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spidernerdsblog · 3 years

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Match made in Hell : Chapter Twelve

A/N : Chapter twelve is here. Ah only one more chapter left. Hope you like this chapter. Let me know what you think.

Pairing : Mob! Tom Holland x Reader

Summary : you always wanted a simple life but to be born as the daughter of a dangerous mobster turned out to be a curse for you. Everything changes when your father gets your lover killed and forcefully marries you off to another mobster as a part of a deal. You hate your father and your husband the only thing you seek is now revenge. Will you ever be able to fall in love again or this burning hatred inside you will consume you?

Warnings : fluff, pregnancy, misogyny, mention of blood, violence, language, missed typos.

SERIES MASTERLIST

“What's wrong?” Vanessa looks at you questioningly.

“I think I might have had skipped for a couple of days,” you admit, scrunching your nose.

“Can you be less vague? Cause I’m not getting it” she deadpans as you scowl at her for not getting your implication.

“Okay so I got shot a month ago I hope you remember that. I was on medication right? Well a lot of medications actually” you half shrug “so with all that going on I may or may not have forgotten to take the pills during that time and we got caught up in the moment at one time and things just happened you know”

“Well you guys are literal horndogs I have no doubt in that” she rolls her eyes “but you need to take the test” she states out to you.

“What? Now?” you looked at her stunned.

“Yes and right now” she stresses on her words.

“But I don't have any test kits at this moment” you mutter

“Then I'll ask someone to get them from the store”

“No! don’t tell anyone especially the boys” you give her a panicked look and Vanessa scoffs.

“OK relax I'll go and get it for you” saying so she left immediately. It took half an hour for Vanessa to make a trip round to the store as you waited for her in your room anxiously.

“Here” she hands you the pregnancy test kit. You nibble on to your bottom lip glancing back and forth between the box and her face.

“C'mon go on” she urged you on. You finally stood up and went inside the bathroom. Closing the door behind you let out a deep sigh taking one last glance at the box before opening it. After reading the instructions carefully you proceeded to do accordingly. When you were done you placed the stick on the marble counter and opened the door for Vanessa to come in.

“Done” you inform her.

“OK, now we wait,” she says, glancing at her watch. Five minutes appeared to be five years for you as you paced back and forth while Vanessa chewed on her nails leaning on the counter in anticipation.

“OK it’s time” she announces and you feel your heartbeat quicken. You took a deep breath and stepped forward to have a look but immediately backed off feeling anxious.

“Oh god I can't look at it” you wrap your arms around yourself.

“What?” Vanessa looks at you puzzled.

“You check it for me please I can’t” you gave her an earnest look.

“You're so dramatic” she rolls her eyes and goes to check the result and falls silent taking the test in hand.

“What? What is it?” you ask impatiently.

“Negative” she answers.

“Negative? Really?” you weren't convinced with the result as you looked at her with doubt in your eyes.

“Yeah” she confirms again.

“Oh that's a relief heh” you chuckle lightly “I told you before only it's just a stomach bug”

“You're upset that it's negative, aren’t you?” Vanessa gives you a knowing look.

“What? No I mean… yeah a little it wouldn't be bad you know but nevermind” you fiddle with your hands fumbling on your words.

“So you wanted a baby?” she raises her eyebrows questioningly.

“I mean yeah I love kids and wouldn't mind one of my own specially if it’s a cute little version of my husband running around the house on his little feet” you expressed your little desire.

“You sure?” she reasserts, raising her eyebrows as the corner of her mouth picks into a smile.

“Yeah but it doesn't matter anyways cause the test is negative as you said” you shrugged letting off the thought.

“Well then good news sissy it's actually positive” Vanessa smiles at you widely and you were taken aback.

“What?! You serious?” she nods, holding out the stick in front of you to see it yourself.

“Oh my god you bitch!” you gasp “who's dramatic now huh?” you scowl, hitting her arm lightly.

“Ow! At least I helped you figure out what you actually feel about the whole thing” she places her hands on your shoulders “congratulations sister you’re gonna have a baby!”

“I’m gonna have a baby” you repeat that to yourself. You still couldn’t believe that this was happening as you placed a hand gently over your stomach

“And I'm going to be an aunt. I’m so happy for you guys” she hugs you tightly but soon your face drops as you pull away from her with a worried expression.

“What happened? Why again the gloomy face?” Vanessa nudges you.

“I don’t want my baby to be part of this bloodshed. I have been trying to run away from this and here I’m again pushing my child right into that same hell hole” you rant with tears in your eyes.

“I think you need to first talk to Tom and then make a decision. You understand?” you nod “everything will be fine don’t worry” she pulls you in her embrace comforting you.

It was almost a week that you got to know you were pregnant but still you couldn’t break the news to Tom, you just didn’t have the nerves to do it yet.

****

You stood by the mirror glancing at your reflection though there wasn’t a visible bump but you still rubbed your hand over your belly. The thought of a life growing inside made your heart swell with warmth. Somehow you felt more livelier than you have ever been a certain glow emanating through your features. Maybe this is what people meant by pregnancy glow. You felt happy and content from inside out, you felt complete as if you had found the missing piece of your life. But you still had to tell Tom and the only person you could think of for some advice was your mom as you finally called her.

“Hi sweetie” your mother’s sweet voice comes from the other end.

“Hey mom”

“So what reminds my daughter about her old mother?” she snickers.

“Mom! you really think that I called for another favor” you grimace.

“Well you don't call much for me to think otherwise”

“C'mon mom you know my situation with dad”

“Yeah, yeah I'm just messing with you now, what’s the matter? you sound stressed” she observed.

“I... just really miss you” you sigh

“Sweetie, is everything alright?” she asks with concern.

“Yeah just wanted to hear your voice that’s all”

“I'm your mother Y/N, I can totally feel that something is bothering my little girl?”

“Mom, can I ask you something?” you say taking a deep breath.

“Anything honey”

“Were you scared when you first came to know that you were pregnant with me?”

“What?”

“I mean to say that I was totally unplanned and for my sake you had to marry that man so were you scared thinking about what your future will be in a crime family?”

“Well honestly I had little choice in that matter. I was stuck in the middle of the rivalry so in order to keep you safe I married him. But honey the day I held you in my arms all my fears went away. The only thing I know is that I can spend the rest of my life looking at you. You were never a mistake you were the best gift given to me”

“That's nice to hear” you smile

“But why after so many years you are bringing this up?”

“Nothing I just have somethings in my mind going on right now and it feels a lot” you try to shrug it off.

“Sweetie, what are you hiding from me?” she prods.

“Nothing mom I swear!” you exclaim.

“I know very well what this ‘nothing mom’ means c'mon tell me”

“Well I'm pregnant” you inform as you hear her gasp.

“What?! Oh my god I can't believe my ears, is this really true? This isn’t a prank right? Like you used to do when you were little”

“No mom it isn’t a prank” you reassure her lightly chuckling.

“Oh god I'm so happy for you honey. My little girl is going to be a mom herself? When did she grow so big?” she shrieks eyes welling up in happiness “Does Tom know?”

“Not yet” you inform.

“Not yet? Why what's wrong? Does he not want it?”

“No it’s nothing like that… actually I myself don’t know. This just happened so suddenly though I was thrilled initially but now I’m worried actually scared I-I don't think I will be a good mother. I mean my life is already a mess. I don't want to give this life to my child. They don't deserve this”

“Listen to me Y/N no one is perfect even I made mistakes too and that’s how we learn. How much ever you want to plan your life Y/N, it will always have a way of surprising you with unexpected things that will make you happier than you originally planned” she makes you understand “Tom is a nice guy I’m sure he’ll always be by your side. And I know my girl too and how much strong she is you have got this Y/N just believe in yourself and Tom”

“Thanks mom really needed to hear this from you”

“Anytime honey now take some rest and then tell everything to Tom, speak to you soon, love you”

“Love you too mom” you end the call feeling lighthearted as if a weight has been lifted off your chest. You grew up in a very dysfunctional family which made you yearn for a perfect happy family and when you have finally got it you’re not going to let anything mess it up at any cost.

****

The basement of your mansion was kind of Tom’s personal hell. He had particularly made it to held people captive for whoever dared to cross him and torture them to death. You were actually never allowed down there but today you got to join him. As you approached the room in the basement you heard screams and groans of a man in pain. Tom opened the door and you both stepped inside to find Ethan tied up in a chair beaten mercilessly barely conscious groaning in pain. His body was pale and face bruised with a black eye, nose bleeding, jaw swollen from the right temple down the cheek. Harrison was standing in front of him in a black tank top and jeans all worked up heaving in anger as you noticed his bloody knuckles. Two other lackeys were also present to help him with the interrogation.

“Haz anything so far?” Tom asks, lighting up a cigarette.

“Nothing till now this bastard won't speak up” he mutters, grabbing a fistful of Ethan’s silky black hair and tugging it harshly. Tom stalks towards him and bents down blowing the smoke on his face

“Well mate you have to speak up some or the other time” he smirks with a condescending tone.

“Over my dead body” Ethan grits under his teeth glaring at him.

“Sooner or later you are gonna end up dead anyways but not before you tell us everything you know about the rest of the viper gang”

“You think you can torture me to disclose everything” he snickers weakly “nah you have got the wrong man dude. You gotta do lot more than this”

“You know what Ethan? I'm not good with patience so the sooner you speak up the sooner you get your sweet death”

“And I think I’ve got the time of the world” he laughs tauntingly “why don’t you ask your wife to do it? Maybe she can seduce everything out of me like the pathetic whore she is” he slurs at you with a mocking tone. Tom clenches his jaw as his hands balled into tight fists and in no time he lands a punch right at his jugular as he coughs up blood.

“Watch your bloody mouth!” Tom growls, grabbing him by his collar “you really don’t know how tempted I am to cut you into pieces one by one as I watch you slowly bleed to death” he mutters, looking at him with malice in his eyes.

The scene in front of you wasn’t that pleasant though you’re used to it but with the raging pregnancy hormones everything seemed heightened for you. The room began to feel stuffy as you found it difficult to breathe adding to that the raunchy putrid smell of blood mixed with the smell of nicotine in the room swept through your nose which made your stomach churn and you tasted bile. The urge to throw up grew strong for you to hold it any longer. You grabbed your mouth, letting out a muffled "excuse me" you ran upstairs to your room.

“Y/N?” Tom lets go of Ethan and calls you back worriedly as everyone’s attention turns to you.

“You go check I can handle this” Harrison assures exchanging glances with Tom as he nodded and sprinted off to your bedroom. He finds the bathroom locked as he hears gagging noises from inside.

“Y/N, love you alright?” He knocks on the door

“Yeah I'm fine” you answer before throwing up again. When you were sure that there’s nothing left for you to throw up you stepped out of the bathroom face flushed and exhausted. Tom hastily went to hold your hand.

“Oh my god are you ok?” he gasps lightly

“Yes Tom I’m fine don’t worry” you tell him

“You don't look fine to me” he drapes a hand around your shoulders and slowly walks you towards the bed and makes you sit down.

“Tom it's ok”

“Y/N we need to go see a doctor now” he insists.

“No, no it’s fine a little rest will be enough for me”

“I’m not listening to anything, wait I-I’m calling the doctor at home only” he fumbles pulling out his phone from his pocket to make a call.

“Tom, relax! It's totally normal in the first months of pregnancy” you exclaim

“What?!” Tom frowns as your eyes go wide realizing your slip up “Did you just say pregnancy?” he reiterates.

“Yes” you sigh standing up “I'm pregnant….with our child” you reveal placing your hand over your belly and Tom’s expression changed into a mix of shock and happiness.

“What? You're serious? You-you aren't kidding right?”

“Do I seem to be in the state of joking?” you raise your eyebrows unamused.

“Yeah, yeah right” he mumbles to himself as he processes the news and soon after excitement takes over him “Oh god Y/N this is such great news!” He lifts you up and does a little spin.

“Oh my god Tom put me down!” you squeal

“Oh I’m sorry” he puts you down “I’m just so excited. When did you get to know?”

“A week ago” you said meekly.

“And you didn't tell me? Why?” you felt a little intimidated under his questioning gaze. Even before you could say something he made his own assumption.

“Wait, you don't want this, is that why?” he looks at you with dreaded eyes

“No, No, no that's not what it is?” you shake your head vigorously in disapproval “you have got it all wrong”

“Then what is it Y/N?” he asks you softly.

“It's actually the opposite. I was just scared as it was totally unplanned and with all this going on with my father you are already tensed. I wasn’t sure how you would react” you rambled.

“Oh darling” he breathes out cupping your face gently with his broad hands “you don't know today you have made me the happiest man on this fucking world. This is everything I wanted honey. You, me and our perfect little happy family” you smiled at him as he carefully placed his hands on your belly.

“How far are you? Is everything normal? Are you both ok?” he badgered you with questions.

“I... actually thought you would come with me on my first checkup” you looked at him bashfully “it's-it's just I wanted you to be there with me if you aren't too busy”

“Of course love, no work is more important than you and my little one” he beams with joy. Tom didn’t waste a second to call at the hospital to schedule your appointment.

“Mr. and Mrs. Holland” the nurse calls out

“Yes?” you both respond standing up from your seats.

“Dr. Martin is ready to see you” she informs and leads you inside the room.

“Please lie down” she instructs and you follow by lying down on the examination chair while Tom sits on the chair beside you. The nurse then leaves the room and soon after the doctor arrives. She was a middle aged woman and looked quite experienced as she greeted you warmly.

“Hello Mrs. Holland, I’m Dr. Martin”

“Hello doctor” you smiled courteously.

“So how are you feeling today?”

“I feel fine, doctor, just a little bit tired...” you were quickly cut off by Tom

“No doctor she got really sick and nauseous the other day” he puts forth his concern.

“Morning sickness is normal at this time Mr. Holland. There’s nothing to worry about” she reassures him.

“See?” you whisper with a knowing glare. Tom still wasn’t convinced but let it go for now.

“Ready to have a first look at your baby?” she asks cheerfully as you nod, lifting your shirt up. She rubbed the cool gel on your lower stomach while Tom held your hand tightly. Then she switches the monitor on and runs the tool on your belly. A hazy black and white image appears on the screen as the room fills with the rhythmic beeping of heartbeat. You and Tom stare at the monitor in awe.

“You see right here?” the doctor points at the middle of the screen with a pen.

“Awww that's our baby” you squeeze Tom's hand gently, a stray tear of joy rolls down your cheek. Tom was himself brimming with emotions, he knelt down and kissed your forehead with adoration as you noticed London’s most feared mobster’s eyes wet.

“I can already pick the heartbeats” she reveals further as you both give her a puzzled look.

“Heartbeats? As in plural” Tom asked in shock.

“Yeah two heartbeats” she confirms “you're going to have twins Mrs. Holland” she adds. You gasped and smiled instantly feeling giddy and overwhelmed at the news.

“We're gonna have twins” you looked up at him with a sparkle in your eyes.

“Yes we are, love” a wide smile spread across his face “you gotta admit I did a really good job in there though” he whispers cockily and there he was back again in his usual self.

“Tom!” you glared, squeezing his hand tightly.

“Ow! Sorry, sorry” he chuckles when you both were interrupted as Dr Martin began to speak again.

“You are approximately 8 weeks and all parameters seem to be normal. The babies are growing fine, nothing to worry about. After 10 weeks we can identify the genders” she elucidates “But you have to be extra careful as you are a new mom and with twins. Everything will be doubled for you so maintaining a proper diet, getting a good amount of sleep is very important. No heavy lifting and most importantly no stress at all as it directly affects the babies. The expectant mother should always be happy” she advises.

“We’ll keep that in mind doc thank you so much” Tom acknowledges her.

“Well then I’ll see you on your next check up. Do you want the prints of the ultrasound?”

“Yes please” you both said together.

“Ok I’ll get it right away”

On the way back home the whole ride Tom kept rambling about how everything needed to be baby proofed and keep everything ready as if you are going to labor tomorrow itself. He even suggested that he shift your bedroom downstairs so that you don’t have to climb up the stairs. You had to literally ask him to shut up and relax that you have seven more months to go.

****

You were about to get off the bed when Tom came in with a huge tray of food.

“Good morning love” he went and sat in front placing the tray on his lap as you looked at the amount of food which was double than you usually have.

“What's all this Tom?” you ask frowning.

“Breakfast in bed”

“I can see that but is this a breakfast for a giant? What's with these enormous portions?” you pointed out.

“If I may remind you, you are now eating for three so you have to eat accordingly”

“In no way I'm going to eat that much” you stated firmly

“But darling…”

“Nope, not happening. I said no means no” you shake your head side to side “I don’t want to get fat because after a few I’m gonna be all big and round anyways and then you wouldn't look at me” your hormones getting the best of your insecurities as you rambled without much thinking.

“Hey look at me” he holds your chin between his index and thumb fingers making you look at him “you seriously think that? You. will. always. be. the prettiest woman for me do you understand?” he asks as you nod “I bet you are going to be the most beautiful mom. Our kids are lucky to have a fearless, confident woman like you as their mother” he says looking deep into your eyes “and I can’t wait to see you all big and round” he adds smiling.

“But I’m still not gonna eat all of it”

“Ok you can eat as much you can no pressure” he assures you as you take the fruit bowl in your hand and start to munch on the fruits one by one going into a deep thought.

“Now what is going on in that mind of yours?” he asks breaking you out of your thoughts.

“I think we should tell everyone I mean your mom and dad then the boys they would be thrilled to know”

“So you wanna invite them over lunch?” he offers.

“Yeah that will be really nice”

****

Tom’s family arrived on time, after lunch all of you gathered in the living room as you and Tom stood in the middle. Everyone looked at you both expectantly though Tom’s dad had a disinterested look like all times.

“Sorry for the short notice but this was kind of important and we were really excited to share this news with you” you started.

“Did the police catch your father?” Harry asks out of nowhere

“That would have been really nice but unfortunately no”

“Then what is it?” Harrison asks impatiently.

“Well….we’re pregnant” you both announce.

“What?!” everyone collectively gasped.

“Is it true?” Nikki looked between you two

“Yes mum” Tom confirms bashfully wrapping a hand around your waist and pulling you closer.

“Oh my god this is such good news” she gets up to you and takes your hands in hers “I’m so happy for you” she cradles the side of your face lovingly.

“Finally I'm going to get to see the face of my grandson, my heir. That's some good news after all huh” Tom’s dad remarks with gruff in his voice as Nikki looks at you apologetically.

“Actually dad, we're going to have twins,” Tom added.

“Well that’s good, can't wait to meet my grandsons as they’re going to take over our business in future” he said still emphasizing on having a son and honestly neither you nor Tom wanted your twins to join the mob.

“Oh dear now that’s something big” Nikki tries to lighten the mood “I remember when I was with Harry and Sam it was a lot of cravings and mood swings get ready for it Tom” she snickers as she starts to give you some helpful tips to make everything a little easier for you as this is your first time.

“Congratulations bro” Harrison goes and hugs Tom tightly.

“Thanks man”

“So I’m gonna be the godfather I assume?” he asks.

“Well we’re yet to decide that” Tom snickers.

“What? C’mon man I’m your best friend and I’m going to be the godfather, that’s final. I know Y/N is still angry at me which by the way is your fault but I’ll manage her” he states confidently

“Good luck with that,” Tom laughs. Everyone left after sometime leaving you both all by yourselves in your house. Tom turns to smiling.

“What?” you ask.

“Close your eyes,” he says.

“Why?” you look at him skeptically

“You still don’t trust me don’t you?”

“No” you quip with a smirk.

“Just close your eyes please I have something to show to you” he pouts with puppy eyes

“Okay” you close your eyes “happy?”

“Yes now come with me”

“Where are you taking me?” you ask again.

“You’ll see soon” he takes your hand and carefully guides you up the stairs. He brings you in front of a room with a large wooden door and slowly clicks the door open.

“Now open your eyes” he whispers softly into your ears. You flutter your eyes open to be awestruck as you look inside the room. It was a nursery for your twins. You looked at everything with wide eyes, two twin cribs situated in the middle with cute plushies in it, the walls painted in soft pastel gender neutral shades, the lighting of the room well coordinated making it look warm and cozy. An armchair for you to take rest.

“How is it?” Tom's voice breaks you out of your thoughts.

“Tom, it’s-it’s beautiful” you breathe out “but when did you?” you looked at him quizzical

“Well as soon as you told me I called in some favors and had this room renovated” he reveals to you.

“It's-it's really beautiful Tom” you walked further into the room towards the cribs. Brushing your hand over the wooden railings you picked up the baby towel and rubbed it against your cheek feeling the soft texture.

“Sorry I don't have much idea about all this stuff, I just tried my best to make it as comfortable for you three. If you want anything else just tell me I'll get it done” he says scratching the back of his neck.

“Tom, it's perfect. You did a great job. I love it” you take his hand and place it over your belly “and they are gonna love it too” you reassure him.

“I installed a music system too” he adds, turning on the music as he wraps his hands around your waist and sways gently to the music “it's said that listening to calming music helps during this time”

“Someone has been busy reading I see” you tease.

“Well I just want to be there for you guys” he shrugs nonchalantly.

“Aww where did this softy come from? What did you do to my terrifying ruthless mobster husband?” you joke laughing.

“Haha very funny” he scoffs when you finally notice the lyrics of the song.

“Is this our wedding song?” you ask with a knowing smile.

“Yep”

I know you haven't made your mind up yet But I would never do you wrong I've known it from the moment that we met No doubt in my mind where you belong

“Did I ever tell you how bloody gorgeous you looked that day? Just like an angel from the heavens”

“Oh shut up!” you blushed, hitting his chest playfully.

“What? I’m serious” he laughs “couldn’t take my eyes off you”

“Well you didn’t look bad either” you snicker resting your head on his chest “that was such a long time ago isn’t it?”

“Hmm” he hums

“If anybody had told me that we will end up like this I would have never believed it at all” you chuckle at the memories of the numerous heated arguments you had with each other. But now you find solace in each other's arms.

“We have come a long way” he sighs as you feel him tense under you. Something was still bothering him, you knew it for sure.

“Wanna sit down?” you posed

“No it’s fine I’m not tired”

“Well I am pregnant with twins you know heh” he lets go of you and you go and sit on the floor near the cribs back resting against them. You pat on the empty spot beside you urging him to sit down too. He comes and sits down tilting his head on your shoulder as you run your fingers through his soft brown curls.

“I needed to say something to you” he finally lets out.

“Go on I’m listening”

“Don't mind my dad's words I don't care if they are girls or boys I just want you three to be healthy and safe” he says as you go to kiss his forehead lovingly “If you ask me personally I would be thrilled to have two mini Y/Ns” he add.

“Careful what you wish for Mr. Holland you don’t want thrice the trouble do you?” you chuckle.

“Gladly Mrs. Holland” he laughs before turning all gloomy again “do you think they would like me?”

“You are their father Tom they would always love you”

“But what if they don't? What if they hate me when they come to what kind of man their dad is and everything he has done in his life?” he rambles.

“Tom as the eldest son you didn't have a choice they would surely understand” you try your best to make him understand.

“I don't know Y/N, you know my dad wasn't that present for us. It was just us and mum. And when time came all of a sudden I was accompanying him killing people and beating them to death. I want to change that I want to be there for them, for you in every step of your life and most importantly I don’t want that life for them” he rants out.

“Honey, you wanting to do things right has already made you the best father in the world. They are gonna be so proud of their daddy” you cradle his face affectionately.

“You know what, I'm going to stop doing all the illegal trades” he blurts out.

“What do you mean?” you frown at him.

“Means no more shark loaning, extortion, gambling, contract killing everything, everything that's against the laws. I have already made a lot of enemies” he places a hand on your stomach “and I'm not gonna let them inherit this curse too. I need to cut off my ties with the underworld”

“But what about your dad I don't think he would agree with and your brothers then Harrison?”

“Dad will be angry I'm sure of that but Harrison, Sam and Harry would understand. I want to make sure that you all are safe and no more hiding skeletons in the closet” he gives you a determined look as you smile.

“Do whatever is necessary I'll always be there by your side cause I love you”

“I love you too” he says back as your lips meet softly into a chaste kiss.

I could make you happy, make your dreams come true Nothing that I wouldn't do Go to the ends of the Earth for you To make you feel my love To make you feel my love

****

You woke up the next morning hearing some commotion outside your room. You could hear Tom yelling at his men judging by the tone he was furious.

“What?!” he was shocked “how did this happen?! And what were you morons doing at that time?!”

“Sir-sir” the men stuttered in fear.

“I don't want to hear a fucking word from your mouths! Go and find him now or I'll kill you” he threatens “now get out of my sight!” meanwhile, you slip off the bed and put on your robe before stepping out of your room.

“Tom is everything alright” you ask with a worried expression.

“Oh I'm sorry darling did I wake you up? It’s nothing, go back to sleep there will be no more disturbance” he pretends to act like everything is ok.

“Tom, stop lying, what is it? What has happened?” you enquire.

“Nothing darling I promise” he tries his best to convince you but you weren’t buying any of it.

“You're not gonna tell me? fine! I'll go and find out myself” you glower at him.

“Y/N no wait you” he stops you, catching hold of your hand.

“Then tell me what it is?�� you demand with a serious look on your face.

“Ethan escaped”

..................................................................................

Taglist in bio.

#tom holland #tom holland imagines #tom holland smut #tom holland fluff #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #mob! tom holland #mob! tom

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perriewinklenerdie · 3 years

Text

Job interview (Ethan Ramsey x MC)

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x Claire Herondale

Word count: 1,5 k

Summary: Landry Olsen goes to speak to the Head of the Diagnostic Team in hopes of working in Ethan Ramsey's team.

Warnings: None

A/N: Just Landry being Landry. And my two idiots being in love - this time with actual words being said. Also, Ethan being protective and proud - you know, like a husband.

Landry Olsen walked the halls of Bloom Edenbrook with his head held high. After two years of being gone, he felt a familiar feeling of pride at the sight of rooms and staff, no matter how many changes have taken place.

The news of a job opening in the Diagnostic Team flooded the medical community, reaching the doctors of Solomon Kenmore. In particular, Landry Olsen. It was like his dream came true once more, like he got a second chance at this.

Since his residency ended, he knew for sure that Claire’s residency was over too. For an opening in the team to happen now? It couldn’t have been a coincidence – she must have packed her bags and left, leaving a space for him to fill. Leaving him a chance to finally work by Ethan Ramsey’s side and prove to him that he was a better doctor between him and his former friend.

That’s what brought him to Edenbrook. He didn’t think to check, so blinded with his pride that he strutted to the nurse’s station, asked where the new DT office was and, as soon as he got the confirmation that the head of the team was in, walked towards the place that would grant him a new start for his career.

He straightened his shirt, shaking in anticipation to see his medical hero, sitting behind the desk, waiting for him to give him his resume – waiting for Landry to join the team, like he should have done two years ago.

A screeching sound of an alarm blared in his ears when he stepped through the door and casted his gaze onto the figure sitting behind the desk. They were hunched over a chart, drumming the pencil against the smooth surface under their palm. Their coat was draped over the back of the chair they were sitting on, completely in their element – like they owned the place.

At the sound of the steps, they spoke up. “Ethan, babe, you’re early, you said you’d be here in ten minutes- “ Claire lifted her gaze from the lines of patient information and moved it towards the person standing two meters from her. “Oh.”

They stared at each other in silence, neither sure what to do. Landry’s brain didn’t register the term of endearment she used in regards to Ethan Ramsey, too shocked by seeing her in the room to notice the additional information.

“I didn’t expect to see you here.” He managed to spit out, shaking himself off mentally. She raised an eyebrow.

“Who did you expect to see? You knew I was in the team, Landry.”

“I heard about an opening in the team, and since our residencies are over, I figured that… you’d leave.” He explained, shrugging as though his line of thought was the sanest thing in the world. Claire nodded slowly, sending him a strange look.

“I see. And, well, as you can see, that’s not the case. As a matter of fact-“

“That’s the last time I let you choose our lunch option, Claire. The traffic could not have been worse.” Ethan’s voice interrupted her as he walked into the room. At the sight of a faintly familiar face, he stopped in his tracks. Only for a moment, though, because he resumed his stride pretty much immediately, joining Claire behind her desk, their food in hand. He put the boxes down, then kissed her forehead warmly.

“That’s bullshit and you know it. Besides, why couldn’t you just order? They would have delivered it, no problem.” She grinned, leaning back in her seat.

“No problem, huh? I’ll remind you of how much it’s not a problem the next time you want those cookies that they do not deliver.” He nodded towards the smaller bag on the side. She gasped, touching her chest theatrically.

“Oh my god, I love you.”

“As I love you.” Ethan replied without missing a beat, his eyes softening as he smiled at his girlfriend.

At that moment, Landry Olsen cleared his throat. The couple looked at him at once, as though they only now remembered that they had company – neither embarrassed by the situation, though.

“Right.” Claire cleared her throat, turning in her seat to face him again. “As I was saying, I didn’t leave.”

“If you didn’t leave, then who did?” Landry asked, confused beyond measure. The next words wrecked his world and he felt ground slipping from under his perfect little vision of his future.

“I did.” Ethan spoke up, leaning against the desk. He nudged Claire’s arm with his knee, winking at her, both smiling.

“So… who’s the team leader now?” He stuttered, not for the first time in the past ten minutes, unable to understand what was happening.

“I am.” Claire raised her chin confidently, her posture straightening. “So, if you still want to discuss the opening in the team with its leader, that would be me.”

Olsen looked between the couple, the reality of their relationship suddenly catching up to him. The kiss, the love confession, their closeness – all like a slap to the face, all confirming what he already knew years ago.

“I… you two- but I- “

“I don’t think he’s a good fit, if I’m being honest.” Ethan shared his opinion, turning towards her. “You’re the boss here, so the decision is yours, but he doesn’t look like he’d be able to get much done. Well.” He gave the younger doctor a dirty look, well aware of what he’s done in the past. “Maybe except for sabotaging his coworkers.”

Landry paled. He wanted to run but his body froze, and he couldn’t move a finger. Memories of the conversation he had with Claire when she realized what he’s been doing came back to him immediately. He still stood by his point – a resident leading a team? In what universe would that be happening? He opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came out.

Ethan smirked at the sight, shaking his head at the younger man. He turned towards Claire and dropped his voice to a mutter. “I’ll wait for you in my office.” With a kiss to her cheek, he gathered their food and moved towards the door.

“You gave her the team because you’re sleeping with her?” Landry finally spit out, his voice pitchy and cracked. Ethan stopped immediately, turning around to reveal the stone-cold look on his face.

“I invite you to say it again and make an even bigger idiot out of yourself.” If looks could kill, Landry Olsen would be a pile of ash from how fiery Ethan Ramsey’s gaze was. “Go on, say that again.” When no other words were said, he scoffed. “That’s what I thought. You have nothing going for yourself, so you resort to bringing others down to hide your own incompetence. Truly touching. Now do us both a favor and go back to the place you came from so I can enjoy my lunch break with my girlfriend in peace.”

He glanced at Claire, his expression melting into a tender smile. “Come to my office once you’re done here.” She nodded, a barely visible gesture. He turned around, leaving the room without sparing Landry another look.

She stared at her former friend for a long minute, waiting for him to say something. When he didn’t, she sighed, deciding to take the high road. “Would you like some water?”

Landry shook his head, taking a step back. He apologized after what felt like forever, then bid her goodbye and began to leave the office. He ran into Tobias and Harper, dropping his gaze to the ground when he passed them by to avoid embarrassing himself any further. The last thing he heard before he got too far away was Tobias’s taunting voice.

“Aw, man, Ramsey said it would get good. We always miss the fun, Harps.” He nudged Harper with his elbow, both of them laughing. Claire joined in, standing up and reaching for her sweater.

“We come here to spend out lunch break with the boss and the boss is leaving?” Harper teased her playfully, knowing damn well where Claire was going. The blonde shrugged innocently.

“Sorry, guys, my boyfriend just destroyed the guy that sabotaged me two years ago. He earned some kisses at the very least.” She walked backwards, grinning. “Not to mention that he has my food. See you in a bit!”

Harper giggled at their dynamic, her shoulders shaking as Tobias reached for a piece of paper, formed the ball and then threw it at Claire. “Lock the door when you get there!”

Notes

Claire: “Would you like some water?”

Perrie: “For your newly obtained burns?”

I’ve wanted to write some Landry-being-roasted fic again for a while now, and this just jumped at me today. A splitsecond decision was made and here we are.

Long story short, I have absolutely no time to write, but I write anyway. I’m probably gonna die because of this, so it’s been fun guys <3

Jk, but not really. I’m probably going to be gone for a while because of my finals. I’ll be back as soon as possible, and in the meantime, I’m going to be here, reading and praising our Queens for giving us the content we need after OH ended.

Thank you so much for being here with me for the entirety of the OH journey, having you here means more than I can express.

See you on the other side of the war. Literally.

Love you guys so much, thank you for reading <3

Tagging separately

#open heart #ethan ramsey #playchoices #ethan x mc

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jamespotterthefirst · 3 years

Note

Queen Bree HC please for dad Ethan and literally everyone drooling for him. And of course, Lilac, too.

Anon, thank you so much for this! I hope I did okay!

First Grade Field Trip (Headcanons)

It's ridiculous how many PTA parents and teachers try to persuade him to chaperone the field trip to the kids' museum

The morning of, Lilac teases him and tells him it's because he's too good looking for his own good

Ethan has gotten better about teasing her back throughout the years so he pulls her to him from behind and kisses her neck. Then, he tells her, "I'd ask you to go instead but some of those parents are just as crazy about you."

Lilac rolls her eyes and teases, "So you're taking the bullet for me? What a gentleman."

But little Dolores, nicknamed Lolly, is at the table, eating the pancakes her mother made (because her father is good at a lot of things but NOT making pancakes.) She hears her father suggest that her mom go to the field trip instead

And no offense to her mom but she prefers it so much better when her dad goes

"You have to come with us, Dad!" she protests. "No one explains the science displays better than you."

Lilac feigns offense but she gets it. Ethan used to take her on museum dates all the time and whenever she wasn't trying to distract him with very passionate make-out sessions, she did find his insight interesting.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," Ethan assures her, ruffling her hair slightly. "If I'm not there to explain the difference in Upper Jurassic rock formations, then who? Noah's dad?"

Father and daughter snort at that ridiculous notion.

They spend the next fifteen minutes fixing and packing their lunch (brie cheese, baguetta, crackers, prosciutto, cashews, cucumbers, grapes, dried apricots, and chocolate-covered cherries. Ethan calls it a charcuterie to-go. Lilac calls it grown-up Lunchables.)

While Lilac drops the twins off at day care and heads into work, Ethan, Jonah, and Dolores set off to school.

The effect is immediate when they arrive.

Ethan rarely drops the kids off but when he does, he attracts attention.

Jonah is used to it and only sighs

Dolores wonders why everyone looks at her Dad with such interest.

Ethan is lasered focused on dropping his son off at his classroom before he meets Lolly's class by the buses.

Jonah's teacher actually chokes on her coffee when she sees Ethan. She recovers hastily, though her face is bright red and she stumbles on her words.

Lolly's teacher is much older, and as such, much subtler. Though Ethan has caught her quietly assessing him with approval.

They board the bus and Ethan is way too tall for it. He would have preferred to drive to the museum but his daughter insisted they go on the bus. And who can say no to the face?

Lolly sits with her friend, Charlotte, and Ethan has to find a seat nearby.

Several of the single moms look up hopefully.

One even makes her kid find a different seat.

Ethan finds an empty row and much to his relief, another parent (Noah's dad) comes to his rescue by sitting next to him. It turns out the guy is actually pretty decent.

But Ethan's worries are far from over.

The single moms follow him like vultures, feigning interest as he explains the Muscular System in the rock climbing section.

“It was awful nice of you to help us chaperone,” one of them says when she manages to get his attention at lunch.

Ethan doesn't smile, merely nods once. “My wife was busy today, otherwise it would have been her.”

The woman bristles slightly at the mention of his wife. Which is ridiculous because the gossip among the parents is widespread. Everyone knows Lilac and Ethan are happily married.

“There's nothing that comes before my children. I have to ensure their safety during field trips.”

Ethan doesn't miss the implication.

“I understand,” he returns dryly. “But then again, you're not a world renowned doctor who has to meet a deadline for her upcoming book.”

“Yeah,” Dolores adds cheerfully from a seat nearby. “Mommy is famous!”

The PTA mom, whose name Ethan did not bother to catch, gives them a forced, almost pained smile before getting lost.

Despite the speed at which gossip travels, some of his admirers are not deterred by the less than pleasant encounter.

One of them catches Ethan by surprise when she compliments his hair.

Ethan doesn't breathe a sigh of relief until later that day, when they're finally back at home recounting their day to Lilac.

“Oh!” Dolores adds as the excited conversation draws to a lull. “Jenny's mom told Daddy she liked his hair.”

Lilac raises an eyebrow. “Did she now?”

Ethan blushes.

“Yeah! She said it like you say it sometimes.”

Seductively. But Lolly is too young to know that.

Lilac lifts her gaze to meet Ethan's.

“And what did Daddy say?”

“He said 'thank you!'” Lolly supplies.

Ethan opens his mouth to explain under Lilac's expectant gaze.

“I was... not expecting that. It caught me off guard.”

Lilac's eyebrows only climb higher up her forehead.

Later when Lolly goes off to play with her siblings, Lilac says, “Jenny's mom is desperate.”

“It was—”

“And a liar.”

“Pardon?”

“Your hair is ridiculous.”

Ethan blinks.

Then he smirks.

He can tell she's joking, but despite the jest, she is still a tiny bit jealous. With a laugh, he pulls her close, her back against his chest. “That’s not what you said last night.”

“I say a lot of things when my mind is elsewhere.”

“Namely on my mouth and what it had the pleasure of doing.”

She turns in his embrace, finally joining in his laughter.

He kisses her because she's crazy if she thinks there'd ever be anyone else

Notes: LMAO this might as well have been a fic. Oh well. I don’t know how to do HC and that this point I’m afraid to ask.

Thank you for reading if you made it this far!

___________________

Perma Tags (All Works/Edits)

@openheart12, @takeharryandgo , @aestheticartsx, @rookie-ramsey , @utterlyinevitable, @doilooklikeiknow, @snesdudes, @paulfwesley, @nikki-2406, @mvalentine, @casey-v, @blossomanarchy, @rookieoh, @lucy-268, @maurine07, @bellcat2010 , @iemcpbchoices , @potionsprefect , @heauxplesslydevoted , @writinghereandthere , @schnitzelbutterfingers , @gryffindordaughterofathena , @lovingramsey , @udishaman , @forallthatitsworth , @canigetanawwjunk, @thegreentwin , @blainehellyes , @parkerattano , @lady-calypso , @nazarihoe , @rookiemarsswiftie , @queencarb , @fayeswiftie , @trappedinfanfiction , @alina-yol-ramsey , @chasingrobbie , @ashiiknees , @professorkingslay , @whimsicallywayward15 , @mysticalgalaxysstuff , @bluebellot , @sophxwithers , @interobanginyourmom , @mercury84choices , @drariellevalentine , @caroldxnvxrs, @gardeningourmet , @enmchoices, @ethanrcmsey, @choices-lurker, @beebubbly, @irisofpurple, @queenrileyrose , @checkurwindow , @codykosuckmytoe, @choiceskatie , @dorisz, @glamtori, @lsvdw-blog, @anntoldst0ries , @itsjustwinter, @natureblooms24, @mainstreetreader, @imnazarihoe , @messrprongs

Except Bryce x MC: @openheartthot , @casey-v , @binny1985 , @tsrookie, @perriewinklenerdie , @drakewalkerfantasy , @choices-lurker , @uneravine , @danijimenezv ,

@choicesfanaf (except Bryce x MC/ Blaine x MC)

Open Heart- Ethan x f!MC Only

@octobereighth, @helloblueeyedcat , @genevievemd , @stygianflood , @ohchoices, @choicesaddict5 , @aworldoffandoms, @mysticaurathings , @myusualnerdyself , @ruinedbypixels, @custaroonie, @jooous, @aarisa-frost, @oldminniemcg , @toadfrog26 , @honeyandsunfl0wers , @jens-diamondchoices , @nooruleman , @choicesreal , @anastasiaxsworld , @stateofgracious , @vi-writes-stuff , @panda9584 , @imrookieramsey , @shanzay44 , @actuallybored , @iloveethanramsey , @kimmienen , @numiiworld , @sarah-carina , @headoverheelsforramsey , @coffeeheartaddict, @silma-words , @choicest , @estellaelysian, @tinkertailorsoldierspy, @somersetmummy, @mayarambles, @starryeyedrookie , @chaoticchopshopheart, @writer-ish

@ink-spilled-stars, @smilex1104, @whenyourheartskipsabeat, @kalinahonore, @wingedhairstylemusicweasel, @pixelnutrookie, @edgiestwinter, @pixelnutrookie, @sweetheartdetectivex @chemist-ana, @emmasumbrella

@riyana, @quixoticdreamer16, @mrs-ramsey, @mypsychiccroissantshark

#ethan ramsey #ethan x mc #open heart #playchoices #Headcanons #my writing

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sour--disposition · 3 years

Text

Across The Miles

harry lewis x fem!reader

please check my masterlist to see if my requests are open

(gif from the amazing @sdmngifs)

You stepped off the plane and were met with the dreary skies that seemed to always plague England. Simon had told you he and JJ would meet you outside of the baggage claim to help you with your bags and take you home.

As soon as you’d wrestled your cases off of the conveyer belt, you walked towards the big exit sign, looking very much like you’d just stepped off of a long haul flight. Donned in sweats and a Sidemen Clothing hoodie with a travel pillow hung around your neck, you weren’t going to be winning any fashion awards any time soon.

“Y/N!”, JJ and Simon called from the other side of the large arrivals hall. You grinned, waving manically at them as you walked over as quick as you could. You dropped you hand luggage down next to your cases and flung your arms around both of them.

“I’ve missed you guys!”, you smiled up at them once they’d released you. “I can’t thank you enough for giving me this opportunity. And letting me live with you guys? I mean... there isn’t enough words to thank you!”, you gushed.

You’d met Simon, JJ and the rest of the Sidemen at the 2017 Upload event and had stayed in touch with them ever since. You’d been planning on moving in together for quite a while, but finding a time when the three of you were free enough to facilitate moving an entire human and her belongings across the Atlantic Ocean was harder than first imagined, but the minute that the three of you had decent schedules, flights were booked, you’d handed your notice in for your apartment in New York and started packing up your things.

By the time you’d been moved into the spare room, your room, it was nearing 5pm. “We were thinking about grabbing dinner with the rest of the guys? They’ve all missed you and I know Freya and Talia are dying to see you”, Simon said from the door frame.

“Yeah, sounds good”, you smiled from where you sat on the floor, surrounded by your clothes as you tried to organise them.

“You don’t have to do it all in one go. Why don’t you grab a shower and get changed and then you can have another go at this once were back from dinner?”, Simon suggested, the exhaustion from the day beginning to become clear on your face. You nodded, putting down whatever it was you were trying and failing to fold and took yourself off for a shower.

Of course, the guys took you to Nando’s. With there only being a handful of the restaurants in America, and none in New York, you made a point of going whenever you were in the UK. “Are you excited to see Harry?”, Simon poked at you from the drivers seat, glancing back at you in the rearview mirror.

“Wait, what!?”, JJ exclaimed from the passenger seat, struggling to turn around and face you in his seat. “What’s this then?”, he pestered, reaching out to shove against your knee.

“It’s nothing”, you said pointedly, glaring at Simon.

“Oi, so Simon knows and I don’t? Bit unfair”, JJ sassed, pulling a face at you.

“Simon knows nothing”, you told JJ. “He’s getting ideas in his head that I haven’t said anything about”, you said, eyeing Simon again.

“So, was I just supposed to ignore one of my best friends’ names popping up, literally non-stop, on one of my other best friend’s phone?”, Simon quipped, raising an eyebrow. “I’m just saying what I see, is all”, he shrugged.

“Okay, sue me, I’ve stayed in touch with Harry. Have you guys forgotten that I’ve literally just moved into the same city as all of you and your friends?”, you snipped.

Simon grumbled in defeat, all whilst JJ’s eyes followed the back and forth between the two of you. He sat there with a massive grin on his face, and you just knew that he wasn’t going to leave this alone over dinner.

When you walked into the restaurant, you were greeted by a round of hugs from all the guys, being given the eye by Simon and JJ when you looped your arms around Harry’s frame. You were hugged by Talia and Freya as well, when the guys finally let you go.

“It’s so good to finally see you again in person”, Freya beamed. “Discord and twitch just don’t do it after being friends for this long”, she pouted, eliciting a laugh from both you and Talia.

The group sat down at the table, smaller groups of people all chattering amongst themselves. “How was your flight?”, Harry asked from the opposite side of the table.

“It wasn’t too bad, I’m kinda used to it now, I guess? I mean, 8 hours is 8 hours so it was pretty dull, but I managed to get a few movies in”, you smiled.

“Oh yeah?”, he asked. “What did you watch? Am I gonna be disappointed?”, he asked you with a laugh.

“Of course you’ll be disappointed, you don’t like watching films”, you laughed happily. “I finally started chipping away at my Disney plus watchlist, so I watched Up and both of the Incredibles films”, you told him.

You kept chatting with Harry, along with Ethan, who was next to Harry, and Vik, who was next to you, until your food came. Once people had plates in front of them, chatter died down significantly, only the occasional comment here and there made itself known.

“He likes you too, you know”, Simon commented as he drove the three of you home. You’d been bundled into the backseat, wrapped up in JJ’s jacket as you were practically falling asleep on Vik’s shoulder.

“No, he doesn’t, Simon”, you denied sleepily, eyes drifting closed as you rested your head against the cold glass of the window.

“And how do you know that? He doesn’t even know that you like him, so how could he have turned you down?”, Simon asked.

“Because he’s Harry. I’m just some small timer from New York that you guys seemed to adopt after Upload”, you told him. “Look. I’ll get over it, I just need you to stop bringing it up so that I can actually forget about it and ignore the mushy feelings”.

As soon as Simon pulled the car to a stop, you climbed out and started making your way to the lift. You leaned heavily against the wall of the lift as it hurtled the three of you up to your floor. “Thanks for the coat, Jide”, you smiled tiredly, hanging the jacket up on a hook by the door. “I love you and all that, but I’m off to bed. My eyes are melting”, you groaned, waving your hand roughly in the direction of your room. Simon and JJ only laughed at you, wishing you a good night as you trudged down the hallway.

What you’d quite easily admitted in your half awake state wasn’t mentioned again, much to your relief. You got on with filming you ‘I’ve moved house!?’ videos and ‘Guess who I live with?’ clickbait titles. You started streaming more with the the girls, since you were finally in their timezone, and even dropped into the occasional Among Us stream with whoever was playing that night.

You settled into life in London well. You were surrounded by your friends and you doing what you loved with the people you loved. You’d felt more at home in the short months you’d lived in London than you ever had in New York. There was only one problem, though...

The Harry situation hadn’t resolved itself.

Which is why, when Simon came and asked you if you’d be in a video where he sets you up on a blind date, you couldn’t see a reason to turn it down. Worst case scenario, the date went horribly and Simon got a funny video of it. It wasn’t like you’d ever had to see the guy again.

You sat in front of the camera with Simon. “So, before I can send you on this blind date, I need to know what to look for”, he said.

“Erm - someone who’s funny, easy to get along with, can take a joke. Someone who won’t be intimidated or annoyed about me having quite a few male friends, someone who’s supportive of my career...”, you listed, trailing off when you realised who that described to a tee.

“And what do I need to avoid?”, Simon asked. If he had noticed any similarities of your description to Harry, he chose to keep his mouth shut about it.

“Someone thats going to be ashamed of me and my career or is going to want me to take my attention away from Youtube and Twitch. It’s one of the most important things in my life and I love what I do for a living and I’m so lucky that I get to do this for a living, so avoid someone that’s going to try and come between me and that, I guess”, you told Simon.

You knew that you weren’t going to find the love of your life doing this. It was more than likely going to be another single youtuber that Simon had roped into his video with the promise of a great video title and some decent content. But it would be nice to get dressed up nice and have an evening away from editing software or your stream deck.

Simon had told you where to go and when, he’d also told you to dress “all nice like”. He’d set the date up at a cocktail bar that you’d been wanting to visit since you’d moved to London. You only agreed to it once you confirmed that the expenses would be on him because top shelf liquor was on the bottom shelf in this place.

You picked out a dark green satin dress and paired it with some strappy silver heels. You took advantage of the opportunity and filmed yourself getting ready so that if things didn’t go too horrifically, you could post a ‘get ready for my blind date with me’.

Sitting down and chatting to the camera as you got ready took longer than you’d expected. You were rushing around, stressing about your Uber not being there quick enough to get you to the bar in time.

“I’ll drop you off”, JJ offered, already heading over to pick his keys up. “And that way, if he’s a weirdo, you don’t have to worry about waiting for another car to come get you”.

You climbed into the Porsche, thanking JJ for what might have been the fiftieth time since leaving the apartment. “You can stop saying thank you, Y/N. I offered”, he chuckled as he drove out of the parking garage. “You look lovely tonight, whoever Simon’s got you set up with is lucky”, he told you, sending you a genuine smile.

“Thank you, Jide”, you smiled. The rest of the car journey was shrouded in a comfortable silence, disrupted only by the radio. “I think it’s just around this corner”, you said, pointing out of the front window.

JJ pulled up by the bar and came around to help you out of the car, causing you to laugh. “You don’t have to escort me in, J”, you told him lightly. “Why are you acting like an over-protective dad?”, you whispered to him in a giggle.

“Just trust me”, he told you, rolling his eyes softly.

You kept your arm looped through JJ’s as he walked you down the pavement. As you neared the entrance to the bar, you saw a figure standing outside, looking around nervously. That must be him.

“Harry?”, you asked. You turned to JJ, “I think there’s been a mistake. I’m supposed to be on a blind date”.

“Surprise, I think”, Harry said awkwardly, scratching his arm.

“Look after her, Harry”, JJ told him sternly. JJ dropped a kiss to the side of your forehead. “Call me or Simon if either of you need anything, yeah?”, he said before he turned and walked back to his car, leaving you and Harry alone.

“I promise I’ll say something, I think I’m just still trying to process what’s going on”, you laughed awkwardly, fiddling with the strap of your clutch in your hands.

“I can maybe clear things up over a drink? Simon’s paying”, Harry said lightly, reaching his hand out to you. You smiled and nodded, letting him take your hand in his and guide you into the bar.

Once you’d got your drinks, Harry lead you to the terrace garden out the back. It was decorated with flowers and muted fairy lights, making for quite the romantic atmosphere. Harry pulled the tall chair out for you and held his hand out to help you up before walking to the other side of the table and sitting opposite you.

“I - uh. Basically, I asked Simon’s advice on how to ask you out and he said that whenever he brought me up around you, you shut him down. So he came up with this idea. I totally get it if you want JJ to come back and pick you up after this drink, I just couldn’t not try... at least once”, Harry said, sounding dejected as he finished.

You put your hand over Harry’s that rested on the table. “I won’t be calling JJ, Harry. I’m over the moon to be here”, you told him with a smile. “I only kept shutting Simon down because he’s been trying to interfere since the day I landed in London. I was convinced that you wouldn’t like me so I just tried to... I don’t know... get over it, I guess”, you told him. You could feel the blush creeping up your cheeks as you spoke, hoping it wasn’t too obvious.

“Why wouldn’t I?”, Harry asked quietly, rubbing his fingers over the back of your hand absentmindedly as he did.

“Are you kidding? You’re part of one of the biggest youtube groups, have a successful youtube channel, you’ve been someone for so long. And I’m just... what? A newbie who got adopted by the big boys in London. I never thought you could”, you said, voice dropping to a whisper.

“Y/N, you’re amazing”, Harry boasted. “You’re an amazing streamer and your youtube content is quality. Okay so I’ve been uploading longer? And? It doesn’t mean anything, Y/N. And believe it or not, I like the you I see off camera, you know”, Harry said shyly.

“I guess I owe Simon an apology then”, you smiled at Harry, who took your hand in his.

373 notes · View notes

houseof-harry · 4 years

Text

Missed You Too | G.D.

Part 3 of Hate You Too!!

A/N - hello!!!!! part 3 of my hyt series!!! v proud of this part tbh, and dropping it at 2:30 am bc I can’t keep it to myself any longer. lots of love as always pretty pls lmk what you think!!! (read the last part here) (amazing gif by @vintagedolan as per usual nothing but the best by the best)

Word Count - 8.8k

Warnings - the nasty as per usual, mentions of not a great family life

“Why have you been trying more vegan stuff?” Kacey asks as you walk down the refrigerated aisle of the grocery store. You’d just put egg replacer in your cart after examining it for five minutes.

You shrug, looking at the various food options as you pass by them. “I don’t know, I’ve just been intrigued by it lately I guess.”

“Is the boy who gives you the glow vegan?” You roll your eyes, because this has been Kacey’s way of not so subtly poking around in your life to figure out who made you cry. She’s only seen one person make you cry: your dad. So the fact that a ‘random kid’ has seemed to do it for you, she’s pushing hard.

Because it wasn’t just that night that got to you, it’s been almost every day since. For almost a week straight, you’ve been moping around and going through the motions of life because the thought of Grayson truly hating you was making you really fucking sad. And that’s terrifying.

You had been pretty good about hiding it, you thought, until Kacey knocked asking why you were crying when you didn’t know she’d gotten home from Ethan’s one day. And now she needed to know what caused you your pain.

So you told her it was a random kid you’d been talking to. She didn’t believe you for a second (rightfully so, it was a terrible lie) and she wouldn’t leave it alone. You loved her and her passion, but sometimes you wish she’d let it go.

“I don’t know if he’s vegan or not. Everyone’s cutting out animal products more and more these days and I thought it’d be cool to try it myself. Is that such a problem?” You snap at her and she just huffs and pipes down for the time being.

You guys make it to the produce section after venturing through the various aisles in complete silence. You’re inspecting peppers when she speaks up again.

“You can’t hide him from me forever, you know.”

“You really think I can’t?”

“Y/N, come on.” She nudges you, making you meet her eyes and you see the genuine concern in them.

You let out a breath, picking your peppers and putting them in the cart. “I don’t even know what’s going on in my head with all the shit that’s happened, how am I supposed to tell you?”

She frowns wrapping her arm around you in a bit of an awkward side hug, the cart sandwiching you against the various vegetables.

“Maybe talking it out with me will help? When did it start? When did you meet him?”

You purse your lips, not sure how much you’re willing to reveal to her. Because if we’re being honest, Ethan is going to hear about this. And if they put two and two together, Grayson will soon know you’re having all these feelings over him and that’s the last thing you could want.

“I’m not supposed to like him, that was never what we were to each other. I don’t like him, I don’t think. Or I didn’t. But when I pissed him off and he left? I don’t know why, but it just-” You shrug, sighing and grabbing the cart to keep walking around as your emotions quickly bubbled to the surface after being hidden deep within you for so long.

“Isn’t that what they always say, though? Love comes when you’re not looking for it.”

“Oh jesus Kacey,” you laugh, pausing to grab some onions. “I’m not in love.”

“Hey,” she holds her hands up in defense as she watches you bag the onions. “All I’m saying is I’ve never seen you so into someone before. Even when you talk about your exes you have less emotion than with this guy.”

You toss the onions in the cart before continuing to push it along. “But I shouldn’t be into him. I wasn’t into him. I can’t tell if I’m blocking my feelings down and that’s why I’m confused or-”

“That’s definitely the problem,” she laughs as she picks out the fruits she wants for the week.

You huff in annoyance because you know she’s right, but you don’t want to let that be true. “Maybe I just really like his dick.”

The old lady next you scowls before shaking her head and walking away. You and Kacey giggle with each other as your cheeks blush a bit.

“I don’t think any dick is that powerful. Not when vibrators exist - fuck no. You’ve got the feelings glow.”

“Stop, Kacey,” you groan, halting your movements to look at her. She raises her brow at you and crosses her arms. “I don’t have the feelings glow. You get that shit for someone you’re gonna love. I could never love this guy, I-” you shake your head and blink a few times to quell any frustrated tears that have popped up. “I can’t love him. He was a good fuck. Is a good fuck. In fact-”

Before Kacey can react, you’re phone from your sweatshirt and typing away.

“Y/N what are you doing?”

“Proving that’s all he is.” You lock your phone with a satisfied grin.

“What the fuck did you just do?”

“Set up a dick appointment. A no strings attached, feelings-less dick appointment.”

“With the guy?” At this point you’re speedwalking the cart to the check out with Kacey trailing behind while she tries to process your rather reckless actions.

“With the guy,” you confirm.

“You’re gonna regret this,” she warns.

You sigh, locking your phone again after seeing his response.

“Maybe.”

***

“You’re in a shlump dude.”

Grayson was cuddled deep into their couch, blankets all around him and an almost completely empty pint of vegan ice cream he had picked up the night before.

Ethan had just come in from a midafternoon run, his sweaty and bare chest heaving as he stood in front of his brother with his hands on his hips. They were polar opposites right now, and Grayson hadn’t even realized. Not until Ethan’s comment makes him look down at himself and back up.

He merely sighs, leaning forward to put the ice cream on the coffee table while Ethan watches.

“Is it the new soulmate of the month?”

Grayson looks down at his phone, no new notifications on his blank lock screen. He doesn’t realize that he’s zoned out until Ethan’s snapping in his face with a questioning look.

Grayson shakes his head, groaning and rubbing his hand over his face.

“Bro, I don’t know.” Ethan sits next to him, leaning back as he drinks some water. “She’s not-” he huffs, doing his best to collect his thoughts because he truly has no idea how to explain you or his situation to Ethan without revealing that it’s you. Because as much as he loved his brother, he knew Kacey knew about everything in Ethan’s life. And Ethan’s life is Grayson’s life, and vise versa. So it would only be a matter of time before Kacey knew and then you’d know and he had no idea how you’d react to him having any type of positive feelings towards you.

“Who is she?”

“You don’t know her,” Grayson is quick to respond, almost too quick, but luckily Ethan doesn’t push it.

“What’s so special about her that she has you eating ice cream on a Friday?”

Grayson looks at the sweet dessert resting on the table with a disgusted look, only realizing now that he feels bloated and definitely indulged a bit too much.

“I don’t know, dude. She’s not like anyone I’ve ever talked to or dated which is why I’m fucking confused. I shouldn’t like her.”

Ethan laughs, shaking his head. “You’re a fucking idiot.”

“Why?”

“Because,” he picks up the ice cream and takes a spoonful into his mouth himself. “There’s a reason why you’re not with anyone you’ve talked to or dated in the past. And there’s a reason why someone so different from those girls is making you feel a lot more. Grow the fuck up and actually ask her out so you can stop being so damn mopey.”

Grayson looks at his brother, processing his words slowly as Ethan continues to finish off the ice cream. He knows Ethan is right. But you’re not into that, and definitely not into him like that.

“She would never date me,” Grayson huffs as he leans further back into the couch.

“You won’t know until you ask.”

Grayson can feel the nerves bubbling in his stomach at the idea of asking you to be anything more than friends. Were you even friends? Just someone you fucked occasionally but wouldn’t even let him kiss you slowly?

He’s pulled out of his thoughts by his phone vibrating, and he’s surprised to see your name attached to a new text.

sorry about last time. are you free tonight?

He reads the text over and over, trying to take it all in.

He’s never heard you apologize to him. Literally never. Not that you’ve done anything terrible, but you guys just didn’t do that unless there was underlying sarcasm beneath the words.

And the fact you wanted to see him again? Try again? Maybe Ethan was right. Or, you were horny as shit. But he’d take what he could get.

“Is it her?”

Grayson snaps his head up at Ethan, his cheeks a bit more flushes than before due to the fact he was now thinking about what you wanted to do tonight.

He nods, looking back down at his phone. “Yeah, she wants to hang out tonight.”

“Kacey’s coming over for the night and we already call the pool, so I don’t know what-”

“I’ll go to hers.”

“Okay.” Ethan stands with the empty ice cream pint in his hand. “Don’t forget to ask her out, though. Even if it’s a double date with me and K, to make it more comfortable for you guys.”

Grayson chuckles to himself because, realistically, you guys going on a double date together would probably be a lot of fun. If you and Grayson didn’t fight.

“I’d rather just be a fuck to her than nothing.”

Ethan sighs, shaking his head. “Whatever, dude. That isn’t good for you, but I know you’re not gonna listen to me.” And with that, he’s walking to the kitchen.

Grayson closes his eyes for a moment, taking a few deep breaths because Ethan was right again, but you’re just so...addicting. As much as he thinks you’d be amazing together if you were both willing to put your bruised egos aside, he can’t get the taste of your lips, your skin, your pussy out of his mind. Or the way you looked totally fucked out for him the first time you let him touch you. Or how breathless you were in the pool. He felt like he needed that, and if it meant some hurt feelings on his end, he’d take any fix he could get.

yeah, i’ll come by after Kacey gets here

***

Grayson was rather proud of the way he so easily slipped past Ethan and Kacey, grateful for his brother’s willingness to be vague so that he could get out without any questions. Because if there’s one person besides Ethan who will lecture Grayson, it would be Kacey. And she would definitely not approve of what was about to happen.

The drive felt longer this time. He had his hype playlist going, the one he listened to when he ran, trying to get some adrenaline pumping because confidence usually followed. And he really needed confidence right now.

You were going through the same routine as last time. Preparing your space for him, and more importantly preparing your mind. Trying not to psych yourself out while also trying to guess if he’d want it all gentle like last time, or if he’d be even more pissed because of what happened.

When you hear a knock at your front door you jump a bit, the moment of anticipation finally here. You wipe your sweaty palms on your shorts, walking to the door and taking a breath before swinging it open.

You both look at each other for a moment, and you can tell something has changed since the last time you saw him. He looked a bit paler, more tired, his hair not styled like normal. His posture was relaxed, his back slouched and hands in his pockets as he looked straight at you. Because sure, those were all little tells as to how the past week has treated him, but when you finally meet his gaze it feels like his eyes tell the whole story. You weren’t sure why or how, but you just knew he’d been through it the past week.

That made you feel a bit relieved, that you weren’t the only confused one. That is, if his rough week was in any relation to you. Or it could have been something with Ethan, or the company, or YouTube, or another girl. Maybe you weren’t the only one texting him about fucking around, and you weren’t the only one-

“Am I gonna get let in or did you invite me here to stand outside?”

You bite your lip, coming back to reality quickly and stepping aside so he can walk past you. You can smell his stupid signiture scent, the one you’d fake sneeze at just to tease him whenever he put on too much. The thought makes you smile, because it would always make him so annoyed. His face would scrunch, he’d toss his hands up like you’d just insulted his mother, and he’d throw at least a ten minute shit fit. It always worked without a doubt.

“Dude, are you good?” You’re pulled out of your trance to see him walking backwards towards your bedroom, an eyebrow raised as you still stand holding the door open. “Thought I was gonna get an apology or something, not just the fucking draft from the hallway.” The cockiness in his voice feels familiar, and almost makes you warm inside. But your inner competitiveness takes over first.

“Oh, you expected more than a ‘I’m sorry’? What makes you think you deserve that?” You chuckle, closing the door and locking it before walking to him.

He shrugs a cocky smirk on his face. “I usually accept apologies in acts of service. Never said I accepted yours yet.”

You put your hands on his stomach, pushing him through the doorway and closer to your bed. “Something tells me you will,” you whisper, your mouth right next to his ear as you lean in. You have a tight grip on his shirt where your hands were resting, his knees at the back of the bed.

He swallows thickly at your response, his own hands coming to grip your hips and bring you flush against him.

“Yeah? Gonna prove you’re really sorry, Y/N?”

You’re not sure if it’s the hushed tone or the fact he said your name that makes you freeze, your need to be in charge leaving you as you move your head to look up at him. He’d only ever said your name when he was pissed at you, when he was being sarcastic. Hearing it fall from his lips now, made a shiver run down your spine.

Grayson can clearly see how much he just affected you, and he plops down onto your bed victoriously as he watches you try to get your shit together. His arms are behind him so he can recline back to continue to watch you, his legs spread a bit and his dick clearly outlined in his sweats. You’re 90% sure he’s not wearing anything underneath, and the thought makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

He expects you to climb into his lap, so when you’re falling to your knees between his legs, his confidence wavers for a moment. “Oh shit,” he mumbles under his breath, and you’re sure he didn’t intend for you to hear it.

You lick your lips, sliding your hands slowly up his thighs as you watch him try and collect himself. He can’t decide if watching your hands or your face is better, his gaze constantly switching back and forth.

You, however, hold your eyes steady on his cock that is twitching underneath the confines of his sweats. You’re not sure how long you’re gonna be able to tease him, your mouth literally watering at the thought of finally tasting him, making him feel good that way. Letting him blow his load down your throat.

Your hands reach the hem of his sweats, and you bring one of your thumbs to rub over his cock. You hear him suck a breath in, your eyes finally lifting to meet his. He’s got his bottom lip between his teeth, his face barely lit up from the few candles in your room. His nostrils are flaring with every breath he lets out, the anticipation clear in the way his eyes are now jumping around your own face as he waits for your next move.

You dig your fingers into the hem of his sweats, pulling them down as he lifts his hips to make it easier for you, Once they’re around his ankles, you let your eyes fall to his hard cock against his lower stomach. You take in every vein you can see, trailing all the way up to his red tip. You could tell it was borderline painful with the way his thighs clenched under your hands. When you noticed the precum beginning to drip from his tip you can’t resist anymore, leaning in to lick it all up.

“Fuck, Y/N.”

There it is again. Your name so gracefully falling from his lips. You feel a wave of nervous energy flow through you, but not before the words go straight to your pussy. You’ve suddenly made it your mission to make him say your name as many times as possible tonight.

You grab him at his base, swirling your tongue around his tip and making sure to pay extra attention to his slit, noting his little twitch every time your tongue runs over the most sensitive part of him. He brings one of his hands to the side of your head, gripping the ponytail you’d already had in your hair in preparation.

You look up at him as you continue to explore what makes him pull tight against your scalp, his cocky smirk back again as he takes in his new view.

“Loving the taste of my cock?”

You let go of him for a moment, and you feel him tug on your hair a bit harder in protest, but before he can say anything else you’re leaning down farther to drag your tongue from his base all the way back up, swirling your tongue around once like earlier before sitting back on your heels. You lick your lips slowly, never breaking eye contact.

“It’s alright.”

He rolls his eyes, putting a bit of pressure on the back of your head to try and bring you closer to him again.

You chuckle, leaning forward so that when you speak again he feels your hot breath on the sensitive skin. “Why? Love the way my mouth feels?”

“I wouldn’t know because you haven’t actually fucking put it-”

Before he can even finish his sentence your mouth is surrounding him, slowly sink down until he’s hitting the back of your throat. You stay there a moment, listening to his quicker breathing and watching his stomach clench as you hollow your cheeks and leisurely drag your head up, letting your tongue trace the vein that runs on the underside of his cock.

You lift your mouth from him, a small trail of saliva still connecting your lower lip to his tip.

“How about now?”

He looks down at you for a second, total silence ringing through your room. If you weren’t so turned on and confused about your feelings, you’d be more sure about the blatant admiration and attraction you see in his gaze right now.

He moves his hand from your head to your face, his thumb wiping your bottom lip to clean it before grabbing your cheeks and forcing you to continue looking at him. “You’re not good for me.”

Before you can even question what he means, he’s forcing you to stand up. He brings your face to his, and your hands fly around for a moment as you try to keep your balance with his quick and forceful motions before they finally land on his shoulders, his lips hot and heavy on yours. He didn’t seem to mind the fact he could taste himself on your tongue, too eager to feel your mouth on his.

The way he is able to get you to move at just the feeling of his hands on your body is almost embarrassing, but when his hands come to your hips to move you so that you’re now sitting next to where he was as he awkwardly shuffles to get between your legs you’re not even surprised with how smooth he made it all seem. It almost felt like you guys worked well together.

He doesn’t even bother to step out of his sweats, only throwing his shirt over his head when he feels your hands tugging on it. His hand pushes at your shoulder so that you’re laying back, legs still hanging over the edge of the bed. He makes quick work of your shorts and underwear, letting you kick them off as he brings a large hand to pull your tank top down just enough so that your tits are out. You’re sure you heard some of the seams rip, but at this point you couldn’t care less.

He reaches below your knees, pulling your legs up forcefully so that they’re bent, your heels now resting on the edge of the bed and your pussy spread wide for him.

“Condom, Gray.” You nudge him with your knee to pull him out of the slight daze he’d been in since he last spoke, and his eyes clear up after he blinks and comes back to reality for a moment.

“Oh - right. Where…” He trails off, looking around the room to see if you had any out and available for him.

You lean up on your elbow, pointing to your nightstand. “Back right of the drawer.”

He leans over, not moving from his spot between your legs. You watch him rummage through the drawer and think about how natural it feels to have him there, going through your shit.

He’s quick to pull out a condom, not even closing the drawer before tearing it open with his teeth and rolling it on himself.

You open your mouth to say something, but before you can he pushes your thighs back enough for your feet to rise off the bed, his hands sliding up the backs of your legs to slowly extend them upwards. By the time his touch reaches your midcalf, you can feel the ridges of his stomach on the back of your thighs, your calves resting on his pecs. One of his hands goes back down your legs to tightly grip your thigh, the other going to his cock to line his dick up with your entrance.

His eyes leave your center for a moment, going back to your face. “Good?”

You nod, biting your lip in anticipation. Right as you feel his tip against you, about to push in you remember what you were going to say before. “Wait!” He looks up in alarm, raising his eyebrow at you in question, slight concern on his face.

“Is my apology accepted?”

His face relaxes as he chuckles lightly, leaning down a bit to hover over your body. You feel his dick back at your entrance, and you finally feel the way he slowly begins to fill you. Your body relaxes at the immediate satisfaction, your walls taking every inch of his cock as he works his way to fill you up completely.

Only when you can feel his hips against you does he speak up again. “I guess so.”

You let yourself fall flat on your back, a smile on your face as he smirks at you. He grabs your other thigh with the hand that helped him, digging his fingers into the flesh there as if to brace you.

He pulls back out of you slowly, brushing your g-spot while doing so. You let out a soft hum at the feeling, anticipation for what he’s about to do crawling through your body and causing even more wetness to come out of you and around his cock.

He opens his mouth to say something when he pauses his hips, staying totally still for a second. You wait for him to speak, but nothing ever comes. As you’re about to ask him about it, he cuts you off with the quick movements of his hips as he starts to pick up a fast pace in and out of you.

He’s got his lip between his teeth in concentration, the veins in his neck and arms sticking out with the force he’s using to hold you against him while he pounds into you. You let your mouth fall open while you close your eyes, the feeling already so good you can’t speak. You grip the sheets tightly in your hands, doing what you can to stay close to him despite the force of his hips continuously pushing you away. You can feel your tits moving with his motions, and you’re sure if you were to open your eyes, that’s where his gaze would be locked. Even before you’d fucked that’s where you’d catch him looking if he thought you weren’t paying attention.

“Such a nice pussy, shit,” he moans.

A whimper comes from the back of your throat and you open your eyes when you feel his lips against your leg. At first his touch is soft there, light kisses despite the hard and fast movements of his hips. But soon he’s nipping at your skin, almost like he’s using you as a way to quiet himself.

That’s not what you want, though. You want him moaning, whimpering, saying your name. So you do the one thing you know will get to him.

You clench your walls tightly around him, and it instantly changes the game for both of you. As you continuously clench and release, you can feel him press tighter against your walls. The pressure on your g-spot causes pleasure to shoot from your core to your whole body, and you moan loudly as his hips stutter.

“Y/N - fuck - keep doing that,” he practically begs, leaning further over you and bending you in ways you didn’t even think possible. You’re sure you’ll feel it tomorrow, but you don’t even care. Especially not when your name sounds that good when he’s moaning it.

So you listen to him, and soon you can feel the sweat gather along your hairline as your orgasm slowly creeps through your body. It feels good having him on top of you, gripping you, so deep inside of you.

He’s panting above you, and you can see how far gone he is, too. So you decide to act before you think, forcing your fingers under his that are gripping your thighs, making him hold your hands. His eyes meet yours to make sure you knew what you were doing, but he never fought you. If anything, he started grinding his hips into your more, making sure to reach any spot that went untouched.

He lets go of one of your hands, causing you to pout for a moment. But your lips are quickly turning into an o as you feel his thumb rub your clit.

“Shit, Gray,” you whine, digging your nails into his palms.

He grunts, and you’re pretty sure his lip will be bleeding once he finally releases it.

Before you can get too concerned with it, however, you feel your orgasm quickly coming from the pleasure coursing through your veins.

“I’m gonna cum,” you warn him, and it comes out much breathier than you intended.

“I got you, let go baby,” he huffs out.

Baby. Suddenly you had a new favorite to hearing your name from his lips.

And that’s what pushes you over the edge, your back arching as you finally fall over the edge, pleasure taking over your entire body as you moan out over and over again how good you feel to him. You’re not even sure what you’re saying and if it makes sense but you don’t care. You feel too good to care.

You can feel him finishing in the condom once you feel a bit more connected to reality, his grip on your hand almost painful as he pushes his hips into you one final time before resting there and halting all his movements.

You try to regulate your breathing as he comes down from his own high, his eyes closed. You take the time to admire him, watching his bulging arms and defined chest continue to tense with the pleasure he’s trying to recover from.

Once he opens his eyes, he moves to stand up completely again. He lets go of your hand, and you can’t ignore the slight pang of sadness that shoots through you when you feel the coldness of the air against your palm.

He throws the condom out in the trash next to your bed before looking down at you. You stay in silence for a minute, both of you unsure what to do now.

“I should probably go, right?” He asks, and you’re not sure if it’s your post orgasm glow or the sadness you feel at the idea of him leaving that makes you think he’s almost asking just to make sure he can stay. But you’re sure that’s not what he means.

“Yeah, probably,” you mumble as he leans over to pull his pants up. Once he’s done that and begins to put his shirt back on, you sit up to watch him move around the room.

Only when he grabs his phone and keys does he look at you again.

“Nice fucking you,” he says, nodding his chin as a way of saying goodbye before leaving your room.

Exactly what you thought, just a nice fuck.

***

You were sure if you got hit by an 18 wheeler you’d probably feel and look better than you did right now.

Seeing your family was never easy, and on top of the exhaustion of avoiding Grayson like the plague? You were done.

It had been six weeks since you’d last seen him, heard his voice, said anything mean about him. Because you haven’t even had the opportunity.

After the last time you fucked, neither of you reached out. You continued to avoid seeing him, and him you, because what were you gonna say? Suddenly I don’t hate you, I definitely like you, I wanted you to stay, and I wanted to spend time with you? Absolutely not. Not when you were so sure he’d laugh in your face and make your life miserable every time you were forced to be in a room together.

So you went a full 6 weeks without Grayson Dolan.

The first two weeks were okay, because you’d done that many times. Two weeks without him was easy, manageable. But at the beginning of week 3 when you heard Ethan telling Kacey how Grayson refused to come around when he knew you’d be there? That’s when you felt yourself break.

You didn’t even try and hide it from Kacey this time, letting her hold you when you cried. Which was a lot, because apparently pushing your feelings to the pits of hell for this long made shit a lot harder when they finally resurfaced. The last three weeks were spent in self pity parties, ice cream, movies and wine. And tears. Lots of tears.

It was safe to say you were not doing too hot, and your family never helped. So you left your parents’ house early, and were looking forward to spending the night with Kacey chilling out and not having to worry about anyone else in your life. The long trip back to your cozy apartment didn’t help, either. It gave you too much time to overthink the things that constantly seemed to take over your mind, so by the time you were opening your door there were tears filling your eyes and you could feel your lower lip begin to quiver.

“Surprise Kace! My dad’s still a fucking piece of shit, so I came home a day early,” you meakly call through the apartment, taking your shoes off as you’re met with silence besides the TV.

“K? Can we get McDonalds? It’ll help me-”

Your bag falls out of your hand as four pairs of eyes meet your hunched over, weak figure when you turn around on the hunt for your roommate. Kacey was cuddled to Ethan on the couch, and Ryan and Grayson sat on the floor by the coffee table that had half empty chinese food containers spread across it.

“Oh.”

“Hun what happened? Are you okay?” Kacey stands as she talks to you, her eyes softening and you do everything you can to keep your gaze locked on her. You can feel Grayson’s eyes burning into your face, and it’s only making you want to cry more.

“It’s fine, I’m fine,” you lie, your voice cracking as you do your best to put a small smile on your face. They can all clearly see through it, but you’re grateful none of them push it.

“You want some chinese?” Kacey offers once she finally meets you, putting her hands on your arms almost to steady you even though you weren’t swaying.

You look over her shoulder and to the food on the table and for a second your eyes meet Grayson’s. They looked sad, sad for you. And that’s the last thing you wanted.

You look back at Kacey, shaking your head. “I’m good. Gonna shower anyways.”

You move away from her, grabbing your bag and walking down the hallway. You don’t even bother dropping anything in your room first, heading to the bathroom and shutting the door. It’s moments like this where you wish you and Kacey had gone a little nicer on your apartment, because your broken bathroom lock is staring at you right in the face as you pray everyone respects your privacy.

You turn on the shower to let it heat up, but the minute you see yourself in the mirror, the tears begin to fall. You just hoped the sound of the water drowned out your quiet sobs as you gripped the counter to try and keep yourself steady.

“Is she gonna be okay?” Ethan asks as Kacey comes to sit back down with a frown on her lips.

She nods, sighing. “Yeah, she just hates talking about that stuff with anyone. Hell, I barely know anything, just that she had it kind of rough growing up and she’s still pretty fucked up for it. She usually needs a few days to recuperate from a good visit to her family, so I’m surprised she was able to get through the living room without crying.”

The three guys take in the new information in silence, Ethan wrapping his arm around Kacey to keep her close to him.

Grayson stands, wiping his hands on his shorts. Ethan raises a brow at him in question, while Kacey and Ryan simply watch his movements.

“I have to pee.”

“We only have one bathroom, Gray,” Kacey reminds him.

“I know.”

He turns and walks to the hallway you disappeared down just a few minutes before.

“Grayson,” Kacey calls to him, making him turn to look at her.

She gives him a do you have any idea what you’re doing? look.

His lips tighten as he gives her a curt nod before turning back and walking up to the bathroom door. He knocks gently, putting his ear close to the wood to try and hear you behind it.

The sound makes you jump as you sniffle and quickly wipe your nose. “Kacey, listen. I know you’re worried, but I really just need a shower first.”

Your voice is thick, and it’s obvious to Grayson that you’d been crying. It breaks his heart a bit, as confusing as it is for him. Is that what you sounded like if he had made you cry?

“It’s me.”

The second you hear his voice your whole body tenses as you lift your head to look at yourself in the mirror again. Your eyes are red and puffy, your nose irritated and your lips swollen. You somehow looked ten times worse than when you first walked in the door, and you had little interest in letting Grayson in.

“Y/N.”

You sigh, closing your eyes and letting your head fall back down. “What?”

“I gotta pee.”

You scoff, and the familiar anger you hadn’t felt for almost 6 weeks weeks boils right back up in you. You hate to admit it, but it felt good to feel something normal, something other than sadness even if it’s just for a moment.

You swing the door open standing almost chest to chest with the man who has haunted you for way too long now.

“I’m going to take a fucking shower first. Then you can pee.” You sound way less angry than normal, much less of a bite to your words.

His face is soft as he takes in your appearance, his body blocking you into the bathroom without an escape.

“It’s an emergency.”

It’s clearly not, and by the tone of his voice you’re not even sure he has to pee at all. He’s casual, calm even, besides the worry on his face.

You groan and sniffle, rolling your eyes before turning and walking farther into the room. “Can you at least let me get in first?”

He steps into the tiny room with you, closing the door behind him. “Sure.”

“Without you in here.”

He rolls his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’ve already seen it all. Get in the shower so I can pee.”

“Turn around,” you whine, and he can tell your patience is running thin. You’re grateful he doesn’t push you farther, his body turning so his back is to you. You’re quick to strip yourself of your clothes, opening the curtain and stepping in.

“I can’t believe you couldn’t wait ten minutes to fucking pee,” you complain, grabbing your shampoo.

You hear Grayson move around outside the shower.

“If you’re gonna complain about me at least do it to my face so I’m not talking to a damn curtain like an idiot.”

You pull the curtain back so that your head can pop out to see he is sat on the now closed toilet seat.

“Fucking dick, didn’t even need to take a piss. Why do you have this incessant need to bother me all the time?” You throw the curtain back into place, beginning to wash your hair as you do your best to control your breathing. You can feel the tears that still threaten to spill start to well up in your eyes, but you’ll be damned if you’re caught crying by Grayson Dolan.

“You make it fun,” he chuckles out.

You bite your lip, pausing your movements to prevent any tears from falling. You’re unsuccessful, feeling a few fall down your cheeks before you can stop them, but the water washes them away quickly. You take some deep breaths, washing the shampoo from your hair to try and calm down a bit. You didn’t like how your anger at Grayson was making you sad now, too.

“Y/N?” He taps on the curtain, causing you to jump and gasp. Your hand comes to your chest to cover your heart that was already beating fast.

“What?” You snap.

“I went 6 weeks without talking to you, I’m not leaving until you fucking say something back.”

You huff, and honestly consider sitting on the floor because of your lack of energy. “What do you want me to fucking say, Grayson?”

“I don’t know,” he sighs, and you can hear him get up and pace. “That you hate me, that you think I’m annoying and rude and narcissistic and that I’m dense or whatever the fuck you feel like I am today! Just fucking call me something, say something.”

“Well, I don’t have the energy to fight your dumbass right now, so either pee or leave.”

Grayson smiles to himself at the name you still managed to throw in there, but it quickly falls when he hears a tiny sniffle from you.

You don’t hear anything from him for a minute, and you begin to assume that he had managed to sneak out without you knowing.

So you condition your hair, letting the tears roll down your face again as your ears begin to ring from how overwhelming everything has been the past day, weekend, months. You can barely keep your surroundings clear in your mind with everything racing through it.

Which is why when the curtain is suddenly being thrown back and a naked Grayson is stepping in the shower with you, you almost scream bloody murder before he covers your mouth and grabs your hip to keep you from stumbling backwards.

You relax at his touch, realizing you’re not going to get murdered (watching Criminal Minds was probably not the best idea when you’re so high stress at the moment). He removes his hand and you frown immediately.

“Why the hell are you in my shower with me?”

“Because you won’t talk!” At this point you can see how distressed he is, the wrinkles around his eyes more pronounced than normal and his bags darker than normal. It’s really the first time you’ve had to consider how much you guys not talking could have weighed on him. You assumed he would find a new girl and move on, while you made Kacey practically babysit you. It never crossed your mind that he would have felt even similarly to you.

“I have nothing to say to you.”

You can see how your words cut deep instantly, and you regret saying them. Especially because it’s not true, you’re finding yourself wanting nothing more than for him to stay right now and talk to you. To comfort you.

“So then tell me what happened six weeks ago that changed shit. Or tell me what happened with your dad. Or just fucking tell me something,” he pleads weakly.

You wrap your arms around his torso, pulling him flush against your wet body. You rest your head on his chest and close your eyes while one of his large hands caresses your back, the other coming up to stroke your hair.

You guys stand like that for a while, your sense of time totally thrown off. It could have been two minutes or two hours, you didn't know. But he stayed there holding you, keeping you close to him.

“I really wanna tell you about my dad, but I can’t right now,” you mumble out.

His muscles tense for a moment at the sound of your scratchy voice before he continues to rub your back.

“You don’t have to. Are you physically okay?” You nod, your cheek rubbing against his now wet chest. “Yeah. It’s just really hard to say out loud, and I need to process it before I tell someone.”

“That’s okay.” He leans down to leave a few gentle kisses along your hairline.

“But know that when I do tell you it’ll make more sense why I hated you. And why it’s hard for me to trust you. And why I avoided you for so long. It’s not an excuse, but know I don’t like being this way.”

He tightens his arms around you, resting his cheek on top of your head. “I don’t think I was very helpful to the cause, either.”

You chuckle, cuddling further into him. “I should probably finish showering.”

He lets go of you with that, holding you by your shoulders instead. “Want help?”

You laugh, shaking your head. “No, I know how to wash my own body. Plus, you don’t get to touch my tits yet.”

He pouts, letting his gaze fall to them. “Why not?”

“Because I’m still mad at you for lying about having to pee.” You put your hands on his chest, nudging him backwards a bit.

“Hey - hey, wait a second.” He grabs your wrists to stop your movements, pulling you back to him easily.

You both have stupid grins on your face, unable to contain the new feelings rushing through the both of you. Well, not new. But you were allowing yourself to finally feel them without covering them with anger.

He leans in closer to you, finally letting his lips touch yours for what feels like the first time. Yes, you’ve kissed before, and it was electric every time. But this? This was a whole new level.

His lips were soft and meaningful against yours, his movements well thought out as he did his best to portray everything he couldn’t verbally with the way his lips fit so perfectly with yours. You felt butterflies in your stomach from how slow and sensual he was being, and you felt like you could melt right into him because of it.

Once he was satisfied, he grabbed the back of your head to keep you steady while he pecked a few quick kisses against your lips, making you smile against him. He only pulled away when you were both giggling.

“I guess I’ll leave you to finish your shower, then.”

You bit your lip, nodding your head. “Yeah. But can you do two things for me?”

He smiles and nods eagerly.

You giggle, putting a hand on his hip to start guiding him out of the shower. “Can you kick everyone out? And then sit on the toilet to keep me company?”

He smirks, stepping out of the tub. “What if I actually have to pee now?”

“So then fucking pee but don’t flush. I’m more concerned with getting everyone out.”

“Not gonna be able to contain how loud you’ll be when you finally let me touch you?”

“Oh my god,” you roll your eyes. “You make it so hard to not wanna make fun of everything you say.”

“Hey, I’d rather you make fun of me every day than not talk to me at all,” he admits, his tone still joking but you can tell he’s serious.

You feel your cheeks blush as your chest swells, so you close the curtain to continue showering. “Get everyone out, you cocky, horny, dickhead.”

He laughs, grabbing a towel from the rack hanging next to him. “There she is,” he mumbles to himself, but you hear and feel your blush deepen further.

He walks to the door and opens it, walking the few feet it takes to reach where everyone was still anxiously waiting.

“Everything’s under control here. You guys gotta head out, though.”

Kacey looks at him in shock, taking in his almost naked, completely wet body as she pieces everything together with a look of confusion on her face.

“Do you have a fucking UTI or some shit?” Ethan laughs while his eyes are still on his phone before he also looks up at him, his phone falling out of his hands and into his lap. “Dude what the fuck?”

“I think we should go,” Ryan chimes in, standing up and clearing the containers from the coffee table.

“Grayson, what’s happening?” Kacey stands, concern still written all over her face. She walks up to him quickly, pointing a finger at him. “Did you take advantage of her? Grayson, she’s hurt! What the-”

Grayson easily grabs the hand that her pointed finger is attached to as he rolls his eyes. “No, Kacey. I talked to her. Comforted her, made her feel better.” Kacey raises her eyebrows at the last comment which makes Grayson groan. “Not like that. Made her heart feel better. I’ll tell her to text you when she’s feeling up to it for you to come home for her to explain, but please leave. She asked me to get you guys out.”

Her face softens at that as she looks over his shoulder at the open bathroom door.

“Y/N!” She calls loud enough for you to hear over the running water.

“Yeah?” Your voice is muffled but she can hear you’re less emotional than when you walked in the door. This makes her relax a bit.

“You want us out?”

“Yes please!”

That seems to satisfy her, as she backs away from Grayson slowly. “I can’t believe it,” she mumbles under her breath, shaking her head as she grabs her phone.

“Bro what is going on?” Ethan stands, looking at his brother for answers.

“Please,” Grayson practically begs. “Please leave and we can talk about it all later.”

“Yeah something tells me we don’t want to be around for when Y/N gets out of the shower,” Ryan adds as he gets his own stuff ready to go.

“Why are you so chill right now?” Ethan asks him.

Ryan shrugs, looking to Grayson for a moment.

“You got this?” Grayson asks.

Ryan nods, and Grayson turns quickly to make it back to the bathroom, back to you.

When the door shuts both Kacey and Ethan look directly at Ryan.

“Did you know about this? What the fuck is happening?” Ethan asks him as Ryan ushers them both to the front door.

“It’s not my place to tell you guys. But we definitely want to leave them alone.”

The two both continue to pester Ryan while they leave, and Grayson lets out a sigh of relief once he hears quiet outside from his place on the toilet.

“They’re gone,” he mumbles, rubbing his hands on the towel still wrapped around his waist.

“Hmm, suddenly I think I need a two hour shower.”

He groans, leaning back and hissing at the cold porcelain against his skin. “I’ll get back in with you.”

“You’re not invited,” you laugh, and Grayson laughs with you.

You’re quick to finish washing your body, itching to be out there with Grayson again. He sits there in a daze, replaying the sound of your laugh in his head on repeat and wondering how he went so long without it. And how much he regrets not being the source of it more often.

When you shut the water off, Grayson sits up giddily as he waits for you to finally get out. Somehow your time away from him now feels longer than the six weeks prior.

Your reach for your towel, lazily drying off because something told you there wouldn’t be many clothes in your near future. When you step out, towel held up to your front, Grayson is watching you with nothing but admiration on his face.

“What?”

He shakes his head, his smile so wide his cheeks hurt but he didn’t care. “Nothing. Just missed you.”

You giggle, going to straddle his thighs and sit on his lap, your towel barely covering you still. He grabs the back of your bare upper thighs to keep you steady as your free hand rests on his shoulder.

“You were literally sitting out here for, like, two minutes alone while I finished showering.”

He shakes his head chuckling, his gaze falling from your face to where you held the towel against your body as a rare feeling took over: shyness. It’s hard to make Grayson Dolan shy, to make him blush, but you’ve managed to do it.

“I meant the month and a half we didn’t see each other, but then too.” He shrugs as his thoughts run a mile a minute. “Fuck.” He laughs louder as he finally lets his eyes meet yours again.

“What now?”

“I’m feeling all...soft and shit. I don’t know. I’m not used to it.”

“Wow, I’m amazing. The girl to make the asshole who is Grayson Dolan soft for five minutes.”

“Yeah, let’s go with just five minutes,” he grunts as he stands, keeping his strong hold around you to keep you in his arms.

You laugh, pulling your chest against his as you wrap your arms around his neck to keep yourself steady in his grip.

“Oh, and for the record,” you say while playing with the short hairs at the back of his neck as he does his best to maneuver to your room while looking at you. “I missed you too.”

Tags: @spideysimpossiblegirl

read the next part here!

#Grayson dolan #Grayson Dolan blurb #Grayson Dolan concept #Grayson Dolan smut #Grayson Dolan fic #Grayson Dolan fanfic #Grayson Dolan imagine #dolan twins #dolan twins concept #dolan twins blurb #dolan twins fic #dolan twins smut #dolan twins fanfic #dolan twins imagine #hyt

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nancydfan · 3 years

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LONG POST BUT: Everything about Karl’s character kills me. Karl became the literal thing he loathed- a monster. He is more than likely repulsed by his own very being. He hated that he was forced to be infected and hated that Miranda even called him “son” because it seemed like he at least understood that family doesn’t= experimentation and that family isn’t replaceable and once he realized they were all just rejects and not her “family” it hurt him because he wasn’t brainwashed. But sadly he was willing to use Rose by however means and he makes a comment during his battle “so, this is the power of fatherly love.” I wish in a way that Karl was an actual father himself because I feel like his whole story arc would of played out differently and it probably would of hurt even more, I know they made Lady D a mother of sorts to contrast Ethan’s struggle of protecting his own family but in a way I wish Karl knew “fatherly love” because he obviously yearned for a sense of normality from the beginning and it was taken from him so, he built a whole army just to kill Miranda since she took his humanity/dignity away from him. But in turn he lost his humanity along the way- I am angry at capcom for not humanizing him more, but instead he just spirals and turns into a big ball of flesh in typical RE fashion. He also says, “I do have to thank Miranda for giving me this power, and like a good son I’ll kill her.” I think he wanted a family or to at least have a family that loved him, a mother that was his actual mother to him and didn’t experiment on him. He talks about having his dignity taken away by Miranda and “what she did to my body...” which could very well mean his literal organs are electricity now and he can’t have kids/ can’t have a normal body and nothing is of his own choice anymore. He is cocky and takes pride in who he is outside of being infected, he’s a genius engineer who owns a factory that seems to have been in the Heisenberg family for decades- the official wiki says he inherited it from his family- Karl can’t inherit it down to anyone because he can’t have his own children and maybe he didn’t want to have kids but it seems like it was implied that he was suppose to pass it down to his future kids (that now he can’t have because he has zappy organs instead). Karl has modernized it and kept it up to date with common times which seems like he prides it in a way. It also is being used for its actual purpose, while also being used to make his army. He also contrasts Lady D, they’re literally total opposites but when she says “he wouldn’t know responsibility if it was welded to that hammer.” I think is also a dig at him for not having any “responsibility” such as a family of his own she views him as a “child” himself. Lady D prides herself and has dignity about her and her daughters and talks about how much sweat and tears it took raising them when Ethan was mowing through the castle. Karl cuts Lady D off when she mentions her own “daughters” during the meeting and says the line about “yack yack a mans dick gets cut off in the castle..” I think there’s some sting of jealously there because he has no family/he has nothing to really call his own except the factory. He also can’t even comprehend why Ethan turned him down because he doesn’t know “fatherly love” but he never got a chance to be a father because it was another thing Miranda took the chance of it ever happening from him. So he reacts with anger and literally spirals and then it comes full circle when he makes comments about it to Ethan, how desperate Ethan is to get his daughter back with his power of “fatherly love.” He also never calls Miranda “Mother Miranda”, he does refer to his siblings as siblings multiple times which is interesting. I think the idea of a mother to him is everything Miranda isn’t. They’re all awful humans who suffered from Miranda, and I absolutely loved the family dilemma’s they all shared etc.

Hey nonnie! Thanks for sending this in. I apologize if I miss parts of this!

My friend said everyone in re8 basically has mommy issues and it’s almost too true. I got the impression Karl was not only very angry but very bitter. And a part of this is very fair. Whoever he was before was taken away by Miranda. Who in turn did nothing for him. He didn’t ask for this. He didn’t want it.

I think Capcom over extends themselves when they had too many characters because then they don’t flesh them out enough. I’m not sure if he just wanted revenge at this point and then obviously freedom.

But yeah, I don’t think he realizes he lost his humanity like he did. Maybe it’s been so long he’s forgotten. But also probably why he doesn’t understand Ethan sometimes because it’s foreign to me.

I love Heisenberg and would have liked to know him better. Ngl I don’t remember all of the dialogue cause I was usually panic running 😆

#thanks for the ask nonnie 💜💜💜#resident evil #resident evil spoilers #resident evil 8 #mrs joe speaks #karl heisenberg #Heisenberg

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piracytheorist · 3 years

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Since the first thing that strikes me about re8, story-wise, is that it seems to be all over the place? Again, I’ve no idea how it ties to previous games but it feels like this parental/mother-child theme is just hanging there with no resolution at all? I mean yes, Ethan saved his daughter, presumably breaking some sort of abuse cycle, yay, congrats, but what about his wife/gf? Isn’t she supposed to be like the main protagonist of the story of a mother bereaved to the point of tyrannical madness

Or rather, this specific story is not the right choice for his character since there’s SO many ethical and philosophical issues and questions implied but never properly explored because of Ethan’s ‘fuck you, idc’ attitude (which is completely understandable in those circumstances but adds virtually nothing to the plot and arguably even ruins it a bit). Heisenberg could’ve been an excellent ally with fascinating grey morality (provided the writers wouldn’t push him to the point of absolute insanity and let freedom, not power-hunger be his main goal and motivation for rebellion).And again, aren’t the lords supposed to represent child development stages? In which case Ethan what? Kills the possibility of some evil version of Rose? Or his own chance to experience fatherhood throughout all of those stages? Either way, it seems a bit… weird to have a Parent destroy multiple people whose main relevance to the plot is that they’re children of an abusive antagonist in a storyline so extremely focused on parent/kid relationships.

I feel like the main theme of re8 is not just parenthood/motherhood, but the relationship itself of the parent to the child. There's a lot of mentions to "children being used". Miranda kidnapping people, experimenting on them and mutating them and then treating them like they're her kids; Miranda kidnapping and practically killing Rose; Dimitrescu making daughters out of reanimated corpses she experimented on; Heisenberg wanting to use Rose's powers, etc etc.

And it's important that Miranda is at the center of this. There's something very interesting she says to Ethan in her boss fight:

"Why do you interfere? Surely you have no need of Rose now, so close to death?"

And that's where her mistake was. Ethan wasn't doing all that because he needed Rose herself. He was doing it to save her, fully aware that he wasn't going to be a part of her life cause he knew he was dying. Miranda was way too dependent on her love for Eva - and like, I honestly get it that losing your child can devastate you (if anything my fear of that is one of the reasons I don't want to have kids) - so much that her life literally revolved around her child. Once Eva died, Miranda wanted to die. Once she found the Megamycete and discovered she maybe had a chance to bring Eva back, she dedicated her entire life and ruined multiple others to do just that. Her one and biggest need was to get Eva back. It wasn't a simple want or wish. It was a need. She'd get her child back, damn everyone else - including other people's children.

Miranda had no-one to blame directly; Eva had died from the influenza, it wasn't like she had any chance to change things. Ethan's case was different; he had people to blame, particularly, the one who kidnapped Rose and dismembered her, and her lackeys who kept said parts and fought him for trying to take them back.

So on one end, you have a parent who lost her child due to a tragedy, and ended up destroying other - innocent - lives in order to get her back. On the other, you have a parent who lost his child due to a crime, and ended up going after the criminals responsible in order to get the child back. Like, it wasn't even revenge, and it wasn't that he "needed" Rose in his life. He simply wanted to save her and ensure she'll be alright.

I fully agree it could have been Mia as the protagonist in re8, and that it was a wasted opportunity to simply fridge her and have her in the sidelines angsting over her husband. But whether it was Mia or Ethan as the protagonist, I feel like the theme that I explained above does offer a resolution, showing the opposites of Miranda and Ethan, and ending Miranda's tyrrany of her "need" to have her child back through Ethan's determination to ensure his child's safety and happiness - even if he doesn't get to be a part of any of that later on. Miranda showed obsession; Ethan showed dedication.

And this is how I see the abuse cycle breaking and the resolution is reached; an obsessed parent hurt a good parent's child to bring their own child back - the good parent's dedication stopped the former, allowing the former's tyrrany to end and their child to grow up safe.

Seeing as this is a horror game, I don't tend to focus on the morality issues (if I'm interpreting your second message correctly). Like, the developers are making a grant effort to put us in Ethan's shoes, first-person POV, plain character protagonist and all; our child got kidnapped and practically murdered, and we have the chance to bring her back. We'll absolutely raise hell to the people who are responsible for it and we will get our child back, fuck any moral dilemmas we might have. When someone is threatening your life, you have the ability to kill them to defend yourself. In the case of a caring parent, that ability may multiply by a lot when the threat is towards their child. And I feel that this is what the game explored in the end. Though the whole survival issue is taxing on Ethan, he doesn't give a damn about who he has to kill if it means saving his daughter - but again, it's only the responsible parties. We see how watching all the people at Luisa's house die affected him, and even before Elena died, he wanted to ensure her safety before he went searching for Rose; he is sympathetic and morally rational, but also capable of cold-blooded murder if someone is threatening his child. To a lesser extent, we saw that in re7 too. With his life on the line, he killed Jack (multiple times) and Marguerite, and at the end he recognized how they were actually victims of Eveline. But they were still actively trying to murder him so he wasn't given the chance to help them. With Zoe, he promised to send help, and he did, even wanting to talk to her once she'd been rescued by her uncle and Chris. The same applies to re8, but as I said, it's multiplied since it's his daughter who's in danger, and the end of re8 proves he cares for her safety more than his own.

Now, all that said, I think it's important to note how it's stil a Resident Evil game. I haven't actually played or watched any playthroughs of other games, but the basic concept in these games, from what I understand, is that the player shoots zombies; ex-human beings who have lost any human mentality and will just come for your throat if you don't kill them first. They're not humans anymore, they can't be reasoned or sympathized with. It's not really an issue of morality, ethics or philosophy. Your life, and the life of your child in the case of re8, are in danger. You don't give a shit. You just start shooting and hope for the best. Again, I don't know if the morality issue is explored in other RE games, but to be honest... Resident Evil doesn't sound like the kind of franchise that's thematically into going super deep into the morality of shooting zombies to save your life.

I have to admit I haven't thought of the Lords being representative of child development stages. I think they could be put as Moreau being a toddler, fully dependent on their parent - funnily enough, the Greek word for baby is "moro", pronounced almost exactly the way "Moreau" is pronounced in the game - Donna as a child, Heisenberg as a (rebellious?) teenager, and Dimitrescu as a late teen/young adult (if anything, Dimitrescu seems to behave like the eldest child of the bunch). But I'm not sure the connection that has to Ethan as a father, if anything because the bosses are fought in complete random order of age, if my analysis is correct. Like, I understand the symbolism behind the Lords' behaviours, maybe as you said they represent the obstacles Ethan had to overcome. In one single day and with his life on the line, instead of in the course of Rose's entire childhood and adolescence, but that's exactly why he hated being a protagonist of a horror game, lol.

Anyway, yeah. All in all, I don't think Resident Evil is a franchise where we should expect to sit down afterwards and ponder whether we were right to shoot the zombies that were trying to kill us. Again, I'm not the right person to ask this, since I don't know anything about other RE games, but that's the conclusion I'm making in a meta-thinking way.

#Resident Evil #Resident Evil Village #Resident Evil 8 #Ethan Winters #Mother Miranda #re meta #anonymous #ask and ye shall receive

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heauxplesslydevoted · 4 years

Text

Take Care (Ethan x MC)

Summary: Set sometime between chapter 18, Ethan forces Naomi to take a break.

A/N: Okay the other day when I posted that i was writing tooth rotting fluff, this isn’t what I had in mind. That story will come later this week.

~v~

“How long have you been here?”

The question startles Naomi awake, Ethan’s stern voice cutting through the hazy cloud of sleepiness invading all of her senses.

If she didn’t have his handsome features committed to memory already, she might not have been able to make him out, her vision getting blurrier and blurrier as time ticks on.

“What?”

“How long have you been here?” Ethan asks again. “When was the last time you stepped out of Edenbrook?”

It’s a valid question, one Naomi hasn’t given any thought to. “What day is it?”

“Thursday.”

“I’ve been here since Saturday night,” Naomi confesses. Saying it out loud is slightly sobering. The past few weeks have flown by in a blur so unlike anything she’s ever experienced before. But with the hospital closing down soon, there’s no time to waste these days. The people of Boston will be down a hospital, and they still need help.

Ethan pinches the bridge of his nose. “Christ, Naomi.” Yes the hospital is shutting down, but he’s sure there are countless laws she’s violated in the meantime, as no one is supposed to be at the hospital for triple digit hours at a time.

“What? You’re the one who said we should spend our time helping as many people as we can.”

Leave it to her to throw his words back in his face. She’s gotten increasingly better at it, and he’s not a fan.

“Okay, but I didn’t say you had to move in to do so. And you’re always saying I don’t have a work-life balance.”

Naomi’s arms extend and she gestures widely to the bench she’s sitting on in front of the cafeteria. “What does it look like I’m doing?”

“On the verge of collapsing,” Ethan quips.

“I’m sitting,” Naomi argues. “I’m taking a break.”

“Are you currently with a patient?”

“No.”

“Good.” Ethan extends his hand for Naomi to take. After a beat of hesitation, she accepts. He lifts her out of her seat with a swift tug. “You’re coming home with me.”

“But–”

“It wasn’t a question,” Ethan deadpans. “It was an order.”

Naomi plants her feet on the ground, willing herself to not move. It’s a futile attempt because she’s too exhausted and weak to actually have the amount of strength it’d take to battle Ethan on this, but he respects her stubbornness and doesn’t carry her out. “Ethan, I’ll take a nap in an on-call room for an hour, I don’t need to leave.”

“Rookie, you’re clocking out for the evening,” Ethan says, his tone letting it be known that it isn’t up for debate.

“I’m back to ‘rookie’ now?”

“Yes, because you’re being petulant, and you’re not listening to me.”

“You’re not my direct superior anymore, Mister ‘We-Don’t-Need-a-Diagnostics-Team’.”

“I’m still your attending, you still have to listen to me. And I say you’re done for the day.” Not giving her the chance to respond, Ethan wraps an arm around her waist and pulls her close. She’s dead weight in his arms and he has to all but drag her to the locker room to retrieve her personal belongings.

Urge car ride to his apartment is silent, save for very idle chit chat. Naomi is too tired to speak, and she won’t admit it due to pure pride and stubbornness, but sitting in Ethan passenger seat on the way to his place is the most peace and quiet she’s had in a long time, not to mention the longest she’s sat still in days. Forever the know-it-all, Ethan picks up on her need for silence and solitude, and doesn’t say too much outside of asking her what she wants for dinner. They decide on a pizza, compromising on garlic chicken.

As soon as they step foot into the apartment, Naomi is assaulted by an overzealous golden retriever. He barks excitedly at her, clawing and licking at her scrub pants as a greeting. Jenner has grown used to her presence, the rare occasions she does actually leave Edenbrook are spent here, curled up with the large dog on the days he’s not in Providence with Alan.

“How’s my favorite boy?” Naomi asks, scratching behind Jenner’s ear. Jenner barks in reply, his tongue falling out of his mouth and lolling to the side as she makes himself comfortable under her touch.

After a few more scritches and whispered affirmations, Naomi forces herself away from the day, though she could easily spend all night with him in the entryway. She kicks off her shoes at the door and drops her purse there as well.

“Do you want to eat first?” Ethan asks.

The pizza did tempt her the entire drive here, but she desperately wants to take a shower. Maybe she’s losing it at this point, but she can still feel Edenbrook on her skin, and smell the sterilizing disinfectant the cleaning crew uses.

“I need a shower,” Naomi replies definitively, though she makes no effort to move. “Besides, scarfing down cold pizza is always a good idea.”

“Alright.”

Ethan takes her hand and leads her through his apartment, making sure she doesn’t bump into anything on their way to his en-suite

He turns on the water for her, the large waterfall shower steaming the glass planes almost instantly.

“Want some company?” Ethan asks.

“That sounds nice.”

Because she’s literally a zombie, Ethan helps Naomi out of her clothing, delicately peeling the baby blue scrubs off of her body and leaving a pile of discarded clothing on the floor. He follows, removing his own clothing with less care than he did hers, before walking them both into the shower.

For a long time neither of them do anything, Naomi too caught up in the heat of the water and Ethan’s amazing water pressure, and Ethan too enthralled in watching her.

Her skill is slightly pale, evidence that she probably hasn’t had proper sleep or food in Lord only knows how long, and he hasn’t seen dark circles under her eyes like this in months, since the night of the...incident as he’s decided to call it. She’s exhausted, it’s clear in the labored breaths that she takes, and Ethan is still sure without a shadow of a doubt that she’s the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen.

Unable to stop himself, his hand gently cups the back of her neck, tilting her head back so he can kiss her again. It’s soft and unhurried as if they have all the time in the world to do this.

The kiss turns more urgent as some of the fog clears from Naomi’s brain. Standing on the tips of her toes, she wraps her arms around of Ethan’s neck holding him close, allowing him to deepen the kiss.

Ethan is rewarded with a tiny moan from his girlfriend, a moan that he swallows with the kiss before it dissolves into a low grumble in the back of her throat.

“I missed that,” Naomi admits as Ethan breaks the kiss.

“What? Kissing me?”

She hums in confirmation and leans forward, pressing a chaste kiss onto his chest. “I can’t even remember the last time I kissed you. The only recent memories I have involve me at Edenbrook, diagnosing patients.”

She’s right. Their only focus has been work, work, work, and Ethan can’t remember the last kiss either.

His thoughts are broken up by Naomi, her hands roaming aimlessly along his arms and shoulders. Her exploration goes further south until her nails are raking along his stomach. “When was the last time I touched you?” She asks quietly, her eyes boring into his. “When was the last time I saw you naked?”

A measured exhale escapes Ethan’s nostrils as her hands venture dangerously lower, slightly grazing his pelvis. If neither of them can recall their last kiss, trying to remember the last time they had sex would be a moot point. The nights they leave Edenbrook are spent collapsing in his bed as soon as they can, drifting into unconsciousness almost immediately. “I don’t know.”

“God, have we become old and boring already?”

“We’re just tired and overworked,” Ethan says. “It’ll pass soon.”

The words unspoken hang in the air, just as thick and heavy as the steam surrounding them. Soon they’ll have plenty of time to get back into the normal aspects of their relationship only because they’ll both be unemployed. Edenbrook will be gone before they know it.

Not wanting to dwell on that, Ethan shakes his head as if he will away the cynical thoughts. Instead, he grabs Naomi’s hands, holding them tight to his chest. “We don’t have to do anything tonight.”

“Really? Something begs to differ.” With a raised eyebrow, Naomi looks down curiously at the evidence of Ethan’s arousal, comfortable nestled between the two of them. Before she can reach down and touch him, Ethan shakes his head.

“I have the most beautiful woman, naked and wet in front of me. This was inevitable, but it’ll go away.”

“I can make it go away.”

“Mhmm-hmmm. Turn around, Valentine.”

“Yes, sir.”

Ethan rolls his eyes. How this woman always finds the space and opportunity to flirt with him is a mystery. Lining the walls of his shower are all of Naomi’s bath and shower products. He’s always making fun of her for being a product hoarder, though she insists everything is different—he’s been schooled on the differences between regular, leave-in, and deep conditioner, creams vs gels, body scrubs and shower gels many times and he still doesn’t see a need for it all.

Grabbing her favorite shampoo, Ethan pours a generous amount into the palm of her hand before gently running it through her strands of hair. He’s seen her wash her hair enough times to know the bare bones of her routine. Very careful of her curls, he makes sure to not roughly drag his fingers through her hair and risk creating a tangled disaster for her to handle later on.

Her head tips back. “Can I pay you to wash my hair from now on? I never want to go back to doing it myself.”

A swell of pride forms in his chest at the compliment. “No payment needed.”

Once he’s finished washing her hair and he’s coated it in conditioner —she insists on leave-in, as she doesn’t have the energy to put my more effort into her hair for the evening—Ethan lathers her in one of her shower gels, whichever one makes her smell like jasmine.

He moves slower as he does this, pressing his thumb into the base of her neck, massaging away some of the stress she’s carrying. His hands dig into her shoulders, between her shoulder blades, and her lower back, loosening the muscles as he goes.

Naomi doesn’t attempt to stop the moans fighting to spill from her mouth, no matter how obscene they sound. The relief that bloods her body is instant, his touch working out knots she wasn’t even aware of.

“You’re a great doctor, you cook, and you're an excellent masseuse?” Naomi sighs in content. “What can’t you do?”

“I told you I make it my mission to be good at everything.”

“I’m going to find your weakness one day, Ramsey.”

She’s his weakness, his Achilles heel, and Ethan can’t believe she doesn’t know it already. There’s no end of the earth he wouldn’t go to for her, no hoop he wouldn’t jump through, his feelings for her his fateful flaw and his greatest strength all in one.

He kisses her again, this time on the side of her neck. His breath fans her, heating the sensitive skin as he leans closer. “Good luck.”

He continues the massage in silence, careful to keep his touch away from places that would no doubt cause this to spiral into shower sex. And as lovely as that sounds, it’s not what Naomi needs, so he’s willing to forego his baser urges. Every once in a while she makes a comment about how amazing his hands are, but for the most part she’s blissfully silent.

He doesn’t stop with the massage until he’s absolutely sure she’s putty in his hands and all of the knots and spots of tension are gone. Even afterwards, they stay in the shower, his arm splayed across her midsection, his chin resting on top of her head.

“I don’t want to move,” Naomi says, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’m too comfortable right here. Can we just stay?”

Ethan chuckles softly to himself. “We can’t do that.”

“Why?”

“Well, the steam in here might actually suffocate us if we stay in here any longer,” Ethan starts. “And I’m not a fan of wasting water.”

“It’s not a waste if I’m enjoying it.”

“Touché. Not to mention your skin will get very dry, and you’ll be much more comfortable in my bed.”

“Okay, I guess you’ve made some valid points. We can leave now.”

She doesn’t make any effort to move, and Ethan quickly realizes he’s going to have to do all the work to get her out of here. He turns off the shower and opens the door, quickly inhaling. He didn’t realize how much he needed air until he was no longer in that glass box of steam.

He grabs two large bath towels off of the rack and dries them off. Naomi searches his countertop, now covered in her makeup and hair products until she finds a satin scrunchie to tie up her still damp hair.

They both meander back into Ethan’s bedroom, and Naomi searches through one of his spare drawers for something to wear. It’s full of her clothes, and a few items of his that she’s stolen over the past few months; a t-shirt here, a pair of socks there.

Once she’s bundled up in some of the warmest clothes she can find, Ethan ushers her into bed. “Are you ready for your pizza now?”

A stubborn yawn manages to slip out as she shakes her head. “No. I’ll get some before I head to work in the morning.”

“You’re not going to work tomorrow,” Ethan says.

“Excuse me?”

“You’re taking a much needed break tomorrow,” he continues. “I admire your tenacity, but I’m not going to let you work yourself to the bone and neglect your own needs in your very noble quest to help everyone in Boston. You won’t do Edenbrook any good if you collapse due to exhaustion.”

“But I–”

“I’m not asking you, Naomi, I’m telling you.” Despite his tone, a pleasant shiver runs down the length of her spine. “You’re staying here with me.”

She almost always has the upper hand in their arguments or debates, but Naomi can tell there’s no room for her to argue with him on this one. He won’t let her win.

“Okay,” she concedes. “No work tomorrow.”

Smug that he’s won this round, Ethan triumphantly slides into bed, wrapping an arm around Naomi, keeping her trapped with him. Unlike her, he didn’t put on any clothes, only a pair of boxers, but now Naomi is able to revel in his natural body heat.

He runs a thumb along her cheek, caressing her softly before kissing her forehead. “I am incredibly proud of you.”

“Really?”

“You’re an excellent doctor, and trust me when I say you’ve done more for this community that I’ll ever be able to put into words. And despite the hospital closing soon, I hope you realize the impact you’ve made in your two years here.”

Naomi nods, her throat getting thick with emotion. She’ll never be used to Ethan complimenting her like this. “I wish I could do more.”

“We all do. But at the end of the day, you’re still a human and you can only do so much.” Ethan’s hand moves from her face to her neck, his thumb tracing a pattern along her pulse. “I don’t want you to crash and burn, and best yourself up over something so completely out of your control.”

“Who are you and what have you done to Ethan Ramsey?” Naomi teases. She never thought she’d live to see a day where he’s scolding her for working too much and trying too hard.

“I’ve done a lot of reflecting recently, mostly due to you. If there’s any lesson you’ve taught me, it’s that there’s only so much I’m in control of.”

“Any other lessons or tokens of wisdom I’ve imparted on you.”

“You’ve taught me how to be more patient than I knew was possible,” Ethan replies. Naomi rolls her eyes at the slight teasing. “You’ve taught me how to see the world’s grey area. You taught me the true meaning of trust and forgiveness. You’ve shown me endless compassion and empathy, none that I’ll ever be able to repay in this lifetime or the next. I was your attending, your mentor, but trust me when I say you’ve taught me more than I could ever teach you, about medicine and life in general. So thank you.”

Maybe it’s the pure exhaustion or his really sweet words, but her eyes become wide and glossy with unshed tears. She blinks them away, not wanting to cry.

Instead she leans forward and pulls him into another kiss. She doesn’t know if she can convey the full extent of her love and adoration for him with a simple kiss, but Naomi’s never been the type to not try. When she pulls back, she rests her head against his chest, settling in comfortably.

“Thank you. For the kind words, and for taking care of me tonight. I’ve never had someone be as thoughtful as you.”

“I’ll always take care of you,” Ethan promises. He’ll give her the world if he can. “You just have to stop being so stubborn and let me do it.”

“I’m trying, I’m trying.”

“Now get some sleep,” Ethan commands. “Tomorrow, I’ll actually cook you a real meal. Not any of the garbage they serve at the hospital, and no more takeout, but–”

He stops short when he hears a soft snore fill the room. Looking down he sees that Naomi has managed to doze off in the mere seconds he was talking.

He’s never been so happy to watch someone sleep, as no one deserves it more than she does. He plants one final kiss on the crown of her head. “Goodnight, Naomi.”

~v~

Tags: @professorkingslay @nikki-2406 @maurine07 @aka-calliope @edgiestwinter @soft-for-drake @greenbean-kylie @akshara16 @bluebellot @honeyandsunfl0wers @blossomanarchy @takemyopenheart @fanmantrashcan @whatchique @ao719 @x-kyne-x @colourmeshy @paulfwesley @the-pale-goddess @writinghereandthere @ramseyandrys @perriewinklenerdie @aworldoffandoms @thatcatlady0716 @drakewalker04 @canknot @hatescapsicum @lapisreviewsstuff @senseofduties @badchoicesposts @ethandaddyramseyx @chasingrobbie @zodiacsign1 @choices-lurker @my-heart-beats-for-ya @adrian-motherfucking-raines @riverrune @edith-eggs1 @thatysn @bellcat2010 @theeccentricbibliophile @cecilecontrera @junehiratas @choices-love-affair @openheart12 @caseyvalentineramsey @desmaranj @nazario-sayeed @aestheticartsx @ruinedbypixels @mvalentine @nooruleman @rookie-ramsey

#playchoices #choices: stories you play #open heart #open heart 2 #ethan ramsey #dr. ethan ramsey #ethan x mc

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teenwolffan-with-nolife · 3 years

Text

The Witch and The Wolf Pt.47

Word Count: 2,681

Characters: Derek Hale (brief), Stiles Stilinski, Scott McCall, Isaac Lahey, Ethan and Aiden Steiner (mentioned), Allison Argent, Kira Yukimura, Noshiko Yukimura, the Nogitsune, Lydia Martin, Reader

Pairings: Eventual Derek Hale x Witch!Reader

Warnings: angst, brief fluff/ crack, death TW

A/N: ---

Masterlist Series Masterlist

“Medically, he’s okay,” you walked into the McCall House, seeing Melissa whispering to Scott.

Stiles was nowhere in sight, along with everyone else that was there before.

“How do we know if he’s really Stiles?” Scott asked.

You walked into Scott’s room, seeing Stiles laying on the bed.

“(Y/N),” he jumped out of bed, collapsing into your arms as you gasped slightly, in shock.

“Hey, Stiles,” you said softly.

“I-I’m so sorry,” he shook his head.

You wrapped your arms around him tightly.

“Really, don't worry about it. Come on,” you led him to his bed, while he sat in front of you, bouncing his leg anxiously.

“Uhm, Kira’s mom is on her way and she’s bringing the Oni with her to make sure it’s me,” his voice was shaky as he continued to look at the floor.

“Are you okay?” you put your hand on his shoulder, looking at him slightly concerned.

“I’m sorry,” he wrapped his arms around your waist once again, while resting his head on your stomach.

You stroked his hair softly, trying to calm him.

You made eye contact with Derek, seeing him frown slightly while you motioned him to leave.

“(Y/N)? Stiles? She’s here,” you heard Scott call.

You helped Stiles up, feeling him leaning on you while the two of you made your way to the living room.

You saw Noshiko standing in front of the three of you, surrounded by the Oni behind her.

“This is gonna sting,” you turned to Stiles.

He nodded his head, stepping forward as the Oni put their hand on the back of his neck, pulling him down slowly. Their eyes glew yellow, scanning Stiles.

He collapsed to the floor, shivering as you ran to him.

“Check,” Noshiko said.

You looked behind his ear, seeing a 5 marked on it.

“It’s him,” you nodded your head.

“Can the Oni track down the Nogitsune?” Scott asked her while you helped Stiles up, handing him a blanket.

“Tomorrow night. It’s too close to dawn,” she replied.

“(Y/N)? What about you?” Derek asked.

You closed your eyes briefly, trying to use your magic to track him.

“I-I don't know… The link’s broken. But, it’s not completely gone. There’s still a trace. I might be able to track it,” you replied.

“You won’t get far without the help of my Oni,” Noshiko warned.

“Well, I have to at least try. Would you know why he took Lydia?” you asked.

“Mainly because of her powers, I would assume,” Noshiko replied.

“The power of a banshee,” Scott realized.

“He wouldn't… he wouldn't kill her, right?” Stiles asked, a hint of nervousness in his tone.

“No, he won’t. We just have to find him and find him quick...” your eyes traveled to the clock.

6:24 AM

---

“Locus revelare,” you closed your eyes, searching through Beacon Hills for any sign of Lydia or the Nogitsune, being unsuccessful.

You groaned, resting your head in your hands, slightly frustrated.

“Anything?” Allison asked, walking into your room, Isaac close behind her.

“Nothing. It’s honestly like he just disappeared off the face of the Earth,” you groaned.

She handed you a napkin, motioning to your bloody nose as you groaned.

“Thanks,” you sighed.

“Yeah, no problem,” she replied.

“This is… frustrating,” Allison said.

“Very. Any luck on finding Lydia’s car?”

“No…actually, scratch that,” Isaac received a text on his phone.

“It’s in the Sheriff’s impound lot,” Isaac said.

“You guys, go. I need to head to Scott’s anyway. Be careful and call me if you need any help,” both Allison and Isaac wrapped their arms around you before you hugged them back.

“I don’t know what’s gonna happen tonight, but I need to let you both know that I care about you guys so much,” Allison looked between you and Isaac.

Your face softened as you stroked her cheek.

“Right back at you, kiddo. Stay safe, both of you,” they waved, walking out of your room while you gathered your things, heading to Scott’s.

---

“What does your book say about the Nogitsune? Anything?” Scott sat next to you.

Stiles was currently asleep on the couch.

“This book doesn't have anything. All my other ones burned in the fire, and I’m still trying to find them again. All I can tell you is that there is a link between Stiles and the Nogitsune,” you explained.

“Isn't that a good thing? Can’t you trace it?” he asked.

“I’m trying to, without hurting Stiles. He looks like he’s getting worse and if I try to find the Nogitsune through Stiles, it might even kill him,” you looked back at Stiles’ pale figure, shaking on the couch.

“I don't want to see my best friend like this,” Scott sighed.

“I know, kid. He’ll be okay. We can do this,” you said, softly stroking his cheek.

You could hear Stiles’ voice as you turned, seeing him sitting up and gasping for his breath.

“Stiles?” the two of you ran to him, helping him stand up.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay,” Scott said, trying to calm him.

“W-What’s going on?” he asked.

He took a step back from the two of you, breathing shakily.

“Your dad is at Eichen House, they’re all looking for that girl, Meredith. Everyone else is out looking for Lydia and I’m trying to find a spell or anything to help find them,” you explained.

“Well, did you find anything?” he asked.

His voice was still shaky, and you could tell that he was only getting worse.

“Actually…” Scott started.

“We didn't find anything,” you said quickly, interrupting him.

Scott frowned as you shook your head.

“Why does it feel like we’re waiting for a ransom call?” he sighed.

“Hey, it’ll be okay,” you put your hand on his shoulder while he pulled away, noticing something off.

You grabbed his hand, realizing they were shaking, and freezing.

“What the hell? You’re freezing, Stiles,” you frowned.

Scott held his hand, black veins appeared on Scott.

“You’re in pain,” Scott said.

“I’m just cold,” he pulled away from both of you, putting on his jacket.

“I just can't get warm,” you and Scott both knew something was wrong.

“Do you want me to take your pain?” Scott offered.

“I can heal you too,” you said.

“No, it’s fine. It’s not that bad, it’s like a dull aching sensation,” Stiles said.

“Where?” you asked.

“Sort of everywhere,” he sighed.

You two gave him a sorrowful look before Scott received a call from Kira, walking back from the two of you.

“You know, this is probably the longest time you’ve spent with us since Scott became a werewolf,” Stiles let out a small laugh, his teeth chattering.

“Yeah, I’m sorry about that,” you replied.

“Don’t worry about it, I’m just happy to have you here through all of this,” he sighed.

He rested his head on your shoulder while you pat his back.

“Hey, we gotta go, like now,” Scott ran to the two of you.

You raised an eyebrow, before the three of you took off.

---

“Where is she?” the three of you ran to Kira.

“I don’t know, she ran off,” she shook her head.

Scott raised his head up.

“She’s in the music room,” Scott said.

“Wait, we have a music room?” you said, slightly shocked.

Scott just gave you a blank look, before shaking his head.

“Come on.”

---

You saw Coach tase the orderly from Eichen, his twitching body falling to the ground.

You looked slightly impressed, while Stiles ran to Meredith.

“Coach, nice to see you again,” you nodded your head.

“Who the hell are you? Another new kid?” he replied.

Scott stifled a laugh while your face dropped.

“I literally graduated like less than a year ago. I went with you to that lacrosse meet that got canceled! I was in your class!” you exclaimed.

“Not ringing a bell. Just get the kid out of here, okay?” you rolled your eyes before the rest of you raced back to Scott’s house.

---

You were slightly shocked, seeing Isaac sitting nervously, with Rafael standing in front of him while the four of you ran into Scott’s house, backing up slightly.

“Who’s she?” Rafael pointed to Meredith.

“She’s… my girlfriend,” Stiles lied.

She backed away from Stiles before shaking her head.

“You’re not my type,” she shook her head.

Stiles’ face dropped, giving her a look.

“Well, we have some things to talk about,” Stiles pulled her arm softly.

“He’s my type,” she motioned to Isaac.

“Okay… Isaac can come too,” the three of them ran upstairs, leaving you standing with Scott and Rafael.

You could feel a strong tension in the air as Scott dug his nails into his fist.

“What are you doing here?” he asked.

You took a step back before Scott held your arm, trying to tell you to stay with him.

“I need to talk to you,” Rafael replied.

“I can’t right now,” he replied.

You heard your phone ringing as you let out the breath you didn't know you were holding, seeing Derek’s name flash across your screen.

“Uh, sorry, gotta go,” you quickly pulled away from Scott, while he mouthed for you to stay before you ran upstairs.

“I think you just saved me,” you sighed, answering the phone.

“Uh, you’re welcome I think? Look, Ethan and Aiden were trying to find Lydia’s scent, until someone started shooting wolfsbane at them,” Derek replied.

“WBhat? Where are you guys now?” your face dropped.

“We’re hiding out in a coyote den right now. But that's not the main thing. I’m pretty sure it’s Araya who’s shooting at us,” Derek said.

Araya? Realization hit you soon after.

“How did she find… are you okay?” you asked.

“We’re fine. I’m just warning you. Be safe. I don’t know what she's here for,” Derek replied.

“Okay… we have Meredith with us, we’re one step closer to finding Lydia and finding the Nogitsune,” you explained.

“That’s… be careful (Y/N/N),” he said.

You nodded your head softly before replying.

“You too. Don’t end up dead,” you said.

“Right back at you,” you let out a small, shaky laugh before hanging up the call, feeling a familiar pang in your chest.

It was worry. No matter how much you tried to stop it, you kept thinking about Derek and kept worrying about him. You reminded yourself once again that nothing good ever came of it and you were only making yourselves fall farther apart.

You shook your head, walking into Scott's room.

“No, we’re not gonna torture her!” you heard Stiles say in a hushed voice, him and Isaac in the bathroom.

Meredith sat silently on Scott’s bed, rocking back and forth.

“Hey there,” you squatted down, looking her in the eye.

“You don’t know where Lydia is, do you?” you asked softly.

“She’s not telling me,” she shook her head.

“I meant scare her,” you heard Isaac say.

“We’re not gonna psychologically torture her either!” Stiles yelled back.

You gave them a look before Meredith called out, the boys rushing back.

“Aren’t… aren’t you gonna answer that?” Meredith motioned to your phone as you frowned slightly.

She’s a banshee, right

“Oh, right. Uh, hello?” your phone was off as you pressed it against your ear.

You pretended to talk to someone, handing her the phone.

“It’s for you,” you said.

“Hello?” she asked.

You turned to Stiles, who shrugged.

“Torture shouldn't be your first answer, you know,” you whispered to Isaac.

He sighed before Meredith handed you back your phone.

“Coup de foudre,” she said.

Coup de foudre?

“W-What is that? Spanish?” Stiles asked.

“No, it’s French. Love at first sight. What the hell does that mean?” you frowned.

“I know what it means,” you turned around to see Scott running into the room.

“Camp Oak Creek. We have to go.”

---

“Look, if no one else is gonna say it, I will. Stiles, you look like crap. You look like you got worse,” you sighed, hearing Isaac as the four of you drove in Stiles’ car, on your way to Oak Creek.

You rested your head on your hand, giving Isaac a look.

“And when we find this other you, is he gonna look better or worse? What happens if he gets hurt?” Isaac asked.

“You mean if he dies, do I die? I don’t care, as long as no one else gets hurt because of me,” your face fell as you sat up.

“Stiles,” you started.

“No, (Y/N). I remember everything I did. From… From stabbing Scott to stabbing you, setting your apartment on fire… forcing you to take your powers back,” his voice wavered as you sighed softly.

“Stiles, that wasn't you,” you started.

“Yeah, but I remember it. You all have to promise me, you can’t let anyone else get hurt because of me,” Stiles turned to face Scott, then you and Isaac.

You shook your head.

“You can't put what he did on yourself, that wasn't you,” you said again.

“It wasn't me? I remember you screaming my name, begging me to stop,” Stiles raised his voice slightly, leaving you quiet, with nothing to say.

You felt Scott's and Isaac's eyes on you before you sighed, leaning back in your chair. You had to come up with a plan to save Stiles, whatever the outcome was.

---

“We've done this before, you guys. We’ve all gathered together to save lives before. They were total strangers, this is Lydia,” you all nodded, meeting Kira and Allison at Camp Oak Creek.

The group of you stood outside the gates.

“What are we gonna do about my mom?” you heard Kira ask.

“Well, we’ll need to split up. Kira, you’re probably the only person who can get through to your mom. Half of us will stay with Kira, and half of us will go find Lydia, deal?” you suggested.

They all nodded in agreement.

“Keep your weapons close, Allison,” you looked around the camp before you, Stiles, and Scott ran into the building.

---

“I-I can’t smell her anywhere,” Scott shook his head worriedly, the three of you running down the corridors.

“Inveniet eam,” you looked around, running forward with Scott and Stiles behind you.

You turned right, spotting an empty room, behind a locked door.

“Patentibus,” you used your magic to push the door open, spotting Lydia backed against the wall.

“What are you doing here?! I told you not to come!” she yelled, running to you three.

“What?” Stiles asked as you frowned.

“Lydia, we’re here to save you,” you shook your head.

“Who else came with you?!” she yelled.

“Allison, Kira, and Isaac,” Scott said.

“Someone’s gonna die,” her eyes watered slightly in panic.

You felt your heart stop out of worry for your friends.

“We gotta go,” the four of you ran down the hall.

Stiles called out, collapsing over as you turned to look at him, you and Lydia stopping.

Scott continued to run down the alley, while you sat on your knees, lifting Stiles’ head up.

“Stiles?” you said softly.

You heard a loud screeching noise, as your head shot up.

“Go, I’ll stay with him,” Lydia said.

You froze, before nodding, getting up and running to the rest of them.

Isaac was on the floor, blood dripping from his body while Scott cried out, holding Allison’s body.

Your eyes watered, feeling your chest aching harshly. There was a loud ringing in your ears, seeing Allison’s body limp.

“I-Isaac,” your voice broke as you ran to him.

You continued looking at Allison, your tears slipping down your cheek.

“S-She’s dead… (Y/N),” Isaac cried softly, as you wrapped your arms around him. You pressed a kiss to his forehead, feeling your tears slipping as you sniffled, trying to comfort Isaac.

“Allison…” you could hear Scott crying out as you shut your eyes tightly.

You could hear Scott’s cries as you held back your own cries, biting down on your lip hard.

“I-I… We need to call Chris,” your hand was shaking as you reached for your phone, dialing his number.

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leahseclipse · 3 years

Text

Confessions, surprises and joyful events

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Summary: What worse thing could happen other than calm and nice coffee dates when the genius resident happens to forget items when suddenly called in, causing their secret to come out?

Warnings: Mentions of losing someone, death (not concerning any of the characters); usual cm stuff, but otherwise, its just fluff

Category: Fluff

Word count: 13.5k

A/N: And here’s the last fic of this ‘kinda’ series!!! yesh I know the summary sucks LMAO, but- I hope you guys will like it, I apologize if some moments are ehhh, especially towards the end, I’ve been working on it for a while and as the total is 25k, I really had no other idea, I really drained them all into that massive one-

And that one is still attached to the prevs fics I had wrote for the fic swap for @sunlight-moonrise :)

Continuation of Dear diary, and Souvenirs, secrets and coffee dates

This night went better than expected. We didn’t go to bed at 2 -for once-, but around 11:30 PM, so even if it’s still late, it’s better than nothing.

Considering all of the stuff we have to do today, and probably in the next few days, we couldn’t allow ourselves to go to bed at the hour people usually get up for work, such as 6AM...or more.

And it would also be a lie to say that we didn’t go to bed at this hour once.

Nonetheless, we both were excited about the activities of the day, and if I’m not wrong, we’re at our fourth coffee mission-date.

Yeah, none of us figured out a proper and official title for it, so we’ve just been altering between dates and mission.

At the same time, it’s a date, it’s been a while since we haven’t got to have a moment to ourselves, and it’s also -as said- a mission. We like to set small challenges, especially when we happen to have time like this week.

Talking about this week, I have to admit that not receiving a call has stayed quite surprising, even now. Before we had the idea of doing our coffee dates, I had just come back from almost two weeks of work.

I had been away for a week, had just three days of ‘vacation time’, and had been called back for another week. So, I think that it's not weird at all to be surprised, all of us probably are.

I just hope they won’t decide to have a party or something, because I can never find myself to refuse and find a proper excuse that doesn’t raise suspicions, now that I have a girlfriend.

I can’t believe that I almost used Ethan as an excuse to not attend once, and the idiot I am forgot he happened to be in New Orleans at this time.

Basically all planes were cancelled because of the weather, and if I had happened to let his name slip, as they probably know that I know him, they would have wanted to know more...especially Penelope.

And the idiot I still am would have tried to find another excuse, that -of course- would have miserably failed as well.

I just hope we’ll get to have a few more days before I eventually get called back, it’d be nice.

It’d also be nice if I would stop to think about a possible call, because if y/n would hear me she’d complain about me bringing bad luck.

Normally as it is only some superstitions, it doesn’t happen, but again -as expected-, last time when I had said that a possible call was coming, I received one just two days later.

So, I think that I’m gonna pass on this subject.

I also wish I didn’t have to be the one responsible for waking her up; she’s...quite difficult when it comes to that, and most of the time, we’ll either end up being 30 minutes late, or just not go where we had to at all.

But since what we were supposed to do was important, she really had to get up, even if I had to drag her out of the bed.

“Y/N, come on, I’ve been trying to get you out of the bed since nine, and even gave you twenty minutes more.”

“Jus’ a bit more…”

“Alright, I’ll go to the library all day then.”

“No, you’re stayin’ with me.” She said, as she sat up and grabbed my sleeve.

“You want me to help you get ready?”

“Mhm.”

“Okay, give me your hand.” I extended mine, as she lazily took it. “There you go sleepy head.”

“I’m not a sleepy head. It’s my morning head, that’s all.”

“Your morning head is a sleepy one.”

“No, it’s a well-rested one.”

“Okay, you won the fight.”

“I always win arguments.” She proudly announced, while she got up, stretching up a bit. “So...are we going to the one we saw on internet yesterday, it really had good reviews, and a nice website, which is...a good sign usually.”

“Yeah, it is. It really sounded nice, plus I think I’ve heard about it from other people, and they’ve had pretty good experiences. I say we go for it, might as well enjoy it before...work calls again.”

“You’re going to bring us bad luck, stop with that.”

“It counts for you as well. You mentioned it yesterday.”

“...I didn’t.”

“You did.”

“No, I’m sure your brain is tricking you.”

“Once again, I am sure it’s not. I know my brain well, and it never lies.”

“Pff, you know your brain? I’ve never heard such a ridiculous thing.”

“Says the-girl-who-forgets-her-stuff.”

“Hey! Don’t use that nickname, the diary story was an accident.”

“You didn’t trust yourself enough that you had to give me your number.”

“No, it wasn’t for that, I just wanted to chat.”

“Even years later, you still lie.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Mhm.”

“Okay, one more remark, and instead of going out, I’m making you clean my whole apartment for a week.”

“...I’m going to get ready.”

“That’s what I thought genius.”

“Why am I being called ‘genius’ when I’m not supposed to call you ‘the-girl-who-forgets-her-stuff?’, hm?” I joked.

“Everyone calls you genius at work, see it as a third name.”

“Then if what I call you is your name, it’s kind of long. Y/N, Y/M/N, the-girl-who-forgets-her-stuff, Y/L/N.”

“Okay, if I stop using genius, will you stop with that?”

“...maybe.” I answered, as she hit me with her shirt. “Okay, okay! I’ll stop!”

“You’re really nice when you want, see?”

“I’m not a puppy either.”

“You have puppy eyes, same stuff.” She briefly said.

“Who says?”

“Me.”

“Only you is not enough to be convincing.”

“Who says?” She repeats.

“Do you want me to get the excuse I took at the library?”

“Which?” Y/N asked, visibly confused.

“That you had to be more polite, else, I won’t listen.”

“I’m going to warm up the car.” She grabs the keys, changing the subject.

“I love to mess with you.”

“Shut up.” She says before leaving, earning a sneaky laugh from me.

When I had gotten out of the building after a few minutes, I swore that Y/N could have left without me if I would have tried to mess with her again.

She didn’t though, but she warned me (jokingly, she had said…), that she wouldn’t have hesitated a bit.

In most cases, she really isn’t kidding, and wasn’t at all this time.

The only thing I got when I had gotten in the car was a hit on the arm, that...kinda still hurt for a bit even after a few minutes.

But, we both know it wasn’t serious. We often do that, and we usually make jokes like ‘I’m going to murder you and pretend someone killed you in the night’, ‘I’m gonna have Hotch yell at you by making you late’, or even, her favorite one, ‘I’m gonna steal your phone and announce our relationship.’.

Which….when it was told after a few months we began dating, would stop the teasing from me, and end in a fit of laughter, as we would discuss it; and jump to other subjects.

That joke is less...uncomfortable, or the kind to stop the conversation, as we really talked about it, and kind of planned to say it before we’d end up married with two kids.

I know that they’ll be happy whether I announce it while she’s my girlfriend, or my wife, and mother of my kids, but still, it’s been a while, and I think that they deserve to know, they’re like family to me.

Even my mother, who had just met them a few times, appreciates them a lot.

But once they’ll know, Y/N will have to prepare herself; because she’s gonna receive a lot of questions from Garcia, who’s probably going to get her to come as often as possible; some messages from the team, a lot of invitations, because to be honest, they’ll all be really surprised that I got a girlfriend, and as it’s been a while, they’ll have a lot to ask and tell.

I just hope that they won’t...mention what happened in my early days.

Some stories are kind of embarrassing, and not really nice to recall to me.

Knowing Morgan’s, he’s either going to mention what happened with Lila Archer, or the gun qualification that I failed (but, that I got, after I shot between a guy’s eyes in one shot, so this story will only be half bad).

...he could also tell both.

But, I know for sure that they’ll welcome her with open arms. They’ll really appreciate her.

She’s done a lot for me, and I can really say that she...somehow made my life better, in a way (She says that I’m cheesy, when I say that).

I honestly have no idea what would have happened if she took her diary back before I even got to see it, I would have never paid attention to the shop on my way as usual, I would only go to the library for the usual reason, my life wouldn’t have changed even a bit.

I like to say that fate has reunited us, but in another way, I like that she happened to be so distracted to the point of forgetting it.

I can’t really imagine having to not see her anymore; we’ve been so used to each other that we constantly have to see each other, and at least hear the other’s voice if I’m at work.

Literally, all of the free time that we have, it’s spent with the other.

We also happen to hang out with our friends, but most of the time; we’re always together.

I noticed that we don’t tend to go outside often, we both prefer to stay outside, and once, we even cancelled plans at the restaurant at the last minute as we were both too lazy to even get ready.

That also happened in the morning; none of us had work, and we decided to spend most of the day in bed, and we didn't do even anything till a few hours, we just talked and cuddled.

So, these coffee dates are kind of a miracle; because knowing our shared laziness, we wouldn’t have done that at all.

It’s our fourth one today, and it's going pretty well.

I’ve thrown facts the whole time, and she didn’t mind.

She actually asked for others, at each of them.

Y/N was totally into it.

And that kind of made me laugh, I even said that she looked like a nerd, or even a teacher’s pet.

That’s why we enjoyed it, we laughed a lot during those, and actually planned to go outside more, which is...totally crazy.

I don’t know what is happening to us, but, some miracle fought off our laziness, and now, we’re going outside a lot.

Our coffee dates also made y/n drive more.

She would never touch the wheel, unless if it was at 1am for emergency snacks, and now, she insists every time.

I think I’ve only driven at the first, but not fully, as she took over on the way back.

We’ve also discovered a lot of coffee shops, I’ve walked in front of some, but never actually went inside.

I guess our coffee dates are mainly us, testing out what they have, and when we’ll run out of shops; we’ll basically try to choose the best.

She even purchased a notebook for us to put our ratings in.

I really never saw her taking something so seriously.

She also created another folder on her phones, with a lot of pics. The majority of them have my face, and she took most of them when I was looking away.

Y/N mentioned that she really likes my side profile, which at the moment was...kind of weird, but, I got used to it, and even looked on the side on purpose as I knew she’d taken a picture without fail.

I think that she has one where I’m turning around; she didn’t get to take my side profile before I turned, it was kind of blurry, but I insisted on keeping it.

We might print the pictures and make a scrapbook at this point; it would be fun.

I know she’ll like the idea.

“Okay, so...are we ordering one of the basics, or are we going a bit fancy today?” Y/N asked.

“Go for the fancy option, that’ll change.”

“Alright, you go get settled, and I’ll be right back.” She said, kissing my nose at “right”. I always like that.

She knows every single thing that makes me happy. It’s kind of crazy, she almost knows me better than I do.

I’m also pretty sure she knows that I hate when she goes away, even if she’s two meters away, and is going to come back in just a bit.

I just really like to be with her, and this might be childish or something, but I almost got her late once because I didn’t want her to go yet once.

At least I won’t have to do that this week. None of us have work, and I just have to hope I won’t be called in.

I’m the only one that could completely cancel our plans, and even though I know she won’t be angry as we managed to get five days without a call disturbing us, it’ll still somehow leave a bitter feeling.

She told me to stop worrying, and just, enjoy the moment, but I just can’t help but think about it, and even though she’s not a profiler, she can tell when I’m worrying about something.

So, might as well quit worrying, and just enjoy our dates, because always thinking about the calls might end up bringing us bad luck as she constantly says.

Y/N even has a sticky note on her desk counting how many times I’ve either worried about it, and brought up the subject.

So far...I’ve said it about seven times, and it’ll probably turn to eight if she notices.

“You know, you can say it if there’s something wrong.”

There goes the possible eighth time.

“Oh, sorry, what did you say?”

“I see it that something is bothering you. Did you prefer us to stay home today?”

“No, no, not at all! I really wanted to go out with you. It’s not the problem.”

“So, what’s the actual problem?”

“You know it.”

“Oh, quit that cellphone. Just smash it on the ground and wait for them to come.”

“You know that’s not how it works.”

“That’s the only wait for you to stop worrying. That’s the eighth time.”

“It’s not even the eighth at this point, it’s the fortieth.”

“Or the hundredth.”

“Yeah, I got it. I worry a lot.”

“I’m not even a profiler and I can just tell like that. Quit your job and let me take your spot, I’m gonna impress them all.”

“Are you going to enjoy the ‘waking up at 4am’, ‘being away for a week’, ‘risking getting killed’ parts though?”

“...not the ‘4am’ one, no.”

“Try applying as a secretary, maybe. It’s calm.”

“If I have enough of my job at the craft job, okay. I’ll make sure to be in the same section. I’m gonna be the best secretary they’ll ever see.”

“You’re going to make us late though. When I’ll have to leave you’re gonna try to get a few more seconds to talk with me.”

“I may.”

“Hotch’s not going to like this.”

“Eh, he won’t say anything. We’re two young people in love, so, if he doesn’t have a rock heart as...you always tell me how strict he’s...he’ll be okay with it.”

“Not if it happens a lot. I tell you. Hotch isn’t kidding when it comes to that. He may accept some occasional late reports, but not a late arrival when we have to immediately go on the field.”

“Okay, then I won’t do it.”

“...one or two times won’t hurt. If we do one a week, and the other two weeks and...a half later, maybe it’ll pass. Who knows?” I suggested.

“I don’t want you to get fired. This job is important.”

“...yeah, kind of.”

“Plus, we have to tell them, at least before you get fired.” She joked.

“If I get fired, I won’t have to tell them as I won’t see them as often as I want. I’ll have another job and we’ll all be busy.”

“It’s kind of smart but...don’t you dare do that. That’s not genius.”

“You suggested something, and I went along with it. You started it, not me.”

“A suggestion isn’t an obligation, or a serious thing. I never forced you to do it. It was only “if”, never said anything serious.”

“You know that I always take you seriously.”

“Too seriously that you couldn’t catch jokes.”

“I understood it, I just played along with you.”

“If I hadn’t interrupted you, it looked like you would have almost done it.”

“I wasn’t going to.”

“Mhm.”

“Did you really think I’d do it?”

“Knowing you...there was a chance you would have done it. A slim one.”

“Really?”

“Yep.” She honestly answered, taking a sip of her coffee as she kept her glance on me.

“I wouldn’t do it, it was only a joke, nothing more. Even if it’s...full of pretty big risks, I still enjoy it.”

“It’s scary as hell, yeah. And even though I’m not with you, I still feel the stress.”

“I have to admit that I scared you...a lot.”

“You bet. The ‘out of battery’ days really scared me.”

“Yeah, sorry for that.”

“It’s okay, I’m not mad. You’re still there, and now we’re on...I still didn’t find a name for it.”

“What was the original name already?” I asked.

“Coffee mission slash dates. Not amazing.”

“We can’t really settle on only one at the same time.”

“We can’t. But at the same moment, we kind of have to choose one.”

“Coffee mission slash dates isn’t the best, but it’s the only thing we could think about, it’s better than not having one.”

“You’re kinda right. It’s okay if we keep that one.”

“I guess so.”

“By the way, as...I see we’re basically done. What are we saying for this one? Do you want to try something else before we write our review?” She asked.

“We can have another one. Only roughly 80 to 100 cups of coffee would turn into a lethal dose, so...it should be okay.”

“It’s kind of morbid, and creepy.”

“It’s still useful to know it.”

“I didn’t need to know that my source of energy can kill me. Now I think that I may have to slow down.”

“It can kill me too. I drink way too much when I’m at work then at home.”

“Imagine that the autopsy guy has to say to your family that you died because of a caffeine overdose. That’d be...either dumb, or embarassing. Gosh, it’s not funny.”

“Yeah, sorry. That fact was just stuck in my head.”

“Choose less morbid ones next time.”

“Don’t worry-”

“Yeah. So, uh, didn’t you say you wanted to try that one too? It sounds cool.”

“Why not, okay.”

“Okay, I’m going. You stay there.”

“But- You don’t have to.”

“I’m going, it’s okay.”

“Pff, ok. You can go.”

“I’ll be right back anyway. Don’t be sad.”

“I’m not sad.”

“Is that so? You should have seen your face.”

“I wasn’t sad.”

“If you say so.” She said, before leaving as she headed to the counter again.

We’re really little kids sometimes.

Maybe that’s why we get along.

We’re more childish than serious most of the time.

On that, we’re kind of equal I’d say, but...it depends.

I’m the childish one these days.

I still haven’t found a way to announce her to them, because...even if I really like them, I still don’t really want to.

It’s mostly for security reasons, with all that happened during my years, I’m kind of afraid.

I’ll have to tell them one day, eventually though.

They’re gonna bug me even more if I wait too much.

“Stop overthinking.” Y/N interrupted, as she set the two cups on the table.

“I can’t.”

“You have to, eventually. If this is about the cellphone, or not having enough dates, or even, that we have to tell them, you have to stop. We already had four, it’s a miracle.”

“To be honest, yeah. I wouldn’t hope we’ll have more.”

“What about we tell them if we get another one?”

“I’m gonna receive a call before.”

“No, we won’t. I’m the one between the two of us that bring us luck. So, we’ll have our fifth one.”

“Okay, we’ll see. Even if I’m not really sure. But, I hope we do though.”

“I can guarantee we’ll have it. Now drink your coffee before it gets cold.”

“Cold coffee isn’t bad.”

“Yes it is! That one isn’t meant to be drunk cold. If it had ice, then yeah.”

“Stop criticizing my choices, it’s not nice!”

“Your choices are so bad that I have to be on your back.”

“You’re not my mom.”

“...you sure about that? I’ve acted as your mom a lot of times because of some of your choices. I don’t even remember them all, there’s so many.”

“Not a lot. That’s why you don’t remember.”

“I don’t have your brain, but I remember some.”

“I’m not that immature, and...irresponsible.”

“Okay, you’re not that immature. I exaggerated.”

“It’s nice of you to admit your mistake.” I joked.

“I’m gonna take my words back, be careful. I might not even wake you up if you get a call. That way you’ll have Hotch yell at you.”

“You’ll make coffee for yourself, that’ll wake me up.”

“How?”

“The smell of coffee can help you wake up in the morning.”

“Hm. Guess we don’t need alarms then. You’ll build us a machine that automatically starts the machine and we’ll be up in no time.”

“At this rate, we could also install a webcam in front of it, if we do it every morning, at each nap, and all day.

“A webcam?”

“I saw somewhere that people working at the University of Cambridge knew the feeling of finding an empty coffee pot so well, that they invented the first ever webcam with the sole purpose of checking the status of the coffee pot.”

“That’s actually kinda smart.”

“I know, right? That way we don’t have to check, but the one that’ll have to fill it back up will receive tons of notifications, so it'll kind of be annoying.”

“...yeah. I don’t want it anymore.”

“You’ll probably be the one receiving the notifications more often since you’ll be home.”

“That’s why I changed my mind. I don’t want you to see how often I drink, because...trust me it’s a lot.”

“...I do the same at work.”

“That’s why we get along. We get each other, basically have the same habits. We’re the perfect couple.”

“You kind of sound drunk when you say that, I don’t know. It sounds like something you’d say while being drunk.”

“Kind of, yeah.” She agreed, laughing. “Throw another fact, we’ll continue in the car.”

“Let me think...oh, I got one. From statistics, the average American spends around $20 a week on coffee, which is around...$1.092 per year. Yikes.”

“What keeps us awake when we’re running on two hours of sleep makes us broke. Cool.”

“That’s where our salaries go.”

“...yep. That’s where. Surprise.”

“I don’t think they’ll really be surprised. Look how many hours we sleep. My sleep schedule is already buried.”

“Yeah, it is. Remember all the days where we went to bed at 1am and you got woken up at 4am? The next days were hell to stay awake.”

“...I remember. I hate those days. if I get a phone call, let me have five or six hours at least.”

“I’m starting to wonder if they’re not spying on us to see at which hour we go to bed.”

“Same. It happened way too many times. It’s getting quite...annoying.”

“Not really for me, I’d wake up because of the phone one time out of two. It was more annoying when I’d wake up to see I was alone.”

“You’d have a note, at least.”

“Yep, but....wasn’t amazing.”

“You would have been angry either way if I would have woken you up.”

“I would have gone straight back, yeah. You’re not wrong.”

“I’m always right. I’m not the best in the whole FBI building for nothing.”

“Quit showing off. We know you’re smart.”

“It was just in case you forgot.”

“How could I forget? You tell me that you have an 187 IQ without telling it every time you speak. It’s kind of obvious that you’re not an idiot to me.”

“You’re smart too, you could figure out that I was.”

“Is there a meaning behind that or…?”

“Why would there be one y/n?”

“I don’t know. You sound...narcissistic, and it was kind of like...you told I was dumb, Reid.”

“No, you’re not! I was kidding.”

“Mhm.”

“Okay, I’m sorry if I sounded ‘narcissistic’, it wasn’t my intention, I was just kidding.”

“I just have trouble knowing if you’re joking or not sometimes. But, you are forgiven, doctor.”

“It’s weird hearing you say that. Why don’t you just say ‘Spencer’?”

“Doctor, and Reid are more...fancy.”

“Okay, if you like it.”

“I do like it.”

“Then I don’t have anything to say on it.”

“Indeed.” She proudly replied.

“You know that I really like you?"

"I do." She answered, her shy smile breaking into a bigger one.

"Are you okay with uh...cheesy stuff? Because like, it kind of is."

"I've always had a liking for these, so I don't mind at all."

"Oh- okay, I was afraid you wouldn't uh…."

"...like it? Of course I do. I always like it when you say that you love me."

"I can't say otherwise, or even refrain myself from saying it. When I see you smile, I just...you know. I really like to see you happy."

"You're gonna make me cry Spencer- I spent a while doing my makeup." She joked.

"Okay, I'll wait until we're at home then."

"Okay."

"It's kinda good that we came in early. Coffee is better when it's taken between 9:30 to 11:30AM from what I saw."

"...really? There's a 'good timing' for it to be more effective? It's weird."

"Kind of. If you're tired at 11pm and decide to drink it, it's only gonna work at 50%."

"For real...it's annoying. Especially for you, your shifts are long as hell. I'm sorry for all the times I yelled at you over the phone."

"You had your reasons, I'm the best at getting people worried to death." He said, as he got his eyes back on the road after briefly shaking his head at her.

"Can't deny."

"No one can't."

"The number of times when you only had a battery problem, gosh. I wanted to kill you because of these."

"You didn't kill me, I'm still here."

"I can still kill you, if you want. I might have a pocket knife somewhere."

"No- I take it back, it's ok. I'm good." I said, "panicking".

"Hm. Too bad. It was a new one, 'wanted to try it on."

"...that's not really reassuring y/n."

"At least you'll be even more careful." She said, throwing me a sneaky smile.

"...will do."

"Good to know."

"I was going to say that you were going to be the death of me, but I'm already doing that to you with my job. Guess I'll have to find something else."

"You're gonna have to think hard. Because from what you said, your job is superior to everything in terms of scaring the death out of people."

"The #1."

"Premium #1. It's a better term." She corrected.

"...do you still love me though?"

"Of course, that's why I haven't killed you yet."

"I'm gonna have to sleep with one eye tonight."

"It's gonna be creepy man. I won't kill you, so, don't do that...please"

"I love how it's easy to make you change your mind with things you hate."

"I can still change my mind, even if I hate it."

"...sorry." I apologized with a tiny voice, which caused us to break into laughter for a minute, before I stopped before y/n, who still had a bit of trouble to stop laughing. "Do I need to call 911 or is everything okay?"

"It's just- your tiny voice is always fun as hell- gosh, I really had a good laugh."

"We don't need much to laugh apparently.' I pointed out.

"How can anybody not laugh at that? The way you said it was amazing."

"I'm gonna be offended if you keep laughing at me."

"I can't promise you I won't laugh again ah that."

"If you laugh at my voice, I'm allowed to laugh at you when you fall out of bed then."

"Okay, deal. You're allowed."

"At least it's even. But- you can't go back on that, you said you agreed on it."

"I promise, I'm not going back on it." She confirmed.

“Okay, just so it’s clear.”

“It is. I granted you permission to laugh at me.”

“I never granted you permission and you did it a lot of times, that’s not fair.”

“I’m allowed to laugh at you, it’s not the same. I have a special “nice girlfriend” pass.”

“...okay you have a point.”

“I’ve always had it. I’m smart, maybe smarter than you. The FBI should seriously hire me, they’re missing out without me.”

“We’re never going to be able to focus if we work together.”

“Then I guess you’ll have to present me.”

“Prepare yourself in advance. Once they’ll get your number, you’re gonna be overwhelmed with texts. They’re gonna want to know about the secret I kept.”

“Don’t worry about that, I’ve been thinking about it for a while. I may have to go there myself if you chicken out.”

“Hey, that’s not nice. I’m hurt.”

“Okay- I may have to go there myself if you don’t resolve yourself to do it- oh, it’s the same. Even if I word it differently, it’s the same.”

“I’m mad at you.”

“No, you’re not. You love me too much to be mad at me.”

“...how do you know everything about me? I’m scared.”

“I hacked into your brain.”

“Clearly.” I said; nervously laughing. “What do you think would be the password of my brain?”

“Um...either a doctor who or star trek related thing.”

“Hm. Maybe. It’s kinda difficult though; I like a lot of things. I’d probably end up putting your name if I can’t decide.”

“Yeah, same. There’s so much stuff.”

“If I take all of the books, tv shows, writers….yeah. Your name.”

“I’d probably struggle too. Your name.” She repeated.

“Isn’t it risky to let the other know our passwords?”

“I mean...we share the same brain cells sometimes, we’re 24/7 together, we’re interested in the same stuff so...eh. Not really.”

“That’s fair enough to be honest. I still remember last time; when we forgot to take the pasta out of the water because a video on twitter distracted us.”

“...I remember that. We had to order takeout after.”

“And the takeout wasn’t that good. I would have prefered the over-boiled pasta.”

“Same...these $35 weren’t that worth it.”

“$5 dollar over boiled pasta would have been better.”

“Yeah, it would have. But, let’s not try to forget it tonight. Over-boiled pasta isn’t my favorite thing.”

“Then we’ll have to turn off all of our devices.”

“...yeah. Let’s hope the clock won’t fail on us.”

“I’m not even sure if we have batteries left, and the store is closed.”

“Guess it’s gonna be one hell of a night.” She pointed out, as the car came to a stop.

“You said it.” I answered, as we both exited the car.

“Spencer, hey, wake up.”

“What’s...going on?”

“ ‘thing’s ringing.”

“What the…?” He mumbled as he took his phone from his nightstand, rubbing his eyes. “Oh, come on.”

“Guess we’re not having our fifth date.”

“...guess not. This sucks, I’m sorry.”

“ ‘s not your fault. At least let me have a quick hug before you go for god knows how long.”

“Just one, I really have to go.” I precised, wrapping my arms around her waist, as she put her head in the crook of my neck.

“I’m gonna miss you Spence.”

“Me too. I promise it won’t be too long.”

“Mhm. Oh, at least it’s not 4AM.”

“Yeah, it kind of surprised me to see that it was 9AM.”

“Same. Are you directly going on the jet or are you gonna uh...what’s the thing, briefing at the office?”

“Uh, yeah, Morgan told me to go to the office first.”

“Okay, call me before you go then.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll call.” I reassured, kissing her on the cheek as I sprinted through the hall. “Have a good day!”

“Same!” She yelled, as I closed the door.

What a great week ahead of us.

I annoyedly sighed as I got out of the building, taking the car as she had mentioned that she wouldn’t need it today.

I kind of felt bad, we had taken a small break on coffee mission-dates as we didn’t feel like it, and in the meantime, she also went to work for a day as a coworker needed someone to replace her, and after that, just when we planned to go out again...my phone rang, which was nothing but good.

I’ll make sure to call her as often as I can, that’s the least I can do till I come back.

As he left, I kind of ‘slept’ for at least ten minutes before I even found the motivation to get out of bed, which was kind of hard.

I’m really attached to my bed, and it’s really complicated for me to get up in the morning, Spencer helps me out usually.

It’s a miracle I managed to get out before falling back asleep and waking up at 12, especially on my own.

It’s kind of a great achievement to be honest, I should call him later to…

I paused, as I saw what seemed like his phone on the table.

...guess I’m not gonna call him.

What the hell am I going to do?

I can’t go there, no one even knows me.

Why did he have to forget his damn phone?

He doesn’t even have another one, how the hell am I going to do to get it to him?

I just...know his code, he randomly told it to me, and he knows mine too, so...yeah.

For god’s sake, I’m gonna have to call in, ‘I’m a cousin, friend, whatever’ excuse is gonna have to be the one I’m gonna throw.

Now or never I guess.

I turned on the phone, entering the password as I opened the contacts app, not really knowing who to call.

He had mentioned that Hotch was his superior, but I would be a stressed mess the second he’d begin taking, and it wouldn’t do anything but waste time.

What about Penelope? She seemed quite nice from his sayings, I could possibly reach out to her.

Let’s give it a try, I guess.

I clicked on the contact, pressing the call button as I brought the phone to my ear.

“Spencer, why are you calling? Aren’t you with Luke in the conference room?”

“It’s not Reid, I’m...a friend. He forgot his phone...and his badge thingy at my place, I saw the second thing as I called. I uh...didn't know he was working so I went to his place, and I guess he’s at work now.”

“Huh, he never forgets it. That’s weird. But, I never heard about you, are you like...a school pal or whatever person he met at a library or other?”

“Uh...We knew each other at school, yeah- anyway, is there a way for me to take it to him? I’ve...never been to his place, you know.”

“Oh uh...I can go see him, he’s right there. You could come here, but...I don’t know if you’re cleared to go here. Let me...oh, is your name y/n...y/l/n?”

“Yeah- did he put me in his emergency contacts or…?”

“Well, you’re in the visitor lists, so, I guess so, in a way, yeah. You must be an important friend then.”

“Yeah- we know...each other for a while- yeah.”

“That’s weird, he never mentioned you. I’ll have to ask about you later, I’m kind of interested.”

“Yeah- uh, he’s working at the FBI building, right? What floor is it even?”

“Yes, it’s that. It’s the sixth, you’ll have to hurry though, they should be going soon.”

“I’ll be right there. See you...I guess.”

“See you there!”

Oh god, that was the most stressful situation- how did I not panic? Did she find the fact that I’m able to enter his apartment weird and suspect I’m his partner? Am I supposed to be panicked or chill about it?

Shit.

As the briefing who lasted a bit more than planned came to his end, as I briefly checked my bag to see if everything was in it, my phone and badge were missing.

How did I forget them? I swore that I had taken it before leaving.

How can I even do?

I could possibly attempt a quick trip to my apartment, but that'd only be a waste of time.

I sighed as I climbed down the stairs, suddenly getting interrupted by the sound of a nearby elevator when I happened to walk in that direction before.

I...regret not thinking in advance about my words, as...people were behind me.

“Oh, hey babe- what’s...” I said as soon as she appeared, as I was coming to the realization that I had...messed up when the expressions around me changed. “...up.”

“...hey.” Y/N quietly said after noticing the look on everyone’s faces.

“Did he- is she?” Luke asked, confused.

“I- You forgot this- these.” She informed, taking the two items in her hand as she handed them to me.

‘What are we supposed to do?’ I inclined my head to the side, frowning my eyebrows.

‘I don’t know!’ She shrugged.

“Oh- are you his friend I had on the phone?” A blonde chirped, walking in.

“It’s ‘girlfriend’, apparently.” Luke corrected.

“But- So-”

“She’s my girlfriend, yeah. I didn’t tell you for..reasons, and-”

“You guys should go- We’ll talk all about this when we get back.” Y/N interrupted.

“Reid's been hiding you, and you don’t think I want to know about that?” Penelope asked.

“But- you’re working on a case, I’m not supposed to-”

“If it’s FBI shit, you’ll just put your hands over your ears and close your eyes, it’s okay.” She waved it off, pulling her aside as they went in the elevator.

“I’ll see you later Spence.”

“Okay, see you-” I said, as the door closed. “No- No questions. Not know.”

“We didn’t set anything.” JJ answered.

“...yet.” Emily continued.

“So, what happened? We didn’t see anything, I mean- I kind of suspected...sometimes but-”

“It’s...kind of long. I mean you have work and-”

“I can do two things at the same time.”

“Well uh...we didn’t know each other at first.”

“So like- it’s a fate thing or-”

“Maybe? I mean- I lost my diary at the library, I forgot it when I went to work, and he told me that he found it, didn’t want it to get lost, and so, he asked around where I could be found and, we met.”

“It sounds like cinderella.”

“...kind of. Never thought about that.”

“It really is, like- if you had never lost it, he’d just be a guy sitting with his book.”

“I wouldn’t have the courage to talk to him, because...I think I would have found him interesting.”

“You can thank your brain for making you forget about it. You got a nice boyfriend because of it- wait, I didn’t ask if you were-”

“We’re not engaged yet-”

“I’m gonna tell him to hurry as soon as I get a call with him- How did he not already propose to you?”

“It’s okay- It’s only been one year and a few months, we have-”

“Please let me plan the wedding.”

“It can wait I’m-”

“I have to plan it.”

“Okay but-”

“You’re gonna have to get used to here, you’re gonna come...quite often. Maybe with my apartment too, and Rossi’s. He organizes amazing game nights, it’s always fun.”

“...that’s why Spencer told me to prepare myself-”

“We’re not gonna let you go for a while. I bet they’re harassing him with questions right now.”

“I don’t have anything else today so- guess I’ll be staying for a bit. I’ll have to go later, though. For like- sleeping and all.”

“Will you come back tomorrow?”

“I have work...the craft shop I told you about.”

“Oh- then keep going with the story then-”

“You sure- you-”

“They’re not calling yet. Keep going.”

“Okay- so, he went to the shop…asked where he could find me, as he had something belonging to me- I was in the storage room and my coworker came saying someone had a thing that was mine, and recognized the thing as she saw me with it before. I went to the front- where he was, she left and uh...he gave it back to me. We briefly talked and, as he left I asked him his name- as he knew mine, and...he left.”

“That idiot didn’t ask for your number?”

“He could have come back, I don’t know. He knew where to find me, and...same for me. Next uh...we both had work, I suppose for him, too. And as I got a day off, I went back to the library to also thank the employee that had told him where to find me...and he came again.”

“What happened next? I need to know-”

“Uh- I think we uh...stayed there, for a while, actually. Until we were told that it’d close, and...hung out together till...almost 2AM.”

“Did you-”

“No- just talking. We barely met, we wouldn’t- We were going to go out on a date...later. I asked him first.”

“You did? Oh my god that’s so cute!”

"That was kind of stressful. You don't get to ask guys out pretty often."

"Was Reid your first boyfriend?"

"As a serious relationship, yeah. All of the others were in high school but...they were all idiots. Spencer's the first that...cares about me."

"He's always been very nice in general, I can guarantee that you'll never regret letting him enter in your life, he's gonna treat you like a princess."

"He's already gone through that, he's always supporting me, I...really feel safe, and loved, all the time."

"I'm glad everything's going well for you two. You could have come sooner, we've been asking him quite often if he'd ever present his partner as we were his parents."

"Yeah we- waited a while. We were actually planning on telling it, soon."

"Well, the 'soon' arrived."

"It was kinda…"

"Unexpected? Yeah, I know."

"It really was but...it's not as stressful as I thought. I...really like it here."

"You're gonna feel home with us, too. You're already there with our genius boy. I can tell you guys really love each other."

"We do, a lot."

"I'm glad for that. You're gonna have a lot to tell every time you come here though."

"Don't worry, I'll tell you everything there is to tell, and let you plan whatever thing there would be to celebrate. Even my wedding."

"Do I really have to wait to plan it?" Penelope asked.

"We could get married in five years, who knows. Are you gonna plan it already?"

"...probably."

"Do I get to help?"

"If you have good taste, yeah."

"It shouldn't be a problem."

"So- Oh, here they are."

"And...back to work." I said.

"Wish I didn't have to now." She sighed, answering. "You've reached the office of knowledge, what can I do for you?"

“So? How did it go with the team?”

“Chaotic. I wish I had taken a car or something instead of the jet who lasted way too long for just three hours.”

“Penelope already wants to plan our wedding here.”

“She did?”

“Yeah. If I didn’t stop her, she would have probably purchased dresses and called Rossi.”

“They also asked me about the wedding here.”

“What can I say? They’re really like a real family.”

“Yeah, they are. You’re gonna like them a lot.”

“I feel like it. Penelope already told me to get used to here because of how often she’ll call. I’m probably going to end up working here.”

“You don’t need to work here to see me, they know now. You’re cleared to come whenever you want.”

“If only you hadn’t- no, I would have probably jumped at your arms if I hadn’t seen them.”

“At least we don’t have to think about it for weeks, just to not say it at the end. It’s done.”

“Just a week ago, you said that you wanted for it to be special, it wasn’t very special to me.”

“It’s kind of...special. No one did that here.”

“Not the kind of ‘special’ you described.”

“It was a...surprising ‘kind of special’.”

“Did you just make that up?”

“I only had that in mind.”

“I thought that you were intelligent enough to just say ‘surprising’.”

“You asked which kind of special it was.”

“Unexpected would have been good too.”

“...yeah. I wanted to spice it up.”

“I’m giving a 7/10 to your spice.”

“That’s the average at least.”

“But- it was fine. I’m being a bit mean.”

“Are you mad it went like that though?”

“Not really. I know you wouldn’t have resolved yourself to say it, so...it’s said. They know, and...I really like them. You could have done it sooner, I missed out. They’re really like you described them to me.”

“Yeah, I would have waited...even more. Let’s hope you’ll get to pass by often, they’re gonna want to see you all the time. I’m pretty sure you have pre-invites to all of the parties they’ll ever organize.”

“At least we’ll be with other people and...do other stuff than staying all day at home, you know.”

“You’re right, yeah. I’ll diversify our days-off.”

“Heard Rossi knows how to cook pretty good pasta; that’ll change from our failed ones.”

“...definitely. He also makes us cook with him sometimes, but...I think I’ll pass for the ‘boil the pasta’ part.”

“Same for me. I prefer not to ruin the entire thing.”

“If he teaches us, we could get better.”

“Nah...I prefer not to. I’ll stick to the ‘make the pasta’ part.”

“It’s hard to say no to Rossi in general, good luck with that.”

“Is he like everyone’s grandpa or what?”

“Uh...I guess I’d say so. You could kind of see him as that, but I don’t know if he ever allowed anyone in the team to call him like that, except for Hotch, JJ and Matt’s kids.”

“Thanks for the warning, it’s noted.”

“He’s gonna have a bunch of nicknames for you though. He likes to do that with...pretty much everyone he knows.”

“I’m okay with that, he sounds nice from what I heard from you...and Penelope. I’m gonna stay a bit more, she wants...more information about what she doesn’t know yet about us.”

“Send me a text to confirm you’re alive, you’re gonna be staying for a while.”

“Will do, don’t worry. You might receive pictures too, she proposed and I agreed as I always like to take pictures of yours. I...also sent some of you to her, and...she might have sent them to the others.”

“They’re looking at me so...I think they got them.”

“At this point they’re gonna make a scrapbook out of it.”

“They might.”

“They don’t mean to be annoying, I’m sure. They’re just…”

“...really invested. They’re gonna want to know everything there is to say and know. Especially for you as they don’t know you as well as they know me.”

“I guess I’ll be spending my days-offs at another workplace. I’m okay with it.”

“People are gonna wonder if you’re not working there after seeing you that often, you’ll have to correct a lot of people.”

“I look smart, of course they’re gonna think I’m working there. They should have hired me by now, they’re missing out a lot.”

“You’re right, they should.”

“I can’t guarantee I’ll be with the profilers though, my talent has its limits. I can only read your face.”

“You’re only a profiler with me then.”

“Yeah, I’m a special one. I’m not risking my life doing it.”

“And not scaring people?”

“Mhm. I’m not.”

“I can tell you’re smiling without seeing you. We got a special talent in common.”

“Oh, come on, you’re the one with 187 IQ, you got the bigger talent here.”

“No, mine is smaller. You lose things all the time, that’s the real talent I don’t have.”

“I’m not doing it on purpose- And be glad I have that ‘talent’, because without it you wouldn’t even be speaking to me right now.”

“I never said it was a bad one, it’s a good one. I met you thanks to it.”

“I guess I can believe that.”

“Believe it! It’s the truth.”

"I love teasing you, I get to hear the squeaky voice.”

“Hey- no teasing about it, I always do it, I can’t help but not have another pitch, it’s like that.”

“I also have one, we’re quit. But- yours is more high-pitched to me.”

“It’s not, I always have a deep and masculine voice- please don’t tell me you’re on speaker.”

“...I’m not on speaker but...she may have- she heard it.”

“Let’s hope she won’t say it to someone else.”

“I can’t guarantee that, but...it’s not the end of the world though.”

“Yeah, it’s not. I’m sorry I...I have to go, in a bit.”

“It’s alright, we got to chat for like...five minutes, it’s a good one.”

“It is. I’ll try to call, or shoot a text if I can.”

“Okay. Love you. Go catch bad guys- and hang up first before we stay another ten minutes.”

“Got it. Love you too. Good luck with Penelope.”

“You’re still on the line.”

“I know- can you do it? I feel bad hanging up at you.”

“Fine. Have a good day-”

I wish we’d have all day to ourselves right now, it’s a bit hard to not have her with me all of a sudden.

Let’s hope I get to be home soon.

I wish I didn’t have to witness what happened there.

It...did something to me.

I didn’t know anything about her, except the same things as everyone, such as her name, personal information and their job, but...when we went there, and saw that she had already died, I felt...weird.

As if they were someone I knew, it hit way too close to home for me, as if they were the feelings I would have for y/n if anything would ever happen.

It may be weird to think about that...out of the blue, and it also may be a bit soon, or sudden but, I thought a lot about when she told me that Garcia was already planning our wedding as soon as they began talking.

It really got me thinking again, as it definitely wasn’t the first time that occured.

A lot of the people we dealt with in cases lost their lost ones suddenly, didn’t get a proper goodbye, regretted their last words before they last saw them, and...even if that’s not the case with her, I always leave, leaving her to wonder whether I’m gonna come back in one piece or at the hospital.

I’m aware of how bad I’m scaring her every time; she’s always waiting for a text to know if I’m alive to stop her from worrying, and even though I know she won’t have risks of getting hurt in most cases, I can’t stop but get scared for her, especially when I’m so far from her.

I’ve seen what happened with other loved ones in my team, and that’s not what I want to happen to her.

It’s only been...almost two years, it’s not enough at all, but...we never really talked about the future, getting married and all that stuff, we’ve been fine staying as boyfriend and girlfriend, it didn’t really matter, and we had all the time to talk about it.

So...I don’t really know if that’d be sudden.

But, at the same moment...I do want to do that; y/n means a lot to me, and that would be...mainly stressful but, it’s something that means a lot.

I want to do this, really, but...I don’t want it to be like a few days ago, it wasn’t planned, and again, I would have wanted for it to go differently.

But, after that case, and many more that happened, what if something happens before I come back? What if I get other cases, more work?

It could, and could not happen, I can’t know in advance.

That’s why I hate it when I don’t know things I actually need information about, it freaks me out.

I have no way to plan what could happen, and it’s even worse for y/n, from what I can imagine.

If something does happen, she won’t be the first to know, but due to the possible lack of calls, or anything else, she could first think of something bad, but won’t know it it’s quite bad, if nothing happened, or if she’s gonna have a call she never wished for.

I know it’s weird to think about all of that, but my job isn’t made of riskless things, I’m aware of it.

I wouldn’t be thinking about that if it was any less calm.

All that my brain can think of is that the rest of my life has to be spent with her, I can’t do it with anyone else, if she’s not there.

A simple diary made us meet each other, without it, my life wouldn’t have changed much from what I can say.

It really is fun to think that we met because of an object.

It’s quite weird to go back to when she wasn’t here, I’ve been so used to being with her.

It’s probably cliché, but I can’t imagine not having her around now that I’ve met her.

She’s sort of a part of me if I had to describe it.

She’s the reason why I look even more forward to the end of a case, going home, doing simple things as walking around the neighborhood, grocery shopping, or even getting ready for bed.

The last is the best moment of the day along with waking up having her next to me; I’m often awake first in the morning, so I get to look at her a bit more in advance before she wakes up on her own.

She always smiles first thing when she wakes up, even if she’s really tired.

That’s one of the things I prefer.

I always end up staying longer as she had trouble getting out of bed, I’d even get her out of bed by carrying her for a bit as if she was a child.

But, it makes her feel happy and loved, so, I don’t mind doing it.

When we get ready for bed, I’m usually the last to sleep as I watch her until she falls asleep.

I can’t help but do that every time, even if I’m a bit tired.

She yells at me a bit when she hears I do that instead of enjoying all of the hours I have, but, I just tell her the only excuse I had and always have.

I still haven’t found another, really.

Probably because the one I always tell her is the only that has ever existed to me, I don’t think it will change.

It probably won’t, I like that excuse.

I really don’t want anything to change, I really like the way everything is.

How she is, how she looks, when we’re together, I just can’t imagine something better.

That’s why I just...with all I’ve seen around me, what happened, of all the losses I’ve experienced, I can’t stand thinking about that ever changing, I have to tell her how I love her for the millionth time, hold her as much as I can, memorize all of the details of her face once again, and again.

I always do them more than we can recall, but...I want to do that once again, even if she tells me I’ve done these enough.

I want to express how much I love her, even if she knows it as that’s the first thing she gets to know in the morning, when we go to bed, when I leave for work, at the end of a call, or even at random moments when I look at her for a while, and end up randomly saying: “you know that I love you so bad, right?”

She smiles at it, every time.

After that, she often ends up telling me how cheesy I can be sometimes before kissing my lips and laying close to me if she wasn’t already with me.

I don’t want that to stop, I have to feel it again, think about it after it happens for hours, it can’t stop.

I also hope I won’t have to have her go through all of that fear when I leave every time.

I always feel bad about it to this day, and I know it won’t change until I decide to quit it, but...as much as she hates the risks and all of the stuff coming with it, she’ll kill me if I decide to quit, she knows how much that job is important.

So...I have to tell her, again.

I want to be able to be with her, go through whatever problem could happen, agreements we might have, I want to do all of this.

I’m willing to do all of this, no matter how tough it gets.

Y/N’s the only one I ever cared so much about, I don’t think I’ve ever done that with anyone else other than my mother.

I’m not also saying that I don’t care about my team who could pass as my own family, but, y/n’s the one.

The one that makes me feel special, that I always want to see, that pulls me through the day even if I’m having a bad case, the one that is always willing to talk even if it’s 2 in the morning, she never gave up on me, I don’t remember one moment when I wouldn’t hear about her.

I don’t want to hesitate about anything else.

I’m sure about this.

I will tell her exactly what I thought about, what I’ll think, what I thought from the beginning, whether she already knows some details by heart.

And I’ll tell her anyway for the only and one reason that it’s because I’ve always been so cheesy and hopelessly in love with her.

That is the only thing that will never change.

I don’t think I’ve even ran so fast after having to pass to the office for just some papers.

I’ve barely said goodbye to the team, and they kind of were surprised to see me rushing so bad.

They’ve probably figured out that it was because I was excited to see y/n now that they know about her, and, that is the case, but I don’t think that any of them even know what I’m about to do.

I really can’t believe it’s actually happening myself.

I’m about to do something that usually takes a while to figure out, think about, plan, and that isn’t that easy to do as it’s not something that’s to be taken lightly.

But I’m really sure, I’m aware of all of the possible reasons why I’m doing it.

I’m aware of why I’m about to marry her.

I’m not doing this as a joke, or anything else that wouldn’t make it serious.

I want to wake up knowing she’s the person I’ll be with my whole life, that I’ll be able to love even more, brag about more, think again when I’m not doing well.

I want her to know all of that.

I just can’t wait.

It’s...really crazy and sudden, and I’ve thought that it was stupid at first because of these reasons, but I don’t think it quite is.

I’m doing this for a reason, and I’ve never been so sure and confident even if that is the most stressful thing I could ever do in my life.

I just hope I won’t collapse...even if that’s a bit exaggerated to me, but, I guess it’s the whole tension, stress that’s talking.

She has no idea that I planned to do that, the only thing she knows is that I’m on my way as I told her before driving home.

If there wasn’t other vehicles, or a speed limit, I think that I would have already been there.

When I pulled out of the parking lot as no places were available nearby, I bounced my feet on the floor of the elevator all the way.

I’m kind of surprised that it didn’t crash because of that.

I’m also glad that I managed to make it to my front door, still alive.

When I took out my keys out of my pocket, missing the lock once before getting it right as I took a large breath, I already heard the sound of the bedroom door opening in a hurry when she heard the front door.

After hearing a short fumbling once I had closed the door; she had jumped in my arms as soon as I turned back to her.

The first thing that really came to mind was that she had immediately felt like home; as she always did.

She hugged me, without a word for whatever time was enough to her, until she pulled back to probably give me air.

“Welcome back. Sorry for the...sudden jump. I hope you-”

“I didn’t.” I replied, planting a short kiss on her lips. “I’ll never mind, never.”

“I know. Do you want me to uh...cook something for you? I don’t think we have much left except some eggs, I forgot to go to the store after work.”

“Don’t worry about that, I’m fine with it. I’ll help you with it so you don’t burn the apartment down. It’ll be a bit...bad to have to deal with a fire now.”

“You’re not wrong, yeah. Let’s avoid that, but- don’t criticize my possible talents! The only thing I’ll burn is the food itself. I’ll be turning the gas off as soon as I’ll see the food burning.”

“Okay- I trust you. Do you want me to let you cook on your own?”

“I like being independent, but…no, stay.”

“Alright, I’ll make sure we don’t eat burned food. We both deserve nice food after the long day we’ve had.”

“Too bad we don’t have a heart pan...you know I would have wanted to do that.”

“We’ll buy one tomorrow, don’t worry. Look, just so we don’t forget…” I took my phone from the couch, walking back next to her. “Okay, it’s on the reminder app.”

“You won’t forget it, each stuff you read stays in your memory. ‘Can’t guarantee for me.” Y/N admitted, lightly chuckling.

“You won’t forget, don’t worry. Don’t overestimate your brain.”

“I forget stuff all the time, I don’t trust him too much.”

“Don’t call yourself dumb, you’re certainly not. You’re very smart, and- you wouldn’t be even awake without your brain.”

“Oh, yeah, forgot the science thingy part. I kind of figured out that you’d be telling me that, you’re really predictable.”

“I can’t argue on that one.”

“You, not arguing? You always have an explanation that’s as long as an essay. You’re lucky that I’m interested in it.”

“I’m quite surprised that you manage to stay interested all long. Not all of the people I work with make it through the whole thing.”

“It’ll never be boring to me.”

“You sure about that? I may deliver a talk worth a four page essay.”

“Not so late, tomorrow, I promise.”

“Okay, tomorrow. Let’s cook before we get too tired.”

“Can you go first? I’m always afraid of getting burned by that.”

“I was going to do it, I was kind of afraid for you.”

“Oh- thanks, I guess.”

“Anything for you.”

Just as if I didn’t have everything planned in my head for hours, once we did the eggs, talked a bit, and layed on the bed without bothering to get rid of our outside clothes;

I still didn’t know.

I was beyond stressed.

Would it be going well?

Would she react well?

If I suddenly don’t know what to say, what do I even do next?

Of course, I was still very sure of it, more than anything, but turns out that the stress just didn’t want me to do that apparently.

I still don’t get why it had to get in the way just now.

I just have to overcome it, it’ll be...totally okay.

It’s going to be okay.

I just have to somehow get to talk and manage to know what I want to say...I guess?

“Are you okay? You didn’t say anything for a while.”

“Oh, sorry I...I was thinking about something.”

“Is it a bad or good thing?”

“It’s a good one, not bad...at all. I just don’t know if...I can say it. It’s a stressful one.”

“I’m not sleeping for a bit more, you can go ahead. If it’s stressful, I guess it must be an important thing.”

“It’s an important one, yeah.”

“Go ahead then, I’ll be listening to every word, won’t miss a bit. You got all of my attention.” Y/N said, sitting up on the side of the bed.

“Okay, okay. Um...I don’t really know where to start, and how to, but...I think I’ll be saying everything at one moment or another.” I explained, as I sat up next to her. “I’ve been thinking about it for a bit, and slightly hesitated at the beginning as I told myself that it’d be a stupid decision, but I know that it’s something I’m sure of, it’s not something I thought of for a minute before deciding that I’d be doing it. I have to say that I haven’t been thinking about it deeply since months, but the time I thought about it was enough to decide that it was what I wanted.”

“You’re starting to worry me right now...I thought it was a good thing, and- you know I freak out easily…”

“It’s definitely a good thing, I just...there’s a lot to say. It might be an essay long, I just want to say everything that’s important.”

“Okay, I’m listening. You can keep going, sorry.” She apologized, as I put my hand on hers to reassure her.

“I...I’ve had a while to think about all of this. Barely two years, but...I never really thought about it to the point of having a whole essay to say. There’s just so many things to say about how I feel about you that I can’t select which ones to put so it could be shorter. I know we’ve talked about it a lot of times, but thanks for purchasing that diary in the first place, it’s what started our story, basically. I could also thank the one that made it but...I have no idea.” I admitted, pulling a short laugh from her. “And thanks for forgetting it, too. Your forgiveness came in handy, and we’re here now. It may be all cliché and all, but that’s what changed me. A simple book, that lead me to you. I can’t thank you enough for talking to me, and not letting go.

I really thought that I was nothing but a stranger that found something for you, and that you’d end up moving on. I didn’t move on after that, you kept staying in my head. I was persuaded that you had forgotten me and that I should...leave it there. We only knew each other’s names, that didn’t mean that I could talk to you more to me. Now, I kind of want to punch my past self for that.

I turned out to be more than wrong. When I stepped in that day, I was going to find some excuse to talk to you, and pretend I didn’t see you, but I couldn’t do that. You were all I could see in that place. Pretending that I didn’t see you would have been rude.”

“You could have done it, I wouldn’t have been mad. I probably would have done the same.” She admitted.

“I couldn’t have, really. You were all I could think about, so, not looking at you after not being able to see you? That wasn’t possible. I can’t even do that now. When I look at you, I can allow myself to basically let go of whatever stresses me in my work. I know I shouldn’t be talking about it too much, but thank you for supporting me, even after all of the scares I gave you. I won’t be talking about quitting as you said that you’d kill me if I’d do it.”

“The offer is still up. I won’t let you quit until you’re at least 60.”

“I’m not planning on dying yet, I won’t quit. But, I’m sorry for all of the stress that I put you through. I wish I could make it less stressful. You’re so strong for that, I really don’t know how you manage to not have a heart attack, you’re truly amazing.

You can be proud of that though. I want you to be.

You’ve made me feel stronger because of this too. Your strength, your support, your love, all of that allows me to pull through.

I can’t imagine having to go through that without you. You became such an important part of my life, that I just...can’t imagine not having you here by my side. You matter so much to me, I really want you to know that. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I can’t do that with anyone else now that I’ve met you. You make me feel so loved, so happy, everyday, and...I want to feel like this forever. I don’t want that to change ever.”

Don’t screw this up.

You got this.

“Since I’ve met you, you’ve given me a reason to be better, to do better. Something changed when you came into my life, I’m not the doctor Reid from two years ago anymore. I would constantly overthink, I was never sure of anything, I was a mess. But now, you’ve pushed me to say what I have in mind, you’ve made me more confident, and I’ve never been sure of something my entire life. My old self wouldn’t have done that at all.

I've realized that I can't live without you anymore. I've lost too many things, and I definitely can't lose you. You're the most amazing thing that's ever happened to me. And before you say anything, not even books, TV shows, or whatever else is better. You're the one that I love the most, and that I'll also love for many and many years.

I've...also realized that I've said the entirety of a monologue, and you're probably wondering what that was for so, I'll get to the point." I explained, briefly leaving her side to take something from my pocket, a gasp leaving her lips as I suddenly put a knee on the floor, pulling the box open.

"It would be an immeasurable pleasure to be able to share my life with you, as long as we both shall live. So...I, Spencer Reid, would like to know if the wonderful woman in front of my eyes would accord me the pleasure of marrying me?"

"Of course I will, you idiot!" Y/N exclaimed, pressing her lips against mine.

"Is that a yes though?" I asked, still against her lips.

"It's a yes." She answered, as we both pulled back from the other when I took her left hand, slightly struggling to take the ring out of the box.

After a few seconds, and a few laughs, I nervously slid the ring on her finger, looking at her when I was done.

"...I understand the stress you had now. I...I really don't have the words right now. I kind of feel bad about not having anything to say. I just...want you to know that I also love you, so much. Thank you for being here with me, and...marrying me. This is...the best thing, ever." She said, her eyes watering.

"I would marry you every day if it was possible."

"If only. We have to plan a whole wedding now. I think we're gonna need a lot of help."

"That depends when you want it to happen."

"That also depends how fast it can be organized. Because if it can be done in one week, that would be...amazing. I can't wait another year."

"It's as it was already done babe. I bet Penelope already planned everything from the moment she met you."

"I wouldn't be surprised. Gosh, I can't wait to be able to call you my husband." She admitted.

"And I can't wait to be able to call you my wife."

"Can you...frickin' believe that? We met her just a bit ago, and like...one month after I get to organize their wedding? This is totally crazy. She even let me help choose her dress, her damn dress!"

"Of course she'd let you help Penelope. She couldn't have even said no to you, and as she didn't say no, she asked for your help as none of them knew how to do all this." Luke answered.

"I could literally drop out of the FBI and become a wedding planner at this point. Don't yell at me in calls, because you know what I'm gonna do next."

"We won't, don't worry about it. Just enjoy the wedding, you literally help plan the best day of their lives, they're not gonna be doing that every day." He reassured.

"That's too bad that it's only gonna last for a day. It's a shame we'll have to take everything down though."

"Just enjoy. Calm down for a bit."

Penelope took a deep breath, tapping Luke’s shoulder as she began leaving, but stopped for a second. "I'm gonna see if she's even ready. Someone go check on the boy wonder."

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Y/N? Can I enter? It’s Pen.” Garcia asked, knocking a few times.

“As long as you’re not Spencer with a voice changer or something, yeah.” I said, as the lock of the door made itself heard signaling that the door was open, before she closed it on her way in.

“I thought you weren’t ready yet! Spencer’s gonna be downstairs soon.”

“I’m ready physically, not mentally. This is the part when I stress down.”

“What are you stressed about? Here, sit for a bit.” She motioned, putting her hand on mine when we had sat down.

“I don’t know...I, it’s the whole wedding thing. It’s not about Spencer or anything, I do still want to marry him, but...I’m just stressing about it. It didn’t hit me until today.”

“I get it. Lots of people, the big event, and mostly, marrying someone who matters. Don’t tell me one of your worries is that he’s not gonna find you beautiful or regret. There’s no way. Because, I know...we weren’t supposed to send messages to the boys before today, but, he spoke about you practically all night. He couldn’t believe that it was happening, I mean- who wouldn’t be stressed about marrying such a beautiful girl? So, stop that. All of the people here are only friends you know and family. There’s nothing else to stress about, I listed everything, and none of them is something you should overstress about, it’s going to be okay.”

“I know, I...I just stressed all of a sudden. And, I know he doesn’t think that, I just had the stress bringing all of those...stressful thoughts. Am I the only one who stresses at their wedding or is it normal? I don’t want to ruin anything because I’ll end up stressing, not knowing what to say-”

“You will be okay. You’ll know what to say the minute you’ll see him. Come here-” She rushed forward, taking my hand to put me on my feet as she directed me in front of the mirror. “Do you think Spencer isn’t stressed too when he thinks that he’s gonna marry you? You’re beautiful, amazing, strong, extremely kind, dedicated, I mean- he’s so lucky to have you. Anyone else would be stressed, it’s normal, you don’t have to think that you’re ruining anything, at all. Because that’s all I see when I look at that mirror. There’s not enough adjectives to describe your beauty right now, I think we’re gonna have to invent new ones at this point. I mean- look at you!” She exclaims, putting her head on my shoulder as she smiles.

“I’m probably also stressed because of how handsome he is too. I mean…wow. I’m marrying Spencer fucking Reid. It’s not anyone, he’s a literal god and a total genius.”

“And he is going to marry y/n fucking y/l/n. You’re not anyone as well, you’re a smokin’ hot bomb, a goddess and a strong, independent woman.”

“Okay, I am smokin’ hot.”

“Bet you are. So, now that everything is okay, you wait here. Don’t worry, Hotch’s gonna come soon, he’s probably finishing off a talk with our boy wonder. I’ll see you in a bit!” Penelope hurried out, leaving the room.

I’m marrying...fucking Spencer Reid.

Someone pinch me. I feel like this is a dream.

Ow- it’s not one.

It’s...really happening.

“I now declare you husband, and wife. You can kiss your wife, kid.” Rossi announces, as I advanced towards y/n, covering both sides of her face with my hands as the embrace deepens afterwards.

Soon enough, whoops and hollers echo through the backyard, as we pull back with smiles on both on our faces, maintaining our gaze on the other.

It’s official.

We’re finally both able to call the other our spouse, from now on, and forever.

Just two years ago, I never would have thought that this would happen.

I was just Spencer Reid, a guy that would always overthink, think he wasn’t good enough for anyone, didn’t think about ever going on dates, I was a total mess...until that diary.

It’s a bit ridiculous to say that I’ve overcome what would have refrained me from ever being with someone thanks to an object, but...that’s really what happened.

Who in the hell would have even thought that a person that I barely knew with only a few words would slowly become a familiar person, then a friend, a partner, and as I totally didn’t expect...my wife.

It all seems unreal, even now.

But it really is, believe it or not. I heard the words well, slid her ring on her hand; after that, she slid my ring on mine, Rossi announced it...and we kissed.

I pinched myself while she wasn’t looking, and it still wasn’t a dream.

I was married to her.

Even when we talked to our friends, we never let go of the other.

We were probably afraid that one of us was going to disappear if we ever let go of their hand.

I have no idea if some found it weird, I didn’t even care.

I was with her, she was with me, and we were both married.

That’s the only thing that mattered.

And...now that I think about what sealed our fates and lives forever as I looked at y/n;

It’s a good thing that I paid attention to my surroundings that day.

Let me know if you liked this fic here!

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