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drxwsyni · 3 years

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genshin hc’s - what makes them snap

characters: Kaeya, Diluc, Childe anonymous asked: “could I request what makes kaeya, diluc and childe (separately) snap?” a/n: of course, ty for the request bby <3 warnings: physical & verbal abuse, injury, swearing, general yandere themes

Kaeya

• He snaps when you snap - that moment when you laugh in his face and call him pathetic for how hard he tries, yet still fails to be the person you need. Kaeya’s the one who should be finding joy in other’s conflict, and sometimes their suffering, not you. To have those harsh and truthful words shoved in his face in such a familiar manner breaks something inside of him that he didn’t even know existed.

• Kaeya realizes you’re right, he tries so hard to win you over, despite it being all for naught when his sadistic personality ruins things in the end. It was never supposed to be a problem though - you were supposed to just put up with him, because he refused to give you another option. No relationship is easy after all. And, he hoped that you’d be too scared of him to be so defying.

• Apparently that isn’t the case when you just keep going, calling him a parasite with how he’s leeched to your side, always ruining your chances of making friends in Mondstadt. Hell, at this point you should just leave the region all together, your reputation being tainted by his presence.

The second such words fall from your lips, a gloved hand comes down on your face, the sting shooting across your cheek.

“Shut your fucking mouth.”

You’d never heard such desperation in Kaeya’s tone before, never felt his strength first hand. If anything told you of the line you’d crossed, that’d be it. There’s a moment of silence between the two of you, in which you’re inwardly praying he’ll storm off to cool down. You don’t have to look at him to know the look of uncontained rage on his face, and you don’t try upon hearing him draw closer, boots loud against hard tile.

“Here I was thinking you’d finally learnt your place.” He didn’t bother restraining himself, a hand quickly gripping your upper arm in a painful, vice like hold. “Oh, but don’t worry―” with an alarming pace, Kaeya began practically towing you behind him towards your shared bedroom, “―I’ll do whatever is necessary to re-acquaint you, sweetheart.”

Diluc

• There’s not much you can do to deter Diluc. He’s painfully stubborn, your words not phasing him. He loves you too much to let you go, so there isn’t a single thing you could do or say to sway him.

• As such, it’s not really what you do that makes him snap, but what others do.

• An injury is what makes Diluc lose all self control. The second he takes his eyes off of you, gives you too much freedom - it nearly costs you your life.

• Wherever it is you go down, you’ll still wake up in a place none other than his residence, under the care of personal healers that he pays whatever sum needed to bring you back to good health, and to make sure they keep your condition a secret.

• Nobody knows where you’ve gone, and he intends to keep it that way. The mere thought of putting you in that kind of danger again, or losing you entirely - nothing makes Diluc more sick. Any length to keep you sealed off from the world isn’t too much, not after seeing you on death’s door.

• If you thought he was stubborn, controlling to no ends before, it’s only worsened tenfold now. He never wanted things to go this far, truly wishing for the day he’d have a normal and domestic relationship with you. That’s in the past now though, not even mad at the ways he must keep you in line, so as long as it means you’re safe at the end of the day

You’d actually managed to get pretty far this time, making it all the way to the front entrance of his manor. Unfortunately, your timing couldn’t have been any worse, Diluc swinging open the heavy wooden doors just as you reached for the handle.

It’s okay, you told yourself, there’ll always be a next time.

Now, as you plead for Diluc to calm down, having been sent into a fit if fiery rage seeing you outside your room, you're not too sure there will be a next time.

Finally, the man stills, taking a moment before regarding you with a glare that could kill. “No more chances - if you even so much as think of pulling something like this again, I’ll hurt you so bad you won’t be able to take a single step without my help.”

Childe

• Childe needs your attention like he needs to breathe. It’s unfortunate that his duties as a Harbinger often keep him away from you, and so the time he does get to spend in your presence is very precious.

• You learn quickly how he thrives off of getting a reaction from you, of being close and the feeling of your body against his. Depriving him of that is the only way to get to him. Childe doesn’t care all that much if you hate him, so as long as you’re not focusing on anyone else.

• At first, he’ll take you ignoring him as a challenge. A battle for dominance that he must win. And he tries hard in that battle - Childe is nothing if not a determined fighter. He might start out with innocent means to garner your attention, but that won’t last long.

• His constant teasing is bad, the far too intimate touches and heavily suggestive words whispered softly in your ear - but it’s nothing compared to the measures Childe will take should you continue to pretend he doesn’t exist.

• Starting fights with innocent people right in front of you, slaughtering his own soldiers should they disobey him - if it gets a reaction, he’s happy. Except he doesn’t realize it’s just pushing you away more.

• He snaps when you do the worst thing possible - try and leave him all together.

Even being the hardened warrior Childe is, he still gave pause from the intense emotional shock when you were nowhere to be seen in your shared bedroom. Hours later, his heart still beat a thousand miles per minute. He’d personally tracked you down, carried you home and chained you up.

You were finally paying attention to him, and he suspected it had something to do with the bloodbath you witnessed on the way back. Well, there was that, and the deep set look of unhingedness in Childe’s eyes.

He knew what he was doing - how he was scaring you. It’s not like it wasn’t obvious - what with the way you were shaking like a leaf in his lap. You both knew what was coming, how he’d make you regret ever leaving him, which likely made the wait the worst part.

For now, he wanted to bask in the effect he has on you. Of how it makes him feel powerful, seen after so long of being disregarded.

His perfect little darling, not a thought in your mind that didn’t revolve solely around Childe.

#yandere genshin impact #yandere genshin #yandere kaeya #yandere diluc #yandere childe #genshin impact x reader #tw abuse

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natsukitakama · 3 years

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Being in relationship with the weeping monk would include :

Author note : alright I know I promised to write about Merlin and the green knight and I will. I just couldn’t stop thinking about this . Also it’s been like three months since my last writing I hope I won’t disappoint you. I expect to work on my request as soon as possible ♡ Love u guys

I'll definetly write a Merlin and Green knights’ part

i do not own the gif credit to the owner

Warning : some mention of smut but nothing too serious / mention of trauma / Spoiler

A lot of patience, I cannot imagine how much trauma this man went through. Apparently he is the only survivor (or at least Ash are barely here anymore) from his species and believe during his whole life that he was damned, he should be ashamed about his true being. In addition he grew up into a fanatical church, so it might be difficult to get to know him especially if you are a fey

Unlike his « father » he doesn’t hate fey but believe they need to expel their darkness such as him and that’s why he is working hard for the church so he could earn his freedom and soul. But then he realized they were barely followed their own rule, monk aren’t supposed to kill children but his father does.

He felt betrayed and had no longer a place and a purpose to follow. I’m pretty sure he’ll follow squirrel since he does seem to like him. It will take time for him to trust you enough to even talk with you and it won’t help if you’re fey cause he won’t understand why you’re trying to be nice to him especially because of the killing he’s done for the church

If you want to get close to him just take your time, the man can be harsh and he’ll be on the defensive since his background with the church. It will take time but he will be nicer with you eventually

He tends to go nicer if you’re caring with him, always asking him how he is doing, if he is feeling well, proposing yourself to patch him or anything. He is a touch-starved adult man, and I believe he doesn’t have much love in his life neither from the church nor from his family (or barely since he was raised by Father)

When he will finally feel confortable enough around you, he’ll talk a lot about you from specific things such as what are you working on, how’s your training doing, to banality : anything to make you talk honestly. He just loves your voice it just calm him down everytime. He loves your voice, he really loves it.

He loves your smile too and would be jealous anytime he saw you smiling to anyone who isn’t him

Cause here’s the thing, he is a monk, he shouldn’t be materialist or anything but he can’t help : if there is something to know about Lancelot is that he does not share. Not even you.

Even if you’re not in relationship, he believes no one has the right to be next to you, he is working hard to earn that right so he’ll threaten ( sending death glare) anyone who’ll be too comfortable around you. I’m not joking about it this is man is possessive fight me on this.

At this point you would ask me, how does he fall in love with us ? Easy one : One night after a huge fight he was sitting near of a camp fire, everyone was already asleep too sore to bother extinguish the flames, everyone but you and him. As you were walking into your bed for the night you catch him staring at the fire, he looked focused and lost at the same time as if he were asking himself « what the hell i’m doing here ». You were wondering if he didn’t have a second thought, after all he joined you and squirrel not that long ago he might be still into the church’s philosophy. So you walked into his direction, determined to know what’s going on Lancelot’s mind. When you sat close to him he barely moves as if he was expecting you to do something like this.

At first you said nothing not knowing what to say to hurt him. But seeing him focused, looking as lost as a child, gave you strength to face him and his insecurities. So you asked him what’s wrong and if you could help in any way.

He didn’t say anything, but judging by his expression you knew he was looking at his word carefully.

« Do you think I am monster ? »

« What ? »

« Y/N do you think i’m monster ? »

« No of course not why would you say that ? »

He didn’t answer back instead he just stared at the fire and then you realized what was behind his question

« Lance’ look I can’t say that I know what you’re experiencing right know as much as I can’t say that I understand what you’re going through. But I know something Lance’ no matter what people would say about you, remember that me, Y/N do not see you as a monster quite contrary all I see right now is a broken man trying to find his path. »

« How can you say that ? I-I murdered a lot of us »

« But you’re trying to change, you did once to save squirrel and you’re trying again »

« How can you be so sure about it ? I still believe on the power of the church »

« Lance… Do you think I am monster ? Do I deserve to die ? »

« What ? No ! Of course not »

« See ? You’re changing and if you want another argument you never be so talkative before »

Hearing him chuckled told you you were successful for now at least. You knew he needed to take time because of everything he’s been through. You never noticed, but that day he realized by his quick answer that you mean something to him. He knew by his reaction that he would never be able to hurt you. You put faith on him while he couldn’t even believe in him, you were genuine with him and he knew that you meant everything you told him that.

That day the weeping monk decided that he’ll do everything in his power to make you happy even if he would need to stay away.

I believe he’ll still follow his moral and would still respect most of the rule he learnt from the church. But the moment he realized that you were his everything and that you might feel the same, well let’s say he forgot couple of rules (especially the one who prohibited marriage)

He is into marriage fight me on this

Being in relationship with him implies helping him when he feels down especially when is questioning is whole being as a person. Cause he is truly fucked up, he believes he doesn’t deserve to live, the church was supposed to be the only way to save him from damnation. Now all he can do is to rely on you.

He will need a tone of times

He also needs attention, but be careful cause the man got reputation and is pretty awkward with all those things since I believe no one was very careful and kind with him.

He is touch-starved meaning he would crave for attention, but he isn’t comfortable enough so there things he will tolerate in private while some things would be okay in public.

For example he doesn’t mind holding you hand (he loves it your hand is so small and feel so sweet against his calloused one) even in public especially if notices someone starring at you

He likes hug but don’t do frequently though. He was raised to become a monk, I believe he never received any mark of affection or barely so he is still a bit tense about you being physical with him.

He is a monk but he is still a man and well he got urges and he can’t focus on stopping those kind of thought when you’re holding him tightly, pressing your chest against him. But there is time when he just can’t help but needing to have you against him.

Same thing for kiss, it’s so intimate, so intoxicating it’s like you were the one in charge of his own body and mind. He is overwhelmed by way too many feelings at once, so kiss are only tolerated when you two are alone.

At this point, you’ll understand that this man is a virgin baby

And if we’re talking about sex well, he is a monk. Safe to say you would be his first and probably he is last. It will take a long time before he would even consider being intimate with you, it was one thing to betray the church but breaking his vows was quite another.

Kissing you or hugging you doesn’t make him feel bad in the meaning it wasn’t for him as if he was breaking one of his vows. I’m not saying that he is asexual but I’m sure he can live without having sex with someone (even if sometimes he feels the need to have you right here and then, he can control it he does it all the time).

If he feels like he could dedicate his whole life to you, well you feel it when you two would be intimate.

Let’s say he counterbalances his lack of experience by skills and a tone of worship, I can’t explain how he could do that, but the man is a worshiper (no punt intended).

He kisses and caresses a lot

When you two are linked, he expects you to be on the top in every way (especially because he is aware of his lack of experience and also because he turned him on to see you being in charge, more than he would like to admit)

During your first time he didn’t last as long as he expects to last, especially because he was overwhelmed by all the feelings and the love he could feel through you.

He tends to last longer after that

I didn’t underline it enough, but I think the man is pretty sensitive in all way. He may look like a cold soldier but he is doing a good job at internalize his feelings. Which could be a huge obstacle for a relationship cause he tends to not talk about his feeling hence the difficulty for you sometimes cause you don’t know what to do to make him feel comfortable enough to talk to you.

Don’t worry just give him time, remind him that you’re here to help him, that he is not alone. Let him go to you when he feels like it.

It will take time but it’ll be worth it : he is very carrying, he would love you in a way you would never expect someone to love you like this. He would be your friends, your lover, your protector.

Yeah because he is overprotecting don’t ever try to protest that’s a battle you won’t win : you’re too precious.

#Cursed Netflix #cursed #daniel sharman #the weeping monk #the weeping monk x reader #the weeping monk x you #Lancelot x reader #Lancelot x you #cursed Netflix headcanon #the weeping monk headcanon

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nebraska-is-a-myth · 3 years

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My Eret Headcanons

These are just my headcannons for C!Eret and the potential of them being a descendent of herobrine and what that could entail for his and Philza’s relationship. This keeps me up at night thinking about it, so you can read this and suffer with me.

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Eret met philza first out of them all.

It was a long long time ago when Phil was known as the fearless young warrior that had been the first to slay the mighty dragon. Before he had retired to become a shitty father.

They had met in the void: Phil was on the hunt for herobrine, determined to put a stop to the terror he and his army inflicted onto the overworld, and Eret had been born there, alone. When Eret was younger he remembers wandering alone in the void. Their family had cast them out a few days ago for something they honestly can't even remember, but they knew they could never return. The void was nice, it was calming. Eret was neither warm nor cold, neither hungry or full, she could feel sleep calling to her, but her legs strode on nonetheless. The void was known for being endless and bland, numbness seeped into his every being with each breath. Walking for eternity was an option Eret had been avoiding for some time now. But then Phil had appeared from the endless mist and he had been so kind, offering warm touches and happy smiles. Nothing Eret had experienced back home. Eret hadn't understood Phil back then, not yet being exposed to the language of the overworld. But when Phil held out a map that looked similar to the grand fortress of the void, Eret had paled and shook their head frantically. Phil had calmed the small creature enough to understand that their panicked whimpers had been a warning. Eret had only been a small child back then, so they clung to Phil’s leg when he started walking towards the direction of the palace, ignoring Erets incomprehenable blabbering. Phil was confused at first, but continued on walking when the little creature wouldn't detach itself from him. When Phil had gotten more uncomfortable, he shifted Eret onto his back with a little protest from the child. On the small journey, Phil had started to try and teach the little child a few touches of English. Eret had learnt how to say “philza” with a little difficulty, and Eret had responded with a noise that Phil had understood as “Alastair”. Before long they arrived at the fortress and Phil could sense Erets discomfort. Instead of going through the main entrance, Eret hurriedly lead Phil to a gap in the wall of the fortress and mumbled words of encouragement to his new friend. Phil handed ‘Alastair’ a shiny golden ring from a pocket in his robe and placed it in Erets small hands with a soft smile and a comforting embrace. Eret wasn't sure what was happening at first when Phil’s arms had wrapped around them, it was warm and Phil smelled nice. Contact wasn't something anyone back home considered appropriate outside of the family home, even then it was rare. So Eret melted into the touch of phils soft arms, having not been held since they were a toddler. Eret still wasn't sure what Phil was doing, but they decided they liked it. When Phil pulled away, Eret tilted their head, hoping he would understand their confusion of the action. They watched Phils eyebrows knit together and his smile falls only for a moment before softly repeating the word “Hug”. Eret nodded, saying the word back confidently, bringing a smile to Phils face. Phil brought Eret in for another hug before standing back up and nodding. Phil had looked happy, so Eret stayed put, understanding that Phil would come back for Eret and his ring.

After a while of waiting for philza’s return, Eret grew worried and made the decision to follow their new friend into the depths of the fortress. But by the time Eret made their way into the grand fortress, both Philza and the tyrant Herobrine that had ruled the land with an iron fist had disappeared, leaving only a glowing portal in the great hall where blood stained the floor. The whiring of the glowing portal intrigued Eret, having only seen these portals from behind heavily guarded gates where soldiers like their father had been sent off to war under the orders of Herobrine. Would it be safe if they went through? Would they be punished on the other side? Would they even survive the journey? Eret glances at the ring in their hands, the purple light of the portal glints off of the shiny metal. The ring is far too big to fit on any of Erets fingers, but Eret runs their fingertips across the beautiful inscription of what appears to be a magnificent pair of wings much like Philza’s. They cannot read the writing, but something deep down tells them that this meant something to Phil, it looks old and worn but it has memories, memories that Phil entrusted them to keep safe. Eret looks around at the big empty hall. The void was lonely, it was dark and endless, Phil had been the first soul they had seen since they had been cast out. Spending a lifetime alone was something nobody wanted, it was something Eret themselves feared the most. It’s decided then, Eret must go through the portal and find Philza, returning the golden ring to their new friend. Eret took in a deep breath of hazy void air and took a step into the swirling magic.

For a second Eret thinks they've made a mistake. They feel like the magic is twisting their insides into slush. Their eyes flutter closed for a second, clutching onto the ring and the obsidian beside them before their being involuntarily pushed out in a bright harsh light. Erets eyes snap shut, every time they try to peel their eyelids open they feel like someone is burning a hole into the back of their head. It hurts and they don't know where they are and they can feel panic rising in their chest. They’re scared. All they can do is curl into themselves and stroke their finger over the indentations across philza’s ring. The heavy breathing goes on for a while, the feeling of loneliness once again creeping up on them. That is until they feel something press against their shoulder. They flinch as it comes in contact with their skin, fear of attack taking over their actions. The touch comes again but softer this time, in the hopes that it may be Phil they allow it to guide them into a warmer, darker place. They fall over their feet a few times, but they make it nonetheless. When the light dulls enough for them to open their eyes, fear sparks through them once again. They find himself trapped behind rusty iron bars. They’ve been locked away. No, no this can't be happening. They want to go home, to the void, anywhere but the disgusting cell that reeks of death and ash. They mutter words that the guards definitely don't understand and in retaliation they shout back in a language much harsher than Phil had used. They take to shouting Philza’s name, hoping they would recognize it or the man himself would hear them. He doesn't. Eret is alone, they don't see philza again.

At least, not until november 16th. The message on her communicator brings back memories of a place Eret had buried a long time ago, but she doesn't have time to dwell on it because in a flash the ground beneath her feet is gone and a blast sends her flying off the ground. Eret lands with a thump and a twisted ankle, but he’s sure his injuries are only minor compared to those closer to the blast. They’re a good distance away from the town center but they can see techno and tommy in the distance shouting about something that Eret cant bring themselves to listen to. Their back rests against an old spruce tree, and they sit staring at their communicator.

Wilbur was dead.

A choked sob rises in Erets throat. There were too many thoughts racing through his head. Panicked voices scream at him that Phil is going to recognize him, that he’s going to see the light behind his sunglasses and demand for Erets exile or execution. No one else knew of her past, how she was born in the void, a hybrid pretending to fit in with the humans. The rational side of them knew that so many other people on the server were hybrids, but even then some people feared techno for his bloodlust, and bad for his demonic nature. Eret couldn't be locked in a cage again, not after she worked so hard to move on and forget her past. The fear of her past life fuels her irrationality. But Phil was never like that. No he remembers that period in the void clearly, he remembers warm hugs and soft touches, and the ring. Eret rubs his thumb over the engravings on the ring that now sits comfortably on one of his fingers and takes in a deep shallow breath. This ring had been his rock for the past however many years they spent in the overworld. Human time works different from time in the void, so it never really was their strong suit. But they remember the aching in their bones of being in uncomfortable positions for long periods, and the dirt under their fingernails after a long day of construction. Through it all Eret had their ring and memories of someone who cared for them, someone to remind them that things change, sometimes from the better and sometimes for the worse. But was that all just an illusion?

Phil had shown them kindness and compassion.

But Phil had also killed wilbur.

Everything comes crashing down on Eret all at once, the one thing stable they had in their life collapses on them and suffocates every hope they ever had. The ring burns on their finger, the metal now glinting with lies instead of promises of a better life. God they were so stupid. They knew the likeliness of ever finding Phil again were slim, let alone be remembered by the man, but that hope and longing of someone to love them kept them going all these years. And now that hope was going to be the death of them.

Eret hears the screams of Niki and his friends and pushes his worries to the back of his mind, right now he must fight for the remains of what once was his home.

That night as the fighting finally comes to an end, Eret makes a decision. He decides to distance himself from philza, not ready to face the pain of being forgotten or exiled. He wasn't particularly happy with isolating himself either, but fear does strange things to a person.

But then ghostbur comes to him with desires of bringing back Wilbur and of course Eret will do whatever she can to bring back her friend. Sure soot may have hated her guts, but Eret wants nothing more than to hug him and feel his presence again. Not that she disliked ghostbur, but the phantom was a painful reminder of what once was and what could never be. And of course Phil wants to get involved with the resurrection of his son, of course he does, so Eret pretends he doesn't know Phil past what others had said about the man in passing conversation. Phil seemingly does the same, referencing so kindly how “Alivebur had resented him” and for a second Eret thinks they’re going be found out, that their time is up. But it never happens, Phil remains oblivious and Eret is constantly on edge.

It’s gotten to the point where Erets anxiety completely takes over and before they know it they’re at Technos arctic base and Ranboo is whispering something into Phils ear.

“I can't in good conscience let you onto this property Eret.”

No no please, Eret needs to do this, Eret needs to do something good, they need to get wilbur back. They need to..

“You're a king, and kings have power over others. It’s nothing personal.”

It is personal, they know it is, it's what they all say. Phil doesn't trust them, ranboo dosent trust them. They need to prove themselves, they have to, they can't be alone again. They just can't.

Maybe, maybe if she shows phil her eyes, if she reminded phil of the times before the smp, the times before nations and wars and sides. Before any of this where Eret wasn't the traitorous king and Phil was still the angel of death. Maybe Phil would remember Alastair, the child who helped him in another lifetime, the child he made a promise to, a promise to keep them safe.

So Eret takes a chance, he takes a chance with Ranboo, deciding to trust the Enderman hybrid, and he takes a chance with phil. She takes off her glasses, her crown tumbling down into the snow after them, and she pleads with Phil to let her help. She pleads not to be left alone again.

But Phil looks right through them. He stares into their whitened eyes and pushes them away just like everyone else, whispering jokes to Ranboo as Eret walks away with tears rolling down their cheeks. The promise made all that time ago had meant nothing to the man who Eret yearned for the most, they were left alone with nothing but a ring and false promises once again. Eret may have thought themselves unlovable and helpless in that moment, but they knew they still had a duty to his friend. To the boy who needed a father most. She was going to get Wilbur back, not for herself, not for Phil, not for l’manburg, but for Fundy. So Eret wipes her tears and sets off for snowchester, Eret could prove to Phil she was worth something, that she was worth remembering.

Eret had met Philza first out of them all, but Phil was the first to forget them.

#the eret #eret #dream smp #philza #dream mcyt #mcyt #I just love c!eret #they fill 90% of my brain #nebraska speaks

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trassellynn · 4 years

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ABOUT THAT WRONG THING

Here’s the analysis I promised. *** CROOKED KINGDOM SPOILERS *** WHY WAS MATTHIAS HELVAR’S DEATH JUST WRONG? 1. THE WAY IT HAPPENED 1.1. The Hand of the Author “The Hand of the Author” is an expression that indicates how much we feel the presence of the author into the story, the moments in which they intervene to manipulate the events in a forced and unrealistic way instead of following the coherency of their own plots. Now, let’s think about the sequence of the scene: a) Matthias if left alone and unarmed at job done; b) the boy has been able to follow him despite the messy situation; c) Matthias decides not to defend himself and talks to him in a kind and totally reasonable manner; d) the boy shoots him anyway. This death is absolutely anti-climatic, forced and disrespectful for such a character and the scenes from chapter 38 to 40 seem to be completely disconnected from the rest of the story. It looks like the author (despite her statements) was going to finish the book and said : “Oh, no, I cannot end this story without killing at least one main character, let’s kill the one I think the readers like less!” Even though Matthias was the worst character to kill off, as I’m going to explain in Chapter 2, if the author desperately wanted to kill him, she could at least give him a more decent death, like, for example, making him sacrifice to save someone. 1.2. Confusing sequences Matthias is shot by the young drüskelle, but he is still able to run to Nina. What does this mean? Why does the boy let him go, after shooting him? I honestly doubt Matthias has killed him to escape. Maybe he has knocked him down, but that wouldn’t make more sense to the entire context. 1.3. Fjerdan mentality Matthias gives the young drüskelle valid reasons to put his gun down: he has no weapons and cannot go anywhere. Do Fjerdans, filled with hatred but also obsessed with honour and discipline, really teach their young soldiers to be blinded by anger and kill a wanted man (“Dead OR ALIVE”) who is unarmed and willing to cooperate? The boy could have become a Fjerdan hero, if he had brought Matthias as a prisoner to his companions, rather than shooting him for no reasons and then being also unable to prove he killed him. 1.4. Double standards An author cannot build an unrealistic plot armor to some characters (for example, Kaz, a limping boy, who defeats all the Dregs alone) and kill others in a totally “random” and anti-climatic way, at job done. As I say in my small guide “Five simple rules every author should know about characters’ deaths”, double standards compromise the logic and the coherency of the story. 2. THE WAY IT BREAKS BASIC NARRATIVE RULES 2. 1. Character development Matthias’ storyline is mainly focused on two topics: his relationship with Nina and his character development. He literally spends two books to work on himself, unlearning everything he was taught since he was a child and finding a new purpose based on his change of heart. When characters are made to evolve during the story, the most logical choice is to give them an opportunity to make their development useful and significant outside of their safe zone (for example, their group of friends). And, most important thing, an author should never kill their characters if they haven’t complete their development. And that’s why Matthias was the worst character to kill off at the end of Crooked Kingdom: first of all, he hadn’t fully complete his development (he was still very insecure during social interactions and was still fighting against crumbles of Fjerdan mentality); secondly, no one out of the Crows has seen his development, since the author made him fail during his first real attempt to demonstrate something. I think people would need practical demonstrations to make a change possible, it can’t really be enough for them to hear his story from Nina. It’s just not realistic. Killing Matthias in that way and in that moment, made the character uncompleted and his entire development vain. I’ll conclude the subchapter with a simple example: why do you think it was Jack to die in Titanic, instead of Rose? Because Jack was a complete character, while Rose was still completing her development and had to put it into practice. The criterion is the same. 2.2. Characters’ deaths and their impact on the story Authors owe respect to their characters and have to build their paths properly from the beginning to the end, to guarantee quality to the story. Unless they’re writing a story about random events of human life, they should kill characters only when their deaths make sense to the plot and can give a valuable contribute to other characters’ storylines. A story lacks of quality when characters (especially main characters) are killed just for shock value, to add unnecessary angst and suffering to other characters or because “I cannot give a happy ending to everyone, happy endings are for children”. Matthias’ death was anti-climatic, useless and has so little impact that, if a reader jumps chapters from 38 to 41, it almost seems nothing has changed. 2.3. The failure After everything Matthias did to change and evolve, the author made his first attempt to put in practice what he learnt a huge, undeserving failure. First of all, even though he is unarmed, Matthias is fully able to defeat the boy but he doesn’t do that, that means he chooses not to defend himself. He wants to give the boy a possibility, he wants to demonstrate that there’s still hope for Fjerda. And his faith is repaid with death. These kind of plot choices SOMETIMES (and not in this case) can make sense if written at the beginning or in the middle of a story, not at the ending, when everything seems to be resolved. What is the author trying to suggest us? Fjerdan people are hopeless? If Matthias hasn’t been able to persuade a young boy, who, despite his anger and hatred, should have a more “elastic” mind, how could it be possible to convince older people in Fjerda, who have lived with their beliefs for decades? Does the author really think it is realistic that Nina’s words will be heard by Fjerdans? I’m starting to think her and Matthias’ dream is just destined to fail… * SPOILER FROM NIKOLAI DUOLOGY * (Please, don’t mention me the Nikolai Duology, which I tried to read but I abandoned due to several reasons, one of them, I consider the Crows’ arc closed, after that ending, and I don't like the idea of using the group only as a "passage moment" for both a character and a major plot. And to be honest, I think it’s just not fair that the work Matthias started to change Fjerdans’ mentality would be finished by a character who is just similar to him (well, even too much similar) but hasn’t faced everything he went through with Nina. It sounds like Bardugo is trying to replace him and this is bad. 3. THE AUTHOR’S STATEMENTS And now, in the third and final part of my work, I’m going to report some statements the author said during interviews about this choice and explain why I cannot help but strongly disagree with her. 1. “Matthias didn’t deserve a happy ending because he spread too much hate, he had to pay.” Okay, first of all, Matthias didn’t just wake up one morning, deciding to spread hate for no reasons. Do we need to think about his background? 1. He had always been taught to fear Grishas and see them as monsters; 2. A group of those monsters killed his family and he has been taken by a man who took advantage of his trauma to turn him into a weapon. He received bad teachings (and not only from Jarl Brum, but also from Grisha people who burnt his family alive), he has also been able to unlearn those teaching and decide to do something to repair and make things better. About the “he had to pay” stuff, excuse me, but he has been tortured in Hellgate for a year, being forced to kill wolves, that were not only sacred to him, but also reminded him of his own pet wolf, and living with the belief that the girl he fell in love with had betrayed him. Wasn’t that enough? And, last but not less important, here we go again with double standards: Matthias, who understood his mistakes and was determined to fix them “didn’t deserve a happy ending,” but Kaz Brekker did? Kaz is a great character, but he also did terrible things and I’m sure he’ll never do anything to fix them because he’s too broken and rotten inside. That’s okay, not all the characters are made to have a great development, but statements like this, when we compare the two characters, just sound a bit incoherent. 2. “He has been killed by the younger version of himself” Does the author really think this is a great symbolism? Doesn’t she know that being killed by a younger version of yourself, especially after you went through a great redemption arc, just means “Regression”? She’s basically saying that it doesn’t matter if you worked hard to change and to fix your mistakes, you don’t deserve to be forgiven, you are your past and you’re destined to be destroyed by it (unless your name is Kaz Brekker). Past is a part of us, of course, we cannot change it and we can be hurt by it, but we cannot let it “kill” us. The message the author gave is just wrong and filled with extremist, unnecessary moralism. It definitely doesn’t fit the atmosphere of a Young Adult novel, which should promote progression, instead of regression. As I said, she also seems to be willing to demonstrate that Fjerdans are just evil and will never change. I wonder if Bardugo has ever seen “The Lion King”, because Rafiki would be very disappointed by all of this. 3. “I knew from the beginning I would have killed him off” Even though the way she killed him seems to demonstrate something different, Bardugo has always stated that she wanted to kill Matthias by the moment she created him. Okay, we can believe it, but I can still speak against this statement. How? I’m sure this thing has happened to many writers: we create characters and decidespecific endings for their storylines, but, while we’re writing, those characters “come to life” into our hands and they sometimes evolve out of our control and start to lead us to a different path. Since the story is made by our characters, we should follow the directions they take, for the sake of the plot: we shouldn’t listen to fanservice or to old plans, we should listen to our characters. That’s why it can happen we end up saving a character we were meant to kill of at the beginning, as well as killing a character we hadn’t plan to kill off. It is just wrong to stubbornly follow an old idea that doesn’t fit the story anymore, that’s why authors cannot use it as an excuse to justify their mistakes. (The finale of “How I Met Your Mother” is a great example to explain this concept). 4. CONCLUSIONS “Geez, what was that for?” - It doesn’t matter. It’s in the past. “Yeah, but it still hurts!” - Ah, yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or… learn from it. (“The Lion King”, 1994) Matthias wasn’t even running away from his past. He faced it. He wanted to do something about it. He was ready to rise from the ashes of his past and work for a better future. And those are all the reasons his death is just wrong from every kind of perspective: narrative, logic, symbolism. Matthias Helvar deserved better. Not only from his life, but also, and especially, from the author who created him. *** Hope you agree with me. Haters stay away, I won’t change my mind. Don’t make flame under my post. If you agree with me and like my work, feel free to share. Thanks for reading!

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fromthewifecage · 4 years

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Nursing the Kombatants/Kombatants with injuries or illness

Including Erron Black, Johnny Cage (both younger & older), Raiden, Bi-Han, Mileena and Kano.This is written with affection and there is angst amongst the comedy. I’ve put the Kano bit at the bottom so if you don’t like him you can ignore it. Erron Black: You’ve seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail? Erron is worse than the Black Knight. He’s taken you into the jungle near Kotal’s palaces. The lush foliage is full of exotic birds, flowers with delicate and alluring perfume that only stoke your desire to get to know Erron that bit better. It’s also full of terrifying beasts with too many teeth and claws, and whilst Erron manages to take down that… thing…. he doesn't come out unscathed. He’s spilling blood at an alarming rate, and he’s swaying on his feet, but “tis but a scratch” and “I’ve had worse”. You only manage to get him to sit his (magnificent) arse down and to let you tend to his (horrifying) wounds with the threat of taking away his hip flask. Luckily you’d packed your travel medikit and through sitting on his chest to stop him moving and several phials of superglue and all your steristrips, his leg is attached once again. Sort of. He insists on you kissing it better “but it’s your leg not your mouth” and then stupid idiot faints from shock (from the injury, your technique isn't that bad). Luckily Ermac has sensed something is wrong and appears with a small pack of servants and a litter to carry Erron back to the palace. 3 days after Erron has recovered he invites you back into the jungle. More kombatants after the cut!

Johnny Cage: Younger!Johnny is enough to make you (almost) walk out and never come back. The man is a BABY. He’s admittedly a very cute baby when he’s pouting and shiny eyed and holding out his hand to show you the tiny bruise. One day he’ll tell you he behaves like this to try to get some attention from his parents, they’d loved him when he was small, but as he grew older they gave him less and less attention so acting like a younger child was the only way he knew how to get attention and care. He’s taken you picnicking and you’re both rolling down the hill, laughing like hyenas. At the bottom he twists his ankle. It swells up immediately and starts to turn purple. He’s really trying not to cry, and you actually feel sorry for him because a twisted ankle hurts like a bitch. Whilst you go searching for a branch to use as a crutch, he has a little sniffle, and the red eyes are testament to this when you return. But he really does try not to yelp too much and too loudly when you’re slowly walking (hobbling) back to the car. After you’ve got him back to the medi-centre and he’s got the attention of all the staff, you make your way back to your quarters. The next morning you’re awoken by flower deliveries, chocolate deliveries and tweet after tweet devoted to your ‘bravery upon saving him’. Older!Johnny soon stopped with the baby routine when he actually had a baby. Sonya wasn't going to tend to him and Cassie, so he soon bucked up his ideas. He can deal with minor injuries no problem, but if you’re with him he’s still going to pull the pout and “kiss it better” routine. He’s learnt to love his scars (older action stars need a few scars, right?) He’s taken you to an intimate restaurant for dinner, and you’re walking back to the car when a bunch of drunk idiots start yelling that he’s a washed-up fraud. Johnny ignores them, holding your hand a little tighter when he sees you upset and scared. Then the idiots attack him, and he puts them down, hard, but gets caught across the arm with crowbar. He tries laughing through the pain but you know it’s bad when the jokes stop. He lets you cradle him gently whilst you wait for the Police and Ambulance, and once the morphine has kicked in (administered by the star struck paramedic), he admits you’re his beautiful bunny and he loves you. Raiden: Pain and injury are nothing when the fate of the realms it at stake! Or so Raiden claimed. The man is SUCH a baby. Gods get colds too (when they’re run down after severe exertion such as fighting Shinnok). He makes SO much fuss you’d think it was the end of times. He must have tea and he must have it now. He must have softer tissues, and he must have them now. You’ve run out of lemons and there is no more ginger tea left, and Sainsbury’s can’t deliver until tomorrow. You are so fucked. Fujin has disappeared because he KNOWS how Raiden gets when he’s sick and he’s not going through that again. Raiden is in bed for 5 days. 5 LONG days. The floor of his bedroom is covered in more tissues than a 14 year old boy’s. It’s only when you pointedly mutter loud enough for Raiden to hear that “Shinnok would be a better patient than you” that Raiden bucks his ideas up and stops whinging quite so much. He apologises for being such a bad patient, and his puppy-dog eyes (who taught him that? That’s not fair!) are impressively moving enough that you sigh and let him hug you tightly. You also make sure to keep a secret supply of tea and tissues just in case you have to go through that again. Mileena: Being cared for is an alien concept to Mileena. If she injured herself, Shang Tsung would punish her with a cruel spell and his sharp tongue, and she’d be left to treat her wounds by herself. After she left his ‘care’, Mileena didn’t expect to find someone to treat her with kindness, to be tender and hold her hand when it all got too much. Yet again, Kotal tries to strike at Mileena. She strikes down his forces with blinding ferocity but pays little heed to her own safety, so when she returns to you, battered, bruised and bloody, she’s puzzled at your concern. At first she tries to brush you aside, but you won’t take no for an answer. You take your time to clean and bind her wounds, kissing the bandage gently each time, your touch as gentle as you can be. When you bind her final wound, she looks at you with tears in her eyes. All of a sudden she knows what she’s missed, and she files away the anger the flares at Shang Tsung and Shao Kahn, she will use that against them when the time comes. For now, she’s going to demand more sweet words and gentle kisses from you. Bi-Han: Growing up in the Lin-Kuei is hard. There are no comforting hugs or someone to “kiss it better”, no-one to wipe away those tears and tell you how brave you are. Unless you’re dying, you can deal with it yourself and you’d better be quiet about it. Bi-Han learnt to be quiet after he was punished for crying when he broke his wrist. Kuai watching open-mouthed as Bi-Han got higher and higher up the snow covered tree until he missed his footing and fell, landing with a scream. Grandmaster told Bi-Han that the break was punishment for disobeying the rules. Bi-Han staggers home 2 days late and you’ve been so worried about him. His skin is white as chalk and clammy to the touch. He’s burning up, but shrugs away your concerns. He slumps against the bathroom wall during the shower he insisted he needed, and thank the Gods you hear the sound of the curtain rail breaking. You stroke his head whilst you wait for the ambulance, talking all the time to reassure him you’re there, and he’ll be ok. He doesn’t want you visiting him in the hospital, but you ignore him and stay every day well beyond official visiting hours. He’s been home 3 days when he takes your hand and presses a kiss to your forehead, whispering his love to you. No-one ever stayed with him or cared for him like you. He really does love you. Kano: He’s been a bad boy for a long time, so he’s had more than his fair share of injuries. He’s got a very high pain threshold, and he uses it to his advantage in a fight. When his opponent sees Kano shrug off injuries only to roar and jump back into the fray, they literally shit themselves. You’re partying in the Fight Club when SF burst through the front doors. Most of the patrons scream and run blindly through smoke bombs thrown to try to disguise that SF have likely too few bodies to take Kano down. Kano smiles and carries on downing his pint.

He takes down soldiers with knives, fists and feet, but gets caught by a baton to the side of his head. Luckily his cybernetic eye takes much of the blow, but his vision goes strange and his head is ringing. It’s him versus the last soldier. Kano staggers to his feet whilst you hide under the table, and with every thud of fist against flesh you jump, preying it’s not Kano. The soldier falls and Kano calls to you, staggering back onto his seat, grabbing a beer on the way. He hands you his phone and asks you to call his ‘doctor’, pauses long enough to kiss you, down the beer, then passes out on your shoulder. The doctor patches him up, no long-term harm done. And whilst still in the hospital bed, Kano has you steal a white coat and perform several medicals on him. After all, it wasn’t his dick that got hurt, was it?

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zayray030 · 4 years

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Why can't you understand? I didn't want this.

Summary: Bruce wanted to cry. Or die. Whichever came first really. He was just so tired. Why couldn't anyone understand that he didn't want his kids to have this life? Why couldn't his own kids understand that?

Bruce wanted to cry. Or die. Whichever came first really because he really wanted to get out of the cave.

The reason why he didn't want to be in the cave was because of his kids.

Now, he loves his kids. He never wants anything bad to happen. He never wants to see them cry or get hurt. He just wants to see them happy and living happy normal lives. And if he actually had a say in it, then they would have normal lives. But they were all dumbasses. Lovable dumbasses, but dumbasses non the less.

Currently they were all ganging up on him for taking them into this life.

It had all started when Bruce was typing in the report for the night. He had the costume off and the place was silent. Normally meaning that it was going to be interrupted one way or another and one of his kids will storm away from him or in tears and shouting at him. Well he got the first one right, just not the last one. He would be the one in tears shouting at them.

“Hey, Bruce!” exclaimed his oldest son as he walked into the cave, while Barbara wheeled along with him she gave him a small smile before going back talking to Dick.

Bruce just gave a small nod of acknowledgement and continued typing on the batcomputer. Soon, all the other others began joining in and they were all huddled around Barbara and Dick. Normally such behaviour would have worried Bruce, considering the fact that a fight would have broken out now, but he didn't pay attention to it. He really needed to finish his report to get some rest for tomorrow.

How naive could he be to hope it would be that simple?

“Hey Bruce? I have a question.” said Tim as he walked over to him, the others following suit behind him, their faces holding anything but innocence.

“I'm sure it can wait, Tim. I have to finish this report and-” started to say Bruce before he was cut off by Jason.

“Nah it can't wait, actually old man.” snapped his second oldest son as he crossed his arms and glared at Bruce. So it was going to be one of those nights. Bruce really didn't want to get onto a fight with his son, especially after they've been doing so well.

“I just need to finish this report. I'm sure he can ask one of you.” replied Bruce, still focusing his attention on the screen and trying to remain calm. However, it was proving harder than he thought. Maybe he should have listened to Alfred when he said to go and sleep earlier.

“He can't exactly ask us on why you insist on having child soldiers.” Dick replied, slightly peaceful. He was clearly trying to be the meditator while also making it obvious on whose side he was on. However Bruce could really care less right now. He was just trying to stop himself from crying as the question was asked again.

Why can't they see he didn't want this life for any of them? Why can't they understand it wasn't completely his fault?

“Grayson. Say it nicer.” snapped Damian. Even his own son thought he had child soldiers. He would have at least thought he would be on his side, but no such luck.

Bruce fully turned from the computer, his report half finished. He would continue it later when everyone storms out after he accidentally says something emotionally constipated.

“We are not going to have this conversation right-” tried to say Bruce but he was cut off again, this time by Barbara. She looked slightly guilty by what she was going to say, but it was also obvious that she had wanted to say it for a long time.

“I'm sorry Bruce, but we need to have this conversation right now. It's not safe for you to put a child in a costume and force them to go out and save Gotham. It's not sane either.” she added. That little…

“I-” he tried to say something, anything, to defend himself, but he was interrupted yet again. This time by Cassandra. Even her? She thought he would willingly put children in harm's way? His heart started breaking even more.

“I love dad, but dad hurt others.” she said with the limited words she had learnt. Bruce had to hold back a sob at the fact his daughter said she loved him but had yet again thought that he would harm a child.

“If you let-” tried to explain Bruce. He just wanted to explain that he hadn't wanted all of them to go through this shit. He had wanted them to stay happy and love others as much as he loved them. Why couldn't they see that?

“Let you what? Kill another child in your regime. It's bad enough it happened to me, but it also happened to others because you forced them into this shit show.” snarled Jason, looking at Bruce like he was worse that the scum that he fought nightly. Bruce felt his heart crack even more at the look but he kept his face stoic.

“Would you ju-” tried Bruce again, his temper rising. But instead of steam wanting to come out, it was tears. However he was interrupted by Duke. Why did they have to turn Duke? Duke and him were finally connecting. He may never be able to replace his parents, but he could at least be a good guardian.

“Sorry boss, but why? Like yeah, I get it's hard to navigate life at night, but they were just kids.” he asked, looking at him in disappointment. Bruce felt his heart cracking even further but he just continued to remain stoic.

“Can I just-” he tried to snap but Stephanie cut him off. Poor, sweet Stephanie. The one who had the most horrible relationship with him when she was Robin.

“No, you don't get to be pissed with us when it's your fault for starting this fuckery.” snapped Stephanie. Bruce wanted to cry or hit something, say it wasn't his fault, but he just took it. That's at least until Dick’s comment.

“I mean, you had to weaponize my childhood to start this ridiculous thing-” but Bruce cut him off. If they where going to demand for answers then they would fucking receive.

“Excuse me!?!” he snapped at his oldest,causing a look of surprise to be etched on his face. “I didn't even allow you to go out at night.” when it looked like he was going to get interrupted, he just raised his voice. “You were the dumbass to put on a bright red tunic, green panties and a neon yellow cape on. You decided to go out there and try to find your parents killer and kill him. You decided, without any sort of training, to go out there and find a mob boss, who has more experience than you. I told you multiple times not to. However you wouldn't fucking listen so I decided to make sure you didn't die in the fucking process!!” he yelled at Dick, who just stood there, shocked and if he looked just slightly longer he would have noticed the guilt, but he was already moving on to Barbara.

“You decided after solving one fucking mystery at a fucking Halloween party, while dressed in a ridiculous costume, that you would start fighting crime. You continued trying to fight crime, even after I told you not to. You continued even after I threatened to tell your father. I just fucking decide to make sure that you didn't die, giving the commissioner major heartbreak, so be fucking grateful.” be snarled at Barbara. The normally quick witted woman had nothing to say, just stared at Bruce guiltily. He could barely give a shit as he turned to Jason.

“You decided to steal the tires of the fucking batmobile when you saw it, instead of turning around and going somewhere else. You decided to hit me with a tire iron, instead of just giving me my fucking tires back.” he practically screamed at Jason. Jason was looking at Bruce in horror and that's when he realised that tears were running down his face. Fuck, he hadn't even felt it. “I tried teaching you how to put your size to your advantage by using speed, but you fucking insisted just to punch the villains.”

He then turned to Tim, on a roll now. “I told you to fucking go home! I told you not go out there on the streets of Gotham and fight crime. But NO!! You had to fucking take pictures of me and insist that you be my partner even though you had a good life going for you. You had no fucking training prior and since you were obviously not going to fucking listen to me, I decided that the next best thing was to fucking teach you how to defend yourself.” he screamed at Tim. The coffee addict had the sense to look down guilty and look ashamed of himself. But he didn't care. They asked and he would fucking deliver.

“You decided to instead of turning your father to cops, when finding out he was a supervillian, to dress up in a purple costume and fucking fight crime, even after I told you to fucking go home. Even after I was a dick to you, you decided to stay and not take a fucking hint!” shouted Bruce at Stephanie as he turned to her, not caring at the fact that he was crying openly now. Stephanie just stared at him, horror growing in her eyes.

“I told you not to go to Shiva, but you didn't listen to me! I told you not to insert yourself into dangerous situations but you fucking decided to ignore me and go out to Hong Kong!” he yelled at Cassandra. He didn't bother lowering his voice. He was upset and he wanted his mother telling him that he was doing good and he wanted his dad telling him that he'll protect him.

Cass looked at him with wide eyes but Bruce didn't have it in him to care. He just wanted to go to sleep. He quickly turned to his blood son and softened just the tiniest bits.

“I benched you multiple times after I found out your mother had put a hit on you but you decided to change your name to Red Bird and continue to fight crime! Even after I benched you multiple times and explained to you the dangers of going out there. I told you to stay in the cave and away from the evil zombies invading Gotham but you didn't fucking listen! And that's not even scratching the surface!” he yelled at his son. Damian wasn't crying, but he was frowning and looking mighty guilty but Bruce didn't care. He wanted his own dad and he wanted him now.

“You decided to challenge the riddler when you were barely even in the double digits!” he snapped, turning to the newest member of the family and Duke had the sense to look ashamed of himself as he rubbed the back of his neck. “You continued to fight crime, even after I told you to leave it to the professionals and not to get involved with his shit! But you wouldn't listen, so I had to turn you into a professional!”

“I may not have been the best fucking parent out there, but I damn well tried to make sure you lot didn't die! Was I the best at it? No! But I fucking tried to stop you! So don't you fucking dare say I put you in that costume willingly!” he finally screamed. “I just wanted to be a normal dad! I just wanted to give you guys the experience I never had! I tried my hardest to be a good dad to you all, like my parents were to me.”

Slowly he was trailing off, mostly just half sobs and barely even standing, already on the floor, face in his hands as he cried.

Suddenly he felt small arms wrap around him and he didn't have to be the World's Greatest Detective to know it was Damian.

“I apologise to have caused you such great distress, father.” mumbled Damian into his chest. Bruce didn't care, he just cried into his son's hair.

Slowly, other arms wrapped around his shaking figure and there were a multitude of sorrys coming, but he couldn't pinpoint who said what, he was just so, so, so tired.

Later on he woke up on his bed, but he felt a small weight on his chest. Looking down, he saw Damian and when he looked around he saw the rest of his children. Even Barbara was on the bed.

Looking around, he saw Alfred walking in and suddenly everything that had happened last night hit him like a train. Alfred just looked at him in sadness and handed him a cookie.

“I see you have decided to join the land of the living, Master Bruce.” said Alfred, the butler not breaking out of his stoic tone and the only way to know that he was actually worried was if you knew him personally.

He just hummed slightly. “Shit, Alfred I had a meeting and-” Bruce began as he tried to discreetly move Damian, however the child was not budging whatsoever.

“Don't worry, Master Bruce. Everything has been taken care of already. You have no work to do for a week and the children have decided, for their own punishment, to take care of everything for you.” replied Alfred already pushing the man down. Bruce just grumbled and ate his cookie.

“What am I supposed to say Alfred? Nothing I say is going to take back how awf-” began Bruce as sudden guilt began to consume him.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, Master Bruce. If anything, the children and I have to give our apologies for berating you for so long.” Alfred said, cutting him off. Alfred had a slightly guilty look at the confession and Bruce wanted to soothe him but he was tired and wanted to go to sleep.

“Sleep some more, Master Bruce. I will inform you if you need to worry about anything.” said Alfred. The old butler walked out but cast one last mournful look behind his back.

“He's right you know.” said a muted voice to his right. Bruce turned around and his eyes caught Jason's blue green eyes, which were swimming with guilt.

Bruce didn't say anything, just draped an arm around Jason and brought him closer to him. He felt his jumper wetten a bit but he didn't care. He just let his son cry on his shoulder. Soon all of his other siblings started to wake up and when they all turned to look at Bruce, he could see the immense guilt in their faces.

There were a lot of sorrys going around and when finally he heard Damian say sorry he spoke.

“We all said hurtful things last night. And it might take a while for us all to get back to where we were, but I forgive you all.”said Bruce. He could still feel their guilt but they'd deal with it. Like a family this time.

“Get some sleep old man.” Dick finally said.

“Yeah! I've already taken care of WE.” said Tim.

“Just get some sleep Bruce.” said Stephanie.

"Sleep, father." said his son nuzzling into him.

Soon he was lulled by his children's quiet voices and his world was consumed in darkness

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demivampirew · 4 years

Text

Don’t judge a book by its cover Chapter 6 (final chapter)

A Cap. Syverson story.

Triggers: Heartbreak ;use of curse words; crying; puking.

Synopsis: Rebeca is an Argentinian girl who a few months ago moved to the USA (Washington D.C) to study in university thanks to a scholarship that she was granted. She’s lonely. People don’t treat her well. Some could be understood but most of them just hate her for being a foreigner. She meets Syverson because he’s a man from the South and she has not had a good experience with people from there, but she may find out at the end that she shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Tag: lunedelorient

You’ll find a note at the end of the chapter, which is an explanation of what is being said when the * appears.

Things couldn't be better for Rebeca. She had been dating a wonderful man for the last three months and he treated her like a true queen. She passed all her exams with high grades and now was rightfully enjoying her spring break. Now she had time to hang out with her friend Danielle and even would have double dates with her and her girlfriend Phoebe. She couldn't be happier. One morning she woke up feeling like hell. She had to run to the bathroom to puke. At first, she thought that could have been something that she ate the day before that settled badly in her stomach, but after several days of waking up nauseous and feeling awful but then feeling better the rest of the day, she realized that something else was going on. She decided to take a pregnancy test - two actually, for more certainty- at both gave positive as a result. She was expecting a baby. They usually were careful when having sex, but there were two separate occasions in which they didn't use a condom. She was nervous. What would happen now? Could she lose her scholarship due to her pregnancy? What if they wanted to kick her out of the country and separate her from the child once he had him/her? Would Sy be happy with the news? Should she have the baby at all? The only answer she knew was the last one and it was yes; that baby would be her's and Sy's. She needed now to find out how he felt about it. As long as he was ok with the baby, she'd know that everything was going to be ok, because he always going to be there for her, to help her solved any troubling situation she might be in. After work, she went straight to Sy's house to share the news with him. She was quite nervous, but also excited. If he was happy with the news, then she would get the family she always dream of. She entered the house using the key he gave her and once inside the house she searched for her boyfriend. She found him sitting in the couch, crossing both on his arms in his chest, looking at the space in front of him, lost in his thoughts. Something bad had happened, she could feel it. She caught his attention and he looked at her in silence for a few moments. "Fuck" he cursed and she knew that whatever happened, it was really bad. He sighed and asked her to sit in the couch with him, that he needed to talk to her. - I got the call - he said with sadness. No further explanation was necessary, she knew exactly what that meant. - How long? - she questioned. - Maybe a year or more. They need me there, it has to be me. The locals already know me, I'm the only one who might bring some peace there. - he answered. - I knew I shouldn't have started a relationship. I knew that this day would come in eventually. I didn't want to hurt you, babe.- he apologized. - What are you saying? It's a year or maybe a bit more. I'll wait for you. - Beca assured him - Darling, I may never come back, that's how things go there. I tell you is a year and might end being more. Last time I was supposed to be only for a few months and ended up staying for three years. That's a lot of time. You're young, you cannot spend the rest of your days waiting for a man that might never come back. - he tried to reason with her. - You're breaking up with me then? - she asked with tears on her eyes. - I am, yes. This is best for you. - You promised me that you'll always be going to be there to protect me, but you were lying. You're going to leave me alone.- she recriminated him. - I'm really sorry, baby. It hurts my soul knowing that I'll have to leave you, but I have to go. I have to. I don't have another choice. - But you do. You could leave and found another job and never go back, but you want to. You want to be there because you want to save people, is in your nature. That's who you are. You want to help even if it costs you everything. - she replied, filled with sadness. She stood up a walk to the door with the intentions to leave. He followed her. - Beca, stop. It's late, don't go. It can be dangerous. - he pleaded her to stay the night. She wanted to act like a stubborn child and just leave, but she knew he was right. I was nighttime already and was dark outside. And she needed to think in the baby. "the baby" she thought, reminding herself that now she was going to be alone in this predicament. She was going to be a single mother. She accepted to stay, but she would sleep in the couch, he tried to persuade her to change places, so she would sleep in the bed and him on the couch, but he knew that'd be a waste of energy, she was too stubborn to listen. She spent at least two hours crying silently and thinking in all the mess she was caught on. She was going to have a child in a country that wasn't her own and probably wouldn't want her, an inmigrant with a study visa, to have an American kid. She would probably lose her visa and her job because there was no way she could study and work with a baby and also would not be able to afford childcare. There was only one solution she could find: she needed to go back to her country. There, her family would help her and she would be able to study in her former university and work while her parents looked after the baby. That was the only solution. Then she thought about Sy; the fact that she'd probably never see him again and how he could even die in the battlefield. She got up from the couch, went into the bedroom and saw that he was awake, probably thinking as much as she was. As soon as he saw her, he sat on the bed and stared at her. First, she looked mad at him, but then she started to cry and he extended both of his arms, waiting for her to accommodate herself in his chest so he could hug her. After a bit, she felt a little bit better. She looked into his eyes and kissed him. If that was the last time she would ever see him, she wanted to be a night that neither would forget. A proper goodbye. Neither of them spoke again, they let their bodies do the talking. He made love to her for the very last time, taking the sweet taste of her lips with him forever in his heart. ----------------------------------------------------------- Two years later Syverson was back from the Middle East. He was promoted and now he would never have to come back there again. He was ready to settle down alive and normal life. He would help train new soldiers and would help the new captain there from America, giving orders of how to proceed, but he would never go back. The first thing that crossed into his mind, the main reason he fought to never go back, was to see Rebeca. She was on his mind constantly. There wasn't a single day he wouldn't think of her or dream with her. He planned to search for her, and if she hadn't moved on with her life, he would beg her to take him back. She was his everything. He went to her place and found a young man living there. The gentleman told him that he never meet the former tenant of that house and that he's been living there for over a year and a half. Syverson then looked for her in the grocery store, but she wasn't there either. Another girl was working there, who told him that the owners of the store were on vacations and that she never meet any former employee and that she had been working there for a few months. College was his last resource. He waited for her to get out of the building, but that never happened. After the place was almost empty, he lost his hope in seeing her. He was about to leave when he saw a familiar face leaving the place. - Danielle! - he called at the girl. She turned around and recognized him immediately. - Sy!- she greeted him, surprised to see him.- How are you? - I'm fine. How are you? - he asked politely - I'm great, thanks. - she replied- What are you doing here? - I'm looking for Beca. I've been searching for her everywhere but I haven't been able to find her. Her phone is not the same, she moved and she doesn't work in the grocery store anymore. - he explained confused.- Is there any chance you might now where is she? - I do, actually.- he admitted and took a pause before delivering the bad news- She went back to Argentina. - What? -he questioned, shooked by the news. It was like an ice-cold shower - What happened? Did she lose her scholarship? Did something do something to her? - he asked worriedly. - No, she's fine, don't worry. She went back shortly after you left - the young lady informed him- She said she missed her family a lot and didn't want to stay any longer in the country. She didn't lose her scholarship, she gave it up.- Sy was speechless. He has lost her forever. He couldn't accept that just like that. He needed to see her again, somehow. - Do you have a phone number by any chance? - he asked her - No, sorry.- she apologized. After a little pause, she continued - I have her address, though. She sends me an email with her address and I sent her mine so she could send me things she wanted me to try from her country and I'll send her things that only could find here. -----------------------------------------------------------

He had learnt enough Spanish from two Latino soldiers on his squad to be able to handle short conversations. So, thankfully, it wasn't to difficult for Syverson to order a taxi at the Argentinian airport to go to Rebeca's house. He got out of the taxi and took a minute to see her house. It was quite beautiful, it had flowers in the front. There were bars in the front of the house, so he had to press the doorbell for someone to open the door for him. Moments later, a woman in her late forties or early fifties open the house door. - Hola, qué necesitabas? (Hello, what do you need?)* - asked the woman - Hola. ¿Está Rebeca? (Hello. Is Rebeca here?) - questioned Sy, struggling to hide the fact that he wasn't a Spanish speaker. - Decime tu nombre, así le aviso que la estás buscando (Tell me your name so I tell her you are looking for her) - Digale que Sy la busca, por favor. (Tell her Sy is looking for her, please) - he replied. The woman clearly heard about him, because she looked surprised at looked at him from head to toes, like inspected him. - Espera acá un minuto, ya vuelvo (I'll be back in a minute, wait here) - said the woman and entered the house, closing the door behind her. While waiting, he took a look around the place. Pedestrians were walking around, looking at him, just like some old ladies who were sitting in the porch of the house chatting. For a moment, he felt like a zoo animal. Around ten minutes later, the door opened again and Beca appeared, closing the door behind her and walking towards him. She opened the bars door and let him in. They looked at each other in silence for a moment and then hugged, like if neither of them could believe that was happening. After the hug, he pressed his head against her forehead and smile. He missed her so much. He looked at her and couldn't even believe it. She was way more beautiful than he remembered. - Why did you leave? - he asked her - It's a long story. -she replied. - I thought I lost you forever.- he replied, sighing in relief to know that he was finally with her again. - I ... Why are you here Sy? Why are you in Argentina? - I came to you. I want you to come back with me. - he begged her. - I can't. I lost my visa when I gave up my scholarship. - she explained - You can get it back or maybe a work visa - he suggested - It's not that easy, Sy. You know it. - I'm not giving up. I'm going to find a way to bring you back. Please, take me back. - I would, but I don't think I can get back there. Things are way more complicated than you think. - she paused and took a deep breath. Then, she looked into his eyes and asked him to follow her. They entered the house. Rebeca asked him to wait in the living room as she went into another room. While waiting, Syverson inspected the place. It was a homie. It wasn't different from his house or any other American house, but it felt different. The smell of homemade food being cooked; there was a certain cosiness and warmness that it was hard to explain. No wonder she wanted to go back there instead of staying in the coldness of the solitary house she used to live in Washington. He heard a room door open and he settled his eyes in the direction in which Beca disappeared. He froze as he saw her enter the living room with a little girl on her arms. She had the same eyes and curly brown hair that Rebeca, but her face...her face looked like him. It was like looking at the pictures that his mother had of him as a little kid, but with long curly hair. Rebeca sat in a chair next to a table, while looked at the little girl, who was shyly hiding her face on her chest, grabbing some of her curls. Sy kneeled before them, without taking his eyes out of the little girl, speechless. He tried to stroke the girls' hair but she hid even more. Beca caressed her and told her that it was ok. - He's daddy. Do you remember daddy? I showed you pictures of him and talked to you about him? He's here. - she explained the little girl. - Does she speak English? - asked Sy, without even thinking. He still was in shock. - Yes. I decided to teach her both English and Spanish at the same time. She's still learning, but she understands when you speak to her in both languages.- she explained. - Hi, baby. I'm your daddy.- he replied, with tears in his eyes. He couldn't believe he had a daughter. - Why... -he began, looking at Beca. He didn't have to finish his question because she knew exactly what he was going to ask. - I was going to tell you that day, but then I couldn't. For lots of reasons. I think you might understand why I did it. - I do. - he agreed. She didn't need to explain anything. Whatever happened, happened. He knew that somehow Beca made the right call. It wouldn't have been the same those years if he would have known that she was alone taking care of his child, but he couldn't leave his squad alone either. He felt terrible for losing a year of his daughter's life; for not being there the day she was born, her firsts steps, her first word. Nonetheless, he would be for the rest of her important moments. And no matter how hard I'd be, he would find a way to take his woman and his daughter back with him.

-----------------------------------------------------------

- Mommy, mommy, look what daddy bought me! - said Alma running into her mother's arms to show her the new toy she's got. It was a plastic gun. - See? Now I'm a warrior like daddy. - the little 5 years old girl told her mother while pretending to shoot with the gun. - Seriously, Syverson, a gun? - Rebeca reprimanded her husband for the toy he gave to their daughter. - Hey, she chose it herself, ok? - he defended himself, grabbing her wife by her hips and kissing her. - A kiss is not going to get you out of trouble, mister. Tell me, do you think a gun is an appropriate toy for a little girl? - Girls can be awesome soldiers too, ma'am. - he pointed out - I'm not saying that's not an appropriate toy because she's a girl, I'm saying that toy isn't appropriate for a child of any gender. - Apologies, my lady, you're right. But, you know her, she'll leave it on the floor and forget about it in two days, as she does with all of her toys. - he said grinning. - You're lucky you're right, sir, otherwise there was not going to be more kisses for you. - And that would be the end of me. - he finished the conversation, kissing her while he stroked her face.

The end.

Notes: *In Argentina, is a polite way to ask people you don't know who they are and why are they calling at the door.

#cap sy #captain syverson #captain syverson fanfic #captain syverson fanfiction #henry cavill #demivampirew

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counterror · 4 years

Text

* ANSWERED ASK / GHOST META.

DO NOT REBLOG.

RANDOM DEVELOPMENT ASKS / ALWAYS ACCEPTING.

anonymous asked : are there any differences between how simon acts towards children and how ghost acts towards them ? in a situation where a child could be a threat, how does he deal ? in the other meta you said he could potentially become more feral and frantic when presented with a vulnerable kid, is this because of an innate desire to keep them safe or for other reasons ? what's his view on those who harm children and if he witnessed something like that, what sort of reaction would he have ? love your metas btw !

I believe there are differences. in a situation where ghost is confronted with a child as a hostage, it’d be simon that bleeds through. if you think about it, despite simon practically shutting himself off and engaging ghost once the mask is on, ghost isn’t a separate entity that’s jumped into his body. he’s a persona. meaning, despite his complete lack of empathy and hard shell, simon is witnessing everything taking place. he’s merely channeling certain aspects of himself to get the job done.

take the concept of a method actor, an actor who remains in their role right up until the job is finished, if they’re playing an extremely apathetic character and the routine of that character is to kill the bad guy. mind you, the actor themselves are empathetic. so you’ve got this caring, empathetic actor playing the role of someone that’s the complete opposite. and it’s all going fine, routine is routine, you’re used to it - until there’s the cold hard reality of a child stood in front of them with their life on the line. imagine that one thing that draws every ounce of empathy out of you and put it in the place of that child. do you really think simon, the actor in this circumstance, would shun that entire situation purely to remain in character ? if they really want to, they might confront the event as the character - while responding to the actor’s empathy rather than ignoring it entirely, if that makes sense ?

so you’ve got ghost, who’s apathetic, logical, focused and objective being driven by simon riley, who’s capable of being all of those things but completely lacks the composure to act confidently and intelligently on them. which works fine, until ghost is faced with a situation that can draw aspects of simon out that are meant to be boxed away until later. but then without ghost present, simon on his own would behave in an entirely different way. which would risk getting him and the child killed, because the urge to react would outweigh the certainty of being logical and careful. but because simon would also bleed through ghost in that moment, even with the mask on, it’d prompt ghost’s response to be less calm and analytical than it would be when faced with an adult - since simon wouldn’t be bleeding through under that circumstance.

however, high stress interactions differ massively from general ones, so if ghost was faced with a child in a calm environment - say he randomly crossed paths with one while deployed, it wouldn’t trigger any reaction from simon. he’d move on and have little interaction. he’s there to get the job done. whereas were simon to cross paths with a child, he’d be more observational of the child’s surroundings, scanning what their parents are like or if they’re in any danger. this changes for ghost when high intensity comes into play - when lives are on the line. he would ignore the child, up until that child called for help or was visibly in danger, in which case a response would surge from simon - likely kicking ghost into reacting in a more urgent and frantic way. it’s important to note that ghost is, mostly, a manifestation of simon’s grief and anger that is stored away, which he learnt to utilize in a useful way. emotions that would typically eat away at you and push you to act out within society are caged away and then brought out in full force when faced with hostile environments - he’s able to turn that aggression and violence on and off with the mask. but the lack of control in a situation can cause it to be used inappropriately or clumsily, because simon’s lack of composure bleeds through and is liable to cause ghost to make mistakes. so behaviour and reactions definitely vary depending on circumstance.

things differ with a child who’s perceived as a threat. it’s similar to how a soldier may love dogs, may even own one, but if an enemy’s dog is charging at them with the sole intention to rip out their throat or one of their teammate’s, they have to act without holding up the mission or giving away their presence. I do believe when an enemy is involved ghost will aggressively and actively block simon out in order to proceed. he’s experienced enough to know that an enemy with a weapon has the potential to compromise the mission, kill him and one if not all of his men. there is a big difference between an innocent civilian in danger and an enemy that is bringing the danger. this is where ghost’s objective thinking comes into play, child or not, this enemy has a weapon and intends to use it on me. morals and ethics go out the window, albeit with an extremely subtle struggle in comparison to eliminating an older enemy. whether he wants to or not doesn’t come into it, and the same can be said in a situation where a pregnant woman with an explosive vest on is approaching him or his team. he’s trained to see, before anything else, an enemy who intends to harm innocents. whereas an innocent child being taken hostage by an enemy presents a completely different variety of consequences and possibilities.

that’s not to say eliminating a child enemy who’s considered a threat wouldn’t play back on his mind later once the mask is off. but the reality is that, leaving that child alive could’ve meant high causality numbers of the people he’s supposed to be protecting - that lapse in judgement could risk the deaths of many, all to protect that one. and ghost is trained to see that before anything else, meaning simon is too and therefore wouldn’t disruptively bleed through because he knows it has to be done.

the feral and frantic side I mentioned in that meta is a combination of simon bleeding through which prompts ghost to lose the control he has over the aggressive, hostile aspects of himself he projects - anger that’s triggered to be used inappropriately or impulsively rather than calculated or logically. ghost is a protective persona, his purpose is to act as a fortified wall around simon so the moment a direct threat to simon is perceived ( such as something that triggers his ptsd, like witnessing a child in danger, ) ghost’s aggression will spike in a way that isn’t progressive. ( this isn’t to be compared to the general threat that comes with his line of work, because that’s a different threat entirely. ) that’s simon bleeding through, his lack of composure pushing the control out of ghost’s hands.

it isn’t innate, but it is a desire to keep them safe. throughout much of his childhood, he didn’t feel this way. in fact, he wasn’t aware of his own trauma for much of his life, until he grew to his older teen years in which terms and labels became evident and he could see life for what it was. he eventually felt for kids in rough situations, and empathized with them, and his trauma / abuse throughout his childhood is the primary fuel of that desire. he had to become his own hero, effectively - there was no one there for him and therefore he had to become the man he needed at the time of his struggle. if he witnesses anything remotely similar to that which he experienced, or he sees a child who needs someone but doesn’t have them - he steps up and puts people in their place. he will speak up about it.

however, the final push came when his nephew was murdered alongside his family. a sweet, innocent child caught up in cold blood. clueless and terrified as two men, who were seen as friends, stormed the home and began gunning his entire family down. simon could never grieve for his loss. he could only focus on vengeance and justice for them and himself. but he regularly thought of his nephew’s suffering. wondered whether he died immediately, or whether he died slow, face down in pools of his blood - helpless and alone because his uncle riley wasn’t there to protect them. he couldn’t save himself, he couldn’t save his nephew, and certainly nobody on the outside at all tried to save either of them or even gave a single fuck about their tragedy. he doesn’t trust the law to step in, and he doesn’t trust anyone’s justice but his own. simon riley would risk any consequence in order to save an innocent, vulnerable child and it’s unlikely ghost would be able to do anything about it, other than offer a more composed, controlled, logical approach than simon alone would.

simon views those who harm children as weak and pathetic. there’s no other way to put that. he despises those who abuse their power and who take it on out the defenseless. it says in the comics that he joined the military after the events of the september 11 attacks. a position sought after in order to protect people from the tragedy and destruction many aim to produce. even at the start of his military career, he wanted to defend the defenseless. as aforementioned, simon would risk any consequence to save an innocent, vulnerable child. the most likely reaction you’d be looking at is him scaring the abuser / person doing the harm into never doing it again. he knows his father was fearless, didn’t care if he lived or died. which is where he, in the end, got to him, by leaving him to his cancer despite his father asking a favour of him. hanging in between life and death.

simon would know it’d be most sensible to involve the law and assist in pushing for justice, which is where taking ghost’s persona on would come in handy, enabling him to do what would be considered illegal in order to get a better outcome without waiting for the law to do very little. I won’t go into detail, but he’d certainly give much more than a stern word, that’s for sure. why remove a child from their home environment and throw them around needlessly when you can remove a few of the abuser’s teeth or fingers and ensure that child receives nothing but the best from that point on. if you see what I’m saying.

#THANK U SM FOR THE ASK !!#i felt this one in my BONES #abuse m #trauma m #ptsd m #child death m #i heavily appreciate that u like my metas bless u !!#metas. ( ghost. )#simon's vocal about that shit #whereas ghost is much more...#abuser wakes up late at night and ghost's sat at the end of their bed with a knife and torture tools type scenario :)#ghost certainly varies a fucking TONNE though and im #constantly developing him #ghost as a persona doesn't really... have a much of a reaction to ANYTHING #typically it'll be more bc simon's bleeding through #he would've achieved interrogating the butcher in the mw game #(where the butcher's kid and wife are involved)#bc ghost would've completely shut simon tf out #which is really simon shutting himself out bc he knows shit needs to be done #anonymous.#answered asks. ( ghost. )#headcanons. ( ghost. )#i have a lot to say i hAVE A LOT TO SA

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ayakashiramblings · 5 years

Text

Twilight: Breaking Dawn and Relationships

Once again... I am sorry Gaku.

Prologue

For the love of the gods, you had just wanted to bond. Sure, you could have stuck to food but one of your comrades was finally at the legal drinking age. You just HAD to celebrate that.

So you had turned to a rather sketchy magazine and everyone said they were down to do whatever the activity was on the first page.

Eventually, the page was burned. And you shall find out why.

To give them credit, they were good sports about it and even drew up a chart.

It was the Dawn Faction against the Twilight Faction, with each member of one of the factions having to compete with their counterparts in the other group.

The pairs arranged are listed before, couple with cute, loving annotations like ‘ogre-face’, ‘furry’ and ‘choker’.

Koga and Toichiro

Kuya and Shizuki

Ginnojo and Kuro

Aoi and Oji

Yura and Gaku

MC as the regulator

Chaos and Pain

Koga Kitamikado

Ah, the budding entrepreneur, making great strides in the scary new world thanks to his smart decisions.

A truly educated and learned person.

So of course, he wisely chose… to do a dare.

Mad man.

Even madder, he knew it was Toichiro’s turn.

He couldn’t help it, he liked things to be unpredictable. All kitsunes were masters of that.

Also, it was he who started this whole game.

“Ok, I dare you… to watch.”

“... To watch?”

“Yes. For five minutes specifically.”

“Watch MC make out with Kuya.”

Toichiro lost half of his tail with a swift swing of a sword and his fur was all ruffled from that blast of wind before MC could stop them.

So of course, MC had to do the smart thing.

“Fine, I will. Aoi, prepare.”

“WHAT?!”

Kuya was becoming unusually pale and at least now we know Koga is a red oni.

At least Koga’s exclamation was muffled as MC shoved a piece of paper to his face.

It was only when Koga became cross-eyed did he realize that it was one of Aoi’s pieces... specifically a chibi sketch of Kuya sleeping on a tree branch.

And MC was... aggressively kissing the paper.

The pressure of her lips still felt even through the paper on Koga’s face.

Damn, it could have been on fire.

The paper and his face.

Toichiro lets it go because everyone is getting uncomfortable with all the action happening and, OMG MC are you trying to slip in your tongue?

DID KOGA JUST TEAR THE PAPER WITH HIS TEETH?!

Aoi is sad that one of his hand-drawn chibis is now in bits and pieces.

At least it was only Kuya.

Kuya

To be fair, he thought he was safe because the one asking was Shizuki.

What he didn’t know was that not only was Shizuki ordered to, the snow spirit had imbibed in some alcohol.

“Kuya, I want you to write…”

“Why did you ask for the impossible?”

As Shizuki waved away the Satori Seer, Kuya was unusually the first to offer comfort. What was usual was the ‘wisdom’ it possessed,

“It's OK Aoi, I have a story. It's about an American treasurer who got lost in history until his wife who he cheated on…”

“Here is the catch. I want you to write… a lemon on your LEAST favourite ayakashi that you’ve recently met with your most favourite person here.”

“Hmm… so Kagemaru and MC.”

“What the hell, Kuya?”

‘L’ is for Loser Kagemaru.

‘E’ is for Every time MC beats him, I smile.

‘M’ is for Masochist because Kagemaru is weak for strong girls.

‘O’ is for when Other Onmyoji Boy drags away his contract.

‘N’ is for Not gonna lie, it was beautiful.

Unlike Toichiro though, Shizuki doesn’t want to give up without a fight.

So poor Kuya gets trapped in a snow blanket until the kitsune and the rest of the Twilight gang restrains the mad snow spirit.

Oh well, at least he can sleep.

After Koga finishes digging him out of there.

Ginnojo

By now, the wise grandpa had witnessed the dangers of taking on dares, unlike SOME people.

“I’ll take the truth.”

“Gin-Gin, this isn’t you pursuing truth and justice.”

“I know and frankly, with the way things are going, maybe not now. Corruption runs too deep.”

I mean... he’s not wrong. Kuro slightly pouts at having been seen through.

“Ok, now tell me what part of MC do you think you can touch without blushing?”

...

Nevermind, he would rather live a lie.

It’s just that Kuro, ever-the-summer-child is great at giving the purest thing in the world.

Puppy-dog eyes.

There is no way he can lie now so, ironically with his face practically beet-red, confesses,

“Her kimono. Specifically the sleeve.”

“Hehe, so that’s what you...”

“Specifically the third thread.”

“Weird flex but ok...”

“Specifically the third thread’s middle and it has to be the blue one.”

Again, the Twilight sect has to show mercy to their elderly citizens.

MC offers him her sleeve, even slightly pulling out the thread and now Ginnojo can smile, albeit bashfully.

Aoi

He stares at Oji like an office camera.

What was the lesser of two evils? Truth, and who knows what Oji might ask. Dare, and…well…he could only imagine what his employer’s mind could think, but at least he knew Oji wouldn't propose anything life-threatening.

Just utterly mortifying like that one time Oji had dropped him off at school...

“Hehe, don’t worry, I won’t ask you to do anything extreme.”

“I’d rather you ask anything extreme. Truth.”

For some reason, Oji smirked, as if that was the right choice for his plan and the wrong one for Aoi’s last shred of dignity.

“Ok, gimme a second...”

Everybody freaked out when Oji decided to let the eye in the middle of his forehead appear and bulge out.

“It’s my lie-detecting eye.”

Yes, everyone. He has one. Not that he thinks his own son would lie.

Aoi is tempted to punch it away but he couldn’t let the rest of his comrades down after all they’ve done.

“Is there something you've seen in a steamy movie that you'd like to try?”

Great, and now it would look bad if he couldn’t name any or chose the wrong one to highlight.

So like the pure baby virgin that he is, announces,

“The ribbons.”

MC tries giving him her hair ribbon but he smacks it away with the brightest blush she has ever seen on his face.

Smacks the eye as well that just turns green to show that he is telling the truth.

Yura

“My wise brother will never do such foolish acts like choosing...”

“I pick truth!”

... Gaku is tired. He already knows how kinky his brother is.

Don’t ask me how he knows.

Anyways, Gaku has to think for a moment. He doesn’t want to put his brother in a bad light but he still has to keep the risque nature of the game.

So, he finally settles for asking, “Ever put something weird in your body?”

There, the most ambiguous question that ANYONE could take an innocent perspective on...

“Why, I once indulge in cream whipped to fluffy peaks with Sir Kuya. We poured it over our chests...”

Kuya tries to protest in his frozen chamber but it’s too late.

“And made-believed that we were Oji’s pecs he thinks he can expose but truthfully fails.”

Now, to Yura’s horror, Kuya is further pressed against the floor and Koga is still struggling to dig him out.

Interlude

“We’re killing them.” announced the Dawn faction.

MC has officially died and wonders about calling Akiyasu up just so that her Ayakashi would fight together against him instead of each other.

Even Kagemaru somehow offers her his commiserations as Yuzuru the beautiful geisha who had only arrived to deliver some beer.

Stumbles into this mess and stumbles out.

And now, it’s time for the Twilight gang.

Toichiro Yuri

Sweet revenge for Koga.

“I want you to kiss Shizuki DIRECTLY, LIPS TO LIPS.”

At first, he was fine. It was just making out. Sure, he might vomit into his valet’s mouth but at least that could be cleaned up.

Plus, at least Shizuki should be a good kisser with all the ladies he has charmed into his life.

... Until Toichiro had realized.

“Why... is the rest of the kitsune clan here?”

Many small foxes were loping in their direction, some already in their more humanoid form. All had one goal.

“GREETINGS MASTER TOICHIRO!”

“Sir Koga said that there was a huge bash with inari sushi!”

As Koga tosses a few fried tofu pieces at the rabid crowd, Toichiro’s eyes turned briefly feral.

“... I hate you. When this is over, I’ll- mmph!”

Shizuki decides to land a big wet one on him.

Today was the day Toichiro learnt that no, Shizuki was a bad kisser. drunk at least.

There was an unexpected twist when one of the clan members cried with joy.

“FINALLY! MY SHIP HAS SET SAIL!”

Shizuki

Can we just marvel at the fact he is actually playing though for just a second?

We all know the other stoic man Ginnojo is actually curious about new games.

But to get Shizuki to play instead of just serving some drinks and cordials?

That is no ordinary accomplishment.

And all we have to thank for this marvellous sight is... alcohol.

Oji-san, why?

“Tell us how you orgasm.”

Kuya, why?

Except... Shizuki doesn’t bat an eyelid. In fact, he even throws a wolfish grin in.

“Only before my girl because she is too good.”

“But I make sure hers comes harder.”

“And she will scream.”

...

Kuya lost and just burrows himself into the snow hole Koga had spent hours digging.

Oji

At this point, Aoi is becoming like the past self you had only seen once.

An absolute discipline master.

Oji thinks he can get away because Aoi is way too shy to ask him to do anything THAT scandalous.

For some with 100 eyes, the old man sure is blind.

With a smirk and almost evil, ominous tendrils of his bad aura flooding the room, he asks Oji,

“Well, I think you must have been a verrry bad boy in school.”

For the next round, Aoi makes Oji have a time out on someone’s lap.

Specifically Shizuki.

“You are so grounded after this.”

“Don’t you mean, time out, Mister?”

Aoi has no regrets.... especially since he managed to sketch it, caricature style.

Kuro

“I’m going to go with truth because I have a feeling the dare is the opposite of touching ironically.”

Wise choice, Kuro.

The problem is... he’s forgetting that Ginnojo was a soldier.

For a major force in the Edo period.

And he has seen Aoi grilling everyone while at the Milk Hall.

If he doesn’t know what questions will break a person, I don’t know what to say.

“So... Kuro, does your Ayakashi species know how to lap dance? If not, what are their attractive features?”

“Oh, Gin-Gin. Why did you go to the dark side?”

“Because you hate the dark. Also, I took out something from the military.”

He darted out of the room, returning with a fairly large device.

Ginnojo set it up directly in front of Kuro, tapping a microphone positioned in front of him. Several lights on the device blinked, and a paper readout steadily fed out a long sheet of steady wavy lines.

“This is a lie detector, the less freaky version. I’ve got Gaku making one based on your heart rate.”

Ok, I don’t think the lie detector was invented by then but let’s go along with it, ok?

“Erm... not really. I guess... we hug a lot?”

The lie detector machine broke. Now nobody knows.

Until 1921.

Gaku

Dare because there is obviously something he can FINALLY do for his brother.

Picking truth would have been anti-climatic because the twins know each other too well.

“I want a customized sex toy that vibrates.”

Specifically to the theme song of the game.

Gaku decides at that very moment to never let Yura near his notes ever again.

Because now he has to refer to his original blueprints... except he doesn’t actually have a notebook on this.

FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.

Actually has to sketch it out.

He refuses to look at the anatomical books he has even though there is literally a shelf dedicated for them.

So... yes, he’s drawing based on what he’s seen.

“So, are you basing it off yours because it’s awfully average...”

“OF COURSE A DICK LIKE YOU WOULD KNOW!”

Epilogue

Aoi has decided he is going to stay away from alcohol.

MC didn’t even moderate the game. She just watched the chaos unfold. And the article burn.

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timcbombs · 5 years

Text

✕ — wasn’t that tabitha smith wandering the streets of new york, 1973? civilians know them as boom-boom and see them as a hero. as far as i know, the twenty-four year old stands with x-force, x-factor, & new mutants, and are rumoured to be pretty self-assured & recalcitrant. ( liz gillies / transfemale / she/her )

{ trigger warnings : emotional, physical, and sexual assault, alcohol, homophobia, transphobia }

hey guys, sophia’s at it again lmao!! here’s more about my second baby aka my trash!baby under the cut

PT. 1: INTRODUCTORY INFORMATION //

tabby doesnt really have any appearances outside of the mceu except for a handful of cartoon appearances

so this rendition of her is gonna be entirely comic based

PT. 2: FROM TIME-BOMB TO BOOMER TO MELTDOWN TO BOOM-BOOM //

okay so. tabby was an only child, raised in a trailer park in roanoke. her mom was never really in the picture and her dad was an abusive alcoholic nut job. tabby never got an actual education. she was emotionally neglected & abused, as well as physically abused for her entire childhood.

the abuse only got worse when tabby’s mutation (and gender & sexuality, see below) came into question. her father beat tabby so hard that she ran away at around 13-14.

she started a long ass journey trying to figure out how the fuck to live in a world where she couldn’t really read & understand, but somehow make it to xaviers school for the gifted (someone in the trailer park had mentioned it to her and she decided it’d become her salvation)

a train she was taking en route to washington dc was attacked by the beyonder. the beyonder ended up considering tabby its only friend and felt bad for this young, frightened, abused girl and brought her to xavier’s. however because the beyonder is a powerful cosmic entity the x-men attacked it on spot and tabby, frightened and bewildered, left with the beyonder back to its home planet. she stayed there with him for a little while before realizing it was an evil entity hellbent on the destruction of worlds, and demanded she be returned to the xmen. she led the beyonder into an ambush and the beyonder, heartbroken about the loss of its only friend, willingly surrendered

that was tabby’s introduction to the x-men. because of how it all went down, she left the x-men for a little while and moved to LA. she joined a gang called the fallen angels where she learnt how to steal (amongst other things). she began to be sexually harassed and was sexually taken advantage of during her time with this gang, particularly by the gang’s male mutant leader, who’d enlisted her, and so she told the x-factor about the gangs presence

tabitha then witnessed the children of the x-factor being kidnapped by soldiers of The Right and stowed away on the ship to save them — where she befriended Rictor

the ship crashed when apocalypse was defeated and she lived on apocalypse’s ship for a while

when the x-men found her, tabby was forced to attend phillips academy in new hamsphire, where she was bullied by the other kids for being a mutant. she allied with the other mutants at the school and formed a group called the x-terminators, where she got hella involved with a bunch of demon & limbo & illyana bullshit when some of the mutants were kidanpped and being used as a portal into limbo

even though tabby had helped save the world, her school expelled her for being involved in the entire ordeal, and she then joined the new mutants, accidentally summoned a giant sea monster (like an idiot) and went to live wth some dwarves on asgard

she then joined x-force and changed her alias to boomer

she joined an underground paramilitary group and was bombed by a vibranium bomb, but survived. my trash queen

she was then invited by Cable, as meltdown, to join his group Underground to investigate the new weapon x program

she then joined next wave, as boom-boom, where she learned she’s immune to mind control

she was then kidnapped by anti-mutant extremists and personally held hostage by the leper queen. the leper queen decided to take her wrath out towards the x-men on tabby and shot her in the head (consequently she was then saved by otherwise certain death by one laura kinney)

she then teams up w/ domino to infiltrate sword because fuck the government, i guess

she went to live on utopia and stayed after it was destroyed, before finally settling at the xavier school and becoming a full-fledged x-man.

PT. 3: TABBY’S PERSONALITY & RELATED HEADCANONS //

she’s literally a disaster gay. that’s about it. she’s a chaotic babe who loves to throw herself into stupid situations. she loves to party, get smashed, has a ton of super famous hollywood friends who invite her out to parties all the time. she gets shitfaced with them and gets in a lot of trouble with them

i also write tabby as transfemale. and i imagine that was also a big contributing factor to the strain between herself and her parents, as well as a motivating factor to joining the gang she did. she needed money for the transition and for hormones.

shes super dumb bookwise but very streetsmart. it’d be dumb to underestimate her because she perceives things in such a unique way and it always ends up int he benefit of the team

that said she can be a lazy shit sometimes, motivation is not her forte

shes got a ton of trauma she’s never willing to address ever (and more she never talks about from her party days)

shes the kind of girl though who’ll blast music at 4am — despite everyone else being asleep. she’s got absolutely no manners, and has a long history of playing pranks on the x-men (via literally bombing them with her powers) if they don’t listen to her/undermine her/ neglect her. basically. don’t get on her bad side.

she just wants to be that fun friend everyone can go to for a good time, she doesn’t like to drag people down with her own issues. anyways shes a chaotic bisexual with the mouth of a trucker who deserves the world & u can’t change my mind

— so thats about it for my trash baby!! shes been involved with a hella lot of teams and is always open for all the connections! pls luv her! <3

#73:intro #「 about. 」#﹠⋅ 。💣 ꜰᴀᴄᴇꜱᴘᴀᴄᴇ ᴘʀᴏꜰɪʟᴇ. ⋮「 ── well ‚ that didn’t work: an autobiography. 」

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gwynbleiddyn · 5 years

Text

an evening ritual;

Alexios definitely recalls being hounded by his trainer in the agoge for not looking after his arms and armour well enough. Too dirty. Never polished. Left lying around in any old spot of dirt when Alexios had given up on being a sensible Spartan son. It was a harsh truth for a lazy child to come to terms with, in all honesty, and it wasn’t exactly until Alexios had lost too much drachmae on Kephallonia that he’d decided taking care of his own gear would be slightly more profitable. At least, it would be, compared to having every crook from Sami to the cursed valley run off with drachmae and armour that was meant to be repaired, not stolen.

Over the years since then, Alexios had made it a ritual. At the end of a day, armour needs to be cleaned and inspected. Weapons need to be set aside carefully, but never too far. If his arms and armour are in fighting shape, then so is he - it’s always been that simple. That mantra had worked for a long time, when it was only himself he had to think about, and when camping meant lonely nights with a makeshift shelter and Ikaros to keep watch. Now, though, things are... different.

Not in a bad way, Alexios supposes, sparing a glance around the camp he finds himself in.

Spartan banners are flung over hastily erected palisades, wooden barriers set outside each open gate - all decorated with armour stripped from reckless Athenians who had wandered too close in the past few days. A grim reminder that war was there to greet them at every turn. In that respect, it’s been difficult to adjust. Alexios is used to keeping himself alive, marking targets down one by one as quick and quiet as he can. Now, he fights in formation when he’s asked to, holds up his shield-brothers with aching arms and bloodied fists, and bears the weight of too many dead Spartans when they fall in front of him.

It’s heavier when you know their names, Alexios finds.

But the good part of all this is that Alexios can finally say he belongs somewhere. A Spartan camp out in the field is now a safe harbour for a weary misthios-turned-soldier, and it feels good to have people who know your name as well as they know your deeds. For too long, Eagle-Bearer has plagued Alexios with a false sense of heroism - it’s become detachable, separate from himself and his thoughts - and in that alone, his own name has started to seem insignificant. As though it was never him who completed these tasks in the first place.

“Ai, Alexios!”

Looking up, he finds several pairs of eyes on him. Anywhere else, Alexios might have already had his spear at the ready, but here, he just looks at them all and puts a name to each face. Hesiodos, a small, sharp-faced man with a thin smile and ever-dark eyes, seems to be awaiting something. Like a response, perhaps, one that Alexios was meant to give.

“Hm?”

“Wine, Alexios! You would agree that a sweeter wine is far more palatable than those musty, dried-up excuses of ‘rich’ wines, yes?”

Alexios just blinks, brow furrowing as he tries to recall some memory of taste and smell. Wine isn’t exactly his speciality, he just drinks it if it’s there. Though, granted, he doesn’t like most of the stuff he does end up drinking - it does its job to get his thoughts pleasantly out of focus, however, and that makes up for the awful taste it leaves behind.

“Clearly, shitty wine has scoured the last of your tastebuds, Hesiodos.” Alexios throws back with an impish smile, knowing this will spark up a fresh round of debate in a camp that’s already well on its way to rowdy inebriation, despite some more stalwart polemarchs lurking in the command tents. Hesiodos crows his dissent, almost falling off his seat - wine goblet still full, of course - and tries to find another, more agreeable voice to add to his debate. Lykos is standing behind him, mostly to keep him sitting upright at this point. A giant brute of a man, he towers over most, but has the personality of a field mouse. Alexios meets Lykos’ exasperated gaze with a smug grin, knowing full well that the man won’t dare say a word against Hesiodos’ drunken ramblings, and that he’ll stay standing there until morning comes if nobody takes pity on him and takes Hesiodos out of his hands. A small amusement, but it goes a long way.

That is the other good thing. The belonging lends itself easily to camaraderie, particularly when you know your life is in the hands of the men around you. Alexios enjoys that far more than he ever did the lonely nights on Mount Ainos, and even if it comes with the constant ribbing and jibes of friendship, it’s not something Alexios is willing to give up now that he’s found it. In a way, it makes him a better soldier; having a cause that doesn’t just belong to you alone gives you far less room for mistakes.

With the attention now off him, Alexios turns his mind back to what got him thinking in the first place. His armour sits by his tent, waiting for him to clean and inspect it, like he usually always does - but not tonight. He can see it needs maintaining - blood is caked into the engravings, there’s more than a few scrapes he could polish out, and he needs to restring the breastplate after an arrow snagged the ties over a week ago.

It’s been over a week since Alexios picked that armour up, not to put it on, but to clean and look after it. Over a week since that blacksmith had handed it to him without a word and turned to making the next set, for the next soldier that would inevitably come along.

He’d gotten away with a week of traveling and fewer rest stops than usual - enough to account for how much wear his armour is showing already - but now that they’ve set their spears down in Boeotia once again, preparing themselves for another bloody dogfight with the Athenians, Alexios has run out of excuses.

That memory of the trainer keeps coming back to him every time he even thinks about getting it over with.

It’s stupid, and childish, and all kinds of irrational, but Alexios can’t escape that strange feeling of unworthiness.

“I don’t think staring will make your armour any cleaner.”

Another voice to distract him. Alexios recognizes it instantly this time, however. Thaletas brushes a fleeting hand across the back of Alexios’ neck as he passes, eyeing the armour that Alexios has basically been glaring at for an unreasonable amount of time.

“I can dream.” Alexios retorts drily, resting his elbows on his knees as his hands drop, fingers tangling and untangling. Thaletas notices, frowning as he catches sight of Alexios, walking past. Alexios just shakes his head, and goes back to staring at his hands instead.

Moments later, Thaletas is back and sitting at his side, working away on his own armour. Alexios is almost offended, but when he looks up, he finds that his armour is definitely not where it was mere moments ago. His gaze slides down and to the left, finding his own set lined up next to Thaletas’.

Oh.

Something pulls strangely at his chest, seizing his breath for a moment. Alexios is about to say something, but the words are gone before they even reach his lips, and Thaletas is talking again.

“I hated doing this as a child.” He says idly, setting aside a completed pair of greaves. Alexios just watches intently, the care and attention that Thaletas puts into such a menial task is almost endearing.

After a beat of silence, Thaletas continues, sparing a brief glance sideways to Alexios. “But your armour is one thing protecting you and the rest of your line. It gets beaten into you, one way or another.”

Nodding, Alexios exhales sharply. He knows that. That’s not the problem. It’s the armour itself - Spartan, made for him, made for an army. Made for a stubborn child in the agoge, long ago.

“I drove my trainer mad.” Alexios states simply, as a glimmer of a smile tries to force its way through. “I was stubborn. Headstrong. Never wanted to listen, or take the time to care about things I thought were beneath me.”

Thaletas doesn’t stop his work, but he’s listening. Alexios can tell, watching the way Thaletas slows down when Alexios reveals something more about a past that too few people know.

“Learnt my lesson on Kephallonia. But...” Alexios scratches at his forearm nervously, shaking his head, “It was something I should have learnt in Sparta. And this--” he gestures to the pile of armour, “Just reminds me of that trainer, and of how much else he would have taught me if I’d never left.”

Thaletas slowly comes to a stop, resting Alexios’ half-cleaned breastplate against his knee for a moment. He doesn’t look at Alexios at first - his gaze drifts around the camp at the soldiers he sees dotted around, all in various states of sobriety by now. Alexios looks up and follows his gaze, curious, but he finds nothing of interest and winds up shooting Thaletas a quizzical glance instead.

“I think it might be the other way around, Alexios.” Thaletas tells him quietly, finally meeting his gaze. “How much would you have never learned?”

Alexios hasn’t thought of it like that before.

“Trust me. You wouldn’t be here if these men didn’t want you here. There’s a reason they’ve been asking for you to join them on the field all this time.” Thaletas sounds certain, and Alexios finds himself wanting to believe him.

“I can fight, that’s all they need.” Alexios’ doubts always drive him to argue, even with Thaletas all but staring him down.

“By the gods...” Thaletas lets out a half-laugh, half-sigh, rubbing at his forehead for a moment, “You are stubborn. That hasn’t changed. But what I’m trying to say is that you inspire. You give the men hope-- you give me hope.”

Alexios manages a smile at that, and an overwhelming sense of relief washes over him. His shoulders relax, and he finally untangles his fingers, rubbing his hands tiredly over his face as if to brush off the show of self-doubt he’d shared. Thaletas makes it unbelievably easy, even in such a place as this where privacy is long out of reach, Thaletas makes it quiet and bearable when Alexios needs that space.

A useful skill to have if you want to keep a misthios around, it seems.

“Let me help.” Alexios reaches over and picks up his own breastplate from where it’s been resting against Thaletas’ knee, “At the very least, if I do a terrible job, you can cover it up.” he says to Thaletas with a grin, nudging him with his leg as he sits back.

“There’s a lot of things I’d do for you, but cleaning your armour regularly is not one of those things.” Thaletas chuckles quietly, and gets back to work on his own armour, letting Alexios lean against him slightly while they drift into companionable silence.

#i wanted to write a drabble not 2k words ://///////#thalexios #alexios #thaletas #c: alexios #c: thaletas #x: sparta has my heart #tag: nyarmamaitar

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snkpolls · 5 years

Text

SnK Chapter 111 Poll Results

RATE THE CHAPTER 1,677 Responses

While still a highly rated chapter, satisfaction was down slightly over last month (4.33 for 111; 4.49 for 110). Many people expressed surprise that Isayama was able to pull off such an emotional chapter despite the predictable setup. Now that the Braus dinner has reached its conclusion, most are eager to get back to the main cast.

I loved the mood whiplash Isayama was doing. A happy moment already ruined by a tragic one that escalated higher. The main course was supposed to be delicious, but everything the Blouses and the SC tasted was treason and deception. Pure evil.

Glad to see further development for the characters of Falco & Gabi as well as the beginnings of preparation for war against Marley. (Albeit very slight) Hopefully in the next chapter we will get to see what the warriors & Marley have been up to while this revolution has been happening.

Good chapter, nice way to start a volume

I get why this chapter needed to happen, but I feel there were ways to advance these plot threads without killing the momentum we had last chapter.

I'm glad the Blouses are teaching Gabi that war is bad. Now let's get back to the damn war! Also, is Historia ok?! She wasn't looking good last we saw her, and now the Yaegerists are targeting her, and I'm worried.

not enough floch and no funeral/memorial for zackly and shitmachine, disappointed :'( good chapter though

I would like to file a petition for Isayama to stop repeatedly stabbing the already open wound he caused in to my chest pls?

WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE PART OF THE CHAPTER? 1,678 Responses

With so many options it was difficult to choose but “Wine Mystery Revealed” edged out “All of the Above” with almost 20% of respondents. “Mr. Braus’ speech” and “Mikasa, savior of children” also had strong showings.

I honestly wanted to choose more than one which was Mikasa protecting Gabi, Mr Braus's speech and Gabi asking if they didn't hate her but I can't pick more because of the question type so ;-;

Favorite moment? Nicolo christening the Falbi ship. Yeah.

Mikasa saving Gabi was an incredible scene!

The way Nicolo insulted Jean to protect him was so cute, but if I were Jean I'd feel offended too lol.

Jean's new hair is awesome :D

OMG MIKASA IS PERFECT. MARRY ME!

Sasha eating pizza was sooo cute and i don't know if my heart can take it anymore because all this cuteness turns into angst because of what happened to her :(

PAPA BRAUS, BEST DAD IN SNK, OR BEST DAD OF ALL TIME? 1,673 Responses

On a scale of 1 out of 10, Mr. Braus scores an 8.6. Although we haven’t asked you guys to rate other dads in the SnK universe, we’re confident he takes the number one spot of best father, and probably best parent as well.

Mr. Braus is the best parent in this entire universe (not that the bar was set very high, but still). I nearly cried during his speech.

Mr Braus showing this act of compassion - an act of letting go of revenge to stop the cycle of hatred and oppression is probably the most valuable experience Gabi could've learnt from (more valuable than any words spoken to her).

Step aside Eren, papa and mama Braus are the real Humanity's Last Hope! Their kindness and empathy are the only things that can stop the cycle of violence that this series is depicting on the most intimate and personal level. My appreciation for Sasha as well has grown exponentially through Nicolo, Kaya and the Braus parents.

Mr. Braus is like the only person in all that fucked up world that actually understands the root of the problem. Keeping people "into the forest" in a perpetual fight for survival between "preys and predators". I do believe that his words are everything we need to understand the moral of the story and may be hinting to what Eren and Zeke are trying to achieve (though from extremely different mindsets).

Sasha's dad's speech is so touching. Almost gave me hope that the series will end in a good way--people will find a way to deal with this unforgiving forest that is our world.

With all the allusions to World War II and the Holocaust, Mr. Braus' speech might have been the single most realistic depiction of the entire series. There are echoes of Oskar Schindler here. This is the same compassion that some Germans showed when hiding Jews in their basements, barns, etc. and saved lives. I was absolutely floored by this chapter, especially because my grandparents were Holocaust survivors themselves.

AFTER SEEING GABI'S EMOTIONAL RESPONSE TO THE BRAUS FAMILY'S GRIEF, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT HER? 1,668 Responses

Believe it or not, but compared to previous polls it seems more and more people are warming up to Gabi (or at least don’t hate her as much as they used to). 46.4% are glad she finally got some character development. Nearly 30% of the fandom are starting to like her or have always loved her. However, 17.9% of all respondents would rather not deal with Gabi at all.

Between warming up and loving her

Always loved her. Just keep loving her more and more. It was NEVER her fault.

Doesn’t put me up nor down

Feed her to titan falco

Finally some character development, but I still don't like her. She just grates on my nerves.

Gabi's scenes this chapter gives me hope for the story's message. Gabi's heartfelt question juxtaposed with Kaya's instant reversal was the most powerful scene in the recent chapters.

Great character development, but sorry she'll remain the one whom I hated.

I can't decide I just need a bit more time

I have always felt the hatred towards Gabi was unjustified so i'm glad that people are starting to like her character more

In that "Do you really not hate me?" there is everything Gabi is and represents as a character. Can't wait to see how she will further develop now.

This shows that regardless of the environment she has been raised in, Gabi is still just a confused child and a human being with feelings. I approve.

My hopes for her are very very low, but it's nice finally seeing a human and not radical, violent, aggressive reaction for once. hopefully she'll start seeing walldians as repressed ppl like the ghetto dudes

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE TERM “YEAGERIST”? 1,676 Responses

The fan translation gave us “The Jaeger Faction” which over half of respondents preferred over Kodansha’s official translation of “Yeagerists.” 14% like the term, while 10% are not fans of it.

"Yeagerist" sounds like a name of some crazy group of fan girls. I prefer "Jaeger Faction" - sounds more serious.

I hope to become a member. better because it could mean both yeagers, not just eren

Could've come up with something better.

I like the name, and hereby identify as a Yeagerist.

The abs empire

It's more respectful than "Idiots" I guess

Silly as fuck and hilarious. Jaeger Faction is superior.

I chuckled. It’s fine.

I like the term! It sounds perfect for an extremist faction!

The name doesn't matter. It just had to be called a sect, so it's fine.

DO YOU THINK ANY OF THE SOLDIERS AWARE OF ZEKE’S AND/OR HISTORIA’S LOCATION COULD BE A “YEAGERIST?” 1,672 Responses

63% of respondents suspect that at least one of the 30+ soldiers aware of Zeke and/or Historia’s location are loyal to the Yeager brothers. 28% aren’t sure, and a small percentage are certain that these soldiers are all to be trusted.

LET’S TALK ABOUT COMMANDER PIXIS SURRENDERING TO EREN. WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING DO YOU MOST AGREE WITH? 1,672 Responses

Very few of us took Pixis’ word at face value. 47.3% believe he was at least partially putting on a show. 41.6% have no idea, but trust him regardless.

I don't know how this negotiation is going to work but I'm glad someone finally has some plan which doesn't involve fighting or doing nothing. I think he's a wise man and he knows what he's doing. I'm going he's in charge now.

Pixis is smart and has a strategy that aims to save lives. Momentary surrender is a necessary step to take back control of the situation as a whole. That's called leadership.

Loved it, he’s playing chess. Sacrificing his bishop for another move

Why has Pixis become my hero these past two chapters? He is smart and brave enough to not only recognise the military's mistakes, but also humble and determined enough to take corrective steps to bring the lost sheep back into the flock for the higher, long-term good. I love how there's one adult in the room who is above petty bickering and suspicion at a critical moment like this. Pixis is an Erwin-level class act and I'm so grateful we still have a character like that in the series ;--; (RIP Erwin)

He trusts Hange enough to let her lead the secret mission of screwing the Jaegers' plans, and he will do something important in the right moment. Of course, he can't say it directly because there are still traitors that want to put bombs here and there.

Pixis has no idea what he's doing, dawg, he just wants to get vored by a pretty lady and this is harshing his buzz

HE'S A YEAGERIST...

WHO MASTERMINDED THE SPIKED WINE PLOT? 1,657 Responses

At 71.8%, the overwhelming consensus is that Zeke masterminded the spiked wine. 9.4% gave Yelena the credit, and 8% attributed it to the Yaegerists.

Onyankopon seemed real suspicious with Nicolo this chap…

Zeke masterminded it, but he's too slippery to ever take responsibility for it. Yelena would probably go to the ends of the earth to claim it was her plan.

Both Jaegerists and Volunteers

Probably Gordon Ramsey, who's mad that his potential customer Sasha was ripped away from him.

I think it was Zeke's plan but Eren doesn't know about it, or the bomb. I think Zeke has more interests than meets the eye and will betray Eren.

DO YOU THINK EREN IS AWARE OF THE SPIKED WINE? 1,667 Responses

With a relatively close split, nearly 40% believe that Eren isn’t aware of the spiked wine. 32% don’t want to say either way, and 27% are certain he’s in on it.

I think Eren has been shown too evil to be true, i really think that in reality he has a plan that for some reason he couldn't share with his friends, and he is trying to save as many people as possible.

EXPLAIN WHAT EREN'S UP TO ALREADY

I never trusted Zeke for one second and I’m glad ta starting to pay off. I do still believe Eren isn’t really working with Zeke as closely as Military believes.He doesn’t want any of his loved ones to turn into Titans and I’m certain the hidden spinal fluid is Zeke’s intent because I believe nothing the disciples are doing is without his knowledge.

WHY DO YOU THINK THE WINE WAS SPIKED WITH ZEKE’S SPINAL FLUID? 1,648 Responses

58% of respondents believe that the wine is spiked as an insurance for Zeke in case Paradis turns on him. 18% believe it’s a way to hold leverage over Eren specifically, and 14% feel that the intent is to have pure titans available in case Paradis is attacked.

A way to easily get rid of pesky opposition

I’m not quite sure but none of these strike me as correct.

There are so many possibilities here: i mostly believe it’s some kind of insurance in case eren or paradis go against him, but there’s also the possibility that zeke was never actually on the eldian’s side in the first place

He will use it when he wants to eliminate Paradise if Eren refuses his true plan

Bargaining tool to gain control over everyone, like a threat/hostage

I'm hesitating between it being a conspiracy, and Zeke trying to do a coup d'état, by replacing all the higher up by people he somewhat trusts

I’m not so sure it’s just insurance... I think zeke might just be straight up planning on turning the higher ups into titans either way. I think he ultimately is not allied with Paradis and wants to be able to overthrow their military command structure at the drop of a hat.

It's Zeke's trump card and bargaining chip all rolled into one

Since they only used the wine on the military police members, it could be a protection toward Historia

I knew Zeke was going to stab them in the back, I was just wrong about how.

WHO DO YOU THINK DRANK THE SPIKED WINE? 1,655 Responses

36.3% believe the wine was limited to high ranking MPs. 63.7% of us worry that the wine has reached beyond that narrow scope.

A FUCKTON OF PEOPLE

Anyone in the high ranks of each branch, and possibly the entire MP (since their overall living environment is much fancier than the other two branches, they probably were also served by Marleyans)

I think just the MPs, but dear god I hope Nile didn't drink it. He was the only one from his training days' friends group that made it it out of the depressive cycle of violence and managed to have a family. He deserves better. Marie deserves better.

Wouldn't be surprised if Jean starts racing for the alcohol rack again after this chapter. Everyone is mentally and emotionally exhausted already and the storm hasn't even began. Time to get some wine fellas.

PLEASE NOT HANGE AND DOUBLE PLEASE NOT FALCO

WHAT IS YOUR THEORY REGARDING FALCO’S FUTURE? 1,654 Responses

Nearly ⅔ of all respondents think Reiner will pass on the Armored Titan to Falco. Another 11.5% think he will turn into a mindless titan, and not gain any shifter powers. The least popular choice was Porco or Pieck giving their powers to Falco. We also received quite a few write-ins:

He is going to die at the venerable age of 128 surrounded by friends and family

He will become the next Beast Titan

He won't transform at all and continue living the source of all pureness (fingers-crossed)

he will become flying titan

I love the fact that Falco in a way has already managed to fulfill his mission. He wanted to save Gabi from the horrors of becoming a Titan - and he just did that. By pushing her out of the way of the wine, he shortened his own lifespan, but managed to save her from dying a potentially early death.

He's going to have to save Gabi at least 2 or 3 more times.

It's going to be tragic and I'm very sad already!! He'll either end up as mindless titan killing people or he'll inherit Reiner's titan, meaning he'll be the one who kills him and inherit his memories. And of course his life will be shortened!! Either way I hate it!! He doesn't deserve any of that!!

SAVE BEST BOY

WHY DID NICOLO CONFESS AT THE END? 1,664 Responses

With a fairly even 3 way split, slightly more people felt that Nicolo confessed because of his friendship with the SL. Following that at 26.6% and 26.4%, Nicolo may have confessed because he was already caught red-handed, and that Mr. Braus’ speech moved him to come clean.

!All of the above!

He knew that it was almost time for Zeke’s plan to go in full swing, so he told them after it became too late.

Honestly, for me it's a toss. He was very emotional in this entire chapter, and he let it get the better of him. Why he confessed is beyond me. Maybe it has something to do with him wanting to seek vengeance against the Yeagers and Marley for both indirectly contributing to Sasha's death?

He felt guilty because Falco is innocent and he regrets that he took the hit and had wine in his mouth as a result (but he doesn't regret attacking Gabi)

It was probably quite a big burden of knowledge to carry. I imagine it was all those things at once.

He broke down under the enormous emotional pressure, as simple as that.

He participated in serving the spiked wine, maybe willingly at first. But at some point, maybe because of his relationship with sasha, he become uncomfortable and was compelled by the volunteers to continue against his will. After his arc, he know he's going to be arrested, and just confesses to unburden himself.

He felt guilty about using the spinal fluid on Falco at all - he was trying to use a normal wine bottle

HOW DO YOU VIEW NICOLO AND SASHA'S RELATIONSHIP? 1,666 Responses

Wow. Two thirds of the fandom believe Nicolo and Sasha were a couple. 23.3% believe it was a one-sided love affair, or as one comment put it, “Friendzone with food benefits. ”

I HOPE they were dating but the chapter made it to where there’s not really solid evidence that they were…

Nicolo loved Sasha in the conventional way. Sasha loved Nicolo the only way she could, alimentarily.

I'm a huge Springles shipper, so I'm kinda of sad about the whole thing with Nikolo, to be honest. Springles is really what helped me through a lot of dark times, so the fact that Nikolo and Sasha may have been dating really kind of hurts XD

The way Nicolo confessed his feelings toward Sasha in front of everyone especially Sasha's parents made me emotional.

I want to care about her “relationship” with Nikolo because I like the Romeo and Juliet setup but it also got zero development so.......how am I supposed to believe Nikolo was THAT upset about her when I never really saw them together in the first place?

If it turns out they really were together, I won't have a problem with it. But until Isayama confirms it in a more direct manner, I don't buy any notion of romantic relationship in Attack On Titan, especially with someone like Sasha, who seems to only be interested in food.

Sasha was a food-digger

SOME HAVE SUGGESTED THAT ONYANKOPON IS NOT TO BE TRUSTED AND WAS PERHAPS SENDING A MESSAGE TO NICOLO. WHAT DO YOU THINK? WHOSE SIDE IS ONYANKOPON ON? 1,653 Responses

Nearly half of us are in the dark about where Onyankopon’s loyalty stands, though 31% think that his allegiance lies with his own faction of volunteers.

¡Que lástima! As much as I like him I no longer trust him because of the wine reveal. Compared to everyone else, the look on his face makes me believe he knew exactly what was going on.

Eren, Zeke, Yelena, Floch... Literally everyone is a double agent. Can't we have a single person who is not a traitor?

He's not with Marley and not with Yelena, but does this mean we can 100% trust him i'm not sure

He's in relationship with Kiyomi. Not his fault Kiyomi's hot.

Liar liar paths on fire

I don't believe that he's totally innocent, totally 100% devoted to Paradis and Eldians. But I do believe that Yelena's acting separately from him.

I think Onyankopon probably knows more than he's letting on which is disappointing because I'd like at least one fucking person to not be shady as fuck. It's overkill.

If best boi onyankopon betrays hange I’m rioting

WILD CARD BITCHES!!

KIYOMI WAS PROMINENTLY FEATURED DURING THE WAR COUNCIL. WHAT BEST MATCHES YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT HER BEING THERE? 1,641 Responses

35.8% of responders think the military knows something is shady about Kiyomi and are trying to set her up, followed by 31.7% think the military made a mistake allowing her to hear their argument. Only 10.2% believe Kiyomi is actually being sincere about her plans and Mikasa.

Her motive is clearly not pure but I think she is (for now) on the right side. At the moment it's a game of maneuver between her, Mikasa, and Paradis.

She's aware of Zeke's spinal fluid plan, as it's extra insurance to insure her access to resources.

Paradisian incompetence continues on full display. To let an outsider in on the unfolding crisis situtation is amateur hour to say the least.

Kiyomi wants to screw everyone over for their money and resources and she's pressing the flesh aggressively

Kiyomi had something to do with Zackley's assassination...

Kiyomi is no threat to Paradis as long as their relationship benefits her and Azumabito. I can see she that if she perceives instability and civil war she will cut her losses and side with Marley / the world. Also Hizuru does not seem to condone what the Azumabito clan is doing. If the pressure is great enough from multiplicative forces, she will budge. I can also see her running back to Marley, figuratively and/or literally, and be basically disposed of as an example or due to sheer brutality. It's an archetype I feel Isayama would use - it's consistent with this arc's themes of political intrigue and moral ambiguity. Yams will definitely still make it his own in some way if this does happen though.

She's a shady Bitch and I wouldn't trust her with my car insurance let alone anything to do with this series.

WILD CARD BITCHES!!

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON NICOLO’S ATTACK ON GABI AND FALCO? 1,664 Responses

With ⅔ of all votes, most people could understand Nicolo’s anger, but do not condone his actions. A good chunk (28.2%) of people would have rather he’d hit Gabi with the wine bottle instead of Falco. A mere 3% want to see him swinging from a tree for what he did.

It was good but felt a bit forced. Kaya’s reaction was strange and Nicolo was genuinely unhinged. It’s alright to an extent as people tend to do absurd things in terrible situations.

Falco in his hero complex brought himself to trouble. I understand Nikolo.

Gabi is very bratty, stubborn, close minded and rude - she definitely doesn't deserve all love and protection. I was happy to see Nicolo kicking her ass.

I understood and I actually did not care if Gaby dies. I would be glad actually, It would be sad for Falco though.

I can maybe understand the bottle and punch but him treating a 12 year old like a sacrificial lamb was insanity.

It doesnt sit well with me at all tbh but i dont hate him

Nicolo comes from a place where it’s heavily socialised that Eldians are sub human. So while I disagree completely with him hurting children, I can see how he did it so easily.

Nicolo's actions were horrible, yet very human. It's clear he felt something towards Sasha, and he doesn't view Gabi or Falco as children in this scenario--he sees them as soldiers(or warriors), which is why he had no hesitation attacking a child.

HOW DID YOU FEEL ABOUT MIKASA’S DISPLAY OF COMPASSION? 1,661 Responses

Nearly half of respondents were just pleased to see Mikasa get attention on anything that doesn’t involve Eren. 28% were simply just excited. A few agreed it was a good show of Mikasa having room in her heart to spare and a few wished she wouldn’t have interfered.

A great example that she cares for others and hates to see death especially from children. She does not want to let them have the same future as herself.

Loving Mikasa in this arc, it really feels like she's matured in those 4 years.

Extremely important. She's stopping Kaya from "stepping into the forest".

Honestly the most powerful scene in the chapter, along with Papa Braus putting down the knife.

I don't know how to feel. She didn't have the right.

Considering none of Sasha's friends attacked Gabi or Falco on the airship and Mikasa's always been like this I don't see what the big deal is. It could've easily be anyone else imo but I guess it's nice she's getting to do something other than wanting to get to Eren asap. I just wish she was given more to do when I still cared about her. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I never really liked Mikasa, but I adored this scene. It shows a part of her that we don't often get to see so plainly in my opinion. She prevented a very bad situation from unfurling by being a bit more merciful, even if only for Kaya's sake.

Mikasa used to be one of my favorites. Not anymore. Not after this.

it's nice i decided to not take a drink each time mikasa shows concern for someone other than eren and ppl react by saying "finally! she shows concern for someone other than eren!" i'd be a chronic alcoholic by then.

We don't all have a Mikasa to craddle us in her strong arms so i hope Gabi appreciates this eventually. She seems shook already.

HAS THERE BEEN TOO MUCH ATTENTION ON SASHA’S DEATH? 1,657 Responses

Maybe it’s fate that this pie chart looks like a peace sign since fandom discussion on this topic is surprisingly civil. Very few people resent the attention Sasha has gotten. Only 11.9% are unhappy with it.

I appreciate how Sasha’s death this way is much more impactful than if she died how Isayama had originally planned.

I think there’s so much emphasis on Sasha’s death because 1. she made it so far with the group that they never thought they could lose her and 2. It’s peaceful enough on Paradis that they finally have time to mourn their dead (when before they had to figure out how to get back wall Maria and take out the titans).

I understand why people are frustrated that so much time has been spent on Sasha after her death, but I think there's a difference between spending time on her to mourn her death versus spending time on her death to advance the plot—revealing the wine scheme, yikes Falco+titan juice, Gabi's struggle with her indoctrination, discovering that even an integrated Marleyan like Nicolo isn't actually on Paradis's side. I think no other death in the series had as much potential to move the plot because because before now, the enemy was almost always a titan. A death at the hands of a human—moreover, a pseudo-protagonist and a child—in international warfare has a lot more to unpack in terms of what-happens-next than a death from a monstrous natural disaster.

WILL KODANSHA EVER RELEASE A CHAPTER WITHOUT TYPOS? 1,646 Responses

We were so close to having “No but in red” end with 66.6% of the votes earlier last week! Nonetheless, we are all in agreement that Kodansha’s translations will never improve. Not even for the tankobon.

ChildEREN Of The Sun... maybe Kodansha are sending us a message

WHAT ARE YOU MOST HOPING TO SEE NEXT CHAPTER? 1,665 Responses

With over 50% of the votes each, most of the fandom want so see the Yaegerbros reunite and catch a glimpse of the queen. In third place are the warriors (including their disguises, hopefully). Next on the list is a flashback to Eren’s time in Marley, while more Gabi and Falco ended in fifth place. Only 3 out of 10 people want to watch Monsterbowl.

Abs of anyone but Jeagers.

All of the above, and a pizza too, thanks.

What happened the to EMA conversation?

Historia's baby goes fetus deletus

Hange NOT turning into a titan.

This chapter has made me eager to see how Falco and Gabi would interact with the Warriors now that they are wiser. Also Zeke's plot has really thickened. Also, really appreciate the use of Sasha's death as more than just a GoT-esque stunt.

ANNIEEEEE

Eren and his horde. Zeke and Levi. The Warrior infiltration. Revelations on any other plots/schemes/conspiracies taking place on the island. Historia and her role in all of this. The arc is just beginning, but it's building up to something big. I can't wait for all this to finally blow up! Soon!

How widely the spiked wine was disseminated and drunk.

Floch, naked, in a stream with Eren, also naked, washing his back.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 1,600 Responses

Tumblr? Are you ok? We had more Facebook entries than yours.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE CHAPTER?

Attack on Titan universe is 100% worth living in now that we know it has pizza.

Best birthday gift my dream comes true so many feels EEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKK

Best boy Jean looked so hurt when Nikolo used a racial slur against him (to save him - you could tell Nikolo didn’t want to call him that) : (

Clean af. And it didn’t even touch the more exciting plot lines: Yeager bros, Annie, Warriors, Historia.

FALCO PLEASE BE OKAY MY BABY

Gabi's actions are revealed, Nicola's actions are revealed, Zeke's potential plans are revealed, Pixis' possible plan is revealed, the Volunteers' plans are slowly unravelling, now we just need to move onto Zeke, Eren, Levi, and Reiner.

Haven't enjoyed a chapter this much in months.

I think this is the first time in more than a year and a half that people are gonna understand what I've been saying about Gabi all along. If people don't change their opinions on her from this chapter they just have their hate blinders on.

Honestly I think it was pretty boring compared to the past like 10 chapters, but also because the bar has been set really high. I'm expecting each chapter to be amazing, when in reality, I should be looking at the overarching story. That's what's amazing.

I thought I would hate this chapter as much as the one where pregnant Historia was revealed but I hate it a little less because Gabi is getting the character arc she deserves. I'm super worried for Falco BBY tho. And Nicolo is a dick.

I thought it was really great in displaying the manga's most important message: Stopping the cycle of hatred. Mr. Braus had all the reason to direct his hatred towards Gabi, but realised the world is cruel. It's eat or be eaten, just like in the forest. Gabi was a victim of propaganda and was indoctrinated into her beliefs.

I was initially disappointed this chapter didn't stick/continue with the chaos of last chapter, but was surprised at how much I enjoyed it.

It was a great chapter! However, if it had at least one panel of Eren, it would have been even better. I cannot wait for more!

Last Christmas chapter was crazy, here's hoping the next one will be as well! As for this chapter, I enjoyed it as usual but was a little frustrated that we still didn't get more information about Historia. I mean, her last real apperance was back in July! I really hope we'll get to see her before the new year but I've got a feeling we may not. Also Annie. Please let 2019 be our lucky year, she's been gone long enough…

NicoSasha is so cute...!!! I'm glad to finally see the most anticipated scene. Mr. Braus's speech was really emotional. Never felt so much better after reading a chapter. But felt bad for Falco. He doesn't deserve this.

Not a huge fan of how melodramatic the nicolo part was (I understand why he snapped, but no mater how angry/upset he was would someone in that situation jump straight to murder? Really?) but overall I enjoyed the chapter. Now I’m just eager to see what happens when eren shows up to the zevi picnic!

oh Nic, the things you do for love. Sasha -saved- 2 people now, Kaya from the 2m titan and Nicole from the hatred the war caused. I really, really miss her

Really really emotional and fantastic chapter..... I'm sort of sad at the discourse that this has sparked in the fandom, but that's nothing new honestly. If anything, it's a sign of fantastic writing that everyone always has such strong opinions in any direction. At this point I would be concerned if a chapter DIDN'T spark such strong opinons and controversy. I am moved by the amount of human compasion showed in every single corner of every single faction, and shocked by how attached I am to every sect. I'm nervous for the future but ready to start seeing some outcomes.

The character development in this series is absolutely incredible. Its way beyond the simple gorey/edgy battle shonen reputation that it received way back from season 1. The themes, the characters, the plot, the attention to detail have evolved so much that this series truly is one of my favorites of all time. Its reached the complexity and "realness" of Monster for me. This was one of the best chapters to date, I loved it!!

Yeah, I loved Sasha but I'm salty she gets so much focus after her death considering she wasn't that important in the overall story. Meanwhile Erwin got nothing despite the fact 90% of the events of the story would have happened very differently or not at all if he hadn't been there (no Levi in the SC, Eren shipped off to the MP, no Uprising... etc.). I get she's the catalyst to Gabi's characater development but... wait, why does Gabi gets more screen time than most MCs in this story anyway? That's how many chapters with the main focus on her? Is she a MC now? Isayama changes MCs like he changes his undies I swear.

Nicolo was tempting the Braus family with a violent solution that promised quick satisfaction, while Kaya just lost her cool long enough to go with what had been offered to her on a silver platter. However, in return, the sight of the Braus parents and Kaya's raw sadness in the aftermath of the confrontation and what he almost made Kaya do returned Nicolo back to his own senses as well. They are all such wholesome characters despite the moments of weakness.

Gabi’s character arc seems very predictable, which is not a bad thing really, but i kinda want it to be done so that the story moved on to more interesting things and characters

I want to know what the warriors are doing. No one strong enough is watching over Annie right now so Pieck, Reiner and Porko might try to get her back in the next chapter.

I would have killed for just one panel of Historia or Eren.

Isayama handled the gabi-sasha-nicolo plot line well.

More questions , less answers ... every time Isayama does his thing.

#snk chapter 111 #snk 111 #snk polls #snk poll results

67 notes · View notes

iammarylastar · 6 years

Photo

2. Back to my feet.

I woke up the next morning, it seems I’ve been out around the clock. I’m alone in my room, sprawled in the middle of the mess I left, a solid headache knocking at my eyelids.

Mikomi, my rock, my lifeline left me. I deserved it. I hurt her. I frightened her.

The door unexpectedly opens on Sensei, Mikomi’s father and the leader of the village. His face is closed as fuck and he barks orders at me, which I don’t understand. He’s not Mikomi, her voice is always clear and soft, her Japanese simple and slowly uttered.

I do my best to quickly sit up, join my hands together and bow my head in respect. He looks clearly pissed off, I assume by my tantrum and I can’t have him mad at me or he would chop me in pieces with his katana.

Mikomi appears, padding in smoothly like she floats above the floor. She kneels down before me, her gaze at my feet, where she places a pile of clothes and a bowl of water. Before I can speak she disappears again, to be back instantly with what I assume be shaving items and a mirror.

I quickly grab her wrist and whisper her name but she keeps her eyes away from me.

“I owe you an apologize for what happened. I.. I don’t know, I’m still confused. I… Just lost my mind. I’m sorry.”

She gently pushes my hand back and says under her breath “I can’t talk to you now. Please clean up and shave. I’m sorry I can’t help you.”

The door slides shut, leaving me all by myself again.

I grab the mirror and study my reflection. Jesus I’m a waste, Sensei said something about a pig, yeah that’s me.

My hair has grown monstrous, no trace left of the clean military cut. Wild, disheveled curls twist on my scalp, traces of vomit coat my beard. I stink, like sweat and urine, I must have pissed myself while passing out.

The Japanese value cleanness as a mark of respect to the others and to yourself. I look more like a homeless, sick bear than a human, without Mikomi to care for me. I’m not Cup anymore. Gaijin fits better, I’m a stranger to my own self.

I take off the wasted hakama , those large black Japanese pants and start to clean myself up, taking stock of my body for the first time in months.

My leg looks great, light red and swollen at the foot -thanks to my little stunt I guess- , the scars are clean and neat, Mikomi has done an excellent work. As usual.

The skin of my chest look nice as well, I realize it doesn’t hurt anymore. I wash my body, face and hair, shave and cut them the best I can by myself, then clean the pants in the bowl. I gather the cut hair, clean up what’s left from my mess on the floor, tied the bamboo splinter back on my leg, tied up the new kimono and find a somewhat comfortable seated position and just wait.

I wait for what seems hours. Time for me to gather my thoughts and my strength, put myself together and stop being such a whiny bitch.

Holy shit, how lame of a soldier I’ve been, weak and crying like a baby, Angie would have laughed at me and kicked my ass.

“Stop braiding daisies, Softie. I’m waiting for you!”

Fuck you’re right honey. Let’s go, let’s do this. Let’s be a man again, let’s fight for what I lost. From now on, I promise I’ll fight to have you back, Angie, you and our baby. I’ve cleaned my mess. I’m ready.

As if he’s heard me loud and clear, Sensei enters the room, checks me out from head to toes, then nods, satisfied.

“Yoi. Keiko. Ashita.”

God help me. He just said I’m starting work out tomorrow. He’s gonna kick the shit out of me.

****

My new daily routine is hell. I’m woken up by a gong, calling Sensei and his disciples for an early meditation. I’m not attending, not yet but I’m sure my turn will come.

Fucking land of the rising sun, the day starts at 4 a.m. and I can’t go back to sleep. 5.30 a.m. sharp: Mikomi arrives, resplendent in her flowery kimono, places a solid breakfast on my lap and leaves without a word. I’m sure she’s still mad at me about my behaviour during that nightmare. Or Sensei forbade her from talking to me. Anyway, I miss her so badly. I eat alone, but nonetheless do my best to respect the rules of the art of entertaining.

Mikomi appears again the second I put my hashi down, and leaves again just as fast.

Then the Master stands before me, ready to break me in pieces. Mikomi’s cares were so sweet compared to this monster of poise.

His strong fingers destroy my leg as he massages, mobilizes, and stretches it. I miss the needles Mikomi used for acupuncture, they felt like honey and I want them back. Instead big iron hands bluntly and mercilessly press on those fucking points, eliciting hisses and grunts from me. At first. Each time I’m complaining, Sensei whips me with a wooden stick, hard as fuck.

“Kurusai!” is the only word he knows, which you can translate into “Quiet!” if you’re in a good mood, or more likely “shut the fuck up!” in my case.

I’ve quickly learnt to hold back my screams and squeeze my fists as tight as my lips. I undergo his torture in a perfect Japanese style.

He instructs me to bulk up my arms so I can use the crutches properly. I spend the rest of the morning to eat my daily dose of home made weight lifting, jars of water or sandbags, and a shitload of push ups, my bad leg resting on my other calf.

Around noon, about a second before I pass out, my sweetheart Mikomi brings me a bowl of water and a bowl of soup with noodles and vegetables, or rice and unknown mushrooms.

First I clean myself up, then eat properly. In no time I collapse for a solid nap, before Sensei whipes me for the next torture.

The afternoon is dedicated to training to be back on my feet. My back is wrapped in a brace, so tight I can barely breathe but at least it stops hurting.

Day one was hard, really hard but Mikomi was there and it gave me strength. Holding back my grunts, I grabbed the iron hand Sensei held me out and stood up on my feet. Up on my two feet. FUCK I was standing up on my feet again. Ignoring the huge smile taped on my face, Sensei handed me a pair of wooden crutches and just left.

But Mikomi stayed. She was my sole goal. Go, Yankee, walk up to that beautiful doll.

I clumsily stumble, like a newborn deer, but my feet moved me forward, my hands firmly clawing at the clutches. FUCK! After months in bed, I was finally dragging myself to the other side of the room. Ha!

Exhilarated, I kept walking towards my Japanese sweetheart, her smile gave me enough strength to stay balanced.

“You made it Gaijin!” She finally spoke, breaking days of silence.

I’m so happy I could cry, but the shadow of Sensei’s whip kept my tears at bay.

“Iwai!” She congratulated me. Yeah I deserved it.

I couldn’t help but bend down and kissed her cheek, hugging her small features with one arm.

“Arigato Mikomi!”

She shyly blushed and sneaked out of my embrace and padded away.

“Follow me.” She whispered.

I somehow followed her steps that lead me outside. I’ve been stuck in that room for months, that day was my first time outside. And it really was worth the efforts.

The view was just breathtaking. Jesus, beauty was everywhere. Cherry blossom trees, traditional Japanese houses, temples, pines, bonzaïs, carps swimming in little pools, paper lanterns, rice paddies hung on the hillside, the ocean in the distance. The scents, delicate like so many fragrances. The sun, kissing my skin. The air, pure and fresh, filling my lungs. Mikomi, shining in the daylight, so proud of me. This place looked like Heaven.

The end of the day is my favourite. Japan is a treasure, the temple of millennarial arts. Sensei introduces me to each of them. Penmanship and kanji. Martial arts and the art of war. Fengshui and shiatsu. Samuraïs and katanas. Everything meticulously and flawlessly executed, from the way you cook and eat food to the way you tied up your kimono. Japan manners means perfection. Hence the billion of rules that dominate the daily life. Hence Mikomi.

It didn’t last long since Sensei noticed my lack in Japanese. I can tell he was impressed by my progresses both physically and mentally. He was touched by my interest in his culture and as how I got involved in the life of the village.

He quickly asked Mikomi to serve as a translator for all the lessons he taught me. Which was a delight. Which still is.

My handwriting is shit and I’ve a hard time staying still on the zafu while meditating but beside that, I’m making huge progress.

I follow Mikomi like I’m her shadow, we’re getting close again. I mean, we chat, we laugh, she walks with me to the bathhouse where I can walk and train my leg easier, in the hot water from the waist down. I noticed the way she got lost, her eyes wandering across my bare chest, but since I had the nightmare, I’ve only eyes for Angie. At least the distant memory I have left of my angel. The truth is I’m not sure about my feelings for her, all I know is I need her by my side. To keep going. She’s my hope.

After a pretty short time using my crutches and thanks to all the work out and sweet torture Sensei forced me in, I’ve been able to walk on my own. As I’ve become more capable, I started to take part in the village’s life and participate to the shores. People were shy and suspicious as first, but by the time I was able to walk out from Sensei’s house, we all got to know each other. I was not a Gaijin anymore even if they’ve kept calling me so.

Children found in me their main attraction. My sunkissed skin was still the lightest they’ve ever seen and my blond curls and blue eyes were considered as the utmost curiosity. They’ve only known almond shaped black eyes and straight hair. I became their favorite fairy wheel, and quickly replaced the jars I lifted every day.with eager children. I did weight lifting with a child taped on each hand, then walked miles with one kid wrapped around each leg, another on my back. The whole thing have them laughing so hard, their parents politely smirked when I passed their homes, children packed as a donkey. Even Sensei smiled at me, calling me silly.

After just witnessing men practicing martial art, my turn comes and I now am a decent fighter. I help every day to harvest rice, fruits and vegetables, fix houses and fences, even cook with Mikomi, which have Sensei pulling his hair out, some things being strictly reserved to women. I practice meditation at sunrise, go the the temple and pray, mostly for having Angie back. I enjoy the show of women dancing with ushiwa, the Japanese fan, sipping black tea with Sensei, while he keeps teaching me about life.

The only task I suck at is milking cows. Definitely not my cup of tea.

Days passed, this peaceful and quiet daily life fits me. Heals me. I nonetheless have noticed Mikomi’s mood slightly changing, her eyes sometimes red from crying at night, and all I got when asking her the reason was deep silence.

I talk to her friends but no one can help me understand. I should have suspected what has happened, I should have known she is in love with me. I suddenly realize I’ve known about that, from the very beginning. I’ve been fucking selfish, too focused on recovering, dreaming of Angie, praying to have her back. Getting back to her.

My dickhead self has just used her, ignoring my own feelings, ignoring hers, killing her hope to keep mine alive.

Hope. Mikomi in Japanese. Fuck. How could I have been so blind?

I have been blind but Sensei hasn’t. The wise man knew. The Master just knows.

One day, not different from the previous one, he just walked to me and stated.

“ Time for you to leave. Mikomi has to marry someone from her clan and you have to go back to your wife. You’re a good man Gaijin but you can’t stay.”

I nod my head. He’s right. It’s time.

Two days later, I’m ready. I packed all my stuff in a traditional bundle, along with enough food to survive during my first trip.

I said goodbye to the whole village, everyone had a little gift for me, mostly food and handwritten prayers for my safety. As an educated gentleman, I received each present within both my hands, bend down slightly in respect and whispered thank you in the best Japanese I could.

Chan and Zhou are in charge with walking me to the nearest pier down the hill, they’re just waiting for me to be ready to leave, impassible.

“Sensei, there’s no words strong enough to express my gratitude. You saved my life, you healed me, you kicked the shit out of me so I can stand up again, as a proud man.”

I glance at Mikomi who just blushes slightly. She offered to translate my words to her father but I’m giving her a hard time. Swearing before a sensei could have you struck down, and giving importance to someone extremely inappropriate. But I know she’ll manage it. She always has.

“I owe you Sensei.” Before I bend down as low as I can to show him my deepest respect, I notice a glimpse of emotion in his eyes, which is like a declaration of love here.

I stay bowed, waiting for his benediction, waiting for my own emotions to pass.

Sensei starts the traditional prayer to the ancestors, asking them to keep the voyageur safe and as I’m overcome by his wisdom and benevolence, I feel his hand on the top of my head. Which is not supposed to happen.

My throat tightens and I force myself to slowly breathe out, stopping the tears that threaten to appear.

It’s a great honour to have Sensei praying for you, and you have to behave as well, as a brave man. Any gesture of affection can be shown, but with one of your kids, it could be mistaken for weakness.

Weak, that’s exactly how my knees feel while he pronounces the last words. Instead of calling me Gaijin, stranger, he said musuko-san , son.

Oh God, how blessed I am.

My eyes meet his, my heart speaks through them: Domo arigato gozaimasu, gratitude Sensei.

Mikomi has left her father’s side, where has she gone? As hard as it’s going to be, I can’t leave without telling her goodbye.

I spot her slim features, beside the crowd. Another weird strict rule here: do not show your emotions, especially your tears. She’s alone with her tears and her sorrow.

Silent steps lead me to her, in the shadow of a cherry blossom tree.

I stroke her neck and feel her shiver but she doesn’t budge, her back to me, shaken by unsteady sobs.

“Mikomi… I have to go…” my voice trembles as my throat tightens. There’s so much things I want, I need to tell her, but Im running out of time. And of words.

“Ikanaide kudasai” she whines, likes she’s drowning.

I sigh heavily. I knew it’s going to be hard, but it’s looking impossible.

“Look at me.” I gently turn her so she faces me, but she keeps her gaze on the ground.

“Haanii…” I lift up her chin and search for her eyes. “Sweetheart. You know I can’t stay.”

She closes her eyes, tears lazily trailing slowly down her cheeks.

“Did I do something wrong?” She asks, hardly hiding her cries.

“ No please, Mikomi, don’t think that way. You mean so much to me, I couldn’t have made it without you. You know how much I care. I love you Mikomi, but not that way…” It breaks my heart to break hers.

The truth is I love her, with all my heart. She saved me, in all the ways a man can be saved. I love her more than a friend, more than a sister but there’s only one woman I want, one who stole my heart and my soul.

“I know. Not like her…” She averts her eyes from me, biting her lips to keep them from trembling so hard.

“I’m so sorry.” Oh God I’m so sorry.

“Don’t be. I’m blessed to have met you.” She buries her sweet face into my chest and lets it go, desperately clawing against me. I wrap my arms around her and hug her as tightly as I can. She’s been my rock, my hope, my mother, my Sun for the last 9 months. How could I live without her by my side?

Slowly, she pulls back and lifts her soaked eyes to meet mine. I’m sure she can read the deepest sadness in them. “I’ll miss you Cup.” She whispers.

Cupping her face in my palms, I thumb the tears that keep flowing down her cheeks. Before I break down and burst into tears myself, I bend down and gently kiss her lips. A long, fierce, heartfelt farewell kiss. That’s the least I could do for her.

“I’ll never forget you.” I swear I never will.

Melting into my palm, Mikomi runs her fingers along my wrist and trails few kisses on my skin. Fresh kanji, the Japanese ideograms sit there, inked in my flesh forever. Marks of the new life that has started here. Pleas for the life that’s waiting for me across the Pond. 見込み. Mikomi. Hope. Hope, I’ll need you.

It’s so hard to let her go, but I really have to leave or I will faint.

A last glance at Sensei, a nod to Chan and Zhou, a last squeeze on her hand and I turn around and just walk away.

Angie. Angie is waiting for me somewhere. I hope so.

Next step: America.

@dreamersdreamlife @narfea @smartieblue22 @bookgirlsthing

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@kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995

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@onceinabillionlifetimes @sajess98 @carlos8989

#jai courtney #hope #morning cup #angelina jolie #maggie q #fanfiction #unbroken

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sushilabassyear1fmp · 3 years

Text

Roma Poems and Poets.

Valdemar Kalinin

Poem ‘It’s going to rain’

It’s about to rain, getting darker, The leaves have long fallen from the trees, Leaving desolation where just an old man Roams, Picking handfuls of earth where Roma Perished.

During this war Nazis shot them dead, Roma seized and put in wagons, oh Filled with children and the Roma old, No mercy shown to a single soul.

Buried here auntie, grandpa, grannie, But God spared a small one, Who visits to imagine, The perished wait for him.

No monument stands, Except in the minds of the old, Woods and land bore witness, This older man declares: Roma are buried here, don’t disturb this land!

This poem by Valdemar Kalinin describes the story of a small child who survived the mass shootings and is now revisiting the ground they were shot and buried on, he describes how the Nazis showed no mercy they killed everyone no matter of age. In the final line he explains how there is no monument to remember the fallen and that the only ones who remember what happened there are the older ones who survived and Earth itself who had to watch silently. This is a nod to how Germany refused to accept responsibility for the Roma deaths and that there was no memorial like what the Jewish population got for many years, so the only ones who knew and were able to remember what happened were the old. Valdemar was born in 1946 just after the war which meant in order to have told this tale described In his poem he must have spoken to many Romanis which is not hard to believe as he spent a large part of his life (after serving in the Soviet Army) translating the bible into Baltic Romani (which he only finished in 2014) he has been an upstanding member of the Romani community despite my sources not being able to inform me if he was born a Gypsy or not. Weather he was born a Gypsy or not it is clear he has passionate feeling about the Romani Holocaust, it is easy to believe that he published this poem before Germany accepted paying reparations to the Gypsy community in 1979, though I cannot find a date for the publication of this poem.

Papusza 1908 – 1987

This interesting Gypsy girl who wanted to learn how to read and write despite not many let alone gypsies knew how to write, however from a young age she wanted to learn and she used many cunning tactics to learnt how. For gypsies who made their money through dancing, labour or music reading was not a skill they needed or wanted to know, but it was perhaps a good thing that she wanted to learn to read and write- despite her parents deeming the skill useless- it was very uncommon for women of her time to know to read and write, only the middle classes and up who went to school or got tutors learnt such skills. This skill came in hand the help her show others what she went through in those war years, as so many didn’t know how to write their stories went with them to the grave. When world war 2 started she was married into a clan of harp players (she was almost 30 when war broke out) the clan fled leaving their precious carts behind and hiding in the woods for around a year from ’43 to ’44, this poem ‘Tears of blood’ (originally written in polish) was her account of all that happened in those woods while being tracked down by the Nazis.

Tears of Blood (How we suffered under the German soldiers in Volyň from 1943 to 1944) In the woods. No water, no fire — great hunger. Where could the children sleep? No tent. We could not light the fire at night. By day, the smoke would alert the Germans. How to live with children in the cold of winter? All are barefoot… When they wanted to murder us, first they forced us to hard labor. A German came to see us. — I have bad news for you. They want to kill you tonight. Don’t tell anybody. I too am a dark Gypsy, of your blood — a true one. God help you in the black forest… Having said these words, he embraced us all… For two three days no food. All go to sleep hungry. Unable to sleep, they stare at the stars… God, how beautiful it is to live! The Germans will not let us… Ah, you, my little star! At dawn you are large! Blind the Germans! Confuse them, lead them astray, so the Jewish and Gypsy child can live! When big winter comes, what will the Gypsy woman with a small child do? Where will she find clothing? Everything is turning to rags. One wants to die. No one knows, only the sky, only the river hears our lament. Whose eyes saw us as enemies? Whose mouth cursed us? Do not hear them, God. Hear us! A cold night came, The old Gypsy women sang A Gypsy fairy tale: Golden winter will come, snow, like little stars, will cover the earth, the hands. The black eyes will freeze, the hearts will die. So much snow fell, it covered the road. One could only see the Milky Way in the sky. On such night of frost a little daughter dies, and in four days mothers bury in the snow four little sons. Sun, without you, see how a little Gypsy is dying from cold in the big forest. Once, at home, the moon stood in the window, didn’t let me sleep. Someone looked inside. I asked — who is there? — Open the door, my dark Gypsy. I saw a beautiful young Jewish girl, shivering from cold, asking for food. You poor thing, my little one. I gave her bread, whatever I had, a shirt. We both forgot that not far away were the police. But they didn’t come that night. All the birds are praying for our children, so the evil people, vipers, will not kill them. Ah, fate! My unlucky luck! Snow fell as thick as leaves, barred our way, such heavy snow, it buried the cartwheels. One had to trample a track, push the carts behind the horses. How many miseries and hungers! How many sorrows and roads! How many sharp stones pierced our feet! How many bullets flew by our ears!

She describes how they hid and travelled through the forest with bare feet and many children with them, moving on without food or water and no way to light a fire in fear it would give away their location in the forest. She then describes a German who came to see them, the German warns that the Nazis plan to kill them tonight, they then beg for the refugees not to tell the soldiers that they too are a Gypsy who has somehow escaped their wrath. She describes how even when they are all starving and unable to sleep how they love being alive because then they are able to look up at the stars, they want to live but the Germans will not let them. She then prays to the heavens to help them, to blind their attackers so that the children can escape, she describes both a Jewish and Gypsy child, this shows the Gypsy care, they even when poor would help out and house someone less fortunate than them. In this case help the Jewish child escape the Germans.

Then she describes the harsh winter they endure, how she wished for death as she has no clothes. She then talks of how the Gypsies do not understand why they are being treated this way, who thinks them criminals and dangerous why those innocent children are being hunted for their lifestyle and blood, they have done nothing wrong. Then she talks of the children and women who die that winter unable to endure the cold and hunger any more, she doesn’t simply describe them as children though she calls them ‘daughter, sons’ they were not strictly her children but her clans, her families and so her own children in a way.

Perhaps at the end of the winter she describes being ‘at home’ and how a Jewish girl comes knocking cold and hungry, despite having experienced many hardships this past year she lets the girl in and feeds and clothes her, showing her Gypsy hospitality once again.

She finishes while describing the heavy snow and how they struggled trough it. And with word of bullets flying by, this would have meant they Germans got pretty close to catching them a few times.

This is a story of pain, suffering and kindness. The pain and suffering of walking for days barefoot trough a rocky sharp forest with no food or water, shivering from the cold, in consent fear of being found. The kindness of the German who risked their life to find and warn them of the danger planned to the Gypsies aiding Jewish people to escape and giving them food and clothes when they needed it. The story is of resilience and still seeing the good in life after all that pain. A consistent theme in her poem is of her describing nature and often asking nature for help, this reflects the peaceful and harmonious what Gypsies lived with nature.

These poems give a haunting look into what Romani experienced during the war and will help inform my work, i may also chose one of these poems as my direct inspiration for the costume i will create.

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