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#sailor moon fic recs
geekghoul · 10 months
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While AO3 is hella down I just want to offer some fanfics that I have downloaded to my iPad.
I’m pretty sure I could dm you the links to whatever I’ve got. It might only work for Apple but idk.
I’m not gonna delve into the nitty gritty of what each fic is but if you want something to read rn I’m willing to share privately
(The Les Mis is mostly Enjoltaire and the marvel is mostly Stucky btw)
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random-mailbox · 6 months
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Random-Mailbox's Favorite Sailor Moon Fics - College AU
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I am back this week with some College AU stories! You can check out the previous 52 weeks of recs at the end of this Crystal Tokyo post (link).
As always, my apologies in advance for spoiling some of these for you (Fic Titles are linked to either FFN or AO3 entries).
Party On Campus - Luvdarain5
A bit of OG anime characterization on aged up Serena and Darien. Amy and Serena get invited to a college party by Zoi, which goes swimmingly until it doesn't.
i send you a sign, send you a signal - @hellomomo
Usagi decides to take a 300-level Emotion and Motivation Psychology class, solely because Mamoru mentioned he would be in it, making her term project on "goals" - getting Mamoru to fall in love with her (and writing a paper about it).
Wish You Would - @idesofnovember
Usagi slipped into a college party for the food, claiming to know the host's roommate TO the host's roommate, launching a sequence of exchanges that will drive Mamoru to seriously consider what he wants.
Better Than Dreaming - @wishwars
Returning a textbook Mamoru left behind at her library table should be quite simple. Except Usagi may have gotten more than she bargained for by going inside after hearing sounds emanating from his dorm room.
Stuff Tippy Wrote -- Sailor Moon edition: Chapter 5: right hand, yellow /Chapter 6: The day after Twister - @tiptoe39
At a college party, Usagi gets pushed into playing Twister by Rei and Minako against the one person who has been poking fun at her (no matter how cute he looks when he actually smiles!). 
And we are lucky to get a peek at the day after too! Where Usagi and Mamoru try to figure what happened and what's next.
Summer's Day - Please, more like Moonlight- @midnightdrops
Starting with a disclaimer: this story is amazing BUT it is not complete - Dr @midnightdrops has an outline for the remaining chapters already completed but is currently drowning in work. 
In this non-senshi College AU, Mamoru tries to figure out how he is feeling about his polar-opposite girlfriend, while external forces work on ripping them apart. 
The Secrets We Bear - Tumblr Snippets -  @lilliebellfanfics
This link is to some of the shorts that were published for Dendy Week 2022 (are part of a larger story that @lilliebellfanfics is working on) but are amazing as stand-alone chapters, exploring Mamoru navigating his new powers, university life and priorities. 
And last but not least, you should explore @caelenath 's musings in her Mamoru in College tag here on Tumblr - amazing little snippets in there!
That's it for now! I will do another fic list post soon. In the meantime, you should explore some of the prior lists and all the amazing content coming from the @senshixshitennouweeks!
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fabulous-fic-quotes · 7 months
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“Guys,” Makoto asked.
“Yes?” Ami asked back.
“Do you think Mamoru-san would be good for her?”
“If he wasn’t, he’d be burnt to a crisp right about now.”
“Rei-chan!” Ami said, scandalized.
“It’s my job to watch her back,” Rei said simply. “I think fire is more satisfying than a punch.”
“Oh, but punches can be fun, too,” Makoto replied with a smirk.
“You two,” Ami said, a smile tugging at her lips.
“Like you wouldn’t!” Rei challenged.
“What, you mean put a guy in his watery grave if he harmed Usagi-chan in any way? Or impale him with ice? Or freeze him to death?”
The girls just stared at her wide-eyed as Ami went on.
“Nope, never thought of it,” Ami finished with a wink.
Moonlit Musings - Sidus_Spei
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ionlydrinkhotwater · 2 years
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He is the one named Sailor Snow!
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Dedicated to @facewithoutheart @krisrix for making Sailormoon-Simon Snow crossovers my religion. Check out @facewithouthearts new fic
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Want to read this one and scared I’ll loose the window and link before I do. Waiting for an AO3 account to approve so I can start bookmarking things.
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bakubunny · 5 months
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looking for fluff recs because, surprise surprise, there’s rarely any on my dash.
blogs or fic recs are fine, anything on tumblr or ao3.
♡ bunny ♡
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konstantya · 5 months
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Was digging through some old DW posts (for Reasons), and came across a reminder of this, which is honestly one of my favorite reviews ever. It isn't even for one of my fics, but my god, I wish it was.
* Swooosh*
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caelenath · 1 year
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I recently discovered that Usagi and Mamoru doing their idiots-in-love dance in Vegas was the trope I didn't realize I needed.
Thank you for @random-mailbox for finding these. I ate them up on the spot.
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kasienda · 2 years
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Fic Authors Self Rec
When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love! 💖  @tinacentury tagged me for this absolutely impossible task! Haha! But I’m going to give it a go! 
1. Right Behind You - This is an Adrino slow burn - friends to lovers - based on my own love story. I made myself cry working on this one today. And I don’t mean I teared up. I was fucking bawling so hard I had to take a break, and then I came back to it, and did it again! Clearly I’m baring my soul in this one. It’s definitely my favorite at the moment. 
2. The Five Minute Adventures of Snake Noir - This is just Adrien abusing the snake miraculous to get emotional support and to take breaks on life. This was my most popular fic this past year by far, and it was just FUN to write. 
3. An Open Secret - Adrien and Marinette have figured each other out, but they can’t talk about it without their knowledge getting back to Fu who will confiscate their miraculouses. This was one of the first fics I wrote for this fandom. I come back to it again and again, and the final confession scene in the rain hits me every single time. Sometimes, I still can’t believe I wrote this one. 
4. Aftermath - This fic is a Hawkmoth was defeated (pre-reveal) fallout story. It starts in a dark place (suicide attempt), and is showcasing Marinette and Adrien gradually and slowly pulling themselves and each other out of despair. I haven’t posted a ton on this one yet. It’s heavy to work on, and requires a ton of research, BUT I’ve learned SO MUCH about mental health and physical disability working on this one and I love it for that reason alone. But it also seems to be a powerful piece. A few commenters said this one made them feel less alone, and that’s amazing. 
5. A Craving for Chocolate Milkshake - This one is from Sailor Moon, and is still one of my favorites! In this one Usagi and Mamoru discover slowly that after an encounter with a youma, they can read each other’s minds. It’s my first stab at comedy, and I think it was fairly successful in that regard! 
So how many fics did I want to include that I had to cut? Only one! But I also refused to even consider any one-shots because they often don’t leave as much as an impact on me. But there’s a few there that I’m insanely proud of as well. Ah well! I’m gonna actually follow the rules for once! 
No pressure tags to: @jennagrinsoverml, @ladyofthenoodle, @sunfoxfic, @flightfoot, and @mikauzoran. AND ANYONE WHO WANTS TO DO IT! Don’t wait for a tag. If you want to do it, do it! These things are supposed to be fun! Let yourself brag about your own work! 
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daikon1 · 2 years
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Sailor Moon Rectober 2022 (Mutual Pining)
Hi all! This year for Rectober, I wanted to collect recs for people’s favorite Sailor Moon mutual pining fics!
Please reblog this post with your five all-time favorite Sailor Moon fics featuring mutual pining (between any pairing!) and tag three other people to play!!
(Please REBLOG rather than repost so we can keep all the recs in one place! You can remove previous responses to keep the post from getting too long)
Happy reading 😘
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sailormoonandme · 1 year
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Summary: Makoto falls for another random boy that reminds her of her Senpai. This time, it's the coffee shop barista. Fluff
Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43964325
Author: SinJazz
Rating: General Audiences
Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: F/M
Fandom(s): Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga)
Relationships: Kino Makoto/OC
Characters: Kino Makoto, Kino Makoto's Senpai, Original Characters, Original Male Character(s), Original Human Character(s), Original Male Human Character(s), Tsukino Usagi, Hino Rei, Mizuno Ami, Aino Minako, Tenoh Haruka, Kaiou Michiru, Original Female Character(s), Original Female Human Character(s)
Genre/Tags: Coffee Shops, Bakery and Coffee Shop, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Speechless, Shyness, Awkwardness, Awkward Flirting, Awkward Crush, Adorable, Fluff, Romantic Fluff, Action & Romance, Action, Action/Adventure, Magical Girls
Words: 2533
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iwrestledavongonce · 1 year
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Chapters: 24/29 Fandom: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Live Action TV), Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga) Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Aino Minako/Hino Rei Characters: Hino Rei, Aino Minako, Artemis (Sailor Moon), Hino Rei's Father, Tsukino Usagi, Mizuno Ami, Kino Makoto Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, PGSM (Live Action)!AU, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Like the thoughts of your soulmate will appear on your skin, Slow Burn, Actress/Idol Aino Minako, Transformation Struggles, Inner Senshi Bonding, Fluff and Angst, smut in later chapters, But it's really super vanilla, shared feelings Summary:
Soulmate!AU and PGSM!AU
Rei Hino never wanted to be engaged with soulmates. Most importantly, her own. But when sentences suddenly started to appear on her skin, she wasn't prepared for it in the slightest.
Eventual Reinako.
And my current second most favorite fic got an update as well! Written by @hikamaus
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random-mailbox · 10 months
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Random-Mailbox's Favorite Sailor Moon Fics - Week 45 - Reviving Shitennou
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This week’s post is about bringing Shitennou back into the fold of the team. I wish that had happened in the manga / anime and am a little disappointed we did not get that in Cosmos. BUT that is what fanfiction is for! (To help us collectively right the wrongs / misses in original materials).
We are exactly ONE week away from @usamamoweek2023! Are you excited? Because I am very excited and am trying to finish my own submissions for this year's prompts
@smquickies2023 prompts are out too - that event is taking place August 6-12 (and is open to any SM pairings).
As always, my apologies in advance for spoiling some of these for you (Fic Titles are linked to either FFN or AO3 entries).
Deal Breaker - ninashtia
Keeping his shitennou being alive and well as a secret from his princess is bound to backfire on Mamoru. But not in the way he had expected.
Reunion - bashfulglowfly
In this story we get to witness the aftermath of the Dark Kingdom arc, but in an AU where Usagi didn't fight alongside our senshi and Tuxedo Mask in Tokyo (she still participated but from halfway across the world).
Embrace the Chaos - @serpentinred
Ami is thrust into keeping secrets and weighing possibilities, when her supervisor introduces her to someone who looks suspiciously like Kunzite. I love the art that @smokingbomber did for this one!
all things that are dark - @fated-addiction
Although this is technically just the first chapter of a fic that will hopefully get finished one day, it could stand as a one-shot as well. It gives glimpses of post-Galaxia thoughts Usagi has as she readies for the future.
The Shitennou Return! A Trip to the Beach in Peril - @chuplayswithfire
Mamoru has been keeping a secret from Usagi, something that she takes in stride and decides that a beach-day together with the girls would be the best way to get everything out in the open and see how it could all work. This fic has art by @mochibuni!
all my friends are dead and they bloody haunt me - @smokingbomber
Usagi, noticing some strange behaviour from Mamoru, takes a peek at what he could be up to. And decides that she can help fix everything.
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That's it for this week. Reminder - no post next week since it will be UsaMamo Week. We will return to regular posts on July 31st with "Tutoring"
Here are the links to the previous Tumblr posts in these series to explore more amazing works based on different themes - make sure to check them out if you haven't had a chance! (Click on title name to go to the post) - I will keep updating the list every week as new posts come up:
Week 1 - Groundhog Day
Week 2 - Established Relationships
Week 3 - Sex Positivity
Week 4 - Unfinished Stories
Week 5 - Darker Stories
Week 6 - Potions 🧪
Week 7 - Reveals
Week 8 - 👻Halloween🎃
Week 9 - Wrong Perceptions
Week 10 - Non-Senshi AU
Week 11 - In-Progress Fics
Week 12 - Mutual Pining
Week 13 - Enemies to Lovers
Week 14 - Slow Burn
Week 15 - Christmas Part 1 - Ugly Christmas Sweaters and Santa!
Week 16 - Christmas Part 2
Week 17 - New Years
Week 18 - High School AU
Week 19 - Slice of Life
Week 20 - Coffee shop AU
Week 21 - Huddle for Warmth
Week 22 - Friends to Lovers
Week 23 - ❤️Valentines Day❤️
Week 24 - Do a Grouch a Favour Day (or Cheer Up Fics)
Week 25 - Soulmate AU
Week 26 - Amnesia Fics (and resources)
Week 27 - 🍀St Patrick's Day🍀
Week 28 - Fix it Fics
Week 29 - Prompt: Mug
Week 30 - Flowers
Week 31 - Traditions
Week 32 - Dreams
Week 33 - Friends
Week 34 - Body-Swap
Week 35 - Medical Assistance
Week 36 - Sex Pollen
Week 37 - Psychometry
Week 38 - What If
Week 39 - Missing Scenes Part I
Week 40 - Green Jacket
Week 41 - Dr Chiba
Week 42 - Birthdays
Week 43 - Fluff
Week 44 - First Kiss
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reddoll123 · 2 years
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Summary: Jongin's a man who wears his heart on his sleeve, so it just makes sense that he'd end up wielding the interdimensional Heart wand as a guardian of the sun. And by what seems like fate, he ends up meeting another guardian named Kyungsoo who has the brightest heart-shaped smile and a way of making his heart flutter.
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goopeculiar · 8 months
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13 wonwoo/mingyu (+ side!pairings), PG-13, 50353 words. When The Crow’s Nest hires a new bartender, Wonwoo is determined to find out why he’s a nonmagic.
When Mingyu starts his new job, he’s trying (and failing) to keep up with the drinks the head bartender keeps teaching him -- and the ones he keeps giving him.
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usagisbanexd · 11 months
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+ SUPER SOLDIER SAILOR STARS #11 * _) _) >>C===3 :-* Kawaii Slash Lovers Collide Cosmic Paradise // Sailor Moon/Pokémon/Potterverse Altfic Crossover, CHAPTER 1.0.011
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1.0.011 AMI/SHIN/HERMIONE PLATONICA IRONICA, MAMO WAITING IN THE WINGS
Shingo has never seen Ami shit.
            Does Ami know that? She tries very hard to think of a reason why, she tries all the time. Shitting is comfortable, shitting is warm, you flush and then disperse.
            Shingo says ‘Water is efficient!’ with a finger raised. Shingo hates facts, and he hates Ami, and he loves his secret television and the whispers of the wind on the water. And if only his sister knew. And if only Ami saw the moonlight kiss his skin, then she would love him. But he knows that.
            The girl is asleep standing up. She’s always tired around boys. She thinks she knows why, but madness calls like a clang. That’s Shingo banging his head against the counter, far off in Luna’s lullaby. Don’t make me call Artemis, says Mina. Mina in the mind’s eye. Mina typing. Mina has a broken keyboard. She stole Shingo’s laptop. She did it on a loan. Shingo loves Ami. Ami prepares for takeoff. She can do this. ~ MINA, SIGNING OFF ;d xoxo AMI-CHAN, BELIEVE!
            Ami thanks Shingo. Shingo, quizzical, unknowing. Does this word have two Zs? She knows the answer. Fuck. Oop. Whoop. He knows the answer. Sick in his stomach, sick in his gut, a light turns off. Does Ami control the lights? He knows the answer. He thinks upon himself to mark his grave.
            He types with her.
            Easy, he thinks. Dissect me. Mina giggles with her mouth covered in Rei-chan’s stupid wet dream. Shingo knows all about Rei’s stupid wet dreams, knows he’s the man with his hand in the mirror, knows he’s the one for Mina, Mina P, Sailorvenus, Sailorfirst, Sailorstardeath, Sailorcomeincubus, Sailorsurroundsound. Does he love his sister’s decoy? Does he love pie? And Pizza Palace? And soft imperialism. That’s Ami’s inbred thought. DESTROY. Dream of men.
            Dream on. ~ Ami & Mina P, holding hands in the summertime. Mina sickens. Not the effort of a needle but the force of the ejaculate. She feels like a frog on a coffin, her entrails stretched and neon bleating. Ami, use your henshin stick! It’s okay to have a henshin stick.
            Shingo grabs the popcorn.
            Does Ami balk? I don’t balk. I don’t think. I move. The emperor over all assumes the throne, does it alone, does it for me, me, for me, Ami, stop, what are you doing? I’m on the phone! She’s dead.
            She’s in space. Omniscience kills. Only secret agents can handle it. I am one. Born one. Born on the wrong side of the tracks. Born to kill. Born to believe. Never to bear children. The emperor sickens. I weaken the earth. Shingo, you’re in love. Shingo, I’m not okay with that. I grow up. Why am I trying? The path hurts me. Elios, come.
            I am in the sun. I bear gifts.
            How? say Endymion and Ami, their eyes like quadruplet saucers overbearing the earth. You come to conquer heavens, say the sun’s bright rays, and through Shingo’s mouth the light is shafted like an eternity in waiting. Throw another monster at the fire. I’ll pick it up. Shin lives, Shin springs, Shin dances like an eternal dancer in the jowels of heaven. Never stop fighting, that’s a soldier’s job. Mina knows we’re at the fore, all of us, together, forever dancing. Shingo the greatest senshi lives to great again, and Ami in her maggot mind the whole time stealing the egg. Venus knows it’s a pearl we wear on our finger, and Endymion believes, and all know shining victory. But sister is dead, and Mom is crying, and together we stop time to watch a movie.
            Is this really happening? says Ami.
            Why not? says Mina P, stepping over herself to help a friend in need. I came upon you sleeping and thought you deserved to wake.
            You’re not neurotic at all, says Ami.
            My mom, says Venus, becoming a critter in the arms of a little goy that should be picking its nose. Is this crazy? thinks the goy, knowing full well that birds talk better than mice.
            Mice pee on each other, says Shingo, a fact he learned from trial and error. He had a mouse. It crawled aboard his hand and passed from left to right, and Venus says he’s at the right hand of the Father, and she says so with a finger pointed crooked to heaven, and she does so for Ami and for fortitude, for Mercury’s bubble magic, for peacetime and for those who dropped the bomb, blond-haired blue-eyed -shelles, perfect in their mystery, presaging holy famine.
            Did we have to? whines Shingo, his eye like some great mystery overtaken by alchemical omniscience. Why does she not love God? Both of us have together the arms of Helios, and Mina would say holds, and Umino says yes, and Ami knows he’s good at English, that his passion is reading in the summer, that he sits at his window and plays cards, that he collects, that he loves the pretty pictures. And so does Mina. Umino her greatest ally, her passionfruit, her forager. Umino the bird dropped out of the nest. Is Shingo a bird?
            Keep googling me, Ami. Keep trying to win your war. I and the sun will go like lightning before the gods with our hands washed clean. Drink from the Rivers Lethe and Mnemosyne. Last night I did it, too. If you were there with Jim Jones, what would you have done?
            Died, says Ami. We have similar interests.
            Ya, says Shingo, thinking of Mina. Mina in her red satin haircut, loving togetherness, loving the oval, holding the heart aloft like the cornucopia of victory granted to her by foreign dignitaries, or some great god, or Salmon Rushdie’s greatest cliches. It’s Salman, says Shingo. I said that, says Venus, who thinks we’re all going to die when we’re damn well ready, and I can be Trinity if I want to, and Ne Yo’s waiting in the wings, white-haired, ready to jump with me off the balcony to certain Crouching Tiger, and Crystal Tokyo is immense, and we’re all there, and we’re ready, and let’s do this slow. Ami, get off the computer!
            Shingo smiles a weakening one. Enslaved by his stomach, always wondering what he ate when Ami’s around. How does Venus love this girl? Beautiful orange, beautiful blue, moss-headed. Does she think she knows everything? Silly girl. Don’t be Hermione Potter without finger-wagging. Remember, stale fish don’t get caught.
            Mina’s over idioms. She died for God. She feels the sun, it turns her skin orange. In Crystal Tokyo, imbibing at her bedside a cocktail of ambrosial margarita two days expired, she thinks she’d be more glamorous if it was ten weeks expired, and so does Shingo. Where’s Usagi? Oh, right, she’s dead.
            Ami thinks that’s okay. She never thought Usagi was her mistress. She never gave her that coy embrence. Never thought eternity waited in the malice. It’s Mina’s shoes, they’re too tight. That’s her mother talking, her southern mother, born and braised in Nipon, Italy, Nipon, Italia, Nipon, Light Stroller, Nipon, ETERNITY IS TALKING. FOR ONCE AND FOR ALL I LOVE SHINGO. ~ AMI
            Baby, why you always lying? Shingo, get off Tik Tok. Bu- bu-.., I have no man! Mom, I need forty eight dollars to buy me a slot machine.
            You can do it with forty eight hours of effort, says the emperor, forgetting himself, splitting off Endymion’s thigh like a hunk of wood dispersed from his engine. What does Ami mean? She’s helping stabilize the vortex. Always with that fucking vortex. Usagi’s dead.
            “Hi,” says Setsuna, laced up black falcon pumps the size of eagles beating down pigeon-toed loving the secrets of black dirt. Her journeyer’s staff resting against her side, a Greek god frozen in repose, thinking in stalagmites, thinking in isolate. Those are Ami’s teeth, beware. There’s nothing this girl won’t do for the sake of her nostrils, sniffing out the causes of entropy and diagnosing herself sick with fever. All of us slaves to the emperor. I have an idea, slave to women, birth more men.
            He’s trying, says Shingo.
            Mina funnels a shrug until it’s infinity shrinking on the right side of her mouth, and feels sick. Who to call? The Batphone. Barbara Gordon, glamor, wigs. She misses her dad, keeps his picture in her wallet, something branded and incomplete, a perfect picture of a world without Rei. Sigh. Rei. Love. Hearts. Confusion. Ruling thunder. And then Mako approaches, Mako from death, Mako the walking corpse. I miss Bunny. My pet bunny, not Usagi. She can handle it. Everybody, quick, look to the stars!
            Shingo dives eternity and thinks of Mamoru, his black eyes, his face, his cutting silhouette. And his sister in repose, waiting in a glass tank to be fired off to space. And what’s wrong with that? What’s to think he did it? She lives. She always lives. He’s seen wings burst out of her back. She’s fine. Wait. That girl dies. Does Ami know?
            Yeah, babe, she says, and Mina shakes her head. “In the common tongue, babe is used to intimidate competing uteruses! It’s mathematical,” she says.
            “I know,” says Ami. “The emperor is making me say that.”
            “Leave him,” says Mina, snapping up a book, “another man will take his place. All hail Queen Usagi, Lordess over dustmites. Sleep eternal.”
            “That’s Beryl talking,” says Ami.
            “Beryl’s his penis, stupid. Think about it. What does he do all day, that Tuxedo Kamen?”
            “Fights crime,” says Ami at his behest, at the throne of the emperor.
            “Why are you so loyal?” asks Mina. “He beats her.”
            “He tries,” says Ami.
            I beat him, thinks Shingo. He doesn’t mean it.
            “He’s trying to be someone,” says Ami, quizic, fizzic, physical, fizzy. Shingo opens up a dictionary. Dad’s gift to a sick puppy. Chain him to a rock and watch the ocean rise. Ami taps her finger. The sea level. Shingo’s stomach is sick, and it’s not in his head, and he really has a healthy grasp on reality, doesn’t he? ~Ami
            He tries, says the emperor, heavy-headed, split Zeus, a milkshake. Shingo and Ami dream of milkshakes. Venus watches on from a vantage. She never had a little brother, somebody to put in make-up and tie to an office chair. She never had a staircase, only stone steps leading up to a dungeon, and endless streams of wheat. And where is Mako? In the arms of a mother, hoping the dark will leave her eyes. Does Ami know? Can Mako be reached? Will this dastardly duo get away with their crime? Avaunt, to Ganymede.
            “I hope,” says Shingo, “Mom makes something for breakfast.” She can’t stop crying. Usagi gone. Dad dead of a heart attack on the living room sofa. And all Mom does is the laundry, her heart locked away from me cold. Usa could elicit her tears, illicit her embrace, it doesn’t work like that, but don’t you see, Ami, that it does? And the sun the deliberator waits for Mina’s face, and Ami hugs Shingo from a vacuum, and it's mist on his skin, and Mist, and Ami’s learning, and thinking all the time, and relaxing to a parachute slid from the water on vestigial planet mercury, an ace in the hole of a torpedo. Wince. Don’t put things in there! It’s little.
            Last night you did desire it, says mercur. And you’re leaving me for another woman again, says Shingo, says Mamo, but I love you. I’ve always loved you. Leave my sister and this won’t happen. She’s fine.
            She’s off in hell chasing the devil, says Mamo, and you’re on her laptop in the future arguing with the past to get better grades.
            Don’t spank me in front of this dyke, thinks Shingo, says Shingo, knows they’re watching and it’s complicated. Knows Michiru’s sad beauty.  Knows the harp she plays. Knows her expertise on every instrument. Michi, goddess Columbine, sad-eyed lady of beautiful Serenity, Moon Queen’s favorite daughter. If only my toes were pointed that way to God, then Ami shouldst know there were a heart in Egypt. Thanks Emperor Venus, the mommy at my breast. Whoop. Mamo, I’m IMing you to talk about my research paper.
            It’s homework, says Ami. And you can but I don’t advise it, and far off the goddess Hekate jangles her keys, and how beautiful, how pretty, how insightful, how livid. Thinking of her all of my life. Should I go down? On Pansy, says Hermione, faintly glowing, and the spell reverberates from across the pond and brings us back to the shattered remnants of Tokyo City after the bomb. Don’t play with magic, says Mina P, vocoded to hell and back again, unless your heart’s in it. Shingo, talk to Hermione.
            I hate Hermione, thinks Shingo, appearing insignif. Never thinking why he tries. My horoscope says Ginny Weasley, Mom, now go do my laundry.
            I hate it, thinks Hermione, roiling in her grave. From the distant future a worm spouts like ‘Exascerba!’ and Entrifigus Proto Entropoalises the arsonigophical compound. Ron, you’re the worst typist in the world.
            I love Hermione, he tells Venus, but how the fuck did we do that with these notebooks?
            Riddle did it, says Harry, masturbating furiously under the covers to gay porn. Neville’s arms. Draco’s smile. Pinned against the stone wall, glistening, and Cho my wife, my trophy, my shining glory. And Cedric, valiant Cedric, turned to dust.
            Get off the computer, says Ami. Go outside. Be afeared by that wizard from across the sea, coming with the light of Aslan to marry me.
            You’re too young for him, girl, a random gay man in an M4M chatroom. Not for me, not his reference, I’m mistaken. Dream on.
            I think I’m going insane, says Ami to Hermione, thinking quickly, and Hermione smells the sparks as they shoot through the air. Her bones. The force. Harry’s dead. He’s been this way for years. Ever since he found gay porn on Dudley’s computer my hypotenous --- Ron, stop typing, I can do it. There’s this thing called Spell Check, Harry thinks for Ron thinking for Harry, and the two of them stop fighting in the past and make up. You have Draco. I have Mione. We’re all going to be okay.
            But I’m not okay, Mione, I presageth famine. And how did the sun get a Facebook?
            It’s centrifugal, says Shingo, but men don’t let themselves participate. He winks. Ami smirks. Evil little rat. It has no name. Rats are rats who run the game.
            This is insane, says Hermione, meeting with her first time with her soulmate, emperor from across the sea, global Chinese cash money billionaire. What about Viktor? asks Venus, hating their perfume, hating the smell of their centrifugal forces, and the ugly dress they wear. All in the same outfit, all the time, for fun. Fashion lives through entropy like a burning eagle, and Shingo and I share looks from beyond the grave. Usagi is dead! Who are you?
            Hermione Granger, says the Ouija board, and if Ron misspells another word, I’m done doing his homework. And my dad’s a dentist. And I’m strong and proud. And Pansy Parkinson has a nice ass. And don’t panic, lady, we can refine this. It’s our fault this shit doesn’t work as expected. Where’d that come from? Shingo points upward, Mina fumbles in a trash can for the cigarette she saw hidden beneath an apple peel. Dead girls get what they want. Mione knows. She’s in the toilet of a nightclub in southwestern France having a cry. Viktor was supposed to meet her there. She wore her wedding ring, the one she bought for herself with Ron’s money, and she tears up when she thinks of Arthur Weasley walking her down the aisle. Arthur Weasley the knight, Arthur Weasley the captain, Arthur Weasley the centrifugal force. How do you make those symbols on the computer?
            They’re mugs, says Ron, typing from home. Dad bought him one last year.
            “All he does is talk to Japanese girls and look at porn,” said Ginny that summer, irate, ifrit, enlarged, her ancient ensign the bloody insignia of a girl who gets her period in plain sight. Borgiac, Borgiastic, Borgia indulged. Where’s Hermione? I’m going to teach her to inhale this time. Yes, baby, I fucked Dean Thomas, yes, he had a bigger penis than you, yes, I speak Japanese. Ni how, Hermione, there’s nothing to it.
            Arthur Weasley knows a Muggle, a little boy in Japan named Dan. He thinks with a camera in his eye, prizing the world away from its southern understanding. We flip poles, says Hermione, we’ll never find you.
            Don’t be Tom, says Ginny, and something goes on with her eyes. She puts the journal down spine up and wishes for a cigarette, for something to dispense with moment by moment, and Tom’s warm pelvis is on her throat. Was that wrong? If only she’d met the perfect man when she was the perfect woman. If only Cedric had never died. Now we’re saddled with two little kids and a perfect future threadbare on a couch, living in Grimmauld Place, a gay man’s perfect fixer-upper, and Harry’s awkwardly timed erections the stuff of a woman who’s outlived her dreams. I’m going to go to Cordoba, she thinks, but first I’m going to finish my first year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and I’m going to tell my dad it was stupid of him to make me believe I was allergic to chickens.
            Does all slash end well? thinks Ron.
            “You just keep scrolling until you see the word ‘cock,’” thinks Ginny to Venus to Hermione, and all along the Watchtower, villains take their places, and dead heroes dropped the bomb, and we’re doing it now, on Nagasaki, and that’s Muggle magic, and yes, it’s greater, and yes, that’s Chomsky, and yes, that’s all okay.
            Who dropped the bomb on Nagasaki? asks Shingo, red-faced, and Chiba-sama replies, daring her panties in a bunch. In a knot, baby, but Usagi’s dead. And Harry’s gone into the forest, and Neville the conquered hero, and such is the case with heroic women, poised to die for the sin of Eve. Shingo puking. Shingo laughing. Shingo trades himself the Eevee. Red and Green. Mina says it’s Christmas. Her diary’s leaking. Bubbling. Frothing. And where is my Mamo-chan? What’s this feeling in my chest? Should I write him a love letter?
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