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joonberriess · 2 months

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⋆ TAGS — really soft and domestic, TW: this deals with postpartum depression, baby daddy!jk, soft lil kisses, insecure!oc, angsty as hell, this is more of a comfort fic, mentioned baby, oc rlly struggles but jk is super supportive, mentioned past pregnancy, this made me cry, soft hours, jk pampers his lovely gf, CANON AUUUU JK’S JUST JK HERE LMAO

⋆ WORD COUNT — 2.4 k

“vámonos a comer un heladito, tu princesita, cómprame cositas. en mis tacones casi todo el día, dame un foot-rub and ice out mi tobillo,”

Your eyes fluttered under the feeling of lips sliding across your forehead, eyelid, and nose. You hear Jungkook laughing quietly as he envelops you in his strong arms and tugs you close. His murmurs and pestering have you pulling a face in your sleep, nose scrunched cutely given the way he coos teasingly.

“What time is it?” You mumble softly and blankly stare back at him, eyes heavy from sleep.

“Noon.” This has you going stiff, “Relax baby, he’s okay your mom came early to pick him up.” He comfortingly strokes over your side and backside.

You sink back into the sheets and nod, “Why didn’t you wake me?” You mumble under your breath as your eyes flutter shut.

Jungkook pressed more gentle kisses to your forehead with a low rumble, “You need a break, figured maybe we could go out–do some shopping, go to that sushi place you’ve been dying to try.. That sounds good, yeah?” He murmurs.

You hum, “It does, feels like I haven’t been out in forever.”

He waits with a bated breath and smiles softly when you open your eyes and stare back with more clarity, all traces of sleep etched away. “You’re so pretty, y’know that?” He brushes a strand of hair out of your face.

A subtle heat rises in your cheeks as you smile back, “Even with baby barf and spit all over my shirt?”

“The prettiest.” He leans over to kiss your nose, looking into your eyes with a twinkle in his own. He looks at you like you’ve just hung the stars for him.

Shyly, you press a soft smooch to his lips before flopping flat on your back with a sigh, “The fridge’s nearly empty isn’t it?” You mumble, “I’m sorry, I meant to go the other day but I ended up—”

“You’re fine, it’s okay. You know I’m here too right?” Jungkook reaches over to hold your hand, “Don’t worry about it baby, you’ve got your hands full right now and I get it. ‘s okay to ask for help too.”

You look at him with a soft smile, “I love you.” You lay a quick kiss on his cheek and roll out of bed to head to the bathroom.

Jungkook huffs, “Only one? On the cheek too..” He grumbles like a petulant child, sitting up in the messy sheets tangled around his hips and his bare chest out for your viewing.

“Get ready, it was YOUR idea to go out too so don’t make us late.” You fondly roll your eyes, you can hear him whine about something else behind you as the door shuts.

“…..” You pass in front of the body length mirror, pausing for a moment to observe your appearance. Your hands come up to rest over your tummy as you stare long and hard. “…”

You better get ready.

“y/n.”

“y/n?”

You snap out of your daydream and look over at Jungkook curiously, “Yeah?”

“I asked if you wanted to check out the fruits, it’s strawberry season and I’m sure they brought out all the fresh stuff.” Jungkook doesn’t seem at all bothered by the fact that you’ve spaced out for a second time since entering the store.

You shake your head, “I don’t like strawberries.” You say disinterestedly.

‘But you ate them your whole pregnancy, what’s wrong now?’ Your brain is screaming at you to just say yes and deal with it but you can’t.

He gives a soft hum, “That’s fine. Is there anything you wanted to get?” He steers the shopping cart away from the fruits, leading you down an aisle filled with spices and other cooking ingredients.

“Um, what was that thing you bought last time? When you made that white stew.” You scrunch your nose, “Ugh I forgot.”

“Ohh, you mean the cream stew mix? Uhh I think it’s down this aisle lemme check.” Jungkook leaves the cart with you as he trails down the aisle looking up, down, and around.

You pick out a few things to try out later on and happily make your way over. “Did you find it?” You curiously peek over his shoulder, damn near yelling because he shoots back up with a ‘ah-ha!’.

“What?” He innocently says after noticing the scowl on your face.

“You scared me.” You huff and punch his arm gently, “C’mon, I wanna get some chips and the aisle is back that way.” Jungkook happily trails after you, telling you all about his upcoming Calvin Klein campaign.

“Look,” Jungkook snorts as he holds up a pair of lace g-strings, “you mean to tell me this tiny triangle covers your entire pus–”

“Jungkook!” You hiss quietly after noticing a few older women turn their heads, “Put those down.” You snatch the panties away and toss them back into their respective drawers.

He cheekily grins and picks up another pair of underwear, “What? I didn’t do anything, I was just asking.” He chuckles.

“You are so dumb.” You giggle quietly, “Stop!! You’re going to get us kicked out, I thought I had one baby not two.”

“But babyy this is so boring, jus’ a bunch of girlie stuff and these women keep lookin’ at me like I’m a creep but I swear I’m just trying to help you.” He pouts.

You shake your head fondly, “Here, go find something to buy or do while I finish up here.” His eyes light up and he presses a messy smooch to your cheek before practically sprinting out.

Your eyes slowly turn over to the mannequin sitting tall on the platform donned in a new lingerie set. You stare at it for what seems like eternity while the world goes on about their day around you. Eventually a staff comes to break you out of your bubble.

“Is everything okay miss? Were you interested in our new spring collection?”

“Oh, um yeah, well I’m trying to surprise my boyfriend you know? I don’t know if he’ll like it ‘n stuff.” You murmur softly, eyes lowered and averted from the mannequin.

“Mmm.. what do you like?”

“Silk, maybe a babydoll or teddy..? I think.” You can’t stomach the idea of wearing a two piece, because then that means your….

“We have just the set then, we got a ton of new items for this spring. ” She grins while leading you away.

When you come out of the store, Jungkook’s barely walking back. He has this goofy little smile on his face as he stops in front of you, barely containing his excitement. “Guess what.”

“What did you do?” You giggle softly and eye the bag in his hand.

“I got this for you.” He brings out a large shirt and holds it up proudly, “It says: Best Milf Ever.”

You stare at the words with disbelief and then you’re breaking out into uncontrollable laughter. People around you look in curiosity but you can’t stop, you feel like you’re about to pee from how hard you’re laughing.

And Jungkook?

He stands there with a fond smile, gazing at you lovingly as he puts the shirt back, “You like it?”

You haven’t laughed nor felt this much joy in a while. “I love it.”

After having dinner Jungkook takes you out for ice cream. You were a bit burnt out from being out all day so you waited in the car while he went inside to buy the ice cream.

You think back to everything that happened today, it feels nice. You make a mental note to ask Jungkook to take you to a cat cafe sometime later on in the week. “Oh my god.” You mutter in embarrassment.

Jungkook’s walking back with a monstrosity of a ice cream sundae and then your perfectly NORMAL scoop of sherbet with gummies on top. “Jungkook what is all that mess?” You whine.

“What? I wanted triple chocolate with sprinkles and fudge.” He slips into the car and hands the small bowls over, “C’mon you gotta try it.”

“Hell no! This looks like it can either send me to do number three or I’m gonna puke my guts out.” You hiss.

“Number three doesn’t exist, nice try.” Jungkook scoffs softly while pulling out of the parking lot.

“It does now.” You mumble, ignoring his loud laughter.

You can’t hide the face you make while Jungkook eats that horrendous dessert. He doesn’t even care that you’re judging him as he happily watches his little Netflix show he’s been yapping about as of lately.

“I knew it, it was her all along..” He mutters to himself as he eats a large spoonful of ice cream.

“I’m going to the kitchen, you want anything?” You can’t take it anymore as you stand abruptly and pass by.

“No.”

You put your ice cream away and drink a glass of water in the kitchen. You enjoy the peace and quiet, it’s been a cool minute since you’ve had some time to yourself. Between caring for a newborn and balancing your everyday life, shit’s been hard.

Not that Jungkook doesn’t help, but sometimes you feel like you put too much on him. He says he doesn’t care but.. you do.

With a heavy sigh you leave the cup in the sink and trail over to your bedroom. The dainty lingerie bag sits on the corner of the bed, you have yet to try it on but you don’t know..

“Fuck it.” You mutter while stripping down and slipping on the pretty babydoll top and matching thong to go with it.

The soft pink and silky smooth feeling of it has you smiling to yourself over how pretty it is on you. The set even came with a robe so you slipped that on too and tied it securely around your waist before heading back out to show your lover.

“Jungkook.” You call out, “What do you think?”

He pauses his show and looks over, his eyes visibly glaze over as he takes you in from head to toe. “Pretty, I like it—pink suits you.” He beckons you over.

Right, he thinks it’s just a robe.

You walk over with a soft hum and stand between his legs, “I got something else, it’s under.”

His eyes darken and he licks his lips, “Can I?” His hands hover over the sash. You can’t help but shiver with the way he looks at you like he wants to eat you alive. Makes you feel hot.

“Yeah..” Your voice comes out breathier than usual, a hint of excitement underlying your tone.

Jungkook unties the knot and slowly pulls your robe off. “Fuck.” He whispers when he sees the pretty babydoll underneath, he gets a peek at your thong too and he’s nearly drooling.

“Shit baby you look so fuckin’ pretty, look at you,” he gently twirls you around with a low whistle.

His hand hovers over your ass, not quite touching but there. You gently pull his hands closer with a soft, “You can touch.” You murmur.

Jungkook audibly gulps and grabs a fistful of your babydoll, he lifts it up enough to slip his hands around both cheeks. He gives both doughy cheeks a tight squeeze before he’s jiggling it in the palms of his hands.

“Can I baby?” He asks softly, “I wanna take you to bed.” To that you nod.

Before you can get another word out, he abruptly stands and hauls you up into his strong arms. You squeal in shock and hit his shoulders, “Jungkook..! Put me down!” You whine.

“No.” Jungkook smirks as he lands a sharp smack to your ass, “Let me take care of you yeah? Just sit ‘n look pretty for me.” He carries you down the hall and kicks the door open, gently tossing you onto the center of the bed.

You bounce back on the mattress with a soft ‘oof’, he doesn’t let up because he’s already crawling over you and landing a sweet yet heated kiss on your lips. You wrap your arms around him and hug him close, enjoying the soft touches.

Jungkook takes his sweet time kissing you, the kiss is slow and his touches are light and feathery. He holds you like you’re made of glass or something, gently cupping your hips and massaging them. It tugs on your poor heart strings and you find yourself tearing up for no reason..?

He pulls away with a soft pant, pressing his forehead to your own as he stares into your eyes with devotion. “Why are you crying baby? Hm? Why’s my pretty girl sad?” He wipes your tears with his thumbs.

“B-Because, you’re so good to me.” You softly hiccup, “Feel safe with you.”

He brushes your hair out of your face and smooches your nose, “Yeah, what else baby. Talk to me.” He murmurs patiently while cupping the side of your cheek.

“You don’t make me feel alone.” You whisper, and his heart breaks seeing you this vulnerable, “I-I know I haven’t been there for you b-but with the baby and–”

“And who said you needed to take care of me? You already have enough with the baby, you spent nine months carrying our baby and you worked hard to bring him into the world my love. Makes me proud of you baby, strongest girl I know.” He softly smiles.

Your heart races and you feel a knot in your throat as you continue listening to him, “You’re going to be okay—we’re okay. You know I’m always going to be right here for whatever you need, you’re doing so good my love.”

You let out a soft sob and bury your face in his shoulder. These past two months of silently struggling with coming to terms of your newfound motherhood and changes with your relationship finally come to a stop. You feel good knowing that Jungkook is so understanding and supportive.

For a while you thought you were going insane, that it was your fault and you were a horrible mother for feeling so…bad.

Even when you were bedridden for days, void of any life and emotion, Jungkook is still here.

“I love you.” Jungkook whispers.

“I love you too.” You sniffle.

Jungkook helps you slip into one of his shirts as the two of you cuddle for the rest of the night watching silly rom-coms. You know the future will be okay.

Everything is okay.

TAGLIST: @fragmentof-indifference @jungkooksseuphoria @kooliv @angelarin @jjeonjjk7 @lilliankoo @pb-n-juju @ellesalazar @saweetspoiled @laylasbunbunny @prettyprincejk @cherrysainttt @hyunjinswifeee @joongraduatewithonor @hellbornsworld @leire-mia @m1sss1mp @lissful @winkii @lifeless-firefly @exactlygreatcoffee @taestoess @ayalies @floweryjeons @softtcurse @lilspinachwrld @tearyjjeon @littleobsessedkitty @lovelovelovebts @angeljmnie @rerefundslocals @bangtans-mama @thvhoe @maddkitt @tvse @ohjeon @teteswtnr @jkslovey12 @kelsyx33 @milfpo1ice @sluttydidi @ztyur @beomgyuult @shescharlie @sweet-sourhotcoco @lalita-7 @hazzzelsdimension @p34rluv @kook-net @bonita0-0 @vmapy @dahliadaenerys @frieschan @lilyflowerguk @sayokodiary @babycandy111 @looneybleus @ash07128 @gyukookswhore @rrosiitas

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cherienymphe · 4 months

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Teenage Dirtbag X

JJ Maybank x Reader x Rafe Cameron

Warnings: mentions of NON-CON, DUB-CON acts, abusive relationship, domestic violence, violence (+ gun violence), gun kink, dacryphilia, attempted murder, mentions of blood, public sex, jealousy, manipulation, infidelity, underage drinking, drug use, canon ages, kook!reader

➥ banner by @vase-of-lilies | ➥ divider by @firefly-graphics

➥ series masterlist

summary: You’re charmingly spoiled. You’re too kind for your own good. You’re the princess of Figure 8 …and you’re way out of JJ Maybank’s league, but when he realizes that Rafe Cameron’s pride and joy is actually a bruised and battered damsel, he’s determined to save you.

Your rescue just comes with a price.

⭑

You blinked at JJ’s question, leaning back against the wall of the pool house.

He sat next to you, both of you facing the couch, and you tried to ignore the feel of his arm brushing against yours. Despite the fact that it was only a week ago that he was kissing you in your bedroom—and that Rafe didn’t not deserve it—you still felt wrong about the whole thing. Horrible or not, the older blond was still your boyfriend, and it was bad enough that you were hiding out in the pool house with JJ while Rafe was probably off snorting coke with his friends.

You didn’t want to make it worse by doing anything other than talking.

The blonde’s question made you eventually sigh, straightening.

“Hey…hey, you don’t have to answer anything you don’t-.”

“No…I…” you shook your head. “It’s fine.”

That was the truth.

“It’s just that I’ve never talked about any of this with anyone before…”

Your voice shrank, and you didn’t want to admit how comforting it felt to feel JJ’s hands come up to rest on your arms. It was strange to say all of this out loud to anyone, especially JJ, because you were so used to Rafe’s behavior—had been rationalizing it for so long—and you felt nervous as to how JJ would take it.

“It was my 19th birthday,” you slowly said.

You felt JJ tense, and when you snuck a glance at him, there was a deep frown on his face as he looked at you.

“We were arguing…” you sadly smiled as you thought about what it’d been about. “…because I wouldn’t have sex with him.”

You scoffed at the memory and at how you’d ignored what you thought was a little thing.

“It’d been a sore spot for a while. I was a virgin, I wasn’t ready, and Rafe was waiting longer than he’d anticipated.”

JJ’s hands fell, and he fully turned to face you, that frown remaining on his face as he listened.

“It became this whole…thing that really just pissed me off because it was my birthday,” you spat out, frowning now too. “It was my birthday party, and he was ruining it.”

You swallowed, recalling how angry and sad you’d felt that night.

“You know, I was reading up on this one day, and it said that sometimes people like him will purposely start arguments and fights on special days and holidays and stuff to make it all about them?” you chuckled to yourself, shaking your head. “They were right.”

Tears kissed your eyes, and JJ reached out to brush his thumbs underneath them.

“…because every time I think about that day, instead of remembering turning nineteen and celebrating with my family and my friends and my boyfriend… All I remember is him slapping me,” you whispered, holding JJ’s gaze. “All I remember is where it all started and how he begged me to forgive him…and how I should’ve left then.”

“Hey…”

“It was my birthday…but to me it’s just the beginning of the end. It’s the start of when Rafe ruined my life.”

JJ wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer, and you pressed your face into his shoulder. You felt so odd—so much lighter—and you didn’t need to be a therapist to know that it was because you were finally talking about this. The blonde’s hands rubbing up and down your back was enough to make your lashes flutter.

“You know, I blamed myself for the longest time,” you mumbled.

JJ pulled away almost immediately, lips parting, and you shook your head.

“I know that it’s not my fault. I know that, now, but… I was so angry that night that I said things that I knew would make him mad,” you shrugged. “It just didn’t seem fair that I was the only one upset on my birthday.”

“That doesn’t excuse him hitting you,” JJ bit out, and you nodded with a shrug.

“It doesn’t…but…for a while I kind of believed I’d brought that on myself.”

JJ looked like he didn’t know how to take in what you’d told him, pink lips pressed together as he just studied your face. The bruising under your eye was practically nonexistent, and you shuddered when he reached up to lightly graze the skin with his fingers. You’d been exceptionally agreeable since the incident, dreading a repeat of the night where Rafe forced himself on you so violently that you’d had to strip the sheets.

JJ suddenly blinked, brows twitching, and there was an unsure look on his face.

“Can I ask you something?” he wondered, voice low, and you nodded.

A look passed over his face that you couldn’t place, and he seemed to be thinking hard about whatever was on his mind.

“A little over a year ago…”

You felt your shoulders droop, almost positive you knew where he was going with this.

“Sarah told us how you and Rafe had called the police one day.”

You sighed, recalling the story Ward had repeated. Neighbors were bound to notice a police car in the yard, bound to spread gossip, and he couldn’t very well tell people the truth.

“She didn’t know what for. Said that Ward wouldn’t tell her…”

JJ’s words died in the air as you stood, his hands falling from you. You tried not to think about that day if you could help it, and you were surprised by the quick procession of tears. JJ stood with you while you wiped your face, and you knew what he was going to ask before he even opened his mouth.

“Did you call the cops? On him?”

By his tone, you could tell that he knew the answer, and when you sniffed, JJ was there. He turned you around and pulled you against him. The reminder of that day—and all the emotions that weighed you down that evening—had more tears escaping against your will. You twisted your fingers into the back of his shirt, trembling in his hold, and JJ held you tighter.

“I thought I was going to die,” you shakily confessed. “I thought he was going to kill me.”

You could feel a shiver crawl down his spine at that.

“He was so mad,” you cried. “He was screaming and throwing glass at me and…he put a gun in my mouth.”

Your face was pressed into the crook of JJ’s neck.

“I didn’t know what else to do. I really thought…” you trailed off, squeezing your eyes shut. “It’s why I didn’t even want to talk to you. I didn’t want to go through that again for something as stupid as a smile.”

JJ seemed to freeze at that, and when he pulled away a bit, his gaze was questioning.

“What…?”

You opened and closed your mouth while JJ just stared at you, blue eyes glinting as his mind started to put the pieces together.

“What do you mean? Are you saying…?”

“No! JJ, that wasn’t your fault, it was mine.”

“Stop saying that,” he breathed. “What the hell do you mean? Are you saying Rafe did that because…?”

You rubbed your forehead, sighing.

“JJ, it wasn’t your fault. I’m the one who smiled back at you that day at The Wreck. Rafe saw.”

You swore you saw the color drain from his face, and you watched JJ stumble back, falling to sit on the edge of the couch. He was staring up at you with parted lips, and you didn’t need to be a mind reader to know that he was going over that interaction in his mind. It was such a simple and harmless interaction…one that had an almost fatal consequence.

JJ ran his hands down his face.

“…and when I told Rafe that you’d apologized to me?”

His voice was low—troubled—and when he lifted his gaze to meet yours, you only pulled your lip between your teeth. When you didn’t respond right away, you watched him exhale, shoulders sagging as he buried his face into his hands.

“JJ, that wasn’t your fault.”

I’m an idiot,” he choked out.

“JJ…” you whispered. “You couldn’t have known.”

“That doesn’t matter!”

He was standing, now, and you hated the conflict and regret you saw in his eyes.

“I knew he treated you like shit,” he spat, gesturing towards the door. “I knew it would piss him off.”

“JJ,” you reached for him.

“I just thought you guys would argue a little,” he whispered, and you rested your hand on his arm. “I didn’t know that he was…”

You held his gaze—yours pleading—as you tried to get him to see that it wasn’t his fault. You needed JJ to understand that there was no way he could’ve known. Sarah lived under the same roof as Rafe—and you half the time—and she still didn’t know. You weren’t going to fault JJ for thinking Rafe was only capable of being a little bit of an asshole.

When JJ’s hand rested on your cheek, your heart skipped a beat.

He was getting closer, and you should’ve been stopping him. The truth was that you felt safe with JJ, and you didn’t want to. The beginning of your relationship with Rafe felt like ages ago, so this safe—and excited feeling—you were experiencing with JJ felt almost new. When his nose touched yours, you placed your hand on his chest.

“I never would’ve done that if I had known…”

“I know you wouldn’t,” you reassured him, swallowing when his other hand touched your waist, fingers grazing the skin from where your shirt rode up. “It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay,” JJ argued. “You were right that day. I was being an asshole.”

When his lips brushed yours, you shook your head.

“JJ-.”

The rest of your words were swallowed when his lips covered yours, following you every time you tried to step back. It had been a week since he kissed you last, and the way he moved his mouth over yours told you that he would do it every day if he could. His hands were all over you, and you gasped into his mouth when they rested on the small of your back, pinning your lower half against him.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled against your lips. “I’m really fucking sorry.”

When your back met the wall, JJ wasted no time in pressing his knee between your legs, and you couldn’t hold in the shudder as he pressed his leg against your clothed mound. Things felt like they were moving too fast, so much so that you didn’t even realize what was happening until you moaned, JJ forcing you to grind yourself against his leg.

His hands were tight on your waist, and his lips had just traveled to your neck when your phone rang.

It startled you and angered JJ, the blond letting out a frustrated huff. It was Rafe—you knew it was Rafe—the other blond calling you almost every hour from the moment he’d left. JJ’s hands briefly squeezed your waist before forcing himself to pull away. His blue eyes glinted, and when you studied his face, he only shook his head.

Reluctantly, he let you go.

“Hey,” you softly said the moment you answered the phone.

You avoided JJ’s gaze as Rafe’s voice filled your ear.

“You know what? I actually think I’m gonna just head home.”

JJ’s voice reached you from the kitchen, and you only briefly glanced up as Pope responded.

“Seriously man? Now, you don’t even want to go out anymore? You made such a fuss!”

“Yeah, I know,” the blond said, and you heard Sarah say something—probably to John B. “…but I’m not feeling too good, and I think I’m just going to go home.”

Pope sounded disappointed—as did John B. —but they didn’t argue with him much over it. You were currently in the Cameron’s kitchen getting something to eat, and you had been since Sarah, her boyfriend, Pope, and JJ came inside under the reasoning that Pope had to pee.

“We’re just going to hang out with some people at the beach,” she’d said.

You could see it in her eyes then that she’d wanted to ask you to join them, but even if you hadn’t given her a look warning her off of that, Rafe’s tight grip on you was clear. If Sarah thought he was strict before, then it was nothing in comparison to how he was now after the incident at The Chateau. His phone call only moments ago was proof of it.

“How are you going to get back?” Sarah wondered, her voice pulling you from your thoughts.

“You know I’ll find a way,” JJ told her, tone light and boastful.

She made an unsure sound before letting it go.

“Well, leave before Rafe gets back. I don’t want a phone call from Rose or Y/N telling me that my brother and my friend got into a fight.”

You closed the fridge as the rest of them filed out, telling JJ to call them when he made it back to The Cut. The house was oddly quiet, and while you wanted to pretend like you weren’t alone in the house with JJ—Rose didn’t count—it was kind of hard to do when you turned around to find him at the kitchen entrance.

He was wearing some shirt with the sleeves cut off—as he often did—and you tried not to let your gaze linger on his arms.

“I hope you didn’t do that for me…”

The smirk that danced along his lips gave you your answer.

“Maybe,” he shrugged, stepping into the kitchen. “I was kind of hoping Rafe wouldn’t be here.”

“…and he could walk in at any moment…as is his right. Considering,” you gestured around. “…this is his house.”

JJ leaned his arms on the other side of the counter, gazing up at you as you grabbed a paper towel.

“Hey, I’m sure I could find some excuse if he catches me in here…”

He straightened, slowly making his way around the island, and you didn’t miss that mischievous glint in his blue eyes.

“If he manages to find me on top of you…maybe I could even tell him I forced you into it.”

“JJ…” you said, taking a step back.

He held your gaze for a few moments before looking away with a shake of his head.

“Why do you feel bad about what you’re doing? He treats you like shit,” he chuckled, but it lacked humor.

You looked away from him, shrugging.

“I’m not doing anything,” you whispered.

He didn’t respond right away, and you didn’t hear him move closer, so you shuddered when you felt his fingers grazing the side of your face.

“You shouldn’t feel bad about kissing me,” he quietly told you. “If you ask me, you should be doing a lot worse.”

When you looked at him again, he was much closer than you’d anticipated, and you sharply inhaled. Despite his cheeky nature, you could see the way his eyes dimmed as he looked at you.

“Every time I think about him…and you…I think I could kill him.”

You frowned at his confession, shaking your head.

“JJ…”

“I would if you asked me to,” he continued, moving closer. “I’d drown him in the fucking ocean.”

“You can’t-! You can’t say things like that,” you said, voice lowering.

“Why not?” he curiously wondered. “You’re telling me you don’t want him dead for everything he’s put you through? There was blood on your sheets last week-.”

“I know,” you cut him off. “I was there, remember?”

You watched JJ take a deep breath, and he seemed to be calming himself down. The silence was a little tense, and you worriedly eyed the entrance, expecting Rafe to just show up at any moment. When JJ took your hand, you tried to pull it away, but he wouldn’t let you. You found yourself between him and the counter, and your heart was in your throat.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I just…don’t understand why you’re fighting me.”

Your eyes burned, and you briefly looked towards the ceiling.

“…because,” you breathed. “He’s still my boyfriend.”

“The only reason you’re with him is because you don’t want him to fucking murder you,” JJ sneered. “That’s not a relationship, that’s a hostage situation.”

You couldn’t disagree with JJ’s assessment, and you both knew it.

“He enjoys treating you like shit…so why can’t you bring yourself to enjoy treating him like shit?”

Again, JJ’s logic wasn’t wrong, and you briefly closed your eyes with a sigh.

“…because if he caught me, he’d kill me,” you whispered.

When JJ’s hand touched your face again, you held his gaze. The smile he gave you was small, and your heart fluttered when he brushed his thumb over your skin.

“What did I say earlier?” he mockingly replied. “Let him try to kill me for fucking his girlfriend, I don’t care.”

He pressed his lips to yours.

“I just want you to stop feeling guilty over that asshole because he doesn’t deserve it.”

You chewed on your lip as he ran his eyes over your face, and when he was about to kiss you again, you shook your head.

“You should go. Sarah was right, Rafe could be back at any moment, and… That’s not a fight I think I’ll ever be ready for,” you sighed, moving from between him and the counter.

JJ seemed reluctant, but he eventually obliged, grazing his hand along your waist on the way out.

Rafe’s light snores grew quieter the moment you closed the door behind you.

He’d come to your house drunk and stumbling, too wasted to even fuck you—although it wasn’t for lack of trying. Naturally, he wouldn’t hear a word you said about drunk driving, waving you off and laughing in your face. After his second failed attempt to stay awake, he merely rolled off of you, his even breathing reaching your ears only moments later.

You’d pulled your knees up to your chest, eyeing him for the longest time and mulling over your conversation with JJ. You knew that the other blond wasn’t wrong. Rafe had done—and would do—much worse to you. Your relationship wasn’t a relationship, at all, but instead a prison, and maybe you shouldn’t feel guilty for finding some semblance of happiness. No matter where it came from.

Once alcohol knocked Rafe out, he was pretty much dead to the world for hours.

…and that was how you found yourself putting on shoes while he slept. You might’ve been more nervous and scared if you weren’t so in tune with Rafe’s patterns. There was no doubt in your mind that he wouldn’t wake up until at least noon the following day, but you still kept your steps light as you made your way down the stairs. You couldn’t stop your heart from racing, and your fingers shook while you disabled the alarm.

The walk across the lawn felt too long, and if you hadn’t already psyched yourself up, you might’ve turned around and went back inside the house. Out of paranoia, you looked over your shoulder, relieved to see that your room was still dark with no sign of movement in the window. JJ didn’t open the door right away when you knocked.

However, once fatigue faded a bit, and he realized that it was indeed you through the cracked door, he was swinging it open and pulling you inside.

“I just…wanted to sleep here for a few hours I guess,” you murmured, still feeling unsure.

JJ shifted on his feet, and you only then noticed his bare chest. The plaid pants he wore hung low on his hips, and you told yourself you weren’t here for anything like that.

“…and Rafe…?”

“So drunk that not even an earthquake could wake him,” you said with a shrug.

JJ pulled his lip between his teeth, eyeing you with a look that was hard to name. He didn’t respond right away, just staring at you and studying you. His light hair was going every which way, some hanging into his face, and one hand ran through it when the other eventually reached for you.

“I’m glad you came,” he whispered, pulling you to him.

The pool house wasn’t as big as others you’d seen—namely some of your former friends—but it was spacious enough for both a living room and a decent sized bedroom. JJ’s hand was tight on yours as he pulled you through the threshold, and you glanced around, recalling that you hadn’t been inside the bedroom since high school. The bedding was askew, obviously lived in, and you were glad your parents barely paid the building any mind outside of the yearly spring cleaning.

“Do you like staying here?” you asked him, sitting on the edge of the bed.

JJ found that funny.

“If you’d ever seen my place, you’d know how crazy that question is,” he told you, plopping down beside you. “I love staying here.”

His face was close to yours.

“…and not just because of the 100 thread count sheets or whatever.”

He shrugged at you, eyebrows waggling, and you fought back a smile.

“I guess I’ll have to see your place to give me some perspective then.”

His own smile twitched, and you didn’t like the way his face fell a bit.

“Nah,” he breathed. “That’s…not something I want you to see.”

You felt your own face fall.

“…I mean, I know things with your father are pretty…ugly, but it’s where you grew up, isn’t it?”

Your tone was a little hopeful, and you watched JJ watch you. His blue eyes shined in the darkness, and you didn’t miss the way his smile grew again. When he reached for your face, he let out a light laugh.

“Yeah…yeah it is where I grew up,” he confirmed. “I guess you’re right about that.”

He pulled you with him as he laid down, and you faced him on your side.

“We’ll have to find some way to get you back to The Cut then,” he whispered.

At the reminder of your last visit, you both grew quiet. You were sure you both were remembering that morning when Rafe came to pick you up, and you recalled your next reunion with JJ, feeling comforted that he was so worried about you the entire time. As if thinking of the exact same thing, he touched the skin under your eye, and before you could say anything, JJ leaned in to touch it with his lips.

“I really hate that you’re with him,” he said after a while, pulling away. “He doesn’t deserve you.”

You took a deep breath at that, reaching out and touching his arm, thoughtful.

“…and you do…?”

When you lifted your gaze, your eyes met his again.

“I like to think that I do,” he murmured, fingers dancing towards your chin.

JJ pulled you into a kiss, and despite the fact that this wasn’t what you snuck out of the house for, you couldn’t ignore the way your stomach flipped. In this moment, JJ felt like your boyfriend—lying in bed with you and talking to you and kissing you. It was the most relaxed you’d felt in bed for a long time, and you knew it was a feeling you could get used to…and have trouble going without.

“What are we doing?” you found yourself whispering in the darkness.

You looked between his eyes as you asked this.

“Rafe’s…asleep in my bedroom…and I…” you scoffed. “I’m here with you.”

“It’s sexy, isn’t it…”

“JJ,” you sighed. “I’m serious. Like…what are we doing?”

You were sure that your worry was all over your face.

“We don’t have to have an answer for that, right now,” was his response, hand touching your waist. “I just want to help you forget about Rafe, sometimes.”

He kissed you again.

“I want you to be with someone you don’t have to be afraid of,” he murmured against your lips. “Someone you can relax with.”

He pulled you closer, rolling you both, and when he rested on top of you, you pressed your hands to his arms.

“JJ, I don’t… I’m not comfortable with anything like that yet.”

Your lips brushed his as you spoke, and you swallowed.

“Kissing you and sneaking around to talk to you is one thing, but…”

You didn’t know why, but going beyond that in any way would make what you were doing seem too real—too deceptive. JJ didn’t seem to care about that though, pressing his lips to yours again.

“Do you trust me?” he wondered into the kiss.

“Yes, but-.”

“…but what?” his nose touched yours as he pulled back, holding your gaze. “You’re just scared because Rafe’s intimidated you and beaten you down so much that you’re afraid to do anything for yourself.”

Was that the root of it? It was true, of course, but you also still felt uncomfortable.

“I don’t know…”

“Hasn’t Rafe also been the only guy you’ve ever been with?”

You gave a reluctant nod, and JJ smiled at you.

“…and you don’t think that has something to do with it? You being scared of what you don’t know…?”

That was also true, and JJ took your silence as consent, kissing you again as his hand trailed down your frame. You made a slight noise of protest when his hand slipped between your thighs, Rafe’s t-shirt riding up. The blond on top of you swallowed it down, refusing to break the kiss, and you jerked when his fingers brushed over your underwear.

“JJ,” you said when you turned your head away, pushing at his arm.

“It’s okay,” he breathed against your cheek. “Trust me.”

When you looked at him again, his fingers were already tracing circles over where your opening was through the fabric. His blond hair touched your forehead.

“I would never hurt you,” he assured you, more pressure from his fingers, now.

You involuntarily lifted your hips, and you didn’t know if it was to push him away or get closer. You wanted to push him away, not quite okay with taking things this far just yet. In truth, you didn’t know if you’d ever be, and you thought about what JJ said. Maybe you were just scared, but did you fix that by pushing yourself to do something you weren’t ready for?

You supposed it didn’t matter, anyway.

JJ’s fingers were circling your clit, panties resting on his hand as he touched you. His lips trailed kisses along your neck, and without thinking, you threw your head back. You forgot all about Rafe who was knocked out drunk in your bed, none the wiser to JJ’s fingers sliding between your lower lips. You could feel genuine excitement, something you hadn’t felt in a long time, and you sighed when he dragged his fingers between your folds.

You could tell that JJ was being mindful of whatever lasting damage there still might be from last week.

“You’re so soft,” he murmured, lips at the corner of your mouth. “…and wet.”

You shuddered at those words and the feel of the tips of his fingers just barely dipping into you before he pulled them out.

“Do you get this wet for Rafe?”

The mention of your boyfriend had your heart skipping a beat, but the feel of JJ’s fingers massaging your soaking cunt had you answering honestly.

“No,” you breathed, and you felt him smirk against your skin.

“I want to fuck you so bad,” he confessed.

“JJ,” you warned, hand on his wrist.

“I know,” he sighed. “I know, but a guy can dream.”

You pulled your lip between your teeth.

“I think about it a lot…pushing my cock into you and watching you stretch around me…”

When you softly moaned at that, JJ hummed.

“Do you think about it too? About milking me dry?”

You clenched around nothing, aching as he circled his fingers.

“…because I do…especially in his bed,” you dug your nails into his skin. “Fucking you until you come on his sheets, letting me fill you up right where he sleeps.”

You gently shuddered, your orgasm washing over you as you wrapped your other arm around him. JJ rode the wave with you, fingers rubbing against you, playing with you as you soaked them.

“Atta girl,” he whispered against your lips, and you felt slightly disbelieving at what had just occurred.

The proof was smeared on the inside of your thighs, but even when you watched JJ place his fingers into his mouth, it still didn’t feel real. JJ wouldn’t let you go as you caught your breath, kissing you again when you finally did.

“See,” he quietly told you. “That wasn’t so bad.”

He may have been right in some aspects, but JJ’s way around words and that tempting influence of his had you worried about what else you’d convince yourself you wanted.

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a-twistedheartslonging · 2 months

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Could you tell us about grumpy cat Leona in the nonhuman au?

Rubs hands together.

The big grumpy meow-meow that doesn't meow.

Has toe beans and the fur on his body is the same color as his ears and tail.

Ruggie was a little worried at first about you two getting together cuz of possible extra work or you replacing him for stuff, meaning less money to earn but, nah. You keep Leona from overworking him and actually help Ruggie with a lot of things. He is pleased.

It doesn't happen often, but he may roar in his sleep, and this is a real lion roar. He can sleep through it but you and everyone else in the dorm sure as hell can’t. He gets pissy if you wake him up to stop or go to sleep somewhere else. He will also lick you in his sleep.

youtube

It doesn't matter how small you are, he will straight up lay on you and smother you when he feels like it.

He won't tell you but man he loves your praise. So, keep praising his looks, strength, and intelligence. You are probably the only thing that makes him want to put the effort into showing off. It becomes mandatory for you to come to his Spelldrive matches, please, do it for the good of the school.

He’s actually really good about not nicking you with his claws.

Loves to bite, nibble, and scrape his fangs against your skin.

When he first brings you home the first thing his brother blurts out is “Why are they small?” His wife of course scolds him and tells him “You can't just ask humans why they're small!”

Scents you as soon as you are out of the shower, he will also stare right at the person you're talking to as he rubs his chin against the top of your head, scenting you in public.

You will groom his main for him.

He refuses to call your petting...well petting. He keeps calling it grooming. He will be demanding that you do it though. Kind of like those cats that yell and head bonk you until you do it, except he will straight up lay his whole body on you if you try ignoring it. I hope you like being smothered by big meaty lion-man tits.

Leona has lots of good traits but let's all remember that, in canon, Leona in plain terms: is an arrogant and domineering man who’s as prideful as he is lazy. He tends not to waste his energy on those he deems inferior to him and is only willing to cooperate with others if it benefits him in some way. In the same vein, he puts little to no effort into activities that don’t interest him, like when it comes to his studies.

Now don’t get me wrong, he's also the type to see it as unfair and demeaning to treat others differently based on their inherent status, and wants to compete with others on a level playing field. Still, we've seen he isn’t above using underhanded tactics to ensure success. The guy is willing to do whatever it takes to prove himself as a worthy leader, the dominant lion, even if it means playing dirty.

Also stated on the wiki “Leona has stated he is intimidated by the women of the Sunset Savanna because they are much physically stronger and more strong-willed than the men, including himself. Ruggie corroborates this statement. This follows the biology of many savanna animals, such as lions and hyenas, wherein the females are hunters and typically dominant in nature.” and “It's only at Night Raven College, where he's treated as an equal, that Leona attempts to seek the dominion he cannot achieve back home.”

Now add the extra dominance stuff that goes on with regular lions and add THAT onto a now even more beast-like Leona with his personality and with him actively looking to achieve that dominance plus you being a weak magicless human in a world of big strong beasts. You are not gonna be the one leading this relationship, even if you identify as a girl, cuz you are not a Sunset Savanna one.

Of course, Leona respects you though, he wouldn't have taken you as his mate if he didn't but…he’s a dick.

Now, your role? He expects certain to go like in the wild. You and him are your own pride with Ruggie and Jack being unofficial members. You know how Ruggie brings him food? That’s your task now. “Male lions defend the pride’s territory while females do most of the hunting.” Doesn't matter if you're a dude and…Ha, no he doesn't expect you to actually hunt. But he’s gonna want you to bring him food. (he gives you the money for it and then some, get yourself something nice) Expect his head on your lap, a pleased grin on his face as you hand-feed him.

If you tell him he went too far he’ll back off but…really likes comparing you to him, but in ways that show that he’s bigger and stronger. Teases you about being a weak little herbivore and how easy it would be to eat you.

His tongue has a bit of a rough texture but not nearly as rough as a regular lion's so you don't have to worry about the meat being scraped from your bones by it when he intensely grooms you.

(Talking about his junk and lion mating facts below)

Another thing he shares with his animal counterpart is penile spines, also known as barbs, luckily for you, lion beastmen evolved enough to wear they aren't the painful kind and are more like small nubs. Though they do have a similar reaction of stimulation ovulation and form a “genital lock”, basically it has a cat version of a knot. So, quickies aren't gonna be as quick and you will be subjected to mandatory after-sex cuddles.

As for the whole “going into heat” thing, female lions are only receptive to mating for a brief period, usually lasting three to four days, and they will go at it every 20-30 minutes for as long as the heat lasts. Humans don't go into heat, but the cooch havers do ovulate, which beastmen can in fact smell and will take this as you going into heat and he, unless told no, will react accordingly. Though…even with how he is it would be funny if it’s one of the times instincts kick in cuz…the thing is female lions can be pretty damn aggressive about it so imagine it’s the first time and he’s just laying there expectantly and looking annoyed, wondering why you haven't hopped on top of him and ravaged him yet.

Though another thing with lions is males will mount another male to excerpt dominance so imagine talking too much shit and you end up getting pinned down and humped by a pissed-off Leona.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #nonhuman au #twst leona #suggjestive #leona kingscholar #twisted wonderland leona #leona kingscholar/reader

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amuseoffyre · 1 year

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Was having a thought last night while watching episode 6 again, plus thinking about some meta I wrote the other day about Stede’s tendency to not be direct about things that make him happy/unhappy.

He inclines to use the passive voice, which makes sense given his past experience. His father mocked and belittled him when he dared to say “I thought that when I did marry”, Mary shouted at him when he said “I just think why waste our time here”.

So instead of voicing opinions, expressing what he’s really feeling, he skirts around it, implies rather than says directly:

we won’t be needing that - when offered an invitation to a posh do

don’t feel you have to rush off on my account. We’re all enjoying your company - “please don’t leave”

it’s a long way - trying to say he doesn’t want to go to China

And then we have one of the few times he expresses his feelings out loud and directly. It comes immediately after Calico Jack mocks him, rubs his relationship with Ed in Stede’s face, pisses on his shoes and then Ed offers to play a game that involves throwing hard things at his head. And he tries to do his usual technique of avoiding the situation - “I might just head back to the ship” - but it’s when Ed suggests that coconut wars will be fun, he actually lets slip what he’s actually feeling.

Given we have canonical history of Stede having hard things thrown at his head by people like Calico Jack, it’s no small wonder that Stede actually lets his feelings out in that moment.

“I’m not finding any of this a blast, actually. I don’t like to drink til I puke or get pelted with coconuts. And making a turtle fight a crab? That’s just mean. Honestly, Ed, I don’t like who you are around this guy.”

And if Jack hadn’t shown up, it could have been a very significant moment for them, both of them figuring out stuff, but instead, CJ gets in the way again and the next time Stede sees Ed, Ed chooses to leave him. And not just leave him, but refer back to the exchange on the beach as the reason.

“This is who I am, Stede. Do you see me now?”

No wonder he retreats into the passive language again and is so nervous the second time they’re having an important conversation on a beach. He doesn’t want to do it wrong like he did it wrong last time and drive Ed away.

#ofmd #our flag means death #stede bonnet #ofmd meta #ofmd thinkie thoughts

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tomodachi-to-koibito · 15 days

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at the very core of my person I am more than willing to eat crow, beg for forgiveness and say "Beau deMayo you weren't leading us on after all!"

buuuuut-

the shitty way Jean has been mishandled aside (and the snipped and rushed storylines for a few things)

I just can't get over the show runner saying baiting stuff like how Gambit x Rogue is the otp of the series and then proceeds to bring in the worst love triangle of the x men run and rub it in the noses of Gambit fans let alone Romy fans.

the fact that he's gleeful about perma killing Remy and says bullshit like how he needed to give him a crop top to make him likeable!???

HAH.

Gambit is always likeable and x men the animated series made him a fan favorite!

like-

It's okay for deMayo to have SOME favorites and boost em a little (that's a bonus of running a show right?) but with how some of these storylines have converged just to get to this point has been done so badly it's hurting my brain and now when somebody asks him what his five year plan was he brings up that HORRIBLE arc for Rogue where she marries Magneto and gives him a baby???

i mean-

my dude, my guy,

you're clearly super freaking biased to Magneto and for some reason ship him with Rogue to the point of torpedoing what was happening in the original series and is currently canon in the comics!???

Gambit and Rogue are McMarried, BEAU. and while you might NOT be McLoving it a LOT of people do

matter of fact-

WAY MORE PEOPLE THEN THE FEW WHO WANT ROGUE TO BE THE TROPHY WAIFU OF A MAN MORE THAN TWICE HER AGE IN A SHIP THAT IS WEIRD AND MAKES HER ACT LIKE A FROSTY BOSSY ASSHOLE

I read Age of Apocalypse! It had some really insane and cool stuff but it was also horrible for me as a Rogue fan!

She doesn't have to BE with Remy but for the love of GOD stop trying to make her into a stoic gurl boss. She's much more human then that.

i don't trust you, demayo. at all. and I'll gladly apologize (a little) if I'm super duper wrong and you aren't trying to force Rogue to make out with your favorite weathered GI Joe dolly. 🤡

#x men 97 #x men 97 spoilers?#u u i hope not #x men #rogue #romy #anti magneto #sorry boys he and i are on the outs rn #gambit x rogue

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bunniesnuggie · 2 years

Text

~ Little Protector ~

cg!Eddie Munson x (gn)little!reader

summary: You take care of your daddy after he comes homes from being a hero

Eddie stumbled through the door with only one thing on his mind. His angel. The only reason he even did all this crazy stuff in the first place. Everything is for you. Where are you? Normally when you spend the night at Eddie's, if he’s not there for bedtime, you stay up - waiting. You aren’t in front of the small, square tv in the living room, where you usually are, watching cartoons. You aren’t in the in the kitchen either, he’s still on high alert and not being able to find you is sending him into a frenzy,

“Angel! Where are you?! I'm back!”

He’s running to his room at this point, not even bothering to check the bathroom or if his uncle is even there. When the bedroom door flies open he swears everything froze for a second. There you were propped up on his pillows, walkie in one hand and your stuffy in another. You have your favorite paci he made for you hanging out of your mouth and all the lights are on. Your coloring books are still laid out on his floor, you really tried to stay up. He carefully makes his way over to you, leaning down to kiss your forehead, pausing for a second to breathe in the smell of your shampoo. He lifts you into a more comfortable position and you stir in his arms, twisting your body to rub your face on his chest, through blurry, slightly crusty you eyes you squint at him,

“Dada?”

“Hi angel, shhh it’s ok go back to sleep.”

He tries to set you down but all you do is whine and tighten your arms around him. He shifts you so your legs are wrapped around his waist and you both just sit there holding each other, squeezing tighter ever so often. Your whole body is shaking, he can feel it. He knows you were scared, you didn’t want to stay behind but if anything happened to you, Eddie wouldn’t be able to live with himself. After a moment his own shoulder start to shake,

“Sweetheart, I'm so sorry. I- I just didn’t want - you have to understand I did this to keep you safe. Whatever happened to Chrissy, cannot - will not happen to you. I had to make sure you would be safe here, angel. I’m so sorry I scared you,”

He was crying now, he’s supposed to be the one to comfort you, keep you safe and happy. And here he was crying to you and you were the one who was scared for your daddy. He feels like a joke, a horrid caregiver. Thinking you’d be better off with someone else as your daddy, but before he can even finish the thought, you are up and off his lap running to the corner of his room, for a second he’s worried he said something wrong, that you're running from him, he almost loses it. Until you grab his stuffed frog (named Phineas), your sippy filled with cold water, a few story books and your blankey. With your little arms full, you toddle over to his bed and set down the loot. Quickly flashing him a big smile and turing the big lights off and your little night light on,

“Here dada le me help chu,” you spoke from around you paci. You wrap your little blankey around him the best you can and set Phineas in his arms. You reach to hand him your sippy, which he great fully takes a sip from after kissing up your arms to tickle you. You giggle and squeal, just what he wanted, and set down the stories in front of him,

“Which story do you wan”

You were absolutely beaming, you were so excited to help daddy feel better like he does for you. And your daddy was never more sure that he'd die for you, you are such an amazing baby. So kind and caring, he doesn’t know what he did to deserve you. No one has ever made eddie feel so loved and cared for,

“You pick my angel, I know you’ll pick a good one”

You think for a moment before you got it, you jump up to run grab a new one your daddy wrote for you,

“Dis one!” you shouted running in, it’s a very recently written and very new saga of “The Adventures of Sir Edward the Noble Knight and His Precious Prince/ss (name that’s similar to yours)” my canon is that Eddie’s real name is Edmund btw this specific edition is about Sir Edward rescuing the royal cutie pie from monster under their bed. You plop next to him, but Eddie slips you over onto his lap and under the soft blanket. Before you start he gives you a small kiss to your nose and forehead,

“Once upon a time-“

You started, doing all the voices of the different characters, just like dada does. Making Eddie laugh as you attempted to sound like him, your normally sweet little baby voice deepened and distorted for comedic effect. Every now and then pausing to giggle at something that happens in the story or asking your daddy to help with big words. By the time you're nearing the end Eddie can feel your body start to sag and your voice start to drift off. He gently lays himself down almost flat and tries to coerce the book from your hands,

“Not done yet, Sir Edward still has to tuck in the prince/ss!” you lightly argued, you were trying to comfort him. What is he doing?

“Alright alright let’s finish, I'm sorry baby cakes. You are doing great!” you smile at that and finish up the story getting to your favorite part,

“And then Sir Edward laid the pretty prince/ss in their soft, fluffy bed. Tucked them into a little blankey burrito and placed a kiss on their forehead. The end!”

You closed the notebook and twisted around in eddie’s lap, wrapping your arms around his neck,

“You're brave, jus like him dada. Make me feel safe, you my hero,” you told him with a slight wobble to your lip. If he didn’t feel his heart shattering before, it was now. You are really the best baby ever, he loves you so much. Before he can say anything back you’re speaking again,

“an’ I always keep you safe, fight off da bad guys wif you,” your words started to slur more as you slipped deeper, “I wuv you dada.” No matter how hard you fought it, sleep was taking over. With watery eyes, Eddie squeezed you so hard he had to stop himself, in fear of breaking you. He carefully laid you down, slipped your paci into your mouth and tucked you into him. no matter what was going on with him, he loved to take care of you too.

“I love you my sweet angel, so so much”

A/N: ok so this was my first time writing anything more than headcanons, and even that i’m new to

so be nice please 🫠

Also the scene when they are comforting him with a story is inspired by a fic on here that I read about little reader comforting Bucky Barnes after a nightmare. I will tag it if i can find it!!

Also I'm trying really hard to make this as inclusive as possible so if you see anything too descriptive, let me know!!! I write the reader as small/little to help with regressing, it’s not a description of the reader's body!!!

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parachutingkitten · 2 months

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Thoughts on the entire Serpentine species being entombed? It always rubbed me the wrong way, especially since it led to the Anacondrai being doomed to extinction, and makes Pythor a canonical genocide survivor. In fact it really bothers me how the narrative doesn’t really explore how fucked up and disproportionate of a response that is. It feels like S4 kinda explored the idea that the Serpentine were victims as well, but it feels like there’s no real apology from humanity and all of the blame is shifted onto Chen, even though Chen couldn’t have dictated every decision humanity made.

Thoughts on imprisoning an entire race of people after war? Um, I'd say I'm anti. Feel pretty secure in that assessment.

I feel like it's not a secret that ninjago bungled the whole serpentine thing hard. Like they try and make some commentary on it in season 3 when they do the flip but... nah. Ninjago does not have the depth to tackle that subject. Shrugging before ignoring it forever was probably better than them trying to address it head on, honestly.

I will point out, while they do pin the start of the tensions on Chen, the entombing of everyone at the end of the war is on the EMs. They did that. To add a wrinkle into things, seems like magical entombment is a standard serpentine punishment? Idk. This stuff is wild.

#ninjago #asks #thanks anon!#serpentine

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nerves-nebula · 1 year

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I sometimes get uncomfortable around arguments about if certain characters are abusive or not- obviously I see this the most with 2012 tmnt and nobody really needs my opinion but I keep thinking about it so here’s some words to chew on.

Keep in mind I haven’t seen much of 2012 so I’ll mostly be talking about the WAY I see these discussions being had here, rather than the show itself.

I doubt the creators intended for the turtles to be abusive and I kind of just assume that everything they do is within the genre of slapstick kids show. But I also don’t think people who cringe away from the way they treat each other are reading too much into it.

I’ve seen people argue that ppl who think the brothers are abusive just don’t have siblings and that’s an insane take to me. Obviously its probably hyperbole in some instances but as someone with more siblings than most of the people I know, I 100% see the abuse reading of this series. It’s a very obvious idea to latch onto for me as someone who HAS been abused by my siblings- and who’s probably been abusive too.

The main thing that really gets under my skin is when people point out how much the turtles actually care about each other as evidence against abuse. Cause that doesn’t make any sense ??? you can abuse people you love and care about deeply.

And it really rubs me the wrong way when I see a post that’s like Raph can’t be abusive because he does X nice/cute things with Mikey or something like. That’s not how abuse works. You guys have to know that right?? Abuse isn’t just a person being mean 24/7 without pause.

A bit of a tangent coming up, but growing up, I really hated Mabel from gravity falls. not because she is inherently any more annoying or selfish or anything than other characters but because the way she treated dipper was extremely triggering for me as a child with a lot of anxiety. Like if Mabel was real and my sibling, I would’ve considered a lot of the shit she did abusive. Obviously I’m normal about her now cause I’m not 12 anymore but the biggest hurdle about watching that show when I was younger was that I would sometimes be brought to tears of frustration, imagining how scared and distressed I’d be if Mabel did that shit to me.

THE POINT of this tangent is that saying “the 2012 turtles aren’t abusive because I do that stuff with my siblings all the time/cause teenage boys are just like that” isn’t a genuine critique because abuse isn’t just about the action it’s about the relationship. Punching your sibling who’s actually ok with being punched isn’t abuse. Punching your sibling who really doesn’t want you to, and who you KNOW really doesn’t want you to, and who you KNOW would be genuinely upset by being punched? That is abuse.

And I find it annoying because I think we’re all aware that abuse was likely not the intent of the show. (Probably not even the text of the show but once again can’t say for sure) Maybe some dysfunction for drama, but probably not abuse, so you’re really just arguing against someone’s headcanon/personal interpretation of this show. And it’s like.. ok you have a different reading cool I guess.

In the show they aren’t treated as abusive, but fandoms are built around exploring different aspects of art that weren’t explored in canon. So I guess idk why this is a big deal.

Idk I think people have this idea that abusive = evil and always wrong. But abuse is just someone hurting you repeatedly and refusing to stop for whatever reason.

And with a show like 2012 where it’s all played for laughs it can be hard to tell if that’s how they are with each other because they’re ok with it or if that’s how they are cause they don’t know any other way. The turtles are kind of really mean in 2012, and wether that’s a familiarity kind of meanness or not is up to you in fandom, yknow?

Does Mikey actually consider Raph hitting him as like a fun part if their banter or is he coping with jokes about being physically abused? You decide! Like genuinely it can be either and I think that’s fun!

I mean obviously you all know what i’d pick, but that’s because I’m blissfully aware of what I want out of stories and what i want is nuanced discussions of abuse.

Personally, I acted very similarly to the 2012 turtles when living with my siblings, but I didn’t actually fucking like it. It was a defense mechanism because being genuine would only be met with ridicule. So I’m not inclined to agree that it’s fine because it’s just what they do.

Once again though, I doubt it was on purpose. And if you don’t think that they’re abusive then congrats! The show probably doesn’t either! So I just don’t see why people get super upset about it. Don’t you love that someone got a different story out of the same media??

Anyway obviously it doesn’t super matter and I don’t really have a horse in this race. I just got a bit annoyed with the way abuse is discussed and as a hobbyist Abuse Analyst I thought I’d weigh in.

I wrote this instead of going to sleep and it’s sooo late and also so much longer that I meant for it to be… y’all better not have bad takes in response or I’ll be annoyed as hell tomorrow morning, guh.

#nnstuff #rambling #tmnt 2012 #abuse tw #child abuse tw

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hotrawchicken · 29 days

Text

Thinking About Percico/Nicercy Parallels With Hercules’ I Won’t Say (I’m In Love)

Or, Cupid confronts Nico about his feelings for Percy, but it’s Hercules’ I Won’t Say (I’m In love)

Hear me out, love. It came to me like a flash of lightning, like a prophecy. Now I’m consumed by ungodsly urge to draw this and even write a fic to accompany it, I am in shambles. Someone might’ve rambled about this in their head before too, and I don’t wanna be alone because I Won’t Say I’m In Love takes the (blue) cake.

It’s the Nico/Percy song where Nico admits he’s in love… the whole song screams the interrogation with Cupid. Nico as Megara. Percy as Hercules. Chiron’s there! Hades is tired and just wants his son to stop fking around with the hero (errand boy) of Olympus on earth and come back home to the Underworld. And Cupid is the muses trying to get Nico to admit he’s in love with Perseus Jackson, Hero of Olympus. But Nico breaks out into song about how he’s never ever saying it, "No chance, no way!" not out loud anyway. AAAACK. Please hear me out:

— No man is worth the aggravation

That's ancient history, been there, done that!

(Canon Nico, falling time and time again for Percy. ‘I say I hate you, but I’m secretly in love with you’. Ancient history. Helping Percy and having his actions misunderstood because he’s the spawn of Hades. Classic. He does it anyway. Again and again. Ancient history. Sacrifice after sacrifice. Percy doesn’t know. Been there, done that. Is he tired of it? Percy probably hates him by now. Well, Nico loves him. Nico would offer his heart in a heartbeat, even if Percy ends up taking someone else’s. Is he tired of it? Well, he loves him. Styx, he loves him.)

— Who'd'ya think you're kiddin'

He's the Earth and heaven to you

(Cupid, taunting Nico. Canon Nico admired Percy as a hero straight (ha!) out of Mythomagic when he first met him. They bump into each other randomly throughout the years, and Nico doesn’t know if he wants to smack Percy on the head or kiss hi—Time and time again, he’s done so much to help Percy behind the scenes, with varied reception and results, and he did it for Percy damnit. He loved Percy. He loves Percy. He’s the earth and heaven. He likes blue things. He has this stupid smile. He’s also just Percy.)

— Try to keep it hidden

Honey, we can see right through you

Girl, ya can't conceal it

We know how ya feel and

Who you're thinking of

(Cupid sees through Nico’s denial, he knows it’s Percy Jackson that Nico’s in love with, and he’s really rubbing it in lmao)

— No chance, no way

I won't say it, no, no (Nico.)

— You swoon, you sigh

Why deny it, uh-oh (Cupid’s wiggling his eyebrows bro, Nico wants to strangle this man.)

— I thought my heart had learned its lesson

It feels so good when you start out

My head is screaming get a grip, girl

Unless you're dying to cry your heart out oh

(Nico doesn’t want to tell Percy, the time he was born in already made him scared of who he was. How would it be different now? And if he tells Percy, he just expects it to hurt. So Nico won’t. He’s terrified. He keeps telling himself to get it together. He can’t fall apart after falling this deeply.)

— You keep on denying

Who you are and how you're feeling

Baby, we're not buying

(Cupid on Nico denying his feelings for Percy and his attraction to boys in general. Nico feels guilty about having these feelings, and he tells himself it’s not normal, Percy would be disgusted, Percy would never like him back, etc. Internalized stuff. He hates himself for feeling this way and he wishes he was just… normal. But Percy’s there. The oh-so-mighty hero of Olympus. Secretly a dork. And gods above and below, Nico loves him.)

— When ya gonna own up

That ya got, got, got it bad

(Here Cupid’s just taunting Nico at this point, ‘Say it, say you love him, admit you’re in love with him, you know it’s true’.)

— You're way off base

I won't say it

Get off my case ("You’re wrong. Get off my case, Cupid!" — Nico, definitely.)

I won't say it

— At least out loud,

I won't say I'm in love

(Cupid shape-shifts into the likeness of his mother.

Maria strokes Nico’s cheek, and gently holds his face. Her face is warm but her skin is cold.

"Oh don’t be proud, it’s okay darling, you’re in love."

Nico aches. And, barely a whisper,

"At least out loud," barely a whisper, Nico.

He chokes. Cupid grins.

"I won’t say I’m in love.")

youtube

#percico #nicercy #pernico #nico x percy #nico di angelo #percy jackson #percy jackson and the olympians #hercules #percy jackson musical #hercules and megara get a happy ending in the movie so they’re getting a happy ending in my head #percy jackson hercules au #pjo headcanon #Youtube

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bell4lan · 2 years

Text

Quality Time

Genre: Fluff and crack (?) idk it's silly

CW: mentions of heats, suggestive dialogue, very dialogue heavy, hickies (only suggestive thing that happens i promise), talks of sex, mpreg mentions but its not canon, breeding mentions, i swear this is a fluff fic they just had some talks abt dirty things

DNI: NON-MLM/NBLM, fujoshis, mlm/nblm fetishizers

Character(s)/Reader: Tighnari and GN reader but I wrote it with men and non-binary people in mind, 1 Kaeya mention

The sound of your backpack hitting the floor filled your bedroom as you flopped onto your bed. You were wiped from the class you just had, not even because it was hard, but because of how far it was from your dorm. It started snowing right before class ended, which meant you had to tread through snow for a long distance. It wasn't like you could've drove since Tighnari took your car to visit his family.

Speaking of Tighnari, he was coming back today. You wish you could get excited, but you were exhausted. The snow really did a number on your already sore legs.

You heard the front door jiggle as someone unlocked it. Only one other person besides you had a key, so you weren't panicked. You heard the front door shut and things shuffle around for a while. You knew it was Tighnari getting unpacked and changed.

You heard footsteps coming towards your room and saw your gorgeous boyfriend walk in, dressed in a hoodie and shorts since the heater was on.

You turned on your back and held out your arms to him. "Hi baby, I missed you." You said to him as he laid down on you.

"I missed you too (Name)." He kissed your lips passionately and you gladly returned it. You wrapped your arms around him and pulled away asking him about his trip. You played with his hair as you listened to the stories he told about his family. You couldn't help but smile when you heard him stumble over his words when you started petting his ears.

He stopped talking after a bit and relaxed on you, almost falling asleep from how comforting your pets were. He started nuzzling more into you when suddenly, his head shot up and his ears laid back.

"What's wrong?" You asked while rubbing his lower back. He glared at you and put his face in your neck, licking and biting it.

"Wh- Tighnari what is up with you." You squirmed slightly from the feeling of him sucking on your neck and saw his tail wagging more than usual. He was never usually like this, he usually waits for you to initiate stuff like this.

"G-gosh are you in heat or something?" You joked as you felt him leave more marks.

"That's not til June." He mumbles, completely serious with his answer. You pulled him away from your neck so you could be face to face with him.

"Wait...you actually have heats?" You asked sort of wide eyed.

"Y-yeah..." He looked off to the side, ears still down and tail calming down.

"But you said no when I asked you before." You faked a pout when you realized he lied to you.

"It's embarrassing to admit every once a year you feel this primal need to breed." He said as he laid back down on you.

"Need to breed? Gosh Tighnari you're so dirty." You teased as you went back to rubbing his back. He glared at you again, though this time it was paired with a red hue on his face.

You started petting his ears again trying to get him to calm down. "Can you tell me why you decided to attack my neck?" You laughed out.

"I smelled someone else on you..." He mumbled a bit shyly.

"Huh? Who?" You asked. You had been hanging out with your friends a lot, but it's not like you had done anything with them (iykwim).

"That one blue haired pirate guy." He growled as he gripped onto your hoodie. You started laughing at his spot on description.

"Oh my god, Kaeya? I guess that makes sense, I did have to carry him home when he was drunk. That wasn't long after you left though and i've taken so many showers since then. Can you really still smell him?" Tighnari relaxed as he heard your explanation and started explaining that he had a way better sense of smell than non-hybrid people. You already knew that of course, but you didn't know it was that much stronger than non-hybrids.

"Did you think I did anything with him?" Tighnari shook his head.

"No...I just hated smelling someone else on you." He confessed, not looking at you. You smiled and gave him a kiss on the head. You started teasing him about his jealousy and possessiveness earning a defensive Tighnari in return.

You both had calmed down and cuddled with each other for a bit. It was relaxing, until you broke the silence.

"Sooo...when you're in heat do you feel the need to breed others or be bred?" Tighnari's faced became a bright shade of red and he hid his face in your chest, flattening his ears again so they don't bother you.

"Ughhh I knew i'd regret telling you." He groaned.

"Hey i'm just curious!" You defended in a light hearted tone. You kept encouraging an answer until he finally responded.

"I...don't have a preference. It depends on how I feel at the time." He said, voice shaking from embarrassment. You nodded and asked more questions about his heats, making him even more flustered than he was. He knew you were genuinely curious under all the teasing, so he answered your questions the best he could.

"Can you be bred?" You jokingly asked. He didn't seem to get your joke until a few seconds after.

"Are you asking if I can get pregnant?" He hissed.

You just giggled and he stared at you like you were the dumbest person alive.

He sighs, "Of course not you dummy." He flicked your forehead and you whined out an "ow". He kissed the spot he flicked, making you smile at him.

"Could I ever help with your heats?" You asked in full seriousness.

"What? No."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to bother you or depend on you. Plus, I might get used to it and who knows what will happen if we ever break up." He explains. When he said the last sentence, he got a sad look in his eyes.

"Hey if you think you can get rid of me you're wrong." You said as you attacked his face with kisses. Tighnari couldn't help but smile and laugh softly. Once you stopped, you flipped the both of you over so you were hovering over him. His ears twitched in curiosity.

"I love you." You whispered as you admired his looks, lips almost touching his.

"I love you too." He breathes out and connects his lips to yours. You both kissed each other lovingly, not wanting to break the beautiful kiss.

Eventually, you did pull away to catch your breath, making Tighnari frown.

"Now it's your turn to get marked." You said playfully. Tighnari's ears twitched again at your words.

"I guess it's only fair." He said with a smile and exposed more of his neck.

---------------------------------------------------

I had to look up when foxes go into heat for this fanfic so you guys better like it.

#genshin impact x male reader #genshin x male reader #tighnari x male reader #genshin fluff #tighnari fluff #tighnari x gn reader #genshin x gn reader #genshin impact x gn reader

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lesbiansforlaurencezvahl · 5 days

Note

soooo random but what’s your opinion on most popular aphmau ships ?

OMG HIIII IM HONORED..... OKAY OKAY SO

first off I do not want to yuck anyone's yum!! I love that people love all of these ships and can find joy in it. Its my biggest pet peeve that people hate on people for loving stuff. I love that others love stuff :( these r just my personal taste!!

i fucking hate aarmau lol <3 it can burn in hell and I think its so bad and poorly written

garrence is cute! its not my go-to ship and I have no stronggg attachment to it but my best friends really really like it and I like exploring their dynamic + writing fic 4 them :3

i would die for laurmau. clenches my fist. they are. they are. they are the best thing on this planet. I've written a miny essay about it just because. when I have my Aphmau hyperfix I am actually so insane about them. @metelis-favorite once watched me remember laurmau existed. and then start to SHAKE. because I loved them so much. it was HUMBLING.

garmau is interesting becauseeee uhhhh I go back and forth. I don't think about them really romantically as a couple? again neutral on that.

(its funny because I lived in my sorority house this year and brought my Laurence doll @garrothromeave got for me and my roommate was like "oh we need to have garroth representation because I watched this when I was younger and I'm a .garroth stan" so we printed out a picture of garroth and they hung out together all year underneath the shotglass with boobs. UHHH and we would watch mcd. again. IN MY SORORITY HOUSE. HORRIFYING. and we would fight over garmau vs laurmau. society is HEALING.)

however I ADORE them as a platonic couple/soulmate kinda deal. they're so so so sweet!! again @garrothromeave and I have a playlist about em and I'd love to talk about it more :3

i LOVE LOVE LOVE garrencemau. its the perfect ship. again its interesting because I'm not passionate about garrence/garmau but I ADORE garrencemau its genuinely such a perfect ship. so cute.

i also love love zoeymau! one of the things I first got into when I got into Aphmau again. its so sweet. its THEE lesbian yearning. its so sweet. makes me go sniff sniff. I also love the angst potential with it. its so sweet :(( what do you MEAN Zoey gave up her immortality just to bring back Aphmau. what do you MEAN they live together and have two sons? WHAT THE FUCK JESSICA WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEYRE NOT MARRIED??

dante x kc is the cutest fucking shit in the WORLD. why weren't they canon in mystreet. we were robbed. ROBBED I TELL YOU. THEYRE SO SWEET. domestic bliss. THEE married hets ever. @bisexualsfordante says they should be called purple which is really cute

i don't care for zanechan. it feels lazy that they're shipped together. oh ones emo and ones pink? pack it up. bubbline wannabe or travlyn. it rubs me the wrong way and it feels underdeveloped lol

i have no real opinions on katemau but its cute! thumbs up to lesbians (heart eyes)

if you have any other ships you want me to talk about lmk!! I'm super hyperfixated on UHHH. Irene x Xavier (that guy that was mentioned ONCE LOL) so I don't care about any other ships. but I love aphmau :)

#aphmau #aphblr #laurmau #garmau #aarmay #garrance #garrence #danchan #zanechan #travlyn #zoeymay #garrancemau #katemau

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kanansdume · 5 months

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Hello! Your pro-Jedi posts are so precious in mostly anti-Jedi rhetoric circulating around fandom and canon (sadly). So I wanted to ask: have you read a novel Ashoka by E.K.Johnson? If you haven’t, I hope you don’t mind some spoilers and a small rant.

I didn’t expect a lot while getting to it, but it still rubbed me wrong. Cannot remember specifically, but the general idea was ‘The Jedi were so trapped in the past and dogmatic, so they’re partially to blame for their downfall’. After reading lots of Jedi-defending meta, it just hurts.

One moment I remember most, though. After Ahsoka and Bail Organa save population of a small planet, occupied by the Empire, Bail calls her a Jedi.

Ahsoka: I’m no Jedi.

Bail: But you act like one.

And I’m just: yes! Yes, you do act like a Jedi! You meditate the Jedi way, you think the Jedi way – how come you’re not a Jedi? Only because you weren’t knighted? Meta-speaking, Kanan, Ezra and Luke also weren’t fully trained by the community, but they still are Jedi. Especially in a non-Jedi Imperial world. And non-Force-sensitive population in-universe won’t see the difference between a fully-trained Jedi Knight and an almost fully-trained Jedi Padawan – they’re still ‘Jedi’ to them.

I felt like this novel enforces the current idea that Ahsoka is better that ‘those stupid old dogmatic Jedi of the Prequels’. Sorry for the rant and thanks for reading.

Thank-you, I'm glad you've liked what I've managed to contribute to the pro Jedi fandom!

As for the Ahsoka novel, I haven't read it (but I don't mind spoilers since I don't ever plan to). I read like the first two thirds of Queen's Peril and then got bored and then I started hearing some pretty nasty things about E.K. Johnston and have refused to ever pick it back up again or ever read another of her books. So I'm not at all shocked that she's part of the Jedi critical crowd. It's even LESS shocking that it came out within the Ahsoka novel, just given the way Ahsoka as a character has been going for YEARS. It sounds like it's handling the issue in the same basic way a lot of people have done, nothing unique there.

If I'm willing to try to re-interpret the "I'm no Jedi" stuff into a more pro Jedi version, Ahsoka doesn't see herself as a Jedi because, unlike all of those other characters, Ahsoka LEFT the Order before it was destroyed and before she officially completed her training and never rejoined it. Kanan never left it at all, it was just destroyed around him (the same is true for Cal Kestis from the Jedi games). And he does TECHNICALLY get Knighted by Yoda during Rebels and takes on a Padawan, hallmarks of a Jedi Knight. Ezra and Luke never had an Order to join to begin with, so their willingness to identify themselves as Jedi isn't dependent on having officially joined the right organization so much as it is about having learned from someone else who identifies as a Jedi and being told their training is complete. Both Ezra and Luke kind-of reach that point with Kanan and Yoda, so they never question their identity as Jedi.

Ahsoka is in the VERY unique position of having not been a Jedi OFFICIALLY when the Order was destroyed, which leaves her in slightly more limbo than most others. She HAD the ability to rejoin it before it was destroyed, she just didn't, and now she has to kind-of move away from the idea of needing to be a part of the Order before she can call herself a real Jedi. She also never has a master tell her she's done with training. In both Kanan and Cal's cases, their masters died to protect them and so someone else (Yoda and Cere) has to step in to finish the job. For Ahsoka, her master is STILL ALIVE, he's just now a Sith and is trying to kill her. Nobody steps in to try to finish the job he started with Ahsoka (nor does Ahsoka really ever seem that open to it). This ALSO leaves her in a little bit of limbo in a way nobody else is.

So I'm generally willing to sort-of re-interpret her choosing not to identify as a Jedi within this context to make it less about feeling like she's better than all the other Jedi and more that she feels STUCK in how to get back to that identity in a way nobody else is. Just because she still meditates and tries to help people doesn't make her officially a Jedi when she intentionally left the Order for a reason. She chose to stop being a Jedi for a reason. In the Prequels Era, just being a kind Force sensitive person didn't make you a Jedi, so it works for me that Ahsoka would insist that she ISN'T one for a while, even when she looks a lot like one to an outside perspective. I could even see a more Jedi positive narrative taking the fact that she still acts and thinks like a Jedi in an interesting direction for her.

It's easier to utilize that interpretation in Rebels where Ahsoka is GENERALLY more positive about the Jedi and, despite not really identifying as one herself, she seems fine with getting lumped in as a Jedi along with Kanan and Ezra. She intentionally seeks Kanan and Ezra out for "Jedi stuff" once or twice during season 2. She ONLY brings out the "I'm no Jedi" line when Anakin throws the Jedi (and the fact that she'd left the Order) in her face during their confrontation before he's explicitly revealed to be Anakin (which means Ahsoka can still pretend he's NOT Anakin and be angry that this is the person who KILLED Anakin instead). She seems like she might be on the path towards becoming a Jedi again by following these two people who are slightly further ahead on that path than she is (and then she sees Anakin as Vader and she gets blown right off of that path all over again apparently). Ahsoka isn't the main character of Rebels and the entire narrative is about Ezra and Kanan coming together as teacher and student to become true Jedi by learning compassion and selflessness via sacrifice. Ahsoka can't overshadow or outshine the two main characters by making her seem BETTER than the two characters who are explicitly learning to become Jedi by emulating Prequels Jedi, which is helping her.

It's HARDER to utilize this interpretation within something like, say, the Ahsoka show, where it's absolutely clear that its take on the Jedi is NEGATIVE. Sabine calls herself a Jedi, other people call her a Jedi, but Ahsoka explicitly states that she doesn't want Sabine to be a Jedi AT ALL and never identifies as one herself. She calls the Jedi failures and implies that it's because they were elitist. She and Sabine constantly refuse to abide by Huyang's standard Jedi protocols and seem to see them as useless and old-fashioned. There isn't a SINGLE thing about the Jedi that is represented as positive in this show, which makes it decidedly difficult to pretend that Ahsoka is refusing to identify as a Jedi simply because she's in a particular emotional limbo about it that she needs to work out. Instead, Ahsoka refuses to identify as a Jedi because she associates being a Jedi with being an elitist asshole apparently and might only start reclaiming the title when she decides that she can sort-of... be a new kind of Jedi that's better than the old ones (not unlike what Baylan claims to be doing with Shin). It's DECIDEDLY anti Jedi in tone and I'm generally unwilling to try to rework the entire fucked up narrative of the show to try to pretend that it isn't. The Ahsoka show is an explicitly anti Jedi narrative and that's just... the facts of the matter. It sucks, but it's true. It's not worth me putting in any more work than that.

I haven't read the Ahsoka novel, so I don't know whether its tone is closer to Rebels or the Ahsoka show. If it feels to you closer to how the Ahsoka show landed, my advice would be to just purge it from your canon. That's the nice thing about Star Wars, you can pick and choose what's canon to you and what isn't. If it doesn't work for you, you can straight up pretend it doesn't exist. As far as I'm concerned, the Ahsoka show never happened. It's stupid and doesn't deserve to be considered within my canon. If, however, it feels closer to how Rebels ended up, my advice is to see if you can find some way to re-interpret some of the more Jedi critical pieces or just pretend THOSE parts don't exist and separate it out from the parts you DO enjoy.

#star wars #ek johnston #ahsoka novel #ahsoka tano #jedi #pro jedi #ahsoka critical #ahsoka tano critical #star wars rebels #anti ahsoka show #ahsoka show critical #ahsoka show

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ken-dom · 6 months

Text

What’s Left In Me

Lars Lindstrom x Bianca

2.2k words

Summary: Lars needs to make sure Bianca knows she belongs to him, and really, isn’t there only one way to do that?

Author’s notes: Goosecord made me do it (never mind that I wanted to shhh). Title is song lyrics from the Lars playlist as usual

Warnings/content: nsfw, possessive Lars, use of a sex doll, loss of virginity?, fingering, clothed sex, mention of oral sex, if you’re not aware Bianca is a sex doll but he doesn’t canonically use her for sex, I guess the dove isn’t dead but I would still be very weary of eating it, seriously please do not read this if you don’t like the idea of Lars getting frisky with Bianca — or if you think he never would (I don’t really disagree but I HAD to explore it, please forgive me and please skip this if it's not for you)

‘Talk to her, Lars,’ Karin soothed, rubbing at Lars’s back. ‘Go on.’

Lars ignored the slowly burning warmth where her hand massaged circles between his shoulder blades. He had enough layers on after all, and with a deep breath, he silently reminded himself that it wasn’t her fault she needed to touch people so much.

‘What if she’s mad at me,’ he uttered under his breath, body stuck somewhere between trembling and freezing up.

He did want to speak to Bianca though. He wanted… No. He was too scared to think it.

‘I’m sure if you explain how you’ve been feeling and hear her out, she won’t be mad at you. She loves you, Lars. More than anything.’

Lars nodded with a forced smile and stood so abruptly, Karin’s hand dropped to the sofa with a soft thud.

He turned back to her, lost for words, then forward forward again, flexing his fingers and squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before heading toward the stairs.

Bianca had gone straight up to the pink room when she returned home. She didn’t even acknowledge Lars. And he couldn’t actually blame her when he thought about it.

He felt his heart hammering in his chest as he climbed. When he reached the top, Lars could see that the door of the pink room was ajar, and he took another deep, steadying breath as he approached it and knocked gently. A stark contrast to the energy with which he’d roared at her before she left.

‘Bianca,’ he whispered through the crack in the door, and to his relief she finally acknowledged him.

Lars entered slowly with his head hung low. He didn’t think she seemed put off by his presence, so he clicked the door shut behind him and pressed on.

Bianca was relaxing against the pillow, already in her pretty nightdress. He took a seat on the mattress by her feet, careful not to disturb her. She looked beautiful, he thought.

‘Bianca, I’m sorry,’ he started quietly, turning his body to face her properly and placing a gentle hand on her bare shin without thinking. ‘I shouldn’t have spoken to you that way. It- it wasn’t really about Scrabble. I mean, I do love our Scrabble nights, but it was more about how I’ve been… feeling recently.’

Bianca listened intently as Lars felt the floodgates open. He had always loved how she listened. She had so many skills.

‘I… well, see, when you came here to be with me, I thought it would be just that; me and you. You know? That I’d have you all to myself. And now you’re so busy all the time, even busier than I am, and I have a lot of stuff to do – you should see how much wood I chopped tonight while you were out!’ Lars’s thumb had begun to massage slow, soothing shapes into Bianca’s leg. ‘You know what the thing is, though? Everybody wants a piece of you, but-’

Lars knew where he wanted that sentence to go, but something about it felt wrong, so he stopped himself. Bianca, of course, picked up on the sudden change of atmosphere, and as a result Lars whipped his hand away from her leg, realising he’d been caressing the flesh just below her knee the whole time he’d been talking.

Only… she hadn’t shied away from it. And neither had he. It actually felt pretty good.

‘Bianca…’

Hands trembling, he slowly reached back to her, pushing the hem of her nightgown up, above her knees.

‘Bianca… are you sure about this?’

She agreed, and before he knew it, his hand was firmly beneath the skirt of her nightdress, tenderly rubbing at her thigh.

‘What was I going to say? I suppose I should be honest with you, I owe you that much at least.’

Lars was talking with incredibly measured precision,watching his hand move hypnotically beneath the thin pink fabric. He could feel Bianca nodding her encouragement for him to go on.

Something snapped inside him. It wasn’t like earlier, when he’d needed to chop wood to calm himself. This was a different, urgent kind of need that his first instinct was to try and suppress.

‘I was going to say that, lately, everybody wants a piece of you,’ he breathed, his whispered voice trembling a little until he finally growled, ‘but you’re supposed to be mine.’

With both hands, he tugged Bianca downward on the bed, shifting to kneel between her legs. Two strong hands grabbed her thighs and spread them, getting her into a comfortable position.

He froze then, reality suddenly dawning on him.

He was in Gus and Karin’s house right now, and Karin was downstairs, so they’d need to be quiet. He and Bianca weren’t married, which for some reason made his cock twitch in his trousers despite the clench in his gut. And to top it off, Lars was a virgin.

He’d been too scared to ask Bianca, assuming that she was a virgin too. She must be. But he supposed that was about to change.

He’d never intended to do this. To defile her. Especially not before marriage. Especially not so soon after she arrived here, but he’d been curious, he couldn’t deny, and tonight the final straw was the spark he felt when he thought about how she was his and his only. How if he claimed her in a way no one else could, she would truly belong to him, even if she was out every night of the week.

Lars blinked furiously and then squeezed his eyes shut, fingers bruisingly rough on Bianca’s tender thighs.

He didn’t have any condoms. Why would he? He thought briefly about checking for some in Gus and Karin’s bathroom, but since Bianca couldn’t have children of her own, and they were both virgins, he thought better of interrupting. He did want to claim her after all, and what better way to do that than pump her full to the brim?

Strangely, Bianca had arrived complete with a pitifully small tube of lube included in the crate. Lars had dropped it into his pocket last minute when disposing of the packaging she’d arrived in, not wanting anyone to find it in his trash and think him some sort of deviant. No, better to keep it safe and out of sight.

He was wearing the same trousers tonight, as luck would have it. He fished it out of his pocket and held it up for Bianca to see.

‘See? It’ll help you feel more comfortable.’

He flashed her a big smile and removed the lid, squeezing half the contents into his palm and rubbing his hands together to warm it.

‘Let me help you…’

His hand disappeared up her nightgown again, fumbling with her underwear briefly before easily slipping a finger inside.

‘Oh, you’re already so prepared for me… does this feel good? You like my fingers?’ he cooed, massaging her folds with his thumb as his finger pumped carefully, coating her, inside and out, in the slippery fluid. ‘Shhh… remember we need to be quiet!’

Heat flooded his core as he watched her take his fingers, cock straining against the inside of his trousers now, and for the first time in his life he felt like he needed more. Like he needed to remove layers and feel touch and be closer.

He gently removed his hand from between Bianca’s thighs and hastily pulled his sweater over his head, tearing his shirt and tie away too, revealing the first of his two underlayers, long sleeves and unbuttoned at the neck.

He wouldn’t take off Bianca’s nightgown, though. Some things were just too sacred, and he could respect her enough to let her keep it on. Perhaps until they were married, at least, then he could undress her slowly and make every square inch of her shiver with anticipation for him.

Tonight he just needed to make her entirely his, and he knew that it was what she wanted – no, needed, too.

He crawled forward and hovered over her, eyes roaming her pretty face, lingering on her lips.

‘We’ll be married one day soon,’ he whispered through a crooked smile, ‘so it doesn’t matter really. You’re not worried about that, are you?’

Lars’s lips met Bianca’s in a desperate, hungry kiss, and when he pulled away a tear fell from his eye, dropping onto her flawless cheek.

‘You’re so beautiful,’ he sniffled, ‘so beautiful… hey, don’t cry.’

He wiped his spilled tear from her cheek as if it were her own.

‘Do you really want this? With me?’

Lars breathed a sigh of relief. ‘Alright,’ he chuckled, ‘and don’t worry, ok? I’ll be gentle with you.’

With one hand he clumsily unfastened and pushed his trousers down enough to free his aching cock, guiding it to her entrance.

‘If it hurts, just tell me, alright? We can take it slow,’ he whispered, carefully pushing in and hissing at the sensation of her walls enveloping his length. ‘Ah! You’re so… so wet and… and tight…’

She felt so good, precum leaked steadily from his tip already despite not having moved yet.

He could feel her stretching around him, feel her pleasure-pain unfold as he stilled and let her adjust to his size.

‘I know, I know, you’ll get used to it, sweetheart. I’ll make it feel good, ok? Are you ready?’

His hips rolled slowly at first, increasing in speed with every impatient thrust. Bianca seemed to clench around him as he found his rhythm, and he managed to wrap one of her legs up and around his waist as he drove into her harder, a hand sneaking between their bodies to explore her folds again.

‘Y-you like that?’ he whispered breathlessly. ‘You gonna cum for me?’

With his other hand, he gripped her jaw between his thumb and forefinger, forcing her to look at him, her lips popping open as he squeezed.

‘You are gonna cum for me, aren’t you?’ he growled, pressing his forehead to hers, ‘Because you- are- mine. Say it. Say that you’re- mine.’

His words were punctuated with the snapping of his hips, and Bianca’s heel dug into his lower back in a silent plea for more, which he eagerly gave as he awaited her response.

The bed creaked beneath them as Lars went harder. Bianca didn’t seem to care about the noise, or the integrity of the furniture, when she was in the throes of passion with Lars. She must really have wanted him after all.

When Lars was satisfied that Bianca understood who she belonged to, he pressed his big, warm palm over her mouth, keeping any other noise she might make to a minimum. He could feel he was close to release and knew that she must be too by the way she was arching her back off the bed.

‘Oh… ohhh- mmh… you belong to me. You understand? No one else can- ugh!- do this to you. No one else can make you- ha!- feel like th- ohhhhnnggmmnn-’

Lars felt a burst of uncontrollable heat spread through every part of his body, his vision turning white as a thick creamy rope erupted from his tip and filled Bianca, who he could feel was mid-orgasm already. He continued to fuck erratically into her and eagerly massaging her clit until he felt his cock softening inside her walls, and collapsed in a heap on top of her.

‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry, are you ok?’ Lars muttered breathlessly, pulling himself up to hover a mere inch from her face, her beautiful eyes sparkling up at him.

He kissed her sweetly. So sweetly you’d never guess he’d just filled her with his seed in a frenzied culmination of his deepest, darkest thoughts and feelings.

He shifted his hips to pull out, feeling a trickle of warm wetness follow.

‘Don’t worry about the mess, ok? I’ll clean us both up. Wait right there.’

And Bianca did just that while Lars, with hastily fastened trousers and hair in disarray, shuffled off down the hallway to the nearest bathroom to fetch a towel.

When he returned, he paused in the doorway to just look at her. She really was perfect.

Half an hour later, and after a hurried conversation with Karin during which Lars avoided eye contact and assured her he had firmly made up with Bianca and that he’d apologised thoroughly, he was laid in bed, struggling to sleep. He couldn’t stop thinking about her, about how he should be with her now, holding her in his arms and whispering sweet nothings about how good she was and how good she made him feel.

He had told her those things, of course, in great detail as he cleaned his seed from between her thighs and attempted to remove the stain on her nightgown and kissed her forehead. But he missed her so much now that he’d shared such intimacy with her, he hadn’t even bothered showering yet. He wanted to smell her on his skin.

He wondered if she would want to do it again, or if she really would want to wait until after marriage now that she’d had a small taste. Lars wasn’t sure he could wait very long before needing to chase those delicious sensations again, and he had a feeling Bianca would be ok with that.

Lars eventually fell asleep imagining what Bianca might taste like, and vaguely made the decision that tomorrow night, he would find out for himself.

#not s f w 💀#lars lindstrom #lars lindstrom smut #lars lindstrom fic #lars lindstrom x bianca #lars and the real girl fic #lars and the real girl #ryan gosling #ryan gosling fic #ryan gosling smut #ken-dom writes

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