#the more it falls apart

[randomnameless]

Thinking about those posts I have with @yanderefairyangel about the crust system -

If crestless parents can have crested children, then why the fuck are crested heirs apparently so sought after, if their crestless siblings can also create crested heirs?

Look at Hanneman, his crestless sister had to pop out children until her death, because even if she lacked a crest, she might birth a crested child (it didn't work).

Compare to Sylvain's whining about women only wanted to get out with him to get his crest babies - but if it's crest babies we're talking about, then Miklan can get crested babies himself!

So, if people are valued due to their ability to produce crested heirs... being crestless isn't that much of social stigma, since being crestless when your parents had one means you have a chance of passing one to your child (see Lissa in FE13).

Imagine the shitstorm we could have had, if Dimitri, being Lambert's son, didn't have a crest at birth, but Dimitro, Rufus' kid, had one. Would Dimitro be the crown prince of Faerghus? Given how he has a crest... I'd say yes, but would that mean Dimitro lives with his uncle Lambert to receive a proper royal education ? Or he stays with his dad?

What if Dimitro is an ass like his father, and Faerhgians + the top vassals (Fraldarius, Gautier, etc) prefer Dimitri, what would happen ? A civil war?

Worse, what if both Dimitro and Dimitri have a crest of Blaiddyd, who sits on the throne? Dimitro is born to the eldest son, but Dimitri is born to the crested second son.

#fodlan nonsense #yep the more we think about Fodlan as it is presented by the game doylist wise and the characters watsonian wise #the more it falls apart #if even crestless people are able to get crested kids #why the fuck are they supposedly treated like trash if the most important is to get a crested kid? #lack of creativity here #random thoughs #crust system nonsense

[two-bit-socrates]

Nazir: I can accept Cicero being here but can you please do something about his dancing?

Me, The Listener: His dancing is literally 2/3s of the reason why I let him live.

#the elder scrolls: skyrim #skyrim #dragonborn #the elder scrolls #tes #tes v skyrim #dark brotherhood #cicero #i kinda like the dark brotherhood questline #but the more i think about it #the more it falls apart #especially since I learned that Lucien LaChance is a chatty spirit who reveals info #particularly that he knows the will of Sithis

[dravikso]

cotl fandom do we fw long fur narinder or should I kill him immediately

#how do you draw cats #the only reason I gave him long fur is because I tried to hide the fact that I can't draw cats #also got rid of his veil sorry it looked kind of stupid lol #don't look too hard at the drawing because the longer you look the more it falls apart lol #cotl Narinder #cotl toww #cult of the lamb #cotl fanart #fanart #art #my art #digital art

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag #writeblr #it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal #fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho) #healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy #im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage.... #1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind #and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes #2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception'' #3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.'' #idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh #im sure there are people who have this experience normally #but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists #when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band'' #edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful #once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large #but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry. #but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes #but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally. #i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes #people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism #but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet . #i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY #and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound. #but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in #i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too. #here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change #was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort) #choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL

[beescake]

shit. two dudes

#homestuck #sollux captor #karkat vantas #vioart #2023 #solkat #??? pitch ???? #<- making excuses to tag 💔 #ngl the more ppl say its impossible to woobify them #the more im like. no no listen as an enjoyer i NEED my goofy tsundere baka bl yaoi rare soft and tender #the kind that falls apart in my hands #sighs. the joy of shredding mean scathing characters down into pliant loving mush....

[cuddlytogas]

So I accidentally almost got into an argument on Twitter, and now I'm thinking about bad historical costuming tropes. Specifically, Action Hero Leather Pants.

See, I was light-heartedly pointing out the inaccuracies of the costumes in Black Sails, and someone came out of the woodwork to defend the show. The misunderstanding was that they thought I was dismissing the show just for its costumes, which I wasn't - I was simply pointing out that it can't entirely care about material history (meaning specifically physical objects/culture) if it treats its clothes like that.

But this person was slightly offended on behalf of their show - especially, quote, "And from a fan of OFMD, no less!" Which got me thinking - it's true! I can abide a lot more historical costuming inaccuracy from Our Flag than I can Black Sails or Vikings. And I don't think it's just because one has my blorbos in it. But really, when it comes down to it...

What is the difference between this and this?

Here's the thing. Leather pants in period dramas isn't new. You've got your Vikings, Tudors, Outlander, Pirates of the Caribbean, Once Upon a Time, Will, The Musketeers, even Shakespeare in Love - they love to shove people in leather and call it a day. But where does this come from?

Obviously we have the modern connotations. Modern leather clothes developed in a few subcultures: cowboys drew on Native American clothing. (Allegedly. This is a little beyond my purview, I haven't seen any solid evidence, and it sounds like the kind of fact that people repeat a lot but is based on an assumption. I wouldn't know, though.) Leather was used in some WWI and II uniforms.

But the big boom came in the mid-C20th in motorcycle, punk/goth, and gay subcultures, all intertwined with each other and the above. Motorcyclists wear leather as practical protective gear, and it gets picked up by rock and punk artists as a symbol of counterculture, and transferred to movie designs. It gets wrapped up in gay and kink communities, with even more countercultural and taboo meanings. By the late C20th, leather has entered mainstream fashion, but it still carries those references to goths, punks, BDSM, and motorbike gangs, to James Dean, Marlon Brando, and Mick Jagger. This is whence we get our Spikes and Dave Listers in 1980s/90s media, bad boys and working-class punks.

And some of the above "historical" design choices clearly build on these meanings. William Shakespeare is dressed in a black leather doublet to evoke the swaggering bad boy artist heartthrob, probably down on his luck. So is Kit Marlowe.

But the associations get a little fuzzier after that. Hook, with his eyeliner and jewellery, sure. King Henry, yeah, I see it. It's hideously ahistorical, but sure. But what about Jamie and Will and Ragnar, in their browns and shabby, battle-ready chic? Well, here we get the other strain of Bad Period Drama Leather.

See, designers like to point to history, but it's just not true. Leather armour, especially in the western/European world, is very, very rare, and not just because it decays faster than metal. (Yes, even in ancient Greece/Rome, despite many articles claiming that as the start of the leather armour trend!) It simply wasn't used a lot, because it's frankly useless at defending the body compared to metal. Leather was used as a backing for some splint armour pieces, and for belts, sheathes, and buckles, but it simply wasn't worn like the costumes above. It's heavy, uncomfortable, and hard to repair - it's simply not practical for a garment when you have perfectly comfortable, insulating, and widely available linen, wool, and cotton!

As far as I can see, the real influence on leather in period dramas is fantasy. Fantasy media has proliferated the idea of leather armour as the lightweight choice for rangers, elves, and rogues, a natural, quiet, flexible material, less flashy or restrictive than metal. And it is cheaper for a costume department to make, and easier for an actor to wear on set. It's in Dungeons and Dragons and Lord of the Rings, King Arthur, Runescape, and World of Warcraft.

And I think this is how we get to characters like Ragnar and Vane. This idea of leather as practical gear and light armour, it's fantasy, but it has this lineage, behind which sits cowboy chaps and bomber/flight jackets. It's usually brown compared to the punk bad boy's black, less shiny, and more often piecemeal or decorated. In fact, there's a great distinction between the two Period Leather Modes within the same piece of media: Robin Hood (2006)! Compare the brooding, fascist-coded villain Guy of Gisborne with the shabby, bow-wielding, forest-dwelling Robin:

So, back to the original question: What's the difference between Charles Vane in Black Sails, and Edward Teach in Our Flag Means Death?

Simply put, it's intention. There is nothing intentional about Vane's leather in Black Sails. It's not the only leather in the show, and it only says what all shabby period leather says, relying on the same tropes as fantasy armour: he's a bad boy and a fighter in workaday leather, poor, flexible, and practical. None of these connotations are based in reality or history, and they've been done countless times before. It's boring design, neither historically accurate nor particularly creative, but much the same as all the other shabby chic fighters on our screens. He has a broad lineage in Lord of the Rings and Pirates of the Caribbean and such, but that's it.

In Our Flag, however, the lineage is much, much more intentional. Ed is a direct homage to Mad Max, the costuming in which is both practical (Max is an ex-cop and road warrior), and draws on punk and kink designs to evoke a counterculture gone mad to the point of social breakdown, exploiting the thrill of the taboo to frighten and titillate the audience.

In particular, Ed is styled after Max in the second movie, having lost his family, been badly injured, and watched the world turn into an apocalypse. He's a broken man, withdrawn, violent, and deliberately cutting himself off from others to avoid getting hurt again. The plot of Mad Max 2 is him learning to open up and help others, making himself vulnerable to more loss, but more human in the process.

This ties directly into the themes of Our Flag - it's a deliberate intertext. Ed's emotional journey is also one from isolation and pain to vulnerability, community, and love. Mad Max (intentionally and unintentionally) explores themes of masculinity, violence, and power, while Max has become simplified in the popular imagination as a stoic, badass action hero rather than the more complex character he is, struggling with loss and humanity. Similarly, Our Flag explores masculinity, both textually (Stede is trying to build a less abusive pirate culture) and metatextually (the show champions complex, banal, and tender masculinities, especially when we're used to only seeing pirates in either gritty action movies or childish comedies).

Our Flag also draws on the specific countercultures of motorcycles, rockers, and gay/BDSM culture in its design and themes. Naturally, in such a queer show, one can't help but make the connection between leather pirates and leather daddies, and the design certainly nods at this, with its vests and studs. I always think about this guy, with his flat cap so reminiscient of gay leather fashions.

More overtly, though, Blackbeard and his crew are styled as both violent gangsters and countercultural rockstars. They rove the seas like a bikie gang, free and violent, and are seen as icons, bad boys and celebrities. Other pirates revere Blackbeard and wish they could be on his crew, while civilians are awed by his reputation, desperate for juicy, gory details.

This isn't all of why I like the costuming in Our Flag Means Death (especially season 1). Stede's outfits are by no means accurate, but they're a lot more accurate than most pirate media, and they're bright and colourful, with accurate and delightful silks, lace, velvets, and brocades, and lovely, puffy skirts on his jackets. Many of the Revenge crew wear recognisable sailor's trousers, and practical but bright, varied gear that easily conveys personality and flair. There is a surprising dedication to little details, like changing Ed's trousers to fall-fronts for a historical feel, Izzy's puffy sleeves, the handmade fringe on Lucius's red jacket, or the increasing absurdity of navy uniform cuffs between Nigel and Chauncey.

A really big one is the fact that they don't shy away from historical footwear! In almost every example above, we see the period drama's obsession with putting men in skinny jeans and bucket-top boots, but not only does Stede wear his little red-heeled shoes with stockings, but most of his crew, and the ordinary people of Barbados, wear low boots or pumps, and even rough, masculine characters like Pete wear knee breeches and bright colours. It's inaccurate, but at least it's a new kind of inaccuracy, that builds much more on actual historical fashions, and eschews the shortcuts of other, grittier period dramas in favour of colour and personality.

But also. At least it fucking says something with its leather.

#everyone say 'thank you togas' for not including a long tangent about evil rimmer in red dwarf 5x05 #Our Flag Means Death #Togas does meta #and yes these principles DO fall apart slightly in s2 and i DON'T like those costumes as much #don't get me wrong they're fun and gorgeous - but generally a bit less deep and more inaccurate. so. :( #I'm not sure this really says anything new about Our Flag but I just needed to get my thoughts out #i hate hate hate Gritty Period Drama costumes they're so boring and so ugly and so wrong #god bless OFMD for using more than 3 muted colours and actually putting men in heels (and not as a shorthand for rich/foppish villainy) <3 #looking at that Tudors still is insane like they really will go to any lengths to not make men feel like they've got bare legs XD #image descriptions in alt text #and yes i DID just sink about two hours into those so you'd better appreciate them

[victorianchildwithinternet]

i cant stop thinking about Grover and the way satyrs age differently and how he will slowly fall behind. About him seeing Annabeth and Percy grow, mature, come into adulthood and eventually die while he could never catch up to them.

Its not only that, but also the fact that they already know this. In the last olympian Percy remarks how alarmed he is at the fact that he is gaining a significant height over Grover. He knows this is only the begging. He knows that at some point he will be an adult, possibly with children, and Grover will still be a teenager.

And imagine Grover at Yancy academy, slowly becoming ACTUAL FRIENDS with Percy instead of being some homework to do to get his license as searcher. Because this kid is his age, they share interests. And maybe he didn't think about it back then, with the naive look of a 12 yr old that cant see what will come. But what if the other satyrs warned him of the dangers of it. What if, even though he tried to dismiss them, it slowly grew on him and became one of his biggest insecurities. What if he started to put Percabeth at arms lengths, trying to make the inevitable more manageable since at least it was his choice.

And while Percy would try to guess what he messed up with, Annabeth would. She would recognize what was scaring him and reasure him that it wouldnt happen.

And maybe they stayed friends through out most of their lives, but the gap would become increasingly bigger and bigger and even if they managed to stay friends for Annabeth and Percy's entire life times, he would still have to see his friends slowly get away as they died. And he still has like 200 more years to go. But even then he isnt mortal. He doesnt have a soul. He wont have some heartfelt reunion with them in the underworld. His time spent with them will actually be less than half the life he will live. And still he will miss them through out it all.

brb gonna go cry about Grover Underwood for a while.

#grover underwood #percy jackson #percy jackson spoilers #pjo spoilers #annabeth chase #grover and percy #pjo #This also makes me think about Grover's thoughts when Percy turned down immortality. At this point the fact that they will fall apart from #age is becoming more clear. Could there be some part of Grover that was hoping Percy would take the deal so he didnt have to think about #eventually loosing him? Did Grover ever #in his most selfish thoughts #recent him for shutting the option down?

[cutter-kirby]

okay guys if nothing else you have to respect philip’s commitment to the bit

#yeah finale was good! #I might have more coherent thoughts later #anyway yayyyy!!!!! #I love him falling apart and to the last second trying to lie his ass off #you gotta respect the grind #toh #the owl house #the owl house spoilers #also That Animation????? #YES????????? #watching and dreaming #toh spoilers #live kirbert reaction #1k #geez louise #(positive) #2k #3k

[howlsnteeth]

make it real 'cause anything's better than the way i feel right now

#hi i wanted to fuck around visually and did so <3 #cotl #cult of the lamb #cotl fanart #ascensionism by sleep token #blood #which i rarely tag but i mean this is a little more than usual #but yeah listen to that line being screamed in the song #purposefully made lamb's teeth fucked up because turning into a monster of a vessel #after a life of being a lamb #teeth that don't fit. horns that grow wrong. scars that either fade immediately or don't at all. bleeding from eyes. black bile #no wonder others saw narinder falling apart physically with that crown as a warning sign #anyway enjoy :>

[muzzleroars]

danse macabre

#ultrakill #gabriel #v1 #gabv1el #doodle tag #rise and fall au #fallen gabriel #love thinking about gabriel losing his mind for a minute after becoming a full fallen angel #where he just really indulges in his anger and pent up violence all for himself #he rebels against everything he ever was and how stifled he has been his entire achingly long existence #no more rules. no more grace. he's goring demons and tearing machines apart limb from limb #needless to say. v1 is NO moderating force lol #it loves running around like this with him far more reckless than it could afford to be before #and finding a love that engages in its cruelty with it to its full extent makes it just as bad #he does eventually come back to himself as this just isn't him #but i love them having a full villain era where they become actively avoided #(but hell won't let their prey get away...sad!)

[superfruitland]

without you the whole world falls apart.

#ok. one more. #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt movie #rottmnt casey jr #lee's art #before the world falls apart au #im so normal about this au #plagued by the visions (this au)

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

cookies!

#ethan winters #chris redfield #rosemary winters #rose winters #winterfield #i had another concept where they were making onigiri instead #chris would add too much filling and would have to add on more rice #and would end up with a huge rice ball thats falling apart #ethan would make a perfect one of course... rosemary needs the best of the best after all... #and meanwhile rosemary is making a bunch of little rice balls to make a snowmans lol #resident evil village #resident evil #resident evil 8 #resident evil fanart #rebhfun #re8

[azapofinspiration]

Chuuya who doesn’t let himself want things because he has to put everyone and everything else first, who feels like his own wants shouldn’t matter because he has power so he needs to be responsible and prioritize those weaker than him.

Dazai who doesn’t let himself want anything because the moment he gains it he will lose it, who can’t handle opening himself up to that kind of pain and vulnerability because he’s been taught that that is a weakness.

Both Dazai and Chuuya whose experiences tell them that the moment they want, everything begins to go wrong and they’ll lose the things they care about.

#nakahara chuuya #dazai osamu #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd fifteen #bsd stormbringer #bsd dark era #skk #soukoku #I know we talk about how that line suits D a lot but it goes with C’s experiences too #he lets himself want to learn more about his past and he loses both the sheep and later the flags #D wants human connections and friends and then everything falls apart and his friends are gone #another connection between these two #meta #my meta #bsd analysis #my posts

[7roaches]

posting my incorrect opinions @ night when nobody can see them

#my art #nightmare sans #dream sans #dreamtale #utmv #abuse tw #i think these r their internal dialogues i think this aspect of tgem coexists with their evil visage & good visage #like the mental equivalent of taking a bra off when u get home #theyre evil/good to others then theyre alone or comfy & they fall apart #i dont. fully belife that tho. i still have to oeel them apart & also revisit their lore #this is judt what i think theyd do based on daydreaming abour them fir. 6 years. & inevitably losing the plot a little #be so super niceys to me olease ibwill literaly cry & curbstomp u if u dont #also. forfot to elaborate on nm seeking means to an end of his life & how it afects his ‘work’. more on that later #boy why you so kaywhyess

[carouselunique]

Cinch had three charges in her care once, Celestia entrusted her with the day-to-day care of Prince Blueblood, the new Princess Cadence and her student Sunset Shimmer - running a kingdom is difficult enough alone without three young ponies to look after - so when Celestia is absent (often) that means Cinch was in charge of these three ponies. And while the matron of the castle was always rigid about rules and wanted her three charges to uphold her reputation and to build their own budding reputations high, she cared about them very much. You'd have to, spending your time with the same three young ponies for so long, guiding and teaching them to be their best...

By the time Ditzy came into the picture, Cinch was down to two charges. She refused to fail them the way she failed...

Well, with one down, there were two left and she cared so much she wouldn't let anyone ruin them, especially not themselves. Surely they would come to realize Cinch was only helping.

#my sketches #my little pony #mlp #equestria girls #eqg #sunset shimmer #abacus cinch #Princess Celestia #prince blueblood #ditzy doo #princess cadence #mlp fim #mlpfim #mlp g4 #my little pony friendship is magic #swap six #side stars au #(Doubt anyone will read the tags but if you do some bonus lore: #Sunset leaving meant Celestia decided to take over caring for her new student completely to try and fix her mistakes #so that's why Twilight isn't Cinch's responsibility and why she doesn't care for that one and whatever happens to her #but if Cinch was in the picture for Twilight she would NOT approve of her actions #not morally speaking Cinch is pretty firmly amoral #but Twilight would probably be a humiliating blight on her already tenuous reputation #so y'know - that's why Cinch is bothered with Blueblood and Cadence but not Twily) #Cinch is not a good person and she will not be receiving a redemption once things fall apart - she definitely screwed up these kids #but she does legitimately care about them its just she is such a damaged old mare that her help hurts them more often - her redemption #if she gets one - will definitely be therapy or sumn... #(also sorry for the art absence losing a big platform depressed me and also I'm a busy person but fuck it we ball)

[fumifooms]

Dad always said I was like him

Meijack and Chilchuck Tims Dungeon Meshi, Ryoko Kui

^ 1: Moony moonless sky, Fatima Aamer Bilal / 2: Bug like an angel, Mitski / 3: Woodtangle, Mary Ruefle / 4: The Third Hour of the Night, Frank Bidart / 5 & 6: FROM THE MAKERS OF "TWO-MOM ENERGY DRINK," IT'S "LET YOUR FATHER DIE ENERGY DRINK,", Daniel Lavery & Cecilia Corrigan / 7: Batman: Year Three (1989) / 8 & 9 : FROM THE MAKERS OF […], Daniel Lavery & Cecilia Corrigan / 10: Wilt, CJ the X / 11: How Do We Forgive Our Fathers, Dick Lourie / 12: Milk and honey, Rupi Kaur / 13: / 14: Moony moonless sky, Fatima Aamer Bilal / 15: Someday I’ll Love Ocean Vuong, Ocean Vuong / 16: untitled, joan tierney v 17: Drunk, The Living Tombstone / 18: unknown

When your father tried his best to provide for you but he worked all the time and even when he was home he was either tired or stressed and he’s always liked to get drunk to relax and cheer up. When you know he values work ethics and respectability so you grew up to be capable and quiet. And when he says you’re like him you’re sort of puzzled, does he really know you so little, or does he know himself so little? But you like the feeling of your father ruffling your hair so you accept it, and still you stand next to your mother just as silent and just as stoic as her during family gatherings. He leaves again and again and when your mother leaves him nothing changes, really. You wonder if it’s more telling that you know him better than he seems to himself or that you don’t know him as much as you wish you did, or that you don’t think about him all that much these days. Out of sight, out of mind. And he’s never really been there, even when he was there, after all.

#It’s ok they do get in touch again and he prob at least lives to 40 #Alright I’m ready to be normal about chilchuck again #Spoilers #I guess? #dungeon meshi #chilchuck tims #meijack #chilchuck’s family #meijack chils #Web weaving #alcoholism #cw alcohol #webweave #A couple more i liked are a rearview mirror we’re not as close as we appear line and this french one from #Kristina Gauthier-Landry that goes like hands full of trout running up to you / look what i caught look / how much you love me #And this other one about chocolate coins that a dad arriving from work in middle of the night gives the happy little daughter running up #And it’s so anticlimatic and about transactional relationships and oughh ough it’s a good book #I am Chil is a complex absentee father truther sorry. Idc go see my analyses if you want don’t argue w me here #posts for which i am the target audience #Oh oh another one : So were we close? Or was it just the big things that held us together and the small things that let us fall apart? #The word father rotted in my mouth #Bc it’s left there to rot get it get it……….. #Sigh. Like father alike daughter #I’m a truther that she’s more like her mom demeanor wise