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mistymark · 4 years

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rating nct based on what their tinder profiles would look like.

idea from @aqiaquas :) pls this is entirely a joke

taeil: 9/10. his profile is pretty authentic tbh, lists his favourite artists in his bio and his pics are nice. -1 point for having a brilliant music taste but choosing something like ‘rich girl’ as his anthem.

Johnny: 7/10. everything is a 10/10 - photos, song choice, conversation - except for his bio. I feel like he’d mention photography and coffee and it’s just a no from me (-3 points).

taeyong: 10/10 profile. I have no idea what would be in it but I just know it would be good. talks about himself in a way that doesn’t sound vain and sounds genuinely interested when texting. bad at replying though.

yuta: 5/10. undersells himself, really. the photos he has on his profile aren’t the best photos of him. they’re not bad just.... why? bio is pretty good, though. mentions anime. and winwin, probably. everyone he talks to asks if winwin is his ex.

ten: 8/10. doesn’t really care for it. just made it when his friends did. has the word ‘bitch’ somewhere in his bio. leaves you on read. most of his photos are really good pics of just him but the last pic is of his friends :)

kun: 4/10. chaotic. his friends definitely made it and his bio is just reviews they left of him like “yea pretty good guy - yangyang” and “I love you Mum - hendery”. got locked out of his account for a year.

doyoung: 4/10. has two photos and they were taken seconds apart. gives off good vibes though. has an ‘anthem’ that doesn’t make you cringe. takes at least a week to respond, though.

winwin: 8/10. all-round very decent profile. good range of pics. has a dirty pun that uses his name as the punchline.

jaehyun: 7/10. his profile has the bare minimum tbh. barely any bio, it’s just his location. and only like 3 pics. should be a 10 but -3 points for being so attractive it looks like he’d be a douche. or a catfish.

jungwoo: 9/10. all his pics are in different and exciting locations. the bio is a solid description of him and his hobbies. -1 point because he has a very explicit song as his anthem.

lucas: 8/10. all his photos are really good. he does include a shirtless pic. and has too many emojis in his bio. -1 point because he definitely has his height in there.

hendery: 9/10. honestly you think its a joke. half the photos of him look like memes. at least one deep-fried pic of him from when he was like 12. his bio is short and sweet. guaranteed good convo.

xiaojun: 8/10. his bio is a little pretentious, like a quote or philosophical rant or something. but still makes you wanna chat. the photos are hella attractive but -1 point for his first pic being him with a guitar.

mark: 4/10. his bio is one chunk of text and instead of a period he uses ‘ahaha’ at the end of every sentence. had one photo on his profile until his friends made him add more. has only matched with two people because he doesn’t like the swiping part.

renjun: 6/10. good profile but gives off “I like art and music. Let’s talk about it.” kinda vibes. wouldn’t actually have that in his bio, though. does have a passive aggressive comment targeting the friends that made him make it, despite the fact they’ll never see it.

jeno: 7/10. his profile is nice and simple. uses casual selfies as his photos. -1 point for having jaemin in half of them. -2 points because he’s probably a dry texter hsjdjfhd

jaemin: 9/10. his profile is aesthetic as fuck somehow? the colour of his outfit in the first pic matches the emojis in his bio. -1 point for not replying to any of his matches.

donghyuck: 3/10. his photos are either too model-like or memes. mentions that he has “good taste in memes” and probably something cliche like walks along the beach in his bio. never texts first but gets offended when his matches don’t text him.

yangyang: 8/10. a good mix of attractive and funny photos. bio is funny, too. but a kind of niche humour that only a few people would get. but it also means all his matches are good. -2 points because has too many pics of his friends that sometimes people ask about them and not him :(

chenle: 5/10. all his photos are basically the same, just with different hair colours. has his own iconic quote as part of his bio but no one really gets it. still worth the match, though.

jisung: 1/10. says his friends made him make it. “I think I’m 6′ idk” is in his bio. and something about dance. doesn’t even swipe, just has a profile.

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shijakbuteoda · 4 years

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messy nct / wayv bios pt.3

pt.1 & pt.2

follow me on twt @ YEONIGOTCHI or i’ll... -?/!:@: cry maybe :)

johnny:

#USER: wdym am i single ??? NO . johnny suh is my .. b̴̢͖͔͉̪͒̐̈͋ì̶͍̭̠̺̈́̂̊g̶͇̮̗͖̟̱͙̩̔ͅ ̴͕̮̘̯͉̞͐̍̀̈́̅́͒̃͘͠t̷̯͈͙̪̞̹̜͚̐́̒̍̽̇̂̅͜͝ị̵̧͚̳̳̳̥̟͈̈́͆̽͂d̷̡͇̘͉͌d̷̖͙̤̯̰͙́̌̆̕͜͝͝͝ͅͅí̴͔̪̜̯̝̗͚̾̅͂̓́̌͊̒̎͜e̷͕̘͖̺̘̞̩̼͆ ̷̛̼̠̈́͒́̾͑͑̊͘g̵̓̿͋͌͌͗͆̐͘ͅo̵̰̰͕̺̭̟̤̖̪̽͝t̶͙̦̬̯̙̠̥̥͖̝̓͂̀̀͒͐̈́̕h̷̡̨͇̪̫͐̚ ̴̢̱̼̻̞̐͛g̸̡͉̯̣̭̹̣̯͚̹͆̎̎͛͛̈͝f̵̛̣̂͂ get outta here >:(

yuta:

#YUTAAA: no present could ever have the ability to replace the joy that i feel when i’m merely in the presence of mark lee... live with that in mind when u buy me a gift :D

kun:

USER: wikihow ; how to give qian kun the world and more ??

jaehyun:

pulled into #JAEHYUN’s lane at a hundred and five baby 😎

sicheng:

#WINWIN: you guys are saying you are what you eat??-?/!/ hmmm i don’t remember eating a dance, rap & vocal icon for breakfast ??-?/

USER: my schedule consists of - waking up, winwinning, sleeping & repeat .

jungwoo:

[ matching bio w/ someone who is hyuck biased ]

#WOO: hi if ure reading this i think u r veeeeery pretty <3 @ username

yukhei:

USER: xuxi or me, he said .... sigh .. sometimes i can still hear the sound of his voice :/

hendery:

#KUNHANG: im a bad bitch ... i was gna say u can’t kill me but u can idm 😳👍🏼

xiaojun:

#USER: hey hey hey hey ... shut up >:( dejun is takin a nap in my pocket !! don’t disturb him !!

renjun:

#REND: damn this bitch never stops tweeting about me ... as they should :)

jeno:

WARNING : this user is a fool for #JENO, and rightfully so.

haechan:

[ matching bio w/ someone who is jwoo biased ]

#HYUCK: @ username ... uhh suddenly i am jared, 19 😸👍🏼

#HAECH: here for a good time, and also a long time bc i’m ur fullsun and i’m not going anywhere !!

jaemin:

#JAEMS: i’m ur catboy bf... nyaaaa *pukes on ur carpet* 😼

shotaro:

#TARO: give me like 12 months and i can rid of my government assigned “uwu soft boy” persona in favour of readapting my thirst trapping, tiktok boy agenda 😎

sungchan:

#SUNGCHANNIE: lyrics that speak to me??? hmm, probably “let’s play forever, i just wanna be your dog [BARK BARK BARK BARK]” ... truly, words of wisdom .

chenle:

chenle reacted with 🔥 to: chenle is more than just his laugh and wealth

jisung:

SUNGIE: im an alt kid . i wreak havoc . i Will take over and enforce my controversial beliefs : this being “chenle best boy” thanku for ur time . ALSO ACAB N BLM this is a safe space for !! lgbtq+ n the poc community !!!-!-!/&/&&/

#USER: jisung is 18 international age and has accomplished more than i ever would in my lifetime .... jisung it boy jisung ace

LIKE / REBLOG IF YOU USE !!

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k-llama-llama · 4 years

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Impress

SuperM/WayV AU: 8th member

YinYin x SuperM/WayV/NCT

Yinnie gets up to trouble with the dreamies, and reveals some deeper problems of her own.

A/N:ALSO FYI check out my patreon (patreon.com/kllamallama for exclusive posts!)

Requests are Open…and your feedback is still super important to me.

Masterlist and other Follow Me links in bio!

“Noona! We didn’t know you were here.”

YinYin paused, looking into the practice room. She’d been on her way to the gym, but some excited voices stopped her.

“Jisung?” She smiled when she saw him waving. “Are you guys practicing?”

She turned to walk into the room, finding the rest of NCT Dream inside.

“Just kind of messing around, to be honest.” Haechan told her. “You?”

She dropped her gym bag on the ground. “Just going to the gym.”

“By yourself?”

“I’m currently trying not to murder Lucas, so I figured I’d ditch him.” She walked up behind Renjun, messing up his hair with her hand.

“Why are you mad at Lucas?” He asked in Chinese.

“Yeah,” Chenle laughed. “Did he break into the bathroom again?”

“No, he -”

“Korean please.” Jisung begged.

“Just for you baby.” YinYin winked. “So I take it I’m not interrupting?”

“Not at all.” Jeno promised. “Jisung is trying to teach us how to do a back flip. We could do with a real teacher.”

“Yah, you said I was doing a good job.”

“But we need a master.” They all looked to Yinnie.

She blinked. “What? That’s me?”

“Yes please.” Renjun asked.

YinYin rolled her eyes. She really should go to the gym, as she shouldn’t be doing any sort of exercise without a proper warm up, but she could never resist a chance to fool around and impress the dreamies.

“Just let me stretch.” She joked, pulling her sweater over her head, leaving her in her tight black leggings and matching long sleeve crop top.

She bent down to touch her toes.

They just watched her.

“Why aren’t you guys stretching?”

“Right, we’re going!”

They all followed her through her stretching routine, and they took the chance to chat. YinYin moved smoothly into the splits, and they all did their best imitation of her.

“Were you just born doing this or something?” Haechan winced.

“Seriously, it’s like it doesn’t even take effort for you.” Jeno told her.

Yinnie reached forward to touch her toes. “I was in gymnastics since I was three years old. I guess I do find it kind of easy.”

She rolled over so she was just lying on the ground, letting her muscles relax for a minute. Around her, the boys melted to the floor.

“You know so many cool tricks.” Jisung sighed. “Can you do the thing where you put your leg over your head?”

“I thought you wanted me to do a backflip?”

“After. Show us the trick.”

Yinnie rolled her eyes and stood. She hadn’t really stretched enough for the move they wanted, but it should be fine. Besides, she’d just have to do it once and then she could move on to something easier.

“Fine, watch and dream, children.”

“Isn’t it watch and learn?” Haechan asked.

“We can’t do it.” Renjun answered for her. “Let’s go Yinnie!”

She took a deep breath and kicked her leg up behind her, grabbing it with one arm. The aim of the move, which was common in Chinese dance, as to make her legs a straight line. But it put a lot of strain on her back, which meant she had to transition slowly into the split.

“Do you normally do it this slowly?” Chenle asked.

“Uh, I can go faster.” She lifted her leg straight up, feeling the painful pinch in her lower back.

“Wow, that looks so cool!” Jeno exclaimed. “I don’t know how you do that.”

Yinnie dropped her leg, trying to keep a neutral expression as her back screamed in protest at the movement.

“Let’s try the backflip.” She grimaced.

“Okay, what’s first!”

An hour later, YinYin hobbled out of the practice room. She’d made an excuse about needing to get to the gym before it got busy, but in reality she wasn’t sure how much longer she’d last. Her back was still hurting with every movement, and she couldn’t afford to let it get worse. She just needed to get home and put some heat on it, and hopefully it would feel better.

“Noona, you forgot your-”

She turned as Jisung excited the studio, holding her sweater in his hand.

“Noona?” He tilted his head, taking in her posture. She had one hand on the wall to support her weight as she tried to work up the energy to walk down the stairs and call a cab.

“Thanks, Jisung.” She forced a smile. “It’s my favourite sweater.”

“Are you okay?” He hurried over, ignoring her feigned response. “Did you hurt yourself?”

“Of course not, I’m just a bit...sore.”

He narrowed his eyes. “I’ve never seen you get sore after a practice, especially one as lame as that.”

“Well, I am.” She took the sweater and tried to take a step. Her back seized, and she stumbled a little. Her hand went right to her spine as she breathed in a sharp breath.

“Is it your back?” He reached out, grabbing her elbow. Despite how much she refused to admit it, it was nice to shift a bit of her weight onto him.

“It’s just....” She sighed. “I didn’t stretch enough. It’ll be fine with some rest.”

“I asked you to do the trick, and now you’re hurt.” He frowned. “Do you want me to call a doctor? Or Kun?”

“I’m fine, Jisung.” She promised. “I just need to get home and rest.”

“I’ll help you down to get a cab.” He shouldered her gym bag and wrapped his arm around her waist, helping her down the steps.

“Thanks, Jisung.” She squeezed his shoulder. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Call someone else.” He teased.

“No, I...ah-” She hissed as they descended the last step. “I’m kind of keeping this on the down-low. I’ve been doing some physical therapy to help it, and it really isn’t that bad.”

“Was it...” He swallowed. “Did it come from what happened on Weekly Idol? When they bent your leg?”

YinYin was silent for a moment, before she decided to answer. “I think so. My therapist thinks that it was a microfracture that never got properly healed, but it doesn’t bother me all of the time.”

They stepped through the doors of the building and outside.

“You promise you’re okay?” Jisung asked as he waved down a taxi.

“I promise.” She smiled at him. “Besides, you know me. I’m too tough to let something like this get me down.”

“Be careful, Noona.” A cab pulled up next to them. “But I know you’re a badass.”

“You know it.” She winked, letting him lower her into the cab. “Work hard, Jisung.”

“Rest hard, Noona.”

YinYin smiled as the cab pulled away, watching through the window as Jisung disappeared back into the building.

The second she was certain her was out of frame, she let the pain return to her face.

“Are you alright, miss?” The cab driver asked.

She shrugged. “I hope so.”

#nct #nct 127 #nct dream #nct au #nct imagines #requests open #au #kpop #imagines #imagine #kpop au #kpop imagines #kpop imagine #jisung #jeno #chenle #renjun #haechan #mark #jaemin

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danishmiilk · 3 years

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if your moots were fanfics, what would they be? :p

ANON! i’ve been wanting to do this for the lONgest time (two days) so i’m soooo happy to have received this LMAO even though,,, this may NOT be accurate but im just gonig to do this randomly to the best of my ability

it’s very long, so more under the cut

@lebrookestore || taeyong + bookshop!au. so basically taeyong works at this bookshop and shes always going in to flip through books and such because she can’t afford to buy them and taeyong’s supposed to chase her away but just doesn’t have the heart to and one day she really just goes up and thanks him and hes like no problem and its usually quite empty so the next times she goes to said bookshop taeyong will go and sit with her to read the books and they talk and like wow they like the same shit! so then they Fall In Love wow

@hannie-dul-set || jaemin + definitely fluff. so basically her best friend (me! IM SORRY ALLEX BYE) and her best friend’s boyfriend (SICHENG! IM NOT SORRY ALLEX BYE) decided that their best friends weren’t getting like enough DATES so then they dragged them out on a double date (only for her and jaemin it was a bLIND date). it was at the dog cafe and the moment me and sicheng got there we just left them and ran away and theyd already bought like food so they decided to just stay and it was awkward for a bit but then like, jaemin was so good with dogs and hot damn. then yall exchange numbers and by the time yall get out of the cafe you see me and sicheng across the street using binoculars to spy on yall.

@seeing-dreams || chenle + def fluff, highschool!au. i feel like it’d be the secret admirer letter thing, which i think you already know what i mean? like chenle’s your crush bc (tbh he’e everyone’s) hes so hot and hes part of the basketball team and he also sits with you in bio and also at the same time you’ve been getting notes taped to the underside of your table in bio, and its like 10 or so letters before you get the last one asking you on a date (and leaving their number!! so if you want to date then call!!) and so youve alr fallen for this guy’s diction and you call the number and chenle’s phone rings. he winKS at you and youre like oH MY GOD

@floweringtheflowers || mark + YO IM SORRY BUT ISN’T YOUR WRITING ACC LIKE NEOSCULPTURES A SMUT BLOG I VAGUELY REMEMBER YOU SAYING THAT OR SUMN SO + pwp LMAO IM SORRY- and like obviously i don’t read those but like yeah take it take it away you just give me very strong pwp vibes bye

@moonlightjeno || jeno + arranged marriage!au, royalty!au, one sided etl!au. MHM SO BASICALLY YOURE A PRINCESS AND JENO IS A PRINCE AND THE KING AND QUEEN OF JENO’S COUNTRY (cough doyoung and his wife) dECIDE THAT OK TREATY so then you and jeno have to get married and like bc were such nice people we decide that okay, yall get married for oNE YEAR if really cannot then like fine,, yall can divorce. so yall just like try to tide it out for a year right but you need to fake in the eyes of the public and you hate jeno but hes just trying to make this more bearable for the two of you and one day yall have an argument and jeno goes like “I JUST REALLY wANT TO KISS YOU, OKAY?” *squeal* and youre like whatthefuck and then, like, you know what? you jsut pretend that didn’t happen but you eventually agree to just be cordial and friendly and become friends, and you know jeno’s in love with you but you try to not make it awkward and somewhere along the way you fall in love *clasps hands together with a huge sigh* deserve.

@sehunniepot || (i want to write this alr) yuta + hogwarts!au, etl!au, HOUSE RIVALRY!AU BC THOSE ARE SUPERIOR. yuta’s definitely a gryffindor so you can be a slytherin since you never tOLD me. so so anyway youve hated each other from day one because of some stupid misunderstanding of him purposely tripping you in the train and then youre sorted into slytherin and him in gryffindor and the next four years are pranks and sneers and insults and glares. then the yule ball comes up, and because the hogwarts teachers are so JUMPY you have a dancing lesson with randomly assigned partners and you get yuta and AAAA “boys, put your hand on the girl’s waist.” and youre glaring daggers but yuta does it anyway with that cocky grin and you hold hands and your hand’s on his shoulder and are his ears red, or is that just your imagination?? then yall just tease each other the entire dancing lesson and when you get back to your dorm best friend!doyoung’s all like “why was nakamoto blushing-” and you’re like “nothing.” then then YOU REALISE YOU CANT STOP THINKING OF HIS HAND ON YOUR WAIST AND DURING THE NEXT DANCE LESSON YOU NATURALLY GRAVITATE TOWARD EACH OTHER AND DOYOUNG’S LIKE ?? OKAY THEN ILL JUST GO DANCE QITH SOMEONE ELSE?? then the teachers (who know of your stupid rivalry) are like: okay then miss l/n and mr nakamoto if you’ve already paired up. OH THEN A FEW WEEKS LATER HE ASKS YOU TO THE BALL UNDER THE GUISE THAT “YOU ACTUALYL DANCE WELL” AND YOURE LIKE “YOURE NOT TOO BAD YOURSELF” but its all, ofc, a pretense and then at the ball you all (having alr realised you like each other), confess, and promptly kiss under the shining ice stalactites magically hung from the trees in the grounds of hogwarts. (OH MY GOD FUCK IM WRITING THIS)

@doyounged || doyoung + fluff, def + i think high school sweethearts!au so this is the really fluffy oneshots where like youre super shy!! like its pretyt obvious you have crushes on each other but like first relationship or wtv and you jsut brush fingers and BLUSH and put your arm around each other and BLUSH and cheek kiss and BLUSH and you get my point? yeah yeah that’s the whole au

@moonbeamsung || jisung + fluff af + best freinds to lovers!au the only thing i can think of is like cute sleepovers and the sleeptalking thing, i’ve written something like that for you i thiNK??

@orange-nimon-cross || cai xukun + angst. just pure angst. im not even kidding the angst is so bad oh my god- probably hurt-comfort. like xukun’s your emotional rock and hes jsut so,,, ROCK AND HES ALW THERE FOR YOU AND KAJOFSDF A HUG SOLVES ALL and something like that you get my point, yes??

@rouiyan || hyuck + uhm, ice hockey player hyuck. like i think you did one with jeno or something but like idk why does the concept suit your vibe so muCH?? this one bc hyuck is playful it’d be like you’re dragged to the matches bc jeno’s your best friend but you couldnt give a flying fuck about ice hockey and his annoying teammate (hyuck.) keeps flirting with you and like one day you ask him straight up why are you flirting with me and hyuck’s immediately apologetic like shit did it make you uncomfy ill stop and youre like hes,,, a nice guy and then yall bond over like post-match meals which jeno starts dragging yall all to and then yeah sicheng and ten (same hockey team) help hyuck plan a confession and he confesses at the pizza shop.

@radiorenjun || renjun + angst, but with a happy ending if i feel like it- oh hold on maybe not angst ill save you the heartbreak. def artist!renjun, not even going to think about it, and kind of supernatural/soulmate? like he has dreams of a mystery girl every night and that’s the inspo for all his paintings, and he tries selling them to an art gallery and youre the curator of said art gallery adn youre liek “thats so beautiful, but why is it always the back view of the girl?” and renjun looks up from his paintings to explain and he sees you and literally screams because he’s never seen the mystery girl’s face but HE KNOWS its you. it HAS to be. so the two of you try figuring out the stupid phenomenon and who knows, maybe it’s just fate’s way of letting the two of you come together! yall become a thing YAY

--- once again, thank you anon for this ask! i really enjoyed doing this and like you know what?? i may write some of these aus someday. definitely the yuta one. someday.

#moots!#anon #asks #mention games

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