#like-- i am having progress with the battle and improving my timing so i guess that's something? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dzpenumbra · 1 year

Text

3/23/23

Palindrome day, cool! For Americans, at least. I have to remind myself that not everyone uses the same measures and languages. Something we all should remember, I guess.

I started the day with a yoga practice that was way above my level. Like... my legs were actually giving out. My quads are just... I guess they're just not as strong as they used to be. Same with my abs. It's weird. I mean, I'm hardly active, I know... but... I have been skating... and doing yoga every day for.. almost 3 entire months straight now.

It's not going out into the woods and hiking around barefoot every day, combing the rivers for cool stones, moving big rocks to make sculptures and shit. That shit gets you in shape real quick. But I don't know, I feel like I should be in better shape than I am. Maybe it's just part of getting older, I dunno.

So yeah, yoga kicked my ass. But it was good, in the end. I haven't been meditating. I don't know why. Today, it was because I was really hungry, and I just wanted to get food. But when I was in the kitchen, I did dishes and everything, so I definitely had the time. I guess I just... naturally avoid it.

It's not like I wrestle with thoughts as much as I used to. Thank god, that shit was rough. It's still a thing, just... I don't care as much, I can turn the volume down and let the thoughts flow without getting attached a lot of the time. Not all the time, but a lot of the time. Honestly, I think the problem is my posture. The problem is my sitting position is really uncomfortable. And it hasn't really been improving. And that's really upsetting me. It's been months. I must be missing something, or just undoing all the good I do in the morning by sitting at the computer or being hunched over at the drafting table all day.

I can't get my knees down, I can't find the right place to hold my weight, I feel like my coccyx just tilts under my body and arches my back when it should be straight, my abs get grumpy that they have to activate at all, and my neck just can't seem to process what a straight line from my pelvis to my heart to my head even looks like. I, of course, am trying to sort this all out with... no mirror, just visualization. But it feels like I'm just bent and contorted in all kinds of hunched over shapes. And it's very hard to find a place to sit still for 10-15 minutes where I'm not constantly correcting my body position. It's tedious. It's hard to focus on solely my breathing when... oops, a knee is raised... okay, now relax the hips, don't need to grip... ok, now your neck is craning, straighten that... okay, relax the face... oooo tension in the hands, relax that a bit... Hardly letting go of thoughts, just focusing on how depressingly out of shape I am. Even without judgment, it's still stressful, it's work!

So yeah... skipped that. Maybe if I get brave enough to go to an in-person yoga class, they'll help me correct that. I mean, that's like... kinda their job. But I think I'm going to wait for the gastric distress to let up before I go there... think that might be a smart idea...

I cut my hair (very overdue), showered and trimmed my beard pretty nicely. I actually watched a video on how to do it, I have never looked it up before, and the instructions from the guy who I was watching were... basically what I already do, which was validating. There were just small alterations, like only bringing the clippers straight down rather than against the grain or following the jawline. I'm thinking of growing it out again, I'm already past an inch, so I might as well... I'll see how it goes.

The bulk of the day again went to working on the hoodie. And it looks fucking sick. It's really starting to take shape. The eternal race-against-time battle of working with acrylics as they progressively dry out and turn into fucking rubber has been... oddly nostalgic. Acrylic was my primary medium in college. So... this isn't foreign, it's just a bit annoying. And it's really on me for just using the paint out of the jar rather than using my palette. But... it's getting really close to finished. The only work left is... the black outlining, the shading, then figuring out with to do with the thin outermost ring, which I might actually embellish, while I'm at it. It might be done tomorrow, might be the day after, not sure.

I've also developed a bit of a process for the new desire path mapping project, which is working well so far. I have 15 runs down already, 10 tracked. It helps a lot using a shorter route. And the routes still have a nice amount of detail to them. The desire path mod does take a bit longer to erode the dirt than I was hoping... Like... a lot. So I have no clue how many of these runs I'm going to have to take before I start seeing some erosion in the wild.

I was considering streaming while I did this, just to share the process, you know? And to tag it as Art rather than Minecraft to keep the children out, so I just... don't have to deal with it. I'm sorry, I just... it's nothing against kids in general, it's just... teens, honestly. I'm not using minecraft in this context to play minecraft, I'm not even really playing with most of the mods I have on, I'm using it as a tool. So... Art feels much more accurate. And if there's some 16 year old looking for Art on Twitch who stumbles across Minecraft... they'll probably be a bit more open-minded than a 16 year old looking for Minecraft on Twitch... and stumbling across this weird art project instead. Just trying to cultivate a vibe, being in the right category can help with that. But... I didn't stream... because I didn't want to depend on chat for entertainment outside of listening to music and walking through the woods. I wanted to listen to someone else's stream or youtube instead. I run into this problem a lot. So... that's just how it went. Tough shit to the zero people who would've been interested in this anyway. Maybe next time!

Honestly, I have no idea what I'm even going to do with the end product. This piece is very much making itself, and I'm just... letting it happen. And the end result is actually looking pretty damn cool, I really like the designs. Here's the progress so far:

I have no idea where I could do this... but I'd be interested in doing it IRL as well someday. With GPS tracking, I had a hiking app that did that, it just mapped where you hiked. It's an exciting prospect, but I would need to find the right area, and I don't know how that would go, or how safe it really is to do a project like that without someone... knowing where I am.

The idea, for anyone coming into this late, is to basically capture the process of... exploring, getting lost, learning, and gaining orientation. It's a visual demonstration of what it looks like from a birds eye view as one gets lost and wanders between two points. Tracking their entire path, step by step and rendering it on a map as a line, like a GPS route. They travel from point A to point B with only general directions of how to get there. Over time, landmarks are recognized, routines are built, the wandering gets less and less. And, in turn, a path starts to form, as the ground becomes well traveled. I'm calling it a desire path project, even though the focus isn't so much about desire paths as it is... just paths in general. But whatever. It's working well in minecraft, but I'd love to try it in real life sometime. But again, the stakes for willingly getting lost in the woods when you have no friends or family and no one knows or cares where you are are... quite high. So... Maybe I'll put it off for a bit, pop that on the back burner.

So yeah, that was about it. My ex kept popping into my head today, I really don't know why. Maybe something reminded me of her. And not in a good way, like... reminders of the secrets she kept from me, that I naively looked past. That kinda shit. And I had a big emotional overwhelm moment with remembering Maxine today. Which hit me really hard and had me sitting on the floor in the bathroom crying. Grief sucks. My girls really were my world, they were my family. I miss them so much, it's crazy how different my life is now without them.

Yeah, not an insanely exciting day, not a ton went on, I guess in a way I can be grateful for that. Very productive though. I'm really excited for how this hoodie is coming along, I'll share the final state of the back piece when it's ready in a few days.

#diary #journal #online journal #stream of consciousness #stream of thoughts

0 notes

kirkhiggins · 2 years

Text

The Advanced Guide To Online Game

This is exactly what the saying "need previous to greed" normally means. This permits people to both go on components they don't desire, or roll want when they'll want it or greed if they could utilize it however do not will need it. Evidently if you're into the flying games on-line interface you may need to possess a considerable speed connection. Nowadays nearly all flying games on-line have or make use of Google maps as a side with the navigation program, this allows for worldwide navigation. Developer Kinship and gamigo have used the Closed Beta to assemble in depth participant feedback, which result in steady enhancements in balancing and tackled gameplay bugs. A fantastic central server may have numerous groupings that you may be a part of, from civil flying to armed service operations, seek for the groupings the place there's a central controller identical to the actual life ATC. However do you know which is the world’s second largest search engine? In time, you might get to know them and know their character and what's and isn't ok to say throughout them. Should you want to create pals and develop bonds inside your MMORPG, know find out methods to play good. Never walk into a situation intending to look around and pick something out on the spot before hanging a very good bargain. The good laptop on Television service, you're going to get all Television channels you need for a onetime fee of $50. It seems just like the Battle Royale recreation will add a set of 200-player modes in the future. One factor which I really like about this webpage is that stories are rated by temperature rating based on recognition of the sport. Although this one doesn't present fancy gadgets or furnishings to play with per se, it does completely improve gamer experience in other methods. Nonetheless, when communicating with strangers, do not forget that one other human getting is on the obtaining finish of that which you say. And so in the end it's not in any respect pretty much the amount of time you might need as properly because the amount of time you spend making an attempt to play the actual online video games nonetheless a lot more with reference to, you guessed the idea, flow. Add-Ons for added landscape at additional value is customary in nearly each software, relying by yourself needs the frequent scenery that arrives together with the program might be sufficient. The dimensions with the software program is only relative to disk storage, what's essential is the code used within the software package and how fast it processes information and entry to files. Right, domino228 will be in a position to show off traits whereas working the software program package deal nonetheless then what's the logic in paying for a costly utility when you are not capable of employ all of its components? The fun on-line games are inside reach 24/7 and that what makes it simple. Enjoying online taking pictures games increase you intelligence degree in strategizing totally different technique. The merchandise tends to make the game play effectively and also I acquire caught up from the second; with the time I am lost throughout yet another world, which may be my cause behind enjoying. MMORPG stands for Massively Multiplayer On-line Position Playing Sport. As a substitute of shifting and progressing in levels and ranks just like most of on-line MMORPG games, gamers of RuneScape acquire and enhance their expertise all through the game hence permits them to work out quests which they aren't geared up before. The main draw to an MMORPG is the truth that you are having fun with with real persons. The primary objective of the game is to destroy the entire pigs which are discovered situated on the sphere. If that is what you're wondering then worry not! Resolve which rodent you desire to, then name it and choose whether you desire a male or a feminine. So, if you assume that you're going to lose points then you'll be able to drop out from the game and be a part of another desk. Getting first charge premium Flying Games Online will not be very tough; there should not very many actual feeling flying laptop software program spherical. Even supposing this rule was instated lengthy again, when the very first chat functions grew to turn into nicely-liked, a large number of individuals still have not any idea it exists. Now, the brand new and new players merely see that what they grew up with, extremely graphic enjoyable on-line games that may problem them in so many levels. A number of of those games are rated by customers, helping you to locate the most well-liked flash video games out there. You will see a chat area the place players are sometimes corresponding (usually in their very own unusual type of shorthand that you could be or may not ever wish to learn).

#situs judi qq

1 note · View note

akane171 · 2 years

Text

Yes, I am sure😅😂

Yuuup, definitely poor dude 😅😖

Well, the SPN fandom is a place of crazies and madness, soo🤷🏻‍♀️😉😂

Wasn't that the scene in the OG Naruto? But Shipuuden had flashbacks of Naruto hanging out with Shikamaru and Choji🤔 Ah, whatever, I'm starting to get confused😂😂😂🙈

Yeah, I never understood that either, like the Third Hokage even PROMISED Minato and Kushina to protect Naruto and showcase him as a hero😅🤦🏻‍♀️

HAHAHAHAHA that is quite ironic😂 But didn't the newest pope even speak up several times about ACCEPTING such stuff? (I might be remembering this wrong, I don't really keep up with what which religion is currently in favor of but I think he said sth a few years ago?)🤔😅

Yes, worry about you... Calling that "entertaining" is quite worrying😅🙈

Yes, RL is like that, NOT fanfics😭

😂😂😂😂 I suppose? 😂😂😂😂

Hmm, not sure if the theory will ever be addressed🤔😅

Yeaaah...Most fillers are annoying tho some were indeed nice🤔😅

Hahaha, they'd throw the most awesomest of parties😂😍

...Please don't remind me of Scott and Malia, that was just random and weird...🙈😅

You're welcome?😅😂

Naah, I'll accept suggestions but most often then not, I'll choose, so kinda yeah😂 Everybody else just gotta shut their cakeholes😉😉

Honestly, Keith and Jim are two of my absolutely most loved things ever right now😂😂 I could watch them be silent and make gestures in interviews all day every day😂😂 (Imagine those Space puppies meeting our Karamel Space puppies😂 I feel like Keith, Jim and Mon (and Winn) would get along brilliantly😂😂😉)

Uhh, now that you say it, Linkin Park fans really do seem to be Skillet fans, too🤔🤔 Maybe because the vibe of both bands' older songs is kinda similar?🤔🤔

Ohh, Sleeping at Last is kinda an opposite to the rest😂🤷🏻‍♀️ They usually have more calming even kinda sad songs🤔😅 You might know their song "Saturn" tho, that one seems pretty widely known🤔

Ohh, FictionJunction and Two Steps from Hell?😱😍 I'll need to check out the rest when I have time tho, I'm really bad with titles and names, so not sure if I know them😅🙈

😂😂😂 medical harassment, Huh?😉

Thanks😊

Btw, OMG HAVE YOU READ THE NEW CHAPTER SHE UPLOADED, LIKE, OMG, IT WAS SO UNEXPECTED AND AHAHSHSHSHSHDKFLFLFLDNDBDKSÖSÖSNEBEKDODLDDK I WAS TOTALLY SCREAMING AND HYPER-ENERGIZED AFTER GETTING THE NOTIFICATION😍😍😍 (already read it twice, but still gotta read again and finally get around to commenting🙈🙈) I AM STILL SOOO HYPED EVEN THO IT'S BEEN HOURS😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

XXX

Don't believe ya :)))))

SPN fandom made me realize how incest is popular in some spaces.... and my life was not the same since then....

I think it was during the flashbacks of their first big ass battle? When Naruto was for the first time remembering how their relationship started. I think? It was long time ago and I ERASED the memory of that manga/anime from my brain =='

And here we ended, with Naruto hated by the whole village and Sasuke alone, miserable and cultivating a big ass piss at his brother. Splendid!

He was telling some progressive stuff and then told some shit about Ukraine and well, pissed me off :))) but I guess he is better than the last two. What is not a big... improvement, but whatever.

I'm innocent! You are creating some weird stuff about me in your head!

Probably it won't. That's how the producers approach their shows *glares at the SG*

Scott and Malia was the perfect example of how they fucked up perfectly working ships (Stalia and Scira) for fanonship (frucking sty dia) and realized they don't have a ship for the main hero, so they put him with his FRIEND, even when there was nothing romantic. Ever. Because friendships between males and females can't exist right??? I'm still so pissed :/

Lol, best pals for lives xD Seriosuly, we need more weirdos in our lives XD

Yeah, and some of the other bands you sent me have that vibe too, I guess it's similar genre? Not sure, because aside of the Linkin Park, I don't listen to this type too much. Still good music :D As for Skillet, there is something in their music that doesn't make me their fan, but can't tell what exactly.

Nope, sorry, I don't know that song, bands like them are not really popular here and I have never really dug into them.

FictionJunction is just perfect. And Two Steps From Hell made a lot of pieces that help me creating the space opera ideas xD they are very... epic xD

medical harassment - fuck yeah.

Nooooo, still didn't have time for that, but will soon :D Happy you are happy and for sure LW is going to be happy too xDDD

#ReFail #my fam

0 notes

bouncingkadachi · 3 years

Text

Blessed Rain

Summary: A Hunter’s weapon of choice says a lot about them. OR: Kyle upgrades his weaponry and gets caught red-handed in the act. Luckily (?) for him, only Tsukino seems to know exactly why he's having an emotional crisis over this.

Word count: 3,260

Note(s): set post-game

Also available on AO3!

Kyle’s had his new bow for a good couple of weeks before the feel of the limbs and the weight of the draw became comfortable enough for him to consider upgrading it. If he’s going to be injured, he reasons, he’d rather it be purely by way of monster and not because he pulls a muscle wrestling with a bow that hasn’t been properly broken in. His wallet despairs as he forks over the zenny, but this’ll hopefully let him take on some of the bigger hunts like the ones that Reverto goes on. It’ll all be worth the investment up front once he has his completely finished bow and restocked his coatings and finally drops the last of his coin on a couple new talismans.

He refuses to think about the implications of his reasoning with a literal coin, rolling it around and around his fingers as he pushes through the market throngs towards the smithy’s. Perhaps he ought to have a change of scenery—the fog-shrouded summits of Terga were said to be particularly beautiful at this time of year, and the heat in Lamure was becoming just shy of unbearable.

The final product that the blacksmith puts into his hands when he finally makes it to collect is nothing short of gorgeous. Blessed Rain is sleek where his old Rex bow was bulky, far lighter and certainly not as clunky. The upgrades on the riser gives the entire weapon a pleasant solidness in his hand, yet the delicately reinforced plating on the limbs doesn’t retract at all from its flexibility. The decorative grip protector gleams. Just looking at it makes Kyle excited to shoot.

“Bring her back if you’re finding that you need anything adjusted,” the smith tells him after Kyle’s diligently inspected every inch of the bow. “Kept the poundage the same for you, but added another inch to the draw length like you asked.”

“Thanks,” Kyle says. Eventually, he’d like to work up to the point where he can up the poundage again. Even just another five pounds would be good. He can do most of the hunts in his skill range alone now, but extra firepower would make him just that much more efficient, or that much of a better support for team hunts.

The smith laughs when Kyle sheepishly admits this. “Well, I always like to help a Hunter improve, and you know where to find me,” he says cheerily, clapping Kyle enthusiastically on the shoulder. “Come by again anytime if you need a tune up or want to test out something new.”

And with that, he waves Kyle away so that another Hunter can step up, holding a tired-looking sword and shield and looking equally exhausted. “Aye, rookie Hunter?” Kyle hears as he wanders off to find a more relaxed corner of the market in which to admire his new bow some more. “If you’ve got the materials I can repair and upgrade that for you.” The conversation peters out and melts into the general din of the marketplace as Kyle slips into the crowd, taking care to step out of the way of a Felyne carrying an absolutely massive basket groaning with produce. He watches the precarious load totter away, trying and failing to locate Tsukino in the brief respite the parted crowd affords him. They’d split earlier that morning and he hasn’t seen her since.

He still hasn’t managed to find even a whisker of Tsukino’s whereabouts by the time he settles into a decently quiet nook next to a stall selling all manner of spices. Pity, because the dappled light spilling through the colorful drapes of the marketplace catches so beautifully on the milky-white sheen of the bow, and he’d been looking forward to showing it to her. As a Hunter, Kyle will always care more about weapon practicality than aesthetics, but as a normal human being he certainly won’t turn down the opportunity to have both an aesthetically pleasing and perfectly functional weapon. He’s still grinning a little when he goes to strap the bow to his back, and it’s in the process of looking up that his gaze catches onto wide eyes staring plainly at him from across the street.

He freezes, arm suspended awkwardly halfway to sheathing. His beautiful bow glints damningly in the bright Lamure sunlight as his unexpected friend wades through the throngs of people towards him, gesturing for him to stay put with a wave of her hand that really can’t be mistaken for anything other than a greeting.

“Hey,” he says cautiously and lamely when she finally reaches him. Belatedly, he remembers to lower his arm. He is momentarily thankful that she doesn’t try to reach up for his face in the Mahanan greeting, although his goodwill evaporates when she leans in to inspect his bow, body thrumming with unexplainable anticipation.

“Oh, that’s pretty,” she says finally. Kyle can’t help himself from preening just a little, shifting his grip so that she can get a better look. After all, what was the point of spending all that money and materials if there was no one to excitedly show the end product off to? Besides, it’s been a while since they last saw each other. Last he heard, she had been traveling, keen to finally see the world on her own terms and at her own pace.

“It’s fresh off an upgrade,” he answers smugly. “Easier to handle than the Rex.”

“Slightly less intimidating though,” she chimes in, and Kyle bristles, not liking where this conversation is going. And true to form, she goes in for the kill: “Mizutsune? I recognize the plating.”

Kyle can feel the flush crawling up to his ears. Logically, he knows that there’s nothing for him to be embarrassed about. It’s a mark of good smithing that one can tell at a glance which monster a weapon was inspired by, and a Mizutsune was both powerful and extremely iconic. This bow in particular had good stats and the ability to fire rapidly, which admittedly took him some time to get used to after focusing mostly on piercing shots. The paralysis coating that works so well on this bow has also already saved his skin on more than one occasion. There is little more a career Hunter can ask for out of his weapon. It’s not like he’d been heading out to Pomore Garden at any given opportunity and holding onto an increasing multitude of Mizutsune materials just because he wanted some physical reminder of what was probably the most pivotal moment of his life, something that never failed to put a very complicated and jumbled mess of emotions deep within his chest whenever he thought back to it.

He’s starting to feel very, very hot under his collar. The sun is terrible. He resolves that his next big hunt really needs to be somewhere outside of Lamure.

His friend, however, just looks more and more baffled as he launches into an unprompted defense of his newest purchase. Every time she opens her mouth, Kyle talks a little faster. Eventually, she doesn’t even bother trying to interject, which is arguably worse, because instead she just looks progressively more and more thoughtful. Kyle wished desperately for Tsukino to peel away from whatever hidey hole she was tucked in. Then, his train of thought screeches into a rude and abrupt halt.

“What,” he croaks. “What are you doing.”

One of her brows quirks up. “I sure hope your eyes are still working because that’d be a detriment to your job,” she says plainly. “What does it look like I’m doing? I promise it’s not a trick question.”

What she’s doing is holding Kyle’s hand—the one not clutching his new bow—the one that had apparently been waving about with increasing agitation as he jabbered on and on. What Kyle doesn’t understand is why. It’s not like he just did some impressive shot to give them the edge in a battle or anything else that was cool and hand-holding worthy. He’d just been yammering about bow mechanics, and maybe embarrassingly dipping into his talisman hopes and dreams. He stares a little helplessly at his trapped hand. Her kinship stone winks up at him.

“Look,” she says patiently, when it becomes very clear that Kyle is going to need a moment before he can get his brain back online. “There’s nothing wrong with a bow made from Mizutsune parts and I am the last person who will ever turn down pretty things. What I was going to say was that this is an interesting departure from your whole—” She pauses, as though looking for a specific word. “Well, your whole image as a very grown-up and serious and intimidating Hunter or whatever it was you were trying to convey with that scowl you used to like so much. And you weren’t letting me get a single word in.”

“You’re getting plenty of words in now,” Kyle scowls, just to be contrary. “And I’ve grown since then.”

“Someone’s in a mood today.” She smiles, crinkle-eyed, up at him. Kyle very seriously debates wrenching his hand out of her hold like he did the last time this happened and then pointedly doesn’t act on the impulse.

“Why’re you in Lulucion?” he asks instead with a truly remarkable level of self-restraint. “Thought you’d never want to come back again after what happened.”

She shrugs, the greatsword on her back heaving with the movement. “Guess I’ve grown too,” she says loftily, though she sobers quickly. “I was actually visiting my grandfather. He used to go back to Mahana around this time of year… he can’t do it anymore of course but I’ve got Ratha now, so I figured I could do it instead. And then I figured I’d stop by Rutoh before going home, to see Ena and Alwin and wheedle a few more stories out of them.”

She lets go of Kyle’s hand. He tries not to miss it. “Even Ratha can’t make the trip in one go, and Lulucion was closest, so we’re stopping to rest. I dropped by the Scrivener’s Lodge earlier because I was hoping Reverto could give me a few weapon pointers as I’ve saved up just about enough for an upgrade, but they told me that he was out on an urgent mission and wouldn’t be back for a while.”

“Oh,” Kyle says, a little stung that she hadn’t come specifically to see him first, out of all the Hunters in the city. He’s slightly mollified when she grins at him, though.

“And then I met Tsukino by the cannons. She said I could find you here, so here I am.”

“I don’t know anything about greatswords,” Kyle blurts out, and immediately wants to kick himself. She blinks at him, and then bursts into laughter.

“I was just going to ask the smith,” she wheezes when she’s got herself somewhat back under control. “Can’t I see a friend just to say hi to him anymore?” Kyle stares very intently down at some of the finer detailing on his bow.

“Where is my Palico anyway?” he finally settles on, falling into a tried and true grumble. “I haven’t seen her all day.”

She waves her hand vaguely in the air. “Navirou said something about getting donuts. I wasn’t really listening.”

But there was a donut stand right here in the marketplace, Kyle wanted to cry out. He should have seen Tsukino by now if they’d really been going to buy snacks! And how was it possible that he had missed Navirou in his entirety, between the Felyne’s penchant for wearing ridiculous little outfits and his inability to shut up?

“Why? You have a hunt you need to run off to?”

“Yes,” Kyle says hotly. It’s a lie. He’d accepted a subquest that wouldn’t depart until later that evening for the sole purpose of testing out his new weapon in a relatively stress-free environment. Before that, he’d just planned on hitting up the shooting range in the training arena to break in the new string. His schedule was very, very free. Tsukino was perfectly aware of that.

His eyes widened. Tsukino had been with him on every excursion into the Gardens. She went where he did (usually), and it’s not like Kyle would ever begrudge her a visit home. But she’d been with him every step of every single Mizutsune job he’d ever taken—had watched him craft traps when he needed to capture and had kept watch for opportunists hoping to sneak up as he’d carved. She’d been the one who’d recommended the spinner for all the excess purplefur he was ending up with. At first, he’d simply thought that she’d wanted the thread to mend some of her own items, or to send back home to her brethren, but instead she’d tucked each skein of vibrant, silk-soft thread into the bottom of his pouch with gentle paws, cryptically talking about how strong a material it was, and how nice it looked when woven. Kyle has never touched a loom in his life, but now he’s looking at someone who he definitely knows has.

His stomach drops. Hadn’t Tsukino looked particularly smug ever since he’d lingered on the blueprints for Blessed Rain after getting a look at its stats and required materials?

“She got me,” he groans. His friend just looks at him bemusedly, though perhaps with a touch of wariness at his ferocious frown. Hastily, he tacks on: “It’s nothing. I, uh—I just remembered that I needed to tell Tsukino something. Important. Later, when I find her again.”

“Alright,” she says, though she doesn’t quite look like she believes him. “A quest’s a quest, though, so I won’t keep you here. The bow really is pretty though. I know I just said it doesn’t match your image and all but I really don’t think you can go wrong with something you like. You’ve got the skills for it, anyway.”

“Thanks,” he croaks, feeling a little overwhelmed. He manages two whole steps out of the nook before he pauses, worrying at his lower lip. “Actually,” he says sharply, spinning around on his heel and nearly causing his friend to startle right into a spice display. “How long are you staying for?”

“However long it’ll take to upgrade my sword, I guess,” she says after she collects herself, the words lilting into a question. “Three days or so, I guess?” She skirts nervously away from the glaring vendor, careful not to overbalance on her greatsword.

“Cool,” Kyle says with a nod, steeling himself. “Great, even. Look, how about this. Your last visit to Lulucion was terrible—” an understatement, “—so when I get back from my hunt I’ll show you some of the better sights Lulucion has to offer. There’s a hole in the wall that I think you’ll like. Dad used to take me after hunts—they grill really nice queen shrimp. And the parapets—you can climb them, and they’ve got all these little carvings in the stone that you can search for like a scavenger hunt.” He’s keenly aware that he’s rambling again, but she looks interested, so he barrels on. “I’ll come pick you up tomorrow just as soon as I can get a nap in. We can stay in the city or take Ratha out to the Barrens, down by the water. Just make a day of it.” He’s pretty certain that he looks at her with something akin to hope as she considers. It feels like a lifetime before she finally comes to a decision.

“I want to take Ratha out in the evening,” she says finally. “I don’t want him to be cooped up too long here ever again.”

“Yeah,” Kyle breathes out, the word rushing out of him in a flood of relief. “Yeah, I can work around that.” She beams at him.

“I’ll look forward to it,” she says, sincere and looking more than a little surprised despite herself at the prospect of looking forward to doing anything in Lulucion. “I’m staying at the inn closest to the stables. Pretty sure I’m the only Rider there currently so they’ll know who I am.” Kyle nods, and lets himself get his hand squeezed again, though not without her hands first hovering in an instinctual bid for his cheeks before she remembers herself.

“Good luck on your hunt. If I see Tsukino I’ll let her know you’re looking for her.”

“She’ll show up in due time,” he mutters darkly. “I’ll let you know if Reverto gets back early or if he’s just been loafing around this entire time. For your next upgrade or whatever.” She laughs, bright, and then slips off into the crowd to wrestle her way into the smithy’s queue. Kyle is left staring in her wake before his gaze is drawn back down to his bow.

“This is all your fault,” he tells it. Predictably, it doesn’t answer. Also predictably, Tsukino takes that exact moment to drop down from seemingly nowhere.

“I didn’t know we had another job lined up,” the Felyne says delicately, carefully brushing crumbs off of her coat. Kyle groans, sheathing his weapon.

“Don’t tease me,” he huffs. “I’m going to the shooting range. Are you coming?”

“Hmm,” says Tsukino. “I suppose I can spare the time.”

“Of course you can spare the time!” Kyle hisses, indignant. “You just spent the day eating donuts and eavesdropping!” He pointedly doesn’t look towards the smithy, where his friend was patiently browsing the display while another Hunter was getting their hammer looked at.

“One must always be prepared with the latest intel,” Tsukino says mildly. “I’m glad the upgrade went well.”

“It’s got good stats,” Kyle protests weakly in what is quickly becoming a tired argument. “The rapid shots have been going very well. And I had a surplus of Mizutsune parts.”

“Yes,” his hunting partner agrees readily enough. “Have you thought of what you’re going to do with the thread?”

“This conversation is finished,” Kyle says abruptly, making a very determined push towards the market’s exit. “Either come or don’t, so long as we meet at the gate for tonight’s hunt.”

Tsukino looks at him with exasperated fondness, which is frankly a little insulting, but readily falls into step next to him. Kyle wonders how many rounds he’s going to have to shoot in order to clear his head again and rid it of thoughts of Hazepetal Garden or Mizutsune or high-grade thread that he’ll never use himself. He’ll examine them again someday—because he’s not a coward—but that day is most certainly not today.

He does his rounds in the training arena and marvels at the way the string slides off his fingers with a satisfying twang, even though it’ll still be a good few days before it’s fully broken in to his liking. Tsukino’s saved him a donut, the cakey sweet sticky with honey and practically melting in his mouth. He’s got some free time even after stocking up for the evening hunt, so he takes a few minutes to browse the quest board, taking careful note of the jobs that were situated near the Harzgai Rocky Hill, or the ones from further afield in Alcala that’ll take him closer to Rutoh. And when he leaves the city, he pointedly doesn’t look up at the familiar shape circling in the dusky sky, even as he knows that they’ll surely see the last rays of the setting sun winking off of the plates of his bow like a beacon.

#was anyone going to tell me that HR Kyle gets a MIZU BOW #You were just going to withhold this vital piece of information from me?#anyway here's 3k words about the significance of Mizutsune to one (1) boy that I love #I wrote this specifically with my idiot in mind #but asides from the gender and a few other lines I guess you can generalize to any other Rider #monster hunter kyle #monster hunter stories 2 #Annie writes

63 notes · View notes

ot3 · 2 years

Note

I played Disco Elysium on your recommendation and I loved it. I want to hear a few of your takes on it if you don't mind sharing

im so glad anon... oh man disco elysum is almost hard for me to talk about because theres so much there and it's all so good and i feel like i barely scratched the surface of it all on my first playthrough...

i guess i think one of the things that really stuck me about it is that it's media about mental illness that takes place in that sort of shaky stage between realizing things are absolutely shit and actually doing any healing. like everything about disco elysium - the interpersonal stuff, the mental illness and addiction, the political landscape - is at that sort of point where things are Bad and maybe they can get good again but it's going to be a vicious uphill battle and in fact there will be times when you simply can't win.

disco elysium does not end with much of anything improved in a vastly significant manner. there is no revolution. but there is a miracle. there isn't healing, but there's progress. one case was solved. one man seems to be getting his life back on track. plenty of others who he met along the way will have a little something better going for them now. other than that, things continue as they always did. it's desolate but not without hope. it says 'the grand scheme of this world is shit right now and we can't change that' but still makes it very clear that there is something worthwhile in the small acts of resilience against this great tragedy.

disco elysium takes place in a world thats being consumed - the very fabric of reality is in its downswing. but a downswing as disco elysium presents it isn't the end, it's just an inevitability of the march of time. after life, death; after death, life again. After the world, the pale; after the pale, the world again.

i find a lot of media that deals heavily with themes of mental illness to either be on one end far too cloying or on the other far too saccharine. i don't want to Wallow, but i don't want to be kind to myself either. i have been working on things for a long time but i am not healing. it's just progress.

and i guess that's really what resonated with disco elysium the most. the fact that some things are unfixably bad, but for better or worse nothing is permanent and for better or worse you are still capable of action. at least thats how i see a lot of it.

#disco elysium spoilers

42 notes · View notes

fairykimseok · 3 years

Text

Drowsy nights and the white wolf

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Original Character (Kaitlyn)

Summary: Being an avenger is one thing, being an Avenger with Bucky Barnes is another. A little story of how Kaitlyn met Bucky

Gender: would say fluff with a little action, oneshot

Warnings: a mention of blood

This is written with the intention of being Bucky x reader but I just had to name the character. Time wise it is set along the events of TFATWS

Disclaimer: Marvel owns Avengers, The Falcon and The Winter Soldier and all its characters

Before I tell you my story maybe I need to introduce myself. My name is Kaitlyn, I am short of special as my mom liked to say and…I might be an Avenger.

All started in the battle of New York, I was in one of the buildings Loki had taken over, with my mom and a few other people. I don’t really remember what happened, I only know Loki had touched me with his Scepter. I woke up the following day at the hospital, the building we were in had collapsed killing everyone but me. I was 16 back then and that was when I first met Natasha. She was the one who had pulled me out of that building and she kept visiting me in the hospital, she sort of became my family when everyone was gone. Short after when my powers started showing up, powers that were the legacy of Loki and the infinity stone, our sessions started. She would train me in hand in hand combat and I would try to master my powers.

She wanted me to go to the avengers’ compound and I had visited a few times, I had a room next to Wanda whom I had met on a few occasions. But that was when the Civil War between the Avengers started, and Nat went hiding. We would still meet sometimes with Cap and occasionally Sam.

And then the snap happened, and I blipped and when I came back, she was gone. My only family was gone. I called Sam as soon as I found out. He told me I could still join the team just as Nat wanted, that they had a new building as the old one was destroyed.

And that is where I am right now, in the new Avengers compound with whom is left here. Mostly me, Rodney, and Banner. Sam comes and goes, Dr. Strange, Clint, and Scot has stopped by sometimes and they frequently video call with others that are far away.

It is sort of lonely here, but I try to focus on my training. It is not easy being the only one with my kind of powers. Dr. Strange has helped me some with that and Banner had run some tests on me to see how they could progress. I get my “military” training with Rodney and when Clint is here, I get the “spy” training.

Oh right, my powers. Well you could say I have a thing with ice. Provided that there is water around I can create ice in whatever form I want and use it accordingly. I am still very sloppy and most of the time it is only a thin layer, but I am getting better.

It was a typical day, I woke up, got breakfast in the shared kitchen, visited Banner in his lab and went to the gym for my training. One of the first things Nat had told me was that I need to be agile, to be able to move fast even in the most difficult situations, so my morning routine had a variety of ballet, yoga or pilates.

“Looking good”, I heard someone at the door. As I turned, I realized it was no other than Sam.

“Hey Sam, what’s up? It’s been a while”, I said, going to my bug to drink some water.

“Thought I would stop by to see how you all here are and also to drop a friend who I think would help you a lot with your training”, he said.

As on cue Rodney entered the room with one more man, he looked around the room before his eyes landed on me. I knew who he was of course, who doesn’t.

“Bucky this is Kaitlyn, Kaitlyn this is Bucky. Don’t worry he is not dangerous just very old”, Sam joked which led to him getting a punch in the arm.

“Nice to me you”, Bucky said with a slight nod of his head.

“Nice to meet you too”, I managed to say in a stake of a mild shock. No, I wasn’t scared of him, I never had been. Cap had told me enough of his stories with bucky back in their days to know that this man is not dangerous even if he had been brainwashed most of his life.

“Bucky can help you with close up combat. If you are going to learn, better learn from the best.”, Sam offered. “We gonna let you at it and come back later with Rods. You gonna be ok old man?”, he asked before leaving, closing the door behind them.

Bucky only eye rolled as he properly entered the room. He unzipped his jacket leaving it at the bench, his vibranium arm echoing in the empty room. “Alright, let’s see what you got. Try to hit me” he said positioning himself in the middle of the room.

“Hit you?”, I asked confused, approaching him.

“Kick me, punch me, hit me. Whatever”, he shrugged.

Whatever, I thought. How? How do you hit the winter soldier? I took a few more steps, going closer all while I was thinking which could be the best approach, how could I attack him. At first, I just tried to punch as naïve as it looked. Of course, he just stopped my hand midair with his. I tried more complex moves, some of those Nat used to do, wrapping my legs around his neck and trying to elbow him on the head, I found myself pinned to the nearest wall his metal arm in my neck. His grip tight. He got flustered for a moment and for a moment there I really saw the assassin he used to be. He loosened his grip and let me down, mumbling an apology.

“How old are you again?”, I asked out of breath.

“Physical or mental age? Actual or birth wise? Kinda difficult question to ask”, he said with a faint of smile but maybe it was my imagination because it lasted for too short.

“Current?”, I offered.

“Something around the early 30s. Or 106, who counts?” he shrugged. “Again”

We went on and on, each time finding me in a helpless situation. I was pretty sure Ι was covered with bruises in every place possible.

I don’t even know how many times we had done the same thing when I got the idea that hey, I got powers. I let him tackle me into a headlock and when he was about to loosen his hold, I touched the metal arm, ice spreading all over it. I took the mere seconds it took him to realize what was going on as a chance to elbow him in the ribs and punch his jaw. He took a step back and smiled not even fazed by my hits.

“Good, but next time count on your strength and not your powers yet”, he said.

“Do you even feel anything?”, I asked defeated, nothing seemed to hurt him.

“It takes a lot more to make me feel anything”, he grinned. “And ice is not one of them”

“I left you here to learn from him and you go and freeze my man?”, Sam exclaimed entering in the room.

“I am fine”, Bucky said waving his metal arm twice before the ice broke and fell on the floor.

“Once a popsicle always a popsicle,” Sam joked earning a death stare from the older man. “How did it go?”, he asked looking at me

“No broken bones, so I guess good”, I shrugged.

“We have a long way ahead of us”, Bucky said getting dressed. “I am out”, he nodded before disappearing.

“So how was it really?”, Sam asked again, examining me.

“I think I barely touched him. My whole body is sore, and my pride is wounded.”

Sam laughed. “That’s why I brought him here to you. The people we are going up against out there are not easy, they will try to kill you without a second thought. You can always use your powers, but you told Nat you wanted to be like her. If you still up for the close combat, he will be here from now on. You may train with him whenever you want. If not, you are still free to stay here and train on your powers.”

I looked at him with realization. Maybe I wasn’t trying hard enough. I was feeling so lost without her. “No, I want to try”, I promised with determination.

“Good. Now go, get ready we will all get dinner together before I leave”, Sam left too, and I was left alone in the room.

I sighed heavily, trying to get up I felt the pain running through my body. I was going to be so sore tomorrow.

-----------------------

Days were passing by and I hadn’t seen him anywhere which on one hand was good because I don’t think I had improved since our first encounter and on the other it made me wonder where the heck he might be? It is not like the compound is huge for me to lose him. I reasoned that he could be on a mission with Sam and that is why I hadn’t seen him, after all Rodney wasn’t here either.

Apart from the hours of training I did through the day, I had started running some laps in the late hours. It is when the humidity in the air is the highest here, so it makes me feel more at ease with my powers. I was running again today, just a few laps around the compound, when I stopped at a clean spot.

I breathed in the humid air allowing my body to absorb as much water as it could from the atmosphere. I tried to catch my breath as I heard a bike running down the entrance of the compound towards the building. For a moment, I was perplexed as who it could be before I realized it was him, returning from somewhere. He headed to the garage. I didn’t even know he had a bike, but I decided to return at my task no point on focusing on him.

I closed my eyes again, opened my arms in an L shape and tried to focus, focus on my surroundings, on the water in the air. I took a deep breath as I tried to expand the cold emanating from me. I tried to crystalize as many water particles as I could around me, turning the humid air into a frozen one.

And I tried to expand it as much as I could. That’s when I felt it, the other presence close to me, in between all the cold a warmer figure. I turned at once defensively, ice-like awls flying towards the direction of the intruder only to stop a few centimeters away.

“I am sorry”, I said as I made them disappear. “I didn’t know it was you”, my body relaxing a bit.

He stared at me unfazed, as if he wasn’t even scared, I had almost pierced him throughout his body. He stared at me dead in the eyes and I couldn’t really understand what his look meant. It was like he was studying me. “It’s late, you should better go in,” he said before turning and heading back to the building.

“How long have you been standing here?”, I yelled at his retreating figure.

“Enough,” he yelled back without even turning.

I followed him with my eyes until he disappeared behind the doors. I took another deep breath as I headed back myself. There was something about this man, so mysterious, so distant yet I felt being drawn to him.

--------------------

Wednesdays are usually gun days, I would do the training with Clint, trying different guns and basically learning how about anything could be a weapon if you use it correctly. Hell, one day Clint decided I had to try the bow, but it went terribly. In my defense my eyesight sucks so how was I supposed to do well?

Clint hadn’t been here for a while, so I went to the training room alone, picked a gun, set the target, wore the protective gear, and started shooting. Surprisingly I wasn’t that bad at shooting, I give myself credit, even though I still lack on technique and consistency.

I was halfway through when I felt eyes on me again. I turned to face the room and sure enough I saw him leaning on the door frame. “Not bad,” he commented as I removed the protective headphones.

“Thanks”, I said feeling self-aware, I don’t know why I was getting so nervous around him.

“Need to relax your shoulders a bit” he continued as he walked to pick a gun and went to a nearby booth. “You are going to dislocate it otherwise”.

I nodded as I watched him go, he didn’t miss one, switching between hands and meters away from the target. I was impressed but don’t tell him.

“So, guns are your thing”, I said as he stopped.

“I wouldn’t say I have a thing, just too many years of experience, but if I had a thing, I guess it would be knives”, he said thoughtfully.

“Show me”, I challenged without even thinking.

He gave me a funny look as he picked one, moved back to the booth and while still looking at me threw the knife head on to the target. He didn’t even blink.

He shrugged and I think I saw a hint of smugness there. “Practice makes perfect”, he said as he turned to leave the room. “Keep on practicing”.

“Good to see you too”, I mumbled to the empty room. Cause it was good to see him, wasn’t it? I did want to see him. I had found myself almost searching for him in the days that he was nowhere to be found. I had seen photos of him in the news and back in those years he did seem dangerous but now, with the haircut and his general stance he seemed more like the Bucky Cap was describing in his stories albeit still very distant. Would I entertain myself with the thought that he was hot? I mean, the beard, the toned muscles, the mystery, the eyes, oh those eyes. Nah, I shouldn’t think of that.

“Focus”, I murmured to myself as I started shooting again.

-------------------

I was back in the gym where we first met, doing my flexibility exercises as he entered the room. He walked straight to me, his eyes never leaving mine. I got up from the floor I was sitting. I was so drawn to him; I couldn’t take my eyes of him. We were too close now, bodies almost touching. He looked down on me and I felt my body shiver. He brought his hand to my cheek and caress it, and I melted to the touch. I raised mine to touch his hand as I followed the muscles all the away till his shoulder and then his face. He used his metal arm to guide me closer to him by my waist. And then he started leaning, our breaths coming as one, lips almost touching…

I woke up with a start, my heart racing a like an f1 car in Q3. I was sweating. “It was just a dream”, I said as I tried to catch my breath. “A very vivid one”.

I looked at the clock on the night stand it was still 3 in the morning, but my glass was empty. I got up, sighing, intending to go get some water from the kitchen. As I left my room, I heard some soft, almost incoherent, music coming from the end of the corridor. I walked towards it, recognized the tune as something from the 30s or 40s maybe, I turned at the end of the corridor and there was faint light coming from a crick of the door of the room in the right.

I wondered who could be up this late at night and I picked in the room. It was luminated by a small lamp on the desk. A pickup next to it and a few records stacked in the bookshelf behind. He then moved into my line of vision. Drink at hand, shirtless, only his bottom pajamas on. I gulped at the sight of his bare torso, not a good combination with the dream I just had. I noticed the scars on his body and those where the metal was fusing with his torso.

He was sipping his drink, occasionally humming to the tune. This must have been the most human I had ever seen him and then it hit me that this is a very private moment for someone like him, with the kind of life he had, and I was intruding. I turned to go to the kitchen as I originally intended, unbeknownst to me at the time that he had noticed my presence.

-------------------

“Your favoritism is showing”, Sam commented as he followed Bucky’s look.

It was one of those days that we had visitors in the compound. I was just outside the building on the front yard, with Hope and in the middle of the very tiring martial arts session.

Bucky was leaning of the living room windows that had just the perfect view of the front where me and Hope were.

“I don’t get what you mean,” Bucky said to Sam, his eyes still on us.

Sam laughed. “Come on don’t play dumb. It is not so subtle when you mention her while on missions neither how you look at her when she doesn’t.”

“How do I look at her?”, Bucky asked finally turning to look at Sam.

“Well, intently the least. There is some longing, some what if in there”, Sam explained.

“You know it’s true,” Rodney added coming into the room.

“Where the hell did you come from?” Bucky exclaimed finally leaving his spot from the window and sitting on the couch. Anyone could see he was started to get annoyed.

“You know if Steve was here, he would tell you to go for it”, Sam pointed.

Bucky glared at him before hissing “I hate you both”.

Sam laughed loudly.

-----------------

I had just finished my session with Hope when Sam approached us.

“How you doing ladies?” he chirped.

“Good”, Hope beamed, “It went pretty good”.

“That’s always great to hear”, Sam approved and they both smiled at me making me blush.

“I am gonna head back in”, Hope said, “Is Scot here yet?”

“Yeah he just came with Cassie. You all gonna stay here for lunch?” he wondered.

“Sure thing”, she nodded before heading in.

“So how is it going with you? How it’s going with my boy Bucky?” Sam asked shifting his attention back to me.

“Uuhm, good, I guess. We haven’t talked much but he has offered a few advices here and there which helped me for sure. I was pretty sure he hated me at the beginning”, I laughed.

“I am telling you he hates everyone, but I think it might be far from true in your case”, Sam winked. “But anyway, keep up the good work and who knows you might come with us in a mission soon.”

I looked at him perplexed but didn’t comment on it.

Later during lunch, I tried to pay more attention to Bucky and it did seem that he wasn’t so comfortable in a room full of people but I did notice that there were times he was looking at me for no reason.

-------------------

True to his words, Sam did invite me to a mission about a month after he said so. They were happy with my progress which gave me the confidence I needed to try more. There were still a lot I needed to learn, and they thought that if I was part of a simple mission it would also give me the experience of handling difficult situations.

I had a fitting with Banner who provided me with a suit, he had coordinated with Shuri for this. It was a black one with blue details, small lines in the shoulders, abdomen, and wrists. My palms and fingers were free so that I would be able to use my powers easily and of course it had parts of vibranium protecting the vital organs of my torso. The part I liked the most was the neck as there was extra fabric which I could use to cover my face up till my nose. I braided my hair in a French style, took the gun and in ear com that Sam had left for me and I was ready to go.

“Nervous?”, I heard Bucky asking me as he joined me at the front yard. We were waiting for Sam to come with the Quinjet and get us. He was also dressed in his suit, with an one-sleeved jacket, leaving his metal arm exposed.

“More than I would like to admit”, I replied.

“It will be fine, we got you”, he assured me.

Up in the Quinjet, I spend most of my time in awe with how it was. I had never been into one and I was marveled.

“So, the mission is to get to the convoy and get the asset out. The asset is a scientist. We plan on ambushing them based on the route they are supposed to follow. I will stop them, and we attack. Bucky and I will take care of the guards and all you need to do is take the guy and go away of the rest of us”, Sam started explaining the plan, showing a map on the screen. “If everything goes according to plan, we will be there way earlier to map the area. Clear?”

“Hmm, how are we going to go there? I wouldn’t assume there is a place to land there”, I pondered.

“Parachutes”, Sam simply offered, studying the map. “We plan on landing around here. And as soon as we get the asset, we have this place here as an exit point. Just a few km away.”

“For us, he would be flying”, Bucky accused him.

“Not wanting to be that person, but I have never used a parachute”, my stress levels were increasing by the second. Not only I was in charge of another person making it out alive, but I had to jump of a plane, not to mention my fear of heights. Maybe this was a bad idea.

“Don’t worry we will jump together”, Bucky offered which unknowingly to me earned a playful wiggle of eyebrows and a look of approval from Sam. Bucky on the other hand only glared at him.

When it was almost time for us to jump, we started getting ready. Sam left first, flying to the place to make sure we didn’t have any company. It was the first time I had seen him with Cap’s shield, and it was not as weird as I expected it to be.

“You ready?” I heard him ask.

“As ready as I can be”, I smiled nervously.

“Look it is your first time and it is reasonable to be nervous. But it won’t help you down there. You are ready just believe in yourself. We will be there, and we won’t let anything to happen to you. Ok?” he comforted me giving me a pat on the back. And there was something there in his eyes, a bit of worry, of determination, I couldn’t really tell but I believed him.

“Ok”, I said with confidence. “So how do we jump?”

“Well, since you have no experience, we will do this together. Here tie this in your belt and around your waist and clip it to my belt”, he proceeded with wearing the parachute and fixing the ties and held as together. This was the closest we had been since the first day that we trained together. I had made the mistake of looking up at him as he checked the equipment. We don’t have that much of height difference which has as a result my eyes to be at the same level with his lips. Which was a great distraction for my nervousness. “You can put your hand here to be steadier”, he said as he guided my hand to get in between the ties of the parachute at the front of his chest. “And the other should probably go behind my back”, he suggested.

“Ok”, I said as I did what he proposed. I did feel steady like this, but it was super close. I could smell his cologne from this distance.

He took a step behind and an agent opened the airplane door for us. “Want to count to 3?”, he asked, wrapping his hand around my waist holding me closed.

I did make the mistake to look at him in the eyes which created a new kind of tension, but I nodded. “One..Two….AAAAAAhh”, I screamed as the jerk jumped of the plane without a notice. I hid my face in the crook of his neck as we were falling, letting him take care of the rest. The one instruction they had given me was to stay as still as I could so that he could guide as without problems.

And somehow miraculously I felt my feet touching the ground and him starting to untie as from the parachute. “See we made it”, he remarked with a rare smile.

I let a loud breath. “I can’t believe we did. Now what?”

“Sam you copy? We are moving to the meet up point”, he talked to his in-ear com as he gestured me to follow.

“Copy”, I heard Sam replying.

We walked carefully to the place we were supposed to ambush them. Sam informed us that he could see the convoy coming. The asset being in the 3rd of the 4 cars.

We had positioned ourselves as we saw the cars turning towards our direction. As they were passing by us, Sam shoot the first one causing a collision and the rest came to a stop. “Go go go”, I heard him over the radio.

Sam was already flying towards our direction eliminating as many guards as he could. A lot more people than I expected came out of the vehicles. I saw Bucky running easily taking out the first 3-4 guards that came out of the last car as stealthy as possible. Sam threw him the shield and with a jump Bucky swiftly caught it and landed on top of the Jeep that was supposed to have the asset, starting to shoot.

I run behind him going to the other side of the car where I could see an man trying to hide. With the guards of the car gone I was able to take him “Follow me”, I shouted taking him by the shoulder and leading him to the forest in the direction of the exit point.

But as I turned to go that way, I saw another vehicle coming to us, probably a backup. They were driving fast directly at us. “We got company!”, I yelled in the com getting the others attention. I tried to shoot at the driver, but the windshield was bullet proof.

Sam flew past by and shoot at the tyres. Even though the van crashed to the side a bunch of guards came out and started shooting at us. “Kaitlyn, go!” Bucky yelled moving past me.

I took the asset and started running in the forest unfortunately though a few guards saw us and started following. The first bullet flew right past me and I stopped abruptly. “Get behind me”, I demanded as I tried to shield him. I created an ice shield as thick as I could to shield us both. The guards kept shooting as I tried to take steps backwards. I drew my gun and tried to shoot back getting one of them on the leg. My shield had started thinning as bullets kept coming to our direction. One passed through and I felt like it hit me, but I didn’t have the time to think of this.

I looked up on the trees to see how heavy they were with snow and I got an idea. I lifted my hand and closed my fist as the snow fell heavy on the guard. I lowered my shield to see if the danger had passed and thankfully there was no one else. Sam flew next to me and Bucky came behind running. “We are clear”, Sam confirmed. I looked back at the man hiding behind me, he wasn’t hurt which was the point so that meant I had done a good job.

We took him to the exit point where the Quinjet was waiting. I sat down at a sit to catch my breath. I had never used my powers for so long and I felt drained now the adrenaline levels were falling.

“You are bleeding”, Bucky exclaimed as he run towards me, kneeling in front of me and taking my arm in his. There was a hole in my suit, and there was a scratch on my upper arm I hadn’t even notice. There was some blood there, but it had mostly dried. “How did this happen?” he asked.

“Hmm, I am not sure I didn’t really feel it, but I think there was a bullet that passed the shield I had made”, I flinched into the touch.

“We need to clean this”, he answered with worry as he went to take the medical kit. He kneeled again and cleaned my wound, patching it.

“Thank you”, I whispered as he sat next to me. I took in his state, eyes closed, sweat dripping from his temple. There was something raw in him like this yet so beautiful.

“Good work Kaitlyn”, Sam patted me in the back. “We are proud of you”.

“Thanks Sam”, I smiled.

We left the asset to a safe place where some agency they didn’t care to tell me, would take him and put him into some kind of protection. We flew back to the compound.

“Are you staying?” I asked Sam.

“No, I got something to do. See you guys in a few days”, he waved before flying away.

I turned to look at Bucky “Come, let’s get in”, he responded.

I followed him in, each going to our respective rooms. I took a bath washing away the blood and tiredness. It was long into the am hours and I couldn’t get myself to sleep after all this. I headed back to the living room, gazing out at the night sky. A few stars visible.

“Here, I made you this”, Bucky said, and I jumped in shock.

“I didn’t hear you coming”, I faltered taking the mug he offered. It had some hot tea.

Bucky grinned. “It’s linden and chamomile. Will help soothing your nerves”.

“Thank you”, I smiled bringing the mug to my lips.

We stayed silently for a few moments, sipping our drinks, and looking out as night shifted.

“I am sorry I didn’t protect you”, he started.

I turned to look at him “Bucky, I- there is no need to be sorry. I…I didn’t expect you to. You had to fight so many people and protect yourself. I was just clumsy, and you were there the whole time. Hell, we jumped of a plane and walked out alive,” I laughed to show him that I was just fine.

“Still I told you that I wouldn’t let you get hurt and you did”, he countered meeting my eyes. There was dare I say hurt in there.

I took a step closer, taking his hand to mine, which took him by surprise, his eye fixating there for a moment. “Don’t worry, I am really fine. I am glad we are all ok”, I said squeezing his hand lightly.

He cleared his throat as he removed his hand. “It’s time for some sleep. Good night”, he said.

“Goodnight Bucky,” I responded as he turned to leave, and turned my attention back outside.

“Kaitlyn?”

“Yeah?”

“You can call me Buck”, he encouraged and with a small smile he left.

I was left standing there with my mouth open, not knowing what to do. Ι bit my lips not knowing how to handle the new emotion of excitement I was feeling for no apparent reason. I went to my room and slept a peaceful sleep.

----------------

There had been a month since our mission, I was still training daily, each day feeling more confident with my skills and powers.

Sam and Bucky were in another mission for almost a month now, we didn’t really have news of them. Last time we had checked they were in Prague. Ι was worried, I didn’t want to admit it to anyone else but I was listening to the news everyday wondering if they would be mentioned.

“Hey Bruce”, I greeted as I entered the lab. “How is it going?”

“Hey kiddo”, he greeted back, leaving whatever weird thing he was working on.

I walked around the lab indifferently, “Any news from the guys in the field?”

“I spoke with Sam yesterday, they somehow ended in Madripoor. I personally haven’t been there, but I hear it is an interesting place. They met Sharon in the way”.

“Who is Sharon?”, I perked up.

“Oh, you probably haven’t met her. I only met her once briefly a few years ago. She was a friend of Steve’s and an old agent of Shield”, he explained.

“I see”, I said thoughtful, for some reason the idea of a woman travelling with them in troublesome situations didn’t make me feel very at ease. I mean if she was a friend of Steve’s, was she also a friend of Bucky’s?

I tried to shake away any unwelcome thoughts that came to my mind.

“Thank you, Bruce. Want to try the new blasters?”, I asked trying to channel my energy to something else.

--------------------

It was a Saturday evening; it was raining, and it was relatively cold. I was in my room, listening to some music and absentmindedly looking out the window. My tea still warm in the mug.

I heard a knock on the door that shook me out of my trance. “Yes”.

“Hey”, I barely saw a head behind the semi closed door. “May I come in?”

“Please, come”, I smiled to the familiar face. “When did you return?”

He got in closing the door behind him. “Half an hour ago probably. I just wanted to check up on you”, Bucky said scratching the back of his neck.

“I am good”, I offered going closer, my eyes try to take all his features. “Is this a bruise? Were you hurt?” I tried to reach with my hand right below his eye where I could see some shades of purple and yellow, but he stopped me midair.

“Yeah but it is nothing. Don’t worry. I ‘ve been worse”, he gently lowered my hand not completely leaving it though as our fingertips were still touching.

“That doesn’t really make me feel better about it. Neither should you. You shouldn’t get hurt”, I shook my head in disagreement.

He snorted. “It’s nothing. Don’t worry”, he smiled and for moment I think – I THINK – my legs turned to jelly. A bit my bottom lip and his eyes darted there directly.

I opened my mouth to say something, but words weren’t really there.

“It’s late”, he said. “I ‘ll see you tomorrow”. He opened the door and left with a last smile.

---------------

A few days had passed, we had shared some training sessions. I had run into him in the kitchen a few times in the morning where I would go to make breakfast and he would usually drink coffee with Rodney before they both left for a meeting they did with the rest of the team that was spread around the world.

Sam stopped by occasionally and they could train together or go on a mission together. I was worried why they hadn’t asked me to go with them again. I had been to a few simple ones with Rodney but never again with Bucky and Sam.

That day, it was late at night and I had just come back from my evening run. I took a shower and after drying up I endeavored to the kitchen to find something to munch on. He was sitting at the living room, the only light coming from the full moon outside. Soft music was playing and he appeared to be playing with a knife. He was throwing it in the air and catching it again and again.

At first, I thought whether I should approach him or not, maybe he needed some alone time. I went to the kitchen and got some almonds and water. I thought that maybe he would hear the noise and either come or leave if he wanted to be alone. When I was done eating, I gave a look to the living room to see if he was still there.

Naturally my eyes went straight to the couch that I had left him but found nothing. Only then I noticed that he had moved to the windows and he was looking at me. I jumped “You scared me”, I muttered.

“What are you doing up at 3 in the morning?” he asked.

“Right back at you? I was just about to go to sleep”, I retorted getting away from the shadows of the kitchen and closer to the windows. The moon light was accentuating his features. He had a week-old beard and was wearing a simple black t-shirt and pj pants.

“Tried the sleep, didn’t work. Came here to relax”, he explained while still looking at me intently.

“Do you want me to make you something? A tea? Some milk?” I offered.

He moved from the windows and met me halfway. “No, I am fine”, he murmured. He brushed a few stray hairs with his hand and put them behind my ear. His eyes never leaving mine. “Didn’t really tell me why you were still up”.

“I – I came back from running and wanted to eat something before I go to sleep”, I could feel his breath merging with mine, and I was feeling so lost.

He brought his metal arm to my waist and with his other arm he caressed my cheek. Ι couldn’t but lean into the touch, momentarily closing my eyes.

He started leaning towards me when a noise came from down the corridor. Someone had opened their door and was making their way to us. He immediately broke contact, gave me one last look, and left. “Sup Banner?” heard him saying somewhere away from my line of vision. I was just left there, frozen, not knowing what to do and utterly confused.

“What are you doing in the dark kid?”, Bruce asked, and I almost jumped.

“Ah you know, night cravings. Going to sleep. Goodnight Bruce”, I faked a yawn and practically run to my room.

------------

The next day I intentionally went for breakfast later than usually. I wasn’t sure I wanted to see him yet neither did I know what to do if we met.

Of course, with the good luck I always have, I almost fell on him as I turned to enter the kitchen. He caught me as to not fall murmured an apology and left which as I saw from the kitchen, he rode his bike and left the compound whatsoever.

I spend the whole day in the training room unleashing all my nerves using my powers. At some point Bruce had to come to tell me to stop because the temperature in the compound had decreased by 10 degrees and apart from the room I was using, crystals had form in two rooms radius.

I apologized and we spend the rest of the afternoon trying to unfreeze the rooms and increase the temperature. Thankfully the compound has top notch systems.

I ate a quick dinner right after and locked myself in my room.

I was laying in my bed, cocooning with my blankets, watching a movie when I heard a knock on my door. I looked at the clock, it was almost midnight. “Who is it?”, I questioned.

“Bucky”, he cleaned his throat, the nervousness in his voice evident.

For a moment I pondered if I should really go and open or not but my curiosity and well the eagerness got the best of me. I got up and unlocked the door, opening it enough to see him. “Can I come in?”, he wondered, anxiously giving looks to the rest of the rooms in case anyone showed up. I just moved aside for him to get in without saying anything, wasn’t sure what to say either.

I moved to go and sit back on my bed and he followed but hesitated to sit, he only did when I gestured him to. He cleaned his throat again. “This isn’t easy for me”, he started and I then felt bad, because I was giving him the silent treatment but I was failing to understand that for a person like him, that had been through so many horrible things it surely wasn’t something easy. I relaxed a bit and gave him a reassuring look as to proceed.

He fidgeted a little more before he tried again. “Firstly, I need to apologize for how I left yesterday, I just panicked. You know it is funny because Steve had told me that I had my way with the ladies back in our time but all this”, he gestured between us, “is fairly new to the current me. And I pretty much have no idea what to say or do”.

“Well, thank you for apologizing”, I smiled and took his hand in mine to show him that everything was ok, and he could feel more comfortable. He clenched back which I took as a good step. “You can always start by telling me what you feel, if you want”.

“You would think that it is easy”, he snorted, yet he intertwined our fingers. “I just feel better when I see you and when I am with you. And I feel excited every time we meet. And I feel eager for the next time”.

“Well if it helps, I feel the same”, I mumbled.

His shoulders seemed to relax a bit to the sound of my words.

I lifted my arm and tried to turn his face gently to look at me or else he would make holes to the floor from how intently he was looking at it. I smiled and he grinned.

“So…”, I started.

“So, we could maybe try and spend some time together one of these days…”, he trailed off.

“Well, it is not like I have something to do now… we could always start with watching a movie?”, I questioned.

“Yeah I would like that”, he smiled.

We picked a movie and sat on the bed, at first apart but as the movie was progressing, in between laughs and comments, we came closer and ended up cuddling. I am not sure when but at some point, I fell asleep in his arms.

“Sshh, go back to sleep”, he whispered as he was trying to get up and leave the bed, my hand instinctively holding him in place.

“Don’t go”, I mumbled, eyes still close.

“I can’t stay here, and you are asleep”, he said, and I could hear the smile in his voice.

I opened my eyes, as awake I could be “Stay”

He looked me again, eyes full of adoration. I could see he was thinking of it. I sat up, and gently pulled him close to me so that he could sit back again in the bed. “Stay”, I repeated.

“Ok”, he said “I will”.

He moved to remove his sweater and close the lights and came back to the bed. I moved enough to make him space and he got under the blanket, the mattress moving under the extra weight. I looked down at him and a feeling of completion, of happiness filled me. I couldn’t believe that those blue eyes were staring back at me.

For a moment I wasn’t sure if I should do it, if I was overstepping but my eagerness took a hold of me. I leaned in, placing my hand above his heart, feeling it moving fast. He looked at me inviting, his hand moving to my cheek, guiding me closer. I stopped just centimeters away, our lips almost touching, to give him one last look, as if I was asking for the final permission. He closed the gaped and I felt the softest lips against mine.

After a moment we parted and he caressed my cheek. “Sleep now.”

I laughed at him but obeyed, getting back in position, my head on his chest as he wrapped his arm around me. And just like this we fell asleep.

--------------

After this night, Bucky was a totally different person. He was constantly smiling to me, hugging me with every chance he got, kissing me when he thought no one was looking. And in the compound, he was totally different, he would help me clean around, sing while he was doing chores.

Sure, there were also some bad days when he would wake up in his sleep screaming from the nightmares and I had to hold him in my arms and remind him that everything was in the past. That no one was here to hurt him and even if they tried, they would have to go through me first. After a while he would usually calm down, we would lay down again, he would put his head on my chest, and I would caress his hair. He, then, would fall asleep and I would let him sleep as late as he could even if he would be grumpy about it afterwards.

But everything felt so dreamy. And I would trade everything in the world for a smile of his.

#bucky barnes #Sebastian #sebastian stan #bucky barnes x original female character #tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier #bucky fic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader

56 notes · View notes

infinitecrime · 3 years

Text

Spoiler free TFATWS Episode 5 review:

Another very solid episode. A huge amount of pay off for many of the various subplots at play and a great progression of the overall story. Some conversations that really needed to be had were finally had and it was immensely satisfying. Other than a strong opening action sequence, this episode was mainly character and dialogue focussed, which I think is going to upset some of the fanboys, but for me it might have been the strongest episode yet.

Spoiler heavy review:

Writing/Plot:

The opening fight was fantastically choreographed and heart breaking in a lot of ways. The acting was noteworthy which is rare for a fight scene where people normally phone it in or we don’t really see much of their expressions because they’re stunt doubles. I’m glad this was the only real action this week - it felt nice to get a break and return to character and plot driven scenes.

Overall this episode was just really satisfying in terms of plot progression and pay off. We resolved Bucky’s beef with Wakanda, Zemo’s fate, Bucky and Sam not seeing eye to eye, Isaiah’s story, Sam’s issues with the shield, and closure for Lemar’s family. We’ve progressed Sam and Sarah’s money/boat issues and whatever the fuck Sharon and Batroc have going on. Next week we’re setting up to give Yori some closure and put an end to John and the Flagsmashers.

Even the Flagsmashers, who we barely saw, got more development than it seems they have for a while - we now know they are all in on criminal behaviour, are willing to kill, have a distinct target (the GRC), and a distinct goal (stop the Patch), and have a mini army to do it with.

The vibe of this episode was just... soft, which is surprising for a hyper masculine superhero bro show. The whole community coming together to help the Wilson’s and Bucky being inducted into the family was just so wholesome. Even the Isaiah scenes, heart wrenching as they were, would have been intercut with violent and graphic torture flashbacks under some other director, but Kari knew that the story was powerful and upsetting enough on it’s own.

Sam:

Sam and Sarah are just amazing. Really really hope we see her in future Marvel properties. It's so nice to see the perspective of someone so grounded in a world of wizards and shit. I love that he seems to tell her everything and values her advice just as much if not more than that of soldiers and superheroes.

Watching him grapple with Steve and Bucky’s expectations of him vs Isaiah’s expectations of him vs Sarah’s expectations of him vs his own wants and needs was very impactful, and in the end, he’s going to honour them all and pick up the shield, but on his own terms, as his own man, because he wants to, not because some old men told him to/not to.

Sam finally got some of those deeply emotional beats that I have been hoping for this whole time, which gives Anthony a chance to really flex his acting muscles. He’s great at subtlety but he really shines in this episode now the writing has allowed him to. Everything with Isaiah and the scene of him wiping blood off the shield was so raw.

Isaiah, who gets his own section this week:

God, his entire section was so powerful and well done. I’m so glad he came back and we got to learn more about his story and his situation. I’m so glad it was explicitly addressed what was done to him, why it was done, how it affects Sam and his perception of the shield, how it affected his family, and how he still carries all that trauma to this day. I’m so glad it was a one on one between them.

Carl Lumbly was absolutely fantastic and Anthony played off of him wonderfully. The injustice and pain is so stark in this scene. I would love to see more of him in the future but I also want him to be able to finally rest.

Isaiah did exactly what Steve did. Went against express orders to do the right thing and saved a group of POW's that the top brass had written off as expendable. In return, Steve got his fake Captain title made real, a fancy new shield, and was lauded as a hero. Isaiah was imprisoned, tortured, experimented on, and treated as a criminal. For the same. damn. thing.

I was perplexed in previous weeks about people condemning Bucky for not telling anyone about Isaiah, when doing so would have disturbed his well earned peace and put him in extreme danger. In this episode we get the confirmation that Bucky’s choice was right: Isaiah is legally dead and in hiding and the government don't know he's alive. He wants to be left alone ("Leave me dead, my name is buried") and that’s more important than what Sam wants or what you think Bucky should have done. It’s up to Isaiah; and Bucky (and later Sam) respected his wishes.

Bucky:

Ayo calling Bucky White Wolf, telling him to steer clear of Wakanda “for the moment” but not forever, and making Sam a vibranium Cap suit shows he’s fully forgiven. To be honest, they likely don’t have an extradition treaty with Germany so they actually never would have gotten their hands on Zemo if Bucky hadn’t broken him out, so they’re probably happier with him than they let on right now.

The Zemo-Bucky relationship and the grudging respect and understanding they have for each other is so interesting. I honestly don’t believe this is the last we’ll see of Zemo. He’s straddling the anti-hero/villain divide and he’s just so fascinating. Bucky getting his closure with Zemo and showing him that he isn’t the weapon Zemo treated him as was powerful, although I don’t think Zemo actually thought he would kill him. He knows that Bucky wasn’t corrupted by the serum, and even admitted as much.

Fighting John with the shield must have given him flashbacks to the helicarrier fight with Steve which can’t have been pleasant. The pure rage on his face at seeing the shield misused was clear here.

Seeing him helping the Wilson’s and being integrated into the community and the family in a way he hasn’t had since the Howling Commandos (and even then, they were at war) was just so, so sweet and wholesome. And his boat fixing skills corroborated my science nerd/mechanic Bucky headcanons.

Bucky and Sarah lightly flirting is very cute and I would like to see that relationship be developed more.

It was nice to see him explicitly apologise and recognise why Sam didn’t want the shield, as well as explaining why he reacted the way he did. I don’t understand the people saying it wasn’t good enough at all - it was a clear and sincere apology and completely proportional to the actual offence, which was not quite understanding a perspective that he wasn’t really equipped to immediately understand. He doesn’t need to beg or plead - just acknowledge his ignorance, say sorry, and improve, which he did. Sam was perfectly happy with it and accepted the apology, his gift, and his help on the boat. Drama over nothing as per usual amongst the Bucky antis.

I still wish they would be more explicit about Steve’s fate and how they both feel about it, but I liked the scene we got.

Other characters:

“You built me.” - Wyatt is extremely good at mining sympathy out of an otherwise unsympathetic character. As much as I hate him, I did feel for him in the courthouse scene and with Lemar’s parents. He's an example of the veterans that are exploited until they crack then left in the dust as damaged goods when they do. I’ve been so, so impressed with Wyatt and the nuance and complexity and sympathy he’s managed to inject into the character. In anyone else’s hands he would be a two dimensional power crazed villain, but in Wyatt’s he’s a lot more than that.

Val is intriguing. Skrull? HYDRA? Power Broker? Something new entirely?

I wish John’s wife got a name. This is the second love interest minor female character (after the bartender) without an onscreen name, unless I missed it.

I am still somewhat perplexed by Sharon. Is she a double agent? A triple agent? Is she the Power Broker? Is she against the Flagsmashers, or with them, or only out for herself and against everyone? I’m not sure how this can all be resolved in only one episode but I guess we’ll find out. I wonder if she’s being set up for a future project. Is she a Skrull?

I knew Batroc would be back when we didn’t explicitly see him die - is he being used by Sharon without his knowledge for some other purpose, or does she genuinely not give a fuck if he kills Sam?

Nice to see Torres and to see that he has an obvious crush on both Sam AND Bucky. He’s for sure swooping into the final battle next episode having fixed Sam’s wings.

Is the inclusion of Eli Bradley setting him up for a future Young Avengers series, or is he just a nice comic cameo and nothing more?

Lemar's parents had me tearing up. Fuck Walker for lying to them but at least he gave them some closure I guess? Poor Lemar. He deserved so much more and we deserved more of him.

Fuck John Walker and his fake shield.

#tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier #tfatws spoilers #tfatws meta #a day late because yesterday was a mess #but lots of thoughts on this one

35 notes · View notes

chocolateslatte · 4 years

Text

🚨The Rise of Skywalker Detailed Review and Spoilers Ahead🚨

George Lucas: “If the boy and girl walk off into the sunset hand-in-hand in the last scene, it adds 10 million to the box office”

The “fairytale” we got: A long long time ago in a galaxy far far away, there was a curse of pain and death in a family that just went on and on. They were never able to break it and they all die, the end.

Well, you did it JJ, you little punk...you ruined 40 years of cinema. Kids are coming out of theatres crying, they can’t understand. I guess this was the “fun and hopeful ending” you were speaking of during the press tours. Are you on crack or something, or just sadistic....why would you promote it like that!? Did you forget Star Wars at its core is a story of hope, light, a fairytale in space for children? They did it...they united Reylo’s and Fanboys through hate.

JJ you do realize tragical romances are only tragically romantic if there was romantic buildup? Romeo and Juliet married in secret, Anidala did as well and flirted in the fields. How was this supposed to be satisfying? A five-second beginning, middle, and end. How this went through multiple execs is beyond me.... I would have understood if Reylo was Rian’s creation. BUT JJ LITERALLY was the one who told Rian to go forth with it...he created Reylo so you can’t say the last Jedi derailed things on that front. JJ wasn’t brave enough for his own vision. This movie was like “the crimes of Grindlewald”, a lot of stuff happening that made me feel nothing.

Okay, first things first. The OG trilogy was necessary, the prequels were necessary to set up that Vader did not start off bad. What was necessary about the sequels? They just dismantled everything the Skywalker family worked for. Why did we have to see ALL of our favorite characters die? Was the aim that a villain can only be redeemed through death? How original. I’m convinced what they were planning for since force awakens was a journey from villain to hero...but instead we got this a 10min redemption resulting in death a la Vader. Why call Adam Driver’s character a “Disney Prince”?When did Happy endings become so controversial? We go to the movies to feel hope, to escape reality...George Lucas understood that. JJ’s trilogy is uninspired, bland and contributes nothing to the saga. JJ went as far as to recon his own “The Force Awakens”.It had the chance to define generations but no. Literal and utter garbage. Rian made some odd choices but he was bold, unafraid and had the vision. HE knew emotion was at the heart of Star Wars.

WHERE DID THE SKYWALKERS RISE? MORE LIKE RISE OF PALPATINE, HE BLOODY WON

BUT my problem is not with the ending, it’s the bloody entire movie. This movie made me realize that it's not Reylo that I am a fan of, it was Ben, Leia, Han, Ani, Padme, and all those other characters. I’m upset because this movie is not my Star Wars: of family, love and above all else hope. This is just a 2.5-hour video game with no emotions. This trilogy was all angst with NO payoff.

Okay, you will never ever convince me Palpatine was planned the whole time. This whole movie was retcon for the Last Jedi that pissed off the fanboys. Lucas films did not have an outline for the three films and Rian derailed whatever they wanted to do....except they didn’t even tell him what they wanted! This should be a cautionary tale of why you need to plan. Kylo ain’t bad, Snoke is gone....well pull out Palpatine I guess. This whole film is JJ’s mad scrambling. Alright, I will humor you, tell me how Palpatine came back when he fell down a shaft and exploded....not *boom boom because of force*. The force in this movie is not canon George Lucas force, it’s just an easy out whenever JJ wants one.

1. Opening Crawl: As soon as I saw this I knew all the leaks were true, I wanted to bolt from the theatre. When I saw them in August I laughed cause it was so ridiculous it couldn’t be true. How could Disney let a whole movie leak? The plot seemed like a bad fan-fiction. Actually, fanfics are way more true to lore. Anyway, so Palpatine “announces” that he’s back. Is this the shrewd Chancellor Palpatine we know? Certainly, not...why in the world would he announce it rather than keep on the DL and just attack. Yo Palps ain’t this dumb why would you let them (the resistance) prepare?? Because of plot...well okay.

2. Did Last Jedi even happen: this film is the sequel to the force awakens, like TLJ never happened...except it’s acting like there was some movie in between that JJ made. Okay, so why is Kylo trying to run Rey over with his tie fighter...he doesn’t really want to kill her. It’s just meaningless action shots. And don’t get me started on exposition, the dialogue: “hey look its the Knights of Ren”. Except they do nothing. Cool cool. Kylo’s character goes back to Force awakens era like no development had occurred...except he’s not even there he’s just messing around not even being a real villain. JJ’s specialty is set-up and he does this beautifully....but he can not wrap up and follow through.

3. Rose Tico: yup last Jedi never happened, she has nothing to do. She and Finn are irrelevant. Finn has reverted to being obsessed with Rey. Cool Cool. I honestly feel so bad for the lovely Kelly Marie Tran. How did you relegate a relatively big character into the sidelines?? Why introduce two new characters this late. Rose could have filmed in for them...but alas we must snub Rian at every turn because that’s just how petty JJ Abrams is. ( don’t get me wrong Jannah was cool)

4. The Rise Of Poe Dameron: Finn has been relegated to a side character who does nothing and just yells “REY!”. It was a great setup, a stormtrooper who was force sensitive but doesn’t want his life to be fighting for nothing. You could have explored trauma, the discovery of the light but nope nada. Tell me the point of his character journey. So flat and static. And with Jannah and the ex stormtroopers they could have gone with the arc of these lost, sad kids coming together to find family.

5. Leia: Okay you’re telling me our Princess would give up on her son before he was born, just throw away her lightsaber and accept Ben’s fate? Cool alright. And she knew about Rey Palpatine and didn’t say anything...my princess would never.

6. Mary Sue Rey: Ahh Rey this girl feels no emotion in this movie...just like the audience. Sure she’s trained but she can just do stuff with the “force” that even Jedi masters can’t. Stopping a whole starship, something even Yoda could barely do...yup she can do it. Beat Kylo all the time except one, yup she can. Manipulate the force in mind-boggling ways, heal people...sure Luke couldn’t but Rey certainly can. Cause she is the chosen one...hell even Ani wasn’t this talented and he had years of training. Poe and Finn have a genuine connection, Rey just seems disjointed (totally understandable why)...but if so the ending is even worse. She doesn’t even find peace with her friends. She’s not realistic and human like Luke and Leia were.

Force sensitivity in the galaxy: What a perfect setup, the boy with the broom at the end of TLJ that was force sensitive. The message is that the power to use the force was spreading through the galaxy. No longer confined to the elite. People were hearing of Luke’s battle of Crate and rising.

7. Kylo/Ben: I still maintain that he, other than Ani was the most nuanced character in the whole saga. His arc from Force Awakens to Last Jedi had progressed. How great that even someone from the legendary line of skywalker and solo could fall to the dark again. He wasn’t flat, he was a tortured boy that was conflicted since the first movie. How great would it have been to see him as a conflicted supreme leader, which was set up in TLJ. But *gasps* a plot of his very own, no can do, this is the nature of JJ’s crush on Rey and Daisy.

Disney released comics that made us sympathize with him, to see that all along he was manipulated by Snoke, and Palpatine the voices in his head. Neglected by those who were supposed to love him. Adam Driver was cast perfectly, he had almost no lines that weren’t related to Rey’s charcater arc. If he were a woman I’m sure everyone would be offended. That single line’s delivery “Dad-”

Come on Poe had more lines than him, and Driver according to JJ was half of the protagonist. He was pitched an arc opposite that of Darth Vader that’s why he signed. Man JJ really did do everyone dirty.

8. Ben had no lines while redeemed other than “ow”...I am so sorry ADAM that this nasty ass JJ did this to you...this part was 100% improv by Adam, I am willing to bet my life on it. You know why “ow” was brilliant? Cause it meant he felt pain and emotion, he was no longer hiding behind the hardness of Kylo REN. Adam’s performance as Ben left me speechless, he was convincing as Kylo, intimidating...but as BEN he shines in the way only Solo’s can. The way his eyes become determined once he accepts he must give his life, and he does so happily for the love of his life. His soulmate. Star Wars and JJ never deserved the talent that is Adam Driver.

9. They are supposed to be equals in the force yet they missed the opportunity to fight Snoke together. Tell me how they are equals. He existed only to further Rey’s plotline.

Oh and the other Jedi including Anakin whisper and help Rey...when his own grandson has been asking for help in distress for like 30years. Nice real nice.

10. Finally Reylo: it felt unearned cause there was no buildup, JJ just threw it in for kicks forgetting all the P&P parallels he was shooting for. An afterthought. Driver and Ridley’s acting saved the day, they had no lines. Adam Driver is truly one of the finest actors. You could see the difference between Ben and Kylo in his subtle gestures...the sass was pure Han Solo.

11. And then the death: I wouldn’t even say we won, but at what cost. We won in no way. Had he died fighting I would have understood, but this death was so unnecessary and put in just for the fanboys. Let me say again I would have been okay with death had it been justified. How is this any different than Vader x Luke. JJ can only copy not create. How crazy that you can just bring people back from the dead...Anakin is here like, am I joke to you? I could have brought Padme back say what???? What was the point of his whole fall to the dark. The force is infinite, that’s the whole point...once you know how to use it you can’t run out of it like juice. Oh, and Ben did not become one with Rey but rather the Force according to the Disney website. So why pray tell did he not appear as a force ghost? I’m convinced JJ was on crack.

12. No Mourning BEN no acknowledgment: 5 seconds! And then she moves on from losing her soulmate, half of her soul. She loses it over Chewie but nothing, no emotion not even a second over her other half. Seriously? No one ever knows Ben came back...nada. JJ set up Reylo, time and time again he has said that he crafted the story around the romance. He was left scrambling after Last Jedi and this was a last-ditch shock ending. No Reylo theme song, no across the stars

13. Last Jedi told us you don’t have to come from a powerful family to be important. THE WHOLE thing was that you could be force-sensitive and be a nobody. Nobodies can become somebody. A Hero is not born but made. The force lives in all beings, not just powerful families. It inspired me, what a great message to young guys and gals. Kylo’s line, “you come from nothing, you are nothing...you have no place in this story” finally turns out true. You have to come from something to have a part in the Star Wars story. And Rey had darkness inside her cause she was human. Because none of us are pure, we are shades of grey. But no, it’s cause darkness only runs in families. In the Last Jedi when she wants to see her family all she sees is herself and a shadow (Ben) who joins with her. Please do explain this JJ. And if this granddaughter thing was set up I would have had no problem...but they pulled it from their asses. You can have nothing but mean something. But no pander to the fanboys. In the end, a Palpatine lived and all the skywalkers ended....and we are supposed to have hope. Palpatine really did win.

14. Rey’s biggest fear was ending up in the desert alone, we were told “the belonging she seeks is ahead not behind” and “there’s someone who could still come back”. They mentioned she felt just as alone with the resistance. Only the other half of her soul understood her. This is truly tragic and sad...I am so heartbroken for her. And don’t tell me she isn’t there to stay...the soundtrack is called “a new home”. Enjoy the rest of your days being exactly where you started Rey....but hey at least you got a droid boo. I’m convinced this is not the balance JJ envisioned in the first movie. At one point in TFA Rey looks up sees an old woman alone, scavenging in the desert. This rattles her to the core and it starts her journey of wanting a better, different life. I am so sorry Rey. Okay so you may say she has the resistance and her friends...but let’s consult the last Jedi. In the end when everyone is on the ship...Rey is surrounded by friends yet looks more alone than ever. No one but Ben, maybe Luke, Leia, and Han understood her pull to the dark.

How sad that these two hopeless souls who had never known a moment of belonging and true love, found it for all but a few seconds.

I will quote: “preventing female characters with strong, compelling narratives from experiencing love, intimacy, and affection is just as regressive as reducing them down to sexual accessories. Assumes that women must choose between a romantic interest and depth of character”

Men really can not write good female characters, can they? A woman really can’t be a badass and end up with the love of her life

15. The Skywalker’s and Redemption: How truly truly sad that Han and Leia gave their life for their son who also died at a young age. ALL the Skywalkers and Solo’s have a tragic end. This is not what George Lucas wanted. What a tragic way to end this saga...they weren't able to break the curse. AND to all those troubled kids out there that lashed out and made terrible mistakes in their youth....doesn’t matter what you do dying is the only way out. You could have exiled him, made him pay in other ways. Nothing can be done to make up for your sins but death, no amount of good means that you can come home. To the young boys that get wrapped up in terror organizations, sorry the only way you can be redeemed is death...don’t bother changing and coming back. They could have exiled him, had him start an academy with Rey for Jedi kids. He could have spent the rest of his days redeeming himself. Why tell us he was literally preyed upon, haunted, and manipulated as a child. Even in a fantasy world, a victim of mental illness and abuse can not catch a break. Ben as a child could not fall asleep due to the demon-like voices in his mind. Everyone abandoned him in his time of need. Ben never desired power like Anakin, he went over to the dark because “the voice” of his grandfather promised belonging. I am shocked that this is the message Disney sends us. Oh and yeah you can totally take on the Skywalker name for kicks...the disrespect I swear

16. The worst bit is that I am 90% sure there was another ending that was scrapped. There was a promo shot of Jannah in a field, soft lighting, lush planet. It was exactly like P&P. Daisy Ridley said the lasts scene was known to only Her, Jannah on that panel (Driver was away). Convinced Jannah was looking at Rey and Ben starting a new life away from the desert which she and Luke hate so much. Hence the production of “A New Home” soundtrack. Hence why the “Farewell” song played behind Reylo kiss was hopeful. Why Luke’s soundtrack when he became part of the force was not triumphant. Why the death scene was sudden and cut weird and no sorrow from Rey. CAUSE THEY SCRAPPED THE ORIGINAL ENDING LAST MINUTE. Everyone knows JJ was still editing one month before. The concept art which was supposed to be released this month has been pushed to March. Why you ask? They need to remove the pages with a happy ending. He just didn’t have the guts, pandered to everyone and yet no one. He was successful in creating a beautifully filmed action-filled movie with none of the heart of Star Wars.

And then she goes and buries Anakin’s saber on freaking TATOOINE. He HATES Sand and Luke wanted to get away from there as soon as possible. Of course, a Palpatine would torture them that way. But nostalgia is the cash cow so. JJ can only generate nostalgia, not create original stories. IF he had any creativity she would have buried it at Padme’s grave.

The fanboys say “leave the romance for the romance movies”....have you seen the original trilogy or the prequels? Star Wars has always had hope and romance entwined with it.

SO AFTER 40 YEARS...PALPATINE WINS...HIS BLOODLINE LIVES ON

...and people thought the prequels were bad

JJ you also said that your goal was for people to come out of the movie feeling more hopeful and happy then they went in...yet here I am. My roommate literally had to console me and buy me ice cream. I am just so numb. I am sure the casual fan will enjoy this, as seen from the rotten tomatoes ratings. I think the critics were too generous with this one,

Star Wars is very simple at its core, Good vs Bad and Dark vs Light. The kids are expected to understand that a Palpatine being the only one who lives is hopeful? That is the conclusion of three generations of Skywalker sacrifice...

This is how the Skywalkers are remembered...In Tragedy and Curse??

3K notes · View notes

tallstars-rewrite · 3 years

Text

Chapter 27

chapter list / previous / next

“What are the tenets of the warrior code?” Dawntripe asked.

Tallpaw sat up straight as he recited. “A warrior protects the helpless: no kit or sick will be left behind. A warrior has mercy for their enemies: they do not seek to spread death unnecessarily. A warrior values life, and is without greed: they never take their prey or land for granted and thank StarClan for all our blessings. A warrior rejects trading freedom and dignity for a chained life of comfort. And above all, our lives and loyalty is to our clan, whatever the cost.” Tallpaw had spent ages memorizing the right words to say and the intensity with how to say them until he knew it like the back of his paw. He felt a rush of relief when Heatherstar nodded her approval.

“You have trained him well, Dawnstripe. His progress has been impressive.” She said and Dawnstripe purred with pride for her apprentice as Heatherstar continued, “I think you were right in recommending him to take his assessment now. As long as you remember, young Tallpaw, that you will be judged harshly. Most apprentices would need to train at least another moon before being considered for their full warriors ceremony.”

Tallpaw dipped his head “I understand Heatherstar. Thank you for the opportunity. I promise I will not let you down.”

He spoke with practiced evenness that he had been mastering throughout his training, since indeed he felt or thought very little that was not dedicated to improving his ability and impressing his elders. He offered first to join every patrol that would have him, extended training sessions well past sunhigh when the rest of the clan dozed, and spent most of his downtime cleaning nests and fetching fresh bedding. Though often exhausted and sore, his body had never failed him. Keeping busy kept him focused and even sometimes kept the dreams away. Even so, Tallpaw felt like it wasn’t enough. There was still upset restlessness in his belly. A restlessness he was sure would be satisfied as soon as he’d proven himself worthy of his name.

Heatherstar eyed him. “Hareflight informs me Shrewpaw is ready to take his assessment again. All the better for apprentices to take it together. You will both be ready by evening, I presume?”

“Yes Heatherstar,” Tallpaw said. He hid his irritation at the thought of dealing with Shrewpaw throughout this important trial. Heatherstar wanted to know he was above letting personal squabbles get in the way of what needed to be done, but Tallpaw was not confident the high strung tom would not do something to try and sabotage him. But surely...after already failing an assessment, even Shrewpaw wouldn’t risk doing anything to jeopardize this one. We both want the same thing. And after it’s done, hopefully I won’t have to think of him again.

Even so, a battle assessment against Shrewpaw was not something he looked forward to. Shrewpaw could easily match many of the best warriors in his fighting skills. It was certainly not raw ability that had been holding him back from his name. Tallpaw shook the apprehension buzzing around in his head like a fly away to the back of his mind. He could handle Shrewpaw. It didn’t matter if the battle assessments were won, it was about the skill shown during it. And he knew Shrewpaw well enough by now to know exactly how he fought. Being ‘just good enough’ isn’t going to cut it. I need to be better. And I will. Shrewpaw isn’t going to get in my way.

***

“An enemy has invaded,” Dawnstripe debriefed Tallpaw and Shrewpaw, who stood side by side, stiffly avoiding each other's gaze. Hareflight acted as the intruder. There was almost an ease when they didn’t have to speak to each other, and relied only on tail signals and the steps they knew by heart.

The ambush went off without a hitch. Tallpaw used his size advantage to bowl Hareflight off his paws while Shrewpaw lashed out with lightning fast paw strikes.

“You did well, keeping track of each other.” Hareflight said, catching his breath as he picked himself up. He looked relieved. “I am impressed.”

The next part was a little more nerve wracking. One on one combat. Shrewpaw eyed Tallpaw carefully as they circled each other, and arched his back in a menacing snarl. It was all postering of course, Shrewpaw was certainly very good at that. His unkempt dark brown fur bristled to make him look twice his size. But Tallpaw knew in the back of his mind that it wasn’t all acting. Shrewpaw rarely needed to fake anger, especially directed towards him.

Tallpaw struck first this time, feigning the left and then boxing Shrewpaw hard on the side of the head. Shrewpaw responded just as fast, and shoved into Tallpaw’s chest. The toms grappled each other and wrestled fighting for an advantage. Shrewpaw had latched himself to Tallpaw’s side and was very difficult to get off, like an obnoxious little thorn. At last, he shook Shrewpaw’s grip loose and they broke off. Shrewpaw spat out a small clump of fur and circled again.

“You’ll have to do more than cling like a burr,” Tallpaw growled.

“Will I?” Shrewpaw spat “You fall like a tree, and then all you do is flail.”

“Only if you can actually knock me down first.”

Their voices were hushed. Their mentors were a distance off, watching their moves without getting in the way. Shrewpaw took Tallpaw’s challenge and grappled around his neck and shoulders. Tallpaw bit at him but somehow Shrewpaw scratched onto his back and yanked his scruff. The feel of needle sharp claws digging into his flesh made him gasp. He can’t seriously mean to start a real fight now. Tallpaw was more angry than anything else. He snarled and took Shrewpaws forepaw in his jaws and bit harder than he normally would, then yanked him sideways, wincing as claws dug in harder. “Can’t you fight like you're supposed to for once?” Tallpaw growled. “Are you sure you even know how to behave like a warrior?”

He thought Shrewpaw might have laughed. “Rich coming from you, go on and tattle on me then. You know you can’t beat me in a real fight.”

“I’m not here to prove myself to a fox-hearted kit.” Tallpaw hissed in his face.

Shrewpaw struck him surprisingly hard, and his nose felt wet. “Who do you have to prove yourself to? You're pathetic, and so transparent.”

“Just shut up and fight me Shrewpaw.” Tallpaw growled.

“I’m glad you feel guilty, you know. You deserve to. You got what you deserved and lost what I lost, and you have no one to blame but yourself.”

Tallpaw knew, somewhere in the back of his head, that Shrewpaw was only saying something so awful because he desperately wanted him to lash out first. To do something obvious that would cause him to fail, and delay his ceremony.

He knew that, and yet anger blurred Tallpaw’s vision as he slammed into Shrewpaw and sank his teeth into his scruff, shaking him hard. Shrewpaw clawed into the back of his neck and bit at his face. Tallpaw’s eyes were squeezed shut but didn’t pull away. The two toms rolled into the grass and kicked and swiped but Tallpaw refused to yowl when Shrewpaw stuck his claws into his pelt. It was as if Shrewpaw was daring him to. Go on and yowl, they’ll stop us. But he wouldn’t. Shrewpaw wouldn’t either. Tallpaws back stung everywhere. But he kept his rage on a leash and always stopped just short of cutting too much skin, letting teeth pinched flesh painfully without tearing it. Just enough to keep it from showing.

Dawnstripe bounded up to him, her fur bristled a bit and she looked wary.

“That’s enough. You’re both clearly capable.” Hareflight said, looking suspiciously at Shrewpaw’s pelt at a small dark stain soaking in beneath his tabby fur. It was unclear if it was from Tallpaw’s cuts or his own. Tallpaw stiffened at the sight of it.

Suddenly, Shrewpaw laughed.

“Guess we both got a bit caught up in it, huh Tall?” he said with a purr.

Tallpaw gaped at him for only a moment. But he forced his fur to lie flat.

“Yeah, I’m sorry Dawnstripe. My eagerness got the better of me. I’m alright though, Are you Shrew?”

“Course, just a scratch!”

Tallpaw felt a rush of relief as their mentors seemed to have bought it. It wasn’t so unusual for cats to get over eager and let their claws slip a little, was it? It didn’t mean anything bad. Dawnstripe and Hareflight nodded in satisfaction, looking relieved at the apprentice's apparent ease with each other. “Be a bit more careful in your spars. But I know how eager you are, Shrewpaw” Hareflight said. “We’ll move on to the last part. If you agree, Dawnstripe?”

Dawnstripe nodded. “Unless you need a brief rest to tend to those scratches.”

“No, we’re fine, it’s nothing.” Tallpaw mewed. He searched her gaze for a hint of suspicion. He stopped his tail twitching and smiled at her. There’s nothing to worry about, he thought desperately. He felt he’d gotten good at convincing her of that, it was the only way she was letting him take the assessment early.

Soon, the apprentices were both making their way to where they would have their hunting tests. Tallpaw felt faint claws of guilt poking at him. He really hated lying to Dawnstripe, even about small things. She deserved better than that. But he had to do this. He needed to become a warrior, and he needed her to believe he could do it. The friendly gleam in Shrewpaw’s eyes turned cold again the moment their mentors turned.

Nice try, but you can’t mess me up without taking yourself down with me. Tallpaw thought bitterly. Hate me all you want, but we’re going to get through this.

Unfortunately even when they split up, his fur still pricked and his claws itched with frustration. But he knew clawing Shrewpaw wouldn’t make it any better.

***

Tallpaw’s feet thudded across the ground, all his senses honed in on the small hare sprinting ahead of him. I just need to catch this, and then I’ll be one step closer. One step closer to it all paying off.

Shrewpaw might be faster with his claw strikes, but he wasn’t a match for Talltail’s speed. A hare, even a very young one, was much faster and more clever than a rabbit, not to mention much more dangerous. Which was exactly why that was Tallpaw’s chosen prey. The hare banked sharply to the right and Tallpaw let his body react for him, his long tail streaming behind him, anchoring his weight as he turned just as sharp. I’d like to see Shrewpaw pull off a turn like that, he almost laughed. It was surprising that even now, he could forget that Shrewpaw had no interest in competing with him anymore. There was less glory in it. They both just wanted to be done with each other. Tallpaw tried not to think about the hollow sound of the ground under his paws. There must be a tunnel. Hare’s didn’t burrow like rabbits, but he wasn’t sure if it would try for a hole in a last desperate attempt to escape. It sent a bolt of fear through him. He wouldn’t have the guts to chase this prey down a hole, but he didn’t want to fail either. Tallpaw pressed himself harder than he ever had before, forcing his paws to pick up more speed. This hare would not ruin his assessment. No matter how hard he pushed himself, the creature stayed ahead of him. He pushed until he felt his lungs would burst, but it still wasn’t quite enough. Why isn’t it enough, just...stop! There was a thick gorse patch ahead, too narrow for him to follow. The hare was headed for it. With a cry of frustration he sprang as it began to duck into a narrow hole amongst sharp branches and stone. It screamed as his claws connected with its hindquarters. Tallpaw struggled against it, trying to dodge its wildly kicking legs. It was a small hare, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t strong. He wanted to yowl in pain when it kicked him hard in the neck, but it just made his frustration flare up.

“You stupid creature!” he hissed “Just die already!”

He hauled it back hard and fought to grip its neck, but missed, and it turned its head to snap at his face. Even when it tore a small chunk out of his check with its sharp front teeth, he refused to give in. The kill was messy as Tallpaw fought with the hare that was trying to drag itself, and him, into the dark crevice under the thorns. At last a final burst of determination let him connect his teeth with its neck and tear a hole into it. The creature finally lay still as blood pooled around it. Tallpaw quickly dragged it all the way back, wincing at the blood trickling down his face.

He looked down with a twinge of guilt at the mess he had made of the prey. His claw marks scored down its sides and its fur clumped with blood and kicked up soil. Why would he get so angry at a creature trying to escape? Hares were a respected animal in WindClan, one of the few things swifter than themselves. It was clearly not full grown, otherwise he wouldn't have had a prayer of taking it down. It was a pitiful, messy way to be killed.

“Sorry,” he mumbled as he blinked down at the hare. “Thank you for your life.”

It was probably silly to feel so guilty over prey. Tallpaw stared at its body longer than he should have. It put up a fight, and to be caught by such a lousy hunter… He pictured eyes of hunters past shaking their heads at him. But all he could do was hope Dawnstripe hadn’t heard him yelling at it from wherever she was watching from. He’d caught the young hare, and now all he could was not put it to waste.

“Congratulations,” Dawnstripe’s purr caught him off guard. She was closer than he’d thought.

“I almost lost track of you. You're incredibly fast. I wasn’t sure you would do it when you chose that as your target, but you really pulled it off.” Dawnstripe sniffed the hare appreciatively.

Tallpaw dipped his head in thanks. So she hadn’t seen what a messy kill it was. The scratches were covered up in dirt.

“You’ve done well today, Tallpaw.” Dawnstripe said. “I think you’ve shown you're ready. You’ve improved so fast over these moons, and I’ve taught you all the skills you need to hunt and fight. There’s only one more thing to do. It’s nearly sunrise now, so we’ll return to camp and wait for Hareflight.”

They didn’t talk on the walk back as she had to help him drag the catch. He couldn’t help but feel there was more to Dawnstripe’s words when she said he knew how to hunt and fight. It felt like there was something she was leaving out that he still didn’t know. He wished he knew what it was.

chapter list / previous / next

#cw animal death #canon typical violence #FRU27 #chapter 27

12 notes · View notes