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#ik but consider this: i didnt want to make it sad
caruliaa · 7 months
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someone else when theyre in a thinking of someone as their best friend when they dont think of them that way contest and their opponent is me
#im such a champion in this catagoryy i thought i cldnt top myself but with the person i saw as one of my closest friends#and my best friend telling me im not their best friend and they dont want to be close anymore#im rly setting the world record in being stupid and niave enough to be so attached to#people while being needy and stupid enough for them to not be as attached to me 😻😻😻😻#ykw im not doing it anymore! ill stil try to have close friends and ill make it something clear about me#so i dont do to anyone what was just done to me people know ill never think of them as their best friend before theyd ever consider it#but im not fucking. im not putting myself through being so attached to others just to get let down#and idc ik its soo sad poor sweet optomistic person we all love to have as a friend#so we can benefit from their kindness but wed never think of as closely as they think of us is gone#ik its soo sad for all of u tht im not just some stupid kindness spout that wont turn of anymore#but im just done with its not worth it. im always the one getting hurt and im done getting close enough to let it happen again#AND WHO GIVES A SHIT. NO ONE CARES. WHATS THE POINT#THE PERSON WHO I WANTED BY MY SIDE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE#DIDNT EVEN WANNA STAY BY MY SIDE FOR THE WEEKS LEADING TO MY STUPID BIRTHDAY#WHAT EVEN MATTERS ANYMORE. DEFINATLY NOT ME WHATS THE POINT#TELL SOMEONE YOUR MOST. THE TYPE OF THING THATS SO SCARY TO ADMIT TO ANYONE#AND THEY JUST GET RID OF YOU WHEN LIFE GETS DIFFICULT AFTER YOU OFFER TO MAKE IT EASIER#WHO CARES. who cares. whatever im so mad and scared and empty and upset and just#idl how im ever gonna get through this. its just too much to even feel or deal with#flappy rambles#vent
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hadesnumber1daughter · 4 months
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Pretty like the sun
Pairing: Percy Jackson x Apollo daughter OC (she classes as an oc cause I gave her a name but you can just read it like your name or Y/N if you want, I just feel better when I'm writing and the characters have names :)
Summary: Percy has always felt something for you, something that you had felt aswell. These quests of life and death finally knocked some sense into you two.
Warnings: Blood, Pain, Agony, Violence, Weapons, Wounds, Wound treating, Curse words, Oblivious idiots, Fluff, Angsty??, Sexual tension, Mutual pining, Almost death, Non-Canon, Hugs, Kisses, Holding hands, Ooc Percy??? Cerberus as a violent dog (ik she isnt really but this is my imagine so idc), Not proof-read, GUT-WRENCHING LOVE, IDK how i wrote this considering I've never been in a relationship OR have ever had an actual crush in my 16 sad years of life
Words: 6.3k
Notes: This is my first imagine so I'm sorry if its bad😭😭. Also if anyone would be willing to give me a few pointers when it comes to working this app as a creator please do cause, yeah I've been using this app for years but I have no idea how to use it when it comes to posting things. I would be very grateful. ❤️❤️❤️. Also, if anyone wants to request something else for me to write I would love to write something for either Percy or Luke, I'll probably make a list of people who I'm willing to write for later today cause it is 10am rn and I haven't slept so I'll just go bed after this 😭😭😭
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As soon as percy got handed this quest, with Grover being part of the cloven council and Annabeth being gone to spend time with her family, Percy knew his immediate first choice would be Aurora, there was no doubt about it. The Apollo girl had a spark about her that has drawn him in the second he laid eyes on her.
He had deemed it because she was a daughter of Apollo so there would always be some sort of light that would draw him in, but he hasnt been very sure of that for a very long time. Every time he laid eyes on her, it felt as though time stood still and she was the only source of light and happiness in this dark, gloomy world. 
They had became extremely close when he first came to camp, she taught him the ropes in archery as to put it plainly, he was absolutely shit at it. He had no aim and his stance was awful, in her own words.
When she first said that to him, he wanted to throw her in a dumpster, but then he saw her, he properly saw her. He didnt know what Aphrodite looked like, but he was sure she would be a spitting image of the girl. He was even more sure that she was a daughter of Aphrodite but instead she was not, which made sense as to why she was hanging around the archery booth. From that day forward, she helped him freshen his archery skills, and he helped her with her sword skills.
He has never understood why she wouldnt ask Luke as he was the best swords-man and would probably be a better trainer. However, when he brough it up to her one time her cheeks flushed the tiniest bit and she stated how she was helping him, so he should do that same.
That's how they have ended up here. In the middle of nowhere, trying to find and 'kill' a beast that has been accidently lost and let out from the underworld and send it back. Although quests always have 3 people on them, the oracle specifically stated that this was only a 2 person job. Percy had never been so sure in picking Aurora at that moment in time. 
🌊
"Are you sure we are going the right way Perce, I swear I've seen this tree 3 times already" Aurora stated this time taking a dagger and marking said tree with an X so if they do cross it again, she would be right.
"You never trust my navigation skills sunshine, why is that, is it cause you always get lost in my eyes" he says turning to look at her with a smug smile on his face. The girl abruptly stopped at his turn and could feel the blood rush to her cheeks in that moment, her honey-brown eyes immediately locked with his water coloured eyes and she broke the gaze, not letting him have the satisfaction of being right.
"You wish seaweed brain" she muttered and walked past him knocking into his shoulder in the process which led to him letting out a dramatic gasp.
"That hurts sunshine. Where are you going, it's getting dark, we should stop, set up camp and get some rest so we can re-think and re-strategize." The girl slowly stops her steps and turns her back to the boy who is standing there leaning against a tree with his arms crossed giving her a cocky glance that makes her want to die and kill him at the same time. 
The two had a stand-off for a bit before one decided to speak up.
"As long as I don't have to scavenge this creepy forest for wood then its fine by me" the girl said walking back to him while his eyes following her every movement till she was a few steps away from him. The girl went to grab something from her pocket with her left hand and with her right, she grabbed the boys arms and dragged her hand down it, to his hand which automatically opened up. She placed something cold into it with her left hand.
He looked at her and she had a glint in her eyes he hadn't seen for the past 12 hours, looking to his palm, he was a coin. Not just any ordinary coin or ordinary drachma. It was a coin from sea life, the one coin they give to one another which can be used for many thing, they talked it over before the quest. The coin can only be used for 2 things during this quest, to make sure the other doesnt die, or the person who has been handed the coin has to do what the person giving the coin wants no matter what.
He looked up at her with a confused look but seeing the mischief in her eyes gave enough away. Sighing he pocketed the coin and stepped away from the tree which only left 3 steps in-between the two. 
"What do you want me to do" not even bothering arguing.
"I want to see you fail at making a fire" she said just giving him the brightest smile, basically oozing sunlight from her. The boy felt like a deer stuck in headlights in that moment, he almost forgot the reason for her heavenly smile. He wanted to tell her he loved her right there and then, that he could never get enough of her, that he searched for her in every room he ever walked into, that she was the one and only constant source of light in his life, that she was the sun and he would orbit her in every universe no matter how close he got, no matter how much it destroyed him. He was utterly inconsolable without her. He loved her.
"Aurora" the boy started to say, in a serious tone which immediately made the girl's smile falter as she looked into his eyes, he didnt need to say anything. His eyes spoke more words than he would have liked, enough for the girl to get the message and understand him. All of the glances, the subtle touches, the comfort of each other like no other. She felt and understood it all. 
He was about of continue when a roar sounded, echoing in all directions and rustling the trees. The two could hear the howl of Cerberus all around them. Percy immediately uncapped riptide while Aurora unclasped her bracelet which turned into a bow and an unlimited supply of arrows. 
The both circled back to back, covering each others blind spot like muscle memory. They could feel the ground shake with each step the otherworldly creature took. 
"How are we going to do this?" the girl asked while keeping an eye on all of her surroundings. 
"You distract with your arrows as they are long-range and while she's focused on you, I'll go for the kill shot"
"She can't die" she could feel him rolling her eyes as the words left her mouth.
"You know what I mean" 
They could hear the low growl from the side of them. The three-headed beast emerged in all its glory with its 6 menacing eyes ready to rip these two teens to shreds and send the wrong beings in this equation to the underworld. Percy turned to stand next to Aurora and the girl grabbed his hand and squeezed to which he immediately responded. There were many unspoken words that had been said in the past 10 minutes and this was another addition 'dont die, be safe, come back to me'.
Slipping through her fingers, his hand left hers and quietly stalked away before the beast could get any idea there were 2 of them. Wishing the best for the boy, she instantly got the dogs attention by shooting an arrow at the middle head's nose. 
It did not like that.
They all barked at once and got ready to run at the girl. She didn't like to admit it but she was fucking terrified. Cerberus ran at her and she leapt to the side and ran as fast as she could not looking back until she could feel he's a little away from her. She got another arrow ready in her bow and blindly shot it behind her. 
She heard a small whimper which brought a smirk to her face but that was immediately wiped away as she heard the barking intensify. Hiding behind a tree the girl caught her breaths and looked for the hound and she couldnt spot it or Percy. She got another arrow ready and looked behind the tree once again but was faced with the thing she was hunting. 
Fear spread to every part of her body and she had no time to brace the impact as the dog clawed the tree which in return clawed her. She let out a bloodcurdling scream as she was flung into another tree. The bark from the destroyed tree splintered her, her head hit against a tree on impact and the large gash on her side felt like a fire that was melting her skin off. The girl felt her breath stick in her throat, she felt as though she was dying as immense pain filled her and black spots invaded her vision. Only one other thing was on her mind.
Percy.
The ocean eyed boy lost sight of Cerberus immediately as it began to chase Aurora, his Aurora. He followed as fast as he could not wanting anything bad to happen to the girl he loved before he got any chance to be with her, to confess and to just live a life content with his feelings. 
As he heard, the whoosh of Aurora's arrows increase, he could feel himself being uncapable of keeping up with the beast from the underworld and he cursed himself for it. He lost sight of Cerberus and it scared him, it was too quiet. He couldn't hear the creature or the girl he loved. 
His heartbeat quickened as he looked all around him trying to see a glimpse of either of them. 
Then all blood drain out of his face when he heard the one sound he wished he did not have to hear, ever. Aurora's scream made his heart almost leap out of his chest. He didnt know what to do, he didnt know where she was, he couldnt see the hound, its his fault, she going to die because of him. 
She most certainly is going to die if you dont get a fucking move on, that one voice in his head said. And he pushed all the doubts to the back of his head and focused on 2 things. Defeating Cerberus and finding Aurora. 
He could hear the three-headed dogs footsteps and instantly ran to it. It didnt see him coming and it's tail was on the ground so he didnt the best thing he could think of. He ran up the tail onto the body of the beast.
This elicited loud barking from the beast and Percy could only do one thing. Repeatedly stab the dog until it dissolved. 
Now... admittedly, this was not a good strategy. It was fucking awful. There was no thought to his stabs, they all just angered the beast and considering she was quite resistance to stabs, it wasnt helping. He was just tiring himself out. 
He then has the genius idea of stabbing the beast in the eye, or eyes. He started with the left head. The beast let out a large whimper, and stumbled which cause the boy to almost loose his grip on it. He wasnt going to stop now, he needed to send Cerberus back and get to Aurora.
Aurora. Her scream was echoing in his mind. Bouncing around his skull like he has no brain inside, only her gut-wrenching scream.
He subtly shook his head. As much as he was dreading where she was and if she was okay. He needed to secure Cerberus and he needed all attention to so it as fast a possible to get back to his sunshine.
He then stabbed riptide into both the right heads eyes. Percy knew what to expect this time so he braced himself and held on as tight as he could. He could not fail now. He was too close.
The dog slumped onto the floor which made percy's last task much more easier. With agility and caution the boy leapt onto the middle head and punctured the eyes out which evoked a whimper which made the boy feel bad for the animal and it slowly turned to dust. 
In an instant the boy caught his breath and his mind raced with only one thing. 
Aurora.
"Aurora! Sunshine! Where are you?" The boy felt as though he could not breathe. His head was spinning trying to find her in the mountains of trees and in the darkness of this forest, he has never needed to see her more now than any other time. 
"Aurora! Please if you can hear me make a sound! Anything so I know you're alive" He would never leave her. He would die before he left her to rot in these woods. He would never be able to face the guilt and loss.
"Please! Say SOMETHING" he could feel himself getting frustrated. "HELP! SOMEONE, ANYONE" tears welded in his eyes trying to find her. 
There was a rustle of leaves from the left side behind him. He was running to the sound before it even registered in the back of his mind. He kept hearing the rustling and a small whimper. 
He saw a faint glow of light behind a tree and he held his breath for the sight that was to come. He skidded to a stop and fell on his knees infront of her.
His heart dropped to his stomach when he saw her. Her face was significantly paler than when he left her and she had a wood splinter sticking out of her thigh and worst of all, the 4 claw marks across her abdomen with blood everywhere, it seemed to have stopped pouring, but it was a nauseating sight to see. He didnt know what to do. 
"Aurora, darling, open your eyes" his hands reached her cheeks and his thumb rubbed circled on her cheek and his two fingers made their way to her neck to check her pulse. He let out a sigh of relief when he felt a pulse. It was faint but not too faint to the point it would slip too far out of his grasp. 
He reached for his bag on his back to get some first aid supplies, ambrosia and nectar for the girl, when she let out a pained gasp.
The girl had barely an recollection of anything, the only thing on her mind at the moment was the immense pain shooting through her whole body, It felt like she was on fire and couldnt breathe. She wanted to die.
Then her vision cleared and she saw the golden haired boy looked at her like she was the only thing in the whole world, he held so much worry in his eyes that she thought for a second if she was already dead and it was her spirit seeing his reaction to her death.
"Gods, Aurora, you're okay. You had be so worried, I was terrified, I cannot lose you. If I lost you I would lose myself" The boy held one hand to her cheek while speaking so intently to her.
In that one moment she could feel his stare, like clockwork, bubble something inside of her. It almost made her forget why she was on the ground, why she could taste something metallic in the back of her mouth, why she couldnt move her right leg. It almost took it away. Almost.
That fire spread throughout her body again and she couldnt stop the wail that left her mouth. The pain was nauseating. A flood of curses left Percy's mouth as he grabbed the bottle of nectar and opened it.
"Okay, sunshine, I know you're in a lot of pain but I'm going to give you some nectar, you need to drink it but you need to sit up a little straighter." The girl immediately shook her head as a no in response to the boy. 
"I know. The amount of times we've both had to do it but you know deep down that its the only thing that will fix it." The girl tried to harden her stare at the boy but she was too weak to even look at him properly.
"O-okay, but... I can't" she inhaled sharply as she tried to move the slightest bit. She didn't have to finish her sentence for the boy to understand what she was trying to say. He took one his flannel button ups from his bag, scrunched it up and gave it to her. She could only give him a confused look.
"Put it in your mouth, bite down hard cause I'm gonna move you into the right position and its gonna be a pain. I'm sorry sunshine but I have to." She took it with her shaking hands and was about to put it in her mouth when she smelt it, sea salt and musk, then the girl really looked at what the item of clothing was. 
"this is yours" she said in a hoarse voice, looking up at him, confusion plastered all over her features.
"Well I dont exactly know where your bag is so next best thing." he gave her a weak smile and moved closer to her but she weakly grabbed his hand.
"I'm scared" she whispered so pathetically but the boy understood, he knew her. He knew that he needed to keep talking to her, to make sure he is doing something close enough to her for her to know that she's still alive. 
He only interlaced their fingers and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand. 
"I won't let go, I promise. You aren't leaving me, not after everything we have been through together" the girl's eyes welled with tears but she nodded and stuffed her mouth with Percy's flannel. 
He wrapped his arms around her from the side, where he was sitting and placed a kiss in the hair before counting down.
"3...2..." the boy didnt get to 1 before he pulled her up so she was sitting not laying down and with the movement came muffled screams and tears that flowed down the girls face. He was whispering sweet nothings in her ear as she lent into him and he repeatedly kissed her hair or forehead. 
"I'm sorry sunshine, I really am. When you're all better I promise you can hit me" he tried to uplift her but she could barely hear him. Her body shook and agony filled her every sense. He couldn't even express the guilt and regret he felt for the girl, immediately grabbing the nectar, and slowly taking his flannel out of her mouth. 
"You're doing great sweetheart" he says while slowly pouring the nectar into her mouth. Her head is resting against his shoulder as she swallows the drink down in small sips. After she drank it, Percy put it away and the girl began to close her eyes.
"Hey, hey, sunshine you can't be doing that right now. Come on I need to patch you up and then we need to get back to camp, I'll call blackjack. I know how much you like riding on him" he lifts her head off his shoulder and places her on the tree, but this time sitting up so he has easy access to her abdomen. 
She opened one eye and slightly smiled at the boy.
"You're gonna call blackjack?" the girl asked a bit delirious but seemingly in less pain. This brought a instant smile to him as he let out a chuckle, nodding his head while grabbing gauze and 2 bandage rolls.
"I promise I will, but you have to make sure to keep fighting okay. Once this is over, I have something special to tell you" He came loser to the girl and her breath slowed for a moment. 
He looked at her abdomen and a thought crossed his head that made blood rush to his cheeks, he was thankful the girl was delirious and it was dark or else he would simply wallow away. He cleared his throat and looked back up to the girl.
"I'm going to have to cut your shirt off so I can access the cuts and clean them properly" he looked into her eyes once but couldnt face her after that.
"okay" she whispered in return, locking her eyes onto his every move. 
The boy went back into his bag and grabbed a pair of scissors then faced the girl again. He could feel her watchful eyes on him the entire time and he hated to say it but that small voice in the back of his head was wishing she was a bit more delirious right now so he wasnt under her scrutiny while undressing her. Clearing his throat again, he begins to speak.
"Just tell me when to slow down or when to stop, if it gets too painful for you and I'll stop and slow down, okay" he looked to her for reassurance and an okay, to which she nodded.
He didn't know how to position himself so he just opted for kneeling next to her, facing her. He then grabbed the scissors and started to cut her top. Starting from the bottom to the top. As he reached the first claw mark the girl hissed as the shirt was stuck to the wound due to all the dried blood. Percy automatically stopped what he was doing. 
"No, no, keep going, don't stop now otherwise we will never get this done and I can't go back to camp cause I'll be dead" her honey-brown eyes were glossed with tears and the boy just wanted to hold her in his arms until the end of time in a place where they aren't fighting monsters all the damn time and in a place where they can settle down, have fun and just enjoy their life like regular teenagers.
"Don't say that so casually, you are not going to die. Not when you have me. Not when I'll always be here for you, patching you up, nursing you back to health forever. I will never in a million years let you die. I swear on the river Styx." 
She couldn't say anything to him, he will always render her speechless. She just nodded her head as tears cascaded down her cheeks to which he wiped away and placed a kiss on her forehead. Feeling the warmth off eachother brought a sense of peace to them that no one else could ever fill. 
He finished wiping her tears away and then continued cutting her shirt away from the wound. Every time she hissed, winced or flinched, the boy had the overwhelming urge to stop everything he was doing as long as it stopped bring her more pain. Whenever this would happen, the girl would softly squeeze his knee, as her hand was resting there to make sure he was still close to her and was still okay and breathing. 
This reassured him immensely but it did not stop him from the guilt that was drowning him. This would not have happened if it wasn't for him. She would not be in this position right now if he just chose someone else to go on the quest with. She had almost died due to his decision making. He chose her, he told her the plan, the plan that put her straight into danger, he didnt even second guess his choice, he put her into the battlefield without even asking her properly. Whatever he said went. 
The boy had not realised that during his intense self-loathing session, he zoned out and stopped the task at hand.
"Perce?" the girl asked while bringing her hand from his knee to his bicep. "Are you okay? whats going on in your kelp filled brain?" she said with a half smile as the boy looked up at her.
"Nothing, its okay. Just zoned out for a sec" he replied in an instant, looked away from her and continued to cut her shirt away. He was almost at her breasts and he could feel himself getting a bit hot. Obviously, there was no reason to in this situation but just being so close and intimate to her in a non sexual way made him flustered, he couldn't even imagine of it was in a sex- STOP. He shouted at his brain.
She let out a whimper of pain and a few laboured breaths as Percy carefully peeled her shirt of off the biggest wound she had. Her hand squeezed his knee harder than he would have liked her to but it didnt matter, not anymore, not when he caused this, not when he was the reason for her pain. 
He finally got it off the biggest cut and last cut and now he just had to cut the rest of the shirt off. No big deal right?
WRONG. 
The boy was telling himself to suck it up and just cut the rest of her shirt off but he was flustered. It was times like this that made him remember he was just a boy. He was just a boy with a silly crush. Except it isnt a 'silly crush' he was utterly in love with the girl. He tried to clear his head and at the same time, cleared his throat while he cut higher. 
He could feel her eyes watching him, he could feel how fast her heart was racing and he could feel how fast his own was racing. It was as though their hearts were in sync. Every beat was the same. 
Yes the girl felt flustered in this situation, she also couldn't help but want to tease the boy she loved. The girl had always grown up with a life where she never 'loved' anyone, not truly. To her love was always a very strong word in her dictionary but whatever she felt for Percy Jackson it was so powerful she felt as though she needed a word more meaningful than love. 
A word that expressed how everytime she thought of him, that specific memory of him will be branded in her brain forever to the point where even Hera could never make her forget him or forget the way he makes her feel.
He makes her feel alive, the most alive shes every felt in her 16 years of life.
"Are you blushing water boy?" the girl asked him with a half smile on her face and eyes half opened as she felt a sharp pain run through her, while also trying to control her own breathing at the same time. Percy didn't respond, he only kept cutting her shirt off, fingers lightly brushing over the material of her bra. 
She held her breath when he did that, whether it was on purpose of not, the feeling it sent through her body made her want to repeatedly bash her head against a solid wall while ripping her eyes out... in a good way of course. 
Percy finally cut her shirt fully off and it just slid down her arms and bunched at the bottom, near the tree. She felt exposed and could feel the goosebumps on her exposed skin. Percy didn't waste any time and grabbed a clean towel and his water bottle.
Before he could drenched it in water, she stopped him by kicking him with her uncompromised leg to indicate he needed to stop. This instantly stopped him and caused him to look at her. 
"Give me the water bottle before you soak the towel, if the water is warm it will work better and not hurt as much so i'll just heat it up" Percy thought about it for a second before he retaliated.
"You already aren't well enough to get off the ground, how on earth are you going to make it back to camp if you drain yourself of more energy. I know its going to hurt but it will either way, but getting you back to camp is the priority at the moment" Percy didnt want to say those words to the girl, he felt so bad for her and he couldn't help but blame himself. And when he looked into her eyes, like really looked into her eyes after he said that, he wished he could take it back.
Just looking at her made him want to give into her. 
"I can take it, I promise, I'll be okay enough to get back to camp, but I'm telling you now Percy, if I feel anymore extreme pain, I will just end up passing out. Please just let me do this." she tried to move closer to the boy but forgot about the fact that she literally could not move a single inch without his help. 
This just lead the boy to wrap his arm around her back and lent her against the tree again. He looked at her with a stern look.
"Okay, you win. But you have to promise on the river Styx that you will preserve every other bit of your energy for the ride back home." 
"I swear on the River Styx that I will preserve every other bit of my energy for the ride back to camp" He gave her one last look before giving her the water bottle. She focused some most of her energy to her hands and they started to glow. She took the bottle from percy's hand and he could feel the warmth radiate off of her. 
He looked at her in awe but if anyone else was there they would have told you that the boy was love struck. She opened her eyes and made sure to not boil the water. As it was simmering, she gave the bottle back to the boy and he instantly uncapped it and poured the, now warm, water onto the towel. 
"This is going to hurt... a lot, and by a lot i mean a lot, you might want to brace yourself" the boy said as he gave his flannel back to her and some ambrosia for her to eat before they start the painful part of fixing her up.
Aurora took both and muttered a small thanks under her breath before eating the ambrosia which was very pleasant to chew and then stuffed percy's flannel in her mouth again. She felt so weird but if she didnt and someone heard her scream bloody murder, they would get caught and the police would want them... again.
His ocean blue eyes met her honey eyes and he shared a look of regret and guilt before he wiped the dried blood away, starting from the bottom of her abdomen. She instantly clenched her jaw and recoiled as agony ran through her and her hand immediately shot out to grab Percy's wrist in a painfully tight hold to stop him from further cleaning the wounds that caused her pain.
"Sunshine, I know its painful, but I have to do this, I'm going to do this as fast and gently as I can but I will have to be rough at times" he gently takes his freehand to clasp over hers and took it of him and intertwined them while speaking to her. 
In his favour, it seemed that the energy it took the girl to warm the water up finally caught up with her as her hand lost most of its grip and her eyes closed slightly. He chuckled slightly and placed her hand back down next to her before continuing what he was doing.
He carefully but efficiently cleaned the areas surrounding her wounds while she was rejuvenating. He would hear muffled noises from time to time but other than that she was essentially knocked out. As he finished she seemed to feel less tired and her eyes opened wider than they did before.
"I'm almost finished sunshine, did you like your nap?" the boy questioned with a smirk but deep down he was glad that she kept her promise and she would have enough energy to go back to camp.
The girl nodded and looked at her abdomen. It was really clean and the wounds were barely bleeding anymore but she was fucking freezing. She shivered a little bit and percy could tell instantly.
"I've just got to bandage you up then you can put a jumper on. Okay?" he reassured her while taking the sterile dressing, he placed it over the 4 slashes and began to unwrap the dressing to bandage her up.
They both soon found the position to be quite awkward. 
Percy needed to bandage her whole abdomen which needed him to wrap the dressing over her back but she was lent up against the tree without a shirt on and unable to move to do it herself. He stopped to think of a good way to do this.
"Okay, I've got it. I'll lean you up against me and bandage your abdomen from behind." The girl thought for a bit before she agreed and the boy got up so he was only seen in her peripheral vision. He hooked his arms under hers and moved her along the ground to sit inbetween his legs. The position felt very compromising for both of them but it needed to be done.
She could feel his warm breath on her cold neck and she felt the urge to pass away because if thats how she passed, she would not mind. She held her breath as Percy begun wrapping her abdomen, she could barely feel the pain cause all she could think about and feel was him.
His breath on her neck, his fingers brushing her skin, how carefully he was handling her, like she would break at the wrong touch. He was everything she wanted, everything she needed. Everything they both deserved.
He quickly finished wrapping her up and he mentally called Blackjack from where ever he was right now. Before he could move or start to get things sorted he just looked at Aurora. She was peaceful. She looked ethereal under the moonlight, though she did look better under direct sunlight.
He decided to just stay still for a bit and wrapped an arms around the girl loosely as to not injure or hurt her more. They just needed some rest, no matter how long or short it was.
Both Aurora and Percy could hear the flap of Blackjacks wings so he quickly moved the girl back to lean against the tree while he packed everything away. Not before making sure to torniquet the girls leg where the wood piece was still protruding out of it. He made the decision before to not take it out as they both did not know how severe the injury underneath it was.
Percy grabbed a warm, woolly jumper from his bag and a blanket and gave both items to the girl before zipping it up.
"I'm going to find your bag and your bracelet before we leave, and before you say anything. I'm going to call Blackjack here to be with you before I look for them" he stated as he got up.
"Thanks a lot Perce, but before you look, how am I meant to put this jumper on without raising my arms and disrupting my bandages" Percy felt like an idiot. He dropped his bag back on the ground and knelt next to her carefully putting the jumper through one arms hole, then the next, then her head through.
Percy would never admit it there and then but he always loved when the girl would wear his clothes. It sent a warm fuzzy feeling through him knowing she was wearing his clothes, especially when she was willingly wearing his clothes. 
Similarly, Aurora would never admit it there but having Percy help her get changed into his clothes and help clean her up made her fall even more in love with him if that was even possible. She felt as though she was just falling into deep pit everytime he did anything for her or even just looked her way. 
He finished by wrapping her up in the blanket and chuckled when he saw how she looked... Exactly like a burrito. 
Blackjack came down and the girls eyes instantly widened at the sight of the creature. To which the boy just smiled at. Before he left to retrieve her bag and bracelet which were very easy to find. He quickly arrived back to the girl and Pegasus and was met with an adorable sight.
The Pegasus was on the floor next to the girl and was almost hugging her with its wing. Percy didnt think he could fall in love with the girl again but she has gone and proved him wrong, like always. 
"I've got your things sunshine, and I know its going to hurt but I'm going to have to pick you up to put you on Blackjack. Is that okay?" He knelt next to her and she nodded.
He wrapped an arm around her back and one under her knees, making sure not to hit the piece of wood and picked the girl up, quite easily, bridal style. It make them both feel fuzzy and warm inside. Even blackjack could feel the warmth.
He placed her sitting on the Pegasus so she would be infront of him when he got on. He then grabbed both of their bags and got onto blackjack himself. 
"You'd normally need to hold on tight to blackjack but I'll hold you okay? Just rest" The boy whispered in her ear as he gave her a peck on her cheek while she slowly drifted off and leaned her head back onto the boy's shoulder.
"Blackjack, No crazy flying today. We aren't at war today, its a rest day. Just take us back to camp, quick but not to the point we normally fly." Blackjacks reply left Percy with pink staining his cheeks and they made their way back to camp.
______________________________________________________________
OH MY FUCKING DAYS, I AM NEVER WRITING ANYTHING THIS LONG AGAIN
(such a fucking lie)
But I have to honest, apart from the small mental breakdowns. This was really fun to write. I love these two soo much.
When I went into this, I wanted to actually get them back to camp and I wanted them to confess but it was getting tooooooo long for that so if anyone wants a part 2, I'll gladly make it. Please dont critique me too much, this is still my first imagine 😭😭😭
I LOVE YOU ALL ❤️❤️❤️
unless you piss me off
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emuthec0w · 6 months
Text
Scars Make You Beautiful.
Kinktober Special: Mahito
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CW: Mahito (ik how many people DESPISE this man), knifeplay, gore, c7tting, GN!Reader, extensive teasing, yandere!mahito
A/N: Sorry for not uploading more and answering asks, I’ve been in a bit of a slump but I at least owed you guys some fics on the last 3-4 days of Kintober <3
Btw, I write JJK now!
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“Aw-ha! Don’t look at me like that, it makes me a little sad..”
You sighed at the memory of Mahito smiling playfully, wiping a fake tear from his eye. Surprise, surprise, Halloween would just so happen to be Mr. Patchworks’ favorite holiday! You didnt know if you should laugh or cry with this information. On top of never being left alone in your torture cell of a bedroom you’d have to deal with his ‘spooky’ games. Things he’d maybe found online or heard whispers of near shrines in the dark of the night when the only friend you had was the moon. Even that vanished sometimes.
You were unsure if you’d even consider Geto your friend. No, he couldn’t be. He worked with Mahito. He made sure you could never leave. All for the sake of pleasing that selfish, child-like curse. If he wasnt coddling you and watching your every move he’d send other curses to do so, and to say the very least it was mind numbing. It was awkward. It was degrading. You, all dressed up in either frilly or gothic outfits (depending on Mahito’s mood), being babysat by curses who could kill you in an instant if they really wanted to.
As you lied in bed staring at the over-decorated ceiling you felt a grumble bubble from your stomach to your throat. Your gaze fixed from picture to picture, each printed from a polaroid camera of you. You in the shower, you in bed, you putting on your work uniform, pantyshots that you weren’t even sure how he’d gotten- all strong across the ceiling. Almost as if it was something he was proud of. 5 months. It had been 5 whole months since your abduction.
As far as you knew, no one bothered to come looking for you. No one cared. No one questioned a thing when you disappeared! Maybe your boss threw a fit when he realized he couldnt shove loads of overtime onto your shoulders anymore, but that was probably it. What other substantial role did you really play in your life? Everyday was the same cycle it’s been for the past 19 years. It didnt matter at all.
It never did.
Maybe, just maybe, being with Mahito put some spice in your life! It added some pizazz! But god, what were you thinking? You hated this. More than anything in the world. The things you were forced to see would permanently alter the course of your life’s trajectory. The look of terror as you watched humans become monsters in mere seconds.. their pleas for help.. their pleas for death..
You’d never be the same.
Your head shot up the moment you heard the door to your room slip open, then closed once more. From the stairs that led down to it a familiar blue-haired boy peeped his head down. He had a wild grin on his face as he stared at you, and you felt yourself become ill. What was he planning now?..
“It’s Halloween! Doll, do you know what that means?”
In his hands he held a bag, one filled with amazing new goodies he’d gotten after brainstorming with his curse friends on what to do for this Horrifying Holiday! He was so excited he swore he was shaking, giddy as he made his way towards you. You slowly sat up, and before you’d fully balanced yourself he plopped down by your side and leaned all his weight onto you, nuzzling your shoulder happily.
For such a beast, he could act like such a kid. But, your thoughts immediately swayed on that subject as he covered your eyes. Even if you couldn’t see it, you could just feel that sadistic smile of his grow as his gaze fell upon you. You always felt vulnerable around him. How could you not? He was an all-capable curse, and you were.. weak. You weren’t a sorcerer. You didn’t know a thing about Jujitsu. So how could you not be afraid?
“W..Whhat does it mean?” You breathed, eyes closed under his stitched-up palm. He pouted, a small groan of disappointment pushing past his throat.
“You dont know? Oh well, I guess that makes it more of a surprise!”
You took in a sharp breath as you heard him fiddle with the bag he’d brought home with him. You wondered if this was a trick question, and maybe he’d grant you the mercy of strangulation with it if you were lucky.
“I got us some goodies! I know you’ll just love them!” Mahito smiled, and before you could get anything out in response you felt his hand at the side of your neck. “Now, no panicking okay? That screaming thing you do is cute but IIIII~~… don’t wanna deal with it now! Got that?”
You nodded. What else could you do? As he slowly removed his cold hand from your eyes you took in several deep breaths to try to compose yourself. But really how could you? Shaky breathing and a stoic nature was as calm as you could get around him. Your eyes fluttered for a moment before opening and readjusted to the room’s dull light. Fearfully, your gaze made it to his hand. He was holding something in it.. but you.. couldn’t tell what.
You swallowed down some saliva, and he noticed this almost immediately. He pursed his lips, before they formed into a small— innocent, smile.
“I got us a fun play-time toy! Isn’t that fun? Doesn’t it make your ‘heart’ flutter?” He paused, glancing to the side for a moment, “Well, not your heart. Humans don’t have those! Uhh.. does it make your soul flutter?”
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at his witty pickup lines. You nodded your head, a gentle smile plastering over your face. It was the least you could do.. because how dare you be ungrateful for what all he does for you, right?
“Mm.. yes.” You pressed your cheek to the rim of his hand which still caressed your neck, eyes narrowing. “T-Thanks..”
A look of thrill overtook his expression at your answer, and you felt your mouth fall agape as the sensation of a blade slashed against the smooth skin of your neck. He’d jerked his hand back and.. cut you. And now as you bled he leaned forward and licked the wound, tongue pressing into it and licking away all blood that attempted to slip out. Each time you whined his tongue slipped deeper, and he even began biting the skin around the cut after a bit of teasing it.
He always felt so incredibly drunk off of your love. It was so damn addicting.. so intoxicating. And god, you would never admit that this treatment drove you crazy as well sometimes. You bucked your hips under the covers expectantly, eyes shutting. He set his other hand on your thigh, squishing it in his calloused palm as you squirmed. His thumb rubbed circled around your inner thigh, eyes narrowed on your core.
It didnt take a genius to figure out you were getting off on his teasing, and he couldn’t help but give a you a smug grin upon realizing it. You huffed, eyes watering a little as the wound he’d given you began to sting immensely.
“Oh? Are you enjoying this doll?” He eagerly questioned, “I’m so happy! You usually never like my attempts at this stuff… and this one just so happens to be my favorite too~!”
Before you could respond he brought his hand up and began slicing rapidly into your soft skin, blood trickling down your arms and legs. Several mouths sprouted from Mahito’s stitched up skin, pale tongues lapping at the bleeding slits made by his knife. Once he’d finished bloodying you up he brought his knife back and set it on the bedside counter near where your head lay. Watching you wince he licked his lips, eyes narrowing with glee.
“Now, the real fun begins!”
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violetwitch12087 · 11 months
Note
Could you do the evans reacting to finding out that your pregnant with their child 🤭🤭
UH OF COURSE I CAN THIS IS ACTUALLY A REALLY GOOD IDEA I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS I DID MY BEST
The evans reaction to finding out you're pregnant and its theres
Evan Peters
*you tell him*
IMMEDIATE happiness
Hes shocked and then when you tell him fr a big smile comes across his face and he engulfs you into a hug
Would prob shed some tears or a lot
Kisses you so passionately
Holds you in his arms for HOURS
Tells his parents how happy he is
"evan uhm im pregnant" "wait youre serious?" *Nod* "OMG baby im so happy"
Tate Langdon
Straight panic
Scared he made the anti christ again
Sad because it killed you
You have to comfort him but he just cries and tells you how sorry he is
Honestly maybe would avoid you for a bit bc he hates himself and when he sees you he remembers what he did
After a while when you die and stuff he'll be there for you while you die holding your hand crying and kissing your knuckles
Yall would be fine after but until the apocalypse happens👍
"tate im- im pregnant" "w-what? I- im so sorry its all my fault"
Kit Walka (ik its walker i jst love the way he says it)
Would look down at the test and smile and hug you
"we're gonna have a third little baby here?"
Honestly really, really happy
Kisses you and hugs you swaying side to side
Later on would listen to his favorite music and dance with you before kissing you and putting his hands on your belly
"kit im pregnant" "what?" *Sees test* *big ole smile* "we're gonna have a third little one running around here?" *Nod*
Kyle Spencer (pre death)
Honestly a little concerned/considering it because hes in college and still lives with his mom
Would make it your choice if you want to keep it but if you do we would be there every single step and moment of the way
Honestly after a while of thinking would be so happy to have a little you guys running around
After thinking and accepting it and loving it he would apologize for even considering it and would kiss you and hold you
"kyle i know we're young but i- im pregnant" "wait really?" *Sees test* "i- i dont know what to say i mean i love you i really do and you know that but we're young but if you want to keep it ill be here no matter what baby"
*later on after thinking* "baby im so sorry for everything i said i wanna have a baby with you ive never been happier please forgive me, im so excited to have this journey with you"
How could you say no
Jimmy Darlin (yes ik its darling)
Very very happy
Then his smile starts to fade
Sad because he doesnt want your guy's kid to have his condition
Also sad because his kid is gonna grow up the way he did
You comfort him and tell him its all okay and that you guys wont let anything happen to the kid
Apologies for how he couldnt take you guys out of the freak show and all that jazz
You comfort him and lets jst say like at the end of freak show you and Jimmy live a normal life with your big ole belly and jimmy by your side all the steps of the way
"jimmy omg im pregnant" "really?" *His beautiful smile*
After a bit "im so sorry i couldnt give you and our only kid a normal life i really am" "jimmy i love you we will figure it out and you know we will"
James Patrick March
Genuinely shocked
Didnt even know you and him could have kids since well hes a ghost
But 'miracles' happen
Honestly surprisingly happy to have a little you guy's running around the hotel
"if you need anything i will have someone get it for you my love" he says that and also means that he will have someone that can go outside get you stuff as well
"james im pregnant" "i can procreate?" *Nods* "well, i could never be happier dear"
Kai Anderson
Honestly would probably be nice to you for once like with ally
Happy because there is now a 'messiah'
Wants the kid to lead the cult when he dies
Would be so happy i mean did you see him with ally and their damn kid?
He would start being more gently like he would look at your belly and smile putting his big hand on top of it
I mean he would probably even kiss your head and give you cuddles here and there
I mean how could he not? You're holding the next most precious and important thing in his life or probably the kid is his most precious and important thing
"kai dont get mad but im pregnant, and its yours" *a small smile would come across his face* "really? I honor you as the most loyal in this cult you're holding the next messiah"
Peter Maximoff (wanda vision age)
Honestly shocked
Would be so happy tbh
Would be happy because he would have another probably immature kid that was fast like him
Would probably pull you into a hug and kiss you and would hold you like forever while you guys slept every night
Would go into a frenzy about you needing rest and him stealing your favorite snacks a stuff just to make you happy i mean hes a kleptomaniac
"peter im pregnant" "YES omg were gonna have another speedster here"
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away-ward · 8 months
Note
this michaelrika kaibanks just ruined everything for me. especially considering banks is my favorite character and i only continued with the series so i could get crumbs of her(which didn happen thanks to pd always favouring rika and thrusting her into situations where she is not needed). honestly, that bonus scene does not sound like banks AT ALL. her worrying about how her how "family" doesnt love her enough after 10 damn years made me want to break something especially since pd made it out like they all adore and love Rika while making banks feel like she was not part of the inner circle. moreover if emory would have become good friends with any one in that weird-ass grp it would have been with banks but NO pd has to make it all about rika..in a bonus scene... about Banks. idk why no one is talking abt that. and this is so against the found family theme pd set up in the books.
kai kai kai what do i even say abt this guy. past kai was such a gem. like i will fight anyone who says otherwise. him and banks were SO DAMN CUTE but the present one.. not so much. in the bonus scene banks asks rika did she go around walking knowing that she could have had kai again and again if banks didnt come into the picture. i think kai WOULD HAVE had rika again if he hadnt found banks and i cant just ignore it no matter how much i try. also why is kai ALWAYS going "rika this rika that" even after he found banks. ik everything and every character in the dn universe is about rika coz pd created them but it is just disturbing kai is like this even though he knows that makes banks uncomfortable.
i was so excited when pd said she was gonna write a bonus scene for dn but MY GOD I WISH I DIDNT READ WHATEVER THE HELL THAT WAS IN HER FACEBOOK. and to think this might be the last kai banks scene we ever get... makes me wanna cry. they deserve so much more. there might be more bonus scenes in that universe but it sure as hell wont be abt kaibanks knowing pd (i mean she did them dirty in their own book making the main focus damon and rika)
ohhh i almost forget about the conclave scene where kai knows about rikas situation before michael. i mean wtf is this even. and when banks get upset rika had the audacity to feel betrayed. after everything kai said to banks in hideaway abt how she is the one he looks for every morning, this scene in conclave just ruined that closure. AND we didnt get to see kai and banks talk about it. of course we didnt because they are just side characters in this series right.
in my opinion, pd should rewrite the bonus and quit making Kai so 'rika-centric' and actually concentrate on how HIS OWN wife feels.
ik this is a lot kai banks but this is years of pent-up frustration over how my best girl and kai were done dirty.
and i feel like i would have liked rika so much more if pd didnt shove her down our throats like that throughout the series
pt 2 of the ask:
by the same person who wrote the kai banks rant will you ever write a fanfic on kai banks coz i have searched the internet and i couldn't find one story abt them. which is really sad since they are the only other couple who made sense apart from will and emmy. and abt my previous rant kai ONLY belongs with banks and we all know it. i mean they belong with each other no one can say otherwise. kai might have been attracted to rika but he will choose banks no matter what so that is why it is frustrating when he is made out to be like he cares abt rika as more than just a friend and more than he should.  what is your thoughts on all this
Honestly, I think you hit the nail on the head why this doesn’t sit right with a lot of us.
One, the time period. I could possibly buy this if it were set within the original series. Maybe before NF or very soon after. But ten years later makes Banks seem very insecure and childish. She’s just been living for ten years thinking that her husband is secretly lusting over what is perceivable her best friend. Or at least her closest female friendship. That doesn’t feel like Banks to me. My understanding of Banks character is that she would have addressed any issue much sooner.
And two, this was supposed to be about Banks. But what we have is Banks making Rika feel better. First, confronting her over the young girl and reminding Rika that she has nothing to feel shamed over. Then, realizing how Rika feels, confirming those feelings. And in a way, Banks realizing that her feelings around Rika were not insecurities but were in fact attraction, is about Banks. But it’s still really about how amazing Rika is, and everyone agrees.
No one is immune to Rika Fane is the point of the scene. But it's the same message we've been getting since Corrupt.
It’s frustrating because it doesn’t give found/chosen family vibes. It’s all about Rika.
And now I feel like this about her:
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kai kai kai what do i even say abt this guy. past kai was such a gem. like i will fight anyone who says otherwise.
Okay, okay. I’ll keep my fighting words to myself...
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But anyway, Kai alone frustrates me (which is super disappointing because from other’s POVs, he’s delightful and interesting). Banks makes him better. I love the two of them together. The fact that he’s given any room for Banks to develop feelings of doubt about him and Rika is so odd. There’s no argument for it.
the conclave scene where kai knows about rikas situation before michael. i mean wtf is this even. and when banks get upset rika had the audacity to feel betrayed.
See, Rika confiding in Kai didn’t bother me, because it made sense to me that she’d confide in him. At this point, Kai is one of her closest friends and I (maybe erroneously) thought of Kai as the most reasonable and comforting of the group, which is something Rika needed. It’s the jealousy and the doubt about their relationship that comes after that ruined it for me. Either Rika and Kai can be friends and nothing else, or they can’t. And PD is really pushing this “they can’t” idea with every update and bonus they post. Which is so weird.
Do you think we could challenge PD to write a couple-centric scene where none of the other couples show up, if only for us to get quality couple content?
ik this is a lot kai banks but this is years of pent-up frustration over how  my best girl and kai were done dirty.
Hey, I get it. I’m here for some kaibanks conversation. As much as Kai in the series frustrates me, Kaibanks in my head sit in the same boat as Willemmy, which is that they are cute and deserve better.
And didn’t feel like didn’t would have liked rika so much more if pd didn’t shove her down our throats like that throughout the series
Very true.
will you ever write a fanfic on kai banks coz i have searched the internet and i couldn't find one story abt them. which is really sad since they are the only other couple who made sense apart from will and emmy.
It's not that I don’t want to, but I haven’t been able to wrap my head around Kai and Banks as characters. This scene helped with Banks a little, but now Kai is harder to understand. I know there were some oneshots over on Wattpad if you have access. If I were to ever break from Willemmy, Kaibanks would probably be the next one I'm inclinded towards, though. Sorry I can’t promise anything.
kai ONLY belongs with banks and we all know it. i mean they belong with each other no one can say otherwise. kai might have been attracted to rika but he will choose banks no matter what so that is why it is frustrating when he is made out to be like he cares abt rika as more than just a friend and more than he should. 
I completely agree. I think with the way the family is set up, there would be nothing wrong with Kai thinking Rika or any of the other girls are attractive, but it should be clear that he doesn’t have the same bond/connection/relationship to them as he does with Banks. I still think back to Michael openly declaring that Rika was everything to him, and it’s strange that none of the other guys have similar moments where they remove any doubt that they want no one else.
Like, I don’t think Michael wants Banks. Or Winter. Or Em. He wants Rika and Rika’s happiness. He might think Banks is hot, but that’s probably as far as it goes.
That’s Banks. Kai’s wife, Damon’s sister. Pain in his neck.
If somebody gave Kai an ounce of that energy towards Rika, we’d have a completely different vibe.
I'm not sure what can be done to protect our sanity. I, for one, usually hate to ignore canon, but sometimes it's just... not worth acknowledging in favor of your own HC.
That might be the case here.
Let me know your kaibanks HC if you're up for it. Anyway, have a great day. Hope you forget all about the bonus scene soon!
-KO
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versadies · 2 years
Note
HIHI im back again HASKSJ i just wanna know, what are your thoughts on the new sumeru characters??!?! esp candace 👀
-🪐
OMG WELCOME BACK 🪐 I MISSED U /p <333 !!
candace? 👀 ymean cANDEEZ NUTS FIT— jkjk i like her, but disappointed w what hoyoverse did bcuz as far as ik from tiktok, her character is inspired by a real life historical figure, kandake, who is a dark-skinned woman and queen, unlike candace whose skin is tan-ish???? its sad that hyv is doing this despite the diversity ppl need and want 😔😔😔
nevertheless tho, this is not an excuse to insult designs that ppl worked hard for nor spread hate bcuz doing that wont change anything (i was so disappointed when i heard that ppl were attacking nahida’s voice actor simply bcuz nahida is yt even tho the va has nothing to do with it) — what we can do is to send our complaints to hyv’s surveys and hope theyll listen (which i sort of doubt but it doesnt hurt to hope that we get more diversity on characters) 😭😭😭
besides that tho, the same goes for the new sumeru characters, im glad they didnt do cyno dirty, i love nahida’s elemental burst and character overall, and i super find dori’s gameplay fascinating!! the one im most looking forward to is al haitham, who ill make sure will come home and be a part of the team with zhongli, childe, diluc, kaeya, ayato, itto, and thoma 👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹
p.s. i hope my comments arent offensive, i dont want this to be considered offensive to anyone bcuz thats not my intention at all
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arillusionist · 5 months
Text
reaction to the last 3 eps of s&b - im doing it all at once bc i wanna get it over with considering im gonna be rlly sad watching these knowing we'll never get a real ending.
also YES i was heartbroken over the cancellation even tho i hadnt finished the show. im emotionally attached to the books okay!! leave me alone
oh this is the hallucination scene i've heard too much about
the fucking BUTTERFLIES
bye not wylan's overly dramatic ass
"a village boy cut in half by a plow blade" isnt that literally what happened to kaz's dad
"hope is an illusion. a lie" hes such a kaz ripoff
oh i didnt think tolya had a hallucination i've never heard anyone talk about it
whos blood is that im gonna guess tamar
why am i so smart like
if they rush jesper's developement with one hallucination im gonna be mad
what happened i cant tell. he better not have rejected her again or whatever ugh theyre so cute tho
WOW i love how they always go from established relationships to some angsty kanej scene.
love how he doesnt stare at her lovingly or shit hes just fucking glaring she knows her man fr
oh never mind the soft voice is crazy
uh ya i didnt want to make assumptions until now but making inej's hallucation about kaz was Not it.
like in a way ik its about how she wants consent but its mainly so she can leave kaz at the end of the show kaz kaz kaz its always about kaz
this is why we needed the spinoff they couldve FIXED it
"erm they shouldnt have done it wrong in the first place" how righteous of you unfortunately im too emotionally attached to the characters so i wish they had another chance
ok bad choice aside her realizing its not real bc she knows kaz could never be like that or even try is kinda heartbreaking!! 🙂
oh hell no did she eat the fucking butterfly i thought it was the petal at first 🤡
"if you have no one left to fight for" and then cutting to inej aaaa
no the way his eyes softened and the way inej stroked his face w her thumb ... and then he realized
okay thank god cuz for a second i thought the crows were gonna js be dead the entire episode
hes the firebird what the fuck?? (sorry chat i havent finished r&r yet)
why does that kinda downplay malina like knowing that they're meant for each other cuz of destiny or some shit
then again they never had to fall in love just find each other they did the romance part on their own
where tf is kaz
oh what the fuck. this scene is so messed up (Talking abt the one where the darkling is holding baghra)
my laptop's screen time is almost up so i must pause unfortunately. i could watch on my phone but thats boring so
uhm so its been 3 days have i been stalling?? maybe 🙂 can you blame me??
is that old guy her husband?? uh
seeing kaz smile for more than a fleeting one second is so unnatural
oh my god oh my god is her whole speech about love not being a weakness gonna make kaz realize something
wow okay they did rush jesper's development with one hallucination
toyla is the #1 wesper shipper fr ‼️‼️💪🏽
"someday someone is going to sweep you of your feet so hard" haha nikolai
"me and my "slab or fur" will be far away, off the map, deep in love" uh babe i hate to tell you this..
not kaz shaking his head at wesper as if hes not the reason theyre together 💀
see here they go butchering inej's character again!!
like. in the books she realizes she needs to let go of kaz because she finds her purpose - hunting slavers. in this she just realizes it because of some fuckass hallucination which was about him Why Is It Always About Him
cant tell if im slightly relieved that they cancelled the spinoff because they might have ruined her more or more mad that they cancelled it because they couldve fixed it
i am eating the malina angst up 🗣️🗣️(not bc i dont like them i do like them thats why i need them to be sad. all my favorite ships need angst)
ooh he knows he knows abt mal
next episode except i have to sleep so im probably gonna watch like 2 minutes of it. but i'll try to finish this and the last one tmrw because the more i delay it the sadder i get about the cancellation though my brain wants me to believe otherwise
she (the tidemaker girl idk her name) looks so ready to punch him like yeah girl me too
help the grin on that one girls face when he says kill the king
ok 2 minutes r over so bye
and im back its only the next day also the deleted footage oh my god im on the floor?? plus the fact that it got "what business" trending on twitter with 33k tweets is so fucking funny to me
anyways.
bye i jumped when the darkling showed up in mal's room why do the smallest fucking things always scare me
oh ya theyre cousins. alina has a type huh
mal would kinda get along with inej i can feel it!!
wait whos the arm for also david is lwk smooth wow
they keep mentioning the crows but WHERE THE FUCK ARE THEY its been almost 20 minutes 😐
why that is the only tamar and nadia moment all season like not that i was expecting more from netflix but Still
oh thats the last line from the book (i havent finished r&r yet but i skipped to the end as i do with every book so. lol 💀)
omg matthias i kinda thought he wouldnt show up again
oh god i feel like this show has such a lighting problem sometimes
its bad enough that i have no idea whats going on in general
INEJ
INEJ I MISSED YOU
she gotta stop bowing down to alina she is as much of a saint
did they kill off david and genya wtf
i have to pause for a bit bc my laptop needs to charge also i still have no idea whats going on
back
no theyre (david and genya) alive yay 🙏🏽🙏🏽
what the fuck is he doing
oh OHH now theyre killing him off. how could they do that to genya
the other crows are here FINALLY
when ur entire onscreen developemnt is literally 5 minutes 😍😍👍🏽👍🏽
no i will not stop being salty about jesper. fuck you
"well if you dont die we dont get paid" shdjfk
zoya inej nina the friendship i needed
wow what a beautiful and touching moment. it feels anticlimatic but okay 🙂‼️😐👍🏽‼️💪🏽🤡🗣️🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️😭🙏🏽💪🏽🗣️
oh nvm. i keep forgetting this isnt the last episode
is that a giant CROW
lol of course it isnt
okay now its the last episode :')
"yes my man! oh we havent actually put a label on it" bye that is so jesper of him
oh. wow. she actually did it.
at least inej and zoya are being badass MY GIRLS ‼️‼️
"let me be your monster" stop being such a kaz ripoff please
FINALLY. his villain speech was taking too long
did she use merzost :(
tolya's random ass burst of poetry 💀💀
HE SEES HER
he literally cannot take his eyes off of her
I CANT. I CANT. THEY WANTED TO HUG SO BADLY YOU COULD SEE THE RELIEF IN THEIR EYES KAZ ALMOST SMILED
but she would never know what it was like for him to see nina pull her close watch jesper loop his arm through hers, what it was to stand in doorways and against walls AND KNOW HE COULD NEVER DRAW NEARER
im sick. theyre so sick for this and knowing we'll never get a chance to see them even hold hands. i cant 🙂
they way she moved towards him then moved back killing myself thnx
"five of cro-" bro predicted the ending of ck
not the malina angst too is this show trying to kill me?? i think it is
"i'll claw my way to one. if he'll let me" IM TELLING YOU!! TRYING TO KILL ME
HE LOOKED AT INEJ
SHES HIS HAPPILY EVER AFTER IM SO DONE IM GOING TO THROW MY LAPTOP ON THE FLOOR 😭😭😭😭😭😭
did they kill off david or not omg
i love how the crows just started walking away they were so eager to get out (except nina's lingering glance at zoya)
oh. oh hes going to be to be sturmhond
see hes so much like inej they both leave to the seas to find themselves outside of the person they love because they want a life for theselves and freedom
i reached the text limit imma make a new post
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invisiblerxch · 2 years
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hello. Today I gave an entrance exam for a backup (college) plan. It was my first time giving a competitive exam and it went horrible ( atleast in my head)
Reasons for why it went bad? Well there are plenty.
With the change in education system due to pandemic, everything is fast paced and completely new. I think I realize what it's like to be an adult. Not long ago I used to called myself a child but I think I need to grow up and keep up with the world now. Admittedly the main reasons for why I did bad in the exam is solely my fault. I rushed it, wasn't aware, lazy, all over the place, didn't keep with entrance exams date or the syllabus and didnt prepared for it earlier.... i could have, I should have but i did not.
Not long I didn't even wanna apply for the exams for colleges due to being tired with continously giving exams (only few weeks before I had given my last high school main exams that was a month long process)
I didn't manage my time well, I didn't take it seriously. Thinking I'll hop in the last days and you know some how make it.
That's a lie actually. These exams aren't easy.
I keep thinking about my situation.
What makes me so entitled to even think that the universe would pick me and make me smooth sail all my problems? How pathetic.
Looking at all the other peers who are giving there best for months long, have devoted time in practicing and being productive. They are better. And there is no denying.
I was foolish. And Im sad. I didn't knew that I was delusioned to the point I forgot where I stood.
I stand nowhere.
My reality is that I'm not working for my future. And that I've been ignorant for it a long time. I see other kids all aware, excited and always striking ahead in opportunities.
And what have I done ? I've been giving excuses of depression and being stuck at one point. Im simply not excited for life anymore. I fantasy about the American dream in my head uk the girl boss being rich and sh*t. But in all truth I've been having hard time grasping my life conditions. I'm aware of lot of stuff about myself. I know I'm not eating well (or at all) sleeping too much, using social media to distract myself.
I fee like my mind has degraded and my body doesn't responds to me anymore.
I've seen people moving forward. I've seen everyone I knew moving forward to the point I'm not even surprised.
A lot of things are making me bitter. I'm not smart, don't consider myself pleasing, have identity crisis and have anxiety.
I try to feel jolly good for the people around me for their friendships, hobbies, relationships, simply for how they live.
Idk why I keep them all in a pedestal but deep down I really hate seeing people being happy. Not because I want something worse for them. It's just I'm jealous because i feel that certain happiness can't be mine.
Pandemic shut me off completely. I thought I was healing and all but all I've been doing is being caved in a room. The moment I thought I was coming out of my shell the stress of multiple exams hit me. And I couldn't take it, made excuses to get lost in my dreamland and wasted time. Now I suffer.
Maybe it's me being over dramatic ( ik I am) but I learned that time really doesn't give a shit about ya. Lmao
And as I keep ranting, the more I write the more I really wanna punch myself. I sound like a crybaby.
But anyways as I come to conclusion of whatever I wrote. I think at the end I still want to pat myself in the back.
Again I did horrible in my exam and got another main one coming. I dont wanna start with extra positivity and "you'll be fine/okay" bullshit. Those words seem vague idk why...
I just want to try. I really wanna try. The entrances are country wide and is hella competitive. One side of me thinks that absolutely in no way "i" would make it. But another part of me just really wanna give my best shot.
It's just I don't know how.
How do people accomplish themselves? Ive always wondered that... maybe its time for me to adapt and learn as well.
Anyways just a rant. I kept thinking about how horrible I gave my exam today and thought by distracting I would get over it. I couldn't. I just wanted to acknowledge it.
But I got no friends who would listen to me talk this long hahah... I guess I just wanted to speak it out loud.
Universe if you listening. Pls just give me strength to believe in myself once again.
#examstress #rant #howcanthisreachouttootherpeoplesoicanfindfriends #examcoping
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caruliaa · 8 months
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can i just not have my birthday this year. 1. everyone on earth says being 19 makes you want to kill urself 2. its the wcs and dear john age. i went thru my main reason wcs and dear john are relatable when i was 14 so im either gonna b reminded constantly that im now at an age in these songs tht describe going thru smth too young when im five years older than i was when the main reason i relate to them happened or superstition tht something worse will happen 3. having people i thought of as my best friend at the time forget or not talk to me on my birthday has happened to me twice in my life already and id rather just not take my chances with it happening a third time
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fallindomino · 3 years
Text
how i would have changed s2 of hsmtmts
obvious disclaimer but im not a screenwriter or anyth so im not claiming what i want is best, this is just for fun lololol
okay so first of all nini would still have dropped out of yac but she wouldn’t have gone back to east, she would have transferred to north bc she was too ashamed to tell anyone she left at first and maybe she still wants to explore who she is away from ricky and the others
nini could join north’s batb and this way maybe we could have some playful rivalry with lily and nini and more scenes with antoine shdhdjdj also it could have been a great opportunity to flesh out lily’s character so those scenes where she reaches out to ricky and her confession at the end of the season actually make sense lol
speaking of ricky ,,, i think he should have left the play at some point hear me out. he only joined in the first place because of nini and barely wanted to do it at all once he realized he wasn’t gonna be able to perform with her. he could have joined crew and been a manager with natalie or smth considering he rlly does see the theater gang as a second family. also this would leave so much room for ej and ricky development and bants since ej joined the av club and began to pursue film. they could have some convos where idk ricky asks ej how he figured out what he wanted to do after duke didn’t work out and ricky could actually develop some interests that arent the play or nini ,,, maybe fucking art club i mean he did p good on that centerpiece for carlos’ quinceañera.
with ricky not being the beast anymore i think seb should take his place that would be soooo good. and since seb isn’t chip anymore carlos won’t make those snide comments about chip being a small unimportant role and we can just cut that whole fight bc it was dumb and bad. we could still have seb being insecure that carlos is only dating him bc there aren’t really any other gay guys at school. in a heartbeat is great and i did like ricky being supportive in the background it was kinda funny too idk dhdjdjfj
ooh i almost forgot abt rini ahshdj okay so i still think they should break up. but in my version there’s no ricky pulling an ej 1.0 and deleting comments off of nini’s insta, cause with ricky in art club and nini at north trying to figure out what she wants i think one of them would realize that they’re going in different directions and only got back tgt because they made each other feel safe cause what they had was familiar. this could be triggered by ricky mentioning smth abt nini at yac and then nini breaks down and tells him that she dropped out and is at north and doesn’t know where she’s going. and then they can both realize they aren’t good for each other rn and have a less tragic mutual break up.
honestly i really liked the scene of nini taking charge after miss jenn freaked out cause with the character detail of nini giving every person in the cast of productions she’s in a thank you note she just seems really like someone who is suited to lifting others up. this could still be explored at north, maybe she could help lily through her issues that were briefly implied in ep 11 and nini realizes she wants to be a drama teacher and encourage kids to go off book and put themselves into their acting, something she couldn’t have at yac.
okay now ej ,,, so like i said in ricky’s section, more bants between them cause i feel like friendships kinda fell by the wayside due to all the relationships so more friendship !!!! also the scene where ej tells his dad he’s not going to duke shouldn’t have been an ending scene, it should have been fleshed out with his dad pushing back saying how he pulled all these strings to get him in and ej saying he doesn’t wanna go if his own hard work couldn’t get him there. and also more scenes of ej doing av club things !!! and realizing he rlly likes film and wants to do it OMG IT WOULD BE SO COOL IF HE BROKE THE FOURTH WALL AND ASKED THE DOCUMENTARY CREW ABT THE FILM INDUSTRY god i would love that. the only scene we rlly got of ej doing film things was at the quinceañera which made me kinda sad. uhhh also i just wanted to specifically mention how ej got mr mazzara that job at cal tech bc it really showed how he wanted to be there for people not just for gina, who he had a crush on, but for mr mazzara who supported him outside of romance, so i wanna keep that for sure.
gina !!! okay so i mostly liked her arc in this season, the only changes i would make would be to flesh it out a teeny bit (god this hypothetical s2 would have to be like 22 eps at least shdjdjdjfj) anyways besides ashlyn singing home to get gina to stay i think there should be a scene where they actually talk in her room abt how gina feels safer when shes on the run (second chance reference ilysm) hhhh and also a scene of her and carlos actually working out compromises for their choreo cause i liked that bit of development too and fleshing that out would make gina an even better foil for lily, who felt a need to hog the spotlight like gina used to. with gina’s own arc fleshed out her character would feel more whole independently from romance and portwell would be even more rewarding than it is in the current s2. the only thing i would really change abt portwell is that they would kiss !!! in the finale but thats bc im biased.
ashlyn should have gotten a more fleshed out storyline about being insecure about not being a good enough belle or the typical belle. there were some throwaway lines when north did their typical dramatics but the only two real scenes that showed it were when ash talked to big red about it and when she was telling nini she wanted to do a run in “home” bc lily did it. ashlyn should get more screen time where she has to grapple with the reasons she doesn’t feel good enough and big red can still support her but also gina too bc i would like more roommate besties interaction.
kourtney could still date howie, that harry potter shit was cute but there needs to be smth else for kourtney’s arc. idk she’s still into fashion so maybe she could be out here trying to create her own line or smth? this doesn’t have to be resolved in s2 like making a wholeass line takes time and she could work on it into a potential s3. kourtney just didnt get much outside of howie and the stuff at the beginning of the season where she said nini inspired her to be independent and that's why she got a job was just dropped?? so i think that fashion could fill that for her if she’s still dating howie cause like having her whole arc just be the pizza place kinda overlaps w big red’s mini arc abt how he wasn’t settling for hospitality, its what he wants to do with his life.
ik what ur thinking. anna, even if you added more episodes, where would u find the room to add all these plotlines?? well first we cut (most of) the seblos fight, so thats some time saved. honestly most of the time that we r going to gain is going to be from cutting ms jenn’s time. things like ms jenn’s and nini’s car ride would get cut, but mostly all of ms jenn’s romances would get cut down. considering she’s the teacher and isn’t actually a character with an arc how does she have THREE love interests this season?? like all of the weird tension between her and zack can be cut, like just some short scenes of them being competitive can stay. all of the stuff with ricky’s dad can go bye bye we don’t need it. i did like her w mr mazzara so most of that can stay i just didn’t like how he said he would give up cal tech for her, ew no that would be gone.
the MENKIES !!!! this is the last thing im gonna address cause in a perfect world every character would get a long fleshed out arc but then the season would be waaay too long and also im mostly trying to work within material the show gave so this is mostly made up of “realistic” deviations from what actually happened. lol idk what that even means it just makes sense to me. but anyways!! uhhh bro idk i thought them dropping the menkies was funny but it also made the finale really BAD lmao. in this finale, seb is the beast, east still had to deal w the fact that they’re underfunded compared to north but no one is injured, lily is less of a poorly written character and maybe ppl are even rooting for her, and wow i just realized i never actually said what role i think nini should have in north’s show. OOH she could be student director instead of lily cause lily both being in the play while also directing was weird considering omg i just checked and according to her wiki page shes a FRESHMAN?? and they let her be student director? lol hell nah. okay so with all that in mind ,,, the menkies should have been the season cliffhanger instead of portwell. east and north should both be nominated, both schools perform at the menkies, and then the award winner is about to be announced and THATS when it cuts to natalie and the end of the season.
one, this actually gives more tension for a summer s3 as we would be waiting to see the consequences of whichever school won. also i bet people would be wondering if nini’s gonna be transferring back to east or staying at north. people would also prob wonder if ej would be getting the scholarship if east won and what that would mean for his interest in film.
lmao that got longggg and idk if anyone’s even gonna read this but it was fun to do :D
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wickedpact · 3 years
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You can't just drop that "I read Forces Multiplied" bomb on us and not give a ten page written reaction.
[cracks knuckles] if u insist
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nicky cant drive hc: destroyed. rip. also i loved how andy and nile stole those sports cars and were being badass and driving off the bridge & meanwhile joe and nicky were just absolutely vibing in the van
'heres the thing about power: people who have it think they deserve it' [shot of police car] i see u greg
5 whole panels being dedicated to booker not being able to unlock his door. booker not even seeing noriko sitting RIGHT THERE in the window at first. incredible
noriko being 24/7 horny was surprising. like wow all of the stuff i saw she did out of context was 100% equally horny in context as it was out of context. love that for her
i didnt think the 'andy + slavery' thing was handled as badly as everyone made it out to be when telling me about it. tho from the way it was talked about i had kind of figured the conflict between andy and nile re: slavery would be really racially charged (esp considering nile is a black american and would obvs have Thoughts on the subject in that regard) but like,, done in a cringey 'a-white-guy-obviously-wrote-it' kind of way? but it wasnt that. i mean. it makes sense that andy would be implicit in slavery through the years
i mean, like she says, is that not what people just did to each other in the aftermath of battles for thousands of years? and i really like how its pointed out that it was what she was raised with (in the beginning when you see her put shackles on that guy after the battle) but she also accepts responsibility for it and acknowledges that it was wrong and not just 'what people did'.
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i like how from her expressions you can kind of tell baby andy knew it was off but she sets those feelings aside bc she felt angry. it explains how she felt but didnt make her out to be blameless in it. plus i mean. i dont know, the fact that andy was involved in a lot of morally shady stuff for 7000 years is not that wild for me. if you live that long youre just Going to be involved in some shit, and she didnt even have other immortals with her as positive community influences, she literally just did whatever the fuck she wanted for thousands of years
'i was worshipped as a god once' i mean, yeah no shit she wouldve been involved in some seriously fucked up stuff, gods were fucking scary back in the day
tldr it could use some polish but it wasnt that bad
tho everything people said about moose being boring was unfortunately a little true. sorry king i tried to be interested in you
joe and nicky writing verbal fanfiction about nile and moose was iconic. 'you seeing that?' 'i am definitely seeing that'
it was also extremely funny bc that was like 60% of their contribution to the whole comic, besides kidnapping copley. they came, they wrote some fanfic, they left. kings. at least in tog1 they had an excuse to be useless bc they got kidnapped
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joe just found out his old friend who he thought was dead is alive (and also probably wants to murder them) and instead of investigating with andy he stopped to help nile up. champ.
nicky shooting noriko through andy was cool. rip to the concept since it wont happen in tog2
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wanna see mr ejiofor deliver this line
on that note imo copley was. weirdly enough, more interesting in fm than in tog1. to me at least. the fact that andy let him live and he was so haunted by what had happened that he came back and sought them out despite knowing they would likely kill him for it bc he wanted to not only make up for what hed done but also to tell them what theyd done for the world was admittedly more interesting than andy just kind of drafting him to the cause and him going 'okie'
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i like how nicky was drawn in this one. in opening fire he looks like a blob man but in fm he looks more like a very nice grampa with a very good dye job
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'theres no pain like a broken heart' andy 🥺
noriko implying andy's never drowned. .. .idk about that one, she musta drowned sometime
joe and nicky came, they waxed poetic about nile's love life, they waxed poetic about grog, and then they left.
sports bras being a reason humanity is good. i mean..... okay, yeah.
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i mean. wild but you cant exactly tell her shes wrong
i liked how noriko telling andy that their purpose is to make people suffer coincides with joe and nicky finding out that they actually did good all those years
joenicky in opening fire: jail for booker jail for booker for 100 years
joenicky when copley tells them he knows where booker is: WE'LL KILL YOU WHERE IS HE
joenicky when copley comes back: if your vibes come off as even remotely rancid we Will destroy you
joenicky 2 minutes later when copley helped them find booker: he made up some ground :)))) <3 lov you j cops
theyre forgiving af
moose: how old are you?? a hundred??? a thousand???
nile [vine voice]: I M 2 7 ?
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alright andy you got me there
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joe texts like my aunt
i dont know why noriko drowning andy in that car tickled me. Bad And Naughty Andromaches Get Put In The Pear Wiggler To Atone For Their Crimes.
the drowning sequence was cool
copley trying to talk to andy while she was like o_o at him was great
ive hit the picture limit but id seen that panel where nicky goes 'forgive me' as he kills a guy out of context and it was HILARIOUSLY anticlimactic for me to discover that there was literally no context to it. nicky just apologizes to random people he kills. i thought that guy was someone he knew or something. nope its just Some Guy that nicky didnt know from adam
nile's complaint that andy was especially brutal to the guys on the boat... i mean. . , how exactly does one kill a man with an axe and not be brutal about it?
it was funny how noriko kissed andy and the only people who seemed surprised by that were nile and also andy
nicky and joe's complete non-reaction to finding out noriko is alive And Evil Now is endlesly funny. they just left her on that boat and neither cared. i get book and nile not caring but joe and nicky knew her, and they just have 0 input on the subject of what to do with her
pinstripe suit guy!
joe and nicky and booker packing up and leaving with nile
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andy blowing up at nile was A Moment tho
i dont know, i get why people didnt like the ending but its. .. . it makes more sense in the comicverse. bc the squad doesnt really. .. interact outside of jobs? i mean, think of the moon landing story in ttt. that was booker and joe and nicky doing a job and andy only showed up a for a couple minutes after it was done. or the brunch in the first issue of opening fire. the squad arent as tight in the comic, and andy often seems to do her own thing outside of work, so andy saying 'i dont want to do work anymore' and the squad being like 'alright bye then' makes more sense in this universe than the movie one
also i feel like greg was Trying to set up a thing where nile becomes the Leader of The Squad after andy dies but like. its not very well done since. . . i mean, nile hasnt spoken to booker since opening fire, (and she only knew him A Day). and shes known joe and nicky all that time, but there isnt really anything that indicates that they have any relationship at all, much less one that's grown. in all the comicverse the only time nile and nicky speak is in FM, and in that scene nicky tells nile about noriko. nile goes from someone who needs to be set aside to have background knowledge explained to her to being the Leader of the group with nothing in between. it kind of... comes out of nowhere.
on the other hand tho... i felt really bad for andy thru the whole thing. well, i always felt bad for andy, but in this one she seemed so miserable, especially since it really felt like none of the others actually.... cared about her. when noriko came back no one asked andy how she was doing (big question ik, but it wouldve showed they cared at least), nobody ever expressed any concern for her, no one even really seemed to want to be around her. in opening fire everyone was more distant than in the movie of course, but there were little moments where she would joke with joe, or nicky would try and comfort her, or stuff like that, but in FM it really felt like they just didnt really care about her. & in opening fire it felt a lot like andy's relationship with nile breathed some new life into her, but in FM it felt like all they did was argue. i get theyre not *as* close in the comics but it really felt like the only person who cared about andy at all was noriko (which was probably also how andy felt) but it just seemed to come out of nowhere. honestly i was reading and i was honestly agreeing with andy that she might just be better off if she did just die. opening fire, on the other hand, never make me feel that way
tho everyone made it sound like when the squad split up it was one of those cursed 'the found family leaves each other at the end of the journey' tropes. but guys i mean,,, this is the second installment out of three. that isnt the End. theyll come back in the third one and Dramatically Reunite to fight some baddies (probably those 'others' noriko mentioned). im guessing yitzhak fits into that too somehow.
anyways it wasnt That Bad but it made me kind of sad and the only Sweet Found Family vibes in it were when they saved booker. also they shouldve beefed up that nilemoose romance, it underwhelmed me. 6.5/10
i also ABSOLUTELY understand all of greg's comments about how you couldnt make FM directly into a movie, he always said that it had no plot and. i get it now. it really didnt have a plot sdfghjkl
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so.... i saw the uncharted movie
i- i mean some things were good? listen ik people are gonna hate me for this since i’ve been seeing nonstop good reviews but like, im kinda sad? the production, effort, and hell some of the casting choices are perfect, but like, i wouldve maybe liked a movie that wasnt a weird amalgamation of the games? like I was pretty excited considering i thought it was a prequel, and then i got in and like, sigh  more ranty bs under the cut (spoilers for the games) (tbh i did like some things, this is just me venting about the stuff i didnt)
its like they wanted to make a new movie based on the games, but then got worried if they didn't include stuff from the games no previous fans would watch it, so then they chopped and screwed the games together on a partially filled canvas and said “here ya go! An Uncharted movie!
like, sam’s “death” was a crazy personal thing in the games, he slips out of his grasp (thats why the whole sam catching nate over the ledge was so important because its mirrored) and nate was right there. i dont remember if it was touched on in the games but i wouldnt be surprised if nate blamed himself for sam’s “death”, and then even more when he found out he was alive and he never went back.
BUT in the movie, it’s a thing that happens off-screen, with no connection to nate at all. there’s no actual meaning there, it’s just “oh shit he’s dead? at least i have someone to blame” which is INFURIATING because it was such a personal scene! shit hits hard man! also, because they had nate and victor having just met, instead of having known each other since nate was a teen, they have NO relationship, which makes their dynamic kinda weird since throughout the entirety of the games (flashbacks not included) they already had an established relationship
also WHY did they make a new, watered down nadine INSTEAD OF JUST USING NADINE? you’re already fucking with canon, at least give me a character i’ll care about.  also. the puzzles. wheres my favorite convoluted bullshit thats in the games. this was like baby’s first uncharted, all they did was find a book, then a church, turn some keys, find a place on a map, and boom you’re in. in the games you go to like 50 different locations, each in a crazier spot than the last, then you do some wild ass puzzles that make no sense and make you wanna tear your brain out (dont even get me started on the shadow puzzle, i hate that thing) plus theres symbols EVERYWHERE, and each means something so dont forget ANYTHING, thank god for the journal speaking of the journal WHERE THE FUCK WAS IT? NATE DIDNT WRITE OR DRAW OR FUCKING DO ANYTHING ONCE YOU HEATHENS, ITS A KEY PART OF THE GAMES, ITS LITERALLY HOW YOU DO HALF THE SHIT, NOT ONE SCENE OF HIM PULLING IT OUT? NOT ONE SKETCH? HOW DARE YOU (and if anyone mentions the journal they pull out in the movie, it’s not even nate’s) this ones more jokey, but why did you do my man sully wrong and a) make him not gray, it looks good on him, he aint the same, and b) WHERES HIS MOUSTACHE YOU HEATHENS, you only gave it to him in the aftercredits last thing (for now) elena? please tell me if you’re making a sequel you’ll bring in elena. if you rewrote everything just to have him not find the love of his life and WIFE im gonna cry, how dare you also the ages are iffy, not a huge deal but still noticed it, kid nate seemed to be somewhere in the range of 13 to 16, but sam was still a part of the orphanage. however, canonically, sam is out of the orphanage when nate is 12.   
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shattersstar · 3 years
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mac pls rant to me about alucard like literally talk about anything relating to him idc he just lives in my mind rent free already and I want to hear ur thots 🥺🥺 and u know how much I love ur writing like only u can make me simp over a character i've never heard about until after reading ur series
in this house we all simp over alucard 😌 but tyy i always have so many thoughts omg like i woke up after four hrs of sleep and this fucking show was the first thing on my mind snksndsk anyway imma talk abt the series bc i feel like it sorta came outta nowhere and i dont wanna bore the masses with my thoughts on character design or like animation style (not yet at least hehehe)
okay first of all the fact sm of u guys r reading this without knowing anything about him or the show or anything is so sweet like y’all really sticking through it for me..i appreciate it endlessly. this ranting might also be kinda helpful and idk i like hearing writers thoughts behind their work so i hope y’all do to
the title comes from farouq jwaydeh i found it on that twitter thread about arabic love poems that went around a few months ago. i actually wasn’t planning on naming the series that but the doc where i was working on each part had the quote “and if the devil was to ever see you, he’d kiss your eyes and repent” in it because i was planning on writing smth for alucard based of that and the more i thought about it, the more i realized how well it worked for the series. its so romantic and so devoted which is the type of relationship i do be writing and it also works within a lot of the religious themes of the show. if i could write that well it lowkey sounds like smth alucard would say akhfsk
and speaking of alucard, ik the fact he has two names might be a bit confusing especially with how i formatted bluebelle (whoops) but the characters name is adrian tepes but he goes by alucard for Reasons i wont spoiler lmao. aches & arches does do a decent job explaining y i choose to call him adrian instead, but in the future if i do write stuff outside this series for him there is definitely a chance he’d be called alucard it just really depends on context. i just think there is something very personal and intimate that the reader is very serious about the fact he isn’t a figure for the masses or only tied to his father. hes his own person who they love and they deserve to be called a name that is their own not a moniker given to them y’know? also the fact i dont think anyone actually calls him adrian in the show makes me sad like noo baby ur so much more than what ur father and Humanity has made u out to be ahaha
idk if i have mentioned this anywhere yet but this is also the first series ive ever written in like my....4? 5? years writing on tumblr (ew i dont wanna think about how long ive been doing this) but thats kind of a big deal. i’m a bit :/ with myself for how much stuff i tried to add to bluebelle because i really didnt think i was gonna write anything else for him so it feels a bit cramped in terms of themes in comparison to the other parts. i feel like it does stick out a little within the series considering some of those themes havent been explored again but ehh i’m complaining about something i can change so whelp. guess it means i gotta write more
although i must admit i’m probably not gonna write a wedding and i’m sorry if u guys wanted one i just...can’t Bring myself to write a christian wedding even tho i’m pretty sure alucard is atheist? or at least not catholic lmao and i would rather write a hindu wedding bc its better (noah fence) and i think the ideas? or meanings around hindu wedding ceremonies make sense for this but i dont wanna be alienating so.yeah. that also feels like i gotta start writing a plot and i would rather Not do that i’m fine with mindlessly fluff for now. idk if anyone can tell but i’m avoiding the whole vampire and human relationship convo bc i havent figured out my thoughts on it and i dont wanna deal. let adrian live in a soft fantasy world with no bad things okay thanks thats all .
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yyxgin · 3 years
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i think the only person ive ever wanted to steal from was some lady on tiktok who ordered rare pc’s and showed tiktok and then just resold them at the same or more value. she showed a jungkook pc from a japanese release if i remember correctly and it cost her $400 and when she resold it she made profit?? like HELLO??? apparently that was what the pc collectors would call ‘a steal’ in regards to how much she paid for it.
oooh i just googled pepco apparently they own some big-ish stores here. it sounds p straight forward!! plenty of training videos i imagine 🥲 friends at work are always a good idea but apparently i have what my mother calls a ‘fuck off face’ and... she’s not wrong. not at all. it morphs into disgust easily when i garner unwanted attention. but it’s not intentional anymore i practiced for when i used to walk to school bc i hated people and the randos bc they’re so creepy when i’m clearly in uniform and underage ewwwww blergh 😫
i initially started writing how i do bc i used to love how fancy my nan’s writing looked so when she passed away and i was old enough to understand how to write in cursive i just did that. my r’s and i’s are dangerously similar but no one complains so :D
libra ☀️, leo 🌝, virgo ⬆️ !! i’m easily the flirtiest person ik and i don’t even do it on purpose it’s dangerous but there’s a boy who matches my flirt w flirt and it’s an ongoing joke so 😳😫😫 idm making decisions if it’s like,, just for me but when there’s more than one person involved i don’t like to step on toes or come off as if i haven’t considered others thoughts and feelings bc i had a day out w a girl and she said to me sumn about wanting to do something and said ‘so like 7pm, yeah?’ and i freaked out bc i was not comfortable getting the train home later than 5pm and she was just dragging me everywhere and i distinctly remember thinking never letting myself get in a situation like that again. she even brushed off my subtle comment about seeing a bookshop that looked old and that our other mutual friend would enjoy by saying ‘god no. you wouldn’t catch me dead in there.’ i died inside. i just wanted to look at books bruh 💔💔
shotaro is v cute!! gives me stray kids vibes tbh. all of stray kids are so precious to me. esp felix!! he’s just so 🥺🥺 HE MADE COOKIES!! FOR OTHER IDOLS!!!
don’t worry bestie! 🤩 we all have days like that. tbh i was v tired yesterday myself. my sleep is so restless nowadays too 🙃 and uh i’ve been doing training courses all day. it said 60 mins per course and they weren’t lying!! the other ones i’ve done before ive been able to push out in a couple of hours max but maybe bc i have actual time to dedicate to my job i have to do more courses since i’ll be there more often. anyway.
do you have plants? 🤔 ~🌻
A PC FOR  $400 ???? PEOPLE ARE INSANE THESE DAYS WHAT THE FUCK ITS LITERALLY JUST A PIECE OF PAPER W A MAN ON IT 😭😭😭 
pepco is awesome tho,, they have so much cheap useless stuff there i always leave all my money there </3 my boss said i’ll have a discount since i work there but i forgot how much it was ?? i think she said 11% or something ?? i honestly kind of zoned out during that part. i dont think i’m getting like training videos ?? we don’t quite do that here, they just show you around and tell you how stuff works around there and that’s it ?? i hope i do good i’m kind of stressed :DDD also people tell me i look really egoistic and like a bitch at first so i guess im just gonna smile nonstop or something so i make some new friends uhhh
your big three... im not really fluent in astrology lmao but libra sun leo moon sounds like a very sexc combo imo,, i am aries sun libra moon cancer rising (i think i said libra rising earlier ?? my mistake oopsies) so feel free to read me or something if you’re into that bc i just pretend i know shit about astrology all the time even tho i know nothing :(
also that friend you mentioned sounds like a real bitch,,,why didnt she let you look at old books :( meanie !! 
YES FELIX MADE COOKIES FOR OTHER IDOLS !! SWEETHEART !! I ALSO REMEMBER THAT HE SAID HE GAVE SOME TO CHENLE TELLING HIM TO SHARE W HIS MEMBERS BUT HE JUST ATE THEM BY HIMSELF LMAOOOOO 
i hope your training videos are over soon omg that sounds like such a pain in the ass. also i hope you get to sleep better soon :(( 
YES I DO i have uhhh 13 plants atm and the list is still growing. they are all alive and well and ive had them for like 2 years now so thats a record for me even tho i think one of my plants is currenlty dying and im really sad abt it i dont know how to fix it :( 
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zhuhongs · 3 years
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When I was growing up I didnt understand why people shared food with others. I shared food with my mom and such, but that was it. I thought that sharing food was something people only did with those super close to them. I never once just considered sharing food with others like many families do.
I grew up as one of the only poor colored kids in a well off white neighborhood. My mom always had this weird complex. That she and the rest of our family "weren't like other Hispanic people" because we "didn't take handouts" and "didn't live like that" whatever that was supposed to mean.  I hate her internalized racism sm... it fucked me up so bad but i’m mostly over it and she is too thank god but that's a whole other issue for another text post) Thus she always ingrained it in me that I don't take food that other ppl are offering me. If a white person tries to give me food, they're probably just pitying me for being the poor girl. And if a poc gives me food, they need it more than I do, I should take it but pay them back later for it. To save face and not cause burden. I never thought twice abt it and it was rarely an issue. Most of my friends were white and their parents always thought it was kind that i offered to pay for my food but never let me. And my friends of color... well i didnt have many. I didnt have many friends growing up that I rlly remember. I was always just weird and quiet. I occasionally brought food on birthdays and got food for others on their birthday. But outside of special occasion I didnt go out of my way to give people food. If I didnt like something I'd give it to someone who did. And if someone was gonna throw something away, I ate it. I never let food go to waste. When I went out with people, I bought my food and they bought theres and we just ate. Nothing else. I never thought anything of it.
I remember a very distinct moment where I started to feel differently. I was in my second semester of university and my dance team was preparing for a performance over spring break. We had been practicing from 9am to 3pm and then decided to go to the mall to get food and just hang out for a bit. My university friend group is like.. notoriously bad at making decisions so I usually make the decisions for them bc theyre all so passive alkfjaslkfjd (THEY ALL HAVE OLDEST IMMIGRANT DAUGHTER OF COLOR SYNDROME like me too omg ik ur a ppl pleser but PICK SMTH, ily them... i’ll stop now) . SO we were deciding where to get food and settled on the food court and we all get what we want. So we did all that and sat a big table together and I just remember everyone putting the food in the middle and getting extra plates so we could take from each we wanted and have a little bit of everything. And at first i was like?? HUH!?? like I got what i wanted bc thats what I wanted and then planned to take my leftovers home to eat at work later that night. And that ended up working out, they could kinda tell that was my intention but ever since then I noticed that that friend group always does that. We all buy different things and share. I really used to find it dumb at first bc its my money and i paid for what i wanted. I didn’t want to take others food and I didn’t rlly want to give them mine. I thought that mentality was universal. I was always kinda on the outside with that group, we never fully meshed but I really wanted to make the effort to be friends with them because I knew it would be rewarding, even if we were just casual friends. And yea idk, just through them I began to kinda unlearn the way I used to feel about sharing food. It’s not about the money, it’s about the connection to others and about giving freely and letting others give to u. But money was always tight as a id. As I’ve started working and making money, thankfully i’ve abandoned this knee jerk reaction.
I read a chapter of a book for highschool english once called “Sharing Food as an Act of Communion” or smth along those lines and I got the concept but didn’t rlly think it was that deep. But in that moment, i started to understand it a lot more. Sharing food and sharing things in general isn’t about the object itself, its about what got u to that point to share something with someone. Due in part to way i was raised as I elaborated on earlier, I really wasn’t a loving or giving person. I was selfish. I was taught to be selfish. Because my parents had that mentality and passed it onto their kids. That was the cutthroat immigrant way of theirs. They were very much “pull yourself up by your bootstraps ppl.” My brother is still like that a bit. It’s very sad sometimes, I’m trying to get him out of it. Baby steps. My mom doesn’t understand why he’s so selfish. One of these days I think i’m going to sit her down and tell her that it’s her own doing. That how she raised us. But I know she doesn’t want to hear it, so for her sake and mine I just agree with her and let the issue pass without incident. I truly believe that kindness and community are the most radical things that humans have. I rlly do. It took me a long time to get there. I used to be so convinced I was better of alone. One man for themselves. I blame my father, i really do.
One time when things were really going to shit with my family, my dad came in my room and asked me how I could be so cruel to him when he was my father, completely unaware of the fact that I had been abused by him my entire life. He just didn’t register it that way bc it wasn’t physical. He said to me “You know Sage, I would expect this from your brother. But you’re a girl . I thought you’d be nicer, more loving and giving.” but it was his own actions that shaped this. And it wasn’t until I had stopped living with him at 18 that I was able to become more like how I am now.
Really, in the past I wasn’t a very nice or loving person. I wasn’t mean either!! I was just passive. A cold lake near a forest. I was nice looking on any surface level, but there was nothing warm or pleasant. A cold lake with jagged rocks underneath. With the help of others i’ve warmed, the rocks eroded down to something you would keep in a collection. I prefer it this way. I’ve healed a bit. I understand now what ppl mean when they say food is a love language. It isn’t one for me yet, but I recognize why it is for others. I get it now.
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cassyapper · 3 years
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anyway my like last/second to last reblog made me think about this so caesar crusader au woot woot also it got kinda long so here’s a cut for those who dont wanna scroll through all that <3 also i didnt proofread so sorry i just dont care enough </3
first things first let me get the set up;; caesar joseph nd suzi all live in the same house u can interpret it as ot3 or just caejose and suzi is there to vibe w them and help joseph convince caesar to get into trouble, it’s however u want it
then either cause ot3 or suzi agrees 2 be a surrogate, holly is born, joseph’s still the dad like genetically but she’s raised by all three of em essentially and still ends up just as bubbly as she is in canon, except there is no absolute fuckign way she doesnt know hamon because caesar would never, and i mean NEVER, let his kid grow up w/o such a useful trick up her sleeve
then holly gets married, joseph embarrasses both suzi and caesar by how hostile he is towards sadao, caesar is more likely to cuff him over the head bc of it, so there’s that. doesnt change much ig but makes joseph thinks a LITTLE bit more before lashing out JKF;JFJ;S
jotaro comes along and he is caesar’s BOY ok. caesar just gets him. his quiet and calm demeanor (ik caesar isnt necessarily like that in general but around kids he is and as he gets older he’d give off that vibe more as he mellows out) made jotaro feel rlly relaxed around him and as a result he’s v open to him. joseph and suzi ofc have a relationship w jotaro as well but it isnt hard to see there is a bit of favorites playing, especially once jotaro grows up and really starts closing off to most ppl
caesar tries to encourage him to open up more to his family again, but this just ends up with him getting cut off as well. it’s sad ):
in the meantime tho joseph meets avdol and develops his stand. with avdol and caesar combined, they can kinda wrangle joseph into being productive w his energy, but theyre not full-proof. nothing will ever be full-proof against joseph
caesar nd avdol would get along rlly well me thinks. caesar would teach him sum italian and avdol would teach him so arabic. caesar wouldnt have a stand, but since stands r kiiiiinda described as just more intense versions of hamon, caesar can see like outlines of stands if he’s looking at them through one of his hamon bubbles. he only figures this out w avdol’s help. theyre buds
then they find out abt dio thanks to joseph’s stand and they all kinda. get srs. it’s time to search and all that for this fucker. caesar’s pissed cause his grandfather died for no reason now then, same w joseph. avdol helps them navigate the stand world as they search
honestly all is relatively well mostly but then. sdc begins
caesar hasnt heard from jotaro himself for like two years when holly calls them in a panic over him being in jail. og just caesar and joseph were gonna go, but then avdol brings up jotaro mightve developed his stand, since stands r kinda genetic, so they bring avdol along too cause he’s the expert here
they get there, jotaro calls his mom a bitch and is otherwise disrespectful and moody as fuck, and caesar is frankly just disappointed more than angry/frustrated, th opposite of joseph. this makes jotaro feel worse tho KJFN;;N
avdol gets him out tho, they head out. caesar scolds jotaro for snapping at holly and joseph when the only things they ever did were show care for him, and jotaro snaps at HIM in return. fuckin teenagers. caesar changes tactics then and tells jotaro about how he used to be a street thug and all that, and how he cut himself off from his family in an effort to keep them safe (as did his dad mario zeppeli and joseph’s mom djkndje;dn why do bad coping skills run in the family), but it didnt work and instead it just put them in more danger and unjustified/meaningless emotional turmoil. jotaro gets thoughtful over this
then jotaro heads to school and accepts his kiss from holly w/o much fight, just wordless grumbling. it’s a start, caesar guesses
then jotaro comes home with a fucking bloody body only an hour later BHILDFHUDHUJN;
avdol talks abt the fleshbud, caesar is concerned cause jesus h christ, that is a child, kakyoin was only 16-almost-17 when he got fleshbudded, it’s been months, holy shit ??? jotaro must have the same thoughts cause he goes to pull the fleshbud out to everyone’s panic
they decide to let jotaro do it tho and jotaro does, just like in canon. kakyoin’s still rlly rattled but w caesar nd holly both telling him it’s ok and jotaro’s weird ass “why did i save you? who knows.........” thing, he calms down
then holly gets stand sickness and everyone freaks out, even jotaro! kinda. he reacts much the same he did in canon except maybe a lil more frantic cause he had literally JUST decided to clean up his act and now his mom is dying. he wants to show her he knows better now. it’s rough.
caesar considers staying just to watch over his daughter esp cause he doesnt have a stand so it’s like, what would he even do, but then jotaro and kakyoin say theyre going and caesar is like “ok no. ur children.” “that’s my mom. im going either by myself or youll let me go with you.” “christ”
so caesar tags along just to keep an eye of these crazy kids and yeah
this is ending up as a whole fucking fic draft or some shit so im gonna stop here but if anyone is curious on my thoughts on how caesar would continue to affect things from here, lemme know nd ill elaborate. im PRETTY SURE...caesar being around would lead to avdol and kakyoin living cause hamon’s healing abilities, nd since he doesnt have a stand he kinda just ends up as team medic SOOOO....
anyway thanks for reading all thsi if u did JKD;JN;
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