#i'm sorry for the person i am right now

[entamewitchlulu]

you know how in battle manga sometimes two characters can stare at each other and they're like, having an image battle in their heads as they each imagine their various moves and how they will be countered before the fight even happens.

yeah that happened in this scene except it was sex

#i'm sorry for the person i am right now #i don't know why this particular fixation has reared back up in me all of a sudden #sherliam #moriarty the patriot #lulu talks

[lilybug-02]

Can you stop trying to correct people about pronouns? Toby Fox has never said that Kris is non-binary. He uses they/them pronouns for the same reasons most video games do with player characters. He left the player's character up to interpretation so you can see them as you like most video games. it's fine if you use they them pronouns but you can't force others to accept something that is your opinion.

Sweetpea. You aren't going to change my mind on the matter, no matter which way you try and say it.

I could care less on what your opinions are on Kris' gender identity, truly. I'm not going to waste my time being frustrated by you. But honey, this is not the blog to be doing this. Like- bro???? Have you seen my content???

I hope you see this more as a learning opportunity.

It frustrates me that you would automatically assume Kris would use he/him. If I was going by your "player" logic, Kris would be using she/her. ACTUALLY if we were going by your full logic, Kris theoretically uses any/all pronouns, to accommodate for all players. Rethink and dissect what you are trying to say, sweetpea :/

Kris has only been using they/them in game. And that is what I will be sticking with.

I am not going to respond to any more of these and I am politely asking for no one to go after this person. Thank you.

#Just a civil chat. Genuinely. #please don't go after him. I really cant handle anything more than I already am right now #anyways. Kris-Chara-Frisk will always use they/them in my interpretation. BYE. #bread #deltarune #ask stuff #sorry if this was a long read. I'm assuming the person isnt even going to read it tbh.

[luna-lovegreat]

Legend sick fics you say 👀

Well I don’t think I remember too many sick fics off the top of my head but weathered and wavering by Quirkle is very good.

Once you have a collection please do share with the class 🫶

Hehe yeah. Here is the original post about Legend sick fics. I got a lot of recommendations in the replies and reblogs that are so cool- seriously I read a ton of them and you guys are so awesome (/gen)

@uniquevoidflowers wrote this fic for me which is amazing of course- it has some of the coolest imagery with a flower thermometer which makes me very happy

Pretty much all of @skyward-floored 's sick fics are awesome, including this legend one that was instantly recommended to me by quite a lot of people lol (since it was posted very recently) (go read it)

Fill the cracks with gold by @sister-dear was so fun to read, it might be one of my favourites for Four

I loved Hiding behind plaster and ceramics by @occasionallyprosie -it had a lot of takes I hadn't seen before and was also very good writing

@arecaceae175 recommended down, a nine chapter sickfic that is really good, I loved reading it.

There's a lot of other ones, and most of them are in the notes of the post I made:

@the-au-collector made this reblog with a ton of good recommendations, and @hero-of-the-wolf reblogged with one I liked. Idk if the links can work like that but we'll find out

And my wisdom tooth surgery went well :D I've stayed off the internet for a bit of recovery. I'm good I'm just not doing too much interacting when I'm tired *shrug*. I was scared because my health is always so bad but it was ok. :))) I have definitely spent a lot of time reading- I knew it was a good idea to ask for sick fics for surgery week XD

So that's the lovely list of sick fics I've been reading- for when you get your wisdom teeth out. Or you're not feeling well, or you just feel like reading. Anyways.

Also my mind is still pretty tired right now but I wanted to answer this- I hope it's ok for everyone I tagged, and my phrasing and language isn't good right now, sorry. Love you guys /plat <333

#asks #personal #Lu fic #?? #I'm not sure what to tag #linked universe #linkeduniverse #yeah cause it's uhh yeah #Lu legend #I've never done fic recommendations before so uhh I just kind of copied other formats after asking my friend for help #I also have barely done links! which is fine! ig. I don't know how those links with the reblogs will have worked so... #let me know if something doesn't work :) #(...I also didn't edit this much so I'm worried about how my words came across also my mind is still bleh because face surgery) #also like a huge fear is getting something wrong? like linking the wrong fic or @ing the wrong person so if I messed up sorry #<3333 #god I love you guys so much #I wasn't expecting that much response but yall came through #who needs actual food not just soft foods when there's fanfic to devour am I right #but really yall are so awesome I could explode fifjfficikcif #twas a wonderful collection of sick fics #and I hope it's ok for everyone I tagged... and I still have so many others I love that's just what I read this week #yeah my mind is not thinking well so I'm going off the internet now #okie bye

[khaire-traveler]

You can become so used to the darkness that you mistake it for the light. What feels safe, feels familiar, is not always as it appears to be.

#sorry that this is so ominous #it's more of a vent post i guess #I'm struggling with my depression and PTSD a lot lately #and it's becoming very difficult to deal with #sometimes with mental illness you end up falling into unhealthy cycles of thinking #or you resist the things that are good and healthy for you #I'm struggling a lot with those things right now #where i am just having a very hard time looking at the positives within my situation #but yeah #personal #vent post #vent

[avisisisis]

i cannot stop thinking about anissa and marky though [COMIC SPOILERS]

how did he react when he learned what his mother did? just like mark, he lived a lie. he thought his mother was kind and nice — the only thing that is true is that she loved him, but now, he has no idea if he should believe it

and. you've grown up being conditioned to believe that violence is peace, and that kindness is a lie and a weakness. you hurt people. by hurting a person, by destroying him irreparably, you found the boy you love most: your son. and you don't regret it. you hope one day, once he sees him, he'll get it. but you still don't regret it. you can't say you're sorry

marky will grow up without his biological father, because when mark hugs him he can only remember his mother and what she did to him. your father can't love you the way your mom did. you can't love your mother the way your father loved his

the worst part is, that it she hadn't done it, you wouldn't have existed. you wouldn't be here. your father will grow to love you. you will grow to accept each other. but you tend to wonder — if he never sees you as anything else other than your mother's son, then who will you have when everyone else you know dies?

#i hate anissa but also her character was done so well #like i hate her #fuck her #but jesus christ. #wow #i feel so bad for marky honestly #when anissa said “i don't regret it. tell him. tell him he'll understand when he sees him” #that shit hurt me #that was the WORST time for you to die girl #i was like “idc about anissa thank fuck she died” but then #i put myself in marky's place. and WOWWW #you gotta be strong to deam with that #YOU GOTTA BE STRONG TO BE ANY INVINCIBLE TBH #LIKE WOW. #thinking about mark now #imagine learning that the person who hurt you the most is a better person now #and that means she regrets kt #but then you learn right after her death that she does not regret it at all #you don't even get to hear an “i'm sorry”. not that you'd have listened to it #then you learn she had a son. with you. named AFTER YOU #honestly i can't blame him for allowing things to be THAT awkward w marky #i am so glad the reconciled tho I don't think I'd be able to live if mark's son hated him #tw sa mention #invincible #invincible comic #comic spoilers #marky grayson #anissa invincible #mark grayson #b4 anyone gets this wrong: I DO NOT SUPPORT WHAT ANISSA DID. it's just that marky's relationship w her is smth i would love to see explored

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

Growing up in an extremely ultra religious, cult-like family was a mindfuck for multiple reasons but that doesn't stop unfortunately, even when you escape. For example, see: The overwhelming feeling of boiling hatred and shame for who you used to be.

The angry hatred for the past person I used to be, the version of myself that mindlessly parroted my family's beliefs and listened to their every command, constantly simmered under my skin and invaded my every thought. I was embarrassed of what I used to be- even as I made friends of different ethnicities and faiths, as I listened and explored new ideas and worlds that I never knew existed, as I started the first LGBTQ+ club at my school and volunteered with kids who deserved so much more- there was always a little voice in the back of my head.

"They would hate you if they knew what you were. They would hate the horrendous teachings that were seared into your mind, the things that you used to say and believe. You are nothing but a pretender."

And it is true that my beliefs were bigoted in all the worst ways. It is true that I believed truly heart-wrenching things without a second thought and judged others in such harsh and unfair ways. I told myself that there was no coming back from that, not really. There was nothing I could do to ever make up for it.

Then I remembered that the person who said those things wore velcro light up sneakers and collected finger puppets that the librarians handed out as awards for reading picture books. The person that held signs at pro-life rallies and anti-LGBTQ+ protests had a cherished sticker book and hunted minnows in the creek after school and adored their puffle on club penguin and was really into greek mythology and had skinned knees from climbing trees at recess and knew every Disney song by heart and was absolutely terrified of the dark.

That person was a child.

I was a child.

It took a really long time. Years and years of reflection and distance, but I've decided that I can't hate the past version of myself anymore. I feel pity and remorse, I feel anger- I feel so much fury and violent rage- at what my childhood was and I grieve what could- no, should- have been, but I no longer resent who I was.

I'm not ashamed.

I am so, so, so unbelievably proud of that little kid. For being brave enough to leave the comfort and safety of what I was told was right. For not being afraid to be wrong. For seeking out information and knowledge in a culture that praised ignorance. For questioning everything, relentlessly.

I am by no means a perfect person, I never have been and I never will, but I am proud of myself in every iteration that has ever existed because I know that I have never stopped trying to understand and learn and grow, and I never will.

If you have ever been in a similar situation and feel similar things, first of all: My condolences on your lost childhood. Second of all: Please be nice to that past version of yourself and recognize all the hard work they did to make you who you are today. That person was a survivor and an inspiration. They deserve nothing but love.

#started anti depressants recently. kinda had an epiphany. i can't hate who i was. if i met me now i wouldn't blame that tiny child #for their rancid beliefs or for being dragged to protests. because thats a CHILD. i HAVE met kids in that position and i feel nothing but #pity and anger on their behalf. so why am i holding that version of myself to a higher standard? #i could not have known what i know now at 6 or 8 or 10. the same way that i could not have written a college level essay at that age #but i did what i could. in my own 8 y/o way. i believed in love and humanity and happiness. i was just misguided in the 'hows' of it all #and i am so so so so so proud. of every single microscopic step that i took. every question i asked. every thought that i hid and protected #and pondered secretly at night until new ideas and doubts bloomed like a dandelion through the pavement #and I'm so proud that i chased that doubt. that i asked why why why why until their ears bled and their voices were raw #until their answers stopped adding up. until i sought knowledge elsewhere with a mind dehydrated and malnourished and begging for knowledge #in any form i could get. i just. if i could hug that kid? if i could right now reach out and give that terrified and lonely child a hug? #i would. a million times over. #anyway sorry for the intense personal rant I'm just going through it rn and I'm like.... actually feeling alright #its wild. did you guys know about this??? anti depressants make you NOT depressed??? shits insane fam #irl #personal

[springs-hurts]

Why do you want to hate Merlin? R

O baba no!! Rationally speaking,i legit love Merlin, have always loved him.

These days, it's just me being irrational and Merlin is main character and I've seen so many bad Arthur takes that I'm kinda fed up. Also cause of my own insecurities, but I promise that's just me being insane.

Whenever I'm able to think like a sane human, I love merlin, he's such a complex, lovable character that you can't not. But I'm in a bad space these days and well, you always need an outlet, Merlin is that kinda outlet for me. Even though I love him...think after sometimes I'd start loving him again, just like I used to do.

#Not right now tho #Pretty sure I love Arthur more #And that's just me trying to hide my biasness? #Idk #I love merlin #But yeah I'm confused #Full of insecurities #So lashing out on main character it is #I legit start crying whenever I see or read smth wrong(according to me) #These days #Hope it'd be over and merlin would again become the person he was inside my mind #Sorry for the rant tho #merlin bbc #and yet here i am #Merlin #merlin emrys #Should I tag #Arthur Pendragon #? #It's not about him tho #bbc merlin

[trans-cuchulainn]

I just got to reading a translation of "The wooing of Emer" online. Why is no-one (especially the online encyclopedias) talking about the fact Emer is fomorian?

why aren't the online encyclopaedias talking about it: bc they are not that useful for medieval irish literature most of the time, tbh, being heavily simplified and reliant on secondary sources that are often themselves not particularly reliable (although there have been efforts to improve some pages inc. wikipedia pages). loads of fun details missing from them, always

why isn't anyone else talking about it: eh. probably two main reasons

there's a lot of it around. cú chulainn's got a fomorian grandma (on lug's side) and no one ever really talks about that either. it's not that big a deal. i'm sure he's not the only one; can't throw a rock around here without hitting someone with a fomorian uncle or something. there's a lot more overlap / interaction between them and the tuatha dé danann than a simple oppositional binary would suggest, and family trees get fucky in general. being related to the fomoire doesn't automatically = being fomorian yourself bc belonging and kin-groups and stuff are a bit more complicated than that

i'm pretty sure it's only mentioned in tochmarc emire and only in passing and not directly in relation to emer herself, so it's easily overlooked even if you're dealing with that text and a lot of people will be dealing with other texts. it's also only in the later, longer redaction of the text and not in the earliest one, although so are a lot of things. if the authors thought it was important as part of her heritage -- whether they saw it as a good or a bad thing -- they would bring it up more often, but TE seems to be the only one that bothers to give background information about forgall's family tree, so mostly it looks like they think it's not that relevant. (although as it is not a particular focus of mine, it's entirely possible it comes up somewhere else and i just haven't noticed)

e.g. you might expect it to come up in fled bricrenn but it doesn't

sidenote: why the fuck henderson translations "ben ind fir as dech" as "wife of the best wight" i have no idea. it's just "fer"! it's just man! why are you trying to make cú chulainn sound even weirder than usual! it's a mystery to me. other than the fact it's from 1899 and people did whatever they wanted at that point tbh

(the parenthetical explaining the meaning of "Manach" is also editorial and not in the Irish; the meaning "tricky" may be more suitable bc it might have something to do with clessa, but that's getting into my friend emmet's in-progress research so i won't delve deeper there)

also, tethra, who is supposedly forgall's uncle in TE and who is described in the text as a "king of the fomoire" is a bit of a weird one iirc and there's potentially more going on with him than that phrasing suggests, although i can't remember the details and that's getting into cath maige tuired territory, at which point you're better off asking @margridarnauds bc it's not a topic i know a huge amount about

finally i'll be honest another factor is probably that there hasn't been a huge amount written about emer as a character. there's been a lot written about texts that she's in and her function there, but less on her just like, as a person (bc medieval celtic studies is a very small field, there are a lot of texts and characters, and there hasn't been that much written about anyone really). so lots of things don't get talked about. doesn't mean they're not worth talking about. just means nobody's got around to it yet.

#i was gonna use serglige con culainn as an example of another text where it could be mentioned and isn't #but then remembered for half that text cu chulainn's wife is somebody else entirely #and it only switches to being emer in the second fragment #so any genealogical material would probably have got lost anyway #side note i am extremely Not Well right now so if any of this doesn't make sense i'm sorry i'm sick af #answered #gawrkin #tochmarc emire #ulster cycle #also sorry @margridarnauds for yeeting all CMT questions in your direction still #i continue not to know anything much about it and you are my go-to CMT-and-related-texts person #feel free to ignore all such tags tho

[hamartia-grander]

Starting to slowly realise I'm really not doing well mentally and it's. concerning. I feel like I should take a break from tumblr bc it takes some of what little energy I have but it's also my source of joy with friends so idk what to do, like I'd miss y'all more than I'd feel good about being away. But if you notice me talking less/not responding in days it's bc I just cannot. I leave your message notifs up so I don't forget tho <3

#Personal #Feeling dreadful bc so many friends have shared with me things they wrote that I SO GENUINELY AM EXCITED TO READ #I've just had literally no time nor energy for ANYTHING I enjoy in like a month #And I'm also literally not sleeping. I'm either not sleeping or I have recurring nightmares that wake me up. It's god-awful #Therapy isn't helping either cause atp I already know everything they're advising me about it's just not working #Nothing's changed either which ofc makes me feel worse. No meds changed no habits changed nothing crazy happened #I'm just suddenly worse than I've been in years which is Not Good #I feel awful for not being able to read my friends' things if I could let y'all see my mind you'd know I want to read what you write so bad #I just can't right now. I'm sorry #Not to mention work and school have been especially more demanding recently and I literally get home after 8 every single night #Don't even eat dinner til past 10pm #Doing hw until 3am etc etc #It's like high-school all over again but I'm an adult with more responsibilities than ever

[rawliverandgoronspice]

The more time goes on, the more I think we (= westerners, especially white westerners) are just so fucking bad at guilt. I feel like guilt is among the most pernicious and dangerous emotions out there --not because guilt is literally deadly in isolation, it is an excruciating emotion but it will not kill you in itself, but because we have been trained to associate guilt with worthlessness (I partially blame christian values, the idea of impurity and sin --not to downplay, of course, the danger of a community judging you or being expelled from that community on the basis of being considered a danger to its other members due to the thing you've done that has been generating this guilt), and so we must, absolutely must, protect ourselves from simply feeling that guilt and processing its cold indifference washing over us, and we must do so through any means necessary. This can involve defensiveness, denial or reject of that guilt altogether so we are mentally protected from having to reevaluate ourselves and our place in the world, or can involve wallowing in and using it to self-harm --focusing on the pain and on self-hate rather than on what the guilt is telling us about ourselves and our heritage; blinding ourselves to it still in a twisted way.

I think it's also complicated to know how to manage guilt in a world where we're generally (as a whole) deeply powerless. It feels unfair to be called out about not doing enough when you know that pulling even mediocre heroics on your own will most definitively do almost nothing, hurt you, and be buried in a way that might be extremely unhelpul --not to mention, that it would actually hurt you in a very real and final way and lead to entirely thankless results, even if it was the morally correct thing to do. I do not want to pretend that it's not, very often, the results that awaits even serious and well-practiced activism --or even mild activism, major shoutout to everybody who got maimed or arrested or even killed on zero basis simply because they happened to be at or even near a protest, when they were not brutally attacked for no reason even outside of activism because an officer was racist or sexist or queerphobic or simply bored that day. There are genuinely good reasons to be scared.

So we feel guilt because of this fear, because of our isolation from any serious movement and the fact that we privilege our comfort over letting action taking over whatever else we have going on, and because fear and comfort knowingly keep us into inaction --or action that doesn't feel like enough, or that we feel doesn't achieve much of anything (which I think is never true: even giving someone a glimpse of hope for a second because we made an effort towards them is always always worth it in my opinion, it's not nothing and it's not a cop-out --of course it's not enough and we collectively need to find ways to do more, but it's not nothing and it should never discourage people from taking action --but I digress). But I think we start making a mistake when we point at this very real powerlessness as a shield from the guilt. Both can coexist. Both have to coexist. It isn't fair that some people are being forced to be courageous when we can afford to remain cowards. It is not even a moral judgement that condemn our souls forever, weakness is human and lack of individual reach against an overwhelmingly powerful and removed system even more so; it is a simple fact that we *have* to acknowledge if we want to take a clear look at the actual situation instead of camouflaging it behind self-justifying walls to give ourselves temporarily relief from that awful feeling. And I'm not saying it's not a constant effort, to keep those instincts of self-preservation at bay, or that some people don't have really good reasons that they cannot act more than through social media or miniscule donations or by talking about it around them, or being powerless to even do that without putting themselves into real and concrete danger --or that letting guilt in will be pleasant or even healing. It won't be. But it's also not the point.

Yeah, I get that it's hard to truly reckon with the fact that almost everything that made us (= westerners, especially white ones) is soaked with blood, imperialism, white supremacy, sexism, queerphobia, and a whole sweve of truly rancid ideologies that we cannot afford to passively accept as our lot. We were not given a choice in that legacy, and we don't have a ton of leverage over reorienting our haunted civilizations into something that isn't a horrible nightmare; but it is a fight that is happening right the fuck now.

I genuinely think guilt is a feeling we are not taught to handle in a healthy way; and because we have essentialist, pseudo-religious and punitive justice concepts terminally untangled with that feeling, guilt governs our politics and our private lives in the most rabid and unchecked way imaginable. But guilt will not kill us, unless we allow it to, and it will help literally nobody if it does. Guilt isn't evil in its soul-crushing pain as much as it is informative. Guilt is unbearable, unfliching clarity. But fever boils us alive because there is an infection that needs to be destroyed.

#thoughts #personal #not zelda #palestine #free palestine #guilt #cw self harm #(not graphic and really in passing) #sorry it's quite different than usual and it's a lot and I don't know if I'll agree with everything in five seconds #but I feel like we don't talk enough about the impact of guilt on our lives and psyches (and politics) #I am not great at guilt either (tho tbh I don't know many people who are) #but I'm trying to get better at simply... shutting up and Feeling It #I'm sure there's a way to face guilt that isn't destructive or self-pitying or generally useless #but I am.... I am so pessimistic about the future #not in a: let's all give up and cry but in a: we must fucking brace ourselves and look after one another #and put our foot in the sand right now because everything is unnacceptable and we need to acknowledge it much harder #if we let it fester it will only get uglier and uglier #and it doesn't mean we won't win or that hope isn't an absolutely essential component to it all #I am ultimately optimistic that there is an After to capitalism and imperialism and that brand of self-centered preservation and brutality #and this general oozing of toxic and unprocessed guilt #But #let's say that we'll all have to lead our own fights against it at some point #and I think that time should be right now #tl;dr imo there's no hope for justice and genuine resistance without facing guilt and resisting the urge to deny or fret against its ache #which doesn't have to equate with allowing guilt to rule us and use it as a tool of self-torment #anywayyyyy #saw a LOT of very weird reactions to the gaza genocide in my personal circles #some that really disappointed me even though they came from people I know to be better than this #so #yeah

[stabbyfoxandrew]

someone please tell me a remote job that an idiot can do that pays like $100 an hour.

#haha. i wrote up a whole vent post about how much life sucks and i wanna stop existing #but i threw that bad boy away bc y'all don't need to see behind the curtain lol #uh seriously though. if you know anything an idiot with no education or experience could do remotely. please god let me know #i am tired of living like this but looking on those job websites only serves to make me sort of... suicidal. like i can't do that right now #also i'm sorry i have a lot of asks again and i don't have the energy to answer right now. #i honestly would like to just lie down and forget i'm a person. but alas. i can't do that. #sigh #diaerie #dep

[batfamfucker]

There are four main types of Batfam fans in regard to how people interpret Bruce Wayne as a dad (/Joking. This is mostly satire and should not be taken seriously):

Fans that think Bruce is emotionally constipated and isn't the best at being a parent but still tries (Differs per person). Don't necessarily think he's absuive but thinks he can be toxic or have unhealthy expectations for the Robins. Can smell the Oldest Daughter Syndrome coming from Dick and have Family Line (By Conan Gray) as their top song on their Dick inspired playlist and Daddy Issues (By The Neighbourhood) for Jason.

Fans that choose to believe Bruce goes to therapy in their own canon. Love B:WFA. Thinks the comic can be cheesy at times and so find a balance between B:WFA Bruce and Please Go To Therapy BruceTM as their middle ground. He struggles. They advocate that Bruce is not a bad parent, he just has bad writers that seem to forget Bruce wouldn't hurt kids, especially not his own. Love the humane moments and scenes he has in BTAS and the early JL cartoons. He may not be perfect but he's not literally abusive. Whores for Bruce being able to admit when he is wrong and for Jason and Bruce reconciling. I recommend Grow As We Go by Ben Platt for this one.

A mix between the first two. Was fine-ish when Dick was younger. Didn't help him in the healthiest way but eh. Still emotionally constipated but that happened more so after Dick left and Jason died. Started getting better when Tim came back but was still closed off. Should probably go to therapy with the kids so they can drag his ass about all the things he's done that have actually affected them negatively. Understands his mistakes and is also able to admit when he's wrong, eventually. It's not easy but he starts to do better and learns to be more emotionally available. Still has to get chewed out by Alfred sometimes but definitely better than he used to be and it shows. Reconciliation is slow and gradual but progress is made for everyone involved.

The one's I personally avoid for my own sanity and wellbeing:

Think Bruce is a complete bastard and abuser. Want him to choke. Hate any and all interpretations of him. Some of which will refuse to understand how anyone could have a different interpretation. Will point out comics where, in all fairness, he is a dick but forget that characterisation can significantly differ from one series to the next, as comic characters are constantly passed around to different writers and have been for decades. Not to mention movies, shows, etc.

#Bruce Wayne #Batman #Batfam #Batdad #I'm not tagging everyone in the Batfam I can't be assed #Sorry there's like 500 #Bruce has a child for every mental disorder he has #Dick is his ADHD. Jason is his C-PTSD. Tim is his Anxiety. Cass is his OCD. Damian is his Autism. #Like bro the therapist is RIGHT there #You have the money just GO #I am a mix of 2 and 3 tbh but more so 2 because he is my comfort fictional father figure. I already have a shit dad irl #I'm not dealing with it in my favourite media too #Type 4 fans scare me I lowkey see so many people like that and I'm like. If the block button wasn't free. I'd be in debt by now #I get that you saw Tom Kings work. So did I. I hate that fuck. But I personally prefer the scene of him in JL with Ace on the swings #Or the one with him playing with shape block toys with a baby whilst Supes and WW handle the questioning #Or when he hugs literally any of his kids #Or the one of him and Jason watching a movie and eating popcorn when Jason's ill. And they have the picture of them posing #Or when he cried in Flashpoint over the letter his dad left him because the little boy in him needed that #Plus any time Bruce and Clark interact as Best Friends. The Golden Age comics where they were basically Dick's gay dads 💀 #But yeah. I could make a poll from this tbh. #This is a generalisation on purpose genuinely do not take it seriously #If I see ANY disclosure. It's delete and block on sight #Bruh I'm still recovering from the notes of my Fallout 4 John Hancock in a Drag Race outfit crossover post #I know it sounds like I'm being paranoid but that's because I am. You have not seen the things I have seen in my notes #You do not know of the wars I have fought of over ghoul dicks and high heels #I have seen things I can never burn from my vision. Read things I will never have the mercy of forgetting #Over silly little shitposts. Lmao. Anyway. Here. Have some food.

[tls123]

Oh my god HOW DID YOU LIKE SVSSS!!!!!

i liked it more than i thought i would but overall less than i might have given the potential of the story, i think in general i really enjoyed the characters (mxtx never goes wrong with characters, she creates them in a way that makes me feel unhinged) and the world building but the pay off to the set up—which i really liked!—felt a bit........ i mean, just alright.

the dynamics too are pure mxtx, personally the bin/gqiu dynamic specifically really was the least interesting part of the whole story. to me!! but individually i loved both characters. my interest was just elsewhere because """elsewhere""" felt way more fascinating idk how to explain it

was very, very happy about the extra with airplane and the yue qingyuan / shen jiu one because that's exactly what i wanted more of in the story itself as well as just more shen yuan/qingqiu interacting with cang qiong mountain

maybe it's my orv brain but like i told jana a while back i think i would have enjoyed svsss way more if it was more about shen yuan (loner; hater; etc) suddenly finding himself among all of these people (disciples looking up to him; sect siblings relying on him one way or another; common folk admiring him; etc etc) and starting to.... live? again?

Shen Qingqiu hadn't noticed that, unconsciously, he no longer considered the disciples around him (...) to be mob characters the novel had described in a scant number of words.

^from volume one, he starts seeing them almost immediately because he's not actually that separate and he genuinely cares. all the time. about everything. even before that we get:

This was only a book, and all the people were constructs, imaginary characters. Logically, Shen Qingqiu was very clear on this fact...but when a character was actually being taunted and bullied right before his eyes, it was just flat-out unrealistic to expect him to be completely unmoved.

like why are you lying, shen yuan (<- svsss tagline if there ever was one)

just the idea of this really lonely detached guy finding a community, i know it's not the story mxtx was trying to tell but again, with the set up i really wanted to see it go in that direction.

there's one line from vol two where liu qingge goes "you fear becoming a burden to cang qiong mountain (...) but cang qiong mountain fears not your burden"

and basically what i'm saying is that i wish the story had been about THAT

(and also ning yingying's lines in that same chapter about shizun always taking on everything himself and why is it always you like that whole moment with the cang qiong mountain almost begging him to see that they care. idek what i'm saying but you know)

(also foaming at the mouth that we only got tiny tiny glimpses of shen yuan's life from before, those handful of times he mentioned his siblings i wanted to take a bite out of my kindle. tell me more!! dear fucking lord tell me more!! keep talking! elaborate!! he really felt very "kim dokja and his fourth wall" at times, sorry once more about the orv brain)

tldr: i guess i wanted a story about shen yuan/qingqiu but mxtx created svsss to be a story about bin/gqiu. and i just have to be okay with that.

#does this make any sense? no. am i still hitting ''post''? yes. sorry kay #fra.txt #fra.xml #pathos-logical #overall i quite enjoyed obsessive lu.o bin.ghe. so intense and possessive about the one person who showed him a little kindness #(so what if he also showed him a lot of pain too here and there?) #but like i said the bin.gqiu dynamic just didn't pull me in. of course to each their own #(''one person'' but poor yingying was trying to help him since day one.) #but also..... to me it felt like his arc was the least satisfying. he just.... is. whereas most everyone else seems to evolve more tangibly #right now i can't help but think of tianlang-jun. ''i can't bring myself to hate humans'' #not to mention all the women from his harem becoming characters in their own right #i wish i could explain myself better but i don't have the words. sorry! #l.uo bin.ghe you ARE interesting i just feel like your story could have been more #as an apology here's my favorite line of yours: ''I don't want you to repay me. I just couldn't get over my anger'' #see?? i pay attention to you too baby boy #i should re-read all of ^^^ that but i won't </3 #edit: one thing i forgot to mention is that i did like the small snippet we got of bin/g-ge reacting to shen yu.an/qin.gqiu #like now that's something that immediately caught my eye it already made for such a more fascinating dynamic. #also i've seen a few things about shen yua.n (not trasmigrated) getting to meet bin.ghe/bin.g-ge and again that i would take a peak at #fully black lotus bin/g-ge coming face to face with shen ''i'm a hater but also can't help but be kind all the time'' yu.an truly pickles #my tickle. i'm sat. i'm listening. i'm compelled.

[elidee-art]

You guys seemed to like my lil Wyll scribbles a lot so here is the first time I ever tried to draw him fhfjdksfd

I'm doing my best shot at a Red run for my first BG3 playthrough so of course my boy was immediately smitten with the sweetest, most sincere guy in the group. (And also Halsin but listen-)

#wyll #wyll ravengard #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #sorry to ppl who are trying to message me I'm literally only logging in right now to queue up art #i am uhhhhh dealing with some home stuff it's not personal I promise

[steakout-05]

how i feel about TBYS causing a shockwave effect of everyone dogpiling on and harassing Illymation and spreading extremely easily disprovable and malicious misinformation about her and putting her in a lot of danger for literally no legitimate reason

#big rant in the tags incoming hold on to your hats: #i swear drama commentary youtubers are actually some of the most dense people on the fucking planet #like holy SHIT i have never seen a bigger display of collective stupidity than every drama commentary grifter harping on illy based on shit #-she didn't even say that they heard from a guy who sounds like budget ben shapiro. how are you that dense. like how. actually how. #it's just a big stupid game of idiot telephone with how much basic shit people are getting wrong because they heard it whispered from- #-another person. istg if i have to see ONE more person say that ''oh but she's encouraging obesity'' ''oh but she said [thing she literally #-didn't say]!!!'' im going to SCREAM. i am going to throw my phone against the wall if i see one more malicious misinterpretation of a- #-basic statement that even a fucking doorknob could understand with more grace and nuance than these idiots #i swear to god this is all so STUPID #drama commentary youtube is where basic reading comprehension and common sense go to die. it is the 10th circle of internet hell- #-just below 4chan. #anyway rant over glad i got that out of my system. #i hope illy is doing well and that she and her partner and her cats are safe <3 #sorry for being so angry. this whole situation literally makes my blood boil and i'm so upset that an innocent person got put in danger- #-because of some nerd emoji sounding wackass blatantly lying about her and being a dickhead #this is the first and last post i'll ever make about internet drama (unless something really REALLY funny happens) i just needed an outlet- #-to scream into for a few minutes #drama commentary youtubers delete their entire channels and leave the internet right now challenge #shitpost #youtube drama

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

I really want Christmas season to feel like Christmas season again this year. it hasn't for a couple years, I've kinda breezed right through it, but I want to try and focus on it this year.

#and if that person who's like 'holidays don't feel special when you're an adult #because you're supposed to have kids to watch experience the wonder of it all but instead you just have a dog and a sad void'' #shows up on this post I swear to God I'm blocking them #that post made me so angry? like what the heck man I #I am single and happy. I don't have a dog and a sad void I have a dog and am full of joy #and I can be intentional about enjoying a season whether or not I have kids (which I never want to btw)??? #I know that post is kinda old and some of you probably know the person who made that comment #nothing against them tbh it was just phrased really confrontationally and kinda frustrated me #there's not only one right way to live a life.... if I don't ever have kids I can still enjoy holidays as an adult??? hello?? #ok sorry hater moment over I'm gonna be joyful now #Lu rambles