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Thank you, Rebecca Sugar.
Ugh…I dont want to miss you. It’s Friday, its weird not having you here. I know I just saw you but I like waking up with u next to me. I need to find something to keep my mind busy. I wish you missed me too. I’m afraid this is gonna last longer than I want.
someday i will be somebody, you’ll see. you’ll see.
Alright so I think I gotta tiny crush on a friend and I feel like a
Fanbase: Cat Noir and Miraculous Ladybug should be together
So I’m going through all the feels due to the pandemic obviously, but also other life stresses. In January I was let go from my job and that end of April my lease is up on my apartment. Finding a job an apartment has already been difficult but trying to do both during a fucking pandemic, is to say the least, a lot. I have family back up if I can’t find an apartment but it wouldn’t be great and my unemployment will run out in a few months. I really don’t know what to do at this point. I’m looking at jobs and apartments but it’s hard to focus on doing that when I swear that I hear an ambulance every 5-10 minutes. I also happen to live near a Corona hospital, so that’s stressful as well. Me and my partner went to the 7-11 2 blocks from our apartment tonight to get a few things and it felt like I ran a marathon and was also in combat. I don’t know what’s gonna happen when we need to go to the actual grocery store. My partner also happens to be asthmatic so I really don’t know what would happen if they got corona. Also neither of us have health insurance. I’ve been trying to keep busy but there’s only so much keeping busy I can do.
Someone of facebook posted a status along the lines of “Oh you’re only bored if you let yourself be bored.Blah blah blah”. While I get that to a certain extent, there’s a big difference between figuring out to fill your free time and being confined to your house.
I’m just feeling all the feels and had to get it out. Hope all you babes are staying safe and healthy. We will get through this, but damn some days are harder than others.
Quarantine feels brought to by Lily, Finn, & Chuck.
The world pandemic was not enough to think daily, worry and feel sad about… nope.
On a more little scale, today was the end of Steven Universe franchise ( for animation point of view), and it probably seems a stupid comparison but… this show was something else. Like Undertale, for me, has touched feelings that cartoons or video games aimed ‘for kids’, should not reach… and here I’m, moved to tears by not just the gorgeous animation, not just the beautiful storytelling and overarching full story of the show… fully realizing i feel like shit because…
I’m a Steven.
For as long as I can remember, I always had to look out for the people in my emotional surroundings ( friends and family), I always have felt the urge to help them, listen to them, be there when everything was going bad and many ‘other friends’ suddenly just vanish or start to reel in from the hard part of being ‘friend’. The bad part, the one in which you have to be sincere and sometimes ‘against’ who you love, because you want them to get away from a dangerous decision or if they are risking to get hurt badly… so you become a villain for ‘not supporting unconditionally’.
I’ve lost, basically all my friends like this, (even if some people in the last 10 years HAVE contact me again to tell me I was right, that did not saw back our relationship in any shape or form… just a pebble in their shoes their pride probably wanted to get rid of, like to ‘settle scores’…)
And the ones I didn’t had a fight with, have seen me spiraling down… but just take distances in time.
So, basically, I’m living on the code words ‘I’m fine’ while I know that ‘I am my monster’… but that’s it.
There will be no one to force me out the truth, and make me say out loud that: I’m NOT fine.
That I feel like a constant failure, that everything I do it’s always somehow wrong or not good enough, that my art sucks and I should just drop everything and find a ‘normal job’, like normal people my age do…
… and in few months even SUPERNATURAL will be over! Damn, what a year to forget.
Just for a couple of my favorite show’s end.
kinda want to grab your face and kiss ya, idk tho
that adhd feel when your main hyperfixation is cancelled but everything else is also cancelled so you’re just sitting at home without even your hyperfixation that you’ve been looking forward to for months to focus on
That ADHD feel when you’ve been taking your meds for a few months now and they’re finally working and for the first time in your life you can just sit still in class and pay attention to what the professor’s saying and take coherent notes(!!!!!!) and drive without the fear of crashing because you just can’t concentrate and listen when others are speaking to you and talk about something without changing the subject every 0.5 seconds and watch movies/tv shows without having to go back and rewatch clips and many many many more things and you’re finally thriving for once and you realize just how easy it has been for everyone else all this time……
and you stop hating yourself as much :’)
kinda in my feels today, if you follow me shoot me some sad, RnB, Lo Fi, in my feels type of music
I FEEL LIKE CRYING
IT HIT ME SO HARD IN THE FEELS
THIS IS THE 2ND TIME A CARTOON FINALE HAS KILLED MY EMOTIONS-
*glances at gravity falls for being number 1 but for some reason suf’s finale hit harder*
IM HAPPY AND SAD
IM CRYING INTERNALLY AND IT HURTS PLEASE HELP
MY STOMACH HURTS NOW FROM ALL THE EMOTIONS S T U C K
BUT STEVEN ACTUALLY CORRUPTED
EVERYONE WAS RIGHT
THE THEORY BECAME TRUE
AND THE THINGS THAT SCARED ME BEFORE HE CORRUPTED WAS: “STEVEN’S HERE TO H E L P”, THE MUSIC STARTING TO GET F U N K Y WHEN HE TALKED ABOUT LITERALLY TRYING TO SHATTER WHITE DIAMOND AND THEN ADMITS THAT HE SHATTERED JASPER AND SAYS HE CAN ‘FIX ANYTHING’, AND THEN THE SPIKES SHOOTING OUT OF HIS BACK AFTER HE SAYS HE’S A FRAUD AND A MONSTER
AND SPINEL AND WHITE DIAMOND THINKING IT WAS BOTH OF THEIR FAULT FOR STEVEN CORRUPTING
MY POOR HEART CAN’T HANDLE THIS
BUT SERIOUSLY I STARTED SHAKING WHEN I SAW THE SPIKES SHOOT OUT OF STEVEN’S BACK, I LITERALLY SCREAMED: “HE’S CORRUPTING!!!” WHEN THAT HAPPENED AND MY FAMILY GAVE ME THIS WEIRD LOOK
BUT STILL OH MY GOD
I WASN’T EXPECTING THAT YET I WAS AT THE SAME TIME
THAT WAS AN EMOTIONAL RIDE
but… goodbye steven universe :(
I’m gonna go try and cry now.
La Roux fans,
Real talk-I don’t know if I’m the only one who feels it, but for me the third album makes me feel the way the first one did emotionally. I’m not sure why, the music is totally different, but it gives me the same sense of originality and excitement upon listening in the way the second one didn’t. Don’t get me wrong, I loved Trouble in Paradise, but it was missing something for me that I couldn’t put my finger on until I heard Supervision. I’m so excited for more and that Elly has full creative control because nothing else makes me feel like her music does.