#i want death or peace but peace is not an option bc that requires too many unobtainable things

[helianskies]

looks at fics

feels a bit sad

continues to study

#tis a cycle #abt my own fics btw nothing else #today the melancholy is mine #anywho i have training tomorrow with another eu interpreter which i am trying to psych myself up for #just feeling blu #mayb not helped by the fact that i had to throw away my dinner bc it just smelt. bad. so bad. #and now idk what to eat instead i did not have a back up plan #also my period is waiting for me in the tall grass i can sense it #so that. probably isnt helping either #god i hate everything right now #i want death or peace but peace is not an option bc that requires too many unobtainable things #helia rants

[fairycosmos]

i hate grief bc i've wanted to die my whole life and thinking about the person i lost never wanted to make me stay but now that they are the ones who died i'm angry as fuck every day and feel trapped but i know that if it had been me the one to die it would have been ok and i wouldnt even have worried about it/hurting ppl with my death. like every day i do H and get drunk and i dont care about dying you know? but i lost someone and it makes me angry that THEY didnt care. do you get what i mean?

i am really really sorry for your loss. yeah. i know what you mean, at least to an extent. everyone’s grief and suffering is unique to them and the relationship they had with the one who passed, but i can relate so much to being trapped and mad and out of my mind. i think a lot of people can. it seems like so many of us are walking around half disillusioned by this existence and half completely done with it because of the shit we’ve been through. every day i feel a form of anger (most of the time it is cold and numbing) when i think about how my sister died. i have gone round and round in my head about why she did the things she did. because even if it wasn’t fully preventable, it wasn’t cancer or a car crash or anything like that. when i found out what she had in her system. god. i can not explain to you what that moment was like. it fucking choked me. all i remember is i felt my heart beating somewhere in my head, and i was PISSED. i thought i was going to pass out. because it’s like you said - she didn’t care, and that was almost like proof. she went to sleep thinking nothing of anything. mindless. after weeks of lecturing her, after her constant presence in my life, all that time. after years of her fucking around w other drugs and finally finding stability only to slip for less than a month bc of some fucking man, only to lose her entire life to a mistake - it’s inexplicable. i can sit here and write to you about it but i still cant’t fathom it. how she didn’t give a fuck, or she couldn’t see the situation clearly enough to. and now i’m living this forever without her. now i have to take care of my mother alone. now i’ve lost my best friend. and she lost everything. she was a whole person, she would’ve had years left and she deserved to. and the only reason she didn’t is because she couldn’t fuckin accept how much she was worth, how much life was worth so she gambled w death. what i’m saying is i understand that in a way, maybe a selfish way, i don’t know -  it almost feels mocking. because we’ll never know if they realize what they’ve done. after she died that’s all i could repeat out loud in the shower. i kept saying: you don’t know what you’ve done. idiot, stupid girl. shit like that. every time i tried to talk to her, it was a lecture. so yeah. it is very very normal to be pissed off and bitter dude. it is not easy or fair to be left behind. it’s all a normal part of grief. losing it entirely is the whole thing because honestly what else can you do.

i could be wrong but. unfortunately i think all of these emotions, in the context of you, stem from the fact that it is easier to care for others than it is to care about yourself. you’re not bothered about yourself dying because you don’t have the same love for yourself that you had for the one who passed. you don’t see yourself as important in that way. i don’t know what happened to make you feel like that. maybe whatever it was lead you to use drugs n alcohol to escape in the first place. maybe you think you not mattering is some sort of universal truth, but it’s not. it’s a belief you constructed either out of pain or as a trauma response that you’ve clung onto so much that you’ve convinced yourself it’s reality. it’s clear you’re going through an insurmountably difficult time, and i know words on a screen aren’t going to change that. i wont pretend to get it first hand. i just want you to know that the same way you wish your friend had realized the worth in their life before it was too late, that same anger born from frustration and sadness - that’s how a lot of people likely feel about you. and i know you don’t care about hurting them w your death because you don’t care about anything. your friend didn’t care, why should you, right? but that’s how the cycle perpetuates. and you’re the one who has to live with this all now, stuck here or not. try to periodically and consciously recognize how fucked up and permanent grief is. you don’t want to be the one to cause it. not really. not when you can see it for what it is and you have the option to prevent it. you are here no matter how much you wish not to be. you do deserve to find substantial peace, stability and good health while you still can. that’s non negotiable. even if it takes a fucking life time getting there.

i completely understand that it is all far easier said than done. that you have to be the one who is willing to reach out for help and to really stick w a plan but. i guess i just hope you know that the option will always be waiting for you when you are willing to seek it out. whether it’s through a hotline, rehab, your doctor, your friends and family, 2 hours without using or drinking. any step in the right direction is commendable. you are absolutely more resilient than you realize. more in general than you realize. you’ve had to deal with so much, just the most unimaginable things, and you’re still here. i know that’s because you feel you have no real choice in the matter, back to being trapped here. but nonetheless you’re making it. you can learn to treat yourself w the same regard that you treated your friend. you can learn to care about what happens to you. you can slowly make a home out of what you currently see as a jail.  through talking, through implementing healthier coping mechanisms into your daily life, through building a support system, through confronting and processing how much it hurts, through finding the clarity that comes with progress. all the things your brain wants you to write off. addiction and mental illness are genuine health concerns that require long lasting therapy and treatment just like any other ailment. and maybe the point is to learn to live with them, rather than to cure them entirely. but they are not a death sentence (and that is a good thing), and they are not the entirety of you. you are just currently very overwhelmed by them, understandably so.  excuse me if this is all sounds like naïve bullshit, but maybe some day you will be able to take some of it on board if you can’t right now. anyway, it sounds cliche as fuck, but every day that you’re alive you’re keeping your friend’s influence on this world alive too. you were shaped by them, in more ways than you realize. and they’re here in more ways than we realize too. not necessarily ghosts, at least imo. but just around. and in your head, in the universe. i am rooting for you so much and i hope you can accept that even if it all feels like lies, it’s ok to treat yourself w kindness. any attempt is good enough. sending a lot of love your way. please take care of yourself as much as possible. please consider your needs and your well being while you still have the choice to. sorry to go all 90s drug prevention ad on you btw, but u know me. i’m incapable of shutting up and minding my business abt this sort of thing lol

#tw drugs #tw addiction #tw death #tw overdose #tw suicide #anon

[queenharumiura]

Hayato looked at the window, he has been in the hospital for a few months now as he wasn't sure who he was, all that they knew was the little they could find on his wallet. Name and from where he was, although the information was all false, but they still used the false name. A few days later he was finally found as he stares at the woman in front of him. "Who are you?" A nurse got in looking confused. "Oh miss? Are you lost? This patient doesn't have a family." - TYL bc I CAN.

[Unprompted ask] One r00d prompt after another. I don’t know if I did this one justice, but I sure did try! I hope I kick you in the feels.

Haru woke up to find herself in a hospital one day. Racking her brain, she could vaguely remember an explosion of some sort? She looked herself over to see bandages wrapped over every which way on her limbs. She couldn’t help but sigh in lament. “Surely he wouldn’t mind a scar or two… right? If he did, I married the wrong man.” She joked to herself, fighting depressing thoughts with something more light-hearted. Her stuff lay right beside her on a table.

Within the few months that Gokudera had gone missing without a word, Haru had done her best to fill in, but it was obvious that she could not do a perfect job. Not to disparage her own intelligence, but Gokudera was also extremely intelligent in his own right. That much she had to begrudgingly admit. Additionally, there were some things that required brute strength, something she did not have.

The most she could do is use her intelligence to quickly go through paperwork and make heads or tails of things. Whatever required brute force, she’d have to trouble someone else to get the job done. It would be a lie to say that Haru wasn’t a mess, overwork was evident in her face from all the all nighters she’d pull.

Gokudera probably thought he could go crazy with how busy he was when he filled in for Tsuna, who had passed away, but what about her? She now had to fill in FOR THE FILL IN! On top of that, she was riddled with worry about how her husband had been missing for months.

Even now the Vongola was struggling to stay afloat, but everyone was pitching in to help, and for that, she was grateful. For some time, Haru started acting as the proxy for the ailing Storm Guardian, stating that he had returned from a dangerous mission and needed time to recover. As his wife, she was speaking for him.

Of course, that was a lie. No one else knew except for a select few that Gokudera was missing in action. It was stressful to say the very least and she worried day and night about where that husband of hers was, but she never voiced a word of complaint to anyone. She had to stay strong and do her best for whenever Gokudera returned.

She would occasionally attend meetings and do her best to live her life as normally as she could, but things were never that easy. As she spearheaded her way to involving herself deeper in the mafia politics, the more dangerous things became for her. The more horrors she had to face. The very things that Gokudera had shielded her eyes from over the years.

She felt guilty for sure, but she also felt upset. Was she that untrustworthy of a wife that he didn’t want to tell her these things? No, she knew that it was likely a vain answer such as, ‘not wanting to make you worry too much.’ How silly. The moment they exchanged their marriage vows, they agreed to accept everything about the other. No matter how dangerous and scary things were, she would have to put up with it and push through.

This is how a Yakuza wife must feel in those movies. She couldn’t stay here for long. Taking her stuff from the side table, she climbed off the bed. With no one around, she went walking down the halls, searching for someone who could discharge her when she came to a sudden stop. There, staring out the window was a familiar figure. “Hayato?” She rushed over to his side, grabbing his face in her hands to get a good look at him. It’s him.

She recognized those eyes everywhere. Every scar she remembered (and a few new ones) were exactly where she remembered them to be. When he asked her who she was, she jumped back in surprise. Was this a joke? She searched his eyes and realized that he wasn’t joking. He couldn’t remember her. How much memory loss did he have? Was it that he forgot about her entirely, or he couldn’t recognize her? Did he forget about the Vongola?

Just how bad was his situation that he, with his incredibly memory, forgot everything? ‘It’s possible that his mind forced him to forget so he could focus on recovery.’ Did that mean he had to forget about her too?

Right, she probably gave him more stress than anything, huh? She felt like deadweight before, but she felt utterly useless now.

Next, a nurse came in to tell her that he didn’t have a family.

What nonsense was that? He had a family! He had a wife, and he had a half-sister, who was still alive, mind you. She was about to say something, but something came to mind. The nameplate aside his bed, the lack of a wedding band.

This man was her husband, but also wasn’t her husband at the same time. He had a new identity here at this hospital. He couldn’t remember her or the vows they exchanged back then. Perhaps, he’d be happier living out this life here unaware of the dangers his previous life offered him?

No, if his memory would ever return, he wouldn’t forgive her for leaving him there. She fiddled with her wedding band on her finger, hiding it from view. Yes, it was better this way if he didn’t remember a thing.

“No… I recognize him, he has a family. He has a half-sister who I can call to come pick him up.” She glanced at the hand that wasn’t wearing his wedding band one last time before she looked away. “He’d gone missing a few months ago and we’ve been looking everywhere like crazy.” She spoke as steadily as she could, but the shake in her voice couldn’t be disguised. Before tears welled up in her eyes, she bit her bottom lip hard enough that she could taste metal. “Please give me a moment, I’ll make the call.”

The woman left the room and made a call, making arrangements to bring him home, and telling for Bianchi to come with a different identity, one that would match the backstory of the identity Gokudera had according to what he carried in his wallet.

…

…

“You didn’t tell him? That you’re married?” Bianchi asked as she handed Haru a cup of coffee that she got from a vending machine. She had finished talking to the doctors about getting Gokudera discharged. They were getting him ready to leave.

“No, I thought it would be better for him not to know. I want him to focus on recovery.” Haru said as she took a sip of the bitter coffee. “Don’t you think you could help him recover by being by his side?” Bianchi questioned, unsure of why Haru was being this passive. Before, Haru would insist on being by his side, nursing him back to health. She would’ve fought tooth and nail to ensure his steady recovery.

It was something that Bianchi always liked about Haru, her earnest nature in caring for those she loved. It was something that she could relate to, after all. Unfortunately, Reborn was gone from this world.

For a time, Haru was the only one who could understand her feelings of the anxiety losing a loved one, but that didn’t comfort her. After all, the one Haru ‘lost’ at the time was her own brother. So Haru’s passive behavior was questionable.

A bitter smile flashes across Haru’s face, her thumbs rubbing against the warmth of the coffee cup. “You know, I’m going to do it. Be a messenger.”

“You-! Absolutely not! Who put such a stupid idea in your head!? You know what happened to the last messenger! They killed him!”

The younger woman didn’t react, taking another sip of her coffee. “They demand to see someone who has some rank within the Vongola. I may not be an able fighter, nor am I heavily involved with politics… but I am the wife of the right hand man. That in itself gives me enough rank to qualify. This is to show our ‘sincerity’ about wanting to proceed with peace talks.”

This was a woman who was determined to do something for the sake of others. She may be somewhat of a coward, but Haru always seemed to have a heart of a lion if it meant she had to protect something. In this case, she had her friends and her family to protect.

Haru had the confidence in being able to hold her own in peace talks, but she’d be thinking too optimistically to assume the Millefiore weren’t simply asking for another sacrifice to make an example of.

Logically speaking, she was the best option. They could fulfill their sick desires and the Vongola, in theory, wouldn’t lose much. She wasn’t a fighter. She historically wasn’t involved in politics. She only involved herself recently due to Gokudera being MIA. Sure, the Vongola would lose some face, but their battle strength won’t weaken with her death.

Who knows? Maybe they’ll become stronger in the name of vengeance. Wouldn’t that be nice if that’s what they needed to win?

“Even so, that doesn’t mean that you-“ “I know my status. My rank is empty. We can lose another guardian or an able fighter. Letting me go would yield the smallest damage. I’m sure if Hayato regained his memories, he’d volunteer himself to go, but… Bianchi… I’ve already lost him once, haven’t it? I can’t lose him again, don’t make me do it.” Haru’s stony countenance shattered as she broke down into tears.

Did she want to die? No. Did she fear death? Yes, but she feared losing Hayato far more than that. She already thought she’d lost him before and she refused to send him off to his death a second time.

Bianchi quietly pat her back, understanding the conviction the woman had to keep her husband safe. She understood the sacrifice that Haru was steeling herself for in order to ensure the Vongola didn’t lose out on too much.

She understood it all logically, but she still didn’t want to admit to it. This girl, was her brother’s wife. That meant she was her dear sister-in-law. Why did things have to turn out this way? It was incredibly vexing and unfair.

“He’d never forgive you.” He would never forgive Bianchi either for letting Haru go as a messenger. She hoped that by saying this, she could shake Haru’s resolve.

The brown-haired woman pulled away from Bianchi, wiping away her fallen tears, steeling her heart once more. “The dead don’t ask for forgiveness. I’ll find a way to convince everyone. If we’re lucky, they won’t touch me, a non-combatant.”

That’s a lie.

“It’s too dangerous to send a guardian there, and they’re needed on other missions.” That’s the truth, and she’d know, because she had a hand at assigning guardians to different tasks. She’d purposefully sent many of them away so they couldn’t stop her and volunteer themselves instead.

As much as she believed in their strength, it was too much to assume anyone could get out alive when in the middle of the Millefiore base with all their forces looking down on you. It was much too risky, and organizing a rescue mission would be even more tricky.

She believed it best to simply use someone as a discardable piece and she nominated herself.

“Don’t tell him about anything. Let him heal at his own pace. Hopefully, he’ll never remember about me, that way, he won’t ever had to lose me.” You can’t lose someone if you can’t remember them.

What a blessing in disguise. “There has to be another way.”

Haru shook her head. If there was a plan that had a good probability of succeeding, Haru would gladly take the option, but there wasn’t. The Millefiore was just too strong and their hands reached far. It wasn’t worth the risk of losing a guardian or two for a plan that had less of a 10% chance of succeeding.

“I won’t hesitate to sacrifice myself to protect everyone for a while longer. I’m sure Tsuna-san and Hayato would’ve done the same. Think of it as me giving back for all the times I was protected.” She was going to make herself truly useful.

“If… he ever regains his memories… tell him I’m sorry for being selfish.” She didn’t want to lose him again. Hopefully her sacrifice would push the Vongola in the direction of victory.

Surely, he could find someone better. Someone who could help him more than she could.

…

…

“Those bastards! Who let her go through with this!?”

“How did she die?”

“The tests show poison. She hid it within her ring. Where did she get her hands on such a thing?” Eyes turned to look at a certain individual who said nothing.

She could only remember something Haru said a couple days ago:

“If they’re serious about a peace treaty, I’ll do fine. If it’s a ruse, I’ll make sure they can’t get any useful information out of me.” She fiddled with her ring that had a mechanism to inject her with lethal poison should the situation go down south.

It was a bit morbid, but adding this feature to her wedding ring was poetic in her mind. Before she could be used, she would save herself with death.

Bianchi looked down at the woman laying in the casket that the Millefiore had so ‘graciously’ sent to them filled with Edelweiss flowers, symbolizing courage and devotion.

“Don’t let her sacrifice go to waste. We have work to do.” 

#Thehandworld #Answered ask #thanks for the ask! #Haru speaks #((Muse; Gokudera)) #((You wanna torment me with amnesia? I'll one up with straight up sacrificing Haru)) #((How is that for an angst train? The last one was tame but how about this?)) #((It still feels a bit tame for me but just imagine he regains his memories and finds out she died. HA)) #((The true angst is in the post events))

[wetalkinboutbooks]

Realm of Ash by Tasha Suri

Summary:  The fate of an empire rests in the hands of a young woman with magical blood and nothing left to lose, and an outcast prince determined to save his family at any cost, in this "dark, melodious, and memorable" new fantasy (Library Journal, starred review) from the author of the award-winning Empire of Sand.

The Ambhan Empire is crumbling. A terrible war of succession hovers on the horizon. The only hope for peace lies in the mysterious realm of ash, where mortals can find what they seek in the echoes of their ancestors' dreams. But to walk there requires a steep price.

Arwa is determined to make the journey. Widowed by a brutal massacre, she's pledged service to the royal family and will see that pledge through to the end. She never expected to be joined by Zahir, the disgraced, illegitimate prince who has turned to forbidden magic in a desperate bid to save those he loves.

Together, they'll walk the bloody path of their shared past. And it will call into question everything they've ever believed...including whether the Empire is worth saving at all. (Taken from Goodreads)

Our Ratings:  

 → Geena:  ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

 → Kae: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ 

Overall: Realm of Ash is a great follow-up to Empire of Sand, where we follow Arwa who was introduced briefly in Empire of Sand. There is quite a bit of political intrigue in the first half which sets the pacing a bit slow but picks up quickly once the characters go through big revelations. The characters and their motivations draw you in, and overall it was a good read!

~Check out our spoiler Full Review Below

A QUICK SUMMARY: 

So, this book picks up twelve years later from where we last visited this world in Empire of Sand. In this book, we are following the story of a once minor character, Mehr’s little sister, Arwa. Arwa has grown and married and been widowed when we meet her again. She is on her way to a widows hermitage where she is to live out the rest of her days in mourning, after losing her husband. 

Since the Maha’s death, this world had descended into chaos. The daiva, aka, eternal spirits, aka CHILDREN OF THE GODS, have been wreaking a bit of havoc on the world. If you remember, the Maha was manipulating the dreams of the Gods to favour the kingdom. When he was defeated, those dreams had begun to take their natural course. With dreams come nightmares. And those nightmares have taken form. BUT. The daiva protect their own blood, which is the Amrithi people. Arwa is half Amrithi, but she isn’t sure if the daiva are there to protect or hurt her. In addition, her mother (aka stepmom) raises her believing that Amrithi are cursed and savages, and essentially taught her to hate herself. 

In the widow’s hermitage, she meets an influential widow, Gulshera, and realizes she has connections to the imperial family and because Arwa doesn’t care about anything she offers herself up as a tool to the royals. So, Gulshera takes Arwa to serve under Princess Jihan, we’re subjected to court politics and meet Prince Zahir, aka a bastard. Together, Arwa and Zahir work together to find the Maha in the Realm of Ash (essentially a spirit world) so they can unlock a way to save the empire from ruin. Princess Jihan turns around and essentially implies that she sent Arwa to Zahir to ‘PLEASE’ him in an INTIMATE fashion. Arwa doesn’t take it and gets mad but Zahir isn’t here for it and it’s smooth sailing again. 

During a trip into the Realm of Ash Arwa realizes the truth behind her Amrithi blood and the Maha’s crimes and shares it with Zahir. They both struggle, Arwa being staunchly anti-empire and Zahir trying to do something to prove his worth to his sister. When the emperor dies, he names Zahir as the Maha’s heir and Jihan’s older brother Prince Akhtar as Emperor. A few murders later, a different Emperor sits on the throne and Zahir has a bounty on his head. Zahir and Arwa use the aid of a secret women’s society Zahir’s mom was a part of to escape to where the Maha was stationed to find the secret to the empire’s success, discovering cursed towns, ghosts from their pasts, and their feelings for one another. 

The Good:

→ Zahir

Kae:  So ZAHIR! I love him. He is as kind as a kitten. As sweet as an apple pie. But because he is a bastard, he is hidden away in tombs that were converted to be his rooms. There, he does research on how to restore peace and order to the Empire. He knows his days are numbered, being the bastard son of the Emperor, so he is essentially doing research to bargain his own life. Besides that, he genuinely likes learning and spent the majority of his days doing that anyway before he was banished to the tombs to live in secret. 

When we first meet Zahir, he is studying by candlelight in his rooms. Arwa finds a bit of power in him not noticing her, and takes the time to watch him for a moment. She thinks he’s handsome with his ‘pretty face’ and sharp, slender form. She’s like “damn he’s kinda hot… but I'm a widow… I’m not allowed to think boys are hot anymore.” But alas, she thinks he handsome. So they assess each other for a moment and agree to be apprentice and teacher.. Zahir gives Arwa poems and books to read that will help her better understand about the Realm of Ash and what he is working on. 

Geena: Arwa wears a veil for 90% of the book because such is the way of the widow, so she makes a point to stare at Zahir through her veil because she knows he can’t see her checking him out. And this boy turns around and hands her poetry, the more we learn about the nocturnal prince the more you realize he’s such a Soft Boi™ who loves literature and wants to desperately prove that his life has worth. His mother was killed because she tried to give the Emperor some advice, and the Empire of Ambha drinks the ‘women aren’t shit’ juice so she was labelled a traitor and murdered. Zahir only survives because Princess Jihan loves him, and as a legitimate spoiled princess she has to be pampered. Zahir has the ability to study and work with magic, because his mother was part of a secret women’s society that did so and it was passed onto him, so he’s been tasked with figuring out a way to stop the Empire’s decline ever since the Maha died. 

His character made me sad a little bit, because he feels like he should have died with his mother to some extent. And Jihan has led him to believe that his life being worth something depends solely on the fact if he can find the Maha’s spirit and save the empire. He’s treated like trash by everyone else because he’s a bastard and into witchcraft, even Arwa thinks he’s a weirdo in the beginning. But he’s such a kind-hearted soul?? Who btw respects women, when Arwa accuses him of tryna sleep with her, Zahir is like “MA’AM, I RESPECT YOU WITH MY WHOLE HEART IDK WHAT SHIT MY SISTERS BEEN DRINKING BUT I WOULD NEVER!” well, he’s less dramatic than that but yea he suggests laying out rules so they don’t cross the apprentice/teacher dynamic. Also, during one trip into the Realm of Ash and Arwa’s veil comes off and she literally snaps at him to not look at her face (bc it is not the widow way) he straight up doesn’t look at her face ever for a good portion of the book after that skfjdf.  

Kae: YEH HE JUST LOOKS AT HER HANDS. SOFTIE. I LOVE HIM. 

Geena: Hand fetish IM JOKING… BUT SNDKFJDNST THAT’S ALL I COULD IMAGINE.. Arwa was like “Man, my veils off but this boy is still looking at my HANDS” 

The Bad:

→ Gulshera and the Royals

Kae: Gulshera! Ohh, she made me mad at the end. But like, I get it, ya know? So Gulshera, our bow-wielding widow, was Princess Jihan’s nursemaid and confidant. So when Gulshera finds out Arwa is Amrithi (because Arwa got caught trying to rid the Hermitage of daiva) she basically goes to Arwa like “You know you gotta get up outta here right? You can’t stay here, shawty.” But she gives Arwa the option of possibly going to the Empire and devoting herself to the Princess and her cause for solving the Empires bad luck. So Arwa goes, meets Zahir, yada yada yada. 

Gulshera asks Arwa very vague questions about what she’s doing but doesn’t exactly want to know what Arwa is doing. She just a lil nosey. So after a while, the Emperor dies and the named prince is killed by his brother. Zahir is next and he and Arwa escape. Eventually, they are found in the desert where Gulshera shoots the shit out of Arwa’s shoulder. It’s such a bad blow that Arwa is pretty much bleeding out. I was like, yo what the FUCK GULSHERA. 

Geena: YEA LIKE SHE PRETENDS TO BE HER ALLY AND CARE FOR HER BUT TURNS AROUND AND IS LIKE “SORRY BABES IMPERIALISM ALWAYS WINS” 

Kae: AND THAT’S THE TEA BAYBEEEEEE. IT was such bullshit. But again, I get it. Gulshera is like “It’s either me or you… And I raised the princess so imma do what she says and also I knew her longer soooo…. Bye Arwa. This will haunt me for the rest of my days… but it be like that.” 

Geena: Kae covered Gulshera really well! But yea she was a stank old lady in the end, like you’re essentially the reason Arwa is where she is but you’re acting like you had nothing to do with anything. BUT N E WAYS, I’m gonna talk about Princess Jihan a lil bit because she annoyed me too. She was privileged and used Arwa like a ragdoll, actually not even just Arwa but her brother she claimed to love too. Jihan really guilt-tripped the FUCK out of Zahir being all “Did I save you from nothing? Do I deal with other’s scrutiny for nothing? Prove your worth to me brother, prove that I’ve placed my love in the right man” and I was like……  bitch…. She might have been a princess but she was the queen of emotional manipulation. Also, she claimed to be for the women but essentially told Arwa that one of her jobs was to fuck Zahir and like…. Hello….. What is wrong with you. 

OH AND ANOTHER THING… when it’s revealed that the Maha used Amrithi people to shape the Empire’s success, and Zahir confronts Jihan about this she’s like “Yea, and?” like she saw no problem in using a group of people and villainizing them in the same breath…  Imperialism is a hell of a drug 

The Ugly:  

→ The Nightmare

Kae: So the Nightmare was truly… A nightmare. 

When we first learn about how Arwa became a widow, we learn about an incident that took place at a military base called Darez Fort. Darez Fort is where Arwa stayed with her husband, Kamran. We learn some soldiers come back with what they think is a Daiva, trapped in a little cage/crate thing. When they open it up, it appears to be a childlike creature. But it soon reveals a face of white bone and attacks everyone in the fort. The Nightmare makes the men turn on each other as well and it’s quite literally a blood bath. Everyone is dead. The maids, the cooks, the soldiers, and Kamran. All killed. BUT THERE IS A DAIVA THERE. It’s Arwa’s litter guardian angel. She knows her blood protects her, so in a panic, she makes this big ass cut on her arm and surrounds herself with her blood. The Daiva protects her from the Nightmare and she is the only survivor of Darez Fort. 

The Nightmare leaves a sense of fear in Arwa that literally makes her shake. She can kind of sense when it’s near. So on her journey with Zahir and a guards woman named Eshara, they end up at another fort for a rest. Some soldiers are ordered by this mean ass general to stay inside the fort because they aren’t allowed to leave. This is when Arwa gets that chilling sense of fear as she did in Darez Fort. SOME EVIL SHIT IS AFOOT. 

Geena: Yesss, the nightmares are like anti-daiva essentially. I really liked their concept and how they factored in with the worldbuilding. What makes them terrifying is that the Maha spent how many centuries fending off nightmares by using Amrithi, but suddenly without him to control how gods dream, nightmares are flooding the empire. Arwa manages to defeat the nightmares by unlocking the memories of her past ancestors from the Realm of Ash and crudely dancing a rite that locks nightmares in cages. Along with Zahir, Arwa figures out that nightmares consider themselves some sort of god and love to be worshipped. Both Zahir and Arwa decide that the empire can rot, and the nightmares can do what they want but they’ll teach anyone with amrithi blood to dance the rite and worship the nightmares to prevent any more massacres like Darez Fort.

→ Maha

Geena: God….. This stankass wrinkly-ass bitchboy really sunk his claws so deep into the Ambhan people that after he died, he was thought to be a martyr. Like 12 years after his death and people still worship him, and mourn his death? Mehr and Amun went through so much to end his reign of terror yet the empire continued to worship him. I’m sure they didn’t have the time or power to go around and spread the truth behind the Maha’s work but good LORD was it grating to read people missing that disgusting man. But thinking back on it, even if Amun and Mehr had exposed him… would people have believed an Amrithi couple that killed their beloved Maha? They probably would’ve killed them instead :(

Though, this was an interesting detail that Tasha Suri included. That, despite the evil being defeated, people will refuse to acknowledge it as evil and continue to point fingers at marginalized people for the problems caused by the evil being. 

The Awesome:

→ Arwa and Mehr

Kae: If y’all could see me now, you would see me doing a little dance because BIIIIITCH. I WAS LIVIIIIING SOLELY FOR MEHR AND ARWA TO MEET UP AGAIN. EVERY PAGE I WAS LIKE “is Arwa gonna talk about Mehr? Does she miss her sister?” AND SHE DID SOMETIMES AND I LOVED IT. AND THEN ARWA SAID SHE WAS TOLD HER SISTER HAD DIED AND I WAS LIKE NOOOOO. SHE IS ALIVE, ARWA. SHE IS ALIIIIVE. 

So when Arwa was in the Realm of Ash, she had seen Mehr and was SHOOK. Because you can only see dead relatives in the Real of Ash. So she actively avoided Mehr in the Realm because it hurt too much to see her there. It just confirmed that her sister was dead. And even I was confused because I was like “Ummm, Tasha… I know you didn’t kill off my girl after she done went through all that shit.” So I started thinking…. Because in the Realm of Ash, you saw the dead as grey ash. Shadows. But she saw Mehr in colour and full of life. So I had this theory that since Mehr has Amata (Amrithi spiritual magic closer to the ancestors) that she was seeing Mehr in the realm because of how close Mehr’s amata was so the ancestors and daiva. 

GUESS WHO WAS RIGHT BITCH? MEEEEEE. I CALLED THAT SHIT. IT’S MY SUPERPOWER. So like, as Arwa is dying from that arrow bitchass GUlshera shot her with, she ventures into the Realm and see’s Mehr again. She calls out to her, and Mehr sees her. She promises to find her. 

When Zahir and Arwa escape from his sister’s claws, the daiva take them out into the desert. Mehr eventually finds them and brings them back to her home. When Arwa wakes up, she is greeted by Mehr bandaging her up. They cry and hug. I CRY BECAUSE I’M SO DAMN HAPPY. I LOVE A GOOD REUNION. MEHR LOVED ARWA SO MUCH AND ARWA LOVED MEHR. AND THEY WERE SEPERATED AND HADN’T EVEN KNOWN THE OTHER WAS STILL ALIVE. AND THERE THEY WERE. TOGETHER. AND ALIVE AND HUGGING AND CRYING. It was beautiful. I was like, ugly crying. So thank you, Tasha. Thank you for writing that scene so well because it was happy and emotional and they both deserved to see each other again. It will go down as one of my top 5 reunion scenes. 

I’d also like to say, unrelated to Mehr-- That Awra and Zahir did admit their love for each other and kissed. And Zahir was Arwa’s, and Arwa was Zahir’s, though they made it clear that they belonged to no one. They belonged to each other. And their love was so soft and built on mutual respect. They were both very lonely and longed for one another, but never pursued because Arwa didn’t want to break the honour code of the “widows way” or whatever, and Zahir didn’t want to disrespect her. BUT THEIR MINDS. THEY LOVED EACH OTHER. So they both finally gave in. And it was lovely. 

Geena: ugghh yess, Arwa and Zahir’s relationship was based on mutual respect and love (just like Mehr and Amun!). In both instances, people forced them together but it was only through their own agency that they fell in love with one another, and support each other wholeheartedly. 

ALSO, THE REUNION KSJNFKSJF I had a suspicion that Mehr was alive too based on everything that Kae mentioned too! So, when Mehr says to Arwa that she’ll come for her I sCREAMED!!!! I loved it so much, them crying in each other’s arms… Arwa seeing Mehr’s own kid… LIKE HELLO??? 

Kae: AND TASH SAID HER AND AMUN COULDN’T HAVE KIDS BECAUSE OF THE RITES SO I WAS SHOOK AND HAPPY AND OMG. literally SCREAMING. 

Geena: YEA I REMEMBER THAT, BUT THEN I ALSO REMEMBERED YOUR THEORY! Where the Maha had said that people that danced the rite couldn’t have children because he tried to impregnate amrithi women he enslaved but it didn’t work… and Kae you’d said it was probably because he was shooting dust and YOU WERE RIGHT!!!

Kae: IT’S MY SUPERPOWER. IM TELLING YOU. I CAN GUESS THE SHIT OUT OF SHIT. 

Geena: KJDSFNKSDJF I LOVE YOUR SUPERPOWER!!! My only complaint was that we didn’t get a longer scene with Mehr/Amun and Arwa/Zahir bonding :( I wanted mooorreee… other than that it was everything! 

Conclusion

Geena: TO CONCLUDE! Tasha Suri didn’t disappoint with this sequel… and it’s so easy to write a shitty sequel but she was like nAH WE’RE NOT ABOUT THAT LIFE. And we loved it! There was a slow start as we read Arwa struggling with her internalized hate, but after she realized that she came from a people who have survived in Ambha in the face of adversity the book sped up real fast. The romance was so soft and wholesome and everything that we want in a relationship, Tasha knows EXACTLY what she’s doing when she’s writing romance. I don’t trust anyone else with a romance this soft, and I cannot wait to read her upcoming series that feature a wlw couple.  

Kae: GEENA SAID IT ALL. Tasha knows how to write a romance. I love soft boi’s that will also murder a man for you if need me. LIKE YAAAS HE’S SENSITIVE AND RESPECTS ME AND WILL BEAT SOMEONE'S ASS FOR ME. WE LOVE TO SEE IT. Honestly though, overall, this was such a stunning sequel. Because Geena and I have read some sequels that were…. How to say this nicely… fucking terrible. Tasha is a phenomenal writer and I know her upcoming series will be great too! This book was full of lessons. One being, SELF HATRED IS FUCKING TRASH. SO LOVE YOURSELF AND YOUR RICH BACKGROUND. BECAUSE PEOPLE WILL LOOK DOWN ON YOU  FOR WHO YOU ARE AND WHERE YOU COMF FROM SOMETIMES, AND YOU JUST GOTTA SAY FUCK ‘EM AND KEEP IT MOVING. 

Geena: JKSNFKJSNDSKJF YAAAS, ALSO IK IT WAS BRIEF BUT LIKE DAMN… TASHA REALLY WENT HARD WITH THE AMRITHI IN THIS BOOK AND HOOBOY… Like the insights into past ancestors? And the fact that there are so many mixed Amrithi people that have been forced to hide their heritage… once again…  I M P E R I A L I S M and G E N O C I D E… this series covered it pretty well… PLEASE READ AND SUPPORT TASHA 

#realm of ash #tasha suri #book review #booklr #book blogging #book blogger #books #reading

[jo2ukes]

rambling and incoherent thoughts under the cut about how deduebert’s love is too powerful and would, ultimately, save the world :’) (spoilers, obviously)

In a canon-compliant AM AU, if we run with my headcanon that the parley meeting between El and Dimi was largely organized and agreed to bc of the (unlabeled but very much romantic) relationship Hubert and Dedue had pre-war. Dedue, at Dimitri’s request, would send a message to Hubert requesting a meeting, knowing that there’s still unresolved feelings between the two of them and that Hubert may be more likely to persuade El to accept an invitation to meet. Canonically, I think it’s fair to say El has closed herself off to any emotions or opportunity for emotion that would detract from her goal (which requires a certain level of detachment, to be fair. On that note, I also think even in just straight up canon AM, Hubert likely convinced her to accept Dimitri’s request to meet). 

During this meeting, I think Dedue and Hubert would likely have had the chance to meet up alone (while El and Dimi talked) and catch up/engage in pillow talk about the current state of affairs. Naturally, knowing Dedue and Hubert, it stands to reason that they would talk at length about their respective liege’s reasons for doing things. Ultimately, I don’t think either of them would go into it with the intention of doing anything other than what El and Dimi wanted, kind of just accepting this would be a last reunion of sorts and then, ultimately parting ways and dying for their respective causes. BUT through their conversations, I think they’d realize they could orchestrate a truce between the Adrestian and Faerghan armies while still accomplishing El and Dimi’s goals and that the truce would be what’s best for their leaders. 

Now you’re saying, wait, that’s not possible- Hubert would want to keep certain info close to his chest! He doesn’t like revealing his hand- he’s most comfortable operating in the shadows and he wouldn’t let a silly little thing like emotion get in the way! And you’re right! BUT his conversations with Dedue (as well as his feelings) would technically be “in the shadows,” more or less, as he’s clearly opened himself up to emotions outside of strict devotion to El (whether he wants to admit it or not). We also know both he and El realize, tactically speaking, fighting a war one front at a time is easier than fighting one on four fronts (Adrestia vs. TWSID, the church, the Kingdom, and the Alliance). They’ve sort of circumvented this by allying with TWSID and taking them out of the equation for the time being (begrudgingly so). So, the more people Hubert can persuade to join El’s cause, the easier their victory will be, even if he has to persuade others behind El’s back. Hubert is canonically shown to disregard/disobey Edelgard’s orders if he sees a better way for her to accomplish her goals (I’m thinking particularly of one of his supports with Ferdie… I believe it’s their B support where he deliberately disobeys her because he sees a better way). I think this is one of those opportunities he’d find it worth going behind El’s back for the following reasons:

El’s goal isn’t necessarily to conquer Fodlan, she just wants to remove the church’s influence and the crest-based hierarchical society that’s universally accepted in Fodlan. 

 As far as we know, (or maybe just as far as I know) she has no issues with the three kingdoms/houses existing as separate, independent nations. (I haven’t run across any dialogue that suggests this) 

Dimi AND Claude also take issue with the crest-based hierarchical society and seek to change it as well.  As such, that makes TWSID the most direct enemies of her goal because, ultimately, they value crest power and seek to hoard it for themselves (again, unfortunately, she’s had to ally with because she is fighting a war on multiple fronts)

El would be motivated to find powerful allies outside of TWSID so she can cut ties with an organization she clearly detests and who fundamentally oppose the future she wants

Faerghus (and Dimitri) are not direct enemies of the Empire/El’s goals even though they are not directly opposed to the church or the church’s existence. 

In AM, Dimitri doesn’t ally with the church out of any sort of loyalty or piety. In fact, it’s probably more correct to state the church allies with Dimi - he has the army, he has the power, he has the means to help them accomplish their goal of freeing Rhea 

In Silver Snow (and I’m assuming in VW), he allies with the church again, not out of loyalty or piety, it’s simply because in that route the church has the army and the power and the means to help him accomplish his goal of avenging the deaths of his family

This is backed up by his scene in the goddess tower- he explicitly states that he doesn’t really believe in the goddess and feels abandoned by her. It’s not that he hates the church or has any of the information that El has which leads her to believe the church is responsible for the inequality in Fodlan, he just sees them as a neutral party (which of course, arguably, they (or, really, Rhea) are not, he just doesn’t know any better).

Telling Dedue the truth about TWSID, and providing evidence about their hand in the Tragedy of Duscur, means El/Adrestia is no longer an enemy to Dimitri or Faerghus. Dimitri’s anger and focus would be on crushing TWSID, thus aligning his goals with El’s. 

What about the Adrestian conquest of Faerghus? Well, if you think about it, Faerghus wasn’t technically occupied directly by Adrestia, they were occupied by TWSID and other nobles swore fealty to the Empire once Cornelia assumed power. Sure, TWSID took control while they were under command of the Empire/allied with the Empire, but even in the CF route, Cornelia is killed/removed from power in Faerghus, standing to reason that El didn’t really want to give TWSID any sort of power/leadership even when they were allies. In AM, if Dimitri hadn’t killed Cornelia, I think we could safely assume El still would have killed her

Dimitri wants to listen to and understand El, he wants to find common ground.

Even in AM, where he still believes she may have had a hand in the Tragedy of Duscur, the whole parlay meeting is his idea because he has opened his heart to the possibility that he is wrong. His overly compassionate nature (once he finds it again) forces himself to look at options that cause the least amount of bloodshed, particularly for his subjects

Once Dedue knows the truth, I think it possible he and Hubert would work together, likely going against direct orders from El and Dimitri and decide to extend negotiations. Since, at this point in AM, for all intents and purposes Claude and the un-recruited Alliance students (save for Lorenz, rip [we will pretend he was recruited]) are technically allied with Dimitri, Dedue could send word to Claude about the parley. News of Claude’s impending arrival would force El and Dimi to prolong their meeting. Upon his arrival, Claude would play a key role in providing information about the church that neither El or Dimi have (namely that the church/the goddess isn’t responsible for the creation of crests) as I’m assuming he still spends his time in AM/CF routes gathering the same information he would gather in VM route. (He likes to have all the information, after all!)

After the three of them meet, and, after a lot of arguing, I think Dimi’s compassion would win out, and El could be swayed to root out corruption in the church rather than completely destroying it. Rhea would be released from captivity in the Empire on the condition she abdicate her position as archbishop (presumably then allowing Byleth to assume the responsibility, paving the way for the church to become the benevolent force it claims to be. Despite what Rhea does behind the scenes- we know she even keeps HUGE secrets from Seteth and Flayn- the church DOES do a lot of good. If the church starts endorsing the message that crests shouldn’t be used to lord power/be used as a symbol of importance, I don’t think El would fundamentally have an issue with the church any longer).

THEN of course, the three leaders (four, counting Byleth who I think would happily lend the Knights of Seiros as well as their own battle prowess) would be free to focus their efforts on attacking and destroying TWSID, which I think could be accomplished fairly quickly (all things considered) with their united abilities and skills. Afterward, they could focus on shaping Fodlan the way they believe it should be (ie- loose/no borders, abolition of social hierarchies/systemic racism, strengthening ties with regions outside of Fodlan (freeing Brigid, restoring Duscur, improving relations with Sreng and Almyra and Dagda), etc. 

Naturally, Hubert would assume his position as Minister of the Imperial Household, Dedue would take up a role as a delegate to Duscur (and probably still build his school bc i’m very partial to that ending), and the two of them would wed as a sign of good faith between Adrestia and Faerghus (and also because, eventually, the two of them will have to face the facts and admit that they’re hopelessly in love). Eventually, their roles in orchestrating peace would be heavily romanticized and turned into a “star-crossed lovers across the battlefield” type opera that both of them would be far too embarrassed to ever see in person.

#im unhinged im really unhinged for these boys and for this happy ending au ok!!!!!! #deduebert #hubert von vestra #dedue molinaro #fire emblem three houses #fe 16 #fe3h #hubert fire emblem #dedue fire emblem #dedue x hubert

[drferox]

🌪️Doubts in hind sight

Anonymous said to @ask-drferox: 1/3🌪️ i'm aware that this is definitely not a black-and-white easy answer kind of thing, but do you have any advice for people who have worries about their vet's handling of a situation? of course 'talk to your vet' is a good one, but aside from that. i sort of feel like even though there obviously wasn't any ill intention, my late cat's hepatic lipidosis wasn't taken as seriously as it should have been and i wasn't given some information about specific treatment concerns that i should have

2/3🌪️ been made aware of. there's nothing that can be done now and i don't want to ascribe blame (bc i feel a lot of guilt about various things too) but having no idea if her treatment probably shouldve played out different or not (or if, given her symptoms, her death was actually as unexpected as the vet thought it was or not) is really interfering with my ability to grieve properly. part of it's a personal issue but i'd like to at least reach some level of closure about this that isn't just

3/3 🌪️'it's impossible to say'. at the same time though i'm aware that feelings like this after losing a pet probably arent uncommon (even when they're unfounded), and ultimately im a layperson and not a professional! i want to be able to examine this without just giving in to 'it is what it is; they're a vet so they made the best choices' (also acknowledging the subjectivity of 'best') but i also don't want to fall into 'i read some papers online so i KNOW that this professional is a dumbass!'

Take this advice with a grain of salt, Anon, as I don’t know which country you’re in and I mostly know about Australia.

I’m very sorry for the loss of your cat. I know hepatic lipidosis can be difficult to turn around even if it’s the only condition at play and can require a lot of intensive care.

If you have a confirmed diagnosis, reading up on it from sources that are not trying to sell you something (an ebook or homeopathic remedies, for example) may or may not put your mind at ease, but it will make you more informed if you still feel the need to ask questions about what has happened.

Asking questions of the treating vet is a good first step, since they were directly involved, and should be able to explain their reasonings and treatment choices.

Consulting with a different vet in the practice is also an option, or taking the medical records & blood results to an unassociated clinic may also give you some peace of mind, though they will be limited in what they can infer by only what it contained in the medical record.

Australia also has a series of Veterinary Registration Boards which can handle cases like these.

The boards register veterinarians to practice (and if they are not registered, it is illegal for them to practice veterinary medicine so that’s a whole other problem). They also mediate complaints or concerns about professional behavior, including malpractice. The only complaints they really don’t handle at all are about pricing of services. That’s for the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission, vets don’t police that among themselves.

If you are in Australia, you can write to the relevant Vet Board and express your concerns or complaint in a letter. (You can’t do this anonymously, by the way). The VB can then write to the vet in question and ask them to explain, relay that to you and go back and forth. They can act as an independent but professionally informed mediator, ensure happenings were to industry standard, explain things, request additional information and so on. And if any sort of malpractice was found to occur, they will handle as appropriate. Whether that’s counseling and training, or something harsher.

I’m not sure of your specific circumstances and whether you feel you need to go that far, but it’s an option that exists in Australia and presumably there are similar setups in other countries.

#veterinarian #vetblr #questioning #professionalism #vet board

[therestlesswitch]

This is going to sound a little crazy but I’m a green witch & I love working with herbs but I don’t do well when it comes to killing the plant to get it’s recourses, it’s a little gut wrenching to me. Any loopholes to get around this so I can still work with plants?

This is super interesting to me. If you really aren’t at peace with using plants after they’ve been harvested for magical purposes, I suggest you maybe form a deeper relationship with those plants. Plants have a relationship with the foraging/harvesting and growth cycles literally as long as they’ve existed. Our energy and physical body is changed so directly by using plants that I think the use of plants is a fundamental part of us, as a planet. 

Also, there are very few herbs that require you to kill the whole plant in order to use it. If you’re using the leaves, fruit, seeds, or stalks of a plant, there’s no reason to kill the plant. And you don’t even have to kill a lot plants for their roots. Some really like being divided every year, where the root ball is separated into parts and then you can either plant out all of those individual rootballs and multiply the number of plants you have, or you can use the harvested roots, and leave the other half in place to grow. 

Another way of thinking about it is that you’re not killing the plant when you harvest it, you’re simply letting the plant complete its purpose on the planet. It’s an energy exchange. Their legacy/spirit lives on because its energy was used for something. And I don’t think that using a plant in a spell is any less natural or complete a death than the plant  just dying in-place and decomposing back to the earth. The energy all gets returned to the earth eventually, in one form or another.

Also, this may or may not be relevant depending on how animistic you are, but if you’re forming a strong enough relationship with the plants that you eat to absorb their energy, then it feels a bit like your relationship with the magical plants (or just things that aren’t generally food) is more like walking on eggshells, and is less stable and comfortable than your relationship with food plants. Personally, I find that the plants I have the closest personal relationships with in terms of spiritual connection are also the ones that I feel the most confident in foraging for. I know how to be respectful to the plants and 

Of course it is 100% up to you if you want to include plants (post-harvest) into your practice or not. This is just my worldview. But if you want to feel better about harvesting something, you can cultivate that plant. Like, if you want to use basil, you can grow 10 basil plants and then use just one. That way you’re cultivating so much more than you’re using and it might help you to feel comfortable using the plants in your practice. 

Or you can simply go out into nature to do all your spellwork or whatever else you need the plant’s energy for. Grow some in your own garden and use it’s energy while it’s growing. If you can’t/dont want to do spells outdoors, you can set stones beneath the plant overnight to absorb its energy, as you would with the moon. And then use that stone in your ritual or spell. Make sure the stone matches the plant’s energy well so they’re not fighting against each other when you do your spellwork.

You can also use potted plants of course, but honestly, unless your plants are thriving and super happy growing indoors where you have them, I wouldn’t use them in a spell. It’s best to use plants that are super perky, healthy, bright and vibrant in your spellwork. But yes, if you’re indoor plants are happy, then feel free to use them in a spell!

So, there’s a few options for you, I hope it was helpful! Do you mind if I put your ask in a podcast episode at some point? I think it’s a really interesting topic to cover!

I’m also going to point out one thought i have and it might be like... way too woo woo for some, but i’m a little high and it seems important. The word loophole in this context feels a little /unintentionally/ (i super understand that this 100% wasn’t your intent, i’m just choosing to read super far into this bc i thought it would be a fun theme to explore. disrespectful to the plants you’re trying to feel comfortable working with. Imagine that the plants are potential employees, and then you say ‘is there a loophole to get around feeling guilty about hiring these people?’ You may have literally zero ill-intentions and in fact might be the best employer out there, going over and above to compensate your workers for their time and energy...but when you say ‘loophole’ in that context, it sort of sounds like you think you have something to be guilty about. Like you already have done something disrespectful. again, this is fully just a thought experiment exploring energy exchange and the implied guilt you feel about that exchange.

Happy Greenwitching!✨🌱

#greenwitch #green witch #ask #mine #herb #herbs #plant #plants #plant witch #plant magic #plant magick #green magic #green magick #witch #witchy #witchcraft #magick #magic #invisiblefrenchfry

[gg-astrology]

if you’re still doing combos, libra sun + cancer moon 💕 thank you

Hey there! 💕 Yes I am!!💕💕 I hope u like it ;; 

[Below Cut: Libra Sun - Cancer Moon 🦀 ] 

phew these people!

I feel like with Libra/Cancer there’s a sense of ‘courage’ in them? They aren’t afraid to get messy and right into sticky business sometimes (areas where Capricorn/Aries might jerk away from)

It’s bravery, to face and figure out pieces of ‘truth’ from situation that requires them to get a lil messy and may sometimes ‘hurt’ other people’s feeling even if they don’t realize it

Like,,, sometimes truth hurts y know?? But the thing about these people is that they’re brave. So they aren’t afraid to question what they know, what they don’t, what they feel/don’t and then try to find something that ‘balances’ it all

In a way, Libra’s diplomacy makes them adept at deflecting and defending themselves. ‘Talk to me in a civilized manner and I’ll address you with such’ kind of deal

Can make them a ‘lil’ unsympathetic and snobby sometimes, but it’s mostly bc they work so hard to get it others have to ‘work’ to get it too yknow?

Can be lazy, but will never like to ‘easy way out’ to something. These people are cautious and astute, comfortable but also formidable.

They’re the crab and the scale, and the representation matters.

One is an inanimate object, it may make the person a lil unsympathetic even when they’re trying to be ‘civilized’ or fair-- it makes them cast judgement/rules/conditions on others without appealing to their compassion/human sense (people work best when you’re not being-- y know, defensive or guarded towards them, gate-keep somewhat)

While the crab represents a soft inner being, a softer more vulnerable, nurturing side that needs to somehow come through. It’s defensive tho, snap it’s claws even when there’s nothing there. It tells others to ‘stay away’ without the Libra/Cancer native realizing. Sometimes-- no matter how kind or knowledgeable they are, they can be somewhat unapproachable because they don’t know how to fully appeal to people in a healthy, sensitive, emotional way.

Give first before ye demand, although they may think ‘this is true’ in regards to how others treat them. They also need to realize they may rarely give to others without ‘conditions’ set on the things they give as well.

Think Pisces, the thing about Cancer Moon is that it’s highly perceptive and intuitive. But Cancer has great potential to be both ‘Scorpio’ in nature and ‘Pisces’ as well. Think of em’ as your shell and inner flesh. 

It’s easier to ‘Have a Shell’ than it does to ‘Open Up’ to others truthfully. This isn’t asking you to like--- expose your vulnerability or something you’re uncomfortable with. It’s asking you to be compassionate first, sympathetic and less conditional, more dreamy. Give others benefit of the doubt sometimes.

Your Libra will keep you inline-- just trust your water that if you let go and let yourself be kind and soft to others, you’ll get the same thing back. Maybe even more appreciation-- which you’d love-- even more with how you approach others socially.

In a way it’s like, Cancer is both your strength and your disadvantage? it empowers you, it gives you strength. But it also makes you lonely because it wants recognition but doesn’t know how to get it. 

Be gentle, be open. Try to think Pisces (I keep mentioning this bc Cancer may have a harder time with ‘lighter’ stuff than ‘darker’ stuff. They’re moody, always emotional but they have to learn how to be in-touch with their optimism/up-lifitng/’lighter water’ side as well. Swimming, fluid, flexible. It’s what the lesson is teaching you. Be adaptable. Be both, the hard and soft. Get to show and know the soft even more than the ‘hard’ and maybe you’ll help your Libra more)

The thing with these square signs is that Libra does want tranquility, to get along, to measure and let things come equally, naturally, fairly. Yet it can be quite passive (despite being cardinal) Libra can wait too long, expect others to come to them. Expect others to ‘realize’ how to reach/treat them without fully acknowledging how it’s treating others.

This ‘mirroring’ aspect of Libra only works to the extent where they don’t realize the slightest bit of opposition makes them ‘skrt’ away from it into the defensive/aggressive immediately. ‘Don’t follow me!! We’ll deal with it when I’m ready!!!’

Cancer can be part of Libra’s bad coping mechanism, bad habit they may need to face. Their emotional fluctuation makes them ‘not feel ready’ for things/people/situation-- can make them stiff, less flexible and stubborn against other people’s concern. 

But anyways, let’s talk about the good part too?

The good thing is---you never lose touch of your emotionality. It might sound like ‘wow big surprise (not)’ but trust me, if you were ever numb to your own emotions then you’re probably fucked (or fucked up pretty bad)

(*if you are tho, you’ll need to ground yourself. Find like a Taurus or Capricorn. They’re good at shaking your shoulders and making you come into consciousness again.)

To others, your outside persona is so charming?

Libra gives off an air of peace and serenity, while Cancer may act as your sharper edge sometimes (your moods will influence how receptive you are to others) but overall–generally, Libra/Cancer people tend to be kind and forgiving, nurturing and generous.

You may pride yourself on being a ‘realistically nice’ person. As in, you’re not a push-over and you have an edge, but you’d like to think there are ‘rules’ that are fair, and within that you can treat everyone equally ‘nicely’. 

You do your best to keep it optimistic, without over-balancing yourself with what you can/can’t do for people (again, not a push-over) -- Although sometimes, there can be opportunities where you hesitate, where you want to ‘take a chance’ with something but waited too long and became too cautious again. 

Go for it! Usually these opportunities are rare, and it’s not often that you’ll get to go on ‘adventures’ like this. You’re mostly concerned about being unprepared, maybe being useless/depending on the other person. But don’t worry about it?

It’s good to let yourself go. If your friend shows up at your house and say ‘lets get it’ -- you won’t have time to think and organize a backpack to take with you, y know? Trust, and rely on others sometimes. It will be ok.  

Ahh you always try to give other people realistic opinions, and options they can take with them (to make meaningful stuff out of it)--  making sure they don’t lead themselves (necessarily) down a darker/wrong path, that’s part of what you’re optimistic/try to exude out so others can take with them about (an angel 🧚‍♀️-- I know the emoji’s a fairy but it’s the only one I have ;; )

Maybe this is just from an outsider’s perspective….but mayhaps you’re the most reactive when someone goes against you (challenges you) than you are in ur everyday self (lovely, diplomatic, resourceful and caring)  

Very woe-is-me, did you realize you get really ‘:|’ about it??? You’ll obviously try to brush it off, not let it get to you ( ‘I have my own/more important shit to think about’)--- but you do care, and turning yourself away from that compromises your compassion and your integrity as well.

It’s ok to take it hard when handling confrontations/people challenging you, what matters is that you learn how to admit that there are things you’re bad at. Or isn’t good at learning.

I think a part of you knows that you don’t do very well with criticism....sometimes constructive criticism when you’re not prepared for it can get you defensive (bc you’re sensitive after all, no matter how much you ‘harden’ it or ‘hide’ it)

Learn how to admit.....and ask others for help, to be patient. Give yourself the space and time to work on this. Don’t expect yourself to just-- be good at it on the first go. But it’s better than denying this to your death bed you know? (I have no doubt you can and will if no-one points it out, you’re incredibly stubborn when you want to be after all.

If you noticed any pattern of you blaming others more than yourself-- it’s probably likely that you were closing off/acting up again some of those instances. Try to evaluate your sensitivity and-- again, take a deep breath and ‘think pisces’. 

Get in touch with keeping your eyes wide, being open and compassionate while being truthful even when it’s uncomfortable to open yourself up so vulnerably is necessary to learn. Remember-- Pisces is also ruler of Jupiter, and Libra can work better with that kind of energy than Cancer sometimes. So be the Best You You Can Possibly Be To Another Person.) 

One thing to note is that you are responsive, while you may also be assertive you are also responsive and much more easily swayed by responses than you’d like to admit. To learn that, take it with you atleast. Make it better for yourself, don’t close yourself off to ‘protect’ your vulnerabilities-- learn to strengthen it by being open, instead of closed-off instead. 

It’ll help you not take it harder on urself as well, Cancer can pent up some stuff y know? So it’s good to know how to ‘let go’ -- so you don’t have to resort to being passive-aggressive sometimes. 

If you need another take on Libra-Cancer squares: Cancer Moons can be quite moody and take responses to things pretty hard. And while the general attitude it exudes off invites mayhem— Libra Sun wants to keep peace, keep diplomacy, keep it’s stance. So it’s like.

If you want to attract good energy then BE that good energy. Your Cancer Moon has more emotions than just being skeptical or critical of something/someone— it could be used to garner attraction to you that would benefit and help your Libra Sun. 

You just gotta be conscious of it, of what you’re exuding out. Because /thats/ whats causing oppositions in your life (whether it’s people irl or on the internet) – people aren’t necessarily jealous or have an agenda out against you for some reason. It’s mostly to do with your own attitude that demeans and attract those kinds of things to you because you’re always ‘looking out in case it happens’ for it.

You are at your best when you are kind, understanding. NOT unrelenting and frustratingly constricted to just yourself. When your Cancer starts to deflect, and Libra tries to control the situation - this is why you’re ‘tense’ and ‘need to stew’ sometimes. 

Reach out to others and truly, learn how to let them guide you/be a good influence on you. If you can have it, let yourself learn/grow how to be open-hearted and open-minded to others as well.

The tension with this square aspect is that it can be the person somewhat moody, always emotional and use their intellect and passiveness as a defensive tactic. 

They think they’re hard but they’re rather soft. You’re the most successful when you are passionate about something, when you do care and realize that you care. You can approach people with genuine love and nurturing kindness. But that comes with the territory of learning how to get/heal past hurt and not let it jade you as well.

I hope this is helpful!! 💕 Thanks for sending this in~ 💕

#anon #asks #libra sun #cancer moon #libra-cancer #libra #cancer

[morethanonepage]

Scenario meme: FinnPoe

yessss thank youuu!

Put a ship in my ask and I will tell you a bit about how each of the following scenarios would go down:

Fake dating: my first impulse on this is to go with an undercover-for-the-resistance thing BUT that’s too played out and obvious so instead I’m picturing a scenario where there’s a lot of downtime on the base for whatever reason and Finn’s like getting all this romantic attention from people bc he’s the young hot resistance hero/has that tragic backstory everyone wants to comfort him over but he’s nervous and uncomfortable being the center of attention like that so Poe’s like ‘hey do you just want me to tell everyone we’re dating so they’ll leave you alone?’ and Finn is partly like ‘that is an absurd solution’ but also he doesn’t have any better ideas so he just goes with it and bc it’s Poe the whole thing’s very chill like they just hold hands a lot and eat together and then the quarter master’s like oh thank god you guys can bunk together bc they need the rooms and that’s the first time where Poe’s like :/ bc he’s sort of into Finn for reals but doesn’t want to make it a thing and Finn’s like oh no Poe doesn’t want to live in the same space, he must not have feelings for me, and anyway it’s awks but it works out in the end.

Bodyswap: I think the most interesting thing to explore here would be the muscle memory – or lack thereof – that they’d have to deal with. Like Finn’s stormtrooper training was so intensive he’s a much better on-the-ground/hand-to-hand fighter than Poe so if he’s in situation where he has to fight people he’d be at a bit of a disadvantage because his reaction time would be off, and all of Poe’s instincts are for piloting so he’d likewise be kind of off, spatially even, because his instincts to like, automatically flip a switch or put just so much spin on turning or whatever would have to be due to conscious thought and effort and not just his gut. So not a very romantic thing but it’d be an interesting look at what their respective history is and it would help them understand each other better. Oh also BB8 would know instantly and freak out.

Sexpollen/fuck or die/aliens made them do it: oooooh I hate these sort of things and they both have kind of sensitive histories regarding control – Finn because of how rigorous the control of the FO was over all aspects of his life, Poe because of his experience being tortured by Kylo – but I think Poe’s instincts would be to fight and struggle and there’s got to be another way out of this whereas Finn’s would be more on the side of this sucks but we’re going to have to do it, here’s how we’re going to survive and have to talk Poe into it because he knows they’ll die otherwise and he can’t let Poe die. So they do it and it’s bad and Finn feels bad about having talked Poe into it and Poe is objectively like glad Finn took control of the situation and was smart enough to get them through it but subjectively he also hates it. THIS IS WHY I HATE DUBCON SEX THINGS. 

Dark!fic: I don’t like making things dark per se but I do (obviously) like making things sad so here’s my two saddest FinnPoe takes: a) Poe is 1000% completely gone on Finn and will probably never love anyone else as much again (rescuing him from torture and certain death and reaffirming his faith in humanity will do that to a person) but Finn is in love with Rey and Rey loves him back, so Poe’s not even going to bother telling him and complicating the situation; and/or b) Finn does feel the same way and Poe is again, 1000% gone for Finn, but Poe’s also just too focused on The Resistance to be able to develop a relationship – and also feels like Finn’s maybe too young to be in anything that serious yet and deserves a chance to have like more low key relationships without it being Super Serious and Forever like Poe would most want it to be – so the timing never quite works out.

Secret kinks: idk if it’s a kink but Poe’s a service top and Finn absolutely does not mind ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Their first kiss: oh it 100% has to be Finn that starts something, right? Like Poe has Feelings and he’s not an idiot, he realizes it and accepts it, but he’s always going to be wary about pressuring Finn or making things weird. Finn is also not an idiot so he kind of gets the feeling Poe is into him but he’s also not super experienced with the whole kissing thing either so it probably takes him a while to work up to it. I don’t see it as like a Big Dramatic Deal kiss though – just something simple, like they’re just hanging out, working on an engine or whatever, they’re just sitting next to each other and talking and Finn just leans over and brings their lips together and Poe is just like, oh. Oh. Oh?! And Finn says something soft and cheesy like I just wanted to see what it’d be like and w/e we/ it’s nice. 

Meeting the parents: Oh my god Kes and Finn meeting is my #1 dream scenario all I want in life is for Kes and Finn to just really vibe with each other, partly to tease Poe for being so intense and Serious Business about the resistance/love/ or w/e but also bc they’re both just like solid, steady, boots on the ground folks while Shara and Poe are the daring pilot types. In terms of Finn’s parents man I don’t think we’ll really get closure on it but at the very least I would like Poe to try and help Finn find them.

Moving in together: After all the Resistance Nonsense, when peace is achieved and the galaxy is saved, I hope Poe follows HIS OWN PARENTS’ EXAMPLE (and not like, Leia’s) and just settles down on Yavin IV to run his droid sanctuary while Finn takes some time to explore the universe and figure out who is outside of war time. But once he has, I think they could be happy together on Yavin – near Poe’s dad, keeping up to date on New Republic stuff but not necessary in the thick of it all. Just a quiet, settled, simple life. I feel like they’ve both earned that.

A crossover of my choice: I’m really picky about crossovers bc I need to be like, canonically plausible (yes I am exactly that pretentious) so the only one I would really buy is Doctor Who, since the a long, long time ago precludes a lot of other options. But I’m not even sure which Doctor. Oh wait it wouldn’t really be a crossover but a version of a Wakanda-like planet that Finn is the secret lost prince of? 15/10 would daydream about again.

An au of my choice: COWBOYS. Vaguely The Magnificent Seven inspired but maybe with less death all around. I just want Poe swinging Finn up on a horse behind him and galloping away while Finn looks back and shoots at whatever bad guys are pursuing them. 

If you like, another trope/scenario of your choices: Again I’m always down for a Long Lost Prince Finn type of scenario, but another AU I started once was a historic regency-ish deal vaguely based on the film Belle where Finn was raised by a rich white aunt and uncle in England, along with his white cousin, Rey, and he’s really well loved by his family and the heir to a fortune but he’s not super accepted into the rest of Upper Society, so he feels like an outsider and there’s a lot of intrigue and conflict about whether he’ll be able to marry or not etc etc, very dramatic. Poe is an artist hired to paint a portrait of ~the family~ on the grounds but he comes to the fancy manor house when Rey is In Town being presented to society and Finn’s aunt and uncle (lbr I’m picturing Han and Leia here) are with her, so no one’s around to supervise this painter guy and it’s up to Finn to take Poe around and show him the grounds and they spend a few weeks together with no one but the servants around and anyway yeah they fall in love, obvs. OBVS. I may still finish this but it would require research which :/

#finnpoe #finn #poe dameron #writing memes #scenario meme #dubcon cw #waverly-earp

[papanorth]

Okay the obvious, tuckington

u kno what i like

001 | send me a ship and I will tell you:

when I started shipping it if I did: About the time where the Freckles Shake incident happened, but before it was revealed that everyone was fine and that Doyle was only as evil as Kimball. That period of “WHAT’S HAPPENING TO WASH DONUT AND SARGE” and Tucker frantically trying to work things out was just too much of the stuff I like for me to resist.

my thoughts:On the ship?? I think everyone knows my thoughts on the ship by now. I love it, I’ve spent too much time thinking about it, I genuinely think those two characters would work well together.

What makes me happy about them:They’re so important to one another! The actual romance part matters less to me than the fact that these two army dudes care about each other a lot and have had a significant impact on each other’s lives. I especially like that they both sort of found what they need/want with one another. Tucker gets someone who inspires or expects him to become a better version of himself, takes him seriously and guides him and has no intentions of leaving him (hello abandonment issues), while Washington gets someone who challenges him and requires him to earn respect (and not just forcibly take it by being intimidating and slightly murderous), jokes around with him, and (importantly) goes back for him if he’s left behind or can’t keep up. They both kinda met when they needed each other (and Caboose, like the entire Blue Team is a part of this ok) and probably surprised themselves with how well they work as a unit. 

What makes me sad about them:Realistically I don’t think their relationship- platonic, romantic, professional or otherwise- will ever be fully explored enough since RvB is a light-hearted series that isn’t very intent on exploring itself.Other than that, though, looking past the whole franchise, I think it’s fairly realistic that they themselves would never like...reach their full potential together. They both have issues and it’d take some major happenings for them to go that extra mile to flesh out their relationship. As a couple, their pining stage might last until one or both of them die or they part ways.

things done in fanfic that annoys me:When either of them is too nice or too like...timid. They’re jerks. Neither of them are good at being with people. Neither of them are the type to be super fluffy feel-good weepy boyfriend that cooks pancakes in the morning, and if that DOES happen, it needs to be peppered with snark and arguing and awkwardness imho. Like...good stuff in fanfic is good when you’re made to wait for it. Jumping right into it ruins it for me.ALSO: being in love doesn’t cure all your ailments. just saying. If a boy’s got trauma under his belt it’s not gonna get fixed like a leaky pipe ok.

things I look for in fanfic:Hurt/comfortHurt/comfortHurt/comfortHurt/comfortNo but I love it when people manage humour in fics, it’s probably really hard but so good when done properly. I like conflict and one or both characters being really stubborn and blind assholes, I like it when they have a serious conversation and communicate properly (possibly after some trial and error), love it when they help each other with their problems. Yeah that’s real far up there actually, loooooove it when any character is considerate of someone’s problems and works to make things more bearable for them. TEAMWORK IN RELATIONSHIPS (this ties directly in with the thing I DON’T like. Love doesn’t fix everything that’s wrong with you, just like, makes it more bearable.)

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: I would have super supported Washington and Connie but......she’s kinda dead. So.I could see Tucker and Kai happening, if only for the laughs on the show. They seem like a propely disastrous couple, and she’s babysat Junior before! (by locking him in a closet or sth lol)

My happily ever after for them:They get their own place on some planet where Junior can chill with them in peace, get some really wacky jobs that don’t entail so much death but also aren’t too boring, and stay in contact with the rest of the Reds and Blues. Maybe even live next to them. Or I’d actually be fine with the R&B teams just like...roaming space together. A family of galaxy crusaders, causing chaos in their wake, like Star Trek but less scientific more illegal. That’d be nice.

who is the big spoon/little spoon:Tucker is clingy so in the event of spooning, probably little spoon, but also he’ll probably turn around and Koala his man. He’s the big spoon in the event that he subconsciously migrates towards Washington’s ass in the night time, or if they start out not-cuddling, bc Wash likes his space and is very used to sleeping alone. So like, he doesn’t really think of cuddling in any way as a natural option so Tucker just ends up hanging onto him in some way. In fact I think Wash would like...always sleep on the very edge of the mattress and even if there’s no room Tucker WILL get his hands on his man. So either of them end up falling out of bed. Possibly both.

what is their favorite non-sexual activity:Arguing lol. I think they’d love just like debating on anything and everything and talking about whatever they feel like. Watching a TV show? Arguing about who the bad guy secretly is and why there’s no way it’s the dad character. Hanging with the reds? Arguing about whether or not Donut has had sex with any of them and if so, who was first. It’s not even really arguing, just like, passionately swapping opinions on things, probably revealing personal things in the meanwhile, learning about each other and shit like that. Convos fo’ days.But since people can’t always talk endlessly I’m also gonna say sleeping together, like taking naps and shit. 

#tuckington #WHOO my hand hurts from typing lol #ofc the very first ask is tuckington. i know my rep #not a draw #Anonymous

[brokemillenial]

This or That meme

tagged by @asugarplumfairy i’m only doing this because im bored tbh ^^;

1. Coke or Pepsi: pepsi all the way its a thousand times sweeter

2. Disney or Dreamworks: disney i guess. they have cool theme parks and stuff. dreamworks aint got that

3. Coffee or tea: mmm i enjoy both but i have to choose coffee

4. Books or movies: *rips open plaid button up to reveal “VIDEO GAME NERD” on my undershirt*

5. Windows or Mac: Windows obvs. who tf has mac money? 

6. DC or Marvel: i mean marvel i guess... do love me some spiderman

7. Xbox or PlayStation: I’m sorry i’ve sold my soul to sony even tho playstation is complete shit sometimes, a deal is a deal, especially when its a soul bartering deal with the devil... 

8. Dragon Age or Mass Effect: MASS EFFECT OBVS have you met me? have you seen my blog? its all i talk about nonstop ahhhh 

9. Night owl or early riser: night owl 🦉 but these days im more of a mid day robin (do robins chill midday? idk) 

10. Cards or chess: ehhh it depends who i’m playing and what i’m playing... chess maybe for fun though. (honest i’ll just stick with my microsoft mahjong pls and thank) 

11. Chocolate or vanilla: *insert pic of the guy from spongebob yelling CHOCOLATE?!*  

12. Vans or Converse: converse yo~ ✌️️✌️️✌️️

13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash, or Adaar: is this a da thing? 

14. Fluff or angst: flufffff:3 I’m so weak

15. Beach or forest: i suppose i should be true to my old ways and say forest, but beaches are growing on me... if it weren’t for getting sand fucking EVERYWHERE they’d already have me. both are peaceful and relaxing though ^^ (given no people are around) 

16. Dogs or Cats: CATS AHHH I LOVE CATS SO MUCH!! I REALLT WISH I COULD HAVE A PET CAT BUT I CAN���T AFFORD IT nevermind we’re not allowed pets at the house we rent... TT.TT 

17. Clear Skies or Rain: USUSALLY i would say that i love the F out of rainy days but its been so cloudy and dreary lately... just give me some sun please!! D:

18. Cooking or eating out: MMM i enjoy when i actually put forth effort to cook things. even if they don’t end up super great i enjoy the experience of making my own food :) 

19. Spicy food or mild food: HAAAAHHHH i once cried because i bit into one of those pepper ball/flake things. i can’t handle any kind of fucking seasoning on my food lmaoooo mild mild mild~

20. Halloween/Samhain or Solstice/Yule/Christmas:  THIS IS HALLOWEEEN THIS IS HALLOWEEN THIS IS HALOOWEEN~~~

21. Would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot (and no the winter coats and ACs are not an option): mmm i’m always a little too cold, which i suppose is nice bc i wan always wrap up in more blankets, but its also annoying af when i can’t get warm or when i have to go out in the cold winter, so imma say a little too hot just to try out how the other side lives

22. If you could have a superpower, what would it be: teleportation. telekenisis, i’d never have to get up for anythign again. i could jsut float everything to me. and i could float myself places too ^^ 

23. Animation or Live action: mmm it depends on the genre of film... 

24. Paragon or renegade? can i say paragade?? bc thats how i play mass effect almost every time.. tbh i want to think i’m a total renegade but i’m SOOOO obnoxiously paragon... 

25. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? EUROPE. or if i have to pick one city specifically, ROME. 

26. Which Mass Effect class do you play as? VANGUARD!!!! CHARGE RIGHT INTO DEATH IDGAF!! but also i fell in love with playing adept through me3 multiplayer. playing other classes requires a bit~ more tactic than just vanguard charging into everything so thats fun  27. Roses or lilies?  LILLIES!! those are my fave. specifically stargazer lillies are my favorite flowers 💓💓💓

28.  Cold dessert or hot dessert? hot dessert. hello? warm cookies? yes pls:)

29. Shower or Bath? shower. like who even takes a bath? that’s like sitting in your own filth water... idk man... not my thing...

30. Okay, my question: Writing or drawing? was i supposed to make my own question? too bad i liked yours lol actually no on second thought i don’t. its impossible to choose between the two. they’re my two favorite hobbies... i guess right now i’m more into drawing though i haven’t done a lot of it recently.. 

i normally don’t do these sort of things so i’m not gonna bother to actually tag anyone, so I’m just gonna “tag” anyone who wants to participate ^^ (do tag me if you do this though because i want to see :) )

#lunarambles #tag meme #long post #about the blogger