#like the 31 th chapter makes me question but still

[butterflydm]

wot reread: a memory of light (chapters 24-31)

spoilers for a memory of light, the final book.

Everything that Tuon thinks about her life really does sound like it's going to make Mat so miserable. All the obligatory pomp and circumstance, even in private (because you're never in private when you have slaves!). But, hey, he'll get rewarded with sex every time he saves Tuon's life, so who needs happiness? (/sarcasm)

Given how many truths about the Seanchan have been withheld from Mat in order to get him to this point, I wonder how many of those truths it would take for him to abandon ship?

Note: I am going to be questioning and interrogating Mat's actions, words, and behaviors a LOT going forward and not taking much at face value. And that kinda extends to people talking about him: what do they know and believe about him, etc? Whose PoV are we in when certain things are said or revealed, etc? This is mostly for two reasons: a. I am sussing out how much wiggle room there is for writing fic about Mat in this time period and b. I want to try to not make assumptions based on my first thoughts when I'm reading each PoV.

2. Beslan says that Mat has changed and "I don't know what to make of him any more." Beslan is all-in on the slavers now, which makes him a very great disappointment to me. I guess we can't be that surprised. He enabled his mom being a serial rapist, so I guess it shouldn't be a shock that he's willing to enable slavery as well. What Beslan says about Mat is... hmm. How well did Beslan ever know Mat, I guess is the question that immediately springs to mind. Beslan was the son of Mat's rapist, who allowed that his mom was maybe going too far with Mat but still was basically a momma's boy despite the rape. And the last time Mat saw Beslan, he was a revolutionary who was willing to stand up against the Seanchan even when his mother was not, so I suspect that he would also not be certain what to make of you, Beslan. Honestly, given that Beslan's last experience of Mat was "wants to escape Ebou Dar no matter what", the most surprising thing for him should be that Mat voluntarily returned to Ebou Dar.

But everything that Tuon thinks here about how Beslan and the Altaran people have been "properly tamed" does give me that gross feeling that she (and many of the Darkfriends in the series) gives me in her PoV chapters. If Mat could actually see her thought processes, all his fantasies about how she's Not Like the Other Seanchan would go up in smoke.

3. Selucia slightly shades Tuon on how she hasn't broken Mat to fully proper behavior yet (he's cursing at some news they've received) and Tuon immediately decides that she needs a new Truthspeaker so that Selucia can go back to being only her Voice (and not speak any opinions that aren't exactly your own, Tuon?).

An Empress must be "crafty", "strong", and "skilled" to sit on the Crystal Throne, Tuon thinks.

Ah, I guess that's why she died pretty quickly in Aviendha's alternate future. Tuon doesn't have any of those qualities. It is interesting to think about how Tuon pumps herself here up with an impossible goal: that she be strong enough to live forever (as the Empress is meant to do and yet how every single Empress has failed to do) so that she can bring 'order' to the world. Just as Fortuona is not living up to the fictional Tuon in Mat's head, she can't possibly live up to the Empress that she believes that she needs to be.

There really are hints, here and there, of the interesting character that Tuon could have been. She just needed so much more character work. I do think she's been more interesting under Sanderson so far, though, at least than she was in CoT & KoD.

4. At this moment in time, Tuon is regretting her marriage. Mat's fancy Seanchan uniform keeps snagging on everything that he passes and her other generals find him baffling. She married "chaos itself". This feels like another place where we're being told one thing and shown another. What has Mat actually DONE that is chaotic to Tuon's plans? He saved her life and advised that she not be stupid enough to actively try to sabotage Rand saving the world, but he didn't challenge her on anything or fight her on anything.

This really does show the all-or-nothing attitude of the Seanchan: Mat has bent so much to accommodate Tuon that he's practically unrecognizable to who he used to be but that's still not enough for her. Nothing but complete and eternal submission is enough for her. He can do everything she asks but if he doesn't have the right attitude about it, then she's still unhappy with him.

5. Oh, "the Prince of Ravens" thinks that they're joining the battle too late? MAYBE he shouldn't have deserted on the eve of the fucking Last Battle then? Sanderson suddenly inserting a feeling of urgency in Mat about getting to the Last Battle feels so ridiculous. Mat didn't give a shit about the Last Battle a couple of chapters ago. He ran away so that he could have some drinks in slaver town. The Last Battle has been happening for at least a week at this point.

Mat being someone who is creating urgency and rushing would make so much more sense if he'd gone to the Seanchan as a negotiator and not as a deserter.

We do get confirmation here that Mat is now the second-highest ranking member of the High Blood, after Tuon herself. And the mere fact that Tuon thinks here that he would "never be a rival" makes me feel like narrative irony would have insisted on him being the one who topples her from her throne.

6. This is when Tuon renames Mat as "bringer of destruction" (aka Knotai aka I am not using that name in this reread ever again). Mat deciding that he likes being dubbed a "bringer of destruction" is another thing that feels bizarrely out of character but I will note that this is all in Tuon PoV, so we don't know how Mat actually feels about the name (I'm pretty sure he doesn't start calling himself that in his head at any point). And we've seen that Tuon has a very difficult time reading Mat, so if he was giving off any tells that he was lying, she would certainly never pick up on it. She glares at him after the renaming and wills him not to argue with it, so his response might be Mat picking up on her cues and responding.

"The Pattern had placed [Mat] before her, had shoved him into her arms." It sure fucking did and it was so incredibly annoying to read.

Tuon also does (internally) note here that Rand was 100% correct about how fragile her rule here is.

Haha, after Selucia uses their handtalk to call Tuon out on the risks she's taking, Tuon thinks again that she needs to replace Selucia as a Truthspeaker so that Selucia can go back to being a good little parrot and stop having opinions (this is a mild paraphrase of her thoughts).

7. Ah, this moment is in Tuon's PoV but it actually does still manage to be pretty clear exactly how much she is disappointing Mat when she considers the idea of going back on her word and swooping down on the Aes Sedai to capture them all as damane rather than going to aid them as allies. That's the moment of Actual Fortuona failing to live up to the Fictional Tuon in Mat's head that I was remembering. Back during either TGS or ToM, Mat realizes that it was likely that Tuon didn't stay in CoT & KoD because she was being honorable and keeping her word but instead was staying because of the prophecy about him she'd gotten, but he kinda just ignored the implications of that realization.

The mere fact that Tuon considers the idea of breaking her word here would remind Mat that her word is meaningless (and Mat has developed, as we have established, a fey-like obsession with keeping his word). It is interesting how Tuon thinks of herself as the embodiment of order and yet so easily considers throwing away a treaty and going back on her word; yet she considers Mat the embodiment of chaos when he does his best to always live by his word no matter what the personal cost. Mat probably would push it away again here (she does make the right choice when it comes down to it) but it's another place where Actual Fortuona would be a disappointment when compared to Fictional Tuon in Mat's head.

Ultimately, when Tuon decides to keep her word, it isn't out of honor but due to the omens telling her to bet on Mat.

I will note at this point in time that Mat is still being informal and using "Tuon" freely.

8. We get a glimpse of how pressed things are on Lan's part of the battlefield before shifting over to Elayne's. Birgitte tries to keep Elayne in the command tent and Elayne finally snaps, telling her that if Birgitte can't follow her orders like all the other soldiers are willing to do, then she will release their bond. I'm sure Elayne gets hate for this, because she gets hate for everything, but I found it very cathartic after how much Birgitte has been getting on my nerves in this book. And Elayne's right that she's more useful out there doing things -- she is an extremely powerful channeler. It is a waste of her talents for her to sit in a tent.

9. Hmm, yeah, as Rand enters Shayol Ghul itself, he notes that time is affecting him differently. He can tell that one of the women that he's bonded to is in pain but he can't tell who it is and he worries over Elayne and Aviendha.

Though the knife worked to shield Rand from the Dark One's eyes, Moridin is still waiting for him there. I wonder how long he's just been kneeling there. So, yeah, before Rand can get to the Dark One, he has to take care of Moridin.

Anyway, we learned in Siuan's PoV just before this that Min was sent to the Aes Sedai camp with the message "The Seanchan fight the Shadow." You know, I like that message because it doesn't overpromise anything and it doesn't set up expectations that the Seanchan won't be absolute douchebags, as they certainly will be.

10. Luc Mantear and Isam Mandragoran's story as Slayer really could have been heartbreaking and fascinating if Jordan had ever actually leaned into the implications of it. They're both essentially collateral damage -- Isam was left behind when the Blight swallowed up Malkier; Luc was sent off into the Blight to 'seek glory' in order to help wedge an opening for the Mantears to be pushed off the throne of Andor. But the books never explore that.

As it is, Slayer is just... this disconnected assassin who shows up once in a blue moon, and there's not really any substance there to hook onto.

After a... really long battle involving Slayer and the red-veiled Aiel channelers, Perrin fails to kill Slayer and Slayer ends up escaping. Lanfear shows up to heal Perrin and she continues to seem vaguely irritated that she's interacting with him ("You can be such a child"). He sets the dreamspike up inside the cavern to protect Rand and asks the wolves to guard the outside of the cavern (this is all in TAR).

11. Egwene feels so gross as she heads towards the meeting that she is about to have with the Seanchan, because she knows that the Seanchan fighting means damane fighting, which means forcing slaves into battle.

Tuon sits on her mobile throne, with a train being held by eight slaves in transparent robes. Literally every time Tuon's lifestyle is described, it just sounds like something that is going to make Mat so incredibly miserable.

lol, the narrative tries to convince us that Tuon is "calculating" and "discerning" through Egwene's description of her eyes. I've been in the girl's head. I'll grant you "manipulative" and "can spot an obvious clue when it's shoved under her nose" but that's as far as I'll go. Egwene, you were absolutely right when you assumed that Tuon would be coddled and spoiled. I speak as someone who was forced through two long books of "a brat goes on a circus tour and throws several tantrums".

12. Anyway, both Egwene and Tuon feel contempt for each other -- Tuon for what Egwene inherently is as a person (a channeler) and Egwene for the person that Tuon chooses to be (a slaver).

Which we can see in the way they talk to each other -- Tuon calls Egwene an animal, while Egwene calls Tuon a criminal who would be at home with murderers and rapists. Tuon sees what Egwene is as the problem with her, while Egwene sees who Tuon is as the issue with her. These are not the same as each other.

13. So here on page 471 (hardback version), Mat has finally shown up to the Last Battle. Over halfway into the book! Literally makes me want to stab a wall that Mat spent half the book just fucking around with slavers instead of helping with the Last Battle. I assume we're supposed to feel like the Seanchan coming to help would be impossible without Mat, because he shamed Tuon into actually keeping her word, but there were better roads of getting Mat there that didn't make him a deserter and a defector. But I'm guessing making Mat those things was the point of his impossible teleportation logistics between books.

Just. Ugh.

14. The reason that Egwene realizes that Mat is here, among the collection of "frozen Blood in various poses" around Tuon, is because Tuon turns to berate him for not telling her that Egwene was once captured as damane and thus making her show her ass in public when she tried to argue that Egwene would understand how great being a slave is if only she'd tried it.

The question I have here is: are we supposed to believe Mat when he claims that he only didn't tell Tuon about Egwene having been captured as damane because he 'didn't think on it too long' that Egwene's captivity had happened. It's in Egwene's PoV so we are, once again, not in Mat's head. The main good quality that Mat has been able to hold onto when he's been around the Seanchan has been keeping his friends' secrets. tbh it seems more likely to me that he just didn't think it was Tuon's business (it would have been a pretty big betrayal of Egwene's privacy for him to confide that in Tuon, imo?). But, yeah, Tuon explicitly says here that she is going to have a "not pleasant" conversation with Mat about him holding back information on her. And it pretty clearly comes across as a threat.

Yikes.

15. Egwene does seem to believe here that Tuon has made a grave mistake by marrying Mat... but it's explicitly because Mat is ta'veren and Tuon has trapped herself into his web. And it amuses her because she assumes it can't mean anything good for Tuon or the Seanchan in the long term. (I mean, given that Mat has gotten hundreds of thousands of people killed on the Westlands side... yeah, it does seem like a lot of dead Seanchan are in the future on Tuon's side, and Mat might never even realize he was the enabling factor). So this is the one time that I'll allow for a character to be amused that Mat has married a slaver -- Egwene clearly sees this as Tuon having screwed herself over in the future without realizing it.

Though Mat does throw out a "may she live forever" (eyeroll), he is also still calling her 'Tuon', despite the threat of execution. And note that Mat is still of the opinion that "being ta'veren has never gotten me much" so he doesn't seem particularly happy about being married.

16. Yeah, Tuon also makes it very clear that the new clothes and the new name are deliberate attempts to separate Mat away from his past connections and make it clear that Tuon owns him now. "He serves the Seanchan, the Crystal Throne, and the Empress."

She is isolating him from his previous friends and making it clear that he belongs to her. Egwene is 100% right in her instincts that he needs to be saved from Tuon, even if Mat himself doesn't realize it (or, potentially, does realize it but isn't willing to admit to it).

17. So Egwene has to renegotiate with Tuon because now that Rand is gone, Tuon is forcing everyone to start from page one with her again, because she is a coddled and spoiled brat who wants to eke out more concessions if she can get them.

But the results of Tuon attempting to re-negotiate with Egwene now that Rand is off on his mission actually ends up backfiring on Tuon overall, I think! -- Egwene gets Tuon to agree to leave Tremalking alone (because they haven't found a compliant Sea Folk leader along the lines of Beslan to lend them legitimacy) and Egwene makes a spirited attempt to get Tuon to agree to allow women who have just been discovered but not yet collared the opportunity to choose to go the White Tower instead, leaning on Tuon's stated belief that marath'damane want to be slaves so it's no big deal to offer them the option of freedom.

But Tuon does balk at this idea, unfortunately, because she gets scared when Egwene mentions that all sul'dam are marath'damane.

18. Egwene, because she actually is discerning and calculating, picked up on what Tuon said about having trained damane herself and says, in front of the Blood, that as a sul'dam, Tuon is capable of channeling. Which Tuon already knows -- she learned this in KoD -- but she calls Egwene a liar because living in denial is the only way she can keep her power base and nothing matters more to Tuon than sucking up all the power in the world. It really does suck so much that we came up to the brink of Something Actually Happening with the Seanchan storyline and then backed away like cowards. There will never be any outriggers! Pull off the damn bandaid while the books are still running!

We don't get any mention of the Blood or the various damane & sul'dam who are around reacting to this bit of information either, but they do hear Egwene call ~their Empress~ out on being a liar, and call their Empire out on being a machine of cruelty that tortures women into fates worse than death. Will that matter? Who the fuck knows. Maybe one or two of the Blood here will feel a pang of conscience, as Leilwin née Egeanin did, and begin the slow and painful process of changing. Or maybe not.

And it is satisfying to get to see someone calling Tuon out on what a hypocrite she is -- she's all for preaching that other people should get put into the collar because they're just ~meant~ to be slaves but of course she wouldn't do it to herself. Of course she wouldn't. The idea terrifies her to death, I'm sure. Which also shows how deeply in denial she is when she claims that marath'damane just naturally want to be collared and anything other than that is a weird outlier. She knows damn well that it isn't true, because she doesn't long for the collar herself. But if she stuffs her fingers in her ears and just shouts that she's not marath'damane loudly enough, she can make herself believe it.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that Tuon did not go into this conversation looking to be publicly accused of being marath'damane herself, especially not in front of a crowd of Blood, so I feel like this one was a win for Egwene.

19. When things get to be really heated between Egwene & Tuon, with Egwene embracing the Power, Mat intercedes. What Mat says here is gross and demeaning; and I think we can all agree on that (a threat to take them over "over his knee" as if that would even be possible in this situation), but Egwene doesn't take it seriously for a second because she can see that Mat is trying to deflect her and Tuon away from each other and onto him (also frustrating though, because I really wanted something to Actually Happen with Tuon).

Also, we get a reminder that Tuon is a big ol' liar about not being jealous over Mat and other women, because she stares at where Mat's hand is touching Egwene's chest until he lowers his hand.

It also leads to another threat from Tuon about how she and Mat will have "many words" tonight, but they do both back down. But, wow, Tuon is so jealous over Egwene here, which is hilarious from the perspective of actually knowing anything about Egwene and Mat's friendship.

(sadly, I must take away Egwene's right to be amused at Mat's marriage at this point in the conversation, when she bizarrely attempts to commiserate ??? with Tuon over Mat's foul language)

Also, I will note that Egwene offers to help free him from the Seanchan, Mat doesn't tell her that he doesn't need to be freed, he tells her that he can handle it on his own. Slightly different things. Do you have an exit strategy, Mat?

Egwene is still determined to help Mat get free of the Seanchan somehow. AU idea where she does!

So, Mat leaves with Tuon and we know that she plans to have a 'not pleasant' conversation with him. So I will mark that in my notes to keep in mind the next time we see Mat.

20. As we've been going through the various battlefields, the 'great captains' have continued to make bone-headed mistakes. As we return to Elayne, it seems like this is coming to a head, as Tam confronts Bashere.

(and, no, she doesn't think about how Tam is Rand's dad and will be her kid's grandfather. Why would she, apparently?)

Tam accuses Bashere of not using scouts and falsifying scouting reports instead, saying that Bashere is to blame for the bad tactics that have happened in the recent battles. After considering how badly they've been trapped by the Shadowspawn, Elayne orders Bashere relieved from duty and has Talmanes take him away with the Band's Redarms.

And now Elayne is the one leading the army here, not Bashere.

21. Bryne gets one right for calling Tuon "that Imperial monster of a Seanchan leader". I have to admit, so far, there is less of the "let's hold hands with the Seanchan" vibe that I remembered and more "ugh, fuck, I guess we gotta hold our noses and deal with the Seanchan" vibe, at least in most chapters. It's really Mat's bizarro-world PoVs that tend to throw everything else off, and Mat has been kept ignorant of the Seanchan's recent actions under Tuon's guidance.

Bryne actually made Min do some real work by having her clerk for one of his people! Okay, Bryne has two rights. This is the first time Min has done any real work in what feels like forever. Being away from Rand is already doing her some good. But now the tent she was working in has been destroyed, so he puts her to work as a messenger (Min actually volunteers, which is definitely better than how she behaved when she was with Rand).

I kinda feel like my own opinion of the romances in WoT does hinge pretty strongly on "do they become less interesting characters when they are spending time with [love interest]?" but also on "what else do they have going on besides being [main character]'s love interest?".

ex. I liked Min best in TSR and once she starts really one-note obsessing over Rand in TFoH and onward, my interest in her nosedives because it feels like she has zero interests or drives outside of Rand. Get a hobby, Min! One that isn't about Rand (so the interest in 'philosophy' doesn't count). There's this incredibly depressing scene in, I think it was TFOH but it might have been the very start of LoC, where Elayne wants to talk to Min about something other than Rand and Min is just completely incapable of turning off the Rand-obsession long enough to think of a single good thing that doesn't revolve around Rand-Rand-Rand (the scene was not meant to be depressing but it definitely made me go 'yikes, Min, please get literally anything in your life that isn't about Rand').

22. So Min is off to the "Seanchan Empress" to tell her to send cavalry to the battlefield. Because Tuon is currently doing her best to hold back as many of her forces as she can and is negotiating them out piece-meal.

When she arrives at the Seanchan camp, Min notes how many forces are just lazing around doing nothing when they could be helping in the Last Battle. Min thinks for a moment that she wishes that she could have gone with Rand to Shayol Ghul but she has finally realized that she's only a liability to him in situations like that. Finally. I do note that apparently Rand had to 'forbid' her from going, though, so if he'd let her, she would have happily been a liability to him.

Anyway, Min was told by Rand to keep an eye on Fortuona, so I'll keep that in mind.

23. "Speak what criticism one would about the Seanchan -- and Min had a number of things she could add to that conversation -- they certainly were organized."

I really wish that Sanderson actually let Min think some of her specific criticisms about the Seanchan here rather than the narration veiling it. Because the way this is written ends up praising without critique, because the criticism remains politely unvoiced. One must always be polite about the slavers who want to dehumanize your friends and your lover, I guess.

Min was in Falme with Egwene! She actually saw Egwene being punished! She was even blamed for some of Egwene's punishments (which were all Renna's fault, of course, and not Min's) and she listened to Egwene scream and cry out in agony.

Let Min actually remember some of that in the text here rather than sweeping it all under the rug! She knows that the da'covale are slaves, for example, because she was in Falme. But instead of calling them slaves, she calls them "immodestly-dressed young women". Let Min actually have a thought here about how she disapproves of slavery! Put that on the record!

And Min thinking here that the Seanchan "couldn't possibly be as prickly as the Aiel". You... you literally listened to Egwene weeping in pain while she was being tortured for such crimes as "wanting to keep her own name" and "not wanting to be a slave" and "letting her friend visit her". wtf, Min.

24. Min has never seen Mat's hat before, but she thinks here that he has topped his new silken Seanchan outfit with his "familiar hat". I really do wonder if there was a draft of AMoL where Mat was in Merrilor, because then Min and Mat would have had a chance to meet back when Mat was in his old clothes and it would make sense for her to recognize his hat here. Because as it is, that's literally a nonsense thing for Min to think. The last time she saw Mat was at the end of book 2. Mat got his hat during book 4.

Min and Mat reunite like old buddies. They barely know each other. Let's tot up the times that they've met:

off-the-page in-between TGH and TDR, while Mat was dying from the dagger, in the handful of days that Mat was there before Verin took him & Elayne, Egwene, & Nynaeve off to the White Tower

That's it. That's the only entry. Mat didn't meet her in Baerlon -- Rand told him about her afterward. Apart from that, their only possible knowledge of each other comes from what Rand might have passed along. It is genuinely bizarre that they are behaving like old friends. They met once, almost two years ago, when one of them was dying. Mat has seen her having sex with Rand from time to time in his color swirl visions, but Min doesn't have access to that. They missed seeing each other in Caemlyn by four days, because Rand sends Mat off to Salidar before Min shows up with the embassy. They are the next best thing to complete strangers to each other, except that Mat has unintentionally seen Min naked several times.

It's Min and Perrin who have a friendship. It's funny, how Sanderson buffed up Perrin's friendships with Rand & Mat, but erased Perrin's friendship with Min. Perrin and Min, per canon, spent a lot of time talking to each other in between TGH & TDR (more time than either of them spent with Rand, who spent most of his time either brooding alone or arguing with Moiraine).

This is definitely "writing to the epilogue" convenience. But it could have made sense if Mat and Min had met back in the early chapters of the book while Mat was in Merrilor after he'd returned with Moiraine & Thom.

25. Mat tries to press Min for any new viewings about him. That's... interesting. Someone wants a new fate? I'm feeling curious about how Mat and Tuon's 'not pleasant' conversation went. Min deflects the conversation to viewings about the Seanchan general and I really don't care. Except to note that, sadly, Galgan probably won't try to kill Tuon because Mat is now the next one in the line of succession.

26. Why in the world would Min bow to Tuon? Seriously, girl, wtf. This is what I mean about how the narrative itself feels like it tiptoes around Tuon. Why would Min care so much about respecting Seanchan titles and nobility? She thinks here that she doesn't care about any other nobility but somehow the word 'Empress' triggers the worship reflex in her hindbrain or something? wtf. "It was only proper to show respect to Fortuona". Literally why? Why is the emphasis in Min's chapter about being polite to the slavers? Why is that the overriding vibe of this section -- Min's desire to make a good impression on the slavers? She didn't try this hard (or at all) with the Aiel. It's things like this that make me feel like Tuon must be ta'veren, because that feels like a thought that Tuon just plopped into Min's brain without permission.

Also, after Tuon enters literally just as Mat has mentioned her to Min, Mat then quotes "Say the name of Darkness, and his eye is upon you". Um. Yeah. So I feel like that 'not pleasant' conversation didn't go very well. (*whispers* he just compared his wife to the Dark One */whispers*).

He is also still using "Tuon" in casual conversation. And he doesn't get down on the floor, even though everyone else (including Min, for whatever reason) does.

27. And Mat is straight-up baiting Tuon in this conversation, or at least it feels that way (and using Min as a weapon while he does it). Yeah, I get the feeling that 'not pleasant' conversation went extremely poorly (was telling Tuon that Min is "the Dragon Reborn's woman" his way of trying to protect her from being poached by Tuon but Min didn't pick up on it? or was it his way of assuaging Tuon's raging jealousy issues by letting her know that Min is 'taken' and Mat doesn't plan on screwing her?)

I almost wonder if he's testing Tuon here -- seeing if her threats have any teeth? She told him that she could have him killed if he kept using the name 'Tuon' and he has not stopped, not even after the 'not pleasant' conversation. Kinda interesting that Mat seems considerably more combative with Tuon after their 'not pleasant' private discussion than he ever has been before. Wish we'd gotten to see that conversation (important moments, etc.).

Mat warns Min that Tuon snatches people up and doesn't let them go -- Min here thinks that Mat sounds "almost proud" but tbh I don't give Min much credit for her insight into people so I will take that with a grain of salt -- and yet Min (who can never resist blabbing about her viewings to everyone in sight) immediately spills about a viewing that someone is going to try to kill Tuon.

Literally why in the world would she bother to say anything? Why would she do this to herself? Rand said nothing about going out of her way to save the head slaver's life.

Min does have the habit of being swept up by people who have stronger personalities than she does -- Moiraine, then Siuan, then Rand, then Cadsuane, and now Tuon, I guess.

I do have to crack up at Min lying to herself and saying that she hasn't accidentally blabbed a viewing in years. Even if she doesn't remember blabbing Elayne's pregnancy to the entire royal palace of Caemlyn, she sleepily blabbed out Melaine's pregnancy without thinking about it too and we know she remembers that one because it was the whole basis for why the Wise Ones treated her as an ~honorary Wise One~ for, like, two books.

If Min didn't already have an established habit of constantly talking about her viewings, I would chalk this up to Tuon being ta'veren as well but... she does.

28. Tuon just goes up and touches Min's face without permission. Probably thinking about checking her teeth. Anyway, she pronounces Min a 'Doomseer' and Min has just screwed herself for the foreseeable future.

Tuon views Min as a "gift" that Mat has given her to "pay your penance" (presumably for not volunteering information about Egwene) so... yeah, that gives us some insight into the 'not pleasant' conversation. I wonder if Mat will think back to it at all in the next PoV we get from him. Probably not. I feel like I would remember that.

Tuon names Min as her new Truthspeaker, probably thrilled that she can now shove Selucia back into the box of not having any opinions that Tuon hasn't told her to have. Her emotional support slave was having too many independent thoughts and we can't have that.

Anyway, Min's viewings never really helped Rand, so she probably won't actually help Tuon much either, so I guess that's a relief.

But, yeah, not a fun situation for Min. Though I guess Mat now has company in his hellhole of a prison, so there's that.

...okay, now I've got "Two Lost Souls" from Damn Yankees in my head.

29. Just as Tam picked up on how Bashere's 'tactical mistakes' keep helping the Shadowspawn in the last section, Lan has picked out the same when it comes to his own 'great captain' -- two reserve forces were both sent to shore up the same hole in the lines, resulting in confusion and also the ranks being too thin in other places.

30. So, yeah, the set-up continues for Team Light to be forced to trust the General of the Slavers with the armies despite his recent horrible life choices. We note here that it has been 'weeks' for Lan now.

Lan countermands Agelmar's latest order, as he's realized how badly it would expose part of their army and compromise any potential retreat, so Lan has de facto taken over the army here, just as Elayne has over in the Cairhien/Caemlyn section of the battle.

31. Mat lets us know here Min has also been re-dressed in fancy Seanchan clothes. Apparently without any attempt to stick in her own clothes? She's an 'honored holy woman' per Tuon, so you would imagine means she has leverage to wear her own clothes if she wants. (of course, if it doesn't give her any leverage, then that would be useful information for the reader to have)

Anyway, we are back in Mat's head, for the first time since his disappointing reunion scene with Rand. We've seen him from the outside a few times since then -- in Tuon, Egwene, and finally Min's eyes.

Mat announces that he needs to go out and look at the actual battlefield. He thinks in his head that it's because the maps are "too simplistic" but I wonder if part of his motivation is taking a chance and getting some fresh air while his ~slaver bride~ is off doing "some empressly duty". I'm still curious about that 'not pleasant' conversation of 'many words' that they had after Tuon and Egwene met. He also yanks off part of his 'Seanchan uniform' here, leaving himself in his scarf, medallion, and breeches. He'd rather walk around shirtless than wear the fancy Seanchan duds, it seems.

(this life is going to make him so miserable)

32. Yeah, Min is now wearing a dress, with no apparent protest. Mat notes that she's pretty and then additionally notes that he needs to be careful with smiles around women now because his wife might stab him if he smiles too much at other women. So, yeah, I'm thinking part of the 'not pleasant' conversation was Tuon making her jealousy issues very very clear to Mat. But despite Mat's protests that hooking up with Rand means that Min is "practically his sister", his narration does make it clear that he's attracted to her.

(this life is going to make him so miserable)

"Mat had always considered Min on the boyish side" - you met her one time! During the foggy period of your memory when you were dying! The narration really is behaving like Perrin and Mat's friendships have been swapped around in this book -- Perrin is the one who has the stronger friendships with Rand and Elayne now; while Mat now has the stronger friendship with Min. Before this book, the opposite was true of all of those things. I guess we can assume that this is about Rand & Min screwing in the color swirls but Min would have been at least partly naked for a lot of those.

33. Anyway, Mat had his own clothes hidden away and changes into them now, when Tuon isn't here to protest, and then sneaks off to look at the battlefield before she can come back to berate him again. Lessons learned from his time with Tylin?

(Min does say here that she's tempted to strip off too, but she keeps wearing the Seanchan clothes for whatever reason)

We do also learn here the very important information that the Seanchan guards respond to bribes (Mat bribed them into keeping and hiding his clothes for him here). Though Mat also notes that it's only the free guards and not the slaves.

34. It's so sad here that Mat has to feel grateful that Tuon "understood that [Mat] needed" the foxhead medallion and returned it to him. He's grateful that he's allowed to use his own personal items and that she didn't permanently keep what she'd stolen from him.

(this life is going to make him so miserable)

...hmm. I'm going to keep an eye on the medallions. Because technically Mat has two right now (his original and a copy that Elayne made), but he hasn't mentioned the second one at all.

35. Sadly, going for Pips means that "unfortunately, someone had time to alert" Tuon that Mat was slipping away, and so she comes to confront him (so I was right about part of the reason behind him bailing on the command tent was trying to get away from Tuon).

Mat once again warns Min that it's very dangerous here: "they know how to treat a fellow, as long as they don't behead him. I'm still trying to figure out how to prevent that from happening."

Hmm, Mat gives Min the "sell" on staying with the Seanchan... he says that it would help Rand because she can attempt to mislead Tuon about her 'omens' to try to guide Tuon onto a less-awful path. I imagine that's how Mat is justifying his own choices too but we saw that when he actually had a chance to try to guide Tuon onto a better path, he froze and said nothing while Rand did all the negotiating. But Mat does make it clear here that he still disapproves of what the Seanchan are doing; he's just... sticking around and helping anyway for whatever reason.

But, yeah, "lie to Tuon to try to subtly direct her choices" being part of Mat's advice to Min is... illuminating, to be sure. Did Mat lie to/mislead Tuon during their recent 'not pleasant' private discussion?

36. Yeah, we see here very directly that Mat doesn't always mean what he says around Tuon, when he pretends to be happy that she's coming along with him to survey the battlefield while "groaning inside". This is what I was talking about back when I was questioning all of the other character's interpretations of Mat's behavior in the previous few chapters -- most of the characters in the books are not very good at reading Mat. Tuon has failed to accurately judge him on multiple occasions, Egwene will always at least partly see him as the troublemaker from her hometown, and Min barely knows him.

Also, Mat was expecting to be berated for changing his clothes but Tuon says nothing about it at this time. Hey, Min, maybe you should take the opportunity to change yours too?

It is good to see Mat attempting to push back on Tuon, even if it's on relatively minor things.

It really is the decision to make Mat a deserter that screwed his characterization over so hard in this book. If Mat had gone to Merrilor and then gone to Ebou Dar, pretty much everything would make more sense. There's only a couple of scenes so far that have 'needed' Mat to be a willing traitor in order to play out the way that they did (mostly just Egwene's shock at seeing him hanging out with the Seanchan) and almost everything else would make more sense if Mat had gone back to Ebou Dar as a negotiator on behalf of the Westlands.

37. On the minus side, we have some really weird stuff here where Mat dehumanizes one of the Seanchan generals for the crime of being a woman that he doesn't want to fuck. While Mat did start basically thinking about every woman that he met in terms of fuckability back around... A Crown of Swords, I want to say... he didn't act like 'not being fuckable' made women unpeople and he's kinda going that way here and it's super gross.

38. On her own front in the battlefield, Egwene sees a huge tactical blunder by Bryne that leaves one of their flanks wide-open to the enemy and vulnerable, and now she is also going to go question him, as it looked distinctly like he set up a trap that benefited the Shadowspawn. So that's all of the fronts except Ituralde (who is just outside of Shayol Ghul).

After questioning Agelmar, Lan suspects it is Compulsion that is behind his recent poor battle decisions, and Lan has him relieved from duty. Also, Tenobia conveniently gets killed on the battlefield and brings Faile one step closer to ruling Saldaea.

39. Back with Mat, Tuon, Min, and Selucia. Poor Selucia. She got half a book of being allowed to have her own opinions but now she's just Tuon's Voice/bodyguard again and gets to speak no words but Tuon's.

Min is obediently telling Tuon all her viewings and her interpretations of them, just like she always does when she's under the thumb of someone with a more forceful personality than her own. This is kinda why I feel like Mat's hope that she will lead Tuon onto better paths is likely not going to pan out -- because Min's viewings do not have a moral component, not that we're aware of, and she is spilling them all out indiscriminately.

And Tuon will likely continue to be her own horrible self, no matter what viewings Min has. But I guess we'll see how that relationship plays out.

Min has not only told Tuon all the viewings she had about Tuon but also her viewings about Mat, over Mat's protests. Min likes to claim that she doesn't do things like that, but wow, she does it all the time. It does feel like fandom doesn't really acknowledge that both Min & Perrin lie about themselves in their own heads just as much as Mat or Nynaeve do. Min believes that she's discreet about her viewings, when she's a blabbermouth most of the time, and Perrin believes that he thinks things through before he acts, when he's actually wildly reckless and impulsive pretty frequently.

40. It's interesting that Min and Mat greeted each other like old friends yet are now essentially working at cross-purposes -- Mat suggested to Min that ('for Rand') she mislead Tuon in order to craft a narrative that would make Tuon soften towards Aes Sedai (and also more minor things like "try to get her to stop wanting to get rid of my hat") but Min, like Galad, wants to be rigidly honest and is telling Tuon everything, not giving a care that she's telling Tuon other people's secrets (and we know she's telling real secrets, because she's now told Tuon all of Mat's old viewings that we know from before, against Mat's express wishes). So Min is essentially unintentionally teaching Mat that she is not an ally to him and that she will sell him out to Tuon if he confides in her. Which means that Mat is, once again, all alone in the middle of an enemy camp that he feels obligated to stay in (now matter how unhappy it makes him) Because Wife.

Mat and Tuon really is peak "enforced heterosexual monogamy" culture. They explicitly are married due not to their own desires but to external pressures (the prophecies) and feel obligated to stick it out even though, on Tuon's side, she feels like she has a wildly chaotic husband that she doesn't know how to control and, on Mat's side, everything about the situation is constantly making him miserable. I believe he thinks at one point (in some future chapter?) that he could be happy if it was just him and Tuon in a life far away from the Seanchan but... that really is him picturing himself and his Fictional Tuon character (not cold, not possessive, Not Like The Other Seanchan) rather than himself and Actual Fortuona. I'm sure Mat and his fake Tuon could find happiness running away from the throne, but fake Tuon doesn't exist so... yeah.

41. Mat is able to get "five minutes" by himself and rides down to talk to Perrin's slaver BFF Tylee. Much like Egwene had just realized, Mat learns here from Tylee that Bryne is making bad calls that are compromising his army.

*sigh*

Mat stuffs himself into Seanchan armor at this point. Well, he had a spine about wearing his own clothing for, like, five minutes. Maybe that's all we can hope for out of him these days. It is at least real 'on the field' armor rather than the ceremonial silk this time.

Also: Tuon's desire to constantly be keeping an eye on Mat vs Mat's desire to have some breathing room seems like a fight in their marriage that is going to reoccur a lot.

42. Anyway, Mat goes to personally take a unit out to relieve Bryne's soldiers because it looks like they've gotten very bad orders and he needs to correct them personally. I... don't have an issue with this apart from the whole "ugh, Seanchan" thing? Mat can see that the battle is going extremely poorly and wants to investigate from the inside because from what he can see, it looks like the general in charge is deliberately ordering bad tactics. That's not something that Mat can fix simply by sending contrary orders because he is not the main general of this battlefield. Bryne is. So Mat going out to take direct control of a specific part so that he can, essentially, undermine Bryne's bad orders before he goes to deal with the root of the issue makes sense because this is a time-sensitive situation.

Tylee tries to give Mat some damane slaves for the battle and he refuses.

Once again, like it did in Min's PoV, the narrative has yet another character praise the Seanchan's sense of organization while implying that the character has critiques about the Seanchan but not mentioning the specific issues that they have. Actually let Mat share his critiques about the Seanchan with the reader! Stop veiling the critiques behind "oh, I have some issues but I won't say what they are".

43. Mat is really really attracted to the enemy Sharan channeler. Until she tries to kill him but, yeah, he literally stops and stares at the channeler on the opposing side. Though that doesn't stop him from knocking her out with his spear when her weaves fail on him and he's able to get close.

*resigned sigh*

After this battle, Mat is now willing to throw damane slaves at the enemy.

Mat has also really really impressed the Ever Victorious Army. Something to keep in mind for post-canon 'Mat conducts a coup' thoughts. Between Egwene feeling like Tuon has accidentally gotten herself trapped in Mat's ta'veren web, Tuon's own "[Mat] would never be a rival" thoughts, how swiftly Mat is winning over the officers, and Mat's own words to Min about how she should craft a narrative to deceive Tuon into behaving the way she wants her to behave... there are some interesting puzzle pieces here for a post-canon "Mat deposes Tuon and takes over the Seanchan Empire" or "Mat tricks Tuon into thinking she's in charge while he's the real power in the Empire" storyline.

I really wish that Sanderson & Team Jordan hadn't made Mat a deserter at the start of the book; it really did start Mat off on such a bad foot, narratively-speaking, by weighting him so heavily on the side of the slavers without any kind of narrative justification for the choice (we still don't know how Mat got to Ebou Dar originally -- Sanderson really was like "okay, it makes no sense, so I'll just let readers fill in a reason that they can justify to themselves"). But even with that massive off-the-page weighting on the side of the slavers, Mat is listing back towards the Westlands side of things (as he has done time and time again). Over and over, Mat gets forcibly yanked over towards the Seanchan and then starts drifting away from them again (requiring another heavy-handed course-correction from the Authors).

44. Mat does change back into his "Two Rivers" coat here. ...wait, Mat's coat is a "Two Rivers" coat? When did that happen? When did Mat go back to the Two Rivers to get a coat? Or did he get it from Perrin's army? Anyway, he did change back into his own clothes after the battle.

Oh! Oh, this must be a coat that Elayne's person picked out for him (as per his request in ToM)! Elayne's person found him a Two Rivers coat? She really is magic. I love her.

Mat does realize here that the Sharan channeler that he captured is almost certainly going to end up damane. Should have just killed her.

45. Tuon is currently so pissed at Mat that she's only speaking to him through Selucia (now back in her role as Tuon's opinionless Voice). Mat notes this as a 'bad sign' but he also does keep calling her Tuon. Maybe he doesn't back down and start referring to her formally as she told him to do; maybe that was something that my memory was incorrect on, which would be nice.

"Your life is no longer your own," Tuon tells him through Selucia. I wonder if that's also part of the reason that Mat went out on the battlefield -- a way of declaring that his life is his own, even if that means potentially throwing it away.

Mat references Nynaeve here -- I'm not sure whether or not Tuon got Nynaeve's name in the conversation she had with Rand and Nynaeve back in TGS. I'll go check.

Yep, Rand says Nynaeve's name when she chastises him for trying to pretend that he doesn't care about Mat in front of Tuon. So Tuon knows that Mat is talking about a channeler here.

46. Yikes. Tuon 'gives' the Sharan channeler that Mat captured to him as his own personal damane slave. He tries to give her back to Tuon (also gross and yikes) but Tuon won't let him. Mat does refer to her as a channeler and not marath'damane but... ugh. But this is the continuation of Tuon's campaign to brainwash and integrate Mat into being fully-Seanchan, so her actions here are no surprise.

Mat is now given control of the Seanchan armies over Galgan, and they send Min back to Egwene to tell her that Bryne is helping the Shadow with how he's behaving with the army.

47. So things are incredibly dire and yet there have been no thoughts of "wow wish Mat were here to blow the Horn of Valere". It's so bizarre that everyone is just completely chill with a powerful artifact that is literally meant for the Last Battle to be just hanging out unusable!

Anyway, the Black Tower Asha'man show up here to relieve Elayne's people, who are sorely pressed.

Here's my thought: I think Sanderson was too much in love with the whole "on the very edge of being broken, the cavalry shows up" idea aka Gandalf coming to save the day at Minas Tirith. Not everything needs to be last second like that. If everything is dramatic then nothing is truly dramatic. In real life, you wouldn't wait until after the point of hope to blow the horn that brings a magic army to fight on your side. You would want to do it as soon as it looks like your own forces aren't going to be enough.

48. Min stayed dressed in all her Seanchan finery to go deliver her message to Egwene. Min's conversation with Egwene is so bizarrely tone-deaf on Min's side of things? She complains about being ~pampered~ by the Seanchan and that their rich food isn't to her taste and when Egwene ~reminds her~ that Egwene has 'enjoyed' Seanchan 'hospitality', Min is basically just "Oops, yeah, my bad, oh well, back to business."

Wow, Min's lack of empathy for the horrific trauma that she witnessed Egwene going through is kinda shocking.

For your consideration, Min in Falme:

When Min asks Egwene not to kill herself out of despair, Egwene tells her that she physically can't. That she can't use anything that she thinks of as a weapon.

She tells Min:

"A few weeks ago I considered hitting Renna over the head with that pitcher, and I could not pour wash water for three days. Once I'd thought of it that way, I not only had to stop thinking about hitting her with it, I had to convince myself I would never, under any circumstances, hit her with it before I could touch it again. She knew what had happened, told me what I had to do, and would not let me wash anywhere except with that pitcher and bowl. You are lucky it happened between your visiting days. Renna made sure I spent those days sweating from the time I woke to the time I fell asleep, exhausted. I am trying to fight them, but they are training me as surely as they’re training Pura.” She clapped a hand to her mouth, moaning through her teeth. “Her name is Ryma. I have to remember her name, not the name they've put on her. She's Ryma, and she's Yellow Ajah, and she has fought them as long and as hard as she could. It is no fault of hers that she hasn't the strength left to fight any longer. I wish I knew who the other sister is that Ryma mentioned. I wish I knew her name. Remember us both, Min. Ryma, of the Yellow Ajah, and Egwene al'Vere. Not Egwene the damane; Egwene al'Vere of Edmond's Field.' "

...

The door swung open, and Renna stepped in.

Egwene jumped to her feet and bowed sharply, as did Min. The tiny room was crowded for bowing, but Seanchan insisted on protocol before comfort.

"Your visiting day, is it?" Renna said. "I had forgotten. Well, there is training to be done even on visiting days."

...

Renna puts on the bracelet and senses that Egwene was channeling without permission:

"You have been channeling." Renna's voice was deceptively mild; there was a spark of anger in her eyes. "You know that is forbidden except when we are complete." Egwene wet her lips. "Perhaps I have been too lenient with you. Perhaps you believe that because you are valuable now, you will be allowed license. I think I made a mistake in letting you keep your old name. I had a kitten name Tuli when I was a child. From now on, your name is Tuli. You will go now, Min. Your visiting day with Tuli is ended."

Min hesitated only long enough for one anguished look at Egwene before leaving.

...

Then, in Min's PoV right after she leaves the room:

Outside in the low-ceilinged hallway, Min dug her nails into her palms at the first piercing cry from the room. She took a step towards the door before she could stop herself, and when she did stop, tears sprang up in her eyes. Light help me, all I can do is make it worse. Egwene, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Feeling worse than useless, she picked up her skirts and ran, and Egwene's screams pursued her. She could not make herself stay, and leaving made her feel a coward. Half blind with weeping, she found herself in the street before she knew it. She had intended to go back to her room, but now she could not do it. She could not stand the thought that Egwene was being hurt while she sat warm and safe under the next roof. Scrubbing the tears from her eyes, she swept her cloak around her shoulders and started down the street. Every time she cleared her eyes, new tears began trickling along her cheeks. She was not accustomed to weeping openly, but then she was not accustomed to feeling so helpless, so useless. She did not know where she was going, only that it had to be as far as she could reach from Egwene's cries.

Compare all that to Min right now: wearing Seanchan silks and whining about how their fanciest food isn't to her liking.

Anyway, she delivers her message from Mat, and Egwene says that she'll take it under consideration.

49. In Ituralde's PoV, we learn about the kinds of nightmares that Graendal has been putting in their heads, and the kinds of thoughts. Three separate times, Ituralde has almost given an order for his men to engage in a direct assault against the Shadowspawn but then been able to pull back again before he gave the Graendal-influenced order, so he's doing better than the other captains. I wonder if his experience in getting all those confusing messages from 'his king' (but actually Graendal) is helping him here. We see him fighting the urge to give one of those bad orders now and he's fighting it extremely hard and then Perrin shows up before he gives in and says it. And Ituralde is so relieved to give up his command because he can tell that something is wonky with his own thinking!

50. Egwene notices that Gawyn doesn't seem tired but he does seem 'strangely pale'. :-(

Thinking about Mat makes Egwene feel "strangely sick". That is such the mood when talking about post-WH Mat, yeah. We are twinsies in this feeling, Egwene. But after thinking it through and remembering the times when Mat has come through when needed, she decides that she is going to trust him, though it makes her feel like she's a fool for doing it. "Mat could be wrong. He was often wrong. But when he was right, he saved lives." and "[Mat] was a scoundrel and a fool but she trusted him. Light help her, but she did. She trusted him with her life."

Not sure Mat deserves that right now, tbh, but it's a sweet thought from Egwene.

And maybe he does.

I'm thinking about 'a ribbon that felt like a chain'. Thinking about Mat considering his father's advice for dealing with cheats during a trade. Thinking about Mat telling Min to pick and choose between her viewings to attempt to guide Tuon onto a better path. Thinking about Mat putting on a Two Rivers coat during the Last Battle.

Maybe he does.

I guess we'll see.

The ultimate factor, once Egwene realizes that Bryne was Compelled, is that she knows that Mat cannot be touched by saidar or saidin, so he is the only general they can trust not to be corrupted by the Forsaken.

#wot #wheel of time #wot reread #wot book spoilers #wot spoilers #wot amol spoilers #wot a memory of light spoilers #mat cauthon #egwene al'vere #min farshaw #seanchan content warning

[freesia-writes]

Howzer + Aurelia Ch. 19 - Rescue

Even as a cocky young shiny, there were a few people who saw the integrity and depth beneath Howzer's facade. Aurelia was one of them, but life tore them apart. However, when they found themselves reunited on Ryloth, with drastically different circumstances, they have to learn anew how to navigate a changing world and their undeniable feelings for one another.

Master List of Chapters

Content/Trigger Warnings for Entire Work (individual chapter posts not labeled): wartime peril, injury, and death (chapters 12-14); pregnancy, birthing trauma, and infant loss (chapters 31-38); sexual assault up to kissing (chapter 19); relationship passion up to making out and heavy petting; sexual relationship alluded to but not described (no smut, sorry) ;)

Word Count: 2.3k

19. Rescue

"Remember that time you tried to impress me by getting caught in the rafters of a Coruscant opera house?" Howzer said suddenly, as they were walking across the capitol square after a morning visit to the refinery. He had a bit of a twinkle in his eye, though his jab was so understated that it sounded more like a factual question than an attempt at a dig.

"Okay, it seemed like a good idea at the time," Aurelia cajoled, surprised by the sudden memory. "What, just feeling the need to rub my face in it again?"

He smiled, shaking his head, "No, actually. I wondered if you'd be interested in seeing a little place I've found here that I thought you might like."

She couldn't see his expression behind his helmet, but she felt flattered that he was thinking of her at all. Unable to resist a grin, she nodded as they walked toward her office building. "I'd love to. Where and when?" she asked.

"I'll swing by here when you get off work tonight?" Howzer suggested, as they drew to a halt at the double transparisteel doors to the offices.

"Perfect. Nothing like humiliation to finish the day off," she joked, beaming at him. He gave a little bow of the head, and they parted ways.

The afternoon was spent on tedious entries on her datapad. She wanted the time to go as quickly as possible, so naturally, it felt like it crawled at a painstaking pace. In an attempt to pass the time more quickly, she decided to go for a walk, use the refresher, and change into a more comfortable (and slightly more flattering) outfit in preparation for the evening. It was getting close to the end of her work day, and she couldn't deny the rising eagerness within. But upon her return, Aurelia entered her office to find none other than Moss Gowden, reclining in the chair opposite her desk with a small array of local foods spread across it. The smells were delicious, but his presence somewhat negated the delight.

"Excellent timing, my sweet," he said, brandishing an arm across the desk in a proud display. "I hope you're hungry! I know it's getting late, but we need to go over the final inventory numbers and make sure the import schedule is all lined up. So I figured dinner would make it more bearable. I hope you didn't have plans tonight."

"Oh, umm. Thanks," she said with a small, forced smile, taking her seat opposite him. She did still have some time left on the clock, but not enough for all that work, so she needed to figure out how to get out of this as quickly as possible. He took a large bite of something crunchy, a fried little roll stuffed with some meat and herbs, and she dug in, deciding the food was worth the miserable company. They ate with periodic conversation for a while, and she had finished her bowl of noodles when she reached across for the platter of vegetables. The movement made her head spin a little bit, which seemed odd. She furrowed her brow, leaning back in her chair and rubbing her forehead with her hands.

"Everything alright?" Moss asked, pausing with his fork halfway to his mouth.

"Yeah, I just got dizzy for a second," she answered, returning to lean over her desk. But despite her best efforts to ignore it until it passed, it only grew worse as they finished their meal. She blinked a few times, hard, realizing that her eyes were slightly unfocused as well. But for some reason, it didn't seem to bother her so much anymore. In fact, it was kind of funny.

"Shall we get to those reports?" came Gowden's voice, sounding almost as if they were in a tunnel. Aurelia giggled at the funny tone, and he tilted his head in affectionate confusion.

"Ah, forget the reports," she said, waving an arm in the air. "I think it's time for a nap!" she laughed, leaning back in her chair so far that she almost tipped over backward.

"What has gotten into you?" Gowden asked, laughing a little bit himself. He stood and walked over to take a knee next to her chair, placing a hand on her thigh... "You feeling a little silly tonight?"

"I guess so!" She looked down at him, realizing in that moment just how much his face reminded her of a fat little blurrg baby, and she giggled uncontrollably, pushing his shoulder with a hand and leaning forward. He mirrored her laughter, gently moving his hand up and down her thigh, and rose to his feet.

"Well, maybe the reports can wait til tomorrow," Moss said slowly, extending a hand to her. "I guess it's about time for you to be done anyway. Why don't we just have a little fun instead?"

She took his hand, rising to her feet, and the world rolled around her as though she were in the middle of the Akkadese Maelstrom. She stumbled to the side, laughing despite herself, and he caught her with a gropey sort of side-hug.

"Oh goodness, you're a mess," Gowden chuckled with a wide grin on his face. "Bet you're glad we had this couch put in your office now, eh?" He led her over to it, easing her down and sitting next to her. She felt a sense of alarm, but it was buried deep beneath layers of murky thoughts that bubbled effervescently in her brain. The couch was so soft, and she sunk into it gratefully, sprawling out in a most unladylike fashion.

But Gowden seemed to find it endearing, and he leaned in, tracing one hand up the back of her neck and the other on her thigh. She moved her leg away, but he followed. The warning bells were still ringing, but she felt as though her head were made entirely of clouds and she was on a little speeder bike flying through them without a care in the world.

"Can I help you feel better?" Moss asked, bringing his face close to hers.

"I'm just gonna sleep now if that's okay and do the reports in the morning and you can call me when you come in to work and we can work on them together cause it'll be good to do the work during the day cause now it's time to sleep," Aurelia murmured, head rolling from one side to the other. It was an odd feeling to be simultaneously heavy and fluffy.

"Oh, that doesn't sound like any fun. I have a better idea," Moss responded, using his hand on the back of her neck to bring her head to his, reaching his other hand to grab her by the waist. He brought his lips to hers, smushing them together with greedy lust, pushing his hand further behind her back and pulling her toward him. She attempted to protest, but it was no more than a mumble as he firmly pressed her neck, keeping her face close, and began exploring her mouth with his tongue.

Why can panic and elation feel so similar? Racing heart, adrenaline flooding, thoughts spiraling into chaos and silence at once... Aurelia pushed on his chest with her hands, straining against him, but he persisted, releasing her face to bring his mouth to her neck instead. She opened her mouth to yell, but he clapped a hand over it and only a little squeal escaped.

Just then, her office door slid open and the clone captain entered, taking in the scene through his visor. As Gowden leaned back to look at who it was, Howzer was already in action, taking three quick strides to the couch, picking the disgusting little man up by his shirt, and throwing him against the wall next to the door. Finding the sudden weight she was pushing against to no longer be there, Aurelia fell forward onto the couch, faceplanting in relief and giggly deliriousness.

"What the kriff do you think you're doing?!" Gowden yelled, scrambling to get to his feet. But Howzer was upon him, delivering a swift kick between his legs that produced a gratifying grunt of pain. He bent down, grabbing Gowden by the shoulders, and lifted him up, slamming him into the wall with just enough restraint to avoid knocking him out.

"I'll have you executed!" Gowden screamed again, greasy hair a wild mess, and a slightly spice-induced glaze over his eyes.

"You won't speak a word of this," Howzer growled, his helmeted voice impressively commanding, "And you will never touch nor speak to her again, do you understand me?"

"You have no--" Moss began, but was cut off as Howzer rammed him into the wall again to drive home the point.

"Do you understand me?" The voice was chillingly harsh now.

"Yes!" Moss yelped, and Howzer dropped him to the floor with another thud. "Crazy clone..." Gowden muttered. Howzer took a swing with all his force, straight to the side of Gowden's head, and he passed out cold in a crumpled pile.

Aurelia's face was sideways on the couch, having watched the whole ordeal with heavy-lidded eyes that were glassy and unfocused. She felt as though she were watching an old action holo, and she smiled and gave a little cheer as Howzer turned to her from the unresponsive figure against the wall. He pulled his helmet off, kneeling next to her and placing a gentle hand on her back.

"Are you okay? What did he do to you?" Howzer asked insistently. His eyes were large, eyebrows peaked in the center with evident concern.

"I dunno!" Aurelia slurred, bringing one arm up in a little half-shrug. "I'm just a silly little stargazer tonight!" She got suddenly serious, "But that was scary! Thank you! Not fun at all!"

Howzer furrowed his brow, lip curling in indignation. He had seen people on spice before, and this seemed to line up. Medical attention would create more problems than it would solve, and it was most easily dealt with by the simple remedies of rest and time. He rose to his feet, pulling his helmet back on, and dug through her bag until he found her key card.

"Can I pick you up?" he asked, returning to her. "I'm going to take you home so you can sleep it off."

"I don't know, big boy, can you?" she laughed, pushing herself into a messily seated position.

Without any hint of mirth, Howzer scooped her up. She wrapped her arms around his neck, leaning her head against his chest plate, legs dangling past his elbow. Her sense of gravity seemed to be cutting in and out, and his firm grasp was the only constant in her tumultuous experience of reality.

"Whoo!" she said quietly, as he exited her office and headed for the lift.

The walk to her flat felt like a split second. The next thing she knew, the quick beep of the accepted key card reached her ears and the door to her home slid open. The familiar smell was so potent and welcoming, she took a deep, happy breath, nestling a little further into Howzer's neck and shoulder.

"Well this is just the best," she said blissfully, closing her eyes. "I mean, earlier I felt gross. But this is just what the doctor ordered." She giggled again, kicking her feet a little.

"I think he put spice in your food," Howzer said, heading for her bedroom. "You'll feel better in the morning, although you'll probably need a lot of water and a good breakfast." He gently lowered her onto her bed, pushing the covers back with his first free hand and easing her head toward the pillow. She nestled into it with a smile, eyes still closed, and he pulled the fluffy comforter over her legs.

"Wait!" she said, sitting up suddenly with such urgent clarity that it startled him. He took a step back, pulling his helmet off now that his hands were free, and set it on the dresser. She looked around the room quickly, eyes finding him after a moment. "Wait... Listen, you. I've wanted to ravage you against the wall since you teased me to at the opera house. And the way you threw Gowden up against it got me all hot and bothered cause I want that to be me. Er, I want it to be you. And no armor this time, I mean it," she rambled, pointing a finger at him with theatrical accusation.

Now he couldn't resist a smile, he and felt a little flicker in his chest at her intense yet inebriated stare. "Is that so?" he asked, maintaining a safe distance.

"Yes," she mumbled, flopping back onto her pillow and closing her eyes again. "You're the most beautiful clone there ever was."

Howzer laughed, thoroughly enjoying her spice-induced honesty. "Maybe I used to be," he began.

"No! You are! The haircut issss... sssexy!" she slurred, "And I'm gonna kiss every one of those scars on your face."

He felt a sense of desire rising from a deep place within, a stirring that was new and yet felt familiar at the same time. Running a hand through his hair, he took a step closer to give her a polite pat on the shoulder. "Well, I'll look forward to that, but for now you should get some rest."

"Stay?" Aurelia asked, opening her eyes to look at him earnestly. "I'll make it worth your while."

"I'm sure you would," he answered, "But not like this." He started forward, finding the sudden desire to place a kiss on her forehead, but stopped, considering it too risky to bring himself that close to her in the apparently voracious state she was in.

"Goodnight, Aurelia," he said, grabbing his helmet and heading for the door. "Tomorrow will be fun."

Feel free to tag a friend who loves Howzer or comment to be added to the tag list! <3

@mary-on-the-contrary @doublesunsets @523rdrebel

#the bad batch #star wars fanfiction #tbb howzer #captain howzer #howzer #the bad batch howzer #howzer fanfic #howzer fanfiction #howzer x oc #star wars romance #clone wars romance #bad batch romance

[the-present-is-a-gift-au]

Chapter 31: In Which Kip Loses a Race

Twig wasn’t necessarily acting off as Kip ordered a meal to split between them at Spinda’s Cafe. She was still herself. She still laughed the same, over-loud way, she still loved the seasoning on that one grilled berry dish and wanted to figure out how Spinda made such a bland, slightly sweet fruit the star of a savory meal, and she still hated juice and always ordered water instead. But there was something underlying all of that. She laughed loudly, and it seemed like a performance— a way to convince him that she was having a good time. She chit-chatted about that one dish and it seemed like she was trying to distract him from the way her tail nervously twitched against the floor. She ordered water and always took a sip when he asked her a question, like she needed to buy herself precious seconds to think of an answer. 

They finished at Spinda’s and started on the walk home. It wasn’t too long of a distance, but it certainly wasn’t to the market and back, so it was starting to get dark by the time they hit Treasure Town. 

They chatted as they went, and Twig seemed more relaxed as they walked holding each other’s hands. Maybe Kip was judging Twig’s nervousness too harshly. It had been three years since he had last set foot in Treasure Town, and Twig always did have a habit of making things up in her head into bigger sources of stress than they needed to be. He should know— he had the same bad habit of overthinking and catastrophizing. 

They really were a perfect match for each other in that way. They both knew how the other’s brain worked— for the most part, at least— and knew how to talk them down from whatever mountain of worries they had worked up for themself. It was a good fit for them to be friends. It made for a wonderfully self-regulating dynamic. 

“You look more like a swampert than a marshtomp,” Twig said, breaking the silence as they walked. 

“It kind of freaked me out, to be honest. I thought I was sick or something. Our medic said it was an evolution that almost doubled over. Can you believe it? I almost became a swampert in one fell swoop! Imagine how tall I’d be…” He trailed off, elbowing Twig playfully. 

She didn’t elbow him back, instead looking crestfallen all of a sudden. 

“Are you okay? Did I say something weird?”

“You’re fine, Kip, I just… I was thinking about how I barely evolved at all.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I’m more charmander than charmeleon. Sure, I’m a bit beefier and I’ve got less baby fat, but I still have a charmander’s coloring and everything. I talked to Celebi about it, actually, and she said it’s probably the temporal distortion acting up. She’s not sure I’ll ever evolve again, or if I'll fully evolve if I end up getting another evolution by some miracle.”

“Hey—” Kip put an arm around her shoulders. “You know evolution isn’t that big a deal, right? Lots of pokemon only ever evolve once, or not at all. It’s not an important thing around here. Not unless you want to evolve like Ursaring did. And then you have all the trouble of people mixing you up!” He joked halfheartedly. It killed him, seeing Twig so upset. She didn’t react to the humor, and he worried he overstepped, but he wasn’t sure how to cheer her up.

Twig’s brow creased in frustration before she sighed, relaxing. “Yeah. You’re right. I dunno why I’m treating it like getting good grades in school or whatever. Why cry over it? It’s not a problem worth worrying over.”

“Yeah! Though, um… Definitely get checked out by a professional if you evolve again and it’s another half-evolution. You might have some health problems if you do, and as much as I love Celebi, she’s not exactly certified.” 

A small smile twitched at the corners of Twig’s mouth. “You’d think that she would be, after how long she spent bragging about bringing Grovyle back from the brink of death.”

“It’s a little worrisome how proud of that she is.”

“Seriously. I get that she’s saying she’s good at healing people, but I thought that she would be a bit more tactful about it.” 

“You’re one to talk, Miss I beat up multiple Legends and only died once on a technicality, therefore I am the best fighter ever.”

“Wh— that was a joke! I was joking! I was doing a funny bit! And it wasn’t even that concerning!”

“Grovyle looked like he was going to have an aneurysm. I thought that I was going to have an aneurysm.”

“You guys just can’t handle a good laugh. That’s all.” 

“Or maybe you can’t handle us worrying about you, kidder.” 

Twig fell abruptly silent, eyes wide and mouth still opened in whatever rebuttal she was prepared to launch back, but then snapped her jaws closed, silent.

“… Twig? You good?”

She shook herself, and Kip recognized how she tried to disguise the shift in whatever she was thinking about as a shiver. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m just tired. And cold. It’s freezing out here.”

“Oh! Yeah, we’re having a really late frost this year, apparently. Dugtrio said he could feel it in his toe-claws. Which… is weird. I didn’t know he had claws. Or feet.”

“Yeah, that’s a bit… extremely unsettling. But a late frost? Again? It’s been warm for ages, but we’re getting one final little hurrah of a cold snap! We had one a couple years ago, and it was the worst. I was practically holed up inside for the first few weeks of spring.”

“You need to get tested or something. It’s not often that a water-type handles cold better than a fire-type.” 

“It’s not often that a fire-type didn’t grow up as a fire-type, either.” 

Kip slapped his forehead. “Oh. Duh, of course. I know you were once a human, but sometimes it feels like you were always a charmander before we met. I mean, it might as well have been that way, considering that you don’t remember being human much.”

“Uh… yeah. Yeah, you’re right.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yep, just chilly. Come on, let’s pick up the pace and get back to the bluff already!”

“Wh—” He froze, shocked when Twig took off in a sprint. He rushed forward to keep up, struggling to match her speed. “Slow down! I’m not as fast as you!”

“Loser has to make dinner!”

“We just ate, you menace!”

Twig let out a cackle, high and proud in its sound, and Kip held onto the hope he was just making up the way she looked so terrifyingly sorrowful when he mentioned her amnesia.

#the present is a gift au #pmd eos #pmd fanfic #pmd fic #pokemon mystery dungeon #pmd fanfiction #pmd explorers #pmd2 #pmd #pmd sky

[bratshaws]

goodness gracious 58. brb x oc

a/n: i've rewritten this chapter twice, IS THIS GOOD??? I HOPE SO

check out the fic's playlist made by the sweet @wiipes !!

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: Fluff, Rooster being whipped, Beatrice getting things and not knowing how to deal with them and rip her subaru

chapters:

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!!)

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 

@lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2 @emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads 

-

They did spend a good Christmas together, the very first one and Rooster couldn’t be more thankful. They also had a quick look at houses and places they could keep in mind for when they wanted to move out, but just to keep in mind what they liked and what they didn’t. It’d still take a while, especially since they had to wait for their leases to end, but it was very exciting.

Beatrice looked so happy while looking at the options, they both agreed that a house might be better and while Beatrice did live in one, they’d like more space. A part of him, a deeper part that he was still trying to control, said they had to get a house with more rooms because of what the future held. He didn’t mention it out loud however, because he didn’t want to freak Beatrice out by the ‘C’ word being tossed randomly into conversation. 

Thankfully he was on Christmas break until New Years Eve so he’d spend all that time with Beatrice, which she was more than happy to know. He liked being part of her routine, he liked being part of her life. And since the Hard Deck would be closed until the second week of January, they’d have a lot of time together. 

He went to the gym on Monday while Beatrice would take the dress back to Evelyn, even if he told her it was very possible it was a gift his girlfriend was relentless in returning it. The gym itself was fairly empty, most of his friends went back to celebrate the holidays with their families with the exception of Nat, Coyote, Halo…and Jake, but Jake was nowhere to be found and he had a feeling he was with Evelyn. 

He wondered if Bea would like to join him at the gym one day, especially now that she was doing pole dancing, he had no idea if she had issues being in such a place.He had to ask when he got back, because it’d be really fun to have her with him as a morning companion as he did his sets. Bradley took one look at his phone, trying to cover his disappointment seeing that her last message was of her telling him she was on her way to Evelyn and that she ‘loved him!! <3’ followed by several kissy emojis.

He couldn’t help the little smile as he reread the texts, sitting on the bench after taking a breather. However he paused, lifted his head up then licked his lips, “It’s not nice to read people’s texts over their shoulders, Nat.” the woman in question chuckles, straightening herself as she wiped her face with a towel.

“You can’t blame me, you and Bea are just so stupidly cute.” she laughs, pulling out her water bottle to take a long chug before she sits down cross legged next to him. Bradley just rolls his eyes, going back to checking his messages and trying to ignore her, “Oh, come on Bradshaw. You know we are your biggest fans in this relationship.”

“Yeah, we even had a bet going;” Coyote’s voice adds as he pulls his training gloves off his hands, “To see how long it’d take you to finally make a move.”

The young Bradshaw was unimpressed, turning the cellphone in between his hands as he looked at his two friends and their cheeky smiles, “Who won then?  There must’ve been a winner if there was a bet.”

“Oh, I did!” Halo says holding up a hand, face flushed from running on the treadmill, “I told all of them it’d take you less than a month and I was right.” she says as she pulls her hair back into a high bun, joining the others in pestering Rooster. The pilot rolls his eyes again but he’s smiling, he doesn’t have in himself to be mad at this group of people he now considered family.

“I’m touched. Really.” he laughs softly, then places the phone screen down on the top of his thigh, “It’s been really great. She’s really great.” he ignored Nat and Halo’s ‘aww’ before continuing, “But you know I’m not the only one dating right? Bob is too and now so is Jake apparently.”

“Well yes, but you and Bea are just too sweet to not admire.” Halo says with her hands clasped, fluttering her eyelashes, “Like a fairytale romance.”

Considering how he calls her a fairy, he supposed it was to be expected.

“And the way you always look at her or wait for her message is also precious.” Nat adds, pointing to his faced down phone with a smirk, “I know you are itching to check it one more time, just to see if she sent you a message because you are whipped.” and now he couldn’t even deny it because he really was. And Beatrice didn’t even seem to notice how much she moved him, how much power she had in her soft hands and how much of him was wrapped in her little finger. 

Was he complaining about it? No, never. 

He was serious about Beatrice, he wanted them to move in together for god’s sake they were even looking up places for reference, but he was a long term relationship type of guy if he found the one. And Beatrice was the one, without a doubt. “Well,I’m glad we can be entertaining to you.” he says and his hand hovers the phone, only for him to curl his fingers and place it down on the bench when he sees Nat’s knowing look staring at the hand. “Which reminds me, Nat, how are you and Umberto doing? Have you been talking?”

The woman was caught off guard, her smug look melted into shock when he asked her about Beatrice’s Italian cousin, her face turning red as the other two pilots looked her way in confusion, “Wait, what?” Halo asks, “Who’s Umberto?” Bradley gives her a full explanation about who Umberto was, where he was from and what he did, adding he was Beatrice’s Italian cousin who was also in the navy and that he showed up a few months back because of special training at their base.

Nat still looked like she wanted to murder Rooster, but she also knew this was just payback from her own teasing because of Beatrice. She tried explaining there was nothing going on and they were just friends, that was all there was, and yeah she had his number but it was just to ask things about Italy and Navy life, nothing more. Bradley looked like the cat that ate the canary, an expression the female pilot had often whenever she teased Rooster about Beatrice.

Speaking of which, his phone vibrated and he grabbed it with so much speed it almost flew off his hand, turning the screen to see Beatrice’s smiling face as the caller, “Be right back.” he mutters, pushing himself off the bench to go to a private area away from his friends who were now busy questioning Nat about the Italian pilot they just found out about - well, Halo did, Coyote had some idea but he couldn’t know Nat was interested in him!! -

Once distant enough, Rooster accepts the call and brings it to his ear, “Hey gorgeous.” He smiles, looking out the large windows that showed the beach to check the gym’s outside, crossing his free arm under his opposite bicep.

“Hi! I just wanted to call to let you know I’m at Ev’s, I just parked the car.”

“Yeah? How was it, did it give you any trouble?” He knew her car wasn’t the best and these past days she’s been complaining about some weird noises from under the hood and he promised he’d check it out for her as soon as he was able.

“Not really?” there’s the sound of the door opening followed by the sound of plastic as she picks the dress up, “It hasn’t made any sound on the drive here, so…maybe that’s good? How’s the day at the gym though? Did you see anyone?”

“Yeah,Nat,Coyote and Halo,” he tilts his head back to where they were, watching Phoenix gesture wildly while shaking her head with the word ‘no’ being mouthed out to their friends and he couldn’t help his triumphant smirk, “They are fine. We were all on a quick break right now.”

“That’s good!” her voice lowers a bit as she talks to the concierge, thanking the woman once she’s done before her voice comes back, “I’m glad you saw them! Can you send them hi for me?”

“Of course, gorgeous.” he says, listening to the elevator’s doors on the other side slide open and then greet Beatrice in its automatic voice “By the way, what do you want to do when you get back? We’ll have the whole day for ourselves after all.”

“Oh,I don’t know yet, Roos.” he could hear by her tone of voice that she’s smiling, “There’s still a lot of food back at my place so we won’t have to go out to eat, maybe we could take Jojo to the dog park?”

“That sounds good to me.” he hears the ding from the elevator reaching Evelyn’s floor “Sounds like you got there.”

“Yeah…I’ll call you when I go home?”

“Sure baby, I love you. See you in a few hours.”

“I love you too! See you!”

He finishes the call with the same lovey smile on his face, sliding his phone inside his shorts’ pocket and making his way back to where the group of pilots were still discussing what happened between Nat and Umberto, biting his lip to hold back the smile at Phoenix exasperated look, putting on his air pods and going back to his set.

-

Beatrice grins when the call ends, then looks back to where Evelyn’s door appeared, putting her phone inside her back pocket. She’s about to knock it, but the door is already opening before she could, slowly revealing Evelyn’s gigantic penthouse and Wiley, who is sitting sweetly looking up at Beatrice, “Hello, you!’ she coos, crouching to his level to scratch his chin, laughing when the cat leans his head back then lifts his body so she scratches his back as well, “Where’s Evelyn, hm?”

She hears talking coming from somewhere inside her apartment and she thinks she’s with Jake. Would she? Were they already at that level? She watches the door close behind her and lock automatically, fixing the dress in her arms as she wanders deeper inside the apartment, the voices coming from Evelyn’s room were definitely male and female, muffled because of the distance, “Ev?” she calls and the conversation halts for a second.

Evelyn’s head pops out from the edge of her door, to which Beatrice gives her a small wave and holds the dress up “I-I came to give it back.” her friend talks something to the person inside her room before she walks down the hallway to meet Bea, wearing a turtleneck dress and bare feet.

“Bea, what do you mean give it back?” the brunette opens her mouth to explain but Evelyn has her hands on her hips, arching both eyebrows, “It’s yours. You don’t have to give it back to me?”

She knew Rooster suggested it, but that was the last thing in her mind, there’s no way her friend would give her this expensive dress without wanting its return, it was impossible that it was going to happen. And yet, she stood in front of her taller friend with her eyes wide and mouth parted in surprise, watching Evelyn just arch one eyebrow at her, “I…” Beatrice drops her gaze to the dress then back at Evelyn, “I-It’s mine? But–but I–”

“How?” Beatrice nods in silence, making Evelyn smile, “Well, some designers either sell or donate their dresses if they no longer have space in their studios. That’s what happened with your dress and Shells’.” she looks down at the plastic cover, then pats the dress, “So this should be in your armoire, not back in my closet.”

Beatrice only stared at Evelyn, feeling like she needed to sit down, her body leaning backwards until it touched the back of her couch where she supported herself, “I…I…” Beatrice only hugged the dress close to herself, “Thank you, Evelyn.” the black haired woman just smiled, tilting her head in a ‘you are welcome’ way. with her hands still on her hips.

Before they could continue talking, a voice interrupted, “Evelyn! I still need your help!!” the woman in question looked back at her bedroom then towards Beatrice who looked confused.

“I…do you have a friend over?”

“You can say that– “ she clenches her eyes when the voice calls her name again, “I’m coming Marcus! Jesus, calm down! Sorry Bea, I didn’t think he’d still be here when you showed up.” Another figure steps from inside her bedroom, tall and lanky with a zebra printed suit and black pants, huge red rimmed glasses on their face as they make their way over. 

“Evelyn,” the person says, “This is impossible! I cannot find one single model that fits my vision!Oh!” Marcus, Bea assumes, slaps a hand against his forehead and leans back dramatically, “How am I to do this photoshoot without a perfect model???” Evelyn rolls her eyes at his comments, crossing her arms unimpressively. 

Marcus dabs the tips of his fingers below his eyes as if he’s wiping tears, Beatrice notices the tiny diamonds glued on his cheekbones when he does that, pulling out a red handkerchief to add more drama to his whole performance. That is until he opens his eyes and she sees Beatrice, his mouth parting in surprise, “Wait,” he holds a finger, pointing to the brunette, “Who is this?”

Evelyn gently lowers his hand from where it’s pointing at her friend’s face, “A friend of mine, Beatrice.” She notices how Marcus shoves his handkerchief inside his suit and holds both hands up this time, making half a square by joining the tips of his thumbs together. Beatrice only watches it with a worried gaze, sending a question without words towards Evelyn with her eyes but the other woman looks just as confused, “What are you doing Marcus?”

“Oh she’s perfect.” he completely ignores what Evelyn asks, “May I touch your face?”

“I…”

“Marcus, what are you doing?”

The man just ignores Evelyn again, his smile only to Beatrice, “You are perfect. You have the face, the body, the beauty I’ve been looking for!”  After the words leave his mouth, Evelyn finally has another reaction: shock. He’s walking around Beatrice with his hand on his chin, nodding to himself as he takes in what she’s wearing, “Yes, you’d look marvelous in pomegranate–”

“Marcus,Beatrice isn’t a model.” a what? The brunette only watched this conversation with her eyes still wide and face slowly flushing with embarrassment, her mouth still hanging open with surprise, “You wanted a model.” Evelyn wasn’t saying Beatrice wasn’t beautiful, she was, but the taller woman was worried because Beatrice was still very shy and she’d hate to see her getting uncomfortable with something she clearly had never done before.

“No, no, I wanted a vision.” Marcus corrects, holding up one finger. “And I found her.” he sees that the brunette is still confused, so he straightens himself and holds out a hand, “Marcus Beverly, photographer, designer and all time fashion guru.” Beatrice hesitantly shakes his hand, much for the man’s amusement, “You, my dear, are just perfect for a photoshoot I’m planning.”

“...a photoshoot?”

“Yes! Oh yes, you see, my new campaign needs raw beauty, something human. Not,” he makes a face, flapping his hand in the air as if he’s swatting a fly, “The obvious Hollywood body, I want reality and I want beauty. And you have the most beautiful face I’ve ever seen. Look at those cheekbones, that jawline and those lips!”  Beatrice’s cheeks redden even more, eyes dropping to her hands holding the dress to her chest.

“But…I-I’m not a model, or anything like that.”

“Oh darling, no one was born a model.” he scoffs with a grin, ignoring Evelyn’s glare, “You have a natural beauty - oh look at those eyes!- that many people envy.”

Beatrice took in his words with the immediate ‘compliment wall’ coming up. She got used to hearing she’s pretty from her friends, from Rooster and while it still made her a bit uncomfortable she could get why it was being said. Now, when it came from strangers she got…unsure, the goblin voice in her head goes insane whenever that happens. “I…”

“You don’t have to say yes, Bea.” Evelyn cuts off gently, offering her friend a smile before it drops to scowl when she turns to the man in front of them, “Right,Marcus?” the man stops staring at Beatrice to turn to Evelyn, sighing in agreement with a toss of his head.

“Right, right, of course, but…you won’t get out of it empty handed.” he says, like the Fox that lured Pinnochio to Pleasure Island, “You’ll get paid handsomely. I can assure you, I always take good care of my models.”

Beatrice licks her lips, furrowing her eyebrows, “Um…I…I-I’d need to think about that,” she says with a nervous laugh, giving a look to Evelyn that resembles ‘help’ and the other woman immediately walks forward, “But I-I’ll let you know!”

“Oh,sure! Here!” his card is on her hand before she notices it, “I can’t wait to hear from you, darling, the photoshoot will be done February, until then take care!” He disappears back into Evelyn’s room as the two women stare with befuddled faces, Evelyn placing a hand to Beatrice’s back to walk her out of the apartment with Wiley following close by after she slips some shoes on.

She leans down so the orange tabby leaps on her shoulders, where he lies like a fancy pelt as they make their way to the elevator. Neither of them say anything when they enter, still surprised at what just happened, only talking when they are in the lobby with the concierge nodding towards Evelyn as she walks past ehr desk, “Ev…w-what just happened?”

Evelyn opens her mouth, then closes only to open again “I honestly have no idea.” she mutters, walking Beatrice out of the building and back to her car with Wily sliding from her shoulders to land on her already aligned arms as if he was an infant, “He’s…” she thinks about her words, “He’s eccentric, but not a bad guy.”

“How do you know him?”

“I worked with him,” she begins, “As a model and as a designer. I helped with some of his photoshoots when he launched his collection a few months back.” she keeps on scratching Wiley’s head and her eyes remain on Beatrice, “I really had no idea he’d ask you to model for him.”

Beatrice leans her back against the car’s door, running a hand through her brown tresses as she tries to understand what happened. First: she got herself a very expensive dress and didn’t have to return it, then a fashion designer friend of Evelyn’s wanted her to model for him and even gave her his card. All in a matter of minutes. She didn’t know exactly how she should feel because that wasn’t a common thing for her, at all. “I…I just, well, it was a surprise.”

“I know,I’m sorry, you really don’t have to call him back. I can tell him to find someone else.” Evelyn offers her a small smile, one the brunette reciprocates. They chat a little bit more before Beatrice places the dress back inside her car and steps on the driver’s seat, waving Evelyn goodbye and turning the ignition.

Only the car didn’t start.

She blinks at the key, pulls it out then tries again, not a single sound comes out of her fossil on wheels. Evelyn was still outside when this happened, leaning forward to have a better look “What’s happening?”

“...I think my car died.” she mutters, “For real this time.” she tries a few more times but she gets nothing. She knew it would happen, eventually, but she should’ve prepared and now…now she had no car to use anymore. Beatrice sighs heavily, dropping her forehead to the horn and frowning when not even that works anymore, “God damn it.” 

“Do you want me to drive you home?” 

Beatrice looks back at Evelyn and Wiley, who is now staring right at Beatrice just like his owner was before the brunette pulls out her phone from her back pocket to check the time. Hopefully Rooster was done at the gym, “No, I can call Roos…and…figure out what to do with the car I guess?” she laughs out of nervousness at the thought of being without a car for so long. Of course she could sell her Subaru but how much money would she get? It was already old, its value wasn’t that high anymore.

“Alright, I’ll stay with you while you call him, okay?” Beatrice nods, stepping out of the car while rubbing her face, feeling a headache coming already. She was a bit glad it happened after Christmas but she wasn’t glad it happened when she was so far away from home.

“Hey angel, have you got home yet?”

“Um…not really.” she looks back at her car with a frown, “My car died, Roos.”

“Died?”

“Yeah it’s…um…it no longer works so…” she shrugs even if he couldn’t see it, sounding more defeated than she appeared to be, “Can you come pick me up? I’m still at Ev’s.”

She hears him rummaging something on his side, probably his duffel bag “Of course baby, I’m coming right now. I’ll be there in ten minutes okay?”

“Okay…” she couldn’t help but feel sad about the car, it was old but it was hers “I’ll be here.Love you.”

“Love you too, baby.”

Both Evelyn and Beatrice sit on the sidewalk waiting for the blue Bronco to show up, which it does just under ten minutes, parking a bit far from the Subaru as Rooster walks out, already giving the other car a look still wearing his gray top and black and green shorts he used for working out, “No smoke?” he asks Beatrice, who shakes her head with her lower lip jutted out just enough, “Baby, it’s okay. It was its time to go.”

“Yeah,I was telling her the same thing,” Evelyn smiles encouragingly, rubbing Bea’s back. “You wanted to get a new car for a while, didn’t you?” the brunette nods, standing to her feet once Rooster got close enough.

“...I need to call my dad, he knows about cars.” she murmurs, “He probably knows what I can do with it now that its gone.” she sighs, touching the side of the car, then patting the hood fondly. The more she thought about it, the more her head hurt, even rubbing her forehead with a hand when she felt the anxiety and stress already climbing up to immeasurable levels. Rooster frowns, standing close to Beatrice as she rubs her head.

“You okay?” she nods silently, still rubbing her forehead, “Do you want to wait in the truck?”

“No, it’s fine.” Beatrice says with a small smile, “I’ll be fine, it’s nothing.” just the fear and worry of not having a vehicle and fearing if she’d ever get another one. She made enough money on the Hard Deck to pay her bills, her rent and everything else…but getting a new car was something she hadn't thought about. Evelyn then says she’s going back now that Bradley was with her, because Marcus was still in her apartment and was probably trying to figure out how to use the ice machine in her fridge.

She said her goodbyes, then walked back inside her building as Beatrice and Rooster stood in front of the Subaru in silence. She just leaned her temple against his chest, sighing heavily yet again then hugging his middle, “I sent my dad a message, he’s coming over.”

“Okay.” he tilts his head to have a better look at her face, hugging her to himself, “Are you sure you are okay, angel? Hey, look at me.” he cups her chin to tilt her head up, tsking at her sad eyes and lower lip still jutted out, “Pretty girl, it’s okay. It’s not your fault that this happened.”

“I knew it was giving me issues, Roos and I still used it.” she murmurs, pressing her face in between his pectorals with a groan, “I should’ve just asked you to bring me over, I’m so dumb.”

“Woah, okay,” he pulls her head back, cupping her chin one more time, “Unless you have future vision, pretty girl I don’t think how you would’ve known. Don’t blame yourself Bea, we’ll work something out, okay?” 

Beatrice just frowns but nods still hugging him, “Okay, Roos.”

#bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x oc #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw x reader

[o-kaythislooksbad]

@ailesswhumptober day 31: PTSD / headaches / crying

[draft/snippet from the next chapter of retrace the steps and pick up the pieces, where steven's eventful morning continues]

an exasperated recording tells steven that he's reached larry, and really, there's no need to leave a message, since he probably won't call you back, and steven bites down on his tongue to keep from yelling. his eyes are too warm for his face, and they keep twitching, distracting him with little bursts of pain. steven's hands shake as he takes marc's phone out of his pocket, because larry needs to get back here before the girl vanishes again.

now do you understand why it helps to have separate things?

steven fumbles with marc's phone, blanking out as marc guides his fingers to enter the password. it's an odd sensation, being present and distant at the same time, and it causes the aches to spread to his forehead and the back of his neck.

can you please tell me that i'm not the only one who is terrified that this child can teleport, because mate, that's wild.

marc doesn't respond, and larry doesn't pick up when he calls from marc's phone, either, which is fair, he only texted me last night. but what are we meant to do now? there's a protocol for missing children at the museum, right, but nothing about what to do when one blinks in and out of existence.

eddie. call eddie; his number should be in my phone.

"right, right, okay. calling eddie. how do you know him, by th- " steven's question is cut off by eddie answering his phone.

"marc?"

"it's, erm, i'm actually steven. but you might know me as marc?" steven's not quite sure if they had this conversation or not before kay disappeared.

"steven, yeah. not marc. yeah, okay, got it." agitation is clear in eddie's voice, and the sounds of traffic in the background cause bright sirens and muffled gunfire to flash in steven's mind. "listen, unless you got eyes on the kid, i'm sorry, i really don't have time to chat."

"she's here, mate. at the diner with us, with me and bruce. i tried calling larry but he wasn't answering, so marc had me call you."

"larry!" steven can hear eddie shout, "she's back at the diner!" eddie lowers his voice and says, "thanks, guys. we'll be there as soon as we can." he hangs up, leaving steven to say 'bye' to no one.

nice to be appreciated.

"thank you, marc," steven sighs, placing the phone on the table. he looks across the booth to make sure the girl is still there. 

kay sits with her back pressed against the wall, and her legs drawn up to her chest. tears are drying on her cheeks, the poor girl, as she holds on to a stuffed bear for dear life. steven turns his attention to bruce, because he's figured out enough about kay to know that being alone with them must be hell.

bruce doesn't look much like bruce, nor much better than kay, and i probably look even worse. he looks so lost and small as he cries silently, his eyes alternating between darting around the diner, flashing in different shades of green behind his glasses, and staring blankly at the opposite wall. he toys with a set of rings when he looks around, but when his eyes still, his entire body is a statue.

a shiver runs down steven's spine. is this ... is this what it looks like, being completely on the inside, without anyone near the outside? he looks absolutely terrified.

with everyone relatively calm and eerily quiet, there's nothing left for steven to focus on except for his headache. keeping his eyes open and his head up takes an incredible amount of strength, and drains the energy from the rest of his body.

there's a lightheadedness, despite the invisible weight of bricks in steven's skull. the room and its inhabitants start to blur as his heart beats too fast for the rest of his body, and suddenly he's not in a diner in california but a dining room in chicago, and a hand grabs him sharply by the ankle, dragging him down the stairs.

#word stuff #ailesswhumptober2023 #fanfic #steven grant #marc spector #kay challis #the little guy / unnamed child

[shes-homeward-bound]

Crash and Burn | Chapter 1

Summary: You’re the first female driver to compete in the Formula 1 World Championship in decades and it's your second year of navigating through a male-dominated sport. Your talent and drive to prove yourself made you vicious on the grid. Your seemingly unshakeable confidence was never questioned- until a certain Ferrari driver made you crash and burn.

Pairing: Carlos Sainz Jr. x Reader

Chapters: 1/11

Warnings: swearing

Word Count: 2.3k

Posted on: 3/31/2022

masterlist

A/N: hey guys! This is my first fanfic so feel free to give me feedback! I’m not posting this story anywhere else so please lmk if you see my writing on other sites. Pls remember this is just fanfic. This is just for fun and what I write is not an actual depiction of their character. Also, I have nothing against Lance Stroll, I just really wanted the reader to be teammates with Sebbie. Enjoy!

Chapter 1:

The sound of cars honking in the distance drew your attention away from your phone. Your performance coach Anna tapped the steering wheel in annoyance. There was a traffic jam on the freeway and you were already running late to the last testing day in the Barcelona circuit.

“Great,” you murmured. 

“Try to relax. Use this extra time to loosen up the neck and shoulders. Don’t forget your neck stiffens up when you get too anxious” said Anna

Despite it being the third day you were still tense and the last thing you needed was to feel more nervous. Attempting to calm yourself down, you scrolled through the pictures of your rookie year as you slowly rolled your neck. You couldn’t help but smile at a video of your first podium in Spain. P3. You could hear the laughter as you sprayed the champagne directly at Lewis only to get ambushed by Max as he targeted the both of you. The next picture was you smiling brightly dressed in Aston Martin green clutching your champagne bottle and trophy.  This was your first and only podium but for a rookie, that was an amazing achievement. But, you were hungry for more. You were always wanting more.

You were determined to get Aston Martin out of the midfield and with the legendary Sebastian Vettel as your teammate, you knew you’d have a great shot for a fight to the top. Last year’s season was great and with this year's new sponsors, you have a chance to compete with the big teams. 

Being the first female Formula driver since Giovanna Amati in 1992, it turned heads and rocked the Formula 1 world. The misogyny and sexist comments about you would most likely never stop but you proved to them what you were capable of. Your podium as a rookie and regularly scoring points in 16 out of 22 Grand Prix earned respect from the paddock and F1’s commentators. You were lucky to have started racing in 2021, you couldn’t imagine what the female drivers went through 40 years ago. You still had a lot of work to do regarding female representation in motorsport and you were up for the challenge. 

After what felt like forever, you and Anna finally arrived at the Circuit de Barcelona-Catalunya. You smiled and waved at the photographers at the entrance awaiting your arrival. You walked briskly and quickly changed into your fireproof suit and immediately got to work.  After making your rounds greeting the engineers, and mechanics, you hopped in the car and tried to zone out everything else. It was just you, the car, and your race engineer. 

As practice dwindled down and multiple laps were made around the circuit, your body was sore. You pushed the car to the limits trying to get used to the new 2022 model whilst giving feedback to the engineers. Sebastian’s pace was better than yours but you didn’t let that bother you. The important thing you needed to worry about was to get used to the car and learn how to best handle it. You were constantly fighting the car in all the turns and the oversteer wasn’t helping. It also didn’t help that your heart jumped whenever a Ferrari passed you. 

Testing was officially over and the drivers and their teams dispersed. You spotted the shorter man with the papaya-colored mask and you squealed. 

“LAANDOOO!” you said as you ran towards him.

He met you halfway greeting you with a bear hug. “You were late! You missed breakfast with the boys!” said Lando.

Lando had become one of your closest friends in the paddock. Being the same age as him helped you bond as he helped you transition from F2 to F1. Before you could answer Lando, you were engulfed in another hug from the honey badger himself.

“Mini-Me!” he hollered as he squeezed you tight.

“Ugh! You smell like socks Daniel!”

“You don’t smell the best either!” he said as he wrestled you into a chokehold.

After winning over the media in your debut season, people started comparing your personality to Daniel Ricciardo. You were always smiling and socializing but had aggression when it was needed. The fans loved whenever you guys would interact with each other. You fed off each other's energy and you could guarantee something funny was bound to happen when you two were together. 

Catching up with the other drivers felt so surreal, you couldn’t help but get starstruck as you chatted with drivers like Lewis and Fernando. You thought the shock would wear off after your rookie year but here you were beaming at them. Sometimes when you receive texts from your teammate Sebastian, you’d have to collect yourself before replying. 

You spotted a flash of red in your peripheral and you whipped around to see who it was. The Monegasque grinned at you under his mask and fist-bumped you. Just like Lando, befriending Charles was easy due to the closeness of your age. You spent a load of your time streaming and playing on the F1 simulator with Lando, Charles, George, and Alex. 

“How’d practice go today?” said Charles.

You stretched your back feeling the muscles strain. “I know we train off-season but getting used to the G’s is always a challenge.”

“You better get used to it, Aston Martin was looking fast all weekend”

You rolled your eyes. “You literally overtook me 3 times.”

Your laughter died down as you noticed the other Ferrari driver approaching the group that surrounded you. You didn’t know what it was but you didn’t know how to act around Carlos. Even though you thought he was one of the most handsome men you’ve ever met or that you thought he was one of the best drivers on the grid. You’ve never had a genuine conversation with the man. All of your interactions have been brief and polite but you couldn’t tell if he liked you or not. Hell, you couldn’t even tell if he’s accepted you in the grid as a female driver. You’ve tried to get more out of the man but it was almost like he avoided you. You didn’t have to be friends with everyone on the grid but it was nice to know they had your back.

Carlos willingly approaching you was new and you guessed he probably hadn't even seen you. Your suspicions were confirmed as you noticed his eyes widen when he spotted you. He gave you a curt nod and that was it, his attention was now fully on Lando. The boys started loudly conversing and it left you quietly observing the Spaniard in red. He didn’t even properly greet you and it bothered you more than it should. You watched him energetically interact with the other drivers and you wanted to know why he couldn’t even have a proper conversation with you. 

Maybe it was the competitiveness in you or the constant need for validation but you were determined to break down that weird wall he’s put between you. During the team debrief you started your annual goal list for the season. 

Become one with the car

Score the points in every Grand Prix

Befriend Carlos Sainz Jr. 

Out of the three, you could already tell which one would be the most difficult to achieve. 

*******

After spending time in the factory, you decided to have one last mini-vacation before the Bahrain practice sessions. It was the first week of March so you knew it wouldn’t be too warm but Mallorca and the Mediterranean Sea were calling you. It wasn't peak holiday season and that was the way you wanted it. You rented a beautiful beach house for a week and you’ve been appreciating the peace and quiet. In a few days, it would be the start of long hours and cameras constantly shoved in front of your face. Even though you’ve had great media presence, it still made you anxious. Everything you did or posted was scrutinized by fans and F1 commentators. They were waiting for you to make mistakes, act aggressive or be too emotional. The constant questions about your love life annoyed you the most, your male colleagues were rarely asked that question but it was a regular occurrence for you. 

Your love life was never really exciting and that was probably for the best. When you fall for someone, you fall hard. You were emotional and you tended to put a lot of energy into your relationships. You had a boyfriend during your stint at F2 but before your rookie year, you broke it off, putting 100% of your focus on your career. 

It was your last day at the beach house and you decided to let your coach sleep in. Your favorite cafe was only 3 miles away and you had the great idea to do your morning run and get coffee afterward. It was a long 3 miles but you pushed yourself hard and by the time you arrived you were gasping for air. As you got control of your breathing, you admired a vintage Ferrari that was parked by the cafe. Well, that’s typical for Mallorca you thought.

You were appreciating the decor and the exciting atmosphere when you noticed the man standing in line in front of you. Wearing workout clothes and a backward cap was someone familiar. You discreetly shifted to the left to get a closer look and a gasp escaped your lips. 

“Carlos?!”

His head snapped in your direction. His jaw dropped in surprise as he looked you up and down making sure it was the Aston Martin driver in front of him. Then something uncharacteristic happened. He smiled at you.

“Y/N! What are you doing here?”

“I’m just trying to have one last holiday before the season officially starts. You?”

“Same, I came here to spend time with my family before the chaos started," said Carlos.

You both stood in awkward silence not sure what to talk about next. You were about to blurt out something stupid about the weather when Carlos broke the silence.

"Do you want to join me for breakfast?" he said as he gestured to a table nearby.   

"Sure," you stammered. Your head was spinning. He went from not talking to you to inviting you to eat with him.

With a latte in hand, you and Carlos settled down by one of the window seats. You both sat in comfortable silence taking in the view of the coast.

"How are you feeling about the upcoming season Carlos?" 

He sipped on his coffee as he thought about his answer. "Ehh… I'm excited of course and I have a lot of confidence in the team. I was feeling good in the car in Barcelona but I don’t want to jinx myself. Only time will tell."

You laughed.  

“You sound like you’re getting interviewed right now.”

“But it is true!” said Carlos. 

You never realized how prominent his accent was. Despite traveling the world and spending time with many nationalities, you liked that it hasn’t changed. He asked you how you were feeling about your second year in Formula 1 and you responded with honest fervor. 

“I want those podiums, Carlos. I keep thinking about my podium in Spain last year and I want more. I don’t expect to win this year but I want those podiums.”

Carlos laughed. “You’re more competitive than I thought. That’s good though, you need that drive to compete at this level. But, you already know that.”

You quirked your head to the side. You didn’t want to push it but you knew this was a good time to call him out. 

“Well…you would know if you tried to talk to me,” you said softly.

Carlos froze in his seat before he ran a hand through his hair as you watched his face turn red. He was at a loss for words as he desperately racked his brain to find the words in English. You definitely caught him off-guard and you were beginning to regret what you said.

“You’re right. I realize I haven’t exactly welcomed you with open arms and I'm sorry about that,” said Carlos. He extended his hand towards you, his voice sincere. “Let’s start over?”

Looking at his hand and then his face, you decided he was genuine. You took his hand and firmly shook it. He apologized but he didn’t offer you any explanation for his behavior. It wasn’t enough but you didn’t want to push it, this was progress.

“Agreed. Let’s start over.”

Despite the awkward conversation, you two pushed through and had a pleasant breakfast. You started talking about your rookie year in F1 and he was able to relate to the craziness you’ve experienced. As the both of you shared stories of your karting days, you were able to relax and think about the shift in your and Carlos’ relationship. The man in front of you was different from the one you see in the paddock. He was actually being friendly and willingly holding a conversation with you. Maybe you misjudged him or he misjudged you. 

The more you observed him you felt a small twinge in your gut. You could feel your heartbeat slightly accelerate as you took in the details of the man sitting in front of you. You shifted in your seat and fiddled with the utensils in front of you. You were mentally pushing down that feeling, you knew what that little pang could turn into. You were just realizing why you were so bothered about his behavior towards you. You were a little too attracted to Carlos Sainz Jr. and you were finally letting yourself admit it. You took a deep breath and slowly sipped on your coffee. “Fuck” you thought. This is going to be an interesting season.

#carlos sainz jr #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz fluff #carlos sainz jr x reader #formula 1 fanfiction #formula one x reader #formula 1 x reader #f1 fandom #f1 fanfic #formula 1 fanfic #charles leclerc #lando norris #daniel ricciardo

[moon-light-jukebox]

“All you have to do is ask” Chapter 5 - [Reid x Reader]

previous chapter // series index // next chapter 

Summary: The team has a case that takes them to Illinois. Our favorite boy wonder gets jealous and challenges Reader. So, she decides to show him who is really in charge.

Pairing: Spencer Reid / (Female Reader)

Word Count: 5.7k for Chapter 5

Content Warning: Here we go. The team has a case, so talk about m*rder, the usual criminal minds stuff. Jealousy. BDSM. Femdom. Degradation. Slapping. Spitting. Face sitting. Face fucking. Vaginal fingering. And I think that’s it.

A/n: In celebration of my 1 week of writing again, and all the lovely support I’ve gotten, I’m giving you chapter 5 a day early. Chapter 6 is still scheduled for Saturday. (Mostly because I haven’t written it all yet.) Chapter 5 is my favorite so far. I hope you love it as much as I do...because things only escalate in chapter 6. 😇 Some names on my tag list still aren’t working. I’m sorry! 

y/n = your name. y/l/n = your last name. italicized text are Reader’s thoughts.

-- Chapter 5: “Are you jealous, Doctor?” –

I don’t resent my job, I repeated mentally for the thousandth time. I don’t resent my job. I am not upset. I am happy to be here to help people in need. I didn't even sound very convincing in my own mind. I had known it was too good to be true. I finally had Dr. Reid right where I wanted him…when both of our phones chimed with the same text message. "Avengers, ASSEMBLE.” But it’s fine that we’re sitting on the jet at 10 pm headed to the Midwest. Keep telling yourself that, y/n. Serial killers were such cock blocks.

The ding from the computer on the small table signaled Garcia's digital arrival. "Hello, my loves!" Her sunshine personality would not be dampened by our sleepy grumbles. Or sexually frustrated grumbles, in my case; and from the way Dr. Reid kept sneaking glances at me, I suspected his too.

“What do we know so far?” Hotch asked, cutting right to business. If he was tired, he certainly didn't show it. I'm still not even sure if he's human.  

“The Illinois state police say that our 5th victim is named Sarah Gossman. She was a 32-year-old middle school teacher. Reported missing by her husband, Ralph, two days ago. Locals didn’t realize she was connected to the other victims until her body was found 2 hours ago.”

Hotch nodded, scanning the open file in front of him. “How were they able to connect them, Penelope?” David Rossi, the grandfather of the BAU questioned.

Garcia cringed. “They found the same wound on her shoulder blade. A square of her skin was missing.”

“It’s an interesting signature,” Spencer interjected. “The edges look jagged. Almost like the blade was serrated.”

“That’s what the M.E.’s thought too.”

“Babygirl, do they know if it’s the same knife that was used in the other murders?”

For a moment all that was heard was the clicking of her keys. “That is the suspicion, my beautiful chocolate sculpture of perfection.” I snorted at that one; every once in a while, their flirting quips got me. “They need the knife to be sure.”

"Thanks, Garcia," Hotch said before ending the video call. “Alright, if this unsub holds to pattern, he is going to take his next victim before 10 am tomorrow morning.”

“We might not be able to stop it,” Prentiss said. “But we can get her back. He keeps them for at least 36 hours.”

Hotch nodded. “Get some sleep if you can; it’s gonna be a long night.”

--

I jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder; my fear evaporating when I turned and saw it was just JJ. “Hey,” she said softly. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” I said with a yawn that I couldn’t muffle. “I just feel like I’m stuck in a swamp, you know?” She nodded. “How he’s choosing them will be how we find him. How we find her.”

True to pattern, the unsub took his next victim the following morning after the body of Sarah Gossman was found. Alicia Sheldon, 31, was reported missing by her mother just after 10 am this morning. We had no proof that she was with our unsub outside of the profile, but we all knew that the clock was ticking if we wanted to bring her home alive.  

JJ nodded, reading over my shoulder. “Narrowing down when can help too. Any luck?”

“Not really,” I sighed, closing my eyes. “I don’t think he does it at night, though. Garcia was able to see the activity for Alicia’s phone before she was taken. She replied to a text message at 4:45 am this morning.”

“Jesus Christ, that’s early.”

“What’s early?” Emily Prentiss asked as she walked into the conference room, Derek following after her.

“4:45 am is early,” I supplied. “Alicia replied to a text at that time.”

"Do we know if it was her?" That voice came from someone I hadn't laid eyes on yet. He must have followed Derek and Prentiss in. Dr. Reid was staring at me intently, his shirt wrinkled, glassed perched on the bridge of his nose. Even like this, he was so pretty it almost hurt to look at him. “Could the unsub have answered the text message to throw off suspicion?”

“I don’t think so, Doc.” I pointed at the evidence board where her most recent text messages and emails had been printed and tacked up. “Her text seemed personal. Not too much detail. It was sent to her best friend; unless the unsub was stalking her, there isn’t a way he would know that.”

Spencer nodded, walking around the table until he came to rest in front of the board. “Why would she be up so early…” His posture stiffened. What do you have, baby? What do you see? He turned and hit the phone that was in the center of the table.

“Speak and be heard.”

“Garcia, can we determine what time the last digital activity any of the women had was? We need to determine if they were all taken in the early morning hours.”

Morgan commented, “What are you thinking, Kid?”

Spencer didn’t answer, Garica spoke first. “Victim one and three are a no go; but victims 2 and 4 both had some digital dealings before 5 am the days they were reported missing, but they were all still at home according to the GPS on their phones.”

"Again, I say, Jesus, that's early."

I nodded at JJ. “Right. Who wakes up that early?”

“Someone with a strict routine,” Spencer said, his eyes never straying from the paper in front of him. “Garcia, did all of the victims have gym memberships?”

“Yeah, but to different gyms.”

Reid looked like he had just won the lottery. “What if all the women were on their way to the gym when he grabbed them? They all look athletic but have hectic schedules; it might be the only time they can fit it in. It’s still dark, but it’s technically morning. The women might feel safer. We didn't connect it right away because victims 2, 3, and 4 lived alone, no one knew their routines. He lies in wait and then grabs them, stuffing them into their own cars and driving off.” He was speaking rapidly at this point. “That could be why no one has found their cars yet. He has them.”

“Oh shit,” I muttered. “We need to see if the gyms have outside cameras.”

“Already on it, crimefighters.”

--

The unsub had left his car in parking lots adjacent to the gyms where the women were abducted for almost 2 days each time.

He thought he was smart; Spencer Reid was smarter.

“Hey,” a voice called from behind me. I turned to come face to face with a local deputy. He was a bit taller than me, stocky build, blonde hair that was cropped close to his scalp. “Good work out there today, Agent.”

“Thanks. You too, Deputy.” I turned, continuing to pack up my files. I was ready to go to the hotel and get some fucking sleep. Our jet was set to head out at 8 am the following morning. I’d gotten some sleep Saturday night; the team had gone back to the hotel in shifts while we continued searching for the unsub. But now it was Sunday afternoon and the exhaustion was starting to wear on me.

He cleared his throat, wanting my full attention again. “I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go for a drink?” Oh no.

I smiled at him, trying to be polite. “Oh, thanks for the offer but I’m really tired and we fly out early tomorrow.”

Deputy Douche didn’t like that one bit. He stepped forward, placing a hand on my upper arm. “Well, it doesn’t have to be a drink,” his smirk made my lips want to curl up in a snarl. “I can meet you back at your hotel and we can break in that bed together.”

Oh gross. I jerked my arm out of his grip. “No, thanks.” I turned my back to him.

He looked miffed but had the sense to not make a grab for me again. I felt his fingers brush over the end of my hair as he leaned in. “Let me know if you change your mind,” he whispered. He slid a piece of paper on the desk before he turned and finally left me alone.

Gross. I threw the paper in the trash.

My attention was so focused on finishing up so I could escape before Deputy Douche came back that I didn’t notice Spencer watching me from across the precinct with a deep frown on his pretty face.

--

I was unbuttoning my shirt when I heard a firm knock on my hotel room door. “Come the fuck on,” I whined. Leaving the two buttons undone I went to the door, expecting to see Hotch, given how sharp that knock was. It wasn’t Hotch. It was my boy looking angrier than I’d ever seen him.

He shoved through the doorway, making his way into my room. Luckily, we all had separate rooms this time. “Well, come on in,” I muttered before I shut the door.

Spencer was fuming. “What the fuck was that?”

I blinked. “What the fuck was what?”

His hands balled into fists at his side. “At the police station. With that Deputy.”

Maybe it was how tired I was, but none of this was clicking. “Deputy Douche? You saw that?”

“Yeah, I fucking saw that,” he scoffed. “I saw him touching you. Flirting with you.”

“Right.” Right?

Wrong, apparently, because that did nothing to dampen his anger. “Why did you let him touch you?”

It clicked then, right at that exact moment I saw what was beneath his anger.  “Spencer…are you jealous?" I knew it wasn't the best idea to laugh but I really couldn't help it. The idea was so ludicrous to me. Morgan didn't call Spencer 'Pretty Boy' for no reason. On top of being one of the most brilliant people in the world, he was also the most gorgeous person I had ever seen. His bone structure alone was enough to make most women do a double-take. The thought that I would choose to spend my evening with the Deputy…over Dr. Spencer Reid? Yeah, no.

His cheeks burned pink, but he held his ground. “You said we were monogamous.”

Oh, hold up. I barked out a laugh. “No,” I corrected. “I said we could talk about monogamy in our dynamic if you wanted to continue." I felt my anger rise so quickly. "You have a fucking eidetic memory, baby. You know what I said.” Plus, I can’t control who flirts with me, dickbag, I thought, choosing not to say it out loud.

His anger matched mine. “I thought it was understood!”

“Nothing is understood until we talk about it, Doc.”

“Don’t call me that, not right now.”

Bad move, baby. “Oh, so you think you give the orders, Doc?” I made sure to put a lot of emphasis on the last letter in an attempt to rile him up further.

It worked because no sooner had the words left my mouth than his body slammed into mine. His mouth sealed over my lips in an angry kiss, his tongue demanding entry to my mouth, his hands tangled in my hair, holding me to him.

I was so lost for a moment; I hadn’t felt this in so long. For years my relationships were in perfect control, nothing unexpected. Who knew Dr. Reid would be the one that broke that pattern?

I hope you’re ready for this. My right hand grabbed the hair at the back of his head, tugging hard. His mouth broke away from mine with a yelp, but my left hand came up to hold his face, forcing his lips to pucker. “What do you think you’re doing?”

He looked scared for just a moment. Come on, baby. You can do it. Enlightenment washed over his face as he whimpered out, “I’m sorry.”

I tugged his hair again, only this time he moaned softly at the sensation. “You’re sorry what?”

“I-I’m sorry, Miss.” He licked his lips, looking more unsure than scared now.

Despite how fast my heart was beating, and how blown his pupils were, I couldn’t move forward until he understood. Spencer needed to understand the rules of a situation to feel comfortable. “We don’t have to do this, baby,” my voice was a whisper; somehow my serious tone didn’t manage to break the tension that hung around us.

“I want to,” his voice was hushed, urgent. “I trust you, y/n. And I feel so…I don’t know what this feeling is.”

I rubbed my thumb over his cheek, brushing over his bottom lip. “I know, sweet boy. I’ve got you.” I pressed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. “Green, yellow, and red,” I said knowing he’d understand what I meant. “There’s no shame here, pretty boy. I will not be upset with you if you need to use a safe word. It doesn’t mean our relationship ends, just this scene.” He nodded quickly. “I need your words, baby.”

“Yes Miss,” his voice was breathy, but his eyes were steady.

I smirked at him. “Good boy.” My hand tightened in his hair. “You’ll be a good boy for me, won’t you Dr. Reid?”

“Y-yes Miss.” I had guessed that the honorific would be a turn on for him, and judging by the whimper that followed his words, it looks like I was right.

“Take your clothes off and lay down in the center of the bed,” I released him, backing away to put as much space between us as I could. “Wait for me. You’re not allowed to touch yourself.” Honey brown eyes met mine, he wasn’t confused anymore. All that I saw reflecting in those eyes was desire.

I walked around him, never turning to look at him, and I headed into the bathroom. I finished taking off my shirt. I ran a brush through my hair. I did any tiny little task I could think of; I wanted him to wait.

The thing about BDSM dynamics that most people don’t understand is that no relationship is the same. The punishments that made one submissive tremble wouldn’t be effective on another. Anticipation would make Spencer squirm; I was sure of it. I had given Dr. Reid a lot of thought since our first conversation. I needed to understand what desires drove him if I was going to be able to bring him to the heights I wanted to.

Looking in the mirror, I puffed out a big breath. Truth be told, part of me being in the bathroom was to build anticipation for Spencer…but, part of it was because I was afraid. Even before tonight I had decided that my nervous boy deserved more than I gave the average sub. I cared about all my submissives to a point but, Dr. Spencer Reid was different. Maybe it’s because he had already held my life in his hands for almost a year; that made it easier…hell, it made it possible to trust him with this.

Squaring my shoulders, I turned and walked out of the bathroom. The main room was lit only by a lamp on the bedside table, covering our little world in a soft glow. I stalked slowly towards the bed, my eyes dragging up, up, up, until I saw him. He had followed my directions; I realized this was the first time I had ever seen him completely naked. He was beautiful, so beautiful. He wasn’t as scrawny as he looked to be with his clothes on. His body was covered in lean, toned muscles. He had no hair on his chest, giving him a slightly delicate appearance in my eyes; I wanted to mark that chest with scratches from my nails and bruises from my mouth. His cock laid against his thigh, half hard already. Like the good boy, I knew him to be, his arms were at his side, hands balled into tight fists.

I reached for the button of my pants, undoing them slowly, my eyes never left Spencer’s. Once my pants were off, leaving me in just my bra and panties, I placed a knee on the bed. I was careful not to touch him while I crawled up the bed to kneel beside him. Spencer's eyes bounced all over my body, his hands clenched and relaxing. My boy didn’t know what was to come and waiting for it was agonizing.

I reached out my hand to him, allowing my fingers to barely brush his arm. I trailed them up then down again and again. “Tell me why you came here tonight,” his eyes searched my face, still looking so vulnerable. “Why did you come to my door, Spencer?”

He licked his lips. “I-I was mad.”

My touch became firmer, a sort of reward for his honesty. I let my fingers wander up to his collarbone, over his chest. "Why were you mad, Dr. Reid?"

The whimper that slipped from his lips when I called him Dr. Reid was music to my ears. His hips were shifting on the bed, he was fully hard now.

“Because he touched you.”

I moved to swing my leg over his body, straddling his abdomen, careful not to touch his cock, not yet. “And why were you mad that he touched me?” I whispered.

“He can’t touch you,” his voice was breathy but firm. “You’re mine.”

Slap.

He looked startled when my open palm connected with his cheek. It wasn’t as hard as I wanted; I was still unsure. “No, Dr. Reid. I’m not yours. You are mine.” I leaned over him, my arms going to either side of his head to cage him in. “Do you understand?”

In the way that Spencer knew everything, he knew what I was really asking. His voice was no more than a whisper. “Green.”

I offered him a small smile. Then I lifted my hand to grab on to his face again. “I asked you if you understand, Dr. Reid?”

Spencer nodded quickly. “Yes Miss, I understand.”

I released his face before moving off the bed again. “You’ve been a very naughty boy, Spencer.” I gave him a frown as my hands reached behind my back to undo my bra, letting it slide down my arms. Spencer licked his lips, his fists becoming tighter. “I’m very disappointed in you, baby.”

“I-I’m sorry, Miss.” His voice was dry as he stumbled over his words.

"Are you, Dr. Reid?" I asked as my thumbs hooked into the waistband of my panties. "Are you really sorry?" Wiggling them down my hips, I let them drop to the floor before I stepped out of them.

“Yes. Yes, Miss. I’m so sorry.”

I crawled onto the bed, sitting back with my legs underneath me, letting my hands run up and down the skin of my thigh. “They’re pretty words, Dr. Reid, but I don’t know if I believe you.” I tilted my head to the side, bringing both my hands to my stomach, inching them up to my breasts. I let out a moan when I finally reach my destination, massaging my breasts, twisting my nipples while Spencer watched. I heard him whimper, causing a smile to tug at my lips. You’re doing so well, baby. I raised my body up so I was on my knees; I spread my thighs slightly, letting one of my hands drop to the apex of my thighs. Spencer watched so closely I’m not sure he even blinked when I dipped one finger inside the place that ached for him. I moved my finger in and out, biting my lip while I watched him.

After a moment I removed my finger, surprising him by bringing it to his mouth. “Open.” He obeyed instantly, his cheeks hollowing out as he sucked on my finger. “I wonder what else I could make you suck on.” I withdrew my finger from his mouth, bringing it back to my pussy. “How are you going to prove that you’re sorry, Dr. Reid? What are you going to do for me?”

His voice was filled with longing and hunger. “Anything, miss, I’ll do anything.”

I smirked, moving closer to him. Bracing my hands on either side of his body, I swung my leg over his torso, keeping on my knees so I didn’t touch him. Not yet. “Anything, huh?” He nodded quickly; his eyes fixed on my pussy.

I moved one hand to the headboard, the other moved to touch those beautiful curls of his, pulling hard enough to get another moan from him. “If you really want to apologize, Dr. Reid, maybe you can put that pretty little mouth of yours to better use?” I applied a tiny bit of pressure to his head.

He looked confused for a second, his eyes were wide in surprise like he couldn't believe what I was asking him to do. He probably can’t, I thought.

“What’s the matter, baby?” I teased. “Do you not want me to put my pussy on your face? You don’t want me to fuck your tongue?”

“No, no!” He whispered hurriedly. “I want that more than anything Miss.”

“Good boy.” I think he felt the significance of this moment too. “I’ll forgive you if you can make me cum before I get bored of you," I smirked down at him. “What do you think about that Dr. Reid? Can you make me cum all over your pretty little face?”

“Yes, Miss.”

“Open your mouth.” I leaned over, putting my mouth closer to his, making it clear what I was going to do before I spit into his mouth. “Swallow it.” He swallowed obediently without any hesitation. Noted.

“Okay, Dr. Reid. I’ll take that apology now.”

He moved so fast. His hands hooked on the backs of my thighs, pulling me up his body while also pushing himself down the bed. My pussy was hovering over his mouth, he licked his lips, his fingers flexing on my thighs. He looked so desperate for me…but still so unsure. “Go ahead, baby,” I whisper, pulling on his hair hard enough to make him whimper.

With that, he gripped my hips and pulled me to his mouth. I felt his tongue move through my folds, gathering the wetness that pooled there. He moaned so loudly, pulling my hips down further, bringing my pussy closer to his face.

It had been so long since I’d felt this. I hadn’t let anyone touch me like this in years; it was so much better than I remembered, but that may have just been because it was Spencer doing it.

“Ugh,” I moan, starting to rock my hips. “Fuck, baby.” I pulled his hair, tugging hard enough that I knew it hurt. “I’m already getting bored, Dr. Reid, and you just started. You can do better than that.”

I wasn’t ready, not even a bit, for his lips locking around my clit. He flicked it with his tongue, then circled it, trying to find the method that made me groan and grind my pussy down on his mouth.

“That’s more like it, Dr. Reid,” I said, earning another moan from him. “I knew there had to be a better use for this smart mouth." My hips started rocking faster, his fingers were digging into my flesh. "What would the team say if they knew about what a dirty boy you are, Dr. Reid?" His tongue sped up, causing me to shudder. I bit my lip so hard I felt real pain. I didn’t want him to hear me moan; he hadn’t earned it yet. “What would they say if they heard Dr. Reid beg me to fuck his face? You’re always such a good boy, baby. But you’re not the good boy they think you are. You’re my good boy.”

My hips were moving more rapidly; Spencer hadn’t slowed his pace at all, almost like he could feel how close I was. What I had planned would be hard for me…but I knew it would be torture for him. After a few moments, when I felt my pussy spasm with the telltale signs of my impending orgasm, I gripped his hands and pulled them from me while I lifted my hips.

His mouth was red, wet, and his lips were swollen. His face morphed from one of bliss to one of confusion. “Wha-“

I moved away from him. “That was really the best you could do, Dr. Reid?” He bit into his lip, he looked almost embarrassed as his eyes moving down to my pussy.

“Please, Miss,” he begged. “Please let me finish. You taste so good. You were so close, I felt it.”

I chuckled, “Oh you felt it, huh?” I reached between my thighs, gathering some of my wetness, then moved that same hand to grip Spencer’s cock. At that first touch he let out a strangled sound that was almost a scream; my poor boy is so sensitive. I gave him a few pumps before I removed my hand.

“Miss, please.”

“You didn’t make me cum, Dr. Reid,” I said sweetly. “What makes you think you’ve earned my touch?” I moved my fingers back to my clit, rubbing slow circles, still so, so close. “Touch yourself.” He obeyed immediately, his eyes never leaving my fingers that were swirling around the place his mouth had just been. “I want you to touch yourself like you do when you’re at home in bed, Dr. Reid. Back when you still felt so guilty, but you just couldn’t help it…because I know you thought about me when you touched yourself long before Nebraska.”

His eyes shot up to meet mine; it was hard to tell if his flushed face got a little pinker in the dim light of the room. “You don’t need to deny it, baby.” My fingers started working faster. “I know. I’ve always known. So, I want you to touch yourself like you did back then. You can do that for me, right baby?”

Hand moving faster and faster now, he gave me another beautiful whimper, “yes Miss.”

“Good boy,” my finger’s slowed. “I said you could touch yourself. I never said you could cum. Stop, Spencer.” I could tell from his breathing that he was so close to the edge. “I said stop.” I reached out to grip his arm tightly, digging my nails into his skin.

Once he had released his cock, I took in his appearance. His stomach muscles kept tensing, his cock was leaking precum steadily now, his dick was an angry red, his teeth were digging into his bottom lip, and I could see the tears of frustration swimming in his eyes.

“Aw, baby,” I cooed, leaning over to put my body above his again; I caressed his cheek softly. “What’s wrong?”

"I-I" the chatterbox that was Dr. Spencer Reid was finally speechless.

I lifted my hand off of his face only to bring it back down in a sharp slap. “I asked you a question, Dr. Reid.”

I saw the desperation in his eyes. I know baby, I know. We’re almost there.

“Please, miss,” his words were so quiet. “I can’t take this anymore. I’m sorry. I’m yours.”

He deserved the world. This wonderful man deserved the entire world. “I believe you, Dr. Reid.” I leaned over him then, sealing my lips over his, my tongue stroking into his mouth softly. I felt his hands rise up towards my body only to stop just before they made contact.

He made my heart swell. I pulled my mouth away, looking down at him with an emotion I didn’t want to name shining from my eyes. “You’ve been such a good boy, baby.” I pushed the damp curls off of his forehead. “Such a good boy. I think you deserve something special.” I rose up on my knees, straddling his body again, my hand moving down to my pussy to spread myself open for his eyes. “What would you like more? Do you want me to put my pussy on your pretty face again? I’ll let you cum while you make me cum. I know how badly you need to taste me, Dr. Reid.” I bit my lip at how quickly he nodded his head. “Or, I can let you fuck my mouth. Hold onto my hair and fuck your pretty cock down my throat. Then I’ll let you watch me cum after.” I left a kiss on the tip of his nose.

Dr. Spencer Reid usually made decisions quickly; his mind worked so much quicker than everyone else, but he was struggling here. His eyes met mine, he looked so desperate and lost in a sea of his own desire.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you, baby.” I moved down his body then, trailing kisses down his stomach. I gripped his cock hard in my hand, causing him to moan so loudly I’m sure someone in the neighboring rooms heard him. “Fuck my face, Dr. Reid. I want to watch you come undone.”

Needing no further encouragement, his hands tangled in my hair, tugging the strands so hard it made my eyes water. I opened my mouth over him; he lifted his hips going far deeper into my mouth than he would have done normally. I relaxed my jaw, swallowing around the head of his cock. My eyes were watering too much to watch him, but I heard him.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he chanted, pulling my head down to meet his upward thrust. “You feel so fucking good, y/n. I’m gonna…” he let out a ragged breath. “I’m gonna cum.”

No sooner had the words left his mouth than he came apart. His groan was from deep in his chest and it sounded like my name as he filled my mouth. He slowed his thrusts, but I continued sucking. I needed him to feel every ounce of this.

When his hands finally dropped from my head, I released him. I wiped my eyes and I took him in. He looked so overwhelmed, shattered, and beautiful. I moved up the bed, lying beside him and wrapping him in my arms. I peppered his shoulder with kisses. “You did so good, Spencer,” I praised. “So, so good. I’m so proud of you.”

Spencer turned, his hands cupping my jaw while he stared so deep in my eyes. What I saw swirling on the surface of those amber eyes made my heart stop.

“You didn’t cum.” His voice was scratchy.

“I know. It’s okay,” I reassured. “We can take a break. Or you can watch me cum now.” I kept stroking his hair, his body. “Whatever you want, Spencer.”

My core was still throbbing, the sight of his release only pulling me closer to the edge.

His lips lifted in a smirk. “Whatever I want?” he teased.

“Yes.”

He blinked once, then again. He didn’t know quite what to do with my confirmation; but I meant it, in this moment, I was willing to give Spencer Reid anything and everything.

“…Can I make you cum?” he searched my eyes for any sign of hesitation. “I…I want to finish. What I was doing earlier.”

My laugh bubbled out of me. “I just had your cock down my throat but now you can’t ask me if you can make me cum on your face?”

I was still laughing when he leaned forward to kiss me; both of his hand cupping my jaw. There was heat behind this kiss; it brought my simmering arousal back to a giant flame in my lower belly. Heat wasn’t all that was there though. I can’t think about that. I couldn’t dwell on what I felt, but I felt it with my entire soul.

Despite what we had just done, this felt different. The scene felt over, his powerful orgasm had shifted the mood in our little bubble. I wasn’t his Miss. He wasn’t my pretty, nervous boy. He was Spencer and I was y/n; and he wanted to make me feel good. He rose over me then, wasting no time on foreplay; he knew I didn’t need it.

He settled between my thighs, his hands wrapping around them, his fingers digging into my skin. With one final look at my face to make sure this was really okay, he put his mouth on me. My back arched and my mouth hung open in a silent scream. Spencer didn’t toy with me; he knew how close I was.

“Spencer, Spencer, fuck,” his eyes opened when my fingers tangled in his hair, my pussy grinding into his face. “I’m so close. Fuck.”

I was so lost I didn’t realize his hand had moved until I felt two fingers enter me, curling expertly. He pumped his fingers and wrapped his lips around my clit, sucking firmly. That was all it took for me to cum for him.

It all happened so quickly I didn’t have time to be scared. He was the first man to make me orgasm in longer than I wanted to admit. I knew the last time I let someone put their mouth on me. It had always felt like a deeply intimate act to me, I was always nervous to let anyone do it.

Spencer rose up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Why is that sexy?

He laid down beside me; I'm not sure who's arms wrapped around who first, but we were clinging to each other, both of us breathing hard.

“So,” I said, after clearing my throat. “What did you think?”

Spencer chuckled, the hot air of his breath puffing against my hair. “I liked it.”

“Yeah?” I pulled back to look at his eyes.

“Mhm," was his response as he leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss on my lips before his mood shifted. "Y/n…I'm sorry I got so mad." He looked so embarrassed as he said it as if it wasn't the sweetest thing in the world that Spencer Reid would care about me like that. “I just…I saw him touching you and I just…” he dropped his gaze. “I know we didn��t talk about monogamy, but I thought- I was just so worrie-“

My finger pressed against his lips. “I don’t want to be with anyone else, Spencer.”

We fell asleep shortly after that. I couldn’t help but wonder if his thoughts felt anything like mine; the irony of it all was I was too afraid to ask.

Series tag list: @abschaffer2​ @liaabsurd​ @brokenanxiety​ @thisiscalmandits-dr​​ @less-intelligent-spencerreid​​ @reidsmyhusband-emilysmymistress @cielo1984​ @sarcasticsagittarius1998​ @101donuts​ @heyitssarahk @creepingfromthecorners​ @imjusthereformggcontent​ @fanfictionislifetho​  @annestine​

Taglist: @rachelxwayne​ @pinkdiamond1016​ @sickeninglyshoujo @justagirllookingforherplace​ @nanocoool​

#criminal minds #criminal minds fan fiction #criminal minds fan fic #Spencer reid #dr. Spencer Reid #Spencer Reid imagine #Spencer Reid x reader #Spencer Reid x you #Spencer Reid x y/n #Spencer Reid smut #reid smut #dr Spencer Reid smut #dr reid smut #criminal minds smut

[baoshan-sanren]

Chapter 48 & Chapter 49

Emperor Wei WuXian And His Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Birthday

Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 Part 1 | Chapter 8 Part 2 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 Part 1 | Chapter 15 Part 2 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 | Chapter 22 Part 1 | Chapter 22 Part 2 | Chapter 23 | Chapter 24 | Chapter 25 | Chapter 26 | Chapter 27 | Chapter 28 | Chapter 29 | Chapter 30 | Chapter 31 | Chapter 32 | Chapter 33 | Chapter 34 | Chapter 35 | Chapter 36 | Chapter 37 | Chapter 38 | Chapter 39 | Chapter 40 | Chapter 41 | Chapter 42 | Chapter 43 | Chapter 44 | Chapter 45 | Chapter 46 | Chapter 47

The Imperial guard who approaches him is very careful, almost reverent in his posture.

Lan XiChen is resting. He has been ordered to do so by uncle, who has done precious little resting himself, only stepping away from the guqin when his fingers are on the verge of bleeding.

Since Wei WuXian had been moved from the grand hall, not a moment has gone by without the sounds of Cleansing weaving throughout the Emperor’s chambers, a continuous exertion of spiritual energy that no single Lan cultivator could have maintained. But there are three of them, and although their skills and abilities differ, the Emperor is no longer in danger, his chest rising and falling smoothly with unlabored breaths of deep sleep.

WangJi has only abandoned the guqin when ordered to do so, and only so he may move closer to bed, settling down on the floor by Wei WuXian’s shoulder. The position does not look restful; WangJi’s tense figure is stiff with coiled worry, his eyes locked on the Emperor’s face, as if by sight alone he can infuse more color into his cheeks. XiChen can hear the soft murmur of Lady Jiang’s voice, and WangJi’s equally as soft response. Some steps away, the Rogue Prince stands motionless, his vigil silent.

“Young Master Lan,” the Imperial guard whispers, “forgive me for interrupting. General Nie is outside, requesting to speak with you. What would you like me to tell him?”

XiChen needs a few moments to formulate an appropriate response.

The Imperial guard waits patiently, deferentially even, comically folded in half so he can hear XiChen’s response. XiChen finds this entire situation beyond absurd.

The Young Master of the Lan Sect should not be asked if he wishes to speak to the General of the Emperor’s army. The Young Master of the Lan Sect can be issued an order by the lowest court official, and would have no choice but to obey. Yet, he thinks, if he were to tell this Imperial guard that the General must wait, or come back at a later time, the guard would jump to follow instruction.

The rest are no better. For hours now, they have tiptoed carefully around all three of the Lan Sect members, as if charged with protecting royalty. Most of them even hesitate to look at uncle directly, their eyes never quite managing to rise past uncle’s knees. Uncle’s performance during the Gifting Ceremony had been impressive to be sure, but the current level of veneration for a man who had been dismissed and spurned only a day ago, seems far beyond excessive.

XiChen had not spoken to Nie MingJue since issuing the misguided invitation. This is neither the time nor the occasion for the conversation they must have, not to mention that XiChen feels ill-prepared to have it even under the best of circumstances. But now, in the midst of their attempts to keep the Emperor breathing, in the midst of his brother’s obvious anguish, his uncle’s exhaustion, his own fatigue, XiChen cannot face the prospect of further heartache.

Still, he cannot have the guards turn the General of the Emperor’s army away, regardless of their willingness to do just that. He rises slowly, and the guard steps back, as if XiChen would scold him for standing too close.

Nie MingJue waits just outside the entrance, facing two dozen Imperial guards. He is wearing full armor, his hand resting on the pommel of his saber.

The General of the Emperor’s army looks as if he may need to fight his way past the Imperial guards in order to enter the Emperor’s chambers. This implies a great deal about the powers currently in charge, and most of these implications are alarming in nature.

Is the Emperor still the Emperor? 

XiChen does not know. No one else has come or gone. No inquiries have reached them, no orders, no edicts. There could be a bloody war outside the Jade Sword Palace, and none of those in the Imperial chambers would ever notice it being waged.

All these are legitimate concerns and worries, but XiChen cannot find the words to voice them. In the Nie battle armor, both chest and shoulder plate depicting the sneering Beast’s Head sigil, Nie MingJue is terrifying to behold. But the moment his eyes land on XiChen, his posture shifts, his face softens, the change clearly visible and devastating to see.

The hand on his forearm is careful as it draws him some distance away from the guards.

“XiChen,” MingJue says, “Are you well?”

It is a struggle to find his voice, but XiChen manages, “The Emperor is recovering well. It may be some hours yet until he wakes, and it will take many days for his strength to return. Uncle says he had fought back, attempting to expel the resentful energy on his own. This had saved his life, but it has also significantly depleted his--“

The hand tightens on his forearm, cutting his words in half.

“XiChen,” MingJue says again, “I asked if you are well.”

It is a basic rule of politeness, that the question once blatantly ignored, should not be repeated. But such rules have no effect on Nie MingJue.

XiChen is tired of suppressing the constant and unrelenting waves of anxiety. The calluses he had built up over the years cannot hold up to the punishing pace they had set to keep the Emperor breathing. His fingers hurt. His shoulders hurt. He has suffered greater discomforts in the past, and borne them with dignity. But now, he feels very small, and very tired, and he wishes that he could say these things to Nie MingJue, perhaps the only person who would not think less of him for hearing them.

He exhales, a shuddering breath that feels much too revealing, “I am well. I am only tired. Why are you here? Is the Emperor still in danger?”

Nie MingJue glances back at the Imperial guards and pulls XiChen a little further away, out of their hearing range.

“The Jiang Sect has taken charge of the Imperial guards,” he says, “Which was to be expected. The Jiang and the Nie have always stood together as brothers-in-arms in the defense of the Emperor. But there are... tensions. Multiple sects are calling for a war with the Wen. The High Councilor appears to be in agreement. Perhaps he sees such an action as a logical response to the attack on the Emperor. Or perhaps, he is resentful of the fact that HuaiSang is in possession of an edict naming him the guardian of the successor.”

The carefully concealed anxiety blooms in XiChen’s chest, leaving him breathless.

“Can the Council declare war? Without the Emperor’s approval?”

“No,” MingJue says, “but they may try and do so regardless. If I refuse to follow their orders, this will result in different war, right here in the palace halls. I do not want to lead the army against the Imperial guards. This must be prevented.”

“How-- what do you need? What can I do?”

“I need the Emperor,” Nie MingJue says bluntly, “The sects need to hear that the Emperor is well, and recovering quickly. They need to hear this from the Lan Sect Leader.”

They are far enough away where XiChen can no longer hear the sounds of the guqin, but he knows that the Cleansing has gone on uninterrupted.

He shakes his head, “My uncle-- the Emperor is not yet well enough to be left to the care of WangJi and myself. I will come in his place.”

Chapter 49

Nie HuaiSang has never sat on the dais alone.

He has wielded almost as much power as the Emperor himself. He has frequently sprawled on the Emperor’s seat, worn the Emperor’s clothes, used the Emperor’s seal. But he has never before felt so utterly alone.

His personal guard, the members of the Nie Sect charged with his protection, are lined up behind him. The High Councilor is to his left; to the right, the empty space where A-Jue should be is a constant source of anxiety and irritation. In front of him, the receiving hall is crowded with every Sect and clan leader in the Immortal Mountain City, only some of them trustworthy, and nearly all of them unpredictable. The seat underneath him feels akin to a death trap, waiting for an opportune moment to snap closed on his tender backside.

His hand tightens around the fan, then relaxes. Tightens, then relaxes.

With Wei Ying by his side, he could hide behind the fan. He could do anything, say anything, act in any way he pleases. With Wei Ying by his side, the obvious clusters of hostility in the hall would be an insignificant source of amusement.

His eyes meet Jiang Cheng’s, only for a moment, neither acknowledging the contact. In the back of the hall, three members of the Wen Sect stand under guard. Wen Qing is cool and collected, her head held high, her robes bright and striking next to the muted Nie greens. HuaiSang can see A-Lin making a conscious effort to emulate his sister, but being a nervous creature by nature, he is only managing to appear more rigid. Granny Wen is in possession of composure that HuaiSang very much envies at this moment. Their lives are on the line as much as his own, but one would never know it by looking at Granny Wen’s face.

The rest of the Wen Sect is in the Jade Sword Palace courtyard, under guard, and awaiting their fate. HuaiSang has managed to stall the calls for an immediate attack on QiShan, but only by insisting that the Emperor’s condition must take precedence. Still, with each moment that passes with A-Jue conspicuously absent, the tension in the hall seems to rise, the hostility and the resentment thickening.

HuaiSang would very much like to keep all of the secrets that must be kept, and not start a war today. He has an unpleasant feeling that he may not get to have both.

It is difficult to conceal a sigh of relief when A-Jue finally enters the hall. The Lan Sect Leader is absent, but Lan XiChen’s placid countenance is almost an improvement. It is no secret that Lan QiRen is generally disliked for his personality alone, the man’s icy facade only serving to agitate the existing resentment. Lan XiChen, infinitely serene in the face of animosity, patient and humble to a fault, may be precisely the type of calm presence that can soothe the waves of unrest in the hall.

There may be some question as to whose authority is higher in this instance. The Royal Companion, often perceived as the Imperial Consort, technically does not outrank the High Councilor. His status as the guardian of the successor only gives him power once the Emperor is no longer among the living. Still, Lan XiChen does not hesitate. His first bow and greeting is given to Nie HuaiSang. He turns to the High Councilor next, a perfect mirror image, the bow no less deep, the greeting no less courteous. But the hierarchy the Lan Sect recognizes has been made clear. This acknowledgment is significant, considering the current position of the Lan Sect, both as the saviors of the Emperor, and their future connection to the throne through marriage.

Nie HuaiSang greets Lan XiChen politely in turn, feeling as if his seat is now a little less likely to collapse under his anxious bottom.  

“Young Master Lan,” the High Councilor says, “the Council requires an update on the Emperor’s condition.”

“The Emperor is recovering well. His life is no longer in danger.”

The hall had hushed to hear the response, but now a low murmur rises, the word traveling among those placed furthest away from the dais.

“Are you quite certain?”

“I am certain,” Lan XiChen says, his voice unwavering, “The Emperor should wake soon, although he may still require days of rest to regain the spiritual energy he had lost.”

All of HuaiSang’s bones seem to turn liquid at once. It is by force of will alone that he manages to stay upright, instead of slumping against the throne in relief.

“The Royal Companion had summoned the Lan Sect Leader,” Jin GuangShan says carefully, only two steps below the High Councilor, “Is there a reason that the Young Master is here in his place?”

Lan XiChen smiles, but the smile does not reach his eyes, “The Jin Sect Leader is very observant. The Lan Sect is honored to be an object of the Jin Sect Leader’s concern. My uncle believes that the Emperor’s recovery must take precedence over other matters. Please forgive my humble presence in his place.”

Nie HuaiSang feels that he has been quite unjust to the Young Master of the Lan Sect in the past. He also believes that he could become quite fond of the man in the future. It has been somewhat... difficult to reconcile himself to A-Jue’s single-minded focus on Lan XiChen, a person who is still essentially a stranger. It is a common failing of siblings, to find their future in-laws unworthy despite all evidence to the contrary. But Nie HuaiSang is willing to admit his error.

“The Emperor’s health, of course, takes precedence,” the High Councilor says, “We are grateful to the Lan Sect for their assistance and dedication. As the Emperor is recovering swiftly, I believe all decisions may wait for his judgment.”

A louder murmur rises at his words, and Nie HuaiSang braces for the inevitable. 

Which comes, to no one’s surprise, in the form of Sect Leader Yao.

“Are we to simply allow the Wen Sect to go free? After such a betrayal? The Emperor himself had stated that their lives are to be forfeit if Wen RuoHan ever dared orchestrate another attack. Do you mean to act against the Emperor’s orders?”

This, of course, is all Wei Ying’s fault. Nie HuaiSang had offered to have Sect Leader Yao killed years ago. The man would have been infinitely more useful as dust and bones, than he is now, with his flapping mouth always sowing discord. 

“The Wen Sect will be placed in the dungeons to await the Emperor’s judgment,” Nie HuaiSang says coldly, “Only the Emperor may decide the means of executing traitors. These decisions have never been within the purview of the powers given to the Council.”

“The Royal Companion is correct,” Jin GuangShan’s voice raises the hair on the back of HuaiSang’s neck, “and yet, my own disciple was jailed by no other than the former First Prince’s servant. The Jin Sect has yet to receive an explanation for this action.”

“Your disciple was jailed by my orders,” A-Jue says dismissively, “and will wait for the Emperor’s judgment along with the Wen Sect.”

HuaiSang winces. He loves his brother, but diplomacy is not Nie MingJue’s strong suit.

“Sect Leader Jin,” HuaiSang says meekly, “Your disciple had displayed suspicious behavior in the wake of the attack on the Emperor. Perhaps he is innocent, but surely, you do not begrudge us an overabundance of caution. I can guarantee that your disciple will come to no harm until the Emperor himself has had a chance to address the matter.”

He knows that there is nothing that influences the High Councilor quite as much as a reasonable argument delivered in a reasonable tone. HuaiSang has always wondered why such a man would choose a life companion that is rarely ever capable of calm and reasonable argument. As he expected, Jiang FengMian is nodding even before HuaiSang has finished speaking, making it clear that between the two of them, Jin GuangShan will find his complaint neatly swept to the side. Familiar with the High Councilor’s tendencies to fold in the face of mildest possible pressure, Jin GuangShan appears unhappy, but offers no further complaints.

“Young Master Lan,” the High Councilor says, “the Council requests to be informed of any changes in the Emperor’s condition. Until then, I believe we have no further need of you.”

Lan XiChen bows, and is escorted out of the hall. HuaiSang fights a small stab of resentment that A-Jue escorts the man personally, when a dozen Nie Sect members would have done just as well. Maybe he no longer needs A-Jue’s support, now that the Emperor’s seat is no longer in peril, but he would have liked to have that support nonetheless.

“I believe that we may rest easily tonight, and meet again on the morrow,” Jiang FengMian says, “Is the Royal Companion in agreement?”

The Royal Companion is very much in agreement. He may have promised Jin GuangShan that his disciple will come to no harm, but HuaiSang has no qualms about breaking his word.

#the untamed #cql #mdzs #ficlet #m #wwx emperor au #two in one #both are short chapters so i figured what the hell #probably wangji's pov in the next chapter #then creepy story time by xue yang in the one after #i would like to go back to being three chapters ahead of the published #but it's looking like two will do for now #ily chickens

[leafs-lover]

Because Two People Got Drunk: 23

Series Masterlist

Chapter 23

Summary: Your trip in Greece is coming to an end; conversations of the future and the state of your relationship ensue.

Warning: Swearing, smut, oral sex (male and female receiving), kind of public smut but not really?

Word Count: 7200

“What do you think Ollie is doing?” you ask the next morning while looking into the closet for clothes.

“He is having a bath” Fred exclaims showing you a picture of Oliver in the bathtub at his parents’ house, bubbles surrounding him as he has a huge smile on his face. “Mom said when she turned her back to check on the pancakes he reached into the batter bowl to pull out a blueberry. The entire thing spilled on him so now he is having a bath.”

You both laugh as he shows you the pictures of your son covered in batter “he loves his blueberries” you say.

“Get dressed in something comfortable we have some walking today. But wear a bathing suit underneath” he places a quick kiss on your cheek before walking out of the room.

A few minutes later you are sitting in the passenger seat of the rental car, Fred’s hand gently resting on your thigh as he drives along the cliffside roads before stopping in a parking lot. You step out of the car and you and Fred begin the hike up to Akrotiri, his hand laced with yours.

Akrotiri is a village established in the Bronze Age as a fishing and farming village. A few centuries later the area had expanded into significant trade port with Cyprus and Minoan Crete. There is evidence of foreign pottery and copper discovered; indicative of the sophistication of the settlement. There is even paved streets and evidence of a drainage system.

When you arrive you see the village is built on the slopes of a hill, and has a view of the Caldera cliffs. In 16th Century BC there was a series of earthquakes which alerted the community of the possible eruption. The members of the community fled the area leaving behind many of their possessions. A volcanic eruption occurred and the town was covered in volcanic ash which preserved most of the settlement.

Archaeologists have been excavating the area since 1967; there is a path that connects the excavation site to the current town. Inside the excavation area there are walkways suspended above the remains. You explore the village and some of the buildings open to the public. The walls are decorated in magnificent wall-paintings, and there is a large majority of ceramic scattered around.

“This is incredible” you say looking around at the excavation. “Being in a place that is this old makes you really realize how small we are.”

Fred’s hand rests on the small of your back and he kisses your cheek “yeah how our lives are just a small moment in time.”

After a few hours you and Fred make the journey back to your car. He drives to a beach that has a few other patrons scattered around it, but is relatively quiet. He pulls out a blanket from the trunk and some sandwiches he had packed away, setting up a picnic on the beach.

After eating you sit on the blanket watching the deep blue water slowly crash against the shore. “You really are amazing” you say resting your head on his shoulder “you planned an incredible trip, all the details and I had no idea. Like genuinely zero clue you were doing this, you always surprise me.”

“I know I really am the best” Fred jokes placing a hand on your leg “let’s go swim” he says. You look to him and see that the heat is causing beads of sweat to fall down his forehead, glistening in the sunlight.

You both stand up and Fred peels his shirt off leaving him in his bathing suit, you smile as you breathe him in, his chiseled chest and broad shoulders. You step to your tip toes and kiss him, placing your hand lightly on his chest. Fred’s hand lightly touches your back as he kisses you back. You deepen the kiss bringing your other hand to the back of his neck. Fred pulls away, causing you to groan in displeasure. “Senere Kære, er vi ikke alene” he chuckles as he pulls your shirt over your head.

You step out of your shorts as Fred grins seeing you standing in your navy bikini. “Fuck your gorgeous” he says as he scans up and down your body. Your bikini hugs you in the right places, hangs low on your hips; your chest is practically popping out of the top. His eyes are locked on your chest as he pulls you in close to him placing a passionate kiss on your lips. He runs a finger up your side, playing with the knot on your bottoms while his other hands slide down your back stopping on your butt. You pull back slightly and whisper his words “later dear we are not alone” back to him.

He laughs “when did you start learning Danish?” he questions.

“Well my boyfriend kept saying things in Danish and I never knew what he was saying. So I decided to start learning the language. But so far I only know a little bit, still a lot to go.”

“Hmm, is that so?” he questions against your lips.

“My boyfriend and son are Danish; I figured it’s important I learn some. This way I can talk with some of your family members, It’s a part of you and Ollie and any other kids we have, so it should be a part of me too.”

“You are something babe” he mumbles kissing you.

“Also when you start to grumble under your breath in Danish about something I’m making you do I want to know what you’re saying” you joke.

“No idea what you’re talking about” he says staring at you with a smirk on his face.

“Really?” you question. “I remember a lot of grumbling and Danish being said when it came to hanging pictures in the living room. Wish I could have known what you were saying then.”

He looks down at you with his golden brown eyes, lingering as he grins down at you. “I don’t remember that at all” he says kissing you causing you to laugh into the kiss. You pull away and move into the water, you wade in the warmth occasionally stealing kisses. You spend a few hours on the beach before retreating to the hotel.

“You ready yet” Fred calls from the living room. You can see him in the living room sitting on his phone; he has called out to you 3 times already.

“You said we had to leave at 6:30, its only 6:20 so I still have time babe” you reply poking your head around the corner.

He turns his head to look at you “its 6:24 and you aren’t dressed. You aren’t going to be ready on time” he groans.

You walk away laughing and head to the bed where your dress is laid out. A few minutes later you exit the room in an emerald green satin maxi dress. It has adjustable spaghetti straps that crisscross at the back and has a mauve, red, peach, and green floral print. It has a high, fitted waist, with a flowing maxi skirt with a high front slit.

Fred hears you coming and stands up putting his phone in his pocket. When he finally sees’s you his jaw practically drops to the floor.

“Wow, you look incredible” he says walking over to you placing his hands on your hips. He gently kisses you on the lips “absolutely incredible.” You wrap your hands around his neck and kiss him back, “I still have 2 minutes to spare” you say when you pull back.

You turn around to walk when Fred pulls you back towards him “you’re missing something though elskede” he says. You shoot him a confused glance as Fred reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a small red jewelry box and hands it to you. You examine the box, noticing the gold border and Cartier painted across the top.

You look at Fred, and he smiles while raising his eyebrow at you while you open the box. Inside is a pair of white gold brilliant-cut diamond earrings. The main stone is surrounded by multiple smaller stones. The light shimmers off the diamonds no matter the angle you look at them.

“Freddie” you whisper “this is beautiful. It’s too much though.”

“Nothing is too much for you” he says. Your eyes finally meet his and you stand on your tippy toes kissing him. You bring one hand up into his hair and grip the back of his neck, while his hands slide around your waist. Your tongue dances in his mouth when you finally pull away.

“I’m going to put these on then I’ll be ready” you say walking to the mirror. You change the earrings with the ones you are currently wearing; Fred walks up behind you kissing your neck.

“They are stunning” you say clasping the second one. Fred runs his hands up your arms “just like you” he says kissing your cheek. You turn around and wrap your hands in his hair pulling his face closer to yours as your lips connect. Your hands grip his red hair, as he leans down, hands cupping your ass.

Your hands tangle as the kiss intensifies, you rolling your hips eliciting a soft moan from Fred’s lips. You finally pull away, you’re both gasping for air. A smile spreads across your face while you bring a hand up and wipe some lipstick you left on his lips. He glances to the clock behind which says 6:31 “told you we’d be late” he grabs your hand and leads you out of the room.

“Wow, look at this, it’s breathtaking” you say looking out at the view from the table. Fred booked you a table at an amazing romantic restaurant during sunset; it has dramatic views of the caldera and the deep blue Aegean sea.

“Yeah it is, but you even more beautiful” Fred says grabbing your hand and giving it a light squeeze.

“You are ridiculous you know that?” you joke rolling your eyes.

“I just don’t know if you know how beautiful you are” he says sipping his red wine.

“I mean you only tell me 5 times a day”

“Oh, I should be telling you more than that” he says causing you both to laugh.

You fall into a casual conversation as you sit at the end of the outdoor patio enjoying your dinner. You sit and watch the beautiful sunset, after dinner the waiter returns to your table to clear your table.

“Can I interest you in some dessert?” he asks returning to the table. You think back to the menu, and remember reading about the pies and cakes earlier. If the desert is half as good as the entre you know you are in for a treat, your mouth begins to water.

Without even waiting for your response Fred says yes and orders you the chocolate cake with caramel drizzle. “You know me so well” you say smiling at him.

“No you are just predictable with deserts, chocolate.”

A few minutes later the waiter returns setting down the plate with two forks.

“Oh this is amazing” you moan taking a bite of the decadent cake. Fred leans over the table and says in a hushed tone “I can’t wait to make those sounds later.”

Your eyes go wide, feeling wetness pool in your core. Fred keeps his eyes locked on you, a devilish grin on his face as he takes a small piece of cake on his fork.  After swallowing a piece of cake, he sets his fork down and wipes the side of his mouth with the napkin.

He stands up, pulling you with him. He places a hand on the small of your back leading you out to the car. His hand slides down to your ass as he reaches around you for the door handle. Before opening the door you turn around and pull him against you.

Fred presses you against the car, his hands squeezing your hips tightly. You roll your hips into his, one hand squeezing his side the other firmly gripping his bicep. One of his hands slides to the high slip on your dress, pushing its way through the fabric. You bring your leg up and bend it, further exposing your skin.

Fred’s tongue continues to swirl around in your mouth, his large hand slides up your thigh, pushing through the slit. His finger grazes over your clothed core when you giggle and pull back. You hear Fred take a deep breath, before his mouth attaches to your neck.

“Freddie” you moan.

“Yes dear” he mumbles nipping your neck.

You playfully attempt to push him off you, but he overpowers you pushing you against the car chuckling against your neck.

“Babe come on” you groan as he sucks on your sweet spot one hand firmly squeezing your ass.

“Someone might come” you moan feeling his erection press into your pelvis.

“So” he says a finger slipping under your underwear.

“Ohh” you moan feeling him lightly graze your folds. “Our hotel is 10 minutes away” you say gripping his wrist pushing him off you. Fred smirks at you before re-adjusting himself and opening your door.

When you finally return to the hotel room Fred immediately pins you against the wall, his mouth attached to yours. Your hand untucks his shirt and makes it way to his hard stomach before finding his treasure line. Fred reaches down and grabs under your thighs, hoisting you up.  Your mouth doesn’t leave his as he walks over to couch sitting down.

You sit on your knees and grab the hem of his shirt and pull it over his head before reconnecting your mouth to his chest. One of Fred’s hands slides up gently caressing your ass. His other returns to the slit of your dress, and begins to caress the exposed skin. He moves his hand to the zipper of your dress but before he can you slowly slide off Fred and onto your knees in front of him. You hear him mumbling in Danish as you start to undo his belt. After removing his belt you undo his pants and slide them off his large thighs.

Your hands slide up his thighs as you place soft kisses on his legs. Your hand begins to palm him over his boxers; you can feel his erection straining the thin fabric waiting to be freed. You gently toy with the elastic before looking up at him. You lock eyes and you pull them off, Fred lifts his hips to help you. As the fabric comes down you hear his hard cock slap against his stomach.

You bring your eyes down to look at it, precum dripping from the tip causing you to lick your lips. The tip is red and throbbing as you bring it to your mouth, licking him up. Your hands gently slide up and down his thigh as you place soft kisses on his cock. You open your mouth and move to take him in. You look up to him and Fred groans as you take him in your mouth. You start slow, gently bobbing on him, using your hand to take what your mouth can’t fit.

Your hand and mouth work together as you continue slowly bobbing on him. You pull your hand down to his thigh and begin stroking them up and down as you take more of him in your mouth. You continue your motions, taking more of him each time.

After a few minutes of having him in your mouth, you increase the pace. You hollow your cheek to take all of him; his hand comes to your hair moving it from your face. You look up at him through your lashes, locking eyes as he hits the back of your throat.

Fred rocks his hips, causing you to gag slightly as some spit dribbles out of your mouth. Some of your hair begins to fall in front of your face; Fred slides his hand in your hair pulling it into a ponytail behind your head. You continue sucking on him and stroking his thighs.

“Babe…I’m gonna…I’m” he starts to mumble. You feel his thighs tighten indicating he is almost done and you gently squeeze on them. You swirl your tongue around him a few times before you deep throat him and feel his warm cum hit the back of your throat.

You continue sucking on him until he stops. You lick him up and pull your mouth away and stand up. Fred pulls you into his lap and wipes some off your chin. He brings his finger to your mouth and you open it, swirling your tongue around his finger.

“Fucking hell” he says as you continue to suck on his finger. He pulls his hand from you and stands up throwing you over his shoulder; “Freddie” you squeal. He carries you down the hall to the bedroom, bringing a hand up to smack your ass. You giggle as he throws you on the bed, quickly crawling on top of you.

Today is your fourth and final full day in Santorini. The trip has been amazing, you and Fred have spent the days exploring the beautiful island learning about the history, and the nights tangled in the bed together. You fly back tomorrow at 3pm, so you plan on exploring the capital tomorrow.

You are in a light sleep when you begin to feel light kisses being placed on your core. Your eyes flutter open when you feel a tongue slip inside your walls. You look down and see a shirtless Fred lying on his stomach, your legs hooked over his shoulders; his hands gripping your ass.

A soft moan escapes your lips and you feel Fred smile between your legs. He gently licks the outside of your slit, tasting your juices. Fred moves his tongue from your left to the right dragging it across your entrance in the process, eliciting a sharp breath from you.

His tongue presses further inside your walls, his beard rubbing against your thighs. His hand slides under your shirt up your stomach along your rib cage, and along the outer edge of your breasts. He continues sliding his hand up and down the same trail a few more times getting closer and closer to your nipples each time, grazing your areolas.

He begins circling your breasts with his hands, occasionally pinching your nipples as his tongue applies more pressure. He begins exploring inside of you, finally pressing his tongue as far in as it could.

You begin to feel the ball building in your stomach, as you take in a few sharp breaths. Fred eases up the pressure, becoming gentler in his motions, earning a whimper from you as you were getting close to your release.

His tongue doesn’t move from you, continuing to fuck inside you with it. Your hands grip the bedsheets as his nose brushes against your clit. Your breathing becomes deeper; nipples are hard while beads of sweat develop on your forehead and neck.

You rotate your hips slightly, and clench your legs around his head. Fred increases the pressure, pinching your nipple.

“Holy shit” you moan; Fred increases his rhythm. Your orgasm washes over you; your knuckles go white as you tightly grip the sheets, your walls tense against his tongue. Fred doesn’t move, his tongue continues to thrust inside of you as your breathing becomes normal.

Fred releases your legs, and crawls up your body on his elbows. Sweat has gathered in sections across your body and you stare back at him with a smile on your face; you see some of your juices on his chin and in his beard. Fred closes the gap and kisses you; you taste yourself on him sliding your hands up his biceps as you scratch his back.

“Good morning” he mumbles against your lips.

“Definitely is a good morning. You should wake me up like that every day” you say kissing him again.

“I’ll see what I can do” he mumbles kissing your collarbone.

“You order breakfast?” you ask smelling the dark roast coffee.

“Mhm” he hums sucking on your neck his hand sliding under your shirt “breakfast is the most important meal skat.”

He lowers himself and begins kissing the exposed skin of your stomach eliciting soft moans from your lips. Your stomach growls loudly causing Fred to groan and laugh; “I guess you need to eat” he says crawling away pulling you out from under the duvet.

After breakfast you head to Mesa Pigadia a small, quiet beach with large pebbles and dark blue, crystal-clear waters where you take out some kayaks along coast. There is the occasional patron on the beach, but the area is relatively quiet. You pass by the red and black sand beaches along the way to some sea caves. “This is amazing” you say taking his hand as you step out of the kayak, “how long have you been planning this for?” you question.

“Not too long, just a couple weeks… or months” he says kissing your cheek.

“Is that all?” you question raising your eyebrow at him.

“Well I wanted this summer to be special, so I brought you to the place that I thought might compare to your beauty” he says placing a light kiss on your lips. “It doesn’t by the way” he whispers in your ear causing you to roll your eyes. Fred pulls his shirt over his head, leaving him in his bathing suit. You smile seeing his tanned and firm upper body.

“You know once you have the girl you can stop with the cheesy lines” you joke. Fred laughs wrapping his arms around your waist “not a cheesy line, it’s the truth” he places a soft kiss on your forehead. He hands you a snorkel and you strip down to your bathing suit before jumping into the clear blue water, Fred following behind you. You see the colourful coral and vibrant fish while you explore the caves. As you are swimming you feel Fred touch your arm, he points to your side, you follow his gaze with your eyes and you are taken back.

You see a 4 foot loggerhead turtle swimming a few feet away. It has a reddish-brown shell as it glides through the water with ease. You and Fred float in the water staring at it for what feels like forever but likely was only a minute before it swims out of view. You both pop up and Fred pulls out his mouthpiece “that was amazing!”

“I can’t believe we just saw that, that was incredible!” you say as Fred pulls you close and places a kiss on your lips. Your hands grip the back of his neck as you continue kissing him, floating in the calm waters of the cave. Fred pulls back “want to head back?” he questions. You nod as you swim back to the kayaks.

You step up onto the shore, water dripping down your sun kissed skin. You walk up to Fred and lock him in a deep, passionate kiss “we should get back” he whispers his hands lightly placed on your waist.

“You sure” you whisper, your hand sliding down his treasure line over the front of his bathing suit, you palm over him and feel him begin to harden under you. Fred grips your wrist and pushes it off of you, a grin on his face. You smirk at him; standing on your tippy toes you kiss Fred. Your hands snake into his hair, pulling his head down to you; you push your hips forward feeling him through his bathing suit.

His hands on your hip push you back onto flat feet, you grin up at Fred who pulls you in closer to his chest. “You’re lucky there is nothing in here for me to bend you over” he growls into your ear.

His hand slides down your back, under your bathing suit. He starts to stroke your bare ass as he begins sucking on your neck, a whimper leaving your lips. Fred grins before leaning down to kiss you, you feel his hands wander your body and don’t even notice what he is doing until you feel your bottoms hit your feet.

Your eyes go wide and you pull away from him slightly. Fred sucks on your bottom lip, as he brings a hand to your folds. He toys with the entrance, gently opening them up as you moan. He slips two fingers in and begins pumping them, your head falls back and Fred bites the newly exposed area of your neck.

“Fred…what if…what if someone comes” you barely manage to say as he thrusts his long fingers in and out. He uses a leg to spread your legs a little wider, bringing his thumb up to press circles into your clit.

“You should have thought of that before you teased me” he replies increasing the pace.

“Fuck” you mumble as is quickly pumping inside you. You rock your hips to increase the friction and hear Fred chuckle. He continues to fuck his fingers in and out of you and slips a third one in. The third finger brings you to the edge of your orgasm, the ball building in your stomach.

“Babe” you whine your hands gripping onto his biceps, trying to brace yourself for what you know is about to happen.

“You gonna cum?” Fred asks but you know he knows the answer. A whimper leaves your mouth as you feel your walls begin to tighten, just as you are about to fall over the edge everything stops. Fred pulls his fingers from you and wipes them on his bathing suit.

“What?” you ask unable to form a clear sentence. Fred steps away and over to the bag and pulls his shirt over his head.

“You think you get to do whatever you want. You think you can tease me all day long, well two can play at that game.” Before you have a chance to respond Fred kisses your cheek and hands you your clothes “sucks doesn’t it?”

You pull away; Fred has a large grin on his face. You stand there for a moment locked in a staring contest. Fred steps closer to you and places his mouth beside your ear “you can try to take care of yourself, but it won’t be the same. We both know you can’t take care of yourself the way I do, but if you want to try I’m not in a rush.”

He doesn’t move, his breath on your neck sending goosebumps down your spine. You consider his words, and you know he is right. You can get the job done yourself but you know it won’t be the same. And the fear of someone showing up is concerning to you. You take a step back from Fred who is still smirking at you; you shake your head and huff in disapproval before shimmying your wet bottoms back up your legs and throwing your clothes over top.

Fred smiles, knowing he has won and helps you get into your kayak to make the journey back. When you return the kayaks Fred stops at a small café on the way back to the hotel to grab some sandwiches and salad to eat back at the hotel.

After you finish eating on the patio you head inside to shower the salt water off of you. You curl your hair into beachy waves and apply your makeup in a natural fashion. You stand in your wrap trying to pick something to wear when Fred walks out from the bathroom. You watch him walk by, his towel hung low on his hips, water dripping down his abs. His wavy red hair is damp, and you can tell he hasn’t brushed it yet, merely running his hand through it to pull it from his eyes.

“You know you could wear nothing and you would look amazing” he mumbles wrapping his arms around you playfully pulling at the strings of your robe.

You laugh lightly “you say that because you love it when I wear nothing.”

“Very true, but I do love you in everything and anything. I ordered dinner, so you have 20 minutes babe” he kisses your cheek and places a light slap on your ass. You squeal and jump slightly while Fred walks to the other side of the room to his dresser. You turn around to say something but in that moment Fred drops the towel from his waist. You see his large thighs, his tan line from his bathing suit; and his butt, that is a lighter colour in comparison. You have the urge to walk over and cup his ass when he bends over to pick out a pair of boxers from the bottom drawer. You can see part of his member as it hangs before he stands up straight pulling it out of view.

Your eyes slowly walk up his back, before finding his eyes staring back at you. A devilish grin has spread across his face; you feel your cheeks immediately go red.

“I see you like it when I wear nothing too” he grins before pulling his boxers up over his toned ass. You turn away to your clothes as you hear Fred getting dressed behind you. You use all your willpower to not turn around and look at him because you know if you do you won’t be able to stop yourself. You hear silence and you finally will yourself to turn around and see that he has left the room.

About 10 minutes later you walk out to the balcony and see Fred in a tight white button up shirt tucked into his khaki pants. Your breath catches in your throat as you move toward him. Fred hears your heels and looks up “every day you get a little more beautiful” he says kissing you. You are dressed in a white and blue floral romper, it has thin straps with an intricate crochet overlaid on top. “But if we’re being honest I prefer you in nothing” he growls in your ear.

“Same babe” you whisper.

You sit outside eating dinner and drinking wine together when Fred moves to the food cart the hotel left earlier and places a decadent piece of chocolate cake on the table. Before sitting down he pulls you into his lap. He takes the fork and feeds both of you the cake, your mouth waters the entire time. But not because of the cake but the man that is feeding you.

He scoops the last piece on the fork and moves to feed it to you, but quickly puts it in his mouth. He slowly pulls the fork from his mouth as your jaw drops “Frederik I can’t believe –“ before you can finish Fred locks you in a deep kiss. You can taste the cake on his lips “you know what calling me Frederik does” he groans.

You move to place soft kisses on his neck below his ear “I don’t know what you’re talking about” you mumble sucking on his neck “Frederik.”

Fred abruptly stands up; you practically fall off and burst out laughing. Fred picks you up throwing you over his shoulder carrying you to the bedroom. You reach down to grab Fred’s ass, but before you can he brings a hand up and places a smack on yours causing you to squeal. When you reach the bedroom he throws you onto the bed and quickly is on top of you.

He rests his hands on either side of your head. He leans down locking you in a passionate kiss. Based on the playfulness of the last few hours and the 3 bottles of wine you have consumed you expect it to be rushed and sloppy but find it to be soft and tender. You moan into the kiss as his tongue dances in your mouth.

One of your hands slide under his shirt feeling his muscular back. Your nails lightly drag up and down his back as he begins lightly sucking on your neck. Your hand moves around to his chest and you begin unbuttoning his shirt. Fred’s right hand slips down to your leg and gently begins drawing circles on your thigh before slipping it up under the hem of your romper shorts. He lightly strokes his fingers over your clothed core.

Your back arches as you push his shirt off his shoulders. Fred brings his hand up and pushes your straps off your shoulders. He helps you slide out of your romper, placing soft kisses on your chest and stomach. Once he has removed your romper he kisses your neck while undoing your bra. Your hands explore his bare muscular back. Once he has removed your bra he begins to gently massage your breast before bringing his mouth down the suck on the other one.

“Fred" you moan out as your hands slide down to his belt making quick work of the buckle. When you unbutton his pants he lifts away and rids himself of them and his boxers leaving himself completely exposed. You lean on your elbows and stare at him. You look down at his hard cock while you lick your lips; you see the leaked precum and think about is having him in your mouth. “Not tonight baby” Fred says pushing you so you are lying on your back and pulls your panties down your legs “not tonight baby”

He returns to the bed, lifting your legs over his shoulder while lying down on his stomach. He stares into your dripping cunt; you feel his breath on it as his beard grazes your thighs. He licks a stripe up you and mumbles “fuck you’re so wet baby.”

“You do this to me baby” you say causing Fred to groan loudly.

He continues placing light licks on you for a few minutes before he brings two fingers and slowly slides them into you. You cry out as he begins to slowly thrust in and out of you, while sucking on your clit. Your hand falls down to his hair as he continues to gently pump in and out of you.

You can feel your ball beginning to form deep in your stomach, but you know it will take a while at this speed. Fred knows it too, but he doesn’t pick up his pace. His fingers slowly curl in and out hitting your spot every time. His mouth slides from your clit into your folds as he licks inside you. “Taste good too" he mumbles.

At that moment his pace picks up his fingers being thrust into you. “Fuck" you cry out gripping his hair tightly. The ball in your stomach is close to bubbling over and this encourages Fred. His thumb massages your clit as his fingers pump in and out hitting your sweet spot every time.

“Cum for me baby” he says. You bring a hand up and start playing with your perked breast. Fred sucks on your pubic bone, as his fingers continue pumping inside you.

Your orgasm comes crashing over you; you grip his hair while your toes curl. Your orgasm is long, and Fred doesn’t stop his hand until you have finished. He pulls his fingers from you and replaces them with his mouth.

You wince at the feeling, still sensitive from your first orgasm. He gently licks up your juices and places light kisses on your thigh and stomach. Your breathing has steadied and you have regained enough of yourself; you attempt to push Fred to his back.

You want him in your mouth, want to taste his precum, but Fred doesn’t let you.

Instead he crawls back up, placing his hands on both sides of your head. He leans down and kisses you passionately as your tongue swirls with his. Your hand attempts to grab his shaft, but Fred grabs your wrist. He brings it above your head, before grabbing your other. He holds both of them above your head with his left hand and uses his right to line himself up.

You can feel him poking at your entrance, and as he slides in he leans down locking you in a deep kiss. Your walls being stretched by him causes you to moan into the kiss as he begins to set a slow and steady pace.

He pulls his face away from yours, looking into your eyes while thrusting into you. Every time he bottoms out before almost pulling fully out. He slams back into you.

His eyes are dark as he continues the pace, his forehead pressed against yours. Normally the slower pace wouldn’t have you reaching your high, but the feeling of him deep inside you, hitting your g-spot has your second orgasm of the night approaching.

“Freddie" you moan arching your hips into him. You want nothing more than to feel his biceps under your nails but he still has your hands pinned above your head. He lowers his face and kisses you, while keeping his pace. Your orgasm continues to build.

“You close babygirl?” he whispers in your ear, although you know he knows the answer. You open your mouth to answer but no words come out only filthy sounds.

Fred lifts his head to look at you; a devilish grin has spread across his face. “Words babe, use your words.”

You moan again as his hips snap into you, but you finally manage to whimper “yes.” His mouth latches on your nipple sucking on it. Your back arches as you move in tandem with him. Your orgasm is right there and as you are about to let go Fred whispers “wait for me babe kay?”

You groan loudly, unsure if you are able to meet his request “you can do it skat" he says still thrusting into you. You lift your hips trying to push Fred to his high soon and it works, you feel him getting sloppy.

Your eyes snap closed from the feeling of trying to hold back, the pleasure becoming too much. You keep them closed trying to focus on breathing so you don’t release without him.

“Open your eyes (Y/N/N)” he says as you feel him stuttering inside you “for me babe.” You muster the energy to look at him as soon as you look into his eyes your high comes. You are unable to control yourself as you spasm around him.

Fred’s dick immediately twitches and you feel his warmth spills deep inside you paining your walls white. When you both finish Fred places light kisses on your nose and forehead.

He releases your hands, and runs his hands through your hair “I love watching you” he whispers as he lays on top of you but somehow you feel like that isn’t what he really wants to say.

You begin to lightly stroke his shoulder and bicep as you doze off. You wake up a few minutes later when you feel the bed shift. Fred leaves and walks to the bathroom; he comes back a few minutes later in his boxers. He has a damp cloth and gently cleans you up, placing soft kisses on your stomach at the same time.

When he finishes he finds a t-shirt for you and pulls it over your head. He lies on his back, you tucked tightly into his arm as you begin to doze off when you hear him whisper “jeg elsker dig.” 

“What was that babe?” you mumble.

“Mm, oh nothing. Go to sleep babe.” 

The next day you wake up early, and are sitting on the large living room couch drinking coffee while on your phone.

“What are you doing babe?” Fred asks sitting beside you. 

“I’m using google translate” he raises an eye brow at you. “Well as you know my boyfriend speaks Danish and I’m trying to learn it.”

“Mhm, I might have been told that” he says, his finger touching your shoulder.

“Well I don’t know everything so I still need to google some things. But I don’t know how things are spelt in Danish.” 

He laughs as you continue “I did figure out what smuk means though, you’ve been saying that one for a while.” 

“Well you are very beautiful dear” he replies. 

“I’m trying to figure out what you said last night. Actually you have said it a few times now. Something like jeg elesek, jeg du ekelse. Something like that I think.” 

He looks at you and smiles saying “jeg elsker dig.”  

“YES! How do you spell that?” you place your coffee on the table and be begins to spell it out, as soon as you press the translate button and you look up at him. “Freddie” you say softly as you shift to sit on his lap.

“I have loved you since you came to Denmark 2 years ago” he whispers. 

A big smile comes across your face “I’m gonna butcher this but…jeg elsker dig.”  

He smiles whispering “close enough” he pulls your face to his as he kisses you, but you hold back not fully leaning into it. Fred senses this and stops, looking into your eyes. 

“Babe what -?” 

“Remember when Auston visited us?” Fred nods. “You made a comment…uh…said something about having another baby.” 

Fred takes a deep breath “yes I remember” he replies. 

“Did...Did you uh- did you” you trail off before Fred finishes your question “mean it?” 

“Yeah” you whisper. 

“Of course I did, wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t. I want more babies with you; I mean how could I not? Our first one is the best. I told you a couple nights ago I want see us with more kids. Do you want more kids?”

“Of course I do Fred, our first one is pretty great and I love seeing you as a Dad. Watching you with Oliver makes my ovaries explode” you say not looking at him. “But do you want another one now? You said something not using birth control and putting another baby in me.” 

Fred chuckles lightly “Okay the alcohol might have made me not say it the best way. But yes babe I want another baby with you. And I’m ready whenever you are.” 

“You don’t think 2 young babies will be hard? Oliver isn’t even two yet.” 

“Oh I know it will be, but I know if anyone can handle it, it’s us” he pulls you in and places a light kiss on your lips. “No pressure babe. Can be now, 6 months from now, 2 years from now. Just let me know when you’re ready.”

He leans in to place another light kiss on your lips “it’s your body, and you are the only one of us using birth control. So whenever you want to get off it just let me know.” You bring your hand up to this side of his face deepening it before finally pulling away as you whisper “okay.” 

“Is that okay I’m ready, or okay I‘ll let you know when I am ready?” 

Green dress:

The earrings:

Your romper:

Next Chapter

#frederik andersen #Freddie Andersen #fred andersen #fred andersen smut #frederik andersen x reader #Fred Andersen Fic #frederik andersen fic #frederik andersen smut #freddie andersen smut #freddie andersen fic #freddie andersen x reader #nhl fic #nhl smut #fred andersen x reader #fredzilla #because two people got drunk #my writing

[taeken-my-heart]

Moirai Chapter 15

Summary: On your 18th birthday a name appears on your wrist. The name of your soulmate. It’s a momentous day that everyone looks forward to, but you’ve always brushed aside; refusing to believe in a fickle mistress called destiny. But what happens when on the morning of your 18th birthday you wake to find the name of your mortal enemy? Jeon Jungkook.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader Genre: Soulmates au/ Enemies to lovers au. Angst, fluff, bickering, romance, eventual smut.

Word Count: 4580

NOTES: Next chapter is THE chapter...if you catch my drift ;) It will be coming out VERY soon, so keep an eye out for that. This chapter is slightly shorter than others, but next chapter will be longer than normal, so I hope that will make up for it!

**

You weren’t sure you would ever get used to the feeling of Jimin’s absence. It had been just over a month since you’d broken up and it was like a cavern in your chest. You hadn’t had much distraction at first, at least until Lizzy found out.

It had been overwhelming when she found out. She was the type of friend that liked to coddle and you just wanted to forget everything and be alone. Eventually, she found a distraction that worked for you, spending multiple nights a week bringing you dinner and conversation.

Your schedules didn’t always match up but somehow, she always made it work. She’d find you at work and sit with you in the breakroom sharing her hummus and chips. She’d find you outside of the hospital sitting on one of the benches, waiting to be entertained with jokes and lively stories. Or, like tonight, she’d find you at home.

A rare night off for the both of you, Lizzy had come over with takeout and a cheesy romcom from the 90’s you’d already seen one too many times. One more time couldn’t hurt, though.

You’d recently moved to a new apartment and most of your stuff was still in boxes, but you had a beanbag chair and a love seat to enjoy. The sofa had been Jimin’s purchase so you were lacking in a better seating arrangement until you could find time to search for your own couch.

Lizzy stretched lethargically across the arms of the loveseat, takeout pasta dish in her lap as she slurped noisily and you wiggled around in the beanbag chair, trying to find a more comfortable position. “I told you I can take the beanbag!” Lizzy said, turning to look at you and you shook your head, holding your own bowl of pasta to your chest as you readjusted once more.

“No way, you’re my guest, Liz.”

“I’m your best friend; that hardly counts.” She said, standing from the loveseat and hovering in front of you, “get up.”

“Seriously, I got this.” You insisted and Lizzy frowned, hand going to rest on her jutted hip.

“You look like a beached whale right now. Up, up.”

You huffed, putting your food on the floor beside you and rolling onto your knees with a groan. “Wow, things really are not the same when you’re in your 30’s.” You complained, standing and bending over to grab your food. Lizzy settled into the beanbag with a contented sigh and you resigned yourself to the (far more comfortable) loveseat.

“We need a vacation.” Lizzy announced loudly and you looked over at her while reaching over for your glass of wine on the TV dinner table between the two of you. It was rickety, precarious with age; as old as your high school diploma. Back before you’d ever even met Jimin or learned how to be delicate with your things.  A quick trip to the thrift store on your way to your first semester of college had deemed you its new owner. Who knows how many had owned it before?

“What made you think that so suddenly?” You questioned.

“To be fair,” she slurped a noodle loudly and you waited, “I’ve been thinking about it for a while, but I’m just now saying it. We’re tired and overworked and I want to sit somewhere on a beach in a bikini that shows off a little bit too much of my cellulite and drink an appletini that makes me feel a little too dizzy and just live my life. You know?”

You smiled, sipping over the rim of your glass and humming. “Maybe your soulmate is on that beach.” You teased and Lizzy’s eyes lit up, leaning forward in the beanbag.

“You’re so right. So where should we go? I’m thinking Mallorca. My sister went there last year and said it was unbelievably gorgeous.”

“Sure, we can go to Mallorca. I can’t do it for a couple months, though. I’ve already taken a few days off for my sister’s wedding so I doubt I could take more time off so soon after.”

Lizzy hummed, taking a sip of her own wine. “That’s right, when’s her wedding again?”

“The 20th of next month.” You sighed, leaning your head back against the headrest of your chair and spacing out on the television.

“You gonna be OK?”

You paused, watching the colors dance across your vision before lifting your head to look at your friend. “What do you mean?”

“You gonna be ok at your sister’s wedding? I know you, Y/N. You act like things are OK when they’re not. Do you want me to go as your plus one?” She’d finished her pasta by now, empty bowl discarded beside her on the floor.

You sighed again, looking back at the television. “What do you want me to say? Jimin absolutely broke me. I’m absolutely not OK, everything hurts and every morning I wake up thinking maybe it’ll be better and it’s just not. I know someday it will be ok, but it was 8 years, you know? Now I get to go sit at my sister’s wedding and watch her marry her soulmate while my own is,” you paused, realizing you had yet to tell your friend about Jungkook. Now was not the time. “Well, anyway. I’m not OK…but I will be.”

“I’m sorry,” Lizzy frowned, twisting her fingers around her glass. “I shouldn’t have asked. For what it’s worth, though, I know you’ll get through it. You’re pretty amazing, you always bounce back and this time will be no different, it just might take a little longer.”

You nodded, heart clenching at the thought of more time. More time to sit and think about Jimin and hurt. Sometimes you wish you could just turn your heart off.

Later, after Lizzy had left home and you’d finished cleaning up your living room, you made your way towards your bedroom, flicking on the lights. There were only a couple boxes left unpacked in here. You’d wanted a sense of normalcy in at least one room so you’d chosen to focus on your bedroom.

Lizzy had come over and helped you hang up the fairy lights across your ceiling. They cast a much softer glow than the actual light in the center of the room and you liked that warm feeling, like a security blanket over your heart.

This apartment was smaller than the last, you couldn’t afford to spend your one paycheck on two extra bedrooms you didn’t need. Instead, you’d stuffed your office supplies inside the smaller second bedroom. Eventually this place would feel like home and it wouldn’t haunt you with memories in every corner. It was blissfully blank.

Ella was coming out for her final dress fitting tomorrow and you’d be joining her for your own. You’d been eating one too many pieces of chocolate recently so you were a little concerned it wouldn’t fit quite right, but maybe if you sucked in enough it would work out.

You sat on the side of your tub, brushing your teeth languidly as you thought. Apartments were eerily quiet when you lived in them alone. Granted, you lived on the top floor all the way at the end so you really only had to worry about one wall, and that neighbor was apparently some kind of producer, so he was never there.

You missed the noise of another person, though. The thought overwhelmed you suddenly, the vast emptiness of it all and your eyes stung as they filled with tears. Crying with toothpaste slathered all over your mouth was not the look you were going for so you quickly rinsed out your mouth before sitting back on the edge of the tub.

You knew you were still young, still had time, but it honestly felt like a ticking time bomb. You weren’t getting any younger, already close to turning 31 and you felt like your dreams of the future you had were slipping from between your fingertips.

Your dreams with Jimin were gone, like ash in the wind. That you would have to let go of…but to be in love, to be a mother…those were difficult pills to swallow. Tonight, like many other nights before, you wondered what would have happened if Jungkook hadn’t turned you down. Would you be in love? Would you be married and have children?

You supposed it was silly to wonder if you’d be in love, you’d never seen the universe pair people up incorrectly, even if it seemed like maybe it had at first. Jimin said he’d had a couple of soulmates in his office before, but you’d never seen it yourself and you just wondered if that was just that those individuals were unwilling to work with anyone.

If you and Jungkook had given each other a chance…well, maybe you could have been magical. It was futile to still think about it, even though he was back in your life. There was no way of really knowing if that was something he even wanted. Sure, he’d seemed apologetic and like he wanted to make amends…but perhaps that was just to satiate his guilt, or maybe he felt sorry about losing your friendship or perhaps you were only a backup plan, in case he couldn’t find anyone else better.

You scoffed, standing from the edge of the tub and rinsing off your toothbrush before flipping off the bathroom lights and heading back into your bedroom. You wiped at your cheeks, willing yourself to stop crying. It didn’t help anything to mope and it certainly didn’t help to imagine things you couldn’t possibly know.

You slipped under the covers, pulling them up to your chin and staring out into the dark across your mattress, feeling far emptier than it had in a long time. It may have been foolish to imagine all those things, but no one ever communicated that to your heart and she loved to mourn what she’d never even had.

 **

It was the perfect day to wear a sundress. You’d shaved your legs, scrubbed your face from any puffiness from crying and were now sat outside a nearby café waiting for Ella and your mom to arrive. Late summer was beautiful and you let the sun warm your legs as you sought shelter under your table’s umbrella, running your fingers across the metal of the chair.

You were tired this morning. Negative thoughts had kept you awake for most of the night, but with a dress appointment and work later tonight, you wouldn’t have much of an opportunity to make up for it.

Across the street you saw your mom’s car pull into a parking spot and you waved as she and your sister both stepped from the car, scanning the sidewalk for you. They smiled, waving back, before making their way to the crosswalk and you waited patiently.

“Sweetheart!” Your mom called and you stood, reaching out to hug her as they got closer.

She held you close, a little too tight and warm for the weather, but you sunk into the embrace. She only lived an hour away, but you hadn’t seen her much recently and with everything going on, you were exhausted and just needed to hug your mom.

“How are you?” She asked, standing back and rubbing her thumb across your cheek. “You look tired.”

You smiled, soft, shaking your head at her. “I’m ok. Didn’t sleep well last night. Morning, Ella!”

Ella squealed, flinging her arms out for a hug and you chuckled as she embraced you. “I’m so excited! It’s almost here!”

“I know,” you agreed, “I can hardly believe it. Feels like just yesterday we were little kids and you were stealing all my clothes.”

Ella chuckled, grabbing your hand and leading you back towards the table. She took her seat across from you with your mother in the middle and set her purse delicately in her lap before replying. “Well, now you’re always dressed in scrubs. I think it’s safe to say my fashion sense is better than yours.”

You smiled, shrugging, “I don’t know, this dress is pretty cute.”

“True.” Ella admitted, “You live too far to steal from now, though.”

“Remind me when you’re coming back home again?” Your mother asked, perusing the menu and you picked up your own to start looking.

“The day before the wedding. It’s pretty hard to get more time off right now.”

“I can’t believe you’re going to miss my bachelorette party.” Ella pouted, sipping at the water the waiter dropped off.

“I know,” you sighed, closing your menu. You’d been to this place a few times and always got the same thing; you weren’t sure why you kept checking the menu as if something would have changed. “I really wanted to go, but they’ll already be down an anesthesiologist that week so they really can’t afford to let me go for too long.”

“Are you ladies ready to order?” Your server asked, pen and paper ready and after you’d ordered and handed over your menu’s, conversation resumed.

“So, what’s dad doing right now? Laying around in his boxers?” You asked and your mother laughed.

“Most likely.”

“Gross.” Ella scoffed and your mother poked her in the side.

“Hey now, I happen to really enjoy that view.”

“Double gross!” Ella complained and you sipped at your lemonade. It was nice being with your family again, even though your father was currently not here. It had been months since you’d seen them all together, months since you’d had enough time saved up to take off and drive home for a few days. You were trying to get as much guided experience as you could while you still had someone supervising your every move. Taking extra time off just wasn’t reasonable right now.

“Is Michael at work today?” You asked, watching as your sister thanked the waiter and sipped at the martini he’d just brandished.

“Yeah, I didn’t want him here anyway. It’s bad luck to see the bride in her dress before the wedding. I don’t need any bad juju on my special day.”

“You don’t really believe in that stuff, do you?” Your mother teased and Ella nodded earnestly.

“Totally! I’ve got my apartment all set up to invite positive feng shui in and I do yoga every morning and night. It’s really brought a lot of clarity to my mind.”

“I should probably do some yoga.” You mused, staring off across the street at nothing in particular. “Could use some relaxation.”

“Maybe a massage would be better,” your mom grinned, “last time I tried yoga, I pulled a hamstring.”

“Well, you obviously weren’t doing it right.” Ella huffed, “It’s meant to center your mind, not hurt you.”

“Tell that to the high lunge.” She giggled. 

**

The dress shop was beautifully air conditioned. You could feel a bead of sweat sink into your bra and you grimaced. Ella looked like she’d walked straight into heaven, the lady at the door greeting the three of you with water bottles and a smile.

You took the proffered bottle from its tray, gulping half of it down before following after the woman in charge of your sisters dress alterations. She rambled on excitedly about the recent finishing touches to your dresses and you nodded as though you were listening, walking into the backroom where small changing rooms were draped in white curtains for privacy.

“Your dress is just over here.” She directed, showing Ella to the large bridal room and Ella followed after with a squeal of delight. Her dress was draped elegantly over the bodice of a mannequin that honestly did the lace no justice and you watched your sister flit like a bird around every side to inspect the work.

“Your beading is so exquisite, Darcy.” She cried warmly and the seamstress hummed happily.

“Let’s try it on, shall we?”

Ella nodded enthusiastically, dropping her (most likely expensive) purse unceremoniously on the floor and beginning to strip from her clothing. Darcy chuckled, closing the draping quickly so your sister could get ready in privacy.

Both your mother and yourself sat on a bench against the wall opposite and chatted softly while you waited; listening to the little gasps and squeaks of your sister as she was fastened into her gown.

“Oh, it’s beautiful!” She called over the top of the curtain and your mother shouted out her enthusiasm to see it.

Darcy pulled back the curtain and your mother gasped, running to meet your sister where she stood on a pedestal looking like a princess. “You look so beautiful!” She said, already teary eyed and you walked to meet them with a smile, rubbing the soft lace of your sister’s dress gently between the tips of your fingers.

“You look like a princess.” You agreed and Ella beamed.

“It’s perfect.” She sighed, twirling the skirt and eyeing herself in the mirror. “I feel like I’m living in a fairytale.”

“Let’s get you ladies in your dresses as well and see if we need to do anymore tune ups.” Darcy said and both you and your mother walked to your own dressing rooms to be helped into your dresses. Your dress was a lavender floor length with off the shoulder sleeves and it made you feel unreasonably beautiful.

“You look gorgeous.” Ella whispered and you turned to find her behind you, surveying the fabric of your dress. “If I didn’t know that Michael was so obsessed with me I’d be concerned.”

You chuckled, shaking your head at her. “Don’t be ridiculous. No one will even know I’m in the room if you’re there. You look gorgeous; Michael is gonna die.”

“Do you think it fits me well?” She murmured and you smiled, nodding.

“Like a glove.”

“Look at my girls.” Your mother crowed, walking towards you in a dress like your own. “You both look so beautiful.”

“We get it from our mom.” Ella teased and your mother laughed.

“And don’t you forget it!”

“How do your dresses feel?” Darcy asked, approaching your circle. “Any modifications?” She pinched at the fabric of your dress as she surveyed the fit and you allowed her to manhandle you.

“Actually, my dress feels like it fits perfectly, as long as I don’t gain any weight.” You smoothed your fingers down the silk idly.

Darcy moved on to the other two dresses, pinching and surveying as she went and you twisted in the mirror to see the back of the dress.

“You said you work later tonight, right?” Ella asked as she was led back to her own dressing room and you followed.

“Yeah, I work at 5pm. I’ll have to leave as soon as we’re done with this fitting.”

Darcy waved one of the other attendings over, “Can you assess her dress? She’s running on a time limit.”

The woman nodded, ushering you back to your own dressing room and you stood up on the little stool in the center so that she could go over the details of your dress one final time before the wedding.

“So you’ve got somewhere to be soon?” She asked casually, sitting down beside the end of your dress with a pin between her teeth.

“Ah, yeah, I’ve got work later. I’m an anesthesiologist at the hospital.”

“You must be very busy,” She hummed and you nodded, watching her work.

“Yeah, I mean, it can definitely get crazy sometimes. I guess we’ll see how everything goes tonight.” You mused.

“I’m rooting for you.” She smiled up at you.

**

It wasn’t very often that the hospital was still. It was eerie in its solitude. Empty hallways, the nurse’s station busy with conversation. You were back in the maternity ward this evening. Not many rooms were occupied tonight; no babies ready to be born. You had one caesarean scheduled in two hours and a whole lot of free time.

You could hear the cry of a baby in a room as you passed; disquietude with its currently mortal journey. “Bored?” One of the nurses called and you smiled with a nod, “Come chat.” She waved you over and you complied with ease.

“How are you, Jane?” You inquired softly. Jane was young, mid-twenties, and fresh with enthusiasm. Her hair was wild in its bun, like she’d thrown it up in a hurry, but she smiled bright and that comforted you.

“I’m great,” she beamed, twisting the engagement ring around her finger idly. “Josh and I just put an offer in on a house!”

“That’s amazing!” You smiled, leaning across the desk. “I wish I could afford a house, but my apartment will have to do for now.”

“Honestly, the only reason we could afford to do it is because Josh sold that app he was developing. Got 3 million for it. Crazy, right?”

“3 million?” You spluttered, “Oh my gosh, I wish I could develop an app.”

Jane laughed, “Me too, but I have no talent for that sort of thing.”

“Me neither.” You mused.

“So how have you been, Y/N? I heard about you and Jimin. I’m so sorry.”

Your heart seized at the mention of his name, but you mustered a smile; you knew she meant well. Jane didn’t have an unkind bone in her body.

“I’m OK,” you answered honestly, “work keeps me pretty distracted. It’s just gonna take some time to learn my new normal.”

“I’m sorry I brought it up,” Jane frowned, “That was thoughtless of me.”

“It’s OK,” you reassured, “I know you, Jane, you didn’t mean any harm.”

“Just because I meant well doesn’t mean it was right. I’m sorry. I wish I could ease the pain.”

“I wish you could too,” you chuckled, “You sure Josh is the one? Not me?”

Jane giggled, “That’s what my wrist says, anyway.” She tapped at her tattoo and you grinned.

“Dang. He’s a lucky guy.” You sighed deep. “Well, I’m gonna go sit in the break room for a bit and rest my feet.”

“Get yourself a snack, too!” She called and you waved a goodbye.

The breakroom was quiet when you entered, one resident sprawled prostrate across the couch as its only occupant. You made your way to the vending machine, peering into the spirals, chaining snacks in place. Nothing of real substance; but there were pretzels.

After retiring to the couch with your snack, you allowed the silence to wash over you. It still didn’t feel real that Jimin was no longer around. Even in a new apartment, his absence was like a nail in your heart. You wondered if you’d ever feel better. Ever feel normal again.

Maybe if Jungkook- no, there was no point in thinking that way. He’d made his decision, you just needed to let that go. You couldn’t hold on to someone you weren’t even sure wanted you back. It was just another kind of heartache you didn’t need right now.

Back in high school you could have never imagined this future. A future in which your enemy was your soulmate and you were the one that was sad that he didn’t want to try for…more. It was frustrating just how devastated that made you feel.

The crunch of your pretzels filled your head like a drum and you stared absentmindedly at the ceiling. You could hear the soft snores of the sleeping resident and you wished that you could be like him. So many people said eventually you’d be able to just tune it all out and fall asleep, but you preferred the comfort of a bed and a couch that gave you a crick in the neck would never do.

The door to the breakroom opened and Jungkook walked sluggishly inside. He hadn’t noticed you, fiddling with something in the pocket of his scrubs. He walked up to survey the vending machine and you took the opportunity to watch him.

He looked tired; the kind of worn you could only get from working 18 straight hours without rest. His shoulders sagged with his fatigue and his eyelids drooped. He settled on a bag of chips before turning and spotting you.

“Oh. I didn’t see you there,” he walked towards you, motioning to the spot beside you. “Do you mind if I-?”

You shook your head, motioning for him to sit down and he slumped into the seat with a puff of exhaustion. “Long day?”

“The longest.” He nodded, slowly opening his bag of chips and munching on the end of one as his vision blurred on the floor.

“How long have you been here?” You asked softly, hoping your voice wasn’t loud enough to wake the sleeping resident on the opposite couch.

Jungkook shrugged, eyes still trained on the tile floor. “Probably 16 hours, maybe longer. I’m honestly not sure what time it is.”

You glanced down at your watch, humming. “It’s 9pm.”

He was slouched, docile like a doll in the lumpy cushions of the couch beneath you and you smiled down at him. You remembered how exhausted you were when you very first started. You were still exhausted most of the time, but now it was like a film over a window pane that you’d become accustomed to.

“How long does the exhaustion last for?” He asked, looking over at you and you shrugged.

“Probably forever.” You mumbled and he frowned.

“Encouraging.”

You chuckled, staring right back. “Sorry. To be fair, the load does lessen and it’s easier to function like a human, but it takes time. We’ve all got to put in our grunt work; it makes you appreciate things more.”

“Life’s never easy.” He nodded, tracing the edges of his chip bag. “I definitely agree that timing is everything and sometimes if you have to wait for something for a long time and work really hard for it…it’s more worthwhile because you’ve earned it. You know?”

He turned to look at you and suddenly you felt like his question was more than just surface level. “What if you work for something and you never end up getting it?” You asked softly.  “You work so hard for so long and have these big dreams and it just…never materializes?”

“Then I suppose it wasn’t meant to be.”

“It seems like even destiny has become a liar at times.” You sighed, but you couldn’t look away from him.

Jungkook shook his head, “I think sometimes it just takes a little longer for fate to work its magic.”

“Maybe,” you mumble, watching as his eyes traced along the shape of your face, “Jungkook, I-”

Suddenly, someone is yawning loudly and you jumped, turning to see the resident you’d completely forgotten about sitting up, scrubbing at his face tiredly. Dr. Amari smiled over at you, grin lopsided and drooping with fatigue.

“Evening Dr. Y/N, Dr. Jeon. That power nap was exactly what I needed.” He groaned, adjusting himself on the coach so that he was no longer on his front before pulling the table beside him forward and rifling through pages he’d apparently left there before falling asleep.

Jungkook chuckled to himself softly before standing and adjusting his scrubs. “I should go. I only had a few minutes to rest anyway. I’ll see you around, Y/N.”

You nodded, mute, and watched as he left back out the door he’d come in. The room returned to its previous solitude and you sighed. It was going to be such a long night.

**

Next chapter is THE chapter so look forward to that!

Let me know what you think, my loves <3

Chapter 14

Chapter 16

Copyright © 2018 by Taeken-My-Heart. All rights reserved.

#jungkook scenario #jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #btsbookclub

[kiarcheo]

StepBother   

'I’d say that we have to thank Mary for the suggestion.’ ‘I’d rather die.’ The disgust on Kat’s face makes Cathy chuckle.

AKA

The one where Kat and Mary have an interesting relationship and Parrward get together.

A/N: Mary’s portrait in this fic is positive and totally ignores her doings as a queen but if it bothers you, you can skip to the Parrward part starting with Kat waiting at the cinema: Mary is mentioned but I think you can understand what is going on without having read the first part of the fic.

With that out of the way…I’m not sure exactly what this is or where it came from, but it started with 500 words of Mary&Kat banter (actually I know where that part came from, from Hidden Stories and their dynamic in the last chapter) and then ofc Parrward had to get involved and it got out of hand and now I have almost 4000 words??

This is 1/4 Mary&Kat and 3/4 Parrward, I guess. Also can read on Ao3 as usual.

When you’re a 16th-century queen living in the 21st century, things are bound to be confusing. From language to social conventions, the changes are endless, without even talking about the technological progress. Motion sensor technology, from bells ringing when you step into a shop to doors opening themselves, still catches them by surprise, especially when things start to move or turn off and on without any prompt.

Home is an oasis of familiarity and certainty, if they don’t dwell on why they and their children had been brought back, how, or even simpler questions like why they came back aged as they had. The order from older to younger goes: Catalina, Anna, Jane, Anne, Cathy, Kat. They had tried to figure it out, of course. Was it according to their original date of birth? No, because then Anne would have been the second oldest one. Was it according to their age when they died? No, because Jane would have been younger than Anne and Cathy. Their age at the time of their marriage to Henry? Catalina and Anna, at 24 and 25, had been the youngest besides Kat, so that made no sense either. The length of their reign? Pitiful as most of them had been, Cathy and Anne would have followed Catalina. The kids at least had come back in the order of their birth: Mary is still the oldest, followed by Elizabeth, Edward, and then toddler Mae. Everyone came back younger, with the notable exceptions of Katherine and Mae who returned at the same age they were when they died. Perhaps it was possible to make them younger but not older than they had ever been in their first lives?

Just small questions to ignore, right? But once they decided that their return was the work of an inscrutable higher power and they learnt how to use modern appliances, with their shared past, knowledge and experiences, home became an oasis of familiarity and certainty in a new, confusing world.

Except for one thing. Which was actually one of most baffling matters the queens had encountered… and that they kept seeing, right in the house they shared: the relationship between Katherine Howard and Mary Tudor.

According to history books, that should have been Katherine’s most fraught relationship: unlike the first three queens, she didn’t have any issue with her predecessors or successor, Elizabeth and Edward had fond memories of her, and she had never even met little Mae. And if age had been a sore point between them – for Mary at least, who had been displeased at her father marrying someone several years younger than herself – them returning pretty much at the same age, seemed a recipe for disaster.

With time, most animosity among the queens had been squelched and scores had been settled, and the idea of them all living together had been put forward. It took a while, but they finally managed to find a suitable house to everyone’s liking. Still, being cordial during an occasional meeting was different than living together. So the queens had expected, if not explosive confrontations, at least tense interactions between the youngest queen and the oldest ‘kid’. But they never came. Instead, as they all moved in together, they were witnesses to a dynamic that they struggled to fully understand, but that seemed to work well for the two girls.

****

‘I think we can all agree-’

‘That I’m the ten among you threes?’ Kat interrupts her.

Mary glares at her. ‘That my father was an asshole.’

‘That too.’

Catherine raises an eyebrow at what she hears as she enters the room. ‘What are you talking about?’

‘I didn’t really mean that, you know.’

‘Just curious. Trust me, not going to defend him.’ Nobody in their house would, and she thought Kat would know it.

‘No, I mean, you’re not a three. You’re totally a ten too.’

Catalina chuckles. ‘Aren’t you charming today?’

****

‘You’re lucky you got your mom’s looks.’

Cathy wonders if they realise she is the kitchen and if she should make her presence known. She doesn’t particularly wish to witness their flirting either.

‘Actually, my father was quite handsome in his youth.’

‘Wouldn’t know, he was like thrice my age and twice my size when I met him.’

‘Same.’ It slips out. Not really. She had been 31 when they got married and he had been twenty years her senior.  But Cathy understands the sentiment.

Mary looks from Kat to Cathy, apparently not at all put out by her overhearing them. ‘Fair enough.’

****

‘No offence to Anne but divorcing your mother should have been a sign that something was wrong with him.’

Hearing her name, Anne starts to pay attention as Kat continues. ‘I would have never done it.’

‘What?’ Mary echoes Anne’s thoughts.

‘If I had been married to Catalina, I would have never divorced her. RIP Henry but I’m different.’

‘I don’t know what’s more disturbing. That you find my mom attractive or that you would have been my stepmother.’

Kat chuckles. ‘I am your stepmother.’

‘Stepbother, that’s what you are.’

****

‘Ehi, Mary, do you call your mom mami?’

‘No?’

‘Can I?’

Mary gives a saccharine smile to Jane, who is looking between her and Kat confused. ‘Jane, we’re going to need one less seat at the table today. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some murdering to do.’

***

‘Mary, Mary,’ Anna is ready to point out to Kat that there is no way Mary can hear her calling if she is whispering her name like that, when Kat yells. ‘MARY!’

‘You bellowed?

‘See? Call three times and she will appear; you don’t even need a mirror.’

‘I’m going to kill you.’

‘Not really helping your case.’

Anna chuckles. She doesn’t understand their relationship, but it certainly makes for some entertaining times.

***

The queens are in the living room when they hear the front door opening and the distinctive voices of Mary and Kat getting closer.

‘I said that objectively speaking.’

‘And then I’m going to tell her that you objectively think she is hot.’

‘Don’t you dare.’

‘Don’t be ashamed, Mary!’ Kat enters the living room, eyes on her phone. ‘Embrace the gay!’

She gets the wind knocked out of her by an unexpected hug. ‘What?’ Mary squeezes her more. ‘I’m doing as you said.’

‘Kat, are you gay?’

Everyone stops at Jane’s question.

‘Am I gay?’ Kat laughs. ‘I’m ecstatic!’

Mary can’t help to notice that Cathy is the only one chuckling at Kat’s quote.

 So. Yes. If asked about Kat and Mary’s relationship, the consensus is that they seem to live to bother each other. Mary lording being older over Kat and Kat constantly reminding Mary that she was and still is her stepmother as her marriage to Henry had never been annulled. Mary threatening bodily harm and Kat mentioning how much she likes Catalina. It’s just harmless flirting and Catalina finds it amusing as much as Mary finds it annoying. She knows perfectly well that Kat hits on her mom just to rile her up…and it works every single time.

 ‘You know, for once, you could actually focus your attention on the Catherine you actually like…’ Mary says once her mother leaves the room, eyes not leaving the sketchbook on her lap.

‘What? I do like your mom. I don’t know what you mean.’

‘Sure you don’t.’ Mary rolls her eyes. ‘You should have been Catherine with a C.’

‘What? Why?’ Kat asks genuinely confused.

‘Then your name would have fit you better.’  She raises the sketchbook to show it to her. A blank page with a single word in capital letters: C(h)oward. ‘Since you’re a coward.’

 Yet, for two people who loudly proclaim all the time that they cannot stand each other and whose contact name for the other is ‘stepbother’ (Mary claiming Kat had stolen it from her but it made no sense, Kat retorting that daughter and bother sound similar enough to make sense), they sure spend a lot of time together of their own volition.

That’s how Kat finds herself waiting outside the cinema for Mary. Who is late. Despite being the one who had wanted to see the movie – Kat still doesn’t know which one, but her and Mary have a similar enough taste that she usually trusts her choices – and had organised the outing. She looks at her phone again to check if Mary had replied to her text. Nothing. She doesn’t know why she even bothered to try since the phone didn’t buzz. She is slipping it back in her pocket when the awaited sound stops her. She opens the chat: Mary sent her the code of her ticket, telling her to start heading in. Seeing no reason for both to risk missing the movie, she does, but not before writing back that Mary better get some snacks when she arrives to make up for her lateness.  

She easily finds her assigned seat. She sits down and looks at the ticket stub again to double check. Portrait of a lady on fire. She contemplates whether looking it up online. She has never heard of it, but the way the girl at the till had smiled at her while handing her the ticket made her feel like she is missing something.

‘Look who decided to show u-’ she greets the person who just sat down next to her. ‘Cathy?’

‘Kat? Hi!’ Cathy sounds as surprised as she is to see her there. ‘I didn’t know Mary had invited you too.’

‘Mary?’

‘Yeah, she told me to go ahead and get in without waiting for her. Why?’

Kat shakes her head lightly. ‘She told me the same.’ She takes her phone out, quickly opening their chat. Her fingers hover over the screen. Should she stick with the evergreen ‘I’m going to kill you’ (she should really make a shortcut for it) or be more creative and get into details of how she is going to make her pay?

‘I feel slightly out of place.’

Kat looks at Cathy, who just juts her chin and tilts her head slightly. ‘Take a look around yourself.’ She adds very quietly.

Lots of small groups of elderly women. Or elderly couples. Kat doesn’t turn around to check the rows behind her, but from what she can see they are the youngest people in the room. Perhaps that’s the usual audience for a mid-week afternoon show?

‘It’s so nice to see some new faces!’ Apparently they are not the only ones who took notice. A lady is smiling at them, holding out a pamphlet. ‘In case you’re interested in more.’

Cathy takes it, thanking her. It’s a list of foreign movies with the details of the screenings.

‘How is your French?’

Kat takes a moment to think about it. ‘Rusty?’

She has never been as good as Anne, for obvious reasons. They had retained their language skills from the past which left her (and Jane) at disadvantage compared to the others. With five languages each, Cathy and Catalina are the polyglot queens, with the three older kids on par with them. It is actually a point of pride for the queens. They might be lacking some common general knowledge, but their household can speak English, French, German, Spanish, Italian and Greek, even if some slightly antiquate forms of them at times.

Kat knows that she will never be the most well-versed in languages in their group, but it doesn’t mean she is not going to take advantage of her multi-lingual family and learn as much as she can. But lately she might have been neglecting French a bit to focus on learning Spanish. Admittedly it had started as a way to annoy Mary by talking with Catalina in what Mary considered ‘their own private language’, despite most people at the house speaking it. But then it became the gateway for a better relationship with the first queen, replacing the cordial but distant one they had before.

Anne and Jane were family and family had been everything in the past, despite how crappy she had been treated by her own blood. She still values it above most things, so it gave her an instant connection to them, despite past experiences…or perhaps thanks to them. Surprise, surprise, their extended family had not been much nicer to her cousins than they had been to her, so there was bonding over terrible families. Anna was a friendly face from the past and they almost seamlessly picked up from where they had left. And Cathy…they had an immediate and quick connection. At first it was because they were the youngest queens in this new life and also the ones who could relate the most to each other about their past one. They had to put up with the same Henry. Anna’s married experience had been short before moving onto a cordial if not friendly relationship as the ‘King’s sister’ (and besides, Kat knew she still harboured guilty feelings about her divorce opening the way for Kat’s marriage and consequent death, so she tried to avoid the topic). Jane had supposedly been ‘the only one he truly loved’. And Catalina and Anne had known a younger Henry who was, apparently, quite a different man from the one the last two queens had been saddled with.

All in all, Catalina had been the queen Kat had struggled the most to connect with, and learning Spanish helped. But not in this occasion, with a French movie about to start.

‘It should have subtitles, right?’

 The credits end. The lights come up. They remain seated. Most of the audience does, almost if shell-shocked by the movie that just ended. Cathy nudges Kat’s elbow lightly, offering a tissue. Usually Kat would make a joke about her being such a mom (she has taken care of Mae enough to know that you can never be overprepared with a toddler), but she wordlessly accepts it. They both dry their eyes.

‘I think,’ Kat croaks out, ‘this is the best movie I’ve ever seen.’

She is not an expert cinephile, it goes without saying; none of them are. But they did look for lists of iconic movies and watched them. While their usual excuse of having grown up without a tv works relatively well when they need to explain their lack of pop culture knowledge, nobody likes to feel always left out. They still have movie family nights, usually with a ‘must-watch’ title, but by now everyone just watches what they like. In Kat’s case, she tends to stick to ‘light’ movies. She doesn’t care if it’s fantasy, comedy, action, animated…she just doesn’t want to be scared or cry too much. But sometimes the crying is worth it.

‘Yeah.’ Cathy agrees. It seems like she has been left speechless too.

Both lost in their thoughts, no words are exchanged until they are out of the cinema.

‘Want to go and eat something?’

‘What about Mae?’

Cathy smiles at Kat’s thoughtfulness. ‘Everyone but us is home.’ Perks of living all together. Built-in babysitter service basically 24/7 in case of need. ‘And Jane said that even if the others go out, she will stay.’

As they sit at a Chinese restaurant nearby, the conversation returns to the movie.

‘I mean, I wished the ending was different, you know? Happy. With them together. But…the more I think, the more I understand it, I think.’ Kat says, twirling her noodles with her fork, using chopsticks a skill she has yet to master properly. ‘I get it. Marriage being unescapable. Men intruding in women’s spaces and lives ruining everything…’

‘Oh?’

‘Not like that.’ She realises what Cathy thought she was implying. ‘Just…the happiest period of my life had been the first months as Anna’s maid of honour. Just being around her and the other ladies. And then of course Henry had to ruin everything…’ Kat shakes her head as to dispel the thought. ‘What about you?’

‘I think I still need sometime to fully process the movie. But I’d say that we have to thank Mary for the suggestion.’

‘I’d rather die.’ The disgust on Kat’s face makes Cathy chuckle. ‘How did that happen, anyway?’ She has never seen Mary and Cathy spend any significant amount of time together.

‘She texted me, something about wanting to taste,’ Kat starts choking, ‘which I assume was meant to be test, the waters. We’re not as close as the others, so I thought spending time together could be good…You okay?’

Kat, still coughing, waves her concern away. ‘Just a bit too spicy.’

‘Yeah, you look flushed.’

‘I’ll pop to the loo and splash some water on my face,’ she rasps out, standing up.

Cathy follows her with her eyes, making sure that she is okay, until she disappears behind the toilet door. Then she grabs the menu, wanting to check the desserts. Her eyes fall onto the noodles section and…Kat’s dish has no red chili pepper next to it.

A vibration distracts her from her thoughts. She immediately checks her phone in case the call is about Mae, before realising it comes from Kat’s phone, ‘Stepbother’ flashing on the screen. The vibrating stops. Then starts again, this time shorter ones. Instinctively she looks at it.

A notification pops up.

* Don’t be a K(h)oward like usual *

Others follow in quick succession.

* Tell her *

* You’re not going to like the next step of my plan *

* I will get you two together *

* So you stop hitting on my mom *

* Not because I want you to be happy *

* Ofc *

 ‘So…going back to Mary,’ Cathy starts once Kat is back. ‘Do you think she did it on purpose?’

Kat looks intently at the menu, shrugging.

‘Because that would be…going to some length.’ She continues. ‘Organising. Getting two separate tickets but for seats next to each other. Paying for them…Any idea why?’

Kat sighs. ‘Any chance you’re letting this go?’

‘Any chance Mary is going to let this go?’

Kat puts her elbows on the table, closed fists against her forehead. A groan is all Cathy gets.

‘I’m sure it’s not that bad.’

Kat rubs her eyes in frustration. Cathy is starting to think she won’t get a reply when the younger girl straightens up in her chair.

She takes a visibly deep breath and rushes out ‘She has been pushing me to ask you out for…’ she hesitates, ‘some time.’

‘How long if she had decided to take matters in her hands?’ She is teasing but also genuinely curious.

‘Not like she is known for her patience.’ Kat grumbles. Looking at Cathy she can see that she is not convinced, but she is thankful that she seems to let it go. And smiling. ‘You’re not upset?’

‘Why don’t we continue this outside?’ Cathy nods towards the exit. ‘But no,’ she adds before Kat could misinterpret it. ‘I’m not upset.’

As they go towards the till to pay, Cathy tries to order her thoughts. That was not what she had been expecting from today. Kat was interested in her. It’s not like she had never thought about it. They get along very well. Besides her godmother, Kat is the queen she feels the closest too. She is great with Mae. And she is undeniably beautiful.  

‘What are thinking?’

Cathy has not even realised they had left the restaurant. ‘Wait! I didn’t pay!’ She makes to go back inside but Kat grabs her arm.

‘I took care of it.’ Kat shrugs. ‘You were clearly out of it and it’s my fault.’ She jams her hands in her pockets, eyes downcast.

‘None of that,’ she bumps against her hip, trying to get a smile. ‘I was just surprised.’

Kat peeks at her, cautiously hopeful.  

‘I didn’t think you liked me. As more than a friend.’ Cathy specifies before Kat can say anything in that regard. ‘Well, maybe sometimes? But I sort of convinced myself that it was wishful thinking.’

Kat stops walking at that. ‘What?’ She hurries to catch up with Cathy.

‘I thought you and Mary…’

‘Eww. She is like…was going to say sister but that would make it really weird to hit on her mom.’

‘That’s the other thing.’

‘You didn’t really think I fancied Catalina, did you? I mean, she is a beautiful woman, but it has always been about annoying Mary.’

‘I really don’t get your relationship.’

Kat just shrugs. She is used to hearing that.

‘Hey! I know you!’ a loud voice interrupts them. ‘This a step-daughter too?’ The man takes a step closer to Kat.

Cathy doesn’t know what possesses her, but she puts her arm around Kat’s waist. ‘Actually I’m her girlfriend and we’re on a date.’

‘Is that so?’ The man looks between them.

‘Yes.’ Kat puts her arm around Cathy’s shoulder and Cathy snuggles into her side.

‘Freaks.’

‘What?’ Cathy tries to take step forward.

‘Don’t.’ Kat grasps her closer to her, keeping her still as the man walks away. ‘It’s not that.’

‘Then what was that?’ It clearly looked like that to Cathy.

‘So…sometimes when me and Mary are out, guys hit on us. Best way to shake them off? Even better than saying we’re girlfriends, since some dudes takes it as an invitation to ask for a threesome? Saying that I’m her stepmother. It tends to weird them out or at least throw them off long enough that we can get away.’

Cathy thinks about it. Mary and Kat are quite close in age and they look like it, so she can see what it would surprise people. ‘Wait…did he think…’

‘That you are Mary’s mom? That or that we’re in some role-play stuff, I guess. That’s why I stopped you from trying to beat him up.’ Kat chuckles at the idea of Cathy, who is even shorter than her, although not by much, squaring up with that guy. ‘It was not because of the gay thing. Also from the smell, he was not exactly sober. I didn’t want you to get hurt.’

‘Awww.’ Cathy coos softly. ‘Still can’t believe you and Mary do that.’

‘Don’t say it like that. You make it sound like something weird.’ Kat steps away, dropping her arm from around Cathy’s shoulder. They both immediately regret the move. ‘Besides it’s the truth. I didn’t lie.’

‘Wouldn’t want to make a liar out of you now, then.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Maybe we could make this a real date? We went to movie. We had dinner…’

‘Yes!’ Kat shouts enthusiastically. ‘Wait! No!’

‘What??’

‘We’re not going to have a first date organised by Mary.’ Cathy relaxes at Kat’s explanation. ‘She’s going to be unsufferable. What about tomorrow? Oh, wait. Creative writing class. Uhm…when do you prefer? I’m sure we could find someone to look after Mae.’

‘What about Wednesday?’

‘Oh, Pasta day at The Tucan! If you’d like it, I mean.’

‘It’s a date.’

They stare at each other smiling until a couple of tipsy girls walk into them.

‘Home?’

‘Yeah.’

They walk side by side, hands brushing against each other. Kat glances down after her hand knocks against Cathy’s harder than usual. ‘Can I…’ she extends her fingers, now lightly tickling the back of Cathy’s hand.

Cathy turns her hand over and takes Kat’s without saying a word. As they keep walking, she twists her hand a bit and entwines their fingers.

‘What?’ Cathy asks with a smile after hearing Kat giggling.

‘It’s just unreal.’ Kat looks at her, beaming with a giddy expression plastered on her face.

‘What? That we watched a breath-taking movie, had dinner together, agreed on a date and we’re now going back home together and all because we were set up by our shared stepdaughter?’

‘I was more thinking about holding your hand and you liking me back, but that too.’

#parrward #kat and mary #don't ask me why #six the musical #six the musical fanfiction #six fic #howard x parr #parr x howard #six mary #six katherine howard #six cathy parr #mywork #six writing #six the musical fic #six fanfiction #my six posts #my ideas #six catherine parr #six fanfic #six the musical fanfic #my posts #six mary tudor

[disneydeb1928]

One Piece Theories: The Truth of the D. Clan

                                                       - The Void Century Theories, Part 3

This is the third part of my Void Century Theories Series. This one is a long one (I apologize).

The D. Clan

So, first I think we should review, what exactly has been mentioned, in canon, on this topic:

1) It is first brought up by Kureha, on Drum Island, when she revealed that the true name of the late Pirate King was “Gol D. Roger” and told Dolton that Chopper had joined up with a very “dangerous man” (Ch. 154)

After stating Chopper has joined up with a “dangerous man”, she then smiles and says, “D’s will is still alive?”

2) In chapter 594, which takes place after Marineford, the Gorosei are discussing the possible connection between Rayleigh and Luffy when one of them says, “The ‘D.’s are always the troublemakers… especially Portgas… it seems his name has been a little too visible lately.”

3) Law actually talks about the D. Clan twice. The first time, is right before the timeskip, in chapter 729. After leaving Amazon Lily with Luffy in Rayleigh’s care he says “Still, I wonder what the Dark King’s [Rayleigh] is up to… the ‘D.’ will always bring a storm without fail… heheh…”. Later, during the Dressrosa arc, Doflamingo questions Law about why he would trust the Straw Hat Pirates as much as he does.  Law replies “Because I know the ‘D.’ will blow up a storm again!”. However, both of these statements are merely echoing what Rosinante told him as a child.

Rosinante refers to where “I come from”, which must be referring to Mary Goise, the home of the Celestial Dragons. He says that will someone “with the name of ‘D.’ begins to make a name for themselves in the world… all the elders all groan and mutter… that ‘D.’ will surely bring with them another storm…”. We know that this is true based off the comments the Gorosei made (see above). He also says that it is a name that people have “secretly” been inheriting throughout history. This is highlighted by the fact that, just a chapter prior, when Law revealed his true name to Baby 5, he said “the ‘D.’ is a secret’ (Ch. 763). Rosinante then states that, in Mary Goise, the “’Family of D.’” is know as “God’s Natural Enemy”. Of course, many have taken this to mean ‘the Celestial Dragons natural enemy’ since the Celestial Dragons see themselves as gods.

When Law demands to know if that makes him a monster, Rosinante admits that “no one knows the actual truth”. However, we know that’s not true. This sentence is important because of a connection it has to the conversation between Law and Sengoku in Episode 743. Sengoku says,

“At least, I know Rosinante had no idea [about the meaning of that ‘D’]. So that wasn’t the reason he saved you.”

While it was a beautiful moment, it should be noted that Sengoku seems to be implying that had Rosinante have known about the true meaning behind the ‘D.’, it might have played a role in why he saved Law (even though we all know Rosinante was a big softy). Sengoku almost seems relieved to hear Rosinante didn’t know the truth. Then, he thinks,

“So he is one, too. The people with the name “D.” always lead a checkered life.”

The dictionary defines ‘checkered’ as: marked by periods of varied fortune or discreditable incidents. It at least implies that Sengoku knows something about the D. Clan.

Now, let’s review the people who appear to know something about the ‘D.’ (at least part of it) and the implications that could have:

1.) Dr. Kureha – (See Explanation Above)

Implications: Kureha aas born on September 8th, 1383. To put this into perspective, that makes her older than every known ‘D.’-bearer we’ve been introduced to in the story so far. In fact, that makes her 141 years old. As mentioned before, she is one of the people who knows Gold Roger’s real name. We know that Roger began to complain about the papers calling him that when he met with Whitebeard (around August) in 1500, so it is very plausible that she simply remembers what he used to be called before the propaganda began. However, her last comment, “D’s will is still alive?” is something of interest.

Grammatically, structuring the sentence as “D’s will” would give the same meaning as “Will of D.”. Both are describing a possessive condition. So we know that she is specifically referring to the Will of D. in this sentence. When she says this, she is smiling, implying that she is pleased with this fact. My question is, why would she have reason to believe that it wasn’t alive. I understand that some families with the ‘D.’ in their name have gone about hiding it, but there is still Monkey D. Garp, who is very public with his name. It’s possible that she’s been living a secluded life for a long time, but if she knew about Roger how had she not known of Garp? Also, I would stipulate, that her reaction makes me believe that there is an emotional connection to the “Will of D.”. It is absolutely possible, that her sentiment could more general, in that she’s happy to see that the World Government wasn’t able to extinguish another token of the past. Or it could imply something else. I think a lot of people wouldn’t be surprised if Kureha had met Roger in the past. He was a sick man and she was a genius doctor, capable of amazing advances in medicine. I think it is also possible that she knew others bearing that initial.  

2.) Roger and some of the Roger Pirates – (As mentioned during my discussion on Joy Boy’s treasure, they discovered the true meaning at Laugh Tale)

Implications: While Roger appeared put out by the idea that the newspaper was covering up his name, he didn’t seem too beat up about it. In fact, we honestly can’t garner much from Roger’s reactions to anything. He, much like Luffy, didn’t seem to let things bother him.

However, I would like to take a look at his last words before his execution. There are two main versions I have seen floating around, but I am sure, due to translations, that there are many more. They are:

·         “Inherited will, the swelling of the changing times, and the dreams of people. These are things that cannot be stopped. As long as people seek the answer to freedom, these will never cease to be!”

·         “Inherited Will, The Destiny of the Age, The Dreams of its People. As long as people continue to pursue the meaning of Freedom, these things will never cease!”

Of course, the first person who springs to mind when I read this, is Luffy, who talks about freedom being a large reason in why he wanted to become a pirate. What I believe Roger is saying, is that as long as people are not content with oppression, and instead chose freedom (which can taken many forms), then people’s dreams and will (Joy Boy’s, Roger’s, Ace’s) can never fully be extinguished (which parallels to what Whitebeard said during Marineford).

Now, freedom mean many things, to different people. Luffy sees freedom as becoming a pirate; Zoro sees it as becoming the world’s greatest swordsman; Koby sees it as becoming a Marine. If you notice, despite having a dislike at the idea of becoming a Marine, Luffy never does anything but encourage Koby (in his own way). Because ‘freedom’ in this sense, is more about following your ambitions – your heart’s desires – reaching for the stars.  

3.) Whitebeard – Roger informs Whitebeard the true meaning of the “D.” during their last meeting before turning himself in. In fact, Whitebeard has enough understanding on the subject that he can confidently say that Blackbeard is not the man that Roger is waiting for [to find the One Piece]

Implications: After Roger complains about his name change, WB asked him this,

“Now and then I come across some people with the name “D.”. Even in my own crew, there’s Teach. Just what is ‘D.’?”

So, Whitebeard is admitting that “now and then” he comes across ‘D.’-bearers. He doesn’t specify how often or even how many bearers he’s come across during his time (at this point WB is 50). However, we know that by 1500, the only ‘D.’-bearers that we know (currently) existed were:

·         Jaguar D. Saul (born March 6, 1397)

·         Monkey D. Garp (born May 2, 1446)

·         Rocks D. Xebec

·         Gol D. Roger (born December 31, 1447)

·         Monkey D. Dragon (born 1469)

·         Portrgas D. Rouge

·         Marshall D. Teach (born August 3, 1484)

We know that Whitebeard was a part of a infamous pirate crew known as the Rocks Pirates and that his captain, Rocks D. Xebec was a ‘D.’-bearer. Now, we have no idea what went down during the crew before they separated – or even when they separated. We don’t even know if the entire crew participated in the God’s Valley Incident. But what we do know, is that the Rocks Pirates were involved in a lot of the taboo subjects of the world. I go into this a lot deeper in one of my previous theories specifically on the Rocks Pirates, but it is very telling that two of the previous crew members end up with a Road Poneglyph. We also know that he is including Roger in his statement, but I also think it is likely he knows Garp as well. I think it is obvious that we have not discovered all of the current or past ‘D.’-bearers, so all we can do, beyond this list, is speculate.

Whatever it was that Roger ended up telling him, Whitebeard appears to keep to himself for the next 24 years. Not that I’m surprised, that man really didn’t care about pursuing any power other then keeping his family safe. However, at Marineford, he says,

“It’s not you [Blackbeard]… The man Roger is waiting for… is definitely not you, Teach. There are those who inherited Roger’s will… and one day, someone will appear who will inherit Ace’s will… As long as that ‘bloodline’ survives, their flames will never die… that will has been passed down from long ago…!!!”

4.) The Marines – They seem to have some awareness of the significance – or at least Sengoku does (as shown by his conversation with Law during episode 743)

5.) Doflamingo – After Law makes the comment about blowing the D. clan being able to blow up a “storm”, Doffy becomes enraged. This sees to indicate that he knows what Law is referencing. This wouldn’t be surprising since he knows the truth about the Treasure in Mary Geoise.

Implications: However, it could simply be that he, much like his brother, was reacting to the fear that the Celestial Dragons instilled in their children about the ‘D.’ clan and was angry that Law knew.

6.) Im-Sama – I think it is clear that if anyone in this story holds all the answers, it’s Im-Sama. They are clearly deeply rooted in the one piece mythology

7.) The Gorosei – Being second to Im-Sama and who the rest of the world view as the most powerful group in the world, it can be concluded that they, at least, know what Im wants them to know on the subject

Commonalities Between “D.”-bearers: All of the members who have passed, have all died with a smile on their face, in what appears to be, acceptance of their fate. This is, of course, with the exception of Teach, who feared death during Marineford.

#My OP Theories #one piece #one piece theories #one piece theory #op theories #op theory #the d. clan #trafalgar law #gol d. roger #monkey d. luffy #monkey d. garp #monkey d. dragon #sengoku #marineford #whitebeard #marshall d. teach #blackbeard #one piece 154 #op 154 #one piece 594 #op 594 #one piece 729 #op 729 #one piece 763 #op 763 #one piece 764 #op 764 #op episode 743

[scribbles97]

Left Behind - Chapter 32

PART 1 / PART 2

Chapter 22 / Chapter 23 / Chapter 24 / Chapter 25 / Chapter 26 / Chapter 27 / Chapter 28 / Chapter 29/ Chapter 30��/ Chapter 31

It hadn’t been Val’s plan to go the the simulator quite so soon after they had gotten home, but John had said something about familliarising himself with Thunderbird Three and Alan had been on the edge of another teenage temper tantrum. It had seemed like the easiest compromise to diffuse the situation. 

 When she had heard Thunderbird Two launch, both had looked at each other, concern on both their faces. A quick call upstairs had confirmed the launch to rescue a father and son trapped aboard an out of control hot air balloon. John seemed to have taken control of the situation, claiming his mother’s desk to work from whilst Scott had hovered over his shoulder. 

 Val had left the pair to it, trusting both to support each other and hoping they would manage to find their feet quickly whilst on the clock. John had been right, they did need a full time qualified pilot for Thunderbird Three, and when she had looked into it his stats from both NASA and the simulators placed him as the best man for the job. 

 Except, perhaps, his younger brother. 

As a challenge she had thrown up the live feed from Little Lightning, Beta Team had launched just as they had arrived home with Lucy. A TV satellite knocked out of orbit and into the path of another orbiting station needed realigning. Alan had taken it in his stride, reacting exactly as the other team had done, talking through his actions and glancing up to her for reassurance. 

 The kid was still just a teenager though, not even old enough to drive or vote. Lucy had made it clear, he had to do it the same way as his brothers, specialist training at the academy. He wouldn’t be allowed near an actual Thunderbird for another five years. 

 Not that Val could see him waiting patiently. 

 “What’s your closing distance?” She prompted, hovering at his shoulder, the first time he was flying without someone as Copilot to assist his actions. 

 “Thirty meters.” He responded with only the briefest of pauses, “Rotational vector still matched. Twenty meters… Ten.”

 The simulator jolted as the grappling arms engaged, lights above Alan’s head turning green to indicate a secure lock. 

 “Confirm successful lock?” 

 He nodded. 

 “Verbally.” She prompted again, “Remember your black box can’t see what you’re doing.”

 “Lock to satellite successful.” Alan confirmed, “Firing thrusters to counter spin.”

 She kept watching as her phone buzzed in her pocket, making Alan look up with a grin, 

 “I didn’t think there was any signal in space?”

 Laughing, she shook her head at him, “You watch your flying,” Glancing to the caller ID she frowned slightly, “Take her for a spin, but don’t crash whilst I’m EVA.”

 Alan sat straighter, eyes wide as she turned away and left him to it, stepping out of the simulator before she answered the call.

 “Casey.”

 “Val, it’s Ridley.”

 She had known the from the caller ID, what she didn’t know was why she was receiving the call. 

 “Not that it isn’t nice to hear from you Ridley,” She smiled perching on the steps up to the simulator, “But I would have thought you’d call John.”

 Ridley tutted softly, “I didn’t want to stick an idea in his head before I’d okayed it with someone higher up.”

 Val hummed and tilted her head to herself slightly, “Scott would be the one to speak to in that case.”

 “Scott won’t like what I have to say.”

 Val couldn’t help but snort as she looked down from the training balcony to the rest of the hangar where Thunderbird One sat, belly open and guts spilled out across the floor. 

 “So you want me to tell him to listen?” She asked, shifting to stand so she could watch Hiram and his pet robot as they organised the mess of wires trailing from the ship. 

 “The parts have arrived here for Thunderbird Five’s retrofit. I know the focus is on Lucy right now, but from what John and I have read and understood, this retrofit is our best chance at finding out if Jeff is out there.”

 Val sighed, they had all read the update Kyrano had provided them with to ensure everyone was on the same page regarding Gaat, the Mechanic, and Jeff. How much he had downplayed Lucy’s desperation, Val wasn’t sure. On reflection, it explained a lot though. Lucy had been antsy for weeks, constantly chasing an order for parts and making a point of reminding them that Five was due an upgrade. 

 An upgrade she had insisted on completing. 

 “John said the upgrades were based on a program he wrote, he probably has a better idea than anyone on what needs to be done up there.”

 With the explanation, the problem became clear. 

 “Scott still isn’t convinced John should be on the team.” She sighed, “I am working on persuading him.”

 “As is John,” Ridley murmured, “I don’t understand why Scott won’t let him up there immediately. This is their father we’re talking about.”

 Val knew the exact problem, but she knew she couldn’t voice it to Ridley. 

 Whether it was fate or convenience, she would never know, but it was right at that moment that Scott walked across the hangar floor to talk to Hiram. 

 Dropping her voice, Val turned back to the simulator, “Make plans for John and yourself to go up to Five for a week. I’ll speak to Scott.”

 The smile was clear in her voice even across the line, “F.A.B. Val.”

 “Scott!” She called across the cavern as she leant over the raillings of the balcony, “Get up here.”

 The frown he shot at her was visible even at the distance, making Val roll her eyes. The young man took more after his father than he realised, the furrowed brows and deep lines that cut into his forehead when something bothered him. Like his father, Scott would never admit it, not openly at least. 

 She was still leaning on the railing when Scott approached her from behind, his frown deeper again as he stood next to her.

 “What is it?”

 She kept her focus on thunderbird One as she spoke, “That parts have come in to upgrade Five.”

 His swallow was visible as he turned and leant on the railing alongside her, hands clasped together in a single fist as he took a long slow breath and let it out. 

 “I’m not sure that should be a priority right now.” He uttered, “We haven’t exactly the man power.”

 “We could spare John and Ridley.”

 “No.”

 The statement was quiet but firm. Scott had a decision made and it wasn’t going to be easy to make him change. 

 “Your father could be out there Scott.”

 His head dipped, eyes screwed shut as his forearms tensed. The dimples in his cheeks deepened as he pressed his lips together, shaking his head. 

 “I know.” He whispered, “I knew all along alright? But she told me not to get involved! To worry about keeping my team safe.”

 “Scott,” She started, watching him carefully, able to feel the hurt and anger radiating from him. 

 “No. Listen Aunt Val.” He snapped, blue eyes snapping open and piercing her, “Mom is down there in a coma because she made a rash decision. For once in her life she made a decision based on how she felt and what she wanted, and it damn near killed her.”

 She wanted to cut in, break him off and make him see that it wasn’t the case. The floodgates had opened though and she would have been fighting against the tide. 

 “It was my rash decisions that made her tell me to not get involved.” His voice dropped again, the rush of the flood gone as quickly as it had come, reduced to a trickle. 

 “I can’t trust myself to make a decision on this. Not when we almost lost Mom. Not when it could mean losing someone else.”

 It was as Val had expected, a man with the weight of his family’s safety on his shoulders and a fear that he wasn’t the right person to protect them. Except he was forgetting just how that fear helped him. 

 “Don’t you think,” She murmured, reaching out to touch his arm, “That being afraid will make you more cautious? That it could remind you to stop and think before you sent your brothers out there, or did something yourself?”

 He nodded with a sigh, “Yeah. It does. I was going to go with Virgil before John sent him on his own. I thought it would be safer than using the autopilot and wrist controls.”

 His point was right, and she made a mental note to bring it up with John later. 

 “Good,” She nodded, “So what’s the danger with sending John and Ridley to Five for a week?”

 Scott snorted, shaking his head again, “Space.” 

 It sounded like the single word was meant to answer her question. Scott must have seen the confusion on her face though as he continued. 

 “Space is the worst, it only takes one tiny thing to go wrong for everything to go wrong. And when it goes wrong, it goes wrong in a big way. Do you know how many space calls IR gets that we physically can’t respond to fast enough?”

 “What if there was a way to respond faster?”

 Val turned, wary of the voice of her second nephew at such a vulnerable moment for Scott. Not that she needed have worries, John was a master of managing his older brother and apparently knew that approaching too close at that moment was a bad idea.

 “Rids and I would watch each others backs. Plus if we were up there semi permenantly, we could respond to those calls that  would take too long otherwise.” 

 It didn’t seem to phase him that Scott hadn’t turned to look at him. From where she stood, Val could see that the oldest didn’t want to be listening to John. That he hadn’t simply walked away from the conversation was definitely promising. 

 “Dispatch are getting more calls by the day, too many for the current team to handle. Five acts as relay for the calls anyway and I’ve run comms enough times for NASA--”

 Scott turning to face him cut John off. Val stood straighter, ready for the eldest to snap at the younger. 

 “You said you needed to join as someone to fly Thunderbird Three. Now you want to sit up on the space station and run comms?”

 John shook his head, “With the space pods we could still run rescues from up there. Little Lightening would be able to manage most other space rescues, Thunderbird Three would only be needed for anything further than the Moon.” He tilted his head with a small smile, “I thought it might make it seem a little less like I was stealing Alan’s ship.”

 Val glanced to the simulator that had long since become still and quiet. She wondered where Alan had got to, if he’d heard the conversation and was simply remaining quiet, or if he hadn’t heard a thing. 

 Scott’s face fell as he sighed, looking away with a shake of his head, still clearly not convinced about the whole suggestion. 

 “This is our chance at finding Dad, Scott.” John murmured, “We can’t pass that up, can we?”

 Val would have looked back to Scott, except movement from the corner of the simulator caught her eye. Alan approached, looking to John with wide eyes.

 “You can’t live in space all the time though John! It’s dangerous. I don’t mind you flying Three, not really. I was just being a brat before.”

 John shook his head, “It won’t be all the time Alan, we’d work out a rotation or something.”

 “You’d do that?” Scott raised an eyebrow, “Actually work on rotation? You won’t get obsessed?”

 John scoffed and shook his head, “Coming from you?”

 Val could see his point, the eldest pair were as bad as one another for becoming too determined in their goals. She’d seen it before, each of them becoming obsessed with something so wholly that it took over their entire lives. 

 In her eyes Scott was the one at a higher risk of falling into that trap. 

 “I have Ridley now,” John shrugged, “She’ll keep me straight.”

 Scott’s sigh was loud in the open space, his shoulders tense as he shook his head, “If you get in to trouble out there…”

 “You can ground me for the rest of my life.” John shrugged, “We always said Scott, five of us, five ships.”

 “Best place for star gazing.” Alan murmured, eyes widening, “Hey, maybe I can--”

 “No.” Both older brothers stated, making Val snort as she shook her head. At least there was something the pair of them could agree on, even if Alan didn’t approve. 

 “So?” She prompted, “Does this mean we can get Ridley to bring the parts over when she comes home?”

 Scott shrugged and nodded to John, “Talk to him about it, she’s his girlfriend.”

 John grinned, “Oh so it’s going to be like that is it?”

 Val had to hide her snigger behind a cough as she shook her head at the pair. Yes, she didn’t doubt, it would be exactly like that.

#thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds 2015 #Scott Tracy #John Tracy #Alan Tracy #Aunt Val #Lucy AU #Lucy Fic #scribbles writes #Left Behind Part 1 #Left Behind Part 2 #Left Behind Part 3

[thebiasrekkers]

Make It Right [BTS Mafia!AU]

Plot: “It’s always darkest before the dawn…” It’s a dog-eat-dog world in Seoul, South Korea. One has to dwell in the shadows in order to reach for the light. What are you willing to sacrifice in order to feel the sunlight on your face? What will it take to drag you back into darkness? How long will the journey be to make it right?

Rating: NC-17 // NSFW

Genre: Series | Mafia!AU | Crime!AU | Angst | Romance/Fluff

Pairings: Jin x OC | Taehyung/Hoseok x OC | Yoongi/Jungkook x OC

Warnings: Graphic Violence, Heavy Language, Angst, Slow Burn, Smut

Previous Chapters: Prologue 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32

Links: FAQ || BTS Masterlist || Admin E’s AO3 || Admin E’s WP || [ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ]

Word Count: 2,567

Tag List: @prisczero​, @pinkpjmin​, @btsaudge​, @flowerwrites06​, @unoriginal-username15432

Chapter 32: Waste It On Me

“And I know there’s no making this right, And I know there’s no changing your mind...”

© thebiasrekkers (Admin E). All rights reserved. Reposting/modifying our work is prohibited. Translations are not allowed. Plagiarism/stealing is not tolerated by any means. Legal action will be taken in instances of theft.

Seoul – Cheongdam; Gangnam District South Korea

The bigger you are, the harder you fall.

Jimin was aware of this saying and held it close to his heart more often than most. It was his way of maintaining a sense of humility. He tried to impart humble actions to others, remaining as sincere as he could and as it was allowed. Praying and fighting. Fighting and praying. It was a daily routine for him for the last ten years.

But now it was over and while he wasn’t suffering from a lack of purpose, there were other things that troubled his mind. Seemingly insignificant to some and very important to others. Jimin worried below the surface, attempting to hold onto a sense of calm despite the chaos that always seemed to erupt around them. Rain or shine, snow or a hurricane; none of it mattered. Because they’d overcome worse in their lives and this new path they walked would be no different.

Seeing Eden in the hospital – hearing that the Jade Fangs were the ones responsible – ignited something new inside of Jimin. A feeling he wasn’t aware that he could feel. One that he never knew simmered deep within the dark recesses of his own heart.

It was anger.

The feeling shocked him at first; the realization even more. Jimin couldn’t think of a time outside of his elementary years where he got angry. Annoyed? Of course. Irritated? Absolutely. But never anger.

Not until he’d seen Eden’s arm in a sling.

His eyes narrowed as he paid the cab driver. The bigger you are, the harder you fall…

Stepping out of the cab, he closed the door behind him and approached the Cha Gangnam Medical Center. The sliding glass doors automatically pushed open, granting him entrance to the main lobby. He looked around, smiling politely to the receptionist as she waved at him. Brushing his bangs off his forehead, he looked around to see if Raelyn was around. Not long after he shuffled in, she came around a corridor and stopped short upon seeing him.

For a moment, neither of them could say anything. Jimin watched her press her clipboard to her chest, the two of them sighing in tandem with each other. Raelyn did her best to put on a smile that he probably assumed she thought was believable.

It wasn’t.

“Jimin-ah,” she called softly, her voice almost lost in the noise of the lobby, “what are you doing here?”

She crossed over to him and he smiled at her. “I was just coming by to check on you.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the whole truth either. “Are you about to go on break?”

Raelyn looked at her watch, then nodded. “Sure, I can go on break now. Follow me.”

The two of them walked side by side as they made their way down the hall. Several orderlies and nurses greeted Raelyn, as well as a few doctors who were wrapping up their shifts. They rounded two corners and she paused in front of a room, pushing the door open and peering inside. Her shoulders seemed to visibly relax before turning to look at him while fully pressing the door wide.

“It’s just us. Come in.” Jimin followed her and Raelyn stood in front of one of the vending machines. “Coffee?”

“Sure.”

Pressing the button for two hot canned coffees, the machine dispensed the items and Jimin thanked her for the drink. They took their seats at a small round table near the back of the break room where they could talk. However, instead of talking, they opened the coffees and said nothing. Jimin wasn’t sure what was weighing so heavily on Raelyn’s mind, but he had a pretty good idea. The difficult part was broaching the subject in a way that wouldn’t set her off or, worse, cause her to build a wall even higher around her feelings.

“Noona?” She lifted her face to look at him and he could see her eyes shaking, as if Raelyn already knew why he was there. “Can I ask you something?”

Raelyn tried to put on a brave face, her fingers wrapping around the can of coffee. “Sure, Jimin-ah. What is it?”

He took a breath, pressed his lips together in a thin line, before releasing a puff of air from his mouth. “…is your freedom still important to you?”

There was a slight tink of sound as her nails scraped along the aluminum.

She scoffed, trying to brush off his question. “Where’s this coming from all of a sudden?”

“Because your reason for ending things with Hoseok Hyung stemmed from the world we lived in; the cloak of shadows that we wore.” Jimin laced his fingers together as he rested his hands on the table. Raelyn’s façade faltered. “We’re not in the shadows anymore, but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t people who will do whatever it takes to drag us back. We are working to continue our path of success and to do it the legal way.” His eyes narrowed slowly. “And you’ve been actively seeing Taehyung-ah, knowing that people are still trying to grab at our ankles.”

Raelyn frowned this time. “What are you getting at, Jimin-ah?”

“It’s only going to get worse before it gets better.”

His tone was flat and his expression matched. Raelyn’s eyes widened, her brows raising simultaneously. Her hands slid from the can to the table and Jimin lifted his coffee to his lips. He knew how intelligent Raelyn was and so it wouldn’t take her long to figure out where he was headed with this conversation.

“Do you remember what those days were like back then, Noona?” He didn’t tear his gaze from hers. “I know you do.”

“Park Jimin, you—”

“I hope you’re prepared, because now that we’re walking the legal path, there’s no stopping what the others are planning to do. You’ve already seen for yourself what they’re capable of. What lines they’re willing to cross. We can’t just beat them back with chains, whips and knives. Not like before. Not anymore.”

This was the path they were striving to walk on. It was the way they wanted to continue living their lives from now on. Jimin didn’t have to ask his older brothers what was making them feel so uneasy. The bridge they were crossing was rickety. There was no guarantee they’d be able to make it to the other side before burning it behind them – preventing anyone else from breathing down their necks. Ten years of hard work could potentially incinerate in the palm of their hands. Determined to walk the righteous path, to bathe in the sunlight, meant giving up the tools they used when shrouded in darkness.

Money could only do so much. But what it could not do was buy loyalty.

It finally seemed to click for Raelyn, the realization of what Jimin was attempting to get through to her apparent now on her face. But he also knew that if she valued her freedom as much as she claimed, then now was the time for her to make a choice. There would not be another opportunity for her to backtrack. This was the only way out that he could present to her.

“Noona,” he called, his voice gentle and a touch warmer than it had been earlier. She sensed it immediately. “If you’re serious about Taehyung, about any of us, then I won’t interfere, and I will respect your wishes. We prepared for a lot of things, but we didn’t prepare for anyone to try and stop us from leaving.” He sighed, turning his head slightly to avert his gaze. “What they did to Eden Noona? I’m sure it’s just the beginning. They’re trying to make a point.”

“W-What point?” Raelyn’s voice shook only slightly, but he could hear the hint of anger tacked on at the end. “What do they think they’re gonna accomplish by fucking around with our lives?”

Jimin had a few ideas, but he wasn’t willing to voice them. Not out loud. Not yet.

“They’re trying to tell us we can’t keep anything we care about safe.” He craned his neck to look back at her. “Not anymore.”

He watched Raelyn sink back into her chair, as if someone had taken all the wind out of her sails and left her stranded out at sea.

Jimin rose from his chair, taking the can of coffee with him. He slid one hand into his pocket, pivoting on his heel as he turned toward the door. He paused, casting a sidelong glance over his shoulder to look back at her. Raelyn was still staring at the table blankly, trying to process what he’d just said.

“If your freedom is still important to you, then you need to push us away. All of us. For your sake more than ours.”

She blinked rapidly, turning to look at him as though she was seeing him for the first time all day. No, for the first time since she’d known him. Jimin offered her a soft smile instead. One she would recognize and hopefully take comfort in.

“Take care, Raelyn Noona.”

He bowed his head toward her and turned to head out the door. He didn’t look back as he was worried about what his warning meant to her. Would she take it to heart, or would she remain steadfast at their sides?

Will she make the same choice that Eden Noona has?

Seoul – Hannam; Yongsan District South Korea

The drive back to the house was quiet. The taxi driver must have sensed that Jimin had a lot on his mind and left him to his thoughts in the backseat. As traffic melded on the streets, many lights blossomed and painted the windows and streets of Seoul bright colors. Jimin heard pedestrians milling around, some holding conversations that were loud enough for him to hear through the window. He tuned most of it out, however, his own concerns going off like air horns in his brain.

Soon, everything passed by in a blur of colorful lines.

When Jimin walked through the main entryway of the home he shared with his brothers, he felt more exhausted than normal. Like he’d been carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. He announced himself, kicking off his dress shoes and loosening his tie before sliding into his house slippers.

A set of feet shuffled in and he turned to see it was Yoongi, a glass of scotch in his hand. “Just you?” He took a moment to peer over Jimin’s shoulder, as if someone had followed him. “The others?”

Jimin pulled his phone out of his pocket and saw texts from both Jungkook and Taehyung; one saying they’d be home late and the other saying they’d be home tomorrow. “Seokjin Hyung is still at the office with Anastasia Noona. He sent me home early. Namjoon Hyung and Hoseok Hyung are at a business meeting at the hotel.” He peered at Yoongi curiously. “You’re home early.”

Yoongi hummed in response as he took a sip of scotch. “Investors from overseas flew in so I saw to their needs. The official business meeting will be tomorrow. Hoseok-ah wanted to give them a chance to rest before going over paperwork.” He turned to head into the kitchen and Jimin followed after him. “What about the other kids?”

Jimin sat at the kitchen island, watching as Yoongi began pouring him a drink. He waited until the glass was set on a coaster in front of him before speaking. “Taehyung-ah is going to be late.” Reaching for the glass, he ignored the tinkling sound it made when his rings knocked against it.

Yoongi sidled up next to him, raising his glass so they could tap them together in a silent ‘cheers’ fashion. “Jungkook?”

The glass hovered near Jimin’s lips, not sure if he wanted to give him the answer. But he also knew he had no real reason not to. “He said he’s coming back in the morning.”

He saw Yoongi’s expression darken and Jimin sighed, not wanting to get into this conversation at all. But when he remembered what Eden said to him that day at church, as well as Jungkook’s own concerns, he knew he couldn’t avoid it. Jimin was also curious about something and the only way he would get the answers was by asking the person who’d hurt Eden the most.

“Yoongi Hyung?”

Yoongi shook his head, setting the glass down on the coaster and he tried to throw a casual smirk to Jimin. He wasn’t fooling anyone. Him least of all.

“Hm, what is it, Jimin-ah?”

“I know why you did that to Eden Noona.” Jimin stared into his glass, refusing to meet Yoongi’s gaze. “I get it more than you probably think I do.” A sad smirk passed over his features. “You were trying to keep her safe in your own way. I’m sure she’ll understand that someday, if she doesn’t already.”

Yoongi laughed but the tone was off; bitter and cold. “It doesn’t matter. She has Jungkook looking after her now.”

“Noona can take care of herself, you should know that.” Jimin continued staring into the glass, the pads of his fingers pressing into its cold surface. “You regret it, don’t you Hyung?” He turned his head to see Yoongi glaring down at the marble counter top. “You regret not trusting her.”

Yoongi blinked, his head moving slowly to look back at Jimin with confusion in his eyes. “What?”

“You didn’t let her into our world because you were afraid she’d get fed up with it. Not hurt by it.” Jimin paused, watching Yoongi’s eyes narrow. “Eden Noona is strong, you’ve seen that for yourself, Hyung. Her environmental safety wasn’t what you were worried about.”

“Ya, Park Jimin,” said Yoongi quietly, the warning clear.

Jimin had no plans to heed it.

“What you were actually scared of was Noona seeing the real you, weren’t you?” Jimin frowned. “You couldn’t trust her to stay with you when she found out. But now you see that isn’t the case, because she’s with our younger brother now, in spite of everything.”

Yoongi’s fist slammed into the marble, causing their glasses to rattle. The sudden action didn’t even make Jimin flinch. Instead, he placed a hand on Yoongi’s shoulder. The two of them said nothing and it wasn’t until Jimin gave it a reassuring squeeze did he let out a sigh.

“You’re scared she’s going to get hurt for real this time. And it won’t be by any of us.”

He watched Yoongi drain his glass and set it back on the table. “This is just the beginning. Those bastards have barely started scratching the surface.” Yoongi placed a hand on his forehead, turning to look at Jimin and his eyes looked more tired than they had just a few minutes ago. “…but you’re right, Jimin-ah. I’m scared. I’m scared of what they’re planning to do next.”

Jimin nodded, his hand sliding off Yoongi’s shoulder to return to the counter top. The two of them held their glasses; one empty and the other untouched.

“Me too, Hyung.” There was a heaviness in Jimin’s voice that he hadn’t meant to let slip. But it was too late to take it back and there wasn’t really a point to it. “…I’m scared too.”

#bangtanarmynet #btsbookclub #btswriterscollective #mknlinenet #ficswithluv #bts #bts fanfiction #bts fanfics #bts fanfic #bts imagines #bts scenarios #bts mafia au #bts crime au #bts mafia!au #bts crime!au #bts ot7 #bts x angst #bts x violence #bts x slow burn #bts x smut #bts slow burn #bts angst #thebiasrekkers #bts thebiasrekkers #thebiasrekkers bts #bts make it right #make it right bts

[livlepretre]

for the writing ask! 8, 9, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 19, 20, 21, 30, 31, 32, 44, 48, 51, 53, 54 (any other advice?) - sorry for all the questions. im just really curious, lol

oh geez haha I will endeavor to answer!

8. Favorite trope to write.

obviously enemies to lovers 😈

9. Least favorite trope to write. can I list fluff as a trope 

12. How do you deal with self-doubts?

I hit publish the same way other people do impulsive things like jump off a bridge (I did that too once. woke up with nightmares about it for weeks). When you’re doubting yourself-- and I doubt myself all! the! time!-- the best thing to do is to steel yourself for like 5 seconds, take the leap, and then wait. Most of the time people are incredibly kind and receptive, and whatever plot point was causing the anxiety will either go unnoticed or will be appreciated by someone out there. I feel like so long as the writing comes from a place of honesty and isn’t about sensationalizing or taking advantage of anyone, then it will work out.

13. How do you deal with writers block? I let myself put the work down and don’t stress about it. I have a rule where I only write if I feel like writing. It’s a hobby for me, so if I decide I would rather watch The Office or go for a walk with my husband, I just do what I want instead. A lot of times that’s because I have writer’s block, but writer’s block can’t be pushed. 

If I am determined to write here are some strategies I employ: 

Chances are I’m stuck because I don’t know exactly what’s going to happen, or I’m not certain of what a character would do. So I reread the story up until that point, make notes on anything I laid down earlier that is relevant to the part I’m on, and map out character motivations. Hopefully this helps me create a working outline that will push me forward. 

If I’m stuck because of trouble writing the story in a more profound sense, I put the story down and start something new and low stress. In other words, I intentionally start a project where the bar for publication is super low.  For example, both Love Bites and (The Stars Were Brightly Shining) are pretty much first draft stories. I would write the chapter and hit publish same day (most of the time). This gave me something fun to do that was still exercising the writing muscle but also gave me the opportunity for positive feedback and made writing fun again. 

If I can’t write at all, then I turn to reading. I read things that I really like, and I take notes on what I like about the story both from a narrative structure/plot perspective and in terms of the writer’s style and word choice. In theory we’re supposed to read a lot as writers, and writer’s block is a great chance to do so. 

And, eventually, I’ll be cooking or typing up something for work or in the shower and the missing puzzle piece will fall into place. It’s okay if that takes months. I’ve had 4 hiatuses on FE that have lasted 4-6 months each. So long as you want to finish the story, you will. 

14. What’s the most research you ever put into a book? ehhh probably watching seasons 1-2 of The Originals so I could figure out certain plot elements for FE. I do get sucked into research holes every now and then, but as they’re largely useless I try to scramble out of them as quickly as possible. (I say this with fear in my heart for the research I would have to do to write the 1492 time travel story I have in mind) 

15. Where does your inspiration come from?

Poetry, books I read and love, folklore, songs, my unhappy adolescence 

16. Where do you take your motivation from?

Honestly I get A LOT of motivation from everyone who reads and sends me a message. FE is a much bigger and much more arduous project than I anticipated, and the support has been a HUGE help. Also, for my other projects like SWBS, it’s such an inspiration to keep thinking about it and to get back to it whenever someone mentions it to me. I really do thrive on the community aspect of writing. 

Also, it’s turned out that the older I’ve gotten the more disciplined I’ve grown as a writer. I’m 30 now, and there’s a huge difference between my writing habits the last few years and what passed for them when I was 21 and writing After the Fire, But Before the Flood. 

19. First line of a WIP you’re working on.

Three broken ribs, a punctured lung, a broken collarbone, and a concussion, with bruising along her face, from where it connected with the side pillar, and along her throat and chest from the seatbelt. Two dead parents. A low buzz throughout the town: her name on everyone’s lips. - Nights at the Museum

20. Post a snippet of a WIP you’re working on.

Damon looks at her and cants his head to the side and he tells her, voice flip and unreachable as only his can be, “I see you’ve cheated death again.” He makes it sound like it’s him she’s cheated by not finishing the turn. 

She opens her mouth to respond, but what can she say? Death still sits heavy in her lungs. Smoke burns her eyes and blood clogs her nose. She could choke on the smothering weight of it all. On the weight of his expectation in her. His disappointment. 

“I never wanted to be a vampire,” she tells him, finally.

The look Damon gives her strips her bare. Somehow over the past six months she has let him in, and now that he is here, she cannot hide from him. “You never wanted to make a choice with your eyes open.” 

-Innocence 

21. Post the last sentence you wrote in one of your WIP’s.

well this is pretty spoilery for FE, so, reader beware: 

Rebekah has her pinned by an arm around her waist, her back flush to Rebekah’s front, both of them kneeling on the bed, while Rebekah reaches around and slowly fucks her with her hand. - Fairytale Ending

30. Favorite line you’ve ever written.

Right now I am very fond of this: 

Looking up into his face, into his eyes, gone dark and blue as the river back home when the moon was low in the sky, she finally admits the truth she's been hiding from herself for months. The thing she has been most afraid to ever, ever say, even to herself. Her gravest sin, which in this moment, feels like her redemption. "I love you." Saying it out loud is like the moment she drove the knife into her own side. - Fairytale Ending 

31. Hardest character to write.

Damon -- he has a very particular kind of humor and cynicism which I find really difficult to replicate (although I think I’m getting more confident) 

32. Easiest character to write.

Klaus-- literally there is nothing too extreme, it’s so much fun 

44. Best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten. This will make like no sense but it’s from a creative writing class I took in high school, and the feedback was actually given to one of my friend, and I’ve remembered it ever since: “You have to use your avocado knives.” The context was basically he mentioned a pair of avocado knives sitting on a table and they never come up again. It’s the chekhov’s gun idea: when you put something down in the story, you have to actually use it. Everything in the narrative should have meaning if it’s mentioned, and work either functionally, metaphorically, or emotionally. 

48. Favorite genre to write in. Horror. 

51. Describe the aesthetic of your story _______ in 5 sentences or words. I’ll assume this is for FE: 

Gothic horror, where the blood is both in the grass and on the heroine’s hands. 

53. What does writing mean to you? It’s just something that I really, really like. 

54. Any writing advice you want to share?

I shared the bulk of it yesterday so here’s the rest: do what you want and have fun. 

#evanescentrainbow #asks #ask game #on writing #fairytale ending #innocence #nights at the museum

[dailyaudiobible]

03/31/2021 DAB Transcript

Deuteronomy 16:1-17:20, Luke 9:7-27, Psalms 72:1-20, Proverbs 12:8-9

Today is the 31st day of March welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I'm Brian it is great to be here with you. If it's the 31st day of March then it's the last day of March and that's what it is, the last day of the third month of the year. So, the last day of March, the last day of the first quarter of the year. Whew! Can you believe it? It's just so weird, time. It’s just so elastic. It just…because I’m gonna be we saying the same thing to you in six months or whatever and it’s gonna be October and it will be like wasn't it just…wasn't it just March? But here we are. This is how it works. We just keep showing up. This is how it works. Show up, take the next step forward, show up, take the next step forward and we move all the way through the year together in community and through the Bible. And what a year it's been so far. So, anyway last day of the year. Congratulations for making it this far. If you have made it this far there is…you can do this. Like, it’s not a matter of whether you could or couldn't anymore. You can. You’ve made it a quarter of the year. We've got this. And, so, let's dive in. We are in the book of Deuteronomy as we reach the conclusion of our first quarter of the year. Moses is speaking. Moses is the speaker in all of Deuteronomy. These are the things that he needs to say before he is no longer the leader of this people before the transition of power or authority is bestowed upon Joshua and Moses becomes a part of history. And, so, Moses has everyone's attention. He has led them every step of the way and he's reviewing a lot of things and we’re reviewing a lot of the key aspects of the law at this point. Deuteronomy chapters 16 and 17.

Commentary:

Okay. So, we’ve already talked about how this is the last day the month, it’s the last day of the quarter. And, yeah, we’ll flip the page and tomorrow will be a new month and a new quarter and then the day after tomorrow will be good Friday. And, so, we’re in the middle of holy week and we’re coming to the end of the Lenten season for those who have kind of engaged in it to some degree. And we…we’re  moving toward Easter. And we very, very often just move past all of the holy week stuff, the contemplation of…of the sacrifice and just move into Easter and we’ve talked about that before too, about not doing that. And, so, this is kind of one of those times because we’re seeing this story where Jesus goes to Caesarea Philippi. And we talked about this story already but the question that comes out of the story - “who do you say that I am?” - there's not is not a more important question than that, maybe in life. But right now, as we are moving forward, moving forward into new seasons, and embracing where we are as…as we observe Good Friday and think of Jesus crucifixion and His death. And on Saturday just sitting with the loss, basically, because Jesus died and was laid in a tomb and laid in the tomb dead. Like all is lost and then all things are made new. And yet this question, “Who do you say that I am?” sort of burns its way through all of that and continues to come front and center because the answer to that question really truly dictates the trajectory of our entire life. And, so, it's fitting that we would cross this territory as we prepare to leave this quarter behind and move into a new month and move directly into Easter, that this question would sit there like the bookend at the end of a quarter, almost like everything that we have read and learned and thought about and contemplated in the Scriptures up to this point, almost like everything has been leading us to this question.

Prayer:

Jesus, we embrace that fully. We could answer like Peter, You are the Messiah, You are the son of the living God, and that is true, that is our declaration. And yet, how would we…where would we even start if we needed to say all that You are because You are more than we can say and You are more than enough. And yet even declaring that to You in a statement of worship it's also a convicting thing because we can say You are more than enough and then look at the way we live as if that's anything but true. And, so, this question “who do what You say that I am?” really does dictate where we’re going. We want to embrace that today and over the next several days as we move into and through the Easter celebration. What is our lives saying? Who do we say that You are? Come Holy Spirit into that question. Lead us down the pathways of our own hearts we pray in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it's the website, it's where you find out what’s going on around here. Of course, as I've mentioned many times if you are using the Daily Audio Bible app you can access these things from there as well by using the Drawer icon in the upper left-hand corner.

So, yeah, check out the Community section. This is where the Prayer Wall is. This is where we get connected.

Check out the Daily Audio Bible Shop. This is where there are resources in many different categories that we've developed over the years for the journey. This particular one, the one that we’re on, the one that is a voyage through a year and across the entire Bible, so that…well…by the time we’re done we’ve read every word, every sentence, every paragraph, every verse. And it's a big book. And, so, taking a journey through a year and investing a year of life together in community to take this journey, there are many resources for that journey in the Daily Audio Bible Shop. So, check that out.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, if this mission that we share to bring the spoken word of God read fresh every day and given freely to anyone who will listen to it anywhere on this planet any time of day or night and to build community around that rhythm so that we know we’re not alone on this journey, we’re together and we’re going through the same kinds of stuff our brothers and sisters are going through all around the world. And just have that solidarity as we take this journey is so important and so meaningful. And if that's been true for you, it's important and meaningful than thank you for your partnership. There is a link on the homepage at dailyaudiobible.com. If you’re using the app you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or the mailing address, if that’s your preference, is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or encouragement you can hit the Hotline button in the app, which is the little red button up at the top or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hello this is Mountain Girl from New Mexico I just want to thank Brian and Jill and everyone that's involved in the Daily Audio Bible. I've been listening for 12 years and it has become a major part of my life. I would like to pray for Phil. Father I ask that You’d bless his son Andrew who is having open heart surgery. I pray for guidance and wisdom for the doctors, and I pray for healing for Andrew, and I pray that You'd lead and guide Phil. Kingdom Seeker Daniel, I pray for his son Daniel and his mental illness and I just pray for healing for his mind Father. You are a great healer and I ask You to heal his mind. I pray for the lady that called in and sang tis so sweet to trust in Jesus. That was absolutely beautiful. Thank you. Miley from Canada who's retiring from being a family doctor and persecuted for her faith. I just pray for guidance for you and for wisdom and the Lord would lead you to exactly what He wants you to do. Marla from Kentucky whose friend Steve had a stroke. I pray for healing. I pray Lord that You would help him and help him to recover, and I just pray that everyone involved would become closer to You through this trial. C with postpartum and the kids and her husband, Lord I just pray for emotional healing for emotional support. I pray Lord that You would help them and that You would heal her and guide her. For redeemed Rachel whose pastors leaving in a cross-country move. I pray Lord that so many changes but that you would be her constant through all this and that You would be her rock. Jaws of Life in New Hampshire, I pray for you marriage and I pray that God would heal your marriage. I pray that He would be the steady force in your life that would heal. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Heidi DAB Family this is Laura in South Florida. Today is the 28th day of March and this morning I heard a prayer request from someone who did not give their name, but it was a girl who is dealing with a sexual sin. And I just want to tell you dear sister whenever you ask God for to forgive you, He forgives. God is always honest and always truthful. Whatever He says is true and He says if you confess your sins, He is faithful and just to forgive your sin and to cleanse you from all unrighteousness. My sweet sister you are forgiven. I love that word, forgiven. Believe me, I have…I have asked God to forgive me many times and I…I am so grateful for his forgiveness. And I just pray sister that you would just…just every time you feel an urge to sin that you would just say God, I can't do this without You. Please God Holy Spirit give me Your strength to do this and thank You Jesus.

Good morning Daily Audio Bible family my name is Julie I've been listening for many years, but this is the first time this introvert has called in and I just wanted to call because as we’re reading through Deuteronomy and listening to Moses his words for the people I can't help but think, you know, see what a compassionate person he is. Here he is not going into the promised land because of them yet he still loves them dearly and is still trying to teach them so that they can be successful. It's just…it is so wonderful, and I feel that this community is Moses too. I feel that we’re a compassionate people, the body of God helping each other, praying for each other. And I just wanted to call and say thank you to all of you are there for this community and keep…keep calling in with your praise reports, keep calling in with your prayers and, who knows, I might call in yet again. It only took four months this year before I made the commitment that I was. So maybe…maybe it won't take another four months for me to call in again but love you all. Thank you.

Hi DAB family this is your sister Julie from North Idaho. I just wanted to call and encourage my little sister that called and didn't leave her name on the podcast that was on March 28th. Sweetheart, thank you so much for making yourself vulnerable to the rest of us and you are in a safe place. And you called and asked the right people to help you out. We’re your brothers and sisters in Christ and we support you and we absolutely encourage you and want to thank you for asking for forgiveness. Honey, you're forgiven, first through the eyes of Jesus and then through your brothers and sisters in Christ in this DAB family. And we also want you to know that while you have been forgiven you need to forgive yourself sweetheart. And sometimes that's so much harder than asking for forgiveness from others. You need to know that you are washed and cleansed by the blood of Jesus, that He no longer counts your sin against you, and that just the fact that you are emotionally and spiritually asking for forgiveness and to be healed and restored, honey, know that it's already been done as soon as you asked Him. Lord we ask that you heal and restore our little sister. You know who…what her name is Lord and we just pray for deliverance and we pray for emotional healing, spiritual healing, and physical healing. To you be all glory honesty and honor Lord Jesus. We love you and honor you and thank you for hearing our prayer and putting your protection at our you're covering over our little sister. May she live in freedom praising you and thanking you for being her Lord and savior. We ask this in Jesus’ name. Amen. I love you my brothers and sisters in Christ. Have a wonderful day and happy Easter. He is risen!

This is Candace from Oregon I'm gonna be asking prayers for Karen in Florida but before I do that I just want to say that in my own life, I'm 64 years old now, but I had children starting as a very, very young person first one born when I was 21 and my husband was a really, really great husband a really good provider, did not have as much of a vision as a parent. He didn't ever, you know, get up in the middle of the night with a baby or change a diaper. He didn't…that just wasn't his desire or his thing. He didn't go, you know, throw a ball with his boy or anything like that. So, I raised these three kids alone…also because he was working 70- or 80-hour weeks or off and he was in Asia or traveling somewhere far away. So, I raised them alone although we had materially what we needed. And, so, it was a great relief to me when I turned…we both turned 58 and he retired early. And at the time our oldest child was living here with us with her 3-year-old son and they lived here with us for three years that it was just really wonderful to parent this little boy together rather than me just alone. And, you know, it was really three of us parenting this little boy which was delightful. So, Lord I pray for Karen in Florida, a single grandma raising a 13-year-old in a high…she’s in a highly demanding job. The 13-year-old is homeschooling, she's raising a 3-bedroom household by herself. So, Lord lift her up, be her husband, make this go incredibly smoothly. Let her feel Your support around her at all times and Your guidance and Your provision and we ask this in Jesus’ name.