#I think the fact that those people are genuinely concerned abt being seen that way

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

E*elstans get a life challenge.

Yeah. :/ No idea how people can spend so much time enjoying getting involved with things that have nothing to do with them and being so hateful toward other people. Even if I can understand being angry about people tagging hate in pro tags, it's another thing entirely when they seek out totally unrelated content and make it about something it's not. My post wasn't even tagged which means that person just searched out keywords that the non-tagging system will pick up (and also replied with nothing to do with the post and made up a scenario about the point of the post, then tried to attack me for uwu hating their ship uwu, except I don’t hate that ship so welcome to talking out of your ass about a person you literally don’t know a thing about).

Like, honestly people, get a job or something because you evidently have too much time and spare energy. e.e

I'm baffled we even have people like that in the world. I shouldn't be surprised after I've been part of the Naruto and AoT fandoms in my time on Tumblr, but ngl I'd actually genuinely tell you I think the stans in the Houses fandom are actually worse than both of those fandoms' problems combined. The stans here have been some of the worst people I've seen in my entire life.

I can't even say "maybe they're mostly teenagers" because even as a teenager basically all the people around me knew better. Bullying pretty much stopped when I was in high school. You know how kids bully other kids in grade and middle school if you have those types of schools in your area (1-5 or 1-6 is grade school in my area, and 6-8 or 7-8 is middle)? Like, when I was in high school nobody did that shit anymore. Nobody cared anyone. Either my high school was relatively tame or people in that age group just don't care anymore, but I've been to two high schools and nobody did the shit these people do (and the youngest of them probably don't want to embarrass themselves in front of 17-18 year olds tbh).

Even then though I can't fathom how people can be so malicious, and over such stupid shit. These people aim to get random people they've never met off social media through bullying and by totally destroying them. I mean really, what the fuck. No idea how can anyone grow into being such a disgusting person. :/

Really sucks because I love Houses but it's infamous now because of those exact people.

#DCB Ask #like no really what kind of person do you have to be to behave like they do #I feel bad for actual fans of the character who don't act like that bc it's the stans who are LOUD #and it makes it seem like the entire character fanbase behaves that way when they don't #and bc of them people are cautious toward any fan of the character #I've met fans of the character who are actually AFRAID to admit they're a fan #bc they expect to be lumped in with the stans and seen as someone who behaves like they do #I think the fact that those people are genuinely concerned abt being seen that way #is a pretty legit and serious thing bc there are people who scared to be seen as a bully when they're not #simply bc they like a character whose stans aim to harm others #honestly the shit the stans do is a borderline crime too if not actually a crime #bc yes cyberbullying has its lines and there's a point when it becomes stalking and overly harmful #I'm just baffled how people can even become like this and think it's okay to do this shit #they also seem to have very extreme problems with telling the difference between fiction and reality #bc they really do act like there's a real war between the character fandoms #and like they have to defend their waifu so she can win her war and kill us all and make uwu change #except her change is not going to help anyone in the real world so idk wtf they're attacking people for

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

just out of curiosity – why do you like sukugo??

i've just never seen any of the accounts i follow/my mutuals celebrate this pairing so i'm really curious!

:))))))))) i smiled so wide getting this ask anon. PLS DON’T BE ALARMED just take my hand and let me tell you abt two deeply violent homoerotic men….

okay so when it comes to sukugo i just. ADORE their dynamic and relationship. it’s one of my favorites in the entire manga and i truly think akutami COOKED with it . not only the shinjuku fight itself (which is, ofc, what sold me on the ship) but also the foreshadowing beforehand!!! like sukuna telling gojo that he’ll be the first one he kills…. the two of them making the same kind of pose in their respective volume covers (vol. 4 & 14….. another parallel which is even more devastating when you remember that the number four is associated with death in japan)….. both of them being referred to as ”the strongest.”

i actually didn’t pick up on a lot of it until we got to shinjuku!! but i just think akutami teased at their importance to each other so well and so early on.

WITH THAT BEING SAID . their dynamic. their parallels. yes. they’re both the strongest and the most isolated and those two things are synonymous. it ties into one of the most central themes of jjk that equates absolute strenght to absolute solitude — it’s a kind of curse. a curse and a blessing. and they both have it.

the main difference is that gojo knows what it’s like to be understood and loved — but sukuna doesn’t. so he can’t feel lonely. he’s never known what it’s like to not be alone. but gojo has!!! gojo has felt love and felt what it’s like to be understood, and when geto died a part of him died too. he’ll always be lonely. he’s the loneliest character in the series. and when he looks at sukuna he sees the exact same isolation that’s plagued him since the moment he was born. so what does he do about it?

he tries to teach sukuna about love.

^ and THAT’S . the most delicious dynamic ever. i take no criticism. i’ll die on the hill that this concept and their dynamic is one of the absolute highlights of jjk. it’s so GOOD. it’s so insanely good. gojo wants to teach sukuna about love/cure him from his solitude by killing him. and vice versa. it’s inherently violent and inherently tender and it makes me INSANE. to me that’s the greatest appeal of sukugo!!!! violence as tenderness is a trope very near and dear to my heart (and also VERY frequently associated w queer subtext in media…. just putting that out there……) and they do it so good. they have a blast killing each other.

also i just NEED to say how much i love the ”teach you about love” line. it’s one of my favorites in the manga and akutami utilizes it so well!! he repeats it over and over as foreshadowing and to build up the sukugo dynamic. the final reveal that gojo is ”the one who will teach [sukuna] about love” made me weep (even though it was so obvious)…. it’s just so deeply. idk. it just says so much about gojo as a character :(( the fact that he wanted to teach sukuna about love. i’ve seen some people who think that part is ooc but i disagree completely!! gojo has never concerned himself w the morals of others. not really. toji kills riko but gojo still has a respect for him and allows him to say his final words. he never hated geto despite his crimes. he supports yuji fully no matter how many people die because of him. etcetc. same with all his students.

gojo looks at sukuna and sees someone who is just as alone as he is. so deeply, deeply alone. him wanting to change that is not ooc in the slighest because that’s quite literally what drives gojo as a character:

he’s just such a genuinely good person at his core. and it coexists with the way he sometimes disregards morality. this is a hot take but i genuinely think gojo’s character blossomed fully in his battle with sukuna….. i don’t see him as ooc in it at all. he genuinely wanted to reach sukuna!! he knew he was the only one who could even hope to do so. and he tried his best.

and, i would argue that he succeeded.

SEGWAY TIMEEEEEEEEE LET’S GO. okay so let’s talk abt one of my favorite panels in the jjk manga, the panel that solidified sukugo as one of my favorite pairings Of All Time:

(two diff translations bc i love them both :3)

THIS. wow. wow. wow. i could talk abt this panel alone for hours and hours but i’ll try to be coherent……

there’s just? so much meaning to be found here??? for both of them????? not only is it a fundamental moment for gojo — being praised and acknowledged and accepted as himself rather than the strongest — but it’s also proof that gojo did reach sukuna!!! he’ll remember him forever. sukuna will never fully be entirely isolated because even millenia into the future he’ll still remember gojo. gojo nestled his way into sukuna’s heart.

and that’s just . so romantic isn’t it???? so beautiful???????? this is the culmination of gojo’s efforts; the most genuine expression we’ve ever seen on sukuna’s face. he actually looks happy.

i cried seeing that panel btw 😭😭 not a joke!! i was already crying when i started chapter 236 bc i knew how it’d end but this panel (+ the one w geto cheering gojo on in his cult leader fit) made me SOB. not exaggerating. i’ve never cried so much reading a manga… T_T

so!!!! yeah. i just love sukugo. their dynamic is so interesting and beautiful and i can never get enough of it. sometimes i love it more than stsg… don’t tell geto that though……..

#i also really love the idea of sukuna getting seduced by a lanky gay guy #but that’s besides the matter. #TYSM FOR ASKING ANONNN ILY #i love talking abt these silly guys #i miss them :(((( #ask tag ✩ #sukugo

[weaselbeaselpants]

kind of related but not- I'm genuinely sorry to be posting so much or about Lily Orchard, guys. Prior to Courtney coming on and telling us her story I was mostly just taken aback and angry with Lily as "one of those critic types" in my circle of vision.

It sucks -and yeah I know other critics don't want to hear this+Lily will use this fact as an excuse to discredit ppl's complaints abt her. but I think a lot of us were initially exposed to Lily because they knew of andor were fans of her cartoon criticism content. In my case I knew Lily from her days of Bronydom and have watched her make more and more meanMEAN material even w it's not about internal fandom dramacallouts. Back in those days and up to last year I could say of Lilly the same thing I'd say for a lot of people who annoy me online: I think she's a bully. Which is still bad, it's just not 'criminal', inherent. Comparing her to Rebecca Sugar, Lindsay Ellis, Contrapoints or VivziePop would be stupid as she really doesn't have even half the portfolio or wherewithall as any of those people -or even Zena and Poppy, not that they're angels. Lily was/is annoying because she'd use other people's genuine concerns and talking points. There's a certain takenupbyaltlight-term that I begrudginly would love to use for Lily that REALLY hits the nail on the head with her, be it as a fan, a critic or an activist. But I won't use it. Not because it's untrue, but because it's used by the same people who write her kiwifarm pages and misgender her and clearly couldn't give a crap about her if she didn't make them "lol"

But then, I actually looked at some of Britt's receipts and skimmed bits and pieces of what remains of Stockholm (I think you all already know this but @britts-galaxy-brain the links are missing now). For years, I'd known and listened to others honestly harp on Lily as some kind of counter-initiative for her going after their fav foalcon people. I assumed it was more of the same. It's not. Lily 100% wrote cp and is trying to hide it. No not fiction abt young adults that delves into erotic and sexisms; not stuff with aged-up child characters being big boobied of themselves thru the gaze or r34 artists. She wrote cp.

Essense of Thought's and that one hour long video talking about Stockholm were the first real horrifying revelation. Then I read through Brittney's saved messages from Lily and 'Tara'. Then I saw Patch's video.

THEN, Courtney came out and told everyone on here and her server everything we needed to know. I don't abide by everything Courtney says, especially about her abusers but I mean they're her abusers and please stop asking her to like the children who're valued more than her in the lives of her abusers, or at least maybe vent openly not to Courtney directly about your fear for those kids Cameron has. Yeah, I'm also concerned but idk there's got to be a better way to handle this. Anyway, as previously stated, I believe Courtney, Britt, and Patch. There's no way that those people have faked that stuff. I've heard kind of stretched explanations being true, but there's no way Stockholm was "edited by pedos" like Lily's saying it was I know I'm missing a few folks in there but I believe a lot of people have been genuinely victimized by LO and aren't just acting out of transphobia, bigotry.

Of what I can attest based on what I've seen, I KNOW that Lily Orchard wrote 'fluffy' foalcon and is saying she didn't, and also that the woman hates the word "queer".

Of what has been shown to me, I fully BELIEVE Lily Orchard is an abusive, sockpuppeting predator. Not only that, she's hiding behind other predator's existence to lie to her audience of other abused people to convince both them and herself that she couldn't possibly be a predator.

In 2013, what was 10 years from now, there was a controversy in the MLP fandom where a minor rose a (not undeserved) stink abt the askblog Princess Molestia and how it was making light of r*pe, intentionally or not. To counter this, a bunch of mouthbreathing bronies took it upon themselves to prove they weren't creeps by threatening the underrage sa victim, making r*pe porn of her while other mouthbreathers basically said "yeah put she's [the minor] annoying so it's the same kind of evil we're doing, really". Centrists.

Why this matters to me is (CW. CW. CW) you can find a post from Tara Callie, who was almost certainly one of Lily's alts at the time, admitting she found the r*pe art of Pinkiepony "hot", all the while Lily herself was publicly denouncing Pinkie's treatment by the fandom.

Lily Orchard is an awful human being. She does not have intrusive thoughts or fears of acting on those intrusive thoughts sometimes, like me and other people do. She has sexual and violent urges that she hides enough form the public to not make her followers suspect anything. She's twofaced and takes out her probable self-hate by attacking other predators. She's all deflection and lies. I can not believe a thing that vile woman says. Neither should you.

The biggest means of fighting her I think we all can do of is refusing to use her critical tag w we talk about her. Spam her "own tag". Enough hiding and denying who this terrible bigoted abusive woman really is.

Because really, her thoughts on glubshitto or whoever from Owl House are HARDLY the worst of it. Not even.

#lily orchard #lilly orchard #the owl house critical #the owl house criticism #critical fandom #steven universe critical #spop critical #my little pony friendship is magic #friendship is magic critical #Whelp at least it looks like the Helluvaverse fandom is safe from her #for now

[upsidedowngrass]

Charlotte post NOW (/j only if u want!!)

AHHH charlotte jumpscare!!!!!!!

im not sure what SPECIFICALLY to post abt her bc this ask is a little vague, BUT i do think abt her a lot!!! tho i DO gotta think about her more, she is a WONDERFUL character

bc idk what specifically, my interpretation of her post canon and WHY (also under a readmore because WOW!! i had apparently a lot to say abt her):

i think!!! she is a LOT more mellow after she gets home. like in one 16 after shes respawned its like. she seems to be friendlier? which. i think has to do w like... i dont think she was a bad person really, and i dont think shed been acting Maliciously, but when it came to having friends i think it was really easier for her to genuinely take things as worst as they could be. we dont actually get much of her backstory, so its up to interpretation as to WHY, but i think she genuinely struggled with being distrustful of those close to her. she likes them, that much is clear, but trusting people is a whole other thing

but i think she really DID view her friends as pitying her. as not respecting her, even when they werent Being cruel. they were concerned for her safety, and how her recklessness was affecting her. and i think that can end up walking a line between pity and not wanting your friends to do things that are pretty unambiguously dangerous, and what was very standard friendship ended up feeling a lot MORE like they didnt respect her or her choices

and i think what changes this is that. she DID die. and i think that contextualized for her that her friends werent concerned because they thought she couldnt handle herself, but because they just Generally care abt her yknow? as fucked up as her dying is, i think it did ultimately make her realize that THIS is what her friends were worried about. they didnt want THIS to happen to her, and i think in an odd way? it kinda made her. idk understand? trust? the people around her more. like in a 'oh, people around me dont only care about me for selfish reasons, or cruel reasons. they care because they CARE' way

and i think that, and the fact that she says that shed been thinking about this a lot? i feel like it kinda all forced her to slow down and WANT to talk to the people around her. because shed been pushing them all away because what was the point in talking to them? and i think once she REALLY noticed how amelia was doing, after thinking so much about all this, it kinda MADE her want to amend things. or at the very least, to talk to people more. shes isolated herself long enough, and its now more than ever that she realizes how much others meant to her in the first place.

(i think in some aspects, amelias method of coping also bothered her. amelias coping mechanisms werent necessarily BAD, theyre not good by real-world standards, but given the situation shes in, it was just... once of the few ways she COULD cope. but i think the flaws in this method of coping really came through once airy came back, because in forgetting everything about who she used to be, earth became a very daunting place, but now that airys back, any amount of feeling like home the plane may have unfortunately gained was completely undone. and i think charlotte actually SEES that, and its not the exact same as her own struggles, but i think she WANTS to help amelia, because she of all people knows how the feeling of being isolated, either on purpose or accident, can feel Extremely Awful. that, and she knew amelia before things on the plane got REALLY bad, and she SAW (since ive seen people note that she!!! was watching amelia do yoga w the others) amelia gradually give up, become comfortable, and then LOSE all of that

and i think, at least right before bryce showed up, it felt fucked up that charlotte WAS the only other person from the same world as amelia and theyd!!! never even spoken about it??? (like how she comments that they NEVER told each other their names. which only applies to her and amelia. that statement was intended very specifically towards amelia) and its like. i think it mightve made her a bit 'no WONDER shes not doing well. even if shes trying to act like she is' (which i dont even think amelia is doing to deflect so much as an attempt at 'if i pretend its ok it WILL be ok right?'))

and!!! once getting home i think this would all really lead her to be a bit more patient with others. i dont think the distrust would STOP being an issue, but i think such a terrible experience causing her to completely recontextualize the actions of those around her would actually help, at least a little . i dont actually know if i think shed stay friends w parker and that friend group, but i think theyd at the least keep in touch. parker clearly, even when they were arguing, STILL cared about her, and i think seeing her disappear probably was. a bit haunting, and so i think at the very least hed like to know shes Okay

also whenever people have the characters live together post canon, they only ever include bryce liam and amelia, and i GET why!!! charlotte didnt really interact w them for a looong time. but after charlotte is revived i actually see her as talking with them yknow? i dont think shed stop talking to them again, and i think her talking with amelia was a genuine attempt to help!! so i think theyd stick together. i dont imagine liam actually gets closer with any of the contestants while hes trying to send them home (tho i dont think it worsens substantially either. i think it just sorta. stays where it is? and if he did have notable interactions with any of them, itd PROBABLY be mainly w amelia and bryce, tho i dont think he DOESNT talk to charlotte too! he just has a diff sort of connection w those to, based on the experiences he Shared w them) so i think he isnt SUPER close w charlotte, but i think the others may become WAY closer w her!!! so i think if they all moved in together? that WOULD include charlotte!!! (that, and i think charlotte would also develop a sort of respect for liam . because he kinda DOES display exactly the type of traits she didnt really see people as having!!! going to EXTREME lengths to help people, including HER! so i think shed generally have many thoughts on him)

anyway !!! thats it the point is that as much as one would fuck charlotte up in her own way, i think, similar to how bryce tried to get his life together after he was first eliminated, shed similarly end up having a better ability to navigate social stuff in not such a pessimistic way as before!!!!!

#hfjone #one is a series abt the complexities of isolation man........ #how people create it and how people respond to it #i also have many thoughts on what one is abt but . theres such a theme of isolation #(also? its been a longstanding idea ive had that like #charlotte and bryce both mellow out more after one #while liam and amelia both become a bit more easily agitated #NOT that charlotte and bryce wouldnt have their own problems but like #i think BECAUSE these two were in a shittier place that made them rethink stuff #while liam and amelia were doing okay and abruptly had everything ruined #would make charlotte AND bryce actually a bit Better at Navigating things specifically #and i think charlotte and bryce are meant to somewhat reflect back amelia and liam actually #and are meant to show the different ways awful experiences affect people #DUNNO. i think i could put these four on a chart and liam and amelia would be on a diff side from bryce and charlotte #based on the general Way that one affected them #but then liam and bryce would be on a diff side from amelia and charlotte too based on their experiences in a more literal way #if that makes sense #though i think liam AND charlotte ALSO share in their stubbornness and amelia nd bryce in a desire to Let Go of things #so itd be a complex chart #ask

[steelycunt]

okay so i don’t mind reg bc w/e this is fandom innit ppl can do what they want, but i think you’re so right that remus and lyall are fundamentally much more interesting characters and so is their relationship. reg by himself is somewhat compelling but no one in the fandom seems to care abt what makes him compelling i.e. stuff that actually happened in canon not just fanfictions that he’s been featured in. for instance, i see it being stated as though it’s fact that his parents abused him which we don’t know iirc? we know that sirius was mistreated and i do think being raised by political radicals would likely cause a turbulent home life, so i doubt regulus came out of his childhood unscathed, but we have no actual proof he was treated similarly to sirius at all. he was still a supremacist, just not to the extent that his parents were. as far as i’m concerned he died a fascist, but he had a “for thee but not for me” tory level attitude about certain things.

oh absolutely! with regards to my position on regulus, im in no way trying to say that people can’t/shouldn’t like him—as you say, people can do as they like, but im just personally not at all interested in him or with what general fandom consensus has chosen to do with him. the things that would make regulus compelling in canon do not necessarily compel me anyway, but more than that i agree that a lot of people have chosen to virtually wipe those things out out in favour of creating a morally pure conceptualisation of him that they don’t feel the need to defend (not that i think anyone should have to defend having an interest in regulus anyway).

i suppose i am just not personally predisposed to having an interest in canon regulus, so his popularity is not something i fully understand, but particularly the version of him that has been created by fanon...honestly i find him irritating, and generally i find even less to be interested in in a conceptualization of regulus that strips him of agency, flaws and responsibility. i said in that other post that i dont think regulus is as complex as he's given credit for (which applies even more once fanon is through with him), and i honestly stand by it--i reckon he was fully willing, albeit having been influenced by his upbringing, to become a death eater, and i don't buy the narrative that he had no choice and was forced into it and had no personal sympathy with the politics of it all. i find it ridiculously convenient. and then, i think he started having doubts when the impact of all it all became a little too close for comfort (for thee but not for me is quite a perfect summary lol), and he turned traitor. that is really all there is to it for me. i do not think that he would have rejected his parents' ideology if given the chance, the way sirius did. but i recognise really, since i don't think a character's morality or lack thereof should dictate whether you're allowed to enjoy them, the discussion of regulus' morality is sort of besides the point lol, other than the fact that i find his complete and unrealistic redemption via fanon rather boring and admittedly a little lazy.

my comparison between his relationship with sirius and lyalls relationship with remus in the earlier post was mainly just me. making a joke of sorts and being a little unserious, but i do genuinely think lyall and remus are a lot more interesting and complex--though i 100% recognize that this is largely personal preference and im not trying to dress my opinion as an objective fact. mainly, i guess where i am with it all is that i already dont really have an interest in regulus from canon, and despite his huge surge in popularity i have never seen anything in fanon that really changes my mind about that (apart from. maybe one fic). which is fine! nobody is obligated to sit here and try and tailor their own takes on, or fondness for, this guy to attract my interest, or win me over. that is not their job. my opinion holds no more weight than the next guy's, and my lack of interest in regulus is not anyone else's problem, just like i am not ever going to exert energy trying to win someone over to liking remus or liking r/s. i am never going to go to someone's blog or fic and have a go at them for liking regulus/demand they justify themselves. BUT, in the safety of my own blog, i figure im safe to say these things xx and as far as im concerned, my favourite thing regulus ever did was piss off and die xx

#i feel like we've perhaps. been here before. and when im taking these unpopular opinions of mine a little more seriously im often conscious #of the fact that i might not be articulate enough to get across my point and therefore run the risk of just seeming like i am taking a #swipe at anyone who doesnt agree with me. which i absolutely do not want to do. but simultaenously i try to balance that with the fact #that i am entitled to voice my opinions on my blog without feeling the need to shroud it every time in the bubblewrap of excessive #placation to state over and over again how much i am not ever trying to peddle my opinions as facts or as moral truths like. hopefully #its just clear that i am just voicing my opinion here but i do worry about the possibility that it might not be. #can you tell im worried that one day ill regulus-post a little to close to the sun and get hate for it xx #anyway! less regulus and more on the r-boy its really all about...remus my special little babygirl princess <3 he is what im really here 4 #and also his cunty gay boyfriend i suppose. <3 #anon #telegram

[glowingbadger]

do you have anything in the ask box abt sfw + nsfw hcs w caspar and linhardt??-- if not, could i rq them pls?

Two Very Good Boys TM why have I not written more for them yet lol - especially Lin, he's a fav of mine for sure~

Also. Can I just say. Linhardt has so much Game. Like, half of his support chains end with him being like "what if we fucked and/or got married haha jk... unless?" and the other person just 👀👉👈

Caspar, Linhardt x GN Reader

SFW (nsfw below the cut)

Caspar:

- Caspar is as intense and energetic about love as he is about everything else. His feelings for you grow steadily as you work together as friends and allies, and he eventually realizes that there's a reason why he's always bizarrely excited for dull monastery chores like supply runs and patrols when he's assigned with you.

- When he finally confesses, it's in the middle of some such chore. He's been staring at you oddly as you work, until he abruptly says your name, then blurts out, "I think I'm in love with you." He practically shouts it at you, his eyes fiery and his face red. Once you work past the shock of the moment and affirm that you feel the same, he pumps a fist in the air, then laughs as he lifts you and spins you in a circle.

- He's not exactly "smooth" and doesn't have much romantic experience, but his unwavering sincerity and desire to be good to you makes up significantly for these. He's terrible at surprise gifts, since he always wants to get you something you'll love, so he'll spoil it by saying something like "So how do you feel about danishes??" right before heading to the best bakery in town. But when you thank him, wearing one of those warm, genuine smiles- he just melts, and he figures he doesn't have to be smooth or clever as long as he can make you smile like that.

- This. Man. Is a Cuddler. He doesn't like to be "mushy" in public, but he truly adores every-day physical displays of affection. He can't help swinging your hands a little when your fingers are laced during a walk through town, and if you're alone together, he just habitually has to be holding or touching you somehow. Caspar was never one to sit still for long- until he realizes that holding you to his chest while the two of you chat on his bed is completely addictive.

Linhardt:

- Oh Lin, this beautiful weirdo. For a long while, you won't get much of a love confession from him; instead, he just continuously puts himself near you. He doesn't need anything from you, and there's no pressure to keep him occupied in conversation- he just finds he's soothed in your presence. He doesn't question it until he finds himself even choosing your company over his studies or sleep. Then, for some time, he actually finds this new feeling rather disturbing.

- Finally, you're both enjoying a sunny afternoon, reading, casually chatting a bit, him dozing off periodically. In a quiet moment when you'd assumed he was fast asleep, he instead turns towards you and quite suddenly says, "If I were to tell you that I find myself quite insistent upon being near you at every possible opportunity, how would you describe that feeling?" when you don't give an immediate response, he follows this up with, "Would you consider that romantic attraction? Perhaps I really have fallen for you... hm..."

- Linhardt doesn't have much of a memory for birthdays and holidays (his mind is generally occupied with any number of other things), but you're not likely to find yourself doubting his feelings for you, nor his commitment. That's because he's very blunt about telling you. The delicate propriety of the nobility is of very little concern to him, so he feels no hesitation about placing a kiss to your lips in the middle of the (very occupied) library and telling you, "My, you are exceptionally lovely today." Before, of course, returning to his search for whatever tome he'd insisted he needs to review for his latest topic of interest.

- He is an excellent listener when you've had a stressful day or are in a bad mood. Though you will need to tell him directly if you're just looking to vent, because he's one to always think of a straightforward solution for you. But, as a creature of his comforts, Lin is wonderful at helping you relax. He'll hold you and rub small circles along your back until one or both of you dozes off- if you need it, he'll even force himself to stay up long enough to talk more, or recite some list of known crest effects until his gentle, even voice lulls you to sleep.

NSFW 18+ v

Caspar:

- He likes sex intense and passionate, and has no problem "doing most of the work," as it were. You may have to guide his pace a bit, as he can get a bit too excited- but he has immense stamina, so you'll certainly be satisfied by the end. In fact, he's fully capable of cumming more than once in a night, with a fairly short refractory period, so if you're up for it, fucking Caspar can become quite a workout in its own right.

- Caspar can be pretty bitey- he loves marking you and being marked, and even he's surprised by how much he just loves burying himself at the crook of your neck, or at your chest, or your lower stomach. He's been attracted to people before, sure, but he's never known he could be so absolutely entranced by someone's body before you.

- As you'd imagine, he's pretty vocal in bed, and likes it when you are too. His pleasured grunts and moans are completely shameless, communicating exactly how incredible you make him feel. He doesn't have much of an innate sense for dirty talk, but he loves it when you talk dirty. Even simple encouragement, like "Oh, Caspar- fuck, just like that! Mmmh- your cock feels so good-!" gets his body burning to his very core. He never realized it before, but his ultimate weakness is when you can tell he's getting close, and you moan out that you want him to cum for you. It's his kryptonite, and his body shudders as a powerful orgasm takes over him.

- His cock is about average length-wise, but it is thick and very nicely veined. He's not excessively sensitive or anything, but if you manage to tie him up or force him to slow his pace in some other way, it is deliciously easy to reduce him to a whiny, needy mess. He'll buck his hips up as you tease the tip of his cock with a slickened finger, desperation in his eyes as he groans out, "Ungh, Y/N, this is torture- please, I- I want you so bad-!"

Linhardt:

- He's deeply focused and fascinated by your body, and will study you for as long as you can withstand his gentle touch. He wants to know your every single turn on, your every tender sweet spot, and wants to hear every possible way you can moan his name. Related- I've seen a lot of people assume Lin is entirely and exclusively a bottom out of laziness, and I firmly disagree. We've seen how intensely he commits himself to the things that have caught his interest, and once you're his, he's going to learn everything he can about your pleasure. He's open minded and willing to try almost anything at least once, provided it's not too strenuous.

- Lin very much enjoys exploring some less expected erotic pleasures; things like circling your fingertips with his tongue, then nipping and sucking at the tender skin, or fucking between your thighs or ass cheeks without fully entering you until you beg him. His easy self-confidence and patience make him something of an unintentional soft dom. It's not that he aims to make you whimper and beg for him before he finally enters you- it's just that he's enjoying your body so much that he doesn't feel the need to rush.

- He loves cockwarming. Lying comfortably on his side with you cradled against him and his length buried in your warm little hole- it's absolute heaven for him. He gets to relax and feel completely at ease and even a little sleepy as you hold him deep inside of you, and it's adorable when you squirm a little, trying to get his cockhead to rub into you a certain way. He gives a light chuckle and nuzzles against the back of your neck, murmuring, "Now, now, don't be impatient- aren't you comfortable?"

- He's not much of a fan of the mess that can come with sex, and resents the cleanup time required, as once he's cum, he wants nothing more than to just hold you close and let your steady breathing lull him to sleep. So, he'll generally do his best to minimize marks, or a mess of cum- though, given his method is frequently to lick you clean, who's complaining.

#caspar von bergliez #linhardt von hevring #caspar x reader #linhardt x reader #fire emblem #feh #fe3h #fire emblem three houses #fire emblem headcanons #fluff and smut #fire emblem smut #fire emblem x reader

[1kook]

THE CHRISTMAS GIFT 

— AN EXPLORER UNIVERSE DRABBLE :)

SUMMARY So now there’s a present for him under the tree, but none for you. Apparently that’s up to Jungkook to purchase, which leads him to this dilemma: what did you want for Christmas? WARNINGS alien!jk, tentacle mention hehe, and uhhh nothing else its just dorky n sweet :( RATING e for everyone <3 WC 1.2k 

NOTES hello the other day i said something abt explorer jk not rlly understanding the concept of gift giving so here it is more in depth <3 just 1k of dorky alien boy trying to impress his human gf !! 

Jungkook thinks this Santa Claus fellow is quite possibly the oddest figure on your planet. A man who single handedly visits the home of every single child across the globe on a flying sleigh pulled by flying deer? Ridiculous. It’s even more ridiculous when you honor this man with a plate of cookies in the living room. 

“It’s just for fun,” you tell him, wobbling dangerously on a step stool in front of this massive tree you killed and then hauled inside to decorate its rotting carcass. The ornaments aren’t even placed in the most aesthetically pleasing pattern, a fact that greatly displeases Jungkook and his perfectionist mind. (You don’t see his extra arms slip out and rearrange them.) “It’s cute, isn’t it?” 

In all his time traveling the galaxy, Jungkook has had the honor of studying many foreign races. He’s learned the intricacies of their societies, the mechanisms of their anatomy, and the beauty of their cultures. Yet he does not recall ever seeing a society where one bearded man— who apparently gorged himself on cookies year round —held such superiority. The concept of gods isn’t exclusive to your planet, but from what Jungkook understands, this Santa Claus fellow is not a god at all. 

Oddly uniformed beings aside, there’s another thing Jungkook doesn't quite understand about this celebration, and that’s the bright red box beneath the dead tree with jungkook♡ written on the corner. It’s a gift, that much he gets, but he’s not sure what. Or why. You don’t tell him much either, simply warning him not to touch it until Christmas. 

Jokes on you, because Jungkook is no ordinary being. He knows how to gather resources from his surroundings and put them to use, an ability that is very valuable when visiting foreign planets such as your Earth. The projection box plays a variety of movies surrounding this Christmas event in the days leading up to it. It’s a festive day, primarily for large corporations to profit off of holiday cheer and convince people they, for some reason, must participate in the act of gift giving. And the thing about gift giving, Jungkook learns, is that it is reciprocal. 

So now there’s a present for him under the tree, but none for you. Apparently that’s up to Jungkook to purchase, which leads him to this dilemma: what did you want for Christmas?

The projection box says Humans similar to you enjoy being presented with jewels and clothing, occasionally electronic devices that are apparently ‘new’ for you Humans. 

But the jewels displayed are practically worthless in Jungkook’s eyes— a diamond ring? As far as Jungkook and the rest of the Sixamians were concerned, the sole purpose of a diamond was for recreational sports. Anyone could get a diamond in Sixam, they were as common as the avian beings on your planet were. But you and the rest of the Humans obsess over them, retail them for ridiculously high prices. 

Diamonds are out of the running, which leaves Jungkook with clothing or electronic devices. Similar to the diamond dilemma, the electronics don’t convince him much either. Smilodon had gotten into your room one day, completely knocked everything off your desk. While Jungkook had been able to revive your PC box, the cracked screen of your monitor was irreparable. Jungkook’s first trip to the city was that day, your visit to a Best Buy his first real outing. (You had sat him down in the kitchen and dabbed warrior paint, called concealer, over his facial markings.) The complete wonder he felt at seeing the city for the first time was shattered upon entering this Best Buy and seeing the horrendous quality of your electronic advancements. 

Needless to say, electronics are also out. 

By then, Jungkook can’t even fathom searching for clothing as a present. What did you like? He’s not sure, your preference in clothing varied everyday. Some days you enjoyed being bundled up in thick, cozy sweaters, but at night you would strip down to the thinnest materials. Did you like thick clothing or light? What was the most appropriate clothing for this season? Was there a specific size chart he had to refer to, or did Human clothing abide by the same form configuring rules that Sixamian clothing did? 

Christmas is tomorrow and Jungkook has not found a suitable present for you! His head hurts, but more importantly, his heart hurts. The projection box says Humans are greatly dissatisfied when they are forgotten in the gift-giving tradition, and Jungkook does not want that. He wants you to smile at him like the figures on the projection box do— maybe kiss him under the viscum album, or ‘mistletoe,’ plant —and just genuinely enjoy yourself. 

Time is running out and Jungkook doesn’t know what to do. Smilodon is giving him a rather disappointed look from the windowsill that Jungkook does not appreciate. It’s as he’s huffily shooing the creature away that he sees it. And by it, Jungkook means the flowerbed on your windowsill. The dirt is cold, the plants practically near death. But Jungkook knows you like flowers, these flowers in particular, because you spent all summer watering them and tending to them. You’re one of the finest botanists Jungkook has ever seen— and that’s saying a lot, considering Jungkook also considers himself an amazing botanist. Surely you like flowers?

He hurriedly gathers the last of the plants, hands shivering from the cold. He isn’t sure how to present them, how to wrap them like the Humans on the projection box do, so he’s left awkwardly hovering by the window with the dead flowers in his hand. He can’t set them down either because then they will unravel from the careful bouquet Jungkook had organized in his haste. 

You have extra limbs for a reason, his brain just about screams, and Jungkook snaps into action. Just as the tip of his limb touches your laptop, ready to watch as many instructional videos as possible, you come strolling into the living room. 

Jungkook can’t even play it off, he’s got one tentacle stretched over the entire length of the living room. 

“What are those for?” you ask curiously, casually stepping over his extended arm on your way over to him. 

Jungkook sighs, slowly retracting his limb until he can feel it slide naturally beneath the skin of his back. He wonders if his markings are that shade of pink again, the one that makes you kiss him and coo at him. “Felicitations on your Christmas,” he murmurs, handing you the bouquet of half dead, half frozen flowers. Your mouth forms a little circle, surprise and confusion painting your features. Jungkook hopes you are not as disappointed as he is in his atrocious attempt at gift giving. 

But Jungkook should know better; your Human heart is nothing like his. You’re not raised on perfection like he is, don’t even think there is such a thing as ‘the perfect gift.’ The flowers are taken from his trembling hands, clutched to your chest dreamily. “Did you pick these?” you sigh dreamily, gazing down at the dead bouquet like it’s the most beautiful thing in the universe. 

Jungkook doesn’t understand. Maybe it’s better this way. “Merry Christmas to you, too,” you beam, on your tippy toes to plant a kiss on his lips. “I love them.”

And he loves you.

Copyright © 2020, 1kook on tumblr. absolutely NO reposts allowed.

#networkbangtan #bangtanhq #jungkook fic #jeon jungkook fic #jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook x reader #bts fic #mine #explorerdrabs

[transtenzin]

ok umm deleted my first post like a minute after posting because i started panicking and had to type it out again because i didn’t save anything like the dumbass i am, but here it is again 😭

so anyways

nonbinary tenzin!!!

(i’ll be using they/them pronouns for tenzin in this)

katara and aang are trans as well. katara’s a trans girl, and aang’s not a boy or a girl and that’s all you need to know–even if that much 🙄 so it’s not like tenzin and their siblings grow up not knowing that’s a Thing, because they are both very open about gender, especially aang, who encourages them to Think Some Thoughts about gender.

and tenzin tries.

oh boy, do they try lmaoo

tenzin thinks about gender. they don’t really get it tbh. and not in a comedic “what even is gender” meme kind of way, but like. genuinely. but at this point they’re kind of too embarrassed to seriously ask. katara and sokka make gender sound simple and clean-cut, while aang makes it sound like some sort of vague, weird concept, and tenzin’s siblings just kinda took their own interpretations of these and ran with them.

like, okay, sure. tenzin is seen as a boy by the people in the around them. there are certain expectations and assumptions around this perception/what it means. they don’t necessarily like all of them–which is its own can of worms when deciding why–if that is because they simply don’t like these conceptions, or if they don’t like them because they aren’t a guy, but like… picking that apart sounds stressful and complicated.

tenzin hasn’t brought it up with anyone because it’s kind of an awkward and embarrassing thing to admit, but they Super Do Not Like how their voice has gotten deeper. after a while they have realized it is not just the voice cracking thing going on that they don’t like, but just like. in general. everything is okay until they open their mouth 🙃

it’s not like, Every Conversation, but sometimes when they’re talking to someone and it’s a bit quiet, listening to their own voice makes their stomach drop. like that’s really what they sound like. fantastic. 🙃🙃🙃 (/s)

they think about this some but like… not liking their voice doesn’t necessarily mean anything?

kya’s a trans lesbian, and when kya comes out to their family tenzin finally gathers the courage and asks her how she knew. kya admits that it wasn’t like a single sudden realization or a point in life where she just Knew like most people seem to think there is. there were a lot of things that factored into it, but one of the main things wasn’t really how she felt with being misgendered as a boy, but the comfort she took in knowing that there were other things she could be perceived as instead, and other things she could be.

that’s the first time that someone’s ever explained to tenzin their self discovery with that much understanding. it’s a lot better than bumi’s “idk. if you know you know, you know” + generally being annoying about it every time tenzin tries to have a serious conversation (bumi is agender and when they’re like “but how do you know what your gender is” he’s like “you think i would know? rip to you all with genders but i’m different 😌”)

so after this conversation with her, tenzin is just like…. 👁👄👁 omg okay…. that actually makes some sense.

that gets him thinking more, but this time in a more specific direction. they still don’t know anything for sure though. tenzin Suspects they are not Exactly a boy, but other than that??? anyone’s guess is as good as theirs lmao. they try to take comfort in know there are ‘other things’ they could be, but mostly it just ends up stressing them out.

-

after tenzin and pema are together, tenzin has been thinking about it even more, and wants to talk to pema about it. like. tenzin has decided that there is a large possibility that they are not a man, and choosing a specific label just sounds so… permanent. they haven’t talked to kya or bumi or anyone about THEIR gender, specifically, because like… what’re they going to say? “hey actually i don’t think i’m a guy” “then what are you?” “idk good question”???

but tenzin has been questioning for a while now (like. a while a while LOL), and they want to trust pema with this.

(EDIT: also time to mention pema is a trans woman. i forgot to mention this for some reason)

one day pema says something along the lines of “ur my husband” and tenzin takes the opportunity and kind of just laughs like… what if i’m not… jk…. unless…? 😳😳

it’s not exactly how tenzin wanted to approach the subject ofc. pema grows kind of concerned when they’re like “well… actually… i might not be” and needs to clarify they still very much are pema’s spouse, but like… not husband, specifically. but yes, spouse. maybe?

tenzin is embarrassed at first to admit this because they’re like 40 years old. they just had their first kid. are they not a bit old for this?? (the answer is no, there is no age limit to this sort of thing.)

pema is happy to know and tenzin is happy to have told her because even if they’re still figuring it out at least there is someone who kind of Knows that there is a Possibility They Are Not Cis. and pema’s kind of like… idk… if you’ve been thinking about this for that long then i think there is More than a possibility that you Aren’t Cis. to which tenzin makes sure to emphasize they are still not 100% certain about anything.

pema’s like okay that’s fine but like… you know that you don’t have to be 100% certain to try on a label? labels are not things that have to be permanent. if in a few weeks you are just 70% certain that you’re nonbinary, you’re allowed to say you’re nonbinary. if some time later you find another label you’re more confident in, you can change to that. you don’t have to be absolutely 100% all the time to try stuff out.

tenzin surprised pikachu face

okay so… logically, they’ve known this. other people they know have done this, including their siblings. but otherwise? for themself? it honestly hadn’t crossed their mind that they’re allowed to just. say that they feel like x is a term for them, and then change their mind later.

but as simple as pema makes it sound, tenzin kind of internally cringes at the thought of having to say ‘so i told you i was x gender but now i think i’m x”. isn’t it enough of a hassle to do that all once, but again? just because they weren’t sure the first time??? ughhh

what if they ditched the whole thing altogether? throw the entire suitcase out. who needs a label 😌😌 aang kind of didn’t either

-

tenzin starts using any pronouns (like aang did, but aang wanted pronouns to be alternated, while tenzin hasn’t necessarily specified that) by the start of lok, but only with their family and korra.

aang also didnt use a label to describe his gender, and tenzin has been trying to be okay with doing the same.

in lok, hearing pema ask “were tenzin and their siblings this crazy when they were kids?” makes them happier than they can express. it’s like there’s little exclamation marks just going off in their head. like yes!!! that is them!! them!!! Euphoria ™ 💓❤💕💞💗💖💝

and then katara’s reply with “not tenzin, she was always rather serious” and tenzin almost forgets that they have to tell korra that they can’t stay and train her because that also makes them elated, although not quite to the extent that pema using “their” did.

after that they’re still going by any pronouns, but they’ve decided they have a preference for they/them.

when they’re back at air temple island, pema asks about other aspects of gender expression. which like lol tenzin has also been avoiding that thanks 💖 they’ve just been presenting as expected by everyone else–keeping their beard, wearing their usual robes, etc. they’re just like “i’m fine as i am ig” which is true. they’ve thought about changing up their appearance but like lol. they are also on the council and tenzin doesn’t need anything else adding an extra layer of stress on those meetings when everyone already seems inclined to not listen to them. which is also why they haven’t told anyone else about using any pronouns.

-

when season 2 comes around tenzin is still not satisfied with just Not Labeling their gender, but now that they aren’t on the council anymore, they can think about it more.

it’s just… they spent a long time figuring out what gender was, how they felt about their own gender, and while at the time just leaving it alone seemed simpler, it didn’t make them any happier. it really bugs them, actually, lmao.

at this point they are certain they are not a man, and highly doubt they are a woman either. in fact, they’re still not sure if they have a gender like, at all, but they are very hesitant to put a word to it.

they’ve become used to being referred to as a mix of he/they/she/xe/etc. around their family, although their use of he/him has decreased significantly and they mainly use they/them, so when they hear the air acolytes in the southern air temple consistently refer to them as “he”, they sort of have to pause a minute, and then decide to finally say something.

they’re asked then abt their gender and tenzin’s just like… um actually i’m just not putting a label to it atm you know haha ❤

it goes over pretty well but telling other people that makes them realize how much they actually do want to label it, despite how aang used to talk about not needing a word just for others to perceive her gender, and how everyone keeps telling them “that’s valid!”, etc. etc.

the scene in the spirit world with tenzin’s spiritual enlightenment is also about tenzin realizing that they are also free to explore their gender the way THEY want to, not the way everyone else did. even kya’s answer to “how did u know u were trans” doesn’t necessarily have to apply to how they did.

tbh after that tenzin stops caring. and not in an “my gender doesn’t matter to me anymore” way but “it does matter but now i will stop worrying about trying to do gender the ‘right way’“.

afterward they decide they think they are nonbinary. it’s a label that makes them happy, and it does cover what they’ve determined their gender might be. nonbinary is a broad term, and while they’re still not sure of the specifics, that’s okay. if they later discover they’re something else, that’s also okay. they can tell people they are nonbinary, and it’s fine if they have to tell them something different later. it’s not a hassle if it makes them feel happy being out.

-

tenzin’s family can still use any pronouns for them, but now everyone else is using only they/them for them.

tenzin’s okay with being called a husband/father/etc when coming from their family despite their initial talk with pema because they trust that they Get It and know that it’s not in a Cis Way, you know???

tenzin keeps their beard (unfortunately) and keeps shaving their head and stuff but they occasionally wear dresses with long swishy skirts and the euphoria!!!!! 😭😭 they love the cloak swishing you KNOW they’d love long swishy skirts too

this is actually the happiest tenzin can remember being with their gender and stuff. people are using they/any pronouns for them, they are wearing whatever they want, they are nonbinary, AND people know!!!

also time to mention jinora is transfem nonbinary, and she’s a bit nervous about shaving her head at first to get her tattoos. tenzin reassures jinora that her hair will grow back AND she will have her tattoos, which she’s wanted and has welllll since earned. they have a parent/daughter bonding moment over her distress about finally having grown her hair out as long as it was only to shave it all off. 

and tenzin understands that her nervousness doesn’t mean she doesn’t want them–she asked tenzin about getting them way before that. they are hugely significant to her identity, too, just as they are to theirs. tenzin gets it, and keeps going out of their way to give jinora compliments and use her pronouns in front of her while her hair is still growing back.

and ingores that jinora does the same for them for a little while after they tell her they’re nonbinary. no they’re not crying over how sweet their daughter is you are 😭

tenzin is pretty much freely expressing their gender however they want and living their best life now 😌

nonbinary tenzin… ❤❤ we love to see it

also additional headcanons for other characters that didn’t make it in:

sokka is nonbinary and uses ne/nim pronouns

kai is transmasc nonbianry (he/him)

#tenzin #the legend of korra #legend of korra #tlok #lok #op #my hcs #hcs #i still dont know what tags i should be using on here but oh well #nonbinary tenzin #cc #themzin #yes i am mean and decided not to put it under a cut #i just think that everyone should see nonbinary tenzin #but #long post #there u go at least #if u have the tag filtered #lgbt #trans time #edit now under a cut

[actualbird]

Hello Zak!!! I hav been reading your TOT writings and hOLY COW, INCREDIBLE STUFF DUDE- I know virtually nothing abt these characters and yet I was hooked immediately! You made me lov these characters instantly w/o having played or seen any of the actual game. Keep up the amazing work!! But I hav also come to you today for a reason besides complimenting your stunning writing prowess. I am here to inform you abt how tall the NXX group /actually/ are. This very true and real facts may be contrary to popular belief, and idea canon itself, but I can assure you they come from a totally logically and reasonable place. My significantly lacking in TOT knowledge brain!!! And so, onto the facts: (messurements are in feet)

MC: 5’7”

Some might think that she’d be far more intimidating if she were taller. They are wrong. She will kick you in the shins and bite you ankles and you will not be able to retaliate. Many tall people hav under estimated her. They often end up on the floor.

Artem: 6’5”

On the other hand, people might think Artem is intimidatingly be around, due to his height. This is is also wrong. He’s always bending in on himself and bending over things in a a way that works against the intimidation factor of his sheer height. Except when he wants to be intimidating. Then he’s an extremely well postured menace.

Vyn: 6’2”

Vyn is the type of person who would act lik they’re tall even if they were short. His height is a non-concern to him, he says. He’s a lier though, because every time he’s in a picture w Artem, he’s standing on his tippy toes. He staunchly denies this fact.

Marius: 5’8”

He insists he’s not short. And honestly, he’s not, but it’s hard to look anything other than short around people like Artem and Vyn. He’s really glad he an inch taller than MC though. He has not stopped bringing that fact up, nor does he plan to.

Luke: 5’5”

He’s short of the bunch, but he doesn’t care. He fully understands the competition the other guys seem to hav going on, and he wants no part. Being short is actually really useful! He can get into vents, lurk in the shadows, and blend into a crowd much easier than say, Artem ever could. And maybe he likes being easily holdable. Sue him.

(Apologies, did not realize how long this got!!! Sorry abt that)

hi, kitkat :D

first off, thank you so much for reading my totstuff!!! and thank you for your kind words wahhhhh. always a huge compliment in my eyes if im able to hook readers who know close to nothing about the source text, haha.

second off, THESE ARE HILARIOUS HEIGHTS YOUVE SENT ME. hilarious in all senses: the fact you assigned heights by vibes, the fact you detail character traits in relation to those vibes, and the fact you said with your whole heart---

---that 5'5" IS SHORT......

im 5'1". please know that this whole ask was SURREAL FOR ME TO READ. i genuinely did not know it was even POSSIBLE to be 6 foot 5 inches tall, like what the fuck, that is a giant, ur messing with me arent you, you HAVE TO BE JKFBGJFDGF

that aside, i do love this a lot. huge agree that artem gives off gentle giant vibes but also SO AWKWARDLY and vyn trying to make it seem like he and artem are the same height is the funniest fucking thing skgbdgjsdg. mc is not afraid to go for the kneecaps and marius Will use that extra inch he has on her to hook his chin over mc's shoulder during from-the-back hugs

AND HONESTLY, BEFORE I KNEW CANON HEIGHTS, I GENUINELY THOUGHT LUKE WAS THE SHORTEST OF THEM ALL

HE GIVES OFF SHORT KING VIBES!!!!! HE IS CAPABLE OF VENTING LIKE IN AMOGUS!!! AND HE IS HOLDABLE!!!!!

fantastic ask youve sent me, im not going to believe people can grow to be 6'5" though, thats gotta be lie.

and just in case ur curious, heres the actual (at least for the boys, mc doesnt have a canon measurement) heights HAHA

(made by gyuppii on twitter)

(EDIT: 180cm is 5'10" not 5'9" but artem has still got those extra 2 centimeters on luke hehe)

#PLS SAY SIKE. PPL CANNOT GET THAT TALL RIGHT?? RIGHT????? #this ask is some kind of microaggression against ppl who barely got to 5 feet kjbKJBFGJD I MEAN THIS JOKINGLY #asks #kittykat5e

[angeltrapz]

m sorry ur havin a rough night, but i come bearing Chainshipping asks 💙💙 I wld love to hear ur thoughts on Adam teaching Diana photography, n how Lawrence feels seein her bond w Adam! + also favorite lil things they do to surprise each other, when they know th other is havin a rough day but not admitting it, or just bc they thought th other wld like it— lil stuff to make each other smile. + bonus, as far as the polycule goes bc we’ve both kinda touched on tht it takes a lil while to warm up to th idea, how do u think tht conversation goes between Adam + Lawrence, n who is th first other member where Lawrence is like “oh hey, I love them too”

thank u,,, I appreciate it sm <33 I always love getting asks frm u!!

Adam + Diana bonding over photography:

ohhh my gosh that would be adorable!!! I feel like it takes a little while for Lawrence to feel comfortable with having Adam and Diana interact - not bc he doesn't trust Adam or think he'd be a bad influence, but just bc he wanted to be sure things were going to work out between them; he didn't want to put Diana through that, have her get attached to someone who might end up not sticking around (again, not bc he thought he and Adam would split! he just wanted to make sure they were established for a while is all). but the moment he does? ohhhh these two melt his heart on the regular.

I kind of have this belief that Adam is good with kids, but not even he knows why? he has a heart fr kids, he can't help it, but he certainly didn't see himself becoming involved w someone who already had children,, that being said he loves Diana, and she loves him just as much!! it's kind of similar to the Daniel situation but leaning more toward the parental side of things; she just thinks he's about the coolest adult she knows and it's very evident. so they get along really well and god does it make Lawrence happy - honestly, it only serves to make him fall harder. Adam lets Diana paint his nails and will paint hers, he builds pillow forts for them to hide in, he'll read to her before bed, things like that; it's honestly not a surprise that she's interested in his photography!

the very first time she asks him about it, it starts with her being like "this is really cool!! how did you get so good at doing that??" and Adam's just sort of like. You Think That's Cool?? and that's kind of when he starts to become aware of how highly Diana thinks of him,, he needs a whole moment later where he just hides his face in Lawrence's chest and breathes through it bc Holy Shit. this is also where it kinda starts to set in for him that like, this is his family. (the next time he has a moment like that is when she calls him dad for the first time, but that's later down the line!)

hdkjsaf anyway. I feel like he wld be really excited to share this with Diana!! knowing that she's genuinely interested in it helps a lot and the fact that she's such a visual/hands-on learner like himself also helps things along!! I really like the idea that he gets her one of those disposable cameras to kind of give her a chance to explore it herself, so like the three of them will be at the park, Adam and Lawrence sat on one of the benches (when Adam isn't chasing her around the playground), while Diana runs around (within their line of sight, of course) and takes pictures of everything she finds interesting + worth capturing and Lawrence just sort of sighs and says "she's having so much fun. I love you." and Adam's just. "I love you too,,, 🥺🥺" it's so overwhelmingly domestic that Adam just needs a second to sit w it,,

Diana's also a quick learner so it's really cool when they compare her pictures to ones she takes later on!! it's definitely something that serves to strengthen their bond and kind of the catalyst for Adam to realize Hey, Diana Loves Me Too (ESP bc I feel like Adam would be super nervous around her at first, due to being Lawrence's new partner/not Alison, so her approval actually does mean a lot to him,, I gotta be honest I think abt chainshipping + Diana family dynamics all the time)!!

for Lawrence it's just like. Diana's approval ALSO means the world to him. he Loves seeing his partner and his daughter getting along so well; Lawrence didn't ever really envision himself being divorced prior to their game (even if he and Alison had discussed it/at least a separation of sorts), so he's kind of unsure about navigating dating after something like that, especially where Diana is concerned, so to have her love Adam just as much as he does is so so important. he definitely tears up over it sometimes, he can't help it. these are his two favourite people.

-

little things they do fr each other:

for surprises I think they're relatively lowkey just bc neither of them really like Big surprises,, most times it consists of smth like "I saw this and thought of you!" or "I thought you'd like this so I picked it up!" and that's more than enough for them. occasionally though they Do like the spoil each other in their own special ways, so sometimes Lawrence will come home from work and the entire apartment is clean, there's music playing from that little stereo they have, and there's Adam in the kitchen with flour and brownie batter on his cheek and his shirt and in his hair bc maybe he's not the best cook, but he can bake (at least. brownies.) and Lawrence will just stand in the threshold of the kitchen fr a little bit after dropping off his coat and briefcase and lining up his shoes in the hallway, just watching Adam with this lovesick grin on his face until Adam finally turns around and sees him (he's not shocked, Lawrence always announces himself) and smiles back and it's so. <333

other times Adam will come home from a shoot to see Lawrence on the couch with Adam's favourite takeout, already in his pajamas and with their comfiest blanket next to him on the couch, and he's got a movie ready (usually The Princess Bride, as I've mentioned b4,,) and is just like "hey, I know you haven't eaten yet so I ordered in. wanna sit w me?" and of course Adam is always like of course I do!!! it's definitely one of those things where he's just smiling the whole time because this is a level of bliss he never saw himself reaching b4 Lawrence. he never imagined having someone to come home to, someone who loves him like this, and it's as simple as Lawrence making sure he eats + just wanting to take the time to relax w him while watching smth they both enjoy to make Adam realize this is love.

as for little things they do fr each other when they're having rough days? for Adam, I like the idea that Lawrence tosses one of his sweaters into the dryer for a little while so that it's warm when he takes it out, and then he brings it to wherever Adam has holed up while he rides out a shitty day and is just like "here, I know you're not having a good day so I brought you this. it's warm :)" and Adam is always just. "thank you" bc verbalizing things is hard on his bad days if he's not completely nonverbal (he does know the sign fr thank you + teaches it to Larry so he knows), but on the inside he's definitely just like 🥺🥺 ohhh my god I love you so much?? the other is that he'll make one of Adam's favourites for dinner because he firmly believes in the concept of comfort food serving to make things a little bit better. then they'll just sort of curl up on the couch or in bed and Adam will hide for a little while (like u've mentioned b4) until he feels good enough to at least lay his head on Lawrence's shoulder and watch him read/fill out crosswords (my fave hc concerning Lawrence is that. he likes them. he gets books of 'em Adam is so endeared by it).

for Lawrence, since he's the kind of person that throws himself into performing tasks (stress cleaning, paperwork, tending to things around the apartment, etc.) to keep his mind off of how upset he's feeling, I think the biggest thing Adam does is after a little while of Lawrence doing his thing, he'll come up behind him wherever he is and just kind of lead him away like "why don't you rest for a minute." and at first he wasn't rlly receptive to it, preferring to just sort of shake Adam off and be like "I'm okay, thank you for asking," even if he was very obviously Not Okay. eventually, though, all Adam has to do is put his hands on his shoulders and knead for a little bit before Lawrence just sighs and melts into it. he tenses up a lot, so his muscles are often really sore as a result, so when Adam does that it's a reminder to kind of sit back before that happens. the other, like you've also mentioned b4, is that Adam just holds Lawrence when he needs it, which is something he hadn't ever really experienced b4 but comes to appreciate very much. this is usually when Lawrence feels safest/the most seen + heard, so it's often where he cries it out, too.

otherwise it's just those little things; Lawrence will make Adam his cup of coffee in the morning, Adam will do Lawrence's tie for him b4 he heads off to work (his one weird ability, he supposes), holding the door open for each other when they're out and about, getting each other smth to drink + little snacks, stuff like that!! (one of my other favourites: sometimes when they go out for dates, Lawrence will pull Adam's chair out for him. Adam used to think smth like that wld be very stupid. when it's Lawrence, he comes to realize what was so endearing about it - not that he'd say that out loud tho)

-

polycule discussion:

I've actually thought abt this b4!! I feel like Adam wld be very very nervous abt it at first, just bc he knows it's something that a lot of ppl still consider to be unconventional + impossible, but he would definitely want to have that talk w Lawrence bc 1. that's his partner, and 2. of course he wants Lawrence to be aware of that/wants to hear what his feelings are. like u said though, he doesn't reject it entirely or anything like that - he just sort of needs time to understand it + see how it works, as it's absolutely smth he would have no prior familiarity with (esp being w Alison in a monogamous marriage).

the important thing here is Lawrence is comfortable asking questions. he might word things a little funny and might make Adam laugh a couple times, not unkindly, but he's genuinely so curious abt it and unafraid to ask (which is better than coming up with some false assumption)!! it's both delicate and not, which I think Adam wld prefer rather than it being too serious or bc of disapproval obviously. he always feels more comfortable in convos where they can still contain serious subject matter, but they can still laugh a little bit.

so it does take Lawrence a while to warm up to it, but not out of a place of ignorance/ridicule; he just needs to familiarize himself w it is all! and that makes Adam feel sooo much better abt it. of course there was never the intention not to tell Lawrence, but to have him accept it and maybe even consider it down the line does wonders to relax Adam.

I've actually thought abt who the first other member Lawrence kinda fell for wld be and I think it wld be Eric! it can definitely be partially attributed to the fact that bc Adam spends a lot of time around him (they ARE dating), Lawrence does too as a result, but there's more to their relationship than just being. boyfriend adjacent. they have things in common that they don't really w anyone else (i.e. being a parent that has been through a trap + had their kid directly endangered by Jigsaw and are helping them cope) and they kind of have very similar feelings (guilt/thinking things were their fault, feeling like they failed their kids, feeling like they're bad ppl like Jigsaw thought, things like that) so they bond through those things - and, of course, over both of them dating Adam.

u've mentioned this b4 + I agree w it so: I feel like Eric might kinda be the first person other than Adam to realize Lawrence's tendency to overwork himself to avoid having to confront his upset feelings. a big thing Eric does for him is he'll bring a little snack w him and maybe something to drink and he'll hand them off and be like "I know you're busy but you gotta remember to eat, I'm just gonna go chill over here," and then he'll just set himself up in a corner in the same room so that Lawrence isn't alone. he doesn't try to get him to stop, doesn't ask him what's wrong though it's clear he'd listen if Lawrence wanted to share, just makes sure he's taking care of himself + reminding him that ppl are there for him. and fr Lawrence that's kinda like. Oh. bc it's that silent type of understanding where they don't even have to announce it out loud. Lawrence doesn't feel the need to explain himself. having that not only w Adam, but Eric too, is definitely smth that sort of leads into that realization of "I think I love him too."

and there are moments where Lawrence will come to spend the night at Adam + Art?(it's up to you)/Eric's apartment when Eric falls asleep facing Lawrence while Adam is pressed up against his back and knowing the issues Eric has w his chronic insomnia + feeling safe enough to drift off to sleep easily, seeing the way being around Adam helps him relax and that being held leads him to sleep quicker than anything else, it just kinda makes Lawrence wanna hold him and not let go. he knows Eric wasn't shown that kind of tenderness often, that physical contact was something he was denied for so long, and it just. makes Lawrence Seethe that someone would ever do that to him, in this protective way that Lawrence can't deny feels a lot like love. it only ever increases when Eric wakes up screaming later and ends up with his face against Lawrence's neck once the tension fades away and he just sags against him, crying. Lawrence allows himself to hold Eric then, and he still feels like he never wants to let go. this man is so compassionate, so protective himself of the ones he loves and wld do anything to keep them safe. he is a big dog of a man that makes ppl feel held + understood and Lawrence loves him a little bit, he can't help it.

I think Lawrence finally fully realizes it when Eric stumbles across him having a panic attack bc he'd forgotten to turn the ringer off and it just so happened to go off at that moment. he's trembling and it's hard for him to breathe but Eric just kind of crouches down in front of him and is like "focus on me for a moment. can you do that?" and he rests his hands on Lawrence's upper arms. when Lawrence nods Eric takes one of his hands and places it on his chest n says "can you breathe with me?" and somehow, Lawrence steadily finds himself relaxing and able to draw more air in until he's not shaking as hard and he doesn't feel like he's sucking in air through a straw, and by then he's so exhausted by it all that he ends up with his forehead against Eric's sternum, and Eric just holds him, no words. and he says, "it's okay that it still upsets you, it's smth you can't help and that is fine. I just want you to know that." like he knew what Lawrence needed to hear, and it's just. oof. that's when Lawrence is just like Oh I See. I Love Him. I Love Him Too.

Adam is beyond delighted abt it when Lawrence actually tells him, and Lawrence can safely say that he's definitely more open to the idea after that!!

#the domesticity of it all... #it's what they deserve #saw #adam #lawrence #eric #asks #thank uuuu I was so excited to answer this!!! #I love yr asks they get me Thinkin #long post #as u can see im Very fond of yr lawrence/eric interpretation!!!

[reversecreek]

ziggy strutting up to me like this gif as i hold up a crucifix n say begone begone vile beast BEGONE from my vicinity i will NOT buy u a happy meal wretched little boy...... some live action rp to start this off..... and SCENE. takes my bow. his pinterest is here n his playlist is here.

* dylan minnette, cis male + he/him  | you know ziggy benson, right? they’re twenty-four, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, all of his life? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to hand crushed by a mallet by 100 gecs like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole glitching televisions impaled by remotes, nonchalantly texting the babes as a stove fire ravages your kitchen & cartoons turned up so loud it fries your eardrums thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is november 24th, so they’re a sagittarius, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( nai, 24, gmt she/her  )

HISTORY;

from the second ziggy ws born he didnt stop screaming. within the first hours of his life he gave his father an ear splitting headache tht prompted him to say “that uncooked chicken’s fucking demonic” n joke abt popping “it” in the oven to roast. when this understandably received disgusted glances frm the nursing staff he ws all like “jeez alright alright i’m kiddin i’m kiddin can’t a guy have a joke around here?” n i feel like that sets up their dynamic so nice n sweetly <3 (sarcasm) (lips pursed)

frm day one he ws just honestly a rly hyperactive child. when he laughed he’d shriek it out at the absolute top of his lungs bc he’d just get this huge giddy surge of energy all the way to the very tips of his toes n it’d hit him like a shock from a fork in a plug socket. their parenting style ws rly just lazy tbh.... they didn’t have much time for disciplining him. ziggy’s mum wld halfheartedly be like “ziggy quiet now....” n then go bk to nuking whatever vegetables she’d defrosted until they tasted like dinosaur bones..... this wld not make any difference in ziggy’s behaviour

his father rly just took the stance that it ws ziggy’s mum’s job to discipline him or raise him in general which is. 🔪 please enter the 20th century sir.... get ur noggin sorted..... needless to say he wsn’t much involved in ziggy’s life n honestly generally jst didn’t like him. ziggy was a responsibility he didn’t want (accidental prregnancy) n in his literal words once said (blatantly while ziggy ws watching cartoons on the sofa) tht ziggy just “harshes my fucking vibe a lil bit”. 

he wound up leaving when ziggy was six ish.... ziggy watched thru a crack in the blinds as his mum tried to grab at his jacket to make him stay as he lugged out his suitcase..... she even tried to physically cling onto him so he cldn’t get in his ride bt the door wound up slamming n she sat on her knees watching the lights pull out the drive n even long after they were gone. ziggy didn’t rly kno what to do abt this (emotions hd never been smthn he particularly understood, his own or how to handle other people’s) so after watching her fr 5 minutes he went out n gently shook her shoulder n was like. mom come inside u look weird out here. FKGHSFHGSFHKGFHKSGSFGHK. this was him trying to show love <3

ziggy’s mum is like.... rly relationship dependent. she gets all her self worth n validation frm whtever man she’s dating.... so she went on this like.... wild rampage of jst. dating a very large string of men. they ranged frm dreadfully boring to downright awful n were always below her standards. ziggy quite literally hated. all of them. every last one. even one that tried to b nice to him by offering to help him do his math homework when he ws 13 (bc ziggy was struggling a lot w this) n in response ziggy loudly barked until the man gt scared n stumbled backwards into a dining chair on his way out of the room. KGHFHKSJHFJGSHKFG

while him n his mum hv a kind of strained situation (there’s a great deal of resentment from her end n kind of. blaming him fr “driving his father away” n it’s never spoken abt bt it’s very much Present in their relationship n honestly ziggy kind of resents her too fr bringing some of the men into their lives tht she did) there is. love there...... sometimes she’ll like. reach out to cup the back of his head n he’ll duck his head away n be like wtf are u doing checking me for lice? n she’ll jst smile like :)...... knowing that’s how he loves. KHSFGKJGHKSFGFHKGSHF. ugh we love men who know how to process their emotions yesssss king give us nothing <3

(abuse n violence tw) idk i won’t go into it too much bt even tho ziggy’s constantly like 🙄 when his mum shows him affection he wld quite literally. kill fr her n almost did one time.......... narrowly avoided getting charged w assault when one of her bfs was drunk n evil n he went into protective mode.... idk he. has gone thru a lot n seen a lot n so has his mum. they look after each other the best they kno how despite the negatives in their relationship.... it’s complex <3

literally got in trouble so. often. at school. he ws always hyperactive (undiagnosed adhd n also probably not helped by the fact he ws jst allowed to eat sm junk food w 459729457952 sugar percentage all hours of the day) bt when his dad left n like. dealing w acting out so severely at home where his mum’s bfs were concerned it rly escalated..... i jst think he ws like. literally a terror. probably got suspended so many times. maybe even was permanently expelled before he cld get his diploma honestly. set off a firework in school hallway. smthn absolutely reckless n stupid.

hs hd a bunch of jobs mostly in the service industry...... usually ends up getting fired.... worked at mcdonald’s fr a while n then one day he went in rly high n ate three cheeseburgers in front of a weeping child who hd ordered one.... promptly gt fired bt he ws like yo fuck this place i’m quitting n threw off his apron n was like who’s with me??? who’s joining the union??????? to the rest of the staff n they were all mostly like >_> <_< before security approached to forcibly remove him n he grabbed a cookie n crammed it into his mouth in rebellion mid frantic n frankly possessed escape.....

in terms of wht’s going on to this day w his living situation i honestly think he still lives w his mum. i can just see this. KHGFSKGHSFGKSFGH. in like. a ramshackle bungalow in delphinus heights.... having said tht she probably isn’t. there tht often nw she’s dating her latest man (jonas, somehow always sweaty no matter the weather, wears too many gold rings n smells like shoe cleaner) who owns a car dealership n thinks he’s a kingpin for it. still home sometimes tho.

PERSONALITY:

ziggy spends his days working shifts at an ice cream parlour (one he got fired from once bc he broke in high n ate sm ice cream he was lay on the floor in the bk pants unbuttoned stomach bulging sm calling himself garfield saying he had too much lasagna. they hired him bk tho bc he has a harem of middle aged women who lust after him n it brings customers....) or like. cruising parties...... setting off fireworks.... skateboarding...... breaking into abandoned buildings.... filming stupid jackass type tricks....... playing guitar hero...... getting drunk at the arcade..... sometimes busking fr cash in a tossed dwn hat (very badly) (thinks he’s sick at it however)........ or alternatively...... fucking chicks aha...... fuck.......... not exclusive to chicks tho just had to sound despicable bt :smirk: he’s bi Baby.... 

i won’t lie he’s kind of an asshole................ never rly was taught properly how to empathise with ppl so like he struggles w that....... sometimes he’ll say smthn tht’s genuinely just quite mean n doesn’t need to be said but he doesn’t rly realise it’s like bad. n he’s like. what’s the deal haha why are u mad...... 

fuckboy. genuinely jst. rly summarises it well. insatiable. sleeps around wildly. will say he’ll call u back n then will not call u back. lies like oh babe i’m moving to france tomorrow fuckkkkkkkkk sucks so bad that we can only have one night but let’s make it special yeah? tits? n then they’ll see him casually skating past them on the street a week later n be like well clearly he’s not in france. ziggy doesn’t care.

calls himself a “genius inventor” bc he once gutted a vintage analog television n made it into a fish tank. it literally leaked water a bit. still convinced he is a literal visionary never seen before never done again. he’s like i’m on the brink of greatness. i’m the next einstein.

has a bit of a god complex where he thinks he’s the sexiest person in any given room n it’s kind of funny bc like dylan minnette’s sexy to me bt tht isn’t a widespread opinion n ur being a bit bold ziggy...... regardless has confidence thru the roof tht isn’t rly deterred by anything or anyone.....

dyes his hair 49729572459752 colours every colour under the sun. sometimes all at once jst different patches. wears lots of tie dye tshirts n basketball shorts even tho he doesn’t play basketball. rly colourful sneakers. just lots of loud colours tbh. often wears a paper clip in his ear as an earring. pierced it himself. someone probably recorded him doing it fr his insta story. probably was drunk.

drives a vespa around tht is baby blue with pastel yellow polka dots. it has lots of tin cans attached to the back by string like on those cars when u just got married. he did not just get married. u can hear him arriving frm over a street away.

almost never pays fr anything bt is always like “yo it’s my treat” n then either dine n dashes or u have to pay

his idea of romance is nuking a hot pocket as breakfast in bed n then complaining he’s hungry n eating half

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

fuckboy antics: he’s insatiable. rabid. notorious. mayb they fkd n he didn’t call........ jst completely ghosted........ mayb they were genuinely into him n he honestly built up kind of false pretences abt them having a connection n then jst dipped..... cld  b good fr angst n drama <3 someone please egg his house he deserves it <3

high skl heathens: locals tht were equally chaotic in hs..... just picture him having this group of misfits tht were like so loud n always getting up to no good doing god knows what god knows where.... probably gt arrested together breaking into an old abandoned hospital one time........... rly just doing the absolute most at all times............. probably so loud........... drinking n smoking far too much.....

an attempted teenage relationship: i’m like. tentative to even put this one bc i just feel like ziggy wld be a shit bf. KJHGFSHGFHGSFHGFKGHFKSG. but. maybe it ended in drama.....i’d say this wld probably be a girl bc in hs he probably ws less open w his sexuality... maybe ziggy cheated on her or she cheated on him................ angst........ strife.... we love it we love it........ i crash my car into the bridge... i don’t care... i love it... sudden icona pop moment me stood on stage singing karaoke.... it’s just gone 7am as i write this so i apologise if this is losing any. coherency. smiles so sexy....

last adolescent plot i swear: i picture when ziggy was expelled he somehow amassed a large group to protest w signs outside the school fr him to be accepted back. it didn’t work. he threw a party when he received news he hadn’t got back in anyway. maybe ur muse was involved or helped organise this or was violently opposed.

enemies: ppl who just. don’t like ziggy bc like honestly that’s so fair n valid. KJHGFKGHKSFGHSGKHSFHG..... mayb he like. exploded their mailbox one time when they were younger. mayb he skated over their toes. mayb he fucked their bitch aha fuck................. (joking btw) (don’t condone misogyny) (hashtag feminism). cld be fun to play around w

fwb: probably hs a few of these......... mayb they’re cool w things being no strings attached n lax n at ease w ziggy being the mess tht he is in general..... mayb they want more bt ziggy cannot provide...... mayb they literally don’t get on at all n this is their only mutual ground n they keep coming bk to each other.... :smirk:..... whatever u Farncy....

maybe ziggy’s mum dated ur muse’s dad at one point???? we can discuss this if u think it fits..... cld be fun to play around w............

coworkers: past or present r fun..... mayb they were like WTFFF is this guy fking ONNN at a past job (he’s had a few in the food service industry so pretty open in tht area)... mayb they work w him at the ice cream parlour now..... cn discuss the dynamic probably wld be dependent on the muse involved fr like. how he’d act n stuff.... :yum:

#irvingintro #abuse tw #violence tw #believe tht's all....

[olivieblake]

fyi I read this submission on christmas morning and promptly got very emotional so here we go let’s see what happens/if I will weep once again: Congrats on your YA being published soon!!!! It’s so well deserved. You mentioned it came from a place of empathy / community and genuinely you are one of the best people to write it, in part bc ur so freaking talented, but also bc of the warmth that shows in your works, which is… something I vaguely noticed in all your fics but never really could pinpoint until I read Modern Romance this week. ahhhh this is just the nicest compliment, thank you so much, which is a thing I will continue to say henceforth and eternally

Like whether I’m reading about autistic!Hermione’s growth in DfS or Mcgonagall finding love after all those years or loss leading Andromeda to George or Fleur finding freedom/respect/herself after feeling trapped in an unequal marriage with Bill, your words consistently give me a feeling of acceptance and hope, I barely know what to say to this except 🥺🥺🥺 which has been a godsend this year, not only bc of COVID but also bc of realizing I was autistic—and I really, really wasn’t expecting to read such a compassionate yet realistic depiction of autism, like, ever, but esp from a fanfic I picked up for the quality Dramione (and your gorgeous and hilarious writing tbf) as opposed to something I read explicitly for the autism rep 

In fact Divination for Skeptics was almost painful read bc I resonated with everything about your autistic Hermione HARD, even some of the bits with Parvati ringing bells from my childhood—but the way you wrote it felt… really understanding? So that I felt vindicated and seen rather than attacked. DfS felt like a warm, cathartic hug, if that makes sense. I don’t know what it is about your stories and your prose but… they’re just extremely powerful hahah. okay well as I have been saying this is SUCH A COMPLIMENT like seriously the most perfect compliment ever as far as I’m concerned and wow I just will never get over it 

also, I want to add that I have been thinking a lot about ursula k le guin calling harry potter “ethically mean-spirited,” and while it’s difficult for me to explain what that technically meant when she said it (I read the quote sometime last year), I feel like I immediately understood the vibe of what she was saying? there are so many awful people in the potterverse—so much villainy for the sake of villainy—and the more I was writing in that world, the more I realized how little interest I had in looking at the real world as a polarized, black-and-white, “these characters are right and these ones are wrong” kind of place. as I continued to interact with the potterverse I took subconscious steps to erase that aspect, and now, consciously, I rarely write true “villains” in my own books, or I go out of my way to provide side characters and relationships purely for the sake of contributing to the story’s sense of goodness. i recognize that the real world does have people who are cruel because cruelty is easy, or because being corrupt rewards them in ways it shouldn’t or because people do not always get what they deserve, but I think I’ve made the choice to write stories that ~feel~ like the real world might be better than that. I think of all of my stories as an atmosphere/set of emotions to live inside while you’re reading, and I really want that feeling to be love, acceptance, empathy, and respect even when the story itself is about power, ambition, rage, and despair. for me that intangible warmth is a purposeful effort, and for you to recognize and value that is literally nothing short of a miracle ugh I can’t I’m so emotional ahhhhh

On that note I have like 90% of modern romance highlighted bc it’s so freaking quotable/memorable/something I want to keep with me forever; I feel like you’re so talented at weaving together observations abt life, feminism, humor, solid plot and characters, and beautiful prose in such a seamless way. ahhhhhh I just??? how can I thank you properly for this?? pls imagine that I have

But yeah basically thanks for all you do as a writer and for offering so many beautiful works for free!!! Best wishes and happy holidays and CONGRATS on MMR; I’m super excited to read it when it’s out!! happy holidays and happy new year and THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART

#modern romance #divination for skeptics #mmr announcement day #submission

[badatusernames]

CHOJI, SHIKAMARU, LEE, GAARA & HINATA!! ITS A LOT IM SORRY

THANK U FOR THIS...admittedly some answers may be a lil short just so i can like. Get to them all.

EDIT: IDK WHY IT LOOKS LIKE THIS. IM SO TIRED. IM SORRY ITS JUST A LONGASS NARUTO POST ON YOUR DASH I TRIED MY FUCKIN BEST YALL

SEND ME A CHARACTER AND I’LL DO THIS;

Chouji (man i’ve seen it spelled both ways and i’m just used to typing Chouji at this point sorry)

Sexuality Headcanon: Pansexual!!  Gender Headcanon: Cis male A ship I have with said character: SHIKAMARU. SHIKAMARU. SHIKAMARU. SHIKAMARUUUU, my god...just, everything about their dynamic makes my heart melt, the way they’re both people who are easily dismissed by others and how they have such UNFALTERING FAITH in each other. chouji knows how much of a genius shikamaru is, knows very well the fact that despite his laziness, once he commits to something he’s in it for the LONG HAUL, the way shikamaru just believes so steadfastly in chouji, considering him stronger than NEJI FOR FUCKS SAKE...they like. get one another, the kind of relationship where you can be yakking away one minute and then just sitting in contented silence the next. they can just laze around. maybe play video games and snack. and sometimes...kiss. and it’s so chill even with that latent tenderness their later relationship develops and they both just feel so safe and KNOWN and familiar like. love your best friend. anyway everyone slept on shikacho and y’all should be ashamed the naruto fandom is enormous and finding pretty much ANY content for it is almost impossible aside from the small (if lovely and amazing) tag and i’m pretty hyperfixated on it if you couldn’t tell holy SHIT.  A BROTP I have with said character: i’m really not a fan of ino taking potshots at him for his weight and outright shaming him, but once she grows out of that i absolutely love their friendship. listen, you know that post thats like--hold on

thats just them, thanks. A NOTP I have with said character: i have nothing against karui but canon is fucking dead to me and my opinions on p much all the “endgame” ships range from utterly neutral to absolute loathing. their relationship is on neither end of the spectrum, but. eh. definitely not into it. A random headcanon: he keeps nursing injured animals back to health because he’s just that fucking sweet and bringing them back to his house to keep them warm and safe while they recover and his team knows vaguely about this and ino and shikamaru like to poke fun at him for it but since they don’t tend to encounter said animals, it’s not really a huge deal.

of course they stop by his house one day bc he hadn’t shown up for training which is annoying and frankly a little concerning and finding the house mostly empty ino just bursts on into chouji’s room only to immediately have the opossum he’s been caring for latch its little paws on her face and cling.

it’s a bad morning. General Opinion over said character: literally one of my absolute favorites of all time and it really breaks my heart how overlooked he is in the fandom (seriously y’all...). i think kishimoto is kind of a stupid hack and the Fat Jokes are really grating and it sucks to see that so intrinsically tied to his character (like. just let him be fat. jesus christ) but his kindness and overall relaxed, loyal and lovable nature has me just melting. i adore him. 

Shikamaru

Sexuality Headcanon: He’s gay, scoob. (I could also talk a lot about how his earlier misogyny is both a product of being a whiny tween and also some internalized frustration of like WHATS SO GREAT ABOUT GIRLS. UGH. I DONT. STOP TELLING ME IM GONNA FALL IN LOVE WITH ONE ONE DAY DAD JESUS. and let’s be real, thats frustrating, even if it aint an excuse)  Gender Headcanon: he uses he/him pronouns because it’s just what he’s used to and comfortable with but man gender is such a drag... A ship I have with said character: SEE ABOVE SHIKACHO RANT A BROTP I have with said character: naruto! he and naruto have a really adorable friendship and i love love LOVE that he and chouji were shown to be kind and accepting of him even when most people were shunning him. also he’s so fucking dumb i love seeing shikamaru meticulously plan out something only to have naruto shriek into battle and ruin all of it. love those guys. stupid bros.  A NOTP I have with said character: ok. im sorry i just. loathe sh*katema i really do. i haaaate the way kishimoto writes this whole “ew a GIRL” “ew a MAN” vibe with the like OOOH BUT THEYRE GONNA LIKE EACH OTHER vibe like. 

don’t get me wrong i adore them as friends, i think they’re fantastic scathing and witty pals who bitch about anything and everything including each other

but they’re also both gay and kishimoto can suck my nuts byeeee A random headcanon: sometimes pakkun just fucking Shows up and chills with him. shikamaru wants absolutely no part of this but is way too lazy to like. do anything about it so it’s just this guy and a dog sitting in a field chillin and occasionally him piping up like ‘hey kid. remember when i bit your hand? yeah? haha, man time sure does fly.” while shikamaru is just. go aWAY.   General Opinion over said character: if you told 9 year old me watching naruto for the first time my favs were gonna be a three way tie of lee, shikamaru and chouji i never would have fucking believed you but here we are. i love him. i absolutely love him. he’s such a whiny bastard and a really good depiction of burnout genius who doesnt want to do ANYTHING, but his intellect is an absolute DELIGHT to watch. i love him very much. 

Lee

Sexuality Headcanon: he’s pan!! this is a boy that crushes easily and crushes hard on just about anyone!!!! Gender Headcanon: cis male A ship I have with said character: ok i ship him a lot with neji actually? what with how neji grows during the course of the series to regard lee with the respect he deserves is really sweet and there’s just something so infinitely adorable about him going around being the hammiest, most ridiculously earnest, kind and enthusiastic person and neji, now that he isn’t constantly bitter and angry at the world can finally really see that? lee is always happily dropkicking his way into his life, like he wouldn’t have it any other way, and i think that’s just...so sweet A BROTP I have with said character: SAKURAAAAA. oh my GOD do i adore their relationship. ever since lee saved her and basically just gave her a glimpse of his...lee-ness, the fact her negative opinion of him IMMEDIATELY flipped and gave her such a strong admiration and fondness for him kills me DEAD. she always treats him with so much respect and the fact she’s quick to rag on anyone making fun of him melts my HEART!! and on lee’s side, his little crush on her is adorable of course, but the sheer strength of the friendship that comes from it is more than infatuation could ever offer him. i want them to hang out together and talk about their troubles...i want them to make each other laugh and be so very kind to each other...i want sakura to storm over and throw him over her shoulder to TAKE A BREAK ALREADY when he’s been training too hard for too long. god. A NOTP I have with said character: honestly i’m pretty happy with a lot of lee ships! the only ones i view with obvious disdain are the ones with creepy age gaps honestly. A random headcanon: out of everyone in the leaf genin, he’s probably the closest anyone’s ever come to someone who EVERYONE is at least distantly friendly towards. like god have you SEEN how warm and inviting and concerned he is the SECOND he sees that naruto is feeling down? i get the sense he’s immediately inclined to provide that kind of support to any of his comrades, even the ones that Resist it.

you think sasuke is the most popular among the leaf genin? puh-LEASE. everyone looks on rock lee with at least a LITTLE bit of warmth. thats just fact. General Opinion over said character: since my first viewing of naruto he has been my Absolute fav, and while chouji and shikamaru are veeery close to stealing that spot, one look at him and i feel he’s gonna be on top forever. probably the best written character kishimoto’s ever produced that’s remained in  the main cast (tho i dont speak for shipudden onwards who fucking knows, but the truth of it is is i adore rock lee)

Gaara

Sexuality Headcanon: Panromantic Asexual Gender Headcanon: kind of like shikamaru, i feel like he uses he/him pronouns but also doesn’t particularly....Care? A ship I have with said character: ok so it wasnt until my naruto rewatch that i really started falling into this but i think him and naruto are super cute? while i loathe kishimoto for ruining so much abt this show he really is good at creating good foils to naruto, and gaara is no exception--and the way naruto changes his life by just kicking his ass (and proving he’s not just a Simp or smth) and then just, extending genuine empathy and a REAL sense of truly relating to where he’s coming from re:his upbringing? the EFFECT it has on him, bro!!!! my god!!! i feel like they’re that opposites attract ship that don’t clash constantly but instead fall into this adorable synergy and understanding? and i think thats so sweet A BROTP I have with said character: ...is it cheating to just put temari and kankuro here? bc they are literally his siblings but my GOD do i love their relationship. there’s something so deeply sad about their initial situation??? like having siblings that either are deeply fucking afraid of you or clearly don’t care for your well being whatsoever, it’s such a tragic scenario, and the times where they really do show legitimate care for gaara just breaks my heart...but the GROWTH. THE DEVELOPMENT. THE HEALING. i love the sand siblings so much, i am a STRONG advocate of seeing the development from estranged family to loving, occasionally bickering siblings who absolutely Love Each Other A NOTP I have with said character: uhhhh same with lee in that i don’t really mind most of the ships i’ve seen him in? while i don’t particularly ship gaalee i think its also Very Cute, and really it all just seems pretty valid as long as people aren’t being creepy? A random headcanon: i’ve been wracking my brain for one for a good 20 minutes and i just don’t have one he’s such a mystery to me/????? i love him but he is an enigma?? General Opinion over said character: oh my god he’s such an edgelord in the beginning. i’ve been doing a lot of this naruto rewatch with my friend @drashseed (a simply phenomenal fella 10/10 follow him) and every single time he talked the only valid response just became “ok gaara”

but his backstory? utterly HEARTWRENCHING. and his growth is just. absolutely divine, i adore him. thank you mister sandman for doing so much for us all.

Hinata

Sexuality Headcanon: Bisexual Gender Headcanon: cis woman A ship I have with said character: listen. i think kibahina is........Really Really cute. he cares about her so MUCH??? and there’s a certain tenderness to his interactions with her that’s just really evident whenever you see em together? i really love that you get the sense hinata is COMFORTABLE around him!!! like! i feel like hinata really deserves to have a partner who sees her when she ISN’T blushing and stammering? when she’s like? legitimately comfortable and being HERSELF? (dgmw the blushing is adorable i fucking love her but its one of the gripes i have with naruhina that so much of it is just naruto being oblivious and her having a small panic attack) the comfort she and kiba have make for a chill, adorable relationship i just cry over constantly A BROTP I have with said character: so i was GONNA put naruto here, but technically i already put him there for shikamaru’s so i’m gonna say neji!!! uhhh OBVIOUSLY they got off to a. very rough start but the way their dynamic changed (or perhaps in a way reverted back to the times they interacted before neji’s father died and temporarily killed his Human Decency) into this respect and fondness that’s just...such a delight to watch? i’m a SUCKER for slow and mutual reconciliation and there are just so many sweet moments between them. they are FAMILY, BRO!!! THEY CARE FOR EACH OTHER, BRO!!!!!!!!!! A NOTP I have with said character: ...at the risk of sounding like a broken record, i think a lot of hinata ships are quite cute? i guess i’m gonna have to say sasuke. because like.

has. he ever even looked at her. please. jesus christ. she deserves so much better. A random headcanon: she is a LOT physically stronger than she looks!! a lot of her combat techniques rely on taijustu after all so it’d make sense that she puts a lot of effort into physical training alongside chakra control.

i’m trying to say she’s strong. not as strong as sakura but. she can lift her bf up over her head (he’s dying hes dying he’s dYING he lOVES HER SO MUCH). it’s pretty fuckign badass

General Opinion over said character: i LOVE her??? honest to god i really really do--honestly while i dislike the direction they went in canon with her, i really loved seeing her be motivated to grow and change the parts of herself she hated to become a stronger person.

that and she’s so fucking cute and sweet and i just??????? bless her honestly.

#naruto #shikacho #narugaa #nejilee #kibahina #they speak #i cant tag everyone fuck #is this formatting fucked up? i can't tell it wouldnt post before #long post

[ikonist]

this is abt hanbin and ikon so keep scrolling

so i was high a few days ago nd watched a video about hanbin and yun and realized that yun took such good care of hanbin. he always played the ‘hyung’ card on him, teasing him and saying that he loves hanbin all the time, said his ‘mission’ was to make hanbin happy. and that got me thinking that yun must’ve helped -both emotionally and physically- hanbin throughout the years… like,,, hanbin rarely acts childish around the members since he is the leader/songwriter/composer but he does it w yunhyeong bc yun doesn’t mind it.. yun always cooks for him knowing that he was up until late in the studio, avoids waking binie early (but does if he has to), and the other members said this a bunch of times but yun is a great listener so can you imagine the amount of times he listened to hanbin’s concerns and self doubts and never complained abt it cuz he’s yunhyeong lol but those thoughts made me so sad thinking how hard it must’ve been for hanbin these past 11 months without his brothers.

tbh i don’t care if hanbin decides to live his life quietly or just producing songs for himself/his friends. i don’t care if he comes out with a full comeback, mv, etc. i rlly don’t care. the only thing i genuinely care about is if he’s happy doing whatever he is doing, and he seems to be happy these past days, so that’s enough for now. i think i’m past that point of wondering what on earth he is doing, if he’s producing more songs, creating a label, etc, but if i could ask for just one little thing, it would be to show him how much his fans love him; to show him every tweet i see with “i miss hanbin”, “hanbin pics to brighten your day!” or “hanbin compilation” posts. to show him the heartbreaking and incredible edits and posts i’ve seen about him, and how much he is loved. i know that in demo 3 he said “i know i was loved”, but i want to tell him he is loved, still. ikon is loved. ikonics never gave up on them. god, not even one ONE!! hanbin fansite closed, and it has been almost a year. think of kpop idols who lost fansites for even less than that (not that i like fansites that much but the symbolism is there). i’m so grateful that he knows how much we think about him, but every time i feel like it’s not enough. i want him to know that we’ll always be here and he’ll always be in our hearts too. i wish hanbin could see himself thru my eyes and know how kind, talented, heartwarming he is.

sometimes i ask myself if i’m not being too ‘blinded by love’ when it comes to ikon (but especially about hanbin), but then again, what is it about ikon that makes me appreciate them so much? what makes me feel this empathy for them? what is it that when i think of them, i don’t see a boygroup. i see friends who are a ‘chosen family’, who know each other so well and would never give up on their brotherhood. never. how they are totally different people, but learned what being respected and appreciated feels like, and saw how much they could grow if they listened to one another. i’m not saying that they never fought (if anything i’d put my finger on donghyuk cuz hes a capricorn living with an aries ARIES and a capricorn sag dom.. i mean…. i’d throw hands if i were him), but they learned that hierarchy in the group wouldn’t lead them anywhere. in that iheart radio interview where the lady said ‘what is ur secret to have such great teamwork/chemistry’ and they said they don’t rlly have hierarchy and (to me) this is so important for a group like ikon. 

imagine if they never took anything chanwoo says seriously just because he’s the maknae even tho he is one of the most logical members? or what would happen if hanbin had to always act like the leader when he said yunhyeong would be best fitted for that? if bobby got mad at donghyuk for playing with him just because he’s younger and they never developed that friendship? at times like this i thank ikon for being such a down to earth group. they never took anything for granted. they were humble from the beginning and kept being humble, even when they received (a lot) of  awards. in the mma speech, hanbin said ikon was a group who tried to fill an ocean into a teacup, but that only made water spill everywhere, and i think that’s true. ikon was ambitious and had such a big desire to win that it led to so many heartbreaks and tough paths for them. 

i realized once i started (fully) stanning ikon that they make you feel this immensive empathy towards them to the point where i got choked up with tears learning about their hardships. i’m not trying to say that they’re the only group who went/goes thru this; in fact, i don’t believe anyone should be put to what they had to endure predebut until now. the countless times i cried watching videos of them sleeping on the floor on tour, watching interviews/vlives where they said they want to show us what they’ve been working on, watching concerts where they broke down in tears because ‘they just wanted to see us’. it breaks me because ikon are such good boys but they aren’t even allowed to show that.

in that concert where bobby said “please protect us” and hanbin said “please protect me”... that’s what i’m talking about. ikon was always true to us. the concert was in early 2019, so imagine what they’ve gone through in 2013-2015, when they were trainees. god i can’t even wrap my head around to think how much these boys (who at the time were 16-20) suffered in their early days. being called ‘b-list’ idols because they weren’t as good as the other yg groups. having to tour for a year doing two concerts a day sometimes, while preparing for comebacks/recordings. having to use oxygen masks to perform bc they were too tired. but they always put the biggest performances because they know that moment was once in a lifetime for us. 

when ikon won soty in 2019 it was clear to me how much they appreciate what we’ve done for them and how personal the fan/idol relationship is with them. i don’t mean it as in some delulu shit but... ikon knows that we trust them. they know we will always be loyal to them, and that’s why they treasure their fans the most. only ikon knows what they went thru since 2013, but some fans who have been with them ever since are proof that the bond has always been strong. for fuck’s sake even the fan chart for most of the songs “we will protect you ikon / we will care for you ikon / we will shine on you ikon / let’s be happy ikon”. i don’t wanna sound fake deep but ikonics reflect ikon in so many different ways. ikon is loyal, they are caring,  they never gave up on what they dreamed of, even if it seemed unreal. they know what’s like to see the ones you love fall and try to get them back up again. ikon lived so many failures and were SO critical about themselves for not debuting in 2013, trying to debut again in 2015 but not doing so well in charts, not being able to be free. they just wanted to sing. to be with each other. and yet they kept meeting obstacles along their way, but even so they never gave up. and i think that’s kinda what being an ikon fan is about too.

so, as for now, no one is sure about ikon’s path in the future but i can say that even though things might get tough a few months from now, ikon will always be that group for me.

IKON BEST BOYS

#ikon #hanbin #idk im just sad #everything i weird today whats wrooong #is**** #tess.txt #binie #long post

[rosykims]

4, 5, 6, and 8 for miss triss ?

thank u miss mollie !

4. Can they handle blood/gore?

yes she can ! nd thats on desensitization luv 🤦‍♀‍

basically she saw a very Grizzly supernatural occurrence in the woods once as a kid, it fucked her up for life, and ever since then (bc she processed it only the way a classic Weird Girl could) she became pretty obsessed with like. horror and true crime (NOT in the gross way, i swear) and basically wasn't squeamish abt any of that shit bc she'd already had the real thing burnt into her retinas dbfnddnndd

so after she goes away to college/uni/whatever the fuck u need to do to be a Big City detective, she did a few science units and whatnot so she's also seen dead bodies nd the like in an acedemic capacity. it's never effected her too badly except for like,,, very casual feelings of pity. she's actually IS very caring, i swear, she just also happens to be numb psychologically !!! xbxjdksmdnd

5. How are they with people?

ok so she's simultaneously very good w people and also...... quite bad. basically triss is VERY charismatic and charming and endearing and outwardly she's just permanently smiling so its hard not to like her. she is good aquaintances with almost everyone in town and people will always smile and say hello to her when they see her. but as for close friends . . . she basically only has tina and thats it ! and even then tina knows fuck all abt triss's personal life ! verda is on the cusp of becoming a Good Friend too, but triss is very good at keeping people who genuinely care about her an arms reach away. the ordeal of being known is Extra mortifying for her and she hates people understanding her bc it gives them power to reject her basically 😌 she's had people who got close in the past, but she usually ends up getting scared and like. ghosting them lol. she is unknowable ! she cannot be known !

6. What's their relationship to Bobby?

m!bobby is her ex...... L. even more unfortunately, triss still does like him (or, at least amicably tolerates him lmao) and is on pretty good terms with him, at least up until That One Scene in book 2. i like to think they were friends in highschool, when he was halfway decent, and then got together after triss returned from the city. like i said above, triss doesn't rly let anybody in, and so bobby........felt easy for her, because she knew pretty much right from the start that he didnt actually give a fuck about knowing her or understanding her. and that suited her just fine fbxndndnd much to her mother's dismay. basically he was just a convenient excuse to avoid real, genuine intimacy and emotional vulnerability, wig ! rebecca would give her a LOT of talks abt “knowing her worth" "doing better" and whatever but the thing is.... triss knew he was trash ! she was just chill w it bc it meant she didn't have to get too attached lmao. anyway obviously they broke up but their relationship following that is mostly just..... ironic. triss is never mean or cold to him bc shes never mean or cold to anyone, but i guess u could say she's very obviously with the fact that she finds him annoying af. but she also finds him funny so she doesnt mind him being around bc she can get a laugh out of it.

one more thing – triss got kissed by him in book 2 (i picked the 'too stunned' option uwu) but didnt want to go any further with it bc obviously she's hung up on ava. his betrayal after that was probably one of the few times triss's chill persona actually slipped and she could barely hold a smile, could barely keep the anger and disgust from her face, and so i think he rly knew he fucked up bc she NEVER let him get under her skin when they dated. she still cared abt him and was concerned abt him after he was attacked tho. shes a caring gal !

8. What's their relationship with their mom like? How did it change?

her relationship with her mum is very good, but thats because its VERY distant. she doesn't tell rebecca jack shit abt her life, and hasnt since she was a kid. she has a lot of unresolved issues with rebecca but locks them down deep bc.... well. she hates setting boundaries for other people and would rather just ignore it til it goes away. after the book 1 reveal shes....... not rly okay with her mum, but not for the reasons rebecca thinks. the supernatural, the agency, the secrecy, none of that is rly a big deal for triss - she already more or less knew that the supernatural was out there, and like. the government being shady is hardly a surprise dbfhdjdj. mostly the reveal just bought to the surface memories of what she saw as a kid, and how much it hurt her, and she cant stop thinking abt how if her mother – who had the tools to deal w it properly – had just noticed that smth was obviously wrong, she could have helped her. it makes pretending to be fine about things a lot harder for a while, and she comes across a lot more distant than usual. eventually, after processing it, she does find a way to repress it down again, but those feelings are by no means gone and i think theyll come out One day, at some point lmao

#oc: triss #thank u sm for asking !!!!!! #i do have a Potential hc that triss like......deadass got engaged while she was living in the city....... #and then freaked out and called it off and skipped town DBFJDJDJ #she has so many problems...... triss go to therapy challenge 2k20

[zayashmaya]

Gods and Monsters - 4 - Honeymoon (part 1).

Marvus x Reader; SFWish

Other chapters here!

In which the limo becomes the ultimate wingman.

There are violets in your eyes There are guns that blaze around you There are roses in between my thighs and fire that surrounds you It's no wonder every man in town had neither fought nor found you ... 

- Lana Del Rey

You were propped up on Marvus’s lap from the moment the chauffeur closed the door behind him. It was a rather intimate gesture, but Marvus had insisted, and you knew him well enough by now to expect this sort of behavior from him. You even questioned him once about his tendency to always touch you, and he had claimed it was because he enjoyed your warmth, so you happily obliged his cold-blooded yearnings.

Marvus had chosen his singular seat that was strategically placed between a mini fridge and a bartop upon which rested several bottles of faygo. You discretely scrunched your nose as he took a generous chug. Not even the atmospheric tunes playing from the speakers could appease your rising hatred for that drink.

But Marvus mistook your leering for thirst, apparently. “Wanna lil taste?” he offered, jostling the faygo with a slight shake.

Would it be rude to refuse? Would it go against his religion, even? “Is this the same faygo they serve during service … ?” you asked, remembering how Chahut had prompted you to partake in the ritualistic consumption.

“Na b dis ain’t the cheap shit, u gotta try it.”

You hesitantly accepted the bottle, using both hands to tip it up. The cold, acrid nectar electrified your taste buds with its overpowering sweetness. With the amount of sugar and other obscure additives mixed into this noxious concoction, no wonder the purplebloods were prone to sporadic bouts of madness.

The limo rolled over a bump and made you spill some of the faygo from the corner of your mouth. “Damn it,” you muttered, wiping it away with your hand as you leaned over Marvus’s lap to set the bottle down, unaware of his gaze on your lips.

Before you could settle back into place, Marvus caught hold of your wrist. You felt your pulse quicken — was he upset with how you’re conducting yourself, wasting his favorite drink?

Judging by his cheeky grin and hooded eyes, you knew that was not the case.

Your anxiety disappeared instantly, only to be replaced with frozen shock as his tongue darted out to slowly lick away the sticky faygo on the back of your hand.

“Wh — I — Marvus — “

“Can’t let it go ta waste, ya no wat i’m sayin?” he cheekily said as you wiped off his spit on your dress. “So, wat b da verdict?”

God, you still felt the residual chill on your hand from his tongue. It had been so wet and smooth —

“Yo buddy, u gud?”

What would it feel like in other places — 

You snapped out of your wandering thoughts and prayed you weren’t blushing too hard. “Wh — what? Oh, it’s … it’s something, alright,” you meekly replied.

Marvus chuckled. “Don't stress it babe, i can see u ain’t too keen on da wicked elixir. It b written all over your face.”

You smoothed your hands over your cheeks and cursed the heat blossoming forth. “Don’t tease me, Marv,” you whined, turning away from him.

He gently grabbed your wrists and pried your hands away with ease, smiling at your mock pout. “I juss can’t help myself. Look at dat cute redness all over u. How’s a bro supposed to resist makin u flush, ‘specially when i no it’s all for me?"

Revealing one’s blood color to another was considered to be an intimate display of trust, as you’d learned when you first met Vikare. Maybe Marvus was just eager for some reassurance of your friendship? Troll culture sure is confusing.

A short buzz saved you from further provocation. Marvus seemed almost disappointed by the interruption, judging by how his smile fell into a flat line. But he excused himself all the same, busying himself with his palmhusk while grumbling about not getting enough free time.

You were tempted to check out the television, but the remote was cast away on another seat, and Marvus had tightened his hold around your waist while he spoke to someone who might have been his manager. Trapped as you were, you simply leaned onto his shoulder and looked outside, letting the ambient rap streaming from the speakers set the mood.

Through the tinted windows you could make out towering high-rises and neon signs flaring with Alternian government propaganda. A particular sign caught your eye for a brief moment as it passed by — written into a giant billboard in magenta were the words, the revolution will not be televised, because it does not exist.

Marvus snapped his fingers in front of you, prompting you to look up. He was startlingly close, you realized, and you very nearly got lost in those impossibly dark eyes before he asked, “Whachu thinkin abt, babe?”

You regarded him silently.

Here you were, legs propped up over the lap of a dangerous highblood. He had finished with his phone call, grazing his knuckles over the expanse of your leg. Strange, how you felt completely at ease with him, despite knowing what he was capable of. You were not an idiot — Marvus could command thousands of mindless trolls with the same flair of a ringleader in a circus, fanning the flames of crowd-induced mania simply for his own convenience. Blood spilled for his sake, sacrificial lambs led to a euphoric slaughter.

The propaganda sign was still burned into the back of your retinas, a haunting after-image that colored your world a dizzying lime, and you were reminded of Tyzias’s hushed whispers of a caste long-forgotten, lost to the depths of a magenta shadow.

Dead. The limebloods were all dead, as decreed by the Condesce.

Limelight, you thought. The focus of public attention. How ironic.

Marvus would one day have to carry out the Condesce's whims. He was certainly fit for it, having honed his craft as a global superstar. All of his life had been dedicated to his adoring fans, painstakingly perfecting his performances with an avid devotion to not only the populace, but to his very namesake, to whom he was destined to become.

And that is precisely why you pitied him. How different could his livelihood have been, how evolved beyond its empty meaning could it become, if only he could create music for music’s sake. Not for an inevitable life of servitude, forced to use his powers to control the masses.

If only he knew what true freedom meant. Not that your world was perfect by any means, but still, you wondered.

“I was thinking about music,” you replied.

He quirked a brow. “Don’t leave me hanging like dis now, i gots to b knowin wat’s cooking in that funky think pan of yours.”

“Well,” you started, wondering if what you were about to say was considered heretical. “I was just wondering what music means for your people. For my people, it’s traditionally been used for all sorts of reasons, but at its core, music has always been a form of self-expression, rebellion, and spreading messages of awareness. You know, like … problems with our society, and stuff.”

You paused and glanced at Marvus. Nothing about him seemed out of place — except behind his ever-present grin and hooded eyes hid a keen glint of intuitive understanding. “Dont lemme stop u bb,” he said with a wink. “I like to hear u spit sum faxxual truths at me abt alien culture.”

“You’re not going to rip me in half for saying these things?” You knew he wouldn’t, but it was your turn to tease.

Marvus had the decency to look scandalized. “Daaayum, dat hit me rite in the blood pusher,” he dramatically replied, slapping a hand over his chest. “I ain’t never given u no reason to think i’d hurt u!”

You smiled softly at his genuine concern, shuffling around for a moment to bring your knees on either side of his hips. Marvus looked a little out of sorts with your repositioning, eyes roaming over your further-exposed thighs as your dress rode up from straddling him.

“I know you wouldn’t hurt me,” you quietly said, placing your hand over his. “But I’ve been on this planet long enough to know danger when I see it.”

His fingers entwined with yours. “Damn strait, cuz.” He brought your hand up to his lips and gave a quick nip to your fingertips, gently so as to not scratch. You snatched it back with a giggle. “But btwn u and me, i think u’d give me a run for my cas$$shmunny, hunnie.”

“How so?”

He tapped two fingers against your temple. “The danger b all up in here.”

“The only thing dangerous about me is my lack of a brain — er, a think pan.”

“Na don’t sell urself short like dat, i b tellin u dat u wouldn’t have survived without sum street smarts.”

“That’s what I thought in the beginning,” you wistfully said. “Until I started realizing how my life has turned into an endless stream of do-overs. At this point, I’m more inclined to think that there is a higher power watching over me, guiding my way.”

Marvus hummed in answer, short and deep and with a hint of questioning. “Hey babe, lemme axe u sumthin.”

You wordlessly nodded, sobering up from the sudden change in mood. This was, perhaps, the first time you had ever seen him with such a thoughtful look on his face.

“You really believe in the Dark Carnival, sis?” His eyes appeared to flash with each passing lamp post, like a dangerous creature prowling in the darkness.

Long ago, you might have hesitated. Longer still, you might have faked your devotion in favor of friendship. Now, though … now you knew with resounding certainty.

“I really do,” you answered.

“How do u no for a fact?”

“Because I’ve been there.” Marvus frowned and leaned back against his chair. You did not let his skepticism deter you. “I died once, you know. I don’t really remember it, but I know it happened because whenever I’m in church, I can practically feel myself being lifted into another plane of existence. And — and there was a carousel,” you animatedly recalled, each bit of recollection stringing together lost memories until it felt like you were there again. “There were two angels who came to get my body, and there were weird mannequins occupying the other horses on the carousel, and there were paintings of clowns with smiles and frowns … And a purple figure holding something, and there was a lot of red and green — “

Marvus placed a hand against your cheek, and you felt your zealous excitement cool down to a happy daze. “Either u hittin da incense too hard, or dat was a mutherfxxn prophetic vision.”

“I dunno,” you slurred, leaning into his touch. “But it was real, Marvus. It was fucking real, and the only time I’ve ever really felt at peace since I got here.”

“Shiiiiit, lil mama,” he breathed in awe, running his fingers through your hair before grabbing your waist. “I ain’t gonna doubt u no more. If da messiahs deemed u fit for such an honor, then i fxxn bow to u.”

You giggled. “You do that anyway! Since I’m so short, ya see.”

“Yea, short n sweet,” he rumbled low, and you felt his touch run down your sides to end up at your thighs. At this point, you were fairly convinced he had a fixation.

It took a moment to catch up with his words. There you go again with your blushing. “Wh — what are you saying … “ you trailed off, shyly looking away.

“Only truths,” he replied. “Cuz all i see is truths all over u. Your skin b glowin like its covered in sum kinda special stardust n shit. Makes perfect sense tho.” He bared his sharp fangs in a wide smile, his eyes raking up and down your form as you felt his hands grip your thighs a little tighter. “Them leg struts b a muthafuxxin miracle, babe. And that’s a true fact, strait up.”

You felt the gears turning in your head while you processed what he said. Was he … ?

“Oh!” You leaned in towards him and bunched your hands into the fabric of his coat. Marvus craned his neck to bring his face closer to yours — for what reason, you couldn’t imagine — and it almost looked like he planned to close his eyes before you excitedly spoke, “You’re talking about that sparkly powder you guys use during prayer, right? And you use this stardust to pray for miracles, ergo my strut sticks, which apparently even the Grand Highblood approves of. That’s pretty poetic, Marvus. You really have a way with words! Although I guess you have to be, since it’s quite literally your livelihood."

Holy hell were you rambling.

Marvus reared back, eyes wide and mouth pursed in confusion. Whatever he saw in your oblivious face had him soften his expression, a light smile playing on his lips. “Pfft. Yea, lil mama.”

The limo suddenly lurched. You were propelled face-forward into Marvus’s chest, and you were tempted to compare his pecks to airbags, but that was too gauche, even by your standards.

“Sorry!” you squeaked, ready to scoot back to put some respectful distance between you, but his hands found their way around you and held you in place.

This was intimate. This was far more intimate than his usual touchy-feely self. You were frozen in hesitation, a bundle of nerves and unexplored emotions rising to the forefront of your mind. “Marvus … ?”

You couldn’t see his face, but you could feel him. Solid, sinewy flesh pressed against your cheek, cold to the touch and yet pulsing with a living beat.

“Wanna know another fact?” he quietly asked. You slowly nodded, and he continued, “You’re kinda one dense mofo, too.”

Well, that took a turn you were not expecting. Marvus loosened his grip to let you look at him face on. Your nose wrinkled in confusion as he watched you with an amused expression. “What do you mean?”

“Babe. Do i rly gots to spell it out for u? Maybe free-style some sicknasty beats to get dem thots cookin in ur think pan?”

You opened your mouth to speak before closing it to think for a moment. The prospect seemed rather exciting; how many people had the privilege of having this talented troll customize a rap for them? “I wouldn’t turn down a verse from you.”

“ :o) “ He reached out to carefully tuck your hair behind an ear — your heart fluttered — and leaned in to murmur:

”Lover lovin herself all up on me, Luscious hips, all curves and dips, And a burning touch That I just gotta worship like an effigy Ya hear me baby — “

Your hands clenched into fists against his chest.

“Red flushin and rushin like a river that flows I wanna b known how far down it goes."

You felt your breath leave your body.

Marvus finally leaned back to gauge your reaction. God, he was so close, hypnotizing you with those deadly bedroom eyes. You couldn’t look away. “Catch my drift now?”

It was at this very moment that your predicament became utterly, embarrassingly aware to you. “You wanted to pail me this whole time?!”

“Ye ;o) “

“But — but why?”

He furrowed his brows and tilted his head. “Whutchu mean why?"

You felt your cheeks burn as the onslaught of past remarks about your appearance surged forth to the forefront of your mind. “Because I’m not attractive to your kind,” you bluntly replied. “I’ve been compared to a mutated lusus, for goodness sake!”

“Hahaha lol!”

“That’s not funny!” You lightly smacked your palm against his shoulder.

Marvus settled down from his laughing bout, completely unperturbed by your attack. “U ain’t gotta give those muthafxxkas any of ur time or energy. Who gives a damn wat they b thinkin, they ain’t the ones who get to have u at the end of the nite. I like u for ur cute lil booty — “ He shamelessly patted your behind, and you admitted to yourself that it wasn’t an unwelcome advance. “ — and most of all, i fxxks whichu for how chill n funny u are. So don’t be all up and worried bout any of dat. Wouldn’t have u here otherwise.”

It was time for one of your famous, long-winded internal monologues.

Did you want this? Did you feel attracted to Marvus Xoloto?

Hell fucking yes, don’t ask yourself such stupid questions.

With that out of the way, on to the next point of consideration — were you ready to accept his propositioning?

Oh, how badly you wanted to say yes. The urge for friendship had long ago morphed into a consuming hunger for stronger bonds. You had even caved in to your whimsical desires and became rather well acquainted with troll anatomy … except everything crashed and burned right after your romp.

Lanque’s cutthroat critique bore into your heart and grew there like a festering wound ever since that fateful night. As such, you could not help but wonder whether Marvus would find you boring, too. Even worse than that, you wondered whether he was doing this to satisfy some sick curiosity about your body. Just another exotic thing to cross off his bucket list.

You did not want to believe those dark thoughts. Marvus had never treated you badly before — in fact, all evidence pointed to the contrary, that he was genuinely into you. But try as you might, your self-confidence was at an all time low. You were afraid to open up again.

Marvus patiently waited while you chewed on your bottom lip and looked away. As soon as your face darkened, he was there to reel you back in with a tap against your nose. You snapped out of your thoughts and drew your attention to him, afraid to see him irate or disappointed by your silence. Instead, you found him to be his usual smiling self.

“Don’t stress it so hard, cuz. U ain’t gotta do anythin u aint keen on, ya dig? I’ma getchu home like i promised, and we gonna forget dis happened.”

It should have been enough. You should have been happy with his suggestion, eager to put this all behind you and remain platonic friends, because you were still hurting from your last tryst.

So why did you feel bothered?

Marvus pressed a button off to the side of his armrest, and the driver’s voice crackled through a nearby speaker. “Yes sir?”

You were about to miss out on an important situation, your senses told you. And you needed to make a choice.

Some other you chose the sensible route. Some other you would return to your watchtower and never get this opportunity again.

But you were strong enough to push through your doubts, right when it mattered most.

You grabbed hold of his loosened bowtie —

“Sup buddy, we gotta — “

— and yanked him down to your level, smashing your lips against his.

#homestuck #friendsim #hiveswap #marvus xoloto #marvus/reader #marvus x reader #marvus xoloto/reader #marvus xoloto x reader #sfw #fanfic #gods and monsters #not quite bucket time #but get ready