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#ive been rotating this in my brain for over a year i have so many thoughts about it augghhh

pixelkip · 2 months

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You know what. Why do we as a touhou fandom not talk about the fact the pc98 songs are canon. They exist. In canon. Akyuu has them documented and has probably heard them. Someone within touhou's universe wrote them. Reimu could probably actually listen to her own theme. Were the songs actually written about the events of those games?? Was eternal shrine maiden written about reimu?? Was love colored magic written about marisa?? I'm going insane

#i could rant for hours about the fact there is a band in universe that apparently wrote them #thats mentioned in akyuus untouched score and pmiss #i might make a longer post about this eventually im just. obsessed with this fact #ive been rotating this in my brain for over a year i have so many thoughts about it augghhh #im just. honestly not super confident talking about my interpretations of obscure touhou lore #since im kinda worried that ill be wildly misinterpreting something #especially considering i cannot read japanese and translations arent always reliable #but god. i havent seen almost anyone talk about this and i think the implications are very very interesting..#touhou #touhou project

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sgtmickeyslaughter · 3 months

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once again, its been one hell of a wednesday

time to unwind with a weekly tag game!

thanks for tagging me @lingy910y @juliakayyy @energievie and @jrooc

name: gigi

age: 24

star sign: full time virgo

first language: english

second language: lol i wish, my girlfriend has been trying to teach me korean the whole time we've been together and cant comprehend that my brain is just simply not wired to learn language

favorite lip product: aquaphor 🥰 and the nars laguna lipstick it was literally made for pale autumns

the best food dish you can make without a recipe? honestly most things, even when its new i like to skim and freestyle, most often i make eggs in hell and various soups, stews and stocks

if you drink tea, what kind? the only tea i drink is bottled cold green tea, and ginger in hot water when im sick

if you drink coffee, what roast do you usually get? light roast <3

favorite thing to watch on youtube right now: music videos! also watching a lot of book binding tutorials and general quiet crafting videos

favorite thing to watch on youtube in 2012: the dame herself ms. jenna marbles and honestly up until she left it would be the same answer

favorite item of clothing right now: i have a few very very cozy sweaters that have been in rotation over the last few weeks, but i am very excited to get back to soft loose blouses and pants

favorite item of clothing in 2012: a very cool 70's jean jacket that i still own and wear!

fandom

three movies you recommend: Chungking Express, jennifers body, in bruges

your favorite concert: tyler childers at radio city music hall, the queen of dancehall herself sister nancy and tune yards

have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion? not a single opinion, we can agree to disagree on things but i have unfollowed people for consistantly being really negative about everyone other than their favorite characters and just overall being a bummer

have you ever left a fandom because of the fans? Nope! every fandom I've been apart of has had really lovely people, but by far shameless is the nicest which feels a little ironic

the best tv show you watched last year: Beef by far, I don't think Ive ever resonated with a piece of media with such raw emotion (also the bear and succession but yall already knew that)

do you have a fancasting you just can’t let go of? Im not really apart of the harry potter fandom at all but sometimes marauder fancasts come on my fyp and theyre all really fun

a ship you’ve abandoned: destiel a little, i still love them that brain rot (damage) cant be undone but i rewatched supernatural last year and like, Dean is so genuinely unkind to him most of the time (/nuanced)

on a scale of 1-10 how willing are you to share your ao3 history? i mean, with who?

do you have a fandom tattoo? no tattoos

what fandom do you wish was bigger? none come to mind

has a finale ever ruined a show for you? no honestly im pretty okay with all of them, but i never watched any of the big ones that people hate

have you…

swam in an ocean? yes! I was a jr lifeguard, swimmer and water polo player in highschool, i am the safest person to visit the beach with

been vegan/vegetarian? I was vegan for three years but when i moved back home during covid i couldnt really keep it up while eating dinner with my family every night and now im very plant based but not vegan or veg

gone skinny dipping? many times lol

gone skiing? yes but i prefer snowboarding

been to a convention? only work related design conventions

tagging from my notes: @mickeysgaymom @rainbowbri @anonymous-galager @gallawitchxx @iansw0rld @mybrainismelted

#sgt says #tag game

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ghostenluvs · 4 months

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my little sister's rewatching s3 despite Also watching it yesterday and its just. so funny to me. like first off bc the fight against nine is paced like a rpg boss battle (which. nine also talks like an rpg villain so that tracks. he just keeps spawning minions and saying things like "you fools. bring me sonic")

also nine is just so. rotating him. id put him in the microwave but i do not think that would end well for anyone. BUT HES LIKE. "well i tried caring and it just got me hurt." and hes just so so scared of being hurt again, so he cuts everyone off and hurts the people he wants to care about him. bc he cant let anyone get close. robots are the only ones he can depend on, they won't turn on him because they can't. and he HAS to believe that sonic betrayed him, that sonic wanted to hurt him and never really saw him as a real person or cared about him, because if he does then he has to confront that He is the one lashing out. etc etc etc. i am one of those goopy eyed white grandma dogs and nine is the squeaky toy i am furiously shaking around and disemboweling.

ok so yes all of this.

nine just keeps doing such edgy boy anime villain in the background of a tvshow cover poses during this season.

nine is like. so cool to me. squeezing him like a stress ball. patting he on the head and giving him a nintendo switch and a hot chocolate. blasting a character analysis of him through my headphones at an irresponsible volume.

i have so many thoughts about him. like. so many.

most of them [many of them, not all] are like.

"hey nine is like [insert other character here] but [insert adjective here]" sort of. and like comparisons or situations and such.

for some reason after i realized "hey nine is like elsa but boy and technology" my brain immediately went: ctubbo dream smp

and i couldn't figure out why.

and then my brain went:

"hey nine is like ctubbo if he never had someone to lead him around places and just entered his 'ive been traumatized must build incredible technologies to defend self' phase wayyyy early."

so yeah i'm insane about him. because ive somehow made ctubbo connections to tails and nine now. [tails prime also he is like disc era-l'manburg ctubbo in my brain]

because like. he's a kid!!!!! that's a child!!!!! bro is like 8 years old!!!!!

he should be having beef with jessica over the swingset seat at recess!!!!! and instead he's getting horribly traumatized and left alone to deal with any injuries or fears on his own, feeling there's nobody else in the world like him and not seeing sunlight for years on end.

oh gee i just had more ctubbo nine thoughts dang it.

[tommy valueing the discs over tubbo even in the split second of an arguement and not meaning it really / sonic taking about the original people and green hill like he was this whole show despite the huge care he has for everyone in the shatterspaces]

IM NORMAL I PROMISE.

#sonic the hedgehog #<!3 answers #sonic prime #dsmp #nine sonic prime

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ninjasmudge · 6 months

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[slides in]

hope youre doing well, this is your excuse to talk about something you've been waiting for someone to ask about, any topic

THIS IS YOUR FAULT FOR MAKING ME THINK ABOUT TRANSFORMERS AGAIN its one of my favourite franchises bc there are really NOT MANY characters who i am neutral on or dont like. ive singled out dozens of tf characters over the years to be the fave for a bit and rotated them in my brain for a few months, its actually easier to list the characters that i dont like than the ones i do. i do have some favs but theres stil like. 10 that i couldnt choose between. probably soundwave, sunstreaker, ratchet, vortex, deathsaurs, tracks, steeljaw (rid), spinister (idw), perceptor, fort max, skywarp, thATS MORE THAN 10 ALREADY BUT U GET IT

i actually have 5-6 a4 notebooks just FULL of transformers drawings, little comics of g1 episodes and character designs and stuff, its all from a few years ago before i started digital art but i should really redraw some of it bc ill never get tired of transformers.

and actually, i was wondering what to draw today so MAYBE some transformers stuff. i loved g1 for how absolutely insane it was, ive never seen a show with so many lines said like jokes that were just. not jokes and usually made GENUINELY no sense. not sure i ever laughed at a joke in that show but i do remember being in literal tears over animation errors, wild lines, weird noises, and plotlines that make no sense whatsoever. do not watch g1 with hopes of getting it, but i do watch it to laugh at the show itself

#there ARE characters i dont like but then its USUALLY mostly fandom interpretation #like i love g1 starscream but did not like secretly super selfless super smart super 'sassy' way hes sometimes portrayed in fandom #in my opinion you need to let him be genuinely a little dumb he cant win every argument i didnt like windblade comics starscream that much #him being secretly a super good leader for all of cybertron kind of contradicts nearly every piece of canon on him and it felt kinda ooc #i can see why a lot of ppl liked it bc it was very in line with hard done to fanon starscream and if thats what you enjoy then massive w #i have nothing against that but considering canon starscream it felt very ooc to me but i also wasnt invested enough in the storyline #-at the time for it to annoy me or anything #i also didnt really like rodimus or first aid but i just think first aid is a lil boring #and i just didnt like how the narrative framed rodimus in mtmte he was objectively kind of a bad leader and he DIDNT really improve #but i dont think any of this ruined the atory for me and thats pretty much it for negative controversial tf opionions #p much every other character i like or REALLY like #i blow up soundwave in my mind in every single franchise i love him #tfa bee was my first favorite transformer tho bc like AS AN UNDIAGNOSED EXTREMLEY ADHD KID I WAS LIKE 'MOOD'#i loved prime but i legit refused to accept anything bad happened to breakdown he was one of my faves #and i think i will redraw some of my older tf comics now #man i had a bunch of prime designs for different characters like jazz and sunny and sides i might revamp #ask #hi sorry ik u asked but this was so much SDRFGHDSH

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stevethehairington · 1 year

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🌿🍭🤲🧿

hiiii ty for sending this in!!

🌿how does creating make you feel?

so so sooooo good. like, when the words are flowing well and this tiny lil idea i had once is now turning into this fully fledged thing, it's just like. idk kind of magical. like I made this. I put these words down, in this order, and made these things happen. and I made people feel that thing because of it!! that's a powerful feeling!!

🍭why did you start writing?

because i had a story to tell! i had a story i wanted to fix, i had a story i wanted to continue, i had a story i wanted to create. i've always been good with words in the creative sense, and i've always enjoyed writing little stories as a kid. so it's only natural that that translated into my teenage and adult years too. it's fun to me, it gives me a creative outlet, it's something to do, it gets me validation lol.

🤲what do YOU get out of writing?

so much!!! ive said it a few times now but it's my creative outlet! it gives me a space to like explore concepts that rotate around my brain, it's something i can project my hopes and dreams and wishes onto, it's something i can channel my feelings into. it gives me a sense of accomplishment, when i finish something, and it gives me validation when i post and people like it and comment on it. writing has also given me some of my best friends, too. through it i've met so many wonderful people, and i've made some amazing connections and i will ALWAYS be grateful for that.

🧿what steps do you take to not take things personally if a fic doesn't do well, or if your writing/posting/sharing experience isn't going how you'd like it to?

ha. hahahaha, yeahhhh this is a tough thing to do sometimes. like. ough. okay. ngl i am actively trying not to take certain things personally when it comes to writing. lol. it's hard! it's hard because, like, there's no explanation for why things are the way they are or why people say certain things or why people flock towards one thing over the other. it's hard not to make that (most times false!) connection that it has anything to do with you/your writing.

the best thing i can think of to do in these situations is to a. give yourself some distance and b. find someone you trust that you can talk to about it!

stop looking at the ao3 stats page, don't look at how many notes your post got, close that fic that isn't doing too well, take a break from that server that's bringing you down, unfollow that person that's saying things that are making you feel bad. like, you have to take care of yourself! and sometimes out of sight, out of mind is the best way to do that. and then finding someone you can talk to also helps because like sometimes you just get really in your head about things, and you need someone who had an outside perspective to remind you that it isn't like that, and that you are still good.

for things that aren't doing as well as i'd like them to, i also like to remember that, like, i am writing for myself first and foremost. so if other people don't like it, that doesn't matter. because i like it. and i know this is a lot harder to do than it seems, trust me, but like if you keep repeating that to yourself it does start to set in. ALSO, instead of focusing on how many people aren't reading it, i focus on how many people have read it. 20 kudos is still 20 sets of eyes on your work!! and like if you think of it like youre sitting in a room and 20 people come in, that's gonna be a crowded room! that's a lot of people! and THOSE people read your fic! THOSE people liked it! so like, focusing on what you have been given instead of what you didn't get helps.

let's get REAL - fic writer asks

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rosecasket · 1 year

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🧍‍♀️hand over ur oc lore 🤲 (they do not have a hand sticking out emoji)

OH GOD IVE DUG MY OWN GRAVE OH SH—

okay so i have way too many ocs and most of them are just scattered around my brain like little marbles with barely any lore actually written out for them but. i’ll talk about elijah and prophet because they’re the ones that have been rotating in my mind recently.

so, elijah nolastname is 20-something years old and very depressed coming out of an extremely toxic relationship. mans gay as hell and also a huge wreck. at some point he gets approached by a Very Pretty Man (long red hair, green eyes, has a tattoo on his right hand). the pretty man kind of just invited himself to the coffee table that elijah is moping at and introduces himself as Prophet.

which, you know. red flag. if anyone comes up to you and introduces themselves as just “prophet,” you should probably back away slowly. but! elijah is too busy being homosexual and red is his favorite color anyway. they talk, prophet makes elijah laugh for the first time in months, and everything ends with them exchanging numbers.

after a while, they start dating. and that’s when shit starts getting weird! prophet reveals that, surprise surprise, he’s the leader of a cult religion. their goal is to summon back the “true god,” that has been trapped in a realm above heaven by the current, “false god” that everybody worships. this information is very slowly revealed to elijah bit by bit, and at the end he ends up so gaslit by everything that he actually starts believing in it.

elijah gets introduced to the definitely not a cult cult. he works with them, time passes, and prophet suddenly announces that they’re ready to finally release the true god from its shackles, and that elijah shall be the vessel for it to communicate until it becomes strong enough to leave his body. the ritual goes on with even elijah, who has been pretty indoctrinated into the whole thing, having second thoughts. and then prophet suddenly pulls out a dagger and slashes him open. you know. as you do.

something enters elijah’s body. he blacks out, and when he comes back, everyone who was in the room, except for prophet and himself, are dead. and that’s when the fun, living with a horrible demon creature in my body part starts.

this is the very very basic details because i can’t write out everything i have and also i Suck at recapping my ocs stories so. yeah </3

eli and prophet have a huge hannibal/will graham thing going on and they’re very messed up. good for them

#asks #i’m so sorry this is so long and also probably doesn’t make sense

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dvskfallen · 2 years

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[ david harbour. cis male. he/him. ] did you see CHARLIE SWAN wandering around town ? they’ve been in forks for [ forty-eight years ] so they should be used to the storms. word around town is that they’re [ 48 & a human. ] people either describe them as [ responsible ] or [ reclusive. ] there seems to be no in-between. well, when i think of them i picture [ a fresh piece of cobbler, a shiny police badge & sitting on his favorite recliner while watching the latest game. ]

charlie swan is a townie through and through. and though he might be happy to call forks his home, he didn't always envision himself planting his roots here. an only child, charlie spent most of his childhood over at billy black's, running around with him, quil atara iv, & harry clearwater. his childhood was a happy one, but he always pictured himself going to his parents' alma mater : washington state.

even with an acceptance letter in hand, charlie couldn't bring himself to go. with his parents' health deteriorating, he decided to stay home. though he debated applying for the local university, he chose instead to apply for the local police department. the hours and proximity made it a bit easier to be there for his mother and father.

it was around this time when he met renee. she passed through forks, only staying for a handful of days. yet, he found himself absolutely smitten by her. she was romantic and impulsive. being around her felt like a rush. when she returned, swan convinced her to stay. soon followed a proposal and even sooner they were wed. for a short while, they were happy.

they were overjoyed when renee learned she was pregnant. his life felt full, and then the health of his parents took another shift. between being there for his wife, parents, and working, he felt himself spread so thin. but he tried. when isabella was born, it's like he could feel the center of his universe adjusting once more. he always wanted a big family.

when renee left with bella, he didn't try to fight for their marriage. he didn't want to make it hard for the two people he cared for more than anything else. a part of him regrets it to this day. instead, he poured himself into his work. he climbed until he became the chief of police of the small town.

when bella moved to town full-time, charlie was thrilled even if he had a difficult time expressing that.

fun facts :

charlie is by definition a creature of habit. his hours of work are consistent. he has about three different meals he rotates when he cooks. if he goes out to eat, he wants either a steak or a burger. if he's not wearing plaid with jeans, it must be some sort of special occasion, etc.

i'm gonna ignore canon in regard that charlie really tries to push jacob and bella. he's supportive of whoever bella wants to be with. his bigger worry is he doesn't want her to possibly rush into things.

that being said, charlie definitely calls edward many different ed-names. which is ironic, because charlie only has good things to say about the cullen family.

any washington sports team ? charlie is supporting them.

one time one of the deputy's secretly signed charlie up for a dating app. it stressed him out so much, he has not been on one since.

within the last three years, charlie has began volunteering at the local community center to teach fishing.

wanted connections :

this man is so oblivious to the supernatural. your muse can befriend him, under either good or bad pretenses.

perhaps someone who works at the local diner that charlie has become acquainted with ?

extended family ?

i do have a romance wanted connection on the main 👀

idk i'm down for anything. it's just four am so my brain is fried lol

#* intro .#evenfallhqsintro #* introduction / charlie .

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nethervox · 2 months

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tag ppl you want to get to know better

tagged by @heavensw4rd

tagging no one in particular bc im shy o_o but if any oomfs see this n wanna do it u can say i tagged u ok? <3

ITS LONG SORRY here is a read more

LAST SONG: athena - nova twins ✧ pulled from my most recent liked songs bc i dont listen to that much music,,

CURRENTLY WATCHING: dungeon meshi ✧ ITS SO FUN, the anime release finally got me off my ass to start reading the manga. ive gotten through the first 4 volumes so far but now i wanna give the anime a bit to catch up to that point before i read any further

THREE SHIPS:

Linhardt/Mitsue/Fray - "who the fuck are those first two" well they are from my brain <3 linhardt is my wol who was drafted into being gods silliest soldier and he is coping w that very well. smiling. mitsue is my other wol but they dont have the echo, they were born in a wet cardboard box all alone. poorly socialized hydrogen baby. genuinely itd take so many words to describe what the deal w these three is that i do not have the space for here. i am so normal abt them

Marcille/Falin - havent gotten that far ofc but from what i have seen + ooc later panels (bc nobody tags their Fucking spoilers) they are doing crazy things to each others brains. women SHINE 💗✨💖💞

Shulk/(A)lvis - they are so **** coded its not even funny. i need to watch xb1 again actually its been ages

FAVORITE COLOR: (posting from my purple blog with my blue/purple sona and my purple phone) i like pink :3c

CURRENTLY CONSUMING: i had coffee w a beso, it had pineapple jelly in it :) idk what im gonna have later tho, theres not that much here... instant ramen sweep i guess

FIRST SHIP: girl idk. mario/peach??? i drew a comic abt them in my journal when i was six. i probably still have it buried somewhere in my closet. can you tell im not that big into shipping actually

PLACE OF BIRTH: texas 🧍

CURRENT LOCATION: still texas but a diff part of it now, as of last november. dont care for it.

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: CELIBACY 💃💃

LAST MOVIE: lotr fellowship of the ring ✧ watched the extended edition over discord while i worked and got very little done that night. movies are cool i think

CURRENTLY WORKING ON:

updating refs for art fight like i said i was gonna do last year (i am still putting it off at this very moment. please yell at me to stop that)

rotating a new oc who is a possessed suit of armor. its like if a colony of mold decided to be a person. my little silly

#nether.txt

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sugar-and-spite · 9 months

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hey i hope this isnt weird with me being a total stranger but i saw your post in the tag about ocd + adhd and not knowing if that’s a Thing and i just thought i would send you my two cents, since ocd + adhd is apparently exactly what i have! in my case i got diagnosed w/ ocd first and then adhd (inattentive type) a year later. i know chances of misdiagnoses are very high from what i have read and talks ive had with both my ocd and adhd specialists, particularly misdiagnosing ocd as hyperactive adhd. but i really can tell you that i definitely definitely have both. i can read about either one, about the unique symptoms/experiences with technically no overlap, and just go “exactly exactly exactly” every line. adhd meds work wonders for helping me feel grounded and focused but does nothing to control my compulsions, while ocd therapy has been so effective for overcoming some of my obsessions but does nothing to mitigate hyperfixations, etc. it feels like i kind of have otherwise textbook cases of both, except for the fact that i just happen to have them together (ain’t life fun)

speaking completely from my own experiences, i will say my adhd tendencies and my ocd tendencies usually feel pretty separate. i would describe it spending most of the day dealing with adhd stuff with ocd moments peppered in lol. but i feel they do interact in some ways. certainly my adhd makes my worst ocd compulsions more difficult to deal with because it can overlap with bouts of hyperfocus that makes it VERY hard to stop. my adhd also makes erp therapy plans (i.e. exposure-response prevention, standard ocd treatment) harder to stick to consistently due to executive dysfunction, plus my weird rotation of more minor ocd obsessions and compulsions that come and go at varying levels of intensity almost like hyperfixations. my ocd in turn affects my adhd hyperfixations by making my engagement with them a bit compulsive at times. basically it feels like adhd and ocd are two little guys in my brain pointing at each other saying “i can make them worse” lol

obviously i cant diagnose you over a tumblr ask or at all nsgshshs im not a professional myself or anything, i also don’t know if this will even sound relatable because adhd can present soo differently and ocd can entail so many different kinds of obsessions and compulsions but i thought it might help to share my experience at least in case it’s at all helpful. good luck and stay well out there!

thank you so much for this!! honestly hearing from other people has been the most helpful thing for me with this, my brain has been trying to convince me that i can't possibly have these issues, and it's harder for that to make sense when i hear so many people saying they deal with the same stuff lol

i totally understand what you're saying abt them making each other worse - i feel like some of my obsessions have stemmed from forgetting things due to adhd, and then overcompensating and becoming obsessive over not forgetting. i also have BFRBs (body focused repetitive behaviors - skin picking in my case, but hair pulling is also common) and i've read that those are common with both adhd and ocd. i was on stimulants for a while for my adhd and fatigue, and while they helped those issues immensely, they didn't really help the picking at all, so i wonder if that's because stimulants don't usually help ocd?

anyway, this isn't weird at all and i really appreciate hearing other people's perspectives 💖 it makes me feel like i'm less alone in my brainweirdness!

#rey rambles

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yonkimint · 3 years

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So Show Me, I’ll Show You

Part 28.1

This part has written parts with pictures in between.

Previous — Masterlist — Next

TAGLIST (send me an ask or leave a reply if you want to be added!): @esteemedsalt @halesandy @historicalgigi @seaoffangirling @secretlycrazyhummingbird @kiwimash12 @aviwasabi21 @sehun096rainbow @darkskin-buttercup @rainfallingfromthesky @yoongiofmine @lucedelsole97 @pleasegivemearemedyyy @kim-jias-den @unadulteratedlyunique @thesweetest-peas @joyfullyobsessed @irishhbamb

When the door to your hospital room swings open, you groan in relief. Finally Jimin was here to jailbreak you. It was great having Lauren, Heeji, and Luna here but they are dutiful bulldogs and you can’t blame them. Your last visit to the hospital had left them pretty traumatized.

Your hopes fall when a man in scrubs steps into the room instead. You had seen him once or twice but you had never exchanged words. In fact, the only reason you remember him at all is because he is white and you thought that was odd, considering you were in a Korean hospital.

“Oh hi,” you say, uncomfortable, when he just stands at the foot of your bed. His head is bowed so you can’t study his face too closely but his presence puts you on edge. He doesn’t respond to your greeting so you push on, trying to keep your tone nonchalant, “The nurses just did their rotations and I’m doing fine. Did you need to check something?”

He laughs. A low throaty laugh that has haunted all of your nightmares. Your hands fist around hospital sheets as a cold chill runs up your spine. Swallowing around the lump rising in your throat, you peer closer at him.Mark’s hair is black. This orderly’s is ash blonde. But everything else… you suck in a sharp breath.

“Hello, y/n, did you get my flowers?”

He lifts his head and all his sharp features suddenly come into focus. He has been here the whole time watching you try to recover from injuries that he perpetuated. He looks pleased. And his pleasure makes you want to claw his face off.

“Go to hell, asshole.” You try to sound menacing, to hiss these words like poison, but they only come out a weak, fearful wheeze. Mark clucks his tongue at you.

“Look at you, y/n, trying to be brave when you’re really nothing but a weakling. A cowardly little girl. You would be nothing without me and you know it. You don’t really think you’re going to fight me, do you?”

There’s a glimmer in his eye and it makes you so angry. But the part of you that has endured his abuse for years is still the stronger part and you feel your anger give way to hopelessness. Mark is right. You won’t fight him.

“Good girl. Now, we are going to go on a little field trip, okay?”

You shudder as he steps around the bed and traces the IV still in your arm. You had been waiting until the last second to remove it so the nurses wouldn’t suspect anything if they walked in but now you regret that choice. Mark has no intentions of being gentle with you.

He presses a palm against your mouth, smiling vindictively as the fingers of his other hand loop around the tubes that have been delivering your medicine and fluid for the last few days and yanks the whole thing loose. You whimper into his skin as blood splashes from your open vein.

“How are we supposed to go on a field trip when any camera is going to catch you dragging me out of this room?” you ask him, hoping fleetingly that he hasn’t thought of this. But he’s been here for who knows how long.

“My little writer,” he coos, snatching your phone from your lap and slipping it into his scrubs pocket, “You really do try to think of everything that can happen, don’t you?”

You glare at him. You have taken abuse from him all these years and still, it’s the patronizing that sets you off every time. And he knows he’s pushed the right button too because he laughs and pats your cheek gently.

“Oh my sweet little y/n, the field trip is right here in the hospital. I’m going to roll you out of here in that wheelchair,” he says, pausing to point to the wheelchair that sits in the corner of your room, “and we’re going to go down the hall. And you’ll do exactly what I tell you to because you know that I have your phone which means I can either let you say goodbye to your friends or make them think that you never want to see them again. Your choice!”

This is so cliche, you think, hobbling out of bed when he gestures for you to get up, like something out of a stupid soap opera. Disguises himself as an orderly and kidnaps me right under everyone’s noses. God damnit.

Your field trip brings you to a supply closet on the third floor of the hospital which, conveniently, is under renovation. You can’t help but think that Mark is following this cliched script just to piss off the writer in you.

Now that you’re out of sight of the cameras, he has tied your limbs to the chair so you can’t run away. A gag sits roughly in your mouth and cuts against the corners of your lips. Mark is circling you as if deciding where he should start.

Lauren told you that he threatened to do so much worse than put you in the hospital next time he found you and you let your eyes flutter shut in defeat.

You choose not to think about that. Instead, you let your memories play like old movie reels on the backs of your eyelids. Heeji’s art galleries. Lauren’s photo shoots. And Luna’s ridiculous seances every full moon.

You stifle a chuckle. No need to bring on Mark’s wrath any sooner than necessary.

And then, newer memories begin to play and a lump rises in your throat. These ones aren’t supposed to be tinged with melancholy. These are supposed to be the memories of starting over. The memories from after you are safe.

You swallow hard.

The flight had already taken a lot out of you. This was just the cherry on top of a totally stressful, life changing ice cream sundae. At least this coffee shop seemed safe and warm while you tried to figure out if you were going to be homeless or not.

Seoyun, the barista, had been kind enough to give you the WiFi password so looking up your address shouldn’t be too difficult. Still, you lowered your head down on the table with a sigh of defeat. Seoul was so confusing.

“Oh, I know that look,” a voice sounds above you. Your head snaps up, eyes narrowing, already distrustful of a friendly stranger in the heart of South Korea. He smiles at you and his perfect rows of white teeth are so familiar, you already feel your tense muscles uncoiling. He presses on, “it’s not your first day in Seoul, is it?”

You glance at your luggage and back at him, remembering Lauren’s texts to go find BTS. As if the butt of some cosmic joke, it seems that they have found you instead.

You roll your eyes at him, “what gave it away?”

He glances down at your luggage too and laughs. You study his face carefully so you see the exact moment he makes a decision that will alter the course of both your lives.

His hands are full with two trays of coffee and he shoves them down on your table without asking. You raise an eyebrow at him, not really surprised by his boldness but somehow taken aback all the same, but he only flashes his brilliant smile, the corners of his eyes crinkling with the force of it. He sits down.

“You look like you don’t trust yourself to breathe. Like you’re trapped in your own brain or something,” he comments.

You lean forward, reminding yourself to calm the flare of annoyance rising in your chest before you speak. “Jimin,” you say evenly, “do you think you can just sit here with a complete stranger, flirt with her a little bit, and she’ll open up with her whole life story?”

“It’s always worked before,” he chirps back, batting his eyes, that same heart melting grin never wavering. But you see it there behind his gaze. No one has ever called him out on this before and you smile.

“I sincerely doubt that…” you say, trailing off as his hand darts out for the phone you’ve left on the table. You gasp, your reflexes too slow to catch him now, and he giggles swiping through as many un-password protected screens as he can.

“Well, I sincerely doubt that you know where you’re going since you’re sitting in a random coffee shop with all your luggage so, out of the kindness of my heart, I’ve decided to help you find your way,” he says, handing the phone back and gesturing for you to unlock it for him.

Your insides are screaming not to do it. You have to keep a low profile or starting over is going to fail but the earnest look in his eye has you wavering. With a sigh, you unlock the phone and you feel it deep in your gut, everything is over before it’s even begun.

It didn’t really matter what Mark was doing to torture you, just that he was and the pain was excruciating. You had heard a rumor once that after a certain point, the body would stop responding to pain but you were sure now that that was a lie. This was endless.

Your eyes start to roll back when Mark claps in front of your face again. You blink back into focus and your whole body is screaming for relief. He’s looking at you like you should say something to him but you can’t speak, the gag still firmly in your mouth, muffling all your screams.

“Can’t have you dozing off, my favorite little writer, you’ll miss the best part!”

You quirk an eyebrow, inviting him to give his little villain’s speech. He obviously wants to follow the soap opera script so you might as well let him follow it to its natural conclusion. He grins, tracing your jaw line with something icy cold. A knife?

No, you tell yourself, don’t think about that.

“You’re probably thinking how cliche this all must be. The hospital disguise. The hiding in plain sight. You’re probably even thinking that since we stayed in the hospital, it’s inevitable that I will get caught. Which is true. The question is if it will happen before or after I kill you,” he says, “And maybe the more important question is this: why did Mark do this to the thing that makes him all his money?”

The thing? You would spit on him if there weren’t a gag in your mouth.

He leans close, his eyes boring into yours. “And the answer is really quite simple. You disgust me. You think you’re so talented and so clever. Everyone adores you and bends over backwards to care for you and what do you really need protection from? Your big, bad manager and publisher?”

He’s going to keep ranting, you know it, and you don’t want the short time you have left to be spent listening to this tirade. They say it’s normal to disassociate under trauma and so you do, falling into your memories again.

Namjoon had warned you about Yoongi before you even stepped foot in the studio. It still wasn’t enough to stop the way your heart dropped down into your stomach when you caught a glimpse of him in the hallway.

You had told him after the fact that you didn’t remember this moment but the truth of the matter was, it was impossible to erase this memory from your mind. With all the steel you could muster, you met his gaze. Dark, critical eyes stared back at you, soft pink lips pressed into a thin, annoyed line.

You offered a gentle smile like it was an olive branch, your knees wobbling while you waited for him to roll his eyes or storm away. But his eyes only widened, those annoyed lips parting in a small ‘o’, color rushing up to dust his round cheeks.

It made your knees knock together and you ducked your head. What was that? Forget it. If he was going to refuse to meet you, you weren’t going to waste feelings over it.

The next memory spills into recollection almost on top of this one.

Would it be okay if I came and listened to what you’re working on? you texted Namjoon.

Jungkook and Hobi were arguing about who got to be Luigi in the next race. You chuckled to yourself, amazed for the billionth time that you had somehow been invited to hang out with these boys again. You had already known they were incredible but actually interacting with them was overwhelming. They were as wonderful as they had always seemed from afar.

Even, you thought, Yoongi. He had extended a truce but he was still frustrating to no end. What did he mean you could never be friends? He was obviously capable of being friendly and you knew the way he cared for and protected his group members. It shouldn’t sting so much that he didn’t want to be YOUR friend but what could you do?

“Y/n, I curated a meme just for you,” Tae whispers from his place beside you on the couch and you startle when he pushes his phone into your hands.

“What the hell, Tae?” you burst out laughing, trying to make sense of the chaotic picture before you. He starts laughing too, satisfied by your reaction and takes his phone back. You punch his arm lightly and mutter, “you’re so weird.”

Let me ask Yoongi, your phone chimes. Your stomach surges with some feeling you don’t understand. You remind yourself that you’re just going to hang out with Joon. This has nothing to do with Yoongi and yet…

How is he supposed to become your friend if you let him keep avoiding you?

He says you can’t talk but you can come in.

You’re out of your seat before you have time to think about it more. The boys look up at you in surprise and you announce that you’re gonna hang out with Namjoon a bit before you challenge them to Mario Kart. The look of fear in Jungkook’s eyes sends you into another fit of laughter and you pat his shoulder.

“Don’t worry, Kookie, winning isn’t everything!”

“Yes it is!” he groans as you walk away.

In the studio, your stomach starts to dance again. Yoongi doesn’t look up from the scratch paper he’s scribbling on but you can see the way his fingers tighten around his pen. He is as aware of your presence as you are of his. When Namjoon points to the spot on the couch beside him, it takes all your concentration not to trip over your own feet.

You scold yourself for this silly behavior. There are more adoring members of this kpop group to be mooning over. Mooning over? You are NOT mooning over Yoongi. Who said that? Not you.

Anyway, whatever it is you’re feeling, Yoongi has done nothing to deserve it. So why do your eyes keep landing on him as you survey the room?

“I don’t like that lyric there,” Namjoon says, “maybe we should move it down into the second verse.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes but it’s softened by the small smile playing at his lips. He and Namjoon must have been going back and forth over these lines for quite some time. You watch as he scribbles out the words and moves them lower down the page.

His eyes meet yours and the hairs rise on the back of your arms. He doesn’t look upset that you’re there and that’s almost more unsettling than him insulting you. You press your lips together and search for anywhere in the room to look but him.

The phone in your lap will have to provide distraction enough. You pick it up and fiddle around between home screens but there’s nothing as interesting there as what’s happening before you so you listen in on the lyrics they’re crafting while you pretend to text the girls.

Of course, when you find out the song is for E.L. Penn, you spiral. You knew your worlds were going to collide if you stuck around long enough. It’s never been a secret to you that Namjoon was a fan of her work — your work — or that they would have worked with her on the movie if she hadn’t gone on hiatus.

But you are just an English teacher in Seoul and not the recipient of this song that is making your heart hurt. You can’t believe Mark would hack into your Twitter account just to set this in motion without you. He’s trying to push your buttons and it’s working.

So you do the only thing you can. You call Lauren.

When you return to the studio, Namjoon is gone. You knew he would be since he passed you in the hall while you were still on the phone. Yoongi looks up at you in surprise but you only offer a curt nod before beelining for your spot on the couch.

The tears spill out before you can help it and your phone buzzes with a text from Yoongi. You feel stupid as you read his stupid question through blurred vision. You respond sardonically and toss your phone onto the couch.

When he tells you you’re killing the vibe, you almost launch to your feet and run out of the room but Yoongi stops you. You stare at him, mouth gaping open like a fish.

“You want to what?” you ask, wondering if he’ll scold you for talking out loud to him.

He reaches for his guitar instead, a sleek, black stained acoustic that you’ve seen in several lives from before you actually knew him. He strums the chords lightly, the sweet sounds discordant in the small space. You blink at him.

“It’s something I’ve been working on,” he says vaguely, “I’m just curious what you think.”

“Why me?” you ask, confused. He frowns at you, his lips puckering and little dimples appearing in the corners of his cheeks.

“Just be quiet and listen, okay?” he asks it like a question but you know he’s giving a command.

You smile at him a little too sweetly and then settle back into the couch, pulling your legs up to your chest, so you can rest your chin on your knees as he starts to strum. He rolls his eyes at you but there’s a smile in them that you’ve never seen directed at you before.

Your stomach makes that weird lurch again and you finally resign yourself to what you are feeling. Butterflies. Min Yoongi is giving you butterflies.

221 notes · View notes

luminous-shifting-vibes · 3 years

Text

*sequel* to actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server

once again, it's out of context because x1000 funnier

also x1000 longer than previous post

"ur satan is gnc af"

"Bestie I’m already having gender envy over a fucking demon please"

"O_O ODEPIJHFbavevisdpvfhzdcnjawedsidjksjdkoeirjfmkdsoeirujdksodifjndmksoidfjdksidfj ITS" NOT IN MY FRAFTS IS SPEDNT 1 hour PN THAT SHIT"

"AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"ohoho sexy"

"I am very proud of myself"

"himbo x edgy fuck"

"YOU COULD SQUISH HES CHEECKS"

"he has teefs"

"SQUASH"

"good for biting 📷"

"he's a himbo basically"

"B͂̒̄iͫ̍̈tͧ̓ͯè̄̇"

"bifth"

"i havent watched blue exorcist in years but mr okumura my beloved </3"

"MY LIFE QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED"

"is it important information to mention that the person i put up for my turn is the son of satan" "I know like 1 thing about everyone who isnt ranboo lmfao"

"crimes"

"tumblr sexyman"

"idk why but my first thought was cowboy onceler"

"I vibe with him but he is very long and twisty"

"steampunk e-girl"

"steampunk tumblr sexyman"

"Canonically bi crimelord I agree!!"

"OOO FRIEND SHAPED"

"ARTIST SIGHTED"

"they look like someone i would want to be friends with but is way cooler than me so i'd never actually talk to them"

"babby..... would die for him"

"honestly i probably kin him"

"i'm sure he's lovely but he looks way too much like my ex i'm sorry-"

"i'd be down for another rotation! i have another twink to show y'all"

"Also :00 blonde friend"

"Let us all infodhmo"

"Hsjagdvbs shhh im on phone"

"Nix woukd you like to joon?

"skitters away"

"I have two braincells and they both drink dumb bitch juice"

"oof wait whats the order again i have 0 memory"

"i want to bond with him over cosplay-"

"Awkwardly watches in band kid"

"One day I'm gonna a broadway star"

"which isnt to say they were bad. they were just fortnite dancing during rehersals"

"I threw it so hard my glasses flew off and slid under the stage right divider"

"anyway heres my boi"

"emo"

"haha emo"

"virgil sanders kinnie"

"he looks like he listens to my chemical panic at the fallout boy"

"Bro I bet he'd kick my ass with his deck"

"bird man my beloved"

"fuck i had so much to say and then i forgot it all"

"Birds!!"

"guiguhuh"

"crabrave"

"She sounds like someone I would end up stealing her personality"

"yess name collector gang"

"alias glass aiden haven absinthe fish brick rice"

"But I have Cypress, Remure, Genesis, Lemres, and Comet"

"And she's named after a mars candy bar bc alien"

"Hey, if plato went by plato, you can be king thief"

"im not dissing my gramma like that shfojd"

"My dad has seven legal names" "bitches be like *looks at fictional character* *steals their name* it's us we're bithces"

"coraline lowkey traumatized me but i adore it regardless"

"mmmmmm magic man :]"

"°0° green man"

"criminal (affectionate)"

"he would shoplift a candy bar from walmart and then brag to all of his friends about the sick stealing he did"

"despite the fact he's canonically been capable of overpowering a minor deity"

"i would commit so many crimes for him"

"Very babey"

"Yes please tell green man he is very pog"

"he also keeps a lot of dumb secrets"

"but I will sorely miss the chaos and energy of this here chat until I wake again" (by request XD)

"i just say words and if they're funny then they're funny"

"* or extremly chaotic either works"

"at this point we are just taking turns rambling"

"oH--"

"bc my brain has a schedule"

"Hopefully they have gyoza there or I will lose my mind"

"hehe yes spooky man"

"my ghost glucose guardian"

"the head of the undead group that lives there, and we end up dating. (yes I date a ghost, no I will not be taking constructive criticism /lh)"

"ghosts r just inherently sexy"

"i mean im becoming a squid thing so"

"Raven quirk raven quirk!!"

"ł â m p"

"łæmp"

"mothman: ooh lamp you look very nice today! do you come here often? mothman: wait shit no"

"I'd date a ghost"

"mine is still accurate, i am still sobbing (/j)"

"p e e p e e"

""@nick wilde is a tumblr sexyman" is the best thing i have ever seen"

"im sorry im cackling like a dying hyena"

"you're all 12 year olds"

"PEENIE"

"He once caused global warming on accident so he could get a tan"

"god, what a himbo. i love him"

"that reminds me of my friends kin assigned me jesus"

"Man outside of battle be like: princely crying but then in battle hes like: "CATACLYSM! DISASTER! DEVASTATION!" Chill out man"

"Every time I talk about satan it never fails to shock people it's my favorite thing to do"

"im kin assigning him roman sanders" ""Oh yeah he caused global warming because he wanted to get girls" "he what""

"oh damn i forgot satan was straight"

"twink appreciation club"

"give us the twinks"

"my first thought was bottom-"

"so many people to try and get his dad to love him"

"daddy issued"

"OH MY GOD ITS WILBUR"

"Big boy but"

"anyways janus is swagggg"

"........................."

"gib twink"

"give twink then i will share"

"holds him gentle like hamburger"

"This dumb bitch opened a book that said "do not open" and got possessed by a little bastard"

"he is. fragile creachur"

"klug is beauty klug is grace i would let him step on my face"

"If I'm playing swap and I have to hear one more "Pwanet Powew" Im gonna lose it"

"Who is to blame? Pandora or the box?"

"Bakugo isnt my type but I respect the drip"

"i say like my type isnt long-haired pretty boys and girls that look so gnc that people have a history of confusing them for men"

"hes a gremlin and i can appreciate a pretty gremlin"

"that is to say i am attracted to VFlower vocaloid. This is a confession."

"note i am a lesbian"

"You may like Schezo wegey"

"why does he have one single expression"

"soul soul eater passes the vibe check"

"magic wand"

"I Want To Hold His Hand"

"i would commit a war crime for him any war crime idc which one"

"my favorite one is when he sounded rlly gay because he said "Muscular bodies keep me satisfied""

"p e a n u t"

"Klug is a homophobic homosexual its just facts"

"grug from the croods is peak male performance"

"jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair Ahem, you look very lovely."

"tag yourself im the fireworks shooting from the top of the head"

"i like essays"

"central time gang"

"11:11 pog-" (wait... is that a suprise angel number?? yes it is lovelies just for you <3)

"Then again im also a dumbass bitch who wonders what the souls in soul eater taste like. SERIOUSLY THOUGH. THEY LOOK TASTY AS HELL!!!! LIKE GODDAMN BRO YOU'RE MAKING ME FUCKING HUNGRY. Like. that shit- it's Bone Apple motherfucking Teeth. hell yea my guy. Im hongy now.... shlorp I'm seriously considering this. Like. They seem kinda like a liquid? But a solid? Are they like jello? The fuck they taste like my guy???? I keep imagining they're like sour, like sour candy maybe? Or do they taste salty? Sweet? Maybe some combo of two? Do they even have a taste or is it about the texture? The sensation? God my mouth is watering what the hell. I am starving. I think I need to go get a cookie. I'm gonna go get a cookie. Brb. I'm better. I'm still craving souls though. Which is a weird-ass cringey thing to say but I'm being dead-ass rn. They just.... look tasty???? And I wanna eat one. Thus. I am shifting to Soul Eater for the express purpose of satisfying my fucking cravings. enjoy"

"points were made"

"jello? more like helloooo schloooAHFJDSDAIDWNALDHSJKDAIDANDM"

"WAIT I THINK I HAVE AN ANIME GIRL BITING VIDEO TOO"

"anime girl voice: mmm! mm... ahhhhmp!! mmm, mmm... aaahmp!"

"i think it sounds great i'm going to start eating like that"

"several people are typing"

"do these look edible to you"

"forbidden gummies"

"when I was on lsd I couldn't eat my fruit gummies because I thought they were alive because they had little faces on them"

"oh shit yeah don't do drugs"

"anyways general consensus is puyos are edible, ty for your input everyone"

"everypony is a word so powerful it can bring nations to its knees"

"pls the self control it's taking me not to say "hewwo everypony" in gen chat when someone new joins-"

"hewwo evewrypony uwu deaw cewestia i hopwe it doewsnt wain owo"

"ive cooked up a sowution wiwth the knowwege ive acwued. they say a kitcwen time saves niwne, but im just savwing two. Ive gathewwed the inwedients to make a time sowbet. Thewe's hawdly woom fow seconds when the seconds mewt away."

"I had a ten year old sister... you know what happened to her??? very sad, very tragic... she turned eleven....."

"NIIICE"

"Guts dont say the secks word :( /j"

"watch your fucking language in front of the president"

"im so sorry lumi"

"i think you're like ehhhh 8/10 funny"

"now me???? 10/10. Hilarious"

"sometimes i have to take a step back and remember that this is the same guts i follow on tumblr /lh"

""ok every here's some good shifting advice!!! uwu have a good day" "yeah i did lsd and ate fruit gummies""

"i have one setting and it's whatever this is"

"my bitch ass cat just pushed the door open with his fuzzy face and now my sleeping dad is being lulled into dreams by Cosmo Sheldrake's 'Pliocine'."

"me on discord: nick wilde"

"me on tumblr: shifting water! haha funne! me on here: my hermit crabs are cannibals also i want to eat souls."

"im sorry yOUR VIBESA RE JUST SO DIFFERNT"

"u give off older cousin ive never spoken to but always admire at the family gatherings vibes"

"what the fuck"

"BC I HAVE LIBERTU"

"If you adopt me then yes"

"am I qualified for dad jokes???"

"we're all a lot smarter on tumblr"

"I'm like "awww... sweet... sweet little shiftlings... posting such sweet shiftling content... so pure, so wholesome... does not even know abcs....""

"can't think before you speak if you never think B)"

"I'm not responsible enough to be a mom"

"cat pet"

"show us pictures of the cat or i will do Crime"

"maybe thats me being a coward tho"

"MOTH!!!! MOTH MY BELOVED"

if y'all want I can make this a series bc shiftblr keeps giving me more content

#tw drugs #tw swearing #tw cannibalism #tw crime #tw food #tw homophobia #shitpost #out of context #out of context quotes #lumi's quotes

33 notes · View notes

eyesforjade · 4 years

Text

Underestimate — Jill Valentine X Carlos Oliveira [Resident Evil 1 and 3]

Summary:

underestimate

verb

direct transitive

not giving due esteem, value or appreciation to; not having a lot of consideration; disdain.

"s. someone's intelligence"

direct transitive

miscalculate, for less.

"s. the demand for a given commodity"

Five times a man underestimated Jill Valentine, and one time one didn't.

Author’s Note: Hey there, this was an idea I had while I was listening to “Boys Will Be Boys” from Dua Lipa. The result made me really happy, and was something I really liked writing, although, I’m very insecure about it, because, I translated to english, but english is not my mother language, hey, I’m Brazilian, just as Carlos in my future AU’s. Well, stay tunned for my other works, and I hope you guys really like this.

Word count: 3841 words.

Warning: Maybe for my bad english, but besides this, there’s some points where the character’s lines are sexist, and there’s also scenes of shooting in the characters.

Also available on ao3

i. dick valentine

Jill vaguely remembers having a day with her father, even though he wasn't training her skills. She was a smart girl, and she knew very well what her father did for living, and even though she didn't think it was right, it was the only thing she had, knowing that her mother would never return to her life, especially because of her father.

Dick Valentine has always been very hard, he wanted his daughter to follow in his footsteps, because he knew how much capable she was. But all the pressure to learn drove Jill crazy, and often missed the things she did. At the time, Jill never understood, but now older, she understands that he underestimated her many times, so that she was better at what she did.

And that's why when he saw the opportunity for Jill to join the S.T.A.R.S., it was when he started getting heavier. Days and nights in the clear, a lot of pressure, Jill worked hard that year, got a lot of injuries in the process, but it was from that she managed to achieve more things, Jill learned to live and it was all thanks to him.

But she never denied that it was a heavy childhood. The training was intense, but it taught her things she never forgot, like that day in her teens, when Dick trained her on how to deftly break into a home. “Only fools accept the obvious and go no further; use your brain, Jilly”. That same day, they had a fight, and Jill will never forget her.

— You can do it, Jilly. — He said that on average at least 30 times a day, and Jill was tired of hearing that, dropping the lockpick gear, she turns irritated to her father.

— If I can do it, why do you keep demeaning me?! — Jill always thinks about what she will say, and that day she was just tired.

— Because I want you to be better! — Hearing that from him, at that moment, was something that ended the training for him. He stood up, dropping her in front of the lock. — Better than me. — Jill spent the rest of the day trying to perfect her skills, she didn't want her father to have to talk to her like that. Never.

Δ ii. brian irons

It was another normal morning at R.P.D., everything was very calm. All corridors were with as little noise as possible, except for the whispers about the special ceremony that the S.T.A.R.S. were organizing. The captain of Alpha team, Albert Wesker was organizing a shooting competition between the two S.T.A.R.S. teams for training, and it was obvious that for incentives, he had a huge trophy for the winner, second and third place medals, and medals of participation for the other places.

As the event was entirely focused on S.T.A.R.S., they organized on their own, and participated, while the other policemen watched and cheered for whom they preferred. The event would take place outside, at the entrance to the west wing, there the two teams were divided and being led by their respective captains, Wesker and Marini. Enrico ordered his team to make sure that all weapons were good and ready for the competition, while Wesker, ordered his team to assemble the entire structure of the competition, and as a perfectionist, he wanted everything perfect.

When the lack of duct tape to stick the targets is over, Wesker sends Jill Valentine to get more. It was a simple task, which he had forgotten to do and he says to Jill, that he had left some boxes of tape on his desk in the office, she does not complain when she receives the task, she just turns to smile at Rebecca Chambers of Bravo, and go looking for it quickly. She was already close to the office, just another corridor, entering the door to her left, she immediately smelled the coffee that the office always carried.

With a smile on her face, Jill begins to approach the door to Wesker's small office, listening to the door she entered close. Albert was right when he said that the box of tapes would be on his desk, Valentine takes four tapes, thinking it was too much, but it was better to be left than missing, heading for the exit, when her hand holds the handle, she hears some voices outside, voices that were speaking about her, Jill grips the knob tightly, not turning it.

— Seriously, a little girl like her? — She soon recognizes the voice, Brian Irons, the chief of police, Jill takes a deep breath, being as quiet as possible, did not want them to know she was there. — Is that what you're rooting for?

— I think she has a lot of potential, Irons. — It's impossible not to recognize Marvin Branagh's voice, he almost never talks to her, but it was nice to know that he thought she had potential.

— If we were placing a bet, you would lose. — Jill is silent, trying to hold the hurt that burned in her chest. — She won't even come in third, I don't know why Albert admitted her to Alpha... — Valentine remains silent, hearing the voices fading due to the distance. She swallows hard, trying to get it out of her head, leaving the office as soon as possible, heading back to the west entrance.

Jill could say that the shooting competition was one of the worst disasters of her life. She wasn't at all motivated after hearing Irons say that, and she blamed herself a lot for letting it take over during the competition. Be in line with the rest of the S.T.A.R.S. waiting to receive his participation medal, it was one of his worst nightmares.

He was in the middle of Barry and Joseph. Barry had stayed in fourth place, while Joseph secured himself in sixth, Jill knew that fifth place was a good position, but the words of that filthy man, circled her head, while she practically stared at the floor. She had seen Irons whisper among some policemen, making them laugh, and that discouraged her even more. Chris had won the trophy, and she couldn't be happier for it, but she also really wanted to get out of there.

That day, Jill learned her lesson. She would never let any man say anything bad about her, ever again. She left R.P.D. without speaking to anyone, whispering: "your happiness is worth more than winning a stupid competition".

Δ iii. barry burton

Walking around the mansion had a bizarre mix of feelings. Jill liked quiet places, and the empty mansion by itself was a perfect place for her, except that almost every corridor had a new surprise waiting for her, zombies, crows, and the insecurity of opening a door, and finding one more. STARS member dead.

Jill had a lot on her mind, and the new area of the mansion made her unsure about things. She had just put a cylinder inside the machine that would make the underground elevator work, the four buttons lit a red light. Pushing the buttons, even in the most obvious order, hadn't worked, and Jill becomes impatient when she sees the cylinder come out again. Examining the cylinder, she can see that it had a sequence of numbers, but that the two parts did not meet.

Rotating the top, she discovers the sequence. “IV II III I”, with a smile on her face, Jill puts the cylinder back in the machine, pressing the buttons in the same sequence, glad it worked. The sound of the elevator, which was held by very visible chains, reaches the floor she was on, and she walks to him, analyzing the buttons on the panel, she hears the sound of the door she entered opening, and soon recognizes the voice that called her name.

— Barry?! Thank god you're safe. — She leaves the elevator, approaching the older man.

— You too, Jill. — He starts looking everywhere, like every other time that Jill had found him. — A noise I heard brought me down here, but... — He enters the elevator, Valentine followed him, watching his movements. — I didn't expect to find a place like this. Have any idea as to what might be at the bottom? — Barry asks, while Jill continues to analyze the panel.

— There's only one way to find out. — She says confidently, pressing the button. It didn't take long for the elevator to reach the bottom, they weren't sure what was there, but they heard a strange noise. Barry pulls out his gun, looking around intently.

— What the hell is that sound? — Jill starts to analyze the place, the caves under the mansion were certainly huge, it would take a while to check all that. — It could be a person. — What Barry said next made Jill question Burton's character. — Jill, go check it out. We have had enough surprises for one day. I’ll stay here, and secure our escape route in case something happens. — Valentine was totally against the idea of spliting up, she thought if they were together, maybe they could find Wesker and Redfield faster, but she also didn't complain when Barry sent her to check, she was part of the S.T.A.R.S., she didn't have to refuse to do something. It was her job.

Entering a door near the elevator. Jill had to face a woman, or what was left of one, her body had become monstrous, and now she couldn't even distinguish the woman's monster anymore. Valentine couldn't help but be sad, everyone in the mansion was a person, and they were alive before that.

Facing her, Jill discovered it was her making the noises. Knowing this, she had to go back to Barry, and maybe, that would mean they could walk through the caves together. When she got back to where the elevator was, her heart sank, Barry went up with the elevator, leaving her right there. She was sad, angry, and that only motivated her to continue, and get out of there, why did Barry act strange?

The next time they meet, Barry looks surprised to see her. His look was one of despair, fear, he seemed much more nervous than the other times they met. Jill had been through many things since that meeting in the caves, had returned to the mansion, and placed the emblems at the back of the stairs. Seeing Barry again, made Jill unsure, about trusting him again.

When she found him, he was touching a stone structure, it looked like a coffin. He was holding his gun, and as she started approching, he turned to her, placing the gun behind his back, as if he was trying to hide it. He acted as if she hadn't seen it.

— Jill! Are you alive! — Jill approaches him, in silence, watching his movements, Burton looked really nervous. — I was worried, because I thought you were ... — “Dead? After you left me there?” Jill thought, anger was all she felt, Barry had underestimated her.

With a quick movement, Barry points the gun at Jill. Reacting fast, Jill manages to execute a maneuver, disarming him, Barry was distracted, in other situations, he would never have let him be disarmed, Jill holds the gun, pointing at him, she was tired, and couldn’t believe he had aimed the weapon at her.

— Start talking! — She says, her anger increased more, every time she thought about everything that was happening. And then, she decided, no matter what, she would come out of that nightmare alive.

Δ iv. albert wesker

The mansion incident was something that would forever be remembered in the memory of the five S.T.A.R.S. survivors. Being inside that office, which was once lively and cheerful, left them really agitated and insecure.

The mansion had been blown up. Probably to prevent them from having concrete evidence of Umbrella's guilt about all of this. They only had some evidence, files, that they had taken from the mansion. Much of it was brought in by Chris and Rebecca, who lead with the mansion's things together, Jill carried some she found during her time there, Barry, while having to side with Wesker, contributed some too.

But there is one that Jill will never forget to read. She took it from Albert's body, after Tyrant killed him, it was a pocket diary, which he was updating while they were trying to survive in the mansion. About Redfield, he said that Chris was already suspicious, and it would be a long time before he found out the truth. About Burton, he had written that he was the weakest link, because he had family, and he could use that against Barry. About Vickers, well, it was just him thanking the fact that he was a coward, because he didn't have to get his hands dirty to lure us to the mansion.

About anyone from Bravo, there wasn't much, just that he imagined they were already dead by then. But about Jill ... He had written that she was a skinny, good detective, and had already left R.P.D. suspicious of him, but for him, she would be an easy target, and it would be the first one he would kill if she got in his way.

Jill didn't want to count this as a victory. It was not the time, especially after so many casualties. But she had survived, and he hadn't, and it shows how much she wasn’t an easy target, Valentine was sure it wasn't done with Wesker, and she was going to take Umbrella down now.

Δ v. nicholai ginovaef

During the outbreak of the virus in the city, Jill obtained refuge and support from a man named Carlos Oliveira. It wasn't much, but it was a start, even though Valentine didn't know how far her confidence should go, since in less than 10 minutes, she found out that Oliveira was with Umbrella, or almost.

Umbrella had sent a platoon to save the survivors from the outbreak. Jill met the U.B.C.S. platoon captain, and even though she didn't want to trust them, she wanted to help civilians as much as they did. So, following Carlos' requests, Jill was on her way to the subway substation.

Going there, she passed a garage in a car repair shop. Where she found a man... A soldier, dressed in clothes similar to those of the U.B.C.S. injured, without thinking twice, Jill approaches him, who was propped up in the car. His injuries didn’t appear to have been made by zombies. Jill experienced zombie bites, and that one definitely wasn't one. The injuries were more like a melee attack from someone alive.

— You’re U.B.C.S.? — She begins to analyze her injuries, while the man looks desperately at her.

— Yeah. C-careful, careful. — Jill gets lost in her thoughts, it definitely didn't seem like a bite, who could have done that to him? — Come on, don't look at me like that, alright? I'm not infected!

— Okay, let’s take care... — Suddenly, the soldier starts to say “no” quickly, and all Jill could do was see the gunshot directly through his head, leaving Valentine slightly scared. She gets up, looking at the bald-haired man, dressed in a U.B.C.S. uniform, looking at the body of the soldier he had killed. — What the fuck!

— He was infected. — His accent was strong, similar to Mikhail's, Jill looks at him in disbelief, unable to believe what the man had just done.

— He MIGHT have been infected! — The man laughs, turning his back on Valentine, it was surreal, Jill followed him with her eyes.

— Are all S.T.A.R.S. this soft? — He laughs, starting to walk, he walked fast, as if he wanted to get out of here fast, Jill takes his step following the same. — No wonder so many of you are dead.

— And what are you? — Jill confronts, the same stops walking, he had started up the stairs, and to look at her. — U.B.C.S.? Killing your own people? — He goes down a step, approaching Jill's face, as if he was trying to intimidate her, Valentine doesn't give in, she looks at the man with the same intensity, no man would intimidate her.

— He would have turned. — He smiles sideways, making fun of her, Jill feels her fists clench in a tight grip, he had no mercy, he seemed to follow his own rules, even if Commander Victor was in charge of the U.B.C.S. — Where's your sense of self-preservation? — He laughs dry, and goes back up the stairs. — Go back to the subway station. We don’t need a bleeding heart like you getting in the way.

Jill is left alone again, she was sure that this would not be the last time she would meet him, but she realized that she would have to be careful around him, because she wouldn’t die in Raccoon City.

Δ vi. carlos oliveira

When Jill arrived at the helipad, she saw Carlos lying on the ground near the helicopter, she imagined the worst. She had stayed behind, to put an end to the tyrant who pursued her during her stay in Raccoon City, and asked Carlos to go after Nicholai and the vaccine, see Carlos' fallen body, made her think the worst.

She runs over to him, crouching down to try to feel a pulse in his neck. She soon hears footsteps approaching him, and she sees Nicholai, who kicks her, without being able to react quickly. She recovers quickly, trying to pull the gun, but she is soon disarmed by another kick from the man. He had the vaccine in hand, and a gun pointed at her.

— You’re not going to stop me. — He shakes the vaccine in his hand. — Promised you this, didn't I? — He throws the vaccine at her side, and Jill tries to reach it, only to see it being shot by Nicholai.

— Do you have any idea what you’ve just done? — She looks at Nicholai, who had a sarcastic smile on his face.

— Don’t know. Don’t care. — He shrugs. — My client ordered me to reduce Umbrella to rubble. — When the robotic voice announces that the missile is only 10 minutes away from reaching the city, Valentine's heart is racing. Nicholai smiles, looking the same. — Ah, the missile has launched. And this is my cue to leave. — Jill was still on the ground, she hadn't gotten up, afraid the man would rush over and shoot, but she knew he would probably kill her now. — Goodbye, Miss Valentine. A shame you didn't listen to me when you had the chance.

She feels safe when she sees that Carlos' body was no longer in the same place. She was happy, happy that he hadn't died, but afraid that he was fighting Nicholai now, trying to disarm him. Despite the shock, Jill turns her attention, and reaches for the weapon she had lost earlier. Aiming at Nicholai, who was now surrendered by Carlos, Jill takes a deep breath, looking at Carlos.

— Jill! Shoot him! — Hearing Carlos say that, made Jill insecure, she knew she wouldn't be able to shoot Nicholai without hitting Carlos.

— I can’t! I'll hit you! — It was an idiotic moment for this, and Jill knew it, but at that time, she remembered Iron’s comment on the day of the competition, and how much it affected her, if she couldn't hit the targets there, how could she hit him without hitting Carlos?

— Shoot! You have to! There's no other way! — Jill tries to aim with all precision, her shaking hands didn't help at all. — I trust you. — That was more than an incentive for her to pull the trigger, hitting Nicholai in the chest, making him fall to the ground, and consequently, Carlos too.

— Carlos! — Jill approaches him, lowering, part of her worry leaves her, when she sees the smile on his face.

— Hey, I told you I couldn't leave you in a Carlos-less world. — Jill smiles at him, happy that he was alive. — That would just be too cruel. — Jill extends her arm, lifting Carlos. — What about him? — Carlos asks about Nicholai, getting into the helicopter to start him.

— Why’d you do it? — Jill asks next to Nicholai, the man smiles, holding his chest.

— There's a price tag for everything. Even letting the world burn. — Jill looks at him with disgust, tired of all this.

— Who are you working for? — She hears the helicopter engines, she knew Carlos was waiting for her.

— I'll tell you if you get me out of here. I'll pay you whatever you want. — Valentine smiles, looking at the helicopter, walking to it. — You’re a fool. You’re a fool! — Nicholai kept saying, looking at Jill close to the helicopter. — If I die, you’ll never find out the truth.

— I don't mind a little detective work. — She climbs into the helicopter, closing the door, sitting down, feeling the helicopter start to take off. Her gaze lands on Carlos, and she can't help but smile, she was finally where she wanted to be.

Δ bonus

B.S.A.A. organized a huge event, with all the team members, to honor some people. Jill hated this type of event, but it always came because Chris insisted that it was good to rest after all the B.S.A.A. missions, but she knew that she only came to make fun of people's behavior with Carlos.

Carlos and Jill stayed together after Raccoon City. They were together, dating, for a long time. Carlos loved it when Jill made a joke about these events, and to Jill it seemed kind of forced when he insisted that they come to that specific event. Jill knew she never won awards, they always came for the food and the joke, and sometimes, they would come to Carlos receive his awards.

Redfield had contacted Carlos, convincing him to bring Jill. The reason was simple, the only honorees of the night were the former members of S.T.A.R.S. for all the service they did and still do, Oliveira was happy to bring Jill, he loved seeing her smile with the jokes they made, and she looked beautiful in those chic dresses.

Jill always accompanied him when he received awards, and he was more than happy to be able to accompany her on this one. He knew he would be up front, seeing her on stage, and applauding her, Jill was an extraordinary woman, and Carlos couldn't be more proud.

When they called her name it was a shock. Jill had been very happy when they called the name of Barry, Chris and Rebecca, applauded them with a huge smile on their face, but didn’t expected when she heard her name, she looked at Carlos, with a weak smile, and he opened a huge smile, standing up to hug her. Following her as she headed towards the stage, joining Barry and Rebecca, while Chris gave a short speech.

And Carlos was there. At the front, cheering her with a smile on her face, Jill cried when Chris's speech spoke about her, she laughed and hid her face in Barry's jacket, ashamed, but Carlos, Carlos thought she was beautiful.

#carlos x jill #carlos oliveira #jill valentine #jill valentine and carlos oliveira #chris redfield #albert wesker #brian irons #barry burton #rebecca chambers #dick valentine #jarlos #valenveira #valeveira #enrico marini #brad vickers #nicholai ginovaef #s.t.a.r.s.#resident evil #resident evil 3 remake

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perenlop · 4 years

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Tea + pokeani

at the risk of sounding like that shitty anon you keep getting (sorry about that btw) i think that people are wayyyyy too critical of the anime but only for the wrong reasons. stuff like “ash doesn’t age so its bad” or “ash resets his team” or “ash loses even when i think he shouldnt” or “why do the companions change” or “why doesnt he get a specific pokemon but his friend does instead thats bad writing” are all massive nitpicks that can both be explained inuniverse with ease and also just like. amount to this being a show thats been airing for over 20 years with very few hiatuses like its not always gonna be perfect or stellar. sometimes they need to shake things up and we can see from how johto was handled that the resets are pretty necessary.

theres still stuff to criticize though obviously like they didnt have to keep ash after kanto/johto and then only rotated protags like in pokespe plus theres the genuine nasty stuff the creators have done with the girls + the transmisogny and even little things like team rocket being gnc and poor but also the villains youre supposed to mock and think are dumb. i just think people blow the super tiny stuff like gou getting sobble or pikachu being emotional in an episode wayyyyyyyy out of proportion and the best way i can describe it is if the fandom was an echo chamber where they just yelled the same nitpicks over and over to the point where people think “pikachu lost to a level 5 snivy!” or “iris got a dragonite earlier than i wanted her to!” is genuine perfect criticism.

pokeani itself is admittedly sort of brain candy to me a lot of the time. i do love it and i adore it dont get me wrong, and theres absolutely stuff to talk about and criticize and all that like ash vs paul sinnoh league is a discussion for the ages and i could talk about ash and kukuis father son relationship all day! but basically i primarily watch it for entertainment and i dont really expect top tier writing except for when they obviously want it like the team galactic/paul/alola league arcs and usually the entertainment is very good so i appreciate pokeani just for that.

also ive talked about xy to death already so uhhh while i love diamond and pearl and its my favorite arc i still remember it having issues like that third year drags pretty hard (maybe they shouldnt have gotten rid of gliscor and MAYBE it wouldve been better but noooo) and also the abuse apologism in paul’s arc here and there (+ pauls entire reasoning for being that way was just awful like even as a kid i called bullshit) and gible being shoe horned in was so tedious. its still my favorite overall like it has my favorite group and my favorite pokemon teams and battles and episodes but i feel like people gloss over those flaws when stanning this series and then go and shit on bw. also tobias was funny as fuck i want him back fight me

bw was also like... i feel like i will always have at least a bit of fondness for it bc i have nostalgia for it and unova is my favorite region, and i love a ton of pokemon in ash’s team and a bunch of episodes, but i do acknowledge that it also has a ton of issues like the pacing and that league and even though the rivals (burgendy specifically) were fun and had good writing a lot of them are spread pretty thin just bc there are so many of them. iris is also the best character in not just this arc but one of the best in the show dont @ me.

sm is one of if not the best ones because of how well it actually incorporates the actual pokemon, how it manages to give both engaging and fun episodes but also serious episodes with mature (actual mature btw not edgy fandom mature) storylines that doesnt talk down to its audience, while having some very well choreographed battles, and also having a very good subtle message about ash being at his best when hes cared for and relaxed. its really fitting how this was the series where he won the league honestly.

#i have some things to say idk how coherent this is lol #mail #d-stabilize

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