#anyways it is a joke for some people i know that i am simply Built Different. i think i am just too silly to contain by mortal rules <- | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

beevean · 10 months

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Especially the justifications ranging from "Sonic is neurodivergent-coded" to "Sonic is canonically neurodivergent" in Prime grind my gears. I'm certain many of the same people are gushing about how awesome it is that Sonic Prime is CaNoN tO tHe GaMeS... as in, the games where Sonic:

knew that simply defeating and sealing away Chaos again would do NOTHING except make its hurt and anger only worse.

gave Blaze a kind and supportive pep talk, acknowledging what she had been through because of her pyrokinesis and duties as Sol Emerald Guardian and offering her his friendship with a reminder she can count on the people she's got to know during her adventure.

defeated Merlina but expressed sympathy with her hurt about her world ending while sharing his own philosophy of needing to live life to the fullest, without any call-outs about her attacking him earlier, boasts about defeating her, or scoldings about her negative view on it all.

Immediately came rushing back from Cannon's Core in the ARK even though he was seconds away from foiling the entirety of Eggman's plan with the fake Emerald because Eggman and Tails informed him Amy was in danger.

And those are only the examples I know for certain on the top of my head, without even touching upon everything that happens in games like Sonic Battle and Sonic Forces. It's not even that Prime!Sonic is particularly nasty or rude, he clearly adores his friends, but he can't read a room to save his life and he is legitimately just stupid. Which is clearly done because it can be used to write jokes, but he is stupid, in a way that a properly-written game!Sonic could not be even if he tried. And you mean to tell me the Sonic from the above examples is the occasionally-insensitive constantly-dumb hyperactive chatterbox that Prime presents him as? Please.

(I'm sorry, I figure you might have gotten tired of Prime discourse now, but in general the whole He's Totes Neurodivergent fandom perception annoy me, because they use that card to completely disregard any (in my opinion valid) counterarguments about any poor portrayal...)

Oh wait I forgot to add: the reason I came up with those examples is apparently because people think that Sonic (aka Prime!Sonic) has low empathy. Stolen from some probably-shady and possibly-unreliable site on the internet whose definition of empathy does otherwise seem to check out: "In general, empathy is the ability to understand or sense another person’s perspective, feelings, needs, or intentions, even when you don’t share the same circumstances. It can sometimes involve acting on that understanding, including offering help." And I ask, in what world does Sonic from the games lack empathy?????? He's literally the most empathic pep-talk-giving perspective-seeing help-providing understanding sweetheart on the entire planet with that definition!

I remember reading a post that proposed that Tails had high empathy and Sonic had low empathy, before Prime was a thing. And I had your identical "bruh???????" reaction. Sonic has low empathy? Literally where. Show me proof that any version of Sonic struggles to empathize with people. My man is actually pretty good at understanding others, as you accurately pointed out.

Anyway, I don't have ADHD and even I am getting annoyed at how it's been reduced to "hehe i'm soooooo silly and quirky and kiddy 🤪". If it's not Sonic, then it's characters like Tangle who has pretty much become a womanchild and fans defend her because she's "neurodivergent-coded".

Also, speaking of differences between Prime and Canon Sonic, while the latter was also relatively slow to the uptake to accept that he was not meeting his actual friends in Secret Rings and Black Knight, it was still not as ridiculous as the former, who apparently could not recognize that he was in the third different AU in a row and still was all "oh Tails am I glad to see you!".

And apparently Apple Metal was built to be like Sonic but way more obnoxious about it, which prompts Sonic to say "if I'm half as annoying as you I need to change". Which. *sigh*

and i'm pretty sure there was a boom character like that, but boom apparently sucks ass now while prime is the best western show ever. okay

#sonic the hedgehog #anti prime #you make great points anon and i wish i could elaborate more #but yeah ngl i'm getting too irked at this #not your fault but i feel that i can't talk further without actually watching the show for myself #which i do *not* want to do not even with a friend #so yeah my opinions are not worth much and i'm getting heated up over nothing #i'm this close to muting every sonic tag to take a break

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ryan-nugenthopkins · 5 days

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speak to me about these wips of yours. i've never heard of any of them before and i am simply so very curious

I love you so much Julian mwah

I will not talk about the funny gamer men on here but uh catboy fic (ie My Teammate Turned into a Cat?!) started as "what if Draisaitl turned into a cat sometimes" and has quickly turned into "hey what would the PR and hockey ops response be to a player literally turning into a cat" and also "hey what's the horror of people changing in ways that are unknowable to you" so it's going well! The horrors of bureaucracy, mostly.

Nonetheless here's a TikTok/IG Reel I thought one of the content producers would make as a sick joke a few weeks into the curse manifesting:

The players are walking back to the locker room, still in gear, presumably after a practice. A text caption reading, “If you could be any animal, what animal would you be?” is displayed on the screen as the video rapidly cuts to the players responding, either off the ice or in the locker room.

McLeod grins, looks at the person holding up the phone camera.

“Uh, definitely a dog.”

Nugent-Hopkins looks mildly taken aback but is smiling.

“I’m not sure, actually. Maybe a wolf?”

Someone calls out something unintelligible from off camera. The camera spins and zooms in to catch Hyman laughing.

“I’m not a horse, you —”

Hyman looks thoughtful and affable, as if giving the question serious thought.

“I think I’d be a dog. A Golden Retriever, maybe? They’re pretty smart and loyal.”

Kulak looks mildly amused.

“Some type of dog.”

Holloway laughs loudly.

“I think being a dog would be great.”

Desharnais shrugs, before turning to someone off camera.

“A bear? A bear’s cool, right?”

The response is muffled, but Desharnais laughs anyway and faces the camera again.

“Stu says moose. I’ll go with that.”

Skinner smiles politely at the camera.

“I think I’d like to be a cat. They seem pretty smart and quick.”

McDavid lets out a little media chuckle and runs a hand through his hair.

“Uh… I don’t know. Probably a dog. … What breed? I’m not sure. Maybe I’d just look like Lenny, or something.”

Draisaitl stares at the camera, stone-faced. After a couple of seconds he grits out —

“A cat. I guess.”

Bouch/Clouder Academia AU is basically omg they were roommates doing graduate degrees. It's part of a much broader alternate universe where basically any NHL player that is funny to me is now an academic. I have read so many papers on topics that are not relevant to my own field of study.

Bouch is studying sports medicine as an MSc. He's looking at resiliency and recovery in professional sports and aims to be a physiotherapist after he graduates. He was set to go pro but had a spree of injuries and rough accidents on the ice before and during his stint in the OHL and his drafting prospects plummeted.

Clouder's a PoliSci/Media Studies MA studying how nationalistic narratives are built through sports coverage. He's the only one of three sons that is not playing pro hockey and he has no problems because of it at all :) He's still figuring out what he wants to do with his life.

The fic is mostly following them in their first year at their local university and how they navigate each other and the hockey-related problems they're both dealing with. It went shippy/slowburn "mostly" by accident, but whatever. They'll figure it out eventually. Here's a random snippet:

The holidays seem to have started a pattern. Not enough to be a constant, but enough to know it’s always there, a safety net in the back of his mind. Some days, Ryan will hang up from a family call the day after an impressive game from Michael and there’s a case study that needs to be proofread, immediately; some days, Evan’s gritting his teeth going down the stairwell and it’s easy to duck under his arm, take some pressure off his knee. A scar for a story, one regret for another.

Back and forth, like a passing drill.

It’s not weird, or gay, or whatever bullshit Jungian term Stu is now using for their friendship just because he got caught asking D.R. about painkiller interactions once. It’s open — there’s a comfort there, a familiarity that settles somewhere near Ryan’s sternum and makes it easier to breathe. That’s normal, probably, for a friendship. Quiet reciprocity, which might be the crux of the problem, a fear that he can’t properly describe.

He appreciates those moments where Evan feels comfortable enough to share, to trust in him. Some are easier, a memory of unlucky circumstance with a speedy return. Others — the larger ones, usually, or complications that took him off the ice for months at a time — make it seem like he’d rather pull out his own fingernail than tell. But he does so anyway, stilted and hesitant, and something cold slides down Ryan’s spine every time.

It takes a few more weeks for him to name that feeling guilt, but it’s the closest he’s probably going to get.

#answer #yes everyone understand the depths of my insanity in terms of making things in my aus “practical”

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aseriesofunfortunatejan · 2 years

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I can't import pictures without tumblr giving me the white screen treatment, so I can't even upload the sweet conversation between Akane and Kazuichi I wanted to remind people about.

So I guess I'll mention some of my thoughts by text before I cry and scream into a pillow. I've mentioned it before for Akane, but both she and Kazuichi are severely misrepresented by the fandom. (I feel like that terminology is accurate, but at the same time, please understand that I am also a member of the fandom and am simply making an observation, rather than trying to compare myself to other fans.)

Akane learns so much about herself in Chapter 4. She takes so many steps forward and admits her own weakness. She uses the word "weak" herself, a continuation of what her Coward disease suggested, that she was hiding feelings she perceived as weak. She got stubborn in front of Fuyuhiko, but did a complete 180 when Nekomaru died, recognising immediately that she hadn't shown her gratitude yet. She moved on to trying her best to help with the investigation - something she had already been doing during every investigation, by the way - but this time admitting her own limitations and going out of her way to ask for help in order to get a better result.

And I'll need to write a whole post about Kazuichi someday. Yeah, he has that obnoxious crush on Sonia, I see it, you see it, Sonia sees it, Fuyuhiko hates it too, we know. But Oh My God He Is So Helpful. The cast would have been nothing this entire chapter without his help. Even before that, Kazuichi is more than ready to use his ability and give the entire cast a hand (the communicators he built in Chapter 3 were game changing... literally). Then, something I already posted about, when Nagito pushes him to dismantle Nekomaru's body, Kazuichi fights his formerly debilitating fears and bravely does it. To top it off, he builds Minimaru (who also does massages, very important to Akane...) with the intent to cheer the others up.

"… I made this to cheer you guys up anyway. And…as long as we have it, we won't forget, you know?

About Nekomaru's sacrifice for us…

We're standing here today…because of him.

So, if we're gonna prevent something like that from ever happening again…

I guess we gotta fight too, right!? We can't just keep running away!"

Fuyuhiko himself says: "I gotta admit…I never thought I'd hear you say something that awesome." Of course, Kazuichi follows it up by asking Sonia what she thinks, and she didn't pay attention, and he's upset, to which Fuyuhiko reacts with something along the lines of "and that's the punchline." Yeah, it is. That's the joke-y part that comes after the deep dialogue. I didn't think I was playing some other game.

But I beg that people look into what makes Kazuichi interesting and touching. What matters here is not that his talent does the job - it's that he goes out of his way to use it to help, and with Minimaru, cheer up others. And the other thing that matters is the fears that previously made him look ridiculous, that he learned to face in so little time to become frankly brave and inspiring.... for a guy wearing a bright yellow overall.

Something I'll bring up as a bonus is... When Gundham explains his logic that he didn't think it okay to give up and wait to die, Hajime has a flashback to the time he himself said the contrary, that he'd rather wait to die than cause another murder. But the very line that started that flashback was Kazuichi asking the exact same question as Gundham.

#sdr2 #danganronpa #akane owari #kazuichi soda #kazuichi souda

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thiefking · 9 months

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(ALERT. WARNING. OPINIONS EXPRESSED IN THE FOLLOWING POST ARE NOT MEANT TO INSINUATE I THINK THAT PEOPLE WHO USE TONE TAGS ARE BAD OR HAVE BAD INTENTIONS. I AM SIMPLY POINTING OUT SOME OF MY FRUSTRATIONS WITH THEM AND HOW THEY WORK, OR RATHER DO NOT WORK, IN AN EXAGGERATEDLY ANGRY/LOUD MANNER AT A HYPOTHETICAL SITUATION, NOT A SPECIFIC PERSON OR PERSONS OR INCIDENT, AND IT WASN'T EVEN THE MAIN POINT OF THE POST I WAS ORIGINALLY WRITING WHICH WAS JUST ABOUT SOME ANNOYING OVER-COMMENTED STUFF ON MY POST. ALERT. WARNING)

i am still pleased and amazed at the amount of people on my tone indicator parantheticals post who AREN'T being weird and aggro, but i will say. while i got tired of the aggro ones the moment the first one showed up i have also grown tired of the "this is just tumblr tags/congrats you just reinvented tumblr tags" observation. it has been made many times, i can never tell if it's a teasing joke or if they're seriously like "umm dumbass this is the same thing" (because of course they are not paired with any indication of intent, such as a word encased in a pair of parentheses, because for some reason being overfamiliar with strangers on the internet has become very normalized, and they just expect that if they say things to people they have never met that the person they say that to will be able to tell whether they are kidding or trying to insult them, which is highly variable per person) and either way it's like...

i mean. yeah. on tumblr, that is the same thing as what you could use the tags for

but tumblr isn't a messaging app

even its in-built dms do not have tags

if you are using discord if you type a # it would prompt you to pick a channel you are referring to

The Primary Location You Would Use Tone Indicators Is In Conversation With Others And Tumblr Is Technically A Blogging Platform

also a bunch of people are like "ummm or you could just put it in the SENTENCE like a NORMAL PERSON" and first of all shut up. secondly nowhere in the post did i say that i specifically would rather someone use random parantheticals instead of just stating their intent in the actual sentence, i said i would prefer parantheticals over highly abbreviated tone tags. obviously i would prefer people just say properly what they mean, that is literally what i do when i have a genuine question to ask, i don't do "what do you mean (genuine) (sincere question) (confused)" i say "sorry i'm a little confused, what do you mean by xyz?". literally did not fucking say that i think parantheticals would be better than just saying what you actually mean to begin with IN the initial question. however THIRDLY sometimes you just fucking have adhd or the conversation is fast and you don't think to phrase it carefully. and in that situation you might realize after you already sent the message that it's ambiguous what you meant or if you were sincere, so you send like "(JOKE)" or "genuine question" or if you make a reference "(you know like xyz meme/show/game)" immediately afterwards so people know and can respond appropriately. and i would so much rather see people spell the fucking thing out instead of saying /j or /gen or god forbid /ref (WHAT!!! ARE YOU FUCKING REFERENCING!!! YOU CAN'T JUST SAY IT'S A REFERENCE AND LEAVE IT AT THAT THAT DOESN'T HELP!!! WHY IS THAT EVEN A TONE TAG!!! YOU HAVEN'T GIVEN ME ANY CONTEXT FOR IT, THIS IS NOT A TONE TO INDICATE, IT DOESN'T INDICATE ANYTHING, I COULD PROBABLY TELL FROM THE PHRASING TO BEGIN WITH THAT IT WAS SOME KIND OF REFERENCE ANYWAY, YOU HAVE GIVEN ME ZERO INFORMATION AAUUAUAAAAGGGGHHH the fucking autistic person who would not be able to tell that you were making a reference without the tag would probably also not be able to tell what the goddamn joke was supposed to be! i AM that autistic person sometimes!!! you cannot just /ref your way out of that if you are ACTUALLY TRYING to HELP AUTISTIC PEOPLE then make it clear you can be ASKED TO CLARIFY THINGS and then SUCK IT UP AND EXPLAIN THE JOKE EVEN IF IT MAKES IT LESS FUNNY!!! and this is entirely specific to Me who has never once wanted someone to use tone tags even when i do ask for clarification on something, but if you don't want to ruin your joke by explaining it and i already Understood that it was a joke, the /ref and or /j you put on it is actually. equivalent. to explaining the joke and ruining it...... because in this scenario i knew it was a joke already...)

ahem. anyway. i think the people who say "ummm orrr you could just bake it into the sentence :/" do not realize they are the ones being stupid while calling me stupid. because of the fact that they cannot read the post, where i don't say even once that i don't agree with them, because i am talking about something else, which is that if you gave me a choice between tone tags or tone parantheticals i would choose parantheticals

conversely i'm NOT tired of the elcor comparison, even a little bit, even though that one was also made a thousand times. i actually like that one a lot. i never played mass effect or anything i just think that's funny and cool. entire species that has autism... so beautiful ♡

#txt #got off on a tangent there. i genuinely think /j makes jokes less funny though .#i get it when it's a 'playfully teasing' sitch and you wanna be clear you don't actually mean it #and in fact it makes it funnier when someone says something fuckin NARSTY just FILTHY #and then quickly goes JOKE JOKE JOKE /J desperately afterwards #like 'SORRY THAT CAME INTO MY HEAD AND I HAD TO FUCKING SAY IT. SUFFER WITH ME. GOD I HATE MYSELF'#that's always great cause it's paired with something fucking Insane and it's like you're now trying to convince jigsaw you didn't mean it #but otherwise it's like. i mean yeah. i knew that was a joke cause of the way you typed it and the words you used...#if i couldn't tell it was a joke based on the statement i would not be able to tell what was supposed to be funny anyway...#i am still gonna have to ask for clarification even if you put a /j on it in that instance....#no amount of parantheticals will fix that one either. it is unfixable without fully explaining the joke. you just gotta deal with it #anyway. wat ever

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drifting-pieces-blog-blog · 2 years

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MUSIC! Part two.

Who has an earworm? I’ve a whole colony of them constantly screaming the Moon Knight soundtrack at me at all hours nonstop.

EPISODE 2! There wasn’t a lot of music in this one. Not outright themes anyways. As an episode that was mostly just to move the characters physically and mentally to where they needed to be, it was dependent on the original background music. Re-exploring Harrow’s theme a lot too. Which in my mind sounds like a swinging cane or pendulum that is off balance. It also first introduces very very briefly the madness theme that plays heavily in episode 5. But let us look at what they did give us.

Episode 2 Song list:

Bela Lugosi's Dead - Bauhaus

Wael El Fashny

El Melouk (feat. 3enba & Double Zuksh) – Ahmed Saad

The opening of episode two was so off guard. No music to open. Just the sounds of the Jackal getting his ass beat by Marc. Props to the sound team on this one!

"Bela Lugosi's Dead" - Bauhaus

OKAY. I thought this was a joke at first. And MAYBE IT IS. Bela Lugosi. The man that played the most famous version of Dracula. I think we all know about Moon Knight and his grudge against Dracula...

The song plays briefly when Steven is looking for Marc’s secret storage unit. There is no way this wasn’t picked for the laughs and I appreciate this. We already know that Oscar Issac likes memes and vines.

We also get a re-emergence of themes here. Bob Dylan briefly returns as Harrow shows Steven his community that he built, much like a cult leader.

We also get to hear the moon knight theme as well, mixed in with the fighting theme. It’s stronger this time. There is more to show us. We get to see him fight and we get to see Marc’s first full emergence. We also get to see Marc’s first failure and how it affects him.

The music tells the story, less in the background than it was in the first episode. Which leads me to this man:

Wael El Fashny

Wael El Fashny is the man behind that SOUND.

The song is Estaweet. Mixed in with the original music it blends so well and makes you FEEL the big reveal as Marc throws back the curtian to reveal our first look at Cairo and the pyramids. You hear bits of this all over the place but Maaaannnn what a voice. What a sound! Go listen to his stuff. Right now. I'll wait.

The genius of this composer is taking older songs, classic Arabic songs that were big and had history or culture and pulling them into his more modern composing. Taking trap songs and remixes of these songs. It pulls people in and connects them.

Estaweet, I am not going provide a translation for this one. I could not find a good one. The gist of it is: "My dear nights. My heart has been filled with pain, my only drink is regret." And it's about being apart from your love. But we hear his voice swell as we see Marc drunk in his regrets and pain.

This directly falls into our first big end credit song. Again, I love how this show doesn’t give you standard rules. Are you going to get a theme song opener? Who knows. Are you going to get a new song every credit? Yes. Sometimes you get two end credit songs.

This time we get this banger of an end credit song. Which has them all returning to Cairo to get shit done so thematically, it really works. As Marc’s first real episode it also really works.

El Melouk (feat. 3enba & Double Zuksh) – Ahmed Saad

I like to listen to this song a lot. It’s peppy. It’s Arabic. It’s a jam. Rough translation:

[Enaba]

I don't see y'all

You're some kids living on chasing girls

Every one knows your little worth

Everyone knows I'm bold/aggressive

I've never needed anyone

Not an exaggeration I swear

I Stand like a Lion amidst everyone

I was not raised to be mean

In execution I got rocket

I'm enab( grapes/ the meaning of the singer’s name ) from Mars my dude

In the middle of my wars I shoot missiles

In the middle of my country I am writing myself a history

[Zuka]

Habeby (Darling)

Baba , wе've arrived like a gang

Wе lived simply

You will make it if you have the will

I haven't asked for help I stood alone

Numbers calling on the phone

They loved me when I reached the top they started acting different

Your ball misses my ball scores

[Ahmed Saad]

Silence Silence Silence Silence

The Kings have arrived

There's no escape, from the Lions

We aren’t selling words

We're straightforward and upfront

Doesn't bother me who says a thing

The haters don’t belong here

[Young Zuksh]

You mess with me you'll see madness and neighbors will be showing up

God gave me wisdom in tongue, I eat yall with words

Young "Zuksh" came from Al-Salam, your brother is hazardous

I'm straight up and okay, so don't call me "my man"

I won every trophy

I put the poison in bottles

I served everyone who wanted some

I want what I want

I want you to understand and see what's good

[Ahmed Saad]

Look where were we

And where are we now

Those who forgot me in two days

L'll forget you for years"

Thanks to the conditions

That made me see the true nature of People whom I loved truly

And other people who should not be seen

[Enaba]

When I came everyone disappeared

It’s outta my hand, I'm a blast

It's difficult to see you from space

If you show up l'Il deal with you

Get away from me because l'm mean

From Cairo and better than the western

Your planet is different from my planet

By myself I can lead Tatar

[Young Zuksh]

I'm hot i'm hot i'm cheque

A car will get you anywhere if you got the money

It's known, Don't hang with silly friends my dude

We got you if you know loyalty

You'll be up (be up)

Even If my hair turns gray

We'll continue to the last day

Success is tough you can't be sleeping

Honestly, I see this song choice as more Marc than anything. Episode one was all about Steven, I think this one shows more Marc. You be the judge of that.

Go listen to the music! Explore the artists! Find more to love!

#Moon Knight #Moon Knight meta #Moon Knight music #I'm honestly just eager to get to episode 3 because daaammmn #Love finding out more about the older artists though #that man can sing

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maureen-corpse · 1 year

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So, I'm going to confess to having tried looking at YouTube shorts several times recently. It gives me what I assume to be something like the Tiktok experience without the ordeal of having to actually be on Tiktok. Here's what I have observed so far:

So few people have any comedic timing. These videos are like forty-five seconds long and I wait for all of that time for the joke and it's not funny. When Vine died society lost.

The loops don't work most of the time. I assume people are making perfect loops on Tiktok or something and then uploading the same video to YouTube and it's just not working. Looping isn't important. Stop trying it.

I don't feel the urge to subscribe to any of these people. If I do see a video that seems like the person might make content I might want to see more of, YouTube makes it way more difficult than it should be for me to simply go to that person's channel and find their content. I'm not going to follow someone based on one or two shorts, and I'm also not writing down names. Since I go to YouTube to watch videos by the people I subscribe to, if I followed a dedicated Shorts creator I would end up adding a bunch of Shorts to my watch later list and then...watching them later, which is a little nuts. I already do that with the Shorts from the channels I already watch, though I sometimes move all the Shorts in my WL list around so I watch several at once.

Another issue, though, is that Shorts, being up to a minute long, can be a time investment, even if they are short! The titles don't always tell you much (like "Should I even bother to watch this?") and you'd think it's easier to just watch this thirty-second video and move on, but...well, if you have five of those in your subscriptions, that's two and a half minutes, which is the length of a video I would have simply saved for later.

I feel like I have some criticism for short-form educational videos but also I feel like I haven't seen enough of them. I think usually they start off in a very annoying way that doesn't grab me so I scroll past them, and even then, I've only seen a few, aside from the ones associated with the educational channels I already follow, which I'm more inclined to watch because the hosts have built up some trust with me.

What is up with the transphobia? I don't interact with transphobic content. My initial theory was that some of channels I subscribe to for things like woodworking are also viewed by people who love Traditional Gender Roles and Power Tools and Masculinity or whatever (I just think it's fun to watch people make stuff but everyone is different! Some people suck!) but a little searching has shown that other people have found an unusual amount of transphobia shown to them by the YouTube Shorts algorithm, and it sounds like even more than I've seen. I tell it not to recommend these channels to me, but I wish there was something more forceful that would make me believe I was actually going to be avoiding this channel. A dislike is still engagement, so you can't put one of those on a bad video. And dislikes are no longer visible, anyway.

Actually, the UI on Shorts is annoying. What do those icons mean. What is the name of the video. Who is this. I remember rotary phones (there's a rotary phone in my house (it's not plugged in though)) and I am entitled to financial compensation for this I think.

People who don't know what "POV" means are on YouTube now.

It's so easy to scroll. If you see a video that doesn't grab you, it's so easy to keep on moving. Try the next one, then the next one, then the next one. And at the same time, most of the content is unappealing!

People who post two-parters are my enemy. I'm not going to subscribe to your channel just to see the result of your experiment or to see you cut the soap you made. Even if I did, how am I supposed to find part two? The short I'm viewing could be from last week and you might have posted part two at any point between then and now among all your other stupid little videos. Do you Tiktok people really live like this? Hoping you see part twos on your for you page? Or something? Does YouTube have a subscription page specifically for shorts so you can see part five of someone's boring story about what if your soulmate's name started appearing on your chin one letter at a time for every time you robbed a bank?

#long post #youtube shorts #sorry guys i just wanted to complain

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hologramcowboy · 2 years

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I think the reason why I became more Jared leaning is when I learnt Jensen cheated on his best friend Ryan with Danneel. Danneel was Ryan's girlfriend they were almost engaged. Ryan's mom was casting agent and was handling Ryan, D, Jen ans few other friends account. In one of the interview Jensen revealed that Jen and D fell in love with each other during Ten Inch Hero. It was the time she was still dating Ryan. Later in an interview Ryan revealed that he felt used by his best friend and girlfriend. D was in relationship with Ryan when she was hooking up with Jensen. Ryan said that he felt they stayed with him coz his mom was an agent.

This interview of Ryan made me realise that Jensen is not all what he seems? He builds himself on others and then tries to seem like some great guy who is doing sacrifices. Time and again Jensen has shown his jealous side all you have to do is look without Jensen is awesome goggles. The YANA, Nerd HQ or the latest Prequel Gate are the main examples. The way he dissed Gen and her support to Jared is another example of him being jealous. You could see he dont like when Jared hypes Gen or talk about her. He tries to joke about it but he doesn't like when the con is filled with Jared leaning fans and when the said fans buy gifts for Jared. He would always pass comments on it whereas he is perfectly fine when fans hype him and diss Jared.

Like Misha, even he got inflated ego but he know how to hide it. He tries to show that he is private but he craves attention that is why he tries to gain sympathy. He is not the only actor who stay away from home and his kids for movies and series.

I dont understand what false narrative he is talking about, the only speculation I have seen about The Rust movie is on Alec I doubt anyone have speculated or even mentioned Jensen after the incident. If people are speculating your divorce then either make the record straight or ignore it. Why get testy about it and complain to others, ignore it after all they are just speculations?

Yes, very few people acknowledge what went down with Riley/his mom/Danneel and Jensen and his GF at the time which he cheated on with Danneel while also cheating Riley who was Danneel's fiancee and soon to be married to her. If you are going to say a couple is couple goals then be honest about their origin otherwise you don't truly love them, you love the fake image they built to seem like this special romantic love story that no one ever bought anyway because you don't have the charisma or chemistry for it and you built a foundation on lies and cheating. I too felt that Cliff post was over the top and famewhoring perhaps out of jealousy the Padalecki's were getting more press. I am a Jensen fan and yet I can acknowledge this so why can't others? It's absolutely normal for Actors to feel not only in competition but jealous of each other. The industry is build around that. At the core, everyone is in competition with everyone. Especially two potential leading men. So thinking that Jensen is this perfect God that has no feelings is just...Think again, he is human. Even his comment about an actor's desperation were underhanded comments towards some of his peers and a way of saying "I don't need to do that because I am Jensen". It's his ego but it's also the need to position himself in a highly competitive environment and the lack of knowledge to do so therefore resorting to not so cute comments which end up antagonizing his peers. Why does he need to throw shade at anyone? Nobody is stealing his spotlight anytime soon. I agree, if he disliked the rumors at the time it would have been enough to simply respond professionally no need to attack his very own fanbase. I have no doubt some people are cray cray but he can just block them when they tweet without alienating the rest of his fans.

#anti jenneel #anti danneel

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utilitycaster · 3 years

Text

Wizard breakdown tracker week 2: episode 132

Welcome again to the post in which I assess how close the various wizard NPCs of Exandria are to Losing It, an exercise in reminding me that though things may seem dark now, one day Trent Ikithon will be brought to justice, which is the fun euphemism I have for “zero hit points and also on fire”.

I suspect we’re really only going to see Essek for a while such that this may eventually become a space for real thoughts on Essek, wildly speculative thoughts on the volstrucker wizards, Allura/Kima domestic fluff, and elaborate jokes about Eadwulf’s name and Yussa’s predicament, but I am committed.

As a reminder: Caleb Widogast is not eligible due to being a PC. Wizard NPCs for whom I have no updates, whether it’s because they have not appeared recently or simply because I don’t find them interesting enough; my deepest apologies to the Oremid Hass stans.

Someone in my notes from last week’s post asked where Known Gem Wizard Hotsauce Lutefisk was. The answer is that he is in a gem. Hope this helps.

Archmage of Antiquities Lady Vess DeRogna is still dead.

Ludinus Da’leth: with Yussa (hopefully temporarily) out of the running he’s suddenly feeling more confident in his chances at winning Wildemount’s Least Fucks Given competition but doesn’t know why, and with Jester in the north a sudden sense of peace has come upon him.

Conclusion: 0/10. He’s taking a nap in his tower in a sunbeam like an evil cat as we speak.

Trent Ikithon: It’s only been a day or so since Caleb delivered what is truly probably the sickest burn he’s ever experienced; this man probably doesn’t care about 99% of what people say to him but Caleb saying he’s not the biggest thing on his mind? That’s gonna hit. Also presumably the trail went cold after Nicodranas, in more ways than one.

Conclusion: 5/10 and simmering; by the time the Nein return to civilization he should be about ready to explode.

Essek Thelyss: While it’s only been a few hours honestly I think he’s already doing better. He’s in a weird freezing ruin and there was a fight with another one coming, but he’s being useful! He’s been given trust and friends! He got to show off a lot of very cool spellcasting! Also have you ever been super anxious and your friends, rather than trying to talk through anything, are just incredibly fucking weird to the point where it takes your mind off things because what is happening even? That’s the mood. Oh and also, he may still be worried about the Assembly bearing down on him but I have to imagine Yasha’s display of swordcraft is helping.

Conclusion: 7/10. To paraphrase Caduceus there’s a certain baseline of happiness when you’re in a freezing ruin full of brown mold, but the distraction is welcome.

Astrid Beck: It’s tough that she’s offscreen because like, her mental state is going to be governed heavily by Trent’s but specifically if he seems on to her. Also while my bets are against the volstrucker trying to teleport into the ruins of Aeor she’s probably going to be in a worse state if she might have to face Caleb again.

Conclusion: holding at 8/10 until further notice.

*Black Francis voice* I believe in Mr. Eadwulf Grieve: *sits backwards on chair* Look, son/daughter/child, we all at some point in our lives project a lot of things on to a mysterious but intriguing NPC. Your Verins; your Urayas; your Vandrans. Mine? Well, mine is a wizard whose name we don’t entirely know how to spell and who we mostly know is strong and likes the Raven Queen and was not exactly the third wheel we long believed him to be. Anyway, I like to imagine Eadwulf as a calming presence, with Astrid the more-high-strung leader, albeit calming presence because he immediately gets drunk after stressful situations.

Conclusion: I’m going to say 4/10. I think he’s one of those people who’s like, super smart but also when the problem is not directly in front of him he’s like well nothing to be done now.

Pumat Sol: Much as I love him, no updates for now and he will probably be moved to the “not recently seen” group. I hope a heavily disguised Yeza has stopped by though for more top toys after one of the mobsters got really into it.

Conclusion: 1/10, respectfully.

Allura Vyesoren: She is assuming at this point no news is good news, which will change after a few days, but also Lady Kima keeps busting in with a sword the size of herself yelling “I JUDGE THEE, MAGICIAN”

Conclusion: holding at 3/10.

Yussa Errenis: WE BUILT THIS CITY! WE BUILT THIS CITY ON WIZARD’S SOULS!

Congrats on the gender, sorry about...you know.

Conclusion: to ℵ-null and ℵ-null and beyond/10. In related news I am submitting a bug reports to both Tumblr and Google Docs for not accounting for the outlier formatting case of Cardinality Georg.

#as mentioned elsewhere nothing is funnier than just calling Ikithon Tront #but puns on other wizards' names are very funny #critical role #critical role spoilers #wizard breakdown tracker #your music references this week were Mr. Grieves by the Pixies and We Built This City by Jefferson Starship

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tonguetiedraven · 2 years

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Could you do a Yukio/Shima story...Yukio comes out as Demi-sexual to Shima (idk if you've done that already)

For some reason I keep thinking that the back painting thing (in a nonsexual way) could be nice

I'm not sure if this is exactly what you were wanting, but I had a lot of fun with the prompt ^^

— — — — —

They’re on the roof when Yukio mumbles the words like they’re a confession, and in a way, Renzou supposes they are. They’re an explanation at least. A sort of sorry for not explaining earlier. Sorry for not letting you near. Sorry for letting you think it was you. That you weren’t enough.

“I found the word for it.”

“Yeah?” Renzou asks, because it’s the thing to do and honestly, Yukio never talks about himself. Learning about Yukio is always something to hop on. (Especially if you don’t want a wild Rin materializing out of thin air and kicking your ass for giving his brother a reason to shut down again.)

Yukio nods and fiddles with the sleeve of his sweater. It’s a thinner one than he usually wears. Renzou knew the chill was part of depression, more than just being cold natured. He’s watched ever since that realization, gaging how many layers Yukio is in. It’s the first time he’s ever watched someone’s clothes in a non sexual way. It’s just concern. Just a way to gauge how his friend is doing.

(And yeah, some day he hopes to see a bit of skin.)

More than any of that though, Yukio fiddling with his sleeve is a sign of nervousness. It’s annoyance if he’s messing with his glasses, but his sleeves indicate a scared and uncomfortable sort of feeling. That gets Renzou to sit a bit straighter and really pay attention.

“For myself,” Yukio clarifies. “What I am.”

“Yeah?” Renzou asks again.

“I… Demisexual. Shura sent me some information on it.”

Demisexual? Renzou isn’t positive what that is, but he wants to say he’s heard it before. He wants to say he heard Mamushi mention it, but he makes it a point to avoid any kind of sex talk with people back in Kyoto. They’re all too close to siblings and it’s all enough to make him shudder. Ugh.

“Yeah? What’s that?” He knows he falls somewhere in the bi or pan spectrum. He finds everything attractive. (Except the people in Kyoto, because again, siblings, and shudder.) There are so many beautiful and interesting people and he wants to try it all.

(Including the adorable and freckled boy beside him.)

“A person who… basically, in order to feel attraction, I need… I have to already have a strong bond with them. I don’t just look at people and want them.” There’s a silent ‘like you’ that Yukio is now too kind to say, but Renzou hears anyway.

Renzou raises a teasing eyebrow and smirks. “Is this your way of coming on to me?”

Yukio rolls his eyes, but there’s a blush on his cheeks that Renzou could happily kiss. “No, spy boy. It’s my way of explaining why I was always so…”

“Prudish.”

“Resistant,” Yukio counters with a stern look. He’s relaxed though. The earlier tension is gone. His hands are hanging loosely now, no longer tangled in his sleeves or hem.

“Knew there had to be a reason you didn’t succumb to my charms.” Renzou winks again, grin growing at the eyeroll it earns him. He could thank Yukio for telling him, and he might someday, but that isn’t quite who he is. That’s something the others would do, thank him for the trust, but he’s someone dangerous to trust, and even with Yukio he can’t quite let his guard down enough to thank someone when it’s given. Not when he remembers all too well how easy it is to make everyone look at you like you being in the room is a dangerous thing.

He simply smiles and leans back on his hands to watch the sunsetting in front of him and tries not to wonder if they’ve built a bond yet. If there will be a day when Yukio says yes.

What they have is already pretty great. He could be happy with this. He is happy with this.

— — — — —

Knowing doesn’t actually change anything. He could make it into jokes, but they’d fall flat. He just makes a few vague comments when the Valentine letters pick up, and a few jokes when the spring fever strikes and there seem to be hourly rejections in the hall.

Mostly, he just offers Yukio a secret smile and feels a warmth that he knows something.

They’re on the beach for a mission, something Lightning and Shura had rambled about that Bon and Konekomaru had taken notes for, and he’s on watch duty. Watch duty that basically consists of sitting in one spot for a very long time and staring at the water. It’s an improvement from the kraken, and a huge improvement from Tsubaki’s squid stand.

Yukio is stretched out next to him. He’s going to have the next shift, and Renzou has been slowly inching his hand over to Yukio’s back. He has moles there, just a few, but they’re like a little constellation on his tanned skin and Renzou wants to trace them out. He knows Yukio hates them with a fervent passion, but Renzou likes them. They’re distinctly Yukio and they’re something he enjoys tracing with his eyes.

When Yukio doesn’t immediately flinch away from his touch (like he once might have) he lets himself be a little bolder and spreads his entire hand against the upper middle of Yukio’s back. Spreading his fingers between the wings of his shoulder blades and pressing his palm gently against the skin. It’s not surprising to see the tension in Yukio’s body, but it is surprising that he’s not the reason it’s there.

“You sore?” He asks absently, remembering a younger Bon who always over did it and Torako gently working the knots out of his neck and shoulders to help fight off the migraines.

“No?” Yukio mutters into his towel, refusing to open his eyes. Renzou admires that ridiculous stubbornness that even makes it work to relax. It’s hilarious to watch.

“Well you’re tense.” Without really thinking about it he slides his hand a bit higher and lets his other one join it. It’s easy to work out the first knot he finds, and the way Yukio, at first stiff, goes all lax under his touch as the muscles are worked out.

(It’s trust, again, and he doesn’t think about how it makes him warm that Yukio’s eyes stay closed because he knows it’s Renzou who is doing it and knows he’s safe.)

— — — — —

Turns out, Renzou likes touching Yukio’s back. It’s a nice back, soft, smooth, a few scars (someday he’ll ask about those) and heavily freckled.

More surprisingly, Renzou is allowed to touch Yukio’s back. Like regularly, and without much of an excuse needed. To the point where Yukio will even sit in front of him when they’re just talking, and shrug off the outermost layer (the boy always has an undershirt on, no matter the weather) and Renzou will take it for the cue it is and trace circles or lines or silly patterns into Yukio’s shoulders and back through whatever fabric is still blocking him.

The others notice, but aside from a few raised eyebrows, don’t actively say anything. They all mostly assume Renzou and Yukio have a few weird and unspoken habits together from their ‘Illuminati time’ (or *‘Illumi-naughty time’, as Rin loves to call it.) But the fact that Renzou is allowed to do it in front of others is a huge thing, and the warmth it makes him feel each time isn’t something he’d even try to put into words. Things that big and essential weren’t made for words.

It’s a spur of the moment thing (like most decisions in his life) to buy the paints when he sees them. He gets them home and immediately realizes it’s a weird thing to ask, and that in and of itself is weird. That something being awkward to ask would make him hesitate to do it. But…

But this is Yukio, and the trust he’s earned is something that’s important, and he doesn’t know who all knows, but he knows he does, and he doesn’t want Yukio thinking it’s a bid for more. He’d love more (because Yukio is sinfully gorgeous, and a pretty damn great person) but that isn’t what it’s about.

So they sit in his room for a few weeks, until he realizes the things have expiration dates and then he panics and just blurts the question out.

“Can I paint you?”

Yukio blinks over his ramen for a moment before he finishes slurping them up. Then, dabbing neatly at his mouth, he straightens. “Sure? I didn’t know you were into art?”

“No. Not paint a portrait. I wanna paint on you. Your back? Saw a thing and thought it looked like fun.”

A plus work there. If he wanted to sound weird, he certainly accomplished it.

Yukio snorted and shook his head. “Paint on me?”

“Yeah. Your back. It’s supposed to feel nice too.” He adds without really knowing why. It still sounds pervy even though, for once, he really didn’t mean it that way.

Thankfully the last year has not only been about him learning who Yukio is, but Yukio learning who he is, because he studies Renzou face for a moment, then, casually as anything, nods and picks his chopsticks back up. “Sure. Just make sure they’re skin safe. If you give me a rash, I’m giving you extra homework.”

“Fair.” Renzou returns to his own noodles and thinks of Yukio’s back. He knows just what he wants to paint on him.

It’s not an immediate thing, their lives are woefully busy, but it doesn’t take too long before Yukio lets him know that there’s a free evening and Renzou is popping over to the twins’ probably haunted dorm with his paints. Rin is sprawled out on his bed reading his manga and waves as he comes in. Yukio is sitting neatly at his desk, grading tests (hopefully on a curve) and smiles when he enters. He rises from the desk without Renzou having to ask, and spreads out on a towel on the floor. He rests his chin on his arm, and it strikes Renzou that Yukio really is beautiful.

Thoughts like that will definitely stop this, so he shoves them down, smiles, and plops next to Yukio.

Rin is watching them like the curious cat he secretly is, and doing a horrible job at pretending he isn’t.

Renzou sets his supplies out in a neat row and dips in blue first. He gets Yukio talking about his day without too much effort, and lets himself get lost in the repetitive motions of his paint brush. Up and down, over and over, until Yukio’s entire back is blue. Then a bit of black, swirled, some purple, a little less swirled and a bit more side to side, and before he really notices, they’ve both gone quiet.

It’s almost meditative, which is weird because Renzou hates meditation. He hates focusing on something as dull as a few words or as normal as his breathing. But this… This simple motion and spreading the paint around Yukio’s back, watching his friend relax under him and lull into a place that isn’t quite sleep, but is vulnerable and trusting…

He can almost see why Bon and Koneko spend so much time doing it.

The stars are last, and he laments a little when he starts on them. They’re fun to map out, but they also mean this thing is ending, and that’s sad when it’s so peaceful. It’s not as good as something Bon might make, but it’s obviously a starry sky, and he’s pretty sure Yukio will know the constellation and probably be annoyed by it, but it’s still what Renzou imagines every time he touches Yukio’s back.

“That looks so cool!” Rin gushes, sitting up on the bed, manga forgotten at his side. Renzou glances at him, having forgotten he was there, and immediately knows that his friends are going to be pulled into this thing.

That’s okay. They can go wild with it. Renzou’s happy with this.

Yukio’s eyes blink open and his head tilts a little towards Renzou. “Is it finished?”

Renzou nods, voice a little thick with how soft Yukio sounds, and how peaceful he looks. It’s nothing like the boy who had stood on the Illuminati ship, ready to die.

He doesn’t know where that thought came from and he forcibly shoves it away. This Yukio isn’t like that, and Renzou won’t let him get there again.

It’s maybe five minutes before Rin is running out to the store to get his own paints, and Renzou is taking a careful picture to show Yukio his masterpiece. (And part of him is tempted to sign it, but that feels weird and while the idea of his name on Yukio is incredible, just his art is enough for now. Maybe someday.)

Yukio rolls his eyes at the constellation, but there’s a light blush on his freckled cheeks and a small smile pulling at his lips that he can’t quite hide.

Someday, Renzou thinks.

— — — — —

(Someday happens on the roof, just like the other confession had, and Renzou decides that roof is his new favorite spot.)

— — — — —

*This was a spur of the moment joke I came up with and I love it.

Thanks for reading! And thank you to Anon for the prompt/ask <3

#yukishima #ao no exorcist #blue exorcist #my tumblr fics #renzou shima #yukio okumura #renzo shima #okumura yukio #shima renzou #yukio x renzou

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lokislittlesigyn · 2 years

Text

a personal post

((literally just a post about me as a person you do not have to engage with this if you don’t want to lol))

helloooooooooo

so the month is almost over, but after seeing a friend reblog some stuff about this and then reblogging it myself, i sort of got the Final Push to draw this and post this and i’m trying to be brave. :’D

so. april is autism acceptance month some people say “autism awareness” and while awareness is also important i like acceptance a bit more and i wanted to just. let y’all know! i am autistic!! hi!! it’s me!!!!

last year i went from not knowing what autism entailed to being diagnosed with it in the span of a few months. it was a wild ride. it’s taken me months to be able to Resist my deep-seated anxieties about “what if i gave a false positive without realizing it???” and try to embrace myself post-diagnosis. its been a little scary... most of the stuff id heard about autism beforehand was cruel, dehumanizing jokes, and truth be told, im still afraid people will mistreat me if/when they find out im autistic (just yesterday i told someone and i was literally shaking afterward), but i am trying to be brave anyway.

there is nothing wrong with being autistic, or having other kinds of neurodivergencies. this goes for any neurodivergency. we are not something to be cured or culled, we possess different kind of brain and these differences are beautiful. it can be hard because our world often isnt built for people who aren’t neurotypical, but that is reason for striving to do better for everyone.

this isn’t really going to change my content - although i have wondered if i write fics differently from others, or if i have accidentally slipped autism-esque mannerisms into fics... hmm... - everything ive made has been mine, and everything i make will continue to be mine. i just know a bit more about myself now, and im trying to accept and express myself more and more. but this blog has already helped me start that, tbh. marvel and loki Specifically is ABSOLUTELY a huge special interest of mine. can you tell loki is one of my special interests???? can you tell i love him so so so much and want to give him the world??? well i do. he’s the absolute best.

i also wanted to tell people as a way to boost my confidence and give others, who may feel alienated, misunderstood, or broken, a possible help somehow. if it wasnt for the therapists who helped me, i would probably still think i’m an unintelligent, strange, over-sensitive, takes-things-too-seriously weirdo who will simply never fit in and who will never feel truly safe with anyone. so if i can mention something that piques one’s curiosity, and potentially leads them to a helpful diagnosis? that’s worth it.

if you have any autistic friends, maybe take some time to talk to them and ask them if there’s a way you can support them! i also suggest just, reaching out to friends in general. go talk to someone. be kind to someone. ask about them and listen attentively. be good to one another, okay? and be good to yourself. <3

#personal #woah im a person??? wild #autism acceptence month #autism #asd #actually autistic #neurodivergent #neurodivergency #<3 #sigyn is trying to be brave!!!#is it working?

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rotshop · 3 years

Text

hello welcome to another half baked idea, this time i am listening to the off soundtrack and crave nothing but misery and suffering

please ignore how pretentious this whole thing sound it just happens whenever i try and put meaning to words !!

tw ; talk of death, some self loathing, general mental unwellness, and brief talk of blood

---

Phobos always knew this was coming. He always knew one way or another this day would come along and he would have to greet it with his head held high. He was so acutely and painfully aware of it ; nights spent mentally preparing and wondering about how he'd busy himself afterwards. Time spent on his lonesome with an unfocused gaze as he lost himself in the tangles of his own mind and questions that -despite his efforts- would never receive a real answer.

A part of him turned their head up and sneered as the depths crawled up his limbs in waves. They bared their teeth in a grin, remarking how he should've known, he should've known that as a god he'd face this emptiness one way or another. He should've known that he was best on his own, tainting and souring himself when he'd grabbed and held onto you for something.

Part of him looks back on those memories with bitterness and anger, mocking his past self for having held onto some mere mortal with such desperation. Mocking him for having held onto you as though you weren't dust in the start and wouldn't be dust in the end. It claws and screams and bites endlessly like a trapped animal, vaguely hoping for release in the form of the void or freedom. All those regrets tangled together in sharpened thorny bushels, writhing and lashing in anguish.

Another part of him admits that you weren't just some other person, admits that you were a tether to reality for him and a shoulder to lean on. It admits that there's so many words he wish he'd spoken clearly when you'd looked to him with energy in your eyes and the light casting a halo around your figure rather than whispering them in the dark of night when you were resting. It admits that he wishes he'd pressed his lips to yours more when they'd perked up and smiled at him. It admits that you made him feel like more than a caricature of a man and a vague shadow that dragged along with no object to cast it. All these regrets wrap around and grasp tightly onto him, pulling him down further into an unsure sea of white noise.

He just wishes he'd said more then rather than now where it all hangs behind his teeth and makes his tongue feel like lead. He just wishes he'd done more, fulfilled some of those promises and plans he'd carefully crafted with you. Those same plans all crumble into heaps around him now, while he would've snapped to fix them, attempt to hold them up on shaky legs back then he's found a sick contentment in sitting and watching quietly. He doesn't make move to salvage what's long gone, instead, he just stays quiet with straightened posture falling and lets himself fall apart along-side them.

He can still remember it all so vividly, the memory hanging over and resting its head on his shoulder to whisper to him when his mind goes blank once more. He remembers you'd been separated briefly, sending each other a brief glance before you'd parted paths. You'd rushed off to go deal with a few out-of-order grunts while he'd made haste to go deal with an uncontrolled mag. He'd never enjoyed fighting unless he absolutely needed to, perhaps that's why he was drawn to you.

You were fiery and quick on the draw, you'd impressed him with your raw talent and skill. He'd always enjoyed watching you fight, eyes watching every movement you'd make carefully. You were well taught, you'd even shown him a thing or two (he's sure he tried to insist he didn't need help at first before he'd fallen into it, listening intently as you showed him how to do something). He trusted you could handle it on your own, you trusted him he could handle this on his own.

He remembers catching his breath and hastily wiping the blood off his hands as best as he could at that moment. The sound of his heels clicking on the tile as he headed back to the direction you'd gone off in. He was too set on checking up on you (though -he winces- he never would confess that to you, that he sincerely worried about you) to notice the way a few stray agents warily looked away from him. He didn't even notice how quiet it was, brushing off the distant ringing in his ears as nothing more than a side effect from the loud roaring of that old mag.

He remembers looking up in a bit of confusion when you hadn't responded to his question- it was something dumb, some half-baked joke he'd expected some witty response to. You were always clever, at first his pride had hated how well you were at holding an argument with him, your power over him. Over time though, he'd grown fond of it, chuckling under his breath as he imagined little responses you'd make to little questions on his mind. He remembers looking up and feeling that confusion, then feeling nothing at all.

It took a moment or two for him to really process much of anything at all, the scene a blurred mess before him. That part..he can't remember very well. All he remembers is red smeared about the room, him walking forward, and then your weight. His minds eye seems to regain his vision as he's walking again, heels clicking on tile with the occasional drip of something falling beside it. He can feel your weight against his chest, almost perfectly mirrored by the weight that rests on it as he stares at the ceiling.

He recalls vaguely how numb it all felt, he carried you off to a medical station for..some reason. He knew there was no point, your pulse was long gone and your body was creeping with cold already. Yet he'd done it anyway, out of some fleeting hope or simple desperation he wasn't sure. All he knows is the way people viewed the sight of him holding your lifeless corpse in his arm and shied away, turning their gaze. He could barely hear what one doctor had said to him, something about how they would see what they could do.

Humiliation crawls up his throat as he thinks about it. Pity. Everyone in that room filled the air with pity over him, both refusing to look in his direction and watching with careful eyes. That god that had been built up and up reduced to a statue that simply sat down and waited pointlessly. He wasn't shocked or stunned when that same doctor had hesitantly walked out, voice hesitant and strained as they apologized that there wasn't much they could do.

Phobos lets go of the recollection with a sigh, internally cringing with guts tying further at the shakiness of it. He feels it all and feels nothing at the same time, humiliation and regret, despair and decay, an ugly mix of emotions he'd never associated with himself. You had knocked him down from his detached state as a god, both in life and in death. He can feel himself reach out to your side of the bed, he can just barely feel himself actively doing it at this point ; it's more of a reflex or routine that he's fallen into, doing it mindlessly without question or purpose.

The feeling of the sheets greets him, empty and cold ; he chokes back a sob.

#director phobos x reader #phobos x reader #madness combat imagines #madness combat x reader #madcom imagines #madcom x reader #rot writes

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anniebibananie · 3 years

Note

love your ray and heather story! i don't know if you're accepting prompts, but would you write something about heather finding out about ray running into the fire for her?? I just need that SCENE

thank you! i'm so happy you enjoyed i wish i could leave you my love.

also ty for the prompt it's been a while but i do love writing prompts so here you goooooo

[side note: wyattnash on ao3 (if someone knows their tumblr lmk) also wrote a oneshot for this premise: Blame it on the Flame]

my heather & ray playlist for listening as u read

***

It's been two months since Panic ended. As much as Panic ever ends for someone who has played it, or for Carp where Panic sometimes feels like its secret beating heart. The one thing that keeps the youth of this town alert, alive, aching for bigger and better things.

Panic may be dumb, but sometimes Heather thinks it's the one thing that reminds them all they have any say at all in their own lives.

"Heather! You dropped this," comes a voice from behind her, and Heather turns. Drew is holding out the pack of crayons she'd just bought from the pharmacy, which clearly fell from between her arms. "Seems important," he says with a kind smile.

"Thanks, Drew." Heather sighs as she reaches out and takes the pack, stacking it back into the crook of her arm with the toilet paper rolls and bottle of ibuprofen she'd just purchased.

Lily is out of crayons, and Heather can't forget the expressive hope in her eyes when she'd asked for more. Her and Ray had started drawing together on afternoons when he was over, and Heather wasn't going to be a contributing factor in ending that wholesome activity. Something they both seemed to enjoy.

"Lily would be sad if her and Ray couldn't work on the town map they've spent the last week drawing together. I've never seen either of them so focused on anything." She puffs out a breath.

It came as a surprise at first to see Ray so tender with Lily, so receptive, until Heather thought about it and realized maybe it wasn't a surprise at all. Ray, at his core, is a sweet person who simply had built a million protective shells around it. That's what kind people who live in the dirt were forced to do. Heather got it.

Drew's eyebrows quirk up. "You and Ray going well then?"

"Hm?" Heather tilts her head. She knows what he's asking, but Heather isn't ready to spill her guts on the sidewalk to Drew. Even if she likes Drew.

Because what her and Ray have has grown into something tender, too. Something she holds so closely and dearly to her chest that sometimes she's afraid if she holds it in the palm of her hand someone might grab it away, tear it before she can stop them.

Drew rolls his eyes. "You're not tricking anyone. He's such an asshole sometimes, but when we all saw him run into Graybill's house after you? I've never heard anyone scream someone's name like that. Dude was so into you even then."

Her eyebrows scrunch, meeting in the middle. "Graybill's house? What are you talking about?"

Now Drew is the one confused. "No one ever told you? As soon as we realized you and Natalie were missing he ran straight back into the fire. I can't believe no one mentioned it."

The conversation fades quickly after that, Heather making some passing remark, and the two saying goodbye companionably. But Heather can't stop thinking about it. The image of Ray running straight into the fire, calling her name, trying to save her from danger.

That was after she'd upset him. Even then he cared. Which isn't really a surprise, either, she supposes, but it does something to her heart. Makes it tighter, the fondness tightening something wicked in her chest. The inescapable feeling she has for him even more irrevocable.

***

She returns home to find Ray and Lily already in place. Heather ditches the toilet paper and other odds and ends into a nearby chair, tossing the crayons onto the coffee table they're circled around.

Ray looks up at her with a smile, dimple on display, that makes a smile of her own grow across her features.

"Thank you, Heather!" Lily sings, and Heather shoots a look her way before going to kiss the top of her head.

"Course, bug." She pauses to look at the map. They've made good progress. It has streets and houses drawn out but also little things. A book colored by the library. A pair of scissors by the hairdressers and a little heart Heather knows Lily must have drawn for their mom, even now. "Ray? Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Ooo," Lily jokes, though her head remains dipped forward in concentration.

Ray holds out his hand, and Heather releases a huff of breath as she pulls him up to standing. He kisses her briefly, hands still connected between them, and she rolls her eyes.

They make their way to the kitchen, where Heather gets a pot of water boiling for dinner before turning around and kicking her foot at his leg.

He tilts his head, crowding closer to her. "What's that for, Nill? Gonna reprimand me?"

She crosses her arms, mostly because she wants to maintain some distance while she says what comes next. Ray can be too persuasive when he closes in, making her forget words she wants to say.

"You ran into the fire at Graybill's." It's not a question because they both know the answer.

She watches his face, and there's that wrecked look again he'd given her after she asked about the words he said on the bridge. Like she's seen a part of him he hadn't actually anticipated anyone getting a glimpse of, and he dips his head. It comes to rest on her shoulder for a second before he pulls back.

"How'd you find out?"

"Not telling." Her lips twist into something between a smirk and a smile. "You don't get to get hurt because of me, okay? That's not love."

He hums, clearly not agreeing, and Heather is mad at him almost. The fact that he believes his life to be more disposable than hers, but she supposes she's honored, too. That Ray would be willing to do that for her and not seek thanks, not even needing her to know it.

"My only regret is I couldn't save you." He shakes his head, looking out the window over the kitchen for a minute instead of at her. "But you didn't need me, hey? Did it all on your own like the badass you are."

"I am a badass," she agrees. He turns his head back with a laugh, and he flows like water when she pulls him in by the belt loops to kiss her. "Thank you, but you don't do that again, okay?"

"Panic is over, remember? No more opportunities to throw myself into the flames for Heather Nill."

Which isn't an agreement, and Heather thinks it's wrong anyways because Panic is never over for them. Panic is a game they're alway playing, trying to keep themselves calm to get through all of the challenges Carp throws at them.

But she loves him. She really does, and she thinks she'd probably do the same if she had to. The way she'd gotten behind the wheel for Lily. The way she'd jumped from a cliff for freedom. She would do a lot for the people she loves.

"You're an idiot," she reminds him, words meant to be sharp but coming out fragile anyways.

His smile is radiant. "Yours, though," and he kisses her again against the counter.

Yes, she thinks. You are.

#nillhall #heather x ray #panic amazon #panic tv show #annie writes #my fanfiction #prompts #nillhall prompts #i love them just like as a reminder #i just love the idea of ray and lily coloring together ok #sue me #heather nill

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ginanosakka · 3 years

Text

Passed Down Trauma

Masterlist

The War Has Begun | Next

“Why are you attempting to assassinate Eito L/N?”

“I’m not.”

“You’re lying, L/N. We found the notes in your home, we found the gun hidden in your car, and all of Japan has seen the video of you slandering your own father. Why did you do it?” Officer Yuikmara slammed his hands on the table in attempts to strike fear in you.

Without faltering, you said with a smile, “I can’t tell you what I didn’t do. . . but I can tell you that you have twenty four hours to let me go before it all gets fully released, Mr. Yuikmara.”

Katsuki and Kirishima stood in the living room of Katsuki’s apartment on what felt like pounds of questions and anxiety. Everything was going smoothly in the operation to protect Y/N and Ryu — now one was missing and the other was in police custody. The tension in the room was thick and despite Eijirou’s tendency to lighten situations, he made no move to ease his friend’s mind. In fact, deep down he wanted Katsuki to suffer for reasons that he knew were selfish and out of line. The unspoken feelings he had for a woman that he shouldn’t want were not hidden, and could not stay silent forever. Especially when that woman’s life was in danger and he couldn’t help but blame Bakugou.

“I’m going to burn that bastard’s house down, and Icy-Hot can put out the damn flames when I’m done.” Katsuki fumed as he paced the floor to try and calm down to think clearly. It was taking everything in him to follow the law and try to take Eito down the legal way, but with every minute he spent working on the case, he realized just how inbedded that man was in hero companies and the police force.

“That won’t get Y/N home, and you know it. What we need to do is wait for her to post bail and find Ryu, she’s probably worried about him.” Eijirou said, trying to find a way to solve all of this and think of what would help Ryu and Y/N.

Katsuki glared at Eiji, “you think you know everything? Y/N wasn’t even phased when we found out he was missing, you idiot!” Katsuki seethed at him.

“I know that Y/N loves her kid more than anything else, so maybe you were too busy being emotional to understand what she was feeling!” Kirishima bit back, not wavering under Katsuki’s harsh gaze.

“You’re just some sad, lovesick moron,” Katsuki taunted. “Why don’t you just admit the reason you don’t believe that she knows where Ryu is, is because you don’t want to believe that she’s hiding things? You think she trusts you so much that she’d tell you more than me? I can guarantee you that, like always, you’ll never be better than me.” Katsuki finished, both of them standing face to face with clenched fists and locked jaws.

The silence was loud like roaring beasts threatening the other to make the first move; two men who fell for the one they couldn’t fully get their arms around. Their friendship was equally as important to both of them, but how could one swallow their feelings for Y/N, simply for the sake of the other? Neither of them thought the other was worthy enough for such a beautiful tragedy you had written in your very bones. There was no personality, no smile, no heart that could compare to you. Even if they fought, the loser wouldn’t dare accept defeat.

A ringing phone broke through the silence, Katsuki’s pocket suddenly vibrating and taking his attention as he pulled it out. An unknown number was displayed across the screen, and in normal circumstances, he would have immediately sent it to voicemail with no hesitation or concern for who was on the other line. Today was anything but a normal circumstance.

“Hello,” he answered in a clipped tone.

“Mr. Bakugou, it’s Nanami. . I have important information I need to discuss with you.”

Rotting in a holding cell wasn’t how you wanted to spend your weekend, but it was better than being dead — you weren’t sure you wouldn’t be dead soon anyway, so you’re savoring just being in jail. You couldn’t even post bail, so you had to sit on the brick like bed and wait for everything to go through. Everything you built was currently being destroyed while you sat here calmly, waiting for the fire that is your father to be put out so you can remove the remains of his hold on your life and be free. . .

. . .Free to do what?

“L/N, you have a visitor, let’s go.” An officer interrupted your peace and opened the door of your cell, and you followed him without a word.

When you entered the small, dimly lit room, a woman sat there with such a crestfallen expression that you could barely recognize her. Her skin that was always flawless with minimal makeup was bare and her color suggested sickness. The gorgeous and bouncy hair that she did her best to maintain everyday was dull and clearly untouched. She looked like a mess, even in her bright flower patterned spring dress.

“Mom?” You said quietly, feeling a twinge of fear towards her when she was in such an unhinged state.

She looked up at you open hearing that word spill from your lips, and her expression brightened ever so slightly. It settled the fear and allowed you to fully fall into worry as you slipped into the chair in front of her — for the first time in years you offered her your hand for comfort. When her cold hand touched yours, you squeezed tightly in hopes of bringing her some warmth even in the cold room.

“I always knew you were secretly a momma’s girl,” were the first words out of her mouth along with an airy laugh. The joke was strange when it came from her, but for her sake you cracked a small smile. “I have a lot to tell you, Y/N.” She said in the softest tone you’d ever heard, grabbing every bit of your attention.

“You don’t have much time, so just say what you have to say.” You urged her, unsure of when you’d be able to speak to her again once she left this room. She had fallen off the Earth after that phone call, and you didn’t want her to leave you with questions.

Your mother began with a deep breath, “I’ve been married to your father for twenty five years. I did it for the money, never once thinking or caring about what he did and how he acted. . . until you were gone. I realized that he was. . different from other people. One day he was kind and compassionate, the next he was ruthless and cold, like a ticking time bomb that kept going off and shortening the time until it’s next reaction. It was easy to ignore at first, I just left him alone as I always did and made sure our interactions were kept completely secret. . Then he saw you on the news with that Bakugou boy-“

“You have five minuets left,” a man called on a speaker into the roo and you gestured for her to get to the point.

“What I’m trying to say is that there’s something wrong with him, Y/N. If you take him down by just destroying all his business and credibility I’m scared he’ll do something drastic that will hurt a lot of people.” Your mother said shakily, and the fear in her face was chilling you to the core, along with the fact that if you looked back you could tell that she was right.

‘What do I know about my grandparents on his side? I’ve never seen a baby picture from him, or even any picture of when he was young! What happened to him that drove him to become the controlling business man that would step on anyone in his way?’ You thought at a rapid speed, finding too many similarities between your reaction to trauma with how he always had acted. If not then more extreme.

“What am I supposed to do?” You whispered, your eyes falling to the cold metal table between you two.

“You have to talk to him,”’ your mother said. “I know you have a way of getting out of here, and when you do, go straight to him and tell no one. . You are his biggest failure in his eyes, and I know you’re the only one who can get through to him.” She squeezed your hand this time, assuring you that what she was saying was true.

“And what about you?” You asked. “Whether I destroy his business or get him the help he needs, you’re still going to lose everything.”

She smiled, “no. I just got everything I needed.”

A/N: We’re getting somewhere :P

Taglist (Closed) <3 : @fandomgirllover @cloudsgathering @that-bipolar-renegade-romantic @jazzylove @that-chick212 @bonbonthedragon @misssugarless @insomniac-nerd-posts-things @bakugous-bakahoe @pinkykookie17 @animexholic @arielting @samkysnks @simpforeveryone @damnirina @deneuves @tsumuuumiyaaaa @vintage-teddyxo @regalmigraine @samvmgh @iamagalaxy @officialtrashbusiness @xwackk @videogameboiwhowins @marajillana @ellasdilemma @plutoneu @saucey-kneecapzz42020 @thestarsanctuary @dewdropwifu @star-light-imagines @kritiiiii @bakugosbottombitch @the2ndl @candybabey @simply-not-the-same @sam-i-am-1025 @mes-bisous @eternallyvenus @peppytine @chaelysian @definitely-yours @oikawarc @suneaterofthebig3 @m0na-l0ver @nkb0048 @losertsukki @notyourfavorlte @caramelsquares @hikaru-mikazuki

#bakugou x reader #bnha bakugou #bnha #bakugo x reader #x reader #bnha fanfiction #bnha angst #katsuki bakugo x y/n #bnha x reader #anime x reader #bnha kirishima #kirishima x reader #eijirou x reader #bnha eijirou

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bubmyg · 3 years

Text

there was no particular reason i wrote all this down other than reading the translations to my universe made me cry last week because i’m just Like this. this is a mini compilation of yoongi lyrics that i hold gently in my palm and close to my heart in a he’s my artist for life kind of way. these aren’t all my favorite yoongi lyrics, i certainly have more but not ones that fit this general vibe.

this is like extremely disorganized, i kind of just wrote it like a journal (and i’ll probably copy it to my bullet journal at some point actually). interpretations are my own, music is cool in that we can all read and hear the same thing and get different things out of it (which is why yoongi has often said he doesn’t attach specific meaning to things, giving it up to the listener instead)

so yeah. here’s me being fond of yoongi in 4k for no reason other than. idk. i wanted to. all translations are from doyoubangtan and doolsetbangtan.

song request - lee sora ft suga

“I’ll be with you, for your birth and your end; That you’d remember that I’m with you, wherever you are; I’ll be a comfort for your life at any time, and so; please, that you’d lean on me and take a rest, every once in awhile.”

to me, this perfectly encapsulates what creating music is for yoongi in a two-fold kind of way. not only does he want his music to be a source of comfort for those who listen to it (just as the art of music is for himself), he’s also consistent in his assurance that taking a rest is okay. not being okay is okay. simply existing for the time being is okay. it’s a gentle empathy that comes from the experienced heart of someone who’s not going to tell you that it is okay, but will tell you that it won’t always be like this. friendly little moon trying to get you to smile with him on sleepless nights.

so far away - agust d ft suran

dream, will eventually be in full bloom at the end of hardships

this was on my undergrad graduation cap. it’s one of my favorite lyrics of all time. if so far away is my heart song, this is my heart lyric. this is a common motif in yoongi’s lyrics; dormancy is only temporary, you will bloom at the end of the cold winter.

dream, hope it to be there with you at your creation and at the end of your life

creation to end is another common motif n his lyrics. in this specific context, i imagine it to most closely be analogous to holding dreams close to you your entire life. dreams are dreams no matter how they manifest, even if they’re simply something you long for until your “end”.

Hope it to be there with you at your creation and at the end of your life; It will be generous to you wherever you stand; It will eventually be in full bloom at the end of hardships; The beginnings will seem humble, so prosperous will the future be

the entirety of this song reads like a story and this last refrain reads like the conclusion (kind of). the slight wording change from the previous choruses means a lot in that regard, more definite and firm. you will be okay. maybe not now, maybe not next week. but you will be.

suga’s interlude - halsey ft suga

Though the dawn before sunrise is darkest; don’t forget the stars you longed for only rise in the darkness

just a really pretty but heart wrenching lyric in the context of the entire song. he’s also used this metaphor several times. i love me a good string of consistency with minor adaptations to fit the vibe. this song also made me cry the first time i read the translations lmao.

my universe - coldplay ft bts

Because the trial we face now is just for a moment anyway; All you have to do is to just keep shining bright like now; And we will follow you, embroidering this long night

this could mean so many things depending on how you wanted to contextualize it. of course the song is about love, so you could view it in that way. we’re in the midst of a global pandemic where we can’t see each other. or maybe it’s simply existence. continue to exist and one day your bright light will be followed even in the darkest of nights.

also the og title of telepathy being 잠시 (for a moment) is so...min yoongi you are so cool

people - agust d

Did someone say humans are the animals of wisdom?; The way I see it, humans are the animals of regret

Your ordinaries are my extraordinaries; Your extraordinaries are my ordinaries; Your ordinaries are my extraordinaries; Your extraordinaries are my ordinaries

super simple to understand which i think makes it more poignant. especially if you contextualize it with everything he’s said or written regarding the plight of fame and how he himself grapples with it as min yoongi.

28 - agust d ft niihwa

just this whole song. if song request encapsulates yoongi’s musical ethos, this captures a lot of his general musings.

paradise - bts

Just living like this, surviving like this, that’s my small dream; Dreaming dreams, grasping dreams, breathing breaths, it’s often too much

a more blunt take on the simply existing is a good enough dream. yoongi’s 2018 new years message was one of the things that made me go “yes. Him™” so paradise is very <3 for me

interlude: shadow - bts

Flying high scares me; I mean, nobody had told me; how lonely it is here –;how my leap could be my fall

another thing he uses frequently, even as recently as an interview regarding permission to dance. the contemplation of how a fall is far scarier than landing because getting back up is uncertain.

Yeah, I’m you and you’re me, do you finally get that now?; Yeah, you’re me and I’m you, do you finally get that now?

the entirety of this song is haunting particularly paired with the sampling and the music video as a visual but this part is just...the whole idea of competing internal voices throughout the narrative of the song or if you’d rather truly treat the lyrics like a piece of literature, you have quite the unreliable narrator, one that’s trying to grapple with his own sense of self.

140503 at dawn - agust d

Pretending that I’m not lonely, pretending that I’m not suffering; needlessly pretending that I’m okay, and pretending hard that I’m strong; I built a wall in front of me, “Don’t come inside”; I’m an island in this wide ocean, “Don’t abandon me”

the entirety of agust d just makes me ache but i mainly pulled this part because he uses the island metaphor consistently. here, it’s used like i said before; achingly.

this song also gets overlooked a lot in the larger context of agust d but anyway

eight - IU ft suga

Island, yeah this is an island; a small island that we made for each other; Yeah, mm, forever young, the word ‘forever’ is a sandcastle; A farewell is just like an emergency text warning of a disaster; A morning met together with yearning; As each of us pass this eternity, we’re sure to meet again on this island

can i be honest and say i forgot this song came out at the beginning of the pandemic. anyway, if you haven’t heard the various times that jieun has spoke about this song and it’s conveyance, i encourage you to. the music video also gives a beautiful visual.

i wrote a small analysis of this when it came out so i’ll just put it here

burn it - agust d ft max

I hope you don’t forget that giving up decisively also counts as courage

of course this can absolutely be taken at a literal meaning especially considering he said a similar iteration of this to someone on kkul fm BUT i also like looking at it in context of the entire song because maybe this is him trying to convince himself too, especially considering the wording of the last chorus doesn’t change it so it implies in order to get past the fire u need to let it burn first? burn it = giving up on some aspect of pain?

i see why max didn’t shut up for eight months about making this song i wouldn’t either hello

outro: tear - bts

im including this one firstly because i love the song but secondly to say i knew the second u all were surprised by yoongi saying he wrote this as essentially a break up song for bts and they all cried while listening to it that y’all don’t actually read or interact w their lyrics fjdklafjsd

just bc it’s a rap song doesn’t mean it’s a diss or a flex. weirdos.

intro: never mind - bts

I hope you forget about all your mistakes and such; Never mind; It’s not easy, but engrave this in your heart; If you think you’re going to crash, accelerate more, you idiot; Never mind, never mind; Whatever thorny path it may be, go run; Never mind, never mind; There are a lot of things that you can’t control

the entire composition of nevermind is similar to first love and shadow to me where you can just hear the emotion in his voice while performing it

this is also another general idea that he mentions a few different times through different songs which as we’ve seen i am <3 for

intro: the most beautiful moment in life - bts

once again i don’t have a specific lyric to pull i just love this song so much and i feel like it isn’t talked about enough because first of all the use of the basketball throughout the instrumental, the incorporation of the origin of his stage name into an entire song regarding his general existence as a performer and coming into the beginnings of sizeable fame, and just his general way of essentially writing one giant ode to something he loves and analogizing it to something else he loves to talk through internal struggles.

aka im once again saying min yoongi you’re so cool

first love - bts

same line of awe from above this whole song is just a story, a poem, a journal entry, a beautiful confession, i don’t know. this is yoongi’s best bts solo u can argue with a wall about it also if you were able to see this live i hope u have a terrible week (im joking)

every fancam i’ve ever seen of this makes me cry. so. do with that what you will in regards to how i feel about this song.

#i have no reason for posting this so im not gonna tag it with anything other than so i can find it again for myself JFEKWFJS #ffr #my writing #i just realized only one of these is from an ot7 song help #there are so many others. tomorrow. autumn leaves. mikrokosmos. black swan........

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ot3 · 3 years

Text

i watched red vs blue: zero with my dear friends today and i was asked to “post” my “thoughts” on the subject. Please do not click this readmore unless, for some reason, you want to read three thousand words on the subject of red vs blue: zero critical analysis. i highly doubt that’s the reason anyone is following me, but hey.

anyway. here you have it.

Here are my opinions on RVB0 as someone who has quite literally no nostalgia for any older RVB content. I’ve seen seasons 1-13 once and bits and pieces of it more than once here and there, but I only saw it for the first time within the past couple of months. I’ve literally never seen any other RT/AH content. I can name a few people who worked on OG Red vs. Blue but other than Mounty Oum I have NO idea who is responsible for what, really, or what anything else they’ve ever worked on is, or whether or not they’re awful people. I know even less about the people making RVB0 - All I know is that the main writer is named Torrian but I honestly don’t even know if that’s a first name, a last name, or a moniker. All this to say; nothing about my criticism is rooted in any perceived slight against the franchise or branding by the new staff members, because I don’t know or care about any of it. In fact, I’m going to try and avoid any direct comparison between RVB0 and earlier seasons of RVB as a means of critique until the very end, where I’ll look at that relationship specifically.

So here is my opinion of RVB0 as it stands right now:

1. The Writing

Everything about RVB0 feels as if it was written by a first-time writer who hasn’t learned to kill his darlings. The narrative is both simultaneously far too full, leaving very little breathing room for character interaction, and oddly sparse, with a story that lacks any meaningful takeaway, interesting ideas, or genuine emotional connection. It also feels like it’s for a very much younger audience - I don’t mean this as a negative at all. I love tv for kids. I watch more TV for kids than I do for adults, mostly, but I think it’s important to address this because a lot of the time ‘this is for kids’ is used to act like you’re not allowed to critique a narrative thoroughly. It definitely changes the way you critique it, but the critique can still be in good faith. I watched the entirety of RVB0 only after it was finished, in one sitting, and I was giving it my full attention, essentially like it was a movie. I’m going to assume it was much better to watch in chunks, because as it stood, there was literally no time built into the narrative to process the events that had just transpired, or try and predict what events might be coming in the future. When there’s no time to think about the narrative as you’re watching it, the narrative ends up as being something that happens to the audience, not something they engage with. It’s like the difference between taking notes during a lecture or just sitting and listening. If you’re making no attempt to actively process what’s happening, it doesn’t stick in your mind well. I found myself struggling to recall the events and explanations that had immediately transpired because as soon as one thing had happened, another thing was already happening, and it was like a mental juggling act to try and figure out which information was important enough to dwell on in the time we were given to dwell on it.

Which brings me to another point - pacing. Every event in the show, whether a character moment, a plot moment, or a fight scene, felt like it was supposed to land with almost the exact same amount of emotional weight. It all felt like The Most Important Thing that had Yet Happened. And I understand that this is done as an attempt to squeeze as much as possible out of a rather short runtime, but it fundamentally fails. When everything is the most important thing happening, it all fades into static. That’s what most of 0’s narrative was to me: static. It’s only been a few hours since I watched it but I had to go step by step and type out all of the story beats I could remember and run it by my friends who are much more enthusiastic RVB fans than I am to make sure I hadn’t missed or forgotten anything. I hadn’t, apparently, but the fact that my takeaway from the show was pretty accurate and also disappointingly lackluster says a lot. Strangely enough, the most interesting thing the show alluded to - a holo echo, or whatever the term they used was - was one of the things least extrapolated upon in the show’s incredibly bulky exposition. Benefit of the doubt says that’s something they’ll explore in future seasons (are they getting more? Is that planned? I just realized I don’t actually know.)

And bulky it was! I have quite honestly never seen such flagrant disregard for the rule of “show, don’t tell.” There was not a single ounce of subtlety or implication involved in the storytelling of RVB0. Something was either told to you explicitly, or almost entirely absent from the narrative. Essentially zilch in between. We are told the dynamic the characters have with each other, and their personality pros and cons are listed for us conveniently by Carolina. The plot develops in exposition dumps. This is partially due to the series’ short runtime, but is also very much a result of how that runtime was then used by the writers. They sacrificed a massive chunk of their show for the sake of cramming in a ton of fight scenes, and if they wanted to keep all of those fight scenes, it would have been necessary to pare down their story and characters proportionally in comparison, but they didn’t do that either. They wanted to have it both ways and there simply wasn’t enough time for it.

The story itself is… uninteresting. It plays out more like the flimsy premise of a video game quest rather than a piece of media to be meaningfully engaged with. RVB0 is I think something I would be pitched by a guy who thinks the MCU and BNHA are the best storytelling to come out of the past decade. It is nothing but tropes. And I hate having to use this as an insult! I love tropes. The worst thing about RVB0 is that nothing it does is wholly unforgivable in its own right. Hunter x Hunter, a phenomenal shonen, is notoriously filled with pages upon pages of detailed exposition and explanations of things, and I absolutely love it. Leverage, my favorite TV show of all time, is literally nothing but a five man band who has to learn to work as a team while seemingly systematically hitting a checklist of every relevant trope in the book. Pacific Rim is an incredibly straightforward good guys vs giant monsters blockbuster to show off some cool fight scenes such as a big robot cutting an alien in half with a giant sword, and it’s some of the most fun I ever have watching a movie. Something being derivative, clunky, poorly executed in some specific areas, narratively weak, or any single one of these flaws, is perfectly fine assuming it’s done with the intention and care that’s necessary to make the good parts shine more. I’ll forgive literally any crime a piece of media commits as long as it’s interesting and/or enjoyable to consume. RVB0 is not that. I’m not sure what the main point of RVB0 was supposed to be, because it seemingly succeeds at nothing. It has absolutely nothing new or innovative to justify its lack of concern for traditional storytelling conventions. Based solely on the amount of screentime things were given, I’d be inclined to say the narrative existed mostly to give flimsy pretense for the fight scenes, but that’s an entire other can of worms.

2. The Visuals + Fights

I have no qualms with things that are all style and no substance. Sometimes you just want to see pretty colors moving on the screen for a while or watch some cool bad guys and monsters or whatever get punched. RVB0 was not this either. The show fundamentally lacked a coherent aesthetic vision. Much of the show had a rather generic sci-fi feel to it with the biggest standouts to this being the very noir looking cityscape, which my friends and I all immediately joked looked like something from a batman game, or the temple, which my friends and I all immediately joked looked like a world of warcraft raid. They were obviously attempting to get variety in their environment design, which I appreciate, but they did this without having a coherent enough visual language to feel like it was all part of the same world. In general, there was also just a lack of visual clarity or strong shots. The value range in any given scene was poor, the compositions and framing were functional at best, and the character animation was unpleasantly exaggerated. It just doesn’t really look that good beyond fancy rendering techniques.

The fight scenes are their entire own beast. Since ‘FIGHT SCENE’ is the largest single category of scenes in the show, they definitely feel worth looking at with a genuine critical eye. Or, at least, I’d like to, but honestly half the time I found myself almost unable to look at them. The camera is rarely still long enough to really enjoy what you’re watching - tracking the motion of the character AND the camera at such constant breakneck high speeds left little time to appreciate any nuances that might have been present in the choreography or character animation. I tried, believe me, I really did, but the fight scenes leave one with the same sort of dizzy convoluted spectacle as a Michael Bay transformers movie. They also really lacked the impact fight scenes are supposed to have.

It’s hard to have a good, memorable fight scene without it doing one of three things: 1. Showing off innovative or creative fighting styles and choreography 2. Making use of the fight’s setting or environment in an engaging and visually interesting way or 3. Further exploring a character’s personality or actions by the way they fight. It’s also hard to do one of these things on its own without at least touching a bit on the other two. For the most part, I find RVB0’s fight scenes fail to do this. Other than rather surface level insubstantial factors, there was little to visually distinguish any of RVB0’s fight scenes from each other. Not only did I find a lot of them difficult to watch and unappealing, I found them all difficult to watch and unappealing in an almost identical way. They felt incredibly interchangeable and very generic. If you could take a fight scene and change the location it was set and also change which characters were participating and have very little change, it’s probably not a good fight scene.

I think “generic” is really just the defining word of RVB0 and I think that’s also why it falls short in the humor department as well.

3. The Comedy

Funny shit is hard to write and humor is also incredibly subjective but I definitely got almost no laughs out of RVB0. I think a total of three. By far the best joke was Carolina having a cast on top of her armor, which, I must stress, is an incredibly funny gag and I love it. But overall I think the humor fell short because it felt like it was tacked on more than a natural and intentional part of this world and these characters. A lot of the jokes felt like they were just thrown in wherever they’d fit, without any build up to punchlines and with little regard for what sort of joke each character would make. Like, there was some, obviously Raymond’s sense of humor had the most character to it, but the character-oriented humor still felt very weak. When focusing on character-driven humor, there’s a LOT you can establish about characters based on what sort of jokes they choose to make, who they’re picking as the punchlines of these jokes, and who their in-universe audience for the jokes is. In RVB0, the jokes all felt very immersion-breaking and self aware, directed wholly towards the audience rather than occurring as a natural result of interplay between the characters. This is partially due to how lackluster the character writing was overall, and the previously stated tight timing, but also definitely due to a lack of a real understanding about what makes a joke land.

A rule of thumb I personally hold for comedy is that, when push comes to shove, more specific is always going to be more funny. The example I gave when trying to explain this was this:

saying two characters had awkward sex in a movie theater: funny

saying two characters had an awkward handjob in a cinemark: even funnier

saying two characters spent 54 minutes of 11:14's 1:26 runtime trying out some uncomfortably-angled hand stuff in the back of a dilapidated cinemark that lost funding halfway through retrofitting into a dinner theater: the funniest

The more specific a joke is, the more it relies on an in-depth understanding of the characters and world you’re dealing with and the more ‘realistic’ it feels within the context of your media. Especially with this kind of humor. When you’re joking with your friends, you don’t go for stock-humor that could be pulled out of a joke book, you go for the specific. You aim for the weak spots. If a set of jokes could be blindly transplanted into another world, onto another cast of characters, then it’s far too generic to be truly funny or memorable. I don’t think there’s a single joke in RVB0 where the humor of it hinged upon the characters or the setting.

Then there’s the issue of situational comedy and physical comedy. This is really where the humor being ‘tacked on’ shows the most. Once again, part of what makes actually solid comedy land properly is it feeling like a natural result of the world you have established. Real life is absurd and comical situations can be found even in the midst of some pretty grim context, and that’s why black comedy is successful, and why comedy shows are allowed to dip into heavier subject matter from time to time, or why dramas often search for levity in humor. It’s a natural part of being human to find humor in almost any situation. The key thing, though, once again, is finding it in the situation. Many of RVB0’s attempts at humor, once again, feel like they would be the exact same jokes when stripped from their context, and that’s almost never good. A pretty fundamental concept in both storytelling in general but particularly comedy writing is ‘setup and payoff’. No joke in RVB0 is a reward for a seemingly innocuous event in an earlier scene or for an overlooked piece of environmental design. The jokes pop in when there’s time for them in between all the exposition and fighting, and are gone as soon as they’re done. There’s no long term, underlying comedic throughline to give any sense of coherence or intent to the sense of humor the show is trying to establish. Every joke is an isolated one-off quip or one-liner, and it fails to engage the audience in a meaningful way.

All together, each individual component of RVB0 feels like it was conjured up independently, without any concern to how it interacted with the larger product they were creating. And I think this is really where it all falls apart. RVB0 feels criminally generic in a way reminiscent of mass-market media which at least has the luxury of attributing these flaws, this complete and total watering down of anything unique, to heavy oversight and large teams with competing visions. But I don’t think that’s the case for RVB0. I don’t know much about what the pipeline is like for this show, but I feel like the fundamental problem it suffers from is a lack of heart.

In comparison to Red vs. Blue

Let's face it. This is a terrible successor to Red vs. Blue. I wouldn’t care if NONE of the old characters were in it - that’s not my problem. I haven’t seen past season 13 because from what I heard the show already jumped the shark a bit and then some. That’s not what makes it a poor follow up. What makes it a bad successor is that it fundamentally lacks any of the aspects of the OG RVB that made it unique or appealing at all. I find myself wondering what Torrian is trying to say with RVB0 and quite literally the only answer I find myself falling back onto is that he isn’t trying to say anything at all. Regardless of what you feel about the original RVB, it undeniably had things to say. The opening “why are we here” speech does an excellent job at establishing that this is a show intended to poke fun at the misery of bureaucracy and subservience to nonsensical systems, not just in the context of military life, but in a very broad-strokes way almost any middle-class worker can relate to. At the end of the day, fiction is at its best when it resonates with some aspect of its audience’s life. I know instantly which parts of the original Red vs Blue I’m supposed to relate to. I can’t say anything even close to that about 0.

RVB is an absurdist parody that heavily satirizes aspects of the military and life as a low-on-the-food-chain worker in general that almost it’s entire target audience will be familiar with. The most significant draw of the show to me was how the dialogue felt like listening to my friends bicker with each other in our group chats. It required no effort for me to connect with and although the narrative never outright looked to the camera and explained ‘we are critiquing the military’s stupid red tape and self-fullfilling eternal conflict’ they didn’t need to, because the writing trusted itself and its audience enough to believe this could be conveyed. It is, in a way, the complete antithesis to the badass superhero macho military man protagonist that we all know so well. RVB was saying something, and it was saying it in a rather novel format.

Nothing about RVB0 is novel. Nothing about RVB0 says anything. Nothing about it compels me to relate to any of these characters or their situations. RVB0 doesn’t feel like absurdism, or satire. RVB0 feels like it is, completely uncritically, the exact media that RVB itself was riffing off of. Both RVB0 and RVB when you watch them give you the feeling that what you’re seeing here is kids on a playground larping with toy soldiers. It’s all ridiculous and over the top cliche stupid garbage where each side is trying to one-up the other. The critical difference is, in RVB, we’re supposed to look at this and laugh at how ridiculous this is. In RVB0 we’re supposed to unironically think this is all pretty badass.

The PFL arc of the original RVB existed to show us that setting up an elite team of supersoldiers with special powers was something done in bad faith, with poor outcomes, that left everyone involved either cruel, damaged, or dead. It was a bad thing. And what we’re seeing in RVB0 is the same premise, except, this time it’s good. We’re supposed to root for this format. RVB0 feels much more like a demo reel, cutscenes from a video game that doesn’t exist, or a shonen anime fanboy’s journal scribbling than it feels like a piece of media with any objective value in any area. In every area that RVB was anti-establishment, RVB0 is pure undiluted establishment through and through.

#long post #really long post guys. look out !#rvb

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