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#im not tagging anything else because like i said ive already made this post
laithraihan · 10 days
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I'm the anon who sent you the long message that apparently came off "pompous & infantilizing" and more to your followers.
I find it interesting that that message sparked such a flood of defenders, when I did not send it in bad faith at all. From your answer it seems I'm lacking context so sorry if I took some of your statements the wrong way, but nonetheless I just found the parental love addition strange and reacted to that, that was all there was to it. I clearly stated (three times) I'm not taking any issue with your headcanons.
By saying they are far removed from canon I did not mean to say they are "too unrealistic" or something is wrong with that, I literally said the opposite. I meant just that, that factually, this will not be a common interpretation for someone who is familiar with the source material but not your blog. This is not a statement that I made with any judgemental value and I thought I made that very clear but apparently not.
So I'm sorry for the additional ask.
Have a nice day.
Thank you for the response.
I was fully aware you said there was no issue with what I drew, but the way you wrote everything else sort of negated that statement. At least that's how me and many other people saw it.
If someone finds what I drew strange or confusing then they could always just... block me or ask me about it (and btw I expected people to be confused, otherwise I wouldnt have labeled it "non-coupling" as soon I posted it lol)
Someone did ask me about it, and you seem to have already seen that response, yet you still felt the need to send another message basically implying that an explanation wasn't enough (turns out it actually wasnt enough because people said I was lying and in denial) and that my explanation was weird too? Which is whatever I already ended up clarifying that, English is not my first language and I type things with the help of a translator (I wish people could actually keep this in mind. I only type in English because it'll reach a wider audience and it's the language most of my followers know. Often I have to google words people tell me online, or I ask my friends fluent in English to explain things for me)
You can say "that's not what I intended" but that's how it came across... you wrote a lot of nice words while also saying it was understandable that people were ganging up on me over a drawing, it seemed patronizing.
That's why me and others took offense to it, but I think it's difficult to tell tone through text so I don't want to keep nitpicking this any further. If you say you had no ill intent then I believe you.
The following will just be me adding more context and not necessarily aimed at you: Again I understand the lack of context of my account can make people confused about my art, Ive made that clear many times.
The art I made where I said "if your parents didnt love you then it's obvious" was a direct response to people who were mocking me specifically for tagging the art as "non-coupling" because they didnt believe me. They got the context and decided I was trying to hide a fetish because a kiss on the cheek was "obviously shippy". They proceeded to compare this to drawing NSFW of Mob and Reigen by labelling it "non-ship" as if it was comparable to tucking a child into bed, that's what upset me. I did absolutely nothing to these people, I dont know them, if they said this privately I wouldnt care but it was public, and they also targeted another friend of mine for no reason.
All Im gonna say is that my drawing shouldnt have caused this much controversy in the first place. I labeled it "non-coupling" as soon as I posted it, which should've been enough honestly. It's not like I posted porn or anything like that, I got the idea from something Ive experienced in my family as a teenager and I could easily google stock images of the exact same scenario to use as reference, like I really didnt think it was that bad.
Anyways I think I've explained myself many times already. Im not gonna be hostile and say to people "roh t9awed dont ever send me anything else related to this" but just.. check if Ive already answered your question so that it doesnt end up being repetitive. If you have a question about this that I havent answered yet, then feel free to ask.
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ylojgtr · 5 months
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so i am on facebook for two reasons: 1) marketplace, how else will i find the local deals on harmonicas? and 2) the harmonica community, facebook is the only place ive found where the expert players and technicians are active and responsive that's not a 20 year old forum i cannot for the life of me get an account on. and, being on facebook, i am subjected to the stupidest fucking people i swear
ignoring the "i stand with israel" pfps im seeing, the amount of 100% ai accounts saying things like "this boy built this with his own hands, show him love" and showing the most 2021-ass ai hands that have comments of genuinely impressed people saying "wow good job" or, even more depressing, people saying "i doubt he did that with his own hands, his father probably did it and had him pose" like...they're old so ofc they're not going to get it, but shouldn't there be some sort of tagging system for ai posts? shouldn't that fall to meta to protect their users? (obviously i don't expect them to do anything all they want is money but it's still fucked up)
but the thing that made me want to post is the tumblr memes. the shitty, pixelated screenshots of tumblr posts that are taken SO SERIOUSLY, and they have no clue it's from tumblr. i just saw one posted by neil degrasse tyson, the figurehead of using "science" and "reason" to uphold already settled in biases, of that post where someone drew a line from japan to hawaii across the ocean and said "of course pearl harbor was an inside job, planes couldn't have flown that far" or sth like that. and the conversation continued "can't they go around the other way?" "no, the earth is flat. basic science." "i love the logic that planes can't just fly over land" and neil posts it with the caption "sometimes *laughing emoji, laughing emoji, facepalm emoji*" and the responses are all "is humanity going down the drain?" to which everyone says "yes" or "you can't use your inability to comprehend science to debate its fact" or some shit like girl. it's a joke. i scrolled through HUNDREDS of comments and VERY few recognized this (probably because they don't get the most interaction cause they were sorted by "most relevant" but that's still a sign of something). more people were saying shit like "let's not give attention to flat earthers cause it just fuels the fire" IT'S A JOKE THEY TALK ABOUT COMMON SENSE BEING DEAD HOLY FUCK
that was a much longer post than i expected but whatever it was fun to rant
lmao and i just got thinking about the multiple times my family says something like "what do you even do on tumblr i thought it was dead" and then send me these facebook tumblr memes and they're always shocked when i tell them their origins
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sunkingwrites · 1 year
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goooood morning.. 💕 mm I’m so sleepy still- gonna make myself some coffee and then hopefully my stomach doesn’t get upset with the amount of cookies I plan to eat for breakfast 😙
anywaaaays, I’m gonna be cooking a lot today because it’s almost someones birthday and like the good roommate I am I gotta cook their favorite foods~ oh but but I was catching up with bnha before I went to sleep last night (pls I swear I slept when you told me to) but then my roommate came in and.. stole my laptop? I mean I didn’t mind because I was having a mental breakdown over the recent episode,, but now I’m concerned what they did because all they said was “I need le minecraft.” and left 🥲
and I finally finished the firewatch shinkami fic- why tf is it so good??? awhkjhdiuhoina I kept getting distracted noticing the little elements in the writing but it just made it so captivating 😭
oH OH AND- I finally finished what I had left for my college projects and sooo I don’t have anything to do for the next 2 days.. unless *cough* anyone *cough* wants to do me 🥺/j
jokes aside I was crying this morning because I also finished chapter 5 of the song of achilles and we got a background check on one of the characters and I swear I could see the mommy issues shining through 😔
OK NOW IM JUST RANTING OF WHAT IVE BEEN DOING HJQSDKJKWFDKJJNKASD- I can’t get discord to open so that’s why I’m sending an ask tho 🥲
oh oh and my mind just suddenly filled with questions last night and it wont stop bothering me lol I dunno why… they’re so random tho- although I’m very curious on the one reason we know each other: how did you find my blog? It’s just a lingering question that I always wonder when someone follows me hehe- I mean,, I’m very glad you found me because holy shit— 😭 I remember how you were freaking out because I followed you back- that was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life tbh (we’ve been mutuals for well over a month ayo??)
anyways I’m gonna stop my intrusive mind from dumbing more stuff here so I don’t clog up your asks.. I hope you have a great great day, and I will send you kisses and updates of what I cook and uhh shit I do! on discord this time hehe… well unless food pics are not something you like then I’ll just spam you with random shit I do-!
mwah mwah~ ✨
Dude,, IF YOU MADE FOOD FOR MY BIRTHDAY I WOULD FUCKING CRYYY
Ohhhh my godssshfjsmck the fucking shinkami fic,, IT HAD NO RIGHT TO BE THAT GOOD- I WANT TO GET THAT GOOD AT WRITING AJJCNSNNF but like,, I was so fucking close to crying?? MultiPLE TIMES??? AND LIKE ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT WHEN DENKI WAS RUNNING TO THE TOWER,, AND I THINK IT'S SO COOL THEY ADDED ACTUAL BNHA LORE WITH THAT OTHER ASSASSIN HERO LADY AND THAT THEY COULD EXPLAIN DENKI'S LEGS DOING THAT NSKDJSBBFBDB
just-- so fucking good-
Mmmm,, we love mommy issues-- just love love love that for us~ No but like, characters with mommy issues are always too relatable to write aghh- LIKE STOP HAVING MY THOUGHTS PLEASE,, I UNDERSTAND I HAVE TRAUMA JUST LEAVE MEH ALONE
..if you couldn't tell- I had sugar-- remember that boba tea icecream I sent you a photo of in the superstore a while back? Yeah well I bought it today at Walmart and now it's almost gone,, and and I also got an ube icecream too, and Marmo hAtEs it- but I like it and I already knew that I would-- and now I wanna make an ube, vanilla milkshake aahhhh yum yum,, obviously not tonight-- maybe tomorrow if I can???
Okay okay and,, as you know my remember is full of shit so this miGHt be wRoNg- but I'm pretty sure I saw.. mmm I think a writing post first- maybe cuz it aligned with one of my tags?? Then I was like "oooh, I wonder if this person has anything else written for this character-?? Lemme seee~"
so then I would've found your master list post and I liked the vibe of it,, so then I'm pretty sure I just started scrolling through and randomly liking shit-?? I was still like a week new on tumblr so I was desperately looking for people to follow and get some more content flowing through my dash and to interest with--
Thennn, I think it was that composition you had posted that kinda embodied your anxiety that got me hooked,, cuz I kept listening to it on loop- so then I felt like I had to comment about getting it on Spotify,, since my family has a premium plan it's the place I usually get my music,, AND THEN I saw the picrew and I was just gONe cuz I fucking love making picrews and yours looked so cool and you just seemed like you'd be a fun person to talk to.. and then I shared mine with you and just kept talking and uhhh- yeah! That's what's up!! ✨✨
-also also you're birthday on twitter says it's the 28th- so I thought that was funny xD
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feverdream-society · 3 years
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Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
The Attractive Evil Bad Guy Smile(TM)
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Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]
So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.
Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad
Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.
STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.
IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!
The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.
STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.
Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him
So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.
NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT
The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable
Those husky animation models suck lmao
Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!
God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it
Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that
But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????
Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden
This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh
Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)
THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much
Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)
Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens
On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending
Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other
YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).
Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last
Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!
Oh never mind slavery trollmarket
Bruh titanic camelot
I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things
NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH
STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE
WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER
THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN
WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?
Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person
For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues
Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy
Bruh I was grieving
PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference
Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?
NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS
Oh thank God he's okay
NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD
oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))
But I want to see him again
But I'm glad to see vex
Yay they're in arcadia!
But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((
Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)
Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them
Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus
DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE
Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.
BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.
Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.
Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???
And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole
And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!
THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!
BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????
Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭
Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora
HUZZAH
NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????
STAB THAT BITCH JIM
WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED
Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it
SEVEN KIDS?????????
T O B Y ????????????
W A I T NO
N O
IS HE ACTUALLY
OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE
NO THERE ISN'T
F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED
Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS
I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH
W A I T
HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????
HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????
WAIT IS HE
BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON
HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????
BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending
TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all
And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.
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caroldantops · 3 years
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hey! im quite new here and i have seen a lot of talk about readers interactions and i was wondering what is the best way to support my favorite writers (like you) because i think i have been doing this wrong and i really want to support writers who do this<3 ps. sorry if that was confusing, english isnt my first language
not confusing at all babes! you're 100% clear.
also can i just say, i very much appreciate you asking this. i would much rather more people speak up and be like "hey, we dont know the best way to support our favorite writers so how can we?" other than just. Not Knowing and Not Doing Anything.
so, im going to speak from my own personal experience but also what ive seen many of my mutuals/writers i follow talk about. this might get a little long but i wanna answer as thoroughly as i can because people should know!
im putting it under a read more because it got hella long, but please i encourage everyone who reads fics but don't interact to read and consider these things.
fellow writers i encourage you to reblog and add any other commentary you think is helpful!
before anything else (this is absolutely not directed at you, anon, you're perfect), i just want to get this out of the way. never come to a writer's blog and get angry with them for complaining about lack of engagement. like jesus christ. writers are putting hours of work on tumblr for you for free. the least we ask is for comments and reblogs. that's it. if you go and act shitty towards writers who ask for more engagement, yet still follow and wait for the next fic, like what are you even doing bro. just stop.
anyway. now let's get to the actual question!
basically all writers on tumblr will agree, reblogs are vital. and i feel like that gets said a lot but maybe people dont actually understand how impactful it is so lemme give an example.
so let's say hypothetically i have 100 followers. that is 100 potential people who see a fic that i post (i say potential because timezones exist so you might not see it as it's posted)
and let's say one of my followers (Person A) reblogs it, and they have 50 followers. that's 50 more people that can read the fic.
and let's say Person B followers Person A and they also reblog it to their 50 followers.
with only two people reblogging a fic, that's already doubling the number of people who have read the fic.
now imagine Person C followers Person A and reblogs the fic, and Person C has like, 1,000 followers. that's so much more exposure for the writer.
and that's only from two followers of the writer. so imagine if all 100 that read the fic reblogged it? the numbers skyrocket at an exponential rate.
plus, more people reading means that the writer could get more people follow them. so they get a more consistent audience.
likes, on the other hand, do not guarantee this exposure. i would say that most people don't have their likes public on tumblr. and also, even if they do, i know that I'm not about to scroll through people's likes rather than scrolling thru their blogs. likes up the notes, and that's about it. of course i understand liking a fic so you can come back to it later, i do that all the time. but if I've liked a fic, i always reblog it once I've read it.
now, say you're reading hardcore smut that you might not want on your main blog for whatever reason, so that's why you don't reblog a fic. look, i get it. sometimes irl people follow your blog, or sometimes you just don't want people to know what you're getting up to. but that's why i made a sideblog specifically for fics.
this entire blog BEGAN as a way for me to reblog fics i liked. and then it grew and grew and grew into all this. not saying that you have to start writing if you do that of course, but i guarantee, i'd rather see a small sideblog blog with like 3 followers reblog my fic than a blog just like the fic and leave. because that's still 3 more people who will see my fic and possibly read it and reblog it. 3 is better than none.
comments. reblogs are important, but comments are really what keep writers writing. they inspire us with new ideas, help figure out what it is that people enjoy from us, help us improve our writing, and most importantly, they make us feel good. and like writing and posting is worth it.
now, i know that sometimes it can feel awkward reblogging with a comment directly on the post. i even usually don't do that unless it's with a friend. but here are some alternatives/tips!
send an ask or DM! if you're really intimidated, sending an anonymous message is by far the easiest way to bypass that awkwardness.
write in the tags!! i cannot express this enough. comment in the tags. ramble about the fic. just put three tags worth of screaming. literally ANY comments in the tags are my favorite thing. i promise you that writers will scroll thru like basically every tag.
also, if they post it on both tumblr and ao3, don't feel weird about giving a little comment on both! i do that all the time. you can even be like 'hey i read this on tumblr first but wanted to say again how much i enjoyed it' and that is like, heart burstingly nice to hear.
also, if you're having trouble coming up with something to say, my like top commenting tip as both a writer and a reader is point out something specific that you like about the fic. when i comment on a fic (this is moreso when i comment on ao3 bc my comments are always longer there) i try to point out a particular line i like. literally if you just copy and paste it and go 'wow i really really like this line especially' that is the number one way to a writer's heart. seriously. it's the simplest thing, but it makes SUCH an impact.
however, if your comments are only asking for more fics, then that's not a comment, that's a request (which not all writers take).
saying something like 'hey i loved this fic a lot! if you have more in store for this in the future, i'd be really excited to read it!' is a million times better than 'will you do a part 2'. i know they don't sound that different, but i promise you that the tone makes a big difference.
(i honestly have more thoughts about good ways to get over commenting fear/know what exactly to comment that doesn't feel generic, so if people would like me to make another post about it i'd do it.)
and last but not least, if the writer has a way to donate, like a ko-fi, that always is so appreciated. of course, take care of yourself first, but if you have a few bucks and wanna show some support to your faves, that's a great way to help :)
oh! also, if the writer ever reblogs those little ask game things, just send them something! engagement outside of writing is also so much appreciated.
i think that's about everything i can think of! i hope this is helpful and that my explanations weren't confusing (if i need to clarify anything let me know). and again, thank you so much for asking! even doing that shows that you're a reader who cares, and that means the world ❤
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dreamnotnapper · 3 years
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ok, listen. i will gladly hivemind about many things, but one of the things i will never hivemind about is mcc
i am way too invested in that block game tournament to not have my own opinions, and trust me i have a Lot of opinions after sapnaps stream
(this will be very long, feel free to ignore. also, this is all typed up on mobile so i am so sorry)
the most prominent things is when he said he thinks he should be an s-tier, and when he said he thinks cyan is the best team
1. i dont think sapnap is an s-tier. god forbid i post this on twitter where everyone thinks he should be, but genuinely i dont. he is definitely the closest non s tier player to s tier, but i dont think hes s tier yet. i dont have stats on hand (bc im not a Nerd /j), but comparatively, sapnap isnt as good. hes one of the best pvpers and parkour players, yes. but hes pretty weak in build mart, rocket spleef and bingo, and hes decent at ace race and hole in the wall. a question we have to ask ourselves when ranking sapnap, is he at the same level as the other s-tiers? is he as good as pete, quig, fruit, techno, and dream? so far, all current s-tiers have: won at least 1 mcc, had 1st individual at least once and have 3000+ average coins. sapnap has only achieved the first. another thing is that sapnap isnt balance the way an s-tier is balanced. most notably, pete, fruit and quig are all balanced with weaker teams. pete and fruit are commonly teamed with hermits, when not with hermits pete is with b tiers or below, and quig is usually put on for fun teams (techno hasnt played in a canon mcc in a while so i cant rly say how hes balanced nowadays). sapnap isnt balanced this way, he isnt put on weaker teams. if anything, hes put on teams where someone else helps take up a leader role. mcc15, he'll most likely co-lead with dream, mcc14 he had punz, mcc13 he had dave krtzyy, (i dont remember his mcc12 team), mcc11 he had dream, etc.
so sapnap hasn't gotten 1st individual or 3000+ average coins, and scott doesnt balance him the way he balances the other s-tiers therefore i dont think sapnap is an s-tier. however, if he continues improving the way he is now, i believe he will be s-tier eventually. dont say that i'm too hard on him and that my requirements are too harsh because i'm a firm believer that once a player is s-tier, they dont leave (unless they just fuck up that bad, in multiple consecutive mccs)
2. i think sapnaps prediction of cyan being 1st is wrong. first of all, theres a reason why nearly the entire subreddit predicts cyan to be lower on the leaderboard, and its not because the subreddit is biased or playing an elaborate prank. i think both sapnap and dream really overestimate cyans abilities, especially with 2 new players. both dream and sapnap agreed that wisp is cracked, 5up is cracked, antfrost isnt bad, and scott is decent. the stats kind of do tell a different story though. again, i dont have the stats on hand, i only have what i remember from posts ive seen on the subreddit so take what i say here with a grain of salt. i dont think wisp is as cracked as dreamnap think he is. wisp has only played in (iirc, and if the subreddit was correct) 3 events, and his first 2 were very average with his mcc14 performance being the outlier. another thing is that they have two new players. that is not going to be easy. when you look at new players that joined after mcc began getting more competitive, youll see that they always underperform during their debut mcc. take illumina, for example. illumina is one of the best speedrunners in minecraft. he spent hours practicing and studying vods to optimize his performance. iirc, his first mcc he got 17th. that is already impressive, especially for a debut but his next placement was 5th. that is a huge improvement. 5up and antfrost are no illuminas, they dont have the same skill that he does. if illumina couldnt get top 15 during his debut, there is no way 5up and antfrost will during theirs like dream and sapnap predicted they would. the last thing i wanted to say about this is that 5up can practice all he wants on the practice server. he can get himself acquainted with ace race mechanics and the environment of battle box and parkour tag, but the practice server =/= the real event. no amount of time on the practice server can prepare new players to the atmosphere and pressure of the real event
thats my rant over, thank you if you stuck around. also really sorry if you stuck around, i doubt my thoughts were very coherent as its 4:30am. but yeah, i just wanted to get my thoughts out because sapnap and dream discussing mcc predictions made me very frustrated. especially since their predictions were all based on their initial thoughts on the teams and absolutely zero statistical analysis. absolute himbos, the two of them /lh
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cuefog · 4 years
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tog/khunbam fic rec
this is for @cannottranslate​ because you asked for it and i am grateful for the excuse to make a fic rec post
i expect this will be a long post so i’ll put it under read ↓ 
i’ll be leaving my own thoughts and comments under each fic (im sorry in advance for rambling too much)!! if you want the full summary and other info please click on the link provided lol
!!webtoon spoilers beware!!
♡ = one of my favourites
canon timeline
(these will be the ones that are set in the canon world and follow major plot events, even if there some changes in the details and relationships)
♡ deep sea blue by Feyren ♡
please read everything written by feyren!!!! lovely prose, wonderfully written khunbam emotional tension. khun braiding his beautiful hair accompanied by symbolism and perfectly crafted metaphor. bonus earrings.
♡ hollow moons by NoteInABottle ♡
please also read everything by noteinabottle!! equally lovely prose, wonderfully written khunbam emotional tension. khun wearing earrings and giving them to bam, accompanied by lots of symbolism and perfectly crafted metaphor. you could probably consider this a companion fic to feyren’s deep sea blue. both of these fics gave me a Thing for khun’s earrings (>_<;)``
take my hand (take my whole life too) by RadiantAshe
our dear ashe has written lots of great stuff but i think this is my favourite!! so much khunbam softness, very classic s3 vibes <33
Chestnuts at Nighttime by khunfounded (ongoing)
khun with a cat who loves him very much, and vice versa. that’s all the explanation you need. this fic overloads my heart with cute soft fluffy feelings!!! (bonus khun and bam dolls with little hands made of velcro so they can hold each other’s hands (ʘ‿ʘ✿) please i can’t take any more of this, somebody help my heart is gonna explode)
a thousand paths to you by LiannaAila
set during the time of khun’s coma. bam travels to a parallel universe and meets an alive and awake khun. this fic is exactly what it says it is and it’s so lovely <3
oh no he’s hot (and other earth-shattering revelations) by Bird_of_Dreams
tldr; bam being thirsty over khun
khun aguero agnis and his growing competency kink by chuuyaya
tldr; khun being thirsty over bam
motion by smokeandwaves (rated Explicit)
set during hell train, khunbam focused. this one is really popular in the fandom!! it’s well written, and if you consider smut a genre i would say this is the best one in the tog tag. lots of emotions, and a wonderful flow of feeling!! also it has a few sequel fics in the series, ‘obedience’ in particular being all about sub!khun,, which is,, (*ノωノ)
sometimes when i look into your eyes i pretend you're mine by agueros (minamis)
residents of the tower ship jue viole grace and khun aguero agnis and write fanfiction about them (i love these types of fics lmao)
From: Khun by AngrySheepProject  and To you who lies with my heart under the sea by Strawbellie666 (ongoing)
khun messaging bam’s pocket when he thought he was dead in s2
canon divergence + future canonverse
(future fics means it’s set in the future of the current canon, which at the nest arc rn)
♡ A World Without You by Breaking_Formation ♡
this one might be my favourite out of all of them. i know it says major character death but it happens in the beginning and there’s a promised happy ending so don’t worry!!! this one is a beautiful 20k word masterpiece.... seriously..... this fic is set after the nest arc, it has lots of Plot and plays around with the world and the lore of the Tower, so it’s already fascinating that way, but the real heart of the story is in the emotions!! if you love witnessing khun’s endless devotion to bam, this is the fic that shows you that devotion reflected right back at khun. it might bring you to tears :’)
♡ Our Hearts Are Made of Stars by Ruinous ♡ (ongoing)
out of the 5 or so other time travel au fics in the tog fandom, this one is definitely my favourite!! time travel aus are all super fun to read, but this one stood out to me especially because it hits all the right spots!! it’s written well and i love the level of foresight, and the emotions detailed into this, it really feels like the friendships and bonds are at the heart of this story and all the fighting stuff will turn out just fine, and everything will be ok :)
♡ enough by Feyren ♡
future fic, set in a cocktail party on the 87th floor. this is so well written!!!!! again, please just read everything written by feyren. the prose is wonderful and everything going on in this fic feels so well-crafted and carefully executed with just the right amount of subtlety in all the emotions. i think it’s gorgeous.
fire and ice by soundscape (ongoing)
set vaguely in the future. still ongoing, and the story feels like it’s just started, but very intriguing plot!! premise is people trying to separate khun from bam + the team trying to deal with shady fug plots
dig down deep by milkywxy (ongoing)
this one is a plotty one!! diverges from canon at the hidden floor arc. bam decides not to let rachel go with them. im super interested to see where this story goes!!
where the current leaves us by macrauchenia (ongoing)
this one is a Plotty one, still in the early stages of plot development but the premise is super interesting!! basically khun takes bam’s place in the bubble with rachel, during the administrator’s test on the 2nd floor. i’m excited to see where this story goes :D
special mentions for “bam climbs the tower” remix concept fics that you might like to check out (this is for you dango, since you said you like togverse canon divergence :D)
Moonlight by Shadow_to_rant (ongoing, khun meets bam in cave instead of rachel)
Timeless Existence by Jazebeth (Barrattiel) (ongoing, time travel au series)
Second Chance by Shadow_to_rant (ongoing, time travel au)
Never Let You Go by eternus (ongoing, time travel au)
Il Principe by euludey (ongoing, bam with different backstory/origins)
Night Never Falls by TripleTurtles (ongoing, au where rachel doesn’t succeed at pushing bam off the bubble on the 2nd floor)
Child of Arlene by MoodleNoodle (ongoing, bam is adopted by jahad before canon timeline)
au
♡ the king and his lionheart by chuuyaya ♡
khunbam royalty au with bam as king, khun as a genius war strategist. bonus pda in front of a whole courtroom. what more could you want?? this was soooo satisfying to read, i enjoyed it a lot :D (please also check out chuuyaya’s other fics if you like khunbam aus!!)
if there's anything in this life ive been waiting for (its you) by trueaguero (ongoing)
fascinating au where everyone is outside the tower and the tower is part of history. perhaps you could call this a “post-tower au” ?
if my heart was a house by The_Winged_Warrior
very cute magical fantasy au!! khun runs a potion shop and bam is an adventurer
aus are pretty self explanatory so i’ll put the rest in a list:
you are the magic in me by silverinerivers (ongoing, hogwarts au)
hope and legacy by chuuyaya (figure skating au)
♡ jump then fall (i'll catch you) by agueros (minamis) ♡ (figure skating au, consider it a prequel to ‘hope and legacy’, this is a beautiful 13k-word love letter to figure skating <3)
of social media and turtles by chuuyaya (celeb au with social media bits)
i am the last olympian by argenteas (percy jackson au)
who else is there to love but you? by khuns (college au, very soft pining!!)
Lucky coin by bothersomepotato (ongoing, college business majors au)
Greedy Turtles by Alien_ships (ongoing, on the surface it seems like just a pet shop au but there’s a lot of care and attention paid to the characters and relationship dynamics :D)
and i will come to you at every first snow by aguerobaam (khun is a magical doll in a toy store)
the heart heist by paused (ongoing, cyberpunk au)
khun special category
(it’s all about khun here)
♡ all the blue in the world won’t do, without you by NoteInABottle ♡ (ongoing)
multichapter fic set on khun eduan’s 111th floor!! if you’re too impatient to wait for the khun family arc, you should just read this fic. it’s still ongoing as of the time i made this post but it’s already looking to have all the elements i want out of a khun family arc. it’s written so so well too!! noteinabottle is one of my favourite tog authors :D
Brothers and sisters, I'm an atomic bomb by gleek_runner (ongoing series)
a wonderfully well written series of fics focusing on interactions between members of the khun family!!!! im just a sucker for the khun kids and im always starving for khun family content
He Wonders if He Still Breathes by Chocolatesandblood
khun and ran interactions!!
putting his resolve to the test. by soundscape
khun and hachuling interactions!!
Autumn Angel by XprincessxofxspadesX
khunbam meets maria and a series of complicated and fascinating interactions occurs. this was very nice to read ;w;
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@lyhoradka​ tagged me in that post about five bits of text from written media that are burned into your brain and, kindly, gave me a theme of places. i am going to annotate this because i am a bitch
1. holy places are dark places. the wisdom that we get in them is not thin and clear like water but thick and dark like blood. - cs lewis, till we have faces
im almost certain ive misremembered this one but its better this way. clive what the devil fuck were you trying to say with till we have faces. burn it down and start over with this. i have a sidenote about hope faith and love but thats beyond the scope of this discussion
2. night falls. the workers put down their tools and point to the sky. “there is the blueprint,” they say.  invisible cities, italo calvino
again idr if its sky or stars. this is the description of thecla from invisible cities, kindly appointed to me by my good friend venus. this is not the strongest one but it is a strong one and its for Me and i remember it. inna thought i was going to make this whole post about haunted houses and this one is completely the opposite; i’ll consider it aspirational
3. walk to the east till you can walk no more. swim east until you pass the sunrise; swim east until you pass the stars; swim east until you come to the edge of the sky. there you will find yourself on the shores of a different land. even in that place, they shall know your name, and mine. - adel, kc danine/unlikely flowerings, jenna moran
sorry i cheated on this one bc i looked up the attribution and found my memory was wrong. but i cut it up to match what i thought. this one is actually a combo with
3a. the sea will be the color night behind glass. then, slowly, it becomes green: first rain-wet slate, then darkest jade. green as fresh emeralds. green as remembered rivers - the sun beneath the sea, sunless seas
again ive hashed the first part of that but green as remembered rivers lives in my head rent free. these two live under the heading “an exile in the uttermost east”
4. THIS IS NOT A PLACE OF HONOR. NO HIGHLY VALUED DEED IS REMEMBERED HERE. NOTHING OF VALUE IS STORED HERE. 
the warning continues of course but the basis is here. the idea that we cannot produce something so horrifying and terrifying that it does not also fascinate us, as you might guess, fascinates me. nightmare and obsession are such close brothers
5. a woman drew her hair out tight/and fiddled in the violet light/and upside down in air were towers/tolling reminiscent bells that kept the hours/and voices singing out of empty cisterns and exhausted wells.
in my head sean bean reads these lines in his civ vi voice. why did so much weird fiction pattern weird bits of worldbuilding after this bit. not that i am immune. voices singing out of empty cisterns and exhauuusted wells
BONUS CONTENT
so many things i wanted to add that werent written or that i didnt have memorized perfectly enough
1i. the, like, entire first half of to tundra by los camp, which i will reproduce below
meet me at st nicholas among the oaks behind the church that sway like pigtailed girls as summer wind whistles around your bare-shin knees and the forsythia leaves in the shade lay with me tickled by the feather reeds thats where the trees grow old under the ivys hold as you in my two arms equally safe from harm and in a hazy daydream our bodies married the stream and we broke down into pebbles and silt the water ran from the fields until the oceans we filled and found the seabed the comfiest quilt
there was more life in the weeds than in the few hundred seats that rose from transept to chancel to nave [...]
2i. prim leaves her father’s house. i won’t reproduce the whole story here but there’s a girl prim and her father is the god hansa and they live in a house of iron nails and one day her dad is killed and she has to go bury him and takes nothing but his corpse and a single iron nail. and she traipses all across creation and the void looking for somewhere to bury him but every time she tries his corpse shouts at her for being shit at it. and eventually she collapses, and drops the nail and it springs right up into the same exact house, and she imagines crawling in there with her fathers corpse to die next to him and freaks out and then
A pale face came before her and she was abruptly struck from her despair as though by a great hammer. A beautiful stranger had appeared, mild and tall, of milky flesh, spare in figure, but radiant in voice and visage. "I know you," said the stranger in a small voice, "you are Prim."
"I was Hansa's orphan, the slave, Prim," croaked Prim in response, "and now I am nobody, just a small dirty thing in great emptiness and here I will die."
"No," said the stranger, and the clarity and firmness of her voice and smile send a shock through Prim, "you are Prim, and Prim only, and Prim you shall be." And Prim there realized her tears had made a great pool and she was greeting her own reflection. And she fell into that murky pool and straight away it turned clear as crystal and Prim vomited forth a great black knot from very deep within her, and her body was scoured and lashed by the icy waters of that pool, and great draughts of poisonous filth and despondency were drawn in rushing gasps from her wounds, and her skin was sealed and her soiled trappings were purged and the caked illness and death was ripped away and she rose from that pool fresh and humming. Her back straightened and she scarcely thought on her father's corpse or the faintest echo of that iron house.  That is how Prim left her father's house.
so basically abaddon scooped all of tsiy and every other haunted house writer in like five thousand words
3i. berenike
From my words you will have reached the conclusion that the real Berenice is a temporal succession of different cities, alternately just and unjust. But what I wanted to warn you about is something else: all the future Berenices are already present in this instant, wrapped one within the other, confined, crammed, inextricable.
4i. a ghost does not come to stand in the dark doorway of your room because it is an 18th century orphan girl named annie. a ghost comes to stand in the doorway of your room because the doorway is where things come to stand. - i am in eskew, david ward
the formats all fucked up now huh. this has influenced my thoughts on both psychogeo and necromancy. what a fucking guy. theres also the pope lick bridge one but
5i. i hope you will forgive me for including a bit from tsiy
I opened my eyes. I was kneeling at the base of a tree, at the top of a grassy hill, under starry night. Dad was standing a little ways back, head craned back to look at the tree. "What is this place to you?" he asked, looking around. The island came to an abrupt stop at the edges; it wasn't a floating island in space or anything, there just.....wasn't anything beyond the edge of it. Like looking past the edge of your own eyesight -- not the blackness of eyelids, but the colorless place beyond.
"I'll die here someday," I said, and meant it.
i really need to work on getting places and haunted places into the new draft. im slacking. but im also not allowed to go back and change anything rn or ill just never get anywhere
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My Cup of Tea: Prologue
My Cup Of Tea: Prologue | YoongixReader
Warnings for this Chapter: none, just a post-breakup suffering OC who is saved by a whole Min Yoongi
“Coffee is bitter, so people add a little bit of sugar or creamer until it suits their taste. However, once it’s added it can’t be separated. It’s also addictive, it’s your choice to keep it as your poison or to control how much you take. Some people need it, some people don’t...In that case, it really isn’t their cup of tea.”
A/N: im finally deciding to post this after who knows how long sajkdfhd,, tysm for beta reading this for me @jtrbluv !!! again u were a huge help because the tag game you tagged me in gave me the final push to actually post this fic thats been collecting dust in my drafts. ily boo !!! <3 it also took a while because i wanted to do more research for this fic. i dont think ive read about or drank so much tea in my life for the past few months. pls enjoy the prologue everyone!
Word Count: 1,600+
You sat in the worn out leather booth, eyes trained on the steaming mug in front of you.
What just happened?
Something that took five years to grow ended in mere seconds.
Five years of dedication.
Five years of convincing yourself it would work out, that it could be fixed.
Five years spent on a relationship that should’ve ended before it began.
You mindlessly took a sip of your coffee hissing as the hot brew burnt your tongue, mind drifting back to the argument that occurred hours ago...
“You’re never here!”
“Was I not enough for you?”
“Where’s the old Y/N that I knew and loved?”
You weren’t sure about what was said after that except for... “I’m seeing someone else.”
The bruising pain on your tongue began to throb and you couldn’t help the tears that formed.
You never liked coffee, but the café was your favorite place. 
Perhaps it was the enticing aroma that attracted you every time you walked in, or maybe it was the cleverly thought out name that was in the form of childlike puns: Bearly Awake Brew.
Either way, you couldn’t despise coffee any more than you already did in this moment.
“Are you alright?”
You whipped your head up to see a man standing above you.
Through your bleary eyes you could make out a set of kind brown ones shielded by black frames which rested atop a boopable nose. On his head, a black mop of neatly trimmed hair along with soft cheeks paired with a soft jawline.
The man was dressed in a black turtle-neck and long-coat as if returning from a meeting discussing the newest stocks and bonds of business.
After a small, possibly noticeable, ogling of the stranger, you shook your head ‘no.’
He motioned to the seat across from you raising his brows inquisitively, “May I?” 
This time you slowly nodded.
He seemed harmless enough, and even if he tried anything there was pepper spray in your purse.
You sniffled as he took a seat.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No y-you wouldn’t understand.” He leaned forward onto his elbows—a determined furrow in his brow.        
“Try me.”
Who was this guy? He didn’t come off as threatening but somewhat… familiar.
You couldn’t quite place his face or remember his name.
“Not yet, right now I just need a good cry,” you replied sinking further into your seat.
“Alright.” He said, shrugging and not saying much, or really, nothing.
He sat across from you— not making eye contact but quietly observing the café.
Several questions raised in your mind: Where did he come from? Why is he here of all places? Did someone send him with the intention to make you feel even more like a fool than you already did?
“Don’t you have anything better to do?” you asked when the silence became a little too long.
“No, not really...” he replied slowly. “Would you like me to leave?”
“No, I mean, it’s just-“ you hesitated, “You’re fine,”
“Ok then.”
Silence.
One look at him and it’d be hard to believe women find him approachable, but the man came up to you.
Much less, while you were on the verge of outright bawling in the middle of a café.
“What’s your name?” you asked, initiating conversation. You might as well since he was there.
“Yoongi. Yours?” You hesitated knowing it wasn’t fair to not give him your name.
“I’ll reassure you I’m not a stalker, at least not the bad kind.”
You let out an amused scoff, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He chuckles and you couldn’t help but enjoy the sound.
Were you really that joy deprived?
“Ok then, I’m Min Yoongi, and I’m a stocker. As in I distribute and track merchandise in stores.” he reaches a hand out to shake and you can’t help but stare at it.
“Well go on I won’t bite,” you huffed a laugh, taking his hand and shaking it.
He smiles and you can’t help but return it.
Who is this guy?
“Why don’t we go for a walk?”
You contemplate his offer.
You had just met him but you hadn’t had casual conversation in a while… or hung out with friends for that matter. So maybe it’d be good for you after-
“Sure let’s go,” You replied immediately while standing up, maybe a little too quickly— your chair scratching the wooden floors and making a startling sound as you headed to the door.
He raised his brows in surprise at the sudden burst of energy before trailing behind you, ignoring the stares of café patrons.
“Hey wait up!”
-
This was another reason why you visited the quaint coffee shop often.
The park outside was always bustling with life and energy.
There was a little pond where ducks would glide across its surface diving from time to time, scavenging for the weeds at the bottom, maybe even getting sustenance from people who were ignorant of the ‘Do not feed the ducks’ sign.
It also had an open field where locals and families would enjoy the hot summer days by setting up little camps with blankets and food or even play small games of football or soccer.
While children played in the vast expanse of green, parents would sit back and converse with strangers forming new friendships. It was a place of change and growth and you loved it.
“So,” Yoongi continued as you both walked down the dirt path, “other than your name, and why you were crying in my café, is there anything about you I have yet to know?” Your cheeks flushed red as you shifted your sight to the ground.
“There’s nothing much really,” you replied with a shrug before backtracking his sentence, “Wait, your café?”
“Don’t change the subject. There’s got to be one thing about you… how about your favorite color?”
You purse your lips at the dodging of the question, albeit a basic one, but it was a start. “I guess Rainbow,”
He nodded with a hum, “Wise choice,”
You let out a huff of amusement, “Alright wise guy, what’s yours?”
He pondered for a moment before affirmatively replying, “Black,”
You hummed. “Kind of... dark, isn’t it?”
He turned around and shrugged, “I’d say the rainbow but you took it already,”
You scoffed, resuming your place beside him.
He continued asking basic questions to which you replied and vice versa.
You liked dogs, but him on the other hand didn’t have a favorite animal, at least until he adopted a poodle which made him keen on the creatures, more specifically one named Holly.
You were allergic to bees and he was allergic to cats.
You both enjoyed a variation of music from rap to classical piano music, but the question also led to a debate on what artist is the most superior to all.
Neither of you won, and concluded neither lost with valid points made during said argument.
It only felt like minutes had gone by but wasn’t until you looked at the time that you realized how late it was.
The crowd at the park had begun to thin out while shops surrounding the area were beginning to close for the day.
The once bright sunlight began to fade behind clouds as it began its descent to the horizon.
“I should probably be heading home,” you cut in politely before he could delve into the topic of what they would do in a post-apocalyptic world.
“Oh,” he replied, obviously disappointed.
He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “Well could I ask you one more thing?”
You nodded expecting it to be another ‘get to know you’ question or something along the lines of ‘if you had to would cut your arm or leg off?’ but it was something much more complicated.
“Can I get your number?”
You stiffened, unsure how to respond.
You weren’t sure if he was asking as a friend or a man with an ulterior motive.
Could you really do it?
Especially after you had just-
“I’m sorry that came out wrong,” He quickly mended, fumbling his words, realizing your distress.
“I think you’re really great, and I’d like us to continue talking. Just two people who enjoy each other’s company, you know?”
You looked up at him and saw he was offering to be friends that would be nothing more.
You couldn’t deny: you had fun.
For the first time in a long time.
Maybe it wasn’t a relationship you needed, but a friendship.
You smiled, “I’d like that,”
You reached into your pocket pulling out your phone, “Here.”
You both swapped devices, putting in the respective numbers. Once the contact was added, you returned each device to the rightful owner.
He grinned, holding up his phone, “How about a contact photo?” 
You smiled, nodding as you  stood beside him while  he took a selfie of you side-by-side. Once the picture was taken he slid his phone into his pocket. “Thanks,” he glanced down at the phone, that darn smile growing on his face, “Y/N. I’ll talk to you soon?” 
You nodded and finally split ways.
As you began the trek toward your apartment a dopey smile remained plastered on your face.
Maybe everything would be alright.
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iamtheprotagoneil · 4 years
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@cutekitten6 okay let’s do this (reading through your tags on my posts is my one of my favorite things to do since i made this blog btw. you’re so precious. i appreciate you a lot, dude!)
#bruh the pure romance of their name meanings man #nolan really out here playing us lmaooo #but yo yeah neil introducing himself to protag with his real name #goes against what we saw established with clemence posey's character having strict division boundaries #to keep their identities hidden #even ives and wheeler could be pseudonyms because they are professionals who know the dangers #but neil? #neil just wants for his beloved to know his real name #when he sees him again #because you know when older protag sees young neil #neil def would flirt with him and not think twice about giving him his real name #regardless of whether he searched for tenet or was brought in #neil is just a sappy love bug like that wow #iamtheprotagoneil (via)
i think when it comes to neil, the protagonist was always willing to bend the rules a little. he would allow neil to use his real name - middle name or whatever you hc it as, really - because in his head, he couldn’t really think of neil with any other name (like us, really). he must have spent days, weeks, months even, obsessing over this one guy that showed up to save his life, then ultimately died for him. he called him neil so much in his own head as he went through the mission again, that he just couldn’t imagine calling neil as anything else. so he’d allow neil to use his real name, because the protagonist relied on it just as much.
and, god, neil would definitely flirt, but i don’t think he genuinely meant it – or at least, he didn’t mean it at first. he started out as just a way to get close to the protagonist. he put on this charming persona, always smiling with an alluring gleam in his eyes that he knew people wouldn’t be able to resist. he insisted on using his real name because he wanted to build a foundation of trust between him, wanted the protagonist to let him in – in ways that neil knew he wouldn’t with other agents, or people in general – so neil could finally figure him out.
and the protagonist allowed him all of it, easily. sure, he wouldn’t have access to any classified information, but the protagonist still trusted him with much more than he did any regular tenet agent. neil still held some doubts, but the closer they got, said doubts began to wade and wane. it was something in the way the protagonist’s said neil’s name – with warm, with familiarity, with a certain sort of affection that neil was beginning to catch for himself.
so yeah, neil flirted, at first, with hidden intention, but as it went on, it became less about getting a clue into the protagonist, and more about getting the protagonist all for himself.
#hmmmmm yeah #im actually now thinking about this #and what if its sorta both #what if neil is his middle name #and he usually goes by his first name but changed it to his middle because #1. job security in tenet is top priority #but also #2. the first time protag sees neil again and neil is shiny and new #he calls him neil (either as a 'do i know you" shtick) #(which makes neil think hes flirting with him) #(or in a breathy realisation that neil just so happened to hear and turned around being like yeH?) #and neil just decided that yup neil is what I'll go by now (via)
okay, listen....... what if, neil was the name the protagonist gave to him? what if, after neil recovered from his test – dying in some way for a mission, refusing to give up any information pertaining it and his teammates, just like the protagonist once did – the protagonist met with neil, and just casually, unthinkingly, called him neil.
neil would pause, looking at him strangely because the protagonist must have known his name already, must have read it on the files they had on neil. he didn’t voice his question, but the protagonist still saw it in his expression, in the confusion passing through his gaze.
“that’s your name, from now on,” the protagonist explained, in addition with what priya had once told him, that they needed the secrecy to protect not just themselves but also the mission they would go on. then, he added, a bit for forlorn, “if you don’t like it, you can pick another one.”
he said it, and there was nothing in his expression or his voice that betrayed his words, but somehow, neil could still hear the hesitant, the way the protagonist didn’t actually mean it – was hoping against it. neil watched him for a moment, trying to gauge more than what could very well be a delusion on his own parts, before shaking his head.
“no,” he said, titling his head a little, considering, “neil’s fine, i think.”
the protagonist didn’t exactly exhale in relief, but the relief passing was unmistakable. neil smiled, didn’t mention it, only thinking about how the road ahead of him would be so interesting.
(there’s just no shortage of ways we could go about this. n*lan handed us a giant sandbox that we can mess with as we please lmao)
#HAHAHAHAHA #i wanted to point this out in the fic you wrote out of my kat jealousy ask #because you wrote that neil left his older protag two weeks before he died #and i was like HMMMM THAT DOESNT SEEM RIGHT BUT ILL TAKE IT (via)
lkfjsdlkfjsdlkfj BRO THE SHAME. that was a giant bruh moment for me, goddamn. honestly competely forgot about that science mumbo-jumbo, only focused on protagoneil ripsdlfkjslkdjfsldkfj i’mma go back and fix that part of the fic later, right now that screenplay really needs a good reading 🙈
#bruh for some reason this gives me doctor who/river song vibes #not like i didnt have those vibes the moment the movie ended for me the first time lmao (via)
yeah, my friend chris directed me to river song/the doctor because i don’t watch doctor who and all i got to say is 😭😭😭😭😭😭
#BRUH I MADE A PROTAGONEIL COLLAB PLAYLIST A WHILE AGO #PLEASE ADD THIS TO IT IF YOURR INTERESRED HMU BECAUSE YO (via)
bro where can i find this playlist? i’ve been looking for some good songs that would fit these two for a while now. only that song by labrinth truly hits all the points for me.
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shhhhyoursister · 4 years
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Hi this is @autisticmatteo about your tags on my post... I would LOVE that i love every piece of autistic matteo media to heart. Im so glad people share my hc
hi wow thank you for sending this im going to do my best!!!! this is the first time in a while ive felt nervous posting something but i hope you all like it ahAHhahAhAHh (also i hope its okay that i posted this and wrote a whole fic for it rn whoopsie)
Matteo was in the kitchen, standing in front of the stove, when he felt it start up again. There was some kind of itch building up in his fingers, and he started hitting a beat on the counter with his free hand, tapping out the rhythm to the line of the song that had been looping in his brain all day. It helped a little bit, and when he felt the same itch in one of his feet, he started tapping along to the same beat. 
He was trying to be quiet about it because David was sitting at the table working on his film, and he had the small frown on his face that meant he was getting frustrated. Matteo being loud and annoying for no reason definitely wouldn’t help with that, so when he heard David huff and mutter something under his breath, he stopped completely.
The feeling came back immediately, almost worse, and Matteo started bouncing on his toes. If he didn’t need to focus on the food he was cooking he would’ve started pacing around, maybe grab something to squeeze or fidget with, and if David wasn’t there with a deepening frown on his face, he would’ve done way  more.
He knew that David didn’t care about him stimming, encouraged it even, and had seen him stim in many different ways many times before. He still felt a little awkward about it, though. He knew that it looked strange sometimes, and he always felt bad when he and David were out somewhere and he started flicking his fingers or rocking. He didn’t like the feeling when people would stare at him, and figured David didn’t love the extra attention either.
It was awful trying to ignore it, though. When he was holding back a stim it almost felt like he was holding his breath (he had said that to David once, who had smirked and said, “Yeah, you’ve never been the best at that.”) It was a very similar feeling, the way the need would grow and build until you couldn’t ignore it anymore, and the longer you tried to hold it after that, the worse it would get. 
He turned his head away from the food for a second so he could see David, who was still sitting at the table, looking like he hadn’t moved at all. The only difference was the way his eyebrows were drawing down a little, and he was mouthing something to himself as he shook his head at his computer screen. Matteo took a breath and figured that if David wasn’t looking at him, he probably wouldn’t get annoyed if Matteo started stimming more.
He let his arm drop to his side as he rocked up onto his toes, and his fingers started twitching and fluttering, and after a few seconds of that his hand started flapping a little. He checked behind him again and saw that David was still focused on his computer, so he brought his hand up to his chest and started flapping it more, letting his fingers drag along the fabric of his sweater. 
He felt his body calming, and he let out a sigh as the tension drained. He started bouncing again and checked the pasta, and when he saw that it still needed more time, he let out an annoyed sound. He snapped his mouth shut quick to stop the urge to make the sound again, and again, and again, and made a little noise in the back of his throat.
“You okay?”
Matteo’s body froze except for his head, which whipped around to see David staring at him, a small, tired smile on his face.
“Yeah, sorry, just...” he knew that David would understand, so he said, “just needed to stim. I can stop if it’s annoying you.”
David looked almost upset at his response, and quickly said, “No, baby, you don’t need to stop.”
“But I can if you need me to.”
“Matteo,” David started, getting out of the chair so he could walk up to him and place his hands on Matteo’s waist, “I promise it’s not annoying. It’s something you need to do, and you’ve told me that it feels good, so why would I want you to stop?”
Matteo smiled a little, and he grabbed at David’s biceps and started squeezing and loosening his hands. He looked down at his feet that were still tapping, and looked back up and said, “I just don’t want to distract you.”
“I promise, stimming is not the thing about you that distracts me.” David said with a smirk, and he leaned in to nose at Matteo’s cheek as it turned pink. Matteo turned his head and caught David’s lips in a quick kiss, both of them giggling into it, and when they pulled away he dropped his head onto David’s shoulder and rubbed his face into the material of his sweater.
“I really need to get back to editing so I can finish before the urge to throw my laptop out the window becomes too tempting to ignore. Do whatever you have to do, okay?” David kissed Matteo’s head and pulled away, squeezing his hips one more time before settling into his seat again. Matteo wanted to follow him and climb into his lap, but he knew that David needed to work, and he needed to make sure their food didn’t burn.
He turned back to the stove, bouncing on his toes again. It still felt a little weird but David had said it wouldn’t distract him, and the itch was starting to get to be too much for Matteo to ignore anymore. He started flicking the fingers on his free hand, and shook his head out a few times, and then flicked the hair out of his eyes. After a few minutes he was flapping his hands again, alternating which hand he was stirring with, but he could feel something else starting to work its way out, and before he could stop himself he let out a moderately loud noise.
He couldn’t even really explain what the noise was, but he made it again quickly  a few times before stopping himself. He bit his lip and turned his head again, and was surprised to see David already staring at him, a gentle smile on his face.
“It’s okay, Matteo.”
Matteo smiled gratefully at him before turning back to stir the sauce, and he clicked his tongue. He did it again, and again, and when David didn’t say anything and kept editing, he didn’t stop. The noises alternated between a few different ones, and Matteo turned to look at David anytime a new one started up. David never reacted, only looking up to smile at Matteo if he noticed him staring. The fact that David was still able to focus on his work blew Matteo’s mind.
Just as he was pouring the sauce into the pot with the pasta, humming the same line that he had been tapping earlier over and over again, his fingers flicking gently at his side, bouncing on his toes, he heard David get up. He smiled, waiting for what he knew was inevitably going to happen, and he chuckled when he felt David’s arms wrap around his waist, and he stopped bouncing.
“Shit, sorry,” David said, backing up again, leaving his hands on Matteo’s hips, “I didn’t mean to stop you.”
Matteo rolled his eyes and spun around, and grabbed David’s arms and yanked them until he was walking forward, and wrapping them around Matteo’s waist again.
“You didn’t stop me, idiot, I stopped so you could hug me,” Matteo said, sliding a hand into David’s hair so he could feel the soft strands sliding through his fingers, “that’s better than stimming.”
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