#above all i really should be patient with myself. if i don't get it finished today then that's alright.

[ponyosmom35]

you don't like me, I don't like you

Simon Ghost Riley x reader

Liability series chapter two!

Synopsis: Reader is new, she's a medic whom is strictly on base. She is not enlisted in the military. She's there due to her older sisters training for Taskforce 141, her sister made a deal with Laswell, the pair were a packaged deal. Ghost hasn't been taking her arrival well as he feels like she's a waste of space. He is not afraid to let her know for the second time since they've met.

warnings: enemies to lovers, cursing, ghost is scary, reader is stubborn

Link to full Liability series:

https://www.tumblr.com/ponyosmom35/733401347573088256/simon-ghost-riley?source=share

After finally finishing the last part of the report Ghost sighs and closes his computer. It was nearly 3 am and he was exhausted. He stands up, stretching his sore limbs slightly, and walks to his door, he shuts the light off and closes it behind him, locking it. In the distance, he could hear banging. He frowns knowing that it was lights out, so nobody should be awake. He notices the light coming from the training center and walks in angrily. He notices the new medic. Younger sister of Sergeant Emma James, one of the finest in the training program. Price had her transferred to his base so he could keep an eye on her, testing to see if she’d be a good fit for 141. He was unsure why Laswell had requested her medic sister be transferred as well. The girl had been nothing but a pain in his ass from the moment she arrived. She didn’t belong there, what use was a medic if she was strictly on base, no military experience.  He scoffs as he notices her incorrect form as she punches the bag over and over, her stance was off and her hands weren’t even taped correctly. He stomps over to her and turns off the music she had playing in the background. She whips around and glares at him angrily. 

“What the fuck are you doing?” she demands, snatching the speaker from him

“You shouldn’t be out here, its light out”

“I don’t care” 

“Go back to your room, no one is allowed out here”

“Then why are you here?” she questions, staring at him with raised eyebrows 

“The rules don’t apply to me”

“So you’re above it all now?” she asks sarcastically 

“I’m the Lieutenant” he deadpans 

“I don’t really care to be honest” 

“Listen, I don't think you understand. You don't belong here. You're not a solider. You are a medic. So, get back to your rom and stay there. Otherwise, I'm going to have to report you to Captain Price for insubordination. Do I make myself clear?” Ghost warns, his tone incredibly threatening. It takes everything in her not to show her fear.  

“I’m not enlisted in the military”

“Listen, you may work for Laswell, but you're still on a military base, and that makes you subject to military law. Go to your room, or I will order the guards to take you there myself. Understood?”

“what guards Luitentant? looks like it’s just you and me here” she says gesturing to the empty room.

“Don't test me, medic. Just go back to your room, and don't come out until morning. Is that a clear enough order for you?”

“like I said, I don't take orders from you Ghost” she sneers 

“You're making a mistake. Let me spell it out for you, Either you agree to do what I say and when I say it, or I'll call Laswell and have her pull you out of this task force and send you back to the states. Is that clear?”

“First you bitch about my lack of training, now you're bitching at me to go to bed! make up your goddamn mind!”

“So that's your attitude then? Fine, I'll call Laswell right now and explain the situation. There’s an endless amount of army medics who do us good in the field. You’re easy to replace”

“fuck you” she says as she tries to push past him, making sure to hit him with her shoulder

“Listen!” he snaps, grabbing her arm and pull her back towards him, his tone growing more serious as his expression darkens.

“ I've been trying to be patient with you, but that time is over. Now listen up, because I'm going to say this once. You are here because you're part of a team and you're expected to behave like it. And that means doing what I say, no questions asked. Do you understand?”

“If I say yes will you finally shut the fuck up?”

“I wasn't finished speaking, and you will show a little more respect to me and this unit. Now, I asked you a question. Do you understand?”

“yes! I heard you perfectly clear” she responds as she turns her back on him and walks towards the sleeping quarters. 

“Fucking hell” 

-

The next morning Ghost had asked Soap to bring her to his office the next morning. He could not have her behave that way around the others. Disrespect was not permitted here. Someone needed to teach her. It dones’t take long for a knock to appear at his door. 

“Come in” he yells gruffly 

Soap opens the door for her and pats her on the shoulder gently. He sends Ghost a look before shutting it behind him. Ghost motions for her to enter and sit down at the chair across from his desk. “Now that you’ve slept on it, what have you got to say for yourself? I hope you've got a real good excuse for that behavior last night”

“what do you want me to say? want me to tell you I'm on my period or that I'm just that naturally charming?” she says sarcastically, her arms crossed as she sits down. 

“What I want to know is why you thought it was okay to go against direct orders from a superior officer”

“I see that we're going in circles here, so why don't we just cut the shit. you don't like me, I don't like you. For whatever reason you've been out to get me since I got here. Look man I'm just trying to do my job, so if you want me to stop 'defying orders'”  she quotes him sarcastically “then you should just let me do what I came here to”

“You don't get it, do you? It has nothing to do with me not liking you or some personal vendetta that you think I have against you. The fact of the matter is, you're not qualified to be a part of this operation. You don't have the training, skills, or experience to handle yourself in a dangerous situation. What you're doing is putting yourself and other members of the task force at risk, and I'm not going to tolerate it.”

“my position has nothing to do with the field, I'm strictly on base!” she exclaims 

“That is not the point. You're still on duty, and you're still responsible for the safety and well-being of the task force. You're a liability, not a help, when it comes down to it. If we need an immediate evac and the other actual medics are already in the field then what? we send you in because you're all we got. The last thing I need right now is to worry about keeping you safe instead of focusing on the mission. So, do you understand why you're nothing but a burden to me on this task force?”

“I've been called many things in my life, but never a burden. that's a new one thanks Ghost you truly never fail to surprise me! But you aren't gonna bully me out of here. Laswell wanted me here and I'm gonna do my job” she says standing “Also for future reference, the medic that could be saving your life one day really isn't the person to piss off”

“Oh trust me, I'm well aware” his skull-covered face inching closer as he leaned forward, his dark eyes boring into hers. She stands tall and refuses to let him see how truly nervous he made her. ”But while we're giving life advice, let me give you some. If I were you, I would be very careful about who you choose to piss off. Because if I have to deal with your bullshit again, I'll make sure you regret it. Is that clear?”

She salutes him sarcastically and walks out the door. Ghost rolls his eyes and sighs in frustration. 

“Bloody hell” he murmurs before going back to his paperwork. 

#smut #cod mw2 #ghost call of duty #ghost cod #mw2 #simon ghost riley #simon ghost x you #simon riley #angst #cod x reader #simon ghost x reader #simon riley x you #simon riley x reader #cod ghost #cod mwii #call of duty #modern warfare #modern warfare 2 #mwii #call of duty modern warfare 2 #ghost #cod #enemies to friends to lovers #enemies to lovers #eventual smut #ghost simon riley #simon riley call of duty #simon riley ghost #call of duty x reader #call of duty modern warfare

[cassiaslair]

from i prevail's album, trauma ( 2019 ). slightly modified to fit dialogue prompts. if it's in parentheses, feel free to omit it.

bow down.

get on your knees & bow down.

i come alive, i'll survive, take on anything.

so paint a target on my back, let 'em come to me.

i'm on another level that you'll never reach.

if you seek forgiveness, you'll get nothing from me.

you will never know, it's the price i pay.

look into my eyes, we are not the same.

i'm in control, & you'll know my name.

i gave my life, gave it everything.

the best of your best ain't good enough.

keep running your mouth, & i'ma call your bluff.

so... i had this dream, it meant everything, & i watched it come alive.

i let you in, underneath my skin, & i learned to love the lies.

now i lay awake & i contemplate... have i become what i hate?

would you go to war? would you die for it?

paranoid.

something isn't right, i feel it in my bones.

every time i look around, it follows me home.

i get so stressed out when my head gets loud.

all this emptiness inside, i can't fill the void in my mind.

sometimes i just wanna die (wish that i could tell you why).

is it all inside my head?

i just can't escape the noise.

i think i'm paranoid.

every time you leave.

all i ever wanted was to find someone.

holding it together is the hardest part.

every time you leave, i lose a little piece of me.

every time we speak, words don't do it justice.

it's just us from here.

finishing the puzzle is the hardest part.

everyday wishin' you could stay, 'cause our minds may change, but our hearts remain.

i can't believe you gotta go away again.

if you ever start to hesitate & you feel the weight, it starts to break.

we're not the same; know that this means everything to me.

no one said life gets in the way.

rise above it.

i've been patiently waiting, tying my stomach in knots.

i've been lost in the moment, going to war with my thoughts.

if you're feeling the pressure, the pressure's all that i got.

so if you think you're ready, i'm here to tell you you're not.

you're in over your head.

i'll be damned if i ever let you get me again.

i will stop at nothing 'cause i was made to rise above it.

one of these days, everyone will know (but for now i stand alone).

i count my enemies like trophies.

i've got nothing left to prove.

when i look at you, all i see are trophies.

i'm not afraid to put it all on the line (like it runs in my veins).

you cannot stop me, so don't even try.

breaking down.

i think... i think too much.

i'm a little bit paranoid.

i think i'm breaking (down).

maybe it's in my blood.

hate every single second, minute, hour, every day.

everybody's out to get you.

every time they ask me, i just tell 'em that i'm fine.

i try to hide my demons, but they only multiply.

everybody fucking hates you.

i say i'm feeling hopeless, but no one's listening.

i don't really like myself.

DOA.

on our knees, we pray as we waste away.

we dig our grave, dead on arrival.

i close my eyes & contemplate on why i chose to be great.

i find myself trying to escape from where i'm supposed to be safe.

maybe i should pray like i'm supposed to be saved.

sometimes i feel like getting even, but i choose to behave.

i'm mentally locked in a prison (& i need bail).

i wish i was more flourished. i wish i had more courage.

i wonder if it's all worth it (i wonder...).

dead is the land of the free.

am i not worth saving?

gasoline.

let's burn it fucking down.

back from the dead to tell you that i'm alive.

killed the old way (but i survived).

fuck the blueprint.

death or exile, you decide.

tell 'em all that i made my name.

now it's mine to send up in flames.

this right here is as far as you go.

this right here is where i lose control.

burn it all down, i don't give a fuck.

fuck what they say, fuck everything.

kill it all (kill everything).

nothing but red inside when i close my eyes.

break or bow down, you decide.

tell 'em all that you can't be saved.

tell 'em all that you dug this grave.

learn to live in this mess you made.

hurricane.

tell me i was never good enough.

remind me of the demons that i've been running from.

tell me who the hell you thought i was.

just blame it on the person, the person i've become.

lately, i don't give a fuck.

i can't be myself when i'm with anyone.

(&) maybe, i'm already gone.

i'll never be the same.

it hit me like a hurricane.

i don't know why i drown my mind (in everything they say).

it got the best of me.

tell me that i'm lost inside my mind.

i reach out, but it's pulling me under.

remind me i've been searching for something i won't find.

tell me i was never worth the time.

just blame it on the person you think i left behind.

look into my eyes.

believe me that the storm is coming.

let me be sad.

i'm holding back right now.

('cause) i'm numb to what's around.

i miss the life i used to have (with you right here).

now everything is turning grey.

i'm blacking out the shades for now.

let me be sad.

let me be sad, even for a little while. just a chance to catch my breath.

let me be sad, even for a little while, 'cause it's all that i have left.

can you see it in my eyes, i've been distant?

i can't tell if it's the end or the beginning.

i know i haven't been myself, i'll admit it.

i put up walls so if i burned any bridges, just know i'm doing everything i can to try & fix it (but knowing me i'll probably miss it).

these voices get so vicious.

feels like i'm ripping stitches.

i wish some days i could go back (before life changed, it was so fast).

that time is gone, & i know that (so please, let me be sad).

when all i see are memories, i don't wanna lose a thing.

low.

i'm so damn low.

i can't lie, i'm falling (the floor gave out again).

the walls are caving in.

i've got these voices in my head.

i don't know why i'm broken.

my world is sinking in.

they tell me that i'm not enough.

is it my time?

even when i'm high, i still feel low.

voices in my head won't leave me alone.

i keep falling.

i'm in over my head again.

i'm on my own, i know it.

i think i'm too far gone to save.

i can't let go. i'm holding, i feel it slip away.

the more they say, the more they cut.

i'm hanging by a thread (don't know if i let go).

i'm doing everything i can to fix the problem.

this is how it feels when you hit rock bottom.

deadweight.

i'm cutting out the deadweight.

let me take a second to get this through to you.

it's time you get put in the rearview.

cut ties, there's nothing left to your lies, i'm seeing right through.

let me lay it out so it's clear for you to see.

i'm done with the ones that don't believe.

i'm cutting out the ones who drag me down.

all this negativity weighing down on me.

admit it's so pathetic to think i'd carry you.

i'd rather watch all the lows you sink to.

now i can see what you're really all about.

turn your back & run your mouth.

i laugh at all the time you wasted.

you're bitter, i can fucking taste it.

so if you think that you can drag me down, it's gonna come back around.

keep it up, motherfucker (i'll cut you out).

i don't belong here.

'cause i don't belong here.

those days, it was all i wanted.

nowadays, it feels all the same.

used to stare at my bedroom ceiling wishing everything would change.

now it's hard when you're always searching for the life that you left behind.

time disappears, year after year.

how the hell did i get here?

i feel so far away.

minutes turn to hours & the hours into days.

i gave up everything.

you don't know what you got until you throw it all away.

looking back on the past, all the time i wasted...

i'm running from everyone that tells me that i'm fading out.

must be mistaken 'cause i don't feel anything.

you know i got this brain, it drives me insane.

some days i feel i can't take the pain.

i can't explain it 'cause i don't need anything.

#inbox prompt #inbox prompts #ask meme #ask memes #ask prompt #rp prompt #rp prompts #inbox memes #rp memes #rp ask meme #sentence starters #roleplay prompts #roleplay prompt #long post #this is one of my favorite bands and favorite albums of all time #and it means very much to me and i thought i'd put the lyrics into a prompt post #mostly for my own benefit but #i also wanted to share #this album is so cathartic and healing imo. like for me personally. #if anyone else enjoys this band or this type of music i hope it heals you too #and provides good content for your writing <3

[catt-leya]

Prompt 87. With rick please!!

Smutty May 16.05.

Pride (18+) || Rick Grimes

The fic has become something nice and short 😘

"It’s hot when you talk back."

Summary: You are stuck in a tree and can't get down without help, your rescue happens to come along.

Frustrated, I let my back sink against the tree trunk and stare down. I sit about 10 feet above the ground and do not come down.

When I passed the tree, I saw a small cat sitting on the tree and I didn't have the heart to go on.

So, I climbed up the tree and the lowest branch broke off and I couldn't get down again.

If that wasn't enough, the cat didn't want to be rescued at all and backed away from me until it jumped from the tree and landed elegantly on all fours, which you probably wouldn't expect from me if I really decided to jump 10 feet.

I'm really not far from Alexandria, because all I really wanted to do was take a little walk, but I also have no idea when someone would come by here and how long I would probably be stuck here, so I cross my arms in front of my chest and wait.

I can call badly, otherwise I scream all Walkers in the environment together, therefore I remain simply mutely sitting.

I have no idea how much time has passed when I hear soft footsteps and immediately sit up to catch a glimpse of the hopefully alive person.

I groan in relief when I see our leader Rick walking around a bush and call out, "Rick! God, am I glad to see you!"

I've probably never seen him so confused in my entire life as the moment our eyes meet and he sees me crouching in the tree.

His arms hang beside his body as he raises his eyebrows so high, they almost reach the base of his hair as he asks, "Why the hell are you sitting in a tree? Or you know what, I probably don't even want to know."

In fact, I have a knack for getting into questionable situations more often than not, so I shrug, "I was trying to save a cat."

His septic look is joined by a big grin, "You were going to save a CAT? And now you're stuck yourself, aren't you?"

I nod and he sighs softly.

Of course, he wouldn't let me sit up here, so he leans his rifle against the tree and then looks at me again, "What were you doing out here anyway? I don't think you're registered for anything outside of Alexandria."

I lean forward and rest my chin on my hands as I reply, "I just wanted to get out for a bit and unfortunately I can't get back without your help though."

I see Rick nod and take a closer look at the tree. If he's looking for a way up, though, he can wait a long time.

Snippily, I mutter, "Don't you think I would have come down myself if there was a way across the tree?"

I can literally feel him roll his eyes and then lean his back against the tree, "And don't you think you should be nicer to the only person who can get you down there anytime soon?"

True.

So, I wait patiently until he finishes his lap around the tree and then looks back at me, "There's really no way."

I can't suppress a loud, "Told you."

He pinches the root of his nose before sighing, "You'll have to jump. It's not that high."

Immediately I shake my head and cross my arms in front of my chest, "Sure. I jump a good 10 feet into the deep and break my bones. I would have thought of that myself and I certainly don't need you here."

Frustrated, he throws his arms in the air and hisses, "Would you at least listen to me to the end before you talk back to everything I do?"

I actually get along great with Rick and I'd say we're good friends, but I'm irritated as hell about the whole thing and my impatience is starting to rub off on Rick, who's not used to anyone talking to him the way I'm doing.

But since he really isn't stupid, I mumble an apology and wait for him to explain his glorious plan.

He stands directly under me and then says, "You jump and I'll catch you. It's maybe a little more than a foot you'd fall and then I've got you."

Skeptically, I look down and assess how tall Rick is and if he would really be able to catch me.

Not that I don't trust him, but I'm very attached to my healthy bones and it's not that bad up in the tree.

A little meekly I mutter, "Can't you just get a box or something and stand on it and get me down that way."

Rick tilts his head, as I've seen him do so many times before, and asks, "Are you really scared? I swear to you that I won't let you fall. Ever."

Briefly, I let my gaze wander through the forest and know that I have no other choice.

So, I swing my legs to one side and grit my teeth, "Please, Rick."

I've never sounded so pathetic in my life, and I notice the slight gloating that was evident in his eyes before completely disappear, and he spreads his arms and assures me, "I promise. Just let yourself go."

I take a deep breath and close my eyes before I just slide off the branch, thinking for maybe half a second that he can't hold me.

But by then I can feel his strong arms around my waist and I reach for his shoulders in a panic to steady myself in case he wouldn't be able to hold me after all.

But when I open my eyes again, he sets me down gently on the floor, but without letting go of my hip, and asks softly, "Are you okay?"

The sudden closeness to him irritates me at first and I just stare at him.

He's so close to me that I could count every gray strand in his beard, and he tilts his head slightly again as he mutters, "Why are you staring at me like that?"

I don't really know myself, but I just can't take my eyes off him and I whisper, "Thank you."

This would be the moment when he should let go of me and I should take my arms off his broad shoulders, but I'm frozen to the spot and he makes no move to put some distance between us either.

His bright blue eyes bore into mine and I feel like I can't breathe.

I desperately need to say something and would have liked to smack myself when I hear how unfamiliar my voice is high, "I'm sorry I was so stupid to you earlier."

His lips part slightly and immediately my eyes are glued to his mouth as his full lips form the words, "You don't have to apologize. It's hot when you talk back."

Thinking I've misheard, I tear my gaze back up to his eyes and croak, "What?"

He lowers his chin a bit and looks at me a little languidly, "You heard me right."

His words sound sluggish and I notice my heart beating faster and faster in my chest.

Rick thinks I'm hot.

And as unexpected as it is for me to hear him say it, I'm ready for whatever would follow.

Normally at this moment I would be waiting for the male part to take sail, but it's probably a mixture of desire and adrenaline from that little jump that I pull Rick down to me by the nape of his neck and he allows me to press my lips to his without resistance.

I have no idea what's going on in his head, or what I'm actually thinking, but I let him push me backwards until my back is pressed against the tree I was sitting on not long ago.

His lips are pressed urgently against mine, and Rick presses his hips against me so I can feel the hardness in his pants against my stomach.

I'm a bundle of sensation and moan softly into the kiss as he forces his tongue into my mouth and I can finally taste him in my mouth.

I frantically slide my hands over his torso and want to reach for his belt, but he quickly grabs my wrists and breaks away from me to stare at me, breathing heavily.

He blinks a few times before murmuring harshly, "Don't."

I drop my head to the tree behind me and lick my swollen lips, "Why not? I want you, Rick. I want everything from you."

I'm surprised myself at how easily the truth escapes my lips and I'm thrilled that his grip loosens a little, but I still can't break free of him.

He looks like it's confused himself why he's rejecting me, but he shakes his head anyway, "Not here in the middle of the woods. I want it to be nice."

Slowly, I nod and sigh, "Okay."

Gently he presses another kiss to my lips and then whispers, "You're special and I want to do it right."

Again, I nod and whisper harshly, "Okay."

Who would have thought that stupid cat had brought me to this moment?

@positive-squid @hail-yourselves @mrsxreeves

#smutty may #rick grimes #rick grimes x reader #twd #rick grimes imagine #rick grimes smut #twd x reader #the walking dead #request

[ferris-the-wheel]

Professor!(m!)reader series [Part 1]

A/N: Hell yeah, I'm so amazing, I finally got around to making this series :) Praise me/jjj Me realizing I have to add this to the masterlist O>O

Disclaimer: All "relationships" are purely platonic (both toward students and other professors).

ೃ⁀➷ Reader is aged up (is fairly young but not student age— 22+)

ೃ⁀➷💛/🩵

ೃ⁀➷ Is proofread, but please ignore any missed mistakes

TW: None

You sighed, running a hand through your hair, slightly messing it up. You scanned the room, which was fairly empty; only containing the podium that you were standing at, the chalkboard behind you, your desk, some bookshelves with textbooks against the wall near the door, and twenty-some-odd desks in neat rows on the other end of the room. The windows on the left side of the room provided a majority of the light in the room since the lamps that hung from the ceiling needed repairing after years of neglect.

The bell clanged above you and you prepared for what you hoped would be an easy class period. You made a mental note to ask some fellow staff members for any spare furnishings that you could use. You waited patiently for the first few students to pass through the doors.

"You can sit wherever you want." You said. You grew weary of trying to keep track of the rest of the students that came in, settling for memorizing them during the class period. The bell rang again, signaling the start of class. You did a headcount, deciding that there was an appropriate amount of students, then frowned. Guess it's time to introduce myself.

"Hello, I'm Professor L/N. I joined the faculty here at the start of the school year. You should all know what you signed up for when you decided to take this class as it's an elective class and not a core class. But for those who didn't bother to read into what this course will cover, let me explain. This class is Unique Magic Training, which should be self-explanatory: I teach you how to master or at least improve your unique magics. It's a year long course, but if you don't end up liking it, you can transfer out after midterms. Part of this course will take place in this classroom for tests and such, though it also can serve as a study period, while the other portion will take place in the gym. If there are any questions, ask them now."

There were a few murmers, but that was probably to be expected. No legitimate questions were asked, so you decided to continue. "Well, all the writing you have to do today is just filling out a form and turning it in. The questions on the form are along the lines of 'What is your unique magic?' and things like that, so you shouldn't have much of a problem with it. After you're done, just put it on my desk and you're done." Deeming that the instructions you gave were sufficient, you moved a stack of papers from a drawer in your desk to the bare surface. The students shuffled forward in a disorderly line, grabbed a paper, and sat back down.

Once the class was occupied filling out their forms, you pulled out your small notebook and began making a list of the things you would request for furnishings. You added new lights and desk top things to the list, then flipped the page over. You had been observing the students and their mannerisms, noting which ones would likely drop from the class after the halfway point. It seemed to be just the lazier ones that hung out in the back. You closed the notebook and slid it back into your desk drawer.

. . .

"Now that everyone's turned their forms, I'd like to say a few things." You began, pausing to get everyone's attention while moving toward the podium. "To be honest, whether you show up to this class or not is your choice. I'll teach whoever shows up. It's not my problem if you get in trouble for skipping. I also don't really care what you do during the periods where we're in this classroom as long as you aren't being a nuisance. Once again, it's your grade and I'll grade you accordingly." You finished, forming the filled-out forms into a neat stack and setting them off to the side.

A student with long dark hair raised his hand. "I have a question. And I'm Jamil Viper, sir. What kind of class is this? What I mean is that you mentioned that a portion of our classes here will take place in the gym, so I assumed that we'd be doing some kind of hands-on practice as well as studying." You noticed that he said it more like a statement toward the end, like he already knew the answer. "Yes, Viper, you're correct. This course centers around both hands-on experience and studying. If I'm honest, most classes will take place in the gym, the only time we'll really have class in here is when the gym is occupied or if the majority of the class has studying to do." You replied.

Jamil nodded. Another hand raised, toward the left side of the class. "Yes?" You prompted. "Trey Clover, sir." You figured that at least he should be easy to remember as he was the only one who had green hair in the classroom. "You said that you'll be training all of us to improve our unique magics, but how would that work since no two unique magics are exactly the same? Wouldn't it be difficult to train all of us separately at the same time? And since everyone here is likely at different levels in regards to that?" A smart question.

"That's why I had you fill out the forms. The questions will provide me with the information I need to better formulate a plan. But that's for tomorrow. Are there any more questions?" You added, looking around. A wolf beastman lifted his hand high in the air. Well he's quite eager...

"Jack Howl. Can you explain how you'll be deciding grades? Since the class is more hands-on, would it be similar to how we're graded in other hands-on classes such as flight class?" You took a moment to think. "Well, I'm not sure how other professors grade their students, but mine is pretty straightforward. You get good grades for listening to instructions, participating, at least putting on some effort, and not causing problems for me. On the other hand, if all you do in my class is mess around, your grade will reflect that."

You saw his quite large ears flick backward for a moment, not that you're fluent in wolf body language, so you weren't too sure what that meant. But given his serious face and the fact that he had asked a legitimately sensual question, you decided that he didn't seem the problematic type. Since no one else raised their hand, you sat back down, which seemed to be a signal for a low chatter to start up. Well, as long as no one starts a fire or anything...

. . .

"How have your classes gone so far?" Trein asked, you suspected out of curtesy since you were the only two in the staff room. You gave a noncommittal shrug. "It was pretty tame. Are the students usually so... normal here? I expected to have at least one or two troublemakers by now." You admitted, sitting down with a sigh, putting your lunch down on a table and leaning back in a semi-comfortable wooden chair.

Trein nodded, almost in a grave way, folding his arms with a frown on his face. That... didn't bode well. "I expect that most of the obvious troublemakers will be amongst the freshmen, so you shouldn't have to worry much."

" 'Obvious troublemakers'?"

"In my personal experiences, some students may seem fairly normal and unproblematic but later on turn out to be the opposite. You may get a feeling about someone but shake it off since they seem normal, but don't do that." Trein said, then scooted back away from the table and stood up. "I have to go feed Lucius now."

You waved, remembering the grouchy-looking cat who had been introduced to you a few days prior. But after Trein left, his statement stuck with you. Were there any notable students that gave off that feeling? Not that you could really remember, though the morning had gradually began to blur in your memory as time progressed. Hopefully that just meant that there weren't any troublemakers in your classes.

I finally am starting this series because it gives me something to do :) I'm pretty pumped about it, if you couldn't tell! I made another post about this AU that you can find here, which contains just general information about it and some other stuff.

I based the mentionable characters off of who already unlocked their UMs and who may want to make theirs stronger such as extending the usage time of their UM (Trey), widen the effect of their UM (Jamil), or just in general making their UM "stronger"/gain better control over it (Jack, Kalim, Azul). I may include some other characters later on. Also, feel free to ask me if you want to include your twst oc in this series as well! :D

This series is very self-indulgent lol, but I hope it was enjoyable. I made this part a bit short just to act as... I can't thing of the word. Like a teaser? Idk. Anywaysss, I'm gonna start making part 2 soon. If you couldn't tell, I'm extremely excited 💫

Taglist: @officialdaydreamer00 @mermaidfanficlibrary @lyle-my-beloved

#NEW TWST SERIES #professor!reader au #part 1 #twisted wonderland #twst #disney twst #disney twisted wonderland #twst wonderland

[votestaynight]

1st Day - "One day" (scene 3)

It's something I've started. I should finish the job I began this morning.

"I'll change my plans. We're finishing the job from this morning, right? Let's finish the repairs before the exams start." "Thank you. Let's go and look at the patient in the art club then." "All right. Oh, and clear the people out of the room, will you? I can't concentrate with people watching me." "Of course. I won't let them get in your way." Issei quickly walks to the hallway, and I follow him out of the classroom in a hurry.

The sun has already set when we leave the school building. The school gates are already closed. It's seven o'clock and way past curfew. But thanks to Issei, we're not in trouble.

"You helped me a lot today. I'll certainly make up for it, so tell me if you need anything." "Yeah, I'll let you know if something comes up. I don't think anything will, though." I didn't help him to get something in return, so there's nothing I want from Issei.

"…Geez, I guess it is a problem to be too good a person. It's helpful to have you around, but I can't stand it when other people use you to their liking. Helping others is a good thing, but you should be more picky with who you help. You just help anyone who comes to ask you." "Hm? Am I that indiscriminate?" "Yes. And that's just going to let heartless idiots use you as they wish. You're a busy man, so it should be okay for you to decline from time to time."

"――――" I can't really tell, but it seems like Issei's worried about me. I've been called helpful since I was in middle school, as I don't turn down requests for help and don't ask for anything in return.

I guess Issei thinks that's dangerous. But I'm doing it because I want to, and it's not a problem as I decline things that I think are beyond me.

"It's nothing for you to worry about, Issei. I know myself better than anyone. Besides, helping people is a good thing. It's not something a son of the owner of a temple should be trying to stop." "But I think you're going so far that it might eventually overwhelm you."

"I'll take your warning. See you tomorrow, then." "…Yes, I'll see you tomorrow."

Issei leaves, looking discontented. Issei's house, Ryudou Temple, is up in the mountains. So naturally, our routes home go in different directions.

I walk through the moonlit town. Walking up the road, I notice that there aren't any people around.

The time is around seven-thirty. There should be people around at this time, but there's no sign of anyone.

"…Oh yeah." There was some crime here in Miyama City a few days ago. A burglar murdered someone, I think. That must be why there's no one around and why the school curfew became six o'clock.

"…Gas leaks and murder, huh? It's been getting dangerous lately." No wonder there are fewer people walking around at night. It's getting too dangerous to let Sakura go home on her own. Sakura's house is in the residential area on the other side of town. Starting tonight, I should walk her hom―――

"…Huh?" For a moment, I can't believe my eyes. There is someone on the road which I thought was empty. The person is standing above me as if looking down at me.

"―――――――" Without realizing it, I hold my breath. The silver-haired girl smiles and descends the hill without a sound.

As she passes…

"You'll die if you don't summon it soon, Onii-chan."

She says something strange.

I go up the hill and reach my house. As the lights are on, Sakura and Fuji-Nee must be home already.

I smell dinner the moment I enter the living room. At the table are Sakura and Fuji-Nee, in the middle of dinner. It seems the main dish tonight is chicken in cream, and Fuji-Nee, who loves white sauce, is in a good mood.

"Welcome home, Senpai. We're sorry for starting without you." "Sorry I'm late. I wish I could have come home earlier." "No, you made it. Could you wait a bit? I'll get your dinner ready right away." "Yeah, all right. I'll go and wash my hands, so make sure Fuji-Nee doesn't eat my food." "Yes, I will."

I return to my room. It's a fairly empty room compared to the shed, but since I don't have any hobbies, I think it's quite decorated. Most of them are random things Fuji-Nee has left here, though.

I wash my hands, change, and return to the living room to find my dinner ready.

"Itadakimasu." "I hope it is to your liking…" Sakura is terribly modest.

Her cooking skills have vastly improved in the past year. She has me completely beaten at Western-style foods, and I can barely beat her at Japanese food. Neither of us have touched Chinese. I'm pleased my pupil is getting better, but it's kind of depressing when the teacher is defeated by the student.

"―――Mmm." It's as good as I expected. Chicken becomes harder the longer you cook it, so it's juicier and tastier if you roast it before cooking it even though it's tedious. That's done perfectly here. It's a master's skill, forever beyond the clumsy Fuji-Nee.

"How is it, Senpai…? Um, I think I did quite well today…" "It's perfect. The sauce is great too. I guess you have me completely beat when it comes to Western food."

"Yeah, meaty food is much better since Sakura-chan started cooking." With that. Fuji-Nee, who had been preoccupied with her food, lifts up her head.

"Oh, Shirou. A student mustn't come home this late." …Ack. It seems she's in a bad mood now that she's seen my face, even though she was happy because of dinner.

"Geez, I bet you were helping someone again. That's good, but at least come home early at times like this. I even told you it was dangerous in homeroom. I said it for your sake, you know?"[l]

"…Uh, can't you tell me that at home instead of in homeroom?" "You wouldn't listen if I told you here. It's more effective if I tell you at school." "…Sensei, I think that's abusing your authority. You shouldn't mix work and private life."

"No, it's not enough for Shirou unless I go that far. He's always on the losing side because he's the one helping everyone else. He should at least come straight home and relax sometimes, that idiot." "Hey, what do you mean by idiot? I'm not on the losing side if I help someone and they're helped by it."

"…Man. I wonder if you got that from Kiritsugu-san. I worry because you're like that." I don't exactly know how she's worried, as she's energetically munching down her dinner.

"…Um, Fujimura-Sensei. From what you said, has Senpai been like this since he was small?" "Yup, he's always been like that. He's the type that goes to help people in trouble. But he's not meddlesome, he's just a bit precocious."

Fuji-Nee laughs dangerously. "Fuji-Nee, I'll get mad if you say too much. You too, Sakura. Don't ask such boring questions."

I glare at them. Fuji-Nee clicks her tongue and backs down, but… "Fujimura-Sensei, please continue." Sakura is taking the lesson seriously.

"Then I shall. See, Shirou is a person who can't ignore someone in trouble. It's like helping the weak and defeating the strong. In the essay he wrote as a child, he said 'My dream is to become a superhero'."

"――――" …She's talking about things from so long ago. But it's all true, so I don't interrupt. Anyways, becoming a superhero is a goal I must not stray from even now.

"Wow. Senpai was a real kid." "Yeah, he was some kid. He would go and help girls being picked on by much older kids, and he'd do the chores around the house because Kiritsugu-san wouldn't.

Man, he was so cute and innocent back then, so why did he grow up so crooked?"

"Probably because of you. Kids think a lot when they see bad adults. Learn to make your own dinner before you say anything like that." "――――Wha…" Fuji-Nee crumbles. I thought she might drop her head and repent, but…

"Uhh, Onee-chan is sad. Sakura-chan, can I have another bowl?" Fuji-Nee asks for her third bowl.

Relaxing after dinner, it's almost nine o'clock.

"Well, what shall I do?" There's some time before my evening training. I should―――

#votestaynight #fate #fate/stay night #fate route

[reginarubie]

Hi, i had no idea you took prompts. I got all excited but I wasn't sure if I should send any since I don't want to overwhelmed you. With you balancing real life responsibilities and maintaining a social life, writing plus making metas. Do you have time to idk breathe?

I can not stress this enough but write at your own pace, no matter how needy we are I'm worried we'd burn you out.

Ciao anon!,

First of all...

Your message is so genuinely sweet that I swear it has taken a couple of months off my shoulders. Thank you for worrying about me, I appreciate it beyond what words can say.

While yes, I've commented on how I do feel a bit burned out lately (and I cannot stress enough how caring it is that you either guessed it or remembered I had commented on it), it's mostly related to work, and actually writing is a good way to vent and relax.

I'll own that balancing real life expectations and responsibilities, with writing metas and stories as well as maintaining a social life can be challenging, but let me reassure you I've not been taking it too far.

Usually I would update once, sometimes twice a day — I finished my first Jonsa fic (43 chapters long) in a bit over two months updating almost once a day, so I'm usually much faster than I am being right now — but since I've been balancing all of the above and also caring for my emotional and physical wellbeing I've slowed down considerably on my update schedule.

On the same matter, you might have seen I had quite the list of metas cooking in the pot, yet I've not even posted the second part of the Jonsa mythology series, because I am taking it at my own pace, slow if necessary, instead of throwing myself in a research spree to get out the content I had planned necessarily on a deadline that doesn't exist.

So don't worry you aren't burning me out, on the contrary seeing how many people enjoy my writing, ask for more, are interested in the writing process I go through and on my wellbeing in general is actually extremely, not only appreciated, but fuel for my energy. It makes me feel good to know how many people enjoy my metas, my stories and take their time to let me know, to — even through the net — take into consideration my wellbeing

Of course, there are times in which I get frustrated with a particular chapter, or plot-point that I can't seem the write right or fast enough, (I am a perfectionist and an over-achiever, my bad) I'm learning to not push through as I usually do on very important matters and just trust the process and take more time if needed; and I cannot stress enough how healing it is to hear someone, even a stranger online, tell you to take care of yourself and just go my own pace; so your message really did make me feel both seen and loved. So thank you, virtually know that I am hugging you silly.

In any case, if you want to send prompts (even if they aren't Jonsa related, I love the challenge), or are curious about anything, don't feel pressured not to because you are afraid you might overwhelm me, I promise to not overexert myself just to follow a pace that doesn't match my own in this moment. I enjoy seeing and reading of other people theories, if they match mine, what they think of my stories and I really enjoy when I see you all want more!

Worst case scenario, I will disappear from the net for a few months until I feel up to write again — just ask the readers and followers of Song of the Dragons which I started years ago, (my first ever fic that is a complete rewrite of the series with fAegon reaching the North at the beginning of AGOT and finding his hidden half-sister, femJon Snow with whom he falls in love in true Targ fashion and the way having a family might heal Daenerys' trauma and scars) they may get a series of updates in fast succession and then nothing for up to a year (they are really way too patient with me!); though seeing you all asking for more, theorizing and commenting on my works will make me feel better even when I am on hiatus.

Most probable case scenario, the prompt or ask might sit in my ask box with several others I haven't had the energy to reply to yet, since I like to do my things throughout and I'd rather wait to give a satisfactory reply than writing down an hasty one.

Best case scenario? I'll just keep being inspired and write at my own pace of the moment :D

Again, thank you so much for your concern and for taking the time to actually show it!

Hope you have a day as awesome as you are!

#ask the hag #anon asks

[arewepigeons]

A little excerpt from my first attempt at a blog. Testing the water to see if my writing and thoughts can be engaging. Please let me know your thoughts!

"I just need to know I'm not alone. I rationalise everything. Why my girlfriend is annoyed at me for watching another 'Infographics Show' YouTube video. Why a patient at one of the GP Surgeries I work at is emotionally blackmailing me. Why we have allowed a Johnson government to flourish. The list is endless. I think I am too aware; too aware of all the hardships bestowed upon people, all the wrongs committed among global societies. Why some suffer a long and agonising death and why those most abhorrent have such pleasant existences. If I just accepted all these factoids, I would lose the plot. You can flip these, of course you can. The good done among global societies, those who deserve it having a long and fulfilling life and pleasant existences. It is easy for me to accept the good because that is how I see the world. I just cannot fathom all the bad when it is so easy being good.

I think change has driven my need to explain. At this stage in my existence, I am finishing three long terrible years of being a GP Receptionist. I never meant to stay so long but the Pandemic has that affect on people. I have tried my best. I really have. I'm considered one of the good ones because I was willing to break the rules to sort those in need out. Please don't mistake this for a positive thing. There are rules in place to control the never ending influx of patient requests. I would say I would go above and beyond for a patient. The next day they would get a stern and unassuming 'no' from one of my colleagues. All this would cause is confusion for the patient and my colleague looking unhelpful. I have been very aware of this the past three years. I cannot help myself though. How can you not feel empathy for someone addicted to opiates? Ask any 10 year old where they see themselves in 20 years. I guarantee not one will say, "living in a council flat, on kid number 5, addicted to Oramorph." No one picks that life. No one willingly chooses to emotionally blackmail a 19 year old girl way out of her depth. Yet people still do and they should be punished for it. How do you rationalise for arseholes in a society that otherwise demands restraint? What happened to all the clapping at the start of the Pandemic? The NHS only got busier..."

#blog post #uk nhs #pandemic #spilled thoughts #feedback needed

[neutron-stars-collision]

Closer

Neil x F!Reader

Summary: Plot what plot.

Warnings: 18+ (and I really mean it this time), they're both trying to dominate and I've no clue what's going on.

Author's Notes: Suppose this is what happens when an image won't leave you alone and you crave a self-indulgent one-shot... I don't even know, but this took remains of my sanity. Challenged myself with more graphic and this is what we ended up with.

Thank you Shet for reassurance through writing this and not having enough of my whining.

Feedback is greatly appreciated and I hope you'll enjoy!

It is always the same. That brilliant idea to go for lunch and do a round of sightseeing in the afternoon because surely it wouldn’t be too bad. Right?

Well, whoever thought of that was owed an excruciating death in the fires of Hell. Or Orcus, as would be more appropriate for the current location. Who knew the Italian coast transforms into the Death Valley over summer? Sighing with exasperation, you waited not so patiently as Neil slipped the key card into the door and opened the room with a typical flourish. Feeling the constant trickle of sweat down your back, you pushed him inside unceremoniously and let the door close with a thud. As the cold air enveloped your body with the sweetest of embraces, you could not hold back a pleased groan.

“Fuck” the curse not enough to express the internal pain “Jesus fucking Christ, I hate this heat,” accentuating the meaning you aggressively lowered the aircon temperature to 18C “Did I mention that temps above 25 Celsius should be made illegal?” remembering about Neil’s presence, you glared at him.

It was his shit idea in the first place. And you were never letting that one go. He was staring at you with amusement glimmering in the blue eyes. Another reason to punch him in the teeth. Or something.

“More or less twenty times within the last hour, why?” answering your question, he opened the minibar and took out a bottle of water.

Nonchalantly perching on the desk, he took a longer sip, still watching you with curiosity. No remorse whatsoever over the tortures he put you through. Annoying.

But not more so than the sweat still running down your skin, making the fabric stick to your body in places you never deemed possible. When leaving the hotel three hours ago, the linen shirt sounded like a good idea. Now, with half of it drenched, you were sure nudity was the only viable option to go outside. Groaning with frustration, you tugged at the garment, grimacing at the feel of the damp fabric.

“God, everything just feels… wet” uttering the word with loathing, you added, “Like soaking wet,”

That got Neil’s attention. He glanced up with the lips slightly parted, one eyebrow raised.

“Everything?” a quick scan of your body, swallowing hard as though the suggestion triggered thirst that no water could quench.

Uh-huh. The irritation too high to give in just yet. Instead, you allowed yourself to sweep your gaze over his form leisurely. The only sign that he too was bothered by the heat was the glistening forehead and flushed cheeks. The usually fluffy mane tamed, strands sticking to the temples. Still devilishly handsome. With the long legs crossed and the blue polo shirt perfectly bringing out the colour of his eyes, he looked godly. Unfair. Prompted by that thought, you closed the distance and snatched the chilled water bottle out of his hand:

“It’s not like you’d get it, though. Even soaked in sweat you look like a bloody… male Aphrodite” throwing in the slight, you quickly downed the rest of the water.

Another look at your boyfriend was enough to assure you the metaphor worked. Neil was gaping at you, utterly puzzled, and then slowly looked down as if to check himself out. You snickered when he lifted the edge of the shirt and touched his abdomen with a dream-like expression. Fondly: idiot.

“Is that an insult or a compliment? Because I admit I lost you there” shaking off the stupor, he met your watchful gaze with a frown.

It was difficult to stay mad for much longer. And so…

“Whichever one you want,” shrugging, you unzipped the skirt, letting it fall to the ground, “I need a shower. ASAP”

Without waiting for Neil to respond, you started taking off the shirt. With a disgusted sound, you threw it next to the skirt and positioned yourself underneath the AC. Still too many clothes. The noise of plastic bottle hitting the bin and then:

“Whoa…” the playful tone making you look up straight into the mischievous sparks in Neil’s eyes, “That’s giving me all sorts of ideas” he eyed you slowly, gaze taking in your body clad only in underwear.

Not that it was anything new. And usually, you would play along with pleasure, curious about where it might lead you this time. Now, however, that fire of annoyance burning bright still needed tending. And shower sounded much better than whatever Neil might offer.

With a huff, you reached to unclasp the bra and let it join the carnage in the hallway. One look at his hungry expression was enough to prompt an idea. You gave him a quick peck on the cheek and, without leaving time to react, pressed the bathroom handle:

“I won’t lock the door” an off-hand remark rather than an invitation.

But you knew it would work. It always did.

Once inside, thanks to the striptease you indulged in, all that was left was to take off the panties and step into the shower. You turned on the rain head and sighed with happiness when the chilly water cooled off your body. That is what bliss felt like. You closed your eyes, contented enough to stand under the running water. Grounding yourself in the feeling of your palm pressed firmly to the tiled wall. A smug smirk spreading on your lips when, finally, you heard the bathroom door open and close. So predictable.

You kept your back turned to the entrance to the shower, eyes closed if only to keep up the act of mild irritation. Not so mild, in fact, but enough not to give Neil satisfaction by throwing yourself in his arms. He would have to work a little to get something out of it.

At first, a tentative touch running up your spine in the familiar expression of his presence. Enough to trigger the light flicker of passion. With the cold water, it was easy to pretend the goosebumps were not his accomplishment. Encouraged by your stillness, Neil took a step, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you close. A traitorous gasp swallowed with effort. You heard him chuckle lowly while slowly caressing your body. A puff of warmer air against the side of your neck:

“Ever since I saw you in that sundress, I wanted to do this,” Neil whispered the confession with confidence.

Lips grazing over the shell of your ear, alighting the nerve endings with precision. You knew which dress he meant. The clothing choice from a day earlier, haunting with an accompanying pride. Good to know.

“What exactly?” feigning nonchalance, you kept your hands pressed against the wall and the glass window.

For now, it was easy to ignore the need slowly pooling in your lower stomach. You wanted to keep on playing the game a little longer. To see how far he was willing to go.

Neil tightened the grip, winding both of his arms around your waist. No space left between you.

“Pull you flush against me,” the explanation complemented with a brave sweep of hand over your stomach “Feel your skin and curves under my fingertips” instinctively, you pressed your thighs together, the desire building up steady “Feel the way you shiver whenever I touch you like this” his fingers teasingly running up and down your navel.

The assumption was enough to give back that spark of annoyance. A fight to keep up the role a little longer. Struggling with the overwhelming breathlessness, you whispered back the question:

“Aren’t you giving yourself too much credit?” you reached behind you to run a ghostly touch over his hipbone.

Feeling the skin and the relishing in the shallow gasp. In retaliation, Neil let his hands venture higher, cupping your breasts and circling the nipples. Fuck. At that move, there was no way of stopping the shudder running through your body.

“Am I?” you heard the amusement in his voice, palms executing death perfectly.

Nothing left to do but sigh and press up against him in search of fulfilment. But the teasing was far from finished. You felt his lips experimentally glide over the nape of your neck, collecting the water droplets and leaving a trail of fire in their wake. Searching for support, you firmly placed your hand on his hip, gasping at the feel of him pressing into your backside. The hardness never failing to cause a rush of excitement flowing through your body. As though sensing your growing arousal, Neil continued the teasing in a low, soft tone:

“I wanted to kiss down your neck, graze my teeth over your perfect skin” making his words come true, he trailed kisses down the nape of your neck.

A sigh each time he lightly bit your shoulder, a groan with every single butterfly touch along your shoulder blades. Carefully tiptoeing the line between animalistic passion and tender caress that seemed to define your relationship. Only this time, with anger still fresh on your mind, you began getting impatient, suddenly eager for him to speed it up. To give you something more substantial.

Using the strike of courage, you reached your hand further back, curious fingers dancing over him in the mildest of provocations. To give him a sign that patience was running thin. It worked for Neil let out a strangled groan and stopped the careful study of your neck with a painful hickey over the pulse point. That was bound to leave a deep red mark. He did not give you time to react, pulling you somehow even closer and delving the hand between your legs with ease:

“To slip my fingers between your thighs and feel how wet you are because of me,” the sentence murmured with an unmistakable tint of want hazing his mind.

He wasted no time, instantly parting your folds, collecting the arousal, and spreading it to ease whatever was bound to come next. The feeling was familiar yet still clouding your brain with need. Because now even the cold water was not helping the rising temperature. Nothing left to lose. Time to give in and take what he would offer. As he repeated the torturous move, barely touching your clit or putting pressure on the throbbing parts, you decided to take matters into your hands.

“And?” using the question as a distraction to encircle his wrist.

And raise the offensive hand to your lips. Licking his fingers clean before the water could. A sharp gasp told you it worked. Using the momentum, you turned around in his embrace and met the shocked, darkened gaze with a smirk of your own. Neil glanced at your lips as though tempted to collect the remains of your taste from them and locked his eyes with yours:

“Get down on my knees and have a taste of my favourite drug,” a murderous glint within the blue depths.

Knowing well enough how much you enjoyed that. How often you would ask for it.

Your thighs clenched on their own accord, anticipation heightening the senses. To find a brief relief, you rose on your toes and crashed your mouth into his, knowing Neil would meet you halfway. The tumultuous kiss filled with chaos, hunger, and need, betraying the love underscoring every other adjective befitting your connection. The tongues easily slipping in, curling around each other, seeking the ultimate pleasure.

“What’s stopping you?” after a long snog, you broke the contact and panted out, resting your forehead against his.

Allowing yourself a second of gentleness. Admiring the affectionate look in Neil’s eyes, you slowly caressed his body. Returning the previous torments with your dose of playfulness. Letting him remember that you were not the only one that was so ready. That the attraction was mutual, and you knew that very well. Explorative touches down his length, enjoying the way he swallowed hard and closed his eyes, trying to find the lost thread. After a beat, he met your gaze once again. The darkness startling.

“Nothing” using a second of hesitation, Neil took your courageous hand in his and searched your face, “Only… say please” the satisfied smirk added the wicked gleam to his face.

You considered scoffing and pushing him out to keep the pride intact. But… with the core practically dripping with the need for a release, that had to be forgotten. Clenching your jaw to stop the shame from springing up, you uttered the word with apprehension:

“… Please,” making sure to show him the extent of annoyance.

A retaliation already forming in your mind. Revenge would be sweet.

“Good girl” thought processes cut short with the two words.

Oh fuck. Simple, yet more effective than anything else. A jolt of want passing through your body as Neil tipped your chin, arrogantly pleased with himself. He could read you like a book, knowing well what praise would do. This time there was no holding back. No shame or reluctance.

“You fucking-” spitting out the words with annoyance, your rant got stopped with a finger pressed firmly against your lips.

“Shush,” the stern tone, shutting you up with yet another wave of arousal.

The steel look in Neil’s eyes only increasing the sensation. It was bound to get interesting. As if drawn by your dark stare, he closed the gap and captured your lips in a heated kiss. The water, running down, slipping in the gap between you, failing to satisfy the craving. Prodded by the sudden flash of need, you let your teeth catch Neil’s lower lip and tugged at it forcefully. A clear signal to stop stalling. Ending the contact with a chaste kiss on the corner of your mouth, he met your wild gaze with a calculating assessment. You knew the game well, frozen by the multitude of feelings. Not that it would’ve made him speed up. He enjoyed the control too much to give in.

A final searching look, your hand helplessly clinging to the gaps between the tiles.

“The louder, the better, you know that” brushing his nose over your ear, he whispered the command huskily.

Another reason to hold on tight. A flare-up of anger within your chest, mixing with the increasing frustration.

“I hate you,” you got as far as seething out the sentence before the voice died in your throat.

Neil grinned and lightly pushed you at the wall to give himself the needed space. Without wasting a moment, he started leaving kisses down your body. Gentle pecks on the shoulders, softening the previous damage. Tongue swirling around your nipples, causing a whimper to escape through your parted lips. Your free hand instinctively latched onto his head, finding an anchor in the wet blonde strands. Slowly, Neil inched his way down, kneeling at your feet, hands running up your thighs, creating sparks in their wake.

“Let’s see how long that holds true” he looked up, nothing but a smug smile and dark, hungry eyes.

Fucked. Terrifyingly so.

There was no time to react as he left a trail of kisses up your thighs, getting closer yet taking his time. And then, something you would never get tired of. The first, experimental kitten lick along your slit, parting the folds and spreading the arousal. As if that was needed. Lapping up everything you were offering and making you tighten the grip over his hair. Shocks passing through your body upon every single touch of his tongue. As you yanked on his mane with force, letting out a string of curses, Neil raised his head. Your eyes were drawn to the glistening lips which he licked clean with an unhidden expression of delight.

“God, how I love this taste,” the compliment aimed with lethal precision, satisfaction lighting up his eyes.

Only to pick up the action the very next second. Temperature constantly rising, no mercy given. It only got worse when Neil added his skilful hand to the mix. Stroking the clit, eliciting moans and gasps. Your eyes screw shut, focusing on the way it felt when his finger entered you and started curling inside in search of that sweet spot.

“Jesus fuck” the profanity escaping when he added the second digit, all the while letting his tongue circle the sensitive bud.

Chuckle vibrating through your core, the unoccupied hand contradicting the moment with tender strokes along your hip. As if to soothe and support.

The haze, getting heavier, overcasting everything with the tint of need. For a release. For that high, the explosion of pleasure you were slowly edging. The scales tipped with two fingers curling inside you, hitting the most sacred of places, and Neil’s lips sucking on the clit without moderation. Taking everything with eagerness and delectation.

With the heat almost unbearable and the edges of your vision darkening, you could only pull at his hair with force and rasp out:

“Neil, I can’t-” the intent lost in the outburst of pleasure.

Every nerve, existing to receive what Neil was offering. Every cell, burning with ecstasy. You could feel the incoming wave, ready to succumb to it without a fight. Until he raised his head once more, feeling your muscles clench around his fingers, everything synced up perfectly.

“Come… on. For me,” the emphasis not escaping your overflooded mind, gaze meeting his helplessly, “Don’t be shy” a whisper, darkness tinting the vowels.

The feeling of defeat, adding a dose of shame into the whirlwind, fuelling the ideas of vengeance.

But there was no time to concentrate when Neil finished the act with the third finger easing in. Tipping you off the edge with a piercing cry and a desperate tug on his hair. The strength of the pull making him groan loudly, tongue collecting the arousal with frantic moves. Pleasure flooding your vision. Nothing but the water, Neil, and his body, solid beneath your shaking hands.

Your knees buckled, the force of the aftershocks ripping through your system. Feeling the high course through the veins, you shut your eyes and let out quiet whimpers, unable to process the reality. Sex with Neil was always memorable, but it has never been this intense. Especially only for an entrée.

Feeling your body relax, Neil retracted the hand and placed a final kiss on your clit with saintly reverence. You opened your eyes in time to see him look up, the dark blue irises rimmed with long dark eyelashes. Adoration. Want. Weak from the strength of that release, your legs wobbled as you tried to change position. Foot slipped on the slick tiles, and you already anticipated the fall when an arm wound around your waist, pulling you upright. Startled, you barely comprehended when he got up and saved you, making use of the smooth moves and long limbs.

“Got you,” a whisper against your temple as Neil hugged you close, cradling your body with care, “Always” his gaze met yours, tenderness overshadowing every other feeling.

On reflex, you mirrored his soft smile in an expression of gratitude. For much more than saving your ass from the bruises. Despite the maelstrom of emotions, you gave in to the gentle moment and returned the embrace, pressing your cheek against his chest. Listening to the fast, familiar heartbeat, you whispered:

“You nearly killed me just now,” the breathless tint only giving evidence to the statement.

It’s not like he wouldn’t know. With screams like those, he had to. Neil chuckled, one of his hands venturing up to cradle your head, the other tracing shapes onto your back. Water flowing down with the steady stream, enveloping your embraced bodies in comfortable warmth.

“That wasn’t the intention,” he murmured, nuzzling the top of your head.

You could hear the pleased tone there, indicating what you suspected. Following the playful thread, you leaned back enough to meet his gaze and asked:

“What was it then?” a hand running through his hair, watching the strands darken when wet.

At the roots, his natural light brown colour was beginning to show, adding a surprising edge to his startling physique. For you, that meant another evening soon spent sat on the edge of the toilet seat, laughing at his attempts at dying the hair on his own. Those were fun moments.

Catching your absent gaze, Neil tipped your chin to bring you back to the present and then grinned:

“To show you how much I adore you,” the simple answer laid with a soft kiss on your lips, signing off the sentiment.

You opened your mouth to let his tongue in instantly, breathing in the air he was willing to share and relishing in the familiarity of the moves. Lips slowly gliding over each other, tongues caressing and teasing. This one was filled with tenderness, an expression of love and devotion rather than hunger. A breather.

Not for long. Using the kiss as a distraction, you switched the positions, making sure Neil would have his back pressed against the wall. For convenience’s sake. Breaking the contact, you whispered the single-worded response:

“Mutually,” unable to wipe the devilish smirk from your face, you waited for a beat to let him catch up.

Those widening eyes were a perfect cue to grin with satisfaction at the perfectly executed setup for the payback. Neil stared back at you with confusion deepening on his face, slowly taking in the reality. Finally, a single word, a prelude to the mountain of questions:

“What-” his brow furrowed, giving you the needed moment to step in.

“Vengeance,” you winked, and wasting no time, lowered onto your knees, “Let me just… now that’s a wonderful view” shifting into the most comfortable position, you gave him a long admiring look from the new vantage point.

It really was. Never failing to make you that tiny bit more eager and hungrier since the first time. Especially when knowing what he is capable of.

The flood of specific memories flushing up your cheeks and giving needed courage to begin. You glanced up, searching for consent, and met Neil’s hazed stare. He seemed transfixed as if already well under your spell, one of his hands mirroring your desperate move from minutes prior, clinging to the tiles in search of support. You raised an eyebrow in the silent question. Yes?

Please. The fervent nod accompanied by the way he swallowed hard was all you waited for.

Never breaking eye contact, you licked your lips thoroughly, all the while using your hands to stroke him lightly. Enough to elicit a gasp. Emboldened by the reaction, you opened your mouth, letting out a warm puff of air to tease him. Neil groaned, the free hand reaching out to cup your cheek with tenderness you did not anticipate. As if distracting himself, he brushed away the damp strands of hair sticking to your face and brushed the pad of his thumb along your lower lip. Gratitude. A signal to start.

A few kitten licks along the length, letting him get used to the sensation. Sharp exhales, muscles tensing. Upping the game, you started focusing on specific areas, using the sound cues and the way his hand tightened the hold over the nape of your neck. Now and then, you would look up to see the darkened pupils and lips parted in the purest expression of pleasure. The furrowed brow and the clouded gaze, telling you when the right time was to bring his tip into your mouth. Gently swirling your tongue around the head, savouring the taste with quiet hums. Stroking the shaft with one hand, you used the other to rake your fingernails over his abdomen. Returning the markings he inflicted earlier.

The string of curses leaving his lips amongst the moans and groans was a good indication that it worked. Noticing the hint of impatience in how he quivered, hips thrusting on an impulse, you slowly inched your mouth down his length, enveloping him as far as you could without it becoming uncomfortable. The answering loud moan told you it was exactly what he needed. Meeting his dark stare, you nodded, permitting him to start moving his hips. The adoration meeting desire in his eyes as Neil sped up. Adjusting to the pace he needed, you started sucking on him. Cheeks hollowed, tiniest of moans drawn out to let him know you enjoyed the act, tongue collecting everything he was giving, anticipating the end with a familiar heat pooling between your thighs once again. Because seeing him like this, was more exciting than you deemed possible.

Then his thrusts got sloppier, knuckles of the hand clinging to the gaps in the tiles whitening; groans replacing any other sound. Soon. Suddenly he seemed to sober up a notch, blinking twice as though forcing the brain to work and then rasping out:

“God, I’m going to-” the meaning interrupted by a whimper when you took the opportunity to increase the pressure by a notch.

You could see the ridiculous dilemma flash in the blue eyes as if he worried about something like that. As if he has not just devoured you like the god’s nectar. Certainly, an idiot. Continuing the bold strokes with your hand, you made sure to meet his gaze before echoing the encouragement:

“For me,” a hint of recognition reflected at you, adding the mischievous tint to your smile, “Please,” grinning widely, you quickly put your mouth back to the task.

Intensifying every move to make sure he would be satisfied. It did not take long. Neil moaned out your name breathlessly before he tensed and came with a shudder ripping through his body. The hand cupping your cheek fell onto your shoulder, fingers digging into the flesh with the force of the release. Swallowing every drop of what he gave you with delight, you made sure to show him the extent of satisfaction in your gaze.

Once Neil was done, he leaned heavily on the tiled wall, quick breaths escaping through the parted mouth. Eyes still clouded yet watching you constantly with evident fascination. Licking your lips clean, you accepted the hand he reached out to pull you up. Resting your palm over his racing heart, you leaned in close to whisper:

“Every inch a gentleman, I see” an appreciative glance down, as if he could miss the innuendo.

His eyes flashed, the familiar darkness creeping at the edge of the blissful fatigue. To your advantage, there was still a moment left of this more subdued Neil. Afterwards? Who knows. The spark of excitement lit up in your chest as you closed the gap and took him by surprise with a heated kiss. Pushing him further up against the wall and taking the lead with your tongue instantly prodding him to open. The grip on your laced hands, tightening as Neil started reciprocating the kiss with an equal eagerness. As if you both have been starving for each other. There was never quite enough oxygen to fulfil needs, and so, after few long minutes interrupted with stolen breaths and fleeting pecks, you broke apart, staring at one another with awe. Neil’s eyes wandered over your face with almost dream-like enchantment written all over.

“Wow,” he breathed out the word with a small smile creeping on the edge of his lips.

It was difficult not to grin back, overwhelmed with love for the man. With your heart close to melting from the tenderness and softness, you chose to strike:

“Is that all the praise I’m going to receive?” quirked eyebrow and feigned dismay.

If only to push him where you needed him to be. Because as much as this gentle and affectionate side of your relationship was everything you could have asked for, currently, you needed more. More than this. Using the palm pressed firmly against his chest, you trailed your fingers south, watching with satisfaction at the tiniest of twitches, betraying the hidden desire, confirming the assumptions. As if slowly waking up from the daze, Neil caught your curious fingers in his and raised your hand to lay a kiss on your knuckles. The playful glimmer already there.

“I’m afraid you stole my breath away. Again” a shrug with an apologetic tint to the tone.

As a contradiction to the meekness acted out, he let go of your hand and wound his arm around your waist, pulling you closer. Pressing your bodies against each other, every curve and edge fitting like two pieces of a puzzle. Like two halves of a whole. You glanced up at him, trying to judge the current mood, finding nothing but beauty. The wet hair, sticking to the forehead, water dripping down the slope of his nose and onto the bruised lower lip. Up this close, he looked as if he belonged in Michelangelo’s workshop, fine features chiselled with precision. Ocean blue eyes framed with long and dark eyelashes drawing you in, the longer you kept on staring. Mouth curled up in a soft smile as if even the sight of your lovesick gaze was something he wanted to commit to memory.

With a sight like that, there was only one thing you could do. Feeling the need pulse in your veins, you reached out to turn off the water. It was time to act. Neil looked at you questioningly as if willing to follow the tempo you were about to set. Biting down on your lip, you met his gaze with poise.

“Good. Because that was rather… enjoyable” lowering down your voice, you noticed how his eyes widened; using the tricks learned from Neil himself, your hand ventured down once again “I love how you taste. The way you shiver as I make you come apart” as your fingers danced along his length, he gasped, a shudder running through his body “Sculpted by the gods yet falling into pieces at my command” whispering out the punchline, you gently stroked him to elicit a groan.

A satisfying response. Feeling courage surge through your chest, you smirked, observing as he seemed to absorb your words slowly. He swallowed hard, Adam’s apple bobbing with effort. The pupils widened, darkening the irises and bringing out the predatory flicker. Mission accomplished. Once again, his hand darted out, stopping your teasing with fingers encircling the wrist tightly.

“You’re asking for trouble,” the husky voice sending shivers down your spine.

You met his gaze, noticing the evident change. It was bound to get interesting. Once you tasted the power, it was hard to give it back. Stepping out of the embrace, you noticed:

“Am I? I thought we’re done here” without waiting for him, you made a move to exit the shower.

Knowing he would follow. You made it as far as grabbing the towel hanging on the hook and wrapping it over your body before his strong arms encircled around you from behind. Pulling you against his chest, just as it all began. Then, a whisper with lips brushing over your ear:

“We’re far from done” oh.

Good. You barely had time to react when Neil lifted you, bridal style, and opened the bathroom door with a kick. Bewildered, you looked at him with curiosity, relishing in the way he cradled you. Possessiveness and care making your head spin with the implications. However, you barely had the time to think of the right question when he stopped abruptly by the long desk lining one side of the room and set you down on the counter. Oh. Consciously adjusting the towel covering your body, you risked a glance at Neil. The blue eyes clouded with need; pupils dilated. The taxing gaze, sweeping over your figure like a predator measuring up the prey. Stunned into silence by the sudden tension, you mirrored his look and allowed yourself a self-indulgent stare, appreciating what the universe gave you in the form of your boyfriend. And his godly body, as you have more than once noticed. Finally, Neil took a step closer. You watched in fascination as his fingers danced along your collarbones and over the skin on your shoulders, taking additional time to brush the fingertips over the forming bruises on your neck. The distant look, telling you it was an open admiration of his work. A shiver ran up your spine, the anticipation of whatever might happen almost stifling.

“All that talk made me a little hungry” the remark made you look up, straight into the marvellous blue eyes.

Confirming the words, Neil slowly licked his lips, hand toying with the end of your towel tucked in to keep it fixed. With heart racing in your chest, you made sure to throw a suggestive glance at his body before asking:

“Only a little?” the dose of provocative tone to make sure he would be within your control.

Because the level of arousal on his side was startling. Impressive, too.Your mouth watered at the sight, thighs clenching tighter together to somehow ease the ache pulsing between your legs. At once, you wanted him to ditch the games and take you this moment, and to wait, to extend the fascinating duel of passion.

Neil gave you no time to consider which one was more tempting, for he used your moment of reverie to tug at the towel to unravel it in one move.

“A lot” the answer perfecting the move with precision.

Fuck. Next thing you knew, you were sat on the towel, naked once more with no way of hiding from him and his look of starvation. Neil closed the remaining gap, blocking your escape and caging you between his arms, palms resting on either side. One last long look as if judging the best course of action before he parted your knees by inserting a leg between your thighs. A hand delving in the newly opened space, drawing out a sigh from your lips as you stared in complete fascination, frozen with the thrill of curiosity and need running through your veins. The pulsating core dripping with desire for him, shame missing from the equation when Neil finally gave in to the pull and slipped a finger between your folds. You knew how bad it was from the single look at his face. The determination slipping for a split second to give way to surprise, a short gasp soon replaced with the smirk worthy of the Lucifer himself. The daring finger parting your inner lips in a teasing move before he raised the hand to his lips, never taking the gaze of you:

“You’re still soaking wet for me,” a remark thrown with something close to mockery.

A flash of anger burning in your chest; mouth opening to prepare a retort. Only to freeze once more when Neil grinned, the hand glistening with the signs of your disgrace licked clean, mirroring your brave actions from not that long ago. Double fuck. A groan, interrupting the train of thought, that spark of irritation helping you to gain back the momentum. A look down his body offering the needed cue:

“Says you” raising one eyebrow, you reached out to repeat the lazy strokes from before.

The deepening darkness in his eyes luring you in, tempting you to push him further than ever before. If only to find out what he is like without any restraints. Without care or apprehension. Only the animalistic lust and craving left. Noticing the familiar hungry glow, you increased the intensity of your moves, smile widening when he let out a frustrated growl and slapped your hands away. In a flash, Neil wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling your bodies flush against each other.

“Careful, or I might-” his voice lowered to a whisper, the husky tone reverberating through your chest.

It was the unspoken threat and the way it felt when he pressed against your navel that made you take up the initiative. Leaning back enough to catch his eye, you interrupted the sentence:

“What?” a challenging smirk to irk him further; your legs wrapped around his waist “Destroy me. Fuck me senseless” completing the request by rubbing over him openly, showing the extent of need “Wrap that hand around my neck and take what’s yours” the addition breathed out with the scarlet tint on your cheeks.

Neil let out a whine as you pressed up against him, lacing your hands on the nape of his neck to get better leverage. He hesitated for a split second, hips already responding to your teasing with fleeting twitches. Somehow you knew what was missing. Leaning back, you tilted his chin to lock the gazes. Depths of lust enveloping your mirroring looks.

“Please,” the word dropped in between your lips, separated by a breath of space.

The trigger.

You could barely perceive his actions. The bottom lip caught between his teeth, a forceful thrust eliciting a sharp cry from your throat. Gentleness was left behind as he filled you up in one single move, stretching out your walls and making you gasp. Searching for something to hold on to, you grasped the edges of the desk, helpless gaze locked on his dark eyes without a break. Neil slightly shifted, one hand travelling up your chest to wrap loosely around your neck. Exactly as you asked. The other palm, pulling you closer around the waist, finding the needed grip. A shudder coursing through your body, the core clenching around him in the most basic of reflexes. An irked sigh escaping through your lips was all he needed to begin.

No kissing or hesitation, just the rough rhythm, delving deep into your centre with each thrust, hitting the perfect spot without tenderness. Each move complemented by your moan, pleasure flooding in, making you forget about everything that was not Neil. His gaze was fixed on you, watching with visible fascination how his tip disappeared between your folds with every thrust. The chokehold, tightening a little, increasing the frenzy, and hazing your mind with need. Only once you got used to the set tempo could you shift the position, placing your hands on his biceps. Digging in the nails to show how well that was working. Increasing the intensity of his moves, Neil groaned, his hand tightened over your neck. A clear signal to let you know who is in control. Obedience. Only, you were not that keen on compliance.

With sweat trailing down your body and your arousal wetting the conveniently placed towel, you decided to reach out for more. An assessing look, taking in Neil’s widened pupils and the startling resolve painted on his face. The clenched jaw, highlighting the sharp angles. Split lip from how he bit into it, drawing out blood. Unable to take your gaze off from his mouth, you used the second of hesitation to get closer and crash your lips into his in a hard kiss. Neil gasped, surprised by the shift, opening his mouth underneath your prodding tongue in an instant. Syncing up the way your lips glided over each other with his thrusts, you used the opportunity to gain back the lead. Meeting him halfway, relishing in the groans he let out against your mouth. And then, grabbing a fistful of his blonde locks, still damp from the shower, and leaning in to whisper into his ear:

“Harder,” the word dropped with certainty.

A further act of temptation. To see what Neil would be capable of if you drove him to the edge.

You did not have to wait long to find out. Tightening the chokehold, he sped up the movements, delving into you with a force that was ripping cries from your lips. The lascivious sounds filled the room, moans, and gasps interrupting the tempo. Soon it was nothing but the eruption of pleasure every time he hit the spot, making you rake your fingernails over his shoulder blades, deepening the marks and bruises. Using the grip you had over his shoulders, you changed the angle, bringing your pelvises together with every thrust. That seemed to be what Neil needed. He groaned, hand shifting from its position on your neck to grasp your chin and force you to lock the gazes. The feral look in his eyes, making you clench your muscles around him, giving in to the waves of feelings coursing through your body. It was that perfect balance between tempting darkness and astonishing want that you found reflected that was the final push you both needed.

Neil’s tempo waned, shuddered breaths coming out through the parted lips, watching you closely as if the ecstasy written all over your face was a drug he could not get enough of. A string of curses replacing the silence with their harsh simplicity. The grip over your waist tightening, fingers digging into your skin, bruises confirming the facts. His. Just as he tensed, moaning your name with the desperate tint to the tone, you captured his lips in a kiss. Hoping to take the edge off, to give him what he needs. Neil responded by biting hard into your lower lip, pleasure exploding before your closed eyes as he came, a shudder running through his body. Cradling you closer, breaking through the roughness and betraying the underlying feelings. Love, want, need.

It was the sensation of having him come inside you and the harsh kiss that did it. You whimpered, his name and love confessions on the tip of your tongue, spilling out in the silence. Hiding face in his neck, you stiffened, the force of the orgasm ripping through the fracture of reality. Nothing but the overwhelming euphoria, darkness underneath your eyelids dotted with stars. Neil’s skin underneath the shaking hands. His warmth enveloping you in the gilded cage of safety. Completeness. As you came to, riding out the high with your face pressed against the crook of his neck, you heard his soothing voice whispering sweet nothings, nuzzling your head. The tender ‘I got you’ and ‘I love you’ filling the quiet moment with reminders about your perfect reality. With a sigh, you slowly unravelled from the embrace; arms still wound around his body to prolong the touch. As your gazes met, the previous darkness was nowhere to be found, replaced with a soft smile and affection pouring out of his blue eyes. Cupping your cheek, Neil whispered the question:

“Alright?” he searched your face as though worried something could be amiss.

Fighting with the breathlessness, you chose to give him a grin first before responding:

“Yeah,” trailing your fingers down his chest, relishing in the peaceful moment, “Christ… You should fuck me like this more often,” the straightforwardness getting out without a hitch.

After what just happened, it was no big surprise. Neil did not seem shocked either his eyes glimmered playfully, as he traced the outline of your lips with the tip of his finger:

“Your wish is my command, darling,” the low murmur complimented with hand tilting your chin upwards to capture your lips in a kiss.

A slow and gentle one, softening the bruises and cuts, eliciting a contented sigh from your throat. Afterwards, you rested your forehead against his for a split second, soaking in the feelings. After a beat, you finally leaned back, acknowledging the mess on the hotel room floor covered with your clothes. The bathroom door was left ajar with the ventilation running. The towel you sat on, ruined. Wet hair trailing droplets down your naked body, mixing with the layer of sweat. A frown invited itself onto your face.

“I need another shower though… and a nap” yawning, you pushed Neil back to jump off the desk.

Only once you could properly stand, the fatigue caught up, making you sway on your feet. Without a word, Neil reached out a hand to steady you, pulling you into his side for an additional hug. Nothing to complain about even if you wanted.

“I should get you hot and bothered more often” it was the casual remark that made you look up.

Straight into the suspiciously satisfied face of your boyfriend. Surely not… right?

“… was that the plan all along?” schooling your features, you chose to ask the simplest of questions.

Neil shrugged, the trademark smirk gracing his features.

Bastard. Stepping away from him, you snatched the towel and hastily wrapped it around your body. If only as a retaliation. Because dragging you out to wander in the bloody scorching sun was a low blow. …even if it just gave you one of the best sex experiences in your life. Maybe. Perhaps.

“I hate you,” you hissed before storming over the pile of clothes to the bathroom.

“Uh-huh,” you refused to give him the pleasure of turning around at the sound.

Bastard. Squared.

#tenet #neil tenet #neil x reader #neil tenet x reader #neil tenet fanfic #neil tenet imagine #tenet fanfic #robert pattinson

[getitinbusan]

The September Session

18+ Jungkook Birthday Smut

The Studio Sessions Finale

A weekend birthday getaway in Jeju with Jungkook. A smut and angst filled finale to the Studio Sessions.

Words: 9075

Warnings: 18+ smut. M/F sex, M/F-F/F oral, unprotected sex, rough sex, swearing, cheating (?) poly relationship

"I don't think you can fit anything else in there. You know you're only going for 2 days right?" Yoongi picked up a pair of your lacy underwear and went for the free throw into your bag. "If I know anything about you and Jungkook, it's that you won't even need clothes."

"Only 2 days? Are you really that unbothered by me leaving?"

"I know how to pick my battles." He undid his zipper and gave you a crooked little smile. "You'll make it up to me."

"Will I now?" It was supposed to sound teasing but your knees were already on the hardwood. Pulling his soft cock out of his jeans, you wrapped your hand around him.

"You're gonna be a good girl and drain my cock before you leave, yeah?"

You tongued his tip as he grew harder twitching in your palm.

"Every last drop." You suctioned him soft and slow not wanting to leave him unfulfilled.

"Fuck, yeah…" his eyes were closed as he pumped himself into your waiting mouth.

Wanting to take it to the bed, you pulled back, but he stopped you by catching your hair. Wrapping his hand securely around it, he held you still and picked up the pace. Granting him full access to your throat, you dropped your drool-covered hands while he used your face to get himself off.

His deep moans and breathy exhales were his tell. His balls bounced off your chin and with the last few aggressive thrusts, he shot his hot load onto your waiting tongue.

"That was good." He tucked himself away into his pants and extended his hand to help you up.

"I've gotta go." He kissed your cheek. "I've got a meeting with that new group in 20 minutes. Have fun okay."

He opened the door and he was gone. No sexual reciprocation, no I love you, just a, "have fun."

It wasn't like him and you were left trying to determine if he was giving you the cold shoulder because he was upset or even worse, if he wasn't upset about you leaving at all.

An abrupt knock on the door broke you out of your thoughts. All worries were forgotten when you opened it to find Jungkook grinning ear to ear.

"Are you ready Noona? The car's gonna be here in 10 minutes."

Grabbing your bag off the bed, he flung it over his shoulder like it was nothing.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world. Have you thought about your birthday wish?"

He pulled you in with his free hand. "You've already made it happen. I can't believe I get you all to myself for 2 days."

You pulled the door shut behind you and kissed him. "I'm all about making birthday wishes come true."

The car rolled up the tarmac where the private plane sat in wait. The red-carpeted stairs extended, greeting you like royalty.

"You booked a private flight?"

His nose scrunched in happiness at your surprise. "Nothing but the best for you." He kissed the back of your hand before leading you up the stairs.

"You know this isn't supposed to be about me right?"

"I may have some ulterior motives." He said as he clicked his seatbelt into place.

"Yeah? Is this a mile-high club mission Jungkook?"

Even though your chairs were face to face and his eyes were hidden behind his bucket hat, his smile said it all.

"Trust the plan Noona."

Shortly after takeoff, the intercom dinged. "You may proceed to move around the cabin freely."

Jungkook unfastened his seatbelt and stood to lean over your seat. Grabbing the side lever, he reclined your chair back and moved in for a passionate kiss that immediately made your toes curl in anticipation.

Humming in delight he broke away and knelt on the floor. His fingers dragged delicately up your skirt. "What am I going to find under here, how well do you know what I like?" Pulling your thighs apart he sucked air through his grinning lips. "No panties. You really do know. "

"It's easy." You felt desperate for the pleasure you knew he was capable of inflicting. "We both always want the same thing."

"And what is it we want, Noona? Hmm, tell me."He was staring, lost in the sight of his fingers toying with your sex.

Reaching out you tipped his chin until his eyes locked with yours. God, you wanted to but couldn't.

You had to stop yourself from telling him that what you really wanted was more than 48 hours. You bit your tongue to keep it from spilling the words, "I want to run away with you and never go back." So instead, you went with what was easy and what you thought he wanted to hear. "I think we want to cum at 32,000 feet."

They must have been the words he was expecting because a devilish grin appeared at your response.

"48 hours," He lifted your foot to rest it on the seat." Of nothing," he lifted the other foot. Sliding his hands behind you, he pulled your hips forward. "but pure," He dropped his head and laid a long languid lick up your cunt.

"Pleasure." You finished the sentence not wanting him to use his mouth for anything else let alone words.

His hum of agreement sent shivers of anticipation down your spine. You gazed at his face intently. He liked when you watched. Splaying you open with his fingers, your engorged pink nub stood begging him for attention. You bit your lip trying to hold your noises in, squirming as he teased it with the tip of his tongue drawing slow circles around it.

You pulled at his long hair and begged, "Stop teasing me Kookie."

His mischievous amber eyes glinted under the cabin's bright lights. "It's an hour-long flight, and I forgot my headphones. You're just going to have to be my entertainment."

You hadn't touched each other in a while, and Yoongi had been too preoccupied with work to even notice you were around. Other than giving his pre-departure blow job you'd had no action in at least a week.

You knew if you whined enough he'd give in. "I can't be patient, when my pussy knows what it's been missing, Jungkook."

"You're spoiled," he mumbled into your cunt.

You tried to sit upright, but he held your hips down and stuck 2 fingers inside you.

"I'm spoiled? The last of the sentence trailed off quickly into soft submission under the strokes of his fingertips on your g spot.

"Is that better?" He took delight in knowing you were instant jello.

"I missed you."

His fingers kept a steady pace as he kissed you. Soft, constant, his tongue lingered, his mouth catching your moans.

"I just want you to feel good. Tell me where you want my mouth."

"Please Jungkook, you know what I want."

"Say it, for me, for my birthday." He was pouting in between kisses. "I just want to know that you want me."

"I want you so fucking bad Jungkook. I want you to suck on my tits and finger me until I cum."

He was grinding his cock against the edge of your seat when the plane started shaking.

"Please fasten your seatbelts. We're going through a patch of thermal turbulence that should only last a few minutes."The voice from the cockpit didn't phase either of you.

His free hand pulled your shirt up and your bra down, exposing your hardened nipples just above the lace cups. Grabbing the seatbelt, he clicked you in and pulled the strap tight. "Safety first," he barely muttered before locking on to your breast.

The plane shook violently, heightening every sensation. His fingers and the jolting of the plane had your pussy dripping down his hand. "Jungkook." Your moans were high and you couldn't care less if anybody heard. You were almost done. Watching him rut his hips against the vibration of the seat, eyes closed, as his mouth latched greedily at your chest was sending you into overdrive. "I'm gonna cum, are you gonna cum for me, baby?"

His face screwed up in pleasure and his moan was long and drawn. Seeing him reach his height, you clenched around his fingers as they continued their assault on your sex until you too were satisfied.

"Shit," he stood up revealing the huge wet spot in his jeans. "I don't have a change of clothes in my carry-on."

Undoing your seatbelt, you leaned forward and untucked his t-shirt making sure to kiss his abs along the way. Well, thank god for baggy shirts."

You tucked the last of your clothes inside the drawer. "So what's the first thing on our birthday weekend to-do list?"

"Well, there's parasailing, scuba diving, jet-skiing…." He kept listing.

"You know we can't do it all right? You're going to have to narrow down your choices a little."

"Aish, come on Noona. I brought you because I thought you could keep up."

You stood between his legs as he sat on the bed. "Is that why you brought me, Jungkook? Because we share an affinity for water sports?"

His hands groped your ass before he pulled you down on top of him.

"Amongst other things," he giggled while tickling you. "Jimin's fun to hang out with but he never puts out."

"Oh my god, Jungkook." You rolled your eyes and stood back up. "If we're going to get even one of those things on your list done we'd better leave now." You extended your hand to help him up. "Let's go."

____________________

You were soaked. Jungkook was taking great delight in the jumps he created by running the jet ski in circles over his own wake. Hanging on to his waist tightly you were surprised he could still breathe.

"Are you okay back there?" He stopped the watercraft to check-in. Do you want me to slow down?"

"Did you hear my safe word?" You took a teasing nip at his bare wet tricep."

"Not yet but I'd really like to."

A hot blush crept up your cheeks. It wasn't like Jungkook to suggest anything wild, and it threw you off.

"Are you asking?" You could see his ears turning red and he took a minute to answer.

"You're just hanging on so tight."

You didn't want him to hold back, so you prompted the response. "And…"

"The thought of me in control and you, a little scared, kind of turns me on."

Pressing your face against the expanse of his wet skin, you wondered if he could feel your smile.

"Do you see that island?"

You pointed. "I want you to take me over there."

"Do you want me to go fast?"

"I think we both want you to go fast."

"Then you should hold on."

As he restarted the jet ski your hands made their way back around him but this time they ended up in his shorts. Sneaking past the mesh liner, your fingers gave a little tug on his thick wet pubic hair. His already semi-hard cock came to life in your hand in anticipation of the attention it was about to receive.

There were no trespassing signs posted all around the small island. "I don't know Jungkook, maybe we should just go back and fuck in the room." You said it, not because you meant it, but because he wanted to play.

He pulled the ski up onto the shore. "You can't just tease me like that and make me wait, Noona. Let's go."

He began trekking into the patch of dense greenery, and you wondered if someone actually lived here.

Stopping just under sufficient cover of vegetation, he grabbed you and pulled your bathing suit bottoms down and pushed you against a nearby tree. "You're driving me crazy in this fucking bikini." He tugged his shorts down and needing no prep thrust himself into you.

The bark was rough against your skin, your back scraping with every upward thrust he pumped into you.

"Hello!" Echoed around you. "This is private property."

"Fuck, Jungkook, let's go!"

"I'm not done." He clamped his hand over your mouth. "Shhh, stop moaning so loud or they'll find us."

"I know you're out here I saw you seadoo on the shore." The voice carried across the island getting closer.

"Wrapping your leg around him, you grabbed his hair and moaned into his sweat-beaded neck. "We're gonna get caught, Kookie."

"Let them watch. I'm not stopping until I fill your cunt."

Your back felt raw, but the pleasure and pain of an adrenaline fuck was worth it.

"Are you afraid of someone seeing us? What happened to my brave girl?"

"Are you hurt, do you need help?"

The snapping sound of a twig breaking under a footstep was close. Too close, but also just enough of a thrill to spur on a hot flood of Jungkook's cum deep inside you.

Just as you got your bottoms back up the old man appeared.

"This is private property, are you looking for something?"

"Sorry," Jungkook turned on his charms." Our intake got clogged with some debris so we pulled over to clear it." He pointed at you, "you know women and their small bladders, she always has to go. She got scared when she heard you so we didn't answer. Sorry."

The old man laughed. "I've been married 4O years I know all too well.

You were surprised at Jungkook's ability to spin a story so quickly but more impressed that he was unflappable in his determination to cum at all cost.

Apologizing to the man once again you walked back to the jet ski.

"Shit are you okay?" He ran his fingertips gently down your back.

You stood on your toes and kissed his lips. "Did you hear my safe word?"

"I did not." He grinned.

"Well, I guess you'll just have to try harder next time."

____________________

His eyes rolled and he hummed in enjoyment. "Umm it's so good, it's like a dessert orgasm."

"I can't believe you're replacing me with chocolate." You pulled a pout. "Don't waste yourself on whipped cream Jungkook, I've got bigger plans for pleasure tonight."

"As much as I want to do unspeakable things to you, I'm not ready to go back to the room." He took the last bite and leaned back in his chair, stretching, completely satisfied. "I thought we could go to this place called Factory. Yugyeom told me it was really cool."

"Sounds fun." You couldn't help but grin at how naive his thinking was.

Licking your finger, you rubbed it through the powdered sugar on his plate and popped it in your mouth. "Silly you think we need a bed for me to get you off."

"You're a crazy woman."

"Crazy for you Jungkook."

The club was dark and crowded. He blended in well. The University students, looking to let loose for the weekend, offered a camouflage of anonymity he wasn't usually afforded in public spaces.

"Whiskey?" He took your hand and led you to the bar. "It's your weekend. I'm letting you call the shots." It was too loud to hear the groan you knew accompanied the eye roll at your bad pun but you were satisfied by his smile.

"To us." He clicked your glass.

The liquor went down smooth and warm, causing welcome tingles through your body. Coupled with the wine you'd had with dinner you'd hit the perfect peak of lowered inhibitions and pure bliss.

"Your glowing Noona." He kissed your forehead.

"And why wouldn't I be Kookie? I'm in paradise with my boyfriend. Come dance with me."

You noted the look of satisfaction on his face as he led you to the floor and wrapped his arms around you tightly. Nuzzling into your neck, he swayed with you slowly to a pace that didn't match the fast music of the club. Whether it was the alcohol or the sheer intoxication of longing you couldn't be sure, but you could feel his heart thumping against you.

Stopping completely, his hands cupped your face, and he stared into your eyes.

"What's wrong, Jungkook?"

His cheeks burned hot, and he was fighting his smile from appearing too eager. "Do you think you could call me your boyfriend again?"

You nodded. "I'd really like that."

His lips found yours and time stopped around you. Abandoning all common sense, you were both picturing what your together forever could look like.

He broke away out of breath and slightly overwhelmed.

"I think I'm ready to take you back to the hotel."

____________________

Stretching out naked and satisfied beside him you glanced at the clock, 12:36 am. You turned your head back and placed a kiss on his chest. "Happy birthday Kookie."

A little drunk and a lot in love you felt secure enough to ask. "Are you happy?

He let out a giggle, and you were 100% positive that if the lights were on his dimples would look like deep canyons etched into his cheeks.

"So happy…" his soft snores gave away just how content he was with the moment.

"I love you," you whispered. Maybe he wasn't awake but it counted. A full commitment to your feelings. Eager to reaffirm your words, you drifted off knowing that tomorrow you'd make sure he knew just how happy he made you.

"Where do you think you're sneaking off to?" He grabbed your hand and pulled you back down on top of him.

"I was getting up to call room service so you could have breakfast in bed." You feigned annoyance half-heartedly to getaway.

"Food can wait." He wrapped his arms around you and started kissing your neck. "It's the first time we've spent an entire night together. I really like waking up beside you."

"So you mean you don't want to go on that five-hour hike you booked months ago because you really, really, really wanted to do it?"

Surrendering into his stronghold, you teased him. "Because I'm totally okay just hitting up the spa."

He groaned in hangover.

"Shit. I totally forgot."

"Should I go order us some coffee and food now?"

"Probably."

"Are you going to let go of me?" You squirmed under his arm.

"Hmm...5 more minutes."He giggled, throwing his leg over you.

____________________

Pulling the car up to Mt. Hallasan you both stared at the daunting task before you. "Are you sure you can handle it?" He popped the trunk and grabbed your backpack.

"Do you doubt my abilities, Jeon?"

"Normally, no." He hoisted the bag onto your shoulders. "But this knapsack weighs a ton. Seriously, what's in here?"

"Mind your business and worry about yourself, sir." Raising his hands in apologetic surrender he closed the trunk, "Alright, let's get it!"

Trying to set a steady pace the timing had to work out just right. You couldn't tell if he was getting frustrated or being chivalrous, but at least once every half-hour he asked if you wanted him to take your bag.

"Did you know they don't let anyone climb after 1:30 because they don't want people stuck after sunset?"

"Is that your way of calling me slow, Kookie?" You stopped in your tracks and starred. "I didn't know you were so afraid of breaking the rules. Do you want to turn around and go back?"

"Noona, did you wake up this morning with the intention of being a pain in my ass?"

"That's just rude," you huffed. Arguing was one way to buy some time. "I can't believe you don't even appreciate that I'm out here climbing a fricken mountain for you."

"If you're serious, I'm sorry." He walked closer to you and kissed your cheek.

"It's fine." You walked away smiling. "Now if you'll stop stalling, we can still make the summit by sunset."

He paused, flabbergasted, but decided to stay quiet and move on.

____________________

Finally reaching your destination it was perfect. Sunset from the highest peak in Jeju was in full bloom. Everyone had been moved swiftly along by the trail guides, so it was just you, Jungkook, and the stunning view from 6388 feet above the world.

"Wow, look at this, Noona. We're on top of the world." He took off his backpack and dug for his camera.

"I feel that way whenever I'm with you, mountain or not." You tapped his shoulder and handed him the present you'd been carrying."

His eyes and smile were more dazzling than the sun glinting its way over the horizon. "Is this why you wouldn't let me carry the bag? It's so heavy."

"Open it!"

Tearing the paper off, his jaw dropped. "Is this a Hasselblad?"

You nodded. "Did I do good?"

"This is unbelievable! It's one of the best cameras in the world."

"I did a lot of research."

He was still in shock. "It's too much. I can't possibly accept this."

"Don't be silly Jungkook, It's all ready to go. I had them set it up for you. I was kind of hoping you'd take some pictures for us," You suddenly felt shy. "You know, so we can look back on this and remember how great it was."

"It's unbelievable. You're unbelievable!" All trepidation at accepting the gift forgotten, he began taking pictures.

By the time he was satisfied with the scenery, he turned to focus the lens on you.

His camera crosshairs found you sitting on the ground. A blanket, a bottle of wine and a cupcake with a candle. His smile peeked out from under the camera as he snapped your picture. "All this too?"

"I wish it was more but I could only carry so much." You passed him the bottle, "I couldn't fit cups, I hope you don't mind."

He leaned in for a kiss. "It's perfect. I honestly couldn't dream of a better day. Thank you."

"So are you going to get down here and blow out this candle before it's completely melted?"

He sat on his knees and closed his eyes. Concentration crept over his features until he seemed satisfied enough to blow.

"What could the man who has everything possibly wish for?"

He smiled brightly, "Don't jinx me. You know if I tell you it won't come true."

You wanted it to be about you, and you wanted it to come true so badly that you didn't ask any more questions.

"Come sit with me." He kissed the top of your head once you were settled, secure in his arms. "I should have gotten out of bed sooner. We could have had more time up here."

"You've got a few hours." You said it nonchalantly like you hadn't had to name-drop and beg the parks department.

"They're letting us hike after dark?"

"Sort of? There's an ATV waiting at the Seongpanak shelter we're going to use to get back down the mountain."

"I get to ride an all-terrain down the mountain?"

"Yeah, I thought you'd like that part."

____________________

The air in the room was cold as you stepped from the steamed-up bathroom. "It feels so good to get that hiking dirt off. You should have joined me.

"Rubbing the towel through your wet hair, you realized you were alone.

"Jungkook?" Checking through the suite's other rooms and even opening the hall doorway, he was nowhere to be found.

Glimpsing an out-of-place white shirt on the beach you made your way out the patio doors.

"Jungkook?" If he heard you coming, he didn't turn around.

Sitting behind him in the sand, you wrapped your arms and legs around him and squeezed. "It sure is a beautiful night." Sighing he leaned back to rest his head against you.

"Are you okay?" He didn't answer. He didn't need to. You could see the shimmer of his tears in the moonlight.

"What are we doing, Noona? How do we all come out of this happy?"

You wrapped your arms around him a little tighter.

"I don't know, Kookie. It was never supposed to be like this. I was silly to think I could ever resist your charms."

"Sure blame me."

At least he was grinning from your flattery now.

You ran your fingers through his hair and smiled trying to ease the heaviness.

"Do you see that Star up there?" The waves broke on the shore in the background. "I'm confident it will always lead me in the right direction."

"Like fate?"

"Like fate." You nodded, agreeing. "I'd really like to think that the universe had a reason to bring us together."

"What do you think the reason is?" Freeing himself from your embrace, he asked the question in all seriousness.

"Happiness." You answered like you knew. "Even if we can only have it in small increments."

"I can't believe you just live your life accepting that things will turn out. Does anything scare you Noona?"

It was against your better judgment, but his vulnerability always had a way of breaking down your walls. "Me?" You laughed. Perhaps he didn't know you as well as you thought.

"I'm terrified, Jungkook."

Taking notice of the new sadness in your eyes, he took your hand and held it patiently, waiting for your words.

"One day you're going to find someone who can give you their whole heart." The sobs came out loud and uncontrollably. "Without any compromises, you're going to finally have all the happiness and love you deserve. And I'll be watching it all from the sidelines, wondering if it could have been me."

"It can always be you. But that's your choice to make."

Salty tears fell down your cheeks, and you were too emotional for any words to come out coherently.

"Shhh, it's okay, I've got you." He encompassed you in his arms. "I'm sorry. Let's just enjoy the rest of our time here together." He looked at his watch. "We've still got 11 more hours before we have to give up the fantasy. Let's not think about the real world right now."

Raw, emotional and completely vulnerable. Everything you wanted in a man was right before you.

You sniffed feeling relieved the conversation, at least for now, was over. "11 hours huh? We can have sex at least 5 more times."

He stared with a look that almost bordered on pity. "You know I didn't ask you here just so we could have sex. I'm perfectly happy just getting to spend time with you."

"It's all I know, Jungkook. I don't know how to show people I love them without it." It was a sad truth. "Besides, you're really good at it."

A half-hearted smile graced his lips.

"Can we make an agreement?" He stood and reached to help you up.

"What's that?" You kissed him.

"What if instead of 5 times we just do it once. But properly."

Walking up the shore back to the room you kept stealing glances. His long dark curls and sun-bronzed skin shone in the moonlight accentuating his ethereal beauty. Your heart was happy and broken at the same time.

____________________

Laying naked in bed your heart was racing. You'd never felt nervous with Jungkook before, but this seemed different.

Something about your conversation on the beach had you playing the lyrics to "if I'd known it was the last time" through your head.

The sound of the shower shutting off struck a chord of permanence you weren't ready to face and a tear rolled off your cheek onto the pillow. Quickly wiping it away you didn't want your worry to ruin the last night you had together.

The bathroom door opened and Jungkook came out in a cloud of steam. Towel wrapped around his waist, the water droplets still clinging onto his chest made him look even more beautiful than you thought possible.

He smiled when he noticed your gaze and swiftly moved to untuck the small corner of terry cloth that secured his covering.

His lips were parted and his breath was heavy as he stood before you completely bare. His cock wasn't hard, and his display didn't even seem sexual. It was as if he was showing you his soul and you felt guilty not reciprocating his vulnerability.

Pulling the sheets back you swung your legs off the bed and walked over to where he stood. Face to face you pressed yourself against him, feeling his warmth radiate through you.

"I love you." He whispered.

Kissing down his chest you took your time letting your lips linger over every firm muscle. Licking hot wet stripes over his hardened nipples, his body shivered, goosebumps rising on his skin.

Not a word was spoken, you didn't need them. Everything was being said in a physical language that only the both of you were fluent in.

Your nose skimmed down the soft hairs that pathed his lower abdomen, his cock growing firmer the closer your mouth got to it.

Dropping to your knees, you took him in your hand stroking him reverently. Gorgeous and thick the freshly washed skin of his cock smelt like strawberries and you couldn't resist him a second longer.

Wrapping your lips around him, you sucked soft and slow. God how you wanted this to last all night.

"Noona." Your name slid softly out of his mouth while you suckled his length.

Lingering a bit longer, you wanted to remember how he looked right now. So full of pleasure, the kind only you'd ever given him. You hoped he'd never forget how good you were together.

When you stopped, he looked down and stroked your cheek. You could see in the deep brown sadness behind his eyes that he too was trying to harvest as many memories of the moment as he could.

He held his hand out to help you up and pulled you back in close to him. Tilting his head and displaying a sympathetic smile he didn't break eye contact as he danced with you towards the bed.

Despite the heavy air you couldn't help but giggle as he twirled you, lying you back onto the crisp white hotel sheets. Standing at the edge of the bed his large hands travelled down your thighs and spread them apart. It was his turn to take station on the floor. Starting at the inside of your knee he alternated kisses back and forth giving each leg equal attention until his mouth reached your needy mound.

As much as you wanted to watch, your eyes involuntarily clamped shut in pleasure as his tongue explored you.

A master with his mouth, he knew all of your hot spots. Circling your clit and teasing it to swollen attention he'd switch to slow methodical sucks, lips wrapped around your pink bud giving it head until you squirmed. As soon as you were close, he stiffened his tongue and fucked you with it, darting in and out and in.

As your legs started to shake at the onset of orgasm, a sign that he knew all too well, he revoked his mouth. Climbing on the bed he helped you pull your legs up and lay beside you. His hands travelled over your body slowly committing every one of your curves to his memory. His fingertips on your skin sent white lightening to your brain and his mouth latching onto your nipple made your insides roll like thunder.

"Jungkook…"

"Shhh.." He placed his mouth on yours and your heart panged at how much you missed his lips when they weren't attached to yours. As skilled as he was at everything else tongue-related, you wouldn't trade his kisses for any other sexual act in his repertoire.

Pausing his kiss, he locked his eyes with yours. A silent "are you ready?" passed between you.

With a simple nod, you pulled him back to you. His body moving from beside you to on top of you had your head reeling. The longing for satisfaction was fighting with your desire to drag this on all night.

You surrendered. You needed to stop thinking and to let yourself go to what you knew would be your last time.

Tipping your chin he once again connected to your longing lips while his hands slowly travelled down your thigh. Raising your leg and hooking it over his arm he created the perfect angle for entrance.

Pushing slowly, his girthy length slid into your sex and he paused.

Eyes closed, time stood still. The heavy anticipation hung in the air like a storm cloud.

He kissed you. Kissed you like it was the first time, the last time. His lips not once leaving yours as he softly made love to you.

You couldn't cum and you didn't care. The connection you were feeling with him right now was better than any orgasm.

You knew he was close and your heart was breaking at the realization that this was it. You didn't want him to think he hadn't satisfied you because he had. He had in so many more ways than you ever thought possible. Moaning in unison you cried out one last time as he filled you with a future that wasn't meant for you.

The kisses lingered until the activities of your long day finally defeated his longing to stay awake. His chest rose and fell with what you wished was a peaceful sleep.

Laying tucked under his arm, your cheek rested just over his heartbeat. "I love you too."

You'd both been awake a while but you lay in silence trying to absorb whatever last remnants of the weekend you could. Someone had to speak first, so you took the hit.

"We should probably get out of bed. Our flight leaves in 2 hours."

His fingers intertwined with yours and he lifted your hand to his lips.

"You were wrong on the plane, you know." He sighed and placed a small kiss on your knuckles. "When you said we always want the same thing."

You wiggled out of his embrace and propped yourself on an elbow to interrupt him. "Don't we? I thought we had a really good time this weekend."

"I did, but," he looked like he might cry. "You're lying there thinking about going home, and I'm running schemes through my head about how I can find a way for us to stay."

"Jungkook," you collapsed back into his side. "You know that's not how this works." A tear slipped from your eye and you hoped he wouldn't notice it. "We've had a good couple of days, let's not ruin it with what if's."

"All I have are what if's Noona.

I don't understand why you won't choose me."

You'd never seen him this upset before.

"Yoongi Hyung, he doesn't deserve you. If you were mine, I'd never share you. You'd get everything you needed from me, and you wouldn't have to go anywhere else to find it."

"It's not that simple, Jungkook."

"Well, it seems pretty simple to me. The only reason I can think of is that you don't really love me the way I love you."

Pulling away from him, you tucked your knees into your chest and wrapped your arms around yourself. His words made you feel like a small piece of nothing.

"Please don't ever believe that...I couldn't stand the thought of you not knowing how much I fucking love you."

He didn't move to comfort you, and you could tell this conversation wasn't going to steer easily. He was building a wall around his heart and you could feel it getting further away from you with every passing minute.

"Have you ever thought about what would actually happen if I left Yoongi for you?"

"Yeah, every damn day. We'd be happy, he'd get over it," He snapped defensively.

I'm not talking about you and me, Jungkook. I'm talking about you and him. Do you ever think about that? I can already see that this is fracturing your relationship with him."

He dropped his head in realization, still not looking you in the eye.

"Why are you doing this now?" Crying uncontrollably the words barely got out. "Why can't we just keep going on like this? I thought we were happy? I thought we were in love?"

His breath was shaky,

"I brought you here because I had to see. I pulled out all the stops to woo you and it still wasn't enough."

"So on the plane when you said, "trust the plan" you knew that it was going to end in an ultimatum? That even If I didn't choose you at least you'd get fucked a few more times?"

He stood his ground, face stoic until he finally looked at your tear-stained cheeks. His jaw relaxed and his sadness finally revealed itself.

"I can't be second place. Not with something that matters so much to me. Not with you."

He got out of bed and headed to the shower. "We'd better hurry up. Like you said, we don't want to miss our flight."

Other than formalities the next few hours were mostly empty.

Standing, waiting for your bags, Jungkook finally broke his silence.

"I sent Yoongi a message asking him to come get you. I think I'm gonna spend some time at my condo for a bit."

Perching the Sunglasses that disguised your swollen eyes on the top of your head, you gave it one last try. "I Love you Jungkook. Please don't do this…"

"We both know I'm not enough. What do you want from me?"

You were hyperventilating.

"I don't want to lose you."

He kissed your cheek in a way that seemed like it might be a real goodbye. "We both know there's only one way that can happen."

Grabbing the handle of his suitcase, he turned back a final time. "I had a really great birthday. I guess I'll see you around."

Making your way to the second Suburban in the pickup line, you stood and watched as Jungkook pulled away in the first. How were you going to hide how sad you were from Yoongi?

The driver came around and opened your door to expose the emptiness of the huge van.

"Where's Yoongi?"

"Sorry, we only received an airport pick-up call, ma'am. Will you be going back to the HYBE building today?"

"No, thanks. I don't think that I will."

____________________

Y/N: Hey

MIN: Hey! Sorry I couldn't come to meet you. So much work.

MIN: I hope you had a good time. MIN: Come down to the studio when you get back.

Y/N: I was thinking it would be nice for us to spend some alone time at the condo.

Y/N: Could you come after work? Take a few days off?

MIN: I can't just pick up and leave right now, but I'll see what I can do.

His lack of effort was really beginning to hurt.

Y/N: Whenever you can, I guess.

The blackout curtains were betraying you. The opening between the panels was just wide enough for a ray of sunlight to hit you directly in the face.

You yawned, "Yoon, I think we need to move to an underground bunker." Rolling over you were reminded by the cool smooth sheets that even though the condo was 10 minutes away from work he couldn't be bothered to come home yet again.

You reached for your phone. No messages.

Y/N: Hey babe, where are you? I haven't seen you for days.

The floor was cold as you made your way barefoot across the kitchen to start the coffee.

Still no response. Your stomach felt uneasy, he'd usually at least text. Picking up the phone you dialled.

"Hello?" His voice was raspy like he'd just woken up.

"Hey, I'm a little confused why I'm the only one here." You tried to keep your tone light, despite your aggravation.

"I'm sorry. I was heading out last night and PDog asked for help. He's trying to write for the new girl group and the lead's vocal style isn't meshing with his flow. I sat in on their session to see if I could help."

"Yoongi, are you ever going to take a break?"

"This is why I didn't text you. I don't need a lecture about it. They have a debut date and shit needs to get finished."

He sounded aggravated and if you had to guess he was most likely pushing his hair back, an anxious habit he had recently developed.

"I wish you'd work on us as much as you worked on your music."

"I thought you'd be thrilled that I'm busy. Where are your other boyfriends?"

You were crying again. "You're right Yoongi. I'd have to be absolutely stupid to want to spend any quality time alone with you."

"Fuck, Y/N. I'm sorry. I'm tired, okay?"You could hear him cover his phone but managed to make out a mumbled "I'll meet you downstairs." There was a pause and a door clicking shut. "When I'm done, I'll drive over and we'll spend the rest of the week together OK? I love you."

"You frustrate me to no end, Min Yoongi." You sighed at your own inability to stay angry with him. "I love you too."

____________________

Tired of opening one app after another, you tossed your phone on the couch beside you. You could sit here all day waiting for Yoongi, who probably wasn't going to show up anyway, or you could just head back to the dorms.

Even if he did manage to get away, his mind would still be on work. He'd just be trading one studio for another, and you knew he preferred the new HYBE equipment. At least there you could hang out with whoever was still around.

You were sure Jungkook would be at home. Joon was art hopping in Seoul, and Jin was in Uncle mode helping his brother settle in for their soon-to-be new baby. Everyone else would most likely be hanging around the offices.

Y/N: I'm incredibly bored, Jimin. I'm coming to visit.

Chim: Ohhhh, I'll play with you! I've got a new toy I think you might like.

Y/N: Intrigued 🤔

Chim: I'll be in the lounge. See you in ½ an hour?

Slinging the heavy duffle bag of things, you needed to return to Jungkook over your shoulder, you waited for the elevator. Just as it pinged Jimin came bouncing up the hall.

"What are you doing? Where are you going? I told you I have a surprise!"

"Can I just bring this stuff upstairs first?"

Breaking out the dimples and a cute head tilt he stared with puppy eyes until you agreed to follow.

You hurled the bag into his arms. "Fine but this better be good."

Pushing open the door he raised his eyebrows and grinned. "Ladies first!"

Stepping into the room, you were sure your jaw was almost on the floor. You pushed him backwards and slammed it shut behind you.

"Jimin what the fuck? There's a naked girl in there!"

He frowned at your unexpected reaction. "You don't like your present?"

"I really don't know what's going through your head. Who is she? You know you can't just do this with strangers."

"NDA's!! She's one of the new trainees, if she talks she'll get fired."

You scoffed at him. "No abuse of power there. This is a real dick move, Jimin."

"Well, it's not just me."

Your heart dropped into your stomach. "Who else?"

You watched his Adam's apple bulge in his throat with a hard swallow. He was clearly choosing his words carefully.

"Hobi"

"and?"

"Taehyung and I have already…" His words trailed off

"and?"

"That's it. I swear."

"Not Jungkook?" The thought turned your stomach.

Jimin rolled his eyes "You're kidding right? Jungkook is too whipped for you to even look at anyone else."

You sighed in relief but began to internally ponder why your first reaction was to ask about Jungkook and not Yoongi.

"I just…I don't understand why you'd think this is okay."

"You do crazy stuff with all of us all the time. I thought you'd be impressed."

Plopping onto the bench in the hallway, you were really taken aback.

"Jimin, I thought we were all in this together. A poly relationship doesn't include bringing in strangers. All of you sleeping with her is exposing me without my consent. I'd never do that to any of you."

He sighed like you had missed the point. "This is me asking for your consent. Yoongi thought you’d be down for it and that…"

"That what?" Your jaw was clenched. "You're my best fucking friend, Jimin, you'd better not lie to me."

He stammered in defeat. "That if I could get you and her together it would be easier to have her join in whenever with whoever."

"So Yoongi orchestrated this? Like this is an actual fucking conversation that took place between you?"

He knew he was fucked.

"Please don't tell him you know."

"Oh, I'm not gonna tell him anything."

Anger, blinding rage? Whatever it was motivating you, you pushed open the door and smiled. "Let's do this then."

Standing up she walked towards where you stood. Jimin, clearly surprised by the turn of events, was already hard and smiling while palming himself over his pants.

"What took so long? Jimin said you were always down to fuck." She was bold; it felt as If she was challenging you.

"Just trying to make sure you were screened. Dime a dozen groupie girls like you come riddled with diseases these days."

Grabbing her face tightly in your hand you kissed her hard before directing her backwards. "I'm the one in charge here. This is my game. If you want to play with the big kids, you'd better get back to the couch so I can see if that tongue is good for anything other than talking shit."

She smiled and lay back as Jimin undid his pants. Grinning like a high-school kid having sex for the first time, he stood stroking his cock while you pulled up your skirt and straddled her face.

He walked closer to you waving his dick at your mouth like he was on a fishing expedition.

"I don't think so. If I'm disposable, so are you."

"Can I at least fuck her then?"

You made him wait a bit before you answered. Making sure to play up your pleasure you threw your head back and closed your eyes while moaning. "You know Jimin, I think you made a mistake. I don't know if I'll need any of you if I can have this whenever I want it."

It was a lie. You were so angry you couldn't think straight let alone feel pleasure right now but you wanted it to sting.

You felt her smile slide over your wet pussy and she stuck her tongue in deep for good measure. It pissed you off that she thought she was winning you over.

"Go ahead Jimin, use her."

Excited that his plan was finally working, his demeanour changed back to how he'd met you at the door.

She spread her legs wide for him while he knelt between them on the couch.

"Stop! Where's the condom Jimin?" You scolded him. "You can't just raw dog a rando."

She laughed, and it made your blood boil. "Yoongi never mentioned how controlling you are. No wonder he wants to add me into the mix."

You froze, staring at Jimin. You were livid and couldn't believe any of them would want to have anything to do with her.

Getting up you calmly smoothed your dress back down your legs.

"Oh shit. You didn't know? I figured you pieced it together when you called this morning as I was leaving." She smiled coyly. "Sorry he hasn't been making it home the last few nights."

You thought back to your conversation this morning. He said, "I'll meet you downstairs." The dorms were on the upper levels, the studios on the lower.

You wanted to smack the smug look off of her face but instead walked out slamming the door.

Wiping tears away frantically, the facial recognition on the elevator wasn't processing you through your turmoil. The doors slid open and you ducked inside just as Jimin ran out to stop you.

Standing behind the closed doors you had to decide, Confront or hide? Your finger hovered, shaking as you pressed, Floor 12.

Running quickly you punched the memorized code into the keypad. Turning the handle you slid inside hoping to god that Jungkook wouldn't be there.

Resting your head on the door, you could barely breathe. What were you going to do?

Taking a deep breath you inhaled the comforting scent of Jungkook that permeated the walls of his Golden Closet Studio. You felt so stupid, you'd ruined everything with him and for what?

The knock startled you and you almost gasped revealing your hiding spot. You could hear them in the hall outside.

"She knows he's not here; she probably went back to the condo to get her things."

"I can't believe how badly you fucked this up, Jimin."

Jimin must have alerted Yoongi to the issue. The two men were now seemingly combing the building trying to find you.

"Me? I'm not the one who cheated, don't blame me."

Yoongi's voice was calm instead of sad. Damage control mode, you'd heard it before. It made you question if he was as worried about losing you as he was with protecting his career and the company from this scandal. "I didn't cheat. We only talked about it."

"I don't think Y/N sees that as any different Hyung."

"This is so bad." Hitting what was presumably his head against the door, the thud echoed around the room. "You'd better get your ass into Hitman Bangs office right now and explain to him why his latest girl group suddenly needs a new lead. We can't keep her around if she's going to act so indiscreetly."

"You have to fix this Yoongi. You know how much we all need Noona."

You heard the ding of the elevator and presumed they had both moved on but the quiet was broken when your phone vibrated, shaking the contents of your purse. Seconds later Yoongi's voice cut through the silence, he was leaving you a voicemail.

"I know you're angry. You have every right to be. Can we just talk about it? Give me a chance to explain myself. Tell me where you are, and we'll figure this out okay?"

You'd have to face him sooner or later, so you opened the door.

"Hey."

He looked relieved. "Hey. Can I come in?"

You nodded and held the door wide for him to enter.

"Jungkook's not here?"

You chewed your lip trying to stop yourself from having a complete breakdown. "No, he doesn't want to have anything to do with me anymore. I made it pretty clear that I would always choose you and he didn't take that so well."

"Fuck. I'm such an asshole. I had no idea." He couldn't look you in the eye, so he turned away. "How the hell did it come to this Y/N?"

You wanted to be mad, but you couldn't, you knew you were both to blame. Pressing your face into his back your tears left wet marks on his t-shirt. "I think we both know the answer to that."

"I should have let you go. I knew you were happier with him, but my pride didn't want to lose you like that."

"Yoongi, it's not all your fault."

"It is, though. The minute I felt relieved that I didn't have to put as much effort into our relationship anymore is the minute we should have had this conversation."

He turned to face you and wrapped his arms around you.

"I love you, and I need you to know that I didn't cheat on you. I thought about it but only because I was upset that you were with Jungkook."

You tried to interrupt, to defend yourself but he continued.

"I'm not blaming either of you. You two belong together."

You were frustrated that he couldn't have come to this conclusion sooner. "Well unfortunately, it's too late for that. He fucking hates me now."

The keypad beeped, and Jungkook, looking worn and sad, walked in apparently having overheard your last statement.

"I could never hate you Noona."

Your heart flipped in your chest. You didn't think you'd ever get to see him again.

"I owe you an apology Jungkook. I should have stepped aside when I saw how much you loved her."

Putting his hand on Jungkook's shoulder, Yoongi turned and gave you one last smile. "She needs you, go and take care of your girl."

Closing the door behind him, Yoongi took his leave.

"I'm sorry I came up here. I didn't know where else to go." You brushed the tears that had begun falling away with your fingertips. "I'll go."

He grabbed your hand, so you couldn't walk out. "No! There's no way I'm letting you go this time. I've been miserable the last few days without you."

It was his turn to cry. "Jimin sent me a message and said they needed help finding you. I got so scared that id never see you again."

He pulled you into his arms and kept placing small kisses on top of your head while apologies streamed from his lips.

"I'm so sorry. I swear I never had any intention of ending things when we went to Jeju. I didn't want to give you up but everything you said made sense and I didn't want to hurt Yoongi either."

"I love you so much Jungkook." Your body shook while you sobbed in his arms. "I'm so fucking sorry if I hurt you."

Picking you up in a bear hug he walked you to the couch. "I missed you so much, can we just lay here together for a while? I just want to hold you"

"I don't think we should, actually."

He pulled back, a puzzled look across his face.

"I'm so tired of dorm rooms and studios, Jungkook. I think it's time we try out something more permanent, you know? Just us. Like home?"

The sparkle in his eyes returned. "Like our home, because you're mine now?"

Your heart was full. You didn't need or want anything or anyone else.

"I'm all yours."

#jungkook #jungkook smut #bts smut #jeonjungkook #bts #kookie #nochu #studio sessions

[animereaderinsertwriter]

Cupbearer (Eren/Reader)

Part III

Part I

Part II

Part IV (in progress)

Warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT (im watching you, if you see this, begone!), vampire!eren, hunter!reader, fem!reader, smut, some amount of predator/prey dynamics but only kinda?? there is also a significant age difference but only cos eren is immortal and all that jazz. we're all adults here. there will eventually be smut.... and do i really need to say that there's gonna be blood in a vampire fic?

Description: A story of falling in love in 4 parts.

Eren is a bad man (well, a bad Creature) who has done bad things. When he meets the great-great-great granddaughter of one of his former friends in his favorite blood bar, however, he thinks it might not matter so much what happened in the past, so long as he can make the future something worth living to see.

Ao3 link here

After that night, it became increasingly hard for (Y/N) to leave, and for Eren to let her do so.

Something between them had changed. There were moments— when Eren would press feather-light kisses against her forehead, when he would casually leave a cup of her favorite tea where she would find it— where (Y/N) felt as though her heart might burst. It was all the little things that baffled her, all the ways in which he seemed to understand exactly how she felt; it was as though he knew her more than she knew herself. On the mornings that she would wake in his bed, sleepy and sticky and wholly content, (Y/N) wondered what it would be like to have this life forever.

Other days— on days like today— she was reminded exactly why that could never be, and it broke her heart.

Today, they had planned a romantic dinner in the park, an evening under the stars. It was supposed to be something special, a little getaway just for the two of them; they had wanted to leave as soon as (Y/N) was relieved from her patrol, so Eren had moved her things to his place, hoping that they could leave together from there for their evening alone.

In and of itself, that was fine… but when (Y/N) came in, covered head-to-toe in viscous Creature blood, Eren was furious.

“And you call me a monster,” he growled, looking her up and down with hate in his eyes. “I can’t believe you.”

He stood from his seat on the sofa, and (Y/N) began to back away, still wary from the fight she had narrowly escaped from unscathed. Her every instinct told her that she should run, fire a round of silver bullets into his chest, but she steeled herself, doing neither.

“It’s not my fault— they were attacking a civilian,” she told him as he stalked towards her, his face twisted into a horrific scowl. “I tried to stop them— tried to find out what was going on— but then they came at me with their claws, and I was left with no choice.”

“There is always a choice,” he snarled, and it was then that anger filled (Y/N) from the soles of her feet to the crown of her head. "They were probably terrified of you— how could you possibly blame them for lashing out?"

(Y/N) grit her teeth.

“This, from the man who thought genocide was his only option to the same problem?”

Eren made a low, warning sound in the back of his throat, but (Y/N) pressed on.

“You would rather me have died?” she demanded, stepping into his space. “Would it have pleased you more for my body to bleed out on the pavement, ripped to shreds by an aggressive werewolf? Would you even care, or would you just find the next blood bag and move on with your life?”

“Maybe so,” he shot back, “Then I wouldn’t have to deal with your insufferable mouth.”

That stung— but if there was one thing (Y/N) knew how to do, it was to strike back twice as hard as she had been struck.

“Fine then,” she said, turning on her heel. “I won’t bother you any longer. I’ll go out and find someone who actually wants my company, someone who’ll fuck me good and proper over the counter at some hole-in-the-wall bar over on Easy Street, someone younger, with a nicer cock and less fucking baggage— ”

She didn’t get to finish the sentence, or even walk a single step further— Eren grabbed her by the hair and pulled her to him, his fist painfully tight against her scalp.

“Wanna say that again, to my face?” he asked, tilting her head back.

“I’ll go find someone else to fuck me,” she spat, struggling in vain against him. “I’ll spread my legs for the next available schmuck in the closest bar I can find, so you can hear me scream his name and not yours.”

It was a low blow, to threaten a vampire’s claim on something they had previously assumed had belonged to them, but (Y/N) didn’t care. She had almost died today, and she’d be damned if she was going to take shit from anyone about what she had to do to survive. If Eren wanted a fight, she would damn sure give him one.

“Like hell you will,” he told her, pulling her head back so that she had to strain to remain standing. “You’re mine. Flesh of my flesh, blood of my blood— you are my Companion.”

"I belong to no one!"

Those words ripped from her throat and echoed throughout the empty house, and it was then that Eren stopped, looking at her with calculation in his gaze.

"You're right," he said, releasing her hair. "No mortal can serve two masters, lest they love one and despise the other; an archaic religious concept, but an accurate one nonetheless. You've made it abundantly clear where your loyalty lies. I was a fool for thinking otherwise."

(Y/N) began to tremble. "Eren, what are you saying?"

"I release you from our pact," he replied coldly, his eyes so dull and lifeless that it sent a chill down her spine. "No longer are you bound to be my wine-press— I free you from me."

"Eren—"

"Go," he commanded, and (Y/N) felt terribly, horribly empty.

Once, he would have told her to come freely, go safely, and leave something of the happiness she brought him; now, he gave her a cold dismissal, and it frightened her more than she was willing to admit. Still, she went, feeling hollow and used, and she didn't bother to shut the door behind her as she turned to walk home, weary from the day and sick from fighting.

***

Armin had lived for a very long time, but even so, he had yet to meet anyone so foul of temper as Eren when the Hunger was on him.

"Eren, you have to feed."

The vampire, as ill in health as in temper, glared weakly at him. "I'm not hungry."

"But you are Hungry, and don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about. Look, if this is about that girl—"

"I told you not to speak of her!"

Ah, so it was about her. By the looks of him, it had been two weeks since Eren had fed; Armin would bet that he hadn't seen her in the same amount of time.

"If I need to, I'll drag her here to make up with you myself," said Armin testily, "I refuse to watch my best friend starve himself because he refuses to feed on anyone else."

"You will not touch her."

Armin rolled his eyes, but didn't say anything further. He just patted Eren's arm in farewell and set about finding the little lady who was the root cause of his current consternation.

It took longer than Armin had anticipated to find the young woman who had, for all intents and purposes, completely unraveled Eren's composure; her scent, while thick and memorable in Eren's apartment, was hard to track otherwise. Armin spent two hours just wandering the city while trying to catch a breath of it here or there, and when he finally did manage to catch a whiff of her scent and follow it to her, he understood exactly why it had been so hard to track her down.

The girl was a Hunter, of all things.

When Armin found her, she was knee-deep in sewage, her knife embedded to the hilt in the skull of what appeared to be some species of winged reptile. Armin, having been a tad desperate and not actually having been expecting to find anything when he lifted the lid to the man-hole on 32nd and Main, was surprised to say the least— and when (Y/N) ripped her knife free and readjusted her stance into a defensive one directed at him, his surprise turned to intrigue.

“Er, hello there,” he said, scratching the back of his head. “I don’t suppose you’ll take my word for it that I just want to chat, will you?”

Curiously, the words gave the woman pause. She relaxed her stance ever-so-slightly, and then her eyes lit up with recognition.

“Armin Arlert?” she queried, craning her neck up to see him. “Is that you?”

This one grows curiouser and curiouser, he thought, but responded affirmatively.

“Can you give me a bit, then?” she asked, kicking the corpse of the Creature she’d just killed. “I’m not exactly fit for company. Perhaps we could meet later for a discussion over tea?”

“I’m afraid it’s urgent,” he said as she knelt to decapitate her prey— likely for proof of victory. “I think you know why I’m here, so you understand that time is of the essence.”

She didn’t look up at him as she replied.

“If this is about Eren, then I don’t have time to talk.”

Her tone was hard, bitter, and matter-of-fact, and it reminded Armin so much of Jean that it hurt… but just like Jean, Armin would bet that she could be won over by appealing to her inherent sense of human decency

“He’s suffering (Y/N),” he said, awkwardly crouching above the manhole so that she could better see the truth written in his eyes. “He won’t feed.”

“That’s hardly my problem.”

And oh, how well Armin knew that state of mind. If there was one thing Eren Jaeger knew how to do, it was push away the people who loved him most. Armin had dealt with that particularly lovely quirk of his for centuries, and it never got easier to deal with no matter how much time passed. If anything, it got more difficult the older they both got.

“When you’re the solution to a problem, you become a part of it whether you like it or not,” Armin replied, patient and understanding. “He cares for you.”

(Y/N) looked up at him then, fury in her eyes.

“He hurt me.”

Armin shrugged. “He hurts everyone he cares about. It’s just who he is. Nothing comes for free— least of all the love and loyalty of someone as old and as powerful as Eren.”

“Your heart may be toughened to his meanness,” she told him, the head of the creature she’d slain in her hands, “But mine is not, and I don’t like him well enough to willfully remain for him to use as an emotional punching bag.”

At that, Armin couldn’t help but let loose a wry grin.

“No,” he said, “I should think not; but I do think you love him well enough to make sure he doesn’t starve himself to death because he can’t have you.”

(Y/N) was silent for a long moment, then she crossed her arms.

“I won’t come crawling to him. He’s going to have to come to me.”

Armin grimaced. He wasn’t looking forward to that conversation.

“Is that at all negotiable?”

(Y/N) shook her head. “Absolutely not.”

Well, there was nothing for it.

“And you will let him feed if he comes to you?”

(Y/N) thought, then nodded. “If he proves himself deserving.”

Armin couldn't help himself; he laughed. Eren might have met his match in this one.

"Very well. I'll work my magic, and you work yours."

She nodded and bade him farewell, but before Armin left, he paused.

"Hey, (Y/N)?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

With that, he left her, ready to take Eren by the ear and throw him at her if he had to.

***

(Y/N)'s heart was racing as she opened the door, knowing good and well who would be behind it.

After her little talk with Armin— and the near heart attack he had given her in the process— she had called in to Zeke and told him she needed to go home to deal with an emergency. A replacement for her patrols had been sent, and she had come home to wash the grim from her skin, making herself as presentable as possible with the time she had. (Y/N) was worried, so worried, that the filth she had been wading in earlier would have left a lingering stench, or even that it had affected the taste of her; she had scrubbed and scrubbed until her skin was raw, hoping to erase every last remnant of her day from her skin…but as it turned out, she needn't have bothered.

Two, three, four hours later, and Eren hadn't shown— it was only now, right at the six hour mark, that he had decided to come to her.

Needless to say, (Y/N) was… less than pleased, but when she opened the door to find Eren pale and drawn, with dark circles beneath his eyes, her heart softened ever-so-slightly. It seemed that Armin was right; he had been suffering.

"You look like shit," she told him quietly, opening her door widely to let him in.

"I assure you, I feel worse," Eren grumbled, but stepped in as she closed the door behind him.

For a long, awkward moment, they just looked at each other, silent and unsure. It was unsettling how unlike himself Eren seemed; he was almost soft when he looked at her, and (Y/N) didn't know how to feel about it. Eventually, though, like two opposite ends of a magnet, they were drawn together, and Eren brushed a piece of hair back from her face.

"Hi," he said, his voice low and rough. (Y/N) caught his hand in hers before it could fall from her hair, and she pressed it against her chest, keeping it trapped there, touching the skin above her beating heart.

"Hey."

They watched each other a moment more before the dam broke between them, and they both spoke at once.

"I'm sorry."

A shared grin, a shy laugh— and then (Y/N) said what they both were thinking.

"You need to feed first, and talk later," she told him, her hand still clasped in his. "You're not off the hook, but I doubt we can have any real conversation with you like this."

Eren nodded gratefully, tugging at her wrist— his usual biting spot— but (Y/N) shook her head, indicating her neck. The thickest, richest blood, she knew, would come from there; and if there was ever a time to be generous with the placement of Eren's bite, she figured that it would be now.

The worst of it was over quickly. There was a brief sting at the intrusion of razor-sharp fangs, and then the vaguely uncomfortable feeling of having something poking down into places that decidedly should not be poked at all, but then (Y/N) quickly eased into the rhythm of the act, focusing wholly on the way Eren's lips felt against her skin. In a few moments, she would become pleasantly light-headed, and then Eren would pull away and look at her like she'd hung the stars. Oh, how she'd missed that look! (Y/N) found herself longing for it even before she quite realized it.

And then, without warning, a vision came, and (Y/N) was swept into another world entirely.

The evening sky rolled endlessly out towards the horizon; it seemed to go on forever, sparkling with more stars than (Y/N) had ever seen before. The full moon was so bright that it cast the whole world in what seemed like silver sunlight, and (Y/N) wondered how anyone could sleep on a night such as this. It was far too beautiful an experience to miss.

Alongside her— alongside Eren, through whose eyes she saw the world— strode Armin and two older-looking cadets who she recognized from previous memories as Reiner and Berthold. Eren was feeling anxious over something, and Reiner and Berthold were… well, they were kind. Reiner especially seemed to be like an older brother, and Eren admired him.

"You'll do just fine tomorrow," said Reiner, placing a large, warm hand on Eren's shoulder. "I'm certain of it."

The memory ended, and (Y/N) came back to herself as Eren's tongue laved over the wounds his fangs had left in her neck, sealing them.

"See anything?" he asked, his breath warm against her skin, and (Y/N) nodded.

"You loved them, too," she said softly, remembering the fondness Eren had felt as though it had been her own. "You loved the Hunters that tried to take everything from you, and— and I think they loved you, too."

Eren pulled away from her, and it was then that she saw the tears shining in his eyes.

"Yes," he replied, his voice broken. "We were children. How could we not love each other as God intended? Hate was never in our nature; it was an inheritance that we couldn't escape."

He paused for a moment, then spoke again.

"I'm sorry I hurt you," he told her, cupping her cheek in his hand. "I lost my temper. I forget— I forget that you're not them."

And (Y/N) understood. She understood that no matter how many centuries passed, there would be wounds that just wouldn't heal for Eren. He would lash out at things that wouldn't make sense to anyone who hadn't experienced the horrors of war as he had. Suddenly, she felt petty for having lashed out as she had, and guilt threatened to rise up and choke her.

"You're forgiven," she replied, leaning into his touch. "It takes two to tango— I shouldn't have baited you like I did. I knew how badly that would hurt you, and that's exactly why I said it."

At that, Eren cracked a grin.

"I expect nothing less from a Kirschtein. Your grandfather would have punched me square in the jaw— and as big as that bastard got when we were older, he probably would have put me on my ass."

(Y/N) couldn't help but laugh, and Eren joined her, their combined joy swelling until there was nothing else in the world but their happiness.

How they started kissing, neither one of them would be able to say afterwards, but in the grand scheme of things, it hardly mattered. Their love was too large to contain, too much to hold back— and it was love, (Y/N) realized, though she hadn't quite put words to it yet. She loved Eren Jaeger, a Creature, a monster, as much as her grandfather before her had and more. She loved him with a desperation that felt like being knocked over by an ocean wave and plunged into depths where her feet no longer touched the sand. She loved him more than she had ever loved anyone before.

And, as he placed her gently on her bed that was barely big enough for two, divesting himself of his shirt above her, (Y/N) thought that maybe she didn't mind it so much as long as he loved her in return.

"I missed you," said Eren, dropping kisses by her ear as he unhooked her bra. "I missed this."

"Me too," she gasped as his mouth wandered to her nipple, her hands fisting in his hair. "Oh, God, I missed you too."

The time for words was soon gone, however; Eren's sinful, sinful mouth traveled lower and lower until he was kissing at the insides of her thighs, parting them to access what lay between, and (Y/N) threw her head back as he spread her open with his hands and sucked brazenly at her clit.

How long he spent there, worshipping her sex, (Y/N) had no idea; all she knew was that she came once from his mouth on her and a second time from his fingers inside her, and when he finally, mercifully withdrew, she was broken down to the simplest parts of herself; there was nothing left but an affection so deep that it threatened to overtake her if she didn't let it out, and she did the only thing she knew to do to release the overwhelming pressure that was building in her chest as Eren pushed his big, veiny cock into her.

She told him what she should have said a long time ago.

"Oh, Eren," she gasped as his cockhead shoved deep inside her. "I love you."

As soon as the words came out of her mouth, Eren went unnaturally still. He looked at her with pupils blown wide inside emerald eyes, and his fangs slightly distended; in any other situation, (Y/N) might have laughed at how surprised he seemed, but it seemed as though she were frozen in time, unable to do anything but stare earnestly up at them, hoping he understood how much she cared for him.

"You… what?"

"I love you," she repeated, her body moving without her permission to roll her hips up into him, moving his cock even further inside her. "Please, Eren, I need—"

He cut her off with a forceful, bruising kiss, and his hips started making slow, deep thrusts inside her, her legs hiked up over his shoulders.

"Again," he said against her lips."Say it again."

"I love you."

Another thrust or two, a hand circling her wounded throat.

"Again."

"I love you, Eren."

"Again."

This time, it was only a whisper.

"I love you," she said, and Eren began fucking her in earnest.

"You are so fucking beautiful," he told her as he thrust hard and deep inside her. "You're every man's dream, a nirvana the damned such as myself were never meant to reach. (Y/N), you are everything, and I—"

He seemed to choke on the words, and (Y/N) kissed him as he tried to regain his composure.

"I don't deserve you," he said, shaking with the force of their passion. "I don't deserve your love."

It's not about deserving, she wanted to say, It never was, but then she was coming again, her climax contracting her walls around her lover, and it was all she could do to remain conscious as Eren fucked her relentlessly through it all, chasing his own high.

It was only later, after a shower and something to eat that they finally spoke again. They were back in bed, and Eren's arm was wrapped around her, as though he were afraid to let her go for even a moment; truthfully, (Y/N) thought he was asleep, but then his breath tickled her ear as he said,

"I love you, angel."

And that, (Y/N) thought, had been worth it all, in the end.

#aot x y/n #aot x reader #aot #aot fanfiction #eren x reader #vampire!eren jaeger #aot smut

[fanficsrusz]

I WANT TO KI__ YOU - FINAL CHAPTER

Warnings: Kidnapping, Dub-Con, Non-con, Stockholm Syndrome, Being Restrained, Breeding, murder, everything bad.

PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. IF YOU FIND ANY OF THESE WARNINGS TRIGGERING, THEN DO NOT READ. BY CONTINUING TO READ FROM THIS POINT ON, YOU ARE AGREEING THAT YOU ARE COMFORTABLE WITH ALL OF THE ABOVE WARNINGS. I DO NOT ACCEPT ANY RESPONSIBILITY IF YOU FEEL TRIGGERED BY THE FOLLOWING CONTENT SINCE THERE HAS BEEN PLENTY OF WARNINGS. IF YOU FEEL LIKE ANY OTHER WARNINGS SHOULD BE ADDED THEN PLEASE POLITELY DM ME AND I WILL ADD THEM.

Word Count: 2.7k

Summary: Summery: After failing to fulfill his contract, John takes a liking to y/n and his liking soon turns into a dark obsession

Aesthetic Playlist

A/n: After a billion years, a billion mental breakdowns and just about everything else, I have finally mustered up the courage to finish this series. I don't know how to feel.

I hope you all enjoy this chapter and I look forward to reading all your comments and feedback. If you liked this chapter then please reblog it. That is how writers like myself are able to spread out work to other people, especially because there have been a lot of issues with tags lately. Thank you ❤️

<< Previous Chapter

The taste of his lips was something that she should hate. It's something that she should crave to loaf. But even after everything he put her through, he was the sweetest poison.  

John was like an elegantly bound book but in a language she couldn't read. Y/n never thought she would love all the bad things about someone but there she stood, staring out into the openness of the forest through the front door. 

The door was there as if her dream had become solid, as if it had grown upon the hinges and blossomed into a comforting hue. An exit. A way out of the nightmare she found herself in. In all the time she had been trapped in the house, the door had remained a mystery to her. Not that she didn't know what laid beyond it, but the idea of what she would do when she saw the day it was held open for that long. 

She realised in the air that had been so still on the previous days had suddenly gained a slight movement, as if it had discovered its direction yet was content to meander at its own pace. The autumn breeze that carried fine drops, each one a promise of the rain to come.  Newly chilled air that moved the clouds, streaks of brilliance breaking through from a patient sun.

 Y/n let her eyes rest for a moment, feeling the ambiance of nothing, hearing the sounds, taking in the aroma, letting her brain process what laid ahead. 

John came behind, his lips grazing her hair as he pressed a chaste kiss upon her head. 

"I need an answer." 

His voice came as a whisper but had a firmness to it as he waited for their fate to be sealed. 

Choices were rarely a fork of two pathways, yet with eyes a little wider open, many pathways appeared before her. The right path for one person can be different from another and only the inner compass of love and passion could illuminate it for that soul to walk upon.

"I-" her lips parted, the single syllable falling from her mouth before she stopped. Her eyes clenched shut, images of her past life flashing through her mind, her heart thumping as the emotions of what she had lost pumped through her. 

Before she could even register her own existence in her new life, her feet had pulled her from John's hold. 

She could feel her heartbeat… every single pound in her chest. This great pounding, this great pressure; every beat. She could hear it, she could feel it. It remained steady with every step she took closer to the door, it remained through what little breaths she could shove down her throat. It remained when she stood and swayed at the threshold. That dark beating remained, as she waited for her own choice to take hold of her body. 

With a shaky hand she took hold of the new wooden door, a sigh leaving her as she pushed the door shut, sealing her inside the house and sealing her fate with no other exit. Just like that any glimmer of escape faded away coldly into infinite darkness. Y/n's skin shuddered and she could feel her brain starting to defocus, searching for new hope. She should have gone … out there, to the forest where the paths ran in every direction and she could be free. But one thing and one thing alone stopped her. 

Aurora. 

John's hand creeped up her arm, offering her a caring touch. 

"Thank you" he whispered, breath hot on the back of her neck.

"For what?" her voice came out hostile, sadness prominent in her tone. 

"You chose me -" he smiled, "you chose us. You chose Aurora. You chose love." his arms circled her waist, pulling her closer to his icy warmth. "I can't believe you finally recognised the importance of what we have. You've finally learnt to appreciate it all and that's all I ever wanted from you". 

Sadness sat an inch below Y/n's face, eyes remaining dry, expression impassive. She knew that if she even let a fraction out that the rest would follow, a never ending torrent of grief. She moved nothing but her eyes, her mind racing while every muscle stayed rock still against John's hold. 

"I just needed you to see it with your own eyes, to have you understand that this could be a wonderful life, that we can build a perfect, loving, family" John let his mind wander within the walls of his own fantasy. 

"Just think about it. Think about all the good things we can do together here. We can be happy, we can enjoy each other as much as we want without having to worry about the world out there and all the bad things it brings -" he placed a heated kiss onto her skin, his teeth nipping lightly. 

That warm, raspy voice that possessed his cords, sent nerves dancing up her spine. Normally his smile sent her mind into an uncontrolled, captivated spiral and his light touch lingered, it branded her soul with a simple mark: infatuation. To call it love would be a mockery of her heart, a symbol of her dying innocence. But every tempered word he spoke invaded her mind, like ivy tendrils seeking any point of weakness to enter; they wrapped her body in a blanket of comfort and consumed her soul in the heat of lust.

Y/n remembered that night John took her in a soft, painful haze. It was the night that taught her the difference between love and infatuation. Love is unconditional, eternal... Infatuation? It dies. 

Y/n had become infatuated with John to some degree. The sense of protection that he provided was something that she had never known. What else did she have other than John? But Aurora? She deserved better. Y/n loved her more than anything and she wasn't about to let her daughter live in four walls. Captive. Her beauty hidden away from the world. 

That wasn't a life she wanted for her. 

"-I only needed to know that you were convinced, that you had it in your heart" John continued, his lips peppering her skin with soft kisses. 

"well now you know" y/n whispered, eyes still glued to the closed door. 

"You know-" John gently turned her body, forcing her to look at him as his soft brown eyes studied her features for a moment, "-keeping you chained in that basement for the rest of your life was a possibility but that wasn't enough for me" 

Y/n felt the pad of his thumb rub against the wet skin of her cheek, rubbing away a few tears that had managed to quietly escape their fortress. 

"I wanted you to be here with me, so you could enjoy this life of ours without being kept like an animal." his eyes softened, eyebrows dipping kindly. "It was all necessary at first. Just a training process and I only kept you like that because you needed it" 

Y/n knew it was wrong what he did. But why did it hurt to know what she would do? 

"I understand" she whispered, her own hands wrapping around his waist as she buried her face in his chest. With a deep breath she took note of all the musky sweet notes of his scents. John rested his head on top of hers, his smile uncontrollable. 

"it was like the medicine you needed to take" John let out a small laugh as he thought back. "you were this small little disobedient puppy. It was cute honestly but it was just something you needed to go through to get stronger. And now look at you!" he pulled back, holding her at arms length so be count admire her perfect face. "you're so beautiful and So loyal" 

John kissed the droplets of tears from her lips, and she felt his lips smile against hers. He swept her hair aside and kissed her just over the collarbone. He nibbled at her ear, and then sank himself into her arms. She hung her fingers on his waistband, dragging him closer and he buried his face in her shoulder curve, his hands flexing around her back. John gave a reduced groan before whispering “I love you,” into her hair. 

"So do I" she mustered back. 

"I can't believe you finally see me for what I really am. Your family. Your soulmate. Your world. Of course that world includes Aurora. Her future brothers and sisters. We will have all we need right here" he placed another kiss onto her forehead. "we can build something new, something perfect and you are the one who made it all possible. You - you have no idea how special you are to me my love." 

John stepped back, extending his hand for her to take and Y/n slowly took it into hers. 

"I will never let you go. No matter what happens, I will always find you."

-

Three days later 

The perfect life for the perfect wife. That's what Y/n told herself daily, over and over. 

Y/n had been baking for a few hours and as the moments passed, tune by tune as the radio sang along, the piles of cookies, buns and breads grew. It was the same as mess, only the good sort she supposed, the edible sort that made people happy. That would make her happy. 

Aurora sat in her highchair, cooing softly as Y/n plated a few cookies and turned slowly, smiling as she watched her daughter stare up at her. 

She placed the plate on that table and kissed Aurora on the forehead. 

"No matter what happens. I love you" she breathed heavily and pulled back when she heard John step into the kitchen. 

"Good morning" Y/n smiled, wiping some of the drool from Aurora's face. 

John rounded the table and kissed y/n on the cheek before kissing Aurora's head. 

"Good morning my loves". 

For a moment there was silence in the large room and y/n shifted on her feet. 

"What are you going to do today?" John finally asked, pulling a glass from the cupboard and filling it with some water. 

Y/n shook her head slowly. 

"I don't know. Maybe clean. Play with Aurora. I baked some cookies already" John's eyes lit up as he walked over to the table, smiling as he picked up a warm cookie. 

"You made these?" he asked and y/n only hummed. 

"Mhmm" 

John kissed her cheek and Y/n savoured the feeling of his lingering touch before she turned around to face him. 

"Try it. Tell me how it is". 

John smirked before lifting the cookie to her mouth. 

"oh no. I've already eaten so many of them. I made them specially for you" 

"Such a good wife" John smiled. The cookie skimmed his lips before he shoved it into his mouth, letting the buttery goodness explode against his tongue. 

"Wow" he exclaimed, "This is really good". Y/n’s eyes lit up with excitement as she watched him eat a second cookie without hesitation. 

"Good. I'm glad you like them". 

John lifted his glass of water to his lips before he felt something wash over him. Something he hadn't felt… Ever. 

His hand extended towards Y/n as he tried to grab her, reaching out for support but she only pulled away, the smile she wore still on her face as she watched him intently. 

John breathed heavily but the air just wouldn't go in, like his lungs were surrounded by metal bands. Next came the rising panic, the dizzy feeling and the need to get low to the ground. The exertion brought on more breathlessness, like the air around him was devoid of oxygen. His ribs heaved up and down but no benefit came.

"Y.. Y/n…" his wheezing voice called out to her but she only stepped back. 

The poison was made to mimic an efficient virus, to kill the host fast. A few drops here and there and the decay set in, a sort of race to the bottom. The best part? She didn't even know what it was. She just read the bottle that John had stashed away and shoved it into the batter. If there was one thing she learnt from her mother was that love was the best blindfold for any plan. 

Y/n picked up Aurora, cradling her in her arms as she watched John gasp for breath. In his glassy eyes that stared up at her, she saw her reflection and she saw that what she was doing was the right thing. 

"You were and always have been a - monster" the words seemed to burn her tongue but she ignored the pain it caused. "You will never be able to find me or her again. Goodbye John" 

As the blackness finally began to consume him once and for all, he watched as his love pulled open the front door, her shadowy figure slowly fading into the darkness as he also did. 

-

3 months later. 

"Thank you, detective" y/n pushed the papers into her handbag before placing the bag back onto that handle of the pram. Aurora laid asleep in her arms and y/n slowly stood up. 

"No worries" the detective smiled kindly before reaching out over the table, stopping y/n from moving any more. "-and just so you know, I'm sorry. I know there isn't anything I can say that can fix everything that happened to you but You're safe now. We won't let anything else happen." y/n smiled softly and placed her hand on top of his reassuringly. 

"It's okay. You searched and you couldn't find me. There isn't anything anyone could have done. He… Was different. He was smart". 

The detective shook his head and pulled his hand away, burying them in piles of paper. 

"he was a monster for what he did". 

Y/n felt the tears well in the back of her eyes as she felt her throat turn dry. 

"I-" before she could even think of anything to say, Aurora began to cry and y/n laughed, shaking the pain of her aching heart away. "-I should really get her home". 

"Of course". He led y/n to the door, holding it open for her as they began to proceed down the corridor. 

"There's still quite a few reporters out there so it's best you take the back exit. Officer Hughes will swing by your place later on to check in" 

"Oh. Terry? He doesn't have to. He's been doing that everyday for the past three months -" 

"Nonsense. It's the least we could do". 

Y/n smiled and looked down at her watch. 

"Thank you so much detective. I'll see you later" 

"see ya". 

Y/n left the building and sighed as she heard the loud noise of the city and wind around her, the warm sun warming her body just as the first few drops of rain fell from the sky. 

"Let's get you home" she whispered to her daughter, pushing the pram towards home. 

-

The cafe that y/n lived above laid ahead, just around the corner and y/n couldn't wait to get her feet up. It's royal blue paint glistening under the closed sky was definitely a sight for sore eyes. She could just about see the large sign, decorated with droplets of water that hung on like glistening jewels. "Gloria's."

 Outside the sidewalk that would bustle in a few short hours was quiet, the concrete oblivious to whether it was midday or midnight. Y/n’s face smirked upward at the sight of the flower planter to the right, the city has put in new blooms that will give flashes of sunny yellows and hot pinks through the springtime. If she stopped walking right now she could almost hear the heartbeat of the city, quiet, like the ticking of an old Grandfather clock.

Her mind was too preoccupied with the world around her and y/n didn't notice the figure that hid under the umbrella that she nearly ran over. 

"Oh I'm so sorry!" y/n exclaimed, extending her hand to steady the person. Y/n waited patiently for the person's response, waiting to make sure she didn't hurt them. 

Then she heard it, the dark, low chuckle that made her spine tingle. 

"You're just as polite as the first time, Princess" 

The end.

Tags

@gwenebear @celestiaelisia @blondieee-me @harrisongslimited @wittysunflower @persephonehemingway @derangedcupcake @wholelottatiffy @babygirltaina @doodooloo700 @keanu-fics @drunkonyellow @xxinvisiblexx @krazycags01 @sgt-morgan @futuristic-imbecile @assassinscross @sanctuarygirl @beyond-antares @92lnbr @imblackmagicwoman @iloveconstantine @tnu-ree @lea-6 @keanuarch @urlil-brat @whatcolourisanorange @moonlit-raven-haven @keanuchillz @thehoundking @madprincessinabox @lovelypapug @lunilate

@luckyfiction17 @kinlovecody @xo-dragonette-xo @nicimixerxoxo @a-really-bi-girl @curly-minnie @daniallh @ddl9819 @blondekel77 @plaidshirtsandpizza @marvelsbitch123 @bluelunam @reddhead95 @sagekeanu @scarletmoon83 @mrspeacem1nusone @paanchu786 @the-thighs-of-betrayal @mary-ann84 @messingniall @awessomness @angelic-kisses13 @gian-giannina @keanureeefs @dr-kayleigh-dh @ficsnroses

(rest of tags will be added in reblogs)

#Keanu reeves #John Wick #john wick x you #john wick x reader #john wick #john wick imagine #keanu reeves oneshot

[swordofpevensie]

Anything I Do, I Know You’re Gonna Watch 

[Chapter • I]

warnings: academic rivals to lovers, set in 1946, peter x you, strict family, mentions of nervousness, stress, war, uni students (equal of stress actually), both peter and you study medicine because i love the idea of peter being a doctor, i emphasize peter was a king a lot (because like,, why not?).

a/n: i strongly needed an academic rivals to lovers fic with peter, so i wrote it myself eheh. i don't know how long it will be or how frequently i'll share because uni is literally crushing me. anyways, wow i am so excited to share this with you. there might be mistakes as english is not my native language, feel free to correct me please. also, i checked the oxford's website to get the info about uni & lecture. still, if there is something wrong, please inform me. i sincerely hope you like it, please tell me what you think. ♡

word count: 1067.

playlist: (yes, as i'm so excited that i even made a playlist)

oh johnny, oh johnny, oh! • the andrew sisters

campus • vampire weekend

heartburn • wafia

collide • tianamajor9, earthgang

you haunt me • sir sly

killer queen • fil bo riva

willow • taylor swift

d is for dangerous • arctic monkeys

tear you apart • she wants revenge

are you gonna be my girl • jet

braindead! • yungblud

greek god • conan gray (the song that gave the story its title)

tighten up • the black keys

achilles come down • gang of youths

library pictures • arctic monkeys

anna sun • walk the moon

everybody talks • neon trees

hey now • the regrettes

rumors • sabrina claudio, zayn

lover i don't have to love • bright eyes

you always hurt the one you love • the mills brothers

C H A P T E R • I

You took a deep breath before entering the classroom. It was the first class of the first day of your first year in the university and you felt very nervous and excited at the same time.

You were nervous because university was something new in your life and you had so many worries such as if you would find someone to be friends with, if you would be successful, if you would something embarrassing, if your professor would like you or not.

However you were excited because as a person who liked learning, you looked forward to attend to your classes and meet all of the new subjects waiting to be learnt. You had worked so hard to be there, in this university and in front of this classroom door, and finally being there felt amazing.

You took a step and entered the classroom. It was noisy and already crowded. It was a normal classroom, not a amphitheater one. You shortly looked around and saw a empty seat which was behind a crowded boy group. You walked towards there, trying to stay calm and not look at them. Your mother warned you very seriously and strictly about not getting closer with boys. She wanted you to be successful, not more. Boys were distraction according to her and she never wanted you hear that you got closer with a boy.

You sit and put your bag to the seat next to you. You took your notebook and pen out and started waiting for professor to come.

“Hey, isn't it Pevensie?” You heard a boy in front of you speaking.

“It really is.” Another boy replied. “I am surprised that he is here. I heard he couldn't afford the fees.”

“He probably got a scholarship. Don't you remember such a big nerd he was?”

“Ugh,” The boy said. “He was unbearable. I bet he hasn't changed. Probably still a caring brother everyone appreciates and the best student every teacher adores.” Although the words he used was in fact good, it was clear from his voice that he was mocking.

You frowned. Why did they talk about him in that way? Why did that Pevensie do? You look at the door that the boys were looking.

You saw a tall and broad shouldered boy with blonde hair and blue eyes. He wore a white shirt with dark brown trousers. His boots were also brown. His black coat was on his arm. He had a leather messenger bag hanging on his shoulder. He looked just like any boy in the classroom, except for the fact that there was something strange in the way he walked and stood. His steps were slow, however his walking made him seem strong. When he first stood up looking for a place to sit, you saw that he stood very upright, his chin was up a little bit. Nothing about him was underestimating, his eyes didn't look others in that way. But he just seemed strong, in a weird way that you had to gaze at him to figure out.

Then you realized what you were doing and looked directly to your notebook. You thought he didn't see you but he did. He smiled to himself but fastly stopped and went to sit to the empty chair which was away from yours. It was the only empty chair left, otherwise, he would like to sit near you and find out the reason behind your curious looks.

Thankfully, the professor came and started talking. The whole class was silent now. You focused on the professor and every word she said, sometimes took notes down. She introduced herself, the lecture, and said she'd start although this is the first day.

The subject was about the relationship between patients and doctors and the professor asked how the relationship should be in general.

You and he raised hands immediately. You were so excited and ready to answer because you spent your holiday with studying beforehand for the lectures. You went to libraries, read everything you found related to your courses.

He was quicker than you, so professor chose him to speak.

“Peter Pevensie,” He introduced himself.

“Yes, Mr. Pevensie,”

His answer didn't last too long but he expressed his opinions easily and quickly. You noticed he spoke somehow wisely and as if someone asked him to give advice. You couldn't understand why he spoke like this but then you thought you were paying attention to him so much. Therefore you took a short breath and focused on the professor again.

After he was done, you raised your hand and the professor let you speak.

“Y/N Y/L/N,” After introducing yourself, you started to express your opinions, which were the opposite of what Peter said. You thought doctors could be emotional and friends with their patients while Peter said doctors must be logical and distant.

He turned his head and looked at you, watched you as you spoke. He liked that there was someone he could compete with and share his ideas, also argue. He liked to argue because he thought arguing respectfully was a way that someone can improve themselves.

After you finished, three more students began to speak however Peter didn't pay attention because he still was watching you and analyzing you. He carefully looked at your clothes, how you kept shaking your leg, how you kept notes and listened very carefully. He was glad that there was somebody he could try to be friends with but above all, compete and beat. That was an old habit of him, competing and beating.

Like they said, the leopard can't change its spots.

Throughout the lecture, you and he constantly raised your hands, spoke, and listened very attentively. Everything you and he said opposed each other. At some point, you thought he did that on purpose, maybe he was objecting to your ideas deliberately just to annoy you. But then you thought why would someone at your age do such thing? You decided to not care at all. You weren't supposed to think about anyone, you were supposed to think about your lessons.

That was what you were thinking when the class was over and you were leaving the classroom to go and buy a coffee.

On the other hand, Peter was thinking about you, but he had some plans. Plans that included defeating you and being the best in the department.

okay, okay, it really happened. i finished writing. oh god i am so excited about this fic! please tell me what you think. i hope you enjoy reading!

love, andrea. ♡

#andreaiswriting #narnia #the chronicles of narnia #narnia fanfiction #peter pevensie #narnia imagine #narnia fic #peter pevensie imagine #peter pevensie fanfic #peter pevensie fanfiction #peter pevensie fic #academic rivals to lovers #peterpevensie #high king peter x you #high king peter the magnificent #peterpevensiefanfiction

[nureyev-steel-institute]

Characters: Jonah Magnus, Peter Lukas

Relationships: Peter Lukas & Jonah Magnus, Elias Bouchard|Jonah Magnus/Peter Lukas

Additional Tags: Elf!Jonah, selkie!Peter, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Pre-Relationship

Summary: They met in his library.

Lonely Eyes Week Day 3: Fantasy AU

They met in his library.

It wasn’t an unusual location for Jonah to be in. He often spent his time reading there, researching all sorts of topics he wanted to be knowledgeable about (which was everything). After visiting daily for a couple of weeks, Jonah figured that the library itself was abandoned and that the only way the books were in decent condition was through the way magic wove itself through the pages and the walls of the building. So he eventually started staying longer and longer, no longer worried about finding himself at the wrong end of a librarian's patience. After spending so many years alone, rarely venturing out, taking care of the library and the library taking care of him, he was very much surprised when one rainy night someone stumbled into his library, dripping water all over the floor.

“Good lord, are you alright?” he rushed over to the stranger. They didn’t respond, staring off into the distance. They were absolutely soaked as well. Jonah gently laid a hand on the other arm, intending to guide him away from the door, but the man violently jerked away from his touch. Jonah stepped back.

“So no touch then…” He looked around, unsure of what to do. Jonah walked to the door and fully shut it so that rain wouldn't get in. He went to the fireplace he was sitting near earlier, stoking it and bringing a bit more warmth to where they were. Then Jonah sat down to wait.

It wasn't too long until the man seemed to become aware of his surroundings. He looked up from the ground and made a confused face, looking around the library. Jonah cleared his throat, and the man's gaze snapped to him.

"I-I'm sorry um. Who are you?" He asked, shivering. Jonah smiled in what he hoped was a calming way.

"My name is James,” he said, unwilling to give out his true identity to a complete stranger. “And you are?"

“I’m Peter.”

Silence. Peter didn’t move from his spot but seemed to be uncomfortable. Either with Jonah’s presence or the stilted start to a conversation. Well, Jonah wasn’t going to leave his library, and he wasn’t going to push Peter out into the rain either. He stood up and walked a bit closer to the taller man. Peter visibly tensed.

“Are you going to take off your coat?” It was a reasonable question. It looked heavy and underneath it, his clothing seemed to be wet. To dry off, Peter would need to take it off and hang it up somewhere. But as soon as Jonah finished the sentence, Peter took a step back and only wrapped it tighter around him. Gods above, how he wasn’t uncomfortable with all of that wet fabric clinging to his skin… Jonah wrinkled his nose in vague discomfort at even the thought of it.

“No. You can’t have my coat.” Peter cut through Jonah’s thoughts. He looked ready to bolt. Jonah stepped back. At that, Peter’s grip on his coat loosened slightly, but not by much.

“I’m not asking for it,” Jonah reassured him in a low voice, “However, you need to get dry. Having that coat on wouldn’t help.”

“You’ll let me keep it?”

Jonah frowned. What in the world...? “Of course. I do not want your coat. You can keep it as long as you like.” Peter relaxed almost completely at that, and he seemed to droop slightly from exhaustion. Jonah sighed. As much as he would like to feed his curiosity and question Peter all night, he seemed to be at least somewhat human. And humans had the very time-consuming need to sleep.

“I’ll take you to a separate room if you’d like? You can rest there.” Peter nodded, so Jonah turned around and led him out of the seemingly endless maze of books.

Jonah didn’t use his bedroom for rest. As an elf, he didn’t need to sleep and only entered a trance if he needed to. That, he often did by the fireplace at his usual seat. While lying down is more comfortable, it wasn't necessary, and Jonah found no need to constantly go back to that room. He did, however, find a hall of various bedrooms and claimed one to store his things. Various trinkets that caught his eye, clothes, and other things he either needed or wanted.

He led Peter to that hall, past his own door, and to the next. They opened the door. Inside was a simple bed, a closet, and a bedside table. Other than that, the room was devoid of anything. Jonah stepped back and let Peter walk in. He slowly walked around the room, as if making sure it was really empty. When he finished, he stood and stared at Jonah.

"Can you leave? Please?" Jonah made a small 'oh' face.

"Right, of course." And he closed the door.

_____

As soon as Peter heard James’s footsteps lead away from the door, he quickly scrambled to find a hiding place for his coat. He stuffed it in the very distant corner of the closet, vowing to find a better spot for it soon. No one will take it from him. Never again.

He dropped down on the bed. Peter felt all of the exhaustion he was putting off crash into him. When was the last time he slept? And when was the last time he actually got to rest?

Peter knew that James shouldn't be trusted. He only just met him after all. But he was so tired…

It didn't take long for Peter to lay back and melt into the covers and finally rest.

____

When Jonah returned from the market at around midday, Peter was still asleep. Jonah went up another floor to the communal space and the kitchen.

When he first started exploring the library fully, it seemed a bit odd that it would have clear living spaces. The bedrooms and the kitchen were the ones that confused him the most because it meant that beings didn’t just come here during the day to read, they stayed here for many nights at a time. As much as Jonah loved living in the library, he knew from experience that many thought otherwise.

That is, of course, until he found the historical records of the library itself.

About seventy or so years into his stay, Jonah found a new door. Of course, this was nothing new. He finds new doors relatively often, and with a library as large, as ancient, and as magical as this one, he expects to find many more doors and halls in the future. Regardless, every time he uncovers a previously unexplored part of the library he spends days, if not weeks, in that section. There is always something new to find. But the records….

They dated back over a thousand years. A group of scholars of various classes and races befriended each other and built the library to store their records of adventures they had. It grew as people began donating accounts of their own adventures, then began giving spell books, so on and so forth. As the library accumulated more and more information it began to attract more people who desperately wanted to learn. More sections were added. A living hall was built so that long-term residents and scholars from far away lands could stay comfortably within the walls to study. The library was very well taken care of at its peak. Charms were added to protect the books from age and dust. Experienced magical users wove protective spells into the walls and into the ground.

Jonah did not know what exactly happened that left the library so empty. The records stopped abruptly around 700 years after its opening, around 300 years ago. He itched to find out what happened, but so far there were no clues.

Jonah was harshly jerked away from his thoughts when he heard a throat clear behind him. He turned and found Peter standing awkwardly at the doorway, clearly unsure of what he should do.

"You can come in if you'd like. I'm going to start making food." Peter shuffled in. His tired air was still present but somewhat alleviated. It seemed that the long sleep he had did him well.

Peter waited patiently as Jonah made scrambled eggs, for which Jonah was grateful. It didn't take long for Jonah to plate the food and place a serving in front of the taller man. He hesitated, slowly grabbed his fork, and began to eat. Jonah did the same.

"So, Peter," Jonah said after the two of them were done eating. "How did you end up here?" Peter visibly swallowed, eyes darting to the side.

"I was just in the forest when it started raining. I got lost. Found a door. Next thing I know I'm in front of you."

Jonah frowned. "Is there a reason you were out in the forest so late? It was well past dark when it started raining, I believe, and even later than that when you arrived."

"I was…" Peter looked off to the side. "I was going somewhere."

"Where?"

"I don't know. Somewhere else."

"I can take you down to a nearby town if you want. There will probably be-" Peter shook his head sharply.

"No. No I- this is good." He said in a firm voice, standing his ground. Jonah studied Peter for a moment. The way he sat, hunched in on himself, making himself as small as possible. His hands were stuffed in his pockets, a contrast to when moments before he was fidgeting with them.

"You're welcome to stay as long as you'd like." Jonah relented. "It's been a while since the library had anyone other than myself in it."

Jonah might feel a bit less lonely with Peter around, after all.

#jonah magnus #peter lukas #tma #lonelyeyesweek2021 #my fic #lonely eyes

[blackdiamondwrites127]

Nightmare

A little follow up one shot to my Hal angst post. Hope y'all like it!

--------------------------------------------------

Catalina woke up in the middle of the night. She sits up and looks around.

Something was wrong.

She could feel it.

She looked beside her and found Jane sleeping peacefully. She allowed herself a small smile at the sight of her wife before focussing back on the task at hand. Carefully, she got out of bed and exited the room quietly so as to not wake up the slumbering silver queen. She stands out in the hallway for a while. Looking at the closed doors of her housemates. Deducting which one was out of place.

Then she noticed it.

The dark yellow door with a large white rabbit painted on it leading to her son's room was opened by a crack.

She goes over to it and knocks lightly. She waited. No answer. She knocks again. A bit louder this time. No answer again. She grabs the knob and gently pushed it open. She then takes a look inside the rabbit themed bedroom.

Empty.

Hal's bed looked recently used. His rabbit patterned blanket thrown back, his favourite rabbit plushie that Jane handmade for him since he was a baby was on the floor and his pink bunny slippers was missing from beside his bed. Catalina frowned and closed the door. She goes over to the bathroom and found it unlocked and empty after knocking and asking if anyone was there. She decides to move to her next destination of her investigation.

"Bugsy's in the kitchen."

The gold queen lets out a startled yelp and turns around to find Mae standing outside her bedroom door. Clad in light blue pj's with cat patterns on it, blue cat slippers on and her curly hair in a mess.

"Ay dios mio. You startled me. How did you...?" Catalina asked.

"He always goes to the kitchen whenever he's feeling down. Probably a nightmare again," Mae said.

"Again?"

The youngest Boleyn-Parr nodded. "I told him yesterday to talk to you or Aunt Jane about his nightmare but it seems that he didn't," she said.

"What was his nightmare even about?"

"It's not my place to tell. It's best that you talk to him."

"Okay. Thank you, Mae. You can go back to bed now," Catalina said.

Mae nodded again before going back in her room. Closing her light blue door shut. The first queen sighed and makes her way downstairs. Sure enough, the kitchen light was on and she could see Hal sitting on one of the barstools and hunched over the island counter. He was clad in his yellow rabbit printed pj's, his feet covered by his favourite pink bunny slippers and his curly brown hair messy and out of his usual bun.

"Mijo?" she called as she approached him.

The young prince sat upright upon hearing his mother's voice call out to him. Catalina could see him do a quick wiping motion to his face followed by hearing him sniffle.

"M-Ma, hey. What are you doing up so late?" he asked in an attempt to act fine but it failed due to his voice shaky and cracking.

"I should be the one asking you that. What's wrong?"

Catalina pulls out the barstool next to his and sat down. She took note of the glass of chocolate milk in his hand and the half empty jug of said chocolate milk next to it.

She distinctly remembers that that specific jug was bought just yesterday.

Drinking chocolate milk is always his go to drink whenever he's upset. And drinking about half a jug of newly bought chocolate milk worried the golden queen.

"I'm fine, ma. Nothing to worry about. I just can't sleep," Hal said. Turning to face her and giving her a forced smile that didn't reach his golden brown eyes.

"Drinking half a jug of newly bought chocolate milk in the middle of the night while crying is something to worry about. Mijo, tell me what's wrong," she said. Gently placing a hand on his shoulder.

His smile dropped from his face and he started to sob. His tears falling down his already tearstained face. Catalina gently pulls him in her arms and lets him cry on her shoulder for awhile. He held on to her tightly as he cried. Letting all his emotions pour out while his mother comfortingly rub circles on his back.

After a while, he pulls away and managed to collect himself.

"Sorry ma..." he said. Catalina gave him a reassuring smile as she wiped his tears away with her thumb.

"It's okay, mijo. Now, Mae mentioned about a nightmare that's been bothering you," she said.

He sighed and finished the last of his glass of chocolate milk. The first queen waited patiently for him to collect himself.

"It started when I decided to do more research on myself," Hal started.

She nodded. Signaling him to go on and that she'll listen. He took a deep breath and continued.

"I...I read some historians theorize about the events happening in history if I had lived up to adulthood. Obvious things like me being king and England staying as a catholic country and all that. But what really struck was the possibility of...father...not divorcing you and separating you and Mary. Leaving you to die alone..."

Catalina held his hand and gently squeezed it reassuringly. She said nothing. Just waiting for him to continue. She knew talking about their past lives is always hard for them.

"...it also made me think of the possibility of...him not marrying five more times and...mum and the others not suffering under his hand."

"Tell me about your nightmare," she said in a calm and quiet voice.

Hal takes a shuddering breath.

"I was...in a dark place. Then a spotlight was on and I saw...I saw a crown floating above my head. Then I felt a heavy weight on my right shoulder. When I looked, I realized...it was father's hand. He was standing next to me. Looming down on me with his heavy hand still on my shoulder. Then I heard a voice declare 'All hail King Henry IX'," he started.

Catalina listened intently to him. Hal continues his recount on his nightmare.

"I started to freak out. Everything was a blur now and I saw myself as king...I saw myself as father...doing the same atrocities he had done because I realized...in a world where I lived to adulthood...in a world where father was prevented in doing his atrocities...I would be the one to execute them instead..."

Hal's hands and voice were shaking by the time he finished and fresh tears welled up in his eyes and fell down his face. Dripping onto the cold tiles of the island counter. The first queen was quiet for awhile. Mulling over her son's words. She snaps out of her stupor when Hal suddenly spoke.

"Ma...do you think...I'm going to end up just like father...?"

She immediately pulls him closer to her.

"No. No you will not. You are Hal. You are MY son. Unless you actively seek out to be just like Henry, which I highly doubt you will, you will not end up like him," she said. Hal sobbed into her shirt as he held on to her tightly.

"B-But...I was named after him...I was born to be the next Henry..."

"Mijo, look at me."

Hal looks up at her. His tearful golden brown eyes meeting her golden ones. Catalina placed her hands on either side of his face and kissed his forehead briefly before looking at him again.

"You may be named Henry but that does not mean you are Henry. You are not a king who marries six times due to his obsession in having a son. You are a young boy with an obsession for rabbits and a passion for the culinary arts. You are Hal. Son of Catherine of Aragon and Jane Seymour. You're my little prince and you will always be my sweet and kind Hal," she said.

Hal gives her a genuine smile this time and she returned it with a smile of her own.

"Gracias mamá. I really needed to hear that," he said. Hugging her again. She kissed the top of his head and holds him closer.

"De nada, mijo. Think you can go back to bed now?"

"Uh...the chocolate milk sort of made me more awake."

Catalina chuckled. "Well then why don't we watch a movie until we both fall asleep?" she suggested.

Hal grins and hops off the barstool. Making his way to the living room to pick a movie. The golden queen smiled and followed her son. Flicking the kitchen light off before joining him on the couch. Zootopia already playing on the T.V.

Hal snuggled next to his mother as they watched his favourite movie for the umpteenth time.

--------------------------------------------------

Jane woke early as usual but what was unusual was the empty space next to her. Sure, Catalina often woke up early as well but she usually stayed in bed for another hour, wanting cuddles from her.

The silver queen gets up and gets dressed for the day. She goes downstairs to find Anna in the living room. Clad in her running clothes, holding a blanket in one hand and her phone in the other.

"Anna what--?"

The red queen cuts her off by shushing her. She then motions for her to come closer to the couch and look.

Jane walks over and couldn't help but gush at the sight that greeted her.

Catalina and Hal sleeping on the couch. The first queen had her arms wrapped protectively around her son and the young prince curled up quite comfortingly against his mother.

Anna takes a picture of the moment before draping the blanket over the slumbering mother and son.

"I found them sleeping here with Zootopia playing on repeat," Anna said.

"Hal probably couldn't sleep last night and Lina went down to keep him company," Jane said.

"Probably. It's best to let them sleep in. I'm off on my run."

"Yeah. Be careful and be back before breakfast."

The fourth queen nods and exits the house to go on her morning run. Jane looked back at her wife and son and smiled lovingly. She planted soft kisses on both of their foreheads before going to the kitchen to start on breakfast.

She didn't notice the empty glass and the half empty jug of chocolate milk still on the island counter.

#six #six the musical #sixtended verse #catherine of aragon (six) #catalina de aragon (six) #mae parr (six) #hal aragon (sixtended) #jane seymour (six) #anna von kleve (six) #anna of cleves (six) #minor aramour #my art #my writing

[pink-peony-princess]

I'll Always Be There for You

“Rise and shine Miniture Mendes,” I heard my older brother’s voice somewhere at the end of my bed.

I didn’t answer immediately, hoping that if I ignored him, he would go away. Realistically I knew I was kidding myself, and this was confirmed moments later, when I felt him sit at the end of the bed, poking my leg until I finally let out a grunt of annoyance.

“And she lives!” he cheered, as if he was commentating a grand final sports match.

“Shawn, it is seven. In the morning. On a Saturday, you better have a good reason for being in my bedroom, annoying me this early.” I warned, pulling the pillow over my head.

“Sure do,” he chimed, fighting to pull the pillow away from me. “Get up, get dressed, you have your yearly check-up today.”

The reaction was instant, and he was quick to notice it. “Don’t start Hailey, we went through this last time you had to come in,” he cautioned, and I could see from his face, that there was going to be no changing his mind.

“Shawn!” I groaned, whacking him with the pillow I had just had over my head. As much as I loved my brother, I hated him equally at times like this. He had just qualified as an attending paediatrics doctor, and was now working at the local hospital with a bunch of his friends. “I’m sixteen, can’t I look after myself?” I begged.

“Nope, last time I let you do that, you nearly ended up dying on Connor's O.R. table, because you thought that appendicitis was ‘nothing’, ” he reminded me, using air quotes for effect.

“Ahhh, don’t remind me. Fine,” I conceded. There was no point, I knew that. It wasn’t even that I really disliked the doctors or the hospital for that matter. I just really didn’t like having my brother in my medical care. I found it awkward, something which he would remind me constantly that wasn’t the case at all. Well even that was a lie, it did come in helpful sometimes.

“Be ready in twenty minutes,” he spoke, getting up, straightening his scrubs, and walking out.

Sighing, I sat up, grabbing my phone. Help! I wrote, sending it to Dave one of Shawn's friends, and a fellow doctor. I had known Shawn's friends, Dave, Brian and Connor since I was little, and considered them to be adoptive brothers.

There was a ping from my phone, as I was in the bathroom, cleaning myself up. He told you then. <3 was the response. I cursed internally, if Dave knew, then it meant that Shawn was serious. After all, most of the time Dave was the one in charge of my medical care.

Dumping my phone back on the bed, I went to the wardrobe and grabbed the most comfortable pair of track pants I could find and paired these with a crop top and a parker. I spent another few minutes faffing about in my room, trying to find ways out of this, but when I heard Shawn grabbing his coat and keys from the hallway, I made my way down stairs feeling defeated.

“I hate you,” I spoke, pushing past my brother and stepping out the from the front door. Only to hit a body, hard.

“Easy there Little Lady,” Dave spoke as he caught and steadied me. “What’s up? Those were some fighting words!” he let my arm go, stepping back to look at me.

“Don’t start D, I hate you too, you knew and you didn’t tell me!” I accused, stepping around him and heading for his car, which he and Shawn usually car-pooled to work in.

“She’s been like this since I woke her, she’s tried to get out of it more than once already,” Shawn fixed me with a stern stare, silently warning me not to cause mischief.

“You make out like I’m such a bad patient, you’re such a drama queen!” I laughed as we buckled in and made our way down the street.

“Maybe you are.” Was the only reply I got. The rest of the car ride was quiet, I couldn’t help but sulk at my predicament.

When we finally got there, I trailed behind the guys, listening to them discussing their schedules for the day. Most of which consisted of making sure that their interns and residents were doing what they should be. I couldn't help but feel a little proud of them as I thought of how far they had come.

“You ready Little Lady?” Dave's voice, pulled me from my thoughts, and it was only then that I noticed that we had made it inside to the front desk, where Amy, the receptionist, and one of my favourite people resided.

“Hi Hailey, how are you sweets?” she asked as she typed on the computer, before addressing Shawn “All good, it’s all set up for you.”

We made our way to the exam room quickly, Dave unlocking the door, and dumping his belongings on his desk and switching the computer on, no doubt so he could check my records.

“Do I have to?” I asked, eying the bed off furiously, once again frustrated at Shawn for making me do this.

“Yes, you do pretty girl, why don’t you just take a seat next to your bro for now, I’ve just got some questions for you first. Grumbling to myself, I slumped into the seat next to Shawn, resting my head on his shoulder.

“I thought you hated me?” he laughed, somewhat confused, but rubbing my scalp comfortingly anyway.

“I do,” I agreed. “But if I’m asleep, you can’t start the exam, because you must have consent to do anything,” I explained, trying to hide the smirk that was now forming at my genius conclusions.

“Touché What you failed to mention though, was that the parentals have given me autonomy over your medical care in their absence since you’re still under eighteen. So right back at you sister,” he sassed, clearly proud of himself.

“Okay, okay, it’s too early for me to have to adjudicate a fight between you two!” Dave laughed, turning to face me. “Okay, Hailey, some of these questions may be a little embarrassing, but answer honestly okay?”

I nodded, feeling apprehensive.

“Do you smoke?” he asked, pausing to look at me. I fixed him with a glare, making him laugh. “I’ll take that a no.”

I put up with the questions, most of them not as bad as I had imagined, until he asked the dreaded one. “What about your period?”

I turned to Shawn, silently fuming at him. “I had to Hailey, you’ve been struggling for months with it.”

“No! You didn’t actually, last time I checked, I was the one bleeding,not you!” I yelled, moving to get up and walk out.

“Hailey, wait honey. I know it’s awkward, but if you can tell me what’s been going on, I’ll be able to fix it,” Dave, tried to reason, waiting for me to sit back down before continuing. "Shawn said you get bad cramps?” he prompted.

“Bad, bad doesn’t even to describe it. I can’t move without feeling like I’m going to faint or be sick,” I told him honestly.

“Last night, I found her curled up in tears because of the pain, I had to get her some fairly strong stuff,” Shawn added, grabbing my hand and giving it a squeeze.

I shuddered thinking back to the previous night.

... Shawn had come home late, and came in to check on me like he always did, but instead of finding me in bed reading like normal, I was curled in a ball in my bed practically rocking as I tried to get the pain under control.

"Again?" he'd asked looking at me with pity.

I nodded, "It's so bad Shawnie," I hiccupped, tears flowing unchecked down my checks and landing in small pools on my bed.

"I'm going to get you some pain relief okay," he'd spoken, moving to brush some of the hair out if my face. "I know it hurts, but try not to get too worked up, the more upset you get, the more pain you'll be in," he explained gently, getting up and going to my bathroom. I could hear him searching through my cabinet before he asked, "What have you taken today Poppet?"

"Just Tylenol," I groaned out as another wave of pain hit me.

"Here take this." he held a blue packet out for me to take.

"What is it?" I asked, not recognising the packaging.

"It's called Napropgesic, it'll help with the pain. It'll help to block the release of some of the hormones that are making you feel so sick and sore," he explained, grabbing the water glass from beside my bed and handing it to me. "Take two," he added.

"Will you stay with me?" I asked, catching his hand as he went to leave the room.

"Of course, honey," he'd said, coming to lay next to me on the bed, allowing me to cuddle into his chest.

"Get some rest," he murmurned, kissing the top of my head.

...

“Okay, so you have it now. Is it like that every time?” Dave asked seriously bringing me back to the present,typing as he spoke.

I nodded, feeling the tears welling up, I was so over having to deal with it, I didn’t even care anymore if I had to tell them embarrassing stuff. “It’s okay Little Lady, we’ll get it sorted, how about we get the rest of the exam done, and then we can get this sorted for you okay?” Dave came to give me a quick hug.

“Hop up on the bed, yeah.” I did so, sitting waiting for him to tell me what to do.

“Right, I’m just going to listen to your heart and lungs,” he told me, after washing his hands. “Just lift your shirt a little,” he told me as he rubbed the bell of the stethoscope to warm it up. “Deep breathes,” he instructed, listening.

Turning my head, I saw Shawn watching intently, sending me a ‘thumbs up’ when he saw me looking at him. “Nothing out of the ordinary there, that’s always good,” Dave spoke, moving to take my pulse.

He was quiet again for a minute, watching the clock. “Hmm,” he finished,"Shawn come here for a second.”

Getting up, my brother made his way over, taking my pulse as Dave had only moments before. I let out a whine at the fact that I was being fussed over, causing Dave to take my hand.

"Your pulse is fast," Shawn spoke, stepping back to look at me.

"And?" I asked, looking between the two doctors.

"Well, it could be a couple of things," Dave started, going to get supplies from a cupboard above his desk. "It could indicate Anemia, which would help to explain some of the period issues, but it could be something like an infection too. And that my dear is something we don't want, especially with you having had your appendix out only a week and a half ago. Just lay back for us," he instructed.

Shawn helped me lay down, before pulling my clothing away from where my scar was on my stomach.

"Ow!" I whimpered as Dave removed the dressing, exposing a red, and somewhat oozy looking cut.

"Sorry Hailey, normally this wouldn't hurt so much, but this is infected."

"Look at that," Shawn pointed out, having gone to get gloves on himself. "That looks like she's had a reaction to the sutures."

" I'll get Connor in here after to assess it, he may want to try leaving in open for a little."

"Open?" I squeaked, shooting up from the bed.

"Hailey!" Shawn grumbled, " What have I told you? Slow movements!" He looked somewhat grumpy, but I didn't blame him. He had already had to repair the stitches once for me.

After explaining the fact that open only meant that they would pack it with medicated gauze, Dave left the room, stating he had to, "Get some supplies."

When he came back I let out a loud groan, in his hand, he was holding supplies for a blood draw. "Come on Hailey, you'll be fine," he encouraged, prepping me for it. " I'm going to let Shawn do it as he's a pro," he told me, moving to sit beside me on the bed.

"Don't look Hailey. Sharp scratch," he warned as Shawn inserted the needle. I couldn't help myself though, and found myself watching the red liquid being drawn from my arm. I could feel myself getting faint at the sight, and before I knew it, darkness hard over come me.

I woke to a light tapping sensation on my face, and someone's fingers pressed to the inside of my wrist. "Welcome back," Shawn spoke, somewhat sarcastically. "I thought we told you not to look."

"I couldn't help myself." I pouted, excepting Dave's help in sitting up.

"Just sit for a second, we don't want you fainting again," he laughed, before walking around his desk and picking up the phone.

Minutes later, the door opened and Shawn and Dave's friends and colleagues Brian and Connor came into the room.

"How's out favourite patient?" Brian asked coming over to hug me.

"You look pale," Connor noted, standing beside Shawn at the bed with a frown.

"She just fainted at the blood draw," Shawn explained, rolling his eyes playfully.

Neither one of them responded, instead sending me sympathetic smiles.

"So, Dave said you've been having sereve cramps with your period?" Brian asked, without a fuss.

I stayed silent for a second, before sighing, and nodding. I loved the guys like I loved my own brother, but there were some things I just wanted to keep private. Especially as Brian was an obgyn. " Where is the pain mostly?" He asked coming over to rest his hand on my lower back. I nodded again, causing him to press with only slight pressure. This slight pressure though, sent pain radiating throughout my whole abdominal area, and into my back, nausea hitting me like a ton of bricks.

"I'm gonna be sick!" I gasped, leaning over the pan that Shawn had rushed to grab off the shelf.

"I'm sorry Sweet Pea," Brian apologised, rubbing my back. "Well I can tell you now, that it's referred pain that's causing you all the problems. Basically, all the ligaments are attached, and as the uterus contracts, you get pain in other places. Some girls get it worse than other's though."

"And the vomiting?" I asked once I had recovered a little.

"That will be the hormones, it's not dissimilar to a pregnant woman and morning sickness," he explained. "Lots of rest, fluids, heating pads, pain killers and some ice cream should do the trick." he winked.

"And iron tablets," Dave added, coming back from the desk where he had remained since the phone call. "Your iron levels are dismal Little Lady, it's no wonder you're having such a bad time of it!"

Lastly it was Connor's turn to check on me. "Just lie down for me again darling," he spoke, getting a set of gloves on. He only had to look at the incision for about thirty seconds, before nodding. "That's infected alright. I'm actually surprised you're not getting other symptoms. When did you first notice it?" He asked as he replaced his gloves, and went to get antibacterial solution and more gauze.

"I hadn't until Dave took the dressing off, but it's really hurting now."

"We'll get it sorted for you, and get you some pain killers and antibiotics just to ward off further trouble. This is going to sting a bit honey," he warned as he dabbed the liquid onto the wound.

"Ah," I hissed, reaching for my brother's hand.

"Nearly done sis," Shawn encouraged, stroking my hair.

When Connor was done, he gave me a shot of fairly strong antibiotics and pain killers, telling Shawn to take me home and watch me closely for any signs of fever, which of course, he knew. I did try to tell them I was fine, but they shut me down before I even got a chance to finish the sentence.

" Hailey, your stitches are infected, meaning that your immune system is compromised, you're clearly in pain, let your brother do his job, and take you home," Dave interrupted seriously. I felt guilty after that, and so didn't complain when Shawn put his arm around me as we made our way back out of the hospital to get a cab home.

When we got there, he set me up on the sofa, with blankets and pain meds, telling me to give him a yell if I needed anything.

"Shawn?" I called, as he made his way upstairs to the office. "Thank you, and I'm sorry I'm a difficult patient," I told him sincerely.

"Don't mention it. I'll always be there for you, " he replied, coming back down the stairs and shifting me onto his lap. That was how I spent the remainder of the day, cuddled up to my brother, knowing that if I needed anything he would do it without question.

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes imagines #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes blurb #doctor!shawn #mendes triplets #werewolf!shawn

[youbloodymadgenius]

Over and over again (Modern!Ivar x reader)

A/N: Please, read the warnings!

This is for @a-mess-of-fandoms ‘s 400 followers writing challenge. The prompt I chose was: But I choose you, even when you’re not an option. This is the first time I've ever taken part in a writing challenge. Thank you 🌺

Ivar is significantly older in this one, in his early to mid-40s probably. 

@inforapound: I know how much I owe you 💖

Warnings: smut, angst, fluff. Breast cancer implied. 

Words: 1669

The gif belongs to @honestsycrets​ 💜

Light kisses…

Light kisses on your inner thigh wake you from a deep sleep. Dizzy, it takes you a few seconds to realize what is going on.

"Ivar…", supressing a yawn, you stretch lazily, "… what… what are you…"

"Shh… Don't talk my love. Just let me take care of you…"  

Even if you wanted to, you don't have time to object as his hot breath against your clit and his fingers grazing your folds make you moan.

"Hmm... So good…"

You manage to say, arching your back while gripping the sheets, shivers running through your body. He stops for a moment. The darkness doesn't allow you to see his eyes or his features clearly, but you know that his piercing blues eyes are looking towards you and you're sure that a cocky grin stretches across his handsome face.

"That's all I want, my love… I want you to feel good…"

His husky voice sends chills down your spine and you can't help but giggle, feeling free and oblivious to everything from the numb pain in your upper body to the struggles in your mind.

"Shh… Keep quiet and don't move my love, I'm not finished yet."

Adding force to his soft yet bossy words, his left arm settles down over your belly, preventing you from moving, as he lowers his head once again. Immediately whining as his mouth finds your core, you gasp when his tongue licks your folds before twirling around your clit. There's no rush though, and no harshness. In the privacy of your shared bed, Ivar has always known how to be gentle when necessary, even if he prefers rough sex.

Still, since you've been discharged, gentleness has become his mantra, soft kisses on your cheek or in the crook of your neck, grazing fingers along your thighs, delicate words of love whispered in your ear… Sometimes you feel like a porcelain doll… The truth is that's probably what you are. And that is definitely what you need.

Gliding his fingers in and out from you, you can feel him smile against your thigh as he readjusts his position, faintly groaning. You should be worried about his comfort but you cannot, not when his fingers are working wonders.

"Ivar I'm…"

"Yes my love, let it go."  Curling his fingers inside you, increasing the pace of his tongue on your clit, your fingers tangle themselves in his hair, clenching and unclenching, endlessly pulling his braids. Wrapping your shaking thighs around his head, your hands scratching at his scalp, you can't breathe anymore, stars blowing up in your head, tears filling your eyes. You come hard, shuddering, moaning, crying his name. Hopelessly.

Still slightly dazed, you suddenly freeze, barely able to talk.

"Ivar, what are…" His hard cock presses against your leg, his hand runs across your belly, up to your chest as your voice breaks. "Stop Ivar, I..." Your hand grabbing his arm, you beg him, swallowing before you can go on. "Ivar, no. I… I cannot…"

Placing his hand just above your navel, which he knows is a safe place, he speaks softly.

"I'm not turning on the light, you know that?"

"Ivar," you respond in a shaky voice, almost pleading, "you don't need your eyes to feel it."

Or the lack of it.

Moving you to tears, the thought makes you feel sick and you hiccup before freeing yourself from his grasp. You don't want to reject him but there's nothing you can do. You cannot. You cannot. You cannot.

Rolling on your side, curling up on yourself, you let your dark thoughts get the better of you. Ivar deserves so much better. You're not worthy anymore. You’ve denied him for so long, barely allowing him to pleasure you. He never complains. You'd like to, no you'd love to make love to him, again.

But you cannot.

You cannot.

You cannot.

Sobbing, you drown in self-pity, hating yourself for what you put him through, and for what you've become.  

You can hear him shift in the bed and when he groans, you raise your head to look at him, sitting straight against the headboard.

"What's wrong, Y/N?" His soft voice stirs you up, making you cry even more.

Fighting the panic setting down in your heart and your head, you take a sharp breath. "You know what's wrong, Ivar. Look at you! Look at us! Look what I am doing to us! I know you, you're craving for more. And you have every right to. But I can't give you more and that's not fair. You deserve better, better than me. You deserve everything I can never offer you again. You deserve joy and happiness and bliss, and you deserve to cum and—"

His pointer finger grazing your lips, he shushes you tenderly. "It's not about me, my love. I'm fine. Don't worry, I promise I'm fine. For now, it's all about you. So please, talk to me and keep in mind that I love you, no matter what. You do know that, don't you?"

One of his hands strokes your hair and baby kisses brush your temple, overwhelmed with his love, you wish you could let go. But as much as you would like to, you cannot.  

"I do. But sometimes love is not enough, Ivar.” Catching a half-choked and obviously outraged cry, you feel the need to explain, your entire body shaking. "Love is not pleasure, Ivar. Love is not sex. I cannot pleasure you. I cannot have sex with you. I. Can. Not. Not anymore." Your uneven breathing gives away your distress and you try pointlessly to steady it, inhaling deeply.  "Look at me, Ivar. Look what I am. I'm a mess. This… this fucking disease stole my femininity, stole who I was. I'm no longer the woman you knew, Ivar. I cannot be this woman anymore. I don’t know where she is, and I don't even know if she will ever come back. I'm not sure. Now, I'm just an empty shell, Ivar. A scarred and broken empty shell."

Anger. That's what you expect. You know Ivar, and you know your words hurt him deeply. But you have to tell him. He must understand.

You cannot. You cannot.

But there's no outburst. No fist hitting the mattress. No tightening grip. There's nothing but silence for a few longue minutes. When he speaks again, it's with a quavering voice.

"What are you trying to tell me, Y/N? What does it mean, my love?" Fear and distress noticeable in his words, you know he doesn't really want to hear what you're going to say. But you have to. He must understand.

"You deserve a whole woman, Ivar, and not who I became; an ugly and misshapen body. I can't look at myself in the mirror anymore. How could you?  How could you even look at me? Ivar, I'm no longer an option."

Your words exhausted you, drawing on what little strength you had left.  Weeping and crying, you bury your head into your pillow, wishing you could disappear and forget.

Ivar has a different take on it.

"Come here, Y/N, please."

Whispering and softly grasping your arm, he pulls you close, resting your head on his chest. Too weak, you don't try to fight back, allowing him to do so. Wrapping an arm around your shoulders, he grabs your hand, putting it on his thigh.  

You may be numb, but you know he's doing it on purpose. His thigh. His right leg. The worst. Scarred, bony, bumpy. Gruesome. Disgusting. Useless. They're not your words, they are his.

"You have no right to talk about yourself like that, my love." His firm tone startles you. "And I don't intend to hear any more of this nonsense."

"Ivar…", muttering, you wish you could argue, convince him, but he's talking again before you can collect your thoughts.

"No, my love. Now, you're going to listen to me. I wasn't an option. I couldn't be an option. Because of my temper. Because of my legs. Shit Y/N, I couldn't even walk when we met. A fucking cripple stuck in a fucking wheelchair because of his fucking repulsive and stupid legs! That's all I was. Nonetheless, you chose me. You did choose me, Y/N.  I still can't understand why, but you did. And for that I'm grateful every day. You taught me love, Y/N. But most of all, you taught me to love myself."

Sighing, he gently kisses your forehead as you snuggle into his arms. "And that's exactly what I'm going to do now. I'm going to teach you to love yourself again, as much as I love you. Because you deserve it, and because you're everything I want. The disease took a lot from you, I'm aware of that. I won't deny it and I will be patient. I can wait, Y/N. I will wait. But fuck, my love, you're alive. And as far as we know, you're healthy. Your body is different, it's true. But it doesn't change anything for me. To me you're perfect the way you are. You're perfect how you are. You may not believe me but I choose you, even when you're not an option. Because I love everything about you. I love these tiny wrinkles in the corner of your eyes. I love your stubbornness and your bad faith. I love the way you laugh, even if it's too loud, I love that you always want to have the last say. I love your old stained, patched jumper you refuse to throw away, I love that you keep making sure I took my meds, even though sometimes it pisses me off.  I love all your flaws, I love all your scars… As you love mine… And above all, Y/N, I love you for who you are, and not for how you look. I love you very, very much, more than my own life. And that's why I choose you. And I'll choose you, over and over again."

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