#I needed to document this somewhere bc who knows maybe they mean something lol

[romanticatheartt]

*tiny HOFAS spoiler*

So while reading the book I came across these two paragraphs:

chapter 13 ^

chapter 81 ^

And they oddly reminded me of Feyre...

I'm not saying it means anything because I'm no theorist lol but while reading these, only Feyre came to my mind.

Cthona holding an infant while her other hand hold an orb which represents Midgard and in ACOWAR we have Feyre fixing the Cauldron which we learn it's kill switch for Prythian (even tho we knew that but now there's a story behind it) so she -and Rhys- literally saved their whole planet. In another word its holding up because of their power...

Urd holding a black metal bowl in her hands and symbols are carved all over it. Cauldron also have patterns swirl on it. Those symbols runs all over Urd's body and we have Feyre having tattoos on her arms and in ACOTAR we've seen her body being painted in patterns.

ACOTAR -> chapter 13:

ACOWAR -> chapter 76:

Now we know Feyre had their entire *world* into the palm of her hand and not universe because back then we didn't know other worlds exist as well. But again this looks like Cthona, birther of worlds, holding the Orb in one of her hands, the other holding a baby and Urd, Goddess/Fate/Mother, holding a bowl in her hands...

idk what all this means, maybe Sarah only like the aesthetic. And I think it's so far fetched to say Feyre is a goddess (or semi-goddess?)... but it's all very interesting :)

cr: paintfaery on Instagram

#my very first post #🥹 #and what better way to start? #feyre darling #english is not my first language #so forgive any grammar mistakes #idk if anyone has already pointed this out #I don't check what's going on in Feyre's tag but I know there's too much negativity for my liking #about her and other characters #and I'm not here for that... #pls don't make this about ship-war! #feyre archeron #feyre cursebreaker #high lady feyre #pro feyre #feysand #hofas spoilers #hofas #I needed to document this somewhere bc who knows maybe they mean something lol

[jakowskis]

i know we're all frustrated with the limited lore we have regarding the four lords but i wanted to put some questions out there in hopes someone has the answers. if not ig we can just speculate, & maybe the answers will crop up via word of the writers eventually or smth

first off, heisenberg's wiki page currently states smth about him being kidnapped as a child. i know there's a lot of talk about "forced to be her children", but is anything canonically mentioned regarding miranda kidnapping the lords, especially with them as minors? either from the village or from elsewhere, considering their diverse last names?

even if something along those lines happened with heisenberg, that just brings up a dozen more questions. like, we know alcina was 44 yrs old when miranda got a hold of her. i don't quite understand how the whole eva-reincarnation thing was intended to work, but apparently the potential "vessels" didn't need to be young girls. lady d's wiki makes it sound like she inherited her family's castle in her 40s (in the 1950s) where she met miranda, was enchanted by her, and willingly allowed herself to be altered by the cadou.

i know there's some (undated) documents you find in the game where someone discusses how miranda took donna in, & i think she's described as a young woman, so that means she was an teen or adult when she was infected, too. presumably an adult, if her aging stopped when she made contact with the cadou like alcina & miranda. i'd consider a theory that she's actually just younger than the others, but everything in her home indicates shes from the 20th century, too. all the lords have an old-fashionedness to them, but alcina's the only one who's time period is confirmed. donna kinda reminds me of the 1920s, actually.

moreau... everything about his dialogue implies childishness. it'd be a solid bet that, if the child kidnapping concept is true, he was a fellow victim. the thing that's throwing me off... he has a tattoo. a sailor tattoo. maybe, before things went crazy, even under miranda's influence and with the mutation, he was able to be semi-normal and even travel and go somewhere modern enough to give tattoos, but i'm inclined to think it's a relic of a past life. also worth mentioning he seems to be somewhat older, as he has gray hair... did he not stop aging as the women have, or was he, again, influenced by miranda as an adult?

karl's in a similar boat with his age, but there's that damn wiki sentence that's throwing me off - kidnapped as a child. was the cadou introduced to his body when he was a boy? did miranda really try her often-lethal experiments on children? has he aged normally, then? we'll guess he's late 40s - was he born in the early 70s, and he really is alcina's little brother? and was he the only one of the lords subjected to that specific hell? taken and experimented on as a child, whereas the other three were willing adults?

despite my confusion over the origin of the kidnapped child concept, this theory does make sense. it especially explains his hatred towards her.

but it also opens up another can of worms. now im thinkin... how awfully convenient that there were four notable families in the area who's most recent descendants happened to be able to semi-successfully bond with the cadou. it makes me wonder.. aside from alcina, and maybe donna as well (namely bc of the gravestone by her home), did the lords actually hail from the families they represent? is it possible miranda gifted moreau and heisenberg the last names of long-gone families who'd once been prevalent in their region, along with the reservoir and factory, respectively, both families had once presided over?

either way, whether descended from locals or outsiders brought in - where are their families? donna's parents are dead, okay... how about the rest of them? surely all four of them don't have absolutely no family at all. which, in line with what i just talked about... is it possible heisenberg was taken from his family as a kid? i doubt miranda would have the decency to exclusively seek out orphans.

then there's his line about "she took me. took us." (which also lends to the concept of him being a child when he got dragged into things, as adults are less often "taken".) i get the feeling 'us' doesn't mean the other lords, whom he disdains. maybe, karl was abducted with one or more biological family members, and the cadou experiments proved fatal with them? it could further explain why he hates miranda so damn much, and the way he's the only one who understands that she doesn't truly care for them. the others only saw what she had "gifted" them - whereas, perhaps very early on, karl lost something precious to him at the hands of miranda. maybe he was the first to see her monstrous side.

and if miranda did sort of raise him, where'd he learn the engineering? donna's an amateur botanist, alcina paints & had enough knowledge of science to successfully make her daughters, and moreau's an amateur (and unsuccessful) scientist as well... did heisenberg teach himself, like the others seemingly taught themselves about their hobbies? or maybe did miranda, brilliant in her own right, teach him in an attempt to bond? would she care enough to? doubtful, but maybe she felt compelled to, in an attempt to win him back, after killing off that hypothetical family member (or members?).

there's so many loose ends... it's both frustrating, and incredibly stimulating. i love puzzles lol

#resident evil #resident evil 8 #resident evil village #karl heisenberg #lady dimitrescu #alcina dimitrescu #mine #txt #re8 #meta #lore

[realcube]

What BNHA Heroes have their s/o saved as in their phone

Class 1A x Reader

+ Aizawa and Shinsou

tw// cussing, cringe smh, lots of love <3 

Class 1A

Yuga Aoyama 

he has you saved as ‘my ✨star✨’

and honestly you love it because he calls you that in real life too 

Mina Ashido 

she has you saved as ‘bubs 💞💓💖💝💘💕’

 the only reason there isn’t more hearts was because of the limit smh

she changes it every few weeks to a new pet name though

also she calls you that irl sometimes

Tsuyu Asui

she has you saved as ‘my flower 🌺’

honestly, the only reason she put you as that rather than your name because of your intense love for flora

every date you take Tsuyu on is always to somewhere with beautiful scenery and an abundance of flowers

Tenya Iida 

he has you saved as ‘beef stew’

he originally had you saved as ‘(Y/N) (L/N)’ 

but you showed him that you had him saved as ‘Honey’ so he wanted to save you under a pet name too

however, he couldn’t really think of one so he asked for you assistance and you told him that most cute pet names come from food

“So, what food do I remind you of, Iida?” 

“Beef stew.” 

Needless to say you both were laughing your asses off for a while after that 

but it’s still cute because beef stew is his favourite food just like you are his favourite person

Ochako Uraraka

she has you saved as ‘(L/N) <3 ’

she wanted to use a heart emoticon but her flip-phone doesn’t let her smh

Also she doesn’t have a pet name for you yet but she is working on it 

like she tried calling you ‘baby girl’ but then you explained to her the sexual undertones to that name so she stopped and she’s been too embarrassed since then to try again 

Mashirao Ojiro

he has you saved as ‘tail boy’s s/o 🤪’

y’all had a whole-ass discussion about this one time lmao

y’all were brainstorming ideas for what you should save each other as in your phones

you didn’t want to have something basic like ‘babe’ or ‘my heart🥰’ but rather something funny and you suggested (jokingly) to save his contact as ‘tail boy’

and rather than being offended like you thought he’d be, you both ended up laughing your asses of together for a solid 5 minutes (at least)

so you saved his contact as that and since he couldn’t come up with a funny nickname in relation to your quirk, he just saved you as ‘tail boy’s s/o🤪’

 Denki Kaminari 

he has you saved as ‘ASH CECHUM 😩😳💦🌚💓🧀'

plz don’t ask about the emojis idek

anyway, he saw that you saved him as ‘Pikachu <3′ which makes sense considering his quirk..

so he took it upon himself to save your contact as - in his own words - “That guy who owns the Pikachu from Pokémon’ 

however, despite the fact he has watched Pokémon before, he had no idea how to spell Ash’s second name and apparently the thought never came him that; ‘hey, maybe I should google it.’

so he just sounded it out 

as for the all caps, contrary to popular belief , he does know how to turn it off

he just chooses not to for the aesthetic and also it takes a lot of effort 

that is why he doesn’t use proper punctuation either 

Eijiro Kirishima

he has you saved as ‘love bug’

honestly, you’re not too sure of when or why he changed your contact name after y’all started dating but..

you thought it was cute but..a bit cringe

obviously you didn’t say anything about it though, you weren’t trying to be mean to your boyfriend for no reason

it’s not like he called you that irl

however, he’d be out of his mind if he thought you were gonna save him as something like that 

the best he’ll get from you is ‘Kiri babe 🤘' (get it? bc...rock!)

Kouji Koda 

he has you saved as ‘love bug’

ASKJFCWB YOU THINK IT IS OUT-OF-THIS-WORLD ADORABLE OML

like it makes sense because he like talks to insects and stuff and you’re his lil love bug cause you are his lover and stuff hhhhh

also because of the size difference between you and him, i mean, you are basically the size of an insect compared to him 

in short, Koda supremacy  🙇‍♀️🙇‍♂️

Rikidou Satou

he has you saved as ‘sugar pie’ 

honestly, poor man

he was completely clueless when you asked him to save you as something cute 

like, he know what you meant...but he had no idea what to go for 

so you chose for him 👍

and you made a pretty good decision tbh I mean, it’s cute! it relates to his quirk and all

and he has started to call you that irl sometimes and it always makes your heart go brrrrrrr

Mezou Shouji 

he has you saved as ‘hunk’ 

ok, i know i said Satou was a poor man but let me just say

THIS POOR MAN 

you told him it’d be cute if you both saved each other as cute pet names in your phones and dead ass him response ‘you’re not my pet though..’

AAAAAAAAAAA

so after a lot of explaining, as an example you whipped out your own phone and showed him how you had saved him as ‘hunk’ 

...he really went and just copied you

you thought that was so funny and precious though so you didn’t ask him to change it

Kyouka Jirou 

she has you saved as ‘my melody 🎶’

ok, so it started when she noticed that you use the same pen everyday - a My Melody one

she thought that was so fucking adorable and she kinda started teasing you for it; not that you minded though

she also thought it was so cute when you’d get all flustered 

so one day she just decided to change your contact name to that 

it also kinda tied in with her love for music (but mostly her love for you uwu)

Hanta Sero

he has you saved as ‘my honey nutter butter biscuit’

after Kirishima called his s/o ‘love bug’ infront of y’all that one time, you both spent the next hour taking the piss and laughing at how over-the-top couple nicknames are sometimes 

so just #for the meme he saved your contact as a hyperbole of what those cringe couple pet names are like

oh and you have him saved as ‘My beloved sweet peach taco’

Fumikage Tokoyami

he has you saved as ‘Helena’

yeah, he wanted to be edgy and save your contact after a MCR song

(no, he does not know that Helena is about Gerard’s grandmother but don’t you dare tell him)

Shoto Todoroki

he has you saved as ‘(Y/N) (L/N) 💖’

you texted him something during lunch one time to see his reaction while you were sitting next to him but then you noticed that your name in his phone was simply ‘(Y/N) (L/N)’

you mentioned it briefly but you didn’t make a fuss out of it because it really wasn’t a big deal

however, he asked to see what his name in your phone was and you showed him

you had saved him as ‘Babey ( •̀ ω •́ )✧’

he went home and did some research on some good pet names to save you as in his phone

after that, his search history kinda looked like;

‘pet names’

‘pet names for humans’

‘pet names for lovers’

‘cute nicknames for my girlfriend’

‘cute emoticons’

he deadass came in the next day and the first thing he did was pull out his phone and show you the emoji he put next to your name

“Look, (L/N). I found this emoticon and put it next to your contact name in my phone.”

yes, he sound like boomer..obvs

he spends 90% of his free time training rather than on his phone 

and the time that he is on his phone, he isn’t using emojis, he is searching shit like 

‘how to hack into a credit card without the PIN’

Tooru Hagakure

she saves you as ‘❤😘’

no, she doesn’t need to save you as your name to remember who you are 

she’s not a peasant

Katsuki Bakugo

he has you saved as ‘pretty stupid face’

originally it was just ‘stupid face’

but you noticed it and just dropped a subtle comment like “hey, that’s mean.”

so he came in the next day with ‘pretty’ added to the start

“i am genuinely too nice to you sometimes.” he’d say

“THE STUPID FACE PART IS STILL THERE”

“I KNOW BUT I ADDED PRETTY TO THE START!!”

“Wow, tch, such I gentleman-”

“I know-HEY WAIT WAS THAT SARCASM?!”

Izuku Midoriya 

he has you saved as ‘sweetest love muffin’

you that one couple i mentioned in Sero’s headcanons?

yeah, that’s y’all

you are both literally that couple

“No, you hang up.”

“No, you hang up!”

“Nooo, cause I’ll miss you”

“I’ll miss you moreeee”

he literally threw a bunch of his favourite adjectives into a pet name lol

also your contact name for him is something on a similar wavelength

Minoru Mineta

I know most y’all would’ve even give him your number lol

but for those who would 🤮

he has you saved as ‘sweet cheeks’ or sumn 

Momo Yaoyorozu

she has you saved as ‘My McMuffin’

HOL UP LET ME EXPLAIN

ok so she let you take her to McDonald’s cause you wanted to see her reaction since she is used to gourmet cuisine or whatever

so it was sure to be entertaining 

and it was 

but not in a good way

she was almost sick after she had a bite of a big mac and then she tried to wash it down with the Sprite but then she fainted for like a solid 10 seconds

once she came back, she obviously wanted to leave..so you did 

A year later, y’all are in the town and both of you are starving 

But Momo realised that she didn’t have her card on her or any money but that was fine because at least you had your debit card on you 

You had enough money on it for a taxi back to Momos place and a McMuffin each

Obviously she didn’t want one but when you started eating in front of her, of course she wanted a taste

and so it was love at first bite

she loved it so much so of course you bought another one for her and she consumed it in a millisecond (not literally)

so now she has your contact saved as the one thing competing against you for her love - a McMuffin

Shota Aizawa

unfortunately he does not have your contact saved as ‘kitten’

instead, in his phone you are saved as ‘The One  💙’

simple, yet it effectively shows his admiration - just the way he likes it

 and he only added the emoji to make your name stand out more so he could easily tell whether he was gonna ignore the following message or not

because if Mike is texting him telling his that he needs the extremely important documents that Aizawa keeps in his coded filing cabinet, Shota will be like -.-

but if you text him asking for him to pick up chocolate on his way home, he’ll be like 🏃‍♂️

Hitoshi Shinso 

he has you saved as ‘big daddy’

plz don’t ask 

it’s an inside joke between you and him

okay well, if you must know 

y’all were trying to come up with the most absurd nicknames for each other that kinda sound legit 

some other gems 

‘Muscleman’

‘Big scary snookums’

‘sexy giant’

#mha #bnha #bhna headcanons #mha headcanons #mha aoyama #mha mina #mha tsuyu #mha asui #mha iida #mha uraraka #mha uravity #mha ojiro #mha denki #mha kaminari #mha kirishima #mha koda #mha sato #mha shouji #mha tokoyami #mha jiro #mha sero #mha todoroki #mha hagakure #mha bakugō #mha deku #mha izuku #mha midoriya #mha mineta #mha momo #mha yaoyorozu

[ghostofcitrus]

more gender crisis bc i need somewhere to document this shit and also if u wanna read and say smth that’s cool too 🥺 fair warning it’s kinda longgg. but there’s a tl;dr and i tried to make the paragraphs short so it’s easy to read and i sorted the thoughts by paragraphs

ok so when i see a girl or group of girls or smth i, for the most part, am like yeah same. i have the same lived experience and like yeah u look cool and i relate in a lot of ways.

but like i also feel the same w non-binary ppl. i see agender ppl and i’m like oh nice that sounds like how i want to live MY life!! i get jelous. i saw a gender ambiguous person the other day and i thouvht i was going to lose my mind i was like AKSJSHJSJSNS Y O U. I WANT TO BE YOU. i talked to them i was like 😭😭i love your hair😭😭 and it was so compelling just seeing them i got my hair cut later that week. i like it.

and i cut my hair and i’m like y e s. and i’ve always wanted a very small/flat chest and have planned on getting a breast reduction (meaning i want basically no tits. i’m like a DDD rn. and i’m short and have a baby face so that’s like. very noticeable. pain.) ASAP. but i like dress and being seen as a girl? but i also want to be non binary, but it feels like something im striving for. i don’t feel like i’m there. i feel like i WANT to be there but i just keep hitting roadblocks.

when i think about OTHER girls, i’m like yeah. i relate to that. but when i think about myself. fully isolated. i want to present like a feminine agender person. i am connected to my girlhood. girl, sister, girlfriend, daughter... all of them accurately describe me. but i also like person, sibling, partner, child.

i like femininity. i like being seen like that. and being seen as a girl is cool and fine. but i don’t feel like it accurately describes all of me. but i’m like scared??

i want to be a “girl” in the way that when u look at me ur like ... is that a girl? my face i like lmao. it’s round and feminine. cool lol. my body.... i wish with like all my heart i woke up one day w/o titties or major curves. but i’ve literally work so hard to accept and like myself in my body. YEARS of forcing myself to look in the mirror and compliment myself. deconstructing fatphobia was a big part of it. but in my head. with no mirrors around. i think of myself as less curvy. a small fame, but not really curvy. much more neutral features. i forget what i actually look like. but when i do look in the mirror now i’m like she’s pretty. i like how she looks. nice. but it doesn’t really feel like me. but i feel cool. it’s like nice makeup that’s someone else chose for u and never comes off. like yes. that’s nice. but... it’s not like “me”. i feel like that about most of my features. but i’ve grown up in them. i don’t hate them. i think they look pretty and i feel confident enough like this. and after all the work i’ve done to get to this mindset... it’s just not what i want.

i think part of what’s messing with me is i’m automatically more comfortable with other girls/afabs, like we just share experiences and i can generally understand how they socialize. guys like,.. not so much. but most of my actual friends have ended up being guys. but im naturally wary of guys. and most around me end up being fucking republicans anyways. and another part of what’s getting to me is when i’m going about my life, i enjoy being stereotypically feminine. like i like to be taken care of, feel small , that bs. maybe it’s internalized misogyny that i feel like the only way i can be that is as a girl.

i also think i just have no idea what it would really feel like to go about the world non-binary. like i just want to keep blending into the background. i don’t want to be that noticeably different, i’m already autistic.

i think it’s also weird bc since middle school have been having periodic gender crisises but they always end in me just getting embarrassed, finding transmeds on the internet and also getting embarresed, not wanting to stop being feminine, or deciding it’s just not worth it.

and i think another thing is, i’ve always felt more connected to girls, but always on the outskirts of that, but that might just be because i’m autistic. but like i’m feminine in the sense that i like dresses. and being taken care of that and that shit. girls tend to really fucking irk me a lot of the times. i don’t really feel “connected” to them, more like “stuck” with them but making the best of it. some are pretty cool :) tbh it’s mostly just other autistic or queer girls i vibe with. other than that.. i struggle a lot to feel connected.

speaking of being autistic.... i’m realizing a lot of what i’m feeling is similar to how i felt when i first started to consider that i was autistic. when i was alone or in a space i was totally comfy in, i felt very confident that i was autistic. but when i was around people, i was like no i’m definitely not. and even now. i know i mask whenever i’m not alone. but i’m literally so fucking used to it it’s not hard at all. it hardly feels like a mask. just a different version of me. not the most authentic, but it’s how i operate around others. so whatever. not what i like per say. but in most cases, i can deal with it and still be perfectly happy (ish). this is exactly how i feel about all of this gender shit.

but i think part of my hesitancy to identify like this is i’ve never met ppl irl who identify as non-binary. that wouldn’t be a group for me to find and relate to and be comfortable with, i’d just be the different one. and i’m already different. and people don’t really get neopronouns and that shit.

ok and i’m anxious about my boyfriend as well. he’s a straight guy, idk how he’d feel about me being non binary. but i don’t want to sacrifice our relationship, so it’d be fine, because i also like my name and pronouns now. i like the shortened version of my name better tbh but i think my name sounds cool. mostly because saying it is a vocal stim for me, same with my partners name fore some reason. i just think they’re good names. they feel good to hear and say. and i’ve always been described that way and i’m like yeah that’s me.

i like dresses. feminine clothes? yes pleaseee. i like how girl are generally the ones who get taken care of. i like feeling small and dainty. i like being silly and cute. but like ... silly and cute arent like “girl things”?? but idk.

but i like “girl”. not “ladies” or “woman”. that feels too much like “female” and the only time i feel like i relate to that at all is in very specific situations. i’m feminine. i like that. i wish i could be feminine in an androgynous way tho????????

TL;DR: closing thoughts. if i were the only person on earth and i could do whatever i wanted like magically. i would change my appearance to look like my picrew... but like for an ex think Crona from Soul Eater of Ed from Cowboy Bebop. both of them are androgynous but when i see both of them i’m like they’re kinda feminine too! like that’s what i want to look like. i’d probably go by Citrus and neopronouns and maybe she/her (they’re fine but i feel like i’m lying about being non binary when i use them). ya know. how i want to be. but in reality. i am scared of that. it sounds like a lot of work and a big change that i could probably never really achieve. i also hate change. and constantly explaining shit.

also do cis people PINE over this shit the way i am? i’ve done this multiple times for years. not consistently bc tbh i have other shit i need to spend energy on but when i’m not pouring energy into somewhere else i tend to circle back to this. maybe that’s a sign that i’m right.

#my post #citrus speaks #citrus gender crisis #long post #questioning demigirl #demigirl #nonbinary #questioning gender #gender questioning #terfs and transmeds literally do not even look in this posts direction #anyways. when i realized this is how i felt when i was realizing i was autistic shit kinda starting clicking and feeling more valid

[firelord-frowny]

itsmerandi replied to your post:I finally watched parasite and what the FUCK

Lol another mutual of mine is watching it tonight too! PLEASE I’d love to hear your thoughts!

@itsmerandi Okaysolike?????

literally WHERE do i even BEGIN omg!!! 

So, as far as lying to get well-paying jobs working for rich people, I wasn’t even remotely mad at the son or the sister. Like, the son was actually kinda qualified for the job, even though he didn’t have the credentials to prove it, so like, I ain’t mad at him for forging some documents and lying about his education lmao. The sister was a bit shadier, I guess, lying about being a psychologist, which like, that wasn’t necessary lmfao. But I still wasn’t too mad, bc hey, a girl’s gotta get paid. 

BUT THEN! When they framed the driver for being a perv??? And then got the housekeeper fired by triggering her allergies and then convincing Mrs. Park that she had fucking tuberculosis??? That was vile! Like gosh! It’s one thing to lie your way into a job, but it’s another thing entirely to GET ANOTHER WORKING CLASS PERSON FIRED so you can take their job!! Which like, I mean, I guess being broke can make people resort to hella unsavory things, but woooow. That was sooooo messy. 

But the whole time, I’m enjoying the wacky shenanigans of this family of con artists living it up in a mansion that isn’t theirs, getting drunk, making fun of the rich folks for not having a clue that they’re being duped, and I’m just having myself a grand ol’ time. 

BUT THEN OMFG WHEN THE OLD HOUSEKEEPER SHOWS UP TO GET HER FUCKING HUSBAND OUT OF THE BASEMENT???? WHAT??? LMFAO WHYYYYYY!!!! WHAT IS HE DOING THERE!!! AND WHY DOES HE SEEM TO HAVE A CREEPY OBSESSION WITH MR. PARK??? I literally just. Don’t even know what to say about that lmfao ew ew EW. 

But like wooooooow that scene where they were hiding under the table while Mr. and Mrs. Park were snuggling on the couch and like... Mr. Park starts talking about how the dad has a weird smell... he said he smells like a fucking boiled rag! A BOILED RAG, RANDI!!!! That’s! So MEAN! A boiled rag!!! Not just a rag, not even a dirty rag, but a BOILED rag. Boiled. BOILED. I can’t. I CANNOT!!! This poor man had to listen to someone say he smells like a BOILED RAG!!! I felt so sad for him omfg!! 

And then when they finally sneak out of the house and return home to find THEIR ENTIRE NEIGHBORHOOD FLOODED IN SEWAGE??? And they go in their lil home to try to salvage anything at all, but it’s just. Ruined and disgusting!! :( And like, jeez, the daughter broke my fucking heart with the way she so quickly resigned herself to abject apathy. Like. There is not one single thing she could do to make the situation even a little bit better. She’s helpless. She’s watching her home become a literal cesspool. Shit is exploding out of the toilet and she just fucking accepts it, and smokes a cigarette, and chills on the toilet while shit spews all around her. Like jeeeeeez. That scene Got To Me. That was the single saddest moment of the film for me. And the fact that after all of that happened they had to go back and work for this rich family??? Heartbreaking. You lose everything in the blink of an eye because you were too poor to be able to afford to live somewhere where there’s lower risk of a catastrophe happening, meanwhile you have to smile your way through working for filthy rich people who have probably never had a reason to even worry about losing their home.

AND THEN!!!!!!

The birthday party. The fucking birthday party. 

Randi. 

RANDI!!! 

what the FUCK!!! 

The sister! The poor sister!! She was kind of a shitty person, yeah, but damn! She didn’t deserve that! :( :( 

AND THEN THE DAD STABS THE OTHER DAD all because he saw him pinch his nose shut at the smell of the crazy basement man! But tbh I lowkey felt like I would have wanted to do the same thing lmao like jeez, you classist lil shit, your son’s birthday party just turned into a Mass Knifing, and you still have the presence of mind to pinch your nose at someone’s stank???? 

But then again, i know i often feel like i would rather Literally Die than smell something stanky, so idk lmfao. 

But anyway,

Jeeeeeeeeeesus fucking christ! 

What! A fucking! Nightmare! 

And then goshhhh when the son decides to get rich and buy the house??? And the dad is just being a creep living in the basement?? That was some pathological shit omg. And it made me so saaaAAAAD like wow, there really are people out there who want so badly to be rich that it’s like a legit fairy-tale-like fantasy for them. Like, they just go and stare longingly at big houses. Which like. On the one hand, I can sorta imagine how poverty might make someone long for exorbitant wealth, buuuut personally, I can’t imagine legitimately wanting that kind of lifestyle, let alone longing for it and feeling depressed about not having it. I mean, I can see, at most, how it would be cool to spend a few nights in a luxury suite with room service and fancy showers and plush robes. But like. I don’t need to be wealthy for that lmao I just need to save up a few grand to treat myself to a lil fancy vacation maybe once every few years. It’s not at allllllll something I value enough that I would want it at my fingertips every day. Like, I really don’t feel even remotely envious of wealthy people beyond the fact that they don’t need to worry about the cost of food or housing or health care. Really, I’m more likely to pity them for various reasons that I’m currently too unfocused to articulate. But yeah like. The fact that people are so often and so intensely encouraged to aspire toward obscene wealth is sick and, especially when coupled with poverty that’s manufactured and built into a society, it can make people so spiritually/emotionally ill. :(

But oh oh!

Also??? I was surprised how much I appreciated the portrayal of the rich family??? I mean yeah they were a tiny bit elitist but they were mostly just a nice, normal family. In media that depicts dynamics between rich people and poo people, I’m so used to the rich people being portrayed as snobby and evil and selfish. But these folks weren’t any of those things. They were just normal people. Normal people who have a few personality flaws that stem from being accustomed to being able to have whatever they want exactly when they want it, but like. They were still nice, kind people for the most part. A loving husband and wife who are invested in using their affluence to make sure their children can thrive. 

Which I mean like, I don’t mean to suggest that ~oh wahhh, rich people are unfairly portrayed in the media~ or anything like that bc that would be dumb lmfao. But in this specific context, I liked that even though they weren’t ~good guys,~ they definitely were not villains. Just! Wealthy folks who are mostly just minding their own business and throwing their money around!

#itsmerandi

[moldy-mold]

Diary Post: My Thoughts and Processes on Making “Silent Strength” It’s lengthy, taking place over long period of time. Mainly written for my future-self to remember what I went through, but also for anyone who is curious. Now that the project is over, I can post without reservations. There are certain things I need to keep secret though, so if I’m vague I do so intentionally!

Basically, a lot of number-crunching, physical labor, and psychological labor.

It started off as kind of a joke tweet I made. I had enough content to make a Tales Of art book and people were receptive to it. So… I thought maybe I could go somewhere with this. A few weeks later, I suddenly had a lot of Kratos art. Like. 80% of all my Tales art was Kratos. It didn’t make sense to make a broad Tales Of book when really most of it was Kratos.

I hadn’t made a book since I was in college despite it being one of my favorite things to do. They were never art books, just some editorial design projects that totally didn’t count. This book… would be my first-ever art book.

Several times, I came close to having enough art to print a book - the last time was my large collection of Yusuke Kitagawa, but the quality wasn’t where I wanted.  At that time, I was still experimenting with my iPad Pro and figuring out Procreate, so that was what I used him for.

NGL, I was pretty afraid of looking like a clown. After doing all this work, what if no one actually buys it? I was talking to some friends and they said they would buy it. It was enough for me. In the end, I’m creating something that I love. - The first thing I really wanted to work on was the cover. It needed to be epic but also mysterious (lol)… It was a good time to practice lighting and backgrounds. The cover had to be freaking Fantastic. I spent 3 days drawing nonstop. I was on vacation so I could spend full days just drawing. It was really intense. I would stop in the evenings to go for a run or else my legs would never get circulation again.

The hardest part was keeping it secret. I wanted to share it with the world right away bc I was so proud of it. Well, all I could do was show it to my parents and some close friends. They didn’t know who Kratos is, but it was obvious I was crazy about him.

Initially, I was doing some hand-lettering for the zine title instead of using a typeface. Tbh, I was so sure I was naming this zine “Blame Your Fate!” bc that is such an iconic line. But it just didn’t work with my cover, which looked… a little too serene for that. So… Silent Strength or Divine Strength? I asked around and got my answer.

But what size? All of my art has been on letter canvases. I wanted it to be large so you could see the details in the art. I’ll just start with that. - Luckily, I had all my Kratos-related art in one place. I started my InDesign file and threw everything in there just to see what it looked like. Man, I draw a lot of boxes… But I didn’t want them all next to each other. I also wanted to kinda organize it by the people Kratos hangs out with. There’s a Yuan section LOL… and a Lloyd section… and an Anna section. Idk, I tried to get some kind of order in there with a sprinkling of full spreads here and there to keep it fresh and interesting for the eyes.

I hadn’t worked with InDesign on such an intense level since college. I forgot all of the tips and tricks we learned in class. Spent some time reading on how to do things again… like adding page numbers. - I started drafting my pre-order form. It’s my first time making a google form like this. It’s kind of fun? I spent a long time on it, despite how simple it was. This was going to be my “Store” so it had to look and sound good. - My friend introduced me to charm-making. It seemed easy enough, and I wanted to give my zine more oomph. Besides, I’ve always wanted to make a charm.

I remember someone saying they’d buy a book of just the 4 Seraphim if it existed. I like them too and they lack art imo. In the end, I decided to do a polaroid charm. It’s not really that unique but I wanted Kratos to have actual friends to hang out with for once LOL.

She was going to do a group order to try to reduce the costs. I thought maybe 4 weeks would give me enough time. In the end she said I only have 2. I work well under pressure, so needless to say, I did make that deadline. I actually sketched the whole thing on the plane headed home. - After playing the game the second time, watching the OVA again, and reading “Offerings to a Star,” I have gained a real soft spot for Yuan.  My friend once said, “If you weren’t stolen away by Kratos, you would be in love with Yuan.” Lol. I’ve been in a “Kratos and Yuan hanging out” mood lately, so of course I needed something good for the zine. They’re so cute together! Now… what is the bro-est thing I can draw?

I was currently in Florida for my friend’s wedding. I was friends with the groom and his best man since high school, so that makes it 10 years now. Seeing how they’re still friends after all this time, despite living in opposite sides of the country, was really moving to me. Of course, me being me, I could see Kratos and Yuan’s long friendship being similar to this, if they had gone to school together. I just had to draw it. - When I got back from vacation, I did some research on zine sizes. Mine was HUGE compared to others. I just didn’t quite realize it until I held a magazine in my hands. It really is huge…

I settled for a medium size. 7x9. I really liked how it looked. Petite but not too petite. Unfortunately resizing my book had messed up my artwork placement so I spent hours rearranging all the text and resizing my images. I found out afterwards that there’s a way to retain the format while changing the document size. Gee, that would have been helpful 4 hours ago.

Sadly, choosing a custom size booklet makes printing more expensive. But I wanted it badly enough that I’d be willing to pay for it. Letter size is just too large… - I decided to stop dragging my feet and post a promo. I just really needed a deadline for myself to get this all done before July ended. I’m happy it was well-received. A lot of people like Kratos huh…

Anyway, the pre-order is due in a week and I still don’t know what all the costs are yet. I need a physical proof ASAP to weigh at the post office! - Something possessed me one day to do another drawing. I don’t usually do painterly style (mainly because it’s really difficult and takes 10x longer) but I just REALLY wanted to push myself on this Final Piece to the zine. I wanted it to be… radiant. Almost religious. I worked on it obsessively. From breakfast to sundown. The only time I would stop was at 7pm to go running or else my legs would give out on me.

Call me crazy, but I would save my progress on my phone so I could examine it for errors during my warmup. I also spend an hour examining it for errors before going to bed. It’s a miracle I hadn’t dreamt of the painting. - I sent my files in on Sunday in hopes that they start working on it first thing on Monday…. and it HAPPENED! They finished before I even woke up. I think they start work at like 6am…

Of course, I drove over there as soon as I heard so I can get a look. “Please… please let the colors be okay,” I prayed as I was driving. I barely remember driving there, I was so lost in thought. It would be another long ordeal if I had to fix all the colors.

Thank the stars. The press proof looked BEAUTIFUL!! I was screaming to the client coordinator how much I loved it. I mean, I worried for a looooong time that everything would turn out too dark (it usually does) but it was PERFECT. I was especially worried about the cover, which contained a lot of yellow and I def did not want it to come out mustardy… But it was great in the end!

The press operator is a quiet man. He’s got a scary face and never smiles but I think he’s secretly nice. He has done a lot of favors for me in the past without my asking. He was the one to print, bind, and trim the book for me. Obviously he had to have seen what I was drawing. I wonder what he thought of it…? He walked away before I could express how happy and thankful was. He didn’t need to hear it. It was like he already knew. So cool…

I immediately took it to the post office to weigh it. I needed as much info as I could get and plus, I was dying to know for myself. This is the week I was supposed to open pre-orders and there was still a lot I needed to do. Take pictures, create mockups, pricing, etc.

NGL, all of these costs were building up fast. It was so darn expensive to make a zine while also keeping prices down. But I wanted so much more for my baby. Extra glossy cover, perfect binding!! I knew by the end of this, I probably wouldn’t make much money. It hurt a little, but I tried to think that it was for the greater good. Learning experience and all that. And creating something beautiful. Especially something beautiful of Kratos. - Pricing was really the hardest part. I pretty much threw profit out the window. However, I definitely did not want to be losing money. My dad and I had worked together to create a spreadsheet of expenses to make sure my head was above water. I followed it… loosely.

My friend came to talk to me at the right moment. I was sort of panicking at the prices. She made me realize I was thinking way too hard about it and gave me some tips based on her own experience. It really put my mind at ease talking to someone who understands my woes.

The truth of the matter is, the book is wonderfully made and has a lot of pages - countless hours of drawing. There is only so much I can do about pricing. It is what it is… I just needed to come to terms with my own worth. - Boy, what am I going to do once the zine is done? My friend says that I’ll be so over Kratos that I’ll stop drawing him (but the love remains). It’s like… all of the intense planning, working, struggling nonstop will just suddenly… stop. TBH, I’m running out of ideas. I spent it all on the zine. - Photoshoot today. I had to paint my nails purple for this occasion. Unfortunately, I couldn’t get the look I wanted in the apartment. It’s just so naked without props. I think I’ll take it to a cafe for some nicer backgrounds. I talked it over with my friend and decided to do a quick flip-through of the zine as a promotional video. I used the most professional video program I had on hand… Snapchat. It actually turned out pretty legit and of course I slapped stickers on there because it’s Snapchat.

I had to tape/hide some of the pages for the video because I wasn’t actually done with the drawings. I had the printers print it anyway so I could examine it for color accuracy.

I’m really stressed about pricing now. It turns out I had a lot more international fans than I anticipated. I wish I took notes on interest earlier in the game to cater to them. I had a list of “possible buyers” and I only just now decided to check where they live? Foolish.

I did another cost analysis on paper to figure out what my goal was to make up for the charms. Right now they’ve cost me a fortune for something that was supposed to be giveaway. Other things that rack up are packaging costs, PayPal fees, and some other supplies I needed for this project.

Maybe I shouldn’t have made it 40 pages. It is an impressive number, but no one is really paying for quantity. I think 25 is a better number lol. If I had done that, I could have had my super-gloss cover like I wanted. :’(

There is hope though. And I’ve placed it in the hands of my followers to come through for me. I think I’ll open pre-orders on Saturday or Sunday, depending on what I finish. - “Losing your cool will only lead to poor decisions.” 
Thanks, Kratos twitter bot. You always know what to say.

I read this post today on what makes people buy zines. Very interesting!
 https://twitter.com/andythelemon_/status/1141469048653398019 - Photoshoot part 2 today. My friend and I went to a cafe nearby that had some nice atmosphere in hopes of finding the right shots. I brought all of my Kratos merch just in case. I’m glad I did though, since the tables were pretty sparse and it was difficult to capture the backgrounds without getting a bunch of random people in it too.

I would have been the photographer, but I definitely wanted my hands in the shots. In a way, it was meaningful - to show that this was made by my own two hands. Plus, I wanted to depict natural interaction with the product. It made it feel real.

The photos were cute! I feared it would look a little amateurish with all the merch in there, but I think fun was what I was really going for, not “professional.” And plus the flip-through was a Snap anyway LOL. As long as the photos have good lighting and tasteful composition, you really can’t go wrong with “fun.”

Now that I’ve finished editing my photos, there really isn’t anything holding me back from opening pre-orders. I’ve pretty much come to terms with my pricing. If I fail to break even, I’ll just have to open commissions to try to make up for it. I was telling my friend on the way home, “I gave this zine EVERYTHING I had to give. So at the very least, I won’t be disappointed in myself.” No stone left unturned, no detail left unchecked. It was perfect according to my standards. I really love my zine okay?!

I thought I was crazy for not only choosing a small fandom, I narrowed it down even further by picking ONE GUY to make this zine about. She replied, “Even if it’s small, those people who love him now must be EXTREMELY LOYAL to still be in love with a character from a 15-year-old game. All of them will want your zine.” - I went to bed that night with the intention of making the pre-order post live in the morning. I was so nervous I couldn’t sleep. I was wide awake until at least 5 or 6 am. Luckily, I was able to doze off for a an hour or two before I would shake myself awake again. It was a mixture of anxiety and excitement. It was the moment of truth - to see if all my effort made a difference. Was it going to sell? - The pre-order post looked really freaking good. I’ll give it that. I even made a YT account just to post that darn preview video on tumblr lol. It was definitely fun seeing everyone’s excitement and we all just freaked out together.

I broke even! That’s what really matters. Honestly at this point, I couldn’t care less if I made profit or not. I now know how much people really like the zine and that alone made me so happy I could die.

I was particularly fascinated at Google Form’s ability to transfer all the data collected into a spreadsheet. That is extremely helpful. I spent hours organizing the data. It was really fun…?! Now I can tell who gets invoiced and who paid and separate them into categories. IT’S FANTASTIC!

Stayed up late researching how much adding tracking could be. I had a slight panic attack thinking “what if my books got lost in transit?” It would really hurt me to have to reprint books and ship them again. And then I realized I will need to fill out customs forms for all international orders. Yikes, I’m gonna be living at the post office lol. You can print them out at home if you fill out the form online but there are still some things I’m uncertain about. I may visit the post office later this week to ask all my questions. - This morning I sent out everyone’s invoices. I gave the international people the option to purchase tracking. It’s expensive… but I need to provide that option just in case.

I received a nice message from someone who offered to advertise for me on Instagram. Of course, I gave them the OK! I’m really so shocked they would do that… They said the liked the zine so much it deserved more exposure. My dude… I love you… T_T

I thought about advertising on insta myself earlier in the week. For some reason I felt it was going to be fruitless since I don’t have an art account on there with a following. So, I gave up on the idea. Hey it worked out in the end.

I’ve never been so organized in my entire life. I want this zine experience to be perfect. The people have placed their trust in me, so I cannot mess up. - Edited some pages in the zine. The typography must be perfect… It made me think back to undergrad days in graphic design school. Man, if only I can present this as a project - photos, videos, matching accessories and all. I’d probably get an A lol. - Orders slow down after the first day. The rest is just about getting new people to see the post and giving other people more time to decide.

I finished my Kratos stationery today. It’s going to be so cute. My friend said people would want to buy it but I don’t have it in me to do more products at this time. Plus, I want it to be a surprise.

Why make stationery? Well my real job (no, I don’t draw Kratos all day for a living) is a stationery designer! It would feel really wrong not to put into practice what etiquette I’ve learned in this business. Plus, I felt that it was necessary to properly thank all those who ordered. And it’s fun?

I started designing the shipping labels for the domestic orders since I don’t need to fill out a customs form for those. I wish I had sticker labels but… it’s okay. It will still look good in the end. - Every so often, I would get nervous at the amount of money I’m responsible for. Perhaps, if I had a store with existing products I wouldn’t feel this way, but the fact that the books haven’t been printed yet made me scared. I know, I need this money to even print the books in the first place, but I’m just baffled at my customers’ trust in almost a total stranger. I felt pressured that I could not let them down and lose that trust. It probably didn’t help that I watched a documentary on Elizabeth Holmes (Theranos) that day.

So, I prayed every single day that nothing would go wrong. I’d check my spreadsheet constantly for any mistakes. It was a little obsessive, but I would rather be that than overlook something.

I began collecting cardboard boxes. My plan was to cut them up to protect the books during transit. I would have preferred hard envelopes but they were a bit pricey. If I have to do more work myself, so be it.

I’ve been getting nice DMs from some buyers. I think my invoice due date scared them… I really did not intend to be strict, but I wanted people to pay now if they can rather than forget about it. This happens at work all the time, so the best thing to do is have it due immediately. It would not look good to have to wait on stragglers when I close pre-orders, so I’ll probably reach out when there is one week left. - My Kratos stationery arrived! Aww it is SO CUTE!!! My babies… I have a lot of notes to write so I got started right away. It’s going to be a lot of work trying to come up with creative ways to say “thank you,” but I don’t mind. I said I was going to put my all into the zine experience so I will.

At long last, the charm order has been put in motion. My friend said it could take a while… I hope it won’t be longer than 3 weeks. I really do not want to keep everyone waiting. I may ship out the ones who did not win a charm first. I mean, there is no reason to make those guys wait. I should ask the charm winners if they still want to wait and see if anyone wants to give it up for someone else who is more patient. Hm. - I finally stopped by the post office today to collect customs forms. I have my work cut out for me since I’m filling all of them in by hand. D:

I’m not used to international addresses so I think I’ll ask for help in checking them for spelling errors and typos. Heaven forbid I mess up on the very last part of the zine experience.

In my nervousness, I decided to reach out about invoices early on. If someone wanted to cancel, I would rather find out sooner rather than later. Everyone was really nice about paying and thank goodness they’re still excited.

Feeling kind of overwhelmed by all the things I need to do, but it’s a good thing. If I don’t know what to do, I can either: cut cardboard, write letters, type shipping labels, draw more Kratos for a… possible volume 2? Someone I talked to today already said they’ll pre-order a second book if I make one. Omg I think I’ll die. But we’ll see. It’s just a joke right now haha… - Preorders end today. I had another nightmare last night that the books could not be printed properly and there was nothing I could do. Why do I keep getting nightmares about the zine! I had one a few days before about people canceling their orders when I asked them about the invoices. I’ll take these dreams with a grain of salt. I’m probably just stressed/worried but everything is going to be okay. When I open my eyes, nothing is on fire.

I received my final proof a few days ago. With all of the artwork completed and changes applied. The book looks good, no doubt about it. There was only one thing I was nit-picky about but it can be fixed. The press operator offered to print another book for me to inspect. I’ll go see it on Monday and then submit the rest of the orders. I also asked to to have a meeting with the press operator so we are on the same page. It would be beneficial to have an understanding of how my book is made so that I may be more helpful to him.

I spent the day preparing shipping labels. I hate to admit, I am not too familiar with the format international addresses so I had an address validator open as I was typing them in. For the most part, everyone was helpful in already formatting their addresses in the preorder form! - My parents called me the day after preorders were closed. They wanted to say congratulations on my success. No one thought it would do this well. I couldn’t be offended by that since I was also guilty of it. I’m happy though. It feels like my love spread across the world and was contagious.

I tried to think of what advice I would give to others. Obviously, genuine love for the subject and hard work were a necessity. But it would be good to consider value. If I were selling it at this price, I had to make sure my pieces and presentation looked the part. I ask myself, if someone else sold it, would I buy it?

I sent out messages to all the charm winners in the morning. I wanted to apologize profusely at the ridiculous amount of time it has taken to get them made. But no, I’ve got to stop apologizing. I stated the facts and left it at that. Everyone was really kind and patient⁠—to which I was thankful for. I don’t usually get that when I’m working customer service. - All the books were done printing in one day. Wow! I went to pick it up immediately of course. I can’t believe all of this is coming to an end. I finished preparing the mailers. All that was left was to stuff and seal the domestic orders. They were the easiest to do so I’m going to ship those first. The rest will need customs forms, which I haven’t filled out just yet. It’s going to be a while for those…

The mailers were quite sturdy with the cardboard cutouts I slipped in them. I have nothing to worry about. I’m sure my babies will be okay! - I took a whole box of domestic orders to the post office today. Wasn’t sure what to expect. But my clerk had to input every single address one at a time while I checked for errors. Omg, why are the post office shipping labels SO HUGE. I thought it was going to be half the size. And they’re ruining my designer labels! Slight panic but oh well…

I had a long long line behind me. I’m so sorry, people. Luckily there were two clerks or I would be really sweating. Despite my intimidating box of zines, the clerk and I had Synergy and we managed to ship all of these in about 15 minutes. I received a very long receipt and quite the bill lol. - Shipped the international orders today. I was kind of a mess since I had no idea what to do. I keep wondering if I can help speed up the process in any way but I don’t think I have the option to ship first-class at home.

When shipping international, keep the post office copy of the customs forms together with the package since they use that to type the address info into the system. Also, we get free tracking, which I did not know about. The other clerk told me that we did not get tracking for international first-class but I guess he was misinformed. It’s good to know for next time. - The charms finally arrived!! And THEY’RE HOLOGRAPHIC?! It was pretty awesome, but it makes picture-taking kind of difficult!! Anyway, I was a tiny bit disgruntled that they got my order incorrect, and I even asked for a reprint. But they said no, so I left it at that. Besides, it seems the holographic effect was well-received.

I like this size that I made. It’s really cute! Larger than your normal charm but not too huge. It’s almost like an Instax photo! - There was one customer who I found lives near me! I asked her if she wanted me to hand-deliver it to her in a public setting and she agreed (to my amazement). We finally met a few days ago and talked for hours and hours lol! I’m glad to have finally made a new friend here in this town but of course she’s moving away in two weeks. <:’3

We’re going to meet again to make the most of her time left. - I shipped the rest of the orders on the following Monday. I HAD to get these out. The poor guys have been waiting over a month! I think I picked a bad time to go because I had a huge line behind me and only one guy working. People in line were getting antsy or mad. The clerk at the other post office was super fast but not this guy…

For some reason shipping to the UK and Japan nearly doubled in price since the last time I checked. RIP. T_T - Omg I finally made a mistake. I wrote a letter to the wrong person. And the contents of that letter are too personalized!!! I am dying of embarrassment!!!!! Screams!! Had to apologize to both customers too!!! Luckily they were good sports about it but I’m seriously kicking myself AAAAAAAA!!!! - The most rewarding part after sending all my babies away is seeing the commentary on my project. It is so so nice to receive positive feedback. People are happy! Happy with something I created out of thin air. Everything was worth it 1000 times over. I can die happy!

I’m especially thankful to those who show understanding for how much effort went into it. It definitely wasn’t easy and I poured way too many hours into it… not that I regret that.

I don’t want to jump the gun but I would really love to make a volume 2. Because I know I can do better than last time. New and improved art and comics! But we’ll see if I make enough pieces for another book. I was against printing 40 pages before but now I kind of like it. It feels more worth it than a 25-page zine. If i’m going though so much effort, might as well bring in the entire package.

I’ll be printing more of this volume for Aselia Con 2020. Now I know people will appreciate it.

#diary

[hello-em75]

TAGGED BY: my musk ox @chiefhiccstrid and @winxrus ! thanks guys!

last

drink: jasmine milk tea with boba! so goooood

phone call: my mom 

text message: my babe @chiefhiccstrid ;)

song you listened to: “eastside” by halsey, khalid, and benny blanco 

time you cried: two days ago when i watched inside out (how do you not tear up when bing bong sacrifices himself like he’s my hero)

ever

dated someone twice: well i haven’t dated someone once SOOO 

kissed someone and regretted it: haven’t had my first kiss yet loll

been cheated on: in my head yes JK 

lost someone special: i probably thought they were pretty special at the time, but then realized that they really weren’t all that

been depressed: no fortunately. i’ve had my bouts of sadness and loneliness more often than i’d like to admit, but i’ve always been surrounded by a loving family and i have my extra special best friend who always reminds me of how much i’m loved so i’m pretty blessed <333

gotten drunk and thrown up: not yet LMAO

fave color: i always say blue, but i’m always in some neutral color so probably gray, white, or black if it really came down to it

in the last year have you

made new friends: yep! and i’m incredibly thankful for them 

fallen out of love: if you mean an unhealthy level of infatuation then hells yes 

laughed until you cried: luckily yes

found out someone was talking about you: yeah, but it wasn’t anything bad so we’re good 

met someone who changed you: i wouldn’t say they changed me, but @chiefhiccstrid has definitely brought out nothing but the best in me since we’ve become friends, and i’m eternally grateful for that and her 

found out who your friends are: eh, i guess? we’re still “friends” in the sense that there’s still a strong sense of familiarity and trust among us all but they’re not the people i turn to first in the way that friends do

kissed someone on your facebook friends list: no kisses yet

how many of your facebook friends do you know irl: all of them pretty much

do you have any pets: nope! and it kills me every day

do you want to change your name: i used to think it was pretty basic, but now i can’t imagine myself with another one

what did you do for your last birthday: i was in las vegas with family and my dad’s friend’s family! i remember eating sushi, taking a solid nap in our hotel room, eating a overpriced and frankly not worth it “thanksgiving” dinner, opening presents, and eating cake lol

what time did you wake up today: around 10 AM LOLL

what were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping 

what is something you can’t wait for: httyd: thw (obviously) and graduating high school! 

what are you listening to right now: unfortunately, a spotify ad 

have you ever talked to a person named tom: only in my dreams bc tom holland and i are tight af in my head.

something that gets on your nerves: i could air out my laundry list here, but i’ll go with ignorant and narrow-minded people 

most visited website: i honestly don’t know between tumblr, ff.net, or one of my school websites that i have to go to everyday to get a good grade lol

hair color: it used to be a dark brown, but i got a balayage treatment done last year so it’s still brown but has streaks of blonde now too!

long or short hair: aggressively long but i honestly love it

what do you like about yourself: if looking externally, probably my eyes because that’s something people consistently compliment me on. if looking inwardly for something i like about myself (which is definitely harder), probably my sense of humor and go with the flow attitude towards most things lol

want any piercings: i have one set of piercings in my ears, but i kind of want to get another one in my ears to make it two sets!

blood type: i honestly don’t know and neither do my parents (without looking at any of my documents) so if i ever needed blood we’d be in real trouble hehe

nicknames: em is the main one, but pretty much everyone calls me emily irl.

relationship status: a questionably happy single ngl

zodiac: sagitarrius

pronouns: she/her

fave tv shows: race to the edge, voltron, trollhunters, queer eye, and the crown

tattoos: none yet! but i’m leaning towards getting one when i’m old enough to!

right or left handed: right-handed

ever had surgery: thankfully nope

piercings: only in my ears

sport: i probably would be okay at most of them if i was at all fast but nope lol

I have practiced: piano, violin, clarinet, and guitar (which i eventually all quit). 

vacation: gosh, i want to go all over the world because i’ve pretty much traveled only in the us and canada in my lifetime thus far SO LETS INTERNATIONALLY TRAVEL

trainers: if this is relevant to sneakers, then yes i have had them in the past year. but if not, then i have no clue LOL.

more general

eating: nothing atm

drinking: nothing atm

about to watch: nothing, because i should be asleep at 2 AM haha

waiting for: httyd: thw and money to fall in my lap so i can go visit all of my rad httyd fandom friends and not be fucking broke going into college

want: happiness? lasting love? a sense of security? success? is this too deep for this question bc i went there LOL

want to get married: definitely one day!

career: nothing yet! still have to graduate hs and go through college first

which is better

hugs or kisses: hugs

lips or eyes: eyes

shorter or taller: taller

older or younger: for a relationship, i would rather them be older then younger

nice arms or stomach: arms

hookup or relationship: relationship

troublemaker or hesitant: oof can there be somewhere in between?

have you ever

kissed a stranger: nope

drunk hard liquor: psh i’m not that cool jk

lost glasses: yes, but always after i get new ones luckily

turned someone down: yes, but still not 100% sure if they were joking or not when asking me out so maybe no?

sex on first date: nah that’s not really me

broken someone’s heart: gosh i sure hope not

had your heart broken: at the time i probably saw it that way

been arrested: not yet lmao

cried when someone died: if we’re talking about stoick then yes LOL

fallen for a friend: nope! at most they’ve been acquaintances or surface-level friends tbh

do you believe in

yourself: it changes on the daily

miracles: hmm i guess? like i believe that they can happen, but i wouldn’t pray for one or hope for one if there’s a way i can take to achieving something myself if that makes sense

love at first sight: attraction yes, “love” is a hard no

santa claus: at one point in time i did, but not now

kiss on a first date: it really depends on the date and who the guy is 

angels: yes

others

best friend’s name: stefanie :))))))

eye color: hazel

fave movie: httyd/httyd2, spiderman homecoming, mulan, princess and the frog, the incredibles, and probably more bc i’m brainfarting atm

fave actors: tom holland, chris evans, america ferrera, andree vermeulen, jay baruchel, lana condor, noah centineo, awkwafina, gemma chan, anna kendrick, and probably a whole bunch more that i’m blanking on lol

TAGGING: @involuntarydiaphragmspasm , @fanaticfangirl2602 , @astridthevalkyrie , @drchee5e , @hotccup , @howtodrawyourdragon , @ashleybenlove , @whosthatgal , @knowerofuselessfacts , @evilwriter37, @lutavero and anyone else who wants to do it! 

#ask meme #httyd fandom #personal

[everybodyknows-everybodydies]

ALRIGHT I have apparently a lot of things I’ve been tagged in (recently or otherwise) so we are gonna do one big post of those things under the cut here to save your dash (sorry if you’re mobile and the app isn’t doing a read more D:) - stating it now I’m not gonna tag anybody bc I took so long to get around to it oops

10 favorite characters from 10 different fandoms things -Ami Mizuno (Sailor Moon) -Elizabeth Corday (ER) -River Song (DW) -Delilah (Firewatch) -Velma Dinkley (Scooby Doo) -Molly Grue (The Last Unicorn) -Lady Macbeth (Shakespeare) -Yang Xiao Long (RWBY) -Dana Scully (The X-Files) -Tuppence Beresford (Agatha Christie)

Writing Tag 1. How many works in progress do you currently have in progress? “Just” three - Princess and the Goblin AU, a personal project, and an original work about the world’s grumpiest immortal old lady 2. Do you/would you write fanfiction? Yes and yes :P 3. Do you prefer paper books or ebooks? Paper books to own, but for schoolwork I’d much rather use ebooks as they’re a lot easier to search through when writing a paper and needing that one quote. 4. When did you start writing? Age six! We still have the word document from 2003 where I wrote an epic tale about myself helping the Boxcar Children solve a mystery in which my mom was, for some reason, a police officer. 5. Do you have someone you trust that you share your work with? Knight! 6. Where is your favorite place to write? At home, sitting on my bed. That’s where I work best in general; I don’t do well with the distractions of public places. 7. Favorite childhood book? Oh gosh. I was a ridiculously avid reader all through childhood. I don’t know that I could pick a single one, but the Nancy Drew series had me from very early on. 8. Writing for fun or writing for publication? For fun! But in an ideal world there would also be publication in the future lol. 9. Pen and paper or computer? Computer! I used to do pencil and paper when I was in middle school/high school and filled up a few composition notebooks, but I get too easily sidetracked with pencil and paper and tend to end up doodling if I try to use it for writing nowadays. 10. Have you ever taken any writing classes? I have! I did a fiction/poetry combo the summer of 2014 which was very nice, a poetry class fall of 2015, and am currently in another poetry class. One day I’ll get to have my fiction workshopped again! :P 11. What inspires you to write? Lots of things - music, dreams, other people, daydreams...

Last sentence you wrote:

She’d thought maybe she was doing it wrong, and that was why, but she didn’t quite know how to ask.

Top 5-10 songs you listen to: 1. Fire Escape by Love, Robot 2. Cherry Tree by The National 3. I Wish I Was Your Cigarette by K.I.D. 4. Pretty Girl by Hayley Kiyoko 5. Beneath the Brine by The Family Crest

that one tag thing it didn’t have a title sorry Name: Mouse Star sign: Cancer Average hours of sleep: 5-8 depending on the day Lucky number: 7 or 27 based on numbers I like, but the OCD demands repetitions of 12 or 20 so take that as you will Last thing I googled: “panko crumbed turkey schnitzel” because I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT THAT WAS AND I WANTED TO KNOW IF I COULD EAT IT Favorite fictional character: Yes I Have Lots of Those What are you wearing right now: Batman pj pants and a soft green plaid buttonup When did you start this blog: May 2013 :’) please don’t go look at my first posts I was an embarrassing child What do I mostly post: Sailor Moon, Alex Kingston, helpful art things, and lately a lot of middle-of-the-night squawking about Scooby Doo Do I get a lot of asks: on the art blog! not here though lol Why did I choose this URL: River Song + memento mori

another one that doesn’t have a title I think sorry again O N E -name: Audrey || nickname: Mouse || zodiac sign: Cancer -height: 5′2″ || orientation: ace lesbian || ethnicity: white enough to make hiding in laser tag very difficult -favorite fruit: apple || favorite season: winter -favorite book: The Last Unicorn || favorite flower: carnation? -favorite scent: vanilla || favorite animal: cat -coffee, tea, or hot cocoa? no thank you -cats or dogs? cats -dream trip: I go to an abandoned, isolated castle in the middle of a wide-open field of green. no one is around. I am wearing a soft, billowy dress. I run through the halls of the castle to echoing sea shanties. in the tallest tower of the castle I sit and fill up an entire sketchbook and it doesn’t even matter if I mess up on a couple pages because I have brought sticky notes to try that cool thing where you just slap a sticky note over the mistake and keep going. -aesthetic: old empty buildings, soft blankets, girls holding hands, scuffed up knuckles and fingertips, the pages in a sketchbook where marker has bled through in just a few spots to make it look splattered, the smell of old books, antique brass pocketwatches, cold grey skies -favorite band/artist: Anberlin -fictional character I’d date: River Song, Elizabeth Corday, Makoto Kino -Hogwarts house: Ravenclaw T W O -countries I’ve lived in: US, UK I guess now? idk does it count -favorite fandom: uhh... if we’re talking about the fandom itself then Scooby Doo, there’s so little drama and everyone is just super into these goofy kids solving mysteries, it’s great -languages you speak: English, and I’m passable enough in Spanish that I could PROBABLY survive if I were dropped in a Spanish speaking country -favorite film of 2016: I have No Concept of Time and also don’t watch that many movies. did Wonder Woman come out in 2016? that’s like the only movie I’ve been to see in theatres recently. idk I apologize -last article you read: uhh something for class, so something about Gothic feminism -last thing you bought online: a maroon sweatshirt with Scooby’s face on it. I am the coolest adult and 12yo me would be proud. -how would your friends describe you: sweet but a huge dork, very little common sense, means well -how would your enemies describe you: I am always trying my best to not make enemies so?? I don’t know?

questions Nikki asked specifically 1. You spend an entire year in another time and place for the next three years of your life. When/where do you choose and why? THESE KINDS OF QUESTIONS STRESS ME OUT because on the one hand, access to everywhere and everywhen!! BUT ON THE OTHER HAND IF I GO TOO FAR BACK INTO THE PAST I LOSE ACCESS TO THINGS LIKE MEDICINE WHICH I NEED AND POSSIBLY CONTAMINATE THE POPULATION WITH MODERN-DAY GERMS WHILE IF I GO TOO FAR INTO THE FUTURE I GET EXPOSED TO BACTERIA/VIRUSES I HAVE NO IMMUNITY AGAINST. it’s a lose/lose. so... picking close enough to not do too much damage, I’ll spend one year following Agatha Christie around sometime in the 60s, mentor my younger self in 2010, and go through all of 2014 again just so I can go see the Armory production of Macbeth. 2. Okay, be honest: do you put your laundry away immediately, or does it sit somewhere in a pile for entirely too long? IT SITS AT THE END OF MY BED FOR WEEKS YOU DON’T HAVE TO CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS 3. Describe yourself as if you’re in a fic. (Scent, appearance, aura – everything & anything is game.) “She was small and mousy, in the sense that she was a bit skittish of everything and squeaked sometimes when she talked, always too quiet for the ‘real’ grownups. She stepped lightly, and tried to take up as little space as possible, and was almost a ghost for her efforts.” 4. What non-essential thing(s) do you blow the most money on? MARKERS AND BOOKS I am a simple woman with simple desires 5. Did you have extracurricular activities as a child? Any that you wish you’d done? I did ballet and cheer in elementary school for like two years, gymnastics for a bit; journalism in middle school (say hello to the editor-in-chief of the school newspaper y’all); drama in high school - I can’t say that I wish I’d done any more actually 6. You can time travel (or not) and have your portrait done by any artist. Who do you choose? I'm gonna go with El Greco simply because his “Penitent Magdalene” haunts me 7. You’re out in public. You see a cat. How do you react? point at it and say CAAAAAAAT and hope it doesn’t run away 8. What kind of weather do you thrive in, and what can you simply not do? A bit cloudy and 50-60 degrees F is ideal. I cannot abide heat. Anything above 80 degrees is repulsive. 9. Om nom nom, breakfast! What are your favorite breakfast foods? CEREAL AND WAFFLES 10. Do you like running up and/or rolling down hills? ...not particularly... I have a weird thing about heights, and inclines do not really help D:

#I went back TWO WHOLE YEARS in my likes so hopefully I got all of the ones I'd skipped over like a lame-o #anyway #long post #like SUPER DUPER LONG #seriously it's. sad. #Mouse talks! #about me #also #writing tag #I GUESS KIND OF #there's one sentence from the AU I am Never Sharing Anywhere Or Providing Context For #anyway GOOD NIGHT EVERYONE gaoishgweoihg sorry I'm so bad at doing these in a timely fashion #shoutout to Flo for tagging me in stuff like just today so I remembered I had those to do!! #I hope it's okay I did it on the main instead of the art blog since that's the one you tagged D:

[katranga]

Disclaimer: Fic is just for fun. Nobody on ao3, or tumblr, or wherever, is expecting perfection. Most of these tips are gonna take a little extra time and effort to implement, and if you don’t feel like doing that, because you just wanna post the darn thing? Go for it! I’m not here to tell you what to do, and I’m certainly not saying that your writing is bad if you don’t follow these tips. These are just suggestions that will hopefully help you improve your work, if that’s what you’re after.

Intro: Why Revise?

To kick things off, I’d like to go over the importance of revision!! This is more of a general writing tip, but it’s a great starting point, because I DON’T want you to be thinking about most of my future tips while you’re writing the first draft. 

I want you to get. those. words. on. the. page! That’s all you should be worried about when you’ve got a blank page staring you in the face. 

There’s so much pressure to get writing right the first time, but I’m here to tell you that’s pretty much impossible. So, pressure’s off! Just write the basics so you get to know your story first. I

I know it seems like writing it perfectly will save you editing/revising time later on, but you can’t revise—let alone post—what you don’t have written because you’re stuck on one line that doesn’t sound just right. You with me so far? Great!

Honestly, writing gets so much faster when you remind yourself that no one is going to see your first draft!

So I cannot overstate the importance of revision.

Because guess what? Everything you don’t like about your first draft can be fixed in revision!

Okay. What is it?

To clarify, when I say first draft, I don’t mean the stuff you do in high school, where you write out a shitty essay on paper first and then type it up basically the same, just to prove to the teacher you wrote a first draft?? Or whatever.

I mean you just write the absolute basics of your story down, and fill in the rest and perfect it later (I’ll go into detail about how exactly to do that in my motivation post).

Now, grammar, spelling, and overall readability, are all important things to fix before you post. But that’s little stuff, and your word processor will be able to pick up on some of that, and just rewording a few sentences to make them clearer probably won’t take too much effort on your end (though I am gonna have a post about filler words and clarity and stuff like that, so if that tends to be a problem for you, I gotchu).

Besides basic grammar/spelling, most of what I change as my first draft transforms into my second or third is: 

Improving the flow of a scene (it can’t all be dialogue, unfortunately)

Pacing throughout the fic (are they falling love too fast? is this scene too long? etc)

Overall clarity (I know why the character did that, but will the reader?)

It may be different for you. Basically, you’re polishing up whatever you didn’t worry about writing the first draft.

My first drafts, for example? They’re 80% dialogue. Because that’s my favourite! And that’s what comes to me when I’m dreaming up fics. But then I go back later and beef up the rest—the characters’ movements in a scene, their inner dialogue, description etc.

Because as much as I love dialogue, scenes feel empty and too-fast with just characters talking. Similarly, scenes can feel bogged down and slow with just characters thinking about things.

But revision isn’t just about adding things! Sometimes you need to take stuff out. Inner dialogue that later gets covered by dialogue? Cut it. (Or vice versa—maybe the detail isn’t important enough for the characters to talk about, and just the mention of it within the narration is enough).

The point is, repetition needs to go. The reader rarely needs to be told the same thing twice.

Quick example from the top of my head:

Lance had lost his jacket. He’d looked over the whole castle for it, but couldn’t find it anywhere. His brother gave him that jacket. One of his last ties to Earth, and it was missing in action.

Maybe Keith took it to spite him, that jerk.

“What’s up, Lance?” Hunk asked when he passed him in the hall.

“I lost my jacket!” Lance said. “My signature jacket, the one Marco gave me! I’ve looked everywhere, but it’s gone. Do you think Keith stole it?”

Same information twice: Lance can’t find his brother’s jacket despite a thorough search, and suspects Keith stole it. No reason to repeat that. Something’s gotta go.

I know cutting stuff isn’t fun. You worked hard on that! You spent hours/days/whatever perfecting a sentence until it gleamed like a diamond, and now just because you thought of a better way to get that information across you have to get rid of it? No way!

I’ve been there, trust me. But hanging on just slows down the whole writing process. Because, for me at least, I know when stuff needs to go, or needs a massive overhaul, or whatever. I’m just digging my heels in because I don’t wanna do any additional work.

Luckily, this is where your shitty first draft comes in handy! If all you did was spit words onto the page as soon as they entered your head, then you didn’t spend a lot of back-breaking effort on whatever you need to cut! And what you need to cut isn’t anything awe-inspiring, it’s just your rough notes, so tossing it aside isn’t nearly as stressful!

Remember, you can always save scenes/dialogue/etc in a separate document! Maybe you’ll be able to salvage some it later. Alternatively, create separate versions of the doc as you edit/revise. If you end up actually needing part of a deleted scene, you’ve still got it somewhere!

And please, never think of the stuff you cut (or fics you never finished) as “wasted time”. Writing time is never wasted! You’re practicing, you’re honing your craft, and even if some bits never see the light of day, you’re still benefitting from all that work you did!

Now, I know I know I know most people edit/revise as they write. Can’t think of the next scene? Reread the previous scene and fiddle with it until something comes to you. That’s great! Revising already written material is loads better than just staring at your screen!

BUT I’ve recently started writing the whole gosh darn diddly thing without looking back and that is so much faster! While I highly recommend it, that’s obviously difficult to do when you don’t know what’s going to happen next in the fic.

Or if you just don’t have the motivation. So! That’ll be our next topic: Getting words on the page!

But for now, I’ve got an example under the cut, as well as additional resources and links if you want to learn more about revision!

Here’s where I take an old embarrassing fic of mine and revise it, hopefully clarifying the points I’ve been making, as well as proving that only practice makes better!

Okay so this is an excerpt of one of my unpublished fics from 2011. I’m just gonna be honest with you here, it was a Twilight human!AU where Edward was a massive nerd. 

For background, Bella has been at the new school like a week and is appalled at the bullying happening to Edward, who she barely knows. (It’s first person bc that’s how the books were written. Just deal with it.)

Here we go:

“They gave him a swirly yesterday,” I announced, appalled.

“Who?”

“Edward!”

Jessica shrugged, unaffected. “Nothing new.”

“Well what are they, twelve?” I demanded angrily.

“He kind of needed a hair wash,” Mike muttered.

Snorts of amusement followed.

“Stuffing his head into a toilet is not funny,” I argued.

“Yes it is, Bella,” Alice chuckled.

“Kay, next time we go to the bathroom, I’ll shove your head into a toilet,” I offered. “And we’ll all laugh about it.”

This was a whole scene, I kid you not. Now, this isn’t bad because it’s just dialogue. It’s ten lines. That’s a reasonable amount of space for a quick dialogue exchange. HOWEVER, there’s about four people in this scene, so the dialogue tags are a little sparse. ALSO, this is the first time Bella’s bringing her concerns about Edward to the group, so there should be more inner reflection on that.

Overall, it’s just way too minimalist lol. So  this is a good example to beef up.

First of all: where the fuck are we? Notice how no setting was given? Not the greatest habit to get into. If it’s already been established in the fic where people are, and the setting’s not that important, I guess you can skip it, but a quick mention isn’t gonna hurt. You don’t want the reader confused!

Since this a Twilight fic, let’s say they’re in the caf. (In Voltron fics, you’re probably gonna be on the ship, but you can always mention what room they’re in. Or, if it’s a new planet, give a line or two of description).

Explanations for changes I made are in [square brackets]:

I tossed my lunch tray onto the table before throwing myself onto the chair next to Alice. “They gave him a swirly yesterday.”

[Indicated setting. Also implied she was feeling “appalled” using verbs instead of outright stating it. Showing not telling!]

Across from me, Angela looked up from the sandwich she was picking at. “Who?”

[Indicated who was speaking—always important—as well as gave brief description of speaker].

“Edward,” I said like it should be obvious. I scanned the cafeteria for him, but the corner he usually sat in alone was empty.

[Another mention of setting. Also backed up her concern for Edward with action and not just talking about him].

Jessica shrugged, unaffected. “So what?”

“So?” I repeated incredulously.

So I’d never heard of someone actually getting a swirly. In real life. Shitty teen dramas? Yeah. Actual high school? No. It was ridiculous, and gross, and… I hadn’t seen anything to indicate Edward deserved it. (Nobody who’d ever deserved a swirly had ever received one, I was sure).

[The almighty character motivation! Note that you don’t actually have to explicitly state why they’re doing something—obviously we as the reader know the deep-down motivation is because Bella cares for Edward. But characters are not always forthcoming with information, even to themselves. Right now she’s focusing on the unjustness of the situation, and partially trying to convince herself that’s all it is].

Mike slung an arm across the back of Jessica’s chair, snorting a laugh. “He needed to wash his hair, anyway.”

“A toilet’s not gonna do that, Mike!”

[Just a cleverer response. Also, a dialogue tag isn’t needed, because no other speaker at the table is gonna be defending Edward. We know it’s Bella.]

He ignored my glare, choosing instead to steal a fry off my plate. I smacked his hand away.

[Again—action. The characters aren’t just static in their seats.]

“Well, really,” Alice began. “What’s it matter?” She sat up sharply, an idea just now occurring to her. “You haven’t been making friends with him, have you? I told you, Bella, it’s social suicide!”

[Gives Alice a chance to respond to Bella’s outburst—in this AU Alice is very concerned with popularity and does not want Bella associating with Edward. She would definitely have a problem with Bella sympathizing with Edward.]

I rolled my eyes. “No, I just…”

The whole situation was ridiculous. This wasn’t how people should be treated. Was I the only one who realized that? Was I really the only one who cared?

“Whatever,” I grumbled, crunching down on a fry.

[This feels like a more natural resolution to the conversation. Alice directly asks why Bella cares, and Bella reiterates to herself it’s just because. And then decides it’s not worth the argument. This is 2k into an (unfinished) 30k fic. She’ll make a bigger deal out of stuff later.]

Now it looks more like a real scene! 

So, to summarize, I added: Description—both setting and character! Character musing! Cleverer comebacks! 

These are just some of the things that you can fix with a keen-eyed round of revision.

--

And that about wraps this up! I didn’t want this to get too long, but it did anyway. (I’m sorry about the graphics I’m a writer, not a graphic designer. But I had to split the post up so it wasn’t one big block of text)

Was any of that helpful? Was it too long? Did the example clarify things? Let me know, I wanna make sure these tips are helpful!

--

Additional Resources That I Highly Recommend:

DRAFTING: THE THEORY OF SHITTY FIRST DRAFTS -- This post probably explains shitty first drafts better than I ever could! If you still have concerns about it, definitely check it out.

Editing & Revision Answerathon -- Okay, this video is pretty long, but I looove Max Kirin for anything writing-related and especially revision!! They’ve got a tumblr and a Youtube account filled with writing tips! If you like getting your writing info through videos, definitely check out their stuff.

Top 5 Writing Tips: Revision -- Here’s an infographic by Max if you don’t want to watch a 44 minute video lol. Also, you can go through their /tagged/revision for more!

#writing advice #fic writing advice #revision #katranga writes #i mean a lot of these tips are gonna be just general writing tips #but i will focus on issues that commonly crop up in fics #revision was just really important to go over first #idk i hope this is helpful #katranga's fic tips #i guess will be the tag

[july-19th-club]

22 24 28 29 41 49 and 50, for any character(s) of your choosing! ^^

SUUUPER late answering this (i think u sent it last night? idk i was asleep lol) ANYWAY. this is for the character ask game, so I’ll do the core four~

22. What are their favorite insults to use? What do they insult people for? Or do they prefer to bitch behind someone’s back?

Adra: A big believer in rude gestures, both traditional and specific to sign language, but too easygoing to insult someone to their face.

Judi: WOULD insult all of her coworkers daily, but needs to keep the peace. Insults everybody inside the comfort of her own head instead. Rarely swears in public. Cusses up a storm at home.

Irine: ‘vă sĕlă’ is Musŏn for ‘go fuck yourself’.

Varas: Even ruder than Irine; needs to get out of the habit of bringing peoples’ mothers into it.

24. What is their sleeping pattern like? Do they snore? What do they like to sleep on? A soft or hard mattress?

Do you know I have never once bothered to think about this? jesus let’s do this

Adra: Doesn’t realize he’s a snorer for YEARS because he lives with his sister, who’s Deaf, and he still doesn’t actually believe he snores *that* much. Likes a comfy mattress, but his understanding of comfy is a rich person’s Painfully Scratchy, so it only amounts to average. Nightmare City; needs somebody to talk to pretty frequently.

Judi: The rich person for whom Adra’s ‘comfy’ is a joke. Likes her feather pillows & luxurious blankets & shit. Sleeps soundly but not for very long, bc she’s busy all the time. Morning Person.

Irine: Not a morning person, forced to be one by circumstance. Probably doesn’t snore, but even if she did, nobody would actually tell her.

Varas: Believer in the power of naps. Occasional clairvoyant dreams mean that he doesn’t actually always get the amount of rest he appears to be getting (those things take it outta you), so constantly looking for a place to sleep.

28. What is their biggest fear? What in general scares them? How do they act when they’re scared?

Adra: Oh Boy is he afraid of Shit. He has good reason to be. Maybe his biggest fear is that he’ll never get back home, or that when he does, he won’t have his life back. He worries about his family and his home a lot, but when he’s scared/upset he tends to withdraw, so it might come off like he’s just being grumpy. He’s sad. You should hold him.

Judi: Scared that even after years of preparation, she’s still not cut out for her job and may actually be bad at it. Scared that she’s too eager to use violence to solve problems (even though she’s only done it once, and it was necessary, the fact that she was ready and willing spooks her). Talks her fears out because she’s Mature and also because she can’t be left alone with her thoughts.

Irine: Not afraid of much, but worries that she’s gotten off track with her life. She’s had a single specific plan forever, and deliberately derails it to do something else, so out of the blue it will sometimes scare her a lot.

Varas: Scared that somebody will find out about his *~~~magic powers~~~*. Scared that somebody will hurt his loved ones (like, even more than they’ve already been). Scared he’ll never see certain ppl again. Scared that he’s actually a total turd human. Scared scared scared this guy is afraid of a lot in life. You should also hold him, but probably he will try to deflect you with humor.

29. What do they do when they find out someone else’s fear? Do they tease them? Or get very over protective?

Adra: Lives in the ‘boy-I-feel-you’ camp, so if he finds out that you’re scared of something, he will sit with you in solidarity.

Judi: Will try to talk you through it and help you feel good/better, even if she’s bad at doing that for herself. Usually it works, because she’s damn reassuring.

Irine: Will try to distract the fearer with other things, but if it’s not a distraction type situation, will get protective 10/10 get u a girl like that.

Varas: Miiiiight…….not..actually notice other people’s fears as much as his own? It’s a flaw he’s working on it. It’s not that he’s being selfish, he just assumes everybody’s scared of the same things (the ones he’s scared of).

41. What’s their sexuality? What do they find attractive? Physically and mentally? What do they like/need in a relationship?

Adra: Adra is Irinesexual. Okay, he’s the token straight boy, but he’s more steve-trevor-straight-boy than mon-el-straight-boy. Kinda sits and pines from a distance and maybe works up the courage to tell the girl he likes what he likes about her once in a while, but always in a way so that if she wants she can misconstrue it as him just being a good friend. A shy guy. Needs somebody to settle down with, and definitely wants to just have a house and a family someday like his sister and parents before him.

Judi: Bi with a preference; has had one husband years ago who unfortunately died, which is very upsetting bc they were deeply in love. Currently in a new relationship with a really nice guy, but *still* not quite ready to move on.

Irine: Realizing as she becomes an adult that she’s never really been interested in anybody romantically. Probably on the ace spectrum, but fine with sexual activity. Knows Adra likes her and is 100% cool with it, but hasn’t brought it up because she’s worried she doesn’t *like him back enough* or whatever. (IMO, they may very well end up in a relationship, if he likes her and she likes that he likes her, and he can be respectful of her reservations, they might do really well together). BUT her partner would need to be somebody willing to to explore the world with her, and Adra might not be that person.

Varas: That Guy is Bi. That guy was in a happy, successful poly relationship way back in the day, but hasn’t seen either of them since Some Shit Went Down due to his being an unwilling spy for the gov’t and his home life getting caught in the crosshairs. But don’t worry, y’all, it’s endgame.

Now I’m a little upset that I’m only doing the core four, because weirdly, none of them have the major romantic arcs. The three other narrators that haven’t been introduced yet are the big hitters in that department, and two of them are sapphic, so. Things progressively get gayer and this book hardly has any romance at all in the slightest; all the ships are in the future lmao.

49. What is their most valued object? Are they sentimental? Is there something they have to take everywhere with them?

Adra: He’s really sentimental, but due to being an army deserter, he doesn’t have any special possessions with him rn. He does end up getting really attached to his uniform tunic, not bc he likes the associations, but because it is this comfortingly familiar object.

Judi: She has a kickass sword and she’s real proud of it. Once she chopped a man’s head off. It was amazing.

Irine: Has this blue scarf she’s owned since back when her moms were alive that has sentimental value, so she wears it even tho it’s getting to be threadbare.

Varas: Technically, he’s a spy, so yeah, he travels anonymously and keeps the personal effects to an untraceable amount of genericness. His most valuable thing is his power, anyway.

and 50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?

This is a great question because this actually basically happens in the book.

Adra: The clothes on his back and nothing else; he has literally no bag. He’s…not great at disaster planning and also doesn’t own much shit.

Judi: Practical clothes (one set? whyyyyy). Her late husband’s journals or important documents. Her Sword™. Good boots. Food. Toiletries. She’d pack it all up to take with her & leave on her horse, probably, bc he himself is super valuable, being a survivor of a really bad horse plague. His name’s King. In case you were wondering. You weren’t.

Irine: Change of clothes, extra scarf, small knife, provisions (nonperishable food). Maps/reading material if she thinks she’ll have the time for entertainment. Cloak, blanket, example of her work (she’s a weaver) if it looks like she’ll have to earn some money. Money. Tack. A horse or mule.

Varas: Clothes, food, money. Pertinent documents. Weapon. That’s it.

WHOOOO there we go thank you!!!!!

#long post #ask games #WOW!

[6gpymfzi-blog]

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[wishiwasdrinkingwinewithu]

C,

my sweet angel girl, i love u so much. sometimes i think about how little time we have actually spent being friends and i am forever and always shook that it has only been a year. i actually put it on my calendar recently, the 16th is the anniversary of our first la hangout when we went to alfreds and u asked me your psychological questions. such a fun, simple introduction into one of the most important relationships in my young life. looking back, that day was sort of an indicator of how our friendship would be. it was so comfortable and natural, but i also felt understood and heard on such a deep level. i felt inspired to create and document, to share more of myself with u and with others.

in our short time we have screamed about too many boys to count. they are shit, almost always. the few good ones on our list are the exception, not the rule. we live in a world where they have low expectations to meet and we are meant to mindlessly accept that. i am proud of us and how uncompromising we have been in not bending to those norms. i think if u or i had decided we didn’t deserve as much we could both have some sort of ~something~ right now. maybe i would still be with busting, miserable in dc rather than loving my work and the time i have here. maybe u would have eventually gotten somewhere with hawaiian (or asian? i don’t remember his nickname lol) bae, u would have been a stylish couple but u would’ve been so ridiculously bored and unfulfilled. or with E, maybe u would’ve told him your feelings, but forgot about how shitty he made u feel again and again, instead just letting it slide bc, well at least u have someone. but bb, that is the ABSOLUTE MINIMUM of what a boy could be for u. the base level of all base levels, and u and i both know that we deserve so much more. and fuck, it sucks waiting for that. it sucks so fucking much sometimes. u feel lonely and tired and unwanted. but bb, u are in this place bc u know u deserve better than the shit biola is churning out, than our fucking society is churning out. and if that means waiting around for a boy who Gets It and who sees u as his equal and as someone to be respected and to grow alongside rather than someone who is there when it is convenient or when they can benefit from u, as much as that fucking sucks, i know u are going to wait for that. we both are. bc we KNOW what we deserve and we are strong enough to fight for it and stand up for ourselves when we don’t get that. we know that we are whole and beautiful and full on our own, and we care about other girls feeling the same way, and that is AMAZING.

honestly, i love u so much. we have grown so much in this past year and i KNOW it still sucks and is hard. that is valid simply because that is what u are feeling. it makes sense, u make sense. our world isn’t made for single people, especially not single women. it is hard work, and u by no means have to be this perfect, strong, vision of a woman at all times. by knowing what u deserve u also know that u deserve to feel all the feelings as they come. u never need to suppress them. u are allowed to hurt, or be jealous, or angry. but along the way, never forget how powerful and capable u are. u are able to keep moving forward, even when it’s hard as hell. u are where u are now bc u know your worth. you know what u deserve. u know what u want from life and u go get it. that is so beautiful to watch. i am constantly amazed by u and i feel so honored to be alongside u, even if it’s from a distance. freshman year shelby would be so excited to see where we are now. i will always be ur person, even on the opposite coast, i will be there when u need me. if u need more from me, let me know, i want to be what u need in whatever capacity i can be. i love u my sweet girl, excited to be drinking wine with u in ny in a month.

love u and miss u always, S