#sure many of the writers were writing him as queer intentionally | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ravs6709 · 3 years

Text

Our Very Own Story- Queerplatonic Fedex

Alternate title: I project so much onto Fitz that he's probably ooc

Woo, I'm finally done! I've had this idea for so many months, but I never had the chance to actually finish it, but finally, it's here (in all its 7.3k words glory)

This story takes place in the same au as Our Very Own Melody, which is the (romantic) Kam side. OVOM isn't necessary to read to read this one, but it's still my fave work, so read it anyways

But here's a refresher. Soulmates au in high school. Soulmate bond is having a strong bond similar to telepathy and empathy combined, and can only be revealed once the soulmates are close with each other.

Ve/vem Dex and she/ae Biana because yes.

And also, Fitz, Keefe, Tam and Linh are in the same grade, and are all one year older than Sophie, Biana and Dex.

Warnings: censored swearing, and mentions of (a character from a play's) death

Hope you enjoy!

•~•~•~•~•~•

Fitz remembered the days that he played the piano. He still played it in the present, but not to the extent that he had in the past. He used to constantly play it, something that he was partially forced to do.

It wasn't like he didn't enjoy it, because he did. He'd started at a young age, and as he grew older, he found himself creating parts to songs. Just a few notes, maybe long enough for a verse, he didn't have the same passion to create music like Keefe would using his violin.

If anything, he preferred to write lyrics. He liked being able to tell stories with words. It was at the end of elementary school where he'd realized that it wasn't writing music that interested, but writing in general. He had so many ideas flowing inside of him, and a powerful imagination.

When middle school came, he started to explore some of the possibilities. He tried poetry, but while it was fun, it wasn't his thing. He particularly enjoyed writing short stories for English class. He didn't spend that much time focusing on writing though, he spent most of his free time hanging out with Keefe, Biana, Sophie, and rarely, Dex.

It was in eighth grade when Biana practically forced him to watch the school play with her and Sophie. (Keefe, for some reason, had been allowed to decline the invitation. That alone made Biana's intentions suspicious).

From start to finish, he was amazed by what he saw. The play was one that he'd heard of, but didn't know the plot to. Each movement of the actor was a sentence in his head, he could see the words written down on paper, ready to be acted out. He knew that script writing wasn't as simple as that, the formatting was different, but still he was curious.

After the play was over, the three of them started walking to take Sophie home. "So, did you like it?" Biana asked.

"It was good," Fitz replied. "The lighting was really great."

That was another thing that made script writing different compared to writing a short story. When writing something to be acted out, you had to be able to imagine the scene, know what kind of lighting would be needed and what special effects were needed in order to emphasize something, or in order to make something happen.

"It was great!" Sophie agreed. "Dex did a really good job behind the scenes!"

"Wait, Dex was involved with the play?" Fitz asked.

He'd met Dex back in elementary school, but they never actually spoke to each other until a few months ago, when Sophie befriended them. But even now, even though they'd hang out at his house, he hadn't really interacted with Dex that often. (It did explain why Dex wasn't with them either).

"You didn't know?" Biana asked. "I mean, ve hasn't talked about it much, but surely you should've known. Vis knowledge of technology is really good."

Fitz hadn't actually witnessed it for himself, but had heard about it. But the stories couldn't do it justice.

•~•~•~•~•~•

After Sophie had gone home, the two siblings started to walk to their home.

"So, what about playwriting?" Biana asked.

"I know you brought me to see it for a reason," he told her.

She crossed her arms. "Do I have to have a reason?"

"Knowing you, yeah."

Ae huffed. "Rude. What would I even have to gain from introducing you to a form of writing that you might enjoy?"

"Oh, I don't know, like asking for a favour such as doing half of a project?" He was still a little bit bitter for having to do that.

"That was one time!"

"One time too many!"

•~•~•~•~•~•

Fitz was glad that his high school had a talented drama club. Every year, his school participated in the city-wide festival. The thought alone was exciting, and he knew that unlike in middle school, it was the students who wrote the plays. He wanted to be part of it.

It also sounded a little stressful, because it was no longer just a school play, but a piece of art meant to represent the school. Actual professionals would be there to judge the play. And this was going to be his first time doing this. He knew though, that it was going to be fine. He wasn't alone, there was going to be a whole playwriting team to create the play.

Unfortunately, luck decided not to favour him. While there were multiple teachers in the drama department, it was the head who would deal with everything. Except the head of the drama department had gone on maternity leave, meaning that the school wasn't going to participate in the festival for that year. While it would be rude to be annoyed at the teacher, he was still a little upset, because he'd been looking forward to it.

The year itself wasn't bad, he enjoyed it a lot. He'd managed to get most of his classes with Keefe, the only differing one being their art course, where Keefe went with music, and he chose drama. His classes were entertaining. Sophie and Biana had started dating, and the hangouts at his house only grew more frequent.

There were also the Song twins. He wasn't necessarily friends with Linh, but they shared a few classes, and she was fun to be around. Sometimes they ate lunches together when Keefe wasn't around. Tam, on the other hand, he knew nearly nothing about, other than the fact that he usually kept to himself. Or at least, until Keefe had managed to start a rivalry with him, and then they started serenading each other with their violins. Their rivalry was a big source of entertainment, and he and Linh would often discuss the fact that they clearly liked each other.

All of those things definitely made his first year of high school a good one.

•~•~•~•~•~•

Even without the fact that the head of the drama teacher had returned from maternity leave, his second year of high school was eventful. Biana, Sophie and Dex had joined them, meaning that he got to see them more often.

He walked into the drama club room to get his form to join the drama club. He was surprised to see that Dex was also in the room.

"Hey Dex," he greeted. "Didn't expect to see you here."

"I normally do backstage stuff, did you forget, Wonderboy?" ve asked.

"Oh yeah, that's right."

He was reminded of when Sophie had told him that Dex was part of the backstage crew during middle school. He made a mental reminder to not forget, because while he hadn't intentionally been rude, he had been rude to vem in the past. He wanted to be a better friend than that.

"But actually," ve continued. "I wasn't actually going to be a part of backstage this year, I was thinking of being an actor."

"You like acting?"

Fitz was pretty sure that Dex had never mentioned being an actual actor before, but if he had to be honest, he wouldn't have been surprised if ve had. He'd already forgotten about vis involvement with the drama club.

But to his surprise, Dex flushed red, one of vis hands moving to scratch the back of vis neck. "It's not something I've brought up. I kinda have stage fright, so I'm trying to face that fear and do something that I want. Even if I get a minor role, I'll be happy."

"You should go for it!" Fitz told vem. "I'm sure you'll do good on the stage!"

Ve smiled sheepishly. "Thank you."

•~•~•~•~•~•

Along with him, there were four other people who signed up to be a playwright. He'd only recognized one of them, since they'd been in the same class the previous year, but he wasn't friends with any of them. They were nice people though, they were quite calm, compared to his friends. (Keefe, Biana and Sophie made a dangerous combination).

Playwriting was interesting, because it was different compared to what he was used to. He was aware that it wouldn't be the same, but he wasn't expecting how different they would feel. There was little focus on description, and there was no flowery prose at all. The descriptions that were there were short and simple, just enough for the actor and backstage crew to know what was going on.

It was a little hard getting used to the formatting, because he had to remember to capitalize the names, and there were a lot of small details that he needed to remember. But it was okay, because he had the other writers with him.

•~•~•~•~•~•

"So," Dex said. "How's the play going?"

"We're mostly done with the script, but we've been told the script is too short, so we're just adding on to it." This was one of the few times that ve had been the one to approach him, and he had a feeling that he'd be interacting with vem more often. "We've decided on a subversion of the classic high school story, you know what I'm talking about, right?"

Ve scrunched vis nose. "New girl goes to high school, befriends two popular guys- but sometimes one of them is a childhood friend- and gets into a love triangle with said guys? Plus, there's probably a mean girl? How could I not know? What changes have you made?"

"The mean one isn't actually that mean, and fae gets together with the main character."

"Ooh, do the two popular guys get together?" ve asked.

"One of them is enby, but yeah. The writers have been having so much fun making everything queer."

"Holy sh*t, that does sound like fun! Last year me would have killed to see something like that, when I was questioning myself."

Fitz had been starting to come to terms with the fact that he was aromantic, but he could definitely see where ve was coming from. Even if there weren't any confirmed characters on the aspec spectrum, he was always happy to have characters who were queer.

•~•~•~•~•~•

"Crapcrapcrap," Dex muttered under vis breath, pacing back and forth as ve waited for Fitz to get his lunch out of his locker.

Fitz took out his lunch, then closed the locker. He turned towards vem. "Try to breathe," he suggested. "If you get too panicked now, that's when the mistakes are going to happen. Do you want to take a minute to sit down and breathe?"

Ve glanced back and forth between him and the staircase they'd need to climb to head to the club room. Reluctantly, they sat down.

"It's not like they won't start without you there, right?" Ve asked.

"It's not like you'll be late. What do you normally do to calm yourself? Do you want me to hold your hand? I know Keefe likes that."

For a moment, he wondered if he was overstepping some kind of boundary- because they still weren't that close- but ve smiled sheepishly, and looked down at the floor. "Maybe… that would be nice. We can try that."

Ve gently held his hand, and Fitz noticed that his hand was warm, compared to his own cold one. They sat like that for a few moments, until vis shaky hand became more stable.

"Okay," ve said, but it came out as a breathy whisper. "I think we should get going."

Ve let go of his hand, the warmth slowly fading away. He liked the feeling of holding vis hand.

They went to the club room, where the auditions were being held. Dozens of students were trying out for the various roles, and he felt a little proud, knowing that people wanted to act for a play that he helped to write.

He watched the students try out, and they were all so impressive. He was glad that he wasn't actually part of the group that decided who was casted and who wasn't. He may have been a writer, but the writers weren't in charge of the auditions.

Soon it was Dex's turn- ve was auditioning for one of the teachers in the story. The teacher that ve was auditioning for was someone lenient, a good friend to the other students. The teacher would often jokingly tease the students in the class.

Seeing Dex on the stage, it was almost as ve had become a new person. He knew that obviously, being able to act in a variety of roles was what an actor was supposed to do, but it was like seeing a side to vem that he'd never seen before.

Everything, from the tone of vis voice, to the grin on vis face, to the very slight change in posture was better than he could have ever imagined.

Fitz was sure that if ve had gone for a lead role, ve would be able to steal the show.

•~•~•~•~•~•

"Dex, that was amazing!" He told vem, after ve had finished the audition.

"You… you think so?" Ve murmured, looking a little flustered. (Wait, flustered?)

"Yeah! You were great up there!" He replied, choosing to ignore what vem being flustered could mean.

"It- it was only the audition."

"You'll be getting more practice, it's like…" he paused, trying to find the words. "A preview. If the preview is good, the full thing will also be great."

"If you say so."

"I know you'll do great."

•~•~•~•~•~•

Dex had managed to be casted in the role, and both Fitz and Dex were happy. Dex had to practice vis lines, so Fitz offered to be there to listen. At first, ve seemed hesitant, out of the fear of looking bad, but eventually they accepted the offer.

At first, it was a little awkward. Dex seemed to have difficulties making eye contact with him, and when ve did, ve would seem to lose concentration on what ve was saying. It wasn't just a lesser version of stage fright, because it started to extend to their normal conversations too.

(He was starting to have suspicions, but he hoped it wasn't the case. He didn't want to have to think about that.)

But slowly, ve became more comfortable talking to him. The confidence that had been evident during the audition started to return. Once again, Fitz was in awe.

•~•~•~•~•~•

"These plays are so good," Dex murmured.

Fitz nodded in agreement. At the festival, various schools presented their plays. Each of them were different- one was fantasy, with kingdoms and people trying to survive, another depicted a local issue, and another about what it means to be a family. They were all about different topics, but each of them were spectacular.

"What if ours isn't as good?" Ve whispered.

"We've worked hard on it," he answered. "We'll make sure it's good."

He offered his hand to vem, something that he started doing often after the first time. Ve took it, and they sat on the seats holding hands until it was time for their school to set up everything.

"I have faith in you, okay?" Fitz whispered as ve stood up.

"Thank you." Ve smiled, then left with the other actors.

Fitz looked back towards the stage so he could enjoy the show. Since he wasn't an actor, he didn't have to get up. The play began, and even though he'd seen it multiple times, it still looked impressive. The jokes didn't fail to make him smile.

After it was all over, ve sat back down next to him.

"You did great up there," he told vem.

Ve smiled at him, vis face shining with joy. (Part of him wanted to just smile back, the other part wanted to back away, because of all of these feelings. Instead, he shoved the conflicting feelings away, he could think about them another day.)

•~•~•~•~•~•

It turned out that he didn't get the chance to think about his feelings another day. The two of them lived nearby, so after they were brought back to the school, they decided to walk together.

"Hey Fitz, can I tell you something?" Ve asked.

"Sure, go ahead."

Ve stopped walking, then turned to face him. "I have a crush on you. I've had one since last year."

Despite the fact that he suspected this, he was still shocked. "What?"

"I don't expect you to return my feelings, but I thought… after the play, I finally have the confidence to tell you."

"Since…" he murmured. "Since how long?"

"Since last year," ve replied. "In the beginning, I honestly hated you. I thought you were a spoiled jerk, but I learned that you aren't that, and then my crush happened."

"Oh," he breathed, feeling a little overwhelmed. "I'm sorry, I don't feel the same way."

"It's okay, I just wanted to get it out," ve said, but he could see vis disappointment. "Oh, my house is that way, bye. Good night."

Fitz watched as ve walked down a different path, and he knew that they didn't have to part ways until another few minutes. He felt something like dread build up within him, and he couldn't help but think that he messed up.

•~•~•~•~•~•

After the confession, Dex started to keep vis distance, and Fitz hated it. He liked hanging out with vem, it was nice and comforting. It was like how they were in the beginning of the year, before they finally interacted with each other.

Whenever they had their group hangouts, Sophie, Keefe, Biana and Linh would sit in between them. The distance between them wasn't that huge, but he felt like it was just going to grow more.

It also didn't help that he didn't know how he was feeling. He thought that he had it figured out, he didn't have any romantic feelings towards vem. But every once in a while, he caught himself staring. Dex had seen him do it more than one time, and ve would be the first to look away, looking a little upset.

It would hurt, wouldn't it. I rejected you, and now I'm staring at you. I wish I had an answer for you.

However, he didn't, so he kept quiet and continued to stare longingly.

•~•~•~•~•~•

"Okay, what's going on?" Biana asked, slamming his bedroom door open before slamming it shut again.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, hoping that ae wasn't referring to what he thought ae was about to say. "And careful with the door," he added, hoping to get aer off topic.

"Hah, nice try with that, but I'm referring to you and Dex," She replied.

He flinched. Damn it, she's too perceptive. And now she'll definitely know! Well, guess I've got no choice but to tell her.

"We haven't been dating," he explained. "I'm just… ve confessed to me and I'm so confused. I thought… I thought I was aromantic, but all of a sudden I just can't help but look at vem." He sighed, then ran a hand through his hair. "Ve's avoiding me because I rejected vem, except I don't know what my feelings for vem are anymore."

Ae sat down on the bed next to him. "Okay, first off, if you're aromantic, that's great. If you're not, then that's fine too. I can't tell you what you feel, but I can sympathize. Do you remember at the end of elementary and during the beginning of middle school, I kept clinging onto Keefe?"

He nodded.

"Well, I thought I had a crush on him."

"Wait, really?" That was something he didn't know.

"I know better now, I was just admiring someone who I thought was cool and was also pretty. That sounds like a crush to you, doesn't it?"

He nodded slowly.

"Well, it wasn't," she stated. "There's more to a crush than just thinking someone is pretty, otherwise, I'd be crushing on half the school. There's this… feeling inside of you, you feel warm and fuzzy. You find yourself wanting to be with them often, you want to go outside and explore the world with them. You might want to be closer with them than anyone else. That's how I've felt."

He considered that, then tried to compare it to what he'd been feeling.

"It's… similar, I think," he explained. "I like being with vem, and I regret choosing to ignore vem at first. I wish that we could've grown closer before." He closed his eyes, and pictured vem, sitting next to him, their hands linked.

He felt warmth, before it faded into confusion. Biana's explanation seemed right, but he felt like there was something that he was missing.

•~•~•~•~•~•

Since it was summer vacation, it meant that Fitz didn't have to go to school every day and see Dex. While they had hangouts often, Dex often had to babysit vis younger siblings, so he didn't see vem too often.

It was probably a good thing, it meant that he could try and figure out his feelings, without the source of said feelings being around to make everything complicated. (Though, it wasn't really working). At least though, he could figure out how to make things less awkward, because the others were starting to notice something was going on, and he didn't want to be the reason that the atmosphere wasn't pleasant.

He spent a lot of his free time playing the piano. He'd been doing less of it lately, but once he'd started playing not as an obligation, but because he wanted to, he found that playing it was a good stress reliever. He could immerse himself in the light sounds of the piano, distract himself from all the confusion he felt.

Sometimes though, when he played the piano, he thought of the songs that he often heard- whether from school or just Biana- and murmured the lyrics. He tried playing the songs that he knew were about romance, because maybe he could figure out how he felt about the experiences that other people had.

He was still conflicted though. Some songs it seemed like the person was oddly possessive over the one that they loved, the feeling of love so strong and intense and suffocating. Whatever he felt towards Dex was strong, but not like that. Other songs were a lot more casual, talking about how the warmth that came from being with the one you loved.

He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. He really hoped he could find an answer, and soon.

•~•~•~•~•~•

While he had no answer, interactions with Dex did become easier. He wasn't sure if it was because he was getting used to what he was feeling, was coming closer to figuring it out, or he was just getting better at suppressing his feelings.

The next year of school had started, and it meant a new play for the drama club. Both him and Dex joined the club, just like the previous year.

Most of the other playwrights were people he was familiar with from the previous year, but there was a new face. This year, they agreed on something less realistic- superheroes. It was interesting to see how the story evolved, from a joke about the main character "Grey" being morally grey, to adding two antagonists with strong superpowers, which then ended up focusing less on the main character, but more between the relationship between two siblings. It was absolutely incredible to see what they were able to come up with.

Coming up with a plot was only the beginning though, but this time, he had more experience writing, so he was able to contribute even more to the story.

Writing the dialogue could be difficult sometimes, as some of the lines felt too dramatic, or not emotional enough. He tried saying them out loud, but he wasn't that good at voice acting, so he sounded too robotic for his liking.

"It sounds like you're writing something for the play," Dex said during one lunch. "Do you want me to say it out loud for you?"

Fitz was surprised by the offer. Whole they were talking more, it was usually in a group. So for Dex to be coming to him, it meant that their friendship could be better.

"That would be nice, thank you. I'm trying to write a monologue about the mayor, addressing the people about how his sister betrayed him and has been working for the rebels. But right before that, it's his reaction to the betrayal."

"Is he angry, or more sad?"

"Bit of both, and then when he makes his speech to the audience he reveals an invention that'd be used to stop the rebels, so while he's calm, he should also sound vaguely menacing."

"Is the mayor the villain?"

"It's complicated. The mayor's sibling has superpowers, while he doesn't. He fears that the powers are going to cause him to lose his status, so he creates laws that impact people with powers. Those people then rebel so they can have proper rights, sometimes violently, which to the mayor, proves that people with powers are a threat. The mayor also has been looking into an invention that can get rid of powers, because he wants to "cure" his sibling."

"He does awful things for the sake of love," Dex guessed.

"Exactly. Oh, here"--he turned his phone screen so ve could see the screen--"the script is here for you to read."

Ve started off murmuring, trying to get a feel for the scene. As ve re-read the scene over and over again, ve spoke louder, emotion seeping into vis tone.

"Thank you Dex," he said, after it was over. "That helped a lot.

"No problem. It was fun."

The bell rang, signaling the end of the lunch period.

"I've got to head to class now, see you later!" Without thinking, Fitz leaned towards vem, before he realized what he was doing.

Was I about to kiss vem on the cheek?

He couldn't tell if it was just instinct- he always kissed his mom on the cheek if either of them had to go somewhere- or if he genuinely wanted to show affection like that.

He abruptly turned away and quickly left, not daring to look back and see if ve had noticed or not.

•~•~•~•~•~•

It turned out that Dex hadn't noticed the almost-cheek-kiss, and Fitz was relieved. But it did get him thinking. If he and Dex were to date, would he be comfortable with kissing vem on the lips? He knew that for the most part, kissing was common in romantic relationships. After a few moments of thinking, he decided that he didn't want that.

It wasn't like a switch had been flipped (he knew that kissing wasn't required in romantic relationships), he did finally begin to have his answer.

His hangouts with Dex slowly began to go back to normal, as they fell back into the dynamic from before the confession. Except this time, there was less blushing and being embarrassed, because this time, there wasn't a crush to hide.

Sometimes Dex acted out the scenes he helped write. They didn't do that too often though, since Dex was going to audition, and ve didn't want to have any sort of advantage.

It felt nice to be with Dex, it was comforting and fun. When he tried imagining Dex dating someone, he found that he didn't mind that too much, as long as they'd be able to hang out together (he was annoyed by the fact that he hadn't tried to imagine that earlier).

•~•~•~•~•~•

"Hey, Dex," Fitz called out. "About the confession…" Despite having his answer, he was a little nervous, because neither of them had actually ever discussed the confession or the aftermath.

Dex blinked, then pursed vis lips. "What about it?"

"I know I did already reject you, but well, you know about the stuff after… I was confused. Because I like being with you, and I'll admit, you look beautiful, but I'd been unable to actually figure out if it was romantic attraction or not. It wasn't, so here's my official rejection. Hope it doesn't change anything between us again."

There was a pause, then ve snorted. "You do know that you already rejected me, right? I mean, I get what you're saying, but I've been working to get over you. Hasn't quite worked yet, but I'm not devastated or anything."

"That's good, I feel better about this."

"Your explanation also makes sense, I mean, it took me forever to realize that I don't like girls. Attraction is confusing."

Fitz laughed. "You can say that again. I'm aromantic, but I think part of the confusion is that I like the idea of romance."

"So when you have someone confess to you," ve continued. "You're wondering if you should have accepted the confession."

He nodded. "Exactly."

"And we'll continue to stay as friends, right?"

"Yeah, that sounds like a good plan."

He could always figure out more of the details later.

•~•~•~•~•~•

With everything settled, Fitz and Dex grew closer. Auditions for the play drew near, and the actors were instructed to think about who they were going to be playing.

"I kinda want to play the mayor?" Dex said. "I mean, I've seen very small bits of the dialogue from other characters, but I did have fun doing that monologue the first time."

"You should do it then," Fitz told vem.

"Yeah but… it's a more major role, and I'm scared of messing it up. I haven't really had much experience in the main cast, let alone as an antagonist."

"I'm sure you could do it," Fitz said, putting his hands on vis shoulders. "Your acting helped me, and I'm proud of how far you've come. Worst case scenario, you don't get the role, but you know how nice our teacher is."

"She is nice," ve agreed.

"So you know she won't be harsh."

"I guess, yeah."

•~•~•~•~•~•

The scene that had been used for the audition wasn't one that Dex had read, which made Fitz feel a little bit better, because the last thing that he wanted was for vem to make it because of an unfair advantage. He knew that ve'd feel guilty about it.

The scene was when the mayor's sister left to secretly join one of the rebel meetings, and then he talked to himself about how much he hated the rebels and how he was going to make sure that his citizens would be protected from those who had superpowers.

The edge in Dex's tone was similar to how Fitz had imagined the mayor to sound like- sweet, but it was clear that the mayor was menacing. The reasoning was somewhat noble, to protect the citizens, but what wasn't considered was that people with superpowers were human too. The mayor was the one who ended up causing damage, while trying to stop the damage from happening.

He thought about the ending, and wondered how it would look like for Dex (or another actor) to perform during the end, when everything that the mayor had done led to the deaths of his sister and his friend (well technically, the friend actually lived, but at the time, he didn't know that). The mayor would go through a revelation that everything he was doing was wrong, and he needed to fix everything.

The actors who were auditioning all seemed capable of performing the role well, and Fitz wondered who would make it.

•~•~•~•~•~•

Dex managed to get the role of the mayor, and just like the previous year, Dex often practiced in front of him. Without the fear of crushes, it meant that ve was significantly more comfortable, and ve was able to do a better job.

There were points when ve got nervous, but Fitz was there to help encourage them. And despite the fact that he'd done this before, he watched vem practice in awe, because he still couldn't believe that he was able to watch this, watch someone put so much passion into acting out something he helped to write.

It felt like all of these emotions were contagious, because sometimes, it almost felt like he could feel Dex's own emotions. When ve did the monologue about being betrayed, he could feel that heartbreak and anger.

Or if Fitz was in a good mood, it spread to Dex, vis voice would sound just a little bit lighter, and during their group hangouts, ve'd talk a little bit more than usual.

The opposite applied too- sometimes Dex came to school, angry at vis siblings. While Fitz wouldn't feel irritated, necessarily, but he did find himself needing a little more quiet.

Fitz wondered if that was just them being in tune with each other, or if it was the work of something more. (In his first year, he'd joined the strings ensemble to play the piano part, and had witnessed Keefe and Tam's rivalry, but nobody could deny that when it was time to be serious, they played really well. While neither of them had found their soulmate, he wouldn't be surprised if they were.)

No matter what it was though, he knew that he was glad that he made the decision to befriend Dex.

•~•~•~•~•~•

During some of their free time, Fitz and Dex would hang out in his room and watch tv. Ever since all of this, he found himself focusing more on the writing when it came to the shows.

Sometimes what they watched was simple, others weren't. Some were cartoons, and some were play adaptations to some of the shows he'd watched before.

"Do you ever think about what you'll be doing in the future?" Fitz asked.

Dex nodded. "Yeah. It's hard to imagine it, though. Is there anything you want to do in the future?"

Fitz laid down against the bed they were sitting on. "I don't know, really. I mean, I think writing would be fun. If I got to write a play adaptation to a TV show I liked, I'd be really happy with that."

Ve hummed, laying down next to him. "You can try going for it. I think you'd do well. I know you didn't write the entirety of the plays, but they were fun to act out."

"Maybe. I guess we'll see. What about you?"

"I think voice acting would be fun. I could do stuff for animation, it seems less stressful than doing something live action. Then again, I don't really know yet."

"I think you'd do a good job," he said, before he linked their fingers together.

•~•~•~•~•~•

"I feel so weird," Dex said.

"Can you describe it?"

"I feel anxious, we're presenting the play in just a few hours, but part of me doesn't feel that scared, and that just makes me more worried."

"The dress rehearsal and the one we presented at school were great," he assured. "Don't you remember the applause?"

"That's different. I know we've done this before, but like, we only won one award last year when there were a crap ton of them. I don't want to be the reason why we don't advance in the competition this year either."

"We'll do our best, okay? You can do that much, right?" He asked, gently grabbing one of vis hands.

Ve nodded, determination flashing in vis eyes. "Okay, we'll do our best."

•~•~•~•~•~•

Their play began, and it was going incredibly well- it felt like everyone was performing even better than usual. While he really liked the comedic play from the previous year, the lighting, special effects, and the emotional speeches made the play feel better in terms of quality.

It neared the end- when the mayor was about to learn that his friend was alive. But as Dex spoke, Fitz noticed that something was off. Ve performed fine, but one of vis lines was slightly wrong. Ve must have noticed, because as ve crouched down, ve froze, vis eyes darting side to side. Ve picked up the hand of the "dead body", vis breaths visible.

From far away, it could have been interpreted as disbelief, that maybe the character was noticing something. But Fitz knew that wasn't the case, and even he began to feel nervous.

Ve had started to panic a lot less with all the practice, but that didn't mean that vis stage fright didn't disappear.

Dex, I know you can do it. I believe in you. Just get through this ending, and it'll be over. You can do it.

That nervous feeling that he'd felt disappeared in an instant. For a few moments, he felt nothing. Then there was shock, so overwhelming that for a moment, he couldn't breathe.

Dex spoke, vis lines delivered without any stutter, and there was so much happiness in vis tone, more than Fitz had heard in a while. There was that breathless sort of relief, which mainly came from receiving good news after a long time. There was no way that it could be faked so easily. Especially not when ve had been panicking just moments ago.

Fitz smiled at vem, those same emotions that Dex was feeling could be felt by him too. He had no idea what was going on, but whatever it was, Fitz was glad that it had happened.

When ve walked off stage after the last few scenes were over, he heard a voice in his mind.

Wonderboy, did you know that we're soulmates?

It was Dex's voice, but ve was nowhere near hi-

He caught on to that last word. Soulmates. Soulmates. That word repeated in his brain.

Yeah, soulmates. It shocked me, but not so much the soulmates part but more the "your voice is in my brain" part. How do you feel about all of this?

Despite being a writer, he had no words to explain how he felt. He was elated, happy, but none of those words felt like it did justice.

Okay, I think I can tell. Just know that I'm happy you're my soulmate too. Also, you might wanna get up on stage to bow, we can talk later.

Fitz stood up quickly, not realizing that the others were getting up. Yeah, we'll do that.

The festival itself wasn't that long, and their school was one of the later schools to present, but still, it felt like such a long time away. He had to actively concentrate on the other plays, otherwise he was going to get lost in thought, or end up spending the entire time mentally communicating with Dex.

Finally though, it ended, and once they were dropped back at school, they started their walk home together.

"Are you shocked that we're soulmates?" Dex asked.

"Not really. You and I have gotten really close over these two years, I don't think I can imagine my soulmate being anyone else," he replied. "Though I do still think that part of me is processing."

Ve snorted. "That reveal literally snapped me out of my spiraling. If you think you had no time to process it, imagine being on stage and there's just a voice. I'm lucky I didn't jump in shock, and managed to get through the rest of that."

"Oh, yeah, that would be something that would scare me. But I think we should talk about what comes next."

"We already decided that we aren't gonna date," Dex told him.

He nodded. "And I've thought about this for a while, but I do want to stay close with you. With the knowledge that you're my soulmate, that makes me want it more. I don't know what exactly either of our stories will be like in the future, but I want you to be one of the main characters in my story."

Dex looked down, vis face flushing red. "You- you're such a dork, you know that? How do you say something so cheesy? But… I can agree too."

Fitz felt his own face heating up a little bit, and was glad that his skin was dark enough for it to not show. It did sound a little cheesy.

"At least we have that much settled. Our stories are still in progress, so we can always wait before adding more plot points."

Ve laughed. "You make it sound so dramatic."

"I'm a writer!"

•~•~•~•~•~•

"So you look happy," Biana remarked as he entered the living room that same night. "I think you somehow look happier than you did last year."

He could still feel the smile on his face. "Dex is my soulmate."

"Wait, really? That's so cool! What happened?"

Fitz recounted the events, then began to describe how it felt. He was sort of able to feel those emotions before he realized, but once the bond was truly established, he was conscious of Dex's emotions, and the other way around. Every once in a while, he could hear Dex's voice in his mind.

"That's amazing!" Ae squealed. "Do you think that either Sophie or Linh could end up as my soulmate? That would be so cool! Even if neither of them aren't, I could see if my soulmate would join the polycule. Even if they don't, I'd be fine with that."

"Both of them could be your soulmates," he said.

"They could," she agreed. "But you know that multiple soulmates are super rare. I'd be so happy if they were both my soulmates though."

"I guess you'd just have to wait and see," he said. "Just like I did."

•~•~•~•~•~•

"I hope our school advances this time!" Dex whispered to him, as they sat down to watch the award ceremony for the plays.

It turned out that the play didn't manage to make it past the district showcase, but it wasn't too saddening. They could definitely understand why some of the other schools had managed to make it.

But just because they didn't make it past the round didn't mean that there weren't awards to be given. The director of their play won an award- and Fitz agreed with that decision. They had done a really good job with everything, including the choreographing of the superpowers.

The other award that their school received was one that Fitz was not surprised about. The award was for an actor and their talents, and he was proud as Dex walked onto the stage to receive the certificate.

I can't believe this is happening! Dex said.

I can, he replied. You did such a good job.

For the rest of that evening, neither of them stopped smiling.

•~•~•~•~•~•

"Hey Dex, can you come act out this part?" Fitz called out.

When there was no reply, he called out for vem mentally. Dex, can you act out a part I'm writing please?

The door to the other bedroom opened, and ve walked into his room. "Sorry, was listening to music."

"That's fine."

"Which part do you want me to act out?"

He turned the laptop screen around so ve could read.

"Broken Harmony, right?" Ve asked.

He nodded. Then he watched as vis posture changed, vis face wearing a cocky grin that resembled Keefe's. When he'd first seen the look, he'd thought that it looked odd on vem, but over the years, he learned more and more about vem. Plus, ve had become a voice actor, and had taken on various roles.

Ve recited the dialogue, and from there, Fitz was able to continue the conversation.

"Thank you," he said out of habit, even though at this point, it was something ve would do everything ve was asked.

Ve smiled. "I'll be back in my room if you need me, okay?"

He nodded. "Okay. Love you."

"Love you too."

•~•~•~•~•~•

I don't leave many notes in the end but that scene where Fitz almost kisses vem on the cheek instinctively is actually something that's happened to me when I was questioning whether I was crushing on my friend or not (it was so embarrassing when I realized. I was in front of multiple people too, so I'm relieved that nobody noticed). Idk why I've decided to share this now, but as I said, I projected a lot onto Fitz this time

Kotlc taglist: @keefeinnit @impostertamsong @my-swan-song @subrosasteath

Want to be added/removed from the kotlc masterlist? Just let me know!

#fitz vacker #dex dizznee #biana vacker #queerplatonic fedex #fedex #kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc fanfiction #ravi writes a thing

15 notes · View notes

willthecleric · 4 years

Note

i really wanna have hope that byler will happen, and i agree with all of the subtext you've pointed out, i just have a really bad feeling that they're not gonna pull through :( i haven't watched the movies on the s4 list, so maybe that's why i feel less certain, but i'm just generally unsure that it will actually happen, despite really wanting it to? how can you be so sure that it will? love ur blog by the way! :D

Aww, thank you so much! Well, I used to have doubts too, so I get what you mean. But remember a few different things:

1. Mike is clearly written as gay, seeing as he is very much comp het in S3 (bisexual boys can imagine themselves in love with females, it isn’t some foreign concept and ‘something old people do’). Many straight guys found Mike’s behaviour with El strange. For a reason: he was trying to be straight and took it too far. He was especially mimicking Lucas. Seeing Mike as gay also recontextualizes a lot of his behaviour in S1 and S2. I just don’t understand why they would make Mike gay and give him so much coding for it if they were planning to have him with a girl. Makes more sense to have him bisexual or straight then. I’m not exagerrating when I say that Mike’s main story arc is about him realizing he is gay and coming to terms with that and accepting his love for Will.

2. When originally writing the S1 script, El was supposed to die. They changed it, my guess, because she helped them with a few plot points (mainly as a beard for Mike). I’m not sure why they’d have wanted her dead initially if Mileven was planned as endgame. That on top of Mike being gay is another strike against Mileven.

3. El is way behind Mike intellectually. Mike is very smart, and El doesn’t even know what a State is. It just doesn’t work and Mike is way older than her intellectually. It is creepy and will just get worse and worse. Not sure why they would do that if Mileven was meant to be endgame.

4. The Duffers parallelled Mileven with ET and Elliott multiple times in S1, and told Finn that Mike saw El as an alien or a puppy. Not at all romantic. Mileven was paralleled to Dustin and Dart in S2. In S3 it was mentioned that Mike saw El as a pet. Mike doesn’t trust El. He couldn’t answer when she told him to trust her, and changed the subject when Max said he doesn’t trust her. Mike was also justifiably upset about El spying on him (which El never felt bad about). Mike lies to El and El stalks/spies on him. Most of S2 Mileven was El stalking and spying on Mike and they used ominous music (so clearly it is not meant to be romantic). Mike had no idea she was watching him, and we saw in S3 how he would have felt if he found out about her doing that. They danced to a song about a stalking ex. Multiple movies hint that El stalks Mike in S4 (which is supported by her in S2 and S3). Those S2 Mileven scenes weren’t meant to be romantic, they are meant to be creepy. Not that I blame El. She is confused and doesn’t understand. She doesn’t know any better. The Duffers hate Mileven. They have dissed it many times (which kaypeace has shown examples of).

5. Mike and El do not share interests or even seem to like each other. El thinks Mike’s interests are dumb and that he talks too much. They don’t trust each other, and trust is essential to love. Period. Neither even sees the other as a person. She has been a tool/weapon to him. And an alien/puppy. It’s a part of his using her as a beard. He doesn’t feel bad about it because he doesn’t see her as a person. He did feel some guilt over her death, but most of him wanting her back in S2 was wanting her to fix him. His attitude problem and issues with Max in S2 were about his growing feelings for Will, NOT about El. Mike was angry at Hopper at the end of S2 because he blamed Hopper for keeping his beard away from him. He thougnt if El was there, he would not have these feelings for Will. Mike blamed Hopper for everything. Why he was so angry with him in S3. And El doesn’t see Mike as a person either. To her, he is a sense of comfort and normalcy, like her teddy bears and Hopper’s shirt. She also projected a soap opera character she liked onto him. El only found Mike attractive when she thought he was a bad boy. She didn’t know if she liked kissing him after months of making out. She referred to him as her first boyfriend, implying she was thinking of dating others in the future. There is a reason why she came to Mike three months after the main events of the season. Comfort. She lost her dad and was moving away from her new home. She was seeking normalcy. Mike is that to her.

6. They made the ending with Mileven ambiguous as far as if they are dating or not. Which idk why they would do that if Mileven was the main ship. Why make it ambiguous? I think it was intentionally done that way. El was acting romantic while Mike was more platonic in nature. I think that is to hint towards them not being on the same page. As I mentioned, numerous movies and show canon hints to El stalking Mike and spying on him. Multiple movies have Mike frustrated and not interested. And we already saw how he felt about El spying on him. I think El believes they are dating and doesn’t get it when Mike and others tell her that they are not. She doesn’t understand.

7. They made numerous Mileven and Byler parallels in S3, of S2 Byler moments redone for Mileven, and things happening between both ships in the same season. Byler always won by a landslide. They completely destroyed Mileven instead of building it up, which makes no sense if it’s endgame. Mileven had poor development from the start, and if they wanted to pull it off, makes more sense to work hard to build them up instead. Also driving away the fandom so it’s not popular anymore... why do that? It makes no sense. Queer baits don’t do that. Seems more like a straight bait to me.

8. In S1, homophobic Troy was: shoved by Mike (who is gay), forced to piss his pants in front of the school who laughed at him, had his arm broken, and was made to look like a fool. This shows what they think about homophobes. They also have posted LGBT+ positivity on Twitter. They are not homophobic and do not support homophobia. They are not going to work to please a bunch of homophobic Milevens.

9. According to multiple movies and show hints, Byler is essential and key to fixing everything. The Never Ending Story was repeatedly in S3 for a reason. It’s a hint. Not just at Will being the chosen one instead of El, but also... ‘and there upon a rainbow is the answer to a never ending story’. It’s outright telling us that Byler is the answer. Not only because rainbows are a gay symbol in itself, but Mike is also connected to rainbows as a part of his coding.

10. Multiple movies hint that Stranger Things is a book written by Mike for Will, sharing his story and their love story. Mike is the character who wants to be a writer, and the episodes are called CHAPTERS. That supports Stranger Things being a book. And the book is always written by the Mike character for the Will character. They let it be known that Mike wants to be a writer. It was mentioned as his career goal in his yearbook page, and he writes most of the D&D campaigns (besides the one that Will wrote).

11. Byler is the biggest and main relationship of the show. It’s the relationship that gets the most development, the one that gets the most romantic scenes, the one that gets the most coding by far. And every single pairing (minus Jopper and Ted/Karen as far as I can tell) parallels Byler while it is healthy and happy. The moment that stops being the case, they start paralleling Mileven. Not a good sign for Mileven. And Mileven only parallels Byler a lot because Mike has been using El as a substitute for Will (something that is mentioned by the Mike character in a number of movies, using the El character of the movie as a substitute to the Will character).

Hopefully this helped you (and anyone else) feel better about things. 😃

121 notes · View notes

skybird13 · 4 years

Text

*sigh* Okay...

I’ve been debating on whether or not to make this post. Not because it doesn’t need to be made, but because I’m not sure I’m emotionally up for it. But at the end of the day, staying quiet is exactly what got us into this mess, and curling into a sad little ball isn’t going to change what happened, and this particular shit needs to be called out and acknowledged.

I was asked to address something posted by Eddy Rivas, one of the writers of RWBY, on Reddit yesterday. It was a shortlived post because apparently he or someone who read it realized what a monumentally bad idea it was, but sadly for him, my fellow cockroach gays are pissed as hell and we have screenshot capabilities. I don’t care that he removed/edited the post. This was still his instinctive response to the absolute pain caused by him and the rest of CRWBY as a result of volume 7 episode 12:

I am so damn tired and so hurt. But I am going to do my best to address this in a civil and reasonable way.

The Problem With Judgment Calls

First of all, to an extent, I understand the predicament Eddy describes. I really do. I get that being on the creative end of a popular web series is very different from being on the fandom end, and conventional wisdom dictates that creators should do their best to make sure the two don’t mix past a certain point. That necessary separation probably does make these kinds of judgment calls difficult.

The problem is that several members of CRWBY (including writers, animators both former and current, social media managers, and the marketing team specifically) violated that boundary more than once long before episode 12 aired. There were so many things that factored into Fair Game gaining traction as quickly as it did, and many of those things came from the deliberate way that many members of CRWBY interacted with the fandom outside of the show itself. From the official RWBY Twitter account to the suggestive tweets made by a former animator, to the Twitter and Tumblr posts made by a current animator, this ship was heavily and unambiguously encouraged and leaned on multiple times over the course of this volume.

Sure, you can make the claim that you can’t control the animators (especially if they no longer work for you), or that the creators and the marketing team are two separate entities and that the actions of one do not necessarily reflect the intentions of the other (both things also stated by Eddy Rivas in a series of Tweets). And perhaps some of that is accurate. It points towards a fundamental lack of oversight and cohesiveness in the organization that is Rooster Teeth, and that should absolutely be addressed moving forward, but quite frankly, in this case, it doesn’t even matter.

The fact of the matter, Mr. Rivas, is that the boundary was violated. Multiple times. On your end. These types of judgment calls are not a one size fits all, and the moment active members of CRWBY took action to encourage something you knew was going to cause pain, it should have been addressed. I’m not putting that on you personally, because as a writer I realize you probably don’t have that type of authority, but someone there should have put a stop to it. There is the matter of the personal responsibility shirked by the two animators who contributed to this mess, and frankly, they should have known better, but this does not excuse CRWBY’s collective silence.

The fact of the matter is that due to the actions taken by CRWBY both in and outside of the show (including the things you could and could not control) you absolutely reached a point where that boundary should have been purposefully crossed in order to mitigate damage. It doesn’t matter what got you or us there. It doesn’t matter whether or not it was intentionally done (it was, let’s not kid ourselves). Things built up, hopes were raised as a direct result of your actions, and you all reached a point where you were morally obligated to say something. Do I suggest a single individual should have taken this on? No. I understand the legal ramifications of that. But CRWBY as a whole and RT as the production studio absolutely should have stepped forward. Would that have fully removed the pain and the disappointment? No. But you wouldn’t be facing the backlash you are right now if you had.

The Problem with One-Size-Fits-All

Closely related to the previous point is the fact that you, Mr. Rivas, seem to be under the impression that a single judgment call policy should and can apply to all situations equally. That’s not the case. We’re not talking about other ships here, hypothetical, canonical, realistic, unrealistic, or otherwise. We’re talking about this ship.

The Fair Game ship was the first and only indication we had in seven volumes of RWBY that a prominent mlm relationship might be coming in to play. You have no other relationships of this nature in the show. You don’t even have other male characters who might be able to qualify as gay or bisexual who play major roles. Add on to that the fact that you planned to have one of these characters die in the most brutal and graphic death scene we have gotten to date in RWBY, and no. I’m sorry. That flimsy defense doesn’t stand. This ship was unique, it appealed to a very underserved segment of your fandom, and it should have been treated with the levity it deserved.

You make the argument that saying something about this ship but not others wasn’t plausible. The issue with that, sir, is one of trust. Up to this point, I and a lot of people I know trusted you, which means you can get away with building up relationships without ever coming out to confirm or deny them offscreen. As long as you understand the narrative promises you’re making as a storyteller to your audience, and understand the importance of fulfilling them through narrative payoff at some point in the story, we’re usually pretty willing to follow you and watch it unfold. This is how writing works. You have to be aware of the promises you’re making and you have to be able to follow through on them in satisfying ways. This goes double if you plan to fulfill them in unexpected ways (note the word fulfilled still applies). If you don’t do that, trust is broken and you have a problem.

Fair Game is unique in that you knew from the beginning that trust was going to not only be violated but brutally so. CRWBY made promises with Clover and Qrow that they never intended to keep, and that is one of the core issues here. If you want to cling to the excuse that it was all unintentional (again, one I do not buy), that only means you absolutely should have said something to that effect long before we ever got to this point. It would have given nothing about the plot away to let us know that wasn’t the intended direction and it would have calmed down the excitement that built up so quickly around the ship. It certainly would have prevented a lot of people from being emotionally and psychologically damaged as a result of having that trust destroyed.

Not saying something about relationships that may or may not happen is VERY different from not saying something about a ship that you know is not going to happen because you plan to brutalize and murder one of the characters on screen in spite of the narrative promises made. Particularly when the ship in question would have offered rep to people who thus far in the show ( when we’re over halfway through the series) still have none.

No rep to be found here...

I’m not sure I should even have to address this but apparently, it needs to be said. It will be short because it’s a pretty damn simple answer.

You want to know “how well [saying no rep to be found here would] have gone over?” A hell of a lot better than the queerbaiting fest you have victimized us all to for the last three months. Would you still have had disappointed fans on your hands? Absolutely. But the psychological and emotional damage you all caused in episode 12 could have been so easily avoided, and that should have taken precedence over whatever tension you wanted to maintain between these characters in the show.

This should not have been a difficult decision, and quite frankly, the fact that you don’t understand this is a little alarming.

We Are Not a Shopping Montage

Alright. Here is where my civility is going to deteriorate noticeably, so fair warning.

You had the audacity to compare the emotional trauma of hundreds of LGBTQ fans to the disappointment of not getting a fucking shopping montage??? You even acknowledge that on an emotional level these two things are nowhere near being the same thing, and you still tried to justify your actions and the actions of CRWBY with it? That emotional fallout is the thing that matters here.

But there’s even more to it than that.

The hopes for a shopping montage came from a single Tweet from the official RWBY Twitter (if I remember right) about a montage scene being in volume 7. That was it. That was all fans had to go off of. This absolutely was a case of imaginations running wild and people hoping for a scene that, quite frankly, in light of the show’s trajectory since volume 3, wasn’t a reasonable expectation to begin with. CRWBY was in no way complicit in or responsible for this expectation that I know of, and even if you were.... It. Was. A. Shopping. Montage.

And you dare to compare that with the intentional queer coding of Qrow and Clover’s relationship in the writing, the animation choices, the character design for Clover, and the behavior of CRWBY on social media, only for Clover to die horrifically and for Qrow to be absolutely destroyed emotionally and mentally on-screen??? You dare to relate the disappointment of people who didn’t get a pointless shopping scene with the trauma of watching a loved character’s murder and another loved character’s emotional/mental destruction??? Really? That seemed like an appropriate thing to say?

I don’t even know what else to say to this except absolute world-shattering shame on you, sir. How dare you?

And then to top all of this off, instead of apologizing, instead of showing some contrition, you tried to delete this post and pretend you never said it. Did you hope we wouldn’t notice? That we wouldn’t react if you tried to take it down? Were you even the one who realized what you said or did you need it pointed out to you?

You should not be a writer, sir. You sure as hell should not be a creator of content that engages with people on an emotional level because you clearly have no respect for it and no understanding of the responsibility you bear because of it.

What is wrong with you?

Tagging @fairgame-is-endgame who asked me to say something on this absolute bullshit.

#fair game #crwby #wtf crwby #rwby #rwby7 #rwby7 spoilers #rwby spoilers #qrow branwen #clover ebi #eddy rivas

601 notes · View notes

drunklander · 4 years

Text

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 502

Watched this episode after winning Wynonna Earp trivia (fuck yeah, The Shit Tickets!) at a bar, put on by a queer af podcast, followed by going to see a queer af movie, and was all ready to get my Beauchamp fix... And it was like oh here’s a taste and a hint that we’re gonna end up in a story line similar to what we’ve already done multiple times, but now on to the menfolk.

For real though, this episode was like an OL greatest hits clip show. It had all the stuff we’ve seen before. A time traveler who wants to go home? Check. Rape PTSD? Check. A man being a dad to a kid who isn’t/might not be his? Check. That same man being the absolute worst? Check. Claire being reckless with future medicine? Check. Townsfolk questioning Claire’s medical knowledge in favor of the local Man of Importance? Check. Jamie trying to be on both sides at once? Check. A villain who seemed to have died the previous season and should have fucking stayed dead? Check.

We’ve literally seen all of this stuff before.

For a show that spent the first part of season two claiming to be a political drama and then last season claiming that they “weren’t political” I see we’re back to just leaning hard into politics that have direct parallels today.

No fucks left to give about the system Murtz is kind of my favorite Murtz. Like this dude spent his whole life living by a code and an oath and was fucked over by the system so many fucking times that he’s ready to just burn it all down. Curious to see how they walk the domestic terrorist vs. freedom fighter line with him for the rest of the season.

Got all excited about the bread title card because yay medicinal mold, but of course, the lead character was relegated to the B story.

Old timey medicine baffles me. Like the fact that bleeding someone was like a catchall remedy boggles the mind.

I feel rull bad for Mrs. Whoeverthefuck though. She tried.

Also, shit like this makes me be like, yo Claire, you sure you wanna stay here? Jamie’s really not all that and a bag of chips. But you do you, boo.

Speaking of Jamie, his hair looks really good. A thousand fruit baskets to the new wig person.

Lulz at Knox thinking the Gathering was about being loyal to king and country. Dummy.

Srsly though, Murtz Valmurtz is really getting under their skin. Is he like the *only* Regulator leader?

The convo between Knox and Jamie is literally as relevant today as it is in the 1770s. But yeah, the show IsN’t PoLiTiCaL.

The fact that fuckers think those at the bottom should be happy with their lot because “lol it could be worse” need to be punched in the face and taken out of power. Stat.

Also any time someone in power talks about civility as a reason not to rise up against injustice, I want to punch them. Because they deserve it.

I want to punch a lot of things.

This whole episode is very Les Mis, tbh.

Literalol at Claire covering dead guy’s face and not his body cavity before Bree comes in.

Aw Bree, why you gotta be a buzzkill? We were cheated of badass Doctor!Claire in S3. Let us have this.

Also, yeah, Claire, Bree’s fucking right. Which you’d think you’d know by now what with alL THE FUCKING TIMES YOU’VE BEEN CALLED A WITCH. AND NOW YOU’RE UPPING YOUR GAME TO LIKE NECROMANCY?!

Also the more she says no one will find out the more annoying it is because *clearly* someone *is* gonna find out and we’re gonna be back on the “she’s a witch!” “I’m not a witch!” “you literally have a dead guy in your closet!” merry-go-round again.

Today in most on-the-nose shots ever: How convenient that Marsali just happens to be doing some butchering right there, right then.

Petition for the show to go full Shondaland and just turn into a backwoods medical drama with Claire and Marsali, and all the others (cough the men cough) can fuck on off.

Tarring and feathering is like the old timey version of #AlwaysPunchAFascist but dialed to 11.

Oh the baggage behind Jamie saying redcoat man will someday wear his scars with honor that none of these fuckers know about...

Ok so clearly the English know that Claire’s a doctor so whenever shit hits the witchy dead dude fan, can we please have a quick resolution and not that dumb af “Claire goes to jail and of course her cellmate is a lesbian because Diana sucks at writing queer characters” nonsense?

Man Jamie is *not* subtle with this convo at the jail. Like Knox is right there and he’s just like hey buddies, I have people and we’re Scottish and y’know how we feel about protecting people vs. obeying the English.

I AM SPARTACUS FITZGIBBONS!

Aaand, naturally, the fuckwit preaching civility is the one to kill a man in cold blood. Rise up, motherfuckers. Rise up.

THANK FUCK ROGER IS A TERRIBLE SHOT BECAUSE IF THAT SQUIRREL DIED I WOULD LEGIT QUIT THE SHOW. RUN AWAY AND BE FREEEEEE YOU PRECIOUS LIL WILDERNESS FLOOFER!

Roger is, and I cannot stress this enough, the fucking worst.

He’s like look how shitty I am at being a soldier but then bitches about having to try to learn. And then he bitches about how dumb it is to shoot at squirrels as if being able to hit a squirrel wouldn’t make hitting a much larger thing, like a man who is shooting back at you, that much easier. And also, how the fuck does he think they get meat to eat? Shooting it, you twatwaffle.

And he’s like so fucking butthurt about being left behind. Like no shit, asshat. You’re bad at being in the past and have made no real effort and you whine a lot and are generally the worst. Of *course* you were left behind. Stop being emo about it and maybe actually try.

“He doesn’t respect me, Bree.” Yeah, no shit. Because you’ve done LITERALLY NOTHING to earn his respect. WHY ARE YOU SO TERRIBLE IT’S LIKE THEY’RE INTENTIONALLY TRYING TO MAKE HIM SUCK.

He also is like butthurt that his wife is a better shot than him when she gets the turkey he misses. How the fuck are we supposed to ship this. Ugh.

#BreeDeservesBetter

Oh Bree, sweetie, Jem won’t get hit by a car, but there are like eleventy million ways to die in the past. Just stick with the “you want to stay with your family” stuff.

Roger clearly doesn’t want to stay and is gonna pull a Fred and make Bree feel bad about wanting to all season, isn’t he. Fahkin’ doucherocket.

“I want to go but I’ll stay for you and look how magnanimous I am as I whine about it and make no effort to acclimate to the time.” Take your martyr card and shove it, Rog.

Shorter Jamie Fraser: “If you stand for nothing, Knox, what’ll you fall for?”

I’m already over Roger singing all the time tbh. Mostly because it reminds me that soon he won’t be able to do that anymore and we’re gonna be subjected to like half a season of him being more insufferable than he already is.

Wait, was Joan already born last episode? Or was there another time jump? Is Marsali preggers with baby #3? I lost track.

I love this scene between Claire and Marsali with my whole heart. Marsali especially.

CAN WE PLEASE JUST HAVE A WHOLE SHOW OF THESE TWO BEING ALL BADASS AND DOCTORY TOGETHER!?

Although, quick question, how fucking long is Claire planning to keep that un-embalmed body lying around in an un-refrigerated surgery/root cellar? Just curious...

Because you know someone’s gonna find it eventually and that’s gonna be a whole to do and I really need to stop being preemptively annoyed at plot lines that haven’t actually happened yet.

And with all this talk of plowshares and swords, I really am going to be singing Les Mis for days...

How long have these biddies been living on the Ridge? The fucking Leoch folks spent like a minute with Claire before they were like yep, she knows what’s up. These folks have apparently been here for months and are like loool, pass. They live in the fucking woods. You’d think they’d be more open to Claire’s brand of medicine.

Omg are they like the accidental antivaxxers of the Ridge?

#VaccinateYourFuckingKids

I mean, Bree, I think there’s some difference between Claire pretending to be a dude doc and telling folks to wash their hands and Otter Tooth.

Season 2 Claire and Otter Tooth on the other hand...

Ok so Jamie needs more men so that means next week is AHS: Beardsley Farm and then maybe (hopefully) instead of being like lol jk you can all go home, it actually goes right into the battle thing. Still not sure if they’re gonna do Roger getting hanged as the mid-season big thingy and then do the Bonnet nonsense in the back half or keep trying to do both of those at once.

Hey, Roger, pro-tip, next time you see Morag MacKenzie, maybe don’t fuCKING MAKE OUT WITH HER YOU FUCKING DUMBASS.

Claire’s totally right about how they should go back. Honestly, they should. But instead of talking with her like Claire is now with Roger, he’s just being all moody about how he’s bad at the past and wants to go back. You’re shooting yourself in the foot, broski.

Oh hey Husband the Quaker. And is that a fellow Quaker named Hunter with him? Are we gonna get Denny and Rachel this season?! Please and thank you that’d be great, I love them.

Murtz talking to his squad is full on Enjolras being like don’t worry fam, Marius will stand and fight with us. His place is there, he’ll fight with you.

The two very different but very similar ways Murtz and Jamie approach being Laird of their squads is fun to explore.

Bree lecturing Claire about changing the future by saving a few backwater hicks like Claire didn’t spend years trying to fucking change all of Scottish history is a bit rich. Like writers, we get it, you’re trying to be like oh snap, wait for the consequences of this bread!science! But like come the fuck on. We sat through all of season two.

“You’re a good dad, you know that?” Oh man, I’m getting that déjà vu about a shitty man getting kudos for being a good dad to a kid as if that negates all of his shittiness.

Oh hey, Bonnet’s back. Clearly we couldn’t have just let him die last season. Gotta drag shit on for longer than it has to. This is the [Outlander] Way.

If they were gonna keep him around as a villain, they shouldn’t have (in addition to all the other reasons) included him raping Bree. Jamie, Murtagh and Bonnet all making choices within and outside of the law to various degrees in order to make their living in the Colonies would be a really interesting contrast. But nope, gotta just go all in. BeCaUsE tHe BoOk.

Also I hate with the passion of a thousand fiery suns the Jemmy’s paternity stuff. Le sigh.

Remember in season one when the show was about Claire and she was in episodes for longer than 10 minutes?

I miss Claire.

#*#outlander starz #outlander 5x02 #drunj!der yells about outlander

63 notes · View notes

norahastuff · 5 years

Note

At this point , I am really scared , I need some reassurance that Destiel will happen , so many posts saying that it is unlikely , please help!! :(

Ok first of all, I get it. These days I’m relatively chill about most aspects of the show, just taking things as they come and trying to enjoy the story they’re telling - it’s still a pretty good one - but I have those moments too. For example my knee jerk reaction to the “Cas has failed his brothers” tweet (which again means nothing - people that run the CW social media accounts know next to nothing about what’s going on in the show) was genuinely “I can’t believe Dean made Cas a mixtape of the music his parents fell in love over, in a scene that was shot so romantically, and people are still out here calling them brothers.”

And honestly that’s still where I’m stuck with all of this. I haven’t been in fandom long. I never even really knew what shipping was until last year. I was watching, enjoying and analysing the show (albeit in my own head), long before I found tumblr, and had thought it was blindingly obvious that there were romantic elements to Dean and Cas’ relationship. I think that’s something a lot of us forget when we’re talking about “Canon Destiel” and what will happen etc. We discount everything that has already happened between them in favour of some proof down the road. Which I get, trust me, but I really don’t think we should forget everything that led us to see Dean and Cas this way to begin with.

Ok so what helps me mostly be chill about all this?

1) The wealth of canon material that already exists between them (mixtapes, grief arcs, human weakness, colette parallels, sweeping reunions set to rousing musical cues, Amara supposedly having control over Dean but when in a room with her and Cas all Dean can do is call out Cas’ name over and over again in a broken voice - I honestly could go on all day.)

2) I don’t believe any of this was being done in bad faith.

I’m going to focus on 3 of the current writers, 2 of whom are openly queer and one of whom is the showrunner:

Berens

His first episode 9x06 was the one where Misha was instructed to play Cas as a “jilted lover” by Carver, the showrunner, and that episode was just romantic af. There’s so much staring through wistfully at each other it’s ridiculous. If you watch Berens episodes, it’s pretty clear that he considers Dean and Cas’ relationship vital, he often makes a point to place them in the same tier of importance as Sam and Dean’s relationship, and on top of that it seems to me he’s always just contextualised their relationship as having romantic elements. Whether it’s Colette parallels or mixtapes, Bobo’s always presented them a certain way.

Yockey

If you even glance at Yockey’s resume you’ll be able to see he’s a genius playwright whose work tends to focus on gay relationship dramas. Of course that in no way means that any relationship between two men that he writes has to be romantic, but what it does mean is that he understands when it is. It does mean that when he writes an episode like 12x10 (an ep about angels falling in love with humans), where Dean and Cas are bickering like a married couple and Ishim dubs the woman he was in love with his human weakness, whilst in the same breath calling Dean Cas’ human weakness, he’s doing it intentionally. That episode was a lot of things, well written, smart, beautifully crafted - but one thing it was not was subtle. Claiming Yockey didn’t mean it that way seems pretty absurd to me, and honestly, trying to claim Yockey - a gay man who writes nuanced LGBT+ stories - meant it as bait or whatever, is even worse. I mean that episode even had an exploration of how angels do not have genders like humans do by showing Cas in a female vessel and having him reiterate that angels are their own thing, regardless of whether they are in a male or female vessel at any given time.

That’s not even mentioning 13x05 and how ridiculously romantic that ep was. I mean I can’t - that final scene was ridiculous.

Andrew Dabb

And then we come to the showrunner himself. Dabb joined the show the same season that Cas did. He’s always placed a great deal of importance on Dean and Cas’ relationship, and always made sure to differentiate it from Sam and Cas. Even as early as 5x16, he made sure to emphasise how it was Dean who felt for Cas when he lost his faith in God (note: I don’t think there was any romantic intent there at the time but he was showing the depth and importance of their bond even back then.) 8x08 with the “talk to me” and the heart breaking conversation that followed that was cut short when Sam walked in. Dabb cares.

Dabb has also clearly been intrigued with the potentially romantic aspects of their relationship. I don’t know what his intentions have ever been with it, but at the very least, he has often seemed like he wanted to explore it. In 9x22 where Metatron delivers the “he’s in love with..,humanity” line, Dabb reportedly wrote that Metatron created Cas’ heaven as having tons of photos of naked Dean (which allegedly was axed by a higher up). His era led to Cas being given a vital, central role in the show and story like he’d never had before and also the escalation of the Dean/Cas romantic story like never before. In Dabb’s eps all of heaven and hell assume they’re banging with a demon even saying it to Cas’ face. Not to mention 12x23. Just all of it. Seriously.

I have no idea what TPTB intentions are, or ever have been, with Destiel as an eventual textual development, and yes I definitely believe that the right thing to do is for them to address it in some way. But I will say it bothers me a little when people throw it into the same category as a couple of other shows that shall not be named for the very important reason that the show has never invalidated any of the romantic elements of this relationship they’ve crafted between Dean and Cas, at least not post s8 and certainly not since Dabb took over around mid s11.

Kripke and Gamble definitely had a different approach that was pretty much just homoerotic subtext with the occasional (extremely on the nose) gay joke thrown in, but that’s not something Carver and Dabb did. However explicit they did/will get with it, every development between Dean and Cas has been anchored by serious emotional importance and nothing about their bond has ever been dismissed or downplayed as unimportant.

If there’s one thing I’m reasonably confident about is that that isn’t going to change. They’re not going to invalidate or “no homo” any of this by throwing Dean or Cas a last minute love interest. There’s a lot simmering under the surface between Dean and Cas right now, has been for a while now, and it’s definitely something they’re going to address if they’re going to give any kind of sensical end to their story.

Regardless of how explicit it winds up being - and again I want to reiterate, I do understand people’s pain and frustration if it winds up not being especially overt - this is a story that the people who created it cared about. The writers have treated in seriously and none of them ever mocked or dismissed any of the fans and are not evil villains cackling over a cauldron because they’ve tricked so many people with this story. Also, because I’ve been seeing some baffling commentary about intent - some from former Destiel shippers even - even if there isn’t a clear cut romantic endgame that makes it obvious to 100% of the GA, none of that invalidates all the romantic storytelling that has been, and continues to be, a part of the narrative for a long time now. It exists. To quote Misha “you are not crazy.” And don’t let anyone make you believe that you are.

TLDR: I have no idea what’s coming next and I’m sorry but I can’t give you any assurance that things are going to be wrapped up the way you or I would want them to be, but I can give you my long rambling thoughts about why I feel the way I do. Why it can still bug me that we can watch a story that if it was between a man and a woman would be blindingly clear to everyone but if it’s m/m (or even w/w) has constant denials levelled against it, but how at the same time I’m not constantly filled with rage or sadness about why it has played out the way it has.

So yeah, that’s how I’m going into the final season. There’s a lot more I wanted to say but looking at this wall of text I’m realising I’ve already gone on for far too long so I’ll stop now.

#spnloversstuff #asks #canon destiel #my spn thoughts

210 notes · View notes

dgcatanisiri · 4 years

Text

*writes up a half page ranting response*

*closes window*

No. I’m not going to get anywhere by doing that. But... GAH...

So, yeah, I’m gonna rant on my own instead of responding to a confession.

So, I’m not making value judgments on other people. I’m not telling them they can or can not like certain characters, certain stories, whatever. I’m not attempting to police people’s way of thinking. All I do with my various rants and ravings, which I try to tag appropriately, is express my views and opinions and at the least try to explain why it is that I am approaching things the way that I do.

So, my opinion: Dorian Pavus is a lousy, reductive character that brought nothing to the table that hadn’t been provided by no less than a dozen, and I’m underselling that point, characters in other media. To say nothing of my dislike of him on a personal level, finding him arrogant and obnoxious. And if this is the quality that BioWare approaches their gay characters, which, based on what happened with both Steve Cortez and Gil Brodie, seems like the case, I DON’T. want them to be writing more gay characters, because they SUCK at it.

My reasoning for this is based on the fact that all these characters have yet to be a character who the player seems expected to walk away from the game, if they must remember one fact about them, is the fact that they’re gay. It’s all that they’re there to be. The gay character. At most, you might be able to argue Steve, that he’s “the widower,” and not necessarily “the gay widower,” but still. What EXISTS about these characters beyond their sexuality? What do they provide, on a character, on a story level, that is not directly tied to their sexuality, to who they are banging and the fact that it happens to be another man?

Dorian? His entire personal quest revolves around his father not accepting him for being gay. Gil? Reduced to his straight best friend accessory and turkey baster. Steve? Exists to be in mourning for his husband, and possibly for Shepard to catch on the rebound. THIS is the caliber of BioWare’s writing for gay men.

I mean, take a look through my “another angry queer rant” tag. This is something I have LONG gone in on, because that’s their portrayal of gay characters. That’s the approach they take - make these characters have their character and characterization depend on them being gay. Write them in a way that makes it such a big deal that it’s the driving force of their portrayal in the game.

This is, I’ll be fair, something that I see as being born of generation gap - the writers at BioWare, the people who wrote these stories, came of age in a different era that queer people my age and younger. They grow up with the looming specter of the AIDS crisis. Being gay was something to hide, because it quickly led to a death sentence, either from the disease itself or because the straight people would decide to kill you before you had a chance to “infect” them. While the world today is still a massive work in progress on this front, it is still better than that.

So to a writer who lived through that, even while in the closet, when they do what I tend to think writers do and write to the child they were, the child in need of a role model, they are writing characters who are open and upfront about being gay. Who are making it a core part of their identity to reach back to that child and say “it’s okay.

BUT - there’s always a but - but, to MY generation, to the generations who are coming after that period, instead of coming across as trying to be revolutionary, of having gay characters who exist openly as gay... To these younger generations, it instead just comes off as reducing these characters to no more than their gayness, that ‘being gay’ is all the identity and story and existence they need. Because when you take away the time spent on highlighting their gayness, what story are you left with? What character are you left with? Does this character EXIST in the narrative as a person, or as a walking demand to be seen as a gay character?

And, y’know, to some, that demand is ignored anyway - witness the bi!Dorian mods. Witness the fact that there are mods that make Gil romanceable by Sis!Ryder - like, what are you getting out of that? I say this as someone who romances Gil, but... Really, WHAT do you get out of a mod like that? And the only answer I can come to on that question is that it is this group of straight women who are upset about ANY content they are locked out of on the basis of gender.

But that’s a separate issue for a separate rant. Just bringing it up because it points out that trying to use characters to demand that they are viewed as a gay person... It doesn’t have any effect on someone who is being homophobic. They will disregard that if they so choose. So using these characters as an anvil on the issues of gay people? Not exactly doing much. Meanwhile, as I said, to a new generation, this is reductive.

Like, I see a character like Dorian, I think about what would have happened if he’d been in the media for my teenage “struggling with my sexuality” self. And the answer I reach, the conclusion I come up to, is that, at most, he wouldn’t be a help. At worst, he’d be a dagger - THIS is the example he would have of what it is to be gay... And that’s not him. So does that mean he’s not actually gay? Well, he’s attracted to other guys, so he doesn’t think so. But then... who does he get to look up to? Who is his role model? Because it’s not Dorian.

That’s what gets to me with BioWare’s portrayal of gay men. In Dragon Age, gay men consist of Dorian, who I just went over, Wade and Herren (by way only of word of god...), who... That’s worse, in my opinion, considering the abuse they hurl at each other on the job, on top of being side characters we are meant to laugh at, and... That’s really about it. In Mass Effect, we have Steve Cortez and Gil Brodie, who, okay, in terms of personality might be better examples, but... Their portrayal in the game basically reduces them to a single element - “my dead husband” or “my best friend wants me to be her turkey baster” - and doesn’t explore them AS INDIVIDUAL PEOPLE, just as “messages” to be delivered.

That’s my representation as a gay person. Joke, reductive, or The Message™. That’s not a good track record.

So this leads me to advocate for the romances to be all bisexual. Because at least then, the characters are not defined by their sexuality. Because at least then, BioWare can’t restrict their Prince Charming style romance to women. Like, stop and consider for a moment. In the last seven BioWare games, not counting Anthem, the four Mass Effects and the three Dragon Ages, how many characters would you say really repeat a single, primary archetype? Like, if you were to reduce a character to a single trope on their TVTropes character bio, which would you pull out to describe a character to someone else so they got the core idea of who this character is? What it is like going through their character arc? Through their romance arc?

Because at least for me, “Knight in Shining Armor” could be applied to AT LEAST three characters, based on their portrayal in their respective games: Alistair, Cullen, and Cassandra. All three are straight romances. Two are from the same game. Two are the same gender.

I cannot think of a SINGLE gay - or bi - character who I would use that term with. This is a PROBLEM.

Because, again, as I’ve said repeatedly, BioWare TAPS. THE SAME. WELLS. with their same-sex options. Gay/bi men are sketchy, suspicious, someone on the outside of the dominant society of the places we are playing in. And I’m not saying that this is intentionally done on BioWare’s part, but it’s a pattern of behavior that they are perpetuating. The gay/bi options they offer are variations of the bad boy, and just about ONLY the bad boy - the exceptions are Kaidan and Jaal, who it took fan demand to get them as bi options, and then Cortez and Gil, who, as I’ve already said, don’t get enough characterization to qualify either way - sure, Gil’s probably not a bad boy in the traditional sense, particularly in comparison to Reyes, but... We come back to the issue of “what else IS there to him in the first place?”

BioWare’s portrayal of gay men is flawed at best. I don’t have FAITH in their ability to provide solid queer representation when they are giving us characters of a single set sexuality, because they fall back into these patterns that are painful, are reductive, are... just not reaching the audience that needs more to their representation.

And, as I’ve gone into elsewhere, the romances are ALWAYS playersexual, so that’s really no excuse either, because why would Alistair romance someone who sacrifices Isolde and Connor, his adoptive family? Would Morrigan REALLY come to love a goodie-two shoes who stops to pull kittens out of a tree? No, really, WHY is Liara devoting herself to a racist, xenophobic bastard? The romance options are playersexual by definition, so stop deluding yourself that it only comes into play when the romances are all bisexual.

#dg rants #another angry queer rant #bioware critical

2 notes · View notes

torturedpoetemotions · 5 years

Text

Destiel subtext is queerbaiting, not fanservice.

And no, fanservice and queerbaiting are not the same thing.

Fanservice is material intentionally added just to please the audience. Fanservice was a recent show having two het ships sleep together just for the fuck of it (no pun intended), when it really didn't matter to the characters' arcs or the plot at all.

Queerbaiting is hinting around at queer representation without ever delivering. Queerbaiting is marketing your film on a "purely gay moment" that it turns out is hard to even notice because it happens so fast and is so understated and inconclusive.

Queerbaiting is using a queer couple for positive press and lying to your actors to keep them encouraging fans of the couple on social media while knowing you're going to kill one character off before he even gets to see the other character again.

Queerbaiting is writing a decade of romantic framing, just-short-of love declarations, and joking allusions to sex for the same couple but never actually having either character act on it or even admit that it's there.

The point is, fanservice is indisputably there. Queerbaiting entails some level of deniability on either side by its very nature.

Fanservice is risky, because it might please fans...or it might just piss them off and/or leave them feeling betrayed. Queerbaiting is a sure thing...in that it will ALWAYS ultimately leave its target audience feeling pissed off and betrayed.

Queer fans have been pretty loud and clear at this point that queerbaiting does NOT please us. No writer, showrunner, or actor not living under a rock with their fingers in their ears going "LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEEEAAAR YOOOOOOOUUUUU" could possibly think queer fans would find queerbaiting anything but disgusting and infuriating at this point.

In fact, a few years ago there was a push by Destiel fans, many of them queer fans, for the writers to just go ahead and tell us if it was never going to happen, because we would prefer that to being led around by the nose. There were literally people pleading with the writers on twitter, just tell us if this is all a joke to you, because we can take that but we can't take the false hope anymore.

But they refused to confirm or deny, and instead the only one denying--in the most disrespectful way possible, whether he knows/means it or not--is Jensen, an actor with an ultimately unknown level of control over the script, while the writers continue to write queerbaity subtext into canon season after season.

So if they shoehorn something into the last season, they can claim it was planned all along and they--including Jensen--just couldn't spoil it. But if they don't--which at this point seems far more likely--they can claim it wasn't queerbaiting, it was all in our heads the whole time and Jensen told us so!

They've continued with the plausible deniability inherent in queerbaiting, in other words. And at this point in this specific fandom it's practically risen to the level of gaslighting.

So no, Jensen going along with subtext and making jokes about Destiel when it amused him to do so, then shutting it down when the fans who feel represented and seen because of it want something real is in no way "fanservice." And any SPN writer, actor, or showrunner who thinks it is needs to be taken off the air for being decades out of touch with their specific audience, their network, and their overall demographic.

#supernatural #destiel #queerbaiting #fanservice #i'm done with spn queerbaiting us #and i'm extra done with fans excusing and defending it

2 notes · View notes

alvadee · 2 years

Note

I just have to say, it's pretty shitty of you to call out gay men for how they interoperate or represent VB just because you don't agree with it, when you, yourself have objectified him in the past and ignored his homosexuality to imagine yourself with him. You try to cover it up by saying you don't want to generalize but that's exactly what you're doing and at best you come across ignorant and at worst, actually homophobic.

Ok, so here's the deal.

I have spent years now going through archives and talking to many people who actually knew Victor, I think I've did my research on him the best I can with the means I have. I do not think the other writers (Ryan Murphy for Feud, the guy from the play) have been as dedicated as me to learn about him and have invested the same time I have. Based on that I do think that I am allowed to criticize their protrayal of him and my voice has some weight. Is every single thing I critize them for correct? I don't know since I don't know every detail about all aspects of Vic's life but I try to go by context clues. Is it the writer's right as artists to use him in their fictionalized stories, yes of course, does that mean I have to like their interpretation and can't criticize it? No.

Also, for how many year in human history have women had crushes on obviously gay or not so obviously gay men? If they imagine themselves with them is that really homophobia in your eyes? If they ignore it irl and pursue them anyway I would agree but in their fantasy? It's not much different than to imagine yourself with a celebrity, even a dead one, what is in reality impossible isn't so in fantasy. Vic is a triple threat (most likely gay/celebrity/dead), like I ignore much more than him being gay for my little fantasies to work. lol

And I don't think making my little stupid posts here on my stupid little blog about how wonderful and hot he was and that I want to be his gf is on the same level than actually writing fanfiction about him, publishing that and letting professional actors perform it and presenting it to an audience. What basically is what the series and play did.

It just happens that both authors of these works are gay and what confuses/annoys me about that is that when they incorporate Vic in their work they have the chance to have great gay rep by showing Vic as the truly beloved, charming, intelligent, talented man he was with the actual struggles he had but they have both opted for stereotypes and fatphobia. At least in my eyes I think that says something about the mindest of the authors and yeah, doesn't make me a fan.

The only aspect in which I have questioned myself often if my own homophobia was at play was for how long I have clung to the threads that Vic was ace/bi/pan and not gay. I have not been able to fully decide yet because I do think that there are enough clues that have pointed in those directions and I do think that other queer identities get often ignored and were, especially back then, thrown under the gay umbrella. Only when I actually was able to talk to gay men who knew Vic I was certain that he was into men and any other dates/girlfriends were most likely beards or genuine early attempts at heterosexuality. I could have been more "the most obvious answer is probably the right one" and accepted it sooner. I'm sure my crush on him was to blame for that. But I have never kept my findings secret and have written in posts that I had changed my mind about his sexuality now. I think if I had been intentionally homophobic I would have not shared my findings and kept people on here in the dark.

So yeah, I don't agree with you. If anyone else actually has a nuanced opinion how my blogging about Vic might be homophobic please send it but I don't think these points are correct.

#alvadee's shit

0 notes

shippingk8 · 6 years

Text

RWBY Rundown, Episode 8 Volume 5

Anonymous

If you have seen it: What's your opinion on v5e8? We see that Yang have revealed more on the depth of her feeling for Blake but also Weiss initiating a more proactive role in helping Yang recover. I appreciate Weiss's canon frankness, but I will admit I'd enjoy it more if we got a hint of that jealous dere-dere like your Weiss from recovery.

Jacevi

Hello, it's me again :) Because I love your way of thinking and the way you write, I was curious if you would have some spare time to give us your opinion on the newest episode? Also really really curious what they wanted to represent with the close up on Weiss's fist clenching in that moment?

Ohhoho, so very many opinions and thoughts, to be honest. So without further ado, here is the rundown.

Weiss and Yang talk

Okay, wow. Let’s just get the giddiness from the sheer amount of Freezerburn moments in the last 4 episodes out of the way. Like YOWZA! (I think I’m gonna need to make another theory post just from everything that has happened in the last 3 episodes alone!) *rolls eyes* That said, I know that Freezerburn is still really unlikely to happen, so I will save the rest of my fan freak out for another post.

Weiss was such a major and important character this episode. It has been awesome to see Weiss shown as such an influential and rounded character this season. From the two dimensional ice queen of Volume 1 to the heart that is trying to keep their ‘family’ together in Volume 5 it has been really cool to see her character develop. I am very interested to see if this same level of help gets extended to all of her team members, or if there is something a little special about Yang in particular. On those opening comments let me elaborate.

The trend of Weiss and Yang ending up spending time together has been quite interesting to me, not just as a freezerburn shipper, but as writer. They are both so opposite, yet extremely similar, and I loved that about this episode. Yang doesn’t see how Weiss could possibly relate to her and yet Weiss explains just that.

She shares that just because she has a nuclear family, that doesn’t mean it is a good family. And it is because of that, that her team/friends have become her surrogate family. I thought this was awesome for multiple reasons. 1) It makes Weiss more real and multi-dimensional. 2) It helps fill in with more detail as to why she was an ice queen to start. 3) It was relatable as hell. Coming from a very similar family situation I just felt for Weiss and understood that need to make family when your own isn’t great. 4) You can see that telling Yang this wasn’t easy, but Weiss did it anyhow because she knew that it was what Yang needed to hear.

Now that said I did find a couple of things to be odd or interesting choices on the writers’ part. I thought it was a little curious that Weiss was the one to have this talk with Yang and not Ruby (more on that below). And it was a bit weird that Weiss said that she and Yang weren’t close, I am attributing this to her own insecurities, but (in my opinion) given how often the have been paired together in the past as well as the fact that she literally glomped Yang when she saw her again makes that sort of a weird thing to say. @toomuchfreetyme2 disagrees, as my editor says that Weiss is comparatively the least close with Yang of the group, ie Ruby is her sister and Weiss is her battle partner. Buuuuut I don’t like that argument, so I’m choosing to ignoring it. (Lol, I’m so getting yelled at later for that comment. Worth it~) And lastly, the hand gesture while Weiss is talking about Blake was an interesting and super confusing choice.

In my opinion that gesture was pretty really vague, and could have been interpreted a ton of ways. For instance, (in order from most to least likely) it could have been her secretly being mad at Blake for leaving too, but not saying it out loud because she didn’t think that was what Yang needed to hear right then. It could have been her worried about how things will go when Blake does come back. It could have been interpreted as her knowing that the closeness that she shares with Yang will be gone when Blake comes back. It could have been her knowing that she will have to be the bigger person, and put her feeling for Yang aside when Blake comes back. It could even have been interpreted as her having secret feelings for Blake. (Seriously if that is true then the show will have fallen into becoming an anime about Blake’s harem.)

Given just how vague and secretive this show can be I felt extra frustrated about the ambiguity of that gesture, because it was intentionally animated (meaning it was important) but also very unclear as to what it actually meant. I am hoping that it meant that she was holding onto some anger at Blake, because otherwise I feel like it is odd for her to be soooo supportive of Blake running away and leaving them. Especially considering that she got mad at Blake for not trusting or leaving the team more than once before The Fall. I also felt that it did undercut the validity of Yang’s feelings of being abandon a bit to not have Weiss at least acknowledge that she does have the right to feel hurt. *shrug* Overall props to the Weiss scene, it gave me the feels.

Ruby

I think it is significant that it was Weiss that talked to Yang and not Ruby. Of everyone, Ruby got to see more than anyone how much Yang was effected by The Fall. In my opinion I think it shows Ruby’s lack of experience as a lead and still prevalent immaturity. She has yet to acknowledge that Yang isn’t okay, whereas Weiss has on three distinct occasions. (In the bandit camp, when she speaks for Yang during the conversation with Oscar/Oz, and when she talks to Yang in this episode)

At this point it seems that team RNJR is happy accepting that Yang is fine. Which I could forgive from Nora, Jaune, and Ren, but not from Ruby. It is her sister, she felt that distance that was put between them from everything that happened to Yang, and she saw just how broken Yang became before she left. I get that they all just want to have a fun at ease night once they are all back together, but it is troubling to me that Ruby hasn’t reached out to her sister or at the very least been shown through body language or context to know that Yang ISN’T okay.

This mixed with all that we have learned about Ozpin makes me question if Ruby really is ready or supposed to be a leader, or if she was just put in the position because she is “special,” like her mother. Now, don’t get me wrong, I do think Ruby can become a great leader. She already has that paragon/inspirational touch, but I think she is still too young to have the wisdom to lead her team emotionally and does lack a level of maturity needed to be a good leader. Ruby has always been the one to go off and take care of things herself, being a rogue agent isn’t really a good quality for leadership. From what I have seem in volume 4 and 5 I think that that will be where Ruby’s character arc will grow next. Her maturing, gaining some more confidence, and figuring out how to be a true leader.

Blake and Illia

Sigh… If Illia is the only queer character on the show I am going to be epically pissed. Not even kidding a little bit.

Not because she is a bad character, but because her storyline got botched. The premise of her character was pretty solid to start. She was in the White Fang because her parents were dead and no one cared because they were faunus. She did seemed a tiny bit too willing to sacrifice everything for the cause, but I blame that feeling on a lack of a more fleshed out back story. I’m sure there are lots of other little stories and instances that got her to where she is right now, but it really sucks that we don’t/didn’t get any of that.

She was an interesting and important character, because she was the most relatable member of the White Fang and she was still struggling with the morality of taking her actions all the way. Which was good and very important for building empathy with the audience and throwing doubt in that ‘no one is completely evil’ sort of way.

But then they went and messed things up on sooooo many levels. First off, because of how and when Illia confessed her feelings most people are going to think that she is only acting like such a sacrificing member of the White Fang, ‘because she is in love with Blake.’ Which ends up obliterating the relevance of her back story and her actions being based on the fact that her family is dead. Second, *shakes fist in anger* could you stop with the vengeful unrequited lesbian trope! I know that wasn’t what they were going for, but that is what most people are going to see. And I can not tell you how unbelievably fed up with the shit writing that gets thrown at the gay community. It is like your options for a gay character are either to be a psycho, killed off after getting together, or be a psycho and killed off. Negative representation is not good representation!

(Deep breaths~)

Okay, moving on!

Blake

I was going to write something about Blake and her development, but I think I will save that for another time.

Blake and Adam

This is going to sound weird, but it would make for a better story if it was revealed that Blake and Adam didn’t actually have a relationship.

Here is why:

1) It is a really lame, extra psycho, and terrible message to send if Adam only wants to hurt Blake because she broke up with him. First off, and most important, we do not, I repeat, DO NOT need to be sending men (or anyone) the message that if someone breaks up with you you should go psychotic on them. Second, if Adam’s only motivation for going after Blake on a murder spree is because she broke up with him then that makes his character really lame, ultra one dimensional, and frankly boring. Sure it helps you hate the guy, but if he is going to stick around for more than a volume you should really add some depth and complexity to the situation and by extension the character.

2) If they weren’t actually ever together then it makes Blake look way better. The fact that Adam has turned out to be so violent and unstable has called into question Blake’s judgment in a big way, but if she held back because there was just something that didn’t feel quite right then that would give her character a lot of credit and make her more empathetic and relatable. That sort of hero worship scenario where someone turns out not to be quite who you thought they were has happened to almost everyone. And lastly Blake already has WAY too many love interests. I think it actually gives her character power back if she is the one that is able to say, “No, I choose not to be with you.”

3) It opens his ‘revenge’ story line to be a lot richer if they didn’t date. If it is established that they dated then the vast majority of people will simplify the entire thing to be all about him going crazy for being left. Anything significant that happened between them or any other very real and valid reasons for him wanting to get back at her will then become essentially a moot point for most people. Because, again, most people latch on the the biggest most easy to swallow thing first. For example a great element that could be introduced would be that Adam didn’t actually care that much for Blake emotionally, but wanted to be with her for the recognition that she brought. Adam obviously wanted to be leader of the White Fang, what better leverage than dating and having the support of the daughter of the previous White Fang leader.

Overall I actually did really like the episode, but I do wish that the Illia thing were handled differently. Now my thoughts on Episode 9 are a whole other post and I am really behind, so it will have to wait for after the new chapter gets posted on “Recovery.”

#Blake Belladonna #weiss schnee #yang xiao long #freezerburn #rwby theory #rwby volume 5 #here is my very long opinion #opinions #writing theory

14 notes · View notes

viktuurificwriters · 7 years

Text

Getting to Know Reiya

AO3 profile

Tumblr

If you’ve been in the Yuri on Ice fandom for a long time now, then I bet you’ve already heard of Reiya. She is the author of the highly acclaimed Rivals series on AO3. The series’ first fic, entitled Until my Feet Bleed and my Heart Aches, is the YOI fic with the most number of kudos and hits.

Reiya ( @kazliin ) even has her own group of dedicated readers, who form a sub-fandom within the YOI fandom. Her blog is proof of that–being comprised of replies to the variety of asks she receives daily, different posts about the Top Ten’s of Yuuri and of Viktor in the Rivals world, reblogs of different fanarts and fanvids about her stories, and a whole lot more.

Any fan of Reiya would take pleasure in scrolling down her blog. From it, they can know some exclusive facts about her writings, like where she gets ideas, which of the two fics in the series was harder for her to write, and others. But with the plenty of asks Reiya answers each week, such facts get buried away in her blog and could never be seen again (unless you’ve decided to devote yourself in searching through each of the pages, which would probably take hours.)

Therefore, this post has been made to compile some of the basic stuff that everyone needs to know about their favorite writer. Learn more about Reiya and her works right under the cut.

Even though Reiya writes fanfics about YOI, she admits that she doesn’t really watch anime. She became interested in Yuri on Ice when she kept seeing it on her dashboard around episode two or three. She was also curious about it being a figure skating anime because, as a child, she used to dream of becoming a figure skater herself.

Before YOI, Reiya used to write for the Marvel fandom. She didn’t write a fic for seven months after her last Marvel fic due to writer’s block, but then she found Yuri on Ice and it gave her the inspiration she needed to write again.

“The source material is wonderful and there's so much potential in it for both canon verse fics and AUs,” says Reiya. “And as a member of the LGBT community, it was so wonderful to finally see a canon, healthy, happy queer couple, so it gave me a lot of inspiration to write.”

As soon as Reiya started watching YOI, she kept imagining different scenarios to put the characters in, which she thinks is a good precursor to starting a fic. Yuri on Ice was also a new fandom, with new material coming out each week–getting reader response and feedback was very high.

“Inspiration to write is so heavily based on getting response for what you do,” Reiya adds. “Being in a big fandom like YOI and having so many people being enthusiastic over my fic really pushed me to keep writing.”

And so, Reiya started writing what turned out to be the most popular YOI fic ever.

In coming up for the idea of UMFB&MHA, Reiya was really interested in the challenge of turning a fluffy and loving couple into rivals and in an enemies-to-lovers situation.

“The middle came first, then the beginning with how the whole rivalry started and then the doping scandal and then end,” she says. “I think I dreamed up the whole thing over the course of about a week and then finally sat down to plot it all out properly.”

Her biggest challenge in planning out the fic was figuring what Viktor could do to make Yuuri hate him. She knew that it should never be malicious on Viktor’s part. Viktor can be insensitive at times and speaks before he thinks in canon, but at heart, he’s never intentionally cruel. Eventually, Reiya settled on making Viktor say something tactless that he thought was helping, but actually cut Yuuri really deeply.

“We know from the other characters saying it that Yuuri really hates losing and he's a very determined character who rises well when he's challenged, like with Yurio during the Onsen on Ice,” answers Reiya when asked if she can see Canon Yuuri as the kind of person who’d resent someone for so long even though he had just been a kid when he felt insulted. “So I think the seed is there if something happened to him in his formative years to send him sown a different path.”

In the fic, Yuuri was insulted by Viktor when he was an insecure twelve-year old. According to Reiya, he took the insult far worse than an adult Yuuri would and it really shaped him. “The insult also grows with him over the fic,” she explains. “When he thinks back on what Viktor said, it becomes worse and more hurtful because his mind is distorting the memory as he grows older.”

When Reiya writes, she has to do it in big chunks. She doesn’t like writing only a little for an hour and a half and then stop. She needs to sit down on a weekend and write for ten hours straight. She prefers getting into the zone when she writes, so she needs to be in a peaceful place with a single song looped playing for hours in the background in order to help her focus.

Ten hours is the maximum time she allots on a weekend, but often, if the deadline for the next chapter was approaching, she’d come back home from university on a day she had reserved for writing at five and then writes until midnight, with only a break for a dinner.

“Since I take two weeks to write a chapter and maybe 30-50 hours, it means I can do it all in big chunks with free days to live my life rather than writing non-stop all the time,” says Reiya.

Once Reiya is in the writing zone, everything else is easy. But getting in that zone is what’s difficult. Sometimes she can spend hours writing and not be able to focus at all that she can’t make the words flow.

“Before chapter 14, my exams were approaching and I was studying all the time and not writing, so the day before I said I'd post the chapter, I still had a huge chunk to write,” she shares. “I pulled an all-nighter to finish because people were so excited for the next chapter and I didn't want to let them down!”

The pressure of her fans has been hard on Reiya, but she finds that she usually works well under it. The expectations terrify but also motivate her at the same time.

Reiya loves writing, but sometimes it can be very exhausting. She finds it very difficult to write the sex scenes in her fics. Before the Rivals series, she had never written a sex scene so it was great exercise in learning how to write them. Even then, she still struggles, especially now with the second fic in her series, entitled Of Bright Stars and Burning Hearts, where she has to rewrite all the sex scenes from UMFB&MHA in Viktor’s POV.

In terms of emotional writing, the hardest scene for her to write was first part of the third chapter of OBS&BH. Viktor is a very optimistic character and it was very hard for Reiya to put him in a position where that optimism gets crushed.

The responses of people who read Reiya’s fic is what keeps her writing. She is incredibly grateful and lucky to have so many people enjoying her fic. The pressure and the expectations may be terrifying, but she thinks it's worth it.

Reiya’s advice for aspiring writers:

(The italicized text are Reiya’s exact words, but with minor errors corrected.)

Don’t compare yourselves to the big fics and don't write what you're not comfortable with. Almost all the big fics in any fandom were written right at the beginning when popularity is highest and when people read the fics with the most kudos first. Once a fic is on the first page it's very difficult to knock it down or get another fic up there instead. It happens in every fandom. If you come into a fandom later and write, don't feel down by comparing yourself to fics like that. Popularity doesn't necessarily mean it's the best fic out there, and just because your fic isn't the most popular, it doesn't mean it isn't good. I know it seems patronizing of me to say that, all things considered, but YOI isn't my first fandom and I know how hard it can be when you feel like people care so much more about other fics than yours. I've deleted or stopped fics before because I felt like no one cared. But you know what? People do and you should always write what you want to write regardless of what anyone else is doing. You never know, to someone out there, your fic might make their day.

As for not writing what you’re not comfortable with, don’t be pressured into writing something just because all the other fics are like that or people want it. If you’re not comfortable with writing sex scenes, then don’t write them. If someone wants your fic to go in a certain direction and you’re not sure about it, don’t do it just to please someone else. Write for yourself first and everyone else second.

I think a lot of writers (and I include myself in this) can get caught up comparing themselves to other people and trying to please everyone which is never a good way to go.

[Bonus] Random Facts about Reiya:

(The italicized text are Reiya’s exact words, but with minor errors corrected.)

1. Favorite Viktuuri Headcanons

I love the idea that Yuuri can hold his alcohol really well and Viktor can't! I also love the hc that they both learn each other's languages and end up speaking a weird mash of Japanese and Russian all the time. I also love most sappy romantic hc about them once they're living together in St Petersburg because I'm a sappy romantic at heart.

I also love headcanons about them being the worst rivals ever now that they're both competing. Like, they're supposed to be serious competition but they can't stop making eyes at each other and teasing each other all the time during competitions

2. Favorite YOI song

Yuri on Ice

3. Favorite YOI scene

The proposal scene because it's so atmospheric or the kiss scene because that was the moment when I could finally scream “I fucking said it was going to become canon! I CALLED IT PEOPLE.”

4. Favorite color

Blue

5. Waffles or pancakes?

Pancakes

6. Ice cream – Chocolate or vanilla?

Chocolate

7. Viktor or Yuuri?

How dare you try and make me choose?

8. Pineapples on pizza or not?

I'm a normal human being, so no.

9. Coffee or tea?

Coffee. There's no blood in my veins; there is only caffeine.

10. Scrambled eggs or sunny side up?

Sunny side up

319 notes · View notes