#Here is a Fun Science Experiment You Can Try at Home
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#Here is a Fun Science Experiment You Can Try at Home#science#Science™#ice cubes#pan#bear#unreality#don’t try this at home#any of it
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What we were
Summary: After losing Clint, your marriage and family begins to fall apart. Will Natasha be able to go back to what you once were?
A/N: This is going to be four chapters, but most of it is written. It’s a mix of angst, hurt and comfort. Obvious warning, there’s a major character death. Natasha and R have a daughter.
Time was unforgiving.
It had been six months since you lost Clint. Two since you asked Natasha to move out.
Four hours of sleep was the most you could get each night.
Time heals everything, people say.
Then, how come, the more time passed, the worse you felt?
Thoughts like these invade your mind, even when doing the most mundane of tasks. Like now, when you’re waiting for your daughter’s school day to be over. Leaning over your black Mercedes, you wish that your injured leg could be less of a bother and instead of driving, you could walk to pick up Anya and get distracted by the sights of the city.
The school bell rings and the quiet classrooms are full of murmurs, books stored away and steps walking -some rushing eagerly- to the exit.
Impossible to miss, Anya’s red waves are the first thing you spot. Raising a hand, she says goodbye to her friends and walks your way.
“Hi, darling” you sigh against her head.
She’s getting taller and maybe next year she won’t let you hug her. Maybe she’ll even want to take the bus while you anxiously wait for her return home. But now, she’s still a sweet child and she still lets you run your hands through her hair.
“How was Debate Club?” it’s the first thing you ask, because she’d been preparing relentlessly to beat the other team.
“We won, obviously”
“We should celebrate” a voice joins the conversation. You’re so startled that you drop the car keys.
“Mom!” Anya says, wrapping her arms around Natasha.
It makes you happy that she’s not resentful even after everything that happened. That she can love so unconditionally.
She didn’t get that from you.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt” Natasha apologizes, finally looking at you. There’s a weak smile on your face, what else can you do? “I was thinking we could go shopping for that new game you wanted?”
“Can we please, Momma?” Anya turns to you.
“Sure. Have fun. But don’t spoil your appetite. We’re having lasagna”
“Mom, our favorite” Anya nudges the Russian and you look away.
“I’ll have her home by 6” Natasha saves you the embarrassment of being forced to invite her.
“Have fun” you wave goodbye, heart beating fast.
Breaking the speed limit, you rush home. But the tears start running long before you’re parked.
You look at your sad reflection in the rearview mirror.
Natasha looks better than the last time you saw each other.
Maybe all she needed was to be away from you, to be happy again.
--
Two glasses of wine later, you’re curled up on the sofa watching your favorite comfort show and feeling better.
“What’s up, Buck?” you answer at the second ring of your phone.
“Are you ok?”
You look at the half empty glass of wine and decide that no, you’re most definitely not ok.
“Sure, why you ask?”
“I just saw her driving with Anya”
“Mhm” you look at the clock. 5:55 PM. She’s trying to be a responsible parent, at least. “Yeah, she showed up at school today. It’s good that they spent time together”
“Want me to come over?”
“No, I don’t want you two fighting in my front yard. Thanks, though”
“I’ll stop by tomorrow, ok? And if you feel like it, we can go to that Broadway show on Saturday. I got us tickets”
“Thanks, Buck”
“Ok, she’s parking outside now”
“You followed them all the way here?” you jump out of the couch, looking out the window.
“What? I was worried!”
“Sometimes I think it’s not so great that you live a few blocks away, you weirdo”
“But then I bring coffee and scones and you change your mind”
“Yeap”
“See ya, doll”
“Bye, creep”
“Oh, come on!”
You let out a laugh at his protest. Wanda and Yelena have been texting you, so you scroll, smiling at the silly pictures of Fanny or the videos of Tommy and Billy doing their crazy science experiments.
“Hi, Ma” Anya rushes past you. “Gonna change for dinner”
“Mmkay” you nod, texting Bucky to make sure he’s actually back home, and not slashing Natasha’s tires.
“So…”
“Nat, jeez” you drop the phone, not even aware that she is still here. She looks at you across the kitchen island.
Don’t think how sad it is that she looks out of place here, where it used to be home.
Don’t cry in front of her.
Don’t.
“Sorry, I’ll say goodbye and leave”
“Anya, your mom’s leaving” you busy yourself in the kitchen, looking away.
“So soon?” the girl peeks around, pouting. “We haven’t even played the game yet”
“Would you like to stay for dinner?” you give up, unable to say no to your daughter.
“You sure?”
“Yeah, I’m always making extra anyways”
Because you were used to cooking dinner for three.
Anya is happy to set the table, but you sit next to your daughter, leaving Natasha in front of her. You try to stay focused on Anya and school: the debate club, sports activities, a month in Europe for the best students.
“Mom, do you think I can reach out to aunt Carol? I have some Astronomy questions”
Natasha immediately looks at you, but you’re hyper focused on the bottle of wine and pouring the last of it until your glass is filled to the rim.
“Uh, she’s not... I’m not sure where Danvers is, sweetheart. She left Earth a while back”
“Oh, ok” the girl nods, looking at you with a frown. “Mom, what’s wrong? Is your leg hurting? What did Doctor Cho say?”
Crap.
“What’s wrong, det…?” Natasha asks, looking at you. The pet name almost rolled off her tongue.
Everything. Everything is wrong, Natasha.
“That old injury from our outlaw days. Doctor Cho gave me some pain killers. But I don’t think I’ll take them, they make me too sleepy”
“We’ll do the dishes” Natasha jumps in. “Don’t worry about it”
“Thanks”
The dishes are the least of your worries, but it’s still a nice gesture.
Maybe when she’s finally ready to ask you to divorce her, you’ll be able to coparent.
“Here, let me” she asks as you approach with the empty glass of wine. “Did Doctor Cho say anything else?”
You sigh, leaning against the counter, watching as she washes the dishes.
“She said surgery might make the pain go away. Actually, there’s a 90% chance it will work. But Anya’s got school and I’d have to do bed rest for at least five weeks. Maybe during winter break”
“I can take care of her. Drive her to school or cook dinner or…”
“You’re a terrible cook” you remind her. It’s meant to be a joke, but also a way to make her stop.
You don’t want to be a burden for someone who doesn’t want you anymore.
“Wanda could teach me”
“She’s too busy making sure the twins aren’t building a nuclear weapon in the garage”
“Is there anything I can do to help?” she asks, almost afraid of your answer.
“Can you take her to school tomorrow?” you finally say, without providing further details.
The truth is, you’ll probably cry until you fall asleep, because you miss Natasha and this is the first time you’ve seen her in two months.
And it would be better if you could sleep in, make an appointment with your therapist and then find a way to look composed by the time you have to pick your daughter from school.
“Absolutely”
“Thank you”
“You don’t have to thank me, Y/N”
The way she says your name makes you want to scream.
--
Natasha’s long gone, Anya sleeping peacefully back in her room.
You’re looking at the ceiling, tears rolling down your face and soaking your pillow.
You miss her so damn much. You love her so much.
And you also hate her. And you hate yourself for loving her.
There’s a soft knock at your door. You know it’s not Anya because she would have turned on the hallway light.
“Hey, weirdo” you look at Bucky from across the room, smiling sadly. He approaches you and wraps you in his arms. You sob against his chest, feeling like the sadness will last forever.
“I’m sorry”
“It’s ok. Let it all out. I’m here”
You don’t know when you fall asleep.
--
A lot has changed in such a short time, but by now, Anya is used to the sight of her uncle Bucky, rotating between the few breakfast foods he can make without burning everything.
“You read my mind” Anya watches as he makes blueberry pancakes.
“Has no one ever told you it’s rude to sneak up on people?” he mumbles, impressed at how silent she was.
“No, because my moms are spies and so is my uncle and my other aunt and basically half my family”
“Smart ass,” he chuckles. “Come on, eat your food before it gets cold”
“Did mom eat anything yet?” Anya sits on a stool, eating on the kitchen counter.
“Your mom’s asleep” Bucky says. In fact, you cried, had a panic attack, a couple of nightmares, woke up to drink some water and then fell asleep at 4 AM.
Basically, the usual for the past two months.
He’s so caught in his thoughts that he forgets to flip the last pancake. A knock on the front door snaps him back to reality.
“Can you turn off the stove? And pack your bag, we’re leaving in five…” Bucky yells over, opening the door without looking through the peephole first. He’s surprised to find Natasha on the other side “Can I help you?”
“I’m here to pick up my daughter”
“Does Y/N know?” He's holding on to the door so hard that the wood cracks.
“She asked me to drive Anya to school”
“Ok, I’m ready” Anya announces, aware that her mother and uncle aren’t on the best terms. She walks between them to make sure they won’t punch each other. “Bye, uncle, thanks for breakfast”
“Have a good day, sweetheart. See you Saturday”
“Right, for that musical, Beaglejuice”
“Shut up” he chuckles, kissing her forehead. Anya leans forward and hugs him goodbye.
Natasha is silent for most of the ride. Anya is looking out the window, uncertain of her mother’s mood. Maybe not saying anything is safer.
Three blocks away from school and Natasha hears herself blurting out what’s been on her mind this whole time.
“Does Barnes stay over a lot?”
“I guess” Anya mutters, still looking out the window.
“Well, do you know…”
The girl has enough, turning around to face her mother. There’s nothing but resentment in her eyes as she tells Natasha everything.
“Mom cries herself to sleep every night. Ever since you moved out, it's been hard for her to get up in the morning and act normal, let alone cook breakfast. So yeah, uncle Bucky is around all the time, just to make sure she’s at the very least alive. You’d know if you still cared about us”
“Anya…”
“I’ll walk the rest of the way, thanks for the ride” she mumbles, opening the door and rushing away. Natasha is stuck in traffic, so all she can do is watch her daughter from the car.
Just when she was starting to make things right, she fucks up again.
--
“Thanks for breakfast” you say, mouth full of pancakes.
“More like lunch” Bucky corrects.
You nod, reaching for the maple syrup.
“So, why’d you ask Natasha to drive Anya to school?”
“Is that why my door is almost broken in half?”
“I’ll fix it”
“You better” you mumble. He is still staring and you shrug your shoulders. “Just experimenting how co-parenting is gonna be when we officially divorce”
“So, you are asking her to divorce you?”
“She’s gonna ask me. Sooner or later” you keep your head down, playing with your food. You’re not hungry anymore.
“All things considered, the ball is in your court”
“Buck” you plead, dropping the fork.
“I’m just saying” he approaches your side. “You’ll only be able to heal once you know what you both want. But running away won’t help”
“You sound like my therapist”
“But does she cook you breakfast?”
“For what she’s charging me, she should, actually” both of you laugh. And damn it, you know he’s right. “Thank you, for worrying about me. And for taking care of us these past few months. I’m sorry I’m such a mess”
As if on cue, tears start streaming down your face. Bucky hugs you, kissing your head.
“It’s ok”
“I know you hate it when people cry, I’m sorry”
“Yeah, but I hate it a little bit more when you’re the one crying”
--
Luckily for your therapist, you’re all cried out by the time you reach her office. Instead, you discuss how it would be better to approach Natasha, who has always struggled with communication around difficult topics.
“I’m very happy with this session. We’ve made great progress” Doctor Thompson says and you put your fist forward.
“Fist bump” you encourage her.
“I’ll get my license taken away if we ever do this again”
For the first time in months, you leave her office feeling a little bit lighter.
Until you check your phone. 10 missed calls from Natasha.
“Nat?” you answer as she calls again.
“Is Anya with you?”
“I was about to pick her up from school” there’s a pause. “You did drive her to school, right?”
“Of course, I’m not an idiot” she shoots back.
“Well, I’m very confused because she’s only about to end her last class. Why would she be anywhere else, then?” you retort.
“Just meet me back home, ok?” she pleads.
“Fine”
She’s pacing on the sidewalk as you park.
“Care to explain?”
“The school called me an hour ago. She sneaked out after recess”
“Let’s just track her phone”
“It’s off”
“Well, fuck” you run your hand through your hair. “Did she say anything to you this morning? Did she seem upset?”
Natasha looks away, chewing on her bottom lip.
“I asked her if Barnes was staying over often”
“Natasha, for fuck’s sake” you sigh, turning away from her.
Don’t shout. You won’t solve anything by screaming at Natasha.
Your daughter is missing because your wife can’t keep her jealousy to herself. So fuck it.
“If you want to know anything, you ask me, Natasha, do you understand? You don’t go questioning our 13 year old daughter, who, by the way, has been through enough shit lately. I’m trying to protect her and you’re here implying I’m sleeping with the only friend who isn’t tired of me being a mess. Which, for the record, I’m not. And would never. Unlike you, I’m not going around fucking people outside my marriage because I’m having a hard time”
“I don’t know how to get close to you, Y/N. You pushed me out ever since…”
“No! You don’t get to put this on me. I tried for months. I tried everything. And you scoffed and ignored and stood me up. I gave up the moment I found you in bed with Carol”
Your voice breaks at the last part. That memory has been buried for so long; you want it to stay hidden, forever.
It doesn’t matter. You need to find Anya.
“What are you doing?”
“Calling Buck”
“I’m here. I’ll help you find her”
“I’ll find my daughter alone, thank you” you walk past her, waiting impatiently for your friend to pick up.
“She’s my daughter too”
“You sure as hell haven’t acted like her mother in a long time, Natalia”
You walk away, your back turned to her.
“Buck” you say, voice trembling.
“I know. She’s at the Met. Hasn’t left. I’m outside, just in case”
“How did you…?”
“I’m sorry. I was hoping I could convince her to come back before you found out she sneaked out of class”
“I’ll be there as soon as I can”
--
Again, those soft waves of red are the first thing you spot in the room. Her blue eyes are fixed on Degas and his Dance Class.
“Hey, kiddo” you stand next to her, understanding immediately why she’s looking at this painting. “We still have your ballerina shoes somewhere in a box. Your mom loved going to your recitals”
“I’m sorry for leaving school”
“I played hooky a couple of times. It’s part of life. I just want to make sure you’re ok”
“She doesn’t care if you’re able to get up in the morning but gets jealous because someone is taking care of us”
You sigh. Anya has Natasha’s heart, after all. She loves and protects fiercely.
“That’s not exactly true. Come with me” your daughter takes your hand as you leave the museum.
Central Park is still looking beautiful, even as fall approaches. Anya plops down on a bench and you take a seat next to her. A small groan leaves your lips. This damn leg.
“You know your mother was raised to be an assassin. The Red Room taught her that love was a weakness. And that she was incapable of having a family or people that cared about her. Even after all these years, insecurity can get the best of Nat sometimes”
“Why can’t we just… go back to what we used to be?” she mumbles, a tear rolling down her face.
“Oh, sweetheart” you hold her against your chest. “I want nothing more in this world”
“I miss her”
“Me too, Anya”
“It’s like we lost her the day uncle Clint died” she sobs.
“But she’s still here. And she still needs you, my sweet girl. I’m not saying you should forgive her right this second. But don’t build a wall around yourself, please”
“Ok”
“You know I lost my mom when I was 15. And a lot of that time I spent it angry at her for staying with a man that wasn’t good to us. But once she was gone, all I wished was that I had made her life a little easier”
“I’m sorry”
“It’s ok. I’m glad I’m here, to make sure you don’t make the same mistake I did. We’re gonna be alright, I promise”
“I love you”
“Love you too, kiddo” you keep her in your arms for as long as you can, but a light rain begins to fall. “Come on, now. Bucky’s been waiting for us”
“I know. I saw him following me on the bus here”
“My God, I don’t know which one of you is scarier”
Anya giggles, and you take her hand.
Even between all of this mess, she’s the one thing that makes everything worth it.
--
Anya was the one that texted her mother, apologizing and letting her know she was ok.
You didn’t reply to Natasha’s text. “I’m sorry” isn’t enough sometimes.
After pizza and an intense game of Jenga with Anya and Bucky, you call it a night.
You know what you’ll dream of tonight, but you’re too tired to care.
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Motivation: things to like about these subjects
Math:
Isn’t math kinda magical in a way? See, the thing about math is that it’s the same in every country! Every equation, no matter how hard or complex or long, can easily be broken down into much easier ones, (like simple adding, multiplying, dividing, or subtracting) Once you know what’s going on, it’s not really that hard. (+ take cute notes!!)
Science:
Ookay, honestly? Science is genuinely so interesting! How your body works, how plants create their own food, how the whole solar system was made/ operates, whether there’s other life out there, chemical reactions & experiments? If you actually tried to be fascinated by it, you’ll be surprised how incredible it all is! (+ take cute notes!!)
English:
Me personally, I loveee English. You can too by trying to romanticise it!
If you’re doing poetry, like what’s there not to like? Poetry is such a beautiful language, it’s a way of expression through gentleness.
Writing short stories? This is my favourite. You can write it about anything, the possibilities are endless! Doesn’t it excite you?
History
Don’t try to remember facts and dates of events, try to learn the story behind it. You’ll find that it actually becomes so much more interesting if you remember the story, the emotions, the plots of the event.
Romanticising: hot chocolate or some hot coffee, studying at home, hair in a messy bun, playing some classical music in the background.
(+ also in class when you’re taking notes, you can doodle pictures of the people (stick figures for me lol), how they’d feel like or events on the side to add a bit of fun to it)
And honestly, history is such ‘romance subject’ (like arts, music, literature, languages)
Geography
Become good at it. If you don’t already have an interest in geography, then what helped me was becoming good at it. Paying attention during lessons, taking cute notes, etc. becoming good at it made it so much easier and less scary
Languages
This is also what I’d call a “Romance language”. Also dont you want to learn new languages? So many people decide to learn languages later in their lives because they find out it helps you in one way or another, but in school they’re already teaching it to you in the BEST WAY! Also knowing and being able to speak more than 1 languages fluently makes you SO powerful bc then you can speak in more countries. And also imagine how impressed people would be?!
Music
Have fun with it! It mostly depends on what you are doing in your music lessons, but what you would normally be doing is learning/ practicing an instrument. Don’t be immature and play it at random times when the teacher is talking, but just have fun with it! Again, like i said earlier, so many people start to learn music so much later in their lives and here it is being handed to you on a silver platter. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT!
Art / art&design
Personally, I LOVE art!! It’s another “romance subject”. It’s a beautiful form of expression. Even though you may not be doing what you want to be doing, still have fun with it!! Be creative! And importantly: loosen up! Art, like beauty, is very very subjective. One person’s scribble can be another’s MASTERPIECE! So stop bring so worried with it being “correct”. Just have appreciation.
P.E (physical education/ sport)
I just don’t understand why anyone wouldn’t like PE. Like you don’t even have to learn anything, you just run around playing fun games. And as a bonus u get fit!
xoxo, vanilla
#agirlwithglam🎀✨#vanilla studies📚#studying aesthetic#study motivation#studying#studying motivation#studyspo#study blog#academia#it girl energy#self improvement#study tips#studyblr#student#student life#study aesthetic#girlblog#girlblogging#self development#it girl#that girl#it girl studies#it girl studying#rory gilmore#paris geller#how to study
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Atoms Love ❙ TP Ratchet x f!robot reader ❙ NSFW 18+
Word count: 3000+ 😅
Warnings: Smut ( Touching, teasing and spike in valve ). NSFW 18+.
Notes: Been wanting to do one of Ratchet for a while now and was so thrilled to get this finished. I did change the title from the previews I had posted, I just felt this was more suited. Thanks anon for sending in this beauty, I had lots of fun with it. Sorry for the wait.
I'd like to add that when reader use to be Rachet's student she was of age, not underage. Just a simple rule that teachers shouldn't be involed with their students like in our world with collage/university. That's all. Hope you're all enjoy the sexy medic. 🥰
Your arrival on earth is greeted with a warm welcome from team prime. For so long you've been travelling planet to planet, searching for friends and perhaps a place to call home. While you didn't mind the ongoing travel at first, you were eager to settle for good. Earth was your next stop and you felt pretty lucky to find Optimus Prime and his team, but what got you even more excited was that Ratchet was there, your former teacher back on Cybertron way before the war started.
Through the coms of your ship you can hear the ecstasy from Ratchet, and you can't hold back your beaming smile hearing your favourite medic again after so long. Earth is to be your home now, that's what you decided. Sure, decepticons might've been hanging around but you could handle it. Your skills as a medic and through tinkering science will prove to be useful, all thanks to Ratchet who has taught everything he knew.
It's good to have Arcee around, you thought, so you weren't the only femme around, and she admitted that it's good to have another femme to join team prime. She is pretty cool, you thought, and such a skilled warrior. You two were going to get along.
The others were great as well, you even met these interesting humans they had around. Optimus expressed his appreciation to have you join them, and also added that Ratchet hadn't stopped talking about you since the comlink transmission. At first you were flattered, but hearing Ratchet fluster so quickly, struggling to explain himself did make your cheek plating heat up a little trying to hide your smile.
The moment was over, but Ratchet and you did spend a lot of time together, mostly talking about science and even doing small experiments of your own just for fun. The others saw all this but they didn't dare to say anything or interfere. Apparently Ratchet was pretty quick with his wrench if someone was to disturb him.
It's been a few weeks now since your arrival and it was going well. You feel settled and are surrounded by others who are almost like a family. You find yourself with Ratchet again, of course, you do spend a lot of time with him. Later that evening, you are both currently doing some tinkering and small experiments to pass the time together, measuring the right formulas and discussing the old times back on Cybertron.
"Oh but I'm serious. Out of all my students, you were one of the best. Someone with your intelligence deserved to be in the higher ranked classes, and I argued with those lug nuts in the higher grounds, but they didn't see what I saw." Ratchet goes on to say as you listen in.
"Well, it's a good thing that didn't happen, because I would've missed my favourite teacher. I only learned from the best, and it's because of you that I ended up here."
"Me? No, I'm sure there are other reasons." He tries to brush himself off but you shake your helm.
"There was much I believed from you, and I admired you, I still do, and I'm grateful I had a good teacher like you to help guide me through my younger learning time."
Meeting his gaze you saw him staring at you fondly as you return the same stare before he forces himself to break that small trance you thought you felt happening. It was quiet before you heard him vent out heavily and place his tinkering on the bench.
"May I make a confession to you, y/n?" His tone is deep, as if he's still wondering if he should keep talking to you about whatever is going on in his processor. "Just promise not to laugh."
"Of course you can. I've never made fun of you before, and I don't plan on it." You'll listen to him and hear what he has to say.
"Well, when you were my student, I did say a number of times how much I admired you and praised your skills, but what I never told you was that I admired you...affectionately."
This makes you stop what you're doing. He now had your full attention. "Putting it simple, you had a crush on me?"
Ratchet lets out a light hearty laugh but it's not because of what you said, but because of what he was confessing to you after all this time. "Yeah, that's putting it simple." Another vent leaves him, optics cast against the bench as he fiddles with the tinkers to try and avoid your own optics. You wonder if he is ashamed or embarrassed, but you want him to know that he doesn't need to be.
"How come you didn't say anything before?" You already knew the answer to that.
"Because I was your teacher and you were my student, it wouldn't have been right. You would've been kicked out and I would've been demoted from my position. So, I locked away those affections, and continued to be your teacher."
"That sounds sad. Doesn't sound like you wanted to do that, and you are making yourself sound like you haven't been happy for a long time."
"Oh I've been...content." He didn't sound very convincing to you. "Don't you worry, y/n. I might be older but that doesn't mean I haven't been happy. Regrets, yes, but that's only natural for anyone. I'm just pleased that you're here now, that's all that matters."
If only you knew, perhaps things might've been different.
To move on from it he tries to focus on his tinkering as you look down at your own a little, pondering your thoughts. Well, he did it first, you are only going to add more to this with no way out.
"I have a confession." He hears this from you as he locks his optics with your own. "When I was your student, I was...enamoured by you." You decide to use the fancy words like he does and look at the gadget in your servos a little, turning it for a better look and giving Ratchet the moment he needed to let this progress in him.
"You? I-I mean...you?" His confusion makes you feel a little amused. "How come you said nothing?"
"I was your student and you were my teacher, it would not have been right." You answer the same as his own. "Also, I did express my feelings, just not verbally."
"Well, you're going to have to explain that one to me, because I don't recall anything that gave me any signals that you felt like this towards me." He sounded a little miffed but not in a bad way, mostly with himself you think for not noticing.
"Those blue energon roses. One was left at your work station every week. They're hard to grow and need the right formulas for them to flourish which I did every week and presented to you. I never said they were from me but I watched from afar. You admired them."
"You?" He lays everything on the bench and leans himself against it as if his knees were growing weak. "Those were from you?"
"I learned from the best." You give a dainty smile. "You taught me how to grow them, and I wanted to express my gratitude and...affections, without either of us getting in trouble."
Perhaps if you both confessed your feelings for one another during those times, things might've been different. Sure, you might've been kicked out and he would've lost his position, but at least you would've had each other, right? That's the childish dream you had while being his student but you got over it, at least that's what you kept telling yourself.
"So, you felt the same way about me?" Ratchet wants to clarify once more from you. "Do those feelings still persist?"
"I did." You confirm. "And they do."
Its then you notice you're both holding a deep rooted stare. Blue optic illuminating together in a stronghold, one and the other silently screaming for the other to do or say something, quickly, before it escapes. Ratchet catches it just in time.
"What's stopping us now?"
"Nothing."
It all happens abruptly, one moment you and Ratchet were tinkering away with experiments and the next, you find yourself in his private quarters. There's a growing fever as you run your servos across his chassis, up over his shoulder pads as you feel his own servos smooth over your waist. His warm lips are across your own in a deep, slow passion, his glossa coils with your own while you welcome his touches and kisses through pure ecstasy and eagerness.
Ratchet calmly leads you towards his berth where he sits himself and you straddle his lap as you keep the kiss hot and lasting between you both. It's him that eventually breaks the kiss, touching your helms together as your heated vents hit against each other.
"Would you like to try out a new experiment?"
"I thought we already were." You can't help but giggle faintly, regarding the humid moment you are both currently sharing.
"Think of it as an add on to our current one."
"Why not? Tinkering with experiments is kind of our thing."
Ratchet lets out a light chuckle that you grew to love so rapidly.
"Turn around, and settle in my lap again."
Following his gentle command you do that, sitting back down and pressing your back against his chassis as you feel his servos calmly move across your waist, cascading down over your hips and across your thighs, letting them linger there while he feels you under his touch. You let out a placid vent, feeling relaxed and a small boiling of desire creeping its way through your frame. He then touches his wrist and you catch onto a device being activated in front of your both.
"A hologram mirror?" You smile warmly in amusement. "Is there a reason that it's set up right in front of your berth?"
"Perhaps I like to admire myself." There's a hint of playfulness in his voice making you giggle faintly in return.
"Well, you're quite the sight."
"You're a better looking sight."
Ratchet turns your helm a little so he can kiss you gently before resuming his actions, servos ghostly running on top of your tights and inwards, close to your warm panel. His chin rests against your shoulder as he looks at the mirror, as you lock your optics on it as well, watching what he is doing to you. To see everything is very arousing for you both.
You spread your legs to give him more access, hanging over each of his as you settle comfortably in his lap and rest yourself back against him, letting out silent heated vents that slowly boil more within you. Your waist wiggles, rubbing softly against Ratchet's panel causing him to let out a silky moan.
"Let's have a look at you. Retract your panel, please."
Without any pause you do this, revealing your already soaked valve for you both to see through the mirror. You can feel Ratchet quiver against your back as he stares, servos moving even closer to your valve.
"Stunning." He whispers into your audio. It's your turn to moan when he touches a digit against your moist lips and delicate node, exploring and teasing you for his own pleasure.
You watch as he uses a second digit to open your lips to explore you more, and uses another with his other servo to gently push into your valve. Instantly you clench around to invading digit, a feathered moan lingering from your vocals. You can't help but rock your hips gently, both of you watching as he plays with you. "Ratchet." His name sighs from you while your servos rest against both his thighs.
"You're a rare beauty, y/n. You were always my favourite student." His charming words causes you to smile shyly.
"As you were my favourite teacher." Next, you got cocky. "Is this what you always wanted to do to me?"
Ratchet is quiet, optics staring at what he's doing while playing with your valve, digit pumping into you slowly. His response is by adding a second digit to join the first, and his other servo circles around your node, causing you to gasp and back arch, feeling the new buzz suddenly electrocute through your frame.
"This, and much more."
You weep softly through the burning lust that drifts across your entire frame, hips swaying in sync with his servos and digits against your valve before moving your servo up to touch the side of Ratchet's face as a way to hold on and keep him close as possible. Your optics never leave the mirror, fascinated by the sight of yourself and Ratchet's skillful servos on you, knowing very well that he'll more than likely want to try out other things in the future. After all, nothing is holding either of you back anymore.
You hear a faint click and you see his throbbing spike emerge from it's housing between your legs. His girth size was rather impressive, thick and throbbing, canvas up perfectly as small drops of trans fluid leaks from his tip and runs down his length.
He catches you from the mirror staring at his spike making him chuckle lightly. "I'm not that impressive."
"Liar." You comment back before gently wrapping you servo around his spike, hearing him letting out a hitched vent at your warm touch as his optics shuttered a little. "You're beyond impressive. You're phenomenal." It's your turn to moan again as he rewards you with a third digit in your soaking valve.
"You're too kind to this old timer."
"You're my old timer." You notice his expression change a little, as if he is touched by your words before giving you a soft beam against your shoulder.
Your servo slowly starts to pump at his spike, feeling every ridge along the base and every twitch given from him, digit rubbing at his tip and back down to moist him all over. You kind of feel like you're going to need it. His servos are kept on your valve, digits pumping into your stretched depths while rubbing still slow at your node. He doesn't want you overloading just yet. With all this happening both your moans and heated vents surround you both, growing more hotter and eager for more.
"Ratchet, please, I need you inside me."
"Stand up." It seems you both have the same thoughts. Once his digits are gone from you, you stand up on weak legs just a little. Slowly, you lower yourself back down, watching the mirror as Ratchet holds himself in position before finding your mark.
Your mouth hangs open a little while watching yourself sink down onto his spike, taking his thick girth inch at a time while tossing your helm back against Ratchet's shoulder. You can hear his tense grunts as you clamp around him tightly, and let yourself sink fully into his lap again.
"Y/n..." He says your name, almost sounding desperate, like he was begging for something from you.
"Ratchet." You return the same as you give yourself a moment to adjust. "You feel so good."
Carefully, you start to move yourself, watching from the mirror as you see yourself moving along his spike entering your valve over again. His servo wraps around your front and comes to your node again, rubbing at you as he has a firm hold at your hip as you ride him. You're obsessed with the sight, and you know already you're going to want to use the hologram mirror again for yourselves.
Letting out heavy moans you grind down against Ratchet causing him to let out a surprised moan himself, holding a tighter hold as he presses his lips into your neck, glancing at the mirror whenever possible. You hold onto him as you ride his spike, letting out more blissful sounds that slowly grow more.
"Oh frag!" You curse out much louder, unable to hold it in.
"Such language doesn't suit you." Ratchet can't help himself, causing you to give a giggle through your moans.
"Then what suits me?"
"This."
He grabs hold of you tightly and thrusts his hips up against your movements at a rapid pace, causing you to let out a mewl. Looking at the mirror you are obsessed with the sight of you sitting against him, riding his spike, as he thrusts into you, causing the berth to start creaking under your harsh movements.
"Touch yourself."
You do that, using a free servo to bring down to yourself as you rub your node, digits skipping across the base of his moist spike as he enters you over again. Your thighs are spread wide, hanging across his own legs as you hump against his movements and moving in sync together. At this rate, you know you won't last too much longer.
Ratchet seems to read your mind. "Go on darling. Overload with me. Let yourself go."
That is all you needed to hear. Letting out a loud lingering mewl you fall apart and overload hard, watching yourself as your juices pool around the spike and under the both of you against the berth.
His heated vents against your shoulder turn into grunts before he lets out a harsher gnarl and you feel his warm trans fluids soak your depths. hips stilling, keeping inside you as you both sag against one another and the berth. With your optics still cascading at the mirror you are enjoying the sight while letting yourself vent and cool off as he did the same.
"That experiment was fun." You say through a giddy smile.
"Fun indeed. I have more ideas and experiments for us to try out for the future." The very thought makes you hum in delight.
"I look forward to all of them." You gently remove yourself from his spike and turn around, straddling him again and giving him a tender and loving kiss.
He kisses you back just as tenderly before your helms rest together.
"You think you can handle this old grumpy fool?"
"Absolutely." You answer while caressing his cheek plating.
"Fantastic."
There is nothing stopping either of you now.
Also, just to share because I can, this is the position that they had going. Let that invade your mind and consume your thoughts. 😍
#transformers#prime#ratchet#valveplug#ratchet x reader#reader insert#fanfiction#writing#smut#older mechs are always the best#ratchet has a thick spike and skillful servos#sugarrusheag
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@eddiemonth prompt, oct 16th: Library | Eyes on Fire - Blue Foundation | Curious
a/n: little Eddie & Wayne, ADHD!Eddie, pre-canon Eddie & Jonathan friendship. un-betaed because I'm challenging myself to write these in under an hour.
read on ao3 | ao3 masterpost here
All his life, all seven years of it so far, Eddie has been told to be quiet, to sit still, and to not touch things. He can’t help it most of the time– there are so many things to explore, and learn, and find, so many different textures to feel. Eddie learns best when he’s able to physically hold something in hands to help him focus and it’s gotten him into trouble on more than one occasion.
But living with Wayne, at least for the summer, he’s been given more opportunities than ever before to lean into his curious nature without being scolded. They’ve gone to museums, petting zoos, science centers, even the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Each new experience is a novelty and Eddie’s loved every single one of them. Today though, Eddie’s nervous.
“You almost ready, kid?” Wayne pokes his head into Eddie’s bedroom, warm smile and a cocked eyebrow. Eddie’s been taking his time, untying and retying his shoelaces over and over to stall.
“Uh, yeah! Yeah, I’m ready.” Eddie offers a tight smile, one that feels faux even to him.
“Do you not wanna go? We can try something else if the library isn’t your thing.”
Eddie shakes his head. “No, I wanna go! It’s just…”
Wayne enters the room fully, sitting down on the bed next to Eddie who fidgets with his fingers and looks down at the floor, his feet swaying back and forth over the edge of the bed.
“Just what?” He doesn’t touch him, but Wayne’s presence alone is comforting enough.
“What if I get in trouble? Aren’t you supposed to be super quiet and stuff in libraries?”
Eddie knows Wayne well enough by now to know that he’d never get in trouble that way that he has with his dad, but he doesn’t want to disappoint or embarrass Wayne, either.
“Well, yeah, on the grown up floor for the cranky old guys like me,” Wayne bumps his shoulder against Eddie’s, and Eddie can’t help but smile– real this time. “But there’s a whole children’s room that has games, lots of books, fun stuff. And if it feels like too much, you just give me our little signal and we’re outta there.”
When Eddie first started going places with Wayne, they’d developed their secret signal that probably wasn't too secret but worked just the same– Eddie would stand next to Wayne and step on his foot. Not hard, not enough to hurt, but enough that Wayne would notice, look down, and see Eddie’s overwhelm. And like promised, they’re outta there. No questions asked.
“Okay, I think I’m ready then.” Eddie stands up and heads toward the front of the trailer. “Let’s go.”
They’re at the library for all of a few minutes, Eddie hesitant to leave Wayne’s side as they scour the fantasy books, when he meets another kid around his age, maybe a little younger. Both boys go to reach for the same illustrated copy of a book about dragons.
“Oh, sorry, you can take it,” Eddie offers, moving his hand instinctually.
“No, no it’s okay, you were looking at it first. Go ahead.” The other boy responds, shrugging and looking back at the shelf.
There’s a woman behind him, smiling down fondly as she speaks. “Sweetie, why don’t you share with your new friend?”
“Yeah, if you wanna share, we could. Only if you want to though.” Eddie bounces on his heels, hopeful. He doesn’t get to make a lot of friends when he’s home with his parents.
“Okay, yeah,” the little boy smiles carefully and pulls the book from the shelf.
Eddie follows him to a small table at the end of the aisle and they pour over the pages, full of colorful illustrations and short stories. Eddie loses track of time, but he and his new friend, who he learns is named Jonathan, are just kids who don’t need to watch the clock.
They finish the book and return for another, and then another. Eddie's disappointed when the day ends and they have to leave, but he sees Wayne trade contact information with Jonathan's mom, Joyce.
"We'll see you again next week, Eddie. It was so nice to meet you." Joyce smiles, sweet and comforting, and Eddie isn't so afraid of the library anymore.
#eddie munson#eddie munson fic#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fanfiction#jonathan byers#joyce byers#wayne munson#stranger things#stranger things fic#stranger things fanfic#stranger things fanfiction#myblurbs#eddie month prompts#don't mind me just projecting a little onto eddie [fake surprise from the audience]
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JONATHAN AND GN!READER AND THEIR ANTICS !!!!!!!
Antics w/ Jonathan and Reader!
I did a similar post yesterday!! (Linked at the end, hopefully, I'm mobile and sometimes tumblr can be weird)
I'm so so sorry it took my so long to get this request <\\3 I was trying to come up with new ideas so it could be different than the other ask <\3, which I highly recommend checking out! Imma be real I'm not totally confident in how this one turned out so that second post can be like an extra/make up <\3
I wasnt sure if you wanted this to be platonic or have them dating so!! It's mostly written as vague in that department!!
Jonathan doesn't strike me as the person who goes out and does things a lot
Just. Wake up, work, home, sleep, repeat.. he'll sometimes send texts to friends and family to schedule a lunch here and there but
That's about it, hes not very social
So a lot of these antics are really going to be made through you making the plans; with the shenanigans really being unplanned byproducts
Honestly I can totally see Jonathan starting shit with someone, be it accident or on purpose, prompting both of yall having to hightail it out of the area
Reminds me of that part from one of the diary of a wimpy kid movies, where greg n rodrick do that fake puke prank on the guy and have to make a run for it
Actually I can totally see yall subtly being menaces and fucking with people
Maybe not a fake puke prank persay but
Yk?
No crime stuff; I only really see that becoming a thing after he becomes Spot! Both from how he worded his whole "turning to a life of crime" thing and the fact he just
Lacks the experience and confidence
Moving on
Maybe it's just my "let's get silly with the writing" part of me, or it's my need for chaos (arguably the same thing), but
I feel like
Somehow, you guys would accidentally probably maybe kinda sorta
Wreak havoc in ways spot could only dream of (before doing the whole. Bouncing across the multiverse thing)
Yall could probably start the day wanting to go to some food truck and
End it by spending a night in jail
Neither of you are allowed anywhere near food trucks after that /j
No but serious note, Jonathan is basically a hermit, he doesnt like leaving his apartment unless he has to; people are just, so
Eeuuughchk!
So when you two hang out it's either his place or yours
But that's not to say it isnt fun!
Hes got normal stuff people have in their homes, like board games and consoles
And also science doohickies
Yeah people have that in their houses, that's a normal thing
Ngl if you give him any ideas for machines or whatnot hes totally going to give it a try
See previous post with a trans s/o, he would make the transgenderinator if you asked him to
Well now hes just turning into doof
Ykw
I feel like he'd take you to alchemax to show off stuff but like
If you asked nicely
How can he say no to that face?
And also he has no backbone
That's not to say you would pressure him, though! Because that's not cool, dont pressure people. But like, he would cave in the way of "I know it's not that serious and I know they'll probably understand if I say no, but I don't want to ever risk disappointing them ever in my life, so I'm gonna say yes!" Kind of way
He just like me frfr
And this is assuming you even know about alchemax
Which personally, unless you're in some way associated with it, I'm p sure be would have a strong boundary to keep you out of it
This is really just turning into a general ramble <\3
Anyways
I dont have many ideas since I struggle with general hcs like this but!! Yeah!! Definitely recommend the linked post for a better more cohesive (?) List of ideas and hcs!! This post kinda
Made me realize I dont have many hcs for Jonathan outside of making his personality a smart pathetic science man
Gotta fix that , give him some hobbies n stuff in the future
Link to a similar post!
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Mastermind - Recoms x Singer!Recom!reader
(A/N: heyy... hey.. im back :3. im sorry for leaving for SO LONG im dealing with a lot of personal stuff right now but im really trying to write more. i want to get faster at typing and i also needa feed my children. also most of this fic will be exposition and the events leading up to the climax like im not even joking its so long. hope yall enjoy this one. mwah) (and yes I based the songs on Taylor Swift and if you're gonna be in the replies being hateful, gtfo my page (kindly))
What if I told you I'm a mastermind?
And now you're mine.
I had always hid my true past from my teammates. Practically everyone. I only really had a journal, and even that was locked away under my rug under my bed. Nobody knew it was there, and nobody could access it without waking me up or making some kind of noise. It was a sacred book to me. I could talk to... something with it. I could express my feelings of wanting to go back to the way things were, but never wanting to leave Pandora. Never wanting to leave my friends. And never wanting to leave my lovers.
I'm a recombinant for the RDA. When I died in my human body, they had my DNA and were already growing my new body to be revived. I have my memories of my past life, and it was awesome. Until... my mom found out she was drafted for the mission on Pandora. I, being the best kid ever, took her place. My fans were scared for me, and tried to convince me not to. They'd heard it all, how dangerous Pandora was. Especially for a singer with no military experience or knowledge. But I accepted my fate. For my mother. For my family. I had siblings back home, and with me going on tour all the time, I wouldn't be able to take care of them if my mother was gone. So I accepted the fact that I was most likely, if not definitely, going to die on this mission.
And I did. My family recieved the news, but also learned about Project Phoenix. They were relieved to know that their kid was going to be revived, just maybe not the same.
-----
"Hey, ma. How're you?" Prager asked as I sat down at the table. It was lunch at the cafeteria. They pretty much just fed us protein-filled slop most of the time. Rarely, they would throw a cookie in there if it was a holiday on Earth.
"Oh, it's going alright, baby. Thanks. Hey, can I ask you a question?" I replied. Prager nodded and leaned in. "Do you think you could ask the Colonel if we could go out in the forest today and just... explore? He doesn't know this, but I actually have some science friends and they showed me some fruits and animals that we can harvest and safely eat. I tried some and Pandora food is good. Like, really good. I wanna surprise the team, and you know Colonel can't say no to you."
Prager agreed and once the Colonel sat at our table, he immediately started.
"Colonel, I was wondering if we could go out into the forest today and just have some fun. Explore, fuck around in some river or something?" Quaritch looked at Prager and gave that ONE sigh. (A/N: its giving "go get my purse") "Fine. But we ain't bringing a baby viperwolf home because Ja wants one." He glared at Ja. He was always the one to see a stray dog and say "please please pleaaaaase mom can we adopt it??" as a kid.
I silently thanked Prager for doing my bidding as always.
-----
We were out in the forest, going over the rules we've memorized by heart now. Once the Colonel finished up, I immediately took off. I was so excited to get some nice food that I didn't realize the cliff drop below me. I was suddenly falling, the wind rushing past my body and feeling almost painful as it hit my face and went away so fast, over and over again.
I dived head first into a lake. The drop wasn't that bad, I realized. Alicia was first on the scene, peeking over the dropoff with a worried look on her face as she hoped to God I wasn't dead. I waved my hand up at her and called out.
"Get down here, this is so fun!! Don't be afraid to get a running start either!" my voice echoed. "Are you okay??" she shouted back. "I'm amazing!!"
Alicia ran over to the others and told them to watch her. She embraced her inner child as she ran as fast as she could and leaped off the cliff. She felt the wind rush past her face as I had, and splashed in the water with me. The rest of my team ran over and looked. We were... fine? Lopez was next. He gladly jumped and plooshed in with us. Then Prager, Zhang, Walker, Warren, Mansk, Lyle, Fike, and finally... Quaritch. He took a chance and jumped.
We were playing and splashing each other with water as we finally relaxed for once. Of course, we had fear of predators. But we didn't care as much anymore. We were playing like kids and it felt so good.
-
After we dried off and got back to the forest, I took off again. This time, more careful. I found an abandoned basket in pretty good condition and took it with me to collect fruits and veggies. I collected some yovo fruit, some other stuff I didn't know the name of but still knew was safe, and finally it was time to get some meat. I was looking to make some nice Pandora burritos for everyone. I found a nice bow and some arrows, perhaps forgotten by a young hunter excited to show their family their haul.
While I was gathering food, one of my favorite songs got stuck in my head while I was thinking about my life back on Earth. I started humming... then singing the lyrics... then full belting the long notes. I didn't realize Lyle was near, close enough to hear but far enough to stay hidden. He'd never heard my songs because he was in the military before I even debuted. I'm sure he was confused who I was singing.
I got some hexapede meat, some meat from hard fruits, and I also took down a lone viperwolf. I put the stuff in the basket to bring home.
-
"What the Hell is all of this? What've you been doing this entire time? Why do you have a bow? Did you encounter a native?" Colonel asked. I said I found it and saw no booby traps so I took it. I explained that my friends at the lab wanted some samples so I got some for them. Obviously it was a lie, but I couldn't spoil the surprise.
He allowed me to take my findings and harvest home. I thanked him and was so excited to make him and our team a good meal for once.
-----
I got out my cutting board and my cooking knife and started chopping. I cooked some of that chicken-y stuff and some of that fruit. I thanked Mansk in my head for teaching me these things.
-
I radio'd everyone to come to my room. I said I had a surprise for them. "I swear to God, if we get there and you're on the bed naked again I will... actually not be mad." Lyle said back.
"This isn't that kind of surprise, Lyle. Just get over here!"
Once they all were in the room, I retrieved a tray with foil over it. The smell wafted into the room as I uncovered the gift. They were all so surprised and hypnotized by the burritos.
"For you guys! You deserve it. Take one, I insist!" I squealed. They all grabbed one and a paper towel and with the first bite, they relaxed their tense muscles and rolled their eyes back. They hadn't had a good meal like this in a good, long while.
"Hey, Y/N, what song were you singing in the forest? You were really loud... must've been one of your favorites or something. Is it on Spotify?" Lyle asked as he finished his first bite. My eyes widened. "You... heard that?"
"Yeah, I heard a little bit too. It was something about a new romantic or something like that." Zdinarsk added. "Yeah you were singing about something related to rings or something too." Mansk said. "I don't know, I could be wrong, but last time I checked, you weren't married." Lopez said.
"Um... can we forget all of that happened? Sorry, I was just getting carried away and I sang some of my own songs and-" I was soon cut off by the Colonel saying, "Wait- your songs?"
I soon shoved them out of my room, begging them to let it go and to not talk about it again. I closed the door behind me as I slid down the metal wall to the floor. I took some big, deep breaths and checked under my bed to check if my journal and hard drives were still there, even though I'd been with them the entire time. Phew! They're still there. I thought.
-----
The next day, at dinner in the cafeteria, I brought my bag with me and sat down with everybody acting like nothing was wrong. Conversation sparked when someone asked, "So what's everyone planning on doing tomorrow? Ardmore gave us the day off." I said I was planning on bingeing my favorite show wrapped in my blankets with my favorite foods. They all agreed and said they would be training, sleeping, exploring, hooking up, or something fun/relaxing.
I suddenly got a call from my friend on the phone. I knew it was something important, because my phone was blowing up with texts while she was waiting for me to answer. I hurriedly ran off to my room for privacy, forgetting my bag full of personal stuff. Including my hard drives. Zdog decided it couldn't hurt to see what I carry around all day, so she started digging. She found my sunglasses, hairbrush/comb, an unopened soda can, some loose candy, and... hard drives?
"Hey does anyone know why Y/N has hard drives in her bag?" Z asked. Nobody knew, so she decided to take them and pass them out for them to watch later. It for sure wasn't porn, Ardmore would've never let it through. It's gotta be some home videos or something.
-----
Zdog and the others piled onto the bed in her room and uploaded the drives onto her computer. They were numbered. They watched the first one and it was a black screen with the sound of a crowd cheering. It was around an hour long. They watched as a... stage appeared. A big one. It was a stadium full of people. A concert? Then appeared the person performing. It was... you. Some already made the connections, while others took a little bit. You were performing for around 70,000 people along with cameras so everyone could watch it live. they watched all of the hard drives all throughout the night, only falling asleep when they went through all of them.
-----
You were in your room, hanging up the call. turns out it was just some cute guy flirted with her at a restaurant. Only then did you realize that you left your bag in the cafeteria. You immediately went back for it, checking everything was there because people just love to snoop. You realized all of your hard drives were missing. You soon were banging on the Colonel's door, asking if he'd seen anybody take them or had anything in their hands. He wasn't there. You knocked on everyone's door and nobody answered. You went back to your room, wailing into your pillow. Those drives were the last thing you had of Earth. Of your entire life before the military. Soon enough, you cried yourself to sleep. In the morning, you slept in. It was your day off, after all. You heard a knock on the door. You recognized it as Z. You opened the door and there she was. She came in without an invite and immediately sat on your bed.
"Y/N. I am... just so sorry. When you left your bag in the cafeteria, I looked through it when I should've respected your privacy. I found hard drives and took all of them to my room and the rest of the team and I watched all of them. In order. All the way through. I am so sorry for disrespecting your right to privacy and watching the videos that were obviously private." She closes her eyes softly, looking down toward the floor with her hands twiddling in her lap. Too embarrassed and disappointed with herself to even look at me.
"Z, I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have been so secretive. Especially with the ones who love me most. The truth is, I was a very rich and famous singer on Earth. You probably know that by now. So does everyone else. But I'm trying to work through it and not be embarrassed to share my past."
"It's not your fault. I love you. We love you. You never have to hide anything from us, but if you don't want it to be shared, that's okay too. So... can we listen to some of your songs?" Z laughed. I said yes an radio'd everyone to come to my room. I had a surprise.
MWAH I love yall!!!! hope you guys enjoyed i've had this au stuck in my head since like last year :) 💋💋
@dyingofcookies ITS HERE BESTIE
#zdinarsk#avatar zdog#recom zdog#z dog#z dog x y/n#recom lyle wainfleet#recom squad#recom quaritch#recom mansk#recom oc#james cameron avatar#original character#avatar x reader
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BL Reclist - Part 4
Hello hello, here I am with another BL rec list no one asked for 😌 I’ve been reading a lot these days, while I wait for my fandom spark to come back. Most of these manhwas are still ongoing which means I’ve been busy with: alpha x alpha romance! Break up make up! Identity porn! Revenge! Mafia love triangles! It’s all here folks, pick your poison and have fun. If you’re looking for completed works, better start with 4, 8 and 9. You can also check my previous BL lists here, here and here for a few more completed series. I know these lists are a bit niche and not very popular but who knows, maybe I’ll find fellow BL fans who will enjoy these as much as I did!
1. Aren’t You My Type? by Ha tae jin / Toffee (M, ongoing)
Geon-ah responds to Hyun-dal's message, who mistook him for Hye-sung. As they continue to communicate, they grow closer and closer, their first face-to-face meeting seems like it will never come. An alpha x alpha romantic comedy that starts with a misunderstanding!
2. Blaze Out by Chepali, Zelnut & Kkoyo (E, ongoing)
Once a promising high school baseball player, Yeon Hong’s bright future is shattered by a tragic car accident, leading him to uncover the involvement of private loan sharks. Seeking revenge, he transforms into a loan shark himself, establishing “Coco Loan.” However, twelve years later, Hong’s journey takes a surprising turn when the powerful President Yoo Jaeyoung orders Hong to mentor his mysterious lover, ‘Panther.’
3. God’s Identity Card by Ni sansui & Djun (M, ongoing)
Lu Lanqiao, a forensic science student, became the most likely suspect in the murder of his elder brother overnight. His brother's last words put him on the run. While trying to find out who killed his brother, Lanqiao meets Fu Cheng, the police inspector who was hot on his trail. However, the relationship between the fugitive and the pursuer gradually changes.
4. Here U Are by Djun (M, complete)
Receptioning the newcomers is a task for YuYang, and he ends up helping the unsociable and towering LiHuan, the kind of person that does everything to be disliked. But after better knowing each other, he discovers that the giant isn’t that bad of a person at all.
5. Payback by Samk & Fujoking (E, ongoing)
While other students were preparing to take their CSAT exams, Lee Yoonhan was swept up in an exhilarating lifestyle of crime and debauchery. While working for a loan shark, karma catches up to him when a family member dies from an act of revenge against him. After years of repenting for his sins and trying to turn over a new leaf, he meets a man in the entertainment industry who gives him the opportunity to get his revenge.
6. Private Scandal by Totiko (E, ongoing)
Known as the muse of a renowned designer, Iliyan Moore has achieved almost everything a model could want: celebrity status, money, full bookings…and a reputation as a man-seducing home wrecker. Stalked by the paparazzi and harassed by an obsessed boss with a jealous wife, Iliyan is on guard against everyone around him. So, one could only imagine his shock when dashing Kyle Hackman manages to effortlessly charm his way past his defenses and into his bed on their first meeting.
7. Sparkling Baby by Zec (E, ongoing)
Due to a recent heartbreak, Hanjoon arrives in New York. Not only is he delighted to meet a Korean in an unfamiliar city, he has a one-night stand with him. "I should've asked for his name." However, these two end up meeting again years later, in an unusual place. Where will their one-night stand lead them to? Spin off from Lover Boy, featuring side character Baek Hanjoon.
8. Spring, the Color of Love by Chepali & Park Ji-yeon (M, complete)
"Je te veux. I want you." Cheongsun and Gonghyeon meet as college students, but their different social background and experience lead to a painful falling out. Ten years later, the two meet again in the world of hotel management and get to reminisce about their short spring love all those years before.
9. Unintentional Love Story by Pibi (M, complete)
Wonyoung gets unjustly suspended from work after getting caught up in a corruption scandal. When he accidentally discovers the chairman's favorite artist Yoon Taejun living under an alias, he is tasked with a tricky new mission. Could this be Wonyoung's chance to get his job back?
10. Wet Sand by Doyak (E, ongoing)
Click. A thoughtless finger slip leads Jo to snap a picture of Ian smoking on his balcony - and thus, their fates begin to intertwine. Jo can't stop fantasizing about the tall, handsome stranger on the balcony, and grabs any chance to get to know him better. Unfortunately, he doesn't realize that Ian does the dirty work for one of the region's largest, most unsavory gangs... and is the lover of one of their most powerful people.
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“Ink Blots”
4/5
for @krikeymate
—————————————————————————
June 21st, 2019
Dear Sam,
The summer solstice. The longest day of sunlight in the whole year.
I remember that you used to force me to stay awake, and savor every drop of sunlight. Some years we spent it at the beach, some in the backyard, some on the roof of the twins house. It didn’t matter where we spent it, as long as we were together.
Amber picked up on our plans. She now makes me spend the day with her, holding her hand at the county fair and riding the tilt-a-whirl until I get ill. I hate spinning. But it makes her happy.
How do you spend your summer solstice? Do you stay outside all day? Or do you hide?
I wish I could hide. The sun doesn’t shine quite as bright without you.
Your sunshine, Tara.
—
August 1st, 2019
Dear Sam,
It’s been a muggy, humid summer. I can’t go outside without my hair sticking to my face and my clothes damp. It’s disgusting.
The bad news is, our air conditioner is broken. Has been since early July. Mom never paid the bill, so the city shut it off. I’ve been working non stop at the local Dairy Queen, but surprise surprise. Minimum wage doesn’t pay shit. It’s not like I can do anything with my checks anyways. Most of it goes to house bills.
Luckily Amber lets me sleep over. I’ve been practically living there. It’s been nice, being in a house where mothers act like mothers, and fathers stay. Plus the dinners and A/C. It’s been nice.
I hope wherever you are, you have air conditioning. And popsicles. I know you like Helado de coco. Papi used to pick those up from the taquería on the way home from work. You used to spill it everywhere and get me all sticky when you hugged me.
I’d kill for a coconut-y, sticky hug right about now.
Love, Tara.
—
October 3rd, 2019
Dear Sam,
Junior year is kicking my ass. I can’t remember the last time school challenged me this much.
You were always so good at school. So bright. So good at math and science. Unlike you though, I am a whizz at English. Seriously! I can write like no other.
I’m now the Chief Editor of the newspaper. Ms. Smith put a lot of faith in me to be able to handle a staff. I'm not very good at it. Leading people isn’t very natural for me. It is for you, though.
Chad is the captain of the football team, Mindy the captain of the debate club. Amber was made captain of the forensics team. We’re all growing up, Sam.
The kids you used to spend so much time doting on, feeding, changing; are all grown. Not really. I won’t be eighteen for a bit. But still.
I hope you know we think of you everyday. I do at least. Chad likes to talk about the sleepovers you held for us, and Mindy wishes you were here to help with calculus. Amber gets an odd look when we talk about you, but I don’t care enough to ask.
Sending you love, Tara.
—-
December 14th, 2019
Dear Sam,
I am seventeen. Does anything special happen at seventeen?
Mindy stuffed so many balloons in my locker, that when I opened it, a bunch exploded. That wasn’t a very fun principal office experience.
It wasn’t my first time there, though. I try to keep my nose clean, but I still sniff after danger. I mean, you left me Sam. I know what you did in high school. The teachers know.
I want some danger, too. I want to know what it was like for you to disappear and leave me. I want to know what forced you to leave me.
So I drink. I smoke. I have an ID. I drove drunk once.
It doesn’t matter. I don’t really care. As long as I graduate and leave, that’s all that matters.
Happy Birthday to me. I’ll pretend you said it to me.
Tara.
—
January 1st, 2020
Dear Ssmmy,
i can’t see straight and i miss you so much do you know that
but it’s new year and i’m seventeen and i have all these beliefs that you broke why does it matter
hope it’s nice where you are
i love you tara
—
March 24th, 2020
Dear Sam,
It’s been a minute. I’m sorry. Time has moved so fast, but also, not at all.
Chad won state of the basketball team. A buzzer-beater shot. Whatever that means. He picked me up and spun me around after he won. There’s a photo in the newspaper of it. I don’t like him like that, but he's my brother. I love him like that.
Mindy took the debate team to nationals. They got second place. I watched her on the shitty livestream. She was incredible Sam. You would’ve been so proud. She’s always been a genius argumentalist. Ever since she was young.
Amber won first in her forensics division. Something about stab victims and their criminal family. It creeped me out how much eye contact she made with me. I didn’t love that.
I just write for the newspaper and sling ice cream.
What do you do? Are you happy? Does life still pass you by? Or do you live?
Love, Tara.
—
April 19th, 2020
Dear Sam,
Well, AP season is upon us. I signed up for five.
I’ll ace maybe three. Environmental science, Spanish, and English literature. The other two are math. I’m not good at math, but perhaps it’ll work.
I stumbled upon a photo of us when we were young. Twas the night you taught me how to bake cookies. I had so much flour in my hair. How did that happen? Did I bathe in it? Doesn’t matter. I just love seeing your big smile, always directed at me.
Sometimes if I close my eyes I can still feel your smile on my face. Like the sunlight from the solstice.
Better go back to studying. One of us has to go to college and become master of the universe. I know you aren’t in college. It was never your speed.
Once I make a shit ton of money, I’ll come find you.
I promise.
Love, Tara.
—
May 17th, 2020
Dear Sam,
I passed ⅘ of my tests. Failed the physics one. No surprise there. I skipped that class at least three times a week.
I’m almost done with Junior year. And then I’ll be a senior. One step closer to leaving.
We didn’t have heating or a/c through the past few seasons. I can’t make enough money to keep us afloat. Mom works, but she’s out of the country more often than not. And gas bills are not forgiving, let me tell you that.
I’m moving into Amber’s house for the summer. I can’t survive another couple of months dying from sweating.
Your birthday/leaving anniversary is soon. You’re gonna be twenty-two. That should be fun, yeah?
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
Love, Tara.
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5d ~ Connection
Are you connected or not?
As I was doing reading since I recorded just wrote what I was sayong so some parts are weird. The reading turn out to be rather to be a yes or no type of reading.
Pile one -The beginning
Magican and Queen of swords ( Reverse)
You have a lot to prepare for and an important relationship with yourself. Becoming more self-aware and knowing what you want to create Manifesting your purpose and being the source itself You could be comparing yourself to others right now, but you need to feel that spark. You will have a lot of thoughts about creating new projects and finishing old ones. With Queen of Swords energy, overanyaliziny, and look deep into You need to get into that masculine energy to put out the energy of that project.
It reminds me of a scene from Abbott Elementary where the older gentleman tells the young teacher that even a dream can be distracting and that sometimes focusing on one path may miss other opportunities. It's okay to not be perfect when you do random hobbies just for fun doing magic around just hexing and focusing heavily on the negative side of things. I say that not to shame anyone, just saying that there will always be people talking behind your back, wishing bad things on you, because misery loves company.
Bring back the focus to yourself, and this person will be your friend. You won't know who this person is because of your connection to them. There are a lot of dreams where you don't remember what happened because you need to focus on your world instead of the one outside yourself.
The queen of pentacles is here for the future, as she is connected to her own spirituality. She is grounded, and that means she is calm and centered. She is ignoring any BS that comes her way and is just in that meditative state. In the future, be more confident and just know that this is the person you are meant to be with.
Messages: "Connected with Spirit" more. You compare science to spirituality. to tune into your higher self. acknowledge the spirit. "I know that love is a creative force." Someone has suffered a lot in a romantic relationship. Through connecting with someone, you are hoping that they will change for the better. For falling for that potential and that love, it's just more the maternal instinct that kicks in. Not shaming those that are in that relationship of being in need. (feeling of drain)
You can be with someone well-known and others will try to drag the connection that day. as you don't always look for validation from others but look toward yourself. Remember, love is the creative force and the highest virtue. Love will set you free.
~~~~~~~~~
Person A
naturally connected spirit, innocent side, their own inner child, and look younger than their age; also, someone that has so much wisdom. On another note, have you ever noticed how some kids are more naturally drawn to older music and have so much knowledge? These kids can come from such a loving place and be old souls just from that higher realm. So that being said, some can have a spirit child around them. So if you're all feeling more playful all of a sudden, the message is for those that want family. Dreaming or having an astral experience, it is possible that this can be your future. The last message is related to going back and doing things you did as a child.
Person B
They always treat everyone around them with respect, and they especially treat elders well. Going back to the queen of pentacles, she represents warmth, the feeling of "home sweet home," mother earth, and wealth. You wouldn't know it by looking at her, but everything flows to her.
One person will feel the other first, and they will both be focused on the spiritual, but for now both are focused on material wealth. They will meet in the middle of the spiritual. It can occur that you meet the person and having a kid will open you up to the divine, and you will be happy. Some of you may already be in a union with someone and be having a hard time having a baby. The message here is that a child should come and be a gift from the heavens.
May peace be with you all
Pile two - Happy Ever After
The highest priest—someone who is aware of connection—and both of your higher selves have met. Will they remember that it happened? No, but the higher priest will, so the person will be like, "Why does this person feel so familiar?" Some of you have been serving other people for a while and may be a bit tired.You haven't given birth to it manifesting in reality just yet. You rush to help others even when they don't ask for it. You can be overgiving to yourself, have you drink water, have you shower, and have you breathe in a quiet room. You guys are also natural healers, tarot readers, astral travelers, and engage in some type of spiritual practice; of you guys, I heard Rekiki. The meeting place happens while at work, as they will see you in service and applaud you.
Some of you had been broken up with, and the relationship just went completely opposite of where you thought it would be. It just flipped flopped as you were in the talking stage, being all romantic, and then that person just randomly said, "No, we were never a thing" (couple).
In the next card, the woman is supposed to be working, but she is daydreaming while looking out the window. She is looking at the big city outside of work, and the message here is not to worry about material wealth.
The message here is that things aren't always good just because someone seems to have it all. Most of them care so much about their social appearance that they don't live for themselves.
For some, a meeting with someone who will be their partner is necessary because, as you know, as above and below. Don't worry about how the meeting will take place, as that is in the spirit, which means you will be where you need to be. As you will find yourself knowing the truth about previous relationships, you can then let go. They each have wealth from a hidden source and have strong attraction to each other.
So go from being a high priestess as the meeting in your mind and now the future of temperance that comes in to have that masculine and feminine in balance that perfect alchemical marriage. There can also be a past-life relationship with your partner in which you worked closely together.
As of right now, the person is ready for the connection, but I do feel that will come later.
The lesson for you or your partner will be to set boundaries as it comes through the 5th chakra in the throat, to say no and walk away from negative people. In the father archetype of the nore shadow side aspect, and as they are used to having the most responsibilities as being the breadwinner, They need to know that they can rely on others for help. That it will also help them to be in their creative energy. They can have a lot of ancient knowledge and be good at science. The other energy is warrior spirit, and the energy here is sacral charkha. They can be feeling sexual, but can also put that energy into being creative. (Third Charkha) As they are in the enigma energy and the high priestess moment. The number nine can be symbolic of rebuilding yourself, as can the lyrics to the song, "Better than I Thought."
As that person, your clinging self or your partner, will let go of that and be in a better place mentally, that things overall will be better than you thought.
Pile 3 the preclude
You've been putting in so much effort and just working your asses off. Life has put you on the strongest warrior list this year. The message of the Knight of Cups is that everything will be okay and that life is preparing you for the next phase.
Your person will normally be on your mind all the time. They will be a poem of some sort, and your connection will be through some rhyme. property, music, or art you see as a message from their higher self. That person can also be very young and defend themselves against online attacks.
The relationship was very emotional and confusing. There is someone that will be heading toward you. The only thing with the 7 wands is guarded, and the stories where you read about someone who feels that person is too good to be true. The main character just wants to run away, which is why your partner will feel the energy of your resistance. They will not give up easily in love, as they have already been through the ringer, meaning that they have expended all of their energy fighting for their lives.
For some, you dealt with a more of a feeling of being raised in place with a lack of physical touch regarding getting hugs and pats on the back. instead of receiving the punishment of being hit for being punished. The person could come into a wealthy family and you wont really known it of course jusr for few.
The person is just trying to leave behind their family, as religion is taken seriously and used in harmful ways. Or they come from being raised by parents who keep track of their every move.
You can be coming into wealth soon, or some type of authority figure will be helping you out more with wealth. Bringing you closer to creating your purpose in life, and in the readings, a lot of endings will take place. More focus on being with others and going out more often.
Person A is the villain and is destroying everything around you. A lot of people know and recognize each other, but I don't think the person will. I now feel the connection more strongly.
While person B is the trickster, it is giving Bonnie and Clyde. Enimies to lovers. Romeo and Juliet trick everyone with their deaths.
Person B has the ability to transform any problem and find solutions. The energy here is everyone thinking that person B is this type of person with a one-dimensional type of thinking, but they are able to grow beyond that type of person.
Person A is more in their shadow aspect but is also learning that it's okay to be the bad guy sometimes.
Sometimes you have to set boundaries and show others you're not one to mess with. Building a strong foundation (1st charkha) and creative mindset (2nd charkha)
You can be a very attractive couple, and that can bring in that jealousy. Once you get into your own power, you just want to, for example, wear whatever you want. Being in your creative. energy and show the world. I will have more dreams and receive more messages and signals. cards : 8 of hearts , 8 of spades 8 of clubs , king of diamonds and 2 of diamonds . Can be high sexual tension to.
They are still learning to be able to grow, and a mentor can be brought in. This can be you if you have a mentor coming in. So after that happens, more focus is placed on the spiritual side of things.
Pile four The climax
The star is a yes for sure that you have met your person in that 5d . In the in-between, as you can see in the card, she is attuned to herself. The star energy is hope, and your person spends a lot of time in solitude, so that explains why their connection is greater than the others that I have read so far. They can do temple stays, visit holy places, and explore travel.
In the past, you dealt with love that was just for convenience. This person will love you while you're sick, even if you have nothing, and that is unconditional love. You may meet the person on vacation because I told you something about currency exchange. When you meet this person, your ex or their ex will try to wreck the relationship. They do have success for them, but that's why they love convenience. If you do decide to go after that person, some couples will separate but still stay away from that person who is trying to wreck the relationship. A year apart, and the song is dancing in September, so you may meet again in the fall or winter.
You will know that your partner is the one because they want a family and will show you lots of affection. You ask them why they like you or why you fall for me. Who will have that honest, good answer?
In the future, they will feel enlightenment. Both of you are the same page fourth chakra on fourth pile twice. Both will be working in your heart, so you will feel that you can tell this person anything and that they won't judge. So it can be a time where you help the person out and they can be sending you healing energy at random times. The detective energy sends you signs and hints as they are trying to manifest you in the soulmate letters.
Person A is friendly and in a state of energy to let go of grunge. settling their conflict and learning about their homeland, their ancestors, and themselves.
Person B can be a new love whom you met in the spiritual but haven't met in the spiritual. Have a child here or want a child? As I am doing my reading, I think of that issue that I mention eailer as I hear a woman outside yell at their child, thinking back to that intense childhood. Ace of Wands, that energy can be sexual chemistry.
Marriage of convenience pops up twice... don't settle for less, as the spirit will bring you the person that you need and seek.
The song "Timeless" by TigerJk ft. RM
We are all one, and we are all connected. Life is cyle recarnated , we are here , we recanarted.
Eye of the storm: in between states
has to deal with rebirth, and that your life will change when you meet the person.
In the past, you dealt with love that was just for convenience. This person will love you while you're sick, even if you have nothing, and that is unconditional love. You may meet the person on vacation because I hear something about currency exchange. When you meet this person, your ex or their ex will try to wreck the relationship. They do have success for them, but that's why they love convenience. If you do decide to go after that person, some couples will separate but still stay away from that person who is trying to wreck the relationship. A year apart, and the song is dancing in September, so you may meet again in the fall or winter.
You will know that your partner is the one because they want a family and will show you lots of affection. You ask them why they like you or why you fall for me. Who will have that honest, good answer?
In the future, they will feel enlightenment. Both of you are the same page fourth chakra on fourth pile twice. Both will be working in your heart, so you will feel that you can tell this person anything and that they won't judge. So it can be a time where you help the person out and they can be sending you healing energy at random times. The detective energy sends you signs and hints as they are trying to manifest you in the soulmate letters.
Person A is friendly and in a state of energy to let go of grunge. settling their conflict and learning about their homeland, their ancestors, and themselves.
Person B can be a new love whom you met in the spiritual but haven't met in the spiritual. Have a child here or want a child? As I am doing my reading, I think of resentment as I hear a woman outside yell at their child, thinking back to that intense childhood. Ace of Wands, that energy can be sexual chemistry.
Marriage of convenience pops up twice... don't settle for less, as the spirit will bring you the person that you need and seek.
The song "Timeless" by TigerJk ft. RM
"My soul's like a burning pheonix
Drunken Tiger over Loptimist's rhythm
The wind splits the foggy sea in half, time travel
When our eyes close in the end, our journey's destination is the same
Our bodies are merely borrowed vessels returned to earth when we pass, time table
Mid-dreaming in the eye of the storm and still suffering
Roaming with no destination but my aim is sure-fire" Matches well with the ace of wands
We are all one, and we are all connected. Life is cyle recarnated , we are here , we recanarted.
Eye of the storm: in between states
has to deal with rebirth, and that your life will change when you meet the person.
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Wolfstack's Ticking Time Bomb | Hard Mode Guide
Are you guys having fun with the new World Event? I know I am. I am having so much fun with my runs (and only 1 self-explosion so far) that I've decided to write up a guide for it!!!
There's around 14.000 of the World Quality left so we don't have all that much time to continue. If you just want to experience the travel, do a medium/easy run!
An Easy run is especially worth it if you just unlocked the ship, even. And the event is very cool!!!! The fear! The tension! The tick-tock of the bombs as you drag the bulk of your ship through the sharp rocks and winding paths, heart racing, eyes full of terror.
The doubt! The way you grow increasingly afraid, increasing terrified, thinking of anything, any solution at all to get out of this problem you have gotten yourself in. The maddening sound, the warmth, the desperation, the growing threat of mutiny quelled only be the ever more terrible threat of an explosive demise.
This might be the *best* out of all the Living World Events we got so far!
Alrighty, so to the guide part.
First out of everything- admit that you are not going to be able to succeed in the checks. It's fine, if you're lategame to try and go for the medium ones, but the checks in the hardmode can reach up to 24 Zeefaring to 100%.
Yeah, it's genuinely insane. So, ignore them.
But if you can't use half the cards- how will you, a zailor of quality, finish this event's hardmode and get a nice new quality for your mantelpiece?
Here are some recommendations.
First of all, grind as much Strong-Backed Labour as you possibly can. I actually recommend either:
The Bazaar Side-Streets (marginally more efficient with underclay. Don't worry about the 3.50E you've just spent- this event can reach 8 EPA in hardmode, even if you don't have the needed Zeefaring.)
The Southwark statue in Jericho Locks. It's the best option for SBL, bar none, though it requires card draw.
In any other circumstance, I'd tell you to go for the Underclay, but this event is genuinely so profitable the Bazaar Side-Streets become a viable option. Every action you save is worth its weight in gold.
Get *as much SBL as possible.* 6-9 is the absolute minimum in my opinion.
Second: Stock up on Second Chances. Specifically, Dangerous chances. Keep your Suspicion below 5 as well so you can draw a certain very good card in zee.
Next: keep your Troubled Waters low. A bit of pirating here and there isn't too harmful- it doesn't really increase TW that much over the regular cards.
Keep at least one TW-reducing card in your hand, so you can use them to switch regions from Home Waters to London and from Stormbones to the event location. If you have more then one TW-reducing card in your hand, lower your TW, but always make sure to change regions with a TW-lowerer.
This is because your hand is wiped on region change, so to minimize TW you need to do this!
Good cards for TW reduction:
"A Corvette of Her Majesty's Navy,"
"The Wax-Wind" (if you have a zub)
"What do the Drownies Sing?" (if you have a Drownie Effluvia from Fruits of the Zee)
"A Giant Angler Crab" (specifically "Ready the guns and fire at its soft spots" option, reducing TW by 2 CP).
When you get there, every level of TW will be converted into the event menace, Volatility, and reaching 8 volatility will blow you up.
Now, you got to the hard part.
Most likely then not, you are not going to be able to do the advanced checks here, so keep to the Watchful check (which is super easy) and the Dangerous check (which is amazing)! They are, respectively, 'Steady! Steady!' and 'No way! There's no way!' and they will be your salvation.
Those second chances? Those are for the Dangerous check. Never play the Red Science check unless you're very very endgame and utterly loaded on that stat.
(I enjoyed the game telling me that 10% RS check is, incredibly, safer option than the one that has an actual chance of success and I can spend a second chance on.)
There are, at first, only 4 cards in deck, so you can keep drawing and playing those two.
By the time you have Progress to the Admiralty Depot 5, you start drawing a (bad) card called 'Now! Now!'
It's not very good. It has an insanely difficult check which you should never roll on, and an option that spends 1-3 Labours for some guaranteed progress.
When you draw this card, take a deep breath and check your Volatility. Is it below 4? Is it at most halfway to 5? If it is and your progress is *not* 6 or 7, you can bite the bullet and do a zeefaring check to draw again. You can take the damage. If it isn't, simply spend the SBL and draw again.
The card 'We're not going to make it!' has a slightly lower amount of damage dealt to you so pick it, if this happens.
Now, have you drawn 'Steady! Steady!' or 'No way! There's no way!' in your new draw?
Play those.
Now, draw again and hope for one of those two.
If you draw a Zeefaring check again, sigh mournfully and spend the SBL.
Rinse and repeat- even if you have the worst luck ever, 9 SBL should be enough to get you there.
And congratulations! Your heart is racing, your breath is hot- but you have earned your bounty.
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The "stinky" Larry
-Bro, are you serious? You've only been in my body a couple of days and you're already screwing? when was the last day did you take a shower? - The "stinky Larry" as we used to call him for his lack of hygiene has taken over my life and my body thanks to the failed experiment of a group of Nerds in the science fair of our university. Our entire fraternity was required to attend the college science fair it's not like any of us had submitted any projects but it was required plus there were a couple of cute girls on some kind of project that involved them being naked and we really had to see that.
After satisfying our curiosity by watching Whatever College Girls Have Tried To Do we decided to walk around to see if anything was interesting before heading home to party. Unfortunately, stupid Larry was struck by a science project with bright lights and some lightning bolts. The experiment was supposed to allow two people to talk telepathically while touching the glowing object.
Well, apparently the experiment failed. Or so I think maybe it was payback for all the pranks we played on the nerd fraternity, especially stupid Larry whose hobby was Finding "fun" ways to torment those skinny smart guys.
Larry thought it would be fun to try the experiment. And pretending it hadn't worked, which was pretty silly, wasn't one of Larry's best jokes. I knew that would get them in trouble but I decided to go along with Larry. We volunteered as test subjects for the demo and we both touched the object, it was amazing that the machine worked although it was kind of weird hearing Larry's thoughts in my head. Larry started pretending like nothing was happening and said to the nerdy kids "dude you have to change the batteries on this piece of shit because I think it's broken"
Everyone in front of the experiment started laughing And that didn't make the nerds very happy Especially because the science fair Jury was Just evaluating their project at this point well it seems like they paid attention to Larry because when they increased the intensity of the machine he could now see through Larry's eyes. From one moment to another the machine overloaded and caused the fuse to blow in the entire university And the whole room lost power.
However I and Larry were stuck in each other's bodies, at first, it was very strange to see my body in something other than a mirror move on its own, it was even more strange to have to pretend to be the stupid of the air while all this was resolved. His body is nothing more than a trash can filled with gallons of beer and double cheese pizzas.
Damn, I can barely stand the awful stench that comes from my fat sweaty armpits to also have to stand the strong smell of larry's lack of showers now that it's fucking my body up, and I've bought every deodorant they sell at Walmart trying to hide the smell that comes from larry's body but it is impossible the bad smell is still here!
And while I have to be the stinky party animal Larry he doesn't seem to give a shit about my life and my reputation, if I don't get back in my body soon Larry will also make my body fit into a dump like the one I have now, it's impossible don't get frustrated when I hear they're going to take away my stinker moniker to give it to larry who's in my body now, I think I should pay the nerds a quick visit to make sure they finish fixing their stupid machine before larry ruins my life
my patreon subscribers were able to read this story last year, if you want to read more of my bodyswap stories you can check out my patreon page to read more of my 100 exclusive posts and read them before everyone here on tumblr.
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15 people, 15 questions
Tagged by @my-rose-tinted-glasses, @infinitelyprecious and @he-is-lightning-in-a-bottle! Thank you friends 💕
1. are you named after anyone?
Nope! My folks just liked the name they chose for me. They did the thing where they tried to choose a name that they thought would be unique and ended up with one of the most common names in the year, for both me and my brother.
2. when was the last time you cried?
Watching the What Did You Eat Yesterday S2 finale.
3. do you have kids?
Nope! Never wanted any, so I'm happy with the status quo.
4. what sports do you play/have you played?
HA. Here we go. In elementary school I was on a neighbourhood softball team and was terrible; in the end of year tournament, we were two outs and I was at bat and struck out for us to lose, which soured me on this game permanently. I also took neighbourhood tennis lessons and sucked at that too though I really did try. In middle school I was on the basketball team because I was tall and the coach was convinced I could learn hand/eye coordination....she was wrong. I am a decent defense player because height lets me block but I cannot land a foul shot to save my life (or my team's). For fun during lunch l I played [American] football with other enthusiasts. We would play tackle in all weather and on pavement, and we had a great time (I wasn't good but I enjoyed it). By high school I had finally convinced everyone around me I have no hand/eye coordination or physical skill and stopped all sports activities. PHEW. These days I do no sports though I will go to my company slo-pitch games and heckle like heckling's a sport.
5. do you use sarcasm?
Absolutely, but I try not to use it in that mean way in which people try to make someone feel bad about themselves.
6. what’s the first thing you notice about people?
Body language, how they hold themselves and move.
7. what’s your eye color?
Close to slate grey/blue.
8. scary movies or happy endings?
I don't respect this false dichotomy.
9. any talents?
My superpower is the ability to sing along to any song whether or not I've heard it before, and whether or not I know the language. Other than that, I'm pretty good at understanding what people are trying to say and not just what they actually said, which comes in handy in show analysis as well as interpersonal communication and work. And I am good at modifying/adapting recipes to use what I've got/what I like on the fly. Those are my core talents!
10. where were you born?
Toronto, Canada
11. what are your hobbies?
Other than watching All The BL/GL/QL? I am crafty, I like playing with mixed media stuff, lap weaving, and bookmaking/bookbinding. I haven't had the energy for it the last few years, and that's been mildly devastating. But I made holiday cards for the first time in years this year, which was very fun! I also have been known to puzzle, and I garden when I can. And I hike on occasion!
12. do you have any pets?
Nope! I'm allergic to most pets (fur and feathers; I tried keeping fish but was allergic to the algae on the tank, so I gave up). The dog in my avatar is my parents' rescue dog they got after I left home, and I see her when I visit them! She's a "hypoallergenic" breed mix but that's actually meaningless and I'm still allergic lol
13. how tall are you?
180cm; and the kicker is I've been this tall since elementary school so I went from being the tallest person in the room by a LOT to half the boys in the room shooting up to my height or higher, which was a weird experience!
14. favorite subject in school?
Tie between English, Biology, and Chemistry. I loved science and words and analysis in both subjects. I ran the bio and chem clubs in high school!
15. dream job?
University textbook editor, which I did for ~7 years! And it was everything I wanted it to be, but I eventually outgrew it. I love what I do now too (essentially I'm in management), and I know I'm lucky that I've had jobs I love for most of my working life.
I won't tag anyone because I've been absent for days, but if you see this, this is permission to do this tag game, and tag me so I see your post 💕
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Uncanny X-Men: The Heroic Age
You've probably seen these panels before, out of context, but in context, it's just . . . heartbreaking, honestly. People often say, oh, Hank got so gloomy and unhappy in the 00s, what happened? I used to like him more when he was happy and upbeat, why'd they ruin his character?
But 00s X-Men comics are not like 90s X-Men comics. 00s X-Men comics are sad, and depressing, and brutal, and gloomy, and they are generally not all that fun to read. It's genocide after Decimation after school bus bombing after death squad after betrayal after death. Why is Hank sad and unhappy? Because it's literally impossible for him to be happy, he's constantly stuck in a medical bay stitching up his friends so they can go right back out and fight another battle they won't come back from.
Despite what you may have heard, Hank used to have one of the most unbreakable, loving, kind, and compassionate souls in the universe. And then said universe decided to just start taking lumps out of him. He's been tortured, science has failed him, the government tried to kill his people, his students have died, his friends are turning into grim faced soldiers, and I think this exchange makes it clear that Nightcrawler's recent death affected him more than anyone realised. More than Hank realised.
Right in the middle of his dive to the depths of what his morality will bear, Hank has this moment with Kurt, and it couldn't be framed as more of a call to come home and be free of his obligations - the window is open, the sunlight is calling, Kurt wants him to come home and be with his family . . . but Hank has to keep trying. Because he can't bear to turn around and tell everyone that he has no answer to the Decimation until he really has tried everything. He can't bear to disappoint them like that. But at least the possibility was there.
And then Kurt died. Chasing a dream. Protecting the mutant messiah. Hank was raised Episcopalian Christian, but even in the 90s, his faith was stated not to be particularly strong, and in the wake of Genosha, in the way of everything pre-M-Day, it's very easy to believe that he just lost all faith, he put his stock into science, and then that failed him, too. What has he got left? Kurt isn't there to argue with him and try and pull him out of his doldrums, to be the light calling him away from the promise of just one more experiment.
Kurt died defending a dream. Hank tried believing, and now, now he only has nightmares left. Memories of what he did upholding those beliefs.
I don't blame Molly for the way she reacts here. She's just a kid, she has no way of knowing what Hank's gone through, the weight on his shoulders, the helplessness and the hopelessness that he's feeling. The ebb of his drive to keep going. But by the same token, Hank isn't a depressing jerk, Hank is just . . . depressed. He's bipolar at the best of times, and this? This is the mother of all downswings.
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whenever a friend comes over my bird only wants to hang out with them and doesn’t wanna be with me & it always makes me feel bad. cause i used to be my bird’s favorite person and he’d only ever want to be with me but lately he likes my friends more when they’re here. i don’t know if maybe it’s just cause they’re new and he gets excited or maybe cause it’s mating season and his hormones are making him confused but weirdly it hurts my feelings
I get that and those feelings are totally valid
If it’s any consolation from the science side of things this can usually occur just because the people are novel experiences. They’re new, they don’t see them as often, it’s exciting. Kind of like how of you eat pizza every day for a month you get sick of pizza but if you get pizza one time a year pizza tastes absolutely incredible. You could be the best pizza on the planet and it still won’t matter if you just finished having 1000 of it. That boring salad will look better than the pizza even though it doesn’t actually taste as good.
If possible I would try to look at these events like taking your kid to the theme park. Your friends coming over is an exciting fun enrichment activity, let them enjoy the rides(friends) and take the sidelines for a bit just watching them have fun. At the end of the day they’d still want to come home and relax with you.
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hi morgan! i hope you're well. i've got a Lot of asks for the end-of-year ask game, but hey, it's the end of the year, we may as well go out with a bang! how about 1, 3, 9, 10, 15, 16 (I know you like to match your songs to your wips), 18, 19, 20, 21 and 30? <3
honey! thank you for this! i've answered 10 and 19 here for spook, but let's tackle the rest of them! i can't really do short answers, so this is going to be monstrous.
1: this year i've definitely tried to write things that are a tiny bit more adult! i still won't do explicit sex scenes, but i've definitely pushed my boundaries in songs from within birdcages, lichtenberg, and the minchan vampire au, and it's been pretty fun to push myself out of my comfort zone with that and figure out how to incorporate those scenes into a story.
3: i think i've learned that i genuinely enjoy writing things closer to horror! with lichtenberg, the vampire au, and my nanowrimo original project (currently on hiatus while i recover from the health issues and nano burnout) i've had the opportunity to write things that are kind of weird and awful and uncanny, and i've found that i absolutely love doing it. here's to getting spookier in 2024!
9: the red thread au has meant so much to me to write; as a queer person, and someone autistic, and someone who frequently experiences the very weird sensation of not being quite as real as everyone around me, it's been a joy to write the story of seungmin slowly being drawn into humanity and all its joys by his soulmate. it's gentle and soft and i've loved exploring things like new sensory experiences and seungmin learning to understand his perception of his gender and sexuality and the idea of feeling like he belongs. it'll be a while before it's finished to a degree i think is satisfactory, but i'm excited to share it eventually.
15: i only posted two fics this year, so i'll rec the one i'm not currently posting! songs from within birdcages is a science fiction adventure romance between a freighter pilot and the high-end prostitute he falls in love with and plans to set free; it's a story of hope, and home, and love enduring despite darkness, and a determined belief in fairytales; it gets dark at times, but there's always a light at the end. i'm genuinely very proud of it, and i'm planning a sort of spin-off next year covering my favourite side ship and how a romance could develop between a man and a machine who's only just learning how to feel.
16: writing songs!!!! hell yes!!! you know i love a writing song!!!! i'll include five, one for each fic i've worked on this year.
songs from within birdcages: constellations, jade lemac
lichtenberg: let this remain, alana henderson
the beekeeper au: true as true can get, kaiyko
the red thread au: you're so fucking pretty, the regrettes
the vampire au: iodine and iron, the veils
18: the red thread au still has no title. i'm 41k into it and i just have no ideas at all! i'm waiting for inspiration to strike as i work on it.
20: my favourite ending line of the year is definitely the last line of songs from within birdcages:
The lights of the Rinan Cluster fade away behind them, electric lilac and artificial green; and by the time Chan and Hyunjin remember to try to watch them go - to witness their past blur into nothing but pinpricks in the far distance, indistinguishable from the stars - they’ve disappeared entirely.
it's a good end to hyunjin and chan's journey, i think, to be so absorbed in one another that they forget to watch the old life that hurt them so badly fade away. they deserve that.
21: my favourite piece of dialogue is this little snippet from the beekeeper au; i think it just really shows off chan's warmth and his enthusiasm for his bees!
“You don’t have to get right up close,” he tells Jisung. “But it’s worth it if you feel comfortable with it. They’re beautiful little creatures, and amazing builders.” He smiles, looking almost giddy with joy. “Every time I look in the hives I fall in love with them a bit, you know? Seeing what they can do.”
“I don’t really know a lot about bees,” Jisung admits, and Chan shakes his head animatedly.
“That’s ok! I can tell you a few things. Just, uh- let me know if I go on about it too much, yeah? I tend to get carried away.”
30: i have so much i want to write in 2024 on top of finishing current projects! i'd love to finally sit down and write the minchan hanahaki au (hanahaki is next after vampires on the list of 'tropes i've been desperate to write but only once i think i have something unique to bring to it'), as well as the 2min songs from within birdcages spinoff. i think i'd also love to write something for another fandom; i have a small store of wangxian ideas i'd love to write, but i keep getting drawn back into skz.
thank you so much for these asks! i'm sorry my answers were so very long! <3
#asks#oh-my-chocolate#i want to sit and write more weird gothic spookiness so badly i love it#maybe next year i'll do something with the drowned house vibe i had a while back#probably not#stray kids fic#ao3 author
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