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luvfy0dor · 2 months

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“Hands Under My Sweatshirt, Baby Kiss it Better ♡⁠˖” Fyodor Dostoevsky x GN!Reader ੈ✩‧₊˚

Warnings; BSD Spoilers, mentions of death, ch. 112 events, soft!fyodor

Description; Having a nightmare about your partner dying and waking up to him comforting you

A/n; i'm supposed to be doing a saq rn but I COULDNT NOT POST ON NEW CHAPTER DAY AHHHH I WANNA BE FYODORS MEDIEVAL HOUSE SPOUSE SO BAD IN EVERY LIFE TIME

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Everything felt so real- you watched as your lover got into a helicopter with a briefcase containing an antidote, expecting a swift escape from Mersault only to be impaled by an iron rod. You watched as his eyes widened and his slender fingers wrapped around the pole. Blood trickled from both the new piercing in his midsection and between his lips while his breathing became shaky. He glared at another man in your dream who has been rendered faceless while speaking, although everything in the dream was silent so you couldn't make out any particular words or sentences.

The night terror didn't stop at your boyfriend being impaled, as a matter of fact it made you watch as the helicopter was messily flown directly into a tower and burst into flames with Fyodor still inside. You tried to hurry towards the aircraft, but it exploded before you could reach it. The blast didn't effect you, not scorching you or propelling you backwards at all, but letting you stand there and watch as all hope of getting Fyodor out of there shattered like glass. The crackling embers of fire surrounding you gradually became accompanied by a soft whisper-one that was all too familiar and thick with sleep. You were still in shock from the dream when your eyes snapped open, your legs curled inward with Fyodors chest to your back and his hand soothingly rubbing your side. "It's okay, Moya Lyubov, what happened?" He asks you, his eyebrows furrowed and his breath warm against your ear as he presses a chaste kiss to the nape of your neck. "Nightmare. You're...you're okay." You murmur, relief taking over your heart and mind. You rolled over, your body pushing his backwards a bit. "Ofcourse I'm alright. I'm not going anywhere, y/n, I promise. Was the dream about me getting hurt?" He correctly assumes, his tired gaze fixed on your own. "Mmm, worse, dying." You say, your heart finally returning to a steady pace.

"Ah, that makes more sense. You were very restless, you know." He tells you. "It's easy to tell when you have nightmares, you're like a dog. You make some distressed noises and kick your legs." He says with a grin. You sigh and close your eyes, pressing your head to his chest. "It's better than being stiff as a board though, 'cause that means you'll pick up on it and be all sweet and affectionate." You say. Your arms wrap around his torso like they would with a stuffed toy. "I'd say I'm rather affectionate regardless. You're just needy." He looks down at you and pushes your head out from his chest, kissing your forehead while his other hand slides up the back of your sweater and rests on the small of your back. You hum and twist the fabric of his tee-shirt between your pointer and thumb. "M'not needy." You roll your eyes and look up at him through your eyelashes. "If you insist." He says, closing his eyes and readying himself to delve back into a dreamless sleep. "Mhm..g'night, Fedya, I love you." You say, pressing a quick kiss to his lips that gets his eyes to open right back up. He kisses you back and smiles faintly. "Good night, Y/n, I love you too, sleep well." His arm drapes over your side with the blanket strewn messily over the both of you. Now you could sleep a little more peacefully with the reassurance of your lovers presence in your arms, and more importantly, his safety.

A/n; i speedran this tbh, so I'm sorry if it's not great. Also, would if I made like,,, a taglist would any of y'all wanna be on it because I see so many people do it and it looks cool but I've been too nervous to like say anything or ask bc I don't want people to be like "ew no wtf" THATS LITERALLY NOT GONNA HAPPEN BUT LIKE IDK I'm scared djsjjfjekekak

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myafterlifeisbetterthenyours · 1 year

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And sorry I just had a lot of ideas but this is last one. Anyone you want with psychologist reader. Basically they go to him as parient on theraphy and share secrets and traumas with him which basically causes to get close with them

With a psychologist reader

Angel Dust

Angel was having a bad week. Oh fuck it, he was having a bad fucking year. But he couldnt say that shit else he get a nice new shiner from dear Daddy Val.

He kept having breakdowns. Freaking out or having panic attacks when he needed to keep his shit together.

It got so bad, he actually couldn't preform, and no amount of beatings or drugs were helping anymore.

So, wanting to protect his investment, Valentino would bring him to you. You being a well known psychotherapist, helping numerous celebrities better themselves, completely turning themselves around after seeing you.

At least for a while.

So, he dumped Angel at your door, the Overlord trying to get you to essentially brainwash him to further obey him, planning to use you to keep him under control.

Of course, you shut that shit down immediately.

You told him bluntly you'd do what's necessary to help your patient, and that was Angel.

Val didn't say much, telling you simply he could find someone else, to which you told him good luck, knowing full well itd be impossible to find a therapist of your calibre who wouldnt milk him for every penny they could if thry could do their job at all, effectively calling his bluff.

You said all this in front of the Spider, the man feeling... well, it felt nice to have someone taking him seriously. Not like Val that treated him like a train dog.

Now, your first few sessions were just tredding ground, getting to know the Spider and gaining some familiarity with him. You may have stood up to Val but you'd had enough clients to know he wouldn't just open up.

So, the first few appointments you just spoke, spending time with him, asking genuine questions about him.

Not his Angel Dust persona.

Him.

Youd ask about his likes and dislikes.

You know, favourite music, the food he likes, his thoughts on the current events in Hell.

And while it would certainly take time, slowly chipping away at his mask, he'd begin opening up to you.

Of course, Valentino, the massive Cock-Head! Kept putting you back, the man being his usual abusive self. And after each of these incidents, the spider would pull in on himself, making your job even more difficult.

So, you confronted the man, telling him as much, as every smack he gave the arachnid put you back weeks! And despite his domineering personality, he'd back down, agreeing to stop the abuse.

'For now.' The moth pimp added, raising your blood pressure.

Youd make progress on the man's issues, slowly directing and fixing the many traumas and problems the man endured, the Spider visible getting better, cutting back on most of the shit he took in.

At least around you.

It'd be during one of your sessions, you having the Spider just ramble, saying whatever came to mind, letting him get anything he'd like off his chest.

And as he rambled he'd end up on a tangent on how much he hated working for Valentino and how miserable he was working for him.

It was your first major breakthrough, and well, the one you needed to finally get through.

You seized the situation, breaking him down to the bare Demonic soul, the man confessing every insecurity, spilling his heart out to you.

But then came the issue. Because put simply, Valentino was the Issue. But Angel couldn't just leave Val, that's not how the game worked.

So, you did the only thing you could.

Call in a favour.

Now, you'd helped a Looooooot of people.

Powerful people.

The Noble demon kinda powerful people.

So getting someone to help... remove Valentino from the equation wasn't that difficult.

Once he was free of that man's influence Angel really shined through.

He became more confident. More self assured.

He reduced his alcohol and narcotic consumption to a tenth of when he was with Val.

Honestly he was a whole new Angel, and you were happy to see it.

But, well, this is Angel. And even without the pressure or need to hyper sexualise himself, he'd still flirt with you.

And it'd actually be the day you finally cleared him, believing him to finally be well enough to be discharged from your service, that the spider would ask you out.

And since he was no longer your client, you said yes, the two of you going out to a quant little restaurant together.

It was a... charmingly simple night.

Neither of you said much. The usually chatty spider calm and docile as you ate, the both of you feeling everything that needed to be said... had been said.

Youd go home that night. The spiders hand in your own, as you went back to your place.

Nothing would happen between you that nigh. You were still seeing how a relationshipwould go, trying the waters as it were, so you didnt want to force anything.

Angel for his part, and for the first time, well... ever, felt safe. Understood.

And well, cared about.

The spider genuinely happy to be with you.

Stolas

Youd always been fascinated my how the mind works.

Specifically, how it handled trauma.

It fascinated you how the mind bent and melted, handling or rejecting trauma.

And if there was any group in Hell with issue, it was the Nobility.

Now, it took you a while to find a noble that was willing to pay you to help them, most nobility just expecting things presented to them on a silver platter.

But once you did get your foot in the door, helping a man with some deep seeded inferiority issues. Helping him become the egomaniac he was supposed to be.

And when it got out you could help them with their many, many, MANY issues, and do so descreetly. By God, they flocked to you.

A barrage of daddy issues, child abuse, neglect, regulat abuse and trauma the likes you hadn't thought possible.

And you got good, and rich, helping people with their issues. Learning an abundance on how personality was shaped by abuse. Picking up the patterns and soding that was left with different traumas.

Youd gotten yourself set up, each patient a virtual case study.

And it'd be as you sat in your office, looking over a patient's file, when there was a knock at the door.

Popping the files away, you called them in, coming face to face with an owl demon.

We was unexpectedly timid upon entry, walking around the subject as he asked you if you could help someone with... their issues.

That someone was clearly him.

But you could tell he was trying to be discreet, not like he was the first one, so you played along.

And after assuring him you could help him, explaining you provided a safe, descreet and judgement free service tailored for each client, that he'd agree.

The first few sessions were slow, the two of you just making generic, borderline formal chit chat, Stolas venting to you about his day or something that was erking him.

But after a few sessions, you began making progress, treading new ground. He began opening up to you about his issues. And there were quite a few.

A father that didn't give a shit about him past his utility to the Goetia family. An abusive wife he was betrothed to before he was even hatched simply to produce an heir.

And a completely dead marriage.

No.

Dead implies it was alive at some point. And based on what he had to say about it, it sounded like his spouse was beating the corpse of said "marriage".

So yeah, other than a daughter, he didn't really have anything worth living for. Which, ya know... isn't a good thing.

It took a long time really figuring out what ailed his mind.

There were many sessions that ended up with him in tears, you ending up hugging him, comforting him each time as he sobbed into your shirt.

And while you did your best to remain professional, there were more than a few occasions when you'd stare into each other's eyes for just a little too long. Followed by you awkwardly looking away, clearing your throat.

It took many session, time, care and a small fortune in fees, but you ended with the most logical conclusion.

He needed to divorce his bitch of a wife.

Stolas knew it.

You knew it.

But knowing it, and doing it were very different thing.

Of course, normally that'd be his problem.

But, well, you liked Stolas. Youd done the major no-no of running a practicr and and had gotten attached to him. So you called in some favours to ensure it'd go smoothly.

Of course you kept it all behind the scenes, setting things up so Stolas could escape with a minimal amount of drama.

And so, with a little encouraging from you, as a friend, not his therapist. He'd do it.

He'd tell her they were done and he was sick of her.

Of course the fallout was... not that bad. At least compared to our timeline, especially since Stolas had measures prepared before he did it.

He arrived the next day, you asking him how he felt, Stolas telling you he felt... Free.

Things would be difficult, but for the first time, he felt free.

You'd talk some more, monitoring his progress and development, ensuring he didn't fall back on any of his inhealthy coping mechanisms. And once the time had run out, he'd ask if there were anymore sessions.

Youd smile, telling him, well, no.

He'd resolved his problem, and well, he was done. No more sessions really needed.

To which Stolas would ask if that means if he were no longer your patient.

You confirming it, telling him you were no longer doctor and patient.

Hed nod, before leaning over, grabbing you by the collar just to slam his mouth into yours, the man forcefully kissing you.

The kiss lasted several moments before he pulled back, the man stuffing a note into your pocket, telling you.

"I'll be picking you up at 7. Dress sharp."

And then he'd leave.

Leaving you bewildered and, well, slightly aroused. Sat there thinking one thing.

"Well... what am I gonna wear?"

Valentino

Val wasn't weak.

He didn't need help, or to rely on anyone.

He earned everything he had through cunning and brutality, and would be damned if he needed some shitty head doctor to 'fix' his 'condition.'

But every day, he was filled with the killer of empires.

Doubt.

And doubt led to fear.

And fear led to the dark side.

Was he making the right move? Should he have killed that last guy? Was there a better way of doing that?

It was getting on his nerve and he was sick of it!

So, he found the best, most discreet, psychologist money could buy.

And that's how he found himself walking into your office.

He of course was his ever domineering self, trying to tell you how this would work.

To which you'd listen until he was finished, and once you were sure he'd finished his rant, you tell him simply how it would actually be.

Youd work through at his pace, but doing what you'd say and when. In that room Valentino held no power, but you also held no wish to control him.

You were his patient, and so, you would do your job.

You would help him.

Things went slow at first, Valentino still demanding to be in control, and so you'd have to slowly ease him into it.

You were firm, but not confrontational, letting him feel in control, while trying to figure out just why he needed to feel in control.

Though it was pretty clear, he was an overlord. He had to be in control else he'd loose... everything.

But really, he was just running on survival mode 24/7, and simply put, the mind couldn't handle being on edge every second of every day.

It took a long, long time to get that through to him, but really, it was a simple answer.

He'd reverted back into a Darwinian philosophy. And while many can like relatively normal lives with such a philosophy, he'd actually conditioned himself to abide by such rules, to the point his body physically reacted to every change in his environment. The man constantly stressed and unable to sleep, the drugs only able to keep things on the level for so long.

It'd take a long time to get to this conclusion, and an even longer to start unwinding it.

A lot of explaining and reconditioning, slowly unwinding the trauma he had to endured and inflicted on himself, sure enough, over time, he'd start relaxing.

He was still on edge, but he was slowly learning to take breaks, usually somewhere safe where he could be alone.

The man starting to understand, and rework himself into a more level headed existence.

It was strange for the man.

He'd spent hours rambling at you, answering hundreds of stupid questions, working through a shit load of nitty gritty bullshit he'd never think about.

But, sure enough, one day you asked him a question, and well, he answered.

Honestly.

He gave a genuine, true blue answer. And he could answer without spending 30 minutes figuring out if it was a trick, nor did he give some vague answer to hide the truth.

It felt weird, being honest with someone, and, well, it felt good.

He could be real with someone. No lies No tough guy persona. No alpha bullshit.

Just him.

And well, he couldn't deny, having a connection like that was... amazing.

And so, well naturally, he found himself growing affection for you. The first person he could be real with.

He'd initially disguise his feeling as simply working through any other issue he might have had, the man paying you top dollar to spend even more time with you.

But eventually he'd get sick of making up reasons to be around you.

So he was honest.

Again, a rare act on his part.

But he went all out, telling you he wanted you. He wanted the commitment, a genuine relationship, not just him using his partner for his own gain like every other connection he had.

Youd be hesitant, but after an especially genuine moment with him, you'd agree to a date.

A REAL date. With the real him.

And yeah, everything inside him told him to go all out, utilising his usual power and prestige.

But not this night.

That night you just had a simple dinner, followed the both of you sharing a bottle of wine, bonding on the couch.

And no, you didn't fall into his arms like averyone else did.

And,he loved that.

With you he was honest and genuine, and well, he loved that he could be that way, the two of you having a bond he could never have with anybody else in Hell.

And yeah he had to hide that bond from most anybody else, when in private he still got to enjoy it, the man having something to fight for more than just a never ending thurst for power.

Loona

Honestly, she'd first seen you as a gag.

She'd gotten a coupon for a free session in some magazine Blitz had snatched from Stolas.

And after she'd stormed out of the office with said magazine, the girl reading through it, finding your coupon.

So, ripping it out, she figured it was a good way to waste an hour, tormenting some stuffy head quack.

And so, finding your office, she'd strut in, showing the coupon. And since you had nothing better to do, you'd agree to see her.

At first you'd play along with what she was clearly expecting, asking the usual questions.

And yeah, Loona fucked around, acting like a little shit.

But after a while you'd get into some real shit. Asking about her home life, and those directly around her.

She'd whine and complain, giving a biased retelling, events through from her perspective.

But you could see through it, asking her harder and harder questions, the girl eventually snapping at you.

Only for you to snap back.

You told her her feelings were real and valid, but she needed to accept that she wasn't always the victim and sometimes problems were her own fault.

Loona, as whenever she was challenged with something she didn't like and couldn't kick the shit out of.

She bolted.

Despite dropping you, she couldn't get over the damn harsh truth bombs you'd dropped on her.

So, convincing Blitz to get more of the magazines, she'd cut out the coupons, taking them to you to talk.

She'd confront you, and while initially hostile, the two of you would actually have some meaningful dialogue, Loona having to face some harsh truths. But you also helped her face some problems with others, particularly her relationship with her father.

She'd keep scaving magazines off of Blitz, the two of you chatting almost every day, you providing some much needed outlet for many, many confusing emotions for the teen.

And it'd be after bumping into each other at a coffee shop that you'd actually chat.

Not just dig up loonas many issue, but just talking, like two normal people.

She was a surprisingly chill young lady when not having to think about her many flaws and problems. But you were just happy to chat, it being rare you got to speak with someone outside the office. And we'll, Loona certainly lived an interesting life.

The girl would use a dozen more coupons, spending most days in your office, you often scheduling appointments in accordance, each session steadily getting through her swamp off issues.

But you'd also meet up at that coffee shop, the two of you bonding outside the sessions, chatting away like regular people.

And honestly, the two of you getting increasingly close, and look, you were a professional, but after a particularly fiery session, the two of you going at each other, that you'd, well, youd kiss.

The strange development between the two of you seemingly finally coming to ahead.

And it'd be a Hell of a kiss, the two of you becoming ravenous, things quickly getting out of hand. And undressed.

After that things would be... awkward. Very awkward.

Naturally.

But, after some discussion you'd decide to keep your sessions and whatever was happening between you aside, Loona admittedly feeling like the sessions were working.

And now that you were technically seeing each other on the side, she'd finally have someone she could build a healthy relationship with.

Of course you had to be careful she didn't become too emotionally relient on you, not wanting her to develope unhealthy reliance on you, while also being a caring S/O for the girl, using your expertise to help develop healthier outlets for her anger and frustration.

The two of you would take things slow and steady, you and Loona developing a meaningful relationship, one the both of you would adore, coming to truly love each other.

Though you'd gotten the Silent treatment more then once when you brought up an issue she had during an argument.

Hey everybody.

I haven't forgotten about you I swear, just been doing my own life, trying to get my house together. But I remember and still love you guys.

I'll try and post more than I have, but no promises.

Love y'all!

#submission #helluva boss #headcanon #x reader #helluva boss headcanon #hazbin hotel #helluva boss x reader #hazbin hotel headcanon #hazbin hotel x reader #stolas x reader #loona x reader #helluva boss stolas #helluva boss loona #hazbin hotel valentino #valentino x reader #hazbin hotel angel dust #angel dust x reader

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prettyboykatsuki · 1 year

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OMG PLEASE ELABORATE IF YOU WANT NO PRESSURE THIS IS A CONCEPT (big bro deku)

★ cw ; incest (like. hard incest they grew up together and share a mom), unspecified age gap, bad relationships (reader has shitty bf) dark content in general please don't read if it squicks u ! ! !, deku justifies a lot of this to himself jksddjsk, fem!reader

★ wc ; 1.8k (?!??!?!)

★ a/n ; i use the word nii-san in this context which i dont usually do but i couldnt work around it but it's not meant to be sexual !! it's just like what they call each other and it's important to clarify in this instance bc i dont like using honorifics in a specifically sexualized context i just couldnt think of an english replacement

also. not proud of this one. sjkdfjkaskdjhdfsjka. oh boy.

★ synopsis ; to your big brother deku, your unyielding love is a gift from god.

it's just that. everything about dekus character is about responsibility. it's a burden he bears, one that he has to his whole life no matter what. and i think in the instance of being dekus little sister - he's going to take his role, so very seriously. maybe too seriously.

it's . such a specific complex. such a weighted word. especially when you consider that deku was spending a lot of time as a kid being bullied. it couldn't have been easy, a very lonely existence after all. he's so relieved when you get your quirk, and he spends so much of your life shielding you from his reality. even if he comes home with bruises or marks - he pats your head and tells you not to worry.

still, there's something so relieving isn't it? there's something so kind about it. you feel like a gift from god to the lonely and sad izuku. you're so warm to him. clingy. he fixes your plates for you when inko is out working.

you'd bring him the cutest bandaids in the house and check for fever with the brightest little smile he's ever seen. with gap teeth and sticky hands - deku is so relieved to have you. he's loves you so much, you wouldn't believe. it's so natural him to look after you. even where he couldn't defend himself, your honor was always protected.

and that warmth and need to spoil you persists as you get older. you cry when he has to go the dorms and he spends so much time consoling you. you spend a little time apart then, only really seeing him during holidays.

deku grows up by then. you're still the same to him always. he can hardly accept the fact you're getting older though. you still call him nii-san in that sweet voice and fall asleep on his lap. you ask him for money without thinking twice and deku always gives you double it.

it's hard on him to know you don't need him as much as you used to, is all. he kind of misses it. singing you little lullabies and going to take you down to the store to pick something out for your birthday.

everyone always thinks deku is way too nice to you. bakugou thinks that especially.

but how could deku not love you with whole heart? when you were the only one who seemed happy to see him since the beginning?

by the time you're in college, deku is a big pro-hero. you're young and doing something stable - and deku is paying for most of your expenses because he doesn't want you to think about anything other than your dreams. gives you a card of money and tells you not to worry your pretty head about it.

you grew up more independent than he would've thought. you were so clingy but now that you're old enough to drink - you drive yourself everywhere. moved out and even got a part time because you felt guilty for having him pay for everything.

deku often whines about it, arms around your shoulder and head on your chin in protest - but you always say the same thing. i've gotta learn to do stuff on my own, nii-san

deku wishes you didn't though. he's so delighted when you finally come to him for something.

it's a shame. you're in a big fight with your boyfriend (an okay kid, deku thinks. your highschool sweetheart who you moved in with during freshman year of college) and you need a place to stay for a while. of course he wonders why you couldn't stay with mom, to which you reply that you don't want her to probe you about it.

"oh yeah. mom is definitely gonna bother you about it," he says, laughing a little. you sigh.

"i know. let me stay here for a few days. please?"

"of course. you know im not gonna say no to you,"

so you stay. but you're miserable. and you don't want any probing he knows but he came home early and caught you crying in the shower. and no one is allowed to make you cry ever.

so he asks you during dinner, despite himself. and you complain at first - saying you don't want to talk about it. but deku gives you his nicest eyes and says please.

so you give in and tell him what's wrong. admit to the fact you don't think you're boyfriends treating you well.

and then it's a flood, really. you sit with your knees to your chest and explain everything to him slowly. how he changed now that you live together. that he flirts with girls and you think he even kissed one of your friends. you're so heart-broken, so frustrated. and deku is so fucking livid just listening to you talk.

"why wouldn't you tell me? even if you can't tell mom, you can always tell me.'' he says.

and you sniffle.

"you're the number one hero and so busy. you can't even date. i couldnt bother you with my stupid love life."

that's true. he doesn't have time to date, but that's different. you're different.

"you're more important than that."

"see? that too. you spoil me way too much. i wanna do stuff on my own sometimes. i'm not a little kid anymore,"

"you'll always be my beloved baby sister," he says, jokingly. mostly, anyway. you smile despite your tears.

"idiot nii-san,"

and there's a moment of silence where you process it all, before laughing to yourself.

"i feel better now that it's off my chest. i'm gonna break up with him i think but i wanna get my ducks in a row first so,"

"stay as long as you need," he offers. warm. soothing. tender like always. you look like you're gonna cry again so deku comes over to you, scooping your trembling form up in his arms. there's nothing particular about it, nothing strange.

what he said was honest after all. no matter what, you'd always be his lovely little sister. he loves you more than practically anything and he'd give you the world if he asked.

after your sobbing halts, you pull away and laugh a little humorlessly. he hums.

"im not entirely over it but some stuff about him is so stupid, im a little relieved,"

"like what?"

you snort.

"he's an awful kisser. like awful. it's way too rough and i never liked doing it with him," you say, amused.

deku feels his heart thump where he stands. you look up at him.

he knows it's wrong even when the thought passes by him briefly. it's not the first time in his life that he's considered such things. such actions. your his little sister and it's wrong. so, so wrong to think of you in any that would be defiling you.

but there's another, louder part of him. that thinks it's a damn shame that a worthless bastard like that got to do what he couldn't. he would never treat you like that, because he loves you so much. he would be so gentle, and so - when his hand goes to cup your face.

he doesn't know what it is that time, that overwhelms him so much. but he just thinks you should know he loves you.

when deku kisses you, it's like the entire world stops. everything halts. and when you don't pull away, but instead kiss him back - all of what was keeping him restrained snaps in an even half.

when he pulls away, the first reaction is panic. but you don't look at him any different. just blink - so soft, innocent and pretty. so familiar. so trusting.

you call him familiarly, but he shakes his head.

"try saying izuku,"

"that's embarassing,"

"it's not. just once, okay?"

"i...izuku,"

"good. you did great," he says, warm squeeze. you shake your head and pull away. you look just like you used to. dependent in the way he used to adore so much, hand on his forearm.

"that's...is this okay...?"

"if we're both okay with it then it's fine, right? would i ever lie to you?"

and you look to your lap.

"no, you wouldn't. it's fine if it's you"

his heart squeeze. and you still look nervous so deku pets your hair, another familiar gesture.

"do you want me to touch you? make it all go away?"

you look alarmed first, but then the embarrassment settles i. it's cute to see you like that. but you nod, and deku kisses the top of your head. the truth is, he feels a little guilty. you've always been so willing for him because you trust him so much.

but he loves you, so isn't this much okay? to treat you kindly, could it really be some sort of sin. why can't everything include this? the feeling of touching you is so electric. and it's wrong to some. but not to him. he doesn't care and he doesn't want you to care either. nothing matters more than you, and he's never been anything but so good to you.

why is it so bad if a big brother like him loves his little sister so much? you've always been so precious, a warm beam of sun on his beat face. if it's corrupt to everyone, it doesn't matter. if it can leave you happy, isn't that more important.

you're nervous. heart thrumming as he spreads your legs - reaching down the waistband of your shorts. you're looking up at him with big wide eyes, trembling in his grasp.

you're wet, just damp against your panties and deku laughs at you. you're embarassed. deku thinks it's lovely. that you're so lovely and deserving and he can give you so much if it's okay with you.

his fingers rub your little clit so slowly and he feels his chest go tight. you're divine. more sacred to him than anything and fuck, he wants to love you even more than this. to settle you on his cock and make you feel good on it so you can be even more connected. he doesn't care about anything other than you.

"m-more. please, want more,"

a shiver wracks through his whole body as he touches you, lowers his fingers into your pretty whole and fucks you open on his thick hands. you whine so nice for him, call for him so desperately that he aches to give you everything in more. you cum and he keeps going, intends to go for as long as possible. to make a mess of you and take all your stress away.

he's so hung up in the euphoria, he doesn't hear the door click. even with his vigilance the presence of another person goes completely unnoticed - too entranced by you.

he doesn't hear bakugou the door, on the other side of the wall his mouth covered and his cock hard. he can't pay attention to anything but you.

#dark content cw #incest cw #hard incest cw #age gap cw #writing tag #deku smut #please dont eat me alive i simply wanted to explore the context

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kai-and-their-mess · 7 months

Text

Please Don't Go

Astronaut Mafuyu x Angel Mizuki

warnings for: heavy angst, character death, tragedy, ambigous endings cuz wow im bad at conclusions, and probably poor grammar. this is beta read but not edited to fix anything my beta pointed out to me.

intro: transfem Mizuki, transmasc Mafuyu. Fuyu and Yuki mostly used as names for Mafuyu. transmasc Shiho cuz cmon, have you seen? shiho? ever? thats a boy. prompt taken from @probably-not-niigo Link to the original post found here. the last time i wrote for public consumption was years ago so if POV is sloppy or nothing is capitalized or some of the sentence structure is strange: no it isnt 💕

THIS HAS TWO ENDINGS. neither of which are strictly happy, but one is bittersweet cuz i couldnt finish this until i came up with a "happier" ending.

There wasn't a single doubt in his mind that this was dangerous, sadly past trauma meant that Yuki was the only one 'brave' enough to do this. as the crew flew around in their ship, they had gotten a notification that there some damage to the exterior. Fuyu, who isn't at all the engineer, was on his way to see the damage. the actual engineer, some dude named Shiho, refused to fix the issue unless he knew more about what was wrong.

Fuyu understood his hesitation. they were passing by an asteroid storm right now. but they didn't know how bad the damage was, and they couldn't see it on any of the cameras either. the crew had no clue how bad it was and that's why they were sending Yuki out. if it was minor, they would wait until it was safer to fix it, if it was major, Shiho would take the tools he needed and fix it as fast as he could.

But they wouldn't know unless someone went to look. so Fuyu put on his spacesuit, double and triple checked the oxygen tank and once the necessary safety gear was attached, he was ready to head out. "Again, be fast but be safe, we'll be able to communicate through the walkie installed in the suit, if anything goes wrong, we'll pull you in fast as we can. just…. stay safe, be aware of your surroundings" Shiho rambles to Yuki, worry in his voice as Yuki silently nods along.

"I'll be quick, don't worry." Fuyu speaks aloud to reassure Shiho but also for himself. something in his gut just told him he shouldn't go out there, but he didn't really have much of a choice. resolve firmed Yuki steps forward into the airlock. the first door closing behind him as he does. he feels what he can only assume is a wave of anxiety wash over him as he stares at the second door, the vastness of space behind it.

when Fuyu first became an astronaut, it was because of his fascination with the stars, the way that it was so empty yet so full of life, energy. it was, literally, as far away from his mom as he could possibly be. but it was also so fulfilling, so fun. so why then was all that magic and joy missing? why was there anxiety in his gut? where was that usual excitement? Yuki found himself suddenly…unwilling.

he shakes his head. it's just a quick trip to check the hull and then right back inside. not giving himself more room to procrastinate he presses the airlock button and the door in front of him slowly starts to open. one hand firmly on his tether he works his way outside, maneuvering carefully to the area that's damaged. it wasn't super bad outside. the asteroids weren't too close to him, it felt safe this close to the ship but still he made sure to keep an eye out just in case.

meanwhile, out of sight a young angel watches, brows furrowed with concern, stress. she had hoped and done her best to send warnings but still Yuki had left the ship. Mizuki was beside herself. she had been put in charge of Yuki, she considered herself his guardian angel despite her having yet to pass the test to officially become a guardian. she was an observer right now. her job was to just watch, not intervene.

but she had… "borrowed" Yuki's book from his real guardian angel and knowing what she knew, how could she just watch? Yuki was going to die. it said so in the book. the book described every event from Yuki's life right down to when and how he brushed his teeth, there was a few possibilities for each choice he could make. but there was no avoiding this. there was no possibility of Yuki surviving this. once he stepped out his fate was as good as sealed.

but Mizuki couldn't accept that. she tried everything. even going as far as to try and influence his feelings. it didn't stop him, but it did alter the book. she groaned, watching closely as Yuki floated. part of her still hoped it wouldn't happen, but she knew that wasn't the case. helpless, she watched the young man, putting all her hopes into her heart Mizuki found herself passively wishing that she'd birth a miracle, right here, right now as she wandered off. things to do, places to see.

for Yuki, nothing had felt different, he was focused on his task, and almost to the damaged spot too. after a few more moments it comes into view. an asteroid had struck, not a big one, it seemed, but it had exposed some wiring on the side of the ship. Yuki presses a button on his collar and speaks "hey. I'm at the damage site. a small asteroid must have hit us, there's a panel missing, and some wiring exposed." there's a pause before Shiho's voice filters through the walkie.

"Got it. we can fix that once we're out of this asteroid storm. return to us." Yuki nods, though no one's around to see it and starts to follow the tether back. when he's about halfway there the ship shakes violently, bumping into Yuki, who stayed close to the hull, and sending him away from the ship. Yuki closes his eyes when the ship first shakes, gripping onto the tether the whole time. he slowly opens his eyes to see darkness.

the ship seems almost impossibly far. Yuki tugs on his tether and it goes taunt. whatever hit the ship sent him to the limits of his tether, he'd have to be careful. he pushes the button on his collar again "hey, what happened? are you guys okay? is the ship okay?" it takes a few moments for anyone to answer so while he waits Fuyu starts carefully guiding himself back to the other end of the tether.

to his relief the speaker on the walkie talkie sparks to life and a voice is heard "Yuki? good to hear your voice. the ship was hit by an asteroid, it knocked us off course but we're all safe. there's major damage to the hull now though… I'm going to have to try and fix that if we want to make it to our destination safely." Shiho's voice is hard to hear over the alarm in the background, there's others talking in the background. everyone must be worried.

"I'm on my way back" Yuki responds simply. "Stay safe" Shiho's response is short but it feels warm. sighing, Yuki starts on his way again, the ship growing closer as he moves. it feels like quicksand today, almost like space doesn't want to let him go. he does his best to move fast but it's hard to do so when you have no means of propelling yourself forward. Yuki isn't sure how long it takes before he's close to the ship but it feels like an hour.

it's probably been closer to 20 minutes. all of a sudden something out of the corner of his eye makes him freeze. eyes wide, heart stopped. slowly, his hand comes up to his collar and he presses the button "Shiho…. I... I don't think I can get back" it was moving too fast. the asteroid. He knew that if it was this close, there wasn't a thing he could do to avoid it. he hears Shiho respond. kind of. he definitely heard Shiho's voice, but the words were lost on him.

fear gripping his heart Yuki closes his eyes. he's never felt so scared so suddenly. he feels the asteroid more than anything, a perverse feeling of heat and cold consumes Fuyu. if this is what death is like at least its fast. after what feels like a lifetime the feeling leaves him. he slowly opens his eyes and is greeted by the darkness of space. distant stars shine in somewhere far off, but instead of relief at being alive all Yuki can process is dread.

the tether is cut. the tether is cut, and among all those stars, glittering and sparkling in this distance, is his ship. too far to reach, especially at the full mercy of space. not knowing what else to do. he laughs. it's a pain-stricken sound, gasping, sobbing, heart wrenching. all those times he thought 'I want to die' all those times he thought 'I want to disappear' he never could have imagined it would end like this.

he doesn't know how long he cries for, or how much time passed between his last contact. but like a fever dream, Shiho's voice is heard. panic and worry clear in the man's tone. "Yuki, Yuki! respond! fuck, say something!!! shit!" another laugh bubbles up, it's just so. funny. taking a breath, he steadies his breathing as much as he can before radioing in. "I'm… still here" a loud sigh is heard, and Yuki does his best to ground himself.

he'll need to be able to think if he wants to try and make it back. "I'm…sorry Yuki. we can't turn to come get you until I fix the hull. you should have about an hour of oxygen in the tank. I'm already on my way to fix it." Yuki chuckles, against his will. "No… I won't… the tether broke. you guys won't be able to find me." the line goes silent before Shiho responds again. It almost sounds like he's crying. "I'm…. really, really sorry, Yuki." Fuyu nods, it's no one's fault.

"One last request. Shiho... can you say to me; 'Mafuyu, you did a good job here.' and then…. can you disconnect my walkie from our closed circuit..?" It had been years since he so much as thought of his deadname, but he needed this. there's a long sigh from the other end of the line, but Shiho reluctantly complies. "Mafuyu, you did a good job here." there's a small pause as Shiho inhales, having more to say. "Thank you for your bravery, for everything you've done during this voyage. you'll be remembered with the highest honors…. captain and engineer Shiho Hinomori signing off" Fuyu whispers a small barely audible 'thank you' as the line goes dead for the last time.

it may have seemed cold or callused to just disconnect like that, but Shiho was the only other realist on the crew. he wouldn't try and comfort Yuki with false empty promises and reassurances. they both knew the odds of being able to get back the ship was really low, there was no point trying to deny that. but at lease he could have a bit of comfort as he accepts his fate. not having anything else today he 'lays down'.

letting himself just float in the nothingness of space. his face still wet with tears, unable to dry because of the space suit. Yuki finds himself wondering if, somehow, his mom knew something like this would happen. it makes him laugh a little, it's a dry, melancholy sound. his headaches a little. he's not sure if it's from the fit of hysterics or from lack of oxygen.

the stars become too painful after a few moments, their freedom and ability to thrive in this situation feeling almost mocking. he closes his eyes, waiting. for what? he's not sure. but maybe, for once, he'd be able to imagine. just an alternate world where things went right, where he didn't get lost in space. where he found happiness and love and just lived a boring life in a house he owned.

that's when he hears it. a voice as sweet as kittens, singing with power and intensity to rival the gets used to get him into space. the song is soothing, though he has no clue what language it is. it's comforting, warmth blooms slowly in his gut and creeps through his body. taking a deep breath, he opens his eyes. floating there, inches from his face was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on.

the sight of her alone was enough to steal his breath away, mesmerized by her. she had long pink hair that, to him, seemed to trail off into infinity, her body glowed with a soft light. she wore this milky pink colored dress that hugged her torso and ended with a frilly skirt. from her back sprouted a pair of huge wings, seeming to have glitter woven into the white feathers. Yuki didn't dare move, what if she was just a hallucination? what if interacting with her meant doom for him? not wanting to be alone again he stayed still and listened to her sing.

when her song was finished, she opened her eyes to reveal pink, glittering orbs that bore into him with a look of affection? or maybe admiration? "it's such a pleasure to meet you" the girl speaks, startling Fuyu out of his stupor. "My name is Mizuki, I'm... here to keep you company." for a while, Yuki says nothing. he only speaks when the smile starts to slip of Mizukis face, for some reason, he doesn't want her to be sad.

"Am…I going to die out here?" the question surprises even him. Mizuki hesitates for a long while, her voice tinged with sadness as she speaks.

"that's… what's fated, yes. but! I'm an angel!" she states this fact proudly, and for a moment Yuki feels a bit of hope. but. there's no way she's real. it's just a comforting hallucination in his last moments. there's no way angels could possibly be real. but he would humor this hallucination.

"So, you're going to save me?" Mizuki knew deep down that she shouldn't. she couldn't. not without offering up something in exchange. but the price would be so steep. she couldn't waste too much time, though. the longer she took the less time they had. but what could she do to save him? what could she give that would be enough to repay her disobedience?

"I…." her voice is hesitant. she has about less than 30 minutes. "I… yes. I'm here to save you" she smiles, her voice becoming more sure as she speaks- "I'm here to save you, Yuki. don't worry. help will come. until then, I'll sit with you." Mafuyu stares at her, not sure if she was being honest or not.

hell, he wasn't even sure if she was fucking real. this whole thing- it was insane. but hey, it was the end of his world. so, what the hell? letting out a soft sigh he reaches out to grasp at her hand. "Please don't go" he speaks. not sure if she can even hear him through his space suit. regardless, she grabs his hand and holds it tightly in both of hers. he watches as Mizuki closes her eyes again, singing another song. warmth envelopes Yuki once more and he smiles.

(Here is where the ending splits!!! You can stop here if youd prefer for this to be the canon ending. as for the actual endings themselves you can find ending one here and ending two here hope you enjoy!)

#project sekai #project sekai colorful stage #akiyama mizuki #mizuki akiyama #asahina mafuyu #mafuyu asahina #mafumizu #mizumafu #transfem mizuki #transmasc mafuyu #shiho hinomori #transmasc shiho #angst #heavy angst #fan fiction #fanfic #character death #implied character death

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so-so-oboro · 2 years

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its meeee!!! youre so cool I couldnt help myself to ask for another fic!!!!!!

could I get something about oboro comforting reader who has a bad home life/generally isnt feeling so great? maybe he offers for them to stay with him for a while? lots of fluff, please!

(yes this is very self-indulgent)

thanks so much you absolute queen

Stay Here Tonight~Oboro x GN! Reader

Summary: Your home life is not the best at the moment, with your parents in the middle of getting a divorce that isn't going too well. You feel so alone except for the one person you can count on... Your boyfriend.

A/N:YES! YES I SO WANNA DO THIS!! Yass I love this idea!

You let out a sigh as you hear your parents once again yelling downstairs in the kitchen. It's the same old thing; mom yelling at dad to sign the papers while dad keeps refusing.

It's been like this for a couple of weeks after your mother announced she will be getting a divorce. Just out of the blue! You still have no reason from your mom as to why. Marriage just doesn't work for some people. That's the only explanation you could come to.

You plug your headphones into your phone and turn your music all the way up, drowning out the yelling and getting lost in your songs. You lie down on your back and close your eyes, just focusing on your music. You thought that maybe, if you try hard enough, you can open your eyes and find yourself in the perfect setting!

You'd find yourself standing on the warm sunny shore while the soft sound of the ocean waves crash against it, lulling you further in. You could feel the cool water wash over your feet and ankles, only to draw back and wash over your feet once again. You'd feel someone's hand in yours and you'd look over to see your loving boyfriend holding your hand, smiling back at you.

You'd smile back as you giggle, squeezing his hand a little. It would be the perfect world! No problems, no yelling, no broken marriages...

Just the ocean, you, and your boyfriend you so dearly love.

But you open your eyes to find yourself back in your small messy room, in your crappy little home, with your parents shouting at each other. A frown replaces your features as your music stops and you sit up.

This was the life you were stuck with. Whether you like it or not.

"Good morning, Sunshine!" Oboro cheers with a bright smile as he catches up to you on your walk to school, slipping his hand into yours. You crack a smile as you glance over at him. "Morning, Kumo." You reply with his nickname too. Oboro calls you 'Sunshine' because of your quirk having to do with the sun, and you call him 'Kumo' which is short for Shirakumo.

"You seem tired. Did you not get enough sleep last night?" He asks as he notices the bags under your eyes. My parents yelled at each other all night so yeah. You kept to yourself. "It was just one of those nights. I feel fine!" You try reassuring him. You hadn't told him about your parents divorcing yet, too afraid to tell him. You weren't sure why though.

Oboro always comes to you to talk about his problems and you reassure him, and whenever you come to him crying or stressing over work or something else. But for some reason this was something you didn't want to tell him. You didn't want to burden him with something he can't fix! So what's the point of telling him if he can't fix your problem?

"If you say so." He hesitantly says, not fully believing you. But he doesn't wanna push you.

Today was hard for you! You weren't sure why, it just was!

The whole day you felt sluggish, even after eating lunch and gaining some energy. Hero training was torture as well because you didn't feel fast enough or fully there. You felt like a heavy weight was weighing you down, like 10 boulders were stacked onto your back.

You just felt like you couldn't move and you were unsure why! Perhaps it was the guilt of constantly lying to Oboro throughout the whole day, and the more and more you did it, the less Oboro began to believe you.

You were falling apart.

You needed help before these boulders crushed your whole body.

"Where are we going, Kumo?" You ask while tilting your head curiously. He grabbed your hand and was taking you somewhere after school. Honestly anything was better than going home, but you still felt like the boulders were crushing you and bringing you down. He was being so kind to you and you weren't being honest!

"You'll see sunshine!” He happily replies, which felt like another boulder stacked on.

You soon arrive at a familiar place; a park. Not just any park, the park where you and Oboro had your first kiss! It was your guy's favorite spot! "Oh wow! It's our park!" You exclaim happily and he nods, bringing you over to the pretty fountain that spewed it's water.

You happily stared at it and dipped your hand in the water, the peacefulness of this place making you feel lightly better. But the weight came back as you were suddenly turned to face Oboro and he gently held your two hands. You stare up at him and felt your knees buckle at the sight of his worried expression.

Another boulder.

"I don't like to push you on things you don't wanna talk about because I always wanna respect your privacy. But I was watching you today and whatever it is that you're hiding doesn't look healthy for you." He begins to speak softly, placing one of his hands on your cheek. "Please tell me what's wrong, Y/N."

That was the last straw. The crack that broke the camel's back.

The boulders' weight became too much and you fell down while being crushed by the boulders. You break down crying hysterically and he quickly pulls you into a hug, softly stroking your hair as you wrap your arms around him and grip onto his shirt. "Shh, just breathe Sunshine. Just breathe." He whispers as he began to gently sway you two back and forth.

Eventually you managed to control your breathing a bit and calm your tears a bit. You felt better enough to pull away and wipe your sleeve on your eyes. "M-my parents are in the middle of getting a divorce... They constantly yell at each other about it and I never get any sleep anymore because of it.." You explain, spewing out everything you had kept to yourself.

"I didn't wanna tell you because what was the point of telling you about a problem that you can't fix?" You mutter out which broke his heart. He couldn't believe this! You had been dealing with this all alone, too afraid to tell him this because he couldn't fix it. Unfortunately, you were right. There's no way he can fix your parent's marriage. That's fully broken.

But he can help and fix you.

He cups your face and lifts your head to look at him. He had a smile on his face. "I can't help your parents but I can help you. You can stay at my house while this happens." He offers but you just weakly shake your head. "I can't let you do that.. won't I bother you parents anyway?" You ask. "Of course not, they love you!" He replies.

You still weren't sure if you should accept for not but a gentle kiss from Oboro snaps you from your doubts. "Please let me do this for you." He says, staring into your wide (e/c) eyes. ".. okay then.." You accepted and took his soft hand. He smiles and pulls you in for a hug.

"I'll come with you to get your belongings you'll need."

You and Oboro walked down the quiet nighttime street in Oboro's neighborhood. It's been so long since you've heard such silence, you can only remember your parents screaming at each other. Your hands were intertwined with his as you walked down the road, once in a while being illuminated by a street lamp.

The nice summer evening air kept you guys cool and the crickets and cicadas buzz and chirp all around you.

It was just so peaceful.

As you see Oboro's house in the distance you looked down at your feet. "Thank you.. once again.. I don't deserve you.." You mutter out, feeling your hand get squeezed gently.

"Don't mention it. I love you and if anything I don't deserve you. I love you Y/N."

BONUS:

You two totally snuggled together in his bedroom.

#bnha #bnha oboro #mha #mha masterlist #mha oboro #shirakumo oboro #bnha shirakumo #oboro icons #oboro shirakumo x reader #shirakumo fanart #oboro #oboro shirakumo

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kenthenugget · 10 months

Text

Adobe Broke Photoshop in 2023

A bit of a disclaimer: this will contain quite a bit of swearing and a lot of anger so be warned

For the past 3 and half years, I've been using photoshop for pretty much all of my digital drawings. Ever since I discovered you could draw in it back in my high school digital media class back in the 11th grade in 2019, I've pretty much used it for everything from school work to my comic to personal works. Despite its hefty price, its been reliable tool for me, and I've never had any sort of issues with it, up until recently.

Upon joining the tapas community, I was shocked at how much photoshop was disliked by the wider art community. Hell the mod in a server I'm in hates it with a burning passion (and may hate others who use it but idk). Mostly I've noticed that the complaints boil down to photoshop being buggy, unstable and overall unreliable. But in my experience that couldn't be further from the case. And if this were me from 2022 typing this, I would have to agree. But now I can see where they're coming from. In the course of 6 months, photoshop has gone from being a reliable good program to a complete mess. And any good will I had towards it is gone, and I'm surprised I'm still using it. The following is a recollection of my experience with the program beginning at the tail end of 2022 to now. Its going to be hard for me to frame this story in terms of escalation because it starts off really bad but gets slightly better by the end, but not by much.

Crashing:

Its inevitable that any computer program will crash at some point, and Photoshop is no exception. Up until this year, crashes were never really an issue. Sure they were annoying then they happened but they happened so infrequently that it was never a major problem. But that would quickly change. Beginning a few days before 2023, and ending around March and April, Photoshop would crash at the frequency of...every week, usually once per week at best and up to 3 or fucking 5 at worst. And it would all be the exact same. I would be drawing and out of nowhere, the program would freeze. I couldnt minimize it, close, save or do anything. The only way I'd be able to close it was by using task manager to force quit it. This was, as you could expect, annoying and extremely rage inducing but it wasnt just crashing that caused this.

Now thankfully, photoshop has an auto recovery feature so if the program crashes or if your pc looses power, you can recovery what you were working on and everything would be fine! But if photoshop crashed this way, auto recovery wouldnt work properly. It would recovery the file yes, but anything I was working up to the moment of crashing would be fucking gone. I cant tell you how many hours of work I lost because of this. Entire page layouts, sketches, selections, layers, etc gone within in an instant. I would try to levy the damage by changing the auto recovery timer from 10 to 5 minutes but only just.

I tried tolerating this at first but it kept happening more and more and eventually I had enough. My solution was to downgrade to the previous photoshop version as I surmised that the newer version had broken photoshop. This happened in February and up until the end of my spring break in March, I felt a sense of peace that I hadn't felt in a while. Sure, it would still crash but not the level as it did before. But that changed on the 16th and 17th. Photoshop crashed 5 times within those two days, three of them happening on the SAME... FUCKING... DAY!!! I wont lie, I felt defeated in a way I hadnt felt in a long time and out of desperation, I ended up updating to the latest version, praying that that would be the fix.

However this part of the story has a happy ending...sort of. I ended up making a thread about this on the adobe forums and ending up updating the driver for my graphics card and after that, photoshop stopped crashing. And unlike the last time, it didnt increase to that frequency ever again. In fact, I found a way of spotting when a crash would happen and found ways of avoiding it. The freezing would happen on certain files I was working on. And if I closed that file, I could avoid the entire thing freezing and loosing all my work. But regardless, the first 3 months of the year have (as stupid as this sounds) permanently scared me and Im still subconiously scared photoshop will crash constantly again.

The Annoying Ass Bugs:

Though the program had stabilized, my issues with photoshop would persist in the form of bugs which are really really fucking annoying to deal with. The first of those came in the form of it getting stuck on left click. If I had the program open for longer than 24 hours (or if I used the keyboard commands for undo, copy + cut + paste, or other tools that werent the brush and eraser tool), photoshop would get stuck on whatever tool I was using left click for. If it was the zoom tool, it would zoom in and out without me holding my finger down on the left mouse key. Same with the rotation tool and so on. The only way I could stop this was by closing the program and reopening it. Now, this is far better than the program crashing on me every day, but its very inconvenient. And I dont think I need to explain why. Other updates would come but Adobe didnt seem to fix it until an update that came out in early June. However, in doing this, they introduced another bug....

If I rotate the canvas or zoom in on a file Im working on, switch tabs and come back to that file, the camera position is reset. Rotations are reset, Im now zoomed out instead of zoom in, the camera is focused on a different part of the canvas. And unlike the last one, I cant stop it by closing the program. I dont understand how Adobe keeps on doing this. This fix a bug by introducing a new one. How is that even possible? And to make matters worse, they rolled out another update with "stablitiy issues" and according a comment left on a thread I made about this on the adobe forums, they still haven't fixed it. God only knows when they will and when they do, I wouldn't be surprised if Adobe found a way to break photoshop again.

So there you have it! With 6 months Photoshop has gone from a reliable work horse to a program I don't trust using. About half an hour before typing this blog out, Photoshop crashed while I was trying to fill in something, and I have to ask myself, "Why am I still doing this?" Why am I still using a program I hate using? Why am I subjecting myself to this? Why cant I just use the program every artist gushes over like its the second coming of Jesus Christ, Clip Studio Paint? And I dont have an answer. Apart from me wanting to finish my comic without worrying about adjusting to different art programs, I don't know why I'm still using photoshop. Maybe its because I've used it for so long that I have an attachment to it. Like I cant move on and just be done with it. Maybe despite all I said, I dont want photoshop to be this bad. I want it to be a good program. I want say with pride that its reliable program. I want it to be a functional stable thing I can use to draw my characters. I hate what Adobe's done with it.

I don't really know how to end this post. But all I can say is Adobe, you fucked up big time....

#art rant #artists on tumblr #adobe photoshop #photoshop

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unethicalexperiments · 1 year

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idk how to really start this but like. my mental state is just so exhausting like im so tired of it. theres no reason i should be this volatile theres no reason i should react to situations the way i do. just last night i had a weird (not even that bad) interaction with a stranger and it pissed me off so much i tried to kill myself. i wasn't sad or embarrassed i was just so furious over it, because it was a 10 second interaction and i couldn't explain myself to the other person, and i was just so fucking angry i was ready to physically hurt the other person over it well after i walked away. and then once i got home i was so upset that i got that unreasonably angry over a nothing interaction. and its not like i even got angry while i was still with the other person! it wasnt until after i walked away! there were only two thoughts circling in my mind for about 30-60 minutes after (idk im so bad at keeping track of time) that were just "why do i react to things like this" and "i just want it to stop hurting" bc thats the worst of it it just hurts so much. i swear im in physical pain after having breakdowns like that i feel hollow in my chest and obviously i dont have to say anything else about how much it emotionally hurts. i just want it to stop hurting. is that really too much to ask for? to not be in so much pain for just a little while? i guess i still havent come to terms with the fact that im disabled, because i still think of being disabled as someone who uses aids, even though i know invisible disabilities are a thing. i dont see other peoples invisible disabilities as being invalid, just really my own, because i still feel like im high enough functioning that i shouldnt consider myself disabled. i dont use mobility aids yet i dont take pain medication yet so therefore the literal brain damage i have isnt bad enough, im still fine. i kind of got off track but thats also part of it i guess. another thing that really gets me is the fact that i actually do have bpd, i was diagnosed by an actual doctor at 17 and its still a more than valid diagnosis. i feel like im in this constant cycle of "i have to get better because i cant keep living like this" and "i have to get worse so everyone else can see what theyve done to me". like last night i literally had to sit down and reread the dsm chapter on bpd to remind myself this is why youre like this. you do have this diagnosis its real and it is a problem. my 30 minute episodes of actively trying to kill myself to be followed by watching tv or something and laughing as if none of that happened. i still cant fathom not living like this, not having to go through this every fucking day. and then on the other hand i had a great interaction today at my job that made me feel really good about what i do and proving the work that i do is actually helping the community around me. and i felt on top of the world for like an hour, i felt great! and then another thing at work happened where i proved myself/my team to be right about something! which was also great! and i got another half hour of happiness. and then i get home and im reminded of how alone i am, how i really have no one to do or share anything with anymore. which is partially my fault and partially not! im not gonna act like im the most pleasant person to be around or that im easy to deal with, but fuck, man, i try. and it always feels like no one else is trying. i cut my own hair for the first time a few weeks ago; it came out great! and had no one to tell about it.

and now im just staring at a wall over all of it. none of the bad stuff happened none of the good stuff happened. im gonna get violently angry later and im gonna be nearly euphoric later, its just another day. and i want to change i want to change my lifestyle so bad but how can i do that without any help. i spent years of my life begging for other people to help me and got ignored, which resulted in my disability. i tried so hard to fix it on my own but i couldnt! im not a doctor! and now ill never be because i couldnt finish my pre-med classes because of my disability! i feel like im constantly screaming at the top of my lungs and waving red flags shouting please for the love of god someone help me every day and every day nothing changes. they say you cant help someone who doesnt want to be helped, but has anyone actually tried helping people before? youre telling me you cant problem solve? you cant find a different road to a solution, just because we cant take the easiest one? im sorry that its not easy for everyone else to help me, but how does anyone else think i feel?

but whatever. im fine now. i relived every emotion i went through while writing all that but im fine now. now that its all out there its all out there, out of my system. i dont care anymore. because it didnt matter. because it doesnt matter. none of it matters. it happened and its gonna happen again. ill go through these cycles again tomorrow and the next day and the next week and the next month and the next year and so on. it is what it is i guess. but does it really have to be.

#talking to myself #content warning for like. borderline personality disorder. i guess.#this is just a wall of text bc i wont go back to therapy no one feel obligated to open or read this

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altheseahorse · 2 years

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Ok, so reading about Jude and Willem's relationship is the hardest part of the book.

So this whole time, the thing that has felt the best about Jude's life was Willem. It always felt like if Willem was around Jude would eventually talk. He would eventually seek help and he would try and take care of himself better and he would try and love himself.

Willem felt like the one consistent, permanent good thing about Jude's life. He did make me extremely frustrated. (Why didn't he start pressuring Jude to talk to him earlier in life? It was so frustrating when the three of them came and forced JB into a hospital for his self-destructive behaviors but they never thought of doing that for Jude even though Jude was and has been in the same place for years.) But he was there and it felt like he would always be there. No matter how bad it gets. Till the end.

Then they started dating and I was ecstatic. This was sooooo good, this was the best I could ever hope for. I loved that for them. And I was so excited.

Even in the beginning tho, there were signs that bothered me. Like how when Willem was considering the relationship, he only thought of his feelings and then only thought of how he would be good for jude. He never once thought if Jude actually wanted him or was attracted to him. He took it for granted that Jude would accept him and the only reason who wouldn't, would be because he hates himself enough to accept. Not once did he think Jude might simply not like him that way.

But that's ok. It was troubling but I put it on the author herself and not the story of Willems' character. I felt like maybe she didn't mean for him to come out like that but she accidentally did it and actually Willem wasn't that person. So I ignored it and kept reading.

The thing was, things were going so well before it begun. Jude was cutting less. He was going to finally talk. He was getting on meds and he thought he would finally see a therapist. He was doing so well.

When he told Willem about Celeb, i was so hopeful. He did it. He was making progress. I was so proud of it.

And then in Willem's point of view, quote: "…that Jude would perhaps never be comfortable, that if and when they did eventually have sex, it would be because Jude decided he had to or Willem decided he had to force him." And that sickened me. That he would even think that. It felt like this realization was the perfect moment for Willem to end it. It showed that Jude couldn't give Willem what he wanted in a relationship without it being a detriment to himself.

Also in the same scene, how he would look at Jude in his sleep when Jude clearly wasn't ready to show himself yet. I didn't think much of that either, it felt subtle enough to be written off as another one of the author's mistakes in presenting Willem.

And then everything went to shit. The moment they started having sex, everthing went downhill. Jude went downhill and his cutting went downhill and urgh.

And it was soo frustrating to me that Jude would think that keeping Willem was worth it to have sex when it ruined him like that. Not because I felt like Willem would most definitely not leave, that'd he'd be better, he'd be patient, but because he should have just let him. If Willem and Jude couldnt be together because of their diverging sexually, so be it. It wasn't the end of the world. Willem wasnt worth it. Willem was 100% not worth it and it could be the kindest angel in the world and it would not have been worth it.

There are other ppl jude could be with who wanted a relationship that didn't involve sex. And it's frustrating that the book doesn't acknowledge it. (It could be that the characters doesn't know or jude doesn't know, but wtf and why. They are surrounded by lgbtq+ ppl day and night and in their middle ages. Shouldnt they know of asexuality?)

I hate what jude and willem's relationship has become. And I think they should break up. I think this will never be able to be fixed and the healthiest decision is to break up. And it's awful because jude will lose willem.

If willem stays with jude after he learns what having sex is doing with him. Even if willem promises to never have sex or wait again or whatever, i will loose all respect for him.

I really don't know how you can stay with someone who has deceived you in such a cruel manner. What jude did to willem was selfish, because the moment he decided to pretend to be happy to keep him, he was prioritising his feelings over willem. He knew it would crush Willem to know he was hurting jude, the same way as Celeb and all his other torturers. But he did it anyway, and it's not like he didn't know it'd crush willem, he did. That's why he was trying so much to pretend he was happy. He pretended and the more he did, the more toxic and irreparable he made the relationship, the more he scared Willem and the more he ruined smth that didn't have to be ruined.

"He assured Willem that if he missed having sex with women, he should, and that he wouldn’t mind." This bothered me too. It could just have been judes low self esteem and it is, I get it, but why does it say other women and not other people? Why not other men or women? It bothers me cause it implies very weird things about bisexual ppl. (Idk if willem if bi or what, they never say in the book. Or at least they don't yet.)

They should break up. That is the only good ending I see.

Of course I could be wrong. Let's see what the novel does.

I'm in chapter 2 of part V. Please don't spoil.

#a little life

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stayteezdreams · 5 months

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finally back to reply ugh i havent been active on here coz classes are kicking my butt and mental health is absolutely dead and the fear of the future is too much im sorry how are you? how was your thanksgiving if you celebrate? were you able to fix the flooding issue that happened a while ago at your house? how are your dogs? Hows your mum doing? (okay so i couldnt send the ask to your other blog coz it kept saying bad request dunno why)

Hii!~ No worries, I understand the struggle. I'm sure everything will work out, I am rooting for you! <3 <3 If you ever need to rant or talk anything through my dms and ask box (on either blog) are always open! <3

That's weird that you couldn't send an ask to my other blog, wonder what that's about. Hmm.

My Thanksgiving was good! I host/cook everything myself so its always busy, but it turned out good! How was yours? (If you celebrate as well)

My door hasn't been fixed to stop any water flooding, but monsoon season is over so it shouldn't happen again unless we get a winter storm. But I got the bottom of the door blocked off so rain can't come through as much again.

As for my dogs and mom, everyone is doing well! Thank you for asking <3

I hope everything is going well with you otherwise. I know school/classes can be stressful as hell, so make sure to put time aside for yourself to relax!

As for his blog, I knew about Kpop and heard some of it occasionally, but was not super into it until I discovered Stray Kids (through tik tok of all places lol). Once I got really into Stray Kids, I then got into Ateez (another group), and then I just spiraled into the writing side of it lol. So I've only been in the "kpop world" for a little over a year now.

I was reblogging a lot of Kpop stuff on my sideblog (truthbehindthereflection) and I felt like my followers there didn't want to see it that much so I made this blog and decided to start writing!

I don't get into the fandom stuff too much because it can unfortunately be very toxic in some areas. But all of the writers I've come across (or most of them) are super cool! I'm enjoying having this blog a lot!

#ask #message #littlepersonbigworld #<3

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spikeinthepunch · 9 months

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(i know lisa came out a while ago but just noting spoilers ahead- please play this game w/o spoilers!)

the one reason Lisa is painful to play (i know, this will be a easy joke to make but its true) and watch the ending for is that its a tragedy, and also the two different endings dont stop the tragedy

there are two paths you can take. one seen as good and one seen as bad. there are of course various other choices- options to kill or not kill certain plot characters, and you could decide if thats good or not. but whatever you do, no matter how good, its a tragedy ending for brad.

my main conflict and feelings come from the fact that i still couldnt decide if i felt like brad was doing the right thing. even still, i am not sure how i would summarize my thoughts- and he's grey, he's supposed to be. but its not often that i struggle to come to any personal conclusion...

i mean, through most of the game i was confident i was doing a good thing- what happens to buddy regardless of brad is ultimately... bad. there were hints of not great moments between the two at home but even so- his help was needed right? whats going on outside would never compare, the implications were horrible. but you know as the plot continues that is where things start to make you question. it seemed every moment you got closer she got away, and it slowly became apparent that she was actively getting away regardless of how close you were. And there is confusion at first- wondering why, you didnt think brad was a terrible guy, surely she wouldnt want to endure all of this to get away?

the thing i love about the storytelling is that it is vague in the right way. it is a very particular 'show dont tell' that is hard to do right because if youre vague in the wrong way, then you have no clue what is happening. there is so much i see but dont get all the views of, that even i could make assumptions on and start to think "hm.. that sounds bad". and it leaves a bad feeling, a pit in your stomach that maybe what you think it was, really is what it was. and thats what makes the lead up to the end so hard. because even right up to then im kind facing the exact moral dilemma as brad-- there is clearly some kind of disconnect between you and buddy that is hard to grasp, but its real. and by this point maybe youre realizing your various thoughts from those glimpses of the past really were exactly what you thought they were. but brad just can't see why, he tried so hard. and honestly i feel like i was trying with him- even so, i knew something was wrong and i knew deep down that forgiving him for whatever had happened couldn't happen, and buddy's character reflects that well.

so. for the endings to basically be the same no matter what you thought you did was good, hurts a lot but makes perfect sense. you did not change or fix brad's actions and you hardly see any clear pictures where he changed or improved (i think the act of isolating buddy and closing her off alone is a very important thing to remember, even if it seems safer for)- in general, voicing a second chance doesnt even imply some hard change or awareness (in the sense that he was desperately grasping onto buddy as some kind of validation that he could do it right this time).

i love a game with a tragedy ending that not only keeps it that way despite your attempted goodness. but also one that still leaves you conflicted even after the credits roll.

#another short post i turned long!#i am STILL trying to decipher my thoughts on brad #lisa rpg #lisa the painful #lisa

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whoiskwill · 2 years

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i feel guilty, so so guilty. me and dylan were close, we worked together for the whole summer on my first year of working w dad. i mean we basically grew up together despite the huge ass age gap. but i couldn't remember the last time i talked to him before i died, which now that im thinking about it is christmas last year. everyone talked to him the week before BUT me. and when i heard ab what happened, i was calm. calmer than i usually was. was it because i already accepted the fact he would die? probably so. but now i can't fix how much we talk, cause he isn't here anymore. i cant fix it, and i feel so guilty. because now he's gone. he was killed in cold blood. i didn't cry when i found out. i was calm, and all i said was "oh". at that moment i thought if i wasn't strong, or if i couldn't hold everything together, that would be another weight on mom and dads shoulders, so i kept it in. i thought i had accepted the fact he was dead, and that was the reason i hadn't cried. but i actually held in so much that i realized i felt numb. at his funeral was the first time i cried, the first time i actually felt ANYTHING towards the whole situation. i cried, hard. then, i was angry. anger is so much more powerful than grief, and i realize that. cause i can't hide anger like i can grief. i threw things, snapped at my family so many times. and that built onto the guilt. thanksgiving came around, and i think i was still processing everything, but for some reason i expected him to show up. i expected to hear his truck, and him walk inside with his girlfriend and his newborn baby. i waited for him to say "hey karebear! how are you?" that was his nickname for me. karebear. it's sacred now, i guess. but i knew none of that would come true, cause he's gone. i hear mom and dad talk ab having to pay the bills for his house out of their own pockets, and i feel bad. more guilt. i wrote, i sketched, painted, and i still couldnt get rid of the overwhelming guilt i had. i turned tk nicotine(which im going to stop now, seeing that you are right. i should use other forms of therapy/coping) until today. i heard uncle jason had a tumor blocking something in his left braid and if he had another stroke, he wouldn't make it. that's what broke me. whatever wall i built up after the funeral broke, shattered like glass and i broke down. i feel like i didn't get to grieve for long cause no one else was, i felt like i had to move on and in reality, i didnt. i turned to bad habits when i should've talked, i shut down and built a wall cause i didn't want anyone to know i was hurting

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soft-boi-eli · 3 years

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Mcyts helping a trans masc after top surgry (part 2)

Tw:swearing, mentions of surgry, softness.

Karl

This sweet ass man.

You are just laying on your bed, well sitting really, when he came in.

He had a fuck ton of balloons. And a large box.

Karl seemed like a child on christmas.

Placing the balloons down he handed you the surprisingly light box.

He was gently bouncing as he waited for you to open it.

It shocked you how it even fit in the box.

It was a huge frog bed.

You realized with a pillow you would be able to sleep in it perfectly.

"I knew it was uncomfortable sleeping like that so I got something that should make it a bit more comfortable."-karl

You loved it.

Sadly you couldnt use it till those drains were out though.

He was right though that was definitely more comfortable then laying on a bed only.

He didnt think it through though. And got sad when he wasn't able to fully cuddle you.

But he found out that he could lay on your lap and legs.

You both enjoyed it.

Also he might be a bit squeamish when it came to your chest drains but he was helpful with them.

He helped you clean them and your wounds, he was very, very gentle.

He didnt want to hurt you.

"You know it's ok to do it a little harder. It wont hurt."-(y/n)

"But I dont want to hurt you. I know this doesn't hurt."-karl.

It was sweet. But got kinda annoying sometimes when he couldnt get something off. But he never got angry or frustrated. Just kept very gentle.

I imagine that when he was cleaning your new scars, Jimmy came to see if you got his balloons and if you doing good.

You two were in the living room bowl of warm soapy water, in a large plastic bowl, and karl gently wiping off all of the crust around the scars.

You fell asleep before karl finished and karl was finishing up when jimmy came in.

"Karl. They're alseep."-jimmy

"Yeah but this needs to be cleaned. It doesn't hurt them."-karl

Jimmy and karl literally just sat there till you woke up.

You thanked jimmy for the balloons and thanked karl for helping you clean those wounds.

Karl didnt mind though. Cause this sweet heart cares for you and just wants you to feel better and feel comfortable.

Quackity

He loves you and all but dont expect him to help with the surgical sight.

He'll do everything for you except clean your wounds and drain those drains.

He loves to hug you and kept you warm.

He would stream but you were always behing the green screen so no one would see you.

"Alex. Can you get me to book I left in the living room. I feel like shit still."-(y/n)

He was very quick to get it. And I mean he bolted out got it and brought it in the span of a minute. He gave you a light kiss on the forehead, and whispered.

"Anything for you mi amoir."-quackity.

You gave him a smile.

"Simp."-(y/n)

He gasped offended and looked at you.

"Well only for you though."-quackity.

I imagine as a get well gift quackity would get you something to remind you of him when he streams.

Large duck push.

He knew that his streams could last a long time so he decided it was best if you had a snuggle buddy to help you stay in position.

If the duck got dirty he was cleaned nearly immediately by quackity.

If the duck falls off the bed quackity gently yeets it onto the bed where you can reach.

He might of gotten jealous of the duck a few times. But he seemed to get over it when you went to hugging him instead. Sadly it wasnt that easy to but still none the less you gave him hugs too.

Dont neglect you quack boi.

He needs hugs like you do.

Give them to him. These are the only times you get cuddles. Other then that he is making food, getting you comfy, and fixing your pillows and shit like that.

He is now a maid.

Not sexually though. He just cleans the house, get you things you need, and makes food.

He is helpful.

Just not with the cleaning process of your wounds. And that's fine. He keeps you comfy and that's all that matters.

Also if your cold in the middle of hot ass summer and asking for more blankets he would look at you crazy. Like what the fuck?

But you have them lightly fluttered over you.

He wants you comfy. Even if that means you looking like your boiling alive in the middle of july.

If your happy he's happy. That's how it goes

Badboyhalo

Badboyhalo?

More like dadboyhalo.

He is not going to let you do anything.

Your surgical incisions? He's cleaning them.

Your drains? He's got you.

Your getting alot of soup and smoothies. He even joins in on your so called diet so you wont get jealous about what he has.

Rat is all over you. Sensing the pain you were having and cuddling you completely. Your laps is almost always taken by rat.

Badboyhalo doesn't really care if rat gets alot of attention by you. He just wants you to be comfortable.

But sometimes he gets sad that he cant fully lay with you.

But he enjoys just sitting with you and talking through the nights you cant really sleep.

He gets you a stuffed cat, you use it mainly as a pillow and sometimes hug it when bad is streaming.

"It reminded me of you when I saw it."-bad

Your heart melted.

He loved your reactions to the little sweet gesters he did. It brought him joy to know you were able to relax and trust him at this moment and time.

You get a free swearing pass. He knows you hurt really bad at times but he lightly says language when on stream.

You understood though. He had kids watching too.

You were grumpy one day, bad took rat because of a rat cam stream. And all you wanted was to be warmed up by something else then a blanket.

You were sittinging there looking at bad as he streamed.

You could technically get up and grab rat but he my tell you not to.

So you quietly patted your lap.

Rat immediately seemed to notice and run over to you, jumping onto the bed and laying in your lap.

You felt accomplished and tired so you fell asleep.

Rat leaving made the chat confused but bad explained that you were healing from a surgery.

Chat wished you a good recovery and told bad to go and comfort you. Even though you were asleep.

He tried to explain it but the donations kept yelling at him.

So he ended stream and laid next to you and rat.

This was comfortable.

Eret

Eret, they were a whole 'nother story.

This fabulous being is like a maid service in one.

They have two outfits they wore when you were upset.

A maid outfit and a butler outfit.

You just got home, you were in pain, sitting up and swaddled in blankets and Goose was trying to smother you at this point.

Eret was streaming and you were sitting there in the background, blankets, pain, and goose exsiting.

You didnt know eret was talking about you because you were falling asleep. Eret nor you expected what their followers did.

Her door was bombarded with packages addressed to you. Decorated with words about getting well soon, that they were proud of you, even some saying you were their rolemodle.

Eret decided to have a stream of you opening them.

Let's just say alot of them were food, candies, even foreign food and drinks. Someone made you a homemade blanket in the trans colors.

Best part about that blanket, it was heated.

You were using it immediately as you were freezing.

Eret just chuckled and rubbed your shoulder as you opened them.

Needless to say they are proud of you, happy that you were one huge step closer to who you were.

All they wanted was your happiness.

Niki

She's a sweetheart.

Need I say more?

Well I will because fuck you I can.

Constant cuddles, be it only her head in your lap, it is almost always happening.

When you have to take your pain meds she is instantly on it, do you want soup or a smoothie? You cant decide? She'll make it a surprise.

If you dont live with her then you're staying with her while you are recovering. She doesn't want you alone when you are in pain.

You'll be bedridden until she thinks you're okay.

If she deems you as not fit for doing something she's on it. Drop you glasses for reading/drawing/writing/typing. You bet your ass as soon as she heard that clack and you groan she's picked it up and it's on your lap.

Also makes sure you're good with streaming.

If you say your good with it that day it's a calm stream. There is no lore happening when you're healing everyone was fine with that due to the fact that niki would have to sit out and the lore was with her as well so that couldn't happen.

Will came to visit...

Saw you, took pity, and now you're stuck with two people showering you in affection and comfort.

You saw Wilbur as a brother. And wilbur saw you as his younger brother. So he literally felt the pain when he saw you wince.

Niki thought it was cute and comforted both of you.

Anyways she saw something before your surgery and decided that you needed it.

It would make you feel better.

It made you laugh.

You regretted laughing but loved the hoodie.

It fit so well and it was beautiful, you also were thinking about buying it one day because you could.

But niki beat you to it.

Wilbur didnt stop laughing.

I mean who blames him.

You literally just Yeeted your tits. And niki got you something that said yeet right on top of it.

It worked perfectly.

Also when niki's not cuddling you zuko is.

End of story, you're seriously stuck with cuddles no matter what. Be it from an animal or a human.

Wilbur wont cuddle you more of give you head pats.

Niki normally streamed with you there with her unless lore stream.

So when the second day after your surgery, she had streamed, and you weren't there her chat started asking questions. Wondering if you were good, if something happened.

That's when you raised from your dead sleep, zuko falling off your stomach, shirtless, just to go grab some sock as your toes felt like they would fall off.

Chat seemed relived but started questioning the binder and all that.

Niki explained that you got top surgery and that you were healing still.

"He's looking like he wants to die right now. Are you sure he's fully okay?"-dono

"Yeah I'm good. Just stubbed my toe as well."-you.

Niki was quick to rush over and help you back to the bed.

"Just sit down I'll get you your water hun."-niki

She was quick to fill your bottle up and place it next to you on the table next ot the bed.

She's such a big help not matter what honestly.

She loves you and will do anything for you.

I am sorry this took so long. Just had a very unstable mental state. Also sorry if they seem oc. I'm once more not on a good mental state and have been trying to work on this.

So yeah if I dont post in a bit I'm so sorry just stressing alot. Insomnia is kicking me so hard.

My grandma broke her foot, she's all good though.

And I have taken up most things in my house as I live with both my mother and grandmother still.

But yeah I apologize for the break just gonna try to let myself get better. It might take a bit. It might be quite short I dont know. I just need to get more sleep.

Eli is very tired now. Bye.

#karl x reader #niki x reader #eret x reader #quackity x reader #badboyhalo x reader #mcyt x reader #mcyt fluff

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nahoyaglock · 3 years

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WHEN I STOP BREATHING..

pairings! ushijima x reader

summary! sitting on the beach, so close to each other they can hear each other’s heartbeats. They both smile and they watch the world end right in front of them, reminiscing on all they’ve been through together. Why does the end of the world look so beautiful?

genre! angst

word count! didnt bother actually counting so ill estimate maybe 2000+

warnings! end of the world, death, murder mention, slight ooc ushijima idk its the end of the world so pff

a/n! uh idk i wanna hurt people, sorry if this is bad i havent written in a while :p i feel like the beginning was really good, the middle was ass and the end was okay but hoh im happy enough w this. I also cried writing this ngl lmaoo also did not fix any errors so my bad

You knew it was coming, you both did. New reports, articles, it was trending on all social media platforms. It was unavoidable, what could you do but waste away your last few days, watching old shows you watched as a kid, harsh knocks and cries from your doors from friends and family. You couldnt face them, you just wanted to drown out the thought of what was coming the next few hours of the day.

You had woken up and sluggishly dragged yourself from the comfort of your bed to your dirty kitchen, littered with dirty dishes and some uneaten food that youd try to make, but didn't have the stomach to eat. Your phone rang atleast every hour or two, many unanswered calls and long voicemails you couldnt bother to listen to.

There was a knock on your door, and you sighed, not wanting to bother with facing the person at the door. You turned on your heels, about to head to your room when you heard the voice call out to you.

"y/n."

Out of all the people why did it have to be him. You bit your lip and let out shaky breaths. You took another step, freezing at another set of knocks. The last persom you wanted to see was your boyfriend.

"y/n let me in or ill tear this door down." His voice was stern, laced with seriousness and slight concern. You wanted to open it, let him in and crumble into his arms, but it hurt so bad.

"Go away." You spoke, loud enough to be heard through the door, but not loud enough to be a yell.

"y/n."

You hesitantly walked to the door, unlocking the bottom lock, the top lock remaining unlocked, too bothersome for you to have delt with anyways. At the sound of the click of the locks he opened the door with quick motions, while also being careful not to knock you over.

At the sight of his big frame you felt like the world had just stabbed you through the chest 28 times. You backed up with quick steps are your boyfriend reached out to hug you, scared that his touch would break down your facade. You tripped over your own feet, landing hard on your butt.

"Ush.. Ushijima," you started, not knowing exactly what you were trying to say, "Please dont touch me."

His heart sank when he saw you, lifeless and so frail. He guessed you havent been getting much sleep- or maybe too much sleep, and not eating as he took a quick glance towards the food littered kitchen counter.

It wasnt any better for you, seeing your normally cold and calm boyfriend with a worried expression and eye bags that made it obvious he hasnt got much sleep either.

You pull yourself up, your eyes boring through your boyfriends abdomen as you bit your lip, trying to think of what to say, and to also keep yourself from falling apart. "What do you want?"

"y/n. Dont be cold to me." It wasnt a question, but it wasnt a demand. "Sorry," you mumbled, leaving you two in silence for a while.

"Ushi, you should go home," you said, feeling your heart race, every second you spent in his presence, under his gaze, killed you. "You should call Tendou or something."

"Toshi." He said, making your head shoot up, looking him in his eyes, seeing a tear roll down his cheek, his face remaining mostly emotionless, fear slightly present in his eyes. "Please keep calling me Toshi."

You felt a pang in your heart, suddenly the reality of things hitting you. You were the only one going through this, you knew this but never gave it more than a mere thought. He was scared, he didnt know what he was doing, he just knew to find comfort in you, like youve told him to for many years into your relationship.

"Toshi," you breathed, reaching up to wipe the tear from his cheek, "Toshi lets go somewhere."

You never felt the need to go outside, wanting to be isolated, but being here with your boyfriend, you felt like running away, wanting to escape from the dark pit of your home. "Lets go to the beach"

"y/n–"

"Lets go. Lets go, right.. right now Toshi," you felt as if though youve felt shoked by lightning, like you suddenly got hit with some sugar rush.

"We dont have time–"

"We do Toshi, we do, we do," you saw the corner of his lips raise up into a small smile. He hated seeing you like this but he was glad you were more alive than you were minutes before. You knew this, what he was thinking, and you knew his smile had so much sadness behind it, "we have time, lets go, lets go!"

You grabbed his hand and dragged him out of your apartment, not bothering to change from your days out clothing or close the door behind you. It wouldnt matter in another hour anyways.

The ride there was mostly silent, songs playing quietly on the radio. You watched as you passed through the town, the streets were slightly empty, stores looked run down, some stores even tore up and empty.

"Has it been like this since.. since the announcement?" You mumbled, earning a hum for Ushijima.

"Yeah, yeah it has." He knew that you didnt go out, and he was slightly grateful for it. The world went to shit after the announcement, many lootings, murders and other various crimes being commited.

"Im glad your safe Toshi," you spoke into your palm.

"Im glad your safe too."

The ride went on in silence until you got to the beach. You both climbed out of the car, the beautiful blue sea sparkling under the sunny sky. It was funny how such a depressing day could look so so beautiful.

"Hmm, this is the beach we went to with the team our senior year, remember?" He asked and turned to face you. The fear in his eyes was much more evident in the light, along with signs of personal neglict. He hasnt been taking good care of himself either.

You walk around the front of the car to grab his hand, your small hands tracing light circles on his rough palms before linking your hands together, giving him a comforting squeeze. "I remember."

He let out a shaky breath he didnt know he was holding in, and you two found a nice spot on the beach to sit and watch the sky. "Toshi, do you remember the time goshiki got gummy bears stuck in his nose?"

He looked at you, and his face softened, "yeah. Yeah i do." He let out a small chuckle at the thought of his old teammates. "Do you remember when Tendou took my water bottle and filled it with really sour lemonade?" He asked, you could hear his voice unravel into a more comfortable tone, instead of one holding in so much hurt and fear.

"Ha, i actually helped him with that you know?" You spoke up, a small grin on your lips as your boyfriend grabbed your waist, pulling you closer to him. "We'll its okay, because it was 2 years ago."

It had been 2 years. 2 years since you had become shiratorizawas manager, 2 years since you made the number 1 ace fall head over heels for you, 2 years since you had went on your first date with him.

"2 years, its been so long." You laid your head on Ushijimas arm, feeling tired. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and placed a kiss atop your head.

"Thats when we first started dating," you spoke, shoulders shaking with a small laugh, "i would've never imagined to have the nations number 1 ace fall so madly in love with me." You laughed and turned to your boyfriend to continue your teasing, but stopped when you saw him looking back at you.

He couldn't respond with anything more than a mere chuckle, tears now streaming down his cheeks. You bit your lip, scooting closer to him so you were in his lap, wrapping your arms around his large stature.

"Toshi, I love you." It was no more than a whisper and he placed a warm, loving kiss to your temple, rubbing your back softly as he let out a shaky laugh.

"y/n god, you make it so hard not to cry." He whispered in an unstable tone, resting his head atop yours. "I love you too."

This was how it was, clinging to the other and sharing old tales of your days spent with Ushijima and the boys, tales of times tendou had snuck out of the dorms and got caught by washijou, or when goshiki cut his bangs too short, or how Ushijima brought your parents a half eaten watermelon as a gift.

Those last moments spent with laughs and tears, kisses and hugs, warmth and comfort, those were your best memories. Despite the fate to cross you, Ushijima and everyone else in the world, you felt like you could smile for the first time.

You would smile alot, but it felt different this time. You convinced yourself that it was just because you had been withering away for the past days, but you knew it was because you felt free.

You had no worries in the moment with your lover, you didnt need to think about getting up for work the next day, or how you would afford next months rent. You felt like the largest weight had been lifted off of you, and you could really smile for the first time.

There was a slightly rumble if the ground that had made you and Ushijima go silent. You pulled away from your spot in the crook of his neck to look at him, fear still in his eyes.

"I dont wanna die," he chuckled out, "but im not sad." He drew small shapes into your hips with his thumbs, looking onto your laps instead of your face, and you just stared at him.

His usually stoic face was calmed, relaxed, his jaw unclenched and his eyes soft. You hadnt seen so many emotions from your boyfriend so much, it was almost scary. But he looked so gorgeous, he was your world.

"Wakatoshi Ushijima, you know," your placed your hands on both sides of his face, "it doesnt matter what happens to this world, because," you placed a passionate kiss to his lips, the tears finally falling from your eyes, "you, you're my world Toshi."

He let out a noise that was similar to a choke, tears rolling down the apple of his cheeks as he placed his forehead to yours, letting his shoulders shake with hard sobs. Loud crashes, screams and car alarms had let you know it was coming, the end of the world.

The last thing you saw was Ushijima, smiling snd crying, mouthing out one last 'I love you'.

Why does the end of the world look so beautiful?

#writings 📃#ushijima.💭#ushijima x reader #ushijima x y/n #ushijima angst #ushijima imagine #ushijima fanfic #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi fanfic #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu fanfic #haikyuu imagine #hq x reader #hq x you #hq angst #hq fanfic #hq imagines

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souichieatr · 3 years

Text

—wave, nishinoya y.

in which he meets them in the library.

they/them used , 1,558 words

a/n: kinda rushed the end bc ive been writing this for awhile so pls dont be too disappointed im honestly just trying to get comfortable writing but i hope you enjoy, lower case intended

“why are we even here ryu its summer we should be going to the pool” the smaller boy whined, entering the library with his best friend. “noya i just need to drop off this book for my sister calm down” tanaka sighed “im gonna head to the jump section meet me there” nishinoya said waving off his friend after the comment was acknowledged. looking for the section he caught a glimpse of and intriguing character, he couldnt see them because of all the book they were carrying. walking to them whispering “hey you look like you need help, mind if i?” startled the person jumps a little. “yes please, my coworker just stacked them on top of me” letting a small laugh out, laughing a little with them he took some books off of the pile so they could see. looking at them his breathing hitched, beautiful is all he could think. after a second of him starting the person asked if he was okay, nodding his head smiling “where we headed with these?” lifting his arm. “to the front, these are donations” they said took a step looking back for the male to follow them. he started to make conversation with questions like ‘whyd your coworker leave?’ ‘do you work here?’ ‘what's your name?’ the walk wasnt that long so he couldn't get to know them that much. “i cant believe you work here? its summer you should be out in the sun!” he said whisper-yelling, with a small laugh they replied “well its easy money and i get to stay with the air conditioning i think its a win win.” putting his hand on his chin and closing his eyes, nodding his head with a hum “who am i to criticize someone whos getting that bag, consider me jealous.” getting a buzz from his pocket he took his phone out seeing tanaka asking where he is. “my friend is looking for me, will you give me the pleasure in obtaining your number?” he said looking up at them, they do the same pose he was doing a minute ago. “well you dont seem like a stalker plus i can repay you for helping me, here” they say grabbing the phone from his hand typing their number and naming the contact ‘y/l/n.’ “well mr nishinoya i will expect a response from you soon” they back up leaning on the books. “oh wait i need a contact picture everyone has one in my phone” he says with a little pride, hearing a laugh from them his smile widens “im not taking a picture i look bad right now” they say turning to the books. “fine next time i see you im getting that picture” he says, giving them a wave “bye y/l/n” waving back to him they nod.

looking back on this memory a smile appeared on their face. getting up from the vanity straightening their clothes. “you ready?” their mom asks with a small smile, looking at her baby memories coming back of their first steps, first words, first fall, first lost tooth. breaking from her thoughts to see her child nod. “okay it's almost time you look good honey” she said, walking up to them fixing any mistakes she finds. “wow i cant believe youre leaving me” looking at their mom with an eyebrow raised “hey now dont get upset with me, its yuu’s fault hes the one who proposed” they say with a smile. “well i cant really be mad, he did ask for permission hes such a gentleman” as she finishes a knock at the door alerts both of them. y/n’s friend at the door pops in. “time to shine and make the male cry y/n'' laughing at their own joke, y/n lets go of their moms hand taking a deep breath. “oh gosh dont joke about him crying i know he will'' they say laughing walking to the door. seeing all the decorations theyve picked out, seeing their family and family run around as they walk, everything feeling in slow motion. in their place their dad comes tears in his eyes. “oh dad cmon” they say nudging him. “oh hush your moms already been bugging me let me be” seeing the people in front of them move they start walking in the doors. seeing all the colors and familiar faces of friends of both parties, forward they see him. when they lock eyes his eyes go wide and he straightens up with a smile. getting to the end of the walkway, letting go of their dad and taking his hands. “wow” he says under his breath. the marriage officiant clears his throat, “i dont wish to keep these two waiting any longer lets start”

it didnt take too long keeping it short and getting to the vows. facing him with a smile, seeing him grab a piece of paper. “i actually came prepared im just that cool” showing everyone the paper getting a couple chuckles from the audience, turning back seeing your eyes watch him his smile gets even bigger. “when i first met y/n i didnt really see them, just a pile of books their coworker dumped on them, to this day i will thank that coworker and ryu for dragging me there. while im thanking people i want to thank y/n for being them, they might not see how perfect they are but in my eyes they are, no one could be or even get remotely close to how perfect i see them. i wanna thank their parents too” he says turning to them “i know its not easy to let go but thank you for trusting me to them, i promise to be the best” he says looking at both of them, determination burning in his eyes when he turns back to look at his partner. “i love you y/n now please dont make me cry with all your big words in your vows'' he says closing his eyes and bringing their joined hands to his face kissing their knuckles. chuckling at his words breaking their hands apart they grab a paper. “i make no promises yuu” seeing him deflate a little “ive had people ask me ‘what is love?’ and i never really knew how to answer besides saying ‘you just kinda know’ even looking up on google how to describe love i never really understood what they were trying to say, but now being with yuu i think i can finally grasp what ive been trying to say. being in love with someone is like surfing, your partner being the water and you being the one riding the wave. you approach the water calmy or you can rush into it, and when the wave comes depending on the size it can range from small and gentle or strong and destructive, even if you are a pro surfer you still get waves that you just cant conquer. now why i bring this up? for once in my life i can say im in love, im so helplessly in love with you yuu. youre the gentle warm wave everyone wants even if i do fall i know youll catch me and bring me to the shore, not to sound cringe and cliche but with you i do feel like i can do anything maybe even surf” laughing at your own little joke you take a breath looking up from your paper to see him. the man you didnt think youd, the man youd soon with for the rest of your life. in tears he lets out a chuckle “we can learn together” he says sniffing, taking his hands once again “im in love with you, yuu” seeing his bottom lip tremble “sir can we hurry this up i really need to kiss the love of my life right now” he says in a hushed voice, the pastor laughs and nods, “i dont think we have any objections? alright beautiful, may we have the rings?” turning to your god daughter as she walks with the rings to the front, giving both of your legs a hug she walks back. handing the rings to each of you, “nishinoya yuu do you take y/l/n y/n as your partner in life?” “yes a hundred times” he says in one breath, putting the ring on your left ring finger gently. “y/l/n y/n do you take nishinoya yuu as your life partner?” “yes, i do” coping his motions, interlocking your hands with the biggest smiles on your faces. “i have the honor of announcing you both married yuu you may kiss your partner.” not wasting time he pulls them towards him locking lips. in slow mention it felt like pulling away, the noise from friends and family, him with his eyes swelled up and red from crying, and to the ring on both of your fingers. “wow we're married” is all he says, “wow we're married” they repeat, he turns to the crowd throwing their joined hands “IM MARRIED!!!” receiving a smile and laugh from everyone, his best friend getting up “BRO YOURE MARRIED '' cheers erupt from everyone again, the sound of the waves crashing wasnt far from them and both of them are determined to catch at least one wave.

#haikyu x reader #haikyu #haikyuu #nishinoya scenarios #hq nishinoya #nishinoya oneshot #nishinoya fluff #nishinoya x y/n #nishinoya x you #nishinoya x reader #nishinoya fanfiction

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oh-for-fic-sake · 4 years

Text

Undercooked Popcorn

Masterlist

You and Konner have a mini training session in the barn and get in trouble with Clark.

Warnings: fluff, Swearing,

A/n: Here is a small fluff piece I have been working on enjoy XX

Taglist: @iloveyouyen

After the initial move to Mrs Kent's house they had given you a week to settle in before getting stuck in to your school work. Not only you but konner as well letting you both bond which you had, the both of you had become close...konner had opened up quicker than you had, already secure about his place in the family you on the other hand was less sure. You had a trouble with it you wanted to believe that you was here permanently , that this was it where you belonged but you couldnt help holdingnyour breath still waiting for something to happen. Currently you and konner was in the old barn, you'd both unconsciously decided that it was your hang out, the place you go to escape the adults and get to know one another without the eagle eyes of the others. Somewhere to get away from an overbearing Clark who seemed to take the term mother hen to a whole new level, it wasnt necessarily bad but it was hard for you to go from no one gives a shit to holy shit this guy is consistently fussing over you. You knew he was trying to be inclusive and trying to solidify your place in the family reassuring you, wanting to show you he cared. Which was good youll admit you liked the attention in a way, you'd not had this type of parental guidance for a long long time but you'd didn't realoze how suffocating it was. You also suspected that your injuries had something to do with it aswell, you couldn't exactly fault him for it.

So here you were hiding out in the barn with konner as Clark flitted about the place doing odd chores here and there .Martha had gone out to work and would be home after the lunch rush at work. You rolled across the blanket that covered the hay pile your lime green cast glowing in the noon sun you winced as the light reflected off of it and shuffled moving it into a shadowed area. Currently you and konner were shareing details about your abilities, something the both of you had avoided and danced around until you got more comfortable with each other.

"Soo you don't make things? You just stretch'em" you nodded at him as he sat above you cross legged on one of the wooden cross beams that spanned the large space.

"Yeah pretty much..I can't touch living things tho, no plants or animals or people" you said glancing at your arm sighing it would have been nice to just fix it but no you had to wait it out.

"That sucks..." you nodded mournfully but then tilted your head back to get a better look at him.

"So what about you? Your an ET wannabe right?" He laughed flipping you the bird"Fuck you" you giggled as he shook his head jumping down from the beam landing just before you.

"Kryptonian is the politically correct term I think....Well hybrid... I'm half Clarks and... Half human" he said dusting off a little to sit on the hay across from you. You noticed the hesitation and the way he swerved around his own comments. Deciding to leave it be you opted to ignore it, much to Konners relief.

"So can you do all the stuff he can?" Konner smiled and shrugged

"You mean dad? Yeah sort of, I can do most...We are still waiting to see if we're exactly alike but I've got the strength speed and flight....I can do the lazer thing to which is cool but I havent found a practical use for it yet...Or a way to practice that shit is hot." You hummed at him then looked out of the open barn doors to the corn field.

"Corn?" He tilted his head following your gaze confused

"What?" You smiled at him Sitting up letting your arms fall into your lap

"Pop some corn...I mean theres a field right there...." he looked at the rows of corn catiously.

"Popcorn...You want me to use my laser eyes to...Get you a snack? How is that gojng to help me?" You rolled your eyes at him grunting."Oh for fuck sake...get unpopped popcorn and I will throw them in the air and you pop'em with your melty eyes.... you know target practice...And if I happen to catch some with my mouth its a bonus!" He sat up a little it wasn't a bad idea but Clark wouldn't like it.He doesnt like him practicing without him here.

"What about dad? Won't he be pissed?" You laughed and shook your head.

"Not really not like anyone can see us out hear and Clark did say we can practice around the place" Konner's grin fell he was worried that you hadn't really...Adapted? well you had...But you wont refer to the others as Dad and Grandma. As far as he was concered you were his sister already but he just really wanted you to know it was okay...That you really did have a family now. His dad and Grandma had told him not to push but he got the feeling you wanted to...Somethjng was holding you back.

"..You do know he is technically your dad now to right... You can call him dad and you can call Grandma, Grandma they wont be mad....I think they would like that." you sighed looking down, you knew that but it just... You didn't know, was it disrespectful to your real parents? You'd only been here a week? Surely it was to early...Even if it felt right, natural. He waved a hand at you

"You dont have to...I just didn't want you not to.. you know..Incase you thought they didn't want you to thats all, don't want you to have stupid thoughts like that holding you back" you blinked at him smiling sadly

"I-I do but...I still dont think I will be here long...I'm gonna slip up, if I ever accidentally hurt Martha I'm gone" he frowned at you

"No...If that happens; which I don't think it will, but if it does then we deal with it togethet...you wont get very far if you do run...Me and dad will bring you back home and we talk things out .Thats what family is, we stay together and help each other, your my little sister, the first person my age I don't have to worry about hurting so much. I can relax more around you because you can protect yourself if thing get to much, you think im gonna let you leave over an accident? Fuck no like Dad keeps saying your here now, your a kent and your stuck with us...I hope you see that sooner rather then later it can't be nice always being ready to run" your lip quivered eyes filling with tears as he explained this, the conviction in his voice how he spoke with absolute certainty. Unwilling to cry in front of him you simply nodded to him. Getting the message he patted your arm then disappeared for what seemed like seconds with a small bag of unpopped corn cernals.

"Show off" you sniffed moving to wipe your eyes only to hiss when you cracked yourself on the head with your cast you whined rubbing to sore spot and froze when Konner held out some tissues to you

"I grabbed them inside" you smiled at him meekly. He gave you a soft look, he hated seeing you struggle but he had said what needed to be said, said what he had needed to hear when it was him all those years ago. Quickly he changed his expression and smirked tossing you the bag of popcorn cernals you opened them swiftly still fighting a few tears back then looked around deciding on the safest area to throw them.

"So... Just to clarify if this falls down you will save me right?" he smiled nodding"Of course I will, you will be out of here before it even started falling down" you nodded then took two cernals in hand.

"so one or two?" he smiled and held up a finger. One. you threw it up and shreiked as he tried to ignite it missing ...well you only noticed he missed when you heard the little tap of it hitting the floor you both laughed seeing two tiny holes in the side of the barn. You grabbed another and threw it up he missed again, but he ws closer than before.This carried on for another few minutes with you oth getting excited as he got closer just skimming one, the heat from his vision making it partially pop.

"Oh no that one dont count you didnt hit the fuckjng thing!" He argued

"It popped tho!" You blinked at him.

"Okay half a point ready to go again?" He fist pumped then nodded readying himslef to go agajn.Finally thirty six cernals later he got it. You both jumped up.

"FUCK YEAH WOO!" You quickly moved to the popped popcorn on the floor dusting it off then ate it, you held up your hands to him chewing slowly as if you was a food critic then shook our head.

"Yep no under cooked" you both stared then burst out into hysterics crying with laughter.

"Lets try two this time!" You nodded moving to the bag pulling two more cernals out of the bag when you turned back round you froze. Shit.

"Why are there singe holes all over this barn?" Konner jumped turning around faceing an unamused Clark, who stood frowning at the both of you with his arms crossed. You and konner shared a look then peered around the barn...There was lots of them.. Some were just peep holes others longer and had charred lines around them. In all the fun youd both forgot where you were, and the barn now looked like it had taken a spray of bullets from a firing squad.

"Well? Konner? Y/n?" You cleared your throat and smoved to stand beside Konner

"Konner was...practicing, training" Clark raised an eyebrow shifti g his weight to one foot.

"Hmm? what exactly? See how he could burn the barn down without setting it on fire?" You both winced at his tone...He really wasnt impressed.

"You know this barn is older then me? It survived me growing up playing in it, yet an afternoon with the both of you and it looks about ready to keel over?....What were you both doing?" You moved to open your mouth but Clark stopped you holding up a hand.

"And if you try to get smart with me and say training again your going to be grounded for much longer then you already are young lady!" You flinched back. Wow. He had never spoke to you like that...Well not since you met him, he was always so laid back and fun, the type of adult you listened to because they were so chill but who knew he could switch over to no nonsense stern dad so effortlessly... You wavered uncertain how to approach him like this, it had been a while since youd cared about an adults opinion of you and you really didn't want Clark to hate you turning you looked to konner for help.

"Well...we were seeing how accurate my aim was...So y/n was throwing popcorn cernals and I was trying to pop them....I did miss a few times." Clark blinked then scanned the barn. He sighed shaking his head at his son exasperated.

"Konner... We've spoke about this I will take you to the fortress to train, but not here you could hurt yourself!" Clark stopped his scolding when he saw you take a large step infront of konner

"It was my fault I wanted to see so I came up with the idea...He was just trying to cheer me up." You stood firm shaking a little, you didn't like Clark raising his voice, he didn't shout but it was enough to make you nervous of him. He fixed you with a look making you cower from him slightly then sighed shaking his head, he didn't want you to be scared of him.

"Thank you y/n. But even if it was your idea he still knows how I feel about it I'm disappointed in both of you. Your both grounded for the rest of the week, this was very reckless and I don't want to catch either of you doing this again are we clear?" You both nodded to him solonmly resigning yourself to a few days being stuck indoors. He sighed then smiled a little to tell you the truh he was happy in a way, you'd become close and were up to mischief, which was good? You could both be a little reckless and act your age. You both had someone to let loose with. But he couldn't help worrying over the two of you. Had you got to carried away the barn could have collapsed, yes konner would have most likely got you both out but you were already hurt, already vulnerable and fragile. He really didn't want to risk anything. Luckily it hadn't come to that and the damage to the barm wasn't that bad... A few new boards and a new cross beam at the top, regular humans would need to dismantle the roof to sort it out but him and konner could have it done in an afternoon, he would also have you help as he had no doubt that you'd encouraged your brother. He smiled chuckling catching the two teens by surprise.

"Popcorn...I mean it was obvious right?..Wish I'd thought of that one...Any way lets start sorting this out befor Ma gets home shouldn't take to long not like the time I-" he caught him slef noticing the looks he was getting.

"What did you do to the barn?" You asked breaking the silence as konner waited both eager to hear what Clark had gotten up to when he was little. He cleared his throat

"Never you mind, now come on get to it, start picking up all that corn the we can see about plugging some of those holes" you shared a look with konner moving slowly collecting the corn as Clark moved to the back of the barn inspecting the damage.

"What do you think he did?" Konner shrugged

"Not sure apparently according to Grandma he was a little goody two shoes so... it couldn't have been that bad"

"Im gonna ask her when she gets back" konner froze and shook his head.

"No dont! Do not do that! We don't wana be in trouble with Grandma ever, dads a piece of piss to deal with but Grandma? She is a different beast altogether...To clever with punishments I mean she perfected her methods on him... She knows what shes doing" you blinked at him.

"We? You mean you I wont get in to much trouble...I mean evidence points to you, your the one with laser eyes." You smirked impishly at him as he looked shocked.

"You'd throw me under the bus? Just like that?" You nodded

"To avoid Martha's wrath abso-fucking-lutly sorry dude but Im not getting sucked into that shit show...Actually....Dont worry I got this she will never know." Befor Either on them could ask you'd closed your eyes then opened. Konner took a step back as they glowed bright. And sure enough the small holed were closeing, you coiled the fibres of the wood around in tight circles until the holes were all coveres feeljng aroh d the planks looking for them all. Konner gasped watching the way you manipulated the planks hearing a slight tiny creaking of the wood as it bended around itself. You moved to the side looking at the damaged beam quickly knitting it back together filling in the two deep burns that ran across it. Slowly you looked back down to the other two and smiled.

"All done...The beam should hold I made the grain tighter where it was." Clark smiled as he made his way towards you patting your shoulder and giving a sweet kiss to your hair.

"Thank you y/n now I think we shouldall head inside dont you?" You stuttered as he continued past you and Konner. Who was gaping at you.

"That was so fucking awsome! You made that look so easy...Is it? Whats else can you dowith it? And your eyes shit! Even I was scared for a second..." you flushed fidgeting going all bashfull.

"Oh haha sorry for scaring you...And that was easythey were tiny holes to plug." You moved slowly following Konner and Clark to the house.

"You still gonna ask Grandma about what he did?" You nodded at him laughing.

"You bet! I wana hear about all the dumb shit he did" he smiled at you as you both made it to the kitchen. Clark had entered and was already sitting down at the table with a drink.

"Your both still grounded by the way" you pouted at him

"No fair I fixed it!" He rose a brow at you

"It wasn't about the damage, I want you both to be carefull, you were reckless and both put yourselves at risk unnecessarily so rest of the week. No phones, games or tv. No leaving the farm and you can help your Grandma and me with the chores..." you sighed and looked to konner defeated he only shrugged in responseas if to say 'nothing you can you do' you slumped down into the chair pouring yourself a glass of juice from the pitcher Konner following suit grumbling to yourselves Clark shook his head getting up placing his glass in the sink. Teenagers.

#superman imagine #superman x teen reader #superman x reader #superman x you #superman x y/n #konner kent x sister reader #clark kent imagine #clark kent x teen reader #justice league x teen reader #justice league x reader

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