#the b in b team stands for best friends!!!

[toasttt11]

flirting

December 21, 2022

The Sequin’s were the ones hosting the annual dallas stars team holiday party this year and Livia had came over earlier to help them finish setting up and then she got ready with Kate.

Kate begged Livia to let her straighten her hair and Livia reluctantly agreed as she usually doesn’t care enough and just lets her hair air dry into her natural waves.

Kate put some black eyeliner on Livia’s water line and it really made Livia’s green eyes pop. Kate had picked out an outfit for Livia who agreed and let Kate buy it for her.

Livia put on the pair of leather pants that were oddly comfortable and a really cozy green sweater that was the same colors as her eyes and a pair of black heeled boots.

Livia walked out of the bathroom and saw Kate fully ready in her red plaid dress, Livia did a little spin as Kate gasped and smiled.

“Liv you look beautiful!” Kate didn’t think Livia could get more beautiful but she definitely wrong.

The girls must of taken a bit because by the time the two walked down the stairs quite a few of the players and some of their families were there already.

Wyatt looked up at the stairs and felt his breath catch, Livia was glowing and her eyes were sparking brightly, Wyatt has always loved anything green on Livia as he always says it’s her color especially with the way it makes not only her eyes pop but her freckles too.

Wyatt didn’t get a chance to talk to Livia as the Finn’s stole her before he could.

Wyatt stayed by Ty’s side but his eyes kept staying on Livia and was completely distracted by her.

“Dude.” Ty gave him a shove making Wyatt snap his attention back to Ty.

“What?” Wyatt asked cluelessly.

“Go to Drysy.” Ty titled his head to Livia, he knew he wouldn’t get an actual conversation with Wyatt when Wyatt is to focused on Livia.

Wyatt just nodded not even arguing and saw Livia walking about from the group and Wyatt watched as she walked by the snack table picking up a cookie before walking down the hallway. Wyatt quickly followed and saw her standing outside on the balcony.

He closes the door behind him and the click made Livia quickly turn around.

“Wy.” Livia breathed out smiling at her best friend and the guy she realized she’s been in love with for years.

“Hi Livvy.” Wyatt’s smiled back and walked over to her, he gently brushed back a strand of hair behind her hair, “Did i tell you look absolutely beautiful tonight.” Wyatt looked at her with a smile.

“Just tonight?” Livia gently teased back and leaned into his hand that was still resting on her cheek.

“No.” Wyatt shook his head, “You look absolutely beautiful always.” Wyatt smiled softly gently caressing her cheek.

Livia looked at him and then blinked rapidly realizing something, “Are you flirting with me?” Livia titled her head curiously.

“I have been for years Livvy, thanks for noticing.” Wyatt gently quipped back with a soft smirk.

“Years?” Livia breathed out her eyes widening realizing all those times people told Wyatt liked her they were right.

“You didn’t know?” Wyatt frowned in confusion having figured Livia knew his feelings for her and was just being polite by not saying anything because she did not feel the same.

“No!” Livia quickly spluttered out, She gently grabbed his other hand, “I did not know Wy.” She reassured him not wanting him to think she knew for years and did not ever say anything.

“Oh.” Wyatt breathed out feeling hopeful once more, “Oh.” Wyatt smiled softly.

“Oh?” Livia repeated back.

“So since you know now that i have had feelings for you for years, what are you thinking?” Wyatt whispered to her as he leaned closer to her.

Livia let out a nervous breath and dryly swallowed, “I’m thinking i would really like to kiss my boyfriend?” Livia nervously whispered back hoping she didn’t mess everything up because she was the bold one for once.

Wyatt let out a relieved breath smiling brightly, “Well your boyfriend would really like to kiss you too.” Wyatt gently whispered leaning closer till their noses gently brushed against together and when he saw her nod he gently pressed his lips finally to hers.

Wyatt practically melted as he finally kissed her and cupped the back of her head pulling her closer to him.

They could feel each other’s wide smiles against each other’s lips as they tried to kiss longer but both pulled away giggling happily.

“You’re my girlfriend.” Wyatt whispered in disbelief and awe that he was finally getting his girl.

Livia giggled nodding and she was smiling so wide her nose was all scrunched and Wyatt couldn’t help but lean back down pressing a long kiss to her lips.

“Oh!” Jake blinked in shock as Jason and him walked onto the balcony and saw the two younger ones kissing each other.

Wyatt and Livia both pulled apart and Livia quickly hid her face in Wyatt’s chest.

“Damn it Roope won the bet.” Jason cursed shaking his head.

“What bet?” Wyatt narrowed his eyes at the two.

“Uhhhh the bet when you two finally get together.” Jake awkwardly told them, getting two dark glares from both of sunshine’s of the team.

The team had made a bet months ago and almost every single player had picked a timeframe when they would get together and of course Roope won.

Wyatt wrapped an arm around her waist and gently guided her off the balcony past the other two as they headed back to the living room seeing everyone was sitting around the couches together.

“Roope won.” Jason groaned dramatically as Jake and him followed Livia and Wyatt back into the living room.

Roope just simply smirked because he had a feeling how long it would take from knowing Livia pretty well but it was glad that Livia and Wyatt finally confessed especially because of the happy smile on her face.

“Johnny boy!” Tyler cheered thinking Wyatt would never make a move, “Well done.” He gave the two a wink.

Jamie and Joe both shared a look glad the kids are finally together.

“Thank god!” Ty let out a groan of relief he could not watch the two pine after each other any longer.

“About time.” Thomas commented.

Livia blushed even brighter and hide her face back in Wyatt’s chest and Wyatt fondly smiled and his arm tightened around her waist.

Wyatt gently led Livia over to the open spot on the couch and plopped down first and Livia quickly sat down next to him resting her head on his shoulder and Wyatt proudly wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

#liviadrysdaleau #ld4 #wyatt johnston x oc #wyatt johnston #jamie drysdale x oc #jamie drysdale #luke hughes #luke hughes x oc #jack hughes x oc #jack hughes #quinn hughes x oc #quinn hughes #trevor zegras #trevor zegras x oc #anaheim ducks #mason mctavish #philadelphia flyers #dallas stars #jake oettinger #roope hintz #miro heiskanen #ty dellandrea #jason robertson #thomas harley #logan stankoven #tyler seguin #jamie benn #nhl x oc #nhl au #joe pavelski

[turrondeluxe]

always happy about the fact that in 2012, mikey often asked donnie questions if he didn't understand something and donnie always answered no matter what

this can be seen in a bunch of episodes but my favorite example of it it's the one in half shell heroes where mikey is extremely excited to be in the museums and is the one actively asking donnie questions about the exhibits they saw and also actively listening to donnie's explanation (before raph got silly lmao). he was very excited to learn!!!

And while it's true that mikey would lose interest quite fast if the explanation got too lengthy with too many technical terms, it doesn't change the fact that he does retain the info donnie is always rambling on about different things!!! (even if mikey himself doesn't notice he's doing it lol) and also i find it very sweet that no matter if donnie himself got annoyed, donnie would always answer the questions. no matter what. he would always try to explain if he didn't understand something

This is prob because mikey is the one brother who is often seeking out donnie to pass time around him Meaning that donnie might have used mikey as his rubber ducky whenever mikey hangs out with him while he's working (explained him a lot of his experiments and theories while trying to solve them himself and in this way mikey also learnt in the process WHILE spending time with his brother! win win!)

it also helps donnie because accompanies him while not letting him get lonely in his lab 24/7, sometimes explaining things to someone makes it better to understand it yourself AND it's shown in the comics that donnie is quite used to his brothers just Living as background noise and literally cannot function without it lmao

They are literally the two smart kids in the family even if none of them notice it and it's all because mikey looks up to his brother and is like an sponge with donnie around. donnie is actively teaching mikey and mikey is learning! even if they have no idea they are doing it

#fer silly twt rambling #i wasnt going to post it here but i think yall will like this one lol #STEM KIDS!! #they mean so much to me #literally is so important to me that donnie; if not stressed the fuck out by a lot of things going on; would always explain calmly to mikey #thats his only little brother!!! hes thoughts are prob 'if mikey asks i must answer. im such a cool older bro' #makes my heart warm with joy #ALSO #mikey looks up to don and wants to do the same things as don does based on how he mimics him in that one ep where donnie is silly goofy #i need an ep of 2012 b team visiting museums and being happy and excited about learning #the b in b team stands for best friends!!! #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #tmnt mikey #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt donnie #tmnt donatello

[kithtaehyung]

broken, pt. 2 (3tan) (m) | myg

title: broken (pt. 2) pairing: 3tan!yoongi x reader(f) series:masterlist | three tangerines | fireworks | house party | basketball | stay | sidewalk talk | friends | dalo | like that | anytime | sundress season | yoongi’s interlude | forfeit | flutter | video call | busted | broken (pt. 1) rating/genre: m (18+) ; angst , fluff , smut ; brother’s best friend au, implied age gap au summary: the championship game lights up... and everything goes down. note: not too much to say other than thank you. this part is definitely another very, very close one to my heart. please buckle up and enjoy the ride. warnings: [spice warnings under the cut] language, angst, tension, alcohol mention & consumption, fights, basketball!yoongi🧍‍♀️, cocky!yoongi, jimin😳, tense situations, did i say angst?, long hair yoongi, crying, bro😀, reader is a real one i don’t make the rules, arguments, the chains stay on(???), …bad boy yoongi😀👍, saying softhours puts some of this lightly, bro🥲, blood/wound mentions, hurt/comfort, there’s just a lot in here y’all idek, taehyung being the best ever, …angst. drop date: february 9th, 2024, 10:37pm est word count: 17.7k my god

smut warnings: cursing, choking, light slapping, breast play, angry s*x a ha ha, crying, multiple explicit scenes y'all istg don't perceive me lol, c*nt slapping, penetrative s*x, brat!reader, protected s*x, edging, consent king ofc :), rough s*x, b*cksh*ts and a lot of them, ...unprotected s*x (yeah it's here and y'all better be responsible or so help me!!!), f*ngering, or*l (m/f rec), brat tamer!3tan yoongi!!!, reader loses themselves for a sec, but yoongi is a king, pain k*nk whewwww, kissing, so much kissing lmfao, c*m play, slight bond*ge (yoongi hands), spanking, aftercare ofc :'))

-

-

There’s no way.

How the fuck is he here? When did that horrible excuse of a guy even join a team? Had he been playing intramurals this whole time? 

“No fuckin’ way.”

Your eyes find your brother standing rigid at your side, wrists tensed to hell and shoulders spiked. Did he not know he was playing, either? Judging by his smoldering question, you’re going to guess he wasn’t aware. 

“Were they always on this team?” 

“No.”

“I don’t remember them being on any teams.”

They? Them? So they recognize more from the court on that day you try to not think about. Shifting your vision, you start gauge reactions under sounds of the growing crowd. 

It’s Yoongi that looks at you first, eyes lowering to the hand you still have on your arm damn it you should be okay about that night already. But you can’t seem to let your limb go, your fingers covering it in a weak attempt at protection and resilience. 

The blaze in his eyes makes you shake. Even as you swallow your pleas for everyone to just go home, he doesn’t look away. Instead, he walks over to stand in front of your knees, motioning for you to scoot over one so he can take the end seat.

Normally, you would slightly question why he wouldn’t just sit next to you. But this time, you’re hyper aware of what he’s doing—and why. It’s so obvious that you wanna reach out and grip his sweaty hand. 

Yoongi absolutely sat there to shield you.

And your heart burns and burns.

If only he could do more, be more, show more. Because with a rattled ego and tainted mind, you’re already yearning for his touch, wanting him to whisk you out of here and bring you back to the comfort of his home—just like he did that night. 

God, he makes you dizzy doing absolutely nothing. 

“What’s the plan,” he asks, eyes on the court and palms between his knees.

“Dunno yet.” Your brother shakes his head before looking back, eyes narrowing at the laughs on the other bench. “But I might get my ass thrown out if we—”

“Play.” 

Immediately, all three of them snap their heads your way. Fuck, your arm is still… 

One person cannot have this hold on you. There’s no way you’re going to let him control your every waking moment, and your determination bubbles into your commands. “Play the game and beat his ass,” you seethe, holding yourself together and aiming daggers everywhere. “Just make it quick.” 

Yoongi gives you a look before Jimin snags him with an eyebrow raise. 

“And you’re paying me double.” 

Looking at the man beside you, it’s almost comforting seeing his attention fully on your face. If it weren’t for your ghost on the other side of the scoring table and your brother standing there, you wouldn’t hesitate to kiss him. 

But you only nod, getting a huff and a lopsided curve in response before you watch him lock eyes with your brother, “What do you wanna do?” 

After a long, resigned sigh, your sibling finally relents, “Fuck this shit up.” 

Good. Yes. This is what you want—for you and them. “Exactly.” 

Scanning around the tight circle, you notice that you have everyone’s attention. 

But one person seems to send a question without any words at all. In kind, you answer the same way, wings battering your stomach when all of them send thunder to the court with lightning in their eyes.

Yoongi scoffs through a slant, carrying the air of someone you never want to mess with in your fucking life. “The fuckin’ nerve.” 

Jimin hums, sliding a finger along his flexed to hell jaw. “Bold,” he adds. And his voice drop sends shivers when he turns to you,

“Don’t worry, love.” 

You stare.

“This will be over soon.” 

-

-

The game is… just a game. For now.

No one’s taunted hard other than a few smirks and winks, and right now it seems as if both teams are just being competitive more than antagonistic. Which relaxes you to the point where you’re cheering from the bench with the other players—and their coach that arrived late—jumping and yelling and clapping when things go in their favor.

Your brother’s slamming down dunks. Jimin’s been playing amazing defense with his quick reflexes and high stamina.

And Yoongi? Has gotten sickeningly sharp. All those late nights at the rec center are paying off in this championship and, when he scores a hard shot, the pride you feel launches you to your feet. 

“Nice job, b—” Oh fuck you almost shout something that should never be public knowledge. Holding your tongue, you quickly switch it up with a hasty, “Let’s go!” 

That was close. Way too close. 

Get it together. 

But you cannot help it right now. Seeing Yoongi facing off against the man you both wanna square up against? And making it look easy? The fluttering you feel in your belly grows double. Triple. Tenfold. His gestures, the way he acts like it’s nothing, his shrugs at their failed attempts to stop him—everything’s making you scratch proverbial walls and kick bench chairs. 

And it’s not just him—the whole team has been playing excellently. Each play seems intentional; every pass and movement is strategic. If you didn’t know this was a casual rec game, you would think they’re gunning for a real, prestigious trophy. 

However. 

When it’s starting to be very clear who the better squad is, that’s when things start getting more than tense. 

On a foul call, both sides start getting in each others’ faces. And you peg that as normal until someone on your team gets shoved and your brother immediately gets between the action. 

Both you and the coach shoot up from your seats. 

Shit, shit, shit. If there’s one thing your older sibling’s gonna do in this game, it’ll be finding any excuse to deck that man in the face. And once that happens, there’s no telling how many injuries are gonna walk off polished floors.

Thankfully, everyone separates without a ruckus, and timeout is called on your side. The crowd starts to yell in favor of either team, and that’s when you notice that Taehyung has been joined by Shiv and your friends. From the looks of things, all five of them are laser focused on you. 

You hold a quick thumbs-up before you’re covered by hot and sweaty men huddling around the bench. And you immediately agree with their coach when he barks, 

“I need you all to calm down.” 

“No can do, coach.” 

“Not if they aren’t.” 

Shit. All of them look fucking livid, not giving any shits whatsoever if they’re willing to talk back to their leader. What’s really been happening on the court? Has it been even more tense than you perceived? 

Oblivious to the context behind this matchup, their coach keeps yelling, “Look, I don’t give a shit if you have something to settle. Play the game and leave it on the floor. Understood?” When there’s charged silence, he yells it even louder. 

And a smattering of agreement comes out before all of you hear an even bigger yelling session booming from the other bench. When you look over, it’s quickly noticeable that they’re getting reamed over there, too. 

Jimin watches before speaking, and it seems like your coach’s pleas fell on deaf ears, “Fifteen went for my legs.” 

“Saw that. Let’s switch cus he can’t guard me.” 

“K.” Park swivels his head to address someone else. “You good to keep playing?” 

Your brother responds with a nod, wiping his never-ending sweat. “Yeah, I’m good.” 

Huh. Even though you know he’s mad, the man seems… Calm. Eerily calm. It’s reminding you of the way he acted after you came home from Yoongi’s. 

And you don’t like it one bit. 

But the timeout is over, and both teams eye each other on their walk back onto the court. As it continues, the gym erupts into life again, with a bit of back and forth shots racking the scoreboard up. 

And Yoongi keeps scoring. And scoring. And scoring. 

Which lands him in a bit of trouble when the same idiot from Dalo pushes him during a layup. After he manages to make the shot, Yoongi immediately flicks him off—which gets a whistle blown. Which also means he has to sit on the bench for a second because his coach is pissed. 

Ignoring the scathing remarks being thrown, he dumps himself next to you. And you immediately feel the heat roll off of him in waves, trying hard to focus on the game. “Don’t be stupid,” you jut out. 

“What?” 

“Don’t be stupid. These guys aren’t worth it.” 

“After what he did to you?” 

The way those words leave his mouth ice you over, flares spiraling through every fiber of your being. Your reaction is so visceral that you can barely get your response out, “Yeah, but…” 

Leaning on his knees, Yoongi wipes his forehead with a crinkled to hell jersey, excess sweat pinging onto his sneakers. The crowd is loud and the buzzers even louder, but they aren’t enough to drown out his bite,

“I can’t let that shit go.” 

“Yoongi.” 

“Sorry, doll.” 

“Please just—” 

Yoongi leaves the bench before you can finish, and you whip your head in a rush, hands jutting out in a desperate attempt to hold him back. 

Only for him to be just out of reach. 

-

-

After halftime, it’s a whole different game. 

From an outside perspective, it’s as if everyone was using the first half to sniff each other out, circling around each other before deciding how and when to go in for the kill. 

And Yoongi isn’t the only one that you’re starting to worry about. Jimin, your brother, and even Rohan and the other guys are on edge, playing hard and doing everything they can to keep their scoring lead. 

Both you and their coach know you can’t stop whatever’s going on out there. And you’re starting to feel yourself getting angry at how your brother and them are egging the guys on. 

Why are they taunting? What the hell is making them so bent on making the other team pissed? Yes, all that went down with you, but nothing else had happened since then. And they clearly aren’t listening to anyone telling them to calm down.

If they end up starting shit you are going to—the fuck! 

Yoongi gets straight shoved again as he goes for a layup, and you shoot up in your chair as he hits the back wall with a thud. While the players at your side are yelling and everyone on the court starts grouping in shouts, you stay rigid, solely watching Yoongi eye his attacker—the same idiot from Dalo.

Fuck everything, you wanna rush into the fray and throw hands yourself because that looked painful.

The only thing that’s stopping you is the chilling fact that Yoongi is… Grinning. 

Wiping his curved lips, he waits while the refs break up the squabble, still looking triumphant as he walks to the line to shoot his free throws. When both of them are made, he stares directly at your assaulter—as you finally call it like it is—and doesn’t stop even when the coward looks away.

A whistle blows, and the game continues to be close. Too close, too close, too close. A couple more timeouts let you see just how laser-focused everyone is, and you’re a little shaken when it feels like they forgot you were even occupying their bench. 

What the hell is being said on the court? Even Jimin is brimming with anger. 

But after a few back and forths, Yoongi passes to your brother for a hard dunk, basket ringing from his throwdown and shaking when he lands. 

Thank god. Those points are enough. They’re gonna win. 

All the pent up anxiety you’ve harbored all game releases as everyone starts cheering, and your pride soars as your boys stare down their opponents while the clock winds down.

It’s over. The game is over, nothing too serious happened, and you can all go the fuck home to eat dinner and celebrate. 

Your eyes catch Yoongi throwing a rudely lopsided curve across the court. Even when Jimin comes up to push him back in excitement, his expression doesn’t change. 

And you find that wildly, unfathomably attractive. 

Then, as it goes, your brother comes up and they all share quick daps, eyes ablaze and not letting the losers out of their sight. 

Well. All of them are infamous for a reason. You would guess their energy altogether certainly contributes to that. Because the aura you feel oozing from them fills the gymnasium all the way up to your knees. 

And the sigh you let out mingles with their coach’s shake of his head.

-

-

Things are still tense as they all shake hands—or at least offer hands to shake—with the other team. The atmosphere is even a little iced when they receive their trophy. 

But the way you’re currently being surrounded as your guys converse hides you from plain sight, so you feel heavily protected. Even Jimin, who’s usually cheerful even when exhausted, wields sharp eyes as he keeps glancing over his shoulder. 

Honestly? You wouldn’t know what to do without them. Both your brother and all his friends, good pasts or not, are great people. They didn’t need to shield you like this. But they’re doing it anyway, because they won’t give that lowlife another reason or chance to approach you. 

Yeah. Your older sibling knows how to choose his circle.

It’s making you wonder if… 

Nah. 

That’s still too big a reach. 

When it seems like all of them and their cheering squad are gone, everyone starts making their way over to the bleachers—and you’re acutely reminded of what went down under similar looking ones the other night. 

Your shivers are overshadowed by Yuri’s telltale screams to Rohan, “You were so good, baby! Are you okay?”

Reia and Dom shake their heads before focusing on you, the latter being the spokeswoman, “So what was all that for?”

“Don’t ask,” you sigh, knowing exactly what she’s referring to. “I’m just glad they won and that we can go home.”

“You’re not coming to Yuri’s?” Reia asks. “I thought we planned on that, no?”

Ah, shit. Earlier this week, you did make plans with them without really thinking about what day they were gonna fall on. But now you’re so mentally drained that you kinda just wanna go—

“Is anyone else starving? I’m hungry as fuck!” 

Right. Food. Adrenaline made you forget you were starving. Glancing towards your brother, you quickly remind him, “Yeah, me. And you’re paying.”

“Ah, shit, that’s right.” As he lets out a hard groan and deals with Jimin and Yoongi’s comments, your sibling relents, “Alright, where are we going.”

“Up to you,” you shrug, stealing a little look at the man you want to kiss like hell for his performance tonight. 

God, Yoongi’s so handsome. As Jimin leaves his side, he silently wipes his forehead of any excess sweat, hands and shoulders shining in the lights wait wait wait. Hold on. 

Walking over, you toss any care about who notices you out the window. And as he eyes your approach, you murmur with care and concern, “Is your back okay?” 

Blinking once, twice, the man nods. “Yeah, it’s all good.”

“You sure? That looked…”

Of course he decides that now is the perfect time to rake his sweaty locks back. Speaking so low that only you can hear, Yoongi reassures with a fist full of hair, “I’m fine, doll.” 

Motherfucker. 

Pinning down your urge to reach out and smother him, you only breathe relief. And before you move away to put some distance between, you whisper, “Thank you.”

Yoongi looks your way again. “For what?” 

Swallowing what’s left of your anxiety, you sigh. “For not getting into it out there. I was about to get mad as hell, but.. Looks like they were all talk.” 

“Mm.”

Honestly? It’s a miracle. The game’s over without any hitches or brawls? More relief starts blossoming in your chest, prompting a smile to grace your features. “You looked so good out there, by the way. I almost called you ba—”

“What are y’all talking about over there!”

Your mouth snaps shut as soon as you see your brother watching, but Yoongi is quick to fire off an insult, “The way you always take so long to pick something.”

“I picked already!”

“Then let’s go then.”

Laughing, you join the whole crew as you’re all the last ones to walk out. Your friends and Shiv parked in another lot since one side was already full, so you tell them you’ll meet at the restaurant.

Some other teammates decide to join, with jerseys being shucked off as everyone heads out the door. Immediately, body odor swoops into your nose, making you welcome the crisp, fresh air of night. 

Scratch that. You smell oncoming rain. 

Conversations cease, which only leaves the sound confirming your observation: booming, rolling thunder. Stopping at the edge of the gym’s awning, multiple heads turn up at the rumbles, watching lightning crack the sky. 

In front of you, Jimin shifts his head to the side. “Still?” 

And when you look at who he’s asking, you see Yoongi nod. 

Weird. 

But it’s not raining just yet, so all of you make your way into the lot and to your cars. As you do, you check your phone while making your way over, aiming a question at Tae, “You know where we’re going?” 

“Yeah, it’s not far,” he responds, fishing out his own device. “I think we’ve been there before.” 

We? Looks like things are progressing nicely over there. Since you’re lingering behind the guys, you start to take a small jab, “We, huh? Cute.” 

Lips spread as tight as his eyes, Taehyung parries. “Cute? Look who’s talking, miss whipped.” 

“You’re whipped.” 

“No, you.” 

“No, you,” you giggle out, reaching out to tickle Tae’s side and laughing as he flinches away. You chase him for a few seconds before you see his whole body freeze completely, asking a small question before going quiet.  

And when you slowly follow his line of vision, your heart freefalls to your gut, smashing it so hard you feel bile sting the back of your throat. 

The man from Dalo. And all the guys from the court plus some. 

Surround both Jimin’s and your brother’s cars.

Fuck. Oh, fuck, there’s so many of them, standing and waiting and unflinching in the bursts of thunder inching closer and closer what the fuck are you gonna do— 

“Taehyung.”

Your eyes shake. 

“Get her out of here. Now.”

And you’ve never screamed so loud. 

Every word rips out of your mouth before you’re promptly shushed by large fingers, icicles pinging around your heart and holding it down, “Don’t fucking do thi—!” 

To your horror, Tae’s already hauling you back, voice low and firm in your ear, “Come on.” 

“No! What the fuck—” 

“We’re leaving.”

“Please—!”

There are so many of them. So, so many of them. Panic drowns out your words and excess leaks out of your eyes, your own storm preventing you from seeing that your best friend is just as torn apart. 

“Babe, we have to go now.” 

“No, let me go!” 

They’re outnumbered. What if they have weapons? What if the police are called? What if something happens that you aren’t prepared for?

You’re screaming. Curses, their names, or whatever whatever you don’t even know what the fuck you’re saying because your toes are kissing the edge of madness. 

Dragged a good distance away, your yells devolve into incoherency, your nose and eye sockets smashing into Taehyung’s solid forearm so hard it hurts. 

Make it out, make it out, make it out. For the love of everything in the fucking universe and beyond it, make it out alive. 

Some movements and backs straightening are the last things you see before getting pulled around the corner.

And when Yoongi calmly rolls one of his shoulders, you feel a wick of your soul burn out.

Panic. Worry. Panic and more panic. The car ride that Tae paid for is the blurriest muddy water you’ve ever waded through.

Truthfully, you don’t even remember blankets being pulled over your shoulder. Where even are you? Oh, you’re in a bed. Whose bed are you in because this isn’t yours. But what does it matter anyway what does anything matter anyway nothing matters there’s nothing you can do you gotta get up and go back over there get up get up go—

As soon as you yank his bedroom door open, Taehyung is there, holding you back and pushing your frantic energy back inside. “Tae, if you don’t let me—”

“Do what!”

“I’m going back!” Wrestling out of his strong hold, you bolt down his hallway, head clanging as your shoulder bumps into a wall. “We need to go back—”

“Stop!” You hear running as you burst through the living room, whizzing past the glowing television. “We have to stay here—”

No no no. There’s no way you’re staying here when you need to be back at that lot. Who the fuck would call for help if anyone needs it? When they’re gonna need it? Your vision proves so blurry you can’t even find your shoes—

Arms wrap around your waist and you fight back with a scream, “Let me go!”

“Stop and just think for a second—”

“Why aren’t you with me on this, they’re—”

“Dumb as fuck!” 

Your friend’s quick comment is so sharp it cuts your breath. As you still in his firm but comforting hold, you finally stop to breathe. Breathe, breathe, breathe as you’re turned to level a look with his eyes.

Eyes that are red-rimmed and so, so raw. “They’re idiots,” Taehyung grits out. “But they will be alright.” 

From the shake of his voice, you find that neither of you think that for sure. 

“I need to.. To…” Your breaths are ragged, energy spent and head dizzy from your quick exit from his bed. As you come down from your volcanic high, every weight the world places on your back proves too much. 

“You need to relax,” Tae advises, guiding you further back inside. And you don’t speak as he leads you past the couch, past the pictures on his hallway wall, and into the dark of his bedroom.

Maybe it’s over. Right? Maybe someone will answer if you ring them up. “Call. I need to call…” 

“Shh,” he soothes again, walking you backwards away from his door. When the bends of your knees hit his bed, Taehyung lets you down slowly until you’re sitting. “I’ll do it.” 

Brain fried from hyperactivity, you can only nod. 

Your friend steps away to fiddle with his phone, the light illuminating his beautiful features in the night. When he holds it to his ear, this is when you hear rain and the television in the living room, noticing that it’s playing a movie he watches for comfort. 

Shit. He’s going through it just like you are, and yet he’s still finding energy to calm your nerves? What have you even done to deserve him?

Guess you know how to choose your circle, too. 

Going unanswered, Taehyung lowers his hand, thumb rubbing the homescreen before gripping the device hard. 

Both of you are in the same boat. So steer when he can’t do it anymore. Soft but assertive, you rise to your feet, offering your embrace while calling his name, “..Tae.”

When he turns, the man wastes no time in dropping his phone to bring you in close. “It’ll be okay,” he murmurs, and you hear his words on your head but feel the trembles in his chest. “Okay?”

Feeble fingers grab at his soft shirt, and you bury into his scent while soaked and tired eyes shut. 

You want to believe him. You do. You do. 

But hope may be a bitch. 

So you don’t. 

-

-

Forever passes while you both lie still in his bed, with Taehyung holding you close and keeping you subdued with notes of honey and wood. You both try to have conversation, but it’s disjointed and manufactured, so giving up is a group effort. 

You’re about to give up on a lot of things before you both jolt at Tae’s phone vibrating. 

The world shifts quick as you both sit up, the call immediately being accepted and a low greeting whooshing at your side, “Hey.”

With bated breath, you hear Jimin on the line. “Hey.” 

“You okay?”

“Yeah, we’re all alright, but…”

We. We, we, we, all of them thank the fucking world. As your breath is held, Taehyung’s voice is solid, “Say it.”

“My eye is pretty fucked. Yoongi’s face is cut up and he’s got some nasty bruises on his—” 

You don’t even remember yanking the phone to your mouth. “Where is he.”

Jimin audibly pauses on the line before having the audacity to chuckle. Irked and feeling ire bubble back to the surface, you seethe, “This isn’t funny, Park. Where the fuck is he?” 

“With us.” Us. Shit. “In the car.” 

Oh. 

“Your brother’s here, too.” 

“Ah.” That means they’re all there. They’re all heading home. “Am I on speaker.” 

“Umm.. Yeah.” 

As much as you’re relieved they’re all okay, stockpiled anxiety transforms into anger, your limit striking the thundering sky. “Actually, you know what? Good. Now I can say you’re all idiots and immature as fuck.” 

It’s your sibling that responds first. “Hey, wait a damn minute—” 

“I waited long enough!” you scream, ignoring Taehyung’s wide eyes. 

You know you need to relax. But you can’t help what’s happening right now and all you feel is pain. “I know this shit isn’t new to y’all, but really? You didn’t need to do this.” 

“He was gonna—”

“All you had to do was play the game! Why’d you have to make them mad? Do you even know what could’ve happened back there?” Damn it, you weren’t supposed to cry during this part, not when you just want them to know they fucked up. 

And the response is dead silence. Because of course it is. But if they won’t answer you here, they’re gonna answer another, “Just tell me one thing,” you plead. “Is this gonna happen again?” 

That one your brother answers with finality. “They won’t be coming around anymore.” 

Gulping, you give Taehyung a glossy-eyed look before staring at his lit screen again. Trying not to let your voice waver, you accept his response, “Okay… Are you okay?” 

“Me? Yeah, the hits I took were weak as fuck. I’ll get home soon so if you wanna order in tonight we can.” 

“Fuck that.” 

“Huh?” 

What an idiot. “Bro, you don’t even know how fucking mad I am,” you accuse through gritted teeth. There’s no way in hell you wanna deal with their bullshit. Ignoring your pleas and staring harm in the face? Forget it. “I’m going to Yuri’s.” 

“What? Nah, come home tonight and we’ll talk.” 

“I just—No.” Taehyung has to grip your shoulder before pulling you into a hug. And you’re still steel in his arms because you haven’t been this upset in ages. “I’m not talking to any of you for awhile.” 

And you mean that. 

“…Fine. But go asap then. I don’t want you out late on your own.” 

So you gotta listen to what he wants but when it comes to what you say, it’s crickets? Goddamn, you’re furious. “…Of course you don’t.”

And you hang up before anyone can say anything else. 

-

-

You open the front door to your brother leaning against the hallway wall.

Both of you eye each other, one of you with a perfectly fine face and the other that isn’t so lucky because he’s a fool.

And no words are exchanged as you trudge your frustration to the kitchen. 

-

-

Ice. Bandages. Dinner. Anger propels you through it all.

Whipping up a quick but hearty meal, you let your brother patch himself up after demanding he showered. The smells of comfort food waft through your nose as things sizzle on the stove and, through the whole process, you don’t think about anything except how upset you are.

They’re all okay. But like Taehyung so abruptly put it, they’re all stupid. 

As you turn off your burner, you transfer everything to a bowl, sighing so loud it seasons the top with fire. When you approach the bar, your actions speak pretty damn loud—the dish clank shoving out a question from your sibling,

“Is there something you wanna say to me?” 

“There’s a bunch of shit I wanna say to you.” 

“It’s about Yoongi,” he asks, the absence of hesitation making your insides squeeze. “Isn’t it.” 

But luckily for you, your rage is so potent that it overruns your fear. As soon as your brother stands up and starts to repeat his question, your correction clangs through the room, 

“It’s about all of you! You say you wanna be there for me but what the fuck will doing this shit do?” 

Freezing, the man waits in shock as you keep going, “Yes, that guy deserves hell. I was so scared when he grabbed me at the club.” You stop to swallow. “But I had them both there and we left.”

Fuck, this is hard. Having to relive that shit is difficult but you need your brother—and all of them, for that matter—to know how hurt you feel right now. Mustering up enough bravery to get to the goddamn point, you finally squeak out, 

“If I lose them? Lose you? Because of something as stupid as a fight?” Your eyes search his, and your heart cracks when you see glassy sheen amongst his bruises. “What would I do then?” 

You expect silence. And silence is what you get. It’s drawn out, loud, and telling. “We know.” 

“Do you?”

“Yes,” he whispers, eyes lifting to meet yours with sincerity. “And we’re sorry.”

Another moment passes between the two of you, the food you made left uneaten on the counter and the rest sitting still on the stove. But you know your sibling will eat it all tonight, whether you’re there or not. 

And you step forward at the same time he holds his battered arms out. 

Freshly showered, he still smells like rain and exertion. But his heart beats under your chest, he’s present, and back home—things you need to stop taking for granted. 

But you’re still mad. And getting things off your chest has only made you tired, so you decide that it’s finally time to go before you circle back to other scary territory brought up tonight. “I’m leaving now,” you announce as you step away. “But just think about that.” 

“I will.”

“I’m serious.” 

“I will.”

Staring, you take note of his cuts and injuries, wondering how the others are faring even though you don’t wanna deal with anything else. Because it hurts too much, and if you see who you’re thinking about, there’s no telling what you’d do if you were like this with your brother. There’s no telling how you’d…

No. You choose to go the easy route this time. Everyone can simmer in their sore, swelling consequences while you have a night of de-stressing with your friends. 

So you leave to go pack without another word. 

It’s raining. 

Hard.

And even though your car is heading to Yuri’s, your heart is beating backwards. Tugging you somewhere else and not letting up. 

With a ping of chill, you can’t shake it. Braking at a stop sign close to your destination, you sit in silence, letting the rain pelt every side of your vehicle and wondering what the hell to do. 

Truthfully? Your brother looked like shit. But your body isn’t telling you to go back to the house, which can only mean one other place. And you know for a fact you don’t wanna talk to him, either. 

So fucking upsetting. They did all that for what? You can barely keep your thoughts in a row because they keep yelling at jostling each other just like everybody did on the court. If anyone had to fight the dipshit, it should've been you. 

Fuck! Your head connects with the wheel, an inner monster rumbling with the thunder because you’re so fed up with everything that happened. 

Your brain is the one yelling. But your heart is begging for it to listen. Go to Yuri’s? Go to Yoongi’s. Find shelter in that warm bed of hers and sink in her plushies to comfort you? 

A sigh. Maybe you can at least call him to tell him off one more time. He needs to hear what you told your brother because if you ever, ever lose him—

Your eyes burn. 

Yoongi: Outgoing Call

No answer.

Yoongi: Outgoing Call

Pick up. What the fuck.

Yoongi: Outgoing Call

…Turn the fuck around shit, shit, shit.

Curses flying, you whip your vehicle in a flash, heart pounding so loud it’s blocking out the storm. Which is morbidly impressive considering how horridly it’s pouring. 

Thinking in leaps, you pivot and make another decision. Tell her and make it all quick. 

Yuri: Outgoing Call

“Hello?”

“Hey, I’m not coming.”

“You okay?”

“I’m going to Yoongi’s.”

“Yoongi’s? Why?”

Ah, shit. Oh, fuck. She doesn’t know. 

Banging the steering wheel, you smash your teeth, stressed as hell from braving the rain in the dark and now snitching on yourself to someone else. 

Damn it. What do you say? What can you possibly even say when you’re so mad and stressed and conflicted and worried—

“Hello?”

“Because he’s the one,” you whoosh out, your vision quivering twice as much as it should. “And things went down after the game and now something feels wrong.”

“Oh, shit. Is that why y’all didn’t come to—”

“Yes.” When you say all this out loud, now it has weight. Horrifying weight on your chest and a block pushing down on the gas. You hear a bit of shuffling on the line, and you’re starting to get so anxious that you blurt, “Please don’t say anything. Please.”

“I won’t. Not about this.”

“Thank you.”

“Hang up, babe. Make it safe.”

“Okay.”

Go, go, go. Please, just get there. 

Letting up, you change your speed, hoping to everything good in the world that this feeling you have is only a feeling and nothing more. 

Yoongi: Outgoing Call

What a strange emotion, wanting his reason for not picking up solely being because he doesn’t wanna talk to you. That is an answer you can deal with. 

But you still can’t fight off the jagged pulses telling you it’s something else. 

After an agonizing drive, you finally see his complex, tensing harder the further and further away you have to park. 

Whipping into a spot, you screech into it before hauling your bag out, popping the trunk and desperately grabbing a plastic box you always keep inside. 

And the mad dash drenches you long before you seek cover, your bones shivering shivering shivering from the chill.

Yoongi has to be home. His car is here. 

But he still won’t pick up the fucking phone.

Skidding at his door, your knocks are rapid, knuckles singed from the ice cold wraps.

Answer, answer, answer. For fuck’s sake, he better answer. 

After a haunting moment of silence, you decide to call one more time, head wet and bones shivering as you press the phone to your damp ear. 

Finally. “Hello.” 

“Open the door,” you jump into commanding, hearing nothing other than a voice that sounds so crushed and low that it crumples you inside. 

“You’re here?” 

“Yeah, let me in.” Fuck, your teeth are clattering against each other, whether it’s from the rain, the cold, or anger, you can’t tell. 

But the reply you get is the coldest thing imaginable. And it sets your whole body aflame. 

“Not tonight.”

Hell no. Hell fucking no Yoongi is not going to get rid of you that easily. Not when you have a boatload of things to say and only one dock to dump them all on, “Yoongi, I swear to god—” 

“Not tonight—”

“—you don’t let me in I’m—”

“Go home—”

“I’m fucking staying out here until you open the goddamn door!”

Oh, you’re pissed. You’re so fucking pissed because this all could’ve been avoided if none of them were stupid. Or prideful. Or whatever the fuck boys decide to be when they can’t let something go. 

And this man still has the audacity to give you the stiff arm, silence on the line before he rasps out another short, “I’m serious.”

“No.”

“Go home.” 

“No!” 

He says your name. So, so softly, before a gut-wrenching, 

“Please.”

Breath shaken, you rest your forehead against chilly wood, hoping it quells the fire you feel rising from your rib cage. 

You can’t give up. Not when you have so much to say. Not when you have to check on him and make sure he’s fine. 

Not when you give into the strongest premonition that you need to be nowhere else but with him tonight. 

You will stay. Stay, stay, stay. Even if he doesn’t want to see you. 

Voice trembling in rage and concern and everything in between, you feel your eyes sear through when they close, mission boiling down to one more desperate choice, 

“…No.” 

You’re cold. And wet. But you will stand out here for as long as it takes him to let you inside—a night, a day, no matter what.

And for a moment. Or a few. You think he’s dead set on making you prove that. 

But you finally, finally, finally hear a sigh before a lock turn, and you try to prepare yourself for what you see but he opens the door and his face comes into view holy shit he looks like a wreck—

“What the fuck,” you grit out as you rush in with vision swimming, digging into your bag for the medkit you hastily stashed and swinging off your sandals because you gotta get something in the—

A hand grips you hard, tugging you back before you even register what’s happening.

As your feet stumble back onto linoleum, your gaze snaps to the ground. 

And your breath cuts like it’s your last. 

Shards. 

Pieces.

Thousands of wood and glass chips litter the entire open area of the living room. 

And realizing where they came from strikes like lightning. 

Fuck. Oh, fuck, what did Yoongi do?

“I told you, doll.”

You choke on a sob.

“Go home.”

Your breaths return before you straighten, tears flowing freely as you don’t know whether to start cleaning up the chaos or finally facing the one who caused it.

No, no, no. Get rid of it. 

Throw it out, all of it, all of it. 

A new fire roars to life, forging your steeling commitment as you wrestle out of Yoongi’s hold.

What did he do, what did he do?

Revving with smoke out of your ears, you burn a path to the kitchen, grabbing a trash bag before marching into the wreckage. Up go the biggest pieces first, chucked into plastic before the smaller ones follow.

Throw it all. This one, this one, and this one.

Yoongi isn’t even wearing shoes. He can cut himself up even more if this all stays where it is. 

Shit, this is everywhere. 

When you realize you’re gonna need a broom, you storm back into his laundry closet to yank one out and keep going. When you go to sweep, the sharpest voice cuts through your fingers.

“Stop.”

Your grit grips the tool even tighter. Because you won’t. Don’t dare look into his expression, either, because you know that one glance will melt every scream on your tongue. So you stay resolute and shoot rejection to the ground, “No.”

“Just go, please.”

“No.”

This hurts. 

This really, really hurts. 

Yoongi has never, ever said these things to you and it feels like a knife jabbing into the same spot over, and over again. You almost prefer three new months of no contact over whatever the hell this is.

But you have to keep going. Eyes clenching, lips wobbling, you must keep going. 

Because you came here for a reason other than this mess. And he’s gonna have to do better than this to kick you back out into the rain. 

“I got it.” 

“Let me do it.” 

“Your brother needs you.”

“Yeah, well, I already tore the fuck into him and I’m gonna do the same to you.” You harden your fist on the sweeper, tugging it more towards your shoulder with finality. And you gather all the energy you need to leave no more room for arguments, because Yoongi is going to listen, “So sit down.”

It hurts.

He wants to say shit. You know he wants to.

But he only breathes hard with eyes closed, following your orders and carrying his dark clouds to the dining room. 

When he finally leaves you alone, this is when you look his way. 

In sweats and a shirt, he appears fine. But with a deep pang, you notice he’s slightly limping. Judging from those knuckles, you wonder if they’re red from the fight or from hitting another wall of his apartment. 

Or from whatever the fuck happened around your feet.

Shit.

While he dumps himself at his table, you clean up the pieces of his rampage, mentally noting that one plan of yours has now changed. 

This one. These, too. A string here. A metal piece there.

You don’t know how long it takes you. All you know is that you’re burning inside, determined to clean everything and sweep this chaotic energy away. 

One more. Two more. Another one here.

As soon as you’re done, you lug the trash bag out of the front door and don’t give a shit what happens to it now.

Keep going. There’s more that you need to take care of.

The fuel inside of you rages on, anger conflicting with anxiety and past worries and sadness for something that didn’t even happen. As you spin, you vow yourself to keep pushing until you can’t anymore. 

Sniffling. Shivering. But staying strong because things could’ve gone a lot worse. 

Yoongi meets you by the table, messy, damp hair shielding his features. “You’ve done enough.” 

“I still need to—” 

“Just.” He looks away. “Go home, doll. I can’t do this tonight.” 

“Do what? I’m helping you.” 

That’s what you do for each other, right? You both help each other. But now you’re not so sure because Yoongi comes back with not an acknowledgement, nor a way of relenting. 

But ice. 

“Who said I needed it?” 

And in all the time you’ve spent with this man, this is the first time you’ve felt downright cold. “Yoongi, what?” Your eyes travel across his face, chest caving in when there’s barely any hints of vitality. “Are you serious?” 

“You think I’m joking?” 

“You’re kicking me out? What happened to saying you’d never do that, huh?” 

“I say a lot of things.” 

…Oh.

That hurt. That… That physically couldn’t have hurt any harder. 

Nodding, you look away, shaking your head in disbelief because you are on the verge of losing it. “You know what? You do say a lot of things.”

Walking away, you start rearranging pillows on the couch pushed askew. “Like how perfect I am.” Picking up his books from the now non-existent coffee table. “And how there’s no one else.” 

As you give the volumes a new home on his intact tv stand, you turn to face him again. “Those are just words, too, huh?” 

Yoongi kicks his head back with a smile, one that cuts instead of mends. “Nah… Not tonight.” 

“Not tonight what.” 

“We aren’t doing this tonight.” 

“The fuck we aren’t.” It’s his turn to walk away, with a slow head shake that you really don’t like. “Where are you going?” 

“Nowhere.” Yoongi shifts his head to the side, but not enough for you to fully see him. It’s almost as if he doesn’t want you to. “But you’re going home.” 

Something’s off. There’s something completely off but all you feel is sadness and rejection in your ribcage. “So this is how it happens, huh. Now I’m just like everyone else.” 

He finally faces you, miles away even though you’re just rooms apart. “You’re gonna go there?” 

“I am.” 

“Wow.” 

That’s what he comes back with? This is gutting you from the inside out and you have no idea what’s happening but now rage is flaring into your mouth, “You think I wanted to come here? After what all of you did?” 

“Do you even know?” 

“No! But how the fuck would I? You don’t tell me shit!” 

“That’s cus—” 

Your response sears over his floors, “I can take care of myself. But none of you told me about that dude from the court. None of you.” Breath shaken, you continue dumping out all your thoughts and previous concerns, “If I had known? That whole Dalo thing could’ve been avoided and I would’ve ran.” 

For a person that you’ve come to know as so warm, Yoongi’s entire aura freezes you over as you keep talking. “And today? You know how fucking scared I was? If I… I…” 

All he does is stare. Why isn’t he doing anything else? Is he really flipping the switch and choosing to legitimately let you leave this time?

Fine then. 

“You know what?” Giving up, you laugh—harsh, and breathy, and without any joy at all. “Forget it. You’re not even listening anyway.”

“I swear to—I just said not tonight.” 

Frustration from the game, fear from the ambush after, anxiety from not hearing from them. All of it coalesces into something you can’t even control anymore. Your buffer shuts off, the monster you created seizing the reins, “No, I get it. I do! You want me gone. Sure. See you in three more months.” 

Stunned, Yoongi huffs in disbelief, jaw working overtime. “Are you serious?” 

“Yes, I am. Trying to help you but it looks like you don’t even want that. So good fucking bye.” 

And it looks like he has a beast of his own because his next response to your last attempt has you reeling back in shock, 

“Who asked you?” 

Dark liquid drips onto your soul. 

You can only stare, unblinking and feeling like you’re in an entirely different universe. “Who asked me? Who asked me.” 

“That’s what I said.” 

Forget the question of who asked you because… Who are you even talking to? Who is this person standing in front of you because it’s not the Yoongi you know. It’s so jarring and hurtful and strange that you truly feel thrust into the middle of a nightmare. 

You’re gonna do it. You’re actually gonna leave this time. 

“You know what? Kiss my ass, Yoongi.” 

God, it hurts. It hurts. It hurts.

It hurts.

You don’t even know where this is all coming from. All you know is that you’re angry and there’s no stopping the hot magma bubbling in your center. 

Silence fills the room.

And it rains. It pours.

But finally, you hold a sob back before burning a shaky path to his door, wrestling with the lock before yanking it open—

Only to have it shut back in your face, so thrown when you realize you’re getting spun. Air whooshes out of you before your shoulder blades connect with wood—  

And this is the goddamn breaking point. The walls you haphazardly built to keep you upright collapse and tumble. It’s so potent and blinding that you don’t even realize your hands are connecting with his chest in the weakest, saddest ways and you are outright screaming. 

“God, what the fuck! I told you to—We didn’t hear from you for hours and I—I didn’t know if you were okay—” 

“Whoa, hold u—” 

“I thought the worst and I—didn’t even get a chance to—I finally told you want I wanted and you—Fuck—” 

“Just listen—” 

“Don’t ever do that again! I don’t wanna lose you and today was so fucking scary and I’m not, fucking, leaving—” 

Your lips are smashed to hell, his lips bruising so hard you feel it in the back of your skull. And it’s a whole storm as Yoongi pins you against the door, leg wedging between yours and his hands gripping you like a vice. It’s intense. It’s overwhelming. 

“I swear to—” 

You don’t know what to do. What to do what to do what to do, and all your madness jangles as you’re yanked and slammed against another wall, breath leaping into his open mouth before you tug at his hair, digging anger through his shoulders. 

“Can’t fucking listen, can you?” 

“No,” you rip from your throat, shoving him back only to gravitate right back and lock lips again. 

And he rips at your clothes, tearing the front of your shirt so far your chest emerges on full display. Before you can even react to the cuts on his face, Yoongi’s hand clenches around your throat, making you gargle just how you fucking want to right now. 

“Shouldn’t even fucking be here.” 

“When has that ever stopped us.” You groan as you get rapidly led back into something hard, and you realize it’s the dining table digging into your ass. 

“He’s still home.” 

“So?”

“Shouldn’t you—”

“Then kick me out!” you taunt. “For real. Let me go. Fucking do it then.” 

Yoongi works his jaw before gripping tighter, making you groan and your gut flare into something primal. Nostrils flaring, he moves to grip your head hard enough to make your stomach flip but not firm enough to scare you. 

Never to scare you. “You aren’t gonna leave me alone.” 

Your eyes are ice. 

“Are you.” 

You solely watch in determination, breath harsh from your nose and billowing out like steam. Drilling your answer into his eyes, you charge the surrounding air enough to spark like the flashing sky outside. 

And Yoongi cracks like lightning. 

“Goddamn it.” 

Everything happens at once and in quick succession. Teeth grit to hell, Yoongi pulls you upward before fast stepping you to his bedroom, slamming you through the door before you shove him right into his desk. 

Things teeter and shake and clang with each impact, your storm disrupting everything in its path and creating a tornado of desire and thoughts in your brain. 

Something swirls and twists between your souls, tightening and condensing into emotions darker than midnight. And as angry as you are, it’s slipping into a dangerous mania, and you’ve never been this excited for anything in your life. 

“Stubborn.” 

“Coward.” 

Your back stings as you’re pushed back into his door, the wood smacking into the spackle of his wall. Rough lips smother yours as you claw at his shoulders, neck, hair, and you hear him growl into your mouth, 

“Want me to kiss your ass? Suck my dick then we’ll talk.” 

“Fuck you. I give better head than you anyway.” 

His words rival the deepest growl, “Prove it.” 

“Make me.”

Whirlwind. Storm. Tempest. At this point, it’s a whole goddamn high. Your body is thrumming and the only way to feed your anger is to channel it through actions. 

And truth be told, you need this. You both do. With all the high strung emotions that had nowhere to go until you collided?

This is liberation. 

You’re shoved onto your knees before Yoongi dives into his pants, and you’re already hungry and impatient enough to help him shrug his sweats down before he can do it himself. 

“Choke on it,” he commands, holding his dick and watching as you note how hard he already is. When you waste no time taking him in, you elicit the deepest groan you’ve ever pulled from him when you fling spit onto his length. 

Maybe his reaction is to your face. Because you’re still mad as fuck and you aren’t done letting him know that. 

With a passing thought, you realize that this is all new. But you’re welcoming it because it’s working. Only Yoongi can bring out this passion even in anger, or maybe the two of you were going to get to this point no matter what. 

“Fuck.” He steadies the bottom of your chin while you suck him off. “Uh huh. Got anything else to say?” 

You flick him off, and he hums with a rumble, his cock reacting and hitting the back of your prideful throat. 

“Fuck you, too, doll.” His talks devolve into hisses, grunts, moans when you slobber all over yourself, and your cunt is already dripping with your own slick. “There you go. Gonna take it all? Or are you gonna keep running that mouth?” 

And you pop off before taunting, “Find out, pussy.” 

And you’re swallowing him before he shoves you all the way forward, your body arching up in a gag but filled with him him him, your nose flat against his pelvis and his dick squeezing tears from your eyes and your throat overstuffed to hell and there’s no way he’s gonna forget this moment. You’re making damn sure of it. 

Another middle finger raises as you’re tensing around him, and you can barely hear him above you but you do know he’s massively pleased. Tears stream down your eyes when you’re yanked off, gasping for air and being pulled off the ground. 

“Holy fuck.” 

Throat hoarse, you attempt speech but it doesn’t matter anyway, because his lips steal them all. And your cunt is slapped with a whole palm, making you flinch and shoot out a whine into his kiss. 

Before you know it, your body hits the bed before he joins you, arms bulging as he rips your top open completely. You can’t even think straight as he teases your earlier efforts, “I’ve had better.” 

“Oh, you fucking—Shut the fuck up,” you growl, a moan leaving without permission as he palms your cunt again. Just when you think he’s gonna top you, Yoongi hauls you up, hastily leading you around the bed until your back connects with another wall. 

You love that shit. And you’re starting to think Yoongi is very, very aware of this fact. 

“Take those fuckin’ pants off,” he orders. “And hands on the wall before I put them there.” 

“Can’t make me do shit—”

Fingers grip your chin before Yoongi gets right into your face, primal instinct making you go on full alert. As his tongue prods his cheek, your whole lower body quivers. “I can. And I will, if you don’t behave.” Tapping your jaw in a warning, he hums. “Now do what I fucking say.” 

Holy shit, he’s not playing around. Which only heightens your desire to peaks previously unreached, and you’re shucking your bottoms off while he yanks his drawer open for condoms. Hurrying, you fling your clothes away before planting—

Yoongi smashes his whole front against your back—pinning your whole body against the cold, rough wall—before intertwining long fingers with yours. “Good girl.” 

Hitching your hips back, he sticks your ass out as you slip, and you feel his cock tease your entrance. Groaning, you grip your hands into fists as he continues to rub your cunt but never enter. Denying, denying, denying. Smacking your pussy and still not letting you feel him inside. 

And it’s maddening. “Please!” 

“Please what,” he asks, giving your ass a spank that has you flinching into the wall. 

And, without any shred of mercy, this goes on for longer than he’s ever held out. It’s so sickening that tears start flowing from your eyes, and you devolve into saying anything to get him to fuck your brains out. Between spanks on your ass, slaps on your tits, and aggravating kisses on your back, Yoongi doesn’t let you phase him for minutes. 

It’s when you choke on a sob that he finally, finally squeezes inside of you, checking for your nod before wrecking you completely. 

“Oh, fuck—” Your eyes shut tight as you try to keep yourself upright, hands pushing against the wall as your legs shift with every thrust. 

“This ass. Fuck.” Yoongi’s pace is relentless, hands bruising your hips and your cheeks smacking into his pelvis over and over and over. “It’s a goddamn problem.” 

You’re trying so hard. So, so hard to stay on the wall. But your hands are too sweaty; they're starting to slip with each attempt. “Bed,” you command. “Bed now.” 

And he obliges immediately, pulling out and yanking you back. Mouth to your ear, he both checks in while making your legs jelly, “You tapping out?” 

“Break my fucking back,” you rasp in return, hearing him growl in satisfaction before burying you facedown into his bed. As he plunges inside again, you grip at his sheets, driven to the brink and reveling in all the things he’s saying to you while feeling him in your stomach. 

Suddenly, you feel your arms pulled back, and you yell into his mattress as he buries himself even deeper. Everything you’re screaming makes no sense, but the phenomenal sensation you feel as you go limp renders you speechless anyway. 

Yoongi knows exactly what he’s doing as he pushes his thumb into your asshole, because you clench so hard around him that he chuckles darker than dark. Careening into space, you kiss the edge of euphoria before he inconveniently pulls out, launching a sling of insults from your mouth. 

“What was that?” 

“I said fuck you!” 

“Thought so.” 

Not done in the slightest, Yoongi hauls your thighs so flush against him that you have to use your fingertips for support. Just as you’re about to argue, he rams into you from a new and impossibly enticing angle and holy fuck it feels so good you want to weep.

“Put that fucking hand down,” he growls, smacking away the fingers you didn’t even know were on your mouth. “If you wanna talk shit.” 

“Fuck—!” 

“Uh huh. Let it out, baby girl.”

You’ve never felt this out of control. This wild. This out of body. Your head is yanked back, your back pressing into the front of his shirt before you feel him so far into your guts that you quiver. 

Now at the mercy of his tongue in close range, you hear his gravelly tone in your ear, “What’s my fuckin’ name.” 

“Asshole—” 

A hard smack to your tits has you crumpling with a whine. “Say it.” 

“I’ll say it if I wanna say it—” 

Another spank to your inner thigh and you’re gone. Eyes roll as he tweaks your nipple, and your words are almost garbled when he grips your chin from behind. “This what we’re doing? Hmm?” 

You laugh breathy before you taunt, “Uh huh.” 

“Mm…” Despite your laugh, you shake. “I wouldn’t do that, doll.” 

“Make me. Bet you can’t.” 

Tensed and veins angry, Yoongi grips both your tits before snarling, “That’s enough.” 

Swiftly, he shoves you down into the sheets, muscular frame pinning you as he strokes up into you just right. Again. Again. It’s all too slow and too effective and you’re trying to stay mad but all you can feel is perfection, your back arching at his thrusts and mewling at his low growls in your ear. 

“You wanted this.” Another thrust. “Talking shit.” Your jaw goes slack. “Pissing me off.” 

Your groan is downright erotic. Why why why? Just knowing you’re making him this mad flutters your cunt and, from the sinister chuckle shooting into your neck, Yoongi definitely felt that. 

“Fuckin’ thought so.” 

When he reaches to grab your breasts, the last thrust has you crying out in a flurry of pleasure. 

Every single thought is Yoongi, from beginning to end in a biblical cycle of debauchery. Exertion leaves you slick, sweat coating the expanse of your skin only to press into his bed, your mess your mess your mess. At his hands. The smacks of his cock. The rolls of his hips. Are you gone? Are you here? If he’s bruised then you feel like you are, too, and you welcome the temporary pain as Yoongi’s fingers dig ever deeper into your waist fuck one’s now pinning your head down. 

The moans you let out are unending, and your thighs shake when all you get in response is a laugh of condescension. 

“Look at you. Can’t even stay mad.” 

“Fuck you!” You’re close, you’re close, you’re close again. Release is at your fingertips, but Yoongi yanks himself out to rip it away from your outstretched fingers. “No!” 

“What, doll.” 

“Please!” 

“Nah.” 

Body sore, you’re flipped over with no mercy as something else presses against your cunt. 

Fucking hell, he’s eating you out now? Shaking, you feel Yoongi’s tongue swirl around your thrumming clit before he sucks, edging you to the point of tears and heartbreak. And it proves too much as you grab at his head, yank at his hair, because he lets up when you’re close. 

Every. Single. Time. 

Your madness spirals into your curses, and he relishes in your despair, continuing to lick and suck and slap your thighs with patience. “What do you say?” 

“Please!” 

“Mm. Not loud enough.” 

“Yoongi, please.” 

“Oh, we’re saying names now?” 

Fuck, fuck, fuck, it aches. It’s starting to borderline hurt. “I’ll be good,” you barter, beg, plead with a head spinning off its own axis. “I’ll do anything.” 

“Do it yourself then.” 

Later, when you look back on tonight, you’ll be embarrassed and shy to hell. But right now, you’re so over any shyness that you don’t hesitate, reaching down to rub at your clit and moaning when it’s so sensitive.

And Yoongi gets a front row seat. 

His groan is gutteral. And it doesn’t take you long to quicken your pace, bucking your hips and whining to the ceiling. You’re so so so close it’s right there—

Your hand is smacked away. And after you try to wrestle out of his grip, you are a flat out, blubbering mess. “Yoongi… Please…” 

“Nah.” 

This is torture. And you’re frightened at how much you’re enjoying it. “I’m so close.” 

“You’ll come when I say you can.” 

“Please! …Please..”

“You done being a brat?” 

“No! Fuck. Yes!” If you weren’t so far gone, you may have deciphered a tiny smile of amusement. But it won’t be for months later until you’ll realize that you were wrong. 

Because the menacing flash of teeth you see is much too wide to be anything other than pride. “The fuck did I say? Use your words.” 

You know you’re still upset. You know Yoongi is still upset. But for some reason, you feel closer to him than you have in awhile, and you wonder if lust and madness are two sides of the same coin. “Let me come. Please.” 

Yoongi finally obliges with something he hadn’t pleasured you with yet. And your vision blanks as you yelp at the sensation, his slick fingers pistoning into your folds so fast you’re arching so taut. From between your quivering legs, you hear one final command, 

“Then fucking come.” 

And you burst, so hard you almost feel like something threatens to spew from your cunt. But all you can do is shake and thrash under his grip, so erratic that you feel like Yoongi’s starting to pin you down. Gone, gone, gone, you’re sure the veins of your neck threaten to break through your sweaty skin. 

Then you feel his cock thrust inside of you, and you whip your head forward only to get your airway cut off. “Again,” he calmly repeats, flinging you back to the last time this happened. 

Only this time, there’s even less room for you to make any other choice. 

“I said again.” 

Your body cannot fathom disobedience, pulsing and milking his perfect fit. Over, and over, and over. You hear rumbling from a dragon above, feel breaths of steam whooshing as it watches you come undone. 

“Yoongi—” 

A light slap to your cheek is your only warning before your chin is tugged, lips smushing into yours to swallow your straining sobs. Fuck, fuck, fuck, your body is still thrumming, inundating around his cock until your emotions spill from your core. Toes. Fingers. Everything is straining and locking in place. 

“So fucking hot.” He rips your soul right out. “Shit.” 

You fly through time and space, gathering emotions and feelings and spiraling spiraling spiraling. Crying. You’re crying. Full on crying you’re so overwhelmed with everything truly you were so mean to him you upset him holy fuck you should’ve left when he told you to—

“Baby.” 

But you cannot stop crying, choke choke gasping on sobs. 

“Babe.” 

“I—I—” 

Your name stabs you with a crisp shot, coupled with a firm grip on your chin, snapping you back to lucid. And Yoongi’s eyes are frantically searching your own. “Look at me.” 

You do. Do you? You do. And his eyes… 

They’re not angry at all. It’s pure concern. Steadfast concentration. And something reflecting your soul. “Breathe.” 

“Oh, shit,” you whisper, coughing and reaching for oxygen you didn’t know you were denying. Air rushes back into your lungs as you inhale. 

“There you go. Keep going.” 

You do, gulping down air and hiccuping a breath or two. Your cheek is being caressed, you think. And with another pass, you know it is. 

“Relax for me.” And you hiccup a sob. “Breathe, babe.” 

You do, you do, you do. Yoongi kisses your forehead, your cheeks, your nose, and you breathe more and more through it all. “You with me?” 

“Always,” you answer, filter off because you are hanging by a thread and he’s holding the top. “Please don’t kick me out ever,” you hiccup. “Please, baby, I’ll do anything for you but I—could—never handle that—” 

You’re tenderly hushed before lips slide over yours, attempting to swallow your thoughts and your sobs and your oncoming tears. As you flood his bed with apologies, Yoongi keeps wiping them all.

“I’m sorry.” 

“Nothing to be sorry for.” 

“I’m really sorry.” 

“Babe.” 

“You told me so many times—” 

“Breathe, angel.” 

You blink at the change in name, and it makes you focus just a bit stronger. Floating down from the precipice. 

“I wasn’t kicking you out,” he slowly explains, kissing sweat from your forehead. His words feel like a calm, rock-filled river over your eyes. “I felt like an idiot and hated you seeing me like this.” 

“Like what?” 

“Just… Like this.” 

“You’re perfect like this,” you hitch out, not caring about what flows out of your mouth. “So perfect. Always to me. I just wanted to help you, baby, I’m so sorry—” 

He hugs you so tight more tears squeeze out. 

And so do more confessions, “I… I care about you. I think a little too much. If I lost you, I wouldn’t—be able—” 

“I’m here.” 

“So please don’t push me away.” 

“I won’t.” 

“I know you don’t make promises but—” 

“I promise.” Without an ounce of doubt, Yoongi places a firm, lingering kiss on your temple. “Promise. Fuck.” As he holds you tight, you feel him shake before you hear the tiniest sniff at your ear. 

Oh. He doesn’t need to be like this, too. You try to move your hand up between your bodies to comfort him, but your whole limb feels gelatinous. So you simply whisper, “It’s okay, baby.” 

You can’t tell how long you lie like this, with his beautiful weight on yours. But time is irrelevant when your mind is unwinding from hours of whirring, starting to finally accept the fact that everyone is okay and you don’t have to be angry anymore. 

“Come on,” Yoongi rasps, voice cracked and airy. “Let’s go.” 

“Hmm?” 

“Shower.” 

“Oh. Okay.” 

You’re so thrown and dizzy from what just happened that even getting to the bathroom is a blur. What you kinda feel is Yoongi holding you upright when your legs buckle, but you don’t remember when he leaves your side to turn the water on. 

As he flips on the light, your eyes squeeze until they adjust, and you watch as he tests the water while fully clothed. Air conditioning starts to give you a chill, but the shower warms up just in time because he reaches out to guide you inside. 

Wait. Is he not joining you? Bleary, you grab at his shirt when he steps away, eyes pleading. “Are you coming in, too?” 

Yoongi stops before he gives a shake of his head. “I’ll take mine when you’re done,” he says through a slight smile. “We’ll take care of you first.” 

That doesn’t make sense. Even in your depleting haze, you know something doesn’t add up. “You can join me now. I don’t mind.” When you try to lift his shirt, Yoongi visibly flinches when you brush over his ribs.

And all the murk around your head vanishes in a snap. 

He kept his shirt on that whole time. Not once did your positions allow you to see his upper body fully. And now he’s not gonna get in the shower or take his shirt off? 

Your voice lowers two octaves when you reach full clarity. “Let me see.” 

Unblinking, Yoongi tries to back away, “Don’t worry—” 

“Let me see it, baby,” you command, breath cut until he finally allows you to lift his shirt up holy fuck those injuries look so painful tears prick your eyes. “Oh, my god, Yoongi—” 

“I’m fine.” 

“You’re hurt.” You feel these wounds deep in your ribs, and you tell him to get your kit what the hell he fucked you while feeling those? 

Attempting to alleviate your stress, Yoongi decides to strip fully and step into the shower, ignoring your pleas to grab your med kit and promising you can take care of him when you’re done washing up. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yes, doll.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Promise.” 

And when his arms wrap around you, this is when you finally let go. Huge, chest-wracking sobs echo around tile, and Yoongi stays quiet through your cathartic release. 

There’s another reason you were so upset. And it has nothing to do with any of them, but with yourself. The main reason you’ve been so riled up and frustrated is because… This is technically your fault, too. 

But, unsurprisingly, he won’t let you take any blame whatsoever. 

“You got hurt cus I said to play.” 

“Nope.” 

“I wore the outfit that day.” 

“Doesn’t matter.” 

“And lost my friends at the club.” 

“No.” 

Sniffling in quick succession, you think about one other option. Some form of closure that can double as compromise. Voice soft, you suggest the last resort you have, 

“How about we share it.” 

Yoongi blinks twice before he clarifies, “You wanna share the blame?” When you nod, he huffs through the tiniest smile of confusion. “Mm. Then it’s our fault.” 

“Okay.” 

After shaking his head, he closes his eyes, molding his forehead with yours. “What are you doing to me.” 

A sniffle. “Wrecking your water bill.” 

His laughs join yours as you barely get your sentence out before giggling, and to feel him so close and present and here makes your worries slink down the drain. 

Hands trace down your arms, walking along falling rivers before creating ponds with your fingers intertwined. “Gonna clear me out someday.” 

“Duh.” 

He’s himself again. 

And after a whole night of chaos, you feel like yourself again, too. 

That’s all you both need to feel peace. 

-

-

You keep that tranquility carrying you through his room, peeking into his closet to grab the biggest shirt and sweats you can find before drying your head. 

But no matter how much water you can dry, your body will keep being washed in relief. And it’s the calmest feeling, watching as Yoongi does the simplest things near his bed. 

Your lips curve when he pulls up his pants; your heart beats when he grabs a tee. It’s in this moment that you admit that these outfits of his are your favorites, and you gravitate to him as he slips cotton over his damp head. 

“Come on,” you softly offer as you turn. “I’ll make food and get you some ice.”

Again, Yoongi just stares with a faint smile. But his eyes are alive again, so you’re more than fine if he just follows your lead without a word.

In the kitchen, you pause amongst the appliances, the cabinets watching as you utilize your phone to find a good recipe. “What shall we eat… Stew? Or, wait—” 

Looking up, you eye him in thought before choosing to focus on something else. “Actually, let’s figure you out first.” 

Opening yet another tab to add to your hundreds, you type away before selecting a good starting point. “Okay, let’s see. You’re breathing fine, so no bruised ribs. Umm…” 

Scroll, scroll. 

“It looks really bad there, though. You sure you can move right?” 

Despite asking, you go right back to your phone before Yoongi can even respond. Scrolling and clicking and reading again. 

Scroll, scroll. 

“Okay, so no bruised ribs, and according to this you don’t have any broken bones. And nothing fractured, either, thank god—”

“I love you.” 

Time bursts.

Your chest glows. 

Everything starts to beat, beat, beat in slow motion. 

And you don’t even feel like you’re in the room anymore. “…What?” 

You need to hear it again. You need to need to need to, because if you heard him wrong, you will check yourself and bolt right out the door. 

His eyes. 

Despite the battlefield on his skin, they are dripping, and sparkling, and full. The whole world suspends as he stares right into your soul, caressing it with his wounded hands and cradling it in his bruised arms. 

No matter how hard the moon will try—for years, and years, and years more—it will never outshine this single, shaken, solidified admittance. 

“I love you, doll.”

You don’t know what to do. You don’t know what to fucking do. 

Why is Yoongi saying this now? Why is he choosing now of all times to make you the happiest person in the universe? 

No. 

Happiness isn’t even close to what you feel and you’re pretty sure you’re crying but nothing makes sense and your vision plunges under sunlit waters. 

“And you don’t have to say anything. I know I don’t deserve to.” 

What?

“I can’t be everything you want. Or need. Or whatever the fuck I’m trying to say. But I just needed you to know because I can’t fucking fight this shit anymore—” 

You lunge forward before he offers his last syllable, careful to avoid his wounds and not mush his face because he would do the same for you. 

And it’s all too much tonight. The lingering fear, the dying anger, the floods of relief, the joy. You can’t stop your sobs from coming out in bursts, your whole body wracking with overwhelming emotion as he grits into your skin,

“Goddamn it, I—”

“Yoongi—”

“—so fucking much.”

Yoongi loves you. He’s here. He loves you, loves you, loves you and the beats of your heart pulse orange and blue, blue, blue. 

Nothing will ever compare to this moment. Nothing. You will bottle this one up in a jar to place next to all the others you have stored, and when you are lonely, or hurt, or even when you’re doing just fine, you will uncork it to surround yourself with this memory and know that everything will be okay. 

He loves you. 

Fuck, he loves you? 

You choke out his name with a sob, and he squeezes you even harder. When you can’t reply with anything else, he buries his face in the crook of your shoulder, his tears taking root and blossoming into beautiful vibrant fruit all along your rib cage.

He loves you.

Why can’t you seem to say it back? What the fuck is wrong with your tongue?

Maybe it’s because saying it doesn’t feel like enough. Like it’s laughable that there are words for this feeling because they don’t nearly represent what you harbor in your very being for this man. 

There’s no way any words are enough. Not for him. Nor for you. Because right now, Yoongi needs something more. And you’re going to give him more than everything. 

“Yoongi, I—”

He captures your lips in his, and you let him push you against his counter and consume you everywhere he wants to. Between his claims, your sobs have room to breathe. Which makes for a horrible showing of your attempting to say what you want to. “I… I can’t… Yoongi—”

Fingers press into the back of your head, a forehead smushing into yours and shutting you up completely. “I’m sorry,” he says, words rolling down the tracks your tears have walked. “I won’t ever be able to say that enough.” 

“Baby,” you hiccup, resting a hand over one of his. “It’s okay.” 

“It’s not.”

“It is.” You squeeze his hand, feeling the lovely digs of his knuckles in your palm. His scent wafts around you like an embrace, and you know there’s nothing quite like it. At all. “You’re okay, so I’m okay.” 

After he plants a warm kiss on your temple, you feel his hands ball into fists at your ears. “I just—fuck.” 

There’s no telling what he’s thinking about in that brain of his. But you need him to know that there’s nothing more for him to be sorry for. All you care about is that he’s present, responding, and himself. 

“Babe,” you whisper, still not believing those three words coming out of his mouth. “I’m here.” 

“I know.” He sighs, smushing into your lips and holding you so tenderly, yet so tight. As he laps at your tongue, you’re more than sure he can taste your rainfall. 

None of this is real. Because you can’t believe it at all. Even as Yoongi continues his journey across your neck, your shoulders, your jaw, your face, you still can’t piece together that this is truly happening.

When you feel him hard on your pelvis, you remember that he didn’t get the same release you got earlier. But you’re not gonna be the one to suggest going again, all of this will be what he decides. 

And what Yoongi decides is to pull you closer, breathing you in while you do the same. His kisses are never ending, and your hands roam languidly along his shoulders, his hair, stretching across the expanse of his back. One that has held the weight of the world and then some.

His name leaves your mouth in a sigh, your back arching as softly as the kisses being planted along your breasts. 

“If you only knew,” he whispers, laughing to himself as he wraps an arm around your side.

“Knew what?”

“Nothing, babe.” You gasp into his next rough press to your lips. “You’re so—fuck.”

You said you’d let him lead. But as Yoongi starts to walk you into his bedroom again, you think about his injuries and feel more concerned after knowing they’re there. So you quietly stop him as you reach his bed, “Are you sure?” 

“I’ll be alright, doll,” he whispers, lowering you down and smiling so tranquilly your heart lurches. “As much as I think you enjoyed the first time, this time will be better.” 

Giggling, you fight the heat from searing your cheeks as you smile. “You enjoyed it more than I did, I think.” 

“I don’t think so.” Yoongi smirks, getting up. “Lemme get a cond—” 

“It’s okay,” you halt him with a hand, and he freezes. 

Full stop. No movement. Not even a breath. “...What?” 

“We don’t…” You swallow, stomach fluttering at his expression. “We don’t have to this time.” 

Because Yoongi’s eyes have not left your face. “You sure?” 

Then something causes you to smile. Knowing that if there’s anyone you want to do this with, it’s this man right here and now. There’s genuinely no one else in the world with whom you would wanna share this experience, and the fact that he’s still asking makes you emotional.

Cradling his face with the most tender touch you can imagine, you confirm, “Just for a little bit.” And you add something you think he needs to keep hearing. “I trust you.” 

Gulping down any extra emotions spilling from your heart’s chalice, your words come out a little wobbled. “And I want to, if you want it, too.” 

“I want what you want, doll.” 

“Then it’s okay.”  

Clothes on or off, you still feel so shy underneath him. 

But this time, you vow to shove those feelings of unworthiness to the side. Because you are fully invested in this moment above all others. And Yoongi deserves more than you can give. 

When he slowly tugs his sweats from your legs, you’re already choking back tears. As he climbs on top, you await the connection you never in your dreams would’ve imagined. 

And when Yoongi stares at you one more time, you know exactly what he’s asking. 

“Yes, my love,” you wisp into his skin, craning up to kiss him and swallowing his last slice of doubt. Knowing you’ll say it again and again and again. 

His brows pinch as he kisses you—slow, purposeful, understanding. Then he positions himself, and you can physically feel his hand brush your cunt as he does so. If he ever asks if you felt him shake, you will deny it. But only for a year or two. 

As soon as you feel him—only him, solely him—you swell with a current of emotion. And it pulls you all the way under when he’s fully sheathed inside. 

“Holy fucking shit.” 

“Yoongi—” 

“Fuck.” 

Simply having him inside, with no barriers or obstacles in between? You’re already close. There’s no early explanation, but you already feel overwhelmed enough to come. 

No no no. You want this to last forever, so you wait for Yoongi to gather himself because he appears to be fighting, too. 

Chuckling, you ask, “You good, baby?” 

And your lover snaps his gaze to your face, bangs sweeping across your cheeks and eyes unblinking. “Yeah, just...” He stares at your inquisitive expression before whooshing out a harsh breath. “Just this is about to make me bust.” 

You burst into laughter before admitting you were just thinking the same thing, and his slow grin makes you want to cry. “We’re not good at this.” 

“No. You’re too good at this. I can’t even move.” 

“Yes, you can,” you whine. “You wreck my shit all the time.” 

Feeling a twitch more prominent than ever, you giggle as Yoongi puffs out pained amusement. “Doll, if you keep talking like that, I’m pulling out.” 

“Okay, okay,” you surrender, loving how out of sorts he seems. He’s fighting for his life and you’re enjoying the hell out of it. 

“You’re a little too perfect right now.”

Maybe one day you will agree with him. But that day is far from reach, your head shaking in quiet disagreement.

“You are.”

“Nowhere close,” you whisper.

His nose brushes against yours. “Say that again and see what happens.”

“Is that what you tell all the others fuck!”

His shove up your cunt makes you see stars. “What did I fuckin’ say?” 

“What—”

Another launch has you careening through space, lip bitten and suppressing a hearty whine. “You think there’s someone else?” Again. “Hmm?” 

Again. 

You’re so dazed and mind-fucked to pieces that your speech is barely audible. But your chin is grabbed as you’re snapped straight, and your eyes try their hardest to focus on slitted ones above. “You’re gonna regret saying that.” 

You just laugh, whine pinging sharp into the ceiling as he shoves forward so hard your whole body shifts upward. “Oh, yeah?” 

Yoongi doesn’t respond with words, thrusting up again and sending you twisting and winding towards the edge unbelievably fast. “Uh huh.” 

“Make me then,” you gasp out. “Make me really sorry.” 

The sound Yoongi makes comes from deep within his stomach, the rumbling hum shooting right into your veins like liquid fire. 

And the full-on attack he bursts into renders you completely speechless. Everything Yoongi does pulls you deliciously in all directions—his thrusts, his chain hitting his chest, his grip on your wrists, the way he snags your chin. Everything. 

“Taking me so well like this.” 

“I—”

“So fucking tight.”

Fuck fuck fuck it’s habitual for you at this point, and you unhinge your jaw a split second before he smacks the side of your face. Desire lowers your lids halfway as you feel empowered, and you don’t even recognize your voice as you order him on the spot. “Do it again.” 

Yoongi doesn’t stop his pace as he keeps his eyes on you. 

“Do it again,” you growl, fully limp and a groaning mess when he does exactly what you want. 

Fuck, the pain feels good. So good that you reach up and choke him out. But the back of your head is grabbed before you feel hungry lips smash into yours. You feel your wrists pinned again by one large palm, air chilling for a moment before a hot mouth captures one of your nipples. “Oh, fuck, Yoongi!” 

“Uh uh.” 

“Please—please—” 

You’re still tensing as he devours your chest below his shirt, strokes now slower but just as powerful. 

Your arms still haven’t been freed, but there’s something about being under his control that has you loving this position. Without question. Maybe it’s the fact that you can see him now, losing himself just as he saw you washes in the throes of passion. 

And he licks, sucks, lolls his tongue all over your tits, whispered praises sinking through your bosom as he keeps a grip on your wrists. 

“Baby,” you gasp. “I’m close, I’m—” 

“Shit.” Air whooshes over you before you feel your arms freed and him yank himself out, and you freeze as he unloads right on your stomach, a sharp cocktail of pride and shock in your gut. 

Holy fuck, Yoongi was that close? Did he hold out as long as he could? Shit, he’s breathing so hard his jewelry shakes as it dangles. 

You’re still so surprised that your arms are still locked into bends, and he glances up at you from his kneeled state. “Fuck,” he laughs, and is that… Is Yoongi shy? “Thought I could hold out.” 

“No, no, it’s fine,” you assure through your own tiny chuckle. “Oh my god, I promise.” 

He leans down to plant a heart fluttering kiss on your lips, but you hate how he looks pained on the way down. 

Those hits he took… Now you kinda understand his perspective. Because now you want to avenge him in five hundred thousand ways—almost half as many ways as you want to show him how you feel. 

“Stay there, beautiful,” Yoongi orders as he moves to get off the bed, wincing in passes. “I’m not done with you.” 

Damn. He looks even more exhausted than before. “Baby, are you sure?” 

But Yoongi walks right to his bathroom to retrieve a towel, and your eyes may as well transform into hearts when you watch him come back to you. So handsome, even now. Even when he’s simply holding a washcloth, hair completely mussed, soul sparkling and face bruised. 

As he sits to clean your face before moving to your stomach, you can only observe his eyes. So experienced. Calm. At peace. When they drift to yours, it’s instinct that has you shying away. “What, love.” 

Another reason to crumble inside. “I just… nothing,” you whisper. 

And Yoongi finishes with the cloth before tossing it somewhere. “Tell me,” he says, lying down on the ribs with more damage. “I wanna know.” 

“Come on this side,” you tell him, and he obliges without a word. “It’s a secret.” 

“A secret?” 

“Mmhmm.” 

Yoongi settles before lifting your chin, rubbing an affectionate thumb over any tears still persevering on your cheeks. “I can keep those, you know.” 

Smiling, you fold way too easily. “Okay, I’ll tell.” 

When he leans in, your nervousness and excitement to tell him almost spoils your ability to do so. Like someone gifting a present while wanting to say what it is before it’s even opened. 

“I love you, too,” you whisper, tears sprinting to your ducts as Yoongi freezes. When he looks at you, you can’t help but choke on a sob seeing his eyes get as red as the marks on his cheek. “And you deserve more than I could ever give.” 

His eyes hold the heavens and the seas. 

You’re right. Just saying it isn’t fucking enough.

You’re already liplocked again before you can think, saltwater on your face and you don’t even know whose eyes it came from.

Determined, Yoongi starts kissing a trail from your lips to your jaw, and you start to cry as he makes his own journey down the expanse of you. 

All of you.

Is this what it feels like? Is all of this actually, genuinely real?

You hope so, because you feel devotion in each press of his lips, and every touch will be remembered in its own right. Its own pocket of time.

Every single stop.

It almost feels divine when his mouth reaches your folds, lapping at your essence and swirling around your clit. When you say his name, Yoongi says nothing, instead palming your thighs and eating you out like he has all the time in the world. 

Swelling, you already feel close. 

But the way he gets you to fantasia is so natural that you slide into your quivers seemlessly. The transition into your heaven flows like a stream, and your waves engulf his tongue and coat his mouth without trouble. 

This is what it feels like. What it feels like with Yoongi. 

And you wanna keep making love until only sleep can take you from him.

Your hands jut into his hair, gasping as he keeps his pace, and no matter how you squirm he is dead set on holding you down until holy fuck you’re coming again. 

How? What’s happening to you? This constant stream of release is shocking you to the point of crying out, and Yoongi groans into your orgasm and prolongs it with the whole press of his tongue.

“Holy fuck, baby—!” Another wave overcomes the next, and you outright quake in his hands, eyes rolling and vision blinking white. Muscles lock as you can’t keep up with the pleasure, and you’re mercilessly let go only for lips to descend on yours.

Your tears spill into your ears as you kiss him back, wrapping tired arms over his shoulders and raking in deep. 

“Fuck.” And you feel his cock lodge against your entrance, and you’re amazed how hard he is again. 

Does he want what you want? Is he ready again? 

As Yoongi quietly gets up to get a condom, you’re amazed that he wants to keep going after everything that’s transpired. But, if he feels like you do, he’s ready to keep going until the sun comes up three whole times. 

When he sits next to you, your better half appears shy as he bites the wrapper. “Don’t take this the wrong way.”

“Oh, I already know.”

“K. But god, I fuckin’ want to.”

You bite your lip to hold back your smile, remembering what he said a long time ago and bringing it back full circle for the next thing you both wanna try. “One day.”

Yoongi only grins. 

And for the next hour, your lover, your secret, your home gives you everything he has, and you come for him more times than you ever have in your life.

Every time, he drags your pleasure out, expertly tearing you down with his movements and building your confidence up with his words. He tells you you’re perfect, and he disagrees when you disagree. When you find tears on your face, he kisses those away, too. When you feel along his silver, he simply watches you in silence. 

No sadness, doubt, nor anger to be found. 

After you physically can’t do any more, Yoongi lies at your side, silent as you play with his hair. You do your best to stay still, not wanting to accidentally push into any of his injuries that you’re gonna beg him to get checked in the morning. 

Once he’s healed? That’s when you’ll never let go. Because you want to crush him into you completely. Mold into him, just so he can feel the brevity of your highest affection. 

“I’m sorry for yelling,” you finally whisper. “But I really was so mad at you. All of you.” 

“I know.” 

“I don’t wanna lose you.”

“It won’t happen again.” 

“That’s what you said last time.” 

Yoongi stares, seeming to withhold something from you before he palms your cheek. “They were gonna follow us home if we didn’t, babe,” he reveals, snapping your heart back in two. “We all knew that.” 

“Oh, fuck.” Everything hits you at once: why they stayed, why you and Taehyung had to leave. Why Tae didn’t bring you straight back to the house. And the burns at your eyes match the searing in your gut. “I didn’t… I didn’t think about that.” 

When you start to cry, Yoongi sits up and hangs his head between his sweats. “You don’t need to think about shit like that,” he murmurs, sounding defeated as ever. “But we talked after you told us off. We won’t hide that from you anymore.” 

Sniffling, you whisper out a thank you. But you don’t want Yoongi to feel like he has to distance himself, so you untangle him—slowly, gently–-before bringing him into your chest. 

After dealing with all that and the tempest in his living room, this man still let you in. From the looks of things, there’s a lot that he had been fighting, and you’re more than appreciative that he opened his door. Not knowing how to put these feelings into words, you say the first things that come to mind. And for some reason, they feel heavier on the way out, 

“Thank you for letting me in. It was raining really hard.” 

Yoongi stiffens hard before holding you closer. 

“Babe?”

No response. Just another batch of weighted quiet. 

Worried, you tilt your head. “Hey. Look at me.”

If he stays right where he is, you’ll have to respect that decision. But he ends up pushing himself up, and as soon as you see moonlight catch on a falling tear, all your instincts reach for him, “Oh, fuck, come here.”

You surround him with everything you have, wanting every single bit of warmth birthed from his love to fill his space instead of yours. Whatever he needs, you will give. “It’s okay, baby,” you whisper, holding him so close but not nearly close enough. 

Never close enough.

His face is buried in the crook of your neck, and you will let him live there whenever he needs to. “I’m not mad anymore, okay?” God, you hate how he’s still so silent. You get it, but you hate whatever made him default to this state. “I’m just glad you’re alright.”

After light rain fills the room, your soul breaks at a sniffle, and you crush your love even tighter.

“This isn’t about that, doll,” Yoongi finally whispers, burying wet eyes further into your shoulder. “It’s just…”

It’s what? What’s he thinking about? Hopefully it’s not anything—

“It’s so fucking better when you’re here.” 

When you choke out a sob, his body locks, words pouring from nowhere and everywhere. “I sleep better. Eat better. Fuck, I even feel better even if nothing else changes.”

“Yoongi…”

“It’s true.” Sighing, he sniffles again before letting his weight drop onto you in resignation. Or relief. “I mean that.”

“Then… Those three months…”

“One day, I’ll tell you everything,” he offers, making you wonder what the hell he’s been through in the past. And if it has something to do with that guitar he smashed to pieces. “But from now on, you can be here whatever you want.” 

Many things have shifted tonight. As if an earthquake had upturned everything between the both of you, only peace has settled in its wake. A peace you had never felt before. As you brush fingers through his hair, you joke, “So I can come to those parties you host, too?” 

“Those weren’t my idea, by the way. Jimin made me.” Kissing your shoulder, Yoongi continues to admit, “He was worried. And hoping you would show.”

Oh. That’s news to you. 

“I knew you wouldn’t. But.” He exhales before nestling in further. “I did hope to see you, too.” 

“It’s okay.” You rub the back of his neck, your fingers feeling nothing but warmth and the softness of his clothes. “It would’ve been too obvious.”

“What would’ve.”

“That I wanted you all to myself.”

“You already have that.”

When you stiffen, your words are tiny. “You know what I mean.”

Yoongi laughs soft, taking one of your hands in his and bringing it up for a kiss as you blurt, “My brother was the one that invited me. To come to those, I mean.”

The way he blinks is comical. “Huh.”

“I know.” It’s your turn to bring his hand close, kissing along his knuckles before you stare out the window behind him. “It makes me wonder if he knows.”

“What if he does?”

You snap your eyes right to his. “Does he?”

Yoongi watches your lips linger on his fingers before he tells the truth, “No.”

“Okay. But you’re sure I can stay?” 

“Who do you think you bought those groceries for?” 

Oh. Wait. “What?” 

Grinning so sly, Yoongi reveals the plan he had all along, “I get you for a week, right?”

Oh. Holy shit. You cannot quite possibly deal with what this man is saying. That whole time you were shopping for his list… No wonder he was already done with dinner when you got there oh you’re gonna get him back for that. 

Light bursts from your center as you grit out through a grin, “You sneaky little—” Pulling his tilted mouth in for another kiss, your heart pulses little pink stars as he leans in with a laugh, and you meet lips again and again until he slowly, reluctantly stops. 

“One day,” he murmurs out of nowhere, and you flick your eyes to his. “I’ll be better.”

Of course he will. You have no doubts. But, just like he always does for you, you’re gonna start offering the same reassurance out loud, even if he knows it’s there. 

And you can’t contain your little laughs at your own joke, despite him just staring into your face right after you crack it, “Don’t make it just one day, silly.” 

Even if you’re very serious, it’s in your nature to lighten things up. Especially after hearing such wonderful news for what’s coming. Clutching a little bit of his shirt, you whisper with complete devotion, 

“We’ll make it as many as we can.”

You hate how you feel him freeze, knowing what that means, what plaguing little thoughts are embedded in that tiny shift. 

Yoongi’s still hesitant to accept.

Because you are, too. In many ways. But this man has been picking you up and making you stronger day after day—in both his presence and absence—that you can’t help but fight to do the same. 

Does he ever think about you? Does he know that you’ll always be with him? No matter how close or far apart you are? You hope so. Because it’s so true that your heart is searing that promise into your soul, branding it as a reminder to reciprocate all this genuine love you’ve never been given before.

He loves you?

You still can’t accept that as fact.

…Maybe one day.

You chuckle to yourself, deciding to keep talking because Yoongi is still so very quiet. “At least. Until the day I get to meet my cat,” you huff in triumph. “Then I’m running away with her.”

It’s a perfect strike of a match. “Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.” You pretend to pout. “But I’m starting to think she ran away already and you won’t fess up.”

Yoongi laughs so suddenly you flinch. After a playful scoff, he tries to make you feel better, “She’s still here!”

“Lies.”

“How much are you betting, doll.”

“How much are you willing to lose, babe.”

“This much,” he finally says, pinching your sides and hissing laughter when you scream. “Maybe I’ll make you leave after all if you’re gonna be a problem.” 

“You did threaten to kick me out before.” 

“Huh? When?”

“That day I showed up,” you remind him through a chuckle. Thrown back to that first night, you start to see all the parallels between then and now. And how vastly different things have become. “Said you were gonna kick me out for hustling you.” 

The glorious laughter from the depths of his belly makes you grin, and you cringe when his brows pinch in both laughter and pain. “I should’ve!” 

He needs to get those hits healed. “You really should’ve.” 

“Played me from the very start. You happy with yourself?” When you nod, Yoongi shakes his head. “Course you are.” 

“You love it.” 

“I do.” Your eyes meet, which proves dangerous for you because he bites his smirk before pulling you in for a kiss. “Thought I was gonna say it, huh.” 

“No!” You lie. Because no, you certainly were not! “…Maybe.” 

“Guess what.” 

Suddenly paranoid, you give him a look, already expecting to be tricked again. 

But Yoongi captures your lips without warning, curling your toes into sheets you’re now achingly familiar with. After a few passes, he shifts above, planting a hand at your side and letting his chain slide against your chest as he slots a leg in between yours. 

Yet again, you think about that first night, that first time. The first of apparently, surprisingly, wonderfully unexpectedly many. 

Who would’ve thought rain and a broken ego would bloom into something good? Who would’ve believed a person so close to your roots would be your home? 

As he lets up with one last slow stroke of his tongue, you whisper, “What were you gonna say?” 

At this, Yoongi spreads closed lips, taking his time planting a peck on your nose. “I just fucking love you, doll.” 

Oh. He’s a menace and the most annoying tease on the planet. 

When you can’t do anything but flee into his chest, Yoongi immediately laughs, forcing you back out of your little shell. “You can’t hide now, babe.” 

“I can!” 

Leaned forward in your struggle, you give him no choice but to swoop his head into your neck. Which backfires on you immensely because he decides it’s the perfect time to rasp deep against your ear, “I love fucking you, too.” 

His name flies out of your mouth in disbelief and embarrassment, and his heightened amusement puffs into the burning column below your chin. 

This is the moment something comes over you. Slams into you. Washes you in present nostalgia like lingering footsteps on a balcony. 

And it hurts. It really, really hurts. 

Instead of laughing along, you come down from your high, squeezing him like the pillow that couldn’t replicate his warmth for months. “I miss you.”

After a second, Yoongi questions, “How? I’m right here.”

You know that. You do. But with every hello there’s a goodbye, and you don’t want that this time. Especially now that your heart knows that his beats the same. 

Breathy and shaken, you rest your head in his chest, hoping he doesn’t hear but does at the same time, “I still miss you.”

Strong fingers weakly press into your sides, and while you can’t see him, you know for a fact that his smile is gone. Because he also knows goodbye is coming again, and you can’t stay here forever as long as this is all a secret. 

You feel a sigh wisp over your head before words that make no fucking sense follow it out, “I can’t do shit like this anymore.” 

…What?

No. No no no he can’t be done just like that you both just confessed everything you need to fight say something anything anything—

“I wanna do this the right way.” 

Oh. 

Yoongi’s chest… It’s shaking. 

Pushing yourself up, you search his eyes for answers. “What are you saying?” 

When he looks at you, there’s a fire in his eyes that wasn’t there before. Or maybe it has been there all along, and he only needed a spark to set it ablaze. “I’m saying I’ll tell him, doll. Just me.” 

Oh. Oh, shit. Didn’t he say not yet? Didn’t he say he needs more time? He said he’d figure it out what is with the sudden…

Your tears are automatic as Yoongi roams his gaze from one eye to the other, and he’s swallowing before taking a step. A step you didn’t think he’d make. One you didn’t have the courage to take yourself. 

When he utters the words, your soul lets rain fall just as the storm resides.

And right as moonlight shines through his blinds.

“I’ll tell him everything.” 

-

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tbc. :)

-

so... how did it go! | join the server!

a/n: so. here we are, over two years and 250k+ words later. thank you for sticking with me if you're still here, and thank you for being the most amazing readers a writer could ever, ever ask for. if you can interact or let me know what you enjoyed/like, i would be eternally grateful. these two parts took all of me, and i'm gonna take a break for a little bit before starting on the next part. a/n 2: thank you for also being here despite the highs and lows! things have really weighed on me for awhile, which prevented me from working on this part forreal. but my mental feels a lot lighter now, and i am ready to keep running with y'all. so thank you for your support and encouragement, no matter how you show it! ++ feedback box: ⇥ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated! ⇥ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think! ⇥ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. it’s literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as you’d like! ⇥ here! ++ more links: ⇥ masterlist  ⇥ three tangerines masterlist

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[stevieschrodinger]

Link to Part Two

Part One

Eddie stares down at the plastic doodad. It proudly declares the word ‘pregnant’ on the little screen, cheerily oblivious to the fact that it's just ruined Eddie’s whole fucking life. It’s a word as well, the actual fucking word, ‘pregnant’ shown oh so confidently on the little screen. Eddie’s done a test before, one time when he had a scare as a teenager, that had been the sort that showed one line or two.

One lines for not, two for...are. Two would have looked like prison bars, which would have been ironic given being saddled with a pup is probably pretty equivalent to 25 to life.

Anyway. Eddie shakes it. Looks again. Throws the fucking thing in the bin.

Well fuck.

Eddie contemplates, very very briefly, getting rid of it. His mind and body recoil from that thought the same way it would from, like, rotted tuna. Or someone else's puke. Or like...salad.

Eddie’s Omega’s got a lot of needs and no Alpha willing to fill them. Eddie gets by, fobbing his Omega off with with a couple of short term friends with benefits arrangements and the odd one night stand. Mostly his Omega can’t tell the difference between having an Alpha and having any Alpha, so he makes do. It scratches the itch.

Unfortunately, that means this pup could have been fathered by any one of three dudes, and Eddie doesn’t have a fucking clue which of them it would be. Eddie would really rather not it be Alpha A, Alpha B is a piece of work with a big dick, and what's behind door number three would be potentially catastrophic.

Anyway. Eddie makes a decision at two am in his apartment bathroom, and it starts with two text messages, an email, and a phone call.

“Thanks for doing this so on the spur man,” Eddie tells his landlord as he hands over the keys. Ex landlord. It was only a room in a shared place. Had to share the bathroom on this floor with two other dudes, but, meh. It had been perfect for what Eddie needed, and more importantly, within Eddie’s budget.

His whole life is sitting in the back of his van, barely filling a third of the back. Which is ideal really, made clearing out quick and easy and Eddie’s uncertain about weather or not he should be doing any heavy lifting right now.

He makes three stop offs before he leaves for good, shifting the very last of his product at discount prices. He mournfully throws in his last two boxes of cigs with the last deal; going cold turkey is going to be the opposite of fun, but Eddie’s in it to win it, and he’s going to try his best as of right now.

Wayne already has the door open when Eddie hops out of his van, beer in hand, eyebrow raised, “heya old man.”

When Wayne sees Eddie dragging bags out, he lifts the brim of his cap, puts it back again, and heads inside. Eddie sees him move a couple of things out of Eddie’s old room, and although it’s empty and the bed is stripped to nothing, it’s untouched, “how long you back for?” Wayne asks him, offering a beer.

Eddie looks at the offered bottle, dripping condensation, and very pointedly doesn’t take it “so, about that.”

There’s a long drawn out moment, and Eddie’s sees the realization dawn, “oh Ed.”

“You like kids!”

Wayne sighs, pulls Eddie into a hug, “I just hope they sleep better’n you did. Don’t think I can go through that again.”

Eddie snorts a laugh into Wayne’s shoulder, all relieved. He hadn't doubted for a second that Wayne would back his play, Wayne's always been unshakably team Eddie, but to hear it said in no uncertain terms is still a huge weight lifted.

Eddie’s got a slightest curve of a bump, small enough that it’s not nearly noticeable yet, especially with Eddie’s usual wardrobe. To go along with his bump, he’s got a scan booked at the Omega Health place, an insatiable craving for garlic mushrooms, and a job.

An actual honest job. Alright, a temp job, because he’s pregnant and no one in their right mind is going to hire a pregnant Omega for a full time permanent gig. So he is, conveniently enough, covering maternity leave for a beta girl at the record store. But that doesn’t matter right now, the moons aligned, and Eddie jumped at the opportunity. He’s going to have a secure pay check for the next seven or so months, and right this second, that’s what counts.

He can’t drink. He can’t smoke. He can’t do drugs and he’s most certainly not going to party. Eddie does the next best thing he can think of; he goes to the library. This is his reward now, his fun, his safe space; he’s going to reward himself with a good book. A good free book.

Turns out registering himself for a library card is a ten minute thing, and then he’s done, bit of plastic in hand, he wonders the shelves looking for the fantasy section. He rounds the corner into the main room only to find a dude reading and signing along to a bunch of little kids. He has the book propped up on a thing to keep his hands free and the pages open so the kids can see.

He’s encouraging them to sign along with a bunch of the words.

He has good hair...like, really good hair. There’s something familiar about the guy that Eddie can't place...until he does.

Holy fucking shit. That’s King Steve.

And he’s in a library...wearing fucking gold rimmed spectacles and a sweater vest.

And he’s hot. He’s still hot. He laughs at something and leans forward to help a toddler with the placement of her chubby little fingers and Eddie’s ovaries fucking explode.

He walks away. For self preservation he walks away. He forgets what he just saw because there was no way it was real. He’s been going through a dry spell, hasn’t got laid since he moved back to Hawkins and now he’s seeing mirages of his high school crush, that’s all.

That’s all it can be.

Until Eddie goes to the fancy scanner machine to check out his little pile of four paperback fantasy books and a deep Alpha voice is asking if he needs anything and he’s, like, right there. And he smells of library and Alpha and whatever nice thing he washes his fucking sweater vests in.

Jesus.

“No,” Eddie squeaks, “I’m okay.”

“Eddie?” Steve frowns at him, tilting his read and looking over the top of his glasses in a way that should be fucking criminal, “Eddie Munson right? I thought you moved away?”

“I have. Did. I mean, I did do that. Previously. Back now. Clearly.” Shut up shut up shut up and Steve can probably smell his embarrassment because he’s standing closely enough to clearly scent Eddie and Steve’s senses must be absolutely pinpoint because his eyes drop to Eddie’s stomach, then spring up to his neck. He frowns, like, the tiniest bit.

Eddie’s pregnant, and unmated, and Steve’s clocked that in about four seconds flat which, great. Humiliation complete.

But Steve’s face clears as quick as it had clouded, the whole thing passing so fast Eddie’s now not even sure he saw it, “so it’d been cool to catch up, you wanna wait a minute, I’m just about to have lunch?”

“Errr…I mean. I wouldn't want to impose or anything-”

“Steve!” And holy shit, if Steve is the ghost of Christmas past or some shit, the second ghost just rocked up in the form of Robin fucking Buckley of all people. Eddie doesn't even understand why they’re even friends, Steve was a topnotch jock and a total fucking dickwad, and Buckley was a band nerd.

This makes less sense than Steve’s sweater vest.

“Yeah, come on Eddie, lets go sit outside,” Eddie gets tugged along in their wake, somehow, and ends up sitting on a bench outside in the sun.

Robin had a bag of take out in her hand which she gives to Steve, and he takes out a carton of something that instantly makes Eddie’s mouth water, Eddie looks back up in time to catch Steve widening his eyes at Robin, tilting his head off to the side sharply in silent gesture for her to fuck off over there. She signs something, real quick. Steve nods.

Eddie doesn’t know a single lick of sign language, but he's pretty sure that even if he did, what happened was so fast he would have missed it anyway, “so, Eddie, great to see you, but I, shit, pretty sure I’ve left the...stove on.”

Eddie frowns at the take out and back to Robin but before he can point out what a steaming pile of bullshit that is, she’s already power walking off and shouting, “byyyyeeeeeeeeeeeee.”

“I, ah, got garlic mushrooms and broccoli and some stirfry-”

It’s too late for Eddie. He’s done. Stick a fork in him. He has no idea what’s happening here but he zones in on the garlic mushroom part of that like a heat seeking missile. A secondary part of his brain is screaming loudly that the Alpha has provided, the Alpha wants to share his food with Eddie. Alpha Alpha Alpha.

Eddie takes the container and the bamboo spork thing Steve hands him, “sorry, I never get chopsticks, no fucking clue how to use them.”

“I can show you,” Eddie says, without thinking it through or registering the implication or stopping to swallow, which means he just spoke with his mouth full of food.

“I’d like that,” Steve tells him, “when can I take you out for dinner?”

Which, Eddie’s brain does stall out there. Because. Well. Lots of things. But he was pretty certain Steve had clocked his specific circumstances earlier, but now he’s not so sure, “I’m pupped,” his mouth supplies without his permission, so he shoves a whole thing of broccoli in there to try and stop it happening again.

Steve hums, eating his beef thing very neatly, “no bite though,” he points out, and Eddie makes an agreeable noise, “maybe we can fix that,” Eddie nearly chokes.

#eddie munson #steve harrington #stranger things #steddie #omega eddie because he's so pretty #mpreg #alpha steve harrington

[joifee]

Here are both my pieces for the @bdubszine !!!!! Such a great opportunity to run with it and just have fun with detail work.

I am in love with sungod bdubs and very proud of this piece with the improv class^^

Down below is some in depth talk for the first piece with bdubs and all his clocks :D

The one on his chest is a regular minecraft clock - he always carries one in his offhand. In the background his his big tower from his "building with bdubs" series. He is wearing his moss cloak. On his wirst: A clock with a horse: he loves horses. also it actually is inspired by the horse-mountain he build in season 9 of hermitcraft A purple clock with ears: a purple panda clock. He joined one mcc (minecraft championship) and one it first try on the team called purple pandas) A tnt block-clock: Season 7 of hermitcraft he had, alongside impulse and tango, a company called "the boomers" who would explode stuff with tnt for diamonds - bdubs stick was he would die in every blow up they do (there are compilations)

in his jacket: The clock looking like a ring: reference to double life. He was soul-bonded to impulse and they lowkey roleplayed as a married couple and impulse gifted him a clock as a sign or marriage. therefore it looks like a ring. it also has "i" pointers because impulse always puts "i"s on his stuff A regular alarm clock: Basically that - maybe a reference for him always sleeping through the night. The red glasses clock: reference to season 8. He, tango and keralis based together and called themself "big eyes crew" and they all wore red glasses Emerald shaped clock: season 9 as the right hand to king rendog (theres also a crown inside the shape) emeralds because rendog and bdubs wanted to change currency to royal emeralds which started a war on the server and led to rendogs execution. bdubs stayed loyal till the end "hep" clock: Season 7. He plays right hand man to mayor scar. There was a turfwar between two groups - one wanted their main island to be mycelium the other wanted it to be grass. HEP was the group who wanted grassblocks so its a grassblocked shaped clock. they lost the war clock with a snake: 3rd life reference. Inside the clock theres a castle "the crastle" which was his and cleos base in 3rd life. The snake stands for cleo. the heart is part of the logo for the traffic series (same btw count for the heart in the impulse ring) sundial: reference to the hermitcraftxempires smp crossover. bdubs came to empires smp and announced himself as "the sungod" and basically became a god and gem, oli, fwhip and sausage were his followers for the short time. the shape is after a build sausage made in his name the "B" sign: reference to last life. He was part of team B.E.S.T. and they had shields with their initials aka Bdubs, Etho, Skizzlman and Tango. The four hearts are the lifes he was given at the start of the series half tnt clock: reference to ethoslab who is his best friend on hermitcraft and they are just unnormal about each other messed up steam punk clock: reference to the create series he did with keralis, tango, scar and zedaph who unfortunatly was short lived mcc coin: the coin he got for winning mcc broken heart monitor clock: limited life. there's a heart monitor and digital clock. the clock is broken because bdubs didnt uploaded his view for limited life (at the time of drawing this piece) so we never new how much time he had left (we know now) small pocket watch with snake and wings: also limited life. he teamed up with scar (the wings) and cleo (the snake) tree clock: the tree of whimsey. one of his first builds of season 9. he crowned tango as parkour king, cub as royal magican/dragonslayer and ren as king under it

rest of the smaller clocks are filler

#bdoubleo100 #bdubs #bdouble100 fanart #hermitcraft #traffic smp #hermitcraft x empires #joifeeart #fandom zine #great chance to join a zine #i had lots of fun #check out the zine if you havent yet

[adventuringblind]

Hi, would you be able to write Oscar Piastri x Shy!reader. Maybe she’s absolutely stunning so other drivers go up to her and flirt with her but she doesn’t respond. Then they see her with Oscar and are a bit shocked.

Thanks 🤍✨

Shy

Oscar Piastri x reader

Genre: Fluff

Request: yes :)

Summary: Sometimes being shy makes people want to know more

Warnings: terrible flirting

Notes: I cracked myself up writing this because I am terrible at fluffy things. I love it.

Masterlist

To say you're shy is not exactly the word you would use. More like... particular.

Your words are few, and you like talking to the people who matter most in your life. Mingling at parties is not something you get joy out of.

When your friend decided to drag you out for the night, you were already frustrated. Even more so when everyone seemed to want to talk to you about their personal lives and amazing achievements.

Then there was Oscar.

You hid from the party in a quiet corner. The breath you'd been holding finally escaping through your teeth. Until He came around the corner.

His stupidly pretty eyes and fluffy hair caught you off guard. You blame the alcohol you had to help you get through this event.

"I take you your not one for parties?"

You wanted to say something snarky and sarcastic. But his voice was far to pleadent to let you do such a thing.

"It's okay, I'm not either, wanna get out of here?"

A simple proposal that changed everything. Oscar kept conversation going, and if you didn't feel like talking, he didn't care.

Sometimes, you would just bask in the comforting silence of each other. Words became unnecacry.

He obviously made the first move as you were far too shy to attempt an advance.

You blushed a lovely shade of red when he kissed you the first time.

And now you're here, traveling the world with him as much as possible, watching him race. It's funny how things work out.

You spend time walking around the paddock looking for the few friends you'd made. Lando being one of them. He teased you and Oscar relentlessly because of how private you are. The papaya colored Brit seemed to be the only one who knew you two were dating.

Other drivers had asked on multiple occasions if you were with Lando. The majority of them thought you were someone's relative and tried to hit on you.

The awful pick-up lines were becoming a running joke in the McLaren garage.

Finally, it became too much for you. The reporters wanted to know who you were. The drivers would nit leave you be despite your best attempts at politely telling the to 'fuck off.' And the fans were starting to get out of hand.

"You sure you want to do this? If your not comfortable with it I can always talk with the PR team."

"Yes, but this way will make them all shut up."

"Fair point."

You walk into the paddock with the two papaya boys that day. Again, you could see people's wheels turning.

Oscar dragged you to one of the skysports reporters, knowing they would be the best ones to get their point across.

Lando pulls his phone out to record, and Daniel, Esteban, and Carlos, who'd been trying to win you over, sidle up next to him. Confused as to why you're standing with Oscar, your hands intertwined.

"Oscar, it's great to see you! Can I ask who the lovely lady standing with you is?" Greets an enthusiastic Laura Winters. You'd always liked her the most.

"Actually, Laura, if it's alright with you, I have a request."

Laura eyes him skeptically as he whispers something in her ear. She nods enthusiasticly, which is a good sign to you.

Oscar turns to you and takes your hands in his. You were expecting him to kiss you. Prepared for it all week. You'd already deleted your social media.

It's a real shock when he gets down on one knee, pulling a box out of his pocket.

Lando is squealing in excitement. The drivers next to him stand frozen, their mouth hanging wide.

You mimick that.

"So I know we planned to just kiss so everyone would finally leave you alone, but I thought this would be even better." A blush creeps across his face, and Laura is grinning so widely you think it might fall off. "I've known since pretty early on that I wanted to spend my life with you, regardless of if anyone says we're too young. I've never cared what they thought, and I'm not starting now. You are the most amazing person I've had the pleasure of meeting. Your witty comments reserved only for me make me feel incredibly lucky. You make me feel important, and I hope I make you feel the same. I want that, forever and always. So, marry me?"

Just like with most times in your life, words don't come easy. You manage to squeak a quiet yes, barely Audible to anyone but Oscar. But he's trained his ears to hear everything you say.

He places the ring on your finger and spins you around in utter joy, landing a perfectly placed and loving kiss to your lips.

Everyone is clapping for you, and you couldn't be happier than I'm this moment. The rest of the world is falling away.

The drivers next to Lando are still processing.

"Did we ever have a chance?" Asks Daniel finally.

Lando snickers. "Afriad not, mate. She's been trying to tell you guys, and you didn't take her reactions as a hint. Looks like you wasted your time on a girl who had her heart stolen."

#x reader #fanficion #f1 fic #formula one #formula 1 #racing #angst #max verstappen #f1 fanfic #charles leclerc x reader #oscar piastri x y/n #oscar #oscar piastri f1 #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri #oscar piastri imagine #op81 #lando norris f1 #lando norris x you #lando norris x y/n #lando norris x reader #lando norris #mclaren f1 #mclaren racing #mclaren formula 1 #mclaren #papaya #daniel riccardo x reader #carlos sainz x reader

[scribbledghost]

Simon "Ghost" Riley SFW Alphabet

Because I've seen some NSFW Alphabets floating around, but not a SFW one. And I wanted to do some more character study on him.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

This heavily depends on the setting. Out in public, he's not particularly affectionate at all beyond maybe a hand on your lower back to guide you somewhere or a hand in yours if you're sitting next to each other. But when you're home alone? He's a Koala Man. Loves laying with his head on your chest, listening to your heartbeat. 100% does that thing where he'll stand next to you while you're doing something and keep a hand in your back pocket. Also I love the idea that if you're shorter than him, he loves it when you sort of lean back on him so he can rest his chin on your head.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

The friendship starts. Reluctantly lmao. I can see it going one of two ways: either 1. It's an "Extrovert adopts the introvert without said introvert providing any input" situation, or 2. You just sort of sit in his proximity quietly for long enough and afterwards he's like "yes they are my best friend. No we have not spoken more than 5 words to each other." But, like in a romantic relationship, he's fiercely loyal. Ride or die. He wants his friends safe. Very good at giving advice, but does not sugar coat anything. If you're being a dumbass, he'll tell you.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

For the most part, yes. Sometimes he gets into certain moods where he doesn't really want to be touched, but those are fairly rare and usually triggered by some sort of outside event. And again, he doesn't cuddle unless it's just the two of you (he may put an arm around you when the rest of the team is there, but he won't fully wrap you up). The way he cuddles is... encompassing lol. That's the only way I can describe it. He likes having his arms wrapped around you, likes having you close to him. Being a giant weighted blanket for you is good too. In a way, having you near is soothing for him. He knows you're there, he knows he's got you, and he knows your safe.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I imagine he would like to settle down, but at first the idea of being so close and vulnerable with someone else spooks him. Once he comes around to the idea though, and once someone manages to break through his emotional defenses, he's down for it. Probably likes to imagine a nice house with a yard and a dog, though honestly he's okay with a simple apartment/flat too, as long as he's with the right person. He's very good at cleaning, the military and him living alone for so long made sure of that. Cooking though... he's decent. Don't expect gourmet, but he knows a thing or two. Cannot bake to save his life though. If it's anything more complicated than what comes in a box with instructions, he's hopeless.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Quickly and efficiently. He doesn't see any reason to drag things out or beat around the bush about it. And he's not the type to do the whole "break-up-make-up" thing, either. You get one breakup with Simon, that's it. He won't give an opportunity for there to be another. He'll tell you that you need to have a conversation, say that it isn't working out, and that he wishes you the best. Done and done. If you really poke and prod him about it, he'll give you specifics as to why it didn't work, but don't expect him to sugarcoat it.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Here's the way I see it: he wants it. Badly. He wants the ring on your finger and the exclusivity and the legal status of it (particularly so you could be taken care of if something were to ever happen to him in the field). But he's terrified of it. He's terrified of turning into his father, terrified of recreating the cycle he grew up in. If you really, really want marriage, he'll work on coming around to it, but if you're ambivalent towards it or don't want it, he's absolutely fine with that. As for how soon he'd want it, I'd say a few years minimum. He probably starts thinking about it much, much sooner, but it takes those several years for him to work through his own feelings on it.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He's incredibly, incredibly gentle physically. Out in the field, he's a machine, and a very efficient one at that, but he doesn't want to be that way at home. One of his biggest fears is accidentally hurting you. He's witnessed so much violence through his life that he refuses to continue it if he can help it (military job notwithstanding). As for emotionally, he's a bit less gentle, but that doesn't mean he's cruel by any means. Just a bit more blunt and to the point. The only time he's particularly harsh is when he's been tipped over the edge after a lot of pushing, or if something happens to scare him.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

From you? He loves them. From anyone else? Hard no. He has no problem with you hugging him as often as you want, though he won't really return them much unless it's just the two of you or only the team around (exceptions are made if he catches someone looking a bit too closely at you). When you're alone, he's hugging you all the time. Especially from behind. His hugs are very warm, and they have a tendency to make you feel safe and secure. Also the type to give that intermittent squeeze while hugging you, the kind that sort of squishes you a little bit.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He doesn't lmao. Straight up Does Not. This doesn't mean he doesn't love you - he does. He just... really dislikes using that phrase to say as much. He finds it overused and diluted. He much prefers to tell you in other ways, like telling you that you mean the world to him, or reminding you that you're everything to him. Plus, to give credit where credit is due, his go-to pet name for you is "love". He uses it more than your actual name. There are a couple of certain, very specific scenarios in which he will actually say the words "I love you", but quite frankly they're not scenarios that either of you want to be in.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

I don't know if I'd say he gets "jealous" so much as "protective". He does tend to feel some type of way if he catches someone getting a bit too close (be it staring too much, getting handsy, etc), especially if he can tell it's making you uncomfortable. This is usually when his reservations on PDA sort of go out the window. If someone starts encroaching, he'll crowd into your space, put his arms around you, press a kiss to your cheek through his mask. Those sorts of things. Or he'll just straight-up menace the offending party and tell them to get lost and that you're not interested. Whether or not his threatening aura goes too far depends mostly on your definition.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Most of the time, they're very soft. He doesn't get too wild with them unless he's been gone for a while or he's particularly riled up. He does like to tease by kissing you with the mask still on though (and it was how your first kiss went - he pressed his mask to your cheek). Once you're more established, he likes to lift the mask to kiss your lips and shoulders specifically, though he frequently kisses your temple and forehead as well. As for him, he has a particular weakness for you kissing his knuckles for some reason. He isn't sure why. Though of course, he'll never deny you if you want to press a kiss to his lips.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He's very, very gentle with them. He knows he's prone to scaring children, especially the younger ones, but he does his best to mitigate that by speaking softly and making himself seem smaller. Definitely feels guilty when he accidentally makes one of them cry (Unfortunately, this happens frequently with babies. Big Man In A Mask can be scary). He'll play with them if they ask, pick them up if they want, etc. For some reason, while he tends to make infants cry, he seems to be a magnet for toddlers. It's like they look at him and see a free jungle gym.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Truthfully, when he's at home, he likes to take his time. He's awake at the crack of dawn, just because he's used to military wakeup times by now. But he by no means gets out of bed when he wakes up, especially when you're with him. Prefers to lie in as long as you'll let him, and by that I mean he prefers to lie there as long as you'll let him hold you. Kinda cranky in the mornings tbh. Doesn't like waking up to a lot of sound or action around him. He does that enough when he's on the job, he'd prefer to avoid it when he's home.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Tries to keep a decent routine so his schedule doesn't get too far out of whack. Doesn't eat past a certain time, and enjoys unwinding about an hour or so before bed with a book or quiet conversation. He won't force you to adhere to the same bedtime he has, but he will readily admit that it's harder for him to fall asleep when you're not there with him. An absolute sucker for spending some time with his head on your chest, bonus points if you sort of massage his scalp at the same time. However, when it comes to actually sleeping, he prefers to be the big spoon.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Gonna have to have an ungodly amount of patience and wait for his level 10 friendship for this one lmfao. Even then, there's certain things that he simply will never tell you. He will never go into particular detail about his upbringing, aside from letting you know his father was a rat bastard who's better off in the ground. He doesn't give you details about his work, though that is purely for your safety. After enough time (and I mean ENOUGH time), he'll tell you about his mother and brother, and even then, he doesn't really talk about their fates other than something along the lines of "they got hurt because of me".

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

I headcanon that he's actually peeved sort of easily, but it takes a lot for him to show it. And even then, he does his best to keep a very tight leash on it. The most he usually does is get quiet and broody. I do believe that he absolutely does not yell, though. Not in anger. He'll quietly seethe, but he does not raise his voice. He may sort of slam a hand or fist down on a nearby surface if he's really ticked and not thinking clearly, but even then he immediately regrets it. And absolutely, 100% never raises a hand towards you. Ever. The idea of you ever being afraid of him for any reason absolutely destroys him.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

His memory is, for the most part, very sharp. Dates for things like anniversaries are always remembered. He may not remember every little detail you mention in passing, but he remembers the important things. If you offhandedly mention needing something bought or done, he's on it. And if you mention anything about your past or who/how you are as a person, he definitely remembers that as well. But if you offhandedly mention you have an appointment or something the following week, he may or may not remember by the time it rolls around.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

The first time he let you take off his mask. You'd seen each half of his face separately (aside from his nose, somehow - that seemed to always be covered no matter what), but you had yet to see his entire face at the same time. He remembers gently taking your hands and putting them at the bottom of his mask, telling you quietly that you could remove it. He still remembers how slowly you did so - as if you were waiting for him to change his mind. And he will always remember how you softly called him beautiful once the mask was off.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

VERY PROTECTIVE. Woof woof bark bark scary dog privileges etc. To be honest, his menacing aura is enough to deter any would-be offenders 90% of the time. A stern look from him is usually enough to scare people away. But if they're more bold (or stupid), he has no problem lowering his voice and issuing thinly-veiled threats. If the time ever comes that he needs to physically protect you from an immediate danger, he can be a damn vision. Efficient, cold, calculated. Laser-focused on your safety and nothing else, consequences be damned. Quite frankly, there are few places on the planet that you'd be safer than with Simon Riley.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He puts in as much effort as he can. He knows he's away a lot, and he does his best to make up for that when he's at home. Granted, he doesn't "nail it" every single time, simply because he's... not used to this. Sometimes he forgets certain things (not dates, but perhaps small details), but it's not often. But he truly, genuinely tries his best, and it really is obvious. His love language is acts of service, so everyday tasks are his wheelhouse when he's around. You can usually count on coming home from work to a tidy home, dinner on the stove, and a kiss to your temple as he asks if you'd like for him to run you a bath or shower.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Actual habits? Probably smoking and drinking. Also probably doesn't wash his masks as often as he should, so. Don't put your nose too close to them for an extended period of time. He's just nose-blind to it at this point. For ugly behaviors, I can see him having to keep a very close eye on his possessiveness. Any time you go out without him, he has to restrain himself from sticking a GPS tracker on your car or in your pocket. Any time you introduce him to friends or family, he's subconsciously analyzing them to see if they're a threat. He doesn't mean to, and he feels guilty once he realizes what he's doing, but it's an innate behavior at this point. But, if left unchecked, he could definitely become overprotective to a toxic degree.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Not particularly. He knows he's attractive, but he doesn't really do anything to draw attention to it or maintain it. Most of his face is hidden the vast majority of the time, anyway. He does work out on the regular, though this is more to keep him fit in the field than for vanity's sake. He does tend to shave daily and keep his hair trimmed neat, but again, that's mostly because it would make the mask more uncomfortable otherwise. (I do headcanon that he likes to exaggerate his vanity around his partner though. Just to see if he can fluster them lol).

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

At first? Not really. He's an independent loner who hesitates when having to rely on others. But once you worm your way into his heart and really get to know him? Once he really lets you in? He doesn't really know how to exist without you anymore. You don't have to be right next to him all the time, but once he's yours, he doesn't know any other way to be anymore. It's like you're a part of him then, like you've made a home in his ribcage and if you were to leave (or, heaven forbid, be taken from him), you'd take a massive part of him with you. He feels like he'd turn into a hollowed out shell of himself if he lost you.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

You see parts of his face separately long before you see his face in its entirety. First, it's just his eyes. Then, maybe his hair when he only wears a standard facemask. At one point you spot his mouth when he lifts his balaclava up so he can take a drink or smoke (or so he can kiss you). Letting you see his face - his entire face, all at once - is a big deal for Simon. It's something he doesn't give to everyone. In fact, he doesn't really give it to anyone. The only people who have seen it in recent years are certain medics, his team, and you.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He wouldn't like a partner who is... too pushy? idk how to put it. But don't come into the relationship thinking you can fix him or change him. Simon knows he carries more baggage than a metropolitan airport. He's aware. He'll start working through it when he's good and ready, and not a second sooner. Try and force him on that front, and you'll quickly push him away. I also headcanon that he wants nothing to do with someone who's quick to be outwardly angry. If you're the type who yells easily, stomps around, slams doors, etc, then it's absolutely not gonna work out.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He sleeps very lightly. He's awake at the smallest jolt of movement. Also a very quiet sleeper. To the point where sometimes you have to watch for the rise and fall of his chest because you start to worry he's not breathing. In addition: it takes a lot of trust for him to fall asleep around you. He's definitely not the type to doze off around strangers. Because of this, he tends to take most night watches when out in the field until he gets so exhausted he can't fight the sleep anymore. But once he's home with you and you're with him, he's out like a light.

#simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #ghost scribbles

[sadprose-auroras]

Distraction – Hazel Callahan x reader

Hey, loves! Thank you everyone for all of the love for On Top, I appreciate it so much!! I’m happy to take requests, just send me an ask <3

Content: violence, cursing, kissing.

Summary: Have you ever wanted to be PJ in this scene? Me too! So, I rewrote the final scene as a self-insert. Most dialogue is from the movie.

Please let me know what you think! Word Count: 2.2k

“Oh, now you want a bomb.”

------------------------------------------------------------

Holding your breath, you watched Hazel set up the bomb on the tree across the field. You could only cross your fingers that it would work properly; the last time did not go as expected.

“Hazel, it’s starting!” Annie shouts, as the football team begins to make their way onto the field. Panic setting in, you briefly consider running over to help her out. Suddenly, she’s sprinting over to the group, diving to take cover. You all bow your heads down, grabbing onto whoever is closest, holding your breath. You try not to think about Hazel’s head buried in your shoulder. Now is not the time. After a few moments, you all collectively raise your heads. It didn’t go off.

Everyone begins to talk over each other as Hazel starts fiddling with the remote.

“Maybe turn it on and then back off?”

“Why isn’t it working?”

“Did you set it to 15 minutes this time?”

You remain silent, eyes darting around trying to think of another solution.

“Okay, Plan B!” you say suddenly standing up. “We need to get the cheerleaders to make out with each other!” You begin to stalk over to the cheerleaders performing for the crowd, most of your friends following you. You briefly turn around to notice Josie crouched down looking at something and frown but decide to continue on your mission. You know how much this school fetishizes queer women. This has to work.

You all begin yelling, making cruse gestures.

“Guys, kiss each other!”

“Make out with each other!” Hazel shouts from the stands. Even your best friend saying the words ‘make out’ makes your knees weak. Despite the adrenaline of the situation, you still feel it. You feel every effect she has on you, always. The too-enthusiastic announcer comes over the loudspeaker, so loud it shakes the ground.

“HIDE YOUR CHILDREN, HERE COMES HUNTINGTON!”

Oh shit.

The yellow-clad team begins their entrance, and the crowd goes absolutely wild. The sense of dread that was gnawing at your stomach begins to grow. You have to do something. Now.

PJ nudges your side, giving you a knowing look. You furrow your brows. You were close, but you couldn’t read your friend’s mind.

“Go kiss her,” she says impatiently.

“Who?” you ask, your heart rate picking up.

“Oh my god, just do it! People will watch, trust me. Go, go!” You swallow heavily, your gaze meeting Hazel’s. Somehow, she understands exactly what your panicked, questioning eyes are asking. She gives the slightest nod. Blood rushing to your ears with nerves, you gather all the courage you have to walk over to her, pushing past some people in the crowd. You don’t look away from each other for a second.

“Can I kiss you?” you ask, voice barely above a whisper.

“Yes,” she says, a smile ghosting her lips. You slot your lips together gently, hands finding the sides of her face, hers settling on your waist. The feeling makes your head spin. It takes a few moments for you to find a rhythm, awkwardly bumping noses and hitting teeth a couple of times. Once you do though, desire spreads from the pit of your stomach to your entire body. You had no idea kissing could feel this good.

You’re vaguely aware of people shouting, “look!” clapping and looking at the two of you. Which is what you wanted, of course. It’s the only reason you were doing this in the first place… right? And yet, you didn’t care. About saving the football players, about being a distraction, about anything else. It truly felt like time was suspended and you were the only two people in the world.

As the kiss deepened, you moved closer, bodies pressing against one another. You can feel the coolness of Hazel’s rings on your skin as she thumbs at your hips, your shirt riding up. Just as you were thinking that you could do this forever, an announcement over the loudspeaker brought you back to reality.

“CAN EVERYBODY STOP LOOKING AT THE DYKE PARADE? WHO DO I HAVE TO BLOW TO GET THIS GAME STARTED ALREADY?”

You pull apart quickly, in sync as always, as Hazel’s big blue eyes bore into yours. You touch your lips, which are still tingling, as she rubs the back of her neck which she always does when she feels nervous.

You both rush down to rejoin the others, as they were all frantic about what you were going to do now.

“You guys kissed! With tongue!” Sylvie says, apparently very excited about it. You make eye contact with Hazel as she smirks, your stomach doing a little flip, before looking away.

“Yeah, and we could do it again, if necessary, I mean-if we need another distraction, y’know like I really feel like it worked…” Hazel trails off.

“It certainly worked for me,” you murmur, before you can think about what you’re saying.

“What?” Hazel asks. You open your mouth as if to answer, absolutely mortified, when Josie runs up to you all in a panic. You weirdly find yourself grateful for the distraction, albeit news of the life-threatening situation.

“Look, I found empty barrels of pineapple juice, they’re going to poison Jeff! Where the fuck could it be?” she says frantically, eyes wide. You all look at each other, realisation setting in.

“What if it’s in their mouths, and they’re going to swish it around, and then spit it out midgame?” PJ asks, and you bite back a laugh. You loved her, but sometimes she made no sense.

“I don’t think-“ you begin to say, when Hazel speaks up.

“I hate to say it, but it might have something to do with their semen,” she says, sounding genuinely concerned.

“No, it wouldn’t, what is wrong with you?” you ask, baffled but amused. Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Annie moving away from the group, looking out onto the field. You follow her gaze, realisation settling in at the same time.

“They’re gonna spray the field, we’re gonna have to run!” Annie shouts. You take off after her, muttering “oh god, oh shit, fuck fuck fuck, I have a stitch,” under your breath.

“It’s okay, we’ve got this,” Hazel says, voice surprisingly even despite how fast you were all running. You turn your head briefly to smile gratefully at her.

“Yeah, we do.”

“PJ, cover the sprinklers!” Josie yells, picking up Jeff, quite literally hoisting him over her shoulder and starting to run off the field. You were impressed at her strength. As if in slow motion, Huntington began moving towards you in formation. You took a deep breath, turning around to look at your group of friends. Isabel, Brittany and Stella Rebecca appeared seemingly out of nowhere, and you smiled to yourself. Huntington let out a scream in unison, and you all responded by doing the same. It was cathartic, quite frankly.

The next few moments were a blur. As the two groups came together, people paired off to fight each other. One particularly large football player came at you with his arms outstretched as if to push you over, but you dodged out of the way, then swung your elbow at the back of his head with a satisfying crack. He stumbles, coming at you with a raised fist, but he’s too slow. You duck as he misses, then, with all of your strength, you kick out your leg at his knees, knocking him over, hitting his head hard on the ground in the process.

You take the opportunity to glance around and notice that you’re actually winning. There are several Huntington players sprawled on the ground, unconscious, while all of your friends remained upright. (Albeit, covered in blood, but you were trying to be positive)

You scan to look for Hazel, and notice her holding a football helmet over her head, swinging it down on a Huntington player who is choking Tim. The guy rolls off him, and Tim coughs and stands up. You want to rush over to her, grab her, hold her, ask if she’s okay, protect her, before you’re suddenly tackled roughly to the ground by somebody behind you. You scream, try and scramble out of his grip, using your knees and legs to kick out, arms pushing at him, but nothing. He brings his fist down in the centre of your face, and you cry out. The pain is like nothing you’ve experienced. You lock eyes, and the wildness in the man’s eyes makes your heart sink. He wasn’t going to stop for anything.

Just as your life begins to flash behind your eyes, you hear Hazel yell your name, and she brings down the helmet with force on his head. You push him off you, as he lays there unconscious. You look up to Hazel in shock, panting heavily. Her eye is swollen red, blood splattered on her shirt, her hair is mused, and the stadium light just behind her head is casting a glow around her not dissimilar to a halo.

“Are you okay?” she asks, stretching her arm out to help you up. You take it, standing up with a grunt.

“I-yeah- th-thank you.” You notice you’re still holding hands, and drop it, both of you chuckling awkwardly. The brief respite from the dreaded feeling doesn’t last long when you notice a player twice Hazel’s size coming up behind her menacingly.

“Watch out!” You scream, grabbing her shoulders and moving her to the side as she stumbles slightly. Mustering everything you have, you roundhouse kick him with a yell of effort, aiming for his head but getting him in the neck instead. It doesn’t matter though, as he falls to the ground with a thud. Hazel comes up and punches him square in the face, leaving him unconscious.

“Thank you,” she says between heavy breaths, holding onto her fist in pain. You try not to think about how attractive her hands are covered in cuts and bruises.

“Don’t mention it,” you respond, wiping some blood that is dripping out of your nose. You look around, and can’t see any Huntington players left, instead your friends moving around the bodies on the ground, blood covering their clothes and faces.

“Did we do it?” you vaguely ask. Before anyone can answer you, you notice one last player coming up behind PJ who is on her knees on the ground.

“PJ, look out!” you all shout in unison as he moves towards her. Suddenly, he is knocked heavily onto the ground. Josie had come up behind him, swinging a baseball bat. For a few moments, nobody moves. Nobody speaks. You all look at each other, taking in each other’s appearances. You lock eyes with Hazel, breath catching in your throat. The entire crowd is completely still, mouths hanging open. A hissing sound begins, and the sprinklers begin spraying a liquid over the field.

The first person to speak is Tim.

“It’s pineapple juice! Turn it off!” he yells. With a squeak, they stop. Slowly, the crowd begins to clap, increasingly getting louder and louder. Soon, the cheering is deafening.

“Yes, this is the viking way!” Tim yells. You finally allow yourself to let out a breath. The group begins to celebrate, hugging each other. You give PJ a big hug, pulling away to notice Josie and Isabel kissing in the middle of everything. You look at each other and laugh in disbelief.

“Love that for them,” she says, and you nod. PJ moves away to hug somebody else, when you make eye contact with Hazel. You both glance over to Josie and Isabel, then back to each other. She smiled shyly, and your cheeks burn as you look down, unable to help from giggling to yourself. You walk over to Hazel, and you wrap your arms around each other. You let out a shaky breath, holding onto her tightly. When you pull away from each other, you’re not sure what to say.

“I-uh-“ you begin, then chuckle awkwardly.

“I meant it when I said we could kiss again,” she says, her hands in her pockets as she shuffles back and forth on her feet, looking up at you beneath her lashes. Your heart quite literally skips a beat.

In response, you move closer to her yet again, tilting her head up with your fingers on her chin.

“Is this going to ruin the friendship?” you ask quietly. Hazel barely gets her next words out before your lips meet.

“I don’t care.”

Your eyes flutter closed, exhaling through your nose as your lips move together in sync. This time, you know exactly how to kiss one another. You briefly wonder how many girls Hazel had kissed to be this good at it.

“Oh my god,” you murmur against her lips, giving her one last soft kiss.

“I know,” Hazel says, smiling in the way that she does that makes your insides twist in the best way possible.

“Um, so, I have a really important question,” you say cheekily, twirling a piece of Hazel’s hair in your finger.

“Yeah?” she asks, frowning.

“Why the fuck do you know how to build a bomb?” Hazel immediately laughs. As if right on cue, you hear a boom. You whip your head around, gasping to see the tree on fire.

“I still think we were a better distraction,” Hazel murmurs, not answering your question, before she leaves a soft kiss on your neck. You sigh, eyes fluttering at the feeling.

#bottoms movie #bottoms 2023 #hazel callahan #hazel callahan x reader #hazel callahan x you #hazel callahan smut #hazel callahan imagine #bottoms fanfic

[malfoyfarms]

She Wanted You

JJ Maybank x Routledge!Reader

Word Count:1.4k

Warnings:none

A/n: angst bc im boycotting watching season three LOL, not my gif

“What do you mean she left?” JJ questioned, dumbfounded. He didn’t realize it, but he was walking into a war zone. The Chateau no longer had the same feel. It was like someone sucked the air out, and pumped smog in. 

With tears in his eyes, John B pointed towards his sister’s room. Sarah and Pope were lingering in there, but JJ had no idea why. The room was oddly neat, incredibly out of character of the girl who resided there. Her closet was emptier than usual, the three picture frames that once had pictures of her with her family and friends were empty. What caught JJ’s eyes next, made his mouth go dry. His breath was no longer there. The navy sweatshirt he had given her years ago was folded, on the bed, next to the pillow he always claimed during their relationship. Atop the sweatshirt was a ring from a gumball machine, an orange and green friendship bracelet made of paracord, and a pile of notes written on scraps of random papers. Every other personal belonging was missing from its spot. 

JJ tore through the girl’s nightstand, and when he realized the box of her life savings was gone, he let out a string of colorful words and kicked the stand.

“Here, you should read this.” Sarah handed him a neatly written note. By the tear stains on Pope’s face, the somber tone from the kook, and JB’s raging anger, it was a farewell. 

He took a deep breath, and swiped the letter from Sarah. The familiar handwriting was already pulling at his heart.

J,

I’ve rewritten this letter four times already, and I still don’t know how to put my thoughts into actual words. Firstly, I love you. I love you until the waves stop coming in. I love you so much that I knew I needed to leave. I’ve known since you wandered home with John B in third grade, and gave me all the answers (even though they were wrong) to my math homework that if there was going to be another boy in my life, he was going to have to fight you for that spot. From 7 years old, I only ever wanted you. But over the last two years, I can see that I’m not the one for you. And that is why I’m leaving. One of the only things that got me through my day was seeing you smile, but I understand that there is someone else who causes those crinkles by your eyes.

I have to leave because it’s too painful. I need time to have all your kisses leave my body, I need to leave because I can’t smell the ocean, listen to Akon and Konvict, or even wash my fucking clothes without thinking of you. I see you in body language, in the waves, in every damn aspect of my life. Not only are we ingrained on this island, but you are ingrained in me. If I’m ever going to come home I need to remove every trace. 

I told you last week, I’d always be on your team, even from a distance. I need you to pursue Kiara because there is nothing more I want for you than happiness. Deep down, I know it will always be her. While that sentence feels like a shot, I’m coming to terms with it. 

Don’t try to come find me, either. I won’t be going to any of the places we’ve ever talked about, I do have my secrets still. Not Yucatan, not Tybee, and certainly not Jekyll. Take care of my brother.

All my love, 

Y/N

“When did you and Y/N break up?” Sarah asked. JJ couldn’t even think straight. Y/N and the boy broke up about a week ago, for that specific reason, JJ thought there was something there with Kiara. He didn’t think the girl would pick up her stuff and bolt. Leave her brother, her best friends, and the life she claimed to love. 

“I, uh, initiated it last week or so,” he stuttered, “it wasn’t definite or anything, but it was insinuated I guess. We had a conversation about it, but I don’t think I ever could have said it out loud.”

“Oh,” she thought. “You know she really loved you with every bone in her body.”

He sucked in a deep breath to try to keep his tears at bay. How could he walk out to the front room and face John B. He was the reason the youngest Routledge had left. With Big John gone, she was all he had left. Hell, with Luke gone, she was all JJ had too. In some form he robbed his friends of a family member. 

JJ laid down on the neatly made bed and latched onto the sweatshirt that smelled just like her. His memory flooded with images of Y/n in that sweatshirt. From it covering her bikini when they went night swimming, it being the one sweatshirt that was specifically for after she came home from school, the one thing that grounded her when she was having a rough day. JJ felt his chest start to tighten, and his hands were clammy and shaking. 

“I thought you said you’d never break her heart!” JB screamed. Impeccable timing. 

“John B don’t–” Sarah tried to interject.

“No Sarah, he promised. He promised me almost three years ago that if I gave him permission to date Y/n, he wouldn’t hurt her. He knew he’d be breaking more than just her heart. And now I can’t even help her pick up the pieces. I can’t fix my baby sister, the way she fixed each and every one of us!” 

“Bro, you think this is what I wanted? I had a conversation with her. Nothing was definitive. It’s not my fault she took her shit and ran!”

“When has Y/n ever not taken her feelings and ran? Name one time!”

JJ sat there in thought, and there had been one time she didn’t run, and he had promised that he wouldn’t tell. He was going to anyway.

“When you disappeared. I held her while she cried herself to sleep for nights on end. So don’t act like I never treated her right. You know I did.” JB ran his hands through his hair and left the room. 

“Until you decided you may have feelings for the girl who is like her big sister.” That stung. 

“What’s going on?” Kie asked.

“She’s gone.” John B said. “‘Cuz JJ’s in love with you.”

~~

JJ sat in the hammock, wearing the navy sweatshirt he hadn’t worn in years. It smelled just like her. He could even feel the marks of where she rolled the sleeves and dug her thumbs into the side. 

He barely remembered last week’s conversation about Kie, but never did he think that it would cause you to disappear. Y/n was so incredibly loyal. She wanted him. Every. Damn. Day. She wanted him when the clouds were out, and the usually blue sky was gray. She wanted him when he was bruised and beat up, she wanted him when he was crabby after a 14 hour shift, she wanted him at every hour of the day in any way she could have him. 

It was just a conversation, he thought. He never flat out said that he was leaving her for the tanned, wealthy kook. 

He felt so fucking stupid. He felt so much self-hatred. He remembered when they were 12 and 14, and Y/n wanted to walk to the gas station a few streets over, but John B wouldn’t go with her. He remembered what she usually bought. Peach iced tea, sour straws and a bag of munchie mix. Every single time. 

He remembered when the girl got drunk for the first time and dialed him to come get her. God, she was so inebriated. She clung to the boy, giggling profusely. That was the first night she ever told the boy she loved him. Y/n never knew it, but JJ kept that memory locked in his head. 

He pondered the time she was ready to give him her virginity. He remembered how nervous she was, but how much she trusted him. 

It had grown dark by the time he wandered back into the Chateau. He was surprised JB didn’t kick him out, he fully expected to be out on the streets by now. As he stumbled towards the bedrooms, he went past his own, and fully dove into the light purple sheets he had come to love. She’ll come back, he thought. She has to.

#jj x reader #jj outer banks #jj maybank #jj maybank imagine #Outer Banks #outer banks imagine #obx imagine #hms pogue

[bradshawssugarbaby]

Girl, You're My Angel - Bradley Bradshaw x Reader

summary: Bradley Bradshaw's a down on his luck first baseman in the MLB, struggling to find his stride in the game he loves so much. A wedding invite from his ex-wife is enough to convince him to go for a drink, trying to forget about everything going on. He wasn't banking on meeting you though.

pairing: baseball!Bradley Bradshaw x reader (nicknamed Angel)

warnings/content: baseball au, mentions of divorce, smoking, alcohol, reference to drunk driving, bar fight, mentions of blood, Bradley having a dirty mind.

word count: 3k.

taglist (also tagging those who were interested in Take One For The Team since it's a similar vibe and explains the lack of updates lol): @avengersfan25, @jessicab1991, @atarmychick007, @b-bradshaw, @nouis-bum, @mamachasesmayhem, @floydsmuse, @kmc1989, @dckweed, @katfanfic, @nerdgirljen, @whatislovevavy, @mrsevans90, @averyhotchner, @yuckosworld, @tgmreader, @allepaula, @lourd-ita, @mariaenchanted

The booming bass drum of a classic rock song thumped in your head as you gripped the cocktail glass in your hand. The liquid sloshed around in the glass as you danced, swaying to and fro with your best friends, trying your best to enjoy yourself on your girls’ night out. Your finals had just wrapped up, and you were this much closer to earning your masters, the only thing standing between you and getting that embossed sheet of paper, was your grades. To unwind after the cram sessions you’d mustered your way through for the past month, your friends dragged you out to some new amusement bar in the Gaslamp Quarter. 

Across the bar, on the other side of the room, stood Bradley Bradshaw, a once promising baseball star who now, had earned himself a reputation as the MLB’s resident asshole - unable to take criticism or a loss without lashing out at someone. His recent stunt involved hurling his baseball bat across the diamond when he struck out in practice, frustrated with his sudden lack of skill, a skill that once came so naturally to him when his mind wasn’t preoccupied. 

The invitation had come in the mail two days before the bat throwing incident. His ex-wife, the one who left him two and a half years ago, was remarrying the fucking prick she cheated on Bradley with. The invite had come completely out of the blue, and when Bradley opened it, he felt all of the air leave his lungs as his fingers traced over the gold embossed lettering, donning her name and the name of her new fiancé. He’d never admit it to anyone, but that single piece of cardstock had been enough to reduce him to tears, slumping down the kitchen wall as he hugged his knees to his chest, crying loud enough that it made him thankful he had no neighbours near by.

Bradley had pulled himself together, lit a cigarette from the pack he’d been nursing for the last few months, reserved only for social events and times of pure stress, and got in his vintage Ford Bronco, his first purchase when he signed his first contract. Taking a drag from the cigarette, his brown eyes scanned over San Diego’s downtown core as he cruised past a few of the typical nightlife spots - each one a little too public for what he wanted. All other options exhausted, he pulled up outside of a newer bar that had opened the previous week, neon lights advertising an arcade on one side and drinks on the other. 

He figured if nothing else, a couple of rounds of Pac-Man on an old video game after a handful of beers might do him good. He could leave the Bronco parked there and walk to the hotel around the corner, and forget about how his ex-wife’s wedding was coming up in six months, how she’d had the audacity to invite him to see her marrying the guy he’d walked in on her with.  

He sidled up to the bar, nodding his head to the bartender in thanks as he ordered himself a beer. Standing across from him was a group of women, not much younger than him, gossiping and giggling together. He sized the group up, thinking to himself that maybe a one-night deal was what he needed to take his mind off his ex. 

You were the tallest girl of the group, with bright eyes, and hair brushed back in a sleek, high ponytail, sporting a form-fitting cocktail dress that made Bradley’s heart race when he saw you. He pounded back the rest of his beer, trying to find his confidence in himself once again in the comfort of the drink. 

Bradley set his empty bottle down on the bar top before walking his way around the circular counter. He rested his elbow on the bar, leaning in with a broad smile as you looked in his direction. He offered a polite wave of his hand, chuckling awkwardly as he felt his confidence wavering as he spoke to you. 

“Hey, could I buy you a drink? He said simply, his Virginian accent dropping into a thicker drawl than usual.

“I’m good, thanks, still got one,” You held up your half-full glass and shook your head politely, not wanting to reject him too brutally. 

Bradley nodded his head once at you, his smile faltering for a second. He quickly regained himself, smiling once again politely before grabbing himself another beer and heading over to the arcade, resolving that a couple of old-school video games might make his night a little better. 

It wasn’t that he wasn’t used to rejection - he’d been turned down almost as often as he’d been accepted, but for some reason, your rejection stung just that little bit more. Maybe it was the wedding invitation still making things sour, or maybe it was the fact that the mere sight of a girl hadn’t been enough to make his heart accelerate like this in a long time. He shook his head once, trying to focus his train of thought once again on something, anything other than what was currently occupying it. 

Baseball? Too stressful, his game was starting to slip up on him. Buying a puppy? No, it’d just be one more thing he could let down. Hitting the gym? He already went 6 days a week - if he went any more frequently, he’d have to consider moving his bed in there. 

His mind raced as he pressed the buttons on the video game, moving the small yellow circle across the screen, collecting points between sips of beer. Behind him, he heard a couple of guys shouting at a tv screen, the sound of the latest sports highlights blaring out in the background. 

“This Bradshaw asshole needs to get his shit together. Twenty-nine and he plays about as well as my ten year old. Drop him down to the minors or get rid of the bastard. He shouldn’t be missing plays like this.” One of the voices shouted at the tv, his friends nodding their heads in silent agreement with his rant.

Bradley felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand at attention as the insults about his playing continued to spout from this guy’s mouth. He couldn’t have been much older than Bradley was, one of those armchair commentators who probably hadn’t swung a bat since Little League. As the criticism continued, each jab focused directly at Bradley’s game performance, missing one play that cost a game - one that he’d already been feeling pissed off about - it became harder to ignore. 

“I bet that hot little piece of ass wife of his left him because she knew he was a dogshit baseball player.” 

Bradley spun around on his heels so fast that he swore the room was spinning. He turned to face the group, crowded in a corner in front of the tv, faces all glued to the female commentator. Bradley could practically hear the derogatory thoughts they were having about her and it only fuelled his anger more. 

“Hey, man, if you’ve got an issue with how I play the game, I’d like to see you get off your ass and go play nine innings against Boston. Keep my ex-wife’s name out of your mouth.” Bradley scoffed, narrowing his dark brown eyes at the trio. 

“You got a problem, jackass?” The other man growled, raising an eyebrow at Bradley as he slammed his drink down on the table. “She probably left you for that rookie because even she knew you weren’t good for anything.”

“That so? Your wife would probably like to go a couple rounds with me though.” Bradley retorted, a devilish smirk forming on his face as he folded his muscular arms across his chest. 

Before Bradley had time to blink, the man drew back his arm and landed a hard punch to Bradley’s jaw. Bradley quickly delivered a stronger hit to the man’s face, watching him stumble backwards for a second. Bradley turned around and walked outside, getting ready to light another cigarette as he ran his hand over his jaw, assessing if he had any damage to worry about. 

The man returned, practically running outside after Bradley. More heated words were exchanged, insults flying between them both before the man delivered another hit, this time to Bradley’s nose. He shook his hand off and headed off down the street with his friends, disappearing off to the next bar. Bradley held his nose, blood dripping down from his nostrils and onto his hand. 

You and your friends had heard the commotion when it unfolded inside, and decided to head out, having enough excitement for one night. As you stepped out, you saw the man who’d hit on you earlier, this time with his nose bleeding onto the pavement under him. You ran over to him, raising an eyebrow.

“What did you do, hit on a girl who had a boyfriend?” You asked playfully as you rooted through your purse for something to help clean his nose.

“Called a guy out for saying my ex-wife was a “hot piece of ass”, actually,” Bradley nodded once, gratefully taking the tissues from you and using them to clean his nose. 

“Stick your hand out for a sec,” you instructed, squirting a dollop of scented hand sanitizer into his large palm before raising an eyebrow at him, “You don’t have anything I could catch from helping you without gloves?”

“What the hell is that suppose to mean?” Bradley scoffed, trying to laugh but wincing instead, “And why the fuck does my hand smell like a flower?”

“Lavender hand sanitizer. It’s not as good as washing your hands, but it’ll do while we’re outside. And I’m going to hold the tissues in place while you rub it into your hands, but I don’t want to catch something. I’m just fresh out of latex gloves.”

“Good thing. I’m allergic,” he laughed, shrugging his shoulders as he tried to brave through the pain, “I’m clean. You’re fine. I get drug tested and physicals through work constantly.” 

“What kind of a job provides those? Military?” 

“Professional athlete.” He nodded as you pinched the tissues to his nose, applying pressure to help with the bleeding. “Fuck, that hurts.”

“Your nose is broken, it’s suppose to hurt.”

“What are you, a doctor?”

“No, just wrote my finals for a masters in nursing.”

“Close enough,” Bradley nodded slightly, cringing as you continued to apply pressure to his nose.

You rooted through your purse, laughing softly as you pulled a tampon out of your bag. Bradley raised an eyebrow at you, not quite registering what the item was until you pulled the plastic wrapping off of it, stuffing the garbage back into your purse.

“What the fuck do you plan on doing with that?”

“I need to stick it up your nose on the left side. It’s bleeding more than I’d like to see, and a broken nose should probably be set in a medical setting. This way, you won’t bleed all over my car.”

“Your car? You’ve been drinking.”

“Half a vodka-cran over the span of three hours? I think I’m probably not gonna blow over the limit.”

“You are not sticking that up my nose,” he replied stubbornly, arms folding over his chest like a petulant child. 

“Look at your shirt,” you laughed, gesturing to the white floral print button down he was wearing, its collar now tinged with red and pink splotches. 

“Fine,” he said with a reluctant sigh, “but if anyone finds out about this, I’m denying it.”

“Your secret’s safe with me,” you nodded as you offered him the plastic applicator. 

Bradley rolled his eyes and reluctantly pressed the bottom of the applicator, pushing the tampon into the edge of his nose. He looked at you with another dramatic eyeroll and shook his head before walking down the street to a garbage can. He discarded the applicator before turning to face you, sighing. 

“I can take myself to a hospital, you know.”

“I’m already here, I may as well come with you. Besides, I feel kinda bad about turning you down.”

“Oh, so you’re taking care of me out of pity?” He teased, raising an eyebrow.

“Maybe. Even more so with a tampon hanging out of your nose.”

“It’s quite the fashion statement, isn’t it?” He laughed softly, unbuttoning his dress shirt. He shrugged the shirt off his shoulders, revealing a clean white t-shirt. 

You unlocked your car, the familiar beep as the doors unlocked causing Bradley to stifle a laugh.

“What is that?!” 

“My car,” you responded matter-of-factly, “What does it look like?”

“One of those cars for a Barbie doll that my goddaughter plays with,” he said as he flourished his hand, gesturing to your pink steering wheel cover and coordinating seat cover.

“Listen, I like pink. Now are you getting in, or do I have to make you?”

Bradley’s eyes widened for a moment, your playful threat of making him get into the car sending his mind into a frenzy again. He eyed you up and down again, and found himself shaking his head as he wondered what colour underwear you had on under your dress. He bet it was probably a coordinating pink set - the kind that Victoria’s Secret mannequins would model in the store window, with delicate little bows or lace or something adorning them. 

Focus, Bradley. She doesn’t want to sleep with you. Stop thinking about her.

He sat down in the passenger’s seat, watching as you hopped into the driver’s side. As you pulled away from the curb, he raised an eyebrow at your choice in music as Taylor Swift started blaring from the speaker.

“You can change it if you want to,” you nodded. “You can put on whatever.”

“No, no, It’s fine. I actually like this song.”

“You said you’re a professional athlete? What sport do you play?”

“Baseball,” he said, slowly nodding his head, “my headshot’s on a flag outside of Petco Park.”

“I thought I recognized you, you’re that player everyone always talks about, right?”

“Unfortunately. It’s rarely good things.”

“How come?”

Bradley sighed, raising an eyebrow, “You know they talk about me but not why?”

“I don’t follow baseball, I've actually never even seen a game, live or on tv. I just know my friend does and she told me everyone talks about you. Bradshaw, right? Number 10?”

“Yeah, that’s me. Bradley Bradshaw. First baseman, used to have a promising career, then, you know, wife cheats on me with a rookie from a rival team, catch her in a hotel room that I paid for with him, and then, despite me stupidly telling her I forgave her and you know what, I was pissed, but I loved her anyway and I blamed myself for her cheating, she served me divorce papers. Said I was incapable of loving anything but baseball. Says the woman who refused to do anything with me when I tried to be loving and affectionate. My friends swear she only married me for the status and the paycheck. Her new fiancé just signed a multi-million dollar contract that’s being talked about as one of the highest in the league, so it sort of checks out.” 

“Jeez,” you whistled, shaking your head, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. It was two and half years ago. I just, I haven’t found my stride again yet, I guess.” 

“Is that why you got defensive about her?”

“They said she left me for this other guy because she knew I was a dogshit ball player. I mean, it’s probably not far off. But, I got an invite for her wedding in the mail today, and I was already on edge, so I sort of…snapped.”

“She invited you?!” 

“Yeah, like that, huh? She probably thought I have someone new I’m seeing and that we could still be friends or some shit.”

“So you need a date?”

“I’m not going,” he said firmly, shaking his head. “I’m not going.”

“Why not? Free drinks for a night, you can wish her well while secretly hoping her husband’s ball career washes out on him in a year or two.”

Bradley chuckled, shrugging his shoulders as he gestured his hand towards you, “I like your thinking actually, but I’m not going alone.”

“I’ll go with you,” you offered, shrugging your shoulders, “When is it?”

“In six months, you don’t need to come with me though. I’ll send her some cheap gift and call it a day.”

“No,” you insisted as you pulled into a parking space at the hospital’s urgent care clinic, “I’ll come with you. I love a good revenge story. Besides, it could be fun. I’ve never partied with a bunch of baseball players before.”

“You’re…you’re something else, you know that?”

“You mean, you don’t have dozens of women offering you a tampon to stop your nosebleed, driving you to the hospital and then offering to accompany you to your ex-wife’s wedding date?” you challenged.

“Can’t say that I do, no.”

“Well, I’m honoured to be your first.” 

Bradley couldn’t help his ear to ear grin as he followed you into the hospital. Despite his bloodied, battered nose, which was hurting more than he cared to let on, and his fledging career, falling apart around him as he stood there, he felt genuinely excited. Excited to get to know you better. Excited to see where things went with you. He felt a promising sense in your words - like maybe, just maybe, he might be able to be done with one-night-stands and empty beds in the morning. He felt giddy, like a teenager going on a first date with his high school crush. He wasn’t sure if it was the pain from his nose or the alcohol talking, but he was almost convinced you were a guardian angel of sorts. Refusing to believe that someone like you could be anything but. 

First things first though, he needed to bring you to a baseball game. 

#bradley bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw au #bradley bradshaw x y/n #bradley bradshaw x you #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw au #bradley rooster bradshaw x you #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw x y/n #rooster bradshaw #rooster bradshaw au #rooster bradshaw x you #rooster bradshaw x reader #rooster bradshaw x y/n #top gun maverick au fic #baseball au

[starstruckmiraclekitty]

Hi dear can I request Ghost x Reader where Ghost is absolutely down for her and they are secretly in love with each other and are close to confessing, but on a mission y/n and another soldier are commanded to clear the buildings while the others stay put, but it’s a trap and they blow the building up and it collapses trapping reader from the ribs down, no one can get in and no one out and she knows it’s the end for her and ghost looses his shit. Thank you in advance ❤️

Thank you for this!!! The angsttttt I'm here for it😭😭 hopefully I did what you were looking for justice🙃❤️

You Can't Leave Me

Warnings: angst, mentions of death, crying, injury, swearing

The 141 was tasked with clearing out two buildings near Al Mazra to try and find their HVT. One of the members of AQ had taken the reigns since the death of Hassan, and you and the team needed to find him and take him out.

The boys were to secure building A, the larger building, while you and a stand-in member cleared building B, the smaller one.

Everything seemed to have gone according to plan, the team had found the HVT and took him out, and was able to gather some valuable intel along the way. Price, Gaz, Johnny and Ghost were all heading toward the exfil point, waiting for you and your partner to meet them. The team had gotten word that an influx of AQ soldiers were on their way to your location, so you were trying to get out as fast as you could.

The four of them had made it to the exfil point, when a loud explosion sounded from behind them.

"The hell was that?" Soap asked, whipping his head to the source.

"Oh my God, that's Y/N's building." Gaz said, a solemn expression taking over his face. "Was it..was it a trap?"

"No, no, no." Ghost turned on his comms. "Y/N, come in."

No response came from you, and Simon was starting to panic. This could not be happening. Not to you. "Y/N, are you there?"

Silence filled the other end of the comm, and Ghost felt his breathing quicken. The two of you were unbelievably close. Ever since you'd started in the 141, he'd taken you under his wing. As time progressed, the two of you developed a bond like no other. Simon let you in, in ways he'd never let anyone in before. You were his best friend, and he was yours. Both of you harbored deep, unspoken feelings for one another, feelings that were known to everyone else but the two of you.

"Y/N, ANSWER ME!" Ghost practically screamed into his comms. He broke out in a cold sweat, and his throat was starting to run dry.

"S-Simon. I'm here." You croaked out. The building had collapsed on you and your partner. Your partner was killed instantly by the blast, while a piece of concrete had landed in just the right angle for you to be trapped from the waist down.

"Where are you? I'll come get you. Tell me where you are."

"Simon, you can't get in here, and there's no way for me to get out. I'm trapped. It's..it's okay." You tried pulling yourself up again, to no avail. You were trapped with no way out. "It's okay."

"No its not fucking okay, Y/N tell me where you are, NOW." Simon started to make his way toward the rubble, only to be pushed back by Price.

"Simon, we can't. There's no way we can get to her. The AQ fighters will be here any minute in full force. I'm sorry. I wish there was something we could do. If it were possible, you know I would do what I could. " Price put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a sorrowful look. Price was devastated himself. He pictured you as a daughter, but now was not the time to mourn. He had to get his team to safety.

"The fuck we can't! There's 4 of us, we can move the rubble, she just needs to tell us where she is!" Ghost shoved Price's arm off him. "I won't take that as an answer, John. We can not just leave her to die!"

In all the years of them working together, Simon had never talked back to Price, not once. Price knew better than to say anything, though. He knew this was tearing his lieutenant apart.

"Y/N, please. Please tell me where you are. I can't lose you. I'm begging you." Simon cried into the comms.

"I'm so sorry, Simon." You choked out a sob, not sure what to say to him. You didn't want to leave him. You didn't want to die. You could feel yourself growing weaker, as you started to inhale more and more dust from the debris. You wanted nothing more than for Simon to come and save you, but that was selfish. You couldn't bear the thought of him getting killed trying to save you. But God, what you wouldn't give to be in his arms, just one last time. "I am so thankful I had you in my life. I don't regret a second of it."

"Not like this, please. Sweetheart, there was so much I wanted to tell you." Simon pleaded. "Please don't do this to me."

"Tell me now, Si. I'm here."

Simon hesitated before speaking. Part of him didn't want you to tell you right now. He wanted to hold on to hope that you'd make it out of this, that he could tell you in person. But that small part of him that knew this was likely the last time he'd ever get to tell you this, pushed him to tell you how he felt, finally.

"I was going to tell you that I love you, dammit. You're the best fucking part of my day, and that smile of yours, that goddamned smile is the only thing that keeps me going. I was going to ask you on a date when we got back. God, I want to make you mine so bad, YN." Simon's tears were flowing down his face as he struggled to get the words out. "You're my everything, kid."

Price and the others had turned their comms off and kept some distance from Simon to respect his and yours privacy. Johnny looked to his close friend, and his heart broke into a million pieces. He was watching Simon's whole being shatter before his eyes, and there was nothing he could do to help him. There was nothing he could do to save you, either. He'd never felt so helpless.

"Oh, Simon." You sobbed. "I love you too. I always have. I wish we'd had more time. I would have loved if you had been yours. I would've shown you the love you so deserve."

"So then tell me where you are, baby girl, please. We can have that. I can give you that. I can be whatever you want me to be, just let me come get you."

"Please, Si. There's no use. They will be here any minute. I won't let you risk your life for nothing."

"You're not NOTHING, Y/N." Simon shouted, his voice breaking. "I have to save you. I couldn't save them, but I can save you, please let me."

"I love you so much Simon Riley. I- I..." Your voice faded on the comms as your end of the line started to crackle.

"Y/N? Y/N!" Simon was screaming your name, to no avail. "No, no, no. No, this isn't happening. This isn't real."

He threw his gun to the ground, and started to charge at the collapsed building before Price and Johnny pulled him back.

"Simon, Simon, we can't. I'm so sorry." Price said as he stepped in front of the lieutenant.

"No, I can't leave her. I can't leave her!" He sobbed, pushing price away from him with the full force of his body.

Gaz and Johnny went to tackle Simon before he could get any further, and brought the masked man to his knees.

"Simon, we've got to go. I'm so sorry, mate." Johnny tried to meet his friend's eyes, but Simon was beyond hysterical.

"God DAMMIT, Y/N! I'm sorry, I failed you. I'm so sorry, sweetheart." Simon threw his head into his hands and sobbed, not caring who saw him. This couldn't be the end for you. He was finally ready to open himself up to you, finally ready to be with you. It was like the world was playing a cruel joke on him. It couldn't end like this….could it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

#cod imagine #simon riley imagine #mw2 imagine #ghost x reader #ghost mw2 #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley #ghost angst #simon riley angst #mw2 x reader #simon ghost riley #ghost imagine #ghost x you

[joeys-babe]

Joey B Imagines: Birthday Boy

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Summary: December 10th, Joe’s 27th birthday spent with you and your twin boys.

Warnings: Fluff, *he's not injured!!*

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

Imagine universe: Into The Mystic

————————————————————————-

December 10th, 2023

Joe had awoken in bed by himself this morning to his surprise. He had expected you, his wife, to be waking him with smooches all over his face but your side of the bed was empty.

He rolled over to grab his phone off his nightstand when the setup sitting on it made him smile. Every year since you and Joe got together in high school when you guys were 16 and 17, on Joe’s birthday you'd get him white roses. The number of them would be the age he was turning that day. There they were, 27 white roses in a vase.

Realizing there was a card and a gift bag propped up next to it, Joe leaned up in bed and picked up the card first.

Happy Birthday, Joey!

Gosh, how are you 27?! You're getting old babe. JKJK. I just wanted to tell you that I’m so happy to share another birthday with you, this is the 11th one that we've celebrated together and I hope I've made every year better than the last. 26 was such a year for you, and I'm proud to say I was by your side for all of it. Cheers to another year of getting to show you how much I love you. You're my husband, my rock, my happiness, my high school sweetheart, and most importantly my best friend. I love you more than words can explain, Joey Shiesty.

To my nerdy, quirky, antisocial, video game, Kid Cudi-obsessed boy, Happy 27th birthday.

Love, your y/n.

Joe didn't realize tears were streaming down his cheeks till he put the card down and saw a wet spot on the blanket on his lap. He quickly composed himself and grabbed the gift bag.

Pulling the contents out of the bag, he felt his eyes well up again when he realized it was a photo album.

It was white leather and on the front in gold font, it simply read “Us.”

Joe flipped to the first page and it had a song lyric quoted.

“When they wanna see how true love should be, they'll just look at us.”

Flipping the page again, it was a collage of pictures of you and him as high school lovebirds. A picture of him picking you up after a win while you were in your cheer uniform, one of you two sitting next to each other at lunch just smiling from ear to ear, you and him sitting in the back of one of his friend's truck while at a drive-in movie, a pic of you two at senior prom, and finally one of you guys graduating.

Joe flipped the page and wasn't at all surprised to see it was the Ohio State era of his life. Since Joe was a year older than you, you were stuck in Athens still when Joe was a freshman at OSU. Long distance sucked, but you guys made it work, and multiple pictures were showcasing that. You took screenshots of you and Joe's face timing that he had never seen before. There was a lovesick look in his eye that made Joe giggle knowing he's still just as infatuated with you. His favorite picture was the one of him lying on top of you in his dorm bed, you were running your fingers through his mullet as you cuddled him.

The LSU page made Joe’s heart warm, so many pictures of you standing to the side and smiling at him just so proud of everything he had accomplished during his time there. There was one slightly spicy photo that made Joe do a double take. That was the first photo you had ever sent him with the intention of turning him on. While Joe was out doing something with the team after winning the national championship you put nothing on but his letterman jacket and the “Big Dick Joe” that he had.

The next few pages only made Joe smile get bigger.

In order it was him getting drafted, the 2022 AFC Championship win + engagement, the wedding, finding out I was pregnant, the gender reveal, the boy's arrival, and everything in between.

When the last few pages were empty for more memories Joe shut the book and put it off to the side. He again had to compose himself and wipe his eyes after the emotional walk through memory lane, you guys had been through so much together and Joe couldn't a picture his life without you.

Joe was about to text you but as soon as he went to grab his phone you were walking into the bedroom. Truthfully you had been downstairs listening to him secretly through the baby monitor you had put up in the bedroom. You had heard him wrestle around in the sheets before sniffles were heard. After it went quiet for a bit you went upstairs and watched him through the cracked bedroom door as he wiped his eyes.

You walked towards the bed with a stack of pumpkin-flavored pancakes topped with candles singing Happy Birthday as Joe wore a huge grin.

After you were finished singing, Joe blew out the candles and you placed the plate on his lap.

“G’morning, Joey. Happy Birthday, my love. - you

He pulled you into a hug and squeezed you so tight.

“I love you so much, y/n.” - Joe

You rubbed his back and kissed him after you pulled away, his arms still around your waist.

“What did you wish for when you blew out your candles?” - you

“Can't tell you, you know it wouldn't come true if I did.” - Joe

“You're no fun.” - you

“I'm just kidding, baby. I actually didn't make a wish.” - joe

“What why? Did I not give you enough time to? I'm sor-” - you

“No. You gave me plenty of time. I just don't have anything to wish for. I have everything I could ever want or need so there's no need for me to wish for something. I have a beautiful amazing wife, perfect twin boys, a good career…” - Joe

You stared at him dumbfounded, wondering how you were ever able to bag this sweet man.

“You’re gonna make me cry.” - you sniffled

“C’mere.” - Joe opened his arms to you

Immediately in his embrace, Joe held the back of your head and kissed your temple.

“I've already cried twice.” - Joe giggled

“Awe Joey. Okay enough sappy stuff, you eat your birthday breakfast while I go clean the kitchen up.” - you pulled away from him and headed for the door when he stopped you

“Wait don't go! I'll help you clean later, can you stay with me right now?” - Joe

You smiled sweetly at him before waking back over to the bed and getting under the covers with him.

Joe turned on Spongebob and ate his pancakes, a few minutes in you heard little feet in the hallway before knocks on the door could be heard.

“Mommy? Daddy?” - Tyson

“You can come in, Ty!” - Joe

The twins happily opened the door and toddled over to the bed. You lifted them onto the bed and they sat with their backs against the footboard.

Tyson giggled as he jokingly got his hand under the covers and tickled Joe’s foot. Joe played along with it for a little bit, loving the sound of his son’s laugh before he started fighting back.

“Do you boys remember what today is?” - you

“Uhm… no momma.” - Miles

“It's someone's birthday!” - you

Tyson and Miles looked at each other for a second before they gasped at the same time and yelled out the answer in unison.

“Daddy’s!” - The twins yelled

“Mhm! Remember what you guys made yesterday?” - you

The boys nodded and you instructed them to go retrieve what they made from their room.

Joe gave you a skeptical raised eyebrow look, but you just leaned in and kissed him while you still had the chance.

It wasn't long till you could hear those little feet again and Tyson and Miles were running back into the bedroom. They handed Joe a few pieces of paper after he put his empty plate on his nightstand.

Tyson drew a picture of him, his daddy, and his uncles passing football at the practice fields.

Miles drew a picture of him and Joe playing with Hot Wheels tracks.

The drawings had Joe feeling a different form of bliss, his heart warmed to an insane level as he looked at the little details in his boys’ drawings.

“I love them, boys. Thank you.” - Joe croaked

“You welcome!” - Tyson beamed

“Dada? You sad?” - Miles

“No, Daddy’s really happy.” - Joe

“But you cryin'…” - Miles

“He’s crying happy tears buddy, really happy tears.” - Joe

“Oh… okay!” - Miles

“You guys should go play. Mommy and Daddy are gonna clean up before Gramps and Grammy come.” - you

When the boys left the room you turned to Joe who was still crying. You softly kissed his cheek and wiped his tears off of his cheeks.

“You okay, baby?” - you

“Never been better. This is the best feeling.” - Joe

“Good. They worked hard on those. Come follow me downstairs. I have something cool to show you.” - you

“You gonna give me my 27 birthday spankings? Or is that later?” - joe

You laughed as you pulled him out of bed and shoved him into the closet, asking without words for him to put clothes on since he was only in boxers.

He returned in sweatpants and a T-shirt and followed you downstairs.

“Is the cool thing you have to show me a sink full of dishes? Or do I have to unload the dishwasher?” - Joe

“You’re exempt from those chores today since you are the birthday boy. But no, I’m giving you one of your gifts now.” - you

Joe smiled and I told him to close his eyes as we started walking into the kitchen. He did as you said and you took his hands in yours to guide him to where the setup on the counter was. You smiled at the secret camera you had recording and dropped Joe’s hands.

Telling him to open his eyes, Joe looked around rather confused but when he looked down at the counter his eyes went as wide as saucers.

There was a positive Clearblue test next to the same onesie you showed Joe when you found out you were pregnant with the twins.

You watched Joe’s eyes start to water as his chin started quivering, causing your own eyes to get misty as you smiled at him.

“You’re pregnant?” - Joe grinned

“Mhm.” - you smiled as tears dripped down your face

Immediately his arms were around you, lifting you and spinning you around as he cried into your neck.

“We’re having another baby!” - Joe cried

When he put you down, Joe picked up the pregnancy test with shaky hands and fell against the counter with his head buried in his arms. He was so overcome with emotion.

“Are you happy?” - you rubbed his back

Joe stood up abruptly and nodded vigorously.

“I've never been so happy. What if we have a girl, y/n? I could be a girl dad.” - Joe cried again

“Oh baby.” - you pulled him into your arms

Joe hugged you so tight but was now trying not to put pressure on your stomach now that he was aware his baby was in there.

“I love you so much, y/n. You and our family are the best things to have ever happened to me. I can't believe we're having another baby.” - Joe

“I love you and our babies so much. I can't believe it either, I'm so excited.” - you

“How long have you known? Well about the baby?” - Joe

“Not too long, found out a couple of days ago and thought I'd wait till today.” - you

Joe nodded and leaned down to be level with your stomach. It hasn't gotten bigger yet but Joe didn't care, his baby was still in there.

“Hey, baby. It's your daddy. Me and your momma already love you so much. We can't wait to meet you.” - Joe

“I have an ultrasound next week. Think you can go?” - you

“For sure. I'll make it happen.” - Joe

The rest of the day Joe couldn't keep his hands off of you, always making sure you weren't farther than arm's length away from him.

Robin asked what was up later at dinner when you rejected your usual favorite wine that she and Jimmy had brought.

You and Joe were ecstatic to tell his parents about Baby Burrow #3 coming next fall and they were just as happy finding out about their next grandkid.

That night after dinner, dessert (pumpkin pie of course), and putting the boys to sleep, Joe and I were lying in bed talking about everything baby.

“y/n, you know, I've only been 27 for a day but I feel like it's going to be the best year yet.” - Joe

“You think so?” - you

“I know so because I’m gonna spend it with you, our boys, and baby Burrow.” - Joe

You had a strange feeling that Joe was right, but also an overwhelming feeling of love washed over you. How'd you get so lucky with Joe?

————————————————————————-

Authors note: happy bday Joey B!

there was a birthday imagine request in my messages so here you go!

hope you enjoyed! 💕

#joe burrow #bengals #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow x reader #joey b #cincinnati bengals #joe burrow fan fic

[pomegranate-pen]

Why you shouldn't fall for blondes

Yandere! Aqua Hoshino x Reader

summary:

Perhaps, becoming the official composer for B-Komachi was a mistake.

Sure, the pay was great, and yes, you did get a good sum of followers and subscribers all because of your guest features on the official channel. But somehow, even if you were still much less popular than the girls in front, you’ve been starting to feel…watched.

---- alt title: in which reader, a composer for B-Komachi finds themself being stalked, and needing to take some security measures for safety. unfortunately for them, the situation worsens.

here's the ao3 version if you're more comfortable reading there!

warnings: the usual yandere stuff, such as stalking, kidnapping, manipulation, gaslighting and etc, though, no murder or extreme noncon happens ( though there's still noncon kissing), there are slight mentions of nsfw, but they are in the context of jokes! reader is gender-neutral and uses they/them pronouns.

words: ...30k...lord have mercy...

Perhaps, becoming the official composer for B-Komachi was a mistake.

Sure, the pay was great, and yes, you did get a good sum of followers and subscribers all because of your guest features on the official channel. But somehow, even if you were still much less popular than the girls in front, you’ve been starting to feel…watched.

It was first very subtle, and you only perceived it as perhaps getting a few more glances from strangers due to your face looking familiar. Someone they perhaps saw on their recommendation, or heard of by name or photo. But ever since your job offers outside of Strawberry Productions increased, and your contributions to different art communities have become more acknowledged, you’ve gotten more colleagues and friends around you, and with that, you’ve also felt more stalked than ever.

Still, you naively brushed it off. Or perhaps, you intentionally wanted to constantly ignore it. you've gotten so far, and you’re becoming more popular than you could’ve ever wished for. It was a dream come true, a dream any artist such as yourself would want to achieve. Why stop now just for this small feeling?

Yet, as time passed, and the feeling increased, you couldn’t help but start to feel paranoid. Even now, in the midst of your writings and scribbles in the office, as the B-Komachi team chatted, You heard Kana speak about being forced to take different routes home, because she too, was noticing the pair of eyes behind her back. it was even more concerning when Memcho agreed with her, speaking about how in recent weeks she’s seen articles about different idols finding stalkers around the comforts of their homes.

Shit. That is not good to hear. You take a deep breath, pencil now dropped to the table as you quickly grab your water bottle in stress.

Ruby, ever curious, was first to notice your strange behavior for the day. “You okay there Y/n?”

You turn around to face the group, though refreshed, the water does not help to quell your fears. You cleared your throat, a bit of exhaustion seeping into you. “I’m fine.” Was all you could huff.

“You don’t look fine.” Memcho gave you a concerned look.

Soon enough, Arima’s attention seemed to be caught as well, though her tone was more scolding rather than concerned, you knew her intentions were in the right place. “If you have something on your mind, it’s best to tell your coworkers rather than stay silent”. She raised a brow. “Is it about our vocals in the new song?”

Not wanting to see another feud of Arima’s self-deprecating humor and Ruby’s repeated determination to sing the notes perfectly, you quickly answered the question. “No No- it’s not that at all-“In a hurried moment, you felt the hairs on your skin stand still as you felt the same piercing gaze once more. You glance behind you in a fit of panic, yet you only find Miss Saitou and Aqua busy with their work, and that feeling of edge left as soon s it came, leaving you confused and a bit horrified. Saitou looked at you with concern.

“…are you truly fine, L/n?” she questioned, and you were left speechless as now everyone in the room was staring at you like you were going insane.

“I-..I uh…” Ah fuck. Perhaps, it wouldn’t hurt to tell them. After all, usually when one doesn’t tell others about such strange situations, they end up dead in an alleyway- or at least- that’s what all the crime movies have told you.” This might be me being overwhelmed by how popular B-Komachi is getting..but, ..I think I have a stalker.”

You didn’t really want to look at them, you were completely sure they were smiling and holding back cackles of laughter. Is a mere composer for the band getting stalked rather than the team itself? It’s more than just funny, it’s ridiculous.

Silence takes over the room, and for 15 solid seconds, you keep thinking perhaps they’re holding back their giggles. Yet nothing comes out, and you finally look up to them, only to see horrified faces. Surprisingly enough, Ruby’s expression was the most haunting of all. it’s as if she saw a murder happen right in front of her. Aqua was the first to cut through the silence, and though his expression looked solemn, he did seem quite conflicted. Yet..there’s something different about his expression. Something you couldn’t quite place. It’s as if he was masking something else. You truly weren't certain about what exactly he was masking. Perhaps it was the true horror he felt? After all, Aqua is an actor, he’s most likely using these skills to calm everyone down and not add more fuel to the fire. He’s always been caring in that sense. “Are you certain it’s a stalker, Y/n?”

“I mean…not really.” You answer truthfully. The more you think about it, the more uncomfortable you feel. There was this sort of tension your mind was warning you about, a sort of alarm, that the gaze you so fear is still right around the corner. Curse these anxieties, you thought. You try to shake off those thoughts and continue with your explanation. “ It’s kinda just like what Kana said, a pair of eyes everywhere- but lately, it’s been getting more frequent.”

You take another glance at Ruby, and you feel guilt course through you.“I-I’m sure it’s nothing though! I’m probably just being paranoid and stupid- sorry to worry you guys-“ her eyes were so sorrowful, it’s as if she’s seen a ghost. She looks at you as if you just spoken about a traumatizing experience with perfect nonchalance. And you wonder, maybe you did, and your fear has now increased tenfold.

“Paranoia or not, with the level of fame B-Komachi is acquiring these days, it wouldn’t hurt to enhance more security in your lives.” Saitou soon looked back at her computer, the sounds of her quick typing apparent. “ I can add more security to the building here since we now have the funds available for it. you can also ask us to install some security devices in your houses if you two feel that worried about it.”

“huh? I’m not that concerned.” Kana shrugged, though her face was a little bit more on edge than before. “ I just said it as a casual comment. I-I expected something like this anyway-I can find my way out of a situation like this easily.” Though her show of confidence was admirable, you could notice in her slight shifts in posture and twitches in her eye that she wasn’t feeling that safe now either. Now deepening more of your guilt as you silently berate yourself for even bringing the topic up.

To your relief and slight concern, Ruby finally spoke. “ Still, we should be really careful from now on, I don’t want any of us to get hurt.” Something was certainly off with her, too. But you couldn’t pinpoint what exactly. The twins have always been a mystery to you. though Ruby is better to understand, there are certain tones she has that make her words feel a bit like a lie or hide a deeper agenda. And for Aqua, it was always evident that he lies to hide certain emotions, or rather, lies to fabricate some emotions he shows to the public. Nevertheless, though your observation skills have always been on the stellar side, you still can’t fully understand who they are. And right now, with the cautious and out-of-character seriousness that Ruby’s tone has, you can guess that there’s a deeper reason for her tense nature. Still, that doesn’t explain the eerie feeling you get from Aqua. The nonchalance he has isn’t out of his personality, yet it plants a seed of doubt in your mind. “We should leave the place in groups from now on. “

“I agree.” Aqua comments. “We should be in groups divided by two, each person should walk with someone who's closer to their neighborhood.”

----

To your constant unfortunate luck, your home is much farther than everyone else's. With that, Ruby and Saitou paired up together, Since they live together, of course. Arima and Memcho were luckily near each other, and all that was left were you and Aqua. Though. Aqua could’ve easily just paired up with Ms.Saitou and Ruby, everyone thought it was ideal if you had a pair as well. after all, you are the one who raised the stalker concerns, as much as that guilts you now.

“Something on your mind, Y/n?”

In the now dark quiet streets of the once busy city, you find yourself ashamed and embarrassed for staying up all night again and working on the new song, completely forgetting about the blonde actor that was patiently waiting for you. it was around one a.m. when you finally checked the time and remembered the companion just a few seats away from you. After some apologizing, you began your walk to the now-empty streets. Hey, at least we avoided the crowd traffic’ Aqua commented, though it wasn’t really helpful in soothing your embarrassment. "It’s nothing. I just feel bad about bumming out your sister. Sorry about that.”

Aqua merely hummed, the casual sour look still on his face." don't blame yourself. It’s not your comment that got her frightened per se. we…didn’t have a good experience when the first B-Komachi fell from grace.”

Right, Ai Hoshino’s murder. The infamous idol that Ruby and Aqua always seemed so fond of seeing as a role model, they must’ve been scarred from her death as well, you figured. You give Aqua a sympathetic look. “ I can only imagine how hard it was for everyone in Strawberry Productions. He was silent for a moment, and the only noise in the dark streets was from the few little cars that were passing by. You wonder if you’ve crossed the line somewhere- perhaps your choice of words has caused a misunderstanding- but before you can clarify anything he finally speaks.

“Yeah…she was the star that always lit up the room. without her, everything started feeling….” The space between all his words, the hesitancy that was in his posture and tone, it was something you’d never seen from Aqua. an enigma of emotion from an emotionless boy.”… dim.”

“I see…” was all you could reply with. A few moments pass by, and by the unmoving stare Aqua has on the ground, you knew he was quite gloomy now. “Well- if it makes you feel any better…I think Ruby has that certain light Ai had.”

Aqua gives a small scoff. “She’s more like a fire hazard than a star.” He mumbles.

“And you say that because?”

“She gets too excited. I don’t understand why she wants to be an idol given our experience with it.” 

oh, so everyone else wasn’t exaggerating. He is quite a bit protective of her. Even so, you wouldn’t go as far as calling him a siscon…although, Kana did mention that his protective behavior has died down a bit ever since your arrival. A connection that you were completely confused about, since there could be no way that you have affected their relationship in such a way when you were just a mere stranger to them. You go to a completely different school and only briefly known Arima as an old classmate. That was the only connection you had to B-Komachi until Saitou ordered a few commissions from you.

“Have you ever thought that maybe because of how much Ai has shined for her, she just wants to be that same star for others?” you suggest, though it was more of an absentminded thought of yours that’s been in the back of your mind for a few months now. You’ve seen her passion, and her love for the craft even through its hardships. And from a stranger's perspective, she’s got the best chance of being an idol than any other normal teenager. Her mother is a manager of an entertainment agency, and her brother already has a good reputation in acting. By all means, the field was hers for the taking.

Even so, your comment seemed to shock him once more. As he stops replying for a few minutes. you try to observe his expression, to see if there’s any change whatsoever, yet, once again, he remains as he’s always been. Whether he believes it or not, you must admit, he has exceptional skill in acting. Though he might not realize himself, the very power of hiding your true emotions requires much skill, one that Aqua honed from the very beginning of his childhood. It’s a certain skill not all people possess, and certainly not all actors of his age, it is why you believe he still gets so many roles, even if he thinks his skills are lackluster at best. Human expressions are often easy to decipher and understand. You know when someone’s angry or relaxed. Frightened or excited. But with Aqua, it’s all blank, even now, you find it extremely frustrating trying to decipher his expression’s emotions, and you probably look like a psychopath with how hard you’re staring at his face. Despite that, he doesn’t give one flinch under your gaze.

“Are you sure you’re not the real stalker? ” he solemnly says. You snap back to reality, looking away a bit embarrassed (and honestly, a bit amused by his dry humor,). You quickly apologize, muttering up an excuse about being stuck on a new song that’s in your head before looking straight ahead again.

“You’re not wrong, by the way.” He speaks up again. “ I guess…it does seem fitting for her to have that kind of goal.”

You merely hum at that, but soon enough, a question pops into your mind.

“What about you?”

“Hm?”

“Why are you in the industry?” you asked and gave him a glance, soon noticing that he was glancing at you as well. “You once told me that you hated acting. Is that still true?”

“There’s someone I’d like to meet.” He replied rather quickly this time. “And the only way to meet him is by going to the top in this industry, little by little.”

“Can’t you just…call him or something? Is he that big?”

“…I don’t know.” He meekly replied, speaking in riddles at this point. “ I just know he’s an actor.” Before you could question anything further, quell all the confusion in your remind by his words, he stops dead in his tracks and looks up behind you.

“This is your spot, right?” 

You look behind you, seeing the ever-so-familiar- apartment complex your family lives in. “Uh…yeah.” You felt a bit of doubt get aced within you, and you quickly try to find out why. Soon, your eyes widened and you look at Aqua confused once again. “wait- how did you know I lived in this building?” 

He looks at you blankly. “ you talked about annoying upstairs neighbors and your elevator breaking once. The only apartment around this area is yours, and the other building don’t have enough levels to consider an elevator.”

“okay?...you seriously got all that from one conversation with me?” you smiled a bit, amused by his strange nature. 

Aqua merely hummed and shrugged. “ I’ve been told I have a good memory.”

“thoughtful, smart and handsome? Damn Aqua, no wonder everyone’s all heart eyes for you.” you teased a bit. “you’re like a prince charming and a bad boy all fit into one.”

“A bad boy?” he questioned, his tone, if one listened to it closely enough, a bit baffled by that statement. “In what terms could I be a bad boy?"

“I mean..in terms of otome games pretty much? It’s like you’re the popular kid and the aloof and quiet one-“

“So not a bad boy.”

“Hey now- one could argue that the quiet guy’s always a sort of a bad boy-“

“Does he ever commit any crimes or go against a certain system?”

“Well…no-“

“So then, not a bad boy.”

“Are you seriously arguing with me about otome characters?” you couldn’t help but chuckle, a giddy smile on your face. “Are you mad that I called you a bad boy?”

“No.” he huffed, and your excitement was further increased that he actually replied with a bemused tone rather than his normal monotone one. “ I just don’t see why anyone could perceive me as a bad boy.”

“Aqua,” you start getting amusingly serious about this discussion, completely forgetting the time and world around you. “ can we agree that a bad boy is basically the character who goes against a certain system in the story? Whether it’s the school or some sort of council?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Then you’re a bad boy.”

“You lost me.” Aqua looks at you disappointed, and you giggle at this point, feeling rejuvenated at the fact that you're slowly breaking Aqua’s ice on emotions. 

“You usually go against what a production or producer says during a show- like how you helped Akane get her reputation back after that scandal with the reality show.”

“That’s not really going against a system. I just did the right thing.”

“Spoken like a true bad boy!” you grinned. “That’s the exact words they say to the MC when they have a heart-to-heart.” 

“Do you play otome games that much?”

“Do you always have to change the conversation when I’m right?”

Suddenly, and unexpectedly, Aqua’s blank face breaks, and he laughs. He giggles like he's been holding back for hours now, and the ballon of his façade was finally popped. And his smile, oh god, his smile- it wasn’t one of politeness or fake charm, like you’ve often seen him do on that reality show, no. it was real. And it was full of huffs and wheezes, like a true laugh would be. You thought you’d merely cracked his icy expression, but you’ve fully shattered it, it seems. 

“Was what I said that funny?” you smile a bit, an unbeknownst giddy feeling taking over you from this whole ordeal. 

“No, not really-” He huffs out another laugh, yet he tries to hide it with his hands. You want to grab that hand of his and put it back down, to see that true smile of his as he looks at you, but you stay put, and let him find comfort between the hand, holding it as a mask of sorts. “ but your reactions are.” 

There’s a certain twinkle in his eye, a certain shine on his starry pupil that was always black. It was like a light was shining in it, it was looking almost like Ruby’s. it’s pure, and full of excitement, though his is more peaceful than his sister’s. you find yourself feeling your heart warm up, feeling a sense of victory over what you’ve done. Like you’ve cracked a case or solved an impossible puzzle, given a checkmate to a grandmaster in chess.

“You know, you should smile more.” You unconsciously blurt out. “It suits you.”

He doesn’t say anything to that, but it’s obvious now from his expressions ( you can’t believe you can say that now) that he’s shocked by your words, and bashful about it too. His cheeks get a rosy tint as he avoids your gaze. 

“It’s really late.” He mumbles. “You should go inside now.” 

“Right…” You sighed, now fixing up the bag on your shoulders and making your way inside. You’re one step away from opening the apartment’s door when Aqua suddenly calls out to you. As you turn around, what you see is a complete shift in Aqua’s expression, going from embarrassed and bashful to sorrowful and serious. 

“If anything happens, just text one of us.” 

Ah right. The stalker. You’ve almost forgotten about it on your walk with Aqua. though you sometimes did feel the prickling gaze, you merely ignored it, feeling safe with another companion beside you. yet now, knowing that tonight of all nights, your parents have left for a business trip together and you’re home alone makes fear in you settle in once more. You only nod in reply, now waving a bit at him then finally opening the door, and letting the fall breeze get away from you, and the sensation of warm heaters settle on your skin once more.

---

You couldn’t sleep. 

From the moment you stepped into your house, something was up. You weren’t sure what it was. Either the eery silence that filled the place or the emptiness it has now, there was something wrong with your house, and you didn’t know where to look. 

You made sure to lock all the doors and windows, turn on the TV, and put it on a reality show with the volume up just to give the potential stalker the illusion that you’re perhaps not alone. Coincidentally so, it was Aqua’s reality show that the channel was airing, so your fear-riddled and insomniac mind decided to make up a midnight snack and watch the episode.

With the blaring lights and strange love triangle (and honestly, a lack of drama compared to their Western counterparts,) you used the show as white noise as you scrolled through your phone. 

‘Just text one of us’. Sure, that could’ve been useful if it wasn’t three in the morning and everyone was asleep by now, with their phones either on silent or turned off for good measure. Everyone is offline for now, everyone, except one, you noticed. Aqua, apparently, is still wide awake, and has been online for the last thirty minutes. with a few sleepy thoughts, you decided to bite the bullet and text him.

      Y/N: hey

     Y/N: can’t sleep either?

God. That was a cringey line. You hissed a bit at your own horrible conversation starters. You only hoped he doesn’t ignore your text so you’d just awkwardly delete it by the next morning. Luckily enough, he’s seen the message, and soon little bubbles appeared on your phone. 

  Aqua: No.

  Aqua: I’m not even home yet.

Oh shit. Was your home that far from his? You felt really bad now.

 Y/n: oh :( 

  Y/N: is your place far? 

Aqua’s typing, and you’re patiently waiting for his reply by watching the TV again. Seeing how many fake smiles he puts on this show, you find yourself prideful in finding a true one tonight. Yet, a piercing fear soon latches on your pride, and you quickly look around in every direction, feeling the familiar watchful eyes. Though it was small, just like how it was at first, you can slowly feel it building up, and for a moment, you wonder if this is just your paranoia. You gulped. Your phone buzzes. 

Aqua: No. I just didn’t feel like going home right now. I like taking walks near the park at this time.

You look at your phone. The feeling pierces you. you look up. it fades away. you rinse and repeat, and with every drop of paranoia, your heart becomes an ocean of fear. You try to ignore it. it must be your imagination. There is nothing here. 

 Y/n: ohh that’s cool.

 Y/N: wish I had the confidence to do that all alone lol. I get pretty scared when I’m alone.

A loud noise erupts beside you and you flinch. You frantically look around, only to realize it was just the shocked gasp and overly edited slap sound of that infamous scene with Akane. You grumble at yourself. 

Aqua: It’s pretty easy to do when you’re mind is somewhere else entirely. Usually, people make playlists for such occasions.

At least Aqua’s texting is helping you distract your mind from that fear. You smile a bit. 

Y/n: ‘usualy people’?? what do you do? just accept the atmosphere?

Aqua: No.

Aqua: I just think there a lot.

Y/N: lmao nerd.

Aqua: You’re not funny.

Y/n: emo nerd.

Aqua: still unfunny.

Y/n: I should make you an emo song. Do you by chance like my chemical romance??

Aqua: Blocked.

You snicker, and a feeling of ease washes over you as you lightly bully him more. Though in five minutes the feeling of fear started to soothe down, it was now increased with a chime of a notification, and a message left you still and frozen. 

The name was just a phone number, one completely unknown to you. the text being as mocking as it could be by asking you, 

XXXXXXXXXX: do you watch reality shows often, Y/n? you don’t seem like the type.

 Worst part was, that it was on your normal messenger app, one usually used to get some dumb advertisements and bank account info. Whoever this guy was, they knew your phone number. It made you even more sick, and you quickly blocked them. Your breathing heightened a bit as you finally got up from your couch and clicked on every light switch in the house. With thoughts on where they could be plaguing your mind, you rush to the kitchen, grabbing the sharpest knife you can and clutching it as your life depended on it- because in fact, it did. And that makes you feel even more hopeless. 

Your phone chimes again, and unfortunately, it wasn’t Aqua. a new phone number, again, one you don’t know. The text made you want to hurl. To scream and tell whoever they were to get out and show themselves before you force them out. 

XXXXXXXXX: That knife won’t help you

Fucking hell. Shit.shit shit shit— your breathing became ragged. Your mind started spiraling all over the place with thoughts on where they could be. In the closets, the vents, the cupboards behind you—

You open them. Nothing’s in there. you take a deep breath to calm down. It fails miserably. Should you call the cops maybe?—

Your phone buzzes

Aqua: did you fall asleep on me?

Oh thank god- he’s still awake. You get up, knife on the kitchen table and inches away from you as you quickly type. 

Y/n: Aqua

Y/n: oh my god the stalker is real

You take a screenshot of the texts and send it to him.

Y/n:  I don’t know what the fuck to do

Y/n: should I call the police????

Y/n: I’m home alone rn. But I keep feeling like someone’s watching me.

You wonder for a moment, that if you texting him this seems desperate and uncalled for. Your mind quickly berates you for that. This could be life or death. It’s a potential kidnapping we’re talking about- though, then again, why not just call the police- but he did say to text anyone if anything happens- that included him, right?- Of course it did, you think. Aqua at the moment is the only awake person you can trust right now. Maybe. Maybe not. Oh god why are you thinking about this so much-

Aqua: No. don’t call them. The stalker might get away.

Y/n : ????? that’s exactly what I want to happen???

Aqua: if they get away they’ll just target someone else. Stay put, don’t freak out.

Y/n: don’t freak out??? Aqua??? I’m??being???stalked??? they know where I live????? they’re watching me RIGHT NOW???? 

In your small conscious part remaining, you wonder if you’re freaking out a bit too much. But at the moment, your hands are shaking, and you can feel yourself at the very brink of a mental breakdown. You think you might die, or something even worse potentially happening. 

Aqua: I know.

Aqua: just trust me please.

Aqua: I’m on my way right now.

Aqua: I’m not too far.

A sickening notification pops up.

XXXXXXXX: why are you crying?

Huh? Crying? Since when did you-

They send a picture of your crying, the perspective seeming zoomed in through the window of your house.

You fall silent, now noticing the teardrops that dribbled to your thumb, all coming down from your eyes like a wave. At this point, your body was shaking as if the room had been chilled to the bone. Your heartbeat has gotten so loud you can’t even think. You slowly turn your head to the window, and fall in despair over the empty displays of the buildings right next to you. 

Y/n: Aqua

 Y/n: If I die

Y/n: I’m going to fucking haunt you

Your sniffles have become louder, and you couldn’t help but just clutch your phone and knife for dear life as your eyes scan every corner. The feeling is still there. the prickling, needle-like sense of eyes watching your every flinch and tear. It felt like you were an object, like you were made to be in terror for this sick person’s amusement. All you could do now is hum your favorite lullaby and hope to dear life that it’d calm you down and you won’t die tonight.

Then, it happened. A familiar footstep slowly trudged near your door. A familiarity you never even knew it even existed. It’s the same almost quiet steps, one taken with such slow and meticulous planning, that you’d almost think it didn’t exist, that it was all just your imagination. For a long time, you thought it was. For months, you were sure it was all in your head, that these strange tip-toed footsteps and piercing gaze is merely your anxiety knowing your mind. But it wasn’t. dear god it wasn’t. the person behind that door was your stalker. Your heart is racing badly. You gulped, and a few broken breaths of gasp and tears spilled down more. You clutched the knife for dear life. Tonight was your doom.

Three knocks bang on your door. “Y/n? “ the voice, soothing yet cold, makes your senses fall down and your breath hitch. “ it’s me, Aqua.” 

Quickly, with no time to lose and a gasp of relief, you get up from your seat and scramble to open every lock you put on the door. When it opens, you’re met with an out of breath Aqua, as if he ran all the way just to get to you, yet you see no sweat on his forearms or face. But that didn’t matter to you, all that mattered was that you weren’t alone. You’re safe. Safe here. with Aqua.

“Have you been crying?” his question goes unanswered. You just look at him with more tears threatening to fall down. Your breath hitches and you break into sobs. All the shock and fear leaves your body quickly, leaving aftershocks of emotional turmoil and pain. You hug him, and you don’t know why exactly you do. it was probably from relief, from the thought of not dying tonight. But you wreak in the sobs like there’s no tomorrow as you clutch his black hoodie for dear life. Your mind is in shambles, so it doesn’t cross you odd that he hadn't gone home, yet had a complete wardrobe change now. The only thing you cared about was that he was here, and the stalker wasn’t. or at least, the stalker won’t appear. Not when he’s around.

Slowly, Aqua hugs you back. he holds you tight and lets you make a mess of tears and sniffles on his hoodie as he tries to calm you down. 

“I’m here now. There’s no need to be scared.”

Right. He’s here. and when Aqua’s here, you don’t feel that gaze on you anymore. As if it faded away entirely. When he’s here, you feel relieved. 

He really is just like a prince charming.

-----

It’s been two weeks since that accident, and due to it, you found yourself now living with the B-Komachi team all in the same apartment. 

Aqua said he checked all the streets and alleyways around him after he called Ms.Saitou that night, telling her to drive him back into their home now for safety. Saitou convinced Aqua to contact the police as well, so they could send an investigator to be on the case. You don’t know how much evidence they’ve found for now, but from how frustrated Saitou looked these days, you can guess things weren’t going well. 

“I win again!”

“What?! But I was almost first place!! You definitely cheated-“

“Ruby, did you forget I stream for a living? Obviously, I have good skills in these games-“

“still!! I was so close to winning that one…” 

-“Could you two be quiet for a minute? I’m trying to memorize my lines here-“

“Then go to another room!”

“The other rooms are too cold to sit in!”

“Then take a blanket with you.”

“No way, I’d get sleepy.”

“You’re just scared of being alone, aren’t you?”

“W-what?! N-no! Obviously not!”

You sigh, unable to concentrate on yourself now from the commotion going on behind you. you close your laptop and put it on your blanketed lap, putting on your earbuds and hoping that the girls’ enthusiasm over living together dies down in the next weeks at least. 

Living with B-Komachi has become…well- as best as it could be. It’s not like they were bad people- of course not. And you all got along well too. But the whole ‘almost dying and fearing for your entire life’ thing that happened less than a month ago has left you pretty on edge lately. You can’t bring yourself to write anything or even do anything ever. The only thing you made was a small lyrics drabble, but it was so bizarre and different from other songs you made for them that you just abandoned the whole draft. Honestly, right now all you desire is an eternal nap and an unlimited supply of your favorite songs (or as unlimited as they can get, though Spotify has been really annoying you these days with its ads). 

You want to be excited about this, to bond more with the girls and get a better understanding of who the group is and what music fits them best, but you can’t bring yourself to do it when everything feels so new and nauseating to be around. You were used to being alone, to having your parents leave on work trips on a daily and having a senseless quiet takeover of the room. having another presence in the house, and the presence being as loud as their group is, was not really helpful in getting accustomed to this new setting Ms.Saitou assured would only be a ‘one week’ thing. A precaution was just made to make sure the ‘Ai’ incident doesn’t occur again.

It was weird enough how easily Kana and Memcho accepted this situation and Kana’s parents even gave the green light, but it was even more shocking that your parents didn’t even call to check on you and just gave you a lousy text of ‘hope you’re okay’.

How they even gave permission for you to stay here was bad too. They didn’t even know you worked for Strawberry Productions- how on earth were they okay with you staying here? did they not care for you that much?

Sure, it was you who had to accept it anyway- and you did, because at this point, there was nowhere else to go. Living with your parents would only lead to depressing moments, since conversations with them always felt like speaking to a stranger rather than your own family- and relatives? Out of the question. the ones you favor are way too far, and the ones that are close aren’t near enough to your school and work.

The more you thought about it, the more your frown deepened and you buried yourself into your blanket, one of the few things you brought with you from the apartment, and one that gives you a little ounce of comfort in this unknown area.

“hey,” a shadow looms over you, and you don’t even turn around to see who it was. It was obvious from their voice. Determined, bit bossy, yet kind and well-meaning. Kana has always been the one you were closest to around here. although, that's not really saying much, since you have that feeling only because you’ve been classmates in the past, but have never spoken a word to each other. “give me some space.” She said, almost in a demanding tone- but you knew her intentions were from the immense kindness she possessed. a kindness that could be a blessing and a curse, one might argue. You tuck your legs in and scooch a bit deeper into the couch’s back, giving enough space for Kana to sit down and look at you with her intense gaze. “How are you holding up?” The question made you feel numb.

“meh.”

Her eyes squinted in slight annoyance at your response, though, you could see the underlying worry in it. “ I’m serious.” She huffed. “ it’s fine if you still feel pretty shitty. You know that, right?”

“I know.”

“so do you feel shitty?”

'Do you feel shitty?' is an amusing, yet mind-pausing question. do you? do you feel like an absolute fucking tired and exhausted and in need of a slumber of death kind of person right now? Well, to them, you probably look the part now, don’t you? Dressed in the most comfortable clothes you had, doing none of your school work, barely doing any music work and drowning yourself in your biggest comforts while dissociating from the world around you. 

“I…maybe?” your voice breaks to one of confusion. “ I don’t know what I feel,” you move around a bit, your neck feeling a bit cramped from the twist it had to remain in just to see her. “ I don’t know what to feel. “ you sighed. 

“It’s just that— well…” you stay silent for a moment, collecting your thoughts, then you speak again. “It all just happened so fast…I don’t know what to process first or last. Actually, I’d rather not process anything at all.” You turn your neck around, freeing it from its frustrating twist and now looking at the ceiling. “ I just wish I could forget it. because deep down, I know this isn’t a one-time thing.” 

“hm? What do you mean by that?”

You look at her blankly for a moment, thinking perhaps you should shut your mouth and not explain further, afraid that it’ll lead to more fear growing and breaking the calm atmosphere this apartment has despite its dark reasoning for even being occupied with idol residents at the moment. You can still hear Ruby and Memcho fighting over who gets to be player one on the game they're playing, your songs, though now white noise to your conversation, still give you a sense of peace. You’d rather hold these small threads of positivity rather than prick and destroy them one by one. Unfortunately for you, Kana Arima is a professional actress first, Idol second. And as part of her career, she has studied the human expression and it’s changes for years on end. She’s enhanced her skills, skills that easily surpass your observant ones. Just like you, she can sense the fake smiles of Aqua, she sees the stress that lays behind Saitou’s shoulders, and she absolutely can see the blank look you give her being one of conflict and hesitance. She furrows her eyebrows at you and crosses her arms. 

“Hiding all the bad things and keeping it to yourself won’t fix the issue.” She started scolding you as if you were a child, her little sibling she’s trying to give a good life lesson to. “Like it or not, you’re a part of the B-Komachi team. It doesn’t matter if you’re on stage or behind the scenes. It’s your songs that people enjoy. This whole stalker thing should be enough proof for you to realize how valuable you are to this team.”

“—Kana, we don’t even know why the stalker had me as a target in the first place— it could’ve been the same old creepy gross guys who follow high schoolers.”

 “Still,” she urged. “Hiding your feelings and digging them down won’t help. Trust me, I’ve been there.” 

You take a glance at her, and only see a face of understanding. However, there was a tint of red on her cheeks, and her eyes looked like they were far back in memory lane. It’s then you remember her huge crush on Aqua that's gotten crushed by the reality TV debacle. Even though that relationship didn’t last, purely because it was a fake one anyway, it seemed to have stung a lot for her. 

You hesitate, though come to the conclusion that what you’ll say might help with the strange situation you’ve all been cast in. After all, the last time you’ve spoken about things, you’ve survived a potential murder.

“I feel horrified.” You gulped. “ I keep— I keep feeling like this isn’t the last time I saw that stalker- it wasn’t a first time either. Something about the way they texted…the way they watched me was so oddly familiar.” You started fidgeting with your fingers out of stress, completely avoiding her gaze now. “so I’ve been thinking— and I-I know this sounds crazy but- I never walked back home after school, I always headed to the Strawberry Production building, and after my work’s done I head back home…and honestly? I never had that sense of being watched when I was walking out of school…only when I was heading back home from work I felt it— I guess- what I’m saying is-“

“You think the stalker might be working in the agency, right?”

“Y-yeah pretty much” you sighed. It felt like you were disobeying something, disrespecting a rule by accusing the very agency and team that is offering you protection. “ sounds pretty crazy, right?” you joked, desperately trying to lighten the mood. “I might be losing my mind.”

Kana is quiet. Unusually so. Her gaze remains stuck on the ground beneath you as she pouts in thought.”…you might be on to something there.”

“Wait- seriously?”

“I mean- you said it yourself.” She reasoned. “ the only time you felt like the stalker was near was when you got out of the building- and this all started happening when you joined the team in the first place, so this leads to one conclusion—“ she finally looks back up at you, a perplexed frown on her face and eyes that seemed filled with the same fear you feel. “ the stalker is someone inside the agency- specifically someone working with B-Komachi.”

You wanted to continue the conversation, to perhaps lead to a few suspects or at the very least a few key clues you could give to the detectives later, or maybe even, just investigate the whole thing yourself since they didn’t seem to be doing much. But as you were going to speak, the front door opened and everyone’s eyes quickly went to the bags of takeout, and the meticulous blonde who was holding onto them. 

“They only had one can of strawberry soda left.” He said, not understanding the war he was about to erupt.

“DIBS!!!!” Ruby’s war cry was followed with screams of NO!!, soon Kana chased after her and left you and Memcho to quietly look at each other and mourn the peace that was in this building for less than half a day. 

----

Emptied-out sodas and cardboard, oil-drenched baskets of food are left for you to pick up for the night. With the B-Komachi’s starry idols all napping soundly on the couches, too tired to even go back to their rooms to sleep, you and Aqua are left to pick up the mess from today’s banquet. 

You would go to a giant bear nap too if it weren’t for the fact that you were rotting in bed all day, then relocated to the couch when Memcho urged you to get out of the room for once in a while. For Aqua, however, you really can’t find a reason. Other than the feeling of obligation and responsibility as an older brother, that is.

“Are you done with the trash?” he quietly whispers out. you nod, closing up the black plastic bag with your palm and walking up to the small kitchen where he was, mopping up some traces of food you could barely see in the dot.

“Thanks for helping.” You whispered back, done with your last task and sitting on one of the chairs. “ you really didn’t have to.”

Aqua merely shrugged, the broom that was in his hand now placed in the small corner of the place. “ it was nothing.” Was his only response, right before he surprisingly enough, took out a chair and sat across you. he looks at you with a focused gaze- one completely different from the underlying sympathetic gaze Kana had. “how are you feeling?”

Frankly, you were a bit tired from constantly hearing this question, but you can understand why they keep asking it. not everyone comes out of a situation like this fine, or even unscathed. truth is, you feel terrible. You feel far more than shitty ever. You just want to wake up, to realize this has all been a creepy dream made up by your brain as punishment for the lack of sleep you keep giving yourself. Alas, no matter how much you blink or how muh you sleep now, you wake up in the same place. The new unfamiliar apartment and the uneasy feeling. 

This is the first time Aqua directly speaks to you after the incident, first time after seeing you sob on his shoulder like you saw your life flash between your eyes. It feels awkward, to say the least. You can’t help but avoid his gaze, too embarrassed and vividly remembering the way you held onto him that night. God dammit- how does he easily affect people this much?! He barely does anything, he’s not even flirtatious or teasing, yet, his words and sincerity are so raw and real, it makes people, and unfortunately even you, swoon. 

“fine. I guess.”

“good.” Unlike Kana, Aqua doesn’t pry much longer. He doesn’t try to spill information out of you. why that reason is, belonged to either his way of interrogating being different, or the fact that he was there in the moment, and knows that you are in fact, not fine. “ have you made any new songs?” 

A bitter taste forms in your mouth, feeling disappointment reek into your bones from your own laziness. “just some lyrics.” You muttered ashamed. Yet Aqua didn’t criticize, nor did he pressure you to work more. Rather, he asked if he could look at the work, and so you booted up your laptop and gave it for him to scroll. Usually, the first people who get to give an opinion on the work is B-Komachi’s idols themselves, then you approach Aqua to give a fan’s perspective of the work. So, to simply put, you were feelign quite nervous about the whole new ordeal, praying to the universe that you haven’t goofed up or messed up a word in the lyrics. Aqua doesn’t flinch, barely even blinks as he intently reads your newest work. It’s quite cute, how he gets so serious when it comes to idols. A little creepy yes- but still quite nice, since he never really seem interested in much anyway. Even towards his career, he seemed quite bored of it. yet with Idols and their songs, and specifically and weirdly enough, how they give hope to younger fans, he seems quite determined and entranced by it. at your first week working, he once told you that ‘the first hope in a fan ignites when they hear song resonating with them’. You never quite understood that, since all the songs you’ve heard from idols have been about hope and trying hard, but you always found those words to be just empty lies. A little motivator as white noise when you’re working to the bones for a dream that is impossible to achieve. To you, one doesn’t just ahcieve success by sheer hard-work. Usually, all you need is luck and money. Despite that ideal, look at where you are now. Gone from a small composer just sending songs online as a hobby to a full-blown career. Maybe , sometimes in the world all you need is hard-work. 

Something about that makes you feel weird.

Aqua leans away from the blaring lights of the computer, his eyes that were glued to the screen now glancing at you. you shift awkwardly for a moment, feeling your heart beat rise up as you ask the haunting question. “thoughts?”

He looks back at the computer again, then at you. his eyes were so deep in thought that for an anxious moment— you think that he might trying to formulate his harsh critcism in the nicest way possible—

“I think it’s amazing.” 

You look at him bewildered. A sense of pride slowly grows in your heart, but you urge him with your expression to continue.  

“it’s…well it’s not really B-Komachi’s style at all- but in terms of your skills- it’s the best thing you’ve made yet.” Your look is enough shock to urge him to continue. “ it feels more..like you than B-Komachi. You wrote this from the heart and it shows.”

“…huh, I never really thought of it that way..” you think back on the lyrics, remembering the undertones of worries each line had about the costs of stardom- something that was meant to be about reaching high like a star has become a criticism of such a possibility- just like Aqua said, it’s a song not fit for B-Komachi’s thoughts, but yours instead.

“ it’s moving.” Aqua said, with a normal tone and unmoving expression, yet also with eyes looking back at you with such strong wielded boldness, he comes off serious. “ it feels like I’m looking at thing in an idols real perspective rather than the perception they show for the fans.” 

“so…It’s stupidly edgy and I need to scrap it?” you huffed out, now criticizing every line you wrote within your mind. 

Aqua’s eyebrows furrow, his eyes look at you with frightening intimidation. “I want you to keep writing this.”

“woah, ok there bad boy,” You tried to shrug off the fear that jumped on your shoulders. “ why are you so serious about this?”

He takes a moment to answer, only starring at the laptop screen before him, scanning the lines once more as he speaks. “I’ve seen how you work.” For a moment, his comment comes off as jarring, until you remember the night he stayed with you till late night for the group walk. “ you often start working on a song for hours, but halfway through you get scared and give up on it. no matter how good it is, you listen to it so much that you suddenly start seeing flaws in it and you start from scratch one more time.”

Feeling embarrassed, you quickly defend yourself. “I just wanna make sure it’s catchy even by the tenth listen- it’s how you keep making fans come back for more.”

“No, you do it because you’re a perfectionist.” Ouch. That one stung a bit. “ you have so much anxiety over your work not being good enough that you don’t stop until you’re completely satisified with it.”

“W-well— well…uh…!” you desperately try to find excuses, anything that could change his mind, but you fall short, and are left speechless at his straight to the point remarks which have left a considerable stinging damage to your pride and heart. 

“keep working on this.” He closed your laptop, the dark engulfing his face and the atmosphere. He glances back at you, and in this dark, barely lit by the street lights and silent room, you see a certain sincerity in his eyes that Aqua would’ve never show in broad daylight. Aqua has always been sincere, he’s always been honest, but it was only ever visible through his actions rather than expressions. Having the Aqua Hoshino, infamous for being incredibly quiet and dry, show this level of care and volume through his starry pupiled eyes was a miracle in itself. Him laughing? That was like peaking mountain Everest, now him showingf you another vulnerability? One that, you’d guess a guy like him would see as unnecessary for him to ever even express having, show it to you? my god, it’s like you’ve travelled the galaxies. 

“you don’t need to start over again.”

“…never knew you cared that much about my health.” Your gaze doesn’t look into his, fearing you might get emotional from it.

“why wouldn’t I care?” Aqua gazed away as well, trying to avoid you seeing his face. “…I care for you.” he then quickly added, “everyone in B-Komachi does.”

You frowned, your heart was rested in confusion, and the midnight hours  and daily oversleeping has left you with a mix of emotions you couldn’t comprehend. “..it feels weird.”

“what does?”

“…you guys caring.” You hesitantly answer. A lump latched onto your throat. “..I never really…felt that before, you know?like-“ you become silent for a moment, organizing your thoughts into comprehensible sentences, and Aqua patiently waits, like he always does. “— I-I had my parents feeding me and all that, but, I never really felt like…they did it out of love, you know? it always….” You fell short, unsure of how to finish the sentence. Yet Aqua finishes it for you.

“it always…feels like they do it out of responsibility, rather than love.” There was something about his tone, something about how his shoulders hunched, and his gaze was latched to the table. How his fists clenched into a grip. It was like he’s been through this as well, that he’s felt this too. For a moment, you wonder what his father was like. Or how Ms.Saitou perhaps has treated him due to her packed up work schedule.

“Exactly.” A sigh comes out from your lungs, and a heavy weight gets back in it instead. "you know…sometimes- I keep thinking about…—” your lungs felt full, and you wanted to throw up. the stab wound that was left on your heart started throbbing in pain.

 “ ..I keep thinking about how fucking funny it is-“ you couldn’t help it. couldn’t help but let the well of emotions you had bottled up all inside of you slowly drip, spill and quickly leave like small little teardrops almost coming out of your eyes, making the world look as blurry as ever.,and you choked on your laugh a bit. “ that Kana cared more- Ms.Saitou cared more- and you, cared more than my parents ever did.” Before you knew it, your tears were slipping.” My parents didn’t even call me yet. It’s been days after the incident and they still haven’t called me. y-yet— everyday, Ruby tries to distract me with different activities- Memcho keeps trying to help with my homework- and—“ You weren’t sure what made you sob like this. Perhaps it was your mind finally breaking from the exhaustion, or maybe it’s all your pent-up emotions now blowing up in rage. Whatever it was, it’s making you sniffle and hiccup as quietly as you possibly could muster. For a moment, you’re embarrassed and ashamed from the fact that this is your second time crying buckets when you’re with Aqua. you wonder if he’s cast a spell on you, or maybe it’s just pure instinct to be so trustful of him and easily show your vulnerability to him. in some part of you, you feel like he understands you. he gets what you’re going through and knows of it’s hardships. The hardships of neglect, of loneliness, and the fear of failing the expectations loved ones set out for you.

Aqua doesn’t speak. He’s completely quiet as you hold back your hiccups and try to stray away the depressing thoughts in your mind. He gets up, walks closer to you and then opens his arms as an offer for a hug. One that you quickly accept, wrapping your arms around his back as he does with you. it’s just like last time, yet, in this one, his hug feels different. Rather than having a relaxed form and giving you access to leave if you want, his arms put you in a lock, tightly holding onto you for dear life as you cry on his shoulder and try to escape in its comforts. 

He gives you no access to leave, no way of leaving the hug he’s set you on. if your mind wasn’t so riddled, you’d be a bit perplexed and scared of that idea, but you aren’t thinking straight, not when you’re with him. right now, all you want is to have someone-anyone- who could be here for you and become a shoulder to cry on and listener to whine to, and shockingly so, Aqua has become the perfect person for it.

“….you need a break.” He mumbled, his chin resting on top of your head, eyes in deep thought. “Being stuck here for so long is only making your mental state worse.” 

“I-I don’t think a day outside is going to help much,” you speak through a sniffle. “ and what if the stalker’s still out there?  it’d put the whole team in danger.”

“the stalker won’t show up if it’s somewhere public.” He loosens up his hold a bit, and you lean away to look up at him. “there’s actually an amusement park's opening that’s happening tomorrow.” He brought up, and his conversation  and your emotional blurriness of a mind is enough for you to not realize how close you two are, inches away and looking like a married couple. Yet he, ever the cool-headed, doesn’t seem to mind the position at all. “there’ll be plenty of people there to stop any sort of kidnaping or crime happening. We should go there. it’ll help brighten your mood and quell a bit of your fears.”

“We?”  you raised a brow. It was a question you’d quickly regret, since Aqua’s face flinched a bit and he looked away ashamed.“…sorry- you can obviously go by yourself—“

“oh no nonono-!!! I didn’t mean it like I don’t want you there!-“ you spoke a bit louder than intended, a huge amount of self-cringe now stuck on your heart from asking stating your question in the worst way possible. “I just thought you might be busy- since you have that whole full time variety show job going on.” you looked down embarrassed. Somehow, meeting his gaze is so difficult. Especially at the dawn of midnight, where human emotions, even as controlled as Aqua’s, can pour out easily in one’s eyes. You fear that he might see your small affection for him, how you’ve grown close to the stoic, multiple fanclub having actor.in a moment of sleepy haziness, you gulped, fiddling with the hem of your clothes as you mutter, “I’d actually love to go with you.”

“…”

“….”

Quiet. It’s incredibly, and agonizingly silent. Your mind is screaming in terror and rage over what you’ve just muttered and he obviously fucking heard since your fucking inches away and oh my fucking god Y/n you fucking idiot you idiot you fucking dumbasss oh my goood-

You bite the bullet and slowly look up to see his, what you would assume would be weirded out or awkward expression. Yet, that’s not the case at all. rather, he’s blushing. And he looks a bit irritated with that. His hands are shaking a bit, trying to slowly go up to hide his face from you, but he doesn’t know you’re looking at him yet. That you’re seeing this evident red blush on his face once more, and the embarrassed pout he has. His gaze is far away from yours as he keeps thinking quietly, believing that you’re quietly looking away from his too.

You’re in awe. You feel like butterflies are stuck in your stomach. Your heart is in less depressive disarray and rather, it’s in an exciting mess instead. You don’t know what you should do now- or even how clearly he likes you back or perhaps, is just really flattered by what you have said. Maybe even- he’s completely embarrassed. God, Aquamarine Hoshino always keeps you guessing.

He looks back at you with widened eyes and a small gasp, his sharp mind now noticing that you have seen his embarrassed face. His hand instinctively comes up to hide it, but he knows it’s too late. He can’t help but stray away from your gaze. His starry pupil was shining once more.

“uh….” You want to die from embarrassment, but you push through it and try to not speak in the shakiest dumbest voice ever. “ so…are you free?” you weren’t sure if you wanted him to say yes or no, you’re unsure of how badly he’ll reject you, or how much coldness there would be when he begrudgingly says yes, but you hope to dear god that it’d be as less damage inducing to your heart than you believed it would be.

“it’s a weekend, so yes.” To that, you gave a sigh of relief. Muttering a ‘cool’ before going back to an awkward silence. You felt something tug your fingers, and you soon glanced and realized it was Aqua’s fingers slowly inching closer to yours, yet not doing any movement to intertwine them. As if he was waiting for your permission for such a step. You’re certain you look absolutely embarrassing right now, because the butterflies and jitters of lovestruck and glee you feel is coursing through your veins, and you’re desperately holding back yourself from smiling in pure giddy. You slowly intertwine your hands with his, hearing your heartbeat louder than ever.

Aqua clears his throat, and you hope he’s not looking at your dumbstruck face, but you can’t bring yourself to meet his gaze. “..I’m glad you like spending time with me,” he mumbled. A squeeze was giving to your palm, like it was a sign of reassurance. Sign of honesty. “because I like hanging out with you too.”

You were going to pass out. You were speechless, mind processing every little word and action he’s done up until now, desperately trying to understand how he’s gotten you so flustered this easily. You truly don’t know what to say, but rather than remaining quiet and letting a new and worse state of awkwardness set in, you bring your intertwined hands up, and quickly peck his knuckles and release your hold. You don’t even look to see his reaction, feeling your panic rise up from the unthinkable action you’ve just done. You quickly say thank you and bid goodnight, speed-walking as quietly as you could, while trying yo not hit any of the idols who were sound asleep on the ground and completely unaware of what has transcribed in the kitchen.

You want to shut your door as fast as you can, but before you do, you steal one more glance at the kitchen, and see Aqua with a widened, indescribable expression on his face, and the blush redder than it ever was, starring at his kissed hand as if it was a raw diamond from the mines.

You shut your door, and immediately jump and scream into your pillow.

What the fuck did you just do?!

------

Chitters and chatters of the crowd dulled the sound of drums and flutes that was coming from the carnival. children and adults of all ages frolicked at the new park like ants, trying everything and taking pictures at every corner they knew. The animal mascots happily engaged with the kids and played different carnival games with them (all whom were rigged, but when the mascots played they’ve instantly became fair.) the smell of candy and pretzels was invading your senses, and you found yourself craving for cotton candy as you walk by the stalls.

Aqua Hoshino, the man who made you think so much last night that you barely got a wink of sleep in you, yet you’re so nervous and excited about today that you’re thankfully not dying from exhaustion-, is walking beside you. his eyes trail on where your head turns too, and he notices you staring a bit too longingly at the cotton candy cart with a circle of parents and children around it.

“you want something?” he asks, yet you look at him and politely shake your head. You’d rather die than make someone else pay for your cravings, especially something as childish as cotton candy-

Aqua’s eyes squint a bit, and he hums. He leaves your said, walking closer to the pink cart. You frantically follow suit.

“w-what are you doing?”

He gives you a glance before answering. “I’m hungry.”

“oh.” you slow down your pace. “ok then.”

You patiently wait as Aqua waits for his turn, buying one cotton candy and walking ip to you. he takes one bite, and you never knew how strange of an image is to see such a cold guy like Aqua eat sweets, especially since he doesn’t seem to be enjoying it much. You get suspicious, and that feeling only grows when after one slow bite and gulp, he offers the pink fluff to you.

“I can’t finish it.”

“ but you only had one bite?!” you countered.

He merely shrugged. “my eyes were bigger than my stomach, I guess.”

You pout, looking at the cotton candy as if it was a trick lied up by a scummy fox. Yet, it looked so delightful. A pink shade so soft, and a sticky shine to it that left your mouth watering. You begrudgingly take it, looking at Aqua inquiring. “you bought this for me, didn't you?”

Aqua doesn’t answer, because he knows he doesn’t need to. he merely looks at you with a tiny bit amusement in his eyes as he says, “ if you don’t eat it now it’ll melt and your hands will get sticky.”

“oh, are you beckoning Snow White to take a bite of the apple?” with your nervous anxieties treading away slowly, your shyness was melting faster than the cotton candy in your hand.

He rose a brow. “are you saying I’m the evil witch?”

“No, of course not.” You smiled, as if you hit the jackpot. “I’m saying you’re the gorgeous Queen.”

 “isn’t that character the same character, though?”

“hm, that is true,” you ponder for a moment, instinctively twirling the cotton candy in your hands. “…then you’re the prince, I guess.” You looked up at him with a grin. “ gorgeous and beckoning. It’s a perfect fit.” You stare at him, looking like you’re a snarky winner, a playboy who won the popular boy’s affection, yet rather than blushing like you wanted him to, he stays silent for a moment, but his mouth keeps shifting- like he’s holding back a smile. He finally breaks, giving you a subtle smirk and looking down at your hands.

“the cotton candy’s falling.”

“the what-“ your eyes quickly widened, looking at your hand and seeing the cloud-like candy being seconds away from hitting the pavement underneath you. in a quick disarray, you regrettably grab the thing with your bare hands, groaning in disappointment, yet still taking a bite of it. you hear a snicker, and look back to see Aqua looking at you with a small smile. If someone told you last month that ‘smiling’ would actually be a common expression of Aqua’s, you’d holler and laugh, yet here you are.

He takes a candy off your palm and eats it. your shock increases, and becomes extremely apparent on your face. He looks at you with a certain competitive glint in his eyes. “ what?” he questions your reaction. “I’m not the Evil Queen I’m the prince, so of course, I wouldn’t give you anything poisonous now, would I?” though his face has become blank, you could hear the hint of giddiness in his tone. “so you should eat what I give you, Snow White.”

Though he wasn’t wrong, a small part of you felt like he was much more serious about his words than he let on. there was something about his tone, an underlying certainty you can’t quite pin well. nevertheless, you trust him, so you take another cotton candy and let it dissolve in your mouth.

Soon after, you quickly went to the bathroom to wash up the last remaining's of the cotton candy, then decide to go on the fastest roller coasters you knew. In every single ride, Aqua either just gave a short gasp from the lack of air or just- quietly held onto his seat with  mortified expression on his face. Meanwhile you and other passengers were screaming your lungs out like never before. After the rides, he’d ask you ,with a tinge of plead in his voice, if this is the last one you want to try, and he’d look at you deeply puzzled when you answer no.

After so many rides, exhausted, you take a break at the café as the sky darkens. Aqua insisted on paying, but you managed to convince him to split the bill instead. The small place you chose had their walls filled with drawings of its mascots. Actors and entertainers all frolicked around the place and stole the children's attention. The smell of pizza was engulfing itself in the air, making most customers give in to temptation and order more than just coffee.  Aqua left to place the order moments ago, so you were mindlessly scrolling through your phone, trying to silence the loud cries of a four year old sitting across the window in your mind. The light on top of your table leaves a warm aura on your head ever few seconds, and soon, when you see a shadow loom over you, and it’s smell was riddled with smoke, your posture stiffens as you realize it’s not Aqua. you look up, seeing a guy around your own age, dressed in a leather jacket with tattoos riddled on him. not a good sign- but  they did say to never judge a book by it’s cover. Though..that snarky smirk on his face, added in with the glint of pride in his black eyes gives you the sudden urge to run and avoid. But, you stay still, and when you see he hasn’t spoken yet, but keeps staring at you, you clear your throat and put your phone down. “uh…may I help you?”

His nose scrunched up, his smirk becoming a grin. You want to die. “ what’s a pretty thing like you doing here all alone?”

You hold back your scowl. Best not to evoke rage in this guy. “ I’m not alone.” You say it clearly. “ I’m actually with a friend right now. he just went to order.” You hoped he’d get the message.

He raises a brow, as if he was challenged to a brawl by a wimpy brave kid thinking they could defeat him. his whole posture screams cocky bastard as he leans a bit down to your level.

“you mean that celebrity blonde over there?” he points to Aqua, whom was waiting in line. he then scoffed. “ what are you doing dating an attention-seeker like him? did you want something exciting to happen?” don’t punch him don’t punch him don’t punch him-

You hold back the urge to pull on his black hair and shove him to the ground. Though, you do give him a disgusted glare. One which he gave an amused one back.

“what? Did I hit it right on the nail?” quite the opposite, actually. This fucker really doesn’t know what he's talking about, and it’s obvious that he’s just trying to cause a scene just to prove something to those friends of his outside the café. You wonder why no security guard has approached them yet. By now, you’re glancing around the crowd hoping for an employee to see your obvious discomfort and usher him out. however, a part of you fears that that’s exactly what he’d want. An attention seeker at heart, he seems like.

Seeing as you gave no response, he continued. “ if you want excitement so much, why not ride along with me and my friends?—“

“—and you are?” the sudden calm voice of Aqua brings relief into your heart. Your head quickly snaps back to him, seeing that he looks rather irritated- annoyed even, by the sudden man’s interruption in your hang out. he gives you a small glance of concern, then his face shifts to one of annoyance once more when he looks back at the guy whose only inches away from you and very visibly making you feel uncomfortable.

“I’m the better guy for them.” You couldn’t hold back your snort.

“I don’t even know you.” you managed to bring up through your laugh. Though- the laughter was more out of stress than amusement. It was a strange amalgamation of both of those feelings.

Aqua takes one more glance at you, his eyebrows furrowed deeper. “ look, you’re making my friend uncomfortable. I suggest you leave before I ask an employee to call security on you.” 

The guy seemed to want to quarrel more, to show his ‘superiority’ in some way, but thankfully, the manager quickly came into the picture and asked for the guy to leave. He did, though not without sending a few death glares to Aqua and the people who were ogling at him. when Aqua finally sat down, and the chatters of the people around you started again, you found yourself smiling.

“are you okay?” Aqua asked, his eyes quickly scanning to see if you’re still uncomfortable or maybe even hurt. Only to be left confused when he saw the small smile that was on your face. “seriously, are you okay? Are you having a stroke?”

You felt a giggle bubble up in your chest. “I’m fine.” You grinned. “I’m fine, because you’re here.”

Aqua froze, looking down at the table.it is here you come to the conclusion that Aqua often avoids your gaze when you flirt, as if he’s trying to hide the windows to his soul, to what he’s feeling from your actions and words.

“….you really need to stop saying those cheesy pick-up lines.”

“but you seem to like them!”

“on the contrary, I don’t.” he lied through his teeth, and for an actor, his performance on this was very lackluster. his actions made you feel like a winner.

“for an actor, you sure are a horrible liar.”

He says nothing, and you remain victorious.

-----

 With the sky almost pitch black, and the sun no where to be seen, the carnival booths were one of the only light sources through your walk. In the amidst of the loud, shining and overbearing colors of knick knacks and toys  between the booths, a certain plushy catches your eye.

“oh my god- there’s no way-“ you couldn’t believe it for a moment, and you didn’t notice the confused look Aqua sent you as you speed-walked to a small booth full of plushies, Through al the  teddy bears, fluffy bunnies and kuromi merchandises, there was a small, adorable little Kaito from Vocaloid plushies that absolutely charmed you. it was a mad hatter themed one, all from the iconic hat to the purple-ish zany suit. You see no game set up, which made you conclude that this is just a shop set up through all the booths. A place for anyone to buy a plushie if they just didn’t win anything.

“do you want it?” Aqua’s voice startled you. you looked back at him, glanced back at the beckoning adorable dopey face of Kaito and then gave a look at the price- shit- that’s a lot of money for just one plushie- and then it hit you- this was a limited time one, so with so many small amounts around with this high quality, the price is set high. Dejected, you just shrugged. “I mean- I find it adorable…”

You look at the price again and wince. “…but no I don’t want it that much. "that's a lie. You’d fucking sell your soul for it. “it’s getting late, we should go home.”

Aqua stays silent. You walk a few steps before you notice that he’s not following you. looking back, you see him staring at the plushie for a second too long- then walking right towards you. silence takes over the walk back home, and though it was a comforting one, you didn’t want the hang out to end without you thanking him. yet your words came to a halt as you heard a ‘CLANG!!!’  only a few feet away from you. both of your movements came to a halt, quickly locating where the sound has come from, and seeing a group of teenagers, all dressed in leather jackets, fight off in the dead of night.

“oh shit.” Was your first response, seeing some blonde beat the shit out of a brunette kid. “are they like- a gang?—” you look at it with more curiosity, your eyes widened as you saw a familiar bastard getting his guts punched. “—that’s the guy from the café!”

No response. in a fearful instinct, you quickly shift your head to see if Aqua is even here or not. Much to your relief, he was, yet, there was something different about him. he no longer looked calm, or perplexed as he often does. Rather, his pupils were blown wide, and the white shiny star you saw the whole evening was gone once more. His posture seemed tense- shaking a bit even. He looks at something across the road, and he finally speaks.

“there are multiple bikes over there there. it must be theirs.” Oh, so they’re a bike gang. You wanted to take a glance at the bikes too- yet the sudden shout of pain from the brutal fight stole your attention. You could see specks of blood now. You gulped.

“should we call—“ a sudden strong grip takes your wrist. You flinched, looking at the perpetrator being an extremely different Aqua from who you’ve shared cotton candy with only hours ago. He looks at you with furrowed brows, and eyes you could only describe as vicious. As if he was ready to pounce on someone and rip them apart. You feel your breath shorten a bit, an uncomfortable weight set on your shoulders, and your wrist going red from the sheer grip he has on it, like handcuffs made of the heaviest metal.

“Y/n,” your name comes out of his mouth like a threat, his tone like a demand. “ we have to go. Now.” He doesn’t even let you reply. Doesn’t even let you take one more pause before leaving. He drags you away to an alleyway, empty and much more horrifying than the gang fight you just witnessed. You try to keep your cool, though your heart is beating up a storm and your mind is screaming for you to escape. Aqua Hoshino looks different. He feels different. His grip, with the gentle palm of his, feels like death itself. You could see your wrist bruising, and could feel your eyes tearing up. his eyes are cold. In the past, they’ve merely looked dead. As if he was repressing everything he felt. But it’s not the same here, rather, his feelings here are as clear as day, the feelings of malice and distrust, dark thoughts that you can’t guess the concept of. You feel sick, and you’re not sure why. It’s still Aqua- right? He's just being paranoid…right? why does this feel awfully familiar? Why does his footsteps give you a sense of déjà vu?

You didn’t like that thought. Hell, you didn’t like thinking about anything right now. You gulped, hoping it would dim down your fear, yet it only increased it.

“Aqua.” your voice shakes a bit and you hiss. “Aqua—I think we’re far enough now-“

Nothing. No answer, not even a hum like always. The only thing you get is mutters too whispered for you to comprehend it's words. Which only fueled more of your fear. “Aqua please—“ you try to stop your legs from moving, yet he dragged your wrist, making you yelp from the sudden pain. “fucking hell Aqua—“

“Aqua!” you put all your strength to come to a halt, and you try shake your wrist away from his grip. Fear takes over your mind when you find no escape from it. 

He seems to be in a trance, too in his own mind to even hear your pleads. You felt like you lost- and when he tries to drag you to walk faster- the grip practically ripping your wrist apart- you couldn't help but scream.

“Stop it! “

All walking and scraping comes to a halt. Your wrist is freed, and you give a cry of relief as you pull your hand close and rub the newly purple bruise. You find yourself gasping for air- as if you've been holding back breaths this entire time, and the drums of your heart is so loud, you didn’t realize you were practically shaking from fear. You think for a moment- desperately trying to process what the ever loading fuck has just happened moments prior. And the throbbing pain from your wrist wasn't helping.

You hear a shift- a scrape on the pavement and look up to see Aqua.

His breathing has become ragged, his form shaken up. as if he has witnessed a scene from his nightmares, his eyes are widened and lost. His mouth is shaking, as if he’s desperately trying to form words, yet his mind was so muddled, he couldn’t even bring his voice out. he looks at you with such immense guilt, glances at his own palms with such horror. You almost forget the horrid pain in your wrists. Almost.

“…what the fuck was that?!” your voice shakes. You wanted to kick something- wanted to lay down somewhere and sob- you wanted to punch him in the gut- fucking hell. “what the fuck was that?” you didn’t mean to repeat the question, but your feelings were so out of spiral, your heart couldn’t help it.

Aqua shakes even more.

“Shit.” Aqua Hoshino, kindest guy you’ve known up until now, swears. ”Shit!” he repeats in a cry. He reels in a breath, but he still shakes. he brings him palms up to his face, trying to hide his broken down expression. But, no amount of palms can hide the glossy tears that you see slipping down the pavement.

Shit.

Your mind is in complete and utter chaos now. You’re so confused, yet you don’t even want answers anymore, in fear of what they could even be. You don’t say anything. You can’t bring yourself to. all you can do  is watch as the ever-so-calm and poised Aquamarine Hoshino breaks down. You wonder if you should comfort him. your wrist flashes a screaming pain in protest. You purse your lips and hold back a grunt.

“I’m sosorry- I-I didn’t mean to,” his hands come down from his face, revealing to you the absolute sheer panic he’s in. eyes like needles- with his starry on pupil darker and smaller than it ever was. Wrinkles all etched up on his nose with brows furrowed in shame. “Fuck, I'm sorry. I-I messed up.” this was so insane. This was too weird. Too out of character for him. never in your life have you heard this man stutter, or even have such a shaky and broken voice. In a second, your mind wonders if this is all some weird dream. Despite that thought, the cool air of fall shivers down your spine and devastatingly reminds you that this, in fact, is reality. Aqua just bruised your wrist and now is breaking down at the back of an alleyway.

He takes a step close to you. his breathing hitches when you take a step back. he looks at you as if you're the one who hurt him, as if this is more painful to him than it was to you.  “Y/n,” your name comes out so softly now. Barely even a whisper. A complete contrast to the brutal one from before. It’s like he has two sides- it’s as if he has a bottle full of emotions he kept shut tight, and now one by one, they’re all spilling out with no stop. “I’m— I’m so sorry,” he repeats through tears. ”I didn’t mean to..!” he hiccupped. He hiccupped. “ I just—….I thought—“  he breaks down again. Exhaustion takes over your mind. You conclude that for tonight, he is obviously not ready to express anything. His mind is warped up with thoughts- memories and ideas that you wish you could see for yourself.so, you do what he has done for you. you walk up to him. your frown was shrouded in disappointment, of a ruined night and a bruising pain, yet your eyes were full of sympathy. You know this was hard for him. apart of you, the softest part of you, knew he didn’t mean to hurt you. though your wrist and mind were practically begging you to quickly leave him, you listened to your heart, like you’ve always had. You bring your hands up to his teary face, and clean the droplets away. he stays still in shock, then fully leans into your touch. He keeps crying, and soon notices the bruise on your wrist, on the very palm he's leaning in. you don't know how, or even why, but he, as gentle as ever, takes your hand by the fingertips, and pulls your hands a bit up, then, gently gives kisses to your bruised wrists as he repeats ‘sorry’.

You, really, really don’t know what to say. You can’t even comprehend if you’re horrified or flustered. Your crush is kissing your wrists, it should be a rejuvenating moment- yet it’s the very wrist he bruised up, the very wrist he kept dragging as if there was a bomb behind you. you merely hitch a breath, letting him do what he can in the disarray he's in. this is all just confusing to him, you try to reason. He’s never had such waves of emotions go through him before, he’s not thinking straight. That’s all.

No matter how much you try to excuse, try to reason or try to process even the smallest second of this strange situation, there’s the inkling of doubt slowly becoming deeper.

You let him sob, and you let him affectionately kiss your wrist better, but you can’t bring yourself to be lovestruck by this. Something feels wrong. Something feels hidden. You want to think deeper about it- but god damn it- the soft kisses are so distracting. They’re so enchanting- he looks straight out of a romance manga. And the soft touches is slowly making you forget the hellish grip he had on you- the strength he secretly bares.

-----

You didn’t really talk to Aqua after this.

Sure, he walked you into the apartment and you bid goodbyes. But that was it. no text, no see you, no nothing. You couldn’t bring yourself to even look at him anymore, afraid you’ll see another Aqua again. Someone different from the real Aqua you knew, and the stoic one you’ve come to see when he's with others. you fear you’ll see the dead Aqua. the vicious one who frets over your safety as if you’re a delicate glass. You've come to wish you’d never see that dead set eyes of his again. You can’t think much about what has conspired. Your mind pretty much blocked out everything, and urged you to just close your bedroom door shut and sink deeper into your bed.

Though, Aqua did try to speak. He did try to text, to call, hell even knocked on your door and asked if he could come in. but you never texted back, never accepted the call nor let him in. you didn’t want to see him, unsure of how much you can handle looking at his eyes without remembering the wincing pain or the hot tears that were on your fingertips. You didn’t process it yet, didn’t give yourself the time to pause and think. Only distracted yourself with the song he urged you to work on. you felt a bit confident for what you've done, realizing you did have some sort of power in your strange relationship, that you’re not completely helpless and prone to get hurt in his very in need of therapy tantrums- but on the other hand- you felt like a completely monster. You let this man show his most vulnerable sides to you, you let him cry on your shoulder, as he let you. but now you’re shutting off all contact with him? you sound like a wacked witch who basks in everyone else's despair. Who only used Aqua for their own ends. You couldn’t handle the guilt, and so you didn’t think about his constant offers to talk to you either- you just worked, slept, ate, and went through it all over again. Only opening your doors at the latest of nights, the girls rarely even saw you come out of your room.  Ruby and Memcho took it as you probably having a squabble with Aqua, but Arima, the ever so intelligent and observant, seemed to notice something deeper than that.

Anytime Aqua knocked on your door, it was quickly replaced with Kana confronting him on what happened. She doesn't have that shy tone she always did when around Aqua, and you were almost certain that she didn’t have that soft gaze either. Not with how loud and accusing her voice is through the door. She keeps demanding for an answer, constantly blocking the oath between your door and him, telling him to either explain the situation or stop forcing you to let him in. Aqua always answered the same, he’s not sure if you’re comfortable with everyone knowing, so he won’t share anything either.

You banged your head on your pillow and screamed into it with full rage.

Multiple problems, zero solutions and endless self-hatred. This was becoming unbearable. Not even your most favored hobby, the very thing you made a career out of, is helping you cope through this. Your favorite movies have become dull distasteful garbage you don’t want to see ever again. Your skills have become an amateur's- a complete parody of the song you intended to write. You feel immensely empty, and the constant sleeping has made your head feel heavy, and even sleepier than before.

You really need to talk to Aqua.

But you don't want to talk to Aqua.

But you miss him

But you're scared of him.

You scream into your pillow again.

You can’t get the scene out of your head- the crying, the kisses, the bloody gang fight happening a few feet away- though some dialogue feels blurry, every face of anguish Aqua had is in highest quality in your head.

You can’t even upload the song you were working on anymore- you realized how the tone keeps shifting- from solemn quiet to a hyper song- then quickly into one of jumbled chaos- the lyrics re in no good shape either. They look like lyrics from different song genres all copy and pasted into one draft. You can’t even comprehend what you were trying to write here. A dreadful, slow knock echoes through your door. You don’t have to think twice to know who it was.

“…Y/n, I know you’re mad at me. and I don’t blame you.” his tone made your gut churn in grief. You couldn’t think straight anymore- what were you supposed to do? you still haven’t decided on a thing. You don’t know if you should forgive him, or be the one who asks for it. you wait for him to talk more, count the seconds before Arima barges in the halls and demands Aqua for at least a small clue on what happened. But nothing came. Not even a noise, nor a muttered chatter. The only thing you hear was a sigh, and small shuffling on the ground. After, it was footsteps, each one quieter than the last.

You see a small shadow still looming over the creeks of your door. You try to dig up a few memories- a few personality traits of Aqua’s to guess what it could be behind that door, and if it's worth opening the door for. Your heart stops in a moment of realization, the shadow of a top hat making your frown deepen, and your stomach drop in more pounds of nausea and pity. You wish you could throw up, but nothing comes out of your mouth. You’re ever-so confused, and when you open the door and see the small little Kaito plushie you could feel your eyes water up a bit.

“goddamn it Aqua.” you muttered. Upon inspecting it more, you see a little note inside his pocket, one you don’t remember being there at all. you take it out, fix up the crumble and take a deep breath when you see the words written within it.

Fuck it. you made up your mind. You heard the gate door below you being closed, so with a panic, you rush out of the house, ignoring every confused grunt and question thrown at you by the idols. You put your shoes on as if they’re sandals, you don’t wait for the elevator, and rather run down the stairs as if it were a slide. You hurriedly open the gate door and shut it with a bang.

“AQUA! WAIT!”

the figure merely a few feet away from you stood there frozen. Just like the night before.

Drip drip

Cold little specks of water startled you both. You glance up, realizing the grey mood the sky has been in as well. drip drip, it came down like a song. A beat that soon turned into a melody, small little taps becoming loud serenades and soaking you both.

Aqua turns around to look back at you, but his gaze never meets your eyes. “ we should go back in- we can talk there!” he shouted, walking up to you. “ you’re going to get a cold with the clothes you’re wearing.”

Huh? What's the problem with your- oh, right. one look down and you can see your shirt was completely drenched, and your pants were not warm enough either. A shiver ran down, the cold water now sinking into your body.

“No. we can’t.” yet, you deny it. you stop him from going farther away from you and closer to the entrance. You make him look right into your eyes. “we can’t talk there. it’ll be awkward with the team around.”

“you’d rather stay out in the rain with your pajamas rather than facing some small embarrassing tension?”

“yes.”

He gave a huff, a small laugh that eased a small bit of tension that was between you two. But the amusement died down quicker than a flash, and you were both just staring at each other, waiting for the other to speak.

With the rain acting as your white noise, you collected your thoughts and spoke. “Aqua— I’m so sorry-“ your voice breaks. “you- you had a breakdown right in front of me and I just- I just closed the door at you. I’m so sorry.” you don’t let him cut you off, you grab him by the shoulders, urging him to stay quiet and just listen. “ I got scared, because I didn’t know what to do. I-I got stuck- I kept thinking that whatever I do, it won’t be enough. It won’t help you properly. And I wasn’t sure if I was mad at you for the bruise or-“ Aqua’s face flinched to a pained one from that sentence. “ –I was mad at myself for not saying anything when we got back to the apartment. You don’t have to apologize for the bruise. You..uh..you already did do that right after…so..”

You awaited his response. awaited the insulting words or disappointed tone you’ll get for the cruelty you’ve done to him. but that didn’t come. “Y/n,” how does he always charm you with that soft voice of his? How has he never considered becoming an Idol? For the first time in days, he gazes right into your eyes, making your heart beat quicken. Shining so bright, and so full of sorrow and guilt, his expression was not like one of a prince, nor a bad boy. But a human’s. this was the real Aqua Hoshino speaking to you. with the crinkled up muscles on top of his nose, the mouth with a frown one wouldn’t see on a hot guy’s face in a romcom, and a voice unable to be recorded in studios. “why are you the one apologizing?” he almost laugh, it comes out as a scoff. “ I thought you were going to tell me to never see you again- I-…“ he got quiet, ad just like that night, his thoughts seemed to be quicker than his voice. Quicker than the words that were trying to come out from his mouth. “…I though you were just ghosting me because you were mad at me- yet here you were thinking you’re the one who should apologize?” you can’t describe his expression. it looked like one of lovestruck and guilt, of amazement and amusement, sorrow and sarcasm. “ why are you apologizing? I’m the one who ruined the night.” He sighs, one that comes out like a puff of cloud in the cold rain. “ I don’t know what happened that night. I don’t know why I just-…I....just-…”

“blew up?”

He winced. “yeah, blew up.” he repeated, confirming it to himself.

“Well…” you take his hand in yours, hoping it would provide comfort in the truth bullets you’ll shoot. “Maybe…it’s because you keep constantly bottling up your emotions- and you’ve been doing it for a very long time- and that night when everything was quite overwhelming- your mental stability kinda..couldn’t..handle it anymore?”

He looks at you with horror, as if you’ve just uncovered a murderous secret. A quiet moment passes, and you hope you hadn’t misread and offended him- Aqua chuckled.

“ it’s..really funny.” You looked at him confused, unsure of what that comment even meant. “I mean, scary how you can read people so well..yet you thought I was going to hate you from now on.” you started getting flustered, yet he continued. “ I don’t think I’d ever hate you.” it’s as if a switched has flipped within him- a switch that always clicks to the other side when he's with you. it’s out of his control. His feelings for you is too much for him to handle and organize, and bottle up with the others. it always bursts out, and with it, other feelings stick to them like glue to get out too. “ every time I’m with you..I feel comfortable. I feel happy. I feel like I can be myself for once.”  He’s looking at you, however, his mind seemed to be somewhere else. Somewhere deep within his heart, trying to articulate and put his feelings to words. “ that night…I got scared. I kept thinking that those guys were going to hurt you…or that-“ something in his eyes shift. “maybe they were the stalker. I didn’t want them to hurt you and I didn’t want you to get scared..but in the end,” his eyebrows scrunch up in hate. “I ended up ruining the night all by myself.”

“well- I wouldn't say you ruined the whole night…”

“please don’t lie.” He grumbled.

“I’m not lying! I still had a lot of fun.” You squeeze his hand, a sign of reassurance. “ those moments I had with you at the amusement park? Better than any birthday I ever had. Wouldn’t trade it for the world.”

He’s quiet for a moment, squeezing your intertwined hand multiple times like a heartbeat. “me neither.”

You dare to inch a little closer, look at his eyes a bit deeper, get lost in it’s blinding blue. The blue never reminded you of the sea nor the sky. With the very star laid in it’s right iris, it rather reminded you of a galaxy. An infinite space of beauty. Despite the rain being a nuisance on various aspects- you will thank it for one thing- the dampness that Aqua’s hair has faced- the way the strands stick close and an inch away from his eyes, how they fit perfectly with the stage right inside his starry pupil, it makes him look perfect. It reminds you that Aqua is a real person, not an ice prince, or a robot who would yelp at the sight of rain and malfunction. He's not the Aqua he intends to be, but he is the Aqua you’ve grown to adore…that you've grown to…

“Can I say something crazy?”

“you’re in the rain in your pajamas.” He remarked. “ I think you’ve already reached that level.”

“these are not pajamas, rich boy.” You retorted. “these are casual clothes.”

“I’m not a rich kid.”

“your mom owns an entire agency-“

“well-“

“you’re an actor.”

“not-“

“you have multiple fan clubs dedicated to you, have you seen the accounts that come up in twitter when you search your name?”

“..No,” he smirked. “have you?”

Caught in your argument, you choked on your words. “N-no! of course not!- I’m just very unfortunate enough to have them pop up in my for you page since I follow you.”

“…Y/n.”

“yeah?”

“I don’t have twitter.”

SHIT.

Bamboozled and befuddled, and not to mention, stuck in your own tom-foolery, you couldn’t handle the embarrassment and hid your face in his chest. An action of which he gave a hearty laugh too through the shivering cold.

“I won.” He takes his hands out of yours. Before you could grumble about the lost warmth, he wraps his hands around your waist, bringing you closer.

“no you didn’t.” there was no way you were backing down. “ your sister’s also an idol.so by all means, you’re a full on rich kid.”

“don’t use my skills on me, love.”  Love. Oh god, the old-school nickname is making your heart skip a beat.

You don’t say anything back, your tongue twisted in shock. All you could do was look at Aqua in the same lovestruck way he was looking at you.

“So what were you going to say?”

You shrug and roll your eyes, but your excitement is apparent, and you weren't really known to be a good actor. “forget it, the moment’s ruined.”

“I’ll tell everyone else that you secretly follow my fanclub’s page.”

“you wouldn’t.”

“I very much would.”

“fine.” You clicked your tongue, shoulders having a bit shakiness in them as you gaze up right into his eyes, head only mere millimeters away from yours.

“I think I like you.” it comes out in a blur, and you’re left to falter with an explanation. “like….a lot.”

The rain wouldn’t stop. It just grew heavier by the second. you’d think the rain would make you two get shelter at some point, but your bodies didn’t comply to the cold. For you, it was warm enough in his embrace.

“I think I love you.” he mumbles. Your hand gets out of his grasp and lays softly on his cheek. Unsure of what to do other than lean into your palm, Aqua, in a fit of passion, quickly asks-

“can I kiss you?”

In  a swift second, you close the gap. His clutch around you tightens a bit in pure giddy, and you wrap your arms around his neck in an instant. Warmth was spread all over your body, his cold lips from the weather were still as soft as a cloud and as sweet as a sugarplum. You could feel him smiling in the kiss. You could feel your body jittering up in happiness as the tip toes of your shoes tap the pavement. The warmth he provided, the love he poured, everything he did and everything he is, you adore. You wish you could say I love you back, but your lips were too preoccupied smiling and giggling between kisses with him. there was no shrilling cold, no tapping rain or soaking shirts. it was just you and Aqua, trying to show your love within every kiss.

-----

“HAHA!” a victorious and ever so notorious laugh comes out of Ruby Hoshino. Meanwhile, a very sad Memcho rummages through her pocket for some money. “ I knew they’d kiss! Woah- they’re- they’re not stopping-“ she looks at the scene almost horrified. “uh…ok no this is gross now.”

“ah let them be, it’s young love, after all.” Memcho put the hundred yen on the counter. Soon though, she hissed at her own words. “god..I sound like a thirty year old wine mom…”

“wait- they kissed?! What the hell?!” Arima Kana has been frantic all week. From her almost-kidnapped- friend looking very worse for wear, to her ex-crush acting much colder than before to anyone else- all while her almost-kidnapped-friend came home late with a bruise on their wrist- she was certain things ended really badly between the two. Disastrously, even. All while the two wouldn’t say a thing to her- especially the almost-kidnapped friend whom finally opened up a bit- and she thought the two of them were now one step-closer to a deeper friendship, a strong bond that will last even after she announces her leave with the B-Komachi team.

“told you they'd kiss.” Ruby said, full of pride. “ I’ve been living with Aqua for years. It was obvious that he’s lovestruck.”

Arima didn’t retort anything back. she only looked down at the giddy composer whose surely about to get a cold in worry. Something was up. something felt wrong. Rather than bearing slight jealousy and an urge to tease the newly couple, she only feels danger. A calm before a storm. Something about the gaze Y/n had when they came home late, the way they didn’t ramble on lovestruck like she thought they would. The way Aqua’s words started feeling empty, and his expressions becoming fake. Being an actor has a sort of kinship, a sort of understanding between the community. You can easily decipher when someone’s lying, and can easily understand when a fellow co-worker is acting.

At first, she thought that Aqua was simply acting like a charmer just to make you stick to the team like glue. Quite scummy if you ask her, and admittedly, a very Aqua Hoshino-thing to do. yet, there is something different in the way he acts around you. it’s…a different method. He’s not pulling out words and feelings that are in truth, empty promises and white lies. Rather, he’s hiding a deeper agenda. A deeper agenda she can’t understand. What’s even worse is how happy he looks underneath the rain with you. truly happy. As if there was no lying to begin with, merely a boy trying to act ‘cool’ in front of his school crush.

But something felt wrong.

She cannot point fingers, and she cannot blame anything. But she knows deep in her gut that something is awfully fishy about this. Something feels planned, fabricated. The stalker, the gang fight, the plushie with a note right on your door, it all felt too romantic to be true. Too thought-out. if she were in Aqua’s position, if she were to take on the role of Aquamarine Hoshino in a play, when her beloved would be threatened by a kidnapping or death, wouldn’t she do the Aqua-centric action, and become overly-protective? Wouldn’t she try to live with the group, or give daily visits just to check on her crush, rather than visit every week-end and make them crave her presence?  She would’ve quickly gotten her nose deep into the stalker case, and find every strand of hair and fingerprint she could of the culprit, not nonchalantly tell the beloved to go outside with her tonight, on a very busy day, with all kinds of people, and then have the bad-luck get stuck in a gang-fight.

Aqua is hiding something, Aqua isn’t acting like the Aqua she knows, the Aqua she observed and studied for a time. The deeply kind and protective teen who acts like a cold prince with a warm heart. What she fears most, what she hopes isn’t the slightest bit true, is that all of this was intentional.

She frowns. Memcho thinks it’s because she’s tremendously jealous, Ruby thinks it’s because she’s doesn’t have that much luck with boys. But the truth is, she’s just worried for her friend.

She hopes her worries are just for naught.

----

Morning cuddles, pecks on the forehead and ice cream on a winter night. That is how you’d describe what being Aqua’s lover feels like.

Though Arima was highly opposed to him starting to live in the apartment with you all, you still convince him to stay longer than intended, wait for the rain to stop or the bustling streets to get a little less crowdy and oh- would you look at that! It’s midnight! Surely, you can’t go out right now, can you? oh well, sorry Kana. He has to stay for the night. Whoops.

Aqua cuddles with you like it’s the last time he’ll see you. his grip on you is comfortably tight, as if he’s pleading for you to not leave the bed before he wakes up. he’ll never admit this, of course. He’d only excuse it and just say he must’ve had a bad dream, or maybe he wasn’t really acting in a conscious matter. The blush on his face always debunk such excuses.

What you like most about such mornings, is how messy Aqua looks with his bed hair. Strands of blonde tosseled around and tangled in different knots, it takes all of your self-control to not run your hand through them and give him soft pecks to wake him up. you knew he had work today, he needs all the sleep he can get.

Aqua grumbles in his sleep, his voice gruffier than usual. He delves deeper into the blankets, finding solace in the crook of your neck. An action that made you hold back a shocked yelp.

If Aqua was the one laying beside you all the time, you wouldn’t ever try to avoid sleeping. With him, you feel fuzzy, his presence is one of a gentle spring warmth, calming and never harsh on your skin like summers’ warmth is. You feel safe around him, you feel at peace. He seems to understand you so well, you can’t help but just be yourself around him and not feel as if you need to be polite or responsible in a situation. You only wish he feels the same way around you.

With how peacefully he sleeps on your bed, how easily he banters with you or whines and complains about a task he must do, you can proudly (and reassuringly to yourself) say that he is. There’s an understanding between you two, a mutual love and respect for who you are. No one knows that Aqua secretly loves much older games like Sonic the Hedgehog, the very first one- or how he doesn’t understand certain memes and gen Z humor, but he’s too afraid to ask someone about it due to not wanting to be called a ‘boomer’. But you know that. You are the one he confides in about such things. Something about that makes your heart swell in pride.

Sure, not everything was completely perfect. There are times where Aqua’s actions seem more possessive than they are worried. These days, after months of no intel on the stalker situation, you slowly tried to socialize again and meet=up with some old friends. It was both for hanging out and for tutoring sessions, since you’ve been falling behind a little from your studies. When telling Aqua, something in his posture shifted, his eyebrows furrowed the slightest bit as he listened intently on what you have to say.

He interrogated you as if you were a suspect in a murder case. questions about where you were going, what time and what place, and strangest of all, who will be there and who has ha d a as crush on you. you didn’t understand why he was so serious about this, but you figured it was perhaps because he was still iffy about the stalker business, and since he doesn’t know these people he's unsure if he can trust them or not. However, you told him, you know them, and you’re certain none of them would be the stalker, just as you are certain he wasn’t the stalker, either. Therefore, there is no need to worry about that.

Aqua didn’t say anything back. once again, your gut begged you to rethink things over, but you’re so happy, you’re so content, there was no way you’d let this overthinking gimmick ruin your moments with Aqua, so you set them aside, like you have been for the past months.

Besides, it’s impossible for him to be the stalker. He was the one who saved you from the culprit. He was a witness rather than a suspect. A vicitm, even. If there’s anyone you should be suspicious of, Aqua is far from it.

You quickly grumble, hiding your face into Aqua’s shoulders. No no no- do not overthink this. It’s fine. Everything’s fine. You’re fine. You’re happy.

There’s no need to worry anymore.

You hear a loud serenades of bang and chatter happening outside of your door, then it hits you. today was your turn to make breakfast. If you don’t get up now, you’ll be facing an extremely hungry pair of stars and a harsh scolding from their kindhearted yet strong-faced leader. The temptation of staying in bed and given proper warmth and love by Aqua was immense, but you had a responsibility. With a sigh, you let your body bid goodbye to the fluffy bed, all while giving Aqua small little pecks on his face, a common action you both do when the other needs to leave.

“H-Oomph!”

You try to scooch up, to finally leave the bed and answer to the hungry cries of the idols, yet a pair of arms drags you down again.  Aqua brings you closer than ever, giving a peck on your forehead.

“Aqua,” your sleepy voice gives you a drawl. You try to clear your throat before you speak again. “ Ruby’s going to kill you and me if you don’t let me make pancakes.”

Aqua’s first response was to grumble. “she’s sixteen. She can handle making pancakes on her own.” You rolled your eyes, yet gave in and snuggled deeper into his embrace.

“but it’s my turn.” You still argued, even though the drowsiness was making your head slowly lull into a deep sleep. “ and you don’t like the way she makes it.”

Aqua’s face scrunches up. “what made you think I’m going to eat her cavity-filled monstrosity of a pancake?” he huffed. “ I’ll just make us breakfast. Five more minutes, ok?”

“but- it’s my turn. Don’t you think it’s a bit unfair that you have to do it?”

He gives you a glance. “do you wanna do it?”

“obviously not.”

He looks at you dumbfounded. “then why are you insisting on this?”

“because it’s unfair if I make you do it when it’s my turn.” You whined, the guilt and procrastinator sides of you now at war.

You hear Aqua chuckle, making you look up and meet his soft gaze. “I’m your boyfriend. It’s normal for me to make breakfast for you.”

Your eyes squint. “ stop trying to rizz me up, Hoshino. We’re already dating.” 

Aqua snorts, shifting a bit and poking your cheek. “I’m not ‘rizzing you up’” he repeats like an old man. As if he’s a grandfather desperately trying to fit in with the teens. “I’m just doing what I love.”

You tilt your head. “cooking?”

“no.” he snickered. “spending time with you.”

“oh my god. You’re doing it again. Stop it.” despite your words, your heart was hammering in your chest. “I’ve been your partner for two months, pretty boy. “

“why can’t you just accept that I love doing things for you?”

“because I want to do things for you too.”

“you being here with me is enough.”

“why must you sound exactly like the sappy fanfics they write about you?”

“Oh, so you read them?”

You fall silent. Aqua chortles a laugh, slowly sliding out of the bed.

“don’t worry, I’m actually quite  flattered.”

“shut upppp.” You groaned into the pillow. Now only wanting to rot and cease to exist. The embarrassment is unbearable, yet Aqua still gazes at you with adoration. He takes a breath, and soon his lovestruck faces turns into one of annoyance, the smell of syrup filled pancakes invading his nostrils.

“let’s go cook together then, before Ruby gives us all diabetes.”

---

“are you sure everything is fine?”

It was the hundredth time she was asking you this. The hundredth, in merely this week. If you had to count in the other occasions she’s done this, it’d be up to millions.

“Kana, listen-“ you stop your tracks, your school bag feeling heavy from all the piles of homework and worksheets given to you due to your constant absence from class in the past months. “ I appreciate your concern, I really do- but seriously, everything is going great with Aqua. “ you figured she might be the most frazzled from your relationship, since she was the one most concerned for you after the carnival fiasco. “ frankly, it never could’ve been better.”

Kana’s expression falters. Switching between you and your now healed wrist. She stays silent in the rest of your walk, but her stare is relentless. You try to ignore it, especially when you see Aqua in the distance, whom had to leave school early for work, and now was here with a bag of groceries to pick you both up. Ruby got a bad cold from the sudden shift in summer to fall weather, and Memcho was in home streaming a new game that just dropped. you see Aqua waving at you, so you hurry your steps so you could reach and tackle him into a hug, yet a hold on your wrist stops you, immediately giving you bitter flashbacks. Yet, the grip, is much softer, less violent than what you remember. Her hands are smoother, and her eyes are filled with much more concern. Aqua’s stare, on that bitter night, seemed more like bloodlust than anything. Seemed like he was holding back, like he was on the brink of a violent melt down. Kana’s was different. Much different. It made you stare at her with confused silence, an apprehension evident in your eyes.

“l-listen.” She looks away ashamed, tugging her hair back, an action she often does when she's under pressure. “ I-I know I’m the last person you’d like to hear this from…given my past crush on Aqua…but—“ you wanted to refute that, to assure her that you hold no grudge against her over such a thing- but your mouth stayed closed, memory lane holding you in a vice grip. 

“something off. Something’s wrong. Aqua…he’s not acting like himself these days.” Kana stressed. “ I mean- he looks normal yeah- but please, think about it. why on earth would take you to a crowded, loud place after you were almost kidnapped? What’d he do if you suddenly got lost? Or you disappeared? Isn’t it weird for him to pick such a place?” her eyes suddenly widened. “a-and think about what you told me! about the stalker being a part of the staff, remember? I think you’re right, Y/n. you were absolutely right about that. And I think Aqua knows this too- but-“

-“you guys ok?”

Kana flinches, her face is by all means horrified, as is she’s seen a ghost. She quickly let’s go of your hand, and her expression shifts from horror to dismissive and bossy, a casual look for Aqua to receive from her.

Despite her face screaming horror merely a few moments ago, her voice is as relaxed as ever. “ Hm? What, can’t let us have a girl talk now?” she grumbles, starting to walk away and giving a light punch on Aqua’s shoulder. “ learn to be patient, Hoshino!”

Aqua mumbles an apology, even if it was obvious from his tone that he wasn’t much sincere about it. he doesn’t follow her, and you don’t either, too caught up with a doubtful heart and a mess of a mind. The whole atmosphere shifted too quicky- far too quickly for your mind to process and for your heart to feel. It’s like you’ve blinked once, a storm appeared and then when you blinked twice, it was the same sunny and rogue fall. 

“hey, you ok?” Aqua’s voice barely registers in your head. Concerned, he places a hand on your shoulder, one which you flinch at, and he quickly disregards it. his slightly hurt stare breaks your heart.

“ah, sorry— Kana uh…she…” your bag suddenly felt heavy. Aqua’s blue eyes didn’t shine with the brilliance you’ve once perceived, rather, it seemed to be prying, looking deep inside your soul for any sort of suspicious activity. You gulped. “ um- she just told me some jerk in my class secretly liked me.” you try to laugh it off, try to act like it’s the truth. But you’ve never been the best actor, Aqua knows that very well.

“oh? alright then.” His voice reeks of layers. The relaxed tone is but a cover-up for something else entirely. Something you’re completely unsure of, and now, with the horrifying small dots clicking together one by one, something you’re completely and utterly horrified of.

‘but it can’t be true.’ Your heart reasoned. ‘at least, not entirely true. He may have have just wanted what’s best for you mentally. And he knew a sociable place was best!! Yeah…yeah. He knew. He was careful. He…he should’ve been careful. He is careful. He wouldn’t have taken you there in the first place if he wasn't certain nothing would happen.’ You listened, you listened wholeheartedly and calmed your own queries and worries. You look at Aqua apologetically, grabbing his hand and urging him to forget it and walk back home.

“you sure she hasn’t said anything…weird?”

Aqua’s hand squeezes yours, he’s waiting for reassurance.

“ No, she’s just worried for me, that’s all.” you squeezed back.

For whatever reason, the grip Aqua had on your hand felt a bit more tight after those words.

-----

Darkly lit room has become your norm for the night. Your eyes were too bothered by the laptop’s luminescent light to handle the lamps’ and your hands were too fixated on clicking away to even bother thinking about flipping a light switch.

The tune in your ears have become a bit repetitive, the song was almost near finish. Only a few more things, a few more polish, and you were set to publish. However, something was holding you back.

Art, in any form it is, always, in whatever ways, hurts the artist. By all means, any form of art is a fucking pain to perfect. Normal people often believe that the talent of ‘creation’ is gifted to people, handed on a silver platter with no hard-work whatsoever. Just like intelligence. Unfortunately or not, that is not the case. Even Da Vinci had his bad art days, even he started out bad, barely able to sketch anything but a stick figure. Art is like a sport. You must train it, understand it and fathom it to get to where you want to be. You must trip and fall and bleed till you ache, you must lose a few tournaments, all to reach the goal of satisfaction, the goal of improvement. One must truly love art if they want to continue it. it is why so many people find their skills being called ‘natural talent’ so offensive. There is no such thing as natural talent. There is only love in what one does, and that love is often mistaken for the latter.

There is only one way up in art. Practice. Which, upon first view, it seems quite easy, however, it’s actually, quite frankly, fucking painful.

Which is what leads you to your current dilemma. The common ‘is this good enough? Am I good enough? Is my entire being even worthy of life?’ thought coursing through your very bones and blood like a marching band. You hate what you’re listening to, but you cannot bring yourself to delete. You’ve spent too much on this, your mind will start sobbing and breaking apart if you think of re-editing even one more line in the second verse. You’re losing your entire mind, and you’re questioning your very skills. Skills that you find to be utter useless flammable garbage.  You’d say you want to die, but with what you’re creating, you’re certain that you’re not even worthy of such a sweet release—

“you look like a psychopath.”  Aqua quickly takes off your headphones, leaving you to give him an offended look- as if he just insulted your pet and called them ugly. He does not falter. He looks at you with stern. “ if you don’t take a break, I'd have to call the ambulance. C’mon now, get up. “ your tired hands fly up to him for a fight, even if your body is as slow as a zombie’s.”No- Y/n stop trying to steal the headphone from me-“ he lifts his arms up as high as he can, earning a few rambles of ‘no’ from you. “trust me, you need one.”

“no, I need a good song.” Was all your energy-drink fueled mouth could spring out. “ I promised myself to not get up from this seat until I get this over with!”

“you’ve been sitting here for ten hours.”

“just one more.” You plead. “one more hour- hell even just thirty minutes and I promise I’ll go to bed.” You quickly look at yourself in the mirror and scowl. “and take a shower.”

Aqua’s expression reeks of worry, with a tinge bit of disappointment. He glances at the screen, his eyebrows even scrunching up more now. “this looks finished. Why on earth would you need one more hour?”

“how would you know it’s finished?” your tired, exhausted and sleep-needed voice made you sound annoyed, but it was a sincere question, one more laid around curiosity than malice.

“I’ve seen you work before. This format looks similar to your other finished products.” He speaks as if that was normal. As if he didn’t confess to the strangest action.

“hold on—“ even in your tired state, your mind caught on quick. “you watch me while I work?”

“yeah?” he questions, as if you’re the weird one for bringing that up. “always thought you looked cute focused. I couldn’t helped but glance at what you’re working on.”

You couldn’t help the giddiness you felt, the mental pressure to keep up a cool image was long gone with your doziness. Though- it’s never even there to begin with when you’re with Aqua- you feel awfully comfortable with him these days. To the point where you’re fine showing him the awful work state you’re in- with little to nothing attractive about you at the moment.

“god Aqua, you’re weird.” You laughed. “but..it’s a sweet kind of weird- still weird- but you’re the one doing it- so.. it’s..kind of like- since I like you so much, I find it lovely?” you didn’t even know what you were talking about anymore. Exhaustion was getting the best of you for sure. “ like- it’s also so reassuring- I mean-“ god, you really need sleep. Your bed is beckoning you to slumber. “ you always seem so normal and perfect. It’s nice to know even you have some weird qualities.”

“observing the one’s you love is weird?” was of course his question. oh god, you love him so much.

“I mean— in some people’s book, yeah. It’s weird.”

Aqua’s lips falter a bit. “..do you find it weird?”

Your mind, too sleep rendered to process the tonal shift, answers truthfully. “well— I guess for me it depends on the person— like- if it’s some stranger I’d be freaked out. but..it’s you. so, I find it really sweet,actually.”

Aqua’s posture relaxes, as if a giant weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He sighs, one of relief or drowsiness? You’re not sure. All you know is that he keeps gazing at you so softly, you wonder how lucky you’ve gotten at landing such a handsome blondie as your lover. You- the composer who reeks of hamburgers and syrup induced caffeine-

Aqua suddenly laughs. “You’re talking aloud, Y/n.” shit. Well, this is embarrassing. With a groan of shame, you hide your face and cringe, all while Aqua tries to convince you to get up for bed.

You’re unsure of how, your brain’s comprehension of the conversation all muddled, but you get coerced into falling asleep, Aqua’s smooth voice becoming your siren.

----

A café runs through chitter and chatter, the often small town with no crowds have become awfully occupied these past few days, each and every one of the people are classmates you’[ve know for years  or people you’ve met in parties and hallways- all huddled up together in a small café known for serving tired and half-dead university students.  

After years of ripping your hair out, biting your teeth and hating every second of the subject you had to study, you and your fellow classmates have finally graduate Tokyo Medical School and Dental University- a thing your parents constantly mention in every party they're in- speaking about how it’s always been your dream- even though it wasn’t- actually, it was their dream for you, and you, ever desperate to seek their love and approval, did everything in your power to appease them, all for them to boast about amongst your aunts.

You drink your tea-bag cheap tea, afraid of spending money with the tight budget you’re on. moreover, you never really liked the food quality served here anyway. The cake always seemed a bit too dry, and their milkshakes were always made with no quantity control- each serving becoming either too sweet or too solid to be called a milkshake.

In your haze of thoughts, your fingers tap on the table, your mind hazing to find a nice rhythm to go with the café’s ambiance, a certain song intro for all the slice of life stories that were made here. the song in your mind quickly vanishes with your friends, far away in the other side of the café start calling you to join them for a game of charades- with nothing better to do- and also- out of your own instincts in what you assume is a dream sequence completely out of your control- to real to be a dream- one could say- but it was also too far away from your own reality to be called a memory in your life- you get up from your seat, plastic cup still in hand as you make your way to the group, only to stumble upon a block on your road and fall head-first into the chest of an unknown man and his red sweater- a sweater of which, is now stained by your tea.

“oh shit shit! Shit I’m so sorry! Wait here- I’ll help you dry it-” you quickly grab tissues from the cashier counter and quickly trying to damage control the already ruined sweater, guilt now eating you up from the inside out. “god I’m so sorry- the whole sweater is ruined now-“

“it’s fine-“ the man, whom now you look up to see, is none other than Gorou Amamiya, the top student in your class known for his quiet attitude. “ I hated this sweater anyway.”

You look at him with a rose brow. “ don’t you wear this everyday?”

He gazes away. “it was getting old, wanted to get a new one for a while now.”

“oh- then let me buy one for you! it’s the least I can do-“ your eyes widen up for a moment ands you take off your coat, giving it to a  very confused Gorou. “Take this with you too, I heard it’s going to rain soon. This should keep you warm.”

“…thank you.” his voice was toned down, genuine sincerity within it. “ but you really don’t have to. I don’t mind rain.”

“and let the genius in our campus get a cold?” you scoffed. “there’s no way I’m letting that happen.”

“..I’m not a genius.” He looks away embarrassed. “I’m just good at studying.”

“if you were just good at studying, then you wouldn’t have been the top student in our class!” you give him a playful punch in the shoulder. “ stop selling yourself so short, Doctor Amayima.”

He gives an embarrassed scoff, hand going up to his face to hide his bashful smile. “please, just call me Gorou. “

----

You wake up to sniffles in the morning.

It’s small at first, barely even a whisper. Your mind easily disregarded them as a shifting of a bedsheet or shuffle of your kaito plushie. Then, it started getting slightly bit louder. Still, your  hazy sleepy brain tried to think nothing of it, but then- it happened- the hiccup- the very same one of that unforgettable night rung through your ears, making your heartbeat peak with panic and your body jolt awake from no alarm beside it.

Your eyes shift in the night, cracks of dawn can barely be seen- but the specks of white on your windowsill assure you that it’s almost morning- and through all the empty cans and bundles of wires sits a sobbing Aqua, a headphone, your headphone, placed on his ears with the light of your laptop shining on them. His eyes, widened up and seeming hurt, were glued to the screen, unwavering in their stare.  His brows kept furrowing from one position to another- either shocked or hurt. He looked just like the night you always fear to remember- although there is a stark difference. He looks much softer, his gaze more of a broken boy’s than a protective lover’s. the sligh horrified harshness he had in his eyes were gone here, leaving a gaze full of nostalgia and painful memories in it’s wake.

You shift out of the bed- now slowly awaking your conscious and clearing your throat- slowly trudging towards your boyfriend. You reach out for his shoulder, as gently as you ever could, but he quickly shook franticly and swiftly turned around to meet your gaze, horrified by being caught. “you scared me-“ he quickly muttered. Still overwhelmed, he slowly takes off his headphones and tries to rub the waterworks out of his eyes. He wouldn’t look at you, perhaps still afraid of you seeing him in such vulnerable states, so in a moment of confidence, you takes his hands away from his face and cup his cheek, drying his tears.

“you ok?” was your first question. he took some time analyzing your face before answering.

“…I’m fine.”

“then why were you crying?”

The question could’ve been a harsh slap  to the back with how he reacted. It was a question he wasn’t content answering, it seemed. You grew concerned and self-conscious. “you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to—“

“your song,” he started, mind drifted somewhere else. “ it…well..” often, you wouldn’t see Aqua so lost in what to say. If he had nothing of noteworthy to speak of, he wouldn’t speak at all. but, you’re now well aqquinted with seeing Aqua act differently with you then how he does in the public eye. you wouldn’t be surprised if he picked up this habit from you, even. You wait for his reply as he collects his thoughts and takes a deep breath. “ ..it feels..nostalgic. have you..thought of somewhere-or something specific when writing this song?”

You’re taken aback, considering the question for a few seconds of hums before answering with a shrug. “I don’t know.” you huffed. “ honestly, most of my personal songs are just- thoughts and feelings that have been stuck in my head in a long time.” You give him a smile, your tone getting the slightest bit chipper as you try to ease the mood and distract him from whatever bad thought he has. “often, I get these tunes after a good night’s sleep. It’s like they come to me in dreams. “

To that, Aqua’s prolonged avoidance of eye-contact suddenly breaks. “dreams?” he repeated more to himself than you. “what kind, exactly?”

“Pervert.”

“Wait no I-“ his posture  slouched as you snorted. “ you know I didn’t mean it like that.”

“you brought this on to yourself!” you jokingly reasoned. “ and for your information- no. it was not a spicy dream.”

“Spicy? You call wet dreams spicy?”

You fall embarrassed. “Well- saying spicy makes it funnier!” you reasoned.

“ you’re embarrassed of saying wet dreams, aren’t you?”

“No.”

“then say it.”

“….”

This time, it was Aqua’s turn to snicker. To be amused thoroughly and hopefully enough- forget about his breakdown for a moment and calm his worries.

“how do you always leave me so tongue tied?” with crossed arms, you tried to change the subject.

“you’re easy to provoke, you always feel embarrassed over the littlest things.”

“not true.”

He gives you a doubtful stare, you scoff and falter.

“okay, maybe it’s slightly true. But you’re overexaggerating it.”

“you’re too insecure for your own good.” He speaks like a disappointed mentor, giving a glance at the monitor before looking back at you again.

“ well, the insecurity is what helps me succeed.”

He frowned, a posture of his shifting from the few moments of relaxation to one of slight frustration. “ or perhaps, it’s what’s holding you back all the time.”

“okay, first of all, ouch.” You sit down on the bed, your mind coming to the conclusion that there’ll most likely be no sleep for you tonight. “second, if I’m not satisfied with a song then what’s the point of releasing it? if I don’t like it, then obviously my fans won’t either.”

He stays quiet for a moment, sitting in different positions on the computer chair, as if there’s a prick behind his back not letting him lean in and relax. His eyes were deep in inquisitive thought as he speaks once more. “ if it were any other song, I’d agree with you,” he looks right back at you now, with eyes shining with such vibrant sincerity you held back a shocked hum. “but this song? My god, Y/n, you need to post this now.”

“y-you sure? I mean- I think it needs a bit more polish-“

“no, no. don’t add anything else to it, right now, as it is, it’s one of the most heartfelt and genuine songs I’ve ever heard.” He looks back at the monitor, and in his mind, he echoes the song in his head, the little vocaloid voice singing the lyrics and tugging at his heartstrings. “ when I hear it…I feel awfully nostalgic. I feel at home. It’s like you wrote this from the heart.” He looks back at you so softly, you could feel your heart race from his gentle, ever so small smile. “this is the best song I’ve ever heard, love.”

“…even better than Ai’s star-fell sweetheart solo you always listen to?”

His eyes glow in sharp determination. “even better than her entire album.”

-------

To you, Aqua Hoshino was often like an old man- he acts as if he’s in his forties. He doesn’t partake in new video games, yet he knows an awful lot about the classics. He knows an insane amount of golden era 90s to 2000s singers, his whole playlist is either just the great idol Ai’s song or such songs in said categories, there is no in-between. He insists on putting  wooden cup trays on the table, even if barely anyone uses them anymore- and to you, most amusing of all, he barely understands gen Z humor, the very generation he’s apart of. Often, you tell him that he may be young, but he has an old soul. He never really replies to that joke, but he doesn’t seem to be annoyed by it either. It was more of a ‘deep in thought’, one could say. Aqua looked like a charming prince to the media, a quiet man to his friends, and to you, he was a dork who takes his actions a bit too seriously, at time, but he had a heart of gold. All he wants is for his loved ones to live on happily, and all he does is to achieve that very goal. Even in acting, though he never tells you his true reasoning for sticking to the art, you assume he’s doing it just so B-Komachi can get more eyes on them. After all, the actor brother and idol sister dynamic is something  fans would always spam about on the internet constantly. You found too many sibling having matching Hoshino profiles, too many to count. Aqua's kindness knows no bounds, and that’s one of the many things you love about him.

Which, is why the very situation you’re observing has got you stuck in a web of thoughts, each more confused than the other.

While excitingly watching your song slowly blow up to fame from one view to the next, your enjoyment quickly dies down when you see how tense Kana seems, staring at  Aqua with a shaky figure. Wasn’t she with Ruby visiting the Hoshino household just now? They must’ve come back when you were distracted with your laptop- you didn’t even hear the door close. But now, with your mind out of the excitement, you could hear Ruby speak and ramble on with Memcho about the  Ai-exclusive bunny plushies she’s brought back from her house, and how it’s shocking how long this whole apartment and stalker issue is going.

However, their conversation was of no matter to you right now. Your current concern was how horrified Kana kept looking at Aqua. she's now batting an eye towards you- not even a single glance- it’s as if she’s in a trance, and she hasn’t realized you were in the room as well.

Your boyfriend didn’t seem to notice the burning stare, too caught up in reading ‘The Picture of Dorian Grey’ to even become aware of Ruby and Kana’s arrival, or so you thought.

“love?” Aqua calls out to you, quickly placing the book on his lap. “ can you tell Ruby that we’re not ordering from that bakery tonight? I’d rather not have her pout and fight me about it. she listens to you easily.”  His head quickly shifts to see Kana, as if he's just been aware of her presence. Yet, Kana seems more furious than before. “ oh! Kana, I thought you were with the others. “ he slightly tilts his head in curious confusion. “why are you so quiet? It’s unlike you.”

The aura of the room has shifted to one of hostility, and you found yourself involuntarily gulping. “Kana…” you grew concerned. “you ok? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Kana’s eyes get a flash of sympathy- right before it cutting back to her neutral face and determined smile. “I’m fine, you go convince Ruby, or else she’ll already call and order that expensive shortcake. “

You felt bamboozled, like an actor who forgot their lines at  a play. They were both hiding something from you, it was evident from their five star actor smiles. You felt suspicion grow within you, and in a fit of doubt and worry, you say ‘one second’ before typing on your computer. For them, they’re assuming that you’ve just closed your google tabs on the view count for your new video, however, you opened the recorder and let your computer sit turned on and it’s screen away from their view as you got up and left in a hurry.

You felt a prickling, sick bundle of needles crawl up your arms and back. worry and fear, all mixed into one bag of confusion. Something was going on, you’re unsure what it is, but you’ll maybe, with the recording you’ll have, you’ll finally understand why Kana seems much more hostile to Aqua than before, and why Aqua seemingly ignores her at every turn.

You only hope the batteries in your laptop doesn’t die too soon.

----

“it’s with a heavy heart that I’m announcing my departure with B-Komachi. I have decided to  focus more on my acting career, but I’ll never forget all the love and support and lovely memories I made while being on this team. I hope you keep on supporting me!”

Crowds cheer and the backstage staff whisper to each other in surprise. All while you are left alone with your cheap tea-bag tea in a cup, looking at the screens and seeing Kana’s kind face as she bows down in respect to the fans. Her departure with the team is not surprising, she spoke about it months ago before the stalker situation even erupted. However, the timing felt odd to you. it’s been weeks since her private talk with Aqua, one which disastrously enough, your laptop apparantly didn’t record it at all. but you swore you turned the recorder on- you even double checked to see the red button blaring before leaving the living room. nevertheless, whatever it was, it was the breaking point for Kana, and right after it, in the night she told everyone at dinner that she’ll be renouncing her role in the team at their next concert.

Something in your gut churned that night, your mind kept questioning every word that came out of her mouth, even Aqua’s support to her seemed somewhat off. Something was wrong, something has happened, and when in that night, you’ve privately asked Aqua what was their talk about, he pat your head and told you that there’s nothing to worry about. She was merely speaking about a new role coming up, and she has wanted him to partake in that series with her.

Liar.

Your tea was getting cold, and the bitter peach-scented taste you’ve often enjoyed tastes like absolute garbage now. It’s as if you’re missing an important clue- a key point in all this mess, a key that is buried deep within your psyche with all the other bad memories your mind never wishes to revisit.

“you ok there?” Aqua’s voice startled you.

“ how long were you standing there?” you joked, now leaving the cold tea on the table.

“not long, I was talking but you didn’t seem to be listening.”

“oh, sorry…I was just thinking.”

“about what?”

“nothing much.” You lied.  “ I’m just really going to miss Kana.”

“We all will. “ he puts his hand on your shoulder. “ but this is best for her. She never liked Idol work that much anyway.”

“…I guess you’re right.” you didn’t continue further, leaving an awkward tension to engulf the room.

“..are you still mad about my talk with Kana?” Aqua’s face, though still in neutral form, has it’s frown deepen a bit. “I told you, there’s nothing to worry about. We just talked about an upcoming show.” He gives you a conflicted stare. “would I ever lie to you?”

“..no.” you think so, at least. Or rather- you hoped so. You held his hand and gave it a squeeze of reassurance. “don’t worry, I trust you. I’m just sad about her leaving, honest.” Your heart feels stabbed, your conscious berates you for lying to him like this. yet you remain quiet as you squeeze his hand in reassurance.

You’re too far into your thoughts to see something in his eyes shift- the often light star pupil of his becoming slightly grey for one split second.

“…right.”

------

“you sure you don’t need me to look for it?” Ms.Saitou stops the car as she looks at you. “ you really don’t have to go all the way yourself, you can just give me a description of what to find.”

“no no there’s no need really- I’ve already bothered you enough with driving me here.” you take off your seatbelt, giving a glance at the house belonged to your boyfriend’s family. “I’m sure I’ll find it by myself, it’s not the first time I was here.” that’s a lie, you’ve actually never visited Aqua’s house, your meet up spots were always the apartment or the grocery store next to both of your schools.

“sweetie, I'm a little worried about you being there all alone. I can just look for it later when my meeting's over-“ oh boy, though Ms.Saitou’s kindness was endearing, you really need to go there alone so you can investigate properly. It’s time to pull up the shame card.

“u-uh..Ms.Saitou- the item in praticualr..is um..” you tried your best to look flustered, avoiding her gaze and fidgeting with your fingers, your posture lowering a bit as an act of embarrassment. “well…you know.”

Fortunately, it seemed to have worked, since her eyes widened and she cleared her throat, a sheepish smile on her face as she  looks away. “I see…well, carry on then. If you need someone to pick you up later I’m always one call away.”

“right, thank you.” you get out of the car, trudging your way to the house with an extra set of keys that were given to you. Yet before you open the door, a car honk stops you at your tracks. You look back at Saitou, whom still has the sheepish smile on her.

“and..uh, well I’m not sure if it’s been told to you yet, but please make sure to have protection at all times!”

You could feel the shame and cringe flood you- quickly giving her a strained smile and thanking her for the tip. Well, at least she cares. But, that is not your actual goal for coming here; nor did you and Aqua ever go that far anyway.

Your main goal is to find the truth- more specifically the truth on what Kana was speaking about. If your suspicions are true, Kana’s worry for you and the stalker and her conversation with Aqua are connected- and their conversation was nothing about the show- rather, perhaps, about an item or clue that Kana found within the Hoshino household while visiting it with Ruby. It’s just a hunch, but it’s a hunch you can’t possibly ignore anymore. Your doubts and worries have now overflown, to the point where you’re afraid it’ll  negatively affect your relationship with Aqua. and for what it’s worth, you’re sure your worries are for naught, and it’s just your overthinking and anxiety being a douchebag to you.

The house is untouched, almost spotless. The only thing showing any signs of people living here in the past months is the bottle of alcohol on the counter, and the few coats lasying on a couch here and there. it’s obvious that Saitou loves alone her, with Aqua even starting to live in the apartment in spending more of his time in your room rather than his.

You scan the place, looking through cupboards and drawers for any sing of something suspicious. Yet find nothing of that sort. With a sigh, you decide that it’s best to go into Aqua’s room first.

His room was clad in walls of blue, a poster of Ai Hoshino right atop of his wall, making you smile a bit at his fanboy heart. The room had only a few things, a closet, a desk with books and his bed, a blue circular carpet on the ground and of course, a window with blue satin curtains on it to fit the atmosphere. On his walls you could see some small little scribbles and drawings he and Ruby must've left when they were children, the books on his table were all sorts of acting ones, and on the shelf on top of his table there was a collection of tapes, all old classic movies he often ranted to you about when you were both pulling all-nighters with a walk to the park. You take a step in, though your morality fought with you about the breaking of trust and privacy and the consequences that’ll come with it , Kana’s horrified eyes couldn’t leave your mind, her shaky voice echoed through your head and you instinctively searched his closet for any kind of clues.

Yet, there was nothing.

You take a few steps back,

*clack*

You falter. You look down at your feet. You kick the ground.

*clack!*

You quickly slide the carpet away, and on the wooden ground, you see a plank that is ever-so-slightly off-color with the others. you take it out, and what you see leaves seeds of fear in you to brew. A black box, you take it out and see there’s a lock with a password on it. shit.

You first try Aqua’s birthday, nothing of note happens. Then, you try Ruby's. still nothing. You try his mother’s, that doesn’t do anything either. You try even his Idol’s date of birth and death, it still keeps itself locked. With a sigh, you think for a new answer, and quickly, a creepy thought comes up in your mind.

Slowly, you put your birthday in.

The lock opens..

Ooooook you’re not sure if you have to find this romantic or scary, perhaps both? Nonetheless, you open the box with a panic, and what you see is a collection of burner phones and notepads.

You first take out the notepads, opening them and having your heart drop at the sight of a schedule. Your schedule, from day in and day out. whom you’ve met, whom you’ve passed and even which café’s and shops you’ve visited. All dating back to the third day you've joined Strawberry productions, and most importantly, all in Aqua’s clean handwriting.

You can feel your stomach churning in horror,  a bundle of gasps and swears stuck down in your throat. You take a deep breath, even if it doesn’t do anything to calm your panicked heart. You open another notepad, seeing that it contains specific things about you, from your favorite color to favorite food, and even to what clothing stores you prefer buying clothes at. Holy shit, how did he even knew that one? You could’ve sworn you’ve never spoken about such things- even with B-Komachi. Unless he had an eye on your laptop screen on breaks, seeing which shopping websites you had open.

Your heart was breaking, piece by piece, little by little, with every more notepad you’ve opened and more information you’ve seen revolved around you, you can feel your perception of Aqua change. Aqua Hoshino, the man you love. The kind boy who puts on a façade of prince charming just so appease people, but is a dead-panned dork at heart, or maybe- that’s not who he is either. Perhaps he's been playing a game with you all this time as well. using you for his won means- maybe the same means on why he's still in acting. God, you fool. You utter fool. How could you think that a romantic kiss in the rain would fix anything, how could you even think that Aqua’s actions were even the slightest bit normal?

You take a look at the phones, and as you turn them on and put in your birthday as the password, you could only pray with shaky hands that they’re not what you assume they are. The phone turns on, only one contact is in the phone. It’s your number. Fuck.fuck fuck fuck fuck. In shock, with a  shaky hesitant thump, you click the messages. the image of you crying, the very image that has been sent to you lays within there. you scroll up, realizing through your new tears that he is the very same stalker who messaged you that night. He is the stalker who haunted your nightmares, the one who constantly made you feel on edge and that you were about to die. Aqua Hoshino, the one who saved you that very night, was also the one who put you in danger. You couldn’t help it, you throw the phone on the ground and started sobbing, your heart couldn't handle the pain and your mind was messing with you by replaying sweet memories, seeing them slowly rot and become sour. Everything he has done, everything you have lost, it was all apart of some sick plan, for a goal completely unknown to you.

Shit shit- you need to call the police, you need to tell someone about this- you need to-

A prickling, cold, familiar sensation runs through you. eyes were watching you. you quickly turn around. But it’s too late, Aqua, with eyes as cold as ice, holds a heavy metal pan and looks at you with disappointment. As if he found you with a broken vase.

“this will be quick, love.”

Before you could run away, your quickly grabbed and hit in the head. A pang searing through you as you fall down, vision slowly getting more blurry by the second, a sympathetic Aqua soothing your head as your pain worsens and you fall to sleep.

---

Gorou Amayima was a simple man, with a simple dream.

Though, most of his dreams were fabricated and influenced by his want of approval from his guardians, he knows that deep down, he too wants to find true love and settle down with a family. After all, with the kind of grades and money he now possesses, he’s certain that he can live a simple , lovely life in a family of four, maybe even five if you include the pets. Yet, there was always one problems. There was no one out there that he loved so much, and he was sure there was no one out there that loved a normal guy like him. how could one have a ,loving family or a peaceful life for that matter, without love in there to begin with? Yes, Gorou Amayima’s dreams were nothing but impossible, so he quickly discarded such fantasies and focused on his studies instead.

That is, until he met you.

One accident with a sweater led to a friendship through summer- and that friendship has led to him realizing how much you both have in common, and how to him, you were endearing, you were interesting, you were lovable.

Sure, you had your faults just like anyone else did- yet, those faults of yours only made you more beautiful to his eyes, more real. He couldn’t help but fall for you, couldn’t help but feel energized whenever you were around. Your jokes, your laugh and even your frowns and pouts, each of them were ingrained in his mind and he would find himself doodling your face in his notebook more times than one.

You were always there for him, always hyped him up and were his cheerleader when he felt the most insecure. And when you finally started dating, the support never stopped. You moved in with him in Miyazaki, even if you could’ve easily found a good job in somewhere more busy like Tokyo. Everything was perfect, and for once- after years of ignoring his own needs and dreams- he genuinely considered marrying you, and then having a family with you. perhaps, you could even adopt a few kids who were abandoned in the hospital, giving them the love they deserve. Maybe even, you could finally get into your love for music, you could take piano classes from the old man in the neighborhood. Everything would go smoothly, everything felt right. for once, Gorou felt satisfied with his dull life.

However, like all good things, this one had to come to an end as well.

The biker gang was always a problem around here, he’s heard from past rumours and whispers that they often come to this place to lay low, and the police force around here isn’t strong enough to take them down. He knew they were big trouble, and he’s always warned you to not go outside without him or someone else alongside you, not until they leave. But oh, you were persistent. You kept persisting that your small trip to the shop in a busier city a few miles away won’t take long-and that nothing would happen to you, why would they even care about you?

You convinced him, he couldn’t say no to your pout, he let you go that day, and soon  enough, as the rain fell and police lights blared the red and blue lights all over the road scene, a murder, a robbery-gone-wrong, with the gang member in question fleeing with all the money that was left in your purse- which was not much to begin with- since you spent most of it on a red sweater, a sweater with the very same color and shape as the one he’s met you the first day with. And bittersweetly enough, a handwritten note by you on that sweater, congratulating the anniversary of the day you met, the anniversary of your graduation. The world has become bleak once more, the dreams he had crushed and the love of his life gone because he failed to protect them, he failed to save you from this fate.

He thought that was the end of it, that your relationship was perhaps meant to end in a bitter tragedy.

Yet, it seems like gods above have given him a second chance, a second life to mend things with you.

A simple scroll around youtube, a simple search for some nice songs and inspirations for his role has led to him to hear a familiar tune- one you’d always hum while cooking- he froze for a moment, checking the playlist’s sources and finding your channel, a new artist on youtube making songs with vocaloids- he first thought nothing of it. but curiosity got the better of him. you were quite social on your platforms, though the information on your personal life was scattered- he knew from your business email you live somewhere near the same state he does- and soon enough, he got into work. He was unsure of why he was so desperate to see you, an artist he knows nothing about, yet their tunes awfully familiar. but anytime he thought of the songs, he could only see vivid memories of certain days with his past lover, the one that didn’t deserve the tragedy that has struck them.

His heart almost stopped when he first saw you

It was at first appalling- horrifying even, with no change in your appearance whatsoever- merely younger and in the same age as him as Aqua Hoshino- walking down the streets up to Strawberry Productions, a curious and nervous gleam in your eyes, the same gleam you had when you first met in that small café. It’s you, it’s really you. you have been reborn again, just like he was. but from what he realized during the interview, it seems like unlike Ruby and him, you don’t remember a single thing about your past. It’s no matter, because the truth was no obvious to him. the very reason of his rebirth and his chance in this world- was all so you two could have the life you’ve both always wanted, the life you've always deserved, unshackled by the expectations of legal guardians and others, able to do what you love, and be away from the dangers of the world. He just had to make sure that no harm ever comes to you, that in this life, you will live alongside him, and you’d grew old together. He'd do anything to keep you safe this time, and no amount of pouting or pleads from you could ever stop him from such a goal.

He wont let you die this time.

---

Cold. Thirsty. Hungry.

Those are your first upon waking up. your mind is in a complete haze, you feel like you’re in a crazy dream. Your body isn’t responding to you, every nerve slowly waking up one by one, yet not quick enough. Your vision comes back, and you find yourself in an abandoned hospital, one awfully familiar, yet you can’t pinpoint where you’ve seen it before. A tuft of blonde hair makes your body shake in fear.

“stay away from me!” you quickly scream, legs scrambling to crawl away, yet you find your hands tied behind your back, chained to a metal poll in on the wall. Aqua hisses at the shout, looking at you in a scolding manner.

“there’s no need to scream, I’m not going to hurt you.”

“bullshit!” you retort.  “you’ve been lying to me all this time! You’re just fucking using me for some crazy scheme that involves your acting, aren’t you?”

Aqua’s eyes widened, in a horrifying manner that leaves his star pupil pitch black and his firsts clenched. He looks art you with gritted teeth, furrowed brows indicating maddening disbelief. “ Y/n,” he says your name in such a passionate manner, you could feel bitterness form in your tongue. “ surely, you’re not that dense. You’re smarter than this,” his expression shifts from shocked to hurt. “ you know me better than this. you know I’d never do such a thing. Not to you.”

His voice his shaky. He’s genuinely hurt by your words. You could only look at him in disbelief. “ I love you. I did this all for you. you wouldn’t mind me keeping an eye on you if it meant just wanting to know you more, would you?”

“Aqua, you weren’t ‘keeping an eye’ on me. you were stalking me.”

“but it brought us closer, hasn’t it?” he gives a loving smile, a fond and real one, as if he believe his own delusional words. “without that situation, you and I wouldn’t have gotten so close. You wouldn’t have opened up to me so easily.”

“so that’s it? you fucking stalked me and made me think I was going to get kidnapped just so I’d talk to you more?”

He’s quiet, only giving you a knowing look. The gears in your head turn and your heart drops.

“oh god…you did it because you wanted me to fall for you?”

“it worked, hadn’t it?”

“oh my god.” You cried. You banged your head to the wall. the dread you were feeling, all the lovely moments in your head flashing in your mind, all of them were leaving you to despair. “oh my fucking god- Aqua. this is insane. You’re being insane!”

“doll, do you really think you’d fall for me in normal circumstances?” he crouches down, palming your cheek and caressing it. the touch feels horrible on your skin, yet as you try to steer it away, he grabs your chin and makes you look at him. “ I know you. and I knew you’d be too introverted to ever fall or speak to me that quickly. You’re mindful of who to trust. It’s what's so endearing about you, but it’s also the thing that was holding us back.” he gives a solemn look. “trust me, when we both would’ve realized the spark, it would’ve been far too late.” He goes back to caressing your cheek again, all while you remain horrified and silent at his rambles. “that’s why I needed to take matters into my own hands, I needed to make sure that you’re safe and sound, and the only way to do that was to make a fake disruption that would guarantee your safety if any real disruptions do happen.” He feels his finger becomes wet, and he now sees the little tears that were almost overflowing your eyes. He coos as he rubs them away, you’re too scared to move, afraid that his grip on your face may become harsher to the point of break the bones on your skull. “love, there’s no need to cry. I only did this because I love you. I never meant for it to scar you as much as it did.”

You couldn’t help but sob now, fully knowing that he’s too far back in his delusions to listen to any of your reasonings. “please Y/n, don’t cry. This situation is only temporary.”

“w-what do you mean?”

“Well, when I’ve finally convinced you that I’m just doing what’s best for you, then, I’ll let you free from the ropes. I just need to make sure that you won’t hurt me or tell anyone about this.”

“You’re fucking crazy, you know that?” you sobbed. “This is not normal, Aqua. none of this is. Please, you need to let me go- I-“

He quickly puts both hands on your head, steering you to look deep in his eyes, obviously hurt by your sobs and screams of plead. “Don’t you understand?! Y/n…” he shakes, as if he’s about to cry too, trying to calm down his breathing as he firmly holds your head in place, and you couldn’t help but feel scared, terrified of the boy in front of you. “…please, don’t make this harder than it should be. I’m only doing this for your own good. I'm doing this because I love you. I don’t know how much clearer do I need to make this.” his voice shakes, drops of tears now staining your clothes. “ please, don't hate me. don’t be afraid of me. just love me like you always did.” His voice breaks. “please—  just forget whatever you saw in my room- or at least know that I’ve done it all with the intention of keeping you safe when real danger does come.”

“w-what if this real danger is all in your head? Aqua- be reasonable-please. Who on earth would want to kill me of all people?” to that, something  in his eyes shift. He becomes delusional, his eyes look almost static, he's lost in thoughts you couldn’t comprehend.

“….you’d be surprised on the amount of cruel people out there.” he mumbled, none of his words making sense to you at the moment. “…I’ve seen you die once, I won’t let it happen again.”

“w-what in the world are you talking about? I-I’m alive right now, aren't I? see? I’m safe, a-and I'm okay- so you can let me go now. Aqua, please, let me go.”

He only seemed to be listening to half of your words, mumbling to himself a bit. he smiled at you, looked at you as if you were the most precious object he could’ve ever obtained.  “Yeah, Yeah. you’re safe now. Safe because I intervened rather than staying back. I wouldn’t make that mistake again, I swore to always protect you, I’m not planning to break that promise twice.”

“what?” arguing felt completely hopeless. You really didn’t know what to do anymore but sob. He coos at you once more, hugging you so tight as the rope around your wrists stung.

“don’t worry Y/n…I’ll set you free from the ropes when the time is right.” he holds you closer. “ when you finally give in.”

You gasped, crying out and trembling from fear, the very source of them hugging and whispering sweet nothings into your ear as if he isn’t a monster, as if he’s not the evil queen who tricked you into biting the apple. He is no prince charming, and he is no bad boy. He’s a psychopath whose delusional with the world around him, thinking that he is doing the right thing, when he's only making your worst nightmares come true. His kisses, now all over your face as an act of worship, feel cold and bitter, his hugs feel too tight and his words make you dread.

All this time, you thought you knew Aqua Hoshino to a T. but in fact, even around you, he was putting on a mask, and playing the part that would charm you most. Only to hit you in the head at curtain call and bring you to an unknown, abandoned hospital, to worship and love.

"I promise, you'll feel great here." his eyes quickly shine in slight amusement, he seemed to remember a key information. "oh, and don't worry about someone worrying about you being lost. I'm sure you know this by now, but the stalker case was never confirm to end, so with your disappearance, it'll be opened once more, and right before it, a certain gang member kept persisting to take you home, remember?"

you couldn't help but gasp, shock coursing through you as you can't do anything but cry and listen to his scheme as he holds you. holy shit, holy fuck. is as if he's planned every little thing from the very start- even Kana's suspicion towards him could've been planned for all you know. 

"let it all out of your system, darling." he smiled, dark and victorious, knowing fully well he's won a game you didn't even know the rules of, let alone know that you were playing it. " don't worry, you'll feel way better after a good rest. " his head tilts up to the dirty walls, humming deep in thought. "Say, you wouldn't mind some decoration around here, would you? maybe I'll even buy you some books if you behave well enough. any sort of technology is out of the question though. can't have you contacting someone from outside now, can I?"

your mind was too hazed out to respond, only wishing that this was all a cruel and wicked dream.

----

A/n:

hi hi!!!! if you're readers from my other fics, yes hello I'm alive lmao. if you're new here, welcome! I hope you all enjoyed my writing!!! honestly, this is my first yandere fic. so I'm not sure how well it'll be perceived. there are certainly better fics out there, but I hadn't seen much content on yandere Aqua before writing this, so I decided to experiment a bit! low and behold, this oneshot took much MUCH longer than expected. I genuinely thought this would be 7 to 13k words tops, yet here we are. this is officially the longest chapter and oneshot I've ever wrote. oh! and also for the ending, well, I wanted to leave it a bit open, so you can choose whatever ending you'd like for reader's story. I have a few suggestions myself, one with reader escaping, or Kana saving them and kicking Aqua's ass like the girlboss she is- or perhaps, if you're looking for a sad one, maybe reader becoming completely brainwashed and utterly convinced by Aqua's words, maybe even being convinced to replace Kana in the team. nevertheless, the ending is up to you, if you want you can share your endings with me in the comments! it's always a complete and utter joy for me to read them!! <3333

now if you'll excuse me, I'll go break my back on school projects all while continuing to write for my silly fics, have a great week everyone!!!!

#Oshi no Ko #aqua hoshino #aquamarine Hoshino x reader #aqumarine hoshino #aqua hoshino x reader #oshi no ko x reader #onk x reader #onk aqua x reader #yandere aqua hoshino x reader #yandere aqua x reader #yandere x reader #x reader #reader insert #fanfiction #yandere aquamarine hoshino x reader

[my-proof-is-you]

But God, at what cost?

Imagine: Dean helping you get through your cardio workout

A/N: Literally thought of this when I was at the gym trying to get through a workout. Pretended Dean was cheering me on…is that weird? Ha.

You were pretty sure almost no one hated running more than you.

You were a bigger person. You always had been. Plus sized, if you will. You were very strong, though. When you hunted, you held your own. 

You didn’t hate your body, either. You weren’t skinny like some of your friends were in high school. You knew none of them could do what you could on hunts, though.

Dean liked your curves, too. He always said he admired your strength and the man damn near worshipped your body in bed. 

But you knew your weakness: cardio. 

It wasn’t very often you had to run for your life. You, Sam and Dean made a great hunting team, so there was rarely a need to run away. 

When you did, though, you lagged behind. That meant that Dean lagged behind, too. He would never leave you to fend for yourself. You didn’t like it. You didn’t want him in danger any more than he wanted you to be.

So that was why you were trying to get better at running even though it was the bane of your existence. You’d been spending time in the bunker gym, using the treadmill Sam had bought for when the weather outside wasn’t conducive to his runs.

You didn’t really want Dean to know what you were doing. It was your own problem, and you wanted to fix it on your own. 

You’d run a few times on your own on the treadmill, and hated every second of it. It put you in a bad mood for the rest of the day, and your boyfriend had definitely noticed. 

You were once again trying to get a run in on the treadmill before the brothers got back from their supply run. Unfortunately, you didn’t time it right.

“Y-Y/N?” Dean asked, entering the gym. He had a shocked look on his face. 

“What?” You huffed, annoyed. It wasn’t his fault, but you couldn’t hide how much you hated what you were doing.

“What the hell are you doing?” he asked, coming to stand next to the treadmill with his arms crossed over his chest. 

You rolled your eyes. “Can’t a person run without getting asked a million questions?”

“A person, yes. You…no. Sweetheart, you hate running,” he said with a smile and a raised eyebrow. 

“Yeah—well— hate—putting you—in danger—more,” you said while panting.

Dean reached over, pulling the cord that stops the treadmill. 

“Hey!” You exclaimed, slowing to a walk before the belt stopped completely. 

“What are you talking about?” Dean asked. “What danger?”

“I’m slow, Dean,” you said, finally regaining your breath. “I know I am. And I don’t want to be the reason you stay behind and get killed by a monster!”

“First of all, that’s not going to happen. And B, you are one of the best hunters I know. I really think you’re underestimating yourself.”

You sighed. “Regardless, Dean, I could be better, and I want to be.”

Dean’s eyes narrowed as he studied your face. “This has nothing to do with looks, right? Cause, sweetheart, you know I think you’re perfect the way you are.”

You smiled, despite your exhaustion. “I know that, De. And I promise, it’s not about that. I know I’m hot,” you said with a wink. 

Dean bit his lip, sending a little thrill through to your core. 

“I just want to improve is all,” you said with a shrug. 

“Well, sweetheart, you know how I feel about running, too. I hate it maybe more than you do. But if this is something you want, I will help you,” Dean said, reaching out to squeeze your hand. 

You weren’t sure how he meant to help you, but going it alone wasn’t working. You’d take any help offered at this point.

He watched your face as you tried to understand what he’d do, and he gestured for you to step back on the treadmill. You turned it back on and began jogging. 

After a minute or so, you started to get out of breath and wanted desperately to stop. You looked at Dean, who nodded his head in the direction the treadmill was facing to tell you to keep looking forward. 

“You got this, sweetheart,” he began. He wasn’t yelling it, just speaking with conviction at his normal volume. 

“I’ve seen you go through literal Hell, Y/N. This is nothing. You are so strong.”

His words gave you some confidence. It was nice to hear, especially over the voice in your head that was telling you to quit. 

You went another ten minutes with Dean’s words of encouragement spurring you on before your legs started really aching.

“It—hurts—De—” you panted.

“Just a little more, Y/N/N. And when you’re done, I’m gonna take you to the shower…get you nice and clean,” he said, his voice turning sultry.

“Hm?” You asked, suddenly distracted from your pain. 

“That’s right, baby. Then I’m gonna massage all your sore muscles.”

You felt even more of a blush rising to your cheeks.

“And tomorrow, when you’re all rested, we’re gonna do some cardio together.”

“You—hate—running,” you said, breathless for more than one reason.

“I’m not talking about running, sweetheart.”

You hit your goal of two miles then, and nearly leapt off the treadmill before the belt even stopped. 

“Let’s hit the showers,” you said, grabbing his hand and pulling him toward the hall. 

Dean followed, chuckling. “Don’t have to tell me twice.”

Forevers:

@divadinag @lynne1993 @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​  @onethirstyunicorn @sammykb1994 @lilulo-12 @mellorine-paprika @tranquility-or-chaos @collette04 @hoboal87 @chevyharvelle @miraclesoflove @defenderrosetyler @babypink224221 @calaofnoldor @beatifuldisaster018 @coffeebooksandfandom @supernatural3002 @lainxcas @mylovelydame21 @mrsdeanfuckingwinchester @lovely-lynns-likes @ppeachygemss @screechingartisancashbailiff @metalfangirl @vicmc624 @polina-93 @hobby27 @sexyvixen7 @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @lyarr24 @amelia-song-pond @donnaintx @spnbaby-67 @traceyaudette @gh0stgurl @fiftyshadesgrl @tapedeck-hearts @lacilou @foxyjwls007 @stoneyggirl2 @kr804573 @cumuluscranium

Dean/Jensen:

@harleycao

#supernatural fanfiction #spn #supernatural #dean winchester #spn fanfic #supernatural imagine #angst #fluff #dean winchester/reader #dean x reader #dean winchester angst #dean angst #dean x you #dean winchester x you #dean winchester x reader #Sweet Dean #fluffy dean #plus size reader #plus size reader x dean #spn imagine #spn family #spn fandom #supernatural family #supernatural fandom #spn angst #fanfic #spnfandom #spnfamily #spn drabble #spn one shot

[dear-bunnyboo]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐍𝐄: 𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐋𝐄 || 𝐉𝐎𝐄 𝐁𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐖

important note: my face claim will be madison beer but you can imagine whoever you desire. also the songs mentioned are not all technically all madison’s i will be incorporating other songs from other artists.

all the pictures seen below are not mine, however they were edited by yours truly. credits to the owners.

joe is finally heerrreeee!! that’s all i can say. enjoy!

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Joe Burrow x Singer!Reader / Brief Ex!Jack Hughes x Singer!Reader

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: You are invited to the jungle.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: cursing, slight angst?, mentions of break up and cheating, drinking, new relationship?, joey b (he deserves a warning 🥵)

𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 || 𝐌𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 || 𝐌𝐢𝐬𝐜. 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 || 𝐍𝐇𝐋 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

A few more months had passed after releasing your two breakup songs about your ex boyfriend Jack.

It’s officially been six months after pictures of him cheating surfaced the internet and you were proud of the little achievements you have achieved regarding the scandal— you are finally sleeping better, you ran out of tears to cry for your ex, you removed everything that reminded you of Jack out of your life and that sadly meant you distanced yourself from your mutual friends who thankfully understood your situation.

You were also satisfied of your album that will be out soon— thankful for the positive responses you have gotten from Selfish and Reckless.

And out of all, you were ecstatic to be working again after your break.

You were on your private jet with your team and best friend on the way to Cincinnati.

You were invited by the NFL to perform the National Anthem at the AFC Wild Cards against the Bengals and the Raiders— and of course you said yes.

This was not only gonna be your first public appearance after the breakup but also your first performance as well— the very next day after the game you were gonna have a concert at the same stadium the game is held— this kicking off your American tour.

You were nudge on the shoulder by your best friend Y/BF/N, taking your eyes off the plane window you turned to look at her with furrowed eyebrows.

“Hey, you okay?” She asks checking up on you as you were lost in thought.

“I’m fine. Just the nerves that’s all.” You shrugged as you checked your phone to check the time, realizing that the plane was landing and you will be arriving soon.

Y/BF/N places her arm around you, “What is there to be nervous about, Y/N? You’ll kill it per usual.”

“It’s the National Anthem, Y/BF/N. I don’t want to mess it up and become the laughing stock of the entire planet— I don’t need to trend for a second time this year.” You muttered slightly confused as you watched your best friend pull out her sketchbook and pens out of her bag— she works for you as your head stylist and designs your outfits which is why she has drawing materials with her.

“First of all, you won’t mess up cause I believe in you. You’re Y/N motherfucking Y/L/N. Secondly, you are gonna trend and trend and trend even more this year cause you are gonna kill it per usual with this and your concert, your album, and all—”

You cut her off as you watched her write in big bold writing in her sketchbook.

“What are you doing?” You continued to stare at Y/BF/N who has her tongue poked out of her mouth in concentration.

“I’m writing the National Anthem lyrics. I will be standing right behind the camera so that you can see clearly–” she ranted before you threw a pillow at her laughing.

“Y/BF/N! Stop it!” You chuckled almost falling off your seat as you watch her still continuing her work.

“Is this how you spell perilous?” She deadpanned as she raises the sketchbook for you to see.

“Y/BF/N!?” You laughed clutching your stomach.

She continued to make you feel better even on the day of your performance…

Which is why as Y/BF/N fixes your outfit she talked to you as if she was a military enforcer.

“Seriously, Y/N— there is no one better to do this than you. It’s a short song, it will be over before you know it, and the offer still stands. Just say the word and I will be right there behind the camera with those cue cards.” She says as she rolled the lint roller all over your black outfit.

“I’ll pass but thank you.” You said to her gratefully before receiving a squeeze on the shoulder.

“You’ll do great.”

Taking a deep breath you waited for your cue— and just like that you were called onto the field.

You were greeted by the green turf that was laid out for the game. Thousands of fans from both teams yelling and cheering for their team, team colors of both orange and black and black and silver— the players on opposite sides of the field waiting for the game to start, the Raiders behind you while the Bengals were right up front.

You were directed to the center of the field where a small podium was placed for you to stand on, your mic on a mic stand sat on top of it— the American flag swaying behind you.

“Please rise for our National Anthem sung by Grammy winning artist, Ms. Y/N Y/L/N!”

Taking another deep breath, you closed your eyes eyes and let the music take over your body.

As you were performing there was no thoughts in your head but the song, you said every word right, hit every high note you wanted to hit, and as you opened your eyes back up for the last line—

“And the home of the brave.”

You heard the roars and cheers, whether they were for you or for the game that officially started, you couldn’t find yourself to care after making eye contact with number 9 who was dead center in front of you watching you narrowed eyes— you knew who he was, you knew how famous he is, and how good he is at what he does— the Bengals’ star player.

You shook your head, snapping yourself out of the trans before being directed back backstage.

You and your team watched the game backstage, you weren’t much of a football fan but you understood the game— your father was a college football coach and with that a huge football fan so you grew up watching such games.

The game ended with the Bengals winning 26-16 which you found yourself highly impressed by considering you have been watching number 9 the entire time— you mentally scolded yourself for doing so, not understanding the sudden attraction.

You didn’t need this right now.

Right after the game you were invited to the after party by the Bengals and your team and your best friend answered for you— reasoning with you that you haven’t left the house to enjoy in a while which was true, so you decided to let loose and accept only if Y/BF/N came with— which she did considering she was a bigger party person.

This is how you found yourself cradling a glass of wine by the bar next to Y/BF/N who was gushing over something you couldn’t hear— you were too busy thinking about your concert tomorrow.

“Y/N!” She yelled making you snap your head towards her.

“What?”

“Joe Burrow is staring at you!” She whisper-yelled staring at someone from the corner of her eye.

“What?” Is all you managed to say still confused at how that made any sense.

“What do you mean, what? Joe fucking Burrow is staring at you— bitch he’s been staring at you this entire time.” She continued to gush while you refused to remove your eyes off of her.

“Wait, wait! He’s coming this way! He’s coming this way! This is your shot— it’s the universe’s gift for you, Y/N! After that bitch Jack! Take it or leave it.” She spat out really fast before leaving your side and going to the dance floor.

You stood there aghast, trying to digest everything she just said and before you could even understand what was happening, a shadow loomed from the corner of your eye.

fuck

“Hey”

You shut eyes and released a deep breath— you hated talking to new people.

Turning your body towards the voice you were met with the Bengal’s star quarterback in all his glory— standing with his incredible stature he towered over you wearing a simple black skin tight shirt and denim pants accompanied by a black leather jacket accompanied by the Cartiers over his eyes. the drink in his hand looking miniature by the size of his hand.

“Hi” you breathe out mentally scolding yourself for sounding awkward from the get go as you looked up at him, taking notice how you reach his shoulders with heels on.

Chuckling, he brings his drink up to his lips taking a sip, before removing his sunglasses, “I’m Joe— I am a huge fan of your work and I just want to congratulate you on singing the National Anthem at the game, you were great.” he almost yells over the loud music and the people talking.

“Thank you for saying that, I appreciate it— and shouldn’t I be the one congratulating you? It is your win we are celebrating this very moment.” this making him wave you off not wanting to make a big deal out of it that it already was.

“Well, congratulations anyway. You played great.”

You played great who the fuck says that you mentally scolded yourself.

“Thanks but it seems like you win over the amount of things to celebrate.” he leans down towards my ear as the music rang louder, “Don’t you have a show tomorrow at Paycor Stadium?” Joe continues.

You nodded mulling over the fact that he knew about your concert.

“Yeah I do, my tour starts here. I’m really surprised you know that.” you smiled at him, your body language more relax than it was before when you entered the establishment.

Joe simply nodded his head at you before replying, “I told you I’m a fan— was not lying when I said that. I tried getting a ticket and everything, no shot though it sold out in minutes.” Joe had a childlike wonder to him whenever he talked which made you chuckle as you listened.

“I have an extra ticket if you want.” You shrugged before a lump formed in your throat, remembering who’s the ticket was originally for.

From that statement, Joe looked at you with wide eyes— his ocean blue eyes staring at you as if you grew two heads.

“Really? You’re playing with me.” He rubbed the back of his neck.

“I’m serious, why would I joke about that?” chugging the remaining contents of your drink.

“It just sounded like you were messing with me.” Joe shakes his head in disbelief.

“Well, think of it as a congratulation gift for winning.” you gave him a reason before continuing, “I love giving back to my fans.” you joked giggling.

“Oh, yeah— this can be my Make a Wish moment. Are there cameras?” he joined in before wildly looking around the club for the hidden cameras, earning a hearty laugh from you, Joe later on joining in as he watches you.

“Thank you. You really didn’t have to.” He says gratefully.

“You’re very welcome. I’m surprise the Joe Burrow didn’t get to pull some strings to get tickets.” you say teasingly, more comfortable than you were few minutes ago.

“Well, we are talking about the concert of the Y/N Y/L/N, I’m pretty sure even the Queen of England will have a hard time getting tickets.” Joe copied you slightly nudging you with his shoulders.

You gave the quarterback a playful glare making him chuckle at the look of your face— you found yourself genuinely enjoying your conversation and comfortable around him, not wanting it to end— and with that realization you were terrified, scolding yourself again for being cozy with another star athlete.

Why does this always happen to you? It never ends well— you pulled back from your thoughts, not wanting to over think— he could be genuinely just a fan or he could be in a happy relationship or he could be gay for all you know. You have no reason to overact— friends you can be friends with new people once in a while.

“Anyway, I don’t want to hog you any longer from your friend who has been watching us this entire time may I add.” Joe laughs nodding his head toward Y/BF/N who even under the dark could visibly be seen turn red for getting caught staring.

Turning away from Y/BF/N you gave Joe an apologetic look, “She’s just being weird cause I don’t normally talk to new people this long– being an introvert and all that.” you reassured him before pulling your phone out of your purse, holding it out in front of the both of you.

“Can I have your number please.”

“Woah, shouldn’t that be my line?” Joe joked before grabbing your phone out of your hand, adding his number to your contacts.

Rolling your eyes, you chuckled as you watched him patiently.

“I’ll send you the ticket tonight— 7:30 pm tomorrow but you probably already know that being my stalker and all.” you grinned up at Joe who was watching you with a glint in his eyes that you couldn’t or wouldn’t want to understand.

“Don’t underestimate me, I know your entire schedule.” Joe winks.

He winked.

Shaking your head, “I’ll see you tomorrow then– it was nice meeting you, Joe— and congrats again on winning.” finally bidding your goodbye.

“Thank you, it was nice meeting you as well and congrats to you too. I’ll see you.”

For the first time in months, you felt happy again— partying and making new friends, something you used to feel uncomfortable doing yet here you were with a wide smile on your face as you walked towards Y/BF/N, joining her on the dance floor.

It was Enchanting.

dividers: @cafekitsune

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: @jackkyhughes @h0e4fictionalme-n @queenmendes @rd14 @scoobydoopoo @estapa94 @karmasabitchybitch @literatureluster @toterry @fangirl-madz @atticusismybae @stargaryenx @haydee5010 @porter113

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-𝐛𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲ఌ

#joe burrow #joe burrow x oc #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow x you #joe burrow x y/n #cincinnati bengals #nfl imagine #nfl #nfl fan fic #nhl fanfiction #nhl imagine #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes #ex!jackhughes #ex!jackhughesxreader #theone🏹

[exchangestudentnova]

Revenge

Features: Yandere! Pro player Alexis Ness and Kaiser's crush! afab! Reader

Content: SFW, suggestive, manipulation (on Ness's part)

Term of endearment used for reader: cutie, darling, pretty thing

Ness knew that Kaiser liked you even before Kaiser himself could recognise his feelings for you.

If you ask anyone else, they'll say they aren't sure, after all Michael Kaiser does not wear his heart on his sleeve.

But it's different for Ness

Being Kaiser's support as a midfielder and his loyal friend made Ness very good at judging Kaiser's emotion. And the one Kaiser felt for you was love.

Even his action spoke of such. Purposefully making eye contact with you from across the room, letting you sit next to him, long conversation that never seem to end. Even the small touches here and there did not escape his eyes.

Well, it's not like there was any bad blood between Kaiser and Ness. It's just that Ness can't bring himself to forget the pain and sorrow brought by Kaiser's words as he casually abandons him to go join another team. How he seems to forgot how hard Ness worked to let him be the star of the show. Now playing for different teams, they only have light conversations during events that invite all the German football clubs.

In events where you, a famous event organiser, were there.

"Hm? How is it that you're sitting all by yourself?" Ness did not hesitate to strike up a conversation when he saw the chance. "Oh, if its not Alexis Ness, care to join me for dessert?" "The only dessert I see is standing in front of me" he remarks with a wink, making you laugh sweetly. Oh he definitely understands Kaiser now. "Well but I'm not the type to refuse an offer from a cutie like you" "Oh another great football player calling me cute today, is it my lucky day or what?" 'Another' huh?

He guides you towards the couch where he orders a luxurious dessert for the two of you, on his tab of course. Conversation is made, him asking about you and you asking about him. It must have been quite a while before Kaiser's topic came up.

"So, for how long have you been friends with Kaiser?"

"Kaiser and I go way back. We used to be on the same team"

"Ah he did mention that! He's so debonair and sexy!"

"Oh really? Did something special happen?" You nod. "I said we'll go out on a date if he manages to score a hat trick in his next game. And guess what? He said he'll do it! Ahh he's so cool"

"Well that's Kaiser for you. If he said so he'll most likely do it. *sigh* but it is sad to see such a pretty thing like you being nothing but a name to cross off of his list"

You had 'shocked' written all over your face. "W-what do you mean?" Here it is. " Oh you didn't know? How he's just pursuing you just to get you in bed? Just a little bit of fun before he loses interest in you" "B-but how is that possible? I thought-" "Oh darling I wouldn't have told you about it if I didn't see many girls running out of his bedroom with tears in their eyes"

You looked genuinely sad, an expression which made him almost regret what he has done. "Hey, it's okay, you didn't know. Don't look sad. Here, put your head on my shoulder" Ness comforted you through the pain he had to create himself.

It was the next event where Ness met Kaiser, the one 3 days after Kaiser's match. "Hey Kaiser, long time no see! Congrats on your hat trick! It must have been difficult to pull off" Ness congratulated him with a handshake. "Of course, it's bound to happen when you're the best striker in the world" he has an arrogant smile plastered on his face, but his eyes are searching for someone. Ness knows who.

"Alexis~" "Darling! You're here!" You flug your arms around Ness, his first name rolling off your tongue showing your intimate relationship. Kaiser eyes widen as you proceed to place a kiss on his cheeks. You don't even make eye contact with Kaiser as Ness speaks for the two of you.

"Sorry I did introduce her. This is my girlfriend"

#blue lock #blue lock x reader #alexis ness #alexis ness x reader #yandere #bllk x reader #yandere blue lock #yandere bllk #yandere blue lock x reader #yandere bllk x reader #yandere alexis ness #blue lock ness #yandere blog #male yandere x reader #blue lock fic