#anyone know what I mean?

[thatweirdgirlyousatnexttoinmath]

It's been almost five years since The Haunting of Hill House came out on Netflix. And it has irrevocably changed my life.

The depiction of grief. Addiction. Depression. Loss. Identity. Family relationships. Family dynamics. Healing your inner child. Having to deal with your inner child. The fact that in some ways you never really grow up, you're that exact same person inside that is dealing with all these increasingly complex and difficult things, trying hard to not let the child in you react because you know it shouldn't.

Thinking about Theo taking her gloves off. Nell going to therapy, putting in work, and still having her demons chase her around all the way to the end. Shirley's entire life and career being based around wanting to help people in their darkest moments the way someone helped her (though isn't that what they all do, too? Especially Theo). Luke as the youngest, being left behind or not believed and eventually having to find ways to self-soothe, which as an adult are not as health-friendly as other options out there. But it's what he had to do to cope. And Steve... everyone knows a Steve.

I know people have commented before about the five Crain siblings and the five stages of grief. But they also each experience those themselves, and in some ways the five of them simply display how much grief and living can do to a person. Juxtaposing the entire modern part of the series with them as children reminded me how much the things I do now can also be drawn back to little Me. The decisions I make, what scares me, who I reach out to. What haunts me? I may not have a big scary terrifying Death House in my past, but I mean... we've all got our version of a big scary terrifying Death House.

The tragedy of Hill House, the complicated love that's shown, the connections and relationships we have with our families, the world, ourselves. I cannot, will not, should not, would not forget it.

#hill house #haunting of hill house #thohh #the haunting of hill house #steve crain #shirley crain #theo crain #nell crain #luke crain #grief #thoughts #random #family trauma #tv #idk #anyone know what I mean?

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours? #also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that! #unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

[callisteios]

Hi, feel free to take my new uquiz to discover what kind of vampire you are!

#NO IM NOT TALKING ABOUT CHESS THE MUSICAL I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT IS. I AM TALKING ABOUT THE ANCIENT BOARD GAME:CHESS #uquiz #vampires #twilight #because let's be honest there are a fair few references #and maybe this is my twilight quiz which has been in my drafts for nearly a year! #and i was tired of it sitting there #maybe! #quiz #werewolves #mention #you can get human in this im really sorry #it's a bit of a mean result #oh if anyone has an actual picture of the vampire that killed dean winchester please send it along #i could not find it with a cursory google search but i rememeber he wore a clown mask #so maybe one of those guys is the guy?

[bobacupcake]

begging... pleading... for a bigger version of that pikachu gif (if possible), i am so utterly enchanted with it its unreal (i have that exact plush in my house!!!)

#hope this is what u mean #he's carmelas :) though im pretty sure i also had the exact same one ?! #also if anyone wants him transparent im sorry but my transparency machine broke and i dont know why #ask #potion of answers your question #Anonymous

[triptych-of-voids]

quick draw and trigonometry

#SMILES grins #this took me forever to draw.... i mean i started it yesterday but anyway #puts a protractor up to my screen where am i #wanted to do an engie-centric drawing for once #doodles #tf2 #tf2 engineer #tf2 spy #anyone that knows what inspired this gets a kiss on the mouth btw. or something

[hollowboobtheory]

idc if you personally like spiders or reptiles but if someone posts a picture of their snake or tarantula and you reply with a picture of a gun you're a fucking asshole. that's their PET. imagine if you showed someone your cat and they yelled "KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!111!"

#beck rambles #tarantula #looked at the tags of that rancho video to see if anyone else brought up its venom #and i regret it :) #i mean most people were being chill like wow what a blue spider but you know

[captain-flint]

something something Ed not being able to step in to protect Stede from physical and emotional harm out of fear of damaging Stede's reputation and instead letting it play out as he silently falls apart in the background

#our flag means death #ofmd #ofmdedit #ofmd s2 spoilers #edward teach #blackbeard #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #taika waititi #there's an excellent meta on this in my head but unfortunately i don't know how to write #if anyone understands what i mean here please put my thoughts to words #my stuff

[vaguely-concerned]

sometimes I think of all the on-the-surface warm, well-meaning but deeply ineffectual advice and attention john gives harrow through harrow the ninth (make some soup and get some sleep! get a hobby! don't be so hard on yourself! self care harrow! as long as I need take no actual responsibility in this relationship whatsoever I would have loved to be your dad!) set up against the stark truth that with his other hand he has been staging her attempted horrific murder again and again and again like a living nightmare on the logic that it will 'put her down or fix her'. and then I find that I wish there is a hell. a special hell where twitch streamers turned necromantic death emperors go

#the locked tomb #harrowhark nonagesimus #john gaius #harrow the ninth #this is why I don't buy john as misunderstood and initially well-meaning AT ALL #this is a pattern you see with him again and again and again -- right down to his interpersonal relationships #(and indeed it's in the more grounded interpersonal relationships you can most clearly see him as he is I think #the fantasy death empire of a thousand years doesn't register quite as viscerally because it's like. heightened; not quite real #but the emotional violence and manipulation that surrounds him? oh boy that is EXTREMELY real and scarily well-observed) #there's a premeditation to so much of what he does (contracts with planets that only end 'in the event of the emperor's death' anyone? #yeah john we get it you're hilarious and I wish you weren't) #the greatest trick john ever pulled was making anyone think he's just a lil guy. what does he know he's only god #when you first read the book the complete callousness of the other adults is so horrible that john seems like an oasis of care #(though you start to get this uneasy feeling when that care never seems to translate to like... relief or soothing or resolution) #and it makes it feel almost obscene when you find out what's actually going on #it's the mercy & augustine enabler hour but at least they're completely honest in their cruelty there #while john is -- well he sure is being john huh #this is just me being angry with him btw philosophically I don't think this is how the story will or should end #(with john slam dunked right into hell that is) #it's just... harrow is so vulnerable. and what he does to her is so insidious and fucked up #john is very deeply human. unfortunately the capacity to quite simply suck so much is deeply human too

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Average Drama Enjoyer observes some peak drama.

#dungeon meshi #toshiro nakamoto #laios touden #kabru #izutsumi #Before anyone mistakes this as mischaracterization: The joke here is that it's ambiguous what the hell he means. #Kabru does love getting into fights a bit more than average but he's mostly here for the drama. #I screenshot the scene of him going 'The dark arts!' with a little smile everytime I re-read dungeon meshi. He's so catty. I love him. #And shout out to Izutsumi for adding fire to the drama. Girl said 'I am the listener. I heard that shit.' and refused to apologize. #Joke two: the deep cut - Welcome to more propaganda for whatever the hell is going on between Laios & Shuro & Kabru. #Laios trusting Shuro with some *heavy* information because he admires him so much! And wants to be his friend so badly! #Kabru also has another great character moment when he immediatly clocks Laios as not being as malicious as expected. #We love a character who can put the clues together! It is such a good subversion of what role we think Kabru is to play in this story! #Now he's eager to befriend Laios - who is barely interested and currently trying to befriend Shuro - who is barely interested and...well. #The painful triangle of people trying to get to know the other person better and being rejected...Friendship triangle. #We have all had a friendship triangle situation before. Right? You guys have also struggled to read people. Right? #Laios is universally relatable. Right?

[teafromthemicrowave]

flower symbolism my beloved

an entry for lukewarmtomatosoup´s dtiys on instagram (GO CHECK THEIR AWESOME ART OUT), i really like how it turned out so tumblr gets to see it too

#does anyone want to know what these flowers are #their meanings fit jon so well #i researched 2+ hours for that #jonathan sims #tma fanart #the magnus archives #tma

[laurents-secret-diary]

the quirked up white boy Of Vere

#laurent of vere #captive prince #kings rising #prince's gambit #MY PASTY GUY #i know he's supposed to be enchanting or whatever but i need him a bit fucked up you know what i mean #if he is anything like how damen describes him then my dude resembles a victorian child huffing asbestos #“his skin almost indistinguishable from the pristine white shirt he wore” #ok? ok?? MY MAN TAKES BATHS IN THE STYX?? #I just find it soooo funny that this is Damen's ideal man. #this frog ass looking aint shit white boy with the brain processing power of an intel i9 card #i bet his hands are always clammy but noone would know because this dude wont let anyone touch him lol #caprisun

[mistgardens]

Sinclair comes out

#I don't think heathcliff knows what the word gay means he just refuses to lose to anyone on anything #anyways I spent 4 entire days drawing to make this I haven't drawn this much in my entire life #paint tool sai #fanart #project moon #limbus company #lbc #sinclair lbc #sinclair limbus #sinclair limbus company #sinclair #emil sinclair #dante #dante limbus #heathcliff #ryoshu #ishmael #gregor #yi sang #hong lu #faust #don quixote #rodion #rodya #outis #vergilius #meursault #mist gardens trash #mist gardens tag

[vigilskeep]

read my powerpoint boy

#do you love what is going to be the new default microsoft office font. are you excited to be free of calibri #dragon age #it just brings me a lot of joy to write things down neatly but let me know if this is actually useful to anyone LMAO #i love to consult the sacred texts. and notice their terrible obvious mistakes. #not world of thedas writing each age as '1-99' even when that would mean theres only 99 years and 00 dates are referenced in the same book #excited to find out tumblr desktop lets u add 30 images. the powers of the posting bourgeoisie are within my grasp #zevsurana academics

[adriles]

Wow some of you are really mad at me. Probably b/c i maimed & killed your friends, brothers, fathers, and sons on the field of battle. Thats ok though. Im fated to die soon

#book 22 #book 24 #greatest hits #hello?? #why this #new rule for this post #if you tag anyone but achilles #with the exception of cu chulainn or wei wuxian. cause. i mean yeah #i am legally allowed to come to ur house and kill u #i will also make exception for deep myth pulls #if they are cool enough #but yeah. none of u people know what being doomed to die means anymore #macbeth is fine too i guess #grendel addition. im kissing u with great passion. u r so right

[macksartblock]

could you do some gothcleats? pretty please

anyone else haunted by snowballs at school dances? no? just me okay

#i'm aware what time it is but idc i did this while updating baldurs gate lmao #dndads #dungeons and daddies #gothcleats #lincoln li wilson #scary marlowe #one school dance is not enough i know my school had a few a year but i *know* american schools LOVE dances let them be awkward and have fun #norm would be scheming he'd have written their names on that fucking clipboard #he and taylor would bring it right to erica like call em girl please #for anyone who doesnt know what a snowball is this makes no sense but essentially #there'd be two clipboards by the dj: one for music one for names paired together for slow dances #every so often the dj (another student) would slow down the music and call 'snowball' meaning EVERYONE would form a big circle #and the pairs called would move into the centre for the slowdance portion it was MORTIFYING #(this was middle school not high school but still #my artwork

[welcometogrouchland]

[ID in ALT] Steph and Damian doodle! This taps a bit into their pre-52 dynamic so that's what I was thinking design wise at first but I wanted to draw it w their more recent designs as well to stay hashtag current and topical, so you get both/a fusion, lol

#dc comics #dc #batfamily #damian wayne #stephanie brown #tims there too but he's not the focus so i won't clog his tag #for this to be completely in character Damian would have to be much more disinterested in what she's saying #or i mean ACT disinterested in what she's saying. he's very interested in violence done to tim. esp by his favorite weird big sister #THEY (tim n damian) DO NOT HATE EACH OTHER BTW. this is just the cain instinct at work. also admiration for unhinged steph #idk how much of pre-52 is in play rn visa vie steph (i know cass was still discovering her pre52 past in spirit world so...) #but for the sake of this lets say the brick meeting from detective comics og is still valid. bc i love it #steph violent eye-for-an-eye scrapper tendencies and tims insanity (HE'S STILL INTO HER AFTER THIS) on full display #i don't post a lot of dc fanart bc i find them exceedingly difficult to draw (DRAWING SUPERHEROES IS HARD WHEN UR BAD AT ANATOMY) #(ALSO THERE'S NO CONSISTENT FACIAL/HAIR/ETC DESIGN FOR ANYONE) #but i have done a lot of art and now I'm trying to make an effort to post a wee bit more