#and it's still fucking me up?????

[artkaninchenbau]

A h-heartfelt reunion..?

Bonus

#Sir Crocodile #Monkey D Dragon #Emporio Ivankov #Dragodile #Crocodad #My art #One Piece #We're not gonna talk about the work I should be doing rn I have Severe Procrastinitis and I'm doing my best okay #Alternative version where it was both Crocodile and Garp beating Dragon's ass before Iva-chan joined in but that was too much effort lmao #I'm a believer in Dragon being a Wind Logia so don't worry guys he is 100% taking this beating intentionally #He knows what he did and he's dealing with the concequences of his actions. With grace. #You know I realize Iva-chan should be two whole meters taller than Crocodile but we're just gonna ignore that #Look Iva-chan taking Crocodile's side and being like ''Crocoboy is right you fucked up bad Dragon'' brings me joy #And for real I've been wanting to draw this for months. But never did because I had other shit to do. Which I still do #But. You know. Sometimes you need to draw a shitpost. It's ✨ self-care ✨ #And appearently One Piece shitpost comics have become the thing I draw for myself on occassion

[samble-moved]

post itself

false flags

trans/adjacent tags

accessibility features

tumblr live post (thanks for the link, @problemnyatic)

flashing / strobing / lights

unblockable flashing ad

buying ad free

staff @/macmanx guilt trip

list of staff + more issues

#post nuked bc proshippers started insulting people who rbed this and implied partyjockers attempted to Kill staff? it was getting old so #archive links still under the cut if you want and you can rb this from others if you want the og #hint: if you dislike this post or want to debunk parts of it the way to go about it isn't to call people who've rbed it 'disgusting little #fuck ups' that are 'spreading anti shipper lies' #note: this post is and was Not about ship discourse jesus fucking christ proshippers get a grip #also ace discoursers are here too? this isn't about you either? #edit 2: if you send me an anon regarding this post about how im policing discussion or 'don't really want it' #but then stop replying when i answer your ask #maybe that's. not helping discussion? #i nuked this post as people started making up false accusations to smear people staff sniped. aka accusing someone of IRL ATTEMPTED MURDERS.

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME #there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing #and the writing is what i need to be doing #writeblr #this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to #edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol #i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!! #my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means #i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her) #hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong #i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet. #i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse #i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!! #i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO #i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness #and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it #im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us #i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer #and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art. #i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work #even if it means being miserable #but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[lotus-pear]

cringefail exes oh my god

#sry for not drawing skk for four posts here u guys go. eat up #“i hate bsd so much i'm fucking LEAVING” i say as i make no effort to disassociate with the fandom or the show #i miss how i used to view skk😔😔😔😔😔 the silly lovers to enemies who are still clearly infatuated w each other after seven years #their backstory ruined me i hate it here #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd #dazai osamu #osamu dazai #nakahara chuuya #chuuya nakahara #soukoku #skk #lotus draws

[ipostmysimpingstuffanonymously]

They live in my head rent free. Drop your headcanons in the reblogg tags

#uni au where they go to every party and fucking trash it #headcanon that gojo only drinks coke cause one sip and 30 minutes he's lying somewhere striped naked and unconcious #stst bribing shoko into any shinanegan by buying her cigs #shoko drinks them both under the table but suguru actually can keep up with ehr #also weed does weird things to gojo's six eyes 100% confirmed so he is catious #still the loudes mf at the party even if he's sober af #i love them #these three are the best thing that ever happened to me #sashisu #satosho #sugusho #satosugu #stsg #gojo satoru #shoko ieiri #suguru geto #jujutsu kaisen #fanart #satosho weekend #satoshoko #jjk #IPMSSA_Tokyo5!Fanart #IPMSSA_FoundFamily!Fanart #IPMSSA_SaShiSu!Fanart

[taffywabbit]

i have lots of flaws but i do at least take a fair amount of comfort knowing that, if i were a customer NPC in a fast food/retail management game, i would be one of the chill early-level ones that can wait a super long time before they start getting impatient, and you breathe a sigh of a relief when you see them show up in a harder level

#buny text #was standing in line at popeyes today and they were SUPER busy and the staff couldn't even take my order for a while #and the guy at the till was like 'so sorry for the wait we'll get to you soon i promise' and i was like hey no worries 👍 #and he gave me this look that i understood from my own time in retail to mean 'thank you for being fucking normal' #there was nobody else behind me cuz i showed up at the very end of the lunch rush i think #and in that moment i just pictured like. a lil timer wheel above my head that was still green and mostly full lmao #i love being nice to retail workers it's so fun

[thedgeofsleep]

i hope the fnaf movie sequel introduces the puppet and we get a scene of the puppet crawling through the rain to die with the kid like in fnaf 6 bc i would never emotionally recover for the rest of my life

#ky.txt #fnaf #fnaf movie #it's been years and this STILL fucks me up

[amelia-yap]

warrior

#ruby rose #rwby #my art #for one of my assignments where we could chose any fictional character of our liking to render #wanted to go for weiss but #sweet baby bastard is so bloody white. i am not rendering all that white. naw #might draw her on my own time lol #ruby's v7 hair still greatly confuses me lmao #the ear is so fucked up hghhhh #this could've been better but im too tired to give any more fucks hjhhhhjh #one more week sth until sem break again!!! १(>益<१) #gonna go barf out the remaining work i gotta do byee

[chthonic-kids]

IT'S ON SIGHT CHRONOS

#hades #hades game #hades supergiant #hades 2 #hades 2 spoilers #THIS IS ALL SHE HAS TO REMEMBER THEM BY #CHRONOS YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARD #this trope in fiction always fucks me up real bad and i'm trying so hard not to cry about it #SHE'S GOTTA SAVE A FAMILY SHE BARELY KNOWS BUT STILL LOVES #melinoë #zagreus #persephone

[slymanner]

hurt my heart why dontcha.

#adventure time #fionna and cake #fionna and cake spoilers #simon petrikov #BMO #this is seriously fucked up u cant do this to me im so sadSNSSN #IMAGINE BEING BMO #just one day finn and jake say they'll brb and they're going on a important mission... #and BMO after this and them being gone for awhile just see's the world go into peril #death everywhere. no sign of his friends expect remnant's of the past.. #and the only survivor is them... #no other's expect the thing who released hell upon this once lively and colorful world in the first place. #and BMO just accept's this...tells themselves that they're still around...cosplay's as they're old friend's...this is fucked up #in the current timeline all his friend's are gone to natural circumstances. #but for this one? it was too early. too sudden. atleast in this one BMO will remember they're name's but...man. #this poor lil robo cant get a BREAK. #AND THEY FUCKING DIE IN SACRIFICE AT THE END TOO SHUTUPPPDPDPDPD #and the fact BMO also consider's “jerry” a friend...not knowing...that the same person caused all this. #this is...SO FUCKED UP #WHY MUST THE SHOW WRITERS DO THIS TO MY HEART.

[puppyeared]

littlest furth shop

@laikascomet

#i think i had a little too much fun with this lol #i also wanted to draw road boy and other characters but maybe when they actually get introduced #i do have a sketch of him with a lil chainsaw.. im not gonna be normal when he gets introduced man he looks so sillygoofy #if you squint laika's eye marking is a clover yue's is a crescent moon and mars' is a star ^_^ #i wanted to give laika an accessory too but i couldnt think of anything.. maybe a stack of pancakes?? #im curious to see the apocalypse side of the story too.. like so far we have an idea of the comet fucking everything up #and im assuming that lead to a ripple effect causing the apocalypse but exactly how bad?? i cant wait to find out #rn im kinda piecing stuff together.. larkspur delivers mail in a beat up van so that might mean all transportation is grounded #the buildings we've seen so far are intact like the observatory and turnip's house but idk if thats the same for big cities #laikas playlist only includes songs downloaded on yue's computer and there hasnt been internet in 20 years.. but radio signals might #still work.. if yue grows his own food we can assume that mass production and distribution also isnt a thing anymore #sorry im a sucker for worldbuilding.. and the furth puns are fun to me. i like to think toronto would be clawronto.. and vancouver wld #be nyancouver.. barktic circle.. mewfoundland and labrador.. canyada.... #christ i have so many drawing ideas. willow if youre reading this im so sorry youre probably gonna expect to see a lot of drawings frm me #like. i wanna draw laika in the akira bike pose so sosososo bad. IT WOULD BE SO AWESOMECOOL. ill teach myself to draw bikes if i have to #i also wanted to animate laika leekspin.. man #my art #myart #fanart #laika's comet #laikas comet #laika #mars #yue #furry art #fur #littlest pet shop #lps

[clouvu]

Nothing in the world belongs to me But my love, mine, all mine

#genshin impact #arlecchino #peruere #clervie #ouhhhhhhhh im never gonna be able to emotionally recover from watching that animated short #ever since it came out a couple days ago just thinking of these two makes me feel like my heart is physically being ripped in half #i cant stop thinking about how Clervie was the only person in Arlecchino's life that she truly loved #like dont get me wrong Arlecchino loves her children in her own detached-fucked up way as much as any person with her amount of trauma can #but Clervie meant so much to her that even just her presence alone kept Arle's curse at bay #and it seems that no one other than Clervie herself has ever been able to break this unemotional/detached wall that Arle has put up #and maybe no one else ever will #DONT GET ME WRONG I still fw arle x other female harbingers like that shit is still peak #but oh my god the idea that arle never moved on after clervie's death and will never love anyone the way she loved her makes me want to SOB

[avephelis]

twenties mutant ninja turtles or whatever you call it

#i think a lot about post-canon (good timeline) stuff with the turtles i feel like it's an untapped field. idk if ive mentioned it ever lol. #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt leo #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt raph #rise leo #rise donnie #rise mikey #rise raph #avepharts #let's call this uhhh #rot20mnt #also the leo arm constant is that he loses an arm no matter the timeline BUT HEY! look it's the other one this time #and yeah the “mikey's hair is seaweed/algae” thing still fucks me up

[crescentfool]

reunion 🌸

#persona 3 #persona 3 spoilers #minato arisato #makoto yuki #ryoji mochizuki #aigis #ryomina #lizzy does art #HELLO EVERYONE!!! march 5th is upon us again so i bring... my contribution for this year. my third year drawing for it! #i made the thumbnail for this a few weeks after last year's graduation day #i thought it would be fun to lean into the ryominaigis angle of graduation day (you could read this as minato/aigis if you like- #but i feel like most people would read it as ryoji/minato) #IN ANY CASE working on this made me very emotional over this game :') (specifically minato) #i really enjoy how p3 ends it's such a nice way of wrapping up the narrative's messages and themes #working on this. minato's kindness was at the forefront of my mind throughout the piece #and i really wanted to capture how. ultimately it was his decision to sacrifice himself- to do the great seal #while to an outsider's perspective it is. sad that minato passes. i think becoming the seal is something that minato- #actively welcomes. in the same way that death (ryoji) is a comfort to him because death was housed in him for Ten YearsTM #AND I ALSO GOT REALLY SAD OVER AIGIS TOO. i still get fucked up over how in fes's animated cutscene for 3/5 they portray- #her as human and not drawing the robot parts so i wanted to do something smilar here... #but also i am very sad on aigis's behalf because she discovers her humanity through minato and realizes what she- #wants to do and then. well. minato is like. he's ready to pass on (even if he's scared) and im like. OH MY GOD THIS TRIO GETS ME MESSED UP #this was more coherent in my head LOL BUT ough i like drawing p3 and working through my feelings about it... #anyway! happy (in quotations) march 5th. i love this game to bits. it's so fun to draw for this day every year and see how i've improved #if you've read all this thank you :) lizzy appreciates you all very much. mwah! <3

[divorcedfiddleford]

hold shifty gentle like hamburger

#desperately trying to break out of my art block with the guys #anyway happy friday #gravity falls #stanford pines #fiddleford mcgucket #fiddauthor #if u want #i still am disappointed w how the journal handled the shapeshifter. very underwhelming imo #we couldve had a fucked up parental relationship between these guys and their weird homicidal son #or the identity crisis implied by 'am i me? is he me?' #we could've had the thing (1982) but with a much smaller and gayer cast #but instead they just put fiddleford in a box and had him be scared again. lame #artwork of the damned