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soolarity · 2 years

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Five Hargreeves SFW Alphabet

Five Hargreeves x gn!Reader - 5.6k words

Warnings: general spoilers for season 3, mild violence, food mentions, pretty angsty stuff five went through

Summary: An alphabetic collection of Five Hargreeves headcanons before, during, and after the apocalypse with you.

Here's my Masterlist!

A/n: Another work in the same month?? what a shock! This is sort of redemption for the sheer angst of my first five fic; out of time. I had so much fun writing this! But I’m also drained because holy fuck it’s a lot of headcanons. If you do want to know more headcanons though about five, feel free to send a request or an ask in my inbox! I’ll be more than happy to write short Five headcanons because he’s just so fun to write. Anyways, enjoy and please leave comments<3

A – Affection

“how do they give or show affection?”

He would definitely be closed off and distant at first and especially around other people. It would take a long while, possibly even years to gain his affection. But once he does, he shows it through acts of service, small yet still important. Maybe he’d make you another cup of coffee or your preferred beverage, or he’d remember small details and interests about you that he’d bring up later on. He would also bring with souvenirs from wherever he goes, pushing it into your hands and grumbling that he had it and didn’t want it even though he actually bought it specifically for you. Behind doors, he would occasionally show physical affection especially when he’s stressed or jittery and needs someone to ground him to reality.

B – Beauty

“what would they find beautiful in their s/o?”

He would definitely find intellect beautiful. It doesn’t matter if you’re academically gifted or more street smarts, he would just love an s/o that is smart and knowledgeable about their passions even if it didn’t exactly align with his. Although he would appreciate it if he had someone to talk and debate about math equations and physics to, he also appreciates someone who listens to him madly rambling and add input into his ideas, no matter how relevant or not.

C – Comfort

“how would they comfort them? how would they like to be comforted?”

Five spent his entire childhood homeschooled in the academy and his adulthood in the isolating apocalypse so needless to say his empathy and comforting skills aren’t the greatest. He would be a listener, maybe not the best because he would interrupt to give (well-meant) solutions to your problems. He wouldn’t know how to act through physical comfort at first, instead he’d hover around you and sit beside you like a cat. After a long, long while he would be open to hugs but you’d usually have to initiate it. He’d grumble about how your tears would ruin his shirt but he doesn’t move away.

would have a hard time accepting comfort from others at first since he had to basically deal with the apocalypse by himself for more than 40 years and then the whole commission spiel. He gets antsy with any kind acts at first, expecting it to be fueled by a deeper nefarious motive. Once he does actually accept comfort, he’d appreciate someone who listens to him earnestly because most of the things he says sounds surreal to other people and he isn’t often taken seriously. He would be averse to physical comfort at first, nearly going to fight mode the first time he receives a hug, but later on he wouldn’t mind a hand on his shoulder or in his own hand, especially during difficult apocalypse flashbacks because it grounds him to reality.

D - Dance

“do they like to dance? how would they dance?”

Five would absolutely know how to dance, after all, Reginald forced them to learn how to formally dance in their rigorous training. Would he like to dance though? Definitely not sober, he’d have to at least be halfway through blackout drunk to even consider dancing. Or at the end of the world, seeing as how he had both at Sloane and Luther’s wedding. Once he has enough liquor in his system to make a regular person barely upright, he’d be pulling out the moves left and right. 50’s rock n’ roll, salsa, waltz, you call it he’ll dance it. Well, before he throws up from dizziness and passes out in an elevator. Outside of drunk dancing, I think he’d only dance if it’s required in the mission to blend in with the crowd or if he truly feels safe and in a sappy mood, he’d slowly sway with you once the apocalypse is finally over and his family and you are safe.

E - Excitement

“how do they act when they’re excited?”

He would vibrate at a volatile speed and a single poke to him would send him bouncing around the walls—I’m kidding. He would definitely be jittery though, bouncing his leg nonstop and grinning happily that’s slightly also unnerving due to the menacing glint in his eyes. He had lost hope countless of times during the apocalypse so he learned to stop hoping and being excited, but once he could finally be excited about something, he would stop at nothing to achieve it.

F – Future

“what are their plans in the future?”

13-year-old him would have probably planned to successfully implement time travel and become the world’s greatest professor or physicist in a prestigious university but 58-year-old Five wants nothing more than to retire. For the past 41 years, his future plans had just been to survive, figure out the equation, and go back home, he didn’t think about the rest. Now once the apocalypse is finally resolved, he’d plan to retire from it all. He’d love to travel around and do road trips with you while also nagging every time about any inconvenience like an old man (because he is). He doesn’t see himself settling down and having a child, mostly because he think’s he’s quite old to have a child and the unresolved family trauma still haunts him every time. He wouldn’t mind getting married, he’d love the tax benefits. Maybe the two of you would be the constantly traveling relatives of Claire, giving her cool presents and souvenirs from your travels together. And after a year of travelling around the world, he would want a suburban house with a picket fence and a nice wide garden. He’d have a field day gardening, planting flowers, and maybe even building a koi pond in the corner.

G – Gifts

“what gifts would they give you?”

He’d give you things you randomly said you needed or wanted some days ago and hand it over to you without a word. It could be a hobby gift or a handy item for your job or maybe something related to your interests. He’d also give you things that he likes and just pass it off as a gift even though he’d probably use it more than you would. He would also gift you acts of service like teleporting to get an item you missed or doing a chore you’ve been procrastinating to do without you asking.

H – Hold

“how would they hold you? how would they like to be held?”

He usually keeps his distance towards others, respecting their boundaries and at minimum only touching them to push or pull them in a certain direction out of frustration. He had done a lot of fucked up shit with his hands so he isn’t the type to give pats or hugs in affection. Although a scenario where he would be most likely to hold you would be if either of you were in a near-death encounter. It can be almost getting shot by commission agents or the impending apocalypse but he would roam over you with his hands, checking frantically for any injuries before holding you desperately. He’d grasp the back of your shirt tightly and slump over you in relief and desperation that you were alive and whole. After retiring from the apocalypse, there would be more fleeting touches such as a brush of hands or a protective hand on your back.

As to how he would like to be held, he definitely wouldn’t want to be treated like fragile glass. He’s a 58-year-old assassin, he doesn’t need pity or caution (or at least that’s what he’d say). Five would appreciate a solid hold, one that isn’t hesitant or scared that they might break him into pieces. He wants someone to hold him together and tether him to the ground on the occasion he jumps too far. He’d appreciate hand holding and the occasional hug when things get too much. As for cuddling, Five doesn’t have the time to cuddle in the midst of the apocalypse, but after successfully retiring without another apocalypse or the Commission hunting him down he’d be more open to the idea. The years of isolation definitely made him touch starved so the first time the two of you cuddled he’d toss and turn to adjust to the new sensation of being held. He’d like to be the big spoon but when he gets nightmares (which are frequent) he secretly craves to be the little spoon. He’d also cling to your side like a koala in his sleep with his face in the crook of your neck but vehemently denies cuddling you once he wakes up.

I – Ideal

“what’s their ideal date like?”

Due to the apocalypse, he has no time to consider planning any dates with an s/o, but after he retires, he would plan a simple yet cheesy dinner date under candle light. He doesn’t have much ideas about dating and courting due to being stuck in the apocalypse since the start of his teenagerhood but he distantly remembers having small dinner dates with his previous wife Delores whenever he’d scavenged a particularly good wine or food in the rubble. Now that he’s with you, he’d definitely struggle a bit with the whole dating thing but just give him a nudge in the right direction and he would quickly pick it up. He'd like private dates such as dinners or movie marathons at home to catch up on all the media he couldn’t enjoy before. He would be less open to public dates such as museum dates or zoo outings or pottery and painting classes, since he would always be hypervigilant and on the look out for any Commission goons despite being retired, or he’d pick a fight with the museum curator or art instructor. It's a flaw he works to fix but Five feels most at ease with only you in the safety of your home.

J – jealousy

“do they get jealous easily?”

Five would have an immense amount of trust for his s/o to the point where he’d consider you his close confidant, best friend, and partner, so he wouldn’t get jealous easily. He trusts that whoever you interact with that it’s just platonic and just in case the other person did indeed have other motives such as flirting with your or something, he would trust you to put a stop to it or walk away from it. If by chance you were oblivious to the other person’s advances, he would step in civilly and bluntly tell the other person that you’re taken, not out of jealousy but more out of concern for your safety. If by the smallest chances you actually flirt back (which is a dumb decision honestly) he would just immediately cut to the chase and tell you ‘what the fuck are you doing?’ Depending on whether it was just your accidental over friendliness or something other he would either tell you that he didn’t like it and it seemed like you were actually interested in the other person or he would break the relationship with you if you weren’t actually faithful to him.

K – Kisses

“how would they kiss you? how frequently?”

Five isn’t really comfortable with PDA so kisses weren’t frequent, especially with the threat of the apocalypse onto them. At most he’d kiss your temple or forehead quickly as a habit before turning back to whatever equations he’d be solving. Although if Five was drunk, that was a completely different story. Five is an unpredictable drunk, but most often than not he’d toss all of his pride out of the window and show affection openly to you even in front of all of his siblings. Behind closed doors, he would be more comfortable kissing you. He’d be fond of temple and forehead kisses or if you were taller than him, he would do hand kisses, especially on your palms if he was feeling extra sentimental (which was a rare occurrence).

As for you kissing him, he would turn tomato red if you ever tried to kiss him in front of others and grumble or yell in embarrassment. Don’t take it to heart though, as much as he’d love to keep up his cold and unaffectionate act around others, he’d melt into a puddle when no one’s looking.

L - Love language

“how would they show that they love you? what love language do they enjoy to receive?”

Five’s language would be acts of service. Usually, he considers his time very precious and he always tries to make the most out of everything, discarding anything else that wasn’t relevant to his mission. For you though he would take time out of his day to check up on you and your well-being, especially in grueling times like running from an apocalypse. He’d also use his powers to fetch items for you and always arrive on time whenever you asked.

For receiving love language, he likes it when you spend quality time with him. It doesn’t matter if its brainstorming the next plan or frantically scribbling formulas on walls or drinking coffee in the morning in the kitchen. Five really treasures small quiet moments where there is nothing he can do but sit down with you and accompany each other in silence or soft conversation. It’s a rare break from the bumbling chaotic tornado that was his family.

M - Melt

“what are the things you do that makes them melt?”

He’s a tough person to get through and crack, but one thing that makes him melt every time is watching you fight. The reason why he would have you as an s/o in the first place is because he trusts you enough with his secrets, his heart, and his mind. He is constantly worrying about whether his family was alive or not and whether they could live beyond a few days, so seeing you fight and defend yourself puts his mind at ease and reassures him that he chose the right person to trust. Five also melts whenever he sees you interact with anyone of his siblings, whether you’re entertaining Klaus’ insane tangents, bond with Luther over his records collection or softly chatting with Viktor about anything, he adores it when you get along with his siblings and he definitely sees you as a part of the umbrella family now.

Another much more niche sight that makes his cold walls fall down and his insides uncharacteristically gooey is watching you stand in front a wall full of complex equations with your back turned from him. He doesn’t know specifically why the sight of you frowning in confusion at the lines of numbers affected him much but it took him a while to recover and stop looking at you with adoration. Although you might have not understood the complex formulas he’s written out, you try as you roam your eyes throughout the whole surface. It was like as if he exposed his entire heart and mind to you in a tangled-up ball of equations and you’re trying to untangle it, which made it even more complicated and caught you within the threads. Five often thinks back to it with a fond smile before frowning again once Klaus asks him what he’s smiling about.

N – Nickname

“what would they call you? what would they like to be called?”

Five has always been blunt in refusing any other name ever since Grace gave them ‘regular’ names when they were children. For some reason Five sticked to him and he refused to change it. He wasn’t even that hung up on the whole ranking system either, he couldn’t care less who was the leader or number 1 among them. Five just had a certain ring to it. So, he’d be generally opposed to any over-the-top nicknames like ‘baby’ or ‘sweetheart’ and hearing ‘darling’ gives him flashbacks to the Handler and he’d rather not relive the things that woman did to him. He unwillingly has nicknames from Klaus, always unamused at whatever new name the séance would create for him. Although after a long time of being with him and possibly in retirement he wouldn’t mind ‘honey’ or ‘hon’. It was sweet but not overly and he responded to it whenever you say it from a room in your shared home. Once though when you accidentally slipped up and called him honey in front of his siblings his ears turned firetruck red in embarrassment but teleported to you nevertheless. Allison and Lila never let him live it down.

O – Obvious

“how obvious would they make their love for you?”

To the untrained eye, it was subtle, almost silent. He’d casually brush arms with you or hand you an item when you asked. He’d steal glances at you but he was a trained assassin so he was sneaky. To his siblings who know him and his habits well though, it is more obvious than Five would like it to be. Diego would catch Five’s eyes sometimes lingering a bit longer than usual on you. Viktor often saw Five prepare coffee exactly for two people. Lila once barged in a room searching for Stanley to catch the two of you talking in soft voices and softer looks, she had never once seen Five so un-hostile before. The entire family watched in a mix of fondness, shock, and slight disgust (lovingly) as Five became softer and more considerate around you.

P – Pets

“would they want pets? what pets would they have?”

Five hasn’t really though about adopting a pet before because he was so preoccupied with apocalypse after apocalypse after another apocalypse. When he finally retires though, having a pet wouldn’t be his top priority but he wouldn’t be entirely against it either. He would be the type to have unusual pets such as reptiles or maybe fish (although with Carmichael, maybe not fish). In the comics, Five has a small dog named Mr. Pennycrumb so he would most likely adopt a small dog, maybe a senior dog, and it would be the exact opposite of Five. There’s just something about seeing Five, the greatest assassin in the entire timeline, with a tiny hyperactive dog that couldn’t weigh more than 18 pounds. He is neutral towards animals but he would absolutely have a soft spot for Mr. Pennycrumb and let him run around his garden even though a flower will be uprooted by the excited tornado that is Mr. Pennycrumb. Five would carry Mr. Pennycrumb often and reluctantly let him back to the ground once he realized he needed his hands to do something. A favorite past time of Mr. Pennycrumb and Five is teleport-chase where Mr. Pennycrumb would chase Five as he teleports around the house until the both of them wear each other out.

The Hargreeves family would definitely get whiplash when you bring Mr. Pennycrumb to any holiday family gatherings. Klaus would rub his eyes repeatedly, questioning whether the dog was real or another hallucination, Luther first thought it was a stray dog that randomly waltzed into the mansion and try to adopt Mr. Pennycrumb before being heavily threatened by Five. Allison would just stare in shock while Claire would adore Mr. Pennycrumb, spoiling the dog with endless pets and belly rubs.

Q – Quiet

“how are quiet moments with them?”

Quiet moments are rare when all Hargreeves siblings are gathered together, some mischief or argument would always spiral into a rambunctious event. Fortunately, Five had the power to teleport anywhere he pleases which made it much easier to sneak away from Diego and Klaus fighting over a donut and into a much calmer place. If it was outside, you and Five would sit beside each other in silence, he would drink in his surroundings, bask at the intact buildings and sulfur-free blue sky, and mostly you, alive and breathing. Indoors, he would have some sort of physical contact with you, whether it be a hug, holding hands, or laying his head on your lap. Your presence away from other prying eyes made Five more relaxed and less likely to bounce around and wear himself out by thinking too much about everything. Your scent and your touch would silence every anxious intrusive thought that dared to interrupt his moment of peace.

R – Romantic

“how romantic are they?”

Five isn’t a romantic, he doesn’t know shit about modern dating and pet names and PDA, the closest he’s ever had to romance was his previous wife Delores but she was a coping mechanism he formed to keep himself from going insane in the apocalypse, and she was a mannequin. So, Five isn’t the most romantic, sappy, sentimental person, that title goes to Luther, but he when he loves, he loves the deepest and most intensely. He wouldn’t hesitate to kill anyone for you, hell he won’t hesitate to die for you. When Five Hargreeves loves, he loves them with everything he has, even if it meant little to nothing but himself and his weary hands. He would risk everything to make sure you’re alive and safe and he wouldn’t know how to function if something happened to you. Although he isn’t the most perfect romantic partner, he would get the sun and moon and every star in the sky for the person he loves.

S – Safe

“how safe would they feel around you?”

Five was overly cautious to the point of being almost paranoid constantly and for a good reason. He had to fight ever since he was a child and endure the tortuous training from Reginald, survive by himself in an apocalypse for the other half of his life, then kill for a shady organization he had no choice but to join in. Now he was back with his family but constantly under threat of some sort of apocalypse and the Commission at the same time, he hadn’t had a second to relax and feel safe. Whenever Five was around you, as much as he’d like to say he’s comfortable around you, there is always a part of his mind overworking in the background for any threats or surprises. It would take him a while after the apocalypse to fully relax, but luckily with you by his side, he willed himself to ease into life without constantly looking behind him for a bullet or a knife. He would feel safe whenever your hand is in his, giving him comfort despite running away from enemies. He would feel safe when your arms are around him, fully trusting you not to stab him in the back like so many others did before. He would feel safe together with you in your shared home with Mr. Pennycrumb after the apocalypse. It almost felt too good to be true, almost like a dream or a figment of his imagination before you’d show him it was reality by squeezing his hand and pecking his cheek.

T – Take care

“how would they take care of you if you’re injured or sick? how would you take care of them?”

He’d immediately nag you about not taking care of yourself, which is bold considering he has been running for 45 years on nothing but caffeine, adrenaline, and sheer spite. He’d immediately wrestle you to bed, confining you until you get better and you know that there’s no way you could sneak out of the door without him immediately teleporting in front of you and bringing you back to bed arrest. Five would rush immediately to patch you up or place a cooling towel on your forehead. Even though his actions might be a bit rough, the concern and care bleeds through his actions and you don’t mind if he dabs antiseptic a little bit too hard or if he covers you with a blanket a little bit too tightly.

Due to the Hargreeves’ enhanced physiology, they rarely get sick. Oftentimes it would only be a small cough that would last less than a day but once a year they fall with the worst cold known to man. Five has it the worst, especially with how the stubbornly pushes himself to the limit until his eventual crash and burn. It would be difficult to take care of Five, he constantly tries to teleport himself out of bed until he falls from exhaustion. Luckily in retirement he has all the time in the world to recover and heal, even though you have to remind him more often than not. As a child he was picky with food whenever he was sick, often being forced to eat Grace’s chicken soup after numerous futile attempts to reject it. Now with you, Five eats whatever soup you make without hesitation, thankful that he had you to take care of himself even though he found it hard sometimes to accept it. Five would be torn in being extra clingy and wanting to cuddle with you and wanting to stay 50 miles away from you because he’d be scared that you’d catch the cold that he had and also become sick because of him. Until eventually he gives in and surrenders to the cuddling (you fall ill after a few days like how he predicted and he returns the favor of nursing you back to health).

U – Unique

“what is a trait that is unique to them?”

He is an absolute neat freak. He loves having all of his items in order and would dust everything until not a single spec of dust was left. When the Hargreeves’ visited your shared home (much to Five’s dismay), they were impressed by the sheer cleanliness and organization of the place, almost resembling an Ikea display house more than an actual lived-in home. Ever since Five was a child he was one if not the most organized of the umbrella children. His childhood room was immaculate every time, not even a single physics text book out of place. You would have assumed for it to be an adult’s room if it weren’t for the toy airplane model hung on the ceiling and the small twin sized bed. Since the apocalypse, his cleaning habits have gone to possibly concerning levels. He had to survive in a desolate apocalypse, anything sanitary or clean of rubble was a luxury Five rarely encountered. So, once he was able to retire with you and have his own home, he made sure to take care of everything and never once take the intact house for granted. The only times Five would be caught with scattered items or a messy environment was when he was under extreme stress. Five would be too preoccupied in stopping the apocalypse to care about cleaning any mess and would just start scribbling on the walls frantically. Luckily you picked up on the habit and only stocked up on washable or whiteboard markers in your home, just in case Five needed to go on another math marathon.

W – Wish

“what is their greatest wish?”

Five’s greatest wish is for his family to live long, healthy, and happy lives. It was what kept him going through all those years, to have the opportunity to warn his siblings about the future and save them from their deaths. As much as he loves to complain about his brothers or roll his eyes at his sister, he would sacrifice anything for them, and he technically already did. Five’s survival instincts were held together by the glue that was the thoughts of his family, it had been a long 41 years and it would be more than impressive if he hadn’t thought about giving up at least once, but he kept on running back against the tide of time to save the ones he loves.

X – Xmas

“how would they spend their holidays with you?”

Five’s memory of his childhood was foggy, it was impressive he even remembered bits and pieces of it considering his age and the trauma from his childhood, but Five never once remembered celebrating Christmas as a child in the Umbrella Academy. Reginald was a man (or monster) of logic and thought that holidays based off of religion and culture was unnecessary and stupid so he just remembered spending Decembers with his siblings looking wistfully at strangers decorating across the street or walking with gifts in hand.

In the apocalypse, Five had no reason to celebrate holidays, he barely even knew what day it was half of the time. He tried to keep track of time through clocks and calendars but no other calendars went beyond 2019 and most clocks were broken or eventually stopped working. Five didn’t want to waste resources celebrating alone in the apocalypse, so he eventually forgot of it entirely.

After retiring, Five had to adjust to normal life again, but not alone. You had introduced him to celebrating milestones and holidays. You made hot coco (although Five found it too sweet and swapped it out with coffee with a festive whipped cream), you watched cheesy hallmark movies, and you decorated your home. You had also convinced the Hargreeves siblings to arrange another gathering despite the horrors that might unleash having all Hargreeves siblings in the same place once more. Five and you were finally the ones decorating their house across the street and walking home with heavy bags filled to the brim with gifts. Five surprisingly was an amazing gift giver. He had a talent in knowing exactly what the other person wished for, whether the gift was an item said in a passing conversation or something useful to them. In the celebration Five was lovingly suffocated (Five’s wording) by his siblings for his gifts and most importantly his presence that brought the group together as a family.

Y – Yearn

“what do they do when they miss you?”

Five was bitterly familiar with the feeling of yearning, he had a whole 45 years to be friends with it in the apocalypse and in the Commission. He had a love-hate relationship with it, if you will. With that many years of yearning for his family and his past, Five had developed a system to overcome it. Was it a healthy one? Probably not. He would toss himself into his work, figuring out equations or assassinating targets to distract himself from the aching pain of longing. For you, Five surprisingly hasn’t had much opportunities to yearn yet. Although Five doesn’t look like he’s clingy, he most definitely is. Wherever you are, he also appears. He cannot be further than a 4-meter distance away from you. When in the rare case that he is, he tosses his entire focus onto his work and his mission again, frantically finding the quickest way back to you. Once you finally return from what you had to go to, he’d visibly slump in relief. He would casually ask you how it went before checking if you had been injured in any way, but internally he would be so relieved that he wouldn’t have to yearn for you to come back because you were back and you were with him.

Z – Zzz

“how do they sleep?”

He has two sleep modes, A. He sleeps with basically his eyes open and even the smallest noise will immediately send him to fight or flight mode, or B. He sleeps like an old man and is dead to the world until 6am when he punctually wakes up every single time.

The first sleeping habit wasn’t fully there during his academy training childhood but it fully hammered into him once he worked as the Commission’s temporal assassin. He had to be ready at any moment and never let his guard slip, but if often lead him to be more worn out and tired. In his more youthful days, he would’ve turned sloppy and could have been almost overpowered by his opponent, but now he has trained himself to work with even the smallest amount of energy just for survival.

The second sleeping habit was from when he was truly a child, before the grueling missions and training. He was always the last of the siblings to wake up and would have been the last ones to arrive at the table if it wasn’t for his teleportation abilities. After retiring it would take him a while but eventually, he started sleeping like that again. He could finally rest easy with him clinging onto you like a koala and not be woken even by Luther’s heavy footsteps. His habit of waking up precisely at 6am came from his age, (well mental not physical) he woke up exactly at the same time the sun rose.

Although he was an insomniac due to going for days without sleep to try and stop the apocalypse, now that he was retired, he had no reason to skip sleep, he had all the time in the world. He also surprisingly isn’t a night person despite his insomnia, he would much rather sleep at 9pm after reading for a bit and wake up bright and early (which is very old man of him). If you were a morning person, he’d spend a few minutes in bed with you, basking at the new sunshine before shuffling the both of you to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. If you weren’t a morning person, he would wake up first and stare at your sleeping self with so much love and adoration that Five would rather die than be caught in the act. You would wake up to an empty bed in slight panic but the smell of pancakes and the clanking of pans in the kitchen would quell your anxieties as you go to the kitchen to greet a cooking Five good morning. :)

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iambicpentameterhamster · 1 month

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Every umbrella academy character ranked

Prior to Season 4 coming this year, thought I'd share my character rank with you for the first 3 seasons all together. (Spoilers ahead)

#33- Marcus, Jayme, Alphonso and Fei

Painfully insignificant and underdeveloped. Their only character traits being "spoiled and a bit evil" made them EXTREMELY captivating villians...

#32- Christopher

Only higher because I find the idea of someone carrying around a cube on a stick onset really funny.

#31- Sparrow Ben

Hard to watch honestly, especially in comparison to his lovely counterpart Umbrella Ben.

In general, the Sparrows were terrible and pointless characters, and clearly the writers knew this because most were killed off pretty quickly. All except for Sparrow Ben, which just meant we had to suffer watching him for even longer.

#30- Viktor

This is a controversial choice. He is tolerable in season 1, but then just becomes a moochy emo sod who is boring to watch. I don't know if it's the acting, script or both, but he’s just such a meek and flavourless character who is PARTICULARLY bad in season 3 when he jeopardises his whole family and is repeatedly selfish and has a victim complex.

#29- Luther

He caused the apocalypse in season one and you can't convince me otherwise. Got some alamaba shit going on with Allison...

There are so many reasons I hate Luther. He's a self-centred man child who couldn't care less about his siblings and their feelings, showing zero empathy to Klaus or Vanya, for example. He only shows respect and kindness when he is attracted to the person (As shown when seasons 1 and 2 he is only nice to Allison, then completely ignores her when he moves on to Sloane) or when they pose as an authority figure to him. All he does is whine and feel sorry for himself.

What's that? You lived in the apocalypse all alone for 40 years? You are addicted to drugs and lost the love of your life in a war? You have a power you can't control and a lifetime of rejection? WELL LUTHER WENT TO THE MOON

#28- Carl Cooper

Hated him as a character but he was a menacing villian which I can respect

#27- Harlan

Couldn't care less about him, only there for plot convenience and Victor's arc pretty much

#26- Sloane

An improvement from Luther's literal sibling. Further evidence that Luther will simply fall for any woman who gives a flying fuck about the moon.

Personality: attracted to Luther

#25- Pogo

Basil exposition of the first series

#24- Detective Patch

Barely remember her

#23- The Swedes

They were kind of goofy as villians but there was some good acting and they posed a real threat. Cute moments with the cats. In general, alright, but they could have easily been replaced plot wise with something more interesting.

#22- Cha Cha

Lack of character development for me. I think she deserved to be fleshed out more, I don't think it's fair that only her partner got to be a three-dimensional being. What are her motivations? Who is she underneath it all?

But overall i liked the acting and she was a good villian.

#21- That hotel worker from season 3

He's barely a character but I liked his sass so he's on the list.

#20- Reggie (Reginald Hargreeves)

He is supposed to be the main antagonist/villian of the show, yet The Handler stole his spotlight. He's a bit too stereotypically evil and asshole-ish for me, basically twiddling his moustache and stroking a cat in a dark corner the entire show. The delivery is too blunt and that doesn't help to build the tension and mystery surrounding him as much, but if he were more complicated and cryptic in his personality it would be more effective.

This is very nit picky and overall Reggie is fine. He has some hilarious moments with Klaus in season 3 and I am genuinely intrigued about the unanswered questions surrounding him.

#19- Elliott

He wasn't a particularly important or central character but I enjoyed it when he was on screen and he played his role convincingly. He was a good comic relief in some scenes, and when he died (spoiler alert) the reactions from other characters were realistic and quite impactful. I felt for him throughout, which is impressive for less significant characters and he had a lot of depth relative to the size of his role.

#18- Destiny's children

Not a singular character, but I LOVED Destiny's children. It fit Klaus's character perfectly to have a cult and led to some of the funnies moments in the series.

#17- Dave

From the very limited moments we see with this character, a lot of personality and emotion was communicated, and I feel like we got a big sense of the character. That is down to the brilliant acting from both of Dave's actors and from Robert Sheehan that really sold this character with so little screen time.

Anyway please come back to life Dave! Death doesn't look good on you!

#16- Agnes (Donut woman)

Very sweet and I wish her all the best in life.

#15- Sissy

BRILLIANTLY acted and impactful. Stole every scene between her and Vanya.

Also, she looks EXACTLY like Sheldon's mum in young sheldon...

#14- Herb and Dot

I want to put them both in my pocket and protect them from harm.

#13- Kenny's mum

Again, barely present but I love her. She's a queen. I would go to a rave with Kenny's Mum.

#12- Stan

I love Stan, and he's a big part of Diego and Lila's character development and motivations. I hope they adopt Stan and live happily ever after.

But yeah, great one-liners from Stan.

#11- Grace

Very well acted and haunting.

Top 10 *drumroll please*

#10- Harold Jenkins (Lenoard Peabody)

Again, quite a controversial placement, but I stand by my decision. The acting and delivery of Harold Jenkins as a villain is possibly the best in the whole show. I was totally convinced Lenoard was a nice guy and I was rooting for him and Vanya, until he started dropping hints and slowly revealing his true self and losing the facade and its... it's chefs kiss. So realistic. The actor deserves an award and a standing ovation.

The writers also deserve a pat on the back for this one because he has a convincing motivation and backstory, and the dialogue is DELICIOUS when it comes to Lenoard. He is a truly menacing villain without being overtly scary and powerful and dangerous.

#9- Ray

Charismatic, gentlemanly, empathetic, loving, trusting, supportive... Ray is THE IDEAL MAN. I'm a little bit in love with Ray so I don't blame Allison.

HUGE step up from Luther, for sure.

#8- Umbrella Ben

I would have liked to see more of his character, but I liked what I did see. He loves his siblings and shows it. He is selfless and sacrifices his own existence for Vanya, he is blunt with Klaus because he cares and wants him to improve. Of course, he and Klaus are also a hilarious duo.

#7- Hazel

One of the most touching arcs that offers an insightful message about what life is for, and about Love. Beautifully acted, a very real and lovable character who probably resonates with many in some ways. Hazel is adorable and i miss him in later seasons.

#6- The Handler

I LOVE THE HANDLER MORE THAN WORDS CAN EXPLAIN!!! Funny, playful, entertaining, uexpected and whimsical and yet simultaneously dark and menacing, AMAZING villian that stole EVERY SINGLE SCENE she was in. Kate Walsh was the perfect choice for the role and she played it to perfection.

A bit of trivia about the role, The Handler was originally written for a man, and when Kate Walsh got the role she insisted they didn't change the script (which, let's be honest, they would have.) She put a wonderful spin on it and it's just perfect, I wouldn't change a thing. I would 100% watch a spinoff all about the handler. Season 3 was worse than the previous two thanks to them killing her off (amongst other questionable plot choices)

#5- Allison

Allison was the only character who knew what they were doing, and honestly, if everyone just listened to Allison, there would be no apocalypse. Her storyline losing both Claire and Ray and her powers driving her crazy with power breaks my heart but is well portrayed and impactful.

She's charismatic, clever, strong, and kind. I love Allison and I think most of us do.

#4- Diego

He's stupid but in an endearing way, I find him to be so entertaining and funny, and the actor's face is like an open book. He's not show-stopping but his consistent presence just sets the mood and allows others to act off of him, while he really sells it with his expressions. He's like the rock of the show.

#3- Lila

Lila. Mi amor. Mon amour. Amore mio. Meine Leibe.

#2- Five

For several reasons:

A) He is the daddy here, Luther!!

B) That should be the only reason you need

Seriously, though, I was SUPER impressed with Aidan Gallagher and his incredible screen presence, especially at such a young age. He really embodies the character. Five is the face of the Umbrella Acadamy, and is undoubtedly the most iconic character. 10/10, two thumbs up, absolutely BRILLIANT.

#1- Klaus

No justification necessary.

#the umbrella academy #klaus hargreeves #diego hargreeves #five hargreeves #reginald hargreeves #allison hargreeves #lila pitts #ben hargreeves #luther hargreeves #vanya hargreeves #viktor hargreeves #raymond chestnut #the handler #the sparrow academy

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golden-redhead · 2 years

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Incoherent, messy and out of order first spoilery thoughts on TUA season 3, let’s go!

Viktor’s transition was incorporated rather nicely in the show and it led to some really wholesome sibling moments that I will cherish forever

the actor playing Reggie is a delight and while the character is extremely unlikable, I love seeing him on screen. it really is a testament to how good the TUA casting is

I expected to dislike the whole Stan thing, but I actually found myself enjoying it? I think the humor and delivery of some of the lines was amazing and made it work even if I am not a huge fan of what became of Diego in the last 2 seasons

Lila and Five’s dynamic absolutely SLAYS! idk, they are such a pleasure to watch, all this easy banter and everything, I just find their whole chemistry very satisfying and it shows both in the show and in the interviews that the actors truly get these characters, what they’ve been through and how it affected this relationship in particular. honestly, some amazing performances from both of them

overall, I feel like the performances in general were what made this season actually good to watch. I have a lot of complaints about some of the lines, subplots and plot points in general, but I can’t deny that I simply love these characters and the way they are portrayed by the actors and even though I can’t say I’m happy with everything that happened, it was still a lot of fun to watch. again, casting of this show is absolutely unmatched!

I really wish some inconsistencies in Allison’s reasoning were fixed and I still don’t know how to feel about THAT scene with Luther... I mostly can’t believe that it not only made it into the season, but - more importantly - that it isn’t addressed later on... at all. it’s one thing to portray dysfunctional and grieving characters doing shitty and questionable things, it’s another to frame it... well, the way they did it this season.

that said, I enjoyed Allison’s arc a lot and Emmy Raver-Lampman is an amazing actress who was horribly underutilized until now, so I’m happy to see her have more defined role this season.

there’s something really interesting about the theme of losing one’s family in a show that’s so focused on family in general. I mean, usually when you grow up you begin making your own family unit with your spouse and children, so it’s interesting to see how Allison is torn between her obligation to her siblings, the family she didn’t choose, and the family she created as an adult. I know that we are more inclined to root for her relationship with other Umbrellas because they are the focus of the show, but it does make absolute sense for her to try to bring back the family she made for herself

I liked Klaus so much more this season and his scenes, especially those with other siblings, were really great! him bonding with Five was everything I wanted and didn’t even know. and it’s nice to finally tap into his issues with his powers instead of having him escape from them

Five being the Commission founder... I said in another post that I totally saw him being tied to the Commission’s existence in a more meaningful way coming because of how his powers operate in the same way the briefcases do, but I did not see THAT coming

on one hand, Sloane and Luther are a great example of insta love and everything wrong with it. on the other, though, it gave us some fun subplots and dynamics and if there’s one character that deserved to find peace and normalcy - it was Luther. I honestly need more time to form an opinion on it.

RIP Marcus and his potential, I guess...

Fei deserved better

Allison and Viktor’s fight in episode 7 was amazing, the tension was really palatable and dang, THIS is how you write characters fighting! the actual VENOM in Allison’s voice, just... such a great scene, I was so impressed with the acting

the amount of sudden deaths and betrayals was absolutely INSANE, the reviewers did not lie about that, holy shit

that moment when Five steps on his star, in the middle of the circle, connecting all of them? I don’t know what is it about that scene, but holy fuck, CHILLS

I might add more later once I collect my thoughts more, for now I’m a rambling, absolutely incoherent mess of emotions.

#the umbrella academy #tua spoilers #tua s3 spoilers #tua season three #spoilers #umbrella academy #five hargreeves #viktor hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #diego hargreeves #luther hargreeves #lila pitts #reginald hargreeves #spoiler

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filmmarvel · 2 years

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Umbrella Academy Season 4 Thoughts and Theories

I agree with @eddie-dxaz‘s theory that Allison is dead. To summarize, Allison is in the afterlife, which has taken on her form of heaven. Once the siblings realize that, Klaus will attempt to resurrect her (the question is, will she even want to be resurrected?- I kind of doubt it).

Since Klaus hasn’t fully reached this ability, he will spend the season focused on that.

I’ve already seen people theorizing that next season will be his ‘crazy’ season (after Luther, Diego, and Allison). I think his obsession will be attempting to master the power of resurrection- specifically in order to resurrect Dave as well as Allison. People have already pointed out that each season, a character’s obsession stems from trauma and attempting (sometimes) to work through it. Dave & Klaus’ time in Vietnam is a pretttyy big source of trauma (not to mention his most recent source of trauma through betrayal thanks to Reggie). We’ve already seen that his tattoos have disappeared- they were special to him so that could potentially cause a crisis for sure.

The Ben on the train is Umbrella Ben- the Umbrellas AND the Sparrows should exist in the reset timeline. Not to mention, what’s the point in including that as an end credit scene if it is in fact Sparrow Ben? It didn’t serve much purpose beyond showing him, and we already know that Sparrow Ben is alive and with them in that timeline.

Speaking of the Sparrows, since they (presumably) existed in the original timeline (just not the Sparrow Academy) they’ll also exist in this timeline. They just won’t recognize any of the Umbrella Academy members. I imagine this will cause a bit of a crisis for Ben, as we’ve already seen how he bases so much of his self identity on the Sparrow Academy.

Luther of course, will be searching for Sloane- we have no idea what her life is like in this timeline, so that plotline could take several forms.

Diego and Lila, of course, will be starting a family.

And (obviously) the main focus of the season will be on taking down Hargreeves. I think next season has the potential to be a great one, especially now that they’re moving away from the apocalypses plotline. That repetition hasn’t bothered me too much yet just because of how creative the show is in other ways, but regardless I’m glad they’re moving on to a strong villainous presence. This will be an incredibly difficult and personal fight for all of the Hargreeves, and Colm Feore is an fantastic villain, so personally, I can’t wait for season 4.

#the umbrella academy #umbrella academy #tua #umbrella academy 3 #umbrella academy spoilers #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #five hargreeves #ben hargreeves #viktor hargreeves #reginald hargreeves #klaus and dave #raymond chestnut #sparrow academy #the sparrow academy #sloane hargreeves

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bluesyjean · 9 months

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It's the last one, so I might as well do this. Very big thanks to @c0ffeeb1ack for organizing a rewatch. I really enjoyed all the commentary and going through the series one episode at a time rather than binging the whole thing, and it made me appreciate it so much more. (Especially s3, which got infinitely more fun on a rewatch without my Big Nerves about what was going to happen. s1 is forever my girl, but there are some genuinely great moments in s3.)

Extra hot takes for Oblivion:

SO HAPPY LUTHER AND KLAUS GOT TO DO SCENES TOGETHER. The entire Void sequence was quality. Knowing these two are such good buddies irl it's about damn time they got to hang out more on screen. They must have had so much fun doing this.

It took me a long long time, but Sparrow!Ben grows on you. He's hilariously trying SO HARD to be an asshole every time he opens his mouth you just have to laugh. So extra.

I forever wish Lila wasn't pregnant. I'm sorry, it just doesn't do a great service to her or Diego because now everything has to be about this. My relief when Stan wasn't theirs was so short lived.

Five whispering conspiracy theories with Viktor is so good. I missed them being besties, so happy he's still the one Five trusts. (In a "I'll kill you myself" if you fuck up again kind of way, but that's just Five for you.) We love paranoia.

Also was so happy to have Five and Allison actually talk to each other, even if it's just to fight. I've waited so long.

This episode had a lot of interesting character combos. Sloane and Ben with Five, Luther and Klaus, I could have had more of this.

Didn't notice before that the sigil thing is on the back of the guardians. Which means...? Nothing, but I did notice.

Love that they always turn blue when life is being sucked out of them. Just a bunch of little blue aliens.

The first time I watched this I was convinced that Five would eventually lose that arm again when they fix the universe. I hope not, poor left-handed little guy. He loves to write. :( But that might also mean deaths happen again. Fully prepared for bummers in s4.

I was not as enthralled with the soundtrack of s3 as I was in past seasons, but I will say the closing song is the only one that made its way into rotation on my playlist. Great choice.

Desperate for Abigail to be a horrific villain in s4. Please give me this, it's all I ask.

Anyway I might end up watching the last season this way. (One episode a day.) Great idea! Taking time to enjoy something, what a concept. Thanks all!

#tua #the umbrella academy #tuamre #five hargreeves #allison hargreeves #viktor hargreeves #ben hargreeves #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #lila pitts #klaus hargreeves #tua hot takes #this was fun!#nobody does it like tua #tua s3 #tua s3 spoilers

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fiveloml · 2 years

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sparrow!ben hargreeves x reader. “ is that a yes? “ [ gender neutral reader. ]

─ ✧ season 3 spoilers ! ben is drunk and you ask him out to dance during sloane and luther's wedding.

─ ✧ gosh i love this man ,, way too much actually.

the day of luther and sloanes wedding was quite an interesting one, as their love began, the very world it started in was ending.

you giggled at your friend who was on the dance floor with his wife, happy for him but you still wanted to make a few teasing jabs at the fact he couldn't dance. you weren't related to the hargreeves, but were dragged into their mess after being stuck with them since their original timeline.

“even after all these years, he still moves like he's got two left feet.“ five sighs, sitting next to you as you playfully punched his arm.

“cut him some slack, its not like he's had people to dance with since we were kids“ you chuckled as five shrugged, taking a sip of his drink.

“speaking of dancing.. you planning to ask ben? i mean you've always liked him. especially since that one time when we were younger you purposefully made yourself trip so he'd-“ you quickly put a hand to cover five's mouth and shushed him. “that was your ben. not this one, so shut your mouth you talkative portal boy!“ you hissed, but as you uncovered his mouth he had an annoying smile.

“oh yeah sure.. yet you still treat that ben the very same way you treated ours. why is that?“ five questioned, already knowing the answer. you looked at him with an a pissed off expression before letting out a scoff. “ugh! fine, you win.“ you stood up, but five yelled before you walked off. “dont forget, if you chicken out i'll make fun of you till the world ends!“

you rolled your eyes at his comment before approaching bens table, awkwardly sitting next to him as he looked over to you. “hey.. ben.“ you say. “hi.“ he replies, ben somewhat trusted you, you were kind and tried to reason with the sparrows the first time you landed into their home.

there were no other words exchanged and it was rather awkward, but you didn't want to deal with five ranting into your ear of how much a coward you were if you somehow survived the world ending.

“do you.. want to dance?“ you asked, looking to the side as you felt your face go hot. “just that? your face seems to suggest you want much more.“ ben teased, but you only rolled your eyes at him.

“yes ben, just a that.. also are you drunk?“ you noticed the a scent of alcohol that came as he spoke, ben shrugged his shoulders and had what was his 12th shot of the night. “a little.. though just sober enough to dance.“

“is that a yes?“ and before you could say anything else, ben grabbed you by the wrist and brought you to the dance floor. his hands on your waist and your arms resting on his shoulders.

you didn't expect him to actually accept, so you tried to not melt as you maintained eye contact. mostly trying to make it seem that you're annoyed.

“for someone who asked me in the first place.. you really do seem quite annoyed that you're with me right now.“ ben points out, but you decided to instead look down at your feet and not answer him. mostly focusing on trying not to flatten his foot as you danced with the song.

“you know, you have to look at your partner when you dance.“ ben smirked, using his hand to lift you up by the chin and make you look at him. “you were so confident earlier, so why is it your eyes don't meet mine?“

“behave yourself, ben!“ you scolded him, face warm as he chuckled. “can't when you're so cute.“ and that was your last straw, you wanted to pull away however ben held you tight. “can't back out now sweeheart, you're stuck with me.“

though you pouted, you couldn't hide your smile. it wasn't so bad being with him.

#tua x reader #tua x you #tua x y/n #sparrow ben x reader #sparrow!ben x reader #ben hargreeves x reader #ben x reader #sparrow ben hargreeves x reader

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rebelumbrella46 · 11 months

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THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY - Theory Time!

I came up with a plot line for season 4, and it goes like this...

We know that the girl on the bike is a metaphor for God. So what if she's causing the apocalypse? What if when she says that Klaus can't stay because he doesn't belong, it's because he has the Marigolds inside, and we know that the Marigolds come from Reginald's world, so maybe Heaven as we know it isn't the place where the creatures from other worlds (not humans) can go after dying, and that's why Klaus ends up in the Void instead of Heaven. We never see Klaus meeting Ben on the other side, and when he talks to Reginald in S1, it's the little girl who points him in another direction (probably away from heaven) and the girl isn't really sure if she made Klaus, she says "I made everything so I must have made to you too" maybe she can feel that there is something inhuman about Klaus and that's why she doesn't like him. I mean, all the "I don't like you so I won't let you go to heaven" It seems a bit drastic, when you realize that Klaus isn't that bad of a person, apart from drug addiction and the “troublemaker” part.

So the plot goes like this: it's not really Viktor that causes the apocalypse, it's God, but... because of Reginald.

She knows that someone has come along and created an imbalance in the world she created, therefore, "You're not supposed to be here," she keeps saying. "You can't stay." Or if you don't want to say that it’s God doing, you can say that the apocalypse is happening because of all of them, because of Reginald coming to earth and because of the Umbrellas and Sparrows having the Marigold when they were supposed to be normal children.

If this is the case, then ending the show like it ended in S3, with them without powers, and just living a normal life, no powers, no apocalypse, and just them as a family, going on with their lives, would have been perfect. But since that was the ending of the last season, and it's not (or at least I hope they don't re-use it) going to be the same ending. I think they'll get their powers back.

So if Klaus dies again, which is very possible, and he regains his powers. i think he could come back and that, coupled with Reginald's domination of this world, could trigger another apocalypse (especially if Klaus wants revenge, after last season's betrayal). All of this could result in the siblings getting their powers back and realizing that for the world to be safe, they can't be together.

And Five will have to divide them into timelines.

For example: Sloane and Luther could stay in the present but maybe not on the earth, maybe they’d decide to go to the Moon together. Allison wouldn't care as long as she has Ray and Claire. Diego and Lila could go to the 80s. Viktor could ask to go back to Sissy and Harlan in the 60s.

I don’t know where Ben and Klaus would go, but I would like them to stick together. And Five would definitely go way back in time, since we know that the Commission's quarters are located in 1950.

So that would be the end of the show. The siblings say their goodbyes and then get scattered through time. Only maybe when the timeline intersects, they would check on each other, make sure they're okay, but never get all together again.

And Five grows old, watching them from the Commission Switchboard, watching them live their lives, and is glad to see them happy. He has done a good job. The world is safe. He was a good brother. And maybe in the way, he found a partner, named Dolores (real human)

But even if they all had the life they wanted, they still miss each other. And will forever do.

#The Umbrella Academy #umbrella academy season 2 #umbrella academy s3 #netflix #Allison Hargreeves #five hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #diego hargreeves #ben hargreeves #luther hargreeves #Viktor hargreeves #Reginald Hargreeves #sloane hargreeves #lila pitts #umbrella academy season 4 #Umbrella Academy

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justawaysimp · 2 years

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Just finished Umbrella Academy Season 3 and here are my thoughts in no particular order

— First off, I am loving the other version of Five we have not seen in the past two seasons: the more “human” Five who laughs along with his siblings, smiles, SHOWERS FOR ONCE, dances, SINGS, wants to travel, NAPS, gets drunk, swears more than usual, and gets weirdly excited over a ball of twine! so cute but don’t ANYONE dare talk to me about him and Delores

— The dance sequences are definitely my favorites in the show!

— Umbrella Ben 🤝 Drunk Sparrow Ben (but he’s too hard on himself)

— As much as I grew to dislike Allison to the extent that I would slightly itch whenever she’s on screen after THAT scene, I am highly applauding Emmy for such an effective performance and her realistic portrayal of what a mother and a hopeless woman in the midst of the apocalypses would do if she was on the same shoes.

— I don’t know what to say about Luther and Sloane. But their marriage is cute.

— I just found out that Ritu Arya’s a drummer? And that’s why Lila’s so good at it?! Well, she definitely deserve a fresh, new start with her baby and Diego, and I did have suspicions that Stanley’s not their kid in my first glimpse of him.

— Diego would definitely be a great father.

— Harlan deserved better. And the dog. And Fei.

— I personally think that Allison being the only one having a happy ending is unfair to the others who have lost so much by jumping from timeline to timeline.

— I also liked how Viktor found himself and he finally feels what he truly feels and most especially, not loved less by his family. Congrats, too, Elliot!

— I actually thought that the Sparrows would last longer that just THAT and the show’s about the two families kicking asses, constant bickering, and arguing and agreeing how and why their own families are better or worse than them but here we are with Reggie becoming another Ikari Gendo all over again but with FOURTEEN Shinjis bound by childhood trauma he himself inflicted upon them just to get sum posey.

Overall, it’s an EXCELLENT SEASON WORTH WATCHING AND REWATCHING and don’t get me started with the casting coz IT’S SO PERFECT!!! Robert Sheehan because IS Klaus and no one could change my mind.

#the umbrella academy #the umbrella academy season 3 #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #five hargreeves #ben hargreeves #viktor hargreeves #lila pitts #sloane hargreeves #fei hargreeves #elliot page #emmy raver lampman #aidan gallagher #robert sheehan #season 4 when

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doyouknowthemuffinmaam · 2 years

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The Umbrella Academy Season 3 Spoilers

…….

Things I liked:

Viktor coming out and the immediate acceptance from literally everyone. Brellies and Sparrows alike.

The Sparrows overall. I enjoyed them and they were great if a little underutilized.

Sir Reginald. He was best used this season. Be it cowed by the Sparrows, all giggles and fun with Klaus, or manipulative bastard he was great.

Luther and Viktor. The party to feel loved! Best man! One and Seven coming together! It’s beautiful.

Luther and Sloane. They were fucking adorable and I don’t care what anyone says.

Fei and Christopher. My favorite Sparrows I think. Def my favorite Sparrow pair.

Ben vs Ben. Sparrow Bens increasing frustration with being compared to he Umbrella counterpart was *chefs kiss*

Harlan. This was tragic. Every bit of it but Harlan with Viktor was especially so. Wonderfully tragic.

Klaus. As always Klaus. His journey this season from his mother to his powers was exceptional.

Fives retirement. Five and Lila. Five and Viktor. Just Five.

Allison and Viktor at the start of the season.

There was a lot of good things this season.

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princesssmars · 1 year

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one last night

a five hargreeves x reader

its the end of the world. might as well make the most of it.

wc: 2.001

contains: fluff, angst, and swearing bc theyre all gonna die. five being a lovable grumpy shit. in my head five is physically the same age as aidan bc look at that mf and tell me hes 13 PLEASE.

a/n: the new season broke me so im writing this and reading fics to cope. i wrote it confusingly but the hand grab dance scene is based on that scene from the end of bridgerton season 2 bc kates eyes...i need to bring a man down with doe eyes like that fr. anyway hope yall enjoy.

well. this is it. the end of the world. the last days of your life. not how you imagined you'd go out, to be honest. you put the chances of dying during a commission assignment at about 98%. frankly a little low.

but you’d always been a little optimistic, so the remaining 2% went to your own personal fantasy. that maybe, one day, you'd retire from the commission. maybe use a briefcase to settle down somewhere of your choosing and live out the rest of your days in peace. and maybe, you would live out those days with your best friend. and, maybe, if you really wanted to push it, he'd turn from best friend to something more.

but that dream doesn't matter anymore, does it? you, along with your partner and his family had made the fuck up of a lifetime and created a kugelblitz - the end all of everything. its almost funny. how you'd given up most of your life to "fixing the timeline" just to end up ruining all of them.

hilarious.

so, here you are. in a shittily-lit hotel room getting dressed for a quickly put-together wedding at the end of the world.

god, how your life has changed.

you hear a knock at the door, saying a silent “come in.” to whoever stands behind it.

a soft smile graces your face when you see five enter the room. he stops a few steps from the doorway as he observes you, likely noticing how you'd dressed up more than usual. "you sure clean up nice, hargreeves." you tease, smiling as he does.

"well, you don't look half bad yourself." he takes in more of your outfit, looking you up and down. you feel your face heat up.

"a genuine compliment from the five hargreeves himself? it truly is the end of the world."

"im a man who tells the truth, you know this better than anyone." he keeps walking until he stands next to you, automatically raising his head so you can fix his tie.

"even when people don't want to hear it." you give him a knowing look as you do his tie for him. he knows how, but likes how you do it better. he likes to pretend you don't know.

"especially then."

when you finish fixing the tie, you smooth it over and run your hands over his vest. you look him in the eyes to see him already looking at you with an emotion in his that you can't quite place.

you want to ask him how he feels. about what happened when you went to the commission and saw everything you'd ever known just gone. about never getting longer than a day to just rest. about your impending doom.

about you.

he opens his mouth to speak but you both startle as a sharp knock sounds from the door.

you look over to see a slightly awkwardly standing viktor, who moves his hands to his pockets after gesturing to the hallway.

"hey, uh.. its time for us all to head down, the ceremony is about to start."

both of your lips purse into awkward smiles as he stands in the doorway for a few more seconds before exiting quietly.

its silent for a few more seconds as the two of you stand there. the moment has passed. yet again reminded of your fate.

he looks at you again with a soft yet slightly sad smile. "well, my dear, are you ready to face our imminent doom while getting stupidly drunk with my family?"

you laugh slightly at his dry delivery and grasp his hand in yours.

"ready as i'll ever be."

the ceremony is sickly sweet, perfect for the match-up that is luther and sloane. the way they look at each other during their vows pulls on your heartstrings. but you have to remind yourself that you're happy for them. there's no point in being jealous or sad now.

after the ceremony, you and your merry band of heroes make it to the dance floor, with you and allison heading straight to the drinks table. you watched her as she downed her glass in a few seconds, feeling bad at the state of the woman who you've come to know as a close friend. but if you were in her position you would have gone off the rails long ago. a voice in the back of your head tells you you have.

the reception is lovely, and the bride and groom very much in love despite the weirdness of it all. and the fact that they choose to prioritize and focus on their love rather than the apocalyptic events happening just outside…it gives you a sense of hope.

when reginald gives his speech it's safe to say everyone in the room is stunned. you've barely gotten to know three variations of the hargreeves patriarch but you know that he's far from a pleasant person. during late nights doing paperwork at the commission you and five would share stories about your respective childhoods, with his being as dark as you expected from the stand-offish man. but it felt nice to know that he trusted you so deeply.

after the initial reception, there's some downtime for everyone to indulge in the surprisingly above-average food from the hotel's bar and restaurant. you get yourself a plate before sitting at a table near the back of the room, silently eating and drinking and observing the family around you.

you're interrupted by lila pulling out and sitting in the chair next to yours, sitting sideways to look you dead on.

“would you please stop with the puppy dog eyes and make a move on that little turd? seeing the two of you dance around each other has made me sick for years.”

your voice sputters as you try to come up with an excuse, having not expected the girl to call you out so brazenly. she raises her eyebrows as she knows she got you stuck and you let out a sigh.

“it wouldn't matter if i did. even if he felt the same we’re all going to die in a day's time. and id rather not spend this last day with him awkwardly.”

“so you're going to die wondering? never knowing if he liked you back? and i thought i was dumber when it came to relationships.”

“that's still debatable.”

“hey!” she lightly punches you in the shoulder, laughing at your slight wince. “you know im right. not to get sappy but… it's much better when they know how much you care.

as she speaks her gaze wanders over to diego and you have to hold yourself back from rolling your eyes at the sight of their barely hidden lovesickness.

you were close to brushing off her comments again when her arm quickly juts out to knock into yours, lifting her chin slightly to the left. you turn your head and none other than five stands beside you, his hands stuffed into his jacket pockets before one comes out to lay flat in front of you.

“would you care for a dance, y/n?”

with his abnormally soft smile (and lila’s not-so-subtle jab to your other arm), you accept his offer and gently place your hand in his so he can lead you to the dance floor. you can’t help but notice how there's a slow song playing and the only other couple on the dance floor are the newlyweds.

he turns from leading you to standing right in front of you, the closeness taking you by surprise. he smiles at you, moving your hands to wrap around his arms as his go around your waist and shoulder.

“a waltz? seriously? you always seemed to hate those at the company dances.” you tease.

“probably because gertrude wallhaven would always try to dance with me.”

“she just had a little crush on you. lots of the women did. you were the five hargreeves, after all.”

five smiles at your words, starting the slow dance that you know by heart. “is that a bit of jealousy i hear?”

you scoff and roll your eyes. five always was a tease when he drank. “you’d like it to be, wouldn't you? ever the conceited one.”

he huffs a short laugh, swinging you around quickly so you do the same. “well, that is one reason.”

“and what may be the other one, if you would be so kind as to inform me.” you smile up at him, the alcohol starting to take an effect on you and cause you to become more open than usual.

“that I'm deeply in love with you and its been driving me crazy-ow!”

your mind is completely blank for a few seconds before you realize that not only have you stopped dancing but you that you also just crushed five’s foot with your own.

“oh my god, five, im so sorry,” you quickly trying to apologize and help your struggling partner. he stands up as straight as he can, slightly bent on his right side as he waves your worries off.

“peter donahue always did say you had a killer stomp on the dance floor. now i can see why he kept going to the infirmary.” five gives you a strained smile, taking your hands in his again.

“just another one of my many talents.”

you both restart your dance, this time with no words shared. five occasionally tries to hold eye contact with you, and you make sure to avoid it every time. you don't know what to make of his confession. if it was heartfelt or a spur-of-the-moment confession that was given since you would all be dead within a day. you knew as soon as you looked into his bright eyes you would crumble.

but five knew that like he knew everything about you. he took your hand and grasped your fingers together before bringing your arms above your heads and bringing them down between you, and you cant help but stare into his eyes as he does the same.

“please tell me you meant it. because if you didn't then i don't know what i’d do.” you plead, grasping his hand to your chest.

“do you remember that mission in bali, where we had to terminate that guy who found a cure for cystic fibrosis? we there for maybe two hours and you kept complaining about the heat.”

“it was a steady 80 degrees and we were wearing commission suits, of course i was miserable.”

“im aware. it was when we finally killed the guy and you took some of his cash to get some better clothes and you somehow managed to convince me to come down with you to the beach. we were sitting in the sand and it was annoying as all hell but you seemed so happy that i couldn't even complain. and i just knew.”

your chest tightens. “knew what?”

“that i loved you. that i still do. and that i’m an idiot for waiting so long to tell you. guess our impending doom and the cheap liquor finally gave me the courage to say something.” he finishes, holding you close as you stand in the middle of the dance floor. you know some of his siblings are bound to be staring because of the close display but you can find it in you to care. all that matters is that you finally have the love of your life in your arms, even if just for a short while.

“not to be pushy but i haven't heard an “i love you” back so im getting pretty worried over here.” five jokes, staring at you with love but worry in his eyes

you laugh at five’s joke, bringing your lips to his cheek to give him a short but sweet kiss. “i love you too, partner.”

“good. now, what do you say we get drunk off our asses and have the best night of our lives with my dysfunctional family?

you smile. “i couldn't ask for anything better.”

#the umbrella academy #tua #tua s3 #five hargreeves #five hargreaves x reader #allison hargreeves #viktor hargreeves #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #lila pitts #klaus hargreeves #tua x reader #fluff #angst

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