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msbellucci · 4 years

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i never wanted to befriend this bitch. the moment i stop talking to her, i get all of these texts saying my mans cheating on me and shit..and that my man talks shit about me..and just dumbass texts saying some dumbass shit. bitch its so obvious that its you sending me this shit....okay so this bitch is married to this armenian dude...and he happens to be related to one of my mans closest homies..so they met years ago. 3 years ago i met my mans homies cousin, and his wife. shes latina, so her and i would speak in spanish and she was whatever..she would talk about some way out shit and i would never really believe the shit she would say. because it was always so far fetched way out shit. five mins into my first conversation with her, shes telling me how she was a stripper cuz she had to provide for her son and herself..that she came here alone to this country. its crazy shes been here for like almost 20 years but doesnt have her papers. i know its a dificult process, and it reqiures a lot of money, but yeah..anyways it was a bit weird. she would always brag about having all these businesses. and she would tell me how she was on TV, and how she was a model..and im like girl...like she isnt tht pretty, not to be fucked up but she aint...shes shorter than me..and im 5'5"...models have to be hella tall, skinny, and beautiful..she would brag about how she was hella skinny and it was just weird af how every time her and i would run into one another, she would only talk about how she used to be a model, this tht and the 3rd.. and how she was on TV.. and in my head, im like bitch..you be tellin me the same exact shit everytime i fkn see your ass..like wtf??? do you feel that insecure around me that you gotta tell me some bullshit about you being a fake ass model everytime yu see me? really? -__- please bitch. shut ur dumb asss up. ive always disliked her and her man...her man is on drugs being a psycho causing problems for me. 3 years ago when my man and i were stayin in a hotel, we came out to our car in the morning and he had taken all the air out of our tires and scratched up our car. i was so pissed, i ran up on his wife to fuck her up but my man grabbed me. cuz shes a cop calling ass bitch. so yeah i never trusted those motherfuckers and my man kept giving her husband 2nd chances. and i would get into it with my man over it because i didny fkn like them...i dont forgive easily and i dont give out second chances easily..my mans different he does have a big heart but now he doesnt give a fuck about those ppl and he cut them off and we changed our numbers and im so fucking happy. that pathological ass lying hoe lies on me and my man and its disgusting and weird as fuck to watch cuz we aint never did nothing to this bitch and her family. if anything weve helped them. my man and i went out shopping one night and my man told the bitch, get anything you want...a normal ass girl, like me..would turn the offer down. i would say no thank you i appreciate it but i dont need anything, this bitch started grabbing shit and putting it in the cart and i was disgusted yo..im lowkey glad she did it cuz it shows her true colors. a hoe ass prostitute bitch.. thats what a prostitute does, lets some other dude buy shit for her..i know my man did it out of the kindness of his heart cuz he likes her husband and her kids so we just did it to be nice cuz we know they broke as shit. they couldnt afford their fkn business they rented out no more..theyve been telling us for a week they cant afford it and they gotta leave the spot...so we said, maybe we will pay the rent and open up our own business llike a smoke shop or some shit. my man and i called up our business partners to come down and look at the spot, and they loved it. when they went down, this hoe and her man started to get all fkn territorial sayng "oh this is our business we arent gonna leave it,,blahblahblah" like they flip the script so fkn quick and it was lame af on their end. they looked stupid as fuck. so i blocked the bitch..and my man stopped talking to her husband. we dont kick it with no fake flip flopping ass hoes. anyways. a couple nights before this happened, this dumb hoe asks me and my man "do you really think my husband loves me?" bitch if u gotta ask other ppl if ur own man loves you...then youre not confident in ur relationship, or with urself..and he probably doesnt love you...when she had asked that..i didnt really know how to answer her. my man said "well hes cheated on you...youve caught him in the bathroom of a casino gettin his dick licked on, you caught him in a hotel with 3 naked bitches...when you love someone, you don't cheat on them." thats what my man had told her..and then two nights later..the shit with the business went down..i started to get messages from a weird number saying "oh ur man cheats on u he goes to hotels with hookers and talk shit about you.." HAAHHAHA nice try hoe but my man is always with me...shes so fkn jealous because my man and i have an honest relationship, we are loyal to one another and idk why she cares so much and shes gonna text me dumbass shit..i got more texts from another number, saying simaliar shit, but this time the person texting me was speaking so highly of tht hoe ass bitch saying "oh you should talk to her she is so perfect and has a good character." like bitch you legit just burned urself out...its YOU sending me this dumbass shit..i changed my number..because im done. the 2nd batch of messages i got, my man run upstairs to their apartment and started to kick their door, telling them to open the fuck up..my man almost grabbed her husband by the throat..because theyre just tryna get between me and my man and thats so fkn dumb to be honest..its ridiculous how much of a low life this bitch is...

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albapuella · 4 years

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Urges

AO3

Fandom: Homestuck Summary: When Dave finally gives into his urges, what will Karkat do?

Tags: Meteorstuck, Retcon Timeline, davekat, pov switches galore, present tense CW: CW: hand holding, hugging, nose kisses Author’s Note: This is a fic that I wrote in about two hours for the davekat thirst federation server after they were all being Caliborn thirsty on the main. Please note the content tags--if you're up (heh) for all this spiciness, read on. I thought result was worth sharing with the masses. Enjoy!

Dave is walking beside Karkat, glancing out of the corner of his eye at Karkat's dangling hand, the lax fingers calling out to be--

No. No, he couldn't. He shouldn’t. And yet... He tilts his head ever so slightly to see Karkat's hand better. The curve of the fingers. The tips of his yellowed claws. The thick, meaty curve of his gray palm. What would it feel like to--

Dave feels his face go hot.

"ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?"

"oh yea of course dude but youre still wrong about dane cook"

Karkat rolls his eyes but accepts the answer before launching into another diatribe Dave can't be bothered to listen to when Karkat's hand is dangling so invitingly by his side.

He can't. He shouldn't.

Before he can stop himself, he reaches out for Karkat's hand, the warmth of it beneath his fingers even more wonderful than he'd thought it be. His fingers wrap around Karkat's stiff startled ones; their palms meet.

---

Karkat is walking beside Dave, going into detail about the superiority of the comic stylings of Dane Cook, when he feels another hand grabbing his own. It's so sudden, he hardly knows how to react even as he feels fingers intertwining with his own.

He stops walking. His throat is dry and he swallows hard before turning his head. There's only one person who can be holding his hand, but it's impossible. Dave's not interested in him. Not like *that*.

But he turns and looks. Pale fingers interlaced with his own gray, leading up to an arm clad in red God Tier pajamas. A shoulder connected to a neck. A neck to a face.

At least Dave has the decency to be blushing, too. He doesn't have the decency to actually look in Karkat's direction. Instead, he squeezes Karkat's hand.

"DAVE?"

Dave is silent. Then he turns his head, the smallest hint of a smile curving his thin lips. "sup"

---

Karkat says his name, and it's not a rejection. It's not a rejection, but it's a question. Karkat's face is flushed but confused. He isn't trying to pull his hand free, but he isn't returning the gesture.

Dave is worried now, worried he's pushed too far too quickly. He has to do something. He smiles, trying to ignore the nervous flutters in his chest. "sup"

Karkat scowls. "WHY-WHY ARE YOU HOLDING MY HAND, DIPSHIT?" The stutter tells Dave he's as affected as Dave is, and despite the harshness of the words, he still allows his hand to remain in Dave's grasp.

Dave feels a swell of hope. "it was asking to be held dude i dont make the rules" He shouldn't. He's done too much already. But Karkat's so close now, his yellow and gray eyes wide. Dave can see himself reflected in his dark pupils.

Feeling reckless, Dave uses his free hand to lift up his glasses so he can see Karkat in full light. His eyes are even more beautiful without the dingy, gray haze.

---

Dave pushes his stupid douche shades up, leaving them up in his blonde hair. Karkat isn't certain what is more incredible: that Dave is still still holding his hand or that Dave has willingly, of his own accord, allowed Karkat to see his eyes.

Karkat has seen them before, of course. He's caught glimpses of them from the corner of Dave's shades. Seen flashes of them when they've been knocked askew. But he's never been given the opportunity to really look at them. Certainly, Dave's never let him look.

He's so lost in the moment, he's speaking before he can censor himself. "THEY'RE BEAUTIFUL."

Dave ducks his head, his flush traveling down his neck. He holds Karkat's hand a little tighter. "thank you" he says in an awkward way that tells Karkat Dave doesn't get many compliments. "im gonna get crazy here so hear me out" He takes a deep breath. "can i... can i--" He's turned his body to face Karkat's head on. "i wanna hug you can that happen"

For once in his life, Karkat takes initiative. Before Dave is even quite done speaking, he's closed the space between them, wrapping his free arm around Dave's middle.

Dave makes a startled sound but recovers quickly, and almost too quickly, Dave's arm is wrapped around Karkat's middle, too. Their entwined hands loosen and separate, allowing those arms to join the hug as well.

Karkat smells soap and a hint of sweat. And it's warm, so warm. The only hugs Karkat had ever had, had ever endured, had been cold. He'd never hugged Aradia, but he knows that even her embrace would have been cool. But Dave is warm.

He sighs against the other boy's shoulder, relaxing further into Dave's arms. He feels breath on his cheek; it smells like coffee.

This can't last forever, Karkat knows this. He knows that this experiment of Dave's will end, but he can enjoy it while it lasts.

---

For what feels like the longest time, Dave can only marvel at the fact that Karkat is in his arms. The troll boy is hugging him, pressing against him, as relaxed as Dave has ever seen him be. Dave feels a rush of pride that Karkat trusts him enough for this. He feels a rush of shame that he waited so long to ask for this.

He tightens his hold on Karkat as though that will keep this moment from ending.

His face is close, so close to Karkat's.

Dave has never been good at knowing when to quit. He's never known when to be satisfied. He brings his face that much closer to Karkat's, brings his nose closer to the gray nose.

They touch. Dave moves his head and gently rubs his nose against Karkat's.

---

Karkat doesn't react at first. He's mostly confused about what the fuck Dave is up to. As far as he can tell, Dave is rubbing his nose with his own nose. It's not unpleasant, just unfamiliar. It feels... it feels intimate.

He closes his eyes, wishing Dave would stop, wishing that he wouldn't. What is Dave getting out of this? Is Karkat just convenient or--

There is no or. Dave wanted to do this with someone, and Karkat is someone. That's it. He ducks his head away from Dave's, burying it into his shoulder.

"WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS WITH ME?"

Dave stills. Then he says, "i want to man thought i was making that pretty obvious" He chuckles, his chin pressing into Karkat's own shoulder. "karkat youre pretty baller you know"

He'd never thought Dave would be so good at acting.

---

Dave isn't expecting it when Karkat pushes away from him with a rough shove. "karkat--?"

Karkat's mouth is twisted into a vicious snarl even as his eyes fill with ruddy tears. "FUCK YOU, DAVE." He wipes the tears away with trembling fists. "IF YOU'RE GOING TO USE ME, AT LEAST DO ME THE FUCKING COURTESY OF NOT LYING TO MY FACE ABOUT IT."

"what" Dave is utterly lost.

"DON'T 'what' ME, ASSHOLE." He crosses his arms, the anger on his face crumbling into a hurt that stabs Dave in the gut. "I ONLY HAVE A PASSING UNDERSTANDING OF WHAT 'BALLER' MEANS, BUT I KNOW YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED IN ME. SO, DO ME A FAVOR, AND STOP PRETENDING YOU ARE."

Dave has spent enough time with Karkat to tell when he's about to bolt, and Dave can't let him go until he clears this up. He grabs Karkat's hand again. "dude karkat listen to me im not lying" To his relief, Karkat doesn't pull his hand away. To his worry, Karkat folds in on himself, his head bowing and his shoulders slumping.

"I'M PAN ADDLED ENOUGH TO LET YOU TAKE WHAT YOU WANT," Karkat says, sounding defeated. "JUST DON'T PRETEND YOU ACTUALLY LIKE ME. I DON'T THINK IT'S TOO MUCH TO ASK."

---

Karkat can't look at Dave now, too embarrassed, too desperate. He should have just kept his mouth shut for once. Should have just enjoyed what little scraps Dave was willing to throw him. Dave is still holding his hand.

"i want you to listen to me" Dave is saying, his voice soft. His other hand strokes the top of Karkat's knuckles as he speaks. "im not using you thats hella gross and id be all kinds of insulted that youd think that but i dont want to make this about me when its about you" Karkat hears him take a deep breath. "im gonna lay it on the line ok i like like you a lot."

"YOU LIKE LIKE ME?" Karkat hates himself for the hope in his voice. He's not entirely certain what "like like"ing means, but he's gathered it's more than being hate-friends. Yes, he and Dave have been getting along better, but he knows Dave only tolerates him because they're both lonely. That's all.

"yea like we're peak middle school up in here passing notes to each other," Dave is clearly gearing up for a ramble, and Karkat smiles despite himself, "do you like me or like like me but weve got to keep it on the downlow so the teacher doesnt notice and find our note because our reps will never survive if she reads it to the class and she will because thats how teachers roll"

"I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND THE CLUSTERFUCK YOU HUMANS CALL AN EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM," Karkat says and, for a moment, it's like nothing's changed. Then reality falls in again. "YOU MEAN THAT?" He is such an idiot. Such a fucking idiot.

---

The way Karkat asks Dave if he means what he says is almost enough to break him. If he weren't such a stone cold bad-ass, he's certain he'd be bawling now, too. Even so, he wishes he could put his shades back down without Karkat thinking he's hiding his eyes so he can lie better.

"yea dog i mean it i dont lie about important shit."

Karkat has always been an open book, emotions-wise. It'd probably be more helpful if Dave were better at emotions himself, but he can see that Karkat wants to believe him. It's something. "we dont gotta do anything different if you dont want im chill just hanging with you," he says, hoping against hope it doesn't come to that: he wants to hug Karkat again, and he hopes the troll boy will let him. "but i want to... i want to hug you because youre you youre like special ok"

A disbelieving huff. "YOU THINK I'M SPECIAL."

Dave nods. "karkat vantas is totally one of a kind" Well, that just isn't true, is it? "i mean there are a fuck ton of you out there in the dream bubbles but i meant more like metaphorically in that this version of you is the you im interested in hugging and stuff"

---

Karkat almost can't believe how charmed he is by this idiot. Almost. Maybe Dave is lying, but maybe Karkat isn't being fair. The more he thinks about it, the more he thinks maybe that's true. Considering what he was accusing Dave of wanting to do, he's fairly floored that the human boy still wants anything to do with him.

He looks down at his hand still held between both of Dave's. Then he looks up at Dave's face, at his still uncovered eyes, and makes a decision. "OKAY."

Dave blinks. "ok" The corner of his mouth quirks upwards. "ok"

Karkat rolls his eyes. "YES, THAT'S WHAT I SAID. I'M GLAD THAT YOUR AURAL CLOTS ARE STILL FULLY FUNCTIONAL."

"you have got the weirdest names for things you know that just say ears its so much shorter"

Before he can come up with a suitably scathing remark, he's being hugged again.

Oh.

He sighs and returns the hug. He could get used to this. He thinks he already is.

FIN

End Note: Sorry. I could not add in the kissing--it was just too lewd.

#homestuck #fan fic #davekat #my fic

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fortissimohands-archive · 4 years

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ok im gonna turn into a bojack horseman blog real quick because the last few episodes came out and I have Thoughts

this is kinda rambly but whatevs, you gotta get the infodump out

-it’s … a LOT harder for me to empathise with BoJack after the real Sarah Lynn story came out. I sort of assumed that his guilt over it was just because he took her on the bender (and was also a dick when she was a child) but the revelation that he waited 17 minutes to do anything, when he could have saved her, is just ... bad. especially since it was never mentioned before now which makes it seem like a retcon

-also, people are gonna try to argue with the above point by saying he was also drunk/high at the time, but I don’t think he was? I know they were on a bender together but we dont know how drunk/high he was as of the hotel/planetarium scene. im underage and ive never drunk alcohol or taken a drug stronger than ibuprofen so i might be wrong here, but I feel like someone whos sober enough to plan out how to avoid getting in trouble for that (right down to the detail of calling himself on her phone) is sober enough to not wait 17 fucking minutes to get someone medical attention

-Im lowkey upset about the lack of closure with hollyhock? we never even find out for sure if Pete told her that it was BoJack who gave maddy alcohol poisoning, theres a few comments that imply she does but her complaints about him not giving her space are perfectly valid by themselves and she doesn't really seem to be angry until after the interview comes out so who knows

-personally, based on how Pete hesitates at the end of A Quick One, While He’s Away, I feel like he doesn’t tell her, probably because he sees how much they look alike and guesses she might be related to him, BUT shes very suspicious that its him because lets face it that's exactly the sort of thing he would do, which is why she wants to keep her distance in the next episode

-I have mixed feelings on her letter never being shown? on one hand it feels kinda cheap that we never see it even though its arguably the main turning point that pushes him over the edge, but on the other hand I think its best this way because theres nothing she could write that wouldn't feel underwhelming after all the build up. sort of like how I lowkey hoped for a reveal of what Erica looks like, but I also knew that nothing they could animate would really be able to match all the jokes

-also, random weird theory: when he calls hollyhock after reading the letter, it says the line is disconnected. except it sounds like hollyhock saying that? and her voicemail message up until then is “leave a message … if you’re a hundred”, so it’s pretty clear that she doesn't get voicemails often, and its not a stretch to assume bojack is the only person who would call her (her friends and dads would probably text). conclusion: her line isn’t disconnected, she just changed her voicemail to get him to stop trying to call her

-the fact that Judah's band is called “SPECTRUM of enchantment” confirms he is autistic and no I do not take constructive critisicm

-I fucking loved the reprise of Don’t Stop Dancing, which is my fave song from the series by far, but I wish it was longer and reprised all the verses from gina’s version.

-it was kinda weird that butterscotch was secretariat? they managed to pull it off pretty well but still, its weird how its never explained. I guess its because neither of them were developed as much as the other characters so having them both would have meant having two characters with only a few lines, but both were needed for the plot (butterscotch for the revelation that he maybe did care about bojack and Beatrice,secretariat for the poem)

-honestly I LOVED The View From Halfway Down. both the poem and the episode as a whole

-also. my finale predictions were basically this: it wont end with bojacks suicide, because weve spent 6 seasons following this guy and if he dies itll all be for nothing, but theres way too much drowning symbolism for it to not pay off in some way. so my best guess was a failed suicide attempt by drowning. so yay i was right!

-anyone else seeing symbolism with Hollywoob? like yeah, its a nice conclusion to both the Hollywoo gag and the recurring gag of mr peanutbutters shitty sign company, but the original reason the D was stolen was for Diane, back when Diane/Mr PB/BoJack was an actual love triangle. and I feel like the fact that it got replaced represents her choosing neither of them, but the fact that it’s a B instead of a D represents that shes changed a lot since then?

-alternatively: looking at it from mr peanutbutters perspective, the D was for Diane, back when they were married. the years of Hollywoo represented their shitty marriage and divorce (we know diane hates big gestures, so their relationship was doomed starting from when the D was stolen). and the B is for BoJack, since mr PB is one of the only characters who hasn’t at least implied that he wants to keep his distance from bojack

-im so glad we get to actually see how the voicemail affected diane. as well as address the fact that, intentionally or not, hes been making it her job to “save” him and that's not fair to her

-honestly im a big fan of the theory that BJ does die and episode 16 isn't real. I know its less of a theory and more of a fandom retcon because the ending came across as rushed and too open-ended (because honestly it kinda did), but the fact that the first shot is the last shot makes the theory feel really fitting

-my take on that theory is that the last 2 episodes are bojack’s hell? sort of like a Good Place-esque hell where you’re trapped in an infinite cycle of things being awful, but just not bad enough for you to realise you’re in hell. my guess is that first he goes through the hell of the dinner party (which he mentions is a recurring dream), but eventually he gets used to it so he moves on to the showcase, after which he ends up in a never-ending cycle of “waking up”, going to prison, going to the wedding, talking to diane, and starting over

-especially since when diane is persuading him to tell the truth about sarah lynn, one of the points she makes is that if he stops lying, he won’t have to constantly feel like he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. so now hes stuck eternally being scared of what will happen once hes out of prison, which will never happen because it resets on the roof. he’s made his bed, now it’s time for him to lie in it. forever.

#bojack horseman #suicide tw #drugs tw #alcohol tw #overdose tw #death tw #drowning tw #ask if you need anything else tagged

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mithranqueersmusings · 4 years

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Before This Dance Is Through V

Chapter: 5/16

Rating: M (Smut Warning)

Summary: Ringo's being going through a dry spell for the last year or so and when he regretfully tells his best friend John, he insists on taking them to an all-male strip club for some "fun". Ringo isn't sure whether it's the alcohol, his desperation or a mixture of the two but he thinks he might be falling in love with a stripper.

Tags: AU - Strippers, Modern Setting, Smut, Slow Burn

Pairings: George Harrison/Ringo Starr, John Lennon/Paul McCartney

AO3 link here / Fic masterlist here

Despite what John had suggested, Ringo didn't go back to The Helter Skelter the following week; he'd considered it when John sent him yet another late night text but ultimately decided it wasn't the best idea. Spike had been playing on his mind daily and Ringo wasn't sure he was prepared to face him again. Instead he focused on his drumming and searched for a few more students to teach, which were fairly easy to find. Usually Ringo enjoyed his time off, he understood he was lucky that he didn't have to work a 9-5 job just to get by, but recently he wanted his fill his time up as much as possible, to distract himself.

One of his new students seemed incredibly interested in him, they'd spent an hour just chatting in his living room before they'd even moved over to the drum kit. Ringo wasn't too fussed, he was getting paid by the hour so wasting time was beneficial to him but he didn't want to give the guy the wrong impression. He was a little bit older and attractive enough but Ringo simply wasn't interested.

"Why didn't you just go for it?" John had asked him when they next met up.

"I dunno..." Ringo mumbled, but a part of him knew very well.

He'd given the guy another lesson since then and it became clear that the guy's interest in him wasn't going away any time soon. Ringo felt bad about the whole thing, wasn't he just doing exactly what Spike was doing to him? He tried to act as professional as possible the second time around in attempt to get the guy to back off, considering he hadn't heard from him since he was hoping it had worked. What was wrong with him? Was he really going to make himself suffer like this all because of one guy? And not just any guy, a stripper who had shown absolutely no interest in him at all. It was ridiculous, he kept telling himself, but no matter how much he tried to convince himself that he had to get over Spike, he would still think about him every day without fail. Trying to distract himself with clients had been working somewhat, but it had been difficult, especially when his best friend was John Lennon.

youre gonna love me

The text came through when Ringo was sat in a café getting some lunch. He'd finished with one of his younger students, a sweet girl who's parents had tried to convince her to try a more 'ladylike' instrument but she had promised only to give up the drums if she was awful; much to her delight, and Ringo's for being able to prove the stereotypical parents wrong, she was pretty good. Seeing her always put Ringo in a good mood, the parents mostly stayed away partly due to the noise but mostly due to disappointment, which meant they could joke around together. Ringo could tell she admired him and he welcomed it gladly, one of the best things about teaching was inspiring others, at least for him it was.

do i not already?

well yes but youre gonna love me EVEN more

what have you done

well i happened to stop by the club last night

oh god what did you do

wow is that how little you trust me

can you blame me

suppose not ANYWAY i got talking to paulie

surprise surprise

do you want the good news or not???

fine fine sorry

AS I WAS SAYING i was talking to paulie and he told me that your special little someone has an onlyfans account

first of all fuck you for calling him that second of all wtf is onlyfans

oh sorry i didnt realise you werent living in the 21st century

...... care to grace me with your knowledge?

basically its a website where you can post exclusive stuff for ONLY FANS to see its not a porn site or anything but its basically where people sell their nudes MEANING spike has an account so you can totally see loads of raunchy filthy perverted pics of him

but i have to pay?

well weve all gotta make a living

i can basically see him naked for free

but this way you wont get all freaked out and embarrassed well you will but nobody will know at least so do you want the link or not???

Ringo paused for a few moments, he was gripping his phone tightly in both of his hands as he unblinkingly looked at John's words. If his mind was going to decide to make him suffer by enabling his intense interest in Spike, he may as well get something out of it.

fine

where are your manners richard??

can i please have the link to the strippers nude photos please john please

alright calm down let me know if its worth while i might have a look

idk if im even gonna look at it paying for porn is a little dated

treat yourself ringo id offer to pay but im broke

if youre broke why were you at the strip club last night?

well SOMEONE had to go

they really didnt

im supporting my local economy

i dont think thats how that works

sure it is anyway here you go

Ringo stared at the link for a while, his eyes even began to blur, he didn't want to risk opening it in public even though he knew there was little chance of anyone seeing. He finished his lunch in a hurry and headed home quickly, only when he was in the privacy of his bedroom did he dare open it. First he had to make an account, when he saw the screen loading up asking for an email address and password he just turned his screen off and put the phone down. This was far too much effort for something he shouldn't really have been doing in the first place. But it only took a few minutes for him to pick the phone back up and begin signing up, he used an old email as it felt less seedy that way and he didn't want to risk his name cropping up anywhere for Spike to see. Now he could load up the link properly and take a proper look at Spike's profile.

Just looking at the small profile picture was enough to startle Ringo a little, the dark eyes looking into the camera with that unreadable glimmer behind them. He was shirtless in the picture, Ringo wondered why that didn't catch his attention first, with the frame cutting off just before it showed anything too explicit. The header was a photo taken from the club, showing him in tight, leather pants and tassels on his nipples which matched the whip he held in his hand. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. He'd spent so much time and effort trying not to think about this man, attempting to keep him out of his mind as much as possible. Ringo knew that if he went through with this all that progress would be lost, he'd be giving in to whatever strange obsession he'd developed for Spike, one that no doubt wasn't going to lead to anything good.

Ringo kept staring at the screen as though it was going to tell him what he should do. Spike's profile had no description, which wasn't very surprising, and it dashed any hope Ringo had of discovering something new about him. Right before he was about to put his phone down again, it vibrated.

howd the wank go??

john i dont care how long weve been friends asking how my wank was will always be weird

youre right sorry so how did it go???

if you must know i havent had a wank i havent even paid for entry

now whos the one being inappropriate??

ha ha

why havent you???

feels weird

oh i see youll consume a bunch of unethical porn for free but god forbid you actually give sex workers any actual money

you are the last person who can lecture me about unethical porn

hey now watch yourself ringo if you dont get a subscription I WILL

go ahead

and ill tell you every day what sexy sexy pictures hes posting ill tell you EVERY SINGLE TIME i have a wank over them

every time? i dont think youve got enough data for that

im not joking

neither am i you wank A LOT

ringooooo just buy it i swear to god if its not worth it or you regret it or whatever ill give you the money back

on top of the money you already owe me?

have you always been such a capitalist

youre not doing a very good job of convincing me

fine spikes cock now are you convinced???

maybe

naked pictures of spike whenever and wherever you want them all for the low low price of 10 quid a month convinced??

fine fine if itll shut you up

im starting to think thats code for 'i really wanna do this but im too embarrassed to admit it'

i hate you

now that DEFINITELY code for 'john youre right' anyway theres no time to be telling me how right i am all the time youve got dick pics to look at even i wont stand in the way of a good wank so dont bother replying to me until youve paid for that subscription young man

im older than you

DONT BOTHER REPLYING

Ringo let out a sigh and rested his head against the bedroom wall from where he was laying on the bed. He opened up the link again and his thumb hovered over the subscription button, why couldn't he just do it? The money wasn't an issue, it could've cost half as much or be double the price and he'd still be debating it all the same. Somehow it felt like an invasion of privacy, after all Spike hadn't told Ringo about it himself, but then again that didn't necessarily mean he didn't want Ringo to see it. After all it was like John said: everyone has to make a living somehow. Sometimes Ringo wished he could turn off that part of his brain that was so empathetic, so concerned about how everyone felt and what they were thinking. He knew that he wanted this, so why wasn't he allowing himself to have it? Ringo could see that he was being ridiculous, as he was with almost anything involving Spike, and after lying there for a while pondering and debating he decided to flip a coin. Heads would mean he got the subscription, tails that he didn't. He watched the coin spinning through the air after he flicked it upwards, then snatched it and slammed it down onto his forearm before slowly moving his hand away: it was tails. What a relief. Ringo chuckled to himself for being so foolish, settling down into his bed; it was still only around midday but he didn't have anywhere he needed to be.

So why didn't he feel relieved in the slightest?

This whole thing was getting tiring, the constant debate between what he believed he should do and what he wanted to do, and it seemed like it wasn't going to be ending anytime soon. Apparently he was in this for the long run, whatever that meant, but if he was going to turn down relatively attractive guys practically throwing themselves at him, he may as well go all the way. While he was putting in his credit card information, he stopped to think around three of four times, but once he'd finished and the images became accessible to him, his brain was barely able to conjure up a coherent sentence.

"Jesus..." Ringo breathed out as his eyes flicked across the plethora of pictures loading up on his screen.

There was a lot of them, and a lot of Spike was on display. Most of them were pictures taken at the club, either from a professional photographer in the audience or photos he'd taken himself in the mirrors backstage - Ringo could even see glimpses of Paul in the background of some of them. The ones that caught Ringo's eyes the most were those that seemed to be taken in his house, these also happened to be the ones in which Spike tended to be fully naked. It was very different experience to see him like this: a static image that he'd intentionally taken of himself and posted for so many people to see, an image that couldn't look back at Ringo and make him feel that strange mixture of excitement and shame. He began scrolling down the feed which only revealed more and more enticing photos. Ringo began to feel himself hardening, he suspected it had been happening for a while now but he'd been far too distracted to notice. He felt like a teenager discovering porn for the first time, it was difficult to remind himself that this wasn't anything new. Seeing Spike naked shouldn't have excited him so much, and yet it did.

One picture in particular drew Ringo's attention: Spike was stood in front of a bathroom mirror with a loose black tie lying against his bare chest, one hand was holding a phone and the other gripping his cock. He had dark eye make up on and his hair was messy. Ringo wasn't sure exactly what it was about this photo that was so enticing but he couldn't take his eyes off it. The prominence of his collarbones, the faint curls of his dark hair, how his slim fingers wrapped around himself. Slowly Ringo slid his own hand under the waistband of his boxers as he stared at the picture. At first he hesitated, his fingers stopped right above the base. It's not like this would've been the first time he'd touched himself while thinking about Spike, it would've been far from the last he imagined, but this was different. It was more concrete, more of an admission. Nothing felt quite as real when it's only being imagined, the haziness of lust fuzzing up the mind as it so often did, but now with a very real photo of Spike in front of him - which he'd paid to see - the feeling was far more tangible, far harder to ignore.

He'd come this far, he told himself as his hand sunk lower until his fingers were running along the length of his semi-hard cock, he may as well go all the way. To begin with Ringo stayed looking at this single picture as he slowly pumped himself, but as his lust began to grow he perused through more and more pictures: Spike kneeling naked in front of a mirror with a loose cigarette hanging from his lips, lying in the bath with bubbles only just about covering his nakedness, spread out on the bed with a gag in his mouth, handcuffs forcing his slim arms behind his back with his cock throbbing. None of this was anything Ringo hadn't seen before, like most people in this day and age he'd searched through the darker corners of the internet - sometimes willingly, sometimes John was to blame - but to see Spike in such a way was like an entirely new rush. Each picture drove Ringo further and further on, at times he almost dropped his phone with how sloppy his movements were becoming. Who took these photos? Ringo figured it was best not to think about it, the possibility that Spike had a boyfriend who took all these pictures of him would've been the quickest way to kill his erection.

Ringo began moaning and cursing wantonly as he got closer and closer to his orgasm, he had to stop flicking through the pictures because he could hardly concentrate on what his other hand was doing, so he settled on a final one to help him finish; it wasn't particularly strategic but he was definitely grateful that he selected the one that he did. In it Spike was looking directly into the camera, allowing Ringo to gaze longingly into the rich brown of his eyes and how his dark lashes curled beautifully around them. He was shirtless with nothing but a necklace on, the same necklace that Ringo had seen him wearing in the record store and Ringo couldn't help feeling a sense of satisfaction that he'd seen it with his own eyes, as though it meant something. Deep down he knew that it didn't but his inebriated mind was latching onto it. The nudity in the photo was hardly interesting Ringo by this point, although it would be wrong to say that he completely ignored the flatness of his stomach or the faint shadows of his ribs beneath his pale skin, it was the personal aspect which truly affected him.

This wasn't just lust. Lust Ringo could understand, he could compartmentalise it and give into it without much shame or a second thought. If this was just lust, he would've bought the subscription without a care and touched himself looking at the nakedness of Spike's body as though it meant nothing more than a way to get off. Yet here he was on the brink of orgasm looking into another man's eyes, eyes that felt like they were looking straight back at him as though they were sharing this moment together. It wasn't hard to imagine Spike's hand in place of his own, those deep eyes watching Ringo come undone piece by piece. Ringo's hip began to stutter, his leg twitching a little as he had to drop the phone down onto his lap as his head fell back against his pillow as his orgasm approached. It wasn't the image of Spike's naked body that filled Ringo's mind as he came, it wasn't his arse or his cock or even his chest, it was his face, his voice, it was him.

Ringo lay breathless on his bed for a while, the clarity that arrived as his orgasm subsided wasn't welcome in the slightest and he was reluctant to pick his phone back up to see Spike's eyes looking at him once again. There was no use in feeling ashamed about it, no point in trying to deny it any longer: his feelings for Spike were more than a mere passing fancy, that was clear. Exactly what he was meant to do about these feelings was far from clear but that wasn't something Ringo could figure out right now with cum on his stomach and the daylight seeping through his bedroom curtains.

When he'd picked up his phone he'd closed all the apps immediately, doing his best not to catch a glimpse of what he'd been so eagerly looking at before. Just as he was about to step into the shower to clean himself off, his phone buzzed; he almost couldn't hear it over the music he was blasting out. It alerted him for a moment as though it was going to be a message from Spike stating he knew exactly what Ringo had just done - it wouldn't have really surprised him had that been the case, Spike's face almost always looked like he knew something that nobody else did - but fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, it was John.

sooo how did the wank go

who knows but on a totally unrelated note im about to get into the shower

well before you do that i have even more good news

can it not wait?

NO because you might cum just at the thought of it and then youd be wasting a good shower

well arent you considerate and unnecessarily graphic

thats me anyway im taking you to the club next tuesday whether you like it or not

im still waiting for the good news

well if youd let me FINISH next week theyre doing a special event and we just have to go youll never guess what it is

what is it?

guess

you just said ill never guess

youre no fun

WHAT IS IT

alright alright keep your hair on its a crossdressing event high heels make up probably a few wigs all that good stuff

im still waiting for the good news

OH COME ON youre telling me you dont want to see spike in heels and fishnets with some lovely lipstick on

Ringo gulped. It wasn't a difficult image to conjure up his mind, considering he'd been staring at photos of Spike for the past twenty minutes and it excited him to say the least. He did want to see that, very much indeed.

#the beatles #beatles #beatles fanfic #the beatles fanfic #beatles fanfiction #george harrison/ringo starr #ringo starr/george harrison #ringo starrxgeorge harrison #george harrisonxringo starr #starrison

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ecsta-zi · 4 years

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Open Letter To My Childhood Bestfriend.

Let’s be honest: weve grown apart over the years. I moved all the way to NYC to never be seen or heard of again and you went and started a family after you graduated highschool. When we were kids this is the life we wanted for ourselves. For me, I always knew I wasn’t going to stick around. I always knew that I would be in NYC or in some other state and I was right. Just like you knew you were going to be a mother. I remember how you use to talk about babies, and when your niece was born you always talked about her. When we were at the age where we were started to explore our sexualities and sex in general you started on BC right away. Somewhere in between obtaining the things we wanted in our lives we experienced life altering trauma that paved the way for where we are now. You still struggle spiritually and mentally from your last relationship and I still struggle spiritually and mentally from my childhood. Now we got what we wanted and were still struggling with our happiness. Whether it be the stress from the daily grind or from reflecting on our past you and I have always been the type of people to feel unsettled. Sometimes its simply wanting more for ourselves and others in our lives. We do nothing but strive to be more and do more. I can say that I am proud of the strong woman you have become. Let’s get to the point of this. As you know I did not have a “loving” family. Today, it feels as though I didn’t have one at all. It has always been the way that it is for as long as I can remember. It destroyed almost every aspect of my life and you were there to see how it took me apart piece by piece as the months and years went by. It took getting out of that environment, moving away from home at a young age, growing up, and a few years of therapy to finally rationalize why certain things happened the way that they happened. One thing that I have trouble getting over is the fact that I was a huge nuisance to everyone around me. When I think about those days all I can hear is the one word that everyone used to describe me: annoying. The hyper activity, the inability to control my impulsive behavior and language, the dumb things I did for attention, lying about who I am to everyone around me out of fear that no one would like me for who I am and other various obnoxious things I have said and done. It DESTROYED my social life and didn’t allow me to grow life long bonds with anyone. No one wanted to be my “friend”. You were there though. Yes, we were caught in some love triangle but I looked forward to going to your house everyday after school. It was a refreshing break from the chaos at home and the structure at school. It was always one extreme or the other but you were always the grey area I never wanted to leave. I loved you then as I do now not just for being a shoulder that I can lean on or an ear to talk into, but for being my person. You’re one of the very few people on earth that truly understands me and loved me for who I am. It meant a lot coming from a home and a school that showed me the complete opposite. Now things are complicated after the years we talked on and off. I can tell that you are still afraid of being open with me and I guess in some ways I am too. I always want to talk to you but you don’t have the time and I understand. It just makes me wish I can turn back time and take advantage of those times where we did have all the time in the world and be grateful for that. I am still grateful that you’re here with me now and that’s all that matters. Thank You for being my person.

#gratitude #love #childhood #myperson #open letter

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imaginedisish · 5 years

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Take On Me (Otis Milburn x Reader) (Sex Education)

A/N: THIS TOOK SO LONG TO WRITE OMG. OKAY UMMMM THANK YOU FOR 300 FOLLOWERS. I KINDA CRIED BECAUSE YOU’RE ALL SO AMAZING. ANYWAY...here’s some smut :) hehehehe! This was SUPER requested. The title is based on the Aha song of the same name. My friends tell me I look like the girl who dances to this song in that vine...so if you ever wanna know what I look like, I kinda look like her??? ANYWAY... I hope you alllll enjoy :) Thank you for all the love and support <3 xxxxx (oh and Colin Ritman smut is up next LOL BYE)

Summary: You and Otis decide that it’s time to take things to the next step in your relationship....for the first time...SMUT!

Warnings: SMUT. SMUT. SMUT. language...fluff...yeppers.

Word Count: 2,124

Also...I made a part two that I’ll link here!

You walk down the road, your hand in his, giggling, talking about anything and everything that comes to your mind. Your yellow sundress sways in the wind, a smile plastered across your face.

“I mean you’re lying if you say you wouldn’t kill to go back to 1979 and see Joy Division live!” Otis says, his ocean eyes glowing in the moonlight. You stare into them, drowning wave after wave.

“Well sure, but what about Lou and Bowie?” You say back, arching a brow in Otis’s direction. He nods, agreeing. “You rather see Joy Division, don’t you?” You ask, laughing a bit. You knew when Otis was holding something back from you. You could see it in his eyes, or simply in the way he held himself. He gets fidgety and restless.

“O-okay w-well m-maybe. Yes. I’d rather see Joy Division,” Otis says finally, an apologetic smile spreading across his face.

He was too cute to even care that he disagreed with you. “Oh well,” You say, pausing, throwing your hands up in surrender. “I guess I just have better taste than you.” You giggle loudly.

“Guess I’ll just have to accept that my girlfriend is far cooler than I ever will be,” Otis says back, throwing his hands up to meet yours, grabbing them softly. He plants a kiss on your forehead, and you hum with pleasure. It was little moments like these that made your heart sing, no matter how innocent or small.

You two continuing walking, your hand still in his. Otis had been your boyfriend for about two months, but you and he had been friends for much longer. Everything seemed so perfect, except for one thing.

Sex.

It wasn’t necessarily taboo in your relationship, you and Otis had talked about it before, but, you were a virgin, and so was he. Obviously, there was no problem with that. But you had both gotten to the point where you genuinely wanted each other. Otis was over his intimacy issues, thanks to you, and you felt like you were ready to take your relationship to the next step.

You see Otis’s house up a head, the massive, red, Queen Anne style home still vibrant in the dark of night. A few lights are still on inside the house, but it was likely that Otis’s mother had gone to bed. It was late. Stars hang carefully in the night sky, dancing over a round, full moon. The trees sway in the crisp summer wind. Otis stops for a second, taking both your hands in his.

“Do you want to, m-maybe, c-come inside?” Otis asks nervously, biting his lip. You can’t help but smile.

“Yeah, yeah I’d like that,” You say, pulling him along the path as you walk forward. He stumbles a bit, tripping over his own feet as he catches up with you. Eventually you two approach the front door.

Otis puts a finger to his lips, cautioning you to be quiet. You nod your head in response. Otis slowly opens the door, trying to make as little noise as possible. The door creeks loudly, and Otis’s turquoise eyes fling open widely, filling with anxiety. You let out a small giggle, covering your mouth immediately after, trying to suppress your laughter. Normally, sneaking around was “sexy”, but not with Otis. He was so adorable, so cute.

“Now that’s not fair. My sneaking skills are quite good, ya know,” Otis whispers, a smirk plastered on his face. You smile, shaking your head in disbelief. Then, Otis grabs your hand, pulling you swiftly into the dimly light house. He shuts the door behind you, and guides you up the stairs and into his room.

You somehow successfully reach Otis’s room without banging into anything, or worse, waking his mother up. He closes the door to his room, and slides the brass lock into place.

Your eyes gloss over his room. His bed sat in the center of the attic like space, the walls covered in different band posters. You spot a giant Joy Division poster next to his bed, and a The Stranglers poster right next to that.

On the other side of the room was a bookcase, holding Otis’s extensive collection of records and books. You walk over to the case, scanning to see which records he had. Not to your surprise, the boy had everything from Arcade Fire, to Arctic Monkeys, to the Beatles, to Nirvana.

The room screamed Otis. It was a perfect personification of his personality, and you loved it.

Otis smiles at you softly, grabbing your hand again, and walking you over to the bed. He sits down on the edge of the twin mattress, and you sit down next to him. Otis looks deeply into your eyes, his aquamarine gaze filling your stomach with excitement. Your heart flutters in your chest.

“I know that we’ve been talking a lot about…” Otis trails off. He swallows harshly, his Adam’s apple bopping in his throat. “W-well about sex. If you don’t feel comfortable with this I completely unders-,”

You cut him off before he can finish his sentence. “I want this, Otis. I really do.”

“A-are you sure?” He asks, arching a brow.

“Yes, I’m positive.”

Without any hesitation, Otis’s hands come up to cup your cheeks, and he pulls you into a hungry kiss. His tongue brushes against your top lip, asking for permission to enter. You part your lips slightly, as his tongue dances across your teeth, intertwining with your tongue every now and then. You pull apart for a second, trying to catch your breath.

Otis breathes deeply as his hand brushes against your inner thigh, his eyes refusing to leave yours. You melt under his touch. He slowly moves higher, searching your eyes for permission. You nod your head eagerly in response.

His hand then makes its way closer to you core, and you whimper in anticipation. Otis slowly pushes your flowing yellow dress up.

“I know I already asked but I just want to-,”

You cut him off again. “Otis, I want you.” He nods, pushing your dress up farther. His hand slides up your thigh again, reaching towards your heat. His thumb begins to brush against your clit over your panties, getting faster each second.

A muffled moan escapes your lips. Otis smirks, and stops. You send a disapproving frown in his direction, but to your delight, Otis slowly begins to pull at the hem of your panties. He takes his time as he gets down on the floor, and slips them off your legs.

You decide it’s time to turn the tables a bit. Your hand reaches across Otis’s thigh as he sits back up on the bed. You begin to palm him through his jeans.

“F-fuck,” Otis groans loudly. You quickly put a single finger up to his lips, signaling for him to be quiet. His mother is most likely just down the hall, you think to yourself.

Otis nods, and you continue to palm his shaft through his blue jeans, his erection growing. You slowly unzip his pants, undo his belt and pull down his jeans. You reach down to continue palming him, but he grabs your hand before you can do anything else.

“No. My turn to make you feel good,” Otis says, pushing you down on the bed. You’re shocked at Otis’s sudden confidence, but pleased nonetheless. He pulls your yellow sundress over your head, revealing your lacy bra underneath.

“My god you're gorgeous.” Heat rises to your cheeks.

Otis’s hand travels across your chest, down your stomach, finally resting on your heat. He begins to play with your clit again, circling the spot slowly with his thumb.

“O-otis,” You call out, your eyes falling shut, a fire beginning to burn in the pit of your stomach.

“Do you like that?” Otis asks, rubbing faster now. You open your eyes, nodding your head up and down eagerly.

“Y-yes,” You mutter. You had touched yourself before, but this felt so much different. It felt amazing. Suddenly, you feel Otis’s finger slide over your wet opening. He looks to you for permission once again. “Y-yes please.” He does as you say, sliding a finger into your opening.

“Tell me what feels good, and what doesn’t,” Otis says, his eyes wide with concern.

“H-holy shit,” You cry out, pleasure washing over you. Otis shushes you politely, a smirk stretching across his face. “Th-this f-feels r-really g-good.”

The feeling of Otis’s finger filling you up, and his thumb toying with your clit begins to become overwhelming. You were seconds away from coming, and you knew it.

“O-otis, I think I’m going t-to,” You stutter as Otis picks up his pace, inserting another finger, the sensation itself practically sending you over the edge. He thrusts become even faster. In, out, in out, in out.

“Shuuuush, let go love,” Otis coos. Your walls flutter around his fingers.

“F-fuck! Otis!” You shout, coming around his fingers. Otis lessens his pace, and pulls out of you. “M-my god that was a-amazing.” You laugh, pulling Otis closer to you. “I want you, Otis. I need you.” Otis’s jaw drops. He quickly reaches over to the nightstand next to him, grabbing a condom from the drawer. He unwraps the packaging, slowly slipping the condom over his hard cock.

You hurriedly pull off his shirt, kissing him passionately at any chance you get. You yank down Otis’s boxers, revealing his hard member. Otis takes his erected cock into his hand, looking to your eyes one more time for permission. You nod your head in response as he lines himself up with your entrance.

Suddenly, Otis’s cock fills pushes through your folds and inside of you.

“Oh sh-shit,” Otis mutters, burying his head in your neck, and then pushing himself up again.

“H-holy f-fuck,” You cry out, tears rushing to your eyes. You knew it would feel different than fingering yourself, or how Otis had just fingered you, but this was different than what you expected. It hurt, but just for a second. After some time, the pain began to subside. Otis waits a minute, making sure you’ve adjusted to his size.

“A-are you alright?” Otis asks, brushing your cheek with his hand.

“Y-yes,” You mutter.

“Are you sure. We can stop if you don’t want to go any further,” Otis says, his voice kind and reassuring.

“No, I want this. I want you,” You say back to him, passion in your eyes. Otis nods, and begins to thrust in and out of you gently. The pain erases itself, and is replaced by total and utter pleasure. “F-fuck Otis.”

“(Y/N),” Otis hums as he quickens his pace. His cock was hard. It felt so good. “M-my g-god you’re so f-fucking wet,” Otis coos. His words alone could make you come.

Otis’s hand reaches down to your clit, and he begins to toy with it again. You dig your fingernails into his back, practically ready to scream in pleasure as he draws circles at your heat. Otis begins to lose his rhythm, his thrusts becoming extremely sloppy.

“I’m, I’m g-going to c-come,” Otis cries out shakily as a fire pools in your lower abdomen.

“M-me too,” You breath heavily. Your walls tighten around Otis’s pulsating cock. “Otis!” You cry out, coming around him.

“Oh-oh fuck,” Otis moans, letting go, thrusting deeply into you one last time.

Otis pulls out of your opening, crashing down on the bed, next to you. You lay there for some time, not saying anything, just enjoying each other’s company.

“That was…” You trail off. “Absolutely perfect.” You turn on your side to face Otis. He’s beaming with joy. He reaches a hand to your face, pushing the hair out of your eyes.

“Yeah, just like you,” He smirks, wrapping his arms around you and pulling the covers over you two.

“I love you, Otis,” You whisper into his ear.

“I love you, (Y/N),” Otis murmurs. Your eyes flutter closed, and open again, becoming heavy with sleep. You press your face into Otis’s chest, pressing kisses there.

“You know you aren’t just some guy in the corner, right? You’re special. You’re so fucking special,” You say, looking up to him. His diamond eyes meet your gaze.

“And you know you’re more important and more beautiful than every star in the galaxy, right?” You smile against his chest, pressing a kiss on his collarbone.

You really did love that boy, far more than words could ever say.

Far more than anything else.

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ca1e70-deactivated · 4 years

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a list of my entirely way too niche headcanons ive actually implemented for everyones imagination:

name options ive used and refuse to retire: david elizabeth strider (sometimes i dont feel like being a douche to others and saying thats not his name), harley davidson strider, and david james strider for the sake of simplicity

im not gonna tell yall the like. oc exes ive given him bc thatll take eighteen years.

i dont rlly have an explanation on the ghost thing besides the fact he just can? ive occasionally pulled from family ghost stories and experiences bc i somehow got landed with family members who lived in a haunted house for a decade and enjoy scaring me with all the stories (including the time my cousin literally died on the kitchen floor from a bronchial spasm and one of the friends that was over asked my aunt later what was up with the old man she saw in the corner of the room that night - my cousin is fine btw shes just a huge bitch and a third grade teacher and i dont like her)

whether or not hes done drugs is based on absolutely nothing besides how im feeling in that moment. either hes the designated driver and sober friend forever or he got fired from his job after doing a line at work during graveyard with some random customers theres no inbetween (this absolutely happened @ waho. if dave works at waho hes a mess of a person and thats on the diner itself.)

ok look i hc dave w/schizophrenia besides when i was 14 i had a hyperfixation with learning about it and then at 16 was prescribed a medication and had side effects so wack my therapist genuinely thought 14 yr old me was onto something and its a weird way to cope with the idea that lady put in my head that i might “develop it in my twenties” which i turn 20 this year and i havent been able to stop obsessing and panicking over the prospect so PLEASE dont come in my inbox calling me ableist im not out here all harley quinn in suicide squad with the voices ok hes medicated, he goes to therapy, the hard fast delusion that lil cal was nearly sentient and informed bro of every single thing dave did no matter how asinine it was is no longer a debilitatingly affecting him ANYWAYS

i actually use the chicken/egg farming family pretty often just because its hilarious to me to give dave like. an actual mom and dad. hes literally an uncle to like three different kids he just never visits because they make fun of his skinny jeans and he hates one of his (incredibly bare-bones ocs all of them) brothers who threatened to bash his head in with a little league bat after dave broke his star wars lego set apart on accident (but not rlly) so their parents were like “why dont you stay with your brother in the big city for a lil while champ” and then they just never picked him back up? and thats on favoritism

the other one is that his name is actually david reed and hes the middle child of a family of three who literally live the standard golden retriever white middle class life only they went to disney land or something equally as dumb one year when dave was like 6 and he wandered off so bro literally just went “huh free game” because frankly he was an idiot who thought maybe i should take this kid home because its real dangerous in parking lots and then it was too late to NOT have it seem like a kidnapping and thats why daves never had a summer job, seen his birth certificate, or gone to school. but vaguely remembers what kindergarten was like and having a pet dog and calling someone mom as a kid.

im not making a bullet point about his sex life headcanons just use your imagination and acknowledge the fact bro essentially worked within the sex industry and i enjoy putting dave through trauma as a catharsis

i stopped doing this one usually but if he did go to school hes been in percussion since fifth grade and played the drums in his high schools jazz band as well as various edgy teenager garage bands he likes to pretend dont have a youtube presence and that hes absolutely never been shirtless in front of plenty of his classmates because he wore a hoodie to a show like an idiot. idk occasionally ill put him in an actual band he doesnt hate but keeps separate from his lil turntechGodhead internet persona (which i will ALSO touch upon in a sec) until they wind up getting looped into a tour with some bigger named band that has a show in *insert beta kid here*’s city and hes gotta come clean solely so he can visit his online friend. sorry derseasterous thats the one time weve ever run into each other and i made him have a crush on one of his bandmates i was in my anti-daverose phase where i made dave a hoe and also didnt want to admit i still loved the ship all these years later

i hate it so much but you know the whole vr loli trap voice shit that was popular a while ago? hes fucking baller at it for some reason. he did it as a joke while talking to bro and they both about shat their pants. if im feeling real ambitious, hes got a separate soundcloud solely dedicated to doing dumbass rap covers or making his own but in the voice under the pseudonym elizabeth “beth” davids that he will never admit is his. well, he will, but hes gonna be really fucking embarrassed about it. irony or not.

talking abt seperate soundclouds and stuff ive always had it where turntechGodhead was his like. essentially internet fucking persona facade shit he used because we all had that phase where we wanted memorable urls and stuff but also didnt want to totally ignore the nagging fear of people finding you in real life, until it turned into real life ppl finding you on the internet. so he also has basically an adjacent set of social media under the same name but its just a boring username i havent decided on so everyone he knows irl doesnt mix up with what hes made for himself as TG and the people he knows as TG dont know what highschool he goes to. (this occasionally comes with the territory of ppl on parp being pissed that daves “lying” or “hiding things” from his friends as if he was doing it out of spite instead of just keeping embarrassing tagged photos and videos from football games or when he ate shit at the skatepark from fucking with his “rap career”)

every once in a while i get on a kick where hes just german. like, i just replace houston texas with hamburg germany and have him apply to a university in whatever state is applicable for whoever im chatting with and it goes from there? sometimes he moved when he was little and went through the whole visa thing, sometimes he didnt go through the visa thing, sometimes hes a dual citizen because of family and shit, its all dependent on what suits the situation best.

one that ive been fucking with for a while but hardly break out (until recently with like 5 roses in the span of one day hell yeah) is that he has a neighbor at the end of the hall who is like a thousand year old witch lady that hes basically adopted as his mother figure in lieu of not having one and shes totally cool with it, especially bc when she kicks the bucket she fully plans on giving dave all her occult stuff so her figure-skating coach and realtor daughter doesnt sell it at a garage sale and lets it all go to waste. she also once brought rose up by name in a conversation without any prompting of her existence which dave didnt realize for days, and then one time cryptically stopped and stared at an empty space in the wall, went “she has potential, you know.” then looked at him sitting on her kitchen counter with a smile “lots of it” and hes thought about that weekly ever since. (it is important to note one of the occult items he leaves her is literally her own personal book of shadows shes been filling out for decades its like a 600 page leatherbound book dave has no idea what its used for but the sheer amount of homemade spells and etc in it is like. gonna murder rose the second this chick gets her hands on it i promise you.)

theres the standard strife shit? im not rlly gonna get into those theyre all basically cookie cutter bullshit. its just standard bro and dave abuse talk. i like to inclulde the whole 24hr live cam up in the apartment that definitely watches dave in every room besides his own and the bathroom, but that quickly delves into the prospect of middle-aged men stalking him online and basically sexually harassing him in his own god damn home by talking about how they can see him just trying to take his shoes off in the living room after getting home and frankly? its not one of my best takes! but once you throw it into the headcanon bin, its there forever.

he actually really does do something with his photography but not enough to warrant anything exciting, but he has his own branding for it and regularly takes pictures of his friends or anything else he thinks is moderately interesting enough to take pictures of, but those are just thrown into shoeboxes under his bed in favor of posting genuine shots because he wants to keep his image intact and blurry photos of jade smiling in the tree they climbed up together while bec paws at the base of it while whining isnt exactly something he wants the whole world to see.

i also pretty often but him into either paleontology OR i put him down as trying to become a mortician because he thinks handing roadkill once he graduated from museum giftshop specimens to doing his own taxidermy on the side has prepared him enough to perform an occasional autopsy and start embalming real human corpses. (sometimes i put my own desires in and make them his bc i have to project at some point and put him through the same EMT course i dropped out of bc it was one semester and he already has pretty decent first aid skills, but he definitely didnt expect it to be as fucking wild at times as it is, but whats he gonna do? get a job back at waffle house? the company hes working for just offered to pay like half his associates in paramedicine tuition and hes already got all his pre-recs done when he started for paleo. at least its a stable job and hes got the ability to be compassionate in the moment)

im running out of things that ive done to the poor kid. OH

hes not a virgin he had a girlfriend all four years of high school (shes also one of his optional and designated exes plz keep up) and their relationship ends in one of two ways: she dies in a car accident a week before their high school graduation, or she stops talking to him entirely a week after their high school graduation until a couple years later she gets into (guess what) a car accident with her current wife/girlfriend and dies which leaves behind their daughter. who just so happens to also be daves daughter. her name is hannah and i love her like my own but no one ever likes her and thats on the conditioning of dirk. does dave end up taking her in? yes. shes awesome and the first time he takes her to the park to like run off some fucking steam she disappears for two minutes and dave is moderately terrified until she comes back holding a dead baby squirrel and thats the moment he realizes huh maybe things really do be genetic.

ok at the bottom of the list im gonna add the couple of times hes been a camboy which usually coincides with the live apartment cam thing and the amount of people in his dms calling him hot or whatever, but typically its more of a started the day he turned 18 and basically dipped around 20 in favor of showing up randomly with no warning to complain about a video game dick in hand because it gives him an outlet that wont annoy his friends bc this is the fifteenth time hes had a lot to say this week about a certain boss battle and also the comments fuel his ego and daddy issues.

the last one wasnt the bottom but literally unless its explicitly proven otherwise every time anyone rps with me there is the underlying fact dave strider was a goalie on his high school lacrosse teams all four years and (shocker another one) definitely had the hots for one of his teammates like major hots like first gay experience hots. like it was painfully obvious that teammate also liked him back hots. like one night at a team sleepover one of the other guys was like can yall just makeout and get it over with were fucking tired and dave really had the balls to be offended and ask what the fuck they were talking about while literally sitting halfway in the mans lap bc for some reason they had to share the same chair.

he is also guilty until proven innocent of being the worlds biggest loner outside of that sports team and even though hes literally a jock he still opts to eat his lunch alone in the hallway or something like that and has a tendency to leave girls on read, but bc hes got an in with the rest of the jocks hes basically drug around to plenty of parties and since hes conventionally attractive enough and popular in the aloof way that he is, hes got plenty of tagged insta posts and twitter directs and snapchat streaks going.

THESE WERE ALL NO GAME AND DONT INVOLVE SHIPS BC I LIKE TO KEEP MY OPTIONS OPEN AND THEYRE LITERALLY ALL BASED OFF RPS IVE DONE I HOPE YALL JUDGE ME ACCORDINGLY

#theres probably so many more i mean #ive been on parp for at least 5-6 years now #ive been on cherubplay probably the same amount of time #and my memory is totally shot to fuck but these are just what i know ive done in the last YEAR #or thought were wild enough to remember #i put it under a read more bc frankly its really fucking long #and i dont want this to represent me entirely #these are also heavily situational based and not like. emotion or reaction based much?#some of them are #i guess i could rename this to like. things ive done on parp #but theyre technically still headcanons a lot of them can coincide with whatever #so theyre not very specific situations #anyways #this took me an hour

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nie7027 · 5 years

Text

Super5 headcanons pt 2

Edit: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Minegishi can only stare

"Where the fuck have you been?"

"What do you care?"

"Why are you here?"

"I was bored"

Shimazaki could be here to kill him for betraying him but Minegishi is too tired for this and there are dishes to wash.

In the time it takes him to do the dishes and calm down his plants, shimazaki falls asleep so he goes to the living to room to get a better look at the man

Shimazaki looks almost the same except maybe a bit thinner and with possible hollower eyes. The crooked nose is definitely new. A crooked nose?? Did he broke his nose at some point?? He is even wearing the same clothes as last time. His precious jacket ripped at the edges. Scorching marks and bullet holes here and there.

With a long sigh he takes out his phone, turns off the volume and opens the super3 chat(the too spicy for Seris innocent eyes). The messages start to come in rapidly

Minegishi: Shimazaki is back

Hatori: what

Hatori: what do you mean Shimazaki is back???

Shibata: how did he find us? Did he try to fight you?

Minegishi: i mean he is asleep on my couch. No, he just ate all of my cereal.

Shibata: what the fuck?

Hatori: what the fuck?

Minegishi what the fuck indeed

Shibata: did he say what he wants? Do you know why is he here?

Minegishi: He didnt talk and I dont know

Hatori: what do we do?

Minegishi:

Minegishi: i dont know.

Minesishi: i cant make any calls or else he could wake up and seri isnt logged in so can someone call him and tell him whats going so they can take the necessary precautions

Shibata: im on it

Shibata: hatori is freaking out in his room anyway. I think he is begginin to build a security system.

Minegishi: ...

Shibata: yeah yeah ill go calm him after i talk with Seri.

Minegishi stares at his phones and then at the man on his couch, he cant blame them. Shimazaki is a really dangerous person and they dont know what he is doing here. Minegishi just wanted to do the dishes, water his plants and go to sleep.

The super5 will never know but Shimazaki wasnt lying per se. He WAS bored.

After he ran away from the fight against seasoning city espers he hid here and there taking his sweet time at recovering and once he did(his nose still felt strange but he ignored it) he started to look at what to do.

He joined many criminal organizations, afterall a teletransporter was very valued in the underworld. But not matter how petty or big the crime was, he got bored. So he ended leaving all of them. he even left some in the middle of a important job, not caring whether his employers got caught or not( it was their fault for being stupid and not having a backup plan anyway)

After some months of this he realized he was bored of normal criminals. He was bored of normal persons with narrowed mindsets who conformed with just comitting stupid crimes. HE HAD BEEN PART OF A PLAN TO TAKE THE WORLD and now he was trafficking some drug?? Lame.

Most of all he missed the thrilling sensation of being surrounded with persons that could actually put a fight against him. So he searched for something alike to claw, an organization of espers.

His search turned out fruitless and he decided then he should return to where all started. Claw. It was time to pay a visit to his expartners.

It took him just a week to locate them. It would have took him just a day but he was finally having some fun and god he was gonna drag it all he could.

So here he was in a tiny empty apartment, the crazy amount of plants with a certain aura being the only indication that it belonged to Minegishi...WHERE THE HELL WAS HE? Oh well. He had been waiting for a year. He could wait a little more. In any case in his hurry to get here he forgot to eat and he could hear a fridge running.

Shimazaki, still on the sofa, wakes up the next day at the sound of a blender. He is being held in place, bounded by lots and lots of thick green vines and sturdy roots from which he easily frees himself. The moment he does so the noise at the kitchen stops and an annoyed minegishi steps out. Shimazaki can feel him tensing, preparing for an attack and that makes him smirk .

Until an alarm clock goes off that makes Minegishi mutter a curse

"If you are gonna do something do it now. I have better things to do and i have to go now"

"Better things to do?? What can possibly be better than this??"

"I have work so if you are gonna just stand there and smirk be my guest"

"Work?"

"Yeah, work. you know? That thing you do for a living and that contributes to society? Fuck it.You probably dont. Anyway i gotta go" Turning his back on shimazaki is probably the worst idea but he couldnt sleep at all, he is late and he hasnt had breakfast so if shimazaki wants to kill him he will gladly accept it.

He miraculously manages to exit his apartment and make it to his work. He only hopes theres an apartment to come back later.

Shimazaki can only stare increduously to where minegishis used to stand. 'Work'? 'Contribute to society'? THE FUCK WAS HE BABBLING ABOUT this was completely unexpected and he doesnt know what to do until he notices theres a smell coming from the kitchen where Minegishi left his untouched breakfast. Well he supposes he can muse how to proceed over breakfast.

Hatori isnt allowed to use his phone at work but he is too anxious to care and he has powers to do it without anybody noticing

Spicy3 chat

Hatori: how did it went?

Minegishi: ...well...i guess?? I am alive and my flat was still in one piece last time i saw it

Hatori: he didnt try anything?

Minegishi: he woke up when it was time for me to go...so i just kinda left

Shibata: you just left? He didnt try to stop you???

Minegishi: no

Minegishi:but i think...

Hatori: WHAT

Shibata:what

Minegishi: i think he is...tired.

Minegishi: I bound him while he was sleeping and he never woke up nlr stirred. He didnt notice.

Hatori: weird

Minegishi: i know. Worst of all i couldnt eat and i have 2 hours more left until my break.

Shibata: i can pass on my way to gym and sneak you something

Minegishi: thanks

Hatori: if you want you can hang in our apartment for the time being. We still need to know what he wants

Shibata: yeah, and if he shows up we can fight him together💪

Minegishi: if Seri asks, everything is under control

It takes a week for Shimazaki to finally show up. Meanwhile Minegishi has to use Hatoris and Shibatas washing machine to wash his work uniform daily(it can get very dirty when you work in a flower shop) because his other sets of uniform are back at his place trapped with Shimazaki. So is his money and he has to lend some from Hatoris and shibatas and ask his boss for an advencement in his payment. He hates Shimazaki more now.

They cant do anything but stare blankly when he suddenly shows up in the middle of the living room where they were eating pizza holding an empty box of cereal and says "Theres no more food back there and i want more of these but i cant see how they are called" while pointing at the box.

Sometimes its very easy to forget he is actually blind. Hatori weakly says the name of the branch of cereal he is holding and Shimazaki dissapears again before anybody can say anything.

"Did everybody saw what i just saw right??what the fuck? What the fuck?" shibata exclaims

"...my food"minegishi laments

Its not until an hour of wondering what was that and wracking their brain for an asnwer after that shimazaki returns, a brand new box of the cereal in his hands. He picks up a slice of the forgotten pizza and sits besides Shitaba.

"You didnt pay for that did you?" asks Shitaba

Shimazaki just turns around and stares st him with his hauntingly empty eyes "you too?"

"PAY? WORK? CONTRIBUTE TO SOCIETY? THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU"

"Weve changed"

"Yeah we have jobs and stuff, we help peopl"

"YOU HAVE SUPERPOWERS! WHY ARE YOU EVEN WORKING?"

"TO NOT PARASITE ON OTHERS HARD WORK LIKE SOME PEOPLE IN HERE" finally explodes Minegishi

The man frowns and rapidly done with the conversation teleports away.

Minegishi finally returns to his place, his web of plants telling him Shimazaki isnt there anymore. Re stashing his fridge and cabinet is a pain in the ass.

Shimazakis plan had been to either find his expartners and form something alike to Claw with them or just antagonize them until he gets the fight he so much craves. None of that has happened because all of them had turned to a bunch of weakling pussies and he cant even find Serizawa.

He could still try to fight them but he bitterly realizes he wont get any satisfaction of beating them if they keep acting like that, restraining themselves and trying to be civil as if they werent the same persons that destroyed this very city a year ago. It would be like punching flowers!

The point was to get rid of his boredness and now he is just angry!

He needs them to drop the act.

Thats when a plan starts to form in his head and he smirks. He is going to show them what they are missing on.

Thats how he finds himself back in minegishis apartment.

"Im just saying you could probably grow tons of weed, good quality of course. And i take care of the transport i know a bunch of people-"

"Weed? Are you serious? Is this why you came back? To start a drug trafficking bussines?"

"Im just saying with my teletransporting abilities and yourplant thing we could save lots of money in transport and become richer than-"

"No"

"AREN YOU TIRED OF THIS? OF SHITTY CUSTOMERS GETTING YOU IN TROUBLE JUST BECAUSE THEY DONT KNOW RAINBOW ROSES DONT NATURALLY EXIST?"

"WHERE YOU SPYING ME AT WORK?"

"MAYBE SO"

"DONT DO IT AND STOP EATING ALL MY FOOD"

He then tries with shibata, approaching him during one of his morning running routines. Teletransporting every 2 meters at his side while he keeps running clearly ignoring him

"With your force, not that i need it, we could terrorize all the bussines of a whole prefecture and force them to pay for protection. We win, they win"

"Not interested"

"Why not?! It would be so easy"

"I dont want to"

"Could you stop running? This is important"

"No thanks"

"You arent even listening!"

"Good"

He finally tries with Hatori thinking he would be the easiest of them

"You hack the system and we force all those politicians to pay us to not release all their dirty secrets"

"I am busy"

"No you are not. You are playing mario kart. I can hear Yoshi"

"Ive changed"

"Have you? Really???" at this point Shimazaki raises an eyebrow, he is so done and he wont keeo with this bullshit "because everywhere i have been, and i have been everywhere, the interpol, cia, you name it HAS BEEN AFTER ME whereas you three can waltz into a store like nobodys bussiness. WE COMMITED THE SAME CRIME. WE DESTROYED THIS CITY so how come im the only one being persecuted? Huh? You think I DONT KNOW WHAT YOU DID"

Hatori pauses the game and glares at him. Good, he is finally getting a reaction.

" i did what had to be done and i wont let YOU of all people tell me-"

"Me? Of all people? You believe yourself so grand and high when you are nothing but THE SAME AS ME" immediately shimazaki feels hatoris aura flare. what must have been his console shifting and changing into something new. Whatever it is, he is sure he can block it.

"Really? You are gonna fight me? I want to see you-" a horrible sound like nothing he had ever heard before pierces his ears making him howl in pain and he teleports away.

After that accident shimazaki never mentions Hatoris dirty secret again but that doesnt stop him from keep trying to get them to commit felonies again.

He thinks he once "saw" Serizawa on the street but his aura was quickly eaten by the aura of the person by his side. He didnt stayed to find out and quickly teleported away.

And this goes like this for 3 months, his proposals becoming more and more desesperate until one day he just... gives up.

Shimazaki should have left or killed them months ago but for some reason he prefers to stay here. He wont admit it but hes having more fun living on their couches annoying them than what he would have had they accepted his proposals.

He takes special delight in annoying them when they had hard days. (Minegishi comes home covered in something stinky and almost strangles shimazaki with his own hands after he comments this wouldnt have happened if he had accepted to traffick weed in a yacht with him)

...besides he has noticed that now in both apartments there is always a box of his favourite cereal (hatori sweared it was the cereal what placated Shimazaki given how docile he was whenever he was seen eating it, shibata and minegishi just liked it)

The super3 cant believe it themselves but they have now gotten used to the constant presence of Shimazaki in their lives (which isnt surprising given they spent at least 3 years together).

Well constant is a way to put it because the man still has the habit of dissapearing 3-5 days every once in a while and reappearing like nothing happened

But they know this cant keep going like this and thats how minegishi finds himself texting the super3 chat one day he comes to an empty apartment

Minegishi: is shimazaki there?

Hatori: yeah, hes playing smash with shitaba

Minegishi: playing smash??

Hatori: its seems he learned the patron of my movements by observing me and now hes kicking Shitabas ass as princess peach

Minegishi: ?

Hatori: we told him he was playing bowser

Minegishi: whatever, tell him to bring his ass back. I need to go grocery shopping and i need his help

"Why would i help you grocery shopping?" says shimazaki suddenly to his right

At the same his phone sounds 2 times

Shibata: hatori said something to him and he just teleported

Shibata: is safe to assume he is with you?

Minegishi: yea, im taking charge from here

"Im teaching you to do grocery shopping"

"I dont need you to teach me shit"

" yes, you do if you want to keep eating that cereal you like and that you finished this morning"

Shimazaki raises his eyebrow, teleports and after 5 min returns with 5 boxes of the damn cereal in his arms

"There. Its done"

"DID YOU JUST ROBBED THEM? YOU CANT KEEP DOING THIS"

"WHY NOT? ITS EASIER"

"THATS NOT THE POINT"Minegishi stops, breathes amd tries again "Shimazaki you cant keep doing this and i dont mean just the whole robbing, i mean i dotn know what you do when you dissapear for days but when you are here you just eat our food, wait for us to come home from work and then annoy us?"

"So? I can do whatever i want"

"Do you realize how pathethic it sounds?Is this really all you want to do? Do you even know what you want to do?"

Shimazaki doesnt wanna hear anymore of that and teleports

He ends teleporting to a random alley where he passes the night

The next days his mood isnt any better and he spends them sleeping, terrorizing random deliquents he finds in his way and kicking bags of trash until one day of the "bags" lets out a yelp.

Its shibata who finds him some days later during one of his running routines when he follows the sound of a hurt dog

Expecting to see a bunch of nasty kids terrorizing a poor animal he steps up to confront them only to find his missing "friend" glaring at poor dog and screaming "STOP COMPLAINING ITS YOUR FAULT FOR NOT MOVING I DIDNT EVEN KICK YOU THAT HARD"

He texts a quickl "Found him" to the group chat and marches up to him

"You shouldnt be kicking random things in the first place"

"Get lost"

" are you sure you didnt kick him hard? He is limping and we both know your kicks arent exactly soft"

"If i had wanted, a limp would be the least of its problems" still he makes a face as if he isnt sure

With a sigh Shibata carefully picks up the dog and motions to shimazaki "theres a vet nearby. You kicked him so you own him that at least. Dont worry ill pay" he doesnt wait for Shimazakis response and walks, relief overflowing him once he hears footsteps behind him

The consult is quick and the vet gleefully hands shimazaki "his" dog while she explains to shibata the treatment they should follow the next three months

Shimazaki...had never in his life pet a dog, much less carried one. His fur feels dirty and is tangled everywhere but the vet said it just needs a bath. It is warm and he can feel and hear his steady breaths. His mental eye allows him to perceive the flowing of his blood, the currents in his brain, the beating of his heart...all what makes a living being held in his arms. Things he has always perceived but never payed attention. The fact that the dog starts to lick his hands doesnt go unnoticed and he feels strangely calm. His grip tightening.

They are about to exit the clinic, shibata saying his last thanks when a woman and a girl enter. That very moment the dog starts to squirm in his embrace. And he doesnt know what to do

"Hey are you alright? I can hold it if you want" asks shibata noticing his turmoil

" yeah, its just the stupid dog WHO HAS FORGOTTEN HE CANT WALK"

The girls who shibata notices has red puffy narrows her eyes and yells "DONT CALL HIM STUPID YOU ARE THE STUPID" before turning to look at shimazaki, whatever she was going to say next is forgotten as she stares with wide eyes.

Both the moms and shimazakis replies are drowned by the girl scream of "UESAMA! MOM ITS HIM ITS MY DOG"

For some reason shimazaki feels his blood run cold and lifts up the dog even more when the girl comes clashing at his legs desesperately trying to grab her dog

Shibata who noticed shimazakis earlier expression cant believe what hes seeing (please god, please tell me he isnt gonna fight a girl over a dog) when the vet decides to come out to see what is happening

"Im sorry, my little girl believes those boys over there have Uesama"

"ITS HIM"

"Uesama?..." the vet stares some seconds in confusion before her eyes grow wider "Oh how didnt i notice it before! Im sorry sirs but it seems you have found this little girls dogs" the vets looks expectantly at shimazaki

Shimazaki who has been holding a very squirming dog and listening to the screams of a girls is starting to get very annoyed. The tempation to teleport away with the dog too big to ignore. Hes about to do it when he hears the dog crying again.

With a huff he hands it to the very thankful mother and exits the clinic as quickly as he can.

Shibata follows suit "I saw your face before they arrived. I can tell what you did"

"Shut up"

The walk home is strangely quiet but at least he is back.

The joke on the spicy chat is that the super 3 are dumb and believe they are protecting oh so pure Seri when in reality they just share dumb penis jokes while Seri is actually riding Reigens dick.

And yes as his last crime Hatori threatened with realeasing all the state secrets of all the goverments and provoking a worldwide crisis if they didnt allow them to try to live normal lives

I just noticed this is more of a fanfic than a list of headcanons now but meh. What i wanted to actually be part 2 is gonna be part 3? 4? I didnt even get to write the prank the super5 were gonna pull on shimazaki but now you have something to look up next time.

Im not that happy with how the second half turned out but maybe im just tired.

#mob psycho 100 #mp100 #minegishi toshiki #hatori nazomu #shibata hiroshi #shimazaki ryou #should i tag animal violence?#manga spoilers #mp100 spoilers #super5 headcanons #nie's writing

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golgoterror · 5 years

Text

Your name is Jake English and you’re about to fulfill your destiny.

Ever since you were thirteen, you knew it had to be done. Your grandma had been killed for it, you were on your island became of it, and you had your last name as a result of it. Everything was set in stone. When John’s retcon blue faded and the eight of you now stood on a stage before Caliborn, a box, a strange bunny, and Lil’ Cal, it suddenly set in. This was when it was going to happen. You were going to give Lord English his first defeat.

==> Jake: Prepare

The first thing you notice is the cherub’s sickening laugh, which came about after initial confusion. This is almost like the trigger of a pistol because everyone jumps up and beings rummaging about, including yourself. Truth be told, you have no idea what in the fuck you’re doing. You haven’t even tried using your powers yet, nor do you believe you can. Your eyes leap from the bunny to the box to the puppet to the cherub, then back, looping around. Occasionally, you catch glimpses of your teammates. None of you know what to do. At this moment, you wonder if maybe, perhaps, you all bit off just a bit more than you lot could ever dream to chew.

None of you settle down until the green bastard before you leaps off his makeshift podium. Out comes a very strange, white house-looking thing. You’d ponder what it was, perhaps even noting the similarities between it and that symbol on the game’s papers, but you don’t have time. Suddenly, your grandmother ( but younger ) and her friends get sucked into it, and the box closes. Half your team is down. Is there really any hope of winning this? That’s all you can think as you half-hide behind Dirk, though keep your ground in front of the girls.

The sound of Caliborn hitting the box eats away at your brain. Are they safe? Are they hurt? Will he do that to the rest of you? A wave of questions crashes down on your mind, causing you to not think straight in the slightest. You barely even register Dirk demanding his puppet be returned. You blink, and suddenly, a fight breaks out.

==> Jake: Fight

Dirk, being in the front, is kicked down first, and Jane is thrown back. You’ll have none of that! No one hurts your friends, especially not with you in earshot! You’re a big, strong adventurer… Right?

No. No, you’re not. You’re not a fighter. That point has hit you like a speeding bullet multiple times since you awoke from the trickster spell. But you’ll be damned if you aren’t going to help your friends. Which is your first move, as you rush to Jane to help her up. If you can’t fight, at least you can see if she’s alright. Minorly hurt, but nothing to write home about. Still, you’re furious. Anger is boiling over in you at the mere idea that he’d go after your dear friend. An attempt is made at the so-called defeat you’re ready to gift the cherub, a fist coming up as you turn around, when, suddenly -- he pushes you over and kicks you with such force, you’re sent back into the side of the stage. As pathetic as it is to say, this is enough to cause you to wobble as you get back up. One of your resulting stumbles lands in a bad place as no stage is there to catch your foot and you tumble to the floor below.

The force was a lot stronger than you’d ever care to admit. Now, like the weakling you are, you’re immobile on the ground, forced to listen to the grunts and moans of your three friends getting their asses handed back to them. Was that it? Your one shot at a defeat? Did you just doom your entire timeline because you fell off of a stupid stage?

All four of you are getting kicked and punched in a cycle, and none of you are getting up. The whines from your friends hurt more than any of the hits. You’ve failed at keeping your friends safe. In a matter of minutes, you’ve fucked up so badly, you can’t even reclaim your own last name.

Pathetic.

PATHE--

That last hit does you in. The edges of your sight get fuzzy before darkening. It hits you what’s happening, but not before you fall unconscious on the floor below you.

==> Jake: Black Out

Below you is your bed. On your head, your skulltop. Dirk just finished telling you some sort of story. A real kicker of a story, if you do say so yourself. So many twists and turns. How prodigious it was!

GT: Anyhoo thats a heck of a tragic and thrilling tale dirk. GT: I am still totally cockeyed and catawampus about it all i dont even know what to think. TT: But you believe me, right?

What… were you two talking about?

GT: Oh yeah every word of it! TT: Wow. GT: Why shouldnt i? You are my friend and i trust you.

This feels strange.

TT: I still just think it's impressive, is all. Even after all this time. You are pretty much a one of a kind dude. GT: Heh not really i just like believing stuff and believing in people. GT: Wait what do you mean? TT: About what? GT: When you said after all this time? GT: You just told me now! TT: Yes. GT: Hang on. GT: Blarg! The deja vuey shit is happening again!!! GT: Okay i am SURE weve had this conversation before so many things are familiar. GT: I remember you saying the one of a kind dude thing and i remember saying the word catawampus and... GT: All of it! GT: Whats going on?

You’re right. You have said this all before. Every word of it.

TT: Took you long enough to figure it out. TT: Pages really are a slow burning class. Damn. GT: Figure what out! TT: You're asleep. GT: Oh.

Of course. You’re asleep. And this isn’t Dirk. It’s Brain Ghost Dirk. You don’t remember falling asleep though… Or do you? Wasn’t something important happening?

GT: What… were we on about? GT: My goodness my mind is foggy… TT: Damn, you’re fucking forgetful. TT: This whole thing started with your grandma and Lord English. We then wrapped around about my timeline and here we are. GT: Wait what was that first thing? TT: Your grandma. GT: No after that. TT: My timeline. GT: Work with me strider for crying out loud!!! TT: Lord English. GT: Yeah! That!

Why is that so important? Those two words. They stick out like sore thumbs, causing you to bite your tongue.

GT: Oh! I was serving the guy up some slap stew! TT: More like he was serving you, bro. GT: Oh. Right. TT: You can still turn it around, though. GT: I can? TT: I dunno. You’re the hope guy, remember? GT: Haha. I thought i was. TT: What’s changed? GT: Oh you know nothing much just about EVERYTHING. TT: Well, do you think it’s worth a shot? GT: I mean id like to hope so. TT: There you go. GT: What? GT: Oh. GT: Hardy har har. TT: Dust yourself off and give it another go. Your words, not mine.

Hearing that alone brought a smile to your face. Dirk, whether in Brain Ghost form or not, always believed in you. Maybe even enough to make you believe in yourself on rare occasions. That alone gave you some hope.

GT: Then ive got some english ass to kick! GT: Wait i mean his ass not mine!!! TT: I gathered that much.

==> Jake: Wake Up

At some point, you feel your eyes blink a few times. The sounds, which begin muffled and hide behind a ringing in your ears, become louder and louder, until they’re making your head swim. You’re not done. The fight isn’t over.

Grabbing the side of the stage, you get up, regardless of how dizzy you feel. Roxy and Jane aren’t doing anything, so that only leaves one person to be leading the resistance. Climbing on stage, you see Dirk, incredibly hurt, but fighting nonetheless. He was always a fighter, something you wish you were more like. But he’s in bad shape.

What you did to him was wrong. Ghosting him was the worst thing you could have done, and you know that now. Do you still love him? Does it matter? He’s always been there for you, either as a lover or a best friend. You can’t stand to see him take a beating like this. Tears well in your eyes. Blinking them away just makes them run down your cheeks. When Dirk falls and Caliborn kicks him, that’s the last straw. You’re angry. So angry, in fact, you want to kick his ass. So much so, you’re going to do it. You’re going to kick his fucking ass.

==> Jake: Defeat This Poor Son Of A Bitch

Flying into the air, you force yourself between the two and yell. You yell so hard, you barely even notice the glow around your body, the ball forming around you, or how the stage is being brightened up. The hope is so big and out of control, it swallows the three of you, though your intent is not to hurt Dirk. Caliborn is not so lucky. He’s yelling, which you can’t hear over your own screams and sobs. Eventually, the shield gets so big, Roxy and Jane are subject to it, along with everything around you guys. But you don’t want to destroy anything but Caliborn.

==> Jake: Calm Down

You’re so lost in your anger, you barely even know what’s happening. Then, a soft voice in your head tells you to calm down. As quick as it came, the ball is gone, though you’re still glowing. Once the anger clouding your eyes has blown away, you look down at whom you just defeated, who is currently staring up at the ceiling. He’s not hurt. At least, not physically, from what you can see, but he does look very broken. Exhaustion barrels into you and you fall to the floor, lying on your stomach, hands trying to push yourself back up. You can’t, but Dirk and Caliborn both do.

You’re unsure if you’ve fallen unconscious again or not, but three metallic horses land on the stage. The pure, unadulterated absurdity of this makes you wonder if this is some sort of fever dream, but you feel awake, so what the fuck. Though with a bit of added strength from them, you get to your hands and knees, then stand.

Caliborn is walking towards you four and, for a brief moment, you’re worried. Then, the famed red sprite Arquius comes out from the shadows ( was he always there? ) and grabs Caliborn by the neck from behind. The green asshole is choking, gasping for air, and you don’t know how to react. Luckily, the other three seem to be equally as shitting-their-pants scared as you are. This is only heightened when Dirk seems to attempt destroying them, their souls stretching and deforming, but it’s futile. As a last resort, everyone but you and your posse gets sucked into the puppet. Then, with a nod of Roxy’s head, the puppet is gone.

You stand there in awe, wondering what just happened. Did you do it? Did you just defeat and, as a result, create Lord English? Does this mean the timeline isn’t doomed? As the other four lost kids return, you want to smile. You honestly, truly want to grin. This day has been built-up since your birth, yet, you feel empty. A fight was still going to go down. All you did was make one of the main targets all the more terrifying. But you had to. This was your purpose.

With a pat on the back from Dirk, almost to signal you had done something right, whether you believe that or not, you all get prepared for the final battle and the subsequent winning of the game. A part of you feels your job is done, though.

Your name is Jake English and you just fulfilled your destiny.

==> Jake: Get Ready To Kick Some Felt Ass

#drabble.#(( i've been wanting to explore him defeating le for a while now u_u ))#(( and we only have info from caliborn and john's perspecive ))#(( so. here's jake's ))#(( i write dirk for like 10 lines and i assure you he sucks but i'm not a dirk rper so it's w/e ))#(( anyway. here you go. my first drabble on here ))

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matrixaffiliate · 5 years

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Like the Storybooks

Co-written with @hufflepuffmarlenemckinnon

FFN and AO3

(sorry everyone, my internet died as I was trying to post this)

Chapter 20

Sirius, as matter of habit, rose with the sun. He was already, to some extent, aware that Marlene did not. She would have to be woken by a lady’s maid in order to be on time for breakfast. But on that first day of their secret marriage, Sirius stayed in bed with the sleeping princess and just took in the sight of her. She’d cast off her shift entirely nearly as soon as her inner chamber door was shut behind them and hadn’t found instance in the interim to reclothe herself.

Though he’d certainly seen representation of the nude female form in paintings and sculptures, but this was a new experience. He had not expected that his life would include an extremely undressed heartbreakingly beautiful woman lying sleeping next to him. The the new day’s light peeked through the bed curtain, reflecting off her hair like a halo. He silently thanked the lord that his new wife slept deeply and well into the morning. The look on his face was probably worthy of all the ribbing he would take from the king and then some. But he couldn’t help it. He’d always contended that a princess like this should not, by all logic, have been a real person. He had only become more sure of this as he fell in love with the woman. He pulled her into his arms and kissed the top of her sleeping head.

She stirred. Little sounds escaped from her perfect mouth but none of them came together into anything that Sirius understood as language.

“Good Morrow, My Princess.”

Though he’d intended to remind her that they were meant to tell the king and queen about their marriage and beg their blessings, he forgot all about it as Marlene’s mouth found his.

The couple were not in attendance at breakfast that morning.

After a truly mortifying experience involving the Lady’s maid, Emmeline, Sirius was quite glad to be clothed and above suspicion that afternoon.

Eventually the opportunity presented itself for himself and Marlene to speak privately with the King and Queen.

After they’d made a show of propriety for lookers on, and were well out of earshot, Marlene took no prisoners in the endeavor.

“We’ve entered into a precontracted marriage. I assumed you’d be pleased with the match. It was rather late into the evening when the discussion came to pass, you see. Waiting until morning to beg your permission seemed both unnecessary and vexsom.” She was fearless in such a way that set Sirius’s pulse racing. The walls he’d carefully constructed around parts of his mind had come crashing down all at once and only hours ago. He was still adjusting to the fact he didn’t just love her; he was allowed to desire her. The whole thing was very distracting, to say the least.

James’s face was truly a sight as he took in the statement his cousin had matter of factly dolled out. He cycled through confusion to shock, onto mild disgust and finally to amusement. Sirius could have predicted the exact responses, but they were quite a lot of fun to watch, regardless.

“You broke through my knight’s chastity belt? I thought he had it soldered on.”

“Marriage tends to be the key to such things.” Marlene smirked at the King and then winked at the Queen who chuckled.

Sirius still had not said said anything up to that point. He’d expected that the king would make some sort of crack about the concept of chastity. He’d been a little too loud in his defense of the virtue being ideal in a knight for this to have gone any other way. It did not stop his face from heating up with embarrassment. Why did this have to be discussed? Couldn’t they just… talk of war or something? Surely they had enough battles to plan that this was all very silly?

He chided himself that he’d rather plan the demise of his own family, where good men would surely die, than tolerate a little embarrassment. Marlene, surely did not seem embarrassed in the least. She seemed quite pleased with herself.

Sirius no longer wanted to think about war, all he could think of was how very difficult this secret would be to keep. It was a battle unto itself to refrain from touching her.

“Am I to understand your mild insults as your blessings upon our union?” Sirius smirked, tearing his eyes away from his wife to meet his dearest friend and sovereign eye to eye.

“Yes many blessings and all that. But it’s not going to be popular with… nearly anyone… so I hope you have some sort of plan.” James turned to Marlene with a pained expression.

“I always have a plan, cousin.” Marlene rolled her eyes with a huff and Sirius restrained from kissing her as her eyes flashed dangerously. “You knew my mother. I’m ashamed you had any doubt.”

“I had no plan. Largely, I just do what her Grace tells me.” Sirius admitted, chuckling as Marlene regained her temper.

“Well that sounds like the start of a long and happy marriage to me. What’s the plan, your Grace?” Queen Lily’s warm smile reassured Sirius that he hadn’t stepped on any royal toes in making this rather hasty decision.

“It’s best if we keep our union a secret from the court until my husband returns to me a Duke.” Marlene moved to take Sirius’ arm and smiled at her own jest. She was making it very hard not to kiss her, and by the look on her face she knew it.

“Your instincts are good, cousin. I hope that you’ll advise me someday when the Chief Minister has decided she’s had quite enough. Though I am concerned that there will be rather glaring evidence of your marriage before we are able to take Semprapuria, at least with the current plan in place.” James looked pointedly at Marlene.

Sirius didn’t quite understand. Everyone was already meant to think that they were in love. What evidence could be so glaring that the whole court would become suspicious that the affair was more than courtly in nature? Before he put it together in his head, Marlene's voice chimed in.

“Worry about the fruitfulness of your own marriage cousin. Leave me to mine. I have contingencies worked out, in any case.”

James rolled his eyes, “Of course you do.”

Sirius could have kicked himself. He’d been rather preoccupied and had somehow failed to consider the fact that Marlene could be with child.

“Your Majesties,” Sirius heard the stilted formal tone to his own voice and nearly cringed. “Do we have your leave to go to Father Hagrid? I’d prefer we get this in the church records so there will be no questions as to the honor of the Princess.”

“My husband and I are of one mind. Is Father Hagrid a trustworthy holy man?”

“He’s been my confessor since I was 15. I trust him with my life” James answered without hesitation.

“Very well then. There’s no time like now.” Marlene looked up and nodded.

Sirius was very happy, in this instance, to follow the Princess’s lead.

Sirius pulled his boots off as he sat down on Marlene's - their - bed, and sighed contentedly.

“I’m so glad that everyone protested my idea to marry you off just after you arrived.”

Sometimes words just happened to Sirius. This was clearly one of those times. Though his statement was entirely true the look on Marlene’s beautiful face as she reacted was proof that they’d been completely inadvisable.

“You… what? You wanted to marry me off? This was never brought to my attention! Explain yourself, Sir!” Her attempt to look very angry was admirable. But there was still a hint of laughter in her eyes as she chided him, and standing there in her underskirt completely undermined her faux chagrin.

“Don’t look at me like that!” Sirius smiled and stood to walk up to her. “It wasn’t some wicked plot and it was to my own brother!”

“Well believe it or not that does not make it sound any better from my perspective.” Marlene's face became wide with shock. “In fact it makes it a sight more nauseating.”

“Oh come on, Marly…” He wrapped an arm around her waist and slid the other hand along her cheek. “All I knew about you was that you were the strangest lady I’d ever met and you considered me the most handsome gentleman at court.” He smirked down at her. “It seemed like a kindness to marry you to a man who bares a strong resemblance. I wasn’t aware that you’d only have the genuine article.”

“You are quite lucky Sir,” Marlene snaked her arms around his neck and Sirius knew he was in the clear, “that you are so very handsome. I don’t generally think I’d be over fond of the touch of a man who wanted to have me as his sister in law.” She rolled her vivid blue eyes. Her bitten lips curled themselves just so, into a most captivating smile. Sirius pulled her closer. The look in her eyes was fast becoming addictive. He lifted her shift from the bottom to tease soft caresses up the outside of her thigh.

“Well it does appear that I am lucky then. Because you seem more than a little fond of my touch.”

She only nodded and took in a sharp breath. Her eyes were so full of want as he brought his lips to hers. When she practically melted into his kiss, he knew that he was more than lucky.

They couldn’t have been asleep for long when a messenger burst into the Princess’s chambers. This was highly irregular. Therefore Sirius had to assume someone was there to harm Marlene and prepare to defend her with his own life… while completely naked. He’d always thought he’d die with a sword in his hand, but he’d not pictured it quite like this. Life had taken a turn for the strange when Princess Marlene came to live at court.

“I am not here to do anyone harm! I’m just a messenger!” The man cowered as Sirius pinned him against the wall, sword at his throat. “Lady McGonagall sent me to collect Sir Sirius! She says it’s… about your family? That’s all I know. I promise. Please lower your sword and… put on some clothing?” He said the last of his plea in a hushed voice.

“If you even think about saying anything about this you will regret it for the rest of your life, do you understand?” Marlene interjected in a disconcertingly threatening voice for a woman who had been screaming bloody murder not a moment ago. Though she was still standing naked as the day of her birth, she held herself with such authority that she might have been wearing her cousin's own crown.

There was no time to think. Sirius’s head was spinning as he quickly dressed and, since there was no going back from this in any case kissed his wife goodbye as he followed the messenger. He was sure whatever news awaited him was grim.

#blackinnon #blackinnon fanfiction #sirius x marlene #sirius black x marlene mckinnon #sirius black #marlene mckinnon #medieval au #medieval fantasy AU #fake relationship au

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adelaideattractions · 5 years

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MAFS couples' infuriating final decisions

Despite countless warnings and protests, Married At First Sights cheating couple has shocked and irritated us all with their decision at a big fancy final commitment ceremony in foggy woodlands while in another patch of foggy woodlands across town, the shows annoyingly content couple has also irritated us with a gushy proposal and sponsorship jewellery. Sunday nights episode has two happy endings and this is clearly Nines attempt at making the show look more wholesome than the X-rated filth-fest weve witnessed over the past two months. Can those people who started that weird online petition against Mel Schilling start another petition banning Dan and Jessika from spending the rest of their lives together? Its not entirely clear if online petitions are prohibited from controlling peoples personal lives, but this is the internet and we make the rules up as we go. What a whirlwind! I never expected the twists and turns this experiment has brought! Jessika splutters to us on the sofa with her hair pulled up into a messy topknot, totally unaware she is personally responsible for all the the twists and turns. Last time we saw Dan, he was sickened by Jessikas drunken mean girl antics at the dinner party. He told us he saw a side of her that appalled him. The disgusting scenes were making him rethink his entire relationship. We rejoiced. Finally, he has seen the light! But he was lying through his veneers. Just minutes after Dan made those threatening comments, they had more window sex. We find them tangled in their rank sheets the morning after.

media_cameraOh Dan. I feel yucky after last night, Jessika splats. Its unclear if its the group fight she initiated thats making her feel yucky, or the nine carafes of house wine she ingested. Ah well. As long as you still love me, she splats at Dan while writhing around in their sweaty sheets. She stares at him. He stares back. Yeah, do you still love her, Dan? we splut, appearing in their doorway while eating fist-fulls of Froot Loops from the box. Remember how Jessika told Dan she loved him and then bullied him into saying he loved her in front of the entire group? Well, to use Jessikas language, hes now feeling yucky. They pack up their apartment and prepare to spend one week apart before reuniting at a private commitment ceremony where they will deliver their ultimate decision. Ill be moving to the Gold Coast with you, Jessika splats cheerily as she chucks all her crap in a suitcase. She hasnt actually asked Dan once if its OK to move into his house with his five-year-old son, and now its too complicated for Dan to bring it up. Weve only been together for a short period and shes already talking about moving to the Gold Coast, Dan whispers to us in a panic. Yeah, its hilarious you should move and not tell her, we giggle, while spitting Froot Loop remnants in his face.

media_cameraWhy so frustrated, Daniel? Meanwhile, Jules and Cam are being annoyingly content and we honestly couldnt be bothered. On the good side of the Harbour Bridge, Jules freaks out that Cam wont propose and, on the boring side of the bridge, Cam stresses about whether he should propose. Its #BoringContentPeopleProblems and we just cant relate. In an ideal world, Cam would propose and Jules would say no but since everyone started making online petitions about this show, producers dont wanna do anything fun anymore. Lets check back in with Jessika and Dan, who are back in their home environments and trying to find really polite ways of telling their families that theyre dirty cheaters. Im moving to the Gold Coast to be with him and Im really looking forward to it! Jessika spluts to anyone who will listen. Dan has a different take. Its moving bloody fast, he shivers, curled up in the corner of his Gold Coast rental. He heads over to his judgy mums house and, as expected, she judges. She judges her son for cheating. She judges him for hurting Tamara even though she hates her and judged her too. But its the announcement that Jessika will relocate from Perth and move in with Dan that his mum judges the most. She freaks out. Somewhere throughout Dans explanation, his mum has decided that Jessika is some kind of hobo who wants to take advantage of free food and shelter. Im concerned with her wanting to come to the Gold Coast, Dans mum tells us sternly. That she just wants somewhere to live and shes gonna take advantage of him. To live with him in his house and his son. Im a little bit worried about it actually. To summarise, Dans mum thinks Jessika is Joanne The Scammer.

media_cameraYoure sharp as a tack, Dans mum. Due to lack of other storylines this evening, we cross back to Jules and Cam. Hes in the woods. Its oddly foggy and Im pretty sure its machine-produced. She walks out of a fern and into the clearing, looking annoyingly content. She says lots of gushy stuff. He says lots of gushy stuff. All the woodland creatures that surround them roll their eyes. You make me so happy Jules. Will you marry me? he gushes. Yes! Of course I will! Jules gushes back. Ugh, original, a bitchy rabbit groans to a deer while Cam gives Jules some cruddy sponsorship jewellery. In a bush clearing across town, Dan waits for Jessika. Suddenly, her limo runs over a bitchy rabbit and pulls to a stop. I am so wholeheartedly, head over heels, unconditionally in love with you, she spluts to Dan. I will always be blessed so long as I have you in my life. Its the perfect set-up for a dramatic ending. We hope Dans judgy mums concerns about Jessika being a catfisher have freaked him out enough for him to dump her right here in the random jungle. Then, while Jess is crying, Dan can steal her limo and leave her stranded.

media_cameraMake ya mum proud, Daniel. Despite my feelings for you, I was really struggling with the lie we were living and the betrayal we were carrying out, he murmurs to her. Yeah, youre both terrible people! we yell down from a gum tree. It echoes throughout the forest. In the last few days Ive had a chance to think about our relationship and the impact it has had on other people. And also the impact it has had on me, Dan continues to grunt. There were moments I was broken and completely shattered at the pain we were causing certainly not how I wanted to start a relationship. It made me question if we could last as a couple He pauses and exhales.

media_cameraBrace yaself, Jeffika. Lifes too short to hide how you feel. I came here to fall in love and hope to have someone to take home and introduce to my son as my girl. I found that girl in you, he mutters. We did not see this coming, another bitchy rabbit eye-rolls. Dan makes out like hes going to propose to Jessika, but he stops short of saying the words and instead gives her a symbol of commitment. To clarify, its just another cruddy ring from the sponsorship jeweller. Dan was bullied into saying he loves Jess even though he doesnt. Then he was bullied into funding her cross-country relocation and allowing her to move in with him, even though he doesnt want that. And now he has been bullied into fake-proposing to her. Hes whipped. Lets hope Ning does something more interesting, that bitchy rabbit mutters. Yeah. Lets. For more observations on cruddy sponsorship jewellery and bitchy rabbits, follow me on Twitter and Facebook: @hellojamesweir Originally published as MAFS couples infuriating final decisions https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/entertainment/television/james-weir-recaps-married-at-first-sight-2019-episode-37/news-story/dfa03c9656adedb43e8f2aa64305130d?from=htc_rss

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sweetlifetownsville · 5 years

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To End The Year, A Mini-Magpie With A Mini Mystery.

Has mega-fraudster Craig Gore skipped Australia? And if so, why hasnt this been reported in the media especially since he is supposed to have made a midnight flit the very day after a judge refused to allow him to leave? In other matters, one has to admit that the Townsville Bulletin is consistent it has ended the year as it started, continuing its weekly Olympic-standard shambles. And Mongrel the Barrister has left us lawyer Mark Donnelly, the man who inspired a much loved Magpie character has passed away. and our final visit to Trumpistan for 2018. But first Its hard to keep a good man down, and our fav toonist Bentley is nothing if not a good man. Even in the holiday season, he casts his jaundiced eye over the news, and brings us a different and rib-tickling perspective. This week, he was much taken as most of us were with the drone drama at Gatwick Airport in the UK. A professional drone was reported in the airports approach and departure air space, and thousands of travellers were stuck when the whole shebang was shut down for a couple of days while the wallopers tried to go hi-tech and trace the source of the bastardry. Its not fully sorted yet, but Bentley thinks the drone may have already met its fate.

Why Arent All The Gore-y Details Available?

Will ye no come back agin, laddie? Now to our mini-mystery. On December 19, this report appeared in the Courier Mail. Judge denies disgraced former rich-lister Craig Gore request to travel overseas Vanessa Marsh, The Courier-Mail December 20, 2018 2:21pm A DISGRACED former rich-lister accused of ripping off almost $800,000 from investors has broken down in court after a judge refused his request to leave the country to visit family. Lawyers for alleged fraudster Craig Gore today launched an application in the Queensland District Court, seeking for the former businessmans bail conditions to be altered to allow him to travel to Sweden to visit his wife and children. But Judge Paul Smith denied the request, saying Gore faced a long time in prison if convicted and there was a real risk he would not return to Australia to face trial. Gore is facing 12 charges of fraud over allegations he swindled about $800,000 from self-managed super fund investors in 2013-14. He also faces three charges of managing companies while disqualified. Now that seems pretty definitive and eminently sensible. But The Magpie was informed two days later, by a regular contact and mate who has always been on the money in the past, that Gore went back to court the next day on another application, and had his passport returned so he could be with his family in Sweden at Christmas. He was to return in three months to face trial and possibility of a lengthy striped suntan. The Pies contact says Gore was on a flight out of Brisbane that night at 11pm, accompanied by a lawyer (that was apparently part of the arrangement) who will return with certain paperwork. Gore will be expected to make his own way back to face his fate in March. Yeah, right. Now all that is as it may be, BUT THIS SPECTACULAR REVERSAL OF A JUDGES IMPLACABLE DECISION HAS BEEN NEITHER EXPLAINED OR APPEARED IN THE MEDIA. Well, not that The Magpie can find, after days of searching to verify. If it is true, there will be a hell of a lot of very pissed off people Gores victims and the tireless investigators who nailed him who know just how long are the odds that we will ever see this shyster again. Shades of Skase!! Perhaps we will never know how this came about if it did come about because there will be a lofty judicial silence of unaccountability if he is a no show but surely the second hearing was an open court? Hard to fathom why it wasnt reported. Mongrel The Barrister Is No More The Magpies good mate Mark Sludge Donnelly the man who partially inspired the popular Magpie character Mongrel the Barrister, died in his family home in Cairns last weekend. It is fair to say that Mark was my best mate in the halcyon days of Portraits Bar in the Exchange Hotel all through the Noughties, the years when I was reporting court matters for the Bulletin. We were part of a memorable and disparate group, the bar crowded with our marvellously mixed group every Thursday, Friday and sometimes Saturday nights. (The fondly remembered Portraits became Poseurs Bar in the newspaper column and then in this blog.) Mark was universally known as Sludge, which he happily answered to, but never fully explained, even to me, its origins apparently it had something to do with a memorable comment from a lecturer or senior teacher suggesting Marks behaviour at that time some comparable to something from the bottom of a pond. Sludge was one of the wittiest people Ive known, and his memory was nothing short of astounding, not just for quoting legal precedents but in all things, particularly pop music. He always commandeered the music machine at parties, and was a pretty good DJ. He also had an eye for a well turned ankle, and his way of getting ladies to talk about themselves endeared him to more than one. Like many a member of the Portraits push, Mark liked a drink, and some believed he was a bit too enthusiastic in this direction. But I would say that rather than having a battle with the bottle, he just had frequent skirmishes with it, as we all did and any excess rarely affected his work at the other more sedate bar, where he often shone. Mark left Townsville when his father died, to live with his mother in the family home in Cairns. He didnt practice in Cairns, and went into virtual retirement, which was plagued by ill health for some time. He returned to Townsville annually for his birthday, but I lost touch in the past few years, for which I feel a bit miserable now. Sludge is now undoubtedly arguing the finer points about the Laws of Entry with St Peter for that is certainly where this witty, soft-hearted old friend of mine now is because we all know God loves a larrikin. Mark was 62. They Really Dont Understand Language at The Astonisher, Do They? And they even get the wrong WORD for a headlines. Even when theyre trying to make a pun, which kinda depends on the right word, yes? But we got a headline quoting some bizoid saying Townsville is bracing for a great 2018. Bracing for? Ahem. Youve managed to say EXACTLY THE OPPOSITE of what you meant. Heres the dictionary definition of bracing. verb[withobject] prepare (someone or oneself) forsomethingdifficult or unpleasant:both stations arebracingthemselvesforjoblosses|policeare braced fora trafficnightmare. So although this paper goes through life like a bouncing Hari Krishna whos visited the medicine cabinet once too often, giving us totally unquestioning, unexamined glop about our economy (usually from someone with a vested interest), it seem to have inadvertently hit on the truth here. However, the most tedious aspect of the paper of late is the dreary attempts at humour in headlines, particularly about crime, a subject no one in Townsville with the exception of you folks in Flinders Street, finds the least bit funny. AND EVEN THEN, LANGUAGE FAILS YOU let alone a sharp sense of humour.Take this major front page fail on Thursday.

Swindler? My dear headline writer, stay with me on this and read slowly, feel free to move your lips as you must. Now lets see, a swindler is someone who fiddles some unsuspecting victim out of something. That person would be called a fiddler, and if hidden in a ceiling, could be described as ta da a Fiddler In The Roof. You see, this would then coincide with the hit musical of the same name oh, how we would have all fallen about, clutching our sides in mirth, and holding your superior wit in such esteem!!! But swindler? Now weve just got a headache from smacking our foreheads yet again. And this one in simply NOT TRUE. This online

The actual number of people who said (or may have said, who knows, its probably a fiddled fantasy anyway) was 55% of the 700 or so people who responded to a totally uncontrolled survey. If there area 220,000 potential readers (ha! you wish) in the circulation area, the percentage is not even .5 of one percent. But we all know that the on-line edition is sloppy, so the paper itself will temper the outlandish claims, wont it? Errr no.

This is simply lying, and treating people like morons. And still they wonder But barely have we swallowed our anger before we start scratching our heads over weird genuinely weird stories like this, which would suggest that English isnt TEL boss Patricia OCallaghans first language, or she was suffering mild sunstroke when she was penned the media release from which the story was transcribed.

This story is selective twaddle certainly straight off an unedited media release from the Dudley Do Nothings, meaningless twaddle in which Ms OCallaghan specialises. It has often been said of her that she has the gift of the gab, and aint that the truth, just about all of what she has to say, in The Pies experience, is just that meaningless gabble that sounds good until it is more thoughtfully examined. Like this: The Museum of Underwater Art, located within the heart of The Great Barrier Reef, is a proposal based on the works of international sculpture and underwater artist Jason deCaires Taylor. Whats that bit located in the heart of the Great Barrier Reef? Has there been a Krakatoa-like geographic shift we havent noticed? The Underwater Museum, one of several planned along the coast, will be, at last report, just of Maggy Island, the GBR is a at least an hour or more away by fast cat . But in it goes to the story, with a newbie cub reporter just churning out this PR bumf. But wait, theres more. We then get this prize piece of meaningless gabble from the top executive charged with attracting and promoting tourism to Townsville: Its a project that is going to enhance the Great Barrier Reef experience and also educate visitors on how we manage and live with the reef everyday Ms OCallaghan said. That is absolute poppycock that is totally meaningless. And We? Bloody WE? FFS, girl, get a bloody grip. Insulting, uppity tripe from Ms OCallaghan and lazy, presumably unsupervised reporting (read: select all, copy and paste) by a very uncurious junior reporter (read: stenographer). Really, a monkey using scrabble board wouldve made more sense. The clusterfuck continues no wonder were so deep in the shit. Other matters As if golf didnt already have enough hazards.

Words of Wisdom From Two Funny Men

Frankie Boyle The cleverest quote of the week comes from the Scottish comedian Frankie Boyle in the Guardian. But first, his preamble touched a chord for The Magpie, who can vouch for it when Mr Boyle writes: The plight of the satirist, such as it is, is a compulsion to look at the grimmest, most important thing they can think of, and then for reasons that probably wouldnt survive a really good therapist, try to make it funny. To try to address the iniquities of their society, the satirist must manufacture some hope that what theyre doing might make a difference, then type it all up and send it off somewhere before they remember that it never does. Looking back over the events of this year is a bit like holding a doll for a therapist and pointing to where the bad man hurt you. Mr Boyles point is a universal one, which can be shared by Townsvilleans looking back over the past shambolic year. But his prize quote is so subtle, that you may have to think about for a while The Pie roared after a few seconds. The murder ofJamal Khashoggiby Saudi Arabia is another very difficult subject to find the lighter side of, unless someone in the Ecuadorean embassy has clipped the story out and stuck it to the fridge. (Sigh) Dear Mystified of Mysterton, it means that the Ecuadoreans might be giving their Wikileaks guest Julian Assange a hint.

Dave Barry The other funnyman worth a quote is the inimitable Dave Barry , the American columnist who talks about Florida the way The Magpie talks about Townsville only he is far funnier, proof being that The Magpie pinches more of his lines (many) than he does of The Magpies (none). This was his challenge to a graduating class, but it can just as well apply to the year 2019. How are you, Class, going to respond when the Clock-Radio of Challenge emits the Irritating Buzz of Opportunity? Are you going to roll over and hit the Snooze Button of Complacency? Or are you going to wake up and, after performing the Bodily Functions of Preparedness, boldly grasp the Toothbrush of Tomorrow? And no matter what you do in the coming year, make sure youre always politically correct, so no snowflakes will melt before your harsh words.

And So To This Week In Trumpistan First, compare Trump as Commander In Chief of real US soldiers, on his surprise visit to Iraq

Guess whos wondering if she packed the shampoo? with this.

And now to our final gallery of the year about the man Frankie Boyle described as this troll-doll King Lear, who looks like something youd pick off a baking tray after cooking pizza above it.

And Finally How The Hell ? The Pie has been occasionally upbraided for the use of naughty words in this blog well, one word in particular. He is aware that it can be confronting, but it is the other F word Frustration that compels him to sometimes resort to other for emphasis. Anyway, so what, if its good enough for Sesame Street, its good enough for The Pie. .. So that was the year that was, and what a rip-snorter we have coming up. Turns out this edition wasnt so mini after all. Comments run throughout the holiday break 24/7, so you dont have to wait to have your say. And the New Year will look even rosier for the old bird if you think the Nest is worth a small donation to keep it neat and tidy. The how to donate button is below. HAPPY NEW YEAR, YALL. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/to-end-the-year-a-mini-magpie-with-a-mini-mystery/

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hatnews3-blog · 5 years

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Ask Ausiello: Spoilers on Good Place, Riverdale, Timeless, B99, Resident, Million Little Things, Flash and More

Got a scoop request? An anonymous tip you’re dying to share? Send any/all of the above to [email protected]

Question: Got any Riverdale scoop? What’s next for Archie? —Kerri Ausiello: When we last saw Archie in the fall finale, he was dyeing his famous red locks and making a run for the Canadian border. Executive producer Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa won’t tell us who he finds when he gets there, but “he is headed into the Canadian wilderness, for sure.” He won’t be seeing his dad Fred in the flesh anytime soon, though: It wasn’t shown on-screen, but the EP confirms that Fred did make it back into Riverdale before the quarantine came down.

Question: Any Million Little Things scoop? My friends and I are obsessed with it and hope it’s back for another season. —Montreal4 Ausiello: Remember how showrunner DJ Nash said that everyone in the group of friends has a secret they’ve kept? Look for Regina’s to come to light in Episode 14.

Question: Any scoop on what to expect when Grey’s Anatomy returns? —Al Ausiello: I will have a special holiday treat for you this coming Monday, so sit tight. In the meantime, I tried to get showrunner Krista Vernoff to share even the tiniest bit of intel about Jennifer Grey’s mysterious character and… I struck out. “I can’t [say anything],” she responded. “Because it would really ruin a twist and turn that I don’t want to ruin.” Hmm… I’m sticking with my initial prediction: She’s Jo’s mom.

Question: Anything on The Good Place? (Janet, specifically.) —Whitney Ausiello: Everyone’s favorite not-a-robot will be forever changed by having the humans materialize in Janet form, creator Michael Schur teases: “The way to really have empathy for people is to walk a mile in their shoes, and she did, like, the inverse of that. A bunch of people walked in her weird body for a decent amount of time… so that is another contributing factor to her evolution.” He adds that the season finale “has some pretty wonderful ‘compare this version of Janet to the one you saw in the pilot’ kinds of scenes.” So enjoy, Janet fans!

Question: I’m glad Dorian finally confronted Kaleb about his feeding problem on this week’s Legacies. Can I stop worrying about MG now? —Susan Ausiello: I don’t think it’s ever safe to stop worrying about MG, but as far as Kaleb goes, it sounds like Dorian’s pep talk was just the beginning. “Kaleb has a lot of really big ideas, and a lot of opinions about how things should work,” series creator Julie Plec says. “Much like in the real world when a hot-headed teenager thinks he can second guess what makes the rules the rules, he’s going to have a rude awakening pretty soon where he realizes he doesn’t know as much as he thinks he knows.”

Question: The ending of New Amsterdam‘s fall finale makes me think that Max’s cancer is progressing quicker than first assessed. Will this affect the clinical trial Dr. Sharpe has gotten him into? —Malasha Ausiello: We brought your query to showrunner David Schulner, and he said: “While we can’t reveal here what happened to Max on that dock, we will in our first episode back January 8. But, you’re right to ask if this will affect Max’s clinical trial. It most definitely will. This setback will change a lot of things in Max’s life. And Dr. Sharpe’s too. Thanks for watching and caring and writing to TVLine about the show.”

Question: Will The Flash give us any more hints about what Nora seems to be hiding? —SSH Ausiello: Now that we know there is some sort of alliance with Eobard Thawne, you should expect “a flash-forward flashback episode” that explains “how all that came to be, which will be a lot of fun,” says showrunner Todd Helbing. “You’ll slowly start to get the pieces of info that you need, but there will probably be one episode where we explain how that all happened to get her to come back [in time].”

Question: Challenge: Make me look forward to the Schitt’s Creek holiday episode more than I am already. — Belinda Ausiello: TVLine’s resident Schitthead Charlie Mason promises me that, no matter how great your expectations are, you won’t be disappointed — the special totally “sleighs.” What’s more, he issues a warning that the episode reveals a potential stumbling block to Alexis and Ted’s rekindled romance that neither she nor we anticipated.

Question: I need to know two things about Timeless: First, will #lyatt have a baby? Two, is Jessica really pregnant with Wyatt’s baby? —Miwako Ausiello: In response to your second question, star Matt Lanter says, “We address that [in the series finale, airing Dec. 20]. We’ll find out.” As for Wyatt, he’s not suspicious of Jessica and her baby news. “We’ve seen Wyatt be blinded by love throughout the last two seasons, though, and this is nothing new for him,” Lanter says. “Inherently, he’s a good person with a good heart, and I think he has a hard time accepting that people he loves or cares about … wouldn’t be good. So I think it’s easier as an audience member to look at Jessica and go, ‘Yeah, she’s lying.’ But I think Wyatt is just more blind to things.”

Question: How many time periods will we see in the Timeless finale? —Amanda Ausiello: “There are two-plus time periods, I will say that, that we have not visited before,” showrunner Arika Lisanne Mittman shares, adding that the historical time trips highlight “ethnic representations that we have not seen before [on the show]. Both of these stories are things that [are about] lesser known historical figures. You get to meet some new people that you’ve probably never heard of.”

Question: I’d love a Resident scoop on Conrad/Nic. —Holly Ausiello: I hope you enjoyed the couple’s honeymoon phase while it lasted, because the back half of Season 2 will be “nothing but obstacles” for the pair, according to executive producer Todd Harthan. “In just about every episode, there’s a new one for them to overcome… and they just start stacking up,” Harthan says, adding that the couple will be especially preoccupied with the health of Conrad’s father and Nic’s sister. “It’s going to be a ‘hold on and hope that they make it’ kind of ride,” he teases.

Question: Any hints on how to solve the Blindspot episode title puzzle for Season 4? —Hannah Ausiello: “Oh man! We finally built a title puzzle this season that is legit very hard to crack,” showrunner Martin Gero answers. “I will say this: The puzzle is an homage to some our favorite TV series and how they title the shows. Figure out which, and you might be a step closer.”

Question: Creek’s death on Midnight, Texas was so awful. Please promise me no one dies in tonight’s episode! —Rina Ausiello: I cannot make that promise. But I can tell you that Mr. Snuggly makes it through OK. So that’s something… right?

Question: Got any red-hot Chicago Fire scoopage, Aus? —Gene Ausiello: I see what you did there and I’m… very amused. Well done. The NBC drama is planning some girls-only bonding time for Sylvie, Stella and Emily. “They’re going to go on a road trip to [Sylvie] Brett’s hometown,” showrunner Derek Haas previews. The episode will air the week of Valentine’s Day, “so we’re calling it the Galentine’s trip.” Before that, though, the show will explore Emily’s “attitudes towards dating, which are different than Brett’s, and I don’t mean LGBTQ,” Haas explains. “I mean more of what [Emily, who is bisexual] considers casual versus what Brett considers casual. All of those dynamics are going to be deepened.”

Question: March is far away. I want American Gods scoop now! —Rob Ausiello: Well, because you asked so nicely… Pablo Schrieber says the “antagonist and ally” relationship between Mad Sweeney and Laura Moon will be tested big time by his allegiance to Mr. Wednesday when the Starz drama returns for Season 2. The leprechaun’s destiny “is tied to [Wednesday], no matter what, but it’s also very thoroughly tied to her,” the actor says. “So Sweeney is walking the line, balancing what he owes Wednesday and what he’s realizing he feels in other places.” Hmm. Sounds a lot like we’ll see Laura kissing the Blarney Stone before the season’s over, am I right?

Question: Can you give us any Outlander spoilers? (Especially involving Brianna’s and Jamie’s meeting!?!) This is my first time doing this — hope I’m doing it correctly! —Carolina Ausiello: You did OK. I’ll send you some notes about how to refine your approach in a separate email. Regarding the question at hand, I turn it over to our resident sassenach, Kim Roots, who has seen the scene in question: “I have rather high standards for the huge moments on this show — the wedding night, the print shop reunion, etc. — and I was incredibly satisfied by how the father-daughter plays out in [episode number redacted according to Starz’s spoiler restrictions]. Fans of the book definitely won’t be disappointed.”

Question: Elizabeth and Henry on Madam Secretary are #couplegoals. Please tell me anything you can. —Mary Ausiello: An upcoming episode opens with the McCords taking a tango lesson. And one of them is significantly more skilled than the other.

This AAnd That… ♦ THE BLACKLIST: As teased in the Season 6 trailer, Red will spend some time behind bars after being double-crossed by a close confidant — but don’t count him out just yet. “He’s really been stripped of his superpowers,” series creator Jon Bokenkamp shares. “He’s disconnected from his resources, he may have friends who will fall away and he’s sort of on his heels, which is new for us.” But Bokenkamp assures fans that “if anyone could embrace the solitude of a cell and the experience of incarceration with open arms, it would be Raymond Reddington. We have really high stakes, but we also have some of the most fun we’ve had, as well.” ♦ BROOKLYN NINE-NINE: There will be one major.hilarious change when the sitcom makes the leap from Fox to NBC in January. “We’re allowed to bleep and blur [now],” series co-creator Dan Goor recently told us. “Fox had a no bleeping and no pixelation policy.” Now the gloves are off. “Some filthy, filthy things have been said,” added Terry Crews. “I had one [joke] where I’m ashamed. I’m actually very, very ashamed. It was so jarring that everyone was like, ‘Whoa,’ and we needed to regroup… But holy cow, we never heard language like that on the show.” ♦ CHICAGO PD: Burgess is not the only one who will have a reaction to Upton and Ruzek’s romance. In an upcoming episode, Jay “responds in a way I think you’d expect Halstead to respond,” showrunner Rick Eid teases, “and I think what’s going on in his head is a little different than what he says.” Eid also adds that Jay’s “relationship [with] Upton is interesting and evolving, so don’t sleep on that.” ♦ HOUSEKEEPING NOTE: This is the last AA of ’18 so happy holidays and all that jazz!

That’s a wrap! Please send questions, comments and anonymous tips to [email protected]. (Additional reporting by Kim Roots, Andy Swift, Dave Nemetz, Vlada Gelman and Diane Gordon)

Source: https://tvline.com/2018/12/14/million-little-things-spoilers-season-1-episode-14-regina-secret/

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onision-fucks-children · 6 years

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*Last Personal Rant About DKG*

Its a new year, so its got to be a new me right? 2017 me was crazy hung up on my ex fiance, he was somewhat emotionally abusive and my sheltered naive ass took that to be passionate love. It took all of this year and maybe a quarter of last year to stop being afraid- I was so afraid of everything. Every unexpected noise, everytime any man or boy looked at me, everytime some one raised their voice in public terrified me. The future also terrified me, I was terrified to look towards a future that didn't have DKG in it, I'm not afraid of that anymore. Whatever happens in my future is something I cant see nor control, whose to say 30 year old me isnt with 31 year old DKG?

But, I'm getting it all out tonight. Before the official first day of 2018 sets in, I have to leave behind the part of me that loves DKG (If I can). So below is everything I want to say, face to face, to the kid I once believed could do no harm.

"I'm sorry. I know weve been through this again and again, and I know I'm wasting my breath. You dont believe me, and with good reason not to. Ive lied to you, again and again. About little stuff. About big stuff. So let me tell you the ugly truth right now and maybe you'll trust me when I tell you that I feel so fucking guilty about everything that suicide is always on the backburner of my head.

After we broke up, I didnt sleep. I didnt sleep for 3 days, someone would basically force me to sleep for a few hours, and the cycle would continue again. This continued for at least 4 months, before it took a huge toll on my physical body and my mental state. This isnt an excuse by anymeans: During the period of time where my insomnia would not go away, my personality took a drastic turn. I gave up- I was sick to death of being the submissive quiet "yes daddy" little girl that people, including you, took advantage of. I did everything I could to shake that version of myself away: I started drinking w Kollin, and sleeping w Kollin. And his 2 (?) Friends. I started hanging out and smoking with HWK again (And yes, DKG, you were right about him. He doesnt care about me, or anything ever. But I think after every hurtful thing I did to you, i really dont deserve someone who cares about me right now. Maybe someday but not now). I was popping pills to stay up at night (To keep away the nightmares) and downing as much cough syrup as I could to fall asleep in the daytime. Eventually, as my horrible spiral of sluttiness wore down, I slept with SPG. I'm sorry. I think I've sent a million messages trying to explain my side of this story and its honestly pointless. I did it, I'm ashamed of it, I cant fix it. I should not have done that, and I deserve to have my head bashed into a brick wall. Or some other form of weirdly intense violence.

My halloween outfit was out of line and also inexcusable. The best explanation I can give you is...I'm clinically fucking insane. Not literally (Clinically depressed not insane but w.e) insane, just have no common sense. You didnt give me black eyes, you just ripped the core of my fucking soul out. No biggie. Emotional abuse is a lot harder to turn into a halloween outfit, ya know?

But you weren't 100 a bad boyfriend. In fact, a good 90 percent of the time, you were everything I wanted. And I stuck by you through a lot. When I caught you cheating early on in the relationship, when we went to jail together, all the moving we had to do. When you chose me over Amber. I was ready to give up seven years of my life for you, with zero hesitation. And I was willing to do all that because I loved your laugh, I loved the twinkle in your eye when you made a sly ass joke, I loved waking up to you, I loved everything about your ass. I thought, I fucking dreamed about marrying you, and thats on me. I should have known that we wouldnt last. You deserve happiness, and that wasnt me. Ive always wanted to see you happy, even when I fucking hated your guts at the end of the day, you were the one I was praying for.

I will always love you. I can't lie to myself about that, so I know I won't be able to lie to you about it either. You dont have to believe me and even if you believe me you dont have to care. I gave you all my love while we were together and I cant seem to find any love for a new person. You could break my arm, knock my slutty lying teeth in, bruise my cheeks, throw fucking acid in my face, and do everything else that I deserve to have happen to me for all the shit I did this year, and I would still want to be with you. I dont expect you to do anything about it, I cant force you to love me just like I can't force myself to stop loving you.

There, thats it. Thats all I have to say. I'm leaving this behind in 2017. I can't keep waiting for him to come back, I cant wish for him to even talk to me. But I can suck it up, instead of just faking it, and move on. Buy a few cats.

#stay away from dayton #dayton #my ex #fuck i miss him #but fuck him

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