#ren ramblings

[solargrove]

i wish i could just play the sims in a carefree way and make little legacy posts but alas, i am a chronic perfectionist and if every bit of what i make or post isnt perfect i get upset and rage-delete it lmao

#ren ramblings #its such a bad habit but like. #i cant have something published that im not happy with #and it seems im never happy unless something is perfect which it never is #which is why u probably have noticed ive never really had luck when posting gameplay lol #ive had some technical issues along the way but mainly i just ragequit and delete everything #sigh maybe one day i will be less difficult in that regard #but i dont see that happening ANY time soon

[hoodedren]

"You shouldn't be on your phone at work" If I'm gonna be fighting for my life in the bathroom I'm gonna look at memes cucko

#Ren Ramblings #Renblings? #tryna think of a tag for posts like these

[saewokhrisz]

swing with me

#ops personal tag ramble upcoming did you know my tablet pen has been dead for the past month i had to draw this on my laptop #w my small kamvas pro 13 (i use a kamvas pro 20) #had to cuz the idea was rotting at my brain <3 #shuake #akeshu #persona 5 #p5 #persona #joker #ren amamiya #akira kurusu #goro akechi #my art #illustration

[chiricat]

big bro yu

#alternatively: 345 #finished p4 manga in 1 day. yet another emotional rollercoaster #p3 #p4 #p5 #minato arisato #makoto yuki #yu narukami #souji seta #akira kurusu #ren amimaya #persona 3 #persona 4 #persona 5 #cat’s art #they draw yu so well in the manga man #like hes gorgeous. stunning. JUST LIKE AKIRA… WWWAH #pushing off the ramble again because a) i forgot and b) i dont wanna make a post… i think ill just hide it in the tags as always www

[pyjamacryptid]

Feeling like the ultimate nerd niche right now. I’m studying information science, specifically cataloguing, while in a library. Immersive experience. Like a 4D movie.

Self-portrait on Lined Notebook Paper, c. 2023

#ren rambles #library #libraries #information science #library and information science #cataloguing #my art #ren doodles #doodle #doodling

[starstrike]

Mithrun's desire as an SA analogue

TW discussion of SA and detailed breakdown of aesthetics evoking SA. The way I discuss this is vivid in a way that may be triggering, though there is no discussion of actual sexual assault. Just survivor's responses to it.

People relate to Mithrun and see his condition as an analogue for a few different things, like brain injury or depression. And I think all of them are there. But I also see Mithrun's story as an SA analogue, and Ryoko Kui intentionally evokes those aesthetics. I think it's a part of Mithrun's character that a lot of people miss, but I very much consider it text. This is partially inspired by @heird99's post on what makes this scene so disturbing; so check out their post, too :)

So to start off with, the demon invades Mithrun's bed, specifically. There's even a canopy around it, which specifically evokes this idea of personal intrusion; the barrier is being pulled apart without consent or warning. The way the hand reaches towards Mithrun's body from outside of the panel division makes it almost look like the goat stroking over his body. It's an especially creepy visual detail; similarly, the goat's right hand parts into the side of the panel as well. It's literally like it's tearing the page apart; but gently. So gently.

Mithrun is in bed. It is his bed that the demon is intruding on. He's in a position of intimacy. The woman behind him is a facsimile of his "beloved" that he left behind; the woman who, in reality, chose Mithrun's brother. He is in bed with his fantasy lover, who is leaning over him. While this scene isn't explicitly sexual, it is intimate. And it is being invaded. The goat lifts Mithrun gently, who is confused, but not yet struggling.

The erotics of consumption and violence in Ryoko Kui's work(remember that the word 'erotic' can have many different meanings, please) are a... notable part of some of her illustrations. I would say she blurs the lines between all forms of desire: personal, sexual, gustatory and carnal, in her illustrations in order to emphasize the pure desire she wants to work with and evoke to serve her themes. Kui deploys sexual imagery in a lot of places in Dungeon Meshi, and this is one of them.

In this case, horrifically. The goat's assault begins with drooling, licking, and nuzzling. The goat could be enjoying and "playing with" its food. But it can also be interpreted as it "preparing" Mithrun with its tongue as it begins to literally breach Mithrun's body. The goat also invades directly through his clothing; that adds another level of disturbing to me. There's nothing Mithrun can do in this moment of violation. Mithrun is fighting, but he is fighting weakly, trying to grip on and push away when he has no ability or option to. All he can do is beg the goat to stop. And it doesn't care. This all evokes sexual assault.

The sixth panel demonstrates a somewhat sexual position, with Mithrun's thighs spread around the goat's hunched over body. In the next, the goat pulls and holds apart Mithrun's thighs as he nuzzles into him. The way the clothing bunches up looks a bit as if it has been pushed up. It has pinned Mithrun down onto the bed, into Mithrun's soft furs and pillows. It takes a place made to be supernaturally warm and comfortable, and violates it. It's utterly and intimately horrifying. To me, this sequence of positions directly evokes a rape scene. I think Kui did this very explicitly. These references to sexual invasion are part of what makes this scene so disturbing; albeit, to many viewers, subconsciously. It makes my skin crawl.

This is also the moment the goat takes Mithrun's eye. Other than this, the goat seems exceptionally strong, but also... gentle. It holds Mithrun's body tightly, but moves it around slowly. It doesn't need to hurt Mithrun physically. But in that moment, it takes Mithrun's eye. Blood seeps from a wound while an orifice that should not be pierced is penetrated. This moment, the ooze of blood in one place specifically, also evokes rape. That single bit of physical gore is a very powerful bit of imagery to me.

Finally; it is Mithrun's desire that is eaten. After his assault, Mithrun can find no pleasure in things that he once did. He is fully disassociated from his emotions. This is a common response to trauma, especially in the case of SA. It's not uncommon for people to never, or take a long time to, enjoy sex in the same way again; or at all. They might feel like their rapist has robbed them of a desire and pleasure they once had. I think this makes Mithrun's lack of desire a partial analogue for the trauma of sexual assault.

Mithrun's desire for revenge was, supposedly, all that remained. Anger at his assaulter, anger at every being that was like it; though, perhaps not anger. Devotion, in a way. To his cause. I don't know. But the immediate desire to seek revenge is another response to SA. But on to Mithrun's true feelings on the matter.

This is... So incredibly tragic. Mithrun feels used up. Like his best parts have been taken away. Like he's being... tossed aside. This certainly parallels the way assault victims can feel after being left by an abuser. Or the way assault victims feel they might be "ruined" forever for other partners. These are common sentiments for survivors to carry, and need to overcome. In the text, it's almost like Mithrun feels the only being who can desire him is a demon who might "finish devouring" him. That that's his only use. It's worth noting that Mithrun trusted the demon. Mithrun's world was built by the demon, and Mithrun, in that way, was cared for by the demon. I think this reinforces Mithrun's place as a victim.

There's also something to be said about Mithrun as a victim of his own possessive romantic and sexual desire. The mirror shows him his beloved just dining with his brother, and it infuriates him. He doesn't know if the vision is real, nor if she has really chosen his brother as a romantic partner. The goat then creates a whole fantasy world where she loves him. As Mithrun's dungeon deteriorates, she is the only person that continues to exist. Mithrun continues to have control over her. And that is the strongest desire the demon is eating, isn't it? There's something interesting there, but I don't know what to say about it.

In conclusion, I think Mithrun's story is an explicit analogue for sexual assault-- though, certainly, among other things! The way the scene plays out and is composed explicitly references sexual violation and invasion of the body. His condition mirrors common trauma responses to sexual violence. And, at the end, he finally realizes he can recover.

Let's end on a happy Mithrun, after taking the first step on his journey to recovery :) You aren't vegetable scraps Mithrun. But even if you were-- every single thing in this world has value. Even vegetable scraps.

#Mithrun #mithrun dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi #ren rambles #dungeon meshi meta #tag later #I refuse to post at prime time look at my dunmeshi meta boy #tw sa #sa tw #this is literally 1200 words slash 6 pages if I added citations and a proper essay format as well as an introduction to Mithrun's character #and general introduction of the text itself #this could literally be an academic paper #lmao #ren meta #rb this plsss i want ppl to read my essay

[decafdoodlez]

Spent my evening recreating Fox’s livestream setup in the sims. ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡ 🦊🔪🧡

#tpof fox #tpof ren #tpof #ren hana #the price of flesh #boyfriend to death #btd2 ren #the sims 4 #sims 4 #sims 4 screenshots #decaf txt #decaf rambles

[dreadful-windandrain]

listened to the real will wood album three times yesterday. here are my thoughts:

am i being detaIIIIIIIIINED? am i under arrest?? (yes!)

"this is a song written by a dead guy" the implications..........

unsyncopate cotard's solution right this fucking second

the transition into dr sunshine lives is SO GOOD

was it when i left the cave and swore i'd. NEVER GO BACK!!!!!!!

how did he make white knuckle jerk hornier. what's with the moans. and why do i like it better than the original.

HEART BLUER THAN MY b-b-b-b-bbbbbaaaaa~a~LLLLLS!

the weird voices he uses in thermodynamic lawyer sure were a choice

fucking ADORE front street live. even better than the original and my favorite off of this album. literally just. the tempo changes. "if you're not on your worst behavior... get the fuck out!" "is this shit enough proof for you?" "give us all that fucking osmosis! oh, yeah!!" "sing it with me you fuckers!". he made a villian song sound even more evil. wtf and well done

i trusted you i trusted you i trusted you i trusted you i tru

the long ass intro for hand me my [x], i'm [y]! is fabulous. the anticipation!!!

the tempo is also faster here than the original which is awesome but overstimulating as hell when the second half of the bridge hits

take it away, creeps

here's a song *first chord of 2012*

by retracing myyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ste-epppppppppp pssssssssss

the guitar riff that starts mr capgras makes my brain perk up like a bluetooth speaker being connected

FUCKING HURT EACH OTHER! COME ON!!!!

yet another banger intro! the latter half of this album does not miss!

can we drop this shit? i wanna see you at each other's throats, man, make some fucking noise. one two three oh YEAAAAAAAH

the transition here also. magical.

i definitely didn't almost cry at the end of fibrodysplasia ossificans progressiva when the tempo slowed down and everyone was vocalizing

-ish is so fucking underrated oh my GOD you people don't talk about it enough

the people who sang "myself again" after "and i'm gonna be"...... read the room

the new harmonies on where do you get off, front street, and mr capgras give me life

overall i love it but i do believe that ww didn't sing the song with five names to spite me personally. he did sing it on in case i die but still. you don't know how much tax fraud i would commit to hear it live with a full band

#will wood #will wood and the tapeworms #wwattw #the real will wood #wii woo #wee woo #ren's rambles

[murdockmeta]

I believe Matt Murdock would rather shoot himself in the foot before he'd ever cheat on his significant other.

However.

Studies have shown that, sometimes, Matt Murdock really loves shooting himself in the foot.

#matt murdock #daredevil #daredevil comics #ren rambles #BUT I DIGRESS

[solargrove]

i open the sims. i make a lesbian in cas. i close the sims.

#rinse and repeat baby #all of my ocs are going to be lesbians at this point 😭 #but thats just bcs we're so sexy and cool #i am a lesbian lover first and human second #ren ramblings

[travalerray]

The funny thing about my Shen Jiu transmigrates into Shen Yuan's body at the same time Shen Yuan transmigrates into Shen Jiu is that it takes place in the same universe wherein PIDW got rewritten into the SVSSS we see (just from LBH POV with the necessary plot holes of the side villains filled in) which means that SJ had to go through the agonizing ordeal of learning about what YQY did through web novel format. And I think that's going to fuck him over for days

#haha you were never left behind. But now you can't return to patch anything up either. Haha #(yeah I will probably never get around to writing it due to how lazy I am but..... I think about this sometimes. Hm) #shen jiu #yue qingyuan #qijiu #fucked up backstory reveals via fiction! We have all seen it #svsss #scum villian self saving system #scum villain's self saving system #ren zha fanpai zijiu xitong #kk's rambles tag

[ctrlseacat]

we just missed each other

#hi everyone . enjoy art that is based on my warped perception of them #bc i only just started november in p5r .. i think im only uhhhh 11/5 #so idk their dynamic fully yet but i see the appeal . they are silly #like i know a few spoilers (obviously) but like idk akechi confuses me i have no idea what his end goal is LOL #he is out here . anyways thanks for listening to me ramble goodbye #persona 5 #persona 5 royal #p5 #p5r #persona 5 fanart #p5 joker #p5 akechi #akira kurusu #ren amamiya #goro akechi #shuake #my art #sorry for writing an essay in the tags . much love #persona 5 spoilers #persona 5 royal spoilers

[hoarder-of-dragons]

Hey, reminder that Crowley and Aziraphale are in love

#that's it #that's the post #good omens #aziraphale #crowley #crowley and aziraphale #aziracrow #aziraphale x crowley #neil gaiman #ineffable husbands #anthony j crowley #david tennant #michael sheen #good omens headcanons #ren shitposts #ren's midnight shitposts #midnight ren rambles

[pyjamacryptid]

To Kill The King

GWEN & MORGANA (+ Uther)

I’ve been thinking a lot about To Kill The King 1x12 lately and how it established, early on, that Gwen and Morgana were narrative foils.

This would’ve been a fanvid if I had the time or less than 10 Merlin-related wips lol so it gets a meta post instead <3

#bbc merlin #Merlin #merlin meta #meta #to kill the king #Merlin 1x12 #Merlin S1E12 #guinevere pendragon #morgana pendragon #uther pendragon #merlin emrys #bbc gwen #bbc morgana #merlinedit #undescribed #bc it’s almost midnight for me and I’m almost asleep 😭 #ren rambles #kinda?? #morgwen #morgana x gwen

[starstrike]

I'm obsessed with how Shivers will outright tell you that the anodic music kids will fail. I think this implies that, even if you build up the club, nobody will ever visit it.

I think this was one of the times in Disco Elysium that I really... got it. After reading this, I decided to tell the kids to scram. They wouldn't succeed anyways. It felt terrible. I reloaded my save; I couldn't stand to do anything else. Just because hope, beauty, or love are temporary, does that make them any less valuable? Just because you know something will be snuffed out doesn't mean you shouldn't try. That hope and love is valuable for its own sake.

At the time, I was going through a severe depressive episode. I was moving out in six months before moving cross country, so why should I bother investing into my environment? I had this old fish tank I'd poured effort into, once. Got some new fancy aquasoil that would be great for my plants, but it needed time sitting underwater. I left it like that for… oh, months. This damaged, empty, sad little thing that I had once loved immensely.

But building that nightclub with those kids made me change my behavior. I got myself a $6 betta fish, shoplifted some plants from petco, and built my tank up again. Even knowing I'd need to break it apart. So what if it ends? So what if the dance club never becomes popular? You build something and dance with your community, even if your dream fails. Even if it ends. There was love there.

And I think that's one of the things Disco Elysium is about. The kids and their nightclub is a microcosm of the knowledge that the pale is enroaching on Insulinde and the rest of the world. There is a literal, tiny, hole in the world inside of that church. The hole is another reminder of entropy, of the End. And all of this takes place in an edifice of a centuries-old regime and a religion of maintaining the status quo. A religion of broken glass and broken promises. But you take those shards and build on top of them, transforming their meaning. You grow, you build, instead of apathetically letting things remain the same. You find hope and beauty and love even though you know it's unsustainable.

Because the 'now' is valuable in itself. And I love that about this game.

#disco elysium #disco elysium meta #shivers #acele #also pls rb if u like this teehee #ren meta #ren rambles

[gammagoop]

buttercups aka 60s psychedelic band aka docm torture group

drawing these 3 is basically an infinite clout glitch but i promise i do it because i love it

#hermitcraft #fanart #mcyt #grian #mumbo jumbo #gtwscar #goodtimeswithscar #i need people to understand that psychedelic is a similar but distinctly different style from the hippie movement #they are not the second coming of the s6 hippies. you cant get rid of ren and impulse that easy! #idk i like doing style studies so thats what i did #theres not much to tag in this one so im just rambling now #o7 #masondrawing