#and also the messages along the lines of 'i'm going through some shit right now but you made me smile on a shitty day'

[citrineghost]

I absolutely cannot get over - of all the things wrong with this season of OFMD - the abuse apologism.

Listen, hear me out, I understand that they're violent pirates. I understand they brutally murder and kill people and steal their shit and ruin lives. I get it.

The problem is, you cannot make a comedy about pirates and put a focus on the therapizing and emotional openness of the crew, making the fact that Stede showing up has them healing and talking and being emotionally more healthy as a major selling point of the show only to use that therapy-speak as a way of justifying abuse apologism.

They all hurt people, yes. The thing is, they're not supposed to hurt each other. They're supposed to be a family. The violence and abuse is supposed to be outside of the family network. They're supposed to be at home around each other, even if everyone there isn't great all the time and can sometimes be a bit toxic or unhealthy. Overall, in season 1, the message was, "We can get through this together." "Talk it through, as a crew."

Instead, season 2 dives directly into Ed committing atrocities against his own crew, giving most of them some combination of PTSD (which is clearly worse than any they've experienced before, because their personalities and ability to interact with people is completely altered), dissociation, hypervigilance, etc. Then, when they finally beat his ass and try to kill him because of the abuse, Stede fucking Bonnet shows up and is like, actually! I think you all should give him another chance!

The following episode(s) are so fucking hard to watch.

You've got people jumpy around him, terrified he's going to hurt them, all the while Stede encouraging them to just get over it and forgive him. He pushes for Ed to try to "turn poison into positivity." Basically encouraging the notion that if your abuser apologizes and then acts nice, everything should be fine and peachy.

The fact that this is bullshit is mentioned, I believe, only once, when someone noted that Edward didn't even use the words, "I'm sorry," during his apology.

This isn't just perpetuated by Stede, it's also perpetuated by Black Pete. He says to Lucius, "I feel like you're not even looking at me, you're looking through me." and then, when he sees that Lucius is drawing Ed's head on Pete's body (I guess meant to be some comedic take on traumatic fixation), he isn't sympathetic at all, he get's mad that he's not focused on him, and says something along the lines of, "You're so focused on the bad that happened to you but I haven't heard you mention once that you're alive."

This is such a heartwrenchingly common form of abuse minimization that it's nauseating to think about. This idea that, oh, you may be traumatized but actually you're not dead so who cares? Be grateful! Get over it!

And, unlike it being pointed out that Ed didn't say the words, "I'm sorry," this scene is never criticized by anyone in-show. Instead, Lucius appears very guilty and then draws a picture of Black Pete as an apology, telling him he's right.

He wasn't right. That's a fucked up thing to tell someone who was almost killed and then experienced extreme trauma following that. He made the entirety of Lucius' trauma an affront to him. Because Lucius was thinking about his trauma and not him.

Now the worst thing about all of this, to me, is that once this episode is past, it's treated as if everything is resolved. Oh haha funny, Ed walked around the ship with a cat bell on his neck for a few days so he couldn't sneak up on people! So cute and quirky!

It's fucking not! They should have thrown him onto a deserted beach and left him there. I'm not saying Ed should never be allowed to have anything good again in his life, I'm just saying it shouldn't be the crew he traumatized and abused. They don't deserve to have to live with him. They shouldn't be expected to forgive him.

Don't even talk to me about how they made a, and I quote, "Safe Space," and then Ed showed up to it. Like he had any fucking right to be there. When it was a Safe Space meant to be specifically an escape for the people he abused and traumatized. As if he, too, was a victim of him abusing them.

And on top of all of that, the fact that, as he's dying, Izzy is taking all the blame for Ed's actions as Blackbeard - another of Ed's abuse victims - and is treated as if that's the peak of his emotional development. It's not. That was where his development plummeted. He had seconds left to live and he used them to absolve his abuser of his guilt because he loves him and didn't want him to feel as bad when he died.

I was not a fan of Izzy in season 1. He was the biggest cunt on the ship, and he did encourage Ed to be a worse version of himself. But that doesn't mean his cuntiness justified him being mutilated and abused daily. We can only put so much of that on him. Ed had the power to say no. He had the power to be moderate, even. He had the power to be violent and terrible to people outside of their crew. He took Izzy's words and he ran with them - waaay further than he had any conscionable right to.

But this post isn't about season 2 Izzy. It's about abuse apologism, which I feel made up a significant portion of this season's content. And I'm just fucking furious about it.

I'm not saying shows can't have bad things in them. I'm not saying abuse apologism doesn't happen or that it doesn't have its place in media. I'm just saying, season 2 of this show wasn't a fucking comedy. The writers fucking tanked it. Everything that was good about season 1 was stripped of season 2 and everything was plunged into dark-humor tinted tragedy.

You can't base an entire show on the idea of comedically intelligent/modern therapizing language and then use that language to communicate that abusers deserve your pity and forgiveness - not to a queer audience that is probably 90% people who have been horribly abused.

#ofmd critical #ofmd #ofmd 2 #ofmd season 2 #ofmd2

[brodinsons]

"Instead of highlighting the character's Jewish origins, 'Man of Steel' features a Randian Christ-figure who commits genocide against his entire race, then causes multiple mass casualty events."

I apologize in advance for the incoming rant but I am sick and tired of sitting quietly for this relentless bullshit and at some point, enough is enough. I'm not naming the individual I'm quoting because I'm not interested in starting fights. This is my space and I'm venting a collective decade of frustration and anger.

Noun. Randian (plural Randians) A follower of Ayn Rand.

God damn, y'all just can't help yourselves, can you? You just slurp up every bit of nonsense from all those puffed up "YouTube Essayists" with god complexes from 2015 and take it as fucking fact.

Not to mention, y'all cannot seem to let a random baseless accusation from a disgraced sexual predator go. That's him! He's the one who started it! The very one to fling the first scrap of "Zack Snyder is a Randian Objectivist who hates Superman and is poisoning the DCEU!" bait out into the twittersphere for the rest of the ravenous bloggers to jump on. I refuse to take anyone's treatise on the modern superhero myth seriously if this is the depth they'll stoop to in the middle of their piece.

Snyder made one single offhand comment about maybe adapting 'The Fountainhead' (for its aesthetics, mostly) years ago and now he's a sexist racist fascist objectivist and the root of all evil.

Objectivism: "The exceptional people among us have a divine right to decide our fate and we should not oppose them."

Does that sound like the message of any of his DC films? Movies that end with speeches about heroes wanting to be on the ground to do good in crises and how good humanity can be despite its faults? What about MoS specifically, where the ultimate immigrant allegory struggles to find his place in a world that does not accept him yet still fights for and protects humanity because this world is his chosen home?

Not to mention, where the fuck is this genocide-committing Jesus Superman? Clark t-poses out of the Black Zero one goddamn time while looking sadly back at his dad because Snyder is a visual filmmaker with a penchant for dramatic shots and everyone loses their fucking minds. He goes to the Lutheran church he presumably attended with Martha & Jonathan as a child to seek the counsel of Father Leone because Clark Kent is not canonically Jewish (may the memory of his Jewish creators be a blessing). There's stained glass iconography of Christ in the background at one point because it's a Christian church in middle America. Clark himself never once espouses any religious lines or strict beliefs. Nor does he position himself as a "Christ-figure", either through himself or via the story??????? He doesn't want the responsibility that comes with putting that suit and cape on. But he does it anyway because he understands the stakes when shit gets real and he refuses to let his adoptive world pay for unwittingly bringing the worst remnants of his old world here.

Also, Clark only kills one person: Zod. The U.S. military "bombs" the Black Zero with the starcraft that brought Clark to earth in order to re-open the Phantom Zone and send Zod's forces (the pack of militaristic extremists known as the Sword of Rao) into it. Given what we know of the Phantom Zone in various canons, that's a fate almost worse than death. Then, after being given an ultimatum that either he dies or Zod will, he makes the impossible choice that will haunt him the rest of his life to save a human family moments from being obliterated by Zod's heat vision and kills the general. Nowhere in this catastrophic battle did he "commit genocide against his entire race" (did everyone forget that he himself is the Codex's host and therefore the living possibility of Krypton's rebirth?) or "cause multiple mass casualty events".

I understand that the scale of fictional damage was perhaps a touch more realistic than the near identical scale featured in all of the Avengers movies. It's fine if it's not your thing. Move along. That discomfort still doesn't give you enough leeway to point the finger at a rookie Superman on his first day on the job and say "all that destruction and death was his fault". He tried to take it out of the city! Zod—a vastly more experienced military leader with blind genetic fanaticism on his side, by contrast—refused to allow it. His goal was the annihilation of earth and as much collateral damage as possible (preferably the entire human race). Clark had to stand between humanity and that with zero combat experience and no clue he'd be forced into a no-win scenario to stop the carnage.

I'm tired. It has been ten years. I'm so fucking tired. Can you people give it a rest? None of you are the ultimate authority on superheroes and positioning yourselves as something dangerously close to that with these twitter threads and blog treatises and reviews full of big words in nerd outlets only poisons the fandom well further.

You are allowed to dislike things. You aren't even required to justify that dislike. What you aren't allowed to do is declare something objectively bad based on nothing but your own subjective reaction to it, then invent criticisms that aren't even applicable to the thing in question.

The day we lost the ability to differentiate between "I did not enjoy this media so I guess it wasn't for me" and "I did not enjoy this media and therefore NO ONE SHOULD BECAUSE REASONS I WILL INVENT FROM SECONDHAND HEARSAY" is the day media literacy ceased to exist in pop culture.

#snyderverse meta #extremely long and ''toxic'' rant #this literally does not matter because superheroes are fictional and do not matter #but this director and the world he created matters to me and i am sick and tired of being attacked from every angle for defending it #stop drinking the kool aid #zack snyder is not the boogeyman under your bed or waiting to jump out of your school locker #he is a fucking nerd who made some capeshit movies and everyone collectively lost their fucking minds about it #can we move on now?

[lilbittymonster]

Okay 6.55 thoughts in no particular order:

-Big Kittie Lady Wuk Lamat I Love You So Much

-Kitali does not like her enough to want to help with the politics though. She's done and over being used to further political goals of other people. The bit about not wanting to let the overly aggressive candidate win was intruiging but her line of thinking is "well, this is what the Alliance is supposed to be for, I'm not going to continue to be their one woman army anymore."

-WIFE SPOTTED IN LIMSA I REPEAT WIFE SPOTTED IN LIMSA LOMINSA DOCKS

-I am going to fucking shit myself laughing if Estinien winds up on the same boat/same dock as the Scions coming in completely by coincidence because he's continuing his retirement trip around the planet.

-I respect and love him so much for that btw like this man has likely never set foot much further outside of Coerthas than the North Shroud for the first 32 years of his life, he is going to see as much of the world as he can now.

-someone was complaining in Radz shout chat about how the relics weren't "an actual grind" and someone else shouted back that EW was the "waiting room expansion" like. Y'all did this to yourselves, you are aware of this, right? You complained and whined and pouted SO HARD about Eureka and Bozja that they said "okay, baby shoes this time" and now you think it's too easy? Come join us omnicrafters in the Splendour tool grind then. Cowards.

-I'm glad that only the Arkasodara quests are canon for Kitali bc wow that capstone questline felt like a "somehow Palpatine has retured" for me. Nonsense(derogatory) as opposed to Hildibrand nonsense(affectionate).

-Where is Hraesvelgr we saw Hraesvelgr in the trailer but he wasn't here? Maybe there's still more for the actual 7.0 release idk

-Also weird that G'raha was in Tural in the trailer but says he's staying behind with the Annex. I don't particularly mind or care but just something I thought was odd.

-Urianger and Thancred. That is all.

-"What are you two doing here?" Krile they fucking live in Sharlayan I don't know if you were aware of this or not.

-My fondness for Erenville continues to grow. I think he and Kitali get along very well. They both are so very Done(tm) with everyone.

-It was nice seeing Jullus on the Island sanctuary but that just blasted so many holes in a ficlet I had wanted to write and I was too busy being bitter about that to really enjoy the rest of the time there.

-"it must be nice being able to get away" yeah see you would THINK THAT but I keep having all these fucking tourists showing up on my beach asking to parade around the place. 'Private getaway' my ass. Kitali is packing a bag and moving to the east side of the island.

-the overall messages of "power of friendship and hope" and "everything comes to an end, we all experience loss" are really starting to sound like a broken record. For people like me who have basic media literacy and got the message the first idk half dozen times....this is unnecessary. I know that a good chunk of the userbase needs it spelled out for them in black and white but.....idk. And a lot of it is that it's trying to hit emotional buttons that I just don't have because I did not care that much about Endwalker as an expansion. EW was just the wolstinien agenda expansion lmao. I don't particularly care for the Omicron or the lopporit questlines which is where they really tried to jam pack it in and I just ended up button mashing my way through the stories.

-Who the FUCK was in charge of picking reaction expressions in all of those cutscenes? On top of "she would not be smiling like that at G'raha, it takes so much of her self control to not actively scowl at him", some of those were just so out of place. I know what each one was bc i live in gpose and the tonal dissonance on some of them were just........what.

-Monster hunter honeymoon expansion still a very strong possibility.

-those last few lines in the final cutscene.........Man. I hope we do get to go north and see what the fuck is under all those clouds on Ilsabard and Othard.

-final relic stage lance Pretty :3

-I need an entire sitcom of Wuk Lamat and Erenville as children that was SO TASTY.

-I am glad that they're getting rid of the Stormblood problem with making the contest of succession explicitly open to outsiders.

-I like the reference in the food book to potatoes and tomatoes being imported from Tural through Limsa, that was a nice touch.

-I will still likely not pick up blue mage by the time Dawntrail releases lmao. F for me for missing any potential extra dialogue.

Closing thought: Kittie

#ffxiv spoilers #endwalker spoilers #6.55 spoilers #patch 6.55 #patch 6.55 spoilers #most exciting part of the whole patch was Estinien showing up for five seconds tbh #and Urianger's poses

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 3461

today was quiet. i talked to leo early on but i was laughing so hard that meredith sent him a message "molly is laughing too hard. go to sleep." it was so funny omg

anyway it was pretty quiet. i like getting to hang out with meredith. she's delightful.

at the end of the day, i ended up staying for another hour and a half to sit and talk to and hang out with jey and leo because i don't get to see them much. it was a great decision. i got to see leo's cats, we all talked about a bunch of things, and i laughed a LOT and im very happy.

when i left, i drove down the road and ended up at a red light. my windows were down because it was nice out (to me), and the car next to me had music playing, so i was nodding and moving along to the music. and then the lady in the passenger seat of the other car says to me, "you can do the macarena to anything, it works! try it!" she was doing the macarena to a song that should not have the macarena done to it. i laughed because that was the LAST thing i expected to hear today 😂 so i said i would and i laughed down the road when the light turned green. and at the NEXT red light, i was a few cars back from the front of the line, and that SUV would be the first in that line, but they slowed down next to me and the lady was dancing more! it was SO FUNNY because she (1) stopped to say something, (2) said something, (3) danced while saying it, and (4) stopped AGAIN to show me that she was dancing! 😂😂😂😂😂😂

literally i laughed halfway down the bridge.

and joel's out for now, and i realize how often he comes home really late. i would like to cuddle with him one of these evenings.

a couple other things, but they're trauma-based.

tw religion, religious trauma, personal trauma, mental and emotional manipulation and abuse

tldr i remembered some ~church~ and "friend" shit that made me angry for my past self and my current self.

as i was driving in cambridge yesterday, i found the mormon church in the area. it's on the road i take to get back to the main thoroughfare to get back to the bridge to get back to the highway. it's right there. i could've lived without finding it. but today as i came up to it i cursed it out and all the people and establishments that fucked me over for so long. i thought about all of the mental gymnastics and hoops i had to jump through to stay and to believe it all.

and then as i was on the highway coming back home, i thought of another experience that i have zero qualms with talking about.

once upon a time, i had a friend at church named lisa. she was funny and smart and no-nonsense and was bisexual, so we understood the lgbt. she also had an account on here and freaked out when she learned that i was in charge of the account. it was nice.

for a while.

lisa and aaron and tyler, the three friends ("friends") i had in that group i had told before that when they hang out if they want to include me that i needed an explicit invitation. i told all of them that. they refused to respect it. but i ignored it.

i texted the group the most, i think. i always texted first. i ignored that, too.

and then one evening when the gathered young adults were playing a game for family home evening, the teams got into an argument and were shouting and yelling really loudly at each other. i didn't want to play but i got up, threw my hands in the air, and yelled as a response, "okay! i'll go next!" just to appease everyone. and i went into the hallway and proceeded to have a panic attack.

while i'm in the middle of breaking down, lisa and tyler and aaron come out to "check on me," which im sure was their intent, but it didn't come across that way.

lisa asked me what was wrong and i said i didn't know. she then said something to the effect of, "this is why we walk on eggshells around you, why we can't talk to you, because we don't know what will set you off since you won't tell us."

it was the meanest thing i can remember her saying to me.

(this was SEVERAL years ago.)

i was just beginning to work through my trauma, much of which stems from constant arguments and screaming matches between my parents throughout my entire childhood.

i didn't know that listening to people yell like that was going to set me off.

if someone is having a panic attack, you don't go up to them during it and say "we can't talk to you because you don't tell us your triggers."

how am i supposed to tell you what's going to set me off when even i don't know what's going to set me off??

it's not okay to blame someone for your actions because they don't know something. it's less okay to do that in the middle of a panic attack. it's even less okay to disguise it as care.

i left that night in tears. i felt terrible. i was exhausted from the attack. but that was the first time i started to think about the mental gymnastics i was doing. i didn't ignore it.

i realized that i always texted first. so i stopped texting first.

i didn't get any more texts.

i stopped offering to do things.

i stopped getting asked to do things, eventually.

and the three of them have been blocked since.

tyler came to visit once, which was nice of him. my only ire towards him is that he went along with lisa's narcissistic tendencies and didn't speak up when she was out of line. narcissistic tendencies don't look good on you.

aaron had been my friend for a long time. not anymore. he didn't stand up for me. he didn't reach out or call or text or try to contact any other way. too mormon for his own good. it's obnoxious. and he's a narcissist, too.

and lisa? i hope she stubs her toe and steps on a sliver of glass. that someone she loves and trusts does something so incomprehensibly unfair and unkind that she knows and feels what it's like to lose an entire group of friends. you don't fucking blame someone for not knowing triggers when they just fucking find out about them. for someone who was getting a phd in criminal justice, you really lacked the empathy and understanding to be a good friend. you fucked that up and you treated me so terribly. and for what? because you and the other two stooges who also were narcissists needed someone to take advantage of?

fuck you.

get fucking bent.

#i'm angry #tw religion #tw religious trauma #molly rambles #operation srr #osrr #3000s #3400s #sunshine boy

[carlatsukinamistolemyhamsandwich]

Out of all the (so like the Sakamakis, Mukamis, Tsukinamis, and Kino) guys in Diabolik Lovers, who would you say is the LEAST abusive towards Yui or the mosts kind towards Yui? I would say Shin but maybe I'm just biased LOL since he's my favorite character.

Eh... this is one of those questions where there really isn't a good answer.

I was going to say it's definitely not Shin but then I remembered all of the other stuff some of the other characters do and was like hmmm...

What I will say is that Shin probably isn't the worst offender in his own DF route, he's still definitely not nice but some of the HDB routes are worse in my eyes, however if we look at DF in a wider context then err... It's pretty damning for him. In Carla's Manservant ending, he murders Yui and Carla, and that's without going into what he does in Ruki's DF route. In fact if we look at all routes, I’d actually say Kino comes off as better than Shin in terms of behaviour towards Yui in other characters’ routes (even if he does put the other diaboys through a lot).

I think if I had to pick the kindest DL character across all routes, I'd have to go with Azusa with maybe Subaru coming second. Across the routes I've played (please bare in mind I have not played every route), Azusa is the character who most consistently helps Yui in routes that aren't his own. That being said I haven't played Azusa's More Blood route so I can’t say how he fares in his original route. I’m also not especially good on Subaru’s HDB or MB routes (because I read summaries of them about 6 years ago and haven’t revisited them since), but he’s pretty decent in his DF and LE routes, so certainly as far as the later games go, he’s definitely a contender (and he’s usually pretty good in other characters’ routes too).

At the end of the day, the problem with trying to answer something like this that to some degree it’s subjective. 

Like for example, Shuu’s route is often touted as one of the most tame HBD routes, while generally Laito’s is viewed as the worst (at least so far as I’ve seen), however for me personally, nothing in Laito’s route made me feel as uncomfortable as the scene in Shuu’s route just before he and Yui have their first time together. I’m not saying that what Laito does to Yui in his route isn’t awful, because it is, but I definitely found something about that scene with Shuu far more insidious, I think because it was a lot more subtle than any of the shit Laito pulls (honestly it’s been a while since I played it but I definitely remember feeling pretty uneasy).

I personally would not say Shin is necessarily the kindest, and this is as someone who adores him, but I can definitely see why he might seem that way, particularly if you’re looking at him through the favouritism lens.

For one, while Shin does have the unfortunate trait of tending to underestimate his opponents in a physical fight, personality-wise, I’d actually argue that he’s one of the most self-aware of the boys. If you look at his messages in the popularity polls, they’re often something along the lines of “You’re choosing me even after such terrible things were done to you? What an idiot.” or “You know what you’re letting yourself in for by choosing me right?” (these are not the exact quotes but it’s something similar) and in his Para-Selene CD, he even straight up says something like “you understand by now don’t you, that I’m by no means kind”.

Shin is fully aware that he’s a bit rough around the edges personality wise, and I think the fact he at least recognises this (and pretty much right off the bat too) makes him seem less awful than some of the other guys. Additionally, if you look at his behaviour in DF, he honestly doesn’t really change that much once he forms an attachment to Yui, he still pranks and teases her, it just has less of a bite to it, so there’s much less of a stark difference between before and after versus characters like Reiji or Kou.

Anyway if we’re not careful I’m just going to start writing an essay on Shin (again) so I’ll leave it here for now.

TL;DR  I personally would say Azusa or Subaru are probably kindest to Yui overall, and although I won’t say he’s kind, I would definitely say Kino’s LE route is pretty watered down compared to the other’s introductory routes, so I’d actually put him up as a contender for least abusive too.

I hope that answers your question and that you have a good day anon!

#ask #you guys are 100% free to disagree with me on this this is just my opinion #and please remember that it's been a long time since I reviewed some of these routes #my Tsukinami knowledge is a lot better than my general DL knowledge

[flowersforvax]

can we ask about your metal journey? as a light dabbler in metal i'm curious as to your favorites so far! artists and sub genres are so varied, it's kind of hard to guess

I was so excited to talk about my journey discovering heavy metal this got longer than i expected (and also I kind of misunderstood your message at first which is why I didn't just... list some bands i like whoops) so this is going behind a read more 💀

Okay so. We're gonna get the embarrassing part out of the way first and i'm gonna admit that I started listening to Metal because Stranger Things fanfiction kept name dropping bands and songs that I just had no reference for.

So! the intro for me! was Dio! because that's the big name on the back of Eddie Munson's battle vest! Still with me? Great! (You wanna know which song I listened to first??? It was Rainbow in the Dark. because I'm a predictable little fruit lmao. great song though)

I did absolutely fall in love with Ronnie James Dio's voice and also the way every youtube comment section in relation to him has someone mentioning what a great guy he was within the first ten comments (like. "We had a conversation on the street after the concert and when we met again five years later he remembered our names"-great. wtf?? How was that guy real??)

Just shooting from the hip some of my favorites of Dio (and bands RJD was part of) include Holy Diver, Heaven & Hell, Straight Through The Heart, Stargazer, Children of The Sea, The Last In Line, Don't talk to Strangers, Neon Nights Gates of Babylon, Die Young, [...]

And then I was like, well I can't listen to just Dio, right?? But I was also kind of frozen because there is SO MUCH metal out there! So I did the basic bitch thing and listened to the spotify Metal Essentials playlist which had me go "...Judas Priest? Why does that sound familiar...?" And it was, of course, because at some point I'd seen a tumblr post mentioning Rob Halford coming out in the 90s and how it was ridiculous that anyone could have listened to "Grinder" in 1980 and thought that song was in any way heterosexual. So, like the predictable little fruit that I am, I decided to work my way through Judas Priest and i'm not... close to done (it's almost like bands who started making music in the seventies and are still making music today have made a lot of music...! I'm not overwhelmed or anything!)

The Hellion/Electric Eye is a religious experience to me. No song about a totalitarian surveillance state should be allowed to fuck that hard. And YET-!

Sidenote: It's fascinating how exposing myself to Heavy Metal has changed my perception... of Heavy Metal. Like. The reason I never listened to it was because I had a very specific idea of what Metal music sounds like (which is! ridiculous! now that I know the amount of sub genres included in Metal!) but I won't lie: there's still a shit ton of metal that just sounds straight up grating to me. But! there are also songs that I love now (Painkiller by Judas Priest comes to mind) that I did not enjoy at all at first, so who knows? Maybe in another three months I'll listen to Napalm Death, even though right now I don't feel like Grindcore and I will ever get along like that.

At some point then I watched some youtube videos of Elizabeth at The Charismatic Voice reacting to Heavy Metal. I genuinely don't remember why I started doing this but I found her delightful and it was fun to watch someone else be completely new to Metal.

And still! There's a lot of metal I just don't really... get. Which I noticed when I tried listening to the official Wacken 2022 playlist to blast myself with as many bands as possible that are popular right now (to take a break from what I was doing before, imprinting on three heavy metal bands from the 80s and making them my comfort zone lol). But as i said, a lot of it still just sounds like... noise to me. But I want to get it, you know? I feel like I'm so close to getting it. So when that didn't work out I did the basic bitch thing again and searched shit like "intro to heavy metal" and "new metalhead guide" on YouTube until I landed on BangerTV's "How to get into Heavy Metal" series which I like a lot. He explains the differences in subgenres (SO MANY SUBGENRES) and gives examples of that genre that are easy to get into for people new to metal. The videos are, hilariously, directed at people who already listen to Metal who want to get other people into it, but that didn't really make a difference to me. He also once mentioned an artist as "the guy we don't talk about because of the racism" (paraphrased) which is nice. Always good to see you landed on the right page lol

And that's- that's where i'm at in my metal journey right now. I watched one of the BangerTV videos which made me want to check out Atmospheric Black Metal (verdict: weirdly? Relaxing?) and here we are. You, me and this metal playlist i started adding to whenever i really liked a song. It feels basically empty so far but it's also... somehow four hours long:

If you find anything new on there you like or if you have a recommendation, I'd love to hear it! 🤩

#this got. long. sorry about that #also kind of disjointed it feels like? #tldr i made a heavy metal playlist #my metal journey #flowers talks music #flowers talks #ask and you shall receive (a reply) #anon

[cagedchoices]

Hiiii I'm really sorry to bother you but I noticed on your old blog you used to have a rule that said not to treat your character like Jesse Pinkman. I think I get why its a concern but I'm wondering why it doesn't say that anymore and also I'm curious to know about what you think the differences between Caleb and Jesse are

omg ok first of all bb, you are certainly not bothering me by asking questions. i appreciate being asked thank you 🥰

secondly uh, i removed that disclaimer from my rules bc i felt like i didn't really need it anymore. it does still apply but i really only had it up bc when i was still fairly new to writing caleb i would get a lot of anons making br.ba jokes. so naturally there would be a lot of people pretending to be fuckin walter white in my inbox trying to tell caleb "let's cook" and like "jesse stop screwing around with robots and get back to work" and shit and like. yeah it's a fun little joke. ONCE. 😬

when you're seeing it multiple times a day/week it loses charm real quick. so i decided to be kinda petty about it and be like 'y'all know that caleb is NOT jesse right?' and i did two things. i flat out stopped responding to br.ba anons and i added that warning to my rules. and it seemed like it worked! i stopped getting flooded and my inbox was allowed to know peace again. but like i said, i don't think i really need it anymore because it should just be kind of a given, right? i mean i'm sure this has happened to other people before and will continue to happen bc that's the internet and unfortunately some people have no concept of boundaries and others just struggle with understanding that they might be making someone uncomfortable without intending to.

but like. to think of a popular example which i'm sure has happened before and will surely happen in the future i just think of a mun who writes joel from the last of us and maybe they like using pedro pascal's portrayal and they enjoy using him as an fc. now imagine that rper getting an inbox filled with anon messages treating joel as totally indistinguishable from the mandalorian. telling him he's gotta go find grogu or asking him why he abandoned his son for ellie or something along those lines. there are some GLARING differences between joel miller and din djarin. they're clearly not the same character.

so it might be funny to the person sending the messages and they're probably just having fun like. i'm sure they don't mean anything bad by it. but lemme tell ya, it's not as much fun to the mun on the receiving end. and in my case it sent me into a lil bit of a writer crisis like 'oh fuck is caleb nichols just a carbon copy of jesse pinkman is that how other people i write with see him?? what can i do to make him stand apart and be different without pulling him away from westworld canon too much??'

so anyway that's the rant over with. to answer the second half of this, caleb and jesse are different people. they just are. they do have a lot in common ranging from appearance to basic personality traits to the way they use body language, but they aren't completely the same. they come from different backgrounds which were influenced by various different factors.

jesse is more creative, he's an artist at heart and he has an artist's mindset and that's a kind of freedom to him. he expresses himself mainly through aesthetics. he draws, he wears a colorful wardrobe that really makes him stand out, the first time walter tells him that cooking crystal is chemistry jesse argues back that it is art and he has his signature style and he resents that walt forces him to change it. the reason jesse got involved in the drug trade is predominantly because it's the one place he is allowed and encouraged to express himself freely through art.

caleb on the other hand, is a soldier and he has a soldier's mindset toward most things. he is/was for the most part content with being told what to do next, following orders, sticking to a game plan. he expresses himself mainly through acts of service in canon, particularly to family as we see with his mom in the hospital and when he leaves his wife and daughter behind to go try and put a stop to the war that's coming. he wants to help, he wants to keep everyone safe and the only way he really knows how to do that is to fight.

i'd also say that while jesse and caleb are both highly empathetic and sensitive to the feelings of others, caleb is more stoic about it. i'm not totally sure if that's just how he is naturally or if he's so wracked and troubled by traumatic experiences and was trained to swallow those emotions in the military or otherwise learned to shut down but like. where jesse is always emoting something and never just sitting completely still and blank, caleb seems more comfortable with staying quiet and not always necessarily showing what's on his mind at a given moment.

and there are or course many more things i can say about specific differences but i feel like i've made this post long enough and gone on a scattered tangent so like. i might explore it way more in depth at a later date. ❤️

#anonymous #big data compiles information on everybody — meta. #i guess??

[0nlinejournal]

04/07/2023 2:04pm

I love doing absolutely nothing on my days off. I used to feel so much guilt/shame around not doing anything, but now I am so grateful to be able to have days like this. I should probably shower, though.

I went over to Alex and Liz's apartment for a couple hours last night. Watched them take turns playing Little Nightmares 2. It was a fine visit, glad I was able to make it out. I didn't particularly enjoy Alex screaming at the top of her lungs right next to me, but nothing I could do except gently remind her she has fucking neighbors.

I always have to park in visitor parking when I go over there and wait for one of them to open the gate (like the whole ass car gate). I called and texted but Alex's phone was face down on the coffee table. I didn't text Liz because Alex has gotten upset in the past that I only talk to Liz, so I was trying to include Alex through small actions. Anyway, two gals left through the gate after only about a minute of me standing there, so I slipped in while they slipped out. But, when I left, so on my way out, I also texted Alex to let me out. I stood there for like two minutes (and it was cold) before she finally texted me that there's a foot door on the side of her building to get out. Which meant I would have to backtrack, go through the gate, and then walk to, and past where I was already standing. I'm not gonna lie I was a little salty about it. Ultimately it's whatever, but jeeeeez alriiiiiight. Liz texted me when I was pulling out asking if I made it to my car alright. I said yes but it was cold I didn't like that, and she said I should've texted her she would've let me out. And I know I should've. I wanted to, but I was still trying to make Alex feel more involved and special and it was all for nothing whatever.

Such a minor event, but still. It's stuff like this that seems to build up when it comes to Alex. Things have to go how she wants them to go and also fuck other people's feelings. I don't know if that last bit is true at all, I'm just a little pissy from last night and the previous text message conversation I had with her. Which, I still didn't get to talk to her about. I honestly don't know how to bring it up? Like, "hey you can't say shit like this to me even when you're upset". I don't feel like I can tell her how to behave. I mean, I know if I think about it for more than two seconds I know I wouldn't phrase it that way, but it still feels like it could come off that way.

"I want to be there for you when you're upset, but I am not capable of doing that if you start to get accusatory or try to guilt trip me. There are certain phrases that you have said in the past (insert: but like fuck alex right? that's fine, i just don't have any friends. i just want to hang out with my friend's for once) that are not accurate and overdramatize reality that I feel are intended to make me feel terrible. I don't react well when people intentionally try to guilt trip me, because of my mother. It will have the opposite affect that you want." blah blah blah something along those lines, I'm still kind off irritable so there still might be some aggression in between the lines, idk. I'll work on it.

You know, I was talking about the trivia night texts with Seb and he stopped me early on into me relaying the conversation to him to say that she (Alex) for some reason is putting her not-being-able-to-go onto me. That she is putting this restriction on herself (she doesn't want to hang out with my bf anymore) but putting her deciding to miss out on things on me because I said yes to something we were invited to. And like, yeah, she is! I think she 100% is and that's why she said the things she said. I don't think she even realizes that that isn't an okay thing to do. Ah, that's something else I'll have to add into the conversation I want to have with her.

"This is a restriction you have chosen to put on yourself (mind you, she won't go to things at all if we'll be there, even when she wouldn't have to interact with my bf at all) and it is not my responsibility to bare the weight you feel from the consequences of that decision." Something like that.

God, I am so tired of thinking about this. I literally don't ever think about people this much when I'm alone. I like to fuck off and do my own shit, but this whole ordeal has really consumed my brain and I feel like a fucking crazy person. At least it's not a constant thing, but it is still far more prevalent than I'd like for it to be. I didn't even mean to write this much. I'd love to talk about literally anything fucking else, but I guess I don't have much else to say since this is all I could manage for today.

2:57pm

#online journal #tumblr journal #daily entry #april #2023 #april 07 2023

[ilovemusicmore]

Women, man.

This girl that I worked with had a bf, and they got engaged shortly after I started working with and talking to her. She told me she wanted friends, cause she didn't hang out with many people outside of her bf and his friends. So I was like cool, I need friends around my age instead of way older like usual. I even painted her and another coworker things to practice painting and as presents for christmas/in general cause, new friends! But I think she mistook my intentions.. which is also 100% normal and usually what happens. So we hadn't really talked since like, March. I also had a lot of other shit going on for myself, and I recently got fired from that job (because of discrimination, I still haven't decided how far I'm going to go legally with it but I've got unemployment about to start and a last check coming.

HOWEVER. Right after being fired, and before she knew about it, this same girl at work randomly sent me a link for her brand new OF account. On said account she lists herself as bi and only mentions being an introvert sharing her freaky side. After not speaking to each other since March. She then unsolicited called me baby girl outta no where, and I haven't corrected her with the pronoun thing yet cause I'm still too confused about wtf she's got going on. She then sent me 4 voice messages over Instagram first thing in the morning the next morning. And invited me out to a gay club with her and some other gays that all work where we used to work together. All very clear signs and indications of something, right??? And then..

Then I asked her "so what's the deal with the OF? I thought you might very gotten hacked" and her reply was along the lines of "I love sex and wanted to share that with people in my life so they could enjoy me too"

"Oh, and there will be some girl on girl action soon too so stay tuned"... 👀👀👀 OK ma'am, go off.

And then my reply, obviously, after this barrage of unsolicited everything, went along the lines of "we stab, fully support a small business. I would offer to help with volunteers but I doubt you'd need help in that department"

....lame. i know. So sue me....to which she replied... absolutely nothing. Has left me on read since Wednesday. Maybe it's because I wasn't as forward as she was being? But literally the last I heard she was engaged and had found her forever person and just wanted more friends to hang out with. But then never hung out with me when I tried and then stopped talking altogether until she sent me an OF sooooooo wtf. Why tf. Why do women. Why am I like this.

Either way all I've been able to think about since is all the different ways I wanna make her come and now I can't believe I have to wait until the day they wanna go out to hang out with her and figure it the fuck out. But, I gotta wait till I get my last check before I can do anything else about it anyway. Atm I have half a tank of gas and $25 for food till whenever that gets issued. And florida only requires them to send it out within 30 days of termination so they could technically wait till after the date everyone wants to go out before they issue it. I could get 1 or 2 unemployment checks before I get my actual final check

But anyway. Now idk if I've ruined it before it could start or if she's waiting for me to reciprocate some of the forwardness, idk if I should dig in harder and figure out something else to say or if I should leave it alone and give it some air before hanging out in person. What I really wanna do is be honest and let her know how much she's driving me crazy with everything and figure out if it's the intent or if I'm misreading things but how exactly do you misread that? Why send me the link at all if you don't either wanna think about me joining or something? We hadn't spoken in months. Idk. Maybe she thought I'd find out through work and feel left out? Why would that matter tho?

WHY AM I LIKE THIS

#just shoot me please #blonde hair blue eyes a british accent and she loves cars #pleeeeease put me outta my misery #my day dreams are getting too good and i know thats never obtainable so i gotta stop #wheres my lobotomy #i ordered one after the first girl that broke my heart and it STILL hasnt shown up #i just #am really bored atm and at least have someone/something to fantasize about now #i wish people were easier to figure out without getting screwed by them first. #but like... also... if youre tryna... #just going to have to make clear comunication a requirment for anytjing cause im done for a fling if she wants but #id really like a chance to get to know her and make her happy too #idk. we'll see #fucking #t minus three weeks to hang out unless i get a check sooner and can try and do something with her

[the-witches-you-couldnt-burn]

It started with a whisper

I originally wrote ‘Like I did with you’ as a one-shot but people wanted a sequel. This turned out to be waaaaay longer than expected (4.7k word count). Inspired by Everybody Talks by Neon Trees. I hope you lot enjoy!

Ao3

(Also this is Mari’s new outfit, all credits go to the original artist)

————

Two teens stood upon the balcony of a large banquet hall, exposed to the midsummer night air. The sky was a lilac blanket that hung over the Parisian buildings, speckled with glowing stars. The moon, with it’s crescent smile, beamed down of the young couple.

Hey, baby, won't you look my way?

Marinette’s eyes were closed as she rested her head upon his shoulder, relaxing after the night’s rapid escalation. Tonight she had arrived at the ball with the intent to be there for her friends, but somehow she found herself within the arms of Gotham’s (and probably Paris’) Ice Prince. She had overheard his nickname from the Gotham students, one of which being Jon, who was in the middle of mocking the young Wayne. She had never considered that nickname as suitable; sure he was temperamental & had a tendency to snap, but icey to the core? No.

I can be your new addiction

Damian was calm. For the first time in his life he felt like he could take a breath. His exhale was carried off by a small gust of wind, the bush over hanging the stone railing rustled. With his inhale, the scent of Marinette’s perfume became present once more. Mixed with the crisp night’s air, her usual scent of pastries was mixed with what could only be described as ambrosia. His phone vibrated within his pocket, it was never on volume due to the potential risk it caused during his heroic activities.

“Shit.” Notifications covered his screen, multiple tweets, Instagrams and Tiktoks in which he had been tagged in. But the alert came from his family’s private messaging chat. The whole thread was a shit storm, Grayson and Todd’s messages were completely capitalised (he learnt years ago this meant ‘to yell’ in writing form) and both had multiple ‘keyboard spasms’. Drake, like the thorough detective he is, had combed through the images and videos, investigating their validity. His honorary sisters had replied with ‘awwwww’(s) and ‘Omg we MUST meet this girl! I need to know how she tamed the demon!’. He could practically hear Brown’s shrill voice from across the ocean.

Hey, baby, what you gotta say?

No reply from his father or Alfred. The two of them were the only semblance of ‘normal’ paternal figures he had within his life, after the sham of a relationship he had previously held with his grandfather. Their silence unnerved him.

Marinette had noticed his attention had shifted to his phone, her own mobile was buzzing away within her baby pink purse. Messages, notifications of account tagging and comments galore. A sigh left her lips when she saw her parents seemed to be none the wiser. Good, she didn’t need to deal with future adoration for ‘The boy who swept our daughter off of her feet’ (or something along those lines).

Her cheeks regained some of the warmth they held before as she thought of her parent’s reaction. Scrolling through her Twitter she saw her friends had posted multiple images of the night’s events, majority being her shared dance.

Chloé Bourgeois @TheBestBourgeois

what kind of Disney shit is this? (Insert video of two teens dancing around an mostly empty dance floor.)

Alix Kubdel @Sk8trGirl

Replying to @TheBestBourgeois

I KNOW RIGHT?! THEY WERE FUCKING FLOATING!!!

All you're giving me is fiction

She was thankful that they hadn’t tagged her but she hadn’t been spared by others in attendance. Her post thread had blown up, thousands had commented and even more had viewed the evidence. There was no way she would come out of this unscathed.

“Has anyone been on Twitter today?” The blonde of the family asked as she walked into the dining room. Her eyes focused on her scrolling screen, brows furrowed in confusion. “Actually has anyone seen what’s happening on any of our socials?”

It was early in the afternoon and the family had recently returned home after a straining stakeout. The Joker had broken out of Arkham and the Batfam had to deal with his minions. Dick’s arm was in a sling (sprained from a grapple gone wrong), Jason was icing his hand, Alfred was stitching Bruce’s chest wounds while Tim and the girls escaped without severe injuries. All were still recuperating and finally able to recharge.

Alfred always enforced a strict ‘no devices at the dinner table’ rule; no matter how urgent it was, it could wait until after sustenance was consumed. Tim strongly opposed this, but there was no arguing with Agent A. This all surmises that probably no one had seen the crap storm on social media.

I'm a sorry sucker and this happens all the time

Bruce sighed, bringing his free arm up to rub his eyes. Tilting his head back to look at Steph, “Who was it this time?” Barbara quickly took out her phone to see what Stephanie was talking about, all the while glancing accusingly at Dick and Jason. Both of whom held up their arms (or in Dick’s case arm), declaring their innocence.

“It wasn’t fucking me!”

“Jason! Language!” Dick shot a glare at Jason and was met with one in return. “It wasn’t me either.”

“Then who-“ Bruce started before being cut off by his most rambunctious daughter.

I found out that everybody talks

Stephanie with a squeal, exclaimed that it was Damian. Visions of what the Wayne brat could have done flashed through the heads of everyone in the room. He had been sent overseas before the quarantines and lockdowns hit. During Damian’s first month in France he had been forced into online schooling and then finally when he got to go to in-person classes he hated it. Described the class as a kindergarten with petty and vindictive toddlers.

Had he broken someone’s arm? Was that person of such importance that it had spread over multiple social media platforms? France’s government had announced on June 15th, that teens were now being inoculated so him having COVID-19 was doubtful. Had he insulted the wrong person? Had he taken over the government? He certainly had the potential.

Everybody talks, everybody talks

What they saw stunned them, even Steph as she watched it for the 7th time. Damian Wayne was dancing. But not only that, he was dancing with a girl.

It started with a whisper

“What is this shit?”

No one verbally objected to Jason’s outburst but he was sent a harsh glare from Alfred, Dick and Bruce. Their focus soon returned to the images and videos before them. Babs’ and Steph’s phones were returned to them as the others ran to grab their own devices. They all met back at the table, comparing the posts and comparing their notes.

I can hear the chitchat

“There’s no way this can be real.”

“Jesus Tim,” Barbara rolls her eyes, “have you seen the amount of posts there are? You’d be an idiot to think otherwise.”

Take me to your love shack

“I’m with Tim, how do we know this isn’t some skit. I mean, Demon Spawn almost looks normal. That’s a matter of concern.” He almost dry heaved when he agreed with Tim. Damian couldn’t be capable of naturally exuding that amount of humanity unless there was something in it for him.

Mamas always gotta backtrack

“I was just saying Babs, that we should check the credibility of these images. For all we know they could be gorilla glued together and trying to get unstuck.” Tim cringed at his own reasoning, he really needed to either sleep (probably not going to happen anytime soon) or find his favourite coffee brand (which had been one of the first to vanish after the covid hoarders appeared).

When everybody talks back

Dick was too busy freaking out and spam messaging the youngest Wayne, to defend Damian’s humanity. The family saw this and followed suit, wanting to get information from the source.

Chat name: Alfred supremacy

BigBird: AHHHHHH DAMIAN!

BigBird: YOU LOOK SO CUTE!!!

BigBird: HAIFJDNDNFI

LittleWing: WTF HAPPENED DEMON SPAWN YOU LOOK ALMOST HUMAN

Babs: who knew the city of love would influence the brat

Blondie: they are so cuteeeeeee!

Blondie: We HAVE to meet her!

Silent-but-deadly: agreed.

Timbo: YO DEMON

Timbo: Apparently the videos are legit

Timbo: are you being blackmailed?

And it just devolved into more chaos from there, fueled by the fact that they saw Damian’s ‘Blood Son’ account appear online before vanishing once more. Dick shrieked, “I FOUND HER ACCOUNT!”

The family gathered around the eldest son, peering over his shoulder to view his iPhone 12max screen. They saw a young girl’s Instagram account. It was locked but they could see her profile pic, the girl had black hair and looked to be if Asian decent. They compared it to the videos but it was hard to see due to the hall’s lighting and the minimised facial features of the pfp. Alfred suggested that they search up her username and see who has tagged her, some might have other photos of her.

After research for awhile, the family began to get frustrated with lack of results.

Hey honey you could be my drug

You could be my new prescription

“Come on!” Jason complained, “What kind of teenage girl doesn’t post her life online?” He ignored the girls glares and went back to researching. How had the account by the name of ‘mariiiiinette’ to managed to prevent the entire Wayne clan from accessing it? Damn Instagram privacy settings. He groaned, dragging a hand down his face, “We are fucking stupid. Why don’t we just use the Bat-computer? It would be so much fucking easier.”

“It shouldn’t be used for civilian issues-“

Too much could be an overdose

“The girl could be a meta for all we know! We aren’t safe until we know who she is.” Jason points a finger at Tim, his paranoia flared up and even though he would never admit it, Jason would do anything to protect each member of his family (although Bruce is still debatable).

All this trash talk make me itching

Barbara and Tim took their usual positions as Oracle and Red Robin (who had been banned from patrol due to lack of sleep). The rest of the Batfam stood behind them either with arms crossed or still failing at researching.

Oh my my shit

“The account is owned by a girl called Marinette Dupian-Cheng. She is French-Chinese and her parents own a popular bakery. Also if it wasn’t already obvious, she goes to Collège Françoise Dupont, aka Damian’s French school.” Tim begun informing his nosy family, “But this account has been inactive for the past 6 months, which is strange due to her frequent posting schedule before hand. It seems she probably has a second account and this is her old one.”

Everybody talks, everybody talks

“Not only that,” Barbara interrupted. “There are unopened messages from other accounts that accuse her of being a bully. There is a whole Facebook page about this girl and how she has been hurting her old friends, but neither side seems reliable. The so called victims seem to be twisting the truth but there is barely any information about Marinette so we can’t disprove it either.”

“Read out some of the messages.” Bruce took a cup of coffee from Alfred and sipped it.

The main screen of the bat computer displayed a Facebook group with the banner picture being a photo of Marinette. “They are mostly complaints expected of teen girls when there is a girl they don’t like; ‘Marinette is such a know-it-all’, ‘She is constantly insulting Lila’s intelligence’. They go on to talk about how Marinette was briefly expelled from the Collège before being reinstated by the principle for a reason unknown to them.”

Everybody talks too much

“Her school reports up until this year were good. The newest one states, ‘While Marinette is a wonderful and bright student, I encourage her to settle her disagreements outside of class. This seems to only be a recent occurrence and I implore her to go to the guidance council if she is in need of help.’” A beat of silence echoes through the cave, Tim sighed. “Jason’s meta theory could be correct. She could have just recently started exhibiting her abilities and using them to get what she wants.”

“Bruce what do you want to do?”

“We’re going to Paris.”

She opened her eyes to the blaring morning light that streamed through the blinds. Her lashes still painted with mascara that refused to leave. She felt a pang of sorrow when she was removing her makeup and dress last night, she never wanted the night to end. She shuffled down the stairs to the kitchen, covering her mouth when she yawned. She greeted her mother as she entered the kitchen to get breakfast.

She glanced at her phone and there was the chaos that was started hours ago and it was still occurring. It was the weekend, she wouldn’t need to deal with her classmates until Monday. But she would still have to survive her parent’s interrogation. Out of the corner of her eye she caught her mother smirking at her.

Everybody talks

“Nadja told me some interesting news about last night.” Marinette held her breath, glaring at the toaster, willing it to hurry up so she could escape. “Well,” Sabine patted her shoulder before rubbing Mari’s back. “I know you didn’t want to go but I hope you had fun.”

With that she exited the kitchen, probably going to help her father in the bakery. The ravenette stared after her, eye widened in shock, jumping when the toaster went off. Buttering her toast she went over the conversation, her brows furrowed in confusion. She had expected a ‘When do I get to meet the oh so famous prince?’ or ‘Should I be expecting a new guest sometime in the near future?’ or at least a ‘Who was that young man, Bǎozàng (宝藏 it means treasure)?’ But she said nothing.

A small smile was plastered upon her face as she changed and went down to help her parents in the bakery. Her father didn’t say anything either, he gave her a knowing smile before continuing to kneed the dough. She sat at the the store front as the cashier whilst her parents were busy making ‘Paris’s Finest Pastries’.

Her musings slowly faded as she was brought back to reality by badly hushed whispers. Two young preteens were by the bread roll casing near the door. She had seen them come in before with their parents, the girls went to the prestigious international school over in the 16th arrondissement. The one with purple hair kept whispering to the brunette, both ‘subtly’ glancing towards her. Using her enhanced hearing she listened in on their conversation.

“That’s her, I swear that’s her in the video.”

The blonde’s face soured likes she sucked on a lemon. “No, it wasn’t good lighting there is no way he would dance with someone like her.”

Everybody talks

Marinette had tough skin but their words had an impact, only a small one due to her defence mechanism of repressing emotions. She stopped listening and went back to drawing in her sketchpad, she was in desperate need of a new school outfit.

The two girls eventually came up to the counter, goods in hand. Marinette rung up and bagged their items (paper because save the turtles sksksk) in a tired daze. A phone was shoved into her face, her eyes barely adjusted to view the screen before the blonde spoke.

“Is this your instagram?” She asked in a tone so snobbish that it should be illegal from a person her age. Marinette finally was able to view the screen that was barely an inch from her face. Her old Instagram ‘mariiiiinette’ was displayed on screen, she hesitantly nodded, gaze flicking back to the two in front of her.

The blonde’s nose scrunched up and the purple goth girl squealed in delight. They soon after left the store, their conversation had devolved into ‘See! I told you’ and ‘Yeah, yeah. You were right.’

Walking to school on Monday, she had finally come down from cloud nine. She still rode the tail end of her high as she rushed along her path to her campus, she wasn’t going to be late but she sure wasn’t going to be early. She had spent the better part of the weekend designing and sewing a brand new outfit. Her new look was composed of a black cropped singlet (L'amour gagne hemmed into it and it’s straps), paired matching peach plaid cropped overshirt and a-line miniskirt. Her hair was down, ballet flats were worn and her makeup was the usual with the added edition of a rose gold eyeshadow.

Even though her face was covered in a black and gold mask, she looked hot.

She reached the campus and the whispers started again, people were still buzzing from Friday night. Her classmates, the majority of her grade and the younger years seemed to gossiping before class about the formal’s events. She couldn’t spot any of her friends or the two Gotham transfers, so she was stuck listening the the chitchat. Why couldn’t she have been late like usual?

Damian had a fowl disposition and it showed in multiple icey glares (and that was before he even reached the collège). His family had made their appearance known in Paris at 1am Sunday morning. He could have used his dorm to escape but his family didn’t have the word ‘privacy’ within their vocabulary. He didn’t want to have to pay for a lock replacement due to his brothers’ (most likely Todd with Drake & Grayson laughing at him) lock picking habit.

The Ice Prince was back with full force. He had just been... influenced by all the other couples. Yes he did respect Dupain-Cheng and he appreciated her company & pleasant conversations. He would struggle to hide a small smile at the memory of the dance, even if he denied himself the happiness of normality, he felt content when reminiscing.

“Ooo the Ice Prince is here, did he have a fight with his princess or something?” The voice seemed to mock him.

“The Disney Magic is gone. The demon is back.”

Everybody talks

At the second jeer he shot a glare at the perpetrator. Jon held his hands up in an ‘I surrender manner’, laughing as he joined Damian at his side. The two entered the school’s large foyer and looked to see if any of the classes were open yet. Sadly they weren’t, before he was wrong and the his class was plain torture but this was truely hell.

He saw Dupain-Cheng sitting alone on the stairs, drawing within her sketchpad. He wondered how a girl like her, who always seemed to be involved in other’s lives (for the better) was ignoring all of the comments about her. She felt his focus centre on her, eyes flicking up to meet his, she provided him with a small wave before continuing to draw.

Jon nudged him with an elbow to his ribs and dragged him off to the side, into the boy’s locker rooms. Jon scowled at the door, “It’s a mad house out there. You’ve heard what some people are saying right?”

“Why would I care about these imbeciles?”

Jon jabbed Damian in the chest, causing the demon to stumble. Green eyes darted from blue eyes to the tan finger. “You care when lies hurt people you care about.”

The day began to rapidly decline once the two dance partners took their seats, next to each other. They had both been placed up the back of the class and them sitting together hadn’t been a problem until now apparently. She wasn’t even safe when the teacher started their lecture, whispers and glances were cast towards them. Once the two got to biology it was better, Ms Mendeleiev was a strict teacher and was able to control the class.

Everybody talks

But the recess came. When the bell rang she slowly started packing up her equipment, Alix and Max (who she shared biology with) waited for her; she watched as the Ice Prince left through the door. She knew she didn’t need to be concerned about her friends joining in with the gossiping, if anything they would dispel people and tell them to ‘Mind their own fucking business’ because this whole situations is ridiculous, utterly ridiculous.

She did receive some slight teasing from Alix about being a Disney princess, but Marinette quipped back about the skater’s fairytale story being ‘Pinknette, the Geek and the Beast’. The three met up with the other two of their group, they had just come from geography. Kim was complaining that Argentina was a state in America.

“That’s Arkansas you idiot!” Chloe shrieked, lightly hitting his arm with her white handbag. Max held his head in his hand as he approached, how had his tutoring sessions failed so badly?

Chloe turned to Marinette, a smile forming from her glare. The blonde examined the designer’s clothing, nodding. “You look like you are about to have a hot girl summer.”

Marinette’s face burned, the tips of her ears coated in red. Alix chuckled and nudged her shoulder.

Everybody talks

“Look at her, she is so desperate for his attention that she probably copied those designs.”

“Why do you think he danced with her anyways? Maybe she has something on him? I mean, she forces him to sit next to her in class, who knows what else she has done.”

What. The. Fuck.

Chloe glowered towards Lila’s posy. “We have a fucking seating plan, those cretins-“ She made a motion to storm over but was caught by the ravenette, looking back to Mari, her rage decreased from a boil to a simmer.

“No Chlo. It’s fine, it’s not worth it.”

Everybody talks... back

The group walked out to the school’s front steps, it was a mad house... a mad courtyard? Students sitting on the stairs, on the grass and standing around mingling, all of them now were staring at her. She held her backpack close to her chest (she had swapped her signature coin-bag purse for the pastel pink bag), pretending its a shield. Her friends circled around her becoming an obstacle to prevent their stares. If people were afraid of a scowling Kim then they don’t know the scorn of Chloe or Alix’s bite. And Max, sweet quiet Max.... you better hope he doesn’t have blackmail on you (he probably does), he can dismantle your life with a single anonymous post.

Rushed footsteps approached them. The group was broken apart by a rude Wayne boy, he swept Mari away from the school and the gossip crowds within. Her four friends shouted at him and he kept walking, shooting a glare at them in response. He kept pushing Marinette forward with a hand placed on the small of her back, her backpack was now swung over his other shoulder.

They ended up in her favourite alcove. She had brought him here with the other Gotham transfers for a native’s tour of Paris. It had always been her safe place to be creative.

It started with a whisper (everybody talks, everybody talks)

“My apologises for our rushed departure but you seemed to want to get out of their anyhow.” His gruff tone danced through the silence, his head still peaking around the corner; watching for any unwelcome guests.

“Thank you.” She whispered, her voice almost being carried off by the gentle wind. A genuine smile illustrated upon her face.

“We weren’t able to converse after the events of the other night. I would like to formally apologise once more for my actions causing this adverse reaction. If I had kn-“

“You don’t need to apologise!” She squeaked, hiding her eyes behind her fisted hand. Her shoulders curled inwards as she tried to make herself seem as small as possible, a side effect of her common use of her secondary miraculous form: Multimouse.

“I chose to dance with you, you don’t need to apologise for my own actions.” He stared at her with confusion. He had taken the blame so she wouldn’t need to do so herself; but she had taken it anyways. He had given her an out. Why does she always take the blame, even for things out of her control?

“But if I hadn’t danced with you then you wouldn’t have been the focus of the entire school.”

Marinette stepped forward, her eyes hardened and blazing. “Damian Friday night I went there out of obligation to my friends, I didn’t want to be there. But dancing with you? That was the highlight of my week, probably my month too. I enjoyed our time together.” Her face softened, lips twitched downwards ever so slightly. “I don’t regret anything about that night, but do you?”

He was bad at comfort. Everyone in his family avoided him when they were in need, he plainly didn’t know what to do. She wasn’t visibly upset but he sensed that she is disappointed that he apparently didn’t share the same opinion of the night. The only thing he regretted about that night was letting Jon call him a coward, but then again if he didn’t he never would have danced with Dupa- Marinette.

He picked up her clenched hand, the tension in her body alleviated at his embrace. He remembered how Grayson would apologise to Kor’i or how his father interacted with Ms Kyle. He brought their hands up and placed a kiss upon her knuckles.

And that was when I kissed her (everybody talks, everybody talks)

“I do not regret anything either—“ he cleared his throat, “In fact, I’d appreciate if we would be able to interact more, especially outside of that cesspit.”

Was he...?

It didn’t matter.

She smiled the same dazzling smile she gave him at the dance. She nodded while laughing, “I’d love that.”

Everybody talks

The two stay talking, hidden within their secret alcove for the rest of the day. She texted her parents to say she was with a friend and would be back later that night. Damian didn’t bother texting his family, Marinette knew he had to be back soon due to his dorm’s curfew.

The sun was setting at they walked back together, he did the gentlemanly thing and dropped her off at her bakery door. She could see her mother behind the register inconspicuously looking over at the two of them. Damian’s lips quirked upwards, she was satisfied with his kinda-smile.

He walked back, hands in pockets and a neutral expression upon his face instead of a scowl. He reached his door and took his keys, he found that it was already open. Damn.

His family was splayed out within his two roomed dorm. Todd and Drake were fighting over a place to sit on his bed, whilst his father sat at his desk, watching the commotion. The three of them turned to him as he enter the room, they were the only family members able to attend on short notice; Cain had a ballet audition, Gordon & Brown had concert tickets for tomorrow, Grayson had to take care of Mar’i while Kor’i was on Tamaran and Alfred stayed to ensure no one died during their night time activities.

“We need to talk Damian.” His father stood, leaning onto the desk chair. “The school called and said you had an unexcused absence for half the day. Where were you Damian?”

Damian stared into his father’s eyes. He was fifteen, almost an adult, but was treated like he was ten again.

“I was with a friend.”

“Probably the girl from the dance. Marinette, right?” Todd mocked him. Damian snapped his head in the direction of his bed, glaring at both his brothers.

“That’s what I want to talk about with you Damian. Now I don’t know her personally but from what we’ve discovered through our investigation we have some concerns. What’s happened Damian?”

The youngest Wayne’s glare shifted off of his brothers to the floor, and then finally to his father; his family sitting in wait for his answer. Straightening his posture, his shoulders clicked as he rolled then back. His statement’s tone was sure and steady, “Everybody talks father.”

Everybody talks... back

#maribat #marinette x damian #mlb x dc #batfam salt #batfam is concerned #Daminette #the aftermath of ‘Like I did with you’ #everybody talks by neon trees #max kante has blackmail and will use it #Alix will bite if provoked #dc x mlb #damian wayne x marinette dupain cheng #Marinette Dupain-Cheng is a meta? #supportive Dupain-Cheng parents ❤️

[bts-hyperfixation]

Play time - kinktober day 8

OT7 - o r gy

Smut 18+

Contains member on member and anaI

The boys hadn’t been back in the dorm five seconds before they started looking for you. You’d decided to stay in the dorm while they were away, so you still felt close to them. Yoongi had texted you as soon as they landed with an ETA and the promise of presents. Your heart fluttered at the thought of seeing your boys again, but it didn’t stop your mischievous side from immediately searching for a hiding place. You were never one to make things too easy for them.

You found a small hideaway at the back of Jungkook’s closet and pulled a box in front of the entrance to obscure you further. When you heard the door open you sent the first hint to the group chat.

Y/N: I’m hidden somewhere cosy (emoji) the first one to find me can have me all night.

JK: Anymore hints for finding you?

KTH: or do you just want us to tear the whole place apart… because I will

Y/N: See what you can find and maybe I’ll send more if I get bored

You put your phone down and listen for the boys’ whereabouts. Knowing them, they’ve probably already split up, there are no friends in competition. You hear someone enter Jungkook’s bedroom, so you squish yourself closer to the wall. You can just about make out the maknae’s profile through the small gap you’d left. He places his bag on the bed and glances around the room. For someone with so much talent, he really is terrible at treasure hunts. After he leaves, you send another hint.

Y/N: You guys have a great laundry detergent, smells so fresh

KSJ: Laundry room?

MYG: Maybe? I don’t know where there would be a hiding place in there though.

The search continued, and you sat for another 10 minutes, getting a little bored with the game.

Y/N: (Bunny emoji)

PJM: ARE YOU IN JK’S ROOM???

KNJ: HE TOLD US HE CHECKED THERE

JK: I did…

It’s not long before you hear seven pairs of footsteps heading towards the room. There is a small commotion as each of the tries to enter the room first.

“It’s my room” Jungkook whines as his hyungs push him out of the way.

“You lost your chance when you came in here the first time” Yoongi countered

“Move I should get to go first… I’m the oldest” by the sound of his voice, Jin had puffed himself up ready to take on anyone that disrespected him… of course this led to laughing from the other members. He may be the eldest, but he is by far the least threatening. You can’t help giggling at the conversation. They hear the sound and stop arguing immediately, heads snapping in the direction of the closet. You held your breath hoping they would go back to arguing, you may be getting a little bored, but you really hated to lose. No such luck. The boys made their way into the room, suddenly becoming one cohesive group again. Namjoon is the one to remove the makeshift box door you had pulled in front of your hidey hole.

Being met by his amazing dimples did help soothe the burn of making such a silly mistake and letting yourself be revealed. He offered you his hand and helped you out of the hiding spot before pulling you into the tightest hug he could manage. Soon you were smothered by all the boys, struggling to breath, but also struggling to care as you relaxed into their touch. This world tour had been their longest yet. After a short while they released you and you took in their appearances. Longer hair and tired eyes, but still very much as handsome as when they left.

“So does Namjoon get me? Technically he did find me” you tease walking your fingers up the leader’s chest. The boys around you letting out incredulous groans.

“That’s not fair, we all found you together, he just moved the box!” Jimin whined wrapping his arms around your waist, his way of protesting your advances on his hyung.

“Well then what do you suggest? Want to share?” each of the boys looked at each other in turn and nodded. They often shared you between them, after all they loved each other just as much, but it was very rare for all seven to be with you at the same time. They liked to make sure you were always comfortable. Right now though, all any of you wanted was to feel each other’s skin.

Jimin’s hands move to the hem of your shirt, playing with the fabric and exposing a slither of your stomach to the other boys. Hoseok is on his knees in front of you instantly, licking a line across your newly exposed skin. His fingers hook around your belt loops and he shuffles your jeans down your legs, just as Jimin pulls you shirt over your head. The remaining five watch you closely. Their eyes graze up your body taking in the new lingerie you’d bought for their return. The cute bralette and bikini set did wonders for you. Jimin’s hands find their way to your covered breasts, rubbing your nipples through the sheer fabric making you lean back into his chest and let out a sigh of pleasure. Hoseok, never one to be outdone, takes this opportunity to sharply bite into the flesh of your thigh.

Clearly the sight had been too much for some of the boys. Taehyung and Namjoon were together in a similarly compromising position, Tae’s sweats around his ankles as Joonie rubbed at the younger boy’s member through his boxers. You let yourself focus on the two of them. The sight has you so aroused, you can feel your core dripping already. Hoseok chooses this moment to run a finger along the middle of your panties.

“So wet already?” Hoseok taunts “Did you really miss us that much?” you fidget at the sensation and nod sheepishly, all eyes on you suddenly making you shy. Hoseok chuckles a little then goes back to running his tongue along your thighs, teasing you softly. Every time he got close to your underwear he would pull away and start a similar trail up your other leg.

“Fuck this” Jungkook’s curse is the only warning you get before you are thrown over his shoulder and carried out into the main part of his bedroom. He carefully lays you down on the mattress before climbing on top of you. His lips meet yours in a passionate kiss, months of pent up need and want manifesting in this one action. It doesn’t take long until the two of you are broken apart by a slightly disgruntled Yoongi. the older member reprimands the maknae for taking you away. You giggle as he helps JK strip and decides on his punishment. Of course, the youngest is all too eager to please, he drops to his knees mouth wide and ready to be abused. Yoongi unbuckles his pants and places his dick on Jungkook’s waiting tongue. Without hesitation Jungkook deep throats his hyung. The usually stoic rapper lets out a scandalous wail.

In the meantime, Jin has made his way to you, sitting up on the pillows. He pulls you so you are sat between his legs and signals for you to remove your panties. You oblige and throw the offending article on to the floor. His long fingers trail down your sides and find their way to your clit, he rubs the sensitive nub in lazy circles as the two of you watch Jungkook’s punishment, although from this angle it definitely looks like more of a treat. The sensation made you wriggle, causing pleasure but not enough to help you get anywhere.

“What’s wrong baby?” Jin’s lips graze your ears as he speaks. You whine a little in response hoping he would get the message. “Words babygirl… I need your words” you take a deep breath before you speak

“I need you to move faster” You had never been good at vocalising what you wanted from a lover. A fatal flaw really, it had often left you unsatisfied before you found the band. Instantly his fingers build speed. Figures of 8 drawn in your most sensitive area, the exhilaration almost proving too much for you. If that hadn’t been enough what came next certainly helped. Your eyes were scrunched closed trying to focus on the feeling Jin was giving you, when his expert fingers were joined by an equally talented tongue. You opened one eye and found Taehyung staring back up at you. His deep brown eyes filled with desire as he lapped up the juices that had been flowing freely onto the sheets below you. You’re orgasm hit quickly with the new addition. Both boys continuing until they were sure you had come back down, the stimulation almost proving too much as you whimpered. Taehyung kissed his way up your body. You expected him to finish his trail with your lips but instead he aims around you to access Jin. You’re left sandwiched between the two men as they shared the taste of you in a deep kiss.

You glance passed them to watch the show Jungkook and Yoongi were still giving. The sight calls to you and you crawl out from under Taehyung. Positioning yourself behind the elder, you take the opportunity to part his cheeks and run your tongue along his entrance. The action shocks him, forcing him to lose the control he had. Hot cum shoots down JK's unsuspecting throat. The black haired boy chokes at the unexpected sensation but does his best to swallow what he is given. Yoongi pets his head, praising him, before turning to glare at you. A sheepish grin spreads across your face as you shrug innocently at him.

Unfortunately, the domineering rapper doesn’t fall for your feigned innocence. Instead, pulling you up from your knees and grabbing your hair at the nape of your neck.

“That wasn’t nice y/n, poor Kookie could’ve gotten hurt.” His face is millimetres from yours. You can feel his lips graze against yours as he speaks

“I'm sorry” your eyes are on the ground, an effort to suppress the shit-eating grin fighting it’s way on to your face. The pale boy uses his leverage to force you back on to the bed. You find yourself lying with your head on Namjoon’s toned thigh, your mouth now in the perfect place to lick at his hardened member. You stick out your tongue and try to lick at the tantalising treat that had been placed in front of you. Just before you can wrap your mouth around it, Joon pulls it from your reach.

“I believe you’re in trouble baby... Naughty girls dont get what they want” Joon’s eyes are filled with mischievous malice. You were too busy having a staring contest with the leader to notice the punishment Yoongi was preparing for you. That is until the chilly sensation of lube makes an appearance in between your butt cheeks. Suga laughs as you jump in surprise, coating his finger in the liquid before pressing his way into your back entrance. You squeak at the intrusion and the tag-teaming rapline just laugh. Namjoon takes this opportunity to let his dick fall back within your reach and You lap at it hungrily. Just when you get used to the stretch of one finger Yoongi adds one more, prepping you, he repeats this process until he decides you've had enough foreplay. He summons Jungkook to take his places, first rubbing a generous amount of lube on his lovers cock. Jungkook lines himself up and pushes deep inside your ass. You groan around Namjoon’s dick making him quiver at the added pleasure.

Jk waits until he feels you relax to start moving, placing your legs over his shoulders to gain better access. Neither boy was able to last very long due to the pent up energy they had left over from tour. Namjoon came first, coming all over your face. There’s nothing that boy likes more than to see you wearing him. Jungkook sees his hyung's seed dripping from your chin as he opened his previously squeezed eyes. It is enough to send him over his edge. He pulls out of you and aims his cum to mix in the same place. The maknae would take any excuse he could to see you covered in multiple members cum.

Jimin took this opportunity to crawl on the bed next to you, running his tongue through the puddle on the side of your face. He hungrily lapped the remains of the cum from your face before kissing you deeply dragging you away from Namjoon in the process. The middle member let out a whine in protest until Jungkook filled the newly vacated space idly tracing patterns on Joon's stomach as they both recovered from their highs. The two were notoriously needy after their orgasms.

Jimin moved you so you were straddling him, his hard tip pressed into your opening, waiting. Waiting for you to lower yourself down into his lap properly. You take an agonizingly long time to slide down his full length, letting out a long moan as you did so. You slowly bounce yourself up and down, winding him up, wondering how long it would take for him to flip you over and take you as hard and fast as he could. The man was not known for his sexual patience.

Just as you thought, the smaller man can’t wait long before you are manoeuvred on to your hands and knees. Your met with the sight of Hobi's dick stood to full attention in front of you. Clear that the two mean to take you together you open your mouth ready and willing. The two thrust in tandem, in, out, in, out. The speed increasing gradually as both chase their orgasms. You find yourself also nearing your second finish just as a new pair of hands find their way to your clit. Taehyung appears from underneath you rubbing at your clit fiercely, to a point where it’s almost painful. Almost. Your second orgasm causes both your pussy and throat to spasm, finishing both men off in one quick motion. The seven of you are panting and sweaty, collapsed in cuddly heaps on the large bed.

“So how was tour? You ask after catching your breath

Kinktober

Masterlist

Please let me know what you think or if you have any requests for the last 6 fics here

#bts imagines #BTS smut #namjoon smut #hoseok smut #jim smut #jimin smut #taehyung smut #jungkook smut #ot7 polygamous #kinktober #yoongi smut #100 #200 #300

[kaiparker-avengerssmut]

Their Doll 11

Silent scream

B.Barnes x Stark!Reader, S.Rogers x Stark!Reader

series synopsis:  y/n Stark, all records of her non existent, and yet Hydra still find her. When she is kidnapped by a certain super-soldier and no one believes her, she finds herself searching for unexpected familiarity in her not-so-distant past.

Series Warnings: smut, violence, torture, swearing

Chapter Summary: y/n gets shut up

Warnings: mentions of violence, swearing

A/n: The timeline in this has been altered, as there I things I wanted to include but I also wanted this fic to follow the storyline/timeline of Winter Soldier and Civil war.So for purposes of this fanfic, Peter Parker was discovered by Tony at a much younger age - when he was bitten - and has been an intern with him since, almost like a protégée.(For the purposes of this story Peter was bitten much younger too - more like when he was 9 or ten rather than 14/15)

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

"Fuck you." I snapped, mustering all the saliva I could before spitting it at his face. He flinched back when it splattered over his cheek, his fingers swiping through the spittle before he was shaking it from them and standing back to his full height.

"It appears this one is never going to cooperate. If she won't give us information, why let our experimentations on her possibly...benefit the girl the the future?" The general spoke menacingly to the guards behind me. "How about way find a way to shut her up?"

My heat thudded so hard in my chest it was like someone was punching me from the inside, all air knocked from my lungs before I was being hoisted up to my feet again with two rough grips on my upper arms. My chest heaving, I coughed a ragged breath before composing myself. The glint of the silver blade in the corner of my vision sent my eyes bugging out of my skull and my mind into a flat panic.

So, I did what any rational person with my capabilities would do. I began to hum the deep melody - one a seldom sung - and a smirk crawled its way onto my now curved lips. Clearly, the general was prepared, but the two guards behind we weren't so lucky.

A desperate cry pierced my tune, harmonising with my voice as I heard the havoc I was causing. This was the first time I'd enjoyed a kill, the very first time I'd wanted to use my powers for such a horrific reason. I'd only ever used this part of my power a few times, but this was the only time I'd been fully lucid whilst doing so.

Some people want nothing more than to blow their enemies' brains out, and trust me when I tell you; It felt good.

However, luck was never on my side, and the General had come full prepared. He wasn't even affected, it must've been something to do with the funny earpiece he was wearing.

As my eyes met his, the General's face held non of the cocky, smug tones that I'd expect. No, the only word I could use to describe his old and crinkled features was pure ire, and it was directed at me.

"You conniving, vile little bitch!" He snarled, the flash of silver weeding a sense of utter and complete dread, tangled with fear inside of me, uprooting my confidence. I don't remember a lot after that, to tell you the truth. I know the blade sliced along my throat. I know everything was rained black. And that's about it.

...

Awakening with a gasp was the last thing I expected to happen. The sight of the blade risen in front of the general burned into my mind, almost as if it'd been scorned against my flesh. But here I was: awake, gasping for breath, completely surrounded by doctors I'd never seen before.

My hand instantly flew to my neck, a stinging sensation pulsing from the delicate skin. I hissed as my sweaty palm made contact with the bandage, the material corse and scratchy against my skin. As a doctor waddled over to me, needle in hand, I flailed desperately, a silent scream ripping from my throat.

Hang on a second-

Silent scream? I tried again, the shrill noise that should be tearing from me simply vanishing as it hit my throat. My eyes widened with the realisation, my bottom lip wobbling as I suddenly pieces together what had happened.

He said he'd have to shut me up, didn't he? The thought made me want to scream loudly, that the blade had touched my skin and left me with no defence.

They took away the hell they'd reigned upon me, something I'd wished I could be rid of for years, and now I was disappointed. Maybe this was their plan all along, that little voice in my head sang. The tears pricked at my eyes, which rolled back lazily as the scratch of the needle poked at my neck.

...

My calloused fingers ran over the cut tirelessly, trying to itch somewhere that I could never seem to find. I don't know how long I was sedated for, but since waking up the bleeding had stopped and there was now an offensive red line that slid horizontally across my neck.

Every time I touched it, it coaxed a wince from me, and yet that's all I seemed to do. It was like poking a bruise, I guess. The more it hurts the more you want to do it.

They'd returned me to my cell, clearly very little need for restraints against my weakened, starved and dehydrated body. I could see the flesh thinning on my arms, my ribs pressing painfully against my skin. Not only could I see the hunger, but I could feel it.

Manifesting, biting, gnawing hunger. The type that are you from inside out, devouring everything of you until the only thing you could think about was eating. Huh, I guess I was already at that stage then.

My eyes remained locked in place, glossy with the endless tears as I stared at the floor. If I really looked hard enough, the still wet blood smeared over the floors of the hallway resembled something close to strawberry jam. The thoughts of the sickly sweat substance spread over a perfectly toasted piece of bread, accompanied with a big glass of fresh orange juice and washed down by a large coffee made my mouth water. The booming rumble in my stomach made the groan, even more drawn out than expected when I remembered all I'd get to eat today: a small bread roll and a tiny glass of water.

Sadly, the sink in my cell did not contain drinking water. The liquid was so discoloured that I purposely avoided washing me hands, preferring to possible have my own germs coating my hands than whatever they were giving me. I'm not kicking you about, I genuinely think the water was filtered through a clump of fucking horse shit, mixed with fish guts and complimented with a hint of rotting fruit. If I could help it, I'd be dodging that water like the plague (if it didn't contain one already) for the rest of my life.

I'm not really sure why, but my head snapped up in surprise why the door sprang open, a single guard entering.

"The general requires your presence." He deadpanned, eyes cold as eyes and sharp as a knife as they stabbed through me. I wanted to fight back, stay glued to the spot and snap back some snarky remark, but in my current condition I almost couldn't bring myself to care where I was about to be taken, or why for that matter.

I stood without a word, silently following the man until we reached an unfamiliar metal door. I found it almost laughable, really, that they'd reduced my strength so much, that no one even considered putting me any sort of restraints anymore.

The door was pushed open with a child-like whine emitting from its rusty hinges, the metal scraping over the concrete floor painfully. The guard simply grabbed my arm before tugging me into the room, letting the door shut behind his with a hollow thunk.

"Ah, she has arrived!" The general's voice exclaimed, a deviant smile spreading over his thin lips. "And just in time to meet Mr Pierce, too." He said menacingly.

I felt embarrassed, exposed, stood before the room of men. My hair was a mess, tears streaking my reddened face, eyes puffy from crying and the only clothes a wore was a now-battered hospital gown. My eyes darted around nervously, trying to avoid the blonde man sat before me, chin resting in his palm as he surveyed me.

"Why is this one...important?" The man asked, eyeing me up and down before his eyes seemed to fixate on my neck. The scar.

"This," the general spoke, but Mr Pierce kept his eyes on me, "is Miss y/n Stark." Mr Pierce's eyes widened ever so slightly, but it was barely noticeable.

"As in Tony Stark?" Pierce pondered.

"The very same." The general smirked.

"She seems awfully...quiet, for a Stark." Pierce said with almost a hint of disgust, eyes still glued to my shaking frame.

"That's because we shut her up." The general snapped, awfully harshly.

"Is that the scar? How fresh is it?" Pierce jabbed his questions, curiosity clearly becoming him in the moment.

"Indeed. Our doctors here are very good, Sir. They had her all patched up and out of bandages in just three days." The general bragged, shoulders back and head held high as if he was posing for a portrait.

"I see." Pierce mused, brows furrowed in thought. "What do you plan to do with her? Now that she can't tell you anything?"

"Oh, trust me, sir. She wasn't giving anything up either way," he paused, striding over to me and yanking my head back with a fistful of hair, my back mow  pressed to his chest and his mouth at my ear, "isn't that right, sweetheart?"he clarified, and I didn't hesitate to nod my head as much as his grip would allow.

"So why isn't she dead?" Pierce gritted, seemingly annoyed. "It's not like Tony's attached to her, he never looked for her and I've never even heard him mention her."

"But then they'll keep coming. I don't want the avengers on my back, and I'm sure you don't either." Pierce hummed in agreement. "She's with them - her and that Captain America guy arrived together - so why not use her to send a message?" The general suggested.

...

That's how I found myself tied up, wrists bound and gun to my head as I sat shakily in a chair in the middle of the quinjet. I had no clue how long I'd been since that day, but I do know that I had been sedated once again. The flimsy hospital gown allowed a shiver to chill me, skin  forming goosebumps as I sat before the open door or the quinjet.

"You will tell them exactly as I just did. Got it?" The general pressed, pushing the gun into my head hard enough to make by head throb. Tears biting at my eyes, I nodded furiously, now determined to live with the promise of being free again. "Good. Soldat, make sure she gets back to New York without being seen, I'd hate to have to spill more blood than we intended." The general demanded, a figure rustling its way out of the shadows at the edge of the room. A gasp tore from my throat at the sight of him - clad in black leather and arm as silver as the moon. The soldier - my soldier.

But he simple stared through me, eyes blank and clouded in a coldness I'd never had directed at me from him before.

"And make sure you don't fail this time, soldat." The general snapped. The soldier nodded solemnly, the echoing of boots thudding filling both their ears as the general walked off the ship.

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[fruitcoops]

Remus gets injured in a game. I have literally read everything you have written but i'm not sure if you have wrote one like this. If you have, ANOTHER PLZZ

Hello anon! I wove this together with a couple different prompts, listed below:

1. Coops argument

2. Prompt 21: “You need to eat something”

3. Remus gets in a fight with Snape

4. Protective Sirius

5. Coops going home grumpy after losing a game (see link)

Sweater Weather credit goes to @lumosinlove! TW for fights, blood, bruises, arguments, and someone getting called a wh*re

Snape’s cheek gave easily beneath Remus’ fist, which was a tad bit surprising. He wrapped his other hand in the neckline of his jersey, yanking him back in to land another punch to the side of his head—that would leave a nasty bruise in the morning. Stars sparkled in his vision as Snape got a lucky shot in and he doubled down, ignoring the thin line of pain that trickled down his chin.

“Break it up, boys, that’s enough!” The referee’s whistle blew as he and another pried Remus’ hands off Snape’s jersey; someone took him by the shoulders and pushed him away from the fight. Pots.

“Say it again!” Remus shouted at Snape as the refs and their teammates continued pulling them apart. “Say it again and I’ll knock your fucking teeth in!”

James’ hold on him faltered for a second as another person skated over and tried to join the melee. “Cap, no!”

“Move, Pots.”

“Loops won the fight, it’s done. Let’s just keep playing.” James shoved both their chests hard enough to send them back a few inches, but Remus’ blood boiled as he ground his mouthguard between his teeth. He glanced up at the clock—3:16 left in the third, Snakes up by two. Their win was almost guaranteed and Snape was still pulling this bullshit.

He skated quickly over to the bench and mumbled his thanks to Hestia as she pressed some gauze to his lip and ice to his cheek. “Lupin, you’re in for the rest of the game,” Coach Weasley said, tapping him on the arm with his playboard. “Anything broken?”

“No, Coach.”

“Then get your ass back out on the ice and score some points. We need some speed.”

He could feel the fury rolling off Sirius as they wove through the Snakes’ defense, shooting again and again to no avail. Frustration built up in every nerve—he was worried about the win, of course, but mostly he was pissed. Pissed at Snape, pissed at James for pushing him, and pissed at Sirius for butting into the fight.

Remus scored a final goal just as the buzzer sounded. Hissing filled the stadium, even though it was a home game. Snape smirked at him as he skated past and the only thing keeping him from dragging him right back in by his greasy hair was the possible suspension.

The shower was cold, because of course the fucking shower was cold. Remus shoved his stuff in his duffel and waited outside the locker room, silently fist bumping the guys as they left. God, he hated losing games. It was inevitable, but it always felt shitty.

“How’s the lip?” Sirius asked when he finally came out, bag slung over his shoulder.

“Fine. What the fuck was that?”

“What was what?”

“You butted into my fight. Nobody asked you to.”

Sirius’ eyebrows rose. “Re, he called you—”

“Yeah, I know what he called me,” Remus snapped, practically slamming the door to the parking lot closed. “I was there.”

The only reason you’re on this team is because you’re the captain’s whore, Snape had sneered. He bit the inside of his cheek as his anger flared at the memory. “I was just trying to help,” Sirius grumbled.

“Well, you didn’t. You proved his fucking point.”

“I didn’t prove shit!” Sirius scoffed as they got in the car. Immediately, Remus felt claustrophobic.

“I had it handled, Sirius!”

“You’re still bleeding!”

Remus ran his tongue along his lip—sure enough, the salty tang of blood filled his mouth. He swore under his breath and held his sleeve to his lip; his cheekbone throbbed and he knew it would be swollen in mere hours.

“Here.”

“I don’t need that.”

“You’d rather stain your sleeve than accept a tissue from me?”

“It’s a black sweatshirt, it’s fine.” Sirius muttered something. “Care to share with the class?”

Sirius sighed as he turned off the freeway. “I said it was your idea to keep these here in the first place. I don’t know why you’re being all pissy with me. We’ve lost games before.”

“I’m pissed because you don’t think I can handle myself in a fight.”

Sirius took his eyes off the road for a half second in shock. “Excuse me? Why do you think that?”

“I just told you!” Remus said, exasperated. “Snape was being a dick, so I punched him. I didn’t need your hero complex to swoop in and save the day.”

“Re, I didn’t even get a hand on him. Pots—”

“Oh, I’m pissed at him as well,” Remus snorted, staring out the passenger window at the blurry lights against the dark. “If someone calls me a whore, I’d rather get the message across that they can’t do it again.”

“Would you rather have gotten a penalty?”

“Yes.”

“That is unbelievably selfish.”

Remus laughed without humor. “Y’know, it’s really funny that you’ve never had this conversation with Logan, the king of the penalty box. Is it because he’s not a delicate flower like me?”

“Wh—” Sirius clenched his jaw and took a deep breath. “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, Remus. I have never seen you as a—a delicate flower. For your information, I have chewed Logan out on multiple occasions.”

Remus gritted his teeth and trained his gaze firmly out the window. He heard Sirius sigh next to him and it took every ounce of willpower to keep his composure. The next ten minutes were dead silent and deeply uncomfortable, which was a rarity with them; even after losses, they would talk through the errors or try to lighten the mood.

Both of them closed their doors a little harder than necessary when they got to the house and Hattie trotted over hesitantly when they came inside. “Hey, Hatters,” Remus murmured, crouching down to her level and holding a hand out. She licked his cheek and let him bury his face in her thick fur—Sirius scratched her ears as he walked past. “Did you have a good time while we were out? Huh, baby girl?” He looked up and saw the tail end of Sirius’ eye roll. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“Don’t bullshit me, Sirius, it doesn’t work. I’m giving the dog a hug because I’m still pissed at you.”

“There is literally no good reason for you to be pissed at me!” Sirius finally said, tossing his keys into the bowl by the door. “Holy shit, Re, I don’t even think you’re mad at me!”

“Oh, yeah? Then who am I mad at, oh great and wise captain?” Remus practically spat, shouldering past him into the kitchen and wrenching a cabinet open. “Please enlighten me.”

“I wish I knew!”

Remus slammed the bread down on the counter and glared at him. “Then maybe you should shut the fuck up if you don’t have anything to support your claim.”

“Acting like this is a goddamn debate club isn’t helping. Your lip is bleeding again.”

“Fuck.” Remus ripped a paper towel off the roll and dampened it, holding it to his lip with a wince. Sirius opened the freezer and dug around for a moment with another paper towel. “I don’t remember you getting hit.”

“This is for you, you stubborn fucker,” Sirius said as he walked over and pressed it gently to the side of Remus’ face. “Better?”

“…a bit.”

The tension on Sirius’ face began to fade; he just looked concerned as he pulled the ice away and checked the bruise. “Your eye might swell.”

“Yeah.”

“Do you actually want to talk now, or should we yell a little more?”

Remus sighed and felt his anger abate. He was beyond exhausted, and still upset, but having Sirius nearby was like balm on a burn. “I don’t know.”

“I’m going to make some sandwiches. Hold this.” Sirius tapped the ice towel and moved to the abandoned loaf, grabbing some peanut butter and jelly as he went.

“I’m not hungry.”

“You need to eat something.”

“I’m fine.”

Sirius glanced over his shoulder and gave him a look. “I know you, Re. You’re not going to feel better unless you get some food, and neither will I.”

“I hate it when you’re reasonable.”

“No, you don’t.”

Remus’ lack of response was enough of an answer. The pain stretched to his forehead and he grimaced, prodding his lip cautiously. Sirius whistled for Hattie and spread the leftover peanut butter from the knife onto a clean spoon, holding it down for her to lick. A smile tugged the corner of Remus’ mouth. “Cute.”

“I can be cute on occasion.”

“You’re always cute.” There was a beat of quiet. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re forgiven. I’m sorry for yelling.”

“Not for interrupting the fight?”

“Nope.”

“That’s fair.” Something tickled at the back of Remus’ throat. “I fucking hate Snape.”

“Me, too.”

“Surprisingly enough, it feels pretty shitty to be called a whore. Who would’ve thought?”

Sirius turned and faced him, sleeves rolled to his elbows. His eyes were soft. “You know that’s not true, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Remus. What he said wasn’t true. You have nothing to prove to anyone on the team, least of all to me. You earned that spot on the roster fair and square, and Snape’s just freaked out because there’s another player who could grind him into the dust without breaking a sweat.” He stepped closer and leaned on the counter next to Remus, leaving a few inches between them. “I don’t think you’re a whore, if that means anything.”

Remus laughed softly. “Of all the people out there, I think you’re the only one who could reliably make that assumption.”

Sirius didn’t smile. “You’re my best friend and also my fiancé. The sex is a great bonus, but my favorite part of being with you is just being with you.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” Remus muttered, though the sharp edges began to smooth in his gut. He closed the distance between them and laid his head on Sirius’ shoulder. “Love you.”

“I love you, too. Can I take a look at your lip?”

“Sure.” Remus peeled the towel away and Sirius bent slightly, poking the area around it. “Ouch.”

“That’ll probably take a week or so to heal. He got you good.”

Remus pouted. “No kisses for a week?”

Sirius did laugh that time, bright and sunny enough that Remus nearly made his lip bleed again with the answering smile. “I said nothing about no kisses.” Warm lips trailed from his unbruised cheekbone to the edge of his mouth, leaving tiny tingles in their wake.

“I really am sorry about what I said. You were right, I wasn’t angry with you, and I had no right to go off like that.”

Sirius shrugged. “It happens.”

“It shouldn’t.”

“Then let’s agree to talk first, bite heads off later, okay?” He held his pinky out and Remus linked it with his own, kissing it quickly.

“Deal. Are the sandwiches done? I’m starving.”

Wordlessly, Sirius handed him a sandwich and hopped up to sit on the counter, scooting over to make room for Remus to join him. They ate quietly, swinging their legs as the calmness of the kitchen crept back in once more.