#i'm working through it

[storkmuffin]

On not watching the ending to the end

I think this is a Black Sails dead dove post. #anti black sails almost.

Being a descendant of colonized people and an appreciator of Black Sails feels untenable because the net effect of the finale is that the descendants of colonizers (and compatriots of colonizers of now) have John Silver tell a black woman, whose people were enslaved, that rebellion against colonization and enslavement is not worth it because it won't succeed on this try after he made sure that it would fail. It's insulting and infuriating. And after punching me in the face, they are going to dangle my favorites at me like, Hey look but Max did OK for herself, and Anne survived and went back to being a kick ass woman pirate! (Thank you to everyone who gave me such vivid summaries). It's too humiliating to endure, and the fact that the show is so entrancingly well made and beautifully put together makes it much worse.

It's very similar to reading Gone with the Wind, actually, except that book wasn't about me and mine, so I'd read along and think, If a Japanese novelist wrote a fun story like this and then had a Korean person depicted like Mami, Pork, Prissy, Uncle Peter or any of the field hands, and insisted that Koreans found happiness and fulfilment in being colonized and self determination confused & ruined us, I'd be homicidal. Arguably, Black Sails isn't directly about me and mine either, strictly speaking. The rub is that there's so much of the now in Black Sails - my liveblog where I intensely identify with Flint and Billy and Max and Eleanor is evidence. This isn't an issue of me disliking the narrative structure of the way the show ended, though I do, and not just about hating John Silver, which I do. It's the fact that the net message of the show's conclusion is to tell you to make your individual peace with oppression, because you're going to fail anyway.

I think my personal compromise will just have to be, the show ended with Silver pointing the gun at Flint and saying "I don't care." Which is the only true thing he's ever said in his whole life. He didn't get to give that speech. I didn't have to hear it. I do not know that Jack Rackham pontificated about narrative. And so on.

#black sails dead dove #dead dove do not eat #i'm working through it #personal #the urge to articulate this thought has been gnawing at me #black sails is the gone with the wind of rebellion lore #i wish this was just about really disliking john silver and hating him for his betrayal #a lot of words to say: the ending burst my enjoyment of the show and left me feeling really embarassed at core that i got so deeply into it #is this how the dragon girl show people felt when it ended? #black sails meta

[spacedustmantis]

spending all your life as the confident one, the self-assured one, the one that's never had body image issues or struggled with internalized misogyny/homophobia/transphobia, and then finding out at age twenty that actually all this time you've had an unbelievable amount of severe self worth issues rooted in years and years of academic pressure and generational trauma is, a little jarring

#it's a process #i'm working through it #knowing the problem is the first step to solving it after all #but fuck this is rough #buggy thoughts #buggy life #buggy vents

[avonne-writes]

https://www.tumblr.com/avonne-writes/746147828556038144/ahhhh-keep-them-coming-im-so-excited

i’d pay literal money to see ur inbox rn

😂 you'd see the asks I've been hoarding for a few weeks now for drabble purposes

#anon #i'm working through it

[inkerii]

So I have slightly mixed feelings about the kenobi finale / cant help feeling it would hit much harder if I hadnt seen Ahsoka break Vader's mask away first, but y'know a pattern I really did like that hinges on the fact that both did it?

Both Ahsoka and Obi-Wan have to literally tear away Vader's mask to catch a glimpse of the broken angry man inside. Vader doesnt wasn't want them to see it, and they have to resort to actual violence, wear away at him until he LITERALLY breaks before them (and the sad thing is, they still cant see Anakin deep down).

Luke is the only one who *reaches out* to Vader, the only one to gently take the mask off instead of breaking chunks of it. It's a really nice way to top it off because he's the only one to SEE Anakin within. Ahsoka and Obi-Wan get a look at Anakin's face, sure, but Luke is the only one that sees him.

#and I think thats really neat #star wars #sw #kenobi spoilers #sw spoilers #sw anakin #sw obi-wan #sw luke #sw ahsoka #I'm in a weird spot with this series bc while I think its pretty good #It still feels like there was some untapped potential in it? #maybe one day I'll be able to articulate it #maybe after a rewatch #lots of things I like but also lots of things I feel could have elevated the show even more #also I'm pretty sure people already saw or said this before but idc lmao #I'm working through it

[shiny-eyed-corvid]

going absolutely feral over this collection of items that washed up on Cornish beaches Lego Lost At Sea on twitter

#others posts #[breathing heavily] guys i'm SO normal about this twitter account #a friend sent to me at work today and I scrolled through for ages #ough #found objects

[sunlitmcgee]

FUCK YOU IT WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE FUCK YOU UNFINISHED SYMPONY FUCK YOU BEING GLAD IT'S DEAD FUCK YOU FUCK YOU IT WAS ABOUT LOVE AND HEALING TOGETHER NOT ROT AMD SHIT THAT ONLY EXISTS TO MAKE YOU MISERABLE

#I'm having normal time rn #I am fine #I'm working through it

[howlsnteeth]

24/05/2022

#i write phrases and poems and shit and have dozens of them tucked away. went through them the other day and this one stood out to me #i'm doing fine sometimes it's just good to doodle something conceptually very sad #alluding of abuse etc. also this was within the month my dog passed away so i was going through it #also i'm working on like a bigger cotl project which is taking a whileeee sorry #artists on tumblr #digital art #pixel art #vent art #canine kin #canine therian #abuse tw

[somnimagus]

My page for @sheikahzine; about Impaz's duty to her village, empty of people and full of memories.

[id in alt text]

#legend of zelda #loz #twilight princess #loz tp #i'm still reeling that someone sent me an ask about this one.. that they took the time to find my tumblr and tell me they liked it #it really meant a lot; thank you to anyone that stops to leave comments like that. they make me happy #but yeah! here's the usual symbolism ramble: #i thought it'd be cool to have the 'spirits' flowing one way and the cats walking through them the other way #to kinda show the difference in life inhabiting the village in the past and present #link's face is covered because impaz was just waiting for 'the hero' so his clothes are what matters; not his face #and it (hopefully) gives a surreal and intangible sense to 'the hero' she could only hope would actually show up #you can feel free to interpret the glowy blue sheikah as ghosts or just as memories of the past! i couldn't decide either way #the one on the bottom left is oot impa since she's implied to be the village founder. so i guess she would be a ghost actually? #fan art #my art #project stuff #and ahhh the book-- everyone's stuff is so beautiful!! #especially the writing. some of the fics made me really tear up and some were so fun and clever. i really love them #a lot of them captured the sheer burden of the role of the sheikah; all of the time and grief and doubt #i know i always say this stuff about every project but. the people i get to work with in these are truly so skilled every time

[striving-artist]

Tumblr skews young, so let me just share this.

The worst thing you can do in a job is not be bad at something. It's to say you are great at something while being bad at something. If you need to improve and you're upfront that you're not the best, people will probably help or teach or explain. They will sympathize when you get put on a task you're not qualified for.

If you claim to be awesome at something when you demonstrably suck at it, all of that good will and sympathy is gone and it will not come back.

Confident is good. Stand up for yourself, know your skills.

But the other side of this is to Know your Faults.

This message brought to you by the 23yo who bragged about how he was great at X and had the best program for it, and I spent the weekend doing his job for him because he is so so bad at it, and only about 5% of what he did is salvageable.

#real life #can't overstate this #you're in better shape if you say you're not certain #if you go 'hey can you walk me through exactly what you want' #even if its just you saying 'I have never done this HERE can you help me be sure I'm doing it the way you want?' #confidence will get you the job #but if you lied? #its going to be years before we trust you again #and yes I work in a teeny tiny industry #so we will gossip and ruin your chances for a longgggg time #but even in larger fields #office jobs love to gossip

[somecunttookmyurl]

the "all customer service people are trained by management to be illiterate apes you can never get any resolutions by design dont be mean about it" crowd would faint to know there is a guy at my bank RIGHT NOW attempting to resolve an issue that would normally take a week

see. i tried to order food (having nothing of note in the house, and too much pain currently to get down 3 flights of stairs about it) and the payment failed on just eat's end.

but it went through fine on my bank's end, so the funds are tied up in "pending"... for a week. my available balance is now 95p so i can't just do it again

the bank cannot typically do anything about this until the normal time frame for collection passes and they funds just release automatically. just eat have zero contactable customer service

but it is for FOOD and there's no more MONEY and i am a DISABLED CUSTOMER so BY FUCKING GOD not on zeeshan's watch

#i said i live by myself - which i do it's kind of the problem right now #so he's actually said 'i fully understand what you're going through so please know i'm here even if you just want to talk to someone #whilst i wait for a response from the product team' #like. ok king #i hope you can always find a pen when you need one and it always works

[ionomycin]

My favorite pieces this year

#artists on tumblr #thank you so much for another year #as long as i can keep doing art #i'm super grateful #got to work on some cool projects #tried to push myself to socialize more #it's hard #super mega hard #but i met a few new people and made friends i think?? #got to play d&d finally #trying to learn how to make friends as an adult lmao #after just focusing on drawing my whole life #shoutout to my plants as well #holding together my mental health through the winter #it's my 3rd christmas in germany #glad to spend another one with my partner in gay

[ohpsshaw]

[I need you to go look up "ICICLE WORKS - I STILL WANT YOU" and start blaring that as loud as you can right now.]

So. Typhus and I have failed in our mission to get him into everyone's bedrolls. Turns out that traumatized vampire got hands. We didn't have the heart to break up with Astarion, and I think we're DnD married now. Please keep us in your prayers.

#bg3 #astarion #bg3 durge #tiefling #typhus #I GUESS HE GETS HIS OWN TAG NOW #you can really see me decide halfway through that I need to stop drawing Astarion like 'Fiend but if therapy would work' #I never take my baldurs gate sketches seriously until the last minute jdhfghdffg #I just flew in from a 2-week body fatigue and boy are my arms tired!!! #also tell me I'm not the only one who's made astarion bite karlach. funniest mistake in the game

[howgalling]

i haven’t got around to soundwaves half of the cassette showdown, have the sketch ^^

i was going to sell them as separate prints so that they could face each other lol (sketch is before I rendered blasters side)

#transformers #soundwave #blaster #cassettes #rewind #frenzy #rumble #laserbeak #ravage #buzzsaw #ramhorn #steeljaw #eject #maccadam #transformers art #before my app for tfnation didnt go through i had SOOO much planned but at the moment I'm working on other stuff now

[egophiliac]

I got a really tough question.

What’s your favorite Twst event of ALL TIME?

I like Harveston

this truly is the hardest question. :( but after much consideration, I think Endless Halloween Night wins out for me, because it's nonstop Characters Being Silly the whole way through. the whole thing is just lots of these little dorks having the most ridiculous interactions, which is always my favorite! and of course the big twist is SO delightfully stupid and doubles down SO hard that it becomes AMAZING and I 100% unironically adore it. AND it's Halloween! everyone is in their cute little costumes and having a spooky adventure! it's great!

however, I am ALSO a big fan of the Harveston event! how can I not be! everyone is wearing comfy winter outfits and getting along really weirdly well with Epel's grandma and he's getting a little worried about that! my terrible loud son sews a plush squirrel and then gives it a silly little nickname and refuses to leave it behind when it breaks! the ending shot with the sled! I LOVE IT.

obviously we need the best of both worlds now

#art #twisted wonderland #malleus in the background: RYUU } >:( #(this is an au where sebek wears his own halloween costume and isn't obsessively trying to match with malleus) #(unless malleus is also wearing a patchwork squirrel costume. hold on wait i should've drawn that instead) #my favorite is when people draw sebek's room and have risugurumi just hanging out on his desk or something #SHE GAVE HER LIFE FOR HIM #well she gave her leg or something anyway #it's been a while i forget #anyway endless halloween night also has my favorite cutscene #which is the five second long cutscene that is literally just floyd going OOH WHAT DOES THIS BUTTON DO and then a battle starts #thank you twst #i believe this is also when trey finds out that sebek's dad is a dentist and immediately makes it weird #while rook is just. dancing around and singing opera in the background. #'did...did he hit his head when we fell through the mirror?' 'no he's just like that' #i have to stop or i'm going to end up recounting the entire event #(sorry this took so long!) (i have been back in Deadline Hell) #(i didn't mean to actually answer this on halloween but it kind of worked out! HAPPY HALLOWEEEEEN)

[willouwood]

God dang-it Grian where the hell are we?!

#this was the first thing that went through my head and I have no idea why! #still working on designs but I'm getting there! #hermitcraft #grian #tangotek #decked out 2 #willo art

[journey-to-the-attic]

one thing about ik is that she will always reach out

#obey me #art #i had the idea for this and managed to bulldoze through drawing it all without losing motivation halfway through #but Do Not expect me to post art this frequently in future #idk how to do panels so if the middle bit with the text might be laid out weird #i added the stars and feathers and stuff because there was a bunch of empty space around the boxes #obey me satan #jtta ik #(btw the crumbling symbol next to the exploding feather is the wrath symbol from in-game) #(with the pride symbol attached upside down at the bottom) #(not so much symbolism as it is just me whacking you over the head with the point but it looks cool) #i had a lot of fun doing satan's more monstrous design so i might try my hand at some of the other demons later? #i do have some ideas for levi (deep sea creatures are just really fun) #also happy nightbringer release day!! it showed up on my homescreen like half an hour ago and i was like “wait what” #for some reason i thought it wasn't releasing til next week?? #the new genshin patch is today as well so looks like i'll have plenty to do with the rest of my free time for the easter hols #(i promise i'm also working on the next chapter of jtta but i am so stuck on how to get lucifer actually Talking) #anyway. here's a gold star for making it through all my rambling in the tags for anyone who did so: ⭐