#i love her so much she's like the amalgamation of the woman i wanted to become

[riewritten]

another entry for...

DUSK IN THE BRIGHTEST if it was an OC-insert instead

#i love her so much she's like the amalgamation of the woman i wanted to become #the reason why i couldnt call DIB a self indulgent/self insert bc i crafted her so perfectly it'd be impossible for me to relate to her #BUT STILL #u know the motherly instincts i get whenever i remember her #dusk in the brightest #attack on titan x oc #aot oc #aot x oc #attack on titan oc #aot original character #aot x original character #aot oc x erwin smith #erwin smith x oc #rie brainstorms

[stem-sister-scuffle]

STEM SISTER SCUFFLE: ROUND 2 MASHUP 7

Alphys (Undertale) vs Jade Harley (Homestuck)

Alphys is a Roboticist, Biologist and Souls/Determination Researcher!

Jade Harley is a Nuclear Physicist!

Why you should vote for each contestant:

Alphys:

"Because she messed with DETERMINATION and made Amalgamates, blending monsters into each other to form horrible combinations of undead beings. She’s a lesbian"

"Man made horrors, overwhelming guilt, cute lizard girl, bisexual"

"SHE'S SO CUTE. She's awkward and shy but you can tell she knows a lot about what she does!! She's also a bit of a tragic character considering her biological endeavors have gone kinda. wrong. SHE'S BI AND LIKE ANIME 🫶"

"Ultra qualified women with deep scientific knowledge who are also massive anime nerds and can't hold a simple conversation represent!"

"idk she's kind of just. The Royal Scientist . built a robot and put a soul in it. tried to bring monsters back to life, this failed miserably. did research on souls and determination. has a kickass lab. also nerdy as hell and can't just. tell the truth to save her life. love her"

"I don't think we have a word for "works with SOULs and DETERMINATION, including fusing ghosts with robot bodies and creating immortal abominations of multiple people stuck together." I guess you could probably just put her down as Robotics. Mechatronics or something. Like sure she melted a bunch of guys, but she takes responsibility! Feeds em dog food! That takes responsibility. Bisexual"

"She had a friend who was a ghost, and they wanted to be famous! So she used her knowledge of robotics to build them a new body how they wanted! He became famous, as he wished! And Alphys worked on a bigger, better body that fit him well, though it used up a lot of power and needed more upgrades, hence why it wasn’t used often until the final battle with him (Him being Mettaton). But basically, Mettaton got a new body the way he liked it, changed his name, and started going by different pronouns (Mettaton is only ever referred to by they/them when people reference the ghost). Alphys allowed him to feel much happier as himself, and they’re great friends! Though, she did pretend that she created Mettaton and his SOUL herself, no ghostliness involved. But Mettaton did agree to that.

Because of her perceived achievement, (though her actual achievement was also pretty cool) Alphys was hired as the Royal Scientist for the Underground, and got to work with Asgore, the king of all monsters! She continued working with Mettaton, and Asgore asked her to try and find a way to break the barrier that was trapping them Underground without killing humans. Alphys found an interesting thing called Determination, or DT within humans using the SOULs of humans Asgore had killed and allowed her access to.

She tested it on some flowers in his garden to see what would happen, and nothing did. That she realized at the time, anyway. She had actually injected DT into a flower sprinkled with the remains of Asriel, the king’s dead son, and brought him back to life as a flower. Problem was, Asriel, or Flowey as he eventually called himself, didn’t have a SOUL anymore, since he was a flower. Thinking that nothing had happened, Alphys decided to try and see if it could really bring back monsters that had fallen down/were on the verge of death. She asked people for their family members that had fallen down. The monsters that had fallen down were basically dead, but the last of their magic hadn’t quite run out yet. However, their magic was being spent keeping their bodies from turning to dust, and they were unable to move, pretty much in a coma. So really, if it didn’t work, no harm done! Either it works and they live, it kills them, or it doesn’t do anything and they still die!

Alphys conducted her tests, and at first, it worked! All of the monsters were getting up and moving around! She contacted the families to send them back, but when she was about to, she discovered they had all started melting and had stuck together and merged into one being. She chickened out for fear of how the families would react, and proceeded to ignore a bunch of letters for quite a while. Eventually, she did own up to it, though she was immediately fired (by the EX-queen, not Asgore. Was that even legal?). The families were just happy to have their loved ones back, and while they were still somewhat upset, understandably so, they didn’t really blame her all too much.

ALSO!! She got a girlfriend!! She’s canonically expressed interest in Undyne, Captain of the Royal Guard and who would eventually be her girlfriend, Asgore, and the unknowable! She has made mistakes. Big ones. But honestly, I don’t blame her for the mistakes. The real problem was that she is incredibly anxious and let that get the better of her, leading to her not telling people important things that they deserved to know. She’s not the best at being honest."

Jade Harley:

"She's soo fun and silly and her symbol is literally an atom. she regularly irradiates steak to feed her weird dog"

"She and her nuclear powered dog creating a new universe. she's cool"

"Built a modded bass guitar that's only playable when she's in her robot form and has extra arms. Became a doggirl. She also plays the flute :)"

"i think you have enough ramblings about her already but i couldnt NOT submit her, she is so dear to me <3"

"bbg has THREE scientific specialties!! she genetically modifies plants and makes them grow beautifully high just because she can and loves science. in her alpha timeline she’s a tech mogul and creates technology that challenges the evil empress that brought earth to ruin. AND she’s a furry"

"Doggy"

"She plays a silly flute refrain. She's a furry. Literally, she's a doggirl. She's also a god and created the universe. JADE BEST GIRLIE!!!!"

#stem sister scuffle #round 2 #alphys #ut alphys #undertale #utdr #jade harley #hs jade #homestuck jade #homestuck

[legitalicat]

Too Sweet - Modern!Aegon Targaryen ii x reader

AN: Hello my beautiful people! I hope you enjoy this story. It started as a little love note to the song "Too Sweet" by Hozier because I feel it's very Aegon coded. It then became kind of an amalgamation of a few different stories. My own story and journey with alcoholism and recovery played a big part in this, and as I wrote it parts of my feelings about my older brother, who is in active addiction, came into play. Please know that this is not everyone's story. Recovery from addiction looks different for most everyone. I truly overcame my addiction through building community and connections. I know many people who have to work a program to succeed. I know a person who actually did get a degree after a near lifetime of addiction and now he does a lot of things to help our local community in treating addiction. So really, this is a love letter to people like me and my brother. There is hope and I believe in every one of you.

Link to the TED Talk mentioned.

TW: blatant talks of alcoholism and substance abuse, talks of rehab, family issues, abusive family subtext yet never explicitly stated, gonna say it's kinda angsty, FLUFF

Pairings: Aegon Targaryen ii x reader

Word count: almost 3k

The soft pads of her feet made barely any noise as she walked into his bedroom, carrying a mug in each hand and wearing nothing but his MCR tee-shirt. Technically, they should both be in a deep sleep by now. It was fast approaching four in the morning and neither of them had bothered to close their eyes once. It was all he could to not hold her close in bed and stare at her captivating beauty.

When Aegon first saw her, weeks ago, he was stunned. It was the first time he had gone to the new bar right down the road from his apartment and it just so happened it was karaoke night. He had been tempted to turn around when he heard a horrendous rendition of his favorite Hozier song. But then she took the mic from her drunken friend, and it was as if the heavens parted and the gods showed him the future Mrs. Aegon Targaryen.

“Your coffee, sir,” she said to him as she handed him a mug. “No worries, it’s as black as your soul,” she added with a teasing grin.

“Thank you, beautiful,” he said as he took the mug from her.

She was truly a lesson in divinity for him. Aegon didn’t truly believe she was the most gorgeous woman on the planet. There would be people who would think she was average looks, maybe even less than that, but he didn’t need her to be more beautiful than anyone else. He wanted her exactly as she was. Beautiful like a spring day, teeming with beauty in the most natural of ways. Like one would think of a cherry blossom tree, or their favorite flower. Simple and breathtaking, a reminder of life and truth on a fundamental level.

He knew it the moment they locked eyes in that bar. Her voice shook from nerves as she sang in front of the crowd of strangers. When she looked at him, and he at her, he felt joyful for the first time in years. All of the stupid shit with his family, the years of drowning his sorrows in whiskey and wine and any other drug, none of it mattered.

If he were honest, he couldn’t remember how he got so lucky. He knew he approached her once she was done singing and complimented her. By the end of the night she was nestled beside him in bed, and he’d be damned if he ever let her leave.

“Gods, you’re amazing,” he muttered as he watched her. He knew she was drinking hot chocolate, finding the taste of coffee much too bitter.

“What was that?” she asked him when she pulled the mug away from her face. She had a bit of whipped cream on her upper lip, making his heart feel like it was on the brim of exploding.

He leaned forward, just barely, and lifted his hand to wipe the cream away with his thumb. She gave him a cute little smile when it brushed against her lips, puckering them to press a kiss to his skin. When he pulled his hand away and sucked the cream off, he heard her giggle.

“This is why you’re so sweet. Where most people drink whiskey and coffee, you put sugar in your sugar and drink it until the sun comes up,” he told her. Of course, he was teasing her.

“Because unlike you, Mr. Listen to Sad Music Even When I’m Happy, I like to enjoy things. The good things. The sweet things, like whipped cream and hot chocolate and fruit loops in bed on Saturday mornings. I just think I live a better life than you,” she told him. She was grinning from ear to ear.

If Aegon wasn’t so afraid of rejection, he would tell her how he loved her. He loved that she wanted to eat sweets at all times. He loved that she teased him for listening to My Chemical Romance or Asking Alexandria, calling it all sad music, even when she would listen right alongside him. He loved that she would start crying at the Wonka movie near the end, unashamed about feeling overwhelmed by the backstory.

If he weren’t so afraid she didn’t love him, he would tell her. He knew it had only been a few weeks, that all logic points to love at first sight being nothing more than him just getting turned on by her appearance. But how could he not love her when she sat in bed with him like this after making him a cup of coffee before the sun had even risen? How could one resist the gentleness of her touch when they watched TV together and she insisted on holding his hand? How could he be expected to watch her hyper fixate on a book or a video game, talking about it for hours on end with so much passion she always ended up wound up and breathless?

“You’re too sweet for me,” he told her as he laid back against the head board. He gently pulled her into his side, wanting to have her as close as humanly possible.

His words were met with an amused chuckle. She didn’t fight his hold on her, instead melting into him as though it was where she had always been.

“Tell me about your family,” she said quietly. “I mean, I’ve not been further than ten feet from you for weeks and you haven’t said the first word about them.”

He could feel his jaw clench as she asked him. His family was a complicated and sensitive subject. Even though he wished he never had to speak to her about them, he knew he had to if he had any hopes of them becoming more than just a passion fueled fling.

“Not much to really say. Dad ran Draconic Industries. My older sister, Rhaenyra, is my dad’s daughter with his first wife. He made her next in line to take over the business. Me, my younger siblings, even my mom, we never really mattered much to dear old dad. He died when I was nineteen. I don’t really matter much to any of the rest of them,” he told her, tracing shapes on her bare thigh as he spoke.

“I’m sure that’s not true,” she said quickly.

“It is,” he told her without any uncertainty. “Helaena, my younger sister, hasn’t spoken to me in a few years either. I haven’t spoke to my youngest brother Daeron since we were kids. And my brother Aemond…he was the last to hold out hope for me and I burned that to the ground a long time ago. I think it’s been at least a year. My mom completely disowned me about four years ago, when I was around twenty-two, cause I refused to go to rehab again.”

She frowned softly but said nothing. He could only imagine what was going through her head at this point. If roles were reversed, he would probably be planning his exit strategy. All it felt like he told her was a sob story about a poor rich kid who can’t live off mommy and daddy anymore. He felt pathetic.

“What did you go to rehab for?” she asked him.

“Started partying when I was like twelve. Alcoholic by age fourteen. Lead to worse shit, as it does, and I overdosed when I was eighteen on some coke. My mom and grandfather checked me into rehab the following week. Have done two more stints since. Never really stuck, and I haven’t been sober for more than a few days since I was like fifteen.”

He was laying in all our there for her. He wanted her to know so she could decide if she thought he was worth the trouble. He couldn’t blame her if she ran away from him. Why would she stick around? All of his family had washed their hands of him and they were family. She was just someone he met in a bar a few weeks before.

She stayed quiet for a long time. Longer than he would’ve liked. The silence weighed on his heart like an elephant pressing against his chest. He wanted to beg her to say something, anything, just so he knew where her head was at.

Though, he noticed, she didn’t move away from him. She stayed right there, comfortable tucked into his side, occasionally sipping her hot chocolate. His own mug, still filled with coffee, had gone near forgotten in his hand. He was too focused on her.

“You know, the opposite of addiction is connection. Watched a TED Talk one time about it. They found when addicts are treated like people instead of criminals, integrating them into society instead of isolating them, they show less of a struggle with addictions. Allow their basic needs to be met, give them a community, and they thrive,” she said softly after several moments.

She sat up, her warmth leaving him. He felt lonely without her touching him even though she was still well within arm’s reach. She was all he wanted, all he needed.

“I’m not saying I can fix you. I’m not saying the cure to all your problems is me giving my heart to you. I am, however, telling you that I haven’t once seen you drunk or high or anything and we basically haven’t been apart in weeks. If you want to develop healthy connections, create a community, be a person, I am more than willing to be part of it,” she said.

His heart started beating rapidly against his chest. He knew she was right. Since being with her, he hadn’t really felt the need for anything. He had physical cravings, sure, but no mental desire. Aegon didn’t want a moment with her to be a hazy memory that he may be able to recall when he's older.

“Why?” he asked her.

“Because I love you,” she said.

The weeks and months following that night, Aegon really put in the work. Y/N had made it clear to him that she was not going to just give him everything. If he wanted this, it was on him. She was only helping him.

Together, they had found a group therapy program for him. It was ran by a man who had gotten his psychology degree a few years before, but had struggled with addiction for most of his life. That was the first step, a step Aegon felt proud he had taken once he realized he didn’t feel so alone anymore.

The next step, he decided on by himself. The group program was all well and good, but he felt a need to find a deeper explanation into himself. Once a week he found himself sitting in a therapist’s office, talking about everything and nothing all at once. They spoke about his family, his self imposed isolation from them and how that lead to them cutting off, his hopes and dreams for the future.

Through this, he found out about opportunities for volunteer work in the community. He realized he quite liked working at the local secondhand store that helped people in need. He even brought her with him on the Saturdays he worked a shift, turning it into something they enjoyed together.

Even at work, he began reaching out more. If the opposite of addiction was connection, then by the gods he was going to make connections. His coworkers were enough to give him a good laugh. All of them were extremely proud of the progress he made, always encouraging him. He found that little bit alone made it easier for him to be more himself. In the conversations he was able to have with his coworkers, he talked about shows, movies, and music he liked and became friends with a few of them.

It was with this progress, along with the support Y/N provided, that Aegon found himself at the door of his family’s estate. He hadn’t been here in years. He knew all of his younger siblings still lived here. Helaena’s bright yellow VW Beetle sat parked in the driveway, Aemond’s motorcycle probably laid in parts in the garage, and Daeron had always been more content taking a town car than actually driving himself anywhere.

“You don’t have to do this, you know,” Y/N told him as she held his hand tightly. He had asked her to come with him so she could at least meet them. They needed to see how he had changed.

“I do have to. If for no other reason than to show them I’m not who they remember me to be,” he told her.

“Did you talk to Dr. Wilson about this? I mean, I just, I don’t want you to,” she said, trying desperately to find the right words. He silenced her with a kiss to her forehead.

“And I love you for it,” he said to her, holding her hand as tightly as she held his. “I’m okay with whatever happens in there.”

He knocked hard on the door. It wasn’t long before his mother answered. The ever looming presence of Alicent Hightower, never Targaryen, filled the entire space of the door frame. Her auburn curls were tied neatly back into a bun, her brown eyes widened in surprise.

The woman before him, despite being in her forties, showed no true signs of aging. There were no gray hairs scattered around her head, no fine lines or wrinkles. The only indication of a less than flawless appearance were the almost invisible lines that came from the outer corners of her eyes, put there by the fact that just like Aegon, her eyes would always squint up whenever she smiled.

“Aegon,” she said quietly. She looked at him like she saw a ghost.

“Hi, mom. Can we come in?” he asked her, biting his lip. Y/N gave his hand a small squeeze as if to remind him she was with him. He had her support every step of the way.

Alicent nodded silently and stepped to the side, allowing them entrance. The house was the same as the last time he was here. All of the old family photos hung on the walls of the hallway to the living room. The air smelled of cedar wood and spiced apples, giving it the perpetual scent of fall. It was warm and inviting, the plush couch so comfortable beneath him it was almost indicative of how much money his mother spent on it.

In a lot of ways, the house felt like his family. It was the epitome of warmth and love on first glance. When you looked closer, you could see how some of the picture frames were void of glass, having been broken in one family argument or another. There was a coat the hung on the same rack, day in and day out, hiding the hole where his head went through the wall in a drunken stupor. The paint on the walls were beginning to chip away, revealing the yellowing walls that proved how much his dad had liked to smoke. It was haunted, irreversibly scarred by the past.

A maid came around and asked the three of them if they wanted a drink. Alicent requested a glass of wine. Aegon noticed how surprised she looked when he just asked for a soda, like Y/N was having. He also noticed how she kept looking at his hand that held Y/N’s.

“And who is this?” She asked, nodding her head to Y/N.

“This is the woman I’m going to marry, Y/N,” he said confidently.

They hadn’t spoken about it, there wasn’t a ring on her finger. But he had no doubt in his mind that he would marry her. He was certain that she was who he was made for. The gods had her in mind when they designed him, knowing how much he would love her. She truly was his soulmate.

“And so you came to show her how terrible we all are?” she asked him, eyebrow raised. “Or did you come for money? Because you’re not getting a dime.”

“Neither,” he said firmly. “I just wanted you to see me, mom. I wanted to see you.”

She was surprised at his words. The last time he had spoken to her, he had been begging for money. Crying, begging. When she refused, trying to help him in the best way she knew how, he screamed at her about all of her faults. The last words he spoke to her was how he could only hope that he had the courage to kill himself before he turned into her.

“I’m sorry for…for everything,” he told her. “It wasn’t fair of me to blame everything on you.” Y/N squeezed his hand again. He looked down at their hands and he knew he was okay. He would be okay. “I’m like, eight months sober from everything. Not a drop of booze, no drugs. I have a full time job, I volunteer on the weekends at a secondhand store. I’m doing good, mom.”

Tears flooded to her eyes as she looked at him. Her oldest son, the first person she ever truly loved in a selfless manner. She had thought he was completely lost to her. The vicious creature he had been when they last saw each other had melted away entirely.

“Do you want to stay for dinner?” she asked him. He could only wordlessly nod, allowing her the time to stand from her chair and walk over to him. She hugged him tighter than she ever had.

He looked over Alicent’s shoulder at Y/N. The woman he loved was watching him with tears of her own, a smile on his face. She was good, too good, for him. She had opened his eyes to a reality he had been scared to face. But she had never once made him face it alone.

And that made all the difference.

#dividers by benkeibear #aegon targaryen ii #aegon targaryen x reader #mental health #recovery

[zensations35]

I Now Pronounce You Allergic (LSSR)

Yeahhh I FINALLY FINISHED IT!! I'm sorry it took forever but IT'S WORTH IT! Ahem...please enjoy Ren and Sasha's first totally-not-a-date where they BOTH find themselves allergic to the flowers at their friends' wedding--and then proceed to have a holdback challenge. Spice warning, yes there is snzfucking!

Skye helps me put the finishing touches on my makeup. I line my lids with blue and pink and a bold purple. 

“Is bi pride appropriate for a lesbian wedding?”

Skye laughs. “Abby won’t care. Kadie,” she trails off, “Who knows with her these days.” Skye clasps hands under her chin and coos. “You look gorgeous.”

Skye helped me pick out a subtly sexy midnight blue dress that I’d been eyeing for weeks but didn’t think I could pull off. It cups my skin so tight it’s like an aura as opposed to a dress.

“How many times have you reassured me about clothes?” Skye’s hand flicks toward my ass--I love the way my ass looks in this dress. 

I pair the dress with silver earrings and bracelet. A purple bandana wraps my hair, the bulk of it gathered in a neat bun at the back.

Skye’s face illuminates as she scrolls through her phone. “Ren’s almost here.”

“Are you sure about this?”

“Absolutely. I’m not wanted there--too much history--and! Leo has tickets to Excalion! I’d honestly rather be there.”

“Than your friends’ wedding??”

Skye’s brows rise, “Than an ex’s wedding who can’t stand me? Yes.”

“Fair point.”

Ren picks me up ten minutes later. He’s dressed not unlike he does when he goes to work. Suit, tie, vest, but…is that glitter on his cheek? Skye and I share a look and I see that ‘he’s so adorable’ look on her face. 

The venue is big--bigger than I expected from what Ren’s told me about one of the brides. Wide pillars, an archway the size of twelve Rens, marble fucking floors?? Who needs that??

Ren leads me inside and noise surrounds us, people chatting and laughing. I’m swallowed by sound and scents and--

My body turns to iron and I stop walking. Ren startles and looks at me with confusion. But my eyes are fixed on the tables. The tables with bright, purple, bushy…flowers. A very specific flower. 

“Ah,” Ren hums as if it makes complete sense. “Yes, I was afraid of this.”

I stare at the offensive flowers. If looks could shank you in a back alley, those flowers would be a crime scene. My lips pinch. The chatter around me numbs to a dull hum. Everything loses focus. 

The flowers start to warble and blur behind a saline lens. My sight is compromised. My nose sucks all of the energy out of my other senses. As if it’s putting on a damn light show.

I feel my lip twitch. I hone in on the tickle--the wretched sensation that’s going to ruin this whole experience. My lips form a crescent scrunch and I hear myself growl.

“Ahm…” Ren leans next to me. “Sasha?” he tips his head down to look at me and I jerk to the side. “Are you scrunching your nose?”

“No,” I say, but it comes out all congested and 100% unconvincing. 

Ren lifts his brows. “Hm. I see.”

“Hxsh-T!” 

His head snaps toward me as I recover and I feel my bones shrink. Fuck. I shoot him a don’t say a word look and he clamps his lips shut. “No. You saw nothing.” I refuse to let this be a thing. Even though, as we head toward our table, I find it overflowing with the atrocious bouquet and--

“Hyk-TSH-iah!” I snuffle and wipe my eyes with my fingers. Ren hands me a cloth napkin and I try not to glare at him as if this is his fault. 

We’re seated at a four-person table and across from us are two other people. One of them is a very tall, very burly woman who could be on the cover of a weight lifting magazine. Her slinky copper hair is fluffed at the top and pulled into an amalgamation of a ponytail-slash-braid. I can’t imagine an actual salon doing that to her, so it was probably a homemade hair concoction. 

The man she’s seated next to is…significantly smaller. Like, he looks so thin, I’m pretty sure a medium-sized breeze would knock him over. His wrists are bony and I think I see a purple bruise in the crook of his elbow. He also has a cloud of red curls and a matching spray of freckles dotting his face like the woman does. 

I feel my nose threatening to misbehave again and I instinctively look for the champagne. There’s a glass in front of me next to a sheet of paper for each table setting. I inspect it closer and my stomach flips. 

It’s a bingo sheet. There are things like ‘brides kiss without prompt’, ‘Anne talks about her beanie babies’, and--

“Ren sneezes during the best man speech?” the burly woman blurts in a thick drawl. A throaty cackle burst from her, not unlike that of a hyena. “Do you see this, Ikka?” she prods at the text, nudging the man next to her. 

“Please, Iris,” His voice is rich and dull at the same time, accent a strange twang, as if he spent time in the UK and Texas, but not enough to fully form either accent.  

“It’s just funny, right?” her cheeks dimple with a grin. Her voice is raw and boisterous as if she really is finding everything hilarious. 

My eyes fall back onto the phrase: Ren sneezes during the best man speech. It’s right up top. What..the…heck, vanillas?

As if on cue, I hear the raspy intake of air right next to me. And the table jolts as Ren’s knees knock into it at the same time he jerks into a rigid, “HxSZg!” 

I flush and can’t help my eyes rounding. Oh gods…him too?? 

He flashes me a sheepish look and rakes a finger against his nose. “I think we will get at least one point.”

I snort, “You did not…”

Another keening cackle from the lady across the table. “Oh shit, Ikka! That’s him,” she gyrates her wrist toward Ren. She props her chin on her upturned palm. “Tell me, Ren,” she says with a mixture of mischief and amusement, “Do you sneeze a lot?”

The man next to her groans and rolls his eyes. “I am so sorry,” he says to Ren. “She thinks she’s hilarious.”

“Well, I am, ain’t I?”

“Ren!” a floaty voice perks us all up and I see one of the brides hurrying toward us. Her brown hair is braided in a ring around her face and her cheeks are sunny and dimpled.

“Abigail,” Ren stands and lets her scrunch him with a hug. She pulls back and takes his hands, brimming with joy. “I’m so glad you made it! Gosh! I was worried people wouldn’t come because there’s no ceremony but--Ah! Is that your…date?” her eyes flick to me. 

Ren gestures to me, “This is Sasha--Skye’s girlfriend. She is indeed in attendance with me.”

Abigail’s lips form a ring, “Oh, I see. Yeah, I’m so sorry about Skye, but,” she laughs awkwardly, “you know how Kadie is.” A knowing eye roll as her pink lips pucker.

Ren pats her hand, still attached to the V of his suit. “All is well. Skye is with our boyfriend Leo, seeing a concert.”

Abigail laughs uneasily. “Oh, well, good.” Her gaze warms. “I hope you have a good speech prepared. Kadie thinks you could get AI to write it and it would sound exactly like you.”

“I assure you, I did no such thing.”

My face is so tingly right now and I wish Abby would just leave so I can escape to the--

“SS-Ktsh!” I immediately shudder, arms wrapping around my midsection as I tuck my chin into my collar. Oh if I thought one was going to be enough--”Hit’SHKkk!” I was a fool. “Hax-SHIEU!” 

“Oh,” Abigail trails fingers over her chest. “Are you okay?”

I nod, eyes still squeezed shut, free hand roaming the table for the--

Cloth presses into my palm and I feel the brush of Ren’s fingers. “She is well, I assure you. We seem to be experiencing similar issues with,” he gestures to the bouquets. 

“Oh my gosh--I’m so sorry!” Abby coos. “Seriously, Kadie insisted, even though I said you were allergic. She was like, ‘he can just take a benadryl’ and I was--”

“It is quite alright, Abby. We are fine.”

“Are you sure? Because I think my grandma has Claritin?” 

I perk up, “C or D?”

“Uhh, I’m not sure but you could go ask her,” Abigail points to an elderly woman seated next to the bar, with an oxygen tank next to her.

“Uhhh, maybe,” I lie. I’m definitely not sneezing enough to beg an old woman for allergy pills. It’d be just my luck to get her talking about her own allergy journey. I swear anyone over 60 loves to talk about the pollen count. Ydjjjehhhh...my teeth chatter involuntarily.

“Well, just let us know if you need anything!” Abby trills and floats away waving her fingers as if she’s boarding a plane. 

I use the cloth to wipe my eyes again and blow out a frustrated breath. 

“Sasha…” 

I tip my eyes to Ren who looks nothing but concerned. 

“Are you uncomfortable?”

I sniff, shunting my gaze. 

“Please, be truthful.”

I puff. “Yeah, I am.”

“Then we shall leave.”

My shoulders lock. “What! No! These people are your friends! You’re the best man!”

Ren leans down, leveling his liquid blue eyes with mine.

“Sasha, out of everyone here, you are my priority.”

I flush, my heart thrumming through my chest and neck.

“Are you able to handle it?”

I twist the cloth between my fingers, “I don’t know.”

Ren leans over the table, facing to the side so all I see is the apex of his jaw. But he does that single-knuckle rub motion that always always leads to--

*snf* “Hh…” 

I slam my eyes shut and do my best to think of banjo music. 

“Hg-gk…hh-hih!”

And…he stops. His parted lips close. He exhales. Sniffles. Looks at his phone and scrolls like nothing happened. 

I gape at him, my stomach flipping with butterflies. “Seriously?” I snap loud enough for the other table to turn their heads. 

Ren looks at me, flabbergasted. “Was that wrong?”

“Yes!”

“So, I should have just…let it happen?”

“No!”

“Then…” Ren lifts his hands in a shrugging motion. I groan, burying my face in my hands, using it as an excuse to rub my own itchy nose with my palms. 

“Hmm…” Ren taps a pen on a piece of paper. He spins it around and scribbles on it.

Ren 1 Sasha 5

I peer at it, then him, eyes lidded with suspicion. “What the hell is this?”

“A game.”

“A game?”

Ren leans back, “Whoever sneezes the most loses.”

My brows shoot up. “Are you joking?”

“Not particularly.”

I drop back down to the paper. I feel a buzzing in my limbs, as if I’m preparing for a marathon. It feels…exciting? Oh fuck it. My lips tick up and energy rushes through me.

“You’re on, Grayson.”

He smirks.

Ren eyes my champagne glass and points a slender finger. “Do you need another?”

I frown at him, “Will you be okay if I…”

Ren softens. “I will be fine, Sasha. I have been sober for a while now. I am capable of restraint.”

I nod, “Then sure. But grab some strawberries too. And apples! And maybe…”

Snickers from across the table. I look over to see the fitness model laughing. She sees me looking and smiles, wide and warm. “Y’all are so cute!”

I blush and turn to Ren but he’s already standing to leave for the food table.

“Um,” I wrinkle my napkin and clear my throat, “So, how do you know the brides?”

She continues to smile, “I don’t.”

I pause, waiting but she doesn’t continue. 

“Alright, then your date does?”

She bursts into snorts of laughter, wide hands cupping her angular mouth, “Ikka,” she uses her elbow to nudge him and I hear him let out a tiny whine, “she thinks you’re my date.”

His lips crimp in amusement. “So did that other woman--the elderly one.”

My head spins like I’m being exorcized, “Wh-where?” 

“The lady,” he points to a plump graying woman currently a table away, scolding people there for something. Her hair is a curly swoop over her brow and I see at least four crosses on her ears and necklace. 

“Maybe we should play along,” the man, Ikka, says. “I don’t want to explain how we’re related.”

“We don’t have to go into detail, just tell her we’re half siblings.”

He drains his glass and rolls his eyes, “So she can ask why? No thanks.”

My ears prickle when I hear the so obvious sound my brain is fucking attuned for: hitching breaths. My eyes trail the room, searching, but I hear it before I see anything. 

“HkXGn! H-Gk’dsz!” 

It’s quiet, so miniscule I’m sure there are people at the buffet who didn’t even hear it. But I did. 

When Ren arrives and deposits the drink and plate, my lips quirk up, “Two points for you.”

He looks alarmed, “You heard those?”

A laugh bubbles in my throat, “I could hear them from another room, Lawrence.”

I hear the braying laugh as the burly woman claps her hands together. “I think Kadie did the seating, Kah!” 

“Iris, don’t fucking start--”

My left eye twitches. Apparently there’s wedding drama here that I want nothing to do with. I decide right then: I’m sticking to a small ceremony if I get married. 

Ren passes me a plate of fruits, “I was not certain if you wanted red or blackberries, so I took both.”

Iris’s pitched voice calls, “Why do you talk like that?” She’s looking at Ren and my heart sinks.

Ren’s cheeks harden, lines appearing on his forehead. A flare of familiar anger sparks in his eyes as his voice sharpens. “I speak this way so I do not speak,” his chin tips at her, “that way.”

My hand flies out to smack his, “Ren! That was extremely rude!”

He buries his lips in his teeth, eyes shiny from chagrin. He sighs, brushing a thumb across his glass, leaving a scar of condensation behind, “I apologize,” he says to the woman. 

To her credit, she just shrugs and resumes talking to her…brother? But I’m indignant for her. I glare at Ren and frown. “Ren, I get that you have trauma about your accent, but not everyone felt the need to change theirs. Don’t be a jerk.”

Ren nods, “Yes. You are absolutely correct.”

I nod and feel better. I was hoping that wouldn’t turn into an argument. I eat some of my strawberries and the sugar rush makes me kind of giddy. Until I forget where I am and take too big of a breath through my nose. 

My synapses light up and I taste panic hot on my tongue. I’m already tearing up, moisture running down my cheeks. My makeup I worked so hard on is smudging. Fuck. I fumble in my purse for clean tissues but I come up empty. What the hell? I always bring a pack everywhere. Whatever. Lost cause. 

I squeeze my fingers around my necklace to stop it from flopping but, “Hih-XSShh-ieh!” the sneeze rocks my neck, my shoulders. My chin yanks and my hand snaps the metal, the silver chain pooling around my wrist like a liquid snake. 

“Fuck!” I snarl but I’m not done, “Adj’SK!!” I sneeze viciously into the hand holding the chain, feeling the tang of iron on my lips. This can not get any worse. 

I throw myself to my feet, fingers steepled over my nose. Tears blur my vision as hitches flutter against my tongue, “Hhh-ieh! IEH!” My feet fly over the ground, carrying me so fast I stumble. At the same time I’m careening toward the ground, my lips sputter, “Hiex-SHIEEw- UGH!” 

Strong hands wrap around my shoulders and pull me straight up to a standing position so that I’m no longer about to flatten my nose on the tile. I blink away allergic tears as Iris beams at me. She doesn’t seem put off by my splotched, wet face at all. 

“You okay, sweetie?”

I mutter something unintelligible and then cough. “Uhm, kh, yes. I-I’m good. Thank you.” 

“No problem, doll. Can I escort you to the bathroom?”

“Oh, no I can get there fine.”

“I’m on the way myself, but I’ll wait if you need privacy.”

My wrists wag left and right, “Oh, no it’s fine!” My people pleasing ass overrides the need to be alone. “We can both go.”

I let Iris lead the way into the restroom where she takes a stall and I use the mirror to clean up. When she comes out of the stall I'm blowing my nose and apologizing every time I sniffle.

“Ikka gets sick a lot--snot don’t bother me,” she says as she washes her hands.

I titter with her but there’s no way I can explain my special brand of embarrassment. So I take some soft purple tissues and blow my nose. But just when I get it clear, the fire reignites, sending me spilling back into the fluff. 

“Ha-XSSH! Iee’TSHH-ieu! EiSHH!” I snort thickly, “Agh, whad the fugk?” 

Iris rorars a laugh and swipes the napkins, “Yall must be allergic to lavender.”

“Uh,” I sniffle, “Yeah. W--” I point at the cloth, “Are those…”

“Lavender scented,” her eyes shimmer with amusement and I flame bright. “Man,” she chuckles, stuffing the soggy tissues in the trash hole, “They really had it out for you two didn’t they?”

I groan and flick on the faucet. “Seems so.”

 “I can ask Ikka for unscented ones. He usually has some.”

I shake my head, “No-no, that’s okay, I…” I scrunch my nose and clamp my hands over my face. “I just need…a minute….”

Iris pops a shoulder, “Alright. Well, good luck.” She swaggers out of the bathroom, leaving me to my mess. I clean up as best I can and fix my makeup, spraying a setting liquid over it once I’m done. 

It’s been quite a while and I turn to head back, but the drinks swirl in my head and I pause. My eyes land on the stack of lavender tissues. 

I don’t think too hard about it, but I find myself stuffing a few into my purse before fleeing the scene.

When I get out of the restroom, I hear people calling “Toast! Toast!” and I see Ren standing up with a flute of sparkling water. 

I risk a glance at him staring smugly at me as he crosses the room, a cocky grin on his face.. He lifts a finger in the air and tapped the side of his nose before holding up 4 fingers.

Oh. It’s fucking on. 

I hurry to pass Ren him on my way to the table, digging in my bag.

“You’ll need these,” I don't meet his eyes as I stuff the tissues in his hand. I scurry away, shame leaving a hot trail behind me. I don't know why I did that--why did I do that?? I’m a godsdammed cheater, that’s why. 

I sit and watch as innocently as i possibly can. Ren stands iron straight at the front of the room, but his expression is soft, eyes twinkling in the chandelier lights. He addresses everyone and gestures to the brides on either side of him. 

“I met Kadie in college. We were good friends. She was always keeping me in line.”

A knowing chuckle hums across the room. An inside joke. Ren holds his arm toward, “Abigail let me crash on her couch for most of my young adult life.”

“Me and Leo,” she quips.

“Touche”. Ren lowers his voice for dramatic effect. “She had to kick me out quite often once she met Kadie.”

A ruckus of laughter at that. Abigail blushes but Kadie takes her hand, amused. Ren knows what he’s doing. Playing the crowd. Like a good DM. He begins the next phase of his speech but I can hear the hints of congestion stirring his words into a thicker drawl.

A few people have their bingo cards ready. I’d be lying if I wasn’t thinking about it. Ren pauses mid-word, breath ragged, fumbling in his pocket. 

“Apologies,” he croaks, “It s-hhh…seems you shall--snf! Have a bingo point af--” he folds one of the tissues over his nose, “Hk’TZZHHH!” 

“Ikka,” the woman at our table rasps, “Quit staring and mark it down!” 

My brain pushes their convo aside. I watch Ren’s nose, his chin. Bobbing up and down with each hitch, inhale, sigh. Eyes lock onto him as if his hypnotic buildup has charmed the snakes of the show. 

“Hnng…” the silence in the room is as solid as a truck. I can’t speak for anyone beyond my line of sight but my entire table is watching him intently. Seriously, why are they watching so hard? Do vanillas just--

“Wait,” Iris points from me to the bathroom tissues. “Did you--”

I slam back my glass of champagne, ignoring the question.

“XsST-hieu!! EGSX-EIU!” Ren siffles thickly and dabs his nose but that’s only making it worse. 

Seven. 

I lift up, ready to fly to his defense, but Ren crumples the tissue with a sorrowful sniffle and tucks the pack into his breast pocket to finish the speech.

“My apologies. Or, perhaps not?” Ren draws another laugh from the crowd. 

Iris smacks the bingo sheet, “Focus, Icabod! We’re close to winning!”

Okay. I’m getting kind of sus here. Maybe I’m just in fet brain overdrive but I have to know. Ren finishes his speech and ambles toward us, flicking tears from his watery eyes and slumps into the chair with a groaning sigh.

“Ren,” I rasp when I’m safely close enough to him to prevent being heard from the others. “Hey!” I wrap my fingers around his tie and pull his neck down so I can speak with him. And wow this actually is hot. No wonder Skye does it so much. I wobble a little and ohhh gods I'm getting drunk. 

I release him once he’s nice and close and whisper, “Rub your nose.”

He jerks back, “What?!” 

I groan, rolling my head, “Not like that. It’s…it’s for science.” 

Ren follows my gaze to Icabod and he hums, “Ah.” He tips his head down and sniffles. He brushes the underside of his nose, slow and deliberate. His eyes flutter and he lets out an exaggerated gasp.

“Igh!! Hiiegh…”

I stare open mouthed for way too long. Christ he’s good at this. I’m about to just let him attempt a fake before I remember there was a point to this.

I sneak a look at Icabod and… our expressions could have matched 100%. He might even be drooling. Not that I blame him. Rens still going, toying around with teasing hitches and soft gasps. Gods what must that be like in bed? 

WHAT? I have clearly had too much champagne. 

I sneak another look at Icabod to see him staring intently at his fork. And his eyes flick toward Ren. And back to the fork. 

I am floored. The odds are insane. But I do know those two are friends of Skye. Or aquaintances. Maybe I’m not the only person she’s met online…

Two claps bring our attention to the floor and Ren stops his fake buildup in milliseconds with a soft breath and a quick nose swipe. The man should be an actor.

 “Alright everyone, we’re having a freeze dance competition. Now, pick your partners, and dance! When we blow the whistle, you’re gonna freeze! Don’t. Move. Any movement, intentional or not, will disqualify you for the prize.”

“What’s the prize?” I ask.

Ren glides up next to me, knuckling his nose, “I do not think it will matter.”

I open my mouth to ask him why, but that’s a dumb question. His watery eyes and the buzzing of my own nostrils I’m desperately trying to ignore would destroy us both.

“Maybe it’s for the best we sit out. I can’t even dance.”

Ren looks astounded. “You cannot dance?” 

“I…no. Not like…ballroom dancing.”

“Then,” he holds out a hand, “I shall teach you.”

I pause. Dancing is Skye and Ren’s thing. I feel like this would be an intrusion of their sacred custom. But Ren waggles his fingers as if groping for my hand. “Skye will not mind.”

How does he read me like that?

He takes me by the hand and pulls me immediately into a spin. I’ve seen him and Skye do this enough that I don’t stumble. I may not have participated before, but I’m far from a dance virgin. 

We dance the intro of the song for a couple minutes, and I can’t keep the smile off my face. I feel so dashing in my sexy dress, tearing up the floor like this. 

Ren cradles my back, hands strong and gentle as he dips me low. My head tilts back and I’m overwhelmed by the scratchy scent of lavender. A busboy passes by carrying another bouquet. I jacknife upright, palm flattening my lips and nose as two very not stealthy sneezes wrench my spine, “Hiex-SHEW! HAAh-TSHHieu!” 

Ren lifts me and swirls us, dancing uninterrupted. I gulp air and glower, “That was cheating!” 

“It is not cheating. I am within the boundaries of the rules we set.”

“We didn’t set any rules!”

Ren smirks knowingly. I honestly have no room to complain though. I cheated first. 

“Freeze!” the voice rocks adrenaline into my veins and we both instinctively still. Ren’s hands are on the small of my back and propped on my hip; my arms are draped over his shoulders, one palm spread behind his neck. 

It feels so intimate. And…I swallow, my body reacting to him already. 

It’s about to get much more intimate.

His face is flushed so pink I’d think he was drunk. His teeth grind and he snarls a hitch. “Sasha,” his breath is hot and moist, barely audible but bold enough to send wracking shivers down my spine. “I am not…going to last…”

Oh gods. He did not just say that. 

Abigail moves toward us. Fuck fuck! What are we going to do? Ren’s nose scrunching isn’t doing the trick, and if he sneezes on me, I’m going to lose my goddamn mind. 

His fingers tighten on my waist as he sucks in a breath, and I make a decision. My hand sweeps from his neck across his cheek, his skin hot as a brand, and my fingers close over his firm nostrils.

He exhales, relief shuddering through him, and I swear I absorb that shudder and feel it quaking my thighs. 

I’m. Grabbing. Ren’s. Nose. I’m grabbing Ren’s nose! In public! What the fuck am I thinking?? 

I could tell myself that I just want to win--that’s all this is. But I’ve been lying to myself for too long. I don’t give a flying fuck if we win this game. I wanted to touch him. To feel his nostrils twitch under my grip, his breath bathe my wrist--oh gods. My body is a livewire. I’m worried I’m going to vibrate myself off the dance floor. 

“Sasha,” he grunts, “you may release me.”

Electricity zings through my arm and I snatch my hand away as if burned. 

Ren’s eyes glitter and his mouth curves, “That rather turned you on.”

“And I think that rather turns you on.” My bold comment comes out of nowhere.

The corner of his lip ticks up, “Of course.”

I didn’t think I could burn hotter but my blood feels ten times heavier.

Asshole. Is he just picking at me like friendly banter…or does he…want me?

This isn’t the first time we’ve flirted with each other. Over the course of all our friendships, the on-off-on-off of all fucking four of us…it’s godsdamn exhausting. And it’s wearing me down--physically and emotionally.

Ren looks at me with those concerned furrowed brows. I want him to say the same thing. The same thing I’m thinking, feeling. I…I want…

A clap brings us out of the sexual deviancy of the moment and Abigail calls, “That’s a wrap!” 

Abby glides toward us and squees. “You two were precious!” she trills. 

“Did we--” 

“You didn't win,” she frowns. 

“Erm, no, I know. But,” I fidget, coiling and uncoiling my fingers. “Did we embarrass ourselves?”

Abby chuckles. “Not at all. The other competitors were thrilled--” Abby poked Ren’s nose affectionately making his nostrils flare a bright pink. Why did that make me jealous?

Ren steps forward, leading Abby as she chats about ….

“Please just do this one thing for me, please!”

“W-what thing?” 

“The entire guest list has been taking photo booth pics so we can scrapbook it all vintage like. Will yall participate?” Abby begs.

Ren’s lips twist. “Alright. Of course. For you.”

With a squeal from Abby, we are ushered into a long hall, wider than average. It’s filled with nostalgic photos of celebrities like Elvis, The Beatles…is that Shirley Temple?? Did they even have photo booths back then? Oh gods, this whole fucking hallway is a beacon for how bad I am at history. 

In a misshapen nook sits a photo booth. A fancy one--it has a door and everything. Wow. Kadie went all out with this reception. I’m assuming she wanted to wow her guests to make up for having to univite them to the actual ceremony in 2020.

With some nudging, Abigail watches us climb in and shoots me a thumbs up. “I gotta go kiss ass to my mother in law but it’s pretty self explanatory. Take some funny ones! I’m making a scrapbook!” 

Ren is already inside and when I climb in, I find it more spacious than I expected, but not enough for us to sit side-by-side. I may have a smaller waist, but Ren has bulk in his thighs and shoulders that just won’t work. 

“Well,” I say, “I guess I’ll sit on your leg, if that’s ok.”

Ren nods and shifts so I can perch near his knee, pulling my dress down in a habitual need to unbunch my clothes. I slide over his leg and catch myself when his fingers curl around my hips to steady me.

“Is this alright?”

“Yeah, thanks,” I resume shifting. We look at the screen in front of us and I squint, searching for the switch to activate it. “Where…” we start fussing around, both seeking the mechanism but coming up empty. 

I groan, “Why is something so vintage so hard for us to figure out?” I feel the edge of anger on my tongue, “It’s so different from every phone booth I’ve used.”

“As opposed to the many phone booths you’ve been in?”

“I was young once, Ren. In the 90s. So, yes.”

“Hm,” he chuckles. “Were they…” the word drops, thickening with dull congestion that makes my spine straighten like a steel rod. I jerk to the side, putting the shadows of his jawline in my peripheral. 

“Are you…” I swallow a desert in my mouth. 

He rubs a lip under his teeth, “Would it be better for me to say yes, or no?”

“What does that mean?”

“It m-means…” his words begin to stumble, “If denying I am not hhh--” his long fingers climb to his face, sawing languidly under his nose. 

“Worse.”

“Then, my nose itches and I hhh--believe I might--hh-igh…sneeze.”

I flush hot and oh, I was wrong. That phrase was so much worse. Better. Augh I am absolutely incapable of untangling the mess of emotions flooding me like a rainstorm. I feel myself squirm, the photo switch forgotten in lieu of, “Ren…”

I feel his hand on my hip tightening--exactly the same way it did on the dance floor. Oh gods…if there was any doubt, it’s gone: flung out the window. 

He’s going to sneeze. I’m on his lap. Fuuuuuck. 

“Ren,” I feel my throat grate against his name, “I should go, I--”

“I will be fine,” he sniffles and his head does a small shake that makes my spine melt. His voice is honey, “It’ll pass.” 

A contraction. He’s really fucking trying.

“Uhh, I don’t think it will,” I say flatly.

“I can…handle it. Trust me.”

“Trust me,” I wiggle to stand but my knees tangle and I end up slipping back, falling into him. His hands wind around my middle, one thumb skimming the slit decorating my hip. 

“Ah-apologies, I--” 

I should try to get up again. I know I should. But his grip is firm, steady, as if I’m his anchor in a storm. I hear him sniffle right in my ear and gods I shiver from head to toe. It makes my shoulders wring, my stomach thrum, and my thighs…

I hear him gasp and feel his hips rock forward. He lets out a small moan and I realize I’ve squirmed myself to the ridges of his lap. And Oh. Fuck, this fabric must be so thin because I can feel exactly how my arousal is affecting him. 

“Hh-ieh--” He squeezes my body so hard a small gasp flees my throat. 

“Mmmmhh--!” there is no way the sounds I’m making are even remotely adjacent to ‘stop doing that please’. My body is in camp sneeze right now. 

“Hhh-ngh, Sahh…” His breaths come in grinding gasps and I’m not sure anymore if it’s from holding back the sneeze or my ass rubbing against his cock. 

I’m too hot for this. I’m too horny for this. The unbelievable tension and teasing of the night all crashes into me in frantic, thought-erasing need. 

I can’t remember why this is a bad idea. I can’t remember that we’re in a public fucking place, in the middle of a wedding reception and it’s Not A Good Time. My panties are slick and wet, and I do more than wiggle--I writhe. Noises escape me in high pitches half breaths, matching his liquid gasps escaping his tilted mouth.

“Hhh-iehh--HEh!” 

I could stop this. I could get up. I could launch myself out of this photo booth as if I were a champagne cork and Ren wouldn’t stop me. But I don’t want to stop.

My back arches when I feel his head dip far enough for his nose to feather the skin of my neck. Oh fuck ohfuckohfuck-- My senses narrow to that spot, everything dulling around me as his lips pop apart, still buried in my neck, and--

“HGX-SHHZ!” 

Pleasure explodes inside of me. My body bucks and I ride him, rubbing myself back and forth over his trapped cock in a rocking motion. 

“Hieh--”

“Oh fucking gods!” 

“HY-ESHHUUU!” 

My orgasm unleashes, wracking my body, lighting every nerve inside me, pulling closed-lipped moans from my throat. “Mmmnn-gods fuck MMMNnnn!” My hands are clawing and scrunching any fabric they can get at--from the folds of my dress to Ren’s taut pants. He moans against me and I hear him swear, “F--uck…” 

My body collapses against him and I suck in air, my chest pulsing in time with my labia. He’s still hard against me, fingers delicate but firm as he sniffles thick and wet. 

“S-Sasha,” he grunts, “I…”

“Oh my gods.” My heartbeat turns from pounding to racing. 

We just dry humped in a wedding photo booth!

My hands slap my face. “What the fuck am I doing?” Gods, I must be so--

“Sasha,” Ren’s hand squeezes my shoulder. “If you permit me to leave first--”

“No,” I say quickly, tugging my bra strap back in place and smoothing my wrinkled bandana. “Anyone who overheard just heard me m-moaning and…you, uhh…”

“Sneezing?”

“Y-yeah. But that could have been me, and…”

Ren concedes, though he doesn’t look convinced. “As you wish.”

I don’t need him to believe me, I just need to get out of here. Now.

Hoping my makeup made it out unscathed, I crawl out, opening the door--thank gods there’s a door--and sliding out, eyes darting around to see if anyone is nearby.

“Hey there.” 

I freeze, my entire body jolting with panicked adrenaline. I turn to see Kadie staring at me, arms folded over her wide bosom, lips askew. Sparks in her sage eyes.

I flap my hands nervously, “I was just--” 

“I know what you were doing.” Her voice is firm but there’s a hint of a roguish gleam. 

My blood ices. “No, you don’t understand.”

She silences me with an upturned palm. “You do know I dated Skye, right?”

My jaw unhinges. Of course. Of fucking course she knows. She could probably see it all over my face all godsdamn day. 

My hands close over my face, “Oh my fuck,” I muffle. 

Kadie sighs, a heaving breath, “Look, I really don’t give two shits what you did in there. But I’d better not have to clean anything up.” At my alarm, she pressed the air with her hand, “Chill. No one else knows, or heard you. Just me.” She hands me a slim rectangle of paper. “Maybe watch the switch next time. You’re lucky I was here.”

She whirls and leaves me clutching three stacked images--muted and gray but there’s no doubting what’s going on in there. If I focus, I can see my O-face. IeeHHGGG. 

I crumple the pictures as Ren climbs out, brushing wrinkles from his suit. “What happened?” he asks.

I look at him, “Kadie heard us. And…saw…” I crunch the photos again for good measure. 

“I see.” Ren rakes a forked hand through his hair and it flops back over his brow with enviable ease. “Perhaps then, it is an opportune time to--”

“Bail?” I snort, “Sorry, I shouldn’t…”

“Yes. Bail.”

My chin juts up at him in confusion.

We make it out without being noticed. Ren even finds us a bathroom on the other end of the building to freshen up. I make sure to slather myself in deodorant. Everywhere. Yes, even my stomach and thighs. My underwear didn’t make it out unscathed. I pull my track pants out of my bag and go commando.

I have a tube top as well and I trade it for the dress. Now I look like I’m about to go to yoga but at least I don’t look like I just snzfucked a guy in a photo booth. 

In the hall, Ren is still wearing his suit. “You didn’t bring extra clothes?”

He pats his vest in various places as if to say and where would I put them?

I roll my eyes. “Whatever. I’m ready to get--HXST-Ieh! Out of here.” I grind my palm over my nose, furious it hasn’t finished with me yet.

Ren opens his palm and offers it to me. “As you wish. However, I have one more stop to make.”

We hurry toward the exit, not encountering any obstacles before we burst out into the windy air like a prison break. Ren and I lock eyes and let out twin snorts. 

“I’m impressed you kept your erection during that whole fit,” I giggle. 

“Years with Skye has tempered me. At this point I find myself sporting a partial even when I start to…”

 Oh fuck that’s hot.

I drink in the crisp air, hoping it’ll cool me off. I breathe deep and we head toward the car. 

We’re still sniffly on the drive. Allergy aftermath can last hours if you marinate long enough. Ren drives us to a strip center just downtown. He parks at a meter right outside, “A book store?” I drink in the cottagecore awning and the chalkboard sign announcing an author signing.

An author I know.

Anita Maez?!

Ren looks at me, smiling. Not smirking. Not grinning. Just…smiling. 

“Your ticket is anonymous,” he says, “If you do not wish to enter, no one will know you withdrew.”

My eyes are wide and I feel my heart set up camp in my throat. “Ren…” I swallow through the thickness. He remembered my favorite fucking author and made a point to buy me a ticket to meet her?? 

He hands me the ticket and I take it, unable to tear my eyes away from it. I virtually stumble toward the building, only pausing to look at Ren to make sure he’s really okay with this. He nods and waits outside to give me privacy.

In line, I can’t stop thinking about Ren. The lengths he went for me today. For me. My brain is a bonfire. It’s becoming very hard to not look for meaning in tonight. Ren, making up a game for us so I don’t freak out sneezing in public. Making sure I was comfortable the whole time with all of the weird conversations. How utterly safe I felt in that booth with him. I’ve only felt that safe with Skye and Leo. 

And now this. 

Is he doing these things for me because we’re friends? Or is this just Ren being…Ren? I realize I don’t know, really. I know him as a friend. As Skye’s lover. As Leo’s primary. But I can’t tell if he wants us to be closer or if he just does this kind of thing. 

 I send a quick text to Skye, but then it’s my turn for the meet and greet, and I shove all those thoughts aside to meet my hero.

Ren isn’t outside the shop when I exit but I peg his location instantly. He’s down the sidewalk near a corner, sneezing his head off.

I start counting, unable to help myself from lining my footsteps with each sneeze. He stops, finally, and sniffles, patting his nostrils with a purple tissue--oh. Those tissues. 

I rush over and snatch it from him, earning me a bewildered look between sniffles. “What--”

“Those are lavender scented,” I flush at his expression. “They’re…causing more problems than solving.”

Ren chuckles and shakes his head. “Well, that does explain quite a lot.”

I pop my hip and place a hand on it, “So, what are we at?” I tease. “After your whole,” I fan my fingers around his face. 

“Mmm. Seven. But as we are not specifically at the venue, they do not count.”

“Um, they absolutely count, Grayson. We didn’t set any rules, remember?”

He has the gall to look defeated right before he tips his head in a bow. “Very well. The final count is?”

“Me with 13, you with,” I grin smarmily, “16.”

“Hm,” he hums. “Would it be a stretch to say your author signing is your prize?”

“Fuck no. First, you had that planned before the game started. Second, I didn’t ask for it, third…” I stop ticking my fingers when I see the mischievous look on his face. The streetlamps have caught his eyes so they look like they’re dancing. And he’s somehow maneuvered his arm above his head, propping himself into one of those ‘hot boy’ movie leans the lead love interest always does.

I bite back a snort. Is he flirting? Is he doing the sexy man pose on purpose? 

“What, Sasha, would you like your prize to be?”

I want to laugh and cry and tell him he looks silly and obvious. That he’s not as sexy as he thinks he is. Even if it’s a godsdamn lie. He would have won if I hadn’t counted what happened outside here--another result of my cheating our game. And he still let me pick the prize. 

And what do I even want?

You.

The thought comes unbidden. Immediate. I want him. I want him the same way I want Skye and Leo. I want to throw our dynamic into the trash and just…be together. All of us. A true collective polycule.

I can’t tell if he heard me, but it’s obvious he knows what I’m thinking. My throat bobs. Fear grips my heart tight. What if what if what if-

Ren is closing the distance between us and I can feel the pull of his heat. My body is like a magnet, my thighs ablaze trying not to just crush him with my--

Down girl. You already went on that ride.

He’s over me now, his lips bowed and crimped. 

“What,” he rasps, the heat of his tone melting my resolve, “would you like, Sasha?”

Fuck it. Fuck all of it. I grab his tie and pull his face down toward me. His upper body jerks forward and he careens down--gods, no wonder Skye does this so much--and I kiss him. His lips are soft and strong and completely devastating me.

It doesn’t matter that I’ve technically kissed him before. This is our first kiss. An earth-shattering, lava-forming, creating new continents kiss. 

 He lets me lead him, his tongue flicking my lower lip, asking permission, and I invite him in. 

Vaguely aware of his hand on my waist, fingers wrapping and scrunching my shirt.

He lets out a small moan into my throat and all rational thought vanishes.

Fuck. I love him. I love them all. Skye, Leo, Ren. And it hardens my bones, softens my heart, steels my mind. 

This is how it was meant to be.

160 miles away

Backstage, the music is muffled. Skye and Leo are standing awkwardly, Skye shifting from left to right, eyes wide and focused on the yellowing floor beneath them. 

Leo’s lips drop and his heart pounds. “Are you…okay?”

Skye gives a half hearted nod as she pulls out her phone and reads the screen, illuminating the pink of her cheeks.

Leo looks up, toward the flashing lights ahead where the roar of the crowd coats the night. “I hope Ren and Sasha are having more fun than we are.”

Another nod, Skye’s chin jerking down. Leo hears a small hiccup disguised as a sigh. She pockets her phone and looks at him, something lighting her eyes in a way that makes him uneasy. 

“You ready for this?” she asks.

Someone screams ahead and both of their heads whip toward it. Skye’s hand closes around Leo’s, squeezing. 

“I think that’s our cue.”

To be continued…

#this took me a whole fucking year to perfect #and no it's not perfect #but i had hella fun writing it and OH BOY DID I GET INDULGENT #I've never been this FUCKING UNHINGED #I almost launched myself into SPACE writing this one #and the companion fic with Skye and Leo is in the works now soooo #I left yall with a lil tidbit to look forward to~ #please please tell me if you liked it omg i need to know that year paid off #ahahaha ok! ENJOY!! #LSSR #snz #snzfucking #snzfucker #snz kink #fet!characters #snzfic #oc ren #oc sasha #allergies #OH BY THE WAY I THREW IN A COUPLE NEW OCS I'M PLAYING WITH #WHO MIGHT MAKE A DEBUT ON THEIR OWN TIME #REHREHREHHH #zen fic #zen ocs

[matsukaah]

•KimetsuOlymp AU

After so long cooking, here is my dish delivered to you. This is an AU (alternative universe) involving the Greek mythology of Olympus. I will remind you that the relationships between characters do not follow those of the gods of mythology 🤏🤓

I really liked it, it was fun and I hope it's to your liking, any mistake, spelling or coherence, I apologize ‼️

Maybe I'll write something about it, I just need time, I'm a born procrastinator

●How was it conceived? (and how he is Ume's brother)

(Purahahime is a name invented to refer to Gyutaro and Ume's mother)

The Purahahime was a woman of low status on Olympus, she could live her life without worries, but she craved too much to be praised by a good-looking God. She wanted to impress him anyway, she was nothing extraordinary, so she decided to have a child, even if it wasn't his, if it was strong enough it would definitely attract attention, that all the deities would know its name. She tried several times before Gyutaro began to be prepared, in better words, cursed, with the most diverse plagues so that his abilities would go to the limit, without thinking about what his body would end up looking like. The result of the various experiments, it was already a miracle that he was able to be born, but his appearance was deplorable, like a dark and soft amalgam.

Purahahime didn't see the value in him, she considered killing him, but he was too strong for her unhappiness (or happiness?). Not ending his life proved advantageous, as it worked, the man believed that the reason for Gyutaro's strength was his mother's womb, even if it was grotesque. Thus, Ume was conceived, unfortunately unlike her brother she was born stunning, even as a child deities stopped their work to appreciate her, but she was weak compared to her brother, which angered her parents, neglecting them both.

Eventually Purahahime was killed by the man she loved, he believed he had been tricked into blaming her for his daughter's weakness. Currently he has found other women, not bothering to look at any of the children. Gyutaro initially felt envious, surely if he had that smooth skin or that white hair he would be congratulated just for being born. But she won his heart, since they share the same cruel blue eyes (Gyutaro has them, but normally keeps his haunting eyes, with yellow sclera and green irises with red interior), they are miserable, just like her and him, so that he decided to take care of her.

•What type of role does he perform?

Gyutaro is the God of iron, he would be perfect for a guard due to his strength, but he preferred it this way. Being the most skilled craftsman Olympus has ever seen, his story of suffering, humiliation and hard work teaches that not all Greek gods had that gentle life on Olympus.

●What is his relationship with the others on Olympus?

He detests several people, especially Tengen, the God of wine and parties, he continually throws his festivities that for Gyutaro feel like the ground is shaking, his sensitive ears making his head pound in pain, making it impossible for him to work. Also due to envy, he is always surrounded by his three wives in addition to the countless number of nymphs and goddesses who aspire to the position of “wife number four”, in his words.

Tanjiro, the son of the Sun, just how he screams irritates him a lot, but he doesn't hate him, it's just unpleasant how he always manages to break the divine artifacts that Gyutaro prepares with so much care, the way Tanjiro is always friendly and always smiling is intimidating too , his eyes seem to stare into Gyutaro's soul, he would destroy him if Tanjiro's younger sister wasn't Ume's close friend.

Ume, she uses the pseudonym of several names, but Daki is the most used, she is considered the concept of beauty. Gyutaro loves his sister, but he can't help but think that she was drawn with care by the gods and looks like he was a sketch made by a boar with a brush in his hand. Raising her was a difficult task, but he made sure she lacked nothing, if she felt hungry, would he hunt, new clothes? he steals and sews until she feels satisfied. Even when she blossomed into the beautiful flower she is, she never left her brother out of her life, insisting that he accompany her to parties and speaking highly of him to everyone he interacts with, even if he feels anxious about the attention she brings. , usually hiding on benches behind the pillars, just enjoying wine.

Obanai and Mitsuri, they are always together since they date. Gyutaro likes Obanai, his hair full of snakes managed to make them identify with each other, in addition to the various types of exotic requests he makes, such as pure pure ornaments for his loved one. Mtsuri talks to him when Gyutaro visits Obanai, sometimes trying to marry him, which doesn't work, to the point where he started to reject her, but appreciates her good intentions.

He has some other relationships, but he doesn't keep in touch with them, as he doesn't usually leave his work area, which is also his home.

●How does his body work?

It seems difficult, but the parts harmonize complicatedly, curved horns like those of a buffalo, to protect its bat ears, which are super sensitive to sounds, but this makes its head weigh too much, having to cut them frequently until they grow back to the point of bothering him.

His ears accurately hear everything around him, especially the tinkling of metal, knowing whether or not it is of good quality, he has learned to recognize the sound of people and other creatures and differentiate them. Sometimes they turn them down to muffle the sound, partially working.

His eyes have this monstrous tone, despite having them normal, blue and white sclerae, but they are sensitive and do not see in the dark as he likes, his usual green and red eyes imitate those of reptiles and cats, he hates light, he feels like he is going go blind if you stay in the sun.

Legs are heavy, being mixtures of several types of animals, being fast and strong, but heavy, he avoids moving, as it leaves him exhausted and sore.

An amusing detail is that because of this large amount of blood mixture involving bovine animals, when he feels irritated he unconsciously drags his feet on the ground like a bull

He has a small snake tail, Chioi, a black snake with purple eyes, he has deceptive abilities, disturbing the senses of anyone who looks at him, he loves to pretend to have five heads like a hydra, people's look of terror makes them both laugh.

His blood has a corrosive poison, protect yourself under your fingernails, but if his blood is ingested it will have the same effect.

Gyutaro has a deformed body from birth, but he eats little of everything his body needs, leaving him weak. However, he eats “enough” to stay upright and working.

It's the same things said above, but in image form, I thought it was super cute and decided to keep it🫡‼️

and of course, my oc Matsu no au, they are my babies‼️‼️‼️

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #kny #gyutaro #digital illustration #gyutaro shabana #kny oc #mk.art #oc #gyutaro x oc #Matsu Kibo

[aheathen-conceivably]

Ok so I read the post on your thoughts on Gio and the American Dream and I hate to say it … as an immigrant, I understand him.

I also come from a culture where women tend to their male partner's needs and I don't believe he wants to turn Jo into a subservient wife. He fell in love with a lively, free, and wild Jo and loves that aspect of her.

At the end of the day she loves him too so why would she leave? I understand she doesn't like to be dependent of him but where else would she go? There are no parties or glamour, which was her whole thing, anymore. At least the farm offers stability in the economic crisis.

Point is, I understand Gio as an immigrant, but don't understand Jo as a woman.

BABES! We’ve got another one…

(As in me being touched and having no other means to say how much I love y’all takes other than to give them a standing ovation in GIF form).

But you know…there’s a whole lot to break down here, friend, especially about Jo. I think you know what that means! Under the cut we go….

First and foremost, I very much appreciate you saying you understand that aspect of Gio. I did in part write him as a commentary on the immigrant experience in America (filtered through his own personality/character of course), and so to know that is relatable means a lot to me. I don’t think it’s a spoiler to tell y’all his journey is far from over, and you can already see the cracks in his outlook beginning to form. Whenever Jo is depressed he says this quite vividly:

Because you are very, very correct. This isn’t about molding Jo into some subservient housewife, or even eroding those exact qualities that he loves in her. This is about Gio attempting to square what he’s been taught/believes will bring his life happiness and meaning with his own experience and emotions. It’s about the myth of the American dream and the perfect housewife and the very real struggle of those things existing as actual, lived realities.

Because at the root of it, Gio is amalgamating an understanding of his own family unit and what he knows he doesn’t want in this country. He has seen another methods of “making it” in America, and so he thinks if only he can make the “right” choices, he can avoid that, and become the respected and happy man that he wants to be.

Now onto Jo, boy oh boy, Jo….

I think one of the core misunderstandings here is that Jo wants stability. This is kind of the crux built into her desire for control and her never-ending failure to achieve it. She wants to control her surroundings, to make sure nothing and no one can hurt her, but she also wants to feel in a way that is hard to find in a stable, heavily domesticated life. On the flip side, despite whatever imaginary dream Gio has, he’s the same way. They both want a life filled with excitement and new experiences, new people and rushes of emotions. This is one of the ways they differ heavily from Antoine and Zelda.

Now on one level, this is simply the way Josephine is. She’s high energy, fun loving, and insatiable. But on a deeper level, this is tied into her experiences not only as a woman, but as a daughter. She has a brief moment of clarity in that last post where she realizes:

Now I have chosen not to go too in-depth on Josephine’s trauma, but you can see her lay out the course of events here and also her deep hesitation to any of it here. Josephine is still only a teenager in that second post. Her mother not only told her things like that (“this is the weight that prejudice and expectation have placed upon us”) but also “what do you want to be then? Some glorified maid to a man?” (Which, frankly, I can write another Ted Talk about the juxtaposition here, but I think ya'll can pull some threads).

So when you see Josephine’s struggle with control, this is heavily rooted in bodily autonomy. Now all things considered, Josephine has managed to make great strides toward reclaiming this and reasserting not only her sexuality, but also her sense of self in her body. Gio knows this. We see him recognize and respect it quite clearly in that last post. He’s been part of that process for her, and that only adds another element of love, trust, and safety between them.

But on a fundamental level, neither Gio nor Josephine has made the connection between that trauma, her own personality, and why she hates her life now so much:

Here’s the issue right now: Josephine doesn’t feel like she’s living her own life. We have seen how she would like to live in the 20s not just in the parties and glamour, but when she was managing bands. She wants to be fulfilled professionally, through helping people/places she believes in and bettering her own life by bettering theirs. That’s how she gets her joy, and that’s what she would chose to do if given the chance.

And right now, she does not feel like she gets to chose. You’re correct in that part of that is coming from the current economic situation. Again, she sees that herself here. She knows what demons are waiting outside her window, and how easily poverty can make them rearise. That only makes it worse. It doesn’t make the smell of bread (domestic security) any better or more comforting. It makes it bitter, because she didn’t chose it. She was backed into a corner by circumstance (and, as she can sense, by the choices men made for her without telling her), and now she feels like she can’t say no. That’s her ultimate trigger.

Now whether or not that loss of control is simply perceived, or should be offset by how “lucky” she is to be in a stable position in such precarious economic times, we might all have different options on. Even more, I’m sure each of us would answer differently for ourselves in that situation. I know I would. But for Josephine? Not only is this a life she will never find joy in, because even without her trauma, she is an ambitious, restless, and outgoing person with different goals for herself; but that added memory and pain makes her reaction to it all the more volatile.

Perhaps most importantly, Jo feels as though her life is being controlled again, whether by Gio, the reality of the world outside her window, or by her own guilt/love that makes her feel beholden to the people around her (just like it did to her mother). Because you’re right, she does love him. She wouldn’t leave because she doesn’t. If she leaves now, it would leave because she panicked, because she feels like she’s lost all the autonomy she worked so hard to regain and she’ll never feel the fulfillment she felt when she was successfully independent ever again. That’s the element I hope we can understand, even if it’s not what we would do.

#okay THAT might be my longest Ted Talk yet 🤣 #which if you’re actually reading you really deserve a tshirt let’s be real #and I’m so very sorry they’re so long #I try and infuse them into all the posts but like to condense it and write it all out clearly can be so helpful sometimes #for me too let’s be real #and like I want them to have a real solid base before we move into ~the great unknown~ #anywho there’s a number of threads I could have touched on here that I didn’t for ~time~ #but if you’d like to go through the #Josephine Duplanchier extra #tag there’s some good stuff there too 😉 #Giorgio Mistretta extra #also #*ahem* #does it REALLY offer stability in the economic crisis? #y’all remembering what I’m remembering? 😬 #ain’t a true American dream without a healthy serving of debt aint it

[silentcrowsilentravens]

Heya Raven! If you're still doing requests I'd love to see the the resident evil ladies (and maybe magnet man) with a fem!S/O who's basically Himiko Toga from My Hero Academia? Like drinking blood and becoming someone else and if they have powers being able to use them... I had a hell of a night last night. Power was out, no sleep, huge storm, sirens everywhere... I'd appreciate the comfort if that's ok

Hope everything's okay where you are. <3

I'm assuming you're talking about the RE 8 ladies, but if not, feel free to drop another message in my inbox. Cut Mia from this one since my character limit is 8, and she's technically a RE 7 lady anyway. Sorry, Mia.

Daniela Dimitrescu, Cassandra Dimitrescu, Mother Miranda, Bela Dimitrescu, Alcina Dimitrescu, Donna Beneviento, Elena Lupu, and Karl Heisenberg with a s/o who takes the appearance and powers of others after drinking their blood.

(Fem reader).

Warnings: blood, mentions of violence. 

Masterlists here!

Daniela Dimitrescu

So... If Daniela grabs a bottle of vintage and you drink a glass, you'll turn into the maiden whose blood was used to make it, right?

That's so cool!

The things the two of you could get up to together... The chaos!

What would happen if you drank the blood of multiple people mixed together? Will you only turn into one? Will you turn into one, then another? Will you become an amalgamation of them? Do you want to test it?

...Do you want to drink Daniela’s blood? Wouldn’t it be romantic if you both drank each other’s blood?!

(Everyone in the castle dreads days when there appears to be two Daniela Dimitrescus running around). 

(You can’t help it if being able to dissolve into insects is a fun time). (And Daniela can’t help it if her energy level is always cranked up to eleven). 

Cassandra Dimitrescu

Ooh, Cassandra's never been with a woman that drinks blood. She’s fairly excited when you tell her. 

I feel as though Cass isn’t usually into the idea of her partner drinking her blood, but if it’s you...? Go ahead.

Occasionally, she’ll try to bribe you to turn into a particular person because wants to screw with someone. 

The two of you do this thing where you borrow somebody else’s face and Cass tries to track you down. 

She gives you one of her knives. That way you always have a way to spill blood. : )

She won’t lie, there’s something particularly attractive about you when your face and clothes are smeared with red. 

Mother Miranda

Miranda deduced what your whole schtick is before you even told her, piecing together subtle accidental hints you dropped here and there.

Also, one time, she literally walked in on you downing one of the blood units she keeps in her lab.

You turned around, having taken on the appearance of a villager that’s now deceased. Your eyes are wide with surprise, explanations about to spill forth. 

But Miranda simply greeted you with a “hello, dear”, an unamused look, and directed you to a different drawer, filled with units closer to expiring. You can dip into those. Hands off the fresher stuff. 

As a woman of science, Miranda is mildly fascinated by your ability. She’s going to ask you loads of questions. 

Would you allow her to run a few tests on you? 

Bela Dimitrescu

As expected, Bela is delighted to hear about your love of blood.

She asks a decent amount of questions about your power. She thinks it's interesting, and she wants to fully understand!

Unlike her sisters, Bela doesn't encourage you to cause loads of trouble with your power.

...For the most part, that is. Hunts can be so much more fun when you're added to the mix!

Alcina Dimitrescu

Ah, another woman with a palate similar to Alcina’s.

It never stops catching her slightly off guard when you steal a sip of her wine, and she turns back around to find someone else in the spot you were once occupying.

Your power never fools her, though. She always knows when it’s you.

Donna Beneviento

When you tell Donna, she seems entirely unfazed by the information. 

(A part of her is jealous of your ability to change your appearance, to be honest).

She thanks you for trusting her with the knowledge, asks a few questions, and that’s mostly it. 

No, wait. Donna asks one thing of you. If you’re going to approach her while wearing someone else’s face, please tell her that it’s you. She doesn’t want to assume and end up being wrong. That'd be mortifying!

Angie is endlessly entertained and interested in your shapeshifting antics.

Elena Lupu

You don’t tell Elena until after the two of you have been dating for a while.

You were planning on telling her sooner, but when you saw how she got when the Lords came up in discussion? Specifically Lady Dimitrescu and her daughters? ...You couldn’t do it. You didn’t want to scare her off.

Elena won't lie, it does freak her out a little bit at first. The blood-drinking part, that is.

The whole thing takes her some getting used to.

One day, she cuts herself while cooking and decides to let you try her blood.

Seeing herself standing in front of her is certainly a bizarre experience for Elena. Especially when the second her stands like you, talks like you, and looks at her the way you do. She isn’t sure how to feel.

Karl Heisenberg

When he first met you, Karl thought he was gonna have to essentially deal with another Dimitrescu.

But he ends up finding himself fond of you. Very, very fond.

Although you aren’t a vampire, Karl does manage to find plenty of vampire-esque nicknames for you. 

He builds you a lil’ something to make the whole blood extracting/drinking process quicker. 

#x reader #resident evil x reader #daniela dimitrescu x reader #cassandra dimitrescu x reader #bela dimitrescu x reader #alcina dimitrescu x reader #donna beneviento x reader #mother miranda x reader #elena lupu x reader #karl heisenberg x reader #fem reader #daniela dimitrescu #cassandra dimitrescu #bela dimitrescu #alcina dimitrescu #donna beneviento #mother miranda #karl heisenberg #elena lupu

[the-everqueen]

Wondering your thoughts on something I’ve noticed a lot in the Sandman fandom - namely, that every fanart or fanfic involving Daniel (based on the show!!) always portrays/describes him as white, despite the fact that show!Danny’s dad is a black man…

i think there's a few factors at work. first (and foremost) people trying to incorporate bits of the comix in the absence of "official" casting (almost every fanart and a lot of fanfics defaulted to Destruction as a white, red-haired man before the actor was announced). Danny in the comix is a blonde baby and then a sort of...ghostly amalgam of a young man who never existed and Morpheus as we knew him (disheveled hair, gaunt figure, sharp cheekbones, dark eyes). what would that look like in the show? i don't know! i'm hoping there's at least a nod to Daniel's human parentage (he's blonde in the comix BECAUSE he's Lyta Hall's son, and in the comix she's blonde), but i think there are a few ways that it could be cast. Danny!Dream as mixed, light-skinned, and/or racially ambiguous could be both really tragic and really compelling: the erasure of where he came from as metaphor for his personal losses (of family, of childhood, of "personhood" in a human sense), and the insistence on some reminder of his parents, his past, as a counter to his "function." i'd love to see that explored in fic! (as someone who also defaults to comix!Daniel - though there IS a reasoning behind this choice in the LA guard dog universe and non-Dreaming aus.)

at the same time, i think it's partially a function of fans getting attached to Tom Sturridge's portrayal of Dream. when s1 came out, i saw some discourse circulating about how already people weren't ready to "lose" him (and i think some of this filtered into the whole "retired" Dream headcanons, though that's another discussion). and i get that if someone else is cast as Danny, there's going to be a...reaction to both the actor figured as a "replacement" for Tom and the character as a "replacement" for the Dream that fans became attached to. which then becomes a possible burden on the actor. Rose's actor, Vanesu Samunyai, got significant backlash for being a Black woman to play a character who was white and blonde in the comix, and i could see that kind of racism seeping into people's reactions to Daniel. (also a fan grief/sadness at the tragic ending used as a "justification" for racism.) it's not clear to me how much support nonwhite actors like Vanesu get when they're cast in these roles where fans might "expect" a white actor. (like...Riordan told Leah Jeffries in the new PJO series not to listen to the haters because he chose her, which is great and all, but...is production working to ensure that she has someone she can safely process her experiences with, is she given reasonable accommodations, is someone else moderating her socials so she doesn't have to deal with trolls?) so that's another consideration.

(obviously the "solution" isn't to never cast nonwhite actors, but there's been an increase in "diverse representation" in media without a discussion of how these predominantly white spaces have material impact on nonwhite creatives.)

last thing is just that i've noticed the sandman fandom generally seems...more reluctant to engage in alt. casting than say, musical theater fandoms, where there's an expectation that the principal actor won't always be in a role or present when you witness the performance. there's this automatic turn toward finding someone who fits, for example, Delirium from the comix in the absence of an official show casting, rather than playing around with the uncertainty. (personally i'm out here championing Bailey Bass as my Delirium face cast, and tbh if they cast the rest of the Endless sibs as white, she and Stephanie Hsu will remain my primary Del references.) which i think is common in fandoms that rely on a visual "text" for reference, and even more so for Neilman tv fandoms, where fans seem to want/expect "word of god" affirmation. again, another discussion, but i'll just say for now i think the fandom suffers for it.

#sandman #sandman netflix #part of me DOES think it would be funny to just slap a white wig on Tom Porridge for TKO and just end it there #as a sort of...refusal to engage #it'd also be extremely lazy and i think unfair to Danny as a character and who he's been set up to be #but also...let's see if the show makes it that far #i'm already tentative given how much the neilman seems willing to bend to fans in adaptations #and given how gomens has gone...i don't feel 100% confident he'll commit to the story he's already told #ask box

[riftclaw]

I guess this is kind of a propaganda post for @sonic-oc-showdown as well as a way to introduce V to my friends in the moderneo discord! I’ve made them look at him but haven’t talked much about him before.

V is nb/genderfluid; sometimes he’s a man and sometimes he’s a woman. He doesn’t accept she/her pronouns from anyone who isn’t a close friend, though, bc he’s spent enough time in the military to get mad at people using feminine pronouns as an insult.

The number of times he’s punched someone for using feminine pronouns as an insult is extremely high.

He’s also polyam and has a fairly stable family unit w Caprice, Curie, Valke and Luka, with a couple sattelite relationships that matter just as much to him.

The wolf here is Curie, and V broke into a government lab and stole him away bc they were mistreating him.

He’s the power member of a heroes team with Curie being flight and @sege-h‘s Storm as speed.

His hidden disability is a condition similar to MS, with gradual nervous system degeneration focused mostly on his legs and tail. He’s still young enough that he can avoid the cane/crutches most of the time, and he doesn’t like showing “weakness” very much so he only relies on them when he absolutely has to.

He got so annoyed at not being able to use hammerspace powers like every other mobian in Amalgam that he hacked his own genetic code in order to give them to himself. Before that he just carried a bunch of rings in his pockets to throw at people if they smacked him.

He and Caprice got married for legal purposes (so Caprice would be able to handle his finances and the like if something happened to him) but it took him like 2 years to realise Caprice also really loved him. Being aroallo is hard sometimes.

GUN thinks they gave V his shapeshifting powers and V lets them believe that. It means they don’t ask too much about his ability to pop in and out of reality.

The military really would lock him in a box if he wasn’t so good at escaping. They still haven’t figured out how he does it.

His blunted/flat affect and dry sense of humour mean that it’s very hard to tell when he’s just messing with you. He takes full advantage of this.

He pioneered a technique to stabilise dangerous mutations in mobians, which he used to save DJ the Polecat’s life when he started turning intangible and sliding through objects. He brings DJ new comic books every time he goes to the facility DJ lives in.

V introduced himself to Apple the Badger by piledriving her transphobic father into his car and walking her home.

He lets his girlfriend Neura poison him for fun.

He won’t obey orders from anyone he doesn’t respect, and said respect has to be earned. He’s told several powerful people to take a long walk off a short pier bc he didn’t like what they wanted him to do.

I FORGOT THE POLL LINK

#riftclaw art #sonic oc #sonic fc #mobian oc #agent vx #curie the radiant #reblogs #guest art

[a-smol-cosplayer]

Anyways here are some more of my wednesday opinions cause I need them out of my brain (spoilers obvi)

First? Why is everyone hating on the show?? Between the ‘both men where so bland I couldn’t tell them apart fuck love triangles’ and ‘this isn’t an Adams reboot this sucks they made this show horrible and so out of character’ y’all need to take some breaths. 

I found it super compelling and enjoyable!! I loved seeing wednesday grow from someone how hated people and emotions to someone who still hates emotions but has them and has a good relationship with both her new friends and family!

To address the comments above:

Okay maybe Xavier is slightly bland - angsty art kid however his use in the plot and the fact that we are seeing him from Wednesdays pov who obviously doesn’t like him that much and is only using him for her own gain really saves him for me and leaves him open for more development. Talking about the love triangle - I struggle to see one. Its mostly Tyler x wednesday and xaviers crush is one sided, there is no point in the show where she laments over which boy she wants or the fact that she likes both of them - I think we have mixed up what an actual cliche love triangle is in media and ‘these two attractive boys are both in love with the main character’. There might have been more rivalry between them but wednesday certainly wasn’t aware of it

Tyler deserves his own dot point to address the comment above cause HOW CAN U SAY THAT MAN IS BLAND. especially after the last episode. It switches the view on his whole supposedly ‘bland’ point of view and forces u to think about wether thats the real thing and the person in the last ep was an amalgamation of manipulation and grooming as well as deep seeded trauma or if he was playing us the whole time with this awkward clueless personality as he manipulated everyone around him which is such a cool way of looking at it. If u don’t believe me go rewatch the series as if Tyler is aware of everything and is willingly manipulating everyone - cures the ‘he’s boring to watch’ thing instantly. 

Okay getting to the second point - I completely see where u are coming from but like its called WEDNESDAY. Its about this version of wednesday not the whole family, they don’t even appear in it very much. when I seperated it from the previous versions of the Adams family it was super good (however I do get where y’all are coming from about the whole ‘crazy morbid loving family’ dynamic being destroyed but I liked the journey that wednesday and mortica went on and I think it added to her character so I am willingly ignoring it 

Okay now for the part where I rant about Tyler Gilpin cause I love that man with my whole heart and I am a Tyler apologist first and a human being second

MANS WAS MANIPULATED and has some super bad trauma. From the point where his mum died and his dad practically abandoned him and thennn the first person he thought he could trust to look after him and tell him the truth proceeded to turn around and groom and manipulate and USE HIM for her own gain and chained up a literal child whilst forcing him to change into a monster :/ people keep forgetting that he is literally at most 17/18 but probably 16/17 and has been left by every single adult in his child life. Cut my man some slack. 

second: he really did want to leave!! He had no control over his actions as the hyde - he literally says in the first episode how ‘at least one of them would be able to get out of this hellhole town.’ He was a manipulated child!! Sure he might have been slightly dark in his own right but he wasn’t going around murdering people for funzies and he probably only started to enjoy it as a trauma response :/ like what else was he supposed to do?? Go insane cause there was this woman who was forcing him to kill people. He couldn’t control himself as the hyde (u know in the last ep where he said ‘I wake up covered in blood and have no memory of what happened’ ect ect) so everyone saying he’s a murderer who doesn’t deserve wednesday (also wouldn’t a pscyo murderer be like the perfect fir for wednesday?  that scene where he admits to hurting Xavier and then trying to get better and wednesday saying she would have done something worse for the fun of it?? Bruh they are so perfect together and have so much chemistry but ill put that in another rant) anyways. Y’all are acting like he just went around murdering people for the fun of it completely aware are endorsing his actions (did we even watch the same show?) when the main point of Wednesday figuring out the master was a hyde was that there was actually another person controlling the monster in the woods and it wasn’t acting alone 

Also - I see lots of people being like “yeah but he basically assaulted Xavier y’all are ignoring it he’s a bad person 🙄💅” but like?? So was Lucas? 1 he was in the ‘friends’ who distroyed Xaviers painting as well, and he bullied Eugene and tried to fight/hurt wednesday just for being an outcast and used enid to get into the dance and ruined it for everyone and u don’t see people bashing him? People can change and realise that the stuff they used to do as a tween was bad and full of bias inherited from their parents/society :/ 

Anyways to sum up that rant - I love my slightly murderous and traumatised but yet awkward and soft hearted barista with my whole life and if he doesn’t get a redemption arch enemies to lovers, joining the gang (enid, Ajax, wednesday, Bianca, Xavier, Eugene and thing obvi), learning how to control the monster inside storyline next season I’m going to riot. 

Also antihero is totally Tylers song and I love it 

Imma be honest I didn’t dislike any of the characters - I think they are either already well fleshed out and interesting or have the potential to be and I loved the way the three seperate plot lines managed to organically weave and thread together into one whole point just viewed from different angles a lot. I absolutely love enid with my whole heart (I’m not stepping on wenclair at all I love the idea but I just really like the sunshinexgrumpy bestie vibes they have going on and I love Ajax to much to cut him out he’s so supportive and lovely) and she was such a good character with her own plot lines and the way she and thing interacted has my whole heart. Also the way that she got more understanding and wednesday got better at social cues and how to be friends/show emotions was really well done. 

Also low key if u apply my fav way to solve this said ‘love triangle’ which is they all just date each other meaning we get both tylorpe anddd these boys who love wednesday with their entire beings and supportive ajax and enid 👀👀👀👀 (yes Wednesday needs too grovel a little with Xavier she did not treat him well at all and Xavier maybe should get more interests than brooding and painting but we can work on it) ((I also approve of the fact that wednesday has two hands one for each Tyler and enid and ajax can share))

Im also seeing a lot of Tyler/Xavier hate but like,, can y’all not see wednesday isn’t the perfect character either? Like she’s a super morally reprehensible character and treats people hella bad some times. she literally put the only two people who she had managed to get attached too/have a connection too (Tyler and enid ((excluding Eugene love him too))) in danger for her own gain. I know thats the whole point of the show and I love her in that regard, it makes her character really interesting but like— she’s not absolutely perfect and these ‘mean bland boys don’t deserve her’ comments really aren’t helping her character development 

Okay thats it :) 

PLS BE NICE TO ME!! EVERY SINGLE POST IS SEE HAS PEOPLE UNDERNEATH IT GOING (ur opinions are wrong and ur a terrible person for shipping/not shipping this thing) (bc wenclair/wednesdayxxavier didn’t get together it was such a terrible show) (love triangles suck and if u like them u are a woman hating nazi) LIKE CAN YALL CALM DOWN ITS LITERALLY A SHOW CHILL OUT 

#wednesday #wednesday addams #tyler galpin #enid sinclair #xavier thorpe #thing #ajax petropolus #Eugene (I dont know his last name) #bee boy #there we go #bianca belair #wednesday x tyler #love them #I mean u can disagree with me but u won't change my mind #I don't care if the actors and general fandom don't ship them I do #thing said yes so as do I #wednesday netflix #okay I think that is it #if u want more Wyler content feel free to scroll down my blog I think I have rebloggedalmost every post about them I could find #speaking of which #Wyler #Tyler gallon defence

[jpriest85-blog]

I fell in love with @pdrrook Perfumare VN and IFs. While I'm still looking forward to seeing the rest of the story in Perfumare: Amalgam. I also got excited learning about the sequel Perfumare: Amalgam and came up with some concept art and info for my Shapeshifter MC, Gloria Jardin. I'm kind of jumping the gun ik, but I couldn't help it! I'm not sure how things will play out for Gloria, so I'll probably wind up having multiple routes saved like I did for my Allure MC, Liz Morren. Here's my info for Gloria so far. I'll probably wind up changing things once the sequel is officially released.

Name: Gloria Jardin

Animal form: Swan

Pronouns: she/her

Preferences: Bisexual

Birthday: January 24th

Height: 5ft10”/177.8cms

Appearance: A tall ethnically mixed woman, in her late twenties with a chestnut complexion and a dancer's build. A square shaped face with a cleft chin, full mouth and brown almond shaped eyes, her natural hair is black and coily, but as a Shapeshifter she can change her hair and eye color whenever it suits her mood. As does her fashion sense, and she's collected a pretty eclectic wardrobe over the years, depending on her mood and the occasion. From sleek suites paired with colorful avant-garde accessories to more theatrical clubbing outfits that could rival a Las Vegas show girls costume. Although she usually wears some sort of accessory or stylistic touch that has feathers or resembles swans.

Notable Features: A little gap in her front teeth, and long toned legs.

Personality: Gloria comes across as a classy, confident, intelligent and vibrant woman. Although it would surprise people to learn she went through an “ugly duckling” phase as a child. Considering the expectations put on her by her family growing up, she always felt like she never quite fit. In a way her childhood was similar to Laurent's trying so hard to be the “dutiful child ” to meet expectations and approval, and yet she was miserable. Although being away from her family ment Gloria finally got a chance to do things for herself and learn who she was as a person. Discovering she was Tier 4 Shape Shifter was kind of a relief actually. Well mostly she's still under watch from the government considering higher tier Shapeshifter's can potentially impersonate important people like government officials ect.

Although despite the fact that her gift is often associated with subterfuge and misdirection, Gloria herself tends to be a pretty honest person. She's wasted so much of her childhood trying to be what others wanted her to be, and it made her miserable. She's done with that bs, and she's not going to apologize for existing anymore! Although she does have enough class to recognize and apologize if she hurts someone. Even unintentionally by saying something thoughtless or blunt. Also, she still keeps enough social etiquette to show restraint when necessary. Although this does make her appreciate the fact she can take an animal from more. For Gloria, being able to turn into a Swan is cathartic, as she's not bound by the same rules as polite society if even for a little bit. She can fly, swim, and even bite people who piss her off.

Many people are often surprised to learn that she's friends with Alois Becker aka Marco and considers him like family. While Gloria did have a party girl phase and often went out dancing with Marco, she usually tries to keep him from doing anything too reckless that could get him seriously hurt. Although Gloria is fully capable of causing her share of havoc, she just prefers to be more discreet by Shape shifting into her swan form. While swans are very elegant and graceful birds, they have a huge wingspan and have been known to bite, so she can still do some serious damage if so inclined.

Thankfully, she's usually not as aggressive and reckless as Marco, although she sometimes feels more like an older sister/ young stepmother just trying to keep him from accidently getting himself killed. Although Marco will sometimes complain about Gloria becoming less “fun” as they've gotten older he appreciates the fact she cares enough to try, and the fact she's the only person who's always honest with him. Even though it means he usually gets roasted for being an idiot.

Headcanons & Additional info

Her name is a reference to a brand of perfumes, specifically Gloria Vanderbilt's Jardin à New York, which has a Swan debossed on the bottle. 

When it comes to her personal scent preferences, Gloria likes to use classic floral perfumes, particularly ones that smell like Gardenia.

Her Swan form is based on Mute Swans. Although she has been known to also take the form of Cygnet, since baby swans are so cute and fluffy. Perfect for when she wants others to lower their guard or needs to squeeze into smaller spaces. 

Gloria has always been fond of dancing and even took ballet lessons for many years. It's actually how she first met and befriended Alois/Marco. They were enrolled in the same dance class and performed well together when partners. Even during Gloria's party girl phase, she often helped choreographed dance routines for the clubs that made them both the life of the party. 

This also unfortunately fed into some of those “gold digger” rumors about her. Alois/Marco always likes to make an entrance, and what better way to ensure an audience than to show up with a tall, gorgeous woman who could pass for a model. Even though he only sees Gloria as a friend and sister figure, he's more than happy to play wingman, and likewise, Gloria is sociable enough to introduce him to actual super models. He can also act as protection in case drunken creeps try to hit on Gloria and don't take rejection well, which is sadly often. Alois/Marco's efforts to keep Gloria safe wind up unintentionally damaging her social reputation. Since many of these creeps also come from well-off families and don't get the fact that Gloria prefers Alois/Marco's company because he's her friend and respects her personal boundaries. They just assume she's only with him because he's got more money and/or his family owns the club.

Since Shapeshifters often have to thoroughly study an animal before they can take its shape, Gloria winds up developing an interest in swans and other birds. She has become a bit of an amateur Ornithologist and can even accurately mimic bird calls.

Gloria also has a love of learning and academics and in addition to being taught French by her family, she's become fluent in speaking, reading and writing many classical languages as well; Arabic, Chinese, Greek, Latin and Sanskrit.

She probably winds up getting a job in an academic field, which can be exciting for Gloria because she gets to learn so many new and fascinating things and earn new doctorates. It also means she struggles to be taken seriously since she's a lot younger than others in her field, not to mention it's difficult to get resources for research unless she's studying a subject that already has government funding, or wealthy patrons deem profitable. Not to mention her reputation for honesty means she often butts heads with higher ups on things like censorship and propaganda. 

#Perfumare Amalgam #pfm #sequel MC #Shapeshifter: Gloria Jardin #mc concept art #she's just so pretty 😭 #Gloria comes across as more mature than Marco #and for the most part she is #but she still can cause mayhem as a Swan #swans are very pretty and have a lot of romantic folklore and symbols #but they're also large and will cause problems if they don't like u #it's funny to imagine Swan Gloria chasing SPD agents #like in the goose game #she's going to cause so many problems for the different LIs on their various saves #like no wonder Alan is such a mess #he fumbled a relationship with an intelligent and gorgeous woman who loves ballet! #Alan is already an old man emotionally #he'd definitely sit on a park bench feeding the birds and watching the swans because he missed his ex #nino having to deal with the fact she develops feelings for an enemy #but also the fact Gloria is so tall #and as a Swan she's the same height as Nino #Flavo also has some fun potential #not only because it's funny to imagine him being chased by an angry swan #but because the relationship could potentially parallel Swan Lake #Flavo hunting and keeping tabs on a Shapeshifter because of his job #only to realize the Swan he's keeping tabs on turns into a beautiful woman that resents being shackled #hopefully none of Gloria's romances end as tragically as Odettes

[stem-sister-scuffle]

STEM SISTER SCUFFLE: ROUND 1 MASHUP 13

Alphys (Undertale) vs Maru (Stardew Valley)

Alphys is a Roboticist, Biologist and Souls/Determination Researcher!

Maru is a Roboticist, Medic (Nurse), Biologist and has an interest in Astronomy!

Why you should vote for each contestant:

Alphys:

"Because she messed with DETERMINATION and made Amalgamates, blending monsters into each other to form horrible combinations of undead beings. She’s a lesbian"

"Man made horrors, overwhelming guilt, cute lizard girl, bisexual"

"SHE'S SO CUTE. She's awkward and shy but you can tell she knows a lot about what she does!! She's also a bit of a tragic character considering her biological endeavors have gone kinda. wrong. SHE'S BI AND LIKE ANIME 🫶"

"Ultra qualified women with deep scientific knowledge who are also massive anime nerds and can't hold a simple conversation represent!"

"idk she's kind of just. The Royal Scientist . built a robot and put a soul in it. tried to bring monsters back to life, this failed miserably. did research on souls and determination. has a kickass lab. also nerdy as hell and can't just. tell the truth to save her life. love her"

"I don't think we have a word for "works with SOULs and DETERMINATION, including fusing ghosts with robot bodies and creating immortal abominations of multiple people stuck together." I guess you could probably just put her down as Robotics. Mechatronics or something. Like sure she melted a bunch of guys, but she takes responsibility! Feeds em dog food! That takes responsibility. Bisexual"

"She had a friend who was a ghost, and they wanted to be famous! So she used her knowledge of robotics to build them a new body how they wanted! He became famous, as he wished! And Alphys worked on a bigger, better body that fit him well, though it used up a lot of power and needed more upgrades, hence why it wasn’t used often until the final battle with him (Him being Mettaton). But basically, Mettaton got a new body the way he liked it, changed his name, and started going by different pronouns (Mettaton is only ever referred to by they/them when people reference the ghost). Alphys allowed him to feel much happier as himself, and they’re great friends! Though, she did pretend that she created Mettaton and his SOUL herself, no ghostliness involved. But Mettaton did agree to that.

Because of her perceived achievement, (though her actual achievement was also pretty cool) Alphys was hired as the Royal Scientist for the Underground, and got to work with Asgore, the king of all monsters! She continued working with Mettaton, and Asgore asked her to try and find a way to break the barrier that was trapping them Underground without killing humans. Alphys found an interesting thing called Determination, or DT within humans using the SOULs of humans Asgore had killed and allowed her access to.

She tested it on some flowers in his garden to see what would happen, and nothing did. That she realized at the time, anyway. She had actually injected DT into a flower sprinkled with the remains of Asriel, the king’s dead son, and brought him back to life as a flower. Problem was, Asriel, or Flowey as he eventually called himself, didn’t have a SOUL anymore, since he was a flower. Thinking that nothing had happened, Alphys decided to try and see if it could really bring back monsters that had fallen down/were on the verge of death. She asked people for their family members that had fallen down. The monsters that had fallen down were basically dead, but the last of their magic hadn’t quite run out yet. However, their magic was being spent keeping their bodies from turning to dust, and they were unable to move, pretty much in a coma. So really, if it didn’t work, no harm done! Either it works and they live, it kills them, or it doesn’t do anything and they still die!

Alphys conducted her tests, and at first, it worked! All of the monsters were getting up and moving around! She contacted the families to send them back, but when she was about to, she discovered they had all started melting and had stuck together and merged into one being. She chickened out for fear of how the families would react, and proceeded to ignore a bunch of letters for quite a while. Eventually, she did own up to it, though she was immediately fired (by the EX-queen, not Asgore. Was that even legal?). The families were just happy to have their loved ones back, and while they were still somewhat upset, understandably so, they didn’t really blame her all too much.

ALSO!! She got a girlfriend!! She’s canonically expressed interest in Undyne, Captain of the Royal Guard and who would eventually be her girlfriend, Asgore, and the unknowable! She has made mistakes. Big ones. But honestly, I don’t blame her for the mistakes. The real problem was that she is incredibly anxious and let that get the better of her, leading to her not telling people important things that they deserved to know. She’s not the best at being honest."

Maru:

"She is interested in robotics and even builds a giant robot in one of her special events if the player is close enough friends with her. Her father was the one who introduced her to STEM in general, as he is researching the environment in game and I believe it's stated or implied that she often helps him with his research (I'm pretty sure, at least, but it has been a while since I've played and this event is at the very beginning of the game)"

"She's this teenager who is just brilliant despite, you know, living god knows where in a tiny town. She built an actual robot and then it immediately gained sentience so she just set it free. So she's like a scientist with morals!!! Also she can be a love interest in the game. So you can romance this scientist girl, and some of her fav gifts are battery packs and gold bars which she uses for building robots <3"

"She lives with her mom and dad and loves science, she made an entire robot to help her parents because she was worried about them not having help when she's not around. She let the robot go because the robot didn't want to to serve it's "purpose." She loves cheesy cauliflower, literally the perfect woman"

"You can have a lesbian wedding with her! UwU"

"She’s interested in lots of general sciences, but she does plant biology with her father, nursing as a job (so medical sciences), and for fun she likes astronomy and robotics! Her whole personality is literally built around being an STEM girlboss! Her father is a scientist and her mother is a carpenter and and her brother is a programmer…. Autistic nerd family frfr"

"She literally builds a sentient robot who comes to life and leaves to explore the stars. Very skilled in her chosen field!!! AND she acts as a nurse TOO? Very busy, very smart. If you marry her, she suggests you automate your farm. It's always funny because I already have."

"She helps her dad with his biological research into the valley's native flora and fauna. When she's not doing that, she loves inventing things and tinkering around. Her favored gifts are almost all things that can be used in her inventions. At the end of her route she builds A SENTIENT ROBOT. She also works as a nurse part-time."

""Maru acquired a passion for creating gadgets at a young age. When she isn’t in her room, fiddling with tools and machinery, she sometimes does odd jobs at the local clinic." super cool and very pretty"

"Robotics, but she also works in healthcare and dabbles in astronomy :) Literally built an AI beneath her childhood bedroom. I married her one playthrough but tbh she belongs w Penny."

"she is a nurse and the biracial queen we love to see. i married her in all my stardew valley worlds"

#stem sister scuffle #round 1 #alphys #ut alphys #undertale #utdr #sdv maru #stardew valley #sdv #stardew valley maru

[and-then-there-were-n0ne]

Hunger makes me

To desire effort from a man, we are taught, is to transgress in several ways. (This is true even if you’ve never had or wanted a romantic relationship with a man.) First, it means acknowledging that there are things you want beyond what he’s already provided — a blow to his self-concept. This is called “expecting him to read your mind,” and we’re often scolded for it; better, we learn, to pretend that whatever he’s willing to give us is what we were after anyway.

Second, and greater, it means acknowledging that there are things you want. For a woman who has learned to make herself physically and emotionally small, to live literally and figuratively on scraps, admitting that you have an appetite is a source of cavernous fear. Women are often on a diet of the body, but we are always on a diet of the heart.

The low-maintenance woman, the ideal woman, has no appetite. This is not to say that she refuses food, sex, romance, emotional effort; to refuse is petulant, which is ironically more demanding. The woman without appetite politely finishes what’s on her plate, and declines seconds. She is satisfied and satisfiable.

The secret to satiation, to satisfaction, was not to meet or even acknowledge your needs, but to curtail them. We learn the same lesson about our emotional hunger: Want less, and you will always have enough.

A man’s appetite can be hearty, but a woman with an appetite is always voracious: her hunger always overreaches, because it is not supposed to exist. If she wants food, she is a glutton. If she wants sex, she is a slut. If she wants emotional care-taking, she is a high-maintenance bitch or, worse, an “attention whore”: an amalgam of sex-hunger and care-hunger, greedy not only to be fucked and paid but, most unforgivably of all, to be noticed. […]

The attention whore is every low-maintenance woman’s dark mirror: the void of hunger we fear is hiding beneath our calculated restraint. It doesn’t take much to be considered an attention whore; any manifestation of that deeply natural need to be noticed and attended to is enough. You don’t have to be secretly needy to worry. You just have to be secretly human. […]

When I said “I don’t like romance,” it was the equivalent of a dieter insisting she just doesn’t want dessert. I did want it—I just thought I wasn’t allowed.

People frequently claim that eating disorders, like anything common to adolescent girls, are just “a cry for attention.” As someone who was once an adolescent girl, I suspect they are at least partially the opposite: a cry against hunger and need, an attempt to kick away that profoundly human desire to be paid mind. To shut the door on the void.

Fearing hunger, fearing the loss of control that tips hunger into voraciousness, means fearing asking for anything: nourishment, attention, kindness, consideration, respect. Love, of course, and the manifestations of love. It means being so unwilling to seem “high-maintenance” that we pretend we do not need to be maintained. And eventually, it means losing the ability to recognize what it takes to maintain a self, a heart, a life. […]

Women talk ourselves into needing less, because we’re not supposed to want more—or because we know we won’t get more, and we don’t want to feel unsatisfied. We reduce our needs for food, for space, for respect, for help, for love and affection, for being noticed, according to what we think we’re allowed to have. Sometimes we tell ourselves that we can live without it, even that we don’t want it. But it’s not that we don’t want more. It’s that we don’t want to be seen asking for it. And when it comes to romance, women always, always need to ask.

There’s a YouTube video I’m fond of that shows a baby named Madison being given cake for the first time. The maniacal shine in her eyes when she first tastes chocolate icing is transcendent, a combination of “where has this been all my life” and “how dare you keep this from me?” Jaw still dropped in shock, she slowly tips the cake up towards her face and plunges in mouth-first. Periodically, as she comes up for air, she shoots the camera a look that is almost anguished. Can you believe this exists? her face says. Why can’t I get it all in my mouth at once?

This video makes me laugh uproariously, but it’s that throat-full-of-needles laugh that, on a more hormonal day, might be a sob. The raw, unashamed carnality of this baby going to town on a cake is like a glimpse into a better, hungrier world. This may be one of the last times Madison is allowed to express that kind of appetite, that kind of greed. She’s still young enough for it to be cute.

This is Madison’s first birthday. By the time she’s 10, there’s an 80 percent chance she’ll have been on a diet. By high school, she’s likely to have shied away from expressing public opinions; she’ll speak up less in class, bite back objections and frustrations, shrug more, stay silent, look at the ground. She’ll worry about seeming “good”—which means not too pushy, not too demanding, not too loud. (Only bitches want better. Only sluts want more.) Boys will treat her shoddily, and she will find ways to shrink herself into the cracks they leave for her. She will learn to assert less, to demand less, to desire less. She won’t grab for anything with both hands; she won’t tip anything towards her face and plunge in. And that transcendent anguish, that stark gluttony … well, at least we’ll have it caught on video.

What would it take to feel safe being voracious? What would it take to realize that your desires are not monstrous, but human?

Imagine being Madison, grown up but undimmed. Imagine being the woman who is unabashed about needing food to survive and pleasure to be fulfilled and care to be happy. Imagine prying open the Pandora’s box where you hide your voraciousness, and letting it consume indiscriminately, and realizing that the world is not destroyed. Imagine saddling up the seven-headed beast of your hunger and riding it to Babylon.

#hunger makes me #jess zimmerman #appetite #feminism #ed recovery

[i-try-to-write-stuff]

Administrative Alliance - 1

Please do not read this fic if this is not your cup of tea. You have been warned, by clicking on Keep Reading means you have understood the warning. I am not responsible for your content consumption.

18 + DubCon/NonCon

Tony was delighted. He had finally found a perfect match for Steve Rogers, former Captain America. Steve Rogers, the man out of his time, was a really picky guy. Every avenger had given up hope after setting him up with many different women…

After the battle with Thanos, Tony Stark had taken it upon himself to find someone perfect for Steve Rogers because only he could find a way around the legalities of international law…

He outfitted F.R.I.D.A.Y. with everything Steve Rogers could want from a woman. It was not that hard to track his bodily functions around the Avengers Head office or even in the building. All he needed to do that was to find a woman from around the world that had those amalgamated attributes for him to track down and either try to convince her to join Avengers where Tony could put her where Steve Rogers could find himself or to offer up her location to SHIELD to grab her, those Steve Rogers fanatics would do anything to please their lord and saviour.

Name - Y/N Y/L/N

Age – Y/A

Nationality – N

Calculated Compatibility with Steven Grant Rogers- 99.9%

This flashed across Tony’s lab and all the data about you. Anything linked to you was being displayed on the hologram projections.

“FRIDAY, find me anything suspicious on Ms Y/L/N, do a deep dive. I don’t want that SHEILD/ HYDRA situation to happen again.”

“On it, boss, running all background checks.”, the AI replied.

“After you’re done, send an SOS to Steve. I have an inkling that he’ll love this”

“Sure thing, boss”

“Notifying Steve Rogers” F.R.I.D.A.Y.

“Thanks, F.R.I.D.A.Y.”

-----

Steve stomped inside Tony’s lab.

“What the hell, Tony? Why is my room blaring with a priority alert?”

Tony looks up from his latest invention.

“You’ll change your tune when I tell you what I have found for you.” Tony Stark retorted.

“What is it?” Steve observed Tony.

“I found you, someone.”

Steve rolled his eyes.

“Not this again, Tony.”

“Hear me out, Capsicle. I found you a perfect woman, well actually F.R.I.D.A.Y. did. Look through her file; if you don’t like it, we can move on.”

“You found me a dame by science?” Steve commented abrasively

“Just have a look, will you? F.R.I.D.A.Y. pull up the file.”

The hologram displayed all the information about you, along with several pictures of you. F.R.I.D.A.Y. also played videos of yours she captured through facial recognition.

Steve was thunderstruck. You looked perfect, everything he ever wanted in a dame and more. He kept staring at all the pictures that F.R.I.D.A.Y. projected on the hologram.

Tony cleared his throat, which brought Steve out of his reverie.

“So…?”

“Where is she?”

“You don’t need to worry about that. We can get her here in no time.”

“Y/N Y/L/N… it fits her perfectly.”

“What do you want the whole meet cute – dating -marriage package? Or just the marriage?” Tony asked, knowing Steve’s desperation.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I can get her a job here, you can bump into her, ask her out on a date, and if she says yes, you guys go out, and then you propose, but then again, you get married only if she says yes….” Tony elaborated.

“And if you don’t want that… We can get her here. You get married and have a honeymoon for as long as you can…given your stamina, it could be years, all the time you spend if you take choice number one.”

“Why would I do that?” Steve enquired.

“C’mon Capsicle. I have seen the dark look you hide from the world. I have seen you do much worse stuff.”

“How sure are you that she’s the one for me?”

“How about this, if you don’t trust my calculations, you can go there, snoop around, see if she is what you’re looking for….”

Steve thought for a moment. It wouldn’t hurt checking you out. If what Tony said is true, he could finally have a chance at happiness, a family, a bunch of kids, all the things he wanted when he went down in the ice all those years ago, a chance to reclaim what he lost.

Steve observed you for about a month before he decided that you were his soulmate, his better half, everything in the world he’d been looking for…

He called Tony to put a plan in motion when he saw you out and about kissing another man.

You didn’t belong to that excuse of a man. No, you belonged to Steven Grant Rogers, who had saved the world multiple times but was now going to save Y/N Y/L/N from herself…

#Steve Rogers x reader #Steve Rogers x Desi!reader #Steve Rogers x Black!reader #Steve Rogers x WOC!reader #Steve Rogers x Desi reader #Steve Rogers x Black reader #Steve Rogers x WOC reader #Steve Rogers x Y/N #Steve Rogers x You #Dark Steve Rogers x reader #Dark Steve Rogers x Desi!reader #Dark Steve Rogers x Black!reader #Dark Steve Rogers x WOC!reader #Dark Steve Rogers x Desi reader #Dark Steve Rogers x Black reader #Dark Steve Rogers x WOC reader #Dark Steve Rogers x Y/N #Dark Steve Rogers x You #Dark!Steve Rogers x reader #Dark!Steve Rogers x Desi!reader #Dark!Steve Rogers x Black!reader #Dark!Steve Rogers x WOC!reader #Dark!Steve Rogers x Desi reader #Dark!Steve Rogers x Black reader #Dark!Steve Rogers x WOC reader #Dark!Steve Rogers x Y/N #Dark!Steve Rogers x You #steve rogers x woc!reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x female reader

[negative-speedforce]

1, 3, 4, 11, 13, 15, 26, and 30 for Onnie and Laila please?

YESSSS I FREAKING LOVE GETTING ASKS FOR LAILA SHE IS MY BLORBO-

1. Do they sleep with a stuffed animal? If they have multiple, who’s the favorite?

Onnie hasn't had any stuffed animals in years. Eobard made her get rid of them all as soon as she was like, 12, because he thought they were developmentally inappropriate for her age. She had a frog named Tedward (some weird amalgamation of Ted and Edward) and that was her favorite as a kid.

I... don't think Laila is even aware of what a stuffed animal is, considering that she was raised from infancy to be the Empire's weapon. Athena's probably not much help with that one, since she grew up on the streets and having toys falls to the wayside when compared to things like food and shelter.

3. Ask them to describe their love interest.

"Pippa is... an idiot. I can't stand her, she drives me insane, but I can't help but be strangely drawn to her. She's obnoxious, and I really wish she'd back off, but something about her is just so endearing. Maybe it's that she manages to bring back to life the part of me I thought died a long time ago. Or maybe she's just kinda hot."

"Athena's ruthless, reckless, and I never lose the feeling that she's going to backstab me. But she's the only person who's ever given more than two shits about me in my life, so hey, what the heck? Not like I have much else to lose anyway. I'm pretty sure I care a lot more about her than she does about me, but even if this is a short ride, it's a good ride, and I'm not getting off."

4. Do they look good in red?

Onnie looks fantastic in red, so long as the shade's not too orangey. Shades closer to orange (and orange itself) tend to bring out the olive undertones in their skin in a bad way, making them look kinda yellow and sickly.

Laila doesn't look good in most shades of red, except the darker ones, like burgundy and maroon. Bright colors tend to clash with her already near-translucent pale skin, making her look even more pale than she already is.

11. They’ve won the lottery. Spend, or save?

Onnie: Save it all. She's already rich, there's not much else she wants or needs.

Laila: Spend some, save some. Her and Athena aren't exactly poor, but there are some things they'd like that are a little out of budget.

13. Name one thing their parents taught them.

Onnie learned how to be a killer from Eobard. He taught her everything- where the best places to stab someone are, how to rip out someone's heart with your bare hands, how to snap people's necks. Insert Onnie having the sudden "Holy shit I had a bad childhood" realization here.

Laila doesn't have parents. Being a clone, I guess you could technically say that either the parents of her donor are her parents, who she's never met, or the woman who raised her, but anyone calling Nyx a mother would be absolutely insane to say that, since the relationship that Laila (and Pyrrha, later on) had with her was one-sided, conditional, and both emotionally and physically abusive.

15. What would they consider a waste of time– other than school or work?

Onnie considers friendships and other relationships a waste of time. Since they (in very rapid succession) lost their girlfriend, accidentally killed their best friend, and then Jessi faked her own death (which was believed to have been a suicide), Onnie is kinda afraid to open up, but through a lot of mental gymnastics, she thinks it's because she's better than everyone rather than just plain trauma.

Laila considers training non-Force Sensitives in the Jedi arts to be a complete waste of time. Athena's asked her multiple times to try teaching her to do some of the things that Laila can do, like the gymnastics and meditation and stuff, but the most Laila will show her is how to use a lightsaber- weapons are pretty universal, after all.

26. Talent or effort?

Onnie: Talent

Laila: Effort

30. What would they do if they knew it would be forgiven?

Onnie would probably cry. They've been repressing a lot of emotions for a very long time, and any show of weakness could get her in trouble with Eobard, so if she knew it would be excused, I think Onnie would finally let go and feel those emotions.

Laila would tell Athena that she loves her. She'd never say it to Athena's face, especially since Athena kinda scares her and let's be real, she's not even sure if Athena even is capable of caring about a person other than herself. However, if she knew that it wouldn't ruin their relationship completely, Laila would tell Athena how she felt.

#ask revan #oc shit #practically-an-x-man #laila salibun #onnie thawne

[askfallenroyalty]

I just read the surprise/early update and the sound I made followed by "Torielllll....! :(" after I finished... the anguish I felt is indescribable. This poor, poor woman, if only she knew why this feeling of not knowing what is "real" was because of the resets... You captured the feelings of terror, discombobulation, and bewilderment perfectly. A perfect punch in the gut!

oof yeah i feel in hindsight Toriel learning about the timelines was under-explored. ALSO SORRY IM RAMBLY TONIGHT LOL i just feel like talkin at lenght so apologies for all the long posts past midnight aslfkjasdlf. also THANK YOU for all ur kind asks i don't always answer cause when i get nice asks i like looking at them often but that means i don't respond ;o;

Her reaction is to care about how Asriel must of felt using the power (and granted, in the tumblr version she doesn't know/understand the fact that Asriel was Flowey for a long time before being revived as Asriel. Though in the redraw she's going to learn earlier.) anyway she's like, oh, that must been tough on Asriel ): how lonely

but like??? now i realize she'd have permanent deja vu from all the reloads that weren't erased with a true reset. (which, in AFR universe, isn't even a guarantee) she's suffered from this ability, more so than anyone else as she's the only one to truly know all the kids who've come through the Ruins. (Asgore is also the only other guaranteed one, but uh, we already know his... baggage... with the reloads...)

anyway when she finds out, she's going to go "ok? insane but you have scientific evidence let me adjust to this wild new information" to "wait wait were those unstable years when the kids fell REAL? my kids actually DID kill me? HELLO?" and that's going to be. interesting to explore!

i feel like it could even be an EARLY reveal! I feel like Hol specifically is going to want to apologize for what they did. And now that I have opportunity to explore how Asriel is going to explain the age-up is more than just "oh yeah i was a flower for a while" cause. Toriel KNOWS the amalgamate experiments are (vaguely) recent. She fired Dr.Alphys over it. She knows the details now. So Asriel's explanation of being a flower for years in secret makes no damn sense if they've grown to 16 years old when they died at 12.

So yeah, that's going to be something that'll be pushed to a boiling point in the next chapter(s). HOW exactly is she going to handle all this??? like obviously, she's not going to treat this the same if this were adults committing these horrible acts. they're children. Toriel will continue to love them and forgive them because it truly is not the same situation as it would be with, say, Asgore making the calcuatled decision to murder innocent people. like Hol thinking they're some adventurer badass and killing a monster is very much different from that. (and yeah Asgore is more complicated as it relates to war and the barrier and all that bla bla)

Anyway rambling aside i really really look forward to exploring this. cause like, frankly, toriel canonically has all that angsty bs that people put on sans (when he doesn't even remember reloads or gets killed except last minute in no mercy runs 🙄) like toriel had 6 human kids who canonically reloaded around her. give me THAT angst and exploration of that's consequences. I like getting the chance to explore more of Toriel's psychology, baggage and her journey to moving past that. i'm really sad we don't get to see how toriel improved as a mother and person in AFR but rather just that she did. now we get to!!! fuck yeah!

but yeah god what a horrifying, truly awful thing to experience. like on one hand, she must be relieved "oh so there's nothing actually wrong with my reality i don't have a life altering memory related mental illness (yet)" but also "oh so that was all real and i can never truly look at these kids without knowing they've done something truly, truly unforgivable to me. (but i will forgive them)"

AND NOW i'm thinking that toriel had to been told by flowey at some point what they've done to her too. in one of those reloads, flowey likely confessed to get a reaction from her. after the shock of it, she'd pretend it didn't bother her to forgive them. and that'd build up resentment because Flowey doesn't want to be forgiven, they want punishment and consequences and for it to have mattered.

just. AUGH. so many thoughts on this its killing me inside

#schediling this to post tomorrow so its not buried at 1am #ooc #tbd #not art #murder mention #death mention