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#What heck even makes a meme anyways
toast-the-unknowing · 26 days ago
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first lines
tagged by @emmerrr​ and @flightspath​, thanks!
rules: list the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). see if there are any patterns. choose your favorite opening line. then tag 10 of your favorite authors!
I’m including lil ficlets because why the heck not. Under the cut for length:
Ronan hadn't meant to drop his hand over the side of the boat. (rascals and scoundrels, villains and knaves)
“Whose turn is it to deal with asshole regulars,” Adam asks, “yours or mine?” (garden ficlet)
“I’m not going to smile.” (photo studio ficlet)
“You’re going to get a sunburn.” (beach ficlet)
Declan goes on the date, because what damn choice does he have? (not to put too fine a point on it)
“You’re not a dragon.” (high fantasy ficlet)
“What’re you in for?“ (arrested ficlet)
“Don’t know why anyone else is even here,” Ronan mutters after the fourth or fifth time he has to dodge to avoid running into someone. (aquarium ficlet)
“You haven’t posted a new video to the channel in three weeks.” (youtube ficlet)
“Would you say Sacrifice is what defined you?” (the mess you left when you went away)
The living room is empty when Adam comes home from work. (the years to come, the years behind)
Ronan gets a text from Adam on Friday afternoon. (we’re making the best of this world)
Ronan would love to say that he's paying attention when he runs into his soulmate, that his words were deliberate and well-chosen. (if love if just a game (then how come it’s no fun))
Gansey is beginning to think the AirBnB was a mistake. (hold me back, I don’t wanna be a drag)
"I found this in your refrigerator." (sailed my ship of safety ‘til I sank it)
“Fuck.” (sings the tune without the words)
They’ve been dating for one week, no matter what Ronan says about it, when Ronan takes him on a tour of the neighborhood. (our hearts are just made out of strings to be pulled)
"Howdy, pilgrim." (talk low, talk slow, and don’t talk too much)
Adam watches Ronan dance around the words I love you for a month before he says them. (like a moonlight mathematician I subtracted my concerns)
It's one of those dreams that tries to trick Ronan into thinking he woke up, but it's not very convincing. (loosen up and lose your mind)
Thoughts:
I was all prepared to go off my last 20 fics period, not limit it to Raven Cycle, and then my last twenty were all Raven Cycle anyway. Though if I hadn’t included the ficlets from that meme a little while back I think my Six of Crows fic would’ve snuck in there
Lots of dialogue without context (or even attributed speaker) as an opening sentence
Lots of SHORT sentences as an opening sentence
Tricking readers into thinking I don’t write torturously long sentences for my own fun with zero consideration of them or of punctuation, I suppose
I was set to blame this trend on that ficlet meme -- I noticed I was doing lots of short dialogue openings and kind of leaned into doing it on purpose -- but the trend continues on into other works, too
I think 16 takes the cake for this category of opening sentence
I actually prefer when the opening sentence manages to pack a lot of context in, versus the “here’s a line of dialogue dropped on you from out of nowhere" -- which, to be clear, I also think is fun, but getting a lot of information in, about who our POV character is, what their emotional state is, what’s happening, what the tone of the piece is going to be, while still being interesting and intriguing, that I think makes for the strongest opening sentences. But, obviously, harder to pull off.
On those merits, I think 5, 14, 17, and 19 are my favorites on the list.
this is already long and I’ve tagged people in something else today so I’m gonna hold off except to say, play if you want to! 
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gooseras · 26 days ago
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The Not So Scary Haunting of Sarawat Guntithanon— Chapter 1
Fandom: 2Gether
Pairings: Sarawat/Tine
Summary: Sarawat Gay Panics 24/7 over his new roommate (who, by the way, might be a ghost, which is weird on so many levels but whatever, if a man wants to thirst over the supernatural being haunting his apartment so be it!)
Word Count: 1621
Notes: i'm not even excited for 2gether the movie yet here i am, posting another sarawatine fic. basically our boy Sarawat gay panics every single minute of every single day because the ghost who is haunting his apartment is pretty. that's it. that's the plot. just sarawatine being dumb, mutually pining idiots.
Read the first chapter on Ao3 or down below!
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How was it possible that a disembodied voice could sound so... god damn enticing and lovely? At first, Sarawat found himself pressing his body deeper into his bed but after getting over to his initial shock and fear he allowed himself sometime to appreciate the sound of it. Although his heart was in his throat, Sarawat could not deny the wave of comfort that filled his veins, from his finger to his toes warm spread through his body.
Which was weird—and frankly crazy. Ghosts can possess people, right? Or kill them? Sarawat wished he paid more attention to all the horror movies Man and Boss dragged him to because maybe then he wouldn’t be laying in bed, already whipped, ready to drop down on knee. Hand in marriage sir, please give me your hand in marriage.
He should be terrified of this figure, not lowkey turned on.
Curse Sarawat and his inability to function around attractive boys. Curse this motherfucking hot as heck ghost and his stupid dimples.
Sarawat awakes to a blurry and translucent figure hovering mere inches from his face.
The next day he swears to Man and Boss that the reason he remains frozen was because of fear and not because he was having a full on gay panic attack... over a ghost. That’s what this person was, right? A ghost? He was a rationale adult but he had enough brain cells to connect all the dots.
Sarawat sucks in a deep inhale of breath, allowing his eyes to burn every line, curve, and dip of this mysterious figure's face.
The dim light of his bedroom combined with the near translucent nature of the figure meant that Sarawat never was able to get a clear idea of what this ghost looked like. Just the glimpses he did get left his throat dry and heart pounding rapidly.
The figure had a closed mouth smile etched across his features, all soft pink lips and crinkly eyes and dimples. Sarawat briefly thought of leaning forward to press his fingertips against those pink lips just to see if they were as soft as they looked. But then he realized that was insane and weird so instead he just beat that thought away with a stick. Gay thoughts: be gone! Don’t you dare become a simp over a motherfucking ghost.
The bottom half of his face was crystal clear which was both a blessing and curse while his top half looked as if it was about to flicker away at any moment. Sarawat was positive that this was abnormal, but then again this was his first encounter with a ghost so maybe it was, in fact, normal? It’s not as if he was given a manual or anything.
He couldn’t quite tell what shade of brown this mysterious figures eyes but he allowed his brain to imagine that it was probably vivid, just like the rest of his face. He was debating on the actual shade when he a disembodied voice spoke.
“Hello.”
How was it possible that a disembodied voice could sound so... god damn enticing and lovely? At first, Sarawat found himself pressing his body deeper into his bed but after getting over to his initial shock and fear he allowed himself sometime to appreciate the sound of it. Although his heart was in his throat, Sarawat could not deny the wave of comfort that filled his veins, from his finger to his toes warm spread through his body.
Which was weird—and frankly crazy. Ghosts can possess people, right? Or kill them? Sarawat wished he paid more attention to all the horror movies Man and Boss dragged him to because maybe then he wouldn’t be laying in bed, already whipped, ready to drop down on knee. Hand in marriage sir, please give me your hand in marriage.
He should be terrified of this figure, not lowkey turned on.
Curse Sarawat and his inability to function around attractive boys. Curse this motherfucking hot as heck ghost and his stupid dimples.
Sarawat was like ninety percent sure of his sexual identity but now he was having a crisis about the fact he was possibly crushing on a whole new species. Needless to say he was losing his mind!
He could just imagine the headline of the video Man would inevitably make him sit down to film and post on their jointed YouTube channel.
STORYTIME: I ALMOST MADE OUT WITH THE GHOST THAT'S HAUNTING MY APARTMENT!
Sarawat was positive that his best friend would insert various memes and jokes throughout his very honest and real existential-slash-moral-slash- philosophical crisis Sarawat was having.
It would probably rake in a lot of views but Sarawat did not want to be known as That One Guy Who Simped Over A Ghost for the rest of his life.
He was almost positive that if he told his friends the trust extent of how he felt, they would want to change their channel from music and vlogs to something more akin to Buzzfeed Unsolved.
They would buy a spirit box and Ouija board online and force Sarawat to try to communicate because of course they fucking would, those absolute menaces.
He could already see Boss glancing around like a conspiracy theorist, seriously asking the ghost are you DTF (that means down to fornicate in case you need clarification), Mr. Ghost? Just give us a sign, any sign. Man would most definitely feed into this or make the situation even worse.
Which is why he was not going to reveal what happened tonight. He would just play off as sleep paralysis. Yeah. That is the best way to prevent his best friends from blowing this situation out of proportion.
Sarawat wanted to say something but the words died in his throat. What would he even say? Hello. Please smash your face against mine! Uh, no way in hell. Maybe it was a good thing that he had trouble forming words right now. It would save him a lot of embarrassment.
The figure leaned down closer and— fuck fuck fuck gay thoughts go away— peering curiously down at Sarawat. “He definitely can see me so why isn’t he saying anything?”
Because you can’t verbally keysmash in real life you beautiful and vaguely threatening supernatural being.
The figure hummed, deep in thought, before leaning back (thank goodness) only to do something that made Sarawat let out a very unflattering shriek in surprise. Well there goes his reputation. He didn’t have one in the first place to begin with, especially not with this ghost, but still. There it goes.
Ghosts were unable to touch people right? Right? So why did a ghost...just touch him?
Sarawat raked his brain trying to remember the drama he watched a few months back with his brother (it was Phukong unsubtle way of being like, hey, bro, I like boys but I’m still scared of coming out so let’s just both pretend like I didn’t just cry at the scene where Ohm Pawat’s character comes out to his mother, I swear I’m emotional because of the acting not because I can relate to it).
Sarawat was positive that the ghost in that drama couldn’t actually touch anyone. He was like ninety-six percent sure that every time he tried his body would just go straight through the other characters.
He forgot how it was possible that the ghost could touch, and kiss, the human, though. He should have paid more attention but hey, he was also trying to think of an inconspicuous way to let it slip that he was also gay. Great (disaster gays) apparently think a lot alike.
Anyways, the figure poked his chest and Sarawat almost pissed his pants in shock. Clearly the ghost was just as surprised that he could actually touch Sarawat because he froze, making Sarawat happy that he decided to wear a shirt to bed tonight.
He assumed that the ghost must have thought he was dreaming to (wait can ghost dream?) so just to make sure he poked Sarawat three more times in the same spot and yup—Sarawat felt it. He felt it clear as day.
“Oh.” The figure tilted his head to the side. “This is weird. I shouldn’t be able to do that.”
Yeah, obviously.
Sarawat opened his mouth to finally speak (he swore he was going to play it cool and be all like: hi! i promise i’m not having gay thoughts right now!) but before he could a loud crash in the next room made him jolt in surprise.
After being rendered motionless for a few minutes, Sarawat finally gained control of his own body. He threw himself upright into a sitting position but in the process of doing so he accidentally slammed his forehead against the figure whose face was technically still in close proximity.
Cursing, Sarawat clutched his head as pain made white spots cloud his vision. “ Fuck .”
From next to him the figure cursed too. “ Shit.”
Eventually the pain subsided into a dull ache, allowing Sarawat to glance over at the boy—ghost, supernatural being, angel, whatever—next to him.
The top half of his face was no longer translucent anymore.
In fact, he wasn’t translucent at all.
Crimson blood began to trickle out from his nose, causing Sarawat to gape in horror.
Not because the image was a terrifying one. I mean, yeah, it was a bit weird but it has been established that Sarawat, that certifiable himbo, was in a constant state of ‘mark me down as scared and horny’ tonight, but because a ghost...was bleeding. From a wound that Sarawat gave him. Was that like, scientifically possible? Note to self: send a text to Earn so that she can ask her girlfriend about it.
Also? Sarawat was finally able to label the ghost's eyes as being a cross between honey and caramel. Obviously, his poor gay started chanting oh oh oh oh oh because yeah, read above, Sarawat Guntithanon? Himbo, Simp, Dumbass Extraordinaire. Either way he was a mess.
The possible brain injury and the shock of the entire night finally caught up to Sarawat, making his stomach churn with nausea and vision become blurry.
Without meaning to, Sarawat fainted—not even elegantly like one of those heroines in a romance novel but like a dead, fucking fish, limbs flopping every which way—right into the arms of the mysterious figure he was still dying ( yikes bad choice of words) to know the name of.
The last thing he registered before completely blacking out was that someone was cradling him to their chest, rambling away.
“Oh my god. Did I just kill him? No. No way. He’s still breathing. Shit. Sarawat! Hey, you saraleo, wake up!”
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noya-sleftankle · 28 days ago
It’s wind anon. I know I should react to the Kenma part, but I just went through the update, saw Meiko’s portion and I have feelings that I need to get out because I’m so far gone right now—
I swear, I can break down every single text what the flip is this BS. Meiko, dear, do you,,,have a concussion. Are you thinking. What,,, this is like the time you were underdressed at the restaurant and you ended up getting drunk as heck.
Okay, let’s do the breakdown.
Coming in hot, we see Meiko with “tooru!!!!!!” (Yes, I did count the number of exclamation marks) firstly, the usage of his first name after ‘exiled’ where she raged at him and used Oikawa instead... mood swing much because I cannot believe the audacity of this... and really. First name basis. Trying to be close and to get rid of animosity, but not offering up anything like “hey, I’d appreciate talking to you for a sec if you’re free?” Or an apology for blowing up at him because he did indeed have your back, it’s just that you were the one problem. But yes, the exclamation marks too. A bit childish, obvious excitement...mmmm, I’ll move on to the next section.
Oikawa’s “oh. hey meiko” shows that he really ain’t up for this. First is the obvious low energy. I don’t want to go into depth about that but the “oh” shows that he paused. He saw her message. He answered. And he didn’t expect her to talk to him. Especially with that sort of energy. Mixed feelings towards her. And his “hey meiko”. I would say he is one of the more energetic of the House. He probably would’ve done something like “meiko!!! <3” in response before or something like that. He’s a bit flashy in that regard. But no punctuation. Just a downtrodden “hey” in response.
“don’t sound so enthused” she says. I mean, at the very least it seems she understands and can grasp tone from messages? But I am like “it would be more surprising for him to be enthused? I’m in awe of how you were able to become so enthused after you got yourself crushed into pieces by YN...” Besides that, even if Meiko wasn’t physically hurt, a confrontation of this sort would not lead to anyone having a happy mood? Me glancing between Meiko and all the therapists that were mentioned before because I really hope that we can figure something out because she gives off so many different vibes I am like... “what even goes on inside her brain...”
“can you blame me? you yelled at me the last time i talked to you” and this is the truth. He shouldn’t be enthused. You yelled at him, you disregarded his concern and you showed that you didn’t care for him as a person. Even if there was a circumstance where she didn’t yell at Oikawa, he would reach out first and be concerned about her health. Meiko has no grounds to try and blame him for anything right now. Frankly, I don’t think Oikawa should have even bothered answering her because I don’t think he is in the best place emotionally to deal with her.
“im so sorry sweetheart!!!! i didn’t mean it :(” lemme just day, wind anon cannot believe the BS that this message is. First, she says she is sorry. But really? Really. I can’t even look at her. Look, I don’t know what it is but “I’m so sorry.” Has the weakest apology energy. “I’m sorry.” Fine, decent, the classic and simplest. “I’m really sorry.” Also good! Shows regret. “I’m so sorry.” Sounds like you when you just learn that a person’s family member has passed away. There is something about “I’m so sorry” that doesn’t sound sincere to me and it’s infuriating. Next, the “sweetheart” I might’ve gagged a bit internally. Does she,,, talk like that? Normally? Is that a thing? She’s younger than him...and I don’t know but sweetheart sounds so condescending I literally can’t even— and finally, the “I didn’t mean it” yeah, well, you don’t mean anything because everything you say is BS that’s what you mean. Stop excusing your behavior. There is no merit behind it.
“you know i was just beat up and i couldn’t control what i was saying”. Okay, let’s break this down too. First, trying to incur sympathy by the “I was just beat up.” I cannot believe this gal. And the “you know” for a reference to a person’s knowledge of the matter, it lets them be more susceptible to beliefs. But the “I couldn’t control what I was saying” is complete utter hogwash. I mean, Meiko can’t control any bit of her because she is just impulse. But she excused her inability to control herself by saying it was because she was just beat up.
I don’t know what to say for the next portion. Alone, it’s cute, but put into perspective it’s just manipulation and she doesn’t love him. I’ll just move on.
“what do you need that you can’t ask iwa-chan?” Okay, so he didn’t reciprocate with an “I love you too” so that just shows what type of mood and how effective her words were. It also shows that she always messaged Oikawa when she needed something, because he caught on super quick to that. The “Iwa-chan” is interesting though. I wanna know if Oikawa talks to Iwaizumi after this conversation with Meiko because she is clearly going behind his back right now.
“oh well hajime is being very rude rn. he won’t let me leave my room!!!!” Okay, he had best interests at heart and Meiko...I know every single one of your rooms has a bathroom too. They’re bringing you food. They are letting people go into your room. Meiko, you wouldn’t have lasted quarantine if you’re this petulant now. It’s literally going to be like, 3 days max if you work to get an actual solution. I don’t want to break this down, I feel this is self explanatory. She feels entitled still.
“i know, it’s for your own good” he replies, and that is true but I am also of the belief that it is (hopefully) better for the rest of the house to not be in contact with her so I guess that’s that. Anyway, this shows Oikawa placating her, next
Meiko...being...not pretty. “ugh!!! but i wanna go out!!!!!!” Yeah, she would not have been able to be safe throughout the pandemic. Please,,, you’ll have fresh air if you open up a window,,, I know for certain you don’t exercise,,, please Meiko, shut up already you are making yourself look like more of a pile of garbage than you depict yourself as please I cannot handle the idea that the guys fell for this act—
“you have a black eye babe” okay, the black eye is actually Tooru trying to refer to knowledge that she has. As in, she should be trying to rest and get better right now. (Just curious, who treated her? For the injuries? She raged at Iwaizumi and Oikawa so maybe Daichi?) the babe gives off the placating vibe to me, still low energy, not very affectionate, but it’s there so I’m like “hm”.
“so??? omg are you calling me ugly tooru???????” Well...he didn’t call you ugly. But I might? Because you have the ugliest personality of everyone here. But also, shifting blame onto him. Gosh, I give Oikawa some water. He’ll get a migraine from this.
“of course not. i would never”. Low energy, not elaborating, I think he sees that she is trying to manipulate him, or at the very least he isn’t going to play that particular game. But actually, he runs a fashion channel on YouTube. We know Bokuto runs a fitness one and his header message was something along the lines of everyone’s bodies are beautiful, so chances are Oikawa has the same sort of idea for his channel too. He may criticize fashion, but he would never criticize the people wearing it or the people who made it in a mean way. He would be respectful, and he lets people do what they wish because it’s their choice. I mean, there has to be a reason why Meiko’s fashion is how it is—he doesn’t intrude on matters that aren’t his to intrude upon.
Okay, Meiko. I’m gonna stop trying to format the messages exactly how they are, autocorrect is making my time with them a bit too much, but she says she wants him to take her with him. Okay, starting off, you are really under the belief that he will take you on to a trip he has planned when he didn’t invite you in the first place? Pushy... but yes, her petulance again... me flicking water at her, “you got super drunk because you were underdressed at a fancy restaurant and now you have a face that looks like roadkill, how much do you want to embarrass yourself before you get turned into a pariah?”
Oikawa not knowing how she knows that is clear concern. Someone knowing your schedule when it’s none of their business and not public knowledge is major red flag. The “uh” shows that he is clearly taken aback. The ellipses shows that he doesn’t know what to think.
Okay, Meiko—she is actually able to notice something??? Good golly gee, I am baffled by how she did that when everything else she does is on fire. But the consistency probably gave it in. She may have been looking for him at one point, noticed he was out, and saw the pattern then. But actually, wouldn’t she be good at noticing the patterns of the guys so that she always knows which one to go to and use? Thoughts.... but I’m curious about the fact she said the “same group of absolute losers”. I highly doubt they always go and meet up directly in eye view of the house? Chances are they meet up at a bar or something? This potentially could be a thing where Meiko was stalking them? It would be interesting if she saw them while she was out as well—and if yahaba and kyoutani noticed her around before too. Also, her saying “you ain’t slick” like,,, Meiko, have you looked into a mirror. Can you see.
Oikawa defending his friends, we stan. Let’s move on though: “they’re so much younger than you?? and yahaba is def not cute lmao” me, doing like the... monkey meme where they look away because I am just like??? Meiko, you’re younger than Oikawa. I bet Yahaba and Kyoutani are your age. And anyone younger than you is a loser huh? That’s why you look at Bokuto and YN like they are dirt beneath your feet. (And Yes, I do remember that you put Bokuto and YN as the babies of the house, this reoccurrence is very well done). And she went and insulted Yahaba directly like...you’re talking to his friend? What are you doing? Excuse me? I beg your pardon?
And the ellipses strike again— and Oikawa is fishing for information because we have seen him—he listens to logic. And Meiko... her emojis... wind anon be flicking more water at her, she is too much. Also. Kyoutani. She is calling Kyoutani cute. This was the message that made wind anon start this long analysis. Kyoutani, cute? Listen. Kyoutani would take one look at this parasite hanging off his arm with her swollen black eye that was slathered with makeup and her lacking clothing sense, before looking at Oikawa who would be so haggard by then, and then Kyoutani would force her off his arm before grabbing Oikawa and running off with Yahaba following them. There is no way at all Kyoutani would involve himself with Meiko. I refuse to believe he would go for her.
Okay, the two messages after about wingmanning—I don’t want to do a large scale analysis of it. Oikawa really is shown to have good sense for Meiko’s intentions. His intuition is good. And we know that he cares and respects his friends and he focuses on their capabilities. He knows them. Meiko is just...childish in the worst of ways.
“You don’t see the issue with this”. Oikawa really digging in his feet. First, he wished to be in a relationship with Meiko. And here she is, asking for him to wingman to get her together with one of his friends, who may not even like her—and I bet that if it doesn’t go well, she would blame Oikawa for it like really—but I give Oikawa more water for the migraines Meiko induces.
“What?? It’s not like we’re actually together lol”. The laugh out loud at the end really shows how much of a joke she sees this as. She sees him as a joke. And she just crushed all his efforts and actions to try and get into a relationship. And actually...will Meiko ever get into a relationship with another? She has no loyalty. She definitely wouldn’t have ever got into a dedicated relationship with one of the guys. And she would be the type to get upset if they slept around, wouldn’t she? A hypocrite.
“Ugh don’t be like that!!! I’m sure you sleep around too!!” Okay, she is trying to defend herself while also potentially blaming him if he does. It’s just manipulation...I’m gonna move on...
Oikawa’s just done and his “I don’t” holds a lot of emotion. But Meiko’s response back I don’t believe at all. “Oh well that’s your fault, I don’t really give a sh*t if you sleep around hehe!!!” First, blaming him for his choice of only choosing you??? And I highly doubt the second part because she is shown to throw blame and ditch people for negligible reasons—I have no trust towards her words. I do not believe her. I believe she would care. I believe she would blow up at the guy before leaving him.
“Of course you don’t” And there is the utter doneness. He has given up on Meiko in this message. He doesn’t care anymore. He was already not in the mood for her when she first messaged him, he doesn’t want to see her at all anymore. He’s given up.
“So you get it!! Perfect!!!!” Please, wind anon has written so much already, her eyes are sweating everytime she has to look at Meiko being like this hhhhh. “I’ll be ready at like 9pm? Come by my room!! Actually no I’ll come by yours” and her usage of emoji. Get her away from me and everyone in PF. She’s toxic. Send her off with hazardous waste. Also, she deliberately changed from her room to coming by his. She is cutting off him so he has to go with her, he can’t just sneak out and not wait at her room (though she did offer a time so he could just go out now and ditch her presence completely). But it would be amusing if he did something like lock his door, (either after he’d go out or if he wold leave through window) and she would just be there waiting all decked out in her clothes and makeup pounding on his door. He wouldn’t answer and the others would see her out of her room (a misdemeanor). And then she would have to make an excuse. But it would be hard...because Oikawa has text evidence of Meiko going against Iwaizumi to just play like this.
“And if I say no?” Says Oikawa, who is testing the waters—very smart. We approve. “You won’t.” She replies, because she is terrible and we hate her controlling, manipulative, abusive self and we would all fight her. And she ends it off with a “great!! see you then!” Because she has to have her way and the last say.
Okay, wind anon is done
Completely. Utterly done with the analysis and reaction for that. Might not get to Kenma and YN analysis because I went off in this one but just know I appreciate it and I’ll try to get to it—just,,,not today.
I hope Oikawa sends these screenshots to like, Iwaizumi at the very least but it would be even better if he just drops it in a group chat with Daichi and Osamu instead and asks them to keep an eye on her for “her own safety” and ask her to stay in her room. She’s too daring and if she blows up on him after, he will receive more evidence of her being terrible. And of course, he’s smart. He’ll definitely block her number when he doesn’t want to bother with her anymore. Okay, wind anon is ending here. The ask is too long. I think it’s the longest ask I’ve ever sent. I wish you well fr0ggy. I hope your sleep is pleasant and you wake up very rested and refreshed!
WOO LONG POST!!!! i cannot nearly respond to all this!!!! but!!!! i am in Awe??? text by text???? i love this????? ur so amazing i <3 u
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Scales are crap right? Like nonsense? I’ve been back on keto for nearly a full month now, not *really* counting calories but keeping a vague eye on my intake so it’s not ridiculous.
I wasn’t planning on weighing myself for a while but a week into it I had to go to hospital for my surgery pre-assessment and I had to be weighed so I was like 🤷🏼‍♀️. Before that I hadn’t weighed myself in many months but I kind of intuited what I probably weighed, based on the fact that I have surpassed my previous highest weight. I can “feel” when I passed that mark. Also the appearance of brand new stretch marks tells me “we have not been here before” (at this weight).
The hospital scale told me I was about 10-15kg off the mark with my “intuitive” guess at my weight. I apparently vastly overestimated! I was like, oh cool!
Three weeks later I can’t bear it anymore and I buy a scale for home, cuz I need some sort of proof that the keto is working bc obviously I look the same to my eyes. I don’t wanna weigh myself obsessively but if it’s not working I wanna know so I can change something.
So three weeks after the hospital weigh in, and my new home scale tells me I’ve lost... 1kg. In three weeks on fairly strict keto. What the fuck. That ain’t right. That’s not what happens lmao
Idk if this scale isn’t calibrated right or if the hospital scale wasn’t...
But I’ve weighed myself every day since I got the scale (so about a week now) and I’ve consistently been losing slightly less than 1kg PER DAY. obvs daily weight fluctuations don’t mean a heck of a lot but it’s been nearly a week and I’m like 3-4kg lighter according to this scale.
I haven’t changed anything about my eating, been the same the whole month. It’s actually way more chill than other attempts at keto, idk if it’s cuz I’m at home all the time and can actually manage to make things like seed and almond crackers, or sugar free sauces, etc that I didn’t have time to do while working, so I had fewer options available and I’d inevitably fail. It feels so much easier this time, I have less mental strain trying to think of things to eat. Boredom was a big problem before, there’s only so much chicken breast you can eat before you’re like “nope”. Same with bacon, like I like bacon but not to the extent of most people on the internet lmao like those bacon memes, can’t relate. I love it with poached eggs and avocado on some sort of bread (RIP).
Anyway if I’m losing like a couple of kg a week then I couldn’t possibly have lost only 1kg in 3 weeks doing the exact same thing... I feel like I must have weighed MUCH more than the hospital scale told me I did. So I think my actual starting weight was pretty much exactly what I intuited... that’s weird right? But like. We know our bodies, don’t we? Like idek if the scale is recording reality but I don’t really care what I *actually* weigh, just as long as the number is getting lower over time with my efforts.
I have a surgery coming up, so that’s sort of why I’m doing this. It’s abdominal surgery, and they’re going to be doing some slicey cutty things around my ureter which I am quite nervous about bc it’s prone to damage during this sort of thing. And I know surgery is higher risk when you’re overweight. I don’t really believe that fat bodies are inherently a higher risk, but I do believe that doctors are not routinely trained to operate on fat bodies enough to make them as profiecient at it. So it’s not that I don’t trust my body or blame it for the risk, I don’t trust the surgeons to be experienced enough with fat bodies to keep me safe. So I’m going to try and lower that risk myself.
I gained a metric ton of weight over the last year through immobility from this latest flare up and also stress/binge eating. I knew I couldn’t get a handle on it until my housing situation was no longer threatened, till I could feel a bit more secure. I didn’t have the mental bandwidth until now to even TRY to take away the only coping mechanism I had.
Tldr scales are weird and confusing but I Think? I am making slow progress. Also should note a lot of initial weight loss on keto is water being lost so the number isn’t as drastic as it sounds. But also I have at least 50kg of excess to lose, so no one panic, got plenty to spare. It comes off quick at first bc of all that water retention from the high carb, highly processed diet I had before, suddenly disappearing lol
Afterthought, I think literally it’s the Everything But The Bagel seasoning that’s making keto so easy this time lmfao. DIY obvs but god DAMN ITS AMAZING highly recommend. I’m years late to this party
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autisticlalna · a month ago
hdgsgsdf omg karl's latest diaries are a trip and a delight when thinking about honk, like esp once he knows that honk's influenced by the in between, karl literally references the in between as a friend looking out for him!! honk is literally karl's friend guiding and helping him!! and then the hints that theres more going on that he can't trust, his hesitancy about the in between translating over to honk. it's so fun to think about, applying the canon to the spau. like "i genuinely feel safe talking to honk about what's troubling me, but clearly i can't trust him with everything, even if he is trying to protect me, bc i dont know how much of him anymore is me or him or the inbetween"
but oooooooo, that sounds like such a cool fic part!!! bro!!! sapnap expecting honk to be, like, a legitimate shadow, a karl-tinted version of his own, but it just feels halfway like talking to karl and it's So Weird. i can imagine at some point later sapnap hearing karl call his name and turning around like "hey karl! :D" but it's. just honk standing there.
and Yes poor honk!! like he didn't ask for Any of this, he could've formed whatever relationships and friendships he wanted, and instead he has to deal with this weird guilt trip of feeling like hes somehow stealing karl's, bc he remembers them all like he was there and the more he gains about them the more karl loses. and on top of that, it's not like any of them are reciprocated bc no matter how it feels honk is not karl??? which leaves honk in this awful limbo where he wants to reach out but he also Does Not Want to reach out, and it won't turn out well either way. :(
but shsjhdahgdjs it's like!!! the argo question thing!! how many times can you repair a ship, replacing it's broken parts, until it's just not the same ship anymore. except here it's also if you use all the old parts to build a whole new identical ship, what's the difference between the new ship and the original? which is the real argo? LIKE. that's such a terrifying question for both of them to ponder!! if theres nothing left of karl, but honk now has everything he lost, how the heck do either of them come back from that?? that's suuuuch an intriguing slope to think about, omg.
hfhdhshdh i went back to watch the vod of it and its still. so good. karl coming back up from the secret room and they're just There, and karl going through and checking every single book, clearly freaked out, and then putting all of them back, like. Bruh. it hits so hard
honk really do be like ":]" vibes and karl runs away
hhhhh, honk starting out more shadowy and just acting as the in between says and then gradually getting more and more persony and rationalizing it to help karl, and then shooting the in between in the foot bc yes he was brought out to help the in between but even more he was brought out to help karl and he knows which of the two takes priority (trying to ignore which one has the ability to dictate his actions tho). like!!!!! honk's character arc!!!!!! his friendship with karl!!!!! my heart is full!!!
but legit, karl will show up in the black hoodie and all of us will (beyonce meme) HONK!?
also. honk playlist. :o pog
me: i am going to go to bed inbox: [1] me: i am not going to go to bed (I PROMISE IM GOING TO GO TO BED AFTER I ANSWER THIS I JUST GOT EXCITED)
ITS SO SO SO SO SO MUCH FUN WHEN CANON STUFF ENDS UP SUPPORTING SPAU DECISIONS theres like, a joke back when spau was only a hermitcraft thing where we accidentally predicted some elements of season 7 waaayyyy before s7 was even announced. its wild. AND ITS SUCH A FUN PERSPECTIVE TO ADD ON TO IT like, man im just thinkin abt that journal now. AND YEA THE UHHH WILD WEST ONE WHERE HE’S LIKE “i can see why the inbetween wanted me to move the library, im glad i have someone looking out for me” OR W/E . GOD DAMN
YEAH LIKE,,, sapnap’s starting to get how his own shadow (Pan! i love pan. would love to draw him someday.) acts, has some reasonable expectations for when he interacts with honk, and honk is just... Off. Wrong. it’s like he’s talking to karl but just a Little off-center, somewhere between comfortable and uncomfortable, aaand i just remembered i wrote something somewhere hold on
He’s surrounded by people he vaguely knows from secondhand becoming firsthand— random memories and anecdotes about players he’s never spoken to falling through the gaps in Karl’s memory to land in his hands. Honk has never met Lazar, but the connection of face-to-name is there; he remembers being close to Eret, but Eret probably doesn’t even know he exists.  It’s almost a relief to meet people Karl hasn’t, because Honk has time to build up his own perspective before it gets knocked askew by the inbetween shoving more pages into his book.
    The hardest ones to talk to are Sapnap and Quackity. Karl’s still holding onto most of his memories of them, but there’s some things that slipped through his fingers. It makes Honk’s heart hurt looking at them, and it’s not helped at all by his shadow instincts raising their hackles at the sight of a player. There’s been awkward scenes where Sapnap would try to talk to him— ask him where Karl was, ask him about his day, let him know Pan was around, overall trying to be a nice guy— and Honk would treat it like mashing through all the dialogue options to get through the conversation as quickly as possible before he snapped.
    He’s pretty sure Sapnap thinks he’s an asshole. It sucks.
HI THAT’S FROM AN UNFINISHED FIC THAT WAS MOSTLY ME FIGURING OUT HONK’S OPINIONS ON EVERYONE IN PREPARATION FOR WRITING OTHER THINGS anyway honk is just, Uncanny and also attempting to alt+f4 out of any social interaction with people he has cluttered feelings about bc it is intensely uncomfortable for everyone involved lmao
YEAH... YEAH.......... bc like, no one Actually Knows what honk’s deal is asides from him being a Weird Shadow, so he cant exactly like. open up to like, sap or q or anybody bc they have like, no idea who he even Is. and like, would they even believe him? karl can still get the support he needs if he’s ever able to reach out and spill his secrets, but honk only has karl. kinda very ow now that i think about it. ):
SHIP OF THESEUS!!!!!!!!! hi me and my roommate go apeshit over the ship of theseus for. numerous reasons. so i literally dm’d them after seeing this in my inbox like YOU’RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS lmfao anyway. its SO weird and cool and fucked up to think about, and also very much a question they’re going to have to face if they don’t fix karl’s memory Fast
MAN I LOVE KARL’S ACTING IN THE INBETWEEN SEGMENTS altho him putting the books back very politely is kinda funny. also seeing signed books stack in his hotbar is actually weirdly terrifying. AUGH IM PROBABLY GONNA BE ANALYZING ALL THE INBETWEEN SEMGNETS TOMORROW ARENT I i have. worms
honk, circa masquerade: i won’t let you forget! karl: nice! pog! honk, circa haunted mansion: we make a good team! :] karl: [RUNS] honk: :[ ?????
YES!!!! EXACTLY!!!!!!!! like even tho honk’s spent like, his conscious existence helping the inbetween’s plans, he’s also been helping karl, been seeing him after every journey-- and even if every part of him the inbetween rooted itself into is yelling “no”, honk is gonna fight against it as hard as he can because karl needs help and honk is Here To Help Him and karl is his priority. the library is not more important than his summoner’s safety. it never has been, no matter what the inbetween told them both.
.....IM LISTENING TO THE WIP PLAYLIST AS I TYPE THIS AND AIRFIELD JUST STARTED PLAYING AND IM GONNA CRY (rn the playlist is like 4 songs but tomorrow ill pop off. i love making fanmixes)
grabs black hoodie karl. you have a 50/50 chance of being diagnosed with honk, you little twerp
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loopy777 · a month ago
What’s the longest fanfic ya have ever read?
For me it would be a 400k fanfic. Didn’t regret it since it was so good! But I wondered what’s the longest one that ya read so far? And was it good?
The fic that immediately occurs to me as the longest is “To The Stars,” the most famous ‘Puella Magi Madoka Magica‘ fanfic. I checked it out mainly out of curiosity, since I consider the original anime to be one of the best written out of the entire medium, and every discussion about it eventually leads to someone hyping “To The Stars.”
I was disappointed to find that while TTS is a fairly imaginative science fiction epic, it captures pretty much nothing of the Madoka anime; even the returning characters don’t really ring true, getting into the exaggerations typically seen in fandom memes. The writing itself also couldn’t sustain an epic of that size, as I found myself quickly confusing OCs (and there are a lot of OCs) because the writing just assumes I can keep all those names straight and makes little effort to differentiate them in terms of voice. It also made the odd choice of depicting a future so advanced that people have smartphones integrated into their bodies, and yet a character on the Ace Spectrum is treated as this astronomically unlikely thing that no one can comprehend. Weird.
I was invested in the main mysteries, and I did like the setting, but I got to what was the last update at the time and never felt the need to read any updates since then. Maybe someday I’ll return to it. It was pretty cool how it combined anime-style Magical Girls with a hard scifi military setting. And I’ll bring a character guide.
Anyway, TTS is nearly 777k words, longer than anything I’ve read in the Avatar fandom- which is the main place I read fanfic. I’ve only read short fiction from the Transformers and Star Wars fandoms. So it must be the winner.
The longest Avatar fanfic I’ve read turned out to be... MY OWN! “Traitor’s Face” is 715,392 words, complete, and it’s the 11th longest AtLA story on FanFiction.net, and the 10th longest on AO3! Yay, me! XD I’ve also probably read it several times over, since I had to keep refreshing myself as I wrote it. One of these days I really need to do a straight-through read, now that I have some distance from it. I hope it’s good.
The longest Avatar fanfic I’ve read that I didn’t write is @awesomeavocadolove‘s “Another Brother,” at just over 325k words. However, I’ve only read up to the end of the first Book, so I know I haven’t read all those words. I want to, because I really like the story and the first Book ends on a heck of a cliffhanger, but I’m very behind on all my fanfic reading. Someday!
The longest completed Avatar fanfic I’ve read is “Reconstructed Destinies,” at just under 300k words. It’s really popular, but I didn’t like it at all. I couldn’t buy into the central premise, that Aang would have the same sunny personality if he was raised by Ozai in the royal family and Zuko would be the same prickly pessimistic grump if he was raised by Gyatso amongst the Air Nomads. I see the characters as being too influenced by their environments, especially Zuko with all the trauma and abuse he suffered through his childhood. I also felt like it was a little too fawning over Aang. I love Aang, but this started to feel really lopsided.
The longest Transformers fanfic I’ve read is “Peace Through Tyranny,” at just over 36k words. It stars a functional OC, is a prequel to an obscure short story I didn’t even read until much later, and is basically a riff on the ‘Apocalypses Now’ and ‘Heart of Darkness.’ I loved it. It was one of those “War is Hell!” stories that leaves me lightheaded when I finish, not quite sure if I’m living in my pleasant suburban life or I’m a dying soldier hallucinating some strange fanfic-based existence as my body grows cold.
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banditbeam · a month ago
Hi 🦋 I understand when people don‘t like forlex and can‘t ship it. I wouldn‘t liked it either if S2 didn‘t happen. I was so invested in malex, in their cosmic love and watched RNM only bc of malex. But unfortunately Miluca happened. 🤮🤮🤮
And I like Alex more than Michael, bc Michael tainted his love and relationship with Alex. I don‘t care that Michael did what he did out of fear or whatever reasons he had. You don‘t threat and hurt the person you love by choosing sb else over them.
But you can‘t compare Forlex and Miluca.
Forlex is a just a relationship without hurting anybody. Whereas Miluca is betraying and going after your best friends love - knowing he still loves him! Dismissing Alex and his feelings, Michael declaring Alex that he is not good enough, giving him the feeling that he doesn’t love him (to be honest during whole S2 I didn‘t see any signs of his love for Alex) and being a shitty friend.
Miluca was/is bad and even evil🤮🤬 Both Michael and Maria should be ashamed of what they did to Alex! I don‘t know who is worse: Michael or Maria. We all know what Maria did wrong but Michael was not better. I don‘t understand why people defend Michaels behavior bc of his trauma. Having a bad childhood doesn‘t give you the right to act like an asshole and to blame other people. HE told Alex that he liked her, HE didn’t go after Alex, HE made the decision to be in a relationship with her and the worst is he told her he loved her. Everything about Miluca is negative and toxic and hurting Alex.
Alex being in relationship with Forrest doesn‘t betray anybody.
I want happy Alex with Forrest or sb else. I want an Alex who tell the people around him what kind of jerks they are, only calling when they need sth. I wish he would call Maria out and tell her, what she did wrong and stops being friends with her. And ask Liz if she would have given the same advice if Maria was in love with Max.
I want in S3 a better treatment for Alex!
Hey man, I may not ship Forlex but that don’t mean you can’t. Ship the heck out of it! I also have never compared Miluca to Forlex because I’ve never thought to do that lol. It wouldn’t make any sense anyway. I don’t ship Forlex simply because I’m a one ship at a time person, Malex is literally the only ship on air that I truly care about atm. Sad right? I only want Michael for Alex which is why I’m so upset in the memes I make lol. By all means, enjoy Forlex, I’m sure it’s a much happier world to be in. 
You’re right Michael didn’t choose Alex. He did not choose Alex on multiple occasions. It sucks. I have no idea how season 3 is going to clean that up but I’m interested in at least seeing what the current showrunner has planned for season 3. I’m going to give them at least a chance in trying to salvage something for this ship. You can just skip the Michael/Malex scenes if you don’t want to see them or only watch the Forlex scenes, do whatever your heart desires.
I also would love to see Alex finally sticking up for himself and telling everyone off in season 3. I would love it if Alex were to have a real housewives moment and tell everyone they’re a prostitution whore, and they can shove it where the sun don’t shine. But unfortunately that’s just not in his character. He’ll stick up for literally everyone, forgive anyone who’s ever hurt him and never expect anyone to love him or choose him first. It’s just how the character was written. It’s why we love him so much and are able to easily hate the other characters who have hurt him. I hope season 3 gives him a voice in standing up for himself, we’ll just have to wait and see!
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pastelsceneselfships23 · a month ago
You don't know jack, Quiplash and Monster seeking monster for the awesome man :D (selfship-soup)
eee @selfship-soup​ , thank you for the aSk bdhsfg ngl ive been excited to write out even tho i end up thinking and researching agai n with mBTI along with ummm selfSHIP BFSJDKGBHJM 
You don’t know jack - Weird canon fact or hc of f/o!
hmmmm odd canon fact, he sneezes when he's bored???
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idk even the wiki mentions it- idk i think it was quite unusual but welp !! bgfsjdgksjng
Quiplash - What's something that always make your f/o laugh?
idk, he laughs a lot of things from me sometimes- !! I mean, by general we send each other memes, humour.. my reactions over his acts/pokes around with- like for instance- he tricks me in reacting a certain thing- or joke-
like um
'um Gilbert, do you know where my phone as at?"
'hm. i dont know.... i think you left it over the store shelf- before we left"
"oh nOOOO-' he starts laughing through my reaction- "Your face! Ah, actually I have it here" tbh tho i would probably laugh again and gently hit him b c man he's- he can be teasing sometimes-
Monster seeking monster - free gush pass
holy he c k i love how excited he gets when it comes with teachinG- or well- anything he gets excited abt- i just- i adore h i m liKE-
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ngl tho i would imagine having to work with pronunciation with him,, even tho im like not the best with it- ((i have been offically diagnosed with APD as a child but i dont know if I still have it,,, im still unsure if i still do but well-)) but yeA i might end u p kinda like japan as well but id be 
“(insert pronounce attempt) ????’ ‘ (insert pronounce attempt) 🤔🤔‘ gil: ;> you’re close, try again but louder-
and idk- maybe id be like japan too- instead just uhh id be like ‘hecK im bad at thIS’
>-< hes quite encouraging tho- so for sure he starts motivating me-
though if i got to develop tho, as many others would say (even irl) ive heard ive been a fast learner so- i think Gil would also say that- :0 idk. 
anyway um yea seeing the comic strip there- im sure this is a new selfship headcanon with thIS ghdfkkhgbg idk 🤔 🤔 🤔
heck- i hope you’d enjoy hfbndhBFH i was thinkin g a lot with that- 
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battleshot · a month ago
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𝑹𝑨𝑽𝑼𝑺𝑵𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻𝑩𝑳𝑶𝑺𝑺𝑶𝑴  You know what? In all truth, it doesn’t matter what we think. This is your unique portrayal. All that matters is that YOU are enjoying yourself in your hobby. Don’t let the opinions of other people be what validates you. You’re worth far more than hateful anonymous messages and both you and your muse are adored by those who matter. Never change anything. 💜
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cba with adding it as another meme so ANYWAY. fox, plz you really didn’t have to send in a second thing. Bless you and your heart for doing so. I hear what you’re saying, but what people think does matter a teeny bit to me, else if i was that shockingly bad, then -- people would eventually stop writing with me. and if i never knew what I did wrong, then I couldn’t ever improve. THAT BEING SAID. yes. this is my escape. Tumblr has helped me through a time that was ... well, the most hardest thing I’ve ever been through -- still kinda going through -- If it wasn’t for tumblr, I’d be sat here, all alone, and I’d feel alone. But thanks to the kind souls like yourself, I can sit here in my own company and feel wanted by others, so for the ones I love such as yourself, I can’t thank you enough for having us in your lives. I’ve made friends here that I know will be in my life for the longest time, and I’ll never forget, nor be able to repay the kindness and generosity of those who have let me cry on the phone to them, made me laugh, and even taken time out of their day --- to just talk to me. Anyway. I kinda went off here. But I’ve been knocking about on the Tumblr community for years now on and off, and it’s never stuck. work has always got in the way, but the people such as yourself is what makes me continue to want to write, to get excited about. Heck, I’ve even got my non roleplay friends asking about my threads now, AND even encouraged someone’s daughter to play FFXV because they wanted to be able to talk to me about Prompto. So Prom will always have a special place in my heart. <3 
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sydneysweetass · a month ago
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03/04/2021
Another day, another Zylbrad performance. I measure the days with my morning coffee and my morning aerial shotgun. It’s a simple life, but it works for me.
So anyway, today, he’s playing with Birno and Militia, his irl girlfriend. She’s good, pub streams with a VR anime avi and Birno is the maybe still current #1 PC Wattson, but has been playing Horizon lately because she has, you know, abilities and stuff. He and Brad have both fought against it because they don’t like the spirit of Horizon Mains, but golly it’s hard to deny the capabilities  in the hands of someone Good At The Game. This ep was good, worth watching, as are all the others, but I wanted to talk to you, PawneeForever, about how this man uses pathfinder, even when he’s next to useless up close (compared to his normal self). This is what you should be angling to do every match you play as our idiot robotic brother (Paull Rudd reference and an accurate takedown).
Brad’s using the 30-30, twice! the 60-60, if you must. Despite this, he still knows how to count damage on his enemies, vs how much he’s taken. He knows when to leave and when to stay, how to make his enemies have to pop a bat rather than chase. He can engage, fall out the window and reappear in the same window to catch someone pooping.
Starts at 16:55
In their first scrap, before he’s got a 30-30, he pushes in hard up on top of them with his spitfire after seeing how close Militia and Birno were on their flank, with Birno having directed “let’s kill these people first.” Brad deals good damage, but ducks away after getting hit. He doesn’t, however, begin to heal, he reloads, as Loba and Horizon are pushing in hard down below, taking all of the attention of the Gibby and, idk, Lifeline? It’s kind of hard to tell which character it was under all their bullets.
Then, on the team pushing in on them from above, Brad swings wide after an armor swap. He flies up to punch the Wattson, keeping her out of the building. Birno goes down, having been their principle damage dealing point player. Militia is also lit up because she was next to brad with a beefy eva to help take down the Wattson. She’s 1hp so she pulls a Loba and does the selfish thing and heals. This is a good thing, Brad’s done enough damage to prevent a hard push, the pathfinder wasn’t able to help himself, trying to peak in with a wingman. Bad idea, because Brad’s popped a med kit and is ready to scrap, knowing that even if he goes down, it’s only the Pathfinder left and that Militia will be full health right behind him. He also, however, has a spitfire and knows how to hit a standing still, Wingman using, pleb pathfinder. He also knew where he was because Birno was keeping eyes up there and told him.
At 19:15, Birno is pretty far ahead and is getting moved in on by a full 3 stack. Brad is worried Biro will go down, so he calls, “Press Q, you’ll live!” Q is the term for the tactical on PC cuz thats the letter on the keyboard the tactical is attached to. We have L1, doesn’t sound as cute. So Birno presses q and gets up and out of immediate danger, as brad puts a zipline as close to Birno’s feet as possible, so when he gets to the ground, he can take it to retreat as Brad pushes in to fight them. Militia is the midground between them, with covering fire and moderate damage. By that point, it’s only a two stack, as Birno’s gotten one down and retreated to high ground by the time Brad gets there. Militia knocks one with a Mastiff and Brad ended up not being needed to finish the squad, as Birno cleans it up. The man’s very good, these things happen. Brad even remarks on how little he was needed, “I’m AFK guys. That was twice in a row at this point.” YaBsblll and I aren’t exactly Birno and Militia, but positionally speaking, pathfinder fills a roll and thats often what it looks like.
But Because Birno is insane, the next fight is even more of the same as Birno snags all three without even blinking, lying about how he’s gonna leave some for Brad.
Top 3, 20:20. Brad Zips them up the hill, under wingman fire, but, like, it’s fine, the man has six batteries. He quickly pops one, knowing Birno and Militia are causing plenty of havoc above, taking any immediate (5 seconds worth) of attention.
He gets it off as a bloodhound pushes on him with an r9 that absolutely cannot hit a solid spread to save his life, as Brad just kinda kisses him with the 30 a couple times, falls off the edge to dodge, grapples back up, takes the Bloodhound down since they thought they had time to bat. Birno cleans up, sticks the res on Militia, nearly full health. They didn’t come under fire from the last team, but if they had, they’d have been in decent shape/positioning. Shitty frame tho it is, If they came under fire from anywhere in that open field, Brad could cover fire very easily, Birno can grav lift after the res and Loba can throw her bracelet after she gets to a safe angle, or can move back inside to armor swap or pop her ult and grab her jacket in there. Lots of options. 
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I like when we play characters that give us options. If we want to think about what abilities “come up most often”, we need to think about the situations we most often fail in, and provide ourselves a kit that is most used in those situations. As many different kinds of get out of jail cards, not just a tactical that makes you invisible and invulnerable for a second then gets you fucked by being, i dunno, followed? That’s what’s missing from Wraith as far as how I play is concerned, because of the other point that YaBsblll provided, we need abilities that give us the highest leverage. We need as many Uno reverse cards as possible. This is why I like Fuse for Pawnee as well, it gives him another kind of leverage. Assisting another players retreat with suppression, area denial (thermites and Ult), and heck, sometimes even damage!
Their last enemy was a solo wraith they eventually tamed into a dual, where Brad turns on the Aim assist and wins it ez. That part Pawnee may have trouble with, as Brad is flicking really hard ADS here, something you can only really do M&K.
I love how easy they make the game look. They can meme their way through it. Gotta love it.
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yinyanchan · a month ago
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Been working longer hours. Things have been chaotic since being back. Apparently when I was out sick my company was on the market and was sold. Lots of drama while I sit quietly at my desk at home. Thankfully my job will remain, but until the smoke has cleared from this chaos, I will be working mass amounts of overtime. I do get to write some when there is a lull or down period. Things are slowly but surely getting written.
Had to take a step back with Black as Pitch but the chapter plot and dialouge have been written... as well as some steamy bits... not all that needs to be there, but some.
Unfortunate Souls has been tallied, Bartleby the boss bitty won first chapter to be posted. Things that are emotional will take me longer to write as I'm an emotional sponge and apparently a masochist as I love the ideas but man do they hurt to write. Research has gone into this so be mindful of tags and warnings. I will update tags but in case I miss one there will be a heavy warning for each chapter and the specific trigger warnings. (I was really depressed when the characters and their personal stories were originally created, so I do apologize for the darkness of this story and I definitely know it's not for everyone.) I know a lot of people are saying all of them but this is an individual adoption, each bitty needs a lot of tlc and attention. Choose your own adventure, each chapter is dedicated to one specific bitty. Maybe when it's done I might consider and all out adoption spree... but until then please enjoy your souls chosen bitty and with enough love, therapy, and understanding, your new inseparable and very happy partner.
Housemates: has a chapter plot and main dialouge written (first day of school wonder how that goes...)
Gremlins: I'm actually torn about my original ending on this. Everyone who has watched the movie gremlins knows what happens in the end... there is a lot of surprising stuff along the way but... I'm currently bouncing the ending around right now. #savetheboys #originalending
Dire Wolf: chapter has already been written just needs some editing.... a little angst ridden but all good things to come. Plus a POV of rival number 1 Black himself.
I was going for a walk one day: chapter is fully fleshed but in need of some major editing before posting. All danger noodles will make an appearance.
Darling I do: half a chapter is written and I will do better because I love them and Steven is such a sweet bean and I love writing him just as much as Sans.
Zoot Suit Riot: It will be updated. I swear. I wrote a good portion of it then was hit with a bad case of writers block, as I need filler with hinted references for this one part to work for my plot device. Everything else is planned but this one tiny little thing is the hold up. Sorry for that everyone.
Undercave: this was a big hit and I notice now that I definitely wrote that when I was sick and I posted it thinking it was edited... it's not. I think I even goofed up and had the name Sans in there where it shouldn't be. Anyways chapter 2 is in the works. Shout out to Tyler for getting the Ah-Taa reference. If you never seen the South Park episode 'Bebe's boobs destroy Society' this along with the SpongeBob meme is everything I imagined when thinking about this. Prepare yourselves for some skeletons acting like wild ape men.... soon to be jealous wild ape men. Let the miscommunication hilarity ensue.
Now for something completely random! In my recovery days I got to watch trolls 2 on Hulu, as my mind was absolute mush some days and could only handle tv, and one of the songs (trolls just wanna have fun) made me imagine a funny skeleton scene for some of the lyrics (I'd imagine one of our pun filled guys but any skeleton would do):
Lived underground
To get away from the world
Till I had my life changed by a beautiful girl
Just need the guts to tell her that she's the one! (waves hand around inside empty abdominal area during the just need the guts part)
End scene
I've been told that I rewound that scene and snickered like an idiot by my S/O... and it probably (definitely) was (is) true.
I find a lot of humor in small things. Heck my profile picture was of two boxes I had found in a vegetable cooler as is. Untouched and unmoved by me. They both seem to see something concerning and it's blowing the top one's mind. Considering I did write a smut chapter, for a story that has not been posted called Bone-ifide Goods, for sexy times in a cooler Black/Reader... I think their suprised, concerned, and slightly appalled looks are justified.
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jesswritesthat · a month ago
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Nishinoya Yū: #4
Fandom: Haikyuu!! [ Masterlist ]
Summary: fluff, shenanigans
• Posing as a boy is all fun and volleyball games until you start crushing on your rival.
Warnings: Cursing, f!reader, ‘Shes the Man’ situation, 2.7k
>>>>—————————>
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You weren't supposed to be here.
On the court.
Wearing number 4 like you deserved it - yes it was yours but not here. Not now. Not with them.
"Hey, Libero, you good?" Your Captain cautiously inquired, aware of your feelings regarding your stand in position for the Inter-High Preliminaries.
"Uh - yeah, just nervous..."
"It's alright, we won't get caught (L/n). Even if we do, Shiratorizawa is in our table and we don't stand much of a chance against them anyway so don't worry okay." He reassured nudging you playfully, but regardless you were prepared to do the best for your school no matter the circumstances.
You'd played well as you always did, hearing the crowds gasp and applaud with each point, you'd receive balls at unfathomable speeds and threw in some Libero sets. Then there was your speciality, which stunned onlookers to silence much to your appraisal and that of your temporary teammates who then countered with the winning set point. It won you the day, but it wasn't enough to reach the Quarter Finals once getting beaten by Shiratorizawa.
You stood idly by afterwards, defeat still weighing heavy on your shoulders and awaiting the signal from your teammates. You couldn't exactly use the boys bathroom and if anyone saw you go into the female toilets to change, your cover would be blown.
Using a member of the schools female volleyball team to substitute? Not the brightest idea - especially when it was against regulations.
Hopelessly you sighed at the thought as well as the work you'd dedicated in altering your appearance (purely thankful for the oversized fit of Aisakas’ libero jersey he’d lent you) whilst your phone vibrated as you read [ All clear 🏃] but your hands barely grazed the female toilet door before you were interrupted.
"You do know that's the ladies room right?" The voice held wary suspicion, spinning to the origin whose brows furrowed slightly. Shit.
"A-ah?! You're right! I wasn't even looking..." Instinctively you hopped back, facing the Karasuno player with mild panic - did the lookout miss him due to his height?!
"Hey! You weren't trying to spy on Kiyoko because if so -"
"NO! Who the heck is that?!" Defensively waving your arms, you cut his threatening judgement off thanks to the real panic in your tone.
"Only the hottest manager ever - but I actually came to find you, you're amazing!" Even though his words were complimentary, the boy was now incredibly tense and kept stern eye contact with you the entire time.
"Me?!"
"I was watching you play and that move of yours is incredible, it takes real skill to take a hit from a powerful Spiker like Ushijima and you're fast enough to catch blocked rebounds. Maybe we could practice together, I'd love to show you my skills too. Uh - that's all!" With a quick nod, he spun on his heel and was going to make a beeline for the exit when you instinctively grabbed the hem of his orange jersey.
"Thank you, that - um, it means a lot. And I'd love that! We could train together next Saturday if you'd like um... ?" You allowed your excitement to distract you, immersed in the confidence-boosting exchange rather than attempting escape - only trailing off when lacking his name.
"Nishinoya Yū, and yours?"
"My - my name?" You stammered, realising you couldn't comply as giving your real one would compromise your position if he searched for it and found it under the girls team.
"(L/n)! What's taking so long - uh, oh no..." Your concerned Captain emerged from the corner, immediately noticing his mistake and falling over his callout in regret.
"(L/n) huh? Cool, see you at the Community Centre next Saturday at 11am!" Nishinoya grinned pridefully, waving as you only paled further looking to your Captain silently begging for help, though he drew an apologetic blank.
That was when it dawned on you - how you'd stupidly got caught up in Nishinoyas' easygoing whirlwind that you'd given in to him, no consideration spared toward your current identity crisis now you had scheduled plans for next week.
———
Anxiety was anticipated, Nishinoya was expecting your male equivalent afterall so what you were about to do was incredibly reckless... Plus, standing him up would be rather rude - especially if you had to fill in again at the Spring High Miyagi Prefecture Representative Playoffs.
"Yo (L/n- Ah sorry, wrong person... " Flustered, the Libero corrected himself with a sheepish hand to the back of his neck upon taking in your full appearance when he’d approached you. Although, you looked awfully similar to whom he'd believed you to be.
Moment of truth (Y/n).
But what if he brought it up to the Tournament officials though? Your team would be disqualified - you couldn't entrust him that so casually.
Moment of... improvisation then.
"Oh you must mean my brother, (L/n)-san..."
That's believable, an appropriate testimony despite the nagging guilt, you'll have to run with its spontaneous delivery. You continued with this painting, sporadically elaborating a plausible excuse to accommodate it:
"Yeah so... he couldn't make it - but I offered to come since I'm a Libero too. I'm (L/n) (Y/n)." Holding out your hand in causal greeting, you’re more than surprised when he'd bowed in its place with all-too-perfectly stiff posture.
"I - um - right! No worries I'd be honoured to be with you - train with you - uh Nishinoya Yū, at your service." The shy nature he was exhibiting was entirely unfamiliar, from what you'd seen of him around Karasuno and rival players he was excitedly vibrant - even when he'd met your 'male equivalent' he wasn't this nervous.
With a gracious smile adorning your lips, you instigated a lighthearted practice, Nishinoya gradually exposing his true nature having grown more comfortable over time. Though he was still easily succumbed by any compliments you’d issued, no matter the nonchalance of them.
"Can I give you my number, um - just in case you wanna do this again sometime? It was... fun - and productive obviously!" Was his hesitant inquiry once finishing up, prominent blush outlining his cheekbones that he could only hope you’d decipher as exhaustion.
"Y'know Nishinoya... you could've gone with - I have the coolest ringtone, text me so I can show you."
There was a processing pause, your sly smirk and witty line causing him to gulp a little - staring at you wide eyed with fingers falling from his hair in disbelief. Were you flirting with him? Or just being friendly? How was he supposed to answer - honestly maybe? This wasn’t like previous encounters with attractive people, he hadn’t hung out with Kiyoko like he had you, and he was afraid of ruining your perception of him so soon.
"Well I - um, I want you to have my number (L/n)-chan, so I know you're comfortable enough to text me." It was thoughtful you'd admit, better than getting pestered by someone if you'd given them your number and not truly liking them. But, you really liked Yū...
"Thanks, not many people think like that. You can call me (Y/n) by the way." With a gentle grin, you accepted and inputted his details into your phone whilst he apparently got splashed with a wave of confidence.
"Hey, my second choice was - I send the best good morning texts, you'd already know that if you had my number."
Your melodious laughter set him at ease, any regretful afterthought dismissed as he admired you with a subconsciously soft quirk of his lips.
"That's clever Nishinoya! I'll have to use that one!"
———
Now he wanted to send you a 'Good Morning' text, it'd certainly pave the way for a more friendly option but once typing your name into his phone - he realised he'd gifted you all of the power.
With a sympathetic sigh, he assumed he must've blown his chances considering it been 2 days since you’d practiced together - strangely enough this defeated him more than any of Kiyokos’ rejections, he supposed he must've unwittingly established a connection to you.
[ Unknown: You don't send the best morning texts after all, because I do. Good morning Yū! I hope you have a lovely day ✨ ]
[ Unknown: It's (Y/n) by the way! ]
Unknown —> (Y/n)-sama⚡️
[ Yū: Challenge accepted! Good morning (Y/n)-chan, I hope you have an even better day!! And, I'm really glad to hear from you! 🙌 ]
[ (Y/n)-sama⚡️: Man I've missed your good vibes, do you wanna practice again this week? ]
[ Yū: ✨Love to!✨]
The enthralling texts continued, both in the morning and late at night, filled with memes, jokes and updates exchanged frequently - as did your meetings.
They were tailored to incorporate Volleyball, each more effortless with one another now, playful touches were shared as well as casual conversation - both when at his side or across the court. He’d taught you ‘Rolling Thunder’ and you’d reciprocated with your move - wistfully promising to use his in your next match much to the appraisal of Yū.
"Wanna grab food from there? My treat of course (Y/n)." Spinning the volleyball on his fingertips, the teen gestured to the new cafe across the street.
"Sounds good Yū, but you have to let me get the next one."
Like a gentleman, he pulled out your seat before sitting down opposite you himself, wearing a blinding smile as you both spoke. It'd be the last time you could meet up before the Spring High-Miyagi Prefecture Representative Playoffs so you'd decided make the most of it. Afterall, you could be potential rivals in a few days since the male Libero was still out of commission - you still hadn’t told him.
"What number do you play by the way?" Yūs’ offhanded question shook your stupor, banishing the lingering lies raining over you like storm clouds.
"Number 4." Your eyes widened in recognition as you thoughtless admitted it, and Noya as observant as he was noticed the slight shyness in your display.
"Same as your brother then, what a coincidence!"
"O-oh yeah." Spluttering a response and desperately trying to swallow your drink without coughing, you winced at his exceeding memory and nodded along with a guilty conscience.
"And mine too! Since you and I share a jersey number, know that I'll be supporting you whenever you play (Y/n)!” Eagerly his palms were elevated, sparkling grin and closed eyes happily awaiting a High-10 from you.
"Even if our team colours are different, know that I'll do the same. I’ll be rooting for #4 Nishinoya at the Prefecture Playoffs~" Accompanying your sentiment was a clap of your respective hands, Noya blinking in surprise when your digits unexpectedly laced with his own and squeezed lightly as reassurance - you didn’t miss the vibrant scarlet at the tip of his ears, nor the innocent admiration brightening in his auburn irises once’s they flicked up from your intertwined hands. He couldn’t blame physical activity this time he supposed.
“I can’t lose then!”
———
Stalking the arena halls trailing behind your pumped teammates - temporary teammates - toward your next game, you understandably dwindled behind slightly.
"(L/n) wait up!" The surname? It'd been a while since that familiar voice addressed you so formally, had you upset him? Maybe the overcompensation of a Hi-10 scared him off last time...
As you considered the possibility you'd subconsciously shrugged the bunched jersey off your shoulders as the measurements were a little broader than your own - right, now you were posing as 'your nonexistent Libero brother' hence why. Nishinoya had never learned his first name since you’d skilfully dodged the subject.
"Sup' Nishinoya!" You hollered back, casual nod in greeting and voice an octave lower than usual.
"Hey been a while, I know we don't know each other well... but your sister, I mean we've been spending a lot of time together which you probably already know...” The brunette trailed off slightly, boldly wearing a confident facade but clearly considering his word choice toward your ‘brother’. “And I... I like her a lot."
"Oh uh - yeah, she's tolerable I guess." You offered a lacklustre shrug - Would a sibling say that? Or would throwing in a mocking insult be more believable?
"I was wondering (L/n)-san, could I have your blessing to ask (Y/n)-chan on a date?" Nishinoya bowed first, before meeting your eyes with a determination you’d only ever seen during Volleyball games.
"You wh-"
"Oi (L/n)! C'mon it's our semi final match! We've gotta get Shiratorizawa back for last time!" The Captains call was either a blessing (for subduing your threatening heat) or a curse (for pulling you from this ghost of luck).
Either way, you issue a quick apology to Karasunos’ Gaurdian who waved you off with a grin whilst you jogged up to your Captain. You had a game to focus on right now - not the fact the boy you liked just inadvertently requested permission to date you.
———
Defeat stung. Painful and festering. Not only had you lost to Shiratorizawa once, but twice, in the same year. Humiliating wouldn’t even begin to describe it, and though your team knew it was an overly harsh judgement, that didn’t nullify the pain. They’re the best in Miyagi, with a Top 3 Ace on their team - you did well to even dig a couple of Ushiwakas spikes.
Yet you continued to glare at yourself in the mirror of the female toilets, now in casual attire with the Aisakas’ libero kit slung over your shoulder.
Once last aggravated sigh and you left the toilet with —
"(L/n)-san...? Or rather, (Y/n)..."
"Yū?!" You’d significantly drained of colour, scanning the surrounding area with a degree of urgency to your movements. Shit - if you’re caught...
"You’re not, you and um..." He fell into an awestruck silence, his vague gestures expressing somewhat as your features were easily recognisable to him - enamouring even. Nishinoya hadn't regretted awaiting your exit -having just caught you entering the female toilets- but his feelings were currently warring. That was evident in his furrowing brows and the step he took backwards when you went to approach him which hurt more than you’d expect, like a stab to the gut and twisting the knife for added torture.
"Please don't tell anyone! I'm so sorry for deceiving you but after Aisaka-san —the guys Libero— got injured, they needed someone to replace him! They don't have many members and thought it'd be okay as long as no one found out I'm a girl. Please forgive me Yū. I’m so so sorry.”
Sincerely you bowed before him, missing the excited grin gracing his lips midway through your explanation due the sheer spontaneity - it's something he'd definitely do after all, so he couldn't see you as anything but cool. It was fearless and brave to him. Regardless of the contrasting guilty emotions you were currently overflowing with.
"No way! That's incredible (Y/n), I would've done the exact same! You were doing it for your friends, I understand that—“ Once bright and playful, he’d grabbed your shoulder with light radiating from his contentment until he cut himself off with a hesitant recollection of recent transpiring scenarios. “Aha - I just - crap I asked for your blessing?!"
An indescribable surge blazed past his irises for second, grip squeezing your shoulders prior to slipping from them in pure embarrassment. The Libero offered a soft laugh in its place with hands on hips and charismatic words failing him for the first time in a long while - thankfully the moment was interrupted by security.
"Only participants are allowed beyond this point so what's going on here?" The tall burly man stated between you both from a few metres away, scrutinising you in particular since Nishinoya donned Karasunos’ signature.
"Uh - I - I was just wishing my boyfriend good luck." You miraculously justified, the worker gave a bored sigh in response —likely having heard such an excuse many a time before— he briskly gestured to his watch instructing you hurry it up.
Quickly you placed a chasté kiss on Nishinoyas’ already flustered form due to your choice title, and when pulling away from the furiously blushing awestruck Libero, you gave a sheepish smile before speaking.
"Good luck out there in the Final, and please kick Shiratorizawas asses Yū. I'll be cheering for you okay~"
———
"What's got you all pumped?" Daichi sceptically questioned the boundless entrance of the approaching Libero, unnervingly far more invigorated than usual with prominent pink hues and a wide grin overcoming his expression as he spoke with confidence.
"My girlfriend just kissed me for luck - there's no way we can lose now, I won't let the ball touch the floor!"
"Pffffttt, yeah right Noya! Like you got a girlfriend in the last 10 minutes." Tanaka heartily clapped the Liberos back with a snigger even if it didn't diminish Nishinoyas spirit, his positive attitude shone brightly and quickly spread to his teammates like dominos.
"Not technically! But I can fix that after we win this tournament, so let's do it quick!"
This time he clocked you in the stands, offering a polite wave but what struck him the most was the Volleyball jersey draped over your clothes once again - proudly showcasing #4, even if not in his colours, he was beyond energised.
It's no wonder Shiratorizawa lost out on Nationals that day...
<——————————<<<<
[ Masterlist ]
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an-n-alyst · a month ago
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An Abundance of Anna
Sorry John Green, but I personally think An Abundance of Anna sounds way better than an Abundance of Katherines. Although I did enjoy the book.
I’m starting to notice a pattern these days wherein I continually beat myself up over stuff that really shouldn’t matter. Self criticism is one of the easiest things to fall into, and, IMO, one of the hardest things to own up to. We all have this ideal image of ourselves that we like to portray but on the inside, sometimes it’s just one big dumpster fire.
One of the healthiest and most cathartic things for me to do for myself is to sit back every now and then, evaluate and sort out my feelings into three things: the things I will work to improve about myself, the things I need to accept about myself, and the things I need to celebrate about myself. I find that the process helps extinguish the raging flames in my soul dumpster.
I’m not sorry if that sounded silly or ridiculous to you because *I* thought it was funny and that’s one of the things I need to celebrate about myself more often! I can make myself laugh pretty easily. I can even tickle my own feet. I love being eccentric and colorful because it makes me feel good. I love myself in that regard. I need to stop giving a shit about whether or not I come off as being a weirdo. People will love it or leave it and that’s fine.
I’ve always had friends but usually felt like I was that one friend in the group where it wouldn’t really matter whether I was there or not. That feeling tends to persist, unfortunately, to this day. I’m sure a lot of people can relate to this because despite me going on and on about how alone I may feel, I am cognizant of the fact that there are a lot of others out there in the same little raggedy boat as I am. Feeling perpetually like an outsider can be the basis for some very strong character development, but it can also instill weakness. I wish I could tell you I used it to become this badass independent woman who takes no shit and needs *nobody else* to make her feel worthy, but here comes one of those things that I need to accept about myself: I have a pointless and unnecessary need for reassurance and acceptance from others. There, I said it. The first step to solving a problem is to admit you have one, right? Acceptance. Once you can admit that you have that problem, you can strategize to overcome it. That’s the thing about acceptance - it ultimately it can lead to change and growth if you go about it the right way. You can sink or you can swim. And that’s when some of us choose to face that shit head on and come out the other side a stronger person, and others will get a regrettable tattoo. Don’t be that guy.
This is the shit that makes my soul dumpster explode into flames. I don’t know why I always feel like I need to hear that I’m doing a good job. I don’t know why I always worry about what other people are thinking about me, whether I said the right thing or not, whether everybody likes me and is happy with me...it’s exhausting. It affects my relationships. It makes me isolate and feel something similar to desperation and emotional blockage. It’s like I walk up to my on-fire-dumpster and start cramming heaps and heaps of garbage into it, just suffocating the living daylights out of myself and making the flames grow taller and taller. And then I stand there and just crap my pants freaking out about it and wondering how the heck that happened. It’s self sabotage. It’s so annoying.
But here’s the thing about that, Reader - I do have the power to change it and I think I need to start telling myself that more often. I do have the power to release negative emotions toward myself. I do have the power to control how I react toward others. I can choose to love myself and work toward that growth. And I know that what I’m saying sounds like the same cliches you tend to see all the time in, like, self-help books or those cringe FB memes from 2009, but I guess I’ll be corny and admit that there’s truth to it. Maybe if I start to celebrate myself more often then I won’t rely so much on the opinions of other people. Maybe if I can learn how to unravel my anxiety and cope with it better then I wouldn’t even have these moments of choking on metaphorical smoke. Maybe I need to be there for myself sometimes before I can be there for others.
I love who I am and I don’t regret anything that I’ve been through that’s helped create the person I am. I have a big heart that has one of the greatest capacities for love, like, ever. I am smart and I love to read and write. I love to tell stories and tell jokes, even if I’m the only one who laughs at them. I have made lots of mistakes and that’s okay! Not everyone is going to like me and consider me their friend, and as hard as it is for me to say, that is okay, too. Even though it may not seem like it sometimes, I love the friends and family I have now very much and even though I may be painfully introverted, I am always here for them and available for them. (I suck at texting back, though, let’s face it. Acceptance, y’all. Just call me.)
Being introspective is a good thing. Reflection is healthy and you can be critical of yourself without being unfair or unkind to yourself. You just have to find that balance. It’s moments like these I wish that I could simply pluck my brain out of my head, sit it on a stool and tell it “you’re doing a great job and you don’t need to be so uptight. You can relax. You should really be more cool with yourself and also probably start putting yourself out there more.” I could always make that into a morning mirror mantra, but that’s kind of a long one. I’d be late to work every day.
Anyway, thank you for coming to my Ted talk, all 10 of you who will probably end up reading this (including my mom, hi Mom!) I typically sign these off with a “Be well, have a good day” but I think today I’ll leave you with “Let’s be nice to ourselves today.” It seems more fitting.
P.S. Lately I’ve been eating better, working hard and tomorrow I take my test to become a licensed realtor and actually start doing something with my life and establishing my career. I’m very proud of myself and will continue to build myself up into someone I am proud of. I’m proud of me! Go me! I am validating myself and I am awesome. This was a very long P.S..
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what would online classes with Kaminari be like?
a/n: ahhhh i’m glad you asked! i love writing for this lightning bby so i gotchu, i added sero because he needs some love <3
pairings: denki kaminari, hanta sero x gn!reader
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ONLINE CLASSES WITH HANTA SERO AND DENKI KAMINARI
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⚡ DENKI KAMINARI  - *turns mic on, insert kaminari making moaning sounds*
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let’s be real for a second, ‘kay? NO ONE LIKES ONLINE CLASSES
I DON’T KNOW A SINGLE PERSON WHO DOES
HOHO AND KAMINARI
OH NO
he despises them
he’s that kid to have the weirdest virtual backgrounds and the one to be spamming the chat so that your teacher has to disable it
he’s the kid who has his video off and legitimately cannot focus for the heck of it, but he’s really responsive in breakout rooms
but hey! at least online classes with kaminari are NEVER boring
if you turn your mic on, he can and will start moaning into it while you’re in class
if you’re trying to get your homework, he’ll try to read every single word on your papers
if you’re trying to turn on your video, he can and will pop into the room and start waving in the background
but even though he might be annoying, he’s also such a sweetheart🥺
kaminari’ll probably also be taking extra classes in front of you or next to you, so your devices are next to each other
he’ll hold your hand under the table 🥺🥺🥺
and it’s SO cute when he swings his feet back and forth in the chair like a lil’ baby and he expects you to kick back oml
he’s a weird kid but he loves you so much it’s nearly impossible to explain in words
kaminari probably doesn’t understand most materials, so he’ll definitely be that kid looking in confusion in class and going “...what the f?” 😟
he’ll text you during class, even though you guys are right next to each other how confused he 
⚡lightning mcking: WHAT THE FOCK IS GOING ON
lightning mcoverlord: ?? kaminari, love, you’re supposed to be paying attention
⚡lightning mcking: can we go to Mcdonalds after this???
lightning mcoverlord: if we go to Mcdonalds, will you finally buckle down and do your work?
⚡lightning mcking: WAS THAT A VINE REFERENCE-
and whenever he sees you stressed because of assignments, don’t worry
...
THE BTCH IS CRYING WITH YOU
HE’S SOBBING NEXT TO YOU GOIN LIKE “TF IS GOING ON BABE”
you two will both be sobbing, shaking your heads and going “i don’t know i literally don’t know-”
if he sees that you really do need comfort though, he’ll get you a hoodie and wrap his arms around you and kiss your forehead. “you’re really smart, ya know that?”
“hey, celebrate the small things! at least you got me, and i’m the handsomest all around. come on, let’s go to mCDONAAALDS”
A Child™
but really, you make him feel like he’s on top of the world. he adores you. please don’t let him go.
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🖭 HANTA SERO - “you really gotta stop rehearsing saying the word here.”
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EVERYONE SHUT UP I LOVE HIM
on the days that you don’t want to get up from your bed to class, he’ll be the one to drag you off your bed by the foot
“come on! it’s time to get up!”
“mmm, five more minutes..”
“GET UP SWEETIE-”
he’s definitely going to be really patient with you though 🥺
he understands the days where you’re burnt-out or just really tired, so he’ll first kiss your knuckles and tell you, “hey! it’s another good day to test your limits. if you made through yesterday and all your worst days, i just know you can make it today. cooome on baby. let’s go.”
HE WILL SING TO YOU IN SPANISH IN THE MORNING✨✨
he’s such a romantic 
expect sero to make you breakfast and put a not there on the days he’s busy on how much he loves you 🥺<3
“good morning, my love! today’s gonna be a good day, and i’m right here for everything :D”
when you’re in online school and he’s working elsewhere, he’ll video call you
every single break without fail and send you memes
a LOT OF MEMES
A LOT OF MEMES THAT JUST DON’T MAKE SENSE
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but he really does want to brighten your day in anyway possible oml
OKAY BUT LITERALLY BOYFRIEND MATERIAL
he’s sweet, caring, funny, and GOOD LOOKING? LIKE COME GET Y’ALLS JUICE WTF
sero also makes sure that whenever you’re stressed, he gets you a glass of water and ruffles your hair
“you’re gonna be just fine. let’s take a break after class together, okay?you want me to doordash you some food? yeah, let’s do it, you look like you need it babe. coooome on. leeet’s go!”
he also likes playing with you hair and OH MY GOLLY
THE WAY HIS EYES SPARKLE
WHEN HE FEELS HOW SMOOTH IT IS
IT’S NOT EVEN FUNNY IT’S FORKIN’ ADORABLE AND HE’S JUST IN AWE 🥺🥺🥺
in conclusion, hanta sero and denki kaminari are the best boyfriends in the galaxy. please give them some love.
tag list!: @cherry-cake-pies, @cathwritestragediesnotsins, @renegadedeca, @msminsuga, or click here to be added to the fammmm
have a sexc night if you reblog, gorgeous ;) 
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hockeymaskkilla · a month ago
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If Fascium comes it come culturally and work it’s way up institutionally becuse we pride our selfs in virtues of freedom justice equality so you just can’t put right say were now a dictatorship deal with it.so instead it works slowly like with Covid there is a huge media panic create a righteous action to the The said so problem and create an evil side make the good and bad not subjective like the ying yang but of simple biblical or marvel heaven vs hell good vs bad guys create an us vs them.becuse most ppl are just blue pillers and just normies and that’s 90% of the population btw who just want to live there white fence suburban family lifestyle if happy Christmas and fear being socially judged will join you’re cause make the dissidents or the ppl who speak sense look evil use the words “ist or isium” or simple labels that hold a lot of power in shaming.for example when Edward snowden revaluations cane out the government were spying on all us all they had to say was the word its to protect the public from potential “terriousts” and becuse that word was used most ppl were fine with it becuse you can no longer stone ppl now so you try to stone them using launguage instead like “white supremacist” or the new one “phobia and phobic” so you use these bogey man words however if these words hold no power or the ppl don’t care and there actually using logic to convince ppl you then resort to making fun of them and ridiculing them.and playing the clown music dunce hating them and calling them tin foil hats becuse ppl also fear being made fun of becuse you can either lower ppls status in the form of demonisation or humiliation.and becuse most ppl don’t want to be put on the stake like witches or to become a meme of no matter how good there ideas are there still that loser who once did that thing you know taps into our high school side of things.so yeah ohhh you’re suspicious of the vaccine you must be those cooks who believe bills gates is putting chips on them heck even prop up these wacky conspiracy theorists like Alex Jones to make it embarrassing to assciate with or just make them the poster and ignore the more rational ppl.or the you don’t want to wear a mask you granny killing racist Nazi peadophile.and in time this grows and grows hire fact cheackers so when you do debate a conformist there like see I googled it and google says so as they shove the phone in you’re face.or as you’re being logical and mature in the debate they make sure to through a bunch of sarcastic comments in and wit becuse despite someone being smarter if you can clown them it works or you just scream the bogey man words and the logical person instead of saying so what or I don’t care has to keep explaining how he’s not that which put him in the defensive then in the offensive as they still scream these words anyways constantly.and this all works it’s way up culturally becuse it’s not the government who controls it’s public opinion and societal judgment that holds the true power and that’s what the who ever is planning this great reset knows.
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johnnys-green-pen · 2 months ago
For the character and letter meme - Captain Stanley and Q
Q. One missed call.
Fun fact: This one was originally a pain in the ass to write, but I actually really like the way it turned out. I think this one was the second prompt fic I attempted (or the first? Don’t recall if I started it before or after Catnap); the first draft was written with fountain pens. Did a second draft on the typewriter, and then a final revision while typing it up on PC, so this one needed a bit more TLC than usual... but oh man once I finally figured out what I was doing during the second draft, I was having an absolute blast with this.
This is also a loose continuation of the last “Cap and Mike deal with McConnike’s continued existence” fic. 
-----
The second Mike Stoker realized that the first few hours of his shift had been uncommonly pleasant and quiet, he should’ve known he was fucked. They were coming back from their second run that day - a simple grease fire, nothing major, and they’d been back at the station in the blink of an eye, clean-up included. And now he was looking forward to a nice, quiet lunch - or as nice as it got when Johnny was cooking, anyway. 
That nice, quiet lunch obviously never happened.
As they climbed off the engine and stepped into the rec room, Johnny greeted them with a cheerful “oh hey, Cap! McConnike called, said he wanted to talk to you”, and Hank froze so abruptly that Mike bumped straight into him and almost sent them both sprawling into the skinny paramedic. 
“Did he say why?” Hank asked. There was an odd, floaty quality to his voice that really didn't bode well. 
“Nope,” Johnny replied, twirling an oven mitt around his finger, seemingly not noticing his captain’s reaction, “just said we should tell you to call him back when you can. I didn’t really ask, though.”
“Oh no,” Hank muttered, staggered forward a few steps and sank down on one of the chairs around the kitchen table. “Oh, that can’t be good.”
Mike silently agreed, mostly just because it meant that Hank would be all over the place until he got that sorted out, but then again... McConnike seemed like a nice, jovial man, sure, but as long as Hank was so obviously scared of him and Mike didn’t know why, he didn’t trust the man for a single second. Heck, for all he knew the guy might single-handedly be responsible for Hank’s odd phobia of anyone with a higher rank than himself... not to mention that Mike hated seeing him like that, all frantically worried and uptight. It just wasn’t right. And so he resolved to keep an eye on his friend until the entire thing cleared up, just to be safe. More than he always did, anyway.
He figured it wouldn’t take long, in any case - after all, all Hank had to do was to pick up a phone and call the man back.
As it turned out, he hadn’t accounted for Hank’s incredible ability to fret and pace and argue himself into complete inactivity until he’d totally clammed up, without ever getting a single thing done.
And so, afternoon turned into evening and Hank didn’t say a word at the dinner table and his obvious unease was starting to put Johnny on edge, who’d seemingly picked up on the tense atmosphere without ever consciously noticing, and that confused the heck out of Chet and caused Roy to keep throwing his partner wary glances, and in the end the entire shift ended up feeling decidedly off, huddled around the big, square table and picking at their food, and that was a huge shame, really, because Mike had been looking forward to Marco’s excellent cooking paired with good company and pleasant conversation. 
Hank continued his pacing after dinner, trying to make his way into his office, probably, but turning back halfway, going back to the rec room door, turning on his heel again and walking back towards his office… and so on, and so forth, time and time again.
Mike’s patience was starting to wear a little thin by the time they were trying to sleep, because Hank still hadn’t picked up a phone and was now tossing and turning in his bunk, way too deep into his own head to come anywhere close to sleeping. Mike could hear long, graceful fingers tapping against the brick dividing walls between the bunks, against the edge of the bunk itself, even drumming against the mattress. Quiet, barely audible mutters of “I’m alright, I’m alright, it’s fine, everything’s fine...”
“Hank,” Mike finally hissed, “go to sleep!”
He heard the other man jolt, clearly startled, before the movements stilled. Mike was pretty sure Hank wouldn’t sleep that night.
He absolutely had to do something.
The night - regarding the tones going off, at least - was blissfully quiet, but come morning Hank still rolled out of bed looking like he hadn’t slept for even a single second in days, and was carrying the weight of the world on his lanky shoulders… which was equally heartwrenching and impressive, given that Hank’s little problem had started less than 24 hours ago. 
And so, Mike made a decision: He watched Hank putter into the washroom to brush his teeth and shave, and snuck into his office to call McConnike himself. He wasn’t entirely sure if Hank would thank him for that or have his head for it, but something had to be done, and he figured that, as Hank’s second-in-command and best friend, it was his solemn duty to do it.
The call ended up taking all of a minute, and left Mike shaking his head in exasperation. He went into the washroom to release Hank from his suffering, and found the man pacing yet again. Upon spotting Mike, Hank came over to him and looked at him with sad brown eyes.
“I think I know why McConnike called,” he said.
Mike knew the nice thing to do would be to interrupt his friend and tell him what he’d just learned, put an end to his anxiety, but he had to admit that he wasn’t exactly looking forward to Hank’s reaction and the latrine duty he was probably going to get as a natural consequence of overreaching like this - and besides, he really was terribly curious about what Hank thought he’d done. Heck, maybe Mike would even gain some insight into what exactly his friend’s issue was. And so he just raised an eyebrow and asked “oh?”
Hank dragged a hand through his hair, which stayed sticking up in all kinds of directions, his expressive, thick eyebrows creased with worry.
“Remember when I accidentally hit the Chief with a volleyball at the last department picnic? He must’ve finally figured out that it was me who did it. This is it! This is how my beautiful career ends! Squandered for a volleyball game we didn’t even win!” He sighed, and the genuine heartbreak reflected in his eyes was as touching as it was unnecessary. “Mike, it’s been such an honor working with you…”
Mike decided he’d heard enough then - he put a hand on his captain’s shoulder.
“Hank,” he said calmly, “let me talk for a minute, alright?”
Hank blinked at him, clearly confused, but he did shut up.
“First of all,” the engineer continued, “I’m pretty sure McConnike still thinks it was Johnny who nailed him with that volleyball. Second, he seemed more impressed than anything. Third, I figured I’d do you a favor and called him for you --” he skillfully ignored the way Hank’s shoulders tensed up under his hand, and the man’s wide-eyed, frantic deer-in-the-headlights look -- “and it’s actually just about the practice drill on Tuesday -- apparently it looks like we might get hit by a pretty bad storm around then, so they decided to reschedule it for next week.”
The terrified look turned incredulous.
“And that’s it?” Hank asked.
“That’s it. Apparently we were supposed to get a physical memo about it, but it ended up at 15’s again, so the Chief decided to just call us directly.”
“That man,” Hank groaned and leaned heavily on the sink, “has got to stop doing that.”
Mike wisely decided to keep his comments to himself, and merely patted his captain’s shoulder in a reassuring gesture. For the most part, he was just glad that Hank was going to be alright. 
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falling-through-pages · 2 months ago
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Sweet As Cinnamon
Gojo x Fem!Reader
Happy late Valentine's day
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Up the hill, around the corner, to the left. Past the neighbors dogs, around the donut shop, and finally, jump the fence in the alleyway tucked between the McDonald’s and KFC.
Right?
He couldn’t care less how long it would take him to get there, as long as he got there on time.
Time.
It was such a silly thing sometimes, like how he could always be late to his meetings with Mr.Yaga, or that one time he got sweets before checking up on Megumi and meeting Yuji.
Never had Satoru Gojo cared so much about being on time though. What was today? Valentine’s Day? 
A holiday originally intended for women to get whipped by naked men to cure them of being infertile, later romanticized by William Shakespeare, and finally, turned into a bargaining strategy to stuff corn syrup into the citizens and leech them of their money with over prised plushies and chocolates, now had value.
Oh yes, Satoru Gojo will be proposing today. For the meme, for the cliche, and for the lovely smile that would be on Y/n’s flustered face. 
Feet pounding into the concrete, he ran as fast as he could to the shared apartment; the surprise would be spoiled if he pulled up in his car. 
Quickly, he checked his watch- 3:00 a.m. Y/n would be sleeping by now.
Finally, he made it to the dor, fumbling with his keys and jolting inside.
The man peeled off his blindfold, rubbing his eyes. What was the recipe?
Flour, sugar, vanilla extract, yeast, cinnamon, cream cheese, eggs...he gathered it all, laying it on the kitchen island.
Tying a ‘Kiss The Cook’ apron on, he pulled out a stand mixer. What did Y/n say again?
“Tie your hair up idiot. I don’t wanna turn into a unicorn if I eat my hair.”
“But you’ll be a cute unicorn.”
“Just tie it up.”
And so he did. Sorting out the measurements. He grabbed a bowl, dumping 4 cups of flour and 2 and a half tablespoons of sugar, mixed it, added his softened butter, and mixed it again. 
Y/n sat on the table, cutting a big piece of a cinnamon roll before taking a bite.
“You really like those, huh?”
“Mhm! They’re super good!  It’s too bad I’m a crap baker though- otherwise I’d eat them everyday!”
Gojo let out a laugh, taking his fiance's fork and cutting a piece off for himself. It had a certain charm to it, the rolled dough was sweet, the icing sweeter. Perfect for any sweet tooth. 
“Hey! There’s plenty in the tray. This is MINE. No touchy!”
“But I want yours!”
“No!”
Done with the dough, he scraped it out of the mixer, putting it in another before covering to sit.
“Let’s see here...cinnamon, brown sugar, and mortucava sugar? What the heck is that? I’ll just use regular sugar. Sugar is sugar.”
Rolling his sleeves up, Gojo grabbed a whisk. It was now 3:45 a.m. Why the heck was he making these so early? 
Gojo came down stairs, rubbing his tired eyes. Y/n was in the kitchen, furiously mixing various things.
“Babe? The hell are you doing this early?”
She looked up at him, the flour on her nose evident.
“Did I wake you up? I’m sorry- I just felt like baking.”
“But why this early?”
“‘Cause it takes forever. So much waiting.But now that you’re awake, you can keep me company?”
The dough was now done, and the filling was ready. Lightly coating his table in flour, Gojo gathered the dough, plopping it on the table and started to knead it. His hands massaged the dough, rolling it into a ball before pulling out a rolling pin. 
“Satoru?”
“Hm?”
“Walk on my back?”
“Pardon?”
“My back hurts, and I can’t pop it. Please walk on my back.”
“Baby, I’d hurt your back more if I did. C’mere, lemme fix your back.”
“Thank youuu.”
Dough rolled out into a rectangle, the man gathered his filling, spreading it evenly across the dough, a warm smile on his lips. It was now 4:00 a.m., and Y/n would be up to get a glass of water soon. Quickly, Gojo rolled the dough into a tight tube, and cut it into 16 even pieces. Who listened to serving sizes anyway?
“No, no! That’s not how you do it, baby! You gotta be gentle or the dough’ll rip! You do it like this!” Y/n wedged herself between him and the counter, taking his hands into her own.
Looking up at him, she blew a loose strand of hair out of her face, smiling. 
“Pay attention.”
"Okay."
But Satoru escaped, opting to stare at Y/n.
"You're so pretty baby."
It was now 4:30 a.m., and Gojo had shoved the tray into the oven, cleaning his mess away as he heard footsteps on the stairs. Grabbing a cup of water, he placed it on the counter before hiding.
Rubbing her tired eyes, Y/n wandered in, waddling like a lost penguin, too out of it to question why a cup was ready, and went back upstairs. Sunrise would come soon, and Gojo was running out of time.After 15 minutes, he took the rolls out, excited that they came out so well.
“Ooh, Y/ns gonna be so happy!”
Opening the fridge, he got out the cream cheese and milk, beating it fast before adding the powdered sugar and vanilla extract. Once finished, he glazed the rolls, and placed them on the table.
Now all Satoru had to do was wait.
***
The alarm rang once, twice, three times before being slammed off. Y/n woke up, yawning and stretching. 
“What’s this smell?” 
Slipping on a pair of slippers, she quickly came down the stairs, a loud laugh coming from her.
Gojo, covered in flour, lay asleep on the counter, a fresh batch of cinnamon rolls beside him.
Patting him gently, she whispered in his ear.
“Baby...baby wake up. I can and will eat these all by myself if you don’t.”
Blue eyes opened, and the man smiled, rubbing his eyes.
“Happy Valentine’s day Y/n.”
@fyowyn-writes
@queenofcurses
@izuniias
@lethargicyashi
@ryoskuna
@sky-Luce-stellare
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artestst · 2 months ago
Text
accidentally insulting them
Main 3 boys x Reader
No one asked for this but yes✨
Summary: You didn't mean it? So your Going to make it up somehow.
Warnings: minor swearing
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oh yanno that meme where they said
"look how hard I can cry! Swfwfsfwfwfswf"
So he basically cried himself
until he saw no sun
I mean it all started with him saying
"[Name], did you know my last name is also going to be your last name someday? Bet you can't beat that!"
"Midoriya did you know your name is a joke? Like Midori is green in English and Kanji Plus your Main color palette is green so your name is a jok- Oh heck"
alright how do you cheer up a lost puppy???
he didn't even know that??
so how did you know?????
So because this had happened
"sO uhhhhhh, ochaco :)"
"hOw DiD yOu jUst pRonOunCed The smIley-"
Ochaco knows best
So ya know
You made him his favourite!!
"Katsudon?.."
"I didnt mean it. I'm really sorry Midoriya,,"
"haha no its fine! Did you make another? Come eat with me! Then I'll forgive you."
"Deal!"
ah fun times
Amiriteee Reddd
(stop putting me on screen)
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Todoroki is a hard one to insult
Not like you mean it
but like damn
What did you even do???
oH righttt
"Todoroki, If you can handle heat then why don't you go to the sun, Oh wait nevermind-"
"well I'm sorry, I didnt know That I'm supposed to go to the sun. Why don't you try it out? Oh wait! You'll die."
What a burn!
Get it??
Ok ill stop now
I'm just guessing
He thought you were Underestimating him
Yanno especially with his fire quirk
So you do what you do
"Todoroki? I'm really sorry! I didn't mean to be rude. I promise I'll make it up somehow!"
"Reaaally?"
"Yeah!"
"Alright, then Sunday, 9am at the Central park. Don't be late."
"waIt hUh????"
Surprise
Him getting mad is a joke
He did that for you to notice himm
hAhA the dating tips 102 books works
Anyways Congratulations on getting something more than you expected✨
(^there's a joke in there but I'm too young to understand - Tommyinnit)
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He's a tsundere
Literally
"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"
"ShuT uP [nAmE]"
"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"
"Alright what do you want?"
"hug me uwu?"
"dafuq?"
Your never getting it
He's just gonna make you beg for it until
"Alright fine. Todoroki?-"
"If you fukin' take one more step to that Water dispenser, I'll end you."
"*runs towards Todoroki*"
"SHJAAJ-"
its not that you insulted him
He just thinks he's not good enough :(
C'mon
He wants you to want him as much as he wants you
Of course you took notice of it
That is why you tease him alot
" Bakugou?, aaaaa-"
"what do you want now?"
"I stole Kaminari's console, Lets play!"
"tch, fine, I guess."
"HEcCcc Yeaa PopRocks 2.0!"
"huh?"
"NotHiNg"
Overall He just wants you
And you probably want him too
Have a good day bbz 💙💙
Blue is an idiot for Making this and her fukin jokes mannn just why??
Requestz are openzzss
-Red🔺
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michaelathisten · 2 months ago
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5 Types of Role Players Everybody Hates
For this post I decided to do something a little different and vent about the scourges of online role playing-not full on DnD but rather the stuff you do by text or in chat rooms. Now don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of awesome role players out there... but if you’ve tried any role playing before, you know that for every good one there are two bad ones-maybe even more. Obviously these are generalizations and not all characters fit neatly into one category; many fit in multiple. Some characters can even be good in some ways but awful in others... but without any further ado, let’s get into it!
THE CREEPYPASTA MARY SUE
They’re everywhere. They have hot topic written all over them and they have to be darker than every other edgelord in the room, which can lead to some pretty amusing (and cringeworthy) results. Now I’m all for a little edge-heck, a lot of edge-but these role players take it WAY too far. Their characters have been abandoned and abused, bullied by everyone, never known what love or friendship is-they swear they don’t know how to smile. Perhaps their surname is “the killer”. Their weapons? Chainsaws, knives, maybe the occasional gun-all bloodstained, of course. The dedicated may even eat human flesh for kicks. The weirdest thing about these characters is that they try to be as loathsome as possible and still wonder why they don’t have the awe and respect of everyone else in the room. Maybe killing a couple more NPCs (or even other players) in a fit of insanity will get their message across.
THE UWU
The reputation of these characters is infamous, but apparently no one playing these types got the memo. It may be the polar opposite of the Creepypasta Mary Sue, but that won’t stop half of them from being BOTH. These players will whine and whimper and cry alone in corners until someone showers them with the attention they’re soliciting so desperately. Unlike the former, however, instead of wearing their depression all over their faces they pretend to be sunshine and rainbows for a full ten minutes BEFORE they dump their tragic past on everyone. They, too, were abandoned, abused, bullied, etc. Some of them are weak as heck and need their love triangle to protect them; others have secret op magic abilities that make them the center of the universe. In place of grammar and punctuation, they add “uwu”, “owo”, or some other variation to every other dialogue bubble. And don’t forget their trademark *blushes and turns away*.
THE ONE TURN KILL
Oh, boy. These are the characters who play god by killing your character in one chat bubble. They have all the superpowers they feel like making up as they go and they flex those powers every chance they get. You think your character’s strong? Well, they’ll throw a useless comparison or deus ex at you real quick. “No, my character’s ten times as strong as yours!” “No, I dodged that before you could hit me.” “No, my character isn’t even trying right now. They’re bored of how weak everyone else is no one even gives them a challenge-” you get the idea. And if you want to introduce a villain to the story, don’t bother-they’ll kill them in one hit too without even blinking. But it’s not enough to be the self-acclaimed strongest of all time--they won’t stop flexing until everyone else admits it too. Which is never.
THE CREEP
Here’s where any story can take a quick turn for the worst. These are the characters that are not only creepy-they get to control everyone else’s characters to cater to their sick desires! Kind of like the One Turn Killers, but... more perverse. The mild ones type about how your character secretly has a crush on them. The ones in the middle of the spectrum will make advances, verbally or physically. The extreme ones... well, we don’t talk about the extreme ones. (This is starting to sound dismally close to real life...) The worst case scenario is when you’re stuck with them in a group role play cause you can’t just ignore them and move on. If you’re invested enough in the story or the other players to stick with the group, they’ll be there too, ruining everything. Unlike the other types on this list there’s nothing that can save a creep. They’re just a drag on the whole game.
THE CHAT KILLER
This is less in character and more outside the game. These players hardly interact with the story at all and just spam memes and say “chat’s dead” “chat’s dead” until they make it annoying enough that it eventually comes true. Some of them are trolls, others are just trying to make small talk... but either way it kills the atmosphere, if not literally the role play itself.
Wrapping Up
Well, writing this gave me plenty of ptsd. What about you guys? Any role plays gone wrong you want to tell me about? Anyway, despite all these problems (and many more), at the end of the day role playing is telling a collaborative story. It can crash and burn, and most of the time it will, but there are some that take your characters-and you by extension-on crazy adventures you would never otherwise be able to experience. A lot of the bonds formed between imaginary characters become friendships in real life. Because of that, I keep going back to role playing, even though I usually have to do some digging to find another good one.
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