#lately a lot of the art i really connect with is about the environment

[amoonshapedpool]

Gillian Genser, Heart

#gillian genser #women artists #art #sculpture #she's a very interesting artist #she got blood poisoning and is now chronically ill because of some of the materials she uses in her sculptures #and she's made that a part of her work #like it's about life and death and the environment and pain #lately a lot of the art i really connect with is about the environment

[springtyme]

51 ✨ for carmy 🐻

𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐩 𝐀𝐭 𝐀 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞 ♡

Thank you for the request anon, I hope you like it! 💕

Carmen Berzatto x reader || Carmy playlist || Main masterlist

51: “I can’t live without you.”

The strain of Carmy's new responsibilities at The Beef has taken a toll on your relationship, leaving you worried and questioning your place in his life. And you're scared, but not for the reason Carmy thinks.

Angst (with a happy ending). Hurt/comfort. Mention of what happened to Michael.

word count: 2.1k

You stand in the dimly lit hallway of your apartment, anxiously tapping your foot against the worn floorboards. It’s late, much later than Carmen had told you he would be home. The clock on the wall mocks you with its ticking, each second feeling like an eternity.

Your relationship with Carmen has been strained lately, the weight of his responsibilities after taking over The Beef after Micheal’s death has taken a toll on both of you.

You and Carmen had met in New York, about two years ago, when he had moved into the apartment next to yours. You had not looked for a relationship and neither had Carmen, but it was like fate had kept pushing the two of you together. 

It had just started out with a few chance encounters in the hallway or at the local grocery store, with him stumbling slightly over his words as he asked you about your day or offered to carry your groceries. 

But it had been a power outage which had left the whole building in darkness that really had brought you together. You had fumbled your way out in the hallway to figure out if it was just your apartment that had lost power or if it was the whole building. And that’s when you had bumped into Carmen, literally. His strong arms had wrapped around you instinctually, preventing you from falling on your ass. 

You had candles in your apartment, unlike Carmen so you had invited him in to share the light and wait for the power to be restored. As the hours passed, you two ended up talking and getting to know each other better. It was a simple yet intimate evening, and from that moment on, you felt a connection that you couldn’t ignore and a sweet friendship had blossomed between you.

He didn’t have much time off, literally working at one of the best restaurants in the world, but the moments you did spend together were cherished, and it hadn’t taken long before your connection had grown even stronger, evolving into something more than just friendship and eventually blossoming into a real and deep relationship. 

You had not hesitated to say yes to move back to Chicago with him after his brother had passed away.

You never got to meet Michael, Carmen didn’t really speak to him through all the time you dated, you've never fully understood what had happened between them, but you have a feeling that Carmen didn't really knew it either, and he has never really liked talking about his family in general, but you do know that he loved Michael a lot.

You had tried to convince him to go to the funeral, telling him that you would be there for him, but he had kept shooting the idea down. He kept excusing it by saying that he couldn’t, his contract at the French Laundromat hadn’t expired yet, and despite that being true, you had a feeling that going to the funeral would make the loss of his brother feel all the more real, and that was something he wasn’t ready for.

You also had the feeling that he didn’t want to see his mother, at least not in that setting, so you had just decided that you would let him grieve in his own way, and just be there for him in whatever way he needed you to.

It had been the same you had done with his job after all.  

You know that he had loved his job in New York, in his own fucked up way. It was a messed up, down right toxic, work environment, and it had hurt to see him come home every night, tired to the bone, both physically and emotionally drained, yet he kept doing it. His ineffable love for the culinary arts that just couldn’t be extinguished kept him going. It is just after you moved to Chicago a month ago that he told you that he would throw up every morning before work.

It crushed you to hear that Carmen was suffering silently, but you understood why he continued to push through. The restaurant industry was demanding and competitive, and Carmen was determined to prove himself. You had hoped that the move to Chicago would bring some relief, a fresh start away from the toxicity of his previous job. However, the weight of his responsibilities at The Beef seemed to have only deepened the strain on your relationship.

You love him, and you want to be there for him, no matter what. But the constant absence and distance have started to make you question where you stand in his life. But most of all you’re just sad that he is sad, or really it's more that you're sad that he is in a situation that should make him sad, it's like he doesn’t even really allow himself to be sad, and that really hurts to watch. 

You try to push away those negative thoughts, you try yo remind yourself that Carmen is just going through a difficult time, but that just makes the worried feeling in the pit of your stomach feel even heavier.

As the front door finally creaks open, your heart skips a beat. Carmen steps inside, his weary eyes meeting yours. The exhaustion etched on his face is painfully evident, and your worry intensifies, yet you're just so happy to see him. As he slides off his jacket his white t-shirt comes into view, it’s stained with sauces and his hands bear the marks of countless hours spent in the kitchen, but it’s the weariness in his eyes that tears at your heart.

“Hey,” he mumbles, his voice hoarse from lack of rest. “Why are you still up?

You muster a small smile, trying to hide your concern. “I couldn’t sleep,” you admit softly, stepping closer to him. “I was worried about you. You said you’d be home earlier.”

Carmen sighs heavily, running a hand through his unruly hair. “I know, I’m sorry, it was just... things got really busy tonight.”

You nod, biting your lip to hold back the words that threaten to spill out. You want to scream at him, not from a place of anger, but frustration, to make him understand that his health is more important than any sandwich on the menu. But you also know that he pours everything he got into the restaurant.  

“I’m just worried about you, Carmy,” you finally manage to say, your voice tinged with both frustration and concern. “You work yourself to the bone, and it’s taking a toll on you. I can’t bear to see you like this.”

He sighs, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “I know,  but there is not much I can do about it, okay. I’m sorry for putting you through this. But I can’t just abandon the restaurant. If I don’t fix it Jimmy’s gonna sell it and turn it into a fucking Applebee’s.” 

Tears well up in your eyes as you take a step closer to him. “I get that, Carm. I do. But you need to take care of yourself too. It hurts seeing you like this.” 

Carmen looks at you, his tired eyes searching your face. There’s a mix of frustration and resignation in his gaze, as if he knows you’re right but doesn’t know how to change the situation. The weight of his responsibilities seems to visibly crush him, and it breaks your heart.

“I know, I know,” Carmen says, his voice tinged with defeat. “But it’s not that simple. The Beef is struggling, and I need to turn it around. I can’t just walk away.”

Your frustration builds, and you can’t help but argue back. “I understand that, Carmy, but you also can’t sacrifice your well-being for the sake of this restaurant. There has to be a way to find a balance, to take care of yourself too.”   

“I know I need to take care of myself, and I don’t want to keep putting you through this,” his voice taking on a more frustrating tone, he isn’t yelling, but there’s an edge to it. “But I just... I don’t know how to do that right now, okay”

The tone of his voice makes you pause for a moment, he has never talked to you like that before and you can’t help but slightly flinch. You know that he is just frustrated but it still makes you feel a deep pang of hurt. It’s not that you’re scared or anything, you know that he would never ever hurt you, you’re just sad that it has come to this. 

But seeing you flinch clearly affects Carmen, his frustrated expression softening, turning into an expression of guilt and regret instead.  

You swallow the lump in your throat and take a deep breath, trying to regain your composure before saying what you need to say. “I love you, Carmen, and I want you to be happy. But I can’t stand by and watch you destroy yourself in the process.” you’re taking a deep breath before continuing, “you’re scaring me.” 

Carmen’s gaze meets yours, the expression in his eyes breaking your heart. “I never wanted to scare you. And I-I would never hurt you.” 

This makes your heart break even more, yes you had flinched at his tone of voice, but not because you in any way had thought he would physically hurt you, never. The thing you’re scared of is that he’ll end up hurting himself…  

You reach out to take Carmen’s hand, wanting to assure him that you understand his intentions, but also wanting to convey the depth of your concern.

“I’m not scared you’ll hurt me, Carm. I know you’d never do that. I’m scared you’ll hurt yourself.” Tears are now streaming down your cheeks, your voice trembling as you’re about to unveil your biggest fear in all of this. “I just don’t want you to end up like Micheal, okay… I was scared that the reason you didn’t come home was because you had blown your brains out on a bridge somewhere.”  

Carmen’s eyes widen at your words, a mixture of shock and pain flashing across his face.

He reaches out to gently wipe away your tears, his touch warm and comforting. “I’m not going to end up like Michael,” he whispers, his voice filled with a mixture of determination and vulnerability. “I promise you, I could never do that to you.”

You hold onto his hand tightly, desperately seeking reassurance. “But Carmy, you’re pushing yourself so hard. You’re not taking care of yourself, and it scares me. I don’t want to lose you. I can’t live without you.”

He pulls you into a tight embrace, holding you as if he never wants to let go. “You don’t have to, I promise you.” His voice cracks with emotion, and you can feel his tears dampening your shoulder.

You hold onto him just as tightly, your heart breaking for the pain he’s been carrying alone and you’re just so happy that he is finally letting himself cry.  

Carmen pulls away slightly to look into your eyes, his expression a mix of gratitude and determination. “I don’t deserve you, but I’m so grateful to have you by my side.”

You smile through your tears, relieved to see him opening up and acknowledging the need for change. “We’ll figure it out together. We’ll find a way to make things work.”

“Yeah, we will,” he nods, before continuing. “I… I actually started going to Al-Anon, I go three times a week.” 

You’re taken aback by Carmen’s revelation, but also immensely proud of him for taking this step. You gently squeeze his hand, your love for him growing with each passing moment. “That’s amazing, Carm,” you say softly. “For how long?”

“I started going two weeks ago, I don’t know why I didn’t say anything earlier,” he admits, a hint of shame in his voice. “I guess I just needed to take it in my own tempo.” 

You shake your head, wiping away your remaining tears. “It’s okay, Carm, I’m just so glad you’re looking out for yourself.” 

Carmen takes a deep breath, his gaze filled with renewed determination. “I really don’t deserve you, thank you for not giving up on me, even when I pushed you away. I love you so much, and I promise I’ll find a way to make this work.”

You lean in and press a gentle kiss to his lips, feeling a sense of hope and unity. “I love you too, Carmy. And yeah, we’ll face this together, one step at a time.”

Thank you for reading! ♡ this is my first time writing for Carmy and I had such a blast writing for him, but I also was a little intimidated by this piece, so please let me know what you thought ♡

#springtyme writes #springtyme 1k celebaration #carmen berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto x you #carmy berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x you #carmen berzatto #carmy berzatto #carmen sandiego #carmen berzatto fluff #carmen berzatto angst #the bear fic #the bear fanfiction #the bear x reader #jeremy allen white x reader #the bear fandom #the bear #the bear headcanon #the bear angst #the bear fluff

[bonefall]

i remember seeing one(maybe two(?)) of your posts about gods and how humans used to have their own gods (iirc there was also something about how humans interact with nature but i forgot)

but i saved it to read later because i needed to sleep but now i cant find it and I'm starting to think it was a dream ksksjsjsj

I remember that post! I still think about it. Thinking about leeches made me get really emotional about ecology lmao.

Leeches rely on human livestock. Many trees live longer when coppiced and pollarded. Moorland is a biome that thrives through management, if the gorse is left too long, it simply scorches the land to ash.

I just... god it's so beautiful. How humans are part of nature. The connection between culture, religion, and land. We're not separate from it, humans are a keystone species and this part of the british ecosystem evolved to accommodate early hominids.

Since that post I've learned a lot more, to become more furious at the exploitation, extinctions, and botched management of the ecology of this region.. But that's exactly it. Botched.

There's nothing inherently evil about humans and the only reason why it can't go back is because that's being PREVENTED by selfish interest. The problem is unsustainable agriculture and bad building practices, by way of greed or by ignorance.

Ignorance we can fix. Greed we can beat. It'll never be the same and that's okay!! It's not too late to MAKE IT BETTER!

Initially I'd approached the spirituality of the project as making the gods "beyond" the mortals in the setting, like older things of some pristine, bygone era. I now believe that's actually a bad mindset. What are gods? What is religion? An extension of ourselves. The collective dream of human belief.

You're part of nature. Spirituality is a part of you. Nature is part of spirituality. All of these things have an affect on each other... or, they should.

And, y'know, I know it's Battle Cat Fanfiction, it's inherently a bit silly. But, funny as it may be, it's my art and my passion.

So anyway with humans and the clan cats, I really write clan cats like small hominids with a carnivorous diet. It's looking at canon and going, "Yes And," because they absolutely don't write with realistic biology in mind haha. I hope that I'm teaching people some cool things about this environment. And I hope that I can get people to think about the changing nature of culture.

In this setting, I think that humans used to have many gods of their own, and there still exist many beyond the scope of the setting. But in this region, human spirituality is being severely neglected. Various cultures of cats are keeping these sorts of beliefs alive, right under humanity's noses.

Big ramble but... *Shrugs.* Just stuff I think about sometimes.

#bone babble #Really more of a bone ramble I guess lmaoo

[oobbbear]

Hi again. I hope you’re doing alright and I hope I personally didn’t make you feel upset or uncomfortable or anything. I feel part of it is my fault that you feel down about your art…

But I want you to know that you and your art are truly special and wonderful. Even if it is simply just a hobby…

You and your art mean a lot and I hope you know that you are important and you matter very much! ❤️

First thing first, it’s not!!!!! I love your questions it’s just I had some hard time coming up with answers, it’s never your fault don’t say that :’) !!!!!!

I’ll do my best to answer some of your questions, please take all of these with a giant cart of salt I don’t know anything

Do I study art? Yes, I’m currently in college studying animation. Is it worth it? Depends, most of the stuff they teach you can learn online for free, companies don’t really look at their education level when hiring an artist they focus more on the person’s portfolio, if you can get the job done then they would hire you👍 most people here are to build connections and have a environment and peers to motivate themselves to study.

For the second question, how do I balance art and life? The answer is no I don’t :’) the problem with turning your hobby into work is that you don’t get a hobby anymore, I draw for school then I draw for myself it’s all I do I draw, non stop… I’m trying to get into new hobby lately so I don’t burn my passion away it’s a bit hard but it’s going

Third question is it an alright source of income? I don’t have an answer for it yet since I’m still in school, but from what I heard it really depends. Animation jobs are gig based, it’s not a stable career you’ll be running around finding new jobs every few months. Most artists I know have a side job that they can lean onto when they’re in the middle of job hunting, either an Etsy shop or commissions. The pay depends on the studio you’re working for, if it’s a big company then they can pay you okay, it’s a big company at least they have policies and regulations. if it’s small production then it’s hard to say, many are too much work for too little pay.

The animation and gaming industry are not doing well either, so many experienced people are getting laid off lately leaving little chances for newbies it’s a burning dumpster of a industry and don’t even get me started with ai art … I don’t want to sound negative and kills someone’s hopes and dreams but it’s really not the best place to be at the moment, I don’t even know if I want to do animation in the future it’s kinda frustrating

I’ll leave the final decision to you ofc, I’m not saying don’t study art, just that you need to think this through, there are positives like you’re gonna learn so much new stuff to better your work, and you can do something you enjoy as a job, it’s so much better than spending your life doing something you don’t like. But there’re also negatives like it might kill your passion and a job is hard to find

#ask #if I want to be rich I won’t be doing art #I do this because I love it #even if it burns my love #I still love it

[twelvegrimmyplace]

Nick Grimshaw on kindness, queerness and life lessons as a grown-up.

Gay Times Honours Issue 2023

Friendly media mogul Nick Grimshaw, aka Grimmy, has done it all. He’s introduced his parents to Lady Gaga and, recently, even had tea with Harry Styles. Now, however, the former Radio 1 DJ is getting acquainted with something else – growing up. 

Getting older, no doubt, is terrifying. Carefree late nights with mates at sticky, flooded gigs are suddenly swapped for questions revolving around major milestones: partners, career, and, of course, kids. Close friends are no longer egging you on to ditch work and hangout or checking in to see if you’ve actually drank water. Instead, you’re trying to squeeze in a meetup between deadlines, dates and an ever-growing to-do list of life admin. And Grimmy is no different. Booze-driven afterparties have morphed into nourishing Sunday roast dinners with Mesh, his fiancé. Girl dinner Quaver packets have matured to conversations – on his glitzy new foodie podcast Dish co-hosted by Michelin-star chef Angela Hartnett – with Miriam Margolyes on how she likes her mashed potatoes. 

Having the big four-zero on the radar prompted a new perspective for the presenter. What was once maligned (“I felt like growing older was the end of something or deeply depressing,” Grimshaw admits) has been, mostly, embraced. It’s less coming of age but, rather, coming to age. Still, new digits doesn’t need to mean the fun is over. In fact, just last night, Grimshaw partied late with celebs Jake Shears, Amanda Lepore, Jodie Harsh, and Mutya Buena in Soho. Here in Holborn, however, things are much more mild. Sure, there’s some tasteful framed nude art to our right and Queen’s ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ crackling over studio speakers but nothing beats a good old-fashioned launch party, or a karaoke b-day bash taking place later this evening in central London. 

Nursing a non-alcoholic beer, Grimshaw scoots across a black leather couch, arriving fresh from a photoshoot, something he describes as his “Naomi Campbell moment”. Comfortably clothed in a light-wash denim shirt and distressed jeans, he kicks off the conversation as if reuniting with an old friend. “I've never taken stock before. I'd never sat down and thought about myself, ever, and I don't think people do,” he says. Since his early twenties, Grimshaw’s image has been inextricably tied to two things: big names and his infamous towering quiff haircut. At some point, he acknowledges, you will have heard his quick-fire Mancunian comedy soundtracking your early mornings. Whether he was making jokes with Taylor Swift or having the early hours crashed by Charli XCX, the presenter became a known face at the Beeb. In his autobiographical book, Soft Lad, Grimshaw reminisces on the pull the small screen had on him as a young child. Armed with a love for glamour and theatrics, the events he saw on the telly called to a younger Grimshaw who dreamed of moving out of Manchester to take on London. 

Onboarding, in 2012, at Radio 1 to cover The Breakfast Show was something the podcaster remembers clearly; “There was a lot of pressure”. His days of spinning songs and connecting with artists over music became more than a vocation, but a specialism. While he does admit, sheepishly, that there were days his hangover ran over into work hours, he’s since taken time to reassess his habits and lifestyle. “When I was 23 I was getting absolutely wasted and doing it like a Geordie Shore night out,” he says. Now, Grimshaw is more conscious of being selectively sober in certain environments. “It can be really hard to go out and connect with people who are drunk and you're not drinking. But, sometimes, you have the best nights ever. I went out last night and went to a really fun party up until 1.30 am and had really good chats with loads of people.” He’s taking stock of the bigger moments around him, particularly ones that bring him closer to friends and family – “It's about learning. It's about growth,” he says earnestly. 

At 39, Grimshaw’s longevity has something to do with his candour and bonhomie. The most common compliment doled out about the presenter is his warmth. As a child, he recalls, the label “soft lad” was stuck to him, presenting his sensitivity as something to be ashamed of. But, years later, it’s become something – like his favourite Maison Margiela knit sweaters – that he wears openly. “At school, I always felt on edge that I was going to get beaten up or laughed at. When you've had that, you learn empathy and you think about how people might feel or what they're going through,” he explains. 

Realisng he was gay, as a child, filled Grimshaw with dread as he feared what it would mean. With limited queer culture references growing up (just Elton John and Lily Savage) his feelings were fully realised, aged 11, when he developed a crush on a poster of England footballer David Beckham pinned up on his bedroom wall. “You know what’s funny, not that I’m doing Miriam Margolyes press, but I saw her yesterday. I'd never met her and I went into her dressing room. Before I could say hello, she pointed and exclaimed: ‘You’re gay!’ and continued with ‘So, my dear, nice to meet you.’ As I got into bed last night, I thought about how that would’ve killed me if I was a teenager, but it was a really lovely bonding moment.” 

Though being a presenter and DJ took up most of Grimshaw’s early adolescent years, his move to writing has allowed him the space to trawl through his past years without expectation. From reassessing his comfort with queerness to realising the strength found in the LGBTQIA+ community outside of his town in Greater Manchester, Grimshaw is grateful for the relationships he’s built with those around him. “I learn constantly from the queer community. It’s that notion of being yourself and leaning into yourself which can be hard to do if you're queer, especially if you've had that knocked out of you when you're a kid,” he says. “The community are essential in helping everyone, and me, support one another.”

Soft Lad and Dish capture different versions of Grimshaw; the quirky characteristics of a presenter that couldn’t surface in a music hotbed. In his new roles, the presenter-meets-podcaster chats to hot-shot talent while unravelling stories centred around food, famous friends and frenzied stories. His book is an homage to his parents (“I realised how important they were shaping me – I love them contractually, but also really love them) and to his English and Irish roots. Bookended between stories of queer curiosity and his loathing for football, tales of community and camaraderie at Radio 1 surface. “I loved it when we had a great guest from the queer community. I had great times with Sam Smith, they would be a riot and would really gossip with us when the records were on and tell us stories that we couldn't have on the radio. Troye Sivan was a great time as well,” he recalls. 

Another memorable moment was his run-in with an early-era Lady Gaga, in Notting Hill, before she became Mother Monster as we now know her. “I did my first interview with Gaga years ago, for the telly, and it was when she was brand new. ‘Just Dance’ had just come out in America and she was making a bra out of gaffer tape on a dressing room floor,” he says, laughing. “I brought mum and dad along because they were in town so they met her right at the beginning of her career. Ever since then, whenever she'd come onto the radio show, she’d ask about my mum and dad.”

Grimshaw’s stories of famous crossovers are, understandably, endless – even if they’re ones he’s told plenty of times before. Up until recently, he’s remained embroiled in an ecosystem of music promoting a “product” but, now, he feels like his new projects allow for authentic conversations about people and their interests. His mantra, nowadays, is this: “Living in the full, truest form of yourself, without fear and judgement.” For a young Grimshaw, this unbridled queer joy took the form of “glamorous” drag shows where he dressed up as Cher for his family. Today, it’s about cooking in a kitchen packed with too many guests (and remembering to drink water). Turning 40, at one point, felt like a frightening due date. Now it’s a milestone Grimshaw is ready to take on.

#nick grimshaw #press #gay times honours 2023

[lucabyte]

hi im the anon who asked for ocs

thank you so much i love them so much

Im so happyy and gwaaghhh love your art and ocs so much and the worldbuilding seems so cool!!!!

erm i have not yet read all the linked things (hehehe soon SOOON) and literally would love to know even more about ALL OF THEM so uhhh *spins the wheel* tabitha

Hiiiiii!!! Cradles this ask in my hands like a baby bird. Thabmk you..... I have been staring at this ask periodically for days because I wanted to do some little explainer charts and do it justice for how kind you've been :')

Anyway!!! Tabitha is the funniest character to ask about first because he's like a fucked up little lodestone for MYMK's various factions.

Tabitha is.... A sleepy little (38 year old) guy. He has never done anything notable in his whole life ever.

... So he's the son of the richest man in the country. Not that he tries to think about that particularly often. His partner also doesn't think much about it since... Well, it doesn't really come up? Neither like their family so neither talk about nor visit them. And Chrome first got endeared to Tabitha after dragging his malnourished ass off the office floor a few dozen times when he'd passed out at work. He's clearly not bougie (and Chrome was relatively middle class anyway).

Eeeeeveryone else in Cliffside though (who's politically aware) is just, so suspicious of his sleepyhead ditzy guy demeanor. There's no way he's really that clueless and dim-witted.

Which... Is true. He's not dim-witted, just spacey and has internalised that all of his knowledge is worth absolutely nothing an undiagnosed autistic man who is finally in a low-stress environment.

So he's generally spending most of his days reading wikipedia, sitting in the sun on an unfinished porch, or doing the bare-minimum work he needs to pretend to still be employed. (He's still a music producer, just one that is very VERY derivative of his peers...)

(pictured: Tabitha bangin out the tunes)

But yeah! He's genuinely a chill dude. But once the plot gets rolling he does become an... Obvious hostage for the more dubious of our main characters. He's more fine with the hostage thing than the requirement he go deal with his family again.

But obviously things go a little awry when trying to use someone as a bargaining chip like this, even if they don't want to defect...

Which is where Tabitha's absoute UNINTENDED TRAIL OF DESOLATION rears its head. Turns out he uh, actually did have social connections before he up and vanished from all their lives? Turns out that um... You exist to other people?

Tabitha, high strung and basically constantly in meltdown mode in his late-teens early-20s did a lot of peacekeeping for his father. Peacekeeping between him, and the people that were Tabitha's childhood peers. It doesn't help that he was a good 5-8 years older than a lot of them, being somewhat of a cool older kid/teen/adult to look up to. And then! When he finally broke he just up and left, never really looking back.

It's hardly his fault, he was under a lot of pressure and was hardly properly socialised for this... But these are the sharks he'll be thrown to should he end up anywhere near his old haunts. Which he is. And will end up being. If he is perhaps brought there by our well meaning protagonists. Oops.

I like Tabitha a lot and he's a particularly deep side-character of mine. Functioning as an obstacle, ally, win condition... And very dangerous 'I'll kill everyone in the room and then myself' for Chrome should something happen to him. So be careful! He's fragile! And don't forget he has thoughts of his own, too...

I have a longer diatribe (Link!) detailing his whole backstory and meta-backstory (he's built out of psychoanalysed anime tropes!) so I wanted to talk about his actual um. Plot role and relationships outside of Chrome a bit! (BECAUSE HIS RELATIONSHIP TO CHROME IS VERY SWEET AND IS MY HOMEGROWN OTP BUT ALSO. THEY ARE CODEPENDENT. BADLY.)

He's fun because he is basically One Of The Villains who fucked off before too much villain shit went down. Which makes him silly as a supporting character. Gotta make sure he doesn't eat too much of the screen-time though.... (He gets enough in Purrgatorio...)

But yeah. Diversity win! This vaguely asexual autistic guy has managed to find a loving partner and a life that doesn't make his head feel like its filled with bees! It's filled with mostly cotton instead now but! He is okay.

Aaaand IMAGE BLAST

... Oh good lord Chrome and Tabitha will be turning 10 years old for real next year also. 11th of November 2015. What a time. Can you believe that I originally made him to be in his like, 20s? Fucked up. He should probably be older than 38 tbf but at this point the timeline is locked in. But god. 10 years. Happy upcoming birthday boys.

#ocposting yaaaaay! A little scatterbrained again but I'm new to the ocposting loredump thing. Ill get better with practice i hope #ALSO FUN FACT. I DIDNT .. KNOW.. THAT TABITHA WAS A GIRLS NAME?? I... I ONLY KNEW OF BOY TABITHAS..... IN 2015...... #so like THAT + HIM BEING FEMININE KINDA WERE... ACCIDENTS... hes just a fop. a dandy if you will. #i do like tabitha a lot. He's one of the easiest characters for me to write which means he's all instinct. and thus hard to like... describ #but also i like him bc what if a guy got nursed back to health by another more aggressive boistrous guy. but you didnt hear me say that. #lucabytetalks

[glitchedsins]

One of my current households:

Going to start off with the newcomer to the household, Jeri. Jeri Traits: Geek, Genius, Dance Machine. Career: Freelance Programmer and DJ(?) Jeri likes to spend most of his time gaming or fucking if he's not busy coding, he's still new to the household so there's much to learn about his behavior. He doesn't hate working out but he also doesn't seem interested in lifting anything His connection with Dion seems purely sexual while his connection with Dimitri is a bit more about enjoying each other's company. This is probably because Dion is such a workaholic he only works, drinks, fuck, work again. I'd like to assume Jeri is kept to self and would rather stay indoors all day until it's time to hit the club to unwind and express himself through music and dance.

Dion Traits: Foodie, Ambitious, Squeamish, Clumsy, Cheerful, Art Lover. Career: Was a Food critic but recently changed his career to Art critic. Part time Camboy/onlyfans. Dion usually will wake up and start his morning with a drink if not a fuck, then straight to work. Dion's a major workaholic to the point of leaving late nights without his partner Dimitri knowing sometimes to go to the office and vacations are just not for him. He enjoys socializing and hosting dinner parties sharing his love for food with his friends and co-workers. To letgo from his uptight daylife/worklife he unwinds not just sexually but by dressing up, maybe it's humiliating to him, maybe he just wants to look good for his partners, either way he loves dressing sexy beneath his buttoned up clothes. He recently became a part time cam boy thanks to Jeri's suggestion and after winning his first award he seems to be very proud of himself, but to balance his day life and night life he wears a mask in all his videos. I'd like to think now that Jeri's moved in Dion finds comfort in knowing that Dimitri will have more company while he's away at work. I think Dion feels like he's spoiled and has to make up for it by working too much.

Dimitri

Traits: Creative, Active, Cheerful, Loves Outdoors, Neat. Career: Used to be a Conservationist now an Activist.

Dimitri is the nuturer of the three, he's always cooking and cleaning up the apartment while Dion's asleep or at work, if he isn't doing household chores he's working out or protesting and speaking up on the behalf of the environment. He originally lived in Sulani and worked as a Conservationist until Dion asked him to live with him in the city, at that point he spent most of his time painting, cleaning and going to the gym but he felt he wasn't doing enough with himself. As Dimitri learned more about the city he grew to become a bit of a rebel and wanted to try to make a difference so he became an activist recently. I'd like to imagine Jeri is probably a hacker so they both kinda are against the system in their own way together. Dimitri still feels like his job as an activist just isn't doing anything, he's forced to wear a suit go around and ask people for money and it just doesn't feel right to him, it's certainly not what he thought he'd be doing. The only thing that's making Dimitri hold on to his job is that he wants to work hard to open up his own Art Gallery one day, but he's also considering is the city really for him? Does he want to go back to the islands or somewhere less crammed and would his two city life lovers be alright with that? Dimitri's got a lot on his mind.

Dion left for work immediately after this photo^

#ts4 #simblr #ts4 simblr #the sims 4 #ts4 story #black simblr

[themuse-if]

20 (or so) Questions with Eve Thompson

Let's get to know this incoming freshman class' jack of all trades! Hopefully we'll find out if those rumors are really true or if they're actually the master of none.

Interviewer: Hey Everly/Everette, thanks for coming in for a more in depth conversation. Let's start simple. What's your birthday?

Eve: June 5th. Summer vibes, you know?

Interviewer: Absolutely. Any nicknames you go by?

Eve: Just Everly/Everette. Keeps it straightforward, and I think it suits me. I definitely don't think I need a stage name.

Interviewer: Good to know. What are some of your good traits?

Eve: Versatility is a key trait – singing, dancing, and acting I want to be seen as an overall performer who can do it all. I'm adaptable, always ready to tackle different roles, and I relentlessly pursue excellence in everything I do.

Interviewer: Impressive qualities. How about challenging traits?

Eve: I can get quite competitive, especially in the performing arts world. It's tough out there, and standing out becomes a necessity.

Interviewer: Understandable. Hobbies outside of the performing arts?

Eve: I know this is completely coming out of left field, but I actually really enjoy knitting. I learned from my Grandma. I would go visit her a lot on the weekends, and we would watch whatever was on the turner classics channel, and she would teach me to knit. It sounds really corny, but I really cherish those memories.

Interviewer: That is just about the sweetest thing I've heard all day. What’s your greatest strength?

Eve: Adaptability. Whether it's seamlessly switching between roles on stage or navigating a new environment like New York, I thrive in ever-changing landscapes.

Interviewer: Admirable. And your biggest weakness?

Eve: Maybe the pressure to stand out. In a city filled with extraordinary talent, it's a constant challenge to distinguish oneself and leave a lasting impact.

Interviewer: It's a competitive world indeed. Describe yourself in one word.

Eve: Ambitious.

Interviewer: And how do you think others see you in one word?

Eve: Talented.

Interviewer: Let's explore fears a bit. What’s your greatest fear?

Eve: Fading into the background, becoming just another face in the crowd. I aim for impact and recognition.

Interviewer: Understandable. Top priorities at this point in your life?

Eve: Navigating the competitive world of performing arts in New York, honing my skills, and making friends as well as connections throughout my time in university.

Interviewer: Big dreams indeed. Tell me about your family.

Eve: Pretty ordinary – supportive parents, two younger siblings, the twins Aiden and Amber. They've always encouraged my passion for the arts, and their support means the world to me.

Interviewer: Admirable. Future goals – what's on your agenda?

Eve: The EGOT I mean an Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, and a Tony that really is the pinnacle. Beyond that, I want to continue evolving as a performer. Leaving a lasting impact on the world of entertainment is the ultimate goal.

Interviewer: Ambitious and inspiring. How would you spend a rainy day?

Eve: Exploring cozy cafes, maybe catching up on theater shows or films.

Interviewer: Favorite book?

Eve: "The Midnight Library" by Matt Haig. I'm honestly not sure if it's my favorite book but I did really enjoy it. It has a really unique concept that I've never encountered before, and I find that really refreshing.

Interviewer: Great choice. And your favorite movie?

Eve: Hmm just one movie, I can't play favorites when it comes to movies. I'll just pick a random one that I like, so "Chicago." It's one of the best from Broadway to film adaptions! You have a super talented all-star cast and an already amazing score to work with and it's just perfection.

Interviewer: Lovely. Any dark secrets?

Eve: No dark secrets here. I mean not really...I have been feeling kind of off lately maybe a bit insecure. Who wouldn't though?! I was a big fish in a small pond, but the pond has turned into an ocean, so I don't feel that big anymore. *nervous laugh*

Interviewer: I completely understand, and I'm sure you'll adapt. Ok, lets switch gears, What's your best physical feature?

Eve: Mmm, I thing I have really good bone structure. My face is just pretty symmetrical.

Interviewer: Indeed it is. What about your least favorite?

Eve: My ears I feel like they stick out to much. Which is why my hair is always at least long enough to cover them.

Interviewer: I see. Lastly, how would you describe being in love?

Eve: I don't know. I think that, well I hope that it's like just finding a new best friend. Someone who I can let see all my little quirks. Someone who gets my silly sense of humor. I think that I really struggle with being 100% my authentic self. When I find someone who lets me be completely me, then I'll know that it's love.

Interviewer: *gets starry eyed* Beautifully expressed, Everly/Everette. Thanks for sharing with me. Excited to witness your journey at NYU and beyond!

#choice of games #choose your own adventure #choose your own story #dashingdon #interactive fiction #interactive if #twine if #twine interactive fiction #choice script #interactive novel #RO interviews #twine story #twine game #themuse if #if: themuse #character profile

[rainytypology]

ATEEZ MBTI

*based on my opinion and cognitive functions. May change later.*

*Also I am aware they have talked about their types, but they most likely used the 16personalities site or something similar. The results are often very inaccurate from there.*

Explanation of cognitive functions

___

Hongjoong: INFJ (Ni - Fe - Ti - Se)

Ni (introverted intuition) is focused on long term goals and planning. Hongjoong has always been very passionate about his music. He even skipped school sometimes just to work on it. He's constantly striving towards his goal of becoming an inspirational artist, influencing the world and society with his thoughtful and meaningful music. He even had a laptop with so much music in it, completely prepared to show them to the world until it was unfortunately stolen and the songs were deleted.

Fe (extroverted feeling) is focused on the feelings of others. Hongjoong definitely cares and looks after the others so much that he tends to forget about himself. With Ni - Fe, he has made it his goal to inspire others through his music, serve as a role model. He also spreads awareness of social issues through projects like Polished Men, Dear Heart, BLM, etc

Ti (introverted thinking) is a very logical and analytical function that picks apart info in order to keep consistent data for self. I don't see him use that much other than him saying he doesn't really understand his own emotions. He may be comfortable using Ti a bit more than Fe sometimes.

Se (extroverted sensing) uses the 5 senses in order to perceive the world. Very present minded and realistic. Being Hongjoong's inferior, he is sometimes clumsy. And according to Wooyoung, Hongjoong often struggles to keep up with daily life. Has an interest in fashion and arts.

Seonghwa: ISFJ (Si - Fe - Ti - Ne)

Si (introverted sensing) takes details from the external world and recreates a detailed internal world. Seonghwa is clearly very neat and tidy, as Si needs structure. Si also prefers familiarity, which is why Hwa can be a bit reserved and in a way, traditional (e.g warning Wooyoung about formalities when he was talking to Stray Kids' Changbin on Kingdom lol). He also couldn't bring himself to informally address Jessi on Showterview despite having a casual talk segment. Only dom/aux Si people would be that bothered by something that different tbh.

Fe - Like Hongjoong, Hwa uses his Fe in order to act as a caretaker for others. He's sensitive to other's emotions. Fe is sometimes a mirror, so may be why Hwa can act "weird" - he just understands the energy of the environment and tries to match it.

Ti - Seonghwa can make deductions and piece information together sometimes

Ne - Seems like he's been more comfortable using this lately. Hwa is natually quiet and a bit shy, but he may have gotten more comfortable to say/do goofy things. Other than that, I haven't really seen him name any ideas he has, making new ideas from patterns and connections, etc

Yunho: ENTP (Ne - Ti - Fe - Si)

Ne (extroverted intuition) is all about future possibilities and outcomes. Yunho is very creative, often coming up with many ideas for different situations. He definitely has the Ne goofiness and optimism. He's very Ne-Fe so he's constantly showing a positive silly side to everyone.

Ti - Evaluates and analyzes his ideas. Ti may be why he's sometimes a bit uncomfortable with very emotional situations. E.g when Hwa was talking about his rib injury onstage and got teary, Yunho didn't really get why he was being so emotional. If his Fe was aux or dom, he would have likely quickly understood why Hwa was crying instead of being confused.

Fe - Yunho's Fe seems quite developed and likely why he scored as an ENFJ. However, I don't see him using Ni - Se. He's definitely not very shy and is receptive to other's feelings. He's fun and charming, overall very likeable and friendly energy. Having Ne - Fe though, he seems to try and keep a happy face a lot, even when something has bothered him. Ne is often optimistic, Fe doesn't want to cause conflict

Si - Seems to be a bit sentimental. Also tendency to relate to things in his past experiences, like events, childhood, etc.

Also due to demon Se (ENTP's shadow function; inferior's inferior function), it is probably why he thinks his anger is his weakness and may feel really emotionally impulsive if he's not careful. May also explain his clumsiness...he has so many stories related to injuries (e.g breaking his nose on the bus, hitting his head on the fish tank and breaking it, etc)

Yeosang: INTP (Ti - Ne - Si - Fe)

Ti - Makes Yeosang really private and internalized. Also may be why he's blunt; most Ti users are just naturally straightforward. He also has great deduction skills.

Ne - Witty jokes and can easily connect patterns externally. Ne comes up the ideas and helps his Ti connect the details and figure out possible answers for a situation. This was definitely prominent in their salary lupin series, in ep 7.

Si - Keeps tracks of details, can easily pick up routine. Likely why he can pick up choreo quite easily.

Fe - As the inferior function, Yeosang may just say what he wants without thinking of the impact on others. Although he does seem aware of his bluntness, so he's not purposely being mean - that's just how he is. Doesn't like worrying others, only going to Hongjoong for help.

San: ISFP (Fi - Se - Ni - Te)

Fi (introverted feeling) is focused on their own feelings, values, and morals. San is sentimental and emotional. He also judges people by their character, no matter their status. He also advocates for people to have their own goals amd values, to just basically be yourself and live for yourself instead of going along with what others want.

Se - San's quick reactions and flexibility. He's also so captivating on stage with the way he peforms.

Ni - Seems to think of future implications of things. E.g gifting someone an item and wondering how much the person will like it. Also has always been passionate about music, always wanted to be a singer since childhood

Te - Ni + Te makes him push forward toward his future goals. San constantly improves as an artist and as a performer

Mingi: ESFP (Se - Fi - Te - Ni)

Se - Love for fashion, only thinking of the moment and not the future consequences. Always wants to try new things now in order to gain the experience and reference it for the future.

Fi - Wants to be his authentic self, wants to truly express himself. Can be seen in the unique yet creative fashion styles, his lyricism, and rapping style

Te - Goes for what he wants. Fi + Te makes him work hard to truly make a name for himself. Mingi wants to be recognized for who he is

Ni - Has a few long goals here and there, but Mingi truly does live in the moment. Admitted he didn't really understand the future implications of being an idol, yet here he is, working hard to show what skills he has

Wooyoung: ESFP (Se - Fi - Te - Ni)

Se - Both him and Mingi have the "loud" and physical sense of humor. They are both amazing dancers as well, being able to use their bodies well and know to exude a particular energy of the performance. Also quite hyper

Fi - Wooyoung wants to focus on being the best version of himself. Likes praise for what he does. Always expresses his honest feelings (e.g not being afraid to show when he's bothered. Has called out some rude "fans" on their socials. Fe likely wouldn't say anything or sugar coat it a bit as Fe doesn't want to cause conflict. Fi won't stand for it though and does not mind expressing their true thoughts if it bothers them a lot.)

Te - Can nag and is very straight forward. Like many Te users, what he wants, he goes for it.

Ni - long term in wanting to be his best self

Jongho: ISTJ (Si - Te - Fi - Ne)

Si - Makes Jongho quite reserved and observant. Compared to the others, he's a lot more calm

Te - He's good at organizing people and leading when he needs to(Salary lupin is a good example). He is the oldest sibling in his family too, so I'm sure it comes to him naturally

Fi - Si + Fi makes him very reserved. Fi is generally more private compared to Fe. Not the most openly affectionate type either - especially as his tertiary - which San has called him out on lol.

Ne - Has the playful nature of Ne at times. Ne also helped his Te come up with and execute the idea of the fake kiss mission in order to not have the other members sabotage his real mission. His Si knew and figured his members wouldn't let him complete his mission peacefully, so he needed to figure out a way to do so.

___

Members in depth:

Hongjoong | Seonghwa | Yeosang

___

Other group analysis:

SF9 | TWICE | BTS | DAY6

___

Other blog:

Astrology + kpop @rainy-astrology

#ateez #ateez mbti #atiny #mbti #myers briggs #typology #kpop #kpop mbti #myers briggs type indicator #cognitive functions #hongjoong #yunho #yeosang #san #mingi #wooyoung #jongho #infj #isfj #entp #intp #isfp #esfp #istj #seonghwa

[protect-daniel-james]

wait let me send that as an ask lol. spotify: 8, 18, 26 ;)

Hehe thank you!

8. Hertzainak - Eh Txo!

This was pretty much my introduction to Basque rock from the 1980s-1990s. And it's a song I often listen to when writing Txoria txori, hence why it's so high up. I just picture the Txoria txori Unai listening to this while driving his car lmao. I just like the vibe of the album overall, the sort of gritty, not-glam 1980s, plus some of their lyrics slightly touch upon the social climate of the era with songs like Pakean Utzi Arte or Si vis pacem, parabelum. Basically, the whole album is a background soundtrack of Txoria txori, the lore that never even comes up (like, the music and songs predate whatever is happening in Txoria txori fic, but I'd say it's the influence and environment that formed both Unai and Mikel in that fic).

18. Aitch - 1989

I'll be honest this is not my usual style of music at all, but for some reason, I just fell in love with Aitch's music, probably because of the Manchester connection, probably because it just sounds ... idk, real? The lyrics, the references... Also I guess I can identify with him more than with black rappers, or rappers from the US lmao. Also, and I think you'll appreciate this, the musical undertone/sample is obviously taken from Stone Roses' Fools Gold. I listened to Aitch's songs a lot last year when I visited Manchester, and some songs - like this one, or Rain, or Learning curve stuck with me. (also, the stuff he sings about or shows in his videos, I take that as the British lad culture which is very...inspirational).

26. Beti Mugan - Oihuak

It's ridiculous of much Beti Mugan actually appears in my Spotify wrapped since I only discovered them in late August/September I think? But yeah, Beti Mugan ended up being my no. 1. artist, which is just funny, since the only reason I even know about them is the Unai Emery's brother connection. (but to be honest I know that this year, I really didn't have The One artist that I would listen to religiously, and I spent most of the spring writing my thesis and listening to whatever shitty random mixes that I found + lots of old-timey Czech pop songs, so I think that all is reflected in the Spotify wrapped as well).

Anyway, Oihuak! Yay! A dark song - a song about trauma? If it was in English, I'd say it's perfect for Lampardverse, since it's basically about ... wounds / intracranial wounds / those that can't be closed. That's the start of the lyrics. I mean, wow. Then the song slowly escalates towards the chorus.

A headcanon of Txoria txori is that Unai writes edgy poems that are actually Beti Mugan songs. It's his secret and he keeps it well, only time will tell if Mikel learns about it ;) But yeah, Oihuak was for me one of the first memorable songs I heard from Beti Mugan, and I remembered it exactly for that desperate, urgent refrain.

#spotify wrapped #spotify ask

[dragonmuse]

Pete is such an interesting character and I love him. I also love all the unsaid stuff ,and you can tell me if I’m wrong, But the whole thing earlier about not being sure if people are attracted to him out of drag is a really interesting concept because when you’re seeing a drag queen on stage you might not see them up close and make up can do a lot of favors, might not notice that Pete has/had a cleft lip. And depending on where his journey took him to getting to being an adult he might’ve been pulled out of school to have surgery and recovery he might not. But all those little things give us this person who’s very grounded and solid and stable and he really is a Home he is Lucius’s home

Thank you so much! He truly does make a home, not only for Lucius, but for Frenchie and John as well! The three of them have this stable environment that they created after moving around so much that holds so strong, they can just take a fourth person into it and move forward easily that way. Lucius does change they dynamic some (his princedom of their little home isn't just true for Pete. Frenchie and John find it sweet that he's so bossy even if they ignore it as it suits them).

And yes, you are correct! Pete is used to being found attractive in drag for a lot of reasons (chasers are a real thing that a lot of drag queens discuss, people, primarily men, who are only interested in sex with a drag queen as a fetish thing). But yes also because Pete in drag can hide quiet a bit more than Pete out of drag.

As for childhood Pete's father was a very solid parent. He worked hard to afford all the surgeries and things that Pete needed in his early life, but also tried his best to make him feel loved just the way he was. There wasn't a big external support system, after Pete's mother left when he was small, all of her extended family disappeared from his life as well. His paternal extended family was well meaning, but distant or erratic (he mentions his aunt is the latter for instance).

So as a result, Pete is a well loved, but often lonely child as there's no one around to be there when his father is working. By the time he's in third grade, he is going to school consistently, but he missed a lot of foundational things and isn't living somewhere where there's a ton of support for that.

The bragging/lying stuff starts in middle school because he's trying to make connections, but doesn't really know how. He does always have a few loose friendships.

His dad is already unwell, but does make it to Pete's high school graduation and Pete pushes to make sure he finishes because he knows it's important to him.

After that though, he's on his own and he kind of just falls into carnival life. He does make some better friends there, including his drag mother. He knows he's gay from a young age, but never got to tell his father, even though he knew that his dad would be okay with it. (Mostly because his dad did suspect and dropped hints that it was fine).

He vaguely knows John for a year or so before Frenchie shows up. When he spots them both leaving a gay club late one night, it's a gift because no one else around him seems to be out just then and it's so freakin' lonely and isolating. And one thing Pete has learned is that if you want to make a connection, you can't sit by yourself. He's pretty much mastered the art of 'I'm going to treat you like your my friend until you accept it as truth'.

Pete is pretty brave that way. Extroverted too.

He's being brave when he flirts with Lucius, who he perceives as way out of his league. When he asks him out to dinner after? Even braver. But he's good at bravado.

And landing Lucius gives him a confidence that turns that facade realer over time. Not just in the getting, but how proud Lucius is to be with him. This beautiful, smart man thinks Pete is the best person in the world and that's a heady drug!

#leda house and the kraken verse

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

Have you seen the British Queer as Folk that was made in 1999? It's now on Netflix so I started watching.

In the first episode one of the main characters in his late 20s has sex with a teenager. When he finds out the boy is only 15 he laughs and so do all his friends. The 15 year old ends up living with the main character as his lover. Have times really changed so much in 20 years or am I reading it all wrong? As far as I can tell these characters are all meant to be fairly sympathetic.

Oh anon - it's taken me a while after reading this before I was able to respond. I do have a visceral anger at this response to queer people of the past. You weren't to know this - but what you have done is looked at the effects of homophobia and judged queer people, rather than homophobic structures. And you are echoing the homophobic arguments that were made years before.

So yes the world has changed significantly since 1999. In 1999, Section 28 was still in force. This made it illegal for schools (or any local government entity) to "promote homosexuality or publish material with the intention of promoting homosexuality." The fifteen year old in that episode would have gone through school in an environment of silence around queerness - silence broken only by homophobic comments. This silence prevented him from being aware of, or connecting with queer people his own age. All he would have heard were the words 'canal st' - framed as a joke or framed as abuse - the way people talked would have made it clear that that's where people like him were.

(The repeal of Section 28 didn't happen until 2003. And the education minister within the Labour government was trying to ensure that the environment of silence wasn't changed and immeasurable harm continued to be done to queer kids).

On top of that, in 1999 the age of consent for men having sex with men was 21, five years older than the age of consent for heterosexual sex (which was and remains at 16). The law said to a 15 year old that they couldn't consent to having sex for six years and shut down communication about queerness with anyone his own age.

And men in their 20s and 30s, they'd been through the same process, the silence and the criminalisation. Some of them had been desperate for queer connection and for sex at fifteen and they knew that coming to Canal St was the only way of getting it.

Section 28 and the unequal age of consent were all based on the idea that that 15 year old boy didn't know what he wanted. That he couldn't possibly have queer desires himself. The restrictions that were put up to protect him from desires he wasn't supposed to have were exactly what meant that the best option for him was to go to a gay bar.

If you are at all engaged in queer art, culture and history, you'll soon learn that Queer of Folk was telling a really common story about queer life. You'll learn about queer artists or activists who had partners much, much, older or younger than them.

The homophobic laws that structured queer British society 20 years ago were repealed. So of course times have changed a lot. How could it be otherwise? I hope you learn to engage with the past with curiosity about power and resistance. Rather than acting surprised that things were different

#A beserker button for me for sure #if you want to talk about queer Britain in 1999 #it's really important not to sound like #the people who were advocating for Section 28

[boinurmom13]

fic update! woo

(no this is not an alert letting u guys know that ive updated a chapter)

omg no way fic update!! (the original ourpose for this acc)

Okay, anyways, official update to my fic! (Now going to be a part of the two-parter or maybe even a trilogy, not quite sure on that last bit)

Change one: Since I wanna take the second part more seriously, the fic’s name is taken more seriously. Chronically offline x Chronically online is now “A Start Too Good to be True…,” which will eventually match with the second part, “…Always Ends in One’s Demise.”

The fic is currently on a hiatus, but i do have some news!

I have finally planned out the rest of part one. Chapters 20-35 are all planned out, with (i hope) more ties between them. There will be more Sam and Bo chapters, one Allan and Bo chapter, plenty of Bo and Lance, and even more lovely surprises!

Chapter 20 is being written rn, and its slow progress.

Mixed with schoolwork and some personal projects (learning code, practicing art, and eventually getting back to working on plushie lance), the progress towards writing the chapters will be slow. BUT, fear not, as I’m going to assume the hiatus will be over sometime late Februrary or March, HOPEFULLY. There are no promises.

As for part two, id like to mark out more of what you guys can expect:

More serious content. I really want part one and par two to contrast. I originally started the fic out as a joke, not expecting it to go anywhere except for dumb mischaracterizatiosn of not only the vanilla and modded sdv NPCs, but also of my own OCs. With part two, I’d like to focus more on what makes the characters characters, which is emotions and reactivity to their environment. I’ve hinted multiple times at Bo’s failing mental health and his and Allan’s deteriorating and toxic relationship in part one, but I’ve never fully fleshed it out. I want my readers, who I do appreciate, to learn the motives  behind their behaviors and actions without having to come to my tumblr blog in order to learn more background.

On top of that, I want to expand upon the actual background and relationship Bo and Amelia had. I don’t think I fully emphasized how much Amelia meant to Bo, or how much impact Amelia had on the people around her. It’s mentioned that she’s a well renound adventurer, and that’s why people recognize her name and show appreciation to those she held dear, but I never allowed the readers to see the connections she had with her guildmates (Marlon, Gil, Magnus, Camilla, and others).

There were things I never mentioned about Bo in part one that i’d like to reference in part two. For instance, and this won’t really bring any spoilers, more about his ‘experimental/medical’ work on monsters, and his use for so many disguises (I’ve mentioned it in a past post about how Bo had a shitload of disguises, but never expanded on why.)

More content with ‘extras’! I mention a lot of the townsfolk in my fic, such as Sophia or Olivia, but I don’t really give them a part. With how the fic is looking, there will be a LOT more content based around Bo’s interactions with the other townsfolk in part 2.

More content with Sam and Lance. There’s a lot of spoilers behind this one, but expect more content between these two!

More content with the Castle Village adventurers/guild members in general. Especially Camilla. Camilla will play such an integral role in this, and I’d also like to build more on her and Amelia’s relationship. There will be some building on Camilla and Bo’s relationship, even though it’s small and based on hatred, there’s going to be a LOT of explaining on how Bo feels about Camilla specifically.

Lessening the cast. This also gives off spoilers, but a lot of the characters you saw in part one will not have such a huge role in part two.

More serious topics on mental health, including things such as suicide, self-isolation, loneliness, and even minor topics of addiciton and self harm.

More appearances from Sponge and Hotdog, Bo’s dogs, should any of you miss them.

Realistic relationship building. Now, I have no experience in romantic relationships, due to never being in one (by choice and probably due to being horribly socially inept), but I want to try to make the gradual make up of a relationship more realistic in this part. I feel like I could’ve done a MILLION times better in part one, should I have known what I was getting myself into.

I want you guys to look forward to a change in writing style, or some sort of change. I know it’ll be subtle, but I want to stray away from frequent 4th wall breaks, and focus more on them being in the form of a character’s thought process.

bo’s crippling mommy issues

a more in-depth look into bo’s family and friends, with mentions of the little he remembers about his mom and aunts, along with his cousins. I also want there to be more references to the past friendships he’s had from places like Northmill and Evotte, but I’ll see how that goes.

more sam and bo, too

NONE OF THESE CHANGES ARE FINAL! I’m not sure how the fic will go, but I want to have you guys look forwards to these more.

One again, part two might not be end! There could be a part three, but i wouldn’t hang onto that. I might cut it off at part 2 and continue making lance/other character one shots.

I wouldn’t hope for any smut in part two, but i also wouldn’t totally rule out the idea. me, personally, i love hate sex. but i love relationship dynamics that make sense more.

As for how this account is going to be utilized, expect more or less the same content, EXCEPT ILL UPDATE YALL ON WHEN I UPDATE THE FIC, TOO! should life pan out the way i want it to, the update alert might even be paired with a little drawing to go with it, Idk! we’ll see!

posting this just to let yall know :)!!!

#fanfic #TGTBT/EIOD fic update #sdv #fic update

[slasher-sweetie]

hello ! it’s very nice to meet you ! i use they/she pronouns ! and i’d like to request a match up, please :]

let’s see,, my appearance,, (going off a list or else i’ll just start rambling!) i’m 5’3, and slender, i’ve been told my eyes are very doll-like in terms of their roundness and the size of my iris (and they’re super dark!) pfft. my hair is dark brown and styled into a wolfcut which is so fun bc i like to curl the side lengths inward ! my aesthetic varies from wearing an oversized horror movie shirt with some baggy pants w my doc martens) think street style or grunge ! ) but lately i’ve been gravitating more towards earth tones and whatnot ! that comforting grandpa aesthetic if that makes sense? but i still dress very much in corsets and grays and blacks from time to time ! a lot of layered necklaces and rings too !

my hobbies include consuming large amounts of media and just adoring the hell out of it. i adore literature and film, i love dissecting the hell out of them and seeing the layers that make it become one great big thing. no matter how small it is, i’ll find myself completely enamored without the idea of the book or film and get excited over that detail. i also really enjoy writing ! most of my writings are emotional pieces as i use them in order to vent out any emotions that i might be experiencing ! i also enjoy art, though i haven’t had much time for it lately ! i’ve been studying towards a sociology degree of lately and just finished my first year at college ! (yay!) i really enjoy things like eating in the garden, walks in woods, art museums, cafes, movie nights, and just in general very comforting and warm environments like those that these things provide! :]

for my personality, hm. i’ve always really connected with the description of infp and get it every time i get any sort of personality test, so let’s go with that ! i’m a very introverted person as well as sensitive, and i feel as though i feel strongly in tune with my emotions as well as others. i really enjoy doing stuff with my friends that doesn’t involve very large crowds, those make me very anxious, ah. i’d like to say that my humor is a bit on the more on the dry humor, or just me being on my general daily fuckery. if i was a genre i’d be something like The Yellow Wallpaper, Possession (1981), type of thing. unfiltered female emotion has never looked so sexy /j

random fact about me: today i will deny god’s will.

thank you so so much for doing this in advance ! i hope that you’re doing well !

So, just from your ask, I immediately knew who you'd be perfect for, and that is Stu Macher, otherwise known as ½ of the OG Ghost Face. Your brand of chaos matches his to perfection, and the two of you get along like a house on fire.

You sat snuggled up with your boyfriend, watching the third horror movie of the night, The Thing. Every time a particularly gruesome death took place, the room was filled with Stu's laughter. It was hard not to enjoy the movie when you saw how happy it made him. It was why the two of you spent most of your nights like this, attached at the hip, snacking on popcorn and candy, and watching as many horror movies as possible before you could no longer keep your eyes open.

Just as the two of you were coming to the part of the movie where you knew the guy's chest was going to break open and chomp down on the hands of his unsuspecting coworker, Stu let out a cry of glee, thoroughly enjoying the gory imagery.

He turned to you, the dimples in his cheek popping with his signature grin, "Sorry babe, that's my favorite part."

You rolled your eyes affectionately, "Don't apologize, silly. I love your reactions. You're really cute."

"You're really cute, too," he told you, leaning forward to place a noisy kiss on the tip of your nose, "It's why we're perfect together."

He pulled you back against his chest, laughing as someone else met an untimely demise. In moments like this, you couldn't help but agree with him. The two of you were perfect together.

#slashers #slasher x reader #slasher x you #horror #horror movies #stu matcher x reader #stu macher #scream #matchups #asks are always appreciated

[shirtshinedplum]

False Idyll

This project was made for EA020 Nature, Culture, Society. We had two weeks from the day it was assigned to the showcase. The assignment was to create an art piece related to an environmental topic, so just incredibly broad. Everybody made something super unique and very cool. I really enjoyed seeing all their work.

Brainstorming ↓

The professor was encouraging, though not requiring, us to engage with the idea of "making the invisible visible." I was also thinking a lot about purity culture and the idea of purity in environmentalism. We had read an excerpt from Alexis Shotwell's book Against Purity where she argues that "purity" is impossible to achieve and dangerous to attempt. "Purity is never made simple. Aspirations to purity, are…misleading ad copy on one level and secret carcinogens as a cell boundary-crossing material reality on another." There is not even such thing as real purity, "there is no primordial state we might wish to get back to, no Eden we have desecrated, no pretoxic body we might uncover..."

Refining the Idea ↓

I came to the idea of sewing a sort of cottagecore dress and attempting to subvert the ideals of purity that exist within that subculture and reveal the hypocrisy present in the way these people present themselves.

Before I talk about cottagecore, I want to say that I did not really go deep into the subculture. I had been exposed to it online before and knew a bit about it and then did some surface level research focused around the look it presents, but I don’t know the nuances of this community and perhaps that is reflected in my analysis of it.

But anyway— Cottagecore is an aesthetic that idealizes rural life. I feel it draws especially from late 19th-century European pastoral life, but it pulls inspiration from multiple places and periods and is not trying to authentically recreate any past style. The aesthetic promotes the ideal of living simply, disconnecting from the internet, being self-sufficient, baking bread, and having traditional feminine and creative hobbies such as embroidery, pottery, painting, baking, etc.

Cottagecore seems to intersect with environmentalist messages, though believe it to be a coincidental byproduct of their want to return to simpler times as opposed to a deliberate want to live or promote a sustainable lifestyle (I'm sure there are people who are interested both in environmentalism and cottagecore and perhaps even picked up on the aesthetic for those environmental reasons, but I presume them to be in an extreme minority). Traditional rural living is more eco-friendly than modern city life: homemade goods, traditional crafts, growing your own food, reducing reliance on consumerism. Consumerism... that's what I'm especially interested when it comes to the cottagecore aesthetic. They idealize a time before rampant consumerism, a time before the internet, a slower, simpler time, just sitting down and reading a book or connecting with your environment. I see a lot of pictures of women collecting wildflowers, picking fruit from their gardens, going on picnics in the rolling countryside. But at the same time, this aesthetic originally gained and has maintained popularity on TikTok. An app that perhaps stands as the antithesis to that type of lifestyle. TikTok is fast-paced and trendy, obsessed with constant engagement and constant consumption. Also ads everywhere! Promoted videos, sponsorships, TikTok shop, undisclosed ads, sometimes it feels like everyone is trying to sell you something.

Look, I like the cottagecore aesthetic. I think it's super cute and, in the current landscape, I can't help but idealize that sort of pastoral living. But engaging in this trend isn't an escape from consumerism. It's driven by consumerism.

Cottagecore is an aesthetic. At its very core, it's about commodification and surface-level adoption. By engaging with it, you are feeding into an industry that exists to shape consumer desires and drive sales. So most people who are interested in this sort of aesthetic aren't really attempting to extricate themselves from our highly consumeristic culture, quite the contrary, they are purchasing products that align only with the image of living a life free from corporate overlords and late-stage capitalism.

Anyway, I've gotten away from the point a little bit. What I was focusing on in this project was the fashion industry. We all know how much fast fashion is ruining the planet and how incredibly exploitative it is.

Here is my extremely quick and condensed summary of ethical problems in the fashion and textile industries:

The fashion and textile industries are major contributors to pollution, resource depletion, and labor exploitation. Industrial monocropping and irrigation deplete soils of nutrients and heavy use of pesticides impacts the quality of the soil and the workers who apply it. Pesticide runoff contaminates water supplies and thus the health of humans, animals, and plants in the area. Even stuff that isn't immediately harmful or toxic accumulates in bodies and magnifies up the food chain. Not to mention just the sheer amount of water that cotton production requires.

Additionally, most fashion brands rely on cheap labor, child labor, and even slave labor in dangerous working conditions particularly in developing countries. These practices violate basic human rights and perpetuate cycles of poverty and exploitation in vulnerable communities.

Here are some links to get you started on further reading if you're interested: Sweatshop Facts — The World Counts; Modern slavery is on the rise. Fashion’s role remains steady — Vogue Business; Fast fashion: an industry built on exploitation — Collective Fashion Justice; The impact of textile production and waste on the environment (infographics) — European Parliament; Tons of water used in cotton production — The World Counts

All of this exploitation of people and Earth's resources contradicts the values of simplicity, authenticity, and connection to nature that cottagecore seems to represent. Perhaps cottagecore was born out of a genuine love and interest in the simple, the homemade, the vintage, and the sustainable, but it has fully been co-opted by commercial interests. Brands have capitalized on its appeal by pumping out mass-produced cottagecore-inspired goods (especially clothing) that not only do not align with those values but fully spit in their face. When purchasing this aesthetic, you are purchasing the idea that you believe in its 'core values.' You are purchasing the illusion of a connection to nature and authenticity while directly supporting practices that undermine those very values.

(I do feel it necessary to point out that there are people that exist who fall into the cottagecore aesthetic but do not engage in the capitalist side of it. However, they are by far not the majority. Like it or not, the aesthetic has been taken over by corporate interest and consumeristic behavior.)

Designing ↓

Cottagecore clothing is very old-world inspired. Milkmaid dresses, prairie dresses, ruffles, light colors, florals, that sort of arena. Because of the time constraint, I decided to incorporate a dress I had already made. A few summers ago I made a milkmaid dress (pattern: Mood Fabrics Anthea Milkmaid Dress). It's like the second real sewing project I did so the construction is kinda wonky, but it has the right sort of top for the look I'm going for, and with my other classwork, I didn't think I'd have time to sew a new top for this project.

For the skirt, I knew I wanted it to be floor length and was thinking sort of like a prairie dress skirt. I ended up going with another Mood pattern (The Heather Dress) though I really could have drafted it myself and I altered it so much anyway.

Going into this stage I knew I wanted the skirt to tell a story about its production. I was thinking sort of a story map style narrative wrapping around the skirt. I was inspired by story tapestries and children's storybook styles.

You can see more of my thought process and ideas below, but this idea had to be scrapped due to the time limit. There was just no way that I was going to be able to design and execute this whole story map idea in just a few days.

I pivoted to a different idea that you can see started to form on those pages. The idea of having the hem appear to have been dragged through mud or blood.

I really wanted to go with the look of having the hem soaked in blood representing the hidden cost behind beautiful garments. The blood of the human beings who work the cotton fields, who sew your clothes, who toil in the hazardous conditions under which our clothes are produced. A visceral reminder of the very real human suffering that produces innocent-looking clothing.

Now that I have made that aspect of the design the entire thing, I felt I needed to expand it a bit. I wanted hands grasping at you as if begging for help. The desperation and anguish felt by workers subjected to abysmal treatment in their work. Blooded hem and haunting images would contrast the pristine and innocent look of the bodice and upper skirt. The stark juxtaposition between our two positions. Their desperation against our indifference. You could extend a helping hand but choose not to, turning a blind eye to their suffering while enjoying the fruits of their exploitation.

Sewing ↓

I went to thrift stores looking for fabric. Reusing fabric from something else supports the message of the piece, but really my main motivation was that I'm cheap. I was looking for a light-colored fabric that matched the tone and weight of the dress I was using for the bodice. Having to match the bodice made the search more difficult, but luckily I was able to find something that works. For $2.99 I got a slightly stained king top sheet. The color goes surprisingly well with the bodice's shade of green, I think this is the best result I could have hoped for given the parameters.

I used my school's makerspace to sew. The machines are kind of crappy, I had quite a few issues with them which caused it to take longer than I could have done on my machine at home, but the job got done and honestly I'm just glad that I have access to a machine out here at all. The thing I will complain about though is the chalk. Like on one hand, thank you for putting chalk in the sewing makerspace. On the other hand, this room was not stocked by somebody who sews. They have blackboard chalk not tailor's chalk which is totally fine except that they only have colored chalk! I didn't look it up beforehand (which maybe is my fault but also I was using supplies in a sewing room) and it stained my fabric. I thought it would come out in the wash, but no. I don't have anything for laundry here besides detergent and baking soda, so when I go home I'll treat it properly and hopefully that will help.

I needed to lengthen the skirt pattern so it went all the way to the floor and then totally forgot until I had marked and was about to cut the fabric. Whoops. And then I didn't actually measure how much to lengthen it by and just guesstimated it. The main part of the skirt should have been longer and then the bottom panel much shorter. The entire skirt ended up about two inches too long. It drags on the floor much more than I would like it to. I could bring up the hem but I hate hemming skirts so much that I've just let it be.

Another thing about the pattern is that it wants you to gather SO MUCH. From the pictures, I did not anticipate the amount of gathering. It's such a pain, and honestly, I think it looks better with the amount I ended up doing instead of using all of the fabric. The problem is that I didn't realize what was going on until I was too far into the process. It would have been such a pain and cost me precious time to cut the fabric and rework it so there was the 'right' amount of gathering and the panel seams hit at the right place. So the placement of those seams is super wonky. I hoped that in the waves of the skirt they wouldn't be noticeable unless you were looking, but turns out that is not the case. Also this meant that there was all of that extra fabric now in the skirt's back panels. In order to install a zipper, I would have to cut those. But I'd have to cut them exactly the right amount and at the right angle. The skirt was taking much longer than I had planned to sew and at this point, there were only a few days before it was due. I decided screw all that tedious work, I've already done so much of it, I'll just use buttons and let the extra fabric (hopefully) cover up the slit in the skirt in a natural way.

I ran into a second problem with the gathering as well but in the opposite direction. The bottom panel is supposed to be as gathered as the top one but it's just so much fabric. I did technically have enough fabric to have 3 panels the size the pattern called for, but I hate hemming and I had the finished edges of the bedsheet right there and I was so frustrated with sewing at this point so I just cut one panel down the length of it. It turned out to be not enough fabric to gather almost at all. If I didn't have a deadline with this project, the gathering does mean enough to me that I think I would have spent the time to cut another panel and hem the whole thing, but unfortunately, that was not the scenario I was in so I just left it how it was. It doesn't look bad the way it is, I just think the shape of the skirt would have been a little bit better. Another factor to consider though is how that would impact the design on the skirt. I was a little worried about the amount of gathering impacting how well the design translated. So I guess it's good for me that I never had to decide how much gathering I wanted for the shape versus how much I could get away with and the design still be readable.

And then with the buttons!! The makerspace did surprisingly have a buttonhole AND button foot, but for some reason the buttonhole foot didn't really work. I've made them before on my machine at home and I watched a tutorial to make sure I wasn't forgetting something, I have no idea why it didn't work. I never took a picture of the failed attempts, but they were just not buttonholes. Instead, I just made them with a series of zigzag stitches. I mean, that's what the machine is doing with the buttonhole stitch anyway, what I did is just a little bit jankier.

Mudding ↓

I finished sewing the dress two days before the assignment was due which left me only one day to translate the design. I'm really glad I simplified it as much as I did and I still think it does a good job of getting the core message across.

Going into the final day I had to work on this, I was still fully planning on painting it. The original plan was for the design to be in 'blood' not mud. The problem is I don't own any paint and wasn't interested in spending any more money on this assignment. Obviously I first looked in the makerspace, but for some reason they don't have any paint?? I went to a few other spaces I thought might have some I could use but came up empty-handed. So I moved on to plan B. Actually, mud was my mother's idea. She suggested it one time when I was talking to her back in the brainstorming phase. It totally works. Mud is freely and widely available and still reads as very similar to the blood idea, only less shocking. So after dinner (yes, I spent all day searching for paint and trying to come up with an alternative without resorting to dirt), I went out in the pouring rain to some fields behind my college to collect dirt.

One important thing I had forgotten about the dirt around here is how sandy it is. The dirt where I grew up was pretty clay-y, that's what I'm used to, and I had just forgotten that dirt around here isn't like that. It's not like the sandy dirt was any kind of deal-breaker or anything, I just thought (1) rubbing it into the fabric will damage the fibers more than a dirt with more clay content and (2) it's probably gonna leave more little rocks and pieces of sand in it's wake.

But it was fine and also like 9 o'clock the night before it was due so I didn't dwell on it. Problem though, it's dark and raining outside, where am I going to do the dirty work? The answer: just in my dorm. My room had dirt and grit everywhere for like a week afterward.

Applying the mud was actually very easy. I first drew the design on the skirt with a light-colored washable marker and then made a mud slurry and really just slopped it on. On the edges and finer areas, I used a popsicle stick to get a harsher line. I also attempted a bit of an ombre effect going up. It was inconsistent, but I stand by the idea.

I draped my skirt over my floor lamp for this, which was a great idea if I do say so myself. The whole process from when I got home with the dirt to when I finished the skirt was maybe four hours and this was certainly the part I enjoyed the most.

Final Thoughts ↓

In the end, it actually turned out kinda okay. You can see in the pictures that I decided to button it at the front side instead of in the back like how it was originally supposed to be zippered. This means that one of the panel seams is right there in front, so not a fan of that. But overall, I'm happy with it. I took these pictures 6 weeks after I finished it and was pleased with how well the mud lasted. I was worried that because it was so sandy, it wouldn't stick as well to the fabric. It did come off some, as you can see, and if it was something I had worn or otherwise moved around more, it would have been a bigger deal, but as it was, I actually liked the way the dirt faded.

If you care, I got a 91% on the assignment, but it was cos my artist statement sucked not because of my actual piece.

....well, goodbye

February 2024

#project #2024

[midnightgiirl]

        .°˖✧ CAPTIVE .°˖✧

CHAPTER ONE

The crisp afternoon sunlight made Anitta’s eyes squint as she watched the trees blur on the window from where she sat in the passenger seat.

The path was smooth, with little to no bumps as her mother hummed behind the wheel, glancing now and then to the sticky note taped on the dashboard, which contained the address of her mother’s new employers. 

The neighborhood wasn’t only foreign to her, but it was intimidating as well. The road was vast, their surroundings quiet, and Anitta could tell from the environment alone that these people were upper class. The few houses that they drove by screamed old money to her - tall and daunting, but they also had an air of loneliness to them. All that land and not a single soul wandering the area. It was unsettling.

She didn’t normally accompany her mother on the job, but considering it was summer, she didn’t have much to do, so her mother suggested she could come with her so she wouldn’t be all cooped up back home. She didn’t do much in her leisure time apart from reading and immersing herself in art. Still, lately, she’s been stuck, so perhaps having a change in scenery could help her gain some inspiration, already fiddling with the sketchbook on her lap.

It wasn’t much of an effort to find the address; devoid of any twists and turns as they finally arrived at the manor which had been located away from all the neighboring properties, sitting all by itself at the very far end of the neighborhood that Anitta couldn’t help but wonder if they even got any cell reception.

The towering gates that shielded the manor stood in formidable spikes, but even through the coverage, the enormity of the house was not lost on her. It stood out like a sore thumb, which said a lot, she then turned to her mother, her voice dripping with curiosity; 

“Where’d you find these people?”

Brown eyes met her green ones, her mother amused by her daughter’s obvious shock “It was Arthur who told me they were looking for a housekeeper, how he managed to land these connections, I don’t know. But if the grandiosity is anything to go by, hopefully, the pay won’t be disappointing.”

Her mother drove closer to the gates, popping her head out the window as she reached for the intercom “Hello?” she called out “It’s me, Lydia Flores, I’m here for the housekeeping job?”

A beat of silence occurred before finally, the gates opened in a screech, as a voice cut through the air in a monotonous tone “You may enter Ms. Flores.” 

Anitta and her mother shared a glance before starting the car back up and driving through the premises, the closer they got to the manor, the more Anitta’s astonishment swallows her, because really, what did these people do for a living?

The manor was a sight, to say the least. The white and black exterior of the home had a gothic feel to it with its high windows and tall doors. The freshly trimmed lawn and bushes let you know the estate was well maintained, which made Anitta even more curious about the kind of work her mother was in for. She wonders if the residing family was big, they had to be, if not it would only seem greedy to have all these acres of land just for the show of it. She wonders what they’re like.

They step out of the car, but not before her mother makes a point to check herself in the rearview mirror one last time to examine her appearance. Letting out a shaky breath before she joined her daughter, who stood idly by as she waited for her mother to finish up, the gush of wind blowing past her blonde locks as she tucked them behind her ear. 

They walked side by side as they padded up the stairs that led to the front door “Do they know I came here with you?” Anitta asked, biting her lip.

Lydia glances at her and shoots a reassuring smile “Yes, I told them beforehand and they were fine. They know you’re seventeen and just as long as you wouldn’t cause a ruckus, it would’ve been an issue had you been younger they said. They don’t want a child running around the estate. Disrupts the peace.”

Anitta nods “Clearly uppity.” she thinks to herself, but she sets it aside as the doors slowly swing open, revealing a man who seems to be in his late 50s, as he scanned both Anitta and Lydia from head to toe “Welcome. Mr and Mrs. Claudius will be with you shortly.”

He was dressed formally, in black slacks and a blazer over a white button-down, and his hair was greying. He steps aside to let the woman and her daughter in. 

You can hear a pin drop with how silent the house is. Not only that but if the exterior of the house was already too much to stomach, the interior was no different - high ceilings and stairs, as well as marble floors that caused Lydia and Anitta’s footsteps to bounce off the walls in echos, it was nerve-wracking. The furniture had an antique look to it but appeared luxurious nonetheless, and as Anitta looked up, a crystal chandelier could be seen dangling right above their heads, Anitta couldn’t wrap her head around it.

Too caught up in the beauty of it all, Anitta didn’t even register the looming presence of a man and a woman descending the stairs, piercing eyes drinking both her and Lydia in. Noticing her daughter’s lack of focus, she pinches Anitta’s arm, making the younger girl jump.

Then she stares. Hard. Because for a moment she thought the pair before her was a figment of her imagination. 

The man stood tall and stoic, with his black hair slicked back, he looked to be in his 40s. His build was broad by the shoulders but lean down the torso, stubble shadowing his strong jaw, which only complimented his dark brows and blue eyes. 

But the woman by his side… she looked straight out of a dream. With high cheekbones and full lips coated in a fiery red, it stood in stark contrast with her pin-straight, platinum-blonde hair that fell to her waist, which was cinched in an emerald green dress. It went along with her eyes, a nice hue of hazel. 

They were gorgeous. drop, dead, beautiful. It was almost infuriating. It only made sense that a house this grandiose would house even more beautiful people. 

She and Lydia seemed to have been in a trance the entire time and it was only then when the man in front of them spoke did they snapped out of it “Lydia Flores, yes?” 

The mother sputtered for a moment, incapable of forming a sentence all of a sudden “Y-yes. It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Claudius.” 

He smiled, the gesture not doing much to soften the sharpness of his features “Likewise. although you can refer to me as Pierre, and this-“ he then motions to the woman beside him “is my wife, Camilla.”

His eyes then turn to Anitta, who quickly ducks her head the second she realizes she is gawking “And this is your daughter, I presume?” 

Lydia nodded, grabbing Anitta by the arm “Yes. Anitta.”

Pierre hums “And seventeen as I can remember, just a bit younger than my daughter.”

Lydia’s eyes widen at that “You two have a daughter?” 

The couple nods “Pierre may have forgotten to mention, but she won’t be a bother. She prefers to stay in her room. Although we would still like you to meet her.” says Camilla. 

Before the mother and daughter could say anything, they jumped as Pierre’s voice cut through the atmosphere in an authoritative yell “Vivienne! Come down!”

It was quiet again for a while, not until the sound of a door opening and shutting softly resonated through the air, along with the soft padding of shoes.

Anitta didn’t consider herself a sociable person, she mostly kept to herself at school, always had her nose buried in between the pages of a book or scribbling down on her sketch pad. She made conversation with her peers, but she wouldn’t consider any of them as people she was close with. Not a lot of people her age were drawn to her, she was meek and blended easily with the crowd, always going by unnoticed.

So she doubts she’d make a good first impression on their daughter, who they claim to be introverted much like her. That serves as a good sign that she wouldn’t have to force herself to be polite and make friends.

But then there she was.

Suddenly, Anitta’s breath got stuck in her throat, frozen in place as a girl, who only seemed to be a few years older than her, descended the steps of the manor. Feet light as a feather but her presence… it was palpable. 

With jet black hair cascading down her shoulders in waves, her skin pale just like her parents, and eyes so blue Anitta felt like she could drown in them, she couldn’t help but stand there, mouth slightly parted as she drank her in. 

This beautiful, beautiful girl. So beautiful she felt it was unfair to be standing in the presence of someone so divine, it was dizzying. 

She was wearing a white, frilly dress with long sleeves that hugged her delicate wrists, along with a pair of black, leather doll shoes. She looked like she was made out of porcelain.

She kept her gaze down the entire time but as soon as she lifted her head, their eyes immediately met.

Not with her mother’s, but hers. It was as though they were drawn to each other like magnets. She was a head taller than Anitta, her expression neutral as she sized the blonde girl up. She felt small around her, squeamish even, she was shy but Vivienne made her wanna fold in on herself.

“Vivienne, this is Lydia and her daughter, Anitta. Lydia will be the one replacing Dolores from now on.” Camilla butts in as Vivienne nods her head.

“It’s nice to meet you,” she said cooly, her voice smooth like silk but having a deep timbre to it.

Anitta gulped as Vivienne’s eyes never seemed to leave hers, even when she looked away out of intimidation, they still lingered, shameless.

Later, the couple had to explain the routine and schedule Lydia had to abide by; what days of the week she needed to show up for, what time she needed to arrive, and what rooms of the house she was prohibited from entering, these rules were also applied to Anitta, if she chooses to accompany her mother in the time she works.

She wouldn’t be a stay-in as agreed. But if the circumstances call for it, if there were to be an emergency and the house needs monitoring, Lydia is to keep charge of the house and look after Vivienne.

There wasn’t much that they asked for. It was like any basic task former employers asked of her. Usual cooking and cleaning. She had to trim the lawn - which felt wearying given the expanse of it - and to keep the garden in check, and make sure the flowers never wilted. They were very particular about their plants, saying how they needed to be watered and fertilized in a specific way and time.

But Lydia was attentive, otherwise, she wouldn’t have landed the job. Pierre disclosed how Arthur got their connections by saying how he threw in a good word for her to one of the Claudius’ family friends, being their trusted butcher, he told them that Lydia was capable and adequate as soon as he heard that Dolores resigned and that the couple was looking for a replacement.

“I trust you’d do good by Arthur’s word. There’s not much to do here, you can wander about as much as you like, just keep off limits to the master’s bedroom and the third floor, as Clint already has those taken care of,” Clint being the man who welcomed them in the house earlier “Any more questions?”

Lydia smiled, shaking her head “No, sir.”

Pierre and Camilla hummed  “Very well then, you can start now. Lunchtime is near and Giselle has already finished cooking, you can just set the table, and after that, Clint will hand you the list of agendas for the day.”

Their eyes fall on Anitta “You can always help your mother if you wish to, sweet girl. But if you want you can wait by the garden while she works.“

Anitta nods “I-it’s okay thank you, I’ll just wait for my mom if that’s okay,”

“Just as long as you don’t cause any trouble,” whether she intended to say it as a warning, Camilla offered her a chilly smile that made her spine shiver.

“She can come with me.”

The adults whipped their heads to look at Vivienne, having spoken since she introduced herself an hour ago “To your room, darling?” Pierre asked, for some reason confused.

Vivienne didn’t stray her eyes away from the blonde “Yes. If that’s not an issue.” 

Her parents took a moment to process her request before they nodded, but rather hesitantly.

“Okay then, just as long as you take it easy on the girl,” Pierre joked, but the slight furrow between his brows was still visible.

And for the first time since they laid eyes on the other - she smiled. A soft, warm tug of her lips as she extended her hand, offering it to the girl who could only blink at the gesture before she met her gaze once more, body tense.

But as soon as their hands touched, with Vivienne reaching out to intertwine them, she jumped at the contact, mostly because Vivienne’s hands were so cold. Very cold.

However, the way she gripped her hand, almost as if she were luring the younger girl into a place unknown but inviting, made Anitta deflate. All tension left her system as Vivienne’s smile grew large.

“Come with me?”

Her smile was ever so warm, but much like the palm that enveloped Anitta’s, there was a certain coldness to them that never left. 

read chapter two here!

#vampire #wlw #original story #psychological thriller #sapphic #original characters