#HOW DID I END UP HERE

[shotmrmiller]

cbf!simon or price and widow reader. He doesn’t know how to comfort her after she lost her husband and was left alone to raise their little girl, but he does know he’s going to die trying.

i'll use Price because he makes me insane. He's older than you by a bit, so it never felt right for him to pursue you, even though he never missed the looks you gave him when you thought he wasn't paying attention.

he doesn't know what it's like to lose a partner, nor does he even want to know. But what he does know is you.

both of you were essentially raised together, so when he finds out about the terrible news, he's already knocking on your front door. he doesn't say anything when you open the door, just takes you in his arms.

he maneuvers you towards the couch, and holds your small hand in his, as you cry. the baby cries in the other room, and he pats your thigh.

I've got it, love. Take your time.

his heavy boots thud as he walks towards the nursery, and in a couple of minutes, the house is silent again. john comes out to the living room, and your little baby is fisting his facial hair— he doesn't seem to care at all.

john just coos at the baby, not even flinching when she pulls a few hairs from the root.

the image is gut-wrenching because, may your late husband forgive you, but this was what you had wanted— you've loved john since you were both kids.

of course, things never seem to go your way. not with john, and now, with your late husband.

wiping your tears with the palms of your hands, you approach john with your arms extended toward your baby.

thank you for passing by, john. i'm not alright but i will be, soon enough. i'll take her, i'm sure you have better things to do than be here with me.

he doesn't give you the baby. his face is stern, sky-blue eyes hardened as he gazes at you.

is he mad?

his jaw clenches as he exhales loudly.

he's mad.

john shakes his head and scratches the back of his head with one hand.

i've known you for most of your life. you've never held your tongue back on me before, so don't start now. you don't want me here? then say that. otherwise, go wash up. i'll watch the baby.

his eyes soften when he sees your eyes glisten, and he pulls you in with his free arm, pressing a prickly kiss to your forehead.

i'm sorry, sweetheart. truly. but i'm here for you, whatever you need.

he doesn't go home that night. nor that week. nor the one after that. he goes to work and comes home to you. your heart is in turmoil, torn between grieving for your late husband and adjusting to the presence of another man in your life.

it all comes to head one day, when john answers to your baby's call.

dada.

you talk to him when she's put down to a nap. well, yell at him, more like.

what are you doing here? really? don't you have a wife somewhere? a family? are you here out of some sense of duty? guilt? you don't need to be here, taking care of a baby that isn't yours, john.

he lets you rant, get it all off your chest. once you finish, he pulls you in for a hug, and tells you that no, that little girl might not be his biologically, but she could be his in every other way. just like you could be.

you harshly push him away at that.

how dare you? i, you... i've loved you since we were kids, john! and you broke my heart, which i can understand because there is nothing that dictates that you had to return my feelings. but then i move on, grow a family with someone else, and suddenly you want me? you need, i... don't touch me. i need time to think.

you leave him there in the room, and then john hears the baby crying.

he scratches the back of his head, and heads toward the nursery. when the baby sees him, she throws her grubby hands up, gesturing to be picked up.

dada.

yes, sweetheart. i'm your dada.

schemeerrrr.

#cbf!price #i love him #this got away from me so fast #how did i end up here #john price

[arkvra]

Jealous?

#this is so embarrassing #how did I end up here #u know what #just this once #the grandmaster of demonic cultivation #mdzs #mo dao su zhi #wei wuxian #wei ying #lan wangji #lan zhan #魔道祖师 #mdzs fanart #忘羡 #wangxian #rkgk

[wysteribun]

where am i....

#arknights #how did i end up here #hellagur #lee arknights #mlynar #passenger arknights #merch wip

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Asmi my dear, have you ever folded a fitted bedsheet?

I... I have tried to. We do not talk about about my level of success or lack thereof.

What--why is this a question? Is this your suggestion for Patreon content that I make? Just me losing my mind over trying to fold a fitted bedsheet? Because if so, while I don't doubt this sadistic fandom will find it amusing, the Patreon thing sounds like even more of a terrible idea.

Realistic image of what would happen:

HELLO MAGGOTS I'M GOING TO FOLD THIS FITTED SHEET FOR MONEY HOW IS THIS MY LIFE NOW. Okay really carefully like one bit after another. IKEA I believe in you surely you made this sheet foldable. I'm gonna just... uh... tuck in the corner. Okay that didn't work. FUCKING HELL STAY IN PLACE I JUST WANT TO TURN YOU OVER IN HALF. SWEDEN YOU WILL PAY FOR YOUR SINS JUST LET ME FOLD THE GODDAMN THING IN HALF. FITTED SHEET MORE LIKE SHITTED FEET AMIRITE AHAHAHAHAHAH FUCKING FOLD GODDAMMIT STAY CORNERED SO I CAN PRETEND YOU'RE AN ORDINARY SHEET. I feel like there was a tutorial on Pinterest and this had a technique but we all know I forgot it as soon as I saw it. Besides now it's outright war between me and you, you shitted feet, and I will not be conquered by an IKEA sheet. WE'RE NOT INVADING DENMARK ANYMORE WE'RE INVADING SWEDEN IKEA YOU COULD HAVE MADE THIS A LITTLE EASIER. I KNOW ALL FITTED SHEETS ARE LIKE THIS BUT I'M CHOOSING TO BLAME SWEDEN BECAUSE THIS ONE IS FROM IKEA. AAAAAAAAAAAAUGH IF TIME IS MONEY IT WOULD ACTUALLY COST ME LESS TO GO BUY A MATTRESS AND JUST STORE THE FITTED SHEET AROUND A MATTRESS. MAYBE I CAN JUST CRUMPLE IT UP AND TOSS IT SOMEWHERE. Wait no you guys paid for me to fold it. SEE THIS IS THE ISSUE WITH CAPITALISM I AM A SLAVE TO THE DAILY GRIND--

I hate how vividly I pictured that. And yeah. My internal monologues do actually sound like that.

@howmanyholesinswisscheese maybe if you'd been less vanilla mum wouldn't have left you and then I'd know how to fold a fitted sheet. @arkytiorlecter you failed me too. @obsessed-sketches Dear Dr Leo, my family did not teach me to fold fitted sheets. What do I do?

#shitpost #IS THIS WHAT YOU'D CALL A SHEET POST #OR A FIT POST #weirdly specific but ok #asmi #good omens mascot #now in the business of folding fitted sheets #maggots #fitted sheets #ikea #about... fitted sheets? #shitposting #what am i doing #idk man #this is just #HOW DID I END UP HERE #the fam #dear dr leo

[mothras-in-my-belly]

I never thought I'd be reading the bible for the first time at 23 because I want to know the lore of some ridiculuous queer dudes on my screen and yet here we are

#how did i end up here #in 12 episodes total good omens achieved what my mother couldn't in 23 years #I just needed the right motivation i guess #that motivation being gay yearning #good omens brainrot #Good omens s2 #good omens season 2 #aziraphale #crowley #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #ineffable bureaucracy #neil gaiman #writers strike

[nonameidentified]

This

Also this

I can smell the shippers from a mile away.

Both of these reek of gay subtext, the likes of which I've never seen.

Constantly going on dates and what this is :

The hand holding (＞∀＜)

They could be slow burn too, but I'm too lazy to read the manga right now.

Also, my new boss is goofy also exists in this lethal amounts of gay subtext area, but it feels like a slow burn (like stardust telepath), but the bigger reason is that their gayness cannot be encapsulated in a single gif.

Also also, both my new boss is goofy and stardust telepath are iyashikei anime. So they will heal your soul, so please watch them if you haven't already. Both of them have autistic people, too.

Speaking of iyashikei, the yuzuki family's four sons also exist, so go watch it. (no gay subtext, though)

#how did I end up here #this post went from gay subtext to iyashikei #that's what happens when i ramble i guess #shy #teru momijiyama #iko koishikawa #ron kamonohashi's forbidden deductions #ron kamonohashi deranged detective #deranged detective #ron kamonohashi #isshiki totomaru #how many names does this one show have #my new boss is goofy #atarashii joushi wa do tennen #stardust telepath #hoshikuzu telepath #the yuzuki family's four sons #iyashikei #iyashikei anime

[nyxstyxsstuff]

How it started

How it went

And how it's going 💞💞💞

A friend sent a picture of a book called Boys Are Poisonous, and my brain ran with the idea until I started drawing Snakeboy Steve Rogers. Now I'm 3 days into drawing this, and I have an entire AU fic idea lined up. I am so proud of how soft I made Steve look in this ❣️

#snake boy #steve rogers #steve rogers fanart #stevebucky #stucky #digital drawing #drawing #my draws #how did i end up here #too many ideas #drawing that many leaves is pain #send help #i need sleep #and food #plants #soft steve rogers #soft stevie #he is totally clutching Bucky's pillow #Bucky caught him like this

[franky-y]

well... i'm currently drawing that closeup of Hä licking Jeres stomach

and i'm kinda questioning my life choices

#how did i end up here #also im scared that my mom walks in on me drawing this ahfdjsd #i swear if that happens i'll throw my computer out the window and myself as well lmfaoo #käärijä #khaarija calendar

[sorchathered]

Not me writing a fluffy one shot for BRADLEY BRADSHAW. What the hell is happening to me. 😩

#top gun maverick #mom come get me I’m scared #how did i end up here #bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #it’s so angsty and romantic #Bob baby I promise I’m still your number one girl #I just can’t get this out of my head

[local-idiot0]

GUESS WHO SAW THE MARIO MOVIE TODAY

So I ended up watching the Mario movie today with a few friends and a kid(bout like 8 or so) took his girlfriend and looked her dead in the eyes AND STARTED SINGING “BITCHES, BITCHES, BITCHES BITCHES BITCHES”

THE MOVIE HAD BOWSER SINGING PEACHES

THE KID LOOKED AT ME AND SAID: “you kinda look like bitches” AND JUST WALKED AWAY

I LEGIT DIED OF LAUGHTER

SOMEONE COME SAVE THIS KID LMAOOO

#how did i end up here #funny stories #funnyshit #mario movie #super mario brothers #peaches #mario would hate bowuigi #bowuigi ship #luigi x bowser #bowser x luigi #bowuigi #am bored #this is a cry for help #im gonna take a nap #Bowuigi is really cool and is sick as hell but it slightly feels like a crime against humanity

[orsialos]

normalize staying up until 12:30 am reading a dissertation about an ancient religious cult and then going to your completely average office job the next day

#life gets so weird sometimes #how did i end up here #personal

[etoilesbienne]

qbbh is so beautiful he has the ability to be like milf shipped any dude who wonders near him Oh god is he a babygirl. Where am i

#posts from the aether #how did i end up here

[jooqlz]

When the rare pair you're currently fixating on has like no art and so few fics you end up on FF and question if it's worth it

#It was not worth it ughhhh #Why did I get into an early 2000s Fandom #How did I end up here

[rfswitchart]

It's out now: The Road Trip (An Owl House Fanfic) https://www.tumblr.com/rfswitchart/726142786034892800/show-chapter-archive?source=share

"Two years after the epilogue of The Owl House, Luz And Amity have finally gotten married. They decided the best honeymoon they could possibly go on is to 'dress up and travel' across America and bring their closest friends along for the ride. It’s a slice of life roadtrip about self-discovery, romance, and seeing a whole new world. How will our heroes fare on this long journey? Only one way to find out." So... How did we get here? How did I, a person who is currently writing my own series, decide I wanted to write my first fanfiction in over a decade? Well, for starters, I'm waiting for the last parts of my new PC to get here so I can actually get back to writing and drawing. Since I can't do actual work, as my current computer is finally on its last legs, I needed something to occupy my time. And then, while loving the Owl House and thinking about ideas for things, I came up with an idea where Hexsquad (which includes Vee, Masha, and Matt) just go on a big ass college road trip across the country. So far, I have written five chapters and so far have ideas up to 11 (there will be more, obviously.) I just wanted to try this out because I genuinely like the idea and felt I could do it justice. That said, I have made an AO3 account (rfswitchart, just as I am everywhere,) and am going to start posting it soon with new chapters every two weeks. I hope you all enjoy it, I'm loving writing this and have a lot of great ideas for it.

#the owl house #fanfic #lumity #huntlow #veesha #gustholomule #The Road Trip #Fate help me #how did i end up here #I'm having fun at least

[hyunjining]

all those people who became kpop blogs years ago were right actually

#how did i end up here #y’all would not believe how much money i’ve spent on kpop in the last few months 😶

[gimmethatagustd]

Me reading a mafia fic and getting to a torture scene where Taehyung cuts a guy’s tongue out:

#how did i end up here #kfjfofhdks #this is what I get for not working on my wips #jai talks