#at least today was uhhhhh. less bad.

[kalu-chan]

Being on Tumblr is just like. Going into a fandom tag. Reading like 3 posts. Vowing to not go into that tag again.

Going back into it the next day.

#at least today was uhhhhh. less bad. #honestly kinda funny bc there were so many #''It's so obvious Ship A is canon and not Ship B because of these things.'' - ''Ship B is clearly canon Ship A is not'' #One after another #As someone with low to no stakes in either it's just kinda like. lmao. chill. #Like yeah ship whatever and it's always nice to see things that imply your ship #(I still smile over ''Dig in there Mr Spock'' and ''Captain please. Not in front of the Klingons.'' :) ) #But you don't need to like. argue against other ships. #Fandom is a playground and y'all are not gonna run out of sand lmao #But god yesterday or the day before was. Oof. #Though also a bit funny bc there were two posts right after another like #''Character A is NOT badly written y'all just suck'' - ''Gosh I wish Character A wasn't so badly written 😭'' #from different people obviously but still skfjwkfj #But uhhh yeah I think I should stay out of the tag. #The fandom can be 1 mutual; 1 close friend I spam on Discord; and a few online pals in a Discord thread #... i plan on writing fanfic for it tho and i'm already. curious. whether that'll finally get me hit by fandom drama #I'm usually good at avoiding it but I do not trust this fandom in particular #Also a lotta people in this tag that go ''Their relationship can't be X because clearly no one in X relationship would act like that'' #which just made very clear they have probably never experienced said type of relationship lmao #Had to add some tags but I'm done now. maybe this time I'll manage to stay out of the tag skfnskfns #I should before the Shipping Arguments make me dislike the ships I enjoyed or was at least neutral about lmao

[i--antimony]

BIG tuesday

i skipped last tuesday because i was working on a take-home exam and simply did not have the time nor the inclination, so: beefy tuesdaypost today!

listening: my brother recommended 'dead magic' by anna von hausswolff and boy what an album. gothic, punchy, very vibey. the kind of album you let wash over you like an ocean wave.

pulled 'mostly kosher' from my to-listen list. fun, funky, very jewish, good vibes. ikh hob dikh tsufil lib

i've continued to mainline borodin symphonies 1 & 2. idk they're just hitting right.

and the new pieces for the orchestra i'm in - very french this time round: debussy's fêtes: kinda spooky and ominous and also fluid in a fun way! lots of buildup that seems to resolve into nothingness. horn parts for this are pretty good, not too difficult but are definitely Heard. chabrier's españa: really bumpin horn parts. fun bouncy motifs. what's not to like.

pocasting-wise, i'm up to partizan 38. 10 episodes left!!! the home stretch!!!!! it's so good but things are definitely amping up in the end-of-fatt-season way.

i've also listened to my friend b's gotham tv show podcast 'jim gordon must die'. very good and funny. i laughed out loud at some of the episode 3 descriptions.

reading: i was stuck in Bad Airport Times this past saturday (flight delayed 3 hours, then sat for an hour on the tarmac, arrived at 10pm when i was originally supposed to arrive at like 630) so i blasted through all ~150k words of 'freefall' by Kunoichi21 and xoTsundoku. bog-standard mafia au, but with a fun little circus arts twist; fun background fengqing; i do not like that they made beefleaf wholesome. give me my toxic beefleaf god damn it. but otherwise it was a fun read, sappy romcom-style. the fic itself isn't quite done but it's in endgame. the author notes have peak fanfic culture energy of "hey guys! sorry i didn't update, i started nursing school and my dad died" bro .... ;___; goddamn. please take care of urselves

watching: we are almost done with kill la kill! last two eps!!! so tonight we're doing that and also watching last week's dunmeshi together.

friend and i finished comrade detective. incredible. no notes. so funny. we started 'endeavour' which is a detective morse prequel thing and goddd the british-isms, and also started serial experiments lain. i don't know what i was expecting but god it was not this. i literally thought this was a cute fun hacker mystery show in the energy of cowboy bebop. it is Not That. not even close. it's good though i'm enjoying it. currently staggering through life going uhhhhh like lain does in the first few eps.

playing: fallow. i am re-installing disco elysium on my computer though. ive been wondering if i should try to keep going on the save file from last year or if i should just start over because i barely got in there at all.

making: many things. pottery!! some good some not as good.

so this design came out SO nice but the underglaze is so gd streaky! i hate it !!! i don't think it's really fixable either, i tried the hairspray trick to put new solid glaze over top the inside so at least that would look less like shit but i could not get it to work. maybe sanding it down? idk. it's ugly. it was supposed to be a bright teal but the woman who runs the studio mixed the batch up wrong so it's like. a really drab gray and not in a fun or intentional way. idk.

some new bisque:

teacups came out! still mismatched but cute nonetheless! gonna do them in a sort of celadon-type color with white flowers to match the teapot that my SO has :)

i don't feel like adding more photos for these lol they're very boring. the pot for my mom came out fine i think. gonna go in with normal white glaze over top to paint in some trees or other botanical designs. i sponged the underglaze on so hopefully the final result won't be streaky. sponged red on my seder plate to hopefully accomplish the same thing. mugs came through the bisque with no issues but i didn't do anything fun with underglaze on one of them so no new pics of that, but the other i did this tree thing again:

i KNOW it'll be streaky as hell. i just know. so i'm considering how i want to do it. perhaps putting some slightly transparent green over the top of it all to meld it together? unsure.

some new stuff: made a citrus juicer, this was attempt number 2 and just barely got it to work, attempt 1 was a total disaster. also made another mug type object, hopefully it'll still be wet enough this weekend to slap a handle on.

two mugs with red clay, i really loved the lascaux mugs that jessica bartram put up for sale last year but i didnt snag one in time so i was like. fuck it. i will make my own. gonna let them dry to leather hard before going in with black underglaze.

i've been trying to draw again but. idk. i just feel very uninspired. i start drawing and it's like :| :| :|

eating: i was on my own food-wise for much of the last week because my roommate was babysitting for the rabbi, so i did not eat nearly as extravagantly as i normally do, LOL. i made a lo mein recipe that was kinda just a stir fry. this could have been my fault because i added a bunch of extra shit like bok choy and mushrooms. i also didn't use the correct type of noodle, and i didnt have oyster sauce so i used worcestershire, etc. many substitutions so it's probably not fair for me to say it was Just Fine. will have to try again at some later date actually following the recipe. herb and radish salad with feta and walnuts: delicious. 10/10. i tossed in some extra arugula and that was also good. and i made the tofu brussel sprouts tahini/hoisin sauce thing again because it's easy and tasty.

misc: visiting my grandma right now ...... entrenched in the ennui .............. spring break ........................

#tuesdayposting #Spotify

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary166

2/27-28/2024

tuesday - wednesday

sooo tired.

i'll keep work related stuff short, i got sent in early, i was there from 3:00 to 9:57. i did take a 30 minute break though, but i didn't eat or anything. i woke up at about 11 am, so i didn't eat from then to about 11 pm. i also got complained about at work, because a woman thought i made her pay for a ride and her kids weren't able to get on or something and then like, used her credits to let people on or something, or that i was letting people on for free at some point. i don't remember anything like that happening, i think i just said no to her and she had to throw a fit.

anyway the problem song from last night is still a problem i think. some stuff needs to be fixed so i'm gonna do that. i'm also making toast. i did make actual dinner too but i am just sooo hungry lol.

the song is getting there. i just read an article about disney adults, and it's made me powerfully sad. not much else to say beyond that.

now i'm listening to built to spill, it's been a while, as a kid they were a favorite, or since being a kid, they've been a favorite. this time around, nothing's really changing there. but the memories are less about when i saw them as a kid, and more about my more recent brushes with them, i got to see them live a few years ago, and it was a really great concert, it was lovely to see doug up there playing songs off keep it like a secret. but the memories are specifically about this guy i saw there, unexpectedly, a very online guy i met in a class, about american short stories. the class was good, and i sat by this guy, and i really liked him. not romantically, i just found him charming in an earnest way, i wish we talked more, i wish we saw eachother more, he liked my 100% electronica shirt, he was very nice. when i saw him at the built to spill show, he was really feeling the music, when i told him i never really listened to keep it like a secret he said "well, you're gonna love this, this is the good stuff." and i saw him, during keep it like a secret, mouthing every word, fist in the air, eyes closed. it was religious for him, this memory of him, of chad, his name is chad, really moves me, his existence came off as very vulnerable, to be chad was to be vulnerable, i felt like, i dunno. he seemed very neurotic i suppose. or maybe not very, but he seemed sad in evident ways, he really moved me i guess. i dunno. men like that always do. it's people who seem to be horrifically sad, and people who i seem to be incapable of really getting to know, that linger in my mind, but never remain in my life. i guess now it's this sense that i'd like to staunch the misery by being his friend, up to now, but i'm bad at talking to people. i still need to talk to my mom.

for a while, on twitter, he'd sometimes interact with posts, and i'd interact with his. i liked that, it's sad too though, i wish we all had an easier time of being in each others lives.

the song does sound better now, at least. i feel so emotionally fried today. long hours really mess me up. it doesn't seem sustainable. i have to do it again today. maybe i need to do something to make that less, uhhhhh, likely, to happen to me, i guess. but idk what to really do. if i just say i can't work (x) days they might like, give me fucked up stupid shifts or something. guhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. this is the thing i hate, feeling my life taken away. i feel like a dumb stupid animal and like all that's waiting for me if i move an inch is punishment via stick on my stupid tiny skull and my brains splattering across everythingggggggggggggggg. or maybe just the back of a dryer, and my remains going unremoved, cooking off the heat of the dryer.

i feel like crying. dumb.

something bothers me about people being compliant, i guess, with that. but that's stupid, i shouldn't care, i just really hate knowing of people who are like workaholics basically, like they love it, that's like, disgusting to me almost. it's one person i'm thinking of, maybe that makes it okay, because i'm not even thinking of a type. i'm thinking of one human who bothers me. i'm just dumb and confused right now. i want to put my head underneath something super heavy.

unrelated to wanting to destroyyy myself, i think the song above has one of the most perfect snare sounds ever. the snare rolls are so violent, and still it's like, cute, too. it's perfect, as a sound. i wanna find something near that, and make grindcore with it, soon. maybe for the next ep, i'll evolve this drumkit in that direction, nail the snare sound.

3 am ughghhghg. i am gonna work out and try to feel better.

i worked out, and i think i've got this song right, for real this timeee. yayyyyyyyyyyy.

so, i should sleep now,

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#Youtube

[rosietrace]

Coughs awkwardly in announcement

So uhhhhh

To the people who went to my masterlist, you've probably noticed that all my AUs (excluding the remastered Addams family AU) have been crossed out and listed into ‘Old shit’

➜ More under the cut!

To my older AUs, I'm very sorry to say that I'm discontinuing them until a possible revision

And for the gamers that have grown attached to melodic misconceptions...

Yeah, sorry to say this but, it's discontinued too.

A lot of the reasons I've discontinued these AUs is because of certain decisions made within the writing that I just- Didn't like as much anymore. Especially in MM's case, since..... 💀

Not sorry to say that I'm never dabbling in oc x reader again. The romance aspect of MM is very clearly unimportant, and just plain weird to me now 😭

The following is more or less gonna be me talking about MM so.,,,,

──ㅇ─────↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺───ㅇ────

Melodic Misconceptions writing decisions that just.... Didn't age well at all

➜ The romance

THE ROMANCE IS SUCH A HUGE CAN OF WORMS, HOLY SHIT 😭 I'm so sorry I ever did this to Vic because an ‘x reader’ romance was not something she was planned for

To the people that liked the romance, I apologize because it just.... Didn't work for me as the series went on 💀

➜ Vil's characterization

Oh my lord. Oh my fucking lord.

As a Vil stan that has redeemed themselves, rereading what's left of MM is such a travesty with the way this man was written 😭😭 like how the hell did I do him so WRONG?;!::?;?

➜ Koral ‘Can you leave now’ Larrane

I was today years old to realize that Koral didn't fit the narrative whatsoever outside of being a foil to Ellis, and the series' personal punching bag 🤓

The only thing I really liked about the Koral plotline was that she was a foil to Ellis, no lie there 😭 I'm thinking of scrapping her altogether

➜ Shin and Runako

Sakura, please don't be offended when I say this, but.... Shin and Runako just- Didn't work with the narrative

Runako was only really relevant to Y/N and helping in developing the very shitty romance

And Shin is just..... A bit too personal to Chizuko? Like you can take him out of the story, and nothing would really change (yes I know that you suggested him being connected to Koral, but narratively speaking, I just didn't like it, I hope you can understand that 🙏)

I know I promised to make them have their time to shine in the series at some point, but now with MM being discontinued, I feel bad that as much as I don't like it, Runako and Shin won't have their time to shine anytime soon 😭 I can't word for the life of me FUCKKK

And.... I think that's it? From the top of my head, those are the only writing decisions that didn't age well in MM (at least imo)

I will be making a revised version of the series, so stay tuned for that! But in the meantime, thank you for supporting Melodic Misconceptions despite how messy it became 😭💔

#rosie 🌹 — announcements! #rip the mm tag #melodic misconceptions 🎹

[c-e-mcgill]

Just looking at this household management guide from 1865, and saw that it says “a man need not spend less than one-tenth, and should not spend more than one-sixth, of his entire income [on rent].” I.e., between 10 and 17%.

Which seems like.... not a lot. So out of curiosity, I looked up the average percentage of income that people today spend on rent and uhhhhh

At least thirty percent!! And amongst millennials specifically:

FORTY-FIVE PERCENT!

So yeah. 🙃 Obviously the guide above is not hard data but a ‘guide to household management,’ and AFAIK other daily living expenses like food and clothes were far more expensive in the 19th century than today, but still.

Don’t let politicians or older generations convince you that housing has always been this expensive. Don’t ever let anyone convince you you’re simply lazy or bad with money for not being able to make rent.

#This was in Beeton's Housewife's Treasury for anyone curious #Blog Posts #blog

[kimberly-spirits13]

Body Swap HC (Request) Batboys x reader (Gender N.)

Dick Grayson:

Suddenly Dick just wakes up

In some lavish hotel that happens to be in the same place as where you’re touring 

there’s a massive oh shit moment and then it’s like OH SHIT IM A SUPER STAR TODAY 

that totally doesn’t go to his head at all for a few seconds and then he realizes that he CANNOT ruin your reputation at all at this point 

so he tries to start rewatching the clips of your performances to learn the choreography 

that's when you wake up without an alarm panicked and freaking out 

WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING 

Jason comes running into the room and you scream covering yourself 

“Y/N?!?”

“Wait how’d you know?” 

“Dick screeches not yells.” 

“So you’re saying I’m more of a man that- never mind, how the hell do we fix this before my show?” 

You’re taken down to the cave where the forces of Constantine and Zatanna are called 

they try for hours and hours so that you’re able to get to your body again 

That's when they find that they need the two of you together 

So Constantine zaps Dick from New York to Gotham to finish this quickly 

“What the fuck is happeni- on hey me- I mean.... Y/N... Right?”

“Yeah.”

So you finally have it fixed and you’re back to the stadium right as you’re coming on

“Y/N WAIT!” 

Z comes and basically transforms you into your stage clothes and you run up to the stage for your performance right on time 

You do find however that Dick was prancing and walking around in costumes dancing to pop music 

Jason Todd:

What the fuck

He wakes up in your apartment suddenly and doesn’t remember anything that happened the night before

Which isn’t normal at all considering he typically always remember the patrol at least

What’s more startling is when he can’t find you

In your own apartment?

He walks into the bathroom and it all makes .... less sense but like okay now this is why you aren’t here

So now he’s gotta find you and how to fix it

He goes to the cave and the sensors recognize him as you

“Hey Y/N, your swords are here, you left them last night?” Dick came in and handed them to him

“Uh, so where’s Y- Jason? Where’s Jason?”

“Hasn’t woken up yet.”

Well then

Just as Jason is about to head upstairs, he gets a distress signal on your phone

So of course he goes to it cause this can wait since he’s pretty sure it’s not life threatening

So he goes and finds that there’s some people that have issue with you and your line of work

Does he kick their asses just cause he can and has unresolved anger caused by the nights you almost died coming home cause of them

Yes, yes he does

That’s when he gets a call from you on his phone and goes back to the manor to get this sorted out

“Who did this?”

“Former teammate gone rouge. He’s an idiot” you said coming in with a charm to switch the bodies

Once back, Jason’s relieved cause that was weird

Oh he also makes sure you know about the distress signal and all of that

Tim Drake:

This boy wasn’t ready to wake up in Stark Tower

Not at all

No one prepared him for Black Widow coming in and waking him- you up

Uhhhhh “Hey .... ms. Natasha, there’s something wrong

“Ms. Natasha? TIM?”

Uh yeah so that starts the whole issue of trying to find you

He calls you on your phone and you get a call from yourself

On Tim’s phone

Wait a seconnddddd

And then you realize and come running downstairs

“RICHARD JOHN GRAYSON COME HERE NOW”

Idk why Dick gets roped into this he just does

Once everyone’s caught up to speed you have to find Tim so you call him back

“Hey Timmy, where are you right now?”

“Stark Tower. Where are you? Manor I presume?”

“Correct. Don’t move, I’ll be there in a few minutes.” 

You arrive at the tower and are let in by your dad 

Tony leads you to his lab where Tim is in your body still in pajamas 

You’re both in pajamas still but that doesn’t matter 

Your dad has a bit of trouble getting the transformer machine to work so you help him

He finds it weird that you’re switched and wants to change it as fast as possible 

The man finally figures it out as Tim sits back and watches you and your father working this out 

Finally he works it out and you two give your phones back 

You just go back to your room with him and go back to sleep since you two need to be together incase it happens again

That means SLEEP

finally 

I wanna sleep 

Damian Wayne:

You’re a magic user like Zatanna or Constantine 

Basically what happens is Damian keeps up at how magic must not be that bad and difficult and eventually after enough pestering, you let him go through a spell book

Under his breath he tries it and it does work the way that he intended it to

See the spell wasn't supposed to transfer your minds into each other’s bodies

It was just supposed to teleport you to him 

Na man 

It doesn’t work immediately and he decides that he’ll say nothing about this since he doesn’t want you to tease him for not being able to do it 

That is until you suddenly start feeling super strange one night on patrol while you’re out and Damian is training in the cave 

He falls to his knees (same as you) and you’re both switched

Bruce turns around to see Damian (now you) straight struggling and comes over to you

“Uh... B? How’d I get here?”

“Okay which one of the boys are you now?”

“I’m Y/N....?”

“What did Damian do?”

“Probably fucked up one of my spells.” 

Bruce gets into your comm and contacts Damian who is now feeling the repercussions of this spell

You’re already upstairs getting your spell books, trying to find a solution to the problem

You’re not wanting to call Constantine or any of your mentors since you’re pretty sure that this has happened before and you’ve had to fix it 

not with Damian but this kind of thing isn’t new

“Alright genius show me which spell you messed up.” 

Damian comes and huffs next to you still in your body and finds the page in the book

“Ohhhhhh that’s not good.” you throw your head back and grumble 

“Why’d you have to mess up one of the most advanced spells in the book?”

Before Damian can question you, you’re preforming the counter spell of the body swap spell that he preforms 

it drains all of the energy out of you and as soon as you’re finished and the body swap is complete, you’re out of it for the night 

Damian rushes to catch you in case you fall, but you catch your balance on the counter top of the cave

“Now, you wanna not question me when I complain about a spell being difficult now?”

Damian just rolls his eyes and mutters an apology but feels bad as you two walk up the stairs to head to sleep

That’s the last time he tries to undermine magic 

#dc x reader #dc comics #dc characters #batfam x reader #batboys x reader #batfam #headcanon #teen titans x reader #teen titans #teen titans x y/n #dick grayson x you #dick grayson x y/n #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson #jason todd x you #jason todd x y/n #jason todd imagine #jason todd x reader #jason todd #tim drake x you #tim drake x reader #tim drake imagine #tim drake #damian wayne x you #damian wayne x y/n #damian wayne x reader #damian wayne imagine #damian wayne #nightcrawler x reader #red hood x reader

[carpisuns]

hiiii maryssa!! i had a capri sun for the first time in like ten years today and i thought of you lolll and it got me wondering which flavor is your favorite?? i got fruit punch bc i was very confused what both "pacific cooler" and "splash cooler" meant, and i thought i could consult with you to help my future purchases lmaoo

fLSKDJFLJKDSF it is very appropriate that this is the first ask i’m answering with my new url 😂

girl, i got u. let me break it down

first of all, u made a very solid choice with the fruit punch. that’s my favorite 😌 can’t go wrong with that. well done. i commend u

as for pacific cooler and splash cooler, those are just two of the many Cooler™️ flavors. tbh i couldn’t really tell u the exact flavor differences alsdkjfaj actually i think pacific cooler tastes kinda similar to fruit punch? idk but it’s good lol. splash cooler is also tasty. i think it has a stronger apple flavor. but mountain cooler is even apple-y-er. i like all of the cooler flavors!

basically, here are my recommendations:

1. fruit punch

2. tropical punch

3. any of the coolers

there’s also a strawberry kiwi, which i personally don’t care for much, but a lot of people love that one. wild cherry is ok. uhhhhh i don’t care for the lemonade one. those are p much all the flavors they carry at my grocery store so i couldn’t tell u about the others haha

side note: it’s weird that i’ve never had the orange flavor? cause that is the original flavor for caprisun in other countries, but i don’t think i’ve ever even seen it on sale here in the US even tho it is apparently available lol

ok but my biggest caution when buying caprisun is to make sure you’re getting the right TYPE. please study this visual aid carefully:

roarin’ waters is nothing but a DECEIVER ok!!! do not be fooled. it is not True caprisun. it’s just flavored water. which is not necessarily a bad thing in and of itself but i cant tell u how many times i’ve roarin waters’d myself thinking i was about to get a tasty sip of the classic caprisun Juice Drink Blend and instead i get the unsatisfying, watered-down, fake-sugar taste of roarin’ waters. it’s like thinking you’re about to bite into a chocolate chip cookie but then it turns out to be oatmeal raisin. which would possibly be a decentish cookie if that’s what you’re expecting but which is a devastating disappointment when you you are expecting something of superior taste and quality.

any flavor of regular caprisun u get will range from aight to v tasty but every flavor of roarin’ waters is the Worst. in my humble opinion. some people enjoy roarin’ waters equally, and those people are called ���very nice, but also Wrong”

TLDR:

there is also a 100% juice kind of caprisun at my grocery store, which, unsurprisingly, tastes exactly like whatever flavor of juice it is lol. i had apple and it tasted. like apple juice. which is good but also not what i was in the market for lol. plus those look like they’re made for smol children and im a Big Kid so i get the cool stuff aka REAL (fake, but not as fake as roarin’ waters) caprisun

one final thing to note in your caprisun-buying adventures:

the joy of drinking caprisun come not from the flavor of the drink (which is probably kinda mediocre tbh) but the experience of DRINKING IT FROM A POUCH!! 

juice in a cup: tasty, but boring. panache-less.

juice in a shiny silver pocket that you get to stab with a sharp yellow straw: YEEHAW SIGN ME THE EFF UP!!

so any flavor u get will at least bring you the delight of The Pouch. yes, even roarin waters.

thank u for coming to my TED talk. hope it was helpful lmao 

#ask #caprisun #long post #??? #i cant believe this is what im doing at 4am LDSKJFDSLJFDKD #smellerbeee

[aceofspadegrass]

It's Raining

Characters: Aguni Morizono, Hatter, Tatta Koudai, Arisu Ryohei, Last Boss, Niragi Suguru, Chishiya Shuntaro

Genre: Fluff. Just a thunderstorm, some vibes, and uh.... Monopoly. Briefly.

1.6k words

Man, writing with absolute zero idea of where I was going with it is.... interesting. My only thought was rainstorm, and here's what happened.

Rain pattered against the window, Aguni watching the raindrops fall down the glass with a cup of steaming hot coffee in hand. Takeru was still in bed, sleeping off the spaghetti and red wine they shared last night, half a cookie hanging out of his mouth. Aguni takes a long, slow sip of his coffee, making sure to blow on it beforehand. He didn’t need to burn his mouth after all. He grunts lightly, going over today’s schedule over his head. The rain looked bad, so he couldn’t go out today, nor could anybody else. It might be bad enough for a power outage, Aguni notes internally.

He heads outside and through the halls. The rain was loud even here, but the sound of yelling was louder, cheers and screams coming from Arisu’s room. Aguni peeks inside just to see what was up, after knocking on the door to notify he was coming inside. He blinks as he stares at Niragi, Tatta, and Arisu all sitting in the dark in front of the television, playing some racing game, Arisu firmly in first place with Niragi and Tatta fighting for second just behind him. Niragi and Arisu were more absorbed in the game, Niragi the main source of all the yelling, using Arisu’s blanketed head as an arm rest, the tallest out of all of them sitting on the barren bed while the other two took space on the floor. Tatta seemed less focused at least, although he doesn’t stop playing even as he greets Aguni.

“ Hi! Did you need something?”

“ Uh… just checking up. It’s raining pretty badly. Just be aware there may be a power outage if it gets worse.”

Tatta nods, Niragi grumbling angrily as Tatta hits him with a red shell in the game. “ Okay!” Tatta chirps, Aguni nodding and shutting the door just as Arisu wins the race with an excited cheer, Niragi griping loudly and falling backwards on the bed. Aguni continues down the hall and goes to check up on Chishiya to tell him about the possible outage.

But he couldn’t, as Chishiya was still sleeping, curled up in his chair and a blanket thrown over him, likely from Tatta or Arisu actually caring. Aguni leaves him alone, shutting the door. Chishiya was smart enough to infer on his own when he wakes up. He continues through the house, occasionally taking a sip of coffee as he searches for the last member of the household.

Aguni knocks on Last Boss’ door, and receives absolutely zero response, but Aguni opens anyways. Last Boss was sitting there on the ground with his computer, looking up at Aguni blankly in the dark.

“ Hey. It’s raining pretty badly so be warned.” Aguni tells him, and looks at the ground, sighing at the mess. “ And clean up your room eventually, okay?” He looks back at Last Boss, who says absolutely nothing, continuing to stare blankly at him. Aguni stares back until Last Boss breaks eye contact, going back to typing on his computer without a hint of giving a fuck. He shut the door and makes his way down to the kitchen, drinking more coffee and listening to the rain patter against the windows louder than before. He settles himself with heating up some leftovers, watching the plate spin in the microwave as he sips at his coffee.

The microwave beeps, seconds before Aguni hears thunder pounding outside. Several, in fact. It nearly shakes the house with how loud it was, and Aguni swears he can hear Niragi cursing in Arisu’s room. Aguni pulls out his leftovers and takes a seat at the dining table, just as the lights begin to flicker. Aguni takes a long, slow sip of coffee and sets down his mug, poking at a piece of fish as the lights finally die on him.

Not long after, Aguni hears footsteps, and he look up through the dark as three figures approach, Niragi loudly grumbling and heading straight for the cabinets to look for a torch. Tatta and Arisu both stand there as Niragi rustles through the drawers, Aguni eating silently as Niragi slams open and close drawers. Arisu still had the blanket over his head, which he had wrapped around him so it was basically just a blanket with a face and legs.

“ Where’s the fucking flashlight-“ Niragi grumbles, even opening the medicine cabinet. It is followed by both Arisu and Tatta shrugging and offering nothing useful, Niragi continuing to search and yielding nothing. Aguni gets up only when Niragi tries the same drawer in the past five minutes, getting up and opening the fridge, which also lost its power. He digs inside, Niragi pausing to watch Aguni in pure and utter confusion as Aguni pulls out a flashlight and sets it on the counter by Niragi, shutting the fridge and going back to the table to continue eating. “ Wh-“ Niragi stammers, looking between the flashlight and the fridge. “ Why the hell was it in the fridge-“

Aguni wished he had a sane answer. But nothing was sane about the fridgelight. He finished his coffee and sets the mug down, looking to Niragi. “ Takeru thought it’d be funny.” He explains, Niragi looking at Aguni, eyes furrowed a little and frowning.

“ Why the fuck would-“ Niragi cuts himself off, picking up the flashlight and turning it on, nearly blinding Tatta. “ Whatever. This’ll do. What, do we not have a backup generator?”

“ We used to, but rats got to the wires so we were waiting on someone to come fix it!” Tatta explains, covering his eyes with his hand as Niragi turns the bright beam at his face.

“ Aren’t you a mechanic?”

“ For cars, mostly! Also I tried, but turns out the rats got a lot of the wires all messed up. And uhhhhh….. I might have forgotten to go buy new wires. Or a new generator.”

“ You’re useless.” Niragi mutters, Tatta frowning a little.

“ Rude…. But it’ll be fine until the storm passes by, right?” Tatta looks to Aguni for confirmation, Aguni giving him a brief nod. Tatta smiles, looking back at Niragi. “ See?” “ Fine. Would’ve been nice to have electricity. I’m gonna grab candles. It’s dark as shit in here.” Niragi grumbles, and he stalks away with the flashlight, Arisu and Tatta following behind to help. Aguni stays at the table to finish his meal, existing in his own time.

A few minutes later Niragi comes back and slaps a candle on the table in front of him, already lit. “ There. Have fun with your romantic dinner for one.” Niragi quips, then quickly walks away, Aguni thanking him under his breath and taking another bite of food.

Takeru comes outside as Aguni dumps his trash, holding his phone as a flashlight, heading straight for Aguni and draping himself over the man’s back.

“ Man, it’s so loud….. You doing okay?” Takeru mumbles into Aguni’s shoulder, apparently still very tired, Aguni nodding. Takeru hums, the two standing there in the candlelit kitchen as the rain battered against the house for a while. Takeru only lets go when Aguni starts to move away, arms dropping to the side as Aguni sits down at the table again, his face illuminated by the small faint candlelight. Takeru opens the lightless fridge, the sound of things moving around barely discernible from the loud patter. He pulls out something and shuts the door, coming over to sit across Aguni. In his hand seemed to be a glass bottle, Takeru twisting off the top and taking a sip.

Aguni watches him drink for a while, Takeru draining at least half of the bottle in one go before letting off, satisfyingly breathing out and wiping his mouth with the back off his hand. The house shakes as thunder rumbles outside, Takeru smiling and yawning. “ It’s rough outside, eh? I woke up to that first one but didn’t feel like getting out of bed.” Aguni grunts in response, Hatter nodding to himself. “ Yes, yes. Ah, is the generator still not working?” Aguni shakes his head, explaining the rat situation, Hatter slowly nodding. He finishes the rest of the bottle, letting it hit the table with a decent thunk, sighing and leaning back. “ No reason to sit around and do nothing. Wanna play Monopoly with the kids?”

“ And have to wrestle Chishiya away from stabbing Niragi in the knees again with a toothpick?”

Takeru only shrugs, getting up and walking away. “ What can go wrong this time? Monopoly night! Come on everyone!”

Aguni sighs, getting up and heading over to grab the Monopoly board. He wasn’t paying for the damages.

[AN HOUR LATER….]

Aguni keeps a hold of Niragi’s torso as he attempts (and fails) to reach Tatta, who was hiding behind the blanket blob that was Arisu, who somehow acquired everyone’s blanket in the timeframe he’s been by the board, Chishiya leaning against said blob and smirking at Niragi.

“ I’m gonna tear your fucking face off, you fucking whale shark!”

“ I’m sorry! It’s just a railroad!”

Aguni glances at Takeru, who just smiles and watches, with eyes that were void of any thought in his head. He wasn’t even feeling the slightest bit worried, was he. Aguni sighs, and forcefully pulls Niragi up and lifts him over his shoulder, Niragi trying (and still failing) to get free and attack Tatta.

Aguni much rather would have just sat around and do nothing. Maybe lay in bed with Takeru and talk about life and such.

But no, instead he gets this today, Niragi finally giving up as Aguni dumps him in the time out corner and walks away back to the scene, only to see Tatta having to pay the last of his money to a smug Chishiya. “ Aww, I’m bankrupt.”

“ Should’ve thought about that before having money.” Thunder clapped just as he finished that, Tatta yelping.

“ Ooh, that was a good one!” Takeru chirps, “ Real suspenseful!”

“ Thanks, it wasn’t my intention….. Or was it.”

#aib #alice in borderland #aib fanfic #alice in borderland fanfic #aguni morizono #hatter #takeru danma #tatta kodai #arisu ryohei #niragi suguru #chishiya shuntaro #last boss #takatora samura #mmmmmm rain- #yeah this is the same universe as the vacation things #hatter + aguni and their sons #all of them

[queenofbaws]

going off your thoughts on modern horror, what are your thoughts on the modern takes to keep older horror movies alive? What are they doing well or wrong? for example: the Halloween franchise (i have only over the last 2 months watched the first of the halloween, friday 13th, and nightmare on elm street, for the first time and wow are they different to where these movies ended up)

man they sure ARE different, huh?????

as a general rule, i'm...super not a fan of most modern remakes :\ don't get me wrong - i watch 'em! i give 'em those views!!! but like. very few have worked for me.

(important note if you're gonna read my rant: i have not (YET!!!!!) seen the candyman remake, and i'm actually kind of pumped for it, so none of what i'm about to say has ANYTHING to do with the candyman remake, lol!)

in terms of what i think they're doing WELL, i think the BIGGEST piece is $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$. i am wholly of the opinion that horror should EITHER be made with a budget of $5 or a blank fucking check, and a lot of modern remakes really pour money into the movies. now, they're pouring money into them in hopes of, like you said, keeping the older cash-cow franchises ALIVE AT ALL, but like...i would be a fool and a liar to say modern remakes aren't nicer to look at. they are SO much nicer to look at. the filming tends to be so much better, the sets, the costumes, props...so much nicer to look at than the originals, nine times out of ten.

i also think - and here i COULD be wrong, but it's a sense that i've gotten, personally - that another thing they TEND to do right is remove some of the more, uhhhhh. god i don't even know how to phrase it. uncomfortable? unsavory? deeply unnecessary? gross? exploitation scenes that a lot of older horror movies have. i'm sure there are remakes that still use that shit as a crutch, but to ME, at least, i feel like i spend less time cringing, waiting for some sort of bizarre, sexually driven violence to go down in a remake than in an older horror movie. a lot a lot a LOTTTTTTT of old horror movies, especially shlocky ones, would use that shit to like ratchet up tension, and uhhhh it can ruin the viewing experience. (legit, i was going to say "example: the [x] scene in [movie]" but then i realized there are. TOO MANY. and i couldn't just pick. SO!!!)

what they're NOT doing quite as well, though. HOO. i have. opinions. for me, it sort of comes down to a few basics:

-everything needs to be gritty, nothing can be funny.

-jump-scares/loud noises instead of actual dread.

-not. being able. to just. let. go.

every. single. remake i've seen has been so focused on shit being serious and gritty and grungy and grimy and DARK, and like??? that's fine for certain things but (and i should note i'm thinking specifically of nightmare on elm street here) a HUGE part of the charm of the original movies was how NOT GRITTY THEY WERE!!!!!!! i want freddy to be grinning and making wisecracks and bad puns during every single kill, i don't want him scowling and grimacing the whole time. i don't CARE how the people from the first halloween movie are doing emotionally 30 years later, i just want to see michael myers skewer some shitty teenagers. jason's mask can be as filthy and cracked as you want, if he's not committing downright physically implausible acts of violence onto idiots who get in his way, i'm not having fun!!!!!!

i feel like horror today is SCARED of being shlocky, but shLOCK IS FUCKING FUN!!!! most of the remakes take themselves WAY too seriously, and want you to sit and ponder like, the internal trauma of the horny teenagers at the camp. personally, i don't want to ponder the internal trauma of the horny teenagers at the camp while i'm watching the movie (that's what fic's for) - i want to see glorious technicolor blood rain down in gallons and gallons as someone gets, idk, uhhhh *spins wheel and throws darts* torn in half by...a razor wire tied to a volleyball net. like, have FUN with it! you're allowed to make horror FUN!!!!!!!!! IT'S A THING YOU CAN DO!!!!!!!!

i've ranted about jump-scares a lot but like. it bears repeating, i think. jump-scares and loud noises and flashing shit and cgi faces that melt and scream at you are startling. they are surprising. gore is shocking. it is disgusting. a startle response can be PART of horror. a gag response can be PART of horror. but those alone do not horror make. i think modern remakes rely WAYYYY too heavily on those because, quite frankly, people have made it known they'll watch it, and it's like...ughhh how do i articulate this.......it's like potato chips or popcorn for your eyes - you don't have to think about it, you can just keep shoveling it thoughtlessly into your mouth. it's not an actual MEAL, it's not going to make you FULL, but like. it's buttery and salty and that's fine. i'm not saying they SHOULDN'T use jump-scares or the like, just that they're a TOOL, and they're PART of what makes something scary, and when ALL YOU HAVE is jump-scares, like???? you're missing so much of the other shit that went into making the original GREAT!!!

related to this is how i think a lot of modern horror shit tends to stray away from surrealism? if that makes sense? if you ask me, a lot of horror/fear comes from shit that just plain doesn't make sense, from ambiguity, and nowadays i think directors/writers/producers/what have you feel the need to like??? explain that shit away? like "here's WHY this bizarre thing happened!" instead of leaving it unclear and making you turn it over in your head, running through possibilities, DREADING the answer.

and finally, not being able to let go. don't get me wrong - i love the oldies. i love them. most of them. love them so much. do i think we NEED 273 halloween movies? probably not. do i think we maybe stopped having fun with jason voorhees around the time we fucking sent him to outer space? yeah. yeah i do. as much as i love the idea of new fans being brought into old franchises and experiencing those characters, like...sometimes? sometimes we have to take a deep breath and say "you know what? i don't think...this movie NEEDS to be made."

but people like making money, so. *gestures vaguely*

#corefenellie #asks #these answers are all becoming less and less cogent the closer we get to my bedtime LMAO

[phantomphangphucker]

Ectober Day 3: Mistake - How Sleeping Ghosts Lie

Danny had to get a little creative when it came to creature comforts, considering how hectic his half-life was. But that’s lead to him having some... less than human habits. Though really, when it’s common for your blankets and pillows to get set on fire, blown up, frozen, brought to life, or otherwise destroyed. It only made sense to just say ‘fuck it’ and use your own tail instead.

To say Danny was tired would be an understatement. An uhn-dr-steit-muhnt.

So he’d seriously like to sleep right now. But no. Instead he has class. With Mr. Lancer. The hardest of hard asses on him about the whole ‘pay attention’ thing. Which fine, okay, guys heart was in a superb place; but seriously, he needs sleep waaaaaaay more than Gregorian poetry and the Dadaism art movement he keeps going on tangents about for some reason.

Maybe he found a new interest to fixate on? Oh whatever.

Anyway, Danny needs sleep and he’d like to get it right now thank you very much. And he was exhausted enough to sleep right through Mr. Lancer snapping at him to wake up, kinda a nice bonus right now; bad sign for his health though. Regardless, sleepy time.

Over half the class sigh at the unmistakable sound of one Danny Fenton’s head hitting his desk. Including Mr. Lancer, who puts down the whiteboard marker and glances over his shoulder purely to make sure he was about to snap at the right student; Daniel had a pranking streak a mile long after all and had gotten other students to pretend to be asleep purely to embarrass whatever teacher blamed him without checking only to turn around and see a smug smirk across the boy’s face.

Lancer isn’t surprised in the slightest to see Daniel’s face smushed against the desk, arms positioned over his head awkwardly; boy’s going to get a kink like that, “Daniel, please try to pay attention and wake up”, tossing one of the markers near the floor by him; even the slightest sound or movement out of the unusual always woke him up with a snap. It was almost concerning actually.

Furrowing his brow when all that happens is one of Daniel’s arms flopping off his head and dangling off the edge of the desk. A couple of the teens also furrowing their brows or quirking them, some even snickering. Kwan actually kicks his feet, causing them to sick out sideways towards the window oddly; but still not waking the other teen. Star goes from giggling to actually looking genuinely concerned, sticking up her hand, “uh Mr. Lancer? Maybe we should let him sleep for once”.

Jesse leans back, snorting, “yeah, he’d say that he’s ‘dead to the world’”. Mr. Lancer just sighs in the slacker's direction, Jesse was a more genuine problem child; she just didn’t care at all, unlike Daniel. Though he guesses if Daniel is really that tired he can let this slip for once. This is still going on the test though.

Five minutes go by with the class going on effectively like normal; every one more than a little pleased by the fact that Danny doesn’t snore. Sure the desk was definitely covered in drool, but that was only annoying for the janitor.... or who ever poor freshman who doesn’t know any better and sits there. Everyone made a point to remember where that boy sat and promptly never sat in that desk. Considering the tendencies for questionable stains and the fact that it can to bloody well life before, everyone’s agreed that’s a wise decision. Last year one of the freshmen even got bit by meat, or something, stuck under it.

And combining that with the desk's occupant having a tendency to constantly disappear, most people paid at least some attention to him/the desk. Even if it was only out of curiosity or paranoia. Didn’t help that in classes where the teachers had totally given up any pretence of controlling the boy he had a free pass to just leave without any warning or asking. Which sure, lead to less disruptions and Danny not looking like a stressed-out chihuahua. But it also led to the boy seemingly literally disappearing. One minute he’s there, the next gone; everyone pretty sure no one actually saw him leave. Though someone did catch him crawling out the window once.

Kwan especially had a tendency of keeping a general eye on Danny’s desk in English class, considering he always seemed to be seated directly across from the strange teen. Which yes, had given him the ability to use the excuse ‘Danny’s desk ate it’ in all seriousness and actually be believed. It had also given him the unforgettable experience of being right next to a randomly exploding desk once though. So he thinks things might be evened out.

Regardless, he keeps an eye on that desk... and literally anything Danny laid next to it. Nothing today though, which was hopefully a positive sign.

Or did he bring stuff? Kwan honestly can’t remember. Eh might as well check. He’d rather not have another ‘ecto-pistol in the bag and accidentally pointed at his head but thankfully just blasted apart the ceiling when it accidentally went off’ incident. Waiting till Mr. Lancer looks back to the board yet again to write more shit no one cares about except the nerds, to glance to the side and back forwards.

Yup. No bag. Good. But then he pauses and squints at the whiteboard, because yeah no definitely no bag but was something not right? He thinks something was not right. Ah Zone, this better not be another ‘living desk’ moment. Risking another quick glance, which only makes him even more confused. Because the desk was fine. Danny was... not? He was still asleep that’s for sure, but Kwan’s pretty sure Danny has two legs and two feet, and neither were that thick.

Needless to say Kwan immediately snaps his head back towards Danny, no longer giving half a damn if Mr. Lancer notices or not. Looks down and proceeds to blatantly stare, eyes wide and mouth popping open a little. What.... what the.... what the fuck??? No seriously, what??? Kwan’s eyes move a little, following the motion of the tail? As it does a little lazy swish across the ground and slightly in the air. A bit of it is even curled under Danny’s head like a pillow, man it’s long.

Kwan shakes his head a little and slowly inches his shoe over and gives it -him?- a little poke. Attempting to confirm if this is real. Glancing at the sleeping teens face as Danny shifts slightly and the tail? -seriously, what the ever-loving fuck???- moves slightly out of the way.

Alright. Real it is.

Kwan blinks, just to make extra sure he hasn’t gone insane or started hallucinating out of extreme poetry-induced boredom. Opening his mouth more and blurting out, “Fenton... what the fuck man”.

Mr. Lancer sighs, speaking towards the whiteboard, “language, Mr. Ishiama”, turning to actually face one of the ‘prized’ -more like idolised- football stars, and seeing the teen paying absolutely zero attention; instead he’s staring dumbfounded at Daniel. Which... isn’t promising. Unsurprisingly, like whenever some kind of Daniel-related disturbance happened, the entire class turns to look to the teen at Kwan’s words. Mr. Lancer, of course, does the same, but he likes to think his reasons were more positive.

Lancer drops the marker he was holding to the ground, turning around fully to face the class with raised eyebrows, “Lord Of The Flies!”. It doesn’t take anything more than that to get the rest of the class going. Some even getting up or falling out of their chairs.

“Holy Shit Fenton”.

“Uh, should we wake him?”.

“Okay seriously, that can’t be normal? Right? RIGHT?”.

“His does have that weird ecto-contamination though?”.

“Oh my... it’s actually kinda... cute?”.

“Ecto-contamination my ass, he doesn’t have legs”.

“Hahaha hahah ha he looks like a Naga”.

“Shut up nerd”.

“I wonder if he even knows?”.

“I mean, this has to be a ghostly ecto thing?”.

“How the shit wouldn’t he?”.

“How do you think, moron. Maybe this just happens when he sleeps?”.

“I bet his freak parents are to blame. Probably some experiment gone wrong”.

“HA. That would track”.

“Maybe a ghost pranked him and stole his legs?”.

“That’s stupid”.

“Wonder of he could, like, hold stuff with it”.

“I’ll show you stupid”.

At that point Lancer has to step forward to stop the minor brawl that’s starting, “enough, Wuthering Heights, no fighting in class”, pushing Lily and Emily apart; who scowl at each other. Looking to Daniel, at this point basically everyone is standing up and around Daniel’s desk; unabashedly staring at or poking the occasionally swishing wiggling tail. Some was curled around his waist, some of it on the floor, some underneath his head, and the tip was just flicking in the air. There’s honestly no point in even trying to get class back on track. Reaching out to grab and shake the teen's shoulder, hopefully he’s not passed out enough to ignore that.

Half the class either gapes, jumps back, or laughs when, on the fourth slightly aggressive shake, Danny one arm judo flips or something Mr. Lancer over him and into the wall. The tail completely uncurling and waving lazily on the floor.

“HOLY SHIT!”.

“Damn Danny. Okay then”.

“Well, that just happened”.

“Oh man. Hahahaha. That was awesome”.

“Fenton? How the?”.

Mr. Lancer rights himself with little effort, slightly used to this after years in ‘the most haunted city in the world’. That, and Daniel’s chucked him across a room once before to get him out of the way of some debris. Daniel however, jerks to be sitting upright, the tail? lashes violently into one of the desk legs sending the entire desk flipping onto its side; with Daniel included.

Danny rubs the side of his head while yawning and pushing himself up with one arm, “what the Zone guys?”, and then looks around at all the teens just... staring at him. “Uhhhhh. I didn’t, like, blow something up again, did I?”.

Kwan blinks at him, “Fenton man, how can you not know why we’re all looking at you like you just walked off the set for the fucking Exorcist”.

Star seemingly takes a bit of pity on their strangest classmate, “Danny hon, your tail’s showing”, sounding weirdly unfazed by all this. But the entire class facepalms when the boy blushes and moves to cover his crotch of all things.

Though Mr. Lancer can understand the boy’s reasoning, considering he lost his pants so often as a freshman that Lancer literally bought Daniel a belt and kept a spare for him on hand at all times.

But Danny moving to do that gets him to finally, finally, notice shit is supremely not normal. He screws up his eyebrows, actually mutters, “well that don’t seem right, considering the circumstances”, and looks down.

No one says anything for a bit while Danny blinks down at the tail, everyone watching it swish around lazily. Danny looks back up to everyone, and only has this to say for himself, “uhhhhhh”.

Kwan flops back down into his desk and laughs, “man, is that seriously all you’re gonna give us? You sprouted a ghost tail in the middle of class!”.

“Yeah!”.

“You don’t even seem surprised. Figures”.

“So... your parents fucked you up.... again”.

“Language”.

“Oh come on! This has to be a prank”.

“You’ve got to say more than that”.

“You know what? Fuck this shit. I don’t even want to know”.

“Pussy”.

“Fuck off”.

“Language, Todd”.

“Can you even walk right now?”.

“How? No really. How?”.

“Of course can’t walk, he doesn’t have legs. You need those to walk, moron. It’s a basic requirement actually”.

Lancer sighs, pushing a few students away from Daniel before looking to the teen, “are you alright, Daniel? Do you... need to go to the nurse for... this”, and gestures at the tail; attempting not to seemed freaked out.

Danny immediately shakes his head and waves his hands back and forth; easily sitting up on the tail like this is nothing new, “no! No! I’m fine! All good!”.

Mr. Lancer just sighs as nearly the entire class shouts, “BULLSHIT!”, and do some variation of staring or pointing at the boy’s tail. Which, while being reasonable reactions, isn’t allowed on school grounds.

Danny laughs awkwardly, glancing back at the tail and back up, “heh”, the tail coiling up under and behind him some. That just encourages more questions though.

“Oh! So you can actually control it”.

“How’s it attached to your nerves and stuff though?”.

“Oh Zone, another nerd alert?”.

“It’s reasonable! This is illogical!”.

“Objection!”.

“What?”.

“Nothing. I just really wanted to say that”.

“Why’d you even form it?”.

“Oh! Oh! If you can do this then can we?!?! Is this just an contamination thing?”.

“Okay point. What’s the use of this thing and especially while sleeping?”.

“Oh mi god yas girl! I would look so cute with a ghost tail!”.

“Oh I know girl!”.

“Right!”.

“Oh someone gag me”.

“Sure”.

“Someone other than you”.

“What’s it feel like?”.

Daniel mutters to the side, “whelp. I fucked up. Nice going Fenton”. But Mr. Lancer’s pretty sure he’s the only one that even heard that as the students pretty well start bickering with each other or asking Daniel questions without actually paying him any mind or just staring at the tail. Which is frankly, rude. But it does give Lancer a chance to ask, in a much quieter tone, “are you sure you’re alright?”. Daniel nods at him immediately and gives a small, confident though shaky, smile. Lancer nods right back before standing up, if he didn’t have to question Daniel’s oddness then it was honestly better not to question it at all.

Mr. Lancer stands up and looks around at the other teens, “alright everyone, now I know there’s no point in picking back up where we left off, but everyone at the very least sit back down for the last few minutes”, sighing to himself when only the ‘good’ students do as asked, “if you give him some space he might, might, actually answer something”; that gets everyone sitting down real quick.

Mr. Lancer walks back to his own desk and practically collapses into his chair, watching Daniel very awkwardly right his desk and pull himself up back into his seat. Lancer wants to know why he hasn’t changed back to, you know, legs. Or if he even can. He should probably call the Fenton’s honestly. But, Catcher In The Rye, he so doesn’t want to. Really doesn’t want to. But if he can’t have legs, then he was going to have to. But if he asks then everyone will bombard the boy again. They were staring at him enough as it was and that... tail wasn’t exactly hiding his discomfort. Considering how it was all coiled up over itself in the boy’s seat.

Danny looks around, leans back, and then slams his head into his desk, grumbling, “y’all aren’t gonna leave me alone unless I explain this, are you?”.

“Are you kidding Fenton? No”.

“Hahaha, obviously”.

“Oh come on, why wouldn’t you want to brag about this?“.

“Maybe because this is freaky and he’s a freak?”.

“Rechenbache, that’s enough”.

Danny sighs into the desk top before sitting back up right and letting the tail uncoil. Grumbling, “ugh. Why couldn’t I just have stayed in bed?”, shaking his head and looking at the class, “okay this-”, sticking his hand out a bit, the class watching the tip of the tail move to lay in his open palm, “-is normal for me”, shrugging awkwardly, “kinda common thing while asleep”, grumbling almost aggressively, “which I’m now realising was a major mistake to get into the habit of”.

Star blinks at him before giggling, “so you just sleep with a ghost tail? Why? Is kinda cute though”, a couple less stuck up girls nod and glance at each other; nodding more. That just makes Danny blush and mutter incoherently.

Larry sticks his arms out to the side, “that still doesn’t answer the ‘how’?”.

“Yeah!”.

“Is that all you know how to say?”.

“Heck that doesn’t even answer the why!”.

“Uh, yeah? Yeah it does. Fenton was asleep”.

“That’s not what I mean, dumbass”.

“Language”.

“I second the ‘why’. Why sleep with that?”.

“And honestly dude? You constantly sleep in class. How did you not think this was gonna happen if it’s so routine”.

Danny scowls and rolls his eyes, “oh can it”, sighing, “and ‘cause it’s comfy alright? Geez. My sleeping routines are none of y’alls business”.

Kwan sticks up a finger, “uh, actually you kinda make it our business by sleeping in class”.

“Fuck off”.

“Daniel”.

Danny rolls his eyes at Mr. Lancer before addressing the class again, “and it’s just ‘cause of my ecto. You know my shit’s weird, stop being surprised when it proves it’s weird”.

Kwan sputters at that, “man, full-on ghost body parts and disappearing legs is beyond weird”.

Danny shrugs, not even attempting to deny that fact, “portable pillow and blankets that can’t be blown up. Plus, it helps me shed excess ecto. Y’all just shed your smaller amounts through your skin, lame”.

“Huh, that actually makes sense”.

“Still weird you even do that man”.

“Wow. Being ecto-absorbent seems like a real pain”.

“So breathing, but for ecto”. That one earns a couple laughs, including from Danny.

“Guess living in the ecto house that would make sense”.

“Honestly man? I would say you should just wear those hideous anti-ecto jumpsuits”, practically everyone cringes, “but, y’ know, hideous”.

“Capital ‘H’ Hideous”.

“Zone! I’d rather a freaking tail over those suits too”.

“Are we all still ignoring that this shouldn’t be possible and is still illogical?”.

“Shut up, Larry. Nobody loves you”.

“Thing looks long enough you really could, like, pull it up and use it as a pillow”.

“That’s literally what Fenton-dude was doing”.

“Shut up, I wasn’t the one staring at him while he sleeps”.

Brittney perks up, “do you sleep like a cat? You know, all curled up?”, tilting her head, “it was all curled under you just a bit ago”. That earns more blushing from Danny, making quite a few girls giggle and effectively confirming that yes, yes he did. Danny just mutters, “it’s comfy”, again. Which only results in even more giggles.

Danny looks up at the sound of the bell, flops his tail to the ground, and the entire class just watch in awe as the tail solidifies and splits into regular ol’ jean-covered legs and red/white sneakers. Half the class muttering ‘woah’, while he just gets up and very obviously makes a beeline for the door. Lancer’s just glad he can walk. Danny pointing at the class without actually looking at anyone or slowing down, “maybe don’t go telling everyone about this yeah?”.

Needless to say, everyone told everyone. Though Mr. Lancer told the other teachers that the strange new rumour surrounding Daniel was yet another practical joke. Which, with Daniel, was absolutely believable. And one thing no one does, is tell the Fenton’s. Which is all Danny had honestly hoped for.

End.

#ectober #ectober 2020 #ectober2020 #danny phantom #phandom #mistake #danny fenton #kwan #mr. lancer #star #ghostly tail #habits #habits out here biting us in the ass #reveal #let danny sleep #tired! danny #your classmates dead shenanigans #the enigma that is one danny fenton #the quirks of being a halfa #danny's piss poor just terrible shitty awful luck #my writing #fan fic #phan phic #phantomphangphucker #have a fic suck my dick

[weirdo-with-a-nametag]

Brain is tv static with random frames interspersed

Think I'm like. Really stressed and jumping between topics to try and find something that helps / feels good

Topics:

Anyone know a good health tracking app for adhd people? I want one that like pops up when you open your phone, maybe? But is unobtrusive. Like maybe you just rate your mood or whatever when you open your phone, and it closes, and you go about your business. I just hate every app and paper method I've tried but really want to track some stuff

Pigeon. ? Pigeon as pet?

Service animals re: cats, pigeons, my cat specifically, and then also ESAs and also what to use as treats while training my cat (he's pretty happy to learn behaviors with praise and pets as reinforcement, but treats would make everything move much faster, but I haven't found something I want to give him so we've just been y'know. Chillin)

Service animals re: what tasks can my pet potentially do that would help me? I don't really know a lot about service animals and there is a Huge range. If anyone has suggestions, or places to read about it, I'd appreciate it! Mostly thinking they may help with anxiety, sensory, and mobility/fatigue related stuff. Not much of a need for medical alerts.

Bioactive enclosures for my snakes, need to research their biomes and make progress on designs and equipment specifications

Also. Hit a seriously hard patch and haven't been handling them much at all this month so that's not great

Casting stuff. Saw jewelry today made of metal casts of claws, skulls, etc, and they were really well done and made me want to do that

Some taxidermy / vulture culture stuff I won't get into right now

Puzzles????

How to organize my room

Need a shower

Need to organize bathroom

So Much Schoolwork

Uhhhhh trying, but not making much headway, to figure out how I want to do my music collection. Also really need to clean my records..

Make?

Food??? Ew.

Dental hygiene ://

Plampts. So many. Houseplants need maintenance, many need repotting. Keep taking in people's problem plants and like, they're doing better, largely, after being trimmed and watered and whatnot, but need repotting. Also need to trim some aquarium plants.

Also need to put water in tanks. And spray nepenthes.

Laundry.

Gotta pick up trash in my room. There's so much. Everywhere. Why.

Schoolwork. I'm so behind. So, so stuck. Kind of feel like I'm dying.

Going on a picnic tomorrow. Have to figure out what still needs doing for that, probably need to go to the store.

Leo needs water. I'm so....ugh, I'm trying so hard, but it feels impossible. I do my best to take good care of my pets, and I think they live pretty good lives most of the time, but sometimes I get like This and completely drop off the face of the earth and then like, wake up or whatever and two weeks have passed by and I have not cleaned a water bowl! That's a serious problem!!!! I do not know how to combat that, really, besides more reminders. Having someone around who is willing to like, help, when things are especially hard, would be great, but I don't live with my partner right now and do not feel like I can ask anyone here for that. But I can't put my animals at risk. I check on them every day, and if their bowls are dirty I do take them out and clean them, but sometimes (like now) i cannot get myself to do it without a pressure like a dirty bowl, or a feeding day. And like, it's really important that they have clean water. I'm talking to myself here but like, if anyone has advice. Please. With the tank redesigns and upgrades, the bowls will be more accessible, which will help because one of them is very heavy at the angle I have to pick it up, and another requires moving a lot of branches and is best to take out while the snake is out (this is Leo) which is fine because I love my boy, but adds time to the process, and makes it harder to start, you know? Maybe if I just got more bowls - I could take the bowl out and immediately replace it, fill the new one, and replace the decor and snake, and then clean the bowl as a separate task? That would be easier for my brain. Currently I have a Specific bowl I prefer to use for each tank, and then everything else is Just In Case, but I mean. Acquiring extras is something I want to do anyway, and it may help with several problems, so. Yeah. I'll try that. But also, any other ideas, guys?

Anxiety: can't stop picking at my face, skin, nails, cuticles, scalp, pretty much everywhere with callouses, also scratched a mole off my face, which is something I've been trying Not to do for a while, so that's...not great. Can't find my earmuffs, and also all of my headphones are painful? Ears are really sensitive lately.

Been playing a lot of Moth Game (flutter: starlight if you wanna be friends say hey I don't know how to do it but would enjoy talking about moths if nothing else. The game is just like, an idle ish collecting game with cutesy versions of different species, and very little actual information, but it's still fun, and if anyone else is on there and also Into Moths like I am, hiiiii) and like it's fun and cute but also greatly impacting my productivity, and raises my stress levels during events, which is most days, so the game has. Not been helping. But I can't stop because then I'll miss Exclusive Moths.

Anyway. Had baklava and two mugs of Thai tea today and the sugar has made me nauseous.

Trying to journal. Hurts to write. Also takes too long. Also my handwriting is very bad. But typing is..not as good

Want to draw. Thinking about drawing cats

Plants again! Want to make seed bombs, have seeds, have most of the other ingredients, just need to put em together, basically.

Really sad :(

Or am I?

Weird noise coming from dining room?

Birds. Spent half an hour at least on the deck tonight listening to a hundred different bird calls (literally) to identify one I was hearing, it was a pine siskin, which I checked early on but the recording was bad and I didn't realize which call was identified. Anyway, cool to put a name to a face, so to speak.

Need to practice for ASL

So much.....to do...

Only had like >3 hours of work this week which was not great because money, but also like I'm really feeling those 3 hours....

My cat is basically refusing to come into my room? Which is very strange and I'm worried something is Off but cannot figure out what. Also means less cuddles which means I'm sad.

It feels strange whenever people follow me, the attention is nice but I have no idea what content y'all are here for. So to everyone: hi, enjoy, hope my random personal posts aren't a surprise to anyone who followed for like. News reblogs and informational stuff.

Do I even have it in me to..be successful in school? Should I drop out of college? I'm struggling really hard and do not feel like I'm building on the skills I need to continue, so like. Uh.

My dad is being. Abrasive.

Mom and grandma are very angry lately

Housemate is also angry, about things i thought we were on good terms about, so I am stressed because like,, are we okay?

Can't find my eye mask :(

Yoga? Like...restorative yoga? Need to track down my PT stuff. And. Do it.

Need to put the stickers on my license plates....oops...

Still haven't found my antidepressants! Yay!

Do I want to store my stuff in open bins, or with lids? Which stuff needs spill protection and stacking capability and which stuff needs easy access?

How to earn money without..chaos

Gotta go to the pet store tomorrow. Have to compile my list of pet store items i need. Uhhhhhhhhhh

Also I have an essay due tomorrow that I've barely started. So. Wooooooo

Kt tape for supporting arches / inner ankles? I keep messing up my ankles, and part of it is walking wrong because I don't have the energy to engage the muscles in my feet/legs right to like, avoid injury, and part of it is I just need new shoes inserts. But i wear slippers a lot and they do not have arch support and it hurts. PT to help with this also but Where Is It

Family can't seem to get dish soap I can use, so I've just been having to avoid washing anything by hand, or being in the general kitchen area while anyone uses the stuff, which has led to more of my dishes sitting out, and more conflict over dishes. Lovely.

How hard is it for parents to learn they have to respect boundaries? Very hard, apparently. And you're supposed to just sort of remind people, and explain, over and over and over but like at this point my self worth is actually pretty good and the lifetime of proof that they do not want to listen? That's making me want to stop trying. Like, if you're not going to respect my boundaries I'm just not going to involve you in my life. I'm not talking to my dad right now because of this. Maybe I'll decide to lay things out to him, again and again and again again, maybe not. And I'm comfortable saying that's on him.

How to drink water

Am I dehydrated or are my hands just completely callous now. My fingertips have such hard skin. Why? It's uncomfortable. This is part of why I've been biting them.

Also testosterone. Been having a lot of trouble doing my shots, because anxiety and physical freakouts, but also not feeling super urgent about it. Which I'm realizing may be a sign i need to look at the effects so far and the possible effects of continuing, and see what they make me feel. It's possible I'm where I want to be as far as T, and don't really want to stay on it. A big thing for me is a deeper voice, so it seems time to take a look at whether I like my voice where it is or want to see if it'll drop any more. Etc etc

Miss my lil sisters

Saw a lot of cool rocks today. Huge (like hand sized) ammonite for $28. May go back and buy one because. Wow.

Want to plant food plants

Also my natives. Whole garden plot standing empty with a bunch of stuff waiting in nursery pots, needing to go in the ground. Because I can't get out of bed. Love that. Stuff is dying out there, I'm dying in here, there's a poetry to it and I do not want to romanticize suffering so I will say this: I brought a Bucket full of moss home a month ago and planted it and now go outside sometimes to drench my moss and it is very rewarding because the stuff is just so green. Incredible. When the rest of my plants are finally in the ground, that feeling will only intensify. But, for now, the moss is very nice.

Made a glow in the dark bead lizard from memory during therapy yesterday, and I love him. Also, still struggling with bringing up autism and psychosis topics with my therapist. Still very worried about. Things. Would like to get a new person? But sometimes she is helpful? And we have a routine. It's very hard to break the routine. Maybe I can set some time aside during the summer, to figure out what to do there.

Term ends in a couple weeks. The task of catching up, of passing, seems impossible. I really need to pass my courses. I'm on academic warning, because my GPA is lower than it should be, and if I can pass all of my classes this term I can get off academic warning but otherwise I'm not sure what will happen to my financial aid.

My phone is playing the same 50-100 songs on shuffle and I don't even particularly like most of them and it is very strange

Got my face wipes! Hooray, i can wash my face again

Been eating too much sugar in general. It's making my joints hurt more, and the nausea

Pet a dog the other day. I miss that. It would be really nice to have a dog in the house again. The exuberance, the cuddles, the tail wagging, the walks... I'd really like that. Maybe once I'm out in my room, tanks and catio built and everyone is situated, I'll look into getting a dog instead of a cat next. Was planning on holding off in case I'm not physically able to take them out on walks and such, but I've been pretty successful at doing this job, and I think that my main hurdle for walking really is motivation. Dog walking is a strong motivator for me. Best to start by fostering, or just do Wag, for a while though. I'm feeling overwhelmed with my current responsibilities, and here I am talking about getting a dog. Good job, me

How do you get wax off of somewhat water soluble rocks? My housemate broke my lava lamp on some of my rock collection and I am not sure how to get some of them clean without damage.

I am...pretty sure there are collared doves nesting over my room but it seems they're less common around here than I thought? But they are..pretty distinctive. Like if I'm wrong, what are those birds. Some very distinctly colored feral pigeons? Who are nesting here, in a tree, without their flock, and who happen to have pretty much the exact same pattern?

Probably should go to the dollar store and get some bins for organizing

Been wanting to keep a bin by the door and stock it with stim/fidget stuff people can just .have ..like extras of some of my favorites and other things i can get ahold of, to offer to my friends who haven't really had the chance to explore the world of stim toys

Hands are really just not doing great the last several weeks. Arthritis type pain cropping up more and more in all the little joints, making it hurt more to write, type, or just use them for whatever. Coordination isn't great because of that distraction, and because my hands/arms are slow to respond and kinda weak. Most people would say I'm not using them enough but I've been doing 15ish hours of manual labor per week, so maybe it's the other direction? More water would help. If only it wasn't so heavy.

I haven't taken a single shower since I started my job. Which was March 29th. That's not great.

Practiced parallel parking today. 10/10 still very bad at it.

Having anxiety that my friends think I'm lying about things, faking, and are watching me to see if I'll slip up. So that sucks. Can either talk about that directly or indirectly, or just shut up about those things until I can get my brain under control again. I'm not sure right now if the reassurance would work as a reality check or make me believe it more, right now, so might hold off on the talking bit for a little while.

Saw, smelled, picked a couple pretty roses. Good times

At this point I'm just trying to list all my thoughts so that maybe I'll be able to sleep and not worry I'll forget

My mom has put her spider plant on the deck, and it has maybe five living leaves. I have no idea how she killed such a well established spider plant, the last time I saw it it was so happy. Did she stick it in a corner and forget to water it? Whatever happened, it is now in the Plant ER, so hopefully I'll be able to...help get it on the up and up again

Leo is such a pretty noodle. He's so pretty. He's posing. Hi, baby boy.

Oh, he saw me moving around and decided to come say hi. Sorry little man, i did not mean to disturb you. Please resume lounging. I can't bring you out right now, I'm trying to sleep.

Also, terrariums. Water features. Need to ask. Someone. The one who was making that super cool garter snake enclosure and blogging the progress? With the lazy river and pool? About maintenance on that kind of setup. My milk snake really enjoys water, and I'd love to put a water feature in his tank. But I'm unclear on how to keep it clean, or honestly where to start. Don't want any huge falls or anything, though it actually may not make the humidity too high if I did maybe a small drip wall into the pool? That seems like something he would enjoy, and a good way to support different types of plants. But like, that's the thing, it's bioactive and I haven't done that before and no amount of research is ever enough.

Oh, Shogun has a dirt hat. How cute. I love when they do that

See, this is the thing. My snakes make me so happy. All three of them are actually hanging out where I can see them from my bed right now, and it's really nice. I want their lives to be the best possible, and I think I have the resources to do that. Which is so exciting. Now if only my brain and body would cooperate. It would hurt quite a lot to have to re-home any of them, but the most important thing is their health and quality of life, you know? If I can't get my act together somewhat, it may be that one or all of them would be better off with another keeper. I don't know. It's just, i talk about all these tank ideas and all this husbandry standards stuff but how much of it actually gets applied to my own animals whose lives are in my hands? How well am I caring for them, really?

Oh!!! My red thread! I thought that was gone forever.

Anyway, please do not worry. My snakes are healthy. I pay attention, and watch for signs of illness, and they're okay. There will always be places to improve, and the water is a big one, but most of the time i change their water out frequently, I'm just worried because of bad depression and fatigue times, you know? I'm working on making the most self sustaining systems i can, in part so that I am sure they'll be okay if I mess up sometimes. Just saying this because I hope you guys don't feel like you need to worry about the welfare of my pets. They're okay, i just always want better for them, is all.

Anyway, the sun is coming up and I should probably go to sleep. So uh, thanks for reading, if you read all of this randomness, and if anyone has thoughts or advice on anything in this post, i would welcome it! Good night!

#mine #long post #snakes #pets #food m #uhhhhhhhhhhhh whatever else needs tagging

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary57

11/7-8/2023

tuesday - wednesday

not a boring day, today.

i ate leftovers from yesterday and had leftover ramen that my gf didn't finish. i also ate candy and stuff and it's made me feel sort of sick, or at least like, sick with myself. but whatever. thursday is errand day but i don't think i'm going then. idk what i'm doing tomorrow, i'm probably going to try and record more, today i got 2 songs re-recorded basically, i think i'll like them a lot more when i slot those parts in and stuff. what else. mostly i vc'd today with a friend who was super deliriously drunk, and a friend who was not drunk our drunk friend got on this thing, of digging through his steam library for all of these dumb games he had. there was this one about a courier frog, we all were amazed and charmed by the shitty unity effort it was, and how there was this giant transformer running in circles for no reason, a crime scene, the frog held a knife, and a man on a roof. all unrelated to the game, or really even its setting, a row of 8 houses in a suburb, a shitty prefab full of invisible walls. for some reason that game made me want to play videogames more again. things are mysterious that way. seeing him get drunker, and play other games, made me want to play games less though. he was so drunk, thus out of it, while playing a puzzle game called chuzzle, he was getting really, i don't know, i don't know if he was for real frustrated or doing a joke where he was acting frustrated and crazy, by this time the vc had filled up more, the person who introduced him to the server we're in joined and i haven't vc'd w/ her in forever, a friend who is intermittently around in vc joined for a minute too, all while our drunk friend was sat there, staring at his screen, manic and silent, playing a kind of weird and cruel version of bejeweled where you torture strange creatures, made up of hair and eyes. he stayed on that game for like an hour. then he moved onto some other puzzle game that was like, you move blocks around a non-environment, it looked like lame mahjong tiles. anyways he was pretty good at that one and then hit the difficulty bump, and was still basically good but also drunk and still doing his frustrated guy bit, he did some stuff i feel bad about, i was writing it out but there's no reason to do that i think, i can't tell if it was a bit or not, or where it ends, if him feeling free to do some stuff as a bit is just him being able to actually just do certain things for real or not. he did start what i hope was a fake crying thing, where he was like, doing this intense fake ugly cry face, at least i hope it was fake, i asked our friend who knows him irl and she said he is just being a #mastermanipulator but i honestly can't tell still and feel bad basically because i was having a go at him being bad at a puzzle, not really mean i was just saying like "you're making the wrong shape." i don't know. it was funny hearing him say really slurred nonsense, and then say to us all, "can't you be quiet." or "shut your trap" and stuff like that. it was still a little stressful. i dunno. alcohol is kind of nightmarish to me, at least he had people around a while, so it wasn't totally drinking alone. or he was drunk alone but had some people beside him, to make it less soul-destroying. the people i knew who would do that were really really worrying. the vc was a lot of fun though, it's tragic how it makes me snack though, i love to eat salty trash while vcing. i am also just generally so hungry, always.

outside of that, uhhhhh, nothing really, it's a lot of just bullshitting about random stuff in those vcs, i keep thinking about watching this dogra magra movie. maybe i'll try that rn. thinking about the progress on the album, it's feeling closer and closer, i wonder how much closer i can get, if i keep re-recording stuff i'm maybe not happy with this week, that'd be good, but i wonder if i'd feel closer if i tried getting some lyrics out for these newer songs. or they do have lyrics, some at least, those ones are recorded thoughhhhhhhhhghghgh. i dunno. i think by the end of this week i should take a closer inventory of where these songs are, i should also try getting the vocals down for one of these older songs w/ lyrics. as it stands, there's a couple songs i want to still master differently, really minor guitar tone things i think. thennnn, there's one i definitely want to do some minor arranging on to get one part to be less fucked up, or maybe not arranging, just come in differently w/ vox, add an additional guitar bit. and then there's still one i for sure need to get the vocals right on, or a couple i guess.

anyway i watched like half of it i have to finish it 2morrowww, so

byebye!!!!!!!!!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #349

“we’ll meet again, when both our cars collide”

When was the last time you had a PopTart? It's been many, many months. Do you like hot chocolate? Well duh. Who made you laugh the hardest today? I haven't really laughed today. Who was the last person to promise you something, and what was it? Hmph. Would you ever jump into a fire to save your bestfriend? I know I would. Do you have a callus from writing too much? No, I only have calluses on my feet from when I used to walk for hours on end. They just never permanently went away, even with grooming. Who is someone you’ve made a bad first impression on? I dread to guess what the girl Jason dated after me was told about me. I shouldn't care at all, but I do. I have every reason to accurately be defined as "the crazy ex," and I fucking hate it. Who is your best guy friend? Girt, a friend from high school. Do you read cereal boxes while you’re eating? I did as a kid, but now I don't. I just kinda stand and eat. What’s the last thing you accidentally (or purposely) burnt? I kinda burnt the roof of my mouth on pizza the other night. Do you know anyone with a lip piercing? Me, haha. I know others, too. What did the last tattoo you saw, look like? I don't remember. Have you ever given birth? NO FUCKING THANK YOU. Do you enjoy making out? I mean if I'm in the mood to and I love you, yeah. Why exactly do you take surveys? "I genuinely like doing them and they’re great for venting and sorting out thoughts and whatnot. I can just ramble and get things off my chest." <<<< This right here covers it. As well, it's just a boredom killer. And I happen to be bored very, very often. Rockband or Gutair Hero? Both are great, why choose just one? What are you listening to right now? Halocene's cover of "Helena" by My Chemical Romance. It's beautiful. What kind of energy drinks do you drink, if any? None, because I just can't do energy drinks. They taste like pure poison to me. Have you ever been swimming in a river? No. Swimming in a river sounds pretty dangerous... Does your alarm clock wake you with music, or with an annoying buzz sound? Music. When you broke stuff in the house as a child, did you blame it on siblings? I'm hoping you don't mean breaking deliberately, 'cuz I wasn't that kind of kid. But anyway, I don't believe I did. Did you make it all the way through the Oregon Trail game? Yes. I was obSESSED with those games as a kid. Lions and tigers and bears, oh my! Which one are you more scared of? Tigers, probably. They're so stealthy and, while I may be entirely wrong, seem like the top candidate of the three to attack a human, be it for food or defense. And have you SEEN the muscles on a tiger? Christ. Describe the best use that you’ve found for duct tape: Uh, taping things lmao. Do you wrap gifts or use gift bags? I use gift bags, because I can't wrap for shit. What fast food place do you avoid at all costs? Arby's is really gross to me. Are you afraid of deep sea creatures? Just giant squid... *shudders* Have you ever agreed to purchase something on Ebay and got scammed somehow? No. I did, however, purchase something on deviantART and never got the product. It was going to be a present for Jason. In dA's defense though, I've bought like... two or three other things from there, and there were zero issues. It's really about the people you trust. If you get a call that says “Unknown”, do you answer it? Nnnnope. Do you have any bobble head figures? No. Have your parents ever left you somewhere without realizing it? I don't think so. Have you ever been in a tanning bed? No. Did your last kiss mean anything to you? Well yeah, I wouldn't have kissed her otherwise. Would you say that you have a nice smile? No; I've been self-conscious of it since I was a kid, mostly because one of my eyes looks more squinty than the other, but they both are to me. I've always said I look high when I smile lmao. Is there an ex you want to make up with? My mind immediately screams "Jason," but I know that's a horrendous idea. Our last talk ended peacefully and even with care and good wishes, and I need my fucking impenetrable head to accept that's where it needs to end. He does NOT need to re-enter my life. It would be so bad for me. Do you remember how you felt on 9/11? I have no memory of it, if I'm being honest. What outfit makes you feel the most attractive? None. Other than yourself, who knows you the best? Really? Whoever reads these lmao. What’s one complaint that you have about school? Common Core and how every student's school experience was not tailored towards their unique goals. Like they try to cram a shitload of identical and usually useless information into a kid's brain to make them a jack of all trades, you could say, but not enough information they need to properly pursue their career future. It causes such an unnecessary amount of frustration and stress. I have many, many complaints about the education system, but this one tops the list. What do you do while you’re on campus but not in class? Back in college, I would just do stuff on my laptop. Do you know anyone who has Autism/Asperger’s syndrome? Yes. Are you open to a same-sex relationship and why or why not? Well, considering I'm bisexual... Do you remember life without the internet? No. Have you ever found yourself to be ugly? I've gone my entire life thinking I'm ugly, if I'm being real. What is your state’s minimum wage? $7.25 a fucking hour. :'''''') Is there something you want to say to someone but can’t/won’t? There's a few people. What is your first memory of being in a hospital? Considering my mom worked at the local hospital when I was a kid, I remember being there quite, quite young, playing with my older sister in Mom's and her coworkers' room. I think Nicole was too young to really "play." Do you have any relatives with red hair? No. What is something good that has happened to you in the past week? I got my first Covid vaccine. My arm hurts like a motherfucker now, but to protect my mom, it's worth it. Please get vaccinated. How much was the rent/mortgage at the cheapest place you’ve ever lived? That's never been my business. Have you ever been to a gay pride parade? No, but I would go to a local one if I could actually walk five feet without being in serious pain and sweating like a pig. Do you still keep in touch with your very first best friend? We're friends on Facebook, but that's it. What was the topic of the last conversation you had with your dad? I can't remember, but it was recent, because we all met at Ashley's house for Nicole's birthday celebration. How often did you visit your grandparents when you were growing up? Pretty much never, given they all lived no less than like, 10 hours (via car) from where we lived. My immediate family are the only people in NC. When two family members are fighting, what do you usually do? Stay out of it, but admittedly try to listen just to know what's going on. Do you like the smell of men’s cologne? Yeah. What’s your all time FAVORITE freezer food? Do you eat that a lot? I survive off of microwaveable freezer food, so this is very hard... uhhhhh... perhaps this Banquet bowl meal that's mac 'n cheese with spicy chicken. It's absolutely delicious, like you'd never guess that sucker was just popped in the microwave. I'd say I eat it a moderate amount; it's a reliable option if Mom's not cooking and I'm really hungry, because it's super filling. Do you like documentaries? Have you ever watched one and find it boring? I enjoy them, particularly when they're about animals. Were you ever a fan of macaroni & cheese? Do you like Kraft dinner? Ha, speak of mac 'n cheese. I love it, and Kraft makes it fine. Do you burn incense? Not as much as I used to. I love the smell and just general vibe, though. What would you consider an unacceptable first date? Going to a bar or something. Have you ever been so sick you had to be taken to the hospital? In the head, anyway. Is there anything currently bothering you? Multiple things. Would you say that you’ve got something ‘special’ about you? No. Do you like things vampire-related? I don't really have an opinion on vampire stuff. Are you the kind of person who does not like talking about their past? I don't care. Have you ever been to a casino? No. What’s the last thing you wore a costume for besides Halloween related events? Back when I still took dance classes and we had the yearly recital. What does your father do for a living? He's a mailman. What’s the last app you downloaded on your phone? Haha, I re-downloaded this ollllldddd game I had before, Nyan Cat: Lost in Space (or something like that?) for my niece to play. She's hooked on it now. Are you in any discomfort right now? Yeah; as I mentioned, my arm really hurts. What do you know the most about? Of all things I know, almost certainly meerkats. Are you seeing anyone? No. Have you ever hooked back up with an ex, just for sex? Was it a mistake or no? No. Have you ever gotten in trouble for using a phone in class? No, because I didn't use my phone in class. Have you seen all the Shrek movies? No, which is a fucking crime. I need to see the last one. Have you ever finished a whole video game? Plenty plenty plenty. Do you know anyone with a pet snake? Yeah, myself included. If you had to live in an extreme environment — think Sahara, Antarctica, under the sea, on the Moon— where would you want to live? Why? Probably Antarctica. I'm sure it would be unpleasant, being that cold, but I feel there's more you can do about being cold than being in the scalding heat of, say, the Sahara. Living on the moon or in the deep ocean sounds super sucky. How was your day overall? It's been okay. Not as bored as usual, at least. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? Like... zero. I want to say my dad, and I almost do, just... nightmares make that very, very difficult. Plus his past. What does your mom call you? Normally just "Britt." Write a sentence in another language: Oh god, my German is so rusty... uhhhh... Hallo, ich heiße Brittany, und ich bin 25 Jahre alt und wohne in North Carolina. I think I got the grammar right? Have you ever sent an X-Rated picture to someone? No. Even if I was comfortable with my body, I would be way too paranoid to at any point have a naked picture on my phone, even if I deleted it. Like, hello blackmail, but also, nothing you delete is ever really gone permanently. What big city do you live near? Raleigh is like an hour away. Do you like breaded chicken sandwiches? omg YES Is there a Sonic in your area? Yes, it's my favorite fast food joint. You have GOT to try the pretzel twists with cheese dip. Have you ever gone to a thrift store? Yeah, I love 'em. Do you think Johnny Depp is attractive? I do. Are you happy with the state you live in? No, not at all. I hate this place. Bunch of homophobic, racist rednecks. How many times have you seen the opposite sex naked? It's not like I counted every time I saw my ex naked over three and half years lmao. How many times have you seen the same sex naked? A few times. When days go by, do you cross them off on the calendar? I don't use a calendar. Are you currently counting down to something? If so, what? MY TATTOO APPOINTMENT!!!!! :''') I know I can't stop talking about it, but ugh I'm so excited. May 19th, c'mon already. Do you pay rent to your parents? No. Do you dye eggs for Easter? I used to as a kid. Not so much anymore. Are you in debt right now? For what? Oh god, I don't want to think of this. Would you ever work night crew? I really, really wouldn't want to. Humans are diurnal for a reason. Being awake in constant darkness would depress the fuck outta me, and it'd feel so lonely, with everyone I know asleep. Who was the last person that lied to you, or that you can recall lying to you? What did they lie about? How did you find out they were lying? I don't remember. Has anyone ever called you ugly, straight up, before? How did you react to this? No, not to my face. Who is the most stubborn person you know {excluding yourself}? MY MOTHER.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''helena'' by my chemical romance

[hermannsthumb]

Hiiii Maria! Seasonal Newmann u say? How about uhhhhh wine tasting + corn maze for them guys

HAPPY OCTOBER 1STTTTTTTT

Anonymous said: For the prompt meme,,, corn maze pls

from autumn fic meme here: 18. wine tasting + 27. (x2) corn maze

———————————-

It was a bad idea from the start and destined to fail, Newt will admit that. At the time, though (after a long day of ingesting as much sugar as possible at the fall fest, rounded out with a genuine wine-tasting in a big spookily-lit tent) it sounded great. And Hermann agreed it sounded great. They’re scientists, Newt said. They’re some of the greatest ones of the century, probably. How many scientists have hooked their brains up to an alien hivemind and lived to talk about it? Exactly two–and it’s them. He’s pretty sure they can solve a stupid corn maze. Even tipsy. Shit, they could probably finish it in five minutes.

Twenty minutes in, the wine has worn off, the temperature is dropping with the sun, and it’s becoming very clear Newt overestimated their abilities.

Hermann is not amused. “We’ve passed that scarecrow already,” he says. “I’m certain. We’re walking in circles.”

Newt gazes up at the one Hermann’s pointing to. It’s hokey and cliche, just like the rest of the maze (with its jack-o-lanterns and fake cobwebs everywhere): creepy sack head, plaid shirt, pitchfork strapped to a hand that sways in the wind. If they were in a horror movie, it’d probably come to life and chase them. It doesn’t. Newt can’t tell if he’s disappointed or not. “I think they just all look the same, dude,” Newt says. “Look–” he points to a corner. “That pumpkin looks new.”

“It looks like every other pumpkin we’ve seen today,” Hermann says, scowling at its jagged, flickering smile, “because it’s the same one.” To really hammer in his point, he repeats “We’re walking in circles.”

“Even if we are,” Newt says, “which we’re not, at least it’s giving us some quality time together, right?” Hermann turns his scowl on Newt. Newt, unphased, inches over and takes his free hand. “It’s just you, and me.” He strokes his thumb over the back of Hermann’s knuckles, through his stupid-cute red mittens. Hermann’s scowl begins to twitch into a smile. “And that evil scarecrow.”

Hermann snorts, and doesn’t pull his hand away, which Newt counts as a win. “It is unsettling,” he agrees, and makes a face at the scarecrow’s sack head. It flaps sadly back at him. “Come on. I don’t fancy being stuck in here after dark.”

“Wait a sec,” Newt says. He digs around in the deep pocket of his overalls before finally producing a small brown bag of candy corn. At Hermann’s inquisitive stare, he adds, “I know it’s gross, but I’m hungry.” He needs the sugar rush. Get his brain working. The wine made him sleepy.

“You ate four candy apples today,” Hermann says, but takes a handful himself. 

Twenty-five more minutes pass. The sun sets. Newt’s pretty sure at least five bats pass overhead. They finish off the candy corn. They make out against a few hay bales for a bit until Hermann complains that it’s irritating his skin. Eventually, they reach a small fork in the path, which Newt thinks is probably a good sign, because they haven’t seen one of those yet–only four-way splits. “Well, babe,” he says, “left or right?”

“Left,” Hermann says immediately.

“Oh,” Newt says. He scuffs his boot against the dirt ground. “Uh. I was actually kinda feeling right.”

“Hm,” Hermann says. His voice gets the way it always does when he’s preparing to condescend to Newt. He adjusts his glasses. “I see. Only, you know, Newton, we haven’t taken any left turns yet–”

“Haven’t we?” Newt says.

“We haven’t,” Hermann says. “I’ve been keeping track.” (Probably why they got lost in the first place.) “I think we ought to take a left.”

“There’s nothing down that way,” Newt says. “There are more pumpkins down the right way. Look.” A row of more flickering jack-o-lanterns down that path, lining the corn hedge, more cobwebs. The left side is dark.

“Obviously an attempt to fool people like you,” Hermann says, “who take directions from pumpkins.” He gives Newt’s hand a sharp tug. “Left, Newton.”

“No, you dick. I’m not–”

Something moves directly ahead of them in the corn. Newt freezes. 

Hermann does not freeze. “Oh, what is it now?” he sighs. Earlier, when they’d done the walk through of the “Haunted Manor” in the main part of the fair (an old farmhouse decorated with more hokey Halloween stuff, employees dressed as ghosts leaping out from corners, and a foggy backyard full of punny styrofoam gravestones), Newt kept grabbing his shoulder and hissing boo in his ear to make him jump, so Newt has a feeling he’s all spooked-out at this point. And all patienced-out. Unfortunately, it’s not Newt this time.

He shushes Hermann and draws him a little closer. “I think there’s someone over there,” he whispers.

“I’m not falling for that again,” Hermann snaps. “Don’t–” More rustling cornstalks, closer to them, this time. Hermann jumps; he clings to Newt’s arm. “What is it?” he hisses.

Newt’s imagination takes that chance to run wild: one of the scarecrows, magically brought to life with nightfall and stalking after them. A giant monster with a pumpkin head. The ghost of someone who got lost in here years ago (just like them) and starved to death and is going to take its revenge. Aliens. “I don’t know,” Newt hisses back. Heart pounding, and for lack of seeing any better weapon, he snatches a dried and hardened corn husk from the ground and wields it like a sword in front of them. He nudges Hermann behind him protectively. “Stay there.”

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Hermann says, but Newt does anyway.

“Hey, asshole, what do you want!” he calls at the corn.

The rustling stops. For a second, Newt hopes he’s scared whatever it is off (definitely aliens, they probably recognized Newt and Hermann from how they handled the kaiju and were too afraid to try anything), but then it picks up–faster–coming right towards them–and then something bursts out at them, blinding them with a bright beam of light.

Newt screams (but only a little). Hermann swears. They stagger backwards, clinging to each other, nearly falling on their asses.

And then the light is lowered. “What are you guys still doing in here?” their assailant says, who looks less like an assailant and more like one of the minimum-wage teenagers in orange vests and flannel who have been working stands at the festival all night. Newt lowers the hardened corn husk and blinks, dazedly, at her. She’s holding a flashlight. “The farm closed thirty minutes ago.”

“Why,” Newt squeaks. He clears his throat. “Why were you sneaking around in the corn? You scared the shit out of us.” (Hermann mumbles something along the lines of speak for yourself, but Newt can feel the bastard’s heart pounding away even through his fifty layers of turtlenecks.)

“Some kid lost a cell phone in here and my boss is making me look for it.” The girl rolls her eyes. “We are closed, though, so–”

“Of course,” Hermann says. He brushes dirt off his sweater and tries to play it cool. “Apologies. We were, ah, having some difficulty figuring a way out of the maze…”

“Oh,” the girl says. She shines the beam of her flashlight to their left. “Go that way, and then take another left, and you’ll be out. Happy Halloween.”

Newt and Hermann return the sentiment, and, both red-faced and more than a little mortified, quickly scurry away. They’re out of the maze in minutes.

“I told you it was left,” Hermann mutters.

Newt elbows him. “Shut up,” he says, fondly.

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag #holoxam

[pumpkinpaix]

(tw suicide, no need to read on if you would prefer not!) thank you for reblogging the list of hotlines! I don’t want to overstep here, and of course please do feel free to ignore this ask if you would rather not go into the topic, but my personal experience with hotlines in multiple countries have been less than ideal. One thing that normally go unadvertised in this posts is that the worker will most almost certainly call the police on the caller if they’re exhibiting significant distress (1/2)

(2/2, tw suicide cont) which can be the opposite of helpful for callers from marginalized communities. At a time when I had no access to health insurance, I have been threatened by a hotline counselor to head to an emergency room (which I cannot afford) or be arrested by police at my address. Hotlines most definitely can be valuable and helpful! But in case you or others were unaware of this potential outcome, I’d just like to spread this word as well as ask for your thoughts. Thanks again!

hey there anon! Sorry it’s taken me a few days to respond, but you know. Brains. /o\ you’re not overstepping at all!

I’m aware that hotlines are sometimes uhhhhh hit or miss, shall we say? I’ve heard a LOT of mixed experiences from people who’ve used them, and sometimes it’s really good! and sometimes it’s..... like really bad and can lead to situations like the one you described. I personally have never used one because it hasn’t been something that I think I would find helpful, so I cannot speak from my own experience unfortunately.

I agree that it’s good for people to know that hotlines may not be the right choice for them (*I’m hesitant about the note that workers will “almost certainly” call the police in certain situations--not that I’m trying to invalidate your experiences or knowledge! I just don’t have sources other than you at the moment and I prefer to have more verification for something as important as this orz but I also don’t want to scare people away who might get some good out of the hotlines, you know?

I’m kind of back and forth on the hotlines thing a lot of the time because of the exact phenomenon that you’ve described ahaha, but when I reblog those posts I think, well--knowing that it’s an option might still be good? Or at least, having an actionable thing to do when you’re in a bad space might be an effective way to snap you out of it. I err on the side of reblogging just in case a lot of the time, but you’re right--sometimes, it isn’t a good experience.

I sometimes think about making some kind of post in the same vein, as in, “if you’re looking for a sign to stay alive today, this is it” with a series of actionable items that are not just “call a hotline immediately”, such as: reach out to your support network of family and friends (if that’s an option), find something to do with your hands that isn’t dangerous and see if you can wait out the urges (fidget toys, some kind of basic craft, a mobile game), take care of basic needs (go to the bathroom, drink some water, eat a low effort snack), go through a series of thought/breathing exercises etc. but I hesitate because I’ve only ever had suicidal ideation, never any active suicidal urges and I’m unsure if these sorts of things would help at all. (these obviously aren’t long-term solutions, just based on coping mechanisms I’ve used to try and get through bad self-states) I’m certainly friends with people who HAVE been (or currently are oof) actively suicidal, but the most helpful thing I’ve found has just been to physically go to them, stay calm, and like, idk, take them out to do an activity, like get food, grocery shopping, drive around and talk etc. which.... isn’t like an actionable item on the part of the suicidal party. orz

i don’t have an answer, as you might have expected! my thoughts really boil down to mostly, this is an imperfect course of action, but it’s what we have in terms of infrastructure. If one has a support network of friends and family, I would definitely reach out to them first if possible, but as I said, I know that’s also not always an option. idk anon! the point is: thank you for sharing this and for thinking that my thoughts on the topic would be worthwhile.

#i don't really want this in main tags ahaha #/ #// #/// #//// #suicide prevention #suicide #suicide hotlines #i am not an expert nor have i done a lot of research im so sorry!! #gonna post this before i have an ocd quandary about it #thank you very much anon! #i am sorry that you have had to experience that #and i hope you are in a better space these days <3 <3 #Anonymous #asks and replies

[astriline]

1, 4, 6, 10, 11, 12, 15

1. what’s the last thing you did that made you feel proud of yourself?

i mean recently my art has been improving a lot so every time i finish a particularly hard piece i get really happy, and im always trying to improve so like im in a constant stream of “haha nice hannah u did good here”

4. a thing you accomplished today? 

uhhhhh well im kinda sick rn, but i did finish reading a book which is impressive for me seeing as how before just a few weeks ago i hadnt touched a book in two years. since those few weeks i have finished 5 books and i am currently reading a 6th so idk thats just really cool i think

6. favorite way of dancing? 

i am very bad at dancing but i will whip sometimes just to make the people around me upset

10. if you could grant one wish to another person, what would it be?

this is such a weird question, i have no idea what kind of answer to give! i guess i would more or less grant any wish to like a really good friend, but in general i really have no idea what kind of wish i would grant a person. 

11. one thing you like about your physical appearance? 

uhhhhhh i have nice eyes? and also my figure is looking really good recently so thats cool

12. one personal trait you like having? 

im a lesbian which is absolutely the best thing about me 

15. what’s a song you need people to hear at least once? 

i think that everyone should listen to at least one hatsune miku song i just think shes neat and a trans gay icon

#thanks 4 the ask! #hotcheese #here's the mail it never fails