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emikadreams · 3 years

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A prompt perhaps?? Could you do one that’s set after Nyx is born and Rhys has a nightmare about the birth (or something like that) but Feyre is there to help him? Or maybe just a scene of them together trying to recover? Feel free to break my heart and put it back together again

Here ya go love💕 Again pls forgive the silly mistakes here and there...hope you enjoy and let me know what you think

I'm here

Rhysand was shackled to the wall.

His body shook with exhaustion and it seemed his wings were hidden away this time and he breathed a sigh of relief sending bolts of blinding pain across his body. A sob rose to his throat which turned into a yelp as he looked at the floor that was filled with blood, only to find that his wings were spread out and nailed to the ground like meat. The wings-the one part of him that he hid away from most- was gone.

Everything he ever loved was taken from him, now his wings were gone too. The only thing that reminded him of his mother and the life he lived in Velaris became a distant memory. He felt a burning in his eyes and he blinked his tears away.

He coughed only to have the pain nearly bring him to his knees and his power started to slip away as he caught a glimpse of a head of shining red hair coming towards him.

Fear gripped him as he realised that he was stuck in a palace underground.

He knew that shouting for help would be futile.

After all, he knew he deserved this endless torture.

He had his mother and sister killed because he was too trusting, he couldn’t shield his entire court, just one place and he knew that his choices would weigh him down for the rest of his life.

He laughed helplessly, trying to get a grip on his power but it seemed to slide away from his fingertips, blood dripped down his arms and chest with every movement and he couldn’t help but scorn at the irony of it all.

The most powerful high lord in the history of Prythian was shackled to a wall trying to crawl away from fear like a pathetic worm. All these years trapped under the mountain made him see things that were beyond unspeakable but nothing shook him to his core as realised that no one hated him more than he hated himself. No amount of pain could ever lessen his self-loathing and for a minute he was at peace, thinking that it was finally his time to end his eternal suffering when he saw her.

He dropped his head in defeat as he felt more than saw the woman float up to him.

“Well, well, well. Look at the almighty Lord of the Night bowing his head for even a smidgen of my mercy.” Amarantha traced his face and he recoiled from her, mustering all his dissipating strength and spat in her face.

She laughed at him.

“Poor selfish, pathetic high lord or shall I saw my whore. Still, trying to show defiance huh?” Her lips split into a cruel grin before continuing to scrape her sharp nails down Rhys’s face, leaving blood in their wake. “It seems that you have a little bit of strength left in you, very well. Keir, bring her.” She commanded and Rhys felt his heart drop as he realised his pregnant mate was on the floor, her bones twisted in different directions, her body was marred with scars that resembled fresh lashings. Rhys struggled to get to his mate, he pulled at his shackles but they refused to give but Feyre called to him and Rhys felt a part of him die as she said, “Rhys, love, I’m sorry I put you through this hell. I love you Rhys so-” her voice cracked but she continued, “So much, and I would go through it all again if it means that I get to be with you and-” her hands shook as she placed them on her stomach, affection and pain glinting in them, “ Our son.”

“Oh that’s so sweet, too bad it’s all just a fruitless dream” Amarantha interrupted, mocking Feyre’s words, “ Time to say goodbye slut” Amarantha spat out before she plunged a knife through Feyre and his son before snapping Feyre’s neck.

“NO! Feyre! Please no!”

Rhys screamed in agony as he felt his heart break into a million pieces, he tried to rid himself of the chains that held him but they only tightened with each attempt. He struggled against them but they pierced into his skin and he cried out. He continued to scream till his voice was horse and he could no longer move a muscle.

He couldn’t go on with his life.

His mate, his son, his mother and sister, everyone-everyone he loved was dead.

He was exhausted.

He wanted to end his measly existence.

Rhys felt tears slide down his cheek and he didn’t care, not as his life was stripped of all meaning.

His head dropped as his sobs got louder but a hand lifted his chin and made him look at their face. He shut his eyes tightly and refused to open them but a voice said to him, “Rhys, look at me.” the voice was different- softer. Against his better judgement, he opened his eyes to find a pair of eyes looking into his, but those eyes didn’t belong to Amarantha, they belonged to Feyre.

“Rhys, it wasn’t real. I’m here love, our son is here. He’s happy and healthy and alive. We made it out. We’re free. You’re free.” With those words, Rhys woke up to find that he was sitting at his desk. He started to breathe raggedly but a hand gently lifted his chin and his mate was looking at him, with tears in her eyes and she smiled at him with their son in her hands.

Feyre gave him their son and Rhys was now crying openly but she sat on the arm of the chair and wrapped her arms around him, allowing Rhys to breathe her in she took her mate’s face and gazed into his tortured eyes and smiled without restraint showing with every inch of her face that she loved all of him before saying, “I’m here love.”

(p.s don't kill me pls)

@story-scribbler @evolving-dreamer @thebonecarver (cuz i thought you’d like this.)

let me know if you want to be tagged for my fics

#feysand #feyre #rhysand #nyx

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thereyouareivebeenlookingforyou · 3 years

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ACOSF Thoughts - SPOILER WARNING

(ACOTAR series, ACOSF, and Kingdom of Ash spoilers are all below along with my thoughts after finally finishing A Court of Silver Flames!)

Was SJM trying to get me to hate Rhysand in this book? And kind of Elain and Amren? Even a teensy bit Feyre? Don't get me wrong- I love Rhys. ACOTAR and ACOMAF Rhys is one of my favorite characters and my literal favorite book boyfriend EVER. So could someone please draw me a map to where the hell he went because that Rhys was NOT IN THIS BOOK?!?!?

Rhysand in ACOSF was every bit the territorial fae bastard in this book that Tamlin was in ACOMAF. He lied to Feyre about something HUGE. Nesta shouldn't have told her like that, but someone needed to tell her. And the way he treated Nesta sucked.

And Feyre was every bit the pretty bride who blushed and had lots of sex and had a male who shielded her from what was really going on (you know, her impending death?) that she accused Tamlin of wanting to make her into. What the fuck was happening with them in this book? It's great to make Feyre a High Lady, but then she should be treated like one, not lied to?!? It's fine to make her more domestic, she deserves peace and happiness, but not at the expense of her autonomy.

And while we're on it, I kind of hated Feyre's pregnancy storyline. The thing about writing immortal characters is that you have so many chances to play with time. There is no reason that 500+ year old Rhys and 21 year old Feyre who were together for like one year?!?!? needed to have a pregnancy story here. They are IMMORTAL. Why can't they have time together, just the two of them, before introducing a pregnancy? What's the rush? They are immortal High Fae who will be alive for CENTURIES to come. Forget years, give yourselves a few decades together first! Your whole relationship so far has been 50% trauma-recovery and 50% saving the world/trying not to die!!!!

Feyre's pregnancy felt like the author showing through and overshadowing the characterization—I have to think some of this is SJM becoming a mother in the last few years and wanting to write that into their story, but still. (SJM also did this with Yrene and Chaol in Kingdom of Ash - is the eve of a huge war really a great time for a pregnancy? Wouldn't a healer know how to not get pregnant accidentally?) I also didn't love that a Feysand pregnancy was this huge part of Nesta's story. Can she not have five minutes of the spotlight? Feyre already got 3 books. (Sorta kidding.) (You know what I'm not kidding about? Not liking the name Nyx at all...but who cares I guess.)

If it's so well-known that Illyrian baby delivery is basically a death sentence for High Fae females, why would Rhys not be like 'omg Feyre, yes, let's have a baby, but let's not have sex while you're in that form which is optional for you like is he this 'the most cunning high lord' or not?!) (Also they wouldn't even have Feyre try shifting her body to give her Illyrian hips when otherwise she would FOR SURE DIE like try it?!) All that magic and no one's invented the cesarean?!?

(On a separate pregnancy note, y'all realize the Kingdom of Ash scene where Aelin falls through the worlds and sees a 'heavily pregnant' fae whose mate throws his night-like power towards her to slow her fall have happened during the timeline of this book, right?!? Wild.)

I love Nesta. I love her. I love her arc. I've loved her this whole time, but her coming to terms with herself was great. Her finding peace was great. I was already in the she doesn't need a redemption arc, she needs a therapist and time to herself away from her sisters camp before reading ACOSF, and I only feel more strongly after reading it.

I honestly think time away from her sisters and Rhys with people who weren't constantly judging her (Cassian, Azriel, Gwen, Emerie, Clotho, the House) was just as healthy and necessary for Nesta's healing arc (NOT a redemption arc, a healing arc) as giving up some of her more harmful vices like nonstop drinking and complete isolation was.

So much sex. Like as one of my friends put it, 'this book is filthy, y'all!' It was kind of overkill, like I was already sold on their relationship, but sure, why not. But if nearly all those scenes cut away instead of getting super descriptive, I would have liked this book just as much. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The part with the Mask and the kelpie was so good! It was crazy, and creepy, and her rising up with this army of the dead was so great. Also when they went to the prison for the Harp!!! So good.

A couple weird 'repeats' from ACOMAF... 1) Nesta 'knowing' that Cassian 'needed to hear' her say the exact phrase "You're mine" which is right out of the mating bond acceptance chapter from ACOMAF stuck out to me, especially combined with hearing that Nesta had never told another person she loved them as we found out in the scene where she saved Feyre at the end. I was expecting 'I love you,' especially with them starting out in a 'just sex' relationship. 2) That 'just sex' thing and how obviously Cassian was into her and she was into him but she says she wants 'just sex' also reminded me ACOMAF, when Rhys and Feyre are at the inn and she disappoints him/lies to herself let's be real by telling him she wants just "fun."

Loved getting more of the Night Court palace on top of the Hewn City mountain. Dream house. That bathtub. Swoon.

I may really be in the minority here, but I did not like that Cassian and Nesta are mates. Tamlin tells Feyre in ACOTAR that it's rare for people to have mates at all. And honestly, I see why accepting the mating bond was so hard for Nesta as someone who didn't want to be fae in the first place, and I do not think she needed Cassian to be her mate to choose him forever. I wish they had CHOSEN each other and not also been mates. I think it would have been just as strong, and healthier for Nesta. (And also...if not everyone is mates, why can't they just fall in love? He won her heart, she chose him. I was fine before they were mates. I also think that would have nicely set up Elain rejecting the mating bond later, which she clearly wants to do/has basically done (did y'all read the Azriel extra chapter?! Anyway)

At the end of the day, the Inner Circle (except Cassian/Azriel) bothered me with their treatment of Nesta, even the intervention at the beginning. Was Nesta in need of help? Yes. Were they kind? No, especially not Rhys/Amren. Elain was just as traumatized/self-destructive for a while. She hardly ate, she spoke to no one, she lay in bed all day, Nesta checks that the high windows don't open because she thinks Elain is suicidal, etc. Nesta is also traumatized, but her trauma presented more angrily, less beautiful/sad woman lies around being beautifully sad (like Elain in ACOWAR or Feyre in ACOMAF), and she's entirely condemned by the IC for it (and by a lot of this fandom, let's be real).

I love Cassian. Love him. Looooove him. He stood up to Rhys for Nesta, defended her, was honest with her, accepted her, forgave her for what she actually did wrong (belittling him for his background/hurting him on purpose), but told her she herself was not wrong or broken (@ Rhys, @ Amren, @ Feyre, @ Mor, are y'all taking notes? Cassian and I said she was not broken. Not in need of fixing or redemption.) He kept reaching out his hand.

Plot wise, I also loved that Nesta/Gwen/Emerie ended up doing the Rite! That twist surprised me in a good way. Devlon and any other Illyrians who doubted them can suck it. VALKYRIES!!!

And finally, I LOVED the Nesta/Gwen/Emerie friendship. It made the book (it Made it, y'all. Pun intended). I loved reading about Nessian and I love Cassian, but these three and their friendship was my favorite part of the book, hands down. So great. I love female friendship - it's so underrated as a concept - and this one was amazing, and I'm glad it was such a focus of the story.

This was long, so thanks for sticking with me if you did! Not really interested in angry/anon discourse, but I'd love to hear y'all's thoughts!!!

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fandomtrxsh19 · 3 years

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So, when I read ACOSF, I made kind of play by play notes as a listened to it( I read the audiobook) so.........here’s the chaos

HEAVY SPOILERS FOR ACOSF!!

CASSIAN SAID FUCK

WHOA there’s a LOT of swearing in this

“It’s SEVEN in the morning gods damn it” -nesta archeron

OVERSIZED SHIRTS FOR THE WIN

Feyre and Rhys have 5 houses? Not surprised...

full, inviting breasts......BIG BOOBS OMG CASSIAN YOU HORNY SON OF A BITCH

7 siphons to keep his magic under control? Dayum

So, she rode this unnamed male like a fucking roller coaster?

Depression sex? Depression sex

“Her father was ashes in the wind” DAMN THATS EDGY

“A moment of release among the darkness inside her” NESTA BBY THIS ISNT HEATHY

“She avoided both of them” not surprised

OOOOH RHYS HATES HER TEA IS BEING SPILT

So, depression sex and depression alcohol? Yup

*checks chapter count* 80 CHAPTERS??!?! Oh shit this is gonna be a triiiip

OOOOOOOOO RHYS AND NESTA BEEF

Feyre trying to apologize to nesta........she’s trying

“You’re done, Nesta” The fuuuuuck.....

So, nesta’s moving and training with cassian...........Feyre, this isn’t a good idea omg

Feyre holy shit what the fuck are you doing, you TOTAL HELICOPTER SISTER?

“I never want to speak to you again!” damn

ELAIN TRAUMA!!! Yay???

MOR FOCUSED CHAPTER!!!?

she has brown eyes? Ok

FUCK SHES WEARING A BLUE DRESS FUCK

nesta knows about mor NESTA KNOWS ABOUT MOR!!!

“I am worthless and I am nothing. I hate what I am.” DAYUM I’ve been in that exact mindset numerous times. I can relate, Nesta

Briallen? Who the fuck is that?

Scars being trapped in magic? Good fuck that’s dark

“Ooh a dark skin character? Lit

OH SHIT SHE CANT FLY HER WINGS ARE CLIPPED

Is her name Emery?

“I am the monster your fear” BBY OMG GET THERAPY

Gwyn? Seems a bit aloof

“Two gentle conversations” GOOD JOB

Fairy lights omg lol

Nesta reading smutty books.....I’m imagining this omg

THE HOUSE IS ALIVE? Sweet

OMG ELAIN SHIT!!!! BBY

“All she wanted to do was touch him” OOOOOHHHHH NESSIAN

“All I need is a hot meal and a good book.” Mood

Nesta’s worried about Mor??? REEEEEEE

“Nesta needed Feyre more than she realized.“ OOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOO FAE BARGANS

They’re bound by magic on the body?? Ooh

IT’S TRAINING TIME BITCHES

“I don’t hate you too,Cassian” OMGGGGGG REEEEE

Nesta SMILED

THEY MENTIONED VALKYRIES!!!!!

“You might be my only friend.” HMMMMMMM

*hears how cassian was born * OMG HOLY SHIT CASSIAN

*hears cassians backstory* DAMN THESE CHARACTERS NEED THERAPY

OOP SLIGHT DEPRESSION SEX

OOP CLOTHING REMOVAL

“I’ve loved you since the first moment I held you in my arms.” HMMMMMMMM

I’m loving this Nessian sparring training.

ELAIN! SHES IN THE STORY KIND OF

Elain has small boobs........same

“I thought I would drop by to see how you were doing.” AWWWWWWWWW

Yayy.....awkward sister talks........

“She was the monster.” Nesta.............I can relate.

Nesta’s angry at Elain.............

Elain’s trying to reach out and Nesta’s denying it.

MY HEART

AGAIN...THE👏RA👏PY👏

“No more seeing her sisters without her permisson.” That’s smart.

Soooooooooo......Rhys is now a German Shepard.........?

OMG CASSIAN KILLED EVERYONE THAT HELPED KILL HIS MOM........good for him

“Use that training and make me.” OOOOOOOMGGGGGG

Rhys is overprotective of Feyre and shields her......daaaaaaaaaaaaamn

“What exactly happened in the cauldron?” FEYRE BAD IDEA BAD IDEA BAD IDEA

Again, Nesta, ✨THERAPY✨

Put a stop to what, D-does the IC know of the ✨depression smut?✨

“There was touching, but with her permission” WE 👏STAN 👏A KING👏

THAT ASKS👏FOR👏CON👏SENT👏

“Who do you think I am?” “A drunk fool who’s wasting my time?” OOOOOOOHHHHH SHOOTS FIRED!!!

Emery and Nesta to Emery’s cousin: GO HOME YOUR DRUNK ASSHOLE

*hears Nesta’s grand✨mama✨* me: grandmama, it’s me....ANASTASIA

Bruh...NESTA BIT CASS’S EAR

ugh the tool

“Baby making” hehe lol

“Nesta like gwyn”...............could she also be biiiiiiiii??????????!!!!!! YAY FIRST FRIEND IM PROUD OF YOUUUUU

NESTA SMILES AGAIN YAY!!

Alright, Meryl is BITCH

GWYN’S A QUARTER NYMPH?? Cool

“She’s failed everything.” BBY

HER POWERS? HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT SILVER FLAMES

ICY FIRE??? FUUUUUUUUUCK

Nesta must’ve been petrified being surrounded by fire

It’s a dream? THE FUCK

WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT SHE WAS DREAMING????

Cassian saw HER TRAUMA?????? FUUUUUUCK

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HER POWER IS DEAAAAATHH FUUUUUUCK

THE BABY HAS WIIIIINGS!!!!!!

Why is Rhys angry about the wing thing?

Ohhhhhhhhhh shiiiiiiiiiit the tool

*hearing the possibilities of half Illyrian baby* OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH FUUUUUCK OMG

“I loved it when you fucked my mouth cassian?” GAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH NEEESTAAAAA THIS ISNT HEALTHY

“What could go wrong?” DONT JINX IT

fairy monsters? OHOHOHOOOO

NONONONOOOOOO NOT AN ASH ARROW

BLACK EYES???? Fuck fuck are they in the cauldron?

OMG THE KELPIE IS DOING SHIT TO NESTA!!! Are they on the cauldron?

the MAAAAAAASK

ohOOOOOOOMGOMGOMGOMG SHE SUMMONED THE FUCKING DEAD REEEEEEEEEEE

Omg NESTAS POWERS ARE SO FUCKING COOL

She LITERALLY HAS AN UNDEAD ARMYYYYY

death HERself........badass

“Because you and cassian has been giving each other sultry looks all morning” SHE KNOWS

“For the first time in her life, she finally felt good in her own skin.” GROWTH

Omg Nesta created a swooooord!!!!! Cool

ITS INFUSED WITH MAGIC??? HELL YEAH

“I can’t lie to her!” SIIIIIIIMP

“I’d be careful when fucking her.” Oh amren

FUUUUUUCK FUCK BOOOOOOOOO TAMLIN

“You will not touch us.” YES TELL HIM

“I can’t believe Feyre ever loved tamlin.” ME TOO

“Elain saw everything Nesta did.” Daaaaaaaaamn

OOOOOOOO NESTAS PIIIIIIIISSED

OOOOOOOOOOO SECRETS FEYRE’S PIIIIIIISED

Nesta messed up and I think she realizes that

Rhys is pissed now and wants to kill Nesta....SHIIIIIIIT

Nesta: heads for a tavern me: NONONONONO GODS DAMN IT YOU’VE COME SO FAR

“I will fight for him. For us. Until I can’t anymore.” FEYRE IS GONNA BE A GREAT MOM

“Wishing to disappear into nothing.” I’ve been there.

“Cassian knew Nesta hated herself, but didn’t know how sometimes she wanted to unexist.” I RELATE TO THAT SHIT

“She had been born wrong.” AWWWWW BBY SHIIIIIT

“Was she worth being counted?” I CAN RELATE

*hearing Nesta blaming herself for her fathers death and for the horrible things she’s done, saying she can’t fix it* SHIT IM CRYING (I’m not joking)

“ I deserve nothing.” I CAN RELATE BITCH IM ACTUALLY CRYING

*hears Cassian calmly reassuring and comforting her* AWWWWW I NEED THIS QUOTE

CASSIAN CARES SO MUCH FOR HER I LOVE THIS

(I really needed that cassian talk. I literally wrote most of the quote down just in case. Thank you SJM)

EMERY CAN SENSE THE SEX HOLY SHIT

“After he’d fucked her with her fingers...” O NONONONOOO

*skips to chapter 52*

Lanthis??? Who the fuck is that?

“Gwyn and Emery are my friends” SHES GROWN SO MUCH!!!

26 dimensions? OH THIS IS SOME DOCTOR STRANGE SHIT

IT CANT BE KILLED

cassian and Nesta really went *yeet* .......... I’m sorry

THE SWORDS NAME IS ADORAXIA!!!!!!!!!!!sounds like a dnd character IDEAS

OHOHOHOOOOO BLACK THRONE AND A CROWN DEATH QUEEN NESTA WITH HER HAIR DOOOOOOWN

Rhys vs Cassian standoff *western duel music starts*

NESTA APOLOGIZED FOR EARLIER IM SO PROUD

Did Elain have a vision? DID SHE???

“I want you to seduce him.” NESTA THE HIDDEN BARD ROLL FOR PERSUASION

Mor teaching Nesta the waltz? NESTA AND MOR CAN NOT HATE EACH OTHER

Are they back at their childhood home? Because oooooooooooof ✨ childhood trauma✨

MOR AND NESTA HAVING A CONVERSATION YAY!!!!! (This’ll make rping them so maybe easier)

“We’re in a book!” Holy shit they know. HIDE THE FANFICTION

The relationship between Nesta, Emery, and Gwyn is so wholesome

“Oh FUCK you” .... NESTA

“I was just checking on dessert” MOOD

MOR AND NESTA ARE HAVING A FRIENDLY CONVERSATION

I sense tension between amren and Nesta

ERIS WANTS NESTA????

“I’m not with you.” Lier

A SNOWBALL FIGHT WITH THE BATBOIS??? Holy shit they do have one(1) brain cell

A sleepover with Emery, Nesta, and Gwyn? SIGN ME UP

“Do it for the miniature Pegasus!” INSIDE JOKES

OOOOHHH i see the gwynriel ship

Wait....HER POWERS MADE THE HOUSE BE ALIVE??? Sweet

Alright 2 months til FEYSAND baby

The mating bond between cassian and Nesta?????.............

“Say it, SAY IT” GODS DAMN IT NESTA SAY THE FUCKING THING

So, Nesta’s afraid she’s gonna loose her humanity?

EMERIE NESTA AND GWYN ARE IN THE BLOODRITE? Fuuuuuuuuuck

OH NO EMERIE!!!!!!

“High Fae bitch” PUT THAT ON A SHIRT

OMG OMG OMG HELL YES VALKRIES

oh Cassian you restless bastard you

*hears Emerie’s backstory and their heart to heart* AWWWWWW I LOVE THEM

“The morrigan.” The fuck Eris?

“She’d hit the archway of stone” OOOOOOOOOOF

“For being my friends when I didn’t deserve it.” AWWWWWWWWWW

What about Feyre’s pregnancy???? Hewwo?

“Lord of bastards” heh true that’s cassian alright

Wait, OTHER set of wings

CASSIAN!!!!!!!!!!

“Now, I’m going to slit your little throat.” FUUUUUUUUCK NONONONOOOOO THIS ISNT CASS FUUUUCK

What’s the trove?

NONONONONOOOO WHYD HE GET STABBED SHIT HE GOT STABBED

Nesta’s pissed.....MAGIC TIME

wait wait wait wait wait HES NOT STABBED HELL YEAH!!!!

“You are my mate, Cassian.” ITS ABOUT FUCKING TIME

Nessian: kissing when the world is in ruin

“She started bleeding hours ago. “ BABY TIME???

*hears the blood and feyre’s appearance*!FUUUUUUUUUCK

So, no C section? OOOOOOH SHIT THEYRE DOING IT

IM SCARED IM SCARED IM SCARED

“Silent babe?” Shiiiiiiiiiiiiit

Nesta Nesta Nesta What the fuck are you doing???????? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

SHE HAS ALL 3! ONONONOOOOOFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOOOOOOSHE PLUCKED IT FUCK

SHE STOPPED TIME?????????

WHOS the female voice?

“ I love you, Feyre” SHE DID IT IM SO PROUD!!!!!

What is she doing what is she doing what is she doiiiiingggg?

GIVE WHAT BACK?????

WHAAAAAT? A BARGAIN WITH THE FUCKING CAULDRON???

feyres alive? FEYRE’S ALIVE!!!!!!!

NESTA THE MVP!!!!

*the sister hug* AWWWWWWWWWWW

AWWWWWW I LOVE THE NAME NYX!!!!

How much did the Cauldron take from Nesta, tho?

FEYSAND IS BEST PARENTS

Alright, I want to see LOADS OF WHOLESOME FANFICS AND FANART ABOUT DOMESTIC IC AND ELAIN AND NESTA GOT IT?

#acotar #acowar #acofas #acomaf #acosf #acosf spoilers #feyre archeron #elain archeron #nesta archeron #rhysand acotar #cassian acotar #azriel acotar #morrigan acotar #mor acotar #amren acotar #gwyneth berdara #emerie acotar

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rosereview · 3 years

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Book of the Month (Mar): A Court of Silver Flames

Okay that was a crazy ride… holy mother sh*t. I don’t even know where to start and I have so many thoughts it feels like my heart and head will explode. Just like my Chain of Gold review (which you can find on my post page) this will probably be long and full of spoilers so sorry in advance, but I just need to get it out. Also these are the other books I read in March (it was a crazy month with a SJM and Cassie Clare book!):

A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J. Maas (5 stars)

Chain of Iron by Cassandra Clare (5 stars)

Siren’s Lament Season 2 by instantmiso (5 stars)

Frankenstein 1818 edition by Mary Shelley (unrated)

Characters

So to start I of course need to talk about Nesta, her being one of the main characters, but also because it’s NESTA. Like many people, I hated Nesta for all of the previous books. Like actually hated. She just made me so mad. The only time and reason I didn’t totally hate her was during the war in ACOWAR and mostly because I wanted Cassian to be happy and I could tell they were mates. But after that, especially in ACOFAS, I disliked Nesta so much it hurt. For her whole life she (and Elain, but I’ll get to her later) just let and expected Feyre to do everything for them and keep them alive. And after all of that, she blamed Feyre for being Made into a Fae, when Feyre was literally the only reason she was alive. As an older sibling myself, that made me so mad. I would never rely on my younger sibling because I would do everything in my power to keep them safe and provided for (like what Nesta did for Elain, which also riled me up because Feyre never got the same treatment). Going into this book I was worried that this whole thing was going to be about Nesta being a whiny bitch, but instead, the redeeming feature of Nesta, was her knowledge and acknowledgment of how shitty of a sister she’s been. I know that it took her a long time to actually be nice again, but I was happy that she actually knew that she was being terrible and deep down wanted to be better. She wasn’t just being terrible because she felt entitled which was the vibe I got from her before, but instead was terrible because she thought it was too late to get better. After that I thought her journey was very relatable and heart wrenching. While I still was mad every time she got mad and was mean to Feyre or any of the Night Court group, I could still sympathize how she felt like she was intruding on their family and that she didn’t fit in.

Now let’s talk about Cassian— I love him. That’s about it. JK… Okay, I have always loved Cassian, but this book made me appreciate him in a more emotional way. All of his insecurities had me crying for him while relating to him so well too, and when we heard more about his mother and how when he was younger he didn’t get physical touch which is why now he always needs physical touch… MY HEART COULDN’T HANDLE IT! God, that was such a precious moment when he needed to hug and kiss Feyre’s forehead, because that’s how he best shows affection and needs affection warmed my heart in so many ways, but also made me cry. And although it hurt me when Cassian would doubt himself and feel lesser because he was born a bastard, I still felt that pain brought Nesta and him closer in more ways. It wasn’t just him helping her, but she helped him too, and both allowed each other to grow on their own but also together. I fucking loved that.

Relationships

Now I’m just going to jump right into relationships, because I feel like individual characters besides Nesta and Cassian can only really be talked about through their relationships with other characters since it was only Nesta and Cassian’s povs in the book.

So first let’s talk about (obviously) Nesta and Cassian— I mean I already started to talk about them together above, but this book was so powerful for me because of the way the two of them worked together to heal themselves. That was beautiful. But also it is a tiny bit annoying how both Feyre and Nesta were unaware of their frickin mate bonds! I know, I know… neither were born Fae so they don’t have the same knowledge of the mate bonds that everyone else does, but come on! I knew Nesta and Cassian were mates since they first met! And I know that it definitely wouldn’t have been smart or healthy for Nesta to accept the mate bond at the beginning, but at the end when she still has to talk to Cassian like he isn’t her mate, after they literally consummated the mate bond on several occasions, I was kind of annoyed. I know it was still part of her growth, but also wild that she still was playing dumb like that. But I’m happy they finally admitted everything at the end.

Next let’s discuss the Archeron sisters— So really their relationship at the start just made me sad, seeing none of them get along (except Feyre and Elain). Especially since I still kind of felt like everyone should just be falling at Feyre’s feet and apologizing about how terrible they were for mostly her whole life (even Elain, since she also never helped keep them alive in the human world. Really she was just as bad as Nesta but wasn’t an outright bitch about it). But even though Nesta was encouraging nasty behaviour from them (because she was also being mean) Feyre and Elain both were just as mean to her sometimes. I mean, when Elain went to the house and Nesta and her got in an argument, Elain was just as harsh as Nesta was to her. But I guess Elain has just never been my favourite person. I’m still a little pissed how both Feyre and Nesta do everything for her and she just sits still and looks pretty, but I’m betting that will change in future books. Anyways, I was very happy at the end of the book that all three sisters got on good terms and even went to visit their father’s grave together. That last scene got me pretty emotional.

Nesta & Emerie & Gwyn— In contrast with the Archeron sisters’ relationship, I loved this new friendship that Nesta found with Emerie and Gwyn. I think now that Nesta found those two, she really appreciates the relationship between family that isn’t blood, because they are now like her sisters too. I loved both Emerie and Gwyn so much in this book and I was so happy that Nesta found them and let them into her life. Feyre found a family in the Inner Night Court, and Nesta found her own people with her Valkyries, and that felt very poetic to me. The family you choose is the family that sticks with you forever (although you can choose blood family too, and I’m glad Nesta found her way back to Feyre and Elain, but I’m glad she found more family too).

Nesta & Amren— Okay, this relationship had me very mad for most of the book because I just wanted to scream at Nesta so bad! I can’t believe that Nesta got mad for “choosing” Feyre’s side, when literally Feyre and Amren were family first! Amren and Feyre were close and part of the Night Court family before Nesta came in, and even though I was happy that Nesta was making friends with Amren, she can’t get mad at Amren for being friends with Feyre too! Especially since she was friends with Feyre first! Again, not saying that Amren and Nesta being friends was a bad thing, I just got mad that Nesta was being so weird about it when she has no claim on Amren to be just her friend. Sorry I just had to get that off my chest, but I am happy that both of them seem to be friends again now :)

Nesta & Rhysand— Throughout the book I totally understood both Nesta and Rhysand being unfriendly to each other, but boy was I in tears when Rhysand fell to his knees before Nesta because of what he did for Feyre. That was the most beautiful brother-in-law/sister-in-law moment in the entire world. Really I don’t want to even talk about Nesta and Rhys’s relationship in most of this book because I feel like that’s now in the past, I just want to focus on their amazing family relationship going forward, because now they will be in-laws from both sides (Feyre and Nesta being sisters, and Rhys and Cassian being brothers).

Nesta & the House— This was a beautiful relationship and I was beyond happy that Nesta became best friends with the House. Super heart-warming and those are honestly my only thoughts. I can’t wait to see more of Nesta and the House in the future!

Cassian & Rhys & Azriel— Again, I just love the three of them! Their brotherly bond is adorable, but it also makes my heart break when they all take on each other's pain, because it’s just so beautiful and sad at the same time. I don’t know how else to explain it. When Cass and Az still feel hurt about not being able to help Rhys when he was underneath the mountain, and the pain Rhys and Az feels for Cass’s past, and the same for Az’s past. It’s beautiful but sad because I can just feel the love they have for each other and the true pain they feel and it hurts me too.

The Night Court Inner Circle— This is also just a short pop in to say how much I love this whole family together: Rhys, Az, Cass, Feyre, Mor, Amren, and now Nesta, Elain, and Nyx. They are all a big beautiful family that makes my heart ache just thinking about them. I can’t wait for more scenes about all of them interacting with baby Nyx, because that will kill me and give my life again in the best way possible (again not sure if that made sense, but that’s the only way to explain it).

And for the big finale in relationships… my Elain/Azriel/Lucien/Gwyn thoughts— to start off, I’m not dissing any ship anyone makes and I think all thoughts are valid. But I don’t know, for some reason I just don’t think Az and Elain are meant for each other. I just think it’s too obvious and cliché (for lack of a better word) to have all three brothers fall in love with all three sisters. BUT I also see how it is obvious and cliché to have mates end up together too. So I really don’t know what to expect. But one thing is for sure— and again no hate please— but I totally understand why Elain and Lucien are mates and “equals”. Throughout this book it is mentioned multiple times that Elain doesn’t belong in the Night Court while Nesta definitely does (like the scene where they visit the Court of Nightmares but I do remember it being mentioned other times as well). This also explains why Azriel’s shadows don’t go close to Elain, because she literally represents light. Lucien on the other hand, is literally the son and heir to Helion, High Lord of the Day Court (even if he is unaware at the moment), the ambassador to the Spring Court (full of light and flowers), and ambassador to the human lands, somewhere Elain misses very much. I know none of this should mean he has any claim to her, but it definitely makes sense why they would be considered mates and “equals”, because Lucien’s birth and life matches the light that Elain represents. Just some food for thought. And concerning Gwyn and Az, I just think they would be really cute together, honestly. I think that Az being the first one to rescue Gwyn on the most traumatic day of her life is significant, and will have something to do with Gwyn’s own healing in some way, but of course that doesn’t have to mean sexual or romantic. I thought both of the extra bonus scenes at the end of ACOSF (yes I’ve read both) are really setting up for the next book which will cover Elain and Az’s journeys, but I don’t think that means they will get together. I thought Rhys’s comment about Elain in the Feysand one was very true, and Elain isn’t the innocent helpless girl we’ve been made to believe. I think she has a lot to share from her own story, and I think that Az needs to have his moment in the spotlight too.

Plot

Lastly, let’s talk about plot, which is essentially the next war that may be gearing up to happen. I hope for all of my babies’ sakes it won’t happen and it’ll just be a little negotiation and everything will be well, but I have a feeling that won’t happen. This dude in this lake is very intriguing though (sorry, can’t remember his name) and I’m excited to see what will happen next. But most importantly, I think in the future a lot of shit will happen with Mor too, because since she was gone so much in this book I think that’s SJM getting us ready for a big Mor moment. I have a feeling there was more to her negotiating on the other continent than we know about yet, and also I feel like there's something more about what happened with her and Eris that I’m excited to find out about.

I just feel like this was more of a character driven book (which are my favourite books) than a plot driven book, and a lot of the information we learned in ACOSF will be more important in the future books. So for now, I’m okay with not talking about it (although side note, I’m really happy that crone queen bitch is dead. I did not like her!)

So thanks for reading till the end if you did. Sorry for any grammar or spelling errors; I’m too tired to read over this.

Until next time!

~Rose Reviews

#a court of silver flames #sarahjmaas #a court of silver flames spoiler #acosf spoilers #acosf #acotar #nesta archeron #cassian #nessian #elain archeron #feyre archeron #rhysand #azriel #amren #morrigan #lucien

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crystalmach1 · 3 years

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As someone who just reread A Court of Silver Flames and has c- PTSD I want other readers who hate Nesta to know some things:

1) I don’t know if it was intentionally added or accidentally added , but the pAssage that healed Nesta the most was the breathing exercises and still- minding and rn ? That’s the thing that’s literally made a very bad day tolerable and healable at the same time, in the real world, to a real survivor , so slow your roll on the lack of trauma- NOT- informedness you seem to have

2) it was the first time I’ve seen a survivor allowed to be both female and angry at an abusive father via neglect and the character was white. Normally an author would throw that at the Bipoc scene and just preach wholeness

3) she was allowed to hit rock bottom in realness and they staged an intervention against the lingering anger( healthy healing vibes- again become trauma informed healers: I see you gywneth berdara!!!)

4) the real side of trauma is no matter how ace or aro you may be an abnormal level of trauma can still make you hyper sexual out of fear to feel something and is something I, an ace person and survivor , have felt conflicted about before and I actually felt seen that she wasn’t just “ perfect” and loved by everyone without actually looking into herself and her feelings but also that those words felt real and harmful to her even as they stitched the wounds closed

5) fantasy novels get you out of your own head and show a survivor that no matter the problem , you don’t have to FEAR the solution, there just is one typically. This is also accurate as a self help guidance tool that many people use to stop being so into perfection that they overlook the POSITIVE outcomes of a situation ( healthy post c-ptsd romantic encounters) This requires the brain to reword its speech patterns to “ oh if I just feel what I’m feeling that could happen or it could still go well that way too, I never saw that before hmmmm”( looking at you Emerie)

6)Nesta didn’t magically get friends she didn’t deserve : she saw their pain and respected an invisible trauma line when no one else could see their pain for 2-(gwyneth) ~ 300+ years ( emerie) they repaid her small kindnesses of being SEEN with being Seen With Her. Nesta has Quality time as a friendship love language and she was away from her family in her rebellion, so it actually makes sense that she has to remove herself with people that could make space for her alone. That didn’t just happen out of nowhere.

7) you weren’t supposed to like Nesta. Her mother was aweful and she was healing inter- generations trauma from her grandmother on down to literal Feyre, Rhysand and Nyx. She literally saved everyone by breaking herself in DEATH( see others headcanons about this😉✨) She couldn’t have healed them any other way because even Rhysand was unevolved at the time it occurred but guess what? Nesta healed everyone DEAD or ALIVE

8) you can like a series and not love every character, I don’t personally like Elain but I was doing trauma response / healing research today and guess what? One of the four types we almost never learn about is called... wait for it ... FAWN. And guess who everyone’s calling FAWN? And who’s mate has a daddy even Feyre called a Beast? Lucien and guess what Lucien’s type is called FLIGHT and guess who has a dad who literally has Pegasi? LUCIEN! So guess what Elriel shippers... they are endgame. And I didn’t even have to diss a character I don’t like because I adore Lucien. As a feminist I cannot wait to see him become a better feminist character arc than even Rhys while healing his own family

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