#i am doing! everything the tutorials say! i have been fucking with the same damn thing for two hours!

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

what do you MEAN the audio plugin doesn't work

#Are You Kidding Me? #Look Me In The Eyes And Tell Me You're Joking. #I'm Going To Eviscerate Something. #every single audio separation tutorial: here's an easy free plugin! its so simple! #obs: *spits* fuck you #WHAT DO YOU MEAAAANNNNN #i tried the latest version. i tried the Last version #IT DOESNT WORK??? Hello???? #i am doing! everything the tutorials say! i have been fucking with the same damn thing for two hours! #I Am Still Managing To Fail Spectacularly! What Am I Doing Wrong! Why Is It Broken! #the reviews are saying that it broke with the latest update which is Just My Luck to be honest #absolutely unprompted #bad news gamers! bring your own music to streams. my god. fuck #i thought. i would be able to provide this very shrimple thing. it has krilled me instead #there is no kelp for me. im beached. theres no porpoise in pursuing this further #wailing and wailing and wailing and wailing #ive tried so many different things to no avail #its just!!!! nothing works!!! im scared of breaking what's working!!! #im sorry i have failed you all. cast me into the sea

[yellowocaballero]

Been a fan of your fics for YEARS. I was just telling my friend how despite how much I read fics I never actually love them, with some of your fics (especially TMA) as the exception. Felt the need to reread some of them and saw you reblogged some ISAT fanart. So. Any thoughts on ISAT you'd like to share?

Hope you have a wonderful day!! So happy I found your fics again!!

I avoided answering this for a while because I was trying to think of a way to cohesively and coherently vocalize my thoughts on In Stars and Time. I have given up because I don't want to hold everybody here all day and I have accepted that my thoughts are just pterodactyl screeching.

I love it so much. I have so much to say on it. It drove me bonkers for like a week straight. I have AUs. It's absolute Megbait. They're just a little Snufkin and they're having the worst experience of anybody's life. Ludonarratives my fucking beloved.

I am going to talk about the prologue.

The prologue is such a fascinating experience. You crack open the game and immediately begin checking off all of the little genre boxes: mage, warrior, researcher, you're the rogue...some little kid who's there for some reason...alright, you know the score. You're in yet another indie Earthbound RPG, these are your generic characters, let's get the ball rolling.

Except then you realize that these characters are people. You feel instantly how you've entered the game at its last dungeon, at the end of the adventure. They have their own in-jokes, histories, backgrounds, adventures. They get along well and they're obviously close, but not in a twee or unrealistic way. They have so much chemistry and spirit and life. I fell in love with them so quickly.

But Sif doesn't. Sif kind of hates them, because they will not stop saying the same damn thing. They walk the same paths, do the same things, make the same jokes, expect Sif to say the same lines. They keep referencing a Sif we do not see, with jokes we never see him make and heroic personality he never shows - they reference a Sif who is dead - and Sif can't handle that, so he kills them too.

They become only an exercise in tedious frustration. Sif button mashes through their dialogue, Sif mindlessly clicks the same dialogue options, Sif skips through the tutorial, Sif blows through the puzzles. Sif turns their world into a video game. Sif is playing a generic RPG. Sif forgets their names. They are no longer people with in-jokes, histories, backgrounds, adventures. They're the mage, the warrior, the researcher, and...some random kid.

I did not understand the Kid's presence at first. I had no idea what they contributed to the game. They didn't do anything. As a party member in a video game, they're a bit useless. Why is the Kid there?

Because Sif's life isn't a video game. Because the kid isn't 'the kid'. They're Bonnie. Bonnie, who the party loves. Why is Bonnie there? Because they love them. There is no room for Bonnie in the boring RPG that Sif is playing. And then you realize that Sif is wrong, and that they've lost something extremely important, and that they'll never escape without it.

Watching the prologue before watching ISAT gave ISAT the most unique air of dread and horror, because you crack open ISAT and you see the person Sif used to be. You realize that Sif used to be a person. Sif used to be the person who made jokes, who gave real smiles, who interacted with the world as if they are a part of it. And you know you are sitting down to watch Sif lose everything that made them a person, to lose everything that made them a member of this world, and turn them into a character in a video game who doesn't understand the point of Bonnie at all.

At the climax of the game, when the others realize that something is deeply wrong and that Sif physically cannot tell them, they realize that there is nothing they can do. So Bonnie declares snacktime. And for the first time they have snacktime.

What is snacktime? Classic JRPGs don't have snacktime. There's literally no point to a snacktime - not in a video game, and not in Sif's terrible life. It's not fixing this, because nothing can fix this. But Bonnie gives Sif a cookie and Sif eats it.

It's meaningless. It's a cutscene. It didn't save Sif and it didn't change a thing. It will make no difference in the end.

But it did make the difference. It made all of the difference in the world. Bonnie is a character who you really don't understand the point of before you realize that Bonnie was the entire point.

ISAT is about comfort media. Why do we play the same video games over and over again? Why do we avoid watching the finale of our favorite shows? What is truly comforting: a story with no conflict, or a story where you always know what is about to happen? Do you want to live in a scary, uncontrollable world, or do you want to play Stardew Valley? Do you want a person or a character?

When I beat Earthbound for the first time (and if you don't know, the prologue/ISAT battle system is just Mother) and watched the ending cutscene where the characters part ways and say goodbye...I felt a little bit sad. I wanted them to be together forever. But that's something only characters could ever be.

#these aren't deep or unique thoughts they're just the specific aspect of ISAT that made it one of the most interesting gaming experiences #i actually like the prologue much more than ISAT for just this reason #its honestly a video game art piece that's created to give the player a very specific experience #that makes them an aspect of the narrative that is told #it's. incredible. #in stars and time #start again start again start again #start again: a prologue #isat #god and there is so so so so much more to say here #what a rich and complex and fascinating game that made me cry like a baby #i dont even kin sif. we arent similar at all. #i cant imagine how devastating this game would have been if i did #but I do have a deep relationship with escapsim #and i write about it a lot #and video games about being video games are wonderful #as are stories about being stories #and why we consume stories. how we use them. how they save us and hurt us. #never played a video game that used its medium so well #i bet undertales also pretty good at that but this is more so i think #stories about stories have to be about why we love stories #and im not an artsy person and i roll my eyes a bit when people talk about the spiritual neccesity of art #i think people need stories because the world is sad and hard and boring and we want to think about something else for a while. #some people need to be anywhere but here #and sometimes if you're Lil Depressed-Ass Snufkin that looks like being here forever #baby cringe-ass snufkin big hat idiot

[e17omm]

My thoughts on Penacony act 1 (spoilers):

Just finished with the first Penacony quest, and I think it was a mess of good quests.

What I mean is that, I dont think I should be thinking "this is a really good event quest" and "this is a really good character quest" in the main story.

And Firefly's death? The fact they tried to hammer in the emotional damage with the picture after her 1 minute death scene - that part made me laugh. They are trying so hard.

Well, sorry Hoyo, but you're not getting a free Himeko that easily. I've know this girl for half a day and basically her entire character is screaming "death flags!" in my face.

You cant make me feel sad about the death of a character that is created to be killed off. The sad part about deaths in stories is that it robs the character of everything they could have been. When you have a character that could have continued their arc, but its cut off before that can happen - thats emotional. When deaths have deep impacts on the other characters - thats emotional. But I doubt Firefly's death is going to impact the Trailblazer after a few main story quests. They're going to be sad about her death now, but we did not know her long enough for it to have any long-term impact on our character arc.

Killing off a character that is screaming "I AM GOING TO DIE OR SOMETHING HORRIBLE IS GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME!!" in basically every scene isnt emotional. They're just fulfilling their purpose to die. (Not to mention we meet her halfway through the quest and she is killed off in that very same quest. Imagine if HI3 Himeko was introduced in chapter 9 and Final Lesson was a minute long.)

I also dont really like how blindly and quickly trusting the Trailblazer has become. And just, the ignoring of any possible threats to us. We hear that something is up with Penacony from Welt and Himeko, so what do we do when we get into the dreamscape? Fuck around. Play fair games. Hang out with this girl we just met who wants to take us to her secret spot outside of the safe area of the dreamscape. Not-Sampo comes up and straight up tells us that something is wrong with the dreamscape and we do absolutely nothing with that information.

I know how negative all that sounds, but I actually really liked the individual parts of the quest.

Just not, together. The tour thing with Firefly feels like an event quest with all the damn gimmicks and minigames we're getting tutorials about. And when we go to her secret spot it feels like a character quest. And had those parts been that - an event quest and a character quest - that would have been fine.

But its in the main story? It feels so out of place.

Back to the thing about trust - I feel like the presentation has really fallen in quality. From the stiffness of animations outside of cutscenes, but now the voicelessness of the Trailblazer is really harming the scenes.

Because it barely feels like they can think for themselves. We never have a moment to ourselves to think through that, holy shit Stelle, EVERYONE AROUND YOU MIGHT BE LYING. The only person we should trust the most is ourselves - not even the other members of the Astral Express can be fully 100% blindly trusted because we got a red illusionist on the ship!

But we dont get any inner monologues about that - we just go along with what everyone else says. Or; whoever we decide to trust the most in that moment.

TL;DR I liked most of everything in isolation. I liked all the pieces, but I didnt like it when they all got put together. And the presentation is starting to suffer. Mainly the stiff animations and the lack of inner monologues for the Trailblazer in MANY situations where we shouldnt be blindly trusting everyone around us.

#honkai star rail #spoilers #honkai star rail spoilers

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 20] FINAL

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, sex toys, shibari, dom!seungcheol, dirty talk, overstimulation/forced orgasms, squirting, degradation, name calling, daddy!kink, gags! 😍💕 ✨HAPPY NEW YEAR!!✨ Here’s to more fun fics in 2021! I can’t believe this is our last chapter though omg 😭 It’s been suuuuch a journey and a privilege to write this little series out! I’ve honestly thought about a camgirl/boy series for like, over a year now, and I’m glad I finally did it! I completed one of my goals! 🥺💕 2020 was definitely a wild one, but I want to thank you all so fuckin’ much for supporting me and stickin’ it out with me all year! Here’s to more in the coming year!💕 Also I was proofreading this at the dining table last night thinking my roommate wouldn’t come out of their room but they did(while I was making dinner and my hands were dirty so I couldnt close my laptop ☠️) and they walked past my laptop and now I’m convinced they saw my fucking smut fic right in the open so yes my little mini-break next week is MUCH needed cause I am ✨embarrassed✨ 🤣 I’ll still do my inbox roundup tomorrow and probably answer a bunch of small thirst posts ‘n stuff throughout the week but there won’t be any drabbles! For now, enjoy chapter 20 🥺, have a safe weekend, and remember that I love you~ ❤️🍒💕

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 COMPLETE

Seungcheol wakes up much earlier than you do the next morning; pressing a kiss to your forehead as you groan and snuggle deeper into your pillow.

“Baby, I need to go run some errands for a little bit, okay? Just keep sleeping, you don’t need to get up yet. But, I made breakfast and put it in the microwave for you when you decide to get up later.”

His voice is muffled and you can barely understand what he’s saying but you nod; a soft sigh on your lips when you drift back into dreamland. He takes his time getting ready, checking his phone notifications as he gets dressed and places a note on the nightstand knowing that you didn’t catch a single word he said.

‘Hey, did you get everything I asked for?’

Jimin🧍🏻: of course, who do you think I am? Jeongguk?

Jimin🧍🏻: and btw, i’m just giving you a crash course okay? We don’t really have a ton of time

Jimin🧍🏻: did you watch those tutorial videos I sent you?

‘Yeah, I did some practice on my breaks, but I guess you can tell me if I’m doing anything wrong.’

Jimin🧍🏻: okee, i’ll be waiting. Don’t get here too late!

‘I’ll be otw soon. Thanks again, Jimin.’

“Ow--damn, okay, you don’t need to tug on it so much!”

“Sorry, I’ll be careful! And why are we practicing on you anyway?! Couldn’t you just have shown me pictures or something?”

“How else will you learn if not on an actual body? It doesn’t work the same way, Seungcheol.” Jimin pauses, checking himself in the mirror. “Also, keep in mind she does have boobs so just… go slow, okay? It’s not gonna sit like this on her.”

Seungcheol blushes a crimson red; biting the inside of his cheek at how amateur he was at this.

“Okay…”

Seungcheol is gone for a lot longer than you anticipate and although he replies quickly to your texts, you can’t help but be curious about where he’d gone and what he was doing.

Especially knowing that the two of you had to film tonight and knowing that everything was up to Seungcheol.

A shiver rolls down your body at the thought and you quickly try to shake off the nerves that seem to slowly invade your body when your mind starts to wander.

“It’ll be fine, I’m sure…”

“I’m home!”

“Where have you--oh, that’s… a b-big box? Um, should I be concerned...”

Seungcheol grins, shrugging as he sets it onto the kitchen counter. “Just some supplies for tonight. I had to go pick them up from a friend but I had to make sure everything was right.” He notices the way you can’t seem to take your eyes off of the box; eyes twinkling when he makes his way towards you.

He tilts your head up to meet his in a searing kiss, lips easing into a smile when you wrap your arms around his neck and melt under his touch. You moan against his lips just before he pulls away; staring dreamily at him while his hands start to roam over your clothed body.

“We have a long night ahead of us, sweetheart. Let’s pamper you a little before then, hmm?”

j__min: ??? where’s the loverboy

j__min has donated $200

angelhan has donated $75

therealchan99 has donated $50

xcaliburDK has donated $75

xcaliburDK: is that the sybian? Haven’t seen that in a looong while

You bite your lip and nod, somewhat shy as you sit alone in front of the camera. “Seungcheol’s still… setting up but he told me to start! I’m a little nervous, to be honest…” Your eyes flit to Seungcheol who rummages through the box in the kitchen and from the angle you’re sat in, you can’t see a single thing he takes out.

Earlier, he’d cooked you your favorite meal and even took the time to give you a full body massage before the two of you cuddled on the sofa and watched a movie. To you, it seemed a little too suspiciously tame and you only found yourself more nervous when he made you drink two glasses of water and ever so quietly announced it was time to start getting ready for the camshow.

“He’s being so suspicious! He was even gone for a few hours earlier today…” You mumble; brows furrowed at the camera before checking the comments.

It still amazed you every time with how much money you and Seungcheol made from the camshows and videos and it made you feel even better knowing that everyone loved the chemistry the two of you had together. There were a lot of video requests and ideas mixed in with the comments at any given time and you were definitely ready to pitch some to Seungcheol now that you’d rebranded your channel to be a couple’s channel instead.

“Almost done, sweetheart!”

gc__koo: he told me to watch cuz he was being suspicious with me too 

gc__koo has donated $50

alphagyu97: what is he even plotting

alphagyu97: i am excited to see the sybian again tho ngl

artist8hao: pretty baby gonna squirt for us again?

universe_WZ: hell fuckin yea let us see how fuckin wrecked you get on that machine

You feel your pussy clench around emptiness at their comments; already feeling yourself getting wetter and wetter with the anticipation.

Movement out of the corner of your eye catches your attention and Seungcheol walks towards the bed with a wide smile and the same box in hand. “Ready?” You can only nod back slowly, watching as he dumps the contents of the box right next to your body.

gc__koo: oy

chwenon: oh shit

sleepy_wonu: oh baby, you’re in for it now

sleepy_wonu has donated $100

Your entire body fills with warmth as you look over the various objects; unsure of where to really look first. “I, um--”

A stack of red ropes sits next to a small bullet vibrator that sits next to a ball gag that sits next to a pair of EMT shears and your eyes immediately flit up to Seungcheol who only smirks back at your shocked expression. “I had some other toys I wanted to use but I figured I should go easy on you, y’know? Since you showed me some mercy last night.”

Nodding, you reach out towards the ropes, touching them shyly. “Why red?”

“Thought they’d be on theme for you, babygirl.”

Seungcheol takes his time; remembering Jimin’s words when he tugs the ropes around your wrists.

“Colour, babygirl?”

“G-green… daddy…”

He nods, sitting up on his knees behind you as you sit on the sybian and face the camera. You bite your lip, somewhat embarrassed that you were already soaking the toy underneath you as Seungcheol worked to bind your arms behind you.

“D--daddy, where did you l-learn this?” You whisper, somewhat curious if this had anything to do with why he was gone for so long earlier in the day.

“Mm, daddy’s friend Jimin was kind enough to help me get the tools and teach me a few tricks to make sure I kept my babygirl safe. Wasn’t that kind of him?” You nod gently, gulping when you shift atop the machine slightly in hopes of relieving some of the growing sexual tension in your body. “Why don’t you thank him properly, sweetheart?”

Your hazy eyes make eye contact with the camera, head tilted slightly. “T-thank you, J-Jimin… for--for helping daddy…”

j__min: omg a shoutout ive made it

kitty_junjun: we never thought we’d see the day

tangerine_kwan: and here we all thought you were gonna be the bad guy huh

hoshi_tiger_xx: like when u only see previews of the book online but the rest of it is different ykwim

Seungcheol makes sure your arms are bound snug enough but not too tight; leaning away slightly to admire his rope work. “Feeling okay so far, babygirl?”

Nodding, you whine back slightly. “Y-yes, daddy… But… my--my pussy wants s-something…” He laughs in return, readjusting so that he’s sitting on your side this time to give himself easier access to start the rest of the bindings.

“Is that so? You’re gonna have to be a little more patient this time ‘cause daddy’s not done yet.” He starts working on the rest of the harness; going slow and checking in with you often to make sure none of the ropes were digging into your skin or making you uncomfortable. “You’ll have to forgive me a little though, I’m admittedly a ‘lil inexperienced so our pretty babygirl is only going to be tied up in this pretty harness for tonight.”

gentleman_josh95: the fact u even took the time to learn just for her

gentleman_josh95 has donated $100

artist8hao: seriously, the dedication

kitty_junjun: we stan a man who knows safety and etiquette 

Comments of reassurance and donations flood in at Seungcheol’s small apology and although the two of you are in your own world; you can tell from just the amount of pings coming from your laptop that they all seemed to be encouraging him.

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence as Seungcheol continues to move around you on the bed to finish the harness and a smile graces his lips when he starts to secure the last knots in the back. He can’t help but mentally pat himself on the back at how neatly he’d done it for his first time.

“There. All done, baby.”

Your eyes flit to the laptop’s screen to see yourself; cheeks hot when you see how fucked out you already look and he hadn’t even touched you properly or turned on the machine.

The star harness Seungcheol had tied looks pretty with red ropes and you can’t hide your smile at how good it looks on you too either. “Ah, daddy made it really p-pretty… Thank you.”

This time, Seungcheol nods, letting you admire yourself as he silently reaches for the small remote for the sybian, switching it on.

Your entire body lurches forward as soon as the vibrations attack your clit and you immediately find yourself moaning and grinding down onto the machine as he gives you some relief.  

“You’re welcome, babygirl. Now let’s really have some fun, huh?”

You need to cum.

Badly.

“Awww, is my pretty baby drooling? Does it feel that good on your sensitive ‘lil clit?” He teases, smoothing down your hair as you cry around the ball gag in your mouth; drool seeping out from the side of your lips when he raises the vibrations a setting higher.

You don’t know how many times he’d played with the settings and edged you by now, but all you do know is that the urge to cum only grows stronger as you grind against the machine, soaking it with your wetness as you chase the pleasure building up in your body again.  

Surely cumming was okay, right? He never said you couldn’t.

You whimper around the ball gag, eyes fluttering shut when the tension in your body snaps in the blink of an eye and your thighs clamp down onto the sides of the machine. Throwing your head back, you moan against the gag and ride out your high as Seungcheol watches you from the side.

“Mm, bet that felt good, huh? But I know you want something in that greedy ‘lil cunt of yours, don’t you? You want daddy’s cock slamming into your tight ‘lil hole ‘til it’s full of my cum, right, sweetheart?” He licks his lips, turning off the sybian as you slump forward.

universe_WZ: shit shes so sensitive

chwenon: especially with her arms bound like that i bet she’s on cloud nine rn

gentleman_josh95: her cute lil head is probably all fuzzy already from all the sensations

therealchan99 has donated $100

gc__koo has donated $75

j__min has donated $150

All you can do is whimper and nod; teary eyes blinking back at Seungcheol as he smirks and leans in towards you.

“Mmm, you’ll get what you want eventually. But for now, you’re gonna cum again.”

He turns the sybian back on, licking his lips when he sees your body tensing again. It was always easier to get you to cum a second time and his point is proven when you mewl around the ball gag a few minutes later; chest heaving in stuttered breaths as you try to shy away from the toy still vibrating against your overly sensitive clit when you’re quickly thrown into another orgasm.

“You always cum for daddy so easily, don’t you, babygirl?”

Your head feels fuzzy after already cumming twice in such a short span of time but you nod, head lolling to the side as Seungcheol finally turns the sybian off for good.

Seungcheol gives you a second to catch your breath before he’s scooting in and fiddling with the clasps at the back of your head to take the ball gag off.

A thread of saliva connects your lips to the gag and you whimper at how good it feels to be able to actually speak again. “D-daddy…” Drool drips from your mouth as your lead lolls forward and Seungcheol is quick to bring a hand up to keep your head up as he looks into your lust filled eyes.

“Colour, sweetheart?”

“Still g-green…” He nods back, checking to make sure none of the ropes had shifted. “Would you like some water before we continue, baby?”

“Yes, daddy…”

He fetches you a glass of water, tilting it against your lips as you down the entire glass and you find yourself a little surprised at how needed it was. “Thank you, d-daddy…”

“You’re welcome, babygirl. Ready to keep going?”

You nod, a little bit more energized. “I hope everyone, mmh, l-likes the show so f-far~” Your teary vision prevents you from reading the comments and before you can even make an effort to, Seungcheol is already helping you off of the machine and helping you sit on the bed across from him.

alphagyu97: ugh she looks so fucking good in that harness

angelhan: right? That shade of red looks so good against her skin too

angelhan: so fuckin pretty

tangerine_kwan: pics for the private room later? Plz i beg

Seungcheol takes this time to take off his boxer briefs, cock curving up against his abdomen when he’s fully naked across from you. He wraps a hand around his cock, moaning and spreading the precum down his shaft as you watch. “D’you want this, baby?”

Your lips fall open in a silent moan as you watch Seungcheol jerk himself off and you can’t help but squirm. “Y-yes…”

“Tell me exactly what you want then. Let them hear what a filthy little slut you are for me.” You can’t help but feel miserably empty watching him and despite having already cum twice, you want his cock fucking you open and making you cum again.

“I--I--”

“Yes, babygirl?”

“I, ngh, I want d-daddy’s cock… Please? Ah, I--I wanna feel you fucking my--my pussy into the, mmh, s-shape of your c-cock… And I w-want you to c-cum inside my--my slutty little h-hole…”

Seungcheol scoffs, hips shallowly thrusting up into his enclosed fist. “That’s right. You’re just my slutty ‘lil babygirl that lets me use all her tight holes how I please, right? You like it when I cum down your throat and in your pretty ‘lil ass. But we all know you like it best when I cum in your hot ‘lil cunt. Makes you feel all warm and full, doesn’t it? You like it when my cum is dripping out of your spent cunt and sliding down your shaky thighs.” This time you nod furiously as you whine back in response.

“P-please… Can’t wait any--anymore!”

This time, the impatience takes over as you slightly tug on the ropes; whining when they don’t give. “Daddy!”

And this time, he gives in quicker than he anticipates, growling as he reaches for the EMT shears to cut you from the harness. “Don’t let your arms down, no matter how much you want to. You’re going to strain your arms if you move too fast so let me handle it, okay, sweetheart?”

The sudden gentleness in his voice has a giddy warmth pouring over you as you nod and sit still while he cuts at various points of the harness to make the ropes fall loose around your arms and chest. You keep your arms in the same position like he requested and you soon feel his hands roaming your skin and massaging your arms to get the blood flowing again.

“You’re so good for me, baby.” He whispers against your hair, leaning down to kiss your shoulder before he slowly easing your arms down from being folded behind your back.

He continues to massage your arms for a few more minutes before it’s you that’s getting impatient. “Daddy… Can you fuck me now?” Whispering, you slightly turn your body to the side to meet his gentle stare.

Seungcheol laughs under his breath, nodding. “Lay on your back for me, legs spread.”

You follow his orders as you quickly scramble to get into position; legs spread wide for him to situate himself between.

“Mm, your pussy is still so fuckin’ wet. I wanna taste you on my tongue, baby.” Whines spill from your lips as you shake your head ‘no.’

“No! My p-pussy feels empty, I need y-your cock, daddy… ‘n I’m so wet, you can probably, ah, just s-slide your cock in…”

He wraps a hand around his cock just as you wrap your legs around his waist and he guides himself until the head of his cock is right at your entrance.

Neither of you say a word as he slowly starts to sink his cock in; guttural moans on his lips when he meets no resistance and bottoms out in a singular thrust. “Holy fuck, your cunt is so fuckin’ wet. Shit, and so t-tight!” You clench around him, already feeling good with his cock inside of you as you beg him to fuck you hard and fast.

“Ngh, p-please fuck me like--like I’m your, hah, c-cocksleeve… I want it f-fast, daddy!”

He grits his teeth at your words; drawing his hips back before snapping them into you just how you wanted. “Fast, hmm? All you think about in that pretty head of yours is my cock pounding you open, huh? Slamming into you so fuckin’ good, it makes your toes curl when you cum.”

Seungcheol starts a quick pace, already feeling the pleasure building up for himself when you’re reduced to garbled noises and broken cries of his name. The heels of your feet dig into the small of his back as you try to press him in closer and he’s quick to reach for the small bullet vibrator left on the bed next to your body.

“Your body is so fuckin’ sensitive, I can already feel how tight you’re getting around me. So fuckin’ greedy to cum too. Already came twice and you still want more. You’re not satisfied until your whole body is shaking underneath me, huh, sweetheart?” He turns the small toy on, pressing it to your clit as you yelp and let out choked sobs.

“Ah, ngh, d-daddy, my--my clit’s t-too sen--sensitive! I--I can’t--!” Squirming, you feel the pressure building up obscenely quick; bottom lip quivering when he takes one of your free hands and makes you hold the toy to your swollen clit.

“Just a little more, sweetheart. Don’t you wanna cum?”

He angles his thrusts to graze against your g-spot and loud cries of his name leave your lips in a hurried, jumbled mess when he only doubles his pace.

The sound of donations and comments pour in like water and get lost within the ringing in your ears; unable to even warn Seungcheol that you’re about to cum when you feel your entire body starting to lock up underneath him.

Your lips part in a silent scream and your back bows off of the bed, thighs shaking uncontrollably as you cum for the third time. Seungcheol growls, fucking you through it as you squirt all over his lower half.  He finds it harder and harder to thrust into you as you cum, but he feels himself quickly following suit with your warm walls fluttering around his cock.

“Fuck, baby, that’s right. Squirt for me, get me fuckin’ soaked while you cum.” He uses a free hand to make sure you keep the toy pressed to your clit, growling when he starts to unload his cum inside of you. “Mmh, gonna fill your cunt up with what you want, baby.”

A shaky moan leaves your lips as you feel him throbbing inside your pussy; walls clamped down onto him in a vice grip as you ride out the remnants of your orgasm.

“Ah, d-daddy’s cumming suh--so much inside of my p-pussy…”

Whining, you feel Seungcheol’s grip on your hand give way as he rides out his pleasure and you take the opportunity to turn off the small bullet vibrator while he doesn’t notice.

You watch his face contort in pleasure, hips still shallowly thrusting into you as his entire body shivers above you.

“D-daddy’s so h-handsome...” You mumble, cheeks hot when he cracks a smile through the pleasure wracking his body and chuckles under his breath. 

“Thank you, babygirl.” 

After you end the show, Seungcheol makes sure to cuddle with you on the bed for a little while longer.

“One more glass of water, baby.” You whine in response, pouting up at him before he gets up from the soaked sheets. 

“But I already had a glass! If you have a piss kink just say so, ‘Cheol!”

He lets out a boisterous laugh at your comment, trudging back to the bed from the kitchen with another glass of water for you. “You need to be hydrated, sweetheart. You came three times and we played a little more rough today. I just wanna make sure you’re okay.” 

“Fine, but you didn’t deny my comment.” You snarkily reply, taking the glass from him as you down the water. 

“Don’t make me have to punish you again! I’ll have you know I still need to get you all washed up and change the bed--”

A faint pinging has the two of you turning to the laptop; still on your camming homepage from where you’d checked the revenues from tonight’s show. 

A small [1] sits above your inbox and Seungcheol is quick to turn to you with an eyebrow raised. “I thought you turned off the messaging system on your profile?” 

You tilt your head in confusion, handing him the emptied glass. “I did. The only messages I should get are from, like, the actual system admins or other creator accounts which, I haven’t received any ‘til... now, I guess?”

Seungcheol sets the glass down onto the nightstand before he takes a seat next to you, dragging the laptop closer as you go to check the notification. 

“’Love&Letter Films’? Aren’t they one of the biggest adult film companies?” Mumbling, you click on the message, giving yourself and Seungcheol a second to process the message that stares back at you; a shocked smile on your lips.

‘Hello!

I hope this message finds Cherry and Seungcheol well. 

We, at ‘Love&Letter Films’, have really enjoyed the shows and videos from your channel throughout the years and we really have enjoyed watching the growth of your channel and the addition of Seungcheol to it. The dynamics between the two of you are rare in this industry and we’ve yet to see anyone like the two of you in this market. 

The shows from the last two nights have proven that the two of you have the right kind of chemistry to film together for bigger productions and we would love to hire you for a few film productions we have planned in the upcoming weeks as a feeler. Of course, all expenses paid by us if you would kindly take our offer. 

We love the various scenes and roles that the two of you take on with ease and we would love to help propel your careers forward, should you pursue a career in the adult entertainment industry. 

Please don’t hesitate to contact me as I’ve listed my contact information below. I’m excited to hear from the two of you and hope to work with you in the future on many projects.

Respectfully, 

Kwon Soonyoung, L&L FILMS CEO’

#cherrybomb!cheol #seungcheol smut #scoups smut #seventeen smut #svt smut #scoups scenarios #scoups imagines #seungcheol imagines #seungcheol scenarios #svt scenarios #svt imagines #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #scoups fic #seungcheol fic #scoups #seungcheol #svt fic #seventeen fic

[chaos-burst]

Hey! :) I’ve wanted to play d&d for a while now, and after getting into critical role i finally decided to convince my friends to play with me. None of us have played before, so im both exited and a bit nervous since i’ll be the dm. We don’t know anyone who plays, and i’m not very comfortable with palying with strangers, so we’ll be diving right in together! Do you or your followers have any tips or good resources to recommend for new players and/or dms? Any tips would be greatly appreciated! :D

Hey there!

I’m very flattered that you would ask me for DMing tips, but I just have to preface this saying that I am a first time DM myself and I am currently on session 13 of my campaign. But I can see if I can list some things that I found useful building my first campaign :) And I totally feel you not being comfortable with strangers, I play with a group of friends and we were all first time players when we started!

Let’s start with resources! (I will put the links in a reblog bc tumblr is a dick about posts with external links in them. Sry for the hassle!)

Probably a bit redundant, but nevertheless very helpful: The core rulebooks for D&D. Which is to say The Dungeon Master Guide, The Monster Manual and The Players Handbook. Bc those are expensive as fuck, check out this lovely thing (1).

Then, depending on whether you play online or live: Roll20.net (2) You can invite your players to your campaign and make maps for encounters with minis on them, you can insert music that plays in the background and it also rolls dice for you if you have to roll a big amount of dice and don’t want to do math ;)

There is an encounter builder on kobold-fightclub (3) that can help you balance encounters according to your party’s level! I have found it quite helpful and it’s also an easy way to filter monsters for a specific terrain when you know that you’ll be running through a swamp/desert/cave etc.!

I also found this this cheat sheet very helpful, esp regarding the different conditions that I can never seem to remember.

Then, ofc, one of CR’s sponsors: dndbeyond (4). Me and my friends bought a subscription bc damn is it useful to be able to click on anything on your character sheet and see what the hell it means. It also helps you track your spellslots/HP etc. during combat. 

Something I also did was watch Matt’s videos (5) on how he DMs. Altho it bears to say: Don’t compare yourself to Matt Mercer. It will only stress you out. 

You like maps? So do I! Check these out (6/7). 

You want to keep track of your npcs and important lore and places and everything? You could try worldanvil (8)! It’s like building a wiki for your own world!

And then about tips. It is probably easier to give tips when you have specific questions than it is to give general tips, but I’ll do my best! I’m sure many experienced DMs want to chime in and add to it :)

Communication is (as with most things in life) key to everything. Get together with your players for a Session 0 and just talk about what kind of game you want to run and what kind of game they want to play. There are people who like combat more than roleplay or vice versa. There are people who want to play an evil campaign or they want a lot of political intrigue or they are soft marshmallows like I am and don’t want permanent character deaths and so on and so on. Just get together and talk about what you guys want to create. Also talk about the characters with each individual player.Ask them about triggers they have, so you can avoid topics. Ask them how they feel about an NPC flirting with their character. It goes the other way around as well! Tell them about your boundaries and your expectations. One of my friends wanted to make a character with a neutral evil alignment. I told that it’s fine, as long as there’s the prospect for the character to evolve towards a neutral or good alignment, bc I have no interest in dm-ing an “evil” campaign. 

Something that might make running a campaign easier for you is if your players’ characters already know each other before the game starts. If you’re like me you will sweat bullets thinking about how to get them to work towards a common goal. If they’re already friends/rivals/lovers/colleagues/members of the same adventuring guild you will not have that problem. And they can give you some notes on how they envision the relationships to be/how they met.

You can start your adventure with one of the official adventures that are out there if you want to! You don’t have to do a whole ton of worldbuilding like I did bc I’m a crazy person and have my whole setting homebrewed. If not, you can always make life as easy as possible for yourself and start small! Build a small town with a few key NPCs, put a small assortment of possible quests there and then only roughly sketch out what you want the “outside world” to look like. I as a player love some context when I build characters, so if you want to give your players a small introduction into the campaign setting, I think that would be helpful and also helps creating characters who fit into your setting! If you want to run a campaign that has tons of dragons and poisoned oceans that cannot be crossed by mortals it would be sad if a player came to you and gave you the character sheet for a sailor.

If you do a whole campaign, I found it helpful to have a rough idea about different factions and two or three major events that shape your world. Ideas for later quests will eventually tie into big world events when the players get higher level!

Draw yourself a map. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or anything, but at some point there will be a question about “where is the next big city, we need to buy healing potions” and you will feel much safer if you just have a piece of paper (analogue or virtual) with like... a rough outline, some landmarks and some cities on it. At least that’s how it was for me!

You don’t have to reinvent the wheel. Don’t beat yourself up if your first quests are “standard” stuff like “Take care of this giant rat infestation in the cellar of the tavern.” or “My purple dragoncat has been abducted, please get him back for me.”. I started my campaign with small quests before getting to a small arc and then I want to work towards bigger arcs eventually. But for new players and a new DM I found it very helpful to keep things low stakes to not stress anyone out too much. If you fuck up the giant rat infestation, the world will not end, you know? That is nice. Also works well as a tutorial for everyone! Combat is intimidating! So many rules! Take your time to figure out how stuff works with some nice, small quests and some not-too-complex-combat encounters!

You don’t have to follow every rule. There are so many rules for everything and that can be helpful but it can also be stressful. You don’t have to do everything by the book and if you notice that some rules annoy you and your players, you can always change them as you go along! (Cats have nightvision. Sometimes the rulebooks are dumb.)

Don’t get hung up on too many details. I love worldbuilding, but I get obsessive easily. Sometimes I think my world isn’t ready enough bc I tend to think like a writer who has to have everything figured out. That is not the case with d&d! Sure, It’s good if you know stuff. But d&d is not only about planning, it’s also about improvising. And the world will grow while you play in it! Before you know it you’ll go like “I want to have an encounter with this cool ice monster. I need an icy landscape.” and then you will make one. And maybe it wasn’t there before, but who cares. Your players will be excited and you can make up the lore as you move along! 

Did I mention communication? 

If you have specific questions about certain aspects of DMing or how to start, feel free to message me anytime :) I hope this helps a little bit! I’ll reblog in a second with the links!

#Anonymous #dungeons and dragons #d&d #ask #anon #screeching into the void

[bentforkent]

glittery

penelope garcia x emily prentiss 

a/n: whipped something up for valentines dayyyy, i hope u enjoy! happy vday from me to u. also shoutout to cj @hotchseyebrows for helping me with this i am A Mess and u are the best. 

content warning: fluff, SMUT (18+), alcohol mentions, oral sex, first time, begging, sexy-ass emily prentiss

word count: 2028

in which emily and penelope are crafting for valentine’s day, and some feelings come up 

-  - - -  “You’re more glittery than normal,” Emily remarks, pushing Penelope’s front door open and surveying the scene in front of her.

“You’re here!” Penelope scrambles to get out of her chair, pushing away from the kitchen table that’s covered in shimmery pinks, reds, purples, and rushing to wrap her arms around Emily’s waist. To free her arms and return Penelope’s hug, Emily sets her plastic grocery bag onto the counter. The cheap bottles of wine inside clink against each other musically, making Penelope’s ears perk up and gesture towards the bag.

Emily launches into a retelling of her time at the grocery store: There was a weird woman there who Emily was exactly 73 percent sure was following her. As she tells the story, she flits around Penelope’s kitchen with ease, finding the bottle opener and two stemmed glasses. Penelope watches her intently, entranced by her black-cat movements. It’s not lost on her how easily Emily makes use of her space. Penelope’s space, that is. Emily is here, in her kitchen, popping a cork---two corks, she’d bought pink wine specifically for Penelope--and washing her hands and drying said hands on her tea towels and lounging against her countertops, mindful of her cluttered space and figurines. It’s domestic. It’s domestic and overwhelming and Penelope just might burst.

“Anyways,” Emily says, concluding her story and turning back to Penelope, glass looped languidly between her fingers. “Why are you covered in craft glitter?”

“We, my friend, are making Valentine’s Day cards,” Penelope says.

“Alright,” Emily hums, taking a seat at the end of the table. “I’m not very crafty.”

“I am! I’ll teach you.”

- - -  -

“Pass me the scissors, please,” Penelope requests. Careful of the blade, Emily reaches across the table to hand Penelope the glue-sticky scissors. After Penelope’s careful tutorial on how to cut a perfect heart and administer the perfect amount of campy shimmer, the room fell silent save for the jazzy music playing in the background--Amy Winehouse, at Emily’s request--and the soft sounds of crafting--snip, paste, glitter, repeat. Snip, paste, glitter, repeat. Snip. Paste. Glitter. Repeat.

Emily pauses her routine of gluing a piece of red cardstock to a pink one. She’d been considering her next question carefully, debating whether she wants to ask it at all.  “Who are you making these valentines for, anyways?” Attempting nonchalance, she takes a sip of her wine.  

Penelope can read Emily like a book. Not even looking up from her homemade card, maintaining Emily’s same nonchalance, Penelope replies, “Why does it matter? You have a crush on me or something?”

Obviously Emily has a crush on her.

Penelope knows.

She’s known since a few months ago, on a random Thursday, when Emily had shyly brought a cup of coffee into her office. Penelope had never seen Emily at a loss for words before, but she was just so anxious about if she’d gotten the right coffee order. Penelope’s definitely not a profiler, but it really didn’t take much to figure out the strange blush on Emily’s cheeks. Thank god she did, too, because Penelope was just about making herself sick pining after Emily. She’s had a thing for her for as long as she could remember; since Emily had settled herself into the BAU all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. And then Penelope had discovered reciprocation of those feelings and her heart soared and she just wanted to wrap her arms around Emily and fucking kiss her.

But they’re still doing the “best friends” thing. God, does Penelope just want to stop this whole stupid back and forth act where they both pretend like they’re just best friends. But she’s playing hard-to-get. Too often had she given herself away too soon just to be let down later. So she’s keeping the upper hand on this one, because it matters. Emily matters.

And on an entirely separate note, watching Emily flounder and figure out Penelope’s feelings for herself is quite entertaining. Penelope only feels a tiny bit bad about that.  

“No, I’m just curious,” Emily says carefully, teetering into defensiveness. She continues gluing her cardstock, letting the sound of her dragging the paste across the paper serve as an ending to the conversation.

“No?” There’s a playful lilt to Penelope’s voice, but Emily is embarrassed she asked and quite frankly, done talking about it. The air thickens, and Penelope doesn’t feel much like joking anymore.

“No.”

There’s a few moments of silence. Amy Winehouse croons, Penelope presses a marker across her Valentine, scrawling a message onto it. Emily’s scowl radiates through the room.

“You’re a big baby, Emily Prentiss,” Penelope says bluntly.

Emily sets her glue stick onto the table, crossing her arms around her chest and leaning back in her chair. “How am I a baby?” Her words are calm, careful.

With a dramatic sigh, Penelope holds up the Valentine she’d been working on for the greater part of an hour. She could hear Emily building her walls up and she’s tired of all of that. The card is beautiful, obviously, having been carefully crafted under Penelope’s skillful hand. “Emily” is written in shimmery purple bubble letters, surrounded by little hand drawn hearts. There’s a lengthy message attached, heartfelt and sincere.

“The valentines are for you, you beautiful, oblivious disaster,” Penelope says. “Everything is for you.”

Emily purses her lips to avoid the smile from creeping onto her face.

It doesn’t work.

“Oh.” She pauses to think, replaying every interaction she shared with Penelope for the past few months and reframing them. Penelope likes her back. She feels a touch stupid for not figuring it out, but excitement prevails over that emotion. “Yeah?”

Penelope huffs. “Just kiss me, please.” Emily didn’t really need it spelled out for her, because that was her next move, but she appreciates the proactivity from Penelope.

With renewed gusto and pull, Emily leans back in her chair, patting her lap. “C’mere, then.” With a squeal, Penelope gets up out of her chair and skips--literally skips--the short distance to Emily’s side of the table. Emily is looking at her like she hung the stars as Penelope swings her leg over her lap.

“Hi,” Penelope says, holding Emily’s shoulders tightly to steady herself. She’s suddenly nervous, despite all of the frustration and excitement she’d been channeling into this conversation just a second ago. Tentatively, she trails the pad of her thumb down Emily’s nose, letting it fall to her bottom lip.

Emily just wants to look at her, for a second, her rosy cheeks and gentle gaze. But one more second without kissing Penelope is far too long and before Emily’s brain can catch up with her chin, she’s leaning in to press her lips against Penelope’s. 

They’ve both clearly been anticipating this, as they move in sync like they were made to kiss each other, as if their lips were crafted specifically to be against each other in this exact moment. It feels like hours that they’re kissing, that Emily is tugging on the roots of Penelope’s hair, that Penelope is leaving careful bruises against Emily’s jaw.

Once Emily is sufficiently out of breath, she pulls away and rests her forehead against Penelope’s. “Let me eat you out, please,” she requests quietly, trying to catch a bit of air.

Penelope nods, rapidly. “Oh my god, yes, yes,” she says, giggling softly. “You don’t even have to ask, seriously. Okay, yes you do. You do have to ask, but I will always say yes.” 

Emily cuts off Penelope’s rambling with a hot “shhh,” and a suggestive tug on the hem of her skirt.

Penelope blushes, unzipping the pink dress on her side and lifting it over her head.

“You’re matching,” Emily notes lamely. It would be quite literally impossible for her to come up with a sufficient compliment for the way Penelope looks in her lacy, red set. So she gapes, feeling utterly grateful for the chance to even be in the presence of this sun of a woman.

“I had plans,” Penelope says through a grin, standing from Emily’s lap. Wordlessly, with Emily still staring indecently at Penelope’s tits in that bra, they switch spots, Penelope now sitting in the kitchen chair with her legs spread. Emily lowers herself onto her knees in front of Penelope, rubbing soft circles into her skin. She runs her finger along Penelope’s heat, sighing gently at the wetness seeping through the fabric. “You’re so wet for me,” Emily says, peering up at Penelope, who has already settled in and closed her eyes.

“Mhm,” Penelope replies, shifting her hips up in order to shimmy her underwear down her legs.

Emily kisses across the expanse of Penelope’s stomach, taking a moment to rest her chin on the soft skin and look up at the woman in front of her. “You’re so pretty,” she murmurs. “Look at this pretty pussy.”

Penelope lets out an embarrassed whine, nudging Emily’s cheek with her knuckles.

“Keep going, okay, I get it,” Emily chuckles, half to herself. Penelope’s eyelids flutter closed, her fingers tangle in Emily’s hair. It’s soft and for half of a second Penelope wonders what shampoo does she use?, but then Emily is licking and kissing and biting and Penelope’s brain has been reduced to that damned purple glitter and she feels like it might be pouring out of her ears.

When Penelope’s usually getting head, once every few months, Penelope is acutely aware of where her thighs rest, careful to keep them open and away from her suitors’ ears, but Emily is clutching the outside of them like a castaway holds a buoy, tugging her closer. It makes Penelope impossibly more wet. There’s a gasp that could have come from either of them as Emily drags her tongue flat across Penelope’s slit.

Penelope squirms under Emily’s mouth as she continues her careful, skillful tongue work. “‘S good, Emmy, so good,” she moans. Egged on by the praise, Emily wraps her lips around Penelope’s clit, making Penelope emit a high-pitched noise. Emily chuckles against her skin, pulling away to pepper gentle kisses along her thigh.

“Hey,” Penelope pouts at the lack of contact. “C’mon, Em, you’re so mean,”

“I’m mean?” Emily asks with a raised eyebrow, looking up at Penelope through her lashes. “If I’m so mean I’ll leave you here high and dry begging to cum, then.”

This time the gasp is definitely Penelope, scandalized and not used to being told no. Her hips buck forward on their own accord, aching for Emily’s touch. “That’s not fair,” she whines.

Emily taps Penelope’s knees, signaling for her to close them. “Life isn’t fair, sweet girl.”

Penelope weighs her options in her head. It’s clear what Emily wants to hear--begging. But god, if it’s not in Penelope’s nature to put up a fight. She’s contemplating, trying to ignore her lower half twitching in desperation. The moment seems longer than it is--after about 10 seconds and Emily wiping her lips with the back of her hand, she begins grovelling.

“Please Emmy, please,” she says, “I’ll do anything, just...please.” When Emily doesn’t react immediately, Penelope tacks on an extra, “Pretty please.”

Emily grins, leaning back in and pressing a delicate kiss just to the left of where Penelope needs her. “You’re a good girl, baby,” she mumbles under her breath.

“Mhm,” Penelope agrees quietly, letting her hands settle back onto the crown of Emily’s head. The pair devolve into a rhythmic sound of Emily’s mouth and tiny subsequent moans from Penelope. As Emily speeds up, so do Penelope’s whines, so does the rise and fall of Penelope’s chest.

There’s not much build up before Penelope’s snapping, she finds. One second she’s reveling in the feeling of Emily’s warm mouth working her up, and the next her legs are tensing and she’s shaking through an intense wave of orgasm, pushing Emily’s head from where she’s most sensitive.

Emily grins, pressing a sweet kiss to Penelope’s knee, waiting for her to calm and recover. “You’re like, really good at that,” Penelope says with a wide smile, her glassy eyes filled with satiation. “Happy Valentine’s Day, Emmy.”

Emily rises to kiss Penelope softly, swiping her tongue over her bottom lip. “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby.”  

#penemily #emily prentiss #penelope garcia #emily prentiss smut #emily prentiss fanfic #penelope garcia fanfiction #emily x penelope #prentiss x garcia #criminal minds #cm #criminal minds smut #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds fanfiction

[lit-in-thy-heart]

you know what, what's the point of being on this platform if you don't get to bellow into the void about your interests in the hope of finding someone with the same interest?

in light of this, let me inflict a lowdown of the victorian literature (mostly novels because poetry is difficult to collate) that i've read for my module this year upon my mutuals

i'll do a separate one for vampire novels and reblog with the link

because what are the victorians without vampires? straight

bleak house (dickens): what a ride that was! yes, it was nearly a thousand pages and, yes, some chapters i was like can we move on please, but that's dickens for you. honestly, i loved it. if you're looking for thinly-veiled lesbianism, this is the book for you (esda all the way, if they even have a ship name). unfortunately i already knew one of the plot twists due to watching dickensian five years before, but there are plenty more to go around! if you can get through the first chapter describing nothing but fog and the law courts, you're in for one hell of a treat -- just don't google anything about it until you've finished because you will get spoiled (or don't share a house with me, where i'll tell you the entire plot as i'm reading it). definitely recommend, but marking it down for the heteronormativity with allan. (9.5/10)

villette (c. brontë): where to fucking start. i, quite frankly, do not care for charlotte brontë, and when reading the earlier novel agnes grey by anne, i could see some more things that charlotte has filched for this travesty. no victorian novel is going to be without problems, but this one was xenophobic, ableist and, of course, racist. the protagonist doesn't really give anything away, which is meant to make her more mysterious, but it just renders her an empty vessel. oh, and she tells you stuff that she's figured out waaaaaay after she says she's figured it out, a bit like she's allowing you to feel smart for making a connection before going 'oh yeah i knew that like twelve chapters ago, keep up'. some of the passages are really striking and there's maybe one character who's likeable but that's about it. i'd say it's more a story of omission than repression tbh. (4/10)

janet's repentance (eliot): wait, have i even finished this? no, no, i have not. it's fine, i wasn't going to tell you the ending anyway. i did get hooked eventually, there were just a LOT of names thrown around in the first few chapters, and a word that i didn't know was used frequently (turns out it was a name for the followers of this guy). i did get strong hester prynne/arthur dimmesdale vibes from some of the main characters, but janet is a very sympathetic character which, after reading villette, was nice. slightly depressing in some places, but a good enough read if you're not cramming it in the day before your tutorial, because it is mildly dense. (7/10)

the wonderful adventures of mrs seacole in many lands (seacole): not what i'd been expecting to read on my module, what with it being a biography, but enjoyable nonetheless. horrible histories lied to me, though, she was in her 40s/50s when she treated people in the crimean war, not in her 20s, but that's minor. it was actually quite funny??? like she was very reluctant to give away to give away her age and almost slipped up a couple of times, and also made some very biting remarks about people who were passing comment on her skin colour. for a biography, it wasn't hugely biographical, in that she was married for what seemed all of five minutes before her husband died, when in fact they were married for several years, but if you want an in-depth depiction of war, this is for you. not what i'd usually read, but some of the descriptions are so vivid that it does read like a novel in places, though sometimes the descriptions were so detailed that i did tune out at odd intervals. (9/10)

the happy prince and other stories (wilde): if you're feeling low, don't read these. don't. especially not 'the nightingale and the rose', because that was honestly heartbreaking. really well-written, some passages were just beautiful, i just wasn't in the right headspace to fully appreciate it. it also has a lot of death, i should probably explicitly say that. (8/10)

agnes grey (a. brontë): chef's kiss, honestly. if i'd read this last year then i think it definitely would have hit a lot harder, what with agnes moving away from home for the first time and struggling with loneliness around people who she is different from. beautifully written, i'm irritated at myself for not reading it sooner, even though i've owned a copy for about four years or so. agnes does come across as a bit wet sometimes, but those moments are rare and far between, she's overall a resilient character who is trying to make her own way in the world. seeing as i managed to get through the whole thing and didn't lose focus on what i was reading, i rate it higher than jane eyre (which is a rip-off of this anyway). we stan anne. though i am marking it down for the underdeveloped romantic relationship that just pops up (9.5/10)

now for some old classics that weren't taught on my module, but i can't not mention them

a tale of two cities (dickens): this was my first dickens book and oh my word what a book. yeah, okay, lucie is a bit of a wet dishcloth and has basically no personality, but there is definitely something there between her and her maid. sydney is my baby and oh so gorgeously dramatic ("you have kindled me, heap of ashes that i am, into fire"), which was perfect for the pangs of unrequited love. the plot is slightly confusing, and you don't really understand everything until right near the end, but i loved finding parallels in the chapters set in france with the chapters set in britain. oh and the showdown between miss pross and madame defarge is wonderful. i had a tradition of reading it on the run-up to christmas, just because that was the period when i read it for the first time, but i haven't done that for the past two years just because of exams and stuff. now, bleak house just pips it at the post, but i still love it dearly. (9/10)

wuthering heights (e. brontë): i couldn't review victorian literature and not include this. there are very strong similarities between this and villette (seems charlotte really drew on her sisters' work), particularly in terms of me not liking a single one of the characters except hareton. everyone is called cathy. literally. and heathcliff/cathy one is a toxic ship that should not be boarded. it is obsession, not love. the second volume is basically a repeat of the first one, thus showing that humanity will never move past its vices and will be caught in a vicious cycle of self-destruction for the rest of time. again, though, beautifully and vividly written. the characters are the type that you love to hate. (8/10)

the tenant of wildfell hall (a. brontë): what. a. book. this was a book that was simultaneously loved and condemned as scandalous when it came out. there's mystery, there's a woman escaping a horrible situation and making her own living, and there's a well-developed relationship! and the characters are likeable (i love rose, she's great, completely goes off at her brother when she has to do things for him all the time), which always puts it onto a winner. there's one chapter with gilbert that i have to skip just because i hate what he does in it. there are quite a lot of religious references, with redemption playing a huge part in the novel, but even the religious views brontë expresses went against a lot of the teachings of the anglican church at the time. do i even need to say that it's beautifully written if it's anne? marking it down for gilbert's behaviour and arguable control of helen's narrative. (9.5/10)

far from the madding crowd (hardy): i love this book. a little more uplifting than tess but still with the drama and murder you'd expect from hardy. maybe my review is influenced by my tiny crush on bathsheba: she's not the best role model but damn what a woman. gabriel isn't quite bae but i love him all the same, i'm so glad he's happy in the end. (9/10)

#literature #victorian literature #gay #victorian #dark academia #anne bronte #emily bronte #charlotte bronte #dickens #george eliot #mary seacole #queer #oscar wilde #thomas hardy #novels #wuthering heights #jane eyre #villette #agnes grey #bleak house #a tale of two cities #vampires #far from the madding crowd #the tenant of wildfell hall

[not-close-to-straight]

100% Professional (Five)

MASTERLIST

Generic TW: Wade has a breakdown/panic attack 

*******************

It wasn't that Wade was nervous about going on a date. 

He might not be great at dating when it meant open communication and remembering important dates and learning to live with peoples quirks, but he was pretty awesome at first dates. 

Back before-- before-- Wade went on a first date at least once a week. He had specific First Date outfits, go to First Date restaurants, a memorized list of First Date appropriate small talk topics, and the perfect First Date bottle of wine to keep things moving the right naked direction. 

Great first dates led to first date sex, and Wade was just swell at that particular activity.

So no, he wasn't nervous about going on a date. 

But he was bent over the toilet sick to his stomach, unable to eat and practically shaking with nerves over going on a date with Peter. 

"I should cancel." Wade told himself at least a hundred times between saying goodbye to Peter Tuesday night and getting ready to text- confirm the date Wednesday afternoon. "I should just cancel, this is insane." 

He already had the reservation at a new place down the way, Wade had picked out a dark blue long sleeve turtleneck that both hugged all his muscles and covered as much skin as possible, and his First Date jeans were dry cleaned and ready to go. 

"I should cancel." he muttered, staring at himself in the mirror and grimacing over the scars and rough skin. "Peter does not want to be seen out in public with this, this is--- I am--" 

In a moment of sheer panic, Wade searched online for makeup that would cover scars, for a foundation that would even out his rough skin without looking too caked on, for tutorials on applying fake eyebrows so maybe he wouldn't look so weird. He'd been so much prettier the last time he'd gone out on a date and now he was basically approaching hideous and--

Peter doesn't care, he reminded himself, and then just as quickly, but what if he does?

Peter had said he didn't care, but that was in the privacy of Wade's home where no one else saw them. Peter had said he didn't care, but he hadn't seen Wade have a full on break down in public because some little kid pointed and laughed. Peter had said he didn't care, but he wasn't there for the nights Wade couldn't even lie down because everything hurt so he spent the night pacing and staring out the window. Peter had said he didn't care but he wasn't there for the nightmares and the mood swings--

--Peter had said he didn't care but he only saw Wade twice a week and it would be different when he realized Wade couldn't always joke, that he wasn't always patient and that this mess was Wade's reality every single second of every single day. 

Peter had said he didn't care but when it came right down to it, eventually the understanding in those beautiful eyes would turn to pity and then frustration and then boredom and then Peter would move on. 

Just like everyone else. 

Despair swamped Wade and nearly bowled him over, his knees gave out and he crumpled onto the couch, eyes closed tight against an unexpected panic attack, tears trickling down his cheek. 

I can’t do this.

Wade didn't know how long he sat there tipping on the edge of a breakdown, but when his phone chimed, it was only half an hour until their date and Peter was texting him, so Wade wiped the tears away and squinted at the screen. 

From Peter: Ho ho holy crap the weather outside is frightful. 

From Wade: Yeah we should cancel. This was a bad idea. 

The text was sent before Wade even thought it through, his fingers flying over the keyboard to blurt out the same words that had been circling his mind for the last eighteen hours. 

From Peter: Wait, what?

From Peter: You want to cancel because it's raining? 

From Peter: But my umbrella is ever so cute plus I bought galoshes. Do you know weird it felt to ask for galoshes at the store? I was instantly a little child from the early 1900s wanting to stomp in puddles

From Peter: or you know, something like that

From Peter: You want to cancel because of the RAIN?

Wade stared down at his phone for a long time before finally gathering his courage and hitting call, chewing at his lip until it bled as he waited for Peter to pick up. 

"Wade." Peter didn't sound angry or disappointed, he just sounded... curious. "What's going on?" 

"I can't do this." Wade knew he sounded panicked but he didn't have the strength to hide it. "I just-- I just can't." 

"That's alright, I really wasn't up to going out to eat, I always wear a too tight tshirt and then end up with a food baby belly." Peter joked. "You want to just order in or--" 

"No no no, I can't, Pete." the words muffled behind Wade's palms as he hid his face in his hands and tried to tell himself to breathe. "This isn't working, I can't do it." 

"...okay... Um Wade--" 

"Look, you're a cute kid." Wade said in a rush. "And hiring you as a massage therapist was a great idea, but I can't do it anymore. I can't. This is crazy." 

"What's crazy about it?" Peter whispered. "I thought we were doing alright?" 

"I'm not your project, Pete." The words came harsher than Wade intended and he heard Peter suck in a harsh breath on the other end. "You can't fix me with a few massages and a weighted blanket and a little bit of flirting. I know it seems like we've made all this great progress, but the truth is, I'm still as messed up as I ever was, I just hurt a little less sometimes. And yeah, you make me laugh and the flirting is nice but it's like, two hours out of an impossibly shitty existence and I can't do it anymore." 

"Wade--" 

"I've been sick to my stomach all day." Wade didn't really mean to admit that, but he'd gone and said it and couldn't take it back now. "Throwing up all day stressing out about going out in public, about having to pretend I'm normal to get through dinner, fucking panicking about you wanting a kiss or something, or worse is me thinking you'd want a kiss and you pulling away-- I can't do it, Pete. This is tearing me up, I'm not ready."  

"I never thought of you as a project--" 

"No?" Wade bit out, self disgust turning toxic in his chest and spilling into his words. "You expect me to honestly believe you saw a fucked up war vet with screwed up skin and warped muscles and a clear case of PTSD and decided that's who you want to be with?  Or is it because I give you so much extra money after we're done it was worth dealing with my shit because the money was good?” 

Peter cursed out loud and Wade bit at his tongue until it bled. "Shit. Pete, I didn't mean it like that. Not-- not-- fuck see? This is what I mean. I’m messed up and I can’t do this. I can’t. I won’t.” 

"Okay." Peter cleared his throat, then cleared it again, obviously trying to keep his voice level. "I get it. Definitely super unprofessional of me to try and date someone I'm trying to help, you're right. Definitely seems like you're just a project and no one wants to feel like that. You're doing the right thing, pulling the plug before this turned into anything else." 

"I--" Wade clenched his fists and tried not to scream.. "Yeah. That's right." 

"That's right." Peter repeated quietly, and then in a more formal tone. "I um-- well for professional reasons, I think I'm going to have to refer you to one of my colleagues for any future appointments." 

"Sounds about right." Wade said dully, the flash of anger fading until nothing was left but a bitter aftertaste. He'd gone and ruined everything just because he couldn't keep his shit together long enough for one damn date. What else is knew? "I'd appreciate the referral." 

"It's no problem, I'm happy to help." Peter said in that same stiff way, and then-- "....bye Wade." 

"Bye Pete." 

The phone went dark and Wade threw it across the room, watched it shatter against the wall. 

Outside in the hall, Peter put the flowers, the movie, and the Chinese take out he'd brought along in case Wade wasn't feeling up to going out down at the door, and walked back to the elevator with tears in his eyes. 

********************

Chapter Notes: 

Uh yeah, tbh I 100% forgot about the angst in this fic. I wrote it so long ago on my KoFi that I legit forgot about this part. Oh well! Angst Surprise! 

SAY SOMETHING ABOUT THE CHAPTER!

********************

@ships-galore @ceealaina @izziebladez @cwar1864 @hausoffro @tonystarkisanangel @multishippinglife @girlnic @iam93percentstardust @paranormalmoonlight5 @igotloki @moosette05 @wayward-student-philosopher @kaz-brekkers-gloves @atomicfandombomb @1fuckingshitup69 @agentlokii @livewire28 @tulipsnbigcats @kimstark @alex-stark-rogers @bibbarnes @heeeyitskay @goindownshipping @quietgayguy @nanita90a @justaniche 

@chiby-chan @thanossucks @i-am-worth-it-25 @dan4thefam

#ncts fics #spideypool

[all-things-skam]

Skater boys | VDS

Jens let out a frustrated groan as he got up from the ground, having fallen and failed yet again. He had spent the past two days at the skatepark, trying to do this damn trick and he was very annoyed at himself for still not succeeding.

Usually, Jens was able to learn and master a new trick under a day, but this one was a hard one and he was struggling. He had watched many videos of tutorials and tips on YouTube last night - which made the failure even more frustrating.

Why couldn't he get it right?

Robbe and Aaron had left over an hour ago, having plans with their significant others for the evening and Moyo had gotten a call from his mom, forcing him to leave too...which left Jens on his own.

He didn’t mind though. If anything, being on his own gave him more time to concentrate on his technique and less wasting time chatting with his friends. He loved the boys, but, everytime they come here, they end up spending more time sitting on the grass than going on the ramps.

Determined to get this trick right, Jens pushed himself forward, rolling on the skateground. He was about to jump and make his skateboard flip on itself when he saw another skater coming in the other direction, destined to collide right into him. Immediately, Jens attempted to turn and go the other way to avoid the boy in the pink sweatshirt, but he and Jens got the same idea and he ran right into Jens, causing him to fly off his skateboard.

Shit.

Jens' eyes widened and he ran over to the skater - who was most likely hurt from the fall. ''Shit. I am so sorry. Are you okay?'' he asked, crouching down next to the curly haired brunet.

The boy didn't respond at first, hissing in pain on the ground as he held his arm. Jens also noticed blood dribbling from his chin and onto his sweatshirt. Nice one, Jens...

''I'll live,’’ the brunet said, looking up and shining a set of bright blue eyes. ''My arm hurts like a bitch though.''

Jens wanted to apologize again, but he was too busy staring at the boy. Why did he have to run into someone so cute? Stop, Jens told himself. It’s not the time to flirt. ‘’You’re bleeding,’’ he ended up saying, nodding at the boy’s chin.

Frowning, the injured skater brought a hand over his chin, grimacing as he felt something wet on his fingers. ‘’Thanks for disfiguring me…’’

‘’What? You’re the one who ran into me!’’ Jens defended.

‘’What’s your name?’’

‘’Jens.’’

‘’Well, Jens. Expect a letter from my lawyers. Ruining my face has a price.’’

Panic flashed on the raven haired boy’s face. ‘’Your lawyers?!’’ he repeated. ‘’It was an accident. I tried to turn the other way to avoid running into you but it seems like you had the same idea and-’’

Seeing the panicked look on Jens’ face, the brunet started laughing only to hiss in pain a second later due to the wound on his chin. ‘’I’m joking.’’

Jens let out a sigh of relief. ‘’Fuck. I thought you were serious for a second. I can’t afford new wheels for my skateboard, let alone pay someone’s medical bill.’’ He laughed, joining Lucas.

‘’I’m Lucas.’’

‘’Jens. But I've already told you that…’’ Jens scratched the back of his neck, feeling like an idiot. It wasn't him to lose his cool - and brain - in front of people. He usually was a natural flirt and so smooth. What was going on? ‘’Erm, again, I am so sorry. I should’ve looked where I was going- Do you think it’s broken? Your arm.’’

Lucas shook his head. ‘’It hurts. But not like a broken bone.’’

‘’Good. I would’ve felt so bad if it was.’’

With Jens’ help, Lucas stood. He would’ve been capable of standing up on his own, but, with one hand, it would’ve been a little more difficult.

‘’I should get home and get this cleaned up,’’ Lucas said, using his foot to grab his skateboard. Although it didn’t look like his chin needed stitches, the concrete he fell on was dirty and infection could catch into the injury.

‘’Are you sure you don’t need to go to the hospital?’’

‘’No. My mom has everything at home. I’ll be fine.’’

‘’Okay. Good night, then.’’

‘’Good night.’’ A smirk formed on Lucas’ lips. ‘’Hopefully, next time I’ll come here you’ll have mastered your new trick and won’t run into me again.’’

#van der stoffels #VDS #lucas van der heijden #jens stoffels #skam nl #wtfock #vds fic

[utterlyinevitable]

The Conference (Part 5)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Paring: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Rebecca Lao) Word Count: 2.9k Rating: T+ Warning: Some cursing  Summary: Rebecca reminisces about the night she finally pushed Ethan away. 

Author’s Note: ngl the last part with the ryan arc was 100% self indulgent. it was also the first thing i wrote and built the series around. have ya ever had a friend/lover/someone you never got a proper goodbye with and carried with you everything you wish you’d said? yeah. that’s what that was. it also is the perfect contrast to mc x ethan’s relationship.

Taglist: @ohchoices @dulceghernandez @aylamwrites @binny1985 @ramseysno1rookie @interobanginyourmom @queencarb @imactuallytheceoofthecompany @rookiefromedenbrook @eramsey28 @choicesficwriterscreations @heauxplesslydevoted @schnitzelbutterfingers @purpledragonturtles @ramseyandrys​ @ermidc @mrsdrakewalkerblog

________________________________________

I finally walked into the foreign and dimly lit tavern after wasting the beginning hours of my day off scrolling through Bumble, scouring the app for a good distraction. Eventually I found one - a legal assistant named Cameron. He was cute and his choice of profession gave me the feeling he could carry an intelligent conversation with minimal sexual advances. His tone was friendly enough and a little awkward at times but harmless. We messaged back and forth for like an hour and a half before agreeing to a date across town. 

I made sure to put on my best face, watching youtube tutorials for the perfect date night eye to accompany my black cap sleeved maxi dress - you know that one with the high slit. A little bit of sultry but not enough to give him the assumption he could take me home. 

I’d never been to The Happenstance tavern before. Hell, I barely had any time to explore parts of the city that weren’t directly surrounding Edenbrook. I was pumped with adrenaline for my first actual date in god knows how long. Thus for once in my life I was fifteen minutes early and decided to sit at the bar to calm my nerves. 

I’m meeting a stranger I’ve had half a conversation with an hour ago! In a part of the city I’ve never been to! What am I doing!? 

I didn’t even have a chance to flag down the bartender before my name was called over my shoulder. 

“Rebecca,” my name fell expertly off his lips and I turned towards the velvety voice fully thinking my date was nervous enough to arrive early too.

There he was, only a footfall away. My eyes quickly and involuntarily trailed over him. His slate gray slimming slacks elongating his legs and outlining the curvature of his manhood, a navy blue polo tucked in with the two top buttons undone and form fitting to hide the taut muscles underneath but accentuating the uncertain look in his eyes. 

The hair stood at the back of my neck and I swear goosebumps coated my skin. 

Nope. No. Nope!

Immediately I turned right back around on my stool. 

Not happening! 

“What are you doing here?” he asked, taking the empty seat and motioning to the bartender for two more of whatever he had earlier. 

I had been ignoring Ethan, as best I could given our close workplace dynamic. We’d only talk about patients and pertinent information to the caseload. No hello’s, how are yous or see you tomorrows. Nope. Those little accolades were reserved for friends - someone you actually give a damn about. 

It had been nearly twelve weeks since we spent that last night of heated passion in my apartment; 12 weeks since I thought it was the start of something new, the start of us. As surely as he promised me we would make a future work, he took it all right back. Running all the way to the fucking Amazon. But I forgave him the moment he came back and our eyes locked in the beer garden of Donohue’s. I trusted him above all else - his reason for leaving was probably justified. Oh how wrong I was. I kissed him and he - he did nothing. He reset us without my knowledge. He made the executive decision for my heart. 

That was the final straw. 

He couldn’t keep toying with me and my emotions. No. No more push and pull. That’s not a lover that’s… that’s... I’m not quite sure what that was but it certainly isn’t the actions of a respected partner. He knew where I stood and I needed to take my own stand - to continue living my life as if I never experienced him. 

I chose to push him away. 

To move on from chasing the notion of wholly and completely loving The Ethan Ramsey. Finally. 

“If you must know, I have a date,” I said with the most nonchalant malice I could muster.  

There was a thick and uncomfortable silence taking up the small foot of space between our seats. 

I was staring dead ahead at the bottles meticulously placed behind the bar but out the corner of my eye I could see Ethan’s eyes fell from me to the two tumblers now sitting in front of us. 

I reached out for my drink, letting the cold glass soothe my boiling blood. “At least someone wants to date me.” I muttered it mostly to myself, but secretly hoping the words would hit him where it hurts the most. 

Take the hint and leave, Ethan.  

His voice was even and the words melted off his tongue like butter, “It has nothing to do with want, you know that.” It was a truth he came to know. 

My eyes now fixated on the decorative mirror behind the bar as I took a drag of the scotch, hoping to take a peek at how my words affected him. With a thick roll of my eyes I shrugged, “Want, can’t, what’s the difference?” 

“The difference is your professional development and our jobs,” his voice was straight as he repeated his same rationale over and over again. “Once you’re an attending -” 

That’s a new additive. What -? 

The last words took me by surprise. He’d never added them into the mix of rejections before - he never added a glimmer of hope into the mix before… 

Don’t let him suck you back in, Bec. 

I shook my head dismissively to myself. “You’ll find other excuses to push me away.” I brought the liquid to my lips as I took a moment to let myself turn enough to see his full body language. He was at the edge of his seat, body angled towards me, one arm leaning on the bar and the other tightly gripping his thigh, his scotch untouched and forgotten. An onlooker would assume he was a casual man but to me he looked distraught; the careful ridges in his daily features had fallen.  

Good. 

My glass hovered just above my lips and I could feel the heat from Ethan’s gaze boring into my cheek. With a little bit of courage and a sly smirk I added, “Either way you’ve made your choice and I'm moving on, don’t worry.”  

I checked the time on my phone, downed the rest of the scotch in my glass and slipped off the stool gathering my things into my bag, preparing to head to the back where I agreed to meet Cameron at a reserved table.  

My feet fled all of two steps before there was pressure on my forearm grounding me back towards the bar. I whipped around to finally see him face to face, my heels bringing me to his level. 

We were close. Much too close. In the simplest of movements his body could be flush against mine. 

Stop, Rebecca, don't go there. Don’t think about it - don’t think about his lips or… 

I was acutely aware of his firm yet gentle hold. His shoulders once stiff and rigid fell with vulnerability. His soft and supple lips were parted and begging to be bitten.

Pull yourself together, woman! 

 “Rookie,” his grip on the back of my arm tightened, lighting every nerve in my body on fire. “Rebecca,” he breathed, “Please.” Ethan’s stormy blue eyes were pleading, conveying all he wished he had the strength to say.  

I tried to coax it out of him, “Say it.”

“I -”

Even now. Even with me visibly moving to put us in the past like he instructed and the shattered heart he must have had, he doesn’t have the balls to tell me. 

If he can’t say it he can’t have me.  

“Say it and I’ll stop,” I taunted. “I’ll squash this right now.”

Our eyes locked in showdown. Enraged brown overtaking conflicted icy blue. Standing my ground with a tightened jaw I internally gave him just three seconds before I pulled away once and for all. 

Three... 

His grip on my arm loosened. 

Two... 

His eyes squeezed closed and he shook his head.  

O- 

I was being pulled towards the exit by my hand. 

“Lets go,” Ethan said gruffly as he laced out fingers together in a tight hold.   

My heart fluttered, Good enough.

I wish I was stronger. God, do I wish I was strong enough to pull away from the black hole that is Ethan Ramsey but I couldn’t. His gravitational pull was too strong. I was and will forever be sucked in. I had a probably perfectly nice boy waiting for me in the other room with a promise of mutual affection. And what did I do? 

I got into Ethan’s car. 

On the drive we sat in silence, Ethan’s hand never freeing mine except to start the car. The purple and pink evening Boston sky passed by the window. I smiled at the people out the window who were still going about their day and, for the first time in months, I was content. Content with my feelings that never seemed to fade away no matter how hard I tried. Content that he feels the same way. Content that this is an actionable promise that we can be something. 

I noticed Edenbrook pass in the distance. My eyebrows furrowed as I realized we were getting further from his apartment complex. The other all-too-familiar street now coming into view.

“Ethan, what the fuck. You’re taking me home?” 

He said nothing.

“I thought…” I trailed off, mentally chastising myself for thinking he’d actually give in and let ourselves be happy. I huffed, “So I can’t have fun and I can’t have you. That seems fair…” I tried to free my hand but he held onto me tighter.  

A few moments of time passed in the dead silence of his car. Ethan was focused on the road ahead and I was trapped in limbo. Again.  

“Are you gonna say anything?” I bit, clearly needing an explanation for this round of betrayal.   

He opened his mouth slightly but nothing came out. My unencumbered rage started bubbling over like an active volcano. 

WHAT THE FUCK!!!

“Let me out, Ethan.” I said sternly and yanked my hand out of his. His hand now left palm up on the center console as he kept driving. 

And he wasn’t slowing down. 

I rose my voice through gritted teeth, “Let me out of the fucking car right now.” 

Still the side streets passed behind us at a steady pace. Surely he was ignoring me. 

My red hot anger reached my ears when I yelled, “Doctor! Ramsey!” 

Ethan jumped bringing both hands securely on the steering wheel. Within thirty seconds he pulled the car over. Panic set in and I needed to use all my strength to control my breathing. 

Not again. He’s not doing this to me again.  

As soon as the car stopped at the curb I unbuckled my seat-belt.

Still staring out the windshield and white knuckles gripping the wheel he begged, “Please let me get you home safely.” 

I scoffed, “I can take care of myself.” 

What the fuck does he want from me? 

He pinched the bridge of his nose as he sighed, “I know.”

I looked over at him completely dumbfounded. If we weren’t going to be anything he should just let me move the hell on.  

“I’m not your responsibility,” I said honestly through my rage as I moved to get out of the car. “I know deep down you want to help but you’re not. You’re making things worse.” I looked over at him. His fingers left his nose and he started to sit up straighter at my words. “You - You…” 

I wanted to tell him he’s broken my heart over and over again. I wanted to tell him how much I missed him and that if he just promised me we’d give us a proper try I’d forgive him. But I didn’t, because saying those words out loud wouldn’t change a thing. Everything with Ethan was inevitably complicated. 

He looked over at me for the first time since the tavern. The whites of his eyes were starting to go red and my chest began to ache at the sight. He shakily asked, “I… what?” 

Why do you keep doing this to yourself? 

“Nothing. It doesn’t matter.” Furiously I pulled the door handle and jumped out of the car as best as my dress would allow. The air in the car was suffocating. 

Behind me I heard the car shut off and a loud slam of the door. There were two beeps alerting me that Ethan did indeed leave his car in the no parking zone. Heavy footfalls caught up to me on the sidewalk accompanied by the uneven huffs of breath from the brisk jog. 

“Let me walk with you. Please.” 

We were only a 10 minutes walk away from my place. As mad as I was at Ethan for the false pretenses, I was angrier at myself for falling for it. For letting him have me unconditionally. The thought of going through this same old cycle with him again and again made me nauseous.  

I can’t do this anymore. 

“Stop,” we both ceased our movements at my definitive tone. Turning to Ethan I saw the storm brewing within. Frankly, I didn’t give a damn. “You’re not listening to me.” 

His eyes widened like that of a scolded child. 

My next words were frank and to the point, “I cannot do this anymore. You cannot turn up and pretend you care when it’s convenient for you.”  

“I do -”  

“No.” I shook my head. “You’re self-serving,” the words fell quickly off my expert lips. “Choose me or lose me, Ramsey. You don’t get both.” 

I paused my rant for a brief second expecting the rebuttal that never came. 

“I’m confused enough as it is,” I continued. “Jus - Just get back in your car and find me when you figure your shit out.” I bit my lip before harshly saying, “I’ll be fine without you.”  

There on the narrow street on a Tuesday evening in Boston my chest tightened as I took one final look at the man I once trusted above all else. His hair windswept, cheeks flush, shoulders slumped in defeat and...

His hand twitched at his side beginning to reach out for mine. But I was quicker on my heels, turning around and storming off.

The last thing I heard as I sauntered off with a heavy heart was the unlocking of a car.  

“Hey, I thought you had a date tonight?” Sienna asked from the kitchen when she saw me cross the threshold of our apartment. 

“It didn’t happen,” I said flatly.   

“Oh no!” My dearest friend started moving around the kitchen, pulling out all the comfort food we had on tap - a pint of ice cream, cookies she had made earlier that evening, a bag of popcorn - all because she thought I was stood up. 

“I…” Fuck, how do I tell her? “didn’t make it.”  

Sienna stopped in her tracks and her light brown eyes looked up in confusion, “Huh?”  

I shouldn’t feel guilty but I do. Sienna’s the only person who would understand, she did catch him sneaking out of my room that last morning. She’s also the only person whose opinion matters most to me. My stomach tied in knots as I sighed, “Ethan…” 

“What!” she practically shouted. Luckily the others were in their rooms for the night otherwise it would have been a very awkward conversation between us. Having to tell Aurora about Ethan is another certain kind of hell I’d rather not deal with any time soon.   

“He was at the bar,” I began to explain in complete exasperation. “Of course he was at the bar, of all the bars in Boston he had to choose this one tonight.” I threw my hands in the air for dramatic effect. The irony isn’t lost on me; I agreed to The Happenstance because I knew I wouldn’t run into anyone I know and yet the one person I absolutely never would have wanted to see was already there. “He stopped me before I could meet the guy.”  

There was a hopeful gleam in Sienna’s eyes, “And?”  

“And he had the audacity to drive me home.” I made a ‘here I am’ motion with my arms. 

“That’s it?” she pouted, obviously wanting this story to have a happy ending.  

I leaned my arms on the counter and rested my head in my hands, trying to rub the evening out of my eyes and the weight of what I’d said finally sinking in. 

“I told him to leave me alone until he got his shit straight. I’m done with him,” my voice cracked at the end and I hoped Sienna didn’t hear it.  

If she did, she didn’t let on because her next question was, “Then… why don’t you call that guy and tell him something came up at the hospital?” 

Why wasn’t I going to call Cameron? Well for starters I was embarrassed for standing him up - no fake medical emergency could blow that over. I also never wanted to set foot in another bar again - Ethan can set claim to every bar in the state for all I care. I don’t want to see him outside of work ever again. 

If you don’t want anything to do with him why do you feel so guilty?  

With a weighted sigh I said, “I think I’m just gonna go to bed.” 

And that’s the story of how I pushed the man I loved away.

___________________

A/N: becca is literally the most unreliable narrator, she’s so problematic 😔 also sorry for this chapter, it’s not the best thing i’ve written :/ fun fact: this scene started out as a one shot called ‘good enough’ 

comment/reblog bc i need the validation

#had mc stand up my actual husband #soz lover #lol #open heart #open heart fanfic #choices open heart #choices fanfic #choices oph2 #ethan x mc #ethan ramsey x mc #ethan ramsey #oph #oph ff #ff

[mewtonian-physics]

i forgot to respond earlier but YES if you feel up to ranking the cases you should! :D

i absolutely feel up to it! okay, let’s go! below, my rankings for all of the ace attorney cases i’ve played so far... please note that these are all subjective opinions and you may highly disagree, but this is how i feel :) please also note that this will contain me crushing hard on a couple of characters but i promise not to get over the top about it.

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney

The First Turnabout -- 2/10 I literally do not care about this one like, at all. I do like having Mia around, hence why it has 2 points instead of 0. But also it’s a Larry case and I really do not like Larry. Plus... everything else. I just don’t like it. (And Phoenix having passed the bar exam but not knowing what a cross-examination is, even if it’s just for tutorial purposes, drives me up the wall.)

Turnabout Sisters -- 6/10 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA [sobs] This case hurts me. It hurts. Both because of the painful loss of sibling rights and because April May exists. Very different types of hurting, but all the same... She’s one of the reasons why this case gets points taken off of it. Another reason is that I’m just not huge on how it progresses; I’m never a fan of when Mia has to come in and be like ‘this is what you need to do!’ I like figuring it out myself, y’know? But also, heyyyyy, introduction to some characters that are very dear to my heart! Edgeworth time! Fantastic!

Turnabout Samurai -- 5/10 I like Will Powers a lot, and I would kill for Cody, and Penny makes me happy because she has the same name as me, and Dee Vasquez... Wow. Wow. She’s really something. But the plot is kind of boring and goes on for too long, Wendy Oldbag makes me want to defenestrate myself (especially when she talks to Edgeworth) and Sal Manella fills me with a murderous rage. So this case only gets a 5/10. It would probably get lower, except I really love Edgeworth realizing what’s going on and starting to help out, and the scene at the end... well. Well. I’m sure I don’t need to elaborate.

Turnabout Goodbyes -- 10/10 Excellent case. Perfect case. Could not think more highly of it. Yes my lifespan is decreased whenever I see Manfred von Karma but it’s okay. I love defending Edgeworth and I love the backstory even though I also hate it, and I love the actual realistic depictions of trauma, and I love cross-examining the parrot, and I love love LOVE the ending, of course, because getting justice has never felt so goddamn satisfying before. Yeah, I think this case is just my absolute favorite (so far).

Rise from the Ashes -- 9/10 This case hurts me deeply for a thousand different reasons. The sibling rights... The REMOVAL of sibling rights... (I cried. I actually cried.) Edgeworth suffering... It’s all so painful but it’s so well-written that it’s okay. Point taken off because the whole rotating evidence thing kind of annoyed me. ‘But isn’t that also a mechanic in the Investigations series?’ Yeah, but it’s okay when Investigations does it. Don’t ask me to elaborate.

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Justice for All

The Lost Turnabout -- 3/10 This case only gets points for Maggey, and also Wellington’s cool ringtone. Oh, and the line about bananas. You know the one. Otherwise, it’s just kind of boring, though I do appreciate that they actually came up with an excuse as to why Phoenix suddenly needs everything explained to him again. Even if that excuse is a bit silly.

Reunion, and Turnabout -- 7/10 It’s not a favorite by any means, but this one is pretty good. Pearl is just baby. The whole Miney sisters thing is deeply upsetting to me, but in a way that’s kind of good. The Hotti Clinic makes me really fucking angry and creeped out, so points taken off for that. Also, Franziska has arrived, and oh boy am I glad to see her!

Turnabout Big Top -- -10000000000000000/10 NO NO NO NO NO. FUCK THIS CASE. I HATE IT SO FUCKING MUCH. I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS ONE. The only good thing in it is how Franziska talks about Miles, because sibling rights are real. But the rest of it? The rest of it can burn.

Farewell, My Turnabout -- 9/10 This is a really good case! I LOVE the twist, I didn’t expect it at all, and it was so cool. I also really like Adrian. Shelly de Killer is pretty cool too. And of course, Edgeworth is back! Hallelujah! Franziska getting shot though... :( And having to go to that damn clinic... :((( Oh and also I love Shoe with every fiber of my being.

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations

Turnabout Memories -- 7/10 Ah, another flashback case, and one that doesn’t absolutely destroy me emotionally! Mia is here! Phoenix Wright as a sick college student with no common sense is here! Dahlia Hawthorne is here! It’s quite a collection of interesting individuals, and on top of that, it’s just a cool case! Even if lovestruck Phoenix makes me feel like hitting someone... Sort of like what it does to Mia... 

The Stolen Turnabout -- 6/10 The case itself isn’t that good, to be honest. But I would kill for Ron and Desiree DeLite. They’re so sweet, and Ron is so funny... On the other hand, though, Luke Atmey can go Zvarri himself. I hated him from the very moment he first appeared. What an annoying, fraudulent ass. Also, Godot was there, and I didn’t like him, either, even though I hadn’t yet seen quite just how bad he can get. It was really nice to see Adrian living her best life, though!

Recipe for Turnabout -- 2/10 I really didn’t like this one... I don’t want to talk about it... I did like Lisa Basil though. Too bad she wasn’t much of a character. Oh, and Viola too. And seeing Maggey again was nice. But those were the only good points in an otherwise horrible case.

Turnabout Beginnings -- 7/10 The case is pretty high quality, but it tormented me. Seeing Edgeworth in that coat... with those sprites, just like von Karma’s... And that one line... I hated every minute of it. It hurt. The only way it could’ve been worse was if von Karma himself had been there, but that gets saved for Investigations. Mia being there again was fun, though. And Dahlia... Wow. Lots going on there. That ending was... a lot. Terry was a creep and I didn’t like him, but watching that... Yeah. Yeah. And Diego did not endear himself to me in the slightest.

Bridge to the Turnabout -- 8/10 Too much Godot. Otherwise, this was a really great case. Playing as Edgeworth was so much fun, and Franziska being there too was incredible, and the whole thing tying up all the loose ends was just... so cool. Admittedly, the case itself made me very sad, but... it was so good. So good. I wanted to kill Godot partway through, though. No one talks to Franziska that way. No one. Plus, his whole stupid attitude about Mia... Yeah, I hated his guts, that’s for sure. It also had the scene that I hate (Phoenix needs to fucking learn what PTSD is or I swear to god) but otherwise, very good case.

Ace Attorney Investigations: Miles Edgeworth

Turnabout Visitor -- 5/10 HELLOOOOOO I was so excited to finally play these games that the whole case is a bit of a blur, but I do remember not really finding it that interesting outside of the whole rush of ‘FUCK YEAH I’M PLAYING INVESTIGATIONS’. Jacques annoyed me. But it’s Investigations. Investigations is cool.

Turnabout Airlines -- 7/10 Okay, first of all, Edgeworth hiding Steel Samurai stuff in a law book is genuinely just the funniest thing ever. But this case was pretty fun! I love that Franziska’s working with Interpol now, good for her! The characters were pretty cool (I really liked Cammy) and I thought a lot of it was pretty funny, too.

The Kidnapped Turnabout -- 6/10 The only reason this gets 6 points is because it introduced Kay Faraday, who is my chaos child that I love dearly, and also Shi-Long Lang, who I have a very complicated relationship with. It switches from love to hate frequently. It also introduced their totally epic theme songs, one of which is now my morning alarm. Otherwise, I really don’t like it that much. The case goes on for too long, and a lot of the characters are pretty annoying. I really hate Lance. I feel bad for Lauren, though. Ernest... Ugh. Ugh. The man makes me want to break things. Every time he mentions von Karma, he inevitably says something that makes my blood boil. And it brings back Wendy Oldbag, which is always bad news, and she was so fucking creepy, and... yeah. I enjoyed seeing Ema again, though! She seemed to be living her best life :)

Turnabout Reminiscence -- 9/10 This case had too much von Karma in it, and the fact that he went and called Edgeworth worthless right to his face made me so angry and upset... But! It is still a very good case! I really like Detective Badd, and Calisto... Calisto is very pretty and fun, but... yeah. Also! Baby Kay! Baby Kay is everything! And the sibling rights, they were everywhere! The case was just full of them! I love Miles and Franziska bickering like regular siblings. I love the scene with the Swiss rolls. I love Franziska getting between him and her dad. Sibling rights are so real.

Turnabout Ablaze -- 6/10 This case was pretty eventful. Not a favorite by any means, but still good. I thought it was a little too long, though, and the ending just really felt like it was dragging out too much. It got to the point that I wasn’t even fired up anymore, I was just kind of trying to get it all over with. Also, whether he meant it or not, Lang accusing Franziska of murder made me mad. But some of the twists were cool, even if I figured out most of them ahead of time... Also, Edgeworth getting really mad about Larry playing the Steel Samurai was hilarious, in a mean way. I felt a little bit bad for laughing.

Ace Attorney Investigations: Miles Edgeworth: Prosecutor’s Path

Turnabout Target -- 4/10 This one was kinda boring, to be honest. I liked seeing Shelly de Killer again, though, with his matching ice cream cone. And I liked Nicole. (I bet I know who her first mentor was...)

The Imprisoned Turnabout -- 5/10 This one also kinda bored me, unfortunately. Raymond ticked me off from basically the moment he walked onscreen, because sure, let’s blame Edgeworth for [checks notes] ah yes, being manipulated by Manfred von Karma since he was nine. Let’s do that. Nothing wrong with that at all. /dripping sarcasm Sebastian also ticked me off at first, but I’m warming up to him. Also, I was in love at first sight with Justine Courtney. [heart eyes] I am not embarrassed in the slightest to admit to it. She is amazing. Simon is really funny and I think it would’ve been hilarious if he was actually evil, but he was innocent, so... My blood ran cold when I found out the Berry Big Circus was involved, but thank god, it was only Regina. No Franziska yet. I’m really hoping Franziska will show up.

The Inherited Turnabout -- 8/10 I haven’t finished this one yet, but so far, I’ve been enjoying it, even if it torments me with sadness and anger. Once again, von Karma shortens my lifespan, but Gregory Edgeworth lengthens it. (I think it’s really funny that they got ProZD to voice him.) Raymond... I still don’t like Raymond. Though his eating the paper is funny. Also! Also! Katherine Hall! This game introduced two women in a row that I have absolutely fallen for, and I have zero complaints about this. They are incredible. Sebastian is really funny in this one and like I said I am really warming up to him. Yeah. That’s all I really have to say so far. Still no sign of Franziska...

I’m definitely excited to see where the other cases in this game will take me, and after that it will be time for Apollo Justice! I am looking forward to finally meeting the famous Klavier Gavin... But I am not at all looking forward to meeting Kristoph... Oh, well. I’ll live. Probably.

Thank you for reading all of this, haha! I have a lot of thoughts... Many thoughts head full (of Ace Attorney).

#ask #anon #kris don't look #character hate #Anonymous

[iguessishouldbethankful]

Sly Cooper 1 Review:

As in, I recently completed the game and since I was asked to, I will give my review on it. I’m a little nervous because this is the first time I’m doing this, so hopefully I’ll get this right.

KEEP IN MIND: I did not grow up with this series, and I am going in after @oroanillado gifted me the entire series for the PS3. I am a new fan who basically grew up on Nintendo products, so my views might come off differently.

ALSO: SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Onto the review.

0. Initial Reaction:::::::::::::::::::::::::

I was pretty surprised how the game collection required no download or installation. So that was a good little bonus as I could immediately sit down and play it without much of a wait. As for the starting point on top of the roof... lemmie say that Sly is adorable at first glance. His movements are fluid and it’s very satisfying to control him--especially the fact that he has a bass sound to his steps that is beyond addictive. I love it.

Not to mention the music is nice. Not exactly as memorable, but I can listen to it and it does give the area a feel.

And then Bentley opened his mouth. Whew boy. Okay. Rok heard my live commentary every time he opened his mouth, so it’ll be a theme. It wasn’t that bad at first though so it’s mostly me wanting to explore the Police Station. It’s mostly a tutorial level so it’s nothing impressive, just giving the feels.

When Carmelita showed up, like expected, I was stunned by two things: she owns an extra fancy taser gun, and that slow as fuck taser gun is able to cause the destruction of public and private property as a massive scale. Ma’am, can we talk? Can you not blow up the cars?? LADY-

As for the comic style animation? Yes, perfect. I was looking forward to it and was not disappointed. I love the cartoony look it gives to the whole world. Which is something else I noticed--the feel and look of the game is very much like the love child of Banjo Kazooie and Psychonauts. The colors and collectathon.

Also the character motivations for Sly, Bentley and Murray are believable. All are orphans, and Sly saw his family get killed but the bad guys and the family book of thieves stolen. Carmelita? Eh, wish I had more context to her but good cop trying to catch the robber is good enough.

Note: I had no idea Carmelita was actually someone that worked for Interpol. My dumbass thought she was just a French cop. The more you know.

As for the hub safehouse area, it’s simple and direct to the point.

Okay. We good? Now onto the levels.

1. Tide of Terror:::::::::::::::::::

Sly dies in one shot.

Sly dies in one shot.

Sly dies in one shot.

No. This was okay. I was determined to find out how I could get around this. I explored the initial open area, collecting the coins and trying to get the bottles because I knew that the point of the games was to collect all pages, right? So I needed the bottles to get the clues so Bentley could give me the code. Thing is, I ran into a few problems on the get go. BESIDES SLY BEING A ONE HIT WONDERBOY.

I didn’t know I could pimp whack enemies with the cane. So I see this walrus looking mofo just hammering away on a boat and I’m like... How do I not aggro this dude. Keep to myself, reach areas I new I could jump to, and... OH FUCK THERE ARE BOTTLES ON THAT BOAT GOD DAMN IT! Fine. Let’s sneak in. By sneak I mean run around the walrus and realize that the guy just sees me and hammers harder. What? Okay then he doesn’t chase me. Get the bottles, realize after 5 minutes that Sly’s pimp ass cane can in fact obliterate the ship’s pole to get the last bottle, before trying to confront the walrus.

So I died the first time. Then I smacked him. You know, for a one hit wonder as Sly is, I appreciate that the enemies are the same as well. That balanced everything out and not made it a colorful furry version of Dark Souls. So off I go. Up the ladder and jumping right into the second area where there are search lights. I’m like okay, let me go around these and--

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE ROSE BUSH KILLED SLY?!

GOD DAMN IT!!

Yes, a lot of this happened. It has been a while since I played a colorful game like this and I a lot of this is simple designing that is obvious, but I am also someone that enjoys finding other ways to get around them. So many choices in the game seems nonsensical. A raccoon unable to brush by some thorn bushes was rather hilarious. I was basically fussing at full volume while Rok was laughing at me. Which was good, I meant to be hilarious.

I discovered the wonders that were the search lights and that they are easily turned off in the small sections. That I could in fact dodge most attacks from the minor enemy characters. Realized that this damn raccoon cannot swim to save his damn life. LITERALLY.

kjsdbkjsd And then I realized that I was missing quite a few bottles once I got to the end. I was frustrated. I wanted to get them all already. So I went back and tried figuring out how to get them and I SWEAR TO GOD I CANNOT EVEN LOOK AT THE SAFE WITHOUT BENTLEY GOING “YOU DON’T HAVE THE BOTTLES NEEDED TO OPEN IT U-”

Bro. Bro I know. Bro please.

Shut the fuck up.

Got the bottles and moved on. Found out that I absolutely adore Sly being in a barrel and wanted to take that barrel with me everywhere but I couldn’t. Realized that Sly puts come paper cuts outs of his emblem in opened up safes and--can we talk about this? Does Sly just sit in his room with colored craft paper and cuts these out every night? Does he redo them if one comes out funky? Does he get glittery paper or is it like the kiddy kind? Does he do them in the van? Is it with scissors or an x-acto knife?! How do you make these bro you don’t simply walk into a FedEx’s Kinkos to print these out!

Anyway, I’m learning more tricks as I go along, getting all of the keys and bottles and I do go back to each stage to get all of the damn bottles because I am not leaving one behind because I really want all of the pages. I am also seeing all of the death animations Sly does and honestly, the humor in each of them is not lost on me at all. I adore them. The first time I saw him just realizing he’s gonna fall to his death and he just-

I busted laughing so hard and Rok got to hear me lmao oh my god-- But for real, most of his death animations are strangely adorable in my opinion. Especially when he just falls and his little leg twitches. They never made animations like that for other games I played so far (not even for Banjo Kazooie). And the lightness of everything makes it less frustration in my opinion. As though I had no problem if Sly died along the way. Whereas I would get way more frustrated with how Mario or Banjo would die.

Anyway those are my tidbits. But lemmie tell you something.Once I got to the last stage where I needed to get the 7 keys to access the final boss? There’s a treasure chest with crabs mini games.

FUCK. THAT. GAME.

The only reason I got through it was because I’m stubborn and I distracted my frustrations in my chat with Rok as I had this damn raccoon swim around in a submarine, killing about 100 crustaceans just for 40 chests!! 40! Not a normal number like 20 or 25. No. 40. That drove me nuts for some reason.

Anyway, finally got to the final boss after I collected all the horseshoes and lives around the main hub of the level, and then yeeted Sly from the canon ALA Wind Waker style.

Raleigh is freaking gross. Not in voice, but his animation made me feel really nasty with looking at him, which in my opinion was a good visual design and motivator to get rid of him faster. It was also easy to sort of find out what the boss fight was requiring from me in the end--making it so much easier as well. I guess for a kid it’s a bit more difficult and I can understand that. I just enjoyed the fights for having a repetitive nature that was satisfying. Like even if I died many times, the game didn’t throw me all the way out of the level at all. It restarted the fight from the beginning and that, to me, was a good way to introduce me to the entire function of a Sly Cooper 1 boss fight.

I felt happy when I defeated Raleigh. And of course, Sly isn’t a “killer” so froggo dude is still alive, just in prison after “HOT LATIN FOX LADY” caught him. Of course. Can someone tell me where Carmelita is from? Is she Spanish or Mexican or..? Like was that defined by the games or was it thrown up in the air?

Anyway, onto the next level.

2. Sunset Snake Eyes:::::::::::::::::::::

Lemmie just say that I actually enjoyed Mugshot’s backstory? It made me feel really sympathetic towards him in a way.... Despite him being a murderer but you know. It was a nice touch.

Okay so, are any of you familiar with the whole “Mickey Mouse is taking his dog Pluto for a walk” dilemma? Well, I had a moment like that as well in this section. Why? Because Mugshot has feral dogs all over his turf and that messes me up a lot for some reason. Like I always wondered how, evolutionary wise, can an anthro dog and a feral dog look so similar? I had a moment like that as well when reading Farewell, Beloved Falco. There was a feral pig in that comic and it bother the fuck out of me. But it didn’t impede me from playing the game.

The look was very much classical American desert wasteland in the middle of nowhere. Possibly southwest USA if I were to guess, and I liked the feel of the casinos and run down RVs, trailers and cars. However it made me question why this place was a junkyard almost if he kinda has a functioning casino. For Raleigh I could understand because it was a hideout, you do what you can right? Even if you have a fucking floating metal blimp over your hideout, like that won’t catch military attention at all, nooooooo--

But like, an abandoned casino suggests that it was once owned by the mafia or a mob, and just--Okay. Police regulations and gun control. Etc etc, I’m rambling on about things that have nothing to do with the game. Back to the design.

Again, collecting all the bottles like a desperate AA member that needs a hit for old times sake and running back to open up the safe. Can I just say that the names of each Cooper ancestor is rather amusing? Like some have the most dumb but adorable names. Huckleberry Cooper jfc--

And once I got into the main hub, I got my first taste of the “Murray can’t think without his stomach thus gets himself in trouble and needs to race his Moon Rover turned into a Van to win one of the keys” mini game and “Bentley told me I gotta keep you alive as you run through this area full of trigger happy criminals, Murray, plEASE STOP RUNNING IN FRONT OF MY BULLETS MURRAY-” mini game. Nice. Not as bad as the 40 treasure chests crabs.

Also, why would Mugshot or his minions just leave a red sports car running on reverse for days on end?? Anyway.

The inside of the casino was a nice section to play ngl. I enjoyed that a lot. The platforming too, despite some of the bottles being utterly difficult to get without having to die and do the entire section again to get them. And then comes the level when Carmelita decides to destroy private property because she’s after this dumbass raccoon. I wonder how she felt seeing him jump around back and forth breaking bottles and dodging her SLOW AS FUCK TASER GUN.

“Could you stand still?!”

“Nope. Not my fault you couldn’t get a license for a firearm.”

Finally I got to the Mugshot boss fight and like the first one, it was a very satisfying fight. Mugshot had me in stitches because he walked around with his long ass arms instead of his legs at first like lmao! Also once I got to the final third stage, I was all cautious and excite to jump around the wires. Yessss.

Defeated, all bottles collected, Carmelita caught this villain as well, and off we go... stealing shit from the USA before coming back to the Safehouse? Alrighty then.

3. Vicious Voodoo:::::::::::::::

Let me tell you something about myself. I have an intense love for Voodoo in video games. Started with Gabriel Knight: Sins of the Father, Princess and the Frog and I had an intense call back to one of the swamp areas of Banjo Kazooie in this level.

So basically, this is my favorite level.

I think it’s also the level where I argued the most with Bentley as well. Or at least the second one because, since the very first game, he keeps repeating the same obvious commands all the time with a constant reminder of press the O button. Sly? Sly?? SLY! PRESS THE O BUTTON! Bentley? You’re cute, but you gotta stop my dude.

The sliding effect on the long branches was a lot of fun, the tree enemies that had more than one hit kills were also satisfying to beat the shit out of. I also enjoyed the general murky color of the level in general. Just the spooky was definitely my aesthetic. You know what wasn’t my aesthetic? The first mini game I ran into, which was the candle mini game where Bentley would repeat himself all the time right at the start of if you had to restart the level. I muted the entire thing and had Sly mindlessly killing the fishes to turn on the candles while blabbing to Rok on the phone so it was easier for me not to get nervous about the time limit or the amount of candles I had to turn on. It was the same thing with the Chicken Gumbo mini game, but I didn’t mute that one. Because Bentley stayed quiet.

Also, @oroanillado​ is the biggest troll. I was on the beast section of the game and they did not describe to me what it was like. So I’m honestly not expecting much at all, just wanted to grab my bottles and go. Once I’m halfway though, and I already saw the water moving around I’m having Amnesia the Dark Descent flashbacks like OH SHIT OH FUK O Shi- But no. No. What got to me was... This intensely huge serpent coming out of the water and chasing me and my camera kept pointing BACK instead of pointing forward so I could navigate Sly out of that mess while also getting the fucking bottles along the way!!

I was shrieking!! I have an acute fear of things that are larger than normal (it’s connected to my Agoraphobia). I have that with whales and sharks and fish, so I usually avoid big mobs if possible in any game. Yes, including the 3 mythical dragons from Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. @thekursedone-lylat​ was present when I was freaking out about saving Naydra and how huge it was. But at the same time I have a big fear of these sorts of creatures, I was laughing and cursing at the end of the level because honestly, Rok was having a good time and so was I.

Oh yes, also the other mini game where I had to navigate the same speed boat thingy and shoot down the on coming ghosts and flaming rocks was pretty annoying until I figured out I needed to destroy the pillars where the ghosts came from. Then it was easy.

But my absolute favorite section of this whole level was the Green Water Full of Body Parts and Bones. Bentley was losing his shit at the beginning of the level and I would accidentally yeet Sly into the water of decomposing bodies like yeah, yeah the turtle won’t like the smell of this. It was just a well designed level, so I had no problems having to redo it to get all the bottles again and again.

Now, the boss fight? I was warned about this ahead of time so I had to unfortunately put Mz. Ruby on mute so I would concentrate on her attacks but apparently they were supposed to go with the rhythm of the song and the Sly Cooper Collection messed that up? I think she was the only Boss I was really wanting to listen to as she talked because she was giving me good “yeah I’m bad, probably not the best one in the group, but I don’t care I’mma own up to it so try to dodge my attacks as best you can” vibes. It was also entertaining to see Sly go Neo with some of the commands.

All bottles collected and onto Winter in China.

4. Fire in the Sky::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Oh hey look, fireworks!

.....oh.

Surprisingly, this entire stage was rather meh to me? It worked like the others, felt like the others, but I really wasn’t as wowed by it. It might also be just the fact that I mostly saw white in general due to the snow, and spent most of my time looking for a few bottles on one section that really irritated me. Like I legitimately got mad in one section and didn’t want to deal with it because of the noises some of the monkeys were making.

This section. I hated it so much because I thought the bottles I was missing were in here and 2 of them were but I needed hints for it. Argh... Everything else in this section was pretty much a blur for me besides the two mini games with Murray, and the one level where Carmlita came back again, destroying more private and ancient property with her taser gun--and the main reason I remember this was because:

Carmelita saying she was going to catch criminal scum Sly and Sly just went “you really need to get woke, I’m not the bad guy here.”

I collected all the bottles but Bentley told me I had to defeat Clockwerk before I could open this damn safe, and it was the only one requiring this!!

Carmelita went down with the dragon statue, into the hypothermia levels of cold water while shaking her fist into the sky.

I will say the part of Sly and Bentley discussing the whole mechanics of Sly taking the rockets into Panda’s lair was pretty funny tho. Just,

Bentley: Hey you might be able to reach the top of the tower before these explode.

Sly: Okay but what if they explode before I get there?

Bentley: Then I guess you’ll blow up into many pieces.

Sly:

As for the Panda King boss fight, it was okay. I just kept running in circles around the arena while approaching the dude. Defeated him and was like okay, I really need to go and defeat Clockwerk now so I can open that safe.

5. The Cold Heart of Hate:::::::::::::::::::

Look.

I get Sly probably weighs next to nothing, Murray, but could you at least break once Sly gets knocked off the top of the van? Or when the rocks are falling down towards us, maybe also step on the breaks so not everyone is being driven to their ultimate death?

No?

Okay.

I will say, I headcanon that both Bentley and Sly were getting an intense case of whiplash when Murray was driving that van around at 120 MPH collecting all 60 computers because... Bentley needed those to hack into something??? It wasn’t as bad as the 40 crabs and treasure chests but man. And then of course there’s the section where, oh surprise surprise, Carmelita is in an obvious trap, slamming her fist on the glass, needing to be saved. Bentley warned Sly it was a trap. But of course Sly is like:

OH THANK GOD THE BARREL IS BACK.

Anyway, obvious trap is an obvious trap. Carm just bitches at Sly right as he gets stuck in the glass chamber and is sprayed with RAID. So Bentley has to save his ass. This is possibly the mini game I dislike the most. I just put Bentley on constantly circling mode as he shot down the targets.I died about 9000 times before I won.

Carmen is all Oh I was wrong about you the whole time Sly!

Sly: Duh.

And off we go to the next section where Sly lost his cane and he needs to recover it with Carm’s help. So I’m controlling Carm’s taser gun. Guess how many times I purposefully killed Sly? Many. For funsies. Because the gun magically got faster once I was behind the trigger.

Next section was the whole climb up the beam tower as it’s being consumed by lava! I very much enjoyed this whole climbing bit. It was fun. Again, died a lot and I actually glitched through the walls because I jumped somewhere I wasn’t supposed to and had to kill Sly along the way. But still very fun.

FINALLY.

CLOCKWERK.

Are we serious? Are we actually serious right now? Clockwerk had absolutely no motivation beyond ultimate hate? WHAT?! That’s just... not a satisfying reason ngl. Anyway, the jetpack flying section was probably the easiest thing ever and I loved it. What I didn’t like was the laser section that came after it... I kept dying. Again. FUCK. THOSE. LASERS.

Clockwerk speaking random little words while malfunctioning was super cute those. I don’t why, but I loved it. I was shrieking by the end of everything though because once I got right at the back end, where I’m supposed to jump on this mad owl, I was not expecting the head to jump on me. HHHHHHH!!!

Anyway, I killed Clockwerk dead. Back into the lava you go. Witnessed Sly give Carmelita the slip of the tongue and handcuffed her onto a railing over an active volcano before yeeting himself. Classy. Then back to his old tricks again with the gang. End credits.

NO WAIT.

The last chest. In the Panda section. Yeah I went back for that and got the extra ending.

0. MY RATING::::::::::::::::::::

Honestly, 8 trashcans out of 10. If Clockwerk actually had a believable motive besides hate, I’d give it a higher rating. But the game is satisfying and I love the mechanics of it.

Bentley just needs to chill the fuck up tho. God.

#sly cooper #sly cooper reviews #peep peep #long post

[dukearchive]

When the Moon Found the Sun

By Skyler Graham

PART I: THE MOON I’ve always been fascinated with lights: Christmas lights, street lights, illuminated advertisements surrounding the skyscrapers of uneasy cities. There is something comforting about these contained fireworks, something calming yet invigorating in sustaining hope in the darkness. This light, however, may also be a destructive force. As my mother grew in her career and my father fell in his, tension in the house became the firecrackers of a once glowing family. No lights, just jolting explosions of anger. I felt my dad giving into his insecurities, allowing his wife’s success to feast on his ego. Yet, rather than establishing a sense of equilibrium, he became the guilty victim of female domination. No job turned into no friends. When you only have one adult to socialize with, conversations turn into arguments.  A joker turns into a hermit.    I spent winter months silencing their screams with a complete infatuation with the fireplace. I focused all of my energy on the flames; if I could match my breath with the rise and fall of each quivering light, perhaps I could stay distracted long enough to forget why I needed a breathing tutorial in the first place.

But the screams only continued. My mom kicked the garage door shut, one hand grasping a cup of ice and the other a bottle of Tito’s. “Don’t worry about it, asshole. Just stay in the house, like you do all day, while I’m out working for this family.” “For this family? You’re never home!” This had become my parents’ daily routine: ignore each other throughout the day, argue about familial obligations and financial irresponsibility, anesthetize the anger with liquor, wake up, and repeat. Wash, rinse, repeat. I distracted myself at school; I focused on wall clocks and bus windows and half-completed math worksheets with lyrics doodled across the page. I stared into spinning washing machines and living room rugs and TV screens and interstate billboards. I stared out the window on every car ride, untouched by the heat rising from arguments at home. When I was sixteen, I glared at the bathroom mirror, finding only the reflection of a reckless dreamer with a warring psyche. My parents were in marital purgatory by this time; they knew the end was approaching, but they were still trapped in the same house by laws and loans and realtors. They were too occupied with hating each other, though, that my reckless bursts of naivety went unchallenged. My worries embraced a pair of scissors and a box of bleach. “Damn,” I whispered. “Now I look like a fucking Wal-Mart brand Kurt Cobain.” It was nearly one in the morning, but I couldn’t sleep. The light of the full moon radiated on the cigarette butts and stolen jewelry resting on my windowsill. There’s an everlasting magic to moonlight; not merely in its aesthetic brilliance, but in the effortless coexistence of the sun and moon. I admired how the sun highlights his lunar partner, allowing her to carry the tides and sustain hope in the darkness. He asks nothing in return. And the moon, shining on my orange-blonde head, willingly hides in the morning and allows the sun to warm the earth; she asks nothing in return. Their sacrifices are not of hopeful reciprocity, but a selfless balance of their earthly children. I lit a white candle and kneeled by my window. “God, or gods, or whatever powers control our universe, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know who I am, or who I’m becoming. I know, I’ve been acting out lately. I guess I’m just confused. But I need some type of balance; I can’t keep pretending like it’s okay — like I’m okay — when I want to be there for my family but I’m always put in the middle and I have no one to talk to and I’m scared of what Mason thinks and—” My mom came in and sat on the edge of my bed, the home of my nightmares and tear-stained pillowcases. Ignored the candle. “I can’t do this anymore, Steph. I can’t — everything I do is for you and your brother. I want to be home with you guys more, I do, but I can’t when he—,” her tears stifled her cries. But it didn’t matter — I knew what she meant. I knew what she felt. I could read her fearful despondency and immediately understand her confusion. How did her marriage end up like this? How could she escape? I didn’t know if my empathy was purely intuition or something greater (or if there’s a difference), but I knew she was desperate for change. I blew out the candle as she shuffled through the doorway. “So Mote It Be.” *** After my dad moved out, my mom introduced me to our next-door neighbor, Mike. He had lived next to us for months, but the only thing I knew about him was that his motorcycle, Jeep, and Mustang were cleaner than his soul. “Hey Mike, I’m Stevie.” A backwards snapback and graying beard looked up from his phone. “Oh, hey — yeah, your mom’s told me all about you. Said you might want to babysit my girls.” Great. This guy has kids? “Uh, sure,” I responded. “How old are they?” “Two and six,” he grumbled. “I love ‘em, but damn, it’s a difficult age.” I awkwardly laughed. “Yeah, just wait until they’re teena-” “Oh I know,” he interrupted. “I got another daughter about your age. We don’t talk much though.” My mom came out and proudly gestured to our backyard. “Look at what Mason did!” The grass was cut, the bushes trimmed, and the dirt stains on the fence were covered with a fresh layer of white paint. “Mike showed him how,” she said. “Mason, of course, complained the whole time.” She crossed her arms and looked away, squinting vaguely at the fruits of a renewed suburban paradise. “He would be used to all this work, you know, if your dad taught him better.” I hated that; the universal “Dad” had turned into “your dad,” as if he was an unknown figure in her life. As if they never met. I don’t know — maybe that was her way of hiding in the flames. *** PART II: THE SUN “Just let me know when you’re coming, and I’ll open the garage.” Mike invited me over that night, offering beer and a backyard bonfire in exchange for some company. My mom and Mike had become good friends, sharing time, vacations, and secrets with each other. My mom was on a business trip that night and unable to console her friend. I, however, was in town, bored, and seventeen without a fake ID. I walked over to his house in the same tan dress and cowgirl boots I wore to a concert that night. He was sitting alone in the backyard staring at tattoos on his wrist. “Annabelle,” it said. Is that the older daughter? One of the younger ones? One of the mothers? What happened between them? I sat down next to him in a plastic lawn chair. “What’s been going on, man?” I knew he needed comfort. But I had to remain cautious. “My friend’s girlfriend has been texting me all night — crying to me, complaining about her boyfriend and all this other shit.” Mike handed me a beer. “I’d love to help her — hell, she’s only nineteen and needs some type of guidance — but I don’t mess with girls in relationships. Not something I’m tryna get involved in.” “Doesn’t it bother you that she’s, ya know, nineteen?” “Age doesn’t bother me — I like younger girls anyway. Once they get to a certain age, women just — aren’t fun anymore. Young girls are exciting, they want to go out, they want to try… new things. After about, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, they’re not interested. They’re not interesting.”

“We just understand each other. We’re going through the same things, we can joke around and go out and talk about anything,” my mom sighed and smiled, then briefly glanced down. “He just doesn’t want a relationship, I guess… but neither do I. We’re just friends. Just friends.”

Mike opened another beer. “Was he at least good in bed?” He was asking about my ex-boyfriend; Mike knew him and watched his minivan creep out of my driveway almost every Friday night that spring. I broke up with him that June after months of frustration with his insecurities manifesting themselves as emotional dependency. I was tired of giving more than having — I didn’t want to take anything, just have: have mutual friends; have kind conversations with each others’ parents; have a reciprocal love. There is magic to mutualism, a feeling that transcends the power derived from systems of domination. I guess some people aren’t prepared for that type of power. It’s easy to succumb to others’ control, and tempting to take that control for yourself. It is grueling, however, to accept the power that lies in its absence. “Honestly, no. It felt like it was always about him; whenever he came, we were done. It felt like my only purpose was to satisfy him. I always just wanted it to be over.” He poured a shot for me. “Don’t worry honey, it won’t always be like that. You just need a man with experience to treat you right. Find an older man, someone who knows what he’s doing.”

“But I trust him. Even if we’re not “dating,” I know I can rely on him. I know he wouldn’t do anything to hurt me or you guys. Yes, he’s tough on your brother, but he’s just trying to teach him. He wants the best for you guys.”

I stared at the bonfire. I could look only at the bonfire. If I looked in his eyes, he would take it as an invitation. He pulled his phone out of his back pocket. “You ever watch porn?” Fuck. “My ex and I, we used to make our own,” he continued. “Wanna see?” I couldn’t see the flames anymore. I felt them rising to my face, but the flood of alcohol suffocated them. I couldn’t say no. It wasn’t really a question to begin with. And he wasn’t doing anything wrong, right? He didn’t touch me or make me do anything, right? Why am I so worried? I thought, I can trust him. I can trust him. Can I trust him? The flames kept growing. I handed back his phone, a drunk half-grin on my face. “Nice. A fine piece of cinema, Mike.” He ignored my sarcasm, as expected. He stood up and motioned toward his bulging crotch. “Look what you did to me, Stevie.” The flames were now in my cheeks and knees and hands and I couldn’t escape. He stumbled toward me. “All this sex talk, you got me feeling different.” I laughed. He didn’t. He looked me up and down, his hands in his pockets. “You know, if you weren’t my neighbors’ daughter, I would so have sex with you right now.”

“So nothing happened?” I asked, “And you guys were staying in the same room?” My mom sighed. “Nope. Nothing on New Years’ either. Whatever.” She stirred her drink. “I just don’t understand — what is it about me? Why don’t guys like me?” I felt her concerns, a nauseating red-green-blue energy pouring from her soul. “Don’t worry about them,” I explained. “Most guys are assholes anyway. You don’t need them.”

I walked back home. It was 7:00 AM. The moon was out of sight, her solar partner taking control. *** “Thanks for hanging with Mike, by the way,” my mom said after she got home. “I know he was feeling down and just wanted someone to talk to.” “Yeah, of course. We had a good time.” Mason looked up. “No kidding, you didn’t come home until five in the morning.” My mom’s eyes went cold. The red-blue aura had returned. “You what? Why? What were you guys doing?” The flames were back. This time, they were ashes swirling in the pit of my stomach. “Nothing, just talking.” “Talking about?” “I know I don’t need them; I’m better off without your dad than I was with him. But it’s still nice to have someone — you know, someone you can trust and talk to without any tension.” I watched my mom’s emotion shift to a pale yellow. She put down her drink and looked at me with hope shining through her eyes. “And I feel like that’s what I have with Mike. I know, we’re not “dating”, but things could turn around.”

I exhaled. “Nothing.” *** “Dinner’s here, just come in when you’re ready,” my mom texted me. I walked over to Mike’s to grab a slice of pizza and leave; I did not want to be back in that house any longer than I needed to. My mom still didn’t know what we talked about — what he talked about — and neither Mike nor I had the heart to tell her.    I walked in to my mom playfully laughing at one of Mike’s jokes. The ashes began swirling. He didn’t care. She didn’t know. I walked in to both of them ignoring my presence, one out of infatuation and the other out of arrogance. Or fear. The flames started rising. No “Hello,” no “How was your day?”, no “Sorry I hit on you despite the fact I’m old enough to be your father and your mom is obviously obsessed with me.” Nothing. The fire kept burning. Mike finally put down his pride long enough to acknowledge me. “Hey Stevie, could you run out to the garage and get me another beer?” The fires are rising higher and higher Uncontained Unrestrained I stomp into the garage. I grudgingly open the fridge and my elbow knocks over his “bar.” The Mustang. There’s vodka and whiskey and cheap mixers all over the hood of that damn Mustang. Maybe if you spent less time worrying about your vehicles, Mike, you could see the truth. You could see what I see. The fires are now swirling, exploding from the inside out. I can feel it in my stomach and chest and hands and feet. I harness it, however, and focus on the car. I focus on the flames. I focus all my energy — all my anger and resentment — on sparking the conveniently flammable coating of his prized possession. I watch the fire rise and fall, then rise again, then spread through the window into the car’s interior. She’s melting, Mike, and you can’t save her. I can’t hear your screams, either, as I am consumed by the flames. Consumed, but in control. Finally taking control of all of my worries, all of the anxieties I hid with bleach and stolen jewelry. I can harness this energy under the guiding moonlight. Some of us can maintain harmony with our souls and our surroundings. And some of us — most of us —  aren't prepared for that type of power.

#fall2020 #prose

[crossingyu]

can i request a yuta smut where he is your brothers best friend and for some reason u hate each other but end up fucking after having a discussion??!!? idk if i made myself clear but if u can, thank you!!

It had been a solid month into your summer vacation and nothing could be more perfect. The sun was out, a breeze always drifted by, and you were spending time with your brother as well.

Both you and Taeyong went to different universities and barely saw each other for more than five days at a time while classes were in session so being able to see him everyday was something that always brought a smile to your face.

The last thirty days had been all smiles and laughter and you were hoping it would be that way for the remaining sixty. However the streak was broken when the doorbell went off.

“Y/N, can you get that?” Taeyong yelled from his room.

“Yeah, I got it!” you quickly made your way to the door, not wanting to keep whoever was out there waiting for too long but when you opened the door, you wished you could’ve closed it just as fast.

“Oh. Hi Yuta” your voice was laced with annoyance as you stepped to the side and let him pass by.

“Well, isn’t it just lovely to see you too Y/N” he forced a smile at you causing you to roll your eyes.

“Taeyong’s in his room. He’ll be out in a second. In the meantime, don’t come near my room” you said and turned around to walk back to your bedroom.

“Please, I don’t want to go to hell that badly” Yuta scoffed as he took a seat down on the couch and you swear you’ve never wanted to yell at him so badly but rather than doing that, you continued your walk and settled on cursing at him under your breath.

“Yuta’s out there” you mumbled to Taeyong when he passed by you in the hallway.

The last thing heard from you was the sound of your door slamming shut.

Taeyong always found you and Yuta’s bickering quite funny. Ever since he introduced you to his best friend, you two immediately didn’t click. It was as if you were polar opposites and you told Taeyong that you “never wanted to see Yuta again” to which his response was that you were being a child.

“Sorry about that” Taeyong laughed as he sat himself down next to his friend.

“Oh don’t worry, I’m used to it” Yuta replied and their laughter shook the house, “You should just give me a key to the place, that way Y/N wouldn’t have to open the door for me when I come over”

“I don’t think that would make your situation any better” Taeyong’s eyesbrows raised at the thought of Yuta coming here at any time and having to hear you two argue over everything.

“Probably not but hey, it’s an option” Yuta joked and the afternoon went by just like that. You were left alone in your room as the two boys conversed outside and occupied themselves with Taeyong’s Nintendo Switch.

It was when Taeyong tapped his phone screen that his eyes widened. “It’s 7PM?! Man, I have to cook dinner tonight. Here, you can play” Taeyong said as he rushed into the kitchen.

After hours of confining yourself to your own room, you ventured to the kitchen. The smell of Taeyong’s food is what attracted you but seeing Yuta made you scrunch up your nose.

“Do you need any help?” you asked your brother and he shook his head as his hand worked on chopping the vegetables.

“No, thanks though. If you could go hang out with our guest I’d appreciate it though” Taeyong couldn’t even hold back his little laugh at his request.

“You’re joking right?” you asked with arms across your chest.

“I mean, I am but I’m also not. Yuta is staying with us for a couple of days so might as well get acquainted with him now” Taeyong said as he dropped the now cut veggies into the pot.

“I’m sorry, what?! Taeyong! You didn’t tell me this!” you whisper yelled.

“It slipped past my mind! Just as you let Yuta’s existence slip past yours when he’s here. Now go play a game with him or something? Please?”

You let out a sigh as you nodded and trudged over to the couch, choosing the spot farthest away from Yuta and he laughed.

“What’s so funny? Are we going to play a match or not” you said and grabbed one of the joycons off the table.

“I just think you’re funny,” Yuta said with a shrug, “and sorry but this isn’t a fighting game. Punch me in real life if you want to but only after you help me catch this Articuno”

“Articuno? I don’t even know how to play this game, Yuta” you told him honestly and he scooted closer to you to give a mini tutorial to you.

“Just click this button on the controller and then since we’re both playing, we have to throw the pokeball at the same time. So on my count, okay?”

You nodded. It was simple enough.

“1, 2, 3!” Yuta called out and swung his controller downwards. However you were a second off and your ball didn’t even end up being thrown.

Yuta let out a huff and scratched the side of his face at your mistake. “Let’s try that again” he said and you did. It was after one more mess up that you finally got it but the Pokémon constantly flew around and without any instructions from Yuta other than his count, you didn’t know which way he swung his remote which was crucial to getting a successful catch.

“My god Y/N, can you not throw it the same way as me?” Yuta groaned out at you.

“Well maybe if you told me which way you threw it, we would’ve caught the damn thing by now!”

“Here, throw it to the right then. One, two, three”

You two have been trying to catch the virtual bird for thirty minutes now and didn’t even come close because for one, Yuta ran out of pokeballs and two, Taeyong called you two for dinner.

You kept quiet throughout the whole thing, still annoyed with how Yuta blamed his loss on you and the two friends conversed as they had earlier.

With dinner finally finished and dishes washed, the three of you flopped onto the couch with tummies full.

“Ah I know! We should watch a movie” Taeyong grinned as he turned on the TV, “how abou-“

He was halfway through his sentence when his phone rang and he picked up. “Oh hey. Sure, yeah I can meet you right now” Taeyong slipped his phone into his pocket as he got up, “Johnny’s car broke down and it’s getting towed so I’m going to go pick him up. Please don’t tear each other’s heads off while I’m gone” he said and the front door shut behind him leaving you and Yuta back in that deafening silence. 

Grabbing your phone, you opened up your social medias in an attempt to do anything but talk to Yuta. It was just as easy to leave but you felt as if you were glued to the couch and someone else’s gaze seemed to be stuck on you too.

Yuta’s body was now turned towards yours and he rested his head in his hand as he looked at you.

“Can I help you with something?” you asked and put your phone down.

“No, nothing in particular. I was just thinking, ‘huh, why doesn’t Y/N like me?’”

“The feeling is mutual” you say as you turn to him and pull a pillow over your lap.

Oh? Does that mean I cross your mind sometimes?” Yuta smirked upon hearing your reply and you don’t know why but your cheeks flushed a pink, rosy hue.

“I could ask the same to you then” 

“You got so shy when I said that but your voice is still so harsh with me”, Yuta pouted and you don’t know how it happened but he was all of a sudden only inches away from you. “you’re breaking my heart” 

“My goal was achieved then?” you said and you both laughed. “You can check one thing off your bucket list now. Want to help me cross something off mine?” 

Taeyong must’ve put something in your food because you found yourself nodding and in the next second, Yuta’s face was leaning in closer to yours until your lips touched. 

Surprisingly, his lips melded with yours in a way that no one else’s had and just as you were about to pull him closer to deepen the kiss, he pulled away, teeth pulling at your lower lip. “Still hate me?”

“Oh, for sure” you said before pulling him in again. With your lips on one another’s it wasn’t as if you could argue but still, you two fought for dominance. It was only when he pulled you into his lap and squeezed your ass that you finally opened your mouth through a moan and let his tongue in. 

“You sound amazing when you’re not giving me attitude, you know that?” 

“Give me a reason to not snap back at you then”

“I’d gladly, just be a good girl and listen then” Yuta said and he lifted you up, relocating the two of you to your room. The door was closed behind you as you were laid down onto the bed and Yuta picked up right where he left off. 

One chaste, sloppy kiss was pressed to your lips and ventured downwards from your jaw to your neck. When he successfully found the sweet spot on your neck, you breathed out his name and this only egged Yuta on. His attack on your neck didn’t end until he saw the pretty splotches on your neck that would be sure to remain until tomorrow. 

“Pretty little thing,” Yuta smiled at his work and moved on to removing your clothing which was easy since you only wore a shirt, shorts and panties, “I think you look even prettier like this too” he licked his lips at the sight of you before removing his clothes as well and leaning down. His arms caged your frame underneath his as he pushed his clothed cock onto your cunt. 

His hips rolled circles onto yours and your essence lubed up his length. “Sweetheart, you’re absolutely soaked for me” Yuta said as he took his length and pushed the tip in and out of you, “do you always get this wet when you think of me? When you yell at me?”

“Shut up” you growled out and he laughed. “Is it that hard to admit the truth?” he asked and pushed his length inside of you. 

Yuta let out a groan at how your walls clenched around him and he stilled inside you, taking in the feeling before rocking his hips back and forth at a pace that had your head spinning. 

“You hate me?” Yuta hummed with a chuckle, “you don’t seem to hate my cock though. I wish you gave me this much love” his voice was laced with fake hurt.

“F-fuck you, Yuta” you said in between pants. 

“Someone is still bratty” he said as he pulled out of you. You were dumb to think that he would stop there.

Instead of laying on your back, you were on all fours, back dipped down as you anticipated for the return of his dick in your cunt. 

Seeing how you kept pushing back into nothing, Yuta took his hand and brought it down upon your ass making you let out a yell. 

Whimpers accompanied your yelps as he continued to spank you. It started at your neck those minutes ago and now your ass was just as marked up as that. The initial pain morphed into pleasure and your legs nearly gave out under you when he delivered the last hit directly to your pussy. 

“Maybe now I can fuck the attitude out of you” Yuta whispered into your ear as his cock entered your hot hole again. Sinful moans were ripped out of your throat and Yuta took the chance to push his fingers into your mouth. 

“Mm” you closed your eyes as you sucked on his fingers and took in this feeling of his length dragging in and out of you. Adjusting his position, he thrusted and his tip hit your g-spot, bringing you closer and closer to your orgasm.

“Be a good girl for once and cum, cum around this cock” he demanded and with his cock moving in and out of you and his words, you did just as he said and came.

Your body would’ve given out if it weren’t for Yuta picking up your hips so he could finish off, his load decorating your insides and dripped out of you when he pulled out. 

With all of his energy drained out of him, he fell down onto the bed and pulled you closer to his body, nuzzling his face into your neck.

“Ew Yuta, you’re gross get off” you pretended to push him away but he kept you in his arms.

“Nice attempt at trying to get me to go away but sorry you’re stuck with me for another three days,” remembering that made you groan and yuta only pushed it, “You have seventy two more hours of either fun or hell, you can pick” 

#i liked how this turned out so hopefully it was a dope read for you! #please feel free to send any feedback in along with requests #lol sorry for my pokemon references #i play on the switch a lot and incorporate it here #also i thought this request was really fun to write so whoever sent it in #thank you! #nct smut #nct127 smut #yuta smut

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #265

“all is fair in love and war, i’m still rotten to the core.”

What's the latest youtube channel you've discovered and binge-watched? Ha, a WoW channel that basically gives advice and tutorials on stuff. She doesn't have many videos, but she's pretty successful already and chill as hell. Kraken Latte. Does it snow where you live? Occasionally. Very rarely does the snow stick, though, because the ground will be too warm. Do you think your hair looks better long or short? Short. Do you look best with or without bangs? Bitch I loved my emo bangs fuck off. Well, they weren't technically bangs, my hair was just parted far to the left. Do you enjoy editing photos on your phone? Well, my phone doesn't have GREAT camera quality, but I usually do some subtle edits if I take a pic on it. What's your favorite thing to do on your phone? Play Pokemon GO REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Which season do you wish would last longer? Shit man, fall. At least here, the phase of colorful leaves is VERY short. Goes from green to totally bare in what feels like just a couple weeks. How many outdoor birthday parties have you had? Hell if I know. How much taller or shorter are you than your mom? We're the same height. Who is your favorite sibling? Lol wow that's mean. Do you have neat handwriting? Yeah. Do you like sushi? I've actually never tried it, but I'm quite certain I wouldn't like it. Have you ever tried seaweed? Actually yes, I believe in the 4th grade? We had I think authentic Japanese (or Chinese, idr) food, and I recall there being seaweed. I didn't like it. The only thing I liked was the white rice, I think. Do you have an actual pig-shaped piggy bank? No, but I think I may have as a kiddo. Did you dream of becoming famous as a kid? No. Have you ever been to a gynecologist? I actually haven't because I've always said I wasn't sexually active (back then it wasn't a conscious lie, I just genuinely didn't realize what we were doing was just shallow sex). I'm absolutely terrified to go anyway because I'm just very very very private about this sort of thing and honestly think I'll have a panic attack when I do have to for the first time anyway. Name three games that you are good at. Shadow of the Colossus, Silent Hill, World of Warcraft. What was your favorite board game as a kid? Ha ha, somehow, it was this shopping game called "Mall Madness." Veeeery unfitting of who I was and what I enjoyed as a kid. Do you get on Facebook every day? Pretty much. Did you watch the Kids Choice Awards when you were a kid? No. What was your favorite girl group when you were growing up? Spice Girls, I think. Do you have memories that still make you cry? Yes. Have you made your own mask to help prevent the spread of the virus? No, considering I don't leave the damn house like ever. Do you know anyone who has the virus? Yes. Not personally, but distantly. Are you proud to be an American? (if applicable) Sometimes. What countries have you visited? I haven't left America. Have you ever had a controlling boyfriend/girlfriend? No. How many true heartbreaks have you had in your lifetime? Romantically, I only consider one to be a *real* heartbreak. Have you ever cut yourself? Yeah. Do you feel like everything is falling apart around you? BOY DO I!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Was your first kiss romantic? Yes. Do you miss any of your exes right now? My PTSD has been awful awful AWFUL the past few days, so yes. A lot. Have you ever overdosed on anything? Yes. What would you say if you found out your last ex was in a relationship? I'd be happy for her of course, but I'd also be very confused. She's made it clear she doesn't believe a relationship is the best idea for her right now. Who was your date to prom? Jason took me to his senior prom, and I took him to mine. Do you still talk to your first love? No, I haven't spoken to him in over three years now. Wow. Whose wedding did you go to first? I don't remember. I'm sure it wasn't the first, but ONE of the earliest that I do remember was when my friend Summer's mom got remarried. He sadly passed away a long while ago though. Are you ashamed of anyone you've dated in the past? Tyler, yes. It was so pointless and a "let's see how this goes" versus a "I really like this guy and really want this relationship" thing. I honestly think I only said yes to dating because I didn't want to hurt his feelings and I was lonely. What about anyone you've been friends with? There were certainly times it felt very weird calling Colleen my best friend with how bitchy she could be. Especially when you consider how non-confrontational I am, while she charged like a goddamn bull into arguments. Have you ever made out with someone in a pool? Uhhh I think that one night when I lived at the apartment and it was just us out there late at night. He and I went back inside before Jacob and Amanda TO hardcore make out because we both way too obviously wanted it so I wouldn't be remotely surprised if we snuck in some action at the pool oof. Who’s the last person that slept over your house? Sara. Do you still talk to the last person you kissed? Yes. Have you ever kissed someone with a tongue ring? No, I was the person with the tongue ring. I actually took it out a little while back because I was tired of accidentally chomping down on it when eating and chipping teeth. I'd already told myself if I did it one more time I would, and especially right now, we can't afford to keep filling cavities that have come from it. I don't at all regret getting it and it'll always be one of the cutest piercings I think I've ever had, but it was just time for it to come out. Is it hard for you to get over a lover? I THINK I'VE MADE THAT!!!!!!!!!!! O BVIO US S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have you ever tried making someone jealous? Not to my recollection. Did your last relationship end because of you or the other person? Both of us really, but she initiated the breakup, you could say. Who is the last person you flirted with? Sara. Who's the most racist person you know? Jesus Christ, I live in the South. I know dozens of racists. I guess the worst is uhhh OH the aforementioned Colleen, holy fucking shit. I highly highly highly doubt that has changed at all since we last associated with each other. If you could be a film character, who would you be? Let me be Alice Liddell. Crunchy peanut butter or smooth? Smooth is the only way to go with pb. Would you rather always be in a crowd, or be the only person on earth? "Always be in a crowd. It wouldn’t be fun, but I think it’d be better than being that alone." <<<< This. I legitimately think I'd wind up killing myself in the other case. Would you rather be rich, or famous? Why? "Rich, because...what’s the point of being famous if you’re not rich? Just everyone knowing all of your business?" <<<< Also this. Do you squeeze the toothpaste from the top or the bottom? "I start off from the top until it gets used enough that I have to squeeze up from the bottom." <<<< Lemme just steal all this person's answers lmao. How many children do you want? Girls or boys? None, but if I was to have kids, I'd definitely want a girl. Is there a story behind your name? What is it? No. What was one of the most fun things you and your college roommate did together? I didn't have a college roommate. Well wait no, during my first college attempt is when I lived w/ Jason, Jacob, and Amanda. I'd honestly prefer to not think too hard back on it to answer this. Does anyone know your bank pin number other than you? Who? I don't even have a bank account. Have you ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend who was depressed? Yeah, multiple. Would you be embarrassed to buy pads/tampons/condoms? Which one more? Pads or tampons, nah. I'd feel awkward buying condoms though. Are your parents gullible? Dad probably is; he has very little common sense. I got it from him lmao. Mom, heeeeell no. Do you still own a VCR? No. What color is the computer/laptop you’re on? Did you buy it yourself? It's black. No. Does the smell of cigarettes, weed and beer repulse you? All three do. Was the last person you kissed younger or older than you? Younger. Have you ever purchased Girl Scout cookies? Yeah. How often do you drink Monster? Never, because I don't like it. Have you ever made totally pointless videos with your friends? HAHA I was a cringy teen once, my friends. Do you like sitting on the inside or outside of a restaurant booth? Inside. I feel safer. Do you own a nightgown? No, I haven't worn those since I was a kid. Have you ever worn fishnets? Fishnet gloves. I WISH I could pull off fishnet pants. Would you rather go out to eat or be eaten out? In times like THESE???????? Bitch I wanna go eat out at a yummy restaurant. Do you always wear your seat belt? ABSOLUTELY. I get so stressed out when I see people not wearing one. Have you ever liked someone much older than you? Not much older. Have you ever been in a play? Just school ones as a kid. Is there ice cream in your freezer? No, but there's popsicles from when I couldn't get my tongue ring out and it was massively swollen and in terrible pain. Thank God I finally got it out. Have you ever liked the lyrics of a band but hated the music? Probably. Does your bathroom have a window? Yeah, but it's very small and up kinda high. Do you go somewhere to get your eyebrows done? I used to, but I don't anymore. I just leave them be. Do you believe prayer really works? Nope. Have you been on a date in the park? No. Are there any diseases/health problems that run in your family? A whole. Fucking. Lot. To just name a few, depression, high blood pressure, heart disease, cancer, diabetes... Do you have asthma? No. Last person to take off your pants, besides you? Jason. Least favorite alcoholic drink? Mother of God, this white wine I tried at Colleen's forever ago. It was fucking repulsive. How did you meet the last male you texted? I mean I literally came from his balls so like Have you ever had an embarrassing email address? Ha ha yeah, the one I've always had. It's not very adult-ish or "serious"-sounding, but I don't want to change it now. Do you put shampoo in your left or right hand? Left. I squeeze with my right. Do you have a bull ring through your nose? No, I don't feel that would look good on me. Do you and your dad get along? Yes. When was the last time you did clay work/pottery? My last year of art in high school. I made an anatomical heart for Jason. I wonder a lot if he still has it after how much work I put into it. Do you like art, hate it or just not mind it? I adore art. The world would be so much more boring without it. If you had to choose would you prefer dull pain for 12hours or sharp for 2? Ew, dull. Two hours with sharp pain sounds awful. Do you know the words to the national anthem of your country? Yeah. Would you rather be a Model, Famous Scientist, Singer or Chef? Scientist, probably. I'd love to be a biologist anyway, and that's a type of scientist. Would you rather be a pilot, crime scene investigator or estate agent? Ohhh, crime scene investigator. Does making others happy really make you feel happy? Yes! Did you ever swear at a teacher in school? Why? No. Have you ever pricked your finger on Holly or another ‘sharp’ plant? Yeah. Have you ever written your own short story? Yes. What about a novel? Or perhaps you started and couldn’t finish? "I started writing several novels, but abandoned them all." <<<< Same yo. Either of the above, if this was the case, place short synopsis here: The first one was about a very close meerkat family, divided into elemental "breeds," and the prince falling in love with another of his kind. His father had a stray brother who constantly aimed to destroy the family, but he was converted towards the end. That's all I can really remember about that one. There were others like two species of animals I made also falling in love, despite being predators and prey of each other, and fulfilling some sorta prophecy with their offspring. The other two I recall- yo fuck it I keep remember more and more okay I wrote a LOT. Do you prefer SciFi/Fantasy/Action/Horror or Rom/Com/RealLife? I'm guessing you mean in books, given the last three questions? I have a strong preference for fantasy. What do you have a lot of faith in [note: can be anything]? Hell if I know. Would you rather have a big house, a lot of kids or a high flying job? High flying job, easily. I don't want kids, nor do I need a large house, especially considering I hate cleaning even this tiny one. Have you ever been to a creepy/haunted/abandoned place? Yeah. What did it look like and what were the circumstances? It was this really old, mostly dilapidated shack full of cool stuff. It was by the field near our old house. Me, my sister, and our friend hung out there and explored all the time until this freaky woman showed out and told us we shouldn't be there. Do you know a Jack? What’s he like? Yeah. I don't him that well though, so idk. How about a Lisa? What’s she like? Yeah, she's one of my WoW friends that I've become really close with. She is an absolute sweetheart, but talks about herself way, way too excessively to the point it's hard to have a conversation sometimes. I know she doesn't realize it, though. When you have children, would you like twins? I say enough that I don't even want kids, SO FUCK NO. Do you know any twins? If so, what are they called? Yes. Tyler and Taylor. I know others, but idr their names. What personality trait does nearly everyone in your family seem to have? We're stubborn as all fuck hell. Do you have any nicknames that aren’t derived from your actual name? Yeah, some online ones and then my mom has called me "Twinkie" since I was a baby. Do you have any allergies? Yeah, of pollen and silver. What is the longest your hair has ever been? To or maybe even past the small of my back. Have you ever been on a blind date? No, not my jam. What is the oldest piece of clothing you still wear and how old is it? I really don't kn- oh yes I do. I have these oooold old thin and sewn-back-up-fifty-times Batman pj pants from when Jason and I were together, so maybe like... seven years? Thanks PTSD, I'm attached to them because Batman was his thing. How often do you eat out at a fancy restaurant? Just about never. Nutella or peanut butter? UGGGGGHHHHH I've been on a nutella thing lately. Have you ever hosted a wild party? Definitely not. Name/author of the last book you read cover to cover. Do you recommend it? Wings of Fire: The Lost Heir by Tui Sutherland. Yes, it was very good. How many of your Facebook friends do you actually hang with? Besides my immediate family, like... none anymore. Have you ever donated blood? Yes. From 1-10, how much do you like decorating for holidays? This is hard to gauge. I've never seriously done it myself, and I don't really have the motivation to do it just to take it all down a month or so later. I love it in concept, but yeah. Favorite animated Disney character? Probably Kiara from TLK2. Have you ever cooked a big family meal by yourself? Ha, no. Favorite winter activity? TAKING PICTURES IN THE SNOOOOOOOOW. Do you consider rapping singing? I mean I guess? Does your home have a fireplace? No. Do you listen to any religious music? No. Do you drink soda? If so, which one is your favorite? Ugh... soda is my weakness. I'd probably lose weight easier if I just stopped drinking it. Mountain Dew Voltage is my favorite, and I've also been on a serious strawberry Sunkist thing lately. How easily do you cry? I cry very, very easily. Can you handle spicy foods? What is your spice limit? Oh yeah. The only way I know how to gauge this one is that I enjoy the "hot" sauce at BWW lol. I've actually kinda cut back on HOW much I enjoy it, though; like I'm more into enjoying my food thoroughly lately than the adrenaline of spicy food. What day of the week is laundry day for you? I personally don't do the laundry because Mom prefers to just do ours together, so. It varies, I think. Have you ever played spin the bottle? No. Do you have any stickers on your laptop computer? If so, what are they of? Not on mine, but the one I currently have to use has tooons. I don't feel like looking at the lid trying to list what they are tho. How often do you say "y'all?" It's pretty much in my normal vernacular due to where I live. Do you believe in evolution? Yes. I have questions and curiosities about it, but when you consider how truly short it has been since considerable natural selection has been observed, why couldn't it exist on a bigger scale? Do you live in an apartment or a house? I live in a house. How long have you been at your current job? I'm unemployed. Have you ever ended a romantic relationship? Yes. Phrase you say the most? Probably "oof" lmao. Have you ever kissed anyone of the same gender? If so, did you like it? Yes and yes. Have you ever given anyone CPR? No. Have you ever learned to do anything from a how-to video on YouTube? Yes, mainly just editing stuff. Have you ever auditioned for a reality competition show? No. Have you ever been in the audience for the taping of a TV show? No. I've been at hockey games with Dad, but I don't consider those "TV shows." Have you ever given money to a street performer? I've never even seen one. Do you own any homemade clothing? Not that I know of. Have you ever bought anything from a flea market? Yeah, decorations 'n trinkets and stuff. I love flea markets. Have you ever quit a job? Yes. Are your birth parents together? No. Do you or have you ever worn glasses? I've worn glasses for years now. Have you ever been broken up with? AKA died in spirit? :^) Have you ever been the victim of a nasty prank? Not to my recolleciton. Favorite fandom? Y'all been known, the Markiplier fandom is a goddamn family. Can you surf? No. What motivates you to do well in life? The knowledge that I've most likely only got one life to make something of. How lucky do you consider yourself? I mean, ALL things considered, I'd say I'm at just below the baseline, maybe? I mean I could be homeless or dying of malaria or something. Have you ever been summoned for jury duty? No. Favorite summer activity? Swimming! Have you ever lived on a farm? No. I wanted to for years as a little kid, though. How often do you get mad at yourself? I've lately been in an almost constant state of anger regarding myself, honestly. Have you ever gotten any stitches? Yes. Favorite YouTube channel? The Marker Plier guy. Do you have a pool at your house? No. Last thing that made you laugh? Something on Game Grumps. Earbud or earmuff headphones? Earbuds. Earmuffs hurt my head and ears. Have you ever been a bridesmaid or a groomsman? Yes. Have you ever gotten a New Year’s kiss exactly at midnight? I don't think so. Have you ever voted for a reality competition show? The only time I did that I remember is when Landau Eugene Murphy Jr. won America's Got Talent. I adored him and voted like mad. Does anyone in your family currently serve in your country’s military? Ummm maybe distantly? I don't know anyone off the top of my head. Are you comfortable with watching rated R movies? Well yeah.

#survey #surveys #questions

[ladywinchester1967]

Shape of my Heart:

Chapter 4

Pairing: Billionaire!Jensen Ackles x Allie Edwards (OFC)

Warnings: Language, SMUT, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), jealous!Jensen, angst, fluff. I think that’s it.  

A/N: Chapter 4 is finally here!!!! This is a long one, so grab yourself a snack and or a drink and buckle up! Disclaimer: This is a work of FICTION and isn’t meant to disrespect Jensen, Danneel or their family (we’ll pretend he is single). I did read over this, but if any mistakes slipped through the cracks, they are mine, but any pics are not. All credit goes to the OPs. 

Need or want to catch up?

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

“So let me get this right,” Jared said as he did some push ups “you’re only seeing her, you take her on dates AND you’re fucking her.”

“Not so loud okay? We’re on the upper east side.” Jensen said as he to started to lift weights, working his biceps.

“Sounds like a boyfriend to me.” Jared pointed out.

“I’m not her boyfriend,” Jensen said “boyfriend means we’re intimate, more involved in each other’s lives. She’d know everything about me and I’d know everything about her, which I don’t.”

“Cut the crap Jay,” Jared said “you’re her boyfriend. End of story.”

“I am not.” Jensen said, anger pulsing through his system.

“So, you mean to tell me that if she called you right now and said “hey, I’m going to go on a date with this other guy” you wouldn’t be mad?”

“Of course I would be!” Jensen said “What kind of a damn question is that?”

“An obvious one.” Jared said as he got up off the floor and switching to doing sit ups “You two are boyfriend and girlfriend, you’re just too scared to admit it.”

Jensen rolled his eyes.

“No I am not.”

“Are you taking her to the gala this weekend?” Jared asked with an eyebrow raised.

“I haven’t asked,” Jensen said “but I was planning on it.”

Jared stopped doing sit ups long enough to point at Jensen and said

“See? That’s something a boyfriend and girlfriend would do. Quit being a pussy and just admit it.”

Jensen groaned and Jared went back to doing sit ups.

☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆

The whole way home, Jensen wondered if he had been going about things will Allie the wrong way. Had he given her the impression that they were in a relationship? Perhaps he’d been too open, too close with her. Maybe it would help to distance himself from her so as not to give her false hope that he’d change his mind. The thought crept into the back of his mind; if he was allowed to see other people, then so was she. The idea of her being in another man’s arms made him even more angry than he could have ever imagined. Someone else making her laugh and smile, someone else laying in bed with her at night made him grip the steering wheel so hard he was afraid he’d dent it. He was torn and confused. He hated admitting that Jared was right. They were boyfriend and girlfriend, just without the label of it. He groaned, annoyed that he’d been so oblivious to the corner he’d painted himself into.

☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆

That night, Allie met him at a small local restaurant with a smile on her face. The air had turned just a little chilly so she was wearing grey leggings tucked into black, high heeled boots with a floral print, tunic top and her hair in a high ponytail. She greeted him with a kiss and they sat down.

“How was your day?” He asked as they looked at their menus.

“Good,” She told him “I went shopping with Natalia, she needed some new makeup so I went with her, then I showed her how to put it on because, bless her, she has no idea what she’s doing.”

Jensen chuckled and asked

“But I’m guessing you do?”

“I’ve watched enough tutorials, so I would hope so.” She said “And they’re always asking me for makeup advice, which is another reason I went with her.”

“Her and Trish?” Jensen asked and she nodded. For a second, Jensen internally cussed. He knew the names of her best friends. They, in fact, were a couple.

“God damn it.” He thought as he tried to pick something to eat. Maybe it would be best for him to pull back. Seem disinterested, not give her so much attention. His eyes flicked up and he watched as she twirled a lock of her hair between her fingers. He smirked and realized he couldn’t give this up even if he wanted to.

“Um,” he said and she looked up at him “before we order, can I talk to you about something?”

“Sure,” She said “what’s on your mind?”

He cleared his throat and said

“I wanted to talk about what I said the other night, about not being boyfriend and girlfriend.”

“Hey,” She told him “you don’t have to explain it to me, I get it.”

“You do?” He asked, confused.

“Look,” She told him “you don’t want to be attached and I get that. I’ll be your fuck buddy  and I’m fine with that.” Jensen noticed the slight tinge in her voice that indicated she was far from “okay” with this arrangement. Jensen took a deep breath and asked

“Can we start over? I feel like this got off on the wrong foot.”

She looked at him, puzzled, and he said

“Hi, my name is Jensen and I’m fucking confused about what I want.”

“If you’re confused,” she told him “we can talk about it.”

The waitress came by and took their order, which they placed and then went back to their conversation.

“The reason, the real reason, my last relationship didn’t work out is complicated to say the least.” Jensen said.

“So, tell me about it,” she told him “step by step.”

He sighed and said

“Her name was, sorry is, Brooke. We dated for six years, pretty much right out of college, just as I was building my products and starting to sell them.” Allie nodded and he went on “It took a long time for anyone to be interested, she didn’t understand and got tired of waiting around for my big break. She broke up with me and then the next week I sold my first software program.”

“Let me guess, she came crawling back didn’t she?” Allie asked.

“Once she heard how much I’d sold the program for, she surely did.” Jensen said “I wouldn’t take her back because she’d shown her true colors and, naturally, she was furious.”

Allie cocked her head and asked

“This is gonna sound really ignorant, but how much is a software program worth?”

“Depends on the program,” Jensen told her “the first program I sold was designed to scan banks for fraudulent activity faster than the old program.”

“You designed it AND sold it?” She asked and he nodded.

“I found a way to improve the software that already existed.” He told her “But no one wants to take a chance with a kid fresh out of college with six bucks to his name and a “can do” attitude.” She laughed at this and then asked

“If you don’t mind me asking, how much do you sell it for?”

“A million and a half.” He told her and she nearly spit out her drink. “I used that to buy my first office and develop my next product, and it just took off from there. I went from software to hardware, which is more interesting than coding, at least to me it is.”

“And now you have what?” She asked.

“Three hundred employees,” he said “a technology firm that’s expanding every single day, more financial security than I ever thought possible and all the perks that come with that.”

“And you were on a dating website why?” She asked and he laughed.

“Jared set it up for me as a joke remember?” He asked “When Brooke left me, it left a gaping hole in my life that I ignored for a long time. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been on my share of dates and hand my fun with women, but I never entertained the idea of getting closer to anyone until you came along.”

“And you’re telling me all of this, why exactly?” She asked as their food arrived. They both thanked the waitress and she walked away. Jensen cut his chicken and ate a bit of it before answering.

“The reason I said I’m not ready to commit is because I don’t want to be hurt like that ever again. But Jared pointed out that we’re doing everything regular couples do.”

“That can stop.” She told him and he shook his head.

“This is something I never readily admit, but I’m the jealous type,” he said “I thought about telling you we’re not exclusive but the idea of you being with someone else makes my skin crawl.”

She smiled, at least it wasn’t a mystery how he felt about her.

“Jensen,” She told him “I meant what I said. We can NOT see other people, but if being labeled “boyfriend” puts to much pressure on you, it’s fine. I don’t mind just being friends with benefits.”

He was relieved, but at the same time he felt a nagging feeling.

“You’re sure?” He asked and she nodded.

“I like being with you,” She told him “you’re fun to hang out with, we can talk for hours and not get bored and I want to keep that.”

Jensen was torn, even if she was saying all of this to pacify him, who was he to turn down keeping such an amazing person in his life?

“Okay,” He said “we’ll try this friends with benefits thing and see where it goes. Is that okay?”

“Perfectly.” She told him and smiled.

After dinner, they stopped at a frozen yogurt shop where you could customize your yogurt with pretty much any topping you could think of. They had everything from strawberries to peppers and sprinkles to brownie bits. They walked and talked as they ate, and then she asked

“So you make technology for cell phones right?”

“And tablets,” he told her “pretty much any computer we make software and hardware for.”

“What other areas have you gotten into?” She asked him.

“Some of our stuff has been used to perfect delicate medical procedures on humans and animals,” he said “I just authorized the development for a software that can detect cancer earlier in genetically predisposed clients.”

“Genetically predisposed?” She asked as she took a bite of her yogurt.

“People who have a history of cancer in their immediate families,” he said “it can also detect specific genetic signatures that may lead to cancer.”

“Wow,” She said, blown away “and you came up with that?”

“I wish I could take credit for that but I can’t,” He told her “my research and development department did that. This is my first foray into medicine so if things get stressful in the coming weeks, that’s why.”

“So, they write the programs and you decide which ones to go further with?” She asked and he nodded.

“That’s the footnotes version, yes.” He said with a smirk.

She stopped and stared at him with a small smile on her face.

“What?” He asked, looking at her.

“Nothing.” She said with a grin, keeping the secret to herself. The way he talked about the things that he did was captivating. He spoke with such passion and interest that was hard to find in someone unless they were truly vested in the things that they did.

“If you say so.” He said and took another bite of his frozen yogurt “How’s it going with the dance class?”

“We have a recital in two weeks,” she told him “the kids will show off what they learned in front of their parents, it’ll be super cute.”

“And your class is performing too?” He asked and she nodded.

“Yep, my three to fives will perform.” She told him.

He sighed and finally gave in, he was invested in her as much as she was in him.

“Could I tag along?” He asked “At least to congratulate the teacher.”

Allie nearly spit out her dessert.

“You wanna come to the recital?” She asked and he nodded “Are you sure? It’s gonna be boring as hell.”

“I want to see what you do.” He said “You know all about the things I do.”

She blushed hard and then nodded.

“Yeah, sure,” She said with a smile “I’ll be sure to save you a seat.”

“Speaking of saving seats,” he said “there’s this thing that I was invited to this weekend, some friends of the family and business associates are throwing this benefit for a charity. I know that’s really vague, but it’s the best I can remember without the invitation in front of me.”

“Okay?” She asked and finished off her dessert.

“Would you mind going with me? As my plus one?” He asked. She let a grin cross her face.

“Where’s it gonna be?” She asked

“The Hamptons,” He said “it’s a gala, there’s going to be dancing, an auction, all that shit.”

“Ah, I see.” She said “A fancy folks thing?”

“Very fancy.” He said “like a black tie kind of thing.”

“Well then,” she said “guess I’m gonna have to go shopping then. Damn!” She added with a grin and he laughed.

“If it’s the money you’re worried about-“ he started and she shook her head.

“Jay, I don’t want your money.” She told him “I got this. I can handle it.”

“You’re sure?” He asked “Because I have stores that would line up to dress you.”

“Do you?” She asked with an eyebrow raised.

“I’m a VERY good customer.” He said with one eyebrow raised 

and she laughed again.

☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆

The next day, armed with the cash, Natalia and Trish, Allie set off on Fifth Ave to go shopping.

“So you need a dress.” Trish said as they entered the first boutique.

“Looks like we might have some luck in here.” Allie said as an associate approached them.

“Can I help you ladies find anything?” The woman asked.

“Yes,” Allie said “I’m going to an event this weekend and need help finding a dress.” Allie explained the situation she would be in and the woman, Maggie, smiled.

“Okay, we have a few options if you want to take a look around. I’ll show you what we have for a dress.”

☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆

When Jensen knocked on the door, he wasn’t sure what to expect, but when it opened and he saw what Allie was wearing, his jaw nearly hit the floor. She’d chosen a navy blue dress that hung off of her shoulders and silver, sparkly heels.

Her hair was done in a loose bun with curls framing her face, she wore a bright red lipstick and winged eyeliner.

“Well? Does this pass the muster?” She asked with a smile.

“Far exceeds the muster.” He said with a grin “You look elegant.”

“Thank you.” She told him

“Shall we?” He asked and offered her his arm, which she took as she shut the door behind them.

Once they were in the car with Clif, Jensen's driver and body guard at the wheel, Jensen couldn’t take his eyes off of Allie.

“You look amazing,” he said “did you pick this out?”

“Natalia and Trish talked me into it.” She said in earnest “I was gonna go with a plain black dress but they said I looked better in this one.”

“I’ll have to agree with them.” He said, his hand on her knee. She looked down at his hand and then up at him with a grin.

☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆

When they arrived at the house where the cocktail party was being held, the car drove through massive iron gates and up a winding driveway to a sprawling mansion.

“Wow.” Allie said as she admired the house “Who lives here? A Rockefeller?”

Jensen laughed and said

“No, but I think they are a friend of that family. They’re designers.”

“And these people are your friends?” Allie asked.

“Business associates, yes.” Jensen said as the car came to a stop near the front door. Jensen’s door opened and they were greeted by a man in a black suit.

“Mr. Ackles,” the man said “always a pleasure to see you.”

“You as well Tony.” Jensen said as he got out of the car and extended his hand to Allie, who took it. He helped her out of the car and Tony said “The party is being held in the back half of the house, preceded to the front door and any one of our liaisons will be more than happy to escort you.”

“Thank you.” Jensen said with a curt nod. He offered Allie his arm, which she clung to, shaking like a leaf.

“What’s wrong?” Jensen asked as they walked.

“I’ve never been to anything like this before, what if they hate me or something?”

Jensen chuckled and kissed her temple.

“No one could ever hate you,” He told her “be your usual sweet, charming self and they’ll love you.”

“You think I’m charming?” She asked and he nodded as they crossed the stone walk way to the entrance of the house where a few guests were waiting to get in. Once Jensen showed them his invitation, they stepped into a large entryway where a massive staircase made of iron rails wound upward and into the rest of the house. Allie tried to keep her jaw from hitting the floor as a gentleman approached them.

“Mr. Ackles, always a pleasure,” he said and shook Jensen’s hand “and who might this be?”

“This is Allie,” Jensen said “Allie, this is Anthony.”

“Nice to meet you.” Allie said and stuck her hand out. Anthony briefly shook her hand and smiled.

“Likewise,” Anthony said “if you two will follow me, I’ll show you to the terrace.”

Allie’s eyes went wide as they walked through the entry way and into a massive library where some guests were talking and mingling. They went through a hallway, then a living area and through another door. On the terrace, there was a bar set up with a string quartet playing music. The terrace opened up on to a lawn where a tent had been set up, inside were several tables and a lot of guests lingering around in and out of the tent.

“You two enjoy yourselves.” Anthony said and left them.

They walked down the stairs to the party where a waiter was passing around drinks.

“What can I get for you two?” He asked “I have bourbon and champagne right now.”

Jensen looked to Allie who said

“I’ll take a champagne.”

“Bourbon for me.” Jensen said.

The waiter handed them each a glass and they made their way toward the tent.

“Do you know all of these people?” Allie asked as she saw more and more guests.

“Most of them, yes.” He said “Friends of the family, business associates, that sort of thing.”

“Are any of them YOUR friends?” Allie asked.

“A few of them, my closest friends couldn’t make it.” He said and looked around “See the couple over there by the bar?” He asked.

Allie looked and saw a tall, older gentleman with white hair and glasses. Allie described him and Jensen nodded “That’s Bill Wayne, he and his wife are the ones hosting this shindig.”

“Where’s Suzy? I only see the guy.” Allie said “She’s around here somewhere, she’s a social butterfly.” Jensen said and they walked over to where Bill was standing. When he and Jensen made eye contact, Bill smiled.

“Jensen,” Bill said and shook Jensen’s hand “good to see you again.”

“Same to you Bill,” Jensen said with a smile “Allie, this is Bill Wayne. Bill, this is Allie.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr. Wayne.” Allie said and stuck out her hand. Bill laughed

“Please, call me Bill,” he insisted and shook Allie’s hand “and it’s a pleasure to meet you as well.”

“Your home is so beautiful.” Allie said.

“Oh, I can’t take the credit for that,” Bill said “this was my wife’s pet project, but she’ll be delighted to hear you say that.”

“Jensen!” A female voice said and he turned to see a tall, thin woman with jet black hair wearing a silver dress.

“Oh there she is.” Bill said with his eyes shining.

“Suzy, we were just talking about you.” Jensen told her. Suzy beamed as she got closer, she greeted Jensen by kissing both of his cheeks and then asked

“All good things I hope?”

“Nothing but darling,” Bill said “Allie was just saying how much she admires the house.”

Suzy turned her attention to Allie and the two ladies shook hands.

“It’s just gorgeous.” Allie said and sipped her champagne.

“Well thank you!” Suzy said excitedly “It was an intense labor of love.”

“It was?” Allie asked

“Yes,” Suzy said “when we bought it, everything was severely outdated and it took six years to get it just right.”

“Six years?!” Allie asked in amazement “I don’t know how you lived through a renovation like that.”

“A lot of this.” Suzy said and held up her glass of wine and Allie laughed.

“What else can you tell me about the house?” Allie asked.

“Well, it was built in 1919,” Suzy said “and it desperately needed to be brought into the 21st century before we could move in. It sits on a little over seven acres with eleven bedrooms and twelve and a half bathrooms.”

“Wow!” Allie said, stunned “That’s amazing!”

“Thank you very much,” Suzy said “but enough about me, what about you? What do you do?”

Allie took a sip of her champagne and said

“I’m an office assistant at Glory and Associates.”

“I know them,” Bill said “Glory was started by one of our junior associates.”

“Oh, you’re a lawyer?” Allie asked and Bill nodded.

“Been practicing law for over thirty years.” He said proudly.

A little while later, after making a few more introductions, Allie excused herself to go to the bathroom. When she was out of sight, one of Suzy’s friends, Joyce who had known Dean his entire life, said

“Jensen, this one is splendid!”

Jensen chuckled and took a sip of his drink.

“Thank you,” He said “she’s something isn’t she?”

Joyce nodded and said

“Don’t let this one get away, you hear me?”

Jensen didn’t say anything, he just took another sip of his drink.

When Allie returned to the tent, everyone had taken their seats and she eventually found Jensen, who was chatting with Joyce and her husband Richard. Allie took her seat and Jensen looked over at her as a waiter came by.

“Care for another drink ma’am?” He asked and held out another champagne glass.

“Yes, please.” She said and gratefully accepted it. When the waiter walked away Jensen leaned into Allie.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes,” she said with a smile “there’s just a lot going on, I’ve never been to a party like this before.”

“If it’s any consolation, they adore you.” Jensen said with a twinkle in his eyes and a hand on her knee. She blushed deeply and asked

“Really? They do?”

Jensen nodded

“Very much,” He said “thank you again for coming with me.”

“Thanks for inviting me.” She said and placed her hand over his, giving it a squeeze. His green eyes sparkled as he took her hand in his, their fingers lacing together. Allie’s pulse pounded and she blushed even deeper, making him chuckle. He leaned in closer and said

“You’re gorgeous when you blush.”

This made her cheeks turn even more red, having his lips in such close proximity to her face. He pulled back and looked at her, smiling. He brushed his knuckles on her cheek and she leaned into his touch, smiling broadly.

“Let’s say we cut this evening a little short?” He asked, a mischievous grin on his face.

She furrowed her eyebrows and said

“I thought you were part of the auction.”

“After that I mean.” He said.

“Sure, I’d love to.” She said, her eyes sparkling.

After that, Bill and Suzy got up and welcomed everyone to the party then started the auction. Several of the items were vacations and theater tickets.

“You wanna bid on anything?” Jensen asked.

“I have the one thing I’d bid on.” She said grinning at him.

“Oh? And what would that be?” He asked, smiling.

“You.” She told him and squeezed his hand.

He shook his head as he smiled and then kissed the back of her hand.

On the car ride home, Allie laid her head on Jensen’s shoulder, both of her arms wrapped around one of his. He pulled her legs into his lap and laid one hand on her knee.

“You sleepy baby?” He asked as he kissed her temple.

“Yeah,” She said with a yawn “I had a long day.”

“I know you did.” He said quietly “Close your eyes for a little bit.”

Allie nodded and closed her eyes.

They eventually arrive at Jensen’s house where Clif parked the car and Jensen gently shook Allie’s shoulder.

“Sweetheart, I hate to wake you, but we’re back at the house.”

She yawned at sat up as Jensen climbed out of the SUV. Allie followed behind him, holding onto his arm as they walked to the front door with Clif right behind them.

“Have a good night.” Clif told them and gave them a smile and a nod before heading back to the car. Thye each told him good night as Jensen unlocked the door and the both walked through it.

“Come on sweetheart.” Jensen said and scooped her up into his arms, making her laugh.

“Jensen!” She exclaimed “I can walk!”

“Why? When I can carry you?” He asked and kissed her cheek. She giggled as he walked her to his bedroom. He pushed the door open with his foot and then set her down. She quickly took her shoes off and turned to face Jensen, who was shutting the door. When he turned around, she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“I had a really good time tonight.” She told him. He placed his hands on her hips and he pressed his forehead to hers.

“I did too.” He said in a low tone, his green eyes burning into hers. She slowly leaned in and pressed her lips to his as her heart pounded loudly. An immediate tingling sensation went from her lips down to her toes as he tenderly kissed her. He slid his hands around to her back and up to her shoulders, burying his fingers into her hair.

“Allie,” he breathed as they kissed again “fuck, I want you.”

She pulled back and nodded

“I want you too.” She told him as they kissed again. His fingers found the corset of her dress and untied it, ridding her of the navy dress he’d become so fond of. She pulled back again and pulled the dress down, showing off her curvy figure which was clad in black, lacy underwear and a matching bra. She reached for him, yanking his tie and jacket off. He unbuttoned his dress shirt and flung it to the side of the room. He wrapped her up into his arms and backed her up and on to the bed where he crawled over the top of her and kissed her breathless. She reached for his belt and undid it along with his pants and he kicked off his shoes and socks. Once his pants were discarded, she slid up the bed and laid back against the pillows where he followed her. Left in only his underwear, he slid up her body, leaving kisses and love bites in his wake.

“Mh, Jensen!” She moaned as his mouth worked its way back up to hers where he seared a kiss on to her lips.

“Fuck baby,” he moaned into her neck as he kissed it “so fucking sexy when you moan for me.”

He sucked gently on her neck and wrapped his arms around her. She sighed and wrapped her legs around his waist, grinding into his hardness.

“Fuck,” he moaned “you want something sweetheart?”

She nodded as they kissed and said

“I want that cock buried in me.”

“Shit,” Jensen murmured as he kissed her “I have a naughty girl on my hands.”

“Yes you do,” she moaned “and I want your cock. Now.”

“Greedy girl,” Jensen said as he kissed her again “you’ll get it.”

“Please,” she begged “fill me up babe, I need you inside me.”

Jensen quickly pulled down his underwear as Allie pulled hers down and off. Jensen lined up with her eager hole and pushed gently inside her. She clung to him and sighed as he filled her to the brim.

“Oh fuck Jensen!” She moaned and he started to move, bucking his hips into her.

“Fuck baby,” he moaned “you feel fucking amazing.”

She moaned his name over and over as she moved with him rolling her hips to meet his, crying out with every stroke of his cock inside her.

“Jay,” she cried “oh fuck, Jay, I fuck!”

“That’s it,” he moaned as he kissed her “talk to me sweetheart, tell me what you want.”

“Fuck me,” she begged him “please just fuck me!”

He pulled her up and into his lap as he smacked her ass.

“Ride my cock baby girl.” He commanded, digging his fingers into her hips.

“Oh fuck,” she moaned as she thrust into him “fuck yes, oh fuck, I love having this big cock inside me!”

He let out an almost primal growl as he moved her hips.

“You do?” He asked as he kissed her.

“Yes,” she cried desperately as she raked her hands through his hair, both of them moving together “feels fucking amazing.”

They both uttered curses and each other’s names as their hips met, skin slapping on skin as the heat between the reached its fever pitch.

“You gonna come for me?” Jensen asked “Come on baby girl, come for me.” He pressed his finger tips into her clit and worked it in slow, languid circles.

“Oh fuck!” She cried out, clamping down hard on him “Oh fuck, yes! That feels so fucking good!”

“Damn,” He said as he worked her clit a little harder “you really like this baby, clamping down so hard on me!”

“Yes!” She sighed as she kissed him “Gonna come babe!”

“That’s it pretty girl,” he moaned into her mouth “come all over me, soak my lap.”

With that, the both let go, cries of ecstasy filling the room.

☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆

Later that night, Jensen lay on his side as Allie slept on her stomach. Her back steadily rose with each breath as he gently stroked her bare back. He couldn’t remember ever feeling this way about any girl before, some how, some way, this one was different, but he couldn’t put his finger on what made her so different from the others. He gently kissed her shoulder and turned out the light before going to sleep.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hope you guys enjoyed that long update!! As always, your kind feedback is deeply loved and appreciated. All of my boxes and tag lists are open, so if you want to be added on to any of them, or just wanna drop by and say “hello” just shoot me a message or an ask!

See you guys got the next chapter!

​​​The Squad:

@waywardbaby​​​​​​​​​​ @waywardnerd67​​​​​​​​​​ @familybusinesswritingbro​​​​​​​​​​ @ain-t-bovvered​​​​​​​​​​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​​​​​​​​​​ @unholyqu33n​​​​​​​​​​ @dacleverfox​​​​​​​​​​ @emoryhemsworth​​​​​​​​​​ @bobasheebaby​​​​​​​​​ @myinconnelly1​​​​​​​​​​ @mogaruke​​​​​​​​​​ @imma-winchester-addict​​​​​​​​​​​ @purpleskiesandcherrypies​​​​​​​​​​ @dean-winchesters-bacon​​​​​​​​​​ @animerose96​​​​​​​​​​​  @roonyxx​​​​​​​​​​​ @snffbeebee​​​​​​​​​​​ @ezilyamuzed​​​​​​​​​​​ @srsllydunnodoncare​​​​​​​​​​​ @latetothewinchesterparty​​​​​​​​​​​ @emilyshurley​​​​​​​​​​​ @atc74​​​​​​​​​​​ @midnightsilverafterdark​​​​​​​​​​​ @adoptdontshoppets​​​​​​​​​​​ @biawol​​​​​​​​​​​  @spaceystacey123​​​​​​​​​​​ @bella-ca​​​​​​​​​​​ @clo-heda​​​​​​​​​​​ @closetspngirl​​​​​​​​​​​ @thekatherinewinchester​​​​​​​​​​​ @maddiepants​​​​​​​​​​​ @idreamofplaid​​​​​​​​​​ @love-those-boys-in-flannel​​​​​​​ @flamencodiva​​​​​​​​​ @blueberrykushlovexoxo-blog​​​​​​​ @sandlee44​​​​​​​ @tumbler-tidbits​​​​​ @rainbowsinthestorm @deans-baby-momma​​​​ @algud​​​ @maui137​ @drakelover78​ @keymology

Dean/ Jensen:

@spnbaby-67​​ @akshi8278​​ @deanscarlett​​​​​ 

#lady winchester writes #supernatural #Jensen Ackles #jensen ackles x ofc #jensen ackles smut #Supernatural smut