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slashersteve · 2 years

Text

Let's Kiss

pairing: Steve Harrington/Female Reader

summary: It might be the end of the world, and you're for some reason worried about having never been kissed. Steve decides to change that.

warnings/extra tags: friends kissing tm, friends making out tm, reader spirals for a second here, gets a little heated but this isnt my nsfw blog, cursing, beta read, edited by me and autocorrect babey

note: forgive me for writing slowly :') i wanted to experiment with writing more kissing scenes and decided it was a perfect time for you to kiss steve till you were stupid. Thanks for reading and enjoy <3

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For the third time in your life, it felt like the end of the world, but unlike those times, this time felt as if it actually might be. And you were…not okay if you were being honest. Everyone who was piled into this stolen Winnebago that Eddie Munson hot-wired was not okay, but they seemed to be holding it together better than you.

When Steve Harrington drove into an open field so that you guys could properly prepare for your battle with Vecna, who was also known as Henry Creel, but also 001, you thought the fresh air would be just what you needed. You were wrong though when you thought of Vecna though, as the guy had shown Nancy some big, big plans of his that had to do with opening up a massive gate in the middle of Hawkins.

In response, you and everyone else here had big plans too, some that involved baiting him with a still cursed Max while the rest of you venture into the Upside Down to try and kill him before his plan could come to fruition. Honestly, it was a good plan, especially with Nancy basically leading all of you, and you couldn’t poke many holes into it…except for one…or some.

What if he didn’t take the bait with Max? What if Dustin and Eddie’s plan to distract the bats didn’t work? What if you step on a vine and alert the guy? And what if he literally knows everything you’re planning at this exact second and you’re all walking into a trap?

You don’t usually freak out like this, in fact, you had once prided yourself in your ability to be calm and collected in nearly every situation, but there must be something in the air right now or Vecna/Henry/One somehow got into your head or something because you were on the verge of a whole panic attack. Even Robin was more calm than you were (or at least appeared so).

“Preparation is key,” Nancy had said when going over your plan again when you questioned if it would actually work. And she was right, the first time you were in the Upside Down it was by chance (or force as the bruises around Steve’s neck still gave you uncomfortable chills and dread), but this time you’re going to be practically armed with all the shit you just bought at that angry hick store Eddie suggested while Max baits Vecna.

God, the thought of anything going wrong made your chest hurt, and you wanted to vomit all over the grass next to Nancy and Max’s feet as she sawed off the barrel of the shotgun.

“I’m- I’m going to go and change,” you said quickly before that could happen. They both glanced at you, and Nancy told you that was fine all the while it looked like Max could see right through you.

“She looks like she’s about to bail or something,” Max said, watching you make a beeline toward the Winnebago where Steve and Robin were currently sitting outside of.

Nancy hummed as she returned her focus on the felony she was committing and said, “I’m sure she’s fine.”

You didn’t say so much as a word when you went into the Winnebago and closed it, making Steve and Robin glance at one another before Robin was continuing to make their Molotov bombs with kerosene and empty alcohol bottles.

Steve’s eyes lingered on the shut door a little longer, noticing your odd demeanor, before reluctantly turning his attention back to the Molotov bombs as well.

It was in the Winnebago when things took a turn for the worse for you.

You had just finished changing out of your tattered clothing from your first trip in the Upside Down, and now wore the exact same camouflage shirt Steve was wearing and some new pants. You started to spiral, essentially, your thoughts coming at you fast and all at once, thoughts about what could potentially happen and go wrong, about possibly getting killed, which led you to think about a lot of the things you hadn’t done yet.

You wanted to graduate and attend the college you were already accepted to, then graduate from there, and maybe find a significant other there or something to at least experience that. It was just insane to you that you experienced what it’s like to breathe in the air of another dimension before anything inherently romantic.

It made you wonder if your life would ever be…just normal.

That was when the door was being opened and Steve was walking in without any regard to look specifically for you. When his eyes landed on you, they suddenly squeezed shut and he said, “Shit! Sorry! Were you changing? I’ll just-“ he blindly stepped backwards, knocking into the back of the passenger seat.

"It's okay! I'm done anyways," you told him, and he opened only one eye slowly before opening both.

"Still, I should've knocked," he laughed awkwardly as he stepped back into the Winnebago and said, "Molotov's are done, Eddie and Dustin's spears and shields are made, Nancy committed a felony...I say we're almost ready."

"Oh," you said a bit shakily, "So soon?"

He nodded, and said, "Yup, we should probably leave soon if we want to make it at sundown."

You dropped your eyes for a second, and forced the nervous exhale from coming out as everyone was on as much edge as you were about everything, and you didn't need to burden any of them with your doubt.

"Are...you ready?" Steve asked suddenly, and you glanced up at him.

"I-" you shut your lips to gulp nervously, then opened them again to say, "I...don't know..."

His eyes looked thoughtful as they stared at you, and he nodded, "Yeah...me either to be honest." He laughed weakly as he leaned on the side and crossed his arms.

You looked up and kept your gaze on him this time as he sighed deeply, "Just talked with Robin, and she thinks it might not work out for us..."

Your heart dropped, "Oh."

"But...she also said that we're crazy, and that...if we don't try and stop him then who will," he licked his dry lips for a second, "And she's right. Whatever happens...we win..or lose...at least we tried."

It was a bitter thought, to think that even if you go in prepared and ready for battle things can still go south. You needed to sit down immediately, and once you did on the couch in the back, you dropped your head in your hands at the thought of the endless possibilities.

"Is this what our lives have been leading up to?" you asked suddenly, voice quivering, "Battling a sadistic clock obsessed guy with powers like El and bad skin who snaps people's bones because he wants to open a giant gate to take over the world? What ever happened to normal lives, you know? Why hasn't our only problems been oh am I going to pass this physics exam or oh my god is he going to call me back? You know normal problems that normal people experience?"

You were rambling in a similar manner like Robin might, and it caught Steve off guard as you hardly ever did anything like that while Robin does it often.

Also, you already looked and sounded like you were defeated before the final battle even began, and Steve disliked that a lot.

"Hey, hey, we beat this guy? Then we'll have those normal problems," Steve tried to comfort you, "If this guy is really the big threat, and we manage to put him down, that'll be the end of everything...hopefully."

You moaned dreadfully, completely ignoring Steve, "There's just so much I should be experiencing, I don't understand why I experienced what it's like to climb up into a ceiling and fall out of the other side before I experience, I don't know, a first date? A first kiss? I know that stuff's not super important but still, it would be nice."

Steve tried to speak, but you were continuing on, your thoughts venturing to other matters besides yourself and it was making him even more concerned with your current state.

"And it's not even just me, like those kids out there? They're so young, one of them is literally cursed, like what the hell is up with that? It’s so fucked up!"

You were continuing to ramble and asking rhetorical question after rhetorical question that Steve had to actually go over to sit next to you and grasp your shoulders to make you stop and look at him.

"Hey!" he said, slightly shaking you as your eyes met, "All this is not helping anybody, especially yourself. I think the same things sometimes, and I wish I had some kind of explanation for you, but I don't even know it."

You stared blankly at him, and he sucked in a tight breath and continued to say, "What I do know is that we really don't have normal lives, and you know, at this point we just kind of have to to live with that-"

"But-"

"I also know," he cut you off, "That if we're going to go down there and try to put an end to this then we need to be prepared and level-headed you know? So...just...tell me what I can do to make you feel better."

His final request was odd to you, as you didn't know what he could do. He could tell you everything was going to be alright, but you'd know it was probably going to be a lie to try and calm you down. Steve knew as much as you did, and it sucked for a moment because you were expecting him to know more. Still, the question did make your heart swell up because of how genuinely nice he was, just being here with you and talking to you, wanting to make you feel better.

You instead took in a deep breath, trying to calm down the pacing of your heart stemmed from your blast of anxiety, and now the typical feeling you get when around the guy as you said, "You...you don't have to do anything. I'm sorry...you're right, tonight could be the end of the world, we're all nervous, but I'm the only stupid one ranting about never having kissed anyone."

You rolled your eyes at your own stupidity, and turned away from Steve to look at the ground.

Beside you, Steve shifted in his spot, and said "You don't have to apologize...I just almost lost you there for a moment."

You laughed weakly, but didn't reply.

Steve looked at you thoughtfully, and cleared his throat gently before saying, "For the record...I don't think you being worried about things like a first kiss is stupid."

"Yes it is Steve," you replied immediately, "In the face of the end of the world? Yeah...it's stupid."

"Well, I don't know, they're probably thinking about things like that too..." Steve trailed off, "Just because you're the only one voicing it doesn't make it stupid."

You pressed your lips together, and shrugged weakly at him in response as you leaned back on the couch now, the top of your head smacking lightly against the back window.

You weren't looking at Steve, because if you were, you probably would've caught a shift in his gaze that meant an idea was coming about, whether it was good or bad, you wouldn't have known until he said it.

And after a few seconds of silence, he did tell you, except you refused to believe you heard him right.

"What?" you asked, wanting him to repeat it so you don’t look silly.

He coughed into his hand nervously and said, "I could kiss you right now...you know...give you a sense of...normal or something...or to like…cross that off your list."

Steve wasn't looking at you as he repeated himself, which was just as well, because you felt your cheeks heat up and your jaw slightly drop. Not sure if he was just teasing you or something, you muttered, "Normal...normal friends don't kiss each other, Steve."

He laughed breathlessly, and ran his hand over his mouth for a moment before replying, "Friends do help each other though...also pretty sure we established we're not normal."

Now that made you laugh, not a weak or breathless one like before, but a genuine one and you said, "Yeah...that's definitely true.”

He was looking at you now, brown eyes staring right into yours and you saw then that he was serious about it, serious about kissing you and letting you experience at least that before tonight.

It wasn't like you hadn't thought about it before, if that warm feeling he always gave you when he was around, even now, said anything. You've thought about it even before you were friends, when he was a stupid jerk in high school who never looked twice at you but still made you weak in the knees.

After getting to know him more, you wanted to do more than just kiss the guy. You wanted to go on dates with him, hold his hand, make him laugh...all those romantic like things you've only seen in the movies. Would kissing him right now, in a moment like this, be a good move?

At your silence, Steve began to move to stand as he was saying, "God yeah, you're right it's not normal. I'm sorry I offered and made it weird."

Your hand was flying upward to capture his wrist gently, and when your eyes met, your thoughts went away as you realized you had made your answer already. You gave him a single nod, and then said, "Let's kiss."

His gaze remained on yours then, his expression softening slightly as he waited a few seconds before settling back down in the space next to you.

The atmosphere changed drastically then, the color within the Winnebago a pretty golden shade, bouncing off of Steve's face and his brown eyes as they bore into yours. You never really noticed how soft of a brown color his eyes were, maybe because you’ve never been this close enough to see them.

His next question had tore you out of your mesmerized gaze, asking you in a soft, quiet voice you never heard him speak in if you were sure it’s what you wanted.

You nodded, and said in a breathless voice, "Yes I'm sure."

Your heart was beating out of your chest, this time for the reason that any second now you were going to be kissing Steve Harrington, the once King of Hawkins High, and now one of your closest friends. You were nervous, and you were scared, but no more than you were scared about what might happen tonight.

He was just so close to you though, instead of the usual cologne he wore that drove you mad, he smelled like the earth and the pungent smell of the kerosene they used to create molotovs. It really proved that it wasn't just his cologne that drove you mad, it was simply him.

It was him just being here and this close that’s what made you this way, what was making you forget for a second that the end of the world was hours away. Your breath had even hitched and he gently reached upward to cup your cheek, a gesture that made you feel more heat spread across your face and chest.

His eyes flickered to your lips then as he began to move in, and you tensed up as you felt his lips gently graze over your own before they pressed fully against yours.

Though it was just a peck, just two lips touching, you practically melted in your seat when you felt his slightly chapped lips on yours. Your eyes even fluttered shut for a second, and any doubt of this being a bad idea faded at once as you returned the kiss.

When he leaned away from you after a few seconds, you opened your eyes to meet him and he asked with a small smile on the lips that were just on yours, "How was that?"

You were practically breathless as you replied something incoherent, and Steve tilted his head curiously at you, not understanding what you had said, and to be fair you didn’t know either. Your eyes fell back onto his lips, instead wondering if they were tingling like yours currently were, and wondering if he too felt the fire that he ignited in your chest by that simple kiss.

Steve had noticed your eyes had flickered back to his lips, and he exhaled deeply, and moved his hand underneath your chin to make you meet his gaze again. You blinked almost dreamily up at him, and he asked you in that same sweet, soft voice that would be added to your favorite things about him… "Want to do it again?"

Oh, how fast you said yes.

He didn't hesitate after your answer, pressing his lips fully onto yours to quite frankly give you another best first kiss of your life that you were sure nobody could beat even if they tried.

His experienced lips moved against your inexperienced ones, taking control and taking your breath away all at once. His lips were slow and steady on yours, gently sliding along yours and it was you who tilted your head gently in order to deepen it just a little more.

Steve's hand had moved from your chin, rather moving to the back of your head as he exhaled for a moment right onto your lips, and he asked, “Is this okay?” in reference to how quickly heated this kiss was becoming. You responded to him by leaning back in, and he chuckled as you recaptured his lips onto yours.

You didn't know what you were doing, since you've made it clear you've never kissed anyone, let alone like this, but it felt like you were doing something right as you tried to return his kiss with the same intensity as him especially when he hummed against you, his lips slightly vibrating on yours and pulled you impossibly closer to him.

When you felt the swipe of his tongue on your bottom lip, it sort of brought you back to yourself for a moment and he was leaning away again, his cheeks were a blush pink color and he said, “Fuck I’m sorry. We agreed on a kiss, and I’m trying to stick my tongue down your throat.”

He laughed awkwardly at his own words, and you could only sit there and stare at him all starry eyed, your prior concerns with the end of the world all but gone for even just a few seconds and you replied, “I…I don’t mind.”

Now you felt like the awkward one when he just stared at you, except you didn’t notice that his eyes were just as starry as yours, and then, the soft brown of his eyes shifted and darkened at your response and you were kissing again, picking off right where you left off.

Your lips parted and you felt him slip his tongue inside of your mouth, now really drinking you up and your hands flew upward to his sides, sliding them underneath his jacket and you felt him shudder against your hands as they touched his firm back above his shirt that matched yours.

The honest truth was you weren’t thinking about what this may imply, with how good Steve was kissing you and how intoxicated you both were quickly becoming on each other. It didn’t occur to you that Steve has probably been wanting to kiss you like this for a while now.

With your arms around him, you pulled him almost on top of you, your head smacking back against the window again as his tongue explored your mouth and all your worries just floated away as your mind was becoming fuzzy on him and the feeling he was bringing out of you.

“Steve,” you mumbled his name with a voice that was even unrecognizable to you, and it only urged him further, drinking up the next murmur of his name and you dragged your nails into his back (being wearing of his bandage) now feeling a sort of heat settling in the pit of your stomach as he practically devoured you in this Winnebago.

There was no telling where this might’ve gone, or how far either of you would’ve let it go, as Eddie was entering the Winnebago with a slam of the door saying, “Hey! So we’re- holy shit-”

The rest of his sentence was cut off at the sight of the position you and Steve were currently in. He had come in so fast and unexpectedly that neither you or Steve pulled apart quick enough so Eddie saw, well, everything, especially Steve nearly on top of you and his tongue in your mouth.

All you really could do was pull your lips apart from each other and look at the metalhead with similar, wide eyes.

“Uh…yes?” you asked awkwardly after a few seconds of silence, feeling your cheeks heat up with embarrassment rather than whatever Steve had been making you feel.

Eddie stared at the both of you for a second longer before he cleared his throat and said, “Yeah, some of us need this to change in, so if you want to make out- there’s an entire field out there,” he gestured around almost dramatically, and you blinked a few times, “Right yeah, so I’ll give you guys a moment.”

Neither you and Steve could properly respond to him as he was out of the vehicle in record time and you could hear some mumbling after the door shut and then Dustin saying quite loudly, “What? No, they’re not together- wait- what?”

A harsher wave of embarrassment came over you this time, realizing what had just happened between you and Steve, how heated it had gotten from a single peck to Steve’s tongue in your mouth and you pulling him on top of you. Your eyes trailed back to meet Steve as he leaned away from you, and your hands were falling to your lap. You wanted to say something, anything, but all that came out was a flustered breath at the loss of warmth you felt underneath his jacket.

Thankfully, Steve spoke for you, and he asked after an awkward, light cough, “Are you uh- feeling better now?”

You sat up more, flashing your eyes toward him before you looked down at your lap, noticing you were twiddling your thumbs nervously and all you could do was nod. Steve’s eyes stayed resting on yours, and before you knew it, he put his hand over yours.

Your eyes lifted to meet him again, and you could see there was a small, almost shy smile on his lips before he said, “I think I want to take you out on your first date too, if we end up saving the world.”

Your heart skipped a beat at that, and asked stupidly, “As like…a friend thing?”

He chuckled at your response, and shook his head, “No…no not like a friend thing at all…to be honest what just happened…if it wasn’t clear that wasn’t a friend thing either, I’ve been wanting to do that forever.”

His cheeks were still flushed, and his voice was still soft and low, only wanting you to hear him. And the way he was looking at you? His eyes were so intense, so adoring. Has he always looked at you like this and you just never noticed?

You stayed staring at him with a soft, surprised gaze, genuinely taken back by all this, and you decided right then and there that you were going to kill Vecna/Henry/One just to go on this date with Steve and maybe kiss him like you just had until you couldn’t breathe anymore and without interruption.

#my titles are the worst i am SO sorry i can never match just hold me </3 #this might be one of the final imagines as i wanna focus on cant cheat fate #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington #stranger things #stranger things imagine #stranger things fanfic #reader insert #female reader #lys writes again

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plant-flwrs · 3 years

Note

Hiii, i love your writing. I was wondering if you could do a remus lupin imagine. Were its mutual pinnin but they dont know the other like them. And sirus gets tired of it and takes pollyjuice to look like remus and get you to confess🥺

under the mistletoe // remus lupin

masterlist!

a/n: oh my god i’ve been non-stop reading atyd and it is my new obsession. it’s completely canon to me now. ty for ur request! i used they/them pronouns because you didn’t specify, so i hope that’s alright <3 oh! also! im gonna try this new thing w my fics to see if they flow better that way; instead of just jumping in time i’ll put a little indicator (-). wanted to try it out, dunno if i’ll keep using it. i’m so excited for christmas and this put me in an even more christmasy mood omg

summary: Staying at Hogwarts for the holidays seemed like the best way to avoid distractions, but with the Marauders there, distractions were guaranteed. Especially when your crush on Remus proves to be incredibly distracting.

cw: underage drinking (hangover vomiting), swearing (harmless, classic Sirius things)

(8k) (haven’t written this much in so long wow i forgot i could)

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The Gryffindor common room was your most favorite place in Hogwarts. It was warm and comforting, and you had some of your best memories there. With just a glance around the room you could feel your entire school career in just one room.

Though, now that you were in your sixth year, it wasn’t the leisurely place it used to be.

All around you, books touched any bare surface there was. N.E.W.T.’s were sooner than you’d like, sooner than anyone liked, and you were filled with anxiety. You knew your strenuous studying was a bit soon, but you felt like you had the weight of the world on your shoulders.

You felt so stressed, in fact, that not even Lily Evans could convince you to go home for the holidays that Christmas.

“Exams are months away, Y/n!” she sighed as you fell down onto the couch beside her, narrowly returning before curfew from the library, “You ought to enjoy Christmas.”

“I will enjoy it. Here,” you said, rolling your head back and closing your eyes.

You felt sore, as if you had run a marathon, but you had been locked away in the library all day.

Part of you, the smallest part, blamed Remus Lupin for this newfound obsession. Your fellow Gryffindor, the most studious boy in your year, was the initial reason for your new studying habits. You had started going to the library in an attempt to steal glances at him, an innocent crush that you most definitely let overcome you.

Remus had always gone to the library, you knew that, but ever since your O.W.L.’s he seemed to take extra pride in his work. You couldn’t blame him for secluding himself in the library, for that was the only place on campus that it seemed his rowdy friends did not go.

“You can’t enjoy Christmas alone,” Lily tutted, pulling the massive textbook off your lap and putting it on the table in front of you.

“You’re staying for the holidays, too?”

Sirius had just bounded down the stairs from the boys dormitories, his usual mischievous smirk on his face.

“Yes, they are,” Lily answered for you, turning to look at Sirius as he hovered behind you near the stairs.

“Well, that’s lucky,” he said, acting as if he had a secret he took pride in no one else knowing.

“Why is that, Sirius?” Lily sighed, becoming annoyed.

“Remus, James, Peter, and I are staying, too,” he said, smirk turning into a boyish smile.

“You are?” you opened your eyes and turned to face him, finally.

He met your gaze and nodded excitedly, seeming to already have the Christmas spirit in him.

“So you won’t be alone!” Lily said excitedly, then turned towards Sirius with a more dull tone, “Not the best company, but at least not alone.”

Sirius scoffed in mock offence, scrunching his face up with imaginary tears as he stomped back up the stairs.

“God, that lot is so bizarre,” she groaned, turning back to you on the couch to see you dozing off.

(-)

Snow fell on the grounds of Hogwarts, and you gazed at it from a fogged up window in the library.

Lily had gone, Mary had gone, Marlene had gone, just about everyone had gone. You had never stayed at Hogwarts for the holidays before, and you knew not many people did, but you expected more than there were.

No Slytherins had stayed, which was a welcomed absence from those who did. You knew the two Hufflepuffs that remained, but only because you had classes with them in your fourth year. The Ravenclaws that stayed, there couldn’t have been more than five of them, were often holed up the in the library with you. There were the most Gryffindors, five, including you and the marauders.

You were almost surprised that James had gone through with staying; Remus had mentioned wonderful things about the Potters and the Christmases they hosted. Still, he was here, cheerful as ever.

As your eyes blurred with tiredness and the window became nearly too fogged to see through, you sighed in frustration.

You missed your family, you missed home, and you really regretted staying at school. You decided to give yourself the day off from studying. With a glance down at your watch, you saw it was nearly lunch time anyways. You had slept in and missed breakfast, coming straight to the library, and your stomach felt empty.

You made your way to the common room, wanting to drop off the heavy books you had accumulated. Mumbling the password to the portrait, you stumbled through without noticing the rowdy conversation coming towards you.

You ran right into James’ chest, stumbling back and already mumbling an apology.

“Y/n?” he asked happily, as if he had been looking for you.

“Hey, guys,” you sighed, forcing a polite smile when all you really wanted to do was collapse on the couch and sleep for days.

“Sirius told us you were staying, but I’d thought you’d changed your mind. Haven’t seen you since the holiday started!” James’s booming and joyful voice made you want to cringe away, but you couldn’t manage anything less than a small smile at his kindness.

“I’ve been in the library,” you explained, chuckling at the horrified look on three of the four faces.

“You’re worse than I’d thought,” Sirius started, cut off by a sharp elbow to the ribcage by Remus, which only seemed to encourage him.

“We can’t have that,” James finished for him, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

“Oi,” Remus started, casting a sympathetic smile at you as he tried to stop his friends from potentially insulting you.

“Why don’t you come have lunch with us?” Peter squeaked from behind James as he glanced at the two dark-headed boys for some sort of approval, “We were just on our way down.”

“What a great idea, Wormtail!” Sirius boomed, earning himself another elbow to the side from Remus.

You glanced nervously at the boys in front of you, trying to discern if they were setting you up for a joke or teasing you.

“You don’t have to-” Remus blurted out, his cheeks pink, “-I mean, if you’re busy with your studies. I know how hard your working-”

“Nonsense, Moony!” James smiled, levitating your bag off your shoulder and easily landing it on the floor somewhere behind him, “they have to eat!”

You chuckled, ducking your head down as James slung his arm around your shoulder and escorted you back through the portrait hole.

You felt lighter immediately. Whether it was the absence of your heavy bag, or the way the boys’ easy conversation and laughter felt so inviting and warm, you did not know.

The self-pity you had been feeling only a moment ago seemed to go, too. James kept his brotherly arm around your shoulder all the way to the Great Hall, where he split his path and sat across from you. Sirius followed you down the isle, continuing his teasing conversation with Peter. James sat between Remus and Peter, his smile never faltering. He acted as if eating lunch with his mates and their tag-along was the best thing he had ever done.

Remus was quiet, almost shy, but you knew that. You had known him your entire time at Hogwarts, and the crush you had on him seemed to last that whole time. You had seen him come out of his shell as the years went on, but he didn’t seem nearly as comfortable as when he was with his friends.

You stifled your laughter with the back of your hand, blushing slightly at Sirius’s rude joke as he bumped his shoulder into yours. You looked down at your plate, pushing around the mashed potatoes that had grown cold.

“Sirius!” Peter yelped, his eyes wide in shock as he nervously glanced to you.

Sirius had made a crude joke, you knew that, but you hadn’t heard it. You and Remus had been meeting in short bursts of eye contact and the small action alone was making your spine shiver.

You looked up from your potatoes, seeing the boys fading with laughter and delve back into their food. That was something you never understood about boys; they sat down, ate and ate until they were done, and then got to talking. You, Lily, Marlene, and Mary could talk for hours while you ate, but the boys seemed unable to do more than one thing at once.

The thought brought a fond smile to your face, and you felt something bump against your shin. Looking up from your plate, you met Remus’s eyes again.

“What’s got you smiling?” he asked, his voice kind with a teasing nature behind it.

James looked up from his plate in the middle of shoving what had to be an entire chicken breast in his mouth, and began cooing at you as your cheeks flushed.

“’M just happy you lot stayed,” you blushed, refusing to meet Remus’s eyes, “would have been dreadful without your company.”

Sirius, without missing a beat, threw his arm around your shoulders and drew you into his chest. His large hand went to your head, ruffling up your hair. You cringed away, giggling and attempting to lay your hair smooth.

Everyone’s cheers in agreeance died down, and James roped Sirius into a heated discussion about Quidditch as Peter hung onto his every word.

“‘M happy you stayed, too,” Remus mumbled from across the table, his head ducked down as a blush was creeping up the back of his neck.

You fought the urge to break the eye contact, giving him a smile so wide that your cheeks burned.

You all returned to the common room with full stomachs and wide smiles, courtesy of James, who had just announced his newest plan at getting Lily’s attention. You just finished listing off all the reasons she would hate it, and he clambered through the portrait hole with a dazed smile that a lovesick puppy would have.

You trailed behind the boys, watching them all fall onto comfortable couches and armchairs. You looked at your limp backpack indignantly, choosing instead to follow them.

You curled up in an armchair that was across a large couch occupied by James and Sirius and to the left of another armchair occupied by Peter. Peter leaned forwards to rest his elbows on his knees, setting up a new chess game for him and Remus to play. Remus sat on the ground, eyelevel with the board. He noticed you looking at him and gave you a kind smile that made you look away, blushing.

The night was spent in leisure. You had barely wanted to get up for dinner, even Sirius suggested making Peter go down to the kitchens so they wouldn’t all have to go to the hall. In the end, you all went, having just as much of a good time as you did at lunch.

You wished them a goodnight after you fell asleep watching Sirius and Remus levitating the most valuable things they could find in the room, sending Peter into anxious fits every time they pretended to loose their balance. You groggily walked up the stairs to the dormitories, leaving your homework downstairs with a satisfied sigh.

For a few moments before you fell asleep again, Remus’s brilliant and bright smile was burned behind your eyes.

(-)

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Sirius groaned, throwing himself dramatically onto the couch with a huff.

“Shud up,” Remus groaned, falling into the armchair you had been sitting in. He could smell you on the chair, your scent floating into his nose like it was intoxicating.

“Really botched that one, mate,” James said with a chuckle, picking up a few of his Quidditch magazines off of the floor and putting them back on the coffee table, where Peter had accidentally knocked them off.

“Romance is confusing! How was I supposed to know?!” Remus groaned, lifting his head from his hands with a desperate look.

James gave him a knowing smirk, and Sirius groaned again.

“It was obvious! You always offer to walk a romantic interest home,” Sirius said, twirling his wand in his hand.

“They were just going upstairs,” Peter mumbled, seeming to agree with Remus.

“It’s alright, Moony,” James said, standing from the couch with a look of determination, “you’ve got all week to seduce them.”

“Shud up,” Remus groaned, repeating his request from earlier.

His eyes fell to the stairs you had climbed moments ago, remembering the peaceful look on your face as you slept, the adorable stretch you did once you woke up, the tired way you climbed the stairs, and that beautiful smile you gave them when you said goodnight.

Remus decided to stay in the common room for a bit longer once his friends had went upstairs, trying to force every second from the time you spent together that day into his memory permanently.

(-)

You woke up feeling more rested than you had in weeks. The sun was barely in the sky when you opened the curtains, your unusually empty room flooded with orange light. You dressed quickly, donning muggle clothes that you found incredibly comfortable.

You went down to the common room, seeing that the mess the boys had made last night was either cleaned by them or house elves. There was no sign of life in the Gryffindor tower, besides yourself, so you assumed the four were still soundly asleep upstairs.

You found your backpack, overflowing with loose papers, and shrugged it onto your shoulders. You had decided to get some work done today, seeing as your day off the day before was not scheduled.

You ate a quick breakfast in the empty hall, finding it odd and strangely discomforting to be in such a large room by yourself. It felt as if you were out past curfew.

The library was the same case. Madam Pince was not even at her desk yet, and you settled into a table by the window. You opened it a sliver, enjoying the cold winter air that seeped into the room. The sunlight warmed you, and the wind was gentle enough to not rustle your papers.

You dove into your work, feeling considerably better than yesterday, or the past month. Your muscles were loose, and the pressure you had been putting on yourself was no longer there. One night of fun proved to be harmless, and so did the marauders.

You smiled at the thought of it, at the thought of your little day with Remus. He had been so kind to you, so funny and charming. You had never liked someone as much as you liked Remus.

You found your gaze drifting out the window, looking past the castle and Hagrid’s hut and out into the Forbidden Forest. You couldn’t think of anything but the curly headed, dirty blonde boy. The way his eyes nervously darted to yours, his sheepish smile. The way he could easily make James, Sirius, and Peter fall into doubled-over laughter, almost as if good-naturedness came to him as easily as walking did.

The sun rose in the sky, and it was almost time for lunch. Even with your mind distracted, you had gotten done more work than you had expected. You decided that if the boys asked you to have lunch with them again, you wouldn’t decline.

It was as if your thoughts were read, because just as you were organizing your papers to put them away, Remus walked into the library. You fumbled a bit, realizing you smudged some fresh ink on your newly written Potions notes. You didn’t care, though, smiling widely and waving Remus over.

“Alright?” he asked groggily, rubbing his eyes as if he had just woken up.

“Yeah, you?” you couldn’t help but stare at him. His voice was deep and thick with sleep, and he pulled the sleeves of his sweater over his slender hands. He had a muggle novel tucked under his arm, and he put it on the table as he sat down across from you.

“Eh,” he started, looking at you with slight amusement, “James woke up at the crack of dawn to go to the pitch, and he woke up Sirius when he did. Sirius is a git if he gets woken up before noon.”

“That’s not a surprising piece of information,” you chuckled, setting down your papers and getting comfortable in your seat again.

“Yeah, best to stay out of the dorm when Sirius is in a mood. Peter went to ask for some extension on a paper he forgot to do,” Remus smiled fondly at his friends flaws, opening his book and propping it on his knee, “so I figured I’d come find you.”

“You found me,” you opened your ink bottle and dipped your quill into it, going over your Potions notes and fixing the smudged ink.

You were a bit disappointed by Remus’s reasons for coming to see you. Part of you had hoped he missed you, or enjoyed your presence. But the truth was that you were his only other option for company. Your chest deflated slightly as you stole a glance at him only to find him deeply invested in his book. Many conversation starters bubbled in your throat but you couldn’t bring yourself to voice any of them.

It was about an hour of silence in the library before Remus suggested lunch. He helped you pack up your things, humming under his breath as he led the way out of the library.

Lunch was soup, which you didn’t mind too much. Sirius was already at the table with James when you arrived. Remus sat next to you, across from his friends.

Sirius had his head propped up in his hand, lazily bringing soup to his mouth before dropping the spoon into the bowl with a clatter as his eyes fluttered shut. James rolled his eyes, shoving the bowl of soup away from him and wiping up the splattered mess from the table.

James eagerly dove into a cheery conversation about his solo Quidditch practice, and Remus reluctantly listened. You felt as exhausted as Sirius looked, even though you had a wonderful nights sleep. You hadn’t felt so tired until your upsetting thoughts about Remus, but now you could barely keep your eyes open. You hadn’t been sitting for more than ten minutes, your soup was barely eaten, but you just wanted to curl up in your dorm.

Peter came into the hall, filing down the row where you had Remus were sitting. He was getting close, and you stood.

“Here, Peter, have my seat,” you said, slowly standing as James’ face contorted with confusion. You could see him working out pleas for you to stay, and your heart warmed a bit.

“I’m gonna have a lay down,” you excused, not waiting for Sirius’s head to lift from his hand or for James to suggest all of you walking back together.

As you walked away, you heard Peter begin to chat about his essay extension.

(-)

Remus knew he had done something wrong. He knew it.

You had seemed happy to see him, you smiled at him, you were friendly, but at some point he said something to make you close off. He was looking forward to spending the morning in the library with you. He had made up the excuse of getting out of the dorm, knowing that with Pete and James gone and Sirius out cold, it would be fairly peaceful. Remus, however, wanted to see you.

You looked heavenly dressed in casual muggle clothes with the morning sun lighting your face. He was happy to sit with you, but you didn’t seem happy to sit with him.

He wondered if you were bothered by him and his friends. If yesterday hadn’t been as fun as he thought it was, and if you just wanted to be left alone. He felt a surge of annoyance with James for being so forward, but quickly drowned that out. It wasn’t James’s fault.

Remus stared into his bowl of soup, not listening to Pete as he complained about the essay he had to write.

James indulged Pete, listening to his complaints with sympathy as he dipped his bread into his soup. Sirius, however, could not be bothered.

He had come to attention when you left the table, watching your hunched shoulders and nervous hands pushing your hair off your face. He had even caught your sad glance over you shoulder at Remus before you finally turned to go upstairs. Sirius was thinking, he was thinking hard. He could read you and Remus like an open book. He had known you liked Remus since you started showing up to the library whenever Remus did, no matter how subtle you thought you were being.

Sirius looked at his friend, confusion knitted in his eyebrows as he hunched over his food. He gasped silently, catching James’s attention, as his eyes lit up with an idea.

(-)

For the next couple of days, it was not hard to avoid your fellow housemates. James and Sirius seemed to be sneaking off as often as they could, clutching their cloaks close to them as if they had something underneath them.

You avoided Remus, who presumably only had Pete to keep him company now, by staying in your dorm. The library wasn’t the only place you could study, and you spread your books all across Lily’s bed. You had begun to enjoy studying in your dorm, it was private and quiet, with no Madam Pince staring you down from her desk.

It wasn’t that you disliked the marauders’ company, because you didn’t. You really liked hanging out with the boys. You had just wanted to prevent any more heartache when hanging out with Remus. You had obsessed over your last interaction in the library, convincing yourself it would be best to stay away from the boy as to not attach yourself any further.

It was nearing the weekend, Christmas on the upcoming Saturday. You didn’t want to be in solitude on Christmas, but your pride prevented you from asking to hang out with the boys. You didn’t know what Sirius and James were up to, and you didn’t want to know. You didn’t feel like hanging out with Peter, because being in his presence alone made you just as anxious as he was. And Remus, Remus was an entirely different story. Just seeing Remus made your heart race unnervingly.

On Thursday night, you crept down the dormitory stairs and into the common room. You stopped and waited to hear for Peter and Remus, but it seemed they were still in their room. You were going down for an early dinner, hoping to eat quickly before everyone else came down.

You seemed to be successful, your plate was nearly cleared and there was no sign of anyone else. You were serving yourself pudding, your favorite pudding, when someone sat across from you.

You looked up. Your throat closed involuntarily, and your spoon froze on it’s way to your mouth. You straightened your back, eyes widening at the sight of him, and wiped your mouth nervously with your napkin.

“Hey, Remus,” you said, smiling politely at him as he began to dish himself food, “where are the rest of the boys?”

“Just me,” he said, his voice sounding a little higher than usual.

“Are you alright?” you watched him carefully as you noticed his posture was straighter than usual.

“Yeah,” he chuckled, looking at you now.

You looked at him, squinting your eyes. He seemed off, but you figured he could be nervous without his friends around.

“Okay,” you trailed off, returning to your pudding.

“Haven’t seen you much, recently,” he said confidently, the usual softness in his voice absent.

“I’ve just been up in my dorm,” you said, still gazing at him cautiously.

“Don’t want to spend time with Sirius, James, and I?”

You bit your lip, looking at him with a serious expression. Remus never excluded Peter when he was talking about his friends, but Sirius often did. You noted it, unsure what that could mean. Had Remus asked Sirius on advice at how to talk to you? The thought made you suppress nervous giggles.

“No, it’s not that,” you felt your cheeks warm under his blatant stare, “you know how crazy I am about the N.E.W.T.’s.”

Remus chuckled under his breath, slowly eating his pudding. This was also weird, because Remus usually devoured any food in front of him as if he was a starving animal.

“Remus, are you sure your alright?” you squinted at him, dropping your spoon and propping your chin up with your hand.

“Yes, I’m fine,” he said nonchalantly, squinting back at you.

He had remarkably less patience and ease than usual.

“Okay, well, I’m done eating. I think I’ll go back to the tower now,” you stood slowly, watching his face contort with urgency.

“Wait!” he called, standing too, “wait, come sit for a second.”

You joined him again, clearly suspicious. You wondered if he was distracting you while the boys set up a prank.

“I need to ask you something,” he whispered seriously, leaning closer to you over the table.

“What?”

“Do you fancy me?” he smirked at you, mischief in his eyes.

At first you wanted to shrink away, blush madly and sputter out lies to conceal your true feelings. But you didn’t. You kept his stare, a blank face looking into his daring one. You decided to make a guess.

“Sirius?” you said confidently, so it didn’t sound like a wild guess. You knew it was crazy. Surely, Sirius would never transfigure into his best friend to eat dinner alone with you and ask him about your feelings for him. Surely.

“How did you know!?” he asked, his voice now completely Sirius’s instead of his weird imitation of Remus’s voice.

“What!?” you questioned back, surprised that you were right, “It’s actually you, Sirius?”

Sirius’s face, well, still Remus’s face, dropped with disappointment, upset that he gave himself away.

“Yes,” he mumbled, moving his hand to tuck his hair behind his ear, only to remember Remus’s hair wasn’t that long.

“What are you playing at? How did you do this?” you motioned your hands at him, sounding more amazed than angry.

“Polyjuice Potion,” he said mischievously, his eyes meeting yours at the tone of your voice.

“That’s really advance stuff, Sirius,” you said, slightly impressed as you leaned back and crossed your arms.

“I had some help,” he said sneakily, and suddenly what he and James had been sneaking off for made sense.

“Are you two planning something? Testing out the costume on me?” you said excitedly, hoping the boys would let you in on whatever prank they had planned.

“Well, about that,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck, “you sort of were the plan.”

You looked at him, confused. It felt weird to be talking so casually with Remus, and you fought the urge to blush every time he looked at you, knowing it was actually Sirius.

“I know you fancy Remus,” Sirius said, sounding a bit guilty.

This time, you could not resist shrinking away and blushing. You looked down at your lap, feeling incredibly embarrassed.

“But,” Sirius started again, his voice oddly comforting and kind, “I know Remus likes you, too.”

Your eyes shot up to meet Sirius’s, your face becoming somehow even more flushed.

“You were trying to get me to admit it to you? That I like him?” you asked him, heart racing.

“I just wanted you to confirm it,” he said, sounding even more guilty, “I didn’t want to try and set you two up if you didn’t like him back-”

“Set us up?!” you interrupted, eyes wide.

“Yeah,” he said casually.

“How do you plan on doing that, then?” You tried to sound annoyed in an attempt to hide just how excited you were.

Sirius had waved over James immediately, who has hiding behind a pillar in the courtyard looking in on you and Sirius. The two began talking almost as animatedly as two schoolgirls stricken with an exciting prospect of romance.

You watched, lazily propping your chin on your hand as they rambled on about the ways they thought you should confront Remus.

James had been quite keen on them influencing Remus to confront you, and Sirius reckoned you ought to “grow a pair” and kiss him yourself. James was nearly affronted by the idea, insisting on a classic and romantic gesture from Remus’s behalf.

Either way, you couldn’t fight an embarrassed blush that seemed permanently glued onto your cheeks. You swallowed heavily at any mention of kissing, which was being discussed at length. You had half a mind to stop the hopeful ramblings, but James and Sirius were Remus’s best friends, they had to be somewhat right about his feelings for you.

The conversation got remarkably easier, too, once the potion had warn off and it was Sirius in front of you instead of a fake Remus.

You looked into the courtyard, enjoying the cold air lofting into the room through the open doors, when you noticed Remus and Peter entering the room. The cold air had been helping in cooling your cheeks, but at the sight of Remus’s wide and carefree smile, they warmed immediately.

“Shut up!” you mumbled harshly to the still ranting dark-haired boys in front of you, kicking them each in the shin for good measure.

They looked offended, but Sirius caught your eye and smirked once he realized why they were silenced.

“Have you guys eaten already?” Peter asked, sounding disappointed as he sat next to you and saw your empty bowl of pudding.

“Just had an early lunch,” James said merrily, moving to scoop himself another bowl of pudding after he had eaten an entire lunch while he and Sirius were talking, “but we’ll stay while you guys eat.”

You swallowed hard, looking at James with wide eyes as he quirked an eyebrow at you. You were planning on leaving the second Remus sat between James and Sirius, right across from you, but now you couldn’t be so obvious.

“Haven’t seen you in a while, Y/n,” Peter mumbled from beside you, stuffing his face with a large heaping of peas.

You looked to Remus almost automatically, only to see him looking questioningly at you. You couldn’t resist the small smile that flirted on your lips as he averted your gaze quickly.

“I can’t get much work done with you lot around,” you teased, clearing the table in front of you and resting your elbows there, “I’ve been in my dorm, most days.”

“What about for Christmas?” Peter pried curiously, “Will you leave your dorm for Christmas?”

“Of course they will!” James boomed from across the table, causing a few tired looking Ravenclaws who were just coming in to glare at him apprehensively, “Starting Christmas Eve, they won’t be able to get rid of us.”

“Oh,” you looked to him, eyebrows raised in entertainment, “I won’t?”

Remus looked between you and James with an excited smile.

“Of course not,” Sirius said for James, picking a carrot off of Peter’s plate from across the table.

“For a limited time,” James said mysteriously, “you will have the honor of becoming a temporary Marauder.”

“They what?” Peter said from his goblet of pumpkin juice, causing some to splash back in his face.

“Peter!” Sirius groaned, annoyed with the boy, “Get in the holiday spirit!”

“Don’t worry Pete, just for a limited time. The holidays are a season of extending great charity to others,” James said, talking with humor in his tone.

“Charity?” you repeated, an amused smile on your face.

“We don’t let in just anyone,” Remus said, looking only at you.

When your eyes met his, you felt all the air leave your lungs. Your jaw clenched in an attempt to gather some sort of consciousness, but all you could do was look back at Remus.

“That’s true, ‘tis a great honor,” Sirius had raised his goblet in some sort of toast, and you had barely noticed until Remus was raising his glass.

You broke the contact, finally, and sputtered for a moment before you could find your goblet on the table. You rose it, hoping to lower it quickly as you noticed a slight tremble in your hand. Remus connected his goblet with yours gently, looking at you again while you were intent on avoiding his eyes. He had some sort of knowing smile on his face, and you felt very exposed to him. It felt like he was reaching in your chest and squeezing your heart for his own pleasure, and it scared you to know you could not tell him to stop.

(-)

Christmas Eve was very celebrated amongst the boys.

So celebrated, in fact, that Sirius insisted Christmas morning was a day for hangovers.

He had brought out the firewhisky fairly early into the afternoon. James had looked at him with nervousness, but nonetheless took a heaping sip when offered a glass. You sipped casually, not feeling all too comfortable with the chaos that seemed to lurk in Sirius’s eyes.

By the time the sun was beneath the horizon, Sirius and James were dancing some sort of Irish jig on a table, and Peter was very angrily talking to himself in a mirror. You and Remus, neither of you having very much to drink, sat comfortably on a couch, watching the night unfold.

“Why aren’t you drinking with them?” you asked Remus, glancing at his full cup and tensed shoulders.

He glanced down at you, nervously biting his lip and running a hand through his hair. Oh, how you wanted to touch his hair.

“I don’t really feel like being hungover on Christmas,” he said, noticing your full cup as well, “what about you?”

“I don’t think Lily would ever forgive me if she found out I got drunk with you lot on Christmas Eve,” you teased, smiling to yourself at the fond thought of your friend.

“I miss Lily,” Remus remarked simply, bringing his cup to his lips and taking a large gulp.

“Me too,” you sighed, doing the same and hoping it would ease your nerves, “she wrote to me yesterday. She’s having a lovely Christmas. Her sister is being awful, but that’s per usual.”

You and Remus shared a knowing smile, both thinking of the complaints you had heard from Lily about her sister.

“Have you written back yet?”

“No, not yet. I was going to wait until after Christmas,” you were waiting to write Lily back so you could thank her first for the undoubtedly wonderful present she got you. You didn’t know how, but Lily Evans always gave the most thoughtful presents.

“When you do, tell her we miss her,” Remus said softly, his cheeks beginning to flush pink as he watched with a smile his friends dancing.

You nodded, ducking your head to hide a smile.

“Oi!” James yelled, stopping his dance suddenly.

You and Remus froze as he looked at the pair of you, each wearing an entertained smile. James hopped off the table with ease, as if he was not drunk out of his mind and as if the table wasn’t a good four feet off the ground.

“Come dance,” James said once he finally reached the both of you, though, only offering you his hand.

He waved his wand at a muggle radio they had in the corner, and the volume increased. Sirius smiled widely, refreshing his drink with the dwindling amount of firewhisky left. You cautiously took James’s hand, letting him spin you as you giggled.

James caught Remus’s eye, the blonde boy watching you with adoration. James pulled you close, resting one hand on your shoulder as the other held your hand, and leaned in close to your ear.

“Moony is watching you,” he slurred, sounding excited, “I reckon he’ll make a move tonight if Sirius doesn’t finish all the liquor for himself!”

James pulled away, giggling once again like a schoolgirl. You could not help his infectious laughter, your forehead falling onto his shoulder as you laughed loudly. As if on que, Remus stood and walked with determination to Sirius. He took Sirius’s goblet and downed it, smiling widely and accomplishedly afterwards. He climbed on the table with Sirius, who had long forgotten about his stolen alcohol, and began awkwardly moving his lanky body in a way that could be called dancing in the most generous of terms. This made you laugh even more, and James had to nearly fully support your weight as your knees buckled with your hard laughter.

It was shaping up to be a lovely Christmas Eve.

(-)

Christmas, as Sirius had predicted, was a morning for hangovers. You had barely glanced at your mounds of presents at the foot of your bed, instead throwing on your warmest sweater and going immediately to breakfast.

It had been decorated, as it had all week, with great care. Today, however, the tree had been alit with wonderful and delicate decorations, sparkling under the enchanted ceiling. The entire room somehow smelled of pine, and the warm feeling of a fireplace shot down your spine when you sat down.

You cradled a cup of tea, hunching over and fighting the urge to fall back asleep at the table. You couldn’t bear to look at food yet, regretting the glasses you drank once Sirius had found that second bottle of firewhisky.

There was no sign of life in the castle, besides the lovely decorations, and you found yourself grateful.

It was as if, however, that you cursed yourself the second you thought this.

“Merry Christmas, Y/n!” James shouted from the entry way of the castle, his loud voice assaulting your ears even from such a distance. Beside him, Peter, Sirius, and Remus cringed away in pain, shrinking down and walking past him into the hall.

“Bloody. Fucking. Hell,” Sirius groaned once he sat down next to you, his head hitting the table as soon as he was still.

Remus sat on the other side of you, going at once for heaping servings of the hot food. You swallowed the vomit in your throat at the sight of so much food, forcing your eyes deep into your tea. James happily sat down next to Peter on the other side of the table, patting his friend merrily on the back. Peter winced audibly, a pained look on his face.

“How are you not hungover?” you whispered once you were sure you would not vomit.

“He never gets hungover,” Remus groaned from beside you, his mouth full of beans.

“Never?” you repeated, wincing as you reached for more tea.

“Never!” James said happily, obviously enjoying his wonderful, wonderful gift.

“Oi!” Sirius groaned, his head still buried in his arms.

James smiled.

“Eating helps, really,” Remus said from beside you, glancing an earnest look at you as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Mmmmm,” you groaned in response, ducking your head down as Sirius was doing to avoid vomiting.

“What a lovely Christmas this will be!” James said, earning a unanimous groan in response.

(-)

Getting back to the tower was a slow and painful process that included many bathroom breaks and headaches. You and Sirius had both ducked into the loo twice each to vomit, and James supposed it had something to do with climbing the stairs. Peter was limping for some reason, though you could not remember him hurting either of his legs the night before. Remus was nearly as recovered as James, just looking a bit tired.

After you were sure you had emptied your stomach of the tea you drank for breakfast, you were feeling a bit better. Your legs felt a little wobbly, and Remus must have noticed, because he offered his arm for you to steady yourself on as you walked along. Your mind was so foggy you almost had not noticed, but his strong arm beneath your fingers was enough to clear you up a little. You held him close to you, hoping the hangover was excuse enough. James gave you and encouraging smile, nodding enthusiastically. You were sure Sirius would be giving you a smirk if he wasn’t basically crawling down the halls.

Once you reached the common room, Remus had not retracted his arm. In fact, he had interlocked his hand with yours, still with your arms looped, and led you over to a couch. He sat very close to you and still did not remove himself from your grasp even as you were sitting. You felt so comfortable and warm next to him, you could not help but close your eyes and let your head fall on his shoulder.

(-)

James retreated upstairs with Peter. Peter had wanted a quick and undisturbed nap, and James returned downstairs a few moments later with his practice Quidditch robes on. Sirius had collapsed on an armchair the second he crawled into the room, and showed no indication of life as he fell into a deep sleep. James gave Remus an encouraging smile and two thumbs up, but did not dare to speak in case you weren’t asleep. Remus rolled his eyes, but was truly quite happy with the position he had found himself in.

Your arms were looped, hands intertwined, and your head rested delicately on his shoulder. He leaned his head against yours, breathing in the smell of your shampoo.

He had wanted to stay there forever.

(-)

When they all awoke, James was out of his Quidditch robes and in a thick wool sweater. He was polishing his broom with what looked like a new polishing set, perched on the armrest of a couch across from you and Remus. You had woken up when Sirius did, his loud yawns and stretches filling the room. When you lifted your head, you bumped into Remus’s head, and he woke up. Your cheek felt sore from pressing into his strong shoulder, and you looked down at you hands to see them still interlocked. You were sweaty and tired, but Remus looked down at you sleepily with complete happiness.

“Happy Christmas, you lazy bones,” James tutted like a mother would, putting down his broom and standing.

“Happy Christmas,” Remus said, smiling widely.

You sat up, removing yourself from Remus. He untangled your arms, removing his hand from yours. You felt sad at the absence, looking down at your lonely hand. Remus was looking too, and when you met his eyes he bit his bottom lip. With some slight hesitation, he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you in for a side hug. You lingered, and he made no move to pull away, so you stayed there, tucked under his arm.

“I never looked at my presents this morning,” Sirius said, standing from his chair and motioning for James to follow him.

“Neither did I,” you said to Remus only, hearing the other two retreating upstairs.

“Want me to walk you up to your dorm?” he offered, adjusting his body so he could see your face.

You uncurled from him, nodding excitedly.

You stood from the couch, walking over to the stairs. You waited for Remus, watching as he slowly stood and stretched. You leaned against the door frame, supporting yourself on your hands behind you. Remus came over to you, walking slowly with a sleepy and dazed look on his face.

“Happy Christmas,” he repeated, only to you this time.

“Happy Christmas,” you said, smiling at him as he leaned against the door frame opposite of you.

It was a narrow space, and there were only a few inches between you two, but neither of you made any movement. You wanted to go upstairs and see what your family had sent, what Lily had given you, what all your friends had given you, but you couldn’t tear yourself from the handsome boy in front of you.

Your eyes danced all over his face, admiring his curly and unkempt hair that fell into his dark and kind eyes, his sharp jaw that you wanted to run your fingers across, his soft lips.

You were both so entrance in each other, that neither of you had noticed the greenery sprouting from the door frame above you. It was mistletoe, sprouting from the wooden door frame between you and Remus. Remus noticed, his eyes darting up at it. He looked down at you, seeing you had not noticed it, and chuckled.

This seemed to snap you out of it, and you stood upright, coming closer to Remus. You looked up at the growing plant, eyes widening when you saw the red berry forming before your eyes.

“Mistletoe?” Remus chuckled, entertained as he reached up and brushed it delicately with his slender fingers.

“Is it?” you managed to say, watching his hand.

“It is,” he said, retracting his hand and bringing it to rest on your cheek.

He gently cupped your face, pulling you close to him until your chests met and neither of your backs were touching the door frame. You closed the distance, meeting his lips with urgency and desperation. You didn’t care if James thought Remus ought to kiss you, you wanted nothing more than to kiss Remus. And Remus wanted nothing more than to kiss you. His other hand came to your waist, pulling you flush against him as his hand on your cheek moved to the side of your neck. You reached up and slid your hands from his shoulders to this neck and into his hair, feeling the soft curls between your fingers as you had wanted to for so long.

Remus pulled you impossibly close to him, as if he wanted nothing to come between you, until his force was moving you to lean against the door frame. The feeling of the wood was unexpected, and you gasped into Remus’s mouth when you felt it. Remus took this as an invitation to deepen the kiss, and you allowed him, sighing softly as his tongue explored your mouth.

“Mistletoe?!”

You and Remus broke apart, his hands still on you even though your bodies were no longer touching. You both looked up the stairs, seeing James, Sirius, and Peter looking down at you.

Sirius had the most mischievous smirk you had ever seen, sure that it would make Lily’s skin crawl if she saw it. James seemed so content that you’d think he’d just been kissed and Peter anxiously twirled his fingers as he averted your eyes, obviously feeling bad for interrupting.

“Mistletoe,” Remus said, his voice husk and his lips wet. It took a lot of will power to not sigh at the sight of him, or pull him in by his collar and kiss him again. Instead, you looked up at the boys like a deer caught in headlights.

“You owe me ten galleons,” James said to Sirius, causing Sirius to groan.

“How do you know he kissed them?!” Sirius complained, digging in his robe pockets for the money.

“He didn’t, I kissed him,” you said, looking up at Remus and licking your lips nervously.

“Hah! Hand it over, James,” Sirius gloated, removing his hand from his pocket and holding it out to James.

James groaned, still a smile on his lips, and handed Sirius the money.

“You didn’t think I’d kiss them first?” Remus asked Sirius, pulling you into his chest in a loving and protective way.

“Sorry, mate,” Sirius said with no remorse in his voice, climbing down the stairs and pushing past you and Remus.

James and Peter followed him, all fiddling with some new gift they had gotten. You looked up at Remus, deciding your Christmas presents could wait until Boxing Day, and pulled him out of the door way. You fell onto the couch, Remus following you, and you fell easily into conversation with the boys. Remus wrapped an arm around you, pulling you into his chest.

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spencers-renaissance · 3 years

Text

Foolishly, Completely Falling

Summary: Spencer declines to spend the night with Luke, but there's a reason for that, and things start to click into place when Spencer shows back up at his doorstep at 2am, hours after being dropped home.

Tags: hurt/comfort, fluff, angst, past toxic relationship, nightmares, est/dev relationship

Pairing: Luke x Spencer

Word count: 2.5k

Read on AO3

When Luke asks Spencer if he wants to stay the night for the first time, he isn’t as quick to agree like Luke expects. The TV is playing a game show on low volume and they’re lying comfortably together on the sofa, quietly enjoying one another’s company after a busy day. They’d had a lovely evening out at the Mexican restaurant Luke had managed to convince Spencer to try before a cuddle and far too much making out on the sofa, so he’s feeling pretty good when he whispers the question into his boyfriend’s ear. Instead of the excited agreement he expects, though -- after all, the first night in the same bed with a new partner is always exhilarating -- Spencer freezes.

“Hey,” Luke says, tone quickly sobering up. He shifts a little to get a better look at his boyfriend’s face, worried he’d said the wrong thing. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to, baby. We can just cuddle a little longer and then I’ll drive you home, yeah? Whatever you want.”

The kind voice he uses seems to slowly shake Spencer out of his frozen trance, gradually pulling himself up from the quicksand of his thoughts to respond to Luke. “No, I want to,” he explains slowly, thankful Luke is so patient when he tries to articulate complicated feelings. “There’s just… it’s because-- I don’t know how to tell you.” He sighs in defeat as he fails to tell his boyfriend how he feels, slumping down a little as he relaxes his previously stiffened muscles, collapsing into the warmth and safety of Luke’s chest.

“You don’t have to justify it, Spencer,” Luke says earnestly, running his hands up and down Spencer’s arms gently as his face contorts with worry, a small sense of relief coming from the feeling of his boyfriend physically relaxing under his touch. He can’t help but feel a sinking pit of fear in his stomach that maybe he’s made a massive misstep, maybe Spencer isn’t as into this as he is, maybe there’s something really, really wrong.

Instead of voicing his concerns, though, he simply revels in the moment: Spencer’s head on his chest, his body flush against his own as their breathing syncs and they take in the last few moments of peace before the world switches back on and they have to part ways.

If only he could stop his tumbling mind and enjoy it properly.

★

Spencer seems mostly recovered from the awkward moment by the time they clamber into Luke’s car to drive him back home. He’s barely switched the engine on before Spencer is telling him about the technology of contactless keys and how they were invented, the dangers they present to society as well as the vulnerability they have to hacking before going on a tangent about a factory in Ireland that accidentally discovered a serious technological advancement. He’s chattering away happily in the passenger seat, and the tension Luke still holds in his shoulders dissipates as he listens to him ramble about things he cares about.

It’s hard to focus on the road, really, when Spencer chooses to be so utterly adorable. He can’t keep his eyes off him when he’s passionately lecturing somebody about something everyone else finds insignificant or confusing and he finds endlessly fascinating. The team makes fun of him constantly for the way he stares at his boyfriend, and he’s not overly fond of the new nickname ‘moon eyes’ that he can’t seem to shake, but it won’t stop him from appreciating Spencer’s knowledge, making sure he knows Luke supports him no matter what. He knows that he gets shut down far too often, that people appreciate him for his intellect only when it’s valuable to him, and he’ll be damned if he ever makes him feel that way.

He listens dutifully the whole drive back to Spencer’s apartment, managing to drive safely despite the distraction, and he can’t suppress the laugh at the surprised look colouring Spencer’s face once he sees they’ve arrived. He goes into a little bubble when he’s info-dumping, only coming out of it when there’s a significant change in his environment, but Luke can’t stop the fondness from spreading through his body as if it’s the first time he’s ever seen Spencer make that face.

“We’re here,” Spencer observes, a slightly sheepish look spreading across his features.

Luke absolutely cannot accept that so he leans across the console to press a deep and loving kiss to his lips, startling Spencer out of his embarrassment as he kisses back with just as much vigour. “You want me to walk you up?” Luke asks as he pulls away, bringing a hand to Spencer’s face to gently brush a few curls off his forehead.

“I’m good,” Spencer smiles, looking adoringly at Luke. If he was a more acrimonious man he’d be annoyed that everyone misses the matching looks Spencer sends his way, but there’s something special about them being just for him, like there’s a little bit of him he gets to keep just for himself. He’ll take that over Spencer getting teased even more any day.

“Okay, baby.” He leans in to give him another kiss, quickly this time, before leaning up to peck his forehead, too. “You sleep well. If we’re not called in tomorrow I’ll swing by and we can do something together, how does that sound?”

“Perfect,” Spencer says softly. He puts his hand on top of Luke’s and caresses his knuckles gently, and for a second Luke is convinced he’s about to say something but he decides against it, settling on a soft smile before he’s clumsily climbing out of the car and walking towards the elevator into the building.

The shy wave Spencer gives him just as the elevator doors close is enough to keep his heart warm through winter.

★

Luke heads straight to bed as soon as he gets back home, switching off all the lights and getting ready in the bathroom before slipping between the sheets. It’s barely 11 but he’s exhausted from a busy day at work followed by the date he’d had with Spencer and he can feel the exhaustion tugging at his limbs. He’d hoped that he would be cuddled against a warm body tonight, and Spencer’s absence makes the bed feel so cold, even with Roxy warming his feet.

Eventually, he manages to slip off to sleep, though, because he’s woken up not long after by Roxy leaping off the bed and whining at his bedroom door, startling him awake. “Roxy?” he asks, immediately on high alert. “What’s wrong, girl?” He sleepily pushes the covers off him, exposing himself to the frigid air of his apartment as he contemplates reaching for his gun when he hears it. There’s a tentative knock at the door, probably not the first, far too quiet to have woken him up if he hadn’t had Roxy. He jumps into action and pulls a t-shirt on as he walks to his front door, flicking on the lights as he goes, not wanting to trip over anything in the dark.

It’s Spencer. He’s standing there looking nothing short of distraught as he wrings his hands nervously in front of him, that sheepish, embarrassed look Luke had been so desperate to kiss away earlier returned in full force.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, looking close to tears. “I just, I didn’t know where to go… usually I go to JJ’s but Henry and Michael are staying with Penelope tonight so she and Will could have a proper date night again and I didn’t want to interrupt but I didn’t want to be alone so I thought that maybe… maybe it would be okay if I came to see you, but I’m sorry if--”

“Hey,” Luke gently intercepts Spencer’s rambling with a careful hand on his waist and a step closer. “Why don’t you come in?”

It’s a bit of a shock to see his boyfriend on his doorstep only hours after he’d dropped him off, especially since he’s clearly in quite a state, a very different Spencer to the one who had kissed him deeply and waved him goodbye earlier in the evening, but Luke doesn’t want to do another thing until Spencer is happy again, feeling safe and comforted. He’s going to try damn hard to do that for him.

“I’m sorry, Luke,” he apologises again, voice tight and anxious, eyes glassy as he follows him inside and hesitantly sits next to him on the sofa. “I should have asked before turning up here and I’m sure I woke you up. God, I’m such an idiot sometimes, I should just--”

“Spencer,” Luke says, voice a little louder to cut over Spencer’s panicked word vomit. “You are always welcome here. No matter what, okay? You don’t have to be afraid to come here, ever. I’m your boyfriend, I want to take care of you.”

“Really?” he asks, looking almost floored at Luke’s words.

“Really.” Luke promises, reaching over to gently wipe a spilled tear from Spencer’s cheekbone. “If I was upset, wouldn’t you feel the same way.”

Spencer’s eyes widen in understanding as he nods vigorously, causing Luke to smile fondly.

“Now. What’s going on, baby? Did something happen?”

“Um,” Spencer hesitates, simultaneously not knowing how to properly voice his feelings and afraid of how Luke might react to them. Luckily, Luke knows how to be patient with Spencer, waiting quietly as he traces patterns on his forearm. “You know how earlier I said I did want to stay here but I couldn’t?”

Luke hums. “I do, yes.”

“Well, it’s because I was scared.”

Luke’s finger pauses for a short second in surprise before continuing its path, trying to convey his non-judgement. “What of, sweetheart?” he asks, praying that he wasn’t about to say him.

“The last time I shared a bed with someone, he wasn’t nice to me,” Spencer confesses, looking into Luke’s eyes briefly, long enough only for Luke to pick up on the intense vulnerability swimming in his pupils. “I get… really bad nightmares. And my ex, the one I told you about, George?” He waits for Luke’s acknowledging nod before continuing. “He got… angry. I disturbed his sleep and he yelled a lot before breaking up with me.”

Luke nods slowly, finally understanding the situation. “And you were afraid that the same thing would happen with me?” he asks gently, not judging Spencer for his fear at all and hoping he can see that in his eyes.

“Yeah,” he whispers, looking down at his twiddling fingers for a long moment before finally looking back at Luke, tears gathering in his eyes again. “I’m sorry, I should have trusted you.”

“Oh, Spencer,” he soothes calmly, gathering him up into a hug and carding his fingers through Spencer’s curls in just the way he knows he likes. “You can’t control a fear like that. It’s a natural reaction to be afraid of repeating a previous experience, especially if that event was upsetting or traumatic.”

“I know,” he mutters miserably, face wedged close into Luke’s neck. “I’m still sorry.”

“It’s okay, baby,” he says. “Is that what made you come over tonight? You had a nightmare?” He feels Spencer nod and his heart breaks. His boyfriend has been silently suffering through these awful nightmares alone, all because some asshole had broken up with him for something he couldn’t control. “I’m sorry, Spence. Do you want to talk about it?”

Spencer shakes his head, as he pulls his face away from Luke’s neck. “I’ve tried that but it doesn’t work,” he frowns. “It just makes me relive it and the anxiety gets worse. It’s better if I just try and acknowledge them before moving past them.”

“Whatever works for you, baby,” Luke says. “Now, how about we get you changed into some pajamas again and you can come and stay with me tonight. I just want to be here for you, Spencer, comfort you if you have a nightmare, hold you even if you don’t. Nothing will happen if you do have one, alright? Except you being able to avoid travelling across town at 2am to seek some comfort, because I’ll be right next to you, cuddles at the ready.”

“You promise?” Spencer asks hopefully, finally seeming to relax a little.

“I swear on my life,” Luke grins, before pressing a chaste kiss to Spencer’s lips and standing up. “Come on, let’s get ready for bed.”

Spencer’s wearing a soft t-shirt already but Luke demands he change into one of his own, claiming he wants him to be as comfortable as possible, but they both know he just can’t get enough of Spencer in his own clothes. It feels like an extra layer of protection Luke can wrap around him, keep him safe and warm in his clothing, protect him from anything formidable, including his own mind. “It smells of you,” he smiles approvingly as soon as it’s settled over his shoulders, too loose for his smaller frame.

“Well, baby, you’re gonna love cuddling with me in my bed then,” Luke winks. “I’m not sure anywhere else could possibly smell more like me.” He switches off the lights in the house and calls Roxy back to bed, before slipping underneath the duvet, which is much more pleasurable this time, Spencer curled up against his side as Luke wraps a comforting arm around his waist.

He savours Spencer’s satisfied sigh as he curls up tighter, pressing as close to Luke as possible; his clingy nature is one of the things he loves most about him. There’s nothing Spencer likes more than climbing into Luke’s lap or laying across him on the sofa, holding his hand in public or pressing himself as close as possible until Luke gets the hint and wraps an arm around his waist. He loves being held, which works out well because Luke isn’t sure he likes anything more than holding him, drinking in the comfort that comes from the closeness, the inexplicable feeling that is being Spencer Reid’s boyfriend.

“Thank you, Luke,” Spencer whispers, voice clearly showing how drained and tired he is, but he sounds relaxed and comfortable, and that’s what matters most.

“Anytime, baby,” he whispers back, smile playing over his lips as it always seems to do when he’s around Spencer. “You sleep now. You’re safe, I’ll be here.”

“I know.” Spencer’s whisper is even quieter this time as his breaths even out and his muscles relax slightly, and Luke has never envied his boyfriend’s eidetic memory more. If he could bottle this exact moment -- Spencer slowly falling asleep on him, trusting him enough to stay no matter what happens, the warmth and comfort of the embrace -- he’d never stop playing it over, a personal paradise just for the two of them recorded in his mind forever.

Just having this moment, though, having this memory all for himself, will do Luke just fine.

@gxenbev

#ralvez #luke alvez x spencer reid #luke #luke alvez #spencer #spencer reid #ralvez fic #ralvez writing #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #criminal minds writing #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds hurt/comfort #criminal minds angst #my writing

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hollyhomburg · 4 years

Note

can u show what happens after the snipts and i'm curious about the tae x reader, pretty please my heart is broken from that angst but the way you wrote is beautiful

here is the next part!

SANDCASTLES: SNIPPETS IN SEQUENCE (3) (YOONMINJOONSEOK X READER) (TAEHYUNG X READER) (OMEGAVERSE AU)

TAGS: angst, unplanned pregnancy, depression, loneliness, BETA! taehyung x reader

W/c: 3.5k

A/n: here you go! here are the beta Taehyung parts, as well as what happens immediately after she leaves the alphas and Jimin. The next part will be about what happens to them in the wake of her leaving, and I will say this; the next part has some heavy tags so be sure to watch out for those. ALSO- TAE IS THE VILLAN OF THIS STORY, but the beginning with him isn’t bad. he will eventually betray the reader so be prepared!

- You cry yourself to sleep every night the first week in your new apartment.

- It’s a nice place really, too nice- but your company had told you it was more than within your means when they booked it for you. and you can barely believe the first paycheck you get. it has an extra bedroom and a kitchen with a retro-style but new appliances and molding on the ceiling in the old district, full of restaurants and coffee shops that you live off for the first few weeks.

- You don’t have a bed frame yet, so your bed just sits on the carpeted floor. Your boxes scattered around you, the one that holds some of your books acts as a nightstand. Your new job isn’t that terrible- in fact they make every point to tell you how good it is to have someone capable fill the position, and how good you are at your job.

- After so long it’s nice to feel appreciated.

- You even make friends with two of the other women that work there, an omega female named Yeri, and an alpha female named Irene, who would have made you nervous if not for the mating mark clearly evident on her collar bone.

- Despite the fact that they were slightly under you in the company, they both treated you, the new girl, with kindness. They even invited you to have lunch with them and get to know them on your second day and showed you around the company.

- It wasn’t safe for an unmated omega in a new city they said, you ended up crying in the bathroom for a few hours after that- it used to be your dream to be marked by Namjoon, Yoongi, and Hoseok, and for them to bear your and Jimin's mark. But now that dream could never come to fruition.

- But they are kind- so kind. They don’t ask you where you came from or even if you have any family- keeping your conversations mostly on company gossip and pop culture. You end up going to see a movie with them in the second week. And by the end of the third, the three of you are the best of friends.

- You’d never really had any friends that where girls- after all you’d always had Jimin, you’d never needed anyone else other than him until now.

- You get a dresser and put your old phone (still turned off) in the top drawer once you get a company cellphone. You adjust well, your apartment overlooks a park and a small pond in the very middle of the bustling city. Your place of work is only 5 blocks away, and you find yourself enjoying your walk to work every morning.

- But you’re miserable, you can't breathe in the smell of coffee without thinking of Yoongi and feeling sick to your stomach, every time you hear music you think of all the times both Jimin and Hoseok used to drag you to your feet to dance.

- You cant even watch TV without your and Namjoon’s favorite documentary show coming on- or that drama you and Hoseok used to curl up and watch. - What’s more, is that it seems like you’re actually getting sick, your fever is raised and every time you go for lunch you end up vomiting it all back up a few minutes later. Even your favorite foods don’t stay down. you try to chalk it up to the stress of moving and being separated from your alphas (which has been known to happen in some omegas after they part with a pack, their instincts regecting their minds desire to stay away), but it seems like that's less the case the more time goes on.

- It happens one day at work while you sit and eat your lunch with Yeri (Irene had a meeting during your usual lunch hour- but she told you not to wait for her). and you narrowly avoid vomiting on your new white blouse before you lean over and throw up your sandwich in the waste paper basket, a sudden wave of vomiting hits you so harshly that Yeri looks more than a little concerned.

- After you assure her that yes- you’re going to the doctor soon about it, and yes you’ve been able to keep water down she gives you a final withering look before she offhandedly says, “fine just don’t go getting pregnant on me like Irene’s wife did- I swear now all the two of them ever want to do is watch baby TV and talk about their child’s poops.”

- Throughout the rest of the day her words stick with you, and you end up going home at the end of the day only to pacing your apartment for a few hours, before you head back out to the store to pick up a pregnancy test and some ice cream (because why not).

- You pace around your small unfurnished living room as you wait for the stick to give you your results.You never expected to do this alone- in your mind someone was always here with you, you even expected to have all of them there. You wanted Jimin's hand on yours more than anything, you wanted to grow massive with him, and maybe raise your children together if you could.

- You openly sob the stick comes back as positive, you pace around your apartment crying and thinking on your situation for the entirety of the night before you realize that you being pregnant does nothing to change your situation. this is the only time you strongly consider turning on your old phone. you didn’t know if there would even be messages waiting from you- probably from Jimin, but not from any of the others you’re sure.

- Out of all of them- it has to be namjoon’s, you think back to the time in the kitchen, how your front was pressed to the granite, how it felt impersonal, how you’d sent the email for your job immediately after. that was probably the day you got pregnant.

- the more you think about it, the more you're sure. you put your phone away and don’t turn it on. Why would they want you now? if anything this would only make them hate you more. they where good people, and they wouldn’t have let you do this alone, especially Jimin. but They would resent being tied to a pregnant omega that they weren’t mated too or even in love with- that you were sure of.

- you imagine it briefly, sure- you’d have them in your life, but only so far as your child would have a parent in Namjoon, and uncles in the rest. you imagine the awkward doctors visits, the offers to pay, needing to share your child between here and Seoul. whatever children they’d have one day with Jimin, would be cousins to yours, and whatever children he’d have with Namjoon. well- they’d have the love of all the alphas, not just Namjoon. and you don’t want your child to feel any less loved because of your mistakes.

- So You’d have to raise your child alone, in a city that you barely knew. Without any support system. Sure your new friend were great but they were so new. So to distract yourself from your situation, the fact that you’re going to do all of this alone, and the fact that you left your baby’s father- You drown yourself in work, staying later than anyone else consistently, falling into your bed exhausted.

- You go to your prenatal appointments alone, and when you start getting cravings, there’s no one to lean over to in the middle of the night and ask for chocolate sauce and watermelon, or barbecue mayonnaise and mac and cheese fries, you get up and do it yourself.

- By week 5 of your pregnancy, your hormones have started to change enough that one day you walk into work and Yeri almost screams in happiness, congratulating you and jumping in your arms when she notices how your scent has changed. It’s only when she pulls back and sees your withdrawn sad expression that she says, “oh honey…” and Irene slaps her on the arm lightly as she tries to broach the topic of the father. They both know you live alone by now.

- you notify your boss, and you almost pass out when they offer you nearly 4 months of maternity leave. they seem determined to treat you well. it helps that your ceo is also an omega.

- By about 12 weeks- you’re starting to show significantly enough that people on the train start to give you the priority seat when you were tight clothes. You show Enough that you begin to fiddle with your old phone again. You get close several times to turning it on-But in the end you never do. Preferring to leave it in the drawer of the nightstand next to your bed right next to the picture of them.

- “You can do this, there are plenty of single omega parents, it’s not like it used to be” the doctor and the clinic that you go too for your prenatal appointments assures you when the other omega finally asks if they’ res a father or another mother in the picture.

- And you’re not over what happened by any means but things slowly start to get better.

- You don’t cry randomly as much, you start coming home earlier and going on walks- the doctor said it was good for the baby. On the weekends you go to this fresh fruit market, sometimes with Irene and her wife and child, making a day out of it.

- And you enjoy the little child as he reaches up for your stomach, patting on it gently and slurring the words “baby out now!” that causes all of you to giggle and Irene’s wife apologizes- saying that their little Eun just loves babies more than anything.

- Your life is nice, calm. There is a tense atmosphere in your apartment, though you do buy a few plants, and a few poster pictures to put on the white walls. slowly the space starts to feel like yours. You paint the spare room the lightest shade of robins egg blue and add puffy white clouds to the walls with Yeri, giggling and laughing harder than you have in months as she accidentally splashes paint onto her face.

- Your relationship with a kind and soft beta named Taehyung starts simply and in the most cliché way possible.

- You accidentally ran into him while coming home from the grocery store, your belly barely showing through a baggy sweatshirt. Two paper bags in either arm. One of the bags rips when he bumps into you. his other coming up to stop you from falling backward, his arm like iron, his hands digging into you to steady you. all of a sudden your whole body flush with warmth.

- Tae is an absolute gentleman, picking up your weird assortment of food in his hands and walking the few blocks to your tiny apartment. you feel surprisingly safe with the stranger, your instincts have been in overdrive since your body started to adjust to your pregnancy, and they’re something about Tae’s scent that immediately settles your stomach.

It goes surprisingly well, there is something so gentlemanly about his deep voice and his quiet smile that makes you feel so relaxed. His beta scent- the smell of clean laundry (beta’s always smelled clean) definitely has something to do with it. not his pretty jaw or his delicate style.

- You invite him in for some iced tea and you spend a few minutes chatting, now that the bags not in front of your stomach, Tae can see why you seemed so unsteady on your feet. You expect it to scare him away- but he doesn’t mention you're obvious condition until he’s about to leave. Handing you a small slip of paper with his number on it.

- He touches your shoulder softly. “I live in the area so If you ever need any help- please don’t hesitate to call me.” by now he has scented the room, know by the lack of a competing scent as well as the lack of a bite on your shoulder that you’re alone. that you don't have anyone.

- You pin the number to the old fashion fridge and try to forget about it. After all, tae was more than a little flirty and you’re in no position to even want to date anyone right now. But when you finally call it’s more about needing help than wanting to see him. Though seeing him was an added bonus.

- He helps you move your refrigerator after an important document falls behind it, the literal social security card that you can't reach or get at. And he’s sweaty sipping more of your ice tea when he says, “I hoped that when you finally called me it would be for a date and not to rescue your medical stuff behind your dusty fridge.”

- “You don’t want to date me tae,” you say, your hand hovering over your stomach. He looks at your tummy too, sicking in his lower lip.

- “No I’m sure that I do” he says, taking your hand in his before he says softly, his warm brown eyes piercing into you as he looks through his black bangs “I don’t know what you’re dealing with, I don’t know who or what you’re running from, but trust me when I saw that I really, really want to take you out on a date- at least once.”

- You relent and agree to go visit a night market with him- one of the hallmarks of this city that you hadn’t yet indulged in.He buys you ice cream and fried mac and cheese and doesn’t criticize you when you dunk your French fries in your chocolate Sunday. In fact, he joins in- letting you dunk one in his Oreo mango ice cream.

- You listen to Tae talk about his job; you find out that he owns a pair of café’s the first one that he inherited from his grandmother, the second one that he opened last year after the first one did so well. Business is booming so much that he’s contemplating opening a third. the cafe is just between your apartment and your job, it’s no wonder that you never ran into him sooner.

- You promise to come to try his berry macaroons that are apparently the best in town. He starts to talk about coffee but then a glance down to your stomach reminds him that you can’t have that- and he switches to boba tea

- You sit in the warm summer air listening to a live band before you go to walk along the river, the lights reflecting off the water like one of van Goh's paintings. You’re laughing at some joke Tae tells you when he leans over surprisingly and kisses you, you recoiled a little, more surprised than displeased.

- “I’m sorry- you just looked so…. i’m sorry- I rushed you didn’t I, shit- y/n I’m so-”

- “I don’t know what you want from me Tae,” you say gesturing to your stomach, he starts to look abashed and ashamed, but then relents at your soft expression “but if we’re going to see each other like that, then you have to know that I miss them.” You say softly while looking out at the water, your hand hovering over your swollen stomach.

- “them?” he asks, looking surprised, you nod, “them.”

- “And I’m not going to stop missing them, probably for a long while. I think I always will. And if you’re ok with that- if you don’t mind-” Tae reaches up, running a hand across your face and you find yourself leaning into his touch, its been so long since anyone’s touched you with any affection. Your body is so hungry, so needy for it.

- “I don’t care who else is in your heart, I only want a place in It.” Tae says after a moment. Leaning his forehead against yours.

- You and tae start casually seeing each other, you stop by his coffee shop most days before work, it’s a street off from your company’s main building, and Tae always has a bag of coffee cake or a plate full of raspberry tarts for you, he pushes away your money with a lopsided grin the makes your heart beat rapidly. He even steps away during the busiest times to sit with you and just talk.

- Sometimes he plops your feet up on his lap and massages your swollen ankles, his smiles sweeter than the pastries, not taking no for an answer until you’ve tried every kind the café offers at least twice because he wants to know which are your favorite.

- One-night Taehyung finds your photo of all of them and your old cellphone in your dresser. And you're just trying to crack an egg into a pan when he comes out holding it. you almost drop the carton when he asks you who they are.

- He sits you down and you start breathing heavily and tells you that you don’t need to tell him- he sends a concerned look at your stomach, and that it doesn't matter if it's going to make you upset. you don't mean to have a panic attack but really, turning around and seeing your...your boyfriend holding the picture of your baby daddy just suprised you.

- tae looks like he honestly wants to know, So you launch into the story of your best friend who you’ve loved and will love until the day you die. Cradle to grave and all that.

- Fuck you miss jimin so much. You miss them all, Hoseok, yoongi and Namjoon. He laughs like Namjoon did when you tell him childhood stories of you and jimin and listens eagerly as you tell him about your college experience and trying to stay away.

- He’s a little quieter when he learns about the alpha’s that you love while you point at their faces in the picture and smile. He smiles a little though when you start listing off the things about them that you love. And he gets a little sadder when he realizes it will always be love- And not loved.

- your love for them hasn’t faded. not in all these months apart.

- He wishes you would move on from them. Wishes he was the only one who had ever made a home out of your heart. But he understands why you can’t- you’re carrying his child after all. The one with the gray hair in the photo, you tell him as much.

- he touches the photograph softly, “I understand why you miss them so much- it must have been so nice having so many people to love you and to love them back.”

- “it really was.”

- “I wish I was worth that” Taehyung says softly, his face downturned. You kiss away his worries, “you are tae- never think you’re not worth it- because you are.” he pulls you to him and kisses your forehead as his mind turns your words over in his head.

- maybe your words have a double meaning, maybe maybe, runs through his head. And he shakes off thoughts of other omega’s and directs his attention to you.

- “so are we going to eat dinner together or what? Should I call for takeout”

- But no matter where you go home too at night, no matter how good things are with Tae, you can’t help but think about Namjoon’s arms encircling your waist, about Yoongi’s quiet roll of his knuckles against your side in a silent hello.

- About Hoseok’s sweet kisses and how he would take your hand in his and drag you up from wherever you were sitting to slow dance with you around your kitchen when you were sad, and how it would eventually devolve into giggles and awkward butt wiggles.

- Nothing like how it was when you left when Hoseok would barely look at you- and if he did even look at you, it would only be with disdain and anger so severe that it would make you shake.

- But most of all you miss Jimin, the way he would hang on Namjoon’s thighs while gripping yours, how when he would laugh he would throw himself onto your shoulder to hide his closed-eyed smile in your skin. the way you’d smell so much like each other you could hardly distinguish your scents anymore.

- The first night you sleepover at Taehyung’s house you end up waking up in the middle of the night and reaching out for another set of arms.

- Taehyung wakes up too you wearing his silk robe and crying on his balcony, where you went to hide your sobs, he runs his hands up and down your arms while talking to you quietly, saying that you should come inside.

- That the cold is bad for the baby, and he’s right, you’re shaking like a leaf and your belly has grown so much in the past month. You’re nearly 5 months along- you’ve only known tae for a few months, but he already wants to tell you he loves you. He already loves you and the baby- it doesn’t matter that he’s not the father.

- But what you don’t know is that at that moment, Jimin is doing the same thing, crying on a balcony, feeling unable to go back inside as he looks out over the view that the two of you used to love. He remembers how you would drag the alphas out onto the balcony to eat dinner or play a game or just sitting, talking as you looked at the city.

- Because the apartment inside doesn’t feel like it used to- try as he might it doesn’t feel like home anymore, because you’re not there and everything is slowly falling apart- has been for months, and by now Jimin feels like he’s falling apart too.

- It feels like he’s been watching a train wreck in slow motion since you left.

------------------------------------

(once again! this series will never be finished! just fyi!)

#sandcastles #bts poly au #bts a/b/o #bts angst #sandcastles; snippets #Anonymous

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waywardmoeyy · 7 years

Text

My Guardian (Part 5)

Cas x Reader

Word Count: 1766

Warnings: kissing, angst, swearing, violence, mild gore, brief mention of sexual arousal.

**Sorry for the late night posts. It’s also when I write, so some of this may be weird. Anywhos, enjoy.

My Guardian Master List

“Sam and Dean will be back any minute,” Cas grumbled into your ear. He nuzzled his nose into your neck and nipped. You were actually sad that the brothers were coming home. The time you had spent alone with Cas had been wonderful. You had expressed to Cas that you wanted to keep everything that had gone on between the two of you a secret until you found Crowley.

No distractions.

Sure, Cas’s presence anywhere near you was now a distraction, but he was also a lot of help. The two of you had spent the morning drinking way too much coffee and planning your attack on Crowley’s new fortress. The boys had texted Cas pictures of the warding symbols that littered the house’s concrete barrier. You had come up with a few plans of how to take them down to allow Cas entrance.

The door at the bunker’s entrance opened and Dean’s hearty laugh filled the room. “Hey, look Sam, they really are still alive!” Dean stomped down the stairs and quickly made his way to you. You stood, gladly receiving a hug from the oldest Winchester. His muscular arms nearly knocked the wind out of you.

“Glad… to see you too, Dean,” you huffed.

He laughed again as he loosened his grip. “Shit, Y/N. That was a close one. Good thing we have a kickass guardian angel.” Dean’s voice was light.

Sam approached you and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you in for another suffocating hug. “Seriously. You look great!” he exclaimed in a chipper tone.

“Almost gone,” you chuckled as you lifted your shirt a little. The once huge gash across your abdomen was almost completely closed. There was no need for a bandage anymore. You beamed over at Cas. “He did good.”

Cas’s cheeks flushed. “I’ve found a few ways for you to destroy the warding around the compound,” he said trying to change the subject. “There seems to be a large tree lining this side of the fence,” he pointed to one of the photos you had printed out. “I think Y/N is small and nimble enough to climb it, get onto the fence, and make a small mark on some of the lines. We only need to destroy a few to weaken the warding enough.”

Dean listened, nodding at Castiel’s explanations.

But you didn’t hear much. You just stood there, staring at Castiel. He wasn’t very involved in the effort to take down Crowley until now, which made your heart flutter. He was doing all of this for you, to help you seek revenge, and to probably seek revenge for himself.

“Okay, everyone pack up! We leave in an hour!” Dean shouted, waking you from your little daydream.

You nodded at Dean to make it seem like you were paying attention, then scurried off to your room to pack.

Sam and Cas stood around the large table as Dean and you went off down the hall. Sam crossed his arms, watching Cas’s eyes follow you.

“So, did you tell her?” Sam asked the angel, nudging Cas with his elbow.

Cas cleared his throat. “Well, not exactly.” His answer was curt.

Sam rolled his eyes. “Okay, Mr. Mysterious. I’m just glad the two of you are able to work together and you are getting involved. It will mean a lot to her.” Sam sighed, “C’mon.”

Cas nodded and made his way to the door.

Cas was quiet for most the trip to the creepy mansion, but his hands were restless. He fumbled with them in his lap before reaching over the space between you and ran his finger over your thigh. You didn’t look at him, but your rosy, heated cheeks said it all. You could feel your arousal in your core, causing you to squeeze your legs together. You gaze flicked over to him. His glassy blue eyes met your gaze, making your chest throb.

“We’re almost there, guys. Be ready,” Dean commanded, snapping you out of your trance yet again.

The immense ivory walls glared back at you as you stared out the car window. They were the one thing between Crowley and your secret weapon. All you needed was to get rid of the warding.

Dean pulled up to the spot where you had all decided to let you get out. You leapt out of the Impala and sprinted for the tree you had seen in the photo. Your stomach twisted and turned with both excitement and nerves. If this didn’t work, Crowley could find you and finish you off for good.

You hoisted yourself onto the lowest branch and peered around. It was odd that no demons were out guarding the walls, but Crowley didn’t always have security like the Pentagon.

Making your way up from branch to branch, you spotted the boys and Cas in the distance. Cas was facing you, probably keeping tabs as you made your way up to the top. When you finally reached the top of the wall, you hooked your ankles around a branch and dangled over the other side.

Hoping no demons were looking out a window, you shook the small bottle of spray paint and made a line across the symbol. You did the same for the few others that were in your reach, hoping that would do the trick.

The plantation house felt like it was staring at you. You could feel Crowley’s presence, his power, sending an anxious chill through your body. That son of a bitch was going to get what he deserved.

Once you made your way down the tree, you hustled over to the boys. Mud squished under your combat boots. Cas shot up from the trunk of the Impala and approached you. You pulled your sleeves over your hands, not able to tell whether it was the cold night air or Cas who gave you the chills.

“I think I got enough of them,” you huffed.

“Great, let’s go. Cas, do your thing.” Dean grunted as he turned to towards the back of the house.

Cas grabbed your shoulder as you spun towards the house. He turned your so your faces were inches from each other. Sam raised his eyebrow to the interaction.

“Be safe, Y/N. Please,” Cas whispered.

You nodded, putting your hand on his. “You too.”

Dean hoisted you back into the tree, then followed suit. You secretly hoped the tree was strong enough all three of you, especially since both Sam and Dean were much larger than you. It was the only way onto and over the wall without going through the front entrance, like the badasses of some action movie. Not exactly the element of surprise.

Once you and the brothers had reached the muddy ground on the other side, you made a break for the nearest way into the house. You followed Sam as he ran from tree to tree, the trunks barely hiding his massive form. The house was dark, except for a few lanterns near the front door. One window on the second floor emitted a dim, flickering light. Crowley.

“There.” You pointed up to the small window towards the rear of the house. “He must be in there. I don’t think houses this old have basements.”

Dean and Sam both nodded. “There must be a back door,” Sam whispered. He turned to the house.

A loud male scream erupted from the house. The volume was overwhelming, not human.

Angel.

You made a break for the front door, not caring who or what tried to get in your way. You heard Dean and Sam shout behind you as the plan shattered into a million pieces. Like you.

You scurried up the stone steps and busted through the dark wooden doors. You were greeted by a large foyer, complete with white marble floors and a curved grand staircase. Another scream, this one even louder, filled your ears. You bolted up the posh, red carpeted stairs with your muddy boots.

“Cas,” you whimpered, your heart pounding in your ears. Shit. Bringing him along was a bad idea. Sure, he was a brute force against demons, but if he was hurt he was useless.

At the top of the staircase, there was a long hall littered with a half a dozen doors. You paused, taking in a breath. Where were all of Crowley’s guards? The hall was empty.

You jumped as you heard a loud bang, followed by the shouts of Dean and Sam. “I guess they found the back door,” you muttered to yourself. You pressed forward, determined to find the Scottish son of a bitch and snap his pompous little neck.

You reached the last door on the right and paused. The same flickering light you saw outside poked out from under the door. You kicked the door open as you heard the boys stomping up the stairs.

“Oh, darling, that’s no way to treat a vintage house like this,” the King of Hell reprimanded as he turned to you. Your vision was fixed on the hostage chained to a chair in front of him.

“Cas.” Your stomach flipped, almost making you vomit on the antique rug. You didn’t react to Sam and Dean as they blasted past you.

“Crowley, you son of a bitch!” Dean screeched as he lunged for one of Crowley’s minions.

“Oh, Dean, enough with the angst. Now, Y/N, I believe I have something you want. Something you treasure.” Crowley chuckled. “And this time, I won’t let him or you live.” Crowley took Cas’s angel blade and carved into the angel’s bare chest. Cas let out a guttural scream as blood dribbled down his stomach.

The angel’s eyes met yours, “Y/N, go. Go!” he grunted, gritting his teeth.

You stood there as Dean and Sam fought off the last of Crowley’s goons beside you. Your gaze stayed fixed on Cas. He had several large cuts on his chest, neck, and face.

“Yes my dear, go. But you won’t be running for long,” Crowley mocked.

Dean rushed at Crowley. With a flick of the King’s wrist, Dean hit the wall hard. Sam stood beside you, breathing heavily.

“Me for him,” you mumbled. Sam’s gaze snapped to you. Dean shuffled up from the ground, grasping his arm.

Crowley grinned. “I’m sorry, love. I didn’t catch that.”

You clinched your fists at your side. “I said, me for him.”

Dean furrowed his brow. “What?” Sam breathed, almost as confused.

Crowley took a step back from Cas, lowering the angel blade. He raised an eyebrow as he smirked even wider. “Now that’s an idea.”

Tag List:

@pizzarollpatrol

#castiel #cas x reader #castiel x reader #cas #crowley #dean #dean winchester #sam winchester #supernatural

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justanotherwaywarddaughter · 7 years

Text

Spread the Word Around– the Girl’s Back in Town

Title: Spread the Word Around– the Girl’s Back in Town (please tell me someone caught my Thin Lizzy reference here)

Characters: Cas x Sister!Reader, Sam, Dean

Summary: Based on this imagine. Sam and Dean have a half-sister who was recently resurrected from hell. Cas makes some introductions, and the ragtag team sets off to waste some sirens. (I suck at summaries. Sorry.)

Word Count: 5101 (I got a little carried away...)

Warnings: Sassy reader. Flashback from hell (Just one and not really graphic). Dean tries to be a hero. Cas is generally confused. Pretty much the same crap that always happens. A little cheesy at the end. Sorry. Just whip out the crackers and deal with it.

A/N: Very first attempt at a fic, so be gentle. Italics are reader’s thoughts. Hope you enjoy! Feedback is always appreciated.

Tags: @manawhaat @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @notnaturalanahi @bkwrm523 @whispersandwhiskerburn @roxydavenport @impala-dreamer @deathtonormalcy56 @samsgoddess @wildfirewinchester @for-the-love-of-dean @cici0507 @fiveleaf @deansleather @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname @mrswhozeewhatsis @kayteonline @idreamofhazel @ilovedean-spn2 @babypieandwhiskey @wi-deangirl77 @deantbh @sinceriouslyamellpadalecki @deanwinchesterforpromqueen @chaos-and-the-calm67 @memariana91 @teamfreewill-imagine @chelsea-winchester @fandommaniacx @writingbeautifulmen @revwinchester @your-average-distracted-waffle @drarina1737 @lucibae-is-dancing-in-hell @castieltrash1 @supernaturalyobessed @mysaintsasinner @ohwritever @ruined-by-destiel @winchester-writes @deals-with-demons @maraisabellegrey @faith-in-dean

Dammit, I am too old for this! you thought as you realized where you were. The makeshift coffin you had been buried in was well on its way to full decomposition. Getting out shouldn’t be a problem.

Doing a quick survey of yourself, you made a quick mental note to thank whoever had made the decision to bury you in your combat boots rather than some flimsy dress shoes. With a couple of well-placed kicks, the bottom half of the coffin gave way, allowing you to wriggle out of the opening you made. The soil was deliciously cool against your feverish skin as you clawed your way from the shallow grave and exposed yourself to the fresh air on the surface above.

That’s a change, you thought to yourself. The last time you had breathed clean air was right before–no. You refused to think of it. You knew what you were getting into when you made the deal. You were a hunter. You knew the risks, the hazards of the job. You’d heard the stories. The only way you were gonna get out of this with your sanity was to refuse to let it consume you. To lock hell in a cage and never let it out.

You snorted a little at your own joke, morbid as it may be, and decided it was time for a shower and a plan–in that order. You brushed what dirt you could off and shook your head to rid your hair of the dust. Flipping your locks back into place, you started what would be a long trek back to civilization.

Who thought it was a good plan to bury me in a secluded forest 30 miles from nowhere? Okay, maybe thirty miles is a bit of an exaggeration, but come on, people. Make it easier on a girl, would ya? Granted, they probably hadn’t expected you to come back to life. Wait- why didn’t they burn me? I mean, I’m not complaining, but-

Your thoughts were cut short as you neared the edge of the woods and caught a glimpse of a two-lane road peeking from between the trees as the headlights of cars passing through illuminated the night. A quick glance at a road sign put you about ten miles out of the nearest town–somewhere called Hotchkiss, Colorado. What a name, you thought to yourself. “Here I go again on my own…” you grumbled to no one in particular, humming the tune of White Snake as you made your way into town.

By the time you were strolling down Main Street of Small Town, U.S.A.–apparently better known as Hotchkiss–it was near dawn.

You trudged on toward a hole-in-the-wall bar that looked dodgy, even for your tastes. You’d have probably been nervous had you not just woken up from the dead. Being resurrected apparently has that effect on people.

You made your way through the door, eyeing the seedy bartender on your way to the back where you saw a blaring pink neon sign that you were pretty sure was supposed to say “restroom” instead of “estr m.” Nudging the door open with the toe of your boot, you scanned the interior and walked in. Not bad as far as a bar bathroom goes.

Oh, but the day is young, you thought to yourself as you marveled at the lack of vomit. You hazarded a glance in the mirror and, to your relief, you didn’t actually look all that bad. Wetting a paper towel from the rusty dispenser, you set to work cleaning the remaining dirt from your face. You carefully slid your leather jacket—yeah, definitely need to thank whoever chose these clothes—down your shoulders and scrubbed the dirt off your arms.

Why the hell is my shoulder so itchy? If it’s a hell-bug I might just scream, you thought as you gingerly peeled the sleeve of your black t-shirt up.

At least it’s not a hell-bug, you thought as you took in the sight of the angry, red, raised hand print that wrapped around your upper arm. You winced as you thought of what could have left such a mark.

Time to hustle some fool and get out of dodge. If I can get a room at that place off the highway, I can at least demon proof the thing. That ought to buy me some time to figure things out a little, you thought as you realized you still had no idea who or, probably more accurately, what pulled you from the pit or why whatever it was would do something like that. You were quickly becoming more uneasy as you found yourself reverting back to the tendencies you had before— stop it right there.

You made quick work of hustling the poor soul at the pool table, fluttering your eyelashes at him and giving him a wink before sauntering out of the dimly lit bar into the bright sunlight of the new day. Wonder if I’ll ever get used to seeing that again, you thought.

Continuing your way down the road you saw a motel that looked like your kind of place—the kind of place where no one would bother you, so long as you kept to yourself. Instead of going straight there—because who checks into a motel, besides hunters or troublemakers, without bags or belongings?—you made your way to the convenience store across the street. You selected a few items: a toothbrush, some toothpaste, soap, a change of clothes, salt (of course), and a few random food items you happened to see on your way to the register. You gave the cashier a friendly smile as you pulled out a few crumpled bills to pay for your things and left.

Arriving back at the motel, you realized you didn’t have any ID. Okay, so I guess it’s time to lay on the charm thick and hope he forgets to ask… you think as you sashay—there is no better way to describe your walk— up to the counter and put your money down.

Seeing the dumbstruck look on the proprietor’s face–Poor guy; doesn’t take much to get him all flustered–you reach over and grab a key. Room…you look down at the tag on the key 13. How ironic. Home sweet home for now.

As you pushed the key into the lock, you sensed rather than saw whatever the hell it was that just happened to pop up behind you this time.

Just beautiful. Aaaaaaabsolutely wonderful. This is EXACTLY what I needed. So done.

You whirled around to see a man standing there. As you sized him up, he did the same to you, cocking his head to the side and peering at you in a way that made you almost believe he could see your soul.

Jeez. Creep.

“I am not a creep. I am Castiel, angel of the Lord,” he said in his gravelly voice.

Okay, I know I didn’t say that out loud.

“Your inner monologue is quite interesting,” Castiel responded.

“Alright, Professor X, enough with the mind games. Who are you for real, and why are you he-“ Your sentence was cut short as he grabbed your arm.

When you looked up and began to protest, you noticed that your surroundings had changed. Instead of some grungy motel, you saw two guys sitting at a massive table, books spread out all around them.

We are not in Kansas anymore.

“Actually, we are in Kansas,” Castiel informed you.

As you turned to tell him to stay out of your head if he valued his life, the sound of his voice caused the two men to look up, the shorter one grabbing a flask of what you could only assume was holy water and slinging it at you. Wiping your eyes, you gave him what your father had dubbed the bitch face. “Not a demon, you douchebag.”

Those eyes. You knew those eyes. “Dean?” you all but whispered. He stared at you without a touch of recognition, which you expected. “God, you must be Sammy then. What did they feed you, kid?”

Dean ran a hand over his face, “Alright, I’ll bite. Who are you and how do you know us?”

“I’ll tell you the truth, but you won’t like it,” you responded matter-of-factly.

“Out with it,” he grumbled.

“Why yes, I would like to have a seat. How gracious of you. It is a long trek back from hell. No, no I’m fine. Just peachy. Don’t need a breather,” you retorted, every word dripping with sarcasm. “I’m Y/N, and I’m your sister–well, half-sister. Daddy dearest was apparently more suave than we know. My mom was a hunter, and from what I understand, it was a one-time thing. Just before he married your mom. Sowing his wild oats, I guess. Ironic, isn’t it? John Winchester with two hunters before he even knew that the things that go bump in the night are actually real. Talk about having a type.”

You unceremoniously plopped down in an armchair as the brothers—your brothers—looked at you in disbelief.

“So, you just show up after thirty-some odd years, and expect us to believe you? Why now?” Sam asked, furrowing his brow and carding his hand through his surprisingly long hair.

“Well, angel boy is the one who brought me here. I guess we should all direct our questions at him,” you said with an air of annoyance.

Castiel, looking as sheepish as a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar, nodded, affirming your story. “She is telling the truth. I found she had been raised from perdition. I assume it was one of my brothers, judging by the scar on her upper arm that is strikingly similar to yours, Dean. I took it upon myself to instigate a family reunion. Was that not good?”

A little warning would have been nice. Or— hey, here’s a thought—maybe a little explanation. Recent Hell escapee over here confused as a chameleon in a bag of Skittles. Your thoughts took a pause as you saw Castiel look to you and tilt his head as if trying to decipher what you meant.

“And that’s another thing! Stay out of my head, angel boy,” you said as you realized what was going on. Turning to the boys, you asked, “Does he do this to everyone?” Your only reply was a nod from the eldest of your brothers as they both returned their attention to their resident angel.

Between the boys’ questions and your own, your “conversation” was beginning to resemble an interrogation. This is getting us nowhere.

“Alright, alright. Angel boy here doesn’t seem to know any more than we do. This isn’t helping. You can’t draw blood from a stone. I’m up and at ‘em now. Let’s not look a gift horse in the mouth,” you said, moving from your chair to peer over Sam’s shoulder, leaving a very puzzled Cas to wonder who would ever attempt to draw blood from a stone or would feel the need to inspect a horse’s mouth.

“Looks like you all were working on a case before I got here. Wanna fill me in?” you asked. Please don’t be a wendigo. Please don’t be a wendigo. You hazarded a look at your brothers and saw them looking at each other, Dean with a hardened expression and Sam silently pleading with him to give you a shot– at least that’s what you assumed from his puppy dog face.

Nice, kid. I wasn’t around to teach you that one. Seems to be working, though. Always works for me. Dean is definitely a sucker for it. I’ll tuck that little tidbit of information away for later. May be useful.

Your mental ramblings came to a halt when your brothers turned their gazes on you. You smiled at their scrutiny.

“Tell me. Don’t tell me. I don’t care. I’m just glad to be back topside. Thought I might offer you boys a hand since I’m here.” You began to move around the room noticing the piles of books and scrolls and articles and journals… books and journals and lore, oh my! As you started scanning the scribbles in the notebook that laid open on the table, you groaned. Looking at the map that was spread out at the end of the table, you felt dread creep its way in, curling its way up your spine and settling at the base of your neck.

And now I have a headache.

“I freaking hate sirens. First case back from the dead and it has to be a damn siren,” you grumbled. Your muttered complaint caught your brothers’ attention.

“Just like that? How do you know that thing is a siren?” Dean questioned.

“Well, Einstein, there’s no obvious connection among the victims. None of these guys have anything in common. Different builds, different backgrounds, different ages. That told me to look a little deeper. I was scanning the vics’ patterns of movement thanks to this handy dandy map you all put together– nice touch, by the way– when I noticed that their paths seemed to converge in the same general area, but not the exact same place. Our first commonality. After skimming what I’m assuming is Sammy’s chicken scratch in the notebook, I saw that every guy you talked to was ‘seeing someone special’, whether he called her a girlfriend or whether she was a mistress or whatever. In not so many words, every guy called this girl perfect. I bet you a dollar to a doughnut that if we go back and question all the vics again, they’d say she was the perfect woman. Our second commonality. That led me to siren. All we’re looking for now is means of infection,” you finished, moving to reclaim your armchair.

“And you got all that from two minutes of scanning some notes?” Sam questioned.

“Call it a gift. Some people sing. Some people dance. Some people paint. I think,” you replied with a grin.

“She’s telling the truth. She’s a very loud thinker,” Castiel supplied.

Gee, thanks. I’ll try to quieten down. You turned to look at Dean, who was scowling down at Sammy’s notebook. Oh, ye of little faith. Cas’s gaze flicked over to you, and his mouth quirked into a half smile at your last thought. Understood that reference, did you?

“Look, fellas, we all know I’m right, so let’s either waste this thing together, or you can show me the door, and I’ll take care of it myself,” you said, moving from the armchair to once again inspect the dust covered volumes that filled the shelves. You peered over your shoulder, seeing your brothers having some kind of silent conversation, and thought it best not to interrupt. You continued to peruse the shelves.

I wonder how many years of work went into this. I wonder how many centuries it took to compile all this knowledge in one place. How old is Cas? I bet he has tons of literature stored in that head of his. Wonder if they have anything just for fun. What do the boys do for fun? The last thing I remember seeing them do for fun was play with little green men. Catching Cas’s signature confused-squint-head-turn, you answered him aloud, “Army men. Little plastic guys, Cas. Not literally little green men,” snapping the boys out of whatever other world they entered for their unspoken conversations.

After a stern look from Sam and a well-placed jab from a bony elbow, Dean grumbled, “I guess we could use an extra set of hands.”

“Thanks for the enthusiastic welcome to the team,” your said, your penchant for sarcasm once again rearing its head, “Glad to be here.” Rolling your eyes, you moved back toward Sam’s scrawled notes. “I’ve never seen a single siren with this many hits.”

“Pairs or even trios aren’t unheard of. That’s probably what we’re dealing with, which would explain why the locations we have are close together but not the same,” Sam supplied.

“I don’t care how many of these things there are. We are going now. The local law enforcement is looking for a serial killer, and I’m not about to sit around and give them another victim to add to their profile. Let’s go,” Dean said, grabbing his keys and heading to what you assumed was the door.

Yes, let’s go in blind, not knowing who is who or what is what.

“Dean, you need the last vic’s blood. Do you happen to have some or should we plan on a pit stop?” you asked, your voice thick with sarcasm.

“I’ve got it covered. Get in the car,” he replied, tossing his keys in the air and catching them as he slid in the classic Chevy.

This is not going to end well. Cas, are you still listening? Where’d you go? Let the record show that I totally called it when this hunt goes down the crapper.

The engine thundered to life and you and your motley crew, another Motley Crue if you will, started the four-hour drive toward an abandoned shirt factory where you’d hopefully find some sirens. Hoping for sirens. What has my world come to?

“Now, listen up, boys, I’m only going to say this once.” Invoking your best mom voice, you continued, “Against my better judgement, we’re going in blind here. We’re not even sure they’ll be in the same place. Stay close. Don’t wander off. Don’t try to play the hero–I’m looking at you, Dean. Don’t be a damsel in distress that needs saving, either. Don’t touch anything. We don’t know what bodily fluids could’ve ended up where. Work quickly, quietly, and efficiently. We are Seal Team 6 on this one, guys. No need to be loud or go in guns blazing. Got it?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Dean said with a mock salute and a smirk in his rearview mirror.

Someone isn’t used to being the little brother, are they?

You gave him your best stern I-mean-what-I-said face, and turned your head to look out the window, watching water droplets form on the windows and race down, dragging the dust with them as it began to rain. You sensed someone behind you, and before it registered with you that it was probably just Cas, you swung an elbow back to meet whatever idiot surprised you, hearing the sickening crunch of bone on bone. Looking around, you saw Cas holding his nose and doing the head-tilt-what-just-happened look that had become an almost permanent expression since you came into the picture.

“That was not a pleasant feeling. Why did you strike me? Have I angered you in some way?” he questioned as his fingers exuded a faint blue light while he healed his nose.

“No, Cas. I’m sorry. Instinct kicks in sometimes, you know? Well, I guess you don’t know. Maybe a little warning next time? I did just get back from hell, dude. I’m a little on edge here. Although, I guess we’re even now. That’ll teach you to snoop in my head,” you finished with a chuckle. Upon seeing his confused expression once again, you said, “Kidding, Cas. Only kidding. Relax.”

The rest of the drive was silent, save for the soft sounds of Dean’s cassettes and Sam’s muttered complaints when he disapproved of a song or his research–double checking you again, tying up loose ends, trying to eliminate a few surprises here and there– hit a snag.

This silence is driving me up the wall. I am literally going insane. At least hell is still locked in a box for now. Guess that’s a good sign. You shivered involuntarily at the thought of something escaping the cage you’d so forcefully constructed.

“FINALLY!” you all but sang, jumping out of the car as Dean parked a “safe distance” from the action. Man, he is a few fuses short of a full circuit when it comes to that thing. Obsessive much? “Remember what I said, boys. In. Out. Clean. Quick. Please, please, please at least check the girl’s face in a mirror before you stab her. And, for the love of all that is good and holy in this world, DO NOT touch anything unless it’s your weapon. Got me?” you turned, seeing heads nodding. “Good. Let’s get this over with.”

The four of you tried to appear nonchalant as you neared the entrance of the old factory, which was situated in a no longer operational industrial district of a small town. At least the sidewalks aren’t busy. No one to hide from. This place is giving me the creeps. Why do monsters always pick the most clichéd hiding places? Abandoned factories, abandoned warehouses, the list goes on. Like, have some creativity. Why can’t we ever visit a nice coffee shop or a cozy little bed and breakfast? You shook your head, urging yourself to focus as Sam expertly picked the lock and the ancient steel door creaked its way open.

Dean stomped his way inside, ignoring your request (okay, so maybe it was more of a command) for finesse. Man, this place is in bad shape. You worried your bottom lip in between your teeth as you entered the building and were engulfed in humidity. The hairs on your arms stood on end as the heat intensified when you began moving further from the door. The only lighting was provided by a busted bulb dangling from the crumbling ceiling. The shadows were endless, giving an eerie quality to the already decrepit building. You tugged at your shirt collar as you began to sweat. Your feet scuffled along the dirty floor as you and the boys, by tacit agreement, split up. The constant drip, drip, drip of some leak nearby combined with your quickened breathing to form a melody all too familiar. Suddenly, you weren’t in the abandoned factory. You were strapped to your usual table, watching in horror as a familiar face approached you dragging a gleaming silver tool chest behind him, his lips curled into a crooked grin as he took in your terror. The smell of blood and burning filled your nostrils. No. You let out a strangled cry and shut your eyes, bracing for what you knew was to come, but instead of cold metal, you felt a warm hand on your shoulder, roughly shaking you.

Sam’s voice permeated your consciousness, “Y/N! Y/N! Snap out of it! It’s not real!”

You cautiously opened your eyes, realizing you’d dropped to the ground at some point. You were met with Sam’s understanding gaze as he offered you a hand up.

Damn, I wasn’t this dirty when I crawled out of my grave. “Thanks,” you murmured, clearing your throat.

“No problem. Happens to the best of us,” he quipped, flashing his dimples.

As the sounds of a quiet conversation turned to shoes scuffling and fists connecting with flesh, you both took off toward where the racket was coming from. You ran ahead of Sam, finding Dean struggling against what you assumed was the siren.

“Come on now, sweetheart. It doesn’t have to be this way. We were having such a good time,” he cooed, going at her with the dagger again.

“Pity I’ll have to kill you. You’re so pretty,” she said in reply, lunging at him, effectively making his dagger clatter to the ground. He stood in front of her with his hands raised

Do I have to do everything myself? Making sure to employ the caution you had pleaded with the boys to have, you made your way toward the siren, whose back was to you, motioning for Sam to stay back. You nodded at Dean, urging him to keep her distracted as you raised your dagger. So close… Come on, Dean. I just need one more sarcastic comment– a few more inches. You grinned and made your final move toward the monster, plunging your dagger into her back. One down, you thought, shooting Dean your bitch face as you cleaned your dagger on your denim clad thigh, your hands shaking from the combined adrenaline of your attack and your flashback.

“I need to dip this again. What was that I was saying about not being a damsel in distress, Dean?” you asked, moving toward your oldest brother, checking for injuries.

“Hey, I am the hero. Not the damsel in distress, dammit!” he bit back.

“Doesn’t look like it to me,” you said, motioning to the body on the floor with your free hand. “There’s no way this is the only one. Where did Cas go?”

You all turned as you heard voices coming from the end of a long hallway. Wearily, you made your way toward the door, this time allowing Sam to take the lead. One a day is my quota on saving the asses of grown men.

You stopped short as the you heard the voice again, causing Dean to bump into your back.

“Hey! Earth to Y/N. Generally, when you’re trying to figure out what makes a noise, you move toward it,” he said, rolling his eyes.

“Someone is obviously not happy I had to step in. Get over yourself, stop with your little attitude fit, and listen to that voice. It sounds like me,” you said, your curiosity outweighing your confusion as you moved toward whoever was talking, stopping in your tracks yet again when you saw the scene in front of you.

Can this day get any weirder? I mean, come on. Give me a break here. I’m pulled from hell by God knows who, kidnapped by an angel, introduced to my brothers who had no idea I existed, sucked into a hunt, and now some siren bitch has stolen my face. Can sirens even do that? Literally, so done right now.

Do I really look like that? You thought as “you” approached Cas, reaching to straighten his tie while purring something at the angel, who reddened. Cas hesitantly reached down to cup “your” cheek, and you cleared your throat. “Excuse me, miss. You look familiar. Have we met before?” Taking in her surprised expression you chuckled, “Oh, what I wouldn’t give for a camera right now. You should see your face. Oh, yeah. You decided to borrow mine. Let me just show you real quick,” you snapped. Cas backed away from the fake you, edging his way back toward the door.

The fight that ensued was quick, though confusing. God, this has been a freaky day. I can honestly say I never thought I’d be punching myself in the face. At least she didn’t think to take advantage of the fact that she had an angel at her disposal. This could’ve gotten a lot messier. I freaking told him not to touch anything. What does he do? He comes in here and gets infected. I’ll have to go over it with him and see what part of “DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING!!!” wasn’t clear to him. He’s a freaking celestial being. You’d think that would lend him a little extra clarity. A solid right hook had the siren down for the count. You pinned her to the floor and turned to look at your brothers and their resident angel. “Can I get a little help here? This dagger won’t do much good since apparently Cas thought it would be fun to have a play date with a siren,” you yelled over your shoulder.

Sam looked to Cas apologetically before taking out his dagger and slicing the angel’s arm with it. He waked over to you and pulled out a mirror. “Just to be sure,” he said with a grin. Satisfied that you weren’t some ancient sea bitch, he offered you the dagger and said, “I think it’s only fair that you do the honors.”

I like him, you thought as you quickly killed the siren. No point in dragging it out, although I will say stabbing myself is an odd experience. You stood up, wiping your hands on your jeans careful to avoid the drying blood of the other siren, and spun around to face your boys. “Can we go now? I’m starving.”

Sam chuckled, jogging to catch up with you. You two walked side by side toward the door, Dean and Cas following.

“Wait, wait, wait. Are we not even going to talk about how Cas’s deepest desire in a woman is you? This is too good to pass up,” Dean asked, elbowing the flushed angel in the ribs.

“We’ll talk about the Cas thing after we get done making fun of you for playing the hero like Y/N told you not to and almost getting your ass handed to you,” Sam replied with a smirk.

“Hey! I had that handled! I would’ve been okay!” Dean insisted, pointing his finger at Sam.

“Boys, boys. Relax. There’s plenty of time for this crap in the car. I’m serious. I’m tired and hungry. If you don’t feed me soon, the sirens will seem like a walk in the park compared to me,” you said, once again trying to shoo them toward the door. Soon after walking outside, you caught Cas by the sleeve and pulled him toward you, straightening his tie like the siren did. “So I’m the girl of your dreams, huh? We’ll talk later,” you said with a wink, standing on your toes to place a kiss on his cheek.

“But I do not dream. I am not sure I understand what you mean. I am, however, looking forward to later, whenever that is. I am eager to share with you what I’ve learned from the pizza man,” the angel said with a small smile, taking his leave.

With a confused scrunch of your nose and a giggle, you made your way to the Impala, sliding in the back seat. I guess this turned out to be a pretty good day after all. “Hey, guys, Cas mentioned something about showing me something he learned from a pizza man. What on God’s green earth does he mean? Is that like angel code for something?” you asked after your brothers had slammed their doors.

Both of them groaned loudly. “Our lives have become a bad Lifetime movie. No– it’s worse than that. Our lives are becoming a soap opera. Our best friend is falling for our long lost sister, who recently came back to life. I’m not sure I can take it,” Dean said, running a hand roughly through his hair. Sammy just smiled and shook his head.

You leaned up to poke your head between the seats and grinned. Oh, yeah. This definitely turned out to be a good day.

Part 2

#spn fanfic #spn family #spnfanficpond #guppy fic #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel x reader #sister reader #guppy writes

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