#<- i need everyone to see this and understand. like do you understand me. its way more important for arti | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

youreverydayfangirl · 2 days

Text

afterglow

pairing: charles leclerc x australian! reader

summary: y/n made a rash decision, or in which charles fights for his girl

warning: age gap relationship, hate, teeniest angst to fluff

a/n: pt 3 guyss

find pt 1 here and pt 2 here!!!

yourusername has posted

liked by charlesleclerc, francisca.cgomes and 8, 987, 374 others

yourusername WONDERLAND TOUR is officially a wrap guysss

francisca.cgomes my bestie is so talented and gorgeous

→ yourusername francisca.cgomes STOP I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

→ yourusername I CANT WAIT TO SEE YOU AGAIN

→ user1 your honor i love them

charlesleclerc so proud of you

→ yourusername thank you charles

→ user2 PARENTS

oliviarodrigo NEW MUSIC WHEN

→ yourusername oliviarodrigo SSHH

→ user2 WHAT DO YOU KNOW

user2 and people said she was a gold digger when she already has MILLIONS

user3 i miss her and charles so much

user4 charles in the likes i see 👀

user5 he still wants her so bad omg

user5 and people said she was the obsessed one

user6 CHARLES COMMENT OMG

user7 no cause she started single, they started dating, got engaged and broke up all during this tour

→ user8 STOPPP

yourusername has posted

liked by charlesleclerc, francisca.cgomes and 6, 798 365 others

yourusername girls trip w my fav w @ francisca.cgomes

tagged: francisca.cgomes

francisca.cgomes tea was spily not only metaphorically but literally

→ yourusername francisca.cgomes STOPPP YOU SAID YOU WOULDNT TELL

→ francisca.cgomes i lied

→ yourusername traitor

→ francisca.cgomes hehe

→ user1 you should pay for her therapy francisca.cgomes

liked by creator

→ user2 girl what tea 👀☕

→ francisca.cgomes steaming hot tea

→ yourusername francisca.cgomes SHUT UP

charlesleclerc gorgeous

→ user3 get me a man that pines for me the way charles does for y/n

→ user4 word its been months

yourusername has posted

liked by charlesleclerc, pierregasly and 9, 287, 637 others

yourusername life recently

tagged: francisca.gomes, lilymhe, oliviarodrigo

francisca.cgomes shoulde put the photo in where you stacked it

→ yourusername francisca.cgomes wow i see how it is

lilymhe i missed you on the grid

→ yourusername ME TOOO

oliviarodrigo hehehe im excited

→ yourusername same omg

→ user1 WHAT IS IT TELL MEEEE

charlesleclerc the most beautiful girl ever

pierregasly i heard that charlesleclerc saved 55 orphans from a burning building

landonorris charlesleclerc bought everyone on the grid a free round

carlossainz55 charlesleclerc let me drive his new car.

maxverstappen1 charlesleclerc saved my cat from a tree the other day

lewishamilton charlesleclerc babysits roscoe all the time for me

oscarpiastri charlesleclerc payed for my tuition. thanks dad.

loganseargant charlesleclerc saved me from a cricket

alexalbon charlesleclerc saved my dog the other day. hes a good man savannah.

georgerussell ohhhhh

→ carmenmmundt 🤦‍♀️

georgerussell charlesleclerc bought me a new ferrari

user2 what is going on in the house of commons

yourusername has posted two stories

caption 1 a bit heavy

caption 2 feeling pretty spoilt

liked by charlesleclerc, landonorris and 654, 786 others

landonorris maybe he does have game

pierregasly that works aswell ig

charlesleclerc mon amor

yourusername i love you so much you don't even understand

charlesleclerc no one will ever even begin to understand how much i love you

charlesleclerc i need you more than oxygen

yourusername has posted one story

caption 1: if you know you know

liked by charlesleclerc, francisca.cgomes and 567, 897 others

charlesleclerc i can't wait to see you today

yourusername me to my love

francisca.cgomes your stunning omfg

yourusername STOPP ITT

yourusername has posted

liked by charlesleclerc, francisca.cgomes and 15, 678, 892 others

yourusername i heard he saved 55 orphans from a burning building

tagged: charlesleclerc

pierregasly charlesleclerc i told you it would work

→ charlesleclerc it didnt

→ pierregasly sure it didn't

charlesleclerc my eternal sunshine

→ yourusername i love you so much stop it

yourusername has posted

liked by charlesleclerc, oliviarodrigo and 20, 485, 383 others

yourusername i'm excited to annouce that my third album afterglow comes out next thursday guysss. this album was along time coming and it has been pieced together in a story for you guys to fully understed my perspective over the past two years. from heartbreak, to peace, to understanding what true love feels like. the title track 'afterglow' will feature oliviarodrigo much love you guys.

yourusername pinned

the tracklist:

you're losing me, this is me trying, i hate it here, illicit affairs, the prophecy, loml, the black dog, bye, guilty as sin?, begin again, so highschool, dancing with our hands tied, so american, king of my heart, you are in love, call it what you want, daylight, but daddy i love him, afterglow ft olivia rodrigo, paper rings, lover, timeless, the manuscript

charlesleclerc pov you've already heard the songs

→ youusername pov you should shut up

francisca.cgomes so excited

liked by creator

oliviarodrigo it was an amazing experience getting to collab with you

liked by creator

_______________

a/n: happy ending!!! also i will probably end up doing a pt4 at some point with wedding fluff.

#formula 1 #charles leclerc #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc fic #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fluff

472 notes · View notes

lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 3 days

Note

Hii not sure if your requests are open or not- so ignore this if they’re closed! <3

Can I request some Obey Me! Headcanons?

So reader is the 8th sister of the brothers. So she’s the youngest.

Just some general headcanons of her relationships w the brothers

( And some of the side characters if it’s not too much trouble :>)

Thanks <33

I've already done something like that but I love the concept so I'm just going to build that 🖤🖤🖤🖤

Youngest Sibling Reader Headcannons | Yandere Obey Me

Lucifer

Before I said he was the worst one and I mean it

He’s an amalgamation of someone who understands you but undermines you at every moment

Because he understands, he does listen

He just doesn’t hold your opinions on the same level as his own

But worse

Of course his brother’s constant chatter about aimless things isn’t on his level

But every now and then he’ll enjoy hanging out with them

But not you

Never you

“Ah so you do pay attention to the political atmosphere. Good job.”

“I don’t expect you to know but I’ll tell you anyways.”

It’s degrading

It’s disrespectful

And he does not care

You can cry and yell all you like

it’ll just sound like a tantrum to him

So he’ll treat like one

“If you can’t behave, I’ll have to send you to the attic.”

Leviathan

As previously stated is apart of the group that just misinterprets everything you say

It’s hard to say if it’s delusion or denial

Because sometimes he’ll slip up

You’ll catch him crying or a single mumble in his late night rambles

“Aw my baby is so grown up…I just can’t believe it anymore.”

If you try to address it he’ll pat your head and ruffle your hair (if you have any)

Before telling you it’s nothing for the baby to worry about anyway

It’s incredibly annoying

When he writes off your achievements in gaming as button mashing

Or saying your just a genius so you’d get on his level eventually

Any protests or ‘grown-up’ conversations are often just outright ignore

Now doing things outside of the ‘baby’ image he has of you mostly has him ignoring that too

Unless you come back hurt or specifically crying for his help

He will actually start flooding places and going into an absolute rampage

He won’t listen to you about calming down

Its going to take all the brothers to de-aggro their brother to save everyone from drowning

“Sorry guys I just want to make sure our baby sib is doing okay!”

Asmodeus

Also a part of that ‘doesn’t listen to you’ crew

Accept while he might actually here you his brain literally just never let’s him hear your real voice

“Can you please stop trying to rearrange my closet?! It’s weird to find you digging through my stuff–”

“Okay okay no need to cry what’s the problem baby sib? C’mon you can use your words! Tell big bro Asmo what’s the matter?”

It’s almost a concern when he does it in front of your other brothers

Especially the ones you can hold an actual conversation

“Hey (Y/n) can you pass the salt and the salad.”

“Sure, man.”

“Hey Hey! Why are you bothering (Y/n), they’re trying to focus on eating? Not to mention your being such a meanie, trying to make them reach with their tiny arms!”

“(Y/n) is sitting closer to me than you…”

“So? How do you expect them to know good manners if you don’t show them! Here I’ll show you how! Watch me baby (Y/n)!”

He honestly doesn’t compute when you’re getting older

He’ll celebrate birthdays, milestones, awards

But he doesn’t believe you are growing and can’t see it either

Reprimanding you when you went out with your own car

“I’m all for playing with your toys, but you have to have a chaperone. Okay?”

That being said any advances from others are met with extreme animosity

“Not my little (Y/n)! Try that with someone else’s little baby!”

#yandere x reader #yandere x you #lovelyyandereaddictionpoint #yanderexrea #yanderes #yandere #yandere obey me #yandere platonic #yandere platonic obey me x reader #yandere platonic obey me lucifer #yandere platonic obey me asmodeus #yandere platonic obey me leviathan #yandere obey me x reader #yandere obey me asmodeus

97 notes · View notes

c-pidcup · 1 day

Text

➮ flames of discord ; K. BAKUGOU

wc ; 472 / tw ; fighting and swearing

a/n ; lot’s && lot’s of dialogue in this… i don’t really write conflict quite often but !!!!! i was trying to write everyday but its looking like every couple days. hope u enjoy !!

────────────────────────

there sun dipped low in the sky, casting long shadows across the campus training ground as katsuki and y/n stood facing each other, their voices sharp with frustration, echoing against the empty buildings.

"you’re always with him! do you even care how that makes me feel?" katsuki's words were like sparks igniting a powder keg, his fiery gaze locked on y/n’s.

y/n’s eyes flashed with irritation. "he’s just a friend, katsuki. i’ve told you that eighty times. why are you being so jealous?"

"jealous? i'm not jealous. i just can't stand seeing you with him all the damn time!" katsuki's temper flared, his fists clenched at his sides, palms crackling with energy.

y/n crossed her arms, glaring back at him. "maybe if you weren't so possessive, i wouldn't need to spend time with someone else!"

"me, possessive? you’re the one who's always hanging off of him!" katsuki's voice rose, the frustration boiling over, his temper like a wildfire spreading rapidly.

y/n took a step forward, her voice icy. "maybe i wouldn't need to if you actually showed me some attention once in a while.”

katsuki’s eyes widened in shock, his anger faltering for a moment before flaring back stronger than before. "what the hell are you talking about? i'm always there for you."

y/n shook her head, their tone laced with bitterness. "physically, maybe, but emotionally? you're never there. you push everyone away with that damn attitude of yours!”

his chest heaved with pent-up emotion, his hands trembling with frustration. he shook his head. "you don't know what you're talking about, y/n. you have no idea what it's like for me.”

“then tell me, god damn it!” she cried, stepping forward once more.

katsuki opened his mouth to respond, but no words came out. he stood there, his jaw clenched, struggling to articulate the whirlwind of emotions raging inside him, his fiery exterior masking the turmoil within.

y/n’s gaze softened, voice gentle. "i know you're hurting, kats. but you can't keep pushing me— pushing everyone— away every time things get tough."

his shoulders slumped, the fight draining from him as he looked at y/n, his eyes filled with a mixture of regret and longing. "i... i don't know how to do this, y/n. i don't know how to be... vulnerable.”

y/n reached out to touch his arm, her touch gentle. "you don't have to figure it out all at once. just know that i'm here for you. always."

katsuki's gaze softened, a flicker of hope stirring within him as he looked at y/n. "i'm… sorry, y/n. i... i'll try to do better."

y/n offered him a small smile, her eyes filled with understanding. "i know you will, kats. And i’ll be here every step of the way."

────────────────────────

#bnha #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero academia #katsuki bakugou #bakugou katsuki #kaachan #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou katuski x reader #kaachan x reader #katsuki bakugo mha #bnha bakugo katsuki #mha bakugou #bnha bakugou

41 notes · View notes

dazymaisy · 2 days

Note

Do you think Ginny has her own " chest monster" version ? Just like Harry? We always talk about Harry's jealousy moments but Ginny also has her own when it comes to Harry

“Ginny! You’re drooling,” Demelza giggled.

She felt her fingers tighten around her broom and tore her eyes away from Harry, who was commandeering a clumsy group of first years. “I am not,” she said brusquely, “just scouting his body language, is all.”

“He’s not bad looking,” Dee qualified. “You like his captain’s badge, do you?”

“Shut up,” she groaned.

“He’s bound to pick you,” said Dee. “He practically lives with you, doesn’t he?”

“I don’t wan t him to put me on the team because he’s friends with my brother,” said Ginny. “I want him to put me on the team because I’m bloody good at quidditch.”

Dee patted her knee. “That’s very noble of you, Gin.”

Ginny huffed. A second group had taken to the pitch – a gaggle of third and fourth year girls, giggling and falling over themselves. Ginny spotted Romilda Vane immediately.

“Oh, god,” she moaned.

“What?” said Dee.

“It’s Romilda,” she said coldly. Romilda was not well-liked amongst Ginny’s dorm mates. They often heard her through the floorboards, in the fourth-year dormitory below – giggling loudly at all hours of the night. “No way she can fly a broom.”

Harry had his back to her – Ginny couldn’t see his face, but she could see the way Romilda looked at him, eyes wide and falsely bashful. Her hair wasn’t even tied back. It cascaded in long, dark curls down her back.

“She needs to put her hair up,” Ginny muttered, “that’s a hazard.”

Dee blinked. Their grudge against Romilda had always been quiet, a sort of unspoken undercurrent – Ginny had never been so outwardly venomous.

It took her a moment to understand. When it clicked, she crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her eyes. “Yeah, who does she think she is?” said Dee.

“Harry, I’m so sorry –” Romilda’s high-pitched voice carried across the pitch, and Ginny cringed – “could you help me mount the broom?”

Ginny let out a disbelieving huff. Something deep inside her chest threatened to rear its ugly head. “Oh, that bitch.”

Beside her, Dee dissolved into poorly concealed laughter.

Harry refused to help Romilda mount her broom. “It’s expected you know the basics of flying before you come to a try out,” she heard him say.

Romilda and the other girls did not last long. They just as soon got their brooms off the ground as they collapsed into a squealing heap. Harry told them to get off the pitch – the girls obeyed, clambering up into the stands to watch the rest of try outs.

“He’s very authoritative,” Ginny observed. Dee smirked at her.

And really, she needn’t have worried about her own try out – she easily out flew the rest of the contenders, and sank seventeen goals before Harry blew his whistle.

The chasers landed in a semi-circle around him, chests heaving as he announced his decision. Ginny hardly felt winded.

“Alright. Er – you all did very well –” Harry met her eyes for a split second before lowering his head. “But obviously I can only choose three...”

Ginny felt her heart sink. Was this his indirect way of letting her off easy?

“Katie Bell – we’ll keep you, obviously.” Ginny saw Katie grin with pride. She felt a surge of dislike toward her, though she couldn’t identify the source – Katie had never been anything but kind to her. “And next… Demelza Robins.”

Dee let out an involuntary squeal of excitement, and squeezed Ginny’s hand. It was with great effort that Ginny returned the gesture. If Dee made the team and she didn’t, she’d have to seriously consider dropping out.

Harry was very pointedly avoiding looking at her. Ginny’s heart sank, she thought she might throw up right here on the pitch – she hadn’t made it.

Her disappointment was swiftly replaced with anger. How dare Harry not choose her? She’d filled in for him all last year – proven herself, again and again –

“And, er, Ginny Weasley,” said Harry.

Everyone else let out soft sighs of displeasure. Ginny felt as though she might faint. “But like I said, you all did quite well, there’s always next year…”

“Yeah, right,” said a girl Ginny recognized as one of the seventh years. She crossed her arms and stormed off toward the changing rooms.

Harry watched her go, then clapped his hands together. “Good work today, everyone. Katie, Demelza, Ginny – I’ll see you all at practice. I’ve got to go find some beaters, now.”

Dee grinned at her sideways.

Ginny’s eyes were locked on Harry. He was turning to leave, to head back toward the group of potential beaters. He caught her eyes for a fleeting moment, just long enough to give her a small smile.

Something warm spread down to Ginny’s toes. She smiled back.

#ginny's chest monster #ginny and demelza are bffs!#tfw he's authoratative?#ginny weasley #harry potter #hinny fanfic #hinny #hinny fluff #quidditch #demelza robins #romilda vane

34 notes · View notes

bubbles-for-all-of-us · 8 hours

Note

Hello friend I was wondering if I could request a fourth wing x reader fic with xaden? Maybe where instead of Violet being tortured by varrish its reader? And maybe we see a bit from xadens pov?

Hurts like hell

The pain was like no other. The concept of time had slipped away a long time ago. Your body was sore and stiff. Nor could you distinguish if it was the sound of your blood dripping on the floor or the condensation of the cellar walls. “This could be so much easier, wing leader”, Varrish's venomous voice fills your senses and suddenly you wish you hadn’t blinked. Hadn’t made him aware of your consciousness. “What do you know about the rebellion, girl?”, he takes fistfuls of your hair, yanking your head back. Your angry eyes glare up at him, “Eat. My. Shit”, you hiss through gritted teeth as the back of his hand slams into your cheek. The rings he’s wearing crack the scabbed-up cuts all over again.

And it’s as if he feels it. Every blow. Every cut. Every scream. Xaden had lost the amount of time he had vomited since they had taken you. Or more since you had saved Bodhi’s and Garrick's asses and was taken instead of them. Had he beaten both of them up for it? Yes. And he planned on repeating it once you were back in his arms.

“There’s nowhere else they could be keeping her”, Imogen says, tapping her finger on the map. Everyone had been looking for you for three days now. “Unless he’s usually magic he shouldn’t”, Bodhi adds, making Xaden let out a growl. It was driving him mad knowing that you were taking a beating for his slip-up. They weren’t being careful enough. They weren’t thinking about the consequences when they smuggled such a big load of weapons out. “Tonight. There’s an upper-hand meeting at seven that leech of a man should be there”, he grunts, his shadows drowning his hands in the darkness. “Imogen you will make sure he stays there for as long as possible”, and for the first time, she only nods, because she too can feel that Xaden is on his last straw. “You two will come with me. Fuck knows what they have going on down there”, running a hand through his hair, Xaden watches as both Bodhi and Garrick nod. Hold on, he pleads, just for a bit longer. Because he would kill them all. Burn this whole academy down if you were… and that’s enough to make him go ridge once more. He couldn’t let himself think about it.

His heart is beating so fast and so loudly that he doesn’t even hear his footsteps as they navigate the dark corridors of the dungeons. Checking every nook and cranny. Every room. Every floorboard. Until the metal gates leading to the back cellar catch Xaden’s eyes, and the way his shadows rush to it in a frenzy. His legs step forward before he even realizes it. Breathe hitching in his throat.

“Y/n”, he mutters rushing forward. His hands are shaking so much that he can barely push the hair away from your face, let alone look for the pulse. Face. Barely recognizable face. So cut up and bruised. Drowned in angry purples and blacks. “There’s a pulse”, Xaden’s head snapped to the side, he didn’t even realize that Garrick had followed him in here. “Faint but there”, he clasped Xaden’s shoulder, “But we need to get her out of here”.

And he tries, tries so hard to get the ropes of your wrists but it’s as if his own body is going into an overdrive. “Bodhi, get Xaden out of here”, Garrick orders, freeing your legs, reaching to press his fingers to your neck once more. “No”, Xaden argues, pulling at your hand, “Baby, you need to open your eyes”, he mutters looking at you, “Tell me that you hear me”. But there’s nothing. Just your limp body. Drowning in blood and filth. A firm palm presses against the back of his neck and his head is turned away from you.

“We are getting her out. Do you understand?”, Garrick’s firm words slip past the haze. “You will go with Bodhi because you can’t help out anymore and I will carry her and keep her safe”, and it’s no longer a question. It’s a statement. An order. One that Xaden follows. With Bodhi reassuring with the whole way. Catching one last look at you. Of Garrick carefully scooping you up as he mumbles, “Come on, girly, we need you here. Don’t you give up yet”.

Xaden doesn’t move from your side after Brennon meds your wounds. The Rioroso house was the only place they could think of that was safe for you. But even here his mind doesn’t ease up. It’s been a week and you haven’t shown any signs of waking up. So just like any other night when he came to visit you, he’s carefully running the healing balm into the cuts on your face and arms. Needing to know that he’s doing something. Helping in some way.

And it’s the pain sigh that leaves your lips when his fingers brush over the cut on your temple that has his stalling. “Baby”, he breathes, gaze now fully fixed on your face. His lips brush over your knuckles, “Please, open your eyes. I need to…”, and it’s as if his words coxed you out of your slumber as you blink rapidly. Scared eyes scanned the place.

Xaden leans closer, carefully bringing his fingers through your hair. Trying to soothe you with the feeling of him. “Xaden”, his name on your lips is enough to finally make him crack. He lowers his head onto your shoulder as ugly sobs echo through the room. He knows that he should be strong. To be calmer and colder but he was convinced that he was never gonna hear the sound of your voice ever again. “I’m here, my little fighter”, he sniffles, looking back up at you, “l will never let you hurt like that ever again”.

#xaden riorson #xaden riorson x reader #xaden riorson x you #xaden riorson imagine #xaden x reader #xaden imagine #xaden fourth wing imagine #xaden fourth wing x reader #fourth wing imagine #fourth wing x reader #iron flame imagine #iron flame x reader

23 notes · View notes

042502 · 6 hours

Text

☆༉ — CHRIS STURNIOLO. The Unwritten Rule.

about. Everyone knows the rule, don't fall in love with your best friend's boyfriend.

author's note. This is the chapter 7, I hope it sounds interesting to you. My first language is not English. masterlis!

I started to relax a little after working for a while. Because Anna doesn't care about assignments when it's something she wants to do, like the individual investigative report we were assigned as part of the grade. He gives everything of himself, even more.

In eighth grade, she did an awesome interactive project about Broadway. He wrote about actors and actresses who were good in their day, and used their stories in a report, almost a book due to its length, about what Broadway represents for those who were part of the works that made it important.

It was so good that our English teacher wanted to talk to Anna's mom to try to publish it, but Anna's mom is always busy, and at the end-of-term ceremony she had to leave early, even before Anna received her award.

"Here," she says, pushing aside the book she was holding. "Now I know exactly what the proposal will be for my project - Broadway's fight to keep the ever-growing members of the media on edge.”

"Wow," I say, and she smiles.

"I know! Great, right?"

"Too much.”

She stretches and leans toward Chris. "What are you doing?"

"I don't know yet," he confesses. "Maybe something about how artists practice in a society where funds are harder to find, and how there are no real stars in the field anymore. At least not the ones everyone hears.”

"Because there is no money in them, just like you said," he remarked. "It's easy to be famous for just being someone, and that's what usually pays. Or at least it gives you something." Now his eyes are on me. “What are you doing?”

I shrug and Anna nudges my leg with her foot, smiling. "You already know that," she frowned, confused. "shoes, of course. Your obsession, which is completely strange" there was silence until she spoke again which is great.

"I don't think it's strange" Chris didn't seem to share Anna's thought. "I've never been to as many Broadway shows as how many, fifty? But I'm not saying you're obsessed."

"That's different," Anna babbles, "Why are you so mean? Ada, aren't you being mean to me?"

I know what I'm supposed to say, “yes” and then Anna will say “thank you” pretending to be sad and then she'll flirt with Chris and throw herself at him and... Why does Anna have to make me feel so bad sometimes?

"Good, now you're both being mean to me" he crossed his arms, pouting his lips pretending to be sad. "He's sorry that Broadway isn't as good as what you call art, Chris." He stops looking at Chris and now turns to me. "I'm sorry I don't want to read about shoes or spend years making ones that no one will see because who looks at feet?" oh that was really hurtful.

"I need some air." Chris stands up abruptly, walking out of the room. After a few seconds he heard the patio door sliding.

"Oh shit," Anna curses.

My gaze falls to the ground. "Do you think it's weird that I like shoes? Really?" I dare to ask him, still keeping my gaze on the ground.

"No," she replied, she was looking at the door and then I see her shake her head. "Not really. It's different, but it works for you."

What are you trying to tell me?

"What do you think I should do about Chris?" I change the subject so quickly, of course after all the only thing that matters is her relationship with Chris and not how I may feel. "Boys have gotten upset with me before, but it's always been for things like I don't want to be with them or talking to another boy. I don't understand why he's upset. I haven't said anything bad about him or his art," she bites her bottom lip for a second. "Well, not really anything bad. Would you go talk to him? See how upset he is?”

"I don't want to get involved, Anna" I looked up at her, with a serious face.

"Get involved? Come on, Ada. You just have to know why he's upset with me. It's asking him a question, and you've done it before. Besides, he didn't go against you."

"He didn't go against you, either. He just came out to take a breather." Of course, it's all about you, isn't it? "And I think you should go out and..."

I stop when Anna gives me a cold look, she is upset.

"I didn't tell you everything that happened last night”

Whats?!

"I asked Mike if he wanted to go out with me. I wanted to show that I can kiss someone else and it wouldn't be like kissing Chris. But it didn't happen like that. I keep thinking about what he would do if he saw me, and it wouldn't be like she was with another guy. I can't even imagine it focusing or anything. I can only see him leaving me and…” he sighs. "I couldn't stand it, and I'm sorry I said what I said about you and your shoes. You're not mad at me, right?”

"Just hurt" I notice Anna's surprised look.

"I didn't mean to..." his voice trailed off. "When I say things like that, I don't mean for them to sound bad. You know that, right?”

I nod, because I know, and Anna smiles as she stands up. She nudges me with her knee to make me follow her.

"Let's go" is already happy again. "Talk to Chris, I'll prepare something to eat."

I stare at her, jealous, I get upset with myself for it and she bites her lip.

"I'm really sorry. I'm a horrible person. You shouldn't go out with me, and now you know why my parents never want to be around me."

Her voice breaks on the last few words, and I know exactly why Anna is the way she is, why she's so quick to say words that hurt more than she thinks. I know why she is so scared of being left behind. Why did it happen to you?

"Your parents suck. Too much," I spoke truthfully. "And I've wanted to be with you since we were in kindergarten."

"Oh really?" I nod my head in response. "Thank you" she whispered, hugging me and then she walks away and pushes me towards the patio door, we walk together towards the door without going through it.

"Look at him" we both looked at Chris. "Its not cute?"

He was standing outside, a few steps from Anna's yard, with his head down, his eyes closed. He looks tired and sad. It made me want to run up to him and hug him and tell him to let it all go.

"He's fine" I speak, Anna laughs and opens the door now pushing me through it gently. Pushing me towards Chris. He turns around as I do so.

He takes a step towards it and I can hear Anna humming as she closes the door. I wanted to go back and sit on the couch.

But really what I want is to be with him out here alone.

"Chris?" I said, hoping my body wouldn't shake like that just from saying his name.

"Hey" he said, turning to face me, the light that was supposed to shine on the back garden and exposed potential thieves or the weed or whatever was there just for him at this moment, just shining on him, and he's magnificent, and I kissed him.

I kissed him, and he kissed me, I should have talked touching his hair, I should have memorized the feeling of his mouth, there should be more than just thinking. "Yes, this is it, this is what I've been waiting for, this is how it had to be."

"Anna is very worried," I said, but the words came very quickly, as if by not getting them out of my mouth quickly enough I would stop thinking. I would stop loving. "She likes you a lot" and now my voice was cracking, but I wasn't sad, I'm not. I forced myself to smile, spreading my mouth wide. "She'll even make you something to eat."

She's never done that for another guy.

He looked at me, and I wondered if he could look inside my head, if he could see the words that I had no longer said out loud, and that I wouldn't dare say.

"Are you okay?" he asked me, still looking at me, I felt my smile slip, fade, and the silence that fell upon us was so full that I could hear nothing, neither the hiss of my heart beating in my chest, nor the sounds around us; insects, the wind, and the other distant rumbles in each other's lives in houses built close, but not too close because when you look out the window all we pretend to be seeing is the new.

But Chris is not mine.

"I'm fine," I replied. Looking over my shoulder, I caught a view of Anna moving around the kitchen, with fluid grace even when doing something as ordinary as making popcorn. She could get extra butter just because she knew I liked it, I knew that about her just like I know she had chickenpox when she was four, and she had a scar on her right ankle because of that, the only place she had been marked, her mother told her that she had been bad for doing that and it made her cry. "I'm fine" I said again, and this time when I looked at Chris I forced myself to look at him with Anna the first time, that first night at the party at the end of summer, and then the moments that came, after school, weeks of them together. Weeks, which I did because I had to see what was real.

"You should go in and talk to her" he pointed inside. "I'll give you five minutes of privacy and then I'll go in, grab my things and leave."

He looked at the ground. "Can I ask you something?"

Yeah. No Yes. I sang internally, I forced myself to shrug my shoulders, to say “sure.” Without words right now I couldn't do anything.

"Ada" He said coming closer, my fingers curled inside my sneakers, waiting. Waiting for whatever was to come. "I need to know something, you... Do you remember the party before school started? You were in the studio and I came in.”

I nodded, watching his torso work, his pale skin caught in the glow of the light falling on the darkness.

"I really wanted to keep talking to you" the words came out in a whisper. "And when I called your house the next day, I didn't call for Anna, Ada. I wanted to talk to you."

"With me?"

"Yes," his voice was rough, intense, and we were too close to touch, but we weren't, we weren't.

But I could feel everything around us, with every breath I took there was the promise of his skin touching mine, and I wanted that.

I wanted us to kiss again, I wanted him to kiss me, I wanted him.

I love him, and he is looking at me like he looked at me that night.

He is looking at me like he wants to kiss me.

"Chris" His name came out of my lips like a plea. I was afraid of this, of him, of me, especially of him and me. But not enough, not as it should. Then his head lowered toward mine and I rose to my feet, longing to find him and then...

And then Anna's mother yelled, "Who the hell parked their car in my garage?!"

author's note. If you want to be part of the taglist leave a comment below and I will add you. Thanks for reading, remember to like, share with your friends and leave a nice comment ^^

taglist. @l34n @jetaimevous @jnkvivi @loveyoumatthewbernard @d1tzy-bl0nde @laxbabe131147 @slut4chriss @dontellaf1lms @surniolozzzprincess @sturnlova @inlovewithchriss @whicked-hazlatwhore @mattsgirlsblog @nsjsnshey @always-reading @y-s-a-p @h3arts4harry

27 notes · View notes

scaphismpriest · 24 hours

Text

Tiktok is a cesspool of ableism against narcissists and usually I shake my head and roll my eyes, but i just saw a Tiktok comment that made my blood boil.

Keep in mind that this was on a cluster B safe post, and someone manages to think its okay to blame abuse on NARCISSISM. I am a person with BPD and NPD, im not going to get personal in my life because this is the internet and not everyone needs to know what ive fucking been through, but i know for damn sure that "narc abuse" is not a fucking thing and generalizes narcissists to be abusers and dangerous people. Sure, you can get abused by a narcissist, but you can also get abused by literary ANYONE, this is why you dont see people say "im suffering from blonde abuse" or "im recovering from christian abuse" because nobody in their fucking right mind would use someones appearance, race, mental health, religon, physical ability, gender, sexuality, ETC as a excuse to label and generalize a group of people to describe abuse. I had a ex girlfriend who would abuse me and she had BPD, I have a mother who also emotionally and verbally abuses me and shes schizophrenic. You dont see me say "im recovering from borderline abuse" or "im suffering from schizophrenic abuse" because that generalizes people with BPD and schizophrenia to be abusers. Do you see the fucking problem here yet? Oh but when its narcissists, or people with "scary mental disorders" like ASPD, then its suddenly okay to label us as scary abusers or dangerous people? Some of You claim to be advocates for mental health but when it comes to us then you suddenly give up because we're "too much for you to waste your time on" or that we're "Hopeless" and "Helpless" if you so called "Empaths", egotypicals, and neurotypicals actually gave a fucking shit about us, you would understand that we've also been hurt, we've been treated like shit and neglected by the world, we bite because we are scared, we are constantly in a battle of self hate and fake ego, we are insecure, we depend on attention and success to survive, we are neglected children at our core. if you really gave a shit about mental health and our well being, i wouldn't be here thinking "wow man i should really rid myself because the world views me as nothing but a monster so therefore i should off myself!" "but you've also hurt people!" I know, I am aware, I've already taken that accountabilty and MAJOR steps into becoming into a better person and have recovered greatly these past months and you dont know or understand me more than the people ive hurt personally, you dont get a say in what happens because thats NOT your ground to stand on and say whatever YOU think and ive had people disrespect that. I am FORTUNATE to even be loved and cared for still by the person ive hurt, and even I myself dont feel like I deserve that such mercy, I am forever grateful but It also makes me truly sad, not for myself, but for the person I love the most. I genuinely cried writing this, this is more so a vent but I hope someone sees this and atleast understand me on a true empathic level, instead of a perception. I hope i dont regret posting this, because this is the most youre gonna see me vulnerable for a LONG time.

#tickle's vents #actually npd #actually narcissistic #actually bpd #actually borderline

19 notes · View notes

bunnydongsik · 1 day

Text

A rant on interpretations of Joowon and Dongsik I guess?

honestly when I finished watching beyond evil back in november and went on tumblr to check out the fandom, I was genuinely shocked by the amount of "daddy dom" Dongsik content lol.

To me, the only character less "daddy dom" in that show is Jeongjae.

I just do not see it at all, it's like a different character to me when I encounter that interpretation. You mean the character who is constantly either crying or on the verge of tears, who is completely falling apart, and whose character arc is mainly letting himself rely on other people and finally letting someone else do the dirty work for him and save him, is "daddy"?? how is my poor pathetic little meow meow bratty menace a "daddy"??

I feel the same way about this like, shy and unsure and blushing Joowon I frequently encounter. who is this??? Where is my arrogant, shameless bitch?? The man who will say, from the bottom of his heart, that he can't help being better than everyone else, who doesn't care about the opinions of those he considers beneath him (so, everyone)

The man who looks at an unsolved, cold case spanning 20 years and many, many murders, and confidently says to himself "yeah I can crack that within three months, with no assistance, no problem"

he will break into every single property that you own and accuse you of murder and put a gun to your head and flirt with you to intimidate you and say the vilest shit, and he will not feel a single ounce of shame for it (until the very unpleasant realisation that his father was the murderer all along. whoops)

The trembling little baby petal imposter is extremely uinteresting to me.

Joowon is the antagonist in the first half of the series, and even for a bit in the second half.

he's supposed to be unlikeable!

he's a rich asshole used to getting his way with zero consequences, used to everything being served on a silver platter, used to being the best, and it is glorious and cathartic every single time to watch him be forced into the mud with all the dirty little peasants and be humiliated by a country bumpkin in a series of the most powerful uno reverse scenes ever witnessed.

Joowon has never been bullied in his life, he IS the bully. A pathetic little bully struggling under the shadow of his father and the fact that no one in his life truly loves him - and that is never excused in the show. it is vital the we only get the scene of his mother abandoning him right before he stops being an asshole and goes all in on redeeming himself.

This means that the show carefully, purposefully never has a scene of Joowon being awful, after it has been revealed what he went through. Thus the audience is never made to excuse his behaviour - that well known feeling of "well ___ happened to him as a child, so I understand why he is doing what he is doing right now"

Beyond Evil is filled with characters who have gone through hell and decided to be better people for it - he has no excuse.

The show really goes out of its way to NOT paint him as a poor little rich boy - he is an asshole with a lot of power at his disposal - power which he uses to tear down the foundation of the power itself, in order to help Dongsik - and that is what makes him so amazing!!! He truly leaves himself with nothing, so that he can save Dongsik, and he feels absolutely zero regret.

the thing that redeems him is his ability to adapt so completely, and utterly change who he is as a person. and it is so important that no one in the series ever tells him that he needs to be a better person, or else!

he comes to that conclusion largely on his own. He simply looks at Dongsik and his fucked up life, and makes the decision to devote himself to helping him. And that is really the main point of his character arc - becoming a person capable of empathy and helping someone else, even if it doesn't help him personally, and even if it actively damages him.

And while the transformation is met with much needed support (Dongsik) and advice (Jaeyi), as I said, no one ever tells him to do it. He is the one who seeks out Jaeyi to ask for advice on friendship and Dongsik clearly tells him several times that he can do and think whatever he wants.

And I loooove him in the epilogue - that maturity that he has developed. that brash arrogance has turned into quiet self assurance and he will show up to the death anniversary of a man whose death he is partially resonsible for, fully expecting to be treated coldly by the people who are essentially bereaved kin, just so that he can pay his respects.

And when he is invited warmly inside he gently informs everyone that he doesn't mind using shared items anymore (he wants to be a part of the community!)

and he looks the man he loves straight in the eyes and quietly but confidently says "I like" (no subject!! because that is how korean works) (also in the BTS rehearsal for the scene Jingoo literally nudges Hakyun's arm after the line and they both giggle. so)

And then the end scene, where Dongsik shows off his own character development and lets himself be emotionally vulnerable so that he can wish Joowon well, even if it's veiled in a joke and clumsy and is still embarassing - and Joowon immediately understands what he means and easily replies back with a joke of his own (don't use banmal with me/don't treat me like a child)

(which, in my opinion means something like "you don't need to worry about me" - which is also such a relief for Dongsik who has lived the last 20 years caring about everyone but himself and desperately doing what he could to avoid losing anyone else and mostly failing oh god oh fuck)

He has come so far!! never has a character like Joowon made me change my opnion of them so radically, from "I loathe him and want to punt him into an active volcano" to like, crying with pride. Look at how far he's come!!!

The way he really swooped into Dongsik's life in order to ruin it, looked at Dongsik and went "he can fix me" without asking, and became a sort of prince from a fairy tale come to save the princess from the dragon instead. what a character!!

I have no idea what this post is? a rant about character interpretations i guess?

also, again, disclaimer, if you like daddy dom dongsik and blushing trembling joowon that is obviously within your right and you're welcome to block me if you hate my interpetrations lol

#beyond evil #jwds #han joowon #lee dongsik #my post #if there are any glaring mistakes blame it on my irritation #irritation at the VERY LOUD PARTY at 1am that prevents me both from sleeping and thinking

19 notes · View notes

dieselpvnk · 4 months

Text

artificer deserves to be extra unhinged, when i draw other slugcats i somewhat care about anatomy, but for artificer - nuh uh !!!! what's more important is that its body bends in extreme ways with sharp angles and the pose has a flow, she can break every bone if it means there's more sharp angles in the drawing

#just rambling #for deletion #rain world #<- i need everyone to see this and understand. like do you understand me. its way more important for arti

423 notes · View notes

spacedlexi · 3 months

Text

the way the ericson group were at the outbreak just a bunch of troubled kids who made various mistakes or committed crimes and were judged by a system that punished and abandoned them instead of giving them the support and love they needed, are then nearly a decade later put into a situation where now they must judge a troubled child for the mistakes and crimes hes committed against them. and 5 to 3 vote them out 😭

#twdg #i love the way s4 connects back to lees whole 'murderer' thing back in s1 😭 guilt...atonement.....systems of punishment #i love thinking about s1>s4 themes and crying #anyway this is partially why i hate when i see the ericson cast reduced down to 'just some teens' its so much more than that #them being abandoned in a boarding school for troubled kids is SO IMPORTANT its not 'just some school'#anyway its also probably why theyre my favorite cast #theyre literally one of if not the most mature group of the series even while being a bunch of kids who make choices i dont agree with #because they actually love and care about each other. even when theyre mad. because theyre all they have left #i do think the vote was a fair way to handle it even tho i still ultimately find it cruel. they couldve talked it out #but this is still a story that needs conflict to resolve so is what it is #they would rather they leave than have to face their confused feelings. the most immature thing they do. but understandable #they did such a good job crafting that cast for clem GOD an entire ensemble built around her and aj....delicious #zombie/post apoc media about love and community my beloved 😭#sorry but get tf out of here with that 'humans are evil and everyone dies' lame ass bullshit we are nothing without community #the amount of love pouring out of s4 is like getting my ass kicked but then they give me a big hug and kiss after and send me on my way #s4 my absolute beloved i really love it more and more every time. so much to appreciate even with it the way it is #the themes bro the themes........ the connections between seasons 1 and 4 you are everything to me #it speaks

58 notes · View notes

mishapen-dear · 7 months

Text

thinking about 4halo again and dying

they just. they used to be so sweet together. and then the election arc managed to genuinely turn them against each other (and bad is still affected by being caged in the museum) and i would NOT have been surprised if a rebellion had started within the next few weeks after their last fight and. they used to be friends and then they almost destroyed each other

and then the eggs went missing

and there are so many parallels between them, but one of the biggest parallels is how they're both protectors. they both protected the eggs (and, when he became president, forever extended that protection to the other islanders) but the eggs went missing and they had to put all of that aside. Forever was quicker to put it down than Bad was (it felt like only a very temporary truce, from Bad's end), but they put their problems on hold, because their eggs. were gone.

and another parallel. the destruction. both of them with their plans to cause ruin because then, maybe, theyll get their kids back. bad caused most of the grieving arc damage directly, and got aypierre and antoine to help him. he dug holes in the ground. he placed mines everywhere and leapt into them. he started the lavacasting process of the fed building (and was interrupted by admins, so he stopped, but philza and fit were still right to laugh at him lmaoo). he drilled a hole through the side of the federation office from a huge distance away. he has chosen to hurt his friends and himself to get the eggs back. whatever the cost.

forever destroyed the island. or he planned to destroy the island. or he was interrupted just before he destroyed the island or or or. I don't know. but it was big, and it was bad. bad enough that the feds had to step in and forcefully drug him, and kickstart the happy pills arc.

and the happy pills arc..... oughghghgh as fucking awful as it was for their characters to experience i genuinely truly think that it saved them from each other. when he was first told about forever being fucked up bad was still in the "i need to kick his butt" mindset, and was all ready for an excuse to kill forever. and then he saw forever. and the first proposal happened. and bad was angry and he was sad and upset and he was careful. forever tried to kill him. bad decided to save him. forever kept trying to marry him. forever kept taking the pills. forever was so scared of his own anger and all of the damage he could and would have caused to his family that he kept taking drugs that kept him so out of his mind he hallucinated his son was just sleeping safely at his house.

and they both tried to kill each other. and they both failed.

and bad showed phil and cellbit (and tubbo) the item scanner that dapper discovered, which could destroy him, because nothing else was working. because they needed to save forever. because bad was reminded by then that forever was a victim of the federation instead of just a mouthpiece for it. and then when forever woke up he saw bad, suffering, and so excited to see him awake.

and now they're here on opposite sides again with forever projecting his protection urges onto the fed worker in bad's basement and bad frustrated that he isn't being believed and his evil plans of giving ron lemons apology brownies is being interrupted and. look at them. soft "i hate you" and the appreciation room and bad's quiet heartbreak when he learned about forever being missing and the "i miss you" book bad got mad at because it asked him not to torture fed workers. does anyone hear me im so ill about them. do you understand they care about each other so much and the happy pills arc reminded them of that. forever realized bad is colourblind and bad assumed forever was poisoning him and then forever helped bad cheat on another colourblindness test and forever was giving bad flowers and bad was accepting them and accepted that he was colourblind despite his previously constant denial and! i don't know if im being comprehensible and i dont really care i will be honest i just need you to know i am frothing at the mouth like a rabid little beast. they are a TRAGEDY of miscommunication and external pressure but they love so so much. platonic or romantic or qpp they CARE and it tears me to shreds

#qsmp #4halo #i feel like ive talked about this exact thing like three separate times but #its one of those things that really Kills Me #and its CRUCIAL to understanding them and their relationship #they were fighting and now have found peace in hell #and forever using his care for bad as a distraction to not focus on his Own woes #and the way he's so sure bad needs help the way he was helped that at heart bad is a good person who doesnt want to be hurting people #and in a Way he's right. bad doesn't want to hurt his loved ones. everyone else? yeah. in a heartbeat. but his family...#but he's still makign the choice to do it. it's not lashign out in desperation the way forever destroying the island was #bad is hurting people with Purpose. he's putting thought into it. he's testing people and their knowledge and their motivations and he will #use them all as tools that can be bent and broken if it means they get the eggs back. he'll do it to himself too #especially to himself #ghhhgrhrgh the way theyre both self sacrificial and self destructive the Parallels the fucking parallels #i can best examine their relationship from a bbh pov and it agonizes me because i can't get all the nuance of forever's pov #because i dont speak portuguese yet :c #so best i can do is talk crazy about them like a Lure for other analyst shippers #pspspssps dont you see my ship. dont you see how canon 4halo is !!! in 8 acts #dont you want to examine them and their parallels and the way they are both so strange about relationships but they're finding a way to car #in a way that works for them #pspspsps #like me talking about qbbh vacation arc got the fandom acknowledging his sillies and directly got me a friend to talk about him to (hi kia!#maybe it will work here also #come to the dark side we have complex relationship dynamics that are frequently misunderstood and mislabelled #YOU can help change the world

112 notes · View notes

taikanyohou · 2 years

Photo

“Don’t you want me to disappear? Shoot me already. Shoot me! I don’t think you can.” KINNPORSCHE (2022) : EPISODE 13.

#vegaspete #kinnporsche #asianlgbtqdramas #*#faiza gifs #and THIS is THE LINE OF THE EPISODE FOR ME.#'and you know why' .... like it conveys EVERYTHING without giving ANYTHING away #it ALL remains unsaid and NO BODY ELSE will probably EVER understand what vegas sees in pete or what pete sees in vegas #and u know what? NO ONE needs to know or understand apart from them 2 alone what they mean and bring and give to one another #just a simple 'and you know why ...'#you know why you chose me and i chose you #you know why we don't kill each other even though we drive each other to the BRINK to do so #you know why i am the way i am and #i know why you are the way you are #and everyone else will know a million different reasons why we're bad for each other #but you know why we're bound together made for one another. and that is what keeps us going.#LIKE. ITS ONE FUCKING LINE. BUT THE GRAVITAS. OH THE GRAVITAS OF IT

716 notes · View notes

todayisafridaynight · 10 months

Note

YOU MAKE THAT POST AND DON'T SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON EVERYONE'S OPINION ON SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG???

I MEAN IT'S SUCH A NICHE FUCKING TOPIC LMAO I DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WOULD CARE

but anyway here's the Egregiously Simplified version of Everyone Is Forced To Play Ten Routes Of Shadow The Hedgehog And Has To Give Their Opinion Afterwards

#snap chats #i already hear someone going 'the fuck you mean mine is number one shadow the hedgehog defender' YOU WILL LISTEN TO ME #at first i do think he'd be like 'what the fuck' but then going through all of shadows routes. or at least ten to get the final story #and seeing the constant betrayal and inability to trust others he faced yet still ultimately persevering due to his promise to maria #i think bro would be moved.. just a little.. would he think shadow a bit headassed for that considering what the humans did to him #Of Course but also its evident that shadows clearly taking things into his own hands now- as righteous of a mission as it is #despite the persistent attempted influence by everyone around him. shadows a complicated TRAGEDY he'd be moved #mine's artsy like that..... gotta go before i get shot ive said insane things before but this one'll take the cake me thinks #im not explaining everyone else mine's just felt like the one i NEEDED to explain lest i look more insane than usual #06 daigo's purely a Shadow Angst enjoyer. he understands shadow and he's wallowing in the misery of his backstory #majima's weird to categorize cause he definitely can be like Lmao The Fuck and/or just play the game chaotically #and then the aspects of identity come in and on the outside he'll be like 'bro its not that deep' but on the inside its like #Damn He Just Like Me Fr. i think. idk i dont study majima leave me alone im not making ANOTHER One Chara Exclusive category #i said i wouldnt explain anyone else and here i am explaining shut UP im gonna go eat #im not looking at this anymore bye #FORCING myself to leave cause i really will just end up typing essays on bitches perceiving shadow LMAOO

30 notes · View notes

malwarechips · 9 months

Text

ok hot take: arti is NOT balanced. specifically her combat. not in an overpowered way, but the opposite. she's not strong enough for combat against scavengers. arti has ZERO abilities to resist spears outside of the parry, which requires timing and honestly quite impressive reaction speed. ("just turn the game speed down!" some people cant play with the speed lowered! (me) ive been playing since before downpour and ive NEVER used the mushrooms so im USED to this speed. turning it down throws me off so much that id die MORE) sure, she can resist explosives somewhat, she wont die to them, but she still gets stunned anyways. so who cares if shes immune to death from explosives when she cant do anything PASSIVELY about spears, the thing that matters. you survive a grenade, but then you get stabbed in the head a second later and die anyways. scavengers weren't designed to be fought. they have a reputation system for a reason. they're the sort of creature you dont fuck with because they WILL fuck your shit up beyond belief. arti goes against all of that. and shes not strong enough to. she doesn't have resistences to what MATTERS. fighting large groups can be near impossible sometimes. and sure, you can avoid those most times, but you physically cannot in metro. you HAVE to fight them at least SOMEWHAT to even get through.

i understand how people can like arti. but the problem is she's simply not strong enough. i understand that rain world is MEANT to be difficult, but arti takes it too far imo. she's difficult into unfairness. sure, losing karma doesn't matter. but doing the same thing again and again and again just... is terrible. even if you take a different route. i took different routes almost every other time i died while playing arti. i still got sick of dying. i was so relieved when i beat it. i never plan on playing her again. she brought me genuine, terrible stress. she killed my drive to want to play rain world for a while; the thought of just opening it stressed me out. games are meant to be fun. i can understand how arti could be, but she just isnt to me. she's not fun. she will never be fun for me without significant altering. and even then, i highly doubt i could ever bring myself to play her again. just looking at her select screen art makes me anxious.

#i want to emphasise that i dont care if ppl do enjoy arti. im glad. i have nothing against ppl who enjoyed her campaign #its just.. i wish i knew people who had the same experience as i did #''get the arti revives on kill mod!'' i have it. ive had it the entire time . i have it set to the max time it will let me set it to.#it barely helped #sorry that this turned into more of a vent i just . really needed to get this out .#ive always struggled with feeling like im bad at games and will never get better and just .#seeing everyone else LOVE arti's campaign just... has made that so much worse.#i love arti as a character . i really do.#i think her campaign has potential. but its not executed well .#i WANTED to like it. i TRIED to like it. i cant.#i both understand how people could and dont understand at the same time.#how can you guys cope with doing the same thing 60 times in a row? does it not stress you out? does it not get boring?#do you not get sick of it? i dont get it #i just ... want to feel good at something.#i felt somewhat good at rain world for a while . i still do sometimes . but then i remember arti. and i feel like an outlier again .#lev.txt #hyperfixation.txt #vent #<- kinda #rain world #long post #<- somewhat . idk

28 notes · View notes