#i've been thinking about this joke for weeks i love comedy

[scullysflannel]

emmy

#the good wife #bang #i've been thinking about this joke for weeks i love comedy

[harrysfolklore]

buzzcut - blurb

this kinda sucks but it was on my drafts sooo why not, hope you enjoy !

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

//

"I wonder how would I look with my head shaved." Harry randomly said one night both of you were cuddled up in bed.

"Where is that coming from, lovie?" You looked up at him, curious by his sudden statement.

"Dunno, I've never in my almost 30 years of age had a buzzcut," he shrugged, "I feel like It's part of manhood to shave your head at least once."

"Your manhood is just fine," you rolled your eyes with affection and pecked his chin, "But if you want to know how you'd look with no hair, you can always look for those AI pictures your fans have been making lately."

Harry laughed and kissed the crown of your head, leaving the conversation at that and focusing on the romantic comedy movie you picked for the night.

Days passed by and you soon forgot about your conversation and Harry didn't bring up his desire to shave his head again, so when he mentioned that he wanted to get a haircut you assumed that he was getting his usual trim.

Oh boy, were you wrong.

"I want to chop my hair a bit before we head to Vegas." He said a week before your trip, Jeff kept insisting that you needed to see the show he had been working on at the Sphere and you finally agreed.

"That's fine, just don't do anything extreme you know I love the curls." You replied, unaware of what he had up in his sleeve.

"Nothing to worry about, baby." You failed to notice the devilish smile on his face that gave away that he was planning something else.

The following day Harry told you that he was going to Ayae's place to get his haircut, which was weird to you because his hairdresser always came to your house to cut his hair, but you still didn't overthink it too much.

Until you got a text from her that read "Don't kill me or your boyfriend for what he made me do."

Just a minute after you got the text you heard the front door open and your name being called from downstairs.

"H are you home? Ayae texted me but I don't know what she means." You said as you made your way to him, he was standing in your living room, his hair being covered by the hood of his hoodie.

"I cut my hair," he said and a confused frown made its way to your face, "And I'm going to show it to you, but you need to promise me you won't freak."

"Why would I freak? Why are you acting so weird about it?"

Harry only smiled and pulled the hood from his head, revealing that his brand new buzzcut.

You stood in your place for a few minutes before reacting, "Is this some kind of joke?"

"It's not love! I shaved it," he got closer to you, a big smile on his face, “Do you like it?”

“Oh my god! Your hair is really gone! What the fuck, Harry.” You laughed in disbelief, grabbing his face to get a better look at him.

“I told you I wanted to give it a try before my twenties ended, remember?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t think you’d actually do it,” you shook your head, “This is crazy! Does Jeff know? Forget about him does your mom know? Oh my god we need to facetime her right now.”

Harry laughed at your rant, “Jeff knows love, he wants to shave his too, and we’ll facetime mum later,” he pecked your lips quickly, “Now wipe that look off your face! You’re looking at me like I’m an alien!”

“This is just so weird, but also such a you thing to do,” you pecked his lips back, “Your fans are going to be absolutely nuts about this.”

“Lord, that’s what i’m dreading the most.”

A week later you and Harry were standing in the crowd of U2's concert at the Las Vegas Sphere, surrounded by friends and other concertgoers.

Somehow Harry's new look gave him a little more privacy, since the world didn't know that his signature brown curls were gone and he could go unnoticed sometimes.

"You've been busted." You said as you noticed a phone camera filming the both of you, Harry was standing behind you with his hand protectively gripping your neck.

"What, love?" He asked, making you discretely point at the person with the camera.

"Well, I guess the madness stars now."

A day later, pictures and videos of Harry's new haircut flooded the internet, making his fans go crazy once again.

taglist: @lightsoutstyles @willowpains @straightontilmornin n @sleutherclaw @gimsaysay @hazzassmirk @platinumbarbie143 @musicforcinemas @celesteblack08 @scntfrhs @eleanordaisy @lomlolivia a @iceebabies @iloveshawn @be-with-me-so-happily @watermelonsugacry @rayisthehoe @drewrry

#harry styles fake instagram #harry styles imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #harry styles blurb #harry styles one shot #harry styles writing #harry styles x you #harry styles fic #harry styles au #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles headcanon #harry styles fake social media #harry styles fic rec #harrysfolklore #harry styles instagram concept #harry styles headcannon #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fan fic #1k

[operationslipperypuppet]

I've never listened to/Watched naddpod, not yet anyway, and it sounds good like all the dnd stuff out there. Is it multiple campaigns with different people, or how does it work?

Oooh my favorite type of question!

So NADDPod has long campaigns with the same players and DM plus a few bonus campaigns where the same four people which roles (like who DMs)

Murph is the DM for the main campaigns and Emily Axford, Jake Hurwitz, and Caldwell Tanner are the players. There are three main campaigns at this point, campaign 1 started in 2018 and ended in 2020 and has 100 episodes, campaign 2 started in 2020 and ended in 2021 and has 41 episodes, and campaign 3 started in 2022 and is ongoing, currently with 50 episodes.

Caldwell DMed a mini campaign that spanned several months and was then part of the break between c1 and c2, which is called Trinyvale and has 22 episodes. Emily DMed a mini campaign that was also during the c1 to c2 gap with 7 episodes called the Mavrus Chronicles. She’s also the DM of the 4 episode mini campaign that is starting to drop today and will come out between this week and next week.

There are guest PCs in campaigns 1 and 2. Lou Wilson, Zac Oyama, Siobhan Thompson, and Brennan Lee Mulligan have all guested and been part of arcs in the campaigns.

In a similar way to D20, it’s a comedy show that kinda focuses on comedy first and dnd second sometimes. It will also hurt you a bit, like all good stories can.

It’s also entirely theater of the mind, because it’s a podcast, but Murph manages to create insanely complex and visual encounters in every campaign and it’s truly so much fun to listen to every time.

If you’re planning to listen (and I hope you are, it’s a wonderful show), the hardest part can be wondering where to start. I personally started with campaign 1, and I do recommend that to people personally because you can miss some inside jokes and they are learning 5e at the beginning so if you’re big into mechanics it can be easier to listen to the parts where they’re not exactly getting things right all the time first. However, you by no means have to! As long as you’re starting with an episode 1 (c2e1, c3e1, trinyvale e1) you won’t miss out on anything and you can move through the campaigns in any order! (C3 does take place in the same world as c1, 200 years after c1 ends, but if you listen to it first you can absolutely consider c1 to be a prequel).

And because I’d be remiss to not mention it anytime I recommend this to someone, sooner than you’d think possible in c1e1, there’s a conversation about dragon pussy. If you think it’s a funny good time, you’ll love the show. If you hate it, the show might not be for you.

Anyway, thanks for the question and everyone should start listening wherever their pods are cast!

#I popped off a bit oops #naddpod #asks #anon

[bejeweledsims]

the aesthetics challenge: a ten generations legacy challenge

i've always loved to play challenges in the sims 4, i find that they push to gameplays that i otherwise would probably never try, so i decided to try to create my own challenge.

while creating the requirements for each generation i was looking at the aesthetics wiki, so feel free to check it out if you have any doubt as to what an aesthetic means or what it should look like. also, i'm aware that some of this may not fit what some people think about certain aesthetics, but this was my own interpretation of them with the resources provided by the sims 4 gameplay to the date i'm posting this, so be nice pls <3

while making this i realized that someone else had already made a challenge with the same idea, though there are only two aesthetics that appear in both challenges and the requirements are different.

general rules:

though some generations do require you to live in a specific place, i only added the world part as to give you an idea, but you're welcome to have your sim live wherever you wish if not necessary.

given that it's a challenge based around the idea of aesthetics, you should probably create your sim based around the designated aesthetic

unless stated otherwise, you can marry/get together with any sim with whatever traits

use the #aestheticsims4challenge tag if you decide to play this challenge, i'd love to see what other people do with it :)

generation #1: witchcore

growing up you always loved to read about magical worlds and fantastic realms, so you used to stay away from other people and with the company of your beloved books and a cat. but when visiting a mysterious town you meet an strange man who claims to be a spellcaster, you witness all of your dreams come true and beg him to teach how to become one.

traits: cat lover, loner, bookworm

aspiration: spellcraft & sorcery

job: freelancer, writer branch

world: glimmerbrook

requirements:

start as a regular sim, become a spellcaster

move into glimmerbrook as soon as you become a spellcaster

complete the spellcraft & sorcery aspiration

marry a human

learn all the spells of at least one type of magic

complete at least one of the perk trees

maximize the medium, herbalism and fishing skills

generation #2: plant mom

your parent may have been able to cast actual magic and all that, but ever since you were little you knew that the only magic you could do was with plants, and so you commit your life to learning everything you can about them and how to take care of them, but when you're not doing this, and unlike your parent, you love to hangout with other people and your dogs on the outdoors, though you mostly like to talk about plants.

traits: loves the outdoor, dog lover, outgoing

aspiration: freelance botanist

job: gardener, botanist branch

world: any world

requirements:

this heir must be human

reach the top of the gardening career

always have at least one dog

complete the freelance botanist aspiration

spend at least 2 hours every sunday in a park

have a gardening club and have at least one gathering each week

maximize the gardening, herbalism and logic skill

generation #3: clowncore

while your parent was all about plants, hardwork and research, you're more of a joker and would much rather spend your time with other people making them laugh, so you decide to devote your life to it. you try to always see the bright side of things and will always make a joke even in the saddest of times, but that has caused to lose some loved ones along the way.

traits: goofball, outgoing, cheerful

aspiration: joke star

job: entertainer, comedian branch

world: any world

requirements:

complete the joke star aspiration

reach the top of the entertaniner career on the comedian branch

marry and divorce a proper sim

have a neutral relationship with your parents and child

maximize the comedy, mischief and carisma skills

generation #4: cottagecore

it's not that you didn't like your parent, it's just that they could sometimes be... a little too much when it came to their jokes. you always felt as though you got along better with animals than with other people, so you prefered to spend your time in the outdoors surrounded by them, so when you are old enough you move to the countryside and buy a farm where you take of many animals and attend the farm festival, where you fall in love with a local sim.

traits: loves outdoors, good, animal enthusiast

aspiration: country caretaker

job: no job

world: henford-on-bangley

requirements:

never have a job

complete the country caretaker aspiration

live on henford-on-bangley

be close with your grandparent and garden with them

be closer to your proper parent, but live with your goofball parent

marry a sim from henford-on-bangley

maximize the cross-stitch, herbalism, cooking, baking and gardening skills

generation #5: downtown girl

your parents always loved the countryside and it's animals and plants, but that lifestyle was just never for you, and when on a family trip you visit the big city you make a decision: you'll move there as soon as you become a young adult. once there, and with no more company other than a cat you adopt on your first day on the city, you decide to follow your dream of becoming a musician and start from the bottom.

traits: music lover, cat lover, loner

aspiration: city native

job: entertainer, musician branch

world: san myshuno

requirements:

complete the city native aspiration

have a part-time job as a teenager

reach the top of the entertainer career on the musician branch

adopt a cat on your first day on the city

have no more than 3 friends, excluding family members

maximize the singing, charisma, guitar and piano skills

generation #6: dark/light academia

you’ve always have a passion for knowledge and learning, so much so that you prioritize it above anything else, you dream of becoming the first person in your family to attend university. you are always surrounded by books, and you prefer their company to that of other people, which is why many consider you a snob.

traits: bookworm, loner, snob

aspiration: academic

job: writer, on the autor branch

world: any

requirements:

go to university, it must be britechester

join a secret society

maximize writing, research & debate and logic skill

marry a fellow academic with the snob trait

read at least 3 books to each of your kids

reach the top on the writer career on the author branch

generation #7: old money

"some people are simply better than others" it's a phrase that you wholeheartedly believe and live by. you love art, music, books and everything sofisticated, so you choose a career that will allow to enjoy of such things, but when your parents decide to make a call to boost your admission chances to your dream university due to the being alumnus, it makes you forever question whether you truly deserved it or not, so you work harder than everyone else to prove you're worth it.

traits: snob, proper, over-achiever

aspiration: successful lineage

job: business, management branch/acting

world: san myshuno/del sol valley

requirements:

go to university, and major in either economics or communications

reach the top of the business/acting career

complete the successful lineage aspiration

graduate high school as an b student, graduate university with honors

if you choose the acting career, you must win at least 1 starlight accolade and become a 5 star celebrity

marry a famous and snob sims

maximize the gourmet cooking, charisma, parenting and painting skills

generation #8: that girl

they say like parent like children, and they're right. growing up you always saw just how hard your parents worked and how much they managed to achieve due to that hardwork, so you decide to be just like them, except for one little thing: you want to be an internet personality. so you go to college and at the same time become a simfluencer, at least until you graduate, but you still keep updating your social media everytime possible. you are always concerned with becoming your best self in terms of mind and body.

traits: perfectionist, over-achiever, neat

aspiration: renaissance sim

job: simfluencer part-time job as a teenager, style influencer on the trendsetter branch

world: any

requirements:

complete the self-care self-care specialist aspiration

reach the top of the both of your careers

become at least a 3 star celebrity

go to the gym at least three times each week, go to a spa at least once a week

graduate as a a student and valedictorian, graduate university with honors

maximize logic, fitness, wellness, cooking, parenting and baking skills

be close with each of your children

get at least 6 other skills to level 8

generation #9: coastal grandma

you grew up watching your parents constantly working, and while that never stopped them from being as loving and doting as possible, seeing their frantic lifestyle made you realize that you want nothing to do with that lifestyle, in fact, you want to just relax and enjoy life in a beach while drinking your favorite drink. so you work all of your youth and once you become an adult you move to a beach, quit your job and enjoy the rest of your life with your loved ones.

traits: child of the ocean, foodie, insider

aspiration: beach life

job: culinary, chef brand

world: brindleton bay, tartosa, sulani

requirements:

complete the beach life aspiration

move to a beach once you become an adult

marry a good sim

practice wellness

have a good relationship with your child

maximize the cooking, baking, mixology, parenting and knitting skills

generation #10: cryptidcore

a family rumour claims that one of your ancestors wasn’t… precisely human, but everytime you’ve tried asking anyone they just laugh and deny it, saying that no such things exist. well, you’ve decided to prove them wrong, and you will dedicate your life to prove it

traits: loves the outdoors, socially awkward, genius

aspiration: strangerville mistery

job: scientist

world: strangerville

requirements:

befriend a witch, werewolf, vampire, alien, ghost and a mermaid

marry a sim that is one of the previous life states

reach the top of the scientist career

complete the strangerville mistery aspiration

move to strangerville

maximize the vampire lore, photography and logic skills

#sims 4 #ts4 #ts4 legacy #sims 4 legacy challenge #aesthetics4 challenge #aesthetics #the sims 4 aesthetics #the sims 4 challenge

[plscallmeeren]

HIS ASSISTANT

Severus Snape x Reader

Request: yep, by @Chloelouise02

Summary: (Y/n) was Snape's only friend back in their time at Hogwarts, but they had a falling out just before they graduated so he doesn't know how to feel now that she had been appointed as his assistant. This takes place during the golden trio's third year, or, more specifically - in their first lesson.

Warnings: a swear word or two?; dementors; shouting; pretty much just fluff

Word Count: 1.7K+

"Clean up that mess", he drawled lowly, and for the hundredth time that week I fumed at his attitude.

"Magic word?", I seethed, not moving a muscle to reach for my wand.

"If you wanted me to Imperio you, you could just say so", even through all this I heard his suppressed smirk that I would have loved to see after all this time, but apparently wasn't worthy of.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes in disbelief, and was inevitably reminded of our past shared moments. I'm not sure if it made me sad or happy thinking about. Maybe nostalgia is meant to have both.

"How about the other one?"

After a very long and over-dramatic sigh he gave in, boosting my serotonin levels drastically, at least that's what I think this feeling was.

"...Please."

"See? Was that so hard?" He didn't answer but his expression suggested it was indeed so hard.

I pulled out my wand reluctantly and swung the wood wordlessly, the puddle of rainbow-coloured failure vanishing in thin air.

I mean hey, at least it wasn't as bad as Seamus' rumored explosive draughts.

In fact, there were many rumours about all students of Hogwarts as well as teachers from other schools and Rosemary or someone of the likes from down in a Hogsmeade pub.

If I'm being honest, the teachers' room possessed more qualities of a gossip girls set-up, a talk show or a Comedy Drama movie than a teachers' room at all; but I wisely decided a while ago already to keep this to myself.

Severus apparently enjoyed the talk just as, if not more than anyone else, not that he would ever dare to admit it.

Sev...

It felt strange calling him Severus. It felt stranger calling him Snape, though, so to his dismay that's what he was going to have to put up with. We just weren't on good enough terms again for, well, honestly? Anything.

Now you may be wondering how we ended up like this. To keep it short: I'm the second-last week of our last school year he kissed me. And for whatever reason I kissed him back because apparently I had a stupid crush on him; but then he felt guilty because of Lily (am I a joke to him?) and just left and refused to talk to me again.

Great way to treat your best friend. Really. Wicked.

"Is it just my imagination or are you particularly moody right now? Because I could swear I made you laugh an hour ago and I've basically just lost all of my progress." His lip twitched upward as he positioned himself behind one of the front desks, but maybe it was a trick on the eyes.

"No. I am not moody. I am never moody. And I am most certainly not more moody than usual." Those were the most sentences I had gotten out of him in a row all day, but my accomplishment was quickly forgotten at the rubbish he had just made me hear.

"You're never- oh, I get it. I know you're not Mad-Eye. Believe me. You just haven't got the looks", I grinned, before my face fell and I grew serious for once.

"No, seriously. Have you got a bad relationship to the Potter kid or something? Everyone talks about him so much but never in relation to you. Is that it? Are you dreading him?"

I'm pretty sure if you held a really exact ruler to his eyes and you weren't shaking at the look he's giving me now, you would have seen they'd widened a couple of millimeters. But unfortunately I guess no one's gonna take over that job, are they?

He simply stayed silent until all the students had come in and positioned themselves at their desks, including the Potter boy, who was sitting next to who I think was a Weasley.

The lesson began and I watched in curiosity as his eyes flicked to Potter more often than not, although the possibility was still there that it was only because I had brought it up. I gradually regretted not saying so after the lesson more and more.

"This is my new assistant, Ms. (L/n). She will be helping me keep your dim-witted souls under control and prevent you from destroying anything as best as possible", he sent a sharpened glance at Finnigan as he said the last part, making the boy gulp. That has to count for something, right? He hadn't put it that way all the times he introduced me until now, so maybe he was warming up to me again.

I could tell the students wanted to start whispering, but their fear of Severus seemed to surpass even that.

Once he gave the assignment, however, and they started working, I heard my name mentioned in their conversations more often than i would have liked under any circumstances.

I can't believe how judged and pressured you can feel by a bunch of teenagers, even as an adult.

The amount of times it was suggested Sev and I were together or he had a crush on me or something was even more unsettling, yet aside from a casual blown up cauldron on Seamus' behalf the rest of the day went by rather eventlessly.

...

And so did the rest of the week. And the next. And the next. Although I did get rather invested in the drama of Mulligan's relationships, but who didn't?

The dementors on the grounds were becoming more and more annoying, and I was thoroughly sick of them to say the least.

One Saturday I dared to pass the lake and sit down on the edge of the Forbidden Forest. I wanted fresh air, and above all - I wanted to be completely undisturbed.

So, lying down on my jacket I pulled out Tiffany Aching: I Shall Wear Midnight and started reading.

I think I lay there for hours before something happened. Or more accurately, disturbed me.

The air grew cold fast but the wind stood still, as if balancing in the tip of its toes, threatening to plunge forward in one great gust.

As a familiar feeling of sadness invaded me it didn't take long for me to come to my senses and realize what was approaching me.

Dementors. Patronus. Quick. Now.

I spun around, just to look right into it's disgusting face - well, I wouldn't call it that, but then again, what else can one call it?

But before I could do more than draw my wand, before I could utter the words, before a clear thought could even fully pass through my head -

- someone else yelled the spell.

"EXPECTO PROTONUM!"

The voice was suspiciously familiar, so I wasn't all too surprised when I saw the figure of Severus standing on a rock, panting as he held out his wand. The questions that remained were why, how, where and when.

The dementor was being chased away by-

Something that couldn't possibly be true. Anyone who knew Sev - so, not many, I guess - knows that- no, it's can't be.

The figure of a tiger was attempting to pounce on the Dementor, which was gliding away as fast as seemed dementorly possible.

But- a doe- it can't be!

"What were you thinking!?", he raged, marching up to me, wand still raised, "Oh, yes, why not just lie around at the edge of the Forbidden Forest-"

"Severus-"

"-and read a book! Who cares about the dementors whirring around here like a pack of bees!"

"Severus!"

"And what-

"SEV!", I called, but he just yelled louder.

"How stupid are you!? You were never responsible, I guess that never changed, did it? I always have to fucking save you-" That's it.

"SEVERUS FUCKING SNAPE YOU WILL BE QUIET THIS MINUTE."

That seemed to do the job.

"Don't you go on about you saving me, and don't you dare try and embarrass me or something just because you felt embarrassed yourself back then when you were seventeen! How petty can you be? It was one kiss, I don't care!" My breath fell short as I shared the thoughts I had been dying to tell him. "And since when is your patronus the same as mine!?"

He stayed quiet yet again. God, I hate it when he does that. Well, no, I don't, but I hate it when he does it after I confronted him with something.

"I didn't-" Silence again.

"It's been a tiger since the day we kissed." He seemed to deem that enough said as he sulked and began turning away.

Oh, no you won't.

"Is it because you don't regret it?", I called, barely keeping control of my words at this point. "Because you still want to?"

He halted suddenly, whisked around in one motion, and walked up to me. He stood mere inches from me and for the life of me I couldn't tell whether he was about to yell at or kiss me.

The latter was the case.

He simply pecked my lips once before smiling slightly-

I repeat, smiling!

-and walking off yet again. But this time I didn't stop him. In fact, I didn't do anything much as I watched his cape hide him until he felt beyond the horizon.

And I had never minded as much as now.

———————————————————-

A/N:

Oh, to be an assistant...

This was fun, but my autocorrect is actually killing me. Like really. I have French, German, English and emoji keyboards on here and I'm pretty sure I'm gonna lose it

Like every time I'm writing in one language it is ALWAYS, I repeat ALWAYS in a different one.

Anyways, hope you liked this, I would appreciate every comment you can spare :D

-Eren

#severus snape #severus x y/n #snape x reader #professor snape #harry potter #hogwarts fanfiction #young love #hpff #oneshot

[brightlight-dazzlingeyes]

between the lines | interlude

rúben dias x original female character [+18]

synopsis: isabella is a sports journalist covering the premier league. she has sworn to never get involved with a football player. that is, until she meets a handsome portuguese defender. warnings: incorrect journalism references; timeline of events are not faithful to real life; i have never been to england; mutual pining; romantic comedy;  minors dni.

previous chapter | masterlist | next chapter

Interlude

“I think she wants you to sing to her!” Carlos exasperatedly requests me a lullaby. I’m sitting down on the floor in front of my floor length mirror, trying to do something nice with my hair. I'm getting ready for my first day back at work after a short lived summer break. My brother is on facetime, showing me my niece. “I swear, she was saying ‘tía’ a lot. I think she’s asking for the song.”

It’s August and I just got back to England. Getting drunk on Pinot Noir on as many Spanish islands as my money could afford was a goal I gracefully achieved over the break. Okay, maybe ‘gracefully’ is not the best word to describe my alcohol driven antics. But here I am, all pieces glued together, ready for another season.

This time last year I was a rookie in this League and by the end of the season I was having dinner dates with a Prem superstar.

None of that this time, tough. I've grown a year older since my birthday last week, and that means I’m only focusing on my career. For real this time. No more relapses, no more calls in the middle of the night.

So I sing Lucía a song and then I go to work.

“New year, new me, huh?” I point out as Melissa hugs me, she has a new hair color and is rocking a new makeup style.

“Isabella, it’s August.” Mel doesn't share my enthusiasm. “Also, I hate covering pre-season. I always end up making stupid decisions like going blonde or something.”

“What? You didn’t have fun in the US?” I’m still hugging her when I ask.

“Oh, shut up. Your insta stories didn’t help me either, you know?” Mel puts both hands on my shoulders and looks deep into my eyes. “But you had fun, right? You’re feeling good?”

“Yeah, of course. Feeling good. I feel great.” I nod, mostly to myself. “I feel amazing…” 

She agrees and continues to walk.

“I swear I wish I had forgotten most of these dudes' names.” She bites her lips looking menacingly into the horizon. I giggle, ashamed.

“I share the feeling.”

At lunch Mel ordered Japanese food and I just stared at the package for a full minute before deciding to eat.

“You know you can talk to me, right?” It’s the fourth or sixth time she said that to me, ever since she noticed something was off a couple months ago.

It was a Japanese restaurant but I almost didn’t notice at first, being too focused on something else. He wore a button up shirt and I felt like dying.

I remember saying something like:

“I don’t really like Portuguese food. Too many eggs. You guys put eggs in everything. Egg on the entrance, egg on the fish, for desert? Egg flavored cake. Francesinha is a sandwich with egg on top of it. That’s not where the egg is supposed to go, Rúben.”

And he laughed, he laughed at every joke I said. At the end of the night my jaw was hurting from how I smiled at him and I wondered if he felt the same.

It’s a double-edge sword, this whole falling in love thing. Even being the one saying goodbye, I still hurt like I was dumped by my first boyfriend at 16 all over again.

At first it was easy, everything can be a distraction if you try hard enough. But with time the thing I was trying so hard to hide became bigger and louder in my mind. The sound of the laughter, the clicking of the cutlery.

The realization that I chose this, standing outside of Wembley with a microphone in hand; over whatever that was.

This is fine, I’m great.

“How are you feeling about this season?” I question a random City fan outside the stadium.

“Good, yeah.” The lad shrugs.

“You guys already won everything, do you think the players-” I start, but he stops me.

“Nah, we didn’t win everything. There’s always more to win. We only got 3 out of 4 last season.” When he says that, I realize that around 20 meters away from me, in the distance, is the Manchester City bus. I walk faster.

The sound of wanting gets drowned out by a crowded pub and suddenly it's easier to breathe again and everything really is fine.

“Rice, rice, baby!” It’s Victor’s voice that gets a genuine laugh out of me. “I fucking love Wembley!”

We’re all meeting at the pub after the Community Shield game and the atmosphere is exactly like the first day back to school, but with a lot more beer involved.

“Please don’t tell me you have money on Arsenal winning the league.” Seb is sitting next to me, pointing his green bottle to Victor.

“I do. Yes, go ahead, laugh all you want.” Victor raises his voice, looking offended. “I’m not even being optimistic, mate, it’s just the plain truth.”

The entire table laughs and we almost can't hear when he continues. “They’re stronger this year, guys, hear me out.”

“You’re right to be confident, but personally I’m not putting money on Mikel.” Mel says.

I bite my tongue when they ask my opinion.

“I’m being a hundred percent professional this year, no betting, no guessing, just straight analyzing.” The table booed me and I raised my hands in the air, in surrender. “Hey, I didn’t even want to be here. I wish I was in Australia right now.”

“Don't remind me!” Mel sighs and lightly slaps me. “We’re literally the only women not covering the World Cup right now.”

“No whining! Come on, let’s toast.” Seb raises his bottle once again, but this time we all follow. “To a busy and long season!”

And we all repeat: “To a busy and long season!”

#ruben dias #between the lines #football fic #football fanfic #ruben dias fic #rúben dias #ruben dias fanfic

[fategoflatass]

My Winter 2024 Watchlist & Opinions

The feared time has come. After avoiding this post like the plague, I finally put myself to write my pretty unnecessary thoughts on this season that's departing next week or so.

Admittely, it wasn't that big of a deal, but that might be because the bigger titles will come out the following season? (Should I also make a post about that?)

Anyway, let's get started!

Boku no Kokoro no Yabai Yatsu 2nd Season

Comedy, Romance, Slice of Life // ☆☆☆☆

CW: cringey teenagers

Here, we one again get to follow our favorite middle school duo—the edgy boy and the gluttony in human form—as they grow up and find out just how complicated being a teen can be. Awkwardness, idiots and cutsie romance ensured!

This series is just so damn adorable, man! And awkward, holy fuck it can be awkward. But being a teenager is, in big part, going through the cringiest phases possible to cleanse the karma of a lifetime, so is that a bad quality or an amazing depiction of real life?

Anyway, my guys are back and I can't explain just how happy I am about it! I'm usually not that fond of school romances since, well, they tend to be too immature for what I'm currently looking for. This was made especially obvious since I began watching more and more series centered around adult characters.

But this series is quite different—they're immature, yes, but it's not as annoying as they tend to be. You know why? Because they found out about this thing called communication. Yes, they're not the greatests at it, but at least they're trying!

I've been thinking on checking the manga out, although I haven't decided yet. If anyone here has read it/is up to date, should I get into it or wait until next season comes out?

BUCCHIGIRI?!

Action, Supernatural // ☆☆

CW: big ammounts of cringe

Arajin Tomoshibi's reunion with his old pal Matakara Asamine takes an unexpected turn when they stumble into a brawl with the toughest guys in town. And just when you thought things couldn't get weirder, a colossal genie decides to drop in. Brace yourself for the ultimate showdown. It's the clash of the cool and the magical!

(Yes, I stole the summary from AniList. Couldn't bother to write something down for this one).

This series comes from Utsumi Hiroko—the same woman who worked on Free! and Banana Fish, the mind behind SK8; one of my biggest comfort shows. And honestly, it shows!

Because BUCCHIGIRI?! is an amalgamation of all her previous ones.

You have the childhood friend pair composed of the Gentle Giant™ (who's quite literally Makoto 2.0, personality and appareance wise) and a dude who has only one goal in life—for Haru, it was to swim free style. For Arajin, is to get laid. And no, I'm not kidding.

Then you get the delinquents (I refuse to call them gangs. They remind me too much to the Tokyo Revengers guys, and I despise that show) and their corresponding leaders—the fruity freak (who I love, ngl) with the obssesive, brocon little sister (who I despise, ngl), the big ass bitch whose age's unknown but seems too old to be hanging around teens, and later on we get a guy who reminds me a lot of Jamil from Twisted Wonderland only that he's utterly pathetic, a professional crybaby and, overall, unbearable—entirely different from my totally cool and more than respectable guy.

There's not much to say about the rest of the cast since they're forgettable to a fault, having little to not charisma. Expect for the skirt guy, he's neat.

When it comes to the supernatural side of things, ugh. The dude who follows Arajin around is exasperating and so cringey I tend to skip fowards when I know a joke—the joke, the only thing he knows besides fighting—is coming.

Speaking of which, the fight scenes are cool, MAPPA doing their best as always. I just wish they would beat up Arajin more often (and that he didn't have to scream his primal urges every time he's going for a punch).

And, for fuck's sake, don't get me started on Arajin. He's the worst protagonist this woman has ever come out with—zero charisma, a total asshole, a terrible friend, and a guy who'd make you want to die if he ever got a crush on you.

I'll cut it here since it's getting too long and I don't wanna get into spoiler territory (in case anyone cares about that), but yeah. I don't recommend, at all. Go watch her other shows instead.

Dungeon Meshi

Adventure, Comedy, Fantasy // ☆☆☆¾

CW: blood, death, violence

While exploring a dungeon, the adventurer Laios and his party are confronted by and lose against a red dragon—they're left without money, provisions and Laios' sister. But not everything is lost, since they can still save her while the creature digests its food. The problem is, they can't fight with an empty stomach!

The best show of the season, hands down. Not like it had much competition to begin with, but anyway.

When I first heard about the show's plot, I admit it, it didn't call me at all. But certain someone (*cough* @arataka-reigen *cough*) convinced me to give it a try. And here we are!

Honestly, I haven't had a laugh like this with an anime in so long! Not only because of the jokes, but the characters are perfectly designed for the viewer to laugh with and, most importantly, at them. I actually have the theory that they're the ones responsible for the BUCCHIGIRI?! cast's lack of charisma. I mean, they had to steal it from somewhere—is too much!

From what I know, more characters are yet to appear (I saw a catgirl and, as a cat lover, I just gotta see the catgirl) and the story gets darker with time (in case episode eleven wasn't enough hint for you).

I can't wait to see what this story has to offer next!

Gekai Elise

Comedy, Fantasy, Romance // ☆☆½

CW: tracheotomies without gloves

In seek of redemption, Takamoto Aoi becomes a doctor to help those who she would've either mistreated or ignored in her past life. Sadly, she gets involved in a plane crash and dies—only to wake up as her past self, ten years before her demise! She'll now look to become a surgeon once again, in the hopes of changing her fate.

If I had to describe it with one word, it would be meh.

The characters, the plot, the romance—it's all pretty average. A wet piece of cardboard is way more interesting than the entire cast and the story put together. The love story is whatever, not engaging enough to get me interested on their scenes.

What I would've liked is if they went on and changed the affections names for something more fantasy-ish or that has to do with the world in which they live in—I highly doubt these people knew about the existence of Dr. James Parkinson, so why would they name a disease after him? That sorta thing, you know?

But anyways, basic ass story with basic ass characters, and I'm a fool for having given it a chance.

And if I may ask, where the hell is the lamp?!

HIGH CARD Season 2

Action, Fantasy // ☆☆½

CW: cultural appropiation (?), blood, some violence

The High Card team keeps on fighting to mantain peace in the city, all meanwhile some of its members are still dealing with past consequences. But when new trouble surrounding the cards surges, they have to get to work to save the day once again!

Look, if the summary ain't shit is mainly because this show has me so uninspired. The only reason why I didn't steal it from AniList is because it doesn't have one.

In case anyone wonders why I'm still watching this show, same. I guess season one wasn't that bad for me to go and drop it, so I decided to give it a second chance. Do I regret it? Mmh, kinda.

To be honest, it's not entirely bad. I mean, it's certainly worst than its predecessor, but it had an interesting section that had me paying a little more attention than usual for like, two episodes or so. And then it lost me again.

The section I'm talking about is around episodes five to seven, where—and spoiling as little as I can—things get rather dramatic. It felt like a cry for help disguised as character growth that did nothing, absolutely nothing, to the characters themselves. They could've skipped those episodes and it would've been business as usual.

In the first two episodes we get introduced to his superhero-like guy who loves spitting random words in Spanish and, no, he's not even Hispanic. Then, he proceeded to not appear for the rest of the season. At least for now, we're currently in episode ten. But even if he were to appear once again, I don't think there's enough time to develop him or create a plot surrounding his cringey ass.

Also, and this might be petty as hell: they never explain why the cards look like the poker ones? I mean, they shared the lore behind them, yet that didn't explain this? How did they come out with the cards' and combination's names if they're supposed to not be poker related?

Hime-sama, "Goumon" no Jikan desu

Comedy, Fantasy // ☆☆¼

CW: none

Amidst the war between their kingdoms, the Princess is captured and imprisoned by the demons alongside her mythical sword and companion, Excalibur. It all seems grim for these two but, when the time comes around, the demons' torture methods seem a bit... gourmet?

I came into this show solely because of the trailer. What can I say? It looked nice. And to be honest, the entires series does.

These type of shows don't tend to be my cup of tea, but I thought it could turn out to be something similar to Maou-jou de Oyasumi—something that doesn't catch me at first, yet its second half leaves me wanting some more of those charismatic characters (Twilight my beloved).

The problem here is that God, it's repetitive. This series has one sole formula and will repeat it till the end of times, with barely some exceptions.

As LunarEquinox would put it, "it not her being tortured, it's you being tortured by repitition".

Kyuujitsu no Warumono-san

Comedy, Slice of Life // ☆☆☆½

CW: none

Planet Earth and its habitants are in danger; they've become the main target of an evil intergalactic organization who seeks to rule the world! The Rangers do everything in their power to defend the citizens from the General—but today's his day off.

Another fluffly, non plot-centric series. But this one I'm quite fond of.

I guess it's because I really like the «gap moe» concept? The difference between the protagonist's intimidating and powerful look at work and his casual, awkward and panda-obsessed self once he's home it's pretty adorable. It's like he goes from being a lion to one of those long ass domestic cats who'd let you hold him if close enough—only that I think he's supposed to be a lizard(?) of some sorts.

But it's not only him; you also get to see his coworkers with are all very formidable, and even the Rangers themselves. Red having no sense of orientation whatsoever is too relatable, I hate it here.

Not much to say, really. It's just a show about a long ass dude on a trenchcoat whose (most probably, undiagnosed) autism gets him to buy anything panda-related. If he were to become the ruler of the new world, I wouldn't oppose to it.

Loop 7-kaime no Akuyaku Reijou wa, Moto Tekikoku de Jiyuu Kimamana Hanayome Seikatsu wo Mankitsu Suru

Fantasy, Romance // ☆☆☆¾

CW: violence, mentions of war

Rishe Irmgard Weitzner, a duke's daughter, has lived many lives—and it's not a saying. For the past few decades, she's been trapped in a timeloop where her engagement gets called off at age fifteen and, from then fowards, she's decided to go down different paths. A merchant, a doctor, a maid—whatever called her attention. Is in her seventh time she become subject of the affections of infamous crown prince, Arnold Hein—the very same man who'd killed her in one of her past lives as a knight. When he asks Rishe to become his wife, she decides to utilize her every skill to avoid the upcoming war.

This one's different from the others, in the sense that I wasn't there when the first episode premiered. I guess it hadn't caught my attention (and the way they colored the hairs looked so bad to me at times, and still does). But again, certain someone began posting about it and I couldn't help myself.

I found this series to be a tad more interesting than the average female public-centric fantasy series. They actually cared to build an appealing plot with its politics and all, while also giving us an attractive main couple whose chemistry is quite nice. I like it when the characters banter, they go back and forth a little bit, but still show feelings for each other—is entertaining, isn't it?

While it's not my favorite series from this season, I do find it highly recommendable—independently of whether you're already into this type of shows or you'd like to give them a try.

Majo to Yajuu

Action, Adventure, Drama, Fantasy // ☆☆

CW: violence, blood

A guy carrying a coffin alongside his companion appear in a town, searching for the witch who cursed her and fighting some others in the meantime.

I love dark fantasy stories, so when I stumbled upon this show it grabbed my attention almost immediately. The whole concept of wiches, curses and different types of magic has always been a concept I quite enjoy. When it's well done, that is.

What Majo to Yajuu brings to the table is an uninspired series that unapologetically grabs concepts from other stories similar in concept, and doesn't even try to do anything new with them. The magic system is has is so average and uninteresting, and the same happens with the different conflicts that surround the main plot.

And even when it is supposed to have a more mature tone, there are times where they spoon feed you basic information as if you were too stupid to comprehend the intricacies of something you've seen multiple times—not even in other places, but in the same show, even the same episode.

The characters are heavily boring, the main duo being the most salvable of all. They do have some chemistry, but it's just not enough.

Anyways, just another letdown.

Metallic Rouge

Action, Mystery, Sci-Fi // ☆½

CW: violence

In a future where humankind coexists with androids called Neans, a group of them known as the Immortal Nine rises to cause havoc in society. Rouge, a Nean, alongside investigator Naomi are tasked with going all the way to Mars to stop them.

Also known as Bones' 25th Anniversary project, Metallic Rouge arrived to put many interesting question on the table—question that have been talked about multiple times in movies and series revolving androids and robots, yet is always cool to see what different authors have to say about the matter.

Sadly, the way they decide to manage the story is quite futile when it comes to enjoyment. That is, they decided to take the "show, don't tell" narrative route—something we've seen in series like Tengoku Daimakyou, and damn if it worked there. The thing is that this narration style is rather complicated, and can't be saved if done wrong.

Well, guess what happened?

Whether it's the scripwriters' fault or not, I've no idea. The only thing I know for sure is that they fucked up. The give you little to no information, which doesn't help the viewer to try solving the mystery by themselves nor succeeds at keeping them engaged. The only thing attractive enough are the fight scenes, but they become more are more scarse as the episodes go on. Is then when the staff realizes they messed things up, and as a result you get episode nine—a huge ass info dump, with twists that no one would've been able to guess since they hadn't given us enough hints to even get a hunch of what could be going on.

An absolute mess and a masterful class on how not to do things.

Ninja Kamui

Action, Adventure, Drama, Sci-Fi // ☆☆☆¾

CW: death, fire, blood, violence

Higan is a retired ninja who lives in hiding with his family in rural America. One night, assassins from his former organization end up slaughtering both his wife and son due to him breaking their ancient code. Now seeking for revenge, Higan goes back to his old ways in the means to make them pay.

This one is such a wild ride! From the same director who worked on Jujutsu Kaisen's first season, we get an action-packed revenge series.

Yes, it might not be the most original or complex plot of all times, yet that's not its main focus. What it is its main focus are the fight scenes which are absolutely amazing, so fluid and entertaining. You won't be able to take your eyes from the screen!

Even then, the characters are compelling enough for you to either root for them or hope for the hero to end their lives once and for all.

This series is an absolute banger and no one should sleep on it!

Ore dake Level Up na Ken

Action, Adventure, Fantasy // ☆☆½

CW: death, violence, blood, edgelords

After being slaughtered by monsters in a dungeon that was far from matching his rank, Jinwoo, or "the weakest Hunter of all" as called by many others, wakes up only to find out he now that the "System" by his side. This program that only he can see will help him do the impossible—level up.

So here we are, huh.

The biggest anime this season, and it's a fucking power fantasy with extra steps. I swear to God...

Jinwoo is a boring ass piece of wet cardboard, which is meant for the viewer to find it easier to self-insert as him. Those around him are either beings with no personality at all, default mean guys, or the love interest that just has to be there to tell us just how cool and attractive the protagonist has become—not like we needed her for that, since everyone is a simp for that guy for some hell of a reason—and to be saved because she'd be dead without him.

The only thing worth your time would be the action scenes, but since they depend so much on the viewer's hype, and that mainly comes from those who root for the protagonist, it just doesn't work on me.

This shit's boring, man.

Yubisaki to Renren

Romance, Slice of Life // ☆☆☆½

CW: ableism

Yuki is just your average college student who struggles with classes as one does. One day, she gets helped in the train by an upperclassman named Itsuomi. That's when he finds out that she's actually deaf.

One of the most hyped up series from this season, and for good reasons. Not only is a shoujo—sadly, this series don't tend to get anime adaptations as often as their counterparts—, but is a rather well known one.

To the surprise of no one, this is one fluffy series! The characters are all charismatic and sweet, some more than others, and their personalities and struggles feel very human.

The romance is adorable, although I have it hard to not see Itsuomi as someone who's trying to complete a dating speedrun—might be my demi ass, but they've known each other for like, what, two to three months? And they're already dating?

Yuki's deafness is touched upon with such respect, except for when Oushi opens his fucking mouth. I don't know if it's him or the author themself who sugarcoats his ableism as if it came from sheer worry for her future, but saying deaf people should stay at home is in no way a cool thing to say or think. I doubt he'll stay like this forever, but warning you just in case it results uncomfortable for someone.

To end on a more positive note, I love the fact that they center so much around the character's lip movements! It just feels right for the themes that the series touches upon.

Yuuki Bakuhatsu Bang Bravern

Action, Comedy, Mecha // ☆☆☆½

CW: violence, war, torture (it's just one scene)

In a world where the military utilizes mechas as weapons, Oahu island, where both the Japanese and American troops are located at the moment, gets attacked by an unknown, intergalatic enemy. They'll now have to join forces to defend the planet.

I think it was Mother's Basement's video that convinced me to give this show a chance and, honestly? I don't quite regret it. After all, I like parodies and mechas, so why not combine both?

Given, I haven't watched every mecha anime there is out there—and with that, I mean that I've yet to watch Gundam which I think was a major inspiration for this one series. But even if you haven't watched it either, that doesn't mean you won't get to enjoy it.

It does make references to the genre's different tropes, yeah, but it serves as a standalone. The comedy works even if it's your first mecha series since some scenes are just so absurd.

The characters are cool, each and every one of them having enough charisma for you to be able to remember them through the entire season. They all have enough chemistry with each other to make their bonds belieable.

With time, the series starts leaving the comedy aspect aside and gets more centered around its actual plot—although the laughs never truly leave. And it actually works, which I admit surprised me a bit.

A series curious enough I think you should give it a chance.

#dungeon meshi #solo leveling #bucchigiri?! #yubisaki to renren #boku no kokoro no yabai yatsu #metallic rouge #ninja kamui #high card #7th time loop #hime sama goumon no jikan desu #majo to yajuu #kyuujitsu no warumono san #gekai elise #yuuki bakuhatsu bang bravern #winter 2024

[utilitycaster]

I know the unpopular opinions meme finished ages ago, but id love to hear yours on Chetney, especially given the uthodurn arc. I suppose for more specific direction since thats quite a broad ask, what would you say is the fandom interpretation of Chetney’s character, and how does your opinion/interpretation of him differ and why?

Absolutely - and questions like this one are always welcome!

I was actually quite pleasantly surprised by the fandom response to Chetney this week, which was by and large positive. But with that in mind I think that honestly, it's hard to pin down a definitive fandom interpretation of Chetney's character! Some of this is probably the circles in which I engage and what people put in the main tag, but I think at this point people who felt he was comic relief or a shallow joke or "just couldn't get him!" have either quietly adjusted their expectations or have left the fandom, or have always been people only watching for one character and ignored him from the start.

So I think the thing that differs in my opinion, to be honest, is just that like....I've never reduced him to mere comic relief? Like, he's an extremely funny and ridiculous character, but he showed a great deal of emotional depth from early on; if you didn't pick that up from his rapid turnaround on Dorian it's pretty much impossible to miss in his quiet conversation in the Heartmoor or the way he takes FCG's also ridiculous backstory about Shithead completely in earnest. These two things, as I've mentioned many a time before, are not in conflict! I think Chetney definitely skews far more comedic than, say, Fjord; or obviously more so than other Bells Hells party members Imogen; but like, comedy, tragedy, and horror are all connected by the same tissue, separated only by timing, perspective, and expectation. We know Travis can do a ridiculous character with heavy plot beats as we've seen with Grog; we also know that sometimes the funniest jokes come from more serious characters (again, I think an underrated moment of hilarity in C2 was Caleb's early "you look like a nerd").

It's very narrow and not terribly smart to box characters into a tiny contained archetype with no room to spread out, and Travis is particularly good among the cast at creating characters who defy those boxes. Chetney is an old weirdo with a high voice who says truly preposterous things; he is also someone whose life took an unexpectedly sharp slide downward following an impulsive decision, and who then, improbably, found that what many would consider rock bottom was in fact one of the greatest things that ever happened to him. He's incredibly passionate about what he loves, and vocal about what he dislikes, and deceptively insightful, and has a strong sense of justice and a remarkably good sense of how far he can push people with his over-the-top bravado without wearing out his welcome. He's even (heavily implied to be) bisexual.

I also think, and here's where "oh shit we need to catch up on the entire campaign on the Bells Hells page on the wiki" is really benefiting me, people underestimate how quietly instrumental Chetney is in many of Bells Hells decisions. He was not just the person to clock Dusk, but also the person to broker the compromise; he served as one of the more levelheaded party members following the disastrous fight with Otohan; he's consistently been the one to ask Imogen to actually consider her relationship with her powers; he was the one who convinced Delilah that she needed them leading Delilah to give Laudna a moment; and it was ultimately his idea to fly the skyship into the key. As of this level, he literally is the brains of the operation, with a +3 INT modifier to Orym, Ashton, and Laudna's +1 (and Imogen's +0 and Fearne and FCG's -1's). He has an overblown public sense of pride, but is remarkably willing to set his ego aside when he is not the focus. And for all he loves being a werewolf, he also does take responsibility for the harm he has done without wallowing in guilt. (Not that exploring guilt isn't valid as well, but I think Chet's approach is an admirable trait).

To be honest I think anyone who's not on board with Chet is uncomfortable with those final notes. Either they're one of the stragglers still on their "but Grog had a 6 INT and despite having five entire years to get over this during which Travis has consistently played characters with at least a +2 to INT, I shall not change my perception" bullshit, or, more realistically, are uncomfortable with the fact that Chetney (and, on a meta level, Travis as a player) both without hesitation will take the lead when appropriate or needed, but also will step aside when the narrative is not about him with absolutely no ego or resentment. I think that last bit really throws people off, especially people of the 'if the show cannot be interpreted as secretly centering my blorbo at all times I'm going to go into my tantrum hole' persuasion.

#answered #faltermoth #not me thinking of a proust quote about an ancient tiny werewolf man #cr tag #chetney pock o'pea

[blacktobackmesa]

Hi, I'm sorry I'm back in your inbox again skfbdjdn, but uhhh I was thinking about the headcanons you posted on Valentine's day and now I've got to know how Gordon would react when he realizes he's developing feelings for Funny Benny who lives in the computer. I'm usually a fairly casual frenrey shipper, but with how good you are at writing the hlvrai cast I'm on the edge of my seat to hear about how their relationship in streamman

Ohhh yes yes good. (Also, no apologies, I love messages, they are my friends) I'm gonna go deep into the paint on this one, check below the cut for Gordon's slow realization, the little things leading up to it, and more.

(There's a little allusion to sexual topics. Nothing explicit. Literally just the fact that adults in relationships can have sex. If you are a fan of the show where the climactic final boss monologue has heavy discussion of a dick slip, I don't think you're going to be scandalized, but I've been wrong before.)

Gordon and Benrey have that fun dynamic of "omg stopp what are you doing (does nothing to stop them)", and there's a lot of ways for both of them to be affectionate while obfuscating their feelings. But it's not really like they're trying to hide anything from each other? It's just the language they've built up to communicate. Like:

"Oh, fuck you." [Gordon Translation: That quip was pretty funny, I'm surprised I didn't see that coming.]

"you wish. say please, k?" [Benrey translation: I'm glad my comedy had the desired effect, so I'm continuing my jokes. I'm also implying intimacy by being comfortable enough to make sex jokes about us.]

At some point, Gordon realizes that his interactions with Benrey are making him feel... almost lonely. Which is weird, because the things that make him feel lonely(?) are all the things he likes about hanging out with Benrey. He figures out that he misses being able to have that kind of dynamic with a romantic partner.

Then it takes another full week for him to do the math that "Being with Benrey makes me think about my past relationships" + "I feel sad that I'm not dating anyone" = "I feel sad that I'm not dating Benrey". Look, he's not a scientist. He just plays one in a video game.

First response to realizing his feelings: MASSIVE ANXIETY.

How can they make this work out? What if he's waited too long? He knew Benrey was into him in the game, but this is several years of platonic interaction later. If Benrey still likes him that way, will he be angry and bitter at Gordon for trying to act like he hasn't been quietly turning down Benrey's affections all this time? Even if Benrey's still interested, they're basically on different planes of reality!

Thankfully, he has someone to talk to who helps get some of those anxieties sorted.

Gordon: what about going on dates? Fang: you go on outings with the science team all the time. You literally sit in the dark and watch movies together at least once a month. Gordon: Am I going to be content in a long-distance relationship where I know we can't ever move in together? Fang: Okay, one: his domain is on a computer in your home. Two, you're pretty dang happy with your ""long distance"" friendships. Three, you have the haptic suit. And four, it is none of my business if you decide to buy some very specialized bluetooth devices. Gordon: dude. Fang: I'm just saying you have options on the physical side.

Thankfully, Benrey's kind of glad he waited. Like, it would be awesome if he and Gordon had been together from the start, but he kind of feels better about who he is as a person at this point. Gotta get Benrey lvl. 5 before you can unlock Ultimate Romance. Anyway Gordon asks him out and he ragdolls on the fucking floor

#frenrey #gordon streamman #you are welcome and invited to share your own ideas on this post #3…2…1…gordon! [gordon] #who killed this [benrey] #fang0riously

[ltwharfy]

"Bob's Burgers" Season 1 Episode Ranking Rewatch (Long Post)

Remember that "Bob's Burgers" episode ranking spreadsheet that @babsvibes came out with a while back? No, well, that's okay. But I personally thought it was one of the coolest things ever.

I particularly love how it calculates average ratings for the seasons because, honestly, I have no freaking clue what my favorite season of "Bob's Burgers" is. I'm certain it's somewhere between seasons 3-10 (inclusive), but other than that, I couldn't say. Because it is an episodic comedy with a rather consistent high level of quality, the individual seasons don't feel that distinct to me. (Now ask me about seasons of "Buffy" or "Deep Space 9" and that's a totally different ballgame...) The writer and director ratings appeal to me for the same reason- I recognize the names of the writers but have never noticed enough variation to label one as a favorite (again, "Buffy" and"DS9" would be contrasts to this.)

But I quickly realized that I couldn't just sit down and rate all the episodes because, for a lot of them, I've never really thought about how good they were. I know the episodes I love and practically have memorized (hey, "Bob Actually", I see you) and I know the rare episodes I had a strong negative reaction. But, honestly, I hadn't thought about "The Hormone-iums" enough recently to be able to assign a number to it.

The solution to this is: rewatch! I'm rewatching every episode and entering a rating in the spradsheet within minutes of finishing it- the ratings are very much a gut reaction after watching the episode! I've finished rewatching season 1 and my thoughts on it are below (I'm also watching episodes I come across on cable when I have the time, so I do have some episodes from later seasons filled in and I'll share subsequent seasons as they get completed.)

Oh, and here's a word about what the ratings mean to me: I'm seeing this as a 1-5 scale that I could rate all TV shows, or even all types of entertainment, on. So, a 3 doesn't mean I think it's an average episode of "Bob's Burgers", it means I think it is an average episode of television. It means it's fine, I wouldn't turn it off if I wanted to watch TV and it was all that was on. I also think of the scale a lot like letter grades with 3= a C, 4=B, and 5=A. That also explains why I haven't actually rated anything a 2 or a 1 yet. The Belcher kids might get Ds on their report cards, but "Bob's Burgers" rarely makes D episodes, IMO.

Okay, if you actually read the several paragraphs of introduction, here are my Season 1 episode ratings (the episode rating is the number in the furthest right column):

The average (mean) for the season was 3.54 and the mode (most common rating) was 3.

Some thoughts on the season as a whole:

First, I think one of my less commonly-held opinions in "Bob's Burgers" fandom is that I don't think Season 1 was awful. It's not as great as the show would become but, honestly, I think it is far from the worst example of Early Installment Weirdness on a show that I love. I've watched the show since it debuted, and even in those early episodes I enjoyed it enough to keep coming back week after week. If it had been cancelled after season 1, I wouldn't've viewed it as a tragedy like "Firefly" or "Terriers", but I would've been annoyed because I thought it was a promising show that made me laugh sometimes and had some talented folks working on it.

Rewatching these early episodes, I still found a lot to enjoy about them. There are some classic storylines and jokes, and while there was definitely a process of fine-tuning that would continue through the first few seasons, I think most of the character's core personalities are pretty recognizable. (Bob is actually the character whose personality seems most different in my book. It was really Bob's personality and the general family dynamic that took the longest to figure out.)

Some thoughts on particular episodes:

One thing I noted while doing the ratings is that 3 can mean at least two different things to me. Sometimes, 3 just means the episode is meh; I'm kind of indifferent it to it but it's okay. "Torpedo" falls in that category. I have very little to say about "Torpedo". Other times, 3 is more of a mixed review, where I loved some things and hated others. An example of that would be "Human Flesh"- I hate the child molester and autism jokes. But I really enjoy other bits, like Hugo's poem, Bob's speech to the protestors that ends up going off the rails, the kids locking Bob out of the restaurant, etc. So, I just average out the good and the bad and give it a 3.

It was interesting comparing my feelings towards these episodes going into them versus the ratings I ended up giving them. I ended up enjoying "Sexy Dance Fighting" and "Sacred Cow" more than I thought I would. Can't really give a good explanation except "they were funnier than I remembered". With "Sacred Cow", I'll add that I really like Randy and his dynamic with Bob, and that, on rewatch, the episode wasn't as mean spirited towards vegetarians as I recalled it being (my sister has been a vegetarian for decades, so I hate when people make cheap shots at them.)

On the other hand, my ratings for "Hamburger Dinner Theater" and "Sheesh! Cab, Bob?" were lower than they would've been if I was just going from memory. For those two, the subsequent evolution of the show made me like them less than I did when they first aired. For "Hamburger Dinner Theater", I remember really liking the songs when it first aired...but the show has done so much more impressive musical work since then that I can't say it's songs elevate it. For "Sheesh! Cab, Bob?", I really dislike the mocking of Jimmy Pesto's diaper fetish towards the end of it. It just seems mean spirited and out of character for the show when compared to later seasons. Yeah, Jimmy's a jerk but we shouldn't mock his sex stuff.

I totally admit that the ratings are shaped by my own personal tastes, and maybe the best example of that is "Spaghetti Western and Meatballs" getting a 4. Why did it get a 4 rather than a 3? Mainly because its really the first episode where we see the softer side of Louise and realize how much her relationships with her family, especially her dad, mean to her, and I love that stuff.

EDITED TO ADD: "Art Crawl"! I can't believe that when I originally posted this I didn't mention anything about the first episode I give a 5. I wish I could give a better explanation than "I found it very funny: but that's pretty much it. It is one that I remembered considering a highlight back when I was first watching this season, and in this case, I found it even funnier than I remembered. I really enjoy Edith and Harold- their voices and hostility towards the Belchers crack me up- and this was a great introduction to them. I particularly love the scene when Edith refuses to let Harold drink water from Bob's Burgers. Oh, and this episode introduces Gayle, too, and does a great job with it! Just a solid, hilarious episode, IMO.

Random thoughts (stuff that doesn't affect the ratings):

Gloria is my least favorite "Bob's Burgers" character. If you had asked me prior to the rewatch, I might say she has no redeeming moments on the show. But in "Crawl Space" she sticks up for Bob and Linda to Mr. Frond. So she has one good moment, in the show's second episode.

The bit of Early Installment Weirdness that bothers me the most? Ms. LaBonz's voice is off! Contrasting her appearance in "Lobsterfest" to her later appearances makes it clear how much the voice helps make the character.

I'm a big fan of the supporting characters in Louise's 4th grade class- Rudy, Kaylee, Arnold, Chloe, Millie, Jessica...so it is so weird that none of them are present in these early episodes but Large Tommy is! Weird to think that after Louise, he was first of those 4th graders to be introduced- he has a non-speaking role in the pilot episode!

Is there anybody out there who ships Normal Sized Jenny and Regular Sized Rudy? They've clearly got a lot in common....(This is a stupid joke. The last thing I need is another Rudy ship.)

I'll probably post something like this when I finish rating each season. The other posts will likely be shorter because they won't have the several paragraphs of introductory text at the beginning. Thanks for reading if you did!

#bob's burgers #bob's burgers season 1 #bob's burgers episode ranking rewatch #long post

[leaf-kei]

Hello! Love your Time squad posts ! Canon wise: do you think Larry was in love with Tuddrussel? What about XJ5 being in love with Sheila idea ? I really love checking for canon evidences it is so fun

HI!!!! I AM SO SORRY it took me so long to answer you ;__; My bad... I wanted to wait until I could give this ask my Full attention (tbh I've had Team Fortress 2 brain worms for weeks and have been unable to focus on anything GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT).

I'm so glad you like my posts! ;w; In general, I don't think things need to be canon to be worth thinking about & exploring creatively... but buddy? Larry being in love with Tuddrussel? That is IN THE SHOW. I can't stress enough that this HAPPENS in Time Squad. I would venture to say Larry wanting a loving relationship with Tudd and Tudd not giving it to him is a reoccurring theme (along with history and slapstick comedy and. gender roles, weirdly??? tune in for THAT essay later lmao). You may have seen it already, but I compiled a bunch of my favorite TuddLarry moments in a video here! It also includes moments where Something Gay Happens On Screen no matter what characters are involved... I know it's all there for comedy, but for the most part, the gay jokes in TS don't feel like they come from a hateful place to me. Everyone gets made fun of equally in this show... it has that kind of mean-spirited early 2000s humor lol

My absolute favorite underrated TuddLarry canon moment of all time is in A Thrilla At Attila's. In Tudd's fantasy recollection of the mission, Otto and Larry look up to him as a great leader... it's VERY CUTE that Tudd's dream is to be genuinely admired by them 😭 BUT at one point, the fantasy Larry (who is inexplicably wearing a tutu) swoons over Tudd with little hearts over his head while Tudd is fighting some other guy?! THIS IS IN TUDD'S FANTASY HE WISHES THIS WOULD HAPPEN

U know what, I'm gonna take this opportunity to ramble about family commitment as a central theme of the show!!

- Otto is literally adopted by Tudd and Larry (Larry calls it adoption in Kubla Khan't), and Otto's addition to the squad forces their business-only relationship to change. Time Squad is (at least partly) about three very different characters navigating a new family dynamic formed by chance.

- They naturally fall into typical sitcom family roles: Tudd's the manchild fun dad, Larry's the homemaking strict mom, and Otto's the sweet kid who's trying to keep the peace... their personalities clash as they try to live and work and be happy together. It's significant that they're alone on the satellite they live on; with no one else from their own time period around them while they're at home, they're isolated with one another like a family unit in a suburban house. Even though they fight, they grow to love each other over time... what's that thing people say about hate and love being two sides of the same coin? I feel like Larry's love for Tudd manifests as anger a lot of the time—he gets upset whenever Tudd doesn't measure up to his ideal of a domestic partner. Is that healthy? Idk, probably not, but that's the way it is for them (at least in the two seasons that exist 👀).

- Of course, family commitments aren't always harmonious, and for these guys things are chaotic MOST of the time... but no matter what historical figures they meet or temptations they face, at the end of the day, they always come back together. They're a family, it's as simple as that. Otto doesn't need to have a logical reason to turn down George Washington's offer to adopt him in Father Figure of Our Country—no one can replace Tuddrussel, and that's it.

So tl;dr, Time Squad is about two men adopting a child and having a domestic committed relationship, and it uses that setup to tell funny stories and introduce fun conflict !?? And it's all in a cute art style AND there's HISTORY??? Cartoon Network should ABSOLUTELY bring it back and make a new season HEAR MY PLEA

—Of course, I think Tudd and Larry's relationship developing into a romantic (but still wacky) one would be a great setup for such a new season! But that's just my post-canon fantasy ;^) ... and what all my fanart and little writings are about lol

ANYWAYS HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Edit: SHIT I forgot to mention XJ5!! I ADORE the idea they have a crush on Sheila, that's my headcanon too!! BUT instead of being a jerk like Tudd is to Larry, Sheila is only ever considerate and nice and professional and friendly to XJ5 🤲 And XJ5 is so awkward with social situations (a real Robot's Robot) that they have no idea how to approach these feelings or how to articulate them at all... they could use a few lessons in human behavior from Larry hmmm?

#time squad #larry 3000 #buck tuddrussel #otto osworth #cartoon network #cartoon cartoons #asks #tuddlarry #THANKS AGAIN

[riemmetric]

Some thoughts about storytelling and TV shows.

I'm going through a stressful time right now (for happy reasons, though!) and so I've fallen a little bit in a habit of watching random episodes of various shows I'm interested in before bed. Because I'm impatient and my brain goes a million kilometers per hour, I can't help but read IMDB pages and look at tumblr gifs, so a lot of the stuff I watched is already "spoiled" for me (in quotations marks because these are called spoilers, but they don't always stop me from watching a a show or take away from my enjoyment of it).

This post contains spoilers.

I watched Sports Night in the last two weeks because of Aaron Sorkin's writing and it made me think about how much the constraints coming for the network producing the show influence the story. The show was marketed as a comedy, even featured a laugh track in the first season, the episodes were only 20 minutes, and it didn't survive past the second season. The ratings were just not good. There are plenty of interesting themes in this show that I felt were only superficially explored and I blame it on all of the factors I listed. We didn't get a deep dive into Dan's mental health issues, because it wouldn't have been very funny. We didn't get any closure on the Dana and Casey situation, because the show ended prematurely. There was very little debate about the importance of sports and sports journalists, because the episodes were only 20 minutes, and they also had to contain jokes and relationship drama and an obligatory heartfelt monologue at the end. I'm so, so happy that Sorkin remade this idea into The Newsroom, a much more serious show, with a bigger budget, the ability to say fuck and a timeline that feels complete. It was an idea so good it was worth a second try and it paid off. It made me think about all the ideas I wasn't skilled enough to make happen, it made me think about all my past projects that deserve a second chance and it made me at peace with the concept of reusing writing that I love in new ways. Nothing is ever truly lost.

I watched a few episodes of The Good Wife because of Josh Charles and Matt Czuchry (only Matt was not enough to convince me to watch a seven season legal drama). I found them interesting, compelling, and I love they way they were filmed and colored (they remind me of Suits and The Newsroom, which both aired around the same era of television; some parallels to think about here). But I couldn't help myself and I read the IMDB page of the show, which told me Josh Charles' character dies in the middle of season 5. I watched that episode (minus epsilon, plus epsilon, which is a fun way for me of saying I also watched the episode before and after) and I liked how the story portrayed the sudden death of an important person in the characters' lives, the grief and the dissonance that come with going through a life altering event before lunch and having to continue the rest of the day among people who have no idea what just happened. It's a good piece of writing and in real life death does happen at inconvenient times, it does make you ask why over and over again with no answers to be had, so the death of a beloved character in the middle of a season is anything but unrealistic. But I couldn't help wondering. Did it really happen because the writers thought it was an important story to be told, or did it happen because Josh Charles wanted to leave the show? (I haven't gone to investigate this thought). Was the story the most important thing considered here, or was simply a contract, a real life issue, dictating the story, taking it in a different direction that was originally planned? It made me think about how fickle of a medium TV is, about all the different ways in which parts of the story have to be sacrificed. It made me think about the different ways in which writers have to adaptable, about how in TV you are sometimes forced to kill your darlings instead of it being just good advice. And it made think about the fascinating process of writing a story with the help of a community, all these different people - actors, directors, editors - contributing to the story. It's not the writer at their desk controlling everything, it's a different beast entirely, a beast with many hearts.

#on writing #writerblr #writeblr #i'm putting it in these tags because it is very much an analysis of storytelling #on storytelling #sports night #the good wife #thoughts

[themultifandomgal]

Tyler Hoechlin- Our Love

The Hollywood Reporter Interview

August 2012

"Do I have anything in my teeth?" I ask Tyler before we sit down on a couch together

"No your all good" I give him a smile before sitting down. Next to us is Crystal and Posey and next to them is Holland and Colton

"Are you guys ready?" our interviewer Haley asks

"Yes" we all say getting comfortable in our seats

"Ok so erm they just announced that you guys have been renewed for season 3 which is going to be 24 episodes"

"Yeah I'm a little nervous to see how that's going to turn out" Posey replies "I'm stoked don't get me wrong because we're going to be in LA which is where most of us live instead of Atlanta, I love Atlanta but it..."

"It's cold" Colton says making me chuckle

"It's hot in the summer" I reply

"YN what's it going to be like for you since you have to move to LA for the filming?"

"Errm I'm nervous. I'm keeping my apartment here in Atlanta for when I'm back home. I'm not used to being away from my parents for so long so it's going to be strange"

"Have you found a new place to live yet?" Haley asks

"Yes I have. It's just a 1 bedroomed apartment, but it's big enough for me"

"And obviously that means that this show is really successful becausethey're putting enough faith in you guys to do 24 episodes right. What do you think about the show makes it so

popular?"

"It's very appealing in a lot of different ways, like it's super relatable. First of all like the situation's that the kids go through, most of them least, you know high school first love. Getting bit by random people in the woods. Happens to me at least once a week" Posey jokes making us all chuckle a little "also you know it appeals to

every type of age and person because it's got awesome romance awesome comedy and action and character building it's err.. any help guys"

"For me what I think is so appealing and for a lot of people who I've talked to, is that the heart of the show is really the relationships and I think our created does a really good job of making sure that those relationships are very similar to what would happen at home and you know in the students life" Crystal says.

We move on to talking about the rest of season 2 and what is going to be happening

"Can you tell me everything that happens in the rest of season 2"

"No but what we can say is there's going to be a bunch of fights" Posey starts off

"Death" Holland adds in

"Everyones relationships are going to be tested" I say

"Lydia will finally know she's on a show about werewolves so I'm excited to see how our characters pick sides”

“Is there anything you’d like your characters to do?” Haley asks

“I want Scott to play the guitar, that’s basically it”

“I think it would be interesting to see Allison as a schizophrenic”

“I want to see Stella’s softer side more. I know we get a touch of that around Derek and their relationship but she’s got some walls to break down and I think it would be interesting to see her vulnerable in season 3” I say to Haley

“Since we’re at comic con what do you guys geek out about?”

“Space” I reply “it’s very fitting my character on the show is called Estella since in Latin that means star”

“YN has her own telescope and books on space” Ty says looking at me smiling

“I made these guys stay up till like 3am the once to watch a meteor shower”

“Wow. And what about the rest of you guys?” Tyler talks about his love for game of thrones, Posey and Holland talk about halo. We then sum up the rest of season 2 then we’re done for the day. We all head back to our hotel to get ready to go out for dinner later on in the evening.

#tyler hoechlin imagine #tyler hoechlin x reader #tyler hoechlin x oc #tyler hoechlin #teen wolf actress #teen wolf comic con #teen wolf imagine #teen wolf cast #teen wolf

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

There should be more Andy Zaltzman in the world. Sorry to bother you it's not really a question but why isn't there more Andy Zaltzman in the world? I've been good and not drinking for a week now and I think I deserve more Andy Zaltzman fuck I don't even like cricket but this shitting world don't give me no choice.

Andy Zaltzman is, in my book, the only comedian that makes sense.

Good night legend of Canada.

There’s this martial arts gym where I used to run wrestling sessions for their fighters, we had a great relationship with the gym and its owners for many years, but I distinctly recall the first time I ever went in there and met everyone, in I think 2009. The guy who worked at the front desk was a great guy, and we were just instantly hit by waves of “God, what a great guy this is” from the first moment we met him. He was clearly really nice in general, but was also just wildly impressed with my best friend and I and our ability to do even pretty basic wrestling things, he asked us to show them to him over and over and marveled at how great we were and couldn’t believe the gym would be blessed with our presence. I have this clear memory of walking out of the gym and back to my friend’s truck, and saying to my friend, “Right, I don’t want to talk to anyone except [guy at the desk’s name] ever again.”

That story came into my head as I read this message, because it was a bit of the same feeling. Okay, everyone else get out of here, I don’t want to talk to anyone except the person who wrote this message ever again. New standard for my inbox: you have to rave mildly coherently about Andy Zaltzman for a bit, and then call me a legend of Canada. Anything else will pale in comparison now. What an utterly excellent message. (I'm joking, everyone feel free to send me anything you like, but you do get extra points for waxing poetic about Andy Zaltzman and calling me a legend.)

God, there should absolutely be more Andy Zaltzman in the world. Unfortunately he cannot be everywhere at once, but since you wrote so eloquently on the subject, here, have a little Andy Zaltzman, as a treat:

Okay, okay, a little more.

The above two are my favourite things to think of whenever I hear Andy Zaltzman talk about the disastrous gigs he's had at comedy clubs and universities. Sometimes I think it's a mystery what happened at the legendary York 2005 Zaltzman and Oliver gig where they were chased off stage, and sometimes I think - okay, Andy, to be fair to that audience, sometimes you're really annoying. In the best way. The best way. Ruthless artistic integrity by doing things like absolutely refusing to give the story a point.

Okay, have a little more.

Look, I'm not into cricket either, but sometimes he talks about other sports! The depth with which he genuinely cares about the integrity of sports and hates things that make a mockery of it is truly admirable. I'm not being ironic or anything this time, like how there's a vague layer of irony over praising of the pun runs, I just really respect his stance on that and commitment to writing jokes pointing out bullshit that ruins sports. His stance on how the word "wrestling" should refer to the sport first and only make people think of the actors on TV if they specify that they mean "pretend wrestling" would make me love him even if I had no other reason to.

Look, I cannot pass up an excuse to post this again:

The UK TV channels know they couldn't handle Zaltzman's power, but they do let him on TV in Australia once in a while:

Also, I cannot recommend enough his 2019 year-end stand-up show, which he released for free as a Bugle episode, which is amazing. It's only the first half - he says in the episode that he might release the second half later in the year but then it never happens - but I think the first half is most of the meat of the show, anyway (he explains in the podcast that the first half is much longer than the second half, because somehow stand-up comedy lets you break the rules of math like that, in addition to letting people play fast and loose with the otherwise fairly rigid definition of "hour"). This is probably in my top ten favourite stand-up shows I've ever heard, and it got released as just another episode of a podcast. Fucking incredible.

Early pun run - not as long as some later ones, but the first one to feature footnotes, and Andy Zaltzman's jokes that feature footnotes never fail to get me:

As far as his pun runs go, I think this one's a bit underrated:

I like that one because I like the ones where he picks a category with a finite number of items, and then hits every single one. Like American post-war presidents. Or Asian countries. "You and I did a rap, am I right?" as "United Arab Emerites" haunts me in my sleep sometimes. As does "Bhutan with the show" "Fuck you!"

I hope this has done just a bit to sate your need for more Andy Zaltzman. Well done on being good and not drinking for a week, you solid gold legend (I'm mixing my references here, but close enough).

[johannestevans]

Lots of new work, some comedy, and an upcoming pub quiz for Galway Pride!

Good evening!

You can get these updates direct to your email inbox here.

So much to cover this week. I have a bunch of event announcements and several media recs - just scroll down to the bottom if you just want my round-up of new works published.

First things first - I've started playing with some buttons on Zazzle, trialling some badge designs for when I'm selling books at conventions next year.

These, and a few other designs, are available on my Zazzle store now! They're obviously quite expensive for individual badges because it's a print-on-demand store, but I'm planning to experiment with some designs over the next year or so, with the hope of selling these sorts of pin badges (as well as stickers and so on) for cheaper later on.

Secondly, I did a comedy set at Ireland's Smallest Comedy Club last week, and I'm going to do another set at Basement Jokes, also here in Galway City, on the 17th of May. If you're up this end of Ireland, come along at 8pm! Basement Jokes is a free entry comedy club, and it's in the basement of The Cellar Bar. Here's the show info.

Thirdly, if you're not in Galway next week but you can make it down the week after, I'll be hosting a pub quiz to help fundraise for Galway Pride this year. There'll be a big quiz with a bunch of rounds, and there'll also be a raffle with prizes from local businesses - there'll be a few signed copies of Heart of Stone in with the other prizes. Quiz entry is €5 per person, and you can find the info here on EventBrite.

A few people have recently approached me about doing book clubs and so on, so I just wanted to state explicitly here that I'm more than happy to answer questions and chat on stream at queer or fantasy book clubs via Zoom or similar! If you're going to have Heart of Stone or any of my other work as your book club pick in Ireland, the North of England, or Bristol, depending on where you are, I might be able to come along in person and sign books and so on! You can reach out with that sort of enquiry at [email protected].

Media Recommendations

Maintenance Phase - Maintenance Phase is a great podcast that Lewis got me into, and I've been catching up on a bunch of their old episodes of recent - Maintenance Phase is put together by Aubrey Gordon and Michael Hobbes, and it's a podcast where they unpack common myths and outright lies told in the wellness and diet industries, especially common fatphobic rhetoric, bad science, and conartistry by fitspo and health "experts". They get so catty with unpacking this stuff and it's so cathartic to listen to, but it's all backed up with good, robust tear-downs of the shitty science behind a lot of what they're tearing apart. If you want to listen to just one episode to see how you feel, I would recommend, Is Being Fat Bad For You?, from 16/11/2021.

Yellowjackets (2021--) - Presumably everyone and their mother has been telling you already to check out Yellowjackets - let me just add to the cacophony of voices and say, absolutely, do it. It's got cannibalism, it's got lesbianism, it's got toxic codependency, it's got mental health issues out the wazoo, it's got all the trauma, it's got a breakdown of the effects of misogyny on young sports women in the 90s, it's got cults, it's got the wildest gore, it's got bears, it's got a classic plane, it's got everything! It's fucked up and it's pretty fucking harrowing, especially in the second series, but I'm very much enjoying it.

Lawn Dogs (1997, dir. John Duigan) - This is such a fun flick, and one that I think I related to a lot in regards to the childhood emotions depicted - this is about a young girl growing up in an isolated gated community and her friendship with a guy who mows lawns and is an outsider to that community. I really fucking dug it, I loved the fairy tale aesthetics contrasted with the miserable reality, loved the unpacking of class and gender feels, loved the trauma, love the particularly scathing depiction of emotional neglect. I did review it, and I also watched the same director's 1994 film, Sirens, which stars Hugh Grant. I was planning to go through Duigan's back catalogue and watch some more of his work, but I just want to forewarn that Thandiwe Newton has accused him of sexual abuse - this has obviously put me off going back through it and has tempered my feelings about the art to say the least. Obviously I believe Newton, and if you are going to watch Duigan's work, make sure to do it in a way that won't give him further payment or aplomb where you can.

For new releases, I watched The Pope's Exorcist (2023, dir. Julius Avery) and Dungeons and Dragons: Honour Among Thieves (2023, dir. John Francis Daley & Jonatham M. Goldstein). These are obviously very different films, one a supernatural horror about an Italian exorcist on a silly little mopend and the other a fucking A++ adventurous romp of a DnD party on a disastrous and delightful campaign - I recommend them, glowingly and with love, in the same breath because both of them feel so completely sincere and earnest in their shameless love of their subject. There's no ironic self-effacement, there's no sarcasm about the plot from within the plot iself, there's no attempts to imply that the characters or the plot are above or superior to others in their genre. Everyone in these movies goes fucking ham, they camp it up, and it's absolutely glorious. I am so tired of Joss Whedon-esque quips about how shitty the tropes are while we're doing the trope - this sort of return to open sincerity is where it's at. I also watched Renfield (2023, dir. Chris McKay), which unfortunately is not nearly as good - I mention it because it's Nicholas Hoult and Nicholas Cage hamming it up as vampires, and there's some fun aesthetics even though the broader execution is unfortunately pretty shit.

I was in a mood for classic musicals this week, and so I went back and watched Fiddler on the Roof (1971, dir. Norman Jewison) which is obviously one of the best film musicals ever made, and also Guys and Dolls (1955, dir. Joseph L. Mankiewicz) and Hello, Dolly! (1969, dir. Gene Kelly). They're fun, silly films, and I'm planning to dive deeper and watch a few more old musicals if I can stay on this kick. If you're in the mood for classic movie M/F/M threesomes, there's obviously Cabaret (1972, dir. Bob Fosse) and Singin' in the Rain (1952, dir. Stephen Donen & Gene Kelly).

I've also been replaying Xenoblade Chronicles (2010) this week, and I really recommend it if you've never played it before! It's a gorgeous game with a beautiful soundtrack and some really fucked up themes around body horror, cannibalism, and war alongside the central fantastical plot, and I love it a lot. It's on a few platforms, but I'm playing the original on the Wii.

New Works Published

Firstly, for some Tumblr stuff, I had:

Some notes about casual sex and hook-ups as a disabled person, for which I would love if people do have resources to contribute!

I gave some advice about approaching the introduction of new characters, especially when coming from a background in fanfic.

And if you're doing Monstrous May, I put together some header images for use on your social medias!

Movie Review: Lawn Dogs (1997, dir. John Duigan)

I talked about this movie a bit in my media recs section, but this review is a more extensive dive into the film's themes, especially class, childhood neglect and isolation, queerness and going stealth, and the social dynamics at play in the film.

On Medium / / On Letterboxd

Erotic Short: Hypnotised

Monstrous May Day #3: Hypnotised - An assistant bartender is drawn in by a vampire.

1k, M/M, rated M. Some sexy hypnosis for the purposes of public blood drinking — no sex. An entry for Day #3 of #MonstrousMay.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Erotic Short: The Tentacle Beast

Monstrous May Challenge Day #5: The Tentacle Beast - A priest makes a pledge to his chapter's master. 

Cis M/tentacle beast. Just 600w, short and sweet! For the Monstrous May Challenge 2023.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Fantasy Short: The Many Deaths of Baldr the Undying

One of Odin’s record-keepers interviews the god Loki.

Here’s a big one! 13.6k, rated M for violence, featuring some Loki and Baldr, some Odin scheming off-screen. Lots of delving into and playing with the stories, but with an angel thrown in for flavour.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Fantasy Short: The Injured King

A king seeks out the healing services of a local witch.

Just a little 800w piece.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Fantasy/Romance Short: Paper Houses

A train conductor begins a relationship with a regular passenger.

7k, rated M, M/M. Some sweet autistic 4 autistic love and affection with a build to the relationship and some fantastical elements on the side. Adapted from a TweetFic.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Fantasy Short: Luca's Monster

Cute fiction short! A boy talks to the monster that keeps coming out from under his bed.

1.2k, rated G. Sweet fantasy piece. Adapted from a TweetFic.

On Medium / / On Patreon

#musings #update #original fiction #media recs

[thepenultimaterolo]

9 People I'd Like to Get to Know Better

Thank you to @yoshihashismattebum and @thewaythroughthewoods for the tag!

Ok, here we go...

Last song: I am going to follow my friends' lead and also give an album! Since it came out last Friday I've been really enjoying Lauran Hibberd's new album, Girlfriend Material. I first heard her when she was supporting The Regrettes on tour, and she's released two fantastic albums since then!

I could spend this whole thing talking about what music I like at the moment if I'm not careful, so I will leave it there!

Favourite colour: Greens and blues are my go-to colours for clothes, decor, etc. For flowers, my favourite colour is probably yellows, or deep pinks, or the colour of whatever flower is looking especially good in the garden right now.

Currently watching: I don't watch a lot of telly tbh, but I watch All Elite Wrestling pretty regularly, and my partner and I are watching Avatar: The Last Airbender together (the original, animated series).

Spicy/savoury/sweet: I'm not a fan of hot-spicy, but between the others it very much depends on my mood... Top tier snacks for me would be paprika crisps, worcestershire sauce French Fries (the crisp), Tunnocks caramel wafers, Wispa (aerated chocolate), and anything involving ginger and dark chocolate.

Relationship status: Very happily in a relationship with my partner for 10 years this spring ❤️

He is wonderful, interesting, kind, clever and funny, and I still can't quite believe I get to share my life with him.

I reworded that sentence so many times because I kept ending it with a joke of some sort, but no! I want to just be genuine for a moment actually! @unpairedbracket: I love you so so much 💕

Obsessions: ok in no particular order:

Gardening: There's just such a joy in watching and helping things grow. Being outside and physically working on something, even just weeding, makes me feel so good. And I love watching new things come up and grow and flower at different points through the year.

Wrestling: @yoshihashismattebum got me into watching pro wrestling during covid, and I would say that it certainly stuck 😝

The first thing I really watched was NJPW, and then I started watching AEW as well, and bits and pieces of other things. We've been going to some Rev Pro shows as well, which have been excellent.

I really like how varied it can be; in the same show you can be super-hyped for an excellently constructed match, crying with laughter at a comedy match, and then crying with emotion at the culmination of a storyline, or just at someone loving what they do.

Wildlife: I get excited about basically all forms of wildlife, and I think I can be a bit of a nightmare to go on a walk with because I'll keep wanting to stop and look at wildflowers / nice moss / birds / cool insects / interesting fungi / etc etc. (sorry guys...)

I'm always excited about seeing bats and foxes and birds of prey, and I also got very excited when I saw a hornet last autumn (so big and yellow and cool!), and also took a photo of a really good stripey spider I found, and showed it to everyone who indicated the slightest bit of interest for a couple of weeks afterwards.

Disco Elysium: I first played this last spring and what a fucking game. I keep thinking about it again and again, and I really want to play through multiple more times...

The worldbuilding is fantastic and fascinating, and there are so many little side details that you can explore. The writing is sincere and thoughtful but also frequently very funny. I played the tribunal with tears running down my face because it makes your choices feel like they matter so much.

I also love that Fayde exists as a resource, and all the discussion of various theories that it supports. It's a game that really invites and rewards that attention to detail.

I'm also reading A Sacred and Terrible Air at the moment (the translated version), which is a book written by the game writers before DE itself, and set in the same world.

Music: ok I lied I am going to talk more about what music I like - and about live music! I love going to gigs and seeing bands live and discovering new bands through the support acts.

The core of my music taste has got to be punk, old and new. I just absolutely love the guitar sound, and the energy, and the thickness of the noise, and being at a gig where the music just saturates the air. (While wearing concert earplugs because I value my hearing, and because going deaf in one ear for a couple of days was pretty scary...) I also love that gigs have such varied demographics, and that we, in our 20s, can go to eg. an Undertones gig and be listening with a load of people who were going to gigs back in the 70s and we're all just enjoying the same music together.

I've been lucky enough to see a lot of my favourite artists play, but bands I would love to see and haven't yet include: Nova Twins, Sløtface, and Soft Play (fka Slaves).

Tags:

Anyone who would like to do this, please consider yourself tagged!

I'm going to specifically tag the following people (but only if you would find it fun!):

@unpairedbracket , @unicornjellybee , @mortphilippa, @lovethatcoat, @pipedreamdragon, @rubiscothegeek, @vermin-disciple, @calamitys-child, @nothingiswrongwithyourarmrests

#better late than never #also oops it got long #. #my posts #tag game #long post