#(also why i like bisexual bc i am bisexual and biromantic and i like saying that after coming to that conclusion

[dawningfairytale]

how did i realise i was bi both so quickly and so slowly

#like #on the one hand #the moment i realised i was attracted to women (both times) i went: oh. bisexual. cool. fuck. now i'm oppressed. #and i wasn't like 'but i like boys and girls what could this possibly mean??' it was more. oh yeah no okay this logically has to be bisexua #and there was like wondering if there was split attraction in that (i don't think there is for me) but i was like. either way. there's #some non-platonic attraction for more than one gender #(also why i like bisexual bc i am bisexual and biromantic and i like saying that after coming to that conclusion #also i find it rolls off the tongue better than bi) #but GIRL #why did you get so excited to get this girl's phone number #better: why were you so desperate to get this girl's phone number #i know you were excluded and wanted to make friends but why these girls specifically #why did they make you feel like that #also the kiss dreams #like you have a dream where you make out with your friend in a dark closet. cool. subtle. #i think google said 'it could?? just be a friendship thing' so i ran with that but uh. i had a crush on her through my whole senior year #it was not just a friend thing #especially not given how much i liked it #also. why the dreaming about kissing an imaginary girl? which you also enjoyed? like. babe make it make sense #'yes i love watching glee s5 toxic and ikag but For The Outfits' are you kidding me #to be fair. never took an am i gay test. because i knew that was a common queer experience and I Was Not Queer #how come i knew that at such a young age? #there were. so many signs.

[vampireqrow-moved]

um its my birthday so wait until 12:01am pst to block me if u hate this post 🥰🥰

long story short the pansexual label is redudant and actively harmful (its far from the worst problem bisexuals face but it is one issue) and i dont hate anyone who identifies as pan because A) those ppl are bi like me and B) i used to identify as pan myself.

if thats enough for you to block me and make a callout post for me then i cant stop you but pretty please either read this whole thing or just wait a few minutes for my bday to end 🥰🥰

anyways im kicking off this point with some personal experiences bc i love to talk to myself. i got introduced to the pan label at maybe 10ish years old, and started identifying with it pretty much right away. i heard about it before bisexual and it was pitched as attraction to all genders and of course trans people. i was of course a trans ally! i had trans friends! i was trans also but hadnt figured it out yet! the way i had heard of it, there was no bisexual, there was no need for bisexual, and identifying differently was excluding trans people, which I was certainly against. being bisexual was trans exclusionary and why would i exclude trans people? the 'hearts not parts' slogan was thriving around this time and i genuinely said it and meant it.

as i started to become more online, mostly through roleplaying websites and tumblr here, i started hearing of bisexuality. it was supposedly an older term, so older people still used it, but it was common knowledge that pansexual was the better, inclusive label and younger people should adopt the new inclusive language instead of the old and transphobic words like bisexual. /s

and then bi and pan solidarity was all the rage! pansexual wasnt erasing bisexuality, why did anyone ever think that? bi and pan were two separate and complete identities that were valid and had to be respected or youre a mean exclusionist. and an asexual person, hearing people labelled exclusionist always meant they were excluding people from the lgbta community who rightfully belonged, denying peoples lived experiences, and generally telling people theyre wrong about their sexuality because theyre too young. and all of those things were bad and had hurt me, so it would be ridiculous to change labels and support "pan exclusionists" because they were just as bad as ace and aro exclusionists, and they were all the same people. or so it seemed to me at that time.

then, 'hearts not parts' began getting called out for blatant transphobic by insinuating that pansexual was the only identity that loved people for their "hearts" and personalities instead of those gross gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and even straights who only saw people for their "parts". (STRAIGHT PEOPLE ARE NOT OPPRESSED. I AM MERELY POINTING OUT THAT PANSEXUALITY WAS SHOWN AS ABOVE ALL OTHERS.) many pan people, including myself, began to denounce the slogan and insist pansexuality wasnt transphobic, there had just been a coincidence that a transphobic slogan was everywhere and a huge part of people's explantions of and associations with pansexuality. hint: it wasnt a coincidence.

from my perspective, this is when i began to see people discussing dropping the word pansexual. that seemed to be a huge step from getting rid off a transphobic slogan, and these people were just meanies who hated microlabels. and i like microlabels! as a genderfluid person, and someone who has friends who use specific aro and acespec labels, ive seen how people can use them to name specific experiences while still acknowleging their presence underneath umbrella terms like aromantic, asexual, nonbinary, lgbta, and for some people, queer.

pansexuals dont do that. they dont label pansexuality as a specific set of experiences under the bisexual umbrella, they see themselves as a separate identity, and even if they started to, the history of biphobia and transphobic undeniably linked to the existence of pansexuality in enough to stop being worth using. but i digress. pansexualitys shiny new definition that many people cling to is that pansexual is attraction to all genders. bisexual is two or more genders.

which. frankly? doesnt make any sense. my guess is that its supposed to be inclusive of nonbinary genders and those a part of cultures who historically have not had a binary gender system in the first place. i cannot speak for the latter group, but as a nonbinary person, its not inclusive. anyone can be attracted to nonbinary people. literally anyone. theres no way to know if everyone you meet is nonbinary or not. whether or not a nonbinary person reciprocates those feelings and is interested in pursuing a relationship is completely up to the individual, regardless of the sexualities of the people involved.

bottom line is that you cant number the amounts of genders someone can be attracted to, thus rendering those definitions pointless. people can be attracted to all kinds of people regardless of gender, even if they are gay, a lesbian, or straight. all people can date thousands of nonbinary genders if all people involved are interested and comfortable with it. numbering the genders you can be attracted to diminishes the post of nonbinary, as it is not a third gender, it simply any experience not fitting within the western concept of the gender binary (if the person so chooses to identify as such. if you cant tell already, the nonbinary experience is varied between every single nonbinary person.) important to note also that no widely accepted bisexual text defines bisexual as attracted to exclusively two genders or even the "two or more genders". i know this is used a lot but please read the bisexual manifesto. its free online i promise.

some people also claim pansexuals experience "genderblind" attraction while bisexuals feel differently attracted to different genders. this is very nitpicky for whats supposed to be two unconnected idenities, but thats only part of the problem. this definition is also not in any widely accepted bisexual texts, and bisexuality has never excluded those who experience genderblind attraction. i am in fact a bi person who experiences genderblind attraction. this does not mean i am not bisexual. it simply means i experience bisexuality differently than other bisexuals, and thats wonderful! no broad communities like bisexuality are expected to all share the same experience. we are all so different and its amazing were able to come together under the bisexual flag.

last definition, or justification i should say, is that yes these definitions are redundant and theyre the same sexuality, but people prefer different labels and thats okay. i agree in principle. people can define themselves as many things like homosexuals or gays or lesbians or queers or even other reclaimed slurs, while still not labelling themselves under the most "common" or "accurate" labels.

but pansexuality isnt the same as bisexuality, which may sound silly but hear me out. it has been continually used as a way to further divide bisexuals, who are already subject to large amounts of lgbta discrimination. "pansexuality was started by trans people who were upset with transphobia within the bisexual community! it cant be transphobic OR biphobic!" except of course that it can and it is. to say that trans people cant be transphobic is absurd. transmedicalism is right there, but thats not what im getting at. all minorities can have internal and sometimes external biases against people who are the same minority as them.

pansexuality was started as a way to be trans inclusive at the expense of labelling bisexuality as transphobic when its not. transphobia is everywhere, and bisexuals are not exempt. instead of working on the transphobia within the community, the creators of pansexuality decided to remove themselves from it to create a better and less tainted word and community, and the fact that pansexuality is intended to replace bisexuality or leave it for the transphobes goes to show a few things. pansexuality and bisexuality are inherently linked because the pan label is in response to the bi label. due to its origins, it is inherently competing with bisexuality and it cant be "reclaimed" from its biphobic roots. pansexuality is not a whole, separate, and valid label. its a biphobic response to issues within the bisexual community.

to top off this post, heres something a full grown adult once said to me. in person. she was my roommate. "i feel like im pan because im attracted to trans people. trans women, trans men, i could definitely date them. but not nonbinary people because thats gross and weird." she saw pan as trans inclusive and defined herself that way as opposed to bi which is shitty!

also a little extra tidbit about my experiences identifying as pan. i saw myself as better than every bi person. all of them. even my trans and bi friends. whenever they brought up being bisexual i would think to myself "why dont you identify as pansexual? its better and shows people you support trans people." because i was made to believe bisexuality didnt and was therefore inferior. thats the mindset that emerged from my time in the pansexual community. i am so sorry to all of my bisexual friends even if they never noticed. i love you all and hope you have a great day. this also goes to any bisexuals or people who identify as bi in anyway, such as biromantic or simply bi. love you all.

ummm yeah heres some extra reading i found helpful and relevant. here and here. also noooo dont disagree with me and unfollow me im so sexy 🥴🥴🥴

#if u have follow up questions ill probably answer them 2morrow #if u ask something just be nice its my birthday 🙄🙄 #anyways time to tag this lol ! #pansexuality #biphobia #transphobia #q slur #long post #my post #ask to tag maybe??

[queer-as-frikc]

Hey not trying to be rude or anything I am just seriously uneducated in this topic, what exactly is bi/pan lesbians. I understand how everyone is saying let people choose the label they want and i fully support it. But isn't the definition of bi/pan a person who likes two or more gender or like all genders? And lesbians like women only? As a fellow bisexual, this is just not making much sense to me (mostly because I am not educated in this matter). Again I am not trying to come off as an asshole, sorry to bother I just wanna know......and I am too scared to ask off anon in fear of people coming after me.

thanks for actually asking in a civilized way instead of outright rejecting them! im not a pan lesbian, im full on pan, which is why i cant directly share my experiences, but from the little research i’ve done through google and talking to 1 (one) person i know who identifies as a bi lesbian, i’ve gathered that it basically means that some people identify as bi/pan but are only/more attracted to the feminine part of the gender spectrum, ie, women, femme enbies, etc. these people want to add a label to their label bc it makes them feel more specified and makes them feel like the full version of themselves =)

also, this is no different than identifying as, say, a panromantic asexual, or a biromantic pansexual, etc =)

[barrysjumpsuit]

hey, i saw in your bio that you identify as ace/aro. could you elaborate on why you identify as that? i'm thinking im ace and maybe aro but i'm not really sure. they're not talked about a lot :/ no worries if you're not comfortable with talking about it or if you'd prefer i come off anon and ask

hi anon! i agree, aro/ace identities aren't talked about enough and i definitely had a hard time finding resources to use to figure out what i identify as.

in case this is triggering to anyone, explanation under the cut :)

i'll start with the asexual part of it - this was pretty easy bc i've never felt any sexual urges? like idk how to explain it bc i don't know what it DOES feel like. i basically compare sex to a hobby - i'm just disinterested in it.

the aromantic part is a bit different and i'd say i more accurately identify as grey or demi-ro. in my head, some romantic gestures seem okay (i.e. read my fanfics - i'm all about all that stuff in my head) but when it actually comes to it, i'm not really a fan. i'll take it, and might enjoy it, but am mostly impartial to it and probably won't reciprocate romantic gestures. this gets a bit different from person to person when it comes to love languages (idk what mine is tbh). i've been in one long relationship and made him gifts/bought him things/etc because i felt obligated to, he was way more romantic than i was and it ended because it was suffocating me and not fair to him since i didn't return anything.

i also overall identify as bi since i'm into both men and women, but i wouldn't call myself bisexual or even biromantic.

relationships are just weird, man. there are some people where i could definitely see myself actively wanting and enjoying one, but i've never had any of those people be in to me. it's definitely rough.

i'm usually up front with people about the asexual part of it all - i have had bad things come out of that, though. most guys just ghost me when i tell them. others will say shit like "well that's gonna have to change" or "we'll have to make compromises" and if you hear that from anyone, RUN. i've gone along with it once because i liked the guy and let's just say it didn't end well.

i hope this helps! just remember that your identity and labels are for YOU, because no one knows how you feel about these things better than you. there's also no shame in changing them. i've flipped my aro identity a ton and i'm still not 100% set on being called aromantic, because all of these are a spectrum!!!

anon, if you (or anyone else) ever wants to chat about this, let me know! this is a safe space :)<3

#anon

[giselles-dumping-hat]

💢,🏳️‍🌈, 🎶,💕 for thé hyperfixation ask thingy?

[what do you NOT like about your hyperfixation? is there something you would like to change about it?] The Ending :( /j ok but seriously I don’t rlly know? not counting outside forces related to the hyperfixation but not in itself, I cant really think abt something that I genuinely dislike about it come to think of it? Like literally I could spend hours gushing abt every little detail and how I either love or at least appreciate them deadass. Only thing that really comes to mind isn’t dependent on Hadestown itself, it being that I know that it will never come to we’re I love bc I’m not in the states which sucks major L 😔 Btw this isn’t me saying that hadestown is a perfect work of art that can do no wrong but I just, I just can’t think of anything I don’t like abt it or would want to change abt it lmao

[do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you?] ok I answered one in the prev question However! I have like, a bajillion more headcanons living in my head rent free so lemme share 2 others, all of the cast is bi (minus Hermes who’s gay because), just all of it, damn ass bi energy, whether in bisexual and/or biromantic form, I don’t even know how they do it like, what the Fuck, I love them. And also Eurydice’s a lumberjack. She just, she just Is, okay? (I stole this hc from @flowers-inthepieshop btw, but it just lives in my mind constantly)

[if your hyperfixation has songs/an ost, what is your favorite song from it?] godddd,,fuck I don’t, know??? How can you make me choose smh can’t I just say the whole thing?? But mmmmm honestly I love all of hadestown equally and sometimes a specific song loops in my mind for a few days and then another but,, ig if I had to choose it would be Way down hadestown (reprise)? Genuinely don’t know why, it’s just an underrated banger honeslty, I love it sm. Plus also starring my fav char, and speaking of...

[tell us about one of your favorite characters and why you like them!] EURYDICE TIME !!!! Did you see that transition there? I am so cool I know. But yea Eurydice!! God I love her sm. She’s just! She’s just so cool. She’s a survivor who’s run away from people and bad situations all her life due to living in an apocalyptic setting and trauma and fear of getting hurt, telling herself that this way she was safe and people wouldn’t her and she wouldn’t get hurt if she kept going off her own and onky relying on herself and not trusting Anyone, at the price of severe loneliness. She’s a Hungry Young Girl, she’s been through a lot and she doesn’t take shit from anybody and keeps her walls up.. that is, until she meets Orpheus and reluctantly starts letting her guard down, she slowly starts freeing herself esp from livin it up on top (the choreography shows her starting to show her fun self more) onward and becomes fully vulnerable in all ive ever known when she opens up to Orpheus and- Wait fuck I might actually stop here bc this is starting to sound and make me think of potentially making a Eurydice character study LMAO, which 👀. But anyway!! Why do I like her? Bc I personally relate A Lot to her and her arc, and she’s really well written and I love how Anaïs made it so that the character had agency contrary to the myth! Very Cool. Major comfort character 1000/10 I love her

Tysm for asking!!!

#answer tag #hadestown #Eurydice

[ayy-spec]

Anything to Add?

The final question in this survey was a write-in section for people to leave any additional comments. 113 people responded.

Important/Particularly Interesting Comments

• I hope this goes well for you because you seem nice and if you have any advice for new to the community 15 year olds like me, don't be afraid to share because I'm trying to embrace my sexuality as much as possible but it can be hard when I don't know where to go or turn to to find what I'm supposed to do and where to ask questions and just fully embrass this part of me and it can be hard when I don't even know many if any aspecs so representation is great and it is helpful to hear your experiences and how you handle certain parts, so just keep doing what your doing because it is making a difference [note: 🥺🥺😭]

• i often consider myself more as just aroace rather than aro and ace seperately so i prefer seeing the blue and orange aroace flag over the individual aro and ace flags

• I don't really shorten my identity often with aroace, only when im feeling very romance repulsed and its been a while since I felt romantic attraction. I am a pan-demiromantic asexual. My pan label makes me feel more connected to the lgbt+ community bc it feels like my nonbinary and intersex status doesn't count either. I know I belong in the queer community, but the lgbt+ community is so sexual orientation focused.

• Thank you for having a wide variety of labels to choose from in the options!! I don't see the term aegoromantic very often on things, it feels nice to be known I guess haha

• Thank you for this, i recently started thinking about being in arospec and it was so relieving, all this time i thought something was wrong or maybe i was broken. I'm still trying to learn more about it, and I'm grateful for people willing to teach and help

• didn't realize I hadn't experienced sexual attraction until I finally did and was like "OH, no wonder all my other relationships felt like I was playing pretend"

• I dont often tell people I'm gray aroace. Not because of shame or it not being "as important" (I'm a gay trans dude) but I think because I just feel its a very intimate part of myself, as well as my romanticism and sexuality (in terms of like asexuality) feeling as though it doesn't always need a label. I'm fine just being myself most of the time, a lot of labels can be tricky for myself I think. I'm happy the label exists nonetheless though because Its nice to know I'm not the only one who feels like this.

• I'm queer! But if I'm getting down to the bones of it, I'm pan/ace. Still relearning how to be proud of that, after The Grand Clusterfuck years back.

• even though I would be considered to have an alloromantic orientation, alloace isn't really a term I feel any strong connection or attachment to

• i'd like to add that i do consider myself alloaro and use that label openly but i'd also not consider myself 100% allosexual. i'm questioning my sexuality but even if i do end up feeling more solidly ace-spec i'd still use the alloaro label

• Idk who else does this or if this is interesting enough to write down, but I thought I would! I use Aroace as a label. Other, smaller labels inside that would probably fit me better! Aroace feels too big, like it doesn't *really* define exactly who I am. But at the same time, I prefer using it because more people know what Aroace means (at least compared to myrromantic and myrsexual). I use Aroace so the public can define me. I don't typically use it around my close friends 'cause they already know my idiosyncrasies and where I really am. They already made their own definitions for me, so I don't have to make one for them!

• I'm still figuring myself out, so I leave myself at the blanket terms and hopefully everything'll work out in the end

The rest of the responses are below:

Comments Alerting Me About Typos (that I was then able to resolve)

• There's a typo in your "sexual orientation labels" question, because you have Aroflux listed and not Aceflux, but I didn't want to confuse things so I put Aceflux (which I do use) under Other. I also am polysexual (I flux between polysexual and asexual but I am always aegosexual) but didn't know if I should but it under Other anywhere since it's not an acespec label. I consider my polysexuality tied to me being aego/aceflux though, which is why I mention it here.

• the sexual orientations options are the same of the romantic ones ( for example, there's arovague and arospike in the sexual cathegory)

People Clarifying/Expounding Upon Their Own Identity/Experiences

·  to clarify: i'm unsure whether or not i am demi or aceflux; so i use graysexual since both labels technically fall under that as an umbrella term.

• I’m still a confused gorl and I really only know that I don’t like sex it sexual acts but I do like romantic and sensual acts

• Sex/romance repulsed and I have aesthetic attraction

• I'm also animesexual and fictosexual (and romantic I guess but I don't like using the SAM for myself).

• I have never seen most of these labels, haha, I expect one of them is the one I always forget that's for being aro due to past trauma but people always assume it's romantic/sexual trauma so I don't use it and thus have forgotten it...but that's the essay I'm not usually up for writing: was biromantic but then had several awful life events on top of each other and had a complete breakdown and have been aro since. Unclear if it's permanent but it's been 14 years now. [note: I believe this person is thinking of caedromantic]

• I tend to use the word ace more than asexual because it's shorter, but I don't feel more favorably about one than the other.

• i can't tell the difference between platonic vs romantic attraction, and am unsure if people i have "liked" in the past was romantic, platonic, or a fake stemming from peer pressure.

• Also Gender-Neutral/Agender

• I’m gray-aro but identify more with being biromantic even though I know I’m aro-spec. As for sexual orientation, I’m just completely ace xD

• The fact I'm still trying to figure out my gender makes it harder to pinpoint exactly what my orientations are :( but I usually say I'm queer, and if it's safe: Bi Ace, and if I can get more specific: biromantic grey-asexual

• I also use a platonic label (biplatonic). I use it not in a friendship way, but more like in a QPR way.

• Thank you for doing this! My identity on the aro/ace spectrums has shifted a lot over the years and while I’ve just settled on aroace and queer for the most part, this community is so diverse and under appreciated. People who find joy in/identify with micro-identities are valid and deserve representation!

• I'm still figuring out my romantic orientation but it's looking less allo by the day lmao

• My romantic label is very fluid, but in terms of sexual labels, very sex repulsed Asexual

• Content with just Aspec cause it's difficult to pinpoint anything but cool with both asexual/ace and aromantic/aro

• I think of my romantic orientation as halfway between aromantic and homoromantic

• I'm a polyamorous ace, if there'd be a way to include that sometimes that'd be neat :)

• I am still questioning my identity

• I used to identify as 100% ace but now I have no idea other than that I seem to be pan-ace in some way shape or form so my identity is ???people???

• Sex/romance repulsed and I have aesthetic attraction

• to clarify: i'm unsure whether or not i am demi or aceflux; so i use graysexual since both labels technically fall under that as an umbrella term.

Queer Rights

• Trans rights, baybee 🤠🦂

• I just hope a-spec and aro-spec people will experience less negativity and hate this year <3

• Aspec rights!!

• aspec rights, baby

People Being Nice to Me  (I appreciated this thank you everyone!!)

·  :)

• Have a good day

• Uhhh, cool survey, nice to see a lot of labels.... good job! Nothing I have to add, it was great

• Have fun chief, thank you for your work

• Thank you for creating!

• thanks for the survey! I don't know too many aspec in person so I love participating in things like this about the ace/aro community!

• Thank you for what you’re doing

• just hi :)

• thanks!!

• I really love your blog! Reading your posts always makes me happy :) [note: thank you!]

• Good luck, have a nice day !

• I hope you're having a good day :)

• you're lived and valid af!! have a great day!!!

• Thank you for all your hard work i really appreciate it ☺️

• Drink some water Right Now OP

• Nope, :> hope the best for you.

• Cool survey, 10/10 would survey again.

• 💛

• Have a nice day uwu

• Nope! Have a nice day!

• Thank you for making pride flag edits! They're really nice! [note: thank you!!]

• nope, but this is really cool!!

• ❤️

• Have a good day.

• I think this survey idea is super cool! Definitely a great way to see what sort of aspec people are on tumblr :)

• You are doing the lords work

• Thank you for asking us.

• good luck!

• This is really cute idea :)

• I hope you're having a nice day!

• Good luck in your endevours!

• Thank you for making our community visible!

• Have a good day :3

• Have a good day!!

• Keep doing great stuff!

• Thank you for all the positivity I get from your blog! It's super helpful, keep it up :) [note: thank you!!]

• thanks for doing this. recognition is always nice

• Have fun <3

• Lots of love 💛

• This is a cool project, thanks for doing it and good luck! :)

People Saying They Love Me (and I love you, random a-specs)

·  i love you OP!!!!!

• love you, hope you have a great day

An A-Spec Person Being Rude to Other A-Specs

• If you enjoy sex with your romantic partner then you are not asexual

A Person Who Is Not A-Spec Being Rude To A-Specs

• sweetie im sorry that you're so insecure that you feel like you have to make up new identities to feel better about yourself. if you are a lesbian or bisexual please know that you are welcome in the community, but other than that making thousands of microlabels like this makes a huge joke out of what was once an important and respected group. nobody takes us seriously anymore because of this shit. does labelling your identity like this really help you with anything? demisexual and fraysexual and all this are just fancy words for normal human feelings that everyone has. there is no need to microlabel it.

Other

· [variations of “no” (12)]

• not sure that helps lmao but still hope it does. all the best

• Axolotls (or as I like to call them, asexulotls) are amazing and I love them [Note: the man in question]

• Sorry, I can't remember the names of any blogs that do edits

• Ok random but the colors of the aro/ace flag? The blue and orange one? They’re gorgeous.

• I'm not so sure if I should use the aroace flag, I feel comfortable using both aro and ace flags, but I don't like the colors for the aroace flag :c [note: these are in chronological order, it’s a total coincidence that these comments are together]

• Curious to see where the survey goes

• It would be cool if you could also do some aplatonic-spectrum edits!

• there were fully half of the terms on that list that i had never even seen before. like, everything below litho down to no label was entirely new to me. at some point i will look into those! (but not right now, my brain is full enough at the moment)

• actually had to look up the majority of these orientations. Thank you for the opportunity to learn!

• Gonna reblog and follow and hopefully learn a bit more, about others and myself

Note: The only comment that is not listed in order is the first comment, which I put at the top because I found it the most important. It’s so important that kids and teens have space to explore their identity and learn about themselves. The reason I made this blog in the first place was because I was 19 and working on figuring out my gender and sexuality. Now that I’m a bit older and understand things better, I’m so glad that I’m able to help people in this way. 

I make it a point to be very openly queer in my life and at work because I need LGBTQ+ people, especially youths, to know that we’re here. I’m lucky that I live somewhere that I can be visibly queer and speak about it openly. We are everywhere, and there’s more of us than you think!

Something that I really like about the comments at the top is that they show how diverse we are, and how people use words differently. Some people feel like they’re more aroace than aromantic and asexual separately, and others consider their romantic and sexual orientations to be completely different things.

I definitely relate to the person who identifies are myrromantic and myrsexual with their friends but just says aroace when speaking with people they don’t know as well. I believe a lot of people use different words depending on who they’re speaking with.

#survey results #aphobia cw

[les-bi-cons]

If you don’t mind me asking, what does bilesbian mean? I mean I think it means a bisexual leaning more towards females but then again I’m probably wrong. Sorry if that offended you in some way. I’m just curious is all

youre fine!! i dont mind ppl asking! for some, bi lesbian for themselves could simply mean theyre bi with a female lean, but its usually not used so. for me, people usually say to me that i should just say im bi with a preference, but i do not feel like that is enough to really define my identity. my attraction to men isnt Zero, but it Is practically almost nonexistant, and even when i do have the very rare and small attraction for irl guys, i NEVER feel feelings even CLOSE to remotely as strong for them as i do for women/enbies. "preference" does not say how much i am EXTREMELY gay for women that is incomparable to my attraction to men.

then theres also a lot of other different ways people use the term, and itd be best to check out the #explanation tag on my other blog @bi-lesbian to get more info about how a lot of ppl like me and others use the identity and why! for a short couple examples (and definitely not all of the ways ppl use the term), ppl often use it if theyre homoromantic/bisexual, biromantic homosexual, like only women and enbies (which they could be using only one term or the other if theyd like, but some people prefer to use both bc they fit both), or they could simply be reclaiming lesbian back to being an umbrella term, bc bi women always belonged under the lesbian label until biphobes started forcing them out of it.

i hope that and my other blog helps you understand the identity <3!

#bi lesbiask #bi lesbian #explanation

[calypsohq]

► ( lalisa manoban & nonbinary ) according to the school’s records, calypso “cal” saetang is a 21-YEAR-OLD junior studying film, and they live over in gordon. they are a sagittarius, so that must be why others describe them as individualistic, honest, detached and regretful. when i see them, i’m reminded of old journals and diaries with chunks of writing scribbled out, film burning out in an old projector, the faint glow of a television screen late at night. ( gibby, 20, they/them, est ) ◄

andddd we’re on intro number two !!! i still don’t have my braincell but like pls take my bby calypso tyvm.

basics.

name: calypso saetang 

nicknames: cal

age: twenty one.

gender and pronouns: nonbinary, they/them.

sexual & romantic orientations: bisexual, biromantic, femme leaning.

major: film.

housing: gordon.

backstory.

trigger warnings: mental illness, death, death of a sibling, grief.

the eldest child of the saetang clan, when calypso was first born, everything the light touched was theirs. they were the shining star in their parents eyes, the single most important thing to exist in their life. cal was their princess, an invisible crown placed upon their head the moment they took their first breath, and they never really got to experience the true power that this held.

why didn’t they get to experience? well, it was simple. another baby came along only moments afterwards, a twin with eyes that shined just as bright as cal’s. they were two halves of the same whole, and for a brief moment, maybe they were equal.

it didn’t last, however. azalea was said to have been, “brilliant” by their doctors growing up, something calypso never showed signs of due to undiagnosed adhd, and immediately the two were different. while azalea excelled with starting to read eons above the level of her peers, calypso found themself with their head in the clouds, distanced from even many of their peers at school. 

with the taste of greatness on their tongue, the saetang’s weren’t satisfied with a prodigy for a daughter while their other child left away to rot. no, they wanted stars — two golden ones in their family, to bring them greatness. it starts simple: “calypso, you should be more like your sister,” and suddenly both children are found at odds with each other, a battle that calypso was never destined to win.

it wasn’t that calypso wasn’t capable - no, they were, but they weren’t like azalea. while she could dance and sing, they preferred to be behind the scenes, often dreaming up book and movie ideas and a life much different than their own that they’d scratch away into the depths of journals and diaries that could never meet the eyes of another. they weren’t the same.

this war, often fueled by their parents, started a war between sisters. everything cal could do, azalea could do better - a frustrating game of cat and mouse despite how hard cal would try. by the time the two got to high school, their relationship was irreparable - they shared nothing anymore other than their own face.

during their senior year of high school, the two were permanently split by the ways of nature as azalea passed away only weeks before their graduation. despite the two never being close, it seemed to hit calypso the hardest, who suddenly began to hide away in their bedroom. 

in fact, the only reason they left for haddon was to get away from it all - their old swingset in the backyard that hadn’t been touched in years, her old bedroom across the hall, the area where they carved their names into the windowsill in their bedroom, their parents, all of it.

this is SUCH a bad ending to this intro but like ba dum tss that’s where they are now !! they’re in film bc they’ve always been passionate about film and they wear their sister’s bracelet on their wrist always as their tribute to her! also don’t really talk to their parents anymore as they find themself harboring a lot of anger towards them for the rift they caused, but sometimes it’s just them trying to place blame on the lack of closeness the two had on someone other than themself.

study.

trigger warning: drugs mention.

if you say your favorite movie is by [ redacted bc i dont want anyone 2 be offended hello FDHJKFHAJK ] cal will kick you out of whatever room you are in with them. if you are outside, cal will kick you to the sun without any hesitation.

they’re quite opinionated which, is that for their own good or not? only time will tell. they never seem to be able to politely mask their disgust when someone says that they adore the newest adam sandler movie or that, god forbid, friends was funny ( no offense to anyone if u like that, pls know i adore u fdsjhdfhkj ). they can just be a bit pretentious at time, something they will swear they aren’t as they, “don’t care enough” to do such a thing. which, spoiler alert: they do care enough and if you are, unfortunately, someone they talk to, they will ramble to you about how pixar isn’t actually that good but dreamworks ruined itself trying to catch the high of shrek. 

they are... a complete pothead though and frankly if you ever need weed they are there for you

they get really philosophical about life and movies the higher they get though so you have to be prepared for some ramble about how everyone is a main character and that tik tok trend was wrong and this idea that some people are more important than others is exactly what capitalism wants you to think. 

they tend to be very detached tho - one of their biggest “fatal flaws.” they don’t usually give a fuck if they hurt you, not because they don’t care about you, their emotions just aren’t completely... there

consider them * linkin park vc * numb. 

they are very passionate abt hamsters too like they have one named saturn and you WILL see them put it in their pocket and take it to parties simply to go hide in the bathroom and play with it bc their priorities are clearly in check

honestly they just like rodents n probs want a chinchilla too which, valid

was an e-girl before being an e-girl was cool, basically just meaning they are emo. a valid emo, but still they’re quite emo. 

they were probs honestly interested in the school because of it’s dark history - the perfect setting and scene for a dark documentary on such a subject, or even a spooky place to shoot a movie. it’s kinda morbid and out of touch but hey, that’s calypso. 

they also think the minions are kinda cute so pls roast them 

wanted connections.

friends. — i just... i love platonic plots....

best friends. — hONESTLY it’d be really cute if there was a trio that was like, super super sweet bubbly cottage core girl, soft boy, and emo enby n so i am asking for that tyvm

enemies. — i can’t put frenemies down for them bc unfortunately cal is super quick to snip snip bUT LIKE ENEMIES ??? there’s a lot to do here, though frenemies might work if its like, used to be friends n now isn’t like idk listen my brain is gone

exes. — like ?? yea ??

other connections. — did u see my braincell leave ?? did u ?? reread n you’ll see the exact moment it left i swear 

#had:intro #mental illness tw #death tw #death of a sibling tw #grief tw #this isn't coherent n thats very on brand for me #* ✧ ˚ 𝐢. reflections . #drug use mention

[fatedfuturist]

things about my interpretation of tony stark. updated june 07, 2020.

here’s my exhaustive explanation for how i am not canon-compliant with the events and characterization of the mcu.

the reason for this is… well, there are several reasons, but i don’t want to stir shit up or just, in general, stomp on anyone else’s love for the mcu. and don’t get me wrong— i do love the mcu! but there are parts i’m critical of for personal reason, as we all have opinions on certain things. bc, yeah, you can love something, or someone, and still be logically critical about it or them.

anyway, here’s where my interpretation differs…

as per stated on my rules: i take inspiration for tony from multiple sources, including the mcu, marvel comics, the television show: avengers assemble, and my own personal headcanons. TONY IS ALSO ASIAN (SPECIFICALLY CHINESE) AMERICAN!!

i will admit that saying this isn’t particularly helpful if people don’t know, specifically, where i differ in terms of my interpretation of our dumbass genius. some of this info is scattered about on my blog, but here, it’s all consolidated into one post.

chen kun is my face claim, and i do use stuff from tony’s story from the mcu as a base. however, there are events and moments from the movies, that i selectively ignore due to personal preference; and then i build on top of my foundation with ideas, themes, and/or events from other sources such as the aforementioned sources listed above.

throwing this all under a read more because, like i said: exhaustive list. very. very. very fucking long. i’m serious– read at your own risk.

howard stark was an extremely abusive and absent father for all of tony’s childhood; tony did actively seek attention and approval from howard because he was rather aware of how famous he was and wanted the acceptance and validation from his dad; there wasn’t much shown in the mcu regarding his relationship with his father, but my inspiration for his father-son relationship comes from the comics;

an example of his verbal abuse: “you don’t want to be a sissy, now do you? stark men are made of iron!” (Iron Man, 1968);

an example of early exposure to alcohol: at age five, howard forced a drink into tony’s hand (which he did drink), stating that it would teach him “to be a man,” and that it’d “put hair on your chest” (Iron Man, 1968);

yes, this means that tony ‘forgiving’ howard in endgame is completely chucked out the window;

tony loses his parents the night of december 16, 1996 (not 12/16/1991), at the age of seventeen;

jarvis, the family butler, was more of a father to tony than howard ever was, and yes, this is why he names his first fully-functioning AI system jarvis;

tony was close with his mother, maria; she was his safehouse, and she taught him to be gentle and loving, and she also taught him the piano, which tony still periodically practices during his own time in private. in an avengers assemble episode, there is a piano in the tower that tony protects twice, which i reckon is because it has connections to his past with maria;

tony ain’t an old grandpa. i don’t see him being older than, like, 35–40 in the present time for my writing (chen kun is 44). this comes from comic and avengers assemble inspiration, which has been fairly ambiguous since they never mention his age. for plotting purposes in the mcu though, yes, he can be like 42–52 if needed.

tony is, by default, single unless otherwise stated. the reason for this is simply because i’m not big on tony / pepper in the mcu, and it’s not because i don’t like pepper (i love her as a character as an individual), but i just saw that the way they were written (so, this, yes, blames the mcu writers) was completely trash; they sort of redeemed it in endgame, but... in general, they had a lot of potential but then some writing choices pretty much ruined the ship for me;

this means that morgan does not exist unless otherwise specified and discussed, though i do enjoy the concert of tony being a dad to his own kid and breaking that cycle of howard’s shitty parenting;

i’m going to be as honest and transparent as i can: i do, for certain, love writing stevetony. they’re my primary ship. not simply in mcu dynamics, but from the comics and avengers assemble. however, like some can attest to, i will never force a ship on anyone. if you express no interest in them romantically? that’s fine. we can write them simply as good friends and comrades. i won’t stop writing or plotting with you if you don’t like them in a romantic dynamic. if you do like it that way? cool. i know it might be intimidating to discuss this given i look like complete trash for them, but i never choose who i will/will not write with based on whether we ship or not;

tony, publicly, hints toward being bisexual and biromantic a lot of the time as he’ll practically flirt with anyone at all times, but he never really openly admits it due to his oh-so ancient internalized homophobia (thank you for that one, howard and societal expectations of the time);

justin hammer is a long time rival in the industry, and often meddles with tony and his work all the time. it’s nothing new. the lack of foundation established in IM2 doesn’t provide much insight into their relationship. long story short (taken from avengers assemble): hammer is a punk bitch who’s jealous and tony is tired of him and will gladly beat his ass any day of the week whenever he drives a tank into his front door (which happens more often than not).

tony is fantastic with children. he loves getting to interact with children because he knows how excited they are to see him and/or iron man (seen in both the mcu and in the comics). this type of attention he’s okay about. if he can inspire children to do good things and be good people and be heroes in their own right, then he’s doing his job;

tony fosters the intelligence and dreams of bright individuals all the time by offering scholarships for high school graduates and post-secondary students, and also provides internship opportunities (equal opportunities regardless of race, sex, gender, religion, disability status, age, etc.)

we only see this occur with peter and harley in the mcu, but there are other kids— like riri williams! tony sees these kids for the bright minds that they have and he wants to help them and keep them safe as he knows these are the brains of the future.

let me run over iron man 3. like i said, i ignore some shit from the movies. tony doesn’t initiate the clean slate protocol, he doesn’t throw the arc reactor into the ocean, and he doesn’t remove the arc reactor from his chest. he will get surgery to get the shrapnel removed because if i were the follow the pain that comes with the comics, tony would literally be always on the verge of death at all times, requiring a chest plate to be recharged constantly to make sure the shrapnel doesn’t get closer– see? that’s a lot and i’m... lazy.

the reason for those choices are simple: clean slate protocol undoes his character progression;

the arc reactor is just a part of him as a person, stands as his heart;

avengers movie nights, (video/board) game nights, and training days exist and you will never be able to pry that out of my hands. tony always shows up fashionably late with coffee and pays for when shit gets broken by thor. team building exercises exist plenty within avengers assemble, including the fact that they share chores and decides who gets to do the next load of laundry from whoever chooses the short stick from the bunch.

tony has had anxiety and depression since he was a child. it just didn’t really flare up and get identified as a real, tangible mess of emotions and thoughts until he’d been kidnapped (and nearly died, at that). it got worse when he failed to address it until after IM3. into the present-day, tony deals with anxiety, depression, and PTSD all the time, but has improved (…sort of) when it comes to handling all of it, and certainly has grown to recognize similar symptoms in the people he cares about;

on another hand, tony has displayed symptoms of ADHD, but it’s not officially diagnosed, and some of these symptoms include, but are not limited to: hyperactivity (staying awake for days on end) and hyperfocus (hyper-focus on work), distractible (easily distracted when he’s not focused on something), rambling (talks a lot and often makes rather intuitive connections due to how busy his brain functions), impulsivity and recklessness (self explanatory), constant need to move around and/or do something (in meetings, he will be moving somehow, whether it’s tapping fingers or feet, or shifting around in his seat);

there are days where he feels inferior due to how human he knows he is (in comparison to most of his team), and other days, he feels as though he’s more machine than he is man. these feelings fluctuate depending on how he’s doing with his mental health, and/or if he hears and/or sees anything about him that points toward either idea;

there is always overwhelming guilt for those he can’t keep safe or people that die; tony doesn’t like to kill anybody (unless it’s robots, because… they’re robots, not human lives); though, if pushed far enough with no other choice, he will throw conventional morality out the window for the sake of protecting all that he believes to be for the good of the world;

tony isn’t jacked. he isn’t captain america fit, but he isn’t particularly thin, either. his body is sort of like a runner’s build (for visuals, refer to valerio schiti’s comic art of tony). i interpret tony’s body as a slight bit slimmer. he exercises, and being in the suit also is its own form of exercise. god forbid we discuss his eating habits, though. and–– he also isn’t short short, but he isn’t tall, either. he sits at 5’10”, which might be a little below the average male, but that’s about it.

speaking of eating habits, simply put: tony can’t cook for shit and that’s it. he’ll try to cook for his significant others’ on the occasion, but he can’t be blamed if he burns everything.

tony isn’t ‘woke’ or perfect, as it’s imperative to remember he grew up as rich and with financial and some social class privilege (since he was rich), despite the abuse and harassment he experienced during his youth. it’s taken him time to recognize this, and he realizes it really doesn’t cost anything to be a better person, which is why he tries to be better when it comes to his tone of voice when discussing certain topics he has no authority to be speaking of, and by taking action with simple manual labour when it comes to chores (so he doesn’t hire other people to do shit for him). he also knows he can’t be a man of ‘all bark and no bite’ when it comes to supporting people and causes, hence why he actively advocates for female and youth empowerment through both words and actions.

in regards to ca:cw events, i would prefer to ignore them. for specific-plotting purposes, this can be dropped, but i prefer the events of avengers assemble when it comes to ‘civil war’. it’s actually really simple:

tony was not honest about his intentions with the team regarding a robot that was initially made for him by howard, which ended up with an ultron reboot that nearly risked loads of civilian lives and the team’s lives;

steve confronted tony about it when they returned back to avengers tower. with tony’s insistence that everything was now fine, steve decided to resign due to tony’s dishonesty and lack of trust in the team;

this splits the team in half, where steve takes— well, they decided to leave since they didn't like tony's lack of honesty— natasha, the hulk, and the falcon to work under SHIELD as the ‘secret avengers,’ and tony, clint, and thor remain as leftover avengers (later with the addition of ant-man and temporarily, spider-man, in some missions);

in the end, they all join back together after learning to appreciate their differences and reconciling under the fact that there wouldn’t be any more secrets that could risk the world, and the team’s safety;

if i am to follow the events of the mcu— between ca:cw and infinity war, he develops nanotech for his armour, which is embedded into his very skin to accommodate for nanobots, which interacts via neural transmissions (visuals here);

tony recognizes that he lost his temper and let his emotions get to him in the moment, which fucked up shit that could’ve been talked through and fixed;

tony is an alcoholic. he recognizes that he always will be, though he’s always working toward sobriety. he certainly relapses every so often when things are rough and he feels as if he has no other options, but he’s aware that relapsing is part of the process of recovery. he has attended AA meetings (alcoholics anonymous), and has been AA sponsors for people in the past;

to skim through the events of infinity war and endgame should these be part of the things you’re curious about (this is getting really long and i’m sure you’re tired of reading this—how have you gotten this far?):

after returning from space, tony took a few months (~ five) to recover from those three months of malnutrition, dehydration, and the wound of thanos’ stab. tony sealed the front of his injury, but he sure as hell wasn’t seen dealing with the back end. during this time, he’s able to regain some muscle mass;

he lives on his own, retreating to the cabin to escape from the responsibilities of being a fallen hero who ultimately failed the people he was supposed to protect.

during the five year gap, he keeps in contact with the other avengers, but very rarely. they’re the only ones who know where he lives;

like i said— tony does not say any of that forgiving bullcrap to howard. victims of abuse don’t have to forgive their abuser, parent or not. let’s just imagine the entire interaction didn’t happen at all;

tony doesn’t die;

he used the infinity stones; but, to maintain consistency with what the mcu established w/ thanos: he sustained significant damage to his right arm, up to the shoulder and neck. it’s gravely scarred. the overall function of that arm also diminished greatly. vision out of his right eye is not as sharp as it once was, either;

a year of recovery and physiotherapy later, tony decides to amputate and go for a prosthetic. he works with shuri and wakandan tech to build an arm;

despite the end of the looming, world-ending thread, tony still battles resurfacing trauma. not every day is happy, but he is working toward recovery. there are days he doesn’t remember chunks of what happened due to the power of the infinity stones; sometimes, he doesn’t even want to remember it, anyway;

tony retires. sort of. for the most part. if the world really needs iron man, he’ll be there;

tony may have handed CEO-ship to pepper, but he still handles a lot of work for stark industries, and that’s what he primarily does post-endgame.

the multiverse and realm-traveling happens a-fucking-lot 

#✧ i just want to feel like i’m still living. ≻ headcanon. #well fuck this took over an hour #and now i need to go to bed lmAOOOO #the formatting seems a bit whack bc i just copied and pasted it from my notes #but oh well #MFDSJHFDJSDFS #fuck this got long #long post // #tw: long post

[cordclias]

hey  baybees  !  i’m  maya  and  in  true  me  fashion  ,  i  am  late  bc  i  was  taking  a  nap  !  delia’s  a  new  muse  of  mine  so  excuse  me  for  being  a  whole  disorganized  mess  while  i  try  to  figure  her  out  🤙   i’ve  never  played  a  chara  like  this  so  i’m  tryna  dig  deep  into  myself  to  find  the  inner  asshole  that  i  know  is  there  ,  so  hopefully  i  do  a  good  job  and  make  ron  swanson  proud  !  also  i’m  the  biggest  hoe  for  plots  ,  i’ve  got  a  lil  plots  page  here  for  ideas  (  yes  it’s  very  basic  )  so  give  this  a  like  and  i’ll  hit  you  up  !

victoria pedretti. cisfemale. she/her. one. * / oh , i just saw cordelia d’amato coming out of apt. #1906 if you were looking for them! the twenty-three year old is a radio dj and i heard they’re a sagittarius which makes total sense. if you can’t find their room , just listen for dead of night by orville peck ; i heard they’re obsessed. \ * maya. 22. she/her. est 

STATISTICS  .

NAME :  cordelia  margaret  d’amato

NICKNAMES :   delia  ,  dee  ,  cory

AGE :  twenty - three

DATE  OF  BIRTH:  december 3rd ,  1996

ZODIAC :   sagittarius  

PLACE  OF  BIRTH / HOMETOWN :  queens  ,  new  york 

GENDER :  cisfemale

PRONOUNS :  she / her

ORIENTATION : bisexual / biromantic 

PARENTS :  nathan  d’amato  &  rosalie  scott

SIBLINGS :  vincent  d’amato

CAREER :  radio  dj

PHYSICAL  TRAITS :  straight  long  hair  constantly  bouncing  between  blonde  and  brunette,  gray  -  blue  eyes  ,  slim  build  ,  5′4″   

TRAITS :  chaotic  ,  apathetic  ,  charming  ,  impulsive  ,  confident  ,  loyal  ,  tempestuous  ,  entertaining  ,  perceptive  ,  clever  ,  witty  ,  sharp  ,  adaptable  ,  capricious

MUSE  PARALLELS  :  kathryn  merteuil  (  cruel  intentions  )  ,  jennifer  check  (  jennifer’s  body  )  ,  nick  miller  (  new  girl  )  ,  theo  crain  (  haunting  of  hill  house  )  ,  madison  montgomery  (  ahs  :  coven  )  ,  ron  swanson  &  april  ludgate (  parks  &  rec  )

BACKGROUND  .

cordelia  was  born  into  a  tumultuous  and  poor  nyc  family  --  her  dad  a  construction  worker  and  her  mom  a  hair  stylist

and  the  shortage  of  money  didn’t  help  with  her  dad’s  temper  ,  his  fiery  personality  causing  a  lot  of  problems  for  the  d’amatos  since  the  beginning

he  wasn’t  abusive  ,  just  loud  and  commanding  and  scary  ,  and  her  mom  was  more  invested  in  finishing  off  her  wine  bottles  than  parenting  ,  which  led  to  a  very  stressful  household  for  delia  and  her  brother

three  years  older  than  her  ,  delia’s  brother  took  it  upon  himself  to  take  the  brunt  of  their  dad’s  anger  ,  and  with  their  dad’s  attention  taken  away  ,  delia  was  largely  ignored  for  her  childhood

the  only  time  she  and  her  brother  felt  safe  in  their  shabby  little  apartment  was  when  they  were  in  his  room  listening  to  music  .  it  was  his  mission  to  teach  her  all  the  classics  :  metallica  ,  ac/dc  ,  led  zeppelin  ,  pink  floyd  ,  etc  .  

her  love  of  music  came  from  her  brother  ,  and  because  of  him  she  learned  how  to  play  the  guitar  ,  drums  ,  piano  ,  and  bass  all  before  she  was  18

her  brother  didn’t  have  the  grades  or  athletic  talent  for  a  scholarship  so  he  went  straight  into  the  work  force  after  graduating  high  school  ,  and  when  he  was  able  to  afford  a  one  bedroom  apartment  ,  little  16  year  old  delia  moved  out  of  her  parent’s  house  and  made  his  couch  her  new  bedroom

delia  also  decided  to  skip  the  college route  and  immediately  got  a  shitty  waitress  job  along  with  an  internship  at  the  radio  station  when  she  was  18

she  moved  into  the  flats  once  she  was  sure  she  could  afford  it  ,  but  she  picked  an  apartment  with  a  roommate  just  because  she  has  never  lived  alone  and  doesn’t  know  how  she  would  handle  it

it  took  a  few  years  and  a  lot  of  perseverance  ,  but  at  the  age  of  21  she  officially  became  a  radio  dj  on  an  alternative  station  and  somehow  managed  to  become  one  of  the  listener's  favorites  ,  probably  because  she  finds  the  most  random  topics  to  rant  about  and  has  no  filter  whatsoever

and  after  every  paycheck  ,  whatever  extra  money  she  has  goes  to  helping  her  brother  get  through  art  school

PERSONALITY  .

so  i  know  her  character  inspos  aren’t  the  best  of  people  ,  but  i  promise  delia  isn’t  just  some  mean  bitch  character  ,  she  just  has  some  mean  bitch  qualities

like  she’s  very  blunt  and  pretty  apathetic  at  times  ,  totally  the  type  to  sleep  with  someone’s  bf  and  not  feel  bad  about  it  ,  and  has  definitely  done  some  illegal  stuff  just  because  she  feels  like  it

her  parents  ignored  her  ,  she  acted  out  ,  the  usual

i  hc  that  she  spent  most  of  her  high  school  years  hanging  around  with  the  “  bad  crowd  ”  and  subsequently  learned  how  to  hotwire  cars  and  pickpocket  

she’s  also  very  impulsive  and  reckless  --  for  as  smart  as  she  is  ,  she  does  a  lot  of  dumb  shit  

unlike  some  of  her  character  inspos  ,  she  isn’t  into  material  shit  and  honestly  wears  the  same  pair  of  jeans  every  day  and  most  of  her  shirts  are  band  t’s  that  are  hand  me  downs  from  her  brother

she  is  very  charming  when  she  wants  to  be  ,  usually  when  she  wants  something  ,  but  she  doesn’t  just  go  around  manipulating  people

she  just  isn’t  a  people  person  so  tbh  she  doesn’t  try  to  be  nice  unless  she  has  to  be

she  believes  that  honesty  is  the  best  policy  ,  even  if  it’s  gonna  hurt  someone’s  feelings  ,  which  is  why  she  is  the  way  that  she  is

but  she’s  a  surprisingly  great  friend  ,  like  she’s  loyal  as  hell  ,  will  definitely  help  you  hide  a  dead  body  ,  and  since  she  doesn’t  care  about  money  she’s  the  type  to  book  an  impromptu  vacation  on  her  dime  and  take  along  her  besties

she’s  100%  not  a  talk  behind  your  back  regina  george  type  of  friend  ,  this  bitch  will  go  to  war  for  the  ppl  she  cares  about

she  does  have  a  temper  but  it’s  one  of  those  things  where  she  doesn’t  show  she’s  pissed  until  you  think  she’s  forgotten  about  it  and  have  your  guard  down  .  like  i  imagine  that  she  was  bullied  by  some  girl  in  high  school  and  then  in  the  yearbook  there  were  pics  of  this  girl  making  out  with  a  teacher  or  smth

she’s  got  a  very  dry  and  sarcastic  sense  of  humor  ,  like  it’s  hard  to  tell  if  she’s  joking  or  if  she’s  being  serious  .  honestly  most  of  the  time  you  should  just  assume  she’s  joking  unless  she’s  actually  mad  or  smth  ,  which  is  also  why  she  seems  like  a  dick  most  of  the  time

so  ...  you  don’t  wanna  be  on  her  bad  side  ig  ??

okay  that’s  all  i’ve  got  !   ik  this  is  crazy  long  and  i’m  super  sorry  for  that  ,  idk  where  all  this  muse  came  from  but  i  am  hella  excited  to  play  this  asshole  ,  idk  what  that  says  about  me  .  😈  also  if  u  don’t  like  messaging  on  tumblr  ,  pls  hit  me  up  on  discord  @ 𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒂𝒚𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒂𝒊𝒔𝒆 𝒂𝒏 𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕#6396  !

#( ❛ 𝒅𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒂 𝒅'𝒂𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒐 | OOC . ) #flats.intro

[dawningfairytale]

bc i was inspired by the @june-doe-event here are my thoughts on the rtc queer identities (spoiler: none of them are straight)

ocean: so she’s definitely ace. but like, there is sabm but i choose to believe that was a one-off. i don’t believe she’s attracted to men, but i have a hard time choosing between aromantic ocean and lesbian ocean. to which i go in my little bisexual way, Why Not Both? i think she’s not romance repulsed but doesn’t experience romantic attraction. she’s probably cis, but also i’d believe it if she were actively running from any potential gender crises. her sexuality crisis took enough out of her. give her a breather and come back next pride month.

noel: canonically gay. definitely (hc-wise) uses he with the occasional she because. but i don’t know if that’s in like a bigender way or just a vibes way. he knew he was gay for a long time, and using she probably just sprung up on her. i’m leaning towards bigender tho.

mischa: the bisexualest man of all times. more bisexual than misha collins. i- this isn’t canon, but isn’t it tho? evidence: noel’s lament and talia. i think that kiss Awoke Something In Him and he went “oh fuck i’m not straight uhhhh quick let’s sing about women in a rapper way and a woman in a love way so they can’t tell”. but noel knows. noel gruber fucking knows. also polyamorous because he has two hands for noel and talia. i support transmasc mischa but i also support raging trans ally mischa.

ricky: i normally say bi, but i have many bisexuals, i like omni for ricky. it feels right. i’m honestly considering arospec in some manner but i really don’t know. also:not cis. i respect transmasc ricky, love it’s believers, but i love transfem ricky, pronouns they/she +. you *csn* use he, but you have to use five different sets of neo pronouns in the conversation to earn that. i think i still use just they/them mainly in posts as to not invalidate transmasc ricky believers.

jane doe: depends on how you perceive gender and sexuality.

penny: pan. totally. pan penny until i die. perhaps pansexual homo romantic?? i think she doesn’t wanna label her gender, but it’s not fully cis. does use it/it’s semi-frequently.

constance: *hits her with my bisexualification ray*. i need her to be bi for me and my needs and that’s what she is in this post. i do ship blackrose, no i am not okay. i do also think she has some form of split attraction. like, biromantic no doubt. possibly demisexual?? definitely either demi or ace towards guys. gals and enbies, she could be homosexual or demisexual (or ace if you wanna). i believe she had a lot of motivations for That Thing. i’ve seen a decent amount of demigirl constance, stunning, but also fierce (in this case trans) ally constance. yeah i think they’re a demigirl. i like that flag for her.

bonus

karnak: nb achillean

virgil: gay man (male rat)

talia: *hits her with my bisexualification ray*

#sexuality headcanons #rtc #ride the cyclone

[gltrngold-a]

—  ♥　♡　♥　THE AFFLUENT   ♥　♡　♥  —

“A house with a death in it can never again be bought or sold by the living. It can only be borrowed by the ghosts who have stayed behind.”

                             — i am the pretty thing that lives in the house (2016, dir. oz perkins)

｢ keira knightley. thirty. female. she/her. ｣ welcome to cerulean pier, home of many mythological beings. did you know that our resident CAPRICE DE LUCA is the child of PERSEPHONE? they don’t, maybe that’s why they’re known as the AFFLUENT around town. they are GENTLE & SOLICITOUS, but also SENSITIVE & PLIANT. they are also currently A WRITER. don’t say anything, but they are hiding THAT SHE WAS NEVER SUPPOSED TO INHERIT HER GRAND FAMILY FORTUNE. ｢ shannon, 20, she/her, bst. ｣

—  ♥　♡　♥　basics  ♥　♡　♥  —

name: caprice alessia de luca age: thirty birthdate: 26th september, 1989 — milan, lombardy, italy zodiac ( sun ) sign: libra orientations: bisexual, biromantic relationship status: single label: the affluent occupation: writer

faceclaim: keira knightley height: 5 ft 8 in

—  ♥　♡　♥　personality  ♥　♡　♥  — 

mbti: infp-t enneagram: two, with a one wing hogwarts house: ravenclaw temperament: melancholic theme song: rabbit heart (raise it up) by florence + the machine

hobbies: tending to the gardens at the front of her house; volunteering at the local library; cooking / baking; language-learning; playing the harp

—  ♥　♡　♥　favourites  ♥　♡　♥  —

songs:

i’d do anything for love (but i won’t do that) by meat loaf come as you are by nirvana a rush of blood to the head by coldplay

television series:

the good place (2016-2020) medici: masters of florence (2016-2019) pride and prejudice (1995)

books:

rebecca (daphne du maurier, 1938) frankenstein (mary shelley, 1818) howards end (e.m. forster, 1910)

films: 

i am the pretty thing that lives in the house (2016) rebecca (1940) a streetcar named desire (1951)

—  ♥　♡　♥　summary   ♥　♡　♥  —

so here’s the hoe-down throwdown about my baby capri:

eclectic. if it can keep her interest she’ll love it.

many bookshelves and annotated copies of books and the first editions that she’s never written in so she has more than one copy of every book and polished desks and half-full notebooks and cups of tea she forgot about and flowers from her garden that just seem to live a little longer than they might otherwise though she can never work out why.

accidentally ethereal and vague sometimes but if you need specifics please ask her she’s trying. 

always trying to learn something new! educate urselves! but sometimes she just doesn’t have the patience and that’s okay too ( she gave up on learning woodworking, for one. the splinters weren’t good for her hands. )

so passionate when you get to know her okay. 

degrees in pride of place above the fire. silk pyjamas.

quietly intellectual. soft bean. literally the duck with knife meme because she protective but just because she could cut a bitch with her jawline doesn’t mean she’s going to.

spiritually the village wise old woman even though she’s literally thirty. automatically everyone’s mother she has adopted everyone i do not make the rules. you’re hungry? you want tea? you need help? need someone to talk to? go to caprice’s she’ll never snake you out.

if you live in the town she automatically cares about u that’s just how it is she is concerned about everyone always except herself she actually do be kinda self-hating tho my baby :(

she won’t seek you out because she prefers to keep to quiet places but you can find her at her house, in her gardens, or in the library she likes to volunteer at! 

you know that house everyone goes past and they’re like, ‘if i had the money i’d live in that house’? she lives in that house. it’s a bit like the tallis house in atonement with the view of jocelyn’s home in broadchurch. really pretty, relic from times past, unmatched view of the sea, everyone wants it. carefully looked-over gardens, a swing-seat where she sits and reads. you get me, it’s just... so pretty.

really sweet accent. like, italian accents are pretty and i’m a lesbian so i’ve gotta say it here you know.

so basically her getting her ( fake ) family’s fortune was one big ol’ mistake. her mother wasn’t of sound mind when she changed the will but someone didn’t check properly so guess she’s got it now. think murdoch media, grovesnor group, that kind of collective; conservative assholes and caprice de luca is not one jot like any of them. 

she just wants to write her books and help out as much as she can god bless her she’s such a sweetheart. ( she writes historical fiction and you’ve never met someone more cautious about accuracy. her one exception is medici masters of florence but we’re not having no philippa gregory in this bitch. elizabeth of york didn’t fuck richard iii thank you for your time. )

it was a difficult decision for her not to come clean abt the whole situation because she felt bad about taking advantage, but it meant she could really help people with the insane amount of money she came to have! she doesn’t flaunt it, and if it wasn’t for the last name most people probably wouldn’t even know she had it. 

she tried going to law school like her parents but she just couldn’t get into it. she’d rather pay for people’s legal advice rather than do it herself and not be any good at it! 

that’s particularly true of the winter though she can never really work out why.

hopeless romantic!1!1! even tho she’s been burned in love before like she’s a daydreaming sweetheart please protect her sweet lil bby

she’s the kind of person you feel spiritually should’ve belonged to the renaissance. just that sense of displacement that lingers around a person, and you wonder, just for a moment, if they’d have been happier. of course, it’s a futile thing to wonder, because we’re born and we die as it happens.

honestly she’s baby but so easily manipulated. like make her feel bad and she’ll bend over backwards to make u feel better... someone please give her a new backbone.

please... be gentle with my child.

—  ♥　♡　♥　wanted connections   ♥　♡　♥  — 

someone she tutors maybe? like she’s a smart little bean.

do your character’s actual fake parents suck? well then you can live at caprice’s house now. i don’t make the rules she does.

someone who’s taking advantage of the sweet but absolutely loaded bean for her money.

people who like her books because tell her you do and she’ll cry out of happiness and it’s the softest thing ever.

people she’s helped out with money for tuition etc. who are now friends with her and go visit to make sure the introverted smol is okay! like give her soft friends please.

ik she’s like the oldest person here right now but. hopefully at some point someone give her a soft partner. she’s a soft bi so anyone works.

a de luca relative who’s salty about the family inheritance??? conservative, entitled, still rich enough, pushy and trying to make her life a misery bc they hate everything she stands for 

#gods:intro

[drmazel]

knifebi replied to your post: the “split attraction” model is...

ngl i think that concept developing here is directly responsible for at least 1/3 of the discourse

honestly i really think so too like it’s led so many naive people (myself included, back when I was 18, so I’ll use myself as an example here) to think like “hmm i theoretically feel attraction to anyone but 1) i am shy and socially awkward and stressed and busy and have no interest in having a relationship so i must be aromantic, and 2) i don’t wanna drop my pants at the sight of every stranger I encounter, so I must be asexual and it’s like nah bro ur bi you’re just Shy and also Normal (as in just the average person, no disrespect to people with high sex drives)

like i do recognize asexuality is a thing and i still Do identify with it to sooooome degree but it’s like.... i’m not gonna tell someone they’re not what they say they are, that’s not cool. but people really need to stop perpetuating lies and misunderstandings bc it’s confusing people and it’s Wrong. 

and AGAIN i was using myself as a specific example the point of this is not to rag on ace people at all, that was just my personal experience with the split attraction bullshit confusing the shit out of me when i left a conservative and homophobic environment with no exposure to lgbt history. this bullshit has also led to people genuinely saying “straight lesbians” or “homoromantic bisexuals” exist and it’s just like. i don’t think you know what those words mean. it’s not split attraction, it’s homophobia being HEAVILY interweaved into our society making our relationships with our orientations far more complex than people are willing to admit. 

like i’m not a biromantic heterosexual or something. i’m a bisexual person that is Very apprehensive of ever being in an open relationship with a woman because I know my family would not be accepting. and i’m not a actually lesbian willing to settle for relationship with a man because of my homophobic family. i’m just a bisexual person that has made the choice to not come out yet. that’s it.

and that’s not getting into the history of why the misunderstanding of this model is just wrong. i’m not going into that. i’m tired. ugh.

#knifebi #this is a Lot but it's like so much discourse about this implies this is what mogai people think my situation is and it's like #please mind your business and stop confusing questioning people

[the-meme-courier]

Wow your bio are actually brave one, even though I disagree with you but I like that you aren’t afraid to tell you opinion about things that people will often hate on you because of it, I wish I wasn’t afraid to speak my opinion about stuff people often have a different opinion about it, but I am curious about the ace part why do you think it’s not lgbt also about the pansexual I also want to know why if you don’t mind bc as a bi I sometimes wonder about pansexual in a bad way too.

Thank you! It took me a very, verrrrry long time to be comfortable publicly disagreeing with people (even now I choose to just keep my mouth shut sometimes), but I'm glad someone likes that lmao.

I don't think that asexual/aromantic people are inherently LGBT because they could still be cisgender/heterosexual. If a person (for example) was biromantic and asexual, I think they should be considered LGBT, or even if they were just transsexual/heteroromantic but still ace, I think that'd be LGBT too. I just think it's the L, G, B, or T part that makes them LGBT though, not the asexuality.

I don't agree with the term "pansexual" (although I'm not rude about it, my best friend uses the label and we get along just fine!) because it's imo biphobic as well as transphobic. I say that because every pansexual I've spoken with has defined it as "I like men, women, and trans people" and, to me, that's incredibly transphobic bc it's saying trans people are separate, when we should in fact just be treated like everyone else-- men and women. It's a biphobic term because it's saying bisexuals only date cis people, which isn't usually accurate. That's like making a new term for gay men/lesbian women who will date trans people, they're still just gay/lesbian. I don't see why it's a different story for bisexuals

#pansexual discourse #asexual discourse #anon #asks #personal

[canallynwrite]

I bring asks: 2, 4, 7, 12, 13, 17, 26, 29, 30

thank you!

2 - HOW DID YOU DISCOVER YOUR SEXUALITY? TELL YOUR STORY.

for context: i’m biromantic asexual!

i was one of those kids who didn’t even know that it was actually possible to like girls as well as guys, so i only really discovered the lgbt+ community after i entered middle school and got access to the internet. the first time i actually thought about being anything other than straight was when my friend came out to me as bisexual. now, my first (or second, whatever) thought was: “does she like me?”

and nobody wants to be the person who thinks their not-straight friend of the same gender is into them just bc said not-straight friend came out to them, so after doing some research i did some self-reflection and realized my actual feelings were more akin to something like: “i hope she likes me.”

for the rest of the year i tried to convince myself that she was the exception to my straightness and was definitely not crushing hard on her. then at the end of the year i started dating someone who, after we dated for a week or so, came out as a trans dude, and i sort of just accepted my bisexuality. the last bit probably doesn’t make sense, but he was in the middle of figuring out his gender, so for a while he identified as a gal and that was when i first really acknowledged that yes, i am indeed very not straight. him coming out as trans just hammered my bi-ness. looking back on it, there were many signs that i was not straight at all. i just had zero language for my feelings!

my asexuality was just always there, tbh. i found out about asexuality after i accepted my bi-ness so as soon as i learned what it meant i just went ‘yah, that’s me. i’m ace.’

4 - WHO WAS THE FIRST PERSON YOU TOLD? HOW DID THEY REACT?

uhhh, apart from the dude i was dating, probably the aforementioned friend who’d come out to me as bi. she was really happy for me and we celebrated my first coming out experience together!

7 - WHAT IS ONE QUESTION YOU HATE BEING ASKED ABOUT YOUR SEXUALITY?

i try not to get mad at ppl asking questions, bc i know that it is Quite Possible to not know much about sexuality (for the longest time i didn’t know ANYTHING) but biphobic and acephobic questions in general really get my goat. yes, asexuality is a thing that exists; no, i’m not going to cheat on my partner just bc i’m bi.

12 - WHAT’S THE STUPIDEST THING YOU’VE HEARD SAID ABOUT THE LGBT+ COMMUNITY?

tbh, any time a straight person starts talking about the lgbt+ community like they know everything about it and are Great Allies i have to roll my eyes. jordan, you’re straight as uncooked spaghetti and cisgender, please stop pretending your opinions have any authority here just bc you read a few articles on gender/sexual fluidity and have a gay friend or two. 

but, on a more well-known note, the stupidest thing i’ve heard would definitely have to be anything that those assholes who claim that the lgbt+ community includes pedophiles have ever said. that idea is both stupid and enraging.

13 - WHAT’S YOUR FAVOURITE THING ABOUT THE LGBT+ COMMUNITY AS A WHOLE?

i’ve seen lgbt+ people say a lot of stupid shit, even against other sexualities (especially against asexuality), but as a whole the lgbt+ community is extremely accepting and seems to have so many little niche corners for every possible interest or hobby. like, u want lgbt+ writers??? u got it, pal. a group lgbt+ athletes??? u may have to look a little harder than for the lgbt+ writers but damn, they’re there! blogs about lgbt+ animals in nature??? yes, that does exist!

it’s such a large community, filled with so many different types of people, which is what i love about it!

17 - HAVE YOU BEEN IN A RELATIONSHIP? IF SO, HOW DID YOU MEET?

i’ve been in two! and am currently in,,,, something? it’s a little complicated. we both know we like each other (and i wish we were dating!) but we haven’t “””officially””” decided to go out. 

the other two were a) some dude i broke up with after two days lmao; we won’t talk about him, and b) the dude i talked about earlier! we met on a roleplaying forum for ppl in our area when we were younger and really hit it off. i asked him out two or three months after we met, and we were together for about six months before going off ‘n on. we “””officially””” broke up after a year or so bc he needed some time to himself for his mental health.

26 - WHAT IDENTITY ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE YOUR YOUNGER SELF?

well, for pre-middle-school me i’d sit her down and give her an hour long lecture on the lgbt+ community and recommend her some books w/ lgbt+ characters. she doesn’t know that being bi is possible so i’d also pull up an irl bi person as an example. for questioning!me, i think i’d just advise her not too push to hard against the idea of being bi. if you continue to like girls (and you will) then that’s okay and not something to tear yourself up about.

29 - WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WISH PEOPLE KNEW ABOUT BEING LGBT+?

a) we are, in fact, a very wide spectrum of individuals, and stereotyping irl people does not help anything. being interested in women does not make me super butch; it makes me, me.

b) being lgbt+ is most certainly not all peaches and if you act like it is then you are Very Wrong Indeed, my friend. tbh, i don’t have much for this point besides complaining about that one straight person who called themselves an ally but still tried to police who i came out to and implied that if i wasn’t okay with having my sexuality shouted out to the world in the middle of a crowded cafeteria then i must be repressing myself. so, yeah, don’t be like that person, kids.

30 - WHY ARE YOU PROUD TO BE LGBT+?

how persistent lgbt+ people - of the past and present - are. throughout every age and every culture, no matter if lgbt+ ppl are oppressed or accepted, you will find lgbt+ people. some are harder to find, because of hate towards people like them, but look hard enough and you will find them. even when lgbt+ people were persecuted, they were there. even in places where they could still be put to death today, they’re there, and they’re fighting.

the pink triangle was what nazis marked gay men with in concentration camps, but lgbt+ people, most notably the AIDS movement, have reclaimed it, taken it back and turned it into a positive symbol for lgbt+ people.

and that is why i’m proud to be lgbt+. to stand with these people is an absolute honor.

#lgbt+ #biromantic asexual #queer-coding #the pink triangle #pride month #ask me stuff! #asks #alessia-writes #tw: queer #my thoughts #yikes i wrote a lot #lgbt+ pride #well #have fun reading! #lgbt+ asks

[mimikyustims]

here’s a uh... pride stimboard for myself. i made a flag i guess?? it’s supposed to be demiheterosexual biromantic. which right away sounds uh, really stupid/cringey to most people.

explanation under cut + creds in captions

so i’m demiheterosexual, meaning i only experience sexual attraction to the opposite sex once a strong connection is formed. like it can take months, even over a year. and it’s not a conscious choice. i can date someone for an entire year and not feel any sexual attraction to them just bc the connection isn’t strong enough. i’m also biromantic meaning i’m romantically attracted to both sexes.

people always tell me i’m just a straight girl looking for attention, or a bi girl with internalized homophobia, or some other stupid stuff. except i’m not. i’ve been with both sexes before. i’ve been sexual with girls before and didn’t enjoy it. it made me very uncomfortable and anxious. i grew up online with safe lgbt communities so i know for a fact it’s not internalized homophobia. like, i literally identified as a lesbian for a whole year when i was like twelve. and i’m not asexual because i like guys sexually, just not girls. but i still like to date girls, just not have sex with them. out of all the people i’ve dated, i’ve only ever dated one guy, actually.

people, complete strangers, laugh at me and demean me and demand my entire life story + sex life details to determine whether i’m valid or not. and to them i say fuck you because it’s not your business. and considering that if i’m dating a girl i’ll be seen as a lesbian regardless of my sexuality, why does it matter? romantic orientation is what matters, not sexual. the only person who’s going to know my sexual orientation is the person i’m dating. it. doesn’t. fucking. matter.

anyway, i don’t feel comfortable in the straight community because yknow im not straight. i dont feel comfortable in the gay community because they call me a fake and a nasty cishetty + im not gay. i dont feel comfortable in the bi community because they tell me to “go eat a pussy or get my flag off your profile” (actual words said to me by a r*df*m lmao), and i don’t feel fully comfortable in the ace community because i’m not asexual, i’m demisexual, and i’m still attracted (sexually) to guys.

i’ve been told no girl would ever date me if i don’t want to “fuck them” (even though i have done such things with girls before), and then i was called a pillow princess who nobody would ever fuck bc i’d be boring even tho hilariously enough i prefer giving over receiving. i’ve been told that i’m unwanted and that i should go back to the straighties, i’ve been harassed by adults to tell them my sex life so they can deem me valid or not, i’ve been told i should break up with my boyfriend (who’s trans, so pre-op afab) because i’m not good enough for him and he’s probably unhappy with me. and much more lmao

oh and then of course there’s the whole “straight people are gross and should die lol” shit all over tumblr that makes me want to die even more as someone who’s already depressed and suicidal. i’m not straight and i used to call myself bisexual until i got hate for it, so i changed, then changed again cause hate, and the cycle continues. but if i prefer guys then i practically am straight and should die huh?

so uh yeah i don’t care if you support me but i do care if you’re an asshole, thanks bye

#my post #stimboard #lgbt #pride #bisexual #demisexual #heterosexual #biromantic #stim #stimmy #stimming #sensory #asmr #lgbta #black #pink #blue #purple #slime #gems #food #sweets #dessert #cupcake #frosting #sprinkles #butter slime #geometry #pyramid #kinetic sand