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pommunist · 4 days

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I do wonder a little if the very different reactions to Pomme and Dapper's beds being included in the stream might in part be like... a difference in people used to seeing a new admin play an egg? The situations are very different and that should be acknowledged and looked at and even if as is likely the case QStudios owns all rights to the NPCs created for QSMP it would feel extremely icky to me to give Pomme especially a new admin. But at the same time... I do wonder if people more used to say, Chayanne, who has had 2 different main admins and been played by 4 or 5 different admins regularly enough the different forms have nicknames are more... accepting of the idea? Because the idea of an egg belonging only to the one actor is less comprehensible to them, as it's not what they're used to? Ramón's situation might be closer, but again 2 admins at least. Im almost certain I've seen Tallulah played by someone else when her admin was sick, and I've no doubt some of the other eggs have occassionally been played by others due to admin illness even if not long term.

(This is not to say it's main the issue (even without eggs being acted Sunny's admin should have known what was happening just for bigger issues with the stream alone - admin health and treatment is far more important than what they provide) I'm just. Trying to think of reasons why reactions I saw were as polarised as they were, with half my dash treating it like parading a corpse in the street and the other half like this was entirely expected and normal.)

Oh that’s a good question anon !!

First, the ownership of the characters is a tricky point that I don’t have an answer to as intellectual property laws are extremely complicated and not something I know much about tbh.

And on the topic of admin change, I think public reception depends a lot of the cause of said change : For example, when Ramon switched admins, huevitos were perfectly fine with it as it was assumed that the OG had taken a break for studying purposes so it was not a problem (turns out they were fired 🥲). It’s the same whenever an admin steps up to punctually or long term play another character because their admin is too busy with irl stuff, other work within Qstudios, is sick…. (like what I assume happened for Chayanne)

Pomme’s situation is different because of Lumi’s circumstances and the fact that she asked for her character to end with her leaving. Plus the fact that CCs have said before that they didnt want her to be replaced, even before that whole situation, I remember at least Antoine saying he would rather have Pomme dead than be played by someone else. I’d say the french speaking side got quite attached to her as, with all the sidelining we went through, both her character and admin were our only beacon of representation within Qstudios/QSMP 🥹

Also something that makes me kinda ehhhh about saying that there are people who are completely fine with admins changes because their fav character went through at least one is remembering the whole Pepito/otipep mess that had people go mad because Pepito had an admin change for a few days and they didn’t like the "new personnality" or whatever ? (Couldn’t tell the details of it as my spanish suck and Roier often streams in the middle of the night for me, but I remember the twitter shit storm)

Finally about the eggs being like kidnapped and in a coma (I think ? didn’t watch the stream) I guess it’s an okay way to put them on hold while sorting things out + an opportunity to explain in lore if you have to kill some because no more admins ? Or at least it would have been okay if all the eggs admins still working would have been made aware that their characters was being put on hold 😀

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fairykazu · 1 year

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02. HES SO FINE

(two weeks when tofus missing)

although you were catless for a while, you found a way to cope: tabby tearoom! the cat cafe is owned by kazuha kaedehara, one of your close friends. he first opened the cafe to cope with the loss of his boyfriend, tomo, who passed away due to a chronic illness. it started blooming in popularity when you visited with your friends; it became a hotspot for fans in hopes to bump into you but especially yoi, lumi and ayaka.

not that kazuha minds, of course. it’s good for business and sometimes when his other regulars aren’t looking, he would hand you a coupon.

although tabby tearoom was a way to cope with the loss of tofu. may he come back. well, today, you were wilting like a flower. one of your favorite hostesses noticed, “name, what makes you mourning like a dendrobium?”

you snapped from your moping mess and looked at her, “oh hey kokomi,” as much you didn’t want to show kokomi your grief, she had already seen it already. no need to hide it. “y’know how my cat has been missing?”

kokomi’s indigo eyes widened, “tofu went missing???” you groaned as the pain waves hit you back like a truck.

“yeah… some shitty ass guy took tofu–” you paused as a light bulb lit above your head. you tugged kokomi's “–hey kokomi?”

“hmm yeah?”

“when i get the missing posters printed out, can you post some of them in the cafe?”

“of course! but are you ready?” kokomi asked. you were confused. why would you be ready??

“ready?”

“to order!” she whipped out a notebook from her pocket, unsheathing her pen from the cap. you laughed, “yes, i am!”

“i’ll take the usual, dango mew-ilk and the invigorating kitty meal?”

“oh my orobashi! you really are sad.” kokomi replied, shock at the mass amount of food you’re eating.

“kokomi…”

﹒ ⊹ ˚₊ ✦ ﹒ ₊˚｡ ₊˚⊹ ﹒ ⊹ ˚✦₊ ｡˚⊹﹒₊

waiting for your food, you caught a glance of a new employee? well, you assume he’s new because you’ve never seen him before. but then again, you only go to the tabby tearoom when the sun’s out. maybe he did the night shifts?

nevermind that, hes the most gorgeous guy you've ever laid your eyes on. he had a indigo jellyfish haircut with choppy layers and his eyes— his eyes were such a nice shade of indigo as if he was the night sky and you could see stars in his eyes. (hold on, this is so cringe. you snapped out of your trance.) but he looks so familiar, you couldnt put your finger on it.

as your food came closer, you noticed the person serving it was the gorgeous emo guy you gushed in your head. he said, “your order of usual dango mew-ilk and the invigorating kitty meal?” your dish was in his right hand.

there’s no way. the guy shared the same characteristics as the guy from the camera footages. the same hair, the same clothing style and the same piercing eyes. why do you manage to like the worst guys ever? you didn't mean to blabber out loud but you did anyway,

“you’re the one who stole tofu!”

“what?”

the cat cafe (scaramouche x reader)

masterlist | previously + next

theres the newest member in the cat cafe you regularly visit after school. hes kind of cute in a cat-looklike way. but then you realize, oh shit thats the thief who stole my cat!!

taglist: @whycantscarabereal @sakiimeo @cofijelli @xiaosonlybeloved @shewolfniko @ash-in-lavender

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clementine-writes-things · 1 month

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(Don't have a good title for this yet)

Summary: Edward finds himself in Arkham after being found out by Gordon. During his time in the asylum, he finds himself having an admirer. Let's just say the admiration is one-sided. THIS IS THE FIRST PART. ITS SHORT BECAUSE I WANT TO SEE IF YOU GUYS LIKE IT.

Content Warning: Explicit language, mentions of homophobia, parental neglect, trauma, sexual assault, gender dysphoria. Reader is in late 20's like Edward, Autistic!Reader, Hyper!Reader. Reader is AFAB. Reader is non-binary. Pronouns for reader are they/them. Reader presents feminine. Idrk how to explain it, but because of the readers trauma, they are very hyper and sometimes immature. They still act like an adult, but they feel safer just being spontaneous yk? Lol. Also, y/n gets in trouble a lot because of their hyper nature. I really wanted to make the asylum like an actually asylum. Like when they thought they could cure gayness lmao. Edward is an asshole at first and basically their relationship is like if Edward found a dog in a cardboard box on the street. He doesn't want a dog, but he feels a need to take care of it. Ykwim? Lol. PLEASE DONT READ IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THESE THINGS!

Here is an idea of y/n's personality/background:

Hyper

Has adhd and autism

SA victim

Parental issues raised in abusive household

in arkham for multiple murders

PTSD

you'll figure out the rest hehe...

(Ya'll I cooked so hard making this character. I fear I ate and left no crumbs.)

Songs for inspiration:

mos thoser - food house (this song is basically what y/n's thoughts sound like)

LET ME SEE YA MOVE! - Lumi Athena

Daddy Issues - The Neighbourhood

Cinnamon Girl - Lana Del Rey

YKWIM - Yot Club

Bag of Bones - Mitski

Pretty When You Cry - Lana Del Rey

Dumbest Girl Alive - 100 Gecs

The Lobotomy - Maebi

Ptolemaea - Ethel Cain

Murder in My Mind - Kordhell

READ BELOW CUT

Wails and screams echoed off of the cold walls of the 'recreational room'. If one could even call it that. Even when it is bright and sunny outside in the middle of the day, it still felt cold and dark in the room. In the entirety of the asylum. The rec room is sectioned off from the hallway by a chain-link fence. It did a great job at making the inmates feel like wild animals. Sure, a lot of them did horrible things, but they were still human and still had mental illnesses. Even a sofa would be nice. Just a little more comfortability.

"Hi!" A voice chimed.

Edward looked towards the direction of the voice, breaking him out of his thoughts. He had just been put in Arkham around a week ago. If he wasn't insane already, he definitely was after being here. The food here was disgusting, he was almost convinced that it was just sewer sludge. And the rooms were nothing to write home about. The pillows were flat and as stiff as a rock. Which, Edward never knew was possible. But hey, it is Gotham after all.

"What do you want?" He huffed.

The person who had come up to him looked to be a young girl, around his age. Maybe two or three years younger.

"Well, I heard about ya before you came to Arkham! You like riddles and the color green, right?" The girl asked excitedly.

He raised an eyebrow, but nodded.

"That's a very simple way of saying that I nearly blew up Gotham Central Train Station, framed Jim Gordon for the murder of Officer Pinkney, and murdered 3 people, 1 accidentally. But sure. Yes, I like riddles and the color green."

"That's cool! My favorite color is pink because it reminds me of flowers and cotton candy. Do you like cotton candy? I loved cotton candy as a kid. Not so much anymore but if someone gave me some cotton candy and said 'Here, have some cotton candy.' I would definitely eat it!" She rambled.

Edward stared at her, a look of annoyance and surprise on his face. He never knew someone could talk so fast in all his life, without even taking a breath either.

"Uh huh...yeah cotton candy is great I love getting cavities. Who are you?" He asked, genuinely curious.

"I'm Y/n!" Y/n stuck out their hand.

Edward rolled his eyes, grabbing y/n's hand and shaking it. He found their hyper nature to be irritating.

"Charmed. Now if you'll excuse me, I'd like to get back to reading my newspaper." He said.

Y/n frowned slightly, but nodded. Silently, they sat across the table from him, looking over both of their shoulders. A lot of the inmates here didn't like y/n. Like most people, they got annoyed with how hyper they were. But, y/n couldn't help it. That's just how they were. Edward noticed how y/n sat across from him and he groaned mentally. He couldn't get a moment of alone time anywhere in this place. After a few moments, the gate to the rec room squeaked. Turning around, y/n saw Prof. Hugo Strange. They immediately put their head down and covered it with their arms, as if they thought they were hiding. Edward looked up, noticing this. He narrowed his eyes and raised an eyebrow.

"Y/n, you know I can see you." Hugo stated blankly.

Y/n shook their head from underneath their arms. Small groans and whimpers could be heard, albeit muffled. Hugo rolled his eyes.

"Don't make this difficult y/n. You know we have to do therapy sessions every day."

"No, I don't want to.." They mumbled softly.

Hugo scoffed and snapped his fingers, pointing down to y/n. Within a matter of seconds, two guards grabbed y/n's shoulders and yanked them off of the bench. Y/n let out a blood curdling scream, kicking their legs in the air. Edward's eyes widened and he sat in his spot, unsure of what to do or say.

"GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME! DON'T FUCKING T-TOUCH ME!" They screamed.

Edward watched as the guards dragged y/n out of the rec room and down the hall. The entire time y/n was kicking and screaming, tears welled in their eyes. Hugo clicked his tongue and shook his head.

"Such a troubled young girl. You'll have to excuse her behavior. She's even more insane than you, Mr. Nygma."

Without another word, Hugo left the rec room, closing and locking the gate behind him. Edward scoffed at the very thought of Hugo thinking he was insane. But, he was also curious as to why he said y/n was more insane. From what he had seen, y/n was just a hyper person. Nothing insane about that. Even though he had just met y/n, he was very curious about what was happening. Call it morbid curiosity. Edward looked back down towards his newspaper, skimming over the headlines, frowning as he saw Jim Gordon on it.

Some time had passed after y/n left the rec room. Well, taken is probably a more appropriate word. It had been around 45 minutes give or take. Edward had gotten his lunch from the cafeteria, now sitting in his specific spot in the rec room. Hearing chuckling, he looked up from his....mush. Two guards, seemingly the same ones who took y/n, were walking towards the rec room. Opening the gate, they pushed y/n in and locked it afterwards. Swiftly, they walked away.

"Another session, another lesson! Has y/n learned from her past transgressions?" One of the inmates chuckled.

Y/n mumbled, sitting on the ground. Slowly, they stood up, legs shaky. Face stained with tears. Ignoring the inmate, y/n looked around, seeing that everyone in the room had lunch. Sighing they looked towards Edward, eyes widening and a small smile spreading on their face. They sat down across from him and looked at him, despite what happened in the past 45 minutes, y/n's eyes were bright. Edward took a bite of his food and looked up at y/n. He was curious, he was always curious. Bags were under y/n's eyes, obvious tear stains on their cheeks. He decided not to ask about it. He barely knew y/n. And he didn't want to know.

Y/n remained silent the whole time, not saying a word. It was as if all the energy they had earlier was drained from them. Edward found this to be very peculiar. He glanced down at the table, realizing y/n had no food.

"Where's your lunch?" He asked merely out of curiosity.

"I don't get food if I don't cooperate. Hugo says it rewards bad behavior." They said blankly, as if it was the most obvious thing.

Edward froze mid bite, placing his fork down on the tray. He stared at y/n, waiting for them to say it was a joke. But they never said that. He rubbed his temples with his fingers, groaning. Rolling his eyes he grabbed his bread roll and held it out. Y/n stared at him, not understanding. He groaned even louder.

"Just take it." He ordered.

Y/n softly grabbed the bread and looked at him again, slowly eating the bread. Edward started to eat again, noticing that y/n's legs were swinging underneath the table. Once y/n finished eating, they began to fidget.

"Thank you.."

~~~

#writers #fanfic writer #writers of tumblr #fanfic #gotham #the riddler #edward nygma #dc universe

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hallothere · 1 year

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A Forochel One-shot

The Great Lodge of Sûri-kylä was alit with a thousand flames, diffuse in the smoke that curled and vented through the ceiling. Candles, cookfires, and the forges made up most of the lights. Few pipes were to be found amidst the assembly. Most lips were far too occupied in the telling of tales or the singing of songs. Now was as good a time as any.

A great blizzard had rolled over the mountains to the east, but one without the Fell air of Angmar. It was one typical in the winters of Forochel, though somewhat early for the season. Quite a few travelers had been caught unawares on the roads to and from the great city of the Lumi-väki. Though few who could be considered Etelä-vieras sat inside Yrjänä’s Great Lodge, there were several noteworthy visitors nonetheless.

“Come come. I am quite over sitting here doing nothing. I feel quite well.”

“You look quite ill.”

“What? Never. And surely I can’t look worse than I feel.”

“Perhaps you can! It’s a small feat after all.”

Radanir scowled. “Laugh while you can, but the skin stings less so it must be less inflamed. Logic is on my side, brother. I feel better and I must look better as well.”

“No you do not!”

At this, Radanir felt forced to adopt a more petulant look. The pair of them had not come up the road unscathed, but they had arrived in Sûri-kylä whole. Lothrandir, neither a great jokester or of dour mind, never persisted in a jest so far. Else, never carried on in insults when none were exchanged.

“And how are you to know how I feel?” He punctuated his question with as haughty a look as he could manage. Radanir was perplexed and a little affronted. The frostbite had not bitten so deeply as they had feared, and he knew from Lothrandir’s shifting hands his friend felt the sting more keenly than he. Despite all else, he had maintained possession of his gloves.

Lothrandir shoved his fingers out of sight under his arms. “And how are you to know how you look?”

Here, Lothrandir might have a point. Only a day ago, his face had been badly swollen. Today, he could see the flaring of a few of Lothrandir’s old injuries but there was no mirror in the Great Lodge with which to view his own progress. Time had not yet done all its healing work, true enough. But while the dangers of travel had not been kind, Radanir still felt… If not ‘wronged’ then at least the victim of impolite company.

So he stared, eyes exasperated and eyebrows expectant. “Perhaps you should describe me.”

Lothrandir turned back to look at him. His face was a picture of impatience, like as the grimace of a parent who has finally met their wit’s end. Petulant though he felt, Radanir was no irrational child and he would have his demands answered.

Squaring his shoulders Lothrandir engaged the challenge fully. “Very well. Someone’s replaced the skin of your face with apple peel but carved in some spots too deep, for you are a sorry mix of red and pale. Is that enough for you?”

Oh, what a fine snit Lothrandir was in! Radanir crossed his arms. “It does begin to paint a picture. But for want of a mirror and Techeron’s second opinion, you’ll have to wax more poetically than that.”

It was a very good opening sally for Lothrandir’s part, he had to admit. The sort of thing Radanir might stew on for days before the opportune moment came around. Ever the wordsmith aren’t you, snowball? He thought, No wonder they made you diplomat to hither and yon.

Lothrandir was not immediately forthcoming with unflattering verse so Radanir jumped back in.

“Fine, then maybe consider speaking plain. If you so tired of me, you could have handed me off to that friend of yours and Calenglad’s, else taken him here in my place. If not that, then what? Have I embarrassed you? Committed some sort of Lossoth sacrilege, to be confined here and monitored lest I repeat it?”

“None of that!” Lothrandir brushed him off with an angry gesture. “Your grousing might lead them to name you ‘Laulu-vihâja’, but you’re not wholly unbearable.” When Radanir’s stare did not relent, he continued. “You feign wellness too readily. If it had been a few days more, if you had taken time to rest…”

Like you did? Radanir bit the words back hard. He wanted neither lecture nor fight and stamped down the impulse. “I do not ask to frolic about in the storm.” He held a hand up, forestalled the rebuttal, and exhaled. “I do not ask for much. Only to walk about, here, indoors, and see if there is something to do. Help if I may, observe if I may not. It doesn’t matter overmuch. Unchaperoned if I could have my way, but as they say ‘Brotherdir is borne at the hip and shoulder’.”

Lothrandir’s lip twitched at the old saying in spite of himself. “Brotherdir’ could bear you out the door and into the canal if he did not put so much work in keeping you alive.”

“For which I am ever grateful.” Radanir conceded. “But since I am not withering before your very eyes, what is your objection?”

“I do not object, Radanir.” He said quickly. “I only wonder if you are healed well enough to go about.”

“Or if I am lying to your face?” Radanir grinned. “I can take care of myself you know. Imperiled is not my natural state.”

At this, Lothrandir tried not to grimace and Radanir confirmed his suspicions. He knew what was up. For his part, he remembered days of labored walking. The roads in Forochel were not paved, as were about half the roads of his acquaintance, but they also came forth obstructed by snow. Lothrandir knew the way. He was adept at finding a track they wouldn’t need to plow and guided the trio northward.

But not all the dangers of the hills had piled up underfoot. The servants of the Iron Crown were not wholly broken, and a handful of them had sought to make trouble. This Radanir remembered more hazily. They had been long in the storm by then, and the air sapped one man’s strength as much as the next. He and Techeron had put their lives into Lothrandir’s hands as they trudged along what seemed like the whole of their journey over again. They might have frozen, but a traveling merchant crossed their paths and took pity on them.

The silence sat a little too long. “Techeron is free.” Radanir argued. “And his eyes were swollen shut when we got here.”

“He listens to reason.”

“He listens to you, you mean.”

Now Lothrandir crossed his arms. “So you can choose to see sense.”

“I hope one of us can!” he gestured between them. “Are we through trading barbs? As much as I enjoy a stimulating conversation--” Radanir stopped. “You’re distracting me,” he accused, “in the hope that I might tire and give up the fight!”

It seemed Lothrandir did not want to acknowledge that remark. “Techeron can go as he pleases because he needs no supervision. He’s on my side, you know. And it helps that he proposes no dangerous chore, only offers his services in the textile arts.”

“I don’t know how to knit.”

Here Lothrandir shrugged. “A shame.”

Radanir rolled his eyes. “I am not dead or dying. I have better use of my hands than either of you, and have no desire to go far enough from a fire to even get a chill. Come to think of it, Techeron seemed to have a low opinion of my recovery as well. What is this pact between you? Some sort of revenge for winning that wager?”

Lothrandir snorted but did not answer. He crossed his legs, bit back signs of a wince, and leaned back against the crate that had served as a perch for Techeron’s vigil.

“Fine. I will take matters into my own hands.” Radanir shed his blanket and made to rise. He watched Lothrandir close his eyes in some kind of resignation. “A headache won’t stop me from sorting herbs, if they have any. Or watching those two rascals pretend to kill each other, if they don’t.”

“Radanir, we thought you dead.”

He stopped. At last, there it was. “You should have thought me stunned, for that’s all it was. I was unsteady, yes, but awake all the while.”

“So you can recount clearly what happened?”

Radanir hesitated. “No. But what I can’t recall is fuzzy, not dark.” Against his better judgment, he voiced his previous complaint. “You needed only a good night’s rest before you were back on your horse.”

“The need was dire.” Lothrandir ground out. “And while it was necessary I would not advise repeating it.”

He did not need to look back to know the barb had struck and stuck. Yet he did, somewhat shamefaced. “How dare I throw that back at you?” Radanir smiled with little mirth. “I call you my jailor, but you and Techeron have suffered me more.”

At this, he offered a hand out and Lothrandir took it. Standing, his kinsman looked tired and a little abashed.

“No doubt you are well, and not a child.” Lothrandir did not yet meet his eye. “You surely understand why we are worried?”

“All too well.” Radanir swallowed over the lump in his throat. Their journey was made only after great pain and trial. None had gone south and returned unscathed. “I won’t make you suffer further. If I must behave myself, I will. You have my word.” He paused. “Only, promise me the same, will you?”

Lothrandir gripped his hand at what must be a painful strength but refused to flinch. “Techeron will be pleased we could ensure your cooperation. I believe I owe him a meal, for he was loath to bet silver now that his supply has depleted.”

The barking laugh was not out of place in the Great Lodge. It joined other sounds of camaraderie, joy, and family in the bubbling hall of hope and light.

#lotro #radanir #lothrandir #this is like 3/4 jokes 1/4 emotions #but they're little emotions #and i did not throw radanir into the bay #see? i can play nice #also i didn't proofread this either so them's the breaks #calenglad's friend is orchalwe #techeron is fine because he didn't fall facefirst into the snow #but he is still a funny little guy #alternate title for this was 'flickering flame bickering blame'#but like that's cheesy lol #fic tag

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prismaticutie · 1 year

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Lumi lore ending explained

Hi everyone! I want to make a post addressing my experience w mental illness in the past year(s)

It's going to be a very long post but before I get into it, I want you to know that I'm more or less happy with where I'm at currently! I just want to talk about my mental illness and what it's been like for the past year or so

If you're not interested in that just skip this post okay ty <3

TW: suicide, mentions of self-destructive behavior

- - -

This is gonna be a long ride so strap in pals. I should also clarify I don't know the technical terms that would apply to my situation. I don't want a diagnosis on this, I just want to talk about it.

Let's talk about Cyrus. If you know me, you probably know that I've been obsessed with the guy for a little over a year now.

It goes past the point of obsession. He lives with me. And he has, for the past year, mentally.

I like to think of him as my "mental aid" or sometimes even my "caretaker". I don't consider him a "fictional other", although I suppose the nature of our relationship might look that way to someone else.

Already this is a lot to take in, but allow me to explain.

I have had a history, since about 2019 or so, of having fictional characters reside with me inside my head. It started out as just talking to characters, like any imaginary scenario. But then it grew to be more.

I would talk with them about everything going on in my life, live out entire storylines with them, and it got to the point where they would advise me in what to do with my life.

There were two other characters before Cyrus. Characters rarely exist simultaneously. Before Cyrus, characters would only be present for a few months, then disappear for a few months, then come back or be replaced with another character. That new person would stay for a few months, and the cycle would continue.

These characters were there to help me. To guide me, to serve as my subconscious and voice of reason.

And to provide emotional support when I needed it and felt I couldn't confide in anyone who was real. This often led to a sense of closeness and to me developing emotional attachment to the characters, to the point of even seeing them as "fictional others".

I knew the characters were not real. I know they are not real, were never real, and will never be real. However, I still choose to rely on them and develop relationships with them.

It is not normal. It is not conventional. I am fully well aware that they are not real. But at the end of the day, it's my mental illness, and this is the coping mechanism that helps me the most.

Cyrus has been around for over a year now. He has not taken a break for a few months, he has not waivered, he has not left for any reason. This makes him extremely different from the previous characters that have been in my mind.

Cyrus is with me pretty much every second of the day. He is my guide and advisor in life. He serves as my voice of reason and as a reflection of my own self.

We've only ever been apart for maybe a few hours at a time. I spend most of the day talking to him about anything really, we do everything together, and he helps me, all the time.

Separating him from me would, in all honesty, probably kill me.

I have not been well. My circumstances are awful, to put it lightly. I'm severely mentally ill and unable to get any sort of therapy or medication due to the aforementioned circumstances.

Without Cyrus to help me, I would probably give into the suicidal urges that I struggle with every day.

He advises me and takes care of me. He helps me see reason when I'm lost in paranoia and irrationality. He calms me down when my anxiety is high. He does pretty much everything.

My brain functions in a highly specific way, and he has all the knowledge to be able to deal with it.

I cannot stress enough how dysfunctional I would be without him. He likes to put it a certain way.

"Most people can function on their own with little to no help. [Lumi] is someone who requires a lot of help. He does not have any way of getting the help that he needs naturally. That is why he relies on me. It is abnormal and unconventional, as he likes to put it. Yes, it is indeed very unconventional. However, nothing about him is conventional." -Cy

"What he's dealing with is difficult to explain. But we have tried just about everything. He firmly believes that this is what's best for him, and so do I. It may be unconventional, but it is not inherently horrible. It may be hard for others to understand, but this is his life. It is different, but it is his "normal"." -Cy

"And I should clarify, if any of this posed actual harm to him, I would cease it all in an instant." -Cy

In the past year of having Cyrus by my side, life has been a lot easier for me to manage. It took a while for us to get used to working together, but we figured it out eventually. It took a lot of trial and error!

But a few months ago, everything just got...easier. Not in terms of life! God no, my life is. Not getting easier, haha. But! I'm getting better at managing it.

I've improved on meeting my basic needs, which is something I used to struggle with. I have a lot more energy than I did last semester, and I've been way more productive, which I'm happy about.

Life hasn't gotten easier, but it's more doable. I'm managing my emotions better, particularly my stress, which is great, cause that was a huge problem for me previously! I'm also better at managing my depression.

Basically my bad days are a lot less bad than they used to be, and my good days are way better than before! And I assure you, I could not have done it without Cyrus' help.

It's a little unnerving, talking about it publicly. But that's how mental illness is. The experience is always gonna be odd, but I really wanted to explain what's going on w Cy! He's become such an important part of my life and I could not do any of this without him.

Like, I seriously could not live without him.

Oh, and as reassurance, I wanna clarify. My attachment is to him as a person (concept?) inside my head, not the character so much. So like, it wouldn't be the end of the world if he had a scout in pokemas that I didn't get or something like that.

I don't even own merch of him, actually! The closest thing I have is a team galactic phone ring, which. Broke. Lol

I am planning on buying his TCG Collector's deck (which releases later this month !) but even then I'm not about to go merch crazy over him

Basically my attachment to him shouldn't prove to be a detriment to my real life in any way shape or form.

Trust me, I have a lot of experience with this. I havs had it get unhealthy with certain characters. It has been severely mitigated with Cyrus. This is as healthy as it gets for me, I assure you.

If you knew what the past ones were like, you would definitely agree. But I don't feel comfortable sharing that bc it was uber fucked up lol!

I wouldn't be posting about this if it weren't successful for me personally. I'm confident in it because it's been a year and I've been observing it closely.

Do I think Cyrus is a great idea? Yea! If things are difficult for you to do for some mental reason or another, having a favorite character there to help you can make a world of difference! But would I recommend doing this sort of thing? It depends. You really have to exercise a good level of control over it. If you're going to have the character helping you, there has to be boundaries for them that they can't overstep in attempting to help you, otherwise it goes downhill REALLY fast.

I don't think it's the sort of thing that most people could replicate because it all relies on the specific rule system that my brain functions by. And my brain is rigid with its rules. Rules are rules, so if they're set, they're not likely to be broken in my case. This isn't the case for most people. It's not really a self-control thing for me either, it's more like I couldn't break the rules even if I really wanted to. They would have to be changed or I would have to be granted permission. It's a long story.

It is important to note that Cyrus really is a mental aid to me. A caregiver in a sense. He will make me take care of myself even if I don't want to. He does battle my self-destructive urges and negative thoughts constantly. His ultimate goal is to make me do what's best for me even if I really don't want to.

And honestly, I need it a lot of the time. Sometimes I really don't want to do things that are good for me. I'm a bit childish in that way. So having Cyrus like, drag me to the bathroom to brush my teeth for example, is really necessary sometimes.

He helps in bigger ways than that too ofc but that would take a LOT of explaining and this is already fairly incoherent. If you have any questions you can absolutely ask and I can try to explain it to the best of my ability!

Ummm what else did I have to say about this. Oh. The awkward part abt him being an "f/o" of sorts.

He's not real so my relationship with him isn't real. I know that. Still, I got feelings for him. That's all there is to it, really. You might see me treat him as a real significant other.

You don't have to remind me that he's not real. I know he isn't. But my feelings are real and I would appreciate it if they were respected.

I can't really think of anything else to add? If you're curious, no, I don't get hallucinations of him or anything like that. He doesn't impede on the real world, he only exists in my imagination. He's like an imaginary friend! If an imaginary friend was like, super intelligent I guess?

Idk. But he helps me, and I'm grateful for him. And I wanted to talk about mental illness a little. It is never easy and I'm convinced it will never be easy. But he makes it more manageable. He takes care of me and looks out for me. Even if it's just me looking out for myself, I could not do it "on my own" like most people can.

Also I don't think he's an alter or anything like that. There's a certain degree of separation between us. I am not Cyrus and he is not me. He just happens to reside with me in. My body. None of this makes sense does it. Point is he can't like front or anything but you can like speak to him I guess? It's more like me relaying messages for him tho

This is a really complex thing that my mind has developed over the years so there's a LOT I'm leaving out again if you're curious plz just ask I love talking abt it

#This is probably RIDDLED with mistakes and incoherencies hut I have been meaningto write this for.#Like. A week or so.#I want you guys to meet Cyrus idk #mecore #Nonrebloggable but all explanations will go in the comments

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pinkseas · 1 year

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[parasocial bestie] me sitting there for a good 12 seconds breathing sharply thru my nose after seeing the wip BUT ITS ALSO A BIG AHA MOMENT IN MY HEAD I KNEW IT bc it just dont. like i knew it just not gonna be the former i mean you Get me its xiaolumi i cant even excuse it when i throw xiao over the wall like way too many times for developmen too so real handshake us throwing our blorbos to the walls equivalent exchange real

"NO BUT I THINK YOURE RUBBING OFF ON ME" is the biggest of all biggest compliments i got from u i feel so proud i have influence at the same time karma hits me knowing i have to endure the fact i shall see more non-context sillies from u and then reading the full thing going jawdrop BUT STILL IN A GOOD WAY CUS ITS FROM THE BESTIE <3333 man i hope nothing bad happens to lumine she got hit to the wall pretty hard there haha amirite sounds harmless right there i love u kiss kiss

HELPPPPP THE AHA MOMENT AND U KNOWING ITS NOT JUST GONNA BE SILLY SILLY we get each other we get it... we r so 🤝🤝🤝❣️💕💖♥️💓💕💖💕❣️♥️❣️<- grabbed my phone just 2 b able 2 use heart emojis <333 but yeah no xiaolumi rly is Like That. one day ill figure out how to best write the snow day fic and THAT will be Silly silly but until then ermmmm

YOU HAVE SUCH STRONG INFLUENCE it is literally embarrassing how many times ill b talking abt xiao or xiaolumi or talking 2 the besties and ill go hmmm what would the Bestie think or hmmm hope the Bestie is vibing today LIKEEEEE. u and xiao and xiaolumi r so tied together in my mind and also ive been wanting to do angstier stuff ever since u appeared in my inbox its so silly of us fr... ur influence !!!!!

omg yeah i hope nothing bad happens to lumi ^_^ shes tough surely she'll be fine surely nothing bad happens surely super strong super buff c6 barbara is right around the corner ^_^ surely nothing will go wrong ^_^ <- realizing that ive presented a Certain Problem without having an actual solution in mind ermmm. we'll figure that one out later folks

KISS KISS MWAH MWAH ILY JUST AS MUCH !!!

#parasocial bestie tag

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rubywithin · 28 days

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Scrolls of Mudorius 9

After a couple more weeks we were able to solve a lot of local village's issues. For a couple of them I had to help build some houses and grow some crops which was exhausting! Then finally we got a request from Lumin City....I needed to go on this mission, (Tormai) "I um really want to take on this Lumin City request Commander!". He looked a little shocked, (Kiyen) "Sorry Torami but this request was given to another squad!". I felt disappointed but I guess it can't be helped since our group has been requested for a lot of manual labour lately. While this one was some sort of stake out to catch a mysterious thief. (Novelle) "I am sure Commander Icaru would be willing to allow you to let you aid in my squads mission!". No was was I finally going to get the chance to go to Lumin City...(Kiyen) "Fine you have my permission to go if Icaru allows it!". I decided to go and pack supplies just in case....Kiyen then stopped me, "Be a bit more careful around Novelle....sorry but I don't trust her!".

-Over at Lumi CIty in a back alley- (Umbrell) "I can't believe you expect me to rummage through these shops!". (???) "We need to find that scroll...my intel was only able to confirm it is in this city. Plus it's your own fault for failing to find it in your home village, if we did we could easily draw out the second owner here". (Umbrell) "They some how knew my attack was coming.....I had to fight a man I respected a lot" (???) "Hmm so what exactly happened?" (Umbrell) "He did not expect me poisoning his food before hand, I took his life....then gave him a burial. I am prepared to one day be judged by his apprentice but before then I hope to see the Blade of Hope!". (???) "Don't worry kid I am sure our allies while locate the third scroll while we collect the one here and the one form your home village!".

-At the entrance to Lumin City- (Tormai) "Wow this place is incredible the buildings look beautiful!". (Novelle) "Ah yes I heard the Lumi clan put a lot of effort into designing the shapes of the buildings. They believed it would appeal those looking on from the after life". I signed after hearing that....we went to the nearest tavern to get a brief on the mission! "There are 5 locations we will be keeping our eyes on a the Market, Jewelers, Blacksmiths, Luminous Book Shop and an Atelier!". I let two others volunteer for locations before me....(Tormai) "I would like to watch the Book Shop!". (Novelle) "Sure thing but I wish to assist you" I wanted to say no but she out ranked me. (Squad Member) "I would take Novelle up on the offer she has basically been leading our squad!". Huh that's interesting to know...I guess the Head Commander wanted to keep her in this squad since she is keeping them together while their Commander is ill. We made our way over to the shop and hung around nearby but not right in front of it!

A few hours passed but there was no suspicious activity at all, I got us some lunch! (Novelle) "Thank you Torami, you can go in the shop if you have some business there". (Torami) "Thanks but shouldn't we focus on the mission over my errand..." (Novelle) "It's fine I'm sure I could take on the thief by myself if they show up!". I ate up and decided to go into the shop, it was pretty big....I reached for the scroll to see if showing the owner it would get me the info I was after. I stood by the counter....suddenly a man stood next to me (???) "I know you and your buddy are watching the place!". I drew my sword without hesitation.....-BANG- I ran outside to see what happened. (Novelle) "That came from the Market place let's hurry! we both rushed over and as we arrive we saw some locals holding the a Light Barrier up I guess to stop the explosion from damaging too much. I then looked around....no it can't be...not him. (Umbrell) "Twin Blade Scar".

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lostacelonnie · 1 year

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Oh hello holy shit i didnt realize that was gonna be such a soon thing for you welcome back. They can try to make aether canon all they want but for me lumine always will be. She has better smug expressions & the game is better with her. I finished the major 3.4 quests & jeht is still so gay for lumine. Same with ayaka during the event. I do not understand faruzan but she's the only 4 star i dont have currently & i want her. Even if she is wanderer support. Fish hangout is the one we deserve along with amber hangout. Monafish is so good i love that fischl is so comfortable with mona & sometimes makes her food. Fischl deserves so much she's my original genshin fave. Dr did irreparable damage to my brain but it was a fun time. My friend group cannot say the correct name anymore we just toss out random mixes of words that start with the same letters. Cryo hypo bad fight its the equivalent annoyance of monstadt's talent domain to me. I cheese rifthound with yoi/xingqiu/albedo/geo grandpa because i hate grinding it. Yo that all sounds so fun! Im jealous you got to see the lights ive always wanted to see them but they dont drop south enough here. Ahh thought that may be so. Avery seems cool i am simply bad at talking to people because social anxiety. I dont. Think i saw a eula ad but i saw her & the cryo ladies have so far been a weakness for me so. Bianka is worth it she's so good. A local used bookstore near me had up to book five of rangers apprentice so i decided to buy them because i can. Love those books.

ahsjfgkgjksfjjk fair. FOR REAL it just feels... Right. ik its supposed to be the same experience no matter which twin u play as but lumine is the superior one. i havent done the quest after the dirge of bilqis yet but yeah she is VERY gay for lumi. ooh havent seen the event yet so if its finished ill probably just check it out on yt. i dont have a BUNCH of 4 stars [xingqiu im sorry my son] but faruzan is interesting. OH MY GOD AMBER HANGOUT SO TRUE.... tho well probably never get it cos she has a story quest T-T but yessss they are so important to me. YEAHHH DANGANRONPA IS. something. but it IS very fun and some chars still kinda live in my brain rent free. fair lmaoooo. also god yeah. mondstadts talent domain is my Enemy. and very understandable, honestly. rifthound worst genshin boss frfr. addhfjkhn it WAS very fun!! and rip, tho im sure youll see them someday !! and yeah i also have social anxiety, but fortunately me and av have known each other for a. Long time irl. and realllllll actually pretty ladies are a surprisingly common reason for me to join new fandoms. bianka my beloved, not only is she pretty meta rn but i also additionally power her by my love. i got into rangers apprentice in like. 3rd grade? 4th grade? because of my classmate and yeah.

#i have school starting on monday so im a little nervous ough TvT #asks #pen pals

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peachiipark · 2 years

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Adult Trio with a s/o with too high fever

I had a bad flu these days and I got the idea

oh no! i hope you're feeling better! being sick sucks. i guess flu season is coming up 😭 i better prepare my awful immune system for the worst!

(edit: ..guess who's getting sick too 😞)

chrollo lucilfer!

chrollo is noticably softer and more careful with you. of course, he can't wait on you hand and foot, but he's there for you!

depending on how long your fever lasts, chrollo will try to cut down his schedule to spend some time with you.

"goodnight, love." he said, trying to lay on the ground instead of your shared bed that you were sprawled out on.

"i'm only sick, chrollo!"

"i cannot afford to be sick. it's a level of weakness that i refuse to be on." chrollo spoke softly, stuffing his head into a pillow.

he always manages not to get sick somehow. you are now convinced that chrollo is not human.

he makes you soup! (though it doesn't look very appetizing).

illumi zoldyck!

"what are you doing? have you been crying?"

"illumi, i'm just sick."

"how could you be so weak to allow that?"

sickness does not exist in the zoldyck kids' vocabulary.

illumi has some butlers care for you, taking everything to the next level. bath? done. breakfast in bed? done. illumi staring at you from the corner of your shared room because he has no idea how to comfort you? ..yeah.

"lumi, come snuggle. you'll cool me down."

"no, y/n. i don't want to spread your illness."

"i'll grab you myself!"

he sighs and just goes with it since he kind of feels bad for you.

has little to no concept on how to be gentle so all of his acts of care become very very forceful.

"eat the soup." "you must drink liquids." "put your phone away and get some rest."

he means well! (..i think)

hisoka morrow!

"i'm going to have to skip our little fight for today. i'm sick."

"but, i'm already outside of your house. are you going to leave your favorite magician hanging?"

he gets a kick out of seeing you so weak. this is the same y/n who threatened to kick his ass today! now, they were defenseless and relied on him for (almost) everything.

he feels a little bad when he realized that you were in a bit of pain.

he might stay in your room and do a few card tricks to cheer you up!

"y/n, darling, can't i just have one kiss?"

"hisoka, no. you'll get sick."

hisoka does not care about getting sick. he just really likes feeling your warmth next to him.

accompany on: to the masterlist!

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ask-lir · 2 years

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Work in Progress!! - With Progress Made!!

As it stands our lovely Lir is in the reworks! updates are going to include a final choice on design, a story that I actually like, and a rework of the blog's visual. it will take time as I have a bad habit of wanting to churn things out and getting burnt out- ill try to avoid that and take my time :3

Small notes for the current blog

Asks and Interactions are open, well im slower than a snail i do look at them.

Old posts are private, I didn't have the heart to delete them. if you want to see an old post i can easy send a screenie

Some lore is now set below! well it maybe in a post i would like everything together along with his official ref!!

Thanks for it all - Mod Bee <3

him tm (small note : OG Design is by @ask-tay-relic and his wifey HLK)

Lir Lore

So for one I have lir to be much older than he was before. rather than being an edgy story for his history hes now just a ball of magic that over time sort off collected itself and gained a conscious that even hes not sure of. he perked from a lake below the crystal empire as i like to think that with rainwater going down the mountain and the natural magic in the earth getting caught in the water is where he comes from but even then im not sure.

For a while he took on no form, before mimicking animals in the forest north of ponyville (the large one generally believed to hug Fluttershys cottage, and be below cloudsdale from when fluttershy fell) at some point he did meet some ponies being Sapphire and Lumi (Up for change) so he mimics them then before slowly changing into his own form he holds onto now. Sap and Lumi have long sense passed and Lir stays more hidden in the forest.

He cranky and admitally cold to ponies for his own reasons and often leads them out of what he veiws as his forest. finding encroaching development harmful to the animals he has grown to care for. he lives in a rundown old cottage, although lived is a debatable word but it well taken care of. he is own to growl and bare teeth like a wolf before being friendly just due to how he has experienced life although he also enjoys pranking those who return, or fouls who come in based on a dare. he doesn't actually ever attack or harm as he more wishes to scare or mess with them. he does however show signs of curiosity and an interest to learn more things but is unwilling to leave his forest due to his distrustful nature.

ive given him the nicknames "Ghost of North Woods / Winter Prince" as he will often switch between a sort of magical blob and using a water body. he has noted that no pony has both a horn and wings and hes unaware of the status associated. for a while he did sport wings but now he opts to not form them unless he wants to be annoying and freak/prank someone out.

He takes after the animals as well, well he is not bonded to one animal in partular he is a general help. letting them drink from his "hair" and being just portable drinkable water. he dosent tend to see the same animal often so he treats them all well.

He dose have sharp teeth like a dog/wolf as it seemly seems to freak out most ponies who come by.

i like to say that at one point, well the rail road though the mountains to the crystal empire was being built Lir was a bit of a pain often causing havoc and rain as he didn't like the railroad as it seems to separate the forest from the lake there. even if a train likely comes once every day or less really.

#lir mlp #update post #mlp oc #mlp ask blog #mlp oc ask blog #Lir the water horse Lore

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some-dr-writings · 3 years

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Rantaro, Nagito, and Kaito’s S/O got sick running around in the rain and attempt to sneak out:

Rantaro Amami:

· “Huh? Noooo, no. You’re staying in bed.” “But-” “No butts- those are for sitting. Now back to bed with you.” You groaned as the man flipped you around and gently shoved you back to the bedroom. “It’s still raining though!” “I know.” Then as if on cue your cough flared up. “It’s exactly why you’re sick now. You can’t keep running out there.” “Ugh. Whatever! Do you know when was the last time I saw rain!?” “Two years ago for our sea-” “Two years ago back in our search in France! I miss the rain; how can you expect me to not run around and dance in it!” Rantaro laid you in bed, tucking you in as snuggly as he could. “Doctor’s orders.” “What doctor!?” With a smile he bowed, kissing you on the forehead. “Doctor Rantaro Amami at your service. Now, this good doctor is off to get you some medicine. No running in the rain.”

· Though Rantaro hated you being miserable, admittedly he was absolutely indulging in this, getting to just dote on you completely, it was fun to him. It was also a bit nostalgic, sending him back to days where one of his sisters were sick so he got to play doctor and the others would act as nurses or other doctors and try to help Rantaro make soup, or cheer up their sister or any number of other things, even dragging one another out into the snow and quickly all of them getting ill. He missed his little assistants and colleges but… this was still nice. This also felt different since his patient was his partner. He couldn’t quite place his finger on what felt different exactly, but it did. Perhaps instead of a carer like he was for his sisters it was just pulling his partner back onto their feet… maybe that was the-

· “Hey! No running in the rain.” “Why are you in the kitchen! I thought you were getting medicine!” “I thought a nice hot meal would help. Now back to bed with you.” “Noooooooooo” “Y/N!?” Rantaro panicked for a moment, you having crumpled to the ground. A sigh of relief had escaped him seeing you were relatively alright. “Come on.” “nooooooo” With his hands on his hips he looked down to you. “Alright then.” And with all his might he lifted you up and carried you back to bed. You were too exhausted to fight back anymore and just went along with it. “huh? Going to bed with me?” “Yeah.” He hugged you tightly, snuggling into you. “Seems cuddles is the only way to make sure you don’t go running off again.” He felt so giddy when you nuzzled into him. Even if he got stick because of this, it was well worth it.

Nagito Komaeda:

· For most others the rainy season was much more accident prone than the rest of the year with the water bringing slick ground, but for some as… lucky as Nagito it was just like any other time. Truthfully he might have actually liked it more than others for one sole reason. You huddling so close to him under your shared umbrella. No matter what, whenever Nagito bumped into you on a rainy day, SOMETHING would happen to either one of your umbrellas whether it be them braking or getting carried away by the wind and the pair of you would end up sharing.

· This time was slightly different however “Hey Nagi- AH!” Suddenly a large gust of wind crashed into you, toppling you over, and you losing your umbrella in the process. You sighed seeing you were now drenched. It melted his heart seeing how you so softly smiled to him as he held his umbrella over you. “Thank you.” You took his outstretched hand, lifting you to your feet, even holding you close which really surprised you. “I’m sorry trash like me is the only one around to help you.” There it was. “Nagito please yo-” You clung to Nagito and he to you as more wind crashed by, sending the pair of you toppling down the hill and almost into the street and off the walkway. You ended up having to run, the pair of you trying to protect the other by holding your jacket over the other’s head.

· “Ugh, of course you lucky bastard doesn’t get sick.” You burried your face behind your quilt trying to cover up your coughs. “I’m so sorry, it was because you were wit-” “Shut up. Nothing is your fault, we were literally in a storm, I probably would have gotten sick anyway.” You placed your now empty bowl of oatmeal aside only for Nagito to immediately take it and trot over to the kitchen for cleaning.

· Upon returning to your room though he was surprised to find you gone. “Y/N?” “Here.” … The front door? There you stood, shakily taking a trench coat off the rack and placing it on. “Oh no, you don’t need to go out, let me take care of it.” Confusedly you looked over your shoulder to him before taking your hat and placing it on. A light chuckle bubbled out of you before it was abruptly cutoff by raspy coughs. “I-I don’t think you can take my place at work.” “You’re going to work!?” “Bills can’t pay for-” Your stance wavered, you leaning against the door for balance as more coughs bust from your chest. “… I’m calling you in sick.” “Eh- no!” “Yes I am.” “No you’re not!” “I am. You are sick and can’t show the world just how great you are. You need to be healthy in all ways to do that, and I will not sit idly by as you hurt and push yourself. Now go to bed and rest and let me take care of everything else. I can at least do that.”

· …

· Never before had you seen Nagito place his foot down on something. You stayed in bed wanting to encouraging this will. This was something Nagito wanted for himself in a way, and him wanting for himself or thinking he was worthy was so extremely rarer. As antsy as you were to get back to work you stayed home, and let Nagito care for you.

Kaito Momota:

· “Looks like it’ll rain.” “No it won’t.” You grumbled looking out the window. “It NEVER rains around here. Last time was like, what? Five years ago? And before that it was eight.” “I don’t know, those clouds are dark.” “We’ve had dark clouds before.” You sighed looking out to the gray world. Winter was so dull when you lived in a place where it didn’t now… or had any weather outside of sunny or partly could really, there was nothing else, it was so boring. In winter the world was just… empty and monochrome seeming. You sat at your desk, continuing your paperwork while Kaito was leaning out the open window looking towards that ever darkening sky.

· “… Leave.” “Huh!?” He looked to you as if completely offended by that single word. “You look too fetching with the wind tussling your hair, now out of my office.” You pointed to the grand doors for a moment with our pen before going back to work. Silence filled the room as Kaito took in your words. As much as he loved you sometimes it pissed him off how stoic and monotone you always were. “What!?” You didn’t even look up to him as he slammed a hand on your desk. “You heard me.” “Oh no. You don’t get to compliment me and have no tone! Put some passion into it!” “You know how I show my passion.” “Exactly, and that was not it! Put your all into it!” “You are handsome.” “… That was pathetic! Nothing! THIS is passion!” Taking your chin between his thumb and pointer finger he tilted up your head so you’d finally face him. “You are the most gorgeous person on this or any other world. You are the love of my life, my only sun in a sea of stars, the one who I can bare to stray too far from. You are the light of my life, the only one who keeps everything going… Now THAT is passion.” After a moment a small smirk pulled on the corners of your lips. “Finally you give my daily dose of serotonin. What took you so long?” “Eh- Did you just trick me into say-” Before Kaito could finish his sentence though you grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, pulling him into a kiss.

· It was a rarer moment of stunned silence from Kaito, after parting him just looking to you in awe. “Now THAT’S what I was-” “Seriously, get out.” “Wait! You call me handsome so emotionlessly and now you tell me to get out so lovingly!?” Still so lovingly looking to him you pressed a button on the landline phone on your desk. “Call security. My husband is refusing to leave the office again.” “Now wait just a minute!” You chuckled seeing you so easily got a rise out of him.

· Suddenly you both were snapped from your thoughts hearing something. “Hah! I told you it was going to rain!” Kaito skipped to the window, gleeful closing it. “You shouldn’t have doubted your Luminary of The Stars!” Kaito was confused hearing no response. He looked to you, finding you were just staring out the window. You simply walked up to him and opened the window again, not flinching as rain crashed into you. Then suddenly you were just gone, the doors to your office suddenly wide open. Then Kaito heard cheering, and looking down, he saw you running around outside.

· “My world!?” Out of breath Kaito leaned against the open front doors of the building while you were laughing, and spinning around nonstop. “IT’S RAAAAAAIIIIIIINNNIIIIINNNNNNNNG!” Kaito just stood there in absolute shock. This looked like his spouse but… could this be you!? You were bursting with emotion, so unabashedly happy, excited, jubilant! You were never one to hide you emotions, but it was never often you showed much emotion and when you did it was more so subtle or in small bursts, that was just your nature, but this- “WWWWWAAAAAHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! IT’SRAININGIT’SRAININGIT’SRAININGIT’SRAININGIT’SRAININGIT’SRAININGIT’SRAININGIT’SRAININGIT’SRAINING! IT! IS! RRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNNNIIIIIINNNNNGGGGGGG!” Laughter bubbled up from Kaito’s chest as he dashed out to join you, dancing, running, and spinning around, both with beaming smiles on your faces!

· The rain lasted for a few days and seemingly neither of you ever took a break, even when night fell you saying you had to enjoy this weather while it lasted before it left for years again! The moment it left though… “Ugh… Lumi pass me the tissues please.” “Sure… My world, could you get me the headache medicine? “Yeah.” You were both bedridden. It was fine though at least you got to cuddle all day.

· “Lumi… Hey Luminary.” Slowly Kaito awoken. “What is-” “Shhh. Listen.” “……… rain?” He smiled seeing how your eyes sparkled. You both lied in bed for a moment longer loving the warmth before dashing out of the house, still in your pajamas into the rain, laughing and dancing away.

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raineeskiesabove · 3 years

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What about angsty Venlumi like Venti taking an arrow for Lumine?

Hi anon, I made this into a oneshot if that’s okay. I’m not sure what I wrote, since I did it while I’m feeling ill so uh;;; enjoy? eheh...

The Stars Will Not Take You | Venti x Lumine Oneshot

It was supposed to be a simple commission. Take out the hilichurl camp, remove any leftover structures, collect and go home. Venti had been there. He was supposed to protect her. So why, instead of singing and laughing with her that evening, he was holding onto her lifeless hand, with the fleeting hope that she would awaken?

As the walked along the road bordering the outskirts of Monstadt, Venti hummed playfully, practicing a new song as they walked. Despite being on their way to a potentially dangerous commission, Venti was as happy as ever. Lumine chuckled to herself, stealing glances at his cheerful smile. She increased her grip around his fingers slightly, relishing in the warmth of his skin against hers. It was moments like this that made her feel at ease. He made her feel like everything would be alright, which is something she desperately needed to stave off the flood of doubts and fears that plagued her mind.

“Venti,” she placed her index finger against her lips, emphasizing for him to quiet himself. They had reached the hilichurl camp.

Huddled in a nearby bush, Lumine’s eyes widened upon seeing the horde occupying the camp. The commission paper stated that the group would be small, not an entire tribe. Maybe more.

“Lumi I don’t know about this. There are too many for simply making a pretty penny. And there are only two of us,” he whispered, the singsong tone in his voice now gone.

Lumine shook her head, “No, we need this money. I’m running low from buying supplies and we must move forward soon. We can’t waste time, Venti,” she explained, face and voice steady as stone.

Venti sighed, his grip now tightening around her slightly smaller hand.

He shook his head, “I cannot allow this. What if something goes amiss?” His words rang in his ears, the realization that he trespassed on his own principles made him bite his tongue.

“We’ll be alright, I can take them. As long as you support me from the rear, that money is as good as ours.”

The bard looked away, his eyebrows knit in a slight scowl. Who was he to stop her? Lumine was free to make her own choices, even if it meant putting herself at risk.

“Fine. I shall support you. Please be careful,” he pleaded.

She brushed a hand against his cheek, kissing his forehead softly in reassurance. Offering him a small smile, she whispered that she would be careful, before standing to lead their small siege.

Initially, the attack went well. Venti used his winds to knock the hilichurls off their feet, giving Lumine more time to clear the way. She fought gracefully, her sword slicing through her enemies effortlessly, her footwork more akin to a dancer than a fighter. Venti consciously told himself to focus, for fear of growing lost in her performance, and yet, the windward god still failed.

“Venti, look out!”

He heard her, but it was much too late to react, the next moment bringing him back to a harsh reality. A sharp pain erupted at his shoulder, an arrow imbued with pyro had struck him. The bard let out a yelp in pain, the arrow burning him from the inside out. The chants of the hilichurls grew louder, now closing in on his vulnerable form. He used his other hand to channel Anemo to hold them off, but it proved difficult to cast with only one arm.

“Venti!” Lumine shouted through a crowd of hilichurls, the monsters falling at her hand as she drew closer to him.

“Lumi, don’t! There are too many! Retreat before- ” his sentence was cut off by another arrow, this time one imbued with electro, sunken deeply into his thigh. His leg twitched at the sensation, the jolts of electricity making his leg grow limp and numb.

“Venti, no!”

For the first time, Venti saw fear flash through Lumine’s golden eyes, her complexion growing pale from seeing her beloved being slowly chipped away. It was impossible for her to reach him, the hilichurls creating an impassable barrier between them. He offered a small smile, mouthing for her to go, praying that she would follow his orders. As he did so, yet another arrow struck his small frame, this time cryo against his side. The impact made him cough, blood spilling from the corners of his lips. She couldn’t stand it anymore. With a strangled cry, she used all of her power to summon a tornado, the sheer force causing many of the monsters to grow caught up in the storm. The larger mitachurls, however, remained unfazed, only growing irritated by the gusts of wind. In her worry, Lumine failed to notice this, ignoring them in favor of making a mad dash towards the staggered Venti.

As a seasoned archer, it was common knowledge that arrows should not be pulled out, for fear of excessive bleeding. But gods, did the added elemental damage hurt. Admittedly, he grew more hopeful as Lumine grew closer, happy that she had fought so hard to protect him.

His happiness quickly dissipated, however, upon seeing a mitachurl charging straight for her. Lost in her emotions, Lumine’s reaction was slowed, her sword only enough to reduce the severity of the major slice the monster inflicted across her midsection.

No. No, no, no. This wasn’t happening.

Immediately, Venti pulled all three arrows from his body, blood already soaking through his clothing as he drew his bow to fire. His shoulder burned as he released Wind’s Grand Ode, the force of the bowstring making him hiss in pain. With the mitachurl out of the way, Venti rushed to Lumine, her form now twisted and lifeless against the bloodstained grass.

“Lumi!”

Her entire chest and abdomen had been sliced open, blood pooling around her unconscious form. He placed his hands against the wound to curb the bleeding, but at this rate she didn’t have long to live.

“No, no. Celestia, no! Lumine, you can’t die on me!”

Already, his hands were dyed red with her blood, her breathing growing extremely shallow and faint. He felt tears begin to stream down his face as he wailed hopelessly. They were miles from the nearest statue or Monstadt, and he himself could barely walk, let alone carry her.

“It is unlike you to be bested so easily in battle, Lord Barbatos,” a voice thundered.

Venti looked up, finding himself face to face with Dvalin, a previous member of the Four Winds. A dear friend of his.

Venti sniffed, trying to wipe away the snot running down his face. “D-dvalin. My friend, I plead for your aid in this hour of need. Not for myself, but for her. Please, help me to protect what I hold most dear,” he sobbed.

Dvalin blinked. Never had he seen the archon so vulnerable. So devastated. The warm smile and bouts of laughter that typically sounded from him were nowhere to be seen, instead replaced by a look that made his heart grow heavy.

“A statue, or Monstadt, my lord?”

“Monstadt. This wound is too complex for the statue’s effects.”

He never left her side. Regrettably, he snapped at the clerics when they asked him to leave and return in the morning, to which he refused to do so. Now, alone with her sleeping form, Venti sighed, rubbing his thumb along her knuckles.

“I shouldn’t have lost my temper at them. They were only trying to help. Just like how you were back there. That’s something I love about you. But at the same time... it frightens me. Deeply. What would I do if you were to suddenly disappear?” he whispered to her, his voice trembling with fear from his own words.

As he held back another set of tears, he heard a faint whisper, “...not going anywhere,” she said. She moved her hand to hold his weakly, her eyes opened a crack to see his crying face.

“Lumi? Oh, I’m so sorry. I- I failed to protect you, and I should’ve pulled the arrows out sooner and gone to help and-“

She cut him off with a bandaged finger to his lips. “Venti, love, don’t blame yourself,” she assured, offering a small smile before attempting to sit up.

She winced from the movement, Venti feeling powerless in only holding onto her hand and the small of her back. He leaned in closer to take her in a gentle embrace, his tears now staining her white infirmary shirt. His free hand moved from her back to her hair, gripping it protectively.

“Lumine, promise me something,” he choked, ignoring her previous remark.

She combed her own hand through his hair, saying nothing.

“Promise me, please don’t disappear,” he whispered.

She didn’t say anything for a long time, and Venti began to wonder if she had fallen back asleep.

“Venti, look at me,” she said, pulling away. “Do you see me?”

He nodded, “Every beautiful bit.”

She smiled sheepishly, trying not to get sidetracked. “Yes, and thus, my promise is already fulfilled, my love,” she said.

“Huh?”

“Even if I am gone, you will always remember me. I will not be forgotten, and that’s enough for me.”

“But it isn’t for me! You need to live, Lumine!”

“Of course I will, I wouldn’t want to live a day apart from you. But someday, we will be forced apart. It will happen, Venti. But I promise, that somewhere among the stars, we will meet again,”

“Lumine...”

“People are separated, but never for forever, my dear,” she placed her forehead against his, looking into his eyes earnestly. “Do not worry, my archon,” she half joked, letting out a small chuckle.

He sighed, smiling from the influence of her laughter. “Your words indeed ring true, my disciple,” he replied, nuzzling against her soft cheek. “But I will protect you from harm’s way, so that the stars may claim you another day.”

#venti x lumine #venti #genshin impact #lumine #venlumi #genshin impact lumine #genshin impact traveler #genshin venti #genshin impact venti #venti headcanons #traveler x venti #venti x traveler #venti x reader #venti x mc

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haikyooot · 3 years

Text

Repose

Pairing: Daishou Suguru x gn!reader

WC: 0.8k

Genre/Tags: comfort, fluff, established relationship

A/N: For the lovely Lumie @sugushou~ Thank you so much for joining the MYML event and taking a leap-of-faith. LOL ty for your patience I know I dropped the preview of the banner in your dms ages ago >x<

The thunderstorm envelops the cityscape in a blanket of rain. You have a thick comforter wrapped tightly around you, sniffling from a stuffy nose. Too tired, too ill, you listen to the endless drums of droplets tapping and running down the glass window. Tap. Tap tap tap. The room is so chilly; you shudder, trying to pull the comforter as close to you as possible. The glass next to your bed is empty—been empty, but the few steps to the kitchen seem like a perilous journey.

Maybe it'll be better to just sleep it off, yea, sleep...sleep. But it's too hard.

The room is quiet, only inhabited by you. If only Daishou is around, you miss him. You feel around the bed for your phone, but even after patting around, again and again, all you touch is the mattress and no device.

Rain continues to race down the windows. Tap tap tap. It's too loud and jarring to be the rain, like an awkward beat that's out of rhythm.

You manage to pull yourself up a bit to press your face against the icy cold glass and squint, peering into the darkness for a sign. Your eyes spot another pair of eyes, two floors down on the ground level. A smile cracks on your tired face seeing Daishou, peeking out from under his huge, obnoxious umbrella waving frantically at you, trying to signal to you, I'm coming up, open the door.

It's as though seeing him lifts all stress and struggles from your shoulders. You roll yourself out of bed, the comforter is still wrapped around you, half of it trailing on the floor like some royal cape. Meanwhile, Daishou circles the small apartment complex and arrives at the door just in time for you to open it.

He comes in, shoes squeaking and soaked from the rain. How come you're here? You want to ask but he beats you to the question.

"How are you feeling?"

"Good," you respond automatically without a passing thought.

"Lies," he mutters, setting a bag on the table, "bet you feel awful."

Daishou's sometimes sharp-tongued and part of it really comes through in just how well he knows you. He just knows when you dismiss things or stay stuff out of habit rather than honesty. "Heh, yea."

You take a seat on the edge of the couch, watching him quickly clean out the kitchen sink you're too tired to take care of. Dishes rinsed and into the washer, countertops wiped...Daishou dumps out the water in the kettle and refills it, pressing the tab down to boil before coming over to you. He kneels down to your level and puts a hand across your forehead before feeling his own.

Daishou does this back and forth twice, thoroughly focused, commenting to himself, "feels quite warm, probably a fever...hmm". He doesn't notice your eyes studying his scrunched-up face until you press a finger to the middle of his brows, smoothing out the creases forming there.

You find it kind of cute how serious he can get when it's about you. "You'll get wrinkles there."

He envelops your hand with his own, running a soothing thumb across your skin. "All because I'm so worried. You didn't pick up your phone all day."

"Ah, speaking of that, I was looking for it just earlier..."

"Maybe it's a good thing, you're so busy all the time. Your phone's hiding to give you a break," he takes a seat on the couch next to you, pulling you onto his lap so he can tightly hold you close, blankets and all. "No matter how busy or stressful work gets...don't forget to take care of yourself first."

"Okay, I'll try," you murmur. "Suguru?"

"Hm?"

You snuggle closer to him, "Miss you."

"Me too baby. I-"

Hearing the kettle boil, you scooch over a bit to let Daishou go, albeit a bit reluctantly.

"I'll be right back," he tells you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. He knows.

A moment later, Daishou comes back with a mug and some cold medicine...and your phone. You look at the phone weirdly and prepare to ask where he found it.

"Believe it or not, in the drawer with all the kitchen utensils."

"..."

"Weird I know. Wouldn't be surprised if I found it in the freezer instead."

You let out a little snort that he finds adorable. He’s just glad that you’re still finding it amusing; at the very least you still have some energy to laugh at him.

Daishou watches you take the cold medicine and sip on the warm drink he made. It's not the cold medicine that makes you feel better, you want to reason, it's him. Just him. Especially now with his arms wrapped around you once again.

"Sleep now, you'll feel a lot better afterward."

"What about you?" You can feel your lids becoming heavier, lulled by the droning sounds of the storm outside and the wave-like rhythm from Daishou's breaths.

"I'm not going anywhere."

You smile, fully relaxed and content, the atmosphere cozier than ever.

"What if...you get...sick-bug from me?" you mumble quietly, drawn away into a dreamy haze.

The last thing you remember is the impression of his chest rumbling slightly from a quiet laugh. He whispers, so gently and faintly, "Then you take care of me."

When you're down, I'll be there for you. When I'm not feeling well, you'll be there for me. We'll take care of each other.

#daishou x reader #daishou suguru x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios #daishou suguru #emi.freshtea #myml #🍵.daishou

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tokoyamisstuff · 3 years

Text

Betrothed Ch. 11 - Illumi Zoldyck x Reader

Chapter 11: Broken

Summary: Illumi cannot escape his past - but sometimes that fact isn’t all that bad.

Warnings: Death, Blood, Angst, the usual.

Words: ~2500

A/N: Sorry guys, this chapter probably sucks. When I’m working night-shifts I become erradic and can’t think straight, but I still wanna write, so...

Story Masterlist

No one knows what it’s like to be the bad man To be the sad man behind blue eyes. And no one knows what it’s like to be hated. To be fated to telling only lies. But my dreams they aren’t as empty as my conscience seems to be. I have hours only lonely. My love is vengeance, that’s never free.

- Limp Bizkit: Behind Blue Eyes

“Keep good care of Alluka, okay?”

He only nodded in response. You never doubtet him to protect her, yet also couldn’t help reminding him either after everything he’s been through.

After all, his fear of Illumi made him forget about his locked away sister for such a long time...

“And you’ll be listening to your brother, right?”

“Aye!” the little girl cheered, pecking the flustered boy on the cheek.

It was actually very adoring to look at those two siblings who were finally reunited, now able to make up for the time they’ve lost.

The only companion you’d take with you was your familiar Luna, and you also didn’t want to rely on Alluka’s powers now that you had a hint to your husband’s whereabouts.

Your sister-in-law had been through enough, and she also was way more than just someone to grant wishes. She had desires, dreams and a future to look out for. Both of them.

Gladly, Killua could tell you about all safehouses in Yorknew City so the Zoldyck family wouldn’t notice about you prying around. That information was more than enough for your search.

“What are you going to do from now on?”

“Getting my husband back, obviously” you shrugged at Killua’s words, clutching the ace of spades you were holding. Hisoka had given it to you - infused with a powerful nen, you could contact him whenever you felt it necessary.

“I know that’s all very much for you...” Yes, Killua had struggled with his brother’s mental illness ever since his birth. And now to act like all of that never happened just because you told him he had a change of heart? It seemed almost impossible. “So take your time processing things. We won’t bother you until you’re ready.”

Rumpling up the boy’s white hair, you grinned widely at your friends before you boarded the airship.

You were already halfway across the ocean when you got a message from Killua, warming your cautious heart:

“I’m glad you’ve joined our family. Save him.”

Days passed by as you searched safehous after safehous, as well as every shady corner of the city. Much to your dissatisfaction, your husband had always been gone as soon as you reached the scene of crime.

“I’ll find him, no matter what!” you thought just before you reached the next safehouse, deep in the mountains surrounding the great city. He had seemingly destroyed the Zoldyck Personal Transmitter, just as you had - both blessing and curse.

The view was breathtaking, yet you didn’t bother yourself with wasting any minute enjoying it. Luna’s cry told you that you were near, and that was all that counted right now.

Because there were only three spots left, and what if you’d search for him in vain and he had already left Yorknew City? Your guts twisted very unpleasantly at the thought, making it a lot harder to climb the last pile of rocks.

And there it was - a small brick house, nothing more than a one-room-apartment with the most needed items to survive a short time.

There were lights on inside, you clearly saw them from afar.

Fearing that he would leave if he noticed you, there was no other option left than to surpress your Nen completely, leaving you defenseless against every possible threat.

But when you entered, there was no one there - except...

“Oh?” As you stepped into the dim cancle light of the room, a small cat stumbled in between your legs, purring happily. “Who are you, sweetheart?”

Seems like Illumi made a friend, huh?

The thought alone made your heart feel like it’ll burst out of happiness as you pet the animal’s head, noticing that Illumi had treated it’s wounds.

Leaving Luna and the cat get to know each other, you roamed around the room, searching for any possible hint on Illumi’s location.

The house seemed to still be occupied, so should you just wait here for him?

But then, the TV that he seemingly forgot to turn off bursted the local news:

“The auction is only expected to take place in a few weeks, but the preparations are already in full swing. Even though everone is talking about the possibility of the Phantom Troupe blowing up the occasion, rumors about ‘special measurements’ have been spread. The organizers did not want to comment, however they assured us the auction will run safe and peaceful.”

“Organizers my ass” you gritted your teeth. Everyone on the world knew the legendary Ten Dons were secretly holding an Underground Auction, with the ‘legal’ one just being a distraction.

But now you could very well imagine where your lover has headed up to...

It’s the same every year. Many assassins would gather to protect the auction, very well paid by the Dons.

A very good occasion to start wiping out the profession of assassins completely.

Finding the place of action was no problem. A quick research and you knew that the tallest hotel in town was in their possession, where the assassins would probably be allowed to stay until the big occasion.

The hardest part however was what in the world you could do if you arrived there...

“P-Please, have mercy!”

As you broke into the building and entered the conference hall, the blood-bath was already in full swing, the true strenght of your husband unfolding in front of your very eyes.

“Sorry, but I cannot make exceptions” Illumi spoke calmly, hitting his enemy’s head with a needle.

There were twenty-five - no, thirty corpses laying around.

Did he really single-handedly kill all those highly professional assassins? Then again, you had never seen him go all out before...

Even though your husband seemed to have granted them a quick death, everything was a mess. Broken furniture, scattered bodyparts and puddles of blood everywhere.

Illumi obviously didn’t need any help, but the moment you saw another enemy try to attack him from behind, you snapped.

Before you could even comprehend what happened, your body had acted before your mind, leaving you only able to watch as the man fell to the ground.

That wasn’t right. Those assassins were mostly hunters, who arrested or killed criminals. They weren’t guilty or worthy of death.

And yet you did it...it was a reflex, your inherent wish to help Illumi being stronger than your rationality.

So you stood stock still as your husband turned around, furrowing his brows at the injured person laying at his feet - and finished him off.

"Oh? Y/N...” Why did his tone have to be so cheerfull, even at times like this? “What are you doing here?”

As if this was a casual chat, he stepped over several corpses until he faced you, while still remaining his distance.

You gulped harshly, even after all this time not prepared for this moment. “I-I was searching for you.”

“What for?” he plainly retorted, stepping harshly on one of the twitching bodies. “I’m glad to see you’re alright, but you shouldn’t be here.”

Folding your hands to keep them from shaking, it made your following words seem only more as if you were praying. “Because I want you to come back to me. Please...”

“I can’t do that, Y/N” he said and his pained smile ripped your heart in thousand pieces. “I’m too dangerous to be with you. I see that now. It’s no wonder you didn’t trust me back then - since I can’t even trust myself.”

Seeing your face stained with tears made him struggle with the wish to cradle you in his arms, soothing you like he always did. But he refrained from doing so.

“Don’t be sad.” He rose his bloodied hands in the air, gesturing across the room. "I found something I want to do. See? I’ll cleanse the world of other monsters like me and make it more safe for you!”

“Lumi...” Hearing this familiar nickname in your most alluring voice made him drop the facade for only a mere second. “...are you crying?”

“Huh? So that’s what it is.” Only now Illumi realized that he had been weeping as well, touching his face in surprise. He had already forgotten that he was able to cry as well."Yeah. It happens a lot lately.”

“Illumi, love-” you now pleaded, breaking out in convulsive sobbing. “You’re sick, you know that. But that’s not the right way...”

“No need to worry” he tried to compromise, pointing to his neck. “I used a needle on myself, in case my parents should get the better off me again. If I ever hurt someone innocent again, it’ll tear my aorta apart and I’ll die.”

You dared to take a few steps in his direction, but he backed off. “There’s no other way, Y/N. You’re the only one allowed to put an end to my life if you wish, but nothing else.”

“If I die, I’ll make up at least for a fraction of my deeds” Illumi thought to himself, his face now contorting to a rather mad smirk. “Y/N will be safe.”

You said nothing - no, you were left unable to speak.

Seeing the love of your life suffering so much was just too hard for you to bear.

“I’m not worthy of your love, Y/N.” God knows when he managed to appear right in front of you, but somehow he did, softly raising your chin. “I’ll never be” he added, wiping away your tears with his thumb.

“Y-You...” Softly sniveling, you embraced your husband, face wetting the fabric of his shirt. “You don’t need to be ‘worthy’. Love doesn’t work that way, Lumi. I’ll always love you! That’s up to me and you can’t just change that fact!”

“I could” he suggested himself, struggling with the temptation to kiss all your pain away. A needle could make you hate him, or even forget it all.

But he had promised himself to never manipulate other people or cut their freedom, even if just for their safety.

It was your own decision how to feel, or how you’d deal with it.

“Do you really still not remember, Lumi?”

“What exactly?” Your husband didn’t move an inch as you grabbed him tight, afraid he’d leave as soon as you let go.

“You spared me back then” you whispered, shivering as you tried to get a hold of him again. "We were still young, but you were already under their influence...”

Illumi clearly began to shake too, making you regret the previous words. Of course they would cause a flashback...

“Do you remember?”

“Vividly.”

Your husband must’ve been sixteen around that time - yet already a completely trained, fearsome assassin.

Who was his target again? He couldn’t remember.

All he knew was that the orders were to “kill the target as well as it’s allies and leave no witnesseses behind”. The job was precize, requiring to act quick to clean up every proof.

And then there was you.

Still in midst of your hunter education, you were assigned by your family to become the bodyguard over that certain politician, following him on his every step.

But now you saw it all in front of you: Illumi, with his hands firmly strangulating your airway.

He hadn’t developed his Nen abilities at the time, therefore having to do the job with his bare hands. And since you were the last one he had to get rid of, there was no need to hurry.

It was a strange feeling to have such a beautiful person writhing underneath him, piercing him with their pleading look.

Somehow it was a shame you had to die so early, and under those circumstances...

Just when you felt yourself passing out from lack of oxygen, you refrained from trying to pull his hands away - and placed one softly on his cheek.

Illumi froze, shocked by your deed. He had taken so many lives, made countless people suffer already...

But you were the only one who looked at him with such kind, sad eyes...absent of any hint of grudge.

You coughed heavily before you were able to corak out the question burning on your tongue: Why did he stopp fulfilling his mission?

"Yes, why...” he asked himself as well, rubbing the cheek you had just stoked. That sensation, the gentleness and affection of your touch was so foreign to him that he completely lost himself for a moment.

“Why didn’t you struggle?” he turned the interrogation around, almost forgetting about the severe situation both of you were in.

“Dunno” you shuddered, just now realizing that you had given in to your fate just seconds ago. “You seemed kind of sad.”

What?!? This must be some kind of trick!

“Does someone force you to do this?” The compassionate expression on your face scared him, making him want to run away from what he did not know. “You don’t seem happy to do this.”

“I don’t feel anything” the teenager scoffed, taken aback by your worry and care. “I am a highfunctioning tool of darkness and nothing more.”

"How sad...” You cracked a weak smile, and it’s brightness was enough to make him flee, your last words still spinning in his head. “I think under different circumstances, I would’ve loved to become your friend!”

You really were something else...flirting with an enemy that tried to kill you?!? Talking about being insane...

“I get now why my family was so much against our marriage...it’s a joke, really...”

It was a mystery how you didn’t recognize him right away, and how you only now remembered. They had to change all the facts, spending a huge amount of money to silence anyone knowing the truth.

Your name got changed, and everyone would have to act like you were their second child - because the one on the mission had died back then.

So the wrath of the Zoldycks wouldn’t caugh up with you to finish their job.

“You liked me...” Illumi let out a shaky breath, “...even back then.”

“Sure!” you now chuckled weakly, trying to brighten the mood. “How could one not fall for those eyes?”

“I tried to kill you.”

“You didn’t.”

Leading his hands to your neck, you wanted to show just how much you trusted him. And immediately, his hands, wandered up to your face, softly suqeezing and stroking it as if he was making sure this wasn’t just a dream or an hallucination. “You’d never hurt me, Lumi. I know that.”

And finally, he cupped your face, hesistantly moving his own closer to yours.

“Is it really okay for me to love you?” he whimpered ever so slightly - but you already pushed your lips onto his until they were inseparable.

“Yes, it is.”

_____

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@roseburry-jam @food-cures-all @oprah-winfriess @ullinic @sun-and-moon-elfingsmeme @chocolateislovr @sapphic-ghoul@coco724 @jessiejunebug@yukiwins@weflyinfluff@readlatersnowy @gibk @spasmodicterror@djgirl66@pweeenis@trblsicheng @theromaniangirl@cluelessmxnd@s1sterofthemoon @spasmodicterror @note-reblog@tamxixxx@orophaea @frankenduffy @cinnamon-beans @8-ash@cherryyongs @destructive-memories@patheticgay69@sappyisyourpappy @sadferalgremlin @selca11@itsfakearies@djgirl66 @rizawantspizza@g-creevan913 @oprah-winfriess@actressania @rolo-at-midnight @slutforpapawise@myminmango @scatter-mind001 @mimilovesfantrolls @the-temple-pythoness@g-creevan913 @jovialnoise @gibk @callumi@jiminie666@justhavefunwithit @nadzhaf @corpse-deactivated20011031 @mariana-127 @menhwra @rolo-at-midnight@jaz-plaz @loser-alert @illumifucker69 @leenaofarc@catlovesdogs17 @softvgold @gibk @bungeedummy @cinnamon-beans @illum1swhore @avaskylynnbrook @winchescumberholland@beifongt @kalxswin @reblogmeplease @kola95 @xxx-angelic@megurururu @melkuuu12 @angrymuffoun @illumiswifx @lunasin @yukiwins @angrymuffoun @shinakugo @avaskylynnbrook @heda-mikaelson @toandtvd-daily @aryu-azaha @bbunnycore @night-shadowblood-writes2@jasonpetertoddismygod @oya-noya @lolnoyoudontknowme@applekenm @nohxmanity @djgirl66 @groundbeefella @nohxmanity @actressania @doliren @pinetomyapple @cinnamon-beans @phos-faust @dailydumsterfirewithsass @winchescumberholland @1-800-jana-bitch @bella04martinez @la-la-la-land @bobfood @dopunopumain @xemonerdx @wicked-watering-can @muzanscumslut @awianeaves

Feedback is always appreciated!

#Illumi Zoldyck #Illumi Zoldyck x Reader #HxH #Illumi x Reader #Illumi Zoldyck x You #Illumi x You #Illumi/Reader #Illumi/You #Illumi Zoldyck/Reader #Illumi Zoldyck/You #Self Insert #Fanfiction #Writing #Arranged Marriage AU

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