#the golden ink so oops

[the-horror-show]

Hey, hey, what's up with the piss powers? 👀

"you are so lucky that your very far apart otherwise i'd bash your brains in. AND IT'S NOT-... CALLED THAT! I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL IT'S EVEN CALLED! DARK PUDDLES? BANISHMENT? HOLY POWERS? GOLDEN INK?!?!?!?! I- OUGH!" she rubs her forehead, grumbling a tiny bit as her eyes glowed slightly "you are so very lucky. to whoever sent this. pray that i don't find you and send you back to the dark puddles myself." she said, sighing lightly "but for your information, i don't know that much about this power, all i know is that it adapts to anything new that is given to me, originally i was able to banish people, and then, i was able to move faster due to a fellow survivor. and then, i gained some kind of... durability? from some crazy lost one that thought himself to be a king. and.... that's it so far." she shrugs, huffing lightly as she crosses her arms "apart from my own little tests with this, unlike Dot and Mila, who are still learning.... im the most experienced and possibly the strongest with this... odd power... that even the ink demon seems to fear. which is surprising since the dark puddles belong to him.... very weird." She said, huffing lightly as she shakes her head, crossing her arms a bit "anyways. they are able to make weapons, while im also able to do that, but mainly able to make an bow and arrows. sometimes coat my own gent pipe in the powers, and-" she pauses, thinking for a moment, huffing at she shakes her head, staring blankly at the camera "very rarely, i am able to see... well... odd messages on the walls... various messages that only certain eyes can see. i don't know what most of them say but. to whoever is leaving them. good luck. i know that im not getting out of here anytime soon... not unless i. continue on with whatever games this demon is playing. and get answers from wilson." She said, huffing as her eyes glowed, frowning for a moment, just pondering slightly

#HAD TO DRAG HER INTO THE CANDLEVERSE FOR A SPLIT SECOND TO HAVE HER SEE THIS SHIT. #NEVER DOING THAT AGAIN. #MY FUCKING EYE IS BURNING CAUSE OF HER POWERS. FUCK YOU 005. #//with that out of the way- uh yeah- first drawing of Audrey! #//still need to figure out a style and design for her in both this AU and in my main. #Mod Toon Posts #THE CYCLEBREAKER. (Audrey) #Lights; Camera; Action! (Asks) #Are We Recording? (Answered Asks) #My Art #My Drawings #Fragments Of The Past (Lore) #MY LOVELY RABBITS. (The Contestants) #had to add some little headcanons of my own about audrey's powers cause i was one of the people who thought that the powers she had was #the golden ink so oops #BUt yeah here she is. she exists on the blog

[storiesoflilies]

metanoia

synopsis: (n.) the journey of changing one’s mind, heart, self, or way of life. Or alternatively, the story of two souls who bond over drinking green tea. w.c: 17k (oops)

pairing: college!toji fushiguro x f!reader (noncurse!AU)

warnings: bucketloads of fluff and sprinkle of angst. descriptions of past bullying (toji didn’t have a nice childhood) SMUT, so minors please do not interact! nipple stimulation, p in v sex (it’s all rather romantic i must say), unprotected sex (these college students need to stop being so horny). a lovely little slow burn romance for the soul. swearing.

a/n: based on this request, and it’s finally here nonie!! a piece of my heart has been woven into this piece, so i hope everyone enjoys! to all my fellow STEM students, this one’s also for you <3 toji art by @/kakashismain, dividers by @/benkeibear. spotify playlist. ao3.

there was nothing else to do or say about fate, other than it was fixed. no matter how hard you might try to change it, she never believed it could be.

life was a series of scrawling numbers and greek letters, written by the hands of angels and god. it was never going to a straight line; rather, it was a scattered mess of ever-changing parabolas, dipping and rising above the axis like surfers on the waves of the sea.

but sometimes, just sometimes, you can hear what has been written about you. if she tuned into things really hard, and listened beyond the banal noises that came with the plane of existence all humans exist in, she could hear it. the scratching of a pen on paper, or perhaps a feather quill on a scroll? yes, that sounded more like it. she could hear the angels solving the puzzle they had been given to balance the equation of her life. things must be solved in a certain series of formulas to become a proven, tangible equation. the angels were still trying to prove her life, it seems, and it was quite simply astounding that they were still working so hard and figuring it out.

but the irrational part of her couldn’t help but think, what if they were bored? she could certainly understand; there were many times when she’d been made to solve trivial questions, such as calculating the speed of an aircraft, and she’d wished she could be anywhere but there in that moment. did the angels think that about her equation? would they ever get bored and just give up on her?

with that, the cold, beautiful reality that is life becomes apparent. none of it was personal, and she had to live it right up until the equation was balanced and the last drop of ink ran dry.

it was golden hour. that time of the day when the sun’s light softened, casting long shadows of buildings and trees across the pavement. warm honey rays filtered in through the window, refracting through the clear plastic display that showcased the traybakes of the day. the cafe was quiet now, just after the hustle and bustle of regular work hours. most of the patrons were university students, drawn to the cafe for its convenient location near the main campus, where they downed their coffees like it was a drug to be taken multiple times a day.

she couldn’t judge them; she was included in that typical student caliber too, but instead of drinking her weight in murky brown caffeine, she preferred it to be of the green kind. more specifically, a cup of green tea took her brainpower much farther than its more popular, teeth-staining counterpart. and the perks of working for the very same cafe?

every cup of it was free and unlimited use for her; something she took advantage of every single shift.

the job couldn’t be more perfect for her. although her shifts were daily, they were always scheduled during these quiet golden hours that extended into the stretch of moonlight, accommodating her university hours. choosing to study a degree in physics was certainly no joke, and she was grateful for any spare moment of peace to work on her assignments and reports. her manager never minded, leaving her to riddle away at her numbers, which went straight over their head, trusting her to still serve any customers coming in and close up the shop.

it was absolutely fine. a simple, predictable routine – an equation she was perfectly happy to solve every single day.

until it wasn’t so easy.

| Φ |

some time later that night, well after the sun had dipped below the horizon and the moon had finally peeked out from behind dusty grey clouds, the delicate bell above the doorway tinkled. it snapped her straight out of her trance, where she had been listening to the music of mathematical constants singing to her of defined, set values from the sheet of paper leaning against the wooden clipboard of ‘speciality beverages’.

it was him.

toji fushiguro.

the dark haired boy she had seen around campus, although he probably hadn’t noticed her flitting about between lectures; unusually quiet and unfairly attractive. the boy who obviously frequented the gym close by, and came here to her little cafe afterwards. that much was obvious from the way the wet strands of hair stuck to his forehead, the spicy smell of whatever body wash he used, and the all black attire he always wore. the very same same boy who she’d curiously asked about, only to be told that he kept to himself and didn’t really speak to anybody.

and she believed it. she had never seen him walking with anybody else, or even bringing anyone along to his daily study sessions at the cafe. the way he grimaced at loud, boisterous students, typical of their age group, told her enough. that toji fushiguro didn’t seem to like people very much, and was perfectly happy with not being liked in return.

“hello,” she meekly piped out, her voice barely above a squeak, because toji was quite an intimating figure. “what would you like?”

it was a silly question. she knew he would order his usual – green tea, just like her. but it was a question she asked regardless, just in case his routine equation had somehow changed. you never know, after all. perhaps the angels had miscalculated or wrote down a wrong number.

“green tea, please,” he grunted, not quite meeting her eyes. he then sauntered off to his usual table by the window, and began pulling out his study material from his canvas bag.

she was grateful for the simplicity; there was nothing worse than preparing an elaborate order in the quiet of the night and disturbing the peace. brewing green tea was something she knew like the back of her hand, easy and peaceful like breathing. she strained the herbs as she poured it into a delicate ceramic cup, which the cafe insisted on serving it in, and brought it over to him.

toji muttered a small thank you, and she politely smiled, even though he never once looked at her. walking back to her spot behind the counter, she placed the clipboard on her crossed legs, and resumed her musings. such was their routine, both of them in their respective worlds within the same plane that was the cafe, sipping their green tea and whittling away at their education.

she almost felt honored that of all the cafes open late into the night, this was the one he picked to come to. even if the bitter, realistic part of her insisted that it was only because it was conveniently close to the gym. still, their equations followed the exact same sequence of numbers at that time every day, and she found that positively wonderful.

it was nearing 10:30p.m. when she finally finished solving her report, and she guessed that toji was completely engrossed in whatever he was working on to not notice the time. he would have normally packed up his things by now, ordering one more cup of tea before heading off wherever it was he went to in the dead of night. probably back to his accommodation, because he just didn’t seem like the type to show up to late-night parties full of booze and sweat.

she didn’t know what to say, or how to say it. the logical part of her brain was overthinking everything because this just wasn’t the norm for them. toji was supposed to have packed his things, leave just the exact amount of money on the counter, and walk out without another word. she was considering not even saying anything at all, biding her time until he simply realized himself and walked out.

until her legs moved of their seemingly own accord, perhaps a result of the numbers being messily rubbed away and rewritten, straight towards him. he never even heard her; his black wired earbuds were firmly in his ears, and she wondered what sort of music it was that toji fushiguro listened to. she quickly tapped his shoulder, withdrawing her hand back to her side as quickly as she could. toji almost jumped out of his skin as he turned to acknowledge her.

“sorry,” she apologized, looking pointedly over at the clock on the wall above him. “but we’re closing soon.”

toji frowned, as if he didn’t really believe her, until he glanced at the digital clock on his laptop and jumped into action. “sorry,” he said rather awkwardly, hurriedly packing up his things as she stood at a respectful distance away.

“it’s no problem at all. please, take your time,” she replied as politely and delicately as she possibly could, looking away as he messily scraped his papers and notebooks into his bag.

his chair scraped uncomfortably across the floor, and he heaved his bag over his shoulder as he shoved a hand into his pocket, fishing for the exact change he needed. for a second, she thought, hoped, that he would hand it to her. but no, he almost jogged over to the counter and placed it right next to the black mug of green tea beside her clipboard.

toji paused, momentarily staring at her mug. she felt a flush of embarrassment, as if even he knew she wasn’t supposed to be drinking it out of a large mug. but he said nothing and rushed outside.

everything fell back into place, as according to the laws of the world, and seemed right again.

| Φ |

there was something inherently uncomfortable about contemplating the future.

as summer rapidly approached, with only about four months left of the semester, she found herself forced to confront equations she didn’t want to solve. it was during the night, when she should have been fast asleep, that she really tried to listen in on the angels scribbling away at her numbers. it was cheating really, an easy way out to hear the answers of what she was supposed to do. perhaps if the end of her final year wasn’t so dreadfully final, then it would have been easier to formulate her own answers.

well, they weren’t really her own, but anyway.

she was in her own little bubble tonight, absentmindedly sipping her tea and tapping her pen against the clipboard. she knew the answer to the problem at hand, some menial question about what angle a beam of light would reflect at, and so she could afford to daydream and listen to the music of the numbers singing in her head.

it was quite easy to imagine a picture being painted from the numbers. why bother calculating the angle when you could visualize the light bending instead? that was what mattered in the end, not just the face value of the number itself, but the tangible reality they represented. there was no point in scribbling away at the numbers if you couldn’t paint a picture in your mind of the light itself or feel the thumping of sound waves reverberating through the surrounding medium.

there was only her and toji in the cafe now. he’d breezed past her earlier on the way in straight to his seat, dumping his bag on the table with the air of a student who was beyond fed up with their lot. she knew what it looked like; she’d seen it too many times throughout the years and had been through that position herself.

she tried not to make it obvious she was looking at him, or admiring the way his arms moved in the tight compression shirt he wore, the way his wet hair was slightly slicked back today, and the way his annoyance sparked a beautiful flame of green in his eyes.

he looked over at her, and she quickly looked away.

dammit.

she heard his footsteps approaching her, but her embarrassment forced her not to look at him. instead, she focused heavily on pretending to be stuck on the paper in front of her.

“hey, uh, can i get a green tea, please?” he asked, his voice deep and undeniably addictive.

“yes, of course!” she replied swiftly, putting on her best customer service voice to shield her embarrassment as best as she possibly could.

toji shifted his feet from side to side, his hands in his pockets, and mumbled, “could i possibly have it in a mug, or something? it’s just… the teacups are really small.”

a deviation in the curve, an unexpected variable. she answered anyway, perhaps a little unsurely, “oh, sure, yeah. no problem at all. is this one fine?” she lifted her mug awkwardly off the table, and toji looked at it and nodded.

“yeah, that would be great. is it, uh, more expensive?” he asked, and the way he asked it made her heart ache, as if he was ashamed of having to in the first place.

she waved her hand at him, playing it off like a silly unnecessary question. “oh no, not at all. don’t worry about it.”

toji seemed visibly gladdened at this, the tension in his face releasing as his eyes brightened. he stood there, swinging on the balls of his feet, and she was quite surprised he was waiting for her to finish brewing the tea instead of bringing it over to him. she had to steady the slight tremor in her hand as he watched her brew the tea with practiced precision. after what seemed like an eternity, she placed the mug on a small plate and carefully handed it to him.

“thanks,” he said quietly, his eyes fixated on the mug and the thin wisps of steam wafting from it. then, like an afterthought that was actually painfully thought out, he added, “appreciate it.”

she could have sworn the corner of his lip lifted, and she almost lost her footing as she sat back down on her stool. though she knew it was impossible, it seemed as if time had been stuck in that moment, the laws of physics crying out for some sense of normalcy to resume.

and so she cleared her throat, pulling free time from where its coat was stuck on the doorknob. “no worries. let me know if you need anything else.”

but he was already walking back to his seat, firmly slotting back the numbers and variables into the places they were supposed to be.

newton’s first law of motion states that an object at rest or uniform motion will continue to stay that way unless acted upon by a net external force.

or the law of inertia, as it was also called, and she much preferred that instead. it was what she thought of every time she saw toji making his way to the door of the cafe from the window, taking large, purposeful strides like he knew where he always wanted to go at all times. he was that object in uniform motion, his life seemingly constant without any real deviations. she thought of it every time he walked out of the door too, and wondered if there would ever be anything significant enough to achieve a large enough force to change his trajectory.

so what large enough force had been applied to make him finally ask for a change to how he drank his tea? maybe he had never considered it before, never realized there was any other option other than the abysmally tiny teacup he had used before. perhaps the fact that he had stopped and seen her mug the night before had opened up new possibilities for him. whatever it was, it didn’t really matter, because he looked so much more at ease now that he wasn’t hanging on for dear life to a teacup too small for those hands of his.

those big, attractive hands, with good, strong veins running through them.

toji looked up at her from behind his laptop.

the tip-taps of her pen became just a notch louder, and she bit her lip, almost crossing her eyes as she focused a little too hard into the hole of the letter ‘a’ in the word ‘angle’.

dammit.

| Φ |

it was march, and the cherry blossoms that grew around campus were now blossoming in full swing.

what little free time she had between university work, endless laboratory reports, and working at the cafe, was spent walking around the town and parks. while hearing the songs of physics and numbers was her way of life, sometimes it was nice to wind down and appreciate the beauty of biology and chemistry. to see how the rain that fell from the skies was soaked up by the weed flowers thriving in the cracks of the pavement. they were tiny little warriors, persevering in the face of the hundreds of people who surely walked this path, avoiding death by being crushed.

the air was cool, and it was late enough in the day to make it feel much cooler than it should have been. she rubbed her arms through her jacket and picked up the pace. it was a week break in the semester, and it was much busier than it should have been for that time of the day. her manager had offered her more hours to work during the break, and she had mistakenly accepted the offer instead of taking some time for herself to do what she liked.

she entered the cafe, the little bell chiming, and smiled at her colleague, who seemed rather grateful that they weren’t alone to deal with the swarm of students enjoying a relaxing coffee. it was rather different from the anxious energy that usually accompanied students in here, but it was a welcome change to see unburdened smiles before the exam season hit them all in full merciless force.

together, they took on the onslaught of orders from all the customers walking into their quaint little cafe in the middle of campus. she couldn’t remember the last time she’d made such complex teas, brewing flavor combinations she couldn’t even concoct in her wildest dreams. by the end of the rush, with her colleague having finished their shift, she was left in a frazzled state of tea stains and sticky sugary syrup.

and that is precisely when toji fushiguro decided to walk through the door.

she almost froze, a mixture of shock and embarrassment washing over like a bucket of ice-cold water. why, she’d never seen him in the cafe while the sun was still in the sky, and he wasn’t even dressed in his usual fitness attire either. instead, it was a black jumper and jeans. this was most certainly not part of the equation at all; she had never even considered to calculate the probability of such an event occurring.

“hey,” he greeted, as casual as the jeans he was wearing, while fidgeting with the hem of his jumper.

“hi,” she answered, dusting off some imaginary dust from her apron because she didn’t know what else to do with her hands. “the usual?”

toji seemed somewhat surprised at this. “yeah, please.”

she couldn’t lie; it was such a welcome relief to make something so simple amidst the chaos that was the ever-changing trends of beverages. had the universe written an additional formula just to provide her with just a moment’s respite? or was it the law of attraction being employed?

no, that was surely wishful thinking. there was no way that toji fushiguro had anything in common with her.

“are you sitting in or taking away?” she prompted, the extra words slipping through her lips.

he thought about it for a second before nodding his head, “uh, yeah, takeaway please.”

“no problem,” she replied smoothly, amazed at how well she was deviating from their usual interactions, and poured the tea into a disposable cup. “there you go.”

toji mumbled a ‘thank you’ as he carefully placed the coins on the counter, his hands completely enveloping what she would have once considered a large cup.

what compelled her to say the following words, she didn’t really know, but she called out in a hopefully not-so-loud voice as he turned to leave, “enjoy the blossoms!”

just why? why would you say that?

she was even more mortified when toji simply walked out the door without sparing her a second glance. the universe was cruel for adding that into the equation, and she could have sworn, to add further insult to injury, that two girls had watched their exchange and were snickering.

enjoy the blossoms? stupid, stupid, stupid!

| Φ |

for the rest of the day, she felt as if the second law of thermodynamics very much applied to her.

as she recounted her absolutely horrific exchange with toji, she felt the heat of the universe pressing down on her isolated being, causing her atoms inside of her to bounce of the walls that was her skin, sending her into a more and more disorganized chaotic state of existence. she actually hoped for once that the deviance of the otherwise constant line would continue to do so, and that toji wouldn’t come to the cafe later on that night. then she could resume solving the equation as it was meant to be solved for the next night, and she could continue on as if nothing ever happened in the first place.

so when their routine did end up resuming its normalcy, and toji walked into the cafe with his dark wet hair and canvas bag, she was too mortified to even speak to him, despite him being the only customer in the shop. she got straight to work brewing him his tea, avoiding even looking anywhere near him as he set his things down at the table.

her lack of attention, for once, almost caused a head-on collision.

“hey, oh shit! sorry,” toji cussed, even though it was completely her fault, as he stopped whatever momentum he had in his body from crashing into her.

she hissed as the scalding tea splashed onto her fingers. “oh, no, i’m sorry! are you alright?”

“yeah, don’t worry about it.”

with a wobbly, quivering lip, she went around him and placed his mug on the table, being careful to avoid placing the wet bottom anywhere near his papers. it was there she caught a glimpse of some messily scrawled-out calculations on a piece of scratch paper, and her brain immediately started to sing.

no, don’t stare. it’s rude.

“sorry again,” she whispered, looking straight at the ground and being careful to not step in his way again.

toji never even made a sound, and she didn’t dare to look up to see if he was looking at her. she ran her finger under some cold water before taking her usual seat at the counter, and picked up where she left off on summarizing her lectures. it was perfectly quiet now, save for the scratching of her pen on paper and toji typing away on his keyboard. this was peaceful, easy, and– hold on. why could she hear the sound of the music?

“hey, sorry to interrupt,” toji interjected, making her jump. “do you have any sandwiches or something left?”

“oh! no, i’m sorry, what’s on display is what’s left,” she answered shakily, putting her pen down on the counter. “i, um- the protein balls are pretty decent, if you like that sort of thing.”

“oh, sure. yeah,” he murmured, looking at the several flavors that were available. “I’ll take the, uh, peanut flavor. that any good?”

she smiled softly, despite the throbbing sensation in her finger. “yeah, it’s not bad. you want two?” he nodded, and she wrapped them both up in a paper bag as he procured out coins from his pocket.

toji dug around some more, patting down his pockets to make sure there was definitely nothing lingering in there, and his stomach audibly growled. the air became a touch too awkward, and she stared at the sad-looking change on the counter. she slid the bag over to him with quiet understanding, and gave him the kindest smile she possibly could.

“hey, don’t worry about it. it’s on the house,” she encouraged. “sorry, i should have said that from the beginning.”

toji shook his head, running a hand through his hair. “oh no, i couldn’t do that. sorry, i’ll just leave it. i thought i had enough change.”

she pushed the bag further towards him. “it’s fine, i insist. please.”

he slowly took the bag, as if he wasn’t sure that it was real, or that it was maybe going to bite him. “thanks,” he said quietly, and retreated back to his seat, packing up his things, while she sat there trying to will her atoms back into their rightful place.

“thanks again,” toji rumbled softly as he held the door halfway open. “i’ll see you tomorrow?”

“o-oh yeah! yeah, see you tomorrow,” she stuttered back.

with that, he closed the door behind him, the bell tingling a beautiful farewell for him, and she was left with the atoms of her thumping heart completely dispersing into the atmosphere as she frantically tried to claw them back down.

| Φ |

tomorrow came and went, and they had settled into a slightly different flow of their routine, although the core essence remained the same.

instead of waiting for her to bring over his tea, toji now waited at the counter for her to hand him a large, steaming mug of his fix. they never spoke anymore than what they did before, but there was something that had changed between them. something so subtle that it couldn’t be defined properly, but she knew it was there, and she hoped toji knew it too.

it was april now, and the flurry of students cramming for their exams in may were in full swing. when she wasn’t at the cafe, she was holed up in her shared accommodation, buried underneath a blanket that may as well have been a black hole swallowing her whole. there, she studied for the last set of exams she would ever have to sit at university, but she tried not to dwell on that fact.

not that she didn’t study at the cafe, but toji’s presence added an extra dynamic that made it difficult to focus as well as when she was alone. despite her best efforts, she couldn’t help but constantly glance at him when she was confident he wasn’t looking. right now, she could tell he was silently stressing over his exams too. spending so long in silence with another person meant she could tell the slight quirks in his face that signalled a changed in trajectory of emotion.

currently, the deep frown lines etched in his forehead meant that he was monumentally stuck on something. he’d been like that ever since he powered up his laptop and stared at the screen, the dim light casting an artificial, cold glow on his face.

once again, she didn’t know what compelled her to do what she did next. maybe it was the fact she knew he had barely touched his tea, and it was surely cold by now. or maybe it was the desire to momentarily distract him from his frustration by bringing him a warm, fresh brew. whatever it was, her body was moving according some new formula the angels had applied, and she found herself simply walking over without saying anything and placing a piping hot mug next to his laptop.

“huh? oh, thanks,” toji said slowly, daze-like, as if he wasn’t sure she was real and doing this.

she smiled softly, quickly glancing at the scratch paper in front of him, and oh no – he wasn’t composing the music correctly at all.

“that isn’t the answer,” she stated simply, looking back up at him. he frowned again, momentarily confused, until she pointed at his paper and said, “you’ve calculated this wrong. that isn’t the right equation to use.”

toji looked back down at his paper, sighing softly, and rubbed his face as he seemed to sink deeper and deeper into his chair. she couldn’t understand it; there was absolutely nothing to be ashamed of in getting a question wrong. she’d done it before herself many times, and more than likely would continue to do so.

“sorry, i-uh, i’m not very good at mathematics,” he mumbled shyly, and her heart started to crumble like a biscuit.

she pulled her pen out of her pocket and clicked it once. “no need to be sorry. do you want me to show you how to do it?”

toji nodded wordlessly, and slid the paper over to her, angling the laptop so she could see the question displayed. it was about calculating the speed of an athlete's arm as they threw a ball through the air, but he hadn’t used the correct equation, nor the correct standard units. she quickly wrote out every step of how to solve it, did a final check that her mental calculations were correct against his gray calculator, and slid the paper back to him.

“there, be careful with your units and don’t forget to include them. most of my professors have strict marking against not writing the proper ones, i don’t know about yours, but it might be better to be safe than sorry,” she explained, her throat tightening as he intently looked at her working out.

it felt personal on another sort of level, and strangely intimate.

he seemed to be taking his time studying it, with a slightly blank look, as if what she had done was still going well over his head. “yeah, good point. thank you,” was all he mustered, and he tilted his head at the scratch paper.

“do you want me to explain anything?” she prompted, half expecting him to pretend that he understood everything. that would have been typical of a student at university - faking it until they somehow made it.

so she was pleasantly surprised, but not at all unwilling to explain it when toji nodded again, a light dusting of pink on his cheeks. she tried to recall how her teachers in high school had taught her these concepts, trying to adapt their tone of voice: patient and understanding. she leaned over to be more at eye level at him, trying to seem less intimidating, and their close proximity was sending her brain into overdrive.

“i hope this makes more sense now,” she said as she wrapped up the explanation.

toji’s lips formed a small ‘o’ shape, and the scar gracing them resembled the greek letter phi, but with the line running over to the right side instead of the middle. if she didn’t need anymore proof that the boy sitting in front of her was perfect, then the angels had just thrown in the winning factor.

phi, the perfect golden constant, now belonged in her mind only to toji fushiguro.

“uh, yeah actually,” he hummed, seemingly appreciative, his eyes sparkling against the dim lighting of the cafe. “thanks so much.”

she couldn’t help it, but she grinned widely. “no problem at all.”

she started to walk away, biting her lip when she turned her back to him, already feeling the bitter sting of disappointment that things would probably be back to normal after yet another deviation. until toji called out, “you’re really good at this. what do you study?”

“physics,” she replied, hoping the shock wasn’t too evident in her voice. “what about you?”

“P.E.,” he answered, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. she had to try very hard not to stare at how nice his biceps looked. “i stupidly decided to add a sports biomechanics module as my optional one. kinda regretting it now.”

toji chuckled halfheartedly, and she almost swooned, but opted to tilt her head to the side and say, “oh, but don’t you find it fascinating? it’s the numbers behind the real output of an athlete.”

“oh, well i never really thought about it that way.” he seemed to be genuinely pondering her outlook on the matter, staring hard at the numbers before him, and she felt the blood rising to her cheeks. toji looked back up at her and smiled a devastatingly handsome smile. “i suppose it makes sense for you to think like that.”

she didn’t really know how to reply to that except an, “i guess so,” and then added a polite follow-up of, “what sort of sport do you, then?”

“judo and jujutsu,” toji replied smoothly and completely casually. “i train at the gym before i come here.”

“oh yeah? that’s quite intense.”

“not so much if you enjoy it, really.”

“easy for you to say. you’re obviously in much better shape than the rest of us.”

she almost cringed externally at that.

obviously much better shape? why on earth would you say obviously, stupid?

but toji only chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “hard work, i guess.” he mumbled, staring back at his paper.

she glanced up at the time, noting that it was almost time to close. “well, I'm sorry, but you might have to practice it yourself at home.”

he looked panicked for a second, his eyes darting over to the clock. “oh, yeah. probably.” and started to slowly pack up his things.

she didn’t want to observe him anymore than she already had, so she busied herself by washing their mugs and quickly wiping down the counter for the morning shift, while toji was taking his time neatly packing away his things. was it wishful thinking that perhaps he was stalling. whether it was or wasn’t, she left him to it, switching off the lights everywhere except at the entrance. she swept her eyes over the cafe to make sure she hadn’t missed anything before heading out.

toji stood beside the door, his eyes flitting about anywhere but her, obviously waiting for her to finish locking up. she tried to ignore the fluttering in her chest and smiled awkwardly at him as he finally met her gaze. he shuffled outside before she did, hands in his pockets as he looked up at the nights sky, the silver moon shining between stringy wisps of clouds.

he looked like a scene straight from a movie – a movie where a beautiful boy was up against the weight of the world. she could see it all clearly now: his scuffed up trainers, canvas bag with dirt stains scraping the bottom of it, the hole in his shirt near the hem. and yet, she knew he had real strength, the quiet sort of kind, that would completely surprise anybody that decided to come at him.

she locked the door behind her, the keys jangling, disturbing the relative quiet of the street. the distant whooping of boisterous students, no doubt drinking and partying away their stress, could be heard a little ways off into the distance. the bright light of the 7-11 across the streets flickered, and she briefly considered buying some cheap dinner before heading home.

she cleared her throat and gave him a small smile. “well, good luck studying.”

toji breathed out a half-hearted laugh. “thanks, i’ll need it.”

“if you’re still having trouble with your calculations, you can always ask me tomorrow,” she reassured, feeling bold enough to assume that his equation would continue to equate to hers.

he seemed to hesitate, as if debating something within his head, and replied, “yeah, sure.” but his tone left much to be desired, and she was already kicking herself for being so direct. “sounds good.”

she bit her lip and mumbled a weak ‘goodnight’ before walking straight into the 7-11 to escape.

| Φ |

the next night in the cafe, after quite a long day of punching numbers into her calculator and her eyes swimming with all sorts of symbols, she was contemplating the sheer power of a supernova explosion. it was golden hour, and toji had arrived much earlier to study. his deviations from the norm weren't so jarring anymore, and she’d almost come to sort of expect them at this point. he’d actually met her eyes as she prepared his tea, and even offered her a smile and a ‘thank you’.

the time passed on quickly, and soon enough, it was just her, toji, and two other customers – fellow students – inhabiting the same area. it was around 9:17p.m., the usual time for it to be a sacred silence. so when four boys staggered through the door, the bell cried out aggressively from the force of them nearly ripping open the door, completely tearing her from whatever daydreams she had been lost in.

they were cruel, uncaring about her or the other patrons they were disturbing with their raised voices and boisterous behavior. she kept her cool, not letting their jeers and sly comments get to her as she prepared their orders, wanting to get them out of the cafe as soon as she possibly could. one of them was particular unnerving, staring at her more than the others did, a creepy smirk on his lips and dangerous glint in his eyes. he was like a black hole, and she felt as if she was about to be swallowed alive.

she felt like she couldn’t breath, as if her body didn’t remember the biomechanical process to allow her to expand her lungs and fill them with sweet air. were the angels in serious danger of their calculations becoming completely wrong? was her equation to become something twisted and tragic by the end of the night?

when the group left, the evil boy had glanced over his shoulder to give her one last indecipherable look before he took off at a run after his friends. she exhaled shakily, willing her body to remember how to breath, and decided to distract herself by cleaning any and all random nooks and crannies she could find in an effort to distract herself.

oh how she hated them those stupid, idiotic boys – and that their words and manners had such an impact on her.

she’d worked herself into such a state that she hadn’t even noticed toji standing awkwardly at the counter until she turned to sip at her ice-cold tea, and almost yelped in surprise.

“hey,” toji greeted gently, delicate raindrops against a pane of glass. “it’s eleven.”

and so it was as she noted the time on the clock. she wiped her brow and discarded the now completely blackened cleaning cloth into the rubbish. “sorry, i’ll just get the keys now. you head on.”

“no, it’s okay,” he hummed. “take your time. i’ll be outside.”

when she finally finished the usual locking-up routine, toji had resumed that vision of perfection from the previous night, and it was almost impossible to even consider, but he was even more dreamy than before. toji had to have been carved by michealangelo; born of marble and beauty, and forced to to live in this plane of existence. in some rural countryside of japan, at a public university campus, surrounded by bog-standard students trying to scrape through life.

she felt he didn’t really belong here, as if he was already slipping through her fingers, even though he never really was between them to begin with.

“see you tomorrow,” she said in farewell, giving him a small wave and already walking away.

the loud thuds against the pavement reverberated the immediate vicinity, and toji huffed as he caught up to her, “hey, uh, whereabouts do you live?”

“not too far, about a ten-minute walk away,” she replied, almost floored at the fact that he had just run after her. “why?”

“just… you ok if i tag along? i could use the company.”

“…sure?”

they walked side by side in silence, and her mind was going into complete overdrive. she was trying so hard not to be completely floored that somehow, on a random April night, toji fushiguro was walking her home. it was obvious that he was lying about company – perhaps not an outright lie, but it definitely wasn’t the whole truth. time seemed to have passed quicker than it should have, and before she knew it, they had arrived at her accommodation. toji seemed to hover, looking over his shoulder, his body seemingly tense.

“well, this is me,” she announced, jingling her keys for good measure. “huh, are you okay?”

toji was glaring into the darkness, into the twisted labyrinth of twists and turns in between buildings, only really half-listening. “yeah,” he replied tersely, his fists clenching. “you’re staying at home tonight, right?”

she nodded nervously, suddenly hyperaware of the deep, foreboding inkiness of the night. “mhm.”

he turned to her, verdant eyes simmering with something nearly as dark as the sky. “good, i’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“bye, toji.”

but he was already striding off into the labyrinth, off to face the dirt and coal thrown at him, when he himself was made of marble and gold.

| Φ |

a week after toji had walked her home, she had her first final exam, during which the whole time her thoughts were consumed by him.

of toji fushiguro.

toji and his eyes of forests and jade. of his sculpted body, and all the angles and lines that made up his face. his scar that made him golden and perfect, her phi. of how she had seen him on campus the next morning after he walked her home, wearing a white t-shirt and jeans, split knuckles raw and red against the marble of his skin. how he’d finally noticed her outside the cafe for the first time and actually smiled at her.

her friends – more so acquaintances who had happened to become close simply because they were on the same course –had noticed the exchange. when toji had walked well out of earshot, they had bombarded her with hushed whisper-yells of excited “oh my god!" and "how did you even get him to smile? i’ve never even heard him speak.”

and she’d shrugged them off, fending off their curiosity with, “oh, he comes to the cafe all the time, that’s all.”

she didn’t want to get into all the details of toji and her. well, just toji really – there was no 'and her'. their time together was a coveted treasure, and she was strangely possessive over it.

that night, as she handed toji his tea, she plucked up the courage to ask, “what happened to your hands?”

toji automatically looked down at them, flexing them as if even mentioning them made them burn with pain. “oh, nothing, just went a bit too hard at training.” it didn’t occur to her not to believe him until she was staring blankly at the last question of her exam.

she thought of the evil boy in the cafe, of toji staring down into the darkness and looking over his shoulder as if demons were just behind them, and he was the only thing keeping them at bay. maybe he really was doing just that. maybe that’s why he had continued to walk her home every night, as their graphs continued to overlap even more closely together.

she came out of that exam feeling as if some sort of hidden revelation was waiting to be discovered, and by god, how much she loved to solve for a new equation.

toji was already waiting for her at the cafe when she arrived for her shift, an occurrence steadily getting earlier. he immediately took note of her coming in, and his eyes lit up. she smiled brightly at him, offering him two thumbs up, to which he grinned and pushed away his laptop before approached her.

“so, it went well then?” he prompted, the ghost of a smile still playing on his lips.

she poured them both two mugs of tea, and held hers out towards him. “yeah, it wasn’t too bad actually. cheers to that!”

toji chuckled and clinked his mug with hers, the both of them blowing on the tea before sipping it tentatively. he went back to his table, resuming whatever he had been doing, and leaving her to serve the customers. that was perhaps the only drawback of toji arriving earlier - that their time spent together was interrupted. but it also served as a tantalizing countdown to when it was just the two of them.

obviously, their dynamic had shifted dramatically in the past week, and they’d settled into an easy-flowing sequence – something that felt as if phi would be, so perfectly balanced and positively golden. toji seemed to want to unveil the mystery of his equation to her, but bit by bit, which she didn’t mind at all. she loved slowing figuring out the scale of his axes, plotting all his points together, and finally drawing the curve that connected them all.

toji fushiguro could only be described as steady, a mountain that would never bend or break, his roots so profoundly deep that she had to really dig to see them. he loved his body, but not in a superficial way, but more that it was something he was in control of and could continually improve. she discovered that he drank green tea not just because it was healthy, but because it was cheap. how most of his gym wear had varying sizes of holes, and he carried around a tiny sewing kit in his bag at all times because he sometimes only noticed one when he was out and about.

most importantly, today he had divulged what he wanted for his future.

“i want to get out of this hellhole as soon as i can,” toji had sighed exaggeratedly, stretching his neck backwards. whenever the last customer had left the cafe, he’d drag a chair over to the edge of the counter. not so directly in front of it that he was blocking any customers, but just enough so that they were sitting across from each other.

she rolled her eyes playfully at him, nibbling at the cap of her pen. “oh, how original. you and every other student in this university.”

“well yeah, obviously, but not as much as me,” he retorted.

“what make you so different, then?”

“i’ve always wanted to leave, even before i got here. i want to to go and live in tokyo.”

“tokyo, huh? and what do you wanna do there?”

“well, eventually i want to open my own dojo and teach jujitsu, but i’d probably have to start out as an instructor.”

“oh wow, you’ve got a solid sort of plan. have you always wanted to do that?”

“yeah, i really hate it here.”

and he’d gone quiet, but she didn’t press him. instead, she focused on her textbook because there were still exams to be studied for, and waited for toji to come back to her. where he went in those moments, she didn’t know. there was something lurking in the shadow of the mountain, and he still seemed to be fighting against it even now.

she knew he’d come back to her when he’d lean in closer, cheek against his palm, and try to make sense of whatever diagrams appeared on the pages she was reading.

“that looks cool,” toji murmured, pointing at whatever had piqued his interest. “what is it?”

and she discovered, not that it was a real shock, that toji was so very curious. he wanted to know things, he liked to know how things worked, and he was really clever. she would explain as best as she could, and toji would follow along diligently, nodding his head every so often and asking the occasional question. many people probably underestimated just how smart he really was, but she never did.

“this is a diagram that sort of shows what einstein’s theory of general relativity is all about.”

“ah right, it’s pretty famous then isn’t it? cuz it’s einstein's.”

“haha, i suppose so, yeah.”

“what’s it about?”

she bit her lip and tilted her head, placing her finger as a makeshift bookmark and closed the book between her fingers. “it’s about… how really big objects like planets and stars cause gravity by bending space-time.”

“Bending space-time is gravity?”

“It’s because the bigger object has caused smaller ones to be pulled closer to it, if that makes sense.”

toji nodded slowly and laughed. “it’s a bit over my head. how you perfectly understand it is beyond me though.”

“i wouldn’t say perfectly,” she replied bashfully. “but i think it’s a beautiful theory.”

“you think every theory is beautiful.”

“haha! no, well yes, but that’s besides the point!”

“well, what is the point?”

“that something has had such a profound impact, because it’s so big and larger than life that it’s impacting all the other small things around it and pulling them in closer to it.”

toji smiled, the kind of smile he had when he was more vulnerable and soft, when his barriers were down and forgotten about. the way he looked at her made her body jolt with thousands of little lightning bolts.

“yeah,” he mused thoughtfully. “yeah, that is kinda beautiful.”

| Φ |

five days.

that’s how long it had been since she’d seen toji, and she missed him more than she cared to admit, even to herself.

it wasn’t ideal, right smack in the middle of the exam season, to be so distracted by a boy, but toji fushiguro wasn’t just any boy. he was the boy who she spent every day with, and the past two weeks had been a rosy dream as they talked more and more. it was now the middle of may, and she was almost done with sitting all of her exams. she should have been thinking of her future, about a solid career plan, and where she wanted to live.

but no, all she could think of was the laws of physics and toji fushiguro, and counting down the days until she could see him again.

he was currently out on a placement excursion, teaching ten-year-old kids during their regular sports curriculum. it was almost comical, and she couldn’t help but smile to herself whenever she thought of toji surrounded by a bunch of wide-eyed children. he’d already been groaning about it before he left, about this and that, and how much he didn’t like silly kids and their silly faces.

“what are you smiling about?” one of her friends whispered suspiciously, leaning in closer to her so as not to disturb anybody else in the library.

she shook her head, and told a little lie, “oh, just about how close we are to finishing uni. it’s sort of unbelievable.”

her friend raised a brow, clearly not believing her. “sure, and it doesn’t have anything to do with fushiguro?”

“ugh, why do you keep bringing him up all the time? i told you there’s nothing going on there.”

“i’ll believe that when i stop seeing you smiling like an idiot in love. now, c’mon and focus on this.”

love? no, no, it wasn’t love. not quite yet, at least, but she knew it was getting there. she felt a slight tremor in her chest, traveling all the way to the tips of her fingers and then the ends of her toes like an electric current across a wire. it was unfathomably scary to admit it, but it was nothing but the truth.

she was falling for toji fushiguro.

she ducked her head down, her pencil scratching against her notepad as she attempted yet another sample question, endeavouring to distract herself from all thoughts of him for the rest of the study session. as soon as she had to leave for the cafe, she practically shoved her things into her bag and almost ran towards it. toji should be back today, with it being friday and the school week coming to an end.

when she got there, her manager was behind the counter in the midst of serving a customer, and the cafe was reasonably busy. the overwhelming aroma of coffee wafted through her nose, warm and inviting, and familiar. she wondered if toji thought of her whenever he smelt coffee.

she certainly hoped that he did.

“great you’re here,” her manager beamed, handing her an apron to tie around her waist. “i was wondering if you would like to take some time off whenever you finish your exams? my nephew is coming to visit, and i’d like to put him to work instead of him lazing about all day.”

she was immediately hit with a sheer sense of panic. if she didn’t work, then how else was she supposed to see toji? it was so utterly embarrassing and pathetic, that she was so enamored with this boy that she was willing to work just to see him. but then she thought about what would happen after graduation, and how they realistically would not be seeing each other – perhaps ever again.

“sure, that’s alright with me,” is what she finally said after a moment's hesitation, but her manager surely picked up on her hesitant tone.

“never have i ever seen a student who didn’t want time off work,” they chuckled, hand on their hip. “this has got to do with that dark haired boy, doesn’t it?”

heat creeped up into her cheeks, and she busied herself with pouring a cup of coffee for a customer, as her manager gazed at her in bemusement. “no,” she squeaked out.

“oh to be young again,” they said in a sing-song voice. “don’t worry about not working though, i’m sure that boy would follow you anywhere you go. i’ve seen the way he looks at you.”

she didn’t quite know how to respond to that.

when the moon had risen high into the sky and the shop was empty, she waited and waited for toji. he was late, and he should have been there by now. or maybe he wouldn’t come? she thought it might have been quite bold to assume he would have tonight. he was probably tired from a whole week of teaching, and maybe he had decided to just go home and rest. she couldn’t blame him for that.

but that didn’t stop the soul-crushing disappointment from tearing her in two.

the sky must have felt her distress, because soon enough the pitter-patter of rain falling against the roof ensued. maybe metaphysical pain was real, and maybe she would spend her whole life trying to prove her theory. what a tragic future, she thought, and sniffled as she locked the door behind her.

and then she turned around, and toji was standing there, his chest heaving.

for a moment, they just faced each other. he was all wet, black hoodie all soggy and weighed down, sticking to him like a second skin. his green eyes were alight, looking at her with a mixture of nerves and something else she couldn’t place. toji exhaled shakily, his lashes fluttering as he blinked fast.

“sorry,” he mumbled. “i tried to get here sooner, but there was an accident and my train was delayed.”

her heart melted; she felt as if she was one with the rain puddles in the dips of the pavement, one with the water pooling beneath toji’s feat. could it be love already? maybe her loved ones, wiser and older than her would have said it was, but she felt too young to know it.

and yet, here was a boy standing in front of her, who had run through the rain and labyrinth of buildings to get here.

“oh, toji,” she gushed, instinctively opening up her umbrella and shielding him from the torrent of the sky. “you’ll get sick.”

she didn’t realize just how close they were together, trapped underneath the tiny space, until toji was staring down at her. a water droplet dropped from his hair, over the ridge of his nose, caressing over his cupids bow and parted lips, all the way down to his chin and onto her lip.

she shivered, feeling as if their lips may as well have touched.

“it doesn’t matter,” toji whispered, in that deep, almost sad tone that belonged only to him, and she finally admitted internally just how much she missed his voice. “it’s only water.”

they stood there staring at each other for a heartbeat too long, until she broke the silence with, “let’s get out of here.”

and then they set off at a slow, shuffling pace, the backs of their hands and shoulders brushing against each other, and she thought a live spark might just ignite off her skin. the rain sounded like little stones tumbling off the top of the umbrella, and the smell of the wet pavement served as little momentary distractions against the all-consuming feeling of toji beside her.

she didn’t want it to end, and so when they reached the entrance to her accommodation, and turned to face him. “you can’t go home like this. won’t you come inside and dry off?”

toji’s eyebrows shot up, and he almost looked like a deer in the headlights. he was fighting within himself; she could see it in the way his hand flexed, his knuckle touching hers. “i’ll just make your floor wet though,” he muttered, looking down at the ground.

“it doesn’t matter,” she urged, and added a desperate. “please.”

that seemed to snap him out of whatever internal deliberation he was having, and toji nodded. “okay then.”

she couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face, almost immediately turning towards the door to hide most of it from him, taking out the keys from her pocket and fumbled with one hand to grab the correct one for her door. his proximity behind her was beyond distracting, her back felt like the south side of a magnet, and toji was her north. it would be too easy to fall back into him, and so she endeavored to root her feet into the ground and resist the urge.

she finally opened it and they passed through the unwelcoming vibes of the main lobby, toji’s shoes squelching loudly with every step he took. the student behind the desk glancing uninterestedly up at them, and then sharply looked back up, staring with saucer eyes at toji in tow behind her.

she once again fought with her keys, the sound echoing throughout the empty corridor, and pushed open the door to her shared dorm. it was compact but efficient for two people to live comfortably together. her flatmate was curled up on the sofa with her boyfriend, shui, in the main living area, only lit up by whatever was on the tv.

“roomie!” her roommate called out, oblivious to toji’s presence. “how was studying today?”

“yeah, great,” she answered, glancing back at toji awkwardly standing by the door. “you?”

“all goo- oh! oh. hello there!” her roommate finally registered toji’s presence as the door clicked shut behind him, immediately jumping out of shiu’s arms, who also looked back over his shoulder in intrigue.

“hey,” toji mumbled, a puddle of water now collecting over the white tiles.

shiu waved his hand at toji, who flicked his chin upwards in acknowledgment. she immediately turned to her roommate, “hey, you think you have something from shui’s he could borrow?”

her roommate sprung into action, scrambling off the sofa. “yeah, yeah! sorry! i’ll be right back.”

toji remained where he was, stationary as a rock, his emerald orbs flicking every which way. she wondered what he was thinking, but she was too consumed by the monumental event that he was really standing there in her living room to dwell on it.

her roommate burst out of her room, smiling brightly as she handled a bundle of clothes to toji. “there you go! the bathroom’s just to the left there.”

he strode straight to the bathroom, his eyes meeting hers just before he closed the door.

“girl,” her roommate excitedly whispered, vigorously grabbing her forearms. “what the- what is going on? i didn’t know you and fushiguro were together.”

“we’re not together,” she rebuked, biting her lip. “we’re just… friends.”

her roommate scoffed, nearly bouncing up and down in glee. “shiu, you know this is the first time she’d brought a boy home.”

shiu hummed quietly, an unlit cigarette dangling between his lips. “that’s great, babe.”

her roommate scoffed, rolling her eyes at him, and her grip tightened just a fraction. “is he spending the night? oh my god, you both should stay and watch a movie with us.”

“oh, i don’t think he’ll stay…”

“girl, just go and get changed into something else, and i’ll talk to him when he comes out. you know people can’t say no to me.”

before she knew it, she was being pushed into her room, and the door was slammed behind her. she breathed out shakily, sliding against her wardrobe with her head in her hands. her heart was racing, and fuck fuck fuck, what the hell was she thinking bringing toji here?

she heard the bathroom door open, and the quiet baritone of toji’s voice mingled with her roommate's bubbly one. the words ‘pizza’ and ‘movie’ were mentioned, and she rushed to shimmy off her clothes and into her slightly better-looking loungewear, checking her hair was presentable enough. when she quietly opened her door, toji had his back towards her, wearing a black t-shirt that was a size too small and grey joggers that hugged his thick thighs.

he turned to face her, and the tense look on his face relaxed. her roommate piped up from the sofa, “hey! i was just saying that toji should stay and watch a movie with us while his clothes dry.”

she bit the inside of her cheek, and softly said to him, “you don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

toji looked between her and her roommate, before replying with a low, “I’ll stay.”

her roommate clapped her hands together. “great! I’ll order the pizza.”

she walked over to the adjacent sofa to shiu, and hesitantly sat down on one edge of the sofa. toji followed and lowered himself onto the other empty side, leaving a space of everything and nothing between them. soon enough, her roommate returned and plonked herself right in between shiu’s spread legs, shuffling through the channels until she settled on a movie. the pizza arrived some time into the movie, and the four of them helped themselves. she couldn’t help but steal glances at toji, his face illuminated by the tv's glow as he brought a cheesy slice of pizza to his mouth, his expression blank and unreadable.

whatever way the angels must be solving her cosmic equation, they were obviously applying toji’s formula. their numbers were intertwining, creating a new constant, and she wondered what sort of symbol would represent the two of them.

toji met her gaze, and the corner of his lip curled upward.

after the movie had ended, her roommate had ushered a bemused shiu into her room and wiggled her fingers in an excited goodbye. “shh,” she’d giggled, while shiu rolled his eyes at her, tugging on the sleeve of her pyjama top. “don’t make too much noise, you two.”

and with that, she shut the door, leaving them alone.

together.

in her living room, on the same sofa.

“do you, uh, want to watch something else?” she murmured, her legs folded beneath her.

toji breathed out a quiet laugh. “please. i’m sorry, but that movie was actually so bad.”

she nearly snorted, clapping her hand over her mouth in an effort to contain her giggle. “yeah, it was pretty shit.”

the clock above the tv read 1:42 a.m., and she wondered if toji was tired. she assumed he would be after waking up so early to teach a bunch of energetic children. “you want some tea? i was just going to make some,” she asked, her ankles cracking as she rose from the sofa.

toji slapped his thighs, and steadily got up as well. “sure, but i should really get going soon. i don’t want to overstay my welcome.”

“spend the night,” she blurted out before she could stop herself. “none of us would mind, i promise.”

she then stupidly, pathetically even, held out her pinky towards him. toji frowned, clearly confused. “what are you doing?”

“a pinky promise.”

“oh right, yeah.”

he curled his pinky around hers, and a tiny electric shock sparked between them. she hissed and drew her hand back, but their eyes met, and they both erupted into a fit of hushed giggles, which only served to make them laugh harder.

“okay, you stick something on tv and i’ll make the tea,” she grinned, her bare feet softly padding on the floor as she went over to the kitchen.

as the kettle boiled, she watched toji flicking aimlessly through the channels, his face contorting when he came across something he didn’t like. he settled back onto the sofa, legs spread out as he reclined, mop of thick hair resting against the armrest. the shock of having him her in her home had faded now, and it felt almost natural for them to be around each other in this way. she brought over his mug filled with green tea, and he looked up at her gratefully as he took it from her. she sat down on the other sofa, stretching her legs out. toji’s eyes were slightly red, and he was yawning great big yawns, with the mug delicately balanced on his chest and one arm behind his head. the tv was on a low volume, and the she wanted to pause time, even just for a while.

“hey, just lemme know when you wanna sleep. you can sleep in my room,” she murmured, hands grasping both sides of her mug, feet rubbing against each other.

toji looked over at her, a scowl playing on his features. “and where are you going to sleep, the sofa?”

“well, yeah.”

“no.”

“but you’re the guest!”

“shut up, no.”

“bu-”

“no.”

she huffed playfully, throwing a hand up in surrender, to which toji smirked at. they sat in comfortable silence, watching some silly competition show play on. despite the tea, she could feel herself becoming sleepier by the minute. she looked over at toji, who seemed perfectly content to lie there and watch the contestants make complete fools of themselves.

“bet that guy’s gonna fall off,” he mumbled, his arms folded over his chest. she only hummed in response, her cheek squished against a pillow, and toji grunted, “you the sleepy one now?”

she laughed, which interrupted her yawn. “maybe.”

“go to sleep then. don’t stay up for me.”

oh, how much he didn’t know about how long she would stay up for him, and how long she would really wait. but she couldn’t say anything except, “you sure?”

“yeah, yeah, i’m cool here.”

“hold on, lemme get you a blanket and pillow before i go.”

she returned promptly with them, kneeling down to place them on the floor beside him. when she looked up, she didn’t realize just how close his face was to hers. toji’s eyes flicked down to her lips, then back up to her eyes.

she gulped.

“good night,” he whispered.

“night,” was all she could muster before overcoming the magnetism between them and walking away.

| Φ |

the final stretch.

a flurry of pens on paper, pounding hearts, a tripwire of nerves, and then…

“time is up! please, everyone, put down your pens. the exam is officially concluded.”

she leaned back in her seat, a sheer sense of awe crawling over her. this was it, she was done. her last university exam, all of it was finally over after three long years. her fellow students were of similar sentiment, with wide, nervous smiles, as if they all couldn’t really believe this was happening, as the smacks of numerous pats on the back reverberated through the hall.

the sun was shining on her face as she exited the exam hall, warm and inviting, promising that the hope for the future wasn’t unfounded. they were all high on life, with the thought that the world was their oyster, and they would all be lucky enough to find their own pearls.

“oh my god,” her friend groaned exaggeratedly, hands on her knees as if she’d just run a marathon. “it’s over.”

"yeah, it is," she hummed in agreement, basking in the sheer awe of the moment.

her friend barked out a laugh and clasped her hands together. “right then, i’m going to get ready for the party tonight. you are coming, right?”

“yeah of course,” she confirmed, shocking even herself that she would be going out. “we can only celebrate this once.”

her friend squealed, pulling her into a big hug before breaking away and trotting off. “bring fushiguro! maybe you both can get drunk and finally kiss,” she called out over her shoulder.

a few students looked over at her, and the embarrassment was almost crushing. she’d come to understand now that everyone on campus knew who toji fushiguro was. he was renowned for his adonis figure, the kind of handsome that only existed in fiction, and the fact he most certainly wasn’t associated with any girls or went to any parties.

until perhaps now, of course.

later that night at the cafe, as she fidgeted at her spot behind the counter, she plucked up the courage to ask toji, “so, you can totally say no if you don’t want to come, but there’s a party that’s happening in my building to celebrate the end of exams.”

toji looked up from reading her quantum mechanics textbook she had brought and grunted, “a party, huh. you going?”

“yeah, i’ll be heading over after closing up,” she replied, a bit deflated that he hadn’t seemed to notice she had dressed up quite a bit from her usual attire.

he hummed, nodded, and went back to reading. “i’ll see how i feel.”

that was no definitive reply, and she picked apart his usual baritone and analyzed in her mind as she went through a back-and-forth internal debate, trying to deduce some sort of meaning from it. she’d arrived to the party about an hour ago, and she was still thinking about it as she sipped away at some fruit-flavored punch that was far too delicious and dangerous for someone who didn't really drink. her lips were already numb, and the creeping giddiness was making her feel the joyousness of all that life is and would be.

her course mates had their arms around her shoulders, all of them loudly singing, more slurring really, in a circle to whatever song was thumping through the speakers. a part of her wanted to loose herself in the silliness of it all; it gave her courage and made her seem capable of things she would never have dreamed of sober.

“oh my- don’t look, but fushiguro is actually here,” her friend slurred through her ear, nearly shouting and sending a ringing noise piercing through her eardrum.

she turned around, and sure enough, there was toji fushiguro pushing his way through the throng of students dancing in the cramped apartment they had decided to congregate in. his green eyes met hers, and relief ran over his features. it was cheesy, as well as completely impossible, but time seemed stretch and distort, slowing to a crawl the closer he got to her. her friend released her from the circle, giving her a calculated shove and sending her stumbling over her own feet.

straight into toji’s waiting arms.

“oh, fuck,” he shouted as he caught her, holding her forearms in a firm grip. “you okay?”

she stared up at him, the alcohol running through her blood making her lips spread into a big, dopey smile, and giggled, “yeah, you’re here.”

she could have sworn the tips of his ears turned pink, but the flashing, multicoloured lights made it too hard to make it out properly. it took her far too long to realize that toji still hadn’t let go of her arms, even as her punch had spilled on them both, and as even more people stared and bumped into them.

“you want a drink?” she shouted, standing up on her tiptoes to reach his ear.

toji grimaced. “no thanks, i don’t drink.”

“oh yeah, you’re a proper athlete and all,” she hiccuped, her body flushing with heat and the sound of the music.

he only laughed at that, his emerald eyes twinkling with possibilities.

| Φ |

“be careful,” toji hissed as he quickly moved to steady her as she tripped over the doorway into her dorm. “jesus, you’re a mess.”

“i-hiccup! no, no i’m a ss-shtar,” she wallowed, chuckling madly at her own antics. “ssstar! star.”

“yes, yes, a star, definitely,” toji mumbled, closing the door behind them, and maneuvering her securely along with him.

“hehe, am i youuuur star, toji?” she giggled, her legs giving out from underneath her, suddenly turning into jelly.

he snorted, using her strength to lift her off the floor and into his arms. “yes, you are. now c’mon, let’s get you to bed.”

her head rolled against his chest, her head swimming in a pool of red stars and blue moons, all of them circulating around a green sun. “go onnn, you have to say i’m yo-hiccup-ur star!”

“you’re my star, now c’mon. get into bed.”

as soon as he laid her underneath her duvet, her head started to pound and swirl the moment she closed her eyes, her stomach lurched as if she was actually free-falling, and she groaned loudly. toji kneeled down in front of her, his face oh so very close to hers.

“what’s wrong? you wanna get sick?” he asked, forest eyes deep and ethereal as they took in her probably smeared makeup.

“i close my eyes and it feels bad,” she mumbled, feeling childish as her silliness became too much for even her not-so-sober state to listen to.

toji settled into a more comfortable sitting position, and she could feel his breath caressing her face. “tell me about something then, don’t think about it.”

“like-hiccup what?”

“anything. talk to me about stars, or whatever.”

“stars, really? okay… did you know, that there’s -hic- all different colors?”

“no, i didn’t actually. why’s there so many?”

“cuz they’re all different temperatures, that’s why.”

“that’s really cool. tell me about all the colors.”

“ohh, well there’s blue stars, those're the hottest one. and then there’s…”

| Φ |

she woke up to a throbbing headache and a burning stomach, her eyes hurting as light filtered through the opaque grey curtains of the window. the white wall beside her bed was the first thing she saw when she peeked her eyes open, so dreadfully plain and uninteresting, but rolling over to the other side was another sort of unnecessarily difficult task.

she almost threw up when she saw toji lying there on the floor.

“toji?” she whispered urgently. “toji?! are you awake?”

he grunted in annoyance and rolled over to face her, his midnight hair all messy on a pillow he had procured from who knows where, although there was no blanket to be seen. the light through the curtains softly enhanced his features, the scarred side of his lip twitching as he flitted somewhere in between the realm of dreams and sleep, and oh how her heart was absolutely swooning at the sight.

she smiled to herself, quietly watching him sleep and quickly forgetting about how ill she felt, because none of that mattered. only that she could hear the scratching of quills, ruffling feathers, and the soft music playing, telling her that this was it.

she was in love with toji fushiguro.

there was no other way around it, no more denying it to herself or anyone else. she loved him, the boy who slept on a rock-hard floor beside her all night, listening to her drunk and probably terrible explanations about stars and who knows what else.

green orbs peeked out from hooded lids, and toji mumbled, “what’re you lookin at?”

she bit her lip, trying to contain her giddiness at her sudden revelation, and reached over to poke his hand. “you. why didn’t you sleep on the sofa?”

toji's eyes fully opened, and he grabbed her finger and tugged gently. “cause, what if you needed to get sick and tripped in the dark? you might be a star, but you don’t actually shine, you know?”

“hah, you’re hilarious,” she retorted, letting him waggle her finger with his hand. “what else did i say, then?”

“that i’m the nicest person on earth for staying with you, and that i deserve free green tea from now on.”

“chancer, i definitely didn’t.”

“but how do you know you definitely didn’t?”

a loud knock at her door jolted them both out of their banter, and her roommate belted from the other side, “oi, lovebirds! we’re all going to get breakfast, want to come with?”

she looked expectantly at toji, who shrugged and mouthed ‘sure’, and answered back, “yeah, be out in a sec!”

“lovebirds, huh?” toji mumbled, as he intertwined their fingers, the corner of his lip curling upwards.

oh, angels in heaven above…

“shut up.”

| Φ |

the month of june was of blue skies and scorching pavements. of far too many melted vanilla and matcha ice-creams dripping onto their clothes. of heat mirages and the cool, sweet relief of air-conditioned cafes and shopping malls. of lying on dried-out, yellowed grass at night, their sweaty hands firmly holding each other, while looking up at the midnight sky and divulging all their deepest secrets.

it was when she learned how toji got the scar on his lip.

he was twiddling with the hem of her baby pink t-shirt, and not quite looking at her. “my cousins used to bully me when i was a kid,” he admitted quietly.

her gaze snapped over to him, soul aching for him. “toji, that’s awful. did you tell anyone?”

toji shook his head, trailing a finger up and down her bare arm. “my parents kinda dismissed it like it wasn’t happening. i think they didn’t want to stir things within the family, even when the fuckers took it too far one day and caused this." he paused, voiced tinged with bitterness. "they held me down and threatened me with razor blades, and one of 'em accidentally slipped."

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered, not knowing quite else to say, and then rolled over onto her side to face him.

“it’s alright, i’m over it,” toji mumbled, returning to lying on his back, his arm behind his head. “but it’s why i've been studying so hard, so i can get the hell out of here. my family lives quite close by, you see.”

“right, and tokyo is about as far away as you can get.”

“yeah, pretty much.”

“and that’s why you didn’t speak to anyone at uni. you knew you'd just be moving on anyways, so there was no point making friends."

“mhm.”

she chewed the inside of her cheek. “so, what made me different?”

toji turned his head to face her, his gaze holding a gentleness she'd never seen before, “because… you’re you,” he said, as if that alone would explain everything.

she looked away, staring up at the sky again. it was silent for some time before she finally asked, “have i ever explained what quantum entanglement is to you before?”

“no, don’t think so, but go on.”

“it’s when two particles are so deeply connected, that it doesn’t matter even if they’re separated. the connection will always be there, and they’ll always affect each other. the distance between them doesn't matter either, because they still belong to each other.”

toji was quiet for a long time, and she wondered if he understood the deeper meaning behind what she was actually trying to say. she had never explicitly said to him that she loved him, and perhaps this was the only way she could say it - in the only way she knew how to. it was too late to turn back now anyway.

suddenly, he pushed his upper body off the ground and sat upwards, his back turned to her. he was breathing fast, too fast, and her heart started to beat frantically.

“toji?” she called out, fear lacing her words, her heart breaking in two at the mere thought of him rejecting all of this this – rejecting her.

toji turned to her, and whispered with glossy eyes, his words almost barely audible, “it’s you. it’s you. it’s you, and i love you.”

with that, he practically fell on top of her, their lips finally meeting in what seemed like an inevitable occurrence. like an eclipse or the death of a star, but none of that mattered. because here she was, with toji fushiguro, and he loved her.

he loved her, as her lips parted for him and their tongues swirled together, and she thought he tasted of vanilla.

she loved him, as he tenderly held the back of her head, and she melted into him like the ice creams they savoured every day.

they loved each other, as their hands dipped underneath their shirts, exploring the dips and valleys of each other's bodies.

the universe was never more perfect than in that very moment.

| Φ |

the very next week, they went on their first official date.

“i’ll swing by your place at eight o’clock, is that okay?” toji asked her over the phone, as she lazed about in her bed in a dream-like, rosy trance.

she hummed, rolling onto her back and kicking her legs in the air. “sure. what are we doing?”

“never you mind your brilliant little head about it. just be ready, okay?”

“hehe, okay.”

“okay, i’ll see you later… i love you.”

“i love you too.”

with that, he ended the call, and she was left counting down the hours until she would see him. she got ready in good time, being careful to shave every bit of hair on her body, using her roommate's products that she’d left behind after moving out. not that she even thought they would be doing something like that, at least not until she had seen a box of condoms under the bathroom sink cabinet. she hadn’t thought of sex since her subpar experience with it during her first year, and had since locked it out of her mind.

and now, it was all she could think about.

just after eight p.m., there was a prompt knock on the door, and she breathed out shakily before opened it. and there was her boy, her toji, holding a bouquet of half a dozen red roses, with a blush gracing his cheeks nearly as colorful as the flowers.

“hey,” he greeted with a handsome, crooked smile, his eyes sweeping up and down her figure. “you look beautiful. i hope you like italian food.”

and all her bundle of nerves dissipated. “yeah,” she replied breathlessly. “i do.”

toji took her to a small restaurant not too far from her dorm, about a fifteen-minute walk away. it was quirky, designed really for students with not much money in their pockets, but it was just perfect. it was natural, the way it was always meant to be. with her sitting there in a dainty summer dress, while toji, in his usual black t-shirt and jeans, looked at her like she was his whole universe.

after they were done with their meal, he’d shooed her away from even trying to pay for the bill, which he paid for in battered notes and loose change. then, they walked hand in hand in the warm summer breeze back to her dorm. she was going on excitedly about how she was looking for internships at various firms in tokyo, and toji was smiling as he listened to her finally start to figure out the answers to her future equation.

though, maybe not just her future.

they finally entered the safe space of her dorm, her roommates absence filling it with a sad eeriness. she looked at him shyly, fiddling with her fingers behind her back, and asked, “you want some tea?”

toji hummed, taking his shoes off at the door. “sure, thanks.”

she was grateful he said yes; it gave her something to do with her hands. she reached upwards to the cabinet to grab their mugs. the two twin beige, somewhat grey, mugs that always sat beside each other. they clinked loudly against the counter, and she flicked the kettle on.

and then, toji’s warm hands were on her hips, and her mind went blank.

“i love you,” he mumbled, his lips soft and wet as they trailed against the curve of her neck. “you’re my star, and i love you.”

he was repeating ‘i love you’ like a mantra he couldn’t quite believe was true, and even a part of her was still amazed that it actually was. she turned to face him, tea well forgotten about, and wrapped her arms around his neck to place her lips between his plush ones. toji hummed into her mouth, his hands sliding down to gently grip her behind, pulling her closer into him.

it was a nebula explosion after that, a stumbling mess of them making their way to her bedroom with their lips interlocked, bodies pressed close together as they ripped their clothes off each other. giggling like naughty children when she struggled to tug her dress off.

“you’re hopeless,” toji groaned playfully, tapping her nose with his finger, before smoothly sliding her dress from her body.

she pouted, crossing her arms over her bare chest. “am not.”

he shushed her softly, pulling her into him once more in a fiery kiss, and they fell gently onto the bed. toji kneaded her breasts, eliciting a moan from her as his mouth traveled slowly from her lips, down to her neck and caressing her collarbone, flicking her hard nipple with his tongue.

“hmm, you feelin good, baby?” toji murmured, looking up at her with hooded lids, forest eyes blazing with desire reserved just for her. “not too much?”

"n-no," she stuttered, fisting his black locks between her fingers, scratching the back of his scalp and making him groan.

toji parted his lips, his breath blowing softly and tickling her nipple, and she shivered and slightly arched her back in anticipation. he teased her with his tongue, licking her hard bud with a featherlight touch, and she gasped, “toji, please.”

with that, he took her nipple in his mouth, steaming hot and so wet as his tongue swirled around it. she moaned loudly, arching herself into his body, and he placed a strong hand on the small of her back to pull her in.

she thought that if toji pulled her in any closer, they would surely melt into each other and become one.

her legs parted of their own accord, and her hips were pure instinct as she ground her slick pussy on his thigh, the ridges of the powerful muscle stimulating her perfectly and sending jolts of pleasure through her core. toji smiled against her nipple, giving it one last suck, let it go with an audible pop! and traveled back up to her face, his lips brushing hers.

“who knew,” he whispered, pressing soft kisses along the bridge of her nose. “that all this would happen from drinking green tea.”

she giggled, and held his face in her hands, bringing his lips back home to hers. “i need you, toji,” she breathed out, breaking their kiss. “can i have you?”

toji smiled, touched his forehead to hers and murmured, “you can always have me, sweetheart. tell me what you want.”

“i want you in me,” she begged, her arousal making her more desperate by the second. “i’m yours, toji. make me yours.”

he snapped.

his lips captured hers once more in a searing kiss so molten hot, she was sure she would burn and be consumed by his fire. toji’s hands moved down to himself, freeing his hard cock from his boxers with a tiny slap noise as it hit against her lower stomach. he pressed his hips into her and settled in between her legs, his hard and flushed dick feeling even hotter against her skin than his lips did.

toji moved his hips, his cock wetting against her folds, the slick sounds lewd and utterly intoxicating, as he pushed further into her with every back and forth motion.

further.

and further.

she moaned loudly as he finally sunk deep into her wet walls, painfully slow and deliciously agonising.

“oh, fuck baby,” toji groaned, his face in her neck, as he buried himself to the hilt. “you’re -ah!- so fuckin beautiful. my beautiful girl.”

her nails dug into his shoulder, and toji bent her legs to fold them, rutting further into her. she whined at the deeper connection, feeling his cock flex inside her. he stilled with their chests pressed tightly together, and she could feel his heart pumping hard.

“t-toji,” she gasped, throwing her head back as she felt his balls against the curve of her ass, the tip of his dick rubbing against that spongy spot that made her see stars behind her eyelids.

he started shallowly thrusting, deliberately slow, holding her head so lovingly she felt she was going to burst. this was heaven, she thought, toji was heaven – her phi. the golden ratio, found in all remarkable and beautiful things on the planet. all her life, all the combinations of numbers, formulas, and sequences had to have been carefully calculated to lead up to him, to this moment.

toji sucked and kissed just below her ear, his muscled thighs flexing as he increased the pace just a fraction, and she clenched around him as she felt the veins of his cock rubbing exquisitely inside her. she tightly squeezed his bicep as the sounds of her squelching pussy and slapping of their bodies filled the room, and the smell of sex and toji filled her nose.

“look at us,” he cooed, stroking her cheek. “makin such a mess on your bed.”

she looked down to the interconnected bodies, a ring of white cream at the base of toji’s cock pumping in and out of her, dripping down onto a damp spot on the bedsheets underneath them. his toned abs had a thin sheen of sweat, and they flexed and rippled as he really started to pound into her. her pussy clenched around him again at the thought of him chasing his pleasure high from her body. she kissed him fervently, and he moaned into her mouth. toji’s balls were tightening, and her orgasm was exponentially building, like the pressure of boiling water molecules hitting the walls of a sealed container.

“let go, baby” toji murmured huskily, his hips snapping at an even faster pace. “let go.”

and she did, throwing her head back and almost screaming as her legs shook violently.

a supernova imploded somewhere at the other end of a distant universe. stars flew across the blackness behind her squeezed-shut eyelids, leaving behind a glittering trail of stardust. toji groaned into her neck, and she felt hot ropes of his cum spurt against her walls, his legs the only thing powering his body through his high.

she wrapped her arms around his neck as he stilled, half-hard cock still plugged inside her, panting into each other as their shared sweat made them stick to each other.

“i love you,” toji whispered, full of reverence and life.

she kissed him softly, rubbing their noses together. “i love you too.”

| Φ |

it was early july now; their results had been released, and graduations were finally right around the corner.

“you should go toji!” she exclaimed, cupping her mug of lukewarm tea with both hands, watching intently from the sofa as he did some stretches. “you’ve worked so hard for this.”

he grunted, but from effort or annoyance, she didn’t know. “i can’t be bothered, seriously, and i’m not interested in standing on a stage and be the only person without parents cheering them on.”

she didn’t press it further, casting one last longing look at his muscles rippling as he stretched, and resumed looking through internship advertisements on her laptop. they had settled into an oddly domestic routine for the past few weeks. she would work in the cafe during the day, while toji trained at the gym. he would swing by and pick her up as she finished work in the early afternoon, and they would cook dinner and hang around the dorm. the weather was getting far too hot for leisurely walks during the day, so they had mostly passed that time making love and talking about everything and nothing.

toji kissed the top of her head, squatting behind her and clearly finished with his stretches, his eyes skimming over the current tab open on her laptop. “still nothin, baby?”

she sighed, rubbing his hand that was gently massaging her shoulder. “no.”

“you’ll find something, don’t worry. it’ll happen. let’s just focus on celebrating your graduation next week.”

her graduation.

she still couldn’t believe it. next week, she would be graduating, and the week after that, saying goodbye to her accommodation – her home – for the last three years of her life. saying farewell to her manager and the little cafe that had been so good to her, and not just because it had brought her and toji together. the stress was mounting to find something, anything, in tokyo, because she refused to even entertain the idea of going backwards and returning home.

and because she absolutely could not bear to be so far away from toji either, the thought alone was soul-crushing.

she heard the shower faucet running in the bathroom, and a wave of loneliness hit her. why exactly, she wasn’t sure, but she chased after toji into the bathroom.

he stared as she burst in, brow raised in startled confusion as soap suds ran down his face and back. “what? you find somethin?”

clothes be damned, she stepped into the shower and kissed him with all the energy and emotion she could muster. toji was taken aback for a second, hesitatingly circling his arms around her, and then giving into her.

she then decided; she would rather her body combust, and all her atoms disperse into the atmosphere before even trying to live without toji fushiguro.

| Φ |

it was the night before her graduation, and she was a nervous wreck.

“oh, toji,” she gushed, dipping the razor she was holding into a bowl of soapy water and giving it a little shake. “i hate getting up in front of people. i might just not go. it doesn’t really matter anyway, does it?”

toji hummed, brows furrowed at her, but remained unable to respond unless he wanted to get soap in his mouth. she flicked the excess water from the razor and carefully shaved underneath toji’s chin. he’d really let his stubble grow out, and since he was adamant about attending her graduation, it meant that the scruff would just have to go.

“nugh- y’re goin,” toji mumbled through pursed lips. “y’re too shmart t'not go.”

“and you’re too smart to have missed yours, but here we are,” she retorted, her tongue poking out from the side of her lip in concentration. “now stop talking, or you’ll get cut.”

toji grumbled and huffed from his nose, sending a soap sud flying onto her bare arm, and he snorted in amusement. she was sat on top of the kitchen counter next to the sink, with toji standing in between her legs, his hands kneading her plush thighs every so often. she was deep in thought, going through her mental checklist of everything she needed to prepare for tomorrow morning.

her light green kimono for the ceremony was already laid out on her roommate's old bed, zori shoes and tabi socks neatly placed beside it. but her hair pins and accessories still needed to be picked out, and she hadn’t even decided on a-

“ow, fuck!”

she snapped out of her thoughts as toji hissed in pain, ruby-red pearls of blood already blooming from his lip.

oh no…

please god, no...

she’d cut his scar, reopening the top layer of delicate flesh.

“toji! fuck, i’m sorry,” she panicked, as he pulled away from her in a flash, his fingers pressing down on his lip. “i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to!

she slid off the counter, immediately trying to go over and help him, but toji practically growled, “don’t fucking touch me.”

her body froze, a cold shock of dread spreading from her head straight down to her stomach where it pooled uncomfortably. “toji?” she called out, her heart cracking and lip quivering. “it’s me. it’s only me.”

she’d never seen him like this before, backed up against the wall like an injured animal, his green eyes widened, breathing quickened, and nostrils flared, as if he was about to lash out at anything and everything. he met her worried gaze, and there was nothing but coldness and emptiness. there was no trace of the boy she knew and loved. “oh, toji. please,” she begged, fat droplets of tears running down the apples of her cheeks. "let me help you."

toji madly scrambled away, grabbing his shoes, and was out the door as if he’d never been there to begin with.

| Φ |

toji never came home last night.

she’d fallen asleep on the sofa, after calling him numerous times with no answer, waiting for him to walk back through the door until she couldn’t possibly keep her eyes open any longer. when she woke up groggily, her eyes still heavy from sleep and crying, she went about the arduous task of getting herself ready for graduation.

she hoped, no, prayed to the angels solving her equation to apply a magic formula that would bring toji back to her. she had to believe he would show up to the ceremony; he just had to show. she didn’t even want to think about trying to calculate for the probability of him not showing up. the day past in a hazy, slow blur of camera flashes, ostentatious flower bouquets, and toothy grins of parents and graduates. she played the part perfectly, a walking empty shell of a human, hugging and smiling with her loved ones. when her name was called to receive her diploma, nothing else mattered except trying to catch a glimpse of toji’s face in the audience.

but she couldn’t see him, and a foolish part of her hoped that he was simply standing right at the back, wearing that soft smile she loved so much whenever he looked at her.

she eventually returned back to her dorm in a numb daze, blinking slowly as her eyes swept over her soon-to-be-old home.

there was no trace of toji.

not his black sliders by the door.

not his toothbrush in the holder in the bathroom.

not his canvas bag or dirty gym clothes in the washing basket.

nothing at all.

she collapsed to the floor in a heap, her hands shakily procuring her phone from her clutch purse, and dialled toji’s number.

beep. beep. beep.

“sorry, but the number you have called does not exist. ple-”

she snapped her phone shut, and hoped that her angels could hear the gut-wrenching scream that clawed its way out of her throat and reverberated around the empty walls of the dorm.

| Φ |

the first law of thermodynamics states that energy could never be created or destroyed, only changing from one form to another.

she thought of that as she remained curled into a fetal position on the cold, hard tiles, teeth chattering and the very marrow of her bones frozen solid. her fingernails had dug crescent moons into her palm, so hard she surely must have bled by now, but she didn’t care. her heart was tearing itself apart, a war of muscle and heartstrings against merciless, cruel love clashing inside of her chest.

her energy, what was it? was it inherently love? for perhaps the numbers and greek letters she had puzzled over for hours on end, contemplating all of the universe's workings and mysteries. or was it for toji fushiguro? for the dark-haired boy who had taught to her love something else other than her calculations and green tea. to love life and all the little joys that came along with it, and that she was worth so much more than she gave herself credit for.

if her energy was love, then what was it going to change into?

hate or rage? both? maybe the angels would mercifully apply the catastrophic formula of death instead, proving her equation to be null and false, and her body would dissolve back into dust and atoms. atoms that would find their way back to toji, hovering so closely to him, but never touching him again. would his body know hers, even if he could never hope to see her? would he sense her and smile, and remember the quiet, young love they had once shared?

her teeth clattered loudly, and her arms disappeared into the sleeves of her kimono.

how strange, she thought, that the music was the loudest it had ever been.

scratching of quills.

a splash of ink and a teardrop.

and the scroll was flipped over to a blank side.

| Φ |

general taglist: @tadabzzzbee

toji brainrot tag <3: @dollsuguru

#jujutsu kaisen #toji x reader #toji fushiguro x reader #toji x y/n #jjk toji #toji fushiguro #toji zenin #toji x you #fushiguro toji #toji fluff #toji angst #toji smut #jjk oneshot #jjk angst #jjk fluff #jjk smut #jjk au #jjk x reader #metanoia #my writing

[bllk-after-dark]

wildest fantasies.

pairing. itoshi rin, shidou ryusei, karasu tabito, otoya eita, yukimiya kenyu, nagi seishiro x f!reader

content warnings. MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI, nsfw, how the top 6 imagine fucking you, dom!character x sub!reader, vary in each installment, some are prevalent than others (oops), written in lowercase

itoshi rin. breeding kink, creampie, degradation, edging, fingering, jealousy, marking, possessive behavior, wall sex

mine is written on your skin with invisible ink. he fumes at a player from his team talking to you, who seems to be having fun when he sees you laugh. he doesn’t experience rage quite often, but that guy is the initial point and gets worse when the poster boy of blue lock strikes up a conversation with you.

“what’s with the silent treatment, rin?” you become frustrated over the lack of dialogue. the entire ride on the way home was tense and he treated you like a ghost. he also feels the same, but for different reasons. as the two of you enter your house, he pins you to the door with both arms above your head and cunt on his knee. you attempt to focus on lust in his eyes as his tongue battles against yours and teeth nips at your throat to leave bruises in its wake.

“craving attention from him out of all people, hm? fucking slut.” you gasp at the sharp friction of his knee against your cunt. he isn’t this rough and riled up, not that you’re complaining. he slips his fingers inside, pumping them in and out very slowly as punishment. “think he can fuck you like this? lukewarm, want him and everyone else to know that you’re mine.”

to prolong this type of behavior, you instill delicious images in his head. “how are you gonna show me off? the hickeys, sure. but what about a ring on my finger? your cum dripped out of me? or perhaps a baby in me?”

he pulls his fingers out when you’re nearing an orgasm, leaving you a whining mess. the impulse to buy a fancy ring with his salary and propose to you live, to fuck you in the locker rooms to see copious amounts of cum staining your underwear, and to fuck you enough to make you pregnant so that damn golden boy can mind his own business — which he’ll gladly make it happen. he rams his cock in you without warning and spends the entire day in the bedroom to make sure it takes.  

“ah, there you are. i had to ask one of your teammates, but we lost track.” he’s back in the stadium, dazed from his daydreaming. you didn’t notice him blanking out as you’re busy geeking out about his plays. “watching a match in-person was so exciting! i get to see you steal a ball by kicking it between another player’s legs and score a goal with a direct shot— is that it? whatever, you’re so cool, rin!”

he shuts you up by kissing you, and everyone in the stadium reacts in a domino effect. the cameras pan to the two of you so it’s on live television, his fans freak out that he’s actually in a relationship, and his teammates — specifically that guy — are in pure disbelief. you wonder why he had done that, but he looks proud so you didn’t pry any further. “there. now the whole world knows.”

shidou ryusei. anal sex, blowjob, cuckolding, exhibitionism, face fucking, impact play (spanking), shower sex

demon is what everyone refers to him as. known to be vicious in the field, people hate to admit that he’s a damn good player. aside from being skilled at soccer, he’s also skilled at pulling risque acts in the context of yourself — willing to let the whole world know how tight you are. right now he’s fucking you from behind in the shower with hands on the wall and back slightly bent to stabilize yourself from his powerful thrusts.

“shit, you’re even tighter than yesterday!” he howls as his thick and wide cock drags along your walls and slaps your ass multiple times, leaving a red handprint there. this is a position favored by the both of you, and it never gets old. although, you do want to try out other things that you and he can find exciting. what he says afterwards is an adventure you can’t wait to embark on.

“i wonder if eyelashes will agree with me. how about we invite him someday?” you’d like that very much, honored to be acknowledged as a favorite pastime by the best player in japan. for now you want to practice sucking your boyfriend off, so you detach from him and kneel in front of his dick, lapping the bulbous tip with your tongue.

“holy shit, you’re tight here too! fucking hell… i dunno which one i like more but let’s find out, hm?” he shoves his cock deep into your throat and grips your head as he bucks his hips, eyes rolling to the back of his skull at how stimulating it is.

“feeling so fucking good. looking so fucking good, too. i bet you’ll do even better at the shower stalls in the locker rooms. or at a bar. or at an alley. or—” it’s incredible how he manages to talk about his shameless ideas when he’s at the verge of cumming whereas on the other hand you phased out. streams of opaque white gush out past your lips and trickle down your chin. his dick is still hard, meaning he’s ready for another round. his stamina is inhuman, like a demon. but knowing him, he won’t be satisfied until he has tried out every single thing on his growing list.

“can’t believe you took a nap during our bath. was expecting you to be more awake from the bath bomb i bought, but i guess not.” he’s greeted with a sweet peck, eyes fluttering halfway but can see you beaming at him brightly like the lights in the room. “got your towel here. now i have to drain the water, so shoo.”

he wraps his towel around his waist and then observes you unplug the drain. he happens to sneak a peek at the curve of your ass when you bend over to reach it, smug at how he happens to catch wind of how glorious the view is. he startles you by pinching the fat of your cheeks, and you turn to him, completely flustered. “what? want me to do it again?”

karasu tabito. aftercare, hand holding/kissing, insecurities, loss of virginity, missionary, petnames (baby), praise

sorry is your automatic reply when he hints that he wants to have sex. you’re a virgin; the thought of being unable to satisfy someone, especially one experienced such as himself, is deeply rooted in your head. on the contrary, it’s a huge turn on. since it’s your first time, he wants to make it extra special. it makes him more excited than he should be so he tries to tone it down to not scare you.

he reaches for your face, staring at him like a lost puppy. he smirks at how entranced you are when his fingers slide to your chin then glide over your lips. he kisses you hard, taking your breath away as he gently pushes you down on the bed. he gives you time to breathe while he takes off his shirt. you looking intently on him makes his heart flutter, that his body is for your eyes only.

“i’m okay. you can keep going,” you tell him when he checks up on you. with the slight encouragement of his hand drawing circles on your skin, you take off your shirt as well so he can explore more of your body. the two of you eventually strip yourselves to bareness in the midst of devouring each other with tongue and spit.

“squeeze if you want me to stop.” your hand is intertwined with his, ready to signal for the sake of your safety. he slowly penetrates you, his cock buried to the hilt inside your pussy. he blabbers about how you’re taking him so well, swearing he’ll cum faster than expected. he hooks a leg on his shoulder which allows him to thrust into you harder and deeper. the pitch of your voice rises higher and higher, you pull him toward your mouth to crash your lips against his. you hate how you sound it seems, but rest assured, it tells him that he has done his job right.

“shit, baby. you’re so perfect for me. how is this possible— agh,” he hisses out as he spills inside you. you’ve gone exhausted afterwards, skin sensitive from the caresses on your curves and kisses on your hands. this is what he’d like to happen, but the next time he blinks, you’re lying beside him fully clothed, meaning that the scenario is anything but real.

“tabito? you’re not saying anything.” you avert your gaze from his. you’re ashamed of literally pushing him away, believing that he’ll take offense judging from his silence. “i didn’t mean to do that. it happened so fast that i freaked out. can we start over and… start a little bit slower?”  

“sure. let’s take things slow, then.” he kisses your forehead as a way to reassure you that you haven’t done anything wrong. somehow it makes you bolder, being the one to initiate the kiss while sneaking your hands under his shirt unconsciously. you immediately retract from the sudden move and are about to apologize for acting out of the blue. he cuts off a smile, gesturing you to keep on going. he’s so weak for you, and he’ll do anything to make you happy.

otoya eita. begging, cunnilingus, mutual masturbation, nipple play, phone sex, toxic relationships (with reader’s ex)

relief washes over him hearing that you broke up with your former significant other through the phone. he never liked them to begin with and doesn’t understand what you see in them. being the good friend he is, he wants what's best for you. yet he decides to remain civil, albeit painfully. though, it’s not as painful as suppressing his sinful thoughts about you crumbling under touch.

“eita? can you do me a favor?” he loves your voice, but you saying his name is his greatest weakness. instead of heading it wirelessly, he’d prefer you moaning it in his ears when he’s railing you into a begging mess. he should feel guilty for harboring these feelings as he promised to play the ‘good friend’ role. but promises are meant to be broken anyway. “can you make me forget about them?”

the lines of friendship blur into indescribable tension. you express your frustration over the shitty quality of your sex life your former partner provided, rambling about how badly you want to be fucked on someone’s mouth. the cries of your nipples and clit aching to be touched causes his cock to strain in his pants. sex isn’t a topic you confide in with your friends, especially your male friends, but now it doesn’t matter. you called him to forget after all.

“to tell you the truth, you’ve been driving me crazy,” he sighs with his head leaned back as he pumps his length. labored breaths and whimpers are heard on your end; it seems you have the same idea. “so you want me to make you forget? what if i tell you i’m jerking off right now, wishing that i was inside that pretty pussy of yours? what about you, wishing that my mouth is there too and on your pretty tits to claim what has been mine in the first place?”

“i’m yours, always yours. please, faster!” your whines become more frequent that he cums on his hand and some on his thighs. he leans against the headboard, catching his breath alongside you. if you’re here, he’d leave more proof that you’re forever his with no room for your ex in your world as it should. yet it’s all white noise. the entire time he has been blanking out, so you were waiting for an eternity for him to say something.

“hello? earth to eita?” he snaps back to reality. the only real thing is the stickiness of his hand that’s covered in cum, so he really has been mindlessly jacking off to your voice. “i asked if you can do me a favor but i think i rather stop by your place to cool off. is it okay if i come over?”

“yeah, sure.” you thank him before hanging up. he tosses his phone to the edge of the bed, contemplating what he has done. never, ever again will he do this and vows to not speak on it. all he can do is to stick being the ‘good friend’ to comfort you through your breakup. he’ll do whatever it takes to prove he’s the better choice. they’ll be the day where you’re all his for the taking.

yukimiya kenyu. body worship, mirror sex, lap dancing, lingerie, riding, sex toys, strip tease, voyeurism

risk is his middle name. not only taking it to become the top striker in japan, but in the context of having strong urges to impale you on him. it’s confined in his pants, just like how his hands are confined to his sides. he’s restricted to ogle at your body clad in lace lingerie, attempting to tempt him to give into his desires with your alluring expressions.

the lingerie surprise tips him over the edge. he follows your fingers running down your breasts to your clit, agonized by the drag of one of them along the lips back and forth. he grips his seat to the point where he can almost break the bones of his hands. oh how badly he wants you, but being the menace you are, you keep insisting to stay patient until the end of your performance.

“mmm, not yet. keep your eyes on me,” you giggle, lifting his chin to face you with your mouth ghosting over his. you’re enjoying the sight way too much, but how can he also feel the same when you’re torturing him with the sway of your hips on his lap, the flex of your muscles when he glances at the many mirrors around him, and the teasing of your bra straps down past your shoulders? and when you also grind on his bulge along with a vibrator plugging in you which is your source of pleasure instead?

as if his body has a mind of its own, he finds himself dancing with you with an arm wrapped around your waist and the other cradling your head, kissing you with his life. then clothes start to fly off left and right. he yanks out your vibrator decorated with your slick and plunges you onto his throbbing cock, having you seated for his part of the performance. oh how the tables have turned; now you’re the one being tortured, pounded with quick upward thrusts from him.

“now for the grand finale.” despite your protests to slow down, he wants to relish your face and body contorting in pleasure through the mirror beside him. a multitude of thrusts later, he reaches his climax and feels your walls clench to make sure you didn’t miss a single drop. it’s a shame that time goes by so fast, because he sure wants to see your body arch for him over and over again.

“you know, it’s rude to stare without saying anything.” loud noises flood his ears. he’s in the mall on a shopping spree with you to help you pick out new clothes to spice up your wardrobe. although when you mean by ‘spice up’, he doesn’t expect to see you in lace lingerie at the fitting rooms. “so, uh… what do you think?”

he has speculations on whether you may have a hidden agenda to seduce him or just trying it out for fun. but all he do is marvel at how the lingerie fits nicely on your body, making you nervous. an idea pops into his head and whispers into the shell of your ear. “not sure. why don’t you buy and put it on tonight for me so i can see it better, hm?”

nagi seishiro. bulge kink, cockwarming, size difference (reader is implied to be smaller), somnophilia, spooning

warm is his favorite sensation when he’s curled up with you in bed. his chest is on your back and his left arm hugs your corresponding side while the other engulfs your right hand. his cock throbs inside you which can be seen poking your stomach, making him curse and groan as he places his hand there. the feeling is delicious, addicting even, and he’s hungry for more.

he pants against your neck as he lazily thrusts against your ass, the outline of the bulge moving up and down from what he can feel on his hand. so good, he chokes out in your ear, followed by a string of fucks and moans. that manages to wake you up, having you grab on the sheets from being overwhelmed by the pleasure from behind.

“sei…” his impatience causes your breath to hitch. at that moment you’re losing your damn mind upon his balls coming into contact with your skin. “fill me up…”

as he shushes you to go back to sleep, he kisses the junction of your neck and shoulder and hooks a leg over your waist for better access to pick up the pace to fulfill your wish. “mm, yeah. gonna make you so warm and full of me.”

“hm, sei?” the morning light seeps through the blinds, spotlighting on you who’s sitting up on his bed stretching. for some reason, you press your butt against his groin which is painfully— oh. “um, did you get hard from sleeping with me last night?”

it’s a dream after all. he throws the blanket over his head and turns away from you, refusing to answer as it’ll be bothersome to explain in detail. you dismiss his silence with ‘okay’ and by telling him you have to go to work. when you reach the edge of the bed, he pins you down with his arm around your waist and drags you closer to him.

“stay with me. just a bit longer.” you cave into his whims, deciding to indulge him during then by pulling your pants down to take his huge length. it somehow knocks you out, and he hopes that you’ll forgive him for making you late. but you’re so warm and so good, just like in his dreams.

vera. ayo, finally i posted something. it’s my first time writing smut and i died inside. as expected: it’s 10% smut, 90% cringe. the top 6 has me in a chokehold and i’m not okay.

#blue lock #blue lock x reader #blue lock x female reader #blue lock smut #itoshi rin x reader #shidou ryuusei x reader #karasu tabito x reader #otoya eita x reader #yukimiya kenyu x reader #nagi seishiro x reader #itoshi rin x female reader #shidou ryuusei x female reader #karasu tabito x female reader #otoya eita x female reader #yukimiya kenyu x female reader #nagi seishiro x female reader #itoshi rin smut #shidou ryuusei smut #karasu tabito smut #otoya eita smut #yukimiya kenyu smut #nagi seishiro smut #↝ vera ✨

[ozarkthedog]

summary — Chris needs help applying his sun tan oil.

warnings — DBF!Chris Evans x afab!reader. age gap. dirty talk. hand job. face sitting. oral sex (f). fingering. squirting. light spit play. light spanking. light cum play. the usual filth. chris evans looking like this ☝️ no beta.

word count — 2.1K

author’s note — we were all affected by the “SMA” shoot. this is where my mind went. 😏

☽ 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭 ♁ 𝐎𝐳𝐳𝐢𝐞'𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲 ☾

— 𝟏𝟖+ 𝐎𝐧𝐥𝐲 - 𝐌𝐃𝐍𝐈. — 𝐈 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝/𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦. 𝐑𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐬 & 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝!

“Hey, pretty girl. How’s it going?” Chris asks swimming over to the edge of his massive inground pool. 

You drop your things on one of the lounge chairs and stretch your arms over your head, “Oh you know, same old, same old.” You chuckle, grateful to unwind after a long day of job hunting.

Having just completed your third college semester, you enjoyed the sanctuary his backyard lent you. Filled with various palms and vegetation, a trickling waterfall, and the stacked bar, it was heaven on earth.

Chris was one of your dad’s closest (and most handsome) friends. Only recently had you gotten to know him, bonding over a silly meme one night at a party and from there he became a part of your life. 

He allowed you to come over whenever you wanted as long as you gave him a heads up. “You know, just in case I have any…,” His lips pull into a smirk when he sneaks a glimpse over the rim of his sunglasses at your curves. “Women friends spending the night.”

The crystal blue water ripples as he swims another lap across the pool. This is one of the many activities he uses to stay in shape aside from one particular, salacious activity. His words, not yours.

You walk to the edge of the glistening pool and dip your toes in. It’s cool and refreshing, and the tattooed man makes it feel that much better.

After a final lap, he rises from the pool like a Greek god. 

Water drips down his immaculate body, curving over the taut muscles. His tiny, barely there swim trunks could easily be mistaken for boxer briefs they were so tight.

You clench your jaw from dropping at the wicked sight.

He pads to your left, splashing you with a bit of water as he reaches for a towel. “Oops. Sorry.” It lacks sincerity but you could care less.

His muscles bounce with every swipe of the towel as he dries himself off. 

“I’m gonna lie out for a bit.” He nods towards the lounge before reaching for the tanning oil.  

That golden chain bounces against his hairy, inked chest and his intimidating package bulges with every step as he makes his way around the pool.

You try to distract yourself as you sit on the pool edge and stare at your reflection before kicking it away. You’d only been in his presence less than 5 minutes and already you can’t stop yourself from being pulled in his direction.

He makes sure to catch your eye when he slathers his muscles in tanning oil. Slowly rubbing his hands over every inch of his expansive chest and rippling torso. Putting on a show that would be illegal if he wasn’t in the comfort of his own backyard.

You squirm against the heated concrete as he holds your gaze with a smirk. Your core clenches hard when he slides his slippery fingers down the v cut of his hips and pushes the thin briefs down a bit further.

He’s got a small tattoo at the base of his hips and thick auburn hair circles the beginning of what looks like a well endowed cock.

Your mind swirls with heady arousal making you feel faint.

“Hey, Sweetheart,” he calls out, grinning when you jolt from your horny stupor. “Help me get my back?”

You hesitantly push to your feet and walk over to the hulk of a man as he tosses you the bottle. 

“Rub a generous layer on, please.” He requests, turning away and giving you a clear view of his sculpted back. You swallow the lump in your throat and pour the liquid into your palms.

You smooth the oil along his shapely shoulders, down his spine, and slowly massage the ornate muscles.

“Damn that feels good. Your hands are so soft, Sweetheart.” 

You’re a mess. Between the praise and being able to rub your hands all over his back, it’s no wonder you’re in ruins. 

Chris turns around after you smooth the final layer on his freckled skin and you feel an imaginary punch hit you sqaure in the belly.

His once tight swim trunks are now extremely and overtly tight as his cock throbs, pushing against the thin material with a twitch.

You avert your eyes, looking anywhere but the enormous package that’s aching to be released. 

“Ah, yeah, that happens when pretty girls touch me.” He plays it cool and sits down on the lounge chair, stretching his limbs with a sigh. 

You fidget with the oil still smeared on your hands unsure of what to do with the mess until you spot his towel. 

“Ah ah,” Chris chides with a raised brow. “That’s a waste of good oil.” 

His head drops to his chest and his eyes flick from his straining swim trucks up to your dazed eyes. “I think you could put your hands to good use.” 

Heat burns your cheeks at the insinuation. “Really? Is that such a good idea?” You teethe your lip nervously. 

“Come on, bein’ a goodie two shoes is overrated.” He says as he palms his cock with a husky groan. “It’ll be our little secret.”

How could you say no to such a tempting offer?

“‘Atta girl.” Chris praises as you sink onto the lounge next to him, pressing your thigh against his before carefully tugging the wet material down his thighs. 

His hefty cock flops against his trim belly with a dull thud, eliciting a pathetic whimper from your lips.

“See somethin’ you like, Sweetheart?”

Warmth blossoms in your chest at the nickname and sinks into the confines of your core, drowning your pussy in arousal.

He’s so unbelievably girthy. Your fingers don’t even touch as you cautiously wrap them around his cock. The bulbous crown pulses red at the tip making you lick your lips greedily. 

“Yeah, that’s it.” Chris praises, as his head falls back onto the lounge with a groan. “Up and down, milk my cock.”

You slowly swirl your grip around his length, tugging steadily and hanging on every noise that squeezes from his throat.

“God damn your hands are fuckin’ amazin’.” His brow furrows as he bites his plump bottom lip with a guttural moan.

Your core throbs, pounding like a beating heart as more slick drips into the lining of your bikini. You clamp your thighs together desperate to quell the terrible twinge that gets stronger by the second.  

“Awe. Is my pretty girl’s pussy achin’? ” Chris taunts with an exaggerated pout. “She gettin’ all wet and drippin’ for some attention?”

In a flash, he maneuvers your body so it’s laying over his. 

Your knees are propped on either side of his head while his cock stands at attention directly in front of your face. 

“Such a fine fuckin’ ass you have.” He takes a bite of your supple flesh causing you to jolt forward with a whimper from the harsh treatment. The slick tip smacks against your chin and leaves a sticky stain of precum and oil. 

“Keep goin’, Sweetheart. I’m just gonna have a taste.” 

Chris pulls the drenched lining of your bottoms to the side and growls. The basement deep vibrations rumble through your body as a strand of slick stretches with his movements until it breaks and snaps back onto your soaked core.

“Lookit’ how wet this little pussy is. You’re absolutely gushin’.” Breath fans your skin as he takes a deep whiff of your folds. 

“Fuck.” He grits his teeth and thrusts his hips toward your face, dribbling more precome down the mushroom crown. “If that’s not the sweetest smellin’ cunt.” He takes another deep breath before attaching his mouth to your cunt like a dog to a bone.

“O!” You squeal and grasp the base of his cock for leverage as his tongue dives between your weeping folds. He caresses your velvet walls and widens your convulsing channel with unmatched prowess.

A sharp blow lands on your behind. “Didn’t I say keep going?” Chris grunts, detaching from your sopping heat for a moment before diving back in.

Your mind races to catch up on the task, literally at hand, and you grasp the obscenely thick base giving it a few quick jerks. Chris groans into your flesh with every stroke of your fist. His cock throbs, steadily dribbling as you circle the reddened tip with tight swirls.   

His beard scratches your tender folds as he eats you whole, sending shocks up your spine as he sucks your clit into his mouth. He teases the tiny nub with harsh flicks and violent swipes forcing you to the edge quicker than anyone ever has before.

Your hands clutch his cock for dear life as a blinding light explodes behind your eyes.

“‘Atta girl.” Chris mumbles against your shiny core as you writhe against his face and grind on his tongue, prolonging the pleasure. 

You slump forward resting your head on one of his burly thighs to catch your breath but Chris has other plans. 

“Let’s see how messy this pussy can get.” 

Just then a thick wad of spit hits your folds. You recoil with a gasp but Chris snakes his hold even tighter around your thighs. 

“Can’t fake that innocent bullshit with me, Sweetheart. Your pussy fuckin’ clenched when I spat on it.” He deviously gloats.

Your belly flips with embarrassment but he was right. You fucking loved it.

A whine slips from your throat as you push your sticky cunt toward his face ignoring any shameful thoughts that try to surface.

“There you go. Just let me do the thinkin’.” 

Chris taps two fingers against your swollen petals before pushing them into your quivering core and pulling a desperate moan from you. 

“Stroke my cock, Sweetheart.” He commands gruffly, gliding his digits along your walls. “But remember, if you stop. I'll stop.” 

You clench around his thick fingers at the threat. With new found, albeit anxious energy, you begin stroking his cock again. His veiny girth glistens in the sunlight as you steadily pump in time with the fingers that thrust into your cunt.

“Shit– yes, such a good girl.” He locks his lips around your clit adding to the overwhelming bliss.

His fingers search out that spongy spot behind your clit as your hands milk him from base to tip, making his abs tighten with each stroke. When your cunt locks down on him, he curls his fingers and focuses all his attention on that special spot.

“Chris– oh fuck!” you cry as your core floods with slick and he shoves and twists his fingers deep inside. Your rhythm lags and you falter with slowing tugs when the rapture begins to suffocate you.

Chris ‘tuts’ and slows his fingers to the same languid pace. 

“Thought you were better than this. Thought this greedy cunt wanted to come.” he chides, smacking your ass.

A whiny apology tumbles from your lips as your pace renews and you swirl your thumb around the tip after every upward stroke. You feel him smile into your pussy, pleased with your attitude before he latches his lips around your clit once more.

Your hips drive back onto his fingers and jaw chasing your pleasure like it was the last thing on earth. His cock throbs under your touch as his own ecstasy rapidly mounts.

“I’m gonna come all over that pretty face.” He muses, lapping at the spill of arousal that drips from your core. “Mark you up real nice.” 

Your cunt flutters at his lewd statement and your hands twist faster around his length, desperate to be covered in his spend.

“Come on, Sweetheart.” Chris commands with a ragged growl, balls ready to empty. “Wanna feel how tight this cunt can get.”

Your body lurches as you come with a shout, squirting your creamy release all over his fingers and beard. 

With a gravelly groan, his sack tightens and he splashes hot waves of come across your face. Your chin, lips, and cheeks are painted in his gummy seed as he trembles beneath you while you milk his balls for every last drop. 

A few blissful moments later, he lightly smacks your thigh signaling you to move. You crawl off his body and sit at the end of the lounge while he tucks his softening cock away.

He curls a finger at you. “Come ‘ere. Let me look at you.” 

You crawl between his spread thighs as he cups your stained face in his palms. He drinks up the sight and grins deviously at you covered in his gluey white spend. 

“Gotta make sure you rub it in completely or else it won’t work.” He quips with a wink while dragging his fingers through the thick fluid and massages his sticky seed into your skin.

Your purr under his touch and flutter your lashes up at him. Maybe he was right. Being the bad girl was more fun.

anyone else want to be covered in come now??????

#chris evans #chris evans x you #chris evans x reader #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans smut

[ackerfics]

FAMILY LINE — a house of the dragon fanfiction | aegon ii targaryen x oc

act zero: the prince and the siren (wc: 1.3k) | masterlist

note: oh, and i forgot to mention, there is past daemon x oc in this oops | this is also posted on ao3

Ink on olden paper says two children were born from a great love that shook the realm.

A dragon rained fire, mountains were threatened, men were slayed — all were stepping stones to a hand being asked in marriage, to a union witnessed by the Fourteen Flames and the Seven themselves. The heavens rejoiced, sang their choruses high in the clouds bathed in ever-golden rays, as they blessed the kiss that bound their souls, bodies, and hearts into a single entity, as seen in every birth of their blood — the midnight hall shattered, igniting the spectacle of celestial bodies every pair of eyes marvelled at and years later, the most tumultuous of storms, carpeting the land with the most vibrant shade of viridian that lasted moons on end.

The Rogue Prince and The Siren of the Vale.

Daemon Targaryen and Aellara Arryn.

Every story started with a bold declaration.

For someone who loathed the jadedness of the Vale, Daemon found himself enthralled with the enigma of The Siren of the Vale who was rumoured to be the most bewitching woman to exist in this age, having only heard reminiscent tales from his good-sister, Aemma Targaryen, and songs spread from the mouths of bards. Men would trek the highest mountains to reach Eyrie in hopes of catching a single glimpse of the veiled beauty. It was the very reason why he blatantly rejected his grandmother’s impending proposal to a Bronze Bitch he wouldn’t dare touch in this lifetime, with that fucking sneer on her face as if he was the dirt and she was the god. If only he could shovel her face into the dirt and be done with it. Instead, he longed for the object of everyone’s desire, and that was the youngest child of the House that boasted a falcon for their sigil. Having The Siren by his side would surely sway the public’s favour to lean more toward his side. It would mean ensuring his place as his brother’s Heir; she is of Targaryen blood after all. To have the woman of everyone’s dreams as the Queen Consort would give him the power he never thought Daemon had, which had him singing prayers to the gods he believed in even though he wasn’t a pious man.

With no potential bride linking to him since The Good Queen Alyssane nearly betrothed him to Rhea Royce, Daemon had all the freedom a young man could ever want and need. Pleasure houses were frequented (he had more lovers than any of the noblemen combined — probably even had bastards running around), lands were flown over by the Blood Wyrm, and positions were given to him by his brother (all of which never actually reached a moon at most — fucking Hightower cunt). He had it all. But all it took was a little slip through one of the towers of Eyrie while on dragonback and he was back to the first tile.

There was no other reason for him to propose a marital union with one of the Arryn daughters than to solidify his claim on the throne.

That was all.

There was nothing captivating with the periwinkle blues owned by such a woman of ethereal enchantment. He didn’t trail his eyes from the effortless waves of her white gold hair (every piece of ornament she tangled with her tresses was pure art) down to the pleasing curves that couldn’t be concealed with her flowing dress. (It was almost like the Maiden was born in the realm; Daemon nearly groaned in front of Eyrie’s family seat). His mind wasn’t occupied with conjuring the most sinful images concerning the young woman — he didn’t picture out mapping a constellation of red peonies on her skin or tasting the drink of the gods she very much possessed. Of course, he didn’t gulp down an unnecessary collection of nervousness down his throat when she placed her godly gaze on his worshipping, undivided attention. Fuck, she was so beautiful that he was now covering his crotch with linked hands. Her father was talking yet their joined eye contact sent an impulse of static energy, just enough for The Rogue Prince to feel a jolt down his spine.

But he wasn’t the only man this ambitious to steal the Maiden from her heart and home.

“Prove that you’re devoted to taking my daughter’s hand under your protection, Your Highness. Prove that you are a worthy man of my greatest treasure.”

Bloodshed reigned; there was a battle between the suitors of Aellara Arryn. It was almost called a tourney if not for the condition that for a victor to emerge, the opponent must be decapitated and unable to make a sound except for noises of demise. And with too much blood on his hands, Daemon Targaryen walked away from the bodies as the winner, hastily taking a single stem of a sapphire rose from a jittering squire and (surprisingly) placing it behind Aellara’s right ear with the tenderness befitting a man ensnared by the most dangerous curse known to the realm (but not before making sure there wasn’t a single drop of blood on her skin; as much as he loved seeing blood on someone’s skin, it was almost a crime to see it on hers). Daemon crowned Aellara as the Queen of Love and Beauty without being told to, seven Hells, this trial for her hand in marriage wasn’t even a tourney needing a beautiful woman to be crowned. Yet he did it anyway. All to sway her to his side.

But was it really?

He found his breath hitching when Aellara smiled. It was seeing the glory of Old Valyria right in front of his eyes. His chest pounded against his will as she lifted a dainty hand, a handkerchief in between her hold, and dabbed it on one of the blood splatters on his cheek, erasing a sign of his ruthlessness with her divinity. The shade of blue owned by the rose contrasted deeply with her blonde hair, lighting up the shine innate in the periwinkle hues of her eyes. She was a fucking vision and he never desired anything more in his life until he met her.

With the Siren out of the chambers of her House’s seat, Daemon Targaryen wed Aellara Arryn at the beginning of the 105th year After the Conquest in the ways of the Seven and Old Valyria.

The premise of this romance was worthy of ballads yet it was the start of something so cruelly beautiful for one of them.

From wailing a loss of a person so dear that a large part of your soul broke away; going away because of a loved one’s exile; bearing the heir of the Prince of Dragonstone and relishing in the cocoon of appreciation in enveloped you; gaining two stolen dragon eggs for the twin babes; watching the love of your life flying to war while giving birth under the shattering night sky; suffering the betrayal of your husband’s unfaithfulness and disloyalty, breaking every bit of the vows made in front of fourteen pairs of eyes; to accepting yourself leaving this world in the same way it took your sister.

And it left behind three children with no titles, no protection, no family — it was the world against their little faces, so naive at the slimy fingers of faux niceties and always on the receiving end of reptilian smiles and hollow pity. The hourglass is letting the sand trickle in, waiting for the moment the scavengers pluck out the lingering, pulsing ache that will never be forgiven and forgotten. Because all the while The Rogue Prince created another bubble of domesticity across the seas, a son grew up too soon, a daughter stepped up to become the caretaker, and a young babe never had the chance of a complete family.

rory speaks !!

the reason why this sort-of prologue is so short despite carrying so many things is bc daemon and aellara are not the main focus of this story. i wanted to give a glimpse as to what is the nature of the main characters' parents' relationship; the main thing summarising everything is that daemon is a huge whore and is power-hungry for the title that given to him ... so, poor aellara. and having her die from childbirth is another thing to add to daemon's suffering bc this man has seen enough of it to last a lifetime (his mother, his sister-in-law, wife, and future wife; don't know how he keeps fathering children when this is what he experienced yikes). another reason why this is short is bc we're mostly seeing the events play out in the kids' (aesira, aether, aegon, and aemond; the furious ae's) eyes so, the information is limited when it reaches the twins' ears. bc let's face it, we always sugarcoat things when we tell a little bit of info to kids.

damn, and i had to post it here; let me prepare myself for the backlash woo

#— rory's passages 🌼 #— family line | hotd ☀️ #hotd #house of the dragon #hotd x oc #hotd x reader #daemon x oc #daemon targaryen x oc #daemon x reader #aegon x oc #aegon ii x oc #aegon targaryen x oc #aegon x reader #aegon targaryen x reader

[aries-writingblog]

What A Heavenly Way to Die

Summary: What a heavenly way to die? What a time to be alive? Because forever is in your eyes, but forever ain’t half the time…

Pairing: Jason Todd x reader

Word count: 912

Warnings: lot of religion probably bordering sacrilegious in this one, oops but not oops, some suggestive content, tiny portion of language

AN: little short one today but probably one of my favorites, also I didnt proofread so if there’s any mistakes, no there isn’t

Quite simply put, Jason Todd was a morning person. He enjoyed meeting dawn as she stretched and played over the landscape. Golden light bathing everything she touched. Fresh dew and a soft breeze, leading a thrilled renaissance through grasses and trees. Whisking inconsequential matters to the side. The quiet moments of serendipity, meditative and peaceful.

He liked the warmth of the sheets— the feel of skin pressed to his. Encasing his body in the thick atmosphere of secure bliss. Holding her figure close against his own, shielding her from the night’s chilling touch.

He liked morning.

She never woke at the same time he did. Mornings usually meant Jason had extra time to gaze down at her face, unblemished by smile or frown lines. Or worry, anxiety. Nothing of the sort existed so early.

He could simply stare. Gaze in awe at the beauty lying with her head against his chest. Bask in her glowing presence. Pray that he wouldn’t wake her while he admired.

While he worshipped. Attended a lonesome mass to lay affections at her feet, laving lingering kisses up her ankle, taking the long path to her lips. Over the velvet skin of her body.

Jason exhaled gently— careful in his actions. Careful to not rouse her from her sleep. His body had other intentions as a loud growl echoed from the cavern of his belly.

Damn.

He had hoped to lay there with her a while longer.

Things would only get worse if he stayed there— louder and more compromising. Besides, if he was waking up hungry (which was always), she would be too.

Pulling himself reluctantly from the warmth of the bedsheets, Jason ensured she stayed asleep. No stealth mission or undercover agent could ever compete with the covert, silent movements of the beast of a man who was hellbent on keeping his goddess asleep.

He spared a glance over his shoulder, a smile gracing his lips. Sunlight caressing her as she slept, tucked away and cocooned in warmth.

One of the rare sunny days in Gotham.

Trekking down the hallway, Jason began his morning routine. Checking the windows, brushing his teeth while checking the spare room converted weapons stash for anything unusual.

Then he started on breakfast.

One of his favorite past-times (other than YN of course).

He knew that he would be teased endlessly, if any of his friends were there to witness his endeavors.

How he doted on her. How he would leave barely there kisses to her lips, only to sink to his knees and lay aggressive love bites to her thighs. To leave marks across her neck.

Only to shake himself from the reviere hours later, sweat laden and pressed to her bare chest; Shake himself to take gentle care of her aching body.

To cradle her against him for the come down— to watch the sunset in the windows of his Church.

How he would be teased and mocked— made a fool of— for his actions.

But there he was: The Arkham Knight, Red Hood, Robin, making breakfast.

The same hands that once choked life from collapsing esophaguses, ripped beating hearts out of gaping chest cavities, fired hollow tip bullets into arteries and foreheads. Leaving mutilation and dark ink as footsteps, encroached on the lives of so many.

Those same hands now dropped blueberries into pancake batter, made freshly squeezed juice. Knife skills that were once fueled by mania; Wide sweeping cuts, meant to pierce flesh and slice deep. Now made precise incisions on fruit.

Such juxtaposition to menial, domestic tasks that it was almost laughable.

But peaceful.

Peace. He’d known nothing of the sort in this strange land of after death. Until her.

The catalyst to his healing, the process that Dick and Roy began all those years ago. The one she helped finish.

A soft, sleepy noise from down the hallway turned Jason’s attention to the vacant space. His cursed eyes lifted in time to witness the sun rise— her brilliance nearly melting the decorations from the walls as she entered through the doorway.

Her warmth bled into his bones as she neared; Arms wrapping around his neck, hands threaded through his hair.

A whispered good morning, breathed out between feather kisses against his mouth.

Scarred hands trailed up her hips, accepting her greeting in stride. Keeping careful watch of how close she moved to the stove.

For all her grace and beauty, she was far less agile and dexterous than she appeared. With her sleep mussed hair and lines still pressed to her face from sleep. She must’ve drooled at some point during the night, as a line of it dried against the corner of her mouth. Her pajamas— just one of his own shirts and her underwear— wrinkled and in disarray.

Beautiful.

She tucked into his side, keeping close to his warmth. Jason kept his arm wrapped tightly around her shoulders, using his free hand to finish breakfast.

She traced light patterns against his bare shoulder blade; Her head cushioned on the soft muscle of his pectoral— the abrasion of his autopsy scar against her cheekbone.

Her lips left a gentle kiss to the marred flesh. Unafraid of his past. Unconcerned of everything, but the steady beat in his rib cage.

Because for as much as he worshiped her, she returned without adversary. Without flinching.

While he attended mass for repentance, praising his angel, she attended her church of the wicked, laying claim to the damned.

#jason todd x f!reader #jason todd x y/n #jason todd x you #jason todd x fem!reader #jason todd x yn #jason todd fluff #jason todd x reader #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd fic

[discocandles]

I said I'd write this LK headcanon into a scene/ficlet so I'll write it dammit(under a read more bc long):

"Henri, get off the roof of the carriage." Sarah scolded. "You'll get knocked off by a tree branch."

"Sarah, you know that no tree branch can defeat the Great and Powerful Henr-agh!!" Henri sputters as he tries to get the tree branch out of his face. The redhead chuckles, "I told you so." going unspoken. Henri huffed as he clambered back into the carriage.

As he settles in, Henri glances over as Sarah is writing another letter to her Maman. She puts more ink on her quill when she writes to Lady Phillips, Henri's realized. They've known each other for almost a year, but Henri has found noticing Sarah's habits to be entertaining on boring rides. It started when Henri asked Moses why Sarah would side with the British.

It had made no sense. Sarah was always nice to him. She'd speak to him in French when he can't think in English, forget talking. The redcoats l'a traité comme de la merde. Moses just asked if the British treat Sarah like they do him. They don't; redcoats smiled at her and asked what a respectable girl was doing with "rebel scum". Henri guessed he'd think the British were good if they treated him like he was good too. But Henri also realized was it was fun to notice things about Sarah.

Sarah has lots of habits, like if she tapped her feet in a rhythm, she was hungry. Or the letters to pass time on boring carriage rides, like this one. Henri wants to climb the carriage again.

"You're awfully quiet, Henri." Sarah's voice broke through Henri's thoughts. "did you get hurt by the tree branches?"

"Non non, je vais bien. Je m'ennuie simplement. James is so lucky to have been rid of this trip already." Henri replies.

"He will be getting to learn more about the camp than we are." Sarah muses, looking back down at her letter, but didn't go back to writing. Her left hand reaches for her collar and curls her finger under her necklace and started flipping her locket around its chain. Henri focused on the repetitive motion.

Henri thinks he's figured this habit out. Plus vite que normale! Sarah messing with her locket almost constantly for a little over a week has helped. When he or Moses mentioned James, she'd have a hand on her necklace soon after. Sarah keeps flipping the golden locket with left hand as she starts writing again.

Henri figured the habit was about James before they left. Saras can be obvious if you're used to noticing like Henri is. Maybe he should be a journalist. But it could mean something particular about him. She could be missing him, but it's kinda late for that. Henri missed James after he left 2 weeks ago, but they'll see him by supper, so he's excited to see him. Sarah doesn't look excited at all.

The carriage shakes as Sarah dips her quill into the inkwell, and she huffs. Is she mad at him? There's no way James could annoy Sarah when he's not around, so she's probably not angry. Maybe she's worried about him? That makes sense. They haven't heard from James since he left, not like they could get it since they left yesterday morning though.

"Are you worried about him?" Henri asks. Oops, that's probably strange to ask. C'est la vie as his friends back in France say.

"What?" Sarah's eyebrows bunch together more. The hand holding her locket goes still, and she looks away for a moment to close her inkwell before turning back to look at him in confusion.

"about James. You look... worried?" Henri tries to choose his words carefully. If Sarah wasn't worried before he asked, he doesn't want to make her worried.

He seems to succeed, because rather than worried, Sarah looks almost embarrassed. "I suppose you're correct. It's just that normally when we depart after James, he sends a letter about the state of the camp and we at least know the voyage will be safe." Sarah was switching between speaking fast and slow, like a dance he learned at the own square. "But we didn't hear anything this week, so I am a bit concerned about James's well-being."

"Okay. Just wondering." Henri laughed. Sarah was fiddling with her locket again.

"I promise to give you my share of bread after supper tonight if you don't mention it to him." Sarah said. "I don't need him mocking me over what is likely just slow mail."

"Deal. I will never refuse good food."

Sarah giggles, as the carriage continues to rattle. "You never do."

#hope that was a sufficient amount of bad french for yall #I might post this on AO3 too #liberty's kids #lk #henri lefebvre #sarah phillips #don't ask me which camp/fort they're riding to. i dont remember which one i was thinking of back when i started this #also i know that's a very rudementary reason for sarah to be a loyalist but its from henri's pov not sarah's #james hiller x sarah phillips

[not-rude-ginger]

"He got all the emotional intelligence either side of his family could muster, which isn't a lot but he's got more than the rest!" xD You are so right about our princeling. Love JL so much for it and you get it.

Also, if it's "appreciating details of not-rude-ginger's writing" hour, then I love your LWJ. Post WWX resurrection, LWJ can sometimes come as someone who no longer cares about anything if it's WWX doing something, but that is a disservice to his character, which is why I greatly appreciate that you show him disagreeing with him not just in the inconsequential, but also things that WWX really thinks he's doing right, both in the present when he tries to trick JC (and everyone else) into moving "the parasite" into WWX's own body, and also in the past, when LWJ admits that under further inspection the golden core transfer was a little fucked up. Having LWJ actually say that WWX is wrong when he crosses boundaries and is important for the future balance of their relationship, so I really love you for showing it. [Not having the narrative (and LWJ) rewarding WWX's bad traits is important for his development!]

Another thing I absolutely loved about your LWJ was that his attempt to apologize to JC went absolutely sideways. I adored it because JC saw right through him (because JC can be insightful!) and called him out in a way he didn't know how to face (because LWJ hates the fact JC can understand him! tries to force him to examine things he doesn't want to!) and the goodwill moment just crashed in such a natural way it was beautiful. And yet, despite that, later LWJ still stayed to protect JC when WWX was needed elsewhere, awkwardness and all. I love him for that.

(An extra LWJ detail I enjoyed: his reaction to XY's death. I love the reminder that even though he's as much of a war veteran as WWX and JC, he was never as vicious as they were, and certain things are less palatable to him. Still, he marches on.)

Oops, I didn't realize I had that much to say, my bad! Bunny got excited because I absolutely love your writing. Thanks so much for sharing your stuff with us! 🐰💛

All this love is amazing!!

I love LWJ in all his stubborn bitchy glory and while he's more fun to write in Ink because that's a comedy and his reactions are funny, I enjoy finding his depths in For What because I feel he still has strong convictions, even if a lot of it becomes very WWX focused. Still, not letting WWX do self sacrificing stuff is better for everyone so he can't just let him do anything he wants.

Also, him and JC have excellent chemistry and woe to all if they ever bury the hatchet completely and become a WWX and duckling defense team.

Also, while he's mostly been in the background of For What, he is having to absorb that JC isn't some cold hearted monster but a very competent and caring person, even if he doesn't like his style. He's been going on his own journey in Lotus Pier.

#for what for all but myself #anon ask #asked and answered #lan wangji #jiang cheng #wei wuxian

[fiberflxwer]

—  DEERLY BELOVED  ╱  shadow-tagging people had turned out to be more fun than he'd thought it'd be. he had a lot of talents going for him, but he'd never really considered sneaking around to be one of them, after all. but just for one day, right?

so when he spots a girl passing by who he doesn't know, but whose look really catches his eye, he knows just what to do.

"hey there! i'm rosado." but at the last second, he decides— stealth still really wasn't his thing in the end. so he comes up right in front of her instead, with soft smile asparkle and hand outstretched, passing over a slip of deer-shaped paper. "i wanted you to have this."

your look is super adorable. the rustic colors completely bring out your personality and uniqueness. your hair is so pretty, and the style is to die for. and those little bows are everything. share your tips with me sometime. hope you keep being you!

A Golden Deer corner...I mean, I have to sit by here don't I? It's my house! That is the line of logic of the student standing in front of the variety of dishes and activities that her fellow peers have set up in the dining hall. Faye's injuries have mostly waned off now, so there should be no issue in partaking in the festivities. And the bunches of cakes and chocolates do appear appealing after a day (or more like...a few hours, tops) of harsh fighting.

Her plight for sweet delight is delayed by the call of another, turning back only to twist right back around when the person moves back to where she was initially looking. It's a boy that she at least somewhat recognizes from overlapping classes. Rosado, if she is to believe his previous call. Instead of further words, however, he presents a deer-shaped paper with...writing on it? Faye reaches over and picks it up for a closer look.

He thinks she's...adorable?! There's all of these reasonable remarks on her personal choices as well. His handwriting is pretty fancy as well, yet easy to read through. Faye is more impressed at the eyes of this individual than truly thankful for the comments. Still, some gratitude that shines through.

But now she couldn't do anything else but return the favor, could she?

"Thank you very- actually, just wait there a sec, okay?" If he is exchanging papers rather than speeches, then she must comply with the same rules. Faye spots the stack of yellow deer papers nearby and pulls one over along with a silver-ink pen. It should compliment the pretty student's hair color perfectly! ...wait, what compliments is she even writing down, actually?

After some fast-paced scribbling that probably could have used a lookover, Faye sets her pen aside and rushes back to Rosado. "And you can have this!" Faye stretches her arm out in an attempt to reach the hand that gave her the other paper, only to lean in so much that the end of her paper sticks on his fingers. Oops. They are meant to do that, right?

Your hair is cool too! I've  never seen anythinglike it! I don't think I'dknow much, but I   can help? ​​​​​​​Oh, also I'm Faye.

#rozyrne #~ ic #~ asks #GDPride2024 #(I still think Faye goes a little “???” when complimented but this was very cute tysm!!)

[sciencestyled]

The Bizarre Odyssey of Science Ed: From Quill to Quantum Quirks

Hey Zippy, strap in! We're diving headfirst into the rollicking, roller-coaster history of science education, where the only constant is change, much like your relationship status on social media! Picture this: centuries ago, dusty old scholars, probably in Hogwarts-esque robes, were scribbling away about the natural world. No YouTube, no TikTok – just quills, ink, and a whole lot of imagination. Fast forward, and we've got major game changers like John Dewey, who turned the traditional classroom upside down faster than a cat on a Roomba.

Let's talk about the mad science of curriculum development. Ever wonder who decides if you learn about black holes or why soda explodes with Mentos? It's a delicate dance (oops, can't say dance), a balancing act between theory and hands-on experiments that would make even a Cirque du Soleil performer dizzy. They have to consider what fries the brains of kindergartners versus what tickles the neurons of high schoolers.

Zippy, remember when the biggest tech in class was an overhead projector? Now, it's like Star Trek in there. Virtual labs, online resources, and interactive software have turned science education into an episode of Black Mirror – minus the existential dread, hopefully. These tech marvels are transforming us from passive listeners to active science ninjas.

And let's gab about science education and society. It’s like a superhero, battling the villains of climate change, health crises, and the ethical brain-twisters of tech. A scientifically literate society is like having the Avengers on speed dial, ready to tackle Thanos-level threats with the power of knowledge.

Innovative teaching methods? Oh boy, Zippy, we're in the golden age of educational alchemy. Inquiry-based learning, project-based learning, flipped classrooms – it's like teachers have a Hogwarts spell book, turning bored students into wide-eyed Einsteins.

But it ain’t all sunshine and chemical reactions. Science education faces more challenges than a contestant on Survivor. Resource limitations, teacher training, student engagement – it's a jungle out there. And don't get me started on the need for diversity and inclusion. We're trying to build a science community that looks more like a United Colors of Benetton ad and less like a meeting of the Mad Scientist Club.

Assessment and evaluation are as tricky as assembling IKEA furniture with missing instructions. Standardized tests, project-based assessments, feedback – it's a smorgasbord of methods trying to measure if your brain absorbed more than just the lunch menu.

Now, Zippy, ever wonder how science education is like a worldwide game of telephone? Each country adds its own flavor. The cultural, economic, and political seasoning creates a buffet ranging from spicy to sweet in science education. It's like Epcot, but for science nerds.

STEM and interdisciplinary approaches are like the Avengers assembling. Mixing science with technology, engineering, and mathematics, we’re crafting a generation of superhero students ready to tackle real-world challenges – if they can stop binging Netflix long enough.

Can't forget informal science education. Museums, science centers, and community programs are like the sidekicks to formal education, offering hands-on, real-world experiences. They turn 'boring' science into a detective adventure, minus the deerstalker hat and pipe.

Environmental and sustainability education is no longer just a niche for tree huggers. It's mainstream, baby! We're teaching kids to be the guardians of the galaxy, Earth edition, armed with knowledge and a passion for conservation.

Finally, equity and accessibility in science education – this is the Endgame, Zippy. We’re battling the Thanos of inequality, striving for a world where every kid, regardless of their background, gets a seat at the science table.

So there you have it, Zippy – a whirlwind tour of science education, from ancient scrolls to digital tablets, from elite academies to classrooms in every corner of the globe. It's a story of evolution, revolution, and the never-ending quest to understand our world. Science education isn’t just about facts and figures; it’s a wild, wacky adventure, full of surprises and challenges, and let’s face it, a few explosions along the way. But that’s what makes it so darn exciting. Ready for the next chapter? Because science never stops, and neither do we!

#science education #science #education #learning #art #physics

[adventuresinclientservice]

Why bother with direct marketing?

Years ago my colleagues Simon Sinek and Tony Gomes were running an agency called Sinek/Gomes – yes, this is the Simon of Start With Why fame; a check of their bios reveals both of them have selective amnesia when it comes to their then-partnership – but they also moonlighted as adjunct professors at Columbia University, teaching in its graduate program on Strategic Communications.  I at the time was, to my eternal regret, CEO of Rapp’s New York office.  

At some point they reached out, asking me if I would lead a session on direct marketing, so on the appointed day and hour I dutifully made my way uptown to Columbia’s Morningside Heights campus.

“What makes you think I’m from New York?”

Now mostly supplanted and largely superseded by web-based initiatives, direct response marketing still very much mattered in the early aughts, especially those initiatives that addressed individual clients, customers, and prospects by name.  Except, of course, when you misspelled the names of recipients, which was beyond calamitous.

Wanting to make and reinforce this point, I had an oversize mailing envelope mocked up with Simon’s name and address on it, with one small adjustment: I added an “e” to Simon’s name, turning him into “Simone.”

I recall Simone – oops, I mean Simon -- being none too happy about this sudden change in gender, but it drew a few laughs from listeners, and I was able to make my point:  get the names right and you’re golden; get them wrong and recipients will never forget or forgive, holding the brand, the company, the product/service forever responsible, accountable, and to blame.  Instead of reinforcing what you are trying to sell, you erode it, often damaging it beyond salvation.

Blowing it on names right certainly isn’t the only thing you can screw up; witness an email I received from Nathalie Schallier, who works at Onyx Media:

“Hey Robert - I see you’re based in New York ....

“Was wondering if you’re interested to hearing how I can create 15 on brand social media posts for Solomon Strategic? The posts will be written and designed according to your preferences, so they match your tone of voice perfectly.”

I wrote back:

“What makes you think I’m based in New York, Nathalie?”

A week-plus goes by without a reply.

Why Direct matters.

In the previous, 20th century analog, ink-on-paper days, personalizing a piece of mail was a complicated, time-consuming, and expensive task, one those of us in direct marketing took seriously, knowing how damaging it would be if we butchered names or other easy-to-know facts.  In the current 21st century digital environment, personalization is a whole lot easier to achieve, and yet I see email after email that is little more than discardable junk, Nathalie Schallier’s delete-able garbage among them.

In case this didn’t register the first time, let me repeat that the worst thing you can do is get recipients’ names wrong.

The second worst thing you can do is get details of their life/work wrong.

It has been ten-plus years since I called Manhattan home.  Anyone who spends 30 seconds looking into my background will see I am a Napa resident.  Hello, Nathalie Schallier, I’m writing about you:  you couldn’t bother to check before you carpet-bombed me and others with your unsolicited pitch?

The best, most strategically and technically sound digital marketers are not the Nathalie Schalliers of the world; they are pros who cut their teeth in Direct, knowing better than most how not to create discardable junk email.  

I’m done ranting, but if one of you asks, “What’s direct marketing?” I already know the battle I’m fighting is lost.

[reanimationstation]

[ID: a page of sketches of Sammy falling asleep places, a few poses inspired by art references by @/riddleblg

From left to right, the first is Sammy mostly on the floor, having fallen off the bed, with Bendy standing over him on the bed. Bendy looks sheepish as he says "oops," an arrow pointing at him that says "was trying to wake him up."

Next is Sammy asleep holding Bendy in his arms, who is struggling to get out of his grasp and complaining "nooo dad let me gooo."

Third is Sammy falling asleep against a wall.

Fourth is Sammy asleep facedown on a bench, arms, legs, and wings hanging down from it. One of his wings is draped over the back.

Last is Sammy, who looks like he's falling asleep standing up, holding onto Jack's arm for stability. Jack looks at him concerned as he asks "Sammy?"/End ID]

for a while now sam hasnt been able to sleep as a side effect to his consumption of the golden ink but i suggested that once he's properly an ink monster, the golden ink would instead hold him to a very strict sleep schedule. leading him to fall asleep anywhere that he finds himself at that time, which is very inconvenient for someone like sammy, and therefore very funny to us the players. also i need a way to long rest i cant live off of the limited hit die i have left my hp is so low

#sammy lawrence #batim bendy #jack fain #batim coffeecake #batim dnd #sammy x jack #victors art #although it wasnt a suggestion i may also pitch that he just starts to get sleepy anywhere its dark #like a bird #which would also lead to shenanigans

[madhattervanessa]

Restore

One of the few LotR blurbs I have written, not my typical stuff but I hope you enjoy it, dearest Reader!

Pairing: Erestor x Narriel(f!OC)

Summary: Erestor is bound to his responsibilities in Imladris - his burdens are eased when his favorite elleth lays down her duties to come visit him, easing his unrest.

Warnings: fingering, exhibitionism (making out in the library and sex by the window, oops), wall sex, fluffy romantic stuff that makes me feel warm aka yearning, longing and the likes

Words: 3422

Masterlist - Mobile Masterlist

“Narriel.”

“Erestor”, she mumbles back and barely smiles before biting at her bottom lip. 

Erestor’s eyes follow her as she scurries along to the next shelf.

She sorts in the books with care. Erestor briefly glances back at his notes, then back at her. Her hair, the ribbons twisted into it.

“Can I help you?”

Erestor hides his smile by looking back at the shelves in front of him. 

She walks over to him and his breath hitches when their shoulders touch. She licks across her teeth as she sorts in the next book, high up on the shelf.

His eyes automatically glaze over her body like thick honey, over the curve of her spine to her hips.

His hands leave his notes on the table next to him and instead find her waist. His nose finds that spot behind her ear, skin touching skin, finally. He breathes her in, between the old books, smells of dead trees and ink, a breath of wood glue and leather strings and sweet, soft skin.

“Erestor…”, she mutters and gods, it’s soft, softer than the air in here.

He turns her and then there’s her lips, parted and petal soft, so close to him… 

“Erestor!” The harsh nudge into his shoulder makes him wake up, finally.

“Glorfindel-! What are you doing here?”

“Well, my dear friend, I thought you would like to know your favorite elleth has arrived together with the King’s diplomats.”

Finally.

Erestort tries his best to school his expressions at the announcement but judging by his friend’s eyes, he is not successful.

“By the Valar, Erestor, a smile? That diplomat’s arrival puts you in such good spirits?”

“Glorfindel- do not tease me”, Erestor tries to grumble but there’s the treacherous twitch of his lips again.

The golden haired elf grins, wide and bright as he is and Erestor sighs in defeat.

“How far?”

“Enough time for you to freshen up and get down there to greet her.”

Glorfindel gently takes the quill out of Erestor’s hand and closes the book in front of him.

“So, go, my friend. I’ll clean up here”, he adds, a friendly pat on the shoulder added for good measure.

Erestor thinks his heart might be beating loud enough for the whole court to hear. He fumbles in his dark green robes, the white shirt he had been saving for this, knowing exactly how she had complimented it the first time he had worn it. 

Complimenting it with her hands, her lips, trailing- he catches his train of thought before he can blush. 

And then, there’s the announcement- the doors, opening. 

His eyes search for her immediately, as he bows at the hip and ignores everything said, he doesn’t care, he can’t… 

Their eyes meet and he tucks away that smile into the depths, the folds and creases of his heart. 

When she speaks- it’s like the heaven’s have broken up to gift the dry, barren land of his soul.

“Erestor. It’s a pleasure to see you again.” Her smile, the sun, and as he kisses her hand, her beautiful hand- he can smell it again. That scent. Leather and wood glue. Careful strokes of her brushes against the pages, the paints dripping from her delicate fingertips. The ink flowing over her knuckles.

“The pleasure is mine. Certainly, the King has thought twice to send out one of his most precious jewels.”

The praise makes her smile, unguarded.

“You spoil me with your compliments, Erestor”, she mutters, the confidence on her skin is glowing, nevertheless. Her eyes seize him up and he thinks or just projects enjoyment onto her face. “I do hope you will indulge me and let me see your impressive library yet again.” There’s a wink, a glint of light in her eyes, that playfulness that he missed so painfully because nobody else, no one, could elicit the same feelings in him as she could. 

Bright sunlight on her skin reappears in his mind graphically. Her naked skin, stretched and illuminated as if she were gifted to him by Aulë himself.

“I wouldn’t ever be able to keep it from you.” The answer stumbles out of him and he thinks his heart would be next if that lovely lunch hadn’t been waiting for the guests.

He excuses himself to work instead, antsy and full of unrest, unable to sit across from her enveloped in stiff mannerisms. 

So he goes back to his work. He knows she will most likely find him here.

And she does.

It’s her humming that gives her away. 

And the late hour. 

Barely anyone else is in the library now, either headed to dinner or to bed. But certainly not to learn. Some pick up another read for late afternoon studies or bedtime. Some return them and some actually do research in the silence left after the bustling of future healers and other’s seeking knowledge to learn.

Erestor stays quiet, continuing to sort out books that would need repairing from this shelf.

Her footfalls are soft, too quiet even for an elf. He knows, repairing books hasn't always been her occupation and he likes the cat and mouse game they fall into when they are caught between bookshelves.

He looks up to check if she is there yet and catches her dress sparkling in the afternoon light through the rows of the shelves, the books hiding her complete form from his view.

He wets his lip but continues his work nonetheless, sorting out another book to the desk in this row.

He sees her in the corner of his eye when she arrives at his location. 

They both smile at each other and she glances back behind her before invading the space between him and the bookshelf he is standing in front of.

Her hands gently trace over his arm until he lets it fall and turns towards her. He can’t quite stop himself, not now, when he finally has her all to himself.

His nose traces a line from her cheek to her ear and finally, a deja vu, the familiar smell of her, oh so faint but so intoxicating to him. He corners her there, right between his chest and the shelf and she turns her head until she can kiss his cheek.

His hands slot into their rightful place on her waist and he sighs, not able to hold his breath and with it her scent any longer.

“You become more beautiful each time I see you, meleth nîn…”, he whispers and she laughs, bright as a bell as she takes one of the strands of his hair between her fingers, twirling it around her finger like she had done with his heart.

Her lips press another kiss to the corner of his mouth and their eyes meet again.

“I couldn't just sit there. I trust Glorfindel and the others have entertained you well enough.”

“You are a sweet talker, Erestor- why weren’t you at lunch? I would have enjoyed some good entertainment.”

He chuckles against her lips and lets his thumb rub over her waist.

She hums, a smart remark already forming on her lips about it. “And if I had been there, I felt something scandalous might have taken place with the way this dress catches my eyes”, he adds and leans down to kiss her collarbone, ears perking up at her hitched intake of breath.

“Erestor-”

“Erestor?”, the call echoing through the shelves makes them both jump and Erestor’s heart flutters in his chest. 

Glorfindel. Of course, the books he had left in the office...

She bats her eyelashes at him as he turns back to her. By the Valar, Glorfindel would take ages to find him here, surely a kiss wouldn’t be wrong. 

Just one, just one for now-

Erestor lets one of his hands trail up, up over that neckline and collarbone and the soft skin of her neck and to her chin, tilting it up so he can engulf those lips he had been thinking about, that had haunted him into his sleep. His firm kiss tumbles out of him with the hunger and desire he had swallowed down so long, pressing her against him, flush to his body and the spines of the books behind her.

A hum vibrates against his lips as he parts from her. When they both open their eyes, one of her hands snakes its way underneath his shirt and she lets her lips part.

It’s a spell he can’t escape and so he leans back in, caressing her lower lip with his tongue before delving back in to devour her with his lips, trying to preserve this moment.

His hand keeps her right there against him and he moves his legs in between hers, making her gasp and nip at his lips. He licks into the cavern of her mouth in retaliation, holding her still as he moves against her, trying to coax more sweet sounds out of her throat so he can keep them in his memory.

“Oh, by the Valar-!” The shocked exclamation makes them part and Erestor’s head snaps towards the intruder, covering her the best he can. Lindir, books in hand and wide-eyed, stands as if lightning had struck him, in the row of bookshelves across. It doesn’t seem like he had just walked in on them at this very moment.

“I-I am so sorry-”

“Lindir, have you found him?”

Erestor is scowling by now and a breathless chuckle behind him reaches his ear as Glorfindel rounds the corner.

“Ah, I see. Thank you, my friend.” Glorfindel clasps a hand over Lindir’s shoulder and pushes him into the next row, walking towards the pair entangled against the bookshelf. He is grinning and Erestor’s scowl deepens.

“Fix your shirt, friend and follow me, please, there is a matter still in need of your attention before you can retire to… maybe a more private setting”, he casually remarks and comes to a halt right in front of his angered friend who seems, besides his opened shirt, completely unaffected. “Hello again, Narriel.”

“Captain Glorfindel..”, she mutters and fixes her hair again as she steps out from behind Erestor.

“And here I thought Erestor could not be doing anything but work, especially here in the library… Although I do understand the temptation.”

He barely bows at his hip and winks at her. She smiles in return, her hands fumbling with her necklace. 

“Glorfindel. Let’s get your books”, Erestor grumbles, shirt fixed and his hands already in the process of turning his friend away from her. 

“Yes, yes of course, my friend. As quickly as possible so you can return to your dandling-”

“Glorfindel!”, Erestor hisses with a nervous look towards the direction where Lindir had disappeared. 

Her hands take one of his and a feathery kiss is pressed against it. 

“We shall see each other later again, then, Erestor?”

He grabs her hands before she can withdraw them, not at all fazed by Glorfindel’s proximity.

“Stay here, I will be right back”, he mutters and briefly caresses her cheek, feeling the warmth of her flushed skin and the way she hides a mischievous smile. He kisses her forehead and Glorfindel clears his throat.

And then, she returns to the state of a dream, slightly disheveled and flushed behind a shelf as she picks up one of the books he had sorted out for repairs.

Erestor tries not to let his frustration at the interruption reach the outside, content with the kisses he had stolen from her for now as he follows Glorfindel back to the desk above the library shelves he preferred to work from.

He returns to that particular desk when the afternoon sun has grown lazy with warmth, setting, almost. Erestor can see the dust flying in the air as he wipes over the desk, the books long gone. He smiles to himself and on his way out, finds them neatly stacked in the shelf used for turning in books and letters to his office. 

When he reaches his private chambers, he can already hear the soft humming. 

A few bowls of fruit are scattered about his living space’s tables and the culprit sits in the windowsill, thumbing at the page of a book. 

Erestor closes the door softly behind him and smiles as her gaze briefly flickers towards him.

“Here you are, meleth nîn…”, he mutters, his hands already itching to touch her. But he opts for one of the sweet berries instead, savoring it on his tongue, knowing she will taste it later.

“I thought I would shorten your way.”

“Where is the room you are staying in?”, he mutters, popping another one of the sweet berries in his mouth as he stalks towards her, already shedding his robes, leaving the green fabric hanging over the armchair close to the fireplace he would frequent in the colder nights.

He remembered having her on the carpet there, in front of the fire, her skin glowing with the warmth of it, the begging of her lips… 

She sets the book aside and smiles up at him, catching his hands in her own.

“I am staying close to the others, my usual room, I think.”

“So far away…”, he mumbles.

“What were you thinking about there?”, she answers in return, her eyes fixing him and the memory he had pops back into the forefront of his mind.

“Do you remember last winter?”, he answers instead, trailing his fingers over that tempting neckline yet again, admiring the lace delicately decorating her beautiful skin. She smirks, then, eyes wandering over the room to the fireplace.

“I do. You hadn’t even let me get out of my furs”, she trails off and smiles as he leans in to kiss her temple. “You have yet to visit me, you know?”

“Yes, I know… I know”, he mutters, his fingers trailing down and finding some metal hooks in the space between her breasts. The wind gust from the window behind her makes the curtains sway. She looks like a painting. He wishes, for once, he could paint, desperately. “It is not my fault your diplomats enjoy traveling so much, you know?”

The front of her dress falls open, revealing her chest, bare and heaving, to him.

“I should consider staying back home, then.”

“To lure me there, meleth nîn?”

“Could I?”, she whispers, reaching out to loosen his breeches. Erestor’s breath hitches and he decides to tilt her head upwards for another, searing kiss. He swallows her sighs as his hand palms her chest, feeling her heart hammer through the soft skin.

“Erestor, the window-”

“I need you, guren vell-” he mutters and then there’s that smile, that glint in her eyes before he kisses her again, opening her mouth with his own to taste her. The tang of the berries invades his mouth again and he moans when her hands find his straining hardness under the breeches. “I wanted you against that bookshelf- Valar aid me, I’ve missed you, I can barely help myself around you”, he whispers, hot breath fanning over her ear before he kisses the earlobe, working his way to the sensitive skin of her neck. 

She moans, his name this time and his hands push off the garment from her shoulders. 

But Erestor doesn’t fall into a frenzy. 

He can’t. No, he will and has to enjoy this. Before she leaves him again.

He takes her there, against the window until she turns, sits him down there. The fabrics of the curtains are bunching behind his naked back as she rides him, bare for him, the sunlight bathing her in golden light as it sets.

There’s a pearl of sweat running down between her breasts. Erestor does not hesitate to catch it with his lips, entranced by the way she is moving in his lap, unapologetically. Beautifully.

“Narriel-”, he is breathless, chest heaving as she holds him pressed between her hand and the cold glass. Her thighs flex as she lifts herself again, pressing him back into her depths as he lets his head fall backwards, exposing his throat, all of himself, to her.

She could kill him and he would thank her.

The thought makes him lift her, grab her by her thighs and press her against the wall.

He needed this, needed to take her. Just like wants. Like he had wanted for the past months.

She gasps his name again, chuckling against him until it turns into a moan as he pounds her against the walls of his rooms.

When she bares her throat to him he can not resist to kiss and lick at it, smelling and tasting the slick sweat of her skin against his tongue.

“Just like that- wanted you in the library, just like this.”

She moans, her nails raking over the skin of his back with a vicious burn.

“I would have let you, Erestor-”, he tastes her words, then, his body out of his control now, his mind a floating thing behind him as he grunts and growls against her mouth, the idea alone making him twitch inside her warmth. When he parts from her lips, he bites at her collarbone, feral and wild in his antics like her hands on his back, tangled in his hair. They both pull and push, harsh breaths and grunts. He slams one hand against the wall beside her head as he feels her tighten.

“Erestor, I would let you do anything-”

“Meleth nîn-”, he sighs, licking the salt off of her breasts and then her legs pull him closer, closer until their noses are pressed against each other’s cheeks and then, there’s the drop, like falling into cool water.

They both groan and her hands grab his shoulders so hard, he knows he will bruise.

He’ll wear these bruises like an honorary title.

She mutters his name and his mind and body reconnect, the exhaustion flooding in with the consciousness.

His heart feels weak as he carries her from the wall to his bed. He sets her down carefully but before he can withdraw to safe distance, he is pulled in by her warm limbs, soft hands caressing his cheek, his temples.

“Come here, Erestor.”

He smiles, eyelids already falling before he decides to do so, as well.

Her laughter rings, clear and bright as a bell as he falls so unceremoniously into the sheets next to her.

Her fingertips trail over his chin and lips to his brows.

He hears the sheets whisper as she sits, throwing one leg over his hips.

He winces as she bears her weight down before she finds a better position. Then, her fingers slightly press into the muscle underneath his brow.

A sigh he didn’t know he had stored there tumbles out and she mumbles something soft as she lets her fingers circle there.

“...Erestor. You mustn’t frown so much... “, she adds and kisses his forehead before going on with the featherlight massage to his face.

As he opens his eyes just the slightest bit to steal a glance, he can feel his tension melting away completely.

The sun forms stripes on her body and her hair pools over her shoulders like a waterfall.

“Is that a smile, Erestor?”

He would smile all day if she were around him, he knows, the tension of his muscles and the cramping pain so regularly appearing in his back would simply melt away in the heat of her gaze. She chuckles and he hums in content as she moves on to his temples.

“You spoil me, meleth nîn.”

“You do deserve it, Erestor.”

He hums non committedly, ready to talk back but she hits that spot under his brow that makes his skin crawl so he keeps silent.

“You know, Glorfindel said you are like a mirror without shine, failing to reflect all the light and sun bestowed upon you. Said you do not deserve me.”

Erestor frowns but she smoothes it over with her fingers, the rise in his tired bones calmed along with it, lured to sleep like a cat with lavender.

“But I disagree. I know you are just deep waters, warm underneath the surface.” She sighs, then, her thumbs rubbing circles over his tense jaw. His mouth goes slack and now a second later he feels her lips, hovering, teasing over his own before she presses a kiss to his mouth.

“I like swimming in your waters, Erestor.”

He squeezes her waist in response, an easy smile spreading on his lips.

#erestor #erestor x reader #lord of the rings #lotr #elves #glorfindel #blurb #tolkien #jrr tolkien

[shookspearewrites]

Shookspeare Valentines: Dazai

My flowers it is time for the Dazai installment of #shookspearevalentines and when I tell you I have so much fun writing for him! Dazai is such a lovely character and I’m,, I love him sm 🥺 

I’m tagging my sweet little apple @dazaiswindow bc I know that she is the #1 Dazai stan, the conductor of the Dazai train and we must respect he as such! Srsly tho, ily Sara! And you should totally check out her writings if you haven’t already - she’s so super talented ^^

- JJ x

~~~~~~~~~~

Irises in your eyes, Dazai Osamu x MC

“Dazai must you stare at me so intensely while I’m trying to work?” MC sighed softly as she wiped her flour-covered hands against her apron.The sweet housemaid sauntered from the kitchen counter and over to the table a few feet across the room where her darling poet of a husband sat. She leant down to kiss his lips sweetly, their gazes meeting after their lips parted, “You know if you wanted my attention you could’ve just asked.”

“Ah-ah, Toshiko-san, you just keep on working,” Dazai smiled charmingly at his wife, a playful twinkle in his golden eyes, “I’m just observing, is all. Nothing more, nothing less.” His smile only grew when MC rolled her eyes and gave him another quick kiss before returning to the bread that she was baking. The novelist watched her lovingly, his gaze softer than ever before as his eyes followed her around the kitchen with adoration. Dazai took a notebook and pen from one of his pockets and put ink to paper, jotting down a few inspired lines which had unexpectedly come to him before he stood up from his chair. With long strides, he approached his wife and held her waist between his warm hands, leaning over her shoulder to softly kiss her cheek, “I’ve got to help Ai-chan in the city this afternoon,” he lied through his teeth to give himself an alibi, “But I’ll be home before dinner.” Though, that second part was nothing but the truth.

“Okay, Dazai. Be careful and I love you.” His wife responded before she turned in his embrace to hug him closely.

“As I love you.” The novelist replied to MC before giving her a soft kiss and taking his leave.

A few hours later, Dazai found himself sat by the sloshing waters of the Seine, scribbling away in his book of poetry when his eyes fell upon a florist just across the river. How perfect, he thought as he stood and strolled over toward the shop. The charming novellist pushed open the front door and greeted the shop keeper with a sincere smile, “Bonjour.”

By the time that Dazai had returned to the mansion, MC had figured out that her husband had not been out to city to assist Isaac, rather, on the contrary, the physicist in question has been at home for most of the day. Though, she had simply brushed it off for the most part since she knew that her husband had a little habit of mixing up his plans. The soft spoken Japanese man entered the dining room where his darling wife was beginning to set the table in preparation for dinner in half an hour’s time. “Ah, good evening, MC-san.” Dazai hummed softly, his arms behind his back as he approached his beautiful wife, “Did you miss me?”

“More than you can imagine, Dazai-san.” She replied as she put down the cutlery she was polishing to greet him with a kiss to his soft cheek, “What’ve you got hidden behind your back, dear?”

“Oh, you’ve caught me! Oops- well, I might as well show you,” the poet grinned as he produced an immaculate bouquet from behind his back, the beautiful flowers making his radiant wife gasp with delight, “Happy valentines day.”

“Oh Dazai,” the lady threw her arms around her husband joyfully as she smiled gleefully. MC took the flowers in her hands and gazed at them adoringly before returning her attention to Dazai, “My wedding bouquet ... you remembered!” Dazai chuckled lightheartedly and nodded before sharing another sweet kiss with MC who couldn’t seem to wipe the smile from her lips, “Happy valentines day, my love.”

“And I have another surprise but, it seems that it’ll have to wait until after dinner,” Dazai grinned at the small pout which formed on MC’s sweet lips as the couple noticed Sebastian entering the dining room, “Don’t pout, MC-san! It shall all be worth the wait.”

Dinner that evening seemed to go by agonizingly slowly as MC anxiously awaited whatever surprises that Dazai may have up his sleeve. Though, when the end of the meal finally rolled around and MC was relieved of her nightly chores by Sebastian, she couldn’t seem to find her eccentric husband anywhere. That is, until she reached their shared bedroom which was adorned with countless lit candles which gave the room a delightfully romantic atmosphere. Dazai sat on the bed and beckoned his gorgeous wife toward him, to which she complied, laying down comfily beside him. “I wrote you a poem. Please may I read it to you?”

“I-I, of course you can, Dazai,” MC blushed softly as the inky-haired man’s sunset-like gaze met her own.

“It seems that even in the winter you bloom brightly,

And your petals blossom nightly,

For you are the prettiest flower in the garden of my heart.

There’s no doubt in my mind,

That there are irises in your eyes,

And that you are the finest flower of the bunch.

I’d like to say, if I may, that despite their beauty,

You, my dear, are far more exquisite than any bouquet.”

 Dazai smiled after his romantic recital, rather pleased with the speechless, blushing bundle of adorableness that was his heavenly wife who lay in his strong arms. MC buried her face into the crook of her husband’s neck as she blushed a bright pink that could put even the prettiest of roses to shame, the heat off of her cheeks radiating onto her lover’s skin. “Thank you, Dazai. It’s beautiful,” She whispered, placing a careful kiss to his cheek and then another to his earlobe, “You’re beautiful.”

“Well then, that makes two of us, doesn’t it, MC?”

#shookspearevalentines #ikemen vampire #ikemen vampire x reader #ikemen vampire x mc #ikevamp #ikevamp x reader #ikevamp x mc #ikevamp fanfic #ikemen vampire fanfic #dazai ikevamp #dazai osamu ikevamp #ikevamp dazai #ikevamp dazai x mc #ikevamp dazai x reader #ikemen vampire dazai #ikemen vampire dazai x reader #ikemen vampire dazai x mc #ikemen vampire dazai osamu #ikevam dazai #ikevamp dazai osamu #ikevam dazai x reader #ikevam dazai x mc #ikemen dazai #ikemen series #ikemen series x reader #cybird ikemen #cybird ikemen x reader #dazai ikemen vampire #dazai ikevam

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

When I saw everyone writing to Miss Raven happy birthday I freaked out ddfvdvfhdvfh So! This one's for miss raven! ^^ "Hello, Miss Raven! I'm so sorry I realized it's your birthday ;-;;;; But I want you to have these seashell pens! ^^ They're pretty cool, and maybe you can give one to Mr Jade so you two can be writing with the same pen! It'll be adorable!!"

Ahh, yeah! Raven and Leona have the same birthday (which actually ended up playing really well into her lore)!

I actually wasn't expecting this many gifts for her 💦 At some point, she had more than Leona oops, and now they're pretty much neck-and-neck, so I'm alternating between gifts for Raven and gifts for Leona. I'm blown away by the outpour of love for birb dotter 🥺

"No, no, it's fine. R-Really, it is!" Raven insisted, frantically waving her hands around. "Having spent most of my life as a bird in the wild, I didn't have much of a concept of what a 'birthday' was until the past... year or so? In any case, the fault likes with no one."

She had already long since accepted her fate as a supporting character, cast in a role so minor she would not be given a name when the story was published.

"... Oh? You have something for me?"

Her face brightened considerably when you whipped out a few pens loaded with shimmering ink. Each of the pens sported a clear cap, and from that cap dangled little scallop seashells and a faux pearl on a chain.

"Uwaaaah! They're so cute...!!" Raven cried, clasping her hands together. Her honey-colored eyes seemed to expand in size, and the golden rings of her irises sparkled with newfound light. "Can I really have them?"

She jolted back when the eel's name came up. "Wh-What?! G-Give one... t-to J Leech... so we h-have the same writing implement... B-But isn't 'twinning' a-an intimate activity? Then... th-that would mean...!!"

"Hwawawawawah...!!" Raven squeaked shyly, burying her (rapidly reddening) face in her hands. "Cute...!! T-Too cute... I-I'm not worthy of such a thing...!!"

#twst oc #twisted wonderland oc #Raven Crowley #Raven birthday takeover

[thiswasinevitableid]

10 tattoos/piercing, Danbrey, sfw, please!

Here you go! I based Dani's design on an arowana because I liked the color.

“Remember, non-scented soap, nice to meet you, byeee!” Aubrey waves to her client as they head down the boardwalk. She has thirty minutes until her next appointment, so it’s time to stretch her legs and check the little ‘doggy cam” she set up on Dr. Harris Bonkers cage to make sure the giant rabbit hasn’t finally managed to chew his way through the bars.

“Hi doctor” She coos into the phone. One white ear pivots towards the camera, but the bunny remains otherwise unmoved.

She leans on the railing, Pacfic sparkling like a postcard before her.

“Excuse me?”

“YEEEEP!” She jumps back, not expecting a woman to pop out of the water, let alone pop out and talk to her.

“Oops, sorry.” The other woman smiles, golden hair fanning out around her. There are two types of blondes in Long Beach; the ones hoping to be the next influencer sensation and the kind who are excited to tell you about GOOP and crystals.

Whichever kind this woman is, she’s the most gorgeous girl Aubrey’s ever seen.

“Um, can I help you?”

“Yeah! Can you tattoo me? A piercing would be okay too, but I really like how pretty the tattoos are.”

“Thanks. Um, you’re gonna need an appointment.” She pulls out her phone again, since it’s synced to the calendar Joseph makes them all keep, “lemme see....I have a big slot of time on Friday afternoon.”

The girl cocks her head, “That’s two days from now, right?”

“Yep.We can start at one if that works for you?”

“Sure, see you then!” She waves and then disappears under the water. A few moments later, a shimmering golden tail breaks the swell, seeming to wave once before submerging. Aubrey blinks, switches back to the bun cam.

“How do I tell Joseph I have to move my stuff outside to tattoo a mermaid?”

Dr. Harris Bonkers snuffles, but offers no further commentary.

------------------------------------------------------------

“Joseph, for the last time, you are not gonna hang around just to ask my client questions while I’m trying to work.”

“I don’t plan to, but we need to make sure everything, and I mean everything, is as sterile as we can manage. Doing this outside gives me hives as it is.” Joseph finishes setting up the pop-tent, the kind sun-phobic families take to the beach.

“C’mon, people gave each other traditional tattoos out in the open for centuries. It should be fine.”

Joseph makes an unsure noise, but leaves her in peace all the same. Before long a golden tail flashes out of the water as the mermaid swims towards the beach, the closest spot to the pier where they could actually set the tent and generator up. It’s right on the tide line, Duck having used his almanac to tell them whether Aubrey would be chasing the tide or fleeing from it if the appointment turns out to be long.

“Um, hi again.” She waves.

“Hello!” The mermaid slides up into the surf. When she sits up, Aubrey turns pink.

“Uh, do you, uh, want a swimsuit or something?” Her voice is embarrassingly high.

The mermaid looks down, then at Aubrey studiously looking elsewhere, and laughs, “Oh, right, I forgot humans don’t like it when we’re bare-chested.”

“I mean it’s not that we don’t like it-” Aubrey mumbles.

“Be right back.” She pushes back into the sea, returning a minute later wearing a bright green bikini top, “is that better?”

“Yep!” She replies too quickly, “Sorry, I, um, I’ve never worked on a mermaid before, kinda figured you guys wore seashells or sea stars or something?”

“You...you realize where that would put the seastar mouths, right?” The mermaid scoots up onto the beach, tail in the water and back on the inflatable recliner they borrowed from Kirbys apartment.

“Ooohouch, you’re right, fuck, sorry.” She grabs her flash binder, brought in case the mermaid didn’t have a design in mind.

The mermaid glances over her shoulder, smiling, “You’re cute when you blush.”

She maintains her professionalism, but only just, as the mermaid chooses her preferred design; a brightly colored swirl of planets and stars. For a newbie, she barely seems to register the needle, focused instead on studying Aubrey’s face and hands as she works. She learns that her name is Dani, that she’s one of several merfolk living near the pier, and that she’s observed Aubrey and her handiwork courtesy of a rock and a pair of salvaged binoculars.

“Oooh” Dani wiggles her tail happily when she sees the finished product, “it’s perfect, thank you so much Aubrey.”

“Glad you like it-oh, okay.” She stiffens as Dani rubs their cheeks together twice before pulling back.

“I’m supposed to keep it clean right?”

“Yeah, but I’m not sure how well saran wrap will hold up to sea water.”

A formerly empty Rose bottle thunks onto the sand. Dani grabs it, popping the make-shift cork off with her teeth.

“Ooh, Indrid sent me a special covering to keep it safe. And these must be for you.” She holds out two pearls.”

“Thanks” She’s more interested in watching the kissable lips covering razor sharp than the gems the mermaid gives her.

“Can I see you again?” Dani is halfway back in the water.

“Whenever you want. You’re a great client; you, um, you’re really nice to touch. Wait, um, I mean you take it really welllARGH, um, yes please come back.” Aubrey replies, tucking the second most valuable thing on the beach into her pocket and continuing to blush well after Dani has returned to the waves.

--------------------------------------------------------

“AHFUCK!”

“Sorry!” Dani gives a sheepish wave to Duck before turning to Aubrey, who got used to her popping out of the water five times ago, “are you free tomorrow?”

“Sure” even if she isn’t, she’ll happily reschedule another client for Dani’s sake, “do want to pick something from my flash?”

“Nope, this time Indrid designed something. It’s about the same size as this” she holds up the watercolor hermit crab on her right arm, “see you then?”

“Of course.” Aubrey waves goodbye, blows a kiss when Dani is out of sight.

She forgot Duck was still here.

“You got it bad, Lady Flame.”

“Shush, I saw you chatting to Indrid by the coffee shop yesterday.”

“....you can’t prove anythin.”

She holds up her phone, smirking, “Oh yes I can.”

--------------------------------------------

“Aubrey!”

She looks up, wondering who’s calling her name on the deserted beach. She brings Dr. Harris Bonkers down here on a leash late at night for enrichment for him and a break from the summer heat for her.

“Aubrey, over here!” Dani leaps through the surf until she;s only able to slide, “I thought it was you. Ohhhhhh” she squeals, “this must be Dr. Harris Bonkers. Hello cutie pie, aren’t you just so lovelyOH, oh he feels like an otter.” She rubs the rabbits head, causing him to creep towards the water, “you’re the second cutest thing on this beach, doctor.” She winks at Aubrey, then sits up, “can I introduce him to Ferdinand?”

Aubrey nods, excited to finally meet Dani’s pet; she only his name, but she’s expecting a seal, or maybe a crab.

What she gets is an octopus. The cephalopod winds a tentacle around her arm, investigating her.

“Aww, he likes you.” Dani sets the octopus down in shallow water, where it proceeds to stretch multiple limbs out to poke Dr. Harris Bonkers.

“Guess they’re having a playdate?” Dani scoots closer, resting her head on Aubrey’s shoulder.

Aubrey sets a hand on her tail, running her fingers up and down the scales as the mermaid sighs happily.

“As long as he doesn’t carry Dr. Harris Bonkers into the tidepools, they can hang out as long as you like.”

----------------------------------------------------------

“Dani? How many tattoos are you planning to get?” Aubrey looks up from where she’s outlining an octopus on Dani’s side.

“I haven’t decided yet. It’s really common for mers to have lots of piercings and tattoos. That’s why Indrid can leave Duck so many expensive tokens; he’s the most in-demand tattoo artist on the coast.”

“Neat! Wait-” she sits up, shutting off the gun, “your friend is a tattoo artist, but you kept coming here?”

“Yes.” Dani is still, save for the end of her tail, which vibrates nervously.

“Why?”

“Um, well, I, I really liked your style. Then I really liked you, and I wanted to keep seeing you…”

“Holy crap, do you keep getting tattoos because you think that’s the only way you’re able to see me?”

“Uhhuh.” Dani is bright pink from her cheeks to her waist as Aubrey scrambles to sit in front of her, “I mean, when you want to date someone, you’re only allowed to see them at their work until they say they want to date you too. Even us meeting on the beach a few weeks ago was pushing it, and I didn’t want you thinking I was pushy.”

“....Huh?”

“Do humans not have that rule?” Dani’s honey-colored eyes widen.

“Nope. It’s actually kinda rude to ask people out at work, because they can’t get away BUT” she hurriedly sets the gun aside, “but I make exceptions for super cute wonderful mermaids.”

“Oh. In that case-” Dani knocks her backwards with her tail and climbs atop her, kissing her so hard she wonders if you can die from a really good make-out session. When the salty kiss ends the mermaid continues peppering her face with kisses and flicking her tongue along her neck.

“Dani I, I’m loving all of this but if you mess up my ink I’m gonna be as annoyed as I can possibly be with a gorgeous mermaid feeling me up.”

“Crap, you’re right.” Dani sits back up, glancing at the half-done tattoo, "I really don't want to ruin your work. Desperate need to see you aside, I do love your style." She folds her hands back into her lap and readjusts onto the inflatable chair.

Aubrey crawls forward, kissing her sweetly, "Once we're done and you're all wrapped up, wanna join me on the beach for a little, um, late night picnic."

A teasing kiss, first to her nose and then to her lips, "I'd love to."

#danbrey #aubrey little/dani #taz amnesty #mermay #mermay fills