#hes literally dying and all hes thinking about is endeavors approval

[kurgy]

i know nothing about bnha other than what my bf has told me. didnt endevour leave dabi for dead? like assuming he wasnt strong enough? how do ppl like him.

you've activated blorbo brain I apologize in advance

so Endeavor and his wife Rei had 4 children, Endeavor only got married to Rei specifically and had children because he wanted to create a child with the "perfect quirk" to fulfill his dream of surpassing the number 1 hero, All Might, Endeavor being the number 2 hero. even in universe, this practice is highly controversial for pretty obvious eugenics reasons

Touya/Dabi was his first attempt

Touya was born with a fire quirk, like his father, except it was much stronger than Endeavors. even though he didn't get a child with fire and ice like he wanted, Endeavor was certain that Touya was perfect for fulfilling his dream.

shortly after Touya was born they had a daughter, Fuyumi, who only had ice, and was immediately not up to Endeavors standards, I don't think Endeavor even knew she lived there

then they had Natsuo, who I believe also had ice? idk but same thing with Fuyumi happened here

Touya's flames were very strong, but soon they started to hurt and burn him. most fire users have a natural immunity to fire. Touya however, didn't. he has a much stronger immunity to ice

Touya's entire life revolved around Endeavor and getting his praise. He started training Touya for combat at age 5, specifically showing him to burn hotter. he loved his dad, and in his own words "wanted to make him happy" but when his flames began seriously hurting him, Endeavor concluded he was incapable of fulfilling his dream

so they had their 4th child, Shoto, who was born with the perfect quirk of fire and ice that Endeavor wanted, and Touya, who lived his whole life training for Endeavor, being the center of some...very unhealthy and dangerous attention, was fully replaced with Shoto, who was "perfect"

mentally, Touya already wasn't doing well with the pressure of Endeavors dream, the training, and the burns, but once he realizes he essentially lost all purpose for living, deemed a "failure" his mental state began spiraling further downward. verbally lashing out, burning himself, and pulling out his hair, training in secret because he's still trying to win Endeavors approval, were all very blatant signs this 13 year old needed help, and nobody did anything

it got to a point where in a fit of mania and emotional uncertainty, Touya cries and begs Endeavor to see what he can do with his flames to prove his birth wasn't a mistake, something Endeavor rejects, causing Touya to lashes out and direct that anger at his baby brother, which Endeavor puts a stop to very quick. possibly not in the best way

Touya regrets this, and later asks Endeavor to meet him on Sekoto peak, in the mountains where Touya trains, to see what he's accomplished.

so Touya waits there, and Endeavor never comes. In his unstable emotional and mental state he lashes out with fire, burning himself and igniting a forest fire where Touya burned alive

the only thing authorities found were a damaged jaw bone, concluding that Touya must have died in the fire

Endeavor blames Rei for this

but he didn't die! AFO (the main 100 year old antagonist) finds him, literally burned to a crisp and dying, and takes him back to his weird backup child facility where they reconstruct his body and he lays comatose for 3 years.

when he wakes up, he insists to go home and apologize to his family and show his dad his power

they explain hes been asleep for 3 years, that his family moved on, and that with his quirk being so unpredictable, doesn't have much longer to live

hes 16-17 at this point, and after being denied the ability to go home, breaks out and runs back home anyway

he makes it, walks inside, and finds Endeavor training Shoto the same way he trained him, that even his "death" couldn't break the cycle of abuse, and just snaps.

Touya prays at his own alter, and adopts the name Dabi before fucking off for about a decade

no one knows where he was or what he was doing during this time

then he comes back specifically to ruin Endeavors life and career

so, how do people like Endeavor? easy! he felt kinda bad about all of it once his kids were old enough to fight back and bnha fans love worshipping abusive dudes that do the bare minimum like they're gods

#blorbo posting

[originaldouble]

i'm going to jump off a building

#bnha #mha #mva #lov #bnha 350 #dabi #touya todoroki #im not okay #hes literally dying and all hes thinking about is endeavors approval

[hamliet]

What Does It Mean to Save?

I keep seeing it said that Deku, Ochaco, and Shouto will “save” Shigaraki, Himiko, and Dabi, but that there will be no redemption and/or no survival for them. I’m truly not trying to vague these posts and everyone is entitled to their opinion, but literary criticism is fundamentally responsive so I’m writing this anyways.

I personally think that’s not BNHA’s definition of saving nor of redemption. So here, have a deep dive into literary tropes related to redemption, genre, and character arcs as they pertain to BNHA and the question of: what does it mean to save Shigaraki, Touya, and Himiko?

Before we begin, let me say that while we might be personally uncomfortable with redemption (there’s a redemption arc in BNHA I am personally quite uncomfortable with), that doesn’t inherently mean the narrative won’t go there. The key principle I’m operating on here is BNHA’s message that heroes save people. It’s held up as the highest ideal. 

So let’s talk redemption in BNHA-verse. With this guy, whose redemption arc I dislike in principle but accept as part of the story so don’t come for me stans and/or antis. I’m analyzing because it shows us what redemption means in BNHA-verse, whether or not that is satisfying to you personally as it fits/does not fit with your own morality/philosophy.

If Endeavor can be redeemed and live, and he’s Bakugou’s negative foil, I highly doubt Shigaraki and Deku as well as Touya and Shouto and Ochaco and Himiko will be any different. Why? Because Enji is an adult character. The others--well, Himiko’s age we don’t know, but we do know that Shigaraki and Dabi are technically adults. But does the story consider them adults?

(It doesn’t.)

Child-coded characters are generally more likely to survive a redemption, which I’ll explain more later. First I have to define what I mean by child-coding, because I DO NOT mean this in the way it’s often (mis)used in fandom wank. Child-coding is a real thing, but it is not done to infantilize and it has nothing to do with shipping.

Child coding frames the character as a child for a few narrative purposes to convey a story’s theme or purpose. For example, if it’s a coming of age story coding a character as a child even if they legally are not emphasizes their journey to an understanding of self-actualization, or a true understanding of self with self-awareness and an understanding of self-value. An example of an adult coded as a child is The Kite Runner, wherein Amir is a legal adult for half the story, even married for fifteen years so we’re talking 30s-40s, but he does not truly become an adult until he returns to his homeland and takes responsibility for a childhood sin. In Attack on Titan, the main characters are now nineteen, but are still struggling to take responsibility as adults and have only started doing so now that their mentors/parental figures have started dying.

Along those lines, in any kind of story, you can code a character as a child of someone, regardless of biological relationship, to convey the type of relationship they have (usually a mentor one). For an example of this, see Bungo Stray Dogs’ Dazai and Akutagawa. Despite their two year age difference, Dazai recruited him to the mafia, abandoned him, and Akutagawa desperately seeks his approval. Usually in these stories a character will “overcome” their parental figure. This can be done through overcoming their need for the parental figure’s approval in stories where the parental figure is kindly (such as in Harry Potter, when in the final book Harry, Ron, and Hermione leave the Weasleys to find the Horcruxes despite Mrs. Weasley’s please) or through like, killing/stopping/leaving the parental figure when they are abusive (see fairy tales like Rapunzel and Cinderella). The parental link to self-actualization is because it is childlike (and a part of actual psychology that is reflected in literature) to see yourself as a part of your parent; self-actualized person would see yourself as a distinct person from your parent, but also acknowledge the ways in which they’ve shaped you.

So, how do you code a character as a child? BNHA isn’t subtle about it, because Horikoshi seldom is subtle about anything. The villain trio are all coded as children.

Shigaraki Tomura:

Who cannot achieve self-actualization so long as AFO has access to his body, as he’s literally trying to possess him. He’s trying, but it’s not gonna work because Shigaraki can’t keep AFO and become an adult at the same time. It’s a choice the narrative is setting up: your dream of destroying, or your freedom? (To get the latter, he’ll probably have to destroy AFO).

Todoroki Touya, who is repeatedly emphasized as a small child when compared to his siblings, and yes, I know he’s now tall. Specifically he’s spotlighted as the child of Endeavor:

And he’s the least self-actualized one in a lot of ways, contradicting himself constantly. I’m not Endeavor, DUH! But these are Endeavor’s flames! He’s gonna have to choose one or the other, because the tragic irony is that the more he takes out his rage on those around him, the more like Endeavor he becomes.

And Toga Himiko (who might well literally be a legal child), who is actually the most self-actualized one thus far, because she rejects Curious’s child insistence (Curious holds her in a Pieta pose, based on Michelangelo’s statue wherein Mary holds a deceased Christ):

She’s still got, like, a way to go though:

Because Himiko also wants to be like the people she loves to the point where she loses her own identity in them, which is er, not self-actualization. So she’ll have to choose whether or not she really wants to be like the people she loves or whether she wants to live her own way, which she herself tells us how that would end (death):

Deku said it himself: it’s good to focus on what someone is doing now. And look, I have issues with this statement and how it’s framed. I’ve talked about it at length and it was doomed to fail because Shouto himself told us long ago that it was annoying to hear a righteous speech by a stranger when you hadn’t gone through the same, plus Endeavor kinda failed by choosing being a hero over a dad here. But, the principle is that if the past doesn’t preclude Endeavor from seeking a better self, why would it preclude three characters coded as children, one of whom is literally somewhat the product of Endeavor’s sins? BNHA doesn’t think the past keeps someone from a better future. 

So what about Dabi’s counterpoint, which is indeed valid? Well, redemption doesn’t mean the past forgets, either. It’s complicated and nuanced, and we can debate how well Horikoshi strikes this nuance (it’s got its flaws), and admittedly I don’t know how this will go down in the future. But it is asking Endeavor: how do you redeem yourself to the people you’ve hurt? And we have Endeavor asking this question to Touya’s shrine. I mean, the foreshadowing is obvious. Endeavor has to redeem himself by trying to save Touya. However, it will still probably come down to Shouto to save Touya.

For our three villains, it’s a little harder to predict... well, sort of. For Shigaraki it’s extremely obvious: he has to help take down AFO. Dabi probably has to do something to help his family (siblings probably), but it’s vague. Toga needs help and not condemnation, but presumably she’ll help Ochaco with something.

So, is this redemption? I’d define it as redemption in the eyes of the narrative. To address what makes a redemption is another essay unto itself, but if we bring in the oft-compared Star Wars example: did Darth Vader get a redemption? Did Ben Solo? Everyone says yes to both. However, only Luke witnesses Vader’s redemption, and only Rey Ben Solo’s. So the rest of the galaxy? Doesn’t think so. When I say they’ll be redeemed, I’m defining it as their role in the eyes of the narrative, not whether or not society will accept them or even whether their victims will forgive them (of note, in canonical novels, Leia never forgave Darth Vader despite learning he was her father and obviously knowing Luke’s account of his redemption was true).

So, redemption in a narrative doesn’t mean all of society has to forgive and accept them. Dabi has still like, murdered 30 people--many of whom were thugs, but he himself acknowledges they didn’t deserve to die. Additionally, he himself also acknowledges that the families left behind--their feelings matter:

But why does that mean they have to die? Why even does it mean they have to languish in prison forever? (If there’s even a safe prison at the end of BNHA which I kinda have doubts about.) Heroes have also killed: see Hawks as Exhibit A. In fact, some people want revenge on the heroes precisely because they arrested or killed their loved ones (jail isn’t held up as a rehabilitative place in BNHA’s world. In most countries it isn’t in real life, either, but again that’s for another essay). So why don’t the League’s feelings on Twice’s death matter just as much as the feelings of unnamed and unseen (and thereby less important narratively) characters?

Additionally, regarding death... the villains routinely get called on their death wishes. Himiko’s determination to decide how/when she dies is called out because this is right  before Twice overcomes his trauma to save her, and the next arc they appear in is when Twice dies trying to save her again. Dabi’s suicide wish keeps him from getting close to others, and it keeps getting thwarted. Shigaraki’s obsession with destruction and death is clearly not a good thing, and his rejection of his family’s desire for them to join him in death this past arc is growth.

In other words: what Dabi said and what Snatch said about families and how they feel matter for the villains too. The villains are their own weird found family (Dabi as the deadbeat prodigal brother of both his families). Their deaths--Magne’s and Twice’s thus far, and I’m not ruling out further deaths in the future--affect the others. People’s feelings on losing loved ones matter. The villains are people, as Himiko said herself this arc:

Their feelings about each other matter:

How would Touya dying affect the Todorokis? At least they saved him spiritually, I guess, but that’s absolutely lame narratively, and if you have Enji eventually do a sacrifice to save Dabi (pretty likely, even if I personally think Enji will survive said sacrifice) then what’s the point of Dabi dying? How would Himiko dying affect society? As a martyr like Curious wanted her to be, even a redeemed one? A tragic warning story? What even is the point of Ochaco saving her if that’s the case? If Shigaraki dies, well, who would mourn besides Deku? How would Shigaraki dying affect the surviving members of the league? He just couldn’t be saved physically? 

It’s not impossible some of this happens, but it doesn’t seem like great writing, especially with panels like, oh, these that show us BNHA’s perspective on death:

Sacrificing something is a type of death that occurs in stories; this should happen in a redemption arc, which is why I’ve been saying Enji needs to sacrifice his hero reputation to help save Touya and even then it’ll still be Shouto imo who does the saving. But physical death?

If you want further analysis of the latter two panels and how they relate to the ending, see here.

We already have another villain who will definitely die redemptively (Kurogiri--an adult coded character--because he’s already, like, dead), and Spinner and Mr. Compress aren’t coded as kids so I hold them with anxiety towards the end. But again, this isn’t me being ageist or saying this is the way things ought to be in fiction or real life: it’s me looking at writing tropes and saying that child-coded characters tend to survive their redemptions. See: Zuko. Why? Because the death of children or child-coded characters is a tragedy. When a child-coded character dies redemptively it doesn’t feel like a happy ending and if framed as such, it’s often criticized for bad writing (see: Ben Solo). Curious even called this out in her fight with Himiko. I would hope Horikoshi doesn’t end the story being like yeah Curious was right that’s the best use of Himiko’s/Dabi’s/Shigaraki’s arcs:

Additionally, as for the believability of a character getting a new chance after so much destruction and murder... well, it’s kinda a thing in shonen and even in seinen? For better or for worse, it’s a thing. We have Vegeta in Dragon Ball Z and Kaneki Ken in Tokyo Ghoul (Kaneki, by the way, is absolutely an inspiration for Shigaraki). We can debate how well-written these redemptions are (I personally have been quite critical of Kaneki’s despite wanting it to happen narratively), but it can be done. BNHA’s Japan especially isn’t as harsh a world as Tokyo Ghoul’s Japan, so it would make even more sense for something like Kaneki’s ending.

The reality is that the cycle of revenge via hurting people and then leaving hurting families and loved ones has to stop somewhere. Someone has to be the bigger person and step up and be like “naw.” That’s heroic. That’s brave. That’s sacrificial itself. Justice itself doesn’t really exist in its purest form without mercy.

There’s another genre-reason I don’t see death or jail as likely (I could see, like, maybe a mental health ward like Rei’s? But it’s too soon to speculate).

If saving is considered a good thing for the story, if it’s truly the highest ideal, then saving someone should be rewarded by the narrative. The characters who save should have a positive result to show us this a good thing.

This is why it doesn’t work for the heroes’ end journey to be accepting that some people cannot be saved. The notion of just accepting that you cannot do something, you cannot save everyone, you cannot, cannot, cannot, is called out as a flaw of society. Determination, on the other hand, is rewarded.

We see it with Deku as well as with Mirio.

So, what if they save them and the redeemed characters then go on to sacrifice themselves in their redemption and die (come to the same end)? If saving changes absolutely nothing for the saved person, if it’s too late for the saved from themselves to change and/or do anything that matters besides die, then the narrative theme of saving as important is left unemphasized at best and undermined at worst. Simple intrinsic knowledge that the kids “did the right thing” doesn’t cut it for a story with so much focus on physical saving when the kids are already doing the right thing; moral struggles about whether to choose to be good aren’t really Deku, Ochaco, or Shouto’s arcs. It works for Aizawa’s arc with Kurogiri, but not for the kiddos. If BNHA was more of a philosophical/spiritual text, that would indeed make sense, but it is not. Genre-wise, BNHA is a fantastical superhero optimistic story, not a gritty real-world set drama.

#bnha meta #mha meta #bnha 295 #mha 295 #deku #league of villains #shigaraki tomura #shimura tenko #todoroki shouto #todoroki touya #todoroki enji #endeavor #todoroki family #toga himiko #all for one #afo #uraraka ochako #bakugou katsuki #aizawa shouta #bnha theory #mha theory #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #midoriya izuku #kurogiri

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

The fandom seems to think that Demetri's favorite color is blue and if that's true, then it makes me wonder about Hawk's original mohawk? Like what if he chose blue because it was his best friend's favorite color?? And he wanted Demetri to like it?? I literally just thought of this because I'm in the middle of writing a Binary Boyfriends fic and my first instinct was come to your blog klsdfklmdkmld.

wAIT HOLY SHIT I DIDN’T EVEN THINK OF THAT??? BUT YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT???

Demetri DOES legitimately seem to like the color blue--there might not be enough canon basis to say it’s his favorite, but a lot of his flannels and other clothes are either blue or have blue pretty prominently in them!!! It’s partly for the Miyagi-Do imagery, of course, but I think he wore a fair bit of blue even before he joined, so I like to think he just is fond of the color and joining Miyagi-Do just gave him an excuse to wear it more lol. But I really like the idea of Hawk getting a wacky new hairstyle when he Flipped The Script that he legitimately thought Demetri would like and think was cool, in a color he knew Demetri liked, and was just...lowkey kinda crushed when Demetri didn’t really take to it :( In fact, in 1x09, if you watch how Hawk reacts to Demetri being kinda weirded out and dismissive of the whole new “Hawk” persona, it reads a bit like Hawk is disappointed and almost a bit hurt that Demetri isn’t more impressed with his new “coolness” upgrade. Almost like...he was kinda hoping to impress Demetri??? Maybe not on like a conscious level, but he’s certainly seeking Demetri’s approval to some degree and gets annoyed and hurt when he doesn’t get it (i.e. “All right, I see how you’re saying [Hawk], and I don’t like it.”). I also like the idea that maybe Eli chose to dye his hair that color to maybe help Demetri be more comfortable with his change to Hawk--like “alright, I kinda feel like I need to revamp who I am and change how I approach my life to be more secure in myself and feel safer existing in the world, but you’re still an important person to me and this change doesn’t have to be something that’s bad for you.”

AlsO, if you want to take the hair symbolism a step further, it’s interesting to note that Hawk’s hair is blue while he’s still holding on to Demetri to some extent, and also still holding onto the original Eli that Demetri loved and was best friends with. Hawk continues to be friends with Demetri through the end of Season 1 and into the beginning of Season 2, and still shows shades of the old timid, nervous Eli while he has the blue hair. And then as SOON as he gets his hair dyed red and gets the moon tattoo (which we’re led to believe happened VERY close together, since he’s getting his hawk’s hair updated at the same time he gets the moon tattoo), his relationship with Demetri falls apart. So in a way, getting rid of the blue hair kinda symbolizes fully letting Demetri go, with the red hair symbolizing his full commitment to Cobra Kai and the moon tattoo he gets at the same time symbolizing his full commitment to his relationship with Moon (and having to presumably let go of any lingering feelings he might have for Demetri). Lowkey ingenious symbolism but oh BOY does it make me depressed to think about :(

Also, welcome to my blog! I’m flattered I’m the go-to for Binary Boyfriends content these days :’) I’ll do my best to continue delivering!!! Also, all of my headcanons and random plot ideas and whatnot are in fact Free Real Estate, and you can feel free to use anything you like here, friend!!! Wishing you the best of luck in your binary bf fanfic endeavors, and I’d love to read them when they’re done!

#hawk x demetri #demetri x eli #binary boyfriends #hawkmeat #eli x demetri #demetri x hawk #elimetri #demetri cobra kai #eli moskowitz #cobra kai #cobra kai season 1 #cobra kai season 2 #hawk #demetri #eli #my askbox

[guardianspirits13]

Emotional Abuse and Neglect in the Todoroki Family

(Originally this was going to be a very long winded responce to one of @habukomongoose’s posts, but I didn’t want to overshadow syr, so you can find the original post that inspired me here.

Okay, I could rant about this forever, but I don’t think people understand like how difficult and psychologically damaging neclect and emotional abuse can be. Natsuo and Fuyumi had literally no parental guidance from the ages of like 4+.

Fuyumi essentialy gave up her childhood to take care of her siblings and she was as young as 11 when Rei was sent away and she literally took care of the house, cooking, cleaning etc, as well as encouraging her brothers. She had to mature quickly to take on responsibility and so much stress as a literal child.

She heard her brothers and mom being abused from behind closed doors the same as Natsuo did, but she kept a smile on her face and kept fighting for the chance to have a family. Her inner dialogue was probably something along the lines of ‘If I can do more, if I help out, if I’m kind and patient and I’m good then everything will get better.’ I’m extremely familiar with these sort of internal thoughts, taking responsibility for everything that happens and blaming others’ pain on your personal shortcomings.

If she couldn’t bring her family back together, then maybe at the very least she could gain her father’s approval by being the perfect child, right?

Natsuo is a different case. He probably had the closest to a ‘normal’ childhood that any of the siblings got, but in the present he also seems to express the most residual emotional trauma (excluding Dabi, he’s an outlier). Fuyumi did most likely go out of her way to take care of him, up through encouraging him to go to college while she stayed in an....unstable household and continued to try and hold the place together. Natsuo was allowed to play and do essentially whatever he wanted, but he probably knew his parents the least.

He is the only one who explicitly never interacted with Endevaor as a kid, and hardly saw Rei past the age of four. I wouldn’t put him past goning above and beyond to gain any sort of attention, ranging from straight A’s to acting out and getting detention. It’s normal for kids who don’t get enough attention at home to act out, and I headcanon him as the sort of kid that was gifted and didn’t really have to try at school, but also a class clown who got in trouble a lot.

And then there’s his relationship with Touya. Now I’m going to say right off that bat that none of what I’m about to say is Touya’s fault whatsoever, but a MAJOR failing on the part of Endeavor and (to a much lesser extent) Rei. Now that that’s out of the way, Natsuo’s childhood relationship with Touya is clearly the main source of his trauma. Touya vented to him, and explicitly told him everything, from the things that Endeavor did to him to his own self-hatred and borderline suicial tendencies. Now we don’t know how young Natsuo was when this started, but he was nine when Touya ‘died’ and even that is an extremely young age to deal with anything of this nature, let alone from someone at least four years older than him.

So here’s the thing. In most cases, it would definitely be a form of emotional abuse to dump these sort of thoughts/feelings onto a young child, and even to a certain extent for adults as well. But Touya was also a child. He shouldn’t have had to turn to Natsuo to feel heard so again, all of this was very much Endeavor’s fault, from his role in making Touya feel like this in the first place to not meeting basic parental responsibilites. Also saying that, it is evident to me that a lot of Touya’s emotions towards Endeavor rubbed off on Natsuo, beyond just being angry about what Endeavor did to him directly. Natsuo still clearly looked up to Touya and saw him as a role model, as younger kids tend to do, so Touya’s abuse and neglect was just that much more damaging to Natsuo’s development.

Point being, Fuyumi had to mature responsibly to take care of her family, and Natsuo had to mature emotionally to help deal with Touya’s deepest, darkest thoughts and experiences.

This is not to speak of Touya’s ‘death’ and the impact that had on Natsuo specifically, hearing every single thing Touya went through and then losing him so suddenly. I’m not particularly saying that Touya attempted suicide (although the evidence is there), but I am saying Natsuo’s head can’t have been in a good place after hearing Touya wonder why he was even alive and then ‘dying’ soon after. He’s living with years of guilt and Touya’s death definitely weighs on his conscience.

If I’m gonna be even more of a psychology nerd for a moment here, he logically knows that he was just a kid, Touya’s death wasn’t his fault, and if it was anyone’s fault it would be Endeavor’s. Emotionally though, he feels responsible. He knows there’s nothing he could have done but there’s this nagging what if feeling, and he projects those feelings onto Endeavor, so pushing him away makes him feel like he’s doing something. Touya’s not alive to see this new Endeavor, he’ll never have the chance to forgive Endeavor because he’s dead. He hated Endeavor when he was alive too, so as much or as little as Natsuo might want to forgive Endeavor for his own neglect, he can’t forgive Endeavor for Touya’s sake. Once again, Touya is the source of most of his trauma, not Endeavor, however much Natsuo attributes to him. As far as we know Endeavor never did anything actively abusive to Natsuo, but it was passive neglect that broke both him and Touya. It’s sucha an interesting character aspect that I’ve uncovered, and honestly it makes so much more sense. Natsuo’s become a sort of vigilante in his own right, and he’s not going to rest until Touya gets justice or he gets the closure he needs to move on.

And guess what? Both of those things are so close to happening in canon. Yes, I’m a little (a lot) disappointed that it looks like Dabi’s gonna escape and go underground again after all of that drama, bceause I was really hoping for a reunion sooner rather than later. Either way, the Todoroki family is gonna have a lot to work through, even if they aren’t able to make peace with Touya himself. Shouto has undergone layers of new trauma in the past few chapters, and whenever Natsuo and Fuyumi show up he’s gonna have to decide wether he mentions how casually Dabi mentioned his (presumably secretive) reliant relationship with Natsuo, or how nonchalant he was about Natsuo almost dying. Anyways, everyone has a bunch of new trauma and I cannot WAIT to see how that works out for them.

Thank you for reading, and I would love to hear your thoughts if you have any!

#todoroki family #natsuo todoroki #fuyumi todoroki #bnha #todoroki touya #bnha 294 #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #mha #dabi #bnha spoilers #bnha meta #mymeta #mypost #tw abuse #tw neglect #tw suicide

[efrmellifer]

Receptum

5.55, but with more Wymelliferel and Etien's thoughts

Etien stood in the Rising Stones, swaying from foot to foot (a habit she’d picked up in the months she’d been away from Scion duties), the Scions around her—both those new and old, dyed in the wool and relatively new to the movement.

Of their number, she stood closest to Estinien. But of course she did; to have done otherwise would have been the more peculiar choice.

Still, she was attentive as the Scions were invited to another meeting of the Alliance in Ala Mhigo. Not just the Alliance this time, apparently, since they had guests from the beast tribes. All of them. She hummed, only loud enough that Estinien heard it. And maybe Y’shtola, since her ear swiveled back toward Etien.

Ambitious, Etien murmured, not caring who heard her. Estinien chuckled.

She tapped the toes of her boots on the floor while Alphinaud accepted the invitation to the Alliance meeting, still rocking just a little until Estinien caught her by the elbows.

“You’re making me seasick,” he said, voice low so only she could hear him.

The Scions continued talking about who should go, and blah blah Thancred and Y’shtola because summoning,aye, all right.

Then Thancred turned to her. “I think we’ve alldone our part in that endeavor, don’t you, Etien?”

She froze completely, hands coming up to her chest as she nodded, eyebrows pulling together and pitching upward in the middle.

Urianger took the floor from her, stating—rather than asking—in fairly certain terms that he would be staying behind. For the defense, of course.

Then Estinien chimed in. “I’m not coming, either. Aymeric will be there, and I’d rather not be interrogated.”

Etien turned, breaking his hold on her arms easily. “Estinien, he’s just worried about you. We’veseen you more often than anyone else, especially current company, and even we worry.” She let a lock of his hair drift off her curled hand, the way one would release a puff of smoke.

He crossed his arms, obstinate. “Hmph. I will not let you persuade me.”

“Suit yourself, I’m just telling you that Aymeric isn’t trying to pin you down or breathe down your neck. He’s worried about you because he loves you. Because you’re a Scion now, and he knows—” She remembered who she was standing among, and shut her mouth.

Thancred carried on with saying those were staying, stay, and everyone else come along.

“Well, I’ll see you later then,” Etien mumbled, stepping away and towards the door into The Seventh Heaven.

Estinien clicked his tongue as she left, watching the ruffles of her skirt swishing.

“Hath trouble come to Paradise?” Urianger asked, sympathy in his tone and his posture. “Firmly didst thou hold her still, and harshly rebuke her expression of her and Aymeric’s love.”

“You stayed behind,” he replied. “Are you fighting with the other Scions?”

Urianger almost laughed. “Nay, but neither have I taken any for lovers.”

Estinien huffed again. “That is not the problem. They worry about me, I worry about them; their method of worrying is far more doting than mine is. It can be stifling.”

“Ah.” Urianger nodded. “Well, thou wilt see much more of her in the coming days, both as thy paramour and as thy comrade. ‘Twould behoove thee to make thy peace with how she may tend to and treat with thee on and off the battlefield.”

A soft groan from Estinien. “I suppose you have a point.”

***

Again, Etien was sat next to G’raha, but the two of them and Ishgard’s Lord Commander—or was he Lord Speaker for these meetings?—were all sat towards the middle of the table this time.

She sat, looking dazed and happy as he managed to rally the beast tribes, praising them and the component members of the Alliance representation for their strengths, uniting them under their shared purpose. And then, she perked, returning to a more active focus (it was plain in her eyes) as he drew them all metaphorically under the shared banner.

Etien blinked a few times as Aymeric met her eyes.

“I submit that the honor of naming it should go to the Scion whose brave efforts have done so much to unite Eorzea. What say you, my friend?”

She blushed, even inside her ears, then dipped her head to think. “I would call it The Grand Company of Eorzea,” she replied.

Alphinaud turned to her, shocked as he commented, “But that’s the name I…”

She just nodded while the other Alliance members voiced their approval, including the assorted beast tribes. When invited, she joined Alphinaud outside to talk.

Catching the tail end of the conversation, Aymeric sidled up to her before she left to speak with former Crystal Braves.

“It was astoundingly…generous of you to give the new Alliance Alphinaud’s name for it.”

She shrugged. “Well, for one thing, it was better than anything I was going to come up with on the spot, and for another,” she slipped her hand into his for emphasis, “I already got everything I wanted from that time in the Scions’ collective life. I figured I might as well pass it on to Alphinaud, so he could see his dreams come true.”

“You, too, see him as your younger brother then, I take it?”

Etien sighed, her grip loosening, but she didn’t let go of Aymeric’s hand. “Aye, I suppose I do, hmm? He and Alisaie--”

“Closed the gaping wound that came with leaving M’ertle and M’ynstrel,” he finished for her. “I understand. Well, conceptually. Unlike you and Estinien, I never had siblings I lost and found succor in the Leveilleur twins.” He chuckled. “When we say ‘the twins’ now, we shall have to distinguish between whether we meant the Leveilleurs or our own children.”

Etien’s eyes lit with mirth, but she didn’t quite laugh. “You’re right. Though ours look more distinct; only people aware of the details of their birth would know them to be twins.”

“Fraternal twins,” Aymeric pushed gently.

“Well, so are the Leveilleurs, unless there’s something I don’t know. But, it would be their story to tell, and none of my business unless they made it my business.”

“That is enough about the twins for now. Either set.” Aymeric’s voice had sunk closer to a whisper, so Etien looked up at him, listening attentively. “For all my oratory justification, I offered you the chance to name the new alliance so you could choose at least onething on thisgods-awful road you keep getting goaded along.”

“I appreciate the gesture,” she murmured in response, now looking away to hide some of her expression, letting go of his hand so she could fold hers in front of her. “I only regret that I had to do what I did.”

“Had to?”

“I cannot be selfish, or even self-interested. They won’t let me.” She lifted her chin. He knew that motion.

“Please do not cry, my dearest. I could not bear to see it, not after… after everything,” he added, his tone similar in her ear to how it had sounded years ago, when he’d told Estinien that without Alphinaud, Estinien would be dead.

He took her into his arms. “I do not mean… you are free to cry. If not to me, then to whom?” He stroked her hair. “My heart will ache with every tear that falls, but I am your shield, and you are safe with me to express what you must, however you must.”

But she just sniffled. “You’re right. I have to be strong.”

Alphinaud called to her, and she lifted her head from where it rested under Aymeric’s breastbone.

He rested his fingers along her chin, even as she turned her head to look toward the sound of her name. “Go, Etien,” he instructed her softly. “You only need to be strong for a bit longer.”

***

Etien’s mind wandered as she rode her griffin (Nyx was currently resting at the Holy Stables after some medical procedures, well cared for by House Fortemps, as she always had been) through the bluffs of Gyr Abania.

She knew Alphinaud was going to travel the whole way by aether, and he’d be waiting for her, tapping his toe against the stones at Castrum Oriens, but having to slow down a little as he waited for her to fly from Porta Praetoria wasn’t going to kill him. Plus, these griffins were ungodly fast; she was halfway across the Fringes. She was practically there.

She waved, in case anyone in Castellum Velodyna could see her, and held tight for the last few moments of her flight.

She came to a landing by coasting over the top of the castrum’s gates and touching down before she and her mount smacked into the aetheryte, then wandered around looking for Alphinaud, pleasantly surprised by how lively the castrum still was—packages went in and out, training and patrols were still taking place, the whole nine yards.

She tried to pay attention as she asked Riol and Alianne for their thoughts on the Crystal Braves, but as soon as Ilberd came up, her mind began to wander again, wanting to think about anything else.

“One bad apple” made her think of the apples that occasionally grew outside the Gates of Judgment, and then the sweet, crisp apples of Il Mheg. Oh, she missed Feo Ul.The pixie had made their way through Ishgard and tapped on the window of the house soon after the kits were born, eager to see the less-than-literal fruits of their sapling.

They’d tipped their head this way and that and cooed about how cute the twins were, assessing them as they admired. According to them, Landric looked like he would have an affinity for magic, and they traced the curve of Betula’s cheek, then laid their hand upon it the way they did to Etien so often. “A hardy shrub of a girl you have here. A pretty, sturdy little Lacecap.”

They fluttered away from the cradles then, sitting on Etien’s shoulder. “I expect the others will be envious that I have a new set of twins to play with, when these two get bigger. Everyone in Il Mheg misses Alisaie and Alphinaud.”

“Aww,” Etien murmured. “I wish the rift weren’t quite so much of a yawning chasm,” she added, “so they could all come with you.”

“But they can all enjoy it by proxy with their king’s stories. And I imagine they may be itching for one now.” They took off from their seated position, wings flapping hard at first, but slowing as they evened out in the air (and didn’t have to worry about taking Etien’s hair with them). “Take care, Etien, until my next visit.”

She nodded, with a cheery “you too!” and waving as they made their usual wide loop and disappeared back home.

Etien snapped from her reverie when Riol’s voice grew more boisterous, laughing about how glory hunters were stopped before they could start in the Crystal Braves.

She blinked into the dappled sunshine, remembering she was technically on the job, and shook her head to clear it, ears bouncing. “Where to now?” she asked Alphinaud.

He ushered her towards Gridania with diplomatic concessions that they’d take up enough of Riol and Alianne’s time, and that the testimonies that Alisaie and G’raha had gathered were waiting for them. This time, she relented in the name of promptness and traveled to the woodland city on the currents of aether.

And it was just as well, because she would have been disappointed to dismount at the gate to the city only to have to recall her mount to ride to Little Solace. But she arrived in the East Shroud and paid her toll to the aetheryte tender, and walked the relatively short distance between the Hawthorne Hut and the home of the Sylphs.

Even Frixio acknowledged that they had just seen each other at the Alliance meeting, but Etien wasn’t completely humorless about the to-do list she’d been tackling since then, offering the customary dance of greeting with a little smile on her lips. Hells, she was almost disappointed Frixio said no.

But there were bigger fish to fry, like the abducted Sylphs to worry about, and—her ears swiveled backwards before anyone’s attention (other than G’raha’s, she figured) had been drawn to the rapid footsteps behind her.

Well, she supposed they had the Sharlayan envoy to worry about, too, now. As she watched Alphinaud and Alisaie converse about the envoy’s identity, her lips parted in surprise. Not just any representative of Sharlayan, then. Their father.

She swallowed, already imagining the worst possibilities that an unexpected visit could portend. Well, in some ways, this wasn’t unexpected, was it? And yet, her chest was getting tight with the dread.

She took a deep breath. This wasn’t even herfather, so she had no reason to be so negative and scared. It was going to be fine.

And so they all set off. As Etien thumbed out the right number of gil to the tenders, she sighed. It certainly would have cost lessfor her to ride from Gridania when she’d left, if she’d known she was going to be coming right back, with a shorter time limit this go around. Still, as she arrived at Nophica’s Altar and entered the Lotus Stand, admiring its beauty once again, she found it a little difficult to be upset about the monetary cost.

Not when she and the others were commended for their swift attendance, and certainly not when she had a bad feeling about this, this little meeting that still loomed in front of them. She’d have paid a much steeper price to have this feeling go away. It only grew as his boots sounded on the dirt path leading to where they all stood waiting.

She smiled as Fourchenault said that the twins’ mother would be pleased to hear of their condition and was well herself, glad that Alisaie and Alphinaud didn’t have one morething to worry about.

But it was after the pleasantries—including gratitude exchanged for all that Louisoix had done for Eorzea and received in hospitality from Eorzea—that the foul mood that Etien had already sensed came to the forefront, casting its shadow over the conversation.

As the twins made their arguments, Etien tried to remind Fourchenault of the axiom she was sure he’d heard, and that she’d had to fall back on before, but never to a Leveilleur: “To ignore the plight of those one might conceivably save is not wisdom—it is indolence.”

The way he turned it onto Alphinaud and Alisaie felt like a slap, and she hissed, ready to argue.

The confidence with which he disowned them after silenced her immediately. The breaking of their voices as Alisaie moved to follow her progenitor, and Alphinaud told her to give it up, those set Etien’s eyes to welling.

They were so resigned… Had she looked so incredibly smalland alone when she’d set off on that forest path, effectively made orphan by breaking from her family, the way they had just been severed from theirs?

She answered her linkpearl, sighing her way through the conversation with Krile so she didn’t start crying for her surrogate siblings.

As they left the Lotus Stand, she took Alisaie’s free hand, the one that wasn’t folded into Alphinaud’s. “Well… you could always be wards of House Fortemps again. Or take up temporary residence with me, as I imagine Toto will be filling out the paperwork to have you as Aldynns the second she hears this wretched news.”

Alisaie squeezed Etien’s hand, and Alphinaud just looked back at her mournfully.

***

Etien had never been close with Arenvald—it was like that with many of the bearers of the Echo, she’d noticed; Etien could be friendly with them and sympathize with the struggle they shared, but something she couldn’t name stopped her from ever really opening up to them. She had never been close with Arenvald, but she could see just how hard the news of his permanent injury was hitting Alphinaud.

How many more things was he going to lose in this single swoop?

Her heart went out to him, but some vein of bitterness in her started to bleed when Alphinaud lamented that now he knew how heavy the burdens of other people’s dream were.

Nowhe knew.

And he wondered if he’d made the right choice. The slow bleed was a trickle now. Yes, well, it had been a choice for him, hadn’t it?He’d chosen to leave the rest of the Sharlayans and come to Eorzea, to squabble with Alisaie about what their grandfather had wanted and intended.

He’d chosen to… she’d chosen to leave home, too. But he didn’t have the weight of the very star’s conscription on his back with all those dreams.

Hydaelyn had roped her like a lost calf, then Lyse and Papalymo had slipped the hobble on.

The oxbow pinched and the yoke was heavy, but someone had to help Alphinaud carry the dreams he’d been entrusted. They’d come this far together, and he’d said to the Chais, they prevailed together or not at all.

And so they would do on the battlefield. She took his hand for help up onto the airship headed for Carteneau, and off they went.

***

He knew it was dangerous, when the fray pressed in around him on all sides, but Aymeric scanned the battlefield, his gaze settling on Lunar Ifrit, bold as brass and starkly purple where he wasn’t dark as the sky above them.

And zipping around the primal’s feet were streaks of blue and bronze, and dark, night-sky blue and silver.

He could almost hear them, so familiar was he with the way they fought, the sounds they would have made. Etien coming down onto her feet from a perfectly-aimed shot with a low grunt, a growl as Estinien drove his lance forward.

Aymeric couldn’t go to them, not when he was leading this squadron. But, he could do this.

“I need a contingent to break away and support the trio fighting Ifrit. Keep their Academician on his feet so he can take care of the others.”

An Adder and two Temple Knights ran from the Telotek they had been fighting, and Aymeric tried to watch out of the corner of his eye as they approached Ifrit.

Satisfied with their progress across the field, he focused once more on giving his all to subdue the Gnath before him so a porxie could set the poor thing right again.Maybe the Scions wouldn’t let Etien be selfish, but they would never be able to stop him from acting in her best interest.

And he watched her even as Estinien left her side, joining the Scions. Her face was tipped up to the sky as the purple-robed Ascian talked to her.

Whatever he said, it made her eyes narrow, her lips pursing before she bared her teeth. By the time she’d gotten control of her expression again, the Ascian was gone.

Etien looked out over the battlefield, her eyes drawn to a Durendaire shield, drawn to Ala Mhigan soldiers running across the dirt with urgency, but running to instead of from.

And then, she saw Alphinaud, struggling in his work on one of the fallen. When all he got was a death rattle of “Glory be to Garlemald,” he gave up, pounding the earth. So they regrouped with Alisaie, and approached the others.

Aymeric was standing with Hien when the metaphorical dust settled, which surprised Etien little, considering their positions as the heads of the most recent additions to the Alliance (save Ala Mhigo and now the other Allied populations of Eorzea), but it did still warm her heart to see the both of them doing all right after so hard a struggle.

And it had been. It was an overall success, yes, but plenty had been lost in the process. Prefaced by a sigh, she encouraged and agreed with Alisaie and Alphinaud, “one battle at a time, we’ll get there.”

She rubbed at her forehead, feeling a headache brewing and hoping it wasn’t Echo-related. But she dropped her hand as the sky cleared, giving them all clear view of the moon.

It was a lot like hope, wasn’t it? Sometimes it wasn’t evident—in the sky or in the hearts of the people—but it hadn’t gone away. A new phase would come and it would be seen again.

Still, seeing the signal they’d come to recognize, both Aymeric and Estinien came to Etien’s side, ready to help her however she needed to get her home in one piece. Well, “home” was to the Rising Stones; it had been made clear by the way the Scions were talking that they were going to be reconvening there, and all of them had better be there.

Estinien grumbled, but joined everyone on the Ishgardian airship, sticking close to Etien and Aymeric at the side of the ship, massaging Etien’s hand to alleviate her headache, and her wrist to soothe any nausea the flying might cause when she was already in some pain.

She leaned against the wall as the Scions talked about what came next and what they wished they could have done, most of her pain relieved now, but still so tired.

She regretted now saying that the road went ever onward, all that time ago. Had she known she was damning herself, she would have kept her mouth shut.

As the Scions dispersed, Estinien came to her side again.

“A place to settle down. Here? Hmph.” He crossed his arms, leaning next to Etien against the cool stone. “What does he think he’s talking about?”

She shrugged, smiling but looking a little helpless for an answer.

“We have ourselves quite the man.” He shook his head.

At this, Etien vigorously nodded.

“Come on, then,” he reached out to take her hand. “We had best get home to him before he starts worrying.”

As they clasped hands, her bare fingers (fingerless gloves after all) curling onto the metal of Estinien’s gauntlets, she sighed again.

“Surely it cannot be so bad to hold my hand,” he remarked over his shoulder as they walked through the Seventh Heaven.

“No. It isn’t. That one was relieved, actually.”

“Relieved?”

“I’ll be happy to have you home, Estinien.”

“I imagine Aymeric will be, too.” He tried to hide it, with snark, with his hair, but he did smile.

Etien trotted after him, telling tales of the critters here catching her off-guard, but she was trying to hide her excitement in bubbly stories.

The road may still be going on, but she was going to take this detour. She was going back home.

#fic #wyrmelliferel #this is a big one #it's almost 4k #5.55 spoilers

[natsubeatsrock]

Should our heroes do wrong?

Yes. Next question.

Why?

I kind of got into this with the talk of forgiveness, but this is definitely worth talking about. If we get through this the right way, we'll get to talk about redemption arcs. And, boy do I have things to say about that.

But first, let's talk about why heroes ought to do things that aren't particularly great. If you want to make a character more realistic, it's worth recognizing that there has to be a level of weakness to them. Obviously not so much that they're useless or evil. However, enough to let us know that they're not literally perfect.

After all, not a single one of us is perfect. We all have our different struggles, vices, and bad tendencies. As much as we look to characters as escapes from reality, it's rare that a character is considered great because they are perfect. Often, people like characters because they have the same quirks as them and sympathize with the imperfections in them, defending their perceived perfection from critics.

What happens when you get a character that literally is incapable of doing wrong or showing weakness?

In common parlance, a Mary Sue. To be clear, I recognize that there is a lot of sexism behind the use and misuse of the term. However, I don't think the term is useless. The best definition of Mary Sue comes from Overly Sarcastic Productions (whose analysis I love, outside of the conclusions on Fairy Tail as a five-man band). According to them, a Mary Sue is a force of the universe the series revolves around. The rules of the series bend to their whims in ways that other characters could only hope. In short, they're more of a force of nature than a real character. 

To be fair, being imperfect isn't that bad. There are usually three ways to play imperfections off.

The first is the most obvious, playing it straight. A character's faults are known and matter, but that's about it. The issues last a couple of story arcs, but they're far from the main focus of a series or character arc. It's kind of hard to describe this beyond that. As we'll get to other types it should make sense of what I mean.

The second is when the problems with a character drive the plot of the series. This is when a story is built around a character's issues and navigating their daily actions in them. The show isn't about them overcoming the issue so much as it is them living with their issue.

A recent example of this is Bofuri. If you're unaware of the longer title of the show, the main character of the show decides to play as a shield-type character in an MMO. But, because she's an airhead, she decides to put all of her points into her defense stat so she "won't get hurt". The rest of the show follows her as she bobbles her way into the bulkiest tank build in the game with insanely broken abilities. The show isn't about her becoming less of an airhead and growing, so much as it is her thriving as a powerful player despite being an airhead.

The most important thing about this type of character is that it makes sense that they're able to function despite whatever issue they have. Like, if a person's issue is that they can't go without killing people, they probably shouldn't be a doctor. Though in Bungo Stray Dogs, one character can only cure people on the brink of death, no matter their actual issue. Regardless of how minor a person's injuries are, she has to bring them to the point of almost dying to fully heal them. However, she works as a doctor for a group of special agents and not a general hospital. At one point, she heals characters threatened by death in one of the coolest moments in the series.

The third is when problems with a character change as the story continues. This is where we delve into the reasons why a character is how they are and why they have to change. Their reasons for change can be love, growth, or just the personal decision to be better. The point is that they become less terrible people as the story continues.

How this plays out depends on what the issue is. In Your Lie in April, the main character's issue is his inability to play the piano again. As the story goes through, he becomes more and more able to play the piano. In Oregairu, the main character is a misanthropic jerk. As the series progresses, he comes to open up to people more and stop relying on himself. (AND IT”S BA-)

However, the most well-known way this plays out is a character making a mistake and has to atone for it. Normally, this just means a character makes a mistake throughout the story and has to make up for it. The character is forgiven and the story continues.

But some characters have arcs built around making up for the things they did. And, thus we get to redemption arcs. A lot of people have opinions on redemption arcs and how they ought to be handled. My own view is that a good redemption arc needs two components: a recognition of that a character messed up and clear signs of positive change. No good character redemption has neither of these and the reason so many sours for people is because they lack one or both elements and skip straight to the character "being better".

I think the coolest example of character redemption, as hinted in my talk about forgiveness, is Paul from the Bible. (Who'd you think I'd say?) We first hear of him under a different name approving the most famous martyrdom of Acts. When we next hear about him, he's killing Christians left and right. But after a literal divine encounter, he recognizes that what he did was wrong. He doesn't just stop killing Christians. He's attributed to writing more books of the Bible than anyone else. (I have to remind myself that people don't believe the Bible to be divinely inspired.)

I will make one word of caution. I don't think that a character can't be redeemed of even the harshest sins a person can commit. However, it's worth recognizing that good redemption isn't as glamourous as it's often made to seem. People will often take that to mean that redemption arcs ought to be painful for the person going through them. There’s an element in which breaking the bad habits and patterns one is accustomed to isn’t easy, but that’s not all I think it should mean.

It does mean the world doesn't open itself back open to released convicts. For many of them, their lives ended the instant they went back to jail, regardless of whether or not they leave better people. Even if they’re able to function in society again, it’s not going to be the same as before they committed their crime and before they were in jail.

To harken back to Endeavor, I doubt his family will ever fully forgive him for everything that he's done to them. They'll likely never be able to be a "normal family" because of how he's treated each of the members of his family. At the same time, I firmly believe he still should become a better person. That world needs as many good heroes as it can get.

To be continued...

#not fairy tail month: crisis on infinite fandoms #our heroes #this is almost the newest one #the last one is just barely newer #tomorrow's isn't done yet #nor the one for the day after that

[tbehartoo]

All I Want for Christmas is You(r Last Name)

<Part 2     Part 4> [coming soonish]

On AO3

Part 3- Do You Hear What I Hear? Marinette was used to the smell of sweet things coming out of an oven, she lived over the best bakery in Paris after all, but it was unusual at this time of day. Most of the baking started early in the morning and was done well before the lunch rush, so she wasn’t prepared to meet the scent of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies as she and Alya walked through the door after returning from school.

“That’s enough, Adrien,” Tom’s voice could be heard coming from the kitchen. “If you add too many almonds with the chocolate chips that are already in there, they won’t have enough dough to keep the cookies together.”

“But Mari loves slivered almonds in her chocolate chip cookies,” Adrien replied.

There was a silence then, “That’s true,” he said. “Add another handful.”

“We’re home!” Alya called.

“We’re in the kitchen,” Marinette’s father called back.

Alya and Marinette put down their bags and joined the others in the kitchen. Nino was taking cookies from the oven while Tom and Adrien were scooping little mounds of dough onto a baking sheet.

“Anything we can do to help?” Marinette asked.

“No, you two shoo!” Tom said as he waved them away. “This is my kitchen right now and I am trying to teach these two young fellows how to take care of their ladies.”

“Papa…” Marinette began.

Tom put down the scoop he was using and clapped his hands together. “Gentleman attend,” calling for the attention of the boys which he immediately received. “The female of the species,” he made a motion in the direction of the girls, “is often trained to be a caretaker, a helper, a constant worker, in short she is the worrier of the group. This means that when presented with an opportunity to rest, she will immediately try to fill that with some other thing that she thinks needs to be done. After a long day of work, or having just finished a difficult semester of school, for example,” he smiled over at Alya and Mari, “they will not do what we males often do which is slack off and turn into mindless zombies. Oh no, they will continue to work themselves to DEATH!” He waited as the boys murmured worriedly. “When you see the ladies in your life need to take a rest,” he continued, “sometimes you must make them do it! This means you must always be aware of what’s happening in their life and be thoughtful about how that is affecting them. Then you must think to yourself,” he made a motion of deep thought, “how am I to get this person I love taken care of? Then you must do what you think is best whether that means taking over the house while you put them to bed or giving them a hug and a listening ear, you must try to do your best to balance the situation.” He smiled slyly. “Here we have two such ladies that we all know and love. Can either of you name something that can be done to help them rest and refresh after they’ve been through their trying ordeal?”

Both boys raised their hands.

“Yes, uhhh,” he looked around the room as if he were a professor in front of a lecture hall full of students, “Adrien, would you like to share your idea?” Tom asked.

“They have been out in the cold so they probably need a warm drink.”

“Excellent idea,” Tom said happily. “And what would the ladies like to drink?”

“Um, well, Alya usually likes a nice cup of mocha and Mari often prefers black tea with a little lemon, but um…” he hesitated.

“Yes?” Tom urged.

“Shouldn’t we ask them what they’d want?” he said tentatively.

“Yes!” Tom shouted and gave Adrien a high-five. “Always ask! Never presume to know what your ladies think or want.”

“Now Nino, what was your idea of how to get our ladies taken care of?” he said turning to Nino.

“Well, as Adrien said they’ve been walking out in the cold, so maybe they need to sit down and put their feet up?” He pulled Tom’s thinking pose. “Maybe they’d appreciate a blanket to warm up with as well?”

“Another excellent idea,” Tom gave Nino a high-five of approval. “Well gentlemen?” He looked down at them, “What are you waiting for?”

The boys immediately sprang into action. They ushered the girls to the couch while asking them if they’d like something warm to drink and what that should be. Then they proceeded to bring out blankets to tuck around cold legs.

“Alya do you have a hole in your boots?” Nino asked as he stuffed a bit of blanket around her feet. “One of your socks is wet.”

Alya nodded. “They’re my favorite boots and I keep forgetting to get them fixed.”

“Can she borrow a pair of your socks Mar?” Nino asked the other occupant of the couch.

“Sure,” Marinette said. “I’ll go get her some.”

“Uh-uh,” Adrien said. “You stay there Mari. I know where your socks are. Is there a certain pair she should or shouldn’t have?”

Marinette shook her head. “She can have any of them. She’s borrowed all of them often enough.” She smiled at her friend who stuck out her tongue. “Just be sure to knock before you open the door.”

Adrien smiled at her. “Of course, I know I have to give your “ghoul in the attic” time to hide before going in.” He hurried off to get the socks.

Nino returned to the kitchen to get hot cocoa started for both girls and Tom promised to show him how to make whipped cream roses for the top.

“I brought you the fuzzy orange ones Al,” Adrien said as he came back into the room. “Do you want me to put them on you or would you prefer to do it yourself?”

“As much as I love you and Nino waiting on us quite literally hand and foot, I think I’d like to put on my own socks, thank you Monsieur Agreste.” She laughed as Adrien tossed the bundle at her.

“If you give me your socks I can put them up to dry,” he volunteered.

“Thanks Adrien,” she said as she handed the damp sock and its mate to him.

“No problem Al.” He smiled at her before turning away.

He disappeared to another room while Nino returned carrying mugs with huge whipped cream roses floating on top. Adrien brought them a plate with cookies on it and both boys scurried back to the kitchen.

Marinette turned on a movie and as they rested against one another they listened to Tom giving out the last of his advice.

“Very good gentlemen, very good,” he began, “you can see the tension leaving the shoulders and see those smiles? You have done the first part of the maneuver with great precision and efficiency. That is excellent.” He paused and the girls suspected he was giving them hugs. “Now we move on to part two! You see that in our endeavors to pamper our lovelies we have created something of a mess in here? What kind of loving man would show his lady that he cares by leaving her more work to do later?” There was a long silence. When he began speaking again there wasn't the jolly tone in his voice and he lost the playful air of a snooty professor. He was somehow more somber, more serious. “I give you the benefit of my experience boys, may you never have the person you love break into tears because the very thing you've done to show them you care has left them feeling more a slave to your slovenliness than the light of your life.” A breath later he continued, “Nothing can make you feel like less of a man than to crush the spirit of that person you were trying to build up. So, to avoid my pain, I advise you gentlemen to always go the distance and see a project all the way to the end.”

Soon the sounds of washing dishes and cleaning up could be heard. Just as the movement was dying down a beep rang out.

“Perfect timing,” Tom said. “Now you boys go take your drinks and these cookies and I’ll finish up in here.”

“But Tom,” Adrien protested, “You just said we should go the distance and see a project all the way to the end.”

“Yeah,” Nino added, “What kind of men would we be if we left you with work to do while we go play?”

Tom’s laugh erupted unexpectedly. “You both make very good points. I’m so proud to have such quick and attentive students.” Another silence where he was undoubtedly squeezing the air from both boys’ lungs and then, “Very well, let’s get this done so you can go play.”

After a few more minutes Nino was bringing in his own mug and a plate of cookies to sit next to Alya. She had been leaning her back against Marinette, who had been gently running a hand through her hair as they watched the show, her legs stretched out across the seat. Without saying a word he set the mug and plate down on the coffee table, scooped up her legs with the blanket still tucked underneath, sat on the cushion, and draped Alya’s legs across his lap. Then he reached across her legs and picked up the plate.

“Want another cookie?” he asked her as he extended it toward her.

Alya shook her head. “No thanks, Nono,” she said using the nickname his sister had bequeathed on him when she was only two, “I’m already slipping into a carb coma from the three I inhaled earlier.”

***“Okay,” Nino said as he picked up two of the cookies. “Did you want one, Mari?” he asked as he moved the plate in her direction, but she just shook her head so he placed the plate on the coffee table and started to snuggle down with Alya. “If you want some with almonds, Adrien’s waiting for them to cool a bit more and then he’ll be bringing them in.”

“Oh, okay,” Marinette said quietly as she looked away from him.

That was not the reaction he had been expecting. He knew as well as Adrien that those were her favorite cookies and he knew that Adrien was just about her favorite person in the world, so why did she look like she’d just been told her hamster had died?  He sent Alya a text.

Adrien came in with his cocoa and the plate of still warm cookies. He looked at Alya and Nino obviously texting each other, and smiled to see them so comfortable together. He offered Marinette a cookie before sitting next to her. He was close enough for her to feel the warmth radiating from him, but as always he maintained a little distance waiting for her to invite him closer.

“What!” Nino suddenly exclaimed.

Everyone looked at him. He cleared his throat. “Um, I’m sitting right here Alya,” he said nervously, “if you wanted another cookie you could have just said it.”

Alya had been watching him closely. “I’m, uh, being lazy right now Nono. Just hand over the cookie and no one gets hurt.”

Nino reached over and picked up a cookie. The look he gave her as he handed it over was not the hormone fueled gaze he usually wore when they were communicating “telepathically” but it was no less intense.   

“Uh, thanks Nino,” Alya said slightly confused. She started nibbling on the treat and waited for the others to resume watching the show before she continued their texting conversation.

“WHAT?!?!” This time it was Alya that all eyes were staring at. “You can’t send that to a person without a some kind of warning Lahiff!”

“Sorry Al,” Nino said, but the grin on his face suggested it was a lie.

“What did he send you?” Marinette asked trying to peek over her shoulder.

Alya clutched the phone to her chest. “I’m not showing you!” she declared. “You are too good and pure for this world.” She glared daggers at her boyfriend who was having trouble containing his laughter.

“See how you like this,” she said as she started to text back.

She looked up waiting for his response. His face was a scowl as he read but soon his fingers were flying over his phone. A smile broke out on his face when her phone buzzed.

Alya read her message and then said aloud, “You had better be right.”

“Aw, Allie have I ever let you down?”

She smiled back at him. “Never,” a mischievous grin took over and she added, “at least not when it counts.”

“Thanks babe,” he said with a blank face then rolled his eyes. He went back to typing while the others watched their show.

Adrien felt his phone vibrate and checked the notice. He looked up from the phone to meet Nino’s gaze. He nodded and then said, “Uh, Nathalie wants me to call her. I'll just take this in another room.”

Marinette noticed that Nino was still texting, but Alya didn't seem to be responding very often. She was a little worried that they were fighting, but after a careful look at their faces she decided that they were fine. She leaned back against Alya and rested her head on her shoulder. It was so hard to be near Adrien today. Knowing that he hated the thought of them together so much, she was a little surprised that he chose to sit so close to her. No, those kind of thoughts had to stop. Every brush of his sleeve or touch of his leg against hers couldn’t be savored like they were her precious jewels. She just had to get it through her head that she was no more important to Adrien than Nino or Alya, not that he didn’t love and care for them, but he wasn’t in love with any of them. And that just had to be okay. What kind of a friend was she if she couldn’t accept him as he was? You can’t make people feel what they don’t feel! Marinette continued to lecture herself about giving up those hopes and expectations while Adrien was out of the room.

He returned and sat very close to Marinette. “Sorry about that,” he said very quietly in her ear.

Marinette just nodded as she looked straight forward.

“Nathalie wanted to remind us about the charity Christmas Gala tomorrow night.”

Marinette’s gaze dropped to her hands in her lap. “Oh yeah, I forgot about that.”

“She wanted me to tell you that Gorilla will be dropping off your dress by five. Is that okay?”

Marinette nodded. It was the first time that Adrien’s father had insisted on designing a dress specifically for her. He had started supplying gowns for her once Adrien had made it obvious that he wasn’t asking anyone else to these things, saying that as a representative of the Agreste empire she needed to be suitably attired, but this was the first evening dress he had designed just for her. She almost wanted to cry. She’d been so excited when Adrien told her the news, wondering what THE Gabriel Agreste would make for her, but now?

“You know, they’re having the lighting ceremony for the displays in the park tonight,” Adrien said a little louder so that Alya wouldn’t have to strain to overhear what was being said, “I think we should go.”

Marinette turned to look at him in confusion. “You want to go back?”

Adrien nodded as he smiled at her. “I’ve got to find Nath to tell him how much I loved his work.”

Marinette was even more confused than ever. “You, you did?”

Adrien was nodding even more vigorously. “It was absolutely stunning! I couldn’t take my eyes off of it,” he blushed a little when he added, “well off of you.”

“Really?”

He laughed. “Mari it was quite literally breathtaking.” He reached out and took one of her hands. “You were breathtaking,” he whispered.

Marinette’s own breath caught at the look in his eyes.

“We ought to go back so I can see the rest of Nath’s work,” Adrien said as his thumb began to caress the back of Marinette’s hand.

“What do you mean see the rest of it?” Marinette’s head felt like it was spinning faster than when the cyclone akuma had caught her off guard and hit her with one of his twirling storms. She was trying to keep up with everything that was happening but she was simply overwhelmed. What she thought she knew wasn’t true? Maybe he didn’t hate her after all?

“I’m afraid all I saw was you,” Adrien said tenderly, “and I couldn’t bear to stop looking at your face to see anything else.”

“oh...”  

“Would you, would you like to go with me to the park tonight?”

“That would nice,” Marinette said with a smile. “I’d love to go with you.” She turned a little to nudge Alya. “You’re coming, too right?”

Alya didn’t even pretend not to have been listening in. “Gee, I don’t know Mar-Bar. I might want to spend some time with just me and Nino tonight.”

“Okay, I guess I can call Rose and Alix to see if they can come,” Marinette said.

“Why don’t you two just go?” Nino asked frustrated that this was getting off track, again.

“Nino I can’t just go with Adrien alone,” Marinette said with a frown. “That breaks Rule #9.”

They all groaned. When Adrien started taking Marinette to functions, Gabriel had set forth ten rules for their behavior in public to prevent the tabloids from being able to manufacture any kind of false relationship. Rule #9 was that they had to go out in a group, or at least with both Alya and Nino, at all times.

Alya relented. “Okay Mari, we’ll come with you.”

Marinette reluctantly took her hand out of Adrien’s grasp to give Alya a hug. “Thanks Al.”

“But don’t be surprised when Alya and I sneak off,” Nino said with a smirk. “There are just some things we don’t share with you two.”

“And I thank you for that,” Marinette said flatly. She turned back to Adrien. “It looks like I will be able to go to park with you tonight.”

Adrien beamed at her. “That’s great!” He dropped his gaze briefly to her lips before looking up into her eyes again. “And um, afterward, would you like to get something to eat?”

Marinette bit her lower lip as she thought. She didn’t miss the way Adrien’s eyes flitted down to follow the movement. “Well, if these two ditch us...”

“Oh we are so ditching you!”

“Then I guess we’d have to get take out and bring it back here?” she said as if Alya hadn’t openly declared her intention of leaving the two of them alone.

Adrien nodded. “There’s that Mediterranean place next to the park that we like. We can order enough for four people and share with your parents.”

Marinette smiled, “It’s a date!”

At hearing her words, her face started to get that familiar “I can’t believe I just said that in front of Adrien!” look but before she could stammer out an apology or try to retract her words, he gave her a gentle smile. “It’s a date,” he repeated.

Marinette wasn’t sure if the high pitched squealing was coming from her or Alya, and frankly didn’t care. She was going on a date with Adrien!

“Dudes, finally!” Nino said as Alya was excitedly whacking at his nearest arm.

They all shared a laugh and then settled down to wait out the hours until the lighting ceremony.

Instead of leaning against Alya, Marinette relaxed onto Adrien. After a moment, Adrien moved that arm over her head and rested it across her shoulders.

“Is this okay?” he asked tentatively.

Marinette smiled up at him as she nodded. Then proceeded to cuddle into his side. Adrien reached across his body to guide her arm to rest across his stomach. As he covered her arm with his, Marinette couldn’t help but feel content within the circle of his arms. Funny, she had thought that she’d be too excited to sit still if something like this ever happened, but instead she felt as if she was finally coming home.

#mlsecretsanta 2k17 #@jazztastic-panda #miraculous ladybug #adrienette #my writing #AIWFCIYLN #All I Want for Christmas is You(r Last Name) #Maybe next time I will be able to find this freaking tag? #I'm not betting on it