#why arent u afraid to lose me

[etovest]

hello! do u have any garden headcanons that you'd be willing to share... i loved how well you managed to grasp them in so little words ❤️

hallo sorry it took me so long to answer this! (and Thank YOU!! for the nice compliment :)) )

also boy do I have headcanons or just what I think could happen if they end up together (AND ALIVE?) so here we go

Warren's absolutely inept at cooking he Tries and he Knows how to survive on his own but he's more than happy to leave Gordon alone in the kitchen and let him work his magic (I also don't think Gordon's that good either but he's willing to try for warren)

Gordon sleeps with his socks on, Warren says it's stupid and Gordon pulls out his phone with that article saying it's easier to fall asleep with them on and they have a Debate abt it

also think both of them have a sweet tooth but Gordon's actually pathologic like three spoonfuls of sugar + milk into tea and Warren's like arent u afraid of losing your teeth and Gordon's like (girls who like sweets when they meet bitches that snort sugar)

Warren strikes me as a morning person or even if not necessarily loving waking up early he's like someone who once wakes up is Awake whereas Gordon's fully nonfuncional in the morning and Warren has to drag him around he pretends to hate it but he doesn't of course

i think neither Warren nor Gordon are Conventionally Pretty cos that's boring but Gordon was in a metal band he's since long embraced being a Freak while Warren's still self concious in the silent way but Gordon genuinely thinks he's the most handsome man alive like he's truly convinced Warren is this mythical relict that only the pure of heart can find and appreciate which makes Warren feel so embarrassed but after a while he embraces it and they become so obsessed with each other from an outside perspective it's frightening

idk why but it think they both try to become vegetarian for Waffles (it makes sense in my head) but they like full english breakfast too much so they Just can't it's funny to me ok

Warren says he was a punk (pointing at Gordon) just to see Gordon get red in the face and explain At Length just how much punk and metal are different genres because he was born in the eighties so He's like That and how while he can see the strength of certain messages conveyed through punk music it's just Not at all like metal where techinque and actual musical ability is valued but also he played bass so maybe he's more chill about it but he still wants to point it out ok he isn't Punk and Warren does it because he's insane about Gordon getting heated and at a certain point he just tunes him out it's like asmr to him

they both have Issues and so it takes them a while to get it together like Warren is in love but won't say anything because he thinks what they have is too good to ruin and Gordon still thinks Warren is Fragile and also possibly straight? but once they Do get it together they still don't define it because it's Too big and too personal to have a name like I am 100% serious when I'm saying that I think their relationship is Overwhelming in the most romanticly haunting sense but they balance it well it works with them exclusively

both of them are tactile people but Warren won't initiate any contact he's more like a dog that accepts pats but doesn't get up to search for them

Warren's a tidy person and Gordon's more "There's method to my madness" but he's an Archivist so he's got every important document cared for and has extremely good spacial memory i like to think that a few years down the line (in my universe where they are happy and live together) they become sort of telepathic and when Warren needs something he doesn't even have to ask he's just like "Have you seen the- and Gordon's there "Top right corner of the shelf in the bathroom" and they do this All the time

I HAVE MORE? I think but IDK how to be normal so this will be all for now thank u and thanks again for the sweet compliment have a nice LIFE ANON 🌟🌟

#ask #red valley podcast #garden red valley #gordon porlock x warren godby 4EVER #OK bye.. thank u... #also please DO share if you have headcanons of ur own i would love to compare them like trading cards

[doing-something-unholy]

♱ About ♱

18+ only, minors dni

Text post tag: #Father Speaks

Ooc tag: #Father Rambles

Pictures of me: #in persona Christi

Audios: #literally ;) or on soundgasm at /u/sinhound

Aesthetic tag: #aes

Art tag: #art

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Taken anon signatures: dream,🐱,🖤,🍃,🐇,🛐,♡,🪐,🌺,🌌,🐲,🔪,☦️,👁,🥺,☿,🦇,👑🖤,🪽

Likes, favorites bolded: Hierophilia, c*tholic priests, collars, bondage, cnc, humiliation, praise, terato, blood, mild knife play, breeding, abo, petplay, age difference, size difference, edging, overstim, dirty talk, objectification, fucked up dynamics (in fiction! think Hannibal), power imbalance, manipulation, corruption, orgasm control, cum

… to be continued ;)

Limits: detrans/misgendering, misogyny kinks, piss/any body fluids that arent cum, blood, or spit, raceplay, weight-based degredation/feederism

Rp preference: I honestly get super nervous in the dominant role with anonymous people, I strongly prefer playing the submissive. If you're dead-set on getting me to dom please send me an ask with your limits and likes! I won't publish it, but it really helps me to know what you'd like from the scene <3

---

Father Adrian Lupine is in his early 20’s, average height, and heavy-set. He has curly, wavy auburn hair that reaches the top of his collar, and soft features: brown doe-eyes with long lashes, a round jawline, a button nose, and full lips with a defined cupid’s bow. He has square glasses. He’s a little (a lot) insecure about his looks, his weight and ‘soft-ness’ in particular. If he were completely honest with himself, he really doesn’t mind being ‘pretty’ instead of ‘handsome’ (though he wouldn’t describe himself as either.) but he was teased mercilessly for it when he was younger, by his peers and his parents.

Adrian is bisexual, with a slight preference for men or masc people, and has known since he was 14. He also grew up Catholic, and knew to keep his mouth shut about it. He is completely in denial about being anything other than a cis man, but is still very respectful of other people.

Adrian is mostly submissive and a bottom, but can be persuaded to dom/top, and is secretly very kinky for a priest. He might not have much or any practical experience, but he does have an internet connection and fantasizes a lot. 

Adrian is outwardly very friendly and polite, soft-spoken and kind. Inwardly, he’s anxious and lonely, feeling stifled by the collar while being terrified to lose the stability priesthood offers. He is very aware of the reputation of the Church, and notices who shies away from him when he’s wearing the collar. He knows there’s nothing he himself can do about that, but he goes out of his way to be as polite as possible in public, finding small ways to make sure people know he’s not ‘like that’, that he won’t berate others for not being a part of his religion. It’s really only on very rare occasion, usually alone, late at night, and post bottle of wine, that he allows himself to wonder why he became a priest knowing full well what the church is like. 

Recently graduated from seminary and moved to St. [Name Pending] about a year and a half ago, but much of that first year was spent not holding mass. Instead it was spent renovating the church, which had sat empty for almost a decade. The building itself was quite grand back in the day, but the town it’s in has seen slight decline in recent decades, and after the last priest died it wasn’t a priority to keep it updated. Adrian secretly suspects the diocese put him here specifically to get him out of the way after being a little too open with ‘constructive criticism’ of the Church while in seminary. St. [Name Pending] is a very quiet parish, not a lot of catholics left in town these days, and Adrian is doing his best to make his church useful in ways that aren’t strictly religious: community food gardens, charity drives, movie nights, anything he can to build his reputation with the community. It’s a shame he has secrets that leave him afraid to let anyone get too close, lest he get reported to the diocese. 

—————–

AU's: Adrian is a human cis man by default, but if you want to rp with him in any au’s just let me know! The main two options are transmasc and/or werewolf, but im down for just about anything. put this man in situations ;)

—-

The person behind the blog is 23, transmasc, bisexual, and I am definitely not catholic. You can call me Wolf, just put ooc in an ask if you want to ask me something. I will probably get something about being a priest wrong but this is a smut blog so is it really that deep?

This is a sideblog! I won’t be able to follow you back, reply to posts, or send asks.💔

#about #father speaks #father rambles #in persona christi #literally ;) #aes #art #updated 3/31/24

[playboynanners]

i wanna start off by telling u i am sorry!! i wanna tell u about all this crazy shit in my head, and want to open up and want to talk about my feelings but no matter what, i just cant make out the right words...? like it feels like cant properly put my thoughts and emotions into words i guess??

all i want to do right now is cry and scream and let it all out because its killing me inside. i cant take it anymore. i feel weird. i dont want to do anything. i always feel tired. i dont have any energy. a part of me broken. something is def weighing on my heart. i just feel so fucking suffocated. i feel like i am so far behind in life that i will never catch up. everyone is doing so many things with their lives. and i am just here. i really dont think i can do this its getting dark again. and im afraid. im too tired to carry on. i want MYSELF back bro is that too much to ask for? i deffff know its getting bad because even sleep and music dont help and i feel sick all the time and i just want to disappear. i really feel like there is no happy ending for me . thats why getting through the days is hard rayen i honestly from the bottom of my heart know its all for nothing. u guys are waiting for me to get over it, to finally do something with my life, and i know u guys are getting impatient. but what u guys dont know is that im already gone. i dont like who i am. there is nothing good about me. i am sick of wasting my time. i am worn out. i so fucking tired. the anxiety consumes me at times i feel like i cant breathe i cant think straight intrusive thoughts of self distraction consume my mind i am sooo fucking sick of this version of myself!!!!! im fucking tired of the poor choices i keep making. i truly believe i have hit rock bottom. this is the humblest i have ever been because my ego has nothing to be proud of. i know i knowww it is important to be gentle with myself but its also crucial to be honest. im not taking care of myself. im doing drugs, im on social media all day. i either dont eat healthy, or i dont eat at all. i dont exercise. i watch things that arent positive and go to sleep and wake up late. i am sick to my stomach as i write this. i just want to go up from here because i cant live this way anymore. i dont wanna live this way anymore. but like if you never felt like the way i do right now... the drained , depression . WORTHLESS feeling ... then u cant say shit about me "getting better starts with yourself bs" LIKE UH ? YEAH I HATE MYSELF AND DONT GIVE A FUCKKKKK ABOUT NUN SO WTF DOES THAT EVEN MEAN??? like i honestly didnt even think i would be alive at my age i thought i wouldve been dead by 20 so u can only imagine how lost i feel lol. i dont know what to do with my life and i feel like im just wasting away most days. and i dont fucking know how to fix it. maybe this is my time for me and im supposed to be enjoying it for exactly what it is? like i dunno i just know i always fucking ruin EVERYTHINGGGG . i casually sabotage all my positive relationships with negative delusions because my life doesnt feel real unless something dramatic and destructive is constantly occurring. i really want to kill whats inside of my head. i hate living like this day after day. i just want my pain to end bro . i see how everyone looks at me like i’m a burden, how they fake concern only to switch up at me the next second. i don’t want to be this way, im so lost and alone and i just don’t see the point anymore. this is the loneliest i have ever felt. i don't have a shoulder to cry on when im sad, i have got legit no one to go to. i have noooo tears left to cry dude. my heart hurts so much. my insides are burning. i dont know how to help myself. i legitimately try and i make it worse. i wanna scream all this hurt and pain out. can i just lose my memory just so i can take a break from feeling this way? im not sure how long i can handle this alone anymore all honesty .

AND i wouldnt say im "addicted" to drugs and alcohol (JUST YET lol) butttt what i hate about liking them is that once you know how that high feels and the break from reality you get from everything you will FOREVER know how good it felt and thats the problem. u can be days, months, years of being clean. but i know when you quit its gonna be hard years down the road. i would take it alllll back and not start doing any of it. it turns from "just one time trying it" to "i promise this is the last time" but all honestly i dont know how to stop or be normal in this world sober anymore.

and to sum it alllll up i just want / need someone who can hug me and tell me that im not as worthless as i think i am i feel so fucking empty sometimes and its so exhausting to feel nothing and everything at the same time.

#tw depressing thoughts #@hate myself #journal #made with tumblr #sad aesthetic #thoughts #depressing shit #love yourself #sociopath #kill me

[shi-kiori]

Note 11: Outbursts

Today, i've realized that neglect is a powerful friend yet enemy.

I feel like growing up, i had to get used to the fact that a lot of people surrounding me were emotionally unavailable or constipated in sharing affection and in expressing feelings. someone always had to do a grand outburst and suddenly it would be like that never happened. now that im older, im realizing that its those things that chain u in the neck as u mature.

my brother broke down today because of a break up in a serious relationship. it kind of rattled everyone at home. i couldnt even process what just happened only that i felt like i had to be there for him. but its the aftermath that i couldnt comprehend beyond me. i called my parents shortly after that to share and it didnt even feel like anything new at the fact that they were so quick to dismiss it and move on; that we couldn't do anything about it. and while it does hold truth to it, its that sweet, deceiving taste of neglect that lingers in my mouth as im typing this. im at a loss, i dont know how to make of what im feeling inside.

im angry, but i understand. im disappointed yet i understand. i feel like i want to help though i understand why i shouldnt.

i wanted to get so angry at my mom then and there because this is the exact reason why people like my brother break down so grandly. people at home dont know how to express feelings that are too intense, too sad, too angry. everyones so quick to dismiss and say its not a big deal. and this is the type of home ive grown up to. we can lie to each other and say that we are emotionally in-tune with each other but the simple truth is that we arent.

im....i want to say im frustrated but i cant even bring myself to be because its just happened so many times that it feels better to emotionally numb myself to people like my parents. theyre never gonna change the way they are and im not asking them to anyways. its just a weird pill to swallow when it happens to people like my brother who cries the way like the day he was born. it feels like all the air is punched out of ur lungs and u feel like ur on fire but the slow burning kind. i can vouch that its not any better.

all this childhood trauma just makes u laugh because of how cliche it is. emotionally distant parents, all the siblings struggling to empathize with one another and lastly, there being no space to talk about things, to unpack.

its probably the worst feeling in the world to lose control of the situation and thats how i felt earlier today. you almost want to just pinch a part of ur skin if its that whats gonna make u feel like ur holding on to something.

anyways, point in blank is that id have to admit that i was afraid for the first time, ever. i realized that he only felt that way and reacted that way was because nobody at home made him feel like it was ever okay to let it out in front of others. my parents say they do but from what ive seen all theyve ever done for my brother in times like that was make him feel like his relationship problems are nothing major. and while there is truth to that, ive learned that it does sound invalidating. and nobody ever wants to feel that way.

the eldest daughter saga continues for me, once again im forced to numb myself in the ice that is my family's emotions.

--end--

#shikioriposts #voiceofiris #parents what is new #eldest daughter tingz #we need family counselling at this point

[anoms-world]

i bring the little me with the little past the little tummy the little show to to the unconscious field wide growing eyes she's hungry and i know what she want, what kid want is fun if cant find fun they ruin to create little fun … two separated demons lions twins one had to grow/duplicate with nothing/everything to defend/attack the other yet one of them had to enter the void when the other is around …me the player with nothing/everything ….

once i wished upon a star and my wish become true

ok thanks so i should keep pretending to save my humanity (uneiq humanity like anyone else) i guess what i am already into suit me the most its just dont feel the same lately i can tell you the damage is already done call me crazy i just think to increase it to decrease it with specific\certain something/someone else to do the analysis/stimulation a method used to do if i cant limit it/distract it myself. to no where to let it be. its the way i do things to let it go to forgive it to be real numb (not planning to forget unless it was age problem where u lose and forget things anyway) when in real i might regret and might change for worse to me yea its possible don't ask me why feel fear lately that's why her dark sky catch mine sometimes from the past watching my words are all i did back then i say to my self they will remeber that be careful the truth no one is careful as they think about themself to compare is the way how adults cause massive destruction to the world karma must be on the act they arent comparing in this generation

seems my shadow remember things\truth i dont know from the episodes feels sad and heavy yet dont know if the feel of sadness came from the fact the pc running slow and short that might turn off permentally

im going backward mentally to sink in the past something off spirtually i might be here yet not mentally at all so yea you should keep going i will be back no promisise haha yea no promises

sometimes i act as infp, being raised by one im afraid to tell her my truth, i actually told her last time, as expected she didnt take it will so i tryed to prove to her nothing change yet i have no idea what she think now, probably something stormy i hope she ok i cant pretend anymore im sick of pretending for every indivual human being its also sucks being myself knowing i have to switch to useless sicknes of pretending field anyway i signed for sort of routine club for friendship yet i dont want to pretend, well sinse its routin its ok to be robot i hope i will be ok O_O

killing an aspect of myself huh?! the main aspect of myself?~

[angelyk-fruitcake]

#why arent u afraid to lose me #lose me #quotes #feelings #thoughts #feels #emotions #words #quote #sayings #never enough #quotations #sad quotes #afraid #my thoughts #random thoughts #feel it #feel #feeling #sad

[ibolyafagyi]

(teen vogue about stray kids go live)

#i wonder if ill grow out of them #once the angst wouldnt be as applicable to me as when i first heard them #theres no use thinking ab future but im cautiously optimistic that itll be fine if i do #i was sorta afraid abt this w all my obsessions and then had a pang of guilt once i was losing interest #i dont wanna say ive grown anymore bc duh #but i think its nice to think abt their metaphors and all that #i kno teen vogue and a pop group arent the end all be all of wisdom n i wouldnt describe my experience the same way #its the similarities that count tho #its nice they ran 2 series w 3 episodes each to reach an answer #or well sthg that changes sthg its hard to use the word answer bc lifes not a questionor test or story thats why the key motif was ditched #bc its like that! ure stupid and u pick up things and u search #n every time u reach a bigger conclusion u think aha answer #ure wrong n thats fine life is trying n its nice to have these experiences #fitting to have a sappy episode like levanter bc u need a breakdown to process shit before u can meaningfully move forward #what ive been looking for isnt the key #im like the autumn leaves dont know which way im blowing #i dont think my go live is the same as theirs #i dont wanna run #i just wanna do whatever i want n thats mostly quiet ordinary stuff #n thats fine. i appreciate the metaphors #i love these dudes

[supbbam]

its like. q is telling george to come out to wilbur but george is afraid that would change things bc #afraid of rejection and q is like “bro he is literally in love w u. tell him”. its straight out of a fanfic and its making me lose my mind. why does quackity have to deal w these idiots. like seriously the “wilbur is the only person george lets touch him” “wilbur saying his love language is physical touch by talking abt george” and q is like “u guys obviously are whipped for each other” but they still arent connecting the dots its just so insane

Quackity is like that one friend where he goes "just confess to him, trust me he likes you back" ands its just so funny how hes always between georgebur when they mention each other and that cracks me up so much 😭😭

#quackity the real mvp here #georgebur #quackity

[aetherknit]

He literally said "I don't want people to take this any way"

He would "feel weird if people were talking directly to him or talking about him in a conversation.." (He trailed off but it's clearly like about other pronouns)

He said - and guys pay attention to this - "I feel like my pronouns are he/him". he did emphasize "my", and only said he/him in this sentence

Just because he doesn't feel uncomfortable doesn't mean it makes him comfortable!! Your pronouns are valid no need to force them on other people!!

This isn't directed at you ofc I just wanted to give some quotes from the stream when I saw you didn't watch this part haha

actually super appreciated anon thank u so so much for the direct quotes like i cannot brave the embarrassment of those donos ToT <3333 i wish desperately that ppl could read subtext.... im not trying to argue dream will scream and die if u call him a they/themmie but if it feels like he (for some reason) wont BLATANTLY say hes against they/them for himself there might be a reason beyond "omg hes trying to communicate to 70k ppl secretly that hes nonbinary and im the only one smart enough to pick up the vibes"

anyway. MORE PRONOUN DISCOURSE ASKS BELOW

no okay because smth that pissed me off sooo bad about ppl getting defensive about "omg dream is all pronouns he told me himself" is that i never said ANYTHING abt what ppl do in their own priv spaces like.... personally i find it a bit odd if its beyond jokes but if i went crazy over everything i found "a bit odd" in mcyttwt i would never stop. BUT ASKING DREAM DIRECTLY...... like IDDDCCC ur justification -- ITS WEIRD!!!! anyways in essence: i agree

yeah thats the right term dont worry!! i agree.... ultimately it kind of sucks because i know a lot of these ppl come from a desire for validation and i empathize but its suchhh a terrible outlet for it </3

^ grouped because i have nothing to add except i agree and u are all so smart.

OMG no worries + i appreciate u supporting me....... to be honest i would do it if i was fighting on tumblr but those twitter ppl are bloodthirsty like ive seen what they can do (shivers) im not afraid to admit that i will lose to a mob of stans crying wolf(self)

but genuinely u bring up a great point about how equally dehumanizing it can be to project onto ur streamers like they arent real people with feelings. tbh i dont really understand why those ppl are in this fandom at all sometimes if they arent satisfied with who their CC actually is

THATS WHAT HE PREFERS . USE THOSE. how hard is it :sob: its funny bc twitter stans are genuinely so afraid to speak out against this kind of thing too -- despite getting absolutely destroyed (100+ qrts in 30 minutes im honestly still in shock that my tweet could be SEEN by so many in such short time ?!?!?!?!) i ended up gaining ten followers...... like i was expecting to be on 50 blocklists but ppl who agreed just silently followed to avoid joining me in the depths of hellfire ifg

#discourse / #ask #guys i can see the light we're almost htere #if i misspeak on anything im so sorry its 6am but ik these are sensitive topics so lmk <3

[circethegoblin]

STAYING ALIVE MASTERPOST, FROM A BROKE TEEN WITH ADHD

here you go. some down to earth tips on how to not die metally nor physically.

tired of those "drink three liters of water everyday uwu" and "wake up at 5 am" and "buy a bath bomb and a fec mask and some other things you don't have the money for" shit? i'm here for ya.

1. NOT DYING

eat at least three meals a day, one of which m u s t be warm and above 300 kcal (it can be istant ramen with an egg added if you have to)

you technically should shower everyday, but we know how it is. A change of clothes is sometimes enough.

DRY SHAMPOO AND BABY WIPES!!!

keep bottles with water everywhere. On your desk, near that spot on the floor you always end up sitting on, near your bed, basically whenever you know you spend a lot of time. No need to get up and go to the kitchen will help. Obviously change the water in the bottles as often as you can.

Get some form of physical activity. It doesn't have to be much, you can for example replace scrolling on tiktok by walking around your room and scrolling on tiktok! Brilliant, isn't it? Obviously, running or doing those 10 minutes workouts from youtube is better, but you are still getting like an hour of walking.

Buy blankets. Steal blankets. Summon blankets from other dimensions. Just make sure you have a lot of warm, soft blankets in your house. You will thank me when you won't have the anergy to wash your sheets (just take them off and throw some blankets on your bed), or when the power goes out.

If you have pets, ALWAYS keep spare food that'll last for a week for them.

things to always have in the kitchen: milk, eggs, flour, rice, pasta, yeast, cheese, oil, a leafy vegetable, onions, tomatoes, apples, patatoes, some flavourful sauce, sugar, salt, spices and an emergency chocolate bar. You can make a lot of food with those. Just make sure you won't eat the chocolate too fast.

Have a lot of spare batteries. A lot.

Get urself a flashlight, a lighter, and a pocket knife.

Remember the apples? eat one a day. if you don't like apples or you can't eat them for any other reason, you can take a kiwi, banana, orange, basically something that will give you vitamins and non processed sugar.

do the dishes before your sink starts developing it's own ecosystem

drugs from that one guy around the corner = very bad time

2. NOT DYING INSIDE

Open the damn window.

Don't watch so many commentary videos. You are probably not even checking the sources, so you can easily make unjust judgement, and like. did you even hear of half of those people before?

make a discord server just for yourself. get into the habit of writing little things that happened to you there. rant about the fanfics you read. or the movies. vent there if you don't have anyone you can vent to. write your ideas there, write e v e r y t h i n g. make a section for passwords, for quick ideas, for your to do lists. you won't lose it as you do with sticky notes or notebooks. there is no risk anyone will see it. oh, and when you'll have a strong impulse to tell emily that you hate her? write that message in your private server and list all ur arguments. look at tat the next day and decide if you really mean that.

life sucks. come to peace with it.

cuddle ur pets if you have them

1 hour a day without a lot of sensory input. if you have to, reduce to half an hour.

if you find yourself scrolling endlessly through social media, make sure it's pintrest (just don't compare urself to the people here; if you have issues with that, tumblr may be better)

delete. twitter. from. your. phone.

influencers are lying to you; maybe not even intentionally. remember when you were watching that cute-aesthetic-productive morning routine, and you were wondering why your life isn't that pretty? why your room is a mess? why you cannot for the life of god be aesthetic 24/7? its the filter. don't worry about it, their lifes arent that nice either.

realize there's actually nothing stopping you from screaming as loud as you can right now. like there is no physical barrier. think about it. realize there's no actual physical barierr to many other things.

your body is your body. you can decide how it looks like; just remember it's in your greatest interest to keep it healthy.

3. BEING A LITTLE BETTER THAN JUST ALIVE

If you wear make up, take it off before you go to sleep.

moisturize your body; everything is better when your skin doesn't feel dry

have a one brand of cosmetics that you love and buy things mainly from it. they often have sets of products that complete each other. i like ziaja. it's a polish brand, it's surprisingly cheap and has nice quality

cleanser, moisturizer, face mist

of you can, change your sheets once every two weeks

do the dishes before your sink starts developing it's own ecosystem

do a deep house clean once a month (don't beat yourself up when you don't tho)

keep your workspace organized (it doesn't have to look organized to other people, remember)

sunscreen

cook your own food

keep a calendar

no money for scented candles? got ya. make a simmer pot: throw some apple peel, a couple of cinnamon sticks and whatever spices that smell good you have into a pot, add some water and simmer. boom. your house smells good, and you haven't spend 20 dollars.

If you really like candles, buy scented wax melts. it's cheaper.

Buy urself scented mists. they're pretty cheap and will make you feel A LOT better.

keep your clothes clean. if you aren't sure if that shirt thats on your chair is dirty or not, throw it in the washing mashine anyway. better be sure.

if you can, make your bed right when you get up

wear clothes that make you feel good. put some effort into your outfits. really.

4. OTHER PEOPLE

be nice to essential workers.

if you have money, give tips.

remember, you do not owe anyone love; it is not something you can force. even if they saved your life. even when they helped you in your darkest time. if you don't love them, you don't.

you don't have to be in a romantic relationship to be happy.

if you want to, date! date everyone! date girls, date boys, date nonbinary people! date people completly different than you, date people from different countries, date them!!! just make sure they're kind and won't kill you. even if you don't end up in a relationship, you can learn a lot.

don't be afraid to piss off people that deserve it

smile to strangers :)

5. NOT FAILING SCHOOL

heard of dark academia? check it out

romanticize the heck out of studying

do not let your studying be just reading the same partagraph over and over again. it won't work. believe me.

seterra for geography, quizlet for everything else

try to make yourself intrestet in whatever you are studying (watch veritasium, listen to podcasts about weird history facts)

notes are for you and you only; don't worry about them looking pretty. doodle on margins, make weird metaphors, squeeze in as much info as you can.

when you're studying, listen to music without words/in a language you don't understand.

chew gum while you study

get the forest app, get attached to the trees, focus.

don't feel guilty for taking breaks

grades aren't everything, but they are important.

eat something in school

don't just use the cheapest pens. invest a couple dollars in something that will make writing enjoyable and smooth

those study with me videos? they're great

if you like to argue with the teachers, take care of your grades becouse. they may not like you afterwards.

be nice to your classmates and help them with homework. if you don't do your homework they'll help you

executive dysfunction won't let you study? been there. sometimes it's better to wake up ealier tommorow and do that homework then.

don't feel guilty for failing a test

go to the goddamn class

don't pull all nighters oh my god don't especially on weekdays

6. OTHER LIFEHACKS

don't get involved in the crime, and if you do always have a believable explanation why you were doing it

have different alarm sounds for every day of the week

set a daily limit of money that you spend

great hobbies that don't require a lot of money; urban exploration, writing, hiking and learning other languages

thrift stores

don't eat grapefruits while on meds

nail polish removers dissolve most strong glues.

if you have a cut on your skin, desinfect it. do it. please just do it.

always have pads with you. even if you don't get periods, at least one of your friends probably does

sign up in your local library. its free

#life hacks #life #not dying #staying alive #no one will see this #who cares though

[misterbitches]

Dude yong jie’s character is literally unbearable this is like how not to write a vharacter 101

Our first intro to him is stalking, then PUNCHING someone in the LIVER bc the person he “loves” was fucking drunk and he blames his best friend? Then his mom is like “lmao actually um hes psycho” so anything they try to do retroactively like how they peppered in HIS DAD DIED A BLOO BLOO but previously it was also his OWN MOM going “im afraid he’ll lose his humanity” so not only was there no breathing room then it’s bumrushing him into their lives as best friends and it doesnt work. This dude sucks and he isnt even fun to watch. You know how breaking bad has one of the most abysmal main characters of all time but all of us were fucking ENGROSSED but the show made it clear that every enemy he faces, even the DEA, we want THEM to win (it is also a class analysis but woreva) so i am like wtf they show us literally nothing here. He’s just there. Wasting space and being awful. What is the purpose of his character in ssu’s life? Once you rape someone it is fucking over full stop but he didnt even fucking manage to start off in any compelling fucking way. Absolutely bonkers dude Esp bc theres at least a base moral code ie DONT HARRASS GIRLS UR “INTO” and thats why mei fang the absolute mad lad beaut was like “lmao nah i hate u”

Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo?????????????????????????????????? WHERE IS THE WRITING HERE? WHAT IS THE SCRIPT? awhat is the PROGRESSION? This is such an insanely fucking dumb plo5 point i rly cannnnjnnntoeiwijshsgsgsgsgsgsgeggwiwowiw GORL

Lets talk abt the good things in the characters (theres none for yong jie hes just there being a little bitch)

Li cheng - himbo dumbass “manly” cutie and the manly stuff is fun cos it gets heaped on and yet every bit of him can be extremely “feminine” and jubilant. Great.

Muren - seems >:O but i rly like that hes actually pretty open in his own way. Side note: he is so thin and willow-y i rly loke tall pretty boys (and all women lmao) and he doesnt do it for me but He suits the character like his body and the way his character is. Also u gotta be weird and he is

Hsinng ssu (girl im never gonna learn how to spell their names it’s too much work cos the eng alphabet andnromanization is terrible) - mild mannered, good son, a homosexual confirmed confirmed g”(awesome!) great friend, good brother (and i guess his reward is being raped, great message!) and someone ppl like

The establishment of the three of them and their distinct personalities happens within minutes and then we meet

Yongjie - what about him? He may have an MI, okay, but we dont know for sure and oh gee that doesnt matter actually bc u have to get urself treated and also not be terrible. Not even psychopaths do the shit he does BC THEY HAVE TO GET HELP. Why the parents didnt get him help and are just realizing their son is terrible? Who knows . His purpose seems yo be “boy obsessed with brother like his actual brother” i dont care id they arent related in that way bc that’s not the fucking crux of incest and it is so insanely Fucked every thing to do with incest is almost always a disgusting powe r issue. WHAT PURPOSE DOES HE SERVE? WHAT DO WE ONOW ABOUT HIM OTHER THAN HE IS A FUCKING JERK AND AN IDIOT AND SUCKS AND I HATE HIM AND THAT HE WANTS TO STALK AND ATTACK THIS REALLY AWESOME FUCKING DUDE OK

There’s no returning point deom rhe line they croased byt theyb set him up for failure. Even in the fight hes a fucking cheater hes a goddamn immature rat they know he fucking sucks but he just sits there and waits for everyone else to move around him. A fucking selfish prick with nor edeeming qualities snd hes also a violent rapist stalker. Really great that thry have no clue how to make this dude actually have any humanity or likeability. Hes the man from 365 days basically except not even that hot and at least he kidnapped her but “WAITED” for “CONSENT” but in that movie’s world nothing mattered and it was bad and the point was to have a horny movie. But this show is for younger ppl and also IT HAS RULES AND IT KNOWS WHAT BAD ACTIONS ARE???? Soooooooooooooo in all these other dumb salacious books there seems to be just a mutual agreement that it’s fucked up but totally normal i their movie’s universee (it isnt and it is still just bad filmmaking)

Also it is up to yong jie to figure put how to get over it and understand that his brother is concerned for him. Bc it is. His brother. There’s a reason that incest is never advisable and thays bc there is no way in that situation that people aren’t somehow being coerced. There has to be a sort of split in the pursuer and the person being pursued bc one person is not thinking that way. (This is why people who find out they are related after the fact and havent grown up together is something thatms really unfortunate. They had no idea and they have to grapple with that but that is another scenario and it happens bc THEY DIDNT GROW UP TOGETHER.) i have experienced this from a (not immediate) fam member and i was the vulnerable one, had less powr, that is how it must go.

Thats why the power imbalance is scary and none of this is acceptable but it begs the question how did they get to this point? But the show doesnt even address that bc they cant bc theyre not original. And power imbalance does not mean automatic absolutely not territory. Theres things we dont like (in my casee i hate age gaps a lot) but i will avoid that.

I havemt seen “right or wrong” and i have no desire but from what ive garnered from ppl i like who liked that episode, the show outlined the moral issues with it. Idk if they did it in a way i would have preferred (again no desire) but at lesst from what ive heard it...tries? Idk i dont see the need for these if they dont give us a reason why these ppl should be together and there’s several lines that cannot be crossed that were. Basically it’s like stockholm syndrome now and there’s no choice for him, it goes beyond power imbalance and “legality” so to speak and now it’s just entrapment.

Theres not even avoiding or enjoying. Even for MODC as stupid as i found the secondary rship and negligent even like ok. Fine. Whatever. His boyfriend is 100 but at least it was semi agreed upon. It is what it is, go forth. I will criticize it but at least it was the story and as stupid and gross as i think it is and they will probs break up (idc what the show says) at least there are set ups that can make us see “why” it works and oh, gee, their whole rship relies on a different fucked up but at least at some point it could possibly be transcended. The foundation of youngjie is “rape entrapment and aw now they are in lvoe” BITCH NOOOO???? Where is the REASON? And why should we root for them? (There is none and when the Thing happens it is now impossible for that not to be absolutely foundational to their rship lmao and that is never something that goes away.)

I would like to say theres nothing romantic int he flashbacks i know thats what theyre trying to twll us but the actor is 30 and that child is like 8.

Im not missing the point bc i see it with my eyes and it sucks. If you cant even write the character well then how do you interest something heavy and work out the links? The only solution is yongjie dying i mean fucking off forever and hsing ssu not letting him into his lifeXni doubt we will get that but at the very least they cannot end up together and that will be their crowning fucking achievement over the waste of time bullshit plot this was. Imagine actual conflict that wasnt so deeply fucking traumatic and, oh, again WHERE ARE THE PARENTS? They fucked up SO FUCKING BADLY. This gives people the wrong idea about how these things work. God he is truly a shitty character and his ass isnt even fat so wtf bitch why am i here!

#history 4: close to you #history 4 #a thot #god my anxiety was thru the roof turns out i needed to eat

[tvxqdbsk]

i agree with ur answer to that anon about how idols are expected to act a certain way, like they should “know” that this is what they signed up for when they started training so they cant complain. I HATE THAT. Like why does being an idol or a celeb in general come with the invasion of privacy why r we treating it as such a norm that when idols complain or show a bit of discomfort n displeasure with this kind of invasion of privacy its interpreted as ungrateful or rude. They signed up to sing and dance and perform,not to be harassed 24/7. i just hate the argument that it “comes with the job” and if u cant handle it then dont be an idol. the fact that they have to hide bad habits like normal bad habits bc they KNOW that ppl expect them to be perfect like that must be so exhausting. Its so stupid to me, absolute insanity, fucking crazy. like ppl cant have careers as a public figure without having fans that exhibit cult behaviour like??? y is it so hard to focus on the real problems of harassment and stalking like these r crimes! ok that idol smokes its a bad habit and sure u can be disappointed but like that should be the extent of it, why is it such a huge deal to the point that theyre afraid for their income. maybe if u all learn how to mind ur business u wouldnt be disappointed in what u discover , fuck around and find out!

i think a big problem is that some people fully buy into this perfect idol image that the company presents and don't realize their faves are just regular people with imperfects and flaws like anyone else. then there’s also this sense of entitlement they have to idols’ personal lives because they're public figures so apparently that means they don't have a right to privacy and ‘this is what they signed up for’ when really they were super young and wanted to follow their passion when they became trainees so no they didn't sign up for stalkers and invasion of privacy and constant harassment. also how can those types of fans justify their behavior??? how do they look at their actions and demands of idols without realizing its disgusting?? they must be totally shameless or have no sense of morals to act that way. not only that but they really don't see idols as people who make mistakes and aren't perfect and have bad habits. which is true of everybody. the reality is that idols are not their idealized personas and they arent objects for consumption. the music the concerts the merch the videos etc are all products that have been made for people to enjoy and consume and some fans mistake that for also meaning they own the idols and are entitled to information, as well as the ability to dictate what they are and arent okay with an idol doing with their personal life. and those insane fans are powerful enough for it to actually scare idols into behaving in a way to not upset fans for fear of losing their job. companies arent going to do anything about it because these are the fans that make the most money and normal fans can call them out but that wont stop them when there's already a well established culture of having a sense of entitlement and unfair expectations. it feels hopeless :(

#ask

[spirit-shroud]

i replayed kz again tonight and managed to beat it in 4 hrs instead of 11 !!! which is rly cool imo, i think i got a max of like 50 deaths or less for the full run ??? i was just playing regularly but usin the prism blade for the cool blood effects, not in speedrun mode for the counter, and i managed 2 drag my friend into hyperfixation hell with me :} but also i have some thoughts and opinions im not rly sure how to compile in a meaningful way, so here’s the like. pure brain-down-on-blog post version under the cut. if this gets auto-tagged into the real actual tag for this game im very sorry for my hubris im just. thinking emoji

so id like to start this with the final boss makes me SO sad :( like yeah she doesnt have much dialogue but idk she just makes me so sad. she’s so desperate and she Knows shes going to lose and im just like. no!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you’re so cool!!!!!!! Please Be My Friend We Can Work Together. I Know A Guy :c like usually final bosses are like weirdly emotional for me but she was just SO COOL and realizing like WAIT THIS BOSS OPERATES UNDER THE SAME RULES I DO was just like WOW even if as i kept dying (and i think i spent like... 3 hrs on the final boss alone lmao the first time, i killed her on my third attempt this run which was very cool of me) i finally realized that she IS pretty repetitive and got all her patterns n variables down super easy, but like, fighting another null who Should for all intents and purposes be just as absurd and powerful as i am, and eventually being able to down her effortlessly, and then the withdrawal affects of the chronos kicking in as well, and its just like. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

dont even get me STARTED on that ‘to be continued’ like yeah there’s a dlc comin but the game mentions repeatedly that its just the first act which has me like OKAY. SPECULATION TIME (what am i speculating on? literally no idea im not even rly at the speculation phase im still in the WOW COOL VIDEO GAME phase) 

and i rly like the dragon/fifteen but the first time i saw him i was just like. who’s this f*llmetal alchemist looking bitch ??? what’s he doin here?? go HOME and controlling him is AWFUL i hate the dragon tape so MUCH >:C but also he’s like. cool. i want to know more about him n his plot 2 take down Juncture n the government n whatever. 

but also i was listen 2 Full Confession bc it’s just. what the heart wants rn. i need to be sad and caffeinated in order to get into the Writing Zone rn and then i was THINKIN like my friend mentioned while we were playing the dragon tape that the song that plays is very similar to Full Confession (which i had sent him earlier while i was losing my mind over the final boss) and then i was like. Hm. these are very similar but have such wildly different moods -- Breath of the Serpent is much more like. ‘you’re going to be afraid of me’ while Full Confession is like ‘i’m afraid of you’ and i think that the different Vibes from these two soundtrack bits about important Null characters is just like. WOW and i wonder how a version of it that was purely Zero’s might be. would it be more triumphant? more flat? what desperation or emptiness is in there that could be drawn out by this melody??? i dont KNOW and i can’t write music unfortunately but im just like AAAAAAAAAA

i also rly wanna know what snow has going on ??? like. shes clearly important. she is a vital npc. but Why. she didnt even rly do anything except Show Up???

fuck V. all my homies hate V. the motorcycle fight was a lot of fun tho i rly liked that section even if my therapist was mad at me afterwards

also i think elizabeth/the little girl is rly cute and the fact zero was just like. ‘hm. well guess i have a daughter now’ so fast w/ her (at least, with the dialogue trees me n my pal kept going down) and im just. So Hoping we can rescue her in the dlc :( i miss her so much and im so like. worried abt that like pls give me back my daughter you dumbasses i cant even read ur dialogue without my brain being like ‘yeah these r just squiggly lines, boss. gl’ 

i also want to believe that the masked men arent real (bc idk, it’s just easier for me to process that they’re the result of chronos withdrawal) but the problem w/ that is like. they definitely kidnapped elizabeth, and i want so desperately to believe that elizabeth IS real n that zero genuinely wants to protect her (and by extension, the part of himself that is still human) 

ALSO THE PSYCHIATRIST i was just like. Okay. I Must Get A Good Grade In Therapy. n kept being nice n cooperative and helpful to this clown ass and then THAT ENDING ??? like i didnt even get the Bad Therapist Ending i was just like. fucka you! attacka you with a rock! (i do however want to try the therapist boss it sounds like a lot of fun) but i just. i hate him! he sucks! find a better therapist zero u rly need one im sorry for ur problems disorder :( like hes clearly a guy who just works for the government n wants 2 keep a leash on our man 

n the contradictions, hes like. yeah ur killing everyone related to chronos so it can no longer be produced ♥ but dw ur special we totally wont just withhold chronos from you as soon as u finish ur tasks dw about it ♥ and its like. Hm. I Dont Think Thats Right !!!! 

also i wanna learn more about what Juncture has going on??? what are they like. Doing besides poisoning water n making lighters ?????? it’s clearly a lot 

also the art for this game is just so GOOD,,, like. i didnt rly notice a lot of the backgrounds my first playthrough bc i was just losing my mind the whole time trying to solve each puzzle but the second playthrough im just like. AAAAA. and the soundtrack? effervescent. groundbreaking. perfect. So Good 

and the GAMEPLAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh my GOD i was SO vibing with it, the difficulty curve was kinda extreme imo but as soon as i started like. Getting It? and started looking at each room less like combat/fighting and more like a puzzle that needed to be solved it made it so much easier 2 get into the headphase of ‘okay how do i clear this’ and it was just like. YOOOOOOOO

and zero is just a lot of fun 2 play as. legitimately everything about him is just so ridiculous. his dialogue options? ridiculous. his design? absurd. the implications that hes like. 22 and just having the worst 10 days of his life? mood, buddy. this guy likes samurai movies and card games and mushroom pizza and has worn the same outfit every single day for who knows how long and hes also a war veteran, an emotionless serial killer and a drug addict. and hes 22 and 5′10. literally NOTHING about those traits make sense together but here he is, just Vibing. 

i love him so much. im going to make a self insert oc that’s just giving him a friend who knows how to cook n is just like ‘oh wow, that’s rough buddy’ when hes like ‘i only feel alive when i kill people’ and conveniently knows how 2 get bloodstains out of things bc i think he needs that kind of person in his life since his like. therapist is conspiring against him n he keeps having 2 kill his friends 

also, unfortunately, i want to get every achievement, which i feel like is going to become hld....2!! where i get all but 1 of them and am stuck at 96% for 2+ years >:T

#kc chirps #hello gamers i am vibrating! very vibrating. losing my marbles at this 420am on a thursday

[currently-shushing-birds]

I'm rewatching the early Sanders Sides episodes (let go from My True Identity to Losing motivation) so here are my thoughts with mild context

Logan used to be such a smiley boy :(((

Oh logan that's gay

Roman pops up, insults them he's all "hi roman :)))"

"And that's when the anxiety kicks in" but virgil..doesnt show up. It's so weird

Roman goes "I'll learn to love myself" and then DOESNT

I'm calling it.  That's Janus. Logan says he doesnt gave emotion and here he is being a SMILEY boi who is telling thomas what's good about him >:(

THAT'S- THAT'S ROMAN'S THEME WH-

Oh Patton...oh pat..

"YOU'RE A F A T H E R"

"I know it's got somethin' to do with storks!"

"Am I right tony?" "That's not my name"' "then w h a t i s i t"

A D U L T E R Y

"Please welcome my anxiety" "sup!"

What what a bitch. Like a mean girl. Regina who??

"Sorry kid" excuse but arent you the litteral child

*crosses legs like a gay icon*

WHERE DID THIS BITCH GO

I'm all good with our current virgil but goddamn he's like a villain and w o w I love Villians

"Hey there Princey ;)" jesus

Lily Singh is gorgeous and super cool but god that woman is an enigma

Such light eyeshadow

I have a headcanon that Virgil and Remus watch shitty reality TV together and I completely forgot about this-

*waves at bird*

"Anxiety can be a constant struggle" "that's right ;)"

YA NASTY

It devolved Thomas, I'm so sorry-

Leslie Odom Jr. is one of my favorite people

Ugh I'm so proud of Thomas

Logan- THIS ONE HAS A SONG!!

"Proper adultery"

Oh, this is when logan still liked YouTube I see

"NO" "hey!!!!"

Y'know the one John Mulaney bit where he's just saying "okay, okay" that's Thomas

L O G A N

When was Patton so mean-

"Ugh...I do not like you" and then the fandom declared they were in love

They all sound the same and it's weird. Later on they all have their own spots in Thomas' vocal range. Example: Virgil sings lower while Roman is a the highest part if Thomas' vocal range

The lip syncing is like- y'know what nevermind

Logan having fun singing: :0

"You sicken me!!" Damnn

It was his video >:(

I keep my closet open because I'm afraid of serial killers inside-

No one said prince but I love you so much-

I adore Roman's theme

*gay hand*

And this is also where we declared they were in love

*gay hand again*

Julie Andrews is a beautiful goddess

"Or dont eat fruit:))"

O H N O

I love Peter Pan-

That's what Janus did..lying and deceiving his way to my goddamn heart I love him

Princey is SALTY

Thomas doesn't age

And they're in love :)))

I watched this episode last night at 4 am :))

I love rent-

UGH ROMANNNNNN

"I love dISNEY"

Logan just became anxiety there

Just the "AHSJWJAEMTDESW" from Patton has me fucking rollibg

STORYTIME!!! *sits contently like a toddler*

Ugh I love Roman

I havent seen The Untimate Storytime but I wanna

Bizzardvark...Jake Paul...ew

Patton I love you

Gonna link my post right here because I love him so much

Logan is so excited-

EW NASTY

I love playing bubbly characters!! Join me Thomas!!

Aw Roman

Gay Disney Prince

AW VIRGE

damn Pat

Thomas is such a sweetheart I swear to god-

AWWW-

"I'm not you're son >:("

AWWWWWWWWW-

"Our little guy"

Your heart and your mind...yes they're in love

Patton s t o p-

*as Patton and Logan are bickering* ah..romance

We really are clowns

"I am not your son" you are though Thomas

Our biggest dilemma was "I kinda wanna learn more about myself" and now it's "IS IT B A D IF I KILL A MAN"

Onesie buddies

Is that ship art-

I miss the Sanders Sides intro

"I know big words too. Sssssaxaphone???"

GIRL

Is this the episode where Ligan speaks simlish

Thomas's acting is so good

IT IS THE SIMLISH EPISODE

Valerie...so pretty

"AYO ZIPIT TOO BLARP"

I do like bagels- also that tie in via the recent episode

Leave Valerie alone guys you're all gay-

He wrote that

Valerie just nods along

Oh look at that art

Oh Pat :(((

Dragon Witch: Fuck you Valerie

"MY SPLEEN"

Roman is bilingual and probably bisexual

You're upsetting him >:(

"I'm feeling all types of bad" BABY BOY-

"I wasn't trying to help" stfu

Awww

"IF I COULD GIVE YIU ALL BUTTERFLY KISSES-" *sobbing*

And they're in love

"I love you" *more crying*

Have..fun????

Does this imply Roman can hide a body

AHHHHHHH

They're. In. Love

OH I LOVE THIS EPISODE

all business strictly dress up seriousness

Thonas really said "Patton's my dad figure but God you guys are children"

He does makeup :))

Logan: he is ANXIOUS!!

Virgil: *blinks like he doesnt understand

*winks*

Smarrttt

*looking at Patton's hat*' kill the competition, sell the next edition. What a fine life-

"You're n o t welcome"

Patton be nice-

Logan thinking looks like that one meme where the lady has equations all around her..has someone drawn that

"Logic and I are playing dress up, anxiety is making us question our existence and I found a dollar" favorite fuckibg line every single time

EY NEWSIES!! RENT!!

God there's a lot of shipping content

Doo doo *giggle*

"My bad"

OOP

Patton is the character thar's smart but also a fucking idiot

"Is it because I have a dollar and you dont??"

Logannnnn

"You're dating this video"

Logan are you okay baby-

What the fuck kind of agreeing face was that

Pasta salad

Sir Sing A Lot

WOAHHH

I- LOGAN'S NAME REVEAL

FORGOT ABOUT THAT

A BITCH J U M P E D

I honestly dont know why I did this, I do it in other fandoms and no one is entertained but me- alright that's all

#thomas sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #sanders sides

[greeds]

fucking god..... throughout the entire show theyre all like “oh we arent exactly a family we just come and go as we please and we dont love each other” etc and like maybe the viewer would believe it bc domestic scenes/moments are sadly pretty sparse and they dont really show their affection much (im gonna definitely be more focused on it on my rewatch) but then ed ein and faye leave and its just jet and spike....... after 3 years of being this messy found family, theyre on their own again. the egg dinner scene that follows is so quiet and joyless compared to how it usually is with faye ed and ein... i come from a loud and rowdy family so i know that silence, the way the house feels empty when just one person is missing from the dinner table; the contrast in energy is heartbreaking. in the next episode jets like i see now why you hate kids and women bc ed and faye caused us sm trouble, but spike doesnt say anything to agree or disagree. theyre both trying and failing to cope with the loss of half the family in one day. spike calls faye like where the hell are u, hes basically expecting her to come back bc of course they always come back even when theyve been out for a while and faye is thrown by that bc she never once has felt like she belonged anywhere since waking up from cryosleep with no memory of her past. shes stubborn as hell so she tells spike to fuck off and yet she still finds herself back at the bebop in the end. she opens up and tells spike the ship and him and jet are the only thing she can return to now, bc its her home!!!!! its their home!!! and spike opens up too and he confesses to his dreamlike grieving state and how he literally has not moved on or healed like at all since faking his death all those years ago. it makes me want to cry how emotionally closed off this entire crew is. all that time spent together and for what?? even after they share their fear and their pain with each other, nothing changes. spike leaves faye and jet to grieve in separate rooms of the ship, choosing the stasis of his past over his family, and they dont try to stop him. why is it so hard for this crew to admit their love for each other!!! why!!!!!! how can you spend three years together, eat and fight together, and resist the natural healing process i just dont understand!!!!! they put all their energy into pretending they didnt care about each other bc they were so afraid of losing ppl they cared about again......

#cowboy bebop #LONG POST SORRY #I JUST HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS. #cb #mine

[gg-astrology]

As a fellow 'I eat out of nutella jars too' I would like to tell u HOW WHOLESOME YOUR BLOG IS uwu. Can I know what you think about my Aqua sun and libra moon? thank/love u bye

ksdjnfksn OOOF thank u so much!!! 💕💕💕 I finished that nutella jar btw, i snacked on it for like 3 hours a tiny bit at a time (it was mostly empty anyways so i was scrapping off the sides skdfndk) 💕

[Below Cut: Aquarius Sun - Libra Moon ♎️ ]

I say this a lot for decans, but these people are one of the most well-balanced one out of their group of friends, internally and externally

Like yeah they have their own Shit too, but in terms of Dealing with their actual problems– people really admire them for it (bc most other people are like, weird with ‘woe is me’ kind of thing or not realizing themselves)

They rarely open up to others surprisingly, tend to have a few good close friends who they do (maybe 1-2 that they trust enough to tell their problems to)

Most of the time they just— if people are concerned about their personal/private shit they kind of just shrugs it off like ‘its cool, well not cool but you know its ok– i’ll deal with it’

Doesn’t want to get messy, for some reason they think venting is being Messy

It’s mostly because ‘venting’ implies letting out feelings that doesn’t do anything productive/go nowhere, like yeah it helps others who needs to do it to move on (mostly their fire sign friends). They understand that, so that’s why they’re there for them (with a tissue and calm soulful eyes to be the ‘stability’ in all this). But when it comes to themselves? It’s like they think they won’t gain anything out of venting their frustration bc ‘emotions arent supposed to work that way’ (if it’s not productive)

Thus why they find themselves being the person other people go to to vent to. Because they’re like ‘shrug, this is taking nothing from me im just here to be support’ they might look to saying yes alright to others. 

People might used to think of them as push-overs, but they’re not. It’s because they know they can offer tolerance, acceptance, understanding and support for others. Coupled with gentle reprimanding/encouragement, their advice are productive. But they do so gently like ‘you know what I mean right? I think it’s both of your problem, not just one of you is wrong. This is your responsibility, not mine.’ 

Aquarius is ruled by Saturn after all, they have a keen eye on their friends. Often pulling them in with a quick ‘do you need help? are you ok?’ offering it privately. If the friend doesn’t want to expose their problems in public, they leave it alone (bc they respect that). If their friend bursts out crying, they reel them in and tell the public that they’re ‘taking them away for a bit to calm down and see what the problem is’

They have tact tho like, they understand personal problem is a private thing. They aren’t going to come back and tell the rest of the world what the problem is because they themselves is a rather private person despite being a public personality. They aren’t of the mindset that sharing the problem with the friend-group/majority is going to help the person in question, unless it’s getting really serious/dire and they really do need outside intervention.    

See, beneath all the romanticism and ‘sigh i wish things like that happen to me’ — they have so much experience with helping others that they may tend to forget about themselves. They forget to delve deeper into their subconscious and the lessons they’ve emotionally picked up for others.

This leads them to maybe  subconsciously denying certain emotions they may also feel, certain things become catalogued as ‘messy’ without them realizing it. They think they don’t have/need to go to others for their problems, mostly because they’re used to being the one people go to for help.

If they lose their ‘stability’ then that would affect the group’s dynamic right? What if others who has proved to be ‘less stable’ than them started breaking down too? The overall mayhem and consciousness of the group emotionality/dynamic is what stops them from reaching out to people or letting others help them. They’re afraid to ‘break’ the type-cast of their strong emotional character (fixed sign remember) and thus they tend to underestimate their own emotional needs (’its fine i’ll deal with it)

Some may even have an aversive view to letting themselves show/go through their actual emotions because of this. Learning how to give equal emotionality in their relationships will be important to them, I know they might not like getting ‘vulnerable’ in front of people– but it will help them drastically with their own progression/development. 

Aqua/Libra people (who are still youngings) might even think crying is messy. But this depends on them honestly. The thing is, they might be afraid to show old friends (who they haven’t seen in a while) that they’ve grown and develop, and thus being quite a passive character or trying to reach back into who they were before in order to connect with them (which they will immediately regret later)

These people are optimistic tho, like they have a general positivity about them that they exude consciously. They’re one of those people who’ve probably read ‘the secret’ book by Rhonda Burne back in the days ( a self-help book, actually they read a lot of self-help books) 

They believe in the Law of Attraction– that if they exude positivity, then positivity will come back to them.

This is a teaching they demonstrate to their friends, those who may be feeling down, they do it to help others as well as themselves. They try to remain positive and have a positive influence with people– but in this case, that’s why they don’t expose themselves to others a lot of the time.

The people they open up to though, are people who are quite chill and personal. Like they’re as much of an individual as them, maybe kind of a trail blazer/admirable to them. They understand them, so they trust them to give good solid advice.

Most of the time, it’s understanding and practical answers. Like how they give to other people, these people become their close friends and ones they keep for life– they trust them and depend on them. 

Love their friends to bist, I know this is like cheesy BUT its in the WAY they love/show their love for their friend that’s really the 👌 of Aqua/Libra

Did you know they have sparkly eyes when they are happy/supportive of people? Sometimes it’s like, teasing– soft and gushy (and if you tell them this they’ll try to ‘cure’ it somehow sdknf)

It’s their facial expression that really does people in, they also tend to use like a calming voice for others. Not that they do it consciously, their calming voice is usually panic ridden for stressful situation (exerted consciously) but their normal voice is calming itself is what I mean.

Another thing is, ahh they may be attracted to those who are more ‘active’ – because they have such a strong sense of perception and inner peace. Those who are abit more cardinal (Aries/Capricorn/Cancer) or those with stress tensions (squares) tends to attract them towards those people. 

That’s it for now!! 💕💕 This is quite long but I hope it’s good for you!! ;; 💕💕💕💕 Thank u for dropping by and being so sweet to me aaaah 💕💕💕

#aquarius sun #libra moon #aquarius-libra #anon #asks