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sublime-beyond-loss · 2 years

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Here’s a big ‘ol post of insane ramblings that gets into some stuff about the skip button ending and what it means to make meaning out of a game that insists it’s meaningless to play it

On today's Stanley Parable TED talk, Imma gonna propose the theory among the many I have that, despite appearances, the skip button ending functionally does not happen because its consequences are erased by the reset, like how the consequences of the other endings never really stick. Imma also going to talk about why that is a tragedy in itself.

In a sense, that by the narrator invalidating literally the entire point of the game, and himself, the skip button brings us to the end point of a game played out and with nothing left to say, before the reset hits and the status quo is restored. There's some ambiguity involved on if the narrator remembers the skip button in the same way there is ambiguity in what he remembers from the other endings, but he does remember the first visit to the memory zone at least. Considering that he didn't remember the review section the first time around though, his wonky memory maybe does mean he forgot the skip button anyway. When we return to the memory zone the second time, it's back to the way it was before its desertification, as if the skip button passage of time did not happen, and when we do return to the desert version of the memory zone for the epilogue, it's the figurine version of the shack with the staircase leading to one of the figurines now filled up with sand, as if the original version was either replaced or never existed. The epilogue states it takes place many, many years later, as if you had to get back to that end point in time that the skip button showed. That glimpse of the end now plays out in full. The narrator is gone in this version not due to skip button shenanigans, but because he said he was done after 'one last run of the office' and has indeed moved on.

In the end, I think the encounter with the settings person and the creation of TSP sequels is something of a commentary on the New Game Plus mechanic in many games. It makes me think of Dark Souls 3 where there are multiple endings where you can bring about the canonical end and/or rebirth of the Dark Souls universe, but even then, there is nowhere else for you to go as the player but back into the same game, as though it never ended, despite you bringing about an end to that universe. To you, the player, that end never really comes. The end is never the end as you boot the game up again to play it once more. The epilogue is an end point for TSP where everything is played out, there's no messages left to impart, and everyone has moved on except for one character who, like you, does not want to let the game go, and like any game, there's nowhere for the player to go but back into the same content.

Now, time to get into how none of this diminishes the horror and tragedy of the skip button ending, even if the epilogue is not actually a consequence of it like it might seem at first glance. First though, the game doesn't actually seem to be condemning you for going through with the skip button sequence like it might seem at first glance, considering the narrator's own vindictiveness toward you doing it. One, if it really wanted to be a condemnation of a player pushing forward at the expense of a character's suffering, waiting would actually have an affect on it. It would be quite the gut punch if it turned out that if you had just waited a bit, things could have turned out differently, but you just had to push on as fast as possible to get to the next bit of content, but since that isn't the case, I don't think that's what the game was actually going for.

Two, if the 'solution' to skip button ending is to simply restart from the pause menu and never push onward to experience the new content, that doesn't really work either. Restarting there puts the game in a state where the narrator is constantly begging you to go to the memory zone, and there is a tragic element to that, that you cannot prevent him from self-destructing aside from denying him what he wants, but you also lose out on most of the randomized elements of the game because the starting area is effectively gone until you complete the skip button ending. If it really was meant to be the solution, I don't think it would cut out all of the randomized office layouts and randomized narrator lines for the rest of your play time.

And beyond even that, by resetting the skip button ending while its happening, you are effectively being no better than the game itself with how the resets routinely destroy any character development the narrator goes through, good or bad, depending on what ending route you go down. You deny him a chance at self reflection and self actualization just as much as the forced resets do, but even by refusing to reset the skip button ending, the results are the same, because the game eventually does it for you. In the end, the skip button is messy, horrific experience for everyone involved with no solution.

And that's why the existential horror of TSP really comes out for the skip button ending. You could say it's a blessing if the narrator doesn't remember his time trapped in that room, but there's also something really awful about the idea that he went through some of the worst suffering a being can experience only to have all of that suffering invalidated as if it never happened in the first place. Only the person who can remember the skip button happening, Stanley/the player, can carry the proper response to the horror that played out and what the narrator went through, and yet that is still someone who can never truly comprehend what it was like to experience that. To have that whole ordeal erased, something he consciously experienced every second of as those eons passed by, the utter invalidation of it is as awful as him remembering it. And if he knew the entire time that a reset would hit at some point and he would forget everything, that every thought and feeling he'd have in that room was doomed to oblivion and meaningless in every sense of the word, while still knowing that he has an ungodly amount of time left to wait, it's amazing that the dude didn't go batshit insane much faster. Goddamn is the skip button scenario just a fucking abyss of existential terror lol.

Plus, people sleep on the sensory horror of that skip where the fire alarm is going off. My very first thought playing that for the first time was, 'oh god, how long has he been listening to that?' Once again, it is amazing he didn't go batshit insane faster. And consider the idea that the darkness that takes over once the lights go out was only left bright enough for gameplay sake. What if it really was meant to be genuine pitch blackness and he was left in a state of pure sensory deprivation for a very, very long time. The skip button sometimes gives off a bright glow in a few of the skips, so maybe it wasn't pitch blackness for him, but imagine that fucking yellow glow of the worst mistake of your life being the only thing you get to see for hundreds of years.

And if you take into account the theory that he's not actually trapped in the room and it's more of a matter of him not wanting to let go of Stanley and leave, until he finally does as the skips continue to lengthen, when put into the context of the reset erasing everything, it's even more tragic. Maybe while he was on his own he learned that he doesn't need an audience to exist, like he initially thought. Maybe he worked through some of his flaws and came out better for it. Maybe he learned how to create for himself for a change. If our glimpses into the outside world during the skips are a reflection of his mental state through all of it, it was probably a messy, painful experience, but there's still a memory zone at the end of it all, so he survived whatever trials were thrown at him, even if there isn't much left in the end. He would have had thousands and thousands of years to create anything and everything. Millions of new stories building on what he could have learned over the years, but none of it matters the second the reset hits. All of it and any development he went through is erased in an instant.

And maybe him making the choice to move on at the end of the figurine ending is him setting off on that same journey the skip button forced upon him, only under better circumstances. And maybe going through the epilogue and starting a new game is you resetting his chance at progress yet again, or maybe not, since the figurine ending remains the only ending you cannot replay even after a patch added ways to replay the other single-instance events within the game. Maybe there is nothing wrong in coming back to a game you enjoy and dwelling within it despite it being the same content loop stuck on repeat. And maybe the narrator, as a representation of a creator figure and all of the good and bad that comes with it, can still enjoy coming back to his creation and being the narrator for you, even if there is nothing new to discover. And maybe it suits him just fine not having the weight of needing to create new content for this game that he feels has run its course. Maybe there is no actual judgment involved when the game asks you to keep making sequels and let The Stanley Parable keep spiraling in upon itself, like any other game out there that you replay despite there being nothing new to gain from it, because TSP has always been a game where it is possible to find deeper meaning outside of what the surface level message may or may not be.

I think, in a way, TSP is an expression of exactly what I love about video games. In this world where everything is temporary and nothing stays the same, where even our memories are flawed recreations of previous events, most forms of media are the only thing you can experience over and over again exactly the same as it was the first time, and with video games in particular, you can get a new experience out of the same content in a way you cannot when re-watching a movie or TV show. People (even me sometimes) often get caught up in the idea that The End Is Never The End is an inherently bad thing, that the loop the game is stuck in is a bad thing, that the game denying you a conclusive ending is a bad thing, even though I've personally had way more fun deciding which existing ending is the most satisfying one to end my runs on. It used to be the zending, but ever since I figured out that you can pause the game during the freedom ending and exit out there, that's become my favorite place to leave it off. Who would even think to try pausing the game during a cutscene that just took control away from you in a game that usually doesn't? Much less use it as a point to exit out of the game? Emergent gameplay like that is satisfying, and the figurine ending gives you a place to chop things off with the narrator saying 'okay, I'm ready to move on', allowing you to decide the ending to stop playing on, or you just keep going instead, or you can hit up the epilogue and keep the sequels rolling. It is a way more satisfying and meaningful choice to give you a bunch of endings and let you decide which one is 'your' ending then to definitively say THE END and roll credits.

Just the fact that the game hints that there are loops of the game that you never see gets the imagination going and you essentially create your own version of those loops in your head by speculating about them. Hell, even the narrator has a thousand different interpretations through all of the fan content that's so different and varied and yet still very much him. And where one player might view him as a controlling, egotistical, vain creator that's fun to piss off and deserves every second of it, I myself view him as a messy, complicated, and often very relatable creator figure who is as likable as he is frustrating. If someone ran roughshod over a book I wrote, that I put my all into, if it existed within the interactive medium that is video games, I'd be just as pissed as him to see something I’m passionate about disregarded and destroyed by the reader. On the other hand, I wish the dude would relax a bit and not get so bent out of shape on some paths. Especially with the new version of the Playtest ending where he is written to be a bit less of a vindictive ass like in the original version. We were having a pretty good time playing those games and vibing right up until he gets hung up on his story as per usual and quite literally takes the ball and goes home.

But boy howdy is TSP a game that makes me feel like it welcomes letting me have my interpretations while also making me feel like An Idiot Who Completely Missed The Point. Of course, then I remember this is the same game that implies the character you're playing as is about to get very intimate with a bucket, so I think it's okay if I really am An Idiot Who Missed The Point lol. I always feel like I'm 12 steps behind the actual thought process that went into the less silly aspects of the game and that's probably part of the reason why I'm still dwelling upon it months later and keep coming up with big theory posts and weird art projects. The big irony is that my mind works in the exact opposite way these pieces of media do, in that they are willing to leave many aspects of themselves ambiguous and for the one taking it in to come to their own conclusions. I love to dive deep into any ideas, stories, and concepts I have and explain everything about them until there is not a single aspect left that's gone unexplained. I could never make a Stanley Parable or Shadow Of The Colossus, because I'd want to explain everything about the civilization that made those ruins that cover The Forbidden Lands.

It's very common for people to come away from TSP thinking its very pessimistic about people, video games, life itself, and maybe it is, and I enjoy it exactly because of the existential topics it delves into, especially now that I am able to appreciate them better than I could at the release of the original, but it's the exact same reasons why those existential themes resonate with me now that I also like viewing the game in a more hopeful light, despite everything. When everything is meaningless, when all of us and everything we create is doomed to be forgotten and lost to the void in the grand scheme of this universe, playing this game that tells you that playing it is meaningless puts it at very bottom of the meaninglessness totem pole. Where the struggle to make my own meaning within the meaninglessness of life often has me befuddled, it is so much easier to do so within a meaningless digital simulation, and so I take the less easy path and create positive meanings within the pessimism of this game, (Well, maybe not always, because I have probably a million different interpretations of what's going on in this game at this point and not all of them are happy fun times lol)

Perhaps this is a form of escapism from the bleakness of life, something that the game itself calls out, even if it's couched in the black comedy of the narrator still being stuck on the Steam reviews possibly hundreds of years into his solitary confinement, but hey, nothing's going to fix this inherent nightmare that is existence, so fuck it, we paraBALL. Within this tiny point on the grand timeline of the universe that I exist within for a few brief milliseconds, as I try to comprehend this piece of art that will one day disappear along with the human species, I see it claim that it is meaningless to play it. It almost spitefully contradicts itself to make itself impossible to pin down. It creates mysteries within mysteries and refuses to give you any answers. And I interact with it regardless, making my own meaning out of its contradictions. It kicks and screams and tells you it's pointless to play it and you can only win by turning it off while at the same time creating a horrific existential scenario where a key character in all of this is forced to confront the fact that he is fictional and can only exist while you perceive him, only for the game to go on insisting that you should really just turn it off and stop playing while this same character then says he is ready to move on to something else, despite needing your perception of him for him to go on existing as a fiction. But, hey, the fact that I like to imagine he does move on to better things perhaps means that within my perception of him, within my own interpretations of him, he does. Out of all these contradictions, I make my own meaning with my own contradictory theories. I embrace the paradoxical nature of the game and enjoy taking away different ideas from the different events that play out. Maybe I’ve won The Stanley Parable, or maybe I’ve lost it, or maybe I’m doing both at the same time, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

#the stanley parable #I spent waaay too long writing this out #I may be cringe but I am free #and this is even more evidence that TSP broke my autist brain in the best sort of way

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shinakazami1 · 1 year

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• previous ask anon here! I saw the positive response on my last ask so might as well say some more (imagine getting happy from being praised on your own praise, can't be me/j)

• you may feel like Dear Stanley doesn't get many reads but I assure you, if the fic was a youtube video I would put it on loop (they are so silly and the metaphors and the way he cared so much about those little details?? same fr)

• Tomato getting more content. oh no. my heart. you better prepare to pay for the damages that will be inflicted on my soul.

• I decided to tour your ao3 works and read Bad Luck! …I checked all the tags, no worries. (Love, Falling and All Things did came up first but it's in a series so I put it for later)

• 27k. That one hour of reading was quite something. It's so wrong but it's so good?? keyboard smashes I won't dive into details here, but the words hold so much feelings. They are so,,,a (Fanfic writers my beloved good job you two) Question: how are their lives after that. are they happy like really truly happy. it's an au but i need to know if my blorbos are ok.

• I'm probably going to read the soulmate bodyswap series next, and I'm really excited since 1. omg tooth-rotting fluffy gay men, I need this and 2. planetariums, aquariums and animal facts are my absolute favourites stop hitting my soft spots (once again thank goodness for fanfic writers amen)

• sorry if this is too long and possibly confusing! I'm not the best at writing anything out...maybe retreating to ao3 comment sections now that I know anonymous/no account commenting exists (because of you, I finally found out about it after all these years, thanks). Have a nice 365 days!

Anon please my gosh I just opened tumblr and I saw I had a message and just to hear my reaction for your comment meant a lot means a lot to me ofahioasi we are rn in a very silly loop and just please know I told my close buds about you writing these asks and just it means so much to me, and to see you wrote such a long comment (I checked, wow, 307 words, dude I appreciate you sm if you would ever want to reveal yourself be my guest IOHFSOIFSAO I just, I truly appreciate you)

Now lemme just respond to each point under the cut but PLEASE THIS IS NOT CONFUSING NOR TOO LONG THIS IS JUST SO PRECIOUS

Dude I am so glad you liked the metaphors!! I really wanted to make him project onto different things and just, Narrator feels like a man who would care so much about details that others wouldn't

If I ever get back to writing haha, but the prequel is gonna be a cute slowburn of how they got together (no angst tho haha noooo sir don't look how I mostly write angst hahahaah h a ) ; while sequel is their trip to the mountains which would have similar tone to the original!! But gosh thank you you really make me want to write it hehe

Bad Luck is one of my collabs with a user who left TSP community so now I am left as the only creator listen but they were the ones who came up with the idea for that and Good Luck Charm, which is the fic this one kinda comes from !! We were a bit scared if people would think we agree with Stanley's actions (esp since I was the one who wrote them fihfsoiafsih) but I am glad you like it! And well - we actually discussed it and haha no they are not good they are far from good in that au, what we intended to do was (SPOILER: DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW IF I EVER WRITE IT) that Stanley would confess to Narrator that he drugged him and Narrator would be very mad but since he got bitten and it was found out that he was omega, he would lose his job since the world is omegaphobic and Stanley would only later learn just of how much he fucked up. But since the damage is done and Leo would not want him to have easy way out, they kinda stay together and Stanley develops and anxiety disorder. They kinda make it all work and let themselves explore the feelings but Leo never forgives and good for him, good for that man

Gosh to hear you want to keep on reading my work???? That just means so much to me??? I wrote this one with Surf and the amount of silliness that series has just still makes me giddy with how I pulled some of my fav moments in my TSP fanfics so I hope you will not only have a nice read but if you do write, you will share your opinion if you will want to!!

You reminded me I have to check ao3 iohfashiosafois I haven't really been logging in so I prob been slacking off with responses but please, wherever you choose to write, it will always mean so much to me. You already spending time writing the first thing meant for me a ton, esp since this semester has been hard and I've been in art block overall but please anon, know that your words truly make me feel not only good but just grateful to you. Know that your words mean more than you can imagine and they can affect people in a good way. Thank you <3 Have lovely 365 days! (or 365/2 days, if you are a Kingdom Hearts fan)

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missmitchieg · 3 years

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Father's Day With The Molina Family

Julie woke up a couple of hours earlier than usual and got ready for the day as quietly as possible, pulling on a comfy sweater and lacing up her doodle sneakers. She sneaked out of the house and made a bee-line for the garage, pulling the doors open. "Morning, boys." She said with a smile.

Luke looked up from where he and Reggie were sat on the couch, quietly trying to figure out a melody for their latest new song and grinned, perking up. "Hey, Julie!"

"Hi, Julie!" Reggie smiled and gave a little wave, always happy to see his adopted sister and favorite lifer.

"Morning, Julie." Alex piped up from where he was sat in his chair, content to sit and listen to the music Luke and Reggie were making. "What's up?"

"Do you guys remember what day it is?" Julie asked.

"Uhhh, Sunday?" Luke tried after a few seconds of thinking, eyebrows furrowed and nose scrunched.

Julie snickered softly and pushed her hair off her shoulder. "It's Father's day."

"OH. Sweet!" Reggie nodded with a smile.

"Who wants to help me make breakfast in bed for dad?" Julie grinned as all three boys raised their hands and abandoned their seats, poofing into the kitchen. She shook her head and rolled her eyes fondly, leaving the garage to go back inside. As she walked inside, she was greeted with three ghost boys waiting for her in the kitchen.

Reggie was bouncing on his heels as he opened a pack of bacon, super excited to surprise Ray with some good food.

Luke was busying himself by grabbing ingredients to make pancakes.

Alex was grabbing an egg carton to make some scrambled eggs.

Julie chuckled as she washed her hands quickly and turned on the heat, dropping a few slices of bacon into the pan. She watched Alex wash his hands and crack a few eggs into the pan, handing him the spatula. She googled a recipe for pancakes and put her phone on the counter, pointing to things she couldn't reach for Luke or Alex to grab.

Julie started the coffee maker, having exactly how her father liked his coffee memorized after years of watching her mother make and pour Ray his cup of coffee every morning.

"Ok, instructions say whisk together one cup of flour, two tablespoons of sugar, two teaspoons of baking powder, and half a teaspoon of salt in a small bowl." Alex read aloud as he scrambled the eggs and seasoned them with salt and pepper. "Whisk together one cup of milk, two tablespoons of unsalted and melted butter, and one large egg in a medium bowl."

Luke nodded and grabbed the measuring spoons, tilting his head. "Teaspoon is the small one and tablespoon is the bigger one, right?" He asked just to be sure.

"Yeah, they're both engraved." Julie nodded. "The teaspoon says tsp and the tablespoon says tbsp."

"Oh, I see." Luke smiled and put the dry ingredients in the small bowl while Julie worked on measuring and pouring the wet ones, checking the next directions.

"What are you doing?"

Julie looked up when she heard Carlos, giving him a smile. "Breakfast for dad."

"Can I help?"

"You can grab strawberries and whipped cream." Julie offered.

Carlos nodded and did just that, stealing a strawberry for himself.

Julie chuckled, giving him an 'I saw nothing' look. "The boys said hi."

"Oh, hey." Carlos smiled, waving in the direction Julie pointed.

"Ok, now we gotta mix everything in the bigger bowl, but pour it slowly." Julie carefully poured the dry ingredients in with the wet while Carlos mixed it together.

"Luke, grab a paper towel and vegetable oil for me while I heat up the skillet."

Luke nodded and grabbed what Julie asked for, watching her oil up the skillet.

Julie poured the batter onto the skillet while Alex and Reggie flipped the bacon again.

When they looked bubbly enough, Luke surprisingly successfully flipped the nicely browned pancakes over.

Julie poured the coffee into Ray's favorite mug and poured in sugar.

The group finished cooking and decorated the food with strawberries, whipped cream and jam, sneaking upstairs to Ray's bedroom with a tray of food just as he was waking up.

"Morning, papa!"Julie smiled.

"Happy Father's Day!" The group of kids yelled cheerfully as Julie placed the tray into Ray's lap.

Ray perked up and rubbed his eyes as his half asleep brain registered the scene in front of him. He smiled as he sat up and shook his head at the food in his lap. He really did have the best kids in the world. "You kids made all of this?"

"Well, I grabbed whipped cream and strawberries and helped mix the pancake batter." Carlos shrugged with a smile.

"I love you kids."

"Love you, dad." Julie and Carlos said together and smiled, laughing when Carlos' stomach growled.

"Sounds like someone else needs some food in them." Julie joked with an eyeroll. "Come on. I'll pour your cereal." She told him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "Enjoy your breakfast, dad." She said before walking back downstairs to the kitchen, the boys poofing down immediately. "Hey, boys."

Carlos laughed and sat at the counter, watching Julie grab a bowl and spoon.

"Which one do you want today? We've got Cocoa Puffs, Cheerios, Lucky Charms, or Fruity Pebbles."

"Are they chocolate or regular Lucky Charms?"

"Regular."

"Cocoa Puffs." Carlos decided.

Julie nodded and poured the cereal in, Luke pouring the milk. "Thanks, Luke." She smiled as she placed the bowl of cereal in front of Carlos, watching Alex toast more bread. She chuckled as he buttered the bread and placed strawberries and blueberries on top, presenting the plate to her. "Thank you, Alex."

"Having a bunch of ghost friends is so cool."

"I promise you it never gets less cool." Julie assured him and but into her toast. "Hey, how's a park picnic sound to you guys?"

"I'm in!" Carlos nodded before shoving a spoonful into his mouth.

"Me, too!" Alex agreed.

"And me!" Luke grinned.

"Me, too!" Reggie raised a hand.

"Everyone's in."

The kids waited for Ray to finish eating and come downstairs and immediately ran to him, giving their best puppy dog eyes. "Dad, can we go to the park today?"

"Yeah, let's have a picnic!" Julie clasped her hands together, bouncing on her heels. "It'll be fun!"

Ray raised his eyebrows at the sudden ambush, but was touched at his kids' insistence to spend the day together. He smiled and nodded, hugging them both tightly.

The family threw out the trash and put the dirty dishes away to clean at the end of the day, spending a few hours in front of the TV. They marathoned the Star Wars movies together, the phantoms sitting on the floor in front of them.

Later, the family started to prepare some food for the picnic and left the house, heading to the park.

Julie smiled as she found a nice spot to put down the blanket, sitting down in her blue dress. She watched her father and little brother sit down, Ray on her left and Carlos on her right.

They spent three hours at the park, one eating and the next two running and playing.

Later, the family went to a bowling alley, Julie currently having the most strikes.

Julie grinned as she threw the ball and hit her twelfth strike, the ghosts cheering for her. She was getting a little better at not reacting to them in front of people who still thought they were holograms, so she just smiled as she won the game and shrugged, sipping from her water bottle.

"How are you this good at bowling?" Carlos asked, shaking his head.

"Lucky day, I guess." Julie said simply. "Wanna play again?"

Carlos nodded, and the family ended up playing two more times, Carlos winning the second and Ray winning the last.

Eventually, they all decided they were exhausted and it was time to leave, so they went home and ate a quick lasagna dinner before the family crashed on the couch together.

"Woo! Best. Day. Ever!" Julie decided, leaning her head against Ray's shoulder.

"Agreed." Ray nodded.

"Definitely. We should do that every Father's Day."

"I'm down." Julie told them.

"Have I mentioned I love you?"

"Yes, papa." Julie chuckled. "We love you, too."

"Love you, dad."

Luke, Alex and Reggie smiled and high fived as he watched them, Julie discreetly smiling back at her boys.

Yep, this was definitely the best day ever.

#julie and the phantoms #julie molina #carlos molina #luke patterson #reggie molina #alex molina #ray molina #jatp fanfic

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chocolatequeennk · 3 years

Text

Forever Timeless, 4/23

Summary: Two months after the Dalek Crucible, the Doctor and Rose are getting used to having the biggest family on Earth. As they visit Leadworth in 1996, Victorian England, a mysterious desert planet, and Elizabethan England, those family and friends often help in unexpected ways. But no matter where they go or who they’re with, it’s always the Doctor in the TARDIS with RoseTyler–just as it should be.

Ten x Rose, Donna x Lee

Betaed by @saecookie, @rudennotgingr, @pellaaearien, and @jabber-who-key

Tagging @doctorroseprompts for Doctor/Rose content

Part 7 of Being to Timelessness

AO3 | FF.NET | TSP

Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Ch 3

Chapter Four: At Last

The Doctor looked at Lee as the TARDIS spun slowly in the Vortex. “I’ve got the coordinates all set. Are you ready to see Donna again?”

Lee nodded. “Please.”

The Doctor flipped the lever, and the time rotor moved up and down with its typical grinding, wheezing sound. Lee shook his head, amazement etched across his features. He studied the TARDIS like someone who’d heard about them all his life and couldn’t believe he was finally seeing one.

“Just n-never thought I would be inside a TARDIS,” he explained when Rose looked at him questioningly.

Rose reached out and patted the central column. “Put on a good show for him, dear.”

The TARDIS lights flashed, and they spun through time and space at a dizzying speed. The ship landed hard enough to send them all to the grating. Everyone laughed, no one harder than Lee.

The Doctor jumped up and brushed himself off. “Let’s go see what Donna and Jenny are up to,” he said, jogging up the ramp.

Rose’s phone chimed, and the Doctor had a sinking feeling he knew what the incoming message said. He waited for Rose to read it, and her sigh confirmed his fears.

“Oi, Sunshine. When we said a week, we meant an Earth week, as in seven days. You’re late.”

“Oh… this is bad.” The Doctor ran his hand through his hair. He could already feel the bleach burning his scalp.

“What’s wrong?” Lee asked.

“We landed a day later than we promised to meet Jenny and Donna,” Rose said as she typed out the text and hit send. She looked up in time to see Lee smile and shake his head. “What?”

“Just imaging Donna’s reaction.”

oOoOo

Donna was in the middle of telling Jenny exactly what she planned to say to the Doctor when her phone chimed with a text notification.

“Oh, that better be them,” she muttered as she fished it out of her purse.

Sorry we’re late, Rose said. We brought something for you.

Donna snorted. “If they think some little rinky-dink souvenir is going to make me forget they actually did strand us, they need to think again.” She picked up her bag and tossed a note on the table to cover the bill. “Come on, Jenny.”

They could see the TARDIS from the edge of the park, and Donna unconsciously picked up her pace. At the moment, she couldn’t tell if she were more eager to be home, or to give the Doctor a piece of her mind. Either way, she was glad to see the TARDIS.

When they were about ten feet away, the Doctor stuck his head out of the TARDIS. “Are you coming?” he asked.

Donna stopped and put her hand on her hip. “Oi, don’t get shirty with me, Spaceman,” she told him. “What did I tell you about not leaving us stranded in Barcelona? You’re just lucky the hotel had a vacancy so we could keep our room for another night—and lucky Jenny was positive you would only be a day or two late.”

An amused chuckle cut off Donna’s tirade, and she whirled around to tell the innocent bystander exactly where he could put his busybody nose.

But the sight of a familiar face drew her up short. “Lee!” she gasped. Then she put her hands over her mouth, for once in her life completely speechless.

“Hello, D- D- Donna.”

The stuttering broke through her shock, and she ran to him, reaching out to touch his face, his hair, anything just to convince herself he was really there.

Her hands finally settled on his shoulders, and she clung to him just as she had in their last moments together in the Library. “Oh God, oh God. Is this real?”

“You’re real,” Lee said, holding her just as desperately. “I hoped you were real.”

“I found you. I promised I’d find you, and I did. I found you.”

Donna pulled back and cupped his face between her hands. “But… how? And where?”

“I got t- t- trapped,” he explained. “Between worlds.”

“When we activated the transmat at the Library, the Reality Bomb was in full effect,” the Doctor explained.

Donna tore her gaze away from Lee to pay attention to his explanation.

“And Lee’s transmat beam, unfortunately, got caught in the Void—the space between the universes. He was literally stuck in a crack between worlds. Somehow, the crack opened up in the bedroom of a little girl in 1996, which was where we found Lee.”

A shiver ran down Donna’s spine. “I thought you said all of that was repairing itself. Closing back up like it had never happened.”

The Doctor tugged on his ear. “Strictly speaking, it didn’t happen. Not in this timeline. Mickey and Pete and Jackie were only able to hop through because Pete’s World ran ahead of ours, and things hadn’t yet—”

“I asked about Lee, not the whole bloody universe.”

He cleared his throat. “Right. Sorry. Welllll… the crack was closing when we found Lee. But he’s here now!” he said quickly, before she could react.

Donna pulled Lee into a hug. “I can’t believe I came so close to losing you,” she whispered. His hand stroked her hair, and she had to swallow back tears. “I spent so long looking for you…”

Rose caught Jenny’s eye and gestured towards the park. Taking the Doctor’s hand, she pulled him towards the trees, trusting their daughter to follow.

oOoOo

Lee closed his eyes and rested his head on top of Donna’s. Her whispered confession eased one concern he’d had—that what they’d had in the Library had all been a lie.

Up until then, he’d felt a bit like he was on a first date, sweaty palms and all. But now… “I was sent to the Library to find out what happened. Instead I found you.”

Donna stepped back half a step and looked up at him. “What do you mean, you were sent?”

He lowered his voice and leaned in. “I’m a Time Agent,” he told her quietly.

“You mean Rose was right?” Donna exclaimed.

Lee chuckled. “Yes, she was.” He frowned. “I apparently spent 100 years in the Library’s mainframe, and I still don’t know what happened.”

Donna smiled and took his hand. “Well I can answer that,” she said. “Come on, let’s go for a walk.”

“We were supposed to have a quiet day in,” Donna started. “I was painting my toes, Jenny was reading, and Rose was painting. Then the Doctor came in and told us to get ready to go…”

Lee listened raptly to the tale, from the message on the psychic paper to the surprise strangers arriving in the Library to the lights suddenly going out.

He sucked in a breath when Donna repeated the Doctor’s warning. “Count the shadows.”

“Vashta Nerada,” he breathed.

Donna rolled her eyes. “Of course you’ve heard of them.” She sighed. “Am I always going to be the only one who doesn’t know things?”

Lee blinked at her. This insecurity… It hadn’t been there in the Library. But maybe the program of the computer had given her the confidence she apparently lacked. It had certainly made other changes, like making his stutter even worse than it was in reality.

Donna took a breath and continued the story. “So, one of the crew was taken. Eaten, I guess. And as soon as the Doctor knew how big of a threat it was, he wanted to send me and Jenny back to the TARDIS to be safe. He dragged us into the little shop, with the transmat pad by the door.”

Lee nodded. That was when their story began, then.

oOoOo

The Doctor wrapped his arm around Rose’s shoulder as they walked the paths in the park. They’d taken off in the opposite direction of Donna and Lee, with Jenny walking beside them, telling them all about their week long holiday.

The Doctor held Rose close as he thought about the other couple and wondered how things were going for them. He remembered how devastated Donna had been when she’d gotten back from the pocket universe in the Library computer. She’d had the life she’d always wanted, but it had been fake.

Hopefully Lee can make it real this time, Rose said, following his train of thought.

He hummed in agreement. I hope so. I just… He took a moment to soak in everything they had—each other, their bond, their daughter walking with them. Donna deserves all of this, too.

Rose stretched up and kissed him on the cheek. “You’re very sweet sometimes,” she whispered.

Her phone beeped before he could reply. Rose checked the text, but all three of them had turned back towards the TARDIS as soon as they heard the chime, guessing what the message was.

oOoOo

Rose smiled when she caught sight of the couple. They were sitting across from each other at a picnic table, holding hands.

It looks like Donna’s worries that the real Lee might not care about her didn’t come true.

The Doctor hummed. Yep. Oh, I’m glad.

Donna saw them first and she jumped up. “About time you got back here,” she snarked. “Although I shouldn’t be surprised you’re late… don’t think I’ve forgotten you were a whole day late getting here.” She gestured at the Doctor’s head. “Nice platinum blonde, I think.”

“But… you…” The Doctor gestured vaguely between Donna and Lee. “I had a good reason for being late! And aren’t you glad the TARDIS took us to Leadworth to find him?”

Donna’s teasing expression faded to happiness. “Yeah. All right, you’re off the hook this time, Spaceman. But next time…” She raised an eyebrow meaningfully.

“So, are we ready to go back to Cardiff?” Jenny asked. “I bet Gran is wondering where we are.”

Rose rolled her eyes. “Mum will find something to mutter about, no matter when we arrive. But, as long as we don’t need to make any stops first…”

She looked at Donna and Lee. “You’re certainly welcome to come with us, Lee. We have a few friends who might be very interested to meet you, actually. I understand if you aren’t up for meeting a whole group of new people today, though. We could drop you and Donna off somewhere and come back after the party, if you’d rather.”

Lee shook his head. “I’ll come with you.”

“Excellent!” The Doctor, still worried about his hair, darted to the TARDIS and unlocked the door. “Come on them, what are we waiting for?”

“I was going to say that your mother-in-law’s anger at you missing the party would be punishment enough, but you’ll just natter on about how this is a time machine.” Donna pursed her lips. “And you’ll be able to get us back in time without her even knowing we were almost late. It’s almost not fair.”

“Jackie’s stubborn refusal to grasp the basics of time travel can be frustrating, but it does have its advantages,” the Doctor agreed.

oOoOo

The Doctor watched his little entourage as he and Rose flew the TARDIS back to Cardiff. Donna was watching Lee like she thought he was going to disappear again, and he had her hand clasped firmly in his own.

Jenny sat on the jump seat, watching the two of them. The Doctor tilted his head and studied his daughter. There was something… off in the way she was holding herself.

Let’s take Jenny for a trip on her own as soon as we can, he suggested to Rose.

Rose turned slightly to watch Jenny for a moment, and then she nodded.

Their landing was soft, and Rose led the way to the top of the ramp. “Time to visit family,” she told everyone. “Lee… I know you agreed to come, but please don’t feel like you need to spend time with my mum. I love her, but she can be… a lot.”

Lee smiled reassuringly. “I’m pretty sure I’ve met people more difficult than your mum, Rose.”

“I wouldn’t bet on it,” the Doctor muttered under his breath.

Rose glared at him, and he smiled unrepentantly back. They both knew that the faux antagonistic vibe between him and Jackie was all for show… Well, mostly.

“All right,” he said, gesturing for them all to leave the ship. “If we don’t get out there now, she’ll be banging on the door wondering why we’re staying in this box.”

Rose opened the door and started laughing when she saw her mum halfway to them.

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Jackie said. “I don’t know why you’d want to stay in that box when the party is inside.”

Rose stepped outside and moved aside so everyone else could exit the TARDIS. Jackie’s eyes lit on Lee, and Rose nodded. “Donna brought a plus one, if that’s okay.”

Jackie smiled. “Of course! Now come on, the party is nearly started.” She turned and led the way back to the front door.

A car pulled into the drive as they were walking inside, and Rose raised her eyebrows when she realised that Martha and Mickey had arrived together. The Doctor had told her about the timelines he had noticed, but she hadn’t really given it much thought.

The two groups met at the front door and entered the house together. “It’s about time you all got here,” Jack called from the living room. “I was starting…”

His voice trailed off when he caught sight of Lee. “Well hello,” he said. “Jack Harkness, and you are…”

“Not interested,” Donna said firmly. “This is Lee. Lee McAvoy. We met at the Library.”

Rose covered her mouth with her hand to hide her smile at Donna’s clever wording, but to her surprise, Jack’s gaze sharpened.

“Lee McAvoy? At the Library?” he said, emphasising the article.

Donna looked back and forth between the two men. “Oh right,” she said after a minute. “Jack used to be a Time Agent, too.”

“Yeah, and I remember hearing about an agent who was lost in the whole quarantine of the Library.” He looked at the Doctor. “You know, I actually wondered about Lee here when you told us you’d been to the Library. But I assumed if you didn’t mention him that you hadn’t met.”

He looked at Donna, then at her hand clasped in Lee’s. “I guess I was asking the wrong person,” he said, waggling his eyebrows.

“Jaaaaack,” the Doctor said, exasperated.

“You know, I’ve heard of Jack Harkness, too,” Lee interjected.

Jack leaned forward. “Oh yeah? The tales of my greatness go before me?”

Lee shook his head soberly, bur Rose noticed a glimmer in his eyes. “N-no. The tales of your…” He opened and closed his mouth a few times. “Of your nakedness.”

The whole group burst into laughter. “He’s got you there, Captain Cheesecake,” Mickey said, pounding the man on the back.

“Why are you naked in all the stories, Mr. Jack?” a very young voice asked.

Rose bit her lip and looked down at her little brother, who had snuck into the room when no one had noticed. Oh dear, she thought, looking at the unamused expression on her mum’s face.

“Oh really?” Jackie said as she picked up Tony. “What kind of stories have you been telling my little boy, Harkness?”

She ignored Jack’s incoherent sputtering and wheeled on Pete. “And you, Mister. We’ll be talking about you taking Tony with you to work.” She swept out of the room, and everyone let out collective breath.

“I see what you mean, Rose,” Lee offered, and the tension broke into laughter.

Jenny slipped away from the group, making her way to the kitchen. Pete was pulling dishes out of the cupboards. “Can I help set the table?” she said, guessing what he was up to.

“Of course.”

They each picked up a stack of dishes and carried them into the dining room. As they laid plates around the table, Jenny felt her granddad watching her.

“Jackie tells me Donna brought a plus one tonight,” he said after a few minutes.

Jenny’s hand clenched around the knives she held. “Yeah. Lee McAvoy. They were married in a parallel universe, and we’ve been trying to find him.”

Pete nodded; he understood different universes and different lives better than anyone. “I’m glad Donna was able to find him. She’s seemed a little sad this summer.”

Jenny sighed. Donna had been sad, which made her own upset that much more selfish. “Yeah,” she said quietly.

They finished setting the table, and then Jenny followed Pete back into the kitchen. “Of course,” he said, “Lee joining your group changes the dynamics a bit, doesn’t it?”

Jenny bit her lip, then let everything she was feeling spill out. “Yeah. Mum and Dad, and Donna and Lee. And then me. Just Jenny. I’m the fifth wheel.”

She dropped onto a bench and slouched. “I don’t fit anymore.”

Pete held out a hand and pulled her to her feet. “Then you have to find a way to make yourself fit,” he said firmly. “Come on; dinner is just about ready.”

oOoOo

After supper had been cleared from the table, the Doctor clapped his hands. “All right everyone, may I have your attention!”

“Oh, we’d better listen to him, or he’ll find a way to blow up the dining room or something,” Jackie said sardonically. Everyone else laughed.

The Doctor rolled his eyes. “If you’re done taking the mick—”

“Never,” Mickey said.

“Then maybe,” he continued, raising his voice a little, “you’d like to hear my new safety resolution.”

“Oh, for—” Jackie took a large gulp of her wine. “I’m going to regret this, but let’s hear it.”

“Thank you, Jackie.” Finally, everyone quieted and gave him their full attention. “All of you have travelled with us at one time or another, and most of you have had the… let’s say the misfortune of being stranded.”

Mickey nodded. “On a spaceship in eighteenth century France.”

“Quite right, Mickey Smith. And now, we’re all going our separate ways, to a certain extent. Some of us are in Cardiff,” he gestured at Pete and Jack, “Some in London,” Mickey and Martha, “And some of you might not even live in this time.” This to Lee. “And since we all seem to find trouble more easily than most, I’d like to offer… let’s call it a safety button.”

“What are you thinking, Doctor?” Martha asked. “Project Indigo was completely dismantled by UNIT when the Earth was put back where it belonged.”

Jack held up the wrist that had his vortex manipulator. “I’ve got my own safety button.”

Lee reached into his back pocket and pulled out an identical device. “Me t-t-too.”

“Where did you get that?” Donna exclaimed.

Lee pointed at himself. “T-t-t…” He paused and took a breath. “Time Agent,” he said, forcing the words out.

The Doctor interrupted before Donna insisted on a full history of where he’d been hiding his Vortex Manipulator this whole time. “Excellent, the two of you are covered then. But for the rest of you, what I’m about to suggest is the next best thing.”

The soft murmur of conversation around the table stopped and everyone looked at him. The Doctor nodded and launched into his explanation.

“The TARDIS and I have been working on a little project.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out ten thin pieces of wire. “These are homing beacons. I’ll just install these in your mobile phones under the battery. If you’re ever in trouble and need us to come get you, just press and hold 9 and it’ll activate the beacon.”

“I hate to admit it,” Jackie said, “but that’s actually a good idea.”

Everyone around the table nodded and pulled their phones out. The Doctor rolled his eyes at Jackie, but went to work on installing the homing beacons onto all of the phones, working down the line.

The last phone on the table was a plastic toy mobile. He looked down at his young brother-in-law, staring up at him with all the seriousness a three-year-old could muster. “I wanna be able to call you too, Doctor.”

The Doctor ruffled the boy’s hair. “Absolutely, Tony Tyler.” He picked up the toy and pointed the sonic screwdriver at it, letting the sound fill the room for a few seconds before he stopped. Then he handed the toy back to Tony.

“There you go. One Tony Tyler homing beacon, ready to go.”

The nanny, who had been waiting at the doorway, came in and held her hand out. “Come on, Tony, you got to talk to the Doctor like you wanted. It’s time for your bath now.”

“Night, Doctor! Night Rosie!”

“Oh, I don’t warrant a good night,” Jackie said, but the Doctor was fairly certain she sounded less irritated than usual.

Sally, the housekeeper, brought out coffee and tea and placed them on the sidebar. Jackie smiled and thanked her, then looked at the group.

“As long as we’re all making announcements, I’ve got one of my own. You’re all invited to our place for Christmas. We’ve got plenty of room for all of you, if we pull out the couches.”

Mickey and Martha both started shaking their heads. “We can’t get that long off,” Mickey said. “We’ll be doing good to get out here for dinner and back to London before we’re expected to be at work the next day.”

“Oh, come on,” Jackie wheedled. “It won’t be the same without you.”

The Doctor got an idea, and after gaining Rose’s approval, he spoke up. “There is a way we could have a holiday house party and still get everyone to work on time the next day.”

“How’s that, boss?”

Martha got it immediately, though. “If we leave the current timeline for the week, right Doctor?”

He nodded. “We could take everyone off-world for a holiday trip. Pick you all up on the 23rd, say, and then bring you back the next morning. Not only do you get a few days’ holiday, you’ll still have Christmas Day at home to catch up on laundry or whatever.”

“I’m not spending our first Christmas together in a hotel on some strange alien planet,” Jackie protested.

“But we could rent a house,” Rose told her. “You could do all the grocery shopping and bring everything with you, and then you’d still get to host the party just like you wanted.”

Jackie pursed her lips. “You’ll help him find a house?” she pressed.

The Doctor rolled his eyes, but he kept his mouth shut.

“Yeah, I’ll help him.”

Jackie looked around at everyone. “Are you all okay with this?”

Mickey nodded. “It’ll be nice to get away for more than a day,” he said. “UNIT has been working us hard for the last few months, trying to clean up the mess left by the Daleks.”

“All right then,” Jackie conceded. “We’ll go away for the holiday.” She pointed at the Doctor. “But we better not end up on the planet Zhoz.”

“I’ll have you know—”

Jackie waved him off. “Come on, everyone. Get yourself a cuppa and let’s go sit down in the living room.”

oOoOo

Rose took her cuppa and went to an over-stuffed armchair tucked slightly away from the rest of the seating arrangement. She tucked her legs up underneath herself and watched her family.

Jack and Lee were swapping stories from the Time Agency. Donna was sitting pressed against Lee’s side, and every once in a while she’d interject with a story of her own from traveling on the TARDIS. Rose loved to see her newfound confidence—a year ago, she wouldn’t have felt like she had anything to add to a conversation like that.

A naked streak interrupted her observations. Rose jumped up when she realised the streak was her little brother, dripping wet from his bath. He shrieked with laughter as he darted through the living room.

“Oh, Lord,” Jackie muttered.

“I’ve got him, Mum,” Rose told her as she took chase.

It wasn’t hard to track the little boy. If the puddles of water hadn’t given him away, the constant giggling would have. She caught up with him just before he opened the back door to run out into the garden.

“Oh no you don’t, mister,” she said, scooping him up. “Come on, time to go to bed.”

She waved at Pete and Jenny, who were trying not to laugh. “And apologise to Dad for interrupting him and Jenny,” she instructed.

“Sorry, Daddy!” Tony shouted.

“You’re forgiven, Tiger.” Pete stood up and kissed Tony on the forehead. “Now be nice to Anna. She’s getting her exercise in today.”

The winded nanny smiled tiredly. “Thank you, Mr. Tyler.” She took Tony from Rose. “Come on, young man. It’s bed time for all streaking toddlers.”

“What’s streaking?” Tony asked as they left the room.

As soon as he was out of earshot, Rose, Pete, and Jenny burst out laughing.

When Rose reentered the living room, Jack was leaning back on the couch, a gleeful smirk on his face. “And now I’m not the only one with a naked story.”

#ficandchips #ten x rose #dwfic #fic by Nancy #doctorroseprompts #donna x lee #the reunion we've all been waiting for!#plus lots of hijinks at the Tyler party #Tony Tyler is a ham and steals the show every time

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belphegorswhore · 4 years

Note

Wowie, that message at the bottom of your last post was strangely aggressive. Okay, here’s an ask for your inbox: the brothers (and the other guys if you want to) react to a dumb MC. Like, someone who’s very pretty and cute, but you could swear that their looks are the only thing they have going for them. Their bad at school, ask dumb questions and are a total air head. Mega bimbo/himbo energy

See, now this is the content we want ;)

Obey Me! Characters react to himbo/bimbo/thembo MC

Lucifer:

Listen, we all know idiots are his type, I mean... he likes Diavolo... the #1 himbo

He’d have to sit and sigh anytime you say anything dumb, and he’d be like

“Why do I like them...?”

I think what really gets him is your clueless smile, I dunno I get vibes

It’s very charming to him, but he’s very upset that your failing school

Low-key ruining his reputation, he would not hold hands with you in public

It’s ok, he still loves you..

He would totally show you off at a dance because of your looks, but he would not allow you to talk

“You’re going to shake their hand and that’s it, do not speak”

Unlike the rest of his brothers, he wouldn’t trick you into doing dumb shit

Mammon:

“Damn, I guess I’ll have to take care of you”

He’d like to think that he’s the smarter and stronger one, so he has to take care of you

But he’s actually equally as stupid, so you guys would get in trouble a lot

“Hey, MC, you wanna ditch class?”

“Not really”

“But what if I said... you do it anyways..”

“Ok”

Would absolutely trick you into doing dumb stuff

But because of this, he’d make you take the blame if he did anything wrong

It’s not like anyone would believe him, but still

Oh, and what’s that...? Modeling???

Obviously you’d model with him now, he’d have a heart attack looking at you in some outfits though

Leviathan:

Oh no

“M-MC... you must hate looking at a-an otaku like me... I’m so disgusting...”

“What’s that mean..? Is that like the Naruti thing??”

“Wh- No!”

“Isn’t that like 12 episodes long, with Chris Evans or something”

“Stop!”

He was worried that you’d think he’s dumb, but now he’s getting a headache listening to you

You’d be easily impressed by his gameplay

“Wow, Levi, you’re so good at this game!”

“I-I’m playing a dating si- Actually, that would be correct I’m amazing at this game”

He would absolutely convince you to do Ruri-Chan cosplay

He’d regret it after because he’d have a stroke

Satan:

He’d think it’s very cute, but he’d constantly worry about you

He’s mostly worried about other people flirting with you at school

If he saw people flirting with you, he’d probably wall slam you in front of them and they’d go away

Like, that mans one of the seven lords or smth, they’re worried for their life

“See what happens when you stand there like a space cadet *sigh* at least be more alert when you’re by yourself or it’s gonna be your own damn fault when you get kidnapped”

“You’re right!”

“I said when you’re alone... you don’t have to worry about it when you’re with me, you can space out as much as you want”

“R-Right!”

“And I didn’t mean anything funny by that either! S-So don’t get the wrong idea!”

Did so just quote Fruits Basket? Yeah, but diD I ASK???

He’d feel bad about it, but he would totally get you to meow

He was joking at first, but now he does it all the time

He also gets you to help him prank Lucifer

Asmodeus:

At first he’d think your so pransome and that he’d have to work so hard to get you, then he’d find out you’re low key stupid and he’d be like

“This is gonna be so easy... but at what cost”

He’d truly try his best not to take advantage of you, so he’d just dress you up and do your make up a lot

Would definitely put you in sexy nice outfits and take pictures, but he’d keep them for himself

He’d also like to try a lot of his products on you, but still trick you

“MC, did you know this moisturizer is made from pure angel tears?”

“Whoa, no wonder my skin is so clear..- Wait, that’s so sad, are they okay!?”

He’d also lie to you about other stuff, just to see how you’d react

He’d literally tell you that Lucifer dyed his hair and that it used to be white, so the next time you interact with Lucifer it’d be like:

“Lucifer, I know you’re secret..”

“*glares* Which one..!?”

“*on the verge of crying* Wh-White hair.....!”

Lucifer would sigh and have to tell Asmo to stop tricking you

Beelzebub:

Oh no... 2 dumbasses

He didn’t even notice you were dumb, and he’s too shy to comment about your looks

He’d probably think you’re smart

“MC, what’s the answer to this question..?”

“The square root... of 68... Um... probably a carrot, that’s a root I think”

“Yeah, I like carrots so it’s probably right”

Mammon would definitely be mad that Beel calls him dumb but you smart

“Wow MC, you’re pretty and smart...”

You guys being together would be like the attractive one and the jock, iconic

But, or course, neither of you realize this

If you guys were cooking together and Beel ate the food it would go like:

“MC... where’d the food go?”

“...I don’t know, it was here a second ago”

Or like:

“It says ‘tsp’ of baking soda... what do you think that is, Beel?”

“I forgot... let’s just add a cup”

“Yeah, that’s probably safe”

You two would make Luke cry

Belphegor:

Honestly gave it his all at first, but now he’s tired

“MC... you wanna sleep together?”

“Oh, like a pillow fort!? I’ve always wanted to have a pillow fort with you, this is great!”

“Wh- No- Sure, yeah”

He’d be really happy when you wear his clothes though, especially his sweaters

And, just like Satan, he’d get you to prank Lucifer with him

“Ok, so you’re going to talk to him while I put a whoopie cushion on his chair, he’s dumb so he’ll fall for it”

And when your distracting Lucifer you’d end up saying something like

“Lucifer, are you dumb?”

“Wh- No.”

“Okay, I thought you were dumb”

And before you could finish the prank, Lucifer would storm out he room because you thought he was dumb

Belphegor would be disappointed and you’d be confused

“What did I do wrong..?”

“Nothing, you did great. In the end Lucifer got mad and that was the goal”

While he does think you’re attractive, this asshole would love tricking you for his enjoyment

Diavolo:

The #1 himbo

Everyone else would be like ‘Wow, this human is so beautiful and they got with the prince of Devildom! That’s amazing!”

But really he was nice to you once and you were like ‘wow... him’

“MC... you are very... delightful... to view”

“He’s so good with his words <3”

He does think youre attractive though, and just like Lucifer, he’d want to show you off (but in a more fun way)

He’d literally carry you to class, both to show you off and probably because you want to be carried

You could be in the middle of a meeting and sitting on his lap and he wouldn’t mind

Everyone else would though

Since you’re bad at school he would try to help you, but it’s very difficult

“Okay, so this war happened 4000 years ago-“

“When?”

“...4000 years ago”

Solomon:

Y’all thought Asmo was flirting too much?? Nah, he stopped after he got what he wanted, Solomon would keep going

“Wow you’re dumb, I like that in a person”

“I’m not dumb...”

“But, it’s in a cute way”

“Wow, he called me cute”

Once he gets closer to you... he messes with you even more

“Hey MC, there’s a stain on your shirt”

“Really, where- *gets flicked*”

This asshole would not stop messing with you

He’d even mess with you just to mess with the brothers

(In front of any of the brothers) “Hey, MC, I dropped that, can you pick it up for me?”

“I just saw you drop-“

“It slipped out of my hand..”

“Oh ok.”

“*whispers* haha.. nice ass”

Simeon:

He thinks it’s cute, even if you’re failing everything

“It’s fine.. it’s cute :)”

But you guys are also both dumb, and technologically challenged

Texting each other would go like:

“Wha TSS jup”

“Nowtwhisng”

“Met oo :))”

He would probably compliment you a lot, doesn’t matter if you can’t handle it, he’ll keep going

“You’re so pretty and cute, has anyone ever told you that?”

“Yeah, you said that earlier today”

“I can’t even look at you because you’re so bright ;)”

“I’m, like, normal light though...”

“*sighs* it’s okay, it’s cute”

If anyone else called you dumb though... I dunno... might just... glare at them

He wouldn’t fight anyone though, he’s a man of GOD unless...

Barbatos:

He likes it, but he hates it. It’s cute sometimes, but he gets a headache other times

“If... theoretically, I jumped off the roof-“

“Please don’t.”

“No no, theoretically, you could time travel into the past and catch me...”

“Actually, it would have to be the future, and I wouldn’t do that. Please don’t :)”

He’d also help you with school, but sometimes he’d be tired of you not understanding and would do the homework for you

He thought it was a lot of work to handle Diavolo, but you surpassed his expectations

You’re lucky he likes you, I guess...

“Barbatos... why are you staring at me like that..?”

“No reason”

“...Do I look weird, is there something on my face??”

“No, you look nice today”

“Wow, you’re such a great friend :)”

“.... :)”

It’s okay, he thinks your stupidity is barely charming

Luke:

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you from these horrible demons!!”

He would worry a lot about your safety because he’d think you’re too dumb to realize when someone’s after you

“Didn’t you realize he was flirting with you!? Disgusting!”

“But he was being nice to me”

“That’s what demons do to get what they want”

“What do they want?”

“Uh.. um... I don’t know- But I’m sure it’s bad!”

Simeon would try to reassure Luke, but it wouldn’t work

“Luke, it’s fine. They’re all just complimenting them because they’re really pretty-“

“No, you too!? Simeon, I thought I could trust you!!”

One day if he’s trying to defend you, he’d probably end up threatening Lucifer

“....pardon?”

“I-I said I’ll fight you if you k-keep doing that...!”

And then Lucifer would scare him with no hesitation because he feels no remorse for him

I added everyone cuz no one but God can stop me. this took way too long, I’m sorry

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duhragonball · 3 years

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‘21

Amidst all the popular hype for seeing the end of 2020, it didn’t hit me until about lunchtime what the real highlight is that I’ve been waiting for: For the first time since 1999, the year finally ends in “numberty-number” again. It low-key irritated me that we had to call it “two thousand three” and I was relieved when “twenty-thirteen” caught on, but it still wasn’t right because it was too short, and now we’re back in the sweet spot, and I should be safely dead by 2100, so that’s one less thing I gotta deal with.

Really, even “numberty hundred” rings true to me. “Nineteen hundred” sounds like a year. “Twenty-one-oh-six” sounds like a futur-y year, which is even cooler. So did “Two thousand five”, until I was actually living in it, and it sounds even worse now that it was a long time ago and adults will talk about their childhood happening in that year. Daniel Witwicky would be old enough to get married and grow a fancier beard than me. That’s nuts. My point is that, honestly, it’s the year 3000-3019 that I have to worry about, so if I ever decide to go vampire, those will be the years I hide in the ocean or force society to reset the calendar, whichever’s easier.

I spent New Year’s Eve finishing Superliminal, which I bought on Steam after I watched Vegeta play it on YouTube. It has a similar look and feel to the Stanley Parable, so if you liked one you’d probably enjoy the other, although Superliminal has a different theme. I kept hoping I’d find some secret passage that I wasn’t supposed to take, and a narrator would scold me for finding the “Chickenbutt Ending”, but it doesn’t work that way. Superliminal’s all about puzzles and awesome visuals, but it does have the same soothing design aesthetics as TSP. Honestly, I enjoyed just wandering around in Stanley’s office, and Superliminal does the same thing with a hotel and several other settings. It’s nice.

This got me thinking about how I kind of did everything there was to do in The Stanley Parable, and I sort of wished they would add new stuff to the game, but I’m not sure there would be much point to that. I could play the older version, but it presents the same message, just with different assets. The Boss’s Office would look different, but it’d be the same game. And this got me thinking about various “secret chapters” in pop culture. Secrets behind the cut.

I first heard about this idea in the 2000′s, when fans invented this notion that there was a secret chapter of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. I read a website that tried to explain the concept, and of course it lauded J.K. Rowling with all this gushing praise for working an Easter egg into the book, a literary work of “well, magic.”

That pretty well sums up my distaste for Harry Potter, by the way. These days, JKR has thoroughly crapped all over her reputation and legacy, but in the 2000′s it felt like half the planet was in a mad rush to canonize her as a writing goddess, to the point where fans were congratulating her for writing secret chapters that didn’t actually exist. The idea was based on lore from the books about Neville Longbottom’s parents. They were patients in a mental hospital, and he’d go to visit them, and they would give him bubble gum wrappers, intended to demonstrate how far remove they’ve become from reality. The secret chapter lies in those wrappers, which all read “Droobles Best Blowing Gum” or some such. What if Neville’s parents were only pretending to be mentally ill, so as to throw off their enemies? Naturally, they would want to stay in contact with their son, so the bubble gum wrappers would have to contain coded messages. Said code involves unscrambling the letters on the wrappers to make new words, like “goblin” or “sword” or “Muggle” or “Dumbledore”. The problem is that you can also use it to make other words like “booger” or “drool” or “booobbiess.” Play with it enough, and you can make the code say anything you want it to say, which means it’s no code at all.

But the idea was that the not-yet-published sixth HP book would reveal all of this gum wrapper nonsense, and Neville would decode the messages and discover all of his parents’ super-cool adventures. I’m not sure why we needed a secret chapter if Book 6 was going to explain all of this anyway in several not-secret chapters, but that was the whole point. Fans didn’t have Book 6 yet, and they were so desperate to read it that they started trying to extrapolate what would happen next based on “clues” from the previous five. That’s like trying to figure out what Majin Buu looks like by watching the Androids Saga. I guess some wiseguy would have guessed that he’d resemble #19, but that’d just be blind luck.

And when you get down to it, this whole secret chapter business is really just a conspiracy. This is literally how Qanon works. Some anonymous jackass posted vague “hints” on an imageboard, and people went goofy trying to interpret them and figure out what would happen in the future. They call it “research” because they spend a ton of time on this, but there’s no basis to any of it. It took me a few minutes to figure out that you can spell “Muggle” with the words in “Drooble’s Best Blowing Gum”, but that’s not research and it doesn’t prove anything. But all these guys keep looking for “Hilary Clinton goes to jail next week” and lo and behold that’s all they ever find.

In the same vein, the gum wrapper thing was really a complaint disguised as a conspiracy, disguised as a “magical secret chapter”. At least a few fans wanted to see more Neville in their Harry Potter books, they wanted Neville’s parents, or someone like them, to have cool spy adventures or whatever else. The point is, they clearly weren’t getting what they wanted out of the printed works, but they didn’t want to turn against their Dear Beloved Author, so they started casting about for an alternative reality, one where J.K. Rowling wrote a cooler story and hid it in the pages of the one that actually went to press. So instead of just saying “Hey, Order of the Phoenix was kind of a letdown, I hope there’s more ninjas in the next book,” they said “Rowling is a genius because I wanted ninjas and she’s definitely going to give them to me, I have the gum wrappers to prove it.”

The same thing happened all over again when the BBC Sherlock show took a turn for the nonsensical. I don’t know from BBC Sherlock, but I watched the fascinating video critique by Hbomberguy, and it sounds like the show did tons of plot twists until it stopped making sense altogether in the fourth season. If you skip to 1:09:00 in the video, you’ll hear about fan theories that suggested that season four was supposed to be crappy, as part of a secret meta-narrative plan that would be paid off in a secret, unannounced episode that would not only explain everything, but retroactively justify the crappy episodes that came before. But it’s been a few years and it never came to pass, so I think we can call this myth busted.

Most recently, I think we’ve all seen a lot of talk about the final season of Supernatural, where I guess Destiel sort of became canon but only one guy does the love confession and the other doesn’t respond. But I guess he does say “I love you too” in the Spanish dub, which means the English language version was edited for whatever reason. It’s not exactly a secret episode, but the implication is that there’s more to this than what made it to the screen. So the questions turn to what the screenplay said, what the writers and actors wanted to do, etc. etc. My general impression is that SPN fans are a bit more used to crushing disappointment, so they’re not quite as delusional about this show being unquestionable genius, like Sherlock and Harry Potter. Maybe this is an Anglophile thing? Like, if you suck at something with a British accent, people will accept it more unconditionally?

I had seen something on Twitter about how there should have been a secret Seinfeld episode in the 90′s. Someone suggested it at the time, they tape a whole episode, then wait until 2020 to air it, because by then it would be worth a fortune. But they didn’t do it, because it costs a lot of money to make a TV episode, and if you don’t air the show right away, you aren’t making that money back any time soon. Yeah, you might recoup a fortune someday, but Seinfeld was making a ton of money then. It exposes the fannish nature of the idea. A fan would love to discover a cool secret chapter, but a content creator isn’t necessarily keen on making a cool thing and then hiding it where few people would find it.

I thought about doing this myself recently. Maybe Supernatural gave me the bug, but I thought “I’m writing this big-ass story, so what if I wrote me a secret chapter for it? Wouldn’t that be cool?” But no, it wouldn’t be cool, because it’d be the same work as writing a regular chapter, and the same stress I feel when I hold off on publishing it. Except I’d just never publish it, I’d put it in some secret hole on the internet and hope that some superfan who might not even exist can decode whatever clues I leave.

I mean, it’d be awesome if it got discovered and everyone loved it. “Hey, I found this hidden chapter! Mike’s done it again!” And I could bask in the glory. But what if no one finds it? Then I just wasted my time, right? I want people to read my work. My monkey brain needs the sweet, sweet validation of those kudos and comments, folks. Once I realized that, I understood why no one else would want to do a secret chapter either. Easter eggs are one thing, but the bigger bonus features they put on DVDs were pretty easy to find, and with good reason.

I think that’s what made the Stanley Parable so appealing to play, because it teases you with the idea that you can “break” the game and find some extra content that you weren’t supposed to see, but as you go exploring all those hidden areas, it gradually becomes clear that this is just part of the game; you were meant to find all these things, and that’s why they were put here. It’s hidden, but he secret aspect of it is just pretend.

I suppose that what I like about games like TSP and Superliminal is the illusion of secrets more than the secrets themselves. I like roaming through the hallways, having no idea what I might find ahead. I kind of wish I could open all the doors, and not just the ones the game designers put stuff behind, but the reality is that there’s nothing on the other side. I used a cheat code once to explore the unused doors in TSP and it’s just a bright white field on the other side. Interesting to look at, but not much of a reveal. Honestly, the doors themselves are more appealing than anything that could lay behind them.

And that’s probably what makes secrets so fun. They could be almost anything, but once you open the present, the number of possibilities drops to one. If they had ever made that Secret BBC Sherlock Episode, I doubt it would have lived up to expectations, but fans could amuse themselves by imagining what could have been in it. In the end, though, things usually don’t justify the hype. For every Undertaker debut at Survivor Series 1990, there’s a Gobbledygooker debut at Survivor Series 1990. It’s impossible to manufacture a secret with a guaranteed payoff.

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crazy-food-lady · 3 years

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Steamed Buns - Bao Zi

This post was delayed by a music issue. The royalty free music was flagged as a copyright violation, and if that was going to stand, I wanted to replace it before posting (since replacing it after posting results an entirely new video from YouTube's perspective, which is a stupid pain in the butt).

On our second day of pandemic Chinese New Year,* my daughter and I really wanted to make bao zi, or steamed buns. I love these adorable puffed up parcels of deliciousness. This was also just the excuse I needed to get a proper bamboo steamer. These were surprisingly quick and easy to make.

The dough recipe surprisingly comes from Brian Boitano's video on The Food Network. There were other similar recipes out there, but I liked the addition of milk for a little added protein and the slightly lower sugar content. I got technique instructions from The Woks of Life and Recipe Tin Eats.

Bao Zi Recipe

DOUGH INGREDIENTS (makes 12)

2 ¼ tsp active dry yeast

½ cup warm water

3 cups all-purpose flour

3 Tbs sugar

½ tsp baking powder

½ cup warm milk

1Tbs vegetable oil

DOUGH DIRECTIONS

Sprinkle the yeast over the warm water in a small bowl to activate

In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, sugar, and baking powder

Make a well in the center of the dry ingredients and add the warm milk, canola oil, and the activated yeast; combine to create a shaggy dough

Turn it out onto a floured board or countertop and knead until the dough becomes smooth, soft, and pliable (about 5 to 10 minutes) or knead in your stand mixer with dough hook

Place dough in a lightly oiled bowl and turn it over once to coat; cover with a damp tea towel and allow the to rise undisturbed until doubled (40 minutes to 1 hour)

FILLING

Filling can be whatever you like, in whatever ratios you like. You'll need 1½ -2 cups of filling, or roughly a generous eighth cup of filling for each.

Veggies should be finely shredded so they don't puncture the bun.

Pork or meat should be cooked first (the hubby fried up some coarse ground pork for a more traditional pork flavor).

You can add hoisin sauce, oyster sauce, or soy sauce, if that makes you happy.

ASSEMBLY DIRECTIONS

Remove the dough from the bowl and roll it into 1 long rope; cut into 12 equal portions

Using a rolling pin or your hands, flatten each ball into 4-inch circles, leaving the center slightly thicker then its edges

Place filling in the center of each disk and pinch and twist the tops closed to seal

Arrange the buns on a greased or parchment lined tray and cover them with a tea towel

Allow the buns to rest for 10 minutes.

Prepare your steamer (pot with water and bamboo or stainless steel steamer)

When the buns are ready and the water is boiling, place the buns in steamer (parchment may prevent sticking); do not overcrowd; steam the buns in batches if necessary

Steam for 12 to 15 minutes, then remove the buns from the heat (carefully remove from the steamer as they may stick) and serve them warm

You may like a sauce for dipping (hoisin, peanut, soy, teriyaki, sriracha, etc.) or plain.

We reheated these over the next few days in the microwave, but some people prefer to reheat via steamer.

* Chinese New Year is a Chinese cultural approach to Lunar New Year (which is celebrated by a number of Asian populations).

Video for Visual Instructions

youtube

#Cooking #Steaming #Bao Zi #Steamed Buns #Chinese Cuisine #Asian Cuisine #Video #Chinese New Year

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labellacavalla-blog · 5 years

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Turmeric is Trending, Again!

Turmeric – the homeopathic world has been touting the benefits of turmeric for years. As with most of these alternative therapies, public interest waxes and wanes. Lately it's waxing. And for good reason. Turmeric is credited with a bounty of health benefits. Let's take a look at this remarkable rhizome.

Turmeric is native to several Asian countries. It is a perennial that can grow up to 3 feet tall. The part of the plant that is mostly used are the rhizomes (subterranean globes from which the roots grow).

The leaves are also used in cooking. Turmeric has been used for centuries first as a spice and then for its medicinal qualities. It has also been used as a dye. Although typically used in its dried, powdered form, turmeric also is used freshly grated, like it's cousin, ginger.

In the next section, I will discuss Turmeric's reported medicinal qualities. I will preface with the disclaimer that none of the applications have any hardcore scientific proof. (As we know the big pharmaceutical companies are not going to fund researching on something from which they cannot make money). With that said, there have been several clinical studies that have produced positive results. We can also listen to the experience and wisdom of centuries of ancient eastern cultures and at least try it for ourselves. Turmeric does not stay in the system for long, so there is little chance of toxicity due to over use.

Reported Health Benefits in Humans

The active ingredient in turmeric is curcumin, a phytochemical that is known for its effectiveness in treating a variety of conditions. Research suggests that this naturally-occurring phytochemical works even better than commercial pharmaceuticals marketed as treatments for liver and kidney ailments, inflammation, arthritis, heart health, skin conditions and certain cancers. It is reportedly an excellent detoxifier and immune booster. Depending on the source, the curcumin in turmeric can vary. Researchers suggest that to be most effective, your turmeric's cucumin content should not be less than 3%. However, if you cannot find a better grade, you can simply use a larger dose without any adverse effects.

How to Feed

Feeding turmeric is not terribly complicated. And, as stated above, it doesn't stay in the system long so there is little concern of feeding too much. However, you would not want to waste it. It only takes a a couple of teaspoons added to each meal to garner its many benefits. Research indicates that turmeric performs best with consumed with freshly ground pepper and a fat such as coconut or olive oil. The addition of black pepper and fat improves absorption This blend can be made into a paste that is gently cooked just so it can combine evenly. The mixture can be stored in a jar for up to two weeks in the refrigerator. Suggested ratio is: 2 tsp ground turmeric, combined with an ounce of oil or fat, and an eighth of a teaspoon of ground black peppercorns.

La Bella Cavalla's Turmeric Blend

La Bella Cavalla has take a little of this work out of the preparation for you. Our Turmeric Blend includes stabilized ground flax seed, rice bran, freshly ground black pepper and organic human-grade turmeric. The guaranteed curcumin content of the turmeric is never less than the recommended 3%. This blend does not require cooking or refrigeration. Sprinkle directly on your horse's food; it may be more palatable if moistened and mixed in. My horses don't mind it at all, in fact, they seem to really like it and lick their dishes clean.

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chocolatequeennk · 3 years

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Forever Timeless, 2/23

Ten x Rose, Donna x Lee

Betaed by @saecookie, @rudennotgingr, @pellaaearien, and @jabber-who-key

Tagging @doctorroseprompts for Doctor/Rose content

Part 7 of Being to Timelessness

AO3 | FF.NET | TSP

Ch 1

Chapter Two: Another Year, Another Adventure

Rose glanced at the familiar faces standing around the console as she worked quickly to set the coordinates. She tugged at the bond to get the Doctor’s attention. He checked the destination and immediately nodded.

“Barcelona!” he enthused.

Rose smiled and sent them into motion while he started rambling about the planet.

“Gorgeous tropical resort. We’ve been twice. Beautiful beaches, gorgeous waterfalls to hike, and—”

“Dogs with no noses,” Rose said along with him.

Donna raised an eyebrow. “You’re both nutters,” she said, shaking her head. “Dogs with no noses? How do they smell?”

The Doctor giggled. “Exactly!”

Rose planted her feet and everyone quickly grabbed onto something before the TARDIS landed on Barcelona with a teeth-jarring thud. “Barcelona,” Rose said, waving at the door.

Donna and Jenny exchanged a grin, then ran up the ramp and pushed the door open. Brilliant sunlight streamed into the console room, and Rose could smell the salt tang of the ocean in the air.

“Oh, I have missed this!” Donna said.

“Missed travelling the galaxy, or not spending hours on a plane getting someplace?” the Doctor asked.

“Both!”

Jenny and Donna stepped back inside and picked up the bags they’d left by the door. Before they left, Donna turned around and pointed at Rose, then at the Doctor. “All right, we’re going to leave you to celebrate your anniversary on your own. But you’d better come for us on time.”

“Or you’ll do what?” the Doctor retorted.

Rose groaned and pressed her fist to her forehead. She could hear the scowl on Donna’s face when their friend answered the Doctor.

“Or I’ll tie you down and bleach your hair blond,” she snapped.

Rose’s hand dropped to her mouth to hold back a laugh at the horrified expression on the Doctor’s face.

Donna nodded once, sharply. “Excellent. We’ll see you in a week, then.” She left the TARDIS and swung the door shut behind her.

“But… That’s…” The Doctor ran his hands through his hair.

Rose walked over to him and pulled his hands down, then smoothed over the most sticky-up pieces. “Don’t worry, Doctor. I like your hair too much to let her do that to you.”

He straightened his tie and preened. “It is pretty great, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, I love your hair.” Rose waited a beat, then said, “So I’ll make sure I’m driving when we go pick them up.”

“Oi!”

The Doctor grabbed for her, but Rose laughed and twisted away from him, adjusting the navigation settings as she went. She felt him following her movements and knew the moment he had remembered they were actually on their way to their own holiday destination.

“So do I finally get to find out what your secret holiday plans are?”

“Well…” she said, stretching it out the way he did. “I’m not sure if it’s check-in time yet.”

The Doctor narrowed his eyes. “This is a time machine,” he reminded her. “Which I’m fairly certain you are aware of.”

“Yeah, you might have mentioned it.”

He raised his eyebrows and gestured at the console. Rose laughed, but she finally obliged him. “Prepare yourself for the holiday of a lifetime,” she said dramatically as she threw the dematerialisation lever.

The ship spun into the Vortex, and Rose twirled the opposite direction, dancing around the console until she was next to the Doctor.

“Do you know what?” she asked.

He grinned and pressed a quick kiss to her lips before finishing the familiar line. “Travelling with you—I love it.”

The TARDIS landed, and the lights in the console room flashed. He looked up at the time rotor. “It seems I’m not the only one excited for this trip.”

Rose slung her deceptively small bag over her shoulder. “We’ve been working on this together. She says you’ve never been anywhere like this before.”

“Welllll, I’m not sure about that. Not this exact place, maybe, but—” The Doctor pulled the door open and stopped talking immediately.

Rose stepped up beside him and took his hand. “Welcome to Critias.”

The idea that had come to her while reading to Tony had taken a firm hold of her mind. As soon as they’d gotten home that night, she’d asked the TARDIS if it was even possible.

Is there a planet like Atlantis? Once they found the answer, they’d jumped at the chance.

The Doctor walked down the narrow alley as if in a trance and pressed his hand to the glass, fingers splayed out. A curious puffer fish swam forward to sniff at his fingers, but when he realised he couldn’t actually reach them, he swam away.

“This is…” The Doctor paused, then shook his head. “This is incredible, love. Thank you.”

“We explore the stars, but we never really touch this frontier,” Rose said.

“Another adventure with you.”

“Another year with you,” Rose corrected. “Happy anniversary, Doctor.”

Really, the Doctor reasoned, there was only one proper response when your bond mate wished you a happy anniversary. And so he wrapped an arm around Rose’s waist and pulled her close for a kiss.

“Thank you,” he murmured against her lips. “I love it.”

Rose pulled back and looked up at him, her nose wrinkled up a little. “Enough that it makes up for not getting a present? I didn’t get a chance to get you anything.”

The Doctor rested his hands on her hips and smiled down at her. “Absolutely. Although…” He pressed his tongue to the back of his teeth. “I don’t have a gift for you, either.”

Rose laughed. “You helped my mum and Pete set up their furniture last weekend, and you didn’t start one fight with Mum. That covers you for at least our anniversary.”

The Doctor chuckled. “All right. Now, where is this hotel?”

Rose pointed over his shoulder and he turned around to look at the building. It was positioned against the outer wall of the city, and he could easily imagine the kind of views the rooms would have.

He took a few steps down the alley, but Rose grabbed his hand and pulled him back. “I know I was joking when I said it wasn’t check-in time yet, but it really isn’t. I didn’t want to waste half the day by not getting here until mid afternoon.”

The Doctor nodded quickly. “Excellent decision. So, what should we do first?”

“Walk?” Rose suggested. “I can’t get enough of the view from the edge of the city.”

They moved from the alleyway to the path that snaked around the edge of the dome. “No, neither can I,” the Doctor agreed.

A giant piece of brilliant red seaweed floated by, the current picking up little tendrils and tugging them in different directions. A few more metres down the path, they watched a family of seahorses swim by.

“Why did they build a city under the ocean?” the Doctor wondered as they walked.

“I looked into that actually,” Rose said. “The planet was really struggling with overpopulation.”

He snorted. “So they decided to spread into the ocean? They’d squeezed out everyone on the surface and now they’d move into the fishes’ place too?”

Rose pinched him in the side. “Thought you were enjoying the trip,” she said pointedly.

“Oh, I am!” he said quickly. “Just… You know what, never mind. You’re right. So, there were too many humans on the surface—they are humans, it seems?”

Rose shook her head. “Nope. Critians are humanoid—I suppose you could say they look Time Lord—but they aren’t human. I dunno how they’re different exactly, but they are.”

The Doctor bit his tongue before he could launch into a rant on Rassilon spreading the Gallifreyan body type around the galaxy. There was a time and a place, and this was not it.

oOoOo

Their suite was an incredible underwater oasis. The hotel was situated against the main exterior bubble of the city, and each room actually bulged out into the open sea.

The Doctor watched the fish swim by while Rose slept on their first night there. He finally fell asleep as a jellyfish lazily drifted past.

The view when he woke up was not so tranquil. Several long tentacles were wrapped around their domed ceiling, and a giant eye peered in through the glass.

His quick indrawn breath and suddenly tense muscles were enough to wake Rose up. “Wha’s wrong?” she asked groggily.

The Doctor had processed what he was looking at, and he was a little embarrassed to have been so easily startled. “Just found a Peeping Tom,” he said, trying to deflect from his own reaction.

Rose rolled slightly and looked up at the ceiling. The Doctor could feel her trying to grasp what she was seeing, and then finally she giggled. “Look, he’s stuck on you, Doctor.”

The Doctor rolled his eyes and huffed. “Really, Rose?”

Rose shifted closer to him, sliding her leg over his and wrapping an arm over his chest. “I dunno,” she whispered against his neck. “Stuck on you’s not so bad.”

The Doctor hissed and tilted his head back when she kissed the sensitive spot on his jaw, just below his ear. Rose smiled and scraped her teeth over the spot before sucking gently.

“Yeah, I like being stuck on you.”

The Doctor’s eyes blinked open, his gaze still met by the steady curiosity of the squid. He arched an eyebrow, then rolled over so he was looking down at Rose. “I’d rather watch you than our friendly cephalopod,” he murmured.

Rose laughed again, just as he pressed his lips to hers.

oOoOo

The squid was long gone by the time the Doctor and Rose were enjoying breakfast in bed. “What do you want to do today?” the Doctor asked in between bites of a fluffy pastry.

She shrugged. “Whatever you want. It’s a new planet to both of us—it might be fun to just hit all the main tourist spots.”

She bit into a pinkish fruit, and her eyes widened. “Try this,” she insisted, holding a bite out for him.

The Doctor wrapped his fingers around her wrist to hold her hand steady, then he bent to pull the fruit off her fork with his teeth. As soon as the flavour hit his tongue, he knew why Rose had been so insistent.

“Mmmm, banana.” He smacked his lips and immediately selected another slice from the tray. “A sea banana,” he added gleefully.

“Did you know there were other fruits in the galaxy that tasted like banana?”

He scoffed. “If I knew there were other perfect foods in the world, we would have them at home.”

Rose shook her head and laughed. “Of course, why did I even ask? I guess finding some sea bananas to take home is going on the list of must-see attractions.”

“Oh yes!”

They shared bites back and forth, enjoying all the unique flavours of Critian food. Once the platter was mostly picked clean, Rose kissed him on the cheek and slid out of bed. “Why don’t you look up things to do while I take a shower? I bet you can find out what that fruit is and where we can get some.”

The Doctor took the tour guide tablet from the nightstand and made quick work of his research. He learned that kaju, the sea banana, was a favourite food of the Critians. There were several speciality food shops selling it, but only one farm you could tour. He’d just booked two tickets for the morning tour when Rose exited the en suite, wrapped in a fluffy white robe.

“Your turn.”

He handed her the tablet. “Why don’t you find something for us to do this afternoon?” he suggested.

Rose waited until she heard the shower running, then she pulled out the outfit she’d hidden at the bottom of their suitcase. The soft denim of her favourite dark jeans fit her perfectly, moulded by countless wears.

But her top… She sighed when the soft wool jumper brushed against her cheek as she pulled it over her head. The TARDIS had put it in her closet yesterday when she’d been packing, and Rose hadn’t needed help connecting the dots.

She’d just laced up her black boots when someone knocked on the door. “Concierge service!”

Rose walked to the door, leaving her leather jacket draped over the chair. A uniformed employee stood on the other side of the door, a tray in hand.

“Hi!”

The concierge held out the tray and Rose took the envelope. “Your tickets to the underwater garden just arrived,” they said.

Rose blinked, then she shook her head. “I don’t suppose that’s where those delicious sea bananas are grown.”

As she asked, she heard the shower turn off. She started a mental countdown to when the Doctor would appear.

The Critian tilted their head, a hint of confusion crossing their face. “If by sea bananas, you mean kaju… then yes, this the one public farm where it is grown. After the tour, you will be able to buy some of the fruit to take home.”

Rose laughed. “I bet we will. Thank you,” she told the alien. The employee bowed and exited the room.

“Who was that?” the Doctor called from their bedroom.

“Concierge services with our tour tickets,” Rose replied.

“Oooh, excellent! I hope they have a little shop. A little shop to buy all the kaju we want! Can you imagine, Rose?”

“I’m pretty sure I won’t need to use my imagination by the end of the day,” Rose said under her breath.

“I heard that!” The Doctor’s voice was coming closer, and Rose rubbed her palms on her jeans. “I’ll have you know…”

His mouth fell open when he saw what she was wearing. From a man as verbose as him, his silence was extremely gratifying. “Doctor?”

The Doctor slowly lowered his hands from his tie and walked towards her. His eyes were dark, and anticipation buzzed through Rose as she waited for his response. “That jumper is mine,” he said, his voice raspy.

Rose bit back a smirk. “The TARDIS put it in my closet,” she told him. “Think that means it’s mine now—possession is nine-tenths of the law, after all.”

His Adam’s apple bobbed.

The sleeves hung past her wrists, and Rose pressed her wool-covered hand to her cheek. “‘Sides, I like it. It’s soft.”

His fingers twitched, and Rose waited just a second longer before smiling brightly at him. “Come on, we need to get going if we’re going to make our tour.”

The Doctor gaped at her—at Rose, standing just six feet away from him, wearing clothes that used to be his. Rose, who was now giving him a cheeky smile as she waved the tickets in front of his face.

“Don’t you want to go see the kaju farm?” she asked, almost managing to sound innocent.

He growled and moved quickly to pull Rose into his arms. He could hear her heartbeat speed up and his two hearts held tempo with hers.

“Rose Tyler…”

Her pulse was racing now. “Yes Doctor?” She smiled, teasing him with the tip of her tongue.

The Doctor dipped his head down and pressed his lips to hers, following her tongue back into her mouth. Rose slid her hands over his shoulders and a moment later, he felt them in his hair.

He shivered, and before he could lose himself in the kiss, he slowly pulled back. Rose’s eyes fluttered open, and her passion-glazed expression tempted him again.

Instead, he slowly removed his hands from her waist, tugging on the hem of the jumper as he pulled away. “We’ll come back to this later,” he promised.

She blinked a few times, then smiled up at him. “Oh, yes,” she agreed.

The Doctor took her hand. “But for now, kaju!” Rose laughed as he pulled her out of their suite, and he giggled along with her.

Rose hip checked the Doctor as they left the hotel. He glanced down at her, his eyebrow raised in question. She smiled and shifted closer to him, putting her free hand on his arm.

Nothing. Just love you, that’s all.

Yeah? I love you too.

The Critias streets were busier than they had been the day before, and they arrived at the garden entrance just as the tour was starting. “Wait wait!” The Doctor waved their tickets over his head. “Two more!”

A teenager waved at them from behind the counter. “I can take your tickets!” she said, her high ponytail bobbing with each word. She smiled brightly when the Doctor handed them over. “Have fun! Corin will show you all around the farm.”

They joined the queue, and a young man with a shock of black hair draped over one eye scowled at them. “We all ready then?” he asked.

“Oh yes!” The Doctor bounced on his toes. “This is going to be the highlight of our trip.”

The guide rolled his eyes and turned around. “Come on. The entrance to the tunnels is this way.”

“Tunnels?” Rose asked as he led them along a boring hallway.

He shot her a look over his shoulder. “Well yeah. Kaju grows under the sea. How did you think we were going to get there?”

Rose had half a mind to call him out for his surly attitude, but the Doctor started talking before she could. “I bet you love your job,” he enthused. “You probably get all the kaju you want, for free.”

The kid huffed. “Why would I want any of that nasty stuff?”

They reached a glass door in the exterior bubble of the city, and he turned around and held his hand up. “All right, listen up everyone!” he called out, raising his voice to be heard over the hum of machinery coming from the next room over. “We have built glass tunnels in a path around the kaju beds. Along the tour, you will see kaju in various stages of growth. At the end, you will have a chance to taste fresh kaju, and to buy any of the products we make in the factory you hear behind you.”

He crossed his arms over his chest and raised his eyebrows. “Please stay with the group at all times. If you do not, you will be escorted out of the tunnels and asked to leave the premises.”

The whole group murmured their assent, and he grunted and opened the doors.

The light in the tunnel was dim. Rose squinted, trying to get a glimpse of the garden before stepping out under the sea. She and the Doctor were at the back of the line, and she gasped when she finally realised why the light was so eerie.

The glass tunnel had formed an arbor for a network of tangled vines. The artificial lights used by the farm filtered through the greenery, like sunlight through the leaves of a thick forest. Rose pressed her hand to the glass and watched the way the leaves drifted in the current.

“Why don’t you like kaju?”

Rose blinked; that was the Doctor’s voice, but it was coming from the other side of the tour group. She looked around and spotted him standing next to their guide, his eyebrow arched in surprise.

Corin was a good six inches shorter than the Doctor, and he scowled up at him. “Because it’s a disgusting fruit and I don’t know why anyone would eat it.”

Determination pulsed over the bond, and Rose groaned. “Excuse me,” she said as she made her way through the tour group to join the Doctor.

“Have you ever had kaju pancakes?” the Doctor asked. “Or kaju toffee pie?”

The kid sneered. “No, thank you.”

He spun on his heel and addressed the whole group. “What you see above you is an arbor of fully grown kaju. As you can see, the plant is a vine that needs some sort of support to grow on. If you’ll follow me, our next stop is a bed of kaju seedlings.”

The group moved slowly through the tunnel. The light changed as the vines overhead thinned. Finally they entered a large, round room, big enough for everyone to look out at the ocean floor.

“Like most vines, kaju can be grown from starts. However, one of the things we sell as a commercial garden are seedlings. Ambitious gardeners buy kaju plants from us to start their own garden.”

“Oh!”

Corin levelled a glare at the Doctor. “They do have to be grown under the ocean, so unless you have a proper growing environment, don’t even bother.”

The Doctor pressed his tongue to the back of his teeth. “Right. Yeah,” he said slowly.

Rose narrowed her eyes. We’ve got regular bananas, remember? She wasn’t sure the TARDIS could make an underwater room, and even if she could, Rose had no desire to start a kaju farm.

The Doctor pouted, but she shook her head firmly. Bananas are perfectly good.

Bananas are brilliant! he corrected. Rose raised an eyebrow and the Doctor rolled his eyes. All right, you win.

They were given five minutes to watch the gardeners carefully tend to the young plants, then Corin led them down another tunnel into a different open room.

Row after row of vines draped over arbors spread out around them. “These kaju plants are at the height of their production cycle. Much of the kaju you eat comes from plants just like these.”

The group murmured and spread out to watch the workers carefully trimming the vines and harvesting ripe fruit. Rose blinked when she realised the whole fruit was small and round. It looked much more like an orange than a banana.

“What about fried kaju? Or kaju served with ice cream and chocolate?”

Rose debated pulling the Doctor back, but Corin really deserved to be pestered. He had been rude from the moment the tour started. So instead, she rocked back on her heels and watched.

“I can’t stand the smell, or the taste, or the texture,” the kid spat out. “The seeds get stuck in your teeth and if you eat too much, it stains your tongue bright pink.”

The Doctor backed away half a step and blinked several times. Corin nodded sharply and spun around to walk away.

Rose joined the Doctor then and tugged on his sleeve before he could chase after the kid. You can suggest other preparations later, she told him, feeling slightly mischievous. Maybe he should try kaju bread, or chocolate dipped kaju.

The Doctor nodded, then stuck his tongue out for her to examine. “Ish ma tongue bwight pink?” he asked.

Rose laughed. “Nope, just regular pink. Apparently you haven’t had enough kaju yet.”

It was mesmerising to look at the evenly laid out rows of kaju and the careful way the attendants cared for the vines. But after ten minutes, they were directed down another tunnel, back to a door.

“The garden part of our tour is over,” Corin declared dramatically. “Behind this door, you’ll find the factory where we produce kaju jam and other items for sale. Please take a pair of noise cancelling headphones when you step inside. The machines are incredibly loud.”

Rose winced when he opened the door. The entire group pressed their hands to their ears until they passed through the door and could take a pair of the headphones.

How are we supposed to hear the dulcet tones of our tour guide like this?

She needn’t have worried. His grumpy voice came through the headphones, and when she looked at him, she realised his headset had a microphone as well.

“Today we’re manufacturing kaju pie filling,” he said, gesturing at the conveyor belt where empty glass jars were filled with a creamy, kaju coloured filling. “The filling is produced in that large vat over there.” He pointed up at a vat near the top of the production line. “Raw kaju is cooked down and blended, then sugar and spices are added.”

Out of the corner of her eye, Rose saw the Doctor nodding. She shook her head; she had a feeling there was a kaju pie in their future.

They watched the assembly line for a few minutes longer. After the jars were filled with pie filling, lids were tightly sealed on and labels wrapped on the jar. Then they shot down to the end of the line where they were packed in boxes by workers.

“If you’ll follow me.”

The tour group slowly filtered out of the factory back into the blessedly quiet hallway. Two employees were waiting, one ready to take the headphones from them and another with a tray of sliced kaju.

Corin opened the door to the sales room and gestured through it. “That concludes our tour. You are now free to buy as much kaju merchandise as you would like.”

The Doctor sidled up to him. “Have you ever tried kaju bread?” he asked.

The young man’s face turned red, but the Doctor ignored it.

“What about chocolate dipped kaju? Dip slices in chocolate and then freeze them. Fantastic treat for a hot day.” He paused and scratched his sideburn. “Er, is it ever hot here?”

“Listen,” Corin growled. “I do not like kaju. I will never like kaju. It doesn’t matter how it’s prepared, it’s a vile fruit and I refuse to eat it.” He smirked suddenly. “But if you like it so much…”

He ran off quickly before the Doctor could say anything. A moment later he was back with a jar in his hand. “Kaju jam.” He ran off again and returned with two large tubs. “Kaju butter and kaju yogurt.” He left and came back with bags in hand. “Kaju fruit leather, chocolate covered kaju, and dried kaju.”

The Doctor’s arms were full. He stared down at the bounty then up at the guide. “Thank you!”

The uncharacteristic smile melted away into the familiar scowl. “You are an absolute nutter,” the kid growled. Then he spun around and stalked off.

The Doctor heard something rolling on the floor and turned around to see Rose with a trolley. She took a few items out of his hands and they filled the cart with everything the guide had brought.

“What was that about?” the Doctor asked, still wondering what had gotten into the guide.

Rose laughed. “I think he thought that if he brought you enough kaju products, you would realise it was disgusting. Then you’d have to find a way to put it all back.”

“Huh.” The Doctor scratched at his sideburn. “Well, let’s see what other kaju products we can find.”

Thirty minutes later, they left the farm with several bags full of kaju products. By mutual agreement, they detoured to the TARDIS to put it all away.

The ship sang to Rose as they walked through the door, and she started laughing. “Someone’s glad I talked you out of growing our own kaju,” she told the Doctor.

oOoOo

The street lights had shifted from their bright daytime mode to a nighttime setting when the Doctor and Rose finally made their way back to the hotel. Street musicians played beneath the street lights, and stray cats darted into the shadowy corners to hide.

The Doctor swiped their keycard over the pad and the door slid open. It closed silently behind them after they entered the room. Rose tapped the lamp and soft light filled the room.

“So was that a good way to spend our fourth anniversary?”she asked him.

He chuckled. “It was a brilliant way to spend our anniversary,” he agreed as he shrugged out of his coat.

He had just tossed it onto the coat rack when someone knocked sharply on the door. Rose raised an eyebrow, and he grinned at her. “Just a little late night snack I ordered for us,” he told her. “Why don’t you go get settled in the living room and I’ll bring it in.” He waited for her to move into the living room, then tapped the door control.

“Your dessert, sir,” the server said, presenting a covered tray with a flourish.

The Doctor lifted the silver cover just enough to make sure everything was as ordered. Chocolate, kaju, mellora berries, and a decanted bottle of Rigellian wine. Perfect.

“Thank you.” He took the tray and the server nodded once, then walked away.

Rose was curled up on the sofa under a blanket when the Doctor entered the living room. He set the tray down on the coffee table and crossed the room to the fireplace controls. “This will warm things up pretty quickly,” he said once the cheery gaslit flames started.

He stuck his tongue out at Rose as he walked back to her. “I suppose it’s a good thing you filched that jumper from me,” he teased. “They don’t exactly keep the ambient temperature of Critias very warm.”

He started to pour two glasses of the wine, while still watching Rose from the corner of his eye. She rubbed her cheek against the jumper again and shook her head.

“That’s not why I wore it,” she said quietly.

The Doctor set the decanter down and turned to face Rose. Her playful attitude had faded into something softer and warmer. “Then why did you wear it?” he asked, genuinely curious. “To turn me on?”

Her eyes twinkled. “A little. But mostly…” She reached for his hand. “This jumper is something from who you were when I met you. Today’s our anniversary and…” She brushed her thumb over his pulse points. “And I married that Doctor, too.”

The Doctor opened his mouth, but he couldn’t push words past the lump in his throat. Instead, he slid closer to Rose on the sofa and reached for her over the bond at the same time.

I love you. He brushed his fingers over her cheek, and when Rose tipped her face upwards, he took the invitation and pressed a kiss to her lips. I love you now and I loved you then. You are my forever, both past and future.

Rose sighed and scraped her fingernails over his scalp. I loved that you, with your leather jacket and jumpers. I love this you, with your suits and Chucks. You have always been my Doctor.

The Doctor moved his hand down to Rose’s waist so he could pull her closer. As she shifted into his lap, the feeling of soft skin under his hand pulled him out of the kiss. He looked down at the bare leg slung over his own and swallowed.

“Are you…” His voice squeaked and he cleared his throat. “Are you wearing anything under that jumper?”

Rose slid her hands over his shoulders and played with the hair at the nape of his neck. “Why don’t you find out?” she suggested.

The Doctor closed his eyes and took several shallow breaths. Then he shifted his weight and pushed himself to his feet, holding Rose close as he stood up. “I think it’s time for a change in venue.”

oOoOo

A visit to Critias was almost like a beach holiday, except in all the ways it wasn’t. Their ocean view room gave them a view into the underwater life instead of the surface. They didn’t see their squid friend again, but several other forms of sea life floated by to say hello.

They rented diving equipment and went out into the water, but they couldn’t feel the sun on their faces. The marine animals around the resort were so accustomed to visitors that they didn’t move as the Doctor and Rose slowly swam past.

But the strangest difference, and the one that helped Rose when it came time to leave, was that there were no sunsets. She loved watching the sun set over the ocean, but they couldn’t even see the sun from who knew how many leagues under the sea.

There were no stars, either, and after a week beneath the surface of the ocean, both she and the Doctor were ready to be out in the open air.

They packed up their belongings and paid their bill, then walked back to the TARDIS.

The Doctor slung his coat over a strut and circled the console, adjusting the navigation controls as he went. “Be careful,” Rose warned as he spun a dial wildly before stopping it and twisting it into place. “Remember what Donna threatened to do if we don’t pick them up on time.”

He clapped his hands to his head, protecting his hair. “That is not happening,” he declared adamantly. “Not in this lifetime. This body would not look good with platinum blond hair.”

Rose nodded. “Then watch what you’re doing while you’re setting the coordinates.”

The Doctor huffed, but he slowed down, being careful to notch each dial in exactly the right spot. Rose watched, and she nodded when he set the last one in place.

“All right, let’s go.” Being closer to the dematerialisation lever, she grabbed it and shoved it into place.

The TARDIS made a grinding sound as she moved into the Vortex, and Rose stroked the console. “Come on, old girl,” she muttered. “I know you’ll take us where we need to go.” The grinding didn’t stop, but a soft hum joined it. Both Rose and the Doctor let out a breath.

The landing rocked them a little, but they straightened up and walked to the door. The Doctor reached it first and reached for the handle. “Come on, Rose. Let’s enjoy the look on Donna’s face when she realises we’ve made a perfect landing.”

The first thing he registered when he opened the door was that it was night. Well, a few hours off, he reasoned, even as his hearts sank into his plimsolls. Maybe we’re early, even.

But not only was it not morning, they were nowhere near a city. He stared at the large house in front of them, trying to make sense of where they were.

Rose patted him on the arm. “I think you’ll look gorgeous as a blond.”

#ficandchips #ten x rose #dwfic #fic by Nancy #doctorroseprompts #this is your surprise bonus chapter this week #next week we'll be back to every tuesday like always

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lastbluetardis · 3 years

Text

Chemical Reaction (20/22)

Summary: Though their chemistry class is now over, the chemistry between James and Rose is just getting started. Together, they navigate the highs of new love and the lows of coping with past trauma to forge deep and unbreakable bonds of love and commitment. Part 2 in the Catalysis series. Tagging @doctorroseprompts

This chapter: ~8000 words, explicit

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James awoke slowly, groggily. His head was pounding and his eyes were scratchy and blurry. He had slept deeply and dreamlessly, and now that he was drifting towards consciousness, he had absolutely no idea where he was or what day it was. If he’d had to give the year or month, he wasn’t sure he would have been able to do it.

He would have been perfectly content to close his eyes and try to fall back to sleep; however, the cat yowling at the foot of the bed was making that impossible, as was the sharp, pulsing ache in his bladder. Had he gone out drinking the night before? That might explain his throbbing head, his desperate need for the toilet, and the reason he was asleep in a strange bed.

“Pippin, shut it.”

James blinked through the haze of his vision. Rose lay next to him, but they weren’t in his bed. And they definitely weren’t in Rose’s bed; he had way too much room to splay his legs without them falling off the mattress. But the room was familiar. They were… in his guest room?

The events of the past night finally clicked. Rose was here. Rose was here after they’d made up from their awful fight, and she’d stayed the night with him.

His chest warmed with love and gratitude at the sight of Rose pulling a pillow over her head as Pippin began meowing more earnestly upon realizing both humans were awake.

“I hate your cat,” Rose mumbled, her voice nearly inaudible.

“You love him,” he cooed. Pippin paced in the thin strip of space between their bodies, then stepped onto James’s lower belly. James yelped and swiped his cat to the floor, ignoring Pippin’s cry.

Rose snorted. “All right?”

“I really need a wee,” he squeaked. He vaulted out of bed and sprinted across the hall to the guest bathroom, ignoring Rose’s laughter behind him.

After attending to his over-full bladder, James stumbled to the kitchen—noticing with a grumble it was only seven in the morning—and he filled Pippin and Merry’s food dishes. Preemptively, he went into the basement and placed their bowls down there, knowing he would start painting before too long. Neither cat realized what he intended to do until he trekked up the stairs and closed the door behind him. He heard the frantic sounds of racing feet, then the scratching of paws and claws at the door, followed by the most piteous mewl he’d ever heard.

“Oh, you’re fine,” he said. “Go eat your breakfast, bud.”

Not particularly wanting to stand there arguing with his cat, James turned away from the basement door and went into his guest room. Rose was snoring lightly, her chest rising and falling with her even breaths.

He hadn’t been sure if he would see this sight again, and he knew he would never take it for granted. Though wide awake, thanks to his stupid cat, James instead slipped beneath the sheets once more, nestling deep into the mattress. It wasn’t as cozy as his mattress, a little too firm for his liking. He suddenly wondered whether Rose liked his other bed or favored this one; in all the months they’d been sharing a bed, he never once thought to ask if she preferred firmer or softer mattresses. Maybe they could invest in one of those fancy, dual-firmness mattresses he was always seeing commercials for on the television.

James began getting antsy after only a few minutes of lying beside Rose. He tried to ignore it, to take advantage of snuggling with her, but his mind was awake and itching to do something. Plus, they weren’t really snuggling. He was on his side, watching her sleep.

Not creepy at all, he muttered to himself.

Noticing that he was beginning to fidget, James relented with a sigh. Pecking a soft, barely-there kiss to her forehead, he slipped out of bed again and padded into his kitchen to start coffee and clean up the dishes from the night before.

Quietly as he could, he emptied the dishwasher and hand-washed the few dirty dishes in his sink while his coffee brewed. He had the belated realization that the scent of coffee might be enough to disturb and wake Rose. Oops.

Well, there was nothing he could do about it now. He grabbed his hazelnut-flavored creamer from the fridge and poured a healthy dollop into the bottom of his caffeine molecule mug. He took his coffee to the kitchen table and grabbed a crossword puzzle book to keep himself busy; he didn’t want to start painting yet, since the fumes and the noise would probably wake Rose, if she wasn’t already awake.

Surprisingly, it was another hour before Rose joined him. James was deeply engrossed in his crossword and didn’t hear her soft footsteps; he jumped when she linked her arms around his neck and rested her chin on the top of his head.

“Morning,” she murmured, voice gravelly.

“Morning.” He tilted his head up, accepting her kiss.

“Did you sleep well?” she asked.

“Mhm. Like a rock. Which is nice, since I slept for maybe four hours last night. Well. Last morning. I didn’t actually try to go to bed until six, and I didn’t really sleep. Just sorta dozed on and off and…”

“You went to bed at six?” Rose interrupted, a frown evident in her voice.

“I was busy,” he said, a little defensively. “Gollum wee’d on my bed and the guest bed, so I had to wash all the sheets and duvets. D’you know how long it takes those things to dry? Oh, by the way, Gollum’s got a UTI. He’s at the vet. I should be able to pick him up today or tomorrow. But I was busy washing all of the blankets and sheets, and then I figured I would vacuum and wash my bathrooms between loads, and then I realized I hadn’t dusted in a while, so I—”

Rose leaned down and silenced him with a swift, hard kiss. His mind went blank as he cupped his hand around the back of her neck to hold her in place. She pulled away too soon for his liking and utterly ignored his pout.

“I love you, but blimey, you need to work on not talkin’ so much before I’ve had my first cuppa tea,” she drawled, ruffling his hair.

She moved away from him to start the kettle and to grab a mug and tea bag. James stood and refilled his mug with his third cup of coffee.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked, filling the mug to the brim to finish off the coffee in the pot.

“Not really,” she admitted.

James’s shoulders slumped. “Oh. Was it the mattress?”

Rose blinked. “What? No.”

“Is that mattress too firm?”

“No, it…”

“Do you like the mattress in my bedroom? I was thinking this morning that I never really considered the type of mattress you like, and if you don’t like what I have we can go shopping together for something you and I can both comfortably sleep on and…”

“Jesus Christ,” Rose muttered under her breath, rubbing the heels of her hands into her eyes.

James abruptly stopped speaking, his ears and cheeks burning. “Er, sorry.”

“Your mattresses are fine,” she said. “If you would’ve let me finish, I was about to say I had weird dreams that kept waking me up. I dreamt Jimmy showed up. In one of the dreams, you and him became best friends…”

“Fat fucking chance,” James blurted, irrationally irritated at his dream self. “Rose you know I would never…”

Rose rolled her eyes. “I know. Didn’t keep my subconscious from dreamin’ about it though. And in another, Jimmy kept shoutin’ at me for the most ridiculous things that I can’t really remember. I didn’t want to keep dreaming about him, so I figured I’d get up and we could start painting your bedroom.”

James stepped up to her, arms outstretched for a hug, if she wanted it. She did, and tucked her head beneath his chin, linking her arms around his hips.

“I haven’t responded to Jimmy yet,” she said quietly. “I didn’t tell him I got his letter. I don’t know what to say to him. Or if I even should say anything.”

James gave her a tight squeeze. He wanted to tell her to block his number and burn his letter, but ultimately the decision was hers. He would simply be there for comfort and support, a shoulder to lean on, an ear to vent to.

“I’m proud of you,” he whispered, kissing the top of her head. “So proud. I’ll be here for you no matter what.”

She tightened her hold around him, nearly clinging to him and ignoring the beeping of the kettle.

“Thanks.” She sighed and pressed a kiss to his collarbone. “I’m gonna make an effort to tell you when I talk to Jimmy. If I talk to him.”

James ran his fingers through her hair. “I’ll be here to listen when you’re ready.” He kissed her gently. “Can I make you some tea and toast?”

She nodded and loosened her arms from around his hips, then allowed herself to be guided to an empty kitchen chair.

They ate a meager breakfast of toast and scrambled eggs while they sipped their respective hot beverages. When they’d finished eating and their plates and mugs were in the sink, James led Rose to the guest bedroom and found some old, ratty clothes she could borrow. He donned the shorts and paint-splattered t-shirt he’d worn the day before, and gave Rose a pair of mesh shorts and a frayed, stained t-shirt he often wore to do yard work.

“Right! Ready to get painty?” he crowed, clapping his hands together,

Rose giggled and nodded, but paused and asked, “Are Merry and Pippin gonna get in our way?”

“Locked ‘em in the basement,” he assured. As though to alert the world of his displeasure, Pippin began meowing very loudly from the basement door.

Ignoring his wailing cat, James took his phone with him in case the vet called, then he walked down the hall and flung open his bedroom door. The paint smell had dissipated somewhat overnight, and to his delight, all the walls looked dry enough for a second coat of paint.

They took a few minutes to discuss a plan of attack, wherein it was decided James would put the second coat on the ceiling while Rose started on the walls. That was how the next few hours passed, with James climbing up and down the ladder and working around Rose.

When the ceiling was completed, James opened up the can of glossy white paint to get started on the crown molding. Rose had finished two of the four walls, and they looked beautiful; the paint was even, with no brush or roller marks left behind.

His legs and core were getting sore from balancing on the ladder, and he wanted to say sod it to the crown molding. But he hadn’t been particularly careful when applying the paint to his walls and ceiling; as a result, the trim work was speckled with blue-gray paint. With a sigh, James dipped one of his smaller brushes and began the arduous, painstaking task of painting the trim around the ceiling.

After about an hour of scaling up and down the ladder, of reaching up and out to apply the paint, his back and shoulders were nearly burning with exertion. While he wanted nothing more than to stop for the day, he was eager to have this damn project finished. He was tired of his house smelling like paint and of needing to keep his poor cats sequestered in the basement.

He climbed down the ladder and returned the lid to the paint can, figuring they were due for a lunch break. With a groan, James leaned down and touched his toes, twisting slightly. It crackled like a bag of crisps. He exhaled as he straightened, then lifted his arms up and over his head. His back popped loudly, spreading relief through his entire spine.

“God that felt good,” he sighed, raking his hands through his hair. It felt a little damp with supposed perspiration.

“You’re covered in paint.”

James glanced over to where Rose was working the paint roller up and down the walls to apply a clean, even coat. His focus narrowed to the flex of her shoulders, visible even through the over-large t-shirt she was wearing. His mind’s eye could easily see the soft, smooth expanse of her back, the jut of her shoulder blades, the flesh on either side of the valley of her spine, the subtle dimples that peeked just above the waistband of her trousers. His fingers itched to push her shirt up, to map out her back and her belly, to press himself against her and kiss the side of her neck and her shoulder and…

He forgot she had spoken until she glanced over her shoulder at him expectantly.

He cleared his throat. “Well, you’re one to talk. You’re covered in paint too.” She’d pulled her hair up into a messy bun at the beginning of their venture, and several strands had escaped over the course of the morning, billowing around her face. Small streaks of paint adorned her forehead and cheeks from where she no doubt impatiently pushed her hair aside. “Besides, we’re painting. By default, that means we’re going to end up covered in it.”

Rose grinned, her tongue poking out of the side of her mouth. His stomach gave a funny little lurch, and he wanted to chase her tongue with his.

“Your hair is practically white,” she teased.

“No, it’s not,” he said, rolling his eyes fondly. “Don’t be dramatic.”

“Oh yeah?” she challenged. “Look at your hands.”

He blinked at her, then glanced down. To his horror, he saw that most of his right palm was coated in paint. He looked to the ladder: the brush he’d been using had wet, sticky paint all along the handle.

“Oh, no,” he moaned. He raced into his en suite and saw that Rose was right: paint was streaked and clumped in with his hair.

He groaned.

“Told ya.”

Rose stood behind him and linked her arms loosely around his middle. She rested her palms on his stomach and began to rub long, lazy lines up and down his torso. Goosebumps rippled across his skin and he tried to keep himself from shuddering at her touch.

“You ought to be more careful about where you set your brush,” she murmured, stretching onto her tiptoes to plant a kiss to the nape of his neck, right above his shirt collar. “Want some help washing it out?”

“My beautiful hair,” he whined, mostly to hear her laugh.

He succeeded; she giggled and reached up to ruffle his poor, paint-splattered hair. He could feel how stiff it had gotten with paint.

“C’mere.”

Rose dropped her arms from around his middle and skipped into the bedroom for the roll of paper towel they’d been using to try to keep their hands relatively clean. Clearly he had failed in that regard, and his hair had paid the price.

While she did that, James washed his hands, scratching at the dried paint with his nails until his hands were spotless and pink once more. He then angled his head at Rose when she finally joined him in the en suite. But she shook her head and boosted herself up onto the vanity countertop instead. She ripped off a few sheets of paper towels and ran them under warm water to moisten them.

She gestured for him to step closer, and he readily did. He was not expecting, however, for Rose to link her legs around his hips. She hooked her ankles over one another behind his thighs and pulled him even closer. He sucked in a sharp breath as the front of his hips met with hers.

Automatically, he rested his hands on her thighs. Her borrowed shorts had ridden up, and he couldn’t help but touch her bare skin. Her legs tensed, drawing him in, before they relaxed again.

“C’mere,” she repeated, and he leaned into her.

He dropped his head so it was in easier reach for her; his new vantage gave him a teasing view down the front of her shirt, which had gaped low in front as she leaned forward and up. He couldn’t see anything beyond the soft swell of the tops of her breasts and he had the ridiculous urge to rip the front of her shirt open.

Rose sank her fingers into his hair as she began to scrub the damp paper towel through it. He bit his lip as sparks of pleasure shot across his scalp whenever she used her nails to scratch at a particularly stubborn bit of paint.

“God, you really worked it in deep,” Rose muttered, voice an octave lower than normal.

“What can I say? I’m very thorough.” His voice cracked, and he cleared it impatiently.

Rose’s hands gradually stilled in his hair. She set the damp cloth to the side and he took that to mean she had given up on his hair. He lifted his head and met her gaze, as dark and hungry as the desire churning in his gut.

He wasn’t sure who moved first, but suddenly their lips met, softly at first them more urgently as Rose flung her arms around his neck to pull him closer. Not knowing where to put his hands, he cradled them at her lower back, splaying his palms across her spine. James groaned and shuddered as her tongue slid against his, mapping out the contours of his mouth. She flicked her tongue along the roof of his mouth, then the backs of his teeth, then his upper lip. Next she sucked his lower lip into her mouth and bit it gently, scraping her teeth across it before she released it.

Heat unfurled low in his stomach, twisting and tightening his guts as it concentrated into a steady, dull ache in his groin. He could feel himself getting hard as Rose tightened her legs around his waist, pulling him in, in, in.

God, he wanted her. He wanted nothing more than to bury himself in her, body, mind, and soul. He wanted to make love with her, to hold her tightly as he pleasured her. He wanted to make her forget all about the heartbreak of the last twenty-four hours and to simply feel.

But after what she’d told him about makeup sex with Jimmy, would she even want to have makeup sex with him? He didn’t know, and so he would be perfectly satisfied to simply lose himself in her kisses for the rest of the afternoon. It would be enough to cradle her in his arms and let their breaths mingle in the same space as they shared kiss after kiss.

“You’re thinking too loud,” Rose mumbled into his mouth, reluctantly pulling away. Her lips were red and slightly swollen, her eyes dark and hooded. He recognized that expression, and his stomach clenched with anticipation.

“Sorry,” he said, leaning in to kiss her.

However, she pressed her hand to his chest. “Wait. Do you want to be doing this?”

“You can’t feel my interest in this?” he drawled, smirking. He wasn’t fully hard yet, but was hard enough that there was no way Rose couldn’t feel it. Even so, he pressed himself lazily into her.

“There’s a difference in you wanting it versus your body reacting to it,” Rose said with a shrug. “If you’re not into this…”

“I am,” he promised. After a moment’s hesitation, he decided to share with her what had been going on in his head. “I was just wondering if maybe you weren’t. What you said yesterday about makeup sex with Jimmy…”

He trailed off with a small shrug. Rose’s expression softened, and she leaned forward to press a gentle, brief kiss to his mouth.

“We used to have angry sex instead of talking,” she said. “You and I spent an hour last night talking things out and apologizing. You opened yourself up to me and made me feel comfortable to open myself to you. You let me know how I hurt you without raising your voice, calling me any rude names, or swearing at me. And you let me tell you how you hurt me without getting all defensive or dismissive about it.”

James’s blood began to boil as his hatred of Jimmy Stone was rekindled. He pushed it aside, however, to stay in this moment with Rose. Jimmy didn’t get to take up space between him and Rose, especially when they were sharing such intimacy together.

“That’s what I want from a relationship,” Rose concluded. “And now I would like to make love with my best friend because I want to make him feel good and show him how much I love him. And I want to forget about anything else because nothing else will ever be more important than him and me and what we share together.”

James’s chest tightened and he swore he had never and would never love anyone more than he loved Rose. He covered her lips in a frantic, hungry kiss, feeling as though he couldn’t get close enough to her. She moaned into his mouth and slipped her hands beneath his shirt, mapping out the planes of his stomach, his obliques, his chest. He shivered at her touch, nerves sparking.

He stuck one of his hands under her shirt, walking it up to her breast, while his other dipped into the front of her borrowed shorts. They were loose, giving him plenty of room to work. He groaned when his fingers met with her wet heat.

“Got hot and bothered watchin’ you,” she gasped as his fingers teased her, tracing long, slow lines through her. “Was gonna snog you on the ladder but figured that probably wouldn’t end well. Don’t really want you breaking your back falling off the ladder ‘cos I couldn’t keep my hands to myself.”

James snorted lightly. “I was getting distracted watching you too. I love seeing you in my clothes.”

“Good thing I like wearing your clothes. God.” She hissed when his fingers circled that wonderfully sensitive bundle of nerves. Her hips arched into him, urging him on.

He eagerly complied, keeping his touch light and unhurried, relishing the variety of sounds she made. From the low moans to sharp inhalations, the noises she let out tightened the coil in his belly. He was so hard and desperate to rub against something, or to shift aside their clothes and enter her. But he also wanted to continue pleasuring her, so he worked to ignore the demands of his body.

Rose, however, was as in tune with his body as he was, and must have sensed how tense he’d become. She stuck a hand down the front of his shorts and wrapped her fingers around his hard length. He groaned at the sensation, at the friction of her hand moving lazily up and down. Her rhythm was as slow as his, mirroring the motion of his fingers against her.

All the while, James kissed her. Their kisses grew clumsier as their breathing turned ragged. He gave up on kissing her and instead lavished attention to the side of her neck, concentrating his efforts on the sensitive skin beneath her ear and where her neck joined her shoulder.

“Rose, I want you,” he rasped, his belly clenching impatiently. “I want to be inside you. Let me make love to you. Let me make you feel good.”

She let out a whimper, her fingers tightening around him. He arched his hips greedily, urging her to continue even as he fumbled with the best way to shift her clothes.

Sensing his deliberation, she reluctantly took her hand out of his pants. She moved them to the edge of the vanity on either side of her hips.

“Here,” she panted.

She unhooked her legs from around his waist, then tightened her abdominal muscles and arms as she lifted her bum off the counter. Wasting no time, James hooked his fingers in the waistband of her shorts, grabbing them and her knickers. He slipped them down her hips and thighs in one smooth motion. She impatiently wiggled her legs, helping him remove her cumbersome clothes, before he finally got them free of her feet. He threw them to the floor, then made to drop to his knees in front of her.

“No,” she said, grabbing the front of his shirt to halt his movements.

He blinked. She loved oral, just as he liked giving it. “But…”

“Later.”

“Promise?” he asked with a pout.

She grinned. “You can go down on me for as long as you like later. But for now…” She cupped her hand around his erection through his shorts, stroking him slowly. He shuddered as his breath escaped him in a low groan. “I want you inside me. Right now.”

Carefully, she lowered his shorts to free his erection. He worked them all the way down his legs and kicked them off behind him. He next grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. Rose scrabbled with her shirt as well. She threw it to the floor, then reached behind herself to unclasp her bra.

The heat in James’s belly tightened as her breasts were revealed. In his (totally unbiased) opinion, they were the most beautiful pair of beasts in the world.

Now that they were both naked, it dawned on James that there were far comfier places to do this.

“Let’s move to a bed, love,” he said, even though it was so, so tempting to stay right as they were. It would be easy to step between Rose’s legs and push himself into her wet heat; it would feel incredible, being surrounded by her, making her moan, feeling her clenching and throbbing around him.

He shuddered violently as his need spiked, but Rose was already hopping down from the vanity countertop in all of her naked glory. He couldn’t help but catch her in his arms and kiss her. He hissed when his erection pressed to her hip. He grabbed her arse and pulled her into him.

“Y’know, standing-up sex is much more difficult and uncomfortable than countertop sex,” Rose drawled, though her words died on a gasp when he covered her breast with his mouth. He flicked his tongue against her nipple and scraped his teeth across it.

It became too awkward to keep his neck bent like that, so he instead replaced his mouth with his hand and moved his lips to the side of her neck.

“You are utterly irresistible,” he breathed, repositioning his hips so his erection was stimulating her as well. He flexed and arched his into her, ignoring that primal urge to enter her, to make hard and fast love with her.

“Counter’s right there,” she sighed, threading her fingers through his hair and hooking a leg around his waist.

Oh, God, that was the angle he needed. On his next forward grind, the tip of his cock slipped through her folds, teasing him with a hint of heightened pleasure. Fire blazed through him, a desperate, aching, burning heat as his body exploded with sensations.

He thought he would never again get to do this with her, yet here he was, mere seconds from joining with her in that most intimate way that belonged just to them. She was the only one he would ever share this with, the only one he wanted to share this with.

“Rose,” he gasped helplessly, grinding into her harder and faster.

Raw desire overwhelmed him, and he could hardly do anything but cling to her.

“Bed.”

Rose lowered her leg from around him, causing him to slip away from her. He grunted in displeasure as his cock was met with the cooler air of the en suite.

A small, soft hand slipped through his, pulling him into the bedroom. The smell of paint was all around them. Brushes and rollers and paint cans were strewn around the room, but in the center of the room was a beautiful, glorious, comfortable bed. It was covered in a protective cloth canvas, but it would be a simple matter to shift the canvas aside.

Rose, evidently, had the same idea. She grabbed the edge of the canvas and shoved it to the foot of the bed, leaving them enough space to crawl onto the mattress.

They moved in perfect synchronicity, with Rose settling on her back, legs fallen to the sides, and James hovering atop her, his hips cradled in hers.

Rose wasted no time; she took him in hand, lined him up, and guided him inside of herself. He couldn’t help the soft cry as he was surrounded by her. She echoed his moan, locking her legs around his hips and digging her nails into his shoulder blades.

James began to shake. Hot shivers pricked across his body, and he had the mortifying dread that he was about to come any second. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to think about anything other than how good it felt to be inside Rose, how safe and loved he felt, how relieved he was to be making love with the love of his life when, for a long, exhausting, harrowing day, he thought he’d lost her and broken this beautiful life they shared.

It was then that he realized his body had been telling him he was about to start crying. Hot tears slipped down his cheeks, before they were brushed away by gentle hands.

“James.” Rose caressed her thumbs beneath his eyelids, a silent request. He opened his eyes and saw that hers, too, were glistening with tears. “I love you. More than I can say. More than you’ll know. More than I thought I could ever love someone. You are my happy ending, the happy ending I never thought I’d have, and I want to spend the rest of my life loving you and laughing with you and crying with you.”

A choked sob bubbled up his throat and he spared a thought for how ridiculous they must look, lying on a bed in a paint-strewn room, connected as intimately as two people could physically be, and yet they were both crying.

“I love you, Rose,” he answered, voice raw. “Thank you for…” For what? For loving him and letting him love her? For letting him apologize and giving him an apology in return? For being patient, kind, and loving? For making him feel at home for the first time in a long, long time? “For everything.”

She brought his face closer to hers and brushed a ghost of a kiss to his cheeks overtop the tear tracks, then to his lips. She planted kiss after kiss to his lips, gently at first, then more frantic as he slid his arms under her shoulders to hold her closer. Their mouths moved greedily together, falling into a rhythm they each knew well as James began to move atop her.

Rose broke the kiss with a sigh, arching her hips into his. Their kisses grew more sporadic, with James concentrating his efforts on her neck and collarbone. She felt amazing, the slick drag of her tightening muscles around his cock sending frissons of pleasure across his entire body, head to toes.

He gathered her impossibly closer, burying his face into her neck as he breathed her in, her scent overpowering the smell of paint in the room. He was surrounded by her, by her warmth, her body, her love. With every thrust of himself into her, he was being consumed, giving himself willingly to her and receiving all of her in return.

Rose began trembling, clenching around him as her breathing hitched. Shifting his weight and balance, he took one of his arms away from her to slip his hand between their bodies to rub the place they were joined. Her back arched, thrusting into him as she squeezed him tighter, tighter, tighter…

She cried out his name, the sound full of pleasure and relief as she was swept away by the force of her orgasm. Shuddering and shaking, her nails dug hard into his spine as she clung to him. He could feel his own pleasure mounting, feel the urgency building within him as he quickened his pace.

His body was too small to contain the maelstrom brewing inside of him. His lungs constricted, leaving him panting raggedly at her shoulder as he moved within her. Rose had stopped pulsing around him, so he returned his arm to the mattress, bracing himself as he snapped his hips harder and faster, chasing his release.

Rose scraped her nails up and down his back, raising goosebumps across his skin and pulling a low groan from deep in his throat. Fuck, she felt incredible. He never wanted to leave this moment, yet he was desperate to reach his climax, to join her in that overpowering ecstasy.

Her lips were at his ear, her hot breath tickling it deliciously as she whispered, “I love you, James. My James. I love you.”

He cursed and cried out as the tension in his belly flared sharply, then rolled outwards, boiling his blood and leaving pleasure in its wake. He’d never felt so good and was sure nothing else would ever feel as amazing as this, despite the past four months proving to him that making love with Rose would always be addicting and overwhelming.

He was thoroughly exhausted when the tide receded and he slumped bonelessly into Rose. He could hardly catch his breath and he was sure his arms would never stop shaking.

“Don’t take this the wrong way,” Rose mumbled, sounding as worn out as he felt, “but if makeup sex with you is always going to be that intense, we’re gonna need to find things to argue about at least weekly.”

James snorted, then giggled, before he was full-on belly laughing. Rose was laughing just as hard beneath him, her shoulders shaking as she gasped for breath. His abdominals ached by the time he managed to pull himself together.

“Your hair is still a mess,” Rose said, running her fingers through it.

Shivers prickled across his scalp. He moaned and pressed closer.

“I think a shower is gonna be the only way to get all the paint out,” she continued.

“Mmm. I could use a bit of help. To make sure my hair is utterly paint-free.”

She grinned. “I s’pose I could be persuaded to join you. After all, I might’ve gotten paint in my hair and need someone to check it out for me.”

“See? I’m doing you a huge favor,” he said.

Rose pinched him, then sighed and melted into the mattress and pillows. “We probably ought to get more painting done before we shower though.”

“I dunno about you, but it would take an act of God to move me from this bed right now.”

At that moment, James’s phone began to trill with an incoming call. He grunted in annoyance, unsure where he’d left his phone, and figured whoever was calling couldn’t be more important than his post-coital cuddle with Rose.

“Aren’t you gonna get that?” she asked, trailing her nails lightly up and down his spine.

He huffed. “Unless God is calling, no.”

“It could be the vet,” Rose said as his phone continued to ring. “Didn’t you say Gollum could come home today or tomorrow?”

With a displeased groan, James pushed himself up to his forearms, then carefully rolled off of her. His muscles complained at the movement; his legs barely held his weight as he stumbled around the room, searching for his phone. The call had ended by the time he found it sitting precariously top of the canvas-covered nightstand. Rose had been right: it was the vet. He learned upon listening to the voicemail message that he could pick Gollum up any time that afternoon before six o’clock.

“Let’s shower then fetch him,” Rose suggested. “We got a lot done today and can finish up tomorrow, if that’s all right.”

James was sure he would be even sorer tomorrow, but he absolutely did not want to do any more painting today. He enthusiastically agreed, and then waggled his eyebrows and said, “Shower time?”

Rose rolled her eyes but a small smile crossed her lips. She shifted off of the bed, looking as stiff as he felt; hopefully the warm water would help loosen their muscles.

James should have known it would be impossible for their shared shower to be purely functional. As they washed themselves and helped each other scrub off stubborn flecks of paint, they found any excuse to stand closer than necessary. Their damp, soapy bodies rubbed together deliciously and James couldn’t help but trail wet kisses across her skin as his body thrummed with renewed desire. When Rose shampooed his hair and dug her nails deep into his scalp to scrape away all of the paint, James thought he was going to combust on the spot. All of his blood pulsed into his cock with dizzying intensity; by the time Rose rinsed the suds from his hair, he was grinding himself firmly into her hip.

“Again?” she asked with a smirk.

“Please,” he rasped. “I want you.”

“Shower sex requires more balance and strength than I currently have,” she said, sliding her palm down his belly to take him in hand. “But I can think of something else I can do with this.”

With that, she dropped to her knees before him and wasted no time in slotting her mouth over him. Pleasure sparked up his spine and goosebumps prickled across his skin despite standing beneath the warm spray of water. Her tongue drummed across his cock while her hand stroked the base of him.

She built him up with a steady rhythm, and James let himself be lost in her ministrations, for once unbothered that he wasn’t going to last very long. He couldn’t bring himself to care, not when the friction of her hand and the suction of her mouth felt so bloody good.

He grunted out a warning when the heat in his belly coiled in on itself. Smirking, she took her mouth off of him and pumped her hand harder and faster down his cock. She arched her chest closer, the overhead lights shimmering off her wet, flushed skin as the head of his cock brushed the swell of her breasts, and oh God, he was done for.

The tension unsnapped in a sharp wave of pleasure and relief that left him moaning and curling his toes into the wet, textured floor of his shower. He thrust into the sensations rocking through his body as her hand continued moving on him, drawing out his orgasm for as long as she could.

He cursed when his ears stopped roaring and his head stopped swimming. Rose was still crouched in front of him, evidence of his pleasure spattered across her breasts as she lazily stroked his softening cock. He shivered.

“Thanks,” he croaked a bit stupidly.

She grinned. “My pleasure.”

“Pretty sure the pleasure was all mine, actually.” He helped haul her to her feet, and he crashed his mouth to hers. Between kisses, he murmured, “That felt incredible. Thank you.”

“I love doing that to you,” she replied, sighing when he tilted her head back to kiss her neck.

“Looks like you got all covered in paint again,” he drawled, trailing his fingertips across her breasts.

“Really? That’s your line?” she snorted.

He pouted. “What’s wrong with my line? That was a brilliant line.”

She simply rolled her eyes, but another smile tugged at her lips. “That was a terrible line and so cheesy and so dorky.” Before he could splutter out a rebuttal, she kissed him and said, “But you’re my cheesy dork.”

His blood warmed and he hummed, his body overflowing with love and appreciation for her. He kissed her softly and whispered, “Since I got you messy, it’s only fair that I wash it all off.”

“Hmmm?”

James trailed his fingers up and down her sides, from her breasts to her hips, in long, slow strokes. Her nipples pebbled and tightened so invitingly, and he couldn’t keep himself from taking one into his mouth. She arched into his touch, fisting her fingers through his hair to hold him in place. As if he would ever want to move.

Time ceased to mean anything as he lavished attention to her breasts, letting his tongue and the spray of the shower rinse her chest clean. Her breathing turned ragged the longer he allowed his teeth and tongue to tease her nipples and the curve of her breasts. When his back and neck grew too sore to remain hunched as he was, he dropped to his knees before her and gave the same attention to her hips and lower belly.

She thrust closer to his touch, trying to get him where she wanted him, but he smiled to himself and grabbed her hips, halting their impatient movements.

“James,” she whined, tugging at his hair. “I didn’t make you wait.”

“As I recall, earlier you told me, and I quote, You can go down on me for as long as you like later. It’s later, isn’t it? And I am nowhere near satisfied yet.”

“James, please,” she begged, and fuck, if she didn’t know what that did to him.

He shivered and tried to continue kissing her hips and thighs, but he was desperate to taste her, to hear her sounds of pleasure.

“C’mere.” He tapped one of her legs, encouraging her to drape it over his shoulder. “I won’t let you fall.”

Rose obeyed, bracing her back on the shower wall for balance and leverage. She gripped his hair tightly with one hand while her other shot to the washcloth holder. Her knuckles went white from how hard she clung to it.

“Relax,” he breathed, planting barely-there kisses right above where he knew she wanted him.

She growled in frustration and arched into him. He caressed her leg, then finally lowered his mouth and lick a long, slow line through her folds. She cursed and squeezed his hair, before loosening her hold.

He feasted on her as though he were a starving man. He couldn’t get close enough, couldn’t taste enough of her. Her urgent moans spurred him on, and he redoubled his efforts.

“James. I’m gonna…”

He hummed into her, loving her sharp cry as she trembled apart around him. Her thighs shook and he made sure to brace himself to take on more of her weight in case she lost her balance. Rose dug her heel into his spine, pressing him closer to her as she sighed his name and a string of curses.

Many long moments later, Rose shakily unhooked her leg from his shoulder and urged him to his feet. He held her to him trailing his fingers up and down her spine as she worked to slow her breathing.

“I love you,” she mumbled, face buried in the side of his neck. “You are so good at that.”

He puffed up with pride. “You deserve nothing less. Besides, I love doing that to you. Though I’m miffed you wouldn’t let me go on for longer.”

As though to contradict him, their hot water turned lukewarm, then went suddenly frigid. James, who had his back to the spray, yelped and leapt out of the water’s path, knocking Rose into the wall.

“Christ that’s cold!”

Rose cackled and ruffled his wet hair before she reached around him and turned the water off. “See. It’s a good thing I didn’t let you carry on. I would’ve been furious if a jet of cold water interrupted that.”

James sighed, then grudgingly stepped away from Rose to exit the shower.

“Dunno about you, but I’m starving,” Rose said while they towel dried themselves.

“Worked up quite an appetite, did you?” he asked, winking.

“Nah, I think it’s just ‘cos it’s way past lunch time,” she replied sweetly.

When they were dried and dressed once more, they exited the bedroom and closed the door behind them, then released Merry and Pippin from the basement.

They inhaled a quick lunch of turkey sandwiches and sour cream and cheddar crisps, with half of a cupcake for dessert. As James cut the cupcake in half—horizontally between “happy” and “birthday”—he remembered the gift he’d had stashed away in his backpack all month long.

“Oh, bugger,” he muttered to himself, ignoring Rose’s look of confusion as he abruptly dropped the knife and rushed to the front door where his bag hung from a peg on the coat rack.

He rifled through it until he found the thin, rectangular velvet box. He had nearly decided on a thicker square box until he realized the box looked like it might hold a ring, and he hadn’t wanted to send mixed messages. If—when, he thought hopefully—he proposed to Rose, he wanted that to be the first and only time she thought a proposal was coming. He didn’t want to tease it in front of her without following through.

Necklace box in tow, he returned to Rose and held it out to her. “Happy birthday. I’ve been carrying it around all month to give to you whenever you told me it was your birthday. It slipped my mind last night.”

Rose’s cheeks turned a delightful shade of pink as she accepted the box from him with a mumbled, “Thanks,” and a brief kiss. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and rocked on his toes and heels as she took the lid off of the box.

“Oh, it’s beautiful,” she breathed, running her fingertips delicately across the silver chain and pendant. She looked up at him and smiled. “Thank you. I love it.”

He exhaled in relief; he hadn’t been sure what her response would be, since she had an aversion to gifts. But he’d seen the infinity heart design and hadn’t been able to resist.

Rose must have noticed his reaction, and she smiled sheepishly. “I’m trying to be better about accepting gifts. Especially since you enjoy giving them. I really love it, James. Thank you. Will you put it on me?”

She took the necklace out of the box and handed it to him. He draped it around her neck then clasped it, brushing a kiss to her nape to sign off on a job well done.

“You’re beautiful,” he murmured, unable to resist kissing her again.

She hummed and melted into him, resting her head on his shoulder. He leaned forward to press a kiss to her lips as she said, “Let’s finish lunch then we can collect Gollum.”

“I’d rather continue kissing you,” he countered, leaving kisses along the side of her neck.

“We can keep kissing when we get home,” she answered, though with how she threaded her fingers through his hair, she was in no rush to put an end to their activities either.

“Or… we can kiss now.”

Rose breathed out a laugh. “You should be a responsible pet owner. Let’s fetch Gollum, then when we get back, we can snog on the couch for the rest of the night.”

“Hmmm, you drive a hard bargain.” He planted a final kiss to the patch of skin right below her ear, enjoying her slight shudder, then pulled away to guide her to the kitchen and their shared, halved cupcake.

#ficandchips #doctorroseprompts #dwfic #doctor who #ten x rose #ten x rose au #james x rose #university au #romance #lemons #my fic #chemical reaction #catalysis series #chemical potential sequel

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