#god did it feel so good

[nyashykyunnie]

˗ˏˋ One-Sided Love: In Which, you realize Jinwoo was always for Hae-In ◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕘 𝕁𝕚𝕟𝕨𝕠𝕠˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

‼️[tw: self-deprecation, depression, hanahaki disease, hurt, no-comfort, pure angst, death]‼️

╰┈➤ ❝ [ That boy was your star; but she was his sun] ¡! ❞

You stood there motionless as your eyes watched Jinwoo embrace lips that weren't yours. He was kissing Hae-in with such love. You couldn't feel anything, you couldn't shed a tear nor could you say anything. You just stood there with an empty expression.

Of course he chose her, she was always in his mind, in his heart, beyond heavens and beyond the clouds. It was her.

You were only his friend, a temporary entertainment. A tool to kill time. Your laughs and smiles, as genuine as they were Jinwoo didn't care. He just listened to you because he never had the energy to push you away, so he let you be.

My god, he should've pushed you away. He should've ignored your existence. If he did, you wouldn't have given hope. You wouldn't have clung onto a sliver of faith that he might choose you. It would've been mercy if he had just pushed you away,... But he didn't.

Now here you are, dumbfoundedly glancing over the blossoming of pure love. He was smiling at her.

"Ah....He's Beautiful..." You thought to yourself as you watched those loving grey eyes that looked at her with such endearment, with such passion, with such love that you hoped would be towards you. But no, it wasn't.

Could you blame Jinwoo? No. No you couldn't. She was so vibrant after all, a blinding sunshine that anyone would've loved.

Unlike you, you who is useless. The gloomy, the stupid one, the delusional idiot who thought you could've had a chance.

You weren't even the unfortunate second lead. No, no, no. You are too arrogant to think so. You were never a choice to begin with.

So you turned on your heel and walked away. Did you cry behind closed doors? Did you scream your heart out that night? Did you scratch your skin? Did you bite your lip until it bled? Did you cry and cry until your eyes couldn't shed tears? Who cares.

Not Jinwoo, obviously. He has his Hae-in. Why would he care about your measly existence? The boy didn't even notice when you suddenly distanced yourself, when you suddenly cut off communication, when you stopped sharing your snacks with him, when you stopped greeting him good morning, when you suddenly go home without telling him goodbye. You just withdrew yourself, and he never batted an eye. He was too busy. You're not that important, you prick.

Petals would suddenly come out of your mouth, such pretty flowers stained with your disgusting blood. The crimson red liquid shines against such vibrant petals. You truly didn't deserve such kindness to be able to cough out such beautifully-miserable things.

Your heart would bleed everyday, it was so heavy and painful and it only fuels whenever you see Jinwoo with Hae-in. God did it hurt. But damnit was he so beautiful whenever he smiles so radiantly. The smile that you could never bring out of him, the twinkle in his eyes that never belonged to you. He was just so radiant, he was your star. You loved him like the ocean.

So with a blank smile, you truly embraced your existence as a ghost until you had separated for college. But despite that, your longing continues to sprout uncontrollably and soon enough you would be puking petals left and right. You tried to forget but really, you love him more than life itself.

You could have the petals removed, but in exchange you would lose your memories of him. You didn't want that. Every pretty smile of his, every chuckle he gave, every second you spent with him— You loved every single one of it. So you chose the hard path, you chose to endure.

Like the masochistic fool you were

You loved him so dangerously that you are blindingly throwing your life away. Humans were fools to begin with anyway. Justifying everything for the sake of so-called "Love" just for the hell of it.

And at the ripe age of 19, you died in your deathbed foolishly thinking 'It's all in the name of Love.' But at what cost?

At what cost did you sacrifice your life for a man who forgot about your existence the second you pulled away?

At what cost did you sacrifice your life for someone who never cared to begin with? Jinwoo didn't even remember your existence until Beru asked about you out of a whim.

Jinwoo did try contacting your number but to no avail, so to do it in an easy way. He used his powers that came with being a monarch. The darkness engulfed his body and transported to where you were.

Your Grave.

He stared blankly at your tombstone. Emotions he didn't know would spring up suddenly washed over him and all he could feel was despair as he thought about how you looked at your final days. Did anyone see you in your final moments? What were your last words? He could never know.

Jinwoo felt guilty. Guilty at how he just ignored you. But what would his guilt do? What would his pathetic apologies do?

So with a heavy heart, he disappeared again, and returned with a bouquet of flowers. The flowers you always talked about. The flowers that made you smile so radiantly.

It is his first, and his final gift to you.

The you who is no longer by his side. He bids you a farewell, a farewell he never thought he would do. For a friend.

"Goodbye, may your dreams be pleasant as you drift in purgatory. May your soul rest. I'm sorry."

#sung jinwoo #solo leveling #sung jin woo #solo leveling headcanons #solo leveling x reader #sung jinwoo hcs #sung jinwoo headcanons #sung jinwoo x gn reader #only i level up #so here it is #my first angst #god did it feel so good #I love it and hate it at the same time

[huang-er-jiejie]

i. i just realised something about the kiss.

the way when aziraphale puts both of his hands on crowley's back, you can see them kinda shift so aziraphale isn't leaning. he held onto crowley for stability, and leaned in. pushed closer to him. he leaned forward. anyone ever says he didn't want the kiss im going to hunt you down because HE HELD CLOSE!!! HE KISSED BACK!!!!

EDIT: also im like WELL aware he kissed back i was even when i first watched it like its not a big revelation, its just that SOME people☠️ on TIKTOK☠️ KEEP SAYING HE WAS DISGUSTED BY THE KISS???? like i swear some people are watching a different show entirely

#HE KISSED BACK. ANYONE SAYS OTHERWISE I SWEAR TO GOD. #HE WANTS THE KISS!! ITS JUST THAT A PART OF HIM FEELS BAD ABOUT IT! #HE FEELS BAD FOR WANTING IT #even if they spent so long dismantling his belief of 'we're on opposite sides' #hes just always going to feel that way deep down #he wants the kiss. its just that why did it have to happen that way. #good omens #gos2 spoilers #aziraphale #crowley #anthony j crowley #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #azirafell #good omens 2 #'i forgive you' maybe in the way that the kiss can be seen as a temptation #like in the garden of eden #but crowley is the apple. he is the forbidden fruit

[murderofravens]

COCK COCK COCK COCK COCK COCK PLEASE I NEED HIM TILL I CRY NEED HIM TILL I VOMIT NEED HIM TILL I PISS MYSELF PLEASE PLEASE IM GONNA BE SICK PLEASE I NEED HIS COCK OR I'LL DIE NEED IT NEED HIM TO FUCK ME SO BAD HIS COCK POPS OUT THROUGH MY THROAT PLEASE JUST ONCE PLEASE JUST ONE CHANCE I KNOW ITS HUGE I NEED IT SO BAD

#MY GOD HE LOOKS SO GOOD I FEEL SICK TO YM STOAMCH #OK HO MEYWJEYANSYWB THEY DID TJIS FOR MEEEEE #my yuuji <3 #yuji itadori #yuji itadori x reader #Jujutsu kaisen x reader

[petricorah]

scenes i loved from Real Enough to Get Me Through by @marriedzukka <333 [ids in alt]

#zukka #zukka fanart #sokka #sokka fanart #zuko #zuko fanart #atla #atla fanart #avatar the last airbender #zukka fic rec #myart #yall. yall. dani. this FIC #first off it made me cry twice. not like 'oh im crying' internet speak no. like. eyes are too blurry to read let me stop this for a sec #it is SO GOOD #your prose? amazing #your insights on grief? life changing #THEM??? THEM their relationship and trust #'zuko looked at him and his world shifted on its axis' #ive been thinking about that line for WEEKS STRAIGHT #i can't tell you how many passages i screenshot just because of how beautiful or cute they were #the moment of seeing the painting of sokka's mom? how did you manage to make it so telling character wise--so sweet so PAINful AND so #cute with their relationship?!!?! #'oh so you think i'm beautiful too' #GOD #i had so many scenes i wanted to draw it was crazy #also #'Our loved ones leave impressions on us that can still impact our decisions and feelings even after they're gone' #fuck. had me crying AGAIN #seriously this fic is so wonderful and not just through a zukka lens. truly life changing you're an AMAZING writer #the fandom is so lucky to have you and i can't Believe it took me so long to get around to reading this masterpiece

[sivsii]

I sincerely hope every artist gets to have the experience of falling in love with their art someday. even if you have to fight for it. i think we all deserve to look at the result of our creativity all giddy and go holy shit, I loved making this! I love the lines I put down and the colors I used and the indulgences I’ve taken. I love seeing things I liked and taking it for my own, pushing and molding and playing. I can’t wait to do it again

#art stuff #maybe this is just me being all mushy or whatever but GOD #i used to hate my art so fucking much #i used to hate the act of creating so deeply that putting pen to paper knotted up my insides #and I don’t know HOW I grew through that but I did! i genuinely thought it was the end of such an important part of who I am #but it wasn’t! #and now for the last few years I’ve been consistently able to look at my art and feel proud of myself? like holy shit I made this! #i have such good taste! #and there have been times where I’ve hated the process or been dissatisfied with theresult ofc #art is fucking hard #art block and burnout is a bitch #but Ive still been able to look at the sum of my journey and just feel. satisfied. and accomplished #eager for growth but still proud of what I’ve made #idk #we all deserve that someday

[theoldkyokodied]

Uploading all my Tomgreg art at once from the past few week before season 4 hits, who knows in what kind of mental state i'm gonna be once it does :')

#tomgreg #succession #dont even talk to me i started watching this show when i had nothing to do at work and now i watch it with averiel my good friend averiel #and we are going to watch s4 together and i feel physically ill from bein so excited #so ya thats what ive been up to... anyway. i love these idiots they desever nothing but the worst (affectionate) #im also a tomshiv lover btw. im the one who yells 'THIS IS HOW TOMSHIV CAN STILL WIN' while they are actively losing on screen #thats the kind of person i am #dont look at me (lying on the floor) #okay i was not going to say stuff in the tags and let the art speak for itself but i NEED to point out details in the wine Painting.. #i put a lot of work into that one. thinly veiled metaphors and symbolism yknow.. #greg is gripping the stem of the wine glass with his full fist. tom and greg are dressed in the same outfit (sock garters included) #greg look appalled but he is not doing anything about the spill. tom is fondly pouring greg more and more wine. he is doing him a favor #i colored the red wine the same way i would color blood :) oh and tom is not really touching greg #only holding the chair in place. greg is making himself look smaller than he is like usual #oh and @ the person who said that it's the inverse of the tom and nate scene i love the way you think. i did not think of that before #but god. yeah. i actually thought about the scene change from when roman uhh.. christens his office in s1. the one with the coffee machine #i always go insane at that cut. this is not exactly the same since it's more.. about emotions but yknow.. it can be.. the same...

[fuckyeahisawthat]

“I don’t think that is what God wants. And I don’t think you want it either.”

This line of Aziraphale’s in the Job minisode keeps sticking out to me. Because this is the heart of the problem, right? This is how Aziraphale can see Crowley so completely and also not at all.

Because yes they suck at open communication and yes it’s because they had to hide their relationship for thousands of years and have so so so much trauma and fear to work through. But ALSO they actually do have a profound difference in how they see the world that keeps coming between them, and it’s not just theoretical but deeply personal to both of them.

Because Aziraphale still wants to believe that God is good. He can’t let go of that because his whole identity is wrapped up in being an angel of the Lord, and if God’s not good then what has he been doing for his entire existence?

And so when bad things are happening he falls back on This cannot be what God wants. The whole of season one, he refuses to believe that God could really want the world to end—even though we now know he knew this was a possibility before the world even started. He keeps going up the chain of command, trying to find someone to intervene. “That’s why I’m going to have a word with the Almighty and then the Almighty will fix it.” As if God doesn’t have all the information or hasn’t been paying attention.

And really, the events of season one reinforce this worldview for him. Because if the Archangel Fucking Gabriel isn’t sure what God wants, then maybe God did want them to stop Armageddon. Maybe it was Aziraphale and Crowley who were doing God’s work after all.

He’s gotten as far as realizing that Heaven’s orders are not the same thing as God’s will, but he still hasn’t detached the concepts of Good and Right from God in his worldview.

Crowley is a good person who does the right thing so he must still be an angel deep down. “I know the angel you were.” The only way Aziraphale can conceptualize Crowley saving Job’s children is, “Come on, you’re a little bit on our [God’s] side.” So Crowley’s fall was a mistake; Crowley belongs in Heaven, where he was so happy before the Fall. Why wouldn’t he want to be an angel again? And yeah maybe Heaven sucks now but God is still good, so there’s hope that the system can be reformed with a change of leadership, and Heaven can be made to actually do good, the way God always intended.

But that’s not how Crowley sees the world at all. He is operating with an entirely different understanding of reality. Because he figured out a long time ago (at least by the time of the Job job, but probably long before that) that you can’t base your sense of morality on what you think God wants. Not just because you don’t know for sure, but because sometimes God’s plans are fucking awful. God in Good Omens is not kind to Her creations. She doesn’t tolerate questions or doubts or disobedience. She’s capricious, turning on the creatures She made and killing a bunch of them when She’s in a bad mood. She punishes indiscriminately and disproportionately. She wagers human lives like gambling chips. The kids were supposed to be dead no matter who won the bet.

I think it’s interesting that Crowley is the one who introduces the idea in season one of “What if the Almighty planned it like this all along? From the very beginning.” That’s probably a comforting thought to Aziraphale, soothing his anxieties about going against Heaven right when he is feeling acute distress at the idea of no longer having a side. (And, in that particular moment, no longer even having a bookshop.)

But it’s not a comforting thought to Crowley. Have you seen what happens when God has a plan for you? It fucking sucks. Woe betide you if you’re the Barbie God decides to play with today. (At bare minimum, you’re coming back with some burn marks and a weird haircut.)

I’ve brought up the line “There are no right people. There’s just God, moving in mysterious ways and not talking to any of us” before, and I tend to focus on the “there are no right people” part. But also, there’s just God.

Aziraphale tends to draw a distinction between God’s will and Heaven’s orders when it suits him, and collapse that distinction when it doesn’t. Crowley almost never differentiates between God and Heaven. There’s just God, and She’s not going to explain why this is happening or listen to pleas for mercy (although Crowley still tries). You can’t trust Heaven or Hell, and you can’t count on God to show up and make everything all right. Sometimes God is in fact the reason that things are not all right. You’re on your own.

(And. Look. Crowley is right on this one. There are certainly aspects of their relationship where they’re both equally responsible for things being a shitshow, but the text is pretty unambiguous about Crowley, a demon, having the most accurate read on the nature of God in the world of Good Omens out of any of the metaphysical characters.)

Crowley rebuilt his entire sense of self, alone, after the Fall. He created himself anew and developed his own moral compass and sense of identity independent of both Heaven and Hell. “The angel you knew is not me.” When Crowley does the right thing, that’s not his angel-ness shining through; that’s just Crowley.

And from a like, trauma recovery point of view, it’s actually very healthy for him to have the realization that sometimes God’s just kind of a dick. He didn’t do anything to deserve getting kicked out of Heaven. None of them did. Just God messing them about because She didn’t like being questioned, or She wanted to see what would happen, or She needed two sides for Reasons and didn’t much care who was on one or the other, or She’s playing some fucked up little game for Her own amusement. (And if there was some Great Plan that required Crowley to fall…well, that is also fucked up. Because it doesn’t matter if there was a reason. It still hurt.)

And while Crowley in general is extremely patient with Aziraphale and his slow, halting journey away from Heaven…it’s gotta sting, every time Aziraphale doesn’t want to believe that God could be cruel, when Crowley is standing right fucking there. It’s gotta hurt when Aziraphale refuses to see something that Crowley knows to be true through his own lived experience. Because it should be enough. What happened to him should be enough to make someone who loves him walk away from Heaven and never look back. And it isn’t.

But of course Crowley is one hundred percent not going to talk about this, if he is even fully self-aware about having these thoughts, because it’s far too painful and vulnerable. (He talks to plants, goats, God, and no one in a bar at the end of the world, but never to Aziraphale.) And so he says “Tell me you said no” and “I think I understand a lot better than you do” because he can’t say Choose me. Just this once, choose me and he can’t say Believe me.

And Aziraphale is not going to think about all this and work it out for himself, because he has a massive lump of denial centered around exactly this thing, that sometimes God hurts people who didn’t do anything to deserve it. I’m sure he’s thought about the Fall in abstract terms, enough to be afraid of it, but not in terms of this is a thing that happened to a person I love. And he has certainly not allowed himself to draw any conclusions about the nature of God from it, because that is far too scary a prospect.

And so they’re stuck. Until they can figure out how to remove this massive landmine from the center of their relationship, they are going to keep having the same fight over and over again, and they’re going to keep hurting each other without fully understanding why.

#do you know HOW HARD it is to write genuine ideological conflict that also feels deeply personal?? and they did it SO WELL #i am in awe tbh #good omens #good omens s2 #ineffable husbands #crowley #aziraphale #heaven #hell #god #the god in good omens is not nice and you can’t convince me otherwise #is a tag i have from s1 and i’m sticking with it #fall thoughts

[lesbaurinkos]

they call me the world’s number one fan of dnp’s ffxiv catboys (who bought matching red and blue carbuncle mounts if you care). just like they call fditl the most important video to ever exist in the world

#do u guys even care. that they bought. MATCHING RED AND BLUE CARBUNCLE MOUNTS IN FFXIV #BECAUSE I CARE SOOOOO MUCH #THOSE COST REAL MONEY DID U KNOW THAT. AND THEY GOT MATCHING ONES. IF U CAREEEEE #can more phannies pleaaaasee also be xiv girlies like this knowledge is so important to me and few understand…… #anyways also. i keep rewatching fditl to cope with the dapg drought. as we all must do. obvi #and those sweaters i got an ad for on instagram and was like holy shit…… dude……… dnp for real #so anyway im having the time of my life lately. god bless! #dan and phil #dnp #daniel howell #phil lester #phanart #<- tag that truly brought me back to being 13 again. feels good feels organic. AMEN!

[abstractfrog]

My comic for The Retired Colourman! I love this scene between Mariana and Sherlock sm

#sherlock & co #sherlock and co #sherlock holmes #mariana ametxazurra #its 2 am and everything hurts but this was soo worth it. the colour and composition came out exactly how i wanted #the text alone probably took me 2 hours bcus i insist on handwriting it. good god. #anyway i love their friendships so mcuh its so lovely. this scene!!!! #some creative liberty was taken #what else did i want to say uhmm #oh yeah i predict silver blaze will make me feel shrimp emotions so i wanted to get this comic done before that. comes out #if theres a super compelling scene in silver blaze i Will have to make a comic. the rules #anyway gnight

[liauditore]

cw// implied character death, double life nonsense

because you are love itself.

#my art #trafficblr #double life #divorce quartet #<-- insane about how scott killed pearl in limlife. #this comic has been sitting unfinished in my files for a good month its def not finished to my usual quality but god it needed to be done #so uh scott... yeah. i like villain scott but not pure evil scott. i like a scott whos scared of being loved and manipulates others to spar #himself the pain. i like a scott who ditched pearl because their friendship was actually becoming real and when the server gods confirmed i #with DL he freaked out a bit and ran off. #ofc u can interpret this comic however u want but i was just thinking way too hard abt smajhor #i feel like often ppl get divided into scott did nothing wrong vs scott is pure evil alot of the time #which is understandable cus like i said with fanart/fic u only have so much space to show someones personality #but idk i like him all angsty. like i know im a bad person but to keep myself safe i need to keep being like this. #hes so blorbo *puts him in a blender* #i hate him *wraps him up in a blanket and takes him home* #cw implied death #cw implied violence #scott #pearl

[mewtwo24]

I finally finished reading the fourth volume of svsss in full, and thing is--the first time through I only read the bingqiu content because I was ravenous for more of their happy ending.

Turns out that was a perilous mistake.

Because I started reading the airplane extras. And I swear to god. MXTX is trying to kill me

What do you MEAN demon lord Binghe was sitting on his big fucking throne. All stoic and forbidding. Surrounded by his demon generals who don't know shit about human courtship. Asking them what he should do, fully demoralized by constant rejections from sqq, only to have airplane tell him to act more pathetic and needy. Which is already hysterically funny and insane, UNTIL LBH'S RESPONSE IS THIS, KILLING ME INSTANTLY:

LUO BINGHE. WHY DOES HE SAY IT LIKE: "I already tried that, didn't work--nothing works :/ not mean, not maidenly, not housewife, not spicy, not capable disciple. Is doubling down on clingy really all it will take? What's a born hater with only one love in his life to do????"

The dichotomy of him sitting there like 'how can I reach the unfathomable depths of shizun's heart?' A HEART HE'S ALREADY WON OVER, MIND and then in the Holy Mausoleum solving the puzzle without blinking and being like 'oh yeah you just have to hit the acupoints, no sweat.' Literally the comedy writes itself I'm so--

How am I supposed to be normal about this. MXTX understands the juicy quintessential queer joy of a person with the world's power at their fingertips wishing only for love. Willing to do anything to earn that love, when unbeknownst to them it's already been freely given. Totally not screaming and yelling and clawing at the walls

And that's not even touching airplane's uproarious account of events. The way he's like 'lol what's next, lbh and sqq are best friends now? smfh' only to see lbh TACKLE SQQ LOVINGLY. FOR SQQ TO BE BASHFUL ABOUT IT BUT SO SO FOND OF THE LITTLE SCAMP. This when we've been experiencing sqq's constant inner monologue of 'I'm so cool and so dignified about my role, truly the epitome of propriety and poser-level fortitude.' Meanwhile, in their universe:

Airplane constantly flaming???? Sqq and lbh in his observations????? His absolute bewilderment and confusion????? Legendary. No notes every single second of this shit was hilarious.

Airplane's comment that sqq + older adolescent lbh traveling together was just watching a couple in their honeymoon phase. OR the fact that lbh is exceedingly petty and refuses to share their food in the wake of airplane's interruption of their time together, until sqq relents sheepishly and insists airplane eat what's left (ONLY AFTER PLACATING LBH WITH MORE FOOD FROM HIS PLATE, SOBBING)

Watching airplane salivate over Mobei-Jun and acting like that's totally normal behavior. Finding out mbj and airplane got together first. Finding out sqq encouraged airplane. LIKE THIS. WHILE HE IS STILL IN DENIAL ABOUT HIS OWN FEELINGS:

Mobei-jun clearly thinking their arrangement is a forever thing, heartbroken his human abandoned him with all the hapless fury of a scorned wife swept away by false promises of fidelity. Airplane writing demons to be the type to beat up their crush lovingly and still unable to connect the dots about mbj's feelings. Mbj letting him go and respecting his wishes, only relenting when there's indication airplane was poorly processing his own feelings and didn't actually want to leave. Mbj caring for him and listening to him as soon as airplane voices what he needs directly and with clarity. None of these gays are functional and it's everything to me

Unrelated, but I physically can't hold this information in anymore:

I'm still reeling from younger lbh having his sexual awakening from the image of sqq wrapped in the immortal binding cables. Condemn me as you like he was so, so real for that.

And no I will not be taking any comments about how luo bingge couldn't bear to see luo binghe cherished in ways he never got to have and all the haunting implications of that. I will also not be taking any comments about luo binghe's instinct to look for sqq in that alternate universe, only to be shaken to the very core to be unable to find his shizun anywhere. The unspeakable and latent horror of his relentless mind likely piecing together what happened, but unable to say it; to suspect what is true, and live with the harrowing confusion of his double's actions. To blame himself, to assume that he had let his anger get the better of him in that world and result in unspeakable folly...

I also refuse to talk about how heartrending it is to hear Tianlang-jun weakly say "In the end, I really can't bring myself to hate humans." The implication that the foolishness of that hope and bright-eyed fondness--the very thing that put him through such unspeakable agony--couldn't be beaten out of him entirely. To discover that his faith in Su Xiyan hadn't been misplaced, to the contrary: his beloved hadn't scorned him at all, but rather fought to the miserable end to protect the fruition of their genuine feelings of love when she couldn't protect tlj or herself.

How MXTX has sqq deliberately draw parallels between their situation and that of ygy+sj and tlj+sx; desperately wishing it might not be too late for them. The concept of breaking cycles of abuse and harm pervasive throughout the newly devised story, how it evolves for the better only when love takes the place of power, pride, and domination. How the moment sqq chooses vulnerability instead of saving face, the genre shifts to the so-called "cringe" girly genre where most if not every character is more fulfilled, more true to themselves. How the "male-oriented" former genre was aimlessly sensationalized and sexualized, how it was a sustained performance of aspirational toxic masculinity. How men objectify other men without end. All of the unspoken gendered implications that come with that.

Anyways. Going to go put my head in a sandbox and try to process everything I just witnessed because even a second reading is not enough to find a modicum of closure.

#svsss #bingqiu #moshang #i swear to god this series is just 'gay man who doesn't know shit inflicting his delusional reality on everyone else and inciting chaos' #and literally it's slapstick levels of hilarious every single time; mxtx never change #also i fully agree that we did not get NEARLY enough mobei-jun and sqh/airplane content #the amount of mental illness to mental illness communication going on there was astonishing #mobei-jun being afraid of his uncle and bringing sqh because that's the only person he trusts fully (WAILING NOISES) #sqh having a tantrum but running away because for the first time he was honest about his needs + his dissatisfaction with catering to other #how that reflects his narrative compulsions and how he felt forced to warp more creative story paths for the sake of survival as a writer #how sqq's restoration of much of his original intent--as well as mobei-jun's acceptance of his needs--helps airplane begin to heal #how his happiness begins; how just like sqq he wanders in such confusion and denial before he's forced to realize what truly matters to him #SHREK VOICE: STORIES HAVE. L A Y E R S #it feels like modern day shakespeare and when i say that i don't mean it in a hollow elevating sense i mean it more like #mxtx just hits that perfect balance of poignance but also hilarious concentric circles of botched communication and brainworms #okay but real talk for a minute? .........;-; #the way lbh constantly struggles with such a crushing feeling that he'll be abandoned over any little mishap/thing/problem #really hit me where it hurts??? if only because its so clearly an anxiety that stems from original goods' upbringing #the way it becomes even more heartrending when you think back to all the sect leaders clamoring that he should have been killed as an infan #that he should have been aborted as a fetus--insisting right in front of him that his birth was a mistake and a disgrace #over having demon blood in his veins. like my god that scene is so viscerally upsetting i struggle to read it #the way its so easy to see the demons as a manifestation of otherness in precipitated form #how both sqq and sqh are influenced by human rhetoric without evening meaning to--assuming the worst against their better judgment #how both sqq and sqh both struggle with their own otherness in different ways and only find solace when they begin to accept who they are #how their lovers (lbh and mbj respectively) both are willing to navigate those confusing waters with them #how both demons love them as they are--accept them as they are despite how difficult forgiveness of perceived betrayal is for them #ty mxtx for changing my brain chemistry #as i get older i have such a fondness for the messiness of thematic queer self-discovery and growth into self-acceptance #that and how youth can so easily be defined by perfectionistic self-harm and the violence of repression

[b4kuch1n]

siren

#bakuspecial #cw: nudity #cw: body horror #monster #siren! I think. they're bird to me #I think this has been brewing since that stream mim did of drawing dnd monsters only from official text description #and when the official art for the sirens were shown I was like. oh thats just a woman with wings #lmao like. granted. its an official dnd book available for all audience. you cant make it too Bad To Look At #(I do not agree with this but it wasnt about me. if its about me its gonna be about very few people lmao) #but yeah. after that I got slightly too into the idea of putting more bird into birdwoman #but I also do genuinely love monsters that are Rearranged Human Parts so. I couldnt commit too much to the bird scales Im so sorry #I wanted the fleshiness. the feel. textural experience of holding her hands and being like oh that's a human #even when ur eyes tell u otherwise. mmm #...I looked to my right as I was typing these tags and saw. the fucked up pikmin I tried to sculpt the other day along with the pin #and got startled #its so. its so fucked up. gods. dusty white naked grainy parsnip #I used to have that one doll I butchered wanting to customize in a box next to me and thats way less upsetting than this. man #its perfect actually I will never throw this thing away. anyways #now. now I go to bed. its sleep time for the baku #have a good night lads! you CAN have it both way easily you just need a big bat

[blended-ice]

Katsudon Piroshki!

#I’ve been wanting to make this for so LONG #I’m happy I finally did #I love drawing them all smooshed together baking #that’s good family feels #putting Mila and Sara there because they’re important to me #and I think Mila unofficially sort of lives with yurio and Nikolai and they are siblings in that capacity #this was chaotic to draw and u can tell I skimped on the rendering BUT WHATEVER AHAH #drawing this brought me joy and thus it is good art 💅 #also I’m incredibly excited for fhjy coming Jan 10 so like I might draw non yoi stuff for that #who knows the whims of the art gods #yuri on ice #yoi #katsuki yuuri #viktor nikiforov #peas n guac #id in alt text #fanart #viktuuri #cooking together #sara crispino #mila babicheva #nikolai plisetsky #yuri plisetsky #katsuki hiroko #katsuki toshiya

[longelk]

did you know kaycee's username on ebay is "Leshys_Gurl", we see from luke carders emails on the official inscryption site

just learned this and thought you should know, im in shock

WHY DID I ONLY LEARN THIS LIFECHANGING PIECE OF KAYCEE LORE JUST NOW OH MY GOD

#I FEEL LIKE IM GOING TO DIE THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR LETTING ME KNOW #GIRL WHATS WRONG WITH YOU #sjdfhsdfsdffdhgdfhiohvofdvj9dug903r900f9 s00cmu0us0f #ask #kaycee hobbes #inscryption #im maintagging this everyone needs to know her fucking bymbo ebay username #good fucking grief i need to lay down #ive surprisingly never went to the inscryption website despite knowing about it forever #i went there to confirm this is real. luke bought a legendaria pack from her #also why the fuck was she alive in 2021 did she not die years before #mf selling card packs off ebay as a gost. god shes so fucking lame

[mintybagels]

YOU DONT UNDERSTAND!!! CROWLEY ALWAYS SHOWED UP FOR AZIRAPHALE FOR ALL HIS WEIRD LITTLE SCHEMES AND SITUATIONS BUT WHEN CROWLEY WANTED AZI TO TRUST HIM ABOUT HEAVEN HE LEFT CROWLEY ALL ALONE

#also why tf did aziraphale let crowley just remain living in his car #it’s midnight and i just rewatched episode 6 for references #crowley ain’t perfect either but god i just feel so awful #i’m drawing sth rn i’m probably going to cry over loll #good omens 2 #good omens #good omens spoilers #mint screams

[doomingthenarrative]

all the baldur’s gate 3 companion storylines. is just loving someone enough to break them free from the cycle. understanding that what they think they want isn’t good for them. valuing their character more than their power.

#minthara literally says ‘shadowheart becoming a dark justiciar would be good for us but bad for her’ #if you choose not to ascend astarion he thanks you for saving him from the same hunger for power that trapped cazador #lae’zel realizes that she was raised to die and bring her queen to higher power #karlach has a fuckign. bomb in her chest. and she wants to die with it #wyll is constantly sacrificing himself for the good of the city and his father #and gale only wants the power to become a god so that he may never be hurt by one again #‘did you love me enough to save me from myself’core fr #i feel so bad for all of them #idk im just Thinking #baldur's gate 3 #saiph speaks #bg3