#but until then i suffer

[strange-lights-in-the-sky]

what if I made a side blog just for rote only having read the first three books ,,,, would that be so silly of me (I am going insane I need to put my art and thoughts somewhere)

#my copies of the rest of the series have finally arrived and I’m not ok #bc I still have to get thru next week (finals) AND THEN I CAN READ THEM #BUT UNTIL THEN I SUFFER #anyways I love these books and they’re the only thing I can draw rn <333 #but also like I need to avoid spoilers so I might just treat it like #a blog just to dump art and my reactions as I go until I’m finished with the series and then I’ll start interacting w all the other gay ppl #losing my marbles rn #rote #realm of the elderings #robin hobb #farseer triology

[the-martyrfication-of-the-matron]

Okay I’m struggling with starting off the tua s3 rewrite. Like I literally have no clue how to start because I want to do those little character intro scenes but they don’t translate well into writing, they just dont, and like even then I have no idea where to go from there.

I’m like using random word generators to try and make a sentence.

#once I get it started I’ll get the hang of it #but until then I suffer #i want to start off similarly to how s1e1 was done but like I can’t do that without splitting the team up a little #i might have to #just have one or two that don’t live at home anymore #idk man. random word generators. i swear

[uncanny-tranny]

Fat people deserve mobility aids, too. No matter if it's connected to their fatness or not, because having a mobility issue that is connected to one's fatness won't change that they're still fat and still have the issue at hand. Fat people don't deserve to "tough it out" because fatness should be this divine punishment doled out to those who "deserve" it. Fat disabled people deserve to have the peace of mind that they can exist in whatever way is most comfortable and accessible to them

#disability #ableism #ableism tw #fatphobia #fatphobia tw #also if it's an issue solved by weight loss why would you want them to suffer until the weight loss helps wouldn't that DISCOURAGE them? #because if i were suffering the entire time i sure as fuck wouldn't want to keep going for the ~idea~ of it's gonna pay off!!! #also even if they 'made themself disabled' by being fat or anything else that doesn't matter. they're still disabled. #there is no 'good' disabled and 'bad' disabled and you cannot sort people into those categories #for every 'bad' fat disabled person there are multiple 'good' fat disabled people but you can't tell them apart often actually! #because you would have to know the intimate details of their medical history and familial lineage and tbh if you're... #...being a piece of shit to a disabled person because you assume they're guilty until proven innocent i don't blame others for being... #...weary of you and not wanting to be around you. because you've already proven you can't handle the IDEA of complex disabled experience

[creekfiend]

I saw this on FB today and I wanna try and express something about it. Like, you know the curbcutter effect? Where when curbcuts are put in it benefits everyone (bicyclists, people with baby strollers etc) and not just disabled people?

There is also whatever the opposite of the curbcutter effect is. And this is that.

This isn't just anti-adhd/autism propaganda... this is anti-child propaganda.

Kids have developmentally appropriate ways that they need to move their bodies and express themselves and sitting perfectly still staring straight ahead is not natural or good for ANY CHILD.

Don't get me wrong, I was punished unduly as a kid for being neurodivergent (and other types of kid will ALSO be punished unduly for it... Black kids come to mind) and thus UNABLE to perform this -- but even the kids who ARE able to perform this type of behavior are not SERVED WELL by it. They don't benefit from it.

This is bad for everyone.

The idea that bc some kids may be capable of complying with unfair expectations, those expectations don't hurt them... is a dangerous idea. Compliance isn't thriving. Expectation of compliance isn't fair treatment.

#theres a lot of things lately that make me think of this where #people will act like theres this class of people not harmed by something #(laws undermining bodily autonomy come to mind!!!!!) #and its like -- no. the consequences will be worse for some people #but no one is ultimately served by the erosion of bodily autonomy like there is not a class of people who benefit from that #same with lack of right to privacy #there isnt a DEMOGRAPHIC of people who benefit from certain things #there are systems that do. and there may be a handful of individuals who benefit partially or FOR NOW #until those systems are turned against them #i think its important to remind people in certain privileged demographics that like #certain things do benefit them #and others DON'T #you may suffer less statistically but it doesnt benefit you! #its BAD SOCIETALLY.

[huachengsromcom]

People call Heaven Official’s Blessing / TGCF a slow burn but Hua Cheng is literally courting Xie Lian like they are DATING. Slow burn who??? They’re sleeping next to each other on straw mats and Xie Lian’s offering to cook him dinner and they’re bantering across THE HOME THEY SHARE like a bunch of desperate hussys

San Lang LEAVES XL WITH A KEEPSAKE OF THEIR TIME TOGETHER SLOW BURN WHOMST

They have A DATE in HC’s armoury where they HOLD HANDS and XL pets San Lang’s quivering sword I-

Hua Cheng basically throws himself at this man he’s like you want a sword?? All of them ?? You want ALL THE SWORDS?? Fuck it take the whole room THE WHOLE ROOM JUST COME VISIT I WILL CLEAN THEM FOR YOU

Like he isn’t the king of a whole realm with shit to do

And this is just the first half of the first book—again I ask the world SLOW BURN WHOMST

#this is half in jest #but #I know some people don’t count it as “real until they kiss but THIS is honestly so gay of them #it’s in the subtext it’s in everything THAT ISNT a kiss #it’s so queer #Hua Cheng is ALL IN XL is just too innocent to Grasp It #XL is saying “come round to my tiny shack whenever sleep on my mat with me BEST FRIEND I will be your home” and HC is SUFFERING #the armoury scene is favourite of the entire thing #I was like my brother in Christ HAVE YOU NO SHAME #and knew immediately I would love him forever #tgcf #heaven official's blessing #mxtx tgcf #hua cheng #xie lian #hualian #she’s being unhinged again

[sidhewrites]

I went to wondercon! I had a ton of fun with my friends and buying too many books which I then carried around for 10 hours but I also got to meet @drchucktingle, as well as get my copy of Straight signed and I wanted to show off.

And honestly we already knew it but man he is so sweet, he jumped up to take pictures with everyone who stopped by to get a book signed. They had Camp Damascus on sale at the booth, seriously go read it if you haven’t already. Chuck tingles horror is so cathartic and lets out so much anger and pain and hope and it’s so good man.

#selfree #wondercon #books #chuck tingle #tbh suffering until bury your gays comes out im so hype for it #I love old Hollywood and monster movies and everything that goes into it #500

[sugarxinim]

I promised myself I wouldn't draw supercorp 🙃

#i started watching and was in love with alex until lena showed up #uuugh #wtf her voice??? #i'm obsessed #why are they not a couple??!! hello??!! #god I can't believe I'm suffering in 2024 #i guess i did that to myself #my art #supercorp #lena luthor #kara danvers #supergirl

[lotus-pear]

whatever happens, please don’t break

#god not a fucking DAY goes by where i don’t think of that one interview and this quote #does anybody have it word for word? please? i’ll pay you #literally every single time i think about how kunikida as w character was MADE for dazai. specifically to share his suffering #i actually sob into my hands because that means they were both destined for tragedy together and the long dark road they will walk #will at least not be lonely. because they have each other. they are each other’s light in the darkness. #DO YOU UNDERSTAND #bro the fact that kunikida is painfully aware of the imperfection of the world and how he still continues to fight for his ideals #paralleling dazai who finds humanity beautiful but cannot become attached bc he feels alienated from emotion #THE WAY THEY COULD HELP EACH OTHER????? SICK SICK SICK I AM SICK #i love kunikidazai sm i wish more ppl could see the potential #but some of you aren’t ready for the sheer perfection of their dynamic #also i’ve noticed that i am only capable of drawing dazai properly when it’s with kunikida what’s up with that 💀 #and sorreyy i know their height difference isn’t THAT big but i didn’t realize until i was halfway into the coloring 😔💔 #osamu dazai #dazai osamu #kunikida doppo #doppo kunikida #kunikidazai #knkdz #kunizai #lotus draws

[galecstatic]

Chapter 10 of Red, White and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston

"henry giving his ring to alex as a symbol of family and alex giving his childhood house key to henry as a symbol of home"

"HENRY IS HIS HOME AND ALEX IS HIS FAMILY"

#FUCK LET'S SUFFER TOGETHER WHILE WE WAIT FOR THEM SHALL WE #FERAL ATM KNOWING IT'S LESS THAN 12 HOURS UNTIL THE MOVIE PREMIERES #I CAN'T DO THIS #red white and royal blue #firstprince #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #taylor zakhar perez #nicholas galitzine #rwrb film

[saturdaysky]

a little morning pick-me-up

-

A morning on the way to Baldur's Gate. The party booked themselves into an inn and enjoyed real beds, hot baths, and privacy for the first time since the Nautiloid.

Gale and Mayhew shared a room, of course. They were filled with the relief of surviving the shadows and the glow of finally getting together, so their private room was probably a blessing for the whole party, honestly.

-

This was some ascended anatomy practice! Referenced some great stock from @null-entity.

#some people speed run the galemance but i played it as the world's longest slow burn #act 1 was fuuull of uneven feelings and perceived unrequited feelings and slow-building respect #mayhew was immediately down bad & suffering after the weave scene. Plus Gale's lukewarm reaction to flirting felt like people-pleasing #gale slowly emerged from his depression hole much later and only then caught real feelings - but the orb put paid to acting on them #so in my game they simply had a very loaded laden-with-unspoken-feelings friendship until near the end of act 2 #they got like one (1) week of happiness before the horrors of act 3 hit. starting with Mayhew getting unwillingly astral tadpole'd #it's tragic and i love it #also: chubby gale. tumblr do you see my vision #mayhew sees my vision #please also appreciate mayhew's bed head and the too-big-for-gnomes dishware. i chuckled about those #my art #mayhew #gale dekarios #gnome tav #gale x tav #bg3 #baldur's gate 3

[lgbtlunaverse]

What kind of saber is baxia anyway?

I love my bloodthirsty princess of a cursed blade, and in my heart of hearts i am nothing but a sword nerd, so i've been extremely fascinated by Baxia and how we know frustratingly little about what she actually looks like!

I mean, look at bichen, right?

Bichen in the donghua:

Bichen in the drama:

They're clearly not exactly the same. The scabbards are different, and the guards have a different shape. But these are recognizably different iterations on one theme, right? Thin jian with a white grip silver guard, light blue tassel and silver mounting accents on the scabbard.

Now this is baxia in the donghua:

And baxia in the drama:

????????

THAT'S A COMPLTELY DIFFERENT WEAPON

it doesn't stop there either, the audio drama is kind enough to give us ANOTHER COMPLETELY DIFFERENT BAXIA

pretty! But how is that he same sword??

And when we go back to the novel, we get very little information on her appearance other than the fact that her blade is tinted red with all the blood she's absorbed. Which none of these designs incorporate.

This is not a dig on the designs itself, they're all quite gorgeous in their own right and i'm going to spend a while discussing all of them! Because isn't it fascinating how, since we know little about novel baxia beyond "saber" all of these designs ended up so different? What kinds of sabers are these, anyway?

So, a chinese aber, aka a "dao" (刀) just means a sword that has only one cutting side. As opposed to a jian, which has two.

You can see how that leaves a LOT of room for variaton.

I've actually seen some people get confused because Huaisang's saber in the untsmed is thin and quite straight, making it superficially resemble the jian more than drama!baxia, but it is still clearly a saber!

See? only one cutting blade!

This, to me looks a lot like a tang dynasty hengdao

credit to this blog for providing his image and being a great source for all this going forward.

TANGENT: during all this I found out the english wikipedia page for dao is WRONG! Ths is what they about the tang hengdao!

So that sounds like the hengdao was called that during the sui dynasty, but then, after that, started being called a peidao, right?

WRONG

I LOOKED AT THE SOURCE THEY USED AND IT SAYS THIS:

IT WAS CALLED THE PEIDOU UNTIL THE SUI DYNASTY, AT WHICH POINT IT WAS CALLED A HENGDAO. Which would carry over to the Tang dynasty. This was the source wikipedia linked! and it says something else than they say it does!

Anyone know how to edit a wikipedia article?

ANYWAY

BACK TO BAXIA

Since we're already at the drama, let's look at drama baxia: She's also straight! the general term for straight-backed saber is Zhibeidao, but that's a modern collector's term, and doesn't really say anything about which historical kind of saber baxia could be based on. Another meta i found on the drama nie sabers already went on some detail here.

I'm gonna expand on that a little: The kinds of historical straight-backed sabers we see resemble the hengdao a lot more than they do baxia. They don't go to their point as harsly as she does (she's basically a cleaver!) and they're all way skinnier.

No, my personal theory is that instead of being based on any kind of historical sword, drama!baxia is based on a Nandao.

I mean, come on, look at it!

Baxia!

The Nandao... isn't actually a historical sword. It was invented for Wushu forms. There's a really fascinating article about its conception, but that's why the swords in the images look a little thin and flimsy. Wushu swords are very flexible and light, they're dance props, not weapons to fight with. There are actual steel versions of Nandao, but they're recreations of the prop, not the other way around.

So That's one way in which Baxia differes from the Nandao: she's actually a real weapon. The other is that, as you can see above, the nandao has an S-shaped guard. Baxia doesn't. She's also much more elaborately decorated, of course. Because she's a princess.

Now: audio drama baxia!

This is much easier. with that flare at the tip?

Oh baby that's a niuweidao, all the way!

There are more sabers with that kind of curved handle, but the broad tip is really charcteristic of the niuweidao. The Niuweidao is also incredibly poplar in modern media, often portrayed as a historical sword, but it originated i nthe 19th century! And it was actually never used by the military!

That's right, the Niuweidao was pretty much exclusively a civilian weapon! That makes its use here anachronistic, but so is the nandao, and considering that the origin story of the Nie is that they use Dao intead of Jian because their ancestors were butchers, portraying them with a weapon historically reserved for rebels and common people instead of the imperial military is actually very on theme!

Finally, Donghua/Manhua baxia. These two designs are so similar I'm going to treat them as one and the same for now.

Unlike both previous baxias, The long handle makes it clear this baxia is a two-handed weapon, though Nie Mingjue is absolutely strong enough to wield her with one hand anyway. Normal rules don't count for cultivators.

Now, this is where things get tricky, because there are a lot of words for long two-handed sabers. And a lot of them are interchangable! This youtube video about the zhanmadao, one of the possible sabers this baxia could be based on, goes a little into just how confusing this can get. This kind of blade WAS actually in military use for many centuries, making it the most historically accurate of all the baxias. But because of that it also has several names and all of those names can also refer to different kinds of blades depending on what century we're in.

So here's our options: i'm going to dismiss the wodao and miandao, because these were explicitly based on japanese sword design, and as we can see manhua baxia has that very broad tip, so that won't work

(Example of a wodao. According to my sources Miaodao is really just the modern common term for the wodao, and the changdao, and certain kinds of zhanmadao... do you see how quickly this gets confusing?)

Next option: Zhanmadao.

Zhanmadao stands for "horse chopping saber" so... yeah they were anti-cavalry weapons. meant to be able to cut the legs and/or necks of horses. That definitely sounds like a weapon Nie Mingjue would wield. But if you watched that youtube video i linked above, you'll know the standardized Qing dinasty Zhanmadao looked very different from earlier versions. It was inspired by the japanese odachi, and more resembles the miandao than its ealrier heftier counteprarts.

Earlier Ming dynasty Zhanmadao on the other hand were... basically polearms. the great ming military blog spot, another wonderful source, says these are essentially a kind of podao/pudao (朴刀) which looked like this

Now that blade looks a lot like baxia, but the handle is honestly too long. Donghua!baxia straddles the line between sword an polearm a little, but while zhanmadao have been used to refer to both long-handled swords and polerarms, this was undeniably a polearm, not a sword.

If you want to know what researching this was like, I found a picture of this blade on pinterest-- labeled as a "two-handed scimitar"-- and the comment section was filled with people arguing about whether this was a Pudao, Wudao, Zhanmadao, Dadao, Guandao, or a japanese Nagita.

So... that's how it was going. This has kept me up until 2 AM multiple times.

However! Thanks to this article on the great ming military blog I found out there have historically been pudao blades with shorter handles!

Specifically, Ming dynasty military writer Cheng Ziyi created a modified version of the pudao to work with the Dan Fao Fa Xuan technixues-- aka technqiues for a two-handed saber, which would alter heavily influence Miaodao swordmanship-- thereby, as the article points out, essentially merging the cleaver-polearm type Zhanmadao with the later two-handed japanese-inspired design.

This is the illustration for the Wu Bei Yao Lue (武備要略) a Ming dynasty military manual

This blade shape in the illustration doesn't match Baxia exactly, but since it's a lengthened Pudao-like blade and we've seen above that those can match Donghua Baxia's shape, i'm gonna say that calling Baxia a Zhanmadao with a two-handed grip isn't all that innacurate!

However, because all of these terms are so intertwined, there are a dozen other things you could call her that would be about equally correct.

To show that, here's a lightning round of other potential Baxia candidates:

Dadao (大刀)

Which are generally one-handed and too short. However!

Another youtube video i found of someone training with a Zhanmadao that resembles baxia a little also calls it a "shuangshoudai dao" (雙手带 刀) shuangshou means two-handed, and while 雙手带 seems to refer to a longer handled weapon, when looking for a shuangshou dao or shuangshou dadao (双手大刀) we find a lot more baxia-resembling blades like here and here

I also found that, while the cleaver-like Dadao is strictly a product of the 20th centuy, since dadao just means big sword or big knife, it has been used to refer to loads of different weapons! Some people could've called the zhanmadao and pudao "dadao" during the Ming dynasty as well.

Another potential baxia candidate that mandarin mansion classifies as similar to the later dadao (though longer, as seen in the illustration below) is the "Kuanren Piandao"

Which piqued my interest because this diagram classifying different tpye of Dao:

Claims that a Kuanrenbiandao (diferent spelling, same sword) is the same as a modern day Zhanmadao.

(So once again, all of these terms are interchangable)

Another opton Is the Chuanmeidao/Chuanweidao (船尾刀) below you can see a diagram, based on the Qing dynasty green standard army regulation, of blades all officially classified as types of "pudao"

The top middle is the Kuanren Piandao, and bottom left is the Chuanweidao.

Both of these have a lot of baxia-like qualities.

So there you go! live action baxia is based on a Nandao, audio drama baxia is based on a Niuweidao, and Manhua/donghua baxia is some kind of two-handed Zhanmadao/Pudao/Dadao depending on how you want to look at it.

I'm honestly surprised no one has made the creative decision to portray Baxia as a Jiuhuandao, aka 9 ringed broadsword yet.

I mean look at it! Incredibly imposing. Would make for a great Baxia imo. (@ upcoming mdzs manga and mobile game: take notes!)

#mdzs #mdzs meta #nie mingjue #baxia #cql #the untamed #long post #I HAVE SO MANY TABS OPEN. FEEL MY SUFFERING #I understand that asking a gigantic region with thousands of years of rich history and many different subcultures #to have one standard naming convention is basically impossible #But could they do it anyway? for me? 🥺 #i also want to buy one of these... so bad #or even just a plastic trainer so i can practice the techniques #but i know that once i start buying swords i'm not gonna stop until my money runs out #Being a sword nerd is a very dangerous not phyisically but for your wallet

[muwitch]

you think you busted them? jokes on you

#bg3 #enver gortash #durgetash #gortash x durge #baldur's gate 3 #mu draws #dark urge #durge #teth the black #look residential clown is back that is me #perfect heist by blue stahli playing bass boosted #lord goretrash my beloved once I will know how zoo draw u properly until then I suffer in a special hell #ppl who got the reference I love y’all

[betashift]

STAR TREK MATTE PAINTINGS APPRECIATION VOYAGER — by Syd Dutton, Robert Stromberg, Eric Chauvin (Illusion Arts Inc.)

Zahl Colony — "Year of Hell" Ocampa — "Caretaker" USS Raven crash site — "The Raven" Ocampa City — "Caretaker" Access shaft (Ocampa) — "Caretaker" Martian City — "Lifesigns" Ocampa City — "Caretaker"

#from my previous post it seems people think the matte paintings were a TOS thing only? but all the old shows and movies up to voy had them!! #the obv difference being that these are all composites that include some animated and/or green screen elements but they're still pretty <3 #mattes #trekedit #voyager #star trek: voyager #voyageredit #startrekedit #tvedit #scifiedit #whenever voy and ds9 finally get a bluray remaster....that will fix me (until then I suffer. badly)

[smuby]

I am literally allergic to posting things normally here. Also kid Goku design by sporkks as per usual (hi sporkks if you see this)

#when the fixation is so bad you literally wake up to make content for it and dont eat until its actually painful #not a vent thing im suffering but im having a blast so idc #dbz #smub art #dragon ball #dbs #dbgt #son goku #trunks briefs #bra briefs #bulla briefs #bulma briefs #i know briefs isnt a canon last name but i like it too much. dr briefs name is either literally doctor briefs or briefs briefs #vegeta #vegebul #vegetabul #yamcha #dbz au #whis

[goldiecastelia]

WHERE ARE THE FANFICS!?!?!?!?!?!? FOR ALL THAT IS MOST SACRED, WHERE ARE THE FANFICS?!?!?!?!?!?! It could even be an alternative universe, but please make fanfics!

#I'm probably going to cry in the fetal position on the floor until a mariko x john comfort fanfic comes out #FOR SOME THINGS FICS WRITERS ARE QUICK NOW FOR A NEED EVERYONE IS GONE #It's a joke but I'm really desperate #I should write it myself but I'm scared to death to post something (I can only write fics related to couples' children #writeblr community #ao3 writer #ao3 fanfic #writing stuff #shogun #shogun 2024 #shogun fx #shōgun 2024 #fx shogun #shōgun fx #john blackthorne #john x mariko #toda mariko #lady mariko #mariko x blackthorne #I need a cute happy and cheerful fanfic of these two #The series is enough to bring suffering to everyone #cosmo jarvis #anna sawai #shōgun spoilers

[emeraldoodles]

Shigeo is asking Reigen for advice on asking out a special boy!

I really love @pearliegrimm fic "Sometimes That's Better". It's hilarious and I was literally laughing out loud while reading it. I hope to draw more comics from the fic (adding to my long list of WIPs).

This is a scene from the very first chapter, so if you enjoyed it go check out the fic!

#mob psycho 100 #mp100 #reigen arataka #serizawa kastuya #shigeo kageyama #serirei #pearliegrimm #comic #fanfic #fanfiction #idk why I put so much effort into the sign #I just really wanted to color a neon sign #Reigen being ADHD asfuck thinking about tomatoes #anyone catch the one punch man reference? #I enjoy drawing Mob suffer to much to be healthy #Shigeo not being the sharpest #but together with Teru they make one brain cell #once again a comic that was suppose to be more simple until I decided to ink it then color it sigh