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#doodle page of me trying to make a persona i like
catfir · 3 months
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unjcorn persona unicorn persona unicorn persona
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weebsinstash · 3 months
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Now that I saw that doodle Vox made again, I'm just wondering how tf he knew Alastor has hooves
Also noticed that he was a lil fixated on Al's ass in that same doodle so there's that :>
I literally searched the Hazbin wiki for the source and couldn't find it but I've seen multiple people posting some screenshot of some website that says, Velvette previously stated Vox had an Alastor body pillow, and I don't know if that's an old Voxtagram post or more recent but it's been living in my head rent free ever since
Like there have been so many Viv streams and q&a's that have mildly spoiled things or mentioned facts that have since become non canon so I'm not sure what to listen to anymore but dude, reading the wiki of all the amalgamated facts is A TRIP. Vox is Actually Totally Correct: despite Alastor having his gentlemanly persona and some weird "serial killer moral code, like dexter", he canonically has awful oral hygiene and both Vivzie and... Fautisse? Have mentioned this. His demon form has black gums. Vivzie said he "probably doesn't prioritize oral hygiene" and also probably wasn't a cannibal in life so that's literally a new hobby he picked up in death so also um. THE SECOND THIS MAN HAD FREE REIGN AND THERE WAS NO RULE OF LAW OR CONSEQUENCES HE DECIDED TO START EATING PEOPLE SO LET THAT SINK IN.
You start reading Alastor's wiki page and it makes it pretty clear he's like DERANGED, hypocritical, he's like borderline a megalomaniac? It's all hidden behind this, persona, this wall he puts up, his well put together demeanor that allegedly never cracks, but underneath his showmanship he's a haughty, insecure, judgy, gossipy, genuine FREAK who responds with insults and violence whenever he can who relishes in trolling people and scaring them, literally enjoys knowing when he's making people uncomfortable
I have so many conflicting feelings but like PRETTY SURE HIS VERSE IN THE FINALE WAS A VILLAIN SONG, HE'S LITERALLY SINGING ABOUT BEING PISSED AND WANTING TO RETALIATE BECAUSE HE'S BEING FORCED TO DO STUFF HE DOESN'T WANT TO
THUS
I AM CONVINCED VOX IS JUST A BOTTOM AND A SLUT WHO THINKS ALASTOR IS JUST REALLY COOL AND HAS A ONE SIDED PATHETIC BOY CRUSH
Bro the sound I fucking made when his wiki trivia says he's been described as "painfully white, like phlegm in the back of your throat white" NO DONT DO MY TV MAN LIKE THIS 😭🤣
Anyways, you've probably seen the posts but for someone who claims to be so hip and modern, Vox goes out of his way to dress similarly to Alastor. The coat with lapels in the front and a tail in the back, a bow tie with a cravat, cuffed sleeves, intentionally or not the color contrast of Vox's hands resembles Alastor's and Vox CAN customize his body...
He's just. I just completely forget sometimes that Alastor literally called him OLD PAL in episode 3 and yes he was obviously saying it to talk down to him but like ALASTOR DID ACKNOWLEDGE HISTORY BETWEEN THEM, and also oh wait what's this, Vivzie has confirmed Vox and the Vees are major antagonists of Season 2 and that Vox and Alastor's history is going to be expanded upon so.... radiostatic shippers stay winning ha ha
I read a post that I meant to reblog that was something like "Vox is actually an incredibly cunning charismatic manipulative businessman who is a legitimate threat and we see this for all of 5 minutes and the second Alastor is mentioned he starts completely coming apart" and it's SO TRUE, he can be ur angel or ur devil. He's a legitimately OP threat and he's also A PATHETIC SAD FAILHUSBAND. Give me Vox who's efficiently marketing more hypnosis equipment to substantially grow his own wealth and manipulating his shareholders and then he's going back to his computer room with some popcorn and kicking his little feeties as he watches his darling and Alastor on like 30 different monitors. Give me Vox who can know the INSTANT someone is trying to go behind his back and double cross him because he has mass surveillance all over the city and he's using his endless resources to develop high end 3d printers to make posable figures of his crush and Alastor.
Give me Vox who loses his cool and insults you to your face and you two get into a huge argument and maybe Velvette and Valentino lash out at you in defense of him and he's going to his room and crying from frustration into his body pillows totally not plural, totally not ones of you and Alastor and calling himself a stupid idiot because he hurt your feelings and then spends the next like week SUFFOCATINGLY showing up almost every single place you are and embarrassing himself as he tries to bond with you and prove to you what CLEARLY AWESOME boyfriend material he is
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zushimart · 1 year
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the feeling scara x gn!reader modern au, fluff, no warnings, 504 words
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scara’s working on emotional regulation with his therapist. he’s got a couple of tools under his belt that he knows how to use when he’s in a pinch –– like if he’s on the verge of crying in public or if he experiences an anger so big the color red consumes him. this feeling’s new, though, and when he attacks it with his tools… nothing seems to happen. 
it’s nine pm in the wintertime with the sun having set hours ago. washed and perfumed, he cozies up to the radiator by his desk. still-damp hair, a cold nose, and perpetually icy hands make him reach for a sweater to pull over the rest of his comfy clothes. scara stretches big like a cat and settles a hand over his notebook. most recently, he’s taken to journaling. 
he doodles as he waits for the words to come to him. blue ink flowers against a new, white page until the start of another petal turns into a letter. over and over, he writes. again and again, i think of them even if i don’t want to. he bites the end of his pen, leaning back in his seat and curling up with his knees pressed against his chest. he’s contemplating. and then he’s scribbling something else. i don’t dislike it. actually, i like it. like a song on repeat. and then he doodles you. 
it’s a bad drawing. you’ve got stubby legs and arms and a pair of dots for eyes. you’re smiling. he draws himself beside you, penning this mini-scara with a frown to match. when he’s done, he catches that new feeling swelling in his stomach, pushing up against his heart. it’s warm and glowy like the embers of a fire. he bites his lip, trying to maintain a level head, but he can’t bite back the laugh that bubbles up his throat. 
“i’ve lost it,” he mumbles to himself. “i’ve finally lost it.” 
maybe, if you’d caught him just a year prior and infected him with the same delirium, he would’ve pulled the feeling out of himself like a weed. he’s different now. he entertains the thoughts of you. he draws hearts around your head and lines the margins of the page with your name. he’s a lovesick schoolgirl. 
was he going to tell you? he blushes at the thought. scara pinches his wrist, embarrassed by his own embarrassment. no, you’d have to chase him. around you, he’s curt and cool and a little mean. he can’t shatter the persona just yet with a messy confession. 
oh gosh, because if he did… his face soured. your inflated ego would kill him. an ugly, smug smile marring your pretty face –– the glory of having the famed feral kitty kuni wrapped around your finger… “couldn’t help it, could you? loving me,” you’d tease, your confidence the size of childe’s. intolerable. charming. 
smiling to himself in the lamplight, he chews on the end of his pen. 
i like the feeling… i want to keep it. if they’ll let me.
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zaacoy · 10 months
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Additionally while I'm here I want to give a quick update on how this account is going to be operating from now on!
This is supposed to be my doodle silly account, I have completely failed to treat it as such but that's what I want to make it. Going forward I think I'm going to try to be less formal here and more open, uploading things as I draw them without worrying about there being "enough" content or the content "being good enough". Still going to be doing sketch pages and comics from time to time because I think those are fun but also just posting one off sketches because I feel like it. Also!!!! More personal stuff!! Freenoodles and Tang still fill my entire heart and soul but I've recently had fun redesigning old ocs, creating stuff in minecraft and animal crossing, making little crafts (some of which are lmk related, some of which aren't), making a bunch of lore for this one mc persona on an smp I play ON TOP of wanting to redesign my main sona again. This probably still will be an lmk centric account but I'd like to have a place to put that other stuff too, so I'll be putting it here on my silly doodle account from now on :3 Also I might just? talk? on here? If there's a comment I really want to make I might just start throwing them into the void idk I want to start voicing my thoughts more but twt scary lol
mmr TLDR: this is a doodle account!! Also an account for me to be silly on and do whatever I want!! So I'm finally going to treat it that way, or at least try to ehe- Twt is my rendered+animated+nice sketches account this is the one where I go bonkers on heeheehoo
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evesoup · 4 months
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What is up home slices?
Been a bit. My New Years resolution for 2024 is to be more active and do more art. I haven't been too active because 2023 kinda kicked my booty cheeks and shawty was mentally in the shitter. But, enough of that. I'll make 2024 my year. I plan to try and be more active. With that being said, I'm polishing my blog and changing some shid.
As you see, I changed my name again. I'm gonna recreate my persona a bit on Tumblr. I changed my username to "eviesoup" and for now on like to be referred to as "Eve" or "Evie". So moots, followers and future followers, is ya boi
My page looks like doodoo. Still trying to figure out what theme I want I'm so unorganized lmfao
I'm gonna keep my art blog too @queenbordeaux for my nicer art and post more doodles and shi on this blog
I'm still very into bsd but would love to expand on other things I love too as well. Expect more gaming stuff and memes from me lol. But I'm still super obsessed with bsd
Everyone tries the soup
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casspurrjoybell-31 · 5 months
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The Consort - Chapter 32 - Part 1
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*Warning Adult Content*
Finn
Kelly's adoring gaze follows Fiona as she bustles around the kitchen.
A strand of her red hair slips out of its messy bun while she bends over to pick up an unused napkin from the floor.
Her cheeks are stained a beautiful pink, the last hour of cleaning now wearing on her energy.
My best friend mindlessly twirls his pen through his fingers, a makeshift drumstick to add to his musical persona.
His eyes never leave her, though.
When she bends down a second time, he reaches over and gives her a playful smack on the ass.
Fiona huffs and twirls around to face him.
"I gave you a pass on chores so you and Finn could study together for mid-terms," she scolds.
Kelly smirks and leans back, casually tossing the pen on his textbook.
"I'd rather study you instead."
Fiona shifts her gaze to me for a split second and the pink in her cheeks turns to a smoldering red.
She's used to Kelly making these types of comments, I'm sure but it's clear she's not used to him making them around me.
"Just... study," she mutters.
She swats Kelly on his shoulder.
As she leaves the kitchen, however, I notice an affectionate grin spreading across her lips.
Kelly sighs when she's out of earshot and shakes his head.
"I've got it bad, Finny boy."
I grunt enviously.
"I don't think you're alone in that."
He doesn't hear my response, though.
He's still in 'Fiona land.'
He glances around the kitchen with longing, as if every object in here holds a piece of her.
I've never seen Kelly this happy. Ever.
Then again, I've never seen him in love.
And as happy as I am for my best friend, I can't help but feel like the perpetual third wheel.
It's not that I'm jealous he's found someone.
I simply wish I had it too.
"I'm going to move in with her," he announces suddenly.
I glance up from my textbook and frown.
"Seriously?"
He nods and grins.
"I mean, she doesn't know it yet but I am."
"You've only been dating for a few months."
Kelly reaches for his pen again and shrugs.
"And?"
I chew on my bottom lip, glancing over his shoulder to make sure she's out of earshot.
"Don't you think it's a little...soon?"
My best friend winks.
"No better time than the present. Besides, the sooner I get her living with me, the sooner she'll realize I'm the man of her dreams and agree to marry me."
I scoff under my breath.
"You've asked her to marry you?"
He waves off my question.
"All the time. She thinks I'm kidding but I'm not. One of these days she'll say yes, though. And I'm telling you, Finn, moving in together is one step closer to getting me that beautiful, three-letter word. Y-E-S."
"I don't hear studying," Fiona's sing-song voice sweeps into the kitchen as she passes the doorway with the vacuum.
She doesn't stop to chat and Kelly smirks before tapping the page with the end of his pen.
"Alright," he says.
"Better listen to my lady before she kicks me out."
I nod and glance down at my notes.
The first part is well-written, a clear indication that I was paying attention in class.
As my eyes move down the page, however, the notes become sloppy and a few doodles sprout into the margins.
"So... what exactly was the lecture about today?" I ask.
Kelly frowns over his notes.
"The Secondaries."
The name sounds familiar.
I try to make out a few lines of my notes, recalling that our history discussion took a disruptive turn into an area where most professors choose not to discuss at all.
The Secondaries.
It's the term used to describe the population of half-bloods, the creation of a child born from a human and a vampire.
Hundreds of years ago, the vampire species mated with humans in an attempt to create a sub-specious that would forever be able to supply them with blood.
What they discovered instead, however, was that a Secondary's blood does nothing to quench an immortal's thirst.
It doesn't harm them as another vampire's would but it doesn't help them either.
When this realization spread throughout the vampire population, all the Secondaries were released from their clutches.
Vampires had no need for them, neither did the humans.
Reproducing between the two species came to an abrupt halt.
As for what happened with the Secondary species?
It's now just speculation.
Not quite vampire and not quite human, some say the Secondary species now lives in a remote part of the world, one that is shunned from all the rest.
Others say that the species has died off completely.
Then there are still a few others who believe the Secondaries live among us, being able to blend in with either species without notice.
"Professor Adams seemed to have quite an opinion about them," I mutter, thinking back to Leo's heated comments.
Kelly pops the cap off of his highlighter and squints at a line in his book.
"I guess. Doesn't matter, though. He wasted almost the entire class talking about them and it won't even be on the test."
I nod in agreement and prop my elbows onto the table.
"But if you had to take a guess, what do you think happened?"
One of Kelly's dark eyebrows arcs with confusion.
"With what?"
"The Secondaries."
He rolls his eyes and I can almost hear the thoughts in his head.
Studying isn't a task where either of us remains particularly focused.
Now that we're on a topic that's not even going to be on the test, our productivity level is quickly plummeting.
Kelly glances over his shoulder, making sure Fiona is out of ear shot before divulging in our non-studying topic.
"I think they're all still alive," he whispers.
"I mean, c'mon. They're half-vampire. Even if that doesn't make them fully immortal, they've still got to be tough as nails, right?"
I nod, urging him to continue.
"I don't think they could pass off as one of us if they were here," he murmurs thoughtfully.
"But I do think they're still around. Somewhere."
I mull over his words, debating whether or not his theory is plausible. It makes sense.
Besides, if the entire population was gone, there's no way our professors would have such an issue discussing them.
Kelly's right, they're still out there.
The only question is... where?
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hakuraikou · 1 year
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With December fast approaching and a new year is upon us, I'm trying to get stuff ready for a productive year. I decided to try this thing called "bullet journaling" or "Bujo" for short. There's so many different ways to do this, that I found the idea of starting one daunting, to say the least(ive been thinking aboit doing one for at least 2 years now). Since I'm trying other things, I figured I'd try this as well. Some people make theirs very artsy, while other make theirs very simple and minimalistic. I love and hate how much freedom there is to these. Anyone who knows me, knows it takes me forever to play persona or mass effect games because of the fear of making the wrong choice. There's so many different kinds of pages you can make from year/month/week at glance, habit tracker(water, periods, selfcare, drawing, etc), budget, doodle, songs, mood tracker, etc. As you can see there's alot you can choose from and make it your own. And nothing is set in stone. If I don't like a certain layout, I can change it on the next page. If there's a page that I hardly ever use, then the next month I don't have to add it. If I feel like the next page is gonna be a doodle page, I can do that. Just like my sketchbook, the laws and rules of my journal bend to me alone. But my goal with this is to form better habits as well as selfcare and that's not going to be the same for everyone. I think the next year is going to be pretty interesting. I had thought about waiting till January to start this...but instead of waiting why not just jump in feet first instead of procrastinating? (at Louisville, Kentucky) https://www.instagram.com/p/ClAOWuvNwW7/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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bugging-robot · 5 years
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Some HK doodles
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harfanfare · 3 years
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How to win a heart of Jamil Viper?
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1.   Don’t be a typical hero(ine).
Contrary to the popular romance trope, tripping over the air to land on a certain cool-looking boy, and dropping all carried things, wouldn’t make Jamil fall for you. Instead, just falling because of you and sharply crashing with a floor would make him rather cautious around you and keeping a distance whether he has anything in his hands.
Believe him or not, he doesn’t need another ditsy and erratic person around him—like a certain leader from a certain dorm, who happens to create a mess anytime, anywhere.
So, let someone else be the protagonist of the story.
In that situation, you may be a side character that gets its way through obstacles and classic borders of story scheme and is much more interesting than the main persona.
That’s how you get his attention.
‎‎‎‎‎‎‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎
2.   Be a help.
Oh, a person that would help him with his chores means to him much more than gold. Sometimes.
“Can I help you anyhow?” you asked when Jamil was going to the kitchen after a daily training with the rest of the dorm. He lifted his eyebrow, waiting for further explanation. “I mean with cleaning or something.”
Jamil glanced at you, not sure about your intentions.
Who would like to do something to help without having something in return? With only your will? No, it doesn’t work well in the same sentence.
But some help would be great. So, he just needs to keep sure that he won’t fall into any trap for letting you help, yes?
“Sure,” he said casually, not letting his face nor voice reveal any of his thoughts he run into. “[Name], right? Could you bring and clean the dishes from longue?”
And you helped. You really helped him a lot, staying over two hours till everything was shimmering with cleanliness and your abrupt desire to clean something and be more useful, burned out.
“Thank you for your help,” Jamil said, after correcting the last cushion in the Scarabia’s longue. You flashed him a smile. “But why, if I can ask, did you offer it in the first place?”
He got a quick response in form of a shrug.
“I... don’t really know,” you admitted, glancing at him. “...But you don’t complain, no?”
‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎
3.   Be his dish taster.
“The way to a one's heart is through his stomach.”
“Try it,” Jamil handed you a spoon filled with some kind of stew. You consentaneously your opened mouth and drank all content of the spoon. Your mouth filled with many flavours and you couldn’t be sure if you ever ate that good combination in your life. “How was that?”
“Excellent as always.”
You said it all sincerely and maybe would have asked for seconds, if not the fact that Jamil already turned his back to you and got back to pots. He took another spoon and tried the dish himself, clicked his tongue and added more salt.
Once again, he turned to you and handed you a spoon.
“And how was that now?”
“Excellent as always,” you chuckled as he frowned at you.
“Don’t you think that you should add more words to your dictionary? You say the same thing on every dish,” once he said that you finished drying the last plate and preparing silverware for today’s fiesta.
“Don’t you think that I won’t be able to eat anything at the party when I will eat enough of your cooking now to write a poem about each of your culinary masterpieces?” Jamil chuckled slightly at your words.
“So, you don’t want any more?” he teased, but inside he was really flushed. Praises or cajolery, it all makes his heart skip a beat.
Finally, there was someone who appreciated all work he’s done.
‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎
4.   Distract Kalim from him.
“You really shouldn’t go there,” you said, your voice as serious as you could keep it. “I mean, what if there is a monster who wants to kidnap you?”
Kalim cocked his head a little, considering your words. After a while, he nodded, fully convinced by your argument.
“You’re right,” he said. “I will warn others about this..!”
Kalim turned on his heel and spotted some people returning from morning classes. He ran to them, greeting them and walking with them as he tried to introduce the situation.
Still not believing Kalim fall for your words, you were standing alone in the centre of the corridor, a bit dumbstruck to discover the excuse Jamil came up with work.
“...Are you sure, you don’t want to tell him that some student’s from other dorm are here?” you asked as if saying to yourself your thoughts aloud.
But there was someone, someone who was hiding behind a big potted palm. He only gave you thumbs up as a preventative measure if there was still a chance that Kalim didn’t just dash through the halls to talk with some dorm students.
Jamil only looked at you and mouthed “No. Party. Today.” and quietly shifted to the corner, where the wall hid him and he could finally get up.
Mission accomplished.
‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎
5.   Get rid of bugs for him.
“[Name],” Jamil called out to you, bursting through the door to your room. He looked very pale and panic was staying still in his eyes. “Would you be so kind to... deal with an intruder?”
You frowned a little before biting back a sigh. At first, you were concerned. Even Kalim getting in a serious mess didn’t make him react that seriously. But then you remembered that there was one thing that could make Jamil call you out of nowhere, acting like in an emergency. Emergency only in eyes of few.
Bugs.
Jamil never admitted to you that he is scared of them, but every time you brought up the topis, he snapped his fingers at it, saying that insects just aren’t his favourite kind of animal.
“Hmm~ Maybe after I finish this chapter,” you said, conspicuously turning a page of the book you were reading and with all your will trying not to smile nor to look at the wincing expression Jamil was wearing.
“[Name],” he said, his voice shaking with anger or frustration. “Go there right now or I will make sure you won’t get today’s dinner.”
...No dinner?
“Yes, mum,” you said putting the textbook aside and getting up from the comfortable couch.
Of all people, Jamil is probably the only one—well, maybe also Trey—that could make those words sound dangerous. Like, no dinner made by the best chef in Scarabia? It would be pure agony.
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6.   Have competitions.
“Aren’t you a little too good in this game?” you asked, regretfully placing pieces of the game back to the initial places.
He gave you a smile that slowly turned into a smirk, as you groaned at the next round you have lost. You flopped on the big pillow, all your will to play destroyed, as you sank between really cosy material.
“I told you I won’t give you a head start,” Jamil said, his steady voice mixed with amusement. “You even told me that you don’t want me to go easy on you before the game started.”
“Too bad,” you clicked your tongue at his response. “I was sure that after watching you play with Kalim, I remembered your tactics.”
You’ve watched at least eight rounds of Jamil and Kalim playing this game, and when it was coming to end, you were almost sure you understood and remembered the technique he was using in certain situations.
But, to your disappointment, it looked like he – even without using any of his tricky cards in his sleeve – was a wolf in sheep’s clothing, because, after three moves, you knew that probably all three were wrong when the opponent was Jamil.
“You gained nothing by it. Of course, I lost to him or... there would be a trouble,” he exclaimed. “You are different.”
“Oh, thank you. I can lose but he can’t, huh?” you frowned at him as he almost choked on the surprise he felt by hearing your response.
“...Yeah, that’s it. Just it.”
‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎
7.   Have study sessions together.
“One class had a test before us,” you said scrolling through your class chat group. “They said that there wasn’t any question about these dates.”
Jamil scribbled down years of the most important magic wars, from time to time looking at you who were listing some test exercises and feeling somehow unmotivated to even properly open a history book.
Your notebook was lying in front of you, today’s lesson topic on the top of the page and many detailed doodles on its margin.
Once again... what was the unit you are having an exam about?
“It doesn’t mean, we won’t get a question about that,” Jamil tried to convince you, sliding textbook your way. “Now, read that aloud, while I prepare notes.”
You blinked twice as if woken up from daydreaming. Were you daydreaming?
“Are you sure..? I mean, all I will do is reading. Wouldn’t you rather want us to read it silently and then share our notes after this?”
“Don’t think about it much. I really like your voice,” he said it so thoughtlessly you weren’t sure if said it as an unarguable fact or just his smooth talker abilities were showing off, “and gave me your notes for the last exam so we’re even. And you won’t do any good notes when you’re sulking over this exam like that.”
‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎
8.   Remind him to take breaks.
“You won’t get out of here,” you exclaimed spreading your arms as shielding a door from him. “Not a chance.”
Jamil stood a feet next to you, grimace stretching on his lips as he knew what’s coming up.
“I have to go, [Name].”
He tried to get through you, lightly removing you of his way. He wasn’t a fan of using force on anyone, and he was a hater of using force on you.
Much more than a speakable argument, you were pushing each other closer or further from the door, having a staring contest and reciting all the things he had done in the past two days; except for his daily duties and with the upcoming birthday party of few students of Scarabia who happen to have a celebration in the same day, the number of tasks he was given was overwhelming.
“Stop it!” you protested, trying to push him back. “I am seriously worried about you! Please... take a break.”
Every time he was coming closer to the exit, you stepped back, blocking his way, bumping into him and having to try again.
“You know I have a lot of work to do,” he said, finally stepping back and giving you a break from trying to separate him from the door. “I can’t just give up all my duties, even if I would love a break.”
“I can do it for you,” you quickly offered. “But please, now, go to sleep and don’t you dare touch anything related to school or cleaning.”
...What a weird request.
When was the last time anyone told him to take a break?
He doesn’t remember.
But now, he can say it was recently, all thanks to you.
‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎
9.   Promise.
It was really hard for him once all his hard work to keep a high position within the dorm students suddenly dropped after his overblot accident.
“[Name]...”
However, the thing he regretted the most was hurting you. Taking the whole dorm under his unique magic spell, the hypnosis also affected you, making you another servant of his. Even you weren’t the one he ordered a lot, you felt betrayed that even the friendship you two developed didn’t stop him from overblotting.
And if he knew that you would avoid him like fire after the accident, he would probably hesitate a lot.
His throat tightened as he saw you one day in the corridor, looking somehow lonely and tired. He dashed to you, beseeching you to talk to him.
“Sorry for asking, but, Jamil, you don’t hate me, right?” you asked with a pain in your voice. You couldn’t even look at his face, feeling the incomprehensible weight in your gaze. “I mean... Do you only act in front of me friendly? ...Like... with Kalim..?”
“No, no, no,” he protested quickly, making it almost sound like a plea. He gently grabbed your hands, praying that you won’t harshly jerk them back because of him. “I don’t hate you. I really like you. I mean every word I said to you.”
The feeling of release struck you like thunder, you took a big breath, your eyes watering. You slowly reached for his touch, finally ending in a hug.
Jamil ran his fingers through your hair, smelling a familiar, reassuring scent of yours. After a while, he whispered a question.
“So... could you please not avoid me anymore? I know it will be hard to bring up the same relationship we had, but... could you give me a second chance?”
“Okay. But under one condition,” you said, slightly backing off from him. Before he could wonder about the term you would require from him, you finished your thought. “You must be honest with me. I... don’t know what will I do if it all turned to be a play...”
“I will,” he replied, putting his whole heart in these two words. “I will always be honest with you. And won’t ever use my unique magic on you.”
You looked up at him, a small smile starting to rise and heart-throbbing more wilder with his words. “Promise?”
“Promise.”
‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎
10.            Make him confess.
“What are you doing this weekend?”
Jamil appeared in front of you, almost like popping out of nowhere, as you were done with today’s lessons and slowly heading to your dorm. He caught up with you, changing his pace to match yours.
“I have no plans. I will be probably sleeping or something,” you answered honestly, shrugging and reminding yourself that you should finally hang out with some people from your class to make sure your social life isn’t all over dead.
You were walking in quietly before Jamil broke silence and spoke up again.
“Would you like to go somewhere?” he asked his voice only giving a hint of nervousness—it was nothing compared to the stress he felt inside. It was just a “yes or no” question, he knew that he will meet in future many amazing people like you and shouldn’t be stressed, but having someone so dear to him being asked for a meeting where he will try to finally out find his feeling... it is stressful.
“Hehe~ what, are you asking me on the date?” you teased, but much more than mocking, you were hoping for an answer. For the honest answer, he promised you.
“...And what if I am?” he asked, his voice a bit hushed, but steady.
You felt how heat was coming all the way up to your cheeks, although you tried your best not to let anything more, as if a blush wasn’t obvious enough, know how excited and spellbound you are.
“Then, your wish is my command.”
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tiger lilies, self destructing, and richard siken
pairing: peter maximoff/reader
summary: to peter maximoff, love is an anomaly that scares him more than anything else. however, you might be able to help him overcome his fear.
warnings: language! but that’s about it. kind of cheesy at some points but yknow what im not lactose intolerant
notes: this is the monsterous fic thats been kicking my ass this past week (6.2k words babey!!!) i was originally going to add ~~steamy~~ section to this one but i decided against it to make it readable for those who don’t wanna see that kind of stuff. if you want me to separately publish that then just lmk!!  (if any of yall wanna talk about richard siken to me then please do, his work is so good)
taglist: @stranger-names ,  @gooseyhouse , @parkersdarling​ 
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1. 
To Peter Maximoff, physical affection has always been a touchy subject-- no pun intended. His speed is a blessing, but also a bitter curse. He moves at the speed of sound, bouncing off the walls and tearing up the roads; he moves impossibly fast, and no one ever tries to catch up with him. People get tired of Peter rather quickly, not bothering to get attached to him when they know they can’t keep up. 
That’s why it’s so jarringly startling when you decide to stick around. When faced with the grand decision of throwing in the towel and leaving Peter behind or sticking around and trying your best, you chose the latter. It was surprising, to say the least. Peter waited patiently for the distance between the two of you to start growing; he waited for the void you once filled to open up again. However, the void never emptied, and the distance never grew. 
To anyone else, this would be a wonderful experience. Knowing that you wouldn’t be left behind or forgotten about would be comforting to anyone else in Peter’s position. However, this did the exact opposite for Peter. He wasn’t comforted or relaxed, on the contrary, he was always on edge. The future was cruel, and the mystery of it all felt like torture. 
To quote the great Richard Silken, “Someone has to leave first. This is a very old story. There is no other version of this story.” Peter lived and breathed by this ideology, that everyone he loves would have to leave eventually, whether it be by their own volition or not. It was obvious that you didn’t plan on abandoning ship anytime soon, so Peter decided he’d take matters into his own hands. If you weren’t going to be the first one to walk away, then he’d be the one to run away from you. He soon came to learn that loneliness was at its most bitter when you’ve come to taste the sweetness of love. 
Love was a strange, complicated beast that Peter Maximoff had never dealt with before. If he were to be completely honest, love scared him. It scared him more than dying scared him. To Peter, death was an escape. Death was the end of a tiring journey, it was safe and simple and easy. Love was the opposite, it was the mouth of a dragon and the edge of a blade. It was the beginning to something so fragile and powerful, something that could end in flames. 
Peter realized he loved you on a summer afternoon. The sun was shining and you were in the shade. He sat down next to you, and within minutes Kurt and Ororo appeared at your side. They seemed so put together, so sure and strong. Peter felt out of place-- he felt as if he were standing outside of a cabin looking in through the window at your wonderful friendships. He watched with his nose pressed against the glass as you walked across the room and opened the cabin door to let him in. 
Peter realized he was in love with you in the middle of the night. A thunderstorm raged outside the mansion walls and raindrops kept time as Peter walked down the hallway. You were sitting on the floor of the common room next to a dying fire, a book clenched tightly in your hands. For a moment, he just stood against a wall and watched you. As creepy as he felt, a part of him believed he’d ruin your night by making himself known. He was okay with being a fly on the wall if it meant he’d get to see you. Peter wondered if there was a world where he had the pleasure of knowing you, without you having the burden of knowing him. 
Still, you saw him. And you knew him. And you waved him over with a smile. He felt the urge to run, to leave you here alone with yourself, but he stayed put. Then, one step at a time, he moved forward. He got closer and closer before he found himself standing at your feet. 
“You’re welcome to stay,” you told him. He believed it. Peter sat down next to you, letting his shoulder brush against yours.
“What’re you reading?” He asked. Peter already knew what you were reading, he read the cover of the book the moment he sat down, but he still wanted to hear it from you.
“Crush by Richard Siken,”
“Oh. What’s it about?” Peter already knew what it was about. He’d read it at least fifty times.
“It’s kind of hard to explain. I’d much rather just read it to you and let you decide for yourself,” Peter’s stupid little heart lurched, and he almost cried at the thought. He held it together, though. 
“That would be nice,” He said softly. 
“Sorry about all the writing in the margins, I can’t help myself sometimes.” Peter scanned the sides of the pages, marveling at your notes. Some of them were reactions, littered with exclamation points and question marks and bold letters. Some of them were underlined phrases and little doodles-- most notably a little drawing of a chameleon on a tiger lily. He loved them.
“It’s okay. Literature is meant to be marked up-- what’s the point of reading if you don’t get to share the love?”
“That’s a good point,” You grinned. Then, the reading began, and you allowed Peter to rest his head on your shoulder as you read to him. Even though he’d heard the poems a billion times by now, they sounded brand new coming from you. He listened closely. You were arriving at his favorite part, “You are Jeff” section 24. 
“You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you...” You read on, not noticing the way Peter’s eyes had shifted from the book you were holding to your face. Peter’s mind wanders, and he curses himself for missing the lines you were reading “... You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and you’re trying not to tell him that you love him, and you’re trying to choke down the feeling, and you’re trembling, but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you’ve discovered something you didn’t even have a name for.” 
Peter felt like he was going to cry. You kept reading and he kept looking. It was getting late, and Peter was getting tired. Your voice had softened and slowed, and the fire that was burning in the fireplace had all but died. Peter was the one that fell asleep first, and you followed closely after. Both of you had lingering smiles on your faces. 
2. 
Intimacy is an odd thing, isn’t it? Thinking critically, intimacy is just vulnerability with more layers. It’s the closeness between people, it’s allowing yourself to connect with someone you care about. It’s stripping yourself down to muscle and bone and hoping the other person doesn’t let you bleed out. It’s a level of trust that is more than closing your eyes and falling backwards; it’s closing your eyes and letting them push you over the edge into the unknown, and trusting them enough to know you’ll be okay when you hit the ground.
It didn’t take long for Peter to realize that he had trouble with being intimate with other people. Too many times had trusted someone to push him over the edge, only to realize he’d be shattered when he hits the ground. After that, he decided intimacy was overrated. It’s not like anyone was going to have that kind of relationship with him, anyway. 
Of course, then you came along and uprooted his entire worldview, like you had with everything else. He found himself thinking about you at every waking moment, which inevitably led to him… thinking about you at every waking moment, if you catch my drift. Sure, intimacy involves more than just physical intimacy, but Peter knows he can’t ignore the feeling that rises in his stomach whenever he’s around you. For the first year or so of your relationship, Peter became very familiar with the feeling of an ice-cold shower. 
What Peter didn’t take into consideration was you. For some reason, Peter struggled to understand the fact that you were just as attracted to him as he was attracted to you. It was no secret that Peter was insecure, but he never really realized how much his insecurity affected his relationships. If he couldn’t love himself, how could anyone else? Peter is the only one who gets to see his persona in its truest form, and every time he has to avert his eyes. It’s safe to say his physical appearance has been the cause of very many painful-- and occasionally tear-filled-- sleepless nights. 
He told you this. He told you everything. He told you about Erik, he told you about his childhood, he told you about everything he loved and hated and feared and yearned for. That ordeal alone was scary enough, knowing that at any moment you could decide you didn’t want to deal with him anymore, but as always, you stuck around. You told him everything. You told him about your family and your struggles. You told him about everything you loved and hated and feared and yearned for, and not once did Peter even think that he wanted to walk away. This is the kind of intimacy that, over the years, Peter had struggled with less and less.
Still, it was the sexual aspect of intimacy that freaked him out. It was a beast he’d never dealt with, a feat he’d never faced. That being said, as every day went by Peter became more and more… frustrated. He didn’t know how to approach the subject, so he'd just let the subject approach him and wing it. 
And as he sat on his bed watching as you twirled around to Tears for Fears “Everybody Wants To Rule The World”, Peter realized he didn’t have much to worry about. 
“Dance with me, dollface,” you laughed, reaching out for him. You looked like someone straight out of a movie, the lim blue light coming from Peter’s arcade machines illuminating a halo above your head. You put Molly Ringwald and Emilio Estevez to shame. Peter took your hand, grinning like an idiot as you twirled him around. 
There he was, dancing in his mother’s basement with his favorite person in the entire world. He wasn’t a great dancer, and neither were you, but that didn’t matter. Peter was dreading this visit-- he hated the idea of being back in the basement that made him feel like a failure. But you assured him that you’d be there with him, and that getting to see his family would make it all worth it. His family isn’t what made it worth it, though. 
“Brain Damage” by Pink Floyd came next, slower and a bit more somber, but still danceable. Your arms shifted to around his neck, pulling him closer than he already was. Somehow, you ended up with your back against the wall as the song came to a close. He kissed your forehead, then your cheek, then your lips.
“I love you,” Peter spoke softly. This was a small victory-- he’d been so scared of the mere idea of loving someone. You were the only one who got to hear his love confessions. They were for you, and for you only.
“I love you too,” Peter would never, ever get tired of hearing that. Knowing that you love him is enough to keep him going for a hundred years. And he knows the odds, he knows that love is rocky and painful as much as it is beautiful. He knows that love can feel sweet in the beginning and go sour overtime. He knows that first, second, third relationships don’t always work out. But he thinks this is going to work out. And Peter doesn’t think this will ever go sour. Maybe that’s his blissful ignorance talking, maybe he’s jinxing it, but at this moment, he doesn’t care. Right now he is at his happiest, at his most content. 
“You wanna watch a movie?” You asked softly, pecking Peter on the cheek. He could feel the warmth radiating off of you, and Peter grinned. In an instant the tv across the room began playing the opening credits to the first movie that popped into his head. 
“The Breakfast Club?” You questioned. Peter shrugged.
“What can I say, I’m a sucker for a good coming-of-age kind of movie,”
You sat against the headboard of Peter’s bed, allowing Peter to settle beside you. Your head rested on his shoulder, and he was quick to grab your hand. Peter loved the closeness. Over the past year, he’d come to realize he was a very affectionate person. Previously, Peter hadn’t known soft, physical love; the only time anyone would ever touch him would be as punishment or defense, not love. Love. Peter had gotten more comfortable with the idea of love, because when he thinks of love he thinks of you.
3. 
Every good story has a villain. A villain that you love to hate, or hate to love. A villain you can sympathize with, a villain you can’t excuse, a villain that the mere mention of makes you sick to your stomach. An unexpected villain. An obvious villain. A villain that’s just trying his goddamn best. Sometimes the villain is defeated, sometimes the villain changes their evil ways. Sometimes the villain dies and the crowd cheers. 
Peter Maximoff never thought he’d be the villain of his own story. He tried his hardest to be a good person, but there was always that side of him that made him afraid. He was like an explosive; whenever someone got too close, he’d detonate and destroy everything around him. It was a self-defense tactic, albeit counterproductive. 
It killed you to see him that way. He told you about the relationships he’d lost to himself. He told you about the abandonment and the loneliness. It broke your heart. He tried to distract himself, drowning himself in work so he’d never have the opportunity to ruin what he had with you. Peter Maximoff was a walnut tree; every time he planted his roots and began to grow, he’d kill anything that grew too close. However, the constant working started to wear Peter down.
It started with the late nights. He’d collapse next to you at four AM, knocking out the minute his head hit the pillow. Still, he’d be awake before you were, already scrambling around trying to complete various tasks. He was like a machine that was running from it’s problems. The late nights turned to all-nighters, and the few hours Peter managed to salvage set aside for sleep had shrunk to a few minutes at a time. He didn’t eat anything with even a hint of nutritional value. At this rate, he was going to work himself to death. 
The worst part? Peter knew what he was doing. He wasn’t stupid. He just needed to shut up the little voice in his head that urged him to act out. The entirety of his childhood, Peter destroyed what he created. The need to be isolated, the feeling that he deserves to be alone spread throughout his body like a cancer. He locked himself away in the basement, trying desperately to stay out of everyone’s way so they wouldn’t shut him out. People tried to coerce him out of his cave, to pull him out of the bottomless pit he threw himself into. Peter saw them as the sirens trying to lure him into the ocean of loneliness, and he wasn’t going to fall for it. In his eyes, anyone who tried to help him were the villains of his amazing, heroic tale. Fortunately for him, one by one, they started to give up on helping him. They thought he was a lost cause; a fucking loser who was destined to wallow in his own self-pity until he died. At first, this was a triumph. He defeated them, he outwitted the sphinx and slayed the dragon. But a part of him hated himself for becoming the worst-case scenario that every parent feared their child would grow up to be. 
He pulled himself out of his pit and back onto his feet, all by himself. It was hell on Earth, but he did it. That cancerous feeling of uselessness retracted back into itself, now residing in the place next to Peter’s heart. However, that horrifying fear of becoming a burden began to grow again, this time when Peter was in his mid-20s. He began to overcompensate, and that led him to where he was; always on the brink of collapse, running on nothing but coffee and twenty minutes of sleep. In return, Peter got to have friends. In his mind, that was fair. In your mind? Not even close.
You managed to catch him in his bedroom as he was in the midst of simultaneously scribbling in a notebook and reading an open novel. Peter Maximoff would always be the most beautiful person in the world in your eyes, but at that moment, he looked like hell. Your plan seemed foolproof, but then again, you weren’t sure what you were walking into. Lately, Peter didn’t seem like himself. Probably because of the lack of sleep. 
“Peter?” He looked up at you, eyes half-lidded. “I got you something.”
“You did?” A sleepy smile was all he could muster, but that was google enough for you.  
“I did. It’s to mark exactly three years since I first met you,” you sat down on his bed, placing the small wrapped book right next to you. Peter glanced at the calendar on the wall-- oh god, you were right. It’s been three years to the day and he forgot. He deserves the title of “World’s Worst Boyfriend”. Scott will probably be upset that he’s losing his title.
 “What’re you up to?”
“Finishing up some old work I’ve been putting off,” he punctuated his sentence with a yawn. “Some of my old work and some of Hank’s, too.” “Why are you doing Hank’s work?”
“He seemed stressed about something, thought I might help clear his head,” The sentiment is sweet, you’ll give him that.
“Alright, well, can we talk for a minute?” Alarm bells went off in Peter’s brain. There has never, in the history of the universe, been a good conversation that started with ‘can we talk for a minute?’ or any of it’s cruel variants. 
“Actually, I’m kind of busy right now, can this wait?” It was obvious that the answer to that was no, but still, he felt the need to ask. 
“Not really, no. It’s important.” Peter saw the next few seconds playing out in his head. The inevitable had come to fruition; you realized that you could do better, and now you were cutting him loose. He couldn’t blame you, not really, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t going to rip him to shreds. He realized that whatever you brought for him was most likely a parting gift. How sweet.
“Oh. Alright.” 
“Well, I’m going to give it to you straight,” you sighed. “I’m worried about you, Peter.”
Oh. He’s heard this speech before, he knows the spiel. He can vaguely recall a guidance counselor telling him the exact same thing before Peter decided to call him a slew of expletives. The tar pit in his chest began to grow.
“I’m fine.” This was a lie. The first lie in a long chain of lies that Peter was about to tell to you, his favorite person in the world. He loved you, but in that moment his vision clouded over. You weren’t the person he loved and cherished anymore, no, you were just another faceless blur that provided a temporary escape. 
“Really? I feel like you’re pushing everyone away, you’re pushing me away.” Peter was becoming more and more irritated by the second.
“I told you, I’m fine. I’m not pushing you away. 
“Don’t lie to me,” your voice is firm and unwavering. “You don’t sleep, you almost never eat-- I don’t think I’ve seen you stand still for more than three minutes once in the past month--”
“That’s just how I am,” Peter huffs. He wanted this conversation to be over. “That’s not your problem.”
“Your wellbeing is my problem, Peter, that’s the whole point of being friends with someone. Even more so now, because you’re my partner and I care about you--” 
“Then stop,” Peter rolled his eyes. He's more irritable than normal-- most likely because he hasn’t slept in days. He could almost feel the venomous arms of isolation creeping around him. It’s a sick pattern, he knows; every time someone gets close to him, he feels the need to self-destruct before they lose interest. Even now, even after all this time, Peter’s still powerless against the poison in his veins. 
“What?” You’re losing your reserve and your stature. He can tell. You’re slouching and picking at the cuticles on your thumb. It’s almost as if he’s been shoved into the back seat, and is now being forced to watch as a stranger takes the wheel and crashes the car. So much frustration, so much hurt, and it’s all coming out right now, onto you. Peter already regrets this entire interaction, but still, he manages to spit acid. 
“Stop caring. Just leave, I know you want to. I know every night, you lie awake and think about all the different ways you can leave me in the dust. Not that it would matter to me.” This is another lie. Your eyes flash with hurt, but you stay put. You know he’s just being an asshole because he’s exhausted and too stubborn to admit that you’re right. He’s egging you on intentionally, trying to get you to snap and walk away. 
 “Peter, god, I love you but sometimes you can be so...”
“So what? C’mon, be honest with me,” He huffed. 
“Frustrating,” You surrendered. The poise you once held was gone. “I know it isn’t your fault-- I know you’ve trusted so many people so deeply and been betrayed or sold out and I know you’ve loved so many times and been thrown to the curb without a second thought. But I don’t know what I can do to convince you that I’m here for you, and that I love you. I’ve tried everything, and it feels like I’m talking to a brick wall. I want to make this work, but I need you to work with me.” It’s evident in your voice that you’re desperate. You’re just hoping you’ll get through to him, somehow. “I need you to want it as bad as I do-- hell, I need you to want it at all.” Here it comes--
“You ever think, maybe, I just don’t want you to be that person for me? I’ve spent my life being independent, my entire existence so far has been built around the fact that I’m going to end up alone. People come and people go-- people like you and Charles-- and they tell me they care. They tell me that they love me and that they're here for me. And then they get tired of me and they leave. I wish that you would just leave me the fuck alone and let me live in solitude,” There it was. The lie to end all lies. The words tasted awful coming out of his mouth, and the whole ordeal left his mouth tasting very… sour. Peter had to look away, he couldn’t look at the expression on your face.
“Fine. If that’s what you want.” Your eyes never met his, but you paused before you exited the room. “I know you’re probably just… I don’t know, going through something, but you’re being an asshole. Don’t talk to me until you’ve sorted your shit out. Enjoy your solitude.” You left the room impossibly fast, your fists clenched so tightly Peter feared that your nails would break the skin on your palms. He struggled to keep it together-- why the fuck did he do that? 
Peter collapsed onto his bed, and it’s only then that he realized you left behind the gift you got him. A part of him thought he should return it to you, but the other part of him urged for it to be opened. He tore the wrapping paper off before he realized what he was doing. The hardcover book the wrapping paper concealed was handbound, the cover littered with your beautifully familiar handwriting. In big, bold letters The Best of Poetry in the Humble Opinion of Y/n L/n was scrawled at the top. 
Peter vividly remembers a late night you spent talking to him. You told him about your favorite poems, outlining each and every little detail you loved about them. Some of them he’d read already, some of them he hadn’t, but all of them sounded like artwork coming from you. He opened the front cover, and you’d written something else on the inside. 
“In the words of the wonderful Peter Maximoff, ‘What’s the point of reading if you don’t get to share the love?’. This is me, sharing the love.” 
Carefully, Peter opened to a random page in the book. He saw the notes in the margins and the doodles and the exclamation points and before he knew it Peter was on the verge of tears. He was barely containing himself, and then he read a specific annotation you made. 
He had opened to the first page of “The Worm King’s Lullaby”, one of your all-time favorites. A specific line was underlined, one that Peter was all too familiar with: “Someone has to leave first. This is a very old story. There is no other version of this story.” Beside it, you wrote:
“As much of a genius Mr. Siken is, I have to disagree with this. If you love someone enough, you’ll never leave them and they’ll never leave you. Even if they die, even if things don’t work out, you’ll always have a little part of them to carry with you. Carry this part of me with you, Peter. Not that I plan on leaving anytime soon.” 
That was it. The floodgates broke. Everything that Peter had held back came pouring out-- the past 10 minutes finally caught up with him, and they hit him like a bus. He sat in the corner of his bedroom, his knees pulled up to his chest so tightly he thought his legs would snap. Peter wanted to rip all his hair out or punch a hole in the wall or hold his head underwater until he was nothing but an obituary and a headstone. His chest burned and the pit of despair inside his chest had overtaken his system, and he hated himself with a burning passion. Why did he do that? Why did he do that? Why the fuck did he do that?
Peter Maximoff had his breakdown in solitude, revealing in the fact that he was, undeniably, the villain of his own life.
4.
As it turns out, ‘getting his shit together’ is much harder than Peter originally anticipated. He's trying, he really is, but it's hard. Especially without you there. Peter knows that he fucked up, and he knows that he needs to work for your forgiveness. And don’t worry, he’s going to work for it. 
It had only been a week, but the entire mansion could tell that something was off. Life just wasn’t the same without the randomized gusts of wind that would knock people off their feet; no one had been seriously injured or had something stolen from them. The whirlwind that was mansion life, while still chaotic, lost it’s fun. 
Charles tried to keep things running smoothly, but he was an old man and didn’t exactly understand you and Peter. People would knock on your door every now and then, but you didn’t answer. You were much too busy analyzing exactly how much of a bitch you were being-- realistically, the answer is 0%, but you didn’t see it that way. No, from your perspective, you saw Peter having a mental breakdown and you ditched him. Pretty shitty move.
What you didn’t realize was that Peter was doing the exact same thing, however, the blame falls mostly on his shoulders, and boy does he know it. He’s been scripting his grand apology, trying desperately to find the right words to express exactly how sorry he is. Peter was never very good with words-- it’s always too hard to know if you’re going to say the wrong thing and mess everything up. Although, it’s hard to see how the scenario could get any worse.
He made the executive decision to start with “I’m sorry”-- a solid start to any apology. Sure, he could stop there, but Peter realized that he’d probably need more to win back his partner. So, he managed to scribble down a few more lines on a tiny notecard he was supposed to use for studying. Oh, what a wondrous redemption arc this would be; Peter gets into a fight with his wonderful partner and ruins their relationship and then struggles to come up with a coherent apology. 
“I’m sorry about what I said, that was shitty. I shouldn’t have said that.” Peter’s eyebrows furrowed in frustration. God, he was going to die alone, wasn’t he? Maybe this is the cruel punishment the world is dealing to him, the universe is deciding that Peter’s redemption arc would be better if it, well, didn’t exist. Even so, he isn’t planning on giving up or giving in just yet. 
He scrapped what he had so far and started at the beginning once again. His 9th grade english teacher would tell him to write about what he knows, and though he doesn’t know much, he’s an expert when it comes to himself. Peter knows how he feels about you, he knows how sorry he is, and he knows that he really, really, really wants you to know that he didn’t mean a word he said about not wanting you. Peter knows about love, at least a little bit, and he realizes he’ll need more than just words.  
His mind drifts to that night, years ago, in front of the fireplace. He vividly remembers a tiger lily and a chameleon scribbled in the margins of your book. Realistically, Peter couldn’t get his hands on a chameleon, but a tiger lily was a different story. In high school, Peter took a botany course because he thought it’d be easy. It wasn’t, it was boring as all hell, but it seems like his slacking paid off. He knew tiger lilies were indigenous to Asia, but they’d become quite common along New England-area roadways. 
Peter grabbed his jacket and took off, tearing through the roads like his life depended on it. In less than 10 minutes, Peter found himself in the middle of New Hampshire drenched in rain. In hindsight, he probably should’ve checked the weather before leaving. Nevertheless, he takes off into the small wooded area that laid passed the road’s end. Dozens of mushrooms dotted the muddy ground and mossy rocks clouded his peripheral vision. The rain begins to lighten as he spots a bright orange tiger lily peeking through the remains of a tree stump. He sprints over to it.
The tiger lily is bloomed and beautiful and Peter can’t tear his eyes away from the wide array of speckles and splotches and color. It’s pristine, but some of the petals are torn or wilting. The roots stretch into the stump below it, and Peter leans closer. The stump is old and worn, fungi and bugs eat away at the base next to a large hole where a family of worms reside. The stump is ugly, sure, but it’s useful. It helps keep the bugs fed and keeps the worms warm. There’s a metaphor here somewhere, but Peter is too distracted to find it. 
He gently picks the flower and spins on his heel, taking off once again. The rain makes it harder to run, but it’ll take a lot more than water to stop Peter. By the time Peter gets back to Xavier’s the flower is a little crushed, but it’s still somewhat pristine. 
He has the flower, he has the apology, and now all he needs is courage. Thankfully, that courage comes quickly as he instinctively knocks on your bedroom door. He probably should’ve stopped to collect himself, but he was riding a wave of adrenaline that wouldn’t come back. 
“Go away, Jean,” You called from inside. You sounded tired, and it made Peter sad. 
“It’s-- uh-- it’s not Jean,” Peter can hear your hesitant footsteps approaching the door, and suddenly the courage he managed to build up drained. His hands are shaking by the time you open the door. You look up at him, and Peter looks back at you, and suddenly everything is much harder to do. He looks down at his feet. 
“Hi.” Your voice is hoarse, but clear. 
“Hi.” Peter’s voice is uneven and quiet. You stand there in silence for a minute before Peter pipes up again.
“So, uh, you’re probably still mad at me and I get that, but I just want you to hear me out. I-If that’s okay,” You nod slowly, and Peter takes a deep breath. He thinks about the written apology that sat in his coat pocket, and he makes the last-minute decision to forget about it. He’ll speak from the heart, or, whatever people in rom-coms do. 
“I’m sorry. It was really shitty of me to get angry at you because you were worried about me-- although, I guess shitty is an understatement. Everything that I said about, yknow, not wanting you or Charles or anyone else around anymore wasn’t true. I need you guys, and I love you guys and it was unfair of me to push you away. Solitude really sucks. I guess I’m just not very good at navigating relationships,” He exhales, and his chest shudders. “I understand if you don’t want to be with me anymore, I just thought I should make it clear how I feel.” It’s only then that he remembers about the tiger lily in his hand. “Oh, and this is for you.”
“A tiger lily?” you smiled softly. “These are my favorite-- how did you know?”
“I’m just observant, I guess. You usually draw them when you’re bored, I figured you’d like to see one in person,” You gently took the tiger lily in your hand. The silence that hung in the air was deafening, and Peter realized that was probably a bad sign. His chest drops just a bit, and he takes a small step backwards.
“I guess I should probably leave you alone--” Peter can’t get very far, because you immediately jump forward and wrap your arms around him. Eyes wide and heart pounding, you can feel Peter’s arms lock around your waist. 
“Thank you,” You whispered. “Please don’t go.” Peter was smiling so hard his cheeks ached, and a horrible weight had been lifted off his shoulders. The close-contact was refreshing; he didn’t realize how much he missed it until that moment. He was pretty sure he would never, ever let you go. Not again.
5.
To Peter Maximoff, physical affection has always been a touchy subject-- that is, until you came along. You proved to him that he deserved physical affection, that his mutation and his personality and weirdo quirks didn’t make him lesser or unlovable. Peter Maximoff deserved love, and you were the one who never failed to love him. 
You sat on a wooden chair in front of the fireplace, reading to the group of children sitting at your feet. The emotional lines of “Snow and Dirty Rain” fell from your lips, and with every turning syllable the small group would listen just a little bit closer. Peter did, too, desperately trying to hear every single word you said. Class was almost over, and once the students were dismissed you’d probably stop reading.
“I made this place for you. A place for you to love me. If this isn't a kingdom then I don't know what is,” Your eyes tore away from the page to look at the kids at your feet. They fell upon Peter, and a smile erupted on your face. 
Peter vaguely recalls the twisted idea of love that he held as a teenager. He thought love was a dragon to be defeated, a battle that could be won or lost. It’s clear now that love is the opposite-- it isn’t a fight or a battle or a thing to be conquered. It’s more like a flower; it needs to be cherished and cared for in order to grow. Sometimes the flower wilts and dies, and that’s natural, but sometimes the flower lasts for a lifetime. 
Love wasn’t a dragon or a knight, it didn’t have a hero or a villain; it was much more like a tiger lily and a tree stump.
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5uptic · 3 years
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crewfu: fanfic spotlight!
We work together by Anonymous (5up & DK, unrated, gen | 248 words)
Summary: One likes plants and baking, the other loves to create and design video games. They stay up and create monstrosities together, it's their fun, it's their favourite game. Aka a 5up and Dk roommate au!
No matter how life tangles, I’m still here with you. by hungryandsleepy (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 279 words)
Summary: 5up has been working so hard on his new map, and of course, he needs someone to give him a motivation to go to sleep.
objectively pretty by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 462 words)
Summary: steve is drunk. he's pretty sure 5up is too. that doesn't mean being called pretty is any less momentuous.
you plus me by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 489 words)
Summary: 5up and Steve meet.
he said to me by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 656 words)
Summary: 5up and Steve share a moment.
by the snowmen by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 670 words)
Summary: Steve has a moment when it's all over.
today you got to know me (a little bit too slowly) by runninohhoney (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 675 words)
Summary: Steve lights up a cigarette. 5up doesn't smoke.
what would it take by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 787 words)
Summary: It's Steve's first mission. He hecks up. Or does he?
sorta cute by floweruru (5up/Steve, unrated, m/m | 822 words)
Summary: ‘I wouldn’t do that,’ he said. ‘That’s just disrespectful,’ he said. Yet there was 5up, crushed like a can in Steve’s embrace, feebly kicking at nothing as his feet leave the pavement.
i was gonna kill u, but ur kinda cute?? by Cthulhuer (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1k words)
Summary: Steve is a mess and 5up is worse.
I hear a Symphony by AwkwardAce (5up/Fundy, unrated, m/m | 1.1k words)
Summary: He exhaled until his lungs ached for air, fingers twitching as he opted to remove the sleek white gloves he wore in a feeble effort to soothe himself. It didn’t work. He wrung his trembling hands together as his eyes raked down the worn leather case taking in the doodles- some etched some drawn- across the faded surface. He snapped the buckles open and his breath hitched, catching in his already tight throat. For a moment the world span, his head throbbed and he wanted nothing more than to run and hide. 5up breathed out slowly, shakily.
staring by lytriis (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.1k words)
Summary: steve asks 5up out. 5up doesn’t know how to respond.
and it's four am, and yet, you're here by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1.2k words)
Summary: in which steve shows up at 5up's house, in the middle of the night, completely spontaneously
more than this by mangoedges (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.2k words)
Summary: Steve catches 5up venting.
3:15 by vesque (5up/Steve, general rating, m/m | 1.2k words)
Summary: Steve tries to guess Five's name. It's much more difficult than he anticipated.
things were different by fourpebbles (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.5k words)
Summary: His eyes circled around to his friends, Kimi and Janet engaging in pleasant comversation, sleepy and becoming increasingly more sober. He looked, finally, across him, and caught Dumbdog staring at him. What now bro, what did this guy want. small talk, turns into not small talk, then there's no talk
Once Upon A Dream by SmearedWords (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.5k words)
Summary: 5up looks ethereal, while Steve is struggling to breathe. "You're not real either." Or: Steve has a crush and a nightmare in three parts, 5up is tired, the crew life is hard and Polus sucks.
the ones you love will call you back by homeward_bound (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 1.8k words)
Summary: stevesuptic: dude, is it weird that i miss vegas   DumbDog: No? I do too.   stevesuptic: okay [steve misses vegas and apollo. they talk about it]
cough it out by cj__writes (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2k words)
Summary: Apollo thinks that Steve must be well and truly gone, at this point, because he giggles, like Apollo’s just told a particularly funny joke. He looks Apollo right in the eye and asks, “Do you trust me?” “Absolutely not.”
ivy by Secular_Czar (5up/Steve, teen rating, gen | 2.1k words)
Summary: It might be a sad day, in general, but Steve isn't about to let it get to him. His friends won't ever let him wallow either.
The Colosseum by WhenTheFogClears (general rating, gen | 2.1k words)
Summary: Five squinted, looking at the colosseum intensely. He thinks Apollo was latched onto the sphinx’s shoulder, fur matted with blood. Janet was slumped against a column, probably out, with Kimi whose bow was snapped in two, her leg twisted at an odd angle. DK was in the corner trying to cast various supporting hexes and charms with a broken arm, whilst Hafu was dragging a heavily bandaged Steve away. or 5up slaughters a cat
Oneshots :) by woofles1990 (5up/Fundy, 5up/Steve, teen rating, multi | 2.5k words, oneshot collection)
Summary: Just a bunch of MCYT/Among Us oneshots, mainly featuring 5up's crew because yes :)
the adventures of 5up and steve staying up late because they're under 30 by 5280ft (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.5k words)
Summary: “The night is young!” Steve yells at the ceiling, throwing his hands up in the air. “Take advantage of it! Commit crimes! Fuck hoes!” Five catches his hands in the air and laughs. “You wish you had hoes.”
unreasonably in love by cj__writes (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 2.6k words, chaptered WIP)
Summary: "It was like pieces of a puzzle, everything coming together. And now, here they are, standing in their apartment, which looks more like a hollow shell than a home, filled solely with scattered boxes and the minuscule amount of furniture that they brought with them to Vegas." Or: what happens after Apollo and Steve move in together.
cant be love by fourpebbles (Apollo/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 3.5 words, chaptered WIP)
Summary: He had chuckled to himself, he felt so stupid. Who in their fucking minds names a playlist 'sugr?', he thought, internally cringing. A story where a Steve meets an Apollo, and some things happen.
Somewhere in the darkness, us together for a while by tumtummeke (Apollo & Kimi & Steve, teen rating, gen | 3.6k words)
Summary: Apollo worries about Steve. Steve breaks his vape pen. Kimi plays power washer. Self-indulgent angst, with a generous helping of friendship and cuddles.
odyssey by 5280ft (5up/Steve, teen rating, m/m | 23k words, chaptered WIP)
Summary: "First you will come to the Sirens who enchant all who come near them. If any one unwarily draws in too close and hears the singing of the Sirens...they warble him to death with the sweetness of their song. Therefore pass these Sirens by and stop your men's ears with wax that none of them may hear." -Homer, The Odyssey
Also: SilverSprinklez10‘s yupwaves collection.
Summary: This is a Harry Potter AU based on the characters/personas of the youtubers/streamers.
FAQ:
Wait what is this: pretty straight to the point! i’ll regularly share crewfu-related fanfictions to this blog :)
How regularly is “regularly”?: great question! LOL. it depends on the flow of fanfics that get uploaded, which i do not have any control over, but i’m looking forward to do this twice a month. after all, it’s only me doing this and i often run on a tight schedule.
What’s the format like?:
[title of fic with link] by [author of the fic with link] ([main pairing(s), if there is one/multiple], [fic rating: eg, general rating], [relationship: eg, m/m] | [word count in k] ([added prompt to specify if it’s complete or not)])
Summary: [summary provided by the author. if it doesn’t have a summary, a “No summary” prompt will be put instead]
(What does WIP mean again?): Work In Progress :)
Why are you doing this?: from the beginning, my blog has hosted conversations about RPF (real people fiction) and crewfu pairings. this has evolved into people sending me updates about certain fics in the crewfu tags every now and then, but i wanna take the next step and just do these things myself. after all, i’m already lurking in the tags often to see the fics that get posted. as someone who is both a writer and a reader, i wanna appreciate fanfic writers and help out other people that want to read fanfic and consume more fandom content!
Will it be AO3 only?: well, ao3 has a very helpful tag system that makes finding fics incredibly easy, as well as allowing people with no accounts to like and comment on fics, so that’s the site i will personally look in for fanworks. but if there are any fics you’ve written or liked in any other platforms, such as wattpad, you can always contact me through my inbox (send an ask or a dm!), and i’ll make sure to include for the next fanfic spotlight :)
Does it mean you won’t reply to fic asks anymore?: yeah, i guess. since i’ll be doing the searching myself it seems counterproductive. but if i ever skip a fic or again, it’s in another platform, or you’ve posted/read the fic a while ago and you want to get more traction on it, hit me up and i’ll take it into consideration!
Will you read every single one of the fics on your list?: oh no. again, i run on a tight schedule, and also i have my own taste when it comes to fics. i won’t be reviewing fics or any of the sort, and my intention extends to simply sharing these fics to this page so people will have easier access to them :) that’s where ao3 tagging becomes SUPER useful!!!
So what’s the criteria for the way you’ll sort out the fics in your list?: word count, going from lowest to highest. in case of fics in other platforms, i guess i’ll put them at the top of the list. i’ll also be looking for fairly recent fics, so let me know if you want any old-ish fic to be included.
I see you talking mostly about 5up/Steve and Steve/Apollo. Can I still send/see other crewfu fics?: why yes absolutely! my goal is to push every fic which heavily features regular crewfu characters - 5uptic and supdog just happen to be very popular pairings. so, to give you a list: core 4 (5up, hafu, dk, steve), apollo, aipha, annie, janet, kimi, ellum, koji... you know the drill. it doesn’t have to be centered on a relationship, or about 5up in specific, etc. my only requirement is that any of the previously mentioned members are a central part of the fic or are HEAVILY featured in it (sorry, minecraft fics with 50+ tags who only mention 5up as an afterthought won’t make the cut :/).
Isn’t shipping Bad™?: well, it’s a little more nuanced than that. i will go out of my way to discourage and shame people who often violate CCs’ boundaries by acting like so and so has a crush on this person, or that this and that are Actually Into Each Other or secretly dating. any sort of tinhat bullshit is a big nono (think larries). but i run on the assumption that people who write rpf understand that what they’re doing is simply write a completely fictional story using real life personalities, and understand the boundaries necessary to do it - aka they’re not tinhats, they understand they can’t assume everything about CCs’ thoughts and personalities, they understand that what they’re writing is strictly fiction, they keep these works only in fandom circles, etc. (but again, it’s only one me doing this, so please be kind if i don’t happen to know that this person is Actually a tinhat or whatever).
show fic: NO. (seriously. i don’t feel comfortable putting my ao3 account out there. please respect my privacy on these trying times <3)
I REALLY don’t care about your rpf/fic talk: fair! i’ll be tagging every single one of these posts as “fanfic spotlight”, so just mute the tag using tumblr settings so you’ll never have to look at these! likewise, you can follow the tag if you want to keep up with it, or search it on my blog to look at the other entries you might have missed (but this is the first one! lol).
Hey, my fic is here and I don’t feel comfortable with it being shared over here: no problem! let me know as soon as you can and i’ll take it down <3
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taro-im · 3 years
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Hello! Thank you for hosting this 111 follower event. I'd like to participate, if that's okay? I hope you don't mind me doing this anon,, Anyway, my favorite characters are tanaka and akaashi (very contrasting i know lol) and I'm a masc nonbinary, my hobbies are figure skating, drawing, and playing the piano. I do decently in school, I'm in the photography club, I have a cat named mickey, and I've been described as a very blunt person? I'm not afraid to say what's on my mind once I've formed an opinion. I try my best to include everyone (be it like, servers, or group projects, etc.) Since I used to be the weird, quiet, anime art kid people used to pick on. But like ever since senior year started, I've become more popular?? Its just mostly freshmen though (who somehow found my tiktok like what the hell)
Ahhh I’m so sorry for the late reply!!! Anyways ofc!!!!
I match you with:
Akaashi Keiji
your trope is:
School Rivals
ahhh I belive the both of you would make a great match, his cool introvert personality mixed with your outgoing and forward personality!!!! 🥺
How the two of you met:
the two of you met by you being Bokuto’s childhood bestfriend in elementary and middle school, you moved and came to a Highschool called Fukorodani for your last year in highschool seeing your best bud Bokuto and he introduced you to Akaashi, the two are like polar opposites and Akaashi looked so chill, you noticed you had tons of classes with him but he seemed like he didn’t care you were in them, which made you think he hates you so you “hate” him too, the math exam test scores were up and you were excited to see you were in first place only to see Akaashi ranked 1- and that’s how the rivalry beginned, it was always him and you that had the most tension in class he didn’t know why he wanted to beat you but something about being against you made classes a little exciting and his heart throb from seeing you… while on your end you were focused on your after school club and studying really hard just so you could beat him once… till one day you saw him studying at the library casually doing his Ap Lang work “Hey that’s where I always sit” you said pissed off he could look so calm doing today’s frustrating homework “huh? This is the school library l/n, I don’t know what your talking about, I didn’t know this was your seat sorry” he said stretching his arms getting out of the seat “nevermind also… um how do you do that prompt?” Forgetting that you forgot to finish that one question, he laughed at your sudden question, you just asked him if he could get off a seat and now your asking him for help? He asked you to pass your notebook to him and he could see detailed doodles on little corners of the page “they draw so cute” he thought to himself while helping you with your work, it was like fate was on his side, once he saw your tiktok on his fyp with you doing your little hobbies he followed you and you were shocked he found it because almost no one from school knew your tiktok account… by now you “rivals” have been more close and the more he’s with you the more he knows every little detail/thing you do and even Bokuto secretly ships it, one day you lost your precious cat Mickey…. You were devastated looking through sidewalks and streets to find your cat, your cat Mickey was your best friend when you were alone and whenever you came home in the past your cat always comforted you and now your cat is gone… when you came to school the next day Akaashi noticed your outgoing and bright persona was changed you looked so sad and he asked if you were okay… you told him everything and he just reassured and told you he was going to help you find Mickey “Akaashi… you don’t have to” “no problem y/n I don’t like seeing you sad” he said face flustered, after school he searched the neighborhood with you and surprisingly the both of you found your missing cat in a little bush “thank you Akaashi!” You said jumping into a hug only for him to be more flustered and slightly push you back “y/n I really like you” “I really like you too!” You said with a smile on your face heart beating out of your chest
what a relationship with him would be like:
Akaashi and your relationship would be so adorable- okay he loves when you take photos of him with your little camera he brought for you, he loves it when you big spoon him and he loves that your really honest about things that make you uncomfortable and things that make you comfortable, when it’s winter he would take you skating just to see you skate, the both of you got another cat, he loves leaving sticky notes full of sappy romance manga lines that were used for him to work on, so expect those, since being in a relationship with you he feels more confident on speaking his mind and whenever he sees you he just can’t stop smiling no matter how many months or years you’ve been dating
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captainjanegay · 3 years
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Where I’m Meant to Be | Stucky | Meet-Cute, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Kid Fic, No powers AU | Chapter 1 | 4.6k words | Ao3
Summary:
Bucky is a single dad coming back from a work trip with a very bored, very whiney 7-year-old girl. A mysterious stranger with a kind heart and a notebook full of doodles comes to the rescue.
A/N: This fic was supposed to be just a short one-shot for the Stucky Bingo but somehow, it's at 11k at this point and it's nowhere near done. I have two more chapters all done and ready and a vague outline for the rest of the story. It's my first time posting a fic chapter by chapter so it's both exciting and kinda scary. I hope you'll like the story enough to stick with me for a while. 
My sixth fill for the @stuckybingo2020​ ♥
.
At some point in his life Bucky didn't mind spending hours at airports and he found traveling ��even work-related —quite enjoyable. But that was when he was young, stupid and alone. Now he's older, just as stupid and has a wonderful girl in his life. 
The girl in question is now standing next to him, little arms crossed and a sullen expression on her face. She's repeatedly kicking at the leg of the chair he's sitting on. There's no real force to it —she's only 7 after all —and she's not doing it to do any real damage to anyone or anything. It's just little taps, really and she's doing it out of boredom. But dear lord, Bucky's about to explode.
"Alex, sweetheart," Bucky says, slowly breathing out through his nose. "Could you please stop with that kicking? It's a bit annoying."
"But papa," she whines, drawling out the word. "I'm bored!"
"I know, love and I'm really sorry but papa’s gotta do something important for work," he sighs, trying to run a hand through her hair. She ducks and flops onto the chair next to him, an angry little pout on her face. "I have to finish it before we go on the plane. I'll do it as quickly as possible and then I'll be all yours, ok?"
It's not really surprising when he doesn't get an answer. With another sigh, he leans to the side and presses a kiss to the top of his daughter's head and then turns back to his laptop. 
From the very moment she woke up today, Bucky knew it's gonna be a long day. She was cranky and teary all morning, not wanting to say goodbye to Natasha and it took a good hour to calm her down. Then Bucky had to basically beg her to eat something before they left for the airport. It wasn't a great day. And Bucky knew she didn't do it just to make him miserable, she was just as frustrated and tired as he was. On top of that, he has to edit and upload a report from the conference and the airport Wi-Fi is so bad Bucky is close to tears himself.
The work would probably take less time if he wasn't getting distracted every minute or so and glancing to the side, making sure that Alex is fine. Or relatively fine, the bad mood excluded. At the moment she is slouching on the plastic chair, still pouting. Felicia—a pink stuffed Triceratops —is placed on her lap so at least Alex has something to occupy her for a moment.
Bucky tries his best to get through the documents quickly but he doesn't want to miss any errors either. He gets lost in the work for the entirety of about five minutes when he hears something truly surprising.
Alex laughs. It’s so unexpected after what seems like hours of complaining, crying and whining that Bucky’s head snaps up from his laptop and he looks at his daughter.
She is still sitting by his side, Felicia pressed closely to her chest and there is a smile on her face. It’s definitely not aimed at Bucky, though. So Bucky follows her line of sight and… oh.
It’s not like he didn’t notice the guy sitting across from them before. Because he did. It would be rather impossible not to notice this guy. He is tall and well-built and could look intimidating if it wasn’t for his bright blue eyes or tousled golden hair or the gentle smile or the fact that he’s wearing the softest beige sweater Bucky has ever seen. He is both ridiculously handsome and cute at the same time. So of course, Bucky noticed him before. But now he tries to figure out what about him made Alex laugh. It doesn’t take long, because the man is holding up his notebook, showing the page to Alex.
On the page are three little, cartoon-like doodles. The first one at the top looks unmistakably like Alex—her brows are furrowed, arms crossed and a little storm cloud is hovering above her. Underneath there’s his daughter again but this time she’s laughing, her eyes only small slits and a little sun peeks from behind the cloud. The last drawing, just next to the smiling Alex, is of Bucky. His head is partly hidden behind a laptop screen and there’s a look of utter concentration on his face. Above his cartoon persona floats a swarm of little gears, question marks and lightbulbs. Bucky snorts. It’s probably quite accurate.
Noticing that Bucky is staring at the drawing, the stranger startles and his cheeks turn red.
“I’m not some creep, I promise!” he starts explaining himself, before Bucky even opens his mouth. “I just—she seemed so upset and I’ve heard you said you have something important to do so I just wanted—Man, it’s weird, isn’t it? I’m sorry I promise I just wanted to help, not bug your kid without permission.”
“It’s not—,” Bucky starts, slightly taken aback. “It’s very sweet of you, actually. Thank you. Really, that’s just—I don’t mind. And Alex here seems to enjoy your drawings.” Bucky smiles down at his daughter and then at the stranger. His smile falters a bit and he sighs. “I’d really love to chat some more but I really need to get this shit done and the airport Wi-Fi is truly horrible.”
“Oh! Bad word!” Alex gasps, covering Bucky’s mouth with her little hand. “You said a bad word! No sweets for you!”
The stranger laughs at that and Bucky probably shouldn’t be as charmed as he feels right now. He just kisses Alex's hand and leans away from it.
“OK, sweetheart. Promise not to eat any when we get home,” he says solemnly. “But papa really needs to work a little longer, OK? Ten more minutes, I promise. Try not to bother the nice man too much until then, yeah?”
She lets a long-suffering sigh but she agrees.
“I’m Steve, by the way,” the man says, smiling at Bucky. 
Before he gets the chance to answer, Alex chimes in, “I’m Alexandra. And papa’s name is James but only mama and people at work call him that. Everyone calls him Bucky.”
The man — Steve — lets out a small laugh. “It’s nice to meet you both. Alexandra, do you want me to draw you something specific, while we let your papa work?”
“Oh, can you draw Felicia? She’s a...,” Alex furrows her brows in concentration, “tri-ce-ra-tops! That’s a dinosaur!” 
Steve leans forward from his chair and smiles at her. “She’s so cool! But weren’t dinosaurs kinda dangerous?”
“Some of them, yeah. They ate other dinosaurs. But the ones like Felicia only ate plants, so she’s cool.”
Steve lets out an attentive hum but something in his expression tells Bucky that it’s not new information for him and he’s just indulging Alex and letting her share what she knows. It makes Bucky feel a wave of sympathy towards this Steve guy.
Soon enough, a new page of Steve’s notebook gets covered with doodles of various dinosaurs, based on Alex’s jurassic knowledge—it’s a bit flawed, but Bucky is proud of her nonetheless.
It takes Bucky a few moments to stop sending glances towards the two. It’s partly because Steve—no matter how sweet he seems to be—is still a stranger. Steve might be bigger than him, but Bucky would end him if he tried to do anything to his little girl. But there are no red lights when it comes to Steve—and Bucky always prided himself on his ability to read people.
The other thing making it hard to go back to work is the fact that the scene he’s looking at is quite an adorable one. Both Alex and Steve are sitting at the edges of their seats, leaning over the passage between the two rows of chairs and their eyes are fixed on the notebook propped on Steve’s knee. They’re chatting, exchanging random facts about dinosaurs but since their knowledge is limited, they switch to talking about modern animals soon enough. Steve listens intently to whatever Alex has to say without patronising her. And sadly, Bucky has met a fair share of adults for whom it was impossible to take Alex seriously just because she was a kid. It calms Bucky enough to actually focus on his work for a little longer.
Some peace of mind does wonders for his concentration and the ten minutes he promised Alex are actually enough for him to finish editing the reports. The WiFi is still a bitch, though. However, after staring at the loading circle for what feels like an eternity, he is able to send the documents. With a triumphant little cheer, he turns off the laptop and slides it back into his bag.
Steve looks up at him and smiles. Alex completely ignores him, though, still too focused on whatever Steve was drawing. Bucky feels a bit betrayed. When she looks up, she glances at Steve first, probably to ask why the drawing has stopped and turns to Bucky when she notices Steve looking his way.
“Oh, you’ve finished the work, daddy?” she asks and when he nods, she smiles and reaches to wrap her arms around his neck. “It took you some time. But I’m proud of you.”
Bucky laughs at that, shaking his head slightly, “Thank you, sunshine. I see you were having fun with Steve while I was busy?”
“Yeah! Steve drawings are so pretty! He drew you riding a dinosaur!” Alex giggles, pointing at one of the little drawings.
Raising his brows, Bucky sends Steve a questioning look but the other man just shrugs and rubs at his neck. “It was her idea,” he says with a sheepish smile.
The doodle Alex is pointing at is indeed of him sitting on a dinosaur's back. It’s the one with the long, giraffe-like neck, Brachiosaurus if he remembers correctly. The cartoon Bucky’s arms are wrapped around the base of the reptile’s neck, his hair fluttering behind him and his mouth is open in either a big smile or a scream, he’s not sure. Either way, it’s a very cute drawing.
“Well,” Bucky says. “I’m not a fan of horses but I’d totally ride a dinosaur if I had a chance. Shouldn’t he have a saddle, though?”
It’s not even that funny but Steve still laughs and Bucky smiles at that. His daughter is less impressed or at least tries to appear so. She rolls her eyes but there’s a grin on her face.
“You’re so silly, daddy. They didn’t have saddles back then! And besides you’d need a very, very big one for a dinosaur!”
Bucky hums in agreement and looks up at the departure display. Noticing that their flight’s gate is open, he nudges Alex lightly.
“We gotta go, sweetheart,” he says. She perks up a bit but then glances at Steve with a small pout. “Sadly, we have to say goodbye to Steve. On the bright side, we’re gonna be home soon, yeah?”
Alex nods and slides off her chair. Steve looks up at the display and straightens up.
“Oh, my flight’s boarding, too. But you know what?” Steve asks and then rips the page with all the dinosaur doodles and holds it out to Alex. “You should keep this, if you want.”
Hearing this, Alex’s whole face lights up and she takes the drawings with gentle hands, as if afraid to mess it up. “Thank you, Steve! Those are so cool I’m gonna keep them forever!”
“I’m glad to hear that,” Steve smiles. He looks up at Bucky. “It was nice to meet you, guys.”
“Likewise. Thank you again for the help. It was very nice of you,” Bucky says sincerely.
“It was my pleasure. My knowledge about dinosaurs is so much better now,” Steve’s smile grows even bigger and Bucky chuckles.
Bucky leans to help Alex put on her little backpack, since she refuses to put down the drawing and then reaches for his bag. He rests his hand on his daughter’s back and turns to Steve one last time. He’s still sitting at the edge of his seat and is watching them. A smile is still plastered to his face and at this point Bucky is sure that it’s his default setting.
“Bye, Steve. Have a safe flight,” Bucky says.
“Bye, Steve. Thank you for the dinosaurs,” Alex adds, making Steve laugh.
“You are very welcome, Alexandra,” he says. “Have a nice day, guys.”
Bucky gently steers Alex towards their gate. Before they disappear behind the corner, he turns away to look at Steve one more time. The man is already looking back and he waves at them when he notices Bucky staring. Alex waves back enthusiastically and Bucky just ducks his head, feeling flustered all of sudden. He used to be more collected around nice, attractive people. And Steve definitely qualifies as both.
***
Some time later they finally make it to the plane. Alex flops down onto the middle seat and eventually — after a long discussion and promises that he won’t ruin it — she lets Bucky put the drawings she got from Steve into the folder he keeps his documents in. When the treasure is safely put away Bucky straightens to put his bag in the overhead compartment.
“Oh,” he hears a voice behind his back and a low chuckle quickly follows. “Fancy bumping into you here.”
Bucky looks over his shoulder and the surprise makes him try to close the compartment while his other hand is still holding the bag. He yelps in pain, making Alex look up.
“Steve!” she says with a smile, completely ignoring her father’s distress.
“Hello again, Alexandra,” Steve shoots her a quick smile and looks at Bucky, concerned. “You’re OK? I didn’t want to spook you.”
Man, he really got bad at keeping his cool around attractive people. Feeling a blush creep up his neck, Bucky nods. “No, no, you didn’t. I’m just a clutz, this happens a lot, ignore me.”
Steve raises an eyebrow at him but he doesn’t say anything more. For a moment they just stand in the narrow aisle, looking at each other. Finally, Bucky’s ability to think kicks back in and he moves to the side.
“Sorry, you probably want to get through to your seat.”
“Actually,” Steve says and glances down at the boarding pass in his hand. After checking it, he points to the seat by the window, on Alex’s other side. “That one’s mine.”
“Oh,” Bucky looks at the seat and then at Steve. His cheeks still feel warm for some reason but he hopes he's not blushing too visibly. "That's great. I'm just gonna—"
Bucky shifts to the other side and takes a step back, making room for Steve.
"You're flying with us back home?" Alex asks with a hopeful glint in her eyes. "Will you draw something more for me?"
"Alex, come on. Don't abuse Steve niceness like that," Bucky scolds her gently but before he can even finish the sentence, Steve starts shaking his head.
"It's fine, don't worry about it. I often doodle when I get bored anyway so I'd be honoured to draw for you again, Alexandra," Steve grins at her.
She actually lets out a little happy squeal when she hears that and Bucky's heart skips a beat. He's absolutely charmed by the way Steve treats his daughter. He really seems like entertaining some random little girl is the best thing he could be doing and while Bucky - absolutely objectively - thinks that Alex is the most wonderful little girl in the world, it still seems unusual. And he positively melts every time that Steve uses her full name, just because that was the way she introduced herself the first time. Most adults Bucky knows don't do that with other adults, not to mention kids. And Steve is just so… kind and genuine, it takes Bucky off guard but it's a really nice surprise.
"Ok, fine," Bucky says with a smile. "You have no idea what you've brought on yourself. Is it possible to strain your hand from drawing too much? The flight's almost two hours, right?"
"Does your dad always complain this much?" Steve asks Alex and she giggles in response. He sends Bucky a glance over her head and he has a smirk on his face. Ignoring Bucky again, he says to Alex, "Hey, have you ever watched Sesame Street? There was this one grouchy green guy."
Bucky just sends him his most unimpressed look. Steve doesn't seem affected. Alex is delighted. And in truth, Bucky has to bite the inside of his cheek to contain a smile.
It turns out that on top of being nice and lovely, Steve is also a little shit, because he draws a Bucky-version of Oscar the Grouch - with a grumpy expression and wild hair, sitting in a garbage can. It's actually amazing. Bucky doesn't say that out loud, but he snorts when he sees it, so that might betray him a little.
This time — prompted by the mention of Sesame Street — the conversation resolves mostly around animated movies. To Bucky’s surprise, it turns out that Steve is a huge Disney fan. He doesn’t even try to hide it. Not to brag but Bucky knows his way around animated movies — partly because he has a 7-year-old daughter and partly because who doesn’t like animated movies? But compared to Steve and Alex? He knows nothing. They use names he doesn’t even recognise - who or what even is Flit? Judging by Steve’s drawing it’s some kind of a bird, apparently. When Bucky can’t remember — he knows it, of course, it just slipped his mind — the name of the redheaded princess from Brave, he is given the most disdainful look he’s ever seen. Both by his daughter and by Steve. Bucky still tries to participate in the conversation, at least for as much as they let him. He never expected his own daughter to team up with some stranger against him. It hurts.
The pain is all forgotten when Steve and Alex start quietly singing Under the Sea from The Little Mermaid together. Bucky can’t help a laugh that bubbles from his chest at the sight. How is Steve even real, Bucky has no idea. He is over six feet of muscle, his bicep is bigger than Alex's head and he could probably bench press Bucky and here he is, sitting next to Bucky’s little girl, drawing a picture of Megara, because she’s his favourite Disney princess and singing a song from The Little Mermaid.
This guy can’t be real.
About half an hour into the flight it turns out that Bucky was wrong — Alex does leave Steve alone but it’s only because the tiredness catches up to her and she falls asleep. And she’s sleeping with her head resting on Steve’s arm. It’s a really nice arm, Bucky has to admit, a nap on such an arm would be good and comfortable even for him, probably. But that doesn’t change the fact that he feels left out.
“Sorry,” Bucky says quietly. “You probably want your arm back, I can just—”
He offers to move Alex’s sleeping body but Steve just shrugs with his free arm, careful not to jostle the girl.
“Don't want to wake her and I really don't mind," Steve says, smiling at Bucky.
"You sure?" Bucky asks and after getting a nod in confirmation, he chuckles and shakes his head. “I keep trying to figure out where the catch is but I’ve got nothing. You’re just naturally this kind, aren’t you?”
Steve barks out a laugh and then slaps his hand over his mouth to quiet the noise. He looks down to make sure he didn’t wake Alex.
“Oh there’s plenty wrong with me,” Steve says with a chuckle. “For one I’m usually really awkward around kids. Alexandra’s such a great girl, though. But I do like to help and try to be nice whenever I can.”
Bucky narrows his eyes at Steve. “You think you’d side-track me by complimenting my daughter? You’re totally right, but that doesn’t mean I’m not curious.”
With an exaggerated eye roll, Steve makes the ‘bring it’ gesture and grins. “Come on. Hit me with your best guesses.”
“OK. OK, fine,” Bucky says and shifts in his seat so he can look at Steve more directly. Crossing his arms, he asks, “Do I have a limited number of guesses?”
“It’s not that long of a flight,” Steve shrugs with one shoulder, grin still in place.
In a theatrically thoughtful gesture Bucky strokes his chin gauging Steve with his eyes.
“You… secretly work as a hitman” Bucky says slowly, “or like, an underwear model. Which is not a bad thing to do.”
A blush creeps up Steve’s cheeks as he laughs again. “Those are… pretty far off. Why those two?”
“Well, you’re built appropriately for both from what I can see,” Bucky explains, enjoying the way Steve cheeks go darker. Maybe he’s not so helpless at talking to attractive people as he thought. It feels a whole lot like flirting.
That terrifies him for a moment. He didn't do flirting in what feels like ages. He doesn't have time for this. Should he even do this? He has a daughter, he shouldn’t just—
Bucky takes a deep breath and smacks himself mentally across the head. He’s not doing anything bad. He’s just talking and having fun with an attractive stranger. Maybe even flirting a bit. And that’s OK, this is allowed, he doesn’t have to go anywhere else with that. It’s not like he’s ever going to see the guy again, anyway. Natasha would punch him for denying himself that. So he will make sure not to mention it the next time they talk.
“Well…,” Steve rubs the back of his neck. “I am not. Hitman or— I’m neither of those. I’m actually an illustrator. Mostly freelance stuff. I paint sometimes, too. But that’s mostly for fun.”
“OK, fine. Somehow I can believe that. You seem like an artsy type,” Bucky agrees.
“No hitman vibes anymore?”
“Who says a hitman can’t enjoy painting in his free time?”
Steve laughs, throwing his head back. Somehow he manages to keep the left side of his body completely still, mindful of Alex sleeping on him.
“I don’t know if there’s a point in trying to convince you, but I’m really not.”
“Sure. Probably what a hitman would say,” Bucky waves a hand at him but smiles. “That’s cool though. Being able to get paid for doing what you love.”
“It is. Sometimes you get frustrated enough to hate it but it’s still pretty cool,” Steve agrees. “You don’t like your job?”
Bucky scrunches his nose, making a non-committal sound as he tries to find the best way to explain. “It’s not that I don’t like it. It’s fun. Interesting, exciting, sometimes frustrating as hell, too. And the responsibility can be incredibly stressful. It’s just…  I never took time to think about what I really like doing in life. And since the job was good enough, I just stuck with it.”
Steve hums, nodding along to Bucky's words. "It's never too late to figure it out, you know?" he says. "I mean, I don't wanna impose and tell you how to live your life or anything. I'd never. I just— I think it's an important thing to know."
"You might be right," Bucky agrees. He glances down at Alex. "I don't think it's a good time for me to experiment, you know? Besides — if there's one thing I know for sure that I like it's having this little rascal around."
The smile on Steve's face turns soft. But only for a moment, before it turns back into that smirk he had earlier. "Any guesses left? About my dark side?"
"A few," Bucky grins. 
It's a bit of a lie because he really struggles to see Steve as anything but perfect but he can try. It's just a game they're playing to kill time after all.
"You are that kind of guy who can eat garbage food and not move a finger and still look like you've just walked straight out of a gym. I hate those people. It's so unfair."
"Are all of your guesses based on how I look? I kind of see a pattern here so far."
Bucky opens his mouth to protest but there's something in the way Steve looks at him, with a raised eyebrow and one corner of his mouth quirked up that makes him close his mouth without a word. He might be blushing. Maybe he's being too forward. It's probably not appropriate to talk about a stranger's body this much.
Before he gets the chance to apologize, Steve answers, "And you're wrong, again. I like working out. Takes my mind off things, helps me clear my head when I need that. Besides I used to be small and sickly my whole childhood. Couldn't even play with other kids for too long without getting an asthma attack. So I'm kinda compensating for that," he jokes.
"Really?"
"Yeah. All pointy elbows and bony knees."
"Huh," Bucky says. "Bet you looked way cuter than me when I had my bowl cut. We all had our dark moments."
Steve laughs again and Bucky really enjoys the sound of that. He really enjoys Steve's company in general, which is weird considering they've just met. It usually takes him much more time to get comfortable around people. Maybe it's the fact that they'll go their separate ways as soon as the plane lands makes it all easier.
"I'm kinda disappointed, you know?" Steve starts after a moment. "I thought you'd guess at least once. Or at least would be more creative with those."
"Who says I'm done? It was all on purpose, I was just assessing, gathering intel. I'm a scientist, I don't know if I've mentioned that before," Bucky points a finger at Steve. "You've got to be methodical about stuff."
Raising his hands in surrender, Steve tries to keep a straight face. He fails miserably.
"I wanted to say that you secretly hate dogs or cats but that would be just too harsh," Bucky says. "I don't think you're a monster."
"I love dogs," Steve confirms. "Always wanted to get one but my flat's too small and I doubt that'd be good for a dog. I don't have anything against cats but I feel like they don't… like me that much."
Bucky chuckles. "I feel like there's a story there."
"Just— My friend Sam has a cat and she absolutely hates me. I can't leave my phone on the table cause she pushes it off, but she doesn't touch Sam's. Every time I'm there she follows me around and hisses at me for no reason. She peed in my shoe more than once," Steve says and tries to look hurt when Bucky starts laughing. "It's not funny! I haven't done anything to deserve this. I tried to bribe her with food, I tried to pet her but I only got scratched for my efforts. And she doesn't do that with anyone but me."
"So that's your dark secret? That your nemesis is a cat?" Bucky asks with a grin.
"It's… definitely true."
“Can’t say I’ve seen that one coming,” Bucky laughs.
Steve shrugs with one arm. “I’m full of surprises.”
Clearly, Bucky thinks, shaking his head at the other man.
.
Title: Wrap me up (in your love) Creator(s): niallhoranbitches Card number: 065 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27745402/chapters/67911988 Square filled: B2 - Airport Rating: Teen and Up Archive warnings: None Major tags: Meet-Cute, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Kid Fic, No powers AU Summary: Bucky is a single dad coming back from a work trip with a very bored, very whiney 7-year-old girl. A mysterious stranger with a kind heart and a notebook full of doodles comes to the rescue. Word count: 4591 
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iconsumeheadcanons · 4 years
Text
persona characters autism headcanons!
hi im autistic and i started my day with sun so now im !!!!!!!!! some of these headcanons are from elsewhere on tumbr, but i dont know where :(((  so i am hoping someone out there knows that n that everybody knows that i love them <3
(also go check out mollypaup and i think hypeswap if you havent already! they post some good stuff autism+adhd hc too!!! i think.. oh! and thieves-in-the-palace!!!)
P5
Joker
there was some artwork from someone on tublr..where they pointed out that he doesnt really talk outside the metaverse so--hes hyperverbal as joker and just near nonverbal as akiren
he stims ALL THE TIME. that phone thing, the pencil thing, the little tappy tap of his foot, pulling at his bangs when hes embarrassed/smug. someone get him a fidget spinner. he’ll prob learn to do tricks with it
he probably sucks at focusing in class, like i know its just the game design but hes always surprised out of his daily “star out the window at the nearby office building” when his teachers ask him questions
mona mentions when the pt is at Wilton for the first time (after they run into shido) that joker eats like shit, and that could have multiple causes at the start of the story of course, but when i first played i thought that joker was a picky eater and that the variety (and amount of food) at the buffet would be an Ordeal...
tho mona makes that comment bc joker looked pale after having a little ptsd moment from shidos voice, but i didnt know that the first time i played
maybe when joker makes a face at ryuji putting so much ginger in his gyudon? joker probably does not like pickled ginger lol
his favortive foods are all spicy, which is why the curry he makes for his friends is always ‘overly spicy’, and why kasumi makes him a curry bento and joker kept going “...?” .... “....?!”
overly reflective glasses have been a great plus for him bc now he never has to make real eye contact every again!
mona Soft. play with Ann hair. maybe Braid. nice
puns (Gorou the Goroumet)
he has so many options to be straight up rude sometimes in game. he probably no clue on his own, which is why he defaults to Not Talking. people probably mention his constant scary face, which is just him being nonexpressive, squinting at all the fucking bright lights, and Tired
executive function who? we do everything last minute folks
high pain tolerance, which is why he was the kid that was always climbing trees in elementary school to get basketballs unstuck from the branches
his sixth sense lets him see treasure and possible places to climb/crawl bc 1. Shiny? Steal it. Steal it Now. and 2. Could i fit in that? Time to Find Out
probalby a bit of a klepto too oops. he’ll return it tho!! but he has to do it dramatically or he’ll die
cant sit properly to save his life
smells and touch are Great, they can keep him grounded when his brain goes off to police or dead rivals or guilt or
if a friend hung out with him and gave him total reigns of the agenda, he would choose to nap on the floor while his friend does something off to the side quietly
hyperfocuses on handy tasks (i.e. lockpicks, coffee brewing, cleaning, his part time jobs) and some things like movies and books. everything else is a tossup
his (normal) navigation app is his most used app bc he still doesnt know where hes going, even though he only goes to the same few places in the city
hates being sweaty, literally cannot stand it. probably double exhausted during the summer
but Needs Compression so hes often Struggling
Futaba
paraphrase from p5d “i have no motor skills so i cant play rhythm games :(” need i say more? (i will regardless)
echolalia all the time, from anime, memes, the PT
those headphones she wears all the time? noise cancelling ear protectors babey
only talks about her interests, “normal” talking is Not Easy, but she is still communicative w others despite her worries. shes not “hard to understand” at all but she feels the anxiety nonetheless
only talks informally, cannot talk ‘politely’ with out imitating someone around her
shes had meltdowns and anxiety attacks in game :( i relate so hard
Technology. thats it
def had an egypt phase that pops up every few months. probably came from yu-gi-oh
has Immune to Bright Lights buff.  joker is very jealous
“Time to make like a tree and leave!” and 30 other iterations
video game metaphors are the only ones that makes sense to her
probably relates hard to robot characters in anime for their general androgyny and confusion about human emotions and connections
probably gets told that shes “too smart to be on the spectrum” by teachers >:( she fails their classes on purpose
wakaba’s autistic too that just how it is
the Connection that she establishes with Joker is so Warm. my life goals include adopting an older brother like futaba has lsdkfjslkfj
also eater of 5 foods only, i mean, she brings cup ramen to the beach. i just really admire her...
hides in small spaces for comfort
doesnt she have like uhhhhh hyperthymesia or something like that?
Yusuke
art
his entire social link is learning how humans work, which i relate
talks seriously all the time
“sarcasm? who is that? are you saying I was sarcastic?...how?”
cant remember to take care of his body, and madarame did not help with that either
lot of uncomfortable staring, hes overdoing the eye contact thingy
infodumps all the time, doesnt know hes doing it
needs a lot of support even if he doesnt think he deserves it. no one ever complains about helping him out tho
visual stims my friends
he didnt know that you could look up pictures on the internet but he does know you can stream live videos of waterfalls and fluffy animales!!
I am certainly in the mood
for something salty today.
he and joker are scared of math. numbers do not interact
Yusuke, futaba, and akiren are a trio and i know this bc their first day of non-thievery interacts is Akiren clearing Futabas room w/o permission, futaba hyperfocusing on destroying medjed, and yusuke rearranging futabas figurines so they are more visually appealing
morgana is a support friend for all of them bc igor knows they need it
P4
Souji/Yu
yes, he mostly wears gray semi formal clothes bc parents tell him to, no, he will not changes this
Schedule or Death
“sorry, could you repeat that?” “huh? oh yeah, i was saying that--” “yeah that’d be cool.”
cats, fishing, he just likes to be quiet. you can literally spend a day at the beach just to think if you want, and that is what yu want
has a lot of scripts for things (of which he shares with nanako!) but if he runs out he just stops talking..
inaba is a godsend bc its so fucking quiet and warm
he Yearns to hold his friends hands, but he shies away from a lot of touch (excepting yosuke, teddie, and nanako)
Cooking and Cleaning makes the world better. he and joker vibe together with this
unlike akiren, he strong arms any executive dysfunction into Be Productive or Else. his punishment is feeling the pure anxiety of having to make up for ‘lost time’. (another symptom of his workaholic parents)
writes everything down, notes are very neat, has pages dedicated for bad doodles when hes not feeling his usual Super Classroom Focus
Cannot handle secondhand embarrassment (most often caused by yosuke) and will quietly slip away to random cats or origami folding
hungry, crunch crunch folks. probably needs chewelry bc he used to chew on his shirt collars when he was younger.
cleans up after everyone in the food court, constantly worries about them accidently hurting themselves. likely spends half of group conversations watching peoples hands
he canonically eats expired food, nanako plz help your brother
really clumsy, but people only notice after they decide that he is a cool person
video games are too chaotic for him
exhausted every night from the pure amount of masking he does, if a friend spends the night (or is like yosuke) they will know his more comfortable weirdo self (tho everyone knows hes a weirdo eventually)
hyperempathetic, sometimes just understands animals and children better than peeople his age or older
Yukiko
her jokes
she and souji get in ‘trouble’ together, she and joker commit crimes together
she and chie have to coordinate outfits, its important
actually understands metaphors, but does not understand people
like me, had no clue that creepy kid was flirting with her
she is very angry when she has meltdowns that might involve slamming doors and shouting. her parents call these ‘tantrums’ and ‘unfitting for a polite daughter’ but really thats because her meltdowns tend to be caused by arguments w her family after a long day of school and TV world traipsing
the metronome meme, except hers goes between Loudest Person in the Room to Quietest Pin Drop in the Planet. she is completely unaware of this
her atmosphere brightens when chie appears. that is not only the lesbian energy within her, but also because chie is like her Favorite Person
Cannot wear Pants. No (tho she wants to try it! but she puts them on and her soul instantly squashes)
happy flappy lesbian! watch out!
Naoto
the pouty face. all the time lskdfjlasdkf
hes really snappy sometimes and i love that for him. he and akechi should fight just to see what would happen (please read Bang Bang Shoot Shoot on AO3)
“do not touch me or my hat, thank you”
no one has ever seen him shutdown and no one ever will (except for his grandpa)(and kanji)(and rise)
probably likes certain food textures and will stand for nothing less, probably feels embarrassed about his preferences with friends
constantly jumps between ‘everybody hates me so i should act like them so they dont hate me’ to ‘i refuse to be anything but very comfortable as myself, and i dont care that im making you upset sir’
he and souji are the king and queen of subtle stims, but for unhappy reasons :(
does not make jokes. cannot joke around. understand? yes, do? no.
loose clothes are the only good clothes, but all tags and obtrusive seams will be obliterated by kanji tatsumi
not very empathetic so he probably comes off as an asshole to strangers (like when he throws away his classmates confession letters without reading them) but he tries so hard to sound comforting when his buds are struggling.
his understanding of others emotions/reactions come from his learning as a detective, which seems cold+clinical to others, especially compared to souji, whos completely unexpressive but very introverted people person
P3
Hamuko/Minako/Kotone
big personality!! very people-oriented!! koromaru and her are buddies!! when shes having a real bad time, shes very quiet and expressions turn off
interrupts herself in the middle of conversations all the time. no one knows where shes coming from. her brains is thousands of km ahead of her body
bouncey legs, swingin arms, twirlly skirt, little somersaults! when will she stop? never!
very obvious music stims with her hands and arms! people are like “oh there she goes! happy as usual!” shes listening to minatos heavy metal playlist
switches from exhausted to excited within milliseconds. no one can predict, not even her
SEES has to ask her for context all the time cuz she’ll just continue shit from 2 weeks ago without warning
professionals will assume shes very childish bc of how chipper she is, but she is beyond mature for her age and only feels comfortable enough to have serious conversations if a person has proved themself able to handle it
collects every little thing. her room is a mess and she has to get rid of most of it every time she moves :(
hates cleaning! smells bad, feels bad hhhhhgggg
dont let mitsuru-senpai see her bedroom
gets lost in the middle of conversations with others bc shes thinking about a story connected to one(1) word that was said earlier
 no sense of time and place, she just sees her friends and goes “ah, this is the right place, then” but junpei and akihiko are also lost so now theyre all screwed
Minato/Makoto/Sakuya
no talkies, no walkies
his story in the movies is him literally learning how to function around people he cares for
doesnt get jokes, expressions, body language, empathy, subtlety, metaphors, physical contact, or eye contact. aigis is probably the only person he truly understands right away
he is still nice to people because he doesnt see a reason not to be, but also he has very limited energy so only his senpai and old people get his most polite-kindnesses
cannot describe feelings for the life of him. the team wont know hes injured or sick until hes passed out
everything is too loud, time to drown it out with my loud ass music
rocking and chewing stims, ryoji is the first person to point him out for these subtle stims (not accusingly of course, just general pure curiosity and love for the uniqueness of humanity)
likes to cover his face with whatever is available, lives like a bat in a dark dry cave
will wear anything that has pockets and his blue/gray/black palette
sleepy at all times bc he never has much energy
when he was younger he probably needed a lot of support, especially after his parents died, because he wouldnt communicate like a neurotypical and would shutdown for hours in the middle of school without warning. probably missed a lot of lessons and field trips out of pure overstimulation
eating at all times. no preference, just whatevers closest
his meltdowns probalby include humming whining noises and curling up in a ball, which makes people want to touch him, but that is the LAST thing he wants. put a blanket on him! play some music! do not talk and do not expect him to speak
aigis is the only person who can touch him normally bc her hands are cold and he likes cold
never nude, feels mmmmmmmmm without clothes and probalby wears a full robe in the hotsprings
will not do things that take more than one step w/o someone else walking him thru it, which Same
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skye-maxwell · 4 years
Text
Mostly You
Persona 4 | Souyo | Third year, pre-relationship | Rated F for Fluff
Happy birthday, @livefreeordie13! You are my friend, and I like you a lot! \o/
For prompt #6: “I think about you all the time.”
---
It was Yosuke’s turn to call him today, so Souji sat on the floor of his bedroom, patiently folding paper cranes while he waited. 
They had spoken to each other on the phone nearly every day since Souji had left Inaba, and Souji was grateful that Yosuke always seemed eager to hear from him. Even if it was just a quick call after school on his way to Junes, or while he was drifting off to sleep after a long day—Yosuke made time for Souji, and that meant the world to him.
The ringtone Souji had specifically assigned to Yosuke started playing, and Souji smiled, like he always did. It was a song Yosuke had shared with him to cheer him up when things had been at their worst, and now Souji knew every word and every note of the track. 
“Hey, Yosuke,” Souji greeted warmly, putting his phone on speaker and setting it on his desk so he could keep folding. 
“Hey, Partner!” Yosuke said happily, and Souji smiled again. He would never get tired of that enthusiasm. “What are you up to?” 
“Cranes.”
“Haha, again? Are you trying to set a world record for ‘most paper cranes folded’ or something?” 
“No, but now that you say that, it sounds pretty good. I think that’ll be my goal now.” 
Instead of dismissing the joke like Souji expected him to, Yosuke said, “Well, if anyone can do it, it’s you. I believe in you, Partner!” 
“Thank you,” Souji said dumbly, becoming flustered for a moment before he could think of a better reply. “If I do break the record, you’ll be the first one I invite to the party.”
“The party?” 
“Yeah, to celebrate my success.” 
“Oh man, a party thrown by you? I can see it now. It’s gonna be a total rager,” Yosuke laughed.   
“Of course. It’ll be the most enraged of ragers.”
“That doesn’t even make sense!” 
“Honestly, it would probably just end up being you and me sitting in a room drinking something like, not even alcoholic, and we would try to clink our glasses together and probably spill lemonade everywhere—”
“When did it turn into lemonade?”
“—and then you’d be all ‘Congrats, Partner,’ and yeah, that would probably be it.” 
Souji expected Yosuke to laugh at the image he had created, or to call it lame and throw out ideas for an actual rager… 
“I mean, as long as I’m there with you, I’m down for whatever.” 
Souji dropped his paper crane. 
Why? Souji mentally asked Yosuke, picking his crane back up off the floor. Why must you say such cute things?
Not about to say anything remotely like that out loud, Souji asked, “So what are you doing right now?”
Not seeming to notice the abrupt change of subject, Yosuke answered, “I’m doing homework! Kind of.” 
“Are you just doodling in the margins?” 
“Not just the margins, Partner—the whole paper! Because, you know, there’s no notes on the page…” 
Souji sighed. “Do I need to hang up so you can get your homework done?”
“No! No no no! Please don’t hang up! I’ll actually do it later, I promise!”
“Calm down, I’m not actually gonna hang up on you.” 
“Okay, good.”
“That does remind me, though… Lately I’ve been daydreaming in class a lot. Sometimes I’ll just completely space out, and by the time I space back in, I realize I haven’t been paying attention for an entire lecture.” 
“For real? Did my bad habits rub off on you?”
“Why do you sound like that? What are you doing now?”
“Finished drawing. Balancing a pencil on my nose. Crap! I dropped it. Anyways, you’re supposed to be the good student between the two of us, man! We can’t both be slacking off!” 
“Sorry, Yosuke.”
Before Souji could say anything else, Yosuke suddenly asked, “What do you think about?” 
“Hm?”
“When you’re daydreaming all that time—what are you thinking about?”
“Well… I think about last year a lot, and how I wish I was still there with everyone, and I think about recipes I want to make, and movies I want to see, and what I want to do after high school, and… you. Mostly you, actually,” Souji accidentally admitted. 
“Me? What about me?” 
Now that Souji had let the cat peek its head out of the bag, he wasn’t entirely sure he would be able to keep the rest of it in the bag for much longer. 
“I think about all the crazy and terrible and amazing times we had together last year, and how I wish was still there with you. I think about recipes I want to make for you to try, and the faces you’ll make when you’re eating them. I think about movies I want to see, whether or not you would like them, the discussions we would have after we watched them together… I think about how badly I want to do whatever it takes to have more of you in my life after I finish this stupid third year… Yeah, all the time. I think about you all the time.”
“Partner, that’s… um, unexpected. I’m sure someone like you has better things to think about than me.”
Souji shook his head. “No. I don’t. Not more important than you, no.” 
“You’re exaggerating, right? To make me feel good?” 
“I’m not. Does it make you feel good?”
“Well, yeah, sure it does. Being on someone’s mind makes me feel special, y’know? Especially your mind.”
“You seem surprised, Yosuke. You really don’t have any idea how important you are to me, do you?” 
“I guess not? I don't know, it’s just… hard to believe. Do you know why I always make sure we talk to each other like this? I mean, obviously I don’t want you to be lonely, and I want to make sure you’re doing okay, but also like, I just don’t want you to forget me.”
Souji scoffed, immediately covering his mouth afterwards because he definitely hadn’t meant to do that, even if what Yosuke had said was completely ludicrous. 
Forget you? With the amount of running around you do in my mind, how on earth could I possibly forget you? 
Souji quickly tried to find a way to convey that sentiment to Yosuke in a less creepy way. 
“The only way I could ever forget you is if I had a major head injury, like blunt force trauma, and I forgot everything… or, if I, you know, died.” 
“Partner! Don’t say shit like that!” 
“My problem isn’t forgetting you; my problem is remembering you too much. Seriously, it’s constant. But actually, yeah, no, I don’t want to think of you any less, not really…”
“Heh, is this what it feels like to be flattered? You’re really something else, Partner. Oh hey, I’ve gotta go; my mom’s calling me for dinner.”
“Okay,” Souji sighed, feeling like he had sort of just poured his heart out (in a subtle yet super vulnerable and embarrassing way?), and yet the conversation had not come anywhere close to a satisfying resolution. “Tell her I said hi.” 
“Will do! She’ll be thrilled, haha. She’s actually trying out one of the recipes you left her, so I’ll let you know how it goes. Don’t worry though; it’s definitely not gonna be as good as when you make it.” 
Souji rediscovered his smile, happy that Yosuke would be thinking about him after he hung up—comparing his mother’s cooking against Souji’s own while he ate, remembering the times Souji had made the dish for him, coming up with an evaluation to share with Souji after the meal was done… 
“Your loyalty is appreciated.” 
“All right, Partner, thanks for talking to me.”
“Yosuke? I’m sorry if anything I said was too weird.” 
“All you ever say is weird stuff, man. I’m used to it.” 
“Pfft, okay, bye.” 
“Talk to you later!” 
Yosuke hung up, and Souji finished off the crane he was working on, setting the red paper bird on his desk in a row with several other red cranes. He took a photo and sent it off to Yosuke with the caption: “It’s like your shirt.” 
Satisfied with that, Souji stood up so he could go make his own dinner, but a text from Yosuke stopped him in his tracks. 
Instead of a reply about his picture, he opened up an unexpected picture from Yosuke. 
It was of his notebook, the one he had been doodling in at the beginning of their conversation. 
The first thing that caught his eye was a big-headed (chibi?) doodle of himself (the distinct bowl cut was a dead giveaway) in the middle of the page, holding his sword and wearing his TV World glasses. He also appeared to be on fire? Or maybe that was a representation of Persona power? 
Whatever it was, it was adorable.
Souji’s gaze flitted across the full page, his breaths growing more shallow as he took it all in: Izanagi and Jiraiya doing cool(?) action poses next to each other, a bento box that looked very much like the ones Souji used to prepare for Yosuke every day, a half-melted snowman wearing Souji’s grey scarf and Nanako’s Loveline hat, a Mega Beef Bowl from Aiya’s and stick figure versions of all their friends drowning in it… 
It took Souji a minute to realize it, but every single doodle across the page was somehow related to himself, and the memories he and Yosuke shared together. 
In the bottom corner of the page, one doodle was squeezed in that must have been the last one Yosuke drew. It was the two of them standing side-by-side in front of a house (but it didn’t look like any house that Souji recognized?) with their arms around each other’s shoulders. They were wearing big happy faces, and one of Yosuke’s arms was in the air, as if he was waving. 
The circular sun with squiggly rays coming out of it was in the sky above them, smiling and wearing sunglasses, ironically. There was a thing in front of the house that Souji didn’t recognize at first until he saw the bike next to it; it was a half-pipe. 
Then Souji squinted at another part of the doodle and zoomed in on the image, not quite believing his eyes.
In the front window of the house, there was a cat peeking through, big and fluffy just like Souji liked. 
Was that supposed to be… their house? 
“No way,” Souji whispered to himself.
Then he scrolled down to the caption and completely lost his breath. 
“I think of you too.” 
And with that, Souji’s fate was sealed—he was going to be thinking about Yosuke—his Partner who he was in love with (who thought about him too!)—nonstop for the rest of his life. 
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Next Caller
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“Where the hell is he?”
“Tuesdays aren’t even that popular.”
“He should be happy for the slot after how he blew up on Jimmy last year.”
The comments rippled around the radio station and of course no one was paying any mind to the clock ticking down to the next segment needing to start and with the usual concoction for the arrogant star of the show threatening to just ditch his job for weeks now in hand just watching the clock. Finally having taken up on his threats and in the floundering network rumored to be up for sale soon by the owner you had worked as a glorified maid and assistant to the stuck up few stars on the long time running segments still holding strong.
Over the airways the sign off messages rang and between the exit of the former show’s cast you slipped straight to the empty seat. And mentally gave a ‘fuck it’ to the rules while the other headliners were off to their chosen lunches not willing to take up a second show deciding to let the old star just burn with the blank airtime. Out of everyone you were the oldest one here from the early days of this owner having taken hold of it and even with countless ideas used on air you still hadn’t been given the shot you were promised by said owner for a show of your own.
To the shock of the redhead behind the glass manning the helm of the show now grinning as you eased the headphones in your ears and lowered the mic to a better height and started to speak at her finger wave that you were on proven by the lit up bulb outside your soundproof door. “Hey hey hey, welcome to another blustery day out here in the Misty Mountains and it’s just you and me your dear friend Bunny, devoted with my ear to the ground here to give you all the latest on those lovable Durin boys of ours.” With a tick of the redhead’s brow at the name of the first Dwarf to be woken’s line still thriving today with a great number of sons to carry it on with a heaping amount of funds to boast about if they so wished with their various empires. “And of course all of this coming from the dearest and loveliest of Countesses, Beatrice of the nightshade persuasion on line one now ready to pick up where we left off yesterday.”
The redhead shook her head and you did the same in return lifting a finger tapping a couple buttons on the laptop on the desk now turned to a game of spider solitaire you started a new game on. “Hello Sweetheart, how are you?”
All at once your voice dropped to a deeper tone with a thick Khuzdul accent, “Fine as marble, Darling. Fine as marble. Now,” the redhead smirked as you stole a glance at your open notebook and leaned back in your seat to start playing your game, “Darling, as I left off yesterday, on the eve of the noontide solstice that bastard, I can say bastard, Darling?”
Your voice switched back, “Of course you can.”
A husky exhale sounding of a puff of smoke from a pipe came as the Countess spoke again, “When that bastard Wolsey left me at the alter. Now I was just a young thing but it did so scuff my little whiskered heart when we were seven. Though I suppose it was quite telling of future events to come if you believe in omens and such finicky things. Barely to twenty five years later and I hadn’t seen hide nor hair of the little flake of a boy then out of nowhere I’m halfway to my social economics course in secondary courses and out of nowhere this husk of a menace trying to sneak into some upper classroom on a winding oak branch just plummeted straight in front of my path.” Another husky exhale laced with a deep wry chuckle came after a flitting giggle from you and she continued as the redhead leaned back in her chair folding her fingers in front of her lips to hide her creeping grin.
“Had the nerve to bloody the path in front of my new kitten pumps then gets up, broken nose and all and splatters out cockily, ‘Fancy that, my falling at the feet of an angel.’”
“I think it’s sweet,” You replied in your own giggling voice.
To which she replied, “If you enjoy blood stains on your stocking Darling his sort of fella is the kind for you. No doubt every proclamation of love ended with his blood splattered over me.”
“Mum always said no ounce of love without an ounce of blood.”
“Darling,” Again she chuckled I a husky plume of smoke, “Then I had love by the gallon. Oh it was dreadful at first. Strangers, with one pining away hopelessly without thought of a chance. And then suddenly a year had passed and we were looking down the cannon of romance.”
From a first date all the way to an obscure flirtation that ended in a near brawl you faked a bathroom break for the Countess granting you the hourly adds you had to run through before she could pick up her story again after you had rushed to relieve yourself and race back again. Two hours in and you could see the assistant of the owner dropping by to stare on with a curious smirk of his own at the supposed mastermind behind the voice tripling listeners by the bustling social media outlets blowing up about the supposed Durin lover telling all. Then by the end of the fourth hour the seeming world listening in had mouths watering and groans echoing as you signed off bidding dear Beatrice farewell for the day she gladly returned before you named the station and final sponsor and left your seat to the next set.
Out in the hall with your helmsman Mal, the crimson haired green eyed Dwobbit who chuckled and blushed her way through the whole show asking, “Where the hell did that come from?”
Shaking your head you smoothed your fingers through your waist length forest green curls with your white blonde roots showing marking a need for a touch up soon, brushing them back behind your pointed ears only for them to fall back into your face, “I just, nobody was going to jump on and it would have been dead air.”
Mal chortled flashing you her phone showing you the still growing feed with questions about Bunny and Beatrice. After a dig in your pocket you brought up on your own phone sending off a comment into the feed from a dummy email linking to the social page you had for your Bunny persona that had snippets of conversations with Beatrice and other so far unnamed characters in the story yet to come. More and more notices racked up and at least if nothing else came of this you might have some interest in the book series this story was based on you were off home to keep writing after Mal’s guiding walk down to your cars in the parking garage where you exited the door on foot from a safer exit than the front entrance. ‘Imaginary friend’, that was the job title Bunny held and between the shifts at the five star motel you worked in as a maid you had gotten well into your seventh book of what seemed to be the series never to be published.
Two hours, that was all you had. And passing the coffee shop you normally used packed to the hilt as all the stars of the radio shows on the block seemed to flood there between shows you passed it scouring for any signs of take out cups close to something able to help you through your long shift lasting past midnight.
Cups, check. Five people left the tiny corner shop that you trotted into trying not to feel out of place in a near sheer tank top and worn ink stained jeans with a flannel shirt around your hips in deep green matching your hair, nails and converse. A set of bills from your coffee fund jar folded in your fingers and tilted in your stance the blue eyed serious Dwarves behind the counter seemed to stare at you in the discerning gaze scanning over the large menu. Three people were in front of you and by the time you reached the register you weren’t sure what language it was even in, legibly scrawled out in Khuzdul runes with Hobbitish translations under it and it all still flew over your head.
The fact was painfully obvious for the trio of chiseled men behind the counter, the one with the messy bun in front of you especially as his furrowed gaze landed on you as he rumbled at you, “What can I get you?”
“Um, Surprise me. Just no lavender.” That made his eyes narrow even more for a moment then he turned his gaze to the register and accepted the bills you passed him.
“Name?”
“Pear,” that had his head tilt slightly and you accepted your change stating, “Like the fruit. Cheers.” You said turning to glance over the seats and sigh walking to the far too tall table with a stool seat you practically had to hop up onto as it was clear to half a foot over your hip.
Crossing your ankles your heels rested on the foot pegs and you set down your notebook and opened it. Pulling your unnoticed pen from behind your wall of colored curls you flipped over to one side granting the trio a glimpse of the Elf ears on the Hobbit sized woman clearly granting Thorin his guinea pig for his new tea drink he had made. This quaint little shop, half herb shop run by Balin, with Dwalin teaming up with brother and cousin in both herb and tea shop ends now down a server due to a babysitter fumble bringing Thorin here to fill in himself.
The more he got into the mixture his grin eased out in anticipation wondering just what your life was to fill in the history of his new favored person. One large green mug later his eyes were on you again. Eagerly taking up the delivery of said drink granting him a chance to steal a glimpse at the notebook now coated in a doodle of his cousin Balin grinning as he spoke to his tiny herb sprouts lining them up on their shelves with tiny hearts all around him in your loss for what to write. “That’s good, draw for a living?”
Shaking your head you replied, “Nope. Don’t really make a living.”
His brow inched up and he named his mixture you slid closer to you and snapped a picture of the floating design on the top of it, setting your phone down you lifted the mug stirring a curious twitch of the corner of is lips, “How does that work exactly?” His eyes focusing on your expression as you took a testing sip.
Lowering the cup you said, “I can work up to 16 hours a day, every day, I can afford two meals and a coffee, well, today tea. No car, barely enough for rent in the only town I wasn’t black listed from renting in relatively close to affordable.”
“Black listed?” He muttered in confusion.
“My father has, a reputation, and a lot of enemies, though thankfully a lot of Dwarves don’t give a damn as long as you’re willing to break your knuckles to earn your footing.”
Without pause he asked, “Do you need a job?”
At that you chortled and said lowering your mug from another sip, “Sorry, I have two. I doubt I could work here, it is best I don’t work around heat sources when I’m tired, which I would be. Not that I wouldn’t jump at the chance to find out the spectacular truth behind all those coffee and tea shop fantasies everyone writes about. If I do get fired though, which could be a possibility after the stunt I pulled today, I will definitely take you up on that.”
In a sharp exhale he eyed the mug then pulled a card from his pocket and the pen from his apron pocket he wrote something down on the back of the card he then slid closer to you. “I’ll cut you a deal, every day you post a review on my drink choices I’ll pay you 20 bucks.”
Playfully you quipped, “I can barely feed myself what am I going to do with deer at my place?” Deepening his smirk in the extension of his hand, “You got yourself a deal there my personal Mug Dealer.”
“Mug dealer?” He rumbled back. “People hear that and they might assume something.”
“Ooh, like what? You might be the Mafioso of mugs? King pin of peppermint owns this block, beware.”
He rolled his eyes, “I have to get back, just pass on your username when we take your mug, Nickname Queen.”
Again you mumbled, “Closer to the other end of the Cinderella Spectrum there Mug Dealer.”
In a glance back he purred, “Thorin.”
You nodded lifting your phone finding their page saying as Dwalin passed bringing another their choice, “Got my early morning fix at the Arkenstone. Only thing tighter than the perfect zing of the X special was server Thorin’s shirt.” A snorting laugh came from Dwalin on his way back while Thorin turned to you with prickling cheeks and you mumbled, “Draft number one, I’ll get it right. Catchy and alluring for others comin’ up.”
The cousins muttered to one another and you lingered around finishing your mug and taking notes in your notebook until your notice of the time had you approached the counter and with a playful glint in his eyes Thorin offered a bill asking, “What’d you come up with?”
“MugMafioso, my new account for this. Don’t worry, kept my thoughts on your clothes to myself.” He insisted on handing you the bill as Dwalin chuckled seeing your self drawn icon of a rabbit in a pinstripe suit behind a desk holding a smoking tea pot. “Have fun, off to work. Thanks again.”
His eyes followed you in your trot out the door then looked down at the review under the picture stirring up a few notifications at first steadily growing in the next half hour until the first person came in flashing the message asking about the special adding more reviews of their own.
.
Black with deep green lacy accents the uniform dress waited for you in your locker and easily you changed into the dress and left your tolerated green converse on then wound your hair up with a pair of wing decorated hair pins joined by strands of beads. Room to room you cleaned your way through the top floors carefully detailing each of the suites and invisible woman-ing your way through the celebrities. A trait you had been picked up on at an encounter with a naked soap opera star lost and drunk in the elevator you helped back into his room and managed to avert the press who had been called by his now ex who had locked him out and left the hotel promoting you to the ranks of the trusted in the elite floors. Still a part time assistant when around the most demanding celebs who never left their room you managed through at a higher wage that had freed you from your third job.
Findis, the simple name stating which clan owned the internationally known hotel chain you were employed by. Only flashes of the woman married to the man set to take over within the next decade was your glimpse of anyone not bearing the Findis golden hair. A raven haired heavily side burned Dam with piercing blue eyes who seemed to pass by you like you were nothing more than air. Not intentionally or worse than others, just too busy to bother with anyone else most days in holding her own role until her latest surprise pregnancy would take her out of work for a time.
Nothing out of the ordinary really happened yet when you had punched out you turned your phone back on mid hour long subway ride and saw the notice from the radio show that your show slot was being picked up on a trial basis and you were needed in the office in a few hours to sign the paperwork.
In a plop you had finally collapsed onto your bed in your so called apartment of a closet loft to rummage up as much sleep as possible until you were forced to wake up again. A handshake or a pat on the head would have been less of a brush off than you had gotten. No compliments, merely a sighing exchange from the aid in charge of securing the documents who gave you the schedule for the three day a week job coming with a stunning five grand raise a week over your barely two grand a month job. The new check such a scoff worthy amount to the former star barely a fifth of his former check you could live months off of just one of them. It was a big change but you weren’t going to change, your finances wouldn’t change and every single cent over your usual amount would be set aside in your lint trap of a savings account for some sort of umbrella or parachute in the future.
Noon however again had you back in the same tea shop finding the dame mohawked man stepped forward asking, “Up for another experiment?”
You nodded, “Just no lavender.” Passing him the bill on your way to your same table you settled at and noticed Thorin coming out of the back room at Dwalin’s call drawing his eye right to you. It didn’t take long and signing into your MugMafioso account now with a handful of followers for your singular posting soon to be two as Thorin brought over a second testing mug he set down asking, “Any news on that need for a job application?”
“Um, I actually got a new project at work. They don’t really have much faith in how I’ll pull it off though. So I’ll keep you posted there my trusty Mug Dealer.”
Again he smirked rolling his eyes stepping back, “Enjoy your tea.”
“Yes, sir,” you replied to his back making him shake his head again on his walk back to the counter as you snapped a picture of the drink you sipped on while Dwalin tried to nudge Thorin back to talk to you some more. The pattern was starting to build and with your mug returned another trading of smirks came on your way back to the hotel trying to mentally prep the outline for your next day on air.
 * Mal x Fili/Kili *
There was no secret that Thorin had blushed, a stolen picture of it by Balin had cemented the fact and his aid to a Damsel on the verge of Distress was shared as well. The elder Durins rarely dipped their toes in romance and while Frerin was off chasing his racing dreams Dwalin was the closest after Dis to have found a possible life partner.
Two years the tattoo parlor across the street had drawn his eye, more for the tree sleeve coated Hobbit heading The Acorn dubbed shop. A first timid drop in to get a ladybug on the side of one of his fingers to excuse his out of nowhere stop into the shop was the start of a line of them eventually across his wrist forming the rune of his niece’s name. From there an ‘accidentally’ left discount card on a promotion had the curious Hobbit dropping by himself hooking him as well into a well excused path to see more of the burly guy sharing the same magnetic pull he felt.
Three months they had been living together now and with that came the try to mingle family lines. A troublesome task as Bilbo now had custody of his Nephew Frodo just barely three years old expanding their own mini family. The daughter of his cousin however upon their buying a home together had taken up his old flat above the shop and helped to pay the rent by working part time in the shop on the paperwork and temporary image printing to ease the work of the tattoo crew between shifts at a radio station. Among her tasks was to change the artwork on the sign out front and while the shop was closed down allowing Bilbo and Dwalin a brunch with family she wobbled her way onto the rickety ladder to lower the locking hook for the sign.
“Damn, rickety-, why do we-,” A sharp gasp came and on a stop to pick up a special drink for his mother Fili trolled in front of Kili now on his phone double checking the schedule to get back onto the racing schedule with Frerin later this evening as part of his pit crew.
Quicker then he’d thought possible he’d caught the Dwobbit now with cheeks redder than her hair and green eyes, even in their frightened gaze over the pair they were stunning and once down a fumble for her name had the pair grinning and flashing their dimples at her only worsening the struggle. A shout from Dwalin had them glancing down the street and Kili offering her his phone, “We have to go, and sadly won’t be back in town till Friday, but can we have your number?”
‘Su-, sure,” she stammered out and punched in her number passing it back, “Oh, I don’t know your names.”
That had the pair smirking at the hopefully honestly clueless woman, “Fili and Kili, at your service. We’ll text you later, My Lady.” Trotting off as she nodded again and sighed turning inside to bring out the new poster for the sign she opened to pull the old one out then up again she wobbled and managed to secure the sign up again then head inside to give the shop a good clean readying for the afternoon shift coming in later.
.
Sighing heavily Fili plopped into the chair beside Kili making Dwalin day, “We all got plans for after this boys. Shouldn’t take long.”
Fili sighed out again, “Not like we can do anything anyways we’re off for a race and won’t be able to see her a whole week..”
Frerin’s head cocked with interest at the latest swooning Durins, “Her who?” Slightly uncertain how the pining would effect the pit crew if they were to lose their focus at the race.
In a dreamy sigh Kili propped his chin in his palms laying all his weight on the table in front of him with Fili leaning against the arm of his chair closer to his brother, “Mal.”
Dwalin nodded, “Uh huh, and what does this Mal do?”
The pair shrugged and the younger brother blew a string of his chocolate curls from his face that had swung free of his small bun, “She was hanging a sign at the tattoo shop across from the tea shop.”
Dwalin’s lips pursed, “Hmm,” fighting not to blush in saying as plainly as he could, “Must be Bilbo’s cousin’s girl. Took up the flat over the shop from us.”
That perked the boys up and Fili said, “Yes!”
Kili, “You could talk us up while we’re gone!”
Dwalin hummed out, “Doesn’t work all the time though. Just a part time gig by what I could tell. I missed that convo while Frodo was loose in the garden.”
Frerin smirked glancing at Thorin who sat down and gruffly said to his clean shaven brother as his short beard seemed to bristle in his wordless show he was ready to defend himself, “Don’t.”
Frerin smirked, “I didn’t say a thing!”
Thorin reaches out grabbing one of the bottles of juice on the table, “Don’t.”
Dwalin, “That’s right Rin, Thorin isn’t swooning.”
Thorin muttered lifting his bottle to his lips, “Exactly.”
Vili smirked saying, “Absolutely not, all business with the MugMafioso.”
Trying not to chuckle as Dis entered and took her seat, asking herself in a smoothing of her hand over her blouse after undoing her coat jacket while sitting, “How did you manage to gain this new following again, Thorin?”
Thorin lowered his bottle and sent a half hearted glare at Balin who smirked in saying, “He’s become a mug dealer.”
Thorin grumbled as Dwalin chuckled saying, “Pretty successful one too to have caught a partnership with the Mug Mafia.” The table chuckled and Dwalin patted his cousin’s shoulder, “Oh come on, fine, fine. Cute Lass walks in saying ‘surprise me’ to Thorin when they got stumped on the menu. Bit of flirting,” Dwalin lifted a finger silencing Thorin in his mouth opening to talk, “On her part, and he finds out she’s had a bad day at work. Said she might get fired so he offers her a job if she does get fired, then says he’ll pay her a 20 for every review she posts to the social page. She made a new account and it kicks off.”
Thorin, “She has two jobs no car and needed a hand, nothing romantic.”
Balin coughed out, “Lies.” Then shook his head in a glance at Thorin who glared at him again, “Allergies.” Taking a bottle himself then coughed again, “Smitten.” And took a big swing of the bottle he opened smirking as he did while the others chuckled and Thorin smoothed a hand over his face and settled back in his chair while their parents and grandparents came in.
Beside them Bofur and Bifur both sat down to the left of Thror across from their matriarch Niro, the latter who looked at her husband in his saying, “It goes without saying we’ve heard about the radio show yesterday.” At the boys’ brows inching up he added, “At least most of us. Now it doesn’t seem to be factual, though a great deal of the details are stunningly accurate. Bofur, have you found anything?”
He nodded and said, “Aye, well this ‘Bunny’ who was talking with the ‘Countess Beatrice’ didn’t seem to work at the station or any other before yesterday. The slot was for that Belby guy, but he didn’t show up so it seems it was a last minute fill in, even if it made it seem like it was continuing a former interview.”
Niro, “That’s it?”
Bifur raised a finger, “Ma’am if I may, from what I was able to find, I did locate a similar draft for a novel someone by the pen name Bunny tried to have picked up a few years ago that has been gathering dust after being circulated around. It has a few rough details of the same story.”
Diaa, “So it’s a story then?”
Bofur said, “It seems the Belby guy left without notice, just didn’t show up. Must have been a last minute add to test how it would go. Certainly had plenty of time to tweak the story and dig for history on our clan.”
Bifur, “With the draft there was a notice there was approval from Gorgo years before on the idea to use the Durin name for the copyright issues. We dug up the notes on what plot points were listed to be included and it does seem like a mellow-drama with a seedy crime edge bubbling up later on in the series. Which it was meant to be a series.”
Dis’ brows furrowed, “Why wasn’t it picked up then?”
Bofur shrugged, “Just a handwritten note on the cover ‘Shelve’ nothing else. Looks like someone doesn’t like Bunny, Gorgo had been clocked as reviewing this case biweekly for any updates. It is quite addictive. Clearly as everyone has found out.”
Bifur nodded, “I read it three times. Pretty good.”
Thror nodded then said, “One thing to do then. Send it to Dain, see what deal we can work out with this Bunny.” He couldn’t help but smirk adding, “Get Gorgo her book. No wonder she’s been so book crazed these last years.” Thinking back to her eagerness to scour the incoming author lists for drafts in their family publishing firm they had started in their youth now the largest Dwarven publishing firm around.
Bofur glanced at his brother in a silent debate on who would share the worse news making Niro ask, “What else aren’t you saying?”
Bifur cleared his throat and said, “Well, um, you see, I pulled the file on the author,”
She nodded and Thror asked, “And?”
Bifur continued, “Someone used white out all over the only hard copy and erased it from the system.”
That made the Durins collectively huff and Thrain said, “Dain can muscle it out. Someone’s bound to remember. Worst comes to worst we’ll send Gorgo after them. Not even Gloin could pull her off them if he wanted to.”
Dis, “If need be we could always contact the actors on the radio show and see who their source is and work that angle.” Earning agreeing nods stirring up the next few issues and family announcements of schedules before they split up to head back to their normal routines.
Pt 2
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