#I'm sick and tired help me

[thevioletcaptain]

i genuinely don't care how good a piece of ai generated art or writing looks on the surface. i don't care if it emulates brush strokes and metaphor in a way indistinguishable from those created by a person.

it is not the product of thoughtful creation. it offers no insights into the creator's life or viewpoint. it has no connection to a moment in time or a place or an attitude. it has no perspective. it has no value.

it's empty, it's hollow, and it exists only to generate clicks (and by extension, ad revenue.)

it's just another revolting symptom of the disease that is late stage capitalism, and it fucking sucks.

#''but i just want to use it to--'' don't care! it's shit! stop fucking feeding it! #if you need help generating ideas or jumping off points then join an artist or writer group online #talk to people #make connections #that's what art and writing is supposed to be about in the first place #i'm mad as hell etc. #so goddamn sick and tired of seeing ai shit get passed around on here #it's bad enough in general but every time i see more of it showing up #tagged as fan art or as fic #the angrier i get #heartfelt imperfection in art and writing will always ALWAYS be worth more than the most technically ''perfect'' ai generated image or text #fandom problems #ai generation algorithms die in a fire challenge 2k23 #just a heads up that i'm muting this post and will no longer see responses to it #because i'm tired of seeing dogshit takes from jackasses who want to ''debate'' me #there's no debate you're in the wrong on literally every level and you can die mad about it

[theloveinc]

I am in love with the idea of sugar daddy bakugou, he would have to physically drag me out of bed to class, I set like 5 alarms and then still not go

IT'S ABSURD, like you can't even lie to him abt it either because he has your whole schedule memorized!! You think you've finally gotten away with missing one morning class just to sleep in and cuddle, but NOPE, after one hit of the snooze button he's pulling off your blankets and flickering the lights on and off.

You're like, "can't i just be your housespouse, stay home and do chores???"

And he's frowning, "first you were beggin' me for tuition, now you don't even wanna go???" (i'd immediately get up to argue with him but that's another story)

He is so annoying lmfao. Has an argument for all of your complaints, and will try to slap your butt if you don't get up. And the worst part is that he really does want you to do well !!! and get a degree in case you need to support yourself ever. Good LUCK not feeling guilty and trying to get out of homework, too.....

(and LITERALLY ME THIS MORNING, my alarm rang for an hour and apparently i just did not give enough of a fuck to notice😭😭😭)

#bakugo #youre like 'but i'm tired!!' and he's like 'you got an extra hour of sleep bc i drive you now' #you're like 'my bags not packed!!' and he's already packed it for you (poorly but still) #got dam!!! #it is funny tho the one time he does let u skip and u tell ur prof ur sick #only for them to see you on the hero billboards instagram with him #anyway was thinking abt this on the way home and i thought abt that one 'i'm tired of this grandpa!!' #you when he gets a peak at your notebook and starts trying to explain stuff to u #HELP ME PLEASE #thats u on the phone to kiri #hope this was an ok answer! #caitie things #anon #gen

[disposal-blueeee]

VARGASTOBER - day 2 : johnny c.

#vargastober2023 #vargastober #GUYS GUYS GUYS COME BACK COME BACK I DID THE ART COME B #nny #johnny c #jthm #oh no !! he's dead !! #johnny the homicidal maniac #man i was FUCKING DYING #i'm sick . ughhhhh #i already took a pill and now i feel better though #i think this is the first time you guys see me draw nny :0 #great message on the shirt . thanks ! #le copié a emily con eso de la escala de colores a blanco y negro y me funcionó . gracias emily . (tqm) #i'm so so so tired i feel like i'm gonna pass outtttttt #anyways . SCRIABIN'S NEXT ! #and this time i WILL FINISH IT ON TIME ! #hopefully ... i still feel like i'm dying . #a este sí le eché ganas (crying) #help me guys breathing feels spicy #also a little thing that happened #i was pretty sad because i had to give my friend's tablet back bc he needed it #and without it i can´t draw in ibis paint #i like ibis paint because it has a lot of pretty brushes #and then i opened sai and i had the prettiest brush ever there ?? waiting for me to use it . #soooo uhhhh #vargas #zarla s #vargas zarla

[cinnamon-phrog]

I feel too sick to sleep right now, everything's' too cold or too hot and I can't even breathe without thinking I'm gonna throw up

#it's because i've been drinking diluted juice #i swear the shit they put in that makes me delirious with fever #ughhhh so sick wish a nice big strong mechanoid could help me rn :( real shame #gonna drink water till the middle of the night. there goes my plans for a better nights' sleep :< #i do genuinely feel awful and i have been feeling so for a while and it's all my own doing. not eating healthy. stressing out and barely- #-sleeping. i have stretch marks from losing weight and circles under my eyes. everything's fuzzy. i keep forgetting basic things. #i'm worried about my future. i'm too disabled to function with a job but not disabled 'enough' just because i can speak 'clearly' #i've got no irl friends or family to fall back on. i can only travel so far and i get meltdowns far easier now #months ago i was treated like a pet. now i'm an adult before i ever got to be a child. #i want to be held. be loved without even having to say a word to each other. not even by an f//o but by someone who'll be willing to love m #but all i am now is sick and hungry and hot and cold and tired and awake. #i can't imagine how much worse it is for other people though. i've seen awful images and they're not even a taste of how terrible it is #i worry i won't be able to afford food in the future. or have a stable flat or apartment. that social services will let me down again #this year was meant to be a break but i'm constantly worrying about the time i become 18. my autism and lack of any social life- #will impact me and i'll be fucked over easier than ever. and that happens often #college brought me panic attacks where i'd physically harm myself till i got migraines in front of people and they didn't bat an eye #i could be kicking and screaming and begging for help but they'll just ignore me or infantilise me

[disdaidal]

I wanna thank my irl friends who follow me here and also my beloved mutuals as well as followers who still send me kind messages and try to interact with me and my stuff even if I'm bad at doing it myself.

Honestly, things haven't been that great with me lately, so... it means a lot to me. Honestly. <3

#personal #i had to make the tough decision to drop out of school last week #i didn't exactly want it if i'm being completely honest here #but certain stuff was preventing me from getting further so i knew the teachers are gonna ask me to quit over at our teams meeting #i instantly contacted my nurse about my situation. and she got me a doctor's appointment which was yesterday #where i kind of broke down a little. not because she didn't grant me the sick leave i thought i was going to get #after feeling down and sleeping terribly for weeks #but because she actually *got me*. like. she actually listened to me and figured out some stuff and told me that #what i'm going through and what i've been going through for years would make anyone depressed #so i couldn't help but cry a little because yeah. i'm so tired of never being enough no matter how hard i try #because my brain's wired a certain way and it makes me slow and kinda clumsy and inattentive at times #which. you might guess is not ideal at today's work environment. or studying-wise even #so instead of granting me sick leave (she did say we can change that at anytime though) she told me to wait for that phone call #from the unemployment office. which i should be getting tomorrow. or well. later today #and talk to them about this. to see if they can offer some solutions. or if we can figure something out #'cause i'm getting closer to my 40s and not getting anywhere and it's wearing me out and tiring me out #because i clearly can't help myself or change my ways on my own #i managed to get some work last week though. at the local youth house. one shift though but money still #but i haven't been getting those offers a lot during the past few months so it's not enough to support me obviously #so i definitely need something else. and i hope i can get help. that someone could help me #i should finally get tested for adhd next month too. i don't know if i even have it or if it's gonna change anything but #at least i'd know #anyway i needed to get this off my chest. cause i'm kinda crying a little bit even now just thinking about this whole thing #sorry

[theethlezprincez]

throwback to the hospital😭

thank god i don’t have that stupid feeding tube anymore lol

the way that thing ALWAYS went of or went of by the girl next to me😭

i have to go there next month so that they can weight me and IMPLEMENT SO SCARED HELP

i don’t want to go back there like ever lol

#mentally tired #sick and tired #ana is my friend #ana miaa #i'm so fucking tired #tw mia #actually mentally ill #tw m14 #m14 #tw ed implied #ed dairy #edmeme #tw ed but not sheeran #m14blr #4narex1a #4n4memes #b/p tw #tw depressing thoughts #tw b/p #tw ed sheeran #@tw edd #4n0rexic #4n4rexia #4n4m1a #tw m1a #pro for me not for thee #send help #mental health #tw sui ideation #tw 3d vent

[sexiestsex]

i know it depends what you're resting from and all that but I'd really like to hear about it! I feel like I'm running against a wall with all my strategies and everything I'm trying is counter productive and leaves me more stressed and in pain. So i just want to know what helps other people.

Please give me your How To Have Energy.

#Disability #Actually autistic #Mad pride #Sick and tired of myself and of being sick and tired #Chronic pain #Abled people are allowed also I just often find disabled input more helpful #I may just need to sleep....... #Here's the thing. I think what makes me feel good and what is good for me are different. I feel good being with my friends #But I think it's also exhausting and I need rest? From that? Also??? I do not want to tho? #Maybe i need to unmask more #Idk #Dissociation #I'm so foggy

[hazmatazz]

i'm uninstalling this app for now

#sorry if i don't respond to you on tumblr or through discord i'm not doing well mentally nor physically (sick 😖) #so i'm just exhausted and i think avoiding tumblr might help idfk???? #i'm just so tired of everything so whatever. in the relatable words of hot freaks i just want to be absent #whatever. if you wanna talk to me find out my discord through one of my closer mutuals or something. ✌️ peace #springtrap voice i'll always be back 👍 #babble

[bookishtheaterlover7]

Went over to blea74s page and she did bad mouth you with capt about being awful kids //

Anon you are an awful kid! I didn’t see them saying about Books blog.

Thanks, N🫶nnie. For clarifying.

But again, so tired of all this back and forth. And I can't bring myself to care about what she and others did or didn't say.

Damned if I do, damned if I don't... Just wish it didn't come with drama...

#An🫶n asks #An🫶n to An🫶n #booky reacts #booky answers #chris evans #chris evans fandom #Team Chris #special shout-out to the very first Anon to call me a racist which lead me to where I am today #a messy Fandom that's a shell of what it once was... #don't even know if I should post fics anymore if people are gonna say that “I'm obsessed and need mental help” because I write fics #scenarios that live in my head #I'm just sick and tired of all the drama #something that comes with being a part of this Fandom #man I need to rejoin the more obscure Fandoms again 😅 #at least they aren't toxic

[non-un-topo]

Talking to my sister can be one of the most aggravating experiences

#just allowing myself a few moments of self-pity today #because i'm a little overstimulated/sick of people talking AT me #i have begun to notice that i'm never asked anything... not a single thing. no questions about my life or interests or how school is going #no questions about my partner or our anniversary and no acknowledgement of the big haircut i just got #no questions about my BIL's wedding. none about my health. #every day it's just people talking AT me. kind of tired at the moment... #and this is made worse by my sister's holier-than-thou attitude about literally the smallest and most insignificant things #like washing clothes? and cooking rice?? idk she talks like a housewife now. #and i get to listen to her complain about her 35 year old boyfriend and not say ONE kind thing for 2 hours straight #not a single question for me. not a single nice thing. and i'm talked over constantly #it's not like i don't raise my voice or speak my mind lol #it's just that. between my family and my partner's family. it feels like no one knows just how smart i am and how much fun i can be. #my partner is perfect in so many ways. my best friend and the kindest and most compassionate person i know. #but i really could brag and boast like my sister does over absolutely nothing. because i have actual achievements. but i don't #because who does that lol. fucking annoying and rude people. #maybe my family just thinks i'm okay and so they never ask me anything or call me. ever. #but see.... i don't talk to them because i want advice or help or money. i talk to them because they're my family #and i would very much like to feel cherished and loved by them #/ end angst and self-pity boo hoo

[sga-owns-my-soul]

as someone who has been misdiagnosed at best and fully ignored and not believed at worst about my health issues, it's really frustrating when people tell me i don't really have something unless a doctor has diagnosed me. doctors don't believe i have any issues to begin with, why are they supposed to be trusted over me?? like i get they have degrees but idiots get degrees literally all the time. idk it's just really frustrating when i tell people i have food sensitives and they don't believe me unless i can procure an allergy test. i tell people i have chronic pain and unless a doctor told me that, it doesn't count. i'm not allowed to identify as autistic until a doctor tells me i can. like i get looking something up once isn't the same as a medical degree but idk can we maybe just. stop pretending doctors are the only ones capable of telling what's wrong with someone? can we maybe trust that sometimes people do actually know what's going on with their body and their health?

#and there's also the whole thing about like #insane amount of ableism in health care #i can keep a full time job so clearly i don't have any health issues #my anxiety isn't debilitating bc i can deal with it most days (ignoring the days i can't breathe and i get severe chest pain) #my back pain doesn't prevent me from moving so it's not real (ignoring the times it does stop me from moving bc it's so bad) #i can still sometimes eat food and i'm not Eating Wrong so i don't actually have digestive issues #like i'm just. i'm so tired #i don't even bother going to doctors anymore #bc it just gives me anxiety and stress and they never help #i've seen so many and they all just brush me off #i just. i'm so sick of this #can we stop needing access to a whole history of medical records to believe people have health issues #can we just. not be assholes #please #im so tired #chronic illness #not stargate

[todayisafridaynight]

This might not be anything, but while writing about your fics, the way you have the characters' mannerisms down PERFECTLY got me thinking about mirroring...

There's a lot of it in 7 (Horii is a directorial genius etc etc), most of it more intentional than these probably are, but there's something so interesting about mirroring that takes the tone of a (relatively) fond memory, a familiar gesture, and inverts it in the way shown here.

OH I'M GLAD YOU'VE NOTICED THESE TOO I think I mentioned it months back (or I drafted a post 'bout it but didn't think it was anything noteworthy) but I always really did like how the Arakawa Family mimicked each other's mannerisms (also circling back to how Jo and Masato calling Ichiban 'Ichi' presumably after picking it up from Arakawa)!

Aoki actually does the same sitting gesture too! I went back to double check and skim through the rest of the game's cutscenes, and as far as I could tell unless I skipped a scene, it really is only these three that do this specific pose:

It's such a small detail but I love it immensely and it really does highlight their connections with each other and it drives me insane

#snap chats #the fact aoki holds his left fist with his right like jo..... im gonna be sick... (crying) #potential hints that aoki really does favor jo and/or spends more time with him... or i might be delirious. could be both even.. #focusing on how jo mimics arakawa though i dont think i have to say i love how it is inverted intention wise #like of course in arakawa's situations he's in a position where he's helping ichi and speaking calmly with him #while with jo Evidently each interaction is more tense and antagonistic #really is a cool way to emphasize that whole 'step parent' angle if that makes sense #OH BUT THANK YOU ON MY WRITING that's a huge compliment: i'm glad you think i have their mannerisms down ! #accuracy is a big thing to me... in case we haven't picked that up yet.... i should relax a little tbh-- #BUT i'd like to think my brain's good at visualizing things and i think i've 'studied' enough to get an acceptable result in what i show #it's like... if i can't see it in my head clearly or it doesn't look right then i wanna keep trying until it DOES look right yk #dont want a Hello Kitty Wouldnt Do Xanax moment... only on occasion.... a lil xanax wouldnt hurt as long as its not too far gone ☠️ #alright im. DELIRIOUS. #to end this off i watched the first episode of Sailor Suit and Machine Gun ! #my japanese is. HORRENDOUS BUT the art of inference and context clues and stray knowledge got me through it #i'm excited to watch the next episode even if i'm only really getting half the impact from the dialogue #BUT THE FEELING'S THERE... the emotion's there #embarrassingly i almost cried when izumi was crying in the theater over her dad while she was eating cause like Girl Me Too ☠️☠️ #ill go one day without mentioning my dad i promise... todays not that day tho ☠️ #IN ANY CASE. thank you for droppin the episodes on me !! i can't stress never tiring of having new things to watch #ill watch the next episode tonight probably. i was gonna go out to get lunch buuuut my moms home #so there goes that plan.. at least my bro got me food while /he/ went out today lmao

[chirsu]

Page Five of When I Say No, I Feel Guilty by Manuel J. Smith, Ph.D. that I bought at a thrift store.

I am using the cut-up technique and going page by page.

#dave.txt #she speaks #poetry #self help books #When I Say No I Feel Guilty #Cut-up technique #coping #depression #This is about being discharged from the mental hospital when we were 14 and returning to school #And not being able to heal because we were too embarrassed to open up to our friends about the reality of our mental state #We were too busy thinking about how we must be overreacting. #Silently trying to piece ourselves together like a puzzle because we're afraid of using the wrong words and getting called fake #And for years we doubted our transness because we couldn't.. Tell if we were faking it for attention. Bc that's what it always feels like #It all feels so fake because every detail about ourselves feels like a grab for attention. #Just thinking about being depressed felt like we were making a mockery out of ppl who were actually depressed and suicidal #I'm sorry for being so emotional about this piece. For trauma dumping. I'm also sorry if you're reading this. And sorry that I was scared. #I am okay I'm just really tired. Tired of being sick. Being sick makes me cry. I feel so useless. Like a lump. #I am curling up in embarrassment #dear diary #vent

[astriiformes]

Someone put a curse on my family this year for real I am holding my head in my hands I have no idea how to fix any of this anymore

#tiny sister is having a rough time but also lashing out at everyone else about it and making some choices she might regret #and i am in another state and dying #all this on the heels of my dad's very scary surgery stuff #and my. well [gestures] #i am so tired folks i feel like if i don't intervene this is only going to get worse. but i don't know what to do or how #we don't even know where she is right now! apparently!! #and no one thought to tell me until like! yesterday! even though it has been days!! #sometimes being the sibling that moved away sucks so bad!!! #feeling sick and terrible and like i need to cry for a few hours maybe except i don't know if that will like. help #i'm so worried about her #2023 end already challenge #this has been one of the worst years i've (barely) lived through and it's only halfway over. hate that

[theethlezprincez]

thinking about my ex from a couple years ago really makes me want to kms

i could have been way better to her if i wasn’t such a fuck up i swear

i wish that the plan she had to make us a house got further then just thoughts

i miss her silliness

i do not miss the abusive part of that relationship that came from both sides

i wish i could just talk to her and say that i will not get her of my fucking mind

i wish she would’ve been next to me back then

i wish that she could just know how fucking much i loved her.

she was the only reason that could have made me want kids but the kids would have very fucked up parents lol

i hope that she is okay and that she has healed from the shit she dealed with back then

i love you T

#mentally tired #sick and tired #i'm so fucking tired #actually mentally ill #mentally exhausted #ex partner #wlw vent #very confused #fucking help me #god help me #fypシ゚viral #i miss her #mentally fucked #bpd vent #actually bpd #bpd thoughts #bpd safe #bpd fp #bpd #bpd problems #bpd feels

[bootyful-seventeen]

i am too mentally exhausted to even deal with this shit anymore with my mom and grandma and low key wish i'd go comatose for a few years to be left alone tbh

#had a clean up service come by to see the damage and give a quote on the estimate and my grandma wasnt having it #she got upset and started crying to them about she has only 1 daughter and is trying to help her and they're trying to tell her that keepin #all that junk isn't gonna be helping anyone especially my mom but she wasn't getting it and i said i'm not helping clean the junk that's #all around the house cuz i'm tired of it all and having to manage my emotions since i am for sure emtotionally stunted from my childhood #and have to deal with a schitzophrenic mom and an absent sister who's balls deep in denial while i'm struggling to find a job here #and my grandma always stressing me ot saying she's gonna kick me out isn't fucking helping here at all like she thinks it does #so when they left she spent all day sobbing on the phone how i'm a terrible granddaughter who wants to throw out good stuff #when i'm not gonna keep helping sell shit for my mom cuz my sister can do it as her family contribution since she did nothing since dad die #and the thing is i gave them all options on clearing shit out cuz i know this family by now and shit doesn't get tossed but it migrates #cuz i said months ago i can ask some friends if they could come down and help sort and declutter #grandma said no to that and said she'll kick me out if i do it and she didn't want to pay for my mom's shit to get moved into a storage uni #she leaves the clean up to my mom and i think the backyard got worse but she didn't call anyone to throw out the junk like she threatened t #so i call a fucking hoarders clean up service cuz that's what my family is on my mom's side at this point and the city will be called too #and she has this reaction cries all day and calls everyone to say i'm horrible and yells at me saying i'm the one killing her with stress #when she's already been doing that for months to herself when i'm just tired and possibly mildly depressed or something idk #i barely leave my room and don't go outside except to walk my dog but idk cuz my family's attittude was we don't go to doctors cuz #cuz they're for crazy people but of course it's gotta switch up for my mom and no one else and i'm just sick of it all #grandma doesn't accept free help and she won't accept help that i pay for myself with my money set aside for school so i'm done #unlike her when i say i'll do something i stick to it so i'm not doing shit anymore unless i can call a friend to help with this mess #it's gonna sound like such a horrible thing but i can't wait for my family to die so i can live in a clean home again and get help #like deep serious help cleaning and big time grief councelling cuz i barely had time to process my dad's death and being the one to find hi #and that was just this february like god i am going to need so much fucking therapy in my future it's almost rediculous #and probably say screw my mom's side and visit my dad's side a lot more since they seem to be the normal ones in this shit family tree #at least they're not stupid and leave junk everywhere where one neighbour getting sick of not being able to sit outside and enjoy their yar #without mountains of junk staring them right in the face and landing a notice from the city to clean up especially since #we have chainlink fences and at least 7 neighbours can see the backyard and everyone can see the front porch when passing by #i'm just tired of living in these suffocating households and even wanna file a report myself to kick them into gear #its horrible living like this and no one should live surrounded by junk and things they never use or even garbage