#idk which is like the one to use

[amethyst-halo]

ough

#warrior cats #warriors #shadowsight #sunbeam #asc sky #asc spoilers #warrior cats spoilers #wc spoilers #sketch's sketches #these are from last night when i was feelin it thats why all i have is sad shit #anyway #rootshadowsun #shadowsun #sunshadow #idk which is like the one to use

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail'' #ah tumblr... #writeblr #warm up #idk . having trouble writing rn #ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum #i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for #i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" ..... #no.... not really..... #idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography #like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days #furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing... #this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey. #idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me. #i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will #actually ever happen #ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum

[puppyeared]

renaissance dogys

characters belong to @canisalbus

#i love i loveeee ludovica sm shes so cute. ive only known her for 5 min but i fell in love with her design and i love her friendship #with vasco ^_^ i think them having each other makes hiding their sexualities a little less lonely so thats sweet #ik in modern au shes considered an old friend of vascos but i originally assumed she and vasco fake dated in college or smth #to get their parents off their backs until they came out properly and continued to stay in touch as friends after LMAO #im not very familiar with period fashion so i had to look at renaissance costumes as reference. but i have to admit i love the #high waistlines used in some of their dresses.. i have a minidress with a similar high waistline pressed against the chest and sleeves #also if u squint machete is holding a little paper bag in the 2nd photo which is supposed to be his lunch courtesy of vasco <3 #idk what ludovica would wear in modern au but i thought poet shirts might suit her because theyre like somewhere evenly between #masc and femme. to me anyway.. based on observation lesbians seem to love poet shirts and i think she looks good in one #these are all shitposts.. ill draw serious art of them one of these days i promise #i listened to fools rush in and it reminds me of them.. especially when it goes 'though i see the danger there / if theres a chance #for me then i dont care' like its so poignant and bittersweet.. a little indulgent when u think of those small moments they have togethr #save me gay catholic furries... gay catholic furries... gay catholic furries save me #my art #myart #doodles #fanart #others ocs #canisalbus #fur #furry art #machete #vasco #vaschete #ludovica #sfw fur #furry #anthro

[zosanbrainrot]

He's just a dude, a birthday dude

#święto niepodległości?? nie to urodziny Zoro #zoro #roronoa zoro #I made this instead of working and the deadline is approaching agahshdjfj #must get my shit together #one piece #i like drawing Zoro all wrinkled and scrungly #*wondering if I'm using the word scrungly correctly bcs when I googled there's scrungly but also skrunkly which seems to be different* #i mean he's like idk a disheveled dirt boy #it just feels right to draw him with wrinkles on his face #once again I'm clueless abt chest and arms muscles but I did use refs so maybe it doesn't look too bad #ok i need to go eat sth #my art

[lastoneout]

Saw a post talking about this and didn't want to derail it, but like, honestly, at this point, I'm becoming less and less tolerant of people acting like straight/cis passing privilege is a real, very serious thing that needs to be taken into consideration every time someone speaks on queer issues bcs I swear to god the only time I ever see it actually brought up is when someone is trying to deny someone else a seat at the table. Like first it was used against bi+ people to explain why we're not queer unless we're in a same gender relationship, and then it was used to shit all over ace and aro people for not being "visibly queer", then they turned on nonbinary people who "look cis", and now I see people throwing it at trans men for some reason like???? This is legit becoming an exclusionist dogwhistle to me. Any merit to this concept is completely obliterated by assholes who are so addicted to playing oppression olympics they're meticulously crafting pokemon type advantage charts to categorize all the gays based on who actually has "real" problems and who doesn't, it's agonizing.

Like putting "straight/cis passing privilege" up on the shelf next to "comphet" until people can learn how to use it in a way that doesn't invalidate someone else's queerness.

[maypersonne]

Shang Qinghua is such a romance webtoon ass protagonist watch him get married to the Duke of the North for protection and tax reasons make his fief run so much better make everyone's life better make his expertise indispensable make his husband fall madly in love with him then worry about how he's getting divorced in 2 years cause their contract marriage end there and his gorgeous gorgeous husband having now filled the conditions and inherited his title as Lord of the northern lands will find a much higher status and prettier spouse the second the contract is over

Like Mobei Jun could even fonction as a person without Shang Qinghua like the organization of the North wouldn't completely fizzle out in a week if he took his eyes off it

#shang qinghua #mobei jun #moshang #svsss #my thesis is that mobei jun would fucking die without sqh like a very demanding plant in the wrong soil conditions #shang qinghua my dude you'll have to take this one for the team and stay with your very sexy demon forever #historical webtoon #he calls him “my king” like he's a gift from the heavens and the world end at their fief like theres no emperor or country to answer to lik- #-like there's no loyalty in him but for his lord husband #au #i guess #should i tag it #moshang au #or like #svsss au #idk which one is a tag people use so there goes both

[turtleblogatlast]

Leo being put into a situation where there is absolutely no fighting, just verbal manipulation and perception games, would be amazing to witness. We see a lot in the series how good he is at subterfuge and how he uses his perception to manipulate to great effect, so it’d be so cool to really see it put to the test even more.

Manipulation is one of the most effective tactical strategies of all time, so just imagine Leo putting this skillset of his to the full test. Imagine the boys slowly get up to busting bigger and more powerful criminals, including those with networks of crime under their belt, and a simple fight isn’t enough to take them down. For criminals like this, Leo’s skills in subterfuge would be deadly.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rottmnt headcanons #me back to talking about Leo’s incredibly high affinity for subterfuge #genuinely think it’s one of if not his best and most honed skill #AND IT’S A VITAL NINJA SKILL #above fighting battle tactics and the like #it’s verbal blindspots #Sun Tzu’s The Art of War literally states that “the greatest victory is won without battle’’ #and idk I think Leo would be so good at this and we see him do it in the show quite a bit but not to the amount I yearn for #but yeah like just think Leo getting sent in and his bros standing guard #of course he wouldn’t be the ONLY one involved but 100% he’d be the main player #man idk I just really really love when their specific skill sets that ARENT the fighting ones are used it’s so interesting to me #like we already know Leo can easily take in a whole room’s worth of people and know exactly how to avoid them all #we know he can manipulate manipulators into his schemes #we know he’s good at improv which is essential to the games of speech high end criminals like to play #it would be SO INTERESTING #OKAY HEAR ME OUT- #he’s asked by Big Mama to join her at a criminal ball of sorts #she needs to regain power and he needs to take down big name criminals #thus a deal #no but really it’s so cool seeing Leo specifically do his best tactics through thinking like his enemy and predicting how they’d act

[sysig]

You're still standing off to the side. Somehow, center stage has shifted from under your feet without you realizing, and you're standing in the wings, performing to no one.

Starring Role (Patreon)

#My art #ISaT #ISaT Spoilers #Siffrin #Loop #Technically - you know how it goes #Me when I relate to Siffrin: Oh no haha that's probably not great whoops haha #Me when I relate to Loop: Oh. Oh No. #Lenti has such a deathgrip on my ISaT opinions wtf how is she so powerful I thought my fave was Sif?? But I mean well- #Lol #Does this count as vent idk lol #It was fun to write tho :) Very easy! Done all at once! #As was drawing this! Also done all at once! And black and white is still really fun to work with hehe #I got to use some pretty cool outline/lineart tricks for this one yay :D #The original draft of the fic had a different title but ''Starring Role'' is kinda?? too perfect??? #To the point where I looked around and I was like #Kinda shocked that there doesn't Seem? to be another fic with the same title? #Which is.........oddly relevantly thematic to this fic actually hahaha #Not to get too exacting about it but the whole thing of Loop feeling replaceable well #It would imply that other someones could do what they do better than them #What an odd refutation. Huh. Weird #Anyway - behind the scenes fun fact! #I actually really love the song Starring Role but I didn't think of it until after writing this #And now that I sing it to myself it's actually kinda perfect what the heck #So that's something to think about as well #Anyway if you're going to listen to it pls listen to the Axiom remix it is The version in my heart <3 #The glitches and stutters are perfect..... #And the clock ticking?? Why is this song so ISaT I'm gonna think about this for a while now heck #Animatic in my head shower thought -core lol

[quirinah]

ummmmmmm guys this dungeons looking a little dark here..........................ummmm..... hello??? guys??

#quirinahdraws #darkest dungeon #darkest dungeon 2 #IVE BEEN IN THE TRENCHES SO I NEED 2 POST MY EARLY APRIL DRAWINGS FROM WHEN I WAS (am) PLAYING THIS GAME TERMINALLY.... #try to guess my favorite character (very difficult impossible /j) #notable moments include reynauld and dismas kicking the bucket in my first year to which i thought after the latter. ok at least theyre #together in death or watever. anyways i got a beyond the grave a week later with both of them and i could only revive one of them and my #first thought was wow! this would make great angst fodder! i should make a comic (and then i didnt) #but dismas is dead so i can never get the achievement but he basically carried me thru vvulf bc i didnt have any legend lvl frontliners and #i didnt know u could just sacrifice a hero to retreat. or that you had to destroy the bomb barrel HAHAHAHAH but we defeated vvulf SOMEHOW #sketchdump #digital #dd plague doctor #dd jester #dd shieldbreaker #dd arbalest #dd abomination #SORRY FOR YAOIFYING BIGBY THAT BADLY IDK WHAT HAPPENED...ETTO....... #my favorite builds are damage over time <3 number one blight buddy supporter #but marked for death r also my pookies....i just find marked builds a little awkward to use imo. but bh is like my blorbo #i find it funny drawing any of the charas bc i feel like i always draw characters a little too cutesy/colorful but its shrimpresting

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag #writeblr #it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal #fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho) #healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy #im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage.... #1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind #and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes #2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception'' #3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.'' #idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh #im sure there are people who have this experience normally #but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists #when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band'' #edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful #once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large #but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry. #but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes #but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally. #i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes #people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism #but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet . #i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY #and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound. #but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in #i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too. #here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change #was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort) #choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL

[mamawasatesttube]

the thing about generally-accepted broad fanon batfam dynamics is that even if you disregard the complete stripping of all nuance in order to make a perfectly nuclear family with no lasting or significant conflict etc etc, half of it is all just built on vaguely (or explicitly) racist stereotypes anyway, like .......... ah yes the little half arab boy is a violent feral gremlin who can't fit in with refined polite society. the half east asian girl is the golden child who never speaks and is good at everything and has no flaws because she's the favorite who holds the family together. the romani one is a slut. LIKE. okay...!

#and this isn't even getting into latino jason and east asian tim hcs. which aren't inherently racist and i do enjoy sometimes! #but sometimes it's just so like. oh you just went hm the poor guy who's violent uses guns and is in the drug trade... that one is latino now #and oh let's declaw this other guy and make him physically weaker but such a nerd and good at computers and ope now he's east asian #like. idk how people don't see it honestly i really don't. #rimi talks

[coquelicoq]

if you're wondering what the big deal is about the louis-philippe sentence in les misérables, it is, in the original french, 760 words long. the subject of the sentence doesn't appear until 95% of the way through, at word #711; the main verb is word #712. the sentence contains 91 commas and 49 semicolons and is almost entirely a list of laudatory adjectival phrases describing the erstwhile king of france. this is perhaps especially notable because les mis is, shall we say, not known for being particularly gung-ho about the monarchy.

this sentence copied and pasted into Word takes up more than one page single-spaced. in the 1800-page folio classique edition, it is fully two and a half of those 1800 pages. that means that les mis is 0.14% this single sentence. more of les mis is made up of this sentence than earth's atmosphere is made up of carbon dioxide (0.04%). if the page count of les mis stayed the same but every sentence was the length of this one, les mis would consist of only 720 sentences total.

incidentally, guess who named hugo a peer of france 17 years before the publication of les mis?

#he also goes on for another six pages after this but by then he has remembered the existence of the full stop #the endnotes say that hugo 'se devait de faire [ce portrait] aussi favorable que possible à la personnalité de l'homme #qui avait favorisé sa carrière' (had to make this portrait as favorable as possible to the character of the man who had favored his career) #in fairness to hugo it's not like louis-philippe was alive to read this. so he wasn't just sucking up to get something out of it #he says at the end of the chapter that this description is 'entirely disinterested'. which like on the one hand i get #bc like i said louis-philippe was not in power and reading this. but otoh victor 'ancien pair de france' hugo u r not exactly unbiased. lol #les mis #lm 4.1.3 #i just looked up the english translation and gasp! hapgood turned it into four separate sentences!!!! #so i think y'all who are reading it via les mis letters (which uses hapgood i think?) are gonna miss out on the full experience :/ #my posts #linked to #syntax #idk if i got this across but the worst part is that the subject of the sentence - the beginning of the independent clause - #doesn't occur until the very end. so for the first 95% of the sentence you're just waiting for the bass to drop!!! #like reading it out loud you have to raise your pitch at the end of every dependent clause because you haven't gotten to the subject yet #AND THERE ARE SO MANY CLAUSES!! 49 SEMICOLONS PEOPLE!!! FORTY-NINE!!!! #victor hugo would be TERRIBLE as a hype man. he would take so long that the crowd would tear him to pieces with their fingernails #before louis-philippe could come out on stage. and then they'd be so mad at louis-philippe for inspiring him that they'd tear LP apart too #actually i think i'm using hype man wrong. i'm thinking of the guy that gets the crowd hyped up for the main guy before the main guy #makes an appearance. a hype man is the guy who makes interjections during a song. victor hugo would be bad at both of these #like just imagine the announcer at the beginning of a basketball game. and now...your starting lineup...at power forward... #and then he just says the 760-word louis-philippe sentence. #dead. murdered at the hands of the fans. microphone shoved down his trachea.

[royalarchivist]

[A sad violin song plays over an image of a sad hamster]

Pac: This doesn't have anything to do with me – I wear a blue sweatshirt, you're crazy, this mouse doesn't even have a sweatshirt, this hamster! [Reading chat] Am I a depressed hamster?

[ Transcript continued ↓ ]*

–

Pac: Actually– that's fine! I embrace that idea – of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy? [He hits his desk, then starts counting off people on his fingers] Fit is gone, Richarlyson is gone, Ramon is gone, Bagi and Empanada who were always there when we were there are also gone, I haven't seen them! It's just me and Tubbo, and sometimes Philza shows up.

Pac: I lost Chume Labs, I lost the Favela, I lost Murder Mystery, I lost Ilha Chume Labs, it's crazy! Look at how much I've lost, and I've gained nothing! Of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy?! How am I supposed to be happy?!

Pac: [Reading chat] "You have us Pac," that's true, thank you. No, that's true, sorry.

* NOTE: Please note that this is an incomplete transcript, as I was primarily relying on Aypierre's translation mod at the time and if I am not confident of the translation, I do not include it. As always, please feel free to add on translations or message me corrections.

#Pactw #QSMP #Pac #March 18 2024 #As much as I love keeping people updated about Pac / the other Portuguese-speaking creators #I think I might not make as many transcribed posts for their clips anymore #I just don't think I'm qualified enough to be transcribing things for a language I don't know #like yeah we have the Qlobal Translator and Aypierre's translators to rely on #And I'm always upfront when I'm not 100% sure about a translation #but I've been thinking about it a lot and it kinda makes me feel a bit icky. Idk. #I might be overthinking this but I just I don't want to spread around translations I'm not super confident about #esp. since I know a lot of people cite my clips in analysis posts or link them to other people as resources #and 90% of the time I'm like ''Hell yeah I love seeing people getting a lot of use out of the archive'' #but sometimes I get a bit anxious like ''Did I do a good enough job translating this'' #''Am I ruining someone's entire perception of a conversation or character because I left one word out or mistranslated something?'' #And like I said that's normally not a HUGE concern since if I'm not certain about a translation I just won't post a clip. but you know #idk it might just be the anxiety talking but I really really don't want to spread bad info #Happy to hear other folks' perspective #I'm really grateful for people like Bell and Pix and others who translate clips and I always try to reblog those #but we don't have a ton of people posting clips & translating things on Tumblr since we're so English-centric #which is part of the reason WHY I like sharing clips of the non-English-speaking CCs #but at the same time I want to do an accurate job representing what they're saying #Maybe I'll just start posting things and give a TLDR context of what they're talking about but not a transcript #that way native-speakers can hop in and add translations if that's something they're comfortable doing #and if not then well. at least I'm not sharing something that isn't super accurate #idk I'm just thinking out loud a bit in the tags #But I'm open to hearing other people's thoughts on the matter #Anyways giant rant aside. q!Pac is NOT doing ok rn

[moeblob]

Happy Birthday to Ferdinand von Aegir!

I actually made 33 emotes, affectionately known as Aegirglyphics to some, for my own personal use on discord. However, I figure why not share some of them! They're free to use for discord servers/icons/pfps or whatever. However, my only request is Do NOT use them as subscriber emotes on Twitch. You can make them free follower emotes but you are not to make them locked behind a paywall.

#fe three houses #ferdinand von aegir #discord emotes #i thought long and hard about this bc idk the actual want for emotes i made ages ago but #i still love my son and its his bday ad so i should be nice and share #since i no longer have nitro and can no longer use them myself #the fact i can technically post 30 at once was tempting but #some of them arent living up to my standards and also just might not be easy to use in most contexts #so those im gonna skip on lol #whoever wants 21 aegirglyphics tho have at em #i think i might have posted some before? but only 10 and i dont recall which ones #if you want a secret the last three and the middle on the second row are my favorites to use #i used concernednand (the upper one) so much #the internet concerns me guys it was a valid use every time #debated sharing heartnand but honestly the world could benefit from it imo because gotta spread that love #fun lil trivia i love making emotes and so when i was in a server and people knew me as the ferdinand fan and artist #someone was like why hasnt salmon made a ferdinand emote yet #and im like bc i dont run the server and i cant just demand they add my art #and then a mod was like i didnt wanna put pressure on salmon but i thought about it so i was like bet #and then drew a server exclusive happy ferdinand emote #and that was the start of me somehow being able to have like.... ten emotes in that server #some of them were just me joking and then mods encouraging me #cause i used to use felix for every single art prompt theyd give and one week someone said the prompt was pog #and i just was so upset because dude why would i wanna draw felix for that hes not pog #so a mod was like hey if you make a pog felix emote we ill add it to the emotes here #so i once again was like bet and then posted it and then they really added it lmao #anyway sorry for so many rambles please feel free to use them on discord in whatever server #i cant really expect everyone to credit me but also im not really concerned since i fear people know my nands a mile away

[wistfullywaiting2]

Odasaku, Sasaki, and the orphanage headmaster are all buried in the same cemetery.

So Kunikida, Atsushi, and Dazai all run into each other grave visiting regularly and politely pretend they don’t. They never acknowledge the meaning behind the bouquets brought, even if all of them know the others know flower language. They never acknowledge the tear streaks down Atsushi’s face, or the solemn look on Kunikida’s. Atsushi never points out how the scent of whiskey is always a bit stronger on Dazai’s coat. They never acknowledge the location of their accidental meetings.

Sometimes Kunikida might offer to take them to get food, or Atsushi will offer a random hard candy from his pocket, on colder days Dazai might lend his coat. None of them are really themselves when faced with grief, and none of them will to hold it against each other.

#bsd #atsushi nakajima #bsd atsushi #nakajima atsushi #kunikida bsd #bsd kunikida #kunikida doppo #doppo kunikida #bsd dazai #dazai osamu #bsd headcanons #idk #on the floor wallowing in pain as we speak #Meow #bsd sasaki #she slays #oda sakunosuke #wahhhh #sobs them #Dazai lending Atsushi his coat dies #I will never forget how even though Chuuya is characterized as someone who abuses alcohol Dazai is the one who’s canonically an alcoholic #Chuuya is always seen drinking in a social aspect and doesn’t abuse alcohol as much as he just overestimates his limit #While the only time we see into Dazai’s apartment we see and an excessive amount of empty bottles #Implying that Dazai drinks heavily when he’s alone #which is a huge trait of alcoholism #Using this moment to mention my HC that because of the scene in chapter 39 Atsushi doesn’t like hard candy

[arctic-bookclub]

oh also one thing that i realized just now: qbagi’s initial suspicion over what’s happening to qphil being tied to the federation is technically not wrong

you know what drew qphil’s deities’ interest to him and quesadilla island? the birdcage. rose said in her earliest message ”I could sense the bleeding heart of the one I once knew, far, far away”. the deities noticed qphil had disappeared, and maybe they were curious to know what had happened, but the thing that drove them to find him was rose’s want to help him. and if she really was the one that freed him from the cage (and it’s heavily hinted she was), that birdcage undeniably was the thing that launched all of this into action.

how the enderking figured out that qphil had been weakened? we don’t know, maybe he sensed it, maybe he had already been observing him, maybe he noticed rose leaving to look for qphil, it doesn’t really matter. what does matter is that the trauma qphil got from being locked in that cage is what gave the enderking the perfect opportunity to strike. and is what led us to where we are now in the story. so even thought the federation isn’t ultimately the one tormenting qphil right now, it can still all be traced back to them and their continual abuses of power :)

#so anyway if the feds suffer from what’s going on with qphil then uh #you reap what you sow etc etc #good riddance and all that #just another reason to hate the federation #qsmp #qsmp philza #uhh should i tag bagi? #idk maybe her fans might enjoy hearing that she was indeed cooking with the fed comment #qsmp bagi #tell me if i should remove the tag or not idk what bagi’s side of tumblr is like #philza #qsmp federation #shey rambles #also if you really want to dig for og culprit you could start pointing at the watcher #who i believe probably used to work for the feds in the past #based on that one cutscene where all the island like managers or whatever looked a lot like the watcher #aaanyway #you could also say ek was going to come after qphil regardless #which is also fair #i just find the link to the birdcage interesting #anyway moral of the story is fuck the federation and the enderking they’re both mean and stupid #/affectionate at ek but not at the feds